#I fell asleep trying to write my thoughts while they were still fresh

[sunshineandlyrics]

I saw "LouisTom" aka 'All Of Those Voices' this evening. Just a mix of thoughts which contain some SPOILERS ..

I haven't been to the movie theatre for about 2 years. The last movie I saw was either Parasite or Mulan live action. Only Louis could entice me back to sit in a public room surrounded by strangers for over an hour.

I really loved the behind the scenes in the studio, Louis talking about music and sharing FITF with his band, and all the interactions with his team. Lottie's comments shows how much she admires and loves Louis. The more you hear about Louis, the more you admire him.

The parts when Louis was talking about his Mum, and around Louis performing Just Hold On on the Xfactor were really hard for me. And Grandpa bless his heart.

Theo Hutchcraft really looks like a cool Vampire.

Oli is a gem. The most understanding friend and goofball mate anyone could ever want. I get why Louis has Oli with him all the time.

Mark Tomlinson quoted Louis saying something of an epiphany while during his Grease days (which reminded me of the Vanessa Hudgens' Austin Butler/Elvis epiphany).

One of my favourite moments was of Louis with his team on the yacht. The beautiful visuals, the chill, seeing some of the food, the band sharing their thoughts about Louis.

I heard Oli and Chris Frewin talking full sentences for the first time, and Oli's voice is not as I imagined and I understood him easier than I do Louis.

Louis has had to overcome his emotions and outside obstacles over his entire career. The documentary shows us the bumpy ride, from getting picked on Xfactor but dismissed and feeling insignificant, then overcoming that by contributing with his songwriting. He was shattered by the break, feeling lost on his career path, the family tragedies, then it's years to make his debut album, only for his tour to be hit by Covid, then tour starts again and his career is eventually on a roll. We already know the history but it's seen with some new insights. His Mum truly raised a man of good character.

The teary eyes didn't make me emotional for a few reasons and didn't make me change my mind because I've been here from the start of this stunt. Louis could've spent so much time between 2016-now (like during XFactor Judges), and especially during the lockdown with the kid but he didn't. Not even the dangerous Californian bushfires inspired Louis to visit the kid, and his team was like no comment on an article.

The scenes with the kid were cute but a bit awkward, and it raised more questions for me. Like why is Oli ALWAYS with them? Why didn't his family travel to America to see him more often if they miss him? Why does he hardly visit the UK, and only for the last 2 Christmases and the only clue of it was via the same pic we saw already posted by one of the sisters? Why is there a lack of unseens of Louis or his family with the kid from between 2016-2021? And the only baby pics were the ones taken in 2016 and already overused in the tabloids.

And my Dude, if 'it gets harder to leave the kid every time' and you get teary eyed talking about it, you should've gotten a lawyer to get full custody, or at least 50/50 years ago. Why does Louis need to travel 20 hours each time to LA for such little time with his own child? Also why none of his American family were with him backstage after the LA concert, just this other kid friend and a guardian (and remember the 'grandparents' and 'uncle' were there but sat separately from him, and potentially had to buy their own tickets to the concert).

It's funny hearing Louis being called both Lou-ee and Lew-is (Doncaster v non Doncaster people).

Given the amount of time I saw Oli and Louis spend with the kid and how they both interacted with him, it would not surprise me if it was later revealed that Oli was the Dad. That would explain why Oli hasn't spend more time in America with him, how the child hardly visits his family in the UK, why he hasn't hired a lawyer for better custody arrangements, because remember people, Oli's only on a PA's salary. And what the hell was that place Louis and Oli were supposedly staying at with the kid. Total opposite of the infinity pool house.

And after I heard Charlie talk twice about the filming having been organic, natural, not set up, etc and watching the 2 sections of the stunt in the docu, it just felt the opposite. Charlie was definitely trolling when he said that. And honestly for me, if these sections with the kid weren't in the film, it would not have been missed because Louis' own grandparents, siblings and childhood friends confirmed to us Louis' love for family and his personal journey. It defiantly felt like filming the kid was an afterthought, rather than preplanned or in the vision Louis or Charlie had in 2019.

Sadly no new insights about either broken arm incidents, no Louis hair and skincare discussions with Krystle, no fashion discussions with Helen, and no Clifford.

They celebrated Steve's birthday too hard in Iceland. His band is funny especially Matt. Mark Gillespie was seen backstage at Louis' LA show.

Familiar frequent flyer 'fans' were interviewed.

Louis loves his Louies, and his whole team appreciate us too.

There was only English subtitles for us. No local language because it was probably not worth translating for a limited screening that could only be used in 1 country.

I left feeling exhausted and heavy hearted seeing his journey, and very proud of Louis for how he kept going to where he is now, and how he has stayed a sweet person, and happy seeing he is surrounded by good people now. It's clear that Louis is loved and respected by those closest to him. As a One Direction fan and Louie, I enjoyed and appreciated this documentary.

This documentary is about a journey, and not a blockbuster, exposé film.

Now I feel so super ready for the tour to start because seeing Louis in concert again makes me miss those loud and fun times.

And remember, Louis is only getting started ...

(22 March 2023)

[makeyoumine69]

Hi Lexi! I have to say that I wasn't even into Patrick Bateman before I started reading your works, but now I'm completely hooked! If you would allow me to ask you one small thing, I would be so happy! Could you please write some spicy somnophilia with Patrick? Excuse me my English! It's not my native language! Anyway, I hope you're in high spirits and wish you all the best! Keep cooking, Queen!😘

In The Air Tonight

PAIRING: Patrick Bateman x fem!Reader

CW: Smut, somnophilia, orgasm denial (kinda), mutual hand job, unprotected vaginal sex, spanking, finger sucking, dirty talk, pet names, touch starved Patrick.

SONG REC: Phil Collins — In The Air Tonight

A/N: Hello my dear anon! Thank you so much for all the kind words, I really appreciate them! I hope you'll enjoy this little writing.

That night, after an unpleasant conversation with Bateman that bordered on an argument, you couldn't really sleep. And the fact that he was gone, leaving you alone in his lavish apartment, didn't help, but you managed to convince yourself that you wouldn't stay up late waiting for him to return. Even if he didn't get back until morning, you wouldn't care—or at least you forced yourself to believe that you wouldn't. Eventually you fell asleep with a smile on your face, dreaming about how Patrick would try to justify where he had been all night.

The fresh night breeze sipping through the bedroom blinds tickled your exposed skin as you slept uncovered, and while Bateman always had to put a blanket on you every night, tonight you slept alone and his big bed seemed so strangely cold. A soft, barely audible click echoed through the hallway as someone unlocked the front door, and the next moment the owner of the apartment crossed the threshold, moving as subtly as a cat—you didn't have a chance to notice his presence.

With slow, precise steps, Patrick walked past the living room, only to stop in the doorway to his bedroom to see your motionless, sleeping form; his hazel eyes took in the sight of the beautiful curve of your hips, and then, as you suddenly rolled onto your stomach, your ass was on full display for him to admire, and the man couldn't help but gasp, his hands instinctively fixing his red tie, which he then had to loosen.

Just when he thought he had the situation under control, you made a small, sexy sound that was something between a moan and a sigh, and even though it was quiet, Bateman still managed to hear it, and he was not very happy about it.

Cursing to himself, he pulled himself away from the doorjamb, brushing his hair back, not even noticing that his free hand was already busy undoing his clothes. First Patrick unbuttoned his navy blue shirt, the cotton material smooth under his fingertips, then he moved closer to the bed, kneeling down on it with precise caution, because he didn't want to wake you. Not yet.

Hugging the pillow, you were completely unaware of what was happening, even as the man lay next to you and his large palm slid down your cheek, you only sighed in response, almost nudging into his touch.

"God, you look so sweet like that," Bateman crooned, continuing to caress your face, his thumb sliding gently down to your lips, tracing their outline. "So peaceful."

Sniffing sleepily, you suddenly felt a lingering touch slide down your spine as you rolled onto your side. Then the touch became more deliberate and demanding, descending to your lower back, then to the hem of your nightgown, only to lift it up and spread your legs, teasing your delicate pussy lips. Half awake, you stifled a moan from the knotting sensation that was pooling down your lower body, Patrick's thumb flicking around your sensitive little bud feeling almost electric. The man couldn't hide his excitement at the way your body was responding even though you were unconscious, that notion made his cock twitch and spurred him to unzip his Armani pants in one impatient motion.

"Patrick," you murmured suddenly, still half asleep. "Is that you? You…came back?"

Bateman chuckled with amusement. "Of course it's me," he chanted in response, and before you could even react, the man grabbed your hand and placed it on his engorged dick, forcing you to stroke it. "Who else could it be? Were you thinking of someone else, darling?" His question caught you off guard, adding to the overwhelming sensations of his soft finger pads playing with your swollen clit.

Without really caring if you answered, Patrick repositioned his thumb, plunging it into your mouth to slide it along your wet tongue, making you taste yourself. Whimpering around his finger, you let him use your hand the way he wanted, the friction of his thick cock along the soft skin of your palm driving him crazy, but he tried his best to prolong this moment before he could finally fuck you senseless.

"Just you…" you bubbled breathlessly after licking his thumb. "All I could think about… was you… how I was going to slap your face when you got back!"

Bateman felt the warmth grow between his legs as he pressed his hard cock firmly against your soaking cunt, grinding it between your thighs, he could feel your legs tense under the silky fabric of your nightgown. "You can try," his grip on your waist tightened as he pulled you closer, his veiny shaft sliding back and forth between your soaped pussy lips, its tip teasing your clit with each slow stroke. "But first… I'm going to fuck you."

Never waiting for any kind of confirmation or consent, Bateman slammed his cock into you with a powerful, brutal thrust, burying himself deep inside your blushing cleft. The man let out a low, guttural moan as he felt your tightness envelop him, his fingers digging harder into your waist.

"Fuck… so tight…" his voice was strained with lust as he immediately began to move, thrusting into you hard and fast, his cock stretching your inner walls painfully. "I missed this."

The only sounds in the room were the creaking of the bed and the wet, slick sound of Patrick's cock driving in and out of you; his breaths came in ragged gasps as he continued to fuck you mercilessly, his fingers squeezing your hips tighter and tighter, enough to leave bruises.

At one point you had to grab the pillow for support, but Bateman had other plans, his large palms finding yours so quickly. Without any resistance from your side, the man pinned your wrists to the bed with one hand, the smooth metal of his Rolex sliding along your hot skin.

"I…" you hiccupped as he suddenly rolled his hips against yours, the curve of his dick hitting all the right spots inside of you, coaxing your pussy to clench around him. "I'm gonna cum."

To your surprise, instead of saying something mocking or taunting, Bateman just briefly nibbled your craned neck, picking up the pace, holding you as close as he could. When you closed your eyes, you were literally melting in his arms, at his mercy, your body was like the musical instrument, and he was the perfect musician, knowing exactly where to push and pull.

"Patrick…mhm…s-so close!" You instinctively tried to free your hands as you couldn't really control your body, but he held you too tightly. "So…fucking close!"

Hearing your desperate moans, the man stopped moving. "Hang on," he whispered suddenly, pulling out of you, leaving you empty and teetering on the edge, but never really falling over. "I have a better idea."

With that, Patrick shifted his position to kneel on the bed, the moonlight outlining his chiseled frame, leaving shadows on the wall that made him look even more mysterious. But you didn't really have time to admire this scene as he positioned you on all fours, his strong hands already wrapped around your waist.

"'C'mon, honey," the man husked, brushing his messy bangs from his sweaty forehead. "I wanna see you fucking yourself on my dick," he kneaded your ass gently, almost lovingly, before delivering a hard slap. "Use my cock darling, don't be shy."

The way he talked, the way he groped every little curve of your body, it was intoxicating, it was overwhelming, you were literally afraid to pass out at any second if he continued to torture you like this.

"God, you're such an asshole, Bateman," you scoffed before letting out a loud whimper as your bodies connected again, but this angel struck differently, forcing your inner channel to encase his dick like a tight glove. "Fuck…" you cursed again, rocking back and forth, his dick thrusting in and out of your soaked cunt so deliciously you swore you could see stars before your eyes. "You…I h-hate you!"

Grinning, Patrick pulled up the hem of your nightgown and left it folded at your waist, wanting to have the full picture of the way you were taking him. Every jiggle of your ass, your pussy so wet and stretched out to accommodate his huge size. Perfect. You were so fucking perfect, but he couldn't allow himself to admit it.

"Faster," Bateman moaned through clenched teeth, clasping his hands behind the back of his head and bucking his hips against yours. "Damn...you moan like a bitch in the heat...and your voice sounds so fucking cute when you curse like that."

No way you would respond to his cheesy provocations. Not now, when you were so close to your exquisite orgasm. This bastard could say whatever he wanted, you wouldn't even mind him being arrogant about his "magical" ability to make you cum so quickly. You didn't care because in the end you would be satisfied.

The obscene, almost grotesque sound of flesh slapping against flesh was hypnotic, your labored panting and his low groaning, your "sweet" curses mixing with his little praises. When you finally let yourself go and put your hand between your legs to rub your feverish clit, you almost bite the pillow under your sweaty body. This delirious sensation, rippling through every little part of your body, setting every nerve ending on fire—well, for that you could even forgive Patrick for being a dork.

P.S. Thank you for reading until the end! You can follow my side blog @makeyoumineagain and my amazing co-writer @iron-flavored-lipgloss and turn on notifications to know when we update!

[venerawrites]

Heyyyyyyy saw you're ask was open and jumped with joy!!!!

I have a request; for how Viktor or Jinx would react to reader fainting from exhaustion!, angsty and fluffy!!..love you're stuff ❤️❤️❤️

author's note: oh my, you are so sweet, thank you! This was such an interesting request to write and also my first one for Jinx, so I really hope you like it and I did your expectations justice! Thank you for requesting! <3

➤ Viktor

Working late side by side was not an unusual occurrence for you and Viktor. You often found yourselves in the lab way past closing hours and you even fell asleep on the corner sofa on numerous occasions.

While you were used to hard work, your recent project on trying to find a way for the Hexcore to react with organic matter has really taken its toll on you. You and Viktor spend hours experimenting, without a break and barely eating any food during the day.

Being completely engrossed in his work, it did take a few days (and maybe a small comment from Jayce) for Viktor to notice your malnourished look - the dark bags under your eyes, the unusual greyish colour of your skin

He tried everything to make you stop your work on the project - from trying to convince you to stay at home and proposing for him to take a few days break with you, to actually having arguments day after day about how he doesn't want you to experiment on the Hexcore anymore and he is giving it up altogether.

Being even more stubborn than him, you refused to abandon your work, knowing how high the stakes were. And this is how one day, after another long day, you felt you were almost there when suddenly everything went blurry and you felt yourself falling back...

Viktor was on his way back from a meeting with Jayce when he felt some nagging feeling at the pit of his stomach. He was not one to be superficial or anything, but deep down he knew something was wrong.

Once he opened the door and found you laying next to your desk, a trail of blood coming from the side of your head, forming a little pool on the ground, he felt his whole breath being taken away.

In his rush to get to you, he threw away his crutch, limping a few steps, before falling on his knees. Not giving up, he crawled to your unconscious form on his knees, cradling you in his lap once he was in an arm's reach.

