#I get it comes with the fame but it still rubs me the wrong way

[vampv0id]

Every time I see a picture of Hugh or Mads taken without their consent by the paparazzi my skin crawls

[whimsicalpolitical]

Is there somewhere - Matty Healy

fwb x matty

warnings: 18+ mdni, oral (m & f receiving), unprotected sex, smoking, grinding, fingering

-

The city's neon lights flicker through the partially open curtains, casting shifting patterns on the hotel room walls. The air is thick with the scent of smoke drifting in from the balcony where Matty stands, a cigarette between his fingers. You can see his silhouette through the glass door, the orange ember flaring brightly every time he takes a drag.

You pull his shirt closer around you, the fabric soft and worn, carrying the faint scent of his cologne. The bed is a tangle of sheets and pillows, a testament to the laughter and passion you shared earlier. Now, the room feels emptier, colder without him beside you.

Enough of the lonely, cold feeling you stand up and waddle over to him, walking through the door onto the balcony.

Matty’s back is facing you and he seems to be so lost in thoughts that he can’t hear you. He only notices you when your front hugs his naked back.

“Didn’t want to sleep?” He asks, turning around and pulling you into him.

“Not without you.” You add, “why are you still awake?”

Matty shrugs, “don’t know, I s’pose I’m not tired.”

You hum and close your eyes, feeling the cold wind blow through your hair, refreshing you since you’re still a bit sweaty from earlier.

“You seem tense,” you speak, rubbing your hands over his shoulders. “Is something wrong?”

He nods, but his eyes tell a different story. "Nah, just... band stuff. Nothing new."

You know better than to push. Matty's life is a whirlwind of music, fame, and constant movement. It is part of what drew you to him, but also what makes these quiet moments so precious.

"Come here," he murmurs, pulling you into a deep kiss, as if trying to erase the doubts with his lips.

You moan into his mouth as he parts your lips and dips his tongue between them to taste yours. You taste like mint and cigarettes and he clutches you tighter, wrinkling the fabric of his own shirt in his fist. Matty kisses you so deeply that your throat feels stained with the gasps of breath you exchange.

Matty’s kisses are bruising, unforgiving, merciless, but they are also slow, careful. He isn't sloppy; he does precisely what must be done to get you riled. And when he breaks away, his forehead resting against yours, you tug his hair with a pitiful whine.

"I wasn't done," you tell him.

Matty pouts, mocking. His fingers are wandering under your shirt, leaving you breathless.

His big hands find your tits immediately, squeezing out all his trustrations, tweaking your nipples and lowering his mouth to your throat.

“Matty-“ you whine, “let me make you feel good.”

He unlatches from your throat looking at you with a grin. “Yeah? You really want that, don’t you. Want to have your mouth on me all the time.”

“Go on then, love. I’m never going to say no to that. Suck me off while I smoke.”

You hook a finger in his belt loop. “Can I?”

He laughs, guiding your hand to the buckle on his belt. "Go on. Do what you wanna do, darlin’."

He belongs to you. He's yours to mould the way you want. At least you want that.

Your fingers do away with his belt, whipping it out of the loops and throwing it on the floor.

He lights a cigarette and breathes the smoke out, his eyes not once wavering from you.

The scrape of his zipper and the delectable anticipation of hooking your fingers in the waistband and guiding them slowly down his hips.

His cock springs forward, thick and heavy and so hard it must ache, as you shuck his jeans down with his boxers. He grunts above you, his cock bobbing at the sight of your pretty lips parting. But you don't take him into your mouth. You grasp the base of his cock and gently nuzzle your cheek against his length.

Something like a strangled whimper leaves his throat.

"Love," he chokes.

"Yes, baby?" you say sweetly, looking up at him through your lashes.

"Jesus," he says through his teeth. "You're so fuckin' sexy. Fuck."

You hum, slowly stroking your hand up and down as your tongue darts out to lick his balls. Matty’s hips stutter, his hand flying out to catch himself on the railing. "Goddamn. Jesus-"

Your coy smile knocks him askew, your lips pursing as you spit on the head of his cock, spreading your own saliva around the tip with your thumb.

"I’m trying not to let it show"—a soft kiss to the tip has a rumbling groan crawling out of his throat-"that I don’t wanna let this go.”

“Getting sentimental?” Matty exhales hard-smoke parting his lips-, struggling to remember how breathing works when he's got you playing with his cock like it's your favourite toy. "I’m not going to let you go, fuck.”

You wrap your fingers around the head of his cock and twist your hand up and down his shaft in a couple slow strokes. You're driving him fucking crazy.

His vision is whiting out.

"So pretty" you purr, licking a broad stripe up the underside of his length. Matty’s chest is heaving with the effort of holding back. "Best cock I’ve ever had.”

Matty caves, threading his fingers through your hair at the nape of your neck and stroking his thumb along your jaw. "Fuck, baby. Please..."

His hips jut forward instinctively. "You’re the sweetest, love.”

You flick your tongue against his slit and relish his groan, revelling in the sight of his flushed chest, his pink cheeks, the sweat on his brow. His jaw is tense, his nostrils flaring. He's trying not to take control.

You slap his cock twice on your tongue and finally take it past your lips, sealing your mouth over the head. Matty moans, white-knuckling the railing, his other hand now stroking your hair. You fondle his balls in your free hand while the other grips him at the base, and he's going to come embarrassingly soon if you keep looking up at him this way.

Your tongue swirls around the head of his cock while your lips seal tight, greedily suckling at his tip.

Oversensitive, skin prickling with salty sweat, Matty practically breathes through his teeth. "Gonna kill me," he manages. "You're gonna kill me, baby."

"Mmmm," you reply, happily taking him deeper, his length sliding along the warm wetness of your tongue. Matty’s fingers tighten in your hair.

"Fuuuuck. You do love this cock."

"Mmmhmm."

"Love takin' me into your mouth like a little slut."

"Mmmmph," you agree.

The sloppy sounds of your mouth working his cock send his head spinning. Drool dribbles from the corners of your lips, your eyes squeezing black tears from dewy lashes. And when you take him down your throat, the sound of your choked moan leaves Matty with little choice but to pull out before he comes.

“Fuck, stop.”

“Why?” You whine, squeezing your thighs together. He swipes his thumb underneath your eye and shows you the black smudge from your mascara.

“Why? I don’t wanna cum in your gorgeous little mouth when I can cum inside of you.”

You blush and he sees your eyes glim at the thought of his cum dripping out of you.

“Ah, my girl likes that.” He laughs, “up.” He orders and grips your arm to lift you off the ground.

My girl. Your brain is getting hazy. All you ever want to be is his girl, but you know how complicated it gets with matty. You take what he gives you.

Matty pulls his boxers over his still very hard length before he throws his pants inside the hotel room.

“Lay down on the bed , get yourself comfortable f’me. I’m gonna smoke one more cigarette before I’ll come inside.” His hand caresses your cheek, his thumb coming to your lips. “Don’t bother to touch yourself though.”

“What if I will?”

“Fucks sake,” he half groans, throwing his head back, “then I’ll have to spank you.”

You wink because you both know you’ll mostly enjoy that.

You get pulled in by your hips, landing flush against his body. Your lips meet again, yours wetter than his but he enjoys tasting himself on you a bit.

It's sloppy, and desperate, and you feel drunk on the taste of him. He's groaning into your mouth, grabbing your head with both hands, burying his fingers in your hair — as if he can't get close enough, as if he'll only be satisfied once he's swallowed you whole. You're pretty sure you want him to.

He’s licking into your mouth over and over, eliciting a whimper from you when his hand wraps around the side of your throat, just under your jaw.

Your palms splay across his torso, wander over warm, golden skin. You need to feel more of him.

"Matty," you whimper into his mouth, fingers winding around his bicep.

He pulls back. Peers at you through hooded eyes.

"Whats wrong, love?" he asks through labored breaths.

"Need you — please."

“Fuck the cigarette, let’s go,” he says practically pulling you into your shared room.

He instantly begins to pull your his shirt over your head, while you fumble your way back to the bed.

Matty is tossing you onto the mattress, grinning at the fact that you’re not wearing a bra. With one swift movement he gets rid of your panties as well, not looking but just throwing them behind him.

"Fuck, I love them so much, fucking perfect,” he breathes, “perfect as you are." Matty growls dropping to his knees at the edge of the bed to part your legs, draping them over his shoulders as he admires the wet mess between your thighs, your slick already coating your folds, glistening in the dim light of your hotel room. "Always so drenched, your pussy looks so gorgeous.”

Dragging his fingers through your folds, collecting your arousal as he ghosts over your throbbing clit, you let out a soft whimper in protest, sitting up on your elbows to look down at Matty peppering kisses to the soft flesh on your thighs.

“That’s right, look at me, baby.”

“Matty- please just fuck me.”

His kisses travel to your center, nose brushing against your aching bundle of nerves before looking up at you with a lustful smirk, tightening his grip around your hips to hold you in place.

Matty shakes his head as he laughs quietly to himself, watching you squirm and buck your hips towards his face, so desperately worked up and aching.

"Darlin’" Matty tuts, almost mockingly, digging his fingertips deeper into the meat of your flesh, "I will not get my dick wet again before you’ll come, ever. Should know that by now.”

Before you have a chance to respond, the flat of Matty’s tongue is dragging through your heat in a long, broad stroke, firmly pressing against your clit, looking up at you with a satisfied grin as you throw your head back in pleasure, a soft whimper escaping from your parted lips.

You cry out as you can feel his finger sink deep into your entrance.

"Oh f-fuck-" You whimper as another finger breaches your tight hole, already sucking him in with your warm, wet walls while his digits curled, bumping against the sweet spot inside you that he knows made you crumble.

"That's it, sweet girl" He cooes, thrusting his fingers in and out of your cunt before diving back between your legs like a man starved, his tongue dancing in a swirling pattern of flicks and strokes between your folds as he laps you up.

You can feel yourself rolling your hips against his hand, whining at how thick and full he feels inside you.

“Fuckin’ grinding your hips down on me s’ hot, feels good?”

Matty can feel your pussy beginning to flutter around his fingers as your bottom half squirms against the sheets of the bed, the knot in your stomach beginning to tighten, tingling building at the base of your spine.

Latching his lips around your clit, he begins to suck at your sensitive nub, his hand thrusting faster and deeper into your cunt, feeling you slowly coming undone under his touch.

"Matty- matty- fuck.” Just like that, you are falling over the brink of collapse, your orgasm crashing through you like a tidal wave, pleasure flowing through every inch of your veins as you met your high, feeling the smirk of Matty’s smile pressed against your cunt as you soak his face, his free hand wrapping around your hip, holding you in place for him.

"Fuck, I swear, I'll never fucking get over that." Matty mewles, pulling back enough to sit on his heels, admiring the wet and puffy mess your pussy had become, gently pulling his fingers out of your heat, looking down at the way your arousal coated his fingers. "Fucking soaked me, love.”

It’s too much sometimes, matty talking like this. Like this is temporary and he loves it so much he’ll always enjoy doing this. You don’t know how long always is. You just wanna feel his lips against your skin all the time. Not only when he’s on tour and needs you to fulfill his needs, but at the end of the day it’s what you agreed to.

You have to enjoy this.

“Baby, don’t leave me just yet, yeah?” He says, climbing up your body until his bulge is pressing against your upper thigh. “Want you now.”

“You have me,” you whisper against his lips before kissing them, losing yourself in that feeling.

“I can have you all the time, can’t I?”

You nod and hum pulling him in again, you can’t get enough of the way his lips feel against yours.

You feel his weight shift a little, his hand disappearing between your body’s to pull his boxers of to free his erection.

“Feel me? I’m hard for you all the time.”

“God-“ you breathe, reaching your own hand down to slowly stroke his cock.

Matty kisses you again, the two of you breathing into each other's mouths. His hands move down your sides, and his thumbs stroked the underside of your breasts.

You feel his hardness against the inside of your thigh, his hand moving in between your legs. He slides up towards your clit, and when his thumb presses down on your swollen nub, you whimper into his mouth.

Matty continues, his thumb rubbing tight circles over your clit, while his middle and ring finger slide into your soaked cunt.

"Look at that,love, still soaked."

"Mmmm, Matty, please." You whine, bucking your hips to match the pace of his fingers.

"Please what, darling? What do you need?"

"Need you." You plead. "Please, fuck me."

Matty lets out a strangled grunt and removes his fingers from your dripping cunt. You watch as he brings his fingers up to his mouth and sucks, licking them clean.

You are shaking with anticipation, watching him stroke himself, spreading the wetness from your cunt along his thick length. He rubs the tip along your slit, coating his cock with your slick.

He presses his forehead against yours, lining himself up with your entrance. You feel him begin to push himself inside of you, and he groans as you stretch to make yourself comfortable.

"Oh, fuck." He moans.

You wrap your legs around his waist, pulling him closer. Matty slides his arms under your back and holds you against him. You can feel the heat radiating off of him, and when he starts moving inside of you, he feels impossibly deep.

His thrusts are slow and steady, the pace almost maddening.

"You feel so good, baby." He groans into your neck.

"Harder." You plead

Matty obliges, thrusting harder, and faster, and you feel the pressure build deep inside of you. Your hips roll up to meet his, and the slapping sounds of your bodies fill the room.

Matty’s grip on your back tightens, and he lifts you up and holds you in his arms. Your tits bounce and he is fucking you so hard that the sound of your moans are louder than the sound of his groans.

You clutch his arms like stairwell railings. He clutch clutches your brain and eases your ailing.

"So, fucking perfect. So good, love. You take my cock so well, baby."

You are shaking, feeling overwhelmed by everything, and you dig your fingers into his shoulders.

"Come for me, I know you’re close."

He leans forward and places his hand around your neck, not squeezing, but holding. He is taking complete control of your body, and it is sending you over the edge.

The pleasure is almost painful, the coil in your abdomen ready to snap. You can’t form words, just a series of moans and whimpers as Matty pounds into you.

You explode around him, your pussy fluttering and clenching, and Matty comes with you.

"Fuck." He grunts, thrusting into you a few more times before spilling inside of you.

Matty kisses you deeply, his tongue pushing its way past your lips. You let out a sigh and collapse against him, feeling the sweat pool at your temples.

"Holy shit." You whisper

"mhm." Matty chuckles

You smile and lean up to press a kiss to his jaw.

"Don’t piss off just yet, alright?” You ask, wanting him to stay and to actually sleep next to you.

“Baby,” he states, pulling out of you. It stings more than it should, not only the void but it hurts your heart.

“Matty,” you say, watching as he sits up and immediately putting your hand on his back. “Please.”

You hear him sigh and look at you, “d’you need to have a cuddle?”

You roll your eyes and huff, “forget it okay? I forgot it was just sex.”

You search for your own shirt- this time- next to the bed and when you find it you pull it over your head.

Matty is rubbing his forehead aggressively, “don’t leave, I’m a wanker okay? I apologize.”

You put your thumbs up and give him an ironic grin.

“Means a lot,” you hiss.

Matty reaches out tentatively, his fingers brushing against your arm. "Baby.”

You roll your eyes and turn your back to him. "Forget about it? It was stupid, let’s just sleep.”

"Don't be like that. I'm sorry."

You huff again, but something in his voice makes you pause. "Fine," you mutter, lying back down and pulling the covers over yourself.

Matty hesitates before sliding back into bed next to you, his arm slipping around your waist. "Can I?”

You stay silent, but you don't push him away. After a moment, you let out a soft sigh, leaning back into him. "Yes."

Matty holds you a little tighter, his breath warm against your neck. "Love, you mean a lot to me," he whispers.

“Yeah?”

“F’course, fuck,” he turns his head for a split second before looking at you again, “you mean everything.”

Matty’s breath evens out as he nestles closer to you, the warmth of his body a comforting presence. You feel his arm tighten around your waist, his fingers lightly tracing circles on your skin.

You turn your head slightly to look at him, his eyes heavy with sleep but still focused on you. Without saying a word, he leans in, his lips brushing gently against yours. The kiss is slow and tender, a lazy meeting of lips that speaks more than words could.

His mouth is soft and warm, and you can feel the drowsiness in his movements, unhurried and gentle. You respond just as softly, your lips moving against his in a sleepy rhythm. It’s not about passion or urgency, but about connection and the simple comfort of being close.

When he pulls back, he nuzzles his nose against yours, his eyes fluttering closed. "Goodnight," he murmurs, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Goodnight Matty," you whisper back, feeling a sense of peace settle over you as you both drift off, still wrapped in each other’s arms, a rare situation considering Matty’s never asleep next to you when you wake up. You hope that he does tomorrow.

[ldysmfrst]

Incomplete (1) - A Pull to Where?

Paring: Ateez OT8 x Plus-sized FemReader

Status: Ongoing series

Chapter number: 1 of unknown

Word count for Chapter: 3,376  

Word count for Story: 3,376  

Genre: Idol Soulmate AU

Warnings: NOT BETA READ!! This story will contain a bit of angst, fluff, smut, f/m, m/m, and m/f/m. This chapter does not really contain anything to warn about. (let me know if I am wrong)

Story Summary: Ateez are soulmates who earned their way to Fame once they found each other. What happens when a new pull comes during their Towards The Light World Tour? Does 8 really make 1?

INCOMPLETE MASTER LIST / LDYSMFRST MASTER LIST

“I can’t believe it! We are all here for the LA concert! This will be the first time for us. I am so proud of everything and love you all,” exclaimed Hongjoong. Looking around BMO stadium quickly before the VIP ticket holders came in, he could not believe they finally made it after six years. 

“All thanks to our wonderful Captain,” Seonghwa says as he back-hugs his shortest soulmate. “Did you see the lines are already starting to fill with our Atiny? Are you sure we brought enough Merch for all of them?”

“Don’t worry about that, Hwa. I am sure our management brought what they could. Remember, we have to split it between two shows. Are you sure you are up for this? You haven't taken the time to lament your grandfather’s passing. I am sure Atiny will understand if you cannot make it through the show,” Yeosang comments with a concerned look.

Smiling softly, Seonghwa replies, “Atiny are my light in my darkest times. Right now, performing for them… I feel like I am performing to keep my own light shining inside. I couldn’t do this without them, and want to perform best for this tour to honor my late grandfather.”

