#I get that not everyone likes Ben content but if it's all I got motivation for then it's all I'm doing

[traincat]

Is Peter sympathetic to his villains?

It depends on the villain and the circumstance. He can be very sympathetic to his villains. He can understand a villain's motivations but lack sympathy for his actions. Or he can just actively not care at all. It's circumstantial.

(Marvel Knights Spider-Man #12)

These don't have to be like, costume villains either. He's famously not cool about violent street crime or anything targeting women or kids.

Peter, please, a man just died. (ASM v2 #42)

There's villains I don't think Peter, if written in character, should ever have sympathy for. Characters like Morlun, for example, or the Jackal, or Carnage.

There are characters I think he understands but should never be sympathetic towards. I think any sympathy he had for Norman Osborn died with Gwen, and then again with Harry. (This is part of the reason the Good Norman plotline bugged me so much. It wasn't really about making Norman Not Evil, it's just that even if Norman could be un-evil and was genuinely remorseful, I don't think it's good characterization to have Peter treat him with anything but scorn.) It's similar with, say, Doc Ock or the Lizard. These are characters Peter has traditionally felt sympathy for, especially the Lizard who, as Doc Connors, WAS his very good friend. But these are also characters who have committed acts so unforgivable that I think any sympathy Peter has for them should have rightfully died. (It hasn't, in the case of Doc Connors, but we all know Spider-Man writing has been beyond lousy the past decade.) In Doc Ock's case, it was bodyjacking Peter. In the Lizard's case, it's that he ate his own son. (Shed, Amazing Spider-Man #630-633. Don't read it. It's bad and it's also genuinely the most depressing Spider-Man story I've ever read.) There are characters like Sin-Eater, where Peter is just not ever going to be sympathetic towards him, and he's right.

(Spectacular Spider-Man #134)

But there are other villains like Sandman or the Rhino where Peter is sympathetic to their circumstances. It doesn't mean he won't punch them in the face, but he gets it, and it keeps him up at night. There's characters who started off villains, like the Prowler, who became card carrying members of his extended polycule his friends. There's characters like Vermin, where, yes, he was eating people in the sewers, but that is NOT his fault, and Peter understands that. (This is a Vermin stan blog. You have to read Kraven's Last Hunt, The Child Within, and The Death of Vermin to understand. CW for childhood sexual abuse.) You have Kaine, his clone, although most of the sympathetic rumination on Kaine's tragic backstory comes from Ben Reilly, his other clone. There's Harry, who has frequently been a villain, who Peter loves beyond reason and is so greatly sympathetic towards.

(Spectacular Spider-Man #183)

(ASM #599)

There's characters like Ezekiel, who, yeah, tried to kill him, but Peter has a relationship with them. A lot of people have tried to kill him. He can't hold it against everyone. And if you want to count J Jonah Jameson as a Spider-Man villain, Peter is sympathetic towards him and does love him, even if he would rather stick his leg in a bear trap than admit it.

In general, Peter doesn't tolerate or show any sympathy towards people who hurt his friends and family. Lay a finger on them and that's the big red line for him. (See above with Sin-Eater, who murdered Jean DeWolff, a detective who was friends with Spider-Man.)

(ASM #665)

(ASM #598) The face of a man who is about to get parts of his face ripped off. Literally.

(ASM #637) And Kraven's wife getting her face ripped off for her part in the death of his clone, Kaine. (He got better. She did not, but that's Kraven's fault.)

(Spider-Man and Black Cat: The Evil That Men Do #6) Heavy content warnings on this one again for childhood abuse, sexual abuse, and incest. It also retcons Felicia's backstory in a way I don't love, but it has really good Peter and Felicia interaction and the Peter voice is consistently strong.

(ASM #540) With the man who shot Aunt May. As a note, the black suit here is NOT the Venom symbiote, it's the cloth version of the costume. A lot of the times when Peter is written harder and he's in the black suit, there's an assumption that it's the symbiote, influencing him, and that's simply not true in 616. 90% of the time you see the black suit, it's going to be the cloth variation.

Which leads into a big case of Peter Is Never Going to Be Sympathetic: the Kingpin.

(ASM #542) Please please please read Back in Black please please please. It's so good it's my favorite it's angry Peter at his absolute best yes it leads directly in One More Day and no I don't care. You can stop after the Nine Felonies if that's a dealbreaker.

So the Kingpin is the big one for me, because he hits all of Peter's buttons. He's rich, he's corrupt, he thinks he's the most powerful man in the room. Those are all going to tick Peter off immediately, and that was before the assassination attempt on Mary Jane where the bullet struck May instead. He's just never going to feel sympathy for the Kingpin, ever, Wilson Fisk's gay mob boss son is disappointing him is not an excuse that's valid to Peter.

Then there are the villains that Peter isn't sympathetic to not because their actions are beyond his threshold for sympathy, but because he thinks they're total fucking losers.

(Marvel Knights Spider-Man #11) This comic is so deeply bro-y but also really fun, if you can take that much Mark Millar. This is Mac Gargan as Venom, by the way, not Eddie Brock, and Peter has always thought Mac is a gigantic loser. He's not wrong.

(Spectacular Spider-Man #145) He hates a little rich boy. Unless it's one of the two little rich boys that are in love with him.

(Spectacular Spider-Man #185) Don't make fun of the gay walrus, Peter, come on.

Then there's this fucking guy.

This is the Black Fox, an old gentleman thief who thwarts Peter at every turn by looking like a kindly old man and going "heyheyhey c'man man I'm just a little guy I'm just a little birthday boy" at Peter until Peter just lets him go and the Black Fox gets away with everything and Peter tells himself it won't happen next time and then it happens next time.

Every single time and Peter is left standing there like an idiot.

[sehtoast]

blog fell off. u used to actually write but now its all ur oc

that's still writing, numbnuts

[allayessu]

Kaitou Joker headcanons

- Definitely a Nintendo kid. He literally owns a DS in the series

- Religiously plays Mario Kart as Bowser

- Everyone stfu he probably listens to One Direction and OneRepublic. Maybe also a HINT of Odetari and 6arelyhuman for those moments he needs some badass motivation

- He gets along with kids because they remind him of himself. He sees a part of him inside them that he'll never get to be since they remind him of what it would be like if he grew up in a normal household

- That is until kids start being tiny little shits, that's when he's on the edge of duking it out on a 7 year old

- Hates being touched but also touched starved at the same time

- If he goes out in normal terms he'd prefer quiet and less crowded places so he could lower his guard a bit

- Probably studied a bit of fashion on his own I mean LOOK AT HIS DRIPS. THEY'RE ICED

- Is a Cartoon Network kid. Fear him.

- Definitely would watch Ben 10

- Queen drags him by the hair to watch Carmen Sandiego

- Got chased by Hachi with a chancla for eating his salted rice cakes again. Not forgetting Hachi's frilly pink apron

- Does NOT like the idea of cat girls. They remind him too much of Doubt

That's all I have for now if you have any headcanons to share with me PLEASE LET ME KNOW I'M ITCHING FOR MORE KJ CONTENT

[xtrablak674]

[Originally posted on my Livejournal, Saturday July 22, 2000 at 1:53 pm, unedited]

chatting with bluest - part 01

Trevorbrownart: oops

Trevorbrownart: had this buddy list closed

Trevorbrownart: whats his face was on this list....

Bluest0: ok. you got it

Trevorbrownart: even thought I took him off i still had it collapsed

Bluest0: ohhh what's his face

Trevorbrownart: yes whats his face

Bluest0: at least you have a what's his face

Bluest0: i haven't even ben interested in getting one in over a year

Trevorbrownart: i dont have a whats his face anymore

Trevorbrownart: thats over

Bluest0: i know, other fish in the sea, sharks in the water, guppies in the bowl

Trevorbrownart: i have cats.

i think i will stick to pussy

Bluest0: oh god!

Bluest0: why didn't you write another issue of Fashion FAG

Bluest0: i may start doing that 2 by the way

Bluest0: tired of men

Trevorbrownart: well there was the unpublished issue which was the last issue

Trevorbrownart: FFM is supposed to be online now

Bluest0: as partners that is... they lie to much when motivated by sex

Bluest0: i checked it out

Bluest0: i saw the story about you getting fired... interesting

Trevorbrownart: there a few new pieces, but not a consolidated issue

Trevorbrownart: yes that was an interesting story

Trevorbrownart: i have a lot more content from the offline version that I have not put on line yet

Bluest0: oh ok, did you finish the escort story?

Trevorbrownart: nope :)

Trevorbrownart: alot of people are pissed about that

Bluest0: i'm just mad ...

Trevorbrownart: i have to put the old installations on the web

Trevorbrownart: i dragged that story out very deliberately

Bluest0: i know you did... it's a good read and really interesting... and you're originally from Peekskill? how long in brooklyn

Trevorbrownart: well there were many stops before brooklyn

Trevorbrownart: bronx for 6 to 7 years

ithaca for 2 years

then to brooklyn

Trevorbrownart: and europe for 4 months

Bluest0: you lived in ITHACA ... ok, i can see Europe, do you have relatives in Ithaca, how did that happen.. where in Europe, i lived in Germany 2 years

Trevorbrownart: went to college in ithaca

Bluest0: perfect sense made

Bluest0: how do you expose so much of yourself on the web, i do occasionally, but then i take it back by deleting it.

Bluest0: or hiding it somewhere

Bluest0: don't know why i give a crap what people think, mostly i don't some i do

Trevorbrownart: no one knows its there unless they are lookig

Bluest0: and this is all under a false name, Bluest is from Toni Morrison's The Bluest Eyes

Bluest0: true

Trevorbrownart: but fashion fag magazine the offline version was just like that

Trevorbrownart: i called it a public diary

Trevorbrownart: unedited raw emotions

Trevorbrownart: for the public

Trevorbrownart: everyone knows who i am. i dont try to hide it

Trevorbrownart: trevorbrown online.com :)

Trevorbrownart: name is right there

Trevorbrownart: who would i be hiding from?

Trevorbrownart: myself?

Bluest0: that is a very good and free policy... good question

[Afterword: This is just the first part of the discussion that Bluest and I had, I thought I would break it up into smaller parts so I could reply to what was written a bit more succinctly.

As I did my yoga I remembered a couple of things that I failed to mention in my first draft, both Bluest and I based our screen names off of literary masters, her's Toni Morrison mines James Earl Hardy. I think perfect choices, hers a Black woman, mines a gay Black man, authors who reflect us as much as humanly possible and talk about issues relevant to our own identities.

Secondly, I am not sure if I ever went to visits Bluest's blog, I may have briefly back in the day, but I don't recall taking a vested interest in her writings as she was in mines. Now just because someone has an interest in your work doesn't mean you have to have a mutual attraction. Generally speaking I am usually interacting more with men than women on the internets and that has to do with my attraction to men, not a dislike of women. But true to her world Bluest has deleted her blog, so I can't even see what I was missing.

The thing that is first very amusing to me is I say "whats his face" and Bluest knows exactly who I am talking about, it was Tony who before we became friends I dated, yes spoilers.

I am looking back twenty-four years, but I think its important to stay cognitive of what happened later. All this turmoil between Tony and me lead to a friendship that lasted over a decade. It was surprising actually reviewing these old journal entries because that relationship seems so far away.

The question about Fashion Fag is a very relevant one, it speaks to a general trend with me and writing. I go through phases where I am hard core about it, then I go through cooling-off periods where I don't write a word. FFM was covering a lot of emotional material which as Bluest later says I was sharing very intimate items about myself in a very public forum, something that even to this day I don't really have much of an issue with.

Stories like Boys of Summer started more as click-bait, before that was a thing, I knew folks were very fascinated about my brief time as a sex-worker and I knew it would be interesting to recount those adventures while they were fresh in my head. But I only had two clients, one I didn't even perform with, it would have been a very anti-climatic end because there wasn't really more story other than the initial thrill.

There was also a surprise for me, I didn't realize I had written about the events around my short-lived dotcom job, so I would be interested in digging that up and taking a peek. This may mean pulling the files of the actual site to review the text.

My goddess this is so clearly before internet scamming was a big thing, we're talking about where I lived all my previous addresses, things that the identity thieves would love to know about. But to be clear this is Internet 1.0, before we began paving the way to H - E - Double Hockey Sticks.

I love how aware Bluest was of what she was doing at the time and how potentially exposing it could be, I had no such reservations at the time, and still now generally don't, albeit I attempt to be more discreet about personal details for all the aforementioned reasons.

My last question is a good one, who would I be hiding from? I have repeatedly called myself a truth-teller, this has been a theme throughout my life. I didn't just go around telling on other people, I started clearly with myself first. If you can't get to the root of who you are, and why you do the things that you do, how can you focus a lens on others?

My early writings and continued missives are always a journey of self-exploration and examination. I am a person who doesn't take themselves lightly, I have contemplated and considered most aspects of who I am, which is why I give heat to anyone who questions my agency. If I have explored the depths of my traumas and pains, who are you to come along and give me a five minute unsolicited analysis. I am open to those who come with genuine energy, but I will readily get someone all the way together if they are coming for me, especially if they haven't done an accounting of their own house.]

[Photo by Brown Estate]

[klqrambles]

So I finally watched Dorian Gray (2009) and I have never watched a movie that made me feel so many feelings at once.

I feel I should mention from the get go that I had heard many things about it before I started watching, mostly about how it was not a very good adaptation of the book. And I agree, as an adaptation of the book I felt so many things none of which were particularly good. As just a general movie, I’d say it was ~7/10 for me personally. Love me some guys in suits so there was that LMAO, but otherwise parts of the plot felt… underutilized? Basil’s idolatry, Sibyl’s whole deal, and the whole I want to repent plot line they made felt like it was there for a second then just gone. Which is saying something considering Basil’s idolatry is like a Main Part of the Book.

Onto characterizations because I have a bit to say about this. Overall, I think the Dorian isn’t as bad as people made him out to be, personally. Like I know a big point of contention is the way he looks, but I think he works fine as a Dorian? I think he acted the part fine, in the beginning being an innocent little guy who doesn’t know better to hedonistic littol shit with a violent streak. I’ll come back to the stuff with Emily laterr. One thing I can’t forgive though, is that they let Dorian drive. You cannot convince me that boy knows how to make a decent left turn without hitting a pole.

For Basil, loved the actor but didn’t love the characterization. Basil being so open about his art, especially of Dorian, felt wrong? Especially the scene with everyone looking at the portrait and him being proud of it and all that felt so weird to me it completely took me out of the movie for a hot minute. Overall, Basil kinda felt really ancillary to the plot, just there to paint portrait and be killed. My favorite thing about this Basil, though, was his relationship with Henry. Somehow I really got the vibes of two friends so sick of each other it’s a wonder how they’re still friends but they are because they also find each other sickeningly fun to be around. Ben Chaplin as Basil felt pretty good though. He got the nervous painter energy down pat.