"No, no, please! Wake up!", he shook your form, before lifting his head toward the door, "Help! Somebody help! Please!"

Luckily for him, Jayce and some of the enforcers were still on the same floor and once they heard his distressed calls, they immediately ran toward your lab and brought you to the hospital.

Viktor is a gentle and kind man, who loves you more than anything in his world, but he does have a problem expressing his thoughts and fears. So while he was crazy worried about your health, despite all the promises from the nurses that you are going to be fine, he felt a rising mix of frustration and annoyance bubbling inside of him. Why can't you just listen to him for once?

After you woke up a few hours later, he was happy to see you finally conscious, but even that did not save you from the long lecture he gave you about how you never listen to him, how you don't care about your health, and how Hexcore has brought nothing, but pain and issues for you.

He then exits the room for a few hours and while he remains in the hospital, he uses the opportunity to get some fresh air and gather his thoughts. He knows he sounded harsher than intended, but he just didn't know how to word his worry for you.

You were released the next day and instructed to stay home, and while you tried to convince Viktor that you were fit to go back to work, he was having none of it. He took you straight home and he took a few days off himself, so he can take care of you.

He never apologized for his sharp words in the hospital, but you knew how sorry he was based on the way he was treating you, getting you everything you asked for, cooking you dinner, and doing all the chores, despite being in a poor health himself.

He will try to keep your mind busy by organising "book dates" on the sofa, where you read to each other, or by competing with you while playing board/card games (he totally let's you win, by the way.)

Please don't be mad because he is not good with words - he loves you more than his own life, which is why he is set to give up on the Hexcore project once and for all after seeing what it did to you.

➤ Jinx

Keeping up with Jinx was a tiring task - the young woman had such high energy, that she was hyperactive a good 80% of the time. She was always running around, making different trinkets or weapons, or drawing on the buildings of Zaun.

You, on the other hand, were more relaxed and laid-back. It's not like you were in bed all day, but you didn't like to be rushed, neither you liked to be always on the move. If anything, you preferred to spend your time cuddled next to Jinx after a long day of work, rather than run around the Undercity.

But life has been difficult for both of you recently since Violet came back and the blue-haired girl needed you more than ever. While she tried to act normal around you, you could hear her mumbling stuff about her sister in her sleep and when you were out together, she kept looking around, almost paranoid.

You tried to support her in the best way you knew how - with physical affection and also being glued to her side 24/7. She did have abandonment issues and she never liked to be left alone, but recently she was extra clingy around you.

Her energetic lifestyle, however, proved to be a bite too big for you to chew, and only after 2 days of spending your time only with her and accompanying her on her little 'missions', you felt absolutely exhausted. Not only you couldn't get more than a few hours of sleep each night, but you also barely had the time to eat, as you were constantly on the move.

Too engrossed in her attempts to run away from her memories, she didn't notice how you were becoming weaker and weaker in front of your eyes. So when one day she came back home, ready to give you a piece of her mind for leaving her waiting for you for over an hour, she was shocked to find you passed out on her desk, completely unconscious.

Many emotions passed through her at that moment - fear, confusion, disbelief - and for a while, she just stood frozen in place, looking at you with wide eyes. Cautiously, she walked next to you and tried to shake your shoulders gently.

"Bam-Bam, are you asleep? Hello?", her shakes got more energetic with every second of you not responding, "Shit! Bam-Bam! Please be okay, please be okay..."

Despite looking pretty short and slim, Jinx has always been pretty strong, especially with her hands. Scooping you in her arms, she quickly made her way to Silco's office, unsure where else to go. She knew that he was somewhat reserved when it came to your relationship, but at the moment he was the closest and the most convenient option.

Practically barging into his office and not bothered at all by the fact that he was in a meeting with Sevika, she laid you on the couch and started rambling about what your plans for the day were and all the events that happened since the morning till the moment she found you on the floor.

Luckily for her, Sevika has dealt with many people who have fainted from exhaustion before (mainly Shimmer workers). After checking your breathing and pulse, she picked you up and decided to move you to one of the free bedrooms on the floor so you could rest.

Of course, Jinx did not want to leave your side, but as she tried to follow the older woman, she was stopped by Silco who claimed you need some time by yourself, so you could rest and that he would have someone checking on you periodically.

She was furious - she wanted to be by your side and she didn't like that she was being kept away. What would you think once you woke up and she was not there? So while initially she agreed to let you rest, the moment Silco left "The Last Drop" for business, she immediately ran to the room she was in.

You woke up a few hours later only to find her trembling on the chair next to you, bouncing her knee up and down with rapid speed, while her head was buried in her hands. Blue hair was sticking out from her braids in every direction, while her nails were digging almost painfully into her scalp. Once she heard her name falling weakly out of your lips, she jumped from the chair and circled her hands around you, prepping your face with small kisses. She kept apologizing for not taking care of you, for not noticing how exhausted you had been for the past few days, and promising she would be better for you, as long as you don't leave her.

For the next few days she stayed glued to your side, insisting she needed to help you eat, change, and shower, and every time Sevika or Silco tried to pull her away, she would get both angry and upset. Eventually, they just let her do whatever she wanted, while also making sure you were recovering well.

Despite Jinx denying it, you knew her mind was partly occupied by Vi and her presence in Zaun. You tried to convince her that everything was going to be okay and that you would help her find her sister, but every time she just shook her head, saying that the only person she cared about was you. Deep down, she did blame Vi for what happened to you - if she hadn't decided to randomly pop in the Undercity after so many years, she wouldn't be so stressed and shocked, and you would've been fine.

Jinx becomes even more clingy with you after this and she will nag you to eat, drink, and rest all the time (despite not doing it herself). This girl loves you and while she can't really change who she is, she will try her best to slow down, take a breath and enjoy her time with you without the constant rush and adrenaline.

cc artwork: Max Suleimanov

[noellefan101]

Stealing Their Hoodie-Genshin

Characters: Tighnari, Wanderer/Scaramouche, Cyno, Xiao, Albedo x gn! reader

Summary: You steal his hoodie, what do you think abt it + what do they think abt it

Warnings: established relationship, modern au(i guess), you´re shorter than him, studying(albedo)

Note: i really hope you like this. it was honestly a pain to write three fics in a row, but i´m still alive i guess(if i don´t post in the next week im dead). also, i´m changing my theme a little, luv you.

Tighnari

you really wanted to try out his hoodie, he always wears it and it looked really comfy. you just didn´t know if he would get mad if you tried it on. it was his favorite hoodie and you didn´t want to make him mad if he didn´t like you wearing it/I'd say he´s really scary when he´s mad, like a mad mom kinda scary/. anyway, when you put it on you really didn´t want to take it off, it was just soooo comfy, and warm, and soft, and big, and... you get it. you were so lost in the comfiness and the smell of his perfume, that you didn´t realize someone just came home. yeah, unfortunately you were caught. at least he wasn´t mad, well... maybe a little, but that was mainly because you could´ve just asked instead.

one of the last things he wants you to be is a thief, just ask next time.

Wanderer/Scaramouche

he looked so good in it, you wanted to try it too. but the only problem was, that your boyfriend had a lot of temper. and you didn´t know if he would react badly/or just kill you on the spot/so you thought about asking, but got scared of the thought immediately. so the day of the week he wasn´t home you went for it, and you found it and tried it on. just as you thought, it looked really pretty on you. and it was really comfy too. the only thing that was wrong, he was coming home early as a surprise, and of course he didn´t tell you(ofc you didn´t its a f*''*ing surprise, why tf did i write that). but i guess he surprised you more than he thought, because he also surprised himself. he may have tried to ignore it, but you could clearly tell he noticed by his light red cheeks. but it was only because you looked really good in it.

he´ll be surprising you a lot more, to reveal all your secrets.

Cyno

his cloak from the manga as a hoodie omg give. me. one... 'cough cough' anyway, you really liked this one hoodie he had, why it was reeeaally big and looked oh-so-comfy. you really wanted to try it out, but you didn´t know how he would react if you asked. and you were kinda scared of it. sure he was not as scary around you, but you hadn´t done anything like this before, so how would you know how he would be if you did. sooooo you decided to "borrow" one of his hoodies while he was out. and, just as you thought, it was really comfortable and really big on you too, and as a bonus, it smelled like him. you eventually fell asleep in it, and didn´t wake up when Cyno came home either. he just looked at you confused as to why you were wearing his hoodie, but ignored it and brought you to bed. when you woke up he just started telling bad hoodie jokes, while you looked like a fresh tomato, great.

he would love you even more if you´d laugh at his jokes.

Xiao

you first liked the big hoodie he wears in the winter, it looked comfy and was big on him, therefore bigger on you. you wanted to try it on, but didn´t know how to ask. you did think about asking but was afraid of him reacting badly. so one day, when he wasn´t home, you just took a look into his closet and chose something you would want to wear. you chose this big blue and black, though mostly blue, hoodie since he wears it a lot. and when you put it on you, you fell in love, it was way to big on you, and it smelled exactly like him. but you didn´t really want to take it off just yet, and kept it on for the rest of the day. and then... xiao came home, he didn´t see his hoodie on you immediately, but could sense that something was different. but when he finally noticed, he just blushed a little. kidding he looked like a fresh tomato/very pretty one/and didn´t want to talk to you for a little, but it was fine in the end. and he eventually got over it.

no he´s not cute when blushing, or at least he doesn´t want to admit it.

Albedo

you see, he had this one hoodie he wore all the time/it´s mostly while he´s studying, but he does that a lot/and there was just something about it that you really liked. maybe it was how big it looked on him/meaning bigger on you/or maybe it was only the fact that it's his. soooo... when he was out for a group project, where he couldn´t wear his studying hoodie(yes im gonna call it that)because that wouldn´t be appropriate. so, you just took a little look in his closet, finding his hoodie and put it on. and as you thought it was way to big on you, but it was really comfy. and it also smelled like him, the perfume he uses, mixed with his shampoo. the only problem was just that albedo was coming home early/because he´s a genius, so they finished quickly/and you didn´t know. so when he got home you both got a surprise, you didn´t know he would be coming home early, and he saw you in his hoodie. he wasn´t mad or anything, but he just didn´t know how to react/he thought you looked cute in it though/.

he didn´t know this was what he would be coming home to.

Thank you for reading this thing, luv ya-Masterlist

You are welcome to reblog and like any of my posts, but you CAN NOT translate, copy or hate on anybody for liking my posts

[screeching-bunny]

Helloooo my fave yandere!character writer! I hope your having a wonderful day! Can i request yandere!jock with male!reader and he finds the reader crying bc someone was bullying them or said smth mean or smth like that? Ik he would be pissed but i was thinking something along the lines of this:

*Reader explains what happens*

*Yandere!Jock absolutely pissed and turns to go beat the shit out of them*

Then the reader would grab is arm to stop him and say smthing like: “wait!…please…..please just….stay with me….please?” Like EEEEEEE I LOVE YANDERE!JOCK SMMMM AND IMA PASS OUT IF YOU DO THIS! OKAY THANKS BYE

(Also plz ignore if your requests are closed rn)

Yandere! Jock x Male Reader

Asks 2

Warnings: Obsessive Behavior, Yandere Thoughts, Bad Writing, Stalking, Reader is specifically going to be Male in this post!!!

Asks 1

Yandere! Jock liked looking at you whether it be intention or not his eyes were almost always on you. He loved looking at every expression you made throughout your day to day life and practically memorized every fine detail on your face. So it was no surprise that he was instantly alerted when he saw a hint of sadness appear on your face when you came in for your afternoon class. Like a little leach he started attaching himself towards you with a concerned look on his face to find out what had happened to his little darling but alas his attempts reamied futile as you refused to give him an answer that he accepted.

“I’m just tired and just didn’t get that much sleep last night.”

Tired his ass. Yandere! Jock knew for a fact that you fell asleep early last night while watching an animal documentary. How does he know this? Well, he was stalking I mean watching over you last night. Anyways the sentence “The giant horse cock weighs over eight pounds” was still fresh in his mind but that's not the point! The point is something or someone made you upset! This is honestly so absolutely unacceptable!! When class finishes he ends up cornering you to try and figure out what has happened to you. Soon you start to give in and tell him the exact reason as to why with tears bawling out of your eyes.

When he finds out the reason he is beyond pissed. A bunch of npc bullies had the audacity to go and bully you! There is nothing he wants to do then skin those losers alive for making you cry like this. How fucking dare they. Yandere! Jock immediately decides that at that moment, he would go on a manhunt. He genuinely believes that it’d be a good riddance, no way in hell is someone going to miss them. As he tries to get up, he is immediately stopped by you as you grab ahold of his arm.

“Please stay, I don’t want to be alone right now.”

Holy shit! That sentence damn near put him in a coma. He just can’t believe how adorable you are. With that, he decides right away to bring you to his home in order to comfort you. The rest of the day is spent with just the two of you guys together while watching Netflix and ordering out to eat. All of his plans that he had before were canceled in favor of being by your side. He does his best to make you happy and laugh as much as possible. That smiling face of yours suits you better than a teary eyed expression. Although he can’t do it now, he vows to absolutely destroy the lives of your bullies. The mental and physical wellbeing of yourself matter more than anything in the world to him. Anything that causes harm to you he quickly deals with even if it means people. All that he wants is that you’ll be safe in his arms and by his side whenever he wakes up.

He makes it a point to prove the words of you tormentors were false and does his best to undo their claims. He’d be so appalled by the whole situation and just can’t wrap around his head at how someone could be mean to you. Like just look at you! You’re literally perfect what the hell were they smoking when they decided to verbally assault you. Yandere! Jock would be so overbearing and clingy towards you. Wherever you went he was close behind you. You’re going grocery shopping? Cool he’s right by your side. You gotta go to class? He’s right by you. Even if he doesn’t have the class he’s still coming. Showering? Move over and make room, he wants to shower as well. Is totally the type to throw a fit when you say no which causes you to relent and let him follow you.

In a few weeks after this incident there were missing people reports all over town of local college students. The same ones who coincidentally were vicious towards you. Everytime Yandere! Jock walks past these posters, he has a hidden smug look on his face. Justifies it by saying that he’s doing it in the name of love and that those people were the spawns of Satan. Besides, they're not even dead yet. They’re just trapped in a cabin in some random woods that only he has access to. Content with himself he spends his days by your side and pledging to himself that he’d never let anyone bother you ever again.

