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going-dead · 2 years ago

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Horses not Unicorns

Prompt by @eyesofcrows : in some hospitals, CPR is done to a patient despite them being declared dead on arrival. This is a courtesy to the family. The doctor doesn't expect the scream when they lay down the defibrillator paddles on the boy's chest.

Dr. Cecelia Martinez had worked as an ED doctor for longer than some of the nurses under her had even been alive. She saw more gruesome scenes in one week than most people would in their entire lives if they were lucky. She would even say she’d seen it all if she wanted to be stupid and jinx herself.

She took one of the coffees out of the cup carrier in her hands and placed it in front of Lily, the nurse on shift with her. “Your cream with a dash of coffee.”

“Thanks Martinez. And stop ragging on me about how much cream I put in my coffee, it tastes good.” Lily nodded her head not taking her eyes off of the computer screen in front of her. She was finishing up the chart notes for the last patient who’d came in and reviewing the work of their med student..

“Anything for you. Lord knows I wouldn’t last a week without you here. But never, it’s an affront to caffeine. I didn’t consume gallons of the stuff back in school, or on these night shifts just for you blaspheming it like you do. Look at it, it’s lighter than a person dying of blood loss.” Dr. Martinez took the other cup out of the holder and handed it to the medical student shadowing her for the next few weeks, Brian.

Or well he was supposed to. Not many of the students just starting their rotations make it long in the emergency department, especially if it was one of their first rotations, even less come back to work there when they graduate. The kid only started the night before so she hadn’t had much of a time to get a grasp on what he was made of.

“Thank you Dr. Martinez.” Brian gave her a small smile as she took a seat. “Can I ask a question?”

“That’s why you’re here isn’t it? And drop the title stuff, if you won’t call me Cecelia you can at least call me Martinez.” She looked Brian up and down, he was either restless or nervous, or perhaps both , with how he tapped his finger and his leg hadn’t stopped moving up and down.

“Uh okay. It’s just I was wondering, we’ve hardly seen any patients come in. Is it always this slow?” Brian asked.

“God damn it Brian!” Lily shouted, startling the poor med student.

“What? Did I do something wrong when charting?” His eyes widened.

Dr. Martinez wouldn’t deny it had been…less than busy. It was already four in the morning and the most interesting thing they had seen that night was someone coming in for back pain because they pulled a muscle. A quick lidocaine patch and he was on his way. Of course now that Brian had challenged fate, there was very little chance the night would continue on with such ease. “You spoke words never to be spoken in a hospital setting. The forbidden ‘s’ word.”

Brian rolled his eyes. “I didn’t think medical professionals would be so superstitious.”

“Not superstition if it’s true.” Lily huffed, she had already downed her coffee in preparation. Dr. Martinez quickly followed suit.

Almost on cue one of the triage nurses burst through the doors as the intercom spoke out overhead. “Code blue, pediatric male, ED waiting room.”

Dr. Martinez swore jumping up from her seat. “Lily get the crash room prepared and get peds down here. Brian with me.” She followed the triage nurse into the waiting room not giving the student time to catch up with her.

Who the patient was, was obvious. Even if there wasn’t a nurse actively transferring him into a gurney. He was the only person under the age of thirty in the waiting room.

Dr. Martinez turned to the man hovering near the child. “You dad?”

The man shook his head. “Teacher, William Lancer, we’re on a school trip one of the students noticed he wasn’t breathing in his sleep, and well-can you help him.”

“We’ll do the best we can. Do you know of any health conditions, allergies, medications?” She questioned.

William Lancer shook his head. “No. Danny’s perfectly healthy for a kid his age, despite being on the smaller side.”

He was correct about him being on the smaller side of his age group, looking at him, she would’ve said he was fifteen at most, not seventeen. Dr. Martinez followed the nurses to the crash room. They had already started to put the leads of the AED onto the patient when she walked in.

The likelihood of the kid making it was slim to none. Even if he did the effect of his brain not having oxygen for so long. She was aware of that. If he hadn’t been breathing since he was found and then the whole trip to the hospital…Well it was her job to at least try.

Brian was just standing and staring at the body infront of them as Dr. Martinez started an IV line letting the nurses start to bag the patient and the others finished up with the AED preparations. “Brian get moving or get out of the way.”

“He’s just a kid.” He stared.

“No pulse, Starting compressions!” A nurse called out.

