#I felt like it was more important to inform people right now of what happened with screenshots than make yet another essay abt how this suc

[atangledfate]

Of course everyone's eyes went to Vector as he went ridged as a board! Of course they weren't wrong he had been there to get her and the others off the shuttle. But truth was they split up shortly after landing but he had a feeling he was gonna get chewed out! He felt backed into a corner and honestly! alot happened so fast and he wasn't even hired to look after her--- but here he was being glared at by everyone!

" WOAH WOAH hold yer dang horses! I did what i was asked ta do, i got her on the ground! and we did it without crashin' and everything! but then she says to me... i need to get to the command center and buzzes off before i can stop her! i sent Charmy after her but i ain't seen neither one... so i'm just as worried as you! "

Espio sighed and gave a sideways glance as Vector got very defensive at the stares.

" To be fair... with our track record... its a miracle we managed to land without crashing... but Vector is right. Jewel was anxious to get here... and at the time we were moving people to the infirmary. If she didn't make it here... i pray Amy's attacker didn't get to her first..."

Miles was concerned by this information, and the fact Vector said nothing was classic Vector. but in his defense he probably assumed she was here and gone already or off doing something more important. He didn't blame Vector for losing her so much, and he sent Charmy with her. The kid was alot of things but he wouldn't have left Jewel alone...

" Belle has the right idea, we'll check security and see if we can find her. Also check for Charmy i bet the two won't be to far apart... Knowing Jewel it would have had to be real important for her to deviate from her duty as Director... she's always been dedicated to her work..."

he sighed

" All we can do now... is wait... "

===========================================

the teenage Bee struggled against the debris as he pushed himself up from where he'd nearly been crushed. The only thing he could think to do was push Miss Jewel into the Cell with Rough and Tumble and hope she would make it. Looking up at the sky from the hole in the roof it seemed like a piece of the airship had fallen and got snagged on an upper high way. When the airship finally crashed it fell down into the prison.

Ten years ago he'd have been to small and weak to do anything, but he was a teenager now. He and Vector fought alot about the risks he took and, how brazen he could be. Maybe he as right, he was pretty messed up but at least he could fly. Luckily his helmet seemed to have saved his head from being cracked open.

Charmy buzzed up into the air holding his busted shoulder and looking around for help. That's when he saw the green flash of motion and he was sure Vector would call him dumb or foolish for flagging her down! heck she might just laugh at him!

" HEY! HEY! GREENIE! OVER HERE!! oww... my shoulder... "

He winced landing on the street so she could reach him.

" I'm gonna get so grounded for this... i just know it... or worse V will take my drivers license away... maaaaaan this bites! "

"Well, what of Director Jewel? She surely has to be on the base, correct?" If Blaze was being honest she had taken notice to how they had yet to show up to the command center yet. The feline was sure there was a lot happening, though it had been some time since all this started and it would've made sense to have seen Jewel arrive at the command center by this point.

"I can have Belle Bot keep an eye on the camera's for her, though she has to be on the base since she was with The Chaotix and they made it here. Belle Bot, connect to the surveillance and keep a look out for Director Jewel. If you see her then state where she is." The Belle Bot eyes would change to blue and tap into the camera feed, looking for Jewel.

"A lot of unnecessary work when we can simply ask them where Jewel went," Kitsunami said as he looked at the Chaotix. "So, what did she run off to that was more important than trying to help deal with G.U.N?" A rather blunt and harsh way of wording it, though the fennec spoke his mind regardless of how it came off. Besides, he did have a point that her running off to do something else wasn't ideal right now.

"Calm down, everything is going crazy and I wouldn't be surprised if a ton of people are asking her what's going on and what she's doing about it," Rowan said, standing up and stretching a bit. "Though now that I think about it, there is another who's opinion we should get. Which would be the giant momma Wisp flying about the place. I can't imagine she's too happy with all the Wisps that are stressed out right now."

===========================================================

"All I said was that I didn't know her." Surge never got around to talking to her, though about the only one's she really made any effort to talk to was the others on the team, and for some odd reason that Belle chick after she patched her up. "I'll still do a run around after I drop you off." The tenrec would grab Lanolin's hand. "Hang on tight I guess." She's never ran with someone in tow before unless she was trying to hurt them. Without anymore delay she sprinted off towards the infirmary.

[reel-fear]

So... Mike's response to concerns about the lack of diversity in Bendy was basically 'Well clearly in this photo we did not create or make [from my understanding it's taken from a documentary and edited] Norman is white so really you're the morons here. Of course, he's white fuck you for thinking otherwise.'

It's a bad time to be a Bendy fan this is genuinely so low and such a mean-spirited way to treat your fans.

I genuinely need a moment to recover from this. Mike said the books aren't canon as a way to dismiss concerns about their designs but now here he is clearly implying Norman is white in canon too so why did any of this matter?

I need to like... Lay down. This is so tiring and genuinely, just hurtful. I feel bad for the poc in this fandom right now, I hope everyone who reads this is okay, and genuinely if u need to, take a moment to step away from this and just breathe.

[qlossytbh]

𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐞 - 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐢𝐝 𝐱 𝐛𝐚𝐮!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 you were in an accident and both you and spencer are figuring out how to deal with it.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 angst, typical criminal minds content, reader gets beat up, physical violence, descriptions of physical injury’s, lots of freaking out, mild panic attack, angst + comfort, established relationship

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 2.5k

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 this fic is inspired entirely on billie’s eilish’s the 30th. haven’t been posting but i’ve got a lot of almost finished drafts and requests im getting through atm

𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐢𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 | 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

Sometimes, Spencer hated his limitless memory.

Because of course, it worked wonders when he had to remember important dates, or endless facts that came remarkably handy in cases. Things no one else even considers remembering. Amazing for remembering favorite things of his favorite people, or remembering things they’d previously mentioned liking.

It was amazing until it found ways to haunt him.

He remembered when Morgan pulled to a stop, glancing up at the red light in front of him. He remembered when Penelope typed away aimlessly in the back of the car, reading out a few connections she found between this particular Unsub and the third and hopefully last victim. Everything was fine.

They almost had the case figured out. Hotch had called in, (exactly twenty-three minutes ago) informing them that that you and Emily had a lead on the whereabouts of the Unsub.

He remembered the tone in Morgan’s voice when he picked up the phone. “What?”

Both him and Penelope had glanced his way absentmindedly, not really thinking much of it.

“Do they know who yet?” He had asked, taking a sudden sharp turn towards the left. The pair watched as Morgan’s face fell, and his grip on the steering wheel had tightened. He remembered the look on Penelope’s face as she quickly glanced over at him, who probably looked equally as worried, if not more. Something hadn’t been sitting right, at all— he remembered from the second the day had started something inside him was telling him that.

“What’s going on?” Penelope's voice was shaky when she set her computer down to the side. Spencer just kept his eyes on Derek, narrowing them slightly at the subtle gulp in his throat and the way he nervously looked over at him. Not Penelope, him.

“Derek—“

He remembered when he told him that you had been hurt and how he was unable to think of anything else.

He looked forward towards the road, avoiding the way his co-worker and friend sat up in his seat, straining against his seatbelt as his chest turned to face him. “I don’t know exactly what happened, Hotch just told me she was ambushed and they’re now waiting on the ambulance.”

“Ambulance?” He could’ve sworn his heart dropped into the very pits of his stomach.

Penelope covered her mouth, tears already boring into them with a soft gasp that came from her mouth. “Is she okay?”

Derek’s mouth twisted into a straight line as he opened his mouth to speak and Spencer swore he had never felt as much panic course through him.

He didn’t usually freak out, but he swore his head just stopped working right there and then. All he was able to think about was getting to you. “They don’t know—“

“Drive.” Spencer told Derek. With a firm nod and no room for complaint, he stepped on the gas pedal, signaling on the sirens as he swerved through the streets.

Six minutes and thirty five point two seconds.

That's how long it took for them to get to the scene, where two ambulances and cop cars seemed displayed around the small suburban home. He felt time move as if it were in slow motion.

The car hadn’t even come to a stop and Spencer was already stumbling throughout the door, pushing his shaky legs towards the already chaotic scene.

Unbearable noises surrounded him— people clattering and shouting about, orders being thrown around aimlessly, sirens and bypassers stopping to gasp and gaunt at the scene.

Two officers were down on the floor, covered by a simple thin white cloth and he felt the nausea settle in. Just the thought of one of them being you made his knees grow weak and the bile quickly hike its way up his throat.

Before he could rush around in attempts to find you, his eyes landed on Hotch, hunched over a moving stretcher surrounded by about three, maybe even more, medics.

It all seemed visceral. An automatic response. Soon enough his legs were pushing him towards the stretcher that made its way towards the ambulance. “Hotch—“

He turned around, and allowed just enough space to reveal your absolutely destroyed form. Your eyes kept fluttering open and close, seemingly bothered by all the noise and light. Your breathing sounded strangled, covered by the oxygen mask you had on but the sound alone was something Spencer was sure would haunt him until the day he died.

He still remembered.

Spencer felt like he had been punched in the stomach. All he could do was push one of the medics aside and hunch over you as you fought against the universe itself to regain consciousness.

“Hey,” He cooed, voice tightening and nearly breaking in a cry. He cleared his throat and blinked through his tears, smiling down at you.

You couldn’t say a single word, but you mustered enough strength to lift your pinky, grazing it against his knuckles. Your face showed a much different reaction though, furrowing your brows in what seemed to be excruciating pain.

“She’s mostly unresponsive,” The medics informed. Spencer followed them alongside Hotch, until they got to the ambulance, clicking the stretcher upwards.

“Hey, listen to me,” He whispered, ducking down so he was closer to you. “I love you, okay?”

Your small fist grabbed the fabric of his shirt, not wanting him to leave your side, but it was hurting you too much to hold on. Your fist feebly fell and the medics somehow pushed him off and you were taken into the ambulance and he really didn’t know if that was the last time he’d see you.

He watched the doors slam shut, frozen completely in his place. He remembered watching the ambulance drive away and having to stop his legs from running after it. He remembered Hotch trying to grab his attention from the disappearing ambulance.

He remembered thinking non-stop but for the first time ever, wanting to stop it and not being able to.

Something so alarming started to awaken within him and he wasn’t really sure what to do with himself.

He spent thirteen hours and sixteen minutes in the hospital that night and next morning. Hotch and the others came by in turns to keep him company in the cold empty waiting room, but he didn’t budge.

The second to stay the most was Emily, given how she was also attacked at the scene but much less severely. She ended up with a few bruises and scratches— she silently wished it had been more.

Maybe then the damage on you would’ve been less.

He remembered sitting with Morgan and the others when the doctors came in, informing him that you had gone into hypovolemic shock and they needed to perform an emergency surgery to stop the internal bleeding that was causing your vitals to plummet.

Spencer even remembered, word by word and syllable by syllable that there was a high chance that you may not even wake up from the surgery due to how much trauma your body had received.

Three broken ribs, dozens, maybe hundreds, lacerations scattered across your arms and stomach, a ruptured spleen and a concussion. That wasn’t even including all the bits of physiological trauma you now had to attack once— and if— you woke up.

Spencer seriously felt his resolve to remain calm crumple the second the medics mentioned that the Unsub used a metal pole to beat you nearly to death.

He had asked for every detail and he remembered each one and how utterly hopeless they all made him feel. He cried, because he simply didn’t know what to do with himself. He didn’t know how to fix it, or how to help— he wasn’t even sure he could.

Because what if he had been there instead of Emily? What if he was able to stop it? What if more backup was sent in, what if when you had told him you felt off this morning when going into work he’d tell you to stay put and rest it off? What would’ve happened then?

What if he would’ve gone with Emily instead of you, what if you were actually lifeless when they had found you? What if you didn’t wake up? What if this meant he’d never get to hold you for a last time, and had to stick with the memory of seeing you bloody and bruised. What if you never actually—

“Reid,” Spencer looked up from his palms, which holstered themselves on his knees by his elbows. Emily smiled at him meekly. “She’s awake,”

Spencer looked around, blinking heavily and realizing he was in the same cold hospital waiting room he’s been in for the past day and a half.

He opened his mouth to speak, but realized it was incredibly dry. Too dry. He cleared out his throat with a firm cough and nodded, standing up feebly.

They walked down the quiet hallway, something so heavy hanging in the air. Just the patterning of his shoes and Emily’s heels bouncing off the walls along with the shuffling of their clothes. Spencer swore he wouldn’t be okay until he saw you but even then he didn’t think he’d be okay. How was any of this going to be okay?

Emily led him to a door and when they pushed it open, you were staring at the wall, seemingly in some kind of deep whirlwind of thoughts. A small knock offered by Emily caught your attention. You turned your head to the side, probably expecting another endless round of nurses. But to your surprise, there stood the one person you’d been wanting to see after this whole ordeal.

A broad yet tired smile made its way onto your face while laying back into the pillows. Spencer took you in, letting out a shaky breath. Your hair was disheveled, and your eyes looked tired. Soft and welcoming but hiding something so much deeper underneath that he’d have to be an idiot to not notice it.

There was a stitch on your forehead and the lash line of one of your eyes protruded a growing dark purple bruise. There were machines and cables and needles stuck beside and into you. And the more Spencer noticed, the more he wished he hadn’t.

“Hey,” Your voice was raspier than usual, small and steady, Spencer noticed this.

But then you smiled just like you used to before the accident and he couldn’t have found you any more beautiful.

“Hey,” He finally answered, walking up to the side of your bed. “How— How are you feeling?”

“I’ll give you guys some privacy.” Emily said, slipping past the door and leaving the two of you to your own accord.

“I’m okay,” You whispered, sounding so small and frail it nearly broke any ounce of self control he was mustering to avoid breaking into tears. “The pain meds are helping a bit,”

He gave you a silent understanding nod. His hand held onto the railing of your bed, not entirely knowing what to say or how to act. You watched him intently, noticing how he couldn’t really bring himself to look at you.

“Do you remember anything?” You turned to stare at the wall, trying to recall anything about the attack, but you unfortunately— some would argue fortunately— didn’t.

You shifted in your bed, scrunching your face in pain in the process, which Spencer noticed. Again. Of course he did.

Spencer looked down at you, dangerously entering territory where the back of his eyes burned, and his own mind bit at him, and he just didn’t know what to do with all the huge feelings that swarmed around inside him.

“Not really,” You muttered, scrunching your nose with a small huff. Spencer reached over, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear and letting his hand cup the side of your cheek.

“You really scared me,” You leaned into the touch of his palm.

“I’m sorry,” He shook his head before he even spoke, blinking rapidly to prevent any tears from falling.

“I’m just glad you’re okay.”

“I almost died,”

Okay, they were starting there. Great.

You had said it in barely above a whisper, staring at your lap and preventing Spencer from getting a look in your eyes. Your lips tugged into a frown. And Spencer said your name, trying to catch your attention.

Suddenly it all hit you. The gravity of it all. It came in stronger than a tidal wave, than a slap you didn’t even see coming. You felt the burning in your ribs, the rips and tears in your skin, the slight swell of your eye, the rattling of your own skull.

Spencer pulled out a chair and sat on it to level himself to your height. He reached out a hand and laced his fingers with yours.

It felt hard to breathe.

More silence.

“You okay?” You sucked in a sharp breath that came out as a little squeak, and suddenly you wanted to cry. Because you were tired of feeling so broken and feeling how every inch of your body hurt.

You shook your head and as soon as you did, a broken sob left your mouth. Your hands flew up quickly, attempting to hide the broken fragments of your gaze. Spencer heard every shard of the glass his heart had been made of around you shatter. He sat up, attempting to hold you from the side in any way he could, letting you cry out all the trauma you received in the past two days.

And you did cry it out, and your ribs burned, your head was pounding and you felt every ache and bruise in your body worsen. Seeing you like this hurt him more than any pain that had ever been inflicted on him.

Spencer pulled away from you once you had calmed down enough and brought one hand to the side of your face, leisurely dragging his thumb against your cheek bone and anywhere any stray tears fell.

“Dang it,” You sniffled, bringing the back of your palm up and rubbing your nose. “This is not how I wanted you to see me after my mini coma,”

Spencer knew you couldn’t keep serious for more than fifteen minutes at a time even if your life depended on it. He’d let you stall the situation this time however. He knows the two of you needed it.

“You look so pretty,” You smiled at his words, looking at him with so much gratitude and leaning into his palm, trying to find refuge in it.

“I bet I do,” You narrowed your eyes at him and he leaned forward pressing a kiss to your lips. You grabbed the wrist of the hand that held your face while he kissed you and gave it a small squeeze, hopefully letting him know how much you cared and appreciated him.

He pulled away, sitting back into the chair but intertwining his fingers with yours, reminding himself to always drag his fingers comfortingly across your knuckles and allow you to know he wasn’t ever leaving your side again.

“They had to change my IV needle,” You decided to stall for a bit. “The vein on my right arm wasn’t doing the job.”

“Really?” He knew that wasn’t entirely possible and that the doctors probably did an ass job at inserting it there in the first place, but he let you wonder on. “How’d that feel?”

“Im afraid of needles, but!-“ You shuffled a little bit around on your pillow for more comfort, huffing proudly. “I squeezed my eyes and tried thinking back on that book that talks about marxist criticism you read to me last week,”

He smiled warmly, bringing your hand over to him and kissing your wrist. “My brave girl,”

You let out a laugh, and he knew then he’d sleep a little better that night. He always did when you were by him.

“Hey Spence,”

“Yeah?”

“Can you stay?” You asked earnestly.

Spencer squeezed your hand. “Your pain meds are hitting you stronger than you thought if you think for a second that i’m leaving your side,”

You smiled. “I’m not going anywhere angel, I promise.”

The two of you basked in each other's silence. You closed your eyes and tried to alleviate the burning in your lungs as your breath shaked from the crying. Spencer just watched you, appreciating a while longer the small freckles and marks across your face.

“Spence,” He hummed, “I’m scared.”

He sighed heavily. Suddenly realizing that this wasn’t something easy to come. And he was too, because he almost lost the love of his life and he didn’t know what that information would do to him, much less to you.

For the first time, Spencer was out of smart answers and reasons why this would all be okay. It was hard for him to think he’d never feel this scared of loosing you again, and that idea haunted him.

“So am I,”

[gotham-daydreams]

Chapter 3 Sneak Peak/Teaser:

Some additions have been added for the sake of it, and may not appear in the actual post when Chapter 3 is up. However, they do serve as a little glimpse into how certain characters feel at the moment. Glimpses which aren't exactly shown in the final post either, at least not like they are here.

Regardless, I hope y'all like this little piece of what's to come!

-----

Tim felt his heart leap to his throat. No way, had he really...? No. No, he couldn't get his hopes up... but he just couldn't help himself. Could anyone really blame him? After all this time, he finally felt like he was getting close, but he couldn't be too sure. No, no. Not yet. Though right here, right now he would. He would confirm it, and make himself certain. There was no way around it. ... Yet his heart rate increased as his hands began to shake.

No way, he thought. No way.

[...] He had to be sure. He had to be certain. He couldn't afford to be wrong. Not this time around. Not over you.

[...]

He almost couldn't believe it, staring at the document where he had listed all of the information he gathered from his search.

... He had done it. He finally did it.

[...]

Tim just looked at his screen, still processing all that had happened, suddenly feeling unsure. 

Should he just keep this to himself, so that he could go after you? The others didn't know yet… they didn't have to know yet, this was a golden opportunity. Should he really be giving this up?

Though of course he just had to run his mouth before thinking things over. Of course.

[...]

Maybe... this whole thing wasn't such a good idea after all. Not with how he went about things, not with how he acted and just spit out the most important thing he had found without thinking, just out of spite.

If only he had gone about it differently. Then maybe he'd be with you instead of him.

--

Somewhere in your heart, you knew it couldn't last forever — and as if hearing your worries, an abrupt knock echoed throughout the apartment.

If only you had listened to how your heart stopped.

[...]

You made your way to the door, and yet here — right at the foot of it, an odd feeling began to blossom in your chest. You couldn't make sense of it, but as you reached for the knob, you found yourself stopping. It didn't feel like a good idea to open the door, and though you couldn't figure out why, you just took a small breath and pushed the feeling to the side. 

Clearly, you were having a weird night, but just to humor yourself you decided to 'comply' with whatever this feeling was, and check who was at the door by looking through the peephole instead.

It was only then did you understand.

[..]

Your heart leapt from your chest to your throat when more knocks came, basically pounding against the door. Fuck. They were getting impatient.

[...]

Your hands were sweaty, your heart was racing, and you could hardly stand still as you waited and waited.

Life in Gotham had always worked in mysterious ways, but this was too much too soon. Despite months having past, in the moment, it felt like it had been days since you had left. Like you had barely just gotten a taste of freedom, of love and appreciation — only for it to be stripped away from you. To be taken by the very people you once turned to for such things.

Perhaps even staying in the city was too close. Maybe you should've moved farther away when you still had the chance.

[...]

Oh god, you were really doing this.

Not wanting to waste any more time, you took a step forward and tried to take a breath. Trying to calm down your heart a bit as you gathered your composure, and acted as normally as you could manage.

Walking forward, you rounded the corner, and there he was in all of his tainted glory.

[...]

The way he looked at you made you feel uncomfortable to say the least, and his whole demeanor was nothing you had seen from him before. Not directed towards you anyway, and you couldn’t help but struggle trying to remember the last time he smiled at you in person, but maybe you had just gotten used to seeing his back turned to you one too many times. Maybe you had just grown too familiar seeing his smile in photographs and painted pictures, instead of real life.

[...]

Your heart felt heavy in your chest, and despite how you tried to ignore it, you could feel that something was wrong. Though you just chalked it up to how you aren't used to them talking with you, or smiling towards you or anything. Or you tried to anyway, but you were slowly beginning to doubt it.

[..] On any other occasion you'd try to let it go, but doing so didn't feel right. It felt stupid, and almost as if you'd put yourself in more danger by trying to, so for now you'd just keep it in mind. Even if nothing came of it, at least you were being cautious, right?

.. All you could do was just hope that this would end as quickly as it started. For both your sake and their's, but mostly for your own.

[...]

The absence of sirens in the air and occasional gunshots didn't sit right with you, and even the amount of people driving by wasn't as much as it'd usually be. The city didn't feel busy, let alone as alive as it would've been on any other night, and it bothered you. It was like some sort of silent evacuation was going on, or a lock down of some kind that not everyone was informed of. There were more whispers than there were shouts, and a kind of awkward peace instead of striking violence and chaos.

You couldn't believe it, was this Gotham's first real quiet night?

CRACK.

Perhaps you spoke too soon.

[..]

It was only then did you really take a look around, and notice how the people you passed by looked equally tense and nervous. An unsaid but shared feeling of tension and anxiety hung in the air, and now that you noticed it — you couldn't ignore it.

[...]

Small beads of sweat began to roll down your neck. Your hands felt clammy, and you tried to steady your breathing once you realized it was wavering. You tried to fix any outward reaction you noticed you were displaying before they could catch on, fiddling with your sleeves as you tried to reassure yourself.

You were going to be okay... right?

[..]

So, you tried to ignore how the pit in your stomach continued to grow with each second that passed. How each sound caused you to tense, and sometimes jump the smallest bit, but you tried to ignore that too.

... Seconds turned into minutes, and it was only now that you fully realized how long this short walk felt. The sidewalks stretched on, and the streets never seemed to end.

The longer time dragged on, the worse you felt. The more you wanted to get away and just shove them aside. You didn't want this, you thought you wouldn't see them again after leaving, because why would you think otherwise? After all that time of them treating you like you were never there? And now this?

Just this whole situation was giving off mixed signals, but the worst part about it? It made you feel like you should've given up sooner, and who knows? Maybe you should've.

[...]

At least now you were able to take a breather, even if it was only temporary. With someone familiar that you actually felt comfortable enough to be around. To talk with, and exist in their space.

Sure, you'd have to step back outside eventually, but for now? You didn't have to. Not until the order was ready, and you'd have to face them again. Though that wasn't now, was it? For now you could just... be.

To think you'd feel so grateful just to be able to breathe in your own space.

To think that they'd try to take that away from you too, but you wouldn't let them. You couldn't. Not freely or willingly anyway.

You had given them enough, why couldn't they understand that? Why did they suddenly want to have what you tried to give them so long ago? Haven't they realized that the opportunity has already past, and they're the ones that let it happen? Maybe. Maybe some of them do. Maybe some of them did. They were smart like that, after all. Some had to know. They had to.

But not this one. Otherwise he wouldn't be here.

[shiftinglea]

Death doesn’t exist.

Interestingly, in order for me to accept that I was the creator of my life, I had to learn more about death. It was a missing puzzle piece that allowed me to remember that I am God and can manifest whatever I desire.

But before that, I was quite doubtful about my ability to create. I would persist and believe (or try to anyway), but underneath all that, I had this encompassing fear of failure. Fear that by the end of my life, I would still not have succeeded with my manifestations. Fear of dying in regret and disappointment for not experiencing the life I desire.

And I thank my soul for guiding me to the book “Home with God” by Neal Donald Walsch, which allowed me to remember that there is no death. This book is a dialogue between the author and The God (aka the source of everything). When I was reading that book, it didn’t feel like I was learning something new. It felt like remembering something I already knew.

And in this post, I’ll be sharing information about death from that dialogue. Obviously, it’s your choice to believe it. But I would recommend you not listen to your mind. Listen to your soul; it speaks to you through your feelings. Intuition. Allow yourself to FEEL the information I’m sharing. Do not use logic for that; it’s quite limiting. So here we go:

Learning about death allowed me to stop fearing dying in regret and disappointment, which then produced confidence in my manifesting abilities and feeling at total peace every single day. There is nothing to be afraid of. Why? Because death doesn’t exist, and this is what I mean by that:

When people speak of death, they mean the end of life. But your life never ends. It’s the physical body that dies, and then at that moment, you discover that you are still alive. You keep on existing just in a different form. Death is simply an experience of leaving 3D and entering another dimension. And what’s the most fascinating thing: it’s different for everyone, or the experience of it is more like. Same with your life in physical form: it’s different for everyone depending on your beliefs, perception, and assumptions. You choose the experience of your life (consciously or unconsciously). The same with death: you choose your own experience of it. But what’s the same for everyone is that “death” has 3 stages.

The first stage is the same for everyone. “In stage one, at the moment of your death, you will instantly experience that life has gone on. This will be the same for everyone. There could be a brief period of disorientation, as you come to realize that you are not with your body, but, instead, are now separate from it.” During this stage, you realize even though your body died, your life hasn’t ended. For most people, it will be the first time they realize that they aren’t their bodies. The body is something you have. It’s not what you are. And then you move into the next stage.

The second stage is where everyone’s experience is unique depending on their beliefs about what happens after death:

• If you believe in reincarnation, for instance, you may experience moments from previous lives of which you have no previous conscious memory.

• If you believe that you will be enfolded in the embracing arms of an unconditionally loving God, that will be your experience.

• If you believe in a Day of Judgment or a Time of Reckoning, followed by paradise or damnation for all eternity, you will experience being judged and the judgment will turn out exactly as you imagined it would.

• If you died thinking that you deserve heaven, you will immediately experience that, and if you think that you deserve hell, you will immediately experience that. Heaven will be exactly as you imagined it would be, as will hell. If you have no idea about the specifics of either, you will make them up right on the spot. Then, these places will be created for you that way, instantly. You may remain in these experiences as long as you wish.

What’s important to know is that there is no Hell. But you can create hell for yourself if you choose to or believe that’s what you deserve.

However, you won’t stay there for one moment longer than you choose to. The moment you decide that you are done experiencing it, it’s finished. The same with Heaven.

Everyone remembers in the 2nd stage that they create their reality: in the physical and spiritual. In the physical realm, our creations may be delayed. But in the spiritual realm, our manifestations are instant. So you can experience whatever you desire for however long you wish. You can relive your life again or create a new one and enjoy that life for however long you want, and it will feel as real as in 3D. So during the 2nd stage, souls remember that they create their experiences and it’s instant. When they are done experiencing their creations, they move to the 3rd stage.