[luvonmes-blog]

CAN U PLEASE WRITE SMUT FOR CHASE DAVENPORT FROM LAB RATS WHERE HES A SOFT DOM AND HE JUST PRAISES YOU

WHO ARE YOU AND HOW DO YOU KNOW ABT MY OBSESSION WITH CHASE DAVENPORT⁉️⁉️⁉️

anywayyy this is an idea i’ve had for a while ty for letting it come to fruition😛

warnings - angst, smut, softdom!chase

chase was pissed off. pissed at himself for letting this happen and pissed at you for not listening to him.

because of him, you now lay on a lab table in mr. davenports basement, hooked up to a bunch of machines to make sure you were still alive. all because you wouldn’t listen, now here you are injured because of krane . you didn’t look like you and chase hated it. he sat at the computer in the lab, going over some files he and mr. davenport had encrypted, he was looking at any way he could wake you up. you were completely catatonic, only breathing on your own. chase took time every night to clean you up, scrubbing your body down with soapy water, washing your face with all the stuff you showed him, brushing your hair and moisturizing it.

he’s cried and kicked, bent over the lab table you’re resting up begging you to wake up. you never responded.

he now sat up at said computer, dozing off after spending so much time in the lab. he’s just about to fall asleep before he hears a loud gasp behind him. you’re gasping for air, pulling the tubes away from your nose, coughing and sputtering. chase turns around quickly, rushing over to you and sitting you up. he runs up and down your back as you gasp for breath, coughing as fresh air fills your lungs for the first time in weeks. you grip his shirt as you damn near cough your lungs up, finally catching your breath you turn to him.

he stares at you with wide teary eyes, his mouth open in a small ‘o’ as you look at him.

“where am i?” your voice is hoarse after not using it for so long and you clear your throat.

“u-um you’re in-” he stops to stare at you, “you’re in mr. davenports lab.”

“davenport… who’s mr. davenport?” you can hear his breath hitch, more tears well up in his eyes and you can almost see them fall.

“you- you don’t remember us?” his chest heaves as he looks at you and you can see him on the verge of panicking.

“chase,” he doesn’t respond. “chase! i’m just fucking with you, i’m sorry.” he lets out a breath and you swear you can physically see the relief wash across his face.

“don’t do that.” he looks down. “i thought you forgot us.

“i did.”

“what?”

“for a split second when i woke up. i didn’t recognize anything, i didn’t even know my own name. i remembered everything when i saw you, though.” chase sighed and then he collapsed, falling onto his knees and resting his head on your thighs.

“i’m sorry.”

“why?”

“we wouldn’t have been in this if it wasn’t for me, if i didn’t start that fight.”

“it’s fine, chase.”

“no it’s not.” he gripped your legs. “it’s my fault, i’m sorry.”

“chase,” you tugged at the hair on the nape of his neck. “it’s fine. i’m ok.” he stared into you eyes, his own filled with tears and he glanced over you. there were no scars or bruises, you did look and seem ok. he nodded his head at you and wrapped his arms around your body, pulling you into and burying his face into your neck, inhaling your scent. your own arms wrapped around his neck, letting your fingers run through his hair. he pulled back just slightly, enough to look at you and his eyes traced over your face, from the way you eyes sparkled at him to the small pout on your lips. he leaned in ever so slightly, you could feel his breath in your lips, his plush bottom lip rubbing on your own.

“can i?” you nodded at him and his lips were on yours immediately. they were rough on yours, like he was trying to swallow you whole, he parted your lips with his and slipped his tongue into your mouth. you sucked on the muscle and pulled his hair, his eyes rolled back and the smallest groan fell from his lips. “you’re so pretty.” he muttered against your lips. you tugged his shirt over his head quickly. throwing it somewhere across the room and feeling all moved his chest. your hands trailed down his torso to his pants, quickly unbuttoning them and pushing them down just enough.

“want you now, please.” he tried to take off the shirt your were dressed in but you moved his hands down your body, kicking off the shorts and underwear you were wearing. “now.” you emphasized. your lips met again, teeth and tongues clashing. he pressed the tip of his cock against your pussy. rubbing it through your wetness and soaking his cock in it.

“fuck.” he sighed. “you’re so wet, so perfect. you know that? you’re perfect.” you moaned as he pushed into you. he pushed into you slowly, letting you adjust to his size and getting used to the feeling of your walls around him again.

“i-i’m not perfect.” you spoke as he gave you a tentative thrust.

“yes, fuck, yes you are. so perfect, you’re so smart, so pretty. you’re everything.” he groaned as his head fell into your neck. “everything to me.” he whispered, w not sure if you were meant to hear it but you did, you clenched around him at the words. his thrusts sped up, the sound of clapping skin echoing around the lab.

“chase, so good, ‘s so good.” your words were slurred as your head fell back. chase picked his head up to look at you, your head was thrown back, eyes closed, and mouth parted as you let out soft mewls and moans of his name. he watched as your chest raised and fell with each of your heavy breaths, you looked so beautiful. his hand came up to wrap around your throat and pull you in for a kiss. your lips met gently, less of a kiss and more of just your lips against each others.

“you’re so pretty, so fucking pretty.” his thumb traced circles in your jaw, he held your face to make you look at him and the eye contact sent chills down your spine.

“chase!” you gripped his shoulders, “m’ gonna cum!” your voice raised a pitch and you clenched down around him. your legs shook around his waist as your orgasm washed over you. you cried out as wave after wave crashed down on your body, just watched and admired your form and before he knew it his own orgasm was catching up to him.

“oh, fuck.” he groaned, pulling out quickly and jerking his cock in his fist. rope after rope landed on your stomach and thighs, his orgasm finally subsided and his head fell into your chest. you panted together. both of you basking in your post-orgasmic haze.

——————————

don’t ask me why this took so long to publish cause it honestly shouldn’t have.

[lazybutsmexy]

Hi !! Sorry to bother you rn, I'm just here to make a request if you don't mind TT

I've been struggling with anxiety lately and ur work or your fics really put a smile on my face (especially König fics !! I love him sm TvT) and well here I am wanted to request something about König comforting reader when they feel down or low (like cying for no reason or apologize for something random) 🫶🏻

Hello lovely! Thanks for the message 🫶♥️ I'm glad my writings can help put a smile on your face 😊

Warning: angst/comfort, depressive thoughts, König being a sweetheart 🥺

•~•~•~•~•

It's late in the night until it becomes early in the morning. The hours had passed in a haze and you didn't know how to bring yourself to care. You had been staring at the wall in front of you for as long as you remember. Your thoughts were muddled and dark, you wonder if they are even yours to begin with.

There was a weight in your chest that you couldn't brush off, and a pressure behind your eyes you have been keeping at bay for hours. You were completely exhausted from the effort of keeping yourself from breaking down while König was asleep behind you. You knew that the moment you started tearing up you wouldn't be able to stop, and that would certainly wake him up.

You felt him turn around in his sleep - you didn't dare to look over your shoulder, or you would certainly crumble. His breath fanned over the nape of your neck, steady and warm. It was comforting, and you wondered if you even deserved that.

There was a faint chirping of birds outside the window when you heard him moving again, and then you felt his arm secure itself around you. There was a faint stroke of his fingers against your ribs, when you heard him speak.

"...is it one of those days, Liebing?" His voice was throaty, heavy with sleep.

You delayed your answer, partially because you were blaming yourself for waking him and making him deal with those emotions of yours, and partially because there was a knot in your throat that prevented your voice from coming out. He presses a soft kiss on your shoulder - he wasn't rushing you to answer, just letting you know he was patiently waiting. He knew you were awake, there was no hiding from him now.

You nodded, not daring to try and speak at all. You didn't move your hand to cup his, and that told him everything he needed to know.

With a soft sigh, he tugged your side until you relented and turned around to face him. You didn't want to look into his eyes, but when his fingers cupped your chin and made you look up, you met his tender, understanding eyes. You couldn't stop the waterworks now, fat tears rolling down your cheeks as you struggled to form any words.

"I'm-... I'm sor-" you tried to apologize - for waking him, for not being stronger, for being so weak-minded - but your voice cracked and got caught in your throat painfully.

König shushed you and kissed your forehead and cheeks, his arms surrounding you fully and bringing you impossibly closer to him. "Don't apologize, mausi," his muttered against your skin between kissing your tears away, let it out, we can talk later, just let it out."

You crumbled then, sobbing into his chest as his hands wandered over your naked skin. It wasn't sexual in any way, just the weight of his hands pressing against your body, comforting you, grounding you to him.

You didn't know when you fell asleep, you only realized you did it when you woke up. There was sunlight peeking from the heavy window curtains, and a sweet smell enveloping your senses. König's side of the bed was still faintly warm, and you found yourself clutching at one of his hoodies - your favourite one. You looked at it, knowing it hadn't been there the previous night, but in the fresh laundry you had put away. He had picked it up and left it for you.

With a newfound warmth in your chest, you put the hoodie on and crawled off the bed. You washed your face in the en-suite bathroom, and dared to look at yourself in the mirror. Your eyes were swollen and flushed from all the crying, and your hair was everywhere. At least you had managed to get some rest, you supposed.

You finally followed the sweet scent of cooking sugar to the kitchen, where you found your boyfriend stirring a pot and talking on his phone. He was speaking in German, and you couldn't quite pick the words.

"Danke, Mutti," he ended the call and put the phone down, catching you on his periphery and offering you a smile, "good morning, Häschen, breakfast is almost ready."

You tried to mimic his smile, but your face felt sore from all the crying, and chose to approach him instead, peeking over at the pot.

"... Your mom's rice pudding is a dessert," you comment, and he chuckled shortly, his hand finding your waist easily.

"Well, today feels like a day to eat rice pudding for breakfast, don't you think?" He turns off the stove and turns around, grabbing you by your hips and sitting you on the counter. The marble is cold, but his hands were warm, and so was his body as he stood between your thighs.

"Are you feeling better?" His lips brushed your forehead, and you sighed as your fingers clutched the front of his shirt.

"... A little," you hummed, looking up at him when he cupped the back of your head.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"...Not yet."

He leaned down and kissed you softly in the lips, too shortly for your liking, but his lips never went far, brushing against yours as he spoke. "That's alright, mausi. I'll be here when you want to talk."

A/N: König calls his mom 'Mutti', fight me if you disagree 😤

[shiftingwithmars]

🌌𝐍𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐬—𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐨 𝐑𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐥𝐞🌌

A/N: Thought of this while trying to sleep. I’m sorry but I just HAD to write this one

Summary: When Mattheo has a nightmare about his father, he goes to the one person he knows he can always trust. You.

Warnings: Fluff, soft!Mattheo, use of Y/n, Mattheo’s father being a huge jerk as usual, comfort comfort comfort!!

Mattheo woke up with a start, his chest heaving as he gasped for air. The memory of his dream was still fresh in his mind. The burning pain as the ink was tattooed on his skin, the skull and snake reminding Mattheo of the fact that he was born into a fate worse than death. The reminder that he was born to be a monster. He could still remember his father watching in amusement as his son was branded with his own mark.

Mattheo frantically rolled up his sleeve, his eyes immediately falling on his arm. His arm was bare, thank god, but the dream still burned in his mind. The pain, the way his father was so proud to see his son branded as a monster. Mattheo quickly got out of bed, slowly making his way towards the dorm of the one person he could trust. You.

You were half-asleep when Mattheo snuck into your dorm. You glanced up as his familiar figure entered the room, and your eyes immediately fell on the tears running down his cheeks. “Matty?” You questioned with a mixture of confusion and worry as your boyfriend entered your dorm. Mattheo slowly approached you, his lip quivering ever so slightly.

“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you…” He said softly, but you just waved his words off. “Shh, it’s okay. What’s wrong, baby?” You asked softly, glancing up at Mattheo in concern. “B-bad dream…” Mattheo answered quietly, as if ashamed to even admit it. Your expression softened, and you gently pulled him closer. “Hey, shh…” You sighed, gently tilting his chin so that his gaze met yours “Do you wanna stay here for the night?” You asked softly, to which Mattheo immediately nodded. “Please…”

You gently pulled Mattheo into your lap, his head resting on your chest. He curled up in your lap, burying his face in your shoulder as his tears soaked your shirt. You gently played with his hair, whispering soft words into your boyfriend’s ear as you let him cry against you. “I-it was my father…” Mattheo stumbled out, crying even harder. You listened intently as he explained his dream, your concern only growing more and more as he talked. You trailed soft kisses across his face, telling him that everything was okay and it was all just a dream.

Mattheo slowly began to relax, feeling his eyes grow heavy. You rubbed his back, tracing soft shapes against his skin. Mattheo buried his face in the crook of your neck, letting out a sigh of content as he nestled against you. It wasn’t long before Mattheo fell asleep, listening to the sound of your breathing and the soft beat of your heart.

Mattheo slept peacefully for the rest of the night, safe in the arms of the person he loved. Mattheo was glad that he came to your dorm, thankful for the support of the person he was going to marry one day.

A/N: this was genuinely so fun to write. I just wanna hug and cuddle my boy until he feels better😭

[colossal-fallout]

Hii, you were one of the first blogs I followed when I was new in Tumblr and it's been years already. I've been in and out of the aot fandom, but I recall how obssesed I was with Porco and Reiner in your writtings. And when I read your chapter one of the new story, it got me into it again. Shipping warriors with paradisian characters is my pleasure, specially scouts, and I love the whole possibilities with the paths and inherited memories, so I fell in love with it.

I saw your requests for hcs are open so, if you can, could you do about warriors x scout reader hcs? How it would be and all? (yes, the Porco story inspired me)

Thank you for being here!

And gladly - it's something I often think about / write about. It would be such a beautifully cruel love but then again, the world is cruel, right?

Including some lore planned for my fic. If the lore I have implemented in wasn't there and you were just a normal person then everything would still play out pretty much the way it does in the Manga. Everyone is far too well disciplined for anything else. It'll make sense when you read it lol

Warrior X You (A member of the Survey Corps)

Porco - Annie For Reiner & Bertoldt I've kinda already done you can read them here. It wouldn't really be much different than what I have already written.

Warnings: Angst. Fluff. Smut. GN Reader.

Everything going on with the curse of Ymir is literally due to the cycle of hatred and breaking that awful pattern. And so the love between a Warrior and someone from the Isle of the devils is something so pure and must be treasured.

Ymir herself probably set this up or helped via paths and memories. The memories aren't meant to teach further hate, but to understand and grow - something no one has achieved thus far.

Until you come along that is.

Porco

As written in my fic, Porco would first see you through the eyes of Ymir and her memories, as he tries to comb through to see his brother's.

He only catches glimpses of you at first but you took his breath away. He'd never thought he'd ever lay eyes on someone so perfect.

Tries to differentiate between his own reactions and if this is how Ymir felt. But no, Ymir was with that Historia person.

100% convinced you're a witch / warlock.

Because of course, the only thing to make him tremble, blush and his heart race is witchcraft. Porco isn't one for menial things like romance. Sure, he loves the attention he gets for being a warrior but he doesn't really have time to hunt kitty. If he wasn't so dedicated it'd be a different story, Porco obviously is ego driven a lot of the time.

In my fics it's because you were placed there specifically from a different universe (ours) to have a fresh set of eyes, heart and the chance to break the cycle. You can't be turned into a titan because you're not Eldian, you're from here. (You're not aware of this though, at least not yet) yet you have access to paths but only when Ymir sees fit.

So when you're both asleep, sometimes you'll both have extremely vivid dreams about talking to each other. Full on conversations. And they go on for a while. Like 3 years on and off.

When you figure out you're both real and from different continets, well that's up to you whether or not to try and get information from him. He won't ever give away secrets and will probably begin to resent you for trying when he fell for you so hard. So I wouldn't recommend it. Push everything away. This time in paths is sacred. The war can wait.

It'll even go so far as to making love within paths, and waking up with the love mark on your neck and him with nail marks in his back just confirms further this is real.

Porco removes his shirt after a heavy training exercise;

Peick: 😳😳😳

"What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Do... do you have a girlfriend? /boyfriend?"