Brian flinched at the sound of ribs breaking under the strain of chest compressions. “Someone get the student out of here.” She yelled.

That snapped him out of his stupor. “No I can do this, what do you want me to do?”

“Take over the bagging.” She instructed, it was probably one of the simpler tasks she could give him, as long as he didn’t pop the patients' lung.

She heard the AED speak up, still no pulse, still no, shockable rhythm. “Administering epinephrine.”

They continued like that for five more minutes, staff switching out doing compressions or bagging. Passing medications. But they all knew the chances.

Or they thought they did.

“We got a new reading!” Lily shouted.

Dr. Martinez looked over at the EKG reading. “He’s in V-fib, get the AED ready to shock.”

The staff waited on bated breath as they let the AED examine the patient’s heart rhythm. “Shock advised. Charging. Stand clear. Press the flashing button to deliver shock.”

“Clear?” Dr. Martinez made eye contact with each person standing around the patient. A chorus of clears rang out in response.

“Clear!” Dr. Martinez did a final call before she pressed the button to deliver the shock.

Cardiac arrests were not an uncommon sight in the emergency department. She’d see plenty more by the time she hit retirement. But it was usually older people, people who’d lived at least a somewhat long life. No matter how many times a child or even a young adult came into the ED like this it was hard on everyone involved. She always tried longer on kids. Despite knowing the very slim chance of them being revived. The chances were practically zero here. She mourned the fact that this was Brian’s first cardiac arrest with them. There was no chance any reasonable person would stay after this.

It wasn’t her first to wouldn’t be her last, but just like the others and the ones to come Cecelia Martinez knew she would never forget his face.

Especially since he did something frankly impossible for someone who had just received CPR and an electric shock. He sat up and screamed.

It was only years of experience that Dr. Martinez was able to dodge the kick sent her way. Brian was not so lucky getting clocked in the face with a fist.

“Hey, hey, hey. You need to lay down. You’re in the hospital, your teacher says you stopped breathing and you went into cardiac arrest. Can you tell me your name, do you remember where you were last? Or the date?” Dr. Martinez asked placing herself directly into the teenager's line of sight.

He placed a hand on his chest and took a slow deep breath. Something that had to be incredibly painful with broken ribs. “Huh, I-yeah. Danny Fenton. I was in my hotel room. It’s March 27th. Did you electrocute me?”

No obvious damage to neurological function. He got the date wrong but only by four hours, it was the 28th now. “Yes Danny, we did have to shock you. We’re going to have to run quite a few tests to make sure everything is working okay now.” And to see how he was even talking.

“Oh, no I’m okay.” Danny looked back where Brian was holding his shoulder where he was punched, and winced. “Shit, sorry dude are you alright?”

“How about you all go chart, or help Brian get ice or something for his shoulder. Lily let his teacher know he’s joined us back in the land of the living.” Dr. Martinez not so kindly giving them all the hint to get out.

Danny tried to hide a laugh in a cough. An interesting reaction for someone who had briefly died. “Young man I don’t think you realize what you just went through. I understand you are most likely in shock but you need to understand the gravity of the situation. Healthy kids do not just suddenly stop breathing, and we need to understand why.”

“It’s not a big deal, I promise. I just have sleep apnea.” Danny explained.

“Your heart stopped.” Dr. Martinez deadpanned.

“It’s a very serious condition.” Danny nodded his head like he was agreeing with her.

There was a knock on the door, opening just a moment after. Lily brining in Danny’s teacher. “War and Peace, Danny are you alright?”

“Yeah I’m fine.”

“No he is not” Dr. Martinez said at the same time. “We had to perform CPR. We’ll have to do tests to make sure everything has resumed functioning as normal as they can, as well as an x-ray to assess the damage to his ribs.”

“Of course. I have gotten in contact with his older sister and she is on the way, she should be here in a few hours. His parents are currently unavailable.” William Lancer explained.

“Jazz is coming?” Danny groaned. The most negative emotion he had displayed since he’d gotten here. “And hours? As in multiple? I don’t want to be here that long.”

“You’ll be here a few days minimum for observation.” Dr. Martinez said.

The boy flopped back onto the gurney with much more aggressiveness than he should have with what he just went through. “I don’t like hospitals.”

Dr. Martinez sighed. “Not may people do, doctors can be intimidating sometimes. White coat syndrome isn’t abnormal.”