“Hwa, he is so proud of you. I can tell,” Hongjoong says, turning his head to kiss Seonghwa on the cheek.

One of the stagehands tells the three soulmates, “You have one hour to get ready for sound check.” 

“Let's head backstage and get ready to charm our Atiny,” Yeosang remarks as he pushes Seonghwa and Hongjoong towards the back. 

As the three missing soulmates make it behind the stage, Seonghwa feels his chest tighten. Dropping his hug on Hongjoong, Seonghwa makes his way to the side, where he can glimpse the lawn where the queue is set up for the merchandise and the standard entry. His eyes search the crowd for something. 

Maybe someone familiar or someone to stand out. 

Seonghwa was the most sensitive of all his soulmates, which is why he was known to Atiny as Momhwa. He always cared for the children (San, Wooyoung, Johngo, Yeosang, Mingi, and Yunho) while the Captain was off doing captain-like things. He was also the one to beg for alone time but then worried 24/7 that the rest of his soulmates were being taken good care of when they weren’t in his eyesight. 

Recently, the kids have grown up, which has allowed Hongjoong and Seonghwa to focus on other things. During this time, Seonghwa noticed that he felt like something was missing, but he wasn’t sure what it was. Looking over the crowds, it felt like something was nearby, but what could it be?

“Hwa-hyung, are you okay? Did you see someone out there?” asked San after noticing the intense look on Seonghwa’s face as he peeked out the gap in the stands. 

Rubbing his chest, Hwa replied, “Yeah… I think so. It just gotta be nerves. Still get them, ya know?” San nodded with a smile. “Being back in LA means so much to Joong-ah, and I don’t want to mess it up.” 

Shrugging off the tightness, Seonghwa went to his chair to prepare for sound check. He took his seat between Mingi and Yunho, who are always inseparable; their idle chatter overtook Hwas's thoughts as they got closer to showtime.

“Good job on the sound check, boys! BE:FIRST is ready to go on, and the rest of the gates will open in five,” called another stagehand as they rushed by.

“Mingi-ah, how is your back? You seemed like you were limping a little,” asked Yunho.

“It’s my chest that feels like… I don’t know, like a burning but not a painful burn,” Mingi answered, rubbing his chest. 

“You too?” San and Seonghwa asked at the same time. The three of them looked at each other with wide eyes. Grabbing the other two, Seonghwa pulled them closer to the rest of the group.

“Hey guys, listen to this. San, tell us what you feel,” ordered Hwa.

“Umm… well, it is like a strap around my chest, and it’s pulling me out of the stadium,” San told the group, “Why, hyung?”

“Mingi?” prompted Hwa.

“Yeah, that’s pretty accurate,” he agreed. Looking over his shoulder at BE:FIRST taking the stage, he rubbed his chest harder. "Whatever it is, it just kicked up a notch, but now it's pulling…”

“Toward the stage, right?” Seonghwa urgently says. “Like it’s pulling us to the other side of the stadium?”

San and Mingi nod in agreement. Seonghwa, however, watches Hongjoong’s confused reaction to this information. 

“Hey guys! First set of costumes now, please!” urges the wardrobe noona. Reluctantly to end the conversation, the members get dressed and head to their positions to start the first of two LA Shows. 

The feeling of pulling intensifies as they take the stage, pulling around the stadium and then towards the crowd. The three who feel this intensity seemingly find themselves consistently on the same side of the stage. So often, when they return for their first intermission, the Captain pulls them aside.

“What is going on with the three of you?” Hongjoong asks urgently. “San, you have to pull it together. You are up next. Focus on all of our Atiny, not just the one side. Remember, the performance for our Atiny comes first. We wouldn’t be here without them. Please don’t make the others feel left out.”

“Sorry, Captain. I will do better. I better hurry and change,” San pouts as he runs toward Wooyoung, who also looks concerned. 

“You two, figure out what is going on. I know you both are sensitive to energies and such. If it is something bad, we need to warn security. Even though we are in Korea, it doesn’t mean they don’t have crazed fans, too,” warns Hongjoong.

“You got it, Hyung. Hwa-hyung and I will try to figure it out, but the performance won’t suffer,” Mingi says confidently. Seonghwa nods in agreement as they change costumes and proceed with part 2 of the concert. 

“Seonghwa, San, Mingi, and Hongjoong, what in the hell is going on with you?” exclaims their manager. “Green room. NOW. All eight of you.”

Thankfully, this is a longer intermission as the eight follow their manager’s orders. Pilling into the room, they notice their following change of costumes is laid out and ready for them. Without hesitation or shyness, the soulmates start to change as the manager comes in, “Talk.”

“Manager-nim, we are trying our hardest, but there is something about that side of the venue that is pulling the three of us,” Seonghwa says, pulling up his pants. “I think there is either someone important over there, either someone we already know or someone we need to know.”

“Only the three of you feel this way?” asks the manager, looking around at the rest of the group. 

The rest of the group nods or voices their agreement as they change. He continues, “If that is the case, then you three must stick together, and the rest of you will entertain the rest of Atiny. See if you can figure out what section this “important person” is in.”

“Yes, manager-nim. Thank you,” San bows with a huge smile. Even though Seonghwa and Mingi were the more sensitive ones, San was the one who could hone in on the source the best of them all. He could technically leave the stage and run around with the manager's permission. 

San glanced at their Captain and Seonghwa with a questioning smile, to which both nodded, and San took off looking for his personal security guard. None of the security guards liked it when the boys would go around Atiny, but they got paid extra, so no complaints were heard. Once they discussed San's route, during which song(s), it was time to get in place. 

Taking a deep breath, San focuses on the pull and latches on. It was time to figure out who or what was causing them such a feeling.

This member of the Demon line was on a hunt. 

“Damn it!” San yelled, throwing his hat against the make-up vanity. 

Wooyoung ran up behind him, pulling the fuming soulmate into his arms. “Sannie, it’s okay. Maybe they left early? Do you still feel them?”

“Yes. Yes, I do, but because of the send-off, we cannot go out there and find out what is happening,” San whined into Wooyoung’s neck as he hugged the slightly younger soulmate. “I know what section the pull is centered on, but what 50-100 seats are in that section alone?”

“Maybe they will be at the send-off or back tomorrow night?” offered Wooyoung.

“Hey, San-ah, thank you for trying,” Seonghwa says, entering the room with the rest of the group. “We had a sold-out stadium, and I am proud of you for getting the section down. We can talk to the arena or Ticketmaster to see if they can share any information with us.”

“You know that is all private information, Hwa-hyung,” chides Jongho. “They can’t give out that information. It probably isn’t anything big. If it was something or someone important, they would have reached out to KQ or RCA Records by now or will soon. Don’t let it bother you much longer.”

“You three need to make sure to get rest for tomorrow, please,” asks Yunho.

San, Hwa, and Mingi sigh at the idea that they can’t find any more information right now. San swears that he almost had it. Mingi knows that it is more important than the others believe. Seonghwa thinks he has finally found what is missing.

Today couldn’t have started any worse! 

First, you were so excited that you didn’t get a proper night's rest because you couldn’t fall asleep, and then you kept waking up, hoping not to sleep through your alarms. 

Second, your car breaks down and won't be ready til Monday, but luckily, it is the dealership's fault, so they give you a rental car. 

Third, your make-up artist, who you paid extra for, is sick, so you get the newbie who can’t do a dramatic eye to save anyone's life.

When you meet up with friends who had pushed you to listen to the K-pop band known as Ateez, things finally turn around. You hadn’t seen the two of them in a couple of years, but because of your mutual delulu (not really) ((well kind of)) love of the eight-membered band coming to Los Angles for their World Tour, you finally got to spend time together pining over some of the hottest men in the world. 

You spent the better part of the first half of 2024 sharing shorts, reels, Facebook posts, and YouTube videos back and forth. Because of those interactions, you realize you don’t have a bias.

True, you did lean towards Seonghwa and San, but then again, you always liked eyes like theirs or Hwa’s unisexual vibes, and even San's boyfriend code made you smile to yourself when he wandered into your daydreams. 

With that in mind, your friends got you a “Baby Atiny Bias package,” which included a photo facecard of San in a cute fuzzy kitty-looking pouch, a SANdeoki mini doll, and a Lightiny with Ateez logo keychain. You shocked them with your excitement to finally have something representing that you were and will always be an Atiny! 

After changing into concert-attending clothes and correcting the failed makeup job, the three of you decided to make your way to the Pop-Up, hoping to get some merch before the concert. This was your first pop-up, and it was at a place called Hello82! By the time you arrived, hardly anything was left, and your friends said you would have better picks at the arena. 

After grabbing some extremely needed coffee due to damn insomnia and the weird dreams of the eight men fawning over you, then some lunch, it was time to head to BMO stadium.

LA traffic sucked on a typical day; add in a K-pop concert, and the Dodgers playing just made it a bajillion times worse. However, parking was a breeze, which was surprising, to say the least. 

That’s when the good times came to a standstill. 

Literally. 

Over three hours of standing in the sun before you finally made it to the front of the merch line, they were sold out of everything you originally wanted besides the Seonghwa picket. So you settled on a sleeveless shirt and the picket.

You decided that you would have to get the Hwa one because you already had all the San stan stuff (s-cubed, you giggled to yourself), and you didn't save up enough to get all eight.

When the three of you needed clarification on which entryway was right, your friend asked a BMO employee, who guided you to the standard line. 

Well, they lied. 

After an hour of waiting in line to go to the standard entrance, you were informed that you actually had floor tickets that required you to enter the other end of the arena.

By this time, BE:FIRST had just taken to the stage, which pissed you off because you loved the new song they collaborated with Ateez on called Hush Hush, and you wanted to support them too. 

Finally making it into the arena, you are still walking to your seats as Ateez takes the stage in their white princely uniforms, making you want to melt on the spot. You weren't normally a lover of white, but you loved them in white. The demon-line looks like angels before their fall right now.

Luckily, the floor tickets came with someone to take you to your seats, so you could at least follow the worker while your eyes never left the stage as Crazy Form kicked off the show. 

Once in your seats, you never used them aside from the strange little intermission video thingies they did. You were standing, yelling, screaming, attempting to sing in Korean, and jumping up and down. You were amazed at the sold-out arena that they had. I'm so lucky to have a master ticket-grabber friend to get these seats.

Spinning around, you noticed another reason for the group to fall even harder: they had American Sign Language interpreters.

With how hard the base was in most of their songs, you knew they had to have a decent following from the Deaf community, and seeing them honor those Atinys almost made you want to cry. Your mom is hard of hearing, so you know ASL also, and your mom was a closet Atiny, but no one will ever know. 

They sang so many songs, and you knew all of them. EEEKK!!

Maybe you were a little obsessed with them over the last two years. But they were mixed in with others like Stray Kids, Astro, ZeroBaseOne, BigOcean, OmegaX, WaveV, and BTS. You had variety in K-pop and even started listening to J-pop and T-pop as well.

As for Western music, don’t ask about anything that happened or who was hot because you hadn’t a clue. Suddenly, the concertgoers around you start screaming their heads off, breaking you out of your inner discussion.

“Look, look! It’s San!” exclaimed your friend Kat while poking you in the side. Pointing over to the section next to you…

There

He

Was

San was there, like… right there, and he was walking this way while singing. 

OUCH

You grip your chest at the sudden tightness. Damn. You knew you would react if you ever got close to any of the K-pop idols you loved, but this was a bit extreme. You lived in LA County. You see actors all the time. It’s no biggy… so why?

Your eyes never left his form as he walked around the section you were in. He is so attentive to all of the Atiny that gain his attention, you notice. Being older than the 7/8s of the group and conscious of the age-haters out there, you sink back, letting the younger fans have their time.

Besides, you are a baby Atiny, and people like your friends Kat and Cindy have wanted to see them since they debuted. Plus, you also had a healthy understanding that they were just people who decided to share their talent with the world. That was another thing you learned living in LA for so long.

“Where did you go?” Cindy asked. “He was right here. You could have gotten some amazing pictures. I bet if you had shown him your SANdeoki, he would have given you at least a high-five.”

Standing back up, you looked around, “Cindy, I am not gonna take his time away from others that are bigger stans than I am. Maybe next time.”

“Yeah, sure, you just got nervous meeting one of your crushes,” Kat teased you. “If Seonghwa came down, you would have spontaneously combusted.”

“I think after the looks she gave Mingi, SanHwa now has competition for their spot as her bias,” Cindy laughed. 

“Oh, quite you two. You guys know that I have a hard time picking my favorites. I have an easier time picking ones that I would have a harder time meeting, like Jongho, Lee Know, or Seokjin. Those guys scare me with their seriousness.”

As the eight members said their goodbyes, your chest got even tighter, and your eyes started to well up. Why does it feel like you are leaving a part of yourself behind?

My goodness.

You had heard of post-concert depression, but you thought that was a joke. You attended a N*SYNC concert as a little girl and even a Creed Concert in college, but you never cried when the show was over. 

That is when you heard the laughing. Looking up at your friends, they are trying their best not to bust a gut as they watch you lamenting over the end of the nearly three-and-a-half-hour show. Glaring at them playfully, you stood up to leave but noticed a group of fans sticking around in a section near the stage.

“What is that for?” you ask.

“Oh, they must have VIP with send-off included,” offers Kat.

“What is a send-off?”

“It’s when the bands come out and meet fans, sign some stuff, take pictures, blah blah blah as they leave the venue they are in,” she clarifies. “Those were sold out before I could get them. Actually, all the VIP stuff was gone in the blink of an eye.”

“Coachella totally boosted their American Atiny numbers,” commented Cindy.

“I almost went to Coachella. You know Bethany? She works with Coachella and a few other festivals around here. She offered me to join the team for the first weekend because they were short-staffed, but I couldn’t swing it,” you said as you headed up the stairs to exit. “I wish I had said yes because she got to meet them all. She says that San and Wooyoung are a total couple, and the Twin Towers are too.”

“Well, I am glad you didn’t go, or I wouldn’t have been able to have our first Ateez concert as a memory, plus YOUR first K-pop concert EVER!!!” screamed Kat!

“Well, now that all of BMO knows,” giggled Cindy.

Laughing along with them, you rub your chest, still feeling a tightness you swear is pulling you to the stage area.

Ignoring the strange and slightly painful pull in your chest because you are not a delulu American sasaeng, you take a deep breath and focus on your photos.

“Holy Shit! I have over 700 photos and videos!”

“Yeah, and wasn’t she just mumbling about not being a sasaeng?” questions Cindy as you get to the car to go home. 

“Well, I have until the Stray Kids concert next year to go through them all and widdle it down to my favorites. That way, I can take 800 of Felix and Bang Chan,” you snark back. 

Buckling up your seat belt, you can’t help but keep your eyes on the BMO Stadium. Your chest gets tighter and tighter as you get farther away. Your mom has always mentioned following your instincts because they would know better than anything your mind will tell you.

So why are your instincts telling you that you left something important behind?

Next

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[ghouldump]

Preview of The Miseducation of Vampire Lestat

Sweet, sweet, sweet, each kiss held more passion than the previous. Your warm flesh made him feel less undead as you lay against his chest. Your heart ached, closing your eyes, missing the seconds of his beautiful face.

“Your father is here…along with the police,” he paused, his cold fingers brushing against your cheek.

“They’ll go away,” you smiled, going to kiss his lips, but he held your cheek, before sitting up.

“You have to go, ma belle,” he said, reaching for a cigarette out of the pack.

“Why? I don't want to leave,” you whined, pulling the sheet to cover your bare breast.

“It will cause too many issues for us both if you stay, the sun is out,” he said, as he lit the cigarettes, inhaling the smoke.

“If I leave, they won't let me see you again,” you said, frowning.

“I’ll come get you, but you have to leave with them,” he reassured.

“Tonight?” you asked, he couldn't help but smirk, he had made you this way.

“Tomorrow night,” he spoke, as you nodded in agreement.

Sighing, you laid back in the bed, a pout on your lips, as Lestat stared down at you. Why couldn't they let you be?

“Go on, get dressed, Chèrie,” he said.

Sighing again, you dramatically sat up, moving to change into the clothes that had been scattered across the suite. Lestat sat quietly, smoking, while he enjoyed the show.

Examining your appearance in the mirror, once more, you glanced at him. The sadness was still evident in your eyes, as you moved to straddle his lap.

“I don't want to leave you”

“I know,” he said, his free hand going around your waist, to comfort you.

“I’ll miss you”

“I already miss you,” he winked, pecking your lips, before sending you off to go down to the lobby.

He wanted you to stay, but he couldn't risk more than he already had. You were ready to abandon it all, the money, your life, and fame for him. You thought you could handle the baggage that came with the dark gift, but he didn't feel like it was the right time.

He was on the hit list of too many ancient vampires to make a new fledgling — he was still trying to look out for Louis. However, there wasn't a doubt in his mind, that when the timing felt suitable, you would be turned. You consumed his thoughts, just as he had done to you, and you would be the most exceptional companion.

Exiting the elevator, you didn't make it far before your father took large steps, pulling you close to examine you. Turning your head, and pulling up your sleeves, he seemed to be checking for any markings.

“He didn't bite you, did he?” he asked.

“No Daddy, I’m fine,” you grumbled.

“What the hell is wrong with you? Did I not tell you to stay away from him? You had your father and I worried sick,” your manager yelled.

“I know, I’m sorry Dad,” you said, catching him by surprise. He was puzzled, unsure if he needed to continue his role as your manager or your father. He and his husband had been beyond worried, their daughter missing for two days, not answering the phone, and now here you were being nonchalant.

“Alright, gentlemen, technically we can't proceed with any real charges because your daughter is legally an adult unless it was a kidnapping-

“I came here on my own,” you blurted out.

“Please Dad, just let it go, I won't see him again,” you cried out. A few people were watching from the lobby, confused and excited about seeing a permanent A-lister.

“No-

“Roman, she said she won't see him again”

“She was missing for two and a half days, we thought she was somewhere dead, Elliot,” you watched as your fathers argued.

“I promise, I won’t see him again, it was my idea to come here, he didn't even know I was coming,” you lied, crossing your legs, as you stood in between them.

