#I feel like some stuff just happened the way it did because of Plot and it didn’t really need to..
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☕how the writers delt with river song
SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP THEY DID MY GIRL SO DIRTY there are so many. good river song moments. and there are so manythat make me want to tear a strip off steven moffat like every goddamn episode with her they have to make some obnoxious sex joke or some Honey Im Home type shit & i understand this is like. A Moffat Theme & i dont always hate it but goddddd its so reductive like there is so much!!!! that could be done with her character !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that is overshadowed by haha what if she was sexy like STOPPPPPPPPPPPP.
like silence in the library was a really good character lead in & i like her!!! as a character !!!! even the overly flirtatiousness unfortunately that would work on me but even aside from that. she is a good character let down but the sheer pull-it-out-of-your-ass writing of her backstory. like?? she could regenerate cos she was conceived in the tardis okay thats really cool much weirder stuff has happened when it comes to tardises & making babies but then WE SeE THIS FOR LIKE. ONE OR TWO EPISODES BEFORE THEYRE LIKE WHOOPS THAT DOESNT WORK ACTUALLY COS SHE'S DEAD UHHH SHE BETTER UHMM IDK SAVE TH E DOCTOR OR SOMETHING WHATEVER> COS HER ENTIRE LIFE HAS TO REVOLVE AROUND HIM. HASHTAG MARRIAGE AMIRITE like even the fact that her entire life was shaped around him isnt a Bad Idea it just feels like no one considered the tragic impies (implications) of this, & simultaneously doing amy so dirty in the process as well like??? she loses baby mels & then discovers she was her (never previously mentioned) childhood friend but then she uhhhh dies & turns into this woman you already know and them????? barely eveer mention it again???? holy shit?????????????????????? amy & river is a freaking horror story but one that the writers seem imcapable of dealing with because sOMEONE is too busy making obnoxious jokes about married life
a lot of thsi is specific to the General Vibes of the eleven era stuff as well which was in general so so weird about women & while its not like twelve or any of teh other doctors are expemt from this eleven is a massive dick to people quite a bit & a lot of this falls on river b/c he is seemingly (iirc i havent seen some of this stuff for a while though it Haunts Me) almost careless? with her? like a sort of 'welllllll she's here now so it was all okay in the end :)' sort of attitude ignoring that she went through A Fuckton Of Stuff before she was even a concious human(mostly??) being
even the husbands of river song is tragically guilty of some of that stuff like. she's seen some wild shit & she should have known it was twelve wayyyyyy way way quicker. like i understand why she didnt for plot reasons but she is in fact very intellegent like. she's allowed to show that. unfortunatley sometimes women cant be smart & have their boobs out at that same time I GUESSSSSSSSS
also the nine & river audios from earlier this year? i really like archipelago i listened to that a couple of times & i thought it was really powerful but AGAIN the writers make river So Fucking Obsessed With Romance like. you'd let it go by that point. nine had literally just proved he's the most aro guy in the universe (good for him) and shes stillllllll flirting at him. which. imo she wouldnt do anymore because, shock horror, she does actually like him as a person & values his company and you would think you would be friends wit hthe guy YOU ARE GONG TO MARRY OR WHATEVER. NOT THAT THEIR MARRIAGE WAS PARTICULARLY ROMANTIC EITHERIM GONNA BE SO REAL. obviously sex is important to her & good for her but yikes. it doesnt need to be mentioned so often.
like its the whole 'inherent tragedy of waiting for a time traveller' stuff which i do eat up every time meeting her in silence of the library & knowong that there is so much more there - VERY COMPELLING !! really good character intro augahagaauuaajaaajahhahahahhhh but nooooo her Entire Fucking Goddman Life has to revolve around being manipulated & The Doctor AS WELL AS !! the completely uncalled for ohhhh im a PSYCHOPATH ( <- unfounded & demonstrably untrue lowkey this is saneism right. thats an ableism there yes? ) thing they alllwaysssss have her say like well!! shes not !! theres 'youre talking about commiting a murder'/'no im not, i'm actually commiting a murder' which i like & is funny & she would say that and then theres teh vauge oooohhhhh im so Freaky & I Have A Gun or whatevr like augsugsaihuahahaouoauauoouauoauoauoauuo
also twelve & river had freaky t4t bi4bi aroallo sex after the end of husbands of river song but no actual dw writer is enlightened enough to see that because they have to flatten her into The Doctors Wife & she would have had a far better dynamic with 12 than with 11 (not that i'm biased) i wish they got more time togetherrrrrrrrrrr also you should listen to the bekdel test (diary of river song audio with missy)
#tldr river song is a character i love very much however she had the grave misfortune of being written in the mid 2010s by steven moffat#anyways. sorry yikes this got long im so sorry i dindt realise i had this much to say. wow#doctor who#thanks for the ask!!#this is not. very flattering of elevens era if are are emotionally attached to him you may want to skip this one <3#jordan tag :D#river song
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I have been Processing My Feelings mostly through sleeping a lot (thanks, shark week), cleaning (so much stuff to be done, especially when you're on a budget so everything takes twice as much work), playing Pokemon Go (I SAW AN ARTICUNO, but it fled on me ): but that's okay, I know it only has like a 3% chance to get it, and if I saw one, maybe I'll see another sometime), and binging TV shows/YouTube videos. TV SHOWS THAT I HAVE HAD THOUGHTS ON: - FROM, season 3: I think it might have been a mistake to watch it week to week, because I've watched seven episodes now and it feels like hardly anything has happened this season, like, you only have ten episodes and the wait between seasons is so long! Get back to moving the plot forward! But a lot of people said the same thing about s2 and I found that one to move along great--but I binged the whole thing, so the pacing probably seemed better. I'm still invested, some emotional stuff has happened this season, but I want more answers/plot already!!!! - SHRINKING, season 2: Just as much of a comfort watch as the first season, still pulling a bunch of laughs out of me. The cast is incredible, the writing is funny (I'm a sucker for a Bill Lawrence show, though), and I have had genuine emotional reactions to some of the storylines this season, because I have come to care about the characters. It can be a light watch most of the time, one to put on when I want something to laugh at, but it can pack a punch in the way it needs to. - ENGLISH TEACHER: I think every episode got me to laugh at least once, most of them got me to laugh out loud multiple times. Some people are going to find it kind of preachy or tryhard, but I felt like it was trying to take an honest look at this one person's attempts to navigate the difficult societal elements at play (being gay in your 30s, no longer a kid, not a boomer, but not always seeing eye-to-eye with where the younger generation is, wanting to do the right thing versus not always knowing what that is, trying to be empathetic while being genuine, etc.), and if nothing else it got me with the sideswipe at Tumblr. That hurt, you guys, but also LOL. - 9-1-1, season 8: Still very much worth watching (especially every time Eddie is a hot mess and kind of a bitch, I've never loved him more), but I did not enjoy the Councilwoman Ortiz storyline (it felt more mean-spirited than I wanted) and I'm not looking forward to catching up on this week's episode (I've heard some of what happens), but overall, it's still a comfort place for batshit storylines. BEENADO WAS HILARIOUS, everything about Athena on the plane was fun (and less frustrating than her usual cop storylines, I love you, girl, but oh my god), and I even liked the Gerrard storyline by the end. Next to catch up on: Abbot Elementary, binge Squid Game s2 when it comes out, and finally watch The Devil Judge. (Watch, I'll have my schedule all planned out and then probably throw it out the window for Grotesquerie or something, SIGH.) Any other suggestions for comfort shows or just really bingeable recent shows or just tell me what you're watching, so that I can keep my brain off the doomscrolling track!
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Out of curiosity, why do you dislike Midnight Mass? It's really like hear your opinions.
it's just so fucking BORING!! the concept is interesting i do find the concept interesting (vampire priest who believes his vampirism is a gift from god) but somehow it was done in the least interesting way possible. sometimes there's like a minute where i thought "holy shit is it finally gonna get better" and then i watched the next episode and it continued to be exactly the same.
all the characters are basically exactly the same. i know it's by monologue flanagan but can they at least monologue in DIFFERENT ways??? dear god. he edited it himself and you can REALLY tell. the fucking ten minute scene that's just "what do you think happens after we die? vcnvncmrnwbvnjef vdmnnc cmnennwneetnewnnwbefnbrtnbemrbermnbmrbtrtbwnrebeb" is crazy who thought that was a good idea. god every character was so forgettable i think i remember like 4 names. genuinely i see people talking about a character and i have to look them up and i STILL don't remember them. don't get me started on the fucking therapy speak. also riley flynn is the most boring protagonist i've ever seen i can't think of a single personality trait he has. i can barely think of ANY personality traits ANY characters have.
i know we shit on his adaptations a lot (as we should) and at the very fucking least he didn't ruin another excellent work of horror with midnight mass but he is NOT a good writer with his own stuff either!! it's so BLAND. even when it's not boring it's bland and uninteresting. i know i'm biased i know i watch extreme horror to find artistic value in underlooked pieces of media so i'm used to "that freak shit" but he did nothing!!! he did nothing with his vampire priest! he was literally irrelevant by the end because he gave that antagonist role to some other character and he was never really the protagonist either. he was just there for a really dumb late-game romance plot/plot twist.
it's such an unbearable show and the ending isn't even good!!! its tone is so fucking weird like everyone dies and yet there's still a weirdly hopeful tone to it. i feel like that's a moment to REALLY lean into the tragedy. it doesn't have a happy ending but it also doesn't let you feel sad enough for it to be truly tragic.
also there's like three different types of vampire in the show and it makes NO sense why they're so different from each other. i'm not asking for extensive lore i'm just asking for consistency.
it's like 8 hours long and i know i've probably spent way more than that complaining about this fucking show but still a waste of my time. it just sucks so much. it could have been an okay movie but as a whole show it's so dragged out and doesn't DO anything with those eight hours. i don't mind a slow burn i really don't but a) the build up has to be worth something and b) it has to have something really really good at the end of the build up.
honestly it looks SO good in gifs and screenshots and fanart that it makes me wish the show was better because you could have a much better experience just looking at those and imagining a good show than actually watching it.
on the plus side if you DO watch the actual show riley's death scene is the funniest shit in the whole thing.
#asks#anti mike flanagan#i don't know if you've seen it actually but thank you for the ask i enjoyed ranting#that ten minute scene haunts me. it was so awful
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Actual lengthy reply time finally (sorry this took me literally forever)
Yeah I did not want Leo to be alone right after this, and I didn’t want Piper to be alone with it either. Canon may refuse to let them go to Jason’s funeral, but I will let them grieve together, damn it!
The backstory/pre-plot part actually ended up being quite a bit more than just a prologue, it’s the first few chapters, but I hope it’ll still feel well-paced and fitting when we get around to the rest of them! I wanted to take the time to get into all the feelings and set up/resolve some stuff, plus sticking to the ToA timeline I had to get to the point where Apollo is back on Mount Olympus, which takes a minute. Most of it is relevant and will be back to haunt Leo later!
Responding to the bullet points by putting the relevant numbers in front (not sure why it apparently changed all of yours to 1. in this reblog, they’re correct if I look at your post?? Very strange)
2. Yep! Leo not feeling loved/worthy of love was a huge deal in HoO, and all canon did was put a girlfriend on it and pretend we’re good now, but we will not be doing that here! Leo will learn to recognize that he’s loved, and if it’s the last thing he does :)
4. This bugged me so much in HoO you have no idea. I actually kind of prefer HoO to pjo just because I adore all the characters, but plot wise it’s all over the place and we really miss out on a bunch of friendship stuff because it’s so focused on all the love triangles. I need more platonic Argo bonding!! Let them all be buddies!!
5. This is partially me being demiromantic but many if not all my favorite ships are characters that have strong platonic bonds first. Something something marrying your best friend. I also feel like Leo and Jason both took forever to realize they were into each other (Leo grumbling about Jason constantly being hot in his general vicinity being the reason why he doesn’t have a girlfriend will always crack me up, lol, and Jason spent so long doing what he thought he was supposed to/what was expected of him, including his relationship with Piper, that he didn’t really get to stop and properly have a sexuality crisis for ages) so I wanted to re-establish that for the fic, especially since valgrace fics are kind of split on whether they have jiper happen and break up like they did in canon or just never have them date at all
6. I couldn’t resist sneaking that one in. Insert lame Apollo dodgeball Leo Valdez joke LMAO
7. <3
That’s such a smart way to put it!! Leo is dealing with a lottt and we’re going to get into it a bit more in future chapters but yeah he’s definitely avoiding talking about some of it (in both the way that we the audience don’t see all of it and in him and Piper actively coping via distracting themselves and not talking about some of it)
Honest confession: I really struggle with Shel. I’m glad she exists, but she’s basically an OC when you try to work with her in fanon, because she really only exists to confirm Piper is sapphic and canon gives us absolutely no information on her. I know she’s Cherokee, I know she’s sapphic, I know she likes hiking and I think she has a piercing? That’s it. She’s just kind of a nothing character, which is fine in the books but makes it very hard to work with her in fanon content. Can we have at least a little additional input on her please? 🤲
Glad you think that works well!! Especially because I actually don’t find myself that funny? Though I think it probably helps that I’ve got a general tendency to get attached to traumatized joke coping characters, so I’m pretty familiar with it conceptually. The last book series I fixated on also did this a lot (intense explorations of grief briefly interrupted by memes LOL)
The audience knows stuff!! But Leo was not around for that! And he’s processing a lot at the moment but that just really makes it sink in how much he missed, both because he was gone for so long and also when he was there but so caught up in his own problems (and especially in seeing how “happy” Piper and Jason were apparently without him, because again Leo doesn’t feel worthy of love and has spent a lot of time in foster families who weren’t that great and made him feel like they’d eventually decide they didn’t want him anymore) that he didn’t see the cracks that Piper now tells him were there basically for the whole relationship. So yeah it’s a shock. On a lot of levels. But it’s a lot less earthshaking than the shock of Jason being gone, and therefore easier to focus on. The Piper related changes may or may not also hit him sometime in the near future ;)
Quotes section (please just in general know I’m delighted you did this it brings me suchhh joy to see what bits touched my readers the most):
-No spoilers, but I will say there’s a reason the fic starts out with memories of Esperanza. And yeah, the whole Jason situation is tearing open a lot of old wounds, specifically because of how similar it is: a situation Leo was unable to do anything to change that he feels responsible for (even though, realistically speaking, he isn’t). A loved one that got ripped away from him far too soon that he never got the chance to say goodbye to. A kind of desperate ache that nothing is ever going to fix.
I have a couple of grievances with ToA, and the way none of Jason’s loved ones are allowed to stay mad at Apollo is definitely one of them. Like, it’s established Jason died because of Apollo’s broken Styx prophecy! We’re told that’s the reason it happens!! Piper is the only one who gets to be mad at him at all, and even then she’s only upset for a single scene and has forgiven Apollo the next time they meet. Grief can be messy and nasty and people lash out sometimes! Not everyone needed to immediately be totally fine with the fact that Apollo got Jason killed!
-Glad you enjoyed that joke! I’m not super good with machinery so I worried I’d struggle with working that part into his narration but there’s some references to it I’m actually really happen with, and this is one of them :)
-Something something Leo is of the opinion that Piper should hate him how he hates himself! Also in this context, feeling a little evil about the fact that one of the reasons Leo doesn’t go to the Camp Jupiter funeral is that he thinks everyone would blame him for Jason’s death. The reality of it is that they wouldn’t! But when his mom died his aunt did blame him and so he automatically assumes that this time everyone will look at him and see that same blame written all over his face.
-English being my third language (technically second language going off of how well I actually speak it, I learnt French first but my French is shit lol), I’m really glad to hear it haha
-All of their lives are fucking weird, it’s a demigod thing, but Leo’s almost got everyone beat just based on the fact that the Queen of the Gods went out of her way to come babysit him. It’s even funnier because I’m pretty sure none of the others know this except for Piper and Jason. I wish we’d seen him tell Percy and Annabeth, I feel like that would have been a very funny interaction.
-There is something related to Leo in that box, which may or may not be something I’ve mentioned on this blog before ;)
-Unfortunately for Leo, there’s a bit more stuff he has to deal with before the Plot can start. For instance, the fact that he is (theoretically) in a relationship right now.
I’m so so glad you enjoyed this!! I’ve read and reread your comment a whole bunch of times now, and every time I do I get this huge grin on my face. This is the kind of comment i don’t get a lot but that when I do get it I’ll treasure literally forever. You made my whole month with this and it’s made me very excited to get back to the fic (which between exam phase and hospital stuff I haven’t gotten to work on nearly as much as I hoped lately)
The choiceless hope in grief
Summary: Leo Valdez has lived and died for the gods. Their war has shaped his life since he was a baby. With Gaia defeated, he sort of hopes he can finally rest. He has friends and some semblance of home to return to for the first time since he was eight years old. Just this once, he allows himself to hope the good things might stick.
But the gods aren’t done with them just yet, by the time Leo finds his way back, Jason is gone.