Danny wrinkled his nose. “I don’t care about doctors. It’s too loud here, there’s too much death.”

It was quiet in the room, she wasn’t sure what he was talking about.

“I can leave the sooner I get those tests done right?” He asked.

“As long as everything is normal.” Dr. Martinez nodded. They wouldn’t be, they couldn’t be.

“As long as it’s all normal.” Danny repeated “Alright let’s get started.”

Dr. Martinez was reading the x-ray and other test results when Danny’s older sister arrived. She double-checked the results and viewed the images dozens of times.

Barring the traces of epinephrine still in his system, all the tests were completely normal. His ribs weren’t even broken.

But that wasn’t possible. She heard the bones break.

The best course of action she supposed was to talk to Danny and his sister. She made her way to the room they moved him to. She seemed to enter the middle of a conversation.

“I swear when I get my hands on him. He traps me in the middle of a dream and then I’m waking up thinking I’m dying again. And now they’re trying to keep me here for no reason!”

“I mean, technically in their eyes you did die. It’s a valid concern.”

“Still don’t see why it’s such a big deal though, I’m fine.”

“Normal people don’t recover that fast Danny. It of course would raise some questions.”

“How was I supposed to know how quick people recover from dying?”

“Common sense, I’d assume.” “Ugh. When do mom and dad get back?”

“Few days, you’re still stuck with me until then. Lucky for you in this situation. They’d have a lot more questions.”

Dr. Martinez opened the door fully making her presence known. “You must be Jazz. I’m Danny’s doctor, Dr. Martinez.”

“Nice to meet you Dr. Martinez. Thank you for taking care of my brother.” Jazz smiled shaking her hand.

“Well he certainly gave us quite the fright. It’s not often people come back from a cardiac arrest punching.” More like they never did.

“Well he’s always liked to exceed expectations.” Jazz nodded..“Do you have the discharge paperwork?”

“Discharge?” Danny’s teacher had said Jazz was one of the most responsible people he knew despite her younger age. And she wanted to discharge her brother? “Miss Fenton discharging him so soon-”

“Is well within my rights as his temporary legal guardian while our parents are unavailable.”

Dr. Martinez refrained from sighing. “And where exactly are your parents?”

“Out of the country at the moment.” Danny supplied. “Work trip.”

“I see. Regardless I can’t just let you leave just hours after you went into cardiac arrest.”

“Did my tests come back wrong?” He asked.

‘No, your tests came back completely normal.”

“Then I don’t see why I can't leave?”

“That is exactly why you can’t leave. We don’t even know what caused this.” She would rather have him stay voluntarily than try to chance getting a court order.

“I do know though.”

“You know?” Dr. Martinez found that hard to believe. “Why would that be?”

“Ghosts.”

“Ghosts?”

“That’s what I said.” Danny nodded.

Court order it was. “I’m going to step out and talk to your teacher. Please remain here.”

She stepped out the door. Finding William Lancer was not difficult, he was in the chair right outside the door. “Sir, may I ask you a question?”

He stood up. “Yes of course. Is everything alright?”

“Unusually enough, yes. But it has more to do with something Danny mentioned about the reason for his episode.” She rubbed at her temple. “He said it was because of and I quote ‘ghosts’.”

“Oh.”

“Yes. So you see why it wouldn’t be a good idea to let him leave.”

“I thought they wouldn’t be a problem so far from Amity Park.”

“What?”

“We didn’t bring any anti-ghost equipment for that reason. Obviously that was a major oversight on me and the rest of the schools staff on this trip.”

She was starting to think perhaps school was a code word for cult. Or maybe wherever they were from had some serious chemical leaks going on. “Could you please just talk to the two of them and try to convince them not to leave? I do not think it would be a good idea to let him go so soon.”

“Oh definitely. Even if it is ghosts that’s not something we can let go without making sure he is okay.” He nodded and went to open the door.

“Great Gatsby, not again.” William Lancer sighed as he entered the room.

“What? What is it?” Dr. Martinez asked pushing past him. Had Danny collapsed?

Danny had not collapsed, in fact Danny was no longer in the room. No one was.

But she had been standing next to the door the entire time. There was no way they could have left without her noticing. “Where did they go?”

“Back home, probably. Or well on their way there, I’d assume.”

“But how did they leave, we were standing infront of the door.”