“Fine, but don't think you're let off easy, you have come too far to throw it all away for some freak of nature”

“Roman, that's enough”

“I’m sorry for wasting your time, we won't continue with any charges,” he sighed, rubbing his temples trying to calm down.

“You're okay, you all have a nice evening,” the officer said before he left the three of you. As soon as he was gone, it was like a storm cloud hovered over your father, as he faced you.

“You are on lockdown, and I don't want to hear that you are an adult. As long as I am still your manager, and you are still under my roof, you follow my rules, let's go,” he ordered, as you nodded, doing the walk of shame ahead of them.

“You need to calm down, honey, we got her back, you’ll raise your blood pressure,” was the last thing you heard before the AirPods were shoved into your ears, trying to drown out any and every sound.

Your fathers hated Lestat and there seemed to be no amount of talking or proving that could be done to change their opinion. He wasn't good enough, outside of his freakish nature, for their mortal daughter.

The entire drive you listened to Lestat’s discography, taking in every lyric and instrument. Even when he acted as if he hated humans, he was incredibly intentional with his music to them. Spending time with him, you realized how very few knew him, the real him. How truly spontaneous he was, how he loved harder than ever imagined, how lonely he was, and how sensitive he could be. Just the thought of him made your heart flutter.

You couldn’t have run up to your room any quicker to get away from your father’s nagging. Locking the door, you went straight to take a shower. He’d leave you alone now, but if not tonight, then tomorrow Roman would have some serious rules around the house. He had always been more protective and strict, while Elliot trusted his baby girl and was more carefree. Leaving the steaming bathroom, you changed into the soft pajamas, climbing into bed, your journal in hand.

You make me patient, you make me kind

I’ve learned to be selfish, to take what is mine

Though we may suffer, I’ll envy them not

And endure until it happens

Cause he’s all that I’ve got, I tell him

Tell him I need him

Tell him I love him

And it’ll be alright

Your writing looked like chicken scratch, as you wiped the tears from your eyes. Your parents didn't want you together, your team, your label, it seemed like they were all against you. As much as you loved him, it was beginning to lead to an end.

Looking out the nearby window, you smiled thinking of the amount of memories you’ve created with him. Falling asleep, it couldn't have been more than a few hours, as you woke up to nightfall. The security alarm went off before it suddenly stopped. Sitting up, you faced the door, as the lock turned before the door opened.

Gasping, you stood up, as Lestat stood in the doorway. Rushing over, you wrapped your arms around him, as you jumped into embrace.

“What are you doing here?” you asked, your eyes searching his face.

“You asked me to come tonight,” he grinned. Smashing your lips into his, you moaned, as he walked over to the bed, laying you down. Breaking the kiss, he hovered over you, taking in your ethereal beauty.

“My fathers don't want me to see you anymore,” you told him, a single tear escaping your eye.

“It is good that you’ve always been the rebellious type,” he joked, but your face remained unchanged.

“Turn me, please, we can be together, no one could try to separate-

“It isn't time,” he told you, watching as your eyes went down to your fidgeting fingers.

“Right, sorry”

“Not even the sun or the moon could keep me too far away from you, you are mine, as I am yours, Do you understand?”

“Yes,” you said breathlessly.

“I love you”

“I love you too,” you said, just as he leaned down, kissing your lips. Hours of being tense vanished within a moment of being embraced in his arms.

“The door,” you said in between kisses, stopping as the door slowly shut and locked on its own. His gifts never failed to amaze you.

Reaching to unbutton your pajama top, you could see his fangs, visible in his mouth. Holding his jaw, you threw your head back, as he kissed along your neck. Your fingers run through the blonde tresses, biting back your moan.

“When it is time, I will make you into my companion,” he told you.

“I trust you,” you said, wincing for a moment, as the fangs plunged into your neck.

You would wait, wait until Lestat was ready to share the dark gift. He felt it wasn't time, and his withholding showed how much he cared for your well-being. You would wait, being content with now, cherishing every moment with him. Your dearest Lestat.

[cinnamonbear22]

oblivious love (c.s x reader)

chapter one

disclaimer!

yall i know they’re sober okay it’s just for the story, i have like seven chapters of this written up n i just wanted to see how one part would do so far :) i might not get everything accurate but it is just a story so don’t come for me ! plz!

tw

fem!reader, fluff, substance use

"did you want to stop anywhere else before we go?" nick turned to me as my bags were clustered together on my arms as he only had a few.

"i think im okay" i looked down at my purchases, not even remembering what i had bought within the last previous hours since i had just fully splurged without a second thought.

"i think so too" nick chuckled and pulled out his phone while we stood on the busy strip of shops and restaurants. "let me get an uber and we'll head back" he didn't look up from his phone as he spoke, his hair gently blew in the wind that had a hint of sea salt lingering behind it.

i felt exhausted. i had a busy day out with nick. we went to the beach, went shopping, ate dinner, basically spending our whole day together. but this wasn't even the most busy day i had within the last two weeks with them.

the sturniolo family and mine had grew up together for as long as i could remember, in fact, me and the triplets were only born a week or two apart. my mom and their mom were childhood best friends since seventh grade, so they had also grew up together as well. they’ve always had plans as little girls to have babies around the same time so they could through motherhood together. it was always a childhood fantasy until it had actually happened, and ever since i could recall me and the triplets have never been separated… up until they had moved out of our hometown and to los angeles. they had often come to visit, but unfortunately they were extremely busy now than ever since the fame had rapidly taken over.

but they had spoiled me and flew me out for three weeks with them after not seeing them for six months. it was an unexpected present they had sent me and watched me open it over facetime. and i'll never forget their and even my own reaction.

i was about a week and a half into my trip, and already i've been extremely spoiled and so nicely treated by them. it was nothing new, when we were younger they had always treated me like a princess and the princess treatment still carried over twenty years later.

after about five minutes our uber pulled up to the curb we were waiting at, and we carefully slid in with all of our items. we talked quietly amongst ourselves, both of us feeling extremely dreary from our long day out. "we should deliver ice cream or something" my eyes lazily scanned the crowded ice cream stand as we drove by it.

"you said you were full after dinner" nick averted his gaze from looking out his window and looked down at me, laughing softly.

"ice cream sound amazing though right?" i cocked a brow, knowing i am going to order the ice cream with or without him.

"you're right" he sighed in defeat, rubbing his mouth in a contemplative way. me and nick were always the closest out of the three. i loved them all with my entire heart, but nick was truly my best friend. we would be able to sit in silence for hours just comfortable with each other's presence, hanging out for hours on end and being able to talk about absolutely everything. "what are you going to wear to that party tomorrow?" he broke me out of my daydream as the roads became more familiar as we got closer to their home.

"i think that little black dress i bought would be nice, no?" i turned to him, sort of thinking about the idea.

"you can never go wrong with that" he agreed. "i'll wear all black with you if you end up wearing that" he offered, making me laugh a bit.

"that would be great" i said wittily, my dreary head shifted its way onto his shoulder. "i'm a little nervous for the party"

"how come?" he pursed his lips, his eyes now shifting down to connect with mine.

"well i wouldn't know anyone besides you guys" the uber stopped in front of the house so we can be let off. we politely thanked him before shuffling out, grabbing all of my bags with me.

"well, you don't need to know anyone else but us" nick reassured with a little smile as he began to punch in the gate code.

"i wouldn't want to be annoying though and just leech off of you guys the entire time" the gate opened and we started to walk through, quickly the front door swung open.

"trust me you aren't annoying anybody here (y/n)," nick continued to reassure me as my eyes watched matt slightly jog down the front porch steps and to us.

"why didn't you help her with her bags?" matt looked at nick and nick quickly defended himself from his brother.

"i tried to, but she wouldn't let me" nick locked the gate back up as matt grabbed some of the bags off my arms without even asking me.

"i could've carried them myself" i looked up at him with a smile.

"you looked like you were struggling on your way up" he didn't even look at me before taking the lead and walking back inside, me and nick following him. nick side eyed me behind matt's back with his lips curled into a scoff, making me slightly giggle.

"did you guys eat yet?" matt asked as i made my way to the guest room that was tucked away within the first floor.

"yes" i heard nicks footsteps go up the stairs and my other bags that matt was holding rustling behind me as i made my way to my room for the time being.

once i was in my room i set my bags down and sat down on the bed, watching matt set down everything else. "thank you" i reached down and began to untie my shoes, ready to get into my pajamas after the long day.

"of course" he smiled gently and looked at me for a few long seconds before speaking again. "chris was looking for you all day today" matt rubbed his eyes with a slight smile.

"really?" my brows furrowed together but i couldn't help that i was a bit excited from hearing that. the name 'chris' even has me in a chokehold. we all grew up together, we grew up the same way, we all seen each other just as frequently as the other, besides nick, who i was inevitably closer with and hungout much more one on one, but even ever since we were little kids, me and chris's bond has always been slightly different, and everyone would be able to tell that no matter who you are. but i would never let myself act on those different feelings. i never wanted the ruin the dynamic between all of us.

"mhm," matt hummed, making his way to the door. "let me know if you need anything" he shut it behind him as i stared down at my feet for a moment.

i pushed myself off my bed and made my way towards the bathroom that was connected to the guest room and began to do my nightly routine, thinking about what matt had said but not taking it too far into consideration. i put my glasses on as the last step of my routine and quickly changed out of my clothes and into my pajamas, plaid fleece bottoms and a little tank top.

i slipped on my beige slippers and grabbed my phone before heading to nicks room, but before i could even open my door three knocks startled me. "can i come in?" chris's voice was muffled on the other side of the door. i opened the door which he seemed surprised, his eyes were extremely droopy, his hair was messy, his pajama bottoms sagged slightly revealing his boxers and he didn't have a shirt on. "oh..." he took a step back. i smiled and moved out of the way, giving him entrance into my temporary bedroom. "where have you been all day?" he asked, launching himself onto my bed and instantly cuddling up in the blankets.

"i was out with nick, i told you that, but i guess it just turned into an all day thing" i turned around and looked at him, and now that he was in the light i could see his eyes were a bit pink as well. "are you only coming to me because you just smoked?" i still stood and watched him as he got comfortable.

"no, no, no" his droopy eyes quickly went wide and he sat up, "i missed you today that's all, and i just happened to smoke. coincidence"

"got it" i couldn't help but smile at him and i made my way towards the edge of the bed, keeping our distance although i felt my skin on fire. i wish that the feelings would go away, but after several years they never had.

"you got a little sunburn on your cheeks" he reached his hand up and gently brushed his thumb across my cheek.

"is it bad?" i pulled myself away from his hand and touched it with my own, feeling the slightly irritated skin. i didn't even notice it in the bathroom.

"no, not at all" his tired eyes locked with mine. "it's cute" he grinned, making me smile too. he knew what he was doing. i felt like he had known i had a crush on him, but sometimes i think he's completely oblivious to it. i am sort of hoping he's more on the oblivious side.

it wasn't unnoticed that i would get a little more nervous whenever he was around, a little more aware. with matt and nick i was fine but with chris, even though i knew i could be myself around him, i still felt a small edge.

"do you really think so" i said sarcastically and put my hand under my chin, posing my face so he could see all sides.

"i really do" he chuckled, putting his hands behind his head now as he laid back down. the soft light in my room prominently brought out his light muscle tone along his strong facial features. "what are you going to wear to the party?" he asked me, referring to tomorrow.

"i bought a little black dress today" i looked behind me at the plethora of bags scattered around my room.

"that's always a classic" he nodded, the corners of his lips upturned.

"i spent so much money..." i sighed, still looking at the bags.

"did you use my card like i told you to?" he asked, now propping himself up on his elbow.

"as guilty as i am, i did" i scratched the back of my head and looked at him, his face washed over with excitement.

"well technically..." he now had deceitful look in his eyes, making my stomach churn. "i bought all these clothes so you have to give me a haul"

"you want a haul?" i couldn't help but to giggle a bit.

"please" his icy blue eyes looked up at me as i began to stand up, sending chills through every part of my body. "especially the victoria secret bag, i want a try on haul"

"cut it out" i turned my head to him as he was smirking at his little remark. "thank you by the way, you seriously did not have to give me any money"

"i wanted to" he watched me carefully now as i picked up all the bags and set them down on the bed. "so what did you get?" he sat himself up now and leaned against the headboard. "show me the dress"

i shuffled and dug around into some bags until i found the dress, his face immediately dropped as soon as i pulled it out. "what? is it ugly?" i was taken aback from his reaction.

"no not at all" he was looking between me and the dress. "it's just that..." he hesitated before speaking making me more nervous.

"just say it! am i too big for this dress? will it not compliment me?" i started to panic now, of course my thoughts quickly spiraling. that was nothing new to me.

"no! absolutely not!" he jumped up in quick defense, still looking at the dress. "it just looks like the size of a t-shirt…" he mumbled so softly, making me laugh that all the anticipation was for nothing. "it's not funny, it's too short" he started to laugh along with me, snatching the luxurious dress away from my hands. "are you sure this says dress on it? are you sure you didn't get it in the shirt section?" he started to look at it closely now, looking at the tags and everything. "it's so silky" he started to rub it against his face like a child with a blanket. "this is silk right?"

"stop it" i took it back from him with a smile, his eyes were still somewhat in a trance on the dress. "yes it is"

"i'll have to keep an eye on you all night if you wear that" he huffed, running his fingers through his hair. "are you going to wear like," his gaze averted up to my eyes, and i held it strongly. "wear a jacket..? like one that goes to the floor and you just button it up all the way and the dress underneath it so technically you're still wearing it out"

"i'm in los angeles, i didn't think i needed a jacket" i scoffed, neatly laying the dress across the desk chair that was in the room. he looked like he was in deep thought now. he licked his lips and wiped his mouth, all of his subconscious habits coming into play. i was now standing at the foot of my bed as he looked contemplated, but i was ready to go into more of the haul.

"nick let you buy that dress? for how short it is?" his pink eyes looked me up and down making me tense.

"christopher" i snapped at him, shooting my eyes up to meet his. "it's not that short"

"what shoes are you wearing?" he asked. he crossed his arms in such a graceful manner, accentuating his chest.

"i was just going to show you" i dug into another bag and pulled out a shoe box. inside the box revealed gorgeous, sleek, simple, shiny black stiletto heels. "what do you think?"

"i think that maybe with those on you'll look a normal height" he snarked, earning glare.

"seriously?" i cocked my head to the side, challenging him to see if he'd go any further.

"sorry" he pressed his lips together to try and mask his smile. "all i know is that you're definitely going to be the center of attention"

"yeah right" i put the heels back in the box and had also set them down by my dress. "im not going to know anyone there besides you guys, ill be following you guys around like a lost puppy" i retorted, moving some of the bags aside on my bed and sitting back down.

"there's no issue with that" he seemed a bit relieved taking in the fact that i would be near him all night. "i would be glad to accompany you to this party" he bowed his head like a prince would and spoke in an extremely formal accent, earning a small laugh. "i'll wear all black too"

"i think nick already is" i remembered him saying something about that in the uber.

"but i want to match with you though" he slightly whined and pouted like a child.

"well that has to be arranged between you guys" i put my hands up in defense and his eyes seemed to drift from mine and fixate my chest area. "what are you doing?" i covered my chest with my hands, watching his eyes carefully.

"i was looking at your necklace" he scoffed, and i quickly set my arms back down.

"oh" i giggled lightly and scooted a bit closer to him. "do you like it?" i asked him as his fingers gently brushed against my chest, and he held the small gold lion pendant.

"i do" he looked up softly at me. "did your boyfriend back at home get it for you?"

"you're such a dick" i slapped his arm away and a smile slowly crept up on his face. "me and that guy dated for a month, he cheated on me anyway, you know this..." i felt humiliated. "why do you still tease me for it?"

"because i told you he was a walking red flag" chris leaned back against the headboard, crossing his arms like how he had them before.

"please forgive me for being young and naive" i said in a snide tone, shaking my head. "what about you?" i asked him with a stern tone.

"what?" he cocked a brow.

"have you been with anyone within the last two years?" i asked him, sort of hoping the answer would only go one way.

"absolutely not" he shook his head, still holding eye contact with me. "(y/n) you would've known"

"well," i placed my hands in my lap. "do you have any interest in anyone? you've had to have met so many people in l.a."

"why are you asking me these questions?" his face began to hue a pink, just like his eyes. it gave me a small ego boost, seeing that i could also make him nervous.

"what? you can bust my balls all you want but i can't?" i teased him and he bit his lip nervously.

"she's going to be at the party tomorrow" he said, making my heart sink to the bottom of my stomach. i always set myself up to self sabotage, but it's better for me to find out from him than anyone else.

"yeah?" i kept a smile on my face, staying strong.

"mhm" he hummed, licking his lips and keeping his gaze in my eyes. a small bit of tension built up in the room and i felt like it was my fault.

"then you better not match with me because she might take it the wrong way" i anxiously began to fidget with the rings on my fingers.

"no, she better like it" he quickly came back making me a little confused but still a bit dejected.

"you're bold christopher" i slightly tilted my head to the side, taking in his dominate tone.

"i really wish i was" he sighed and stared at me with a slight look of regret in his eyes. it was a little off putting since it was hard to read him in this moment, the tension now flooded the room and it felt like i was drowning in it.

"then why aren't you?" i pushed him a little further.

"because i'm scared" he still looked strongly at me.

"scared of what?" my fingers made their way back to fidgeting with my rings. the vibe in this room was so off putting yet i still feel extremely relaxed with chris.

"rejection" his eyes became even more droopier as he spoke. "commitment"

"chris you know you could have any girl that you want" i couldn't help but to laugh a tiny bit, chris, scared of rejection? seriously? i understand commitment, he's always had an issue with that.

"there's only one i want" he held his pointer finger up in my face, indicating the number one.

"well," i softly pushed his large hand away from my face, but he ended up resting it in my lap on top of my hands lazily. "why not make your move at the party tomorrow? you said she'd be there right?" his hand started to feel all the rings on my finger, sending shivers down my spine with how gentle he's being.

"i will" he stared at our hands mingling, looking deep in thought. "you mess with your rings a lot, even the other day in the restaurant when you were ordering when we all went out to eat"

"i guess it's a nervous habit" i tried to pull my hand out of his soft grip, but he harshly grabbed it back.