This time, Leo decides he’s done just taking the Fates’ bullshit lying down. If getting his best friend back means striking a deal with the gods and venturing into the Underworld… well, it’s probably not even the most reckless thing he’s ever done.
The caveat of said deal? He has to trust Jason will follow him, or his self-doubt will doom them both.
And after the life he’s lived, Leo is so intricately familiar with self-doubt that he could probably trademark the word.
Or: The only possible way for Orpheus to succeed is if he learns to think of himself as a person worth loving.
Word Count for chapter 1: ~5k
Rating: Teen and Up
So! *claps hands together* I’ve been threatening you guys with my Orpheus Eurydice valgrace fic for a while! Technically I wanted to wait to post this until I’m completely done writing the fic, and I mostly intend to stick to that! I’m only posting this now because I have a minor surgery tomorrow and I’d rather be anxious about fic related things than about the surgery in question. So, take this chapter as a preview of sorts, more to come soon-ish but probably not immediately!
A couple of important notes before we start:
-TW for suicidal ideation. It’s less Leo actually wanting to die and more his canon behavior of “I’m doing something extremely reckless that might succeed but if it doesn’t, my death is an acceptable consequence”, paired with general grief related self-loathing, but if you think you’re not in the right headspace to read about that, come back when you are or at least tread carefully. This fic pics up at the end of The Burning Maze, so especially the beginning is pretty heavy on the grief stuff.
-Since ToA is vaguely canon to this fic, Leo and Calypso are technically dating in the beginning, but they don’t really interact positively as a couple (honestly they don’t interact that much in general) and break up pretty early on. Just be aware in advance that they’re still together for a little bit.
-Fic title is from Talk by Hozier which is maybe a painfully obvious pick but it was too perfect for me not to use it.
Chapter 1: Leo and Piper have an extended sleepover
It wasn’t a discussion between Leo and Piper whether or not to go to Jason’s funeral. They came to the decision that they wouldn’t silently—or as silently as one could come to an agreement when all parties involved were sobbing.
Maybe it should have been a discussion. There was a part of Leo that worried he’d regret this later—his refusal to take this chance to say goodbye and let himself grieve.
But Leo remembered his mother’s funeral. Remembered the way his aunt Rosa had looked at him like she knew his mother’s death had been his fault. Leo couldn’t stand the thought of people looking at him like that again.
He also didn’t remember his mother’s funeral bringing him any sense of closure or comfort. He’d stood at her grave, afterwards, just as desperate and afraid and utterly inconsolable as he’d been before the funeral, except it had suddenly felt sickeningly final. The wound it had torn in his soul had kept bleeding for years, and the scars would stay forever. He didn’t need any of Apollo’s shitty oracles to know Jason’s death would be exactly the same.
At this point, Leo was pretty sure his sanity was being held together by a combination of jokes and a truly questionable amount of duct tape.
Beyond all that, though, Camp Jupiter was a battlefield right now. It would continue to be a battlefield for the foreseeable future.
Leo wasn’t a coward. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to go back and help. But one of his best friends was already in a box, and there was no way in hell he’d risk the other.
With how tightly Piper was clinging to him, maybe she was thinking the same thing.
For all his big talk about dragon escorts, Festus did most of the actual escorting on his own, occasionally torching what Leo hoped were monsters and not random public monuments. Leo, for his part, spent most of the journey crammed into the backseat of the car next to Piper, sandwiched between her and a bunch of moving boxes that seemed determined to flatten him into a Leo-shaped pancake whenever they took a sharp turn.
He’d spent so long thinking about seeing her and Jason again.
He’d talked Calypso’s ear off about them the whole journey, to the point where it had clearly started to annoy her. He’d thought about various ridiculous entrances he could make, and the fact that he’d probably get yelled at, but he’d also thought about sitting together by the campfire, sharing nachos. He’d thought about Jason hugging him so fiercely that he couldn’t breathe, and Piper cussing him out while she held him, making him promise never to do anything that reckless again.
Now Piper was actually holding him, and Leo couldn’t feel anything. There was a numbness in his chest. He wasn’t sure he had it in him to ever feel happiness again. Hell, even if he did, what was the fucking point? Every time anything even remotely good happened in his life, it got ripped away from him again.
They didn’t talk a whole lot for most of the drive. They cried until it felt like they couldn’t anymore, clinging to each other like desperate children.
Even if they’d wanted to talk about what had happened, Piper’s dad was right there, and despite the Mist usually working overtime for them, having him overhear seemed like a gamble. Or, well, maybe that was what Leo told himself. Maybe he just wasn't sure he was ready to hear it all. He still felt like he couldn’t think. He was overwhelmed to hell and couldn’t stop fidgeting.
Several hours into the trip, his stomach started grumbling. Piper dug through the bag at her feet and offered him one of her PB&J sandwiches, but Leo couldn’t eat. He hadn’t skipped a meal in forever—he’d been homeless and unsure when he’d even get access to the next meal enough times that it had been all but tattooed into his skull that he couldn’t afford to—but he couldn’t even think about eating without feeling sick. He thought about Jason. He thought about the state he’d left Camp Jupiter in and the fact that they hadn’t even been able to give the dead their proper funeral rites.
Had Leo’s help made any difference at all? Had anything he’d done in his life changed things even slightly?
Leo knew the Fates had intended for it to be fire that fell—for him to burn in a bright, hot blaze and turn himself to charcoal. But he’d refused to stay dead like a good little pawn, and now Jason was gone, and it was all his fault.
He wasn’t sure how Piper could even look at him right now, but he was beyond grateful that she was holding onto him as tightly as she did. It was the only reason he didn’t fall to pieces completely. The cog at the heart of Leo’s machine had broken in a way that made it utterly beyond repair, and now it felt like a matter of time before the whole thing came apart. Piper holding him was the only reason his remaining pieces were still functioning.
It should have been impossible for Leo to fall asleep under these circumstances, but he’d been traveling for hours and fighting before then and he’d cried out his remaining energy, so eventually, the world started to fade around him, reduced to just the sound of Piper’s breaths, until finally, those went, too.
~~~~
It would have been kinder, maybe, if Leo had dreamed up some shitty visions promising violent death and/or the end of the world. That would have been business as usual.
Instead, he dreamed of his time on the Argo II—of one of those early nights when the different groups were still getting to know each other, having a brief moment to breathe between their ridiculous tasks and saving the world.
It had seemed reasonable to catch each other up on what had happened on their end. Percy, Hazel and Frank had talked about rescuing Thanatos, and Piper, Jason and Leo had told them what had happened with Hera in turn.
This would have been a boring intel conversation at best, seeing as Leo had been there for all of their part, but they’d grabbed snacks and sat on cushions on the floor and made it a whole bonding activity. Jason had been wedged between Piper and Leo, and they’d taken turns storytelling.
And Jason had bragged. So much. But he hadn’t even had the decency to brag about himself like a normal human being. Instead, he’d talked about how capable Piper and Leo had been, somehow managing to make Leo sound like the coolest person he’d ever met. Which was ridiculous, considering he’d met everyone else on their team.
And sure, Leo made it sound like he thought he was amazing all the time, but he was exaggerating, which everyone, himself included, knew.
Jason didn’t seem to have gotten the memo, though. He had one arm wrapped around Leo the whole evening, and he got all starry-eyed when he talked.
“Leo took on three Cyclopes by himself. Three!”
“Dude, stop!” Leo had laughed, shaking his head. “I know I’m incredible and you’re blessed to be friends with me and stuff, but you weren’t even conscious for that part.”
“Still happened, though.” Jason had beamed at him. “You’re amazing, dude. I would have died about fifteen times on that mission if it hadn’t been for you. You guys should’ve seen him.”
It would have been easier if Leo had thought Jason was just trying to talk him up to the others to make them more willing to trust him after how badly he’d messed up in New Rome, but Jason wasn’t the type. He’d looked like he honestly believed every single word he was saying.
So, of course, Leo had refused to seriously deal with any of the things that made him feel.
“Sorry, Pipes, but I’m pretty sure your boyfriend is in love with me. It’s the fire powers, I’m afraid. I’m just too hot to resist,” Leo had joked instead, and Piper had untangled herself from Jason’s other side to throw Doritos at Leo, and everything had been right in the universe.
~~~~
Waking up from that, blearily blinking himself awake in the car full of moving boxes and remembering… that was a worse punch in the gut than waking up from most nightmares had been. And Leo should know. He’d had so many of those over the years that he was basically a certified nightmare expert at this point.
Leo wanted to go back in time and spend forever in that one evening, living it over and over and over again until the Fates or a temporal paradox or something eventually killed him. He wanted to hold on to what they’d been back then—the three of them together and happy and whole,back before they’d realized what the prophecy really meant.
He wanted to stay wrapped in Jason’s arm and hear him laugh at whatever stupid joke Leo came up with while he and Piper threw snacks at each other like ten year olds. He wanted to believe he could actually be the person Jason was bragging about—this invincible hero that could do just about anything and saved people’s lives.
But Leo had never been that hero. Even his sacrifice had been the selfish decision of a coward who wasn’t ready to die just yet. Jason had been their Superman. The guy who could fly and threw lightning and saved people from falling to their deaths. Jason had been the hero. And ultimately, that had been what killed him.
Leo wasn’t exactly sure what he planned to do once they got to Oklahoma. He should have been heading back to the Waystation, to give Calypso the normal life he’d promised. But he wasn’t thinking about Calypso, or the Waystation, and the thought of a normal life had gone out of the window the second he’d seen the coffin. Besides, the Waystation would mean people asking questions, wanting to know about his mission and asking him to talk about his feelings, and he didn’t want that.
The only thing Leo really wanted to do right now was not think.
By the time they got to the house, it was so late that cross-country dragon flight seemed inadvisable for visibility reasons alone, so Leo agreed to stay the night. Festus nuzzled him for a bit, got a fuel snack from the canister Leo had brought and then folded down into his million pound suitcase form for the night.
It took a little under two hours to carry all the boxes inside, which was an annoying amount of time to be carrying boxes but seemed like an absurdly short amount to move the contents of an entire life.
They spent some time in search of the necessities that needed to be unpacked, but the house was still furnished and also had running water and electricity as of a few days ago, so it wasn’t that bad.
While Piper went in search of some ancient camping gear so Leo wouldn’t have to sleep on the floor—this seemed silly to him, the floor was far from the worst place he’d ever slept—Leo asked Piper’s dad if he could help with dinner.
Tristan looked relieved at his offer, actually. He’d been staring at the assorted vegetables with a slightly lost expression, trying to hack at one of the zucchinis with a butter knife. It seemed like he was trying to remember how cooking worked and had just discovered he had absolutely no idea.
Considering how long he’d been an insanely rich guy with a personal cook, Leo guessed that actually might have been a pretty accurate read on the situation.
“You might want to try a sharper knife,” Leo suggested, which made Piper’s dad look absolutely mortified. “Try not to chop off any of your fingers, though. I think Piper’s been traumatized enough for one week.”
The words were out of his mouth before Leo could think to stop them. Tristan didn’t laugh, but at least it didn’t seem like he’d be tossing Leo out of the house over this. Maybe he realized people sometimes said stupid shit when they were grieving. Maybe Piper had just warned him in advance that Leo was like this sometimes.
Tristan just went to find a different knife, which would have maybe been concerning if he hadn’t gone back to hacking at the vegetables a moment later.
“Well, at least this one is actually cutting through the zucchinis. That’s already an improvement.”
“Yeah, I’m basically a cooking expert,” Leo said with a grin, only half-joking. He went to peel and chop up the carrots, and was done with those and about half the mushrooms by the time the poor zucchini had been hacked to bits.
“You and Piper went to school together, right?” Tristan asked after a while of them quietly chopping vegetables for the casserole, trying to make sense of things with information he didn’t have and that, judging from past evidence, probably would have made his skull crack. “You and her and Jason.”
“Yeah. We went to Wilderness school together.” Leo winced, trying not to think too hard of Jason while also trying to remember the lies they’d already told Piper’s dad. At this rate, he was pretty worried his own skull would crack, too. “Then all three of us switched to a different school. Then I was gone for a while.”
Tristan nodded like this made perfect sense, though he mostly seemed lost in thought. That was a little rude, in Leo’s opinion. If he went through all that effort to remember their elaborate setup of lies, the least Piper’s dad could do was appreciate it!
“I’m glad you’re here now, with everything that’s happened. Piper was really upset when you left,” Tristan said, still with that faraway look in his eyes. “The last few months were hard for her. Between the move and the breakup, she really could have used a friend.”
Leo promptly lost all rights to make fun of Piper’s dad and his vegetable chopping skills because at the word ‘breakup’, the knife slipped and he nearly sliced off two of his fingers.
“Fuck! Ow!” he said eloquently, trying to avoid bleeding all over the cutting board in his attempt to get to the sink. “Jason and Piper broke up?”
The question sounded absurd even to his own ears. Why would Jason and Piper break up? They’d been happy together.
Surely, Piper’s dad had to be talking about something else.
To Leo’s shock, Tristan nodded.
“A while ago, yes,” he said, but he didn’t go into details—possibly because Leo was bleeding all over the sink. “We should bandage that. Do you think you need stitches?”
“No, the cuts aren’t that deep,” Leo decided, turning on the faucet and holding his bleeding hand under the stream of cold water. Maybe he should have been more concerned about the injury, but his mind was still whirring at the thought of his best friends breaking up. Unfortunately, the cold water stung like hell. He hissed with pain. “Sorry for making your kitchen look like a crime scene right after moving in. Usually, I at least have the decency to wait a day or two.”
Because the house was a small, cozy place and Leo had not had the decency to curse quietly, Piper appeared in the doorway a moment later, an alarmed expression on her face.
“What happened?”
“I’ve been bested by a stupid potato,” Leo cursed, holding up his bleeding hand and wiggling his fingers for emphasis. He figured out immediately that this was a mistake. “Ow.”
“Stop that, dumbass!” Piper cursed, moving to stand beside him. “Sink was the right call, but you need to use soap or the cuts could get infected. Dad, any chance we have gauze lying around somewhere?”
Tristan didn’t seem to question why his daughter had immediately jumped into emergency medical treatment mode. He just abandoned the cutting board and headed for the front door.
“Not exactly sure what box our regular medical supplies are in, but I’ll get the first aid kit from the car. I’ll be right back.”
“Do we have to do the soap?” Leo whined, because fuck, that stung, but Piper nodded with a scary expression on her face, so he complied. “How do you even know this stuff? Are we sure you’re not secretly an Apollo kid?”
“I know this stuff because I’m friends with a bunch of morons who have zero sense of self-preservation,” Piper cursed, gritting her teeth. “You shouldn’t be around knives when you’re this distracted.”
“I can usually cook just fine when I’m distracted. Your dad was the one who told me you and Jason broke up in the middle of this stupid potato,” Leo said defensively. “Is that the Mist messing with him?”
That was the only explanation his mind had supplied so far that made any sense to him.
Piper shook her head. “We really did break up. That was a few months ago.”
Leo felt his jaw hit the floor.
“What the hell happened? You were together for ages. I thought- you always seemed so happy.”
“I know, but-” Piper broke off abruptly when her dad came back inside with the first aid kit. Demigod stuff, then?
Leo’s mind was racing. The breakup was a completely stupid thing to focus on, considering everything that had happened in the last few days. He knew that.
But it was easier to try and make sense of this than it was to try and make sense of the fact that Jason was gone and he’d never get to see him again.
“Is it alright if we do this somewhere else?” Piper asked her dad, taking the first aid kit from him.
“Of course. It might be easier to patch him up when you’re both sitting down, anyway.” He turned towards Leo. “Thank you for your help, but I think I can take it from here.”
Leo sent a silent prayer to whichever deity was responsible for protecting vegetables—Demeter, probably?—and gave what he hoped was an encouraging thumbs up with his uninjured hand before he followed Piper into the hallway to presumably be reprimanded some more.
~~~~ They ended up sitting on an old bed that looked like it had lived a long, miserable life and was excited for retirement, but the wooden frame thankfully didn’t break down under the weight of the new mattress or the additional weight of them sitting on said mattress. Piper explained that this had been her dad’s room when he’d lived here as a child, and that it would probably become her room now. Then she went very quiet and focused on bandaging his hand, clearly avoiding looking at him.
“It wasn’t because of me, was it?” Leo asked. The thought made him feel ill. “Please tell me it wasn’t something like, I don’t know, you two being unable to stand being around each other after what happened to me. I think I’d actually have to blow myself up again if it was.”
He tried to make it sound like a joke, but it didn’t feel like one at all. The thought that he'd managed to ruin his best friends’ relationship on top of everything else made it hard to breathe.
When Piper shook her head, it felt like a whole boulder was lifted off his shoulders.
“I actually think we would have broken up sooner if you hadn’t gone missing. We leaned on each other a lot after you disappeared. It wasn’t until we realized we wouldn’t find you and things started to settle down a little that I had time to think. And when I did…” Her voice went very quiet, and she still didn’t look up at him. “I realized I wasn’t happy in the relationship. I don’t think I ever was.”