He just gave a tired shrug. “It’s not the first time he’s disappeared with no feasible way to. Happens more and more by the year I swear. He wasn’t nearly this bad at fourteen. Still a handful, just a different way. But if he’s feeling well enough to sneak out there's not much I can do.”

“Do you think that their behavior is possibly linked to their parents?” They had mentioned that their parents were out of the country on a business trip. Perhaps they were taught to mistrust hospital staff by their parents out of fear of social workers.

“The whole family is strange, their parents are scientists to put simply. But not in the way you’re thinking. They’re just strange in a city full of strange people and strange things. If that is all, I do need to return to the rest of my students. Have a good night, or well a good morning I suppose.” He gave her a smile before walking off.

Dr. Martinez walked back towards her office thoughts cluttered. Ghosts, a perfectly healthy teenage boy’s heart stopping. The way he acted it was less that the shock reset his heart rhythm and more like it simply surprised him enough that his functions resumed their normal activities. His ribs broke, then they weren’t. He had no side effects from being shocked, let alone from going so long with no oxygen going to his brain. No one who knew him seemed to think the things going on were weird. Simply another day.

Brian was sitting in the extra chair in her office. He looked up at the sound of her entering. “How’s the patient?”

“Gone.”

“Gone? How?”

“Not sure, actually.” Dr. Martinez had seen almost everything as an ED doctor. Whatever just happened was a brand-new experience. “And it seems like I’m not paid nearly enough to figure it out. After today, I don’t blame you if you want to end your rotation early.”

“No! I want to stay.” Brian stood up.

“Really? Why?” Cardiac arrests weren’t easy on new students, kids were even worse.

“I’ve never seen or even heard about someone being this healthy and aware after CPR. It’s fascinating. I want to see more things like that that challenges our understanding of medicine.” Brian said as he pointed the notes he was writing down in her face.

Cecilia laughed. “You remember the phrase horses not zebras?”

Brian nodded his head. “Yeah of course. This was a zebra, right?”

Dr. Martinez shook her head. Once she finished charting she was going to forget about all of this, preferably with a strong drink when she got home. Too many unanswered questions and unexplainable events. Hell maybe it was ghosts. “You’re never going to see something like this again. This was a god-damn unicorn.”

#danny phantom #My writing #outsider pov #phic phight 2023 #phic phight team human

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misty-missdee · 10 months ago

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I gave you blood, blood. (gallons of the stuff)

#oh Dee #it me #went to doktor #gav mai blüd #trans #queer #nonbinary #i thought i looked cool #like comment subscribe to tell me im wrong #or right idk #haha #ha

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mxbitters · 4 months ago

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yeah so blood by mcr is a transgender anthem i just decided

SOBBINF CAME BACK FEOM ONE BLOODWORK THING THEN STSRTED MAKINF PHONE CALLS FOR PRE OP STUFF AND I REALIZED THEY NEED TO TAKE MORE OF MY BLOOD FOR SOMETHINF DIFFERENT AND OH COME ON. MY ARMS MY POOR BLACK AND BLUE ARMS

#IIIII GAAAAVE YOUUUUU BLOOD. BLOOD!!!!! GALLONS OF THE STUFF I GAVE YOU ALL THAT YOU COULD DRINK AND IT HAS NEVER BEEN ENOUGH!!!!!#that being said ok fineee i get it i just Misinterpreted but waaahhhhh

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fullcolorfright · 2 months ago

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What horror films do you think have the best practical effects? Which ones have the worst but are still fun?

I love practical effects so I really gave this one some thought! I’ll skip over the ultra-classics (The Thing, Alien) because they’ve already been talked up and for organization split this into 4 of my favorite eras: silent spectacle, midcentury monsters, splatter-action, and modern animation.

For me at least a lot of silent film effects are so pioneering that I’m wowed by the slightest thing they’re able to achieve, and the medium is also so necessarily visuals-focused that many of the true bombastic films are just showcases of incredible effects. I’d say your best options for seeing some truly impressive stuff are Dante’s Inferno (1911) (one of the first surviving feature films, so it really gets across exactly what they were capable of at the time), and Faust (1926), which goes all-out, creating a whole world of angels and demons.

The creature features of the 30s-60s were all about making fun new designs. I’d go for The Invisible Man (1933) for invisibility effects that impress to this day, and Black Sabbath (1963) for some terrifying puppet action.