During the 3rd stage, you experience Ultimate Reality, which is merging with the Essence (God/Creator of all). You are enveloped with the infinite source of love and peace. You become one with The Creator. This is where you came from. It’s pure void. You are a pure being.

Every aspect of itself, every “good” and “bad” trait the soul thought it had is being absorbed by the Creator. It melts all shame, pride, fears, every character trait and leaves the soul with a beautiful emptiness. Experiencing nothing but Oneness. “Now you are merged with this Light and you feel dissolved. This “melting” completes the change in your identity. You no longer identify yourself in any way or at any level with the separate aspect of being that you called “you” in your physical life.”

The most fascinating thing is that you can experience the merging with everything during your physical life. This is what the void is for. When you reach the void state, you merge with Oneness where creation is instant.

During the 3rd stage of death, you can stay merged with the Creator for as long as you desire. But you won’t stay there forever because that’s it’s not what you desire. Because if you stay forever in this pure bliss and ecstasy, you would stop identifying it as “bliss” and “ecstasy”. Because there is nothing else there. There is no opposite of that. So you will desire to recreate yourself anew and choose your next physical incarnation because that’s the only way for you to experience your own magnificence.

The purpose of death is to reestablish your identity and to help you remember who you really are: One with God, an infinite source of creation. The purpose of physical life is to experience this knowing.

I want to point out the importance of your system of beliefs because they shape your life and your death (during the 2nd stage). You are constantly creating your reality. In physical life and after that. Some people think different rules apply in death (or in life). But no, it’s the same rules, the only difference is that your creations are instant after death. But again, they can be instant in your physical realm if you choose to believe that you can create instantly. It’s all about your beliefs and assumptions.

For most people who aren’t into LOA and don’t know that that’s are creators of their reality, their “death” will be the moment of remembrance that they are indeed creators. That they never stopped creating and they will see it clearly. But they don’t have to wait until death to experience themselves as God and creators. You can do it in physical life. It’s always your choice. You shape your life in physical and your life in spiritual.

For me, knowing more about death allowed me to stop feeling anxious about whether I’ll manifest my dream life before I die. The fact is that I never die, I just change my form. Life is eternal. It’s the body that dies. But you are not your body. It’s something you have. It helps you to experience wonderful things that you have chosen to experience.

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

Are You Sure?! - Episode 7 Observations

9.5/10 ☆

Something clicked for me in the latest AYS?! episode. After years of following these two people and getting excited for any interaction or information regarding them, it was now perhaps the first time when watching them felt like not witnessing something special. Oh, I know how this sounds, but it's not what you think and I will explain.

When I say it didn't feel special I meant that nothing felt like a novelty. You know how shocked and excited we all became when Jimin called Jungkook during a birthday wlive? Or the collective metaphorical screaming on social media every time one would get close into the other one's space in some behind the scenes clip? That reaction for me was also a result of having to see that in a larger context in which jikook were not always the main focus.

Now with AYS?! and seven episodes in, I'm used to basically everything. The evening and morning routine, the soft talking, the flirting, the playfighting, the way they eat together. The nakedness and all the tattoos on display. I've developed a tolerance to it. And episode 7 really helped in cementing that. Yeah, they're half naked in a hot spring. Of course they are. They're brushing their teeth and do their morning skincare routine together. Of course they are. Jungkook buys the snacks and Jimin is in charge of feeding him. Of course. They laugh at the same things and everything is funny when they're together. Of course they do. They're playfighting again? Why would anyone be surprised at this point?

And I love that we got here. It's everything I wanted without ever thinking that it could be possible. It is extremely satisfying and fun to watch them. It has always been, but AYS?! was an open window into their lives together in a way that it hadn't happened before.

Sapporo is a special segment for many reasons. And as much as it's fun to see them have a good time, the impending military enlistment looms like a shadow over their trip. Jungkook is the one who seems intentional in talking about it in a way that makes light of the situation, while Jimin is more on the silent side.

But all this inevitably made me think of a downside. Because how am I suppose to go back to waiting for an aknowledged look while Jimin and Jungkook would sit at opposite ends in an interview setting? Or not doing a wlive together? Getting minimal interactions because there's 5 other people there? It would feel like something is not right. Jimin and Jungkook come in a package and they do everything together. They laugh and never get bored together. Jungkook cooks for Jimin while Jimin fills the exact needed space and purpose in that kitchen. Jimin can talk about learning to snowboard with Jungkook's friends and that conversation to remain between them and no one else. They can take showers together and then act like stupid boys in some endurance contest in the freezing water and it's their own thing and theirs only.

AYS?! Sapporo is bittersweet. For Jimin and Jungkook because as much fun they have, they know that their remaining time of freedom is getting to a close. Snow is beautiful there and they are together, but in a few weeks whatever sentiment that might evoke will be in the back of their minds when their reality will be completely different. That's why making those last minute memories together was so important. And they knew that and Jungkook felt the need to say it out loud. Like a constant reminder of how special those few days were.

And it's bittersweet for me too. While there's always the option of rewatching, who knows when such an opportunity (and privilege) will arise once again? Maybe never. Maybe AYS?! will be the first and last time to be able to take a peak through that window at their life...

[evelynpr]

Genshin Official Relationships and Status

Something to take note off in character relationships is what their "official and known" relationships are. So, I decided to try to make a chart of one with the playable cast and some extras.

This is a draft though. If you have criticisms and comments, absolutely please do leave them because I don't think my interpretations of these government systems are that accurate.

Anyways, here they are! The higher the placement, the higher the authority. Distance does not apply, and the legend is in each of the pictures.

Mondstadt: That's a lotta knights

They can be split between the Church and Knights, but the Church is still under the Grand Master as far as I know.

Power is surprisingly concentrated to 1/2 individuals only for a nation of freedom...Mond you gotta work on that...

Jean, Diluc, Kaeya, and Lisa are arranged the way they are in reference to the Klee summer event where they passed on who was looking after Mond.

Diluc still retains his high position because he has so many high credentials and connections (The Darknight Hero, Mond's richest man, high status in an intelligence network), despite being the Ex-Cavalry Captain.

Rosaria is an official recognized nun, but her vigilante works are by her own accord, hence the colors.

I am not sure whatsoever where Jean and Barbara's father, the Cardinal, should really be placed, or if he even still holds the position.

Poor Noelle does so much more Mond, but is lowest in status...please just make her a knight already T__T

Liyue: Zhongli and his powerful lesbians

I really am not sure if Ningguang is who Liyue's closest "leader", but that is how I felt during most of Liyues events

I'm assuming that the adepti now have a lesser status in Liyue because of the shift in power to the humans during the archon quest

How high Beidou's status is is, completely informal. She's right beside Ningguang because they do find each other to be equal competitors in their own way.

Those directly connected to Zhongli are those I assumed to have taken direct orders from him, hence why Beidou and Keqing are not included although they do respect him as their archon (Keqing in her own way)

I feel like I'm missing people here, compared to Mond, so uh, help me out here-

Inazuma: They just had a civil war...woops

I am reallyyy unsure how to label Sangonomiya island's status. Are they under the shogun? Are they their own separate territory?

Otherwise, Inazuma is pretty straightforward with its 3 factions and families

Sumeru: The whole government was just overthrown

Are there like, genuinely so sages right now, or replacement Grand Sage??? Nahida you need to do something asap-

Scara doesn't exactly have equal status to Alhaitham as Acting Grand Sage, but I felt it was more important to show that Scara is working directly under Nahida

Speaking of which, the title "shadow" is used because it's the same role that Ei served to Makoto, which I find poetic. If there is an official or better title tho, I'd love to hear it.

Hopefully, as time passes, there will be more representatives from the desert with high status. Poor Candace is carrying the desert's status on her back-

Should I have included the Corps of Thirty even if there are no playable characters...?

Fontaine: Fancy Schmancy Titles

I honestly reallyyyy wished that Neuv and Wrio were on equal standing, but in the eyes of Fontaine, that probably just isn't true.

Even so, absolute do not underestimate how important Wrio's role is in Fontaine's justice system, because without the Fortress functioning as it is, so much of Fontaine's justice would fall apart.

Despite Furina's death penalty and retirement, I still believe she deserves the title of archon with the highest status. No matter what happens, she is still Fontaine's idol and savior. (Besides, if she wanted/needed anything, Neuv would give it to her.)

How high Navia, Clorinde, and Chevy's statuses are in relation to each other in reality is...not explicit?

Really, Clorinde is just another employee under Fontaine's justice system, and isn't a head in anyway, while Chevy and Navia are actual leaders. But, Clorinde is the best Champion Duelist, so does that make them cancel out...?

Anyways that's all from me! It's pretty interesting to me just how much of the cast are part of their respective nation's government, which only makes sense given the kind of ruckus the traveler causes. Have a good day!

[queenie-official]

Part One Of Summer Love: ‘Camp Wookiee’

series masterlist celebration event camp logo

pairing: Modern!Anakin Skywalker x fem!reader

word count: 11.4k Next part

in hindsight, you probably should have been listening to what the camp director, Bail; was saying. in your defense no one else was, which you would later find out was because they've all heard the same speech, rules, and warnings a dozen times already.

you were busy scanning over all the faces on the screen- well the ones who had their cameras on anyway. each person you'd seen so far was shockingly attractive, a few people in particular caught your eye. A girl, Padme Amidala. A boy, Ben Kenobi. and lastly the executive director who was simply watching Bail speak to make sure it was done correctly, Qui-Gon Jinn.

the only thing that snapped you out of your admiration was the sound of your phone pinging, thankfully you were muted. glancing at your phone you saw the contact belonging to your best friend Honey and made the instant decision that she was far more important than what was happening on the Zoom call.

so you not so secretly reached for the mouse and clicked the camera button off, relaxing when you knew no one could see you anymore.

'how's the call going?' her first message read, followed by 'anyone cute on the staff 👀' making you snort.

you lean back in your chair while you type back 'i think it may be a requirement to be at least an 8/10 just to get hired’ you watch as three dots appear on the corner of the phone screen.

'well it's a good thing you're absolutely stunning 😚' you read when her message finally sent and you can't help but smile big. you loved this girl, she always knew what to say to make your day brighter even on an already sunny day.

you're about to text back when the Camp Director's words finally get your attention "And i think that's everything you'll need to know! now if you have any questions feel free to message me or Qui-gon Jinn privately. though i would like to remind you all, most of the basic information you need can be found directly on the Camps Website." shit you really should have been paying attention, they were supposed to went over the different roles that would be at the camp more in-depth during this call.

like hell you'd reach out to either of them privately and admit you weren't listening though, you bite your lower lip and slink back into your chair. "We look forward to welcoming you all to Camp Wookiee in person, see you in two weeks" Qui-Gon says right before ending the Zoom call leaving you staring at your computer screen blankly. fuck.

╚═*.·:·.✧ ✦✧.·:·.*═╝

in the end it was Honey who had helped you calm down from the freak out you had after the Zoom call, and two weeks went by faster than you thought it would.

you still had a day before you had to be at the camp but because of how far you lived you planned on leaving within the next couple of hours.

"i think you need to calm down" Honey says from where she's sat on your bed, she'd been watching you run around her and haphazardly chuck things into your suitcase that you knew you'd need based on the email that was sent out last week on what would be supplied for you at the camp.

"i'm calm" you rush out while running a hand through your hair, pushing down the slight panic you felt in your chest. man you really should have paid attention on that call.

"you're going to be fiiiine, i doubt they'll kick you out of the camp for something as small as not paying attention during a Zoom meeting- that wasn't even mandatory by the way" to her credit she makes some good points, however the zoom meeting was highly encouraged for newcomers and you fall in that category.

“it's not like they're going to quiz you y/n" you let out a groan at her words whilst shoving the last of the items you needed in your suitcase and zipping it up.

"i know, i know- i just don't want to seem irresponsible" you huff while plopping down on the bed next to her. "or embarrass myself because i probably missed a massive amount of information" definitely missed a massive amount of information more like- the call was an hour long…

"whatever they told you in the call they'll definitely go over again at the Camp, we've been over this." Honey reaches over and lightly pinches your arm making you laugh as you pull away. "and before you say 'we don't know that for sure' we do know that for sure because it's supposed to be a staff of forty and only fifteen of you were actually on the call" she raises a pointed brow and you let out a sigh knowing she's right.

"okay, i'll try my best to not panic the whole ride to the camp" you say with a half smile, standing up and stretching. "i should probably leave now if i wanna get there on time tomorrow" you mumble glancing at the time on your phone, 8:30 pm.

"are you sure you don't want me to drive you? i just don't think it's wise to be driving all night and then be exhausted for the actual first day there" she'd already offered at least ten times and you'd already declined what felt like a dozen more.

"i'm sure, worst case i'll be a little sleepy but it's not like i'll be taking care of the campers the first day. staff has to show up a week before to get more comfortable in their roles" you say confidently, it was the one piece of info you did learn from the Zoom call before you started drooling over how attractive each member of the staff was.

"mhm, well i'll carry your pillow for you" she said while making a kissy face at you jokingly.

"awww thanks, how generous of you to leave the heavy stuff for me to carry" you say with a roll of your eyes as you begin to lug your suitcase down the stairs.

"really? no thank you kiss" Honey feigns hurt before snatching your pillow off your bed and quickly catching up to you.

"all of my kisses are reserved for my future love" you joke, and Honey purposely bumps into you with her hip before you can get to the door making you sway ever so slightly.

"lame, no boy deserves your love- they all suck" fair point you had to admit, honestly you only signed up to work at the camp for the social interaction. the most you plan is to have a hallway crush on one of the staff members just to save you from boredom and then forget about said crush as soon as you return home in the fall.

you pop the trunk of your car while Honey locks up your shared house. she was going back home for the summer to visit family, not wanting to be left completely alone for months on end and become a statistic. her words, not yours.

"i guess this is goodbye" she says with a finality to it, putting on her best sad voice. you laugh as she throws the pillow she was holding in the trunk and closes it.

"you make it sound like i’m dying or leaving forever" the drama from this girl, it’s not like you’re much better though. she fake sniffles and places a hand on her forehead putting on her best damsel in distress performance.

"my love is going off to war and she jokes as if she isn't leaving me for two months" there’s a smile peaking through as she speaks and you can't help but laugh, throwing your arms around her in a hug.

"i love you so much, i don't know how i’m going to survive without you" you say half joking as you go along with her antics. truth be told, you really don't know how you're going to survive without her. you both spend just about every second of every day in each other's company and even when you aren't you message so much you might as well be hanging out in person anyway.

you checked the Camp's Website before you applied and know that they do have wifi for staff and the kids mostly in case of emergencies, but just because there is wifi doesn't mean it's good wifi. it's the middle of the woods after all, you'll be lucky if photos even go through.

you both pull apart with matching toothy grins on your faces. "text me when you get to the camp?" Honey asks and you nod knowing she just wants to make sure you get there safe.

"of course, text me when you get to your parent's house?" you watch her smile grow wider while opening the car door.

"always" she responds while you climb in and buckle. "see you in two months" she shouts once the door is closed, you roll the window down and she pokes her head and arms through so you can both share one last slightly awkward hug.

"see you in two months, don't forget me while i'm gone" you say with an exaggerated pout as she pulls out of the window, standing a few steps back from the car so you can pull out of the parking lot properly.

"how could i forget a face like that" you hear her say as you roll the window back up, blasting the air conditioner.

╚═*.·:·.✧ ✦✧.·:·.*═╝

the actual drive to Camp Wookiee wasn't too bad, you know excluding the fact you were up all night. but every negative has a positive, the positive of this being you managed to make it to the camp an hour before you needed to be.

turning onto the gravel road sent a chill up your back, a mix of excitement and nerves. the yawn that exited your mouth showing the exact opposite of that though and the closer you get to the end of the drive the more tired you realize you are. you make a mental note to take a nap once you've parked.

pushing down another yawn as you pull into the staff parking area you immediately do a double take and decide against a nap not even a minute later. there were five cars already parked side by side, and a group of people standing in front of one just chatting.

you only recognized one of them because he was on the Zoom call, Ben Kenobi at least that's who you think it was. It'd been two weeks so maybe you were mixing up names. either way, you avoid making accidental eye contact with any of them making sure to focus entirely on parking in a straight line.

now to sit in the car and pretend like you hadn't been seen or to get out and greet the four men? you ask yourself with your hand hovering over the keys, debating whether to turn off the engine.

you look at your side mirror taking in the three men you didn't recognize. all tall- one of them was bald, another with a blonde buzzcut and lastly a boy with curly sandy blonde hair, you couldn't see his face though.

he was turned completely towards the man who you were pretty sure was Ben. after weighing your options you decided staying inside the car seemed like the best option compared to meeting four men at once.

you'd rather run into four bears, after all you didn't know what kind of people they were and you certainly didn't want to find out by yourself. maybe when more staff got here you'd be braver, in the meantime you shift your hand from hovering over the keys to the volume knob. turning up the music ever so slightly to drown out any chatter you may hear and leaning back in the seat, unbuckling yourself just to be a little more comfortable.

you look out the windshield taking in the beauty of the forest, the green from the trees reflecting slightly onto your car thanks to the sun. it was serene but short-lived as you jump from someone knocking on your window.

"sorry didn't mean to startle you" Ben said carefully as you rolled down the window. "we saw you pull in and realized you must be the new girl" he said while pointing his thumb over his shoulder, clearly referring to the three men he was originally standing with.

"new girl… like singular?" you blink confused, wouldn't there be other new girls- oh no what if you were the only new girl and the rest of the new staff were all guys?? you felt a bubble of panic begin to brew in your stomach.

"well new worker in general, everyone else working this year are returning Staff from last year." well that's almost worse, at least if it was only guys you'd still have a chance to befriend people. the staff all already knowing each other meant they'd already formed their clicks leaving you to fight for a way in. so much for joining the camp for social interactions, looks like the most educated conversation you'll be having is with some 10-year-old about whatever cartoon they're into.

you press your lips into a thin line before forcing a small polite smile. "my name is y/n" you extend your hand to him and he shakes it with a somewhat firm grip.

"Ben Kenobi, don't suppose you want to come with us onto the actual campgrounds?" you knit your brows together in confusion, turning to the clock thinking your car might have fucked up again and given you the wrong time. Ben seems to read your mind though, letting out a soft laugh before speaking up. "you're not late if that's what you're wondering. Windu is one of the camp directors, he's been setting up since 7:00 o’clock this morning along with Jinn. as long as they're here we're allowed on campgrounds even before the official start time."

okay so maybe Honey’s gotten into your head with all of her true crime stories. you relax at his explanation, reaching over and turning off your engine. "yea i'd appreciate that because i have no clue where i’m supposed to go in all honesty." he nods, taking a step back so you can climb out of the car. it felt nice being able to finally stretch out your legs after the long drive.

"i'll introduce you to everyone. Come on, oh and you can leave your stuff in the car for now. you won't know which cabin to put it in until later anyway." you give a small hum of acknowledgment and lock the car behind you before following after him.

as soon as you came to a stop in front of everyone all eyes were on you, maybe it was the height differences but you honestly felt like a little kid. "this is Windu, one of the camp directors" Ben introduces and when he politely offers you his hand with a somewhat stern look you shake it.

"don't let him scare you, he's nicer than he looks. his face is just stuck like that" you turn your head to whoever made the jab; the boy with sandy blond hair. his eyes are a beautiful shade of blue and he wore a smug smile on his face- he was probably the prettiest boy you'd ever seen.

you want to laugh but aren't sure if it'd be appropriate considering the man he was making fun of was your boss, but when Windu just rolls his eyes with a sigh you get the idea that this is a normal occurrence around here.

"I'm Anakin" he introduces himself and sticks out his hand for you to shake, you shyly take it and his hand engulf yours. there was a confidence to him you noticed or maybe an arrogance but who were you to judge someone you just met?

"ignore him y/n, he's an idiot who'd probably turn up late if he hadn't carpooled with me" Ben interjects pulling your attention away from Anakin, your hands slipping from each other in the process.

"hey i'm never late" He denies but judging from the smile on his face and the lack of actual sincerity in his voice you could tell he didn't even believe himself.

"yes you are and the only times you're not is when i drive you" Ben says with a roll of his eyes and Anakin throws his hands up in defense. you can't help but smile, holding back a laugh as you watch the two interact. it was clear just how close the two were from how they bantered but the fact they carpooled together confirmed it for you.

"I'm Rex" the last man spoke up, he had a small smile on his face, one that seemed endearing like he too enjoyed watching Anakin and Ben's dynamic.

"like a T-Rex?" you ask jokingly, it felt like the natural thing to do. if they all could tease each other who's to say you can't either; when Anakin let out a snort followed by a few snickers which then morphed into genuine laughter when he saw Rex's disgruntled face you felt like you'd made the right choice.

Rex rolled his eyes but smiled after shoving Anakin away. "looks like you're gonna fit right in here y/n" he said while crossing his arms, and you couldn't help but beam.

╚═*.·:·.✧ ✦✧.·:·.*═╝

so much for fear of having to fight a way in, you'd spent the last hour just getting to know Ben, Anakin and Rex. Windu had to go back to actually helping prep with Jinn and Bail.

throughout the hour more people had shown up and made their introductions to you, and as it turns out everyone got along with each other. well in their own way, there was definitely some not-so-secret animosity between some people but they didn't let it interfere with the general welcoming feel of the whole camp.

eventually, the introductions stopped and the only reason you got anyone's name was because Ben whispered them over to you.

"good morning everyone!" the chatter throughout the room quickly died down as Qui-Gon Jinn's voice echoed throughout the Log Hall. "i'm going to make this brief since all of you have heard this speech before" you felt your stomach drop, right everyone working this year was returning staff besides you.

so much for Honey's 'remain calm because they'll go over it again for the people who didn't show up on the call' advice. despite the fear you couldn't wait to text Honey and say 'i told you my fears were valid' the second you got to the room you'd be staying in.

"Today is all about settling in, so don't get too worried that we're putting you to work immediately." he said with a smile and teasing tone. if only it had the calming effect he'd intended it to have.

"Mace Windu has posted all of the info about where you will be staying, who you'll be bunking with, and which cabins you'll be responsible for on the wall over there" He motions to where Windu is standing on the opposite end of the lodge and Windu waves back.

it was pretty clear that most of this speech was meant for you and you alone given the fact that everyone else was on their phones or having hushed conversations. it made your cheeks flush slightly but you were internally grateful.

"additional camp roles are next to your names on the roster as well, and remember campers will be arriving Monday morning next week. in the meantime relax, enjoy yourselves, get used to the environment and we will see you for dinner at 5:00" he finishes with a clap of his hands, and the room erupts into loud chatter again.

"i wonder who y/n will be partnered with, she's the outlier" Rex questioned out loud, you angle yourself in his direction and he begins to clarify himself. "we've had the same partners for the last two years." you quirk a brow wondering how that's going to work, with you here there was an odd number of counselors.

"they're putting us counselors in groups of three this year" Ben states, he seems to always manages to answer your unasked questions. "i asked Jinn a few weeks ago when i heard they were hiring a new staff member."

Anakin rolls his eyes from his seat beside you, why he chose to sit there instead of spacing out more like Rex and Ben did you weren't sure; but the small heat radiating from his thigh onto yours and the tickle of his skin every time his arm brushed against you kept you from wanting to voice the question out loud.

"of course you asked, honestly i don't get why you don't just apply for a position as Camp director yet" Anakin huffed and you bit back a smile.

"if i did that you'd be out of a ride, Camp directors arrive even earlier than counselors." he retorts.

"aww you really care about me" Anakin joked, putting a hand over his heart and laying it on thick. you couldn't help the giggle that bubbled out of you and could only wonder if this is how people felt when watching you and Honey interact with one another.

Anakin turned towards you looking happy just to have made you laugh. you could get used to his attention on you that's for sure, looks like you found that hallway crush for the summer.

"i think you're partnered up with Padme" Ben says effectively interrupting whatever moment you and Anakin were having. you remember that name, she was the girl you had admired on the Zoom call- natural beauty that's for sure.

you had a feeling you two would get along, what you didn't like however was the feeling you got when you noticed Anakin light up more than you thought humanly possible just at the mere mention of her name. shit.

"oh here he goes" Ben says as Anakin begins to rant about just how gorgeous and amazing Padme is, Anakin just continues like he didn't hear him say anything at all. "he's had a crush on her since his first year working at the camp" Ben says directly towards you, the information not news to Rex.

this just served as another reminder that you were the only new person working at the camp this year, what a shame too. you could get over it though, you'd only known Anakin for what? a little over an hour maybe. at the very least you two had a good connection so friends it was.

you hadn't noticed but you started to resign yourself from the conversation as Anakin went on and on about Padme making Ben and Rex tease him even more. voices blurred together and you found yourself completely tuning out the world around you- maybe this was going to be a little harder than you thought.

a tap on your shoulder tethered you back to reality, you turned completely to see who was trying to get your attention.

had she somehow gotten even prettier in person? Padme stood behind you with her long curly brunette hair pulled back into a ponytail to keep it out of her face and off her neck. she was wearing her camp Issued T-shirt already, it was cream-colored with the Camp Wookiee logo right in the middle.

"hey! I'm Padme" she says with a smile extending her hand. her smile was perfect and made you feel guilty somehow, how could you feel negative about someone who seemed as sweet as they were beautiful? you shake her hand whilst mirroring the same smile on her face.

"i'm y/n, it's nice to meet you" all you could think was that her and Anakin certainly would make the most stunning couple. if he had a crush on her since his first year did she just not realize or not care.

the latter made your heart flutter with hope which you quickly shoved down with disgust at just how quickly you managed to crush on him. Honey would be so disappointed in you or eat up every second of this, probably both knowing her.

"sorry if this is kind of random but i just checked the roster and saw that we were partnered up. well you, me and Jasmine but she's already headed to the cabin we'll be staying at and responsible for." she spoke with a sugar-sweet tone, not the kind that made you feel sick to the stomach; when she spoke it was genuine kindness not a single ounce of malice to be found. "i was going to head there now but figured you might want to walk with me since i'd be easier than finding it yourself. trust me the signposts can get confusing quickly."

"that would be amazing, thank you so much" you say while standing up. you hadn't noticed the silence coming from the three boys until Rex and Ben finally spoke up to say their goodbyes to you.

Anakin seemed a bit awestruck by Padme's presence alone, it was kind of funny to see. you give him a knowing look while simultaneously pushing down that nasty taste that began to cling to the back of your throat. he smiled thankfully not noticing any changes in your behavior and gave you a soft goodbye of his own.

"come on, i'll help you carry your stuff from your car." Padme said and began leading the way out of the hall.

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a groan of relief leaves your body as you finally plop down on the bed in the cabin. your spine burns with pain before melting into comfort as you relax all the muscles in your body.

the part of the cabin you were staying in wasn't super spacious but it was cozy, there were two bunk beds and to your surprise, Padme and Jasmine chose separate bunks. maybe they weren't close but you still figure they'd rather bunk together than with a stranger or maybe they both just wanted the top bunk and that's the actual reason they didn't choose the same one, you didn't bother asking.

you went with the bottom bunk of Padme's, you may not know either of the girls but at least she'd gone out of her way to help you find the cabin and explain how everything was going to work.

according to Padme, there are a bunch of different cabins all with different names. the one you'd be staying at was called Naboo, Anakin and Ben were at the Coruscant cabin, Rex was staying at the Alderaan cabin.

each cabin has the same layout; there's the staff cabin room where the counselors stay which is directly connected to the room where the campers will be staying because it's easier to supervise them that way. then there's a bathroom with multiple stalls and a shower room for everyone in the cabin to use. simple really but not like you needed anything fancy.

the staff cabin room itself has two dressers to be shared amongst whoever's staying there, you and Padme were sharing one and Jasmine had the other dresser too herself. you didn't mind, both you and Padme were pretty conscious about the space you took up so you both managed to fit everything you brought into one out of the two long drawers.

you turn your head to look over at Jasmine, she was beautiful. she had fine long black hair and hazel eyes that seemed to lean more green in the shitty cabin light. your joke with Honey about being at least an 8/10 to be hired was not really feeling like a joke anymore. speaking of Honey, you really should text her.

just as you're about to pull out your phone Padme walks back into the room; she'd left to use the bathroom after helping you settle in. you smile at her when you both make eye contact and she's quick to plop down on the edge of the bed next to you.