"W-what?! N-no, don't be dumb."

Zeke: "Then what are those love scratches doing down your back? Someone's been a bad boy to a good little pussy cat."

Porco will go beetroot red denying it and instantly healing them now he was aware they were there.

Adhere by the law of ymir and when you meet, well, its up to you what happens. But the path of true love and peace is right there to take.

Annie

The paths route will be a little harder to take with other shifters at first, because they don't have any memories linking you together. And well, you're physically together so it's not really needed. (Except Pieck & Zeke)

In the Anime/Manga, Annie certainly has a soft spot for Armin, evidently. She's probably the closest one to undoing the cycle if you weren't there.

When you're there it's different. It's like you're magnetically drawn to titan shifters, and them to you, because of your gift from Ymir. Explains why you get along with them better than most during training.

Annie, like the others are pretty far down the conditioning hole and it'll take quote a bit for her to even consider a romance with the enemy.

But again, there's just something special about you. Your aura screams magnetism and there's just something so mystical about you.

You radiate kindness and understanding - it may be hard because well you don't know anything else. But your empathy and understanding is what helps your case with Ymir on judgment day.

But when they fall for you, they fall hard. It really is just up to you what decisions you'll make with their heart in your palm. But remember - Ymir is watching.

[faegoddessog]

 Seventy Two Hours of Bliss Ch. 35/41

Chapter 35: The Road Ahead

Chapter Warnings: Explicitly mature content, 18+ only, Fingering, unprotected PiV, (play safe ya'll) mention of past self harm (There is help for self-harm, Text CONNECT to 741741 ), angst, possessive sex,

Series Masterlist 

Series Summary:

You are neighbors with Austin Butler on the Gold Coast of Australia just prior to shooting Elvis. You become just friends because he is taken. However, after he is single again, you both find out just how attracted you are to one another and things get unrelentingly hot.

SERIES WARNING: Explicitly mature content, 18+ only,  here there be lemons.

Authors Notes: I started writing this while remodeling my kitchen, so that informed the slightly quirky narrative. It starts slow, but once it heats up, it is on fire. I have tried to pull facts from RL as much as I could, but obviously there are some assumptions and flat out dreamy wishes  involved here. 

Chapter 35: The Road Ahead

Late one night in the beginning of July, you are lying in bed unable to sleep.  Austin is conked out next to you, he looks like an angel, breathing softly in the light of your phone. You habitually pull up your email. The top email is from the US Antarctic program. You are suddenly terrified to open it. You toss your phone to the foot of the bed like it’s on fire. 

Shit, it’s here. The thing  you have been dreaming of and yet dreading in the back of your mind is actually here. One long held, life-affirming dream potentially lying in wait at the foot of the bed, another fresh, new, love-affirming dream lying next to you. What if you have to choose between them? You aren't ready to confront a choice like this. 

What if Antarctica doesn't want you and you never end up going. One dream crushed. The other is still here, asleep next to you. 

But what if they do want you. You HAVE to go. This, plus renovating Tom and Rita’s in Greece, will complete your 7 continents. You wouldn't forgive yourself if you give up on your ‘every continent’ goal. It's the one thing that kept you going after facing death, after being broken mind, body, heart and soul. You just can’t, not for anyone, not even for Austin.  But if you go, what will happen between you? Will he still want you, will you still want him?  What if absence makes the heart grow forgetful instead of fonder. You push those thoughts away viciously, your heart rate increasing. 

Oh my god, you don't know how to feel right now, strong opposing emotions stretch your capacity to think rationally.  You swirl perilously close to that blank place of apathy. Thought patterns and emotions you thought you had dealt with, re-surfacing after so many years. The place you fell into when he left while you were still in your hospital bed. That place you went when you were torn apart physically, mentally and that fucker left your heart and self esteem in tatters.  The place of neutral feelings, everything gray and bland.  The place where bright streaks of red welling up on your arms weren't cause for alarm, just a way of feeling something, anything.  The place where living and dying were all the same. 

'Fuck no you don't!' She screams inside your head, color and knife edge emotions brought back into sharp focus, 'We are NOT doing that again! Austin isn't him. He would never do that to you!' 

You roll over and huddle into the angel's chest, hiding from what may be on your phone. Your breath is shallow and shaky. FUCK! Why can’t you just stay in the now. The literal right now, in your little Austin bubble where he is yours (and Elvis’) all day, every day.  What if all this between you is just because it’s convenient? What if absence makes him simply forget you exist? What if someone else, swoops in and takes him away from you while you are gone? You try in vain to take in big, long breaths, attempting to shove those dangerous thoughts out of your head. 

'Shut the fuck up bullshit inadequacy!" She is so much more than just a sex-driven demon. 

You start trembling, clinging to him, hoping it’ll stop before he wakes up.  Damnit, you know better than to get yourself worked up. Fucking anxiety attack. 

‘When the hell did you become THIS girl?’ you ask yourself, ‘Antarctica is your dream!"

‘When you fucking fell in love with that sexy boy right there,”  she states, "when you let yourself finally become vulnerable to someone else."

Woken by your movement and the breath across his skin, Austin folds you in his arms. 

This only manages to make you shake more. Knowing you aren't actually alone here is like permission to let all that has been running around your head leak out. 

“Hey, Kitten,” his voice gravelly with sleep.” hey, what’s wrong? I’m here baby, it’s ok. Shhhh,”

His immediate concern shifts your anxiety into tears. Damnit.

“Wanna talk about it, Kitten?”  he asks, concerned and rubbing your back, ”was it a bad dream.” 

“No baby,” you sob, “it’s this dream…It’s too good…..what if it doesn’t ….” you whimper into his chest, tears wetting his skin. 

“What are you talking about, sweetheart?” he pets your hair soothingly. 

“What if you forget …And someone else,” you are practically hyperventilating and unable to finish your sentences through your sobs, ”So in love ...  how can I … will you want...... how can I face mys- … fuck… why am I so… fuck!" tears stream down your face. 

“Shhhh, Kitten, darling,” he doesn't try to understand, he just holds you close, kissing your forehead, “I love you baby, just breathe.”

Gradually you get your breathing under control and your heart beat slows as the anxiety runs it's course. He sits up, leaning against the headboard, taking you with him. He turns on the bedside lamp, hands you the bottle of water he keeps there and a tissue. 

You blow your nose, feeling a little foolish, and sip the water. 

“Are you ready to tell me what is going on?” he asks as you hand the bottle back to him.

"I'm so sorry baby, fucking anxiety," head hanging and your hand covering your face, feeling a little ashamed.

"Whoa, sweetie," he gently removes your hand and holds it in his rubbing his thumb along the back.  He tips your chin up to look at him, "there is nothing to be sorry for. I am here for you my love, no matter what."  

His loving gaze melts you.  You take a deep breath, then another. You nod and reach for your phone.

“I haven’t read it yet to see what it says, but I got an email from the Antarctica people and um… all my anxiety just exploded.”

“Why anxiety hunny? I thought that would be exciting for you,” he frowns a little, "it's what you've been waiting for." 

“Well, what if they said no, there goes my dream of all 7 continents, but what if they said yes… and I... I leave,” your voice gets shaky again and words tumble out as if they will never be said unless you say them quickly. “What if you forget all about me and I never see you again.  And why the fuck am I being so insecure? But how can I not go, it’s my dream and yes, so exciting and I don’t want to lose you, but… I mean I would never ask or expect you to give up your career and dreams to follow me around the world carrying boxes...“

Austin places one hand on your cheek, arresting your freight train of thought.  “Oh baby, we knew this was coming, and yeah it's a daunting now that it's here, but I would never ask you to give up on those dreams for any reason.  It’s another one of those things that makes me love you," his other hand frames your face, his eyes boring into yours, "Did you hear that? I. Love. You. Forgetting you is simply not possible. Do you think I hand out custom butt plugs to everyone I’ve dated? No. You are so unique and such an amazing human.  And no, I wouldn’t give up my dreams, but I would follow you anywhere and carry anything for you. So instead of what-if-ing, let's see what they actually said,” his deep voice has a calming effect on your nerves. 

You open the phone, then shove it over to him, “You read it, I’m too nervous.”

He nods, licking his lips. He is nervous too. He scans the email. 

“They want you baby,” he smiles up at you.

“What?!” you snatch the phone from him. The email says you are the primary applicant for the Antarctica position you interviewed for last February. They want you on the winfly to prep the station for the austral summer influx.  Your contract would run until February with an option for longer should you choose. Because of quarantine procedures and mandatory training you will have to leave in two weeks. They want an answer in 48 hours. 

“Oh fuck, two weeks, I thought I’d have longer than that.” You look up at him with tears threatening.  You don’t even know how to feel; elated? sad? scared?  “Should I tell them yes?” you ask, all nerves.

“Um, you had better! You would never forgive yourself or me if you didn’t,” he knows you so well.

“Fuck, you are right. I would end up so pissed if I told them no," you realize that saying no for him would drive an inevitable wedge between you, "I guess I’m going to Antarctica!” the excitement starts to seep into the cracks left behind by the anxiety.  

“I’m so excited for you! You are gonna crush it!” he grabs your face and plants a kiss on your lips, then pulls you close for a hug. 

“I’m going to miss you so much though babe,” you say into his chest. 

“Kitten, it’s not even a year, we can handle that. Besides,  in this day and age, it’s nothing. I’ll call you all the time,” he tries to reassure you. 

You pull away from him, forehead crinkled and look him dead in the eye. 

“Oh, Austin, there is no cell service there. They barely have internet. That’s why I’m scared you’ll …. “ you let your sentence fade off. It’s stupid, the idea he’ll forget you, but the fear of losing him is bigger than you ever wanted it to be. This is why you have not gotten involved with anyone for so long. Fear of losing... again.  

“Ok then, we will do it old school and I’ll write you letters,” he smiles, undeterred, “and if they don’t have mail I’ll use a carrier penguin.” 

This makes you crack a smile. 

“Kitten, something you may not have realized about me, when I fall in love, I do it hard. And nothing and no one is going to change how I feel about you,” his hands are cradling your face, thumbs wiping away stray tears, “got it baby?” 

You just nod, holding his hand to your cheek. 

He kisses you lovingly and sweetly, then deeper more passionate but still tender. He pushes you onto your back, rolling on top of you. His weight comforting as his tongue gently explores your mouth. He kisses you until all the anxiety is washed away, replaced with pure undiluted Austin. 

“Do you want me, Kitten?” he whispers, pressing his stiff cock against your thigh, ”can I make love to you?” 

“Please yes,” you whisper back, legs spreading to make room for his hips. His mouth is on your neck, kissing and gently sucking as his hardness finds its way inside you, filling you. It feels so blissfully good. He moves in you in this sweet, gentle way. He is unhurried.  Each instroke is strangely soothing to your soul. Things have been so surreal in the world, but this, this moment, is as real as it gets. 

In the morning, you get an appointment with your therapist. You hadn’t needed a session in a while. She is, luckily, available because of the time difference. You give her the rundown of the situation and how those self-destructive thoughts surfaced again.

She talks about how something so traumatic never really leaves you, and it’s normal that they arise from time to time, triggered by similar strong emotions. You talk about Austin, about how deeply in love you are with him, how you are afraid of losing him,  all the things he did and said when you were having your breakdown. 

“You have come so far from the girl who first told me she would rather die than fall in love again. He sounds like a good one. Have you told him about what happened?” She asks. 

“Not exactly, he knows I was in an accident, he knows I was engaged. But not the whole story, it’s just not come up,” you say. 

“You should tell him, give him some context for your fears,” she suggests. 

You nod, she has a point. 

After you end the session, you and Austin facetime to your Uncle Roy. He agrees to let Austin stay in the apartment rent free. 

“I like that there is someone there during the pandemic” Uncle Roy says, “plus Austin is like family now.”  Just as he says that, Marissa walks in.

“Daddy, can I borrow the…” she looks at the screen, “Why are you watching an interview with Austin Butler?” 

Oh shit. 

You whisper, ‘Marissa’ to Austin. He raises his eyebrows as if to say, ‘you ready for this?’

Well, here goes nothing! 

“Hey Mar!” you pop your head into view. 

“It’s your cousin and her boyfriend in the Aussie apartment,  Mari Bear,” your uncle has no idea that the cat is out of the bag. He doesn’t even know there is a cat OR a bag. 

Marissa just stares at the screen, mouth agape as Austin puts his arm around you so you can  both fit into the phone screen. 

“Wait, YOU’RE THE FRENCH WOMAN?! How the hell!!” She squeals, grabbing her phone. 

“Put the phone DOWN Mari!” you say threateningly. Mari freezes. “Uncle Roy, thank you so much for being so cool about this, I need to talk with Mari girl to girl  for a second.”

“You two and all your girl talk, since you were kids,” he waves his hand, shrugs and steps out of the room. You step away from Austin. 

“Listen Mar,” you voice lowered conspiratorially, “we are not ready to go public with this so if you or anyone you know or that follows you even so much as hint that you know the identity of the ‘French woman’, anywhere online and I will 1. Never you let you meet Austin in person and 2. I will tell EVERYONE about what happened at the lake and I mean everyone.”

“You wouldn’t dare!” Mar gasps, looking around to make sure her dad isn’t near. 

“Like hell I wouldn’t. That is how important this is to me, and yes, I still have the negatives,” you remind her.  

“Okay, Okay! Well when you are out, can I have a big reveal for my channel?” She asks, trying to bargain. 

“How about this, if you keep fucking quiet, we will set you up with his publicist and we will work something out.” you say, walking back to Austin, giving him a thumbs up. 

“Holy fuck, I’m freaking out right now!” Mari exclaims as you lean up against Austin.

He gives her a little finger-tip wave.

“Hey Marissa, nice to meet you. Thanks for keeping this on the DL, for us. We really appreciate it,” he says in his interview voice,  giving her a winning smile. 

“Oh, of course Mr. Butler,” she is all flustered. 

“It’s just Austin, but thank you,” he nods his head. 

Once you get off the phone, you glance at Austin. 

“You handled that well, what did you say to keep her quiet?” giving you a side eye.

“Well, I’ve been handling Mar our whole lives. I love her cuz she’s family, but she has trouble with boundaries. I have dirt on her that she doesn’t want out. And um…  I told her we’d hook her channel  up with your publicist when, and if, we are ready.” 

“Hmm, alright, I’m not sure how she will feel about that, but we can talk,” he says. 

“Yeah, oh fuck, I didn’t think, will your publicist follow her socials? I won’t be able to with no internet,” you ask. 

I will call her later and we will talk about it,” he smiles at you.

For the next two weeks, any time not spent  filling out forms and packing things either for storage or Antarctica is spent with Austin. He still studies Elvis every day, not wanting to lose his momentum. You try to find the right time to tell him more about what happened with your ex, but it never seems right. You cook together, watch some of your favorite movies, you take moonlight walks on the beach and the sex… oh my god the sex. 

You have been trying out your hand at mixed drinks for the past several nights. Tonight is gin night. You have about a week until you leave.  You are both on your way to being tipsy, having tried a  Tom Collins  then Negronis. You had just made two shaken gin martinis and  clinked them together, feeling super fancy.