Splatter-action movies can be a vehicle for some particularly flashy effects, and the 80s-90s were the peak of the craze. Here I’d recommend The Boxer’s Omen (1983) and Braindead (1992). In Boxer’s Omen, the effects are for a series of vibrant wizard duels, and in Braindead, for gallons and gallons of fake blood, sprayed full-force in every direction.

Some of the best practical effects I’ve seen in recent films have been in horror-animation- like silent films, these really allow the visuals to shine. The (mostly) stop-motion animated films The Wolf House (2018) and Mad God (2021) have been standouts.

As for horror with bad effects that I still enjoy- Any kind of safety or religious scare film. I’m thinking specifically of The Burning Hell (1974) and Think About This (1999). The ketchup blood is essential.

#asks #gore #blood #kind of a long response but what else is a blog for

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mtqcomic · 4 months ago

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decided to make some mtq incorrect quotes and thought that I'd put them here (sorry if they're out of character- incorrect quotes tend to do that sometimes no matter how much you shuffle the names to get the right characters ToT)(also I censored the swears in the quotes just in case)

Gendaen: Operation no more distractions is a go! not even 10 seconds later Gendaen: Oh, look! A butterfly! -

Gendaen: Ocàyuu, you risked your life to save me! Ocàyuu: And I’d do it again! And perhaps a third time! But that would be it.

alternatively:

Gendaen: Mysta, you risked your life to save me! Mysta: And I’d do it again! And perhaps a third time! But that would be it.

Eth: May Destiny (and this picture of Gendaen eating shredded cheese at 3 in the morning) be with you.

(they probably won't interact in canon BUT)

Gendaen: gets a text Oh! It’s Malvox. Zaïl, excitedly: Did it get me the stuff? Gendaen: Yeah, it says it got you the clown costume, the power drill, and 12 gallons of blood. Zaïl: Wow! Where did it find 12 gallons of fake blood? Gendaen: You wanted fake blood? Zaïl: Gendaen: I’ll go call Malvox.

(okay but this one might be canon /half joking)

Malvox: I am literally evil incarnate. Malvox: I’m not actually, I just enjoy being evil. Malvox: Which I think actually makes it even more evil because I’m making a conscious effort.

(he's thinking about his newest building project Eth, let the man think /lighthearted)

Eth: Are you listening to me? Gendaen: nods Eth: What did I just say? Gendaen: nods Eth: …

Malvox quotes are really fun because it is just so mean to everybody and there's a surprisingly large amount of quotes in the generator that are like that

Malvox: Let’s write Eth a friendly note, shall we? Dear… Incompetent… Dumb*ss…

based on that one post of Eth (you know which one)

Mysta: Question, how difficult would it be to bowl in a bee suit? Gendaen: Not that hard, I don't think, as long as you can move. Eth: I'd assume as hard as it is to bowl in a maid outfit. Eth: Wouldn't be any harder, but you'd get some WEIRD looks. Mysta: Are. Are you speaking from experience. Eth: No! Eth: Eth: ….Maybe.

Gendaen: Malvox, please calm down. Malvox: I asked for two large fries! Malvox: dumps fries onto table Malvox: But all they did was give me a MILLION F*CKING LITTLE ONES!

Zaïl, texting Yele: I’m a theif. Yele: Thief. Zaïl: Theif. Yele: I before E except after C. Zaïl: Thceif. Yele: No.

(the reunion, silly edition)

Eth: You gave me up, you let me down, you turned around, and deserted me. Gendaen: But did I make you cry? Eth: cries on the spot Gendaen: …Sh*t.

Zaïl: I’m a fool, not an idiot.

Eth: We always used to do the Wordle rather than take notes in class. Eth: To stop us the teacher would always threaten to tell us the answer if we didn’t pay attention.

(to be honest I have no idea what this quote is saying I got lost halfway through-)

Eth: I’m taking a look at your numbers, and it doesn’t look good. You have a lot of measurements. Quite a few variables. Mysta: Is that… bad? Eth: Variables are the #1 risk factor for outcomes. The past is a big contributor to the future. Mysta: Isn’t that just causality? Eth: Causality is the leading cause of death in this country. Mysta: So what are my odds? Eth: Do you have a family history? Mysta: Of what? Eth: Just, in general. Mysta: …Yes? Eth: Oh no.

Yele: Zaïl! I thought you were dead! Zaïl: No, just in deep cover. Yele: …But it was an open casket. Zaïl: It was very deep.