Now Henry. Henry. Henry fucking pissed me off. Not in a bad way though? I absolutely hated him but I kept wanting to see what other fucked up shit he’s going to try to do? In the beginning I hated and loved him with equal passion, but by the end both petered out into just kind of, ambivalence. He got old. I got kinda old of him not really changing as a character. Until the end though. At the end I really enjoyed the whole confrontation and the path leading up to it where Henry used his wits to outdo Dorian. Just overall really wildly mixed feelings about that guy.

Sibyl I felt meh about. She was done well I think, but changing the whole motive for her death felt not great for Sibyl, but I could see what they were trying to go for in Dorian’s story so eh. I also hc her as really bubbly and open so to see her more demure and shy threw me for a loop.

Now. Emily. I personally don’t particularly like the introduction of Emily. Or no, I was fine with the introduction of Emily as a person to potentially put Dorian on the “right path”, it was her falling in love with him I didn’t like. I think them staying friends would have been perfectly fine, or even Dorian feeling unrequited feelings for her would have been interesting, but them falling in love and Dorian “trying to be better” and still absolutely failing is what irked me ig. I think I just really wanted him to find someone to like without having to bed them to show him genuinely trying to “be good” or “have a conscience” or whatever. (And I don’t think the idea is “having sex is bad” but “having sex without thinking of how it could affect the people around you in a negative way is bad” and that’s what Dorian does with Emily. He takes her as his wife regardless of how Henry feels because he’s exactly the same fun guy.) Henry could still feel plenty threatened by Dorian’s existence around his daughter that leads to the final scenes without the shtick being marriage. Idk it just feeeeels not great

Just wanted to talk about how I felt about the movie overall again, cause it was wild. For the first 30 minutes of the movie, for some reason I had this unyielding sense of “something’s wrong” that I could not pinpoint (and don’t think I can until I do like a second watch or something) but I THINK it had to do with how off I felt about Basil’s and Henry’s characters. It really felt like the writer had taken the plot of tPoDG and shifted it two steps to the right. The big moments were happening, but something about them are unexplainably w r o n g. Basil getting a funeral was not expected and deserved for Basil, but him never getting one and continuing to be missing was something I really felt was integral to his character? But I am a fan of “Dorian disposes of the body himself” and “Henry gets to see the corrupted Dorian and it Fucks Him Up” plot points so that was fun.

Do I think this will in any way affect the way I characterize the Dorian Gray cast? Not likely. Do I think it’s a decent movie? Yea. Production was good, costuming was good, acting was good. As a movie it was okay. Do I think people should watch it? Yes, if only to understand half of what people are referencing when they talk of tPoDG. Do I want to see more Dorians with dark hair and dark eyes? I don’t see why not! I personally think the dark hair and dark eyes means you can’t look innocent shit some people say is a scam. However, if it’s not someone’s cup of tea that’s their choice. And wishing for a more canon-compliant Dorian is also fine. Just… that phrase specifically makes me smad. But now I’m rambling

Tldr; Dorian Gray (2009) is not a good adaptation of the book at all (imo) due to missing some key plot points, but a decent movie. Will probably watch it again to see if my opinions about it change.

[chuckbass-love]

Johnny smut#4

Hello lovely anon. Thank you so much for this request, again, i’m sorry for the long wait but i didn’t want to write this when i didn’t have much motivation and then have it turn out any less than perfect. I hope it’s worth the wait for you and that you enjoy it.

Also a lil A/N for everyone: To everyone who has requested, i’m gonna get back on it and try and get at least 2 or 3 out per week if possible. I lost motivation for a hot minute but i’m back. I love you all so much. Also, part 7 to only love can hurt like this will be up sometime in the next week or so. I’m still working on it but i already can’t wait for you all to read.

Disclaimer: My work is not to be posted anywhere else other than MY Tumblr, Wattpad and Ao3 without my permission. However, reblogs are welcome.

Pairing: Johnny Storm x Fem!Reader

Prompt #4: “You’d better be quiet if you don’t want to get caught”

Warning: Smut, explicit content, sexual intercourse, hair pulling, choking, mouth covering and swearing. 18+

Word Count: 5,160

GIF NOT MINE!!! Credit to @mcustarks go check them out❤️

Best Friends Brother

As your eyes glance around the beautiful garden filled with white chairs either side of the aisle with flower arrangements all the way to the alter. You can’t help but feel utterly enchanted by the scene, it’s stunning. However, you’re in the wrong place right now, Sue specifically asked you to meet her out back to help her get ready but as soon as you turnaround to head there, you bump into Johnny of all people.

To put it simply, Johnny isn’t exactly your favourite person and you’re not his either. Well, that’s a lie. When around others you don’t get along, you don’t hate each other you just don’t really have much to say since he’s always so cocky and you’re his older sisters best friend. But behind closed doors, the sexual chemistry is off the charts and you’ve spent too many nights tangled up in his sheets to count on two hands.

No one knows about your late night rendezvous though, especially Sue. And she can never find out. It would hurt her. You’re her best friend and Johnny is her little brother. So it’s a secret and it will always remain one.

“Wow” his lips curl up into a genuine smile as his eyes take in your figure in the floor length  dark purple bridesmaid dress you have on “you look, great” he says as he tugs on his bottom lip with his teeth, clearly unable to stop those dirty thoughts running wild in his head.

“Just great?” you ask, brow raising slightly before you chuckle and move to walk past him but he grabs your arm just in time to stop you from going anywhere “not just great, but gorgeous. In fact if this wasn’t my sisters wedding then i’d say you were the best looking one here” he turns his head in your direction, his dreamy blue eyes meeting yours, both filled with lust and need. But you can’t do this here. Today is Sue and Reed’s day.

“Johnny” you whisper lazily, the feel of his skin on yours makes you shiver with desire for him to fill you up, kiss you and make you cum around his cock multiple times but that will have to wait. You really need to snap out of this. So you do, you blink and look back up at him before slowly pulling away from “Sue needs me now, i have to go” and just like that he’s behind you, watching as you walk away. Mostly just to watch the way your ass moves in that dress. You can’t say you blame him though, your ass does look good.

The second you step foot indoors you hear Sue moaning about anything and everything to who sounds like Alicia.

“Your saviour is here” you announce and Sue turns around, beaming at you and you can’t help but stare at her. She looks absolutely breathtaking and her dress is the most beautiful you’ve ever seen. She looks just like a princess.  Alicia then leaves to go and check on Ben, leaving you two to it.

“Sue, you look amazing” tears brim in your eyes, drowning out your vision, she spots it immediately, rushing to hand you a tissue “don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry. You’ll ruin your makeup”

You take it from her, dabbing underneath your eyes before taking the eyeliner from her to re do what couldn’t be saved in time “i can’t believe you’re finally getting your big day” you finish zipping up her dress before helping her out with her veil.

“Well i’ve waited long enough” she laughs as you finish up and you turn her round so she can look at herself in the mirror.

“Now, i just need to finish my make-up. Help a girl out?”

You don’t even bother to respond, instead you start helping, picking up her bag of products. Her foundation is done so it’s just her eye makeup and lipstick that’s left to do. You go with a nice subtle smokey eye with a little silver glitter on top. Then to finish it off you apply some nude lip gloss to her lips before leaving her to do her own mascara, you would hate to mess it up after all.

“Oh i forgot to check with you, is Johnny outside?”

Even the mention of his name has an obvious effect on your body and it’s something you’ve never been able to control but instead of letting it show, you put your poker face on, clearing your throat and mumbling a quick “yes” and thank god she doesn’t catch on or say anything. You must have hid it well.

“Right, ladies the guests are arriving now and Reed is helping them all to their seats so are you ready?” Johnny pokes his head into the room and Sue nods, letting out a deep breath.

He glances at you before Sue walks over to him to make their way to the other room in which she’s going to be leaving out of to walk down the aisle, leaving you standing there sighing.

Guess it’s time for you to take your own place too. You follow closely behind them and then you and Alicia wait for your queue to go, she goes first, then you. Flowers in hand, smiling around at all of the guests, every one of them dressed up in bright colours, wedding hats galore. And as you take your place next to Alicia at the side of the alter, you watch your best friend walk down the aisle with pride. She means the world to you and if there’s one person who’s the most deserving of happiness, it’s her.

Reed wipes away tears as she stands next to him and you feel your heart melting, more tears forming. Johnny watches you from across the way, wiping your own tears of joy before his focus shifts to the vows.

Sometimes he gets urges to ask you out on a date but as quickly as those urges form, they fade. There’s not a chance in hell of you saying yes to him and he knows it. He’s just a hookup and he’s no stranger to half platonic relationships. He’s never particularly been one for commitment anyway but something about you changes his mind. Since you’ve been Sue’s best friend for god knows how long now, he’s watched many guys come and go in and out of your life. He’s watched and even listened to the many times Sue has held you whilst you cried and to tell the truth, he’s never been able to fathom why anyone would ever want to hurt you. Why anyone would ever cheat or leave you. He always had the biggest crush on you and it’s never left. 

Hence why one day he made a move, giving you his best cheesy pick up line at a party Sue threw one weekend. But you ignored him, it was only 2 hours into the party and you weren’t drunk enough to be taking him seriously. However, multiple drinks and shots later, he tried his luck again, and he hit the jackpot. You took him up on his offer. Whilst Sue was in the other room trying to clean up after her guests, you were in Johnny’s room, stripping off in-between heated open mouthed kisses.

It’s pretty obvious where that lead and the next day, you were so mad at yourself for letting it get that far. You cursed alcohol and your stupid brain as you quickly re dressed, repulsed at yourself and your actions. That’s when Johnny shot up, trying his best to make you stay, shutting the door as you tried to open it and standing in the way. You made eye contact with the player and he kissed you. You can’t recall anything else other than feeling captivated by him. His lips moved in sync with yours like they were always made to touch and you couldn’t control the way your body yearned for more.

And the rest is history. Since then you’ve been late night texting and meeting up whenever you could to hook up. Johnny eventually got his own apartment too which only lead to more often than not, the pair of you fucking like rabbits.

It hasn’t just been hookups though, as much as you’d love to lie and pretend that it doesn’t mean a thing, it does. You like Johnny, of course you do. He’s actually the only guy that’s ever been able to make you cum. The only guy who isn’t completely selfish in bed. He makes it all about you, every dam time and you feel torn when it comes to him. A huge part of you knows the two of you feel something deeper and more than just sex. You feel something more intimate. It’s definitely not love but it could be, one day.

Before you know it, you’re ripped from your Johnny themed thoughts as everyone starts cheering and clapping. You join in, watching Reed kiss Sue passionately before the two of them walk back up the aisle. You, Alicia, Johnny and Ben all follow behind with the guests joining in.

The reception is just inside and as soon as you all enter, the music begins. The real old school music. You’re The One That I Want from Grease. The DJ really has a way of luring everyone onto the dance floor right away. Usually at weddings, everyone sits down drinking and chilling before the buffet food comes out but not this wedding.

Sue grabs your hand and the two of you re enact the classic Sandy and Danny scene, overly dramatic though of course and unbeknownst to you, Johnny is watching your every move, unable to stop himself grinning like a cheshire cat. It’s very clear you’re having the time of your life and all he wants is to be able to dance with you.

Once the song is over, you walk around the room to look for the table that you’re going to be sitting at until you hear “over here” and you know that voice anywhere. You turn around to find Johnny sat down, a large glass of wine next to his beer. He ordered for you? Why?

“You’re next to me, hope that’s okay” he stands up, helping you into your chair and tucking it in for you before taking his seat again and sliding the glass of wine to you.

“White wine is still your favourite, right?” nerves fill his voice as he keeps his eyes locked on you “yes, it is. You remembered. Thank you” you waste no time in taking a big gulp of it, you can practically feel yourself getting aroused just by sitting next to the man and to think you’re going to have to deal with it the whole day is torture.

You press your thighs together, trying your hardest to stop whatever is happening in its tracks.

“You not going to dance some more?” he asks, sitting back in his chair, one arm draped round the back of yours “maybe in a minute, i’m still recovering from the first one” you giggle nervously, scared of being seen with him. Sure, you were put with him by Sue herself but what if your farce comes apart now, after all, he is being nice to you and the resting bitch face is missing instead a happy expression has taken its place.

Maybe no one will notice since it’s Sue’s big day, that could be the excuse you use if anyone says anything but then again, why should you care to make excuses? If you enjoy his company that shouldn’t be an issue. Maybe Sue won’t care. She’s always wanted Johnny to settle down with someone nice and you’re nice, right? She’s also wanted you to find someone too. But her best friend and brother getting together probably isn’t what she had in mind.

The song Crazy In Love by Beyonce comes on and Sue practically summons you to the dance floor, so you down the rest of your wine before you rush over to join her. Skipping the regular moves, you and Sue both start dancing like it’s just the two of you. No move off limits as you both grind your hips in circles, shaking your asses and laughing your heads off. She is the only person in this world that can make you laugh like that and you feel incredibly lucky to have her and to be here for her big day.

As your moves get more risqué you catch Johnny adjusting his cock in his dress trousers before drinking more of his beer.

The tension is building within you and you’ve never had to fight temptation so much in the whole year that you two have been doing this. You’re usually very good at waiting and making him wait for it but right now, it’s too hard. The next song that comes on is Check On It by Beyonce, again.

The more of the song that you dance to, you notice the lyrics surprisingly match your situation and a wave of confidence drenches you like rain.

If you got it flaunt it, boy I know you want it While I turn around you watch me check up on it Oh you watchin me shake it, I see it in ya face Ya can't take it, it's blazin’, you watch me in amazement

You continue to show off your best assets, making sure you tease and wind him up more before you make any kind of move which is what you usually do. Any time the two of you fool around, you make him wait and earn it, but it’s one of many reasons why he loves hooking up with you, you’re not easy, you know your worth and you’re 100% worth the wait.

The song finishes leaving yourself and Sue breathless almost. Reed stalks closer, handing his bride a drink and you head over to the bar to get another for yourself before sitting back down again. The buffet will be available soon and you’re desperate for something to eat. Peckish isn’t the word.

“Hello again” Johnny beams and you sip some more wine, a rather big sip yet again before you respond “hello. Are you gonna sit here the whole night?” you question with genuine curiosity, he only really danced a little when the Grease song was on but that’s about it and you aren’t oblivious to the other women checking him out.

“No i intend to dance i just need to be drunk enough for it first”

“I see, maybe then one of those lovely ladies will get a chance to dance with you” you say, observing one in particular who has been staring non stop.

“Please, i’d rather dance with you”

Your heart skips a beat and dare you say it, your vagina develops one. He’s such a sweet talker.