"i wasn't done looking yet" he didn't even look up at me, just softly held my hands with his one.

"i think you're just trying to hold my hands" i grinned and looked up at him, and his eyes returned back to mine.

"so what?" his head lazily tilted to the side. "is it okay?" i nodded and watched his every move. "just like when we were younger" he chuckled to himself.

"i know" i sighed, laughing at the memories. "you did not let go of my hand when you were a toddler" he reached his other hand over now and started to play with both my hands. "i was dragged along everywhere with you"

"you wear so many rings" he held up my wrist to his face, inevitably pulling me in closer to him. "you don't like being dragged along with me?" his voice became tired now, but it was even more attractive.

"what more could i want in life?" i retorted, earning a small, sleepy evil eye from him. "you look so tired"

"im tired of you" he said scornfully, causing me to withdraw my hands from him and lean back with fake shock.

"you're extremely sassy tonight" i gave him a fake sad look and his face softened.

"i didn't mean it, come on" he quickly reached over and grabbed my arm, yanking me towards him and quickly engulfing me into a big hug. "you know you're my favorite person" he mumbled into my hair as i laughed at the sudden movements, being a bit taken back.

"you're my favorite boy ever" i told him, and i couldn't help but to wrap my arms around him as well. i was so happy to be in l.a. with all of them again. ever since they've been moving around back and forth i always felt a little empty without them in my hometown. i know that they were always one call away, but it would never be the same than me riding my bike to their house like i did when i was young, knowing i could go to them whenever i needed to.

"what about nick?" chris didn't let me go, but i wasn't upset about it. his hugs were always my favorite.

"that's our secret then" i pulled away from him as his arms still lingered around my middle, and we sat there just staring at each other for a moment.

"can we have a sleepover?" he asked, excitement filled his tired eyes.

"i guess" i laughed a little, my hands subconsciously rubbed his arm that was resting on me. ever since we were children chris has always been touchy with me, never in a weird way, so i never really accounted on that for a yes or no confirmation if he had similar feelings for me or not.

"hooray" he geek-ily smiled at me, earning a little laugh. "we haven't had a sleepover since sixth grade"

"i don't know what you're talking about, i was practically at your house every weekend in high school sleeping over" i cocked my brow, taking my hand away from his arm.

"yeah but you were always with nick" he rubbed his eyes with one of his hands, the other still loosely holding me.

"we're you jealous?" i teased him, but he just rolled his eyes.

"really?" he said in a dull tone, his eyes looking like they were trying to fight awake.

"i'm teasing you" i couldn't help but to feel the sleepiness as well.

"tell me about it" he groaned, covering his eyes with both his hands now and he looked up at the ceiling.

i giggled a little and swung my legs over the mattress, and started to move off all the rest of my bags off the bed that i hadn't shown him yet. "aren't you going to show me everything?"

"tomorrow, i'm tired" i set down all my bags on the floor and tossed him the television remote. "turn something on" he caught it with ease and i made my way to the light switch.

the only light that filled the room now was the t.v. and the moon spilling in from outside. it was such a calming scene, especially with chris in the room. as nervous as he made me he will always, always put me at ease.

i crawled into my bed, keeping as much distance as i could from chris. i didn't want to seem like i was pushing it at all, or annoying him in anyway. i pulled the blanket up to my chin, tucking myself in next time him, grabbing hold of the teddy bear that was gifted to me several years ago from the triplets and hugging it to my chest. "you still have that?" chris's groggy voice was close to me now.

"of course" my eyes focused on the t.v., seeing he had put on some movie. i wasn't sure what it was though. i was too tired to care right now.

"you took it with you on your trip?" he still sat up against the headboard, slouching a little as he looked down at me.

"it's like my security blanket" i looked up at him, his face being dimly lit by the television.

"awe that's adorable" he cooed at me, a slight pout formed on my lips. "why don't you hold me like that?" at this point he had to be taunting me.

"i don't think you're a teddy bear" my fingers laced in the teddy bears slightly matted fur.

"let me me be your teddy bear" he sang to me in his sleepy voice, referring to the elvis song.

"oh my goodness" my face was flush, but im sure the sunburn covered it up.

"please" he begged, pouting his lip out and widening his eyes like a puppy. i knew he was just high, and he probably wouldn't mention any of this in the morning, but it was also just how our dynamic worked.

"c'mere" i set my teddy aside freeing the space and opened up my arms to welcome him.

"yes" he said joyful to himself, quickly shifting himself on top of me. i grunted a little at the weight, since he plopped himself on me without any hesitation.

i wrapped my arms around his neck, hugging him slightly as he got comfortable with his head on my chest. his fluffy hair tickled my face and i gently pushed it away with my fingers. "you're such a baby" my fingertips softly traced along his back, my eyes shifted to the screen.

"remember in middle school at that one little party we went to" he murmured into my skin, his hot breath against me made my hair standup.

"not really" one of my hands began to play with his soft hair. "that was so long ago, how do you even remember middle school"

"i don't know" he mumbled.

"why?" i was talking softly now.

"i remember it was the first girl-boy party we ever went to and how exciting it was" he rambled with slurred words here and there. "and we played spin the bottle remember?"

"sort of..?" i tried to dig deep into the memory but it wasn't really anywhere to be found.

"it was your turn and you were so nervous" he chuckled lowly, but i was still confused to the point he was trying to make. "but it landed on me"

the embarrassing memory instantly came back.

"oh god" i sighed, rolling my eyes a little at the story. "why are bringing this up?"

"i don't know i just remembered it" i could tell he was lying. i didn't want to push the conversation further. "was i a bad kisser? is that why you don't remember?"

"christopher..!" i whisper yelled at him, taking my hands out of his hair and off him and tried to push his shoulders off me but he didn't budge. he probably had felt the heat radiating off my body from how embarrassed i was.

"what?" he chuckled slightly at my reaction, resisting to move off of me. "put your hand back in my hair please" he mumbled but i didn't listen to him. "please, it feels so good" he whined wearily, my heart began to pick up at the choice of words he used. "remember when you used to do my hair as a kid"

"why do you remember so much?" i put my hands back in his hair, softly pressing my nails into his scalp and lacing my fingers through his locks.

"god, i don't know but i just love this feeling" he groaned, nestling more in my chest. "i missed you" he blurted out, his eyes shut all the way now. he talks so much, i wouldn't doubt that he sleep-talks as well. but i never ever minded it. the way he could change the subject and talk to people and never make it awkward was just such a strong quality of his. "i miss being at home and you're so close to me-" he cut himself off quickly. "well i meant us"

"i missed you too chris" i let my eyes fall since they were fighting to stay awake at this point. "a lot"

he continued to talk, but it was hard for me to process what he was saying. he was slurring and mumbling, and i was drifting in and out of consciousness, responding to him with only 'mhm's and 'yeah's. but his voice was lulling me to sleep, so i didn't mind. i would never mind moments like this.

[lisbeth-kk]

May Prompts (15) Nightmare

The Luckiest Girl in the World (chapter 15)

Summary: Rosie tells us about her family's sanctuary that is 221B, but also about wars over board games. In the end, it's the story about someone else who also needs a safe haven.

Fifteen Years Old

I felt oddly protective of our home from an early age, and I didn’t want it invaded by my friends. Not that I was ashamed of all the bric-a-brac, Papa’s experiments, or how different it was to other homes I’d visited. It was just...our space, a safe haven where we all could lower our guards, Papa in particular. Over the years, his fame had increased exceedingly, and his derisive façade kept journalists and fans at bay. The moment he entered 221B, he discarded said façade by hanging his coat on the peg.

Another thing to consider, were the battles that always ensued whenever one of us challenged the others to a board game. Having an outsider witnessing that…well, we’d surely be sectioned for life if that were to occur. 

(More likely, the person would be granted vicious dreams for eternity.)

But as Papa points out; there’s always something. In this context, someone.  My friend Liwia. Her parents were Polish, and moved to England two years before Liwia was born. They were Catholics, and having to adjust to a society that was more liberal toward queer people than Poland, took its time. When Liwia came out to them as a lesbian the year prior, they’d tried to pin it on her friendship with me. I was after all related to quite a few of the sort and Liwia’s parents seemed to believe the ludicrous lie that queerness was contagious.

It took them some months to get over it, but once they realised that Liwia still was her normal self, they discarded the original idea of sending her to Poland to live with her strictly religious grandparents. Neither of the Barczykowskis was prepared when said grandparents announced that they were visiting London that summer, staying for at least a fortnight. 

***

Dad and I were in the middle of a Scrabble war, when Papa came home. Not that we realised it at the time. We were too engrossed in arguing.

“It’s bloody unfair to use all the medical terms and diseases you can come up with to win, you know!” I exclaimed accusatory.

“Oh, come now, Rosebud,” Dad teased, looking as pleased as the cat that ate the canary.

“Don’t you dare Rosebud me,” I said through clenched teeth. 

Dad only used that pet name when we were at war over the board games, and it rubbed me up the wrong way.

“Children,” Papa chastised, barely able to suppress his glee.

“You’re home,” we said in unison.

I waited for the inevitable eyeroll and his obviously, but none came.

“We have a guest,” Papa said and waved a hand, and that’s when I saw Liwia standing by the sofa wringing her hands, a look of despair in her eyes.

I leapt to my feet and walked over to hug her tight.

“What’s wrong?” I whispered into her hair.

She explained about her grandparents, and with just one look over at Papa, receiving a nod, I turned back to assure my friend that she could stay at Baker Street for as long as she needed, if her biased grandparents started to make her life a living nightmare.

“Thank you, Mr. Holmes and Doctor Watson,” Liwia said politely.

I could literally see the relief wash over her, the tension in her shoulders dissipating and a tiny smile forming on her lips.

“Please, call us John and Sherlock,” Dad said. 

Then he turned his attention to me with a devilish grin.

“Does this mean you declare defeat, Rosebud?”

“You wish!” I snarled and left Liwia’s side to go into battle with my father.

(Before you go all bananas on me - this will continue tomorrow...)

Also available on AO3

@calaisreno @totallysilvergirl @keirgreeneyes @raina-at @helloliriels

More tags in the replies.

[floofanflurr]

Thoughts on Asgore? Just curious since a lotta people are divided on "divorced haha man" and "mass murderer"

Ohohoho this is very much a slippery slope for me! And a topic I have many opinions on. Thanks for the ask!

Please note for anyone that does not have the energy to read something like this, that this is overall, a critical piece of Asgore. (though not shamelessly bashing him.)

I'm prefacing this to anyone reading - I am not looking to fight, and I will not engage in any arguments around this. I don't have the energy to engage like that. I will delete/block any comments looking to start an argument and move on.

So here's my character analysis of Asgore under the cut, and my personal feelings about goat dad.

Asgore and his incomplete character arc, and why he honestly kind of got shafted:

I think Asgore is an interesting character, but I just... really struggle to like him.

"But Floo!" you may say "Why do you like Undyne, and the other monsters that killed/hurt Frisk/the other kids but not Asgore? Why is he different?"

I debated on that long and hard myself for a while. Why does Asgore rub me the wrong way when Undyne doesn't? Could it be because he is the reason everyone else is doing what they are, because he ordered it? But no, that didn't feel quite right.

And then I realized that it's because Asgore never truly grew as a person. There are some fics out there that I've read where I really do like Asgore. He's a fuzzy goat dad, and I just adore him! But when I examined the differences between those fics and canon, that's when it really stood out to me about WHY I don't like him in canon.

Every other character in the game gets growth that was (while caused by your/frisk's actions) still decided on by themselves. Let's go in order of the decisions these characters made that showcased their growth (in a pacifist run)-

Toriel - She, after having been given suitable time to ruminate, realizes that what she is doing will not work and tears herself out of her isolation to go after the last child and protect them. Her passivity wasn't saving anyone, so she changes herself, grows, and goes to protect them. (it's late, but it DOES happen)

Papyrus - I think the place he really shines in a pacifist/neutral run is when he beats Frisk 3 times and lets them go, but his character arc is all the same, anyway, even if you do beat him. Namely, that he lets them go. He could keep going, he could keep fighting, but he realizes that his want for friends and fame wasn't worth hurting someone. (even if that's not directly how he phrases it.)

Even if you outlast him and beat him the traditional way, he still decides to use his last special attack instead of fighting you until you're down. It's pretty clear he could have kept going if he wanted to.

Undyne - She, like Papyrus (and almost every other monster) has the character growth of letting Frisk go. A decision she actively makes. When Frisk saves her in hotland, pouring water over her head, she could have continued on with the chase, and kept going. But she didn't - she was honorable and conceded her defeat.

Mettaton - Same song and dance as Papyrus and Undyne (I love this character growth, and that's not to diminish ANYONES. They all have different flavors and motivations for going after Frisk that need confronted, even if the action is similar.) But he lets frisk go and realizes that the people underground need him more than anyone above ground. And also learns to touch base with his family a bit more, and value his friends/family more.

Alphys - Alphys decides to confront her crimes and reveal herself! There's still a bit of external pressure here (the "I KNOW WHAT YOU DID" note from Flowey) but still, she didn't have to come clean. But despite everything, she did, and she faced her wrongdoings and also told the people she loved.

Flowey - Do I need to explain this one? There's so many character essays on him (and Alphys tbh LMAO) Long story short, he learns to move on and let go. (and also broke the barrier and released the souls)

So now we move to the crux of the issue. Asgore.

He had a HELL of a character arc building up! So many flaws and bad decisions! We know he's kind, and a pushover, but also responsible for all of this hurt and death of children. (Yes, he had reasons, but that doesn't change his actions.) To be honest, it's the kind of character arc I love. Someone who has caused harm, learning to grow and be a better person. (Cough cough, Heart on the Table, cough cough)

...But he never actually got to the "better person" part.

We know monsters in Undertale are flawed. It's why it's such a great game! So many characters have done so much bad, but! The core of the game is that anyone can be a good person if they try! Look at all these people learning and growing, and being better people than they were before!

But the true pacifist ending kinda shafted Asgore, to be honest. He's a coward, and he never really has to face what he's done. He never decides to just... stop. To face his crimes and the world he's shaped around him.

If he had, independently of others, decided to spare Frisk, that would be one thing. But he didn't - it wasn't until Toriel showed up, and then all of Frisk's friends that he stopped.

Asgore's core conflict was that he was doing something he hated and he knew was bad, but he couldn't stop because how would everyone else react? His people needed him to do this bad thing.

A completed character arc for him, from a story telling perspective, would have had him stop what he was doing, while still under the impression that this would be a hard decision, and that everyone would hate him for it.

(A bed he made for himself! Through his action and inaction, he stoked monsterkind's hatred for humanity back up. There is a much larger discussion to be had around this topic, also how Chara was treated by him and monster kind (also his hand in Chara and Asriel's death) and many more factors. I am aware this is a highly debated topic, and I don't have the energy to fight it, so I will leave it at that.)

Regardless on if you agree if that would be a good or bad decision on his part, that would have been character growth - basically, Asgore having to face all of the accumulation of his cowardice and actions.

But he didn't. He didn't back down until he was basically told "hey yeah, so we all like this kid so you don't have to kill them."

He never wanted to kill them! That was never the issue! The issue was that he was willing to kill them anyway. And if Frisk's friends and his ex wife hadn't shown up and said "hey so we actually DONT want you to kill this kid" he would have! He was willing to kill a child because other people wanted him to, and we never get to see him overcome that hurdle of not killing a child despite other people wanting him to.

We can talk about the potential ending where he offers Frisk his soul, but even then, he still never actually confronts his actions. He's still unwilling to face all of the people he's harmed. (and YES allowing and ENCOURAGING his citizens to murder children is harming them, too. Especially because monsters don't see humans as people. (another essay I don't have time to get into right now, but is based on canon fact))

So... Yeah. I think Asgore has a lot of wonderful conflict baked into him, which is something I love in a character. He's torn, and a coward, and a father, and a broken ruler and king who is doing what he thinks his people want. But it's frustrating to me because he never got the character arc he deserved, and never got the chance to grow into a better person like everyone else in Undertale gets.

I do actually enjoy writing about him... and drawing him too on occasion! (though he's hard to draw) and ASGORE and Bergentrückung are actually my favorite songs in the soundtrack since they are filled with so much emotion. He really is a delightfully conflicted character and that conflict and hurt and pain in a character is addicting to me.

If he had a resolved character arc in game... well, to be honest, he'd probably be my favorite character??? Like, maybe even more than Papyrus (before the hyperfixation took hold, of course. That's a beast you can't reason with.)

But alas, it is what it is, and Asgore never grew. He's stuck being the same monster he was from the very beginning.

Thanks again for the ask and sorry you got a whole ass essay in response lol! I have many feelings about this game and the characters in it, Asgore included.

(Also, to anyone reading, I am aware what I have stated is simply my opinion, and many people have different ones. My opinion has no more value than any other persons.)

Another disclaimer - I love Undertale, and all of it's characters and everything that went into it, and while there are things that I feel about Asgore's character arc, I love and appreciate the way the game played out in actuality, and I wouldn't change a thing about it. Toby wrote a masterpiece, and is not only allowed, but should write characters the way he wants to. Who cares if it's not textbook?

Have a cookie for making it this far:

🍪

(I was gonna drop an Asgore sketch but HOLY HECK it was not cooperating.)

[thechaoticdruid]

Seriously, now!?

Astarion x Named!Tav

Plot: (Set in late act 1 early act 2) After causing a scene, embarrassing and being shouted at by their own resident wizard, Winnie storms off alone to sulk. Her monthly bleeding is upon her and is making everything seem so much worse! But perhaps her vampiric lover can make it all better?

Warnings/content: Period comfort fic (because I needed it), emotional MC, soft Astarion, Galeshaming (I'm sorry for constantly bullying Gale), Winnie is honestly being a bit petty, but Astarion doesn't care really, he's on her side anyway, angst, fluff, comfort, a wee bit of smut at the end, oral (female receiving), MDNI, possibly ooc moments, possible grammar/ spelling mistakes.