Mysta: I have an idea. Zaïl: A good idea? Mysta: Let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Zaïl: An apple a day keeps the doctor away! Malvox: An apple a day can keep anyone away if you throw it hard enough.

Everyone is giving advice to Mysta Eth: It's okay to ask for help. Gendaen: You're not a burden. Malvox: Murder is okay. Yele: Your feelings matter.

Zaïl, over radio: Testing. Testing. Yele, can you hear me? Yele, standing next to Zaïl: I’m standing right here. Zaïl: You’re coming through good and loud. Yele: ‘Cause I’m standing right here.

Malvox: Regular soda is too sweet! Ocàyuu: Diet soda has a weird aftertaste! Malvox: No! Ugh, oh my goodness. Diet soda is THE BEST! It doesn't have sugar! It's SPICY! Ocàyuu: It has other weird stuff in it! I'll take REGULAR sugar in my REGULAR soda! Malvox: It's SO SWEET like it's a dessert though! Diet feels more like a drink! Ocàyuu: I'm going to physically attack you. Malvox: Which is better, Gendaen? Gendaen: Oh, I usually drink water! Ocàyuu: Wha- NO! Malvox: DISGUSTING!

Eth: I think I need a hug… Gendaen: Good thing I'm hug shaped! 45 minutes later Eth: You… you can let go now. Gendaen: No, I absolutely cannot.

I feel like if anybody were to be the therapist friend it would be Ocàyuu. She seemed pretty chill from what we've seen of her

Ocàyuu, looking at the squad: Okay, so I need to become a therapist faster.

Zaïl: Dang it, the printer broke while printing out Gendaen's birthday invitations. Eth: Well, what are they supposed to say? Zaïl: "Gendaen's birthday". Eth: So, what do they say instead? Zaïl: "Gendaen’s bi". Eth: Eth: Works out either way.

I hope that everybody teams up someday it would be SO fun to watch-

Zaïl: So don't panic but one of us is possessed by an owl…. Yele: …. Gendaen: ��.. Eth: …… Mysta: ..Who? Zaïl: That's the thing we don't- Everyone stares at Mysta

would Zaïl play video games

Zaïl: You… you said I could trust you!! Zaïl: You said you were a GAMER!!! Malvox: Zaïl… I only play mobile games. Zaïl: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

why do I feel like Gendaen was a bit of a chaos gremlin on top of all the paragon hero stuff

Gendaen: Remember that time you dared me to lick a swingset? Eth: No, I said "Gendaen, don't lick that swingset" and you said "Don't tell me what to do" and licked the swingset.

during the Nelun Soma'o fight

Eth: …I'm pretty sure that shield is fire-proof, or something. Mysta, eyeing the boxes of explosives: Alright, but is it explosion-proof?

wise words, Zaïl

Zaïl: Fruits that do not live up to their names; passionfruit, grapefruit, honeydew and dragonfruit. Zaïl: Fruits that do live up to their names? Zaïl: Orange.

Gendaen: I think I did fairly well on my anatomy quiz! :) Mysta: I forgot I was doing a test. Gendaen: Mysta. Mysta: I said the vertebrae was the back stick because I thought it was funny…. Eth: Mysta.

Gendaen: Three of the four elements are represented as types of hockey. Air hockey, ice hockey, and field hockey. Fire hockey needs to be a thing. Eth: Fire hockey absolutely does NOT need to be a thing. Mysta: Do you care NOTHING for the balance of the four elements?!

to be fair she is a giant hivemind brain thing

Gendaen: I'm very scary. Ocàyuu: You're about as scary as a wet kitten. Gendaen: Wet kittens are cute, at least I've got that going for me. Ocàyuu: And small. Gendaen: Gendaen: …Yeah, yeah. I guess.

Mysta: Okay. Hypothetically speaking, how mad would you be if I burned a hot pocket so badly it could probably fall off a ten-story building and be completely fine? Yele: Mysta, what did you do? Mysta: Take a guess.

Malvox: I’ve been described as a ‘heartless villain’ and a 'little sh*t’, but I prefer… 'has alternative ways of having fun’.

Eth: Um. What kind of tea is this? Mysta: I boiled gatorade.

Yele: We just ate. Why are you making pancakes? Mysta: For the dogs. Yele: Why are you making pancakes for the dogs? Mysta: They don't know how.

Mysta: Let's all agree that going up the stairs on all fours is actually the best experience on earth. Gendaen: Conversely, going down the stairs on all fours is actually the most terrifying experience on earth.