“I have a prezzie-prize for you babe,” you say, feeling goofy. You reach into your bag and pull out a post mailer. “I had the mail wrap it for you.” You giggle at your own joke and hand it to him. 

“OH! A present! For me!!” he exclaims, being silly himself.

He tears open the package. It’s two pairs of Meundies boxer briefs. The first one has martini glasses with the words ‘extra dirty’ on them. Two little olives are cuddling in the glasses with a little heart over their heads. Yeah, you might’ve timed this with your drinks on purpose. He looks at the second pair and then at you.

“You didn’t” he says. You just nod with a huge grin on your face They are light blue and covered in unicorns with rainbow manes and tails, just like your favorite panties. He just laughs and hugs you to him. “I love them hunny."

He insists that you two go up to the rooftop with your drinks. 

You grab blankets and toss your drinks into to-go cups with lids. There are no lights up there, just the ambient light of the city. He stands there looking out over the ocean, sipping his drink. You slip under his arm. It’s a little chilly, maybe 15C, the breeze from the ocean making it feel a little colder. 

“I know I’m a little drunk, but I want the world to know that I love you, Kitten.” He kisses you softly,  then holds his drink up and yells at the top of his lungs “I, Austin Butler, love this woman right here!”  

A distant ‘good for you! Now shut up!’ bounces off the buildings.  

You giggle as he sits on one of the lounge chairs, laughing. He draws you down on his lap, straddling him. 

“I love you too, so much it kinda hurts,” you admit.

“Hurts? No, no baby,” he shakes his head, putting his drink down, ”I don’t want you to hurt, only feel good. Here let me kiss it and make it better.” He leans forward filling both his hands with your breasts and plants a kiss in the middle of your chest, on your heart. 

Your fingers play in his hair as you lean down and breathe deep the scent of him in the cool night air. Filing it away in your memory as best you can. 

“All your kisses make me better, darlin’,” you mutter, kissing the top of his head, feeling the gin seep into your brain.

He takes your cup and sets it down next to his.  You wrap the blankets you brought around you both. He cradles your jaw and your lips meet.  You moan against his closed mouth, inhibitions evaporating. You are both just a little clumsy from the alcohol, but the ‘whiskey kisses’ are divine.  

“You are so hot Kitten.  I had a dream the other day that I fucked you up here,” he murmurs against your lips, hand rubbing against your clothed crotch. 

“You dream about me?” you had no idea.

“Oh yeah, all the time. Why do you think I wake you up with my cock so often. Damn, I’m gon’ miss that,” he presses his face to your breasts. 

“Tell me your dream, baby,” you cradle his head against you. 

“I was young Elvis,” he leans back looking into your neckr eyes, “and you were an adoring fan, sittin’ on my lap just like this, arms around me, only you had on a little skirt with nothing on under.  The sun was sinking and you glowed as I slipped into you. And now I’m gonna slide into you right here,” he says, “make you a puddle in my lap.” His hands undo your bra under your shirt with only two tries. His lips and teeth are against you. 

Your insides clench tight, juices starting to flow. 

“I would be disappointed if you didn’t,” you say, rocking back and forth onto his swelling bulge. His hands slide into the waistband of your pants. You try to get your pants off of one leg. In your haste and clumsiness, you end up falling off his lap onto the grass, taking the blankets with you. You both start laughing. 

He helps you up and you wiggle out of your pants. You straddle him again, re-settling the blankets around you both. His hand slips up your shirt to palm your breast in circles, watching your brow furrow in desire and your teeth capture your bottom lip. He gives you a naughty little grin and lifts your shirt over your tits. Gathering your breasts together with both hands, he licks your nipples. The cold air makes the flesh pucker. He pulls one into his mouth sucking hard, making you drop your head back and moan. Your hands curl up into his long hair, grasping him to you. His tongue is like fire licking your belly. 

Your hands push between your bodies, unfastening his fly and reaching to pull him out. He helps, his big cock already stiff and upright. 

“Do you see what you do to me, my beautiful Enchantress?” he motions to his cock, “Even tipsy as I am, I’m hard as hell for you.” 

“What I do? Feel what you do to me,” you lift up to give him space to reach between your legs. “My god Austin, just the mention of putting that gorgeous cock in me, made my cunt drip in anticipation. I want you so desperately.” 

He slips his dexterous digits between your folds. 

“Oh fuck baby, you are one horny minx aren’t you,” the corners of his beautiful mouth curl up and his demon gazes up at you. He begins to curl his fingers, finding the spongy, rough section on your front wall.

You are shaking, not from cold, but from eagerness. You love him inside you; want him like this always; always inside you somehow; always wanting you.  Your juices run in a runnel down his fingers and into his palm. Low moans flow from you.

“Oh my god,” you cry out, louder than you meant to. 

“Now, now Kitten, Are you gonna be quiet for me?” he asks.

“No,” your tipsy self answers honestly with a little giggle.

"Well that guy," he points over his shoulder, "might yell at you." 

"Fuck that guy," you shrug.

"No thanks, I'd rather fuck you." He pulls you into a passionate kiss. You grind your pussy into his hand.

Suddenly you are both overcome with desire. 

“Get that cock in me,” your tone demanding against his lips. 

He nods, holding himself by the base as you lift up. He positions himself at your opening and you grind down onto him in circles. Your moans mingle in your kiss.

The little pocket between you where his cock had been lying in wait, was chilly, despite all the blankets wrapped around you two. He feels cool inside you, so you can only imagine how warm you must feel to him. 

“Oh yes,” he moans, the alcohol hindering his usual verbal restraint, ”take all that cock like a good girl.” 

He feels so good inside you.

“Aw, I like being naughty though,” you retort, smiling at him and sliding up and back down onto him, wetness covering his cock.

“Who’s naughty Kitten are you then?” he asks, his voice deep.

“Well, let me see…” you joke, continuing to ride him. 

He tightens his grip on your hips, stopping your movement. 

“Who’s are you?” his eyes are suddenly serious and piercing. The tipsiness slows your brain just  enough that you don’t see the insecurity in his face until he thrusts hard and deep into you, bringing your senses into sharp focus. 

“Oh fuck,” is all you can say. 

“Who’s dirty girl are you?” he asks, louder, thrusting again. 

“I’m yours, baby,” looking into his eyes and finally seeing his seriousness.  

“Who owns this dripping, hot, wet, pussy?” each descriptor punctuated by a hard thrust into you.

“Oh Fuck, you do!” it would hurt if you weren’t so fucking turned on. 

“Who does?” he asks

“You do Austin. It’s your pussy.” 

“That’s right,” his voice is raspy, as he pulls your hair out of your face,  “You are MY naughty little Kitten. My dirty girl. All Mine!” 

“All yours baby,“ you say, rocking him in and out of you, “All yours to finger, to suck and lick, all yours to pound, yours to play with.” 

You press yourself close to his chest, pulling blankets up and around you both again. “Please, please don’t stop fucking me.” 

“Never,” he says through clenched teeth. 

His hands grips your legs, his hips raising and lowering his cock in and out of you. Your hand is braced behind his neck, forehead to forehead. He is steadily fucking you. 

“Oh god, I love it, I love that,” you moan in his ear, unable to stop words spilling out your mouth. 

Your knees are sliding wider and wider apart, wanting him deep, wanting him to slam into your clit with each thrust.

“Your pussy, your pussy, your pussy”, flows out your mouth. 

You are so close to the breech, mouth open. He can tell you are close so he quickens his pace. Your top teeth sink into the fleshy part of his shoulder, pussy clenching down.

“Oh Kitten, my dirty girl, I love fucking you,” his voice husky and low. His hips jerking roughly into you. 

 “Oh god, yeeeeessss,” you scream, arching back, his words triggering pelvic spasms around the stiff rod he is torturing you with. A closed-mouth high-pitched wail sounds out your nose as you gyrate on his cock through an orgasm.

 Even if you wanted to, you can’t stop your hips from moving, jerking,  grinding onto him.

“You’re so fucking perfect baby, cumming on my cock like that. God damn,” even through your orgasm you recognize the deep desire in his voice. 

He lifts you off of him.

“Nononono don’t stop” you whine.

“Never, baby,” he slides his legs to either side as he pushes you back to lie on the foot of the lounge, the blankets behind you. You don’t even feel the cold. Your legs are  up by his shoulders, throbbing pussy exposed and open to him. 

“Do you want my cum?” he asks, his voice harsh with desire, his fingers flicking across your clit.

“Yes, yes, yes,” is your breathy reply, 

“Say it, Kitten. Do you want my cum?” he asks again, placing the tip of his glorious self at your opening.

“Fuck yes I want your cum Austin, please, I need your cock in me, fuck me please” you beg, your filter totally gone. “Please give me all your cum right here,” you tap out little slaps on your pussy. 

With you so lascivious under him, so lustful with need, he can’t hold back.  With a groan, he immerses himself in you. Immediately charging towards his own orgasm with fervor, hands on your shoulders, pulling you towards him. 

“Oh God,  fuck,  you make me cum so good! You make me cum so good! You make me cum so good!” your strings of words getting higher in pitch, on the brink of cumming against his onslaught. His hands slide to either side of your head. Forcing you to look at him. 

“Who’s pussy’s gonna cum?” he says through gritted teeth. His head is still, but his hips are pitching into you with such force, only his hands on your head keep the vision of him from being a total blur.

“Your pussy, baby, yours. You fuck your pussy so good, so good, so good, so fucking good.” Like a deluge of water dropping on you all at once, another orgasm slams into you, making you writhe under him, teeth imprinting onto his hand to muzzle the sound of your screaming. 

“That’s my girl. Cream that cock, dirty girl, fuck you feel so good,” he moans. Crest after crest of your orgasm seizes his cock, bringing him closer to baptizing you in his cum. 

“Who’s dirty girl are you?” he urges, wanting to possess you.

“I’m your d-d-d-d-dirty girl, I’m your dirty girl,” you stutter and moan out as you ride the wave of shivering pleasure. “Give me your cum. I want it, I want it in me!”

“It’s yours baby, it’s your cum, only for you Kitten,” he is pounding you hard, fast, head tucked down into your neck and shoulder.  "Oh Fuuuuuck, yessss!”  hisses out of him as he pushes deep and fills your pussy. “Oh  Gawawawad!” his whole body seizes on top of you.

Your arms and legs clutch him to you.  You are overwhelmed with emotion, everything you’ve been holding back about leaving welling up with your enormous orgasm.  

He  sits back in the lounge chair and pulls you and the blankets against him. You don’t realize it at the time, but his deep shaky breaths are hiding his own emotional overwhelm.  

After a while,  how long you can’t say as time feels fake,  you are curled up against Austin half naked, both of you calmer and somewhat less drunk. 

“Are you awake Kitten?” he ventures quietly and a bit nervously. 

“Yeah,” you answer, sensing something is off, “you ok?” 

“I, uh, I need to say something and um… I don’t want you to take it wrong,” he begins.

You sit up in his lap to look him in the face, suddenly terrified of what he is going to say.

“If you are breaking up with me…” your mind falls to the worst thing you can think of at that moment.

“What? NO! No, no!” he interrupts you, a look of horror on his face as he grips your outstretched hands. 

“Jesus,” your eyes close and you breathe a sigh, “what is wrong with me?” you mutter to yourself. You know what is wrong, it's time to tell him. 

“Oh babe,” he cups your check, “there is nothing wrong with you or with us. I just need to…” He hesitates.” Ok, there is a part of me that is so excited for you to live your dream. But there is also a chunk of me that doesn’t want you to go,” his forehead creases and furrows as he admits this to you. “And to be clear, I’m not asking you to give it up, I just need to be honest and present with my feelings. I know it’s a scary pandemic world right now, but I wouldn’t trade this time with you for anything. I’ve fallen so hard for you, I don’t know how I’m gonna do this without you. And what if you meet someone else? I know it’s stupid but you’ll be down there so far away and I can’t call. That's why the possessive stuff during... “ he bites his lip. ”What if… I have this weird fear that what if what we are feeling for each other doesn't translate to being apart? What if we can’t do this?"

You reach up, smoothing his forehead with your thumb. You hadn't realize he was feeling insecure too.  

“Same baby,” you say simply, “on all accounts.  I am excited AND I don’t want to leave. I’m also terrified that you will find someone else in the months that I am gone, I mean you are a sexy heartthrob of a man in the public eye, women and men must fall at your feet. I’m not sure how I’m going to cope without you either. I’m just hoping that we will both be so busy we won’t have time to dwell on it. And, I like being your dirty girl." you smile. 

"Listen Baby, I need to tell you this,  just so you have some context," you take a deep breath and forge ahead, "Do you remember I told you about the guy I used to flip houses with,” Austin nods, his face intent with listening. “Well, we were engaged when I had my accident and when he found out that I couldn't have kids, he came to the hospital the next day and broke it off. He said he didn’t want to drag it out, but that kids were the priority for him and he didn't want to waste any time finding the real mother of his children."

Austin looks appalled by this. You just nod.

"I was crushed, I was nothing but a baby factory in his eyes.  By the time I was out of the hospital, he had moved out of our apartment,  divided our holdings in half and left with no forwarding address or number. IHis family wouldn't take my calls. I didn’t get the chance to have any closure.  I slipped into a deep depression, feeling no self worth.  I started cutting myself just to feel something, anything. "

"Oh baby," Austin strokes your hands, empathy and concern on his face.

" Yeah, it was bad. I had a lot of therapy and meds. I slowly realized the gift of getting away from him, he would have never loved me for me. The continent thing was born when I started my own remodeling business, initially as a way to get away from that past. It grew into a passion. This dream has healed me in so many ways. I became an independent, curious, educated citizen of the world again.  It allowed me to meet you. I didn't think I’d ever let anyone this close to me again, but with you it was so damn easy I didn’t have to think twice.

“So yeah, I am afraid of losing you and I’m sorry I let my insecurity jump to conclusions. Will our relationship stand being apart? Babe, there is only one way to find out and it’s walking towards our fears.”

He nods again. You take another breath, and grab both his hands.

“I do know this: I’ve been ‘around’,” you admit, “ I’ve dated a fair number of people, and, honestly I’ve slept with a fair few more. Not one of them holds a candle to you,  to how you make me feel, the things you do to me. I have never before found what we have right here,” you move your clasped  hands up to each of your hearts. “I had given up on trying to find someone, until you. I am in awe of you Austin Butler and it blows me away that you consent to be with me.” 

“Consent? Kitten, I WANT to be with you. Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me all  that, especially the cutting, that can be hard to share.  I see why you responded the way you did, it makes a lot of sense. You have been through so much, seen so much of the world and have done it with grace and kindness and strength. You are amazing and brave and so fucking sexy. I will state for the record that I don’t care if you can’t have kids.  I want YOU, just as you are. You bring parts of me out that I didn’t know I had and I can’t keep my hands off you. I’m not going to deny the ego boost of getting that kind of attention from the public but at the end of the day it’s not fulfilling. It’s not THIS, “ he grips your hands back, “I am astonished that YOU are willing to be with ME, and I just want to be enough for you.”

“We are a pair, aren’t we,” you chuckle, shaking your head, “here we are worried about the same things, and each of us feeling insecure about not being good enough for the other, yet so over the moon about one another.”