Maybe you were imagining it but there felt like a small tension in the air, not between you and Padme but between her and Jasmine. perhaps it was the way Jasmine furrowed her brows the second Padme entered the room or the way she turned to face the wall and focus extra hard on her phone but something was definitely off- lots of puzzle pieces you itched to put together.

"so y/n" she started and you sat up to make more room on the bed before she continued. she happily took up the silent offer, moving to sit properly in the middle so you guys could face each other criss-cross applesauce. "what brings you to Camp Wookiee?" ah so this is going to go the 21 questions route, sorry Honey looks like you're not getting updates anytime soon.

"i just thought it would be fun and a good way to meet new people" plus the pay at this camp in particular was extremely good but you weren't going to say that out loud.

"well good news the people here are great" you swear she mumbled 'some more than others' at the end of that.

"anybody you'd recommend i avoid?" you ask unable to brush it off.

"i-" you watch as her eyes briefly flutter over to Jasmine before she clears her throat and locks eyes with you again. "i'm not sure that's my place to say, but i can say you've done a pretty good job so far of choosing who to hang out with." that was genuine and so was that tension you sensed earlier.

"Anakin, Ben and Rex you mean?" she nods while leaning back onto her hands a bit, letting whatever negative thoughts she held towards the third person in the room roll off her shoulders.

you and Padme clicked pretty quickly after that, and throughout your talk you learned what you'd be in charge of once the campers arrived. you'd be partnered with Anakin and Rex at the arts and crafts center which you were a little bit more excited for than you'd care to admit. she was in charge of the zip line course this year along with Ben, the three camp directors deemed them both the most responsible which seemed to check out.

time seemed to fly talking with her, she had an easygoing air about her that made conversation flow naturally- what on earth could Jasmine have done to make someone like that not like her? weird.

you decided that you'd make it your mission to find out after you discovered she shared the same favorite dessert with you, followed by your favorite book. after all someone with as good a taste as that has to have a valid reason not to like another person.

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you both kept chatting while walking side by side to the Log Hall for dinner with Jasmine not far behind. when you enter the Hall you're flagged down by the boys almost immediately.

"you can go sit with them" Padme said after realizing where you were looking.

"you don't wanna sit with them?" you ask curiously as you both move into the food line.

"i don't mind it.." she trails off while grabbing an apple to put on her tray.

"but you'd rather not." you finish her sentence for her. "i thought you said they were good people?" she hands you a pudding cup with a reassuring smile when she reads the confusion and worry on your face.

"they are, i'd just prefer to spend my time with my friends" she says while pointing with her chin to a group of girls on the opposite side of the hall. "you're welcome to join me, i just figured you'd want to be with them." she shrugs her shoulders, the choice was up to you.

you go through the rest of the line stuck in an internal debate as your tray fills up. it's not that you didn't want to sit with the boys, just you really wanted to sit with Padme and maybe you'd get along well with her friends; but then again the boys clearly wanted you to sit with them.

already having to pick sides and you're not even a full day in yet, you had to fight off the urge to audibly sigh.

"any chance your friends would move tables?" the question tumbled out of your mouth before you could think twice. was it rude to ask that? too late now.

"maybe tomorrow" she offered, and you couldn't help but frown. it was a perfectly reasonable answer just not the one you were hoping for.

"no it's okay actually, i'll just sit with you guys." this time she frowned.

"y/n i promise i won't be offended if you wanna go sit with them instead of me" she said with a laugh half teasing half sincere.

"i knoooww, but i wanna sit with all of you guys" you grumble, ever the indecisive person and always the people pleaser.

"okay then how about the boys come sit with us" you raise a brow as she turns to them, waves and then points to her table. they get the idea and stand up with their trays, you feel a little guilty for having them move but they didn't seem to mind at all.

there's a bit of an awkwardness at first as both groups learn to navigate around each other. you notice pretty quickly how almost polar opposite the boys are from Padme's friends. her friends were as calm and easygoing as her, the boys were full of energy and teasing- well Ben and Rex seemed to be able to reign it in a lot more than Anakin. which to be fair they already had calmer vibes than him anyway.

"she's great right?" Anakin asked you quietly with a nudge of his elbow. he chose to sit next to you again, there was plenty of space for him on the bench to scooch down but it didn't seem like he was aware of that. more likely he was and simply put just didn't care. you raise a brow, "Padme" he added quickly before you could ask.

there's that taste again. you push it down, taking a scoop out of your pudding cup as you nod "yea she is, we get along well too" you answer honestly making sure to sound more enthusiastic than you felt.

the blinding smile he gives you at the confession makes you wish you'd chosen to just sit with the girls alone. pitiful. "what're you two whispering about?" Padme asks with a smile and a look in her eyes that you couldn't decipher.

"just about how great it's gonna be working in the crafts center together, Rex is going to hate us by the end of camp" Anakin answers for the both of you, the lie rolling off his tongue naturally.

"going to? who's to say i don't already" Rex says with a cross of his arms and Anakin rolls his eyes.

"hey what'd i do?" you frown and Rex smiles.

"the first thing you did was compare me to a T-Rex" he defends his prior statement.

"i did no such thing!" you say through a laugh.

he points at you accusingly before saying "like a T-Rex?" in a high-pitched tone mocking you, you can't even take offense because he sounds so unserious.

"i don't sound like that Rex" you snicker only for Anakin to cut in.

"you're right, you sound more like this" he says while pinching his nose to sound nasally and you punch him in the arm. "ow, she hit me!" he says in artificial pain acting like you truly wounded him as he rubs the spot you punched.

"i definitely don't sound like that" you huff and Padme backs you up.

"hmm i'm probably mixing it up with Rex's voice then" he says smugly and Rex kicks him from under the table, judging from the wince he lets out it must have truly hurt unlike your punch.

"no kicking" Ben chastises Rex and Anakin decides no one is safe as he mocks him in a nasally voice too. "oh real mature Anakin" Ben rolls his eyes but there's no real fire behind it as you all poke fun at each other for the rest of dinner.

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"do you have a crush on Anakin?" you whip your head towards Padme blinking rapidly confused and trying to process if you heard her correctly. she didn't repeat herself nor back down.

bold of her to ask that when the man she's talking about is not even five feet away; you had all split up heading in opposite directions towards your respective cabins. "no i don't have a crush on him, why?"

she purses her lips in thought "it seems like he likes you and vice versa" you laugh loud and abrupt, this time she's the one staring at you confused.

"wait you're serious?" you stop in your tracks but she continues walking. well that crushes your hopes of her knowing about his crush and just not reciprocating.

"you'd make a cute couple" she says with a shrug of her shoulders, the absolute irony.

"i just met him today" you say; speeding to catch up with her again. she just smiles and gives you that look she gave you in the log hall again. "i'm serious Padme!" you've grown more defensive than you needed to be.

"so am i" Unbelievable. This wasn't just ironic, it was cruel. you frown and resist the urge to roll your eyes at your own rotten luck.

"i'm too tired for this" half-truth. you were tired, you'd been up all night driving and managed to power through the day without truly resting. however you definitely were not going to be able to get to sleep once you did settle down, instead you'd be replaying every interaction from today in your head.

you did just that after changing into your pajamas and brushing your teeth; groaning softly into your pillow once you finally crashed onto your bed. Padme and Jasmine had their headphones on so you were thankfully in the clear.

the feeling of your phone vibrating next to your head was what pulled you from the self-inflicted torture of your spiraling mind. it took you a few minutes to motivate yourself to even lift your head, which felt ten times heavier than usual. probably due to exhaustion.

'don't tell me you died 😱' you can't help the grin that grows on your lips as you read Honey's message, and then you notice the notification wall of 15 other messages from her. oops. you turn onto your back and open your phone to respond.

'die and leave you alone in life? i would never' you type out quickly before reading through her other messages. 'just landed' followed by 'my parents decided to throw me a surprise party sos' and then a string of updates while the party happened.

most people would think Honey is a pretty social person based on how she is when she's with you, most people would be wrong. Honey has the social battery of a grape. she also requires at least a full day by herself in her room with hot chocolate and a book to recharge properly.

'my love has returned from war 🥹' you giggle not realizing how much you missed her until now and that's when you begin to feel homesick. Honey was your home as corny as that sounded. sisters in another life Platonic soulmates in this one; at least that's what you both always said.

'i've got so much to tell you abouutt' where to even start- i'd be easier to just send a voice message but you didn't feel comfortable enough to venture anywhere on your own yet and find somewhere to update her.

'i'm sat' from the beginning it is then.

you spent the next fifteen minutes just debriefing with her and when you finished she found the Instagram accounts of every person you mentioned.

'oh wow he is cute, no wonder you like him' she says after sending a post from Anakin's account. Ben was in the photo and it looked like it was Anakin's 19th birthday judging by the candles on the cake he was holding.

'i don't like him…' you defend but then remember who you're talking to and add 'yet- besides he likes someone else!!'

'someone who doesn't like him back' she sends back just as quickly and you stick your tongue out at her through the screen even though she can't see it.

'she never specified that, and either way i can't change the fact he likes her' you argue and Honey thankfully lets up.

''would it be weird if i followed Ben's account?' beautiful subject change Honey, you couldn't have done it better yourself.

'Ben really 😏?' you smile as you hit send liking being on the opposite end of the teasing.

'you're right too weird 😔' she replies and you two go back and forth for a while before finally calling it a night.

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the sunlight peeking through from the lack of blinds is what woke you up, but rather than opening up your eyes to start the day you just groaned and turned towards the wall; burrowing your face into your pillow hoping for even just a few more seconds of sleep.

there's a muffled giggle from behind you that reminds you there are two other people in the room with you. poking your head up and turning towards the sound you see Padme staring at you with an amused smile while she brushes her hair back into a ponytail. she gets it on the first try too, unfair. you have to rage quit at least three times before your ponytail is even remotely smooth enough to gaslight yourself into thinking it looks good.

"good news you don't have to be up for another hour" she says while looking at the built-in wall mirror, checking to make sure her hair looks good you guessed.

"well i'm up now" you rasp out and she laughs while you clear your throat, stretching out fully before sitting up and rubbing the crud out of your eyes.

"you're not a morning person are you?" she seems very entertained by the beast you wake up as. Honey once compared you to a bear coming out of hibernation when you woke up the first time you guys had a sleepover, you couldn't deny the accuracy.

"not really…" you trail off while fighting back a yawn. there's a small silence while Padme squirts sunscreen into her hands and begins to apply it on her face and arms. you take the moment to look around the room, Jasmine's bed is empty. evidently, you were the only non morning person here.

"do you want me to walk you to the crafts center?" you hum in thought at Padme's question while you clumsily stumble out of your bed.

"don't we have breakfast first?" you question while pulling out your clothes for the day, including your own Camp Wookiee Shirt.

"yea but it's probably a smart idea to figure out where you'll be heading to afterward" she answers, turning around to give you privacy while you change.

"won't i be able to walk with Rex or Anakin?" you ask, and she shrugs as you zip up your shorts and give her the okay to turn back around.

"Rex probably, Anakin no." you raise a brow and she hands you her sunscreen, before you can refuse her she gives you a look you’d only seen your mom give you when you weren’t listening. you don't bother arguing as she was not going to take no for an answer. "Anakin isn't a morning person either- he never shows up to breakfast. which is probably why he always steals Ben's lunch."

"and Ben lets him?" you snort and Padme nods.

"they grew up together, really close families. he sorta takes care of Anakin like an older brother i suppose." you smile at the thought of a young Ben taking care of an even younger Anakin.

"where's Jasmine gone? i haven't gotten the chance to speak to her at all." Padme doesn't bother to hide her sour expression, guess she trusts you enough now to let her true feelings show or she always did but didn’t want to do anything while Jasmine was in the room.

"Jasmine doesn't talk to anyone, she keeps to herself." you frown, Padme doesn't seem like the type of person to hate someone just because they're a loner- and if she was you didn't wanna be friends with someone like that.

"so what's exactly going on between you two anyway?" you needed to know if this friendship was going to continue.

"it's a long story, but let's just say Jasmine isn't a good person.. like at all and she's a liar who got caught pretty much instantly. and when she got confronted rather than owning up to her actions she got defensive." well now you were even more interested but she wasn't in the mood to get into details. you'd have to ask the boys about it at breakfast if you remembered, provided they didn't sit at the same table as Padme's friends.

"honestly i was shocked to find out she came back this year, i figured they hired you because she left" interesting, whatever she did must have happened just last summer then.

"does no one like her?" you don't mean to keep berating her with questions but couldn't resist the nagging curiosity.

"trust me when i say it'd be more surprising if anyone did like her" what the hell did this girl do to become the social piranha of an entire camp?

you push down the rest of your questions for now, letting there be a peaceful silence as you both exit the cabin.

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you both go on a stroll together before heading to breakfast. Padme took the time to show you around more of the Camp pointing out what each building was and where each path leads, it was still a little confusing but you at the very least wouldn't get lost if you ended up by yourself at some point.

Ben and Rex were sat at the table they initially sat at yesterday. they gave you a wave when you made eye contact and you smiled in return.

"i'm gonna sit with just the boys is that okay?" you ask while turning to Padme who's digging through the bin of fruit snacks looking for the purple pack instead of the blue. you don't blame her everyone knows the purple pack is superior.

"you don't have to run your decisions by me y/n" she teases and you nudge her with your elbow in response. "besides we sleep in the same cabin, you can't get rid of me that easily" she jokes.

"you're right, guess i'm stuck with you for the entirety of camp against my will" this time Padme nudges you causing you both to burst out laughing.

"i'll see you later y/n" she says and gives you a little wave as you split off in separate directions.

"well good morning, i'm surprised you're not tired of us yet" Rex says in greeting as you plop down next to Ben.

"mmm i'd say i'm bordering on just tolerating you guys at most" the banter was instinctive at this point.

"ah i see we're one in the same then" Ben chuckles then takes a big bite of hash. his plate was loaded compared to yours and Rex's, that's a lot considering how much you love to eat. it does however make more sense on why he doesn't seem to care about Anakin stealing his lunch.

"i know we have the rest of the week to ourselves before campers get here, so what exactly are we going to be doing at our jobs if there's no one to perform them for?" you wonder out loud for either of them to answer.

"nothing really, it's just the camp's way of allowing us to hang out and still get paid for it." you give Rex a 'are you serious?' look and he smiles "what? our Camp directors actually like us believe it or not. i'm sure if there were more newbies like you it would be us learning the jobs. but since it's almost always the same people every year this is what it's turned into."

"so this is like a retreat for you guys?" Rex finishes his last bite of food before responding.

"as much of a retreat as you can get with 100 gremlins running around" you nearly choke to death on your food. Ben rubs your back in support as you catch your breath while laughing. note to your future self don't eat around Rex, it's a dangerous game to play.

"drink some water y/n" Ben says in between laughs, him and Rex are both loud enough to garner the attention of the whole lunch room. you're not exactly a shy person but you can't help the heat in your cheeks or the way you slink down hiding your face behind the water bottle you drink out of with just about everyone's eyes on you as they try to decipher what happened.

thankfully it doesn't take long for them to lose interest and carry on in their individual conversations but you still fight the urge to kick both boys for embarrassing you like that.

"i hate both of you" they just smile with matching cheesy grins and you roll your eyes.

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the walk to the crafts center with Rex is just as good bad as you both kept fooling around to see who could make the other laugh harder. it doesn't die down even when you both see Anakin waiting out front of the lodge for you two with his arms crossed and an annoyed face.

Qui-Gon gave Rex the keys to open it because he was the more responsible one, but you had a feeling he'd have given it to you if he knew you a little better.

"what're you two on about?" Anakin grumbles as you both come to a stop in front of him, wiping tears from your eyes and stifling your laughter which only seemed to worsen his mood. he really wasn't a morning person wow.

"Rex just said something funny" you shrug; truth be told nothing you two had said within the last ten minutes made any sense but for some reason that made it all the more hilarious.

Anakin's brows creased and you bite your bottom lip when the urge to reach over and smooth it out with your thumb manifests out of nowhere. it was almost laughable. you let your fingers twitch at your sides instead.

Rex gets the door open with a creak which effectively pulls your attention away from the disgruntled boy in front of you.

the inside was plain, there were multiple picnic benches and some empty corkboards on the walls. you took note of the supply closet in the back and the cleaning supplies that rested beside the door.

"alright Jinn messaged me this morning and said that our only real job for this week is to clean and decorate this place for the campers." you give him a simple nod and walk toward the back of the room.

"does he prefer to be called Jinn or is that only allowed for people he's close with?" Rex takes a minute to consider your question like he'd never really thought about it before. you hand him the broom while you wait.

"i think he prefers Jinn but lets us decide what we're more comfortable with calling him" Anakin answers with a annoyed tone of voice after deciding Rex was taking to long.

"i'm gonna take the mop bucket out back to fill it with water from the hose" he says while turning his baseball cap around. you suddenly feel very warm, and it's not from the heat outside. you swallow before nodding and grabbing the container of Clorox wipes to clean off the dust from the tables.

as soon as Anakin exits the lodge Rex speaks up. "well he's in a pissy mood" you look at him incredulously.

"Padme told me he wasn't a morning person?" your voice is laced with uncertainty now unsure whether to believe that bit of info she'd given you.

"oh he's not, but it's also not usually this bad. then again i shouldn't be too shocked he's more emotional than a hormonal teenage girl" you deadpan at him and he immediately backtracks "not that i'm saying all teenage girls are emotional it's just-" he stops when he sees your lips twitch. "you're pulling my leg aren't you."

you break character instantly and burst out laughing "you should have seen the panic on your face oh my gosh" it's a laugh straight from your core one that makes Rex look like he may just smack you with the broom he's holding.

"okay seriously what am i missing? Rex is not that funny" Anakin huffs when he enters the lodge again, sounding like a pouty little kid who's not getting what they want.

"hey man she made herself laugh, i'm just an innocent victim" Rex defends while sweeping everything that was on the floor into a small pile.

"i was just messing with him" you smile; looking down as you continue the task you started.

"that i can get down with" he says with a smile letting the tension drop from his shoulders as he places the bucket down and goes to grab the mop.

you bite your tongue at the need to question what's going on with him and just finish wiping down each bench. you didn’t feel like you had the right anyway.

the three of you work together to finish cleaning the lodge. the clock on the wall showed it was now 11:00 am and lunch was at 12:00 pm so you had an hour to start working on decorations.

you all plop onto a shared bench and get to work. Anakin made a few star banners while you cut out and tapped a bunch of letters to the wall just below where the cork boards hung, they spelled out 'creativity' and 'imagination'. Rex was apparently the least creative out of the three of you so he was just busied himself with laying out all the crafts supplies so only the extra stuff was in the closet.

"if we finish all of this today, what do we do for the rest of the week?" you ask from the top of the stool you stood on. Anakin was behind you in case you fell while you hung up his banners.

he had offered to be the one to do the hanging but you insisted on being useful to which he replied 'oh yeah because you haven't been already' with the sassiest tone you'd ever heard from a man. to be fair Anakin was proving to be the leader of the sassy man apocalypse so you shouldn't have been shocked.

"we are gonna finish today, and that just means we get to chill for the rest of the week and test out projects for the kids to do" he answers and you see his hands flinch forward when the stool wobbles from you moving onto your tiptoes to get the height right for the banner. it shouldn't make your heart flutter the way it does after all he was quite literally just making sure you didn't bust your ass.

"wow Rex wasn't joking earlier then" you look down at him and there's that furrow in his brows again, it's gone when you blink making you think it was just your mind playing tricks on you.

"wait you didn't believe me?" the question comes from the opposite side of you as Rex seems to spawn out of nowhere. last you checked he was on the complete opposite side of the room organizing the construction paper by color and shade, who'd of guessed he was so particular about stuff like that.

"i was a little busy choking on my food to really process what you said" you rolled your eyes and he snorts nudging your leg with his shoulder which in turn makes the stool wobble and Anakin glare at him.

you ignore the way Rex and him have a wordless conversation and finish taping the last part of the banner.

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the rest of the day went by fast, which wasn't the least bit astonishing. what was however; to both you, Padme and just about every other staff member it seemed was seeing Anakin at Breakfast the next day.

he wasn't eating. he barely even looked conscious, but there he was directly across from Ben and Rex. he was half asleep fully leaning into the palm of his hand, the two boys watching him looked dumbfounded.

"am i hallucinating?" Padme pinches you and you yelp.

"doesn't seem like it" she says while you glare.

"i said hallucinating not dreaming" she throws a small pack of graham crackers at you and you both giggle.

"well if you're hallucinating so am i, and probably everyone else in here" she clapsback and gives you a weird smile that makes you wanna hide, it was like she saw right through you. you didn't think anyone other than Honey and your mom could do that.

"i'll see you later" there's a sparkle in her voice that you choose to ignore, waving goodbye and heading to the table the boys were sat at.

"are you even alive right now?" Anakin blinks awake at your question, rather than responding he scoots closer to you invading your personal space like he'd been doing since you first met the other day.

this boy clearly has something against there being any type of distance between two people when he sits next to them.

"i'd argue he thinks he's dreaming" Ben teases then snickers when he receives a kick under the table. you do your best to hide your confusion and focus on the food in front of you.

"how can you even eat right now?" Anakin mumbles from beside you.

"uhhh because it's 7 in the morning and i'm starving??" he makes a disgusted face that baffles you.

"the idea of eating this early is nauseating" he says through a yawn.

"that's because you're never awake this early" Rex snides. Anakin doesn't defend himself just grumbles incoherently, you think he might of mocked him but it was really hard to tell.

"you're disrupting the natural way of the world Anakin, next we'll find out there was a hurricane in Antarctica" you're about to comment on how that's not scientifically possible but then realize that's exactly why Ben said it.

"haha you're so very funny Kenobi" as much as Anakin was grumpy it was not nearly as bad as the grumpiness he greeted you and Rex with yesterday. not that you didn't believe Rex when he said he wasn't usually that bad but now that you were experiencing it yourself you understood a lot more.

"ooo Kenobi, we're using last names now. you must be pretty upset Skywalker' Ben teases, completely unafraid of the consequences he might have from teasing a sleep-ridden bear.

ah, you're seeing the whole hibernating bear thing now. poor Honey; if you'd known this is what she was dealing with in the morning you'd have started locking yourself in your room till you felt like a decent human being to confront the world.

after the bickering dies down there's a comfortable silence as everyone just enjoys their food, well besides Anakin who's more or less in his own world. it was nice and you let yours eyes travel around the room before landing on your cabin mate who's still not even given you so much as a greeting not to mention was sitting completely and utterly alone. there wasn’t even anyone sitting at the tables near by her.

"what's up with Jasmine?" the question startles the group. probably because to them it was out of nowhere, for you however it's been a burning topic just waiting to be discussed. "i've just noticed she doesn't talk much, and Padme said she lied or whatever but didn't tell me any actual details….i figured you guys might know" you cringe inwardly at yourself when they still don't say anything.

you shouldn't have asked, there was probably a good reason why Padme didn't want to get into details about what happened and now you've just ruined everyone's morning.

your internal monologue of despair was cut short by Rex. "she did some fucked up shit. mostly she spread a bunch of rumors around about people, and she lied about pretty much everything. it's honestly shocking the Directors didn't catch wind of anything." Well that's not good but it can't be that bad?

it very much was that bad. the biggest thing she did was out one of the older campers who felt so uncomfortable they left camp early. that was the turning point when everyone decided to confront her and she got defensive starting her lone wolf act.

Jada was the little girl's name and everyone loved her; she was apparently really sweet with short blonde hair paired with rosy cheeks and a subtle southern accent if you listened close enough.

her parents were super conservative so it's no wonder she'd feel uncomfortable with something like that floating around the camp. especially considering Parent week had been coming up at the time.

she also lied and spread rumors about several of the other girls at camp that were pretty damaging. one of the lesser rumors was about a girl she said was a slut who slept around with all of the guys on camp.

needless to say you understood everyone's opinions on her now, talk about violating on so many levels. how on earth was she still allowed to work here? everyone loved the camp directors and they didn't seem like people who would let something like that slide.

"Padme told me she was shocked that Jasmine even came back this year" you were shocked too now that you knew the extent of what had been done. "but how has no one complained about her directly to the directors?"

"we all sorta came to a unanimous decision to just pretend she doesn't exist." Ben answered while pushing his food around on his plate.

that didn't sit right with you, this is one of those times you speak up not stay silent. "why though?"

"well even though Jinn, Windu and Bail would believe us we'd still have to supply them with evidence for the big guys upstairs….which in turn would mean they'd have to contact everyone involved" he added that last part when he noticed it wasn't clicking in your head. it took a few moments before you let out a quiet oh.

Jada would have to be contacted. which would mean her parents would have to be contacted and since she's a minor they'd have to be told everything. so everyone was staying silent to protect her.

you felt a wave of newfound respect for every single person who worked here as well as a burning hatred for Jasmine. fuck her honestly. there was a long awkward lull in the conversation before it started back up again.

Rex was the one who managed to switch subjects. you ended up on the topic of how Ben and Padme were doing with the zip line course. to no one's surprise Padme was a natural at it, Ben said she got the hang of it after Windu explained it once whereas he had needed a few extra pointers. they also had to do a safety briefing then take a test to make sure they knew everything they would have to for the campers to be allowed on it.

talk about getting off easy on your end, a brief cleaning session followed by decorating a room hardly classified as work compared to what they had to do. not like you'd complain, this just meant you'd be spending the summer doing art. well that and looking after kids, you had a pretty natural affinity with children though so it wasn't a real worry on your end.

Your mom always said it was because you were as childish as them, you preferred carefree and whimsical but a win was a win.

╚═*.·:·.✧ ✦✧.·:·.*═╝

"that looks like shit" Rex is leaning over the table watching Anakin as he weaves bracelet strings together.

"you look like shit but i don't say anything" he quips, very obviously annoyed.

"did you even follow the directions?" Anakin ignores Rex at first but when he builds on the initial question with "because it doesn't look like you did" he gives him a deadly glare.

"i glanced at them and i got the basic idea" Rex looks ready to disagree with him and Anakin looks ready to shove every bead in the bowl next to him down his throat.

you don't say anything, holding your breath so you don't burst out laughing and end up the next target. although it's not like they could say anything about your bracelet as it actually looked like the picture, besides a few color changes.

"well look at yours! what even is that?" Anakin gestures to the bracelet if you could even call it that in Rex's hand, it looked like he hadn't even started.

"it's shit as well but at least i can admit that" He says pointedly and Anakin throws his half-finished attempt of a bracelet at him in response.

you can't hold it in any longer practically bursting into tears from how hard you laugh. both boy's heads snap toward you, Anakin wears a frown and Rex just looks stunned as if he'd forgotten you were there entirely.

"you two are utterly ridiculous" you wheeze and fight back snorting like a pig each time you gasp for air.

it's been like this all week as you guys experimented with different projects to do with the kids, getting to know each other way more in the process. the guys were pretty transparent from the beginning so it wasn't much of a shock when you discovered Anakin was in fact consistently childish and a bit moody but despite that he was extremely loyal and very kind.

he hides most of his real feelings with humor, your guess was he gets awkward when things get too serious so he keeps the mood light. and if that talk a few days ago at breakfast has anything to say it was safe to conclude he also resigns himself from conversations entirely when he's unsure what direction it will go.

Rex was generally a calm person, he could be serious when he needed to but prefers to joke around. which would explain why he always messes with Anakin so much. he's also extremely loyal and although he doesn't verbally express his emotions as much as Anakin does, he wears them all on his face.