Gendaen: I made lightly fried fish fillets for dinner. Eth: Gendaen, It’s 1:15 am, what the f*ck. Gendaen: Do you want the lightly fried fish fillets or not. Eth: Well, I mean yeah. Gendaen: So come downstairs while they’re still hot. Eth: Wait, you just made them? Gendaen: Yeah, I wasn’t tired so I decided to make lightly fried fish fillets. Eth: Say lightly fried fish fillets one more time Gendaen.

I can never figure out what the possessive for the it pronouns are *faceplants* (/lighthearted)

Ocàyuu, about Malvox: Its covered in blood again. Why is it that its always covered in blood? Gendaen: Well, it looks like it's its own blood this time.

Mysta: on the phone Hey Eth, do you know my blood type? Eth: Of course, it's B-. Mysta: Oh, I guessed wrong. Excuse me, nurse-!

for some reason some of those quotes are giving Legend of Maxx energy. I can absolutely imagine Maxx saying "slunchy"

Gendaen: Problem, I can't tell if this food is over-sauced or undercooked. Zaïl: Solution, just pop it back in the oven for another 10 minutes. There's at least a 50% chance that'll fix it, right? Eth: Result? Food has somehow become unpleasantly soggy and unpleasantly crunchy at the exact same time. Mysta: No better time than this to pull out my favorite word! Slunchy! Yele: …put it away.

Zaïl in these quotes is kind of giving cool cousin energy

Yele: It’s Pride Month, you know what that means! Mysta: I get to eat as many Skittles as I want? Eth: What? No! What has Zaïl been telling you? Zaïl, walking in, pouring Skittles into their mouth: Taste the rainbow, b*tch.

I mean they do canonically have a gun

Zaïl, holding a gun: If the conspiracies about life being a simulation are true WHOEVERS CONTROLLING MY SIM I JUST WANNA TALK.

Malvox: I refuse to apologize for being weird or off-putting or slightly evil (or more than slightly evil). That’s actually your problem. I’m having a fantastic time!

Eth: We need a plan to beat them. Mysta: Okay, listen up. First, we fill their shoes with wet cat food. Eth: Mysta: Judge me all you want, I get results.

what kind of conversations do you think they'd have

Malvox: Sometimes I like to place my hands on someone’s cheeks, look into their eyes… Malvox: …And violently jerk their head until it snaps. Gendaen: …That took an unexpected turn. Ocàyuu: So did their neck.

Eth: What do you three have to say for yourself? Zaïl: Gendaen: Mysta: Oops?

Gendaen, to the Squad: The real secret to immortality? Not dying. You want to be immortal? Okay, that’s easy. Just don’t die. That’s it. Refuse to die. There you go. Mysta: But how- Gendaen, ignoring her: “But how”, you may ask. Well, easy. Just don’t do it. Refuse to. Say “no thanks”.

Gendaen: Don't quote me on this, but I believe murder is illegal!

if Gendaen somehow convinced Eth to wear a cat maid outfit then I think this isn't entirely out of the realm of possibility either

While planning to break in somewhere Gendaen: Hey, let's do "Get Help!" Eth: What? Gendaen: "Get Help." Eth: No. Gendaen: C'mon, you love it! Eth: I hate it. Gendaen: It's great! It works every time! Eth: It's humiliating. Gendaen: Do you have a better plan? Eth: No. Gendaen: We're doing it! Eth: We are not doing "Get Help!" A Minute Later Gendaen, carrying Eth: Get help! Please! He's dying! Help him! throws Eth at guards, knocking them out Gendaen: Ahh, classic! Eth: gets up I still hate it. It's humiliating. Gendaen, laughing: Not for me, it's not.

aaand that's it for now I will be back with more

maybe

byeeeeeeeeeeee- *disappears in a puff of smoke*

Certified Canon ✔

#obviously not everything here is in character per se but honestly most of it is surprisingly accurate #even the gendaen ones and he's barely said anything all comic #i also really appreciate the malvox ones. i think you get why it's my favourite character to write dialogue for #and wow you actually typed the diaeresis in Zaïl's name every time. good work #really appreciate this!#ask #ask dk

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sleepyhomosexual · 1 year ago

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" i gave you blood, blood, gallons of the stuff "

bloody vampire nurse gerard, anyone? <3

#gerard way #mcr #mcr fanart #my chemical romance

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phoenixwatchesmovies · 11 months ago

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2023 Favorites

I'm kinda glad I was keeping track of what I watched, in retrospect, because looking back over my posts this year, I realized I forgot about a lot of stuff. XD After looking over the recaps and excluding rewatches, here's my top ten New Stuff I Watched for 2023:

10. Cabinet Of Curiosities

Bizarre nightmares unfold in eight tales of terror in a visually stunning, spine-tingling horror collection curated by Guillermo del Toro.