“How did I not know that?” Leo wondered quietly. “I just… you two seemed happy to me. What kind of garbage best friend am I?”
Piper shook her head. “It isn’t your fault. I was telling myself I was happy for a long time. It’s almost- sometimes I wonder if I was charmspeaking myself. That maybe I kept saying I was in love with Jason until I convinced myself I actually was. And with Hera and my mom setting it up… I love-” her voice caught in her throat, and Leo felt like maybe he needed to throw up, “-loved Jason, but not like that.”
“Pipes, I’m really sorry.” Leo squeezed her shoulder. “That sounds like it was super hard for both of you.” Leo felt awful about the fact that he hadn’t even been around to comfort either of them, but it wasn’t like he could fix it now. It was just another item on Leo’s unending list of epic screwups he’d never be able to make up for.
“Jason was… well, he took it exactly like I expected him to. He was surprised, but he didn’t get angry or anything. He mostly seemed okay. Part of me wonders if maybe…” But whatever Piper had been thinking about, she seemed to decide it wasn’t important. “It was hard to get a proper read on him, and as nice as he was about it, things were still super awkward after. I'm terrified he died thinking I didn’t care about him.”
And then she was tearing up again, and Leo thought he would shatter if she cried.
“He knew you cared,” he said as earnestly as he could manage, pulling Piper to his chest again. “You love way too annoyingly for him not to have known. Hell, even I know you love me, and we both know I’m a fucking nightmare when it comes to this stuff.”
“I missed you so much,” she whispered, wrapping her arms around his back like it was the easiest thing in the world.
“Oh, I’m about to make you regret saying that,” Leo said, forcing himself to smile. “I’ll bring it up each and every time you say you find something I do annoying.”
“You’re annoying as hell, but you’re still my best friend.” He could feel her tears dripping onto his shoulder, and he knew that would make him start up again too. “I don’t know how I’d do this without you.”
And well, passing away from dehydration after crying too much would be a really lame way to die the second time, but everything was just too much right now, so if that was how he went, Leo wasn’t sure anyone could blame him.
~~~~
For the next couple of weeks, Leo stayed.
Helping Piper and her dad unpack was the perfect way to keep himself occupied and not have to think. Usually, a mundane task like this probably would have driven Leo nuts. But right now, it was a bit of a godsend—if not literally, at least figuratively. Being productive was always so much easier when it was done in order to avoid something you wanted to do even less. There was a reason his spaces in the foster homes had only ever been tidy when he had exams coming up.
He helped cook, too, and Piper’s dad became increasingly less garbage at it the longer this went on—like muscle memory was finally kicking in after years of disuse.
It was mostly good—listening to Piper reminisce about trips she’d taken with her dad and where she’d gotten the weird variety of items she kept in her room. When they weren’t unpacking, Leo and Piper played video games or watched movies or explored the area. Twice, during the night, they took Festus on a little flight to a nearby fast food place. Finding a parking spot was a bit of a nightmare, unfortunately. Leo would submit a complaint about their inability to accommodate celestial bronze dragons the first chance he got.
The first time they tried hiking—Leo didn’t even like hiking, he’d spent enough time outside for several lifetimes, why did he do this to himself—they got hopelessly lost in the woods, and of course, due to demigod bullshit, neither of them had brought a phone, so Google Maps wasn’t an option. It was probably for the better. The last thing that situation needed on top of them being lost was a monster attack.
They were already jokingly planning out their new life in the woods when, thankfully, a girl their age came to their rescue.
“A human being! Thank the gods. The squirrels weren’t talking to us,” Leo greeted her, which had Piper shout “Please ignore Leo!” loudly from the branches of the tree she’d been climbing.
The girl lifted her head, spotted Piper and promptly burst out laughing.
“What in the world are you doing up there?”
“Trying to get a better vantage point,” Piper sighed, making her way back down the tree. “We’re hopelessly lost.”
“Well, nice to meet you, hopelessly lost. I’m Shel,” the girl said, still grinning. Leo decided immediately that he liked her.
Piper had almost made it back down when she somehow missed a branch and fell the rest of the way. In comedic movie fashion, Shel moved before Leo had the chance to and caught her mid-tumble. “That was a bit of a dramatic way to get my attention, but you’re cute, so I’ll allow it.”
“Oh yeah, Piper’s got a bit of a thing with falling for people that way,” Leo commented, and Piper gave him her most murderous look while she got back on her feet.
“You guys need help getting back?”
“Please, yes,” Piper said immediately. “It turns out we’re both garbage with maps.”
“Maybe you just need a tour guide next time,” Shel suggested, winking at Piper, whose face turned scarlet. Leo wasn’t even mad about being the third wheel for once. He’d give her so much shit about this later.
And he did. And then Piper properly came out to him—no label or anything, mostly as extremely confused but sure she liked girls, which also made a few additional pieces click into place regarding her breakup with Jason. She ended her anxiety-riddled explanation by thanking Leo for being so normal and annoying about all this.
Which was how Leo realized he’d apparently never told Piper he was bi.
Or maybe he had, and it had gotten lost along with their other memories of Wilderness. Stupid memory-stealing babysitters.
Well, at least they got to hug about it now.
~~~~
It was strange how normal some days felt when nothing would ever truly be normal again. When in every moment Leo and Piper spent together, the gaping hole that had been ripped into their trio was so blatantly obvious.
The benefit and problem of this friendship was that Leo and Piper were both experts at not talking about things they were struggling with.
This wasn’t exactly news. From what little Leo did remember of Wilderness School, they’d spent months not talking about his mom, or about the fact that Piper’s dad kept canceling their weekend plans. They’d both known there were things left unsaid, but as long as they’d been able to cheer each other up, that hadn’t really mattered. It made sense, honestly. Put two people who hadn’t had a shoulder to cry on for ages in a room together and see what happens!
Right now, this meant they were expertly ignoring the box of belongings Piper had picked up from Jason’s school. It had been pushed so far under the bed during that first night that it was no longer visible, and neither of them made any effort to move it out of its new home since. They ignored the topic of Jason, period, until it inevitably hit them in the face again.
It was mostly dumb shit that set them off. Piper automatically reaching for vanilla ice cream at the grocery store because it was Jason’s favorite—seriously, who in their right mind even liked vanilla ice cream?
Sometimes, Leo would make a joke and burst into tears instead of laughing because he knew it would have cracked Jason up. They found old photos unpacking. One time, Piper’s dad suggested they make tacos and they started simultaneously bawling their eyes out.
Leo had spent a long time exactly like this—pretending everything was normal and okay when it wasn’t either of those things until he inevitably broke down. Then he’d started to actually feel sort of okay whenever he was with Jason and Piper. Now, he was sure he would spend the rest of his life pretending.
His appetite was too used to being stuck in survival mode for him to bow to nausea for long, so he went back to eating properly after a few days. He still cried himself to sleep most nights. He kept dreaming about Jason. The memories wrapped themselves around him like a safety blanket that he knew would get ripped away again in the morning. He always woke up feeling empty. Sometimes, he wished he could just go to sleep and never wake up again.
But other than that, it was mostly good.
Then demigod communications went back up, and everything went to hell.
———
Chapter notes:
Fun fact! I originally planned for this chapter (as well as the next few chapters) to just be backstory in my head and for me to maybe do a flashback or two. Unfortunately for me, Piper McLean waltzed into the room and refused to leave.
I do actually think the fic works better this way, but it will take a second to get to the plot! Hopefully you’ll enjoy the whole journey :)
I may not be able to have Leo and Piper go to Jason’s funeral without seriously messing with the plot of Tyrant’s Tomb, but I could at least pick the most evil reason possible for them not to go!
Side note: I sort of forgot that Hedge and Mellie were supposed to be here according to TBM, but by the time I remembered I already had this chapter written out and, as someone who cannot be bothered to figure out how to write them, I decided to just leave it. ToA is vaguely canon to this universe, but only for the most part. Some details are inaccurate, and I think that’s okay.
Anyway, thank you so much for reading! Comments and reblogs super, super appreciated as always!!
List of people that at some point asked to be tagged when I post this: @poppitron360 @ginnyluna @keefessketchbook (feel free to comment if you want to get taken off or be put on the tag list for future chapters!)
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Something that's been on my mind is seeing the idea that in order for smut to be valid to write it has to have a purpose. It has to say something about the characters, it has to serve as a tool for the plot, it has to have some deep meaning beyond the sex acts involved.
And honestly, that's not true no matter how much some very vocal people might insist that smut without a 'purpose' is just porn and porn is shameful to make and consume.
It's okay to write smut because you think the concept is hot. It's okay to write it just because you want to give your readers jerk off material about their favorite characters. It's absolutely, 100% fine to write smut for smut's sake.
And sure, you want it to be in character, you want to write it so that you can't just file the names off and replace them with anyone. But you can just write something because you think character X should fuck character Y in this very specific way and have that be the end of it.
Call it smut, call it porn, call it whatever. Write the stuff you want to write. You don't have to do literary gymnastics in order to make it 'valid' for anyone, and you especially don't have to make excuses to yourself to justify writing it in the first place.
#*grandpa simpson voice* back in my day we called it pwp and we tagged it that way and the people LOVED it#i fucking love writing smut and like yeah sometimes plot happens in the build up#but make no mistake about it#nine times out of ten i wrote the fic because i wanted to write the filth#the plot was incidental#and mostly for dirty purposes anyways to create anticipation#there's a reason i have daniel wracked with nerves in the build up to every thing i do#so that it's a release when he does give in and commit the act#but all that build up is 100% psychosexual in nature#anyways i feel sad seeing some people try to always insist their smut has a point so it's okay to write it or draw it or whatever#make the filth celebrate making the filth just go for it!!#anne rice did for four entire books!!!#and she wasn't ashamed and didn't need them to have literary value#on fanfiction#writing stuff
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i think some of you are too used to genre conventions, you guys forgot to question the worldbuilding that many authors painstakingly made to question the subject of death and life in a more nuanced manner than just "wow resurrection is so romantic!"
#like yeah i do love romanticizing horror tropes at times#but there's a reason why it is a horror trope and not a common romance plot#necromancy... especially mixing an individual's soul with that of another species is something that can be disturbing#doesn't matter if the one who's doing the resurrecting or the one get resurrected is in love#think about how falin feels knowing that even though marcille and laios loved her they ended up taking a decision#that not only hurts her physically but also emotionally#being stripped of control from your own body... not being able to do anything but follow your master's command...#falin did not asked to be the chimera#but that's what makes her decision to take the red dragon with her before she wakes up so cathartic in some ways#she also acknowledged that the red dragon did not ask for this to happen... just like how she forgives the lil guy she also#forgives her brother and marcille for taking this very... bad decision because she understands they're just as desperate#as she is when she tried to save them before she died#it circles back to the theme of accepting death and how resurrection magic ended up making people too comfortable#with the act of mindless killing of other living creatures#but yeah sadly people only see the surface level stuff but don't actively tried to understand the significance behind the plot#i can't really blame anime-only but people who read the manga tho...#if you only understand it as a romance trope and be like 'oh everyone else is just stupid' maybe you need to reread the manga#at least once a month#to understand ryoko kui's writing better#tmi tag
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2022 reads // twitter thread
If You Could See The Sun
When she discovers she can go invisible, a girl at an international boarding school in China uses an anonymous app to help her classmates find secrets and information so she can pay the school fees her scholarship doesn’t cover
academic stress, academic rivals romance
#If You Could See The Sun#aroaessidhe 2022 reads#read in december; held for strike#tbh I from the title and cover I was expecting like. something that’s deep and complex into mental health and magical realism but actually t#this is pretty lighthearted …….#or I guess like. average ya contemporary tone#which is not really a criticism of the book i guess I just wasn’t That invested based on my expectations!#I feel like some stuff just happened the way it did because of Plot and it didn’t really need to..#would recommend if you think you like this sort of thing tho!#definitely interesting to have YA set at boarding schools in non western countries
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YOUR BIGGEST FAN — GETO SUGURU
✧・. on vacation with your family, you discover that your biggest fan may not be a mystery after fall.
( TW ) f!reader. camgirl!reader. stepbrother!Geto (in a plot device way, no nii-chan and stuff.) unprotected sex. cream pie. phone sex. squirting. fingering. mutual masturbation. cunnilingus. deception. mentions of bullying. misunderstandings. hurt/comfort. explicit content.
word count - > 6.6k
authors note. can you see I wasn’t creative with the username? I have a love-hate relationship with this fic because I feel like it goes from 0 to 100 real quick lmfao. This is heavily inspired by the book Eyes on Me!
“I bet you look handsome.” You smile at the black screen with the default profile picture floating in the middle.
‘Nah.’ User @Sssman72 types into the chat the takes up the left half of your computer.
“Stop! Don’t say think bad things about yourself,” You laugh, making sure your tits jiggle in the flimsy red lingerie you're wearing. “I know your handsome baby.” You reassure your favorite client. The man who alone gives you 50% of your income. He’s the one who bought you this pretty lingerie set you're wearing.
‘You look tired babydoll...how was today?’ He types.
“I’m fine, I promise, just had a long day, was on a few other private chats with some other customers the entire day.” You confess. In all honesty after this call you were planning to pass out and try to get a few hours of sleep before you had to fly out to your family's vacation home. Today on your live stream, you told your followers you were going on vacation for the next two weeks and wouldn't be online. You didn't plan to get on a call with @Sssman72 but he had texted you as you were getting ready to go to bed that he had a bad day and wanted to see you. Before you had a chance to protest, he spent you 500 and said it would only be 30 minutes. You gave in because first he was your biggest supporter and you wanted to be there for him in some way with all the money and gifts, he sends you and second, you didn’t mind chatting with him, you thought he was the sweetest and you struck lucky the day he joined one of your lives.
‘I’ll let you go then, I want you to get some rest before your flight, sorry for keeping you up beautiful just needed to vent about my ass job.’
“I’m always here for you handsome, I'll make sure to send you those pictures you requested through the week.”
‘Make sure you enjoy your break babydoll, don’t gotta worry about me. Goodnight.’
You say your goodbyes and end up falling asleep in the lingerie bought you as soon as you shut your laptop.
—
“How’s college y/n?” Your stepfather asks when you slide into the back seat of the car. Your mother fitting the last of your luggage into the trunk.
“it’s fine, some of my classes are difficult but nothing I can't manage.” You answer as you buckle in.
“Oh yeah? Thats good. You mom tells me you started a job a few months ago, how's that working out for you?”
You tense under the small blanket you’ve thrown over yourself.
“u-uhm yeah its good—yeah it’s been fun.”
“I’m sorry sweetheart, I don't remember what you mother told me you did again.” He chuckles.
“Uhm—I'm a bartender, m-my friend works there and got me a position.” You tell him the lie you've rehearsed hundreds of times. You start to sweat under the blanket. Did he buy it? What if he and your mom found out what you did? Are they planning to ambush you when you get to the house? They're going to make you drop out and chain you up in the basement when they find out. You throw the blanket off, suddenly too hot and alert. Guess that nap you were planning on taking during the drive wasn’t happening.
“Oh, that’s fun sweetheart, I remember I bartended awhile when I was in college, got fired for stealing the alcohol though,” He laughs at the memory before turning to look at you. “You wouldn’t do that though, you’re a good girl.”
You nod, thankful that your mom decided now to take your stepdad's attention away and get in the car.
“Alrighty were good to!” She cheers. Your stepdad turns back around in his seat before starting the car.
“Finally, thought we were going to get a fine parked here another minute.”
“Oh, shut up! Y/n are you excited to go back to the vacation house? You haven’t been in years!” You mom asks as you guys pull out of the airport.
“Yeah, I can’t wait to, I missed the hiking trails and the waterfalls. None of that in the big city.” You answer truthfully. You did miss the silence of the secluded house you vacationed at every summer since your mom married your stepdad. It was the company that you hated. As if your mom heard your thought, she says something that makes your heart drop.
“Suguru feels the same way, we didn't even have to blackmail him to come! That boy...”
“Suguru is coming?” You scream.
“Coming? Sweetie, he’s already arrived this morning. I’m so excited were all together as a family again.”
“Are you fucking serious mom? Turn the car around and bring me back to the airport!” You screech. You were not going to spend the next week with your bully of a stepbrother.
“Y/n!” You mom gasps.
“Sweetheart, he’s changed.” Your stepdad tells you as if that's going to make it better.
“That’s what he wants you to think! He’s the worst human being on planet earth, please don’t make me spend the next few weeks with him, please mom,” you lean over the consul. “Please dad.” You pout at your stepfather. You know he gets weak whenever you call him dad.
“Sweetheart...”
“No! You aren’t sweet talking your way out of this, he’s changed. He isn't the same teenager with a chip on his shoulder, he’s matured. He even told me the reason he’s coming is to apologize and bond with you y/n.”