“Well when you put it that way….yeah, “ he smiles, “I think we need to tell our insecurities to shut the fuck up and agree that we are more than enough. See through love’s eyes, instead of fear’s.”

“One hundred percent agree,” you smile at him, “and however we end up communicating over the next 7 months, let’s just be as honest as we can with each other. I mean if we decide it isn’t working, I’d rather not be delusional.”

“I don’t like to think about that, but I’d much rather be honest, so yeah,” he nods his head.  

“And,” you put your forehead to his, “I will make this promise to you: once Antarctica is over and I finish Tom and Rita’s, if you still want me, I will follow you to the ends of the earth.” 

“Take out the insecure ‘if you still want me’ part and it’s a deal,” he smiles at you.

“OK,” you breathe, starting over, “once Antarctica is over and I finish in Greece, I promise I will follow you to the ends of the earth.” 

“Not unless I follow you first babe,” he pulls you into a sweet kiss, hand on your chin. 

[bullet-prooflove]

Donna’s Wednesday Radio Show Prompt List #6

Hey guys! As some of may know I do a weekly radioshow on Wednesdays and I thought why not put together a prompt list from some of the songs I’ve been playing. I thought it would bring some fresh prompts into our world!

Feel free to pop any of these prompts with a charcter I write for (You can find these on the pinned post on my blog) into my ASK box!

1.      won't let me see this side of you

2.      You looked at death in a tarot card and you saw what you had to do

3.      I'm drinking tonight, gonna give up the fight

4.      turning me on Like a slow fire burn

5.      I choke back tears 'til I damn near drown

6.      You're not gonna make it

7.      Loveless nights, they seem so long I know that I'll hold you someday.

8.      We still talk like everyday But we don't talk in the same way that we used to

9.      This is the last time you say After the last line you break

10.   He pulled you closer, said he'll never let go

11.   And if only I could find the words Or muster up the nerve to tell her

12.   Can't keep my hands to myself

13.    the ghost of my sin

14.   But till you come back where you belong It's just another lonely Sunday.

15.   I fell for a boy who could never ever let me walk home that way 'Cause you gotta be safe

16.   You say that you love me, You won't remember in the morning

17.   I wish I'd known that it would be this hard to be alone. Please, come home!

18.   You're speaking like you really love him

19.   Maybe we'll see that we were wrong If ever we look back one day

20.   I thought that I was the exception I could rewrite your addiction

21.   The only thing stronger than you is whiskey

22.   Please, come back, don't you leave me

23.   When you're dying in LA

24.   Now all I can do is lay in my room Fall asleep, dream of you

25.   Tonight with me Won't you cut it up and dance all over me

26.   I'll never forget her and she'll always have a part of me

27.   He can be the one you run to, the one that saves ya

28.   the taste of goodbye on your lips when you kiss me

29.   You couldn't trust him but you never said no

30.   You trace my lines Stirring my soul

31.   And now you're dancing like you need him

32.   Don't let me go down this road again, We both know where this ends

33.   Put it in your pocket don't tell anyone I gave ya

34.   But for an angel, she's a hot, hot mess

35.   We both know love is not that easy

36.   He kissed you on the lips and opened your eyes

37.   Goodbye to my hopes and dreams

38.   I'm not gonna stay and watch you circle the drain

39.   Trust me, you'll make it through

40.   I know that I'm running out of time

41.   You had to catch your breath, got such a surprise

42.   Might be over now, but I feel it still

43.   Every now and then she makes you just a little bit crazy

44.   And you always forgot how it feels to live in his lies

45.   I wanna watch you undress

46.   It was your first cigarette

47.   But friends keep telling you what he did last night

48.   give-me-some-more girl

49.   In that moment he made you forgot how it feels when he's gone

50.   I know that it's wrong Still I run right into you

51.   I would rather we just go our different ways

52.   And now you're feeling like you miss him

53.   And you try to remember that there's no way you could ever be friends

54.   You better get your shit together

55.   He's out your system yeah it took you a while

56.   I know, 'cause I've been there too

57.   You and me together, forever

58.   I'ma disappear when they come for me

59.   You surround me, pull me, drown me then swallow me whole

60.   I shake and I shiver just to feel you breathe

61.   And all you want is just to hold her

62.   I forget who you used to be

63.   She's like a one-way ticket cause you can't come back

64.   You're way too young to be broken

65.   You pull me in close And buckle my knees

66.   I know it must seem frightening To have the world fall apart right under your shoes

67.   And I bit my lip the second you sipped The poison that was mixed for me

68.   You're way too young to play these games

69.   'Cause there are deeper and darker things than you

70.   From the beating of your heart

71.   Everything's turning dark to you

72.   I'm not the one Who wants to hurt you

[rajian]

wolgraha-week, day 5: comfort

A little bit of backstory for my Rajian: As she grew up in an orphanage, it was really important to her to found one herself which she did as soon as possible.

I hope you will enjoy this story :)

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It had been a long day again.

The kids at Koizumi Orphanage needed new school books again. A few of the bedrooms needed new furniture. A lot of planning. A lot of talking. A lot of writing. Rajian was tired.

When she came home she did not even wonder why she hadn’t locked the door. „It’s just one of those days“ she thought by herself.

Only when she entered the house she noticed the smell. The smell of… something… grilled?! While she was still standing there trying to process why her home would smell like food a red-haired head popped out of the kitchen. „Welcome home“ G’raha said with a big grin.

„Raha?! What are you doing here? I-I-I mean, not like I don’t want you to be but it is Wednesday and already 9pm and don’t you have work to do tomorrow and…“ there. She was babbling again. What a great thing to do when somebody comes to your home to prepare you a meal. „Don’t worry about it“ G’raha said softly. „It’s not like I really need to be at this meeting tomorrow. I’ll just tell Krile I had been reading the whole night. She won’t be surprised.“ – „Oh, you wanna read my new book with me later?! I just got it, it’s great, it’s about a beanstalk and… why are you laughing?!“ He was indeed laughing. Not out loud but the way you laugh when you don’t want to be mean. Rajian was sure, he was just too polite to laugh louder. She tried to fight the smile that crawled onto her face. Of course she lost the fight. In the end she could not help but chuckle herself even if she still didn’t know why he had started to laugh in the first place.

„Come here“ G’raha said „Food is ready. I got lucky at the market today. There was a sale for fresh fish!“ – „Is this… salmon?! My favorite!!“ Rajian was overjoyed. Just the thought of fresh salmon, grilled over the fire with just a hint of lemon… her mouth began watering while she sat down. With a „There you go“ he placed a full plate in front of her. She could barely wait until he had sat down as well (which Susumi had told her, was important) before digging in.

„By the way“ Rajian started once they had finished the most delicious meal ever known to catkind „how did you know I would not have time to cook today?“ – „Well…“ G’raha fidgeted with his hands. „Let’s just say… I… kind of went here because you told me you had a new book but you were not here so I called Koizumi Orphanage. They were the ones who told me you were still working and because I kind of know you…“ Rajian was perplexed. „Wait, so you DO wanna know about my new book!“ She said with a bright smile. „Come on“ she took his hand „we can do the dishes later!!“ and guided him to the basement into her library.

She told him all about the first chapter of the book which she had read already but in the end they read it all over again just in case she had forgotten anything… as if she would. They took turns reading to each other and finished the book that night. Only to start another one.

In the end the dishes had to wait until morning came as Rajian and G‘raha had been talking and reading the whole night through. The night ended with her head landing on his shoulder as she fell asleep while being in the middle of the conversation. He was puzzled at first but happily accepted his fate. As Rajian woke up in the morning she was still resting with her head on his shoulder, his head now lying on hers. What a wonderful evening this had been. G’raha sure knew how to calm her down.

[howwelldoyouknowyourmoon]

Barrytown: We talked to our son “for over 12 hours and he was shaking and vomiting”

Voices of parents of children lost to the moonies 7

March 22, 1976

To whom it may concern:

Our son joined Moon’s group in late 1971 and was coaxed to join by a room-mate. Our son was taking graduate courses. He was a Phi Beta Kappa graduate of a U.S. University in the mid-west. He was definitely idealistic, because he quit his job in his hometown because he felt the institution he worked for charged exorbitant interest rates to under-developed countries.

Mike (this is not his name) has never been home since he joined the group, because we told him we felt he was wasting his life working for Moon. We believe he has been in practically every state in the union, even Alaska, but not Hawaii. We had cards from many places. However, we did visit him twice. We noted the houses were clean where he lived. But I thought the food was not adequate. Both places had an open jar of peanut butter sitting on a table and a loaf of bread. Coffee and tea seemed to be available, but we saw no fresh fruit nor vegetables.

Mail from Mike has been infrequent and short, usually cards. However the very first letter was frightening—rambling and 10 or 12 pages long, trying to tell us why he joined this movement. He talked about the drug problem, the race problem, poverty in the world, etc. And he implied that those who joined this group had all the answers. He never mentioned the name Unification Church nor Moon for over a year after he was in the group.

We seemed to get no Christmas or Easter greetings. One Christmas we got a Christmas greeting with a snow scene. Our family always sent religious cards at Christmas. But Christmas 1974 we got no word at all. Then in February we got word Mike was married by Moon in a mass wedding in Korea. He was married to a German girl we had never heard of.

He said he worked with her in the group for a year, but our daughter, a nurse went to hear one of Moon’s talks the November before and met all the young people with him and this girl was not one of them. So we feel Mike lies to protect Moon. Later (in March) we received a letter from “our daughter-in-law”. She said, “I know you must wonder about your son who went out into the world and married someone you never met before”. But she gave no explanation of this.

Then later we received a letter from our son’s father-in-law from Germany. He and his wife are very good Christian people and they went to the trouble to find a student to write to us in English. They wanted to know about the family now related to their daughter. We immediately told them we did not approve of the Moon Movement and they too said it has been the heartbreak of their lives. She, the daughter-in-law, was still being held in Germany after being flown from Japan in December. They are having visa problems we hear.

Our son was taken back to the States in early November 1995 to Barrytown, N.Y. The father-in-law of our son told us about this and we called for several days before he finally called us back. Then we took a chance on going up to see him, my other son, an ex-Moonie and I, Mike’s mother. The ex-Moonie told him the movement was a big rip-off. We talked to him for over 12 hours and he was shaking and vomiting. It was terrible to see him so programmed that if he broke in the middle of an explanation, he would have to start all over again just like a record. He told us he just read that Franco of Spain died that morning, after we told him he does not read nor listen to TV or radio. Franco, in fact, did not die for several days. Anyway, I stepped into the bathroom for a minute and he fled, because his brother fell asleep. He left his coat and ran out into the rain. We looked for him for a while and then called the ex-Moonie’s mother and she told us to get out of New York quick or we would be arrested. We left and I was so shaken from this experience, I spent 10 days in a mental hospital for my nerves. After witnessing the fear and vomiting, I was relieved to see him go. But later I still cry for what has happened to my intelligent son.

I want to add here too that my son gave Moon $1,400 he had in a local bank. And when he married he defaulted on a state school educational loan. I received a letter about this in January 1975 and I gave the state all the recent addresses I had for my son. My son told me when we saw him November 1975 that he thought Moon paid off his loan. We heard also from a reliable source that Moon charged each person he married $400. Moon now is sending out booklets “Way of World” to presently active Moonie’s parents to make us more understanding. The NERVE he has—we now NEVER get a letter from our son at all. I cannot understand why the U.S. government lets this terrible thing happen to us, the tax paying citizens, and this foreigner with a permanent visa makes fools of us. Someone must be getting paid off. The First Amendment we need, but our judges and law makers administer the law.

Name withheld

_____________________________________

A visit to Ann at Barrytown (1975)

At Barrytown all members must continually strive to lose their identity and become one with Moon’s will (1976)

Ken Sudo and the secret Barrytown 120-day training manual and Unification Church telephone fraud

Physically restrained against his will at Barrytown

Voices of parents of children lost to the moonies 2 Moon’s mass marriages are “a form of sex perversion”

Voices of parents of children lost to the moonies 3 Our son “seemed to be in a bizarre world of science fiction”

Voices of parents of children lost to the moonies 4 “only if she got rid of the baby and gave it up for adoption”

Voices of parents of children lost to the moonies 5 Moon is a man devoid of of human compassion

Voices of parents of children lost to the moonies 6 “One of your ancestors was a peeping Tom.”

Voices of parents of children lost to the moonies 8 Many parents suffered heartbreak after losing their children to the Moonies

[brotherwrites]

The Aspect of a Pleasant Day

"I used to think maybe you loved me now, baby, I'm sure! And I just can't wait 'til the day when you knock on my door! Now every time I go for the mailbox, gotta hold myself down! 'Cause I just can't wait 'til you write me you're coming around!"

You've just gotta love these bright, sunny days we have nowadays! Clear skies, cool wind, the warmth on your face as the sun beams down from on high! Not like the horrid weather we had before, let me tell you. You couldn't walk down the street without getting yourself swept up in some wild tornado, or accidentally stepping into a chasm that you swore wasn't there before. For example; last month, a good friend of mine, a very good friend, informed me over the phone that there wouldn't be any crazy weather planned for that month. He works with weather you see, very good at what he does, quite famous worldwide, so I, as a trustful pal, took his word for gold and went out for some tea.

Now, when you decide to go for an outing, you ought ta' make it a special occasion for yourself, especially if you've made so little time for personal leisure- and you can't ask a person with a bit of self-respect to spend that free time at a local Starbucks for a spot of tea. So I thought I'd take a trip to the United Kingdom to visit one of my favorite places in this world, and I know what you're thinking, aren't plane tickets in America expensive? You'd be absolutely right, not to mention how slow and unreliable they are. The last time I've taken one for the novelty of it, I fell asleep and woke up chest-deep in water! Sooo unreliable in my experience. But not to worry, for I had another friend who helped me in my little venture! You see! When I first met my friend, they invited me into their home, telling me their life story. They were a spiritualist and an aspiring gipsy, who wished to gleam into the secrets of the universe. So I, the generous guest I am, had helped them gather an impressive library of ancient lore, scrolls filled with "lost" languages, and tomes of forbidden secrets. Now they are one of the great names people whisper about! Quirky as they may be nowadays. But they have gained an impressive title!

The Seer of Void, Speaker of Stars.

Ah! I seem to have been caught rambling! Hahaha! My apologies, I'll try to keep it to a minimum.

As I was saying, The Seer owes me a number of favors after I helped them. I used a few, but I still have plenty more, so why not splurge a bit for a nice day! So! After a pleasant chat, my dear speaker sets me up with a small ritual. Ten minutes later, a bit of warping of time and space, and Bob's your uncle, I'm in the Helmsley Walled Garden!

Have you ever been there? It's quite a beautiful place! Fresh spring air, lovely scenery, a welcoming staff, and the part that made it one of my favorites, their Vinehouse Café just a short walk away! Honestly, if one did not have the other, I wouldn't paid this place any mind. So! After giving some of the gobsmacked people around my arrival a cheeky little wave, I made my way down to the little Café where I ordered a cuppa Yorkshire Tea and a bit of nosh to go with it. All in all, I was having a lovely evening when a snowball smashed my cuppa while I was taking a sip, scattering it onto the pavement below, and I was suddenly in the midst of a snowstorm.