Ben was the peacemaker but could be a shit stirrer too. As far as he was concerned Anakin was his brother and he had no problems arguing with anyone who said otherwise. overall the boys were all pretty similar but had their differences, it was nice to be a part of their group.

out of everyone you'd gotten the closest to Padme, sharing a room probably helped with that. but so did the fact you both shared similar interests, and even on the things you disagreed with you both still let the other gush as much as they wanted.

it was a nice little home away from home. you've kept Honey updated about everything any chance you got, but there was only so much you both could share from a distance and you couldn’t help but miss her badly. at the very least you could count on the fact camp would go by fast thanks to how fun it's been so far which meant you'd see Honey just as quickly.

that same thought made you feel a little glum but you never dwelled on it for too long, it was just the beginning after all and Campers would be arriving tomorrow morning.

Camp Wookiee T-shirt visual aid:

tag list: @anakinskwkler @anakinstwinklebunny @divineani

a/n: ITS HERE 🎉🎉🎉 everyone say thank you @munsondjarin who inspired me to write this fic 🤭

i can’t believe how much i actually wrote for just this one part, but it also makes sense considering im essentially just writing out the whole story and splitting it up by beginning, middle and end compared to a bunch of small individual chapters ✨

anyway i hope you all enjoy see you next week for Part 2 💋💋

have a good day Huns Xx <3

[lanaroff]

Unwanted- Part 5

Paring: Wanda Maximoff x Reader

Summary: Y/N is an enhanced SHIELD agent who is forced to work with the Avengers. What happens when they discover that she’s not alone?

A/N: I actually don't know where this series is going. But I have so many ideas. Feels good to be back!

"So how does it work?" Peter asked while he was playing with his fingers looking around.

"How does what works?" You confusingly asked without taking your eyes off the road.

"The thing with the alien, you know V..."He stared saying. However, he was cut by the sound of the breaks stopping abruptly the car.

"Don't" You said sighting. "Don't say it's name when I'm driving. We trained it to come out at the mention of its name. You don't want to see it crashing the car, do you?"

The young boys eyes were full of both wonder and fear. You didn't own him an explanation about why the name should not be mentioned under certain circumstances, but you knew what kind of kid he was, and how talkative he could be.

"Sorry, Miss Y/L/N. I didn't know." He said it with an apologetic look on his face.

The ride back to your apartment was normal. You were aware that he was late for school, and probably would end up in detention for it. But you both agreed to go to your apartment first if he could go on the passenger seat right next to yours.

After a long, long, long trip, where Peter talked about his suit, his friends, his projects, how cool Stark was, and how cool working with the Avengers was, you finally made it out to your apartment. Sure, the trip wasn't thaaat long, but to you it felt like ages.

"Wait here, I'll be right back." You said as you walked inside your apartment.

You enter your office looking for your safe box. You knew that maybe leaving important files was not the best thing, so you were more than in a hurry to find them. Once you stood in front of the box, you entered the password and opened it. As you took your files, you heard steps coming from your living room. Immediately you turn to Venom and prepare yourself in case you needed to kill someone.

However, the moment you stood foot in the other room, a loud sound stunned you, and suddenly the feared creature was no longer in control. Turning yourself back, you dropped to your knees and cried the pain in your head. You were fighting to keep yourself conscious; you couldn't give up. As you were about to stand on your feet, someone pushed you back to the floor.

"You know, we were expecting it to be more difficult. I guess you are just weak." A man that stood in front of you stared saying. "You are a hard fish to catch, let me give you that."

"Go. Fuck. Yourself." You said between groans. Your head was killing you, but your mind was too busy thinking about how to get out of there.

"Oh yeah, I will. After I get paid for delivering you to the boss." He said between laughs.

How did these people knew about Venom's weakness? Only you and some man at SHIELD knew about it, as it was supposed to be confidential information. Only you, Fury, Natasha, Hill, and...

"Rumblow." You said, looking straight into the man's eyes.

As you waited for the main man to give you any kind of confirmation that in deed it was Rumlow behind it, another man came into the room.

"Sir, we found a kid trying to enter the apartment. What do we do with him?" He said as a brunette man followed him with a sacred Peter Parker.

Peter's head was being held by the man's arm, and a gun was being pressed on his skull. You immediately tried to stand on your two feet; however, your body betrayed you, making you fall once again.

"Kill him." He said, as he saw your reaction upon seeing Peter being held. You could let the kid die; otherwise, you were dead. They will never forget you if Peter dies. How would Wanda look at you after realizing that it was your fault?

"NO!" You screamed as you finally pulled your body out of the ground to tackle the man standing in front of you. "PETER RUN NOW!"

And he did as you said. Peter quickly used his strength to pull himself out of the man's arms to run towards you. Immediately you stood up and grabbed Peter so he was behind you.

"Listen to me carefully, Peter. I'm going to need you to run as fast as you can. Did you hear me?" You said it without taking your eyes off the intruders.

"But Miss..."

"No. They can't know what you are capable of doing. Now do what I say and leave. Don't look back; don't come to get me; just run and find Stark." You finished whispering so only he could listen to what you were saying.

The truth was that you knew that Peter could take them down. But if these people wanted to take you to where Rumblow was, then you were more than eager to let yourself be taken.

With a nod that confirmed you that he understood his assignment, Peter ran as fast as he could towards the living room window. Guns were fired at him while you stopped one of Rumblow's men to follow him. As soon as he reached the window, he jumped, and you were once again on the living floor in pain. But relived knowing that he was no longer there.

"You bitch! You are going to regret that" Was the last thing that you heard as you were hit with the back of a gun, leaving you unconscious.

You woke up really hot. And not in the nice way. Your body felt as if you were on fire, as in you were being burned from the inside to the outside. The moment you opened your eyes, you saw yourself chained to a stretcher, and the heat came from right underneath it.

"Rise and shine." You heard a voice saying. Immediately you clench your jaw as you recognize who's voice was.

"You know, you should've told me that you had a sunbed. I would've wore my bikini." You said spitting his face.

"Keep that attitude, and you know how it will end." Romblow said wapping his face.

"I'm counting on it, dumbass." You said with a big smile on your face.

The truth was, you loved it. Not the burning pain that you were feeling. But being so close to Rublow. Knowing that he actually was scared. Because boy, you had all the time in the world, but he? He knew the clock was ticking and that he had a few hours before S.H.I.E.L.D. would know your location.

"I could kill you right here right now." The man in front of you said grabing you by the hair.

"I know, but she won't allow you, will she? You are scared of her, I can see it." You replied.

"You are right. But that's the thing. I'm not going to kill you. Nah!" He said as he walked next to a table full of surgical instruments. "I'm going to destroy every hope you have of taking down Hydra." He grabbed a scalpel with one hand and, with the other, grabbed the back of your head. "I'm going to kill your new friends, so you have no one." He said while pressing the blade down your head hard enough to make you bleed but not enough to cut you too deep. "And after that, I'm going to free it, and then they will see you as their threat. And when you realize that you are alone and hopeless, then I will take you to HER. She can't wait to see you and continue with the work she started. You will be all hers!"

"Fuck you!" Was all you dared to say. You couldn't go back to her. You had come so far to be back at that place. Sure, you hated S.H.I.E.L.D. and the Avangers, but deep down you knew that they were the only path to revenge. You needed them; you needed Venom. And he knew it.

"Bring Dr. Ackermann. Now!" Romblow said to one of his soldiers.

Back at the compound, the things were not better. Peter had come burst through the door screaming for help, alarming the whole team.

"Hey kid, slow down, what happened?" Tony asked him.

"It's... um... It's miss Y/L/N... We were at her place, and some guys came over, and they... um, they took her. She is gone." He said

The team shared the same worrying expression. You were supposed to take Peter to school; how could something like that happen? But most important, who would do something like that?

"What do you mean she is gone Peter?" Natasha asked.

"They had this device that was emitting some sound that hurt her. And she couldn't move. She asked me to come to you guys. We need to help her." Peter said. Upon hearing what Peter said, Natasha sent him with Bruce to the medbay to see if he had any injuries.

"You know something, don't you?" Wanda asked the spy. She knew something bad had happened. Maybe something related to your hatred thowars Hydra? She didn't know. All she knew was that she had to help you, just like you did with her.

"Y/N has a bomb in her head." Natasha said. The team were left speechless. Wanda couldn't comprehend why. Why would you have that on you? You were not a bad person; she was sure of that. You just needed someone to take care of you. Why would someone put that device on your head?

"What do you mean?" Tony asked.

"When S.H.I.E.L.D. got their hands on Y/N, she was unstable. She couldn't control Venom, in fact, it controlled her. So Fury decided that the best thing to do was to build a device that could control Venom, since she couldn't do it. It turns out that loud sounds and fire are one of it's weaknesses. They built a device that emits piercing sounds straight to her brain." Natasha explained.

Inmediatly, Wanda understood the events of the first night that she encountered the alien. That ringing noise that she heard, the way you twisted in pain, how Venom froze. You were just trying to protect her, and in doing so, you were hurting yourself.

"Okay, and what does this have to do with the bomb?" Bucky asked.

"One time while we were training, she lost control of her body to Venom. It was a disaster; four agents died that day. Venom just tear them apart. So she asked Fury to put a bomb in her head, so if she ever loses control again, she will eliminate Venom before it harms anyone."

"And by that, you mean that'she will eliminate herself'?". Sam asked. As soon as those words left Sam's mouth, Wanda had to leave the room. She just felt like it was too much for her. She felt nauseous.

She had to get out of there.

Wanda run to your room. It was the first time since the incident that she actually got to see it. It was almost empty. There was nothing that really reminded her of you. And that showed her how little she knew you. When she first came to the Avengers Towel, she felt lost. She had just lost Pietro, and she was all alone. Like you. You both had lost so much. She was determined to help you. She wanted to help you. Who knows, maybe one day you two could grow up and be friends, she thought. All she knew was that she couldn't leave you like that.

She came back to where she had left her teamates with another set of thoughts. "What's the plan?" Wanda said.

"I just talked to Fury; he has her location. She has a tracker, just in case something like this happens" Natasha said.

"Alright team, suit up." Said Steve.

[tiredfox64]

Can I ask request a Kuai Liang x reader on the reader also being a pyromancer but always kept it a secret and Kaui Liang finds out about the reader's ability and tries to help teach only for the reader to avoid him out of fear of either being made fun of or accidentally hurting him until Kuai Liang shows his ability to prove the reader otherwise?

A Lighter to a Bonfire

Yip notes: Goodness, I need to show him more love. I was out here working to get dragon crystals to buy him more clothes and I barely make fics for him.

Pairing: Kuai Liang (MK1) x Gn reader

Warnings‼️: FUEGO FUEGO FIRE FIRE

At the young age of five, you discovered something that you thought was a curse. It all started from an incident where your emotions were out of control, resulting in you bursting into a ball of flames. Your parents were horrified. They didn’t know what happened and neither did you. They thought this was an instance of human combustion but you were fine. No burn or scar left behind. That’s not right.

Through research, you found out that there was a long history of pyromancers in your family. It looks like it went on for years before diminishing by the 1900s. Fewer children were being taught how to control their abilities until the practice died out. That was until you had your incident. Looks like it jumped some generations.

Unfortunately, nobody in your family knew how to help. They tried their best to get rid of it but it was no use. Blessings, cleansings, healing, and even chicken blood could not rid you of your destiny. All you could do was adapt. For you, adapting meant staying away from people.

You rarely had friends out of fear of hurting them. You distanced yourself from your family which saddened them. You had to focus on keeping yourself calm to prevent any incidents. You would hate to burn anything, especially if it was something of yours. Some days you would wonder why it had to be you. You cried from the despair of being alone. It was a sacrifice you had to make to keep everyone safe. No one could have helped you.

Or so you thought.

On a random day, you were visited by a man with glowing eyes who said he was the protector of Earthrealm and the god of fire. His name was Liu Kang and for once you felt hope. You thought that god himself would help get rid of this stupid curse. That wasn’t what he came for. Instead, he said he wanted to train you and help you control your pyromancy abilities, just like he helped your ancestors. He informed you that he would bring you to someone who could be of great assistance.  

Though you couldn’t get rid of this ability at least you could learn to control it. You could live a better life now. You can have friends and your family near you without worrying about them getting hurt. You were on board with this. Liu Kang was pleased to see your enthusiasm and said he would bring you to the Shirai Ryu to gain assistance.

This was truly a new beginning for you.

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

There was a spark the moment you met Kuai Liang. Liu Kang never mentioned that he was so handsome. And he was the grandmaster? You’re gonna be assisted by the grandmaster? This was exciting.

Kuai Liang was intrigued by you. All Liu Kang told him was that you were in need of assistance. You needed training and guidance on how to keep your emotions steady. It was important that you didn’t condense your emotions but instead balance them. Kuai Liang initially thought you were some rogue person who had no other purpose in life because Liu Kang didn’t say anything. He didn’t tell him that you were a pyromancer and you were never told that Kuai Liang was one as well. A pretty good one actually.

Maybe it was god playing a practical joke on you. Maybe it was god wanting to let time tell what would happen between you and Kuai Liang. There is really no real reason why Liu Kang didn’t tell you two that you’re both pyromancers. He just wants to play matchmaker.

Kuai Liang found it best to meditate as it’s a great way to stabilize yourself. It quiets the mind and calms your breathing. Plus, it’s an excuse for Kuai Liang to step away from the stress of building a new clan. If he has to deal with another incompetent initiate or losing track of Bi-Han he’s gonna combust and never extinguish.

Your time with Kuai Liang was peaceful. It wasn’t easy in the beginning. You were afraid of being too hopeful and wasting your breath on something that was doomed to fail. You feared that the moment you thought you had control over yourself you would accidentally burn everything around you. Your mind ran wild with these negative thoughts. They’d make your skin all clammy and your chest would burn with the flames that flowed through your veins. Then Kuai Liang would tell you to breathe. Hold it for five seconds then let it out just as slowly. There, don’t you feel better?

Kuai Liang had a lot of patience when it came to you which was almost shocking. He always seemed to be in a rush when it came to everything else. He needed the initiates to better themselves fast. He was in a rush to catch Bi-Han and prevent him from causing any harm to the realms. With you, he acted like he had all the time in the world. You weren’t sure if it was because Liu Kang told him he had to be cautious or if Kuai Liang was doing it out of kindness.

The real answer is that Kuai Liang feels like there is something special about you. He didn’t know what it was but he had a gut feeling you and him weren’t all that different.

You had a feeling too but not the same one he did. He was suspicious, you were straight-up feeling. Who could blame you? You spent most of your life cooped up in an effort to prevent yourself from hurting others. You meet a handsome man who shows you respect and doesn’t fear you in the slightest. Even some of your family feared you for your explosive tendencies. But him, oh no, he looked at you like you were a person and not a ticking bomb. It’s reasonable that you would find comfort in him. Maybe a little bit of affection too.

That’s what makes you scared. You assumed that Kuai Liang doesn’t know you’re a pyromancer since he never brought it up or taught you how to control it. You were afraid to burn the bond you were starting to create with him.

At this point, you two weren’t just meditating together. You would take walks together which were soothing. You two would have conversations while having tea, sometimes inviting Tomas to join. You’d laugh, smile, sulk, and cry, all in front of Kuai Liang. He made you feel wonderful and to hurt him by accident would kill you. You wouldn’t hurt him on purpose of course but the flames that run through you wouldn’t hesitate to burn his skin.

So you try to keep yourself composed, even fearing good emotions would make you flare up. Good or bad it doesn’t matter; any strong emotions could set you ablaze. You know that because you accidentally used your powers while you two meditated.

You just wanted to take a quick peek at Kuai Liang, one wouldn’t hurt. You opened one eye and looked over at Kuai Liang who was kneeling next to you. His face looked peaceful with the way his eyes were closed. You looked down at his chest and saw how it slightly moved with each breath he took in and let out. Don’t forget to take a look at those muscles. You couldn’t help but smile softly at the gorgeous man beside you and feel grateful for what he’s done. Then you felt it. You felt that burning, tingly feeling that spreads across your skin when your powers start acting up. You looked down to see the palms of your hands were on fire like two little bonfires. You gasped without thinking and closed your hands tightly. The flame extinguished for now. It would come back if that feeling in your chest kept swirled. You closed your eyes, not noticing Kuai Liang looking at you, and went back to meditating. You focused on getting rid of that warm feeling in your chest.

He noticed, of course. He saw the black smoke that arose from your hands. The dark color of that smoke could only come from fire. It clicked in his head and that gut feeling made sense. You were a pyromancer, just like him. He didn’t know what to feel. He felt kind of hurt that you hid this from him. It would be unfair to hold this fact against you since Liu Kang didn’t disclose it to him. Then he started to wonder if that was the true reason you needed assistance. It would explain why Liu Kang brought you here instead of the Wu Shi to help with your emotions.

He gets it now but he won’t say anything yet. If it is true, he doesn’t want to disturb your peace. It’s best to finish the meditation session and then confront you.

After you both were done, Kuai Liang was about to ask you something you got up and walked swiftly out of the room. You didn’t give him time to get back on his feet. You held your head low as you slipped into your temporary room. Just like that, it was like how you used to live. Cooped up and too afraid to be near people.

Kuai Liang got up and started walking down the halls. He guessed you would run back into your room. He was there in under a minute and was knocking at your door.

“…yes?” You called back.

“You ran out of the room pretty quickly. Is something wrong?” He asked.

You could tell he knew something was wrong by the tone of his voice. You debated with yourself if telling him the truth would do any good. It’s not that easy to explain you can produce fire.

“I’m just tired. I’ll be fine in a few hours. Don’t worry about me.” You were trying your best to get him to leave you be.

He sighed at your dismissive attitude but what could he expect? You were hiding this for a long time, you clearly don’t want anyone to know. It would be unwise to leave this issue untouched that’s why he needs to discuss this with you. From the looks of it, he could easily mistake you for someone who just discovered their abilities. He has no clue that you have been dealing with this all your life.

“Okay. Be sure to come out for dinner. I want to talk to you once dinner is finished.” And with that, he finally left.

You were left a nervous wreck in your room. You thought all your progress was reversed and you were back to square one. You knew it, you knew this would happen. The moment you got close to someone you started burning up. You flopped face-first onto your bed and groaned out loud. Things are just never easy for you.

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

Great, now Kuai Liang was struggling to catch you.

After he said he wanted to speak with you his mind immediately started working on a plan for you. He wanted you to figure out how to be a pyromancer and he would train you like he was trained. After that, you definitely won’t feel the need to hide your powers.

But you never came. After dinner, you went right back into your room. He came knocking at your door and you ignored him by pretending to be asleep. No matter, he’ll just catch you tomorrow.

…yeah no.

Kuai Liang wasn’t going to force you out of the room. He wants to keep you calm since you were unable to control your abilities. It was frustrating to him that he had no other way to get you out. He tried talking to you through the door but you would either stay quiet or give him short answers.

“I only want to help you.” He yelled through the door.

“I’m fine.”

“I know you need help with your pyroman-“

“I have no idea what you are talking about!”

You’d deny having any pyromancy abilities. You didn’t want him to help you out of fear that he would get hurt. He’d sigh before leaving you alone.

He hates to do this to you but he might have to catch you off guard. You can’t stay cooped up in your room all day. You eventually have to eat. He knows you’ve been sneaking out just to nibble on some snack when you think no one is looking. He knows you’re stuffing your cheeks with tangerines, don’t lie. Nobody eats ten tangerines in one sitting except you.

All he can do is wait for now.

The sun had set and the moon began to rise. All was quiet with the occasional cricket chirping. Right on schedule you were creeping out of your room quietly. You did manage to control your fire a little. You were using your finger as a candle to guide your way around. You were in the kitchen area in under a minute. You grabbed those tangerines like you’ve been starving for days. The lights suddenly flicked on. In your most vulnerable state, you were caught with a bunch of tangerines in your arms and your finger lit. Who was the person who caught you in the act? Why it was the Shirai Ryu’s grandmaster, Kuai Liang.

You curled your finger up and extinguished it by closing your hands. You slowly put the tangerines back like that was the problem here.

“I knew you had pyromancy abilities. Why did you hide it?” He asked.

“I don’t know. I don’t know what you are talking about.”

“Your finger was on fire.” He replied bluntly.

“Just leave this alone please.” You begged.

“I will not. You have to let me help you. I can teach you to control it. Controlling it involves your emotions being stable, yes, but it also involves physical control. You have to control where it goes.”

“No!” You blurted out.

You surprised Kuai Liang. This was the first time you ever raised your voice. It was also nighttime and the deafening silence was interrupted by your plead. You immediately felt bad and decided to tell him the truth. It’s the least you could do.

“I don’t want you to help me because…I don’t want to hurt you. I’m scared of hurting others. That’s why I’ve hidden it all my life. I really like you and I don’t want to end up hurting you because I struggle to keep emotions under control.”

At that moment the skin on your arms began to tingle and your hands started to produce embers. You looked at Kuai Liang who was calm. Even as your hands started to catch fire he didn’t bat an eye. Instead, he walked closer even though you pleaded with him to stay away from you. You backed away from him until your back hit the kitchen counter. You thought you would cry because you were so frustrated with yourself. You were upset with how your life had turned out and now the one good thing you had was about to be ruined. That’s what you thought before Kuai Liang took hold of your wrist and placed his other hand next to yours. You watched as his hand caught fire. It was hotter and brighter than the fire you produced. Little embers from both your hands danced in the air before dying out. You stared in awe at the sight before you.

Kuai Liang was a pyromancer, duh.

“Oh…” The realization was setting in.

“As I said before, I can help you.”

He folded his hand over yours, extinguishing both your flames. He held your hand in his, squeezing it to make sure you got the point that this was real.

“I had absolutely no idea.”

“Now you know. I hope this will help prevent you from running away from me next time.”

Your eyes shifted down in shame. This could have been figured out sooner if you weren’t so afraid. Kuai Liang doesn’t blame you luckily. You thought you were alone in this world. You clearly aren’t.

“I’m sorry.” You apologized.

“I accept your apology. Now that you know I can properly teach you how to control yourself. Soon, you will be a greater pyromancer than me.”

“I don’t think so. I think I’m pretty late with this.” You joked.

“It is never too late. Get some rest. In the morning I will start training you.” Kuai Liang slowly let go of your hand, also hesitant to do so.

It felt like a weight was lifted from your shoulders. You had nothing to fear in the end. You were just being silly at this point. But things will be different now. You have a real chance to get a hold of your life and be better than ever. Maybe you will be just as great as Kuai Liang.

Oh all of this is so exciting you just might—

Fwoosh

Oops, you caught fire again.

Kuai Liang ran back to you and took hold of your hand. You calmed down and the fire that surrounded your body died down. You actually startled Kuai Liang with that.

“Perhaps you should stay in my room for tonight. I need to keep an eye on you.”

Yap notes: Kuai Liang and Guatemala have failed me on the same day. What kind of cruel joke is this. I promise I'm not mad what are you talking about? Also sorry if the first part seems to be different than the second. I started it, wasn’t feeling, and came back to it way later. Yes I did started craving tangerines hella bad how could I not—🍊🦊HEY! HEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING BACK IN MY DEN?! PAY YOUR RENT! Adiós!

[pitchsidestories]

searching for hope II Lucy Bronze x Reader

masterlist I word count: 3426

a/n: hi, it's inspired by this request here, we hope you like it despite the heavy topic.

warnings: career ending injury, sadness, but with a fluffy ending

Suddenly, the whole Estadi Johan Cruyff fell silent when they heard your scream echoing against the walls of the Barca femeni’s home. Everyone who saw you sink to the ground after a bad tackle from your opponent turned pale.

Yes, the tackle from the other player was bad, but what was more unnerving in their eyes was the way you hold on to your knee. This was always a bad sign and something people who followed women’s football grew all too familiar with over the past years. It sends a shiver down the spine of the home fans and your beloved teammates.

It has been an ordinary league game so far, it wasn’t an important one, your team was already leading with three goals and yet you found yourself laying on the pitch. The pain your body was in felt almost unbearable.

“Hey! Don’t move!”, Lucy yelled, looking deeply worried at you while she knelt beside you, taking a hand of yours in hers. Your girlfriend normally tried to keep your relationship as private as possible, but her concern for you threw the normal behaviour out of the window.

“Lucy?”, you mumbled, the tears streaming down your face made your vision turn blurry, but you would always recognize your lover’s voice.

“They’re getting the stretcher.”, Lucy informed you calmy, from the outside the English woman might still look like her professional, tough self, but inside she was falling apart. Seeing you in this state of agony broke her heart.

“Lucy, you need to let her go, the medics are taking care of her now.”, Alexia smiled empathetically at the older player.

“I’ll come and check on you later, okay?”, your girlfriend whispered into your ear before releasing her protective grip from you with a heavy heart.

Instead of speaking you just nodded, signalizing that you heard her, as the medical staff was taking you off the pitch. Even though you closed your eyes you could feel Lucys gaze lingering on you until you were inside the ambulance. The sound of clapping hands from your team and the fans warmed your heart.

“That was bad. She was white as a ghost.”, the defender whispered, the shock of your terrible injury was written all over her.

“Don’t think about it right now, focus on the game, Lucy.”, Keira responded.

“I’m focused.”, Lucy shrugged it off.

Looking at the time, she added:” It’s only ten more minutes anyway.”

Turned out, these were the longest ten minutes in her whole career.

She never felt more relieved when the referee blew the final whistle. As fast as the English woman could she packed her things to travel to your hospital bed.

“Hey, how are you?”, Lucy asked you still out of breath.

“It hurts so much, Lucy.”, you replied in an honest tone, you hated how you sounded, so weak, normally you were known to be a woman who could handle her pain.

“I know. But it will get better.“, Lucy promised as she sat down on the side of your bed.

Tears welled up in your eyes as you shook your head: “No, they said it might end my career…“

Lucy shook her head determinedly: “They can’t know that yet! We don’t even know what it is!“

“It’s my knee.“, you said, your voice choked with tears. You took a deep breath to gather yourself before you added: “Isn’t it weird? We already worried about your knee and here we are…“

If you were not as overwhelmed with the situation, you might have laughed about the irony. You girlfriends knee had been troubling her for some time now so you had prepared for the event that she would have to retire.

What you had failed to include in your plans was the fact that injuries could happen at any time and football careers could be cut short by them.

“We’re not at the point for this conversation yet.“, Lucy replied with stubborn hopefulness.

You sighed: “I know… but I have a bad feeling…“

Lucy took your hand in hers, squeezing encouragingly: “That doesn’t have to mean anything.“

It took days of different tests and scans until you finally had your diagnosis. You had been able to tell what would follow from the look on the doctors face before he even said a word.

It got too real too fast. You were suddenly faced with the fact that your life would never be the same again, the dream that you had spend years working so hard for turned to ash right in front of you on a random Tuesday afternoon.

“Luce, could you please leave me alone for a moment?“, you begged. There were no tears yet, just emptiness.

Your girlfriend rubbed circles on your healthy knee with her thumb: “Y/n, please…“

“We just got told that I can never play again. Go!“, you shouted at her.

Lucy only frowned at you: “We can find another doctor. There’s always a way.“

“Not right now. Leave!“, you instructed her once more, this time as collected as you were capable of.

Reluctantly she got up and left the room without another word.

Only then your tears began to fall and realization set in.

Outside of your hospital room, your teammates were impatiently waiting for any news.

“What did the doctor say, Lucy?“, Mapi asked as soon as English defender stepped out. The heads of the other players snapped up immediately.

Lucy looked at Fridolina, Aitana, Ingrid and Alexia and shook her head. “He pretty much told her that her career is over. She didn’t even have the surgery yet!“

Ingrid blinked down at the bouquet of lilies in her hands, her lip trembling: “And all we got her are her favourite flowers…“

“She’ll still appreciate them.”, your girlfriend reassured her with a sad smile on her lips.

“Yes, but we didn’t thought this could be a career ending injury-“, the team captain explained, but even she was at a loss for words, nothing what the midfielder could say felt appropriate, you weren’t that old yet, and the thought of you never playing for Barca Femeni again was terrible to her.

Alexia could feel a lump in her throat as she was thinking about you, normally you’d have so many years left in the beautiful game.