After finding only disappointment and danger from their failure at the githyanki creché, Winnie and her merry band of weirdos were now turning towards the mountain path that would lead them onward to Moonrise. They'd run into a little confrontation on the way, had to fight some undead baddies and then met face to face with the famed 'Elminster.' Winnie had no idea who he was, nor did she really care. All she was concerned with was that this guy came into her camp ate all HER cheese and then told her friend his ex wanted him to go kill himself. Needless to say the young druid was not that impressed. Despite dreaming of being a wizard as a child, Winnie had never heard of this man before. The village she was born in had been pretty cut off from the rest of the world so all the stories of heroes from all over were never told to the children living there.

"I can't believe you! Picking a fight with an old man." Gale exclaimed looking over at Winnie with disapproval.

"Last I thought you said the old man was the strongest wizard in the world." Winnie tilted her head in confusion.

"That's no excuse to get into a fist fight with him! Didn't your parents teach you to respect your elders?!" Gale shouted.

"My Gran taught me to kick ass if someone takes what is mine. Especially my food." Winnie huffed and crossed her arms. Granted Archdruid Winnifred the first was known for being a crazy old crone with a fiery temper and some outdated views. She also seemed much too calm when her husband apparently died in an owlbear attack.

Ah, but Winnie still missed her.

"Oh come on wizard, Winnie's little show was absolutely hilarious! Ahaha!" Astarion giggled. The elven vampire had been watching the chaotic scene unfold with a shit eating grin the entire time. The fact that the druid used none of her powers or weapons just made it all the better. Hells she even bit the old man.

"Hilarious!? She attacked one of the greatest wizards this world has ever known over cheese!!! A child has more restraint for gods' sake!"

"Oh, suck my dick!" Winnie snarled, quite literally making a wolfish growl at the bearded man before stomping off. Gale rubbed his temples before slumping off to his own tent.

"Winnie is rather eccentric at the best of times, but usually not this vicious." Shadowheart piped up, stepping over to join the vampire spawn.

"She has a temper, but I agree she's been acting more irritable than usual. You wouldn't know anything about this would you fangs?" Karlach asked looking over at Astarion.

"Must you assume whenever something goes wrong it's my fault?" Astarion crossed his arms.

"No one is accusing you of anything yet, but you have practically been glued to Winnie's backside as of late." Shadowheart raised an eyebrow.

"Just wanted to know if you knew if there was something going on." The tiefling female added. Astarion rolled his eyes before looking over in the direction of where Winnie had wandered off.

"Oh there is something going on, not that I'm the type to gossip about a woman's personal matters." Astarion ran a hand through his ivory curls.

"Fangs, we all know that's complete bullshit." Karlach looked at him with an unamused expression.

"Well, not about this! It's different. Even I have limits you know." Astarion murmured. He was well aware of Winnie's predicament, and if he had been completely honest he definitely would have gossiped about this sort of thing if it had been anyone else. "But perhaps I can go and calm our feisty little wolf down." The high elf suggested, hoping to keep the others from asking any more questions.

"Alright I'll go try to console Gale I think he's screaming into his pillow again...." Karlach mentioned before her and Shadowheart walked off.

Astarion looked over to where Winnie had wandered up, finding her curled up on her bed-roll under some trees. Winnie whimpered and groaned, clutching her lower stomach in pain.

"In a spot of bother are we?" Astarion looked down at her.

"Leave me alone Astarion!" Winnie snapped before covering herself in her blankets.

"Oh come on, don't be like that. I'm only here to help." Astarion sat down on the bed-roll next to her. "I know you're still mad that the mean wizard yelled at you, but if you want I can go and break his legs? Would that make you happy, dear?" Astarion practically cooed, a small smile formed on his lips as he ran a hand over her back.

"Maybe...." Winnie mumbled and glanced up at him. Astarion smirked, "I thought so." He gently caressed her head.

"I'm.....Sorry....I...I haven't been myself lately...." Winnie confessed before wincing again in pain.

"I know. I can smell the blood..." Astarion said calmly. Winnie turned bright red before hiding her face in her pillow.

"This is so embarrassing!" Winnie whimpered into her pillow. Astarion sighed before laying beside her.

"Well if it's any consolation...You smell absolutely delicious." He grinned looking over her before receiving a light smack on the chest.

"Don't be gross!" Winnie huffed, and then looked up at Astarion who was just staring at her. "I don't want to think about anything.... going on down there....right now... It's too uncomfortable..." She mumbled, before burying her head back into her pillow. Astarion frowned. Comfort was really not his thing. Whenever Winnie was feeling down, usually due to insecurities about her appearance he'd just bed her, compliment her and she'd be happy, but this was different. If she didn't want to be touched he was a little bit at a loss of what to do. Still, these gods damned feelings urged him to try something. Despite his best efforts to avoid it, he was growing attached to her.

"Come back to my tent darling." Astarion whispered as he pushed some of the druid's messy hair behind her ear.

"Astarion I just told you-"

"Not for that. I promise, just let me take care of you." Astarion sat up, looking down at the human female with a softening gaze. Winnie turned towards him and sighed.

"Fine..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Winnie followed Astarion back to his tent with her things, she waited a moment for him to go inside and to take care of a few things before entering and setting her stuff down. She placed her bedroll and blankets down before noticing him placing pillows down around her stuff. She stared at him, curiously. Was this all some kind of plot? She wasn't so sure why he seemed to care this much. Astarion would usually mock someone else's pain. Sure the two of them had been sleeping together, but Astarion was quick to return to his usual apathetic self once out of the bedroom so to speak. Mocking any acts of heroism she did.

"Wait here I'll be back." Astarion ruffled her hair with a soft smile. Winnie laid there on the bedding, nuzzled her face into one of the cushy pillows Astarion had set out for her.

He'll probably just want to feed on me later.... That's it.

Winnie reached into her pack and took out a small worn out green dragon plush holding it to her chest for comfort as she curled up.

The others probably made him go after me because I was acting like a lunatic.....They all probably hate me now....

Tears began form in the corners of her eyes as she slid there. Winnie laid her head on one of the pillows before taking in the nice earthy scent of bergamot and rosemary. Her heart ached as she thought about the elf. The druid knew in her heart that it was meaningless, that he was just using her for his own gain, but she just smiled and went along with it, wanting to stay lost in him for as long as she could. With Astarion she felt something no one had ever given her before. She felt wanted. Even if it was all just a beautiful lie.

Winnie huffed, squeezing her eyes shut as tears forced their way out and began to drip down her cheeks.

She could see it happening almost vividly how he'd approach her eventually after everything at Moonrise was settled and done with.

"What were you expecting, some fairytale prince?" He'd laugh at her naivety and shake his head when began to tear up. "This is what I do. I give you a moment of escape with a world endingly beautiful vampire and you satisfy my needs. Cheer up. There's really no one better you could have spent your first time with. Especially with how homely you are."

Winnie sobbed quietly into the pillow. Her mind running wild with self loathing thoughts, imagining several different ways Astarion would break it off with her. Eventually after a while the tent flap opened and she felt a breeze brush over her cheek though she refused to look over. Astarion slipped in, carrying a well stuffed sack over his shoulder. His crimson eyes gazed over Winnie's plump curvaceous form as he sat down beside her on the bed-roll. Astarion set down the sack near the entrance of the tent before looking over Winnie further.

"Darling, I'm back." He said softly before noticing the little stuffed dragon in her arms. "What's this? Really dear a stuffed animal? You're twenty three years-" Astarion stopped his snarky comment as he noticed Winnie's red puffy eyes, her nose sniffling.

"Winnie....Did Gale come by while I was gone? Did he say something to you?" Astarion clenched his fist, about ready to go and shove the wizard inside his own bag of holding.

"No.... Nothing happened..." Winnie muttered. Astarion sighed in relief before looking back at the sack he brought with him. He opened it, taking out some wine and setting it down near the bedding.

"Then why have you been crying, my sweet?" Astarion asked, a worried frown formed over his face. "Was it something I said?"

Winnie huffed and looked back at him.

"No...I'm.......I'm just overwhelmed... Everyone depends on me and now I've gone and made myself look like a fool." Winnie said, half lying and half telling the truth. "And my bleeding isn't making it any better."

Astarion then proceeded to hand the bottle of wine to her. "Perhaps this will help your mood." Winnie looked over the bottle before drinking some. The flavor was sweet with a faint hint of bitterness masked by blackberries. She set it down before noticing Astarion fiddling with the sack again.

"I may have found a rather generous merchant nearby." The pale elf added as he took out a wooden plate with a wedge of cheese and a chicken leg on it. Winnie practically drooled at the sight before shaking her head and thinking.

"Generous? Astarion, what did you do to him?" The druid crossed her arms.

"Nothing! I assure you, he is still very much alive. I didn't hurt him....Much..." Astarion said muttering out the last part with a smirk as he thought back to how he left the merchant tied to a tree after robbing him. Winnie sighed before suddenly grabbing hold of the cheese and taking a bite. Her face almost instantly relaxed into a smile as she savored the taste biting into the chicken next. Astarion watched her contently as he made himself comfortable on the bed-roll beside her. She finished the food before setting the plate to the side and relaxing.

"Thank you. I think I feel a bit better now." Winnie murmured before looking back at Astarion.

"Happy to help, although I do expect to be paid back in full for my trouble." Astarion smiled, lips forming an awkward looking grinch like grin.

"Oh....Um... Would this work?" She pulled down her shirt, exposing her neck and shoulder to him.

"A kiss will do for now." He said, moving her hand away from her neck. Winnie blushed darkly before nodding. The brunette haired female leaned in with her lips puckered before pressing them to his sweetly. Her kiss was chaste and innocent as in lingered upon his lips. He cupped her face, returning it before pulling back and pecking her forehead.

"Ahh!" Winnie grunted in pain as Astarion pulled away, hand moving down clutch her abdomen.

"Fucking hells, why does my body hate me!" She cursed.

"Probably getting back at you for not letting me inside." Astarion joked before moving closer to her. He moved a hand over her stomach. "May I? I won't do anything perverse. I promise."

Winnie bit her lip for a moment before nodding. Astarion slid his hand under her shirt and began to rub soothing gentle circles around her lower stomach. Winnie sighed in relief, before leaning against him. Astarion smiled and laid his head on her shoulder, continuing his motions.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day Gale looked around searching for one of his wizard tomes he'd forgotten he lent to Winnie just a few days prior. The wizard groaned at the prospect of possibly invoking the moody druid's wrath once more, but that was indeed a very important book! Quickly he made his way over to where he remembered Winnie had set up camp before eventually being met with an empty space.

He turned and retraced his steps before looking over to Astarion's crimson red tent with curiosity.

The wizard stepped over towards the shelter cautiously until the faint sound of soft feminine whimpers hit his ears. Inside the tent Winnie laid back against the bed-roll, pillow pulled over her bright red face as she moaned into it. All the while Astarion had his head buried between her legs, one of her thick thighs slung over his shoulder as he feasted on her.

"Uh....Winnie....D-Do you still have that tome I lent you?" The wizard stammered out, face turning bright red.

Astarion's brows knit together in annoyance before he pulled his tongue out of the druid's cunt.

"She's currently quite occupied, Gale. Now do piss off!" The vampire hissed out before returning to ravishing the human female. Winnie herself wasn't able to form any coherent sentences while the pale elf had her in his clutches, but eventually later on she returned Gale's book to him and eventually apologized for the scene she caused yesterday.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Note from TheChaoticDruid: Hope you enjoyed! I admit this is a completely self indulgent fic that was kinda a spur of the moment thing. I've seen a lot of period comfort fics that more so focus on the pain and mess than the emotional aspects of it so I wanted to put a bit of focus on that, cause honestly when it happens to me I have a tendency to be rather mean. Of course this is a little exaggerated for laughs in the beginning, but sometimes when it happens you feel like everyone is out to get ya and you wanna tear people's heads off over the littlest of things. I was a little afraid I might have made Astarion a little too soft, but given it's close to his act 2 confession I think it can maybe work.

~Druid

[theloveoffootball10]

sᴛɪᴄᴋᴡɪᴛᴜ - ᴛ ᴡ ᴇ ɴ ᴛ ʏ ᴛ ʜ ʀ ᴇ ᴇ

m a s t e r l i s t

ᴛ ᴡ ᴇ ɴ ᴛ ʏ ᴛ ʜ ʀ ᴇ ᴇ

"What the fuck if your issue?" Lando asks walking into the house. He's fuming with me and I'm fuming with him. 

"My issue? Do you seriously have to ask? Are you really that dense you have to ask me what's wrong?" Throwing my phone and bag on the kitchen island I don't even care at this moment in time if I've broken it.

"Is this seriously because Alesha rang me?"

"Yes! Because what reason would she have to be ringing you! You're not even at a track this week!" I realise I might seem like I'm overreacting but this girl has given me no reason to trust her.

"Lucía I can't control her actions! I can't help it if she's phoning me!" We're both raising our voices at each other but I can't let this go. I'm like a woman possessed.

"You don't get it! How many times did we have sex before we had each other's number!"

"So you think I'm sleeping with her? Fucking hell! Does the fact I came here to see you mean nothing? If I was seeing her, which I'm not I don't think I'd be here Lucía!" I'm almost close to backing down until Lando opens his mouth again "I might have had a one night stand with her last year but that was it. It was one time and believe it or not that was before I met you!"

"Well that's fucking fabulous isn't it! She's clearly fucking interested in you!"

"But I'm not interested in her! I could've had her all along if I wanted her! She's in it for the fame and the money!"

"Wow. I'm going to bed" I don't even want to argue about this anymore. Alesha has really got to me and I know that's what she has wanted.

Making my way to my bedroom I pull my clothes off climbing into bed wearing one of Lando's T-shirts. I hear Lando come into the bedroom behind me and sit on his side of the bed.

"I know you're not asleep Lucía. Can we at least sort this out?" I don't answer Lando, instead I let the silent tears roll down my cheeks. I'm not the kind of girl who cries over a man, the last thing I want Lando to know is that I'm crying. When I don't answer he walks into the bathroom muttering a quiet 'whatever' under his breath and I hear the shower turn on.

I listen to Lando's every move in the bathroom. I know this is my own insecurities but I don't know how I'll be able to deal with Lando being around Alesha at races when I'm not there given their history. Especially given Alesha's recent behaviour. Feeling Lando climb into bed with me I still don't move, I lay there for what feels like hours listening to Lando's sort snores in the bed beside me.

Eventually I give in and turn to look at my sleeping boyfriend, who despite us arguing is still here with me. The way Lando is sleeping I am able to turn into his arms and place a gentle kiss on his bare chest.

"I'm sorry" I whisper gently feeling myself start to cry again. I'm so worried about Alesha and what she may or may not try I'm the one pushing Lando away.

"Hi baby" Lando's voice is hoarse and I feel bad for waking him "hey, don't cry" Lando pulls me into his arms when realises I'm crying.

"I'm sorry Lando. My grandma always said never go to bed on an argument and here I am being the one to start something and I just walked away"

"Lucía don't beat yourself up over this" Lando says rubbing his hand up and down my back relaxing me "I had a shower and thought about everything. You had every right to be annoyed. I would be if someone you'd been with in the past kept phoning you for no reason. I can promise you nothing is going on with me and her. I have no idea why she would be phoning me, other than interviews at the track I haven't been in contact with her"

"I believe you. I think she's trying to come between us out of jealousy and I'm letting her"

"You don't need to let her come between us. I only have eyes for you plus it was like having sex with an ironing board. She just didn't move"

"Lando!" I can't help but laugh at Lando's description of sex with Alesha. "I can't promise I won't say anything next time I'm in the paddock. I'm your paddock princess and it is about time she realised that"

"I'm not even going to try and stop you because I know if I tell you not to, you will anyway"

"Damn right I will" getting comfy in bed I snuggle myself into Lando. I don't want to ever let this man go.

Walking into kitchen from work the next afternoon, I'm so grateful I've been able to bag myself a half day holiday. Time is ticking until Lando has to be in Azerbaijan for the next race so I want to be with him as much as possible especially after last night.

"How come you're home?" Lando asks walking out of my bathroom with a towel hanging low on his hips and water running down his chest. He looks so good I lose my train of thought "I know I'm good looking but I didn't think it was enough to make the ladies speechless"

"You're a dick. I got a half day holiday so decided I'd come and see you but I might just go back to work"

"No you won't" Lando grabs my waist from behind laughing as he pulls me into his chest soaking my clothes where he hasn't dried himself yet "my mum and dad know I'm in England and asked if we want to go an visit them this weekend. It's fine if you don't want to, we can stay here"

"We can go if you want to see them. It's only fair, you've spent time with my mum and you spend more time with my dad than I do"

"I actually do spend more time with your dad than you don't I?" It's like he's just realised that he sees my dad pretty much 4 days a week "should we go today or tomorrow?"

"How long will it take to get there?"

"Maybe three hours or thereabouts" thinking about a long drive I debate with myself what would be better, if we go tomorrow it means an early start but if we go now there's the possibility of traffic.

"Give me half an hour or so to pack a bag and we'll go tonight. I'd rather go today than get up early tomorrow" kissing Lando I run my fingers through his damp hair. I'm nervous to meet his siblings. I can deal with his parents they were lovely in Zandvoort but I don't have siblings to know what this is like.

Less than an hour later we're on our way to Lando's family home. Once again he's driving and I don't complain. I've spent most of my time serenading him terribly so far and I think he's regretting this decision.

"You're a really shit singer did you know that?" Lando asks shaking his head laughing "will I have this all the way home?"

"Yes is that a problem?"

"Not at all baby. I'm excited for you to meet my sisters I think they'll love you" I'm pleased Lando is looking forward to this because the closer we get the more nervous I get.

"I'm nervous but I'm happy to meet them for you. I hope we get on though. Did I ever tell you that you look fit driving my car?" The more I glance over at Lando the more attractive I find him. There's something sexy about a man driving with one hand on the steering wheel.

"Lucía I look fit all of the time not just when I'm driving your car" I love the cocky side to Lando, he can give me a run for my money and that's what I need in a boyfriend.

Unfortunately for me, we don't get stuck in traffic and we arrive at Lando's family home sooner than I expected. Meeting siblings feels like an ultimatum. Will he end it if they don't like me?