“You looked good out there, y’know” he motions towards the dance floor as if you didn’t already clock on to what he meant and you can’t deny the way your cheeks start to heat up as you thank him shyly.

That’s when he leans closer to your ear, his arm round the back of your chair again as he rasps “and that ass of yours in this dress, baby you got me so hard” his breath fans your neck as he returns to his normal sitting position but he doesn’t miss the way your breath hitches at the dirty comment. He knows all too well the effect he has on you and you know the effect you have on him.

In the past all it’s taken for him is for you to bite your lip and stare him down for him to get hard before. You’re his weakness.

Before you can even go to respond to him though, he clears his throat, tapping away on his phone as he stands up “anyway, if you’ll excuse me, nature calls” he slips his phone back into his pocket, walking away towards the toilets which just so happens to be right behind the DJ.

Your phone buzzes and you check to see a message from him ‘You coming?’ the text reads.

And that alone is enough for you to choke on your own saliva. You quickly sip your drink before standing up yourself and making your way over to the mens toilets. Thank God no one saw you.

“Johnny” you whisper yell until one of the cubicle doors opens, the bigger one at the end. He winks at you as he appears in the doorway and you strut over to him, allowing him to pull you in and lock the door. Your body is flush against his as he starts to kiss your collarbone first. If Johnny is anything it’s a man who loves to savour the moment. He hates quickies and loves to take his time with you.

You’re obviously not the first woman to fall victim to his touch but you’re the only one right now and you’re glad that he’s had experience, it’s clearly made him all the more sensational  in the bedroom.

“Oh” you throw your head back on a quiet moan, hoping not to be too loud despite music blasting outside making it impossible for anyone to hear you.

“Every time you dance, you drive me crazy. Shaking that perfect ass of yours in this dress, making me want you so bad” his lips hover over your sweet spot, his breath fanning it just like it did before.

You wrap your arms loosely round his neck as your back arches and his lips attack your neck like a man possessed, everything about this moment should feel wrong and yet it feels so right. The thought crosses your mind that everyone is out there dancing and most likely eating now all while Johnny is playing with your dress, lifting it up to reveal the new panties that you brought for today. Purple lace to match your dress.

“Oh baby” he groans, tugging on his bottom lip at the sight as his fingers wonder down and slip inside. His cold palm cups your sex making you shiver in surprise before he makes you forget all about it by spinning you around so that you’re pressed against the wall. Caged in by his muscular body as he towers over you.

He presses a chaste kiss to the back of your neck and heat starts to rise to your cheeks, you can’t contain the flustered feeling that fills you. He’s always had a way of being so dominant and stealing all control from you in an instant, since you’re so used to the roles being reversed in your life, he was more than into changing that. And to tell the truth, it’s one of the many reasons that you keep coming back. He pushes you out of your comfort zone in more ways than one.

His fingers play with the flimsy material of your new panties, grazing over your clit multiple times until you’re poking your ass out into his hand. “Someones keen, huh?” his low, raspy and taunting chuckle fills your ear sending shivers up and down your spine and causing goosebumps to form all over your hungry body.

“Please, Johnny” you beg pathetically, once again pushing back against his hand in hopes that he’ll get a move on and touch your properly. Which of course he does. You know he can never resist your charm. All the more reason why he’s slipping your panties to the side now so that his fingers can circle your arousal covered hole, almost dipping into your honey pot but holding back.

“Beg for it” he growls, taking your right earlobe between his teeth and biting down lightly “beg like the good girl i know you are” he continues and you gasp before breathing out a quick plea “p-please touch me Johnny, i need it” as your hands find purchase on the wall.

The feel of his knee spreading your legs apart gets you all the more excited for what’s the come and that’s when he gives you all that you’ve been craving, slipping two thick digits inside of you, coating them in your juices as they hit that spongy spot. He’s never had much trouble when it comes to finding your weak spots, he knows your body inside and out at this point and there’s not a time where you don’t cum when you’re with him.

“That good baby? My fingers getting that little cunt ready for my cock”

Your eyes roll to the back of your head in reaction to the pure filth leaving his not so innocent mouth and just as you go to let out a near enough pornographic style moan, throwing your head back too, the restroom door opens making you stop yourself. Footsteps make their way to one of the cubicles that just so happens to be next to the one your in.

Johnny then takes it upon himself to pull his drenched fingers out of you, reaching his hand in front of your face and shoving them into your mouth for you to suck on, using his free hand to undo his belt and now you know that you’re done for. You know exactly what he’s about to do. His cock rests at your entrance, staying there for a second before he slides in. Your walls welcome him in the best way, wrapping around his cock as he splits you open, stretching you beautifully yet again just like he does every time. The all too familiar feeling consumes you.

“You’d better be quiet if you don’t want to get caught” he mutters in hushed tones, switching it up so that his hand is fully covering your mouth, suffocating you as he drags his cock along your warm velvety walls deliciously. Obviously you don’t want to get caught but right now the anticipation of what could happen is enough to make you clamp down around him, earning a hiss.

A noise that obviously catches the attention of whomever is next door to your cubicle since the unsuspecting gentleman speaks up “are you okay in there, man?” shit. It’s Ben. You feel a wave of shame wash over you as Johnny picks his pace up slowly “yeah, everything's fine” he chirps, as if he has all the time in the world to converse when he’s buried balls deep inside of you.

“If you say so” Ben responds before flushing, washing his hands and then leaving the room. Now it’s just the two of you again. Johnny takes full advantage of the alone time by pushing you right up against the wall, your cheek squished against the tiles, his calloused hands splaying across your ass cheeks now and spreading them apart. Only so he can take a good look at the way he disappears into your tight chanel with ease.

“Doing so well baby, taking this cock like a fucking pro” he grunts, wrapping his hand around your neck and pulling your head back with the help of his other hand grabbing a fistful of your hair at the scalp but keeping your whole body pressed into the wall.

Sinful moans escape your mouth and at this point you’re way past the point of caring or trying to be quiet. Unless someone walks in then you’re going to let go and revel in the feel of him. The way his body traps you in makes your clit pulsate, you love being manhandled and you always have but only by him.

Anyone that takes even so much as a look at Johnny, they think ‘player’ and they’d be right but they’d also think he’d never be the type of man to be as filthy as he is in reality. Not only has he got a foul mouth on him but he’s kinky not to mention skilful in more areas than one. Dick and tongue game on point as well as those magical digits of his and the way they dance across your sex both delicately and brutally all at the same time.

You’re certainly not complaining though. 

“Fuck, Johnny” your back arches even more so than it was before as you shakily cry out his name with the kind of want that only he can spur on “what is it baby?”

“Don’t stop, i’m so close” you whimper desperately.

His pace is now rendering on animalistic as he fucks you into the wall with such vigor, wanting nothing more than to feel you come undone all over his cock, something he’ll never grow tired of.

“Come on then baby, give it to me” he eggs you on, keeping one hand wrapped around your neck still, tightening as the seconds tick by whilst his other hand smacks down on your exposed ass cheek, making it wobble a little which earns him a satisfied hum.

The two of you go crazy with you pushing back to meet his thrusts and him spanking your ass, both of you hungry for that release.

All of a sudden though the blaring music coming from outside stops. Making you panic. Johnny on the other hand is so close to reaching his peak and he knows you are too, so he doesn’t bother to stop.

But you hear the faint laughs of the wedding guests before what sounds like the DJ addressing everyone. Fuck. This better not be the speeches. You had one planned and so did Johnny.

He continues to fuck into you, grunting, growling and panting in your ear, driving you closer and closer to that edge. You can feel the coil twisting and turning in your stomach, on the verge of snapping at any second and you don’t think you’ll be able to hold back the noises when it happens.

“Gonna make you cream all over this cock baby and best believe i’ll be filling this sweet cunt up with my cum”

You rest your hand over his around your neck as your whole body starts to shake. You clench around his cock some more and just as you can taste the orgasm, the addition of his fingers pressing down on your clit push you off the edge and your head drops back onto his shoulder. The music starts up again, allowing you to really enjoy this. Your mouth hangs open whilst you scrunch your eyes closed, seeing stars as you fall into a pit of ecstasy. You can feel your legs shaking and threatening to give way but luckily for you Johnny moves his hands to your waist, wrapping around you so he can hold you up whilst he comes close to reaching his own end.

“Fuckkkkk, squeezing me so good baby”

You do it again for good measure and sure enough, he twitches inside of you, his hot cum painting your walls just like he said and a fucked out spent smile forms on your face making him laugh when he sees.

He rides the two of you through your highs before his thrusts come to a halt and he slowly pulls out. He then grabs some tissues, dropping to his knees and pressing yet another chaste kiss to your clit this time before cleaning you up. He can see that you’re struggling to stand so the second he’s done he rises to his feet, pulling you flush against him and then proceeding to push you up against the wall.

The two of you stare deep into each others eyes for a couple seconds, both of your chests rising and falling as you try to normalise your breathing. That was certainly an adventurous, dangerous and thrilling experience, one that you won’t be rushing to partake in again anytime soon. But it was amazing to say the least. The way he’s looking at you right now makes you want to throw caution to the wind and kiss him. So you do. You crash your lips to his, wrapping your arms loosely around his neck and as expected, he kisses back. His grip tightens on your hips, pulling you even closer if that’s even possible.

“What was that for?” he asks as you come up for air and you shrug, not even sure of what it was yourself. But all you know is you like him and this isn’t just some fling to you, some form of messing around until the two of you get bored. There is a genuine connection there, one that you can’t wait to explore some more.

“I don’t even know” you giggle, pecking his lips again.

Silence falls upon the two of you before he finally blurts out “go out with me” as if he’s telling you rather than asking.

“What?” you furrow your brows in confusion.

“Go out with me, on a date”

“I thought Johnny Storm didn’t do dates” you quip back, raising your brows with a smirk to match “i don’t but i’d like to try if it’s with you” and that alone warms your heart. The same heart that’s been crushed and broken so many times before and it’s almost like he’s mending it. Not that you’re complaining.

You take no longer than a second to think before you’re agreeing and kissing him some more. That’s when the music stops and you both look at each other.

He quickly zips up his pants, doing his belt up again and shrugging his jacket back on before turning back to you. With you both now looking decent again, you get him to check your makeup, he wipes the stray bits of mascara that smudged before kissing your forehead.

He lets you leave first whilst he waits an appropriate 2 minutes before he heads out too. No one suspected a thing and now it’s time for the speeches.

This is definitely going to be a wedding to remember...

---------------------

Me and all my hoe personalities after writing this one: 

General Tags: @deadlymistress24 @coffeebooksandfandom @chris-butt @holtzkinnon @mychemicalimagines @llamadelreyx @haus-of-bitch-talk @buckstaybucky @thewinchestergirl1208 @chrissquares @patzammit @dummiesshort @cevans-fics @americasass91 @toni9 @aaliferous @bradfordmyworld @thereisa8ella @kaminorogers @yassspose @randomsevans 

Just Chris & His Characters Tags: @onetwo3000 @persephonequeenofthedead @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @rynabarnesrogers @princess-evans-addict @stxvercgersslut @chris-evanslover @bval-1 @thejemersoninferno @denisemarieangelina @janeyboo @evansphnx12 @whxre4cevans

LMK if you wanna be added to my tag list...

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

so get this. I was gonna roll around in Tombstone related fluff today - but no, no - this post came across my dash so Now We Are Gonna Discuss the Carnal Consumption of Meat as it appears on That Show Supernatural.  YEAH BUDDIES!

(also my sincere apologies to OP of the inspiration post who innocently tagged it with “lunch date!”  because I am about to go Elsewhere, cursedly).

Let’s all go meat man, after the cut!

This analysis centers primarily on 5x14 Bloody Valentine.  The title of course is a semi-homage to a 3D Slasher Film Jensen starred in circa 2009. 

Which I will be renting soon I guess.  ,[<- parasocial panda GET BACK IN YOUR ENCLOSURE]

Also Its Really Fun that the trailer for Said Cinema ends with “nothing says date movie like a 3-D ride to hell” [are you also thinking of Cas pulling Dean out of hell, or are you normal?]  ***unironically the teaser for 5x14 is -

EXT. SIDEWALK - IN FRONT OF ALICE'S APARTMENT BUILDING

RUSSEL 

First date.

They then eat each other.  Literally they eat each others flesh.  They also do it while dirty talking about it.  SPN IS A SHOW 

ALICE Ugh! I've been so alone. So empty...

RUSSEL I know. Me too.

ALICE I want you, Russel---All of you... inside me...

[they both take bites out of each other, Alice chewing on a piece of Russel's flesh]

****Remember this detail, as it is important.

ANYWAY, it’s truly Cursed that not only are we doing an homage to this 3-D Jensen Horror Date Flick but also this episode is specifically centered on Valentine’s Day.  The day honoring romance and love Now Coopted by Hallmark, everyone, that is the day spn writers chose to introduce us to 

Sir Horseman of THE Biblical Apocalypse Famine. 

Canonically, we are aware that the show is drawing from the book of Revelations in its depiction of the Four Horsemen.  Here’s what it says about Famine -

"When He broke the third seal, I heard the third living creature saying, "Come." I looked, and behold, a black horse; and he who sat on it had a pair of scales in his hand.”

-Revelations 6:5

Famine holds scales (used to weigh out grain in times of food scarcity).  Spn’s depiction is represented as hunger, a bottomless pit of need.  It consumes souls (demon and human alike).  

Cas describes Famine a little more poetically:

CASTIEL 

"And then will come Famine riding on a black steed. He will ride into the land of plenty... "

"... and great will be the Horseman's hunger, for he is hunger. "

"His hunger will seep out and poison the air. "

***Consider a prior season in which we are introduced to the Seven Deadly Sins.  Which are the sins associated with hunger?

Gluttony

and Lust.

***this is also important

Back to the episode.  Case cold open, and we find out that Alice was a Nice Girl.  In that she didnt drink, smoke or

have premarital sex.

***So Alice’s hunger for the sin of Lust caused her to succumb to it; and her demise was presented as Gluttony (literally eating her partner’s flesh). HMM

Famine’s presence is affecting the town, and Cas is not immune.

DEAN 

And when did you start eating?

CASTIEL 

Exactly. My hunger-- it's a clue, actually.

***They lay it out a little more in case you missed it ->

SAM 

I thought famine meant starvation, like as in, you know, food.

CASTIEL 

Yes. Absolutely. But not just food. I mean, everyone seems to be starving for something--Sex, attention, drugs, love...

***this is so important.  but of course because its spn and our textual narrators are generally unreliable (even in a Ben Edlund episode, yes I know)

we get a red herring

CASTIEL 

Right. The cherub made them crave love, and then Famine came, and made them rabid for it.

***but that’s not accurate.  they didn’t get married or become obsessed with each other (remember the cursed coin in 4x08 Wishful Thinking and the unconditional love wish? not what happened here). they had premarital sex.  they did the thing Alice considers wrong, and dark, and sinful.  and then they ate each others’ flesh.