“He’s lying mom! He doesn't care about me; I wouldn't be surprised if he told you that just so he could drown me in the lake. You guys own the land so nobody would find my body!” You start to tear up. You were going to jump out of the car if your parents didn't turn back around. Your stepbrother was your biggest tormentor since the day you met him. From picking on you at home to getting the girls to bully you at school. He made your life hell for four years. The day you left for college you screamed how much you hated him and told your parents that the four of you would only be in the same room again when you lay in a casket.
“Oh, don’t cry sweetheart. Your mother is right, he’s changed, I wouldn’t have allowed him around you if he hadn’t. Give us a week and if you want to leave, I promise I'll drive you back to the airport and you’ll never have to see him again, please?”
“No.” You cross your arms and look out the window despite knowing that they’ve won. You can’t jump out of the car now that you are on the highway, and you didn’t bring your own car to drive yourself back to the airport.
“We’ll give you the master suite, the whole attic floor to yourself.” They bargain. You act like you’re thinking of accepting the offer. With the master suite taking up the entire third floor you could lock yourself up there and ignore Suguru. You could also film videos and even go live because the room is soundproof. You perk up at that. You could just spend your vacation on stream and chatting with @Sssman72. He’s somehow always free for you and told you that if you get bored you could call him. He’ll make up for your stepbrother’s awful behavior.
“Fine, I’ll take the master suite.”
—
“Okay that's the last of your luggage, we’ll be having dinner in a few hours on the dock.”
“Kay, thanks.” You watch your stepdad shut the door. Once he does you release the tension in your shoulders. You lock the door before running to throw yourself onto the huge king bed. You sink down. You didn’t see Suguru when you arrived, you mom told you he was probably in town. You hope he stayed in town for the next two weeks.
After laying it bed thinking about how much you hate Suguru with a passion you pull out your phone and open the porn app. You click on messages and open your chat with @Sssman72.
‘Hey...I know I told you I was on vacation but I already wanna go home. You don't have to answer lol.’ You send. He immediately starts typing.
‘Of course, I'll answer you babydoll. What’s wrong?’ Your face heats at the pet names. You wish you knew what he looked like, all he told you about himself was that he was in his twenties and worked for his father's company. You want to know more, what he looks like, what he sounds like. If the messages he sends make you sweat, you wonder what’ll happen if he spoke to them to you. In your head he’s a handsome bachelor who just so happened to find you and deem you worthy of his time and money but hell, he could be lying. He could be some old rich man in his eighties who likes young girls like all the rest of your viewers. The romantic part of you ignores that and is convinced he is who he says he is and that one day you’re going to meet in person and fall in and have a bunch of his babies.
‘You know that stepbrother I told you about?’
“Mm, that asshole who bullied you?’
‘Yep, that asshole. Anyways I bet you won't guess who's here on vacation with me?’
‘Are you serious?’
‘Dead serious...my parents didn’t tell me until I was already trapped and now, I have to spend my vacation away with a man who hates me for no reason.’
‘Wow that’s crazy lol. Did your parents tell you why he chose to vacation with you if he doesn’t like you?’
‘Apparently he’s here to make amends...he’s probably here to kill me so he gets all the inheritance.’
‘Well, what if he’s really there to make amends baby?’
‘You should've heard the groan I just let out. I can’t believe you’re on his side babe. When I tell you that he too evil for that I mean it.’
‘Hey, you know I'm always on your side babydoll, I'm just giving you a man’s perspective on it. Maybe he realized he’s fucked up and he feels back so he wants to apologize for all the wrong he caused you’
‘Yea well from a women's perspective he’s an asshole who doesn’t care about anyone else but himself!’
‘Don’t say the baby...hypothetically what would he have to do to get you to forgive him?’
‘Hypothetically he's going to have to get on his knees and beg for my forgiveness every time he sees me until I deem, he's forgiven. And he’s also gonna have to send every dollar in his bank account to me AND be my slave for the rest of his life...hypothetically.’
‘Lol you never know babydoll, he just might be willing to do anything for your forgiveness. I know I would.’
‘That’s because you’re perfect and care about my feelings...now I'm gonna go get some sleep before having to eat with the devil. Pray he doesn’t poison me and I survive the night.’
—
You sit at the dinning room table waiting for Suguru. Of course, he’s late, he doesn’t care about anyone's time but his. You say so to your parents.
“Y/n stop being so harsh and give him a chance please.” You roll your eyes and go back to scrolling on social media.
“Sorry I'm late.” You jump at the deep voice before whipping your head to the left where your stepbrother stands looking so...so different.
“Suguru! No need to apologize! Come sit.” Your mother points to the empty seat opposite you. Suguru glances at you and smiles before walking to the seat. You gasp. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him smile at you or anyone else. Actually, you know he hasn’t smiled at anyone, he was know for being so stoic. You watch intensely as he pulls out the chair and sits. He looks like a different man, his hair is long, down past his shoulders, the black shirt he's wearing stretches around a huge chest. He looks like he spends half his day in the gym. And those eyes—those eyes that always had heavy eyebags and glared at everyone that looked his way, look at you with gentle look you can’t place. They even crease with the smile that he’s wearing. Your eyes widen, he has a fucking dimple. He looks like a gentleman, he looks handsome. You can't stop staring at his smile.
“Y/n? You alright?” You Stepdad breaks through the haze you were in. You look at your parents and back to Suguru who all have concerned expressions on their faces. You feel your entire body heat in embarrassment.
‘Uhm—yea I'm fine.” You look at your parents, refusing to look back at that smile. Suguru has different plans.
“Hey y/n, it’s been a long time yeah?” Suguru says in that deep voice that has your heart beating faster. Out the corner of your eye you watch as Suguru reaches over the food, holding his hand out. Does he really think you’re about to give him a damn handshake?
...Are you seriously thinking about shaking that huge hand? No, you won’t.
You purse your lips and cross your arms over your chest. You swear you see him glance down at your cleavage but the next second, he's holding eye contact. You blink and look away with a ‘hmm’. He lowers his hand.
“Alright guys let's eat, okay?” You mom breaks the tension. Everyone grabs their share, and you eat in silence for a while, nobody brave enough to speak and you simmering with anger at Suguru. You throw glare at him every time you look up from your plate which happens more times than you’d admit.
“You got something there.” Suguru points the sharp end of the fork at you.
“What?” You ask.
“There,” He grabs his napkin and starts to reach for you. You tense suddenly locked in place. Suguru brings the napkin to the corner of your mouth and wipes it. “There you go.”
You stare at him like he's grown three heads. Maybe he’s dying and wants to make amends? Why else would he be treating you like this. Maybe someone took over his body? That has to be it.
“Uh thanks?” You mummer, unsure what to say.
“You're welcome little sis.” You choke on your spit. What the hell did he just call you!? He must be messing with you; you’re suddenly filled with rage. You glare at him, hoping he disintegrates with the sheer force of your stare.
“You’ve grown up.” Suguru says after another blinking contest, you lost.
“Yea, have you?” You snarl. He stops smiling.
“I have,” he says seriously, setting his fork down. “I want to talk about—”
“I don’t care.”
“Please—”
“No!” You slam your hand on the table, and he goes silent. You’re overcome with guilt before you remember that he bullied you for a year, that he told the entire school to bully you after he graduated. Fuck him.
—
You slam the door the door of your room speed walking to the bathroom. You strip your clothes before turning on the tub. You finally breathe when you settle into the scolding hot water. You needed to wash his gaze, his touch, off your body. The entire dinner after your conversation was awkward, your parents didn't really speak, and you refused to glance back up at Suguru who wouldn't stop staring.
You hated him. You hated him. You—you can’t bring yourself to hate him. For some unknown reason you can’t bring yourself to hate him despite everything he's put you through. Why? You shake your head. You don’t want to think of Suguru while you're trying to relax. You phone dings. You pick up and a smile replaces your frown. @Sssman72.
‘How are you babydoll, you alive?’
‘Yes, wish I wasn’t though.’
‘Why what happened during dinner?’ You sigh and send him voice message detailing everything that happened.
‘Oh wow.’
‘I know.’
‘You gonna give him a chance to explain?’
‘I don’t know I don’t want to but also, I want to hear his explanation...can we call I really don't want to type all of this out?’
‘Course, give me a second. I'll call you.’ You wait a few minutes before you hear the familiar ring.
“Hi handsome.” you smile at the blank profile. Right now, you’d do anything to see him, to hear him comfort you, to be in his arms. He could be the ugliest man in the world, you wouldn’t care.
‘HI beautiful. Talk to me.’ He types into the chat box.
“I don't know. like I said I want to hear him out but also, I don't want to hear it because what it it’s bad, what if it doesn’t excuse it? But also, what if it does and I feel like shit for being mean back—it's just so stressful.”
‘I know babydoll. I wish I could be there right now and hold you. I would do anything to take that hurt away. I'm sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.’
“Stop, don’t apologize you didn’t do anything. If anything, I should apologize for using you as a therapist when you paid to see me naked.” You laugh.
‘Beautiful girl—I would rather pay to hear all your problems and be able to comfort you than see you naked again.’
“Wow you don’t want to see me naked, I'm hurt. Just kidding, thank you for saying that handsome.” You feel your heart skip a beat at his message. Maybe you can convince him to turn his camera on tonight.
“I kinda wanna take my mind off everything right now.” You murmur into the phone before turning on your camera. You hold it above you and smile so he can see everything.
‘So, fucking beautiful, prettiest girl in the world. You gonna give me a show?’
“hm,” You use your free hand to tap your chin. “Only if you do something for me.”
‘And what is that?’
‘Can you turn your camera on? And before you say no, you don’ have to show your face—maybe you can just show your dick or something else. We can masturbate on the phone, please handsome please.” You whine giving him your best puppy face. You watch as the chat bubbles disappear and reappear. You’re about to back out but all the sudden you’re looking at a dim lit room and a huge cock between a big hand. Your eyes widen and the sight.
"Y-you probably won’t be able to type and jack off at the same time” You suck in a breath. Please turn your audio on please...
‘I’m gonna turn my audio on but I won’t talk, okay? Think you can get off on my moans babydoll?’
You nod.
‘Good girl now show me that pretty pussy, make it squirt for me.’
You lift yourself up to sit on the corner of the tub, propping one leg on tub and spreading the other that rests in the water. You flip the camera so your mystery man can watch you finger yourself. You hear him groan and spit onto his hand.
You moan softly at the sound, teasing your entrance. You wish he was talking to through it, but you’ll settle for this for now. One day...
“Mmm, wish you were the one fingering me right now,” You circle your clit before gliding your fingers out your cunt.
“Wish you were here, holding me n' fucking me.” You curl your fingers into your g-spot and moan. You look back at your phone, watching your stranger play with the tip of his long cock. It looks so big compared to his hand, you know you’ll struggle to take it. Your pussy clenches around your small fingers that do close to nothing compared to your dildos at home.
“Wan’ your cock in me so bad, it looks so big you’ll have to force me to take it, you’ll have to hold me down and make me take it.” You cry out. You watch as he squeezes his hand up and down his cock. It looks painful. He grunts louder.
“M’gonna cum for you handsome, m’gonna give you what you want and make a mess,” You speed up your fingers to match how fast he slides his fist up and his cock. You moan louder, thankful that you got the suite and aren’t in the room next to your stepbrothers, how embarrassing it would be if he could hear you pleasuring yourself.
You clench harder around your fingers. Your stranger starts to grunt and groan louder. You shiver at his deep voice on the edge of cumming.
“Please please let me cum please! Can I come for you please?” You cry, your pussy starts to squelch, spurts of liquid coming out.
“Yes, cum for me.” Your mystery man groans in an all too familiar voice but before you have time to think about it, you’re squirting, the grip on your phone loosening and falling into the water.
“N-no!”
—
“Yes, this phone is done for, your mother and I are heading into town we can try to find a company that sells phone, but you know how small towns like this are.” You stepdad stares at your phone that’s been sitting in a container full of rice since last night.
“Fuck, I need it for work! What am I going to do?” You look up at him in distress.
“What do you need your phone for bartending?” He looks down at you incredulously.
“My boss is sending me some important email and I didn't bring my computer.” You lie.
“Well, you can use Suguru’s laptop, I saw him using it this morning in the sitting room. Think he left it there before he went on his run.” Your stepdad points down the hall as your mother rounds the corner.
“Ready to go honey?” She asks your stepdad.
“Coming! Use Suguru laptop to check your email, if we come back and you haven’t got the email you can use my phone. Bye! Have fun and be nice!” Your stepdad waves before following your mother. You wave back.
Of course, you had to use Suguru’s laptop. Maybe you can just log in, tell your stranger that you’re okay and that you won’t be able to contact him until you get a new phone and then delete the history before Suguru comes back from his run. It’ll only take a few minutes...you hope he doesn’t a password.
You run to the sitting room, but you don’t see a laptop anywhere. Dammit, he always has to make things hard for you. You walk up the round staircase and down the hall until you're standing in front of Suguru’s room. You look around, as if Suguru's gonna pop up out of nowhere and attack you from going into his room. You shake the thought off and open his door. You stop and stare at the bed, you feel like you've seen that duvet. You chalk it up to a bunch of man having the same bedding before turning to scan the room for a laptop. You quickly spot the laptop on his desk and run to it. You sigh in relief when it opens to the last tab he had opened. Thank you Suguru for not caring about who gets into your shit. You click new tab and start to type in the name of the website you use before you freeze.
You only need to type in three letters before the website popped up in top hits. You stop breathing. No... He couldn’t know what you do. Is that why he came here? Was he going to expose you to your parents? Was he acting nice to butter you up before crushing you? Your vision starts to blur. All boys watch porn, maybe he just happens to watch porn on the same website you film on. You can block your account from him so that he never finds you. You swallow before clicking the tab. You shakily move they pointer over to the search bar before you spot something in the left corner that makes you dizzy.
Right where the username of the viewer is supposed to be is the username @Sssman72. Your heart stops and you feel wetness hit your hands. This can’t be real. You move to chat and cry out when you see your username. The last text he sent was asking what happened. No—this is a dream; you’re going to wake up and this is going to be a bad nightmare. You refuse to believe the man you’ve been slowly falling in love with over the last six months is your stepbrother, your bully. The man you confessed all your darkest secrets is the man who never showed you an ounce of kindness. Is this a part of his master plan? Is he going to blackmail you and hold all the nudes you’ve sent him and all the secrets you’ve told him over your head. You’re going to become his slave, doing whatever he wants of you until you die. You curl into yourself and cry harder at the thought.
“Y/n? What are you do—” Suguru stops when he sees what's on the screen. “Let me explain please baby.” He reaches out to touch your shoulder. You flinch away from his touch.
“D-don’t call me that,” You sob staring at him with such heartbreak in your eyes he wants to drop and beg for your forgiveness. “You-you, it was you the whole time.” Your voice breaks.
Suguru nods slowly trying to reach out for you again. You take a few steps away. “Was this some masterplan to hold me under your thumb for the rest of my life!?” You scream at him.
He’s grateful your parents went out of town; this would be an absolute shitshow if they were here.
“No babydoll—”
“I said don’t call me that you asshole! Stop pretending. I hate you Suguru! You win okay, you win!” You tell him before you run out of his room. He curses before running after you, you run up that stairs and into the suite but before you can shut the door Suguru shoves it open. You drop to your knees to pull your suitcase from under your bed.
“Please listen to me y/n. I wasn’t faking—stop packing and let me explain.” Suguru pleads as he watches you throw your clothes into your suitcase.
“Y/n, baby, please listen to me please” He grabs your arm, and you try to fight him, but he pulls you down onto the bed with him. He hugs you around the waist and you push in this chest trying to break free. His heart aches. He hates seeing you hurt, he hates that he was the one who made you cry like this. He hates that you only associate him with the version of himself that he created to stop anyone from seeing what he was truly feeling. He hates that you won’t accept the real version of him now that you know it was him. He holds you tighter as you scream and cry. He whispers sweet nothings as you whisper how much you hate him. At some point you stop fighting and wrapping your arms around his neck. You sniffle into his neck, and he rubs your backs and rocks you.
“Why?” You ask hoarsely after all the anger leaves your body. Now you feel numb, like you're watching your life from a third perspective.
“I never hated you, I never lied, and I never planned to blackmail you—I know you don’t believe me baby but everything I've ever told you on that app was real. Everything I feel for you is real.” You pull your face out of his neck and stare up at him. You don’t believe him.
“I have never hated you y/n. I swear it. I hated the fact that my father replaced my mother with yours not even a year after she died. Baby, I never fucking hated you. I was just a teenager who didn’t know how to express my emotions so I took them out of the person I knew I could hurt the most. It was bad I know; I feel like shit to this day. When I graduated and got away from my father, I realized how bad I was to you, and I got into therapy. I wanted to be better for myself, for you, for everyone around me. I didn’t know that the bullying continued when I left. I didn’t know how bad people had taken it until that day I came back home. When you told me off about it, I was so confused. I’m so fucking sorry. I want to reach out and apologize for everything and the day I planned to do it Satoru—my best friend, you remember him—well he sent me the link to your account and so I made an account and it all just spiralized out of control after that. I was too embarrassed to tell you it was me and then we started to form a connection, a real connection, and I didn’t want our conversations to end so—fuck I'm sorry. Everything I told you; I meant it. I fucking meant every word.”