"Mum? Dad?" Lando shouts walking into the house after parking my car. I know Lando said his parents asked if we wanted to visit but I can't help the nagging feeling that is telling me they only meant for him to visit. I feel like I'm intruding on the limited family time they get.

"Oh my god Lan you came! Lando's mum shouts from the kitchen as she walks into the hallway to greet Lando "Lucía! I was hoping you'd be here as well!" I feel myself being pulled into a hug and I can't help return it. The warm welcome from Cisca is something I'm not used to, every boyfriend I've ever had, their parents have never liked me. I don't know if that says more about them or me.

"She was always coming with me mum" noticing the look in Lando's eye I can't help wonder if there's a double meaning to his words. No doubt I'll find out at some point.

The next 30 minutes pass in a blur as I'm introduced to Flo and Cisca, the conversation doesn't stop, his mum also joining in at times. I instantly click with the girls and feel so much more relaxed than when we first arrived. Hearing the door open I wonder who else is joining us, until I remember Cisca mentioned Oliver and Savannah were on their way with the kids.

"MILA!" Lando shouts as his niece comes running into the kitchen.

"Uncle Lala!" Mila screams back running into Lando's arms. They're as chaotic as each other. I know Lando has told me how much his nieces mean to him but seeing him with them makes me fall for him just that little bit more.

"Do you want to meet Lucía? She's my girlfriend" Lando asks holding Mila in his arms.

"I've got a boyfriend uncle Lala!"

"I hope you don't have a boyfriend! You're too young. This is Lucía, Lu this is my favourite girl Mila" Lando says with the biggest grin on his face.

"Hi Mila! You're cute just like your uncle" the next few hours fly by as everyone tells me embarrassing stories about Lando growing up, every single one of them is tag teaming him. We've had a Chinese takeaway and now I'm sat with all of the girls in the living room with a glass of wine while the boys have decided to race with Max. Mila is asleep with her head on Flo's knee and Athena is sleeping on my chest completely snuggled in.

"Lando is completely obsessed with you" Savannah says looking over at me her voice low so only I can hear "you're all he wants to talk about when we've spoken to him recently. He'll ask about the girls then talk about you nonstop"

"I've heard a few people say that. I don't know what he does to me but I've never felt this way about anyone in my life. I know it's soon but I'm falling for him so much" it's nice being able to have this conversation with someone who probably knows Lando more than most people.

"There's something about these Norris boys but don't worry about how soon it feels. It's what feels right for you two, sometimes when it's meant to be it happens in the blink of an eye"

"You're right. Maybe this was the reason why I had never met him before this year" looking down at Athena snoring softly, I look back to Savannah "he seems besotted with Mila and Athena. It made me feel a little bit broody for one of the first times in my life"

"He adores them. He's always had a fear they won't remember him because they're so young so he'll often FaceTime just to talk to the girls. We'd never let them forget him but it's how he likes to do things"

"It's cute though. I know we argue but I really think I can see a future with him" it's like having a weight lifted off my shoulders telling Savannah how I feel, I haven't really spoken to anyone about how I feel and I'm not ready to tell Lando just yet "I'm just going to see Lando" putting my glass of wine on the coffee table I pass Athena back to Savannah before I run downstairs into the games room where Lando is still streaming with Max and Oliver. I don't need to come and see him, and I certainly don't want to be the girl who drags him away from his friends but I want to see him.

"Hi baby" Lando says glancing at me barely taking his eyes off the race he's in.

"Chat we've lost him now Lucía is here" I hear Max saying over the speaker "I bet he's offline in the next 10 minutes or his mic will be on mute"

"Who said it was Lucía?" Lando asks with a slight laugh.

"If it wasn't you'd have some explaining to do mate"

"Hi Max" I say laughing "there'll be no muting of the stream either considering Oliver is in the room" standing at the back of Lando's chair i watch as he races, thankfully he doesn't have his camera on.

"Are you okay?" Lando asks muting the stream as the race ends. I can tell he's concerned but honestly he doesn't have to be. I've loved getting to know his mum, sisters and Savannah more.

"Yeah I just wanted to come and see you. What's the chances of you letting me race?" I ask expecting a point blank no, but to my surprise Lando agrees. Getting up out of his chair he lets me sit down while I do a practice lap. My attempt is shocking, leaving Lando in fits of giggles.

"Stand up. I'm going to try something" doing as Lando says I watch as he sits back in the seat making a few adjustments before pulling me onto his knee. "I'll do the pedals you just steer"

"You two are disgusting" Oliver comments from the set up on the other side of the room.

"You're just jealous bro. You're married now and your relationship is boring"

"Don't let Sav hear you saying that, she'd kill you and me" Oliver laughs "come on then Lucía show us what you've got. I want to see if the Alonso driving gene has rubbed off on you"

"Don't get your hopes up Oliver" I laugh knowing I've been shocking every time I've played any kind of racing game.

"She's about to ruin my iRacing forever" as we start the race I don't improve much if at all even with Lando controlling the pedals "chat you need to know that Lucía is the one driving not me which is why its so bad. She's a shit driver"

"Mate don't use Lucía as an excuse. You're shit" hearing Max over the speakers I know it will annoy Lando to no end. As the race ends I'm near enough in last place and I can't help laugh.

"You're never racing on my account ever again" as I feel Lando's hands on my thighs I can't help but push myself into him. His touch drives me insane and I feel my need for him growing. The slightest movement of my hips has him hardening under me. I know we're at his parent's house but I want him.

"I'm not even sorry babe I just wanted to have a go because I felt left out. I'll leave you boys to it I'm going to bed" saying a quick good night to Oliver and Max, I discreetly run my fingers over Lando's crotch as I stand up off his knee. I'm hoping he’ll get what I'm hinting at and follow me.

• • •

Sorry this has been posted so late, it should’ve been up like 3 days ago but I’ve been so busy 🫣

[veintrry]

pre-show !

idol!scaramouche x gn!reader, reader has female genitalia, teasing, biting, sucking.

exact same fic different sexual genitals: f | m

ac: ??? (comment if you know!)

It was a somewhat difficult and draining thing to be dating someone in the performing industry. You had to witness your partner in tiring states, and you both has to give up a lot to make things work, but you two still continue to try and you could proudly say you are content where you are.

There's something that boosts your ego knowing that despite the thousands of people that are watching him, only you get all of him. Though, you hadn't missed how much more clingier he had grown to be, and that was made all the more evident with his rash behaviour this evening.

Here you stood in his room at the backstage area, awaiting his arrival before he had to get on stage. This had become somewhat of a ritual for you two, to see each other before a performance; You were there for each one, from when he was but an underground name till he had gained enough traction to be known merely by the title of 'The man who speaks with his eyes'.

Still, this fame did nothing to change your relationship, not in a personal way. It did affect your time schedules and you found yourself more concerned about him due to not wanting him to overwork himself knowing how difficult this industry may be, but other than that you two had stayed relatively the same and you both were happy with that, knowing that there was nothing wrong. Although, you'd be lying if you'd say you didn't feel a tad bit jealous when you hear others shamelessly complimenting him.

The sound of the door opening with a click brushes past your ears and before you could turn around to greet whoever it was you are pulled into a tight embrace and the door had already been closed, the lock snapping into place harshly.

A whine enters your ears as his head rests on the back of your shoulder, "I need you."

It isn't a question but a statement that he is aware you both must share, and it isn't uncommon to feel this way when it comes to one another, especially with how difficult things can be for him within the industry.

He lifts his head, placing his chin onto your shoulder as he tilts it to gaze up at you. "That damn manager held me up. I was getting my makeup and hair done and then they just decided to dump more information about our coming schedules too. Who do they think they are? And to tell me so abruptly too. They're wasting my time," He complains, and you notice the way his eyes narrow, glaring at the recollection as though the entire team had practically imprisoned him and kept him from what he desired.

You think he is overreacting a bit, but you'd be lying to say you didn't feel the same, and you'd be a bigger liar to say you don't like it.

"I could be staying with you instead." He finishes, relishing in your body warmth, inhaling your scent as though he had been addicted to it, to you, and what it did to him. He wanted you, badly.

You like the sound of that, and he might've - no, he definitely picked up on that - He wasn't dense, far from it. He knew his schedule must be exhausting for you. I mean, how could you ever survive this long without him? He should be more attentive to you.

A smirk found its way onto his lips and his hands began to trail from your stomach to your waist, rubbing on your sides as he hummed into your clothing. "We haven't gotten much time to ourselves recently, have we now?" His voice had the essence of honey, attempting to fool you with its sweetness despite your knowing of the venomous intent behind it. "You know you don't have time to be doing that, especially right now Scara." You say, cutting to the chase, and he almost sends you a disapproving whine.

"You know I don't like you calling me that." He lifts his weight off your shoulder, nearing the side of your ear, mouth too close to the outer shell as he whispers in that familiar deceiving tone, "Say my name." A thumb laps circles onto your stomach, patiently awaiting your reaction, timing you.

"You have to get on soon- '' You're spun around, an arm lacing around your back, fingers wrapping around your waist firmly pulling you closer to him, too close. "Say my name."

And you see the way he stares at you, demanding you, commanding you. Hell, if you didn't say it you were sure he was going to have it come out of you with his own methods. And despite how much you didn't want to admit it, you didn't mind that, either. You didn't want him to be late, but there was a good feeling about being the reason why he's late. Plus, you were curious, just how would he make you succumb to him this time? "Make me."

That was all he needed. Those two words were like the seal to break his restraints and give his all to you, as he always should've been. It was impressive the little time it took till his lips were crashing against yours, pleading for you, you didn't even blink.

Divine is how he always felt. The softness of his lips was always so passionate and demanding, yet always with that desperation tinged in and this dawn it was stronger than usual; He yearned for you. He wished to devour all of you.

You match his pace as best as you can but he doesn't wait for you, he doesn't want to, he wants you to feel the mess that this is, he wants to make this imperfect; It's almost like he wants you to make him a mess. It would be a sight to see for someone like him to go out looking like that, the public and news outlets would have a field day. But hey, more eyes on him right? And yet he only found himself wanting yours.

A hand crawls up your spine, his fingers feeling as though they are touching your bare skin through your clothing, leaving a cold trail that makes you arch your back with a yelp. They find home in your hair, entangling into it and pulling you deeper into him, wanting you to breathe him, take him, take all of him.

But you push away for a moment, hands on his torso. You need air, and you were aware he did too. Still, he did not care. He wouldn't waste this, waste this chance to rile you up, to show you who he wants to entertain is you. Who else would tolerate all of him the way you do? "Off," His voice was hoarse, deep breaths being taken and the desperation appeared to only grow. You glance up to meet the gaze that was already long planted onto you, savouring your reactions, the puffiness of your lips and the wrong you felt for doing this but the thrill you gained from it. "Take them off." He gestures to your pants with his eyes. "Scara-" You whined as you attempted to speak, though cutting yourself off realising your mistake.

You could see the state he was in and you having called him that probably didn't help. His hands departed from your waist, his chest pressed up against you as he reached for the zipper and the way he looked at you tells you that he didn't care about the aftermath or the possibility of being caught, you might even say he enjoyed it, your response to it. And his grimacing smirk widens at the thought. "I know you want it. I bet you'd love for me to have you bent over and fucked here." Your body appeared to squirm at his words, reminded that he knew you and your body more than you did. It was only natural he'd understand your cravings. "There's no need to deny it. I know."

He leaned his face in closer to you, your noses touching and you see those pretty lashes of him cover his eyes like a veil but you feel it, you feel his hunger and you witness its coming when he licks his top lip, the zipper of your pants slowly being inched down anticipatingly. You hated how he took his time, how he knew you were still focused on the time, how unconsciously your eyes would glance over to the clock hung up above the vanity desk, and you knew that he knew how despite all of this you still wanted him to not show up– to be late, unrefined, fucked up– all because of you. He liked you like that, when you were selfish.

You latch onto the hand on your jeans and push the zipper down completely, losing your patience. "And I thought you were eager to get started?" Now you reciprocate his cocky confidence as your half-lidded eyes encounter his, daring him to see how much he could do with the time he has. And you knew him, he would do anything to prove you wrong. "Who said we haven't already?" He retorted.

The hand on your waist is slowly moved to your stomach, then dragged down to your unzipped pants that you began to hastily remove, his nails lightly touching your skin, leaving a feathery sensation and as he closed in on your most intimate spot he eyed you in silence, but he spoke to you with those emotions that whirled inside them. Bastard. His fingers make way to the bottom of your undergarment touching your wet self, rubbing his fingers around just to feel how soaked you'd gotten all by yourself.

He begins to touch you through your underwear, and the hand that was once in your hair slithered under your top, undoing your bra with ease and disposing of it with little to no care as he goes back to cupping your breast. You both are breathing heavily against one another and you're the one to latch your lips onto his again, and once you do you don't regret it, you kiss into him deeply, and you feel the moistness of his tongue press up against your bottom lip, swiping it in an ask of permission, and you wholeheartedly welcome it, opening your mouth for him as your hips jut into his touch.

His tongue was warm and naturally moist, the strong feeling of its shape and the way he roughly handled it in your mouth making it feel more prominent. He swirled his tongue around yours, pulling it deeper into his and as went on his fingers began to rub on your clit, touching you with your garments still on. He adored the insolent whines that would leave your mouth, the desperation you reciprocated in those stuttering hip movements as you attempted to get as much friction as you can, but if you wanted it so bad all you had to do was ask.

The warmth you had discovered within your mouth soon disappeared as he departed from your lips, however his pillowy lips never left your body, they merely trailed down your jaw, leaving soft kisses as he climbed down your neck. You feel his teeth grazing your skin before sinking his teeth into it like he was blood hungry. His breath hitches at the quick breath of relief you release and how you wince at the pain in pleasure. Then he kisses it, lapping the bruise with his tongue to apologise, but he only does it again and again till you were sure your neck and shoulders were covered with marks. You didn't want to think about the struggle you'd have of hiding them, but he could offer you a better solution of simply not doing so.

He continues onto his path, riding up your shirt up to your chest as he resumes in journeying down to your stomach, leaving feather-like kisses in their wake, before feeling the wet heat that's up against you again. You look down to see him licking up your navel with a smug smile, snapping you out of your thoughts. You were stupid to believe that he would simply tend to you kindly. Was this to be loving? Certainly. But kind? No, anything but that. He'd love you with everything he has, and you'll take it.

Crouching down to be at your groyne as he resumes planting sloppy kisses downwards, he finally allows his finger to latch onto your undergarments waistband, slightly teasing you as he rubs on it, making you more aware of your need for him. You let out a grumbling whine, and he sees how you furrow your brows at him but it does nothing to deliver frustration when you wore such a cute pout. Still, he was a very generous man, so he wouldn't torture you for too long. He begins to lower them till you are laid bare for him, and the only time he ever looks away from you is when he finally has a moment to relish in the divine sight of your soaked self. A pleased hum leaves him, and his eyes meet yours again and you see the satisfaction that lay within them, how he scrutinises you, teases you, with nothing but his observing violet orbs and that gleam that reflects only more to come.

You were far from the kind to feel humiliated when being seen bare by him. This wasn't the first time you two had felt each other this way, spoken to one another in such a way or let out these sounds of yours. But, the difference here was that, you certainly never had done it like this, during a time you knew you shouldn't, when you had such little time, when there was a risk of getting caught, and it made you squirm into yourself all the more, your thighs pressing against one another and thus his thumb that had rested on your inner thigh.

"Ah ah, ah." He tutted, scolding you with his tone as though you had made a measly mistake. "That's no good," The heat of his breaths meet your skin with each word he speaks, granting goosebumps amongst your skin and you are certain this was intentional. "Don't tell me you're getting all shy now, are you?" And he cocks his head to the side as he gazes to you, awaiting your answer, and you can't make eye contact, not with this view of him knelt down, so eager for you. Surely he knows.

"I see. Don't worry, I'll make sure you're completely relaxed. You don't have to worry about a thing." His words are painfully slow and the longer he speaks the softer his voice gets, the more dewy and venomously sweet it is that you wish to intake it once more.He knew how to get you going and he didn't back away from using his dirty tricks, planting a kiss atop your abdomen.

Such a pretty face he had, but he bore the personality of a snake. I suppose it would be somewhat twisted for you to admit that you found yourself to enjoy that about him, allowing yourself to be a willing prey…

[dirtyspongesoften]

Slut!

Jumin was a handsome man. He was dashingly handsome, an eligible bachelor, smart, rich. You managed to capture his heart, however the public did not agree with his view on you. But when you're with him, the sticks and stones they throw freeze mid air, because when it's just you and him, nothing else matters.

(If you couldn't tell already this is Taylor swift inspired, I think that in today's social media climate MC would definitely be criticized simply because people were jealous that she has the one thing they wanted, or people would definitely leave hate comments of some sort. But of course, her sweet, gentle, loving husband to be would smooth the creases between her brows and soothe all her worries.)

1.5k words

Jumin was one of Korea's most famous eligible bachelors, which changed when you waltzed into his life. You seduced him, black mailed him, and had been trained to do this. That was what the media said about you after the news aired the story of Jumin proposing to you at the RFA party. It had been almost a week since then, and the media still did not stop their endless commentary on the event. Of course they did not know what really happened, they thought you were there for money, for fame, for anything besides love. You tried desperately to ignore the comments, but after public outings with your fiance   everything only got worse. More people discredited your love, they scrutinized the way you held his hand, the shoes you wore, the makeup applied to your face. It was hard to cope but here, in this moment all of that felt miles away. 

The moon was full and high in the sky. It reflected off of his skin and made the pool look ethereal. You sat in Jumin's lap, his soft hands rested at your waist rubbing comforting circles there. He looked beautiful in the moonlight, his nose and dark hair made him look like a prince. You could feel him solid under your fingertips, he was real and he was yours.  You whispered and giggled amongst yourselves, sharing kisses and expensive wine while relaxing in the rooftop pool of his penthouse. 

       “My love, would you like to come to the office tomorrow to have lunch with me? I would love to have you there to give me motivation.” you brushed the strands of wet hair off his forehead and gave him a chaste kiss. 