DEAN 

Okay, but what about you? I mean, since when do angels secretly hunger for White Castle?

CASTIEL 

It's my vessel-- Jimmy. His, uh, appetite for red meat has been touched by Famine's effect

***mad lad Jimmy Novak’s hunger is for...red meat?  He is starving for red meat?  You are telling me that the Novaks, red blooded conservative religious midwestern Novaks, ate RED MEAT SO SPARINGLY that Jimmy Novak was LITERALLY starving for it?!?!  No way.  Absolutely no way.  This is a man who was such a religious zealot he STUCK HIS HAND IN BOILING WATER and accepted an angel of the lord into his own body but his secret hunger was for fucking ground beef?

give me a damn break.

to me this is an absolute coverup.  Because Cas’s burger consumption is not related one iota to his vessel Jimmy Novak.

it is a representation of Cas falling.  Cas’s cravings for meat represent his growing (and very much prohibited) feelings for...humanity (Dean Winchester), and they are presenting as Gluttony in the form of his downing more and more copious amounts of red meat.  

SERIOUSLY, consider this - at one point the depiction is so desperately carnal that he is eating raw ground beef with his bare hands. It is fucking uncomfortable.  and it is SUPPOSED to be.  Famine stirs up hunger for the prohibited.  For the sinful. That which we are starving for but do not believe we can ever have, so we lust and we lust and we LUST after it, but should we allow ourselves even just a taste of what we have been ravenously craving, we binge it until we ourselves disappear into the oblivion of our own sinful, dark desires.

Since You Want More Examples of why this cant possibly be hunger for Cheeseburgers and Cheeseburgers alone, Consider Famine’s effect on Dean.  Remember his doctor kink?

**when its revealed that Doctor Corman has succumbed to Famine’s poison by drinking himself to death, Dean - very uncharacteristically by the way - reacts by saying out loud

DEAN Thanks. Crap! I really kind of liked this guy.

***please note that Doctor Corman says the following to Dean in the prior scene they have together -

DR. CORMAN [to Dean]

Agent Marley, you just can't stay away.

****was that a flirtation?

***Also, Dean doesn’t want to go out and chase tail for Valentines Day.   

SAM

I mean, what do you always call it-- Uh, unattached drifter Christmas?

DEAN 

Oh, yeah. Well... be that as it may...I don't know. Guess I'm not feeling it this year.

SAM 

So you're not into bars full of lonely women?

DEAN 

Nah, I guess not. [takes a sip of his beer] Ahh. What?

SAM 

That's when a dog doesn't eat-- That's when you know something's really wrong.

***oh look we are relating things to eating again.  sex/lust to gluttony.  hmmm hmmm hmmm

ANYHOW -  *takes deep breath*

 this is also the Episode Where This Scene Lives

****JACKTING JOICES

oh and speaking of jacting joices, this is also the Dean Notices Cupids Crotch Episode.

frAckles, I am once again asking why you only permit celestial beings to hug you from behi-[gunshots]

but Dean isn’t hungry.  Why? Famine has the explanation, and we get it after Dean immediately runs inside after Cas heads in to complete his portion of their plan barely giving him any time to do so because he misses him that much.

FAMINE 

I disagree. [Famine moves closer to Dean and touches him] Yes. I see. That's one deep, dark nothing you got there, Dean. Can't fill it, can you? Not with food or drink. Not even with sex.

DEAN 

Oh, you're so full of crap.

FAMINE 

Oh, you can smirk and joke and lie to your brother, lie to yourself, but not to me! 

***not Dean making all of those homophobic/homoerotic jokes every time he’s in danger or feeing uncomfortable; not that, that can’t possibly be what Famine is referencing, right?

I can see inside you, Dean. I can see how broken you are, how defeated. 

***not THIS parallel:

AMARA:

You're a mystery. I can see inside your heart. Feel the love you feel, except… It's cloaked in shame

You can't win, and you know it. But you just keep fighting. Just... keep going through the motions. 

***not the motions of performative heterosexuality!!

***Dean’s not hungry because in his heart he truly believes that he can’t actually have what he hungers for.  That Thing Which This Episode Overtly but Also Very Clearly Made Obvious.  It’s an angel riding shotgun [I did Do That and I am Not Sorry], eating a burger in the front seat of the impala.  But, I’ve deviated from the meat of this essay [gunshots] [this time just for the bad joke].

BONUS

there’s Exists another episode in which a man ravenously consumes red meat; eventually succumbing to eating raw beef with his bare hands in the season prior to this one.  

Yes Supernatural the Show That Brought Us Not One But Two Scenes of Persons Carnally Consuming Red Meat With Their Bare Hands.  

This episode is a MOTW - the man in question is a rougaru - a monster that starts out as human but due to some specific genetic disorder (hmmm hmmm hmm crack in THE chassis hmmm hmmm) soon begins to be extremely hungry - “for everything, but eventually long pig.” AKA human flesh. 

Wanna know the kicker?  

Episode’s called Metamorphosis.

(GIF by jackttwist)

I’ll see myself out.

[DOUBLE BONUS for extra credit:

if you really wanna wild out, go watch the scene of Jack the rougaru looking at himself in the mirror in 4x04 - and then meander on over to 7x01 and check out God!stiel looking in the mirror as the leviathans writhe inside him over there. It’s worth the walk.]

***oh and @lilac-void​ im tagging you in this one because in exchange for your KIND creator content nomination I guess I will respond by cursing you with an Honorary tag in this, a Meat Meta.  you’re welcome slash I'm sorry XO [but seriously thank you again for your kindness and appreciation; it really motivated me to sit down and get moving on making more content <3]

[dauntingdarling]

In Defense of the Weeping Monk

So during my first ramped scrolling of Weeping Monk content post-completion of the series, I came across a number of people against the Weeping Monk not just for this storyline but because of how people have been quick to obsess over him and ship Nimulot.

In particular, calling the Nimulot ship racist or homophobic, his character a predator, and those shipping him with anyone toxic. While these points are valid and come from a place (I would assume) of good intentions (anti-homophobia, anti-racist, protect the children etc.) they are strong accusations that should not be linked to this character. And here’s why:

Racism:

-I’m going to be blunt here. Seeing as Racism isn’t a joke, it shouldn’t be thrown around as an excuse not to like WM just because said character didn’t end up with a person of color. If you don’t like him, you don’t like him. Don’t blanket cover your reasoning with a serious accusation that even today is still running rampid and needs to be taken seriously in today’s society (see George Floyd)

-It would be one thing to call out a show if they were expressing Racist undertones, but Cursed hasn't. Two of the most powerful characters in King Arthur lore are played by wonderful actors of color (Arthur and sister Morgana) and should this show continue, we will see the pair of them raise in the ranks of power for both good (King Arthur) and evil (Morgan le fay). 

-People are stating that WM should have been black, as we’ve had more than enough white edgy boys out in shows and movies (see Winter Solider, Kylo Ren/Ben solo...) I’m not against the idea of a black or someone other than white actor portraying WM. That’s not my fight. My fight is over disliking Daniel Sharman’s casting because of his race rather than his acting skill. The guy plays WM fantastically and shouldn’t be docked points just because he’s a white British guy. Like... come on. 

-I could go on, but we have more topics to cover so I’ll close this part with this: keep up the good fight to end Racism, but don’t use it to elevate your own ship/actor profile/ etc. 

Throwing around this topic to benefit your own belief (more than just in media) is what makes people degrade racism in the first place. Don’t be that person.

Homophobia: 

-WHY WOULD SHIPPING NIMULOT BE HOMOPHOBIC? WHY

-I would have thought this show already established that they were not homophobic seen by the great response Nimue gave to Morgana after spotting the scene above^. She normalized their relationship as any other and that was beautiful *chef’s kiss* 

-Back to WM, from what I read on the topic from a person with this view, they stated that because people are shipping Nimulot over Nimue and Morgana (I’m sorry I don’t know their ship name), they are homophobic? WHAT

-Dude that’s great that you saw the fantastic chemistry between Morgana and Nimue, but do you really want Nimue to bed both siblings like that? 

-What I just stated isn’t my real fight on the topic, it’s just something I just thought of as I am here typing away. My fight here is just because Nimue hasn't entertained the possibility of a romantic relationship with Morgana doesn’t mean those shipping Nimue and WM together are homophobic. We just are ex-reylo trash (as I’m noticing so far) and love the enemies to lovers trop. 

-Also I am pretty sure that those shipping Nimulot adore the relationship Nimue has with Morgana as they give off major feminism vibes. And have a healthy relationship overall. 

Which brings me to my next point:

Toxic Shipping:

-No one is stating that WM should hook up with Nimue immediately. And if they are, take notes. WM still needs to grow from the horrors he has done in the past and what he has ahead of him. Only then would he be deserving of Nimue (should she take him)

-I honestly believe people are not shipping Nimulot because it’s toxic, but rather because they hope that WM will come around on the other side as a better man (for he has been through the ringer) and should find peace. With Nimue? Sure, if the storyline fits. 

-I’ve read that some don’t want Nimue to be the fixer upper of WM, and I agree, but do not find this statement to be enough to call the Nimue ship toxic by any means. We just want to see everyone happy, is that so bad? 

-And after growing up idolizing the major character arch of Zuko from Avatar the Last Airbender, I can’t help but hope (as the optimist that I am) that WM will get a similar ending to Zuko. 

-As for why people want Nimue with him and not, say Gwenevere, it is because of all the similarities they carry so far that complement each other (while also playing the opposites attract card). Similarities include:

cursed out fay (N- the villagers scorning her, WM- the monks attitude toward him as a weapon and not a being)

lingering on the edge of dark and light (N with the cursed sword, WM with his faith)

scars (that happen to be on their backs)

their relationship with Squirrel (both protective, not smothering)

Symbols of their side in war (WM is the monk’s best fighter, N is their queen)

I’m sure people can give you more reasons. This is just what I came up with on the spot after one watch through of the series. If you have others, please write them below, I’m curious. 

Now onto the topic that I find to be atrocious: 

Predator: 

-EXCUSE ME, a predator prays on others. How on God’s green earth is WM that? He was a literal sword for hire/raised to fight against his kind through mental strain from this messed up ideology of christianity. 

-And for those calling his relationship with Squirrel unhealthy... fair point but I’m not done yet. 

-I don’t mean all this to say that what he did under the red monks was good or even acceptable. No it wasn’t, the dude was practicing mass genocide of his own race, that’s fucked up. (That torture scene in front of the mill was really something)

-But as we learn in later episodes, all of his actions linger on not being damed and going to heaven (I assume) as seen in the scene when we got a nice look of him shirtless while he was having a moral crisis.

-Speaking of moral crisis, did you notice that he had one when the rest of the villains present in this show do not? Even Iris (a fantastic villain) had a tragic backstory with her family like WM, but rather than question her motives, she starts on the villain path. 

-Now while I do admit he doesn’t treat Squirrel right in the beginning, it makes sense for his character and where he is at. Not to say that hurting a child and using him as a pawn to kill leftover tribe members is justified. 

-But the writers always wrote the interactions between Squirrel and WM with a hint of humor. Squirrel was always talking back, calling WM and his horse ugly, and even hissing out “you” in front of the red monks. All this going on while WM maintains a blank expression, that to viewers is almost comical (because it breaks away from the sad emo boy cliche) 

-In the end, WM needed someone like Squirrel to get out of the disastrous rut the red monks had WM in. For WM to start on this journey of his (that I’m sure will continue through season 2) he needed to show he had a moral code. 

-Also, like many complicated characters, WM never thought through the damage he has done and how his work impacted children up until G called him out for it. For this reason, I think G had just as much a part of getting WM to revolt as Squirrel did. 

- I think his relationship with Squirrel will continue to grow into a more protective association now that G is dead. G made Squirrel into a knight, the next step is for this kid to train like one. Who better than Mr. Lancelot himself. (They better have a training scene in next season or I will riot)

-And lastly, all of you who know the lore of Lancelot understand that he will become the best of the best and also the most loyal and chivalrous knight out there. What a better way to love a character with these attributes than if he started in the proverbial gutter and grows to understand and value these characteristics?  It’s the shiny ending that he needs to work hard to achieve and that is what, at the end of the day, all lovers of WM want to see in the next few seasons. 

Him becoming that knight in shining armor.

[fromthedeskofthecaptain]

For anyone who would like to know the contents of the Ghosts Empire Spoiler Special, I’ve summarized the discussion below.

There are two episodes, both centered on series 2, excluding the Christmas special. The first is Martha, Ben and Larry and the second is with Matt and Jim (and is better in terms of how deep they go into characterization and the writing process). I’ll skip the bits that are just chatter.

I’m not going to transcribe it all, but I’ll spend a few posts talking about the key points. I’ll do the second one first, because it’s the richest.

Writing process-

Storylining is done half a series at a time as a big group and then who writes each episode depends on availability and not being engaged on other projects. People will often write an episode because the plot was their idea, but it can work out that they write up an episode based on someone else’s outline.

They knew they wanted to show characters going against type - angry Pat and vulnerable Captain - and that they wanted to explore love between the Ghosts. They wanted to show humanity, add complexity and depth to characters and allow a range of movement into the present and the past. It was harder to write than Yonderland because there isn’t a new character with an “adventure of the week”.

Episode 1 -

The original idea for Pat’s DJ spot was that he would give an intro to Dexy’s Midnight Runners “Come on Eileen” and hum the first few bars, but it turned out to be £1000s to obtain the rights. Jim was so thrilled that it got such a laugh in rehearsal he considered paying himself. They tried a few others (2,4, 6, 8 Motorway) and then Jim improvised “Chicken and Chips” thinking he’d have a lot more tries, but Tom Kingsley moved them on before he could.

(Btw, they had no problems getting Kylie to agree to use of “I Should be so Lucky” because she loves the show! Music Club presented the same problem of having to ask for clearance and pay. Apparently there’s no standardized system so they had to think of something and ask, rather than picking from options with a price list.)

Episode 2 -

They came up with Dante’s plot to give Alison some way of moving through the house and interacting with everyone. They went with the Ghosts natural reactions to partying. Pat was conflicted between fun and the right thing. The plague ghosts and Mick giving everyone the plague was based on a play Matt was in years ago about a village where this happened.

They structured the episode by using the principle “what’s the worst thing that could happen next?” a la Curb Your Enthusiasm and thought the answer was the plague ghosts coming upstairs and there had to be a cause of that. The archaeologist was a good person to deal with the question of how is it they’ve just found out what Mick did.