You sit there stunned, trying to comprehend everything he said. You never knew about his mother. You thought she had passed away long before your mom and his dad had met. But you remember when your stranger told you that. God, you remember when your not so mystery man told you about his family the seemed so familiar to yours. And he didn’t tell all those people to bully you after he left? Did he mean every word? Every word of affirmation he gave you. Those times when he told you that you were capable of being loved and that you were going to find someone who would love every part of you, the good and bad. Was that the same Suguru? You try to wrap your mind around the fact that the man you love is your stepbrother.
“I know it’s a lot of information.”
“It is.”
“Do you believe me?” He looks at you with furrowed brows. You do. Despite everything you find yourself nodding. He sighs and you feel the tension release from his shoulders that your arms are wrapped around. You suddenly realize the position you two are in and feel your face heat. Your arms are wrapped around his neck and your legs are on either side of his thick thighs his cock, the cock that you saw last night, is right underneath you, if you lower yourself an inch, you’d be sitting on it.
Suguru grips your waist with one hand, the other cupping the right side of your face. You look up at him and sniffle. He leans down until your foreheads are touching.
“If you give me achance, I'll treat you like the queen you are. I’ll love you the way you’re meant to be loved. One chance is all I ask for.” He mummers rubbing your noses together.
You hesitate, one part of you wants to run away with him because he’s the man you’ve wanted for the last six months. The other part of you wants to run away from him, he’s your stepbrother, he lied, and you don't know if he would’ve ever told you the truth. But isn’t that what he came here to do? Can you blame a little boy for being mad at the people who replaced his mother?
You give him his answer by grabbind his neck and push his lips towards you. If this does go to hell at least you’ll have a story to tell your feature children.
Suguru kisses back before standing and pulling you off him. “What—”
“You said you wanted me on my knees, didn't you? I’m ready to serve you in any way you want. I can have my savings transferred to your account by tomorrow night.” He says as he drops to his knees. You stare at him with wide eyes as he holds your legs and starts kissing from knee to right where your pussy starts.
“Suguru—”
“Shh babydoll let me take care of my girl, show her how sorry I am for hurting her.” He mummers before dropping your leg and picking up the next one. He repeats this a few more times before finally asking you to lift your hips so he can pull your leggings and panties off. Suguru throws your pants behind him before standing up to pull your tank top off. You reach behind to unbuckle your bra and toss it on the floor with your other clothes. Suguru chuckles, reaching up to kiss all over your face.
“Take your clothes off too Sugu.” You giggle, reaching for his sweatpants. You get a firm grip and yank them down. His thick cock bounces out. Your mouth goes slack. The phone call didn’t do it justice. It somehow looks bigger than before and if you weren’t wet before, you are now. That thing is going to be inside you soon.
“Like what you see beautiful?” You nod dumbly as you watch Suguru step out of his pants and take his shirt off with one hand. He’s so fucking sexy.
He drops back down to his knees and pulls you until your ass is hanging off the bed. “Lay down and let me please you.” You comply and watch as Suguru lifts your legs up and buries his face in your cunt. Your hands fly down to his long shiny hair.
“Suguru!” You moan as he licks you from asshole to clit. He sucks on your clit before biting both lips. Your pussy clenches. “Feels s’good Sugu!” You grind down on his talented tongue. Suguru hums into your clit before setting one of you thighs in his shoulder and bringing his fingers to your entrance. He teases you, only pushing his fingers into the joint before taking them out. You cry out in frustration before pulling on his long hair when he finally slides two big fingers into you.
Yours definitely don't compare to his long thick ones. Your back arches off the bed as Suguru fingers jackhammer into you all the while his mouth sucks on your clit.
“S’good Sugu! Don’t stop!” You scream letting go of hair with one hand to cover your loud mouth.
“Don’t hide those sweet moans from me babydoll. If you want my cock, you’ll let me hear you scream my name as you cum on my fingers and mouth.”
You bring you hand back to hair and grind hard as you get closer and closer to orgasm.
“Gonna cum! M’gonna come!” You cry, as you release all over Suguru's face. He moans and sucks even harder before adding another finger. You cry at the sudden intrusion. It doesn't take long before you’re coming all over again, this time liquid shooting out of you and onto Sugu’s chest.
“Yes baby, that's it—what a good girl,” He praises as he slurps up all your juices. “Such a fucking good gril f’me.”
“Gimme a kiss.” You say between heavy breaths.
“Does the pretty girl want kiss?” You nod, pulling Suguru down with you by the shoulders.
“Want you to kiss me while you fuck me for the first time. Want it to be special,” You confess shyly. Suguru leans down and pecks you on the forehead, then the nose, and then both of your cheeks.
“Don’ tease meanie!” You laugh when he kisses the corner of your lips.
“M’sorry baby, can you forgive me?” He pouts.
“Hmm—I’ll forgive you only if you kiss me right no—” You don’t even finish your sentence before Suguru shoves his tongue down your throat. You kiss him back and your tongues fight for dominance. Suguru wins and smiles into the kiss. You can’t believe this is happening. Your bully, your stepbrother, your mystery man is kissing you right now. Your about to make love with said man.
“You okay babydoll?”
“Mhm, just can’t believe this is all happening.”
“Me too beautiful, you sure you want to do this right now? We can always wait.”
“No, I want to. I want you.” You raise your hand to tuck his hair behind his ear. He smiles, showing you that adorable dimple. You kiss it.
Suguru kisses your lips once more before he grabs his cock, rubbing it up and down your cunt.
“Fuck—I don’t have a condom.”
“I’m on the pill—please Sugu.” You beg, frustrated from all this foreplay. You’ve been on edge since last tight in the tub.
“Alight beautiful,” He pushes the head of his cock into you. “Fuck me—you feel so good. Always knew you would.” You feel his fist guide his long cock into you. You moan. He fits you perfectly.
“Sugu—feel’s s’good, want more!” You cry, fisting the blanket’s underneath you.
“Does my baby want more—does she want to orgasm on my cock?” You nod watching Suguru lift your legs to his shoulder. He leans down, bringing your feet to the side of your head. You whine at the stretch.
Suguru groans as he pulls his cock in and out of you.
“S’too much!” You moan into his shoulder. He just laughs and picks up his pace. The fancy headboard above the bed starts to slam against the wall. You watch with blurry eyes as the stock photos hung on the wall shake.
“Said you wanted more baby, ‘m giving you more.” he says before biting into your neck. Hard. You scream, back arching at the pain. Your hands fist the sheets even tighter, knuckles turning white. Suguru unlatches his jaw. Lifting his head to admire his mark. Now all your customers will know you belong to someone. To him. He kisses the mark.
“Sugu, It’s too much. Hurts! m’gonna cum!” You cry, tears soaking the blanket breath you.
“Oh, don't cry baby—shhh—you’re so beautiful y/n. So damn pretty.” He whispers, coaxing you to orgasm. Your eyes roll to the back of your head. You stop breathing for a second as your pussy contracts around Suguru's cock. Suguru follows in suit, spurting his cum deep inside your pussy.
“Fuck,” he draws out, collapsing onto you.
“T-that was—”
“The best sex ‘ve ever had.”
“Same.” You smile before wincing.
“What’s wrong babydoll.”
“You're about to break my damn hip if you keep my legs up any longer,” Suguru lefts himself enough to bring your legs to his sides. “And you probably ripped a chunk of my neck off with that little trick of yours.” You grumble.
“It’s not bad, promise.” He kisses the bite mark softly.
“And all the pictures fell of the wall.”
“I’ll put ‘em back up baby,” He laughs into your ear. “Just let me hold you for a second.” He kisses your cheek before snuggling deeper into you. You throw your arms around his shoulder while you both try to wrap your head around everything that happened.
#𐙚 ࣪ ˖ sugume writes#𐙚 ࣪ ˖ smut journal#geto suguru#geto x reader#jjk geto#geto smut#jujutsu geto#geto scenarios#geto x y/n#geto x you#jjk x y/n#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk smut
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₊˚。⋆❆⋆。˚₊Cool Off₊˚。⋆❆⋆。˚₊
♡︎ pairing: Zayne x fem!reader
。°⚠︎°。MINORS DNI (18+ ONLY)。°⚠︎°。
♡︎ cw: unprotected sex (oops), office sex, semi-public sex, oral sex (f!receiving), fingering, I think that's it?
♡︎ word count: 3.4k
♡︎ synopsis: what to do when you "accidentally" flash your doctor?
♡︎ a/n: I haven't written smut in like three years. So if you think my writing is cringe, just keep scrolling idk.
♡︎ special thanks to my beta reader ♡︎ @its-de ♡︎ for reading and helping me with this
banner by @cafekitsune
You finally have a day off and you want to use this free time to run errands. However, it's also a hot summer day and you need to dress accordingly. After cleaning your apartment and stocking up your fridge, you have -
meet up with your friend
shop for some new summer clothes and bed sheets
doctor’s appointment
You'd just skip the last one because you feel fine, even during the hot weather.
But you know damn well Dr Zayne will not be pleased with you if you do that. And he's not only your doctor now (and a childhood friend), but an actual friend who you spend most of your free time with. Circumstances of him being your assigned physician, some other stuff that happened in the last few months, brought you so much closer that you couldn't help but develop a huge crush on him. And how could you not when he's so kind, warm, attentive, always makes time for you, funny in his own way... you could spend the whole day thinking of all the stuff that makes you want to be more than friends.
Actually, you might be more than just friends. Lately, you’ve been going on a lot of “dates”; visiting festivals, trying new restaurants but also frequenting your favorite ones, dragging him to the arcade… he’s started insisting on being the one to drop you off at home after a night out. Just a couple of weeks ago when you were sick, he came to your place and took care of you. Both of you ended up falling asleep on your bed watching your comfort movie – actually, he wanted to read his book but ended up invested in the plot and eventually fell asleep before you, tired from his shift and nursing you back to health. You had enough strength to get up to pull out a freshly washed blanket from the closet and cover him. You lied back down, finding comfort in watching Zayne’s peaceful sleeping face. That’s how you fell asleep.
The next morning you found yourself waking up on Zayne’s chest, your form enveloping his. He was gently stroking your back, waiting for you to open your eyes. You don’t know whether you were the one that latched onto him during the night, or if he’s the one that pulled you in; nonetheless, it felt surreal to wake up like this. You looked up into his beautiful hazel green eyes, and you just shared a moment of pure intimacy. Then you got self-conscious of him having a close up of your morning face, which made you immediately jump from the bed and sprint to the bathroom. So, he did manage to nurse you back to health in one day.
You really wish he made the first move already. With all the stolen glances, lingering touches, cuddling, you genuinely think he feels the same way. But you are also his patient, so maybe he feels uncomfortable starting anything, like he’s crossing a boundary and abusing his position as your physician? Maybe he’s waiting for you to make the first move?
Or maybe you’re just delusional and ovulating.
Okay, back to the present. You’re not going to pass up the opportunity to see your crush (this is more than just a crush, honestly) and you add one more task to the list
get some dessert for Zayne
And you want to look cute for him, so you opt for your new backless summer dress.
☃︎⋆⁺₊☃︎⋆⁺₊☃︎⋆⁺₊
“Thank fuck, I look okay.” You murmur as you check yourself out in the mirror in the bathroom of Zayne's office.
It's just before 8pm, your scheduled checkup. Both of you were too busy to hang out for more than a week, and you can’t wait to see him. You took this opportunity to leave the heavy shopping bags on the sofa, the bag with dessert on his desk, and quickly freshen up in the bathroom. It was so hot today, still is, but thanks to the dress you didn't sweat that much.
You exit the bathroom the same time he enters the office. You catch how his usually stern gaze behind his glasses softens at the sight of you.
“Hey!” You don’t waste any time and shorten the distance between you, wrapping your arms around his neck giving him a peck on the cheek.
Zayne’s hands stiffly hover over your waist, stunned by the enthusiastic greeting. You always have a big smile on your face when you see him, but you’re only this forward when you have some alcohol in your system. He doesn’t smell it on your breath now though.
“Did you miss me that much, or are you trying to coax me to skip the check up?”
You pull away with a pout and a blush on your cheeks. Feeling a little embarrassed, you go and sit on a chair across his desk, steering the conversation towards the dessert you brought him.
With an entertained smirk, he sat on his chair and indulged in just chatting with you, and making plans for the evening. He feels at ease now that you’re here.
Zayne cuts the conversation short to take care of some paperwork, so you entertain yourself with your phone, checking what cafes are open. You sit there in silence, not wanting to disturb him. The room is air-conditioned and you would think you'd start to cool down, but it's impossible to do so when your crush is right across you. You try to focus on your phone but your eyes keep darting between the screen and Zayne’s handsome focused features…his hand holding the pen… his long fingers...
“You need to ask me something?” Zayne peers over his glasses.
Busted!
For like a hundredth time.
You fidget in your seat. “Um, no. I don’t wanna disturb you.”
He closes a file and puts papers aside. “I’m done. Go ahead.”
You make up how you wanted to ask him if he wanted to visit the café on your screen, only to for him to point out it’s closed when you show it to him. Not smooth at all.
You nervously scratch your back, and that when it hits you. You didn't wear a bra today!
In your defense, of course you're not going to wear a bra with the backless dress and when it's so hot outside, and it would be okay if this was just a hangout, but the main reason why you're here is because of the check up! Well, now you're getting even more flustered and you can feel nervous sweat forming everywhere. Great.
Zayne's voice fades into focus.
"Is everything okay?"
“Yeah, let’s just go find a cafe that’s nearby!” You prop yourself to sit up and make a run for it, but the seriousness in Zayne’s tone stops you.
“You’re not going anywhere.”
You wave your hand “I feel great, you don't need to -"
"That's good to hear." He humors you, setting the stethoscope around his neck, eyes not leaving yours.
You engage in a short staring contest, but you never win those with him. You hold back the bratty whine as you get up and walk towards the chair. Should you address this? What would be more awkward – saying that you don’t have a bra on or just slipping off the top of the dress, flashing him? But Zayne is a professional; he probably saw plenty of breasts from other patients and didn’t bat an eye. And maybe he even noticed that you’re braless.
You sit on the chair next to him and Zayne gives you an amused look. “Good girl.”
It was like a reflex - the moment you heard those words, your hands slipped off the top of your dress. Zayne pauses, his eyes locked at the sight before him. Oh shit, did you manage to make the situation awkward after all? Just when you wanted to open your mouth to say anything, he blinks and proceeds to do what he’s supposed to do. You suck in a breath when the icy cold stethoscope touches your chest spreading goosebumps across your skin, making your nipples hard. Zayne's eyes are focused somewhere to the side, but you can see light redness peppered on his cheeks. The two of you sit there in silence while he checks your heartbeat. You try to compose yourself, take slow breaths, but your heart is giving you away.
When he’s done, he takes off the instrument and places it on the table. He clears his throat “Nothing irregular, your heartbeat is a little faster, but the heat is probably to blame.”
Right, the heat.
You hope that the redness, still on his face, and his ears, is not from the sun.
Again, you have two choices – do you pull the top up and act like nothing happened, continue the same ‘will they, won’t they’ routine – or do you want to do something about this, take the first step and find out once and for all if this infatuation is one sided?
You take his hand, making him look at you, ‘Well, can you help me cool down, Doctor?’
Zayne eyes widen slightly, switching between your hand and your gaze, only guessing where you’re going with this.
You gently place his cold hand just above your left breast ‘Is this okay?’ you whisper.
Zayne’s irises are almost black from how dilated his pupils are. As he gazes into your doe eyes, the hand resting on your chest travels up across your skin and lands on the side of your neck. He takes off his glasses, leans towards you, his lips a breath away from yours, “You’re walking on thin ice, darling.”
He grabs you by the back of your neck and pulls you into a searing kiss. Zayne is kissing you like a man starved, like he's been waiting for this for so long, afraid that this moment will slip away all too quickly. His other hand wraps tightly around your waist, pulling you closer, pressing your chests together, feeling each other’s heartbeats. You moan into the kiss, surprised by the intensity of it and the desperation of his embrace. His lips are so soft and tender, just like you imagined too many times. The hand on your waist travels up to grab your breast, the sensation of his big cold hand on your heated skin making you gasp against his lips. He seizes the moment to lick your bottom lip, then slipping his tongue, yours quickly meeting it.
Suddenly, both of his hands land on your shoulders pulling away.
He utters ‘fuck’ (this might be the first time hearing him say the f word, and you’re embarrassed how excited it made you.) He holds your chin with thumb and index finger, ‘Do you wish to continue?’