     “I would love to babe, it's just..” you trailed off remembering the comments you heard from the women in the bathroom, ‘she's pretty average, probably looks really bad underneath the makeup, she obviously has other assets that attracted him to her if you get what I mean’ they broke out into giggles ‘yeah, she looks like a slut’ another fit of giggles. 

Jumin noticed how you went quiet and moved his hands from your waist to delicately cup your cheeks.

     “Darling, what's wrong? Please tell me, we can fix whatever it is.” You were hesitant to say anything, out of fear of getting someone in trouble, or making things worse with the media. You quickly smiled at him and hid in the crook between his neck and shoulder. 

     “Nothing, around what time would you like me to be there?” 

      “Are you sure? If someone at the office is saying something please tell me. I will take care of it.” Always so protective. 

      “It's nothing, I promise. Now what time would you like me to be there?” 

     “Around one, I'll have Mr. Kim come pick you up, are you sure though?” 

      “Yes Jumin, it's fine no one has said anything, I swear on everything I hold dear” You giggled as gave him a quick kiss and looked back while you sauntered out of the pool to get your towel. He quickly followed behind with the promise of a lovely night. 

Around midday the next day you sat in your Pjs still, Jumins side of the bed had long gotten cold and it was just you scrolling through X (formerly twitter). You sat chewing your lip as you read another ridiculous article. You knew they were never good, but some small part of you hoped that someone would write a good article, that could show just even a bit of how much love you and Jumin shared. So sometimes you would stick around and read them, this one was about your age difference. You were 20 and he was 27 although the age gap was not illegal to many it seemed strange, almost predatory on his part, and definitely fetishizing on your part, according to them. When you first fell for each other you didn't consider the seven years between your ages. It was a big talking point for the media unfortunately. Your phone dinged with a notification, snapping you out of your thoughts. Mr. Kim was downstairs waiting and you had been so caught up in the article that you completely lost track of time. You text back a quick apology and explanation before you rush to get ready. 

When you arrived to C&R there were a couple of paparazzi already gathered at the door. You felt like sobbing, how did they know about this? 

Mr. Kim quickly came by to open your door and shield you from the harsh questions from the reporters and from the dizzying lights of the cameras. 

     “Mrs. Han, what are you wearing?” 

      “Mrs. Han, how much do you hope to get out of Jumin Han after your divorce ?” Your heart broke in two pieces.

      “Mrs. Han, what do you think about E!News calling you a slut?” Your heart shattered in a million pieces. Tears pooled in your eyes as you walked through the grand glass doors. Jaehee had come down to greet you and as soon as you saw her, you threw yourself in her arms, sobbing. 

     “What happened, are you alright?” She repeatedly said your name to no avail as tears continued to flow down. She led you to the elevator where she separated herself from you and began to ask questions. 

      “Do you know who could have possibly sent the paparazzi? What did they say?” After being unsuccessful in her attempts to ask you questions she simply wrapped her arms around you. “You know Mr. Han will have this swiftly handled. I'm sorry this is happening.” The elevator suddenly dinged and you were aware of the fact that you had 5 seconds to make it look like you just hadn't been sobbing. You loved Jumin and the fact that he was so protective of you, but the last thing you needed was him fussing over this, he was already so busy. Your attempts at looking presentable failed and the door opened to reveal Jumin with a soft smile on his face, which quickly warped to worry upon seeing your disheveled state. 

      “My love, darling, what happened? Are you alright? Did someone hurt you?” He came to sweep you out of Jaehees arms and swiftly ran his hands on your body. He studied your face as you studied his worried expression.

      “Mr. Han, there was paparazzi at the front, I'm assuming it had something to do with that.” 

     “Thank you Jaehee, you're dismissed.” 

Jumin led you into his office, you saw the beautiful layout of food the chef had prepared but none of it seemed appetizing. How could they ask you that? How could they basically wish on the downfall of your marriage before it even happened?

     “They asked me how much money I wanted to get out of you after our divorce, Jumin…were not even married, how horrible is that?” your voice came out suddenly, barely above a whisper. He quickly came to wrap his arms around you. His warmth was all around you and for a second everything stopped. You could feel his hair tickle the top of your and the scent of his cologne. 

“My beautiful angel, I hate to see you cry like this, it makes my heart ache. Please do not listen to them, I will love you forever.” He brushed a stray tear off of your face. You sniffed and buried yourself into him further. “Let's go home okay? I'll take the rest of the day off.” You barely heard what he was saying as he called Jaehee to tell her that he would be taking the rest of the day off, you were too busy trying to get the paparazzis words out of your head. 

When you both arrived home Jumin took your coat and purse and guided you into the bedroom. With soft hands and gentle words of affirmation he helped you into your pjs and into bed. He crawled in behind you, he placed your head on his chest. You could feel and hear his heart beating, through all of the horrible thoughts going through your head about what had happened, his heart beat, steady and true, was the one thing that could cut through the noise. You felt his hands smoothing down your hair. You felt at peace for once this entire day, you felt warm and comforted in his arms. 

      “You will always be the light of my life, no matter what people say, no matter what  they wish for us, my love for you will never change ” You looked up to meet his eyes and saw nothing but adoration in them. 

       “I know Jumin, you're not the problem, it's what they say. It always gets to me unfortunately, but whenever I'm with you I know it's all worth it.” You warmly smiled up at him. You felt complete and whole, in this moment here. No one could take him from you, No one could take you from him. You could feel him rubbing comforting circles on your back, until you drifted off, feeling wholeheartedly content, that he was to be yours for the rest of eternity and that no matter what people said he would always be coming home to you, and you to him.

[rickybaby]

Laila I hard agree with your tags RE: Italiano leaving. I’ve seen people joke that Danny must have fucked his girlfriend or something but I don’t think it’s anything personal (in that way)

If I had to guess I’d say it was something big, maybe business/money related. I kind of hoped Daniel just realized what a shit trainer Michael was (I can rant on his bs practices all day, but he pushes some unsustainable and sometimes outright dangerous ideas like extensive fasting, etc. etc. which have always rubbed me the wrong way). BUT I think in reality Daniel hasn’t really acknowledged/processed how NOT OKAY that whole McLaren stint was for him. He still talks to Zak, all the McLaren mechanics, friendly with Lando and Oscar, so if it was just “Michael let him down and wasn’t putting his best interests first in McLaren” I think Danny would have just let it go.

One thing he’s not stupid about though, is his money/business (and also, what a lot of people don’t acknowledge, his privacy). We don’t really hear a lot about Danny post-season. So I feel maybe the fall out had to do with Italiano going on podcast after podcast talking about Daniel and then also (presumably) raking in money for it. Again, all allegedly completely-just-going-from-my-own-vibes, Michael Italiano do not sue me

I do think there was a catalyst that led to their break-up sometime after the last race last year, because if I remember correctly, Jack (Doohan) had mentioned that Michael would be training him for F2 while still working with Daniel during his year off. But then, this never happened and MI ended up going to AT. All I'm saying is, whether something happened or someone sat Daniel down and talked to him about it, Daniel on his own would never have realised how harmful whatever MI preached was. And i think whatever it was, really hit Daniel hard because every time he's talked about coming back this year, whether it's the lone wolf comment or other things, he's constantly talked about how he's approaching training differently and how he's realised prioritising his recovery and rest is important.

Regarding your comment about whether Michael wasn't putting Daniel's interests first at Mclaren, I think a lot of people got the same impression, especially if you go by his comments on his Pitstop appearance this year. The way he framed it kind of implied that he was annoyed at Daniel's decision to take a year off and there was the implication that this derailed his own career and aspirations, which fair enough.

But coming to whether it could have been money/business-related, I feel like this is more like it. You do get the impression he was more in it for the money and the fame. Forget the part about dming girls and the cheating allegations, but the side-hustle part of it?? With the F1 season getting more and more hectic and trainers like Brad and Angela leaving because they can't keep up with the strain and time demand of the new calendar, how can you have the time to dedicate to other private clients? To me, it just means you're not really giving your 100% to the driver you are meant to support. Then, there was the mask debacle thing in 2020, his whole 'merch' collection and the way he continued to make money off his posts of Yuki this year.

And then the privacy thing - I know just because Daniel looks like such an open guy that people don't realise how private he is. Even during the whole mclaren debacle, not one person from his side ran their mouth in the press when you constantly have the family or friends of other drivers making snide comments or liking posts they shouldn't. And then, there's mr. Italiano making appearances in dodgy podcasts and obviously whatever he says, people are bound to take it as him meaning it about daniel because that's who they associate him with. And then the whole leaking of his private medical info, coming after the one and sole sighted interaction of theirs must have come as such a betrayal to Daniel

[mitsukiwa]

Baby, love me cause I'm playing on the radio.

A/N: FYI, I posted this story in Wattpad, therefor I don't want to hear I'm copying from someone or they're copying from me. I can assure you I'm the same person. With that being said enjoy (Billy willy has my heart) Pt 2I Pt 3I My wattpad user is 6arelyhuman_ if u want the outfits visuals u should read it there.

WARNING!!! There will include: angst, fluff, smut, love triangle (it's a bill ff so don't worry)

Summary: You love bill and there's no doubt in your heart, unbeknownst to you he feels the same way. You both have to overcome challenging events that leads the both of you to grow apart, what happens when his twin brother feels for you? Will you be able to crush his heart? What will you do to prevent hurting them both?

''If we could go back in time, what timeline would you go back to?'' I ask after a long moment of silence.

A stray thought that had crossed my mind, he hums in thought. Seemingly really thinking about it. He shifts his position on the grass. I also reposition myself differently, rolling over to my side to look at his side profile. He glances at me, then back at the sky.

''I would go back to before we got well known.'' I open my mouth to say something, but before I can he interrupts me.

'' Don't get me wrong, I'm happy with my life and how it turned out, It's everything I wanted and more.'' He lets out a sigh through his nose.

''Like if I actually would have gone to college, and I don't know? Lived life as an average man''

You nodded slowly. You knew where he was coming from because you had also thought of the same thing before.

''Tom wouldn't be a cocky womanizer,'' I say, electing a laugh from Bill beside me.

''Yeah, I think it's gotten to his head.'' ''You think?'' I say sarcastically. We both look at each other for a moment and burst into laughter.

Our laughter dies down, and we're left in comfortable silence. I glance up at the night sky, gazing at the stars that twinkle. Some were bigger than others, some even looked about the size of a speck of dust.

A sudden memory came to mind when we were little, the four boys and I would climb onto the roof of the twins' house and watch the night sky. We'd scream out 'Look a shooting star' as a bright star shot through the dark abyss. Simone would even prepare snacks for us to eat while we were up there.

The boys and I would make a wish, Tom always blurted out his, ''I want to date a hot model!''

I would playfully punch his shoulder as we all laughed at him. My wish was to always have the five of us stick together, no matter what.

''Remember Ria?'' Bill said, bringing back me from my thoughts. I roll my eyes at the name.

Bill dated her for a year. She was such a slut, she slept with Tom, knowing they were brothers. Bill was upset with his brother's poor decision. They didn't talk for months. They finally got over their differences so Bill forgave Tom.

''Yea,'' I say bitterly.

''Sometimes I wonder if she would have still dated me if I wasn't famous.'' He said honestly.

''probably not'' I say. In my opinion, she was only with Bill because he was a successful band leader.

And just wanted him for his fame, I wouldn't be surprised if she never loved him.

''I thought so too.'' He saids lowly.

It honestly breaks my heart. How sad and vulnerable he sounded saying this.

I reach for his hand interlocking my fingers with his. He rubs his thumb in a circular motion on my hand.

''she missed out on a whole lot'' I say causing him to smile.

''Really?'' he asks.

''Im sure'' I respond.

This seemed to make him feel better.

''You're a great friend'' He said, flashing me the brightest smile. I wince at the word 'friend', before quickly masking it with a smile of my own.

''I try to be'' I manage to say.

''Have you given Tom an answer''

" Have you given tom an answer?" God, why did he have to ruin such a great moment. I let out a sigh, " No, i've been avoiding him". Now saying those words out loud made me feel shitty. Bill frowned at me, clearly disappointed in my actions. " that's not how you should handle it" He said in a disapproving tone, shaking his head at me. " I know, I know I just" , My hands fly up to my face. I drag them down my face, leaving them to cover over my mouth. " I just don't want to hurt him with my answer" My words sounded muffled, though bill still managed to hear my words. "I'm pretty sure it hurts him more that you're ignoring him" He saids, stating the obvious. "I know and i feel like an ass hole" i groan out. "well, do you?" He asks, It takes me moment to process his question. "Do i what?" " Like him" He states simply, as if it was the most simplistic thing in the world. "I" The words caught in my throat. He pokes my cheek with his index finger. "Is that a blush i see?" He teases.

My heart breaks, he thought i liked tom, it wasn't like that at all, I only saw him as one of my best friends. Don't get me wrong i love him, but it was different than what i felt for bill.

I sit up, rubbing my hands on the fabric of my jeans, something i did when i was nervous, bill sat up also. "I don't know Bill" I say below a whisper. He frowns at me. " what is it, you can tell me" He throws an arm around my shoulder, bringing me close to his side. He places his chin on top of my head. I breath in his scent, breathing in what smelt like cologne and a hint of cigarettes.He was smoking again. I frown at the discovery. He had promised he would quit that habit, he only did so when he was stressed.

"The only right way to handle this situation is to tell the truth." I deflate, of course he was right, but i was scared, this could potentially ruin my friendship with both of them. And I honestly don't think i could ever handle something like that. They both mean so much to me. "come on" He nudged me in his arms.

HIS ARMS I felt so safe in his arms, his embrace was warm, the soothing strokes of his hand running through the locks of my hair could be enough to lull me to sleep.

I let out a puff of air, forcing myself to muster up some courage. "I'm still trying to figure out things out" It wasn't entirely the truth but somewhat close. I needed to figure out confessing my feelings to bill, or if i wanted to have tom hate me by doing so. It was the same outcome, one i so badly wanted to avoid. He hums in understanding.

"Got it, just don't avoid him, instead tell him those exact same words"

God, bill always knew what to say or do to make me feel better. I nod. I let out a quick 'ok'

"alright, i think we should get going, It's far too dark to be laying here in the park" He looks around. I laugh at him, he gives a frown in response.

"yeah, we may even get mugged." His eyes widened. He was so paranoid. I pat his shoulder, "Relax, the only thing they'll be getting is a card, and i sure as hell am not giving them my pin" He laughs at my humor. As we walk to his car in the parks parking lot he tells me about a few demos he's unsure of releasing. The ride to his apartment complex in LA was spent blasting music at full volume.

© Mitsukiwa 2023-Do not copy,post or translate my work anywhere.

[yuncheoligans]

Chapter 14: Better

“Mingi you can’t be here.” I said hiding behind the door.

“Like hell I can’t!” he pushed the door open. 

“Min please you’ll get in trouble.”

“I don’t care.” he sat on the couch. “Take it back and I’ll go.”

“Mingi I already told you I’m not taking it back.”

“Then I guess I’m staying until you change your mind.”

“Mingi.” my lip trembled. “Please just go. You can’t be here.”

“I can be wherever I damn well choose to be with whoever the fuck I want!” he moreso shouted at the tv than me.

“Mingi” my voice cracked, tears falling. “Please.” I tugged at the end of the hoodie I was wearing…his hoodie I was wearing.

I didn’t want him to go, I wanted him to stay right there. I wanted both of them to stay there I wanted to crawl into that couch next to them and disappear. I wanted to take it all back, but they were better without me. No hate, no threats, no scandals.

“Tell me you didn’t mean it and I’ll go….y/n….Tell me you don’t love Yunho and I’ll go…tell me none of it was real, you were using us for fame and I’ll go. Tell me you don’t love me and I’ll go. ” he stood in front of me. I shook my head no. No….I couldn’t….I couldn’t tell him that. “I’m not going anywhere.” he pulled me into him gently and lifted up my face to look at him, I couldn’t meet his gaze. “You’re crazy you know.” he smiled softly.

“What did you mean no?” I hiccuped.

“I meant no, you can’t just break up with me that easily.” my eyes flicked to his face briefly. “Remember we said we’d deal with it together? Let’s handle it together.”

“I’m too scared Min.”

“That’s why we’re both here. Yunho and I. You don’t have to worry about stuff alone. You weren’t ever alone.”

“Please don’t…….”

“If you think I’m not scared of this every damn day of my life you’re wrong. I’m scared of all of this. I don’t run from it because no matter what my best friends are at my side. Y/n, my love, please…don’t run away from this. If you think Yunho doesn’t feel the same either you’re wrong…..stay here baby….you’re safe here.” he squeezed me tighter and started humming softly. 

It was that stupid voicemail all over again. I started crying against his chest, his shirt getting drenched no way around it. 

“Hey maybe we just moved a little too fast okay?” Yunho spoke up popping in finally. “Sorry I was waiting for the right time to come in with food. I said I was bringing dinner.” I turned around and hiccuped or coughed…still unsure which one kind of in between the two. “It’s okay, let’s pump the brakes a little and just…take our time.” he smiled softly.

Always the voice of reason.

“Please don’t go.” I whispered as he handed me the bag of fried chicken and beers.

“I’m just clearing a space at the table.” he smiled and patted my head. “I’m not going anywhere Tiny.”

“Told you so.” Mingi nudged me gently.

“Min?” Yunho held up my broken camera. “Did you?”

“They did that.” I said quietly.

“The fans?!” Mingi grew hot with anger.

“No the airline….they threw my bag on and it got smashed…I don’t need it anyways.” I sighed.

“You’re a photographer you need a camera.” Yunho deadpanned at me and looked at Mingi.

“Probably not for much longer. It’s fine…Wooyoung was right I don't….I don’t need the job and I can figure something else out.” I shrugged. “I’m okay not having the job.”

“It’s your dream.” they both looked at me.

“I have other dreams too.” I played with the hoodie. “I’m just saying you don’t have to worry…about that.”

We sat down to eat finally, my face puffy from tears. The vibe was tense but slowly calmed as we started eating. I really was happy they were here….I was happy they fought me so hard. I guess sometimes they are right. Yeah…. I needed a hard slap to the head.

“Ow!” I looked at Mingi.