Mary x Robin came from them thinking someone would end up having some intimacy with someone in hundreds of years without much stimulation or any other people, or even things, to touch. They joked about everyone having had ghost sex(!!) with everyone else at one point. (Editor’s note: I can’t really see this. Kitty doesn’t know what it is, Cap and Fanny are too uncomfortable with it so that leaves Julian, Thomas, Humphrey and Pat, who I suspect is too loyal to his wife).

Episode 4 - The Thomas Thorne Affair

There was an awareness that Thomas’s character could become a “one note joke” with no capacity for development. Jim described him as potentially like Pepe Le Pew. Matt asked Charlotte how she felt about the sameness of some of their interactions. They thought about having Alison just lay down the law as it were, but that would change who he was too much. They needed to “play the same tune with a different dynamic” in Thomas’s arc. They considered making his character a peeping Tom, but thought that would bore everyone quickly.

Episode 4’s plot structure came about because they wanted to promote the unreliable narrator idea. They knew some ghosts would have witnessed Thomas’s death and that, plus familiarity with characters, let them play with the format. Matt didn’t want to have the flashbacks to deaths to be done the same way each time. Pat’s in series 1 was obvious because he “wears his death” (Jim). Jim did an improv of Pat’s death in the writer’s room when they first had the idea of how he died. It worked because although it’s quite horrific, the audience knows he’s ok, in a sense, afterwards, so it can be comedic too.

Matt felt a bit guilty about being front and centre of the story he wrote. The unifying thread was Mike and Alison’s issues with truth / perspective. His death also establishes that some ghosts are present at others deaths.

They developed Thomas by writing about why he is as he is. Matt thinks that because Thomas died “heartbroken and fixated” Mary’s observation that “you stays how you dies” is psychologically true, too. They always knew he died in a duel over a woman, but elaborated it to include dying thinking he’d been abandoned. He transferred this state of unrequited obsession onto Alison. Thomas can’t cope with Robin’s point, re monogamy, about what would he do if both Isobel and Alison were alive.

They still aren’t sure if he’s a good poet - they wrote it so we know it’s bad BUT he can believe it’s good and the audience within the show are a bit confused about whether it’s just confidently delivered rubbish or not. They think he’s capable of good work but gets too caught up in his fixed ideas of what being a good poet is and tries too hard (the implication being that this blocks genuine creativity/ originality). His vulnerability is quite charming (Matt).

The idea of the cousin betrayal was thought up once they started. The first idea was just that Thomas tells a story and others interject to say it wasn’t like that and Kitty would tell her version which the audience would know to be true because she has no guile. The contrast was originally just in Thomas’s grand passion cruelly interrupted story versus the actuality of a not very good poet being deluded about a random woman who barely knew who he was. The twist of the cousin was a spark in the writers room that everyone was immediately excited about and that matches Thomas’s sense of the melodramatic.

(As an aside, they always knew there were different groups of people in the house before the Buttons and intended to use that to explore other stories and characters throughout history.)

Matt is a bit embarrassed that they didn’t really have space to give Francis a proper motivation for orchestrating his cousin’s death. They put in a bit about him appreciating Button House and added a line from Thomas - “don’t embarrass me, cousin” - to suggest perhaps Thomas bullied him a bit. They thought about giving Francis lines about having gambling debts to create an urgent need to marry into money, but that made it too obvious that Francis was a bad guy.

To be continued...

[phoenixhalliwell]

You are my sunshine

Pairings:  Benny Miller  X Gender Neutral Reader

Word count: 900

Author's Note: Hi everyone, as some of you may know today is World mental health day. I've been struggling with my mental health a lot the past little while but haven't been able to express how I'm feeling to anyone. So I decided to write it out instead and it turns out it's actually quite therapeutic. Descriptions in this fic are based slightly on my own experiences and I hope that I don't negatively affect anyone who happens to read this. I  just really needed to get it off my chest.

If there is anyone out there who reads this and like myself is struggling to talk to their friends and family members, feel free to drop me a message. Sometimes it helps to talk to a stranger.

Just know  - It's ok to not be ok, please don't be so hard on yourself <3

Hope you guys don’t mind the tags:

@cinewhore @artemiseamoon @adikaofmandalore @agirllovespancakes

@writefightandflightclub @sheerfreesia007 @veuliee2 @dignityneeded @shakespeareanwannabe @abuttoncalledsmalls

All it takes is the smashing of the glass on the floor to finally break your composure. Tears prickle in your eyes and the feeling of despair washes over you.

' you can't do anything right can you?'

It's as though all the strings holding your body up have been cut and you sink to your knees landing heavily on the floor. It doesn't matter how hard you try, you just can't seem to stop making a mess of things. A sob bubbles up in your chest, everything suddenly feels overwhelming.

You've been feeling off for the past little while but you always brushed it off whenever Benny asked you is bothering you.

"It's nothing Ben, I'm fine. Don't worry " you would smile and reassure him. You can see he's not convinced though. He keeps subtly hinting at maybe going to see someone to talk things out with. He's more than willing to be that person to listen to you but he doesn't think you will open up to him about what's wrong.

But that's the thing, you don't know what exactly IS wrong, you can't seem to put your finger on it and you don't want to waste anyone's time complaining.

It started off with little things. A loud noise seemed to be amplified tenfold causing you to feel overwhelmed. Your patience wearing thin easily and you end up snapping at any poor unfortunate soul. There are days when it feels a little harder to smile.  You find it difficult to motivate yourself to do the things you usually love to do.

Other days there this restlessness inside you that makes you feel uneasy. You constantly have to move or you think you're going to vibrate out of your skin. By the end of the day you are drained but when it's finally time to sleep you can't shut your head off.

It's exhausting.

It's the nights however that are the worst. That's when the little dark thought would creep in and whisper awful things that make you doubt yourself. It's also when this feeling of unbearable sadness hits you the hardest. You don't understand why it's there inside you though. You have everything you could possibly want! A good job, a beautiful home, a husband who you love more than life itself who would do everything in his power to make you happy. So why do you feel so sad?

'It's because you are ungrateful, nothing is ever going to be good enough for you is it?' A little voice whispers.

'What the fuck is wrong with you?'

It feels like someone is squeezing the air out of you and you claw at the top buttons of your shirt, gasping. The cruel little whispers seem to get louder and louder. All you want is for everything to be quiet. You feel like you're drowing.

But a voice breaks through, a low soothing  voice that is so much kinder than the others.

"Shhh sweetheart, it's ok. I'm here, I've got you"

You're not sure how long it takes but when you come back to yourself, he's the first thing you see.

Benny. Your saving grace. Your light in the darkness. You've never been so grateful for him.

You're lying across his lap on the kitchen floor and he cradles you to his chest like you're the most precious thing in the world. You don't deserve the smile he sends your way.

"Hi baby" he says with a soft smile looking down at you. He wipes the tears from your cheeks before he traces a finger gently over your brow and down the bridge of your nose in an attempt of comfort.

"I made a mess. I'm sorry" You whispered, looking away from him ashamed. A gentle hand turns your face back towards him.

" None of that baby. It was an accident, as long as you're ok nothing else matters. Tell me what you need sweetheart, let me take care of you. "

" Can we just sit here for a while. Please?" you asked tiredly.

"Anything you want baby"

He tucks your head under his chin and wraps his arms tighter around you. You burrow into his warmth, breathe in his scent and try to let all the negative thoughts in your head go. Somehow just him being here manages to quieten the voices. He begins to sing quietly to you and sways you both lightly side to side. It takes you a beat to place the song and a smile creeps up on your face when you realise what it is.

"....my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey...."

You feel warm.  Safe. Loved. For the first time in what feels like forever you feel like you can breathe properly. It's his husky voice and the way he gently rubs up and down your back that eventually has you dozing. Maybe tomorrow you might look into finding someone to talk to about all these confusing feelings. You know it's not going to be an easy task, but hopefully you can find peace.

Just for this moment though you are content to sit here on this kitchen floor with your hero.  His arms wrapped around you like a shield and keeping your monsters at bay.  The last thing you hear before sleep takes you is him whisper into your hair.

"I love you baby"

[traincat]

I’ve been trying to piece together a few things from your Twitter and Tumblr posts alike and still can’t make heads or tales of things, so would you mind helping out a FF & spideytorch noob? 1) what is currently happening with Johnny in the comics? (I’ve fallen head over heels for this guy, largely all your doing) 2) when’s the last time he and Peter have interacted, canon wise? (And do you think upcoming interactions are likely?) 3) your thoughts on if they’ll have him come out in the near future? (has that ‘biggest change to the fantastic four’ teaser come to pass yet?) Love all your content, thank you!

I'd say no problem but then I started thinking about this current run again and got a headache. But yes, I can do that to save you from reading it, because it is very largely not good.

So I don't think it's unfair to just flat out say the current Fantastic Four run is not very good, largely due to writer Dan Slott's efforts. Slott was previously on Amazing Spider-Man for 10 years, to mixed opinions, but a large portion of Spider-Man fandom, myself included, blames him near singlehandedly for the decline in quality of Spider-Man books over those ten years. I will say, in the interest of fairness, that Slott as a writer has an incredible fondness for the Spider-Man/Human Torch relationship, and that a lot of the recent teamups and interactions between them have been written or co-written by him. So it's all not all negative here. But in general, I personally find Slott's more recent comics (the last seven-ish years especially) to be badly plotted out, messily characterized disasters that feature characters written with all the emotion of a cardboard cutout. That's me putting it nicely.

To explain this fully, you have to understand the position Fantastic Four comics were in from the years 2015 through 2018, both in the fictional 616 universe and in the real publishing world. Following the 2015 Secret Wars event (great if you want some Johnny angst in the background of your plot), the Fantastic Four were disbanded -- Reed, Sue, and their many biological and found family children were presumed dead but in reality were remaking the multiverse, unable, for a reason that was never clearly defined, to reach home. Ben and Johnny were left on Earth. They had an unspecified falling out, likely due to Reed and Sue's absence, and went their separate ways -- Ben joined the Guardians of the Galaxy and went to space. Johnny was featured on both Inhumans and Avengers books. What's notable about this period is that it's the first time since 1961 that there was no Fantastic Four book being published by Marvel. Now the real world reason behind this is both complicated and extremely petty: Marvel really wanted the Fantastic Four film rights. Marvel denied this explanation at the time, stating that the reason was sales motivated, but it was a thoroughly flimsy excuse and Jonathan Hickman, writer of 2015's Secret Wars and overseer of the current X-Men plot, gave an interview saying the decision was film rights motivated. This decision kept the Fantastic Four books off the shelves for three years, up until the Disney-Fox merger, which secured the X-Men and Fantastic Four rights for Disney's Marvel Studios. Marvel then announced that the Fantastic Four book would be returning. So that's a little bit of background as to the precarious place the Fantastic Four currently occupy in the Marvel universe -- it's worth noting that this year is their 60th anniversary, and Marvel has done very little for it. Compare this to the X-Men, whose film rights Marvel also obtained during the Disney-Fox merger, and whose books are currently dominating the publishing lineup. The Fantastic Four definitely occupy an unpopular position, one Marvel themselves is at least partially responsible for forcing them into.

But to move back into the actual content of the book -- the readjustment period Slott wrote reintroducing the Fantastic Four into the Marvel universe can be described as clumsy, at best. It's never fully explained why Reed, Sue, and the kids couldn't return to Earth, something that was explored in Chip Zdarsky's 2017 Marvel Two-in-One, which featured Ben, Johnny, and Doom on a multiversal roadtrip to try and find their family and which I on the whole recommend, despite it having an awkward ending due to being cut short by Slott's announced Fantastic Four main title.

(Marvel Two-in-One 2017 #4)

Instead, the Fantastic Four return to a Marvel universe a little different than how they left it, with the Baxter Building -- formerly the offices of Parker Industries, the company Doc Ock started in Peter's body during Superior Spider-Man that Peter inherited after his defeat and then lost spectacularly when he trashed his own company to fight nazis (good for him) -- occupied by a different fantastic foursome in a plot that goes nowhere and does nothing. This is somewhat emblematic of the early days of Slott's run -- he introduces ideas that fail to go anywhere, including Johnny's rekindled relationship with his other best friend and former college roommate, Wyatt Wingfoot, who he was seen being very cuddly with in the early issues.

(FF 2018 #1) A small group of Fantastic Four fans have argued for a while that if Marvel was to have Johnny come out, a relationship with Wyatt would feel very natural -- they're already close, with Wyatt being an important Fantastic Four supporting character since the '60s. I have some further analysis here on the conspiracy theory that Johnny and Wyatt were supposed to be in relationship at the beginning of this run but that that plot was, for whatever reason, nixed. I don't know that I entirely believe this theory, for the record -- but I do think the pieces line up remarkably well.

Anyway, that didn't/hasn't yet happened, obviously. Slott instead for the most part put Johnny on the back burner for the beginning of his run, up until the Spyre arc, which I have reason to believe is the main story he pitched that he credits with securing him the Fantastic Four title. The Spyre arc suggests that the Fantastic Four's failed space exploration during which they got their powers wasn't just to beat the commies to the moon, as Lee and Kirby envisioned (simpler days), but to reach a specific planet outside of our galaxy. When the team sets out to conquer this mission, they arrive at the planet, but are quickly captured. The planet, they find out, operates like a soulmate AU -- everyone has a fated person that they are matched to via a gold armband. Reed and Sue are soulmates (and Ben is confined to an underground subterranean with the other monsters, because this is a Fantastic Four comic) while it's discovered! Shocker! That Johnny is actually the soulmate of the one the planet's inhabitants, a winged woman named Sky, with the suggestion that this is both why Johnny's previous relationships have never worked and why he loves space exploration -- he was just trying to get to his Soulmate TM.

(FF 2018 #15) "What's going on here? Where are my clothes?" As you can see, this didn't start off super great, with Johnny being separated from his family, stripped naked, and put in Sky's bed with a soulmate armband slapped on him. Did I mention they're only removable if your soulmate takes it off for you? And that Sky has consistently refused despite Johnny asking her to? Yeah. It's bad. (I think it's important to note Johnny's long history as a victim of assault plays into this narrative, whether or not Slott is personally holding that in mind while writing, which I don't believe he is. cw in the linked post for discussions of sexual assault.) There's an additional issue here in that Slott has a history of problematic writing regarding women of color, featuring characters he's created to act as love interests being oversexualized, infantilized, villainized, or some mix of all three, with two examples of this phenomena being Cindy Moon and Lian Tang, both of whom he introduced in quick succession in Amazing Spider-Man. Slott certainly didn't have to write Sky as manipulative or controlling towards Johnny, but that's what he chose to do, and that factors into the bigger picture of unfortunate themes in his writing.