You utter ‘yes’ and grab him by the black necktie locking your lips again. His hands find the top of your thighs, then sneaking their way down to bunch up your dress over your knees.
“Hold onto me.” He murmurs between kisses, and you oblige, catching onto his shoulders. Zayne grabs you by the back of your soft thighs, lifting you from the chair and placing you on his desk, so effortlessly and swiftly, like you weigh nothing.
Your fingers comb through his soft, thick hair, relishing in the fact of being able to touch it like this. His hands cup your face, distancing his lips from yours. You expectantly look up to see his tender, yearning gaze. He looks like he’s about to say something, but then he kisses you again, this time softly, slowly deepening it, stealing your breath away. His soft lips move to kiss and nip at the side of your neck, his hands giving attention to your breasts again. He caresses both of them, and it doesn’t take long for one of his hands to be replaced by his lips. His hot tongue teases around the nipple. But when he starts sucking on it, while simultaneously playing with the other one with his fingers, a loud moan escapes your lips.
Zayne’s smirks against the sensitive nipple, “You need to stay quiet, darling.”
You were so dazed with lust that you completely forgot that there could be people outside his office. You bite your bottom lip and nod.
He nuzzles into the crook of your neck, one hand bunching up your dress more and resting on your hip, while the one on your nipple sneaks its way down, teasing the band of your underwear. You feel his fingers slide down, rubbing you over your soaked panties, making you move your hips, craving more friction.
“Fuck.” He breathes against your ear, “You’re already so wet for me.”
The fingers travel towards the band of your underwear and tug on it, and you lift your hips to let him slide it down your legs. Then he stashes your panties into the pocket of his pants.
He catches you by surprise when he kneels down in front of your cunt, your legs closing on reflex, but Zayne grabs your thighs before they could squish his head.
He gently strokes them, "Let me see you."
You’re hesitant about it, but you remember that you took extra steps when you freshened up in the bathroom. Slowly, you spread your legs, lifting your feet to rest on the edge of the desk. Cool air against your soaked pussy sends shivers all over your body.
His hands rest on the plush of your inner thighs. His eyes are mesmerized by the sight in front of him. You almost feel self-conscious by the close-up he’s getting.
"Zayne –" You squirm under his stare.
Snapping out of his daze, he meets your eyes "I’m sorry. You’re just so much more beautiful than I imagined."
Than he imagined? The statement makes your cheeks even deeper red, your pussy more wet and impatient.
Feeling impatient himself, Zayne starts by placing gentle kisses on your inner thigh. The hand on the opposite side follows the same trail, his slender fingers stopping to tease your wet folds, the contact making you gasp and involuntarily clench your thighs.
"Relax, angel." His breath fans over your pussy, not making it easier but you try anyway.
The digits slowly glide over the wetness, bathing in your juices. Your hips flinch as his fingertips lightly circle your clit, thighs trembling as digits are replaced with his hot tongue. It glides flat over your folds, stopping to circle the sensitive nub. The tip of the tongue flicks over it, circles it, again and again, your cunt dripping with both his saliva and your arousal. His middle finger slides in, ring finger shortly after, curling to reach and rub that delicate spot inside you; he sucks and licks your clit while finger fucking you, and your thighs are now shaking, toes curling, as intense waves of pleasure course through your body.
Your hold onto Zayne’s hair, and roll your hips in the same rhythm of his fingers, chasing your release, "Zayne… I’m gonna–"
He locks eyes with you and continues what he’s doing; you come shortly after, covering your mouth with your hand.
Zayne helps you come down from your high, places soft pecks on your thighs again and stands up, pulling you into another breathtaking kiss.
Your hands frantically find his belt and start unbuckling it.
Zayne breaks the kiss, ‘I don’t have any condoms here.’
You shrug ‘Just pull out.’
‘That’s not very respo – ‘
‘Well, you’re a doctor; you can prescribe me some plan b pills.’ you innocently flutter your lashes.
He chuckles and starts taking off his tie and shirt, and you take a moment to gaze at the strong, chiseled muscles of his torso, his arms and those shoulders. Zayne, amused at your dazed and shameless ogling of his shirtless physique, reaches down to unzip his pants, taking them and underwear off in the same go, his hard cock smacking against his shaved pelvis. You suck in a breath when your eyes land on it. He's long and thick, curved just right, tip glistening with so much precum. You hand wraps around it, stroking and feeling the pulsing veins under your touch.
Zayne’s breath hitches ‘Are you sure – fuck…’ He groans when you press his length against your slippery folds, teasingly moving your hips.
‘Yes… I need you.’
With those magic words, Zayne swipes all the papers off the table, grabs you behind the knees and lifts your legs further, and you lean back to rest on your elbows.
His dick strokes your slit, tip teasing the entrance, but you're so impatient.
'Zaynee-' you whine.
He closes his eyes, jaw clenched. Even though your ‘friend’ is the embodiment of calm and collected, right now he’s barely holding onto his composure. His flushed cheeks and red ears, ragged breathing are exposing how badly he wanted, needed, this and how he’s trying so hard not to cum right here before even slipping the tip in.
But he doesn’t want to wait any longer; with your needy whines spurring him on, he places his red cockhead against you, your drenched pussy making it easy to slide it in.
His leg muscles tremble, trying to restrain himself from bottoming out the same second; with shallow thrusts, he slowly slides it all the way in. He towers over you, one hand resting on the desk, the other cupping your face. His hips roll at languid pace, his hooded eyes never leaving your face, watching you adjust to his size.
As you get comfortable, you grab him by back of his neck “Faster, please…” You breathe. He leans down, locking your lips into a sloppy kiss.
He slowly picks up the pace, his hand starts playing with your nipples again, and now it's really hard keep your voice down. You keep breaking the kiss in desperate need to catch your breath, but moans escape your lips as well. Zayne grabs your upper arms and pushes you down further. His muscular torso pressed against yours, his pelvis rubbing against your clit.
“Zayne - I'm close”
“Try to stay quiet, angel.” he grunts, his eyes locked on your face, beads of sweat forming on his forehead. He angles himself so his hand can reach down and rub your clit, and it’s too much for you - you cum a few seconds later and Zayne has to slip two fingers of his other hand into your mouth to keep you from screaming. You still whimper and moan over his fingers. He slows down to help you ride out the orgasm, and pulls out the fingers to kiss your lips.
'Is it okay to pick up the pace now? I'm so close.'
You only nod, unable to form any words. He plants a kiss on your temple and moves onto kissing and sucking your neck. Then he goes back to just looking at your face while he picks up the pace, your legs locking around his waist, pulling him even deeper. You bite your bottom lip, but at this point, you feel it's impossible to stay quiet. And now it's not only you who is making noise, but the desk, although sturdy, is starting to move and creak.
You gasp as he suddenly lifts you off the table with his big arms wrapped around your torso. You wrap your arms around his neck, holding onto him. His hands grabs your ass and starts moving your hips in unison with his, his throbbing dick thrusting so much deeper, all the juices leaking down his balls and onto the floor.
You latch your teeth onto his neck to keep yourself from screaming while he’s panting feverishly into your ear.
‘I’m gonna come soon –‘
You meet his gaze ‘Don’t pull out.’
His hips stutter at your words, eyes widening for a second. He curses under his breath and picks up the pace. You pull him into a sloppy kiss, lewd gasps and pants interrupting.
His hands squeezing your ass in a bruising grip, he grunts against your lips, and you feel intense throbbing of his cock; warm liquid filling you up, sending shivers all over your sweaty body.
His slow pumps let his thick cum drip out, making a mess of his pants and the floor. You can feel how fast his heart is beating against your chest. The two of you catch your breath as your lips share a languid kiss, enjoying the warmth of each other’s bodies.
After pulling out, Zayne sits you on his chair. He kneels in front of you, caresses your cheek, his eyes full of adoration. “I never thought our first time would look like this.”
You lean into his palm, looking at him with sweet innocent eyes, “Oh? What did you imagine then?”
“I can show you later.”
#my writing needs to be hornier#guess i'm back to writing#love and deepspace#zayne love and deepspace#zayne x reader#zayne smut#love and deepspace smut#zayne x you#lads zayne
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Kinktober 01/10/2024 Max Verstappen- Voyerism
Plot: Max cannot help but take pictures or videos of you whenever you guys get heated! But what happens when he’s leaving you for a long time.
Warnings: Kinktober, Smut, pillow humping, VOYERISM, masturbation, watched unknowingly etc. 18+ Minors DNI
Max was obsessed with you.
Not in like a creepy stalker way, but in a more … you were his person kind of way.
Every time you came to a race, all he would do is follow you around. His team? Didn’t exist. Christian Horner? Who is that? Sergio Perez? Not sure who you mean.
His interviews were 90% staring at you and 10% listening and answering the interviewer. It actually got to the point, that even though it wasn’t affecting his driving Christian threatened to black-list you from all F1 races.
Max of course didn’t take this lightly.
Due to Max’s obsession with you, when you couldn’t attend race weekends he was sort of lost, just in this limbo area of his mind with nothing to do. Especially if you were doing a modelling gig and didn’t have much time throughout the day to answer him.
So he started to film you, in your more intimate moments to feel closer to you when you were away as the more you started to do, the bigger you were getting and the bigger you got the more you were booked in for.
But it didn’t stop there, once he got to a race weekend and became particularly frustrated he realised how much these videos helped him let off some steam when you weren’t there to help him.
Of course you knew about the videos. It was something fun for you and Max to do to liven up your sex life when you were together.
But then Max became obsessed with the idea of you not knowing when he was playing these videos just for himself. You were unassuming at a shoot, strutting your stuff and he was there tangled up in the sheets of a hotel room in Italy, using one hand to jerk himself off while the other held up his second video of the two of you of the night.
When he would come home, he’d start to watch you get undressed and shower from the crack in the bathroom door that he needed to get fixed but because he felt like he was never home he didn’t ever bother. He would make sure to tell you wrong times that he would get home, just at the off chance he might be able to catch you in a private moment to yourself, hearing those little noises you made and calling out his name as if you knew he was there.
Then came the bedroom camera. Max never told you about this camera, why would he … it was his apartment after all. That’s what he told himself when he was thinking of the idea.
It was one of those motion-activated ones, and he installed it just before a triple header, above the wardrobe in between two show boxes, and unless you were looking specifically for a camera you definitely wouldn’t be able to see it.
“Bye baby I’m going to miss you! Look I’ll try and make it out to your home race. But good luck for the first ones, I love you so so much” you smiled at him kissing all over his face.
“Mmmm I’ll miss you too, don’t know how I’ll last without my gorgeous girl” he sighs before leaving.
But that was a lie, he knew exactly how he would last without you. He knew that camera in the bedroom would make him feel as though he was at home with you. Even if he was just watching you sleep or get changed like he normally did when you both got ready with each other in the mornings.
He waited and waited, pulling his phone out every-time the custom haptic vibration he’d made for the app that linked the camera to his phone so he knew what it was buzzed..
Mostly it was just you doing house chores and bringing washing back to the bedroom to put it away in the closets or changing the bedsheets now that he’d be gone for three weeks so they’d be fresh for when he was back home. He missed you changing the first time because he was out with Lando, Oscar and Charles playing Paddle and his phone was in his gym bag.
He of course rewatched it but he just sort of found it sweet watching you do the same routine you did even when he wasn’t there, only missing out a few steps that normally involved him.
It wasn’t until the night before his first race that he was laying in his hotel room, exhausted from the day he’d had in qualifying and staying late to train on the sim against the teams orders that he saw you more intimately on the cameras.
You’d come into the room rather naturally actually. You had a large cup of water with ice and a straw which wasn’t uncommon for you before you went to bed. You then sat on top of the duvet covers with your back propped up with the pillows against the back board as you put something on the TV.
And you pretty much got through the whole film just watching it drinking your water slowly and eating the snacks you’d brought with you.
He saw you get a little fidgety towards the end but you never were one for sitting still for long periods of time. So he didn’t think anything off it and nearly clicked off for the night until you got your phone up.
He immediately saw the bite of your lip as you started scrolling.
He sat up more awake and alert than he had been the last hour of watching you on and off while you watched your film. He was curious about what was on your phone that was making you bite your lip.
However once he heard the audio come from your phone he was all too familiar with what you were watching. It was a video he’d taken during the last time you guys had had sex with one another. He knew immediately because of what he said at the start of the video.
“Are you going to be a good girl for me while I’m gone?” And when he heard himself say that, he could feel something in him stir.
It excited him, the thought that you were just as desperate and needy as he was.
He watched as one hand travelled down into your silk shorts as you spread you legs open giving you easier access. He watched as you hand grazed over you clit, he couldn’t see much right now with those shorts still on but the light airy moan that he heard through the cameras audio was enough to let him know what your fingers had just brushed against.
He couldn’t even really tell if you were just rubbing yourself through your panties or if you’d pulled them to the side and he wanted to know more. He wanted and needed to see more.
When you made that face, the one where something stated to feel really good that’s when he knew you’d dipped your fingers in a little further, only to test the waters. Your legs closed around your hand as he could hear those sweet noises still coming from you.
You attempted to prop the phone up against your knees but he could see your frustration as it kept sliding down at an angle you could view it.
Max was already hard as a rock from just watching you lightly touch yourself but when you spun round so that you were facing away from him, propping the phone up on the top of the headboard and placing a pillow underneath you he pulled himself right out of his pants.
He almost felt like a pervert but he convinced himself if he told you what he’d done or was doing you’d love the idea. He knew you better than you knew yourself.
His hand rubbed quickly up and down his length as he watched you hump a pillow, which was of course one of his usual ones. Your moans came through the camera way clearer than he had expected.
What caught him and nearly had him letting go of that growing feeling was when you moaned his name.
“Max, fuck please” you’d groaned and the camera had picked it up perfectly, his jaw dropped and his hand sped up seeing the stuttering of your hips into the pillow meaning you were also close.
He kept watching you completely obsessed with everything he was seeing.
“Come on baby, come for me” he called and as if you’d heard him you were shaking, moaning and gasping into the other pillows while your hips drove down into the pillow riding out your high.
Max came watching that wet spot grow on your panties from the angle your currently were at. He couldn’t believe that this was only the begging of the night. And when you turned round pulling your underwear off and you went into the special draw by your shared bed, he knew you’d both be in for a long long night.
Taglist:
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#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 x you#formula 1#formula one#formula one fanfiction#formula one x y/n#formula one x you#formula one x reader#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 fic#formula 1 fanfic#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen fluff#max verstappen x you#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen fanfic#max verstappen f1#max verstappen#mv1 x you#mv33 imagine#mv33 fic#mv1 fic#mv1 imagine#mv33 x reader#mv1 x reader#mv33#mv1#max verstappen smut
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𝗣𝗘𝗘𝗣𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗧𝗢𝗠. — (정원)
pairing. stepbrother!jungwon x reader (ft. mystery enha member x reader) word count. 54k
warning. contains themes of heavy slow-burn plot, dubious consent (dubcon), non-consensual voyeurism, emotional manipulation, degradation, humiliation, gaslighting, manipulation, step-sibling incest, intense power dynamics, possessiveness, obsession, rough sex, cheating, spying, mentions of bodily fluids, alcohol use, mild coercion, dark themes, and explicit sexual content (18+). mdni.
living with jungwon has always been easy—sure, he's lazy, sure, he doesn’t have a job, but you loved your stepbrother anyway. but when someone else steps into your life, threatening the peace he's fought to keep, you start to wonder just how far jungwon will go to protect the life he's built around you... and what he's willing to do to keep it that way.
co-written with @jaeyunsmochi she helped me with this, and i cannot thank her enough for all her input.
families were supposed to come together out of love, not convenience. that’s what you used to believe, anyway. after your dad passed and your mom remarried, everything changed. it wasn’t just grief anymore; suddenly, you had this new family dropped into your life, and you were expected to accept it. just like that. jungwon came into your life when you were both barely teenagers, awkward and trying to figure out how to exist in a world that felt like it was constantly shifting under your feet. back then, he was more like a shadow than anything else. always there, but never in your way. he’d hover near your bedroom door, quiet, not saying much, but his presence was always... there. comforting, in a strange way. he was clingy, yeah, but you didn’t mind it. he’d tag along after school, sitting beside you on the couch, waiting for you to pick the show. you’d flick his forehead when he said something dumb, and he’d laugh, wide-eyed and innocent, like everything was easy. and back then? it was. you didn’t think much of it. jungwon was just your stepbrother. harmless. you even joked about it with your friends sometimes, saying he was too attached. but it was no big deal—just the way things were. that was then. now, it’s different. you’re not sure when it happened, but somewhere along the way, jungwon stopped being the awkward kid who hung around doorways. he grew up. and so did you. you didn’t notice it right away, probably because you were too wrapped up in your own life—dating, college, figuring yourself out. but recently... you’ve felt the changes. the air feels heavier between you now. jungwon’s not that scrawny boy anymore. he’s taller, broader, his shoulders filling out his clothes in a way that’s impossible to ignore. there’s a quiet confidence in him now that wasn’t there before. when he passes by in the hallway, there’s this tension. something new. your mom even points out how the neighborhood girls are always trying to get his attention, but he never seems interested. and that’s the thing—he doesn’t seem interested in anyone. not in the way you’d expect. at first, you thought maybe he was just focused on school. maybe even... gay. for a while, you were convinced of it. but then, you remembered the stuff you’d accidentally seen—his porn history popping up on the family computer a few times said otherwise. okay, so... he definitely wasn't gay. threesomes, bdsm, no other dicks included, some other kinky stuff, hell even stepsister porn. you teased him about it when you caught him, his face turning red as he slammed the laptop shut. back then, you laughed it off. just teenage boy stuff, right? but now, it's like you’re seeing him through a different lens. it’s not just jungwon, though. jake and sunghoon, his best friends, grew up too. they came into the picture a few years after jungwon, and back then, they were dorky, awkward, always cracking dumb jokes and geeking out over games. they were like brothers to you, in a way. except jungwon, but that was always a different story. now, they’re not those awkward kids anymore. jake’s taller, leaner, and those messy curls that once made him look boyish now make girls turn their heads. sunghoon traded in his glasses for contacts, hit the gym, and suddenly he’s got this bad-boy charm that leaves girls staring.