“Her scream will haunt me in my dreams, it was awful.”, Fridolina confessed, biting her lip.

“This will be a hard time for her.”, Aitana whispered, visibly moved by the news about your injury as the Swede hugged her.

“As well as for Lucia.”, Mapi predicted.

“I’m fine.”, Lucy tried to comfort her teammates with her reply.

“No, we’re here for you both.”, Alexia clarified.

Your teammates stayed true to their words, whenever one of you had a bad day, they made sure that someone was there for you or Lucy.

A day before the surgery your girlfriend made sure she was at home. The defender and you were laying on the sofa, her strong arms were wrapped around you, making you feel very safe and comforted despite the rising nervousness.

“Are you ready for it, love?”, Lucy asked you attentively.

“I am ready.”, you nodded, while she was running a hand through your open hair which you knew she loved a lot.

“Maybe things will change once it’s healed.”, the older woman thought out loud, her voice full of optimism.

“Yes, maybe. But you know what we need right now?”, you changed the subject to something more light-hearted.

Smiling your girlfriend watched you while you were making two cappuccinos for both of you, with a sprinkle of hot chocolate powder on top of it. The delicious scent filled your whole living room, mirroring the peaceful atmosphere of this afternoon.

“Did you perfect your latte art while I was in training.”, Lucy rose an eyebrow in amusement.

“Possible. Narla loved it because she got a lot of milk foam in the process.”, you winked at her laughing, as the dark-haired player took a few sips from the hot drink, closing her eyes with relish.

“At least it had something positive for one of us.”, the defender smirked, meanwhile the West Highland Terrier has been taking your place, so she received her daily dose of cuddles. You could never get tired of the sight of these two, which had a huge place in your heart.  

“And you got a delicious cup of coffee at the end too.”, you reminded her. More serious you added:” Missed me at training?”

“Yeah. Everyone’s asking how you are.”, Lucy cleared her throat.

“I miss them too.“, you admitted. “They’re more than teammates, you know?“

Your girlfriend nodded slowly, in quiet understanding: “I know.“

“Of course you do. Sorry.“ Your gaze shifted towards the contents of your cup.

Lucys hand appeared on your healthy knee, rubbing light circles with her thumb. “No, I appreciate them for their support.“

You looked back and managed a slight smile: “Me too, them and you.“

The defender shrugged casually: “That’s the least thing I can do for you.“

Before you could assure her that she already did more than necessary, Narla jumped on your lap and started to lick your face.

Giggling, you pulled back: “Oh, apologies, Narla. You’re doing a great job too.“

You rewarded the little dog with some pets while Lucy laughed: “Don’t forget your biggest supporter.“

“Never,“

“I’m sure she will take good care of you after the surgery.“, Lucy joked.

You pushed any thought about the surgery away. For now, you just wanted to enjoy the calm afternoon with your two favourites.

You did not remember much about your surgery day until you woke up from anaesthesia. You were confused and tired and you heard people talking all around you. It took you a while to recognize the familiar voices.

“Luce, it’s going to be alright.“ That was Mariona.

“I can only hope so.“, you heard your girlfriend say, her voice was full of worry.

“She’s a fighter.“, Mapis voice promised in the darkness.

“She is.“

“See?“

You finally found the energy to open your eyes. Your teammates all stared back at you. Slowly blinking, you had to clear your throat. It felt disgustingly dry.

“Girls? Hi…“, you managed to say hoarsely.

Mapi smiled: “Hi.“

“Love, you’ve done it.“ Lucy carefully took your hand in hers, studying your face closely.

You frowned: “I didn’t do anything.“

“Yes, you did.“, Lucy remained stubborn.

“The doctors were working.“

You were too tired for an argument so you were grateful when Ingrid changed the subject: “How do you feel? Are you thirsty? We got water and some snacks for you.“

“I’m okay. Water sounds great right now…“, you replied truthfully and were immediately handed a glass of water by the Norwegian.

“Here you go.“

You took a sip. Your throat already felt so much better. “Thanks, Ingrid.“

“You’re welcome.“

“They didn’t say anything, right? If the surgery went well and stuff?“, Lucy interrupted. You just blinked at your girlfriend in confusion. Hadn't she just been watching you wake up?

“I’ve not spoken to them yet…“, you replied.

“That’s okay. I can do that for you. You need to rest now.“

It was only when your teammates had left and you had time to recover why Lucy was so nervous about the outcome of the surgery.

But both of your hopes were crushed several hours later in the same hospital room by a stern looking doctor. He confirmed that the recovery process would be hard and your injury would very likely end your professional career.

“Love?”, Lucy started gently.

“Yes?”, you looked up, still too shocked by the recent confirmation.

“Maybe we should let a second doctor check your knee.”, she suggested cautiously.

“Okay.”, you agreed, too exhausted to say anything more than that, while the defender kissed your hand lightly.

“Maybe there’s still a chance.”, your girlfriend more optimistically than she actually felt. But Lucy wanted to be strong for you even though the news saddened her almost as much as you.

It was after the third time you tried another doctor who was only repeating the diagnosis you heart right from the start that you exploded in front of her:” I had enough, Lucy. No more doctor visits because of it, I can’t do this anymore.”

You could see the shock on the English woman’s face. It was so unlike you to go after her like this.

“Maybe there is one out there that can fix your knee.”, your girlfriend mumbled, still too stunned about the way you reacted.

“Are you even listening to me?”, you yelled frustrated at her unshaken optimism despite the bad news.

“I am. But I’m not ready for you to end your career yet.”, Lucy declared stubbornly.

Her belief was something which ignited a little spark of hope inside you. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have said what you did next:” The recovery just begun, so maybe we should take it one step at a time.”

“Okay, fine.”, the defender agreed.

But rehab turned out to be physically and mentally tough for you and the people who loved you. On an especially hard day in the gym, you begged Mapi who was there as well to not call Lucy to pick you up. Simply because your girlfriend was already doing so much for you in everyday life.

“Why not? She can just pick you up.”, the Spaniard shrugged.

“No, she can’t see me like this.”, you frantically shook your head.

The face of your teammate softened. She paused for a moment before asking you.

“Do you really think she cares?”

“All she cares about is my comeback, Mapi. What if the doctors are right, do you think Luce would break up?”, it suddenly broke out of you, the fears which had a hold on you since the recovery started, were put into words for the first time. Before they only lived in your head.

“No. There’s no way.”, Mapi promptly answered without a second thought.

“Like whom am I when this ends?”, you continued, a sad smile appeared on your lips.

The defender stroke your back empathetically: “You’re still you. You’re more than a football player. Always remember that.”

The darkness you had felt earlier was feeling a little lighter through the kind words of your friend. It was like there was a light at the end of the tunnel, you could almost reach it with your hand.

You gently placed your hand on Mapis thigh and forced yourself to look at her: “We need to meet up for a coffee soon. I need to see something else than the gym…“

“Tell me when and where.“, your teammate replied, giving you an encouraging smile.

“I’ll.“, you said with genuine anticipation.

Excitedly, Mapi suggested: “I can bring Ingrid.“

“Sounds great.“

“We’re happy to distract you.“

You just smiled at the defender. Even though this phase of your life was not the easiest, the love and compassion you got from your teammates made it bearable.

When you got home, Lucy was already waiting for you impatiently. The expression on her face already told you everything, you needed to know. You suppressed a sigh.

“Mapi told me what you said to her earlier…“, Lucy began.

“Did she?“ It was more a statement than a question.

“Yes.“

“We were just talking.“, you tried your best to calm Lucys worries.

“You should have asked me to pick you up.“, Lucy insisted, anger mixing into her voice.

You had no energy to fight now. “It was fine. You already do so much, I don’t want to be a burden to you.“

Your girlfriend rolled her eyes: “Oh, please.“

“What?“

“Stop being like that. You know I want to help you.“

“I just told you that you’re already helping!“ You sighed with annoyance.

Lucys voice went quieter as she said: “Not in the important moments…“

“Luce…“ You bridged the gap between the two of you, unsure of what to do next.

“Just call me next time.“

“I’ll.“, you promised.

“Thanks.“

Carefully, you wrapped your arms around Lucy. She leaned into the hug, the crease between her eyebrows softening. You locked eyes with her: “I love you.“

Lucys lips moved in an attempt to reply but she was interrupted by a high-pitched whimper.

You both looked down to see Narla sitting at your feet.

“And you too of course, Narla.“, you laughed.

Lucys features finally relaxed: “Let me make you some dinner. Maybe that can save your day.“

“Yours definitely does.“, you grinned, only then realizing how hungry you were.

With a wink, your girlfriend pulled out of the hug: “I’ll make your fav.“

“Thank you.“ You kissed her cheek, full of gratefulness.

As promised, you met Mapi and Ingrid at a small café the next morning. You were chatting about your recovery and the latest team news. Ingrid was in the middle of explaining how Martas shoes had disappeared from the changing room when Mapi took a sip of coffee and started coughing.

Ingrid looked at her girlfriend in concern, stopping herself mid-setence.

“Oh my god. That coffee is awful, y/n. The one you make is so much better.“, Mapi grimaced.

“Mapi, be quiet!“, Ingrid told her girlfriend quickly. She looked around the café sheepishly in hopes that no one had heard her girlfriend slandering their coffee.

Mapi shrugged: “But it’s true.“

“Uhm thanks, I guess?”, you replied smiling amused at the Spaniards dramatics.

“She’s not wrong to be honest.”, the Norwegian admitted blushing.

“Actually, I’ve always dreamed about opening my own café, someday where Lucy could have her bar alongside.”, you confessed, your eyes looked dreamily at no one in particular.

Behind them you were daydreaming about it, you could see the welcoming, modern space, the coffee machine which everyone would spot at first sight when they entered the café, with cute different coffee cups, waiting to be filled. In the day it would serve all kinds of hot and iced drinks while in the evening your girlfriend would serve drinks.

“Oh my god, you should!”, Mapi clapped her hands excitedly. The defender was your ultimate hype woman since the injury.

“Yes, we’d never go anywhere else.”, Ingrid added grinning.

“Please! Everyone can be a coach or a pundit after retirement.”, her girlfriend basically begged you.

“I’ll think about it, okay?”, you asked them.

“Okay.”, the older woman nodded.

Step by step your daydream turned into reality over the upcoming months. As your body recovered from the big injury, the café came slowly together too. While your physical and mental wounds started to heal you felt more comfortable each day in your new role as former football player and current small business owner.

Obviously, it still hurt a little when you saw your girlfriend and teammates play, but on your private opening celebration with them you felt an inner calmness about it. You were ready for your next chapter which was still unwritten.

“Are you ready for your first customers?”, Lucy’s question took you back to the present.

“I’m ready.”, you answered, a nervous smile flitted across your face.

She pressed an encouraging kiss on your cheek, before remarking:” There they are.”

“Hi, come on in, girls.”, you waved at the entering guests cheerfully.

“Hi, this turned out so cute girls.”, Mapi noted with approval while taking everything in.

“Yes, this is so you, I love it.”, Ingrid marvelled at her surroundings.

“Thank you, I assume that you guys want two flat whites?”, hearing them praise your new project made your face lit up.

“Don’t you worry, later we’ll have some drinks to celebrate the opening properly.”, Lucy told her teammates with a cocky smile on her lips.

“We’ll stay for both. Coffee and drinks.”, the Spaniard responded happily.

“Perfect.”, you were just starting to make their coffees as slowly but surely the rest of your team was getting inside the café.

They tried to show you that their support didn’t stop because your football career has been cut short, it was still there and today you could feel it especially.

Late at night, your girlfriend and you had done the cleaning of the mess the celebration had caused. In the background slow music was playing and Lucy danced with you in the dim lit room, whispering into your ear:” I love this little life we created together.”

So did you, you searched for hope after the injury and you found it in the encouraging smiles of your friends and right here in the arms of the defender who you loved a little bit more with every passing day.

[bubblegumfanfictions]

Perfect to Me |Astarion x Fem!Plus-sized! Reader|

Fandom- Baldurs Gate 3

Ship- Astarion/Fem!Plus-sized! Reader

Warning(s)- fatphobia, negative thoughts about weight, mentions of Cazador, Swearing

Summary- Reader is upset after a rough day in Baldurs Gate, but Astarion proves that she doesn't need to be.

Word Count- 1,700

A/N- Sorry if this isn't perfect, it has been a while. But merry Christmas and Happy Holidays everyone! (I also changed the name of the fic)

After a long and perilous journey through the Shadow Cursed Lands, The Underdark, and the Mountain Pass to gain allies you finally made your way to Baldurs Gate. The bustling streets and lively atmosphere was almost alien to you after so much time surrounded by nature.

The faces of your companions tell you all you need to know about how they feel at present. Disgust, Excitement, and Fear. You felt for Astarion, it must be terrifying returning to your old hunting grounds after so long, seeing the families of people he had condemned, but that wasn’t who he was now. You felt a fleeting sense of pride that your friend had promised the Gur he would help take down Cazador and find out what happened to their children– Whether they were alive or not is a whole different story.

Karlach on the other hand looked positively elated at being here. Her excitement was certainly infectious, You pause your thoughts and look over at the disgust on Lae’zel’s face, Well maybe not totally infectious. Although you did take note of a glint in Lae’zel’s eyes, she was interested but hid it well.

But even with Karlach’s excitement, you were nervous as all hells. You knew from experience that Baldurs Gate wasn’t a fan of people with your particular build (Well, unless you work in brothels or Burlesque shows but that is a different story.) Knowing what you know about Baldurs Gate you had prepared yourself before you left to expect some comments, looks and even some shoves.

You thought you had managed to keep your anxieties under control and to yourself but that wasn’t the case. Unbeknownst to you, while you were hyperanalysing everything out of nervousness, Astarion was keeping an eye on you. He’d never seen you so nervous- That might not even be the right word, terrified seemed to be the better term.

He didn’t know why you were so scared of everything. He had seen you take down an Orthon just so he could have the information that Raphael promised him. You didn’t have to do that but you did. When he asked you why you simply smiled and said “Because it was important to you.” So he didn’t understand your fears at all. Are you scared of big crowds? Of the idea that someone could jump you? No, thats not it, you’d look more alert than anything, not dazed.

After a few hours of walking around Astarion finally spotted what it was that was scaring you so much. He noticed the glares and whispers being sent in your direction. He was happy that you weren’t an elf because you wouldn't have liked the things he was hearing. He was physically restraining himself from ripping out these peoples throat. You were beautiful. Why couldn't they see that? Why couldn't you see that?

“Isn't she ashamed of coming out here?” Just breathe, Astarion. You'll be no good to the group in prison.

“She's much too big to be in with that lot.” Astarion kept his rage to himself, but he was sure the rest of his group noticed. After all you were connected by those wriggling parasites.

Eventually you all made your way to The Elfsong Tavern when the Emperor decided to reminisce about his time working with Duke Stalemane. Astarion didn't care though, not after noticing how vulnerable you looked, how upset and withdrawn you were.

He wondered if maybe you could hear some of the comments. Or if you were so used to the treatment that you knew what they were going to say.

Karlach barrels into the Tavern with all the grace of… well- Karlach. Finally getting to sleep in a proper bed for the night. Everyone was excited for it. After the trials they had all been through they deserved some much needed rest, even just for the day.

Karlach decided to go down into the Tavern to spend her night eating and drinking, Lae'zel went to the courtyard to practice. The group had discovered a temple with a link to Mystra and naturally relayed this to Gale so that's where he probably is. As for the others? You had no idea.

You took it upon yourself to kick your shoes off and practically face planted one of the beds in the room you rented, barely taking any notice of Astarion's eyes watching your every move.

The energy it took you to not burst out into tears in the streets had taken its toll on you, you were just ready to sleep.

Astarion moved over to you cautiously, for once he was lost for words. He didn't know what to say to you, should he acknowledge the elephant in the room or ignore it?

“Astarion? Are you okay?” You lift your heavy head to look at the handsome Pale Elf that was watching you. His eyes dance with uncertainty. He seemed deep in thought. “Astarion?” You say his name a second time and manage to catch his attention.

He shook himself from his thoughts “Oh, yes, Darling? What were you saying?” He thought his recovery was smooth but his discomfort still showed on his face.

You sit up and pat the spot next to you. Astarion smiled absentmindedly, even burdened by the thoughts of horrible people you were still thinking of others first.

Astarion sits next to you, “I'm fine, but are you. Don't think I didnt notice the way people were looking at you.” He paused, not knowing if he should let on that he heard what they were saying. “Or how they were… talking about you.”

You stayed silent, looking down at your hands. Like Astarion earlier you didn't know what to say. “You noticed that?”

He looked baffled, almost offended that you thought he didn't. “Of course I did! Why wouldn't I? This is you we are talking about Darling, it's so hard for me to not notice you.” He places his hand on top of yours.

The coolness from his hand is a stark contrast to the warmth of his words to you. “Tell me, why do you allow a few rotten apples to treat you so poorly.” He uses his other hand to brush some hair from your face that had fallen when your head lowered with sadness.

“Because its true. I'm nothing special, no one will ever love me the way I want them too. I'll be alone… forever.”

Astarion's heart shattered, he knew what it was like to feel so vulnerable, so self-conscious. He hated that your life in Baldurs Gate made you feel the same.

“Oh, Darling. I wish I could show you just how wrong you are. These people? This group that you brought together, they adore you, I adore you.”

“But why? I feel hideous.” Tears well up in the corner of your eyes, prompting Astarion to lift you chin with one hand and wipe your tears with the other.

“You are far from hideous my gorgeous gorgeous girl, I think you are beautiful, a walking piece of art. You do not deserve to be treated the way you are just because you don't fit in with their callous beauty standards.” The mixture of Astarion's kind words, the nasty glares, and your exhaustion caused you to break down, tears streaming down your cheeks.

Without missing a beat Astarion wrapped his arms around you in a clumsy hug. He could feel your shoulders shake as the tears (sadly) soaked his new doublet.

“You think I'm beautiful?” You sniffled, pulling your head away from his chest but maintaining contact. He may not be physically warm but his actions and words warmed you through.

“Of course I do. Why wouldn't I? I'm not blind, Sweetheart.” A soft smile painted on his lips. Astarion could tell that his words weren't really getting through to you, he knew that it would take a long time for you to finally feel good about yourself, but he can damn well try his best.

“But-” you attempted to say before Astarion shushed you, a finger gently pressed to your lips.

“No buts. I have been around for a long time, I have bedded more men and women than I can count. But you are by far the most beautiful being I have ever laid eyes on. You are so incredibly and unapologetically you and I would do anything in my power for you to see yourself the way I do.”

“But I'm not thin like other people, how can you say I'm beautiful when I look like this? ” He moved his finger down to your chin so he could tilt your head up.

“Because you are. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, you're the best person for me. I don't want to imagine a life with anyone other than you in it. I adore you darling. I love you and I want you to be happy and I would love for it to be with me.”

Astarion could see your expression change to a more hopeful one. “You love me?”

“I do.” He responds, his eyes darting down to your lips and back to your own again. “Can I kiss you?” The question slipped from his mouth before he could think. You nod your head, still shocked by the sudden confession.

He slowly closed the gap between your lips, when they finally touched Astarion could sense all of your worries melt away. His free hand squeezing the thickness of your thigh as you shared a loving kiss. Astarions fangs brushing against your lips and occasionally nipping them as the kiss deepened.

“Fuck yes! Finally!” You both turned your heads, seeing Karlach stood in the doorway watching as the two of you kissed.

“Man Gale is going to be PISSED. He owes me 60 gold.” She senses the awkwardness she had just caused with her entrance and sheepishly backed away “Don't let me stop you, I was just leaving.”

She slams the door behind her but you could hear her yelling that she was going to be a rich woman and that she knew she had an eye for romance.

The two of you just laughed. This was perfect.

[nelkcats]

Dad War

Danny Fenton became a father and he's not panicking at all (this is a lie)

Danny should have known that asking for an uneventful week was an exaggeration. He tempted fate by saying that "nothing bad could happen now that ghosts and humans lived in peace with each other"

Of course, it was right after saying that sentence that his daughter cousin appeared in front of him with her arm melted. Having gotten used to that particular scenario he steered her into his ecto-dejecto reserves, both of them panicked when this didn't solve anything.

With no more options, Danny took her to Far Frozen, surely the Yeti would have a better idea of what was happening to the girl.

Frostbite examined Ellie just like the first time but instead of scowling like Danny had expected he looked extremely pleased, almost satisfied.

"The time has finally come" Frostbite told him happily "you must let it happen, Great One"

"Do I have to let Ellie melt down!?" Danny yelled in concern, he never thought the Yeti had a sadistic streak in him. Ellie looked just as shaken by the information.

"Not like you're thinking" The Yeti noticed his mistake and decided to explain himself "she's not melting, she's stabilizing"

"If I'm stabilizing, why is my arm goo?" Ellie groaned, the sensation of melting never failed to be strange.

"That explanation is much simpler" Frostbite smiled "how old are you, little Phantom?"

"Uh" Ellie tried to assign herself an age, she aged much slower than the other halfas "16?"

"You didn't understand the question, I didn't mean how you look" Frostbite denied affectionately "how old do you consider yourself?"

“…5” Ellie muttered in embarrassment, even if her age was a bit older than that number, she felt much younger, like a child. She didn't count her early years, between Vlad and traveling the world she hadn't begun to think about it.

Even with all the knowledge stored in her head, she wanted to experience a childhood like other children, to make friends. Something that her adolescent appearance did not allow. As much as Ellie loved talking to Val, she was one of her only friends and unlike her, Val had a whole life to live.

"There is your explanation" The yeti pointed out "ghosts take the appearance of how they see themselves, your core takes into account your wishes and therefore you are reforming into a child"

Danny remembered when he first shifted into his ghost form and Frostbite explanation made sense, but his head reminded him of a very important detail.

"Wouldn't that be troublesome? A lot of people in Amity know you as my cousin” Danny pointed out worriedly. The secret of the halfas was still closely guarded.

"Well, there is a way to leave her appearance the same as it currently is, but that's up to her" Frostbite looked at the girl waiting for an answer.

"No" Ellie denied "I want it to happen, I also...I also want to have a childhood, like the others"

Ellie had always felt bitter about being the only halfa exploring the concept of death more than life; unlike Vlad and Danny who had lived fairly normal lives before their respective accidents, she had been robbed of the possibility.

She wanted to live too.

"It's settled then," Frostbite nodded "Now, this is just getting started and someone has to look after your core while you reform. Do you have any candidates in mind?"

"Danny, can you?" Ellie asked, taking the sleeve of his suit, she wouldn't have considered asking anyone else. Even if she didn't admit it, Ellie always saw him as her father.

"You don't even have to ask, I'll be here when you get back" Danny ruffled her hair with a smile.

"Thank you, dad" Ellie closed her eyes as she let herself be carried away by the sensation of her core. It was a little strange that what she thought would kill her was fulfilling her dreams.

Before the halfa could reply to the comment, Ellie melted, and the ectoplasm was quickly absorbed into her core.

Danny looked at the green stone in his hands with concern.

"How long do you think it will take her?" he asked the Yeti.

"A couple of hours" Frostbite sat down next to him "it's hard being a new parent isn't it? I still remember when my children were born"

Danny avoided mentioning that he had no idea about his children. He wondered if he had them in life or death.

"I- Ellie is my cousin," Danny tried to tell him, but his argument sounded weak.

"She doesn't seem to see you as such" The Yeti shrugged as he handed the boy a cup of tea, but the halfa refused to take it as long as he held the stone in his hands.

Frostbite snorted while setting the mug aside, a new parent, in fact.

"Uh, looks like it's time for me to leave my parents house, don't you think?" Danny tried to joke, even Jazz had her own house in another place.

He had temporarily tried it when he was balancing his college life with his spooky duties, living with Sam and Tucker was fun but in the end he came home.

"It seems so" The Yeti shrugged "congratulations, it's a girl"

Danny laughed as he held the stone closer to his chest. He had really become a father, hadn't he?

His core purred at the thought, while an invisible thread connected the two half-ghosts.

Being a parent didn't sound bad. Maybe it wasn't even as hard as people made it out to be.

───────────────

Danny regrets that last thought, he regrets it so much.

He just had to think that, didn't he?

As usual, he called Jazz to inform her of the day's events as he held the stone to his chest (Frostbite had told him it was safe to do so).

Jazz didn't seem too surprised by the news, on the contrary, she started recommending him books on parenting, so many books.

Danny tried to tell her that Ellie probably wouldn't be a difficult child, he got a 30-minute lecture on how she'd probably regress to the mental age of 5 or 6, and therefore he had to be prepared for it.

Deciding to listen to his older sister, Danny googled for advice.

Checking on wikihow how to take care of a child didn't work, Danny could attest to that.

The halfa sighed as he looked at the "I'll bring you some books tomorrow" message that Jazz had send him. Did he really have to read?

It couldn't be that hard, right? His parents took care of Jazz and she ended well!

Danny was ignoring Sam's voice in his head saying that "Jazz is the spiders georg of children and should not be counted"

Of course, Danny was also avoiding to look at the fact that his parents also took care of him and he kinda died. Ellie was already half dead so he couldn't fucked up that part.

He put his phone aside as he stared at the stone on his chest. It had been hours, was Ellie okay? Perhaps something had gone wrong?

He frowned wondering if he should call Frostbite when he noticed the glowing core. Before he knew it he had a 5-year-old girl crushing his stomach.

"Ouch," Danny groaned in pain "fatherhood hurts"

"Daddy! Daddy!" Ellie jumped on his stomach, she didn't seem to notice the change in title "Look! Look! Do you like my new look?"

Realizing that Jazz was right, Danny pretended to think for a few minutes, Ellie looked bummed out at his lack of response.

"Of course I love it!" Danny scooped her up into his arms as she giggled "you look perfect!"

Ellie chuckled as she ran off to Danny's room where she had kept his phone before the whole mess.

"I'll be back soon! I have to tell Val!" The girl ran off, probably forgetting that she could go through the ceiling and get to the room faster.

Danny gave her a thumbs up, as soon as Ellie disappeared down the stairs he lay back on the couch rubbing his stomach. His daughter had strength.

"We're definitely moving" he muttered, closing his eyes. Not in a million years would a girl with that much energy go unnoticed.

Danny checked his phone again and saw messages from Sam and Tucker. The halfa pouted, Jazz was a gossip.

───────────────

"Are you sure you have everything?" Tucker asked, checking a list on his PDA. No matter how many years passed, he still loved his technology and refused to throw it away.

"Definitely sure" Danny yawned as he loaded the boxes onto the GAV. Ellie was asleep in the passenger seat.

"Papers?" Tucker checked the list.

"Legal and illegal" Danny held up a folder "Thanks for that, by the way"

"You're welcome man" Tucker shrugged. He had created Ellie's papers a while back, but they had never been needed. Adapting the age was a surprise.

"Food? Money? Clothes?" Tucker recited the list, to Danny's nod he continued, "materials to put together the new portal?"

"Ready" Danny pointed to the box that said "danger", there were also the ectoplasm samples.

"I still think that's a stupid idea" Sam rolled her eyes "that thing killed you"

"Yes, but we need ectoplasm on a regular basis and well, building one was the easiest way to get it" the halfa shrugged. It still made him shudder to think about the accident but the portal was necessary "Besides, portals don't measure distance in the Realms, I can build one that's only a few feet from home"

Also, having Far Frozen close to them was always an advantage and the ghosts had promised not to invade the new town without his permission. He still couldn't believe he was moving to New Jersey.

"That's the only reason I'm letting you get away with it," Jazz snorted as she bent down to kiss her brother's forehead "Remember, we're just a phone call away"

"I know, I know, you don't need to move out as well" Danny shook his head amused, he felt that if he didn't stop them they would really try to " I never thought I would have to move"

"It's been so long since the accident" Sam remembered as she placed a hand on her hip "even though it seems like yesterday"

"It feels like it happened yesterday" Danny admitted while touching the scar on his hand. The memories of the electrocution were still fresh in his mind.

"By the way dude, are you sure to leave Vlad as her biological father?" Tucker winced at the document, he could see the reason but he didn't like it.