Sky returns to Earth with the Fantastic Four despite Johnny appearing unenthused about the idea and initially generally reluctant to interact with her. Apparently they went on a few dates after this and kind of made up. I don't know because I stopped reading for about ten issues in there but I feel confident I missed very little. It's hard to talk about the Sky plot without referencing Johnny's previous interactions with a character named Lyja, a Skrull whose relationship to Johnny I have a long breakdown of here. It's doubly hard, because Lyja actually showed back up in Fantastic Four during this plot. Lyja's modus operandi has remained consistent throughout almost all of her appearances, which I guess makes sense, because she literally has no storylines that do not involve her being obsessed with Johnny, and this recent story isn't any different: Lyja shows up, Lyja disguises herself as another woman in Johnny's life to get close to Johnny, Lyja gets caught and claims it was all fine because she did it for love. This time she disguised herself as Sky.

(FF 2018 #32) Not gonna lie, kind of proud of him for this one. That's one of my problems with Slott -- very occasionally, he busts out good moments, only to undermine them with the rest of his narrative.

In the same issue, Alicia Masters, the first woman Lyja impersonated in order to get close to Johnny, uses her supervillain stepfather's radioactive clay to control Lyja's mind and send her back to space, and I do think she utilized girl power when she did this. Johnny, left reeling after Lyja's latest attempts to trick him into a relationship, ends this issue by sleeping with Victorious, Dr. Doom's right hand woman.

I know she pegged him. I know it. This scene was a little controversial in Johnny fandom, because a lot of people viewed it as Johnny cheating on Sky and thought that that action was out of character for Johnny. I'm personally of a little different opinion, which is that regardless of whether or not you view Johnny and Sky in a committed enough relationship that Johnny's tryst would count as infidelity when all Johnny and Sky are bound by are magic plot soulmate bracelets, I think Lyja's involvement changes things significantly when it comes to Johnny's characterization. All of Johnny's "playboy" periods, if we can call them that, coincide directly with Lyja having been in and then left his life again, which I think makes a certain amount of sense -- it's Johnny trying to wrest control back after a situation where he had none. None of this is explicitly canon, I have to note, but sometimes in comics you have to do the work yourself. So I think this is a case of something being accidentally extremely in character that Slott accidentally stumbled into because he had these love triangles in mind, not because he put a lot of thought into it.

Speaking of love triangles! Johnny sleeping with Victorious gets more complicated when Dr. Doom announces his intent to marry Victorious -- not because he has any romantic interest in her (this engagement caused a lot of uproar in Fantastic Four because Victorious had been previously referred to as being like Doom's adopted daughter) but in order to install her as Latverian regent in his absence. I'm not going to lie, I love a political wedding. Victorious, for some reason, thinks Doom will be deeply upset that she slept with some closeted blond twink and the member of the Fantastic Four he views least as an enemy and more as an annoyance. Johnny, who Sky is currently not talking to because she "felt" him sleeping with Victorious through their magic plot soulmate bracelets, also feels nervous about Doom finding out about this, which I guess is slightly more valid. Anyway, for some completely ridiculous reason, Victorious decides the best time to tell Doom about this little indiscretion is when they're standing at the altar, which coincidentally the Fantastic Four are also standing at, because Doom asked Reed to be his best man in a not at all homoerotic little setup involving midnight swordfighting and Reed slipping Doom's emerald ring onto his own finger. Sorry to sidetrack into DoomReed territory here but it's just like. It's just a lot.

(FF 2018 #33) Also, Ben walked the bride down the aisle. :,) Look at his gigantic hand.

Anyway then Doom decides he's going to kill everyone in a completely reasonable and not at all overblown reaction to Johnny and Zora having what was most likely both disappointing for Zora and weepy for Johnny sex. And that brings us up to where Fantastic Four comics left us yesterday -- in answer to your "big change" question, that's most likely coming up in the next issue, so it hasn't come to pass yet.

Having gotten all that out of the way -- the last time Johnny and Peter interacted canon-wise was in the recent Empyre Fallout Fantastic Four, at the end of the Empyre event:

It was cute! Slott does right good interactions between them. This is possibly the Stockholm Syndrome talking. I don't know if more interactions are likely imminent -- the Empyre event was fairly recent. On the other hand, Slott does like writing interactions between them. So I'd give it about a 50/50 shot. I was skimming the letter page in the latest issue and someone wrote in asking if Peter was likely to appear in the pages of Fantastic Four again any time soon, so there is definitely a demand.

As for Johnny coming out -- I don't know. It's not a call I feel comfortable making at this moment, which I guess means I wouldn't bet money on it. I'd like to say yes, especially because I think Slott set up, whether that was his intention or more likely not, several good places in his run where Johnny could have come out. The beginning, when he's implied to be living with Wyatt again and where he and Wyatt are paralleled against Ben and Alicia. Ben's bachelor party, where Johnny laments not finding the right person -- specifically person and not woman -- and where Ben tells him to "be brave, Johnny Storm." And the soulmate planet plot, where I think could have had a very different and much better ending if Johnny had told Sky that she couldn't be his romantic soulmate, because he knows he wants to be with a man. But those are just places that I think would have made good opportunities for a coming out story. Instead, Johnny's been involved (dubiously) with three different women over the space of the last 10 issues, which is more heterosexuality at one time than he's been confronted with in the last 60 years. So my thoughts are still that it's going to happen eventually, but quite possibly not anytime soon.

Hope that helps! And that my incredibly long answer about what's currently going on with Johnny in comics sheds some light on things!

[sityoursiredassdown]

General Shadow and Bone Thoughts

From someone who binge-watched it in nearly one sitting. Spoilers below!

I have to give it to the writers of this show, they adapted the story and characters so well and honestly changed some for the better. 

I guess I’m now a true multishipper??? Because the show actually made me enjoy Malina???

That being said Darklina still has my heart 

But for real I was someone that did not like Mal in the books and therefor struggled to root for Alina to end up with him, but the subtle changes to his personality in not judging her for enjoying being Grisha or being drawn to the Darkling. As well as showing what he was doing in the narrative and how he feels was a good touch, since in the books we only get Alina’s POV. I hope they stick with it as they adapt book 2. 

Every Kanej scene had me on the floor because Freddy and Amita brought their damn A-game, bravo. Not a single touch and I was riveted. 

I wish we got to see more Helnik but what was shown was so! good! 

Also wish we could have had another episode or two so we really saw Alina enjoy and thrive as a Grisha, because discovering she liked her powers was such an important thing for her in the books. 

idk why they changed the plot point of the Darkling telling Alina about getting her a stag amplifier to him not wanting her to have an amplifier, probably to make his motives feel more hidden. I can respect that. 

Also on the Darkling. We got some backstory!! That was a treat I was not expecting, bless. 

Every time the crows interacted with characters from the trilogy I felt like I was reading a fanfiction cross-over come to life but IN THE BEST WAY.

The differing reactions to Alina made perfect sense and it created such an interesting conflict between three people that are pretty damn tight. 

Jesper is a disaster bisexual and honestly, same. 

Also those hints of his backstory is just *chef’s kiss* 

The show did a great job of making smaller side characters feel fleshed out. (RIP, Mikael and Dubrov. And Marie) 

Nina is BLACK!!! Love everything about it. 

The actresses for both Zoya and Genya are just??? perfection??? They’re so pretty I wanna cry tbh. 

Honestly did not expect the Conductor to betray the crows, like I was genuinely surprised. Good thing Kaz is better at reading people. 

I nearly had a heart attack when Kaz was one on one with the Darkling even though I knew he’d be fine. 

I may have ended up back on the floor when Aleksander ran back to kiss Alina again one more time in the war room. 

Honestly Ben Barnes plays him to perfection and the fact he looks so constantly in awe any time he’s near Alina is the content I signed up for. (Okay I’m done simping I’M SORRY) 

But honestly I only like a handful of villains, let alone hero/villain ships LET ME HAVE THIS 

Alina going absolutely feral in fights is also content I signed up for. Baby girl is not a push over and GOOD FOR HER. 

Inej landing a blow on the Darkling when no one else could in the final battle when no one else could was iconic. 

SPEAKING OF INEJ.

Her first kill??? to save Kaz??? I was shook and enthralled and I thank the writers for their service. 

Also Kaz joining the fight on the skiff to protect Inej also left me wrecked. 

Like I said all their scenes were just next level. 

idk why but I kept snickering each time Mal and the Darkling hit each other in the last episode.  

But also Archie does a great job of making Mal have a presence when going against the Darkling so their stand-offs don’t feel contrived. He and Ben played off each other superbly. 

Just. All the ships are cute. Everyone’s got fantastic chemistry. I’m not choosing anymore and no one can make me.  

There is probably a bunch of stuff that I missed and I definitely have my shipper biases but this show was so damn enjoyable that I had to get my thoughts out in a ramble. 

Here’s hoping for season 2! Lets get Nikolai and Wylan up in this bitch! 

[katyobsesses]

I've decided to do that fic ask thing that's been floating around even though I haven't been tagged <3

how many works do you have on AO3?

22... apparently? three of those are fic book covers though.

what’s your total AO3 word count?

139,883 words

how many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

On AO3? 3. In general? 4 or 5 i think? I currently write for Glee and Marvel on my AO3 (there's also one Yuri On Ice fic) and I've previously written (and published) for Harry Potter on FF.Net. I do also have a few outlines/ideas for Merlin fics floating around my google docs but I've never posted any, and I used to write Twilight fics back in the day.

what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Ain't No Grave (Can Keep My Body Down) Book Cover with 222 kudos (Marvel published 2016) --A book cover for a popular Stucky fic

A Punch In The Face with 101 kudos (Marvel published 2014) --A Young Avengers drabble of sorts, Teddy/Billy meet cute

Express Your Love with 81 kudos (Marvel published 2014) --I cannot remember what this is, I think it's Stony? Something about Tony never saying 'I Love You' to steve but instead showing his love through actions?

In A Previous Life with 77 kudos (Marvel published 2014) --A drabble of sorts. Billy and Tommy talk to Wanda about their life with her before they were reincarnated.

Putting a Punching Bag in the Workshop was Tony's Best Idea Ever with 64 kudos (Marvel published 2014) --Basically what it says on the tin. Stony. Tony is distracted by Steve's arse as he boxes.

Annoyingly these are all fics I'm not that proud of, but they're older so the kudos amounts make sense i guess 🙄 the next most Kudos'd is one I am proud of though - “You took EVERYTHING from me.” with 58 Kudos (2019) - Basically a little oneshot of what I thought could have happened in the 5 years everyone was dusted and how I thought they might have introduced Billy and Tommy into the MCU, it was going to create a whole 'verse but then we got confirmation on things like Kate Bishop and Cassie Lang and Spiderman Far From Home came out and I dropped the ideas. But I still like this fic.

do you respond to comments, why or why not?

most of the time, yes, though sometimes I leave them sitting for too long and then feel awkward about replying to them and i don't (*cough* most of my comments on WTNY(ibwfy) *cough*)

what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

probably In Paris With You which I'd forgotten about until scrolling through my fics! I wrote this, orginally, way back in like... 2011 based on a poem of the same name that got stuck in my head as i studied it for my English GCSE. but it's been updated and changed like 3 times since then.

Also my fic As long as I'm here as I am, so are you is rather angsty. Basically Kurt is listening to Ben Platt's album Sing to Me Instead and one song reminds him of Finn. (because it reminded me of them)

do you write crossovers? if so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I've never written a crossover, though I think I once toyed around with some sort of Harry Potter crossover that never made the light of day, I can't remember what it was with though... maybe Merlin?

have you ever received hate on a fic?

not on AO3! But I did have someone call my OC in One More New Direction a Mary Sue on FF.net which wasn't nice, and someone else said they hated my characterisation of Mercedes in a chapter which was weird because Mercedes wasn't even in the chapter it was just my OC talking about her and her impression of her.

do you write smut? if so what kind?

I've tried, multiple times, in my 10+ years of fic writing, but i just can't do it. Maybe it's because I'm Asexual? it just always feels weird even after I've read smut as, like, revision. I feel like a lot of the characters are, like, ace by proxy because i don't know how to write characters being motivated by sex.

have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope! Not that I know of anyway

have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope!

have you ever co-written a fic before?

not that I remember? I vaguely remember being a Beta for someone like 10 years ago though.

what’s your all time favourite ship?

I honestly don't know! I've definately written mostly Klaine, but I'm such a multishipper that I have no clue. I'm really loving writing Hevans rn mostly because we are lacking Hevans content which is criminal. actually, fun fact, my fic Welcome To New York (it's been waiting for you) was originally going to be Klaine, but as i was writing the outline I fell back into the Hevans hole and decided to switch it up. I'm glad i did because it would have gotten nowhere as a Klaine fic!

what’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

If i don't think I'll finish something I don't post it. I have a graveyard of fics half drafted.

what are your writing strengths?

I honestly don't know. I like writing dialogue and I know I'm good at portraying something with a small amount of words but you'll have to ask my readers 😊 (in fact, if you've read my stuff please let me know what you think my strengths are! I'm honestly curious!)

what are your writing weaknesses?

I'm terrible at stretching a scene into something bigger if it warrents it. Like i said I'm good at portraying something with few words but sometimes I feel like that throws the pacing off. I use a lot of paragraphs because of that, to make the reader pause and reflect until the next line or to show that the character is pausing and reflecting. idk man. I also hate writing dates, which is annoying because WYNY(ibwfy) is mostly dates. I've been on one in my life and it was shit so i have no idea how to write one lol.

what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I think that, unless you don't want the reader to know what is being said or the words used are obvious in context, that you should write it in english EG: --"Merci!" Kurt said.-- is fine but if you want to write something longer I would do something like --"hello my name is Kurt Hummel and I love scarfs" Kurt said in french-- or something, it depends on the context.

Actually, going back to In Paris With You. Kurt is french in that, and it's from Blaine's POV so when Kurt speaks french it's in french with Blaine translating what he can in the narration. He's not meant to be able to understand Kurt perfectly, so the audience doesn't either. But if I was writing, say, Kurt and Sebastian talking to each other in French from Kurt's POV I'd write it in english so that audience can also understand that Kurt understands.

(does that make sense?)

what was the first fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter. definately Harry Potter! It was how i got into fanfiction, and how i got into glee <3 JKR is a horrible person, but her books - and especially the fandom surrounding them - mean a lot to me.

what’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

I have no idea. I'm really liking my Love and Friendship series right now, and I love One More New Direction because it got me through - is getting me through - this crazy couple of years. so probably them? I also really love (that makes you) The Scarlet Witch which is kind of like a character analysis of Wanda that I wrote after watching WandaVision.

[juniaships]

Actiontoongorlz's Top 8 Canon x OC Ships 💖💖

I've been looking at OTP/Couples memes for a while and decided that it's time for me to make my own! For an extra surprise I'm not putting Ben Tennyson x Jora Holiday on this list because I focus too much on them anyways & I want my other OCs & their loves to have the spotlight for a change. The timing couldn't be more perfect as we're close to Valentine's Day!!! If you don't support canon x oc or find my ships displeasing then move along because this is a Happy Place! 😁😁 Again these are couples that I consider my personal OTPs in regards to canon x oc. That and making more content with my ships in general! Be warned the text is long and contains spoilers for certain shows and such!!