watching them change from the boys you knew into confident men—men who now tower over you—it’s weird. it’s like you missed the transition, and now you’re left catching up. you’d always been the big sister figure, offering advice, guiding them through awkward phases. but now, they look at you differently too. you feel it. jake’s compliments linger a little longer, sunghoon’s teasing has this edge to it, flirty, suggestive. they don’t cross any lines, but the dynamic has clearly shifted. you’re not sure how to handle it. but, as always, you had to grow up faster than they did. when you graduated, your mom and stepdad left the flat to you and jungwon. just the two of you again, trying to figure out adulthood. you’d drifted apart during those college years—he found his group, you focused on boys, academics, trying to figure out who you were. but now, somehow, you’ve drifted back together. maybe it’s because you’re both older now, more mature. living with jungwon feels... natural. comforting, even. but at the same time, it’s not easy anymore. not when you see him like this—strong, confident. not when you feel this attraction building up inside you. and it’s not just his appearance. it’s the way he’s always around. not in a clingy way like before, but always choosing to be near you. it makes you wonder if it’s just out of convenience or if maybe... maybe he feels it too. that pull. that connection. you love him, of course you do. he’s your stepbrother. but these feelings... they’re twisted, wrong. and you keep telling yourself they’ll pass. that it’s just some messed-up phase. but the more time you spend alone with him in the apartment, the more the tension builds, pulling you toward something you know you shouldn’t want.
but you can’t shake it. your love life isn’t helping either. after years of failed relationships—guys who got bored or cheated—you’ve started to wonder if maybe the problem is you. are you not enough? you’ve vented to jake and sunghoon about it, and they always tell you the same thing—you’re beautiful, smart, any guy would be lucky to have you. but their words don’t ease the loneliness. and then, there’s jungwon. you can’t help but compare every guy to him. none of them measure up to his quiet strength, his presence. it’s driving you insane, and you know using him as a standard is wrong. but you can’t stop. he’s still attached to you. not like before, but he’s always there. and sometimes, you wonder if it’s out of convenience, because he just doesn't want to be bothered paying rent, or if he feels it too—that pull. whatever it is, it’s messing with your head. you’ve tried to distract yourself, but with your job draining you and no real outlet, it’s impossible. the flat feels more like his than yours—sleek, minimal, no warmth. it’s functional. just like him. but hey, it worked. your mornings are always the same. you stumble out of bed, hair a mess, half-asleep, and drag yourself to the kitchen for caffeine. and there he is, already on the couch, headset on, yelling into his mic like it’s the end of the world. his voice is the first thing you hear, every single day—not the birds outside, not the traffic. just him. “jake, for fuck’s sake, move!” jungwon’s voice cut through the quiet of the flat, his fingers mashing at the controller. you stood at the kitchen counter, pouring cereal into a bowl, your eyes drifting to where he sat on the couch. he leaned forward, whole body tense, muscles shifting under his skin every time his hands tightened on the controller. veins popped out on his forearms, and his focus was locked in, jaw clenched. his hair was a damp mess from his shower, still tousled and drying. jungwon’s bare back, smooth and broad, contrasted against the dark, worn leather of the couch he spent most of his time on. as usual, he was shirtless, lounging in a pair of low-hanging grey boxers. it was a constant reminder of how much had changed. he wasn’t the lanky stepbrother who used to hover by your door anymore—jungwon was all grown up, and you noticed every inch of it. “can you keep it down?” you called, half-exasperated, setting your bowl on the counter as you reached for the milk. he didn’t look at you, muttering under his breath, clearly more invested in his game than acknowledging your presence. you could hear jake’s voice muffled through the headset, followed by sunghoon’s laughter. “jesus,” you muttered, rolling your eyes. grabbing your bowl, you wandered over to the couch and sat next to him, closer than you needed to be, leaning in just enough to be in his space. his shoulder brushed against yours, but he didn’t even flinch, eyes still glued to the screen. you nudged him with your elbow, a grin tugging at your lips. “wanna share the screen? looks like you’re losing.” he swatted at you lazily, not breaking his focus. “can you not?” he grumbled, frustration obvious in his voice as gunfire crackled through his headset.
jake’s voice came through, amused. “dude, is that y/n again?” “yep,” sunghoon added with a laugh. “tell her to fuck off before we lose.” “i’m not doing anything,” you smirked, crunching obnoxiously on a spoonful of cereal. “just enjoying my breakfast.” jungwon shot you a quick glare, his brow furrowed, and you couldn’t help but find it a little endearing. he acted annoyed, but this was your thing. pestering him was fun, and deep down, you knew he liked it. even if he’d never admit it. you shifted beside him, your shorts riding up slightly, which caught his attention for a split second. his eyes flicked down to your legs, a quick glance, but you didn’t notice. he clenched the controller tighter, jaw set as he forced himself to focus on the game. “you’re so annoying,” he muttered, but there wasn’t any real bite to it, making you grin wider. leaning into him more, you let your head rest on his shoulder. “can’t help it. you’re just so easy to mess with.” “stop it,” sunghoon’s voice came through the headset again, exasperated. “seriously, let him play. he’s already fucking up.” “i’m not fucking up!” jungwon shot back, defensive, his voice faltering slightly. you snickered under your breath, watching him try to focus despite how close you were. without thinking, you grabbed the controller from his hands, holding it out of his reach. “wanna see if i can do better?” “y/n, come on,” he growled, lunging toward you to snatch it back, but you dodged, grinning like a fool. “admit it, i’m way more fun than this stupid game,” you teased, waving the controller in the air. jungwon leaned in again, his hand brushing against your thigh as he reached for the controller, his fingers circling your wrist in a firm grip. the touch made you freeze for a second. his hand lingered just a bit too long before he pulled away, his face suddenly serious. “just give it back,” he muttered, his voice low, controlled. your heartbeat kicked up, but you handed it back. “jeez, relax.” as he took the controller, his fingers brushed yours, sending a shiver up your arm. for a moment, the air felt heavy, charged with something you didn’t want to think too much about. “you’re stronger than you look,” you said quietly, more to break the silence than anything. he didn’t look at you, just smirked slightly, still focused on the game. “you’re just weaker than you think.” “fuck off,” you laughed, though your mind lingered on how easily he could’ve overpowered you if he wanted to. snap out of it, y/n. sunghoon’s voice cut through the headset again. “about time she let go of the controller. man, you’re way too soft on her.”
jake chimed in, laughing. “if i had a sister, she wouldn’t even get near my stuff.” you rolled your eyes, chuckling as you grabbed your phone off the coffee table. a text from your boss flashed on the screen. jay from seattle will be at the office by noon. show him around. “ugh, i forgot i have to babysit some new guy at work today,” you groaned, slumping back down next to jungwon. “already tired of annoying me?” jungwon asked, glancing at you as his character respawned. “i was supposed to have the day off,” you sighed dramatically. “now i have to play tour guide for some guy named jay. transferred from seattle. sounds like a blast.” the volume of the game was loud enough that you could hear jake and sunghoon laughing. “maybe jay’s hot,” jake teased. “seattle guys have that brooding, rugged thing going on, right?” you snorted. “yeah, right. knowing my luck, he’s probably some middle-aged dude with bad breath who smells like stale coffee and has a comb-over.” “or,” jake continued, “he could be exactly what you need. you’ve been working non-stop. loosen up a bit.” jungwon glanced at you, his expression unreadable. “you wouldn’t know what to do with him even if he was hot.” your eyebrow shot up at the slight challenge in his voice. “oh, really?” he didn’t look away this time, a faint smirk tugging at his lips. “you’re too uptight. all you do is work.” “i’m not uptight,” you shot back, crossing your arms. “i just have my shit together. someone has to feed your lazy ass.” jake and sunghoon’s laughter rang through the headset, but jungwon didn’t smile. instead, he shrugged, his tone softer. “nothing’s gonna happen with this jay guy.”
you blinked, caught off guard by his sudden seriousness. “and how would you know?” he didn’t answer, focusing back on the screen, his fingers pressing the buttons a little too aggressively. as you stood up to head back to your room, jungwon’s phone lit up on the coffee table, vibrating softly. you leaned forward, trying to catch a glimpse of the name on the screen, but jungwon noticed, flipping it over quickly. “what’s that about?” you asked, narrowing your eyes at him. “none of your business,” he muttered, keeping his gaze fixed on the TV, his voice tight. your jaw dropped as you turned to jungwon. “wait, you’re seeing someone?” jungwon sighed, clearly irritated. “they’re exaggerating. it’s nothing." “nothing?” sunghoon’s voice broke through the headset, laughter lacing his tone. “pretty sure she’s been over a few times, man.” you stared at jungwon, genuinely taken aback. he’s been seeing someone and didn’t tell me? you thought you were close. close enough that if there was someone new in his life—someone he was bringing over to the flat—you’d be the first to know. but no, he kept it to himself. a pang of something settled in your chest, annoyance creeping up at how easily he brushed it off like it was no big deal. what else has he been hiding? sure, you and him had your boundaries, but he told you everything. or so you thought. “you’ve been seeing someone and didn’t tell me?” you asked, your voice betraying the slight sting of being left in the dark. jungwon’s face flushed just the tiniest bit, and you noticed how his eyes narrowed, defensive. “it’s not like that. it’s… not serious.”
not serious? you couldn’t stop the thoughts from spiraling a little. so she’s been here more than once? this wasn’t just a random hookup. there was someone coming over, sleeping in the same flat, and you had no idea. “wow,” you muttered, trying to process the information. “and here i thought you barely left the house.” jungwon rubbed the back of his neck, visibly uncomfortable. “she comes over sometimes. it’s no big deal.” no big deal, huh? something in you couldn’t help but feel annoyed. it was stupid, but maybe part of you expected to be more in the loop with him, to know when things changed like this. and damn, if he was seeing someone, that girl was hella lucky. your eyes flicked to jungwon’s frame, you could just picture it—jungwon fucking someone into the mattress. he could probably break a girl apart, the way his body moved, the way he stayed composed even when his temper flared. fuck, why were you even thinking about this?
the thought made your stomach turn with a weird mixture of disgust and guilt, your mind snapping back to reality. what the hell, y/n? that’s your stepbrother you’re thinking about, for fuck’s sake. you leaned back, arms crossing over your chest as you tried to shake the lingering thoughts. “well, i’m happy for you. about time you found someone. maybe now you’ll stop being so moody all the time.” “piss off, y/n,” he muttered, but the way he said it lacked the usual bite. you grinned, moving a little closer, determined to push his buttons just a bit more. “i’d love to meet her, though. see what kind of girl puts up with you.” jungwon’s entire expression shifted, his jaw tightening as he shot you a sharp glance. “not happening.” your smile faded slightly. “why not?” “because it’s nothing,” he snapped, a little more forceful this time. his eyes flicked away from yours, the tension in his voice unmistakable. you raised your hands in surrender, laughing lightly to break the tension. “alright, alright. i’ll drop it. for now.”
as you stood up to head back to your room, that strange unease in your chest lingered, creeping up your spine like something wasn’t quite right. just as you reached the hallway, your phone buzzed again. a message from your boss—jay is on his way. you groaned softly, already feeling the weight of the day pressing down on you. "looks like jay’s gonna be here sooner than i thought," you muttered mostly to yourself, dreading the responsibility that came with showing him around. you weren’t in the mood for it, not today. jungwon paused the game, glancing at you over his shoulder, hearing jake and sunghoon still shouting through the headset. he ignored them, focusing on you instead, eyes narrowing just a bit, “you don’t have to do it, you know.” you turned to him, confused by his sudden comment. "what? of course, i do. it’s my job." he shrugged, leaning back against the couch, "you’re always working. you don’t have to take on everything. they can find someone else to do it." you raised an eyebrow, catching the subtle edge in his voice, something almost too quick, too dismissive. since when did he care about my workload?
"since when do you care about how much I work?" you asked, half-joking but genuinely curious. "i don’t," he muttered, his words coming out a little too fast, his attention flicking back to the game, fingers tightening on the controller. "just... you never take a break. let someone else handle the boring shit for once.” what the hell was that about? you let out a soft laugh, shaking your head. "yeah, well, someone’s gotta pay for this flat and feed you." “i can take care of myself,” he grumbled, but there was something off about the way he said it. like he was trying to convince himself more than you, the usual sharpness in his voice missing. "really?" you teased, leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed. "you? mr. video game addict who barely leaves the house unless it’s with jake and sunghoon?" he scoffed, but it sounded forced. "i go out," he snapped, though the defensiveness in his tone only made you laugh more. it was like he couldn’t handle the thought of you not taking him seriously.
"oh, right. to jog. very social of you," you shot back, smirking, trying to lighten the weird tension that had settled between you. “i said, i can take care of myself,” he repeated, his voice quieter this time, almost like he didn’t fully believe it. his eyes flickered up to meet yours for a split second before he quickly looked away, pretending to focus back on the game. you smirked, pushing off the doorframe, but the unease in your chest only grew. “sure, you can.” what was his problem? there was something about the way he brushed off the conversation, acting so casual but clearly irritated by something. the mention of jay? was that what was getting under his skin? but why would that even bother him? you shook your head, trying to dismiss the thought. jungwon was just being… well, jungwon. moody, defensive, sometimes hard to read. the weight of it followed you, pressing against your thoughts as you tried to focus on the day ahead, already dreading dealing with jay and the endless office bullshit. just what you needed—more distractions when your mind was already a fucking mess.
you pulled into the office parking lot, fingers tapping idly on the steering wheel as some random song played in the background. you weren’t even listening—your mind was too busy spiraling with thoughts about the day ahead. how the hell are you going to explain to jay just how toxic this place is? the office politics alone could suck the life out of anyone, and your boss? well, he was a nightmare. you didn’t exactly envy jay, but then again, you didn’t even know what kind of person he was yet. as you scanned the parking lot, your eyes landed on a man standing awkwardly near the entrance, briefcase in hand, looking painfully out of place. he looked like someone who got lost on his way to a corporate halloween party. really, universe? did it have to be the middle-aged guy with the briefcase? you sighed and pulled up closer, rolling down your window. “jay?” you called out. he looked at you, utterly confused, his face blank like he had no idea what you were talking about. this can’t be him, right? “uh, mr. park sent me to show you around?” you added, trying to make sense of the situation. “i’m y/n—” before you could finish, a head popped into view at your window, making you jump in your seat, heart racing as your eyes snapped to the figure now crouched by your car. “looking for me?” and there he was—the real jay. fuck. tall, devastatingly handsome, wearing a suit so perfect you were pretty sure it cost more than your rent. his hair was slicked back, his jawline sharp enough to cut glass, and that smile—god, that smile—lit up his face like he knew exactly how good he looked. it took everything in you not to openly gawk at him. this guy wasn’t just hot—he was jaw-droppingly, heart-racing, take-your-breath-away kind of attractive. and just to top it off, he smelled incredible, like cedarwood, spice, and something else you couldn’t place but was definitely dangerous.
your heart raced, and it felt like you were back in high school, locking eyes with your crush for the first time. and the way he looked at you, all confidence and charm, didn’t fucking help. you swallow thickly as your brain short-circuited for a second. doing your best to mask the shock—and the blatant gawking—as you extended your hand to shake his. but then you realized, oh, right, he was crouched down, his face level with your car window, meaning there was no way he could actually reach you from there. he raised an eyebrow, amusement dancing in his eyes. “we doing handshakes from inside the car now?”