As you may imagine, I was not chuffed. In fact, I was bloody mad that my weather-controlling friend told me such rubbish that there was "nothing planned that month."

I, of course, wanted to pay them a surprise visit since they obviously didn't know I was around, considering they were faffing around with the local hero, Earl Gray, when I arrived in their laboratory.

Now my friend, who looked Dodgy, noticed that I was cheesed off, so they tried to give me an earful, but I could tell that they were, if you'd excuse my language, speaking out of their arse, and I was having none of it.

Quieting my gobby bloke, I released Earl Gray, sent them on their way, and had a nice chinwag with the weather for a few days about word choice and how the wrong words can get people you liked hurt.

Truly, we had such terrible weather.

But it's all better now! It has been perfect weather worldwide for weeks, and I don't see that going away anytime soon! Summer just started, it was pleasantly warm instead of the usual blistering heat, the birds were singing a wondrous song and children were laughing in the distance. This could honestly not be a more perfect day! It was so perfect that you can't help but sing!

"Now I'm walking on sunshine, whoa-oh! I'm walking on sunshine, whoa-oh! I'm walking on sunshine, whoa-oh! And don't it feel good! Hey, all right now! And don't it feel good! Hey, yeah!"

Ah, but what I could use is a bit of company, it would be a shame to spend a day like this without a chum around. But I wonder who I should be with. Should it be The Seer? No, no, I've already troubled them enough, besides, they're swamped with work from the beyond. How about The Knight, they are usually free for me. Oh, wait, they are getting married soon with The Sylph this month, making The Sylph equally occupied. Hm! Now this is a conundrum! Perhaps... Oh! Who's that I see? It couldn't be!

"Why, isn't it the Kingdom's favored hero, Earl Gray! What brings you to the States?" I jubilantly asked as I crossed the street to meet them. Earl Gray seems to be dressed down for the occasion, dressed as they were. A finely pressed outfit free of wrinkles, a fine brooch above their left breast, and even a splash of white over their usual shades of gray. The fact that they are not in their working uniform tells me everything I need to know. They are on vacation and decided to go across the pond, as it were, to have a little visit, like I did not so long ago!

"I came to speak to you. I'm doing a casual bit of investigation with my sightseeing, and I noted that you could be helpful." Me? Well then, I was looking for a friend to spend time with, and got an acquaintance, I may as well make the most of it! We found a little café that was owned by a friend of mine, The Maid, so we got cheaper prices, since The Maid and I are such good friends! And, for a few hours, me and my acquaintance spoke on various topics, all skirting around the main topic they truly wanted to talk about, till they finally caved and asked directly "What exactly happened to The Mage of Breath, Boffin of Weather? You were the last person seen with them, were you not?"

"Hm? Oh them! Ah, yes, I've completely forgotten! It seems our little chat had... inspired them to retire, surrendering that title in the process. All their assets were dispersed along with them, so you have no need to worry about where they are." I say as a chuckle slips out. "Ahem. However, I suppose what does concern you is the knowledge that the title of Mage is now open again. Who knows what damage will occur if a completely unknown person gets their hands on it. But don't you worry! I'll do a bit of investigation of my own to make sure this person doesn't make the same mistakes as their predecessor."

"After all," I utter, looking Earl Gray in the eyes, witnessing trepidation under the steel. "I am The Lord of Aspects, Maker of Contracts. It's my job, I can't have people with that kind of power changing the world too much."

You’re a supervillain, but something about your choice of victims puts you low on heroes’ priority lists.

[madhousedarry]

The Omen: Legacy of Lunacy | Chapter 20

Twenty years flew by for Nar-Tai like one night. And although all this time in his head there was nothing but creepy and surreal sticky nightmares, he still did not notice how all these years passed for him as quickly as if he had just gone to sleep for about eight hours and then woken up at eight o'clock in the morning, well, just like in the story, based on which John Carpenter shot his famous film "Aliens Among Us" or "They Live" in the alternative translation of Leonid Volodarsky.

But there was nothing surprising about that. After all, he had spent all those twenty years in suspended animation, lying in a glass bath filled to the brim with liquid nitrogen, and before that, the caring "Doctor Aybolit", who was present when he fell asleep, had given him glycerin to drink, thanks to which his intestines had not rotted during all that time, but were as fresh and fragrant as they had been twenty years ago, heh-heh!

But although for him these twenty years flew by like one night, the process of awakening for Nar-Tai was very painful, since it did not happen all at once, but in four stages ("Omen IV: The Awakening" will not let you lie!).

At first, our brave superhero thought he was in the glaciers, and that even he himself was nothing more than a big piece of ice. Then he began to think that he was no longer an ice cube, but a cauliflower growing in a greenhouse under the rays of the sun.

Then he was finally able to feel a tongue in his mouth, but since he had not yet fully woken up, he thought that it was not actually a tongue, but an icicle that had somehow formed inside his mouth.

And only when he suddenly began to feel how invisible, but at the same time very rough hands began to roll, break, rub and even beat him, he realized that he was he, and that no unusual transformations had happened to his body, and that all his feelings had simply failed him for a while, which had returned to him only now.

He opened his eyes and saw that he was in a huge room with a high ceiling. He was lying on a bed covered with a white sheet, and his chest was hidden under a blanket of the same color. He was lying on his back, and his head was resting on a small, hard pillow.

He tried to move his right arm, but it felt like lead, like a police baton. He tried to move his left arm, but it was in the same condition. Finally, he tried to stand up, but that was beyond his strength.

He realized that he had woken up enough to understand that he was still alive, but not enough to begin living the full life of a healthy thirty-nine-year-old - after all, in suspended animation he had not gained a single extra year! - a man with steel skin and platinum bones, who in his normal state could do anything, but now, alas, he would have to wait until his body, not yet fully awakened from a twenty-year sleep, was ready for new exploits.

In the meantime he had to lie and wait, wait for who knows how long until he was finally able to at least try to assume any other position than "lying on his back." Yes, it was not such an easy task to wake up from a twenty-year sleep, my little green friend!

You probably expected that after sleeping for such a long time, you would immediately jump out of bed like a fresh pickle and burst into cheerful bird trills upon waking up? Fuck you, faggot, go finish first grade, and then take my book in your hands! But for now, sit and study, STUDY, as Grandpa Lenin bequeathed!

What, are you offended by me, my little green friend? So why are you reading my book then, if you are so touchy? But I didn't advise you anything bad, my little green friend! I only said that you should study!

And you're offended, right? Well, fuck you, be offended as much as you want until you burst with anger. And I'll go continue writing my book, I guess. I still have a lot to write before I can finally say with a clear conscience that the book is finished and it's time to push it to print. Or not to print, but to samizdat, but in our time it's all the same crap, which is no sweeter than a radish.

In the meantime, I'll continue writing this chapter so you don't get bored. You've probably already decided that I, Darry Madhouse, suddenly interrupted the story to have a little chat with you. But I didn't.

I just needed to explain a few things about the plot, and you could have easily skipped those paragraphs and moved on to the next one. But since you, my little green friend, didn't do that, you only have yourself to blame! And I, Darry Madhouse… I'll continue writing my book.

So when Nar-Tai realized that he was awake and lying in bed, but he couldn't move his arms or legs, he knew what he had to do. He had to call someone to his bedside to come and explain what was going on.

And along the way, he would tell him what had happened to his friends and when he would finally be able to get out of bed and live like a human being, not a vegetable. And he did it. Namely, he opened his mouth, which, by the way, was quite easy for him to do in his current state, and quietly said:

"Hello, hello, hello! It's already light in the forest!"

And he heard someone approach his bed. Nar-Tai looked up and saw a young and handsome man with Asian slanted eyes and yellow skin. He was wearing a blue short-sleeved shirt, jeans and white sneakers.

There was a sad half-smile on his face, and his whole face expressed compassion mixed with joy, as if he was glad to see a man lying in a hospital bed in front of him, awakened from twenty years of suspended animation, but at the same time he wanted to tell him something that, with a high degree of probability, would spoil his mood.

But the young man was not going to say anything like that just yet. Instead, he just stopped at the head of the bed and said in the pleasant voice of a resident of a southern country called Jopon:

"Have a nice awakening, Mister Tairymbayev!"

Nar-Tai felt so awkward that this young man saw him lying motionless on the bed like a complete loser, that he even blushed in response to these words of the young man, which, strangely enough, immediately returned his good mood, so much so that he - voila! - was able to find the strength to lift his right hand from the sheet!

The young man, noticing that his words had a positive effect on the patient's condition - or was it the patient? - immediately began to shower him with words, as if he hoped to raise Nar-Tai to his feet, as if some kind of spell had taken place here.

"Dad and I couldn't wait for your awakening day. You remember him, my dad?"

"Uh-uh," Nar-Tai drawled, trying to figure out who was standing in front of him now, "who's your dad? And who are you? And where the hell am I anyway?!"

Growing more and more angry with each word, Nar-Tai felt with pleasant surprise that every word, no matter whether he heard it from someone else or said it himself, gave him strength, and by the time he said "where the hell", he had already jumped out of bed, throwing off the blanket along the way and standing before the young man in Adam's costume, who had retreated in horror.

That is, to put it simply, he was naked as a falcon. And if someone hasn't gotten the meaning of these definitions, then we'll have to say it frankly - he was naked. At all. He didn't even have any underwear on.

But it didn't matter to Nar-Tai, who was already so angry that, without even noticing it, he grabbed the young man by the chest and shook him hard, causing him to flounder in his arms like a fish caught out of water. At the same time, his eyes, in which a silent question was frozen, were ready to pop out of their sockets, and a barely audible wheeze came from his mouth.

And only when the young man's face began to change from yellow to blue - the same color as his shirt - did Nar-Tai realize that he was doing something stupid and immediately let go of the young man, causing the latter to fall to the floor, but, to the great relief of both, he did not break, but only got a bump on the crown of his head and immediately sat on his ass, rubbing his neck with his hands.

The young man was very handsome, and Nar-Tai thought that he shouldn't have treated him like that, but he immediately realized that it wasn't his fault - anyone in his place, after waking up from a twenty-year sleep, would have rushed at the first person they met with the desire to count all of his ribs.

And the young man, who seemed to be thinking the same way, was not offended by Nar-Tai, but, having finished massaging his cervical vertebrae, got up from the floor and, having tidied up his blue shirt, which had been crumpled during the squabble, approached Nar-Tai and, looking him straight in the eyes, said:

"Forgive me, Mister Tairymbayev, for treating you like this…" and he hesitated, apparently not knowing what to say.

"Oh, come on, boy," Nar-Tai said peacefully. "It's not your fault that I'm so angry when I wake up. And you, by the way," he looked at the young man more closely, "look a lot like my friend Ando."

At the sound of this name, the young man's lips stretched into a smile, and something resembling pride appeared in his eyes.

Unexpectedly for his interlocutor, he bowed, stood at attention and, without taking his eyes off Nar-Tai and keeping his hands at his sides, said:

"I am his sonnie, Tai Minamoto!" and he bowed again, this time to the ground.

Nar-Tai nodded reflexively in response, but then came to his senses and, assuming a stern expression, said:

"Are you kidding me or something?" he said without malice, but there was steel in his voice. "I remember that that brat wasn't even two days old, and look at you, you're such a warrior, you're at least twenty years old!"

Having said this, Nar-Tai immediately came to his senses - he suddenly remembered that he had spent twenty years in suspended animation, and therefore it was not at all surprising that that naked-assed boy who wet his diapers had grown into a handsome, handsome man during that time.

And Tai, who apparently thought the same thing at that moment, was not offended by Nar-Tai's words and instead laughed conciliatorily.

"Well, yes, once upon a time I really was a bug, but twenty years have passed since then, Mister Tairymbayev!" he said.

Nar-Tai laughed in response, then sat down on the bed, covering his crotch with both hands - for some reason, only at this moment did he realize that all this time he had been standing in front of the young man in Adam's costume.

He remembered that as a child he loved to peek through the keyhole while his father and mother were making love. And now he understood the reason for his strange behavior.

In addition, memories of how, as a child, he loved to look at the place between his mother's legs awoke in his head - and suddenly he realized: it was not just childish curiosity or a desire to see something new for himself, he wanted to look precisely because from an early age his testosterone level was much higher than that of all his peers.

And now, as he sat naked in front of the twenty-year-old boy, he understood that if this continued, he would not be able to stand it and would fuck him in all positions. And to prevent this from happening, he had to do one thing - find something to cover his private parts with.

And Tai, as if reading his thoughts, pulled out a pair of polka-dotted underwear from a chest standing near the bed and threw them to Nar-Tai, who, intercepting them in the air, immediately pulled them on and felt how the treacherous impulse finally left his body.

Now he could communicate with this young man without any fears that he could suddenly break loose and start trampling him like a rooster tramples a hen. And no, Nar-Tai was not gay. He just had this peculiarity of the body - without clothes, he immediately tried to fit his unit into a suitable hole.

And then there was one dick - a man in front of him or a woman - for his body there was no division into the partner's gender, since he grew up in conditions when a person, as a creature, has no gender at all - there is only a soul and the corporeal shell attached to it.

But now this problem has resolved itself, as soon as I put on my underwear.

True, they were a little small and quite noticeably pinched, but at least one could sit calmly next to a handsome young man of twenty years of age and have conversations with him about sublime matters that can only arise where love for all living things reigns.

However, it was necessary to speak about these things carefully, because the young man had probably already managed to hear all sorts of nonsense about gays, pedophiles and other vile individuals, which was why there was a risk that he would misunderstand his, Nar-Tai's, words and run away as fast as he could.

But since this did not happen, Nar-Tai finally allowed himself to relax and begin to attack the young man with questions about what had happened in the world during the entire time he had spent in suspended animation for twenty years.

"So, my dear Tai," said Nar-Tai, sitting on the bed and crossing his arms over his chest, "tell me how things are going? What's new from the outside world? How's, um," Nar-Tai wrinkled his forehead, trying to remember the people he was interested in, "that old geezer, you know, the Colonel…"

"Deadend Graver?" the young man prompted; it was obvious that he was eager to tell everything about everyone. "Comrade Colonel has go out."

"Where did he go?" Nar-Tai didn't understand.

"Let's put it this way," the young man began to choose his words, "Comrade Graver at the moment fully lives up to his name."

"Ah, he's dead, the old faggot!" Nar-Tai exclaimed joyfully. "Serves him right, the hemorrhoidal bastard…"

"In his place now is Boner Ghouler," Tai continued in the meantime, "whom there are rumors in the barracks that he eats guilty recruits for breakfast.

"I shouldn't have said that about my grandfather," Nar-Tai said in a completely different tone. "He was a fine man, a servant to the king, a father to the soldiers…"

It was unclear whether he had suddenly become seriously attracted to Deadend Graver, or whether he had simply pretended to have accidentally blurted out something wrong, but in any case, it made an impression on the young man, who, judging by his appearance, had turned red as a boiled lobster, which, given his yellow skin, was not so easy.

"I didn't know," he said in a timid voice a couple of minutes later, "that you were so close to the deceased," and he began to whine.