Clarify: these are my own ocs so there's not going to be anyone else's oc/canon. I might have to save that for another post in the future! 💚 But yeah these are characters that I came up with :]

Alright I'm done ranting, let's get started!

1. Sonic x Lani: I never quite gave much thought into this pair as I should so I promise to do something with them in the future! I promise! What I appreciate about SonLani is that there's little drama, like everything is super chill because both parties are chill. It's not a big deal and they don't need grand gestures to show how much they care about each other. Unlike Preboot Archie with its carts full of poorly written romance and strangely OOC moments on Sonic's end, SonLani had a lot of time to grow, while keeping his established personality in check. They actually communicate with each other, and stick by each other thick and thin. Lani loves Sonic for who he is & has no plans on changing him. Likewise Sonic has someone he can rely on when things get tough; not to mention he can really be himself around her without going all "iLl sLOw dOWn fOr U." Plus the ship name I gave them is a huge nod to the games ^_^

2. Jason x Vanessa: A recent pair due to Vanessa being a new creation but I'm honestly in love with them right now. In-universe they are regarded as the prime example of 'Opposites Attract' in Odyssey. They didn't get along very well in Jason's first couple of months in town due to his hardheaded self and her aloof demeanor. But through events such as Blackgaard and Novacom they gradually learn to trust one another. They see each other in a different light, Vanessa realising that Jason is a lot more thoughtful than he lets on, and Jason discovering her hidden fun side and kindness. Vanessa provides challenges and a sense of normalcy Jason can enjoy away from spy business. Meanwhile Jason fulfills her thirst of adventure & simultaneous desire for a peaceful life as well as spirituality. They're a equals, regarding each other as such and not to mention the BANTER! Hard to believe a former nun can keep up with a secret agent both physically and trading barbs XD. There's also the Forbidden Love factor of Vanessa being the duaghter of Regis Blackgaard, Jason defending her because he KNOWS she is nothing like her old man. Their friendship and romance overcome so many obstacles. I can honestly say that if Vanessa was canon she'd be the type of person Jason would like to be with especially over Jillian Marshall *gags*

3. Kaysha Wallace x Leo Hamato: Now here's a ship that I want to get more into 😁😁 Honestly I love the idea of this pairing: the serious leadee x bubbly spirit! Kaysha is very perky yet understands Leo's feelings on shouldering so much responsibility (she being the oldest child in her family). She's very willing to support him because she doesn't want to see him get all weary from burden. Likewise Leo can be himself around her, and teach her to be more responsible. He doesn't doubt her potential and sees her as an equal even during those periods where she was not on par with the other ninja. Kaysha shows Leo it's okay to relax and let other people help him out and not shut everyone out. When Leo expresses his ability to give her a safe life she simply laughs it off; the way she sees it him simply there in her life is enough. The most interesting facet is their dynamic varies between shows, so you'd see different scenarios and reactions as well as similarities and differences in their romance subplot.

4. Artie x Rhodanthe: Another couple I seriously need to give more attention to, they're meant to be is the foil to Shrek and Fiona in several ways. Artie and Rho may come from different social classes but they're both searching for a purpose to prove their haters wrong. Artie lacked confidence while Rho was overconfident believing she didn't need help. Together Artie learns to stand up for not only for his kingdom and loved ones hut also for himself; Rho's pride gets tempered by Artie's kindness and willingness to compromise. Another thing I like is that Artie has someone who loves him for him not because he is attractive and of royal blood. Likewise Rho has someone who respects her in spite of her social standing & shares her beliefs in making life easier for the poor & outcasts. While both lacke the physical prowess of Shrek and Fiona they rely on each other's resourcefulness and strategic thinking to get by. Unlike Shrek and Fiona they don't get married at the end of their focus movie, resolving to figure out where to take their relationship next. They still have their own life goals and don't want to rush into a relationship which sends a pretty good message. However they have their disagreements - in fact they got a huge argument that became a plot point in Shrek Forever After - but through it all they rediscover the things that made them fall in true love with each other. I'm really loving the subplot I have planned where they forget their memories and slowly fall back in love again.

5. Finn x Alma: Surprise! Yes8 I have a Cars OC (that was originally a fanon Disney Princess) who is the niece of Tow Mater in my verse and she enters a relationship with Finn McMissile. The thing I love about this pair is that it allows Alma to use her skills to flourish, treating amd healing injured spies. She's also into travel and adventure so she can pretty much keep up with Finn. Likewise Finn realizes she is more than just a pretty face or a one-off fling but someone with the passion to face challenges head on; Finn seems to love a good challenge! But overall they'd make a nice pairing, Finn showing Alma the world and Alma showing Finn some of the more simpler things in life.

6. Alexander Paine & Qiu Jin: Well well well look at what the cat dragged in? If it isn't our first villain pairing? XD Just kidding only one half is a genuine villain. What makes this couple so unique in that their storyline goes way back to before the events of the show, he being a agent and she a mechanic. They loved each other deeply, even to the point of starting a family, but forced apart due to some troubling events. When they do get back together it's not so much a bittersweet reunion as Paine became a full villain and Qiu Jin had spent years in&out mental institution before being released There's visible pain & regret, Alexander desperately wanting a semblance of what they once had. He seeks power not just for himself for to heal her. But Jin refuses to go along with his schemes wanting nothing more than to move on and see their children. Jin is a huge Mortality Pet for him, but his own selfish desires for power is a major obstacle their love can't overcome. It's the more bittersweet of my pairings but an important one nonetheless.

7. Bruce Wayne x Nicola Holden: Ok the Brooding Guy/Gentle Girl trope is a mixed bag these days but I really like this trope in regards to Brucola. Like with Artie/Rho, Bruce and Nicola come from different social classes but has that same compassion and drive to help others. Nicola is someone Bruce can trust but at the same time she lets him know there are boundaries (aka don't use my weaknesses as a contingency plan). I also feel like Bruce needs a sort of normal love interest, while he has canon normal girlfriends most of them were pretty boring. At least with Nicola she has has a life outside being a love interest her own goals and motivations. She also loves Bruce for him, not because of his money and good looks. It's a generally healthy dynamic built on honesty & empathy. Another reason why I find this pair adorable is that it actually matches with the rest of the Trinity; you know, like how Superman is with a journalist and Wondy is with a soldier/agent. Nicola & Bruce having different ways of pursuing justice while still sharing similar moral codes. It helps that Nicola is actually a hero rather than an antihero/villain/straight villain (Bruce dating a villan would only make him look like a hypocrite). Nicola sees all facets of Bruce's life and makes the choice to stay; provides some much needed light not just in his life but also the rest of the Batfam. In turn Bruce has another connection to the normal world that is willing to be in his life and see him genuinely happy. They're mature adults who ground each other and build each other up.

8. Optimus Prime x Malina Lovelace: Okay is it just me or do I think TFA Optimus Prime needs more love? What's funny is that at first Malina didn't like the thought of being outshined by newcomers in her superhero career. Spending time with Optimus makes her realize that there's more to being a superhero than fame. Optimus doesn't look down on her, and is more than willing to work with her and appreciate her work. She becomes touched by his friendliness and aceepts him and the other Bots. At the same time Malina reminds Optimus that it's okay to make mistakes and move on, and that it's okay to cut toxic people out. I even wrote a noncanon ficlet where Malina calls out Sentinel and Blackarachnia for the way they treat Optimus. OptMalina is a romance built on respect despite the obvious differences. Not to mention they have each other's back, and they learn about each other each time. And just like with KayLeo and BatRose there's different continuities which means unique versions of the Optlina pair. The Bayverse *chortle* and Prime versions are a few I'd love to explore in the future!

Miscellaneous

- Chad Charming x Soraya Nedakh: Essentially snobby rich kid who learns to be self sufficient and see past appearances through a positive influence. Soraya helps Chad to understand that being royalty isn't just pretty clothes and parties but actually using that status to help others. And Chad actually has his views challenged: Soraya doesn't back down easily.

- Jetta x Zane: The concept of JettaZane (or A Touch Of Snow/IceMagic) is that the robot teaches the human what it's like to be human. Jetta started out as an extremely cold person and a loner, but her time with Zane - the literal ninja of ice - gradually melts her heart & she becomes more caring and accepting. So the robot programmed to be human helps the human raised to be a cold machine unlearn her toxic traits and reclaim her humanity. Also Pixane is kinda boring imo, like they're only together because they're both robots. Not very compelling if you ask me.

- Brian Crown x Kelly Arbol: The wellmeaning goofball and the beatnik poet are something I rarely see much of, but that pretty much sums up their ship. Brian may be a bit self centered but he has a heart of gold and through Kelly's influence he becomes more confident in being a worthy successor to his dad. Meanwhile Brian respects Kelly in and out costume and teaches her how to have fun. Not to mention Kelly interacts with someone outside her circle, which is a welcome change from the trope of only dating someone within your circle.

- Janus Lee x Lenora Rose: Another pair from the same show as Paine and Qiu Jin, there's not much to say on them other than it's one of the most tragic couples. Lenora died a long time ago due to circumstances beyond her & Mr. Lee's control and it's her death that was the catalyst to his gradual descent into evil. As the show goes on we see glimpses of their life together and realize that Lenora is more than the Ghost, she was someone with her own dreams and motivations. She and Janus were outcasts who found companionship in each other, and were able to build a life together using their hard-earned resources to help others. Even in the last few months of her life she didn't go down without a fight, wanting her legacy to be one of love and hope. It's her memory that may be the key to redeeming Mr. Lee in the future of A.T.O.M.

- Ben Florian x Paige: Again not much else to say but they're the antithesis of Mal x Ben. One thing that bothers me about Mal & Ben is that they are supposed to be equals when it's pretty darn obvious from the scenes they were not. With PaigeBen it's clear that they ARE equals who respect each other. Ben's agency isn't reduced to just love interest, he has someone he has good communication with and wants to see him succeed. Paige has someone who shares her interests and see her more than just that One American Newbie. They LEARN to work together without love potions involved. Plus we haven't had a commoner Disney Princess in a while so Paige fills in as someone who works her way into high status then uses that status to help others with Ben at her side.

That's enough of my Canon x OC OTPs! I hope to explore them more throughout the year :) I work hard to flesh out my OCs and their romantic storylines as if they're real 💚😌

I do have KayLeo week planned for Feb 14 to Feb 21 so don't be shocked when I start posting rottmnt stuff or art of Kaysha! Anyways these are my personal ships that I enjoy despite the lack of content I made of them, so hopefully I have the creative juices flowing to make more stuff! Final note I'm working on a platonic oc x canon meme to show that love doesn't have to be romantic. A

[freddiesaysalright]

Which of your fics...

Tagged by @snugglyducklingbrewhouse  and @crazylittlethingcalledobsession Thank you both for thinking of me, I’m really excited for this one! I’m gonna stick with my multi-chapter/long fics for these.

Which fic did you think would get a bigger reaction/audience than it got? Tale as Old as Time. The fairy tale AU with Rami as Prince Adam. But, as usual, Rami fics don’t tend to do as well as the others. 

Got a better reaction than you expected? The Most Dramatic Season Ever. I really thought no one would be into the idea of a Bachelorette AU since I don’t see much Bachelor content here on tumblr. But the fic did really well. It still gets notes here and there. 

Is your funniest? Just Like a Woman has to be some of the best comedy I’ve written. Or the bits of standup in Peace Like a River.

Is your darkest/angstiest? Peace Like a River had dark moments, but I think this one actually has to go to Beautiful Mess. So much sadness happened in that fic. Poor Bri got shot. Oof.

Is your absolute favourite? This is tough. My fics are my babies, but I’m gonna have to go with my OG fic of the Queen fandom that started it all - My Man. 

Is your least favourite? I don’t love Soft in Love. Idk why, but I don’t feel like my heart was totally in that one and I think it shows.

Was the easiest to write? Part of Your World. I had soooooooo many ideas for that fic going in and when I started writing, it flowed out of me. That was the fairy tale AU I was most excited about. 

Was the hardest to write? Journey to the Past. I feel like I’m rushing the story in that one, and I’m not proud of the stuff I have so far, which is making my motivation to finish it even worse. 

Has your favourite line/exchange/paragraph? I Don’t Like You or Your Band has most of my favorites overall but this one was the big moment: 

You arrived to the studio early the next morning. It was raining heavily as thunder rolled in the distance. Cosmically, John was the only other person there. You didn’t let the fact that you’d gotten off to the thought of him throw you. You just took your seat on the couch, ringing out your hair, and waited in silence with him. You pulled out the book you were reading and dove in. The only sound was the patter of the rain on the roof. “Why didn’t you tell me what happened to you when you came to London?” he asked suddenly. You snapped the book shut and looked at him icily. “I didn’t realize that was any of your business.” “I know you’re not this person,” he said. “When you looked at Cora yesterday, you were yourself again.” “You don’t know anything about who I am, John Deacon,” you said. “A lot has changed since we left Oadby.” “You’re avoiding my question.” “You’re assuming you have a right to an answer.” “I think I do have a right,” he said hotly. “A lot of this anger you’ve got is clearly directed at me. Maybe if you stopped biting everyone’s head off and talked about it, you wouldn’t be so pissed off.” There was that look again. The pity guilt combination that made your stomach roil. “Fine,” you snipped. “You wanna know what happened to me? Yes, I got robbed and left naked behind a building. I took a job as a waitress to scrape by and pay back a fraction of debt I owed Cora. And there were a few regulars at the bar who I fucked for money. Anything else?” “How’d you get a writing position?” he asked levelly. “One of the regulars introduced me to an editor friend of his,” you said. “I submitted my first article to him, and he took me on. I got better and was eventually offered the job I’ve got now.” “Okay, how is any of this my fault?” “Is that what you think?” you laughed. “I don’t blame you for any of that shit. You weren’t even in my life anymore.” “Then why are you so angry at me?!” he demanded, getting to his feet. You jumped up too. “I’m angry at you because you lied to me!” “What?!” “You did!” you cried. “You broke up with me, and it broke my heart. But it was okay because we were supposed to be friends. And yet I was the only one who made any effort. Then suddenly you were off to London and then I never heard a thing from you! And I wrote you every day! Every day until I came here looking for you! And you promised you’d write to me, John!” You choked on his name as your throat got thick with the old wound. “You promised,” you repeated with childish stubbornness. “I’m sorry,” he said earnestly. You rolled your eyes. “What do you want from me, John? My forgiveness?” “Well, it was only letters,” he said. “Only letters?” you repeated quietly. “John, it’s not about the letters. It’s the fact that you didn’t give enough of a shit about me to pick up a goddamn pen. Our relationship meant that little to you. I meant that little to you.” You had scarcely gotten the words out when Roger and Brian walked in, both rain soaked, and flicking water off their coats. 