"Of course, that idiot must pay me child support" Danny smiled "eat the rich and all that"

Having an excuse to spend Vlad's money was always fun. And if his stupid biological sex could help that, he would use it. Danny was honestly relieved that his legal documents had been changed. He wondered if Vlad knew the real reason why he was never able to create a male clone.

"You could just ask us for money" Sam patted his shoulder "Tucker and I could support your poor ass"

Both had been very successful in their respective fields. Sam had graduated in law and was getting another degree as an Environment Protection Technician, she had changed a lot in a short time. On the other side, Tucker had created his own Technology & Security company, he was currently negotiating a deal with Wayne Enterprises.

Danny had a feeling that his friend wanted to use him to close a deal and had suggested the city as an option for that reason. Bludhaven wasn't far from Gotham after all.

"Just because I'm unemployed doesn't mean I'm poor" Danny pouted "I'll get a job in the new town before you know it"

"I hope so, your savings aren't going to stretch that long" Jazz sighed. Her brother's lack of planning never ceased to be worrisome "Oh, and don't forget to take off your blinder, you need to breathe"

Danny frowned at the comment but nodded. His ghost form was more comfortable because it suited his chosen gender, he wondered if he could change the human as well.

"Okay, I guess that's it" Tucker put the PDA away  "remember not to drive like either of your parents, we don't want you to get a ticket so quickly"

"Nor that the weather news announces when you're going out" Sam smirked, she remembered when Lance Thunder started announcing when Jazz and Danny were learning to drive.

"That's impossible, you know I'm an excellent driver and therefore I'm not going to get a ticker" Danny stuck out his tongue at his best friend.

"Whatever you say Danny" Sam snorted "call us when you get there, and have a safe trip!"

His friends and sister said goodbye to him as he got on the GAV. He started driving away from home. It wasn't long before he passed the "Welcome to Amity Park" sign. The little ghost drawings around it made him smile.

Still, Danny was offended by the skepticism of his friends, he was sure that he was not going to get a ticket anytime soon.

───────────────

An officer was giving him a ticket.

Danny banged his head against the steering wheel of the vehicle as the police officer asked him the routine questions.

"Does this vehicle have a license?" The officer raised an eyebrow. Danny sighed as he handed over the GAV papers, he had licensed all of his parents' inventions long ago "Okay- wait, is this a SUV?"

"No, it's a GAV" Danny growled without further explanation, he was still annoyed by the situation. Clockwork was laughing at him from his damned tower, he was sure "Do you need anything else, officer...Grayson?"

Officer Grayson looked at the vehicle with doubt, the damn thing had more modifications than the Batmobile, he really hoped the boy wasn't some future villain.

He had so many questions to ask.

Before Dick could question him further or Danny risked murder on his first day in town, Ellie woke up from her nap.

"Daddy?" Ellie yawned looking at the driver's seat curiously "Are we there yet?"

All the halfa's anger melted away and his attitude took a complete turn.

"No honey, we got pulled over for speeding but we're in town now" Danny leaned down to brush her hair out of her face "you can go back to sleep"

"You're a bad driver" his daughter smirked, she wondered if driving skills were hereditary.

"Are you new in town?" Dick leaned in curiously, the girl reminded him of his own daughter.

Danny was about to tell him it was none of his business but Ellie answered first.

"¡Yes! We're moving" Ellie smiled "That's why we brought all the boxes, I'm going to enroll in a new school and dad is going to get a job"

"That sounds wonderful" Dick smiled softly as he handed Danny the ticket along with the GAV's papers "You should be more careful on the streets, I don't think there is anywhere that accepts 120 km/hr as a normal speed"

The halfa frowned, didn't the officer have a heart!? At least he could forgive a new neighbor for a silly mistake!

"Yeah, yeah, thanks" he murmured as he put the ticket in the glove compartment.

"Well, all seems to be in order" Dick straightened up "you can follow your way, enjoy Bludhaven!"

Danny hoped that he would never see him again.

When he arrived at his new house, the halfa carried Ellie to the couch and let her sleep, after which he began to unload the things from the GAV.

He wondered if he should start unpacking everything or just sleep. He felt tired at the thought of opening all those boxes and fell asleep on the couch with his daughter.

When he woke up it was night, Danny peeked out of the window as he heard a motorcycle park next door. Perhaps he could see his neighbors?

He gaped at the sight of fucking Officer Grayson reaching down to grab a little girl and carry her into his arms.

Wasn't it enough to be physically perfect and heartless, but he also had to be a good father? Damn everything!

It had to be a fucking joke

X

[redfoxwritesstuff]

AN: Opps, what happened here?

Summary: You had a job to do. It was a more complex job than people gave you credit for, a deeper job than seeing to the physical needs of your clients. Having been summoned to Pride Manor once again, you knew Lucifer's needs this holiday season were, like many of your clients, so much deeper than just indulging in the sin of lust but that was alright, you were prepared to be exactly what and who he needed this night.

CW: Sex worker Reader, P in V smut

Lucifer paced the hall, boots echoing through the long, empty halls. Each time he turned sharply on his heels, his thumb rubbed over the glossy finish of your card. The details were embossed, a silky looping of letters under his thumb. He didn’t need to look at the card to know your name or the phone number to call to summon you. The details on the card were seared into his memory, each pass of his thumb over the information just reinforced the memory. 

It wasn’t often he had called the number on the card. Far less often than he ran his fingers over it, pacing the cold, empty halls of the manor. Tonight was one of those rare nights he made the call, requesting your services for what was only the fourth time. 

Guilt clawed at him for having done so. You were more than your body or the services you offered. Though he was a firm believer in a person’s rights to sell their services, but he wasn’t fond of the idea of purchasing those services himself. Every time he called, he felt disgusted with himself. 

He was the king of hell, for Satan’s sake. He shouldn’t need to buy companionship. He wasn’t unattractive; he knew he could go into the city and find anybody to warm his bed, but… he didn’t want to. 

He told himself again and again that he wasn’t pathetic for calling for you. It was something he struggled to believe. It was just easier to hire someone than to fulfill his needs than to go through the song and dance. He was just… buying a speed pass. 

You were so much more than a hired a companion for the night. That’s what he liked to call you, anyway. You provided him much more than physical pleasure. You laughed at his jokes and admired his ducks.

You were kind and funny. That was important to him, more than the amazing rack on your chest, though he didn’t mind those in the slightest. You had the prettiest eyes he had seen in decades. 

Still, he felt… weird calling for you. He was the king of hell. He shouldn’t need to pay for the services… the company of a partner. It had been so long since Lilith left, through and he was lonely. The holidays were a time for family, for friends, and he was alone. 

Charlie… she was off with her friends, with her girlfriend. Her old man probably didn’t even cross her. He didn’t fault her for it. She was grown now. She had her own life and deserved to spend it with the people that mattered to her. 

Even if that left him alone during the holiday season. 

He didn’t have to be alone. 

“You called for me, Your Majesty?” You always came into the manor in that way, giving him the highest respects. 

Your voice startled him out of his thoughts. He shoved the smoothe card into his breast pocket. Though he had been expecting you and had seen you before, his palms broke out in a sweat. 

“Your Majesty?” Your voice was sweet, words coming out well formed and carrying almost a melody in them. 

Most Sinners didn’t afford him such respect, often not realizing he could easily give them a final death with a flick of his pinky. It wasn’t a power he flaunted, using it infrequently over the last decade. 

“Hello, Luci.” Lucifer cringed, smile turning brittle as he resisted the urge to run. “I mean, just call me Luci. We went over this.” 

You straightened from your curtsy. “We have,” you agreed, wearing the soft smile Lucifer thought about so often. “But I think you’re a man worthy of respect. As such, should I not greet my king in such a way rather than assume?” 

Your words flustered him, a golden flush rising quickly to his pale face, warming the red circles on his cheeks. There were few who thought he was worthy of any respect, let alone who didn’t require a show of power to offer it. Your respect and kindness had his stomach tied in knots. You always had that effect on him. It was a power he hadn’t felt another have over him in so long. 

“Shall we go to bed?” Lucifer asked, chucking lightly as he tried to force an air of command or at least confidence, but feared he had failed.

“I’m not tired, My King.” You sauntered up to him, hips swaying as you walked. You knew why he had called you. It was why anyone ever called a prostitute. It wasn’t for sex, though that was part of it. He was lonely. He wanted to be seen, to be heard, to be held, to be loved, if only for a little while. 

It was a task you were more than willing to see to, even standing in his family home, his ex-wife and daughter looking down on you from the walls. The state of his marriage wasn’t your responsibility. It wasn’t your responsibility to pick up his phone and call his daughter for him. 

It was your responsibility to feel him, to see him, to hear him, to love him… just for a night. 

And that’s what you did. 

Reaching out, you let your hand rest against his chest, running it across the layers of fabric he wore. Jacket. Vest. Shirt. Layers and layers to defend him from the world, to keep him hidden from prying eyes. So much effort put into ensuring no one got a glimpse of the man under it all, not that he left the manor often. 

You would strip each and every one of those layers from him in more ways than one until he was naked before you. That was the service he was paying you for and with him, you didn’t mind. 

“I meant… shall we go upstairs… to do.. do the thing?” Lucifer tripped over his words, as he so often did early in your encounters. It was cute how you could fluster the very king of hell himself. It made you feel powerful and desired in a way none of your clients ever had… or your partners in life. 

“Yes,” you purred, leaning in to speak into his ear as you sauntered around behind him, “Let’s go upstairs and do the thing.” 

“Right!” Lucifer yelled, his voice so loud you would have flinched back if you were not expecting it. You were, though. Lucifer was a kind, anxious, but somewhat predictable man. As you draped your arm over his chest, pressing your chest into his back. “Let’s ah go!” 

For a moment, as you let him take you by the hand and lead you through the halls, you imagined him dressed in a red plumber’s outfit, jumping out of a green pipe. It was a fleeting image, not one fair in the slightest to the height challenged king but one that had your smile pulling wider, honest, for a moment. 

What movement and confidence he had gained, fleeing from the throne room, died as the door to his bedchamber clicked closed behind you. You were used to the swings of Lucifer’s mood, his confidence. Learning your client’s moods and behaviors was a part of the job.

A less experienced worker would hesitate with the change of mood, but that wasn’t you. You knew what you were doing, what you were here for. It didn’t matter what storm your client’s mood would bring, you would weather it. That was no different with Lucifer. 

Lucifer stood, timid and frozen as you pulled the top had that served in so many ways as his crown from his head. You wondered, as you often did, if he had a traditional crown hidden away in the manor somewhere. It wasn’t something you would ever ask. That wasn’t your place, not now, not ever. 

“So handsome,” you purred, setting the hat aside before running your fingers through his hair. He leaned into the touch, as you knew he would. The king, too timid to say what he wanted, what he needed was touch starved from years of isolation. 

You pulled the jacket back, letting it slide down his shoulders while you moved around his front. He was an attractive man, something that always surprised you once you got to see him without the shadows of the hat to hide his face from you. 

One layer down. Nimble fingers worked the fastenings open on his vest, slowly stripping him of the ringmaster’s mask he wore. The king of hell summoned you, but that was not who you would lie with. 

No, you never lie with the people who summoned you. They were the people they wanted to believe themselves to be. You would strip them bare, take all the trappings of station and wealth, leaving it discarded on the floor. 

Once you had them naked, they were just a person. Just a body. Just a soul. What they needed was always the same, though how you would give it would change to their needs. They needed comfort and for someone to see them as they were. 

“Lucifer,” you whispered his name, waiting for his eyes to raise and meet yours. “Are you going to touch me today?” You pushed the vest back, letting it fall as well before beginning to unbutton his shirt. “Or do you want to just lay back, relax and let me take care of you tonight?”

His hands twitched, fingers flexing, before he willed himself to move. It was always a struggle for him to start, but once he did, the feel of your skin under his hands would be enough to keep his attention on you. The demons in his mind held him back until then. 

You sighed as he brushed your hair back. fingers ghosting over your skin as he pulled you to him. This was always how he started and it was something you appreciated. There was a caring, an honest kindness to his touch that most of your clients lacked, especially the more powerful of them. 

He held you for a moment, the deep plunging V of your dress allowing his newly exposed chest to press directly into your flesh. The warmth of him sank into you, warming something in you that none of the heat of hell seemed to touch. 

This was a part of it, you had learned early on. Sometimes, men just wanted to hold and be held. It was something they so rarely allowed themselves, that society insisted on ripping them apart for. That is why you made it a point to wrap your arms around them, holding them tightly to you for as long as it took. 

It was an embrace men often melted into, with some resistance at first, sure. Lucifer had cried the first time you had wrapped your arms around him, returning his embrace with the security and warmth of not a hired body but of a lover. 

That was what you really were, what they were hiring you for, even if they struggled to admit it to themselves at first. That was what you prided yourself in being for them. Unlike many of your peers, you took pride in your work, even enjoyed it.

There was a pleasure in being embraced for you, too. Standing there, holding your partner of the night in your arms as they clutched you, waiting for their grip to slacken and for them to pull back, you felt needed in a way that the raging boners and wet cunts of the bodies you serviced could never equal. 

You held him and waited, shifting your weight from side to side on your heels as you rocked his body with yours. If he was smaller, they’d call the action motherly. You preferred to think of it as a dance, soft and sweet. In time, Lucifer’s grip loosened as he pulled away, stepping into the swaying dance you had started. 

His face was flushed golden, as it had been every time you’d done this dance with him. His eyes were ringed with it, bloodshot from how close he had come to tears. You wouldn’t mention it. It didn’t need to be said verbally. The soft smile on your pink painted lips said it all. 

“I’m sorry,” Lucifer said, as you knew he would. “We should get moving.” 

“You booked me until morning,” you reminded him. “There’s no need to rush.” 

This, too, was quickly becoming routine. 

“Can I kiss you?” Lucifer’s voice came low as he looked up at you. 

He had wanted a tall, slim woman with large curves and while you were slim and had some curves, you were far from the towering height he had requested. 

The agency knew better than to give someone exactly what they wanted to replace. It never worked out well in the worker’s favor… or the client’s. None of you could replace a lost love. Trying only ended in either obsession or heartbreak. Neither was good for business. 

“I’d like that.” Your smile spread wider as your hand ran up his chest, fingers tucked under the edge of his shirt. The warmth of his chest soaked into your hand. 

His hand wrapped around you, pulling you closer. Long fingers carded through your hair, wrapping in the soft strands as he pulled your lips to his. Lips met in a soft sigh, lingering touches spread over bodies as Lucifer’s needs in the moment shifted. 

You were ready. It was your job to expect it, not being surprised as he pulled the bow at the back of your neck. Silk ribbon slipped against silk ribbon as the only thing holding the dress on your body was reduced to nothing more than fluttering fabric. 

The dress fell from your body in a whoosh, gathering around your feet. You, ever the dutiful lover, quickly worked the remaining buttons free on his shirt. Strong muscles that would surprise most of the sinners in hell flexed under your hands as you pushed the shirt off his shoulders. 

The shirt hung from the back of his pants in a comical tail, trapping his arms and limiting his range of motion as he tried to pull your body into him again. 

“Ducking hell,” Lucifer said, ripping his shirt from where it was still tucked into his pants. You couldn’t help the giggle that slipped from your lips. “Sorry.” 

“Don’t be,” you kissed him softly, cutting off any whispered remorses. You didn’t want to hear them. It wasn’t his job to be sorry. He could say whatever cute curses he wanted with you. It wasn’t your job to judge them. “It’s cute. You’re cute.” 

“You think so?” There was a vulnerability in the question, as if no one had called him cute in a rather long time. Perhaps, if they had, he wasn’t in a place to hear it. 

“I do,” you whispered, catching his cheek with a soft kiss. It was an honest answer. Regardless of what you were being paid for tonight, you found the king of hell to be rather cute. He was a charming man, handsome and with a body anyone would be glad to have pressed against them. Yet he had a boyish wonder in his eyes, a goofy smile that held no malice. 

You arched into his kisses, presenting more of your chest, the swells of your breasts to him as he kissed lower and lower. As he worked, his hands ran trails up and down your back, taking in the feel of having a body under his fingertips again. 

You walked backward, toward the large bed as you worked his belt open. Each movement was slow, practiced and waiting. It was important to give him the chance to take the lead, to direct the activity of the night. 

In what few meetings you had shared with him, Lucifer was a timid but generous lover. It was you that was being paid to provide pleasure and yet he would take the time to taste you, seeing to it that you enjoyed the job you were getting paid for. 

You had let to leave Pride Manor in a state of anything less than sexual satisfaction. What exactly it was that he liked, though, you couldn’t be sure yet. There was plenty of time to figure it out, however. Or, at least, you hoped that would be the case. 

You sighed as his pants fell around his ankles, cock springing free to slap his stomach at last. There was something different about tonight, though Lucifer had not said it. He was in hurting. It was a deep pain that reached down to his very soul and while you had no illusions that you could fix it for him, that you could heal him, you were eager to be a bandage for the night. 

You’d have come even if he wasn’t paying you, not that you’d ever tell the agency or the King that. If you did, that was a great way to find yourself dead, body respawning while you were stripped of every position you had accumulated over the decades. 

He whimpered, a sad, needy sound deep in his throat when you wrapped your hand around his cock. You pumped your hand over the silky smooth skin of his shaft. With careful pressure of your hands, you spun him with you, putting his back to the bed. 

Guiding him, you pushed and pushed, kissing him as you did until he sad down on the bed. His hands roamed you, taking in the weight of your breasts and the curve of your hips as you continued the kiss him deeply. The bed dipped as you rested one knee on the outside of his hips. 

His tongue swept into your mouth as he scooted back, hips bucking up into your hand as he did so. You followed him, crawling after him as you straddled his legs. The pointed claws of his hand ran down your stomach, dipping between your thighs, finding you wet and ready for him. 

Some workers applied artificial lube to themselves before their appointments, giving the illusion of an eager body for the client. It wasn’t a trick you were above using yourself. Not all partners were pleasing to your eye, nor were they all sexually stimulating. 

With Lucifer, though, you had no issues allowing your body to self lubricate. He was pleasing to the eye and oh, your body reacted eagerly to his touch. It took as little as his heated gaze, his soft whimpers to have your slick gathering between your legs. 

A moan, soft and honest, slipped from your lips as he caressed your clit. Slick covered fingers ran over the bud of nerves, circling it and passing over it again and again. He played your body with the expert ease of a man who had spent many nights in the company of a woman. 

And yet, she had left him. It wasn’t your place to ask why. It wasn’t your place to even care about her and yet she looked down on you everywhere in the Manor. Even now, as you kissed the man that had been her husband, she looked down on you. 

Her eyes watched you as you ran the gold flushed head of her once husband’s cock through your slick folds. Together, they both watched as you sank down on him, swallowing his cock within the hot confines of your body. 

She left him and yet she was everywhere in this manor, haunting it like the ghost of what was. For a few hours, for a night, you would distract the King of Hell from the ghosts he lived with. 

He moaned, back arching and fingers flexing into your hips as you sank lower and lower. “I was-” He whimpered again as your hips met his, body taking all of his considerable size in. “I was going to eat you.” 

“Not tonight,” you purred, bouncing slightly on his lap, wrapping your arms around his neck, pushing your breasts into his chest. 

“No?” he looked at you with wide eyes. When he looked at you like that, you could see the angel he had once been. What you would give to see the man that he had once been, long ago, before humanity had become everything it was. 

“No,” you kissed him softly, encouraging him to hold your body close by holding him. “I want to take care of you tonight.” 

“You always do,” he said, as if you had hardly met more than a handful of times. “But tonight, it feels like you need someone to love you.”

“To love me?” The smile that spread on his face felt forced, brittle. If you poked it too hard, would he shatter into a million pieces? Would a simple hug be enough to put him back together again? 

“Will you let me tonight?” you whispered, forehead resting against his as you slowly lifted yourself off his cock, sliding back down the hard shaft with just as much of a controlled pace. “Let me love you tonight?” 

“You want to?” He asked, and in that moment, you could feel that you had him. He was entranced with everything you had to offer him. With the feel of you, he forgot you were a product, a service to be bought and sold. That was how you wanted it. 

“Yes,” you sighed into him as your hips nestled against his. 

“Okay,” he whimpered as his head fell forward, lips working over the soft skin of your chest. 

You rode him slow, wrapped up in his arms. This wasn’t your ideal position or pace, but there was something in the soft sighs, in knowing you were bringing those sounds forth from the most powerful man in all of hell that made up for it. 

It helped, too, that his cock was thick and long, caressing every nerve inside of you as you worked over him. 

“Please,” he whined, looking up at you. “Let me-”

He said nothing more. You knew he wouldn’t. When he was like this, he didn’t want to use crude language. He wanted to mount you, to fuck you, but how could he say that when fucking wasn’t what he wanted? 

What he wanted was to make love, but how could he say that to you? To a stand in? A hired body? A glorified doll?

You leaned back, spreading your legs out behind Lucifer as you pulled him down with you. It was a smoothe, practiced motion as you shifted. Lips moved against lips as your back hit the soft blankets. 

He was careful of your hips as he shifted himself, raising up onto his knees, unfolding them from under you. It felt good to be tucked under the king of hell. Your eyes fluttered open, meeting his, bathing in the soft look of love unearned. 

His cock slipped in and out of you, working your body tighter and tighter around him. He never failed to work your body toward the edge, cock easily finding every place within you that gave you pleasure. 

He leaned down, kissing you as if he loved you while he thrust into you. Strong muscles flexed and jumped as you warped your arms around him. Fingers ran through the silky golden hairs at the back of his head, digging into his scalp in such a way that had him purring. 

Being touched, held, caressed was something you had noticed early on Lucifer craved. It was easy to give him, even as he gave you pleasure. Your legs ran along his, holding onto him as he pushed into you faster. With every gasping breath of air, your chest rose. The warm skin of his body brushed against your nipples with every sweet thrust. 

“Close,” you whimpered, lips leaving his to kiss along his jaw, whispering the word into his ear. 

“Are you?” Luci whispered, looking at you with soft eyes that betrayed years of love. Part of you wished that love belonged to you, but you knew better. For the night, he would place all the love he had for his lost queen into you and you would take it with a smile, but it would never belong to you.

“I am.” Your back arched as his cock nestled into your walls again and again. 

He was a talented lover. Each thrust of his body ran his pubic bone over your clit, pressing with just enough pressure to ensure the curls at the base of his cock drug against your sensitive bundle of nerves. 

Each pass of his body over you, through you, sent sparks to life, catching on the embers of your waiting orgasm. You clung to him as he stoked the fire inside you, panting breaths mingling as he kissed you again. 

No one kissed you as much as Lucifer did. It wasn’t something you would usually allow, but you made an exception for him. When it was Lucifer, you wanted to taste his kiss and pretend for a little while it was you they were meant for. 

You moaned his name, a long, drawn out sound as your body clamped down around him. He swore, something you rarely heard him do as his cock swelled, twitched and finally shot his seed inside you. Each strong contraction of your walls around him urged him on, pulling him and his seed deeper and deeper. 

You clung to him as he thrust, pace slowing, riding out the waves of his orgasm as he softened. He always moaned a name when he finished, deep and buried under years of pain. If you didn’t know, you could miss it. 

Lilith.

The woman who looked down on you, a simple sex worker, from the grand paintings of the manor. She was a woman you could never hope to be like, who you knew you never would be like. That was alright with you. 

Lucifer shifted, cock now soft and easily falling from your body. In a daze, he fell to his side and gathered you to his chest. Warm breath washed over your head as he tucked you closer to him. The weight of a blanket settled over you, materializing out of nothing in a subtle show of power he never seemed to think twice of. 

“I love you,” Lucifer said as sleep quickly claimed him, as he had every night you had shared in your post orgasm daze. It squeezed your heart, cracking it for the kind king who had been cast aside as if he was nothing. “Merry Christmas.”

Join us at VoxTek for a Vox themed Hazbin Discord where we talk Vox, Hazbin, writing, reading, art and who knows what else. You may even catch some exclusive sneak peeks at upcoming fics from some of your favorite writers including the first page of the next chapter of MisD a day early!!

[animeomegas]

The Quest for a Second Life - Part 7 - 50 Shades of Audacity (3)

KAKASHI X ALPHA!READER

Summary: The Autumn Company Party. It had been the centre of the storyline for reasons unknown, and now it was upon you. Whatever happened though, this was sure to be your last night in Kakashi's pocket universe, and a difficult decision was right around the corner. At least you had one final attempt to get your dick wet. GN!Dom!Alpha!Reader x Multiple

Word count: 10k

Warnings: N-sfw content, talks of collaring, alcohol consumption, Kakashi's abandonment issues. All alpha have dicks, fyi.

A/N: The final major part is done!!! Gosh, it's been such a journey and it's bittersweet to see it coming to an end. Happy holidays to everyone and I hope you enjoy this final part. @omeganronpa has a tough choice for the epilogue, which will be released on Christmas day :D Direct all arguments, begging and bribery here! May the best omega win! <3

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Epilogue

Despite your best attempts, you never did get an explanation of Kakashi’s strange behaviour during that phone call. Kakashi had remained tight-lipped in the face of every strategy you used to weasel the information out of him. You fully believed that, if you had been given the appropriate amount of time, you would have eventually extracted the information, but unfortunately, time had been something of a rarity over the last few weeks.

The Autumn Company Party had approached like a speeding train, and you had been forced against your will to do your job and aid in the planning. You had lost track of how many times the importance of the event had been explained to you at this point, mainly to justify your massive and ever-growing workload.

“Every important investor and stakeholder will be in attendance!” You didn’t care.

“The board of directors will be there!” You really didn’t care.

“This will be your debut as the CEO’s secretary, if you don’t make a good impression, you could be fired and blacklisted!” You especially didn’t care about that one. Don’t threaten people with a good time.

No, the part itself wasn’t something you particularly cared about. It was going to be a boring work party, like every other one you’d attended in your life, that would be partially saved by the fact that you got to be the one to design the menu with the catering company.

No, you cared about whatever the other ‘thing’ at the party would be. This was the climax of the story, and that was putting you on edge. Even James didn’t know what would happen, but she seemed completely convinced that something would.

And so, it was with a weird combination of foreboding, fatigue, and excitement that you were putting together the finishing touches of your outfit, ten minutes before Kakashi was scheduled to pick you up and take you to the party.

It felt weird, standing in a still unfamiliar flat, looking in an unfamiliar mirror, to see a done-up version of yourself that you didn’t recognise. Because really, that had been the only thing you had carried with you from your real life. You had always been you, in body and mind, even as reality melted and reformed around you.

And you still were you, of course, just a version of you that was wearing more expensive clothes, had styled hair, and donned with more jewellery than you normally would. It just made you feel strange.

You straightened, brushing down imaginary creases in your outfit, and pointed at your own reflection accusatorily. “Get over yourself. You’re wearing nice clothes, stop being dramatic.”

There, that should fix it. You were just nervous about the unknown ‘thing’ that would be happening tonight, and it was bleeding into everything else.

Your phone buzzed on your desk, almost certainly a text from Kakashi telling you that he was outside. With one final glance in the mirror, you left the flat, wondering vaguely if you’d be back to see it before the demo ended. If this party was indeed the climax of this story, then you might never return.

You gave the flat a little goodbye wave, just in case.

As you exited the building, the chill of the Autumn wind caught you off guard. You wrapped your arms around yourself, already regretting the decision not to bring a coat, and hurried towards the sleek, black car that was waiting for you.

Kakashi stepped out of the car as you approached and held open the door for you.

You grinned, “What a gentleman, thank you.”

“Of course.” He followed you back into the car and shut the door behind him, leaving you enclosed in the glorious warmth of Kakashi’s heated car and its heated seats. “You look beautiful.”

You knew it was a standard thing to say in a situation like this, but Kakashi just had a way of making compliments sound so genuine. Maybe because he wasn’t the type to keep his negative opinions to himself. Either way, you were flattered.