Nar-Tai, not knowing what to say, was silent for a few seconds. The situation was extremely awkward for both interlocutors: both felt awkward under each other's gazes and wanted one thing - for this unpleasant conversation to end quickly or at least turn into mutual reconciliation of the parties…

Finally, the silence was broken by the initiator of the conversation himself with his question:

"Okay, my dear Tai, don't shed tears, but rather tell me what happened to the others. For example, how is pan Grijas, who twenty years ago so kindly gave me a bottle of glycerin to drink when I was lowered into a bath of liquid nitrogen, doing?"

He thought that this question would calm the young man down, but he only seemed to become more upset.

"Oh, Mister Tairymbayev, why did you mention Albertas Vislovdovichus for no reason? - the boy almost cried."

"Uh-uh," Nar-Tai drawled, "so he's also, um-m…"

"Yes, Mister Tairymbayev, twenty years have passed, and when they put you in liquid nitrogen, he was already eighty-two years old…"

"Well, yes," nodded Nar-Tai, "few people live to be a hundred and two, except for whores… But let's not whine, let's have a man-to-man chat, remembering someone else, do you mind?" and, without waiting for the young man's answer, he immediately got ahead.

"How is your sister, Kari Minamoto, doing? I still remember how eight… No, TWENTY-EIGHT years ago she pissed all over me when I, while visiting your daddy, decided to take his newborn baby girl in my arms…"

"Oh," Tai immediately stopped crying, "my sister is already married! Now her name is Kari Kamiya and she already has three children, and her whole family is happy, like no other!"

"So, you see, there is happiness in the Universe, as long as a man is alive!" Nar-Tai exclaimed joyfully, approvingly patting the boy on the shoulder. "And how is Anton Skovorodnikov, who helped me immerse myself in a bath of liquid nitrogen, pan Grijas - Antichrist rest his soul?"

"Not everything is all right here," the guy immediately became serious. "He was brought to this lousy Analda by some evil spirit, where he ran off to when he stupidly fell in love with some forty-two-year-old cunt with some idiotic last name - either Whoreira or Vagineira, it doesn't really matter. But the main thing is," Tai continued, his eyes seeming to sparkle with anger, "that this cunt of our poor Skovorodnikov went and handed him over to the authorities there, and now poor Anton is sitting in a stinking Analdian prison, where he is tortured every day for secret information about what arsenals our army has and how many soldiers it has."

"Yeah, the guy was unlucky, he was lured by an old whore with her painted cunt," Nar-Tai shook his head. "And you don't know why he suddenly fell in love with her so much that he forgot about everything and rushed from Pet-el-burge to lousy Analda?"

"How could I not know, when in the barracks everyone talks about nothing else! - the young man exclaimed in his heart. - I understood from the very beginning that the man was lost when he started on the Internet…

"Wait, wait, my friend, not so fast," Nar-Tai stopped him. "Let's tell me everything about Anton Skovorodnikov in order, okay?"

"It's coming," the young Joponese man agreed with him.

Nar-Tai nodded in approval, and the young man, having calmed down a little, continued his story.

[moonlit-imagines]

Just a Name

Bruce Wayne x reader

warnings: the batman spoilers, injury, blood, drugs, needles, death, i think that’s it

a/n: changed the plot just a bit to make more sense. matt reeves let me write the next batman movie. also to anon: 💖💖💖

prompt: anonymous: “so the reader and batman have been working together for a while but reader doesn't know his identity (for now) and batman is badly injured so they try to drive him to the hospital because there's no way they're letting him die but he refuses to go there and ask that they take him to the wayne tower instead bc there at least he can keep his identity a secret so the reader drives there and goes with him in the elevator and leaves him with alfred and they put the pieces together concerning his identity, and maybe they get to see him without his mask when he's better?”

Help was scarce in Gotham. At least, the help that made a difference. Two vigilantes among Gotham found themselves needing each other’s help every once in a while, you and the Batman found you worked well together when the situation called for it.

And tonight it did. You found yourselves at the same crime scene with a swarm of cops buzzing about the place, but the two of you walked together finding whatever forensic evidence might help you with the case. “Batman,” you drew his attention near window, a fresh etching in the wooden windowsill that seemed to be a calling card of sorts, “does this mean anything to you?” You stared at five lines and the shavings that were left behind.

“Tally marks.” He said, taking a closer look. There were four vertically, one diagonally. Same number of victims found in the house.

“Another serial killer on our hands?” You asked, waving Detective Gordon over for a closer look at the discovery.

“It looks that way.” He backed up with you and made another round on the scene. “You’re helping?”

“Was that a question or a command?” You checked the time on the clock nearby, staring at it a few seconds too long. Last serial killer this city had brought it to ruins, worst week of your life. You made a wish at 11:11pm, please don’t cause another catastrophe. “I’m in. Let’s get this over as soon as possible, agreed.” He grunted and led the way out of the house, which you were surprised at. “Hey, are you just done looking around in there?”

“I have a lead.” Batman kept walking away from you and opened the passenger door of the Batmobile, abandoning it for his side. You paused your steps and stared at him, who caught your protest just before crawling into the driver’s seat. “Are you coming?”

“I show you my clues, why can’t you show me yours?” You scoffed and settled for the ride in the Batmobile, at least he trusted you enough for that. “You don’t trust me very much, do you?”

“No. Why?” He bluntly answered, pressing harder on the gas pedal.

“We’ve just worked together for a while and I don’t know who you are.” Silence filled the car for a few moments, you hated when he declined to respond. Make things awkward. “Did you fall asleep?”

“You haven’t told me who you are.” He retorted, making you roll your eyes.

“I’ve shown you my face.” You said.

“I didn’t ask you to do that.” He stomped on the brakes and parked his peculiar car on the dark street. “We’re here.”

“Where exactly is ‘here?’” You took a careful look of your surroundings, but it was just like any other street in Gotham. Dirty, bleak, and miserable. “Can you fill me in on your lead yet? I thought you knew working together meant sharing your knowledge.”

“Stay here.” He stepped out and locked you inside before you even got the chance to try and follow him. You knocked on your window a few times and watched Batman disappear into the building.

“God, he sucks.” You muttered to yourself and fell back into your seat. “I could have done this on my own. Maybe next time.” It took about twenty minutes for Batman to come back to the car, and you had much to say to him. “You really need to work on your people skills. Sorry I’m not Gordon, but I’m still a parter. Mind telling me what that was all about?”

“I’ve seen markings like those at other crime scenes, but never more than four.” Batman explained as he pulled back onto the road.

“And you’ve been keeping track of them because..?” You peered over and noticed his jaw clench and put the pieces together. “Because you thought they were scratch marks from your cat friend.” He huffed in response, confirming your suspicions as you smiled to yourself and quietly awaited a destination. Which happened to be a street corner near your hideout.

“Get out.” He instructed, catching your glare. “Now.”

“I was joking about the cat girl, by the way.” You pushed the door open with your foot and left, hearing him peel out seemingly before your feet reached the ground. “Sensitive much?” You muttered, stomping into the alley among the trash and rats and heading back to base. It was frustrating how uncooperative he could be, but you had work to do, work of your own. Hopefully this serial killer wouldn’t be as much as a hassle as the last one.

—————

It took two more days to hear anything back from him. And when you did, you actually got scared. He’d given you a beeper for emergencies and neither of you had used it until now. The location pinged to your computer and you rushed out the door, thinking over all the possibilities for the call. Was he in too deep? Batman, really?

The ride on your motorcycle was swift, but the GPS marker had moved since you left. Batman was escaping from whatever danger he was in. Or leading you to something you didn’t want any part in. Once you were close enough, you slowed down to try and spot the man dressed like a bat, and sure enough, he was hiding in an alley. Leaned against a dumpster, the most comically feared man-thing was panting, clutching his stomach, and fading in and out. You rushed to his aid, tapping his cheek to get him to focus. “Batman, it’s me. Hey, wake up. What the hell happened?” You asked and his eyes rolled back slightly. “Batman!” You shook him by the shoulders.

“Drugged…” He mumbled, barely audible.

“Shit…I gotta get you to a hospital.” You attempted to lift him, but he protested your words strongly when you tried.

“No! No…hospitals. Take me…my base.” He instructed and you shook your head.

“I don’t know where that is, Bat.” You reasoned with him as he faded in and out, breathing harder from the affects of whatever he’d been given. You noticed blood on his face, a few cuts. He’d been through the wringer, but mustered up the energy to move and fish into his belt pocket for a set of keys.

“Location is marked. Here.” He handed you the keys to that beast of a car and you’d be lying if you said that didn’t excite you, but this city couldn’t lose the Batman tonight, they’d be doomed without him. So you lifted his arm over your shoulder and hoisted him up, letting him direct you to his parking spot. You threw him in the passenger seat and sped out of there as fast as you could, setting his GPS for base.

“Hang in there, Batman. I’ll get you where you need to go.” You assured him and watched him reach for a button near the screen. An alert for whoever was waiting for him. A few sharp turns later, you were pulling into a hidden entrance, an abandoned train line with the name “Wayne” marked all over it. This place hadn’t been used in years, it was a clever hideout, didn’t look half bad either. You stopped the car and hopped out, dragging Batman out and being met by a nicely dressed Englishman who pulled him onto a gurney.

“He say what happened to ‘im?” The man asked and you nodded.

“He said he was drugged.” You told him as the masked man groaned loud, nearly screaming in pain. “Are you a doctor?”

“I’m whatever he needs me to be.” He rushed around the area, getting medical supplies in order to treat him, but he’d need to get the suit off of him first. “I think it’d be best if you left. Thank you for all you’ve done.” You shook your head in response, already putting everything together.

“Not going to happen. I’m sorry, but I’d like to help.” You protested and the man grew more upset.

“I’m afraid you can’t, you’d best be on your way.” He was losing precious time, it seemed, but this was dire.

“It’s because of his mask, isn’t it?” You asked, motioning to the room right after. “Do you take me for an idiot? I’ll save you the trouble, that’s Bruce Wayne. The same Bruce Wayne whose family owned this structure, who has the money for all these gadgets and machines, who has a butler for christ’s sake!” Your shouts echoed throughout the underground. “Trust me, pull off the mask.” You took off your facial coverings and decided to level the uneasy ground. “My name is y/n l/n. Any more problems?”

“Alfred Pennyworth.” He introduced himself. “Now that we’re acquainted, would you like to help me get this crap offa ‘im?” Alfred began trying to loosen the armor, and once he saw what he was working with, he was a bit shaken. “Oh, dear.” He gasped at Bruce’s pale, sweaty skin and the dark lines in his veins. “Mx. l/n, please grab me some ice from the cooler over there.” You were asked as he felt Bruce’s burning forehead, his breathing now much more shallow.

“On it.” You ran to where he pointed and found ice packs within, grabbing three and running back.

“Much appreciated.” He grabbed them and set one on Bruce’s forehead, and one under each of his arms. “That should cool him down.” He sighed, still very much on edge. “You know how to draw blood?”

“No…” You replied.

“Well, you’re about to find out.” He pulled out the kit and set in on a sterile cart, starting to explain himself. “We can test his blood right here and now to see what that bastard hit him with, that way we’ll know how to treat him. You just watch me, it’s a good skill to have.”

“Okay,” you nodded, watching as he turned Bruce’s arm over, tied a band on his upper arm, and cleaned a select spot, “hope you aren’t squeamish.” The sterile needle was taken from the packaging and stuck into his arm. “See the angle I did that at? Got to get the right vein.” You watched the reddish-black liquid run down the tube into a vial, it took a few moments, but once that one was full, Alfred passed it on to you. “There’s a machine beside that computer with a port for this little guy, set it in there and press the button, it’ll start the process.” You understood that much and did as your were told.

“How’s he doing temperature-wise?” You asked while doing your task.

“A bit better, not much.” He felt Bruce’s still warm cheeks and shook his head. “You know anything else about what happened tonight?”

“Can’t say that I do.” You stared at the loading screen as it analyzed the blood sample, but when you turned around, you saw the butler pull one of Bruce’s eyes open and reach for his eye. “Woah! What are you doing?!”

“Don’t be worried, my friend. He’s got a contact lens, records everything he sees. This should help us a bit.” The little lens was pinched between his two fingers and brought over to you, you watched as he set it on a separate machine and another monitor came to life. “Say about…an hour and a half ago?” He scanned back and started the recording, which was right where the struggle for Bruce was. One man, just the one was attacking him, which surprised you greatly. Not many could get the jump on Batman, but this guy, he looked crazy.

“My god, are those…those are scars, aren’t they?” You squinted at the unhinged man. The video paused and you zoomed into the man’s bare chest with the same markings from the windowsill a few days ago. “That’s the serial killer he was tracking, it has to be. But…that’s so weird. He’s definitely giving himself those scars.”

“You’re surprised by this? How long have you been in this line of work?” Alfred asked you.

“Yeah, yeah, I guess it isn’t that crazy for Gotham. Still…it’s unsettling.” You stared at the screen, looking at the man’s terrifying expression before the blood machine processed the sample, beeping a reply.

“Oh, great.” Alfred said to the computer and popped an empty vial next to the blood, then hooked it up to yet another machine. “This is the neat part. It’s making an antidote. Just gotta see what it needs…” He read off the ingredients from the screen and connected a few corresponding jugs to start the process. “Should only take a few more minutes.”

“You seem less on edge now.” You told him.

“Yes, well, things are starting to fall into place. Thank you for your help.” He tiredly smiled and went to the freezer for new icepacks. “Do you have somewhere to be?”

“Not at the moment, no. I can stay until he’s awake…if that’s alright with you.” You stood up from the seat you’d taken and walked near Bruce again, checking his light pulse.

“Stay as long as you’d like, won’t hurt me. Plus, I could use the company. Don’t get much of it.” Alfred tended to Bruce and as a few minutes passed, the machine pinged. “Ah, here we are.” He swiped the vial and added it to a syringe. “He might toss around a bit, it shouldn’t be an issue. Just step back.” Alfred injected the antidote and waited a few seconds, then Bruce jolted his body and let out a long scream, making you cringe at his pain. He’d been through enough for one night. After a few seconds passed, his body had relaxed and you felt at ease, too. “Well, now we just let him rest, he’ll be up soon. I’ll go make us some tea.” Alfred left the room and you found yourself alone in the Batman’s “man-cave.” It was a neat setup, much better than your basement apartment at a dead-end alley. You could never afford all this equipment. Or a butler. Man, a butler would be cool, though. Especially this guy.

A while later, Bruce came back to reality, turning his head sideways and seeing you. “You’re alive.” You smiled and walked over to him, who suddenly became aware that his face was showing.

“You know who I am.” He was disappointed, it sounded like it.

“It wasn’t hard to figure out after I got here. Nice setup.” You complimented, but he wasn’t very happy at the moment. “I’m y/n l/n. You’re Bruce Wayne. Now we both know who the other is.”

“That’s just a name…Where’s Alfred?” He asked, struggling to get himself up.

“Went upstairs for a refill on tea.” You answered him. “Hey, no ‘thank you’ or anything? I kind of saved your life.” Bruce walked past you and to the computer, limping on the way over. He was only concerned with what happened before he blacked out, concerned with the madman on the loose. “Is that really important right now? You almost died, you need to get some rest.”

“Thank you for your help. You can leave now.”

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