If GDT is your guy, give this a watch. Creature features, cursed objects, aliens, you name it. 8/8 tentacled eldritch abominations.

9. Wolf Creek

Three backpackers stranded in the Australian outback are plunged inside a hellish nightmare of insufferable torture by a sadistic psychopathic local.

Holy shit, this was intense. And as I said initially, so mean. If you're into Texas Chainsaw Massacre, try this. I'm into franchise bingo, so I'm going to look into the sequels and TV series. 3/3 heads on a stick.

8. Requiem For A Dream

The drug-induced utopias of four Coney Island people are shattered when their addictions run deep.

I get the feeling this is one of those that hurts so much more on rewatching, so there's that to look forward to. I've also rarely seen movies that do so much harmonizing between the music and the visuals, and it was so satisfying. 4/4 refrigerator jump scares.

7. Evil Dead Rise

A twisted tale of two estranged sisters whose reunion is cut short by the rise of flesh-possessing demons, thrusting them into a primal battle for survival as they face the most nightmarish version of family imaginable.

This was probably the most fun I had with a horror movie all year, TBH. Horror exploring family dynamics will always be a fave, and this brought plenty of fresh stuff to the franchise while also holding onto the core traits. 5/5 Staffenies.

6. Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves

A charming thief and a band of unlikely adventurers embark on an epic quest to retrieve a lost relic, but things go dangerously awry when they run afoul of the wrong people.

This was the most fun I had watching a movie all year, period. If you know nothing about DND, it's a good fantasy movie. If you're a DND nerd, the game mechanics are baked into it. If you're a fan of found families, guess what! 6/6 stealth checks.

5. Cowboy Bebop

A ragtag crew of bounty hunters chases down the galaxy's most dangerous criminals. They'll save the world--for the right price.

I got exactly what I wanted out of this, so haters be damned. The anime is a masterpiece and a classic, but if you're not in the mood for the existentialism and other heavier themes, here ya go. 3/3 shower-bath-showers.

4. The Black Phone

After being abducted by a child killer and locked in a soundproof basement, a 13-year-old boy starts receiving calls on a disconnected phone from the killer's previous victims.

Near perfect, as far as I'm concerned. The older I get, the more kids-in-danger as a concept fucks with me, making this the most stressful movie I watched this year (though It Chapter One gave it a run for its money, and I still think they would make a great double feature). 5/5 black balloons.

3. Evil Dead (2013)

Five friends head to a remote cabin, where the discovery of a Book of the Dead leads them to unwittingly summon up demons living in the nearby woods.

It's gnarly. It's badass. I almost puked. I had THE BEST time. The story works as an effective allegory, the effects are gruesomely awesome, and the finale is metal af. Plain and simple. 70,000/70,000 gallons of fake blood.

2. The Crow

A man brutally murdered comes back to life as an undead avenger of his and his fiancée's murder.

Beautiful, sad, aesthetic for days, hella good soundtrack. *chef kiss* I still haven't seen The Batman, but they seem visually similar, so if you like that, you'll probably like this. For more in-depth thoughts, read my post. 1/1 epic rooftop guitar solos.

1. The Fall Of The House Of Usher

To secure their fortune (and future) two ruthless siblings build a family dynasty that begins to crumble when their heirs mysteriously die, one by one.

Not just a new favorite Mike Flanagan. A new favorite in general, and my number one for the year. I just screamed about this one last month, and I don't have anything more to add. I've seen Succession comparisons, and while I have no idea how accurate that is, there's my "if you like that, here's this." Holy crap. 7/7 deadly sins personified.

Happy New Year! 🥂

#yearly round up #watch a thon 2023 #tfothou #the crow 1994 #evil dead 2013 #the black phone #cowboy bebop netflix #dnd honor among thieves #evil dead rise #requiem for a dream #wolf creek #guillermo del toro's cabinet of curiosities

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