“You said I could slap you when you’re being ridiculous.” he smiled.

“I said that in high school.”

“Still counts. Because you said “as long as we’re together.” he hit me again.

“You bastard.” I rubbed the back of my head. “You’re so getting it later.”

“Promise?” he winked.

“You’re gross.” I stole the piece he was reaching for to eat it.

“Hey! Yunho!!!” he pointed at me stealing the chicken.

“Just take a different piece.” he shrugged his own mouth full.

“Whoa whoa this is a partnership, you can’t just take sides like that.”

“Just did, eat, there’s too much chicken here.” he gestured towards the chicken.

Okay….maybe I was stupid for breaking up with them for 4 days….

“You know you talk a lot of shit for someone who’s single.” Yunho winked at me while looking at Mingi.

“Oh I’m single? Guess who else is.” he pointed at Yunho. “You betray me all the time anyways. Just like those letters! Every time!”

Oh god….losers….my losers.

~Prev/

tags: @yunbug, @gxlden-bxbyy, @byuntrash101 <3 <3 <3

[roo-bastmoon]

Hi I read your last post.

And I just want to give my 2 cents.

1. Why Tae is always doing it ?. I mean I get many ot7s here comparing it with hobi posting with Jimin. BUT the vibes they gives off is totally opposite. Hobi is just innocently posting his whatever updates with ALL members. You can clearly see an untainted affection to ALL members equally. But with Tae anyone with eyes can see and understand it's NOT like that. There was NO need for him to post that fake marker tattoo, there was NO need for him to come online twice or thrice just to say he was talking to JK or gaming with him, as if Jinkook was not gaming often. Fact that he doesn't mention anyone but JK, the main purpose of his visits is to inform Tkk news is so wierd. It very much rubs me in a wrong way.

2. Like you said, idk why he feels his fame will go away if he's not keeping on feeding tkkrs. JM was inactive for MONTHS. He barely posted during last 6-7 months, while he was working his ass off which now he's getting paid. But the rare times Jimin comes home it's to wish fans, say he's working, to say he miss and loves us. Even members share the same thing abt him - Jimin is working hard to prepare something huge. JK is inactive now for almost 2 months. So if 2 members of maknae line doesn't need any ship or glamor to keep their fans close why tae thinks he needs to ? Given he's the one with most followers among maknaes ? Is he not confident in his fans. Or does he know the mass breed following he has, who will disappear if he won't feed them tkk ? It's something we all knew but all of this confirmed it again, Jimin is VERY CLASSY.

3. Now boys know all the after effects of their actions. There was a reason why Tae came to weverse to clear it when he accidentally followed Jennie. So he knows it is JM's name will be dragged for everything tkk does. One can say he's not responsible for tkkrs. But one thing is spending time with your bandmate but he should also consider about his another bandmate who is bruttaly attacked each time he decides to feed them. If your action is causing major damages to people you claim to love everyone will be cautious about posting what is going behind the scenes online. Now last time he came live, I knew it was to say something tkk. And I wasn't wrong. EVERYONE can see the pattern, unnecessary pattern, but won't admit.

4. Now this is the most important. JK. If JK is with tae everytime he gives updates, then there's nothing, we as Jikookers can complain about. We may think what tae is doing is not nice BUT it's JK who's still choosing to do everything he shared with tae. Tae is NOT lying about these things. All of this indeed happened (except tattoo thing). So which is worse. Spending all time with one person or the said person saying it online ? In this sense, tae is not doing anything wrong, even if he has a hidden agenda. It was JK who spend days and hours gaming with tae, it is JK who goes bowling with his friends, it's JK who posted a cropped pic of their private trip, it's JK who went to tae before he went to Qatar or even the day JM was returning home from Paris. It was JK who didn't supported JM's work online, It was JK who's going shopping with tae. if JK likes to do everything with him, except coming online to say a Hi to his own fans or atleast give 2 fucks about Jimin's existence, tae is simply making it online. Not pulling lies out of his ass.

5. Even if this much happened which WE think is not nice from tae's side, Jimin and JK is not bothered. Jimin doesn't give 2 fucks about tkk, conspiracy theories or tkkrs. He doesn't care if JK is spending so much time with tae, not being there when he comes home, not supporting him on sm, he doesn't care of their cult fans are dragging his name, he doesn't care if these all stirs more conspiracy theories. He is doing his thing, he's making his album, he is coming online to wish fans, he is getting his deals, he seems so happy in latest contents, him and hobi share even deeper bond, he's GLOWING. Which is the MOST IMPORTANT THING FOR ME. JK doesn't give 2 fucks if Tae is saying it all online even in middle of his sm break, he doesn't care if it's stirring more tkk theories and rumors. It's obvious his view abt Fandom and how he approaches it changed. Now what does that tell us ? Either Jikook doesn't care about these things or it's just us reading all of this, I mean ALL OF THIS, wrongly - including Jikook.

So, I'll be honest, this ask coming from a totally blank account looks like bait. But in the interest of giving everyone the benefit of the doubt, I'll entertain you once.

Disclaimer 1: I'm a 1-year-old ARMY still making my way through content, so please take my opinion with a grain of salt.

Disclaimer 2: Your thoughts and feelings are valid--but none of us have the right to assume we know how any BTS member thinks, feels, acts off camera, or intends things to be. So understand your thoughts are your thoughts, not necessarily reality, and that we don't have a right to every sliver of these guys' lives.

First and Second Question: Why does Tae constantly namedrop JK? In my opinion, I think Tae's parents were forced by circumstances to leave him with his grandparents, and ever since then, he became an idol and an actor (and a good one) because he's afraid of being invisible. He doesn't want to be abandoned, so he will try on many different faces and personas. He will rarely share the "real" Kim Taehyung unless you're very close to him. He told us as much in an interview. I think Tae knows that he will always have a base among fans who like Taekook, and so he showcases Taekook. I notice a pattern to it, in the past year or so, though. Whenever JK or Jimin are trending or in the news (or if dating scandals are making the rounds), Tae comes online to mention only Jungkook and imply how close he is to Jungkook. And you know what? He IS close to Jungkook. Always has been. They DO hang out. I've never been in any doubt of it. Those two have been playing online and arcade games and doing sports and listening to music since they were fetus teenagers just starting out and they still are. I love that for them. I mean that sincerely. It's normal and healthy. And considering Tae sometimes hangs out with not-so-nice rich and famous folks, I'd much rather he chill with his members. Just my opinion, don't come for me. It does make me sad that Tae rarely mentions when he has hung out with Hobi, or Jin--yet they have both mentioned Tae has come over and hung with them, or had drinks and dinner with the whole group. I think this goes back to only a select few people seeing the "real" Taehyung, whereas V will share things online that he thinks fans want to see. Because he needs to be seen.

Third Question: Impact. Listen, all BTS members have Master's degrees in things like communications, entertainment, media, advertising, etc. They've been in the business for a decade. They are well aware of their impact, and likely follow it to varying degrees by using private social media accounts. I wish they each had training on how to respond to backlash or prevent backlash online, but it is what it is. So I think it's a safe bet to say they know when members get flack. But the extent of it? I honestly don't know. I'm not sure any of them spend too much time on English Twitter, gauging what rando theories nutters come up with. Creating online buzz is part of their business. Tae really seems to enjoy it. Jimin really does not. And we all saw a sharp direction change in JK, who used to come to us for Q&A sessions all the time, and now only updates for work. A decision he made round about the time the press started dragging Jimin for not getting his bills in the mail. At some point, for your own sanity, you have to stop taking responsibility for how others will twist things.

Fourth Statement: With the exception of the momentous occasion of headlining the World Cup, Jimin and Jungkook have stopped commenting on each other's social media, nor do they hype each other's projects. To me, this is so, SO much louder than if they just gave canned, lukewarm thumbs ups to things. You can take it to mean they don't care about each other's work, but, that would be inconsistent with 9 years of what they've said and shown us. The fact that Jungkook and Jimin are the ONLY two members not ever publicly hyping each other is... kind of putting a giant LOOK HERE sticker on their relationship, in my opinion. So if Jikook aren't showing us much evidence of off-stage Jikookery, then I look to the people around them.

The members, who all immediately look to Jungkook when Jimn struggles to open a food packet. Jin and Joon, laughing at Jikook acting out their own personal K-drama chase scene over gluten ramen. Yoongi and Hobi, rushing to explain why they heard Jimin's songs first to an upset JK. Joon, who teases JK specifically that Hobi is Jimin's #1. Hobi, who asks JK to do ace couples yoga with Jimin. Hobi, who explains JK is in charge of the music when Jimin is bumming around in his underwear at home. Hobi, who posted videos of Jikook playing games in the DC arcade. Yoongi, who automatically compares JK's organic approach to Jimin's hardworking style in the studio.

And never mind the members. Furniture stores that sell beds follow just them. Jewelry makers that specialize in couples pieces follow just them. Their tattoo artist has their initials forever inked on his arm. JK's brother kept up fanart of Jimin, Jungkook, and Bam online. Jimin's dad posted photos of JK's dog on his birthday. JK's mom made seaweed soup on Jimin's birthday.

I have never once seen anyone in the inner circle treat Taehyung and Jungkook like a unit this way. (Edit: I guess you could count that Wooga dudes follow JK on insta too, but, I just don't see people constantly linking Kim Taehyung and Jeon Jungkook together off stage. The only one doing that is Tae.)

Everywhere you look, the people around Jikook treat them like a couple. BECAUSE THEY SO OBVIOUSLY ARE ONE.

FIFTH POINT: While I certainly would not be comfy if my best friend led millions of fans to believe he were in a romantic relationship with my boyfriend, I am not the maknae. I didn't grow up with shipping as an expected part of my job performance, and I didn't trauma bond with all of my members in my formative years. I think Jimin (and probably JK, based on the fact he continues to hang with Tae) find Tae's behavior to be zero threat because... it's truly of zero threat in real life.

Personally? I think Tae is straight (or at least bi) and has had straight relationships and really wants to marry a woman and have children some day--not because it's expected of him, but because that would bring him joy. I do not think he actually wants Jungkook romantically. (You MIGHT make a case to me that he had a crush on Jimin, maybe. But those guys are firmly and solidly in the friends-for-life category, per Jimin's clear feelings for JK.) This is just the vibe I get. I have no way of knowing. But even though the cult gets whipped up and they go online and spout ABSOLUTE VICIOUS NONSENSE, as long as Jikook are unbothered, I gotta stay unbothered too. Because I trust Jikook to know what's best for them.

Instead, I spend my time and energy supporting Jikook and BTS as a whole. I focus on streaming, voting, buying, and hash-tagging my heart out, in between watching episodes with my friends, because I've learned to put my energy toward the things I want. And I chalk Tae's behavior up to insecurity and growing pains. It sucks but I think it's part of his journey.

Because whatever Tae claims or implies, Jungkook has been super clear with us:

So that's all I'm gonna say on this topic. Thanks for writing in. I wish you a positive and joyful fandom experience, my dear lurking friend!

Yours,

Roo

[trillscienceofficer]

“Distant Shores” (Voyager short story collection, 2005) review: meh

I'd hoped this collection would be better, frankly; luckily the stories that involve B'Elanna (and there were quite a few of them, to my surprise) are mostly okay. Kes also appears prominently in at least two stories but Harry didn't really get one where he's the protagonist, and I'm surprised none involved Naomi or the Borg kids. Three stories seemed very concerned with the surviving Equinox crew and at least two seemed to want to vindicate them somehow?? I don't know, weird choices. But regardless, the problem wasn't so much in the ideas but in the execution, which was often atrocious.

story-by-story breakdown under the cut

“Da capo al fine” by Heather Jarman - this is the 'frame' story, you get to read the first half at the beginning and the second half at the end, but this story doesn't work so well for this purpose as the one on “The Lives of Dax” did for that collection. The plot is about Admiral Janeway and her last moments with the Borg Queen in “Endgame” but, idk. I think the author wanted to write a reckoning with all of Janeway's arch-nemeses but the story fails to have any stakes.

“Command Code” by Robert Greenberg - Tuvok and Chakotay get snippy on the bridge once Chakotay is left in command very soon after “Caretaker”. The concept is intriguing! Unfortunately the author's style is as dull as watching paint dry.

“Winds of Change” by Kim Sheard - this one was really fun! After being possessed by Tieran, Kes is struggling with her anger and reactivity so she goes to B'Elanna for help, and they try some of B'Elanna's sports holoprograms. This does not go well! Everything seems lost until B'Elanna offers a different approach to holoprograms, and it turns out they can work well together. This was just a really nice take on a dynamic that was really underexplored in the show (the author makes a point to say so as explicitly as she can), and it's honestly one of the best stories in the bunch.

“Talent Night” by Jeffrey Lang - my man Jeffrey (of “String Theory - Cohesion” fame) contributes to the collection with a hilarious story concept and great characterization for all involved, mostly B'Elanna, Tom and Harry, who are in charge of organizing said talent night. I can almost forgive the fact that it just an elaborate setup to get B'Elanna and Tom together by making B'Elanna needlessly jealous. Almost.

“Letting Go” by Keith R. A. DeCandido - this story is about the ones 'left behind' by Voyager, the families and loved one of the crew back in the AQ. I think I would've liked this way more if the author had chosen to follow anyone else other than Janeway's fiancé Mark. I liked how grounded the story is in the events of DS9 and First Contact and the range of reactions that all these people have to Voyager's disappearance, but I found myself wondering more about Greskrendtregk and T'Pel than Mark. I also found it hilarious that the story ends with Mark having married someone else and having to write to Janeway, who he's just learned is still alive, about it. I have to say though that it was a nice touch to have a lot of the people involved be the families of the crewmen who died in “Caretaker”—they obviously don't know what happened but the reader does, so their presence lends a lot of emotional gravity to the narrative.

“Closure” by James Swallow - Seven and Neelix get trapped in a cave that used to be inhabited by aliens and Neelix walks off to find a way out when—Kes shows up. Is it a vision, induced by the Ocampa artifacts in the cave? Is it actually Kes who's come back to say goodbye? It doesn't make much difference to Neelix, who is very glad to see her again. I think I would've appreciated this story more if it hadn't turned Neelix into too much of a lovesick fool; I don't like the idea that he actually never got over Kes with this kind of intense sentimentality. The story was enjoyable but something about it rubbed me the wrong way.

“The Secret Heart of Zolazus” by Robert T. Jeschonek - this one is terrible. Seven crash-lands on a planet and is saved by an outcast who pretty much gives her life for Seven and it's supposed to be ~inspirational~ or something but it's written in a way that... I don't know, reads exactly like one of those corny christian moral stories? I swear it's one of the most artless, embarrassing things I've read this year. The one thing it has going on is that Seven gets to kneel beside this dying alien girl who's taken a hit for her and so you can read some subtext in there, but the horrifying ableism is truly not worth the ticket!

“Isabo's Shirt” by Kirsten Beyer - the horrors aren't over though because this story is worse!! It's unabashedly J/C but oh boy both Chakotay and Janeway are so HORRIBLY out of character I couldn't cope. How did this even get published? Is this shipping brain at its worst?? Plus it's embarrassingly racist. I was never particularly interested in this ship but if THIS is in any way representative I am for sure steering well clear.

“Brief Candle” by Christopher L. Bennet - note: if you can't understand the distinction between romance and workplace sexual harassment you should probably not be writing romance! This is particularly galling because this is the 'Marika Wilkarah lives on Voyager for a few weeks' story which is something I wanted to see explored for a long time, and like... Marika HAS some interiority and convictions in this story but 1. we never see her really interact with other Bajorans if not in hindsight (why??) 2. her remaining resentment for Seven is barely mentioned and 3. she basically wants to be close to someone before dying and? essentially harasses Harry into having a relationship with her?? what???? If this were a fic it should get a 'dead dove do not eat' label. That was so, so awful and such a disappointment for the interesting concept this story promised to be. As I said in a previous post, the one thing this story has got going on is that Marika sides with B'Elanna during the events of “Barge of the Dead”, which I think it's a great take! But not enough to make me forget how bad the rest is.

“Eighteen Minutes” by Terry Osborne - the story of the time the Doctor spent on the planet from “Blink of an Eye” before he got beamed back to Voyager. I'm always extremely ambivalent about Doctor episodes/stories and this one is no exception. On one hand, the conflict he faces between his programmed-in hippocratic oath and the prime directive is believable, but on the other it ends up being another one of those weird power fantasies in which the Doctor gets the boundless gratitude and undying affection of the people around him because... he's done his job as a medical practitioner? It feels in character but I don't have to like it!

“Or The Tiger” by Geoffrey Thorne - LOVELY B'Elanna characterization in this one right until the ending, which I hated. Authors always tend to exaggerate B'Elanna's propensity for violence when in reality the show consistently shows her being very restrained and extremely remorseful whenever she snaps (and she only snaps because people tell her constantly that she's unable to control herself!) It's one of those stories where the point is 'aw the Equinox crew is trying very hard to make amends and the Voyager people are being mean to them' which... baffles me as a setup? It was interesting to see B'Elanna believably get into a rabbit hole when confronted with new technology that could help Voyager! But I'm not sure she wouldn't have snapped out of it as soon as it was pointed out to her that she might've been hurting living beings with her actions. We've seen B'Elanna struggle with this kind of moral quandaries before (“Prototype” and “Dreadnought” come to mind), so that the conflict dragged out for as long as it did here (and that she beat someone up for it!) feels deeply out of character to me.

“Bottomless” by Ilsa J. Bick - another one of 'the Equinox crew deserved a second chance!' stories, this time with crewman Marla Gilmore. I loved the technological conundrum (what do you do if your submersible is stuck on the bottom of the sea??) and Marla's lingering guilt and resentment felt believable and genuine. Shame that she expresses this mostly by being mean to B'Elanna (thought it happens mostly in her head), and you get the feeling she's just sharing the author's POV, since she has Tom saying some terrible garbage too... there's really nothing quite as diabolic as misogyny (and misogyny that's racially coded) coming from women authors! Ultimately Marla sacrifices herself to save Janeway and Chakotay and in so doing she expiates all of her Equinox sins, which would be okay (I guess) if it wasn't the exact same plot of “Brief Candle”, for some reason.