“Thanks, Kakashi, I appreciate that. And you paying for the outfit, of course.” You took a moment to study him, in turn. He was wearing a well tailored suit like he always was, but to match the celebratory feel, he’d gone for a dark green colour scheme as opposed to his usual monochrome. Although the lighting inside the car was dim, it was easy to see how well the colour suited him. “You’re looking incredibly handsome, yourself. What a pair we make.”

“A very attractive pair indeed,” Kakashi agreed, taking one of your hands in his. He gave it a squeeze, so you gave one back.

Silence fell, and for a moment, you focused on the way Kakashi’s thumb was rubbing on the back of your hand. This was the first time you’d been properly alone for a while now, and you found your mind drifting back to that weird phone call. You decided to ask him about it again now, seeing as he had nowhere to run.

“Kakashi—”

“I—”

You had both started to speak at once.

“Sorry, I didn’t—” You started to apologise.

“No, I’m sorry, what were you going to say?”

“Oh, it was nothing, you go first.”

Kakashi looked like he was going to argue, but he clearly decided against it and said what was on his mind.

“At the party, we can’t behave as we’d normally do at the office,” he said. “Our relationship isn’t compatible with our jobs, and while the people in my office are friendly and mostly discreet, stakeholders and board members have a track record for being less so.”

Kakashi looked guilty, so you gave his hand another squeeze to show that you didn’t hold this against him. It made sense that an important work party wasn’t the right place for making out, but you wondered if he thought that you thought he was ashamed of your relationship or something.

“I understand. Old, rich people are terrible at keeping their noses out of other people’s business.”

“That’s certainly putting it lightly,” Kakashi muttered. He seemed more frustrated that you’d expected for what was objectively a minor issue.

Granted, you had kind of been expecting some kind of action at this party, this being the climax of a porn universe narrative, but you’d live if it turned out that the ‘thing’ was something non-horny. Honestly, you’d be happy if you got through the night without any more spontaneous stripping.

“Hey, it’s only one night, right? We can manage.” Kakashi looked at you consideringly, before a small smile bloomed on his face.

“One night,” he repeated, voice soft. “I can do that.”

“We’re five minutes away, sir.”

You took a deep breath. No matter what this party threw at you, you could handle it!

…

Apparently, what this party was throwing at you was extreme boredom.

Admittedly, it wasn’t an entirely lost cause. The venue was dazzling and incredibly fancy, and you knew you’d never stepped foot in a hotel so expensive before. Walking through the front doors with Kakashi, dressed to perfection… well, it had felt a little like you were royalty. It was incredibly good for the old self-esteem.

Once you had actually entered the party though, it was a whole different story.

While your coworkers were quick to compliment you, which was lovely, it was clear that they were too on edge to be having fun. The music was quiet, which was better for talking and networking, but didn’t exactly encourage dancing. And whenever you did try to speak to new people, they wanted to ask about your professional qualifications and experiences working under Kakashi. The cherry on top of this awful cake was that the only alcohol offered was champagne, which wasn’t your favourite, nor did it numb the boredom of the party very well.  

You had barely even seen Kakashi, bar a few quick flashes in passing as he schmoozed his way through the hall like a pro. His serious warning about not behaving like a couple seemed a bit dramatic now, seeing as you hadn’t even had the chance to make eye contact.

‘Are you sure it was just a warning, human?’

You jumped at James’ sudden interjection. You furtively glanced around you to make sure that none of your coworkers had noticed your seemingly out of place reaction. Thankfully, people seemed too busy to care.

‘What do you mean? What else could it have been?’

‘…’

‘James?’

‘Perhaps it was an explanation, human.’

‘An explanation? An explanation for what? Surely that means the same thing as a warning in this context.’

James didn’t respond. How bizarre. You didn’t much care for having a riddle added on top of your evening. Honestly, if it were just a boring party, you would have found someway to have fun, but you knew that some kind of event would be unfolding here, which was putting you on edge. Every second that ticked by completely normally felt like it was building to something big. And James’ riddles weren’t helping assuage the anxiety that sensation was creating.

Between the stress, the lack of alcohol, and the enforced networking, it was an exceptionally mid party, even if it was pretty.

The only saving grace was the buffet table, that you were slowly weaving your way back towards for probably the tenth time that night. This time, you decided to just remain lingering by the food in the hopes that it would stop people from asking questions about a degree you didn’t actually do.

You loaded up your plate was as much as you could and then found an empty section of wall to lean on. You popped one of the mac and cheese balls in your mouth and almost moaned at the flavour sensation that followed. They were heavenly, salty and creamy, and the breadcrumbs around the outside had just the right amount of crispiness. Like everything else on the buffet, it had an impressive depth of flavour. You weren’t ashamed to admit that having access to this catering company was on the pros column for staying in this world.

Consumed in your world of cheesy goodness, you almost didn’t notice when what you thought was a member of waitstaff leant against the wall next to you. He was carrying a tray of hors d’oeuvres, and you wondered if he was just taking a break or if you were somehow in his way.

“How are you holding up?” Hearing a familiar voice come from what you thought was a stranger had you doing a double take. You were met with Iruka’s charming grin. He was dressed in a standard black suit that obviously wasn’t tailored the way Kakashi’s were, but somehow, he pulled off the ‘slightly too big’ look with a level of a scampish charm.

What you had originally thought was a tray of hors d’oeuvres was in fact a plate that Iruka had stacked full of shot glasses, each one filled with a mini ramen. As he waited for your response, he grabbed one of the glasses and poured the ramen into his mouth with a satisfied hum.

Ah, you thought, amused, he’d wasted no time finding them.

“As well as can be,” you said, answering his original question. “How about you? Enjoying the food?”

Iruka, who was in the middle of eating a second ramen shot, paused for a second, his ears going slightly red. You snorted, averting your eyes for a second to allow him to finish the ramen shot in peace.

“Thanks,” he muttered, referring to your insistence that the catering team create a ramen hors d’oeuvre. “Makes this ridiculous party worth it.”

“No, thank you,” you countered, referring to his substantial help with the planning and paperwork for this event when your duties got a bit overwhelming. “I couldn’t have got everything finished without your help.”

“Too busy running around with Kakashi?” When you didn’t defend yourself, he rolled his eyes fondly. “You two are menaces. Actually, speaking of Kakashi, shouldn’t you be getting ready with him to go on stage about now?”

“What?” That was the first you’d heard about any obligation to go on stage. If this turned into a cheesy scene where you had to do something ridiculous like sing a duet with Kakashi, you were going to riot, possible retaliations from porn logic be damned. You did not sign up for High School Musical shenanigans. “Why would I have to go on stage?”

“Oh, you don’t know? Sorry, I thought Kakashi would have explained it to you.”

“Okay, fine, but he obviously didn’t, so could you please tell me why I have to go on stage?” Was this what James meant by the big ‘thing’ that would be happening at the Autumn Company Party?

“Of course.” Despite his positive response, Iruka then proceeded to eat another one of his ramen shots, and only after he was done, did he continue with the explanation. “Every year, Kakashi gives a speech around halfway through the party. Normal stuff, just summarising the last year, talking about new projects, thanking all the generation donators and stakeholders. The CIO of the company, Tsunade, stands by him for the speech, and for the first few years, his personal assistant stood behind him too. He hasn’t had one for a while, but now you’re here, you’ll need to stand behind him with Tsunade.”

You squinted your eyes suspiciously. “And I won’t have to speak?”

“Nope,” Iruka said, brightly. “You just have to stand there.”

Huh, that wasn’t so bad. It was slightly annoying that you were being taken away from the buffet table, but you would live.

‘You are being very brave, human.’

‘Thanks, James.’ Again, you had no idea if she didn’t know what the concept of sarcasm was, or she deployed it with skill on a never-before-seen scale. It was definitely either or, but which one, you would never know.

“Wait,” you said, suddenly remembering what Kakashi had told you about your interview with him. “Kakashi used to have a personal assistant? He said he didn’t want one because he worked better alone.”

Iruka hesitated. He looked left, then right, and when he saw that you were as alone as you could be, he leant in close and whispered.

“His old personal assistant is why he didn’t want a new one,” he explained. “At first, it didn’t seem like anything was wrong with him, but it turned out he had been placed there by the board to spy on Kakashi and relay information back. Kakashi fired him as soon as he found out, but he never accepted a personal assistant again, until the board forced him to hold interviews, and he hired you.”

“Seriously?” Iruka nodded, lips tight. “That’s crazy.” You wondered briefly how many of the people you were sitting with in the waiting room were plants from the board.

“We don’t talk about it, but everyone who was working there at the time this went down knows about it. That’s one of the reasons we were so surprised, not only when you were hired, but when you and Kakashi seemed to be having a personal relationship outside of work. I’m surprised he trusted you at all.”

Goodness. You leant against the wall as you considered what Iruka was saying. It was wild to think about how much resistance and betrayal Kakashi had faced from within his own company. You’d bet that they hadn’t been too happy when Kakashi turned 18 and decided he wanted to lead his company, and when they couldn’t take it from him, they kept tabs and put pressure on him as much as possible.

This information also contextualised your interview differently. Kakashi had claimed that he hired you because you were funny. You had theorised that you had awoken his submissive side, this being an erotica and all. And maybe both of those were true to some extent, but you now believed that it was far more likely that Kakashi had decided you were too rowdy, rude, and unprofessional to have been a plant from the board of directors.

It clicked his initial suspicions about your motivations into place, too. He hadn’t trusted your reasons for asking him to dinner, not at first. When you had demanded to spend time with him, you’d bet he was wandering if you were there to spy on him.

“Poor Kakashi…”

Iruka nodded solemnly, and then downed another ramen shot. You scanned the room while he did, hoping to catch Kakashi’s eye, wherever he was. It took you a moment, but then you found him, standing at the base of the stage, standing next to Tsunade. Ah fuck.

“I think I have to go, thanks for keeping me company, Iruka.”

Iruka waved his hand, “Good luck. I can look after your plate for you if you want—”

“No need.” You shoved the last handful of mac and cheese balls into your mouth, dumped the plate on the table, and then chewed furiously as you worked your way to the stage.

“There you are,” Tsunade said, two glasses of champagne in hand. She quickly downed them both and then shoved them into the hands of a poor waiter as he passed by. “Let’s get this over with.”

You tried to catch Kakashi’s eye, but he was too focused on walking to the stage. You and Tsunade followed after him, and you resolved to talk to him after the speech was finished.

Kakashi went up to the mic and you and Tsunade stood at his side, a few paces back. You spotted a few board members in the crowd, and you felt the urge to stick your tongue out at them. You just about managed to resist.

Kakashi used the knife against the champagne glass he was holding, and a sharp ting echoed through the microphone and around the room. The spotlight on the stage turned on, and suddenly you were bathed in a bright, white light. Everyone quieted and turned to face the stage.

The lights were hurting your eyes and making your skin feel hot, but at least your only job was to stand there and look pretty. You were good at that.

“Good evening, everyone,” Kakashi said, sounding effortlessly comfortable speaking in front of so many people. “Thank you all for coming tonight, and I hope you’ve been enjoying yourselves thus far.”

It was weird to hear him speak like this; he sounded very different when you two were alone. That was to be expected, you supposed, but it didn’t make it feel any less jarring.

“I won’t keep you long, but I thought it prudent to take a moment to thank everyone who has made this last year as successful as it was. To our staff, to our stake holders, and to our board members, I say thank you.” He raised his glass in a toast. “We would not have a company without you.”

This was an incredibly boring and generic speech. You had been sure that the ‘thing’ that was supposed to happen would happen now, but all that was happening was you struggling not to fall asleep in front of everyone.

“The past year has been a year of perfecting, of tweaking that which was already in place to make it perfect. Among other things, the building work on the new cafeteria was completed this year, and the debut of our first international branch went smoothly and successfully.”

Ugh, as Kakashi’s personal assistant, you knew all this stuff already. You just wanted to go back to the buffet, was that too much to ask?

“However, following the stage of perfection will always be a stage of change. We must now introduce new projects that will grow and be perfected over time, like the projects that came before them. And there is one major change that will take effect going forward.”

Confused whispers spread across the hall. You noticed a few members of the board looking specifically irritated, and you’d bet that Kakashi had not informed anyone in advance of whatever this big change was.

Even Tsunade was watching him warily from the corner of her eye.

“I’m resigning,” Kakashi announced, paired with his signature eye smile.

The room was silent enough that you could have heard a pin drop.

What?

Chaos erupted. People were shouting questions, making exclamations of disbelief, and loudly assuming this was a prank that wasn’t very funny.

Kakashi ignored the noise and leant back into the mic. “I nominate Tsunade as my successor.”

Tsunade sputtered, “Eh?! Like hell you are, brat!”

He had resigned. Kakashi had resigned as CEO of the company he had been a part of his entire life. James had said that whatever happened at the party would be a direct consequence of how you had acted in this demo. So, presumably, this was your fault, but how?

Our relationship isn’t compatible with our jobs, that’s what he’d said to you in the car. You had thought he was warning you to tone things down for the evening, but James had suggested that it wasn’t a warning, but an explanation. You hadn’t understood what she’d meant, but now you did. He was explaining to you, in his own way, why he was about to resign.

The strange phone call fit, too. He had mentioned thinking about the Autumn Company Party, and whatever was on his mind had made him seek your number for comfort, but he refused to tell what he was thinking about. He was likely thinking about whether he should resign.

While you put the pieces together, the room around you was still very much in a state of chaos. Kakashi, however looked completely calm. He put the microphone back in the stand, handed his champagne and knife to a raging Tsunade, and then turned to you.

You watched as he approached you. You could feel how wide your eyes were. You thought he was going to say something, but he got closer and closer until he was right in your personal space, where he looped an arm around your waist, pulled you tight against him, and kissed you.

He was kissing you. Kakashi was kissing you in front of his whole company. You had kissed Kakashi before, many times, but there was something about this kiss that overshadowed all the others. It took a moment for your brain to catch up to what was happening and remember to how to kiss, but you eventually found your footing.

Your lips and tongues danced together serenely, driving out the chaos of the background noise until you two were the only people that mattered. You could feel and taste the longing pouring out of Kakashi, begging you to understand him and stay by his side. You wound your hands around his neck to reassure him, and in return, he squeezed your waist affectionately.

You were quickly running out of air, but you didn’t want this moment to end.

Regardless of your wishes, however, the kiss did end. As Kakashi pulled away slowly, the bubble burst and the noise from the party came rushing back in. Questions were still being shouted, and while some people were displeased by Kakashi’s display, others cheered.

You felt like you were trapped in a daze. You half expected to topple over when Kakashi let go of you to lean back to the microphone.

“We have paid for the venue until 1am, so please enjoy the rest of the party. Goodnight!”

And with that, he grabbed you by the hand and pulled you through a stage door and out of the party. You let him, still completely stunned at what had just happened.

You walked out of the venue in silence, through a back exit for somewhat obvious reasons, and Kakashi’s car was already waiting for you both. You both slid into the warmth of the car, and the second the seatbelts were on, the car pulled away from the hotel and into the city. The bright lights filtered into the car as you drove, but the outside world had never felt so far away.

“Are you… okay?” Kakashi asked, voice nervous.

You wanted to answer him properly, really you did, but your mouth and brain weren’t quite in agreement yet, so the only thing that came out was, “I was going to fill the Tupperware in my bag with more mac and cheese bites.”

Kakashi blinked at you for a moment, before he sent you nervous smile. “I’ll order you some more, as many as you want, I promise.”

Through your embarrassment at you lacking filter, you nodded, and silence fell in the car again. Unlike the normal, comfortable silence that you shared with Kakashi, the awkwardness was palpable. You wanted to break it, but you didn’t quite know how, after everything that had just happened. When your phone buzzed, you grabbed for it desperately as an escape from the weird silence. It was a text from Kurenai.

‘Sorry for not warning you in advance what Kakashi was planning. I feel pretty guilty now, Asuma too. He says the apology is from him too.’

Right, so some people did know in advance. Honestly, you were a bit annoyed that no one had warned you. You were halfway through writing a slightly snarky text back, when she sent another message.

‘We were planning on telling you, but we had to focus on convincing Kakashi out of his idea to propose to you this evening.’

You immediately forgave them both, deleted the previous message, and instead thanked them profusely for saving you from a very awkward conversation. Oh, Kakashi.

Speaking of Kakashi, he was sitting awkwardly in his seat, staring out the window. His shoulders were incredibly tense. You couldn’t just leave him sitting there.

“So, are you really resigning?”

Kakashi swallowed heavily, “Yes… I was thinking about what you said, about having my own dreams, and I still don’t know what those dreams are yet, but I know they aren’t in that company, not anymore.”

You nodded slowly. Kakashi was watching your reaction like a hawk.

“I’m not going to leave completely, I don’t think I could,” he hastened to add. “I can’t abandon my father’s company completely, but… I need time.”

“I understand, Kakashi, it’s okay.”

“You do?” He sounded so vulnerable and lost. You undid your seatbelt and slid into the middle seat instead, before clicking the belt back on. From there, you were able to wrap your arms around Kakashi.

It was slightly awkward in the car, but you didn’t let that stop you. Kakashi fell into your arms gratefully and braced his head against your shoulder.

“I do, darling. You’ve been working your entire life at that company, Kakashi, you deserve a break. I’m already tired of working, so I can’t imagine how you feel. I’ll support whatever pathway you choose to take.”

Kakashi sagged onto you, breathing harshly and clinging onto you with desperate hands. You shushed him, and gently ran your fingers through his hair.

Poor Kakashi, you thought, holding him tightly. You could tell that he was so incredibly burnt out, but he hadn’t even noticed until someone had forced him to see that other choices existed. And once you had pulled the curtain back and showed him reality, he couldn’t bare to continue the way he had been for even a second longer.

Now that the shock had subsided, you were filled with pride for him. It wasn’t easy to leave something life-defining behind, even if you wanted to. But he had done it, and now you were going to be here to make sure he could handle the emotional backlash.

You pressed a kiss to Kakashi’s gravity-defying hair and gave him an affectionate nuzzle. If you chose this world, and your fictional family became real, you were dragging Kakashi into it.

“I want to do up my childhood home properly,” he said, pulling away and rubbing at his eyes. “I want to modernise it again, fill it with new photos and unrestrained laughter. I want to walk my dogs; I don’t want to hire a dog walker anymore. And…”

“And?” you pressed your forehead against his.

“And I hope you’ll be there with me. Because that’s one thing I do know. I love you, and I want you with me wherever I go.”

“Oh, Kakashi,” you cooed softly, pecking him on the lips. “I love you too, and I’ll follow you wherever you go, my darling.”

He sighed, relieved, “And you aren’t angry at me for not telling you that I was resigning?”

“Well, I wouldn’t say that. I would have appreciated a heads up, I won’t lie.”

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly. He dropped his head onto your shoulder. “Maybe… maybe you should punish me…”

It took a moment for his unexpected words to sink in, but when they did, heat rushed downwards.

Oh.

…

You had expected to end up at Kakashi’s penthouse, but his chauffeur had pulled up in front of your flat instead. It had given more credence to your theory that Kakashi preferred your flat to his. You didn’t mind, so you didn’t comment on it.

You could have done without the flat look Kakashi’s chauffeur had given you both when he said that he wouldn’t be needing a lift home until tomorrow though.

The warmth of your flat was a welcome change from the Autumn chill, but it was the hot, electric tension fizzling through air that really captured your attention. You both kicked off your shoes and put down your bags, but the second you were done, the tension snapped, and you slammed Kakashi against the door with your body, pressing your lips against his in an aggressive kiss.

Kakashi met your sudden kiss with no hesitation and just as much aggression. You could feel the clack of your teeth knocking together, but you couldn’t hear it over the door shaking in the frame. You sent a half-hearted apology to your neighbours for the kind of noises they were about to hear.

You kissed with urgency. Kakashi moaned into your mouth and his hands pawed at your waist. There weren’t any undertones of dominance or submissive yet, only passion. Your lips tangled with his as you pushed through the burning need for oxygen.

When you could hold out no longer, you pulled away and instead took the opportunity to nuzzle at Kakashi’s neck, inhaling his heady scent, and undo the buttons on Kakashi’s shirt.

“Your shirts still have too many buttons,” you panted against Kakashi’s skin. “I think we should burn them all.”

“If you want me naked, you just have to ask,” he said, chest heaving.

“Maybe I will.” You finished the last button, leaving Kakashi’s shirt to hang open. He was still wearing his tie and suit jacket, which framed the newly revealed sliver of skin. “Now that you’re not a big, fancy CEO, I can keep you as my naked butler.”

Kakashi snorted. “Of course, you’re into that.”

You pulled away from his neck and grinned, “How do you feel about cat ears?”

Kakashi didn’t seem to find your idea as amusing as you did. “You wish.”

You hummed in amusement, loosening his tie and throwing it behind you somewhere. His jacket quickly followed, crumpling on the ground at the base of the front door, leaving Kakashi in only his open shirt and trousers.

Kakashi, sensing the unfair differences in dress, attempted to liberate you from your shirt, but you caught both of his wrists in your hands and pinned them against the door.

“I can’t touch you? That’s hardly fair,” he pouted, playfully tugging at your restraint.

You slipped a knee in between his legs and ground it up against his crotch. Kakashi gave a hoarse gasp and folded forward slightly. “This isn’t supposed to be fair, Kakashi. Was it fair that you didn’t tell me of your resignation in advance? This is a punishment, darling.”

Kakashi growled lightly. You knew how much he loved to touch you, which is exactly why you denied him the honour. You growled back at him and to your delight, he immediately submitted, baring his neck. You nipped at the newly presented flesh, trying to keep yourself from getting too close to mating mark territory.

Maybe one day he would wear your mating mark, but today was not that day.

“Come on,” you said, pulling him forward by the belt. “I think it’s time we move to the bedroom before someone complains about the banging on the front door.”

“Do you have to tug me by my trousers?” Kakashi asked, although he didn’t do anything to stop you.

“Hmm, you’re right, this would be much easier with a lead, and a collar, of course.” You grinned at him with heavily lidded eyed. “Would you like me to get you your very own collar, ‘kashi?”

You were just testing the waters with that particular kink. It would be easy for him to write it off as a joke, like the cat ears, but if he liked it…

Kakashi’s pale skin lit up in a brilliant pink. Well, that answered that question.  

“Figures. You’d look hot in a collar, puppy.”

“Shut up,” Kakashi mumbled weakly, still following you obediently.

On the way to the bedroom, Kakashi lost his shirt, his trousers, and his underwear, creating a trail of clothes to the bedroom like a strange R-rated version of Hansel and Gretel.

You entered your bedroom and flicked on the lights. Kakashi went to stand by the bed, seemingly waiting for your next instruction. Having a naked omega in your bedroom really was the best way to end a night.

Honestly, it was a shame you couldn’t have a naked Kakashi and naked Itachi here with you. That impossibility was far more tragic than your own untimely death.

“Now, what should I do for your punishment, Kakashi, hm?” you asked, tilting your head consideringly. “Should I replicate Makoto’s punishment? You seemed to enjoy that.”

You delicately rested your hands on his throat, teasing him with featherlight touches. Kakashi shuddered, and his eyes fluttered closed. You used both hands to complete the full collar effect around his neck, just as had been described in the Icha Icha book.

“It makes sense that you like collars, considering the amount of time you spend reading about Makoto wearing one. Is that why you like Icha Icha, Kakashi?”

“I told you, I read it for the story. It’s a masterpiece of—"

You gently applied a little more pressure to the sides of his neck and his weak argument went silent. You felt powerful watching him fold at your feet.

As much as asking him for his opinion on his punishment was a method of teasing him, you really did have to figure out what his punishment was going to be.

You hadn’t had much time to plan, and your flat was tragically empty of things like toys or bondage. You resolved to fix that if you ended up in this world, but that didn’t help you right now.

For anyone else, you might have considered just denying him pleasure while he pleasured you, but Kakashi was a service sub through and through. No, he wasn’t going to be allowed to touch you, but you weren’t going to touch him either. He needed to focus on his own pleasure, and just like that, the perfect idea sprang to mind.

“Get on the bed and present to me; I want to see that sopping hole of yours.”

You watched with rapt attention as Kakashi climbed onto your bed on all fours. He let his shoulders fall to the blanket and then, resting his weight on his shoulders, he reached behind him.

“That’s it,” you mumbled, almost drooling. “Show alpha that needy hole.”

Kakashi used his hands to bare his hole for you, holding it open for your scrutiny. And what pretty picture he made, just for you.

His hole was indeed sopping wet, glistening in the warm lighting as his fingers struggled to retain a grip on the slippery skin. His dick swung proudly downwards, framed by the A-line shape Kakashi had created with his thighs. It dribbled a few clear beads of precum onto your sheets, but the idea of having to grab a towel for your activities was quickly dismissed when you realised you couldn’t bare to take your eyes off your omega for even a second.

Kakashi’s muscles strained as he kept up the presenting position for you. Confidence practically oozed from every pore in his body, exemplified no better in the challenging grin he had on his face. Kakashi knew he was sexy, and he was willing to weaponize that against you as much as possible.

Once again, you were struck by how different he was from Itachi. Sex didn’t make Kakashi bashful, emotions did. Sex didn’t make him feel like a different person, it amplified his traits. Itachi had been the opposite in both.

Honestly, if an outsider had seen your two dimension choices, you wouldn’t have blamed them for assuming that two different people had been involved.

You sat on the edge of the bed and leant forward so that you face was eye height with his hole. It twitched under your scrutiny, and you couldn’t help but coo.

“What a pretty hole you have, omega.” You blew some cold air on it to watch it flinch. As it clenched, a drop of slick began to run down to his thighs. It was practically drooling for you, begging you to fill it with something.

Although the rest of Kakashi was very pretty indeed, his hole had to be one of his best features. Tragically, you hadn’t had much time to spend with it recently, with all the work you’d had to do. It was probably lonely without you, and that wouldn’t do.

Except… you studied it closely, noting the slight gape and softness that you didn’t expect. Maybe his hole hadn’t been as lonely as you’d thought, because he was far too stretched considering it had been more than a week.

Oh, you realised, smirking, big, bad, genius Kakashi had been touching himself. He had been lonely and horny as work kept you both apart, and he had decided to take matters into his own hands. You imagined him for a moment, splayed on the massive bed in his penthouse, one hand fucking himself and the other pressed over his mouth to keep himself from waking his dogs.

“Have you been lonely, Kakashi?” you asked, deciding to call him out on it.

“No?” You could hear the question in his voice; he didn’t know where you were going with this, and that made it sweeter.

“I only asked because, well,” -you paused for effect- “your hole is looking very ready right now. I wonder if perhaps you’ve been touching yourself without my permission.”

The pink flush crept down Kakashi’s back, and he turned to hide his face in your duvet; you’d caught him red handed.

“Ah, what a slutty puppy I have, hm?” Kakashi whined, and some more beads of pre cum splashed against the blanket. “Tell me, did you use a toy, or did you use your fingers?”

“Is that any of your business?”

“Kakashi…” you said, warning clear.

“…Fingers,” Kakashi said reluctantly, his voice muffled by your blanket. “I used my fingers.”

Perfect. “Show me.”

“What?”

“Show me how you fingered yourself, Kakashi. What position did you use? Show your alpha how you placated that slutty hole of yours.”

Hesitantly, Kakashi turned over so that he was laying on his back, legs splayed wide for your viewing pleasure. He then grabbed one of the decorative cushions and slotted it under his hips so that his hole was easier to reach. Kakashi held his lips between his teeth and brought a hand down so that his fingertips were resting on his hole.

“I did it like this…”

“I see,” you said, tilting your head at him. “And how many fingers did you use?”

“I started with one.”

You waved your hand at him to go ahead. “Show me how you did it.”

Kakashi slowly sunk his middle finger in, making an obscene squelching noise as he did. Clear fluid dripped out around his finger, and you were once again incredibly grateful for the immaculate horny imagery that the porn logic provided for you.

Idly, you wondered if he really had started with his middle finger, or if it was some kind of subtle ‘fuck you’. With Kakashi, you could never bee 100% sure.