Have you re-read the most? Lingerie and I’m sure we all know why lmao

Would you recommend to someone reading your work for the first time? Just Like a Woman or Catching Up. Those are the most my style I think. 

Are you most proud of? Dancing With Ben. A lot of work went into that fic - finding the dances and figuring out how to describe them. And I think the pacing worked great, and I just loved how it ended. Story structure wise, I felt like it was my best. 

Tagging: Anyone who wants to! I’m not really sure who’s still writing anymore, so I don’t wanna put the pressure on lol

[anxiouslymalicious]

Losers Club Plus One Part 10

A Richie Tozier x daughter!reader series

Read the previous part here or go here for the full series masterlist.

A/N: Hi there! It’s been a while, I know, and I’m truly sorry! There has been so much going on in my life and I simply lost my motivation to write. However, thanks to a very dear person, I have regained said motivation and I am here to give y’all some content! The next part is already being worked on and I hope to publish it very soon!

Anyway, this is about 3k words long. I hope you enjoy!

“Bill, we’re at the library. Where are you?” Mike asked the second Bill answered his phone. The incomplete Losers Club Plus One was gathered around him, trying to listen in on what they were talking about. To say that they were worried was an understatement. But the fact that Bill had picked up was relieving, to say the least. It meant that he was still with them. It meant that IT hadn’t gotten to him. It meant that he was more or less safe. It meant that Bill was still alive and not doing anything too stupid.

“IT took a-a little k-k-kid- IT k-killed a little k-kid right in fucking front of me.” Bill sounded distraught, heartbroken. He had been crying, probably still was crying. Y/N, who was close enough to Mike to listen in on the conversation, especially felt a strong urge in her to just hug the man and tell him that it wasn’t his fault. Because it really wasn’t. But Bill thought differently. It was his fault that Georgie was taken by IT, Georgie had been taken because he hadn’t been there. And Dean, the little kid, had been killed because Bill hadn’t been fast enough. It was Bill’s fault, in his mind, and it would always be.

“No, no, no, no, no,” Mike jumped out of his seat. He had known Bill when he was a kid, he knew that Bill often made stupid decisions, and Mike was sure that Bill’s want to protect the Losers from IT was kicking in just then. If there was one thing each of them remembered about Bill, it was his unintentional heroism as he was trying to protect his friends.

“Look, just come back to the library, we can talk about the plan-“

“I’m gonna go kill IT. I don’t want any of you to get near IT. I’m gonna kill IT.” Bill said through gritted tears before hanging up, falling into a quick jog towards Silver. It was only a matter of seconds until he and Silver were fast enough to beat the devil. And the devil, they would beat.

“He’s gonna fight IT alone. Alone!” Mike said, almost as though he was concluding the very short call he and Bill just had. Mike was scared. Not only for Bill who was driven to do the stupidest things, all by Pennywise, but he was also scared for the rest of his friends. The people who had once gone down the drain with him, explored the sewers with him, fought IT with him. But most importantly, he felt scared for the new generation. Because if they failed now, if the ritual didn’t work and all of them were to end up dead, what hope did the children have left? IT would continue to attack children, eat children, tear families apart.

“What?” Richie mumbled more to himself than anyone else. And, almost as though he had the same train of thought as Mike, he looked at his daughter. The girl he had watched as she grew up and had taken care of nearly every day of her life. He felt his heart drop to the pit of his stomach as he thought of the things IT would do should he and his friends fail to kill IT once and for all. Or, should she be able to escape Derry, the things she would have to live through as she got back home to LA. Would she be able to provide for herself? Who could she go to once he was gone? How would she handle all the paperwork? And oh, all those moments ahead of her that he was going to miss. Graduations, relationships, first jobs, first travels, all the accomplishments and big events in her life that he would miss. The moments that would fill her with pride but also shatter her heart if he wasn’t there.

Y/N looked up at Richie. Her mind was blank with pure worry. She hadn’t thought further than what would happen to Bill just yet, but maybe it was for the better. Maybe it was better that she didn’t worry her head with too many consequences and the horrors of IT, the true horrors of IT that she had yet to face.

“It’s- it’s about the group. The ritual doesn’t work without the group. Doing it together was why it worked.” Mike’s fear was growing, steadily consuming him. Like a shadow covering the little light of hope, he had left after noticing that the remainder of his friends had come to the library. He had felt so hopeful when he saw all of their faces, despite the horrid circumstances, in the library, knowing that they had gotten their tokens, knowing that they would face IT with him. He had trusted Bill to come back as well, he knew that Big Bill was known to stick to his friends. Leaving them to fend for themselves was not like Bill. Not at all. This wasn’t Big Bill talking, this was Bill, the author with the childhood trauma, talking. The man who had no idea how to properly end a book. They needed to show him how it’s done.

Y/N was gnawing at her thumb. It was sore and it stung a little, but it provided her comfort. Not much, but every single bit of comfort was more than welcome. Eddie saw, and pushed her arm down, hoping it would pull her out of her thoughts and get her to stop hurting herself. A million arguments as to why she shouldn’t do that, shouldn’t nibble at her nails when she was nervous, ran through his mind, he was ready to spill them out, but he bit his tongue. Y/N surely didn’t need that right now. She needed someone to take care of her. She needed her father.

With anxious eyes, Eddie searched for Richie.

Richie, lost in his thoughts and fears, wasn’t one to quickly notice. He didn’t even properly listen in on what the Losers were talking about. He heard Ben speak. Voice raspy, heavy with worry. Then Bev. Her voice was airy, light like she didn’t want anyone to hear her words because she didn’t want them to be true.

Richie looked up. He noticed that he hadn’t heard either of his loves speak up in a while. His gaze landed on Eddie immediately.

The man had slung one arm very awkwardly around his daughter, almost like Eddie wasn’t sure of his role in that particular moment, nor did he seem very confident with it. Both Eddie and Y/N were looking at Richie with raised brows and huge eyes. They resembled a pair of helpless puppies in a way.

With a few quick strides, Richie reached the pair and pulled his little girl close to him. Y/N leaned against her father. It felt strangely foreign and yet so natural to be so close to him. Her whole body seemed to still be a little confused with what was going on, how to feel about Richie, how to act around him. But Y/N knew him. And she knew his comfort. Richie was something to hold on to. Someone who had always been there. Father or not, she needed to feel at home. And that was exactly what Richie was.

Home.

“Oh, we’re not going to like this, are we?” Eddie asked, making Richie and Y/N listen in on the conversation around them again.

Y/N looked at the group. Everyone suddenly seemed much tenser. Arms crossed, faces cold, almost sorrowful looks in their eyes. Sighing, and then-

“Fuck.” Y/N whispered as something clicked in her mind. Shit was about to go down.

Derry had turned dark. Very dark. But not only the sky had lost its light, the occasional lightning on the horizon being an exception, but the town itself seemed to change. It was like the town had become one of ghosts. Barely a soul left a trace. Very few windows were lit. It was like time had stopped around Derry and no one was alive, or at least truly waking anymore. Everyone except for the Losers Club Plus One.

Y/N found herself feeling more and more like she was asleep. She couldn’t say it had been since arriving in town. Coming to Derry was strange. It was like she had started reading a book from the middle. She had a very small knowledge of what has been happening and tiny snippets of explanations were thrown her way, but nothing really. It just wasn’t enough. And the more she lost herself in the book, the twisted storylines and the even more confusing actions of the characters, the more she felt like nothing was real. Like whatever was happening wasn’t really happening and she had actually fallen asleep while reading a book.

But every book also had an ending. And not all of them were happy endings.

“Whatcha thinkin’ about, squirt?” Richie broke the silence in the car. Richie and Y/N were riding together, just like Mike and Ben and Bev and Eddie. All of the pairs were ready to beat silver. Desperate to beat silver.

“Don’t know… Just… This place, I guess. It’s strange, isn’t it?” Y/N looked at her father. His face, every now and then illuminated by the scarce light of the streetlights all around Derry, seemed so young, yet he didn’t act like he usually did. Even Richie ‘Trashmouth’ Tozier seemed to be intimidated by the situation he found himself in.

“It is. And I never missed it.”

“You couldn’t even remember it until Mike called.”

“Because I didn’t want to.”

“So you didn’t want to remember Eddie either?” Y/N smirked.

“Damn you, squirt. Sometimes I really wish your mom would have swallowed.”

Silence.

“Do you think things will change when we get home? Like between us?” Y/N asked curiously. But there was a sliver of hurt in her voice. Richie sighed.

“I don’t think anything is going to change unless we make a change. If you don’t want things to change between us, they don’t have to. We can act like Derry never happened when we get home. We can forget about all of this.”

It was strange hearing Richie speak all wise and serious. But it felt nice. It felt nice knowing that he took Y/N and her worries seriously and didn’t just flip them off as irrelevant.

“I don’t think I want to forget.” Y/N mumbled more to herself than to her father.

Richie’s car caught up with the other two. He hadn’t noticed how far they had fallen behind until he noticed that he could barely see the other cars before them. That’s when he sped. And it felt nice. It felt like he finally regained at least a little control over something. The last time he felt so powerless and so small compared to the world was when he entered the house on Neibolt Street for the first time. When he saw how Eddie got hurt. When he tried to reposition Eddie’s broken arm and was trapped in the same room as IT.

When the group split up for the first time.

When everything somehow shifted. And they were the world’s oldest 13-year olds.

“I can see Bill!” Y/N exclaimed, sitting up straight in her car seat, hand shooting to the seat belt buckle.

“Fuck.” Richie said as he watched Bill pushing a bike away. Was that silver? Richie was sure that he somehow had gotten his trusted bike back. How exactly, Richie didn’t know. Things had a way of coming back in Derry. But it wasn’t important. What was important was getting back together.

“Bill!” Beverly yelled, effectively stopping Bill. He turned to look at her just as he was about to enter the house.

Y/N felt like she was trapped inside a bad horror movie. The house she was facing was dark, the wood it was made of looked like it defied the laws of nature as it still stood. Y/N felt like she should feel silly, she should not be able to take this house seriously. It was the definition of a bad idea, but somehow, she felt compelled to show respect. Something about it felt intimidatingly evil. She knew the house would be no good, but she didn’t expect the place they would fight IT in to be looking as shabby yet scary.

“No!” Bill yelled back as he watched the group step closer to him and the building. They all were there. Bev, Mike, Ben, Eddie, Richie, even Y/N. Y/N, who was just a little older than they were when they first encountered IT.

Bill felt tears stinging in his eyes. He didn’t want to risk his friends’ lives again. And he for sure didn’t want to be the reason another kid had to go through what he and his friends did. Or – worst of all – he didn’t want to risk seeing another kid die because of him.

“N-no, you guys, no. I st-st-started all this. I-It’s m-my fault that y-you’re all here. Th-this curse, this fucking thing- It’s inside you all. It’s s-started growing the day I m-m-made you all go down to the barrens. Bec-cause all I cared about was finding G-Georgie. Now I’m gonna go in there, I don’t know what’s gonna happen, but I c-can’t ask you to d-do this.” Bill sounded distraught.

Y/N, subliminally, wrapped her arms around her father’s right arm. Richie acknowledged it, pulling her a little closer, but remained silent as they watched Bill fall apart with the pent-up guilt. The guilt he had been living with, sometimes more and sometimes less consciously, over the past 28 years.

Bill made eye contact with Y/N. He looked at her and saw so much potential in her. So much life, so much she had yet to give the world. And he felt sorry that she was there. He felt sorry for the pain she had endured over the past hours. Physically and mentally. Bill felt sorry for the wounds and the scars that, ultimately, he was to blame for. Because none of this would have happened if he had listened to his father. If he had stopped looking for Georgie. Or better yet, if he never acted sick to avoid playing with Georgie.

Had Bill not been so selfish, Georgie would still be alive.

“But you’re not asking us.” Y/N told Bill. “We’re here because we want to be. All of us could have left, we are free to go. But we didn’t.”

Bill sighed, running a hand through his hair to push it back. It felt sweaty, his whole head felt heated and the slight breeze of evening air felt nice. Relieving.

Richie looked funnily at his daughter. A part of him was scared she might tell the story of how they almost left if it wasn’t for Stan the man. Another part of him, however, registered that she wanted to be there. Be there, at Neibolt, with them. And it scared him to death. Nausea washed over him again and Richie had a hard time not showing just that.

Beverly picked up something from the ground. Something long and rusty. To all the Losers, it seemed to make sense, seemed to be a missing piece from a puzzle. Only Y/N watched on, visibly confused.

“Well, we’re not asking you either,” Beverly replied.

“We didn’t do this alone then, Bill. So, we’re not gonna do this alone now.” Mike added.

“Losers stick together.” Ben.

A pregnant pause. The air was thick with tension as the Losers made it clear that Big Bill wouldn’t go in there on his own. Like they had proven to one another once before. When they were nothing more than a mismatched group of kids that fit together perfectly.

The only sounds outside the house were crickets chirping in the night, an occasional roll of thunder and the wind lightly blowing through the grass. No one dared to speak up. No one dared to say another word. But not all words had been spoken yet. Each Loser was just waiting for the next move. The words that would decide how they were to proceed. 

“So, does somebody wanna say something?” Eddie broke the silence. And with that, decisions were made. The Losers would, once more, stick together.

“Richie said it b-b-best when we were here last.” Bill replied, looking at Richie expectantly. Richie now looked taken aback. He couldn’t remember ever saying the right thing at the right moment. Even Y/N looked at her father, a hint of curiosity on her otherwise confused face.

“I did?” Richie asked, still not remembering. He felt the Losers’ eyes on him, all of them waiting to hear the familiar words again. Richie thought for a moment.

“I don’t wanna die?” he asked. His daughter loosened her grip on him and shrugged a little.

“Very reasonable.” She mumbled to herself.

“Not that.” Bill’s voice sounded hoarse. A few moments of silence as Richie thought again, trying to remember what he said that day.

“You’re lucky we’re not measuring dicks?” The Losers looked at Richie, unimpressed. Y/N, however, had to fight back her giggle, but a tiny snort escaped the girl. She couldn’t hold herself back at the unexpected and yet so typical statement from the man she grew up with.

“No…” The Trashmouth whispered to himself as his friends failed to answer. The group seemed to ease up a little despite the situation they found themselves in.

“Let’s kill this fucking clown?” Bill grinned at that. The Trashmouth had found his words.

“Let’s kill this fucking clown!” Richie repeated, this time more eager. With that, the group found their spirit. The Losers Club was back and ready to kill a bitch. With that, the Losers entered the house that they knew was potentially the last place they would visit. 

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