He pumped the finger in a few times, obviously finding no resistance. His angry cock stood proudly, but Kakashi ignored it for the time being.

“But one finger didn’t satisfy you, did it? Your greedy hole needed more.”

Kakashi rolled his eyes but nodded, “I used two fingers next.” He didn’t need to be asked to show you this time, and his pointer finger soon joined his middle one.

Now he had two fingers, Kakashi picked up the pace and began periodically curling his fingers in search of that wonderful bundle of nerves. The wet noises increased, but Kakashi didn’t seem to be having much luck.

You watched as he got progressively more frustrated at his inability to find his prostate. He tried to hike his legs up further to get a better angle, but no luck. He tried switching hands, but it didn’t help at all. He even tried holding his breath at one point, just in case it had some kind of effect, but nothing.

His face scrunched up and he bared his teeth, but it wasn’t like his own body was going to somehow be intimidated into giving him what he wanted, so that didn’t work either.

You watched, baffled and slightly amused, as the wet patch underneath his hips grew larger and larger, completely soaking your decorative pillow, and yet Kakashi still couldn’t seem to get close to his orgasm.

For a moment, you wondered if something was wrong, before you realised what forces controlled the universe you were currently in. This was a punishment because Kakashi took an action without you. It only made narrative sense that he couldn’t find his own prostate and needed you to do it for him.

The lecherous grin that blossomed on your face would have likely scared more delicate omegas away.

You let him finger himself for almost ten minutes, at which point you could tell his hands were starting to cramp, and his face was bright red from exertion. His thighs were trembling, and he was sweating, but his release had escaped him the entire time.

You figured fifteen minutes of frustrating edging was enough punishment for now. You gently rested your hand on top on his, ceasing his frantic fingering. Carefully, you extracted his fingers with a wet plop. Kakashi whined, but you shushed him, putting his hand down on his stomach.

“It’s not going to happen on your own, darling, don’t you understand?” Kakashi peered up at you, panting. His eyes made it clear that he didn’t understand. “You need me to do it for you. I can make you feel so very good, but you need to learn to trust me. I know what you need, I can deliver what you need. You just” -you slipped two of your own fingers inside him- “need” -you pumped them slowly- “to trust” -you curled your fingers, immediately finding his swollen prostate with the power of porn logic- “me.” You pressed down on the bundle of nerves as hard as you could.

Kakashi gasped, his entire body lifting off the bed as he finally got a taste of the pleasure he had been desperately chasing. His cock was weeping, and you rolled his balls in your free hand, but stopped moving your fingers.

“Right there,” he panted, sounding close to tears. “Hit there again.”

You stared him down, pointedly not moving your fingers. “Why are you being punished, Kakashi?”

“What?!”

“Why are you being punished?” He glared at you, but you only raised an eyebrow at him, the same way he did to you so often when you first met.

“You’re playing this game now?” You refused to budge, and quickly, his desperation outweighed his pride. “Because I didn’t warn you that I was going to resign.”

“And why is that bad?”

Kakashi growled, “Because it concerned you and you deserved to know.”

“Apologise.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, voice desperate. He rocked his hips down on your fingers, muscles shaking. “I’m sorry, I won’t do it again, just please, get me off!”

It was hardly the most articulate or heartfelt of apologies, but you were happy to let it slide this time. You pumped your fingers in and out a few times and Kakashi relaxed. Now, you just had to curl your fingers just right, and— There!

You grinded your fingers into his prostate mercilessly. Kakashi’s eyes rolled backwards and the noise that escaped him was one of pure, toe curling, ecstasy.

“This feels better, doesn’t it, ‘kashi.” You didn’t phrase it as a question because you knew you were right. “That’s because I’m doing it. You’re so used to being the one in control, the one everyone comes to when they need help or advice, but deep down, you just want someone else to deal with everything, don’t you?”

Kakashi whined as you picked up the pace with your fingers. His prostate was so swollen that you caught it every time. When you used your other hand on his cock, his whine transitioned into an open-mouthed moan as Kakashi writhed on your bed.

You set a fast pace, but when you saw his balls tighten, you withdrew your hands completely. Kakashi thrashed in frustration, his swollen cock bobbing in the open air.

“Why’d you stop?” he asked, panting. His tongue was lolling out ever so slightly.

“Because you’re loose enough to take me now, Kakashi, why would I continue?” You maintained an innocent façade that Kakashi could obviously see through but couldn’t question. “Your punishment may be over, but my pleasure still outranks yours.”

Kakashi scoffed, but he was too far gone to successfully pretend that he was aching for your cock, so he remained quiet.

You decided it was time to strip. Your clothes were feeling a little tight in some key areas, and while the contrast between yours and Kakashi’s states of dress was sexy, you had had enough of wearing them.

Kakashi’s stare was red hot as it lingered on every piece of newly revealed skin, as your outfit was slowly shed. It was flattering how much pleasure he seemed to gain just from seeing you strip, and you couldn’t resist blowing him a little kiss as the final article of clothing fell to the floor. Like the utter dork he was, he mimed catching the kiss and then held that fist to his chest.

You crawled over him, giggling at his antics, as you settled in between his still splayed legs. You hummed, running your hands up and down his chest, your fingers catching on his pebbled nipples. “While this view is delectable, I was thinking about a slightly different position for the grand finale.”

“And what position would that be?”

With some difficultly, you pulled Kakashi up and slid yourself into his previous position, kicking the soaking cushion off the bed as you did. When you were finished, Kakashi was now the one hovering over you. You took advantage of your new position and stole a quick kiss from him.

“I think that it’s your turn to make me feel good,” you said, grabbing a hold of your cock and pumping it slowly. “How do you feel about riding me?”

You had a front row seat to the way Kakashi’s eyes dilated at your suggestion. He drew back, and his eyes flickered down to your dick. With obvious physical agreement, Kakashi straddled you, one knee either side of your hips, and replaced your hand with his own on your dick.

He sent you a sultry look, and then dragged the head of your dick back and forth against him, until the head caught of his loosened hole. Kakashi hovered there for a moment, until a drop of his slick ran down your dick.

“Tease me and I’ll edge you until you cry, Kakashi.”

He considered your challenge with a head tilt and eye smile. “If you say so.”

He slammed his hips down all at once, skin hitting skin with a wet slap. You choked at the sudden onslaught of sensations as his wet heat wrapped around you.

“Fuck, you are such a brat, you know that?”

“Me?” He put a hand against his chest in mock offence. “Never.” To emphasise his point, he drew his hips up until you almost slipped out, only to then drop his hips down all at once, again. 

“Just get to it, pretty, before I go soft from boredom.” That was entirely a bluff, of course; you were incredibly hard and that wasn’t changing any time soon.

Kakashi did as you’d asked. At first, the pace of his hips was fast, but not particularly rhythmic. His thighs were incredibly muscular and had no trouble holding his weight as he bounced up and down, but you could tell that he had never done this before, so you settled your hands on his hips to help him.

“You don’t have to go all the way off every time,” you explained, holding him still. “Here, try moving your hips backwards and forwards for a bit, like you’re grinding.”

Kakashi tried what you were explaining, and you could tell immediately that it felt better for him, because his face screwed up in pleasure as his slid backwards and forwards on your hips, painting them with his slick.

From that point onwards, he alternated between powerful up and down riding, and sensual rocking. He seemed to delight in avoiding a noticeable pattern, so you could never quite predict when he was going to switch between them.

His gooey insides were your favourite place to be regardless, so you let him play how he wanted to. To retain some of your power, you took to plucking at his nipples whenever his pace flagged. While it was probably incredibly rude to compare two omegas’ nipples, you couldn’t help it. Itachi did have cuter nipples, it had to be said, but Kakashi had better pecs, so it evened out.

Again, you desperately wished James would tell you who created these drop dead gorgeous omegas, but extracting information from her was worse than pulling teeth.

As Kakashi continued to ride you, the squelching was so loud that you were certain that at least one of your neighbours was cursing you right now. Or maybe they were into it; it was a porn world.

The rhythmic slapping felt like a countdown to your impending orgasm, as something burning bubbled underneath your skin. You loved being more sensitive in porn worlds, but it did make it harder to last.

Kakashi was getting more desperate, too. Although his thighs were starting to slow from exertion, he was relentless in his riding. He moaned unabashedly as your knot started to inflate and catch on his rim.

Your instincts screamed at you to knot him. You felt delirious with pleasure, and you needed this pretty omega to take your seed. You needed to mark him, so that no one else, no clients, no colleagues, and no board members, would ever even consider touching him again.

You looked up at Kakashi as he hovered above you. His skin shined in the light, although it had nothing on the way his slick shined against your skin. “Good boy, you’re such a good boy, Kakashi, my good boy.”

Kakashi seized, and with a cry, he shot white ropes of cum all over your stomach and chest, while clear liquid forced its way past your dick and out into the open air. With each shot, Kakashi’s insides tensed and pulsed, and you couldn’t hold on any longer.

You came too, knot locking into place inside him, as you painted his insides white. You came so hard that you almost blacked out. You were more used to the increased number of cum shots now, but it still felt insanely good to ride the high of a good 50 seconds of orgasm.

Kakashi slowly fell forward, breathing harshly, until his face was resting beside yours. He was making a valiant effort to keep the majority of his weight off you, but that wasn’t what you wanted.

“Come here,” you said, tugging him down until his entire weight was resting on you. “That’s it, I’ve got you, you don’t need to worry about stuff like that, remember?”

Kakashi chuckled tiredly, “If you insist.”

You pressed a loving kiss to the side of his head, basking in the after glow as you both waited for your knot to deflate.

“Thank you,” Kakashi muttered, pressing a kiss against your shoulder.

“For what?”

“For staying with me.”

Guilt spiked inside your chest as you remembered the choice you were to have to make.

And of course, right at that moment, your vision faded out from the edges, dousing your vision in black. When light bled back in, Kakashi was nowhere to be seen. James was there instead, and you were back to standing in the middle of the library. You swallowed heavily as your final moments with Kakashi swelled up inside you as grief and longing.

You felt pretty rough.

“Welcome back, human,” James said, sounding quieter than normal. Her voice wasn’t really soft, but it was what you imagined she believed that soft was.

“Thanks, James.” Wow, even your voice sounded rough.

Like last time, James reached out to tap you on the head, but unlike the relief that had followed when your emotions were supressed, this time only made you feel worse as all the emotions from Itachi’s pocket dimension came flooding back in too. It made you feel like you were wearing a head several sizes too small.

You took a deep breath and tried to compartmentalise as much of what you were feeling as you could.

“I know you must be feeling overwhelmed, human alpha, but I must remind you that you will kill us both, along with many others, if you do not make a fast decision on which pocket dimension you wish to use the rest of your life energy in.” She straightened out both books in front of you on the library table. ‘Potions and Magic and Sex, Oh My!’ was on your right, while ’50 Shades of Audacity’ sat on your left.

“Fuck, James, how am I supposed to choose?” You slumped into one of the library chairs and put your head in your hands.

“I know this must be a difficult choice human. You performed remarkably in both worlds, and I am certain that both omegas love you dearly.” Ugh, that did not make you feel any better. “However, one of them will feel right in a way that the other doesn’t. Use your instincts, human, I trust that they will not steer you wrong.”

Your instincts? It felt like they were in a mess. You felt conflicting messages flood through you as your instincts screamed at you for even considering leaving either omega. But you had to leave one of them.

You closed your eyes and allowed your instinctual reaction to guide you. It was a mess in your head, but you didn’t have time to untangle anything.

“When you’re ready, put your hand on the book that you wish to enter.”

“James?” You opened your eyes and stared down at the weird Curator that had been guiding you all this time.

“Yes, human alpha?”

“Thank you for everything,” you said earnestly, sending her a smile. “I’m going to miss you.”

James seemed taken aback, but she eventually returned your smile. “I will miss you too, human. I will request to be the Curator to meet you here after your life energy is gone, so that I may escort you onwards.”

“Thanks James.” You kind of felt like crying, but you couldn’t delay this anymore. “I think I’m ready.”

Quickly, so that you couldn’t agonise over changing your mind, you slapped your hand down on world that you wanted, and everything went dark.

Next chapter

[lure-of-writing]

Why can't we?

Authors Note: Oh My gosh guys, the love on part two was insane, truly thank you so much. It makes me so happy seeing all the comments and reposts it means the most to me. Part three is officially here and I am so excited for you to read it and I can't wait to see what you guys think about it. Without giving the ending away I would love to hear what you guys think about an alternative ending? Anyways if you have any request or ideas please send them in and again thank you all so much!

Summary: After leaving the night court you begin to find your place in your new life, that is until the night court comes to be directly in your home.

Word count: 4.0k

Warnings: Angst, arguing, (Let me know if I forgot any!)

Part one: Never been good enough

Part Two: Left in regret

Thesan was waiting for your arrival with the captain of the peregryn army in the common area of his home. They had been waiting no more for ten minutes until they heard the thundering of wings and watched as Kolos landed with you in his arms.

Kolos was second in command under his captain and a lifelong friend of yours. Having been raised alongside him you knew he would never pass judgment upon you and also provide the support you would undoubtedly need in the following weeks as you figured out how to put your life back together. You were born into the dawn court but had chosen to leave with the idea of being able to be used to your full potential as a spy and you did in fact find that in the night court but you had also never regretted a decision as much as you also loved the people you met and memories you made from that said decision. 

“Y/n welcome back home to the dawn court, we have missed you sincerely.” Thesan the living embodiment of calm energy welcomed you with open arms and a warm hug. “I assume all went well?” you could tell that the question was directed at Kolos “Yes they didn’t try to stop us but I think y/n has something very important to tell the two of you.” Without another word Thesan took a seat in a chair and motioned for everyone to do the same. “Azriel…Azriel is my mate.”  you watched with a baited breath for anyone to say anything and for a while no one did that was until your high lord spoke up. “And how do you feel about that?” 

“Well considering that he's in love with Elain, not very great. But I am not going to force either of us to be in a relationship that the other does not want. He was only apologetic because we are mates. If we weren’t he would have never chosen me.” In the week that you had been residing back in your home court you had kept all this information to yourself, unwilling or maybe even unable to accept the cards you had been dealt but to finally tell someone other the Kolos felt like lifting a weight off your chest. Like it was a start in the right direction to leaving the past and starting anew. 

“This is certainly unexpected information.” the captain spoke up “Yeah you’re telling me.” a breathy laugh fell from your lips as you glanced at your high lord waiting to see what he had to say. “I guess that means I can expect letters from Rhysand or maybe even a visit from the night court?” Thesan looked at you in question. “Oh no, I don’t think that will be happening. I made myself very clear to Azriel that I didn’t want to be his second choice or anything like that. If I haven’t been good enough for him in the almost five hundred years of knowing him then why would I suddenly be good enough now? I’m not interested in partaking in those mind games.” 

“Very well. I support whatever decision you make. Always.” you bowed your head in appreciation to the kind ruler. For as long as you remember Thesan has always been kind to you, always let you do as you wish and have control over your own life. He never offered any input unless asked and always listened with compassion while allowing you to figure out your own life, the least you could do is serve in his court to at least restart to repay him for all the care and compassion he has shown you in life. “Thesan? If you would allow it, I would be honored to serve in your court again, it's the least I can do to repay the kindness you have shown me.”  you could tell the captain was uneasy with your request and it made sense you had just come from the night court claiming Azriel as your mate and now wanted to serve in his lover's court. But truly you wanted nothing more than to leave behind the past and start building your new life in the dawn court. The court you were always supposed to be in. “It would be an honor to have you serve in my court.” 

Surprisingly it had been almost six months after leaving before the night court reached out to set up a meeting with you and the high lord but upon your request it was denied. You had finally settled into a routine not only within the court but within your own life and you had no plans of having any member of letting the night court interrupt that. “So how many more times do you think that they are going to send a letter before they get the hit?” Kolos sat at the kitchen table and watched as you made the both of them breakfast. “Honestly I don’t know. It's one thing in Rhysand is sending them himself but it's another if Azriel is asking him to send them. You know how Illyrians are, too stubborn for their own good.” Kolos couldn’t help but laugh at your statement for it held nothing but truth. “I suppose you are not wrong but what happens if there is a high lords meeting? You will be expected to attend.” The food was set before him as you moved to take the seat next to him. You placed you head on your head and smiled at him “It's a good thing I have my own personal warrior to protect me” 

During the first initial weeks you stayed in the court palace but soon after you moved into Kolos house. At first it was only because you would never pass up the opportunity to live with your friend, especially in the time of trying to move past your old life of the night court and what's a better idea then moving forwards with the support of a lifelong friend. As the six months came and went you found yourself becoming interested in Kolos and it was safe to say that the same could be said for him. The line that was becoming increasingly more blurred of friends and lovers had never been crossed but something told you that it would be very soon. 

You were at the daily meeting with Thesan and all of his other trusted advisors including Kolos when the announcement was made. “Rhysand has requested a high lords meeting, he also asks that it be held here.” there it was, the final card that you knew Rhysand had to play. Unlike most courts, Thesan had two emissaries, one was an older male and the other was you. He handled the day and night court while you handled the summer, spring, autumn and winter court. Theo, your counterpart, could not handle the likes of Berons offspring but unlike him nothing brought you more joy then the verbal sparring match that was bound to happen while dealing with Eris. Being in charge of the seasonal courts meant you had no idea what was happening with the other ones. Didn’t know it was escalating to the point of a high lords meeting being called but you also knew that when it came to Rhysands brothers he would stop at nothing to help them. 

You could feel everyone's eyes on you. Nobody knew the full reason as to why you had returned to the dawn court but your departure from the night court had piqued enough interest that the fae in the room were looking to you for the answer as to why Rhysand requested this meeting. You knew why but refused to acknowledge it. “And what exactly is the reason behind this meeting?” Kolos was quick to pull the attention away from yourself and onto him. “He wants to see how everyone is doing after the war and talk over next moves.” you watched as Thesan weighed his options. “Very well, the same rules apply as last time.”

The date of the meeting had been set for three months after the letter had been read, as it was to ensure each court would be able to attend despite their excuses. You had spent the morning getting ready trying to fight off the nerves of having to see your old family again when Kolos decided that he had enough of watching you fight the thoughts running loose in your head. Leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed he simply watched for a minute as you perfected your makeup. “You do know that if Azriel tries anything I will kick his ass.” startled you look through the mirror to meet his eyes. “You also do know that the last time there was a high lord meeting that he was able to get through the barriers? I mean you were there.” Kolos simply gave you a shrug and a sly smile before taking in your outfit. A beautiful dress adored your body, it was a soft blush orange color as if to mimic the color of the sunrise. The top of the dress was a v-neck that stopped just below the sternum with straps on the top that started on one side wrapped around your neck and connected to the other side as if to make an x on your chest. The sleeves see through and flowy while the bottom of your dress had two hip high slits on each side of your hips. The whole dress was stunning. 

Kolos knew that the dress you picked out was nothing out of your usual attire but after seeing you in night court clothes for so long it was nothing short of breathtaking to see you in dawn court attire, and it didn’t help that your dress was fit for a queen. As much as he would love to sit here and drink in your beauty for as long as you would let him, Thesan wouldn’t be pleased if you were last to the meeting that was being hosted in his court mostly for the reason of your old personal matters. So without another word said he ushered you to the door and from there you winnowed to the court palace. 

Ryhsand was fashionably late as always but of course not without letting his shadowsinger and general making sure it was safe first. You watched from afar as he appeared from thin air and assessed that it was safe for his high lord and lady. Soon after the inner circle appeared before your very eyes. You watched as they took their seats across from where you were sat at the side of Kolos. Thesan was in the middle and to the right of him was his captain and to his right was Kolos and at his side was you. It was a safe bet to make that they were surprised to see you on the side of warriors and not the side where the other important court members sat. 

You felt as if Azriel tried to catch your eyes but you refused to give him that satisfaction so instead you focused on watching all those in the room except the night court. “I forgot to tell you that you look stunning by the way.” Kolos had leaned over to whisper into your ear and intern place himself just mere inches from your face. “I see what you’re playing at but thank you.” you whispered back as you felt Azriel stare weigh on your body. “I’m not playing at anything, I simply forgot to compliment you earlier and thought I should do it before the chaos ensues.” 

From the moment Azriel arrived his eyes couldn’t leave your body. They assessed you from head to toe to make sure you were ok before taking in your outfit. The night court attire looked good on you but he hates to admit the dawn court was devastatingly beautiful. He took in every part of your exposed skin and wished he could keep the eyes of every male and female off of you so that nobody got the idea of approaching you. 

Azriel knew that you were avoiding making eye contact with him and anyone else from the inner circle and he would be lying if he said it didn’t hurt but he also knew he was to blame. But nine months had passed since he seen you last and he wanted nothing more than to sit down and be able to explain everything, to beg for your forgiveness and make the mating bond work. In those first six months Azriel sent letter after letter along with Rhysand pleading for you to come back and just talk to him but eventually he realized you wouldn’t so he asked Rhysand to call this meeting in hopes that he would get a moment alone with you to tell you everything he needed to say. 

What Azriel didn’t account for was for you to be seated directly next to the random man he saw when you had come back to the house of wind to collect your belongings. He also didn’t account for the said random man to put his face so close to yours that if you moved you would be kissing. Azriel watched as the man whispered something in your ear and you turned to face him with a light blush now coloring your cheeks and soft smile gracing your features and before he knew it he was in between the two of you.

“Don’t ever get that close to my mate again.” Azriels words were thinly veiled with a promise of a threat. “Who is to say that she is your mate shadowsinger? As far as I knew you were with the middle Archeron sister. What was her name again? Ella? No…it’s Elain right?” Kolos knew that he was dancing on the edge of a fine line when it came to upsetting Azriel but he also knew that he was a warrior in his own right and could also handle his own if it came down to a fight. 

It was as if you had been watching everything happen in slow motion. From Kolos complimenting you to Azriel appearing right before you and now them bickering. Snapping out from the haze you were in you grabbed Azriels arm marched him back over to the night court and demanded that Rhysand winnow you to the river house.  

“What the hell were you thinking?” you yelled at your so-called mate. Without another thought you stalked up to Azriel and started pushing an accusing finger into his chest. “What made you think you had the right to do that! In front of the other courts also? Are you out of your mind?” Azriel had nothing to say, he had never seen you this mad, not even when you were yelling at him about Elain. He could see the redness creep up your neck and slowly take over your face, he watched as the rage built behind your eyes. Backing away from him you turn to look at the rest of the group and spot Elain sitting in the corner holding nyx. The person who started this all. You leveled her a glare before turning your attention back to the man who decided to play hero when it wasn’t necessary. 

“Do you really think I needed you to come to my rescue like some damsel in distress? I know that this might be new news to you but I am no such thing and have never needed your rescuing, especially not now. That man you decided to threaten was Kolos, my childhood best friend for your information since you seem to think he's some sort of threat to my life. He will never be someone I need saved from. You on the other hand, well the same can’t be said for you.”  

“I know you don’t need me to save you but y/n, that man could have kissed you if he had leaned forward. Please try to see that from my point of view. He may be a childhood friend of yours but you are my mate and I can’t just allow another male around you like that.” If you weren’t mad before then now you were livid. How dare he talk about someone being close enough to kiss you when the whole inner circle knew that he and Elain were doing much worse. “Let's get one thing clear, Azriel, I may be your mate but I do not want this bond. I refuse to let myself fall into a relationship where I am only wanted because the bond makes you want me. So if I want another male to kiss me then that is my decision only, you will have no input.” Once again you were face to face with Azirel, anger radiating from your very body. “You want me to look at that situation from your point of view? Ok Azriel, then let's look at you and Elain from my point of view shall we? How about all those times when she purposefully pushed herself into you or the times when she would need “extra” help with something as simple as stretching or when you two would sit and whisper to each other at family dinners. You also could have kissed her if you happened to move any closer. Plus let's not act like you two are innocent, everyone here knows what you two did behind closed doors. Oh and one last thing Azirel you do not allow who gets to be around me. You never have and you never will.”  

Through the mating bond Azriel could feel your resentment not only towards him but also the situation and it was the first time the spy master could truly say he was feeling panicked. Azriel knew he had made a grave mistake but he also knew that he would have never even looked in Elains direction if he knew about the mating bond. If only you could see that he would spend the rest of his life apologizing for the pain he caused you if you would let him close enough to do so. He just had to get you to understand how sorry he was. 

Rhysand could see that the situation was escalating on your part and that Azriel needed a minute to think of how to approach you so he tried to step in and help. “Y/n I know that you are upset with Azriel, but I think you need to step back from the situation and take a moment to calm down.” Rhysand may be a high lord but the pure hostility coming from you could rival his own power and deep down he knew he made a mistake interjecting. 

“I need to calm down Rhysand? That's hilarious coming from you, I mean I do remember you being willing to kill Tamlin with your own bare hands for what he did to feyre. But I need to calm down? Alright.” Turning back around to deal with Azriel you found him on his knees before you. “Y/n I know that I fucked up. I know that I should have realized sooner that you had feelings for me because that is my job as spymaster to be aware of the slightest things and I am sorry that I failed to see that, but you have to understand, if I had known about the bond I would have never even looked in Elains direction. I know I can’t control who's around you but you have to understand I just want to keep you safe. And I know that Elain and I aren’t innocent but I will spend the rest of eternity making it up to you, you just have to let me.”

For a second all you could do is stare down at Azriel and feel his sorrow through the bond. And for a second you wanted to forgive him but deep down you knew that this moment would be something you could never let go, never get past. You knew that Azirel could spend the next thousand years apologizing but some part of you would never be able to fully trust him. And the realization broke your heart but you knew you also owed it to yourself to never be treated this way no matter the circumstance. A heartbeat later you knew the choice you had to make. 

“Azriel, get up.” He had never heard your voice so dejected before and he knew something was wrong. “ I do not care that you were with Elain. Did it make me happy? No. but you were also with her before I knew about the bond so I guess it doesn’t matter but what does matter is that up until that point I had spent hundreds of years showing you my love with no acknowledgement ever but suddenly this “wholesome” human girl appeared ,who was afraid of fae mind you, and you were infatuated with her as if she hung the moon and the stars. What I do care about is that if it weren’t for the bond we share you would have never considered picking me instead of her, would have never looked my way. I mean hell you forgot me on the battlefield because Elain needed you.” 

The inner circle watched as you took a frustrated breath in while trying to collect your emotions and they held their breaths also while waiting for you to say something else. “I have wanted a mate for as long as I knew about their existence and as much as I want to have this with you Azriel I can’t. There will always be a piece of me that can’t let this go. You could spend forever apologizing but I will never be able to fully accept it, and neither of us deserve that. I deserve to never be anything but the only choice and you deserve to be with someone who doesn’t have an ounce of resentment in their heart towards you. So no, I can’t do this.” 

“Why can’t you see that I am picking you! I want you! I want this bond, I want this relationship!  If this is what you want and it's what I want, why can’t we make this work? I would rather have you and you be mad at me for the pain I’ve caused you then to not have you at all. I will grovel at your feet until you see that I want this, if that's what I have to. I will do anything. Please…please just let's at least try.” Azirel had never felt so many conflicting emotions at once. Anger, heartbreak, nerves. You name it he's experiencing it waiting for your response. 

“I’m…. I am so sorry Azriel. I can’t. At least not right now. I need time to process and to heal. I need time away from you and this and the whole situation. I need to find the version of me that is not the one who would do anything for an ounce of your attention. I am not saying no for forever but for now I am and for however long else I need. I won’t do anything to the bond but please don’t send me your emotions. I need to sort mine out without trying to figure out yours also. I do not know how long it will take but maybe someday in the future we can try again.” 

With the permission from Thesan, Kolos winnowed to the river house to make sure you were ok and to bring you back from the night court. What he wasn’t expecting to find was Azriel on his knees before pleading for your forgiveness. He watched from afar as you explained why the mating bond couldn’t be. He disregarded Azriels form as you turned away from him and walked towards himself. Kolos wasn’t sure how you knew he was there considering you never once looked away from Azriel until you walked away but without any words needed he took your hand and winnowed away back to the dawn court to begin your healing.

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