you felt your cheeks heat up slightly, embarrassed by how thrown off you were. “uh, no, i—” you pulled your hand back awkwardly, trying to regain your composure. “i just wasn’t expecting… well, you.” he grinned, clearly enjoying how flustered you were. “and what exactly were you expecting?” you gestured toward the poor guy standing a few feet behind him, still clutching his briefcase. “not… not you.” jay glanced over his shoulder at the guy, chuckling. “oh, him?” he laughed, the sound deep and smooth, sending a shiver down your spine. “nah, that’s the temp. he’s just helping out while i get settled.” right. of course. because why would the universe make this easy for you? he straightened up, giving you a full view of just how tall he really was. damn, the guy was built like a dream. he adjusted his suit jacket, flashing you another one of those infuriatingly perfect smiles. “so, you’re my guide for the day?” you nodded, finally getting a grip on yourself. “yeah, i’ll be showing you around, introducing you to the team, that sort of thing.” “sounds fun,” he replied, his eyes lingering on you a little longer than necessary. he stepped back from the car, giving you room to get out. you took a breath, trying to shake off the sudden nerves. he’s just a colleague, y/n. stop acting like you’re on a damn date. you got out of the car, smoothing your clothes down, doing your best to stay professional. but when you looked up again, jay was still watching you, his gaze following your movements a little too closely.
there was something about him that made it impossible to stay indifferent. confident, sure, but also playful in a way that got under your skin. like he knew exactly what he was doing. “lead the way, then,” he said with a nod toward the building. you nodded back, fighting off the flutter in your chest as you turned on your heel and headed toward the entrance. get it together, y/n. there were more important things to focus on—like how to warn jay about the office and your boss’s ridiculous expectations. the last thing you needed was a crush. especially on someone like him. as you made your way through the doors, you mentally prepared yourself for the day ahead. you needed to focus on work, not on how good jay looked in that suit or how his presence seemed to linger around you like gravity. jay fell into step beside you, casual and relaxed. “so, y/n,” he started, his voice smooth, “how bad is it working here?” you gave him a half-smile. “oh, you have no idea.” leading him through the maze of cubicles and conference rooms, it was impossible not to notice the way people stared at jay as you passed. it wasn’t just you—everyone noticed him. how could they not? jay didn’t just walk into a room, he commanded it. and the way he made small talk with your coworkers, that smile lighting up his face—it was like he had everyone hooked.
you gave him the usual tour: break room, copy room, the stash of good coffee you stole from your boss’s private stock, and the dreaded hr department, notorious for all the wrong reasons. jay nodded along, paying attention, but you could feel his eyes on you more often than not. by the time you made it to the lounge area, you were ready for a break, not because the tour was tiring, but because being around jay was exhausting in a whole other way. “this is where we hide when the boss is breathing down our necks,” you said, gesturing to the snack station. “snacks, coffee, all the essentials. we can take a break before i show you the rest.” jay chuckled, leaning against the counter with that annoyingly perfect posture. “i've gotta say, this place isn't so bad. you made it sound like a war zone.” you shrugged, reaching for a granola bar. “it’s not the place—it’s the people. management, especially. if you last a week, i’ll be impressed.” he raised an eyebrow, smirking. “that bad, huh?”
you tore open the wrapper, taking a bite. “you don’t know the half of it. the boss is a control freak, expects us to be mind readers.” jay laughed, grabbing a snack for himself, eyes still on you. “good thing i’m good at reading people then.” you felt your cheeks heat up slightly at the way his gaze lingered. yep, definitely flirting. “yeah? how’s that working out for you so far?” you shot back, trying to keep things light but he grinned, leaning a little closer. “i’d say i’m getting the hang of it.” what the hell, jay? maybe it was just you overthinking, but the way he keeps on leaning a closer? god, he needed to stop acting like he fucking wants you or you'd completely lose it. “so,” jay continued, unwrapping his snack, “what keeps someone like you in a place like this?” you laughed softly, leaning against the counter. “honestly? it pays the bills, and i haven’t found anything better yet. you learn how to survive.”
jay watched you for a moment, his gaze almost too intense. “maybe you just haven’t found the right opportunity to leave yet.” there was something in the way he said it, something that made you feel like he was offering more than just advice. “maybe,” you replied, trying to keep your voice steady, though your heart was hammering. jay smiled, taking a slow sip of his drink. “you’re not as uptight as you made yourself sound earlier. you’re pretty laid-back.” you laughed, though your stomach flipped at the unexpected compliment. laid-back? not the words jungwon would use to describe you this morning. “i’ll take that as a compliment,” you said, trying to sound casual. jay hummed, his eyes dipping down for a moment before flicking back up to meet yours. there was something almost deliberate in the way he took another slow sip of his drink, like he was savoring it. "it was meant as one. not everyone can pull that off."
jake’s voice from earlier played on a loop in your head: maybe he’s exactly what you need. goddammit, jake wasn’t wrong. the way jay moved, the way his words slipped out so easily, it was like he knew exactly how to push your buttons without even trying. but shit, this was work. you couldn’t lose your head over some pretty boy with a killer smile, no matter how damn good he smelled or how dangerously close he was standing. you took a deep breath, trying to calm the pulse racing in your throat. still, your mouth betrayed you. “you’re dangerous, you know that?” the words came out more playful than you intended, a grin tugging at the corners of your lips despite yourself. jay’s smile widened at that, his eyes lighting up with mischief, the air around him practically buzzing. "i’ve been told." oh, fuck. and just like that, you were completely hooked.
as you closed the office door behind you, glancing at your wristwatch, you realized just how late it had gotten. your heels were killing you, and all you could think about was kicking them off the second you got home. jay walked beside you, his long strides effortlessly keeping pace as you both headed to the parking lot, still chatting about schedules and the mountain of upcoming projects. "so," you said, rubbing your temples, "looks like we’ll be working pretty closely on that new marketing push. i’ll show you the ropes, make sure you don’t drown in all the corporate bullshit." "sounds like i’m in good hands, then." his eyes crinkled at the corners when he smiled, making it impossible not to return the gesture. as you continued walking, the conversation shifted, and jay started opening up more—talking about where he came from. and fuck, was that a surprise. the guy was loaded. not just rich—serious money. the kind that makes you wonder why someone like him would even bother working in a place like this. "so," you said, still trying to process it, "you could probably be running a company by now, right? why take a job here?" jay shrugged, all humble and casual, like it wasn’t a big deal. "i wanted to start from the bottom, you know? understand the employees, the management... see how everything works before i think about building something of my own." you blinked at him, genuinely impressed. who the hell chooses to start from the bottom when they’re sitting on a pile of money? "that’s… honestly, that’s really smart. most people wouldn’t do that." "thanks," he said, smiling warmly. "i like to think i’m in the right place for now." there it was again—that easy charm. it wasn’t just the flirting; it was how natural everything felt with him. the way the conversation flowed effortlessly, like you’d known him forever. and it wasn’t just nice—it was fucking refreshing to talk to someone who didn’t make everything feel like a power play. you glanced at your phone, then cursed under your breath. shit, jungwon. you’d been so wrapped up in the day that you forgot about dinner. and knowing him, he probably hadn’t eaten anything decent since breakfast.
"ugh," you groaned, rubbing your forehead. "i totally forgot, i’ve got a brother to feed." jay raised an eyebrow, a teasing smirk playing on his lips. "younger brother?" you rolled your eyes, half-laughing. "i wish. that would be way easier. no, he’s grown—just incredibly lazy." jay chuckled, shaking his head. "sounds like a handful." "you have no idea," you replied, smirking. "but someone’s gotta take care of him." you both shared a laugh, the walk settling into an easy rhythm again as you made it to your cars. jay leaned against his door, his eyes lingering on you in a way that was... not subtle. there was something magnetic about him, and as much as you tried to keep your cool, it was becoming harder by the second. "well," jay said, pulling his phone from his pocket, "this was easily one of the best tours i’ve ever been on. we should do it again sometime." he flashed that devastating smile, his eyes flicking back up to yours as he scrolled casually on his screen. "can i get your number? you know, in case i get lost tomorrow and need rescuing." god, he’s good. you couldn’t help but laugh, pulling out your phone to exchange numbers with him. "sure. just don’t make a habit of getting lost, though."
he chuckled, tucking his phone away, his gaze still locked on you. "i’ll try my best. thanks for showing me around, y/n." "anytime," you said, feeling lighter as you waved goodbye and headed toward your car. halfway home, you caught yourself still smiling like a fucking idiot. by the time you finally walked through the door of your apartment, juggling bags of jungwon's favorite takeout, you were greeted by the usual sight of jungwon sprawled out on the couch, xbox controller in hand. he glanced up, his eyes immediately landing on the food you were carrying, eyebrows raised. "what’s the occasion?" he asked, eyeing the bags suspiciously. "you only ever get me this when something really good happens." you grinned, setting the food on the table, still riding the high from earlier. "oh, you know... just had a great day at work." jungwon’s eyes narrowed a little, his suspicion deepening. "a great day, huh?" "yup," you said, kicking off your heels and digging into the food. "jay." jungwon leaned back on the couch, trying to look indifferent. "and?"
you let out a dreamy sigh, not even noticing how his eyes sharpened slightly. "he’s amazing. like, seriously. smart, loaded, and so humble. it’s crazy. oh, and did i mention he’s hot? like, really fucking hot." jungwon kept his face neutral, but there was a flicker of something—something dark that you didn’t catch. "sounds... great." you continued gushing, going on about how well you and jay clicked, the subtle flirting, the easy chemistry. "and the best part? we’re gonna be working on a bunch of projects together. i think we’re gonna make a really good team." jungwon stayed quiet, his gaze fixed on the food in front of him. "yeah, well," he finally muttered, his tone clipped, "just don’t get distracted." you paused, mid-bite, raising an eyebrow. "distracted?" jungwon shrugged, his eyes flicking up for the briefest moment before going back to his food. "just saying. you’ve got a lot on your plate already." "i can handle it," you replied, brushing off his comment, "besides, it’s not like anything’s going to happen." but even you didn’t believe that. something’s definitely going to happen. you could feel it. jungwon didn’t respond, just grunted and focused back on the tv, clearly not wanting to continue the conversation. you shrugged it off, too caught up in the day to care.
as you sat on the couch next to him, scrolling through your phone, a familiar ping made you glance down at your screen. a message from jay. instinctively, a smile tugged at your lips, and without thinking, you bit your lip as you read it. jay: hope you’re not too tired from babysitting me all day. thanks again for the tour. promise i won’t get lost tomorrow... but i might just text you anyway ;) goddamn, he was smooth. your smile widened, and before you knew it, you were already typing back. y/n: i’ll be holding you to that ;) don’t leave me hanging. you hit send, feeling a flutter in your chest as you tossed your phone onto the couch. you were smiling like a fucking teenager, and you knew it. but you didn’t care. jungwon, sitting beside you, glanced over. his eyes darted to your phone, then back to your face. "who’s that?" he asked. you shrugged, trying to play it off. "just jay. he’s funny."
jungwon hummed, eyes glued to the tv again, though you could see the way his jaw clenched. "funny, huh?" "yeah, we were just texting about today. nothing big." jungwon stayed silent after that, but you could feel the shift in the air. something was off. maybe it was the way he bristled every time you mentioned jay, or maybe it was how quiet he’d gotten all of a sudden. you brushed it off, your mind too busy replaying your day with jay. but if you had looked up, if you had paid attention, you would’ve seen the way jungwon was staring at you now—intense, almost predatory. his eyes weren’t on the tv anymore. they were fixed on you. and the way you smiled down at your phone, completely unaware, only seemed to fuel something deeper inside him. he didn't even blink. his expression was unreadable, but his gaze... it was burning. if only you had noticed. but you didn’t. you were too busy with jay, too caught up in the thrill of it all to feel the weight of jungwon’s stare.
a week had passed since then, and jungwon sat on the couch, leg bouncing restlessly, his eyes on the tv but not actually seeing anything. sunghoon and jake’s laughter filled the room, their voices like nails on a chalkboard as they kept making casual comments about you and jay. every joke, every stupid jab about how much jay liked you felt like a fucking knife twisting deeper in his chest. fuck, this is hell. he couldn’t take it. "bet jay’s got it bad for her," sunghoon’s voice cut through the air, making jungwon’s stomach twist, his blood boiling under his skin. his heart pounded in his ears, drowning out everything else. all he could focus on was the heat rising in his chest, the way his skin felt too tight. he swallowed hard, trying to keep the rage from spilling out. “i’m going to the bathroom,” he muttered, standing up so fast the remote slipped from his hand and hit the floor with a thud. jake and sunghoon glanced up, surprised, but jungwon didn’t wait for a response. he stormed down the hallway, steps uneven, barely holding it together. when he reached the bathroom, he slammed the door hard enough to echo through the apartment. let them think he needed to cool off or whatever. but the bathroom wasn’t where he was headed. you were still at work. probably with jay. fucking jay. probably talking, laughing, maybe even flirting with him. jungwon’s chest tightened at the thought, his jealousy clawing at him. he couldn’t handle it. he needed a release, needed something to calm the fire burning inside him. so he went to your room.
his hand shook as he reached for the knob, pausing for a second to listen. jake and sunghoon were still laughing, still talking like nothing was wrong. he slipped into your room, closing the door quietly behind him. the second he stepped inside, your scent hit him—sweet, familiar, fucking intoxicating. it wrapped around him, choking him in the best and worst way possible. his chest ached, and for a second, he thought he might actually break. he leaned back against the door, sliding down to the floor, his head falling into his hands. he felt like he was losing his fucking mind. you. it was always you. his heart pounded painfully, each beat a reminder of how fucked up he felt. he could barely breathe, barely think, and yet, the need to be in here—in your space—overpowered everything else. the room was exactly how you left it—clothes scattered across the bed, your hoodie tossed over the chair. but jungwon’s eyes went straight to the shelf facing your bed. that fucking teddy bear.
it wasn’t small either—one of those carnival bears he’d won for you back then. it wasn’t huge, not one of those obnoxiously oversized ones, but big enough. bigger than a normal stuffed animal, definitely enough for you to… do what you did with it. it sat there, innocent to anyone else, untouched, like it hadn’t been moved in months. for anyone else, it was a forgotten toy, frozen in time. but to him? it was everything. it was the key to his obsession. he reached for it, his fingers brushing over the soft fur, his stomach twisting with a mix of guilt and desire. he sat on the edge of your bed, gripping the bear like it was the only thing keeping him sane. how the fuck did it get this bad? he hadn’t meant for things to spiral out of control, but now? now he was too far gone. for a moment, he just sat there, staring at the bear, knowing what he had hidden inside it. knowing the guilt that came with it. it wasn’t just a toy anymore. it was a reminder—of what he was, of everything he had become.
his fingers tightened around 'teddy' as memories hit him, one after the other, like a train barreling through his mind. pulling him deeper into the past. he could never forget that summer, the one after his first year of college. he had come back home, exhausted but fucking relieved to finally get a break from the chaos of school. the months away had been a blur, and honestly? he didn’t think much about you during all that time. you were just his stepsister—at least, that’s the bullshit he kept telling himself. he buried the memories of your pretty smile he grew fond of and how it made him feel, shoved them down deep, thinking that the distance would fix it, that it would kill whatever twisted thing was starting to grow inside him. maybe if he just stayed away long enough, it’d disappear. but when he came back that summer, everything shifted. again. he should’ve walked away, should’ve ignored it. but curiosity clawed at him, dragged him closer, until he was standing in the doorway, peeking inside. and what he saw? it fucked him up.
his breath hitched, heart slamming in his chest, pulse fucking skyrocketing as his eyes locked onto you. holy shit. you were on your bed, but it wasn’t just the sight of you lying there that stopped him cold. no, it was what you were doing. his stomach twisted as he realized what was happening—you were straddling the teddy bear. that bear. the one he’d won for you years ago. but this? this wasn’t innocent, not in the way you used to cuddle it when you were younger. this was different. this was fucking worse. you were grinding your pussy against it, hips rolling in slow, deliberate circles. his breath hitched, his heart slamming in his chest as he watched you, lost in your own pleasure, completely unaware that he was watching. you were wearing nothing but an oversized shirt, the way your pussy rubbed against the soft fabric of the bear, slick and wet. the obscene sounds it made as you humped it—it was like watching some twisted fantasy come to life. except this was real. you were real. and you were right in front of him. you weren’t just humping it. you were fucking it, using it like it was the only thing that could get you off.
jesus fucking christ. his mind screamed at him to look away, to shut the door, to fucking forget this. but his body didn’t listen. eyes glued to you as you rocked your hips faster, he couldn’t stop watching the way your pussy moved, the way you were so lost in it. his throat went dry, hands shaking as he gripped the doorframe. he knew this was wrong. so fucking wrong. but he couldn’t stop. couldn’t fucking stop watching the way your hips moved, the way you were so lost in it. that darkness—the one he thought he had buried—was creeping back in, stronger than ever, twisting his insides, making his cock swell painfully in his pants. fuck. this wasn’t curiosity anymore. this was darker. more dangerous. you weren’t just the awkward teenager he once knew. you were a woman now—a fucking gorgeous woman—and you were doing things that set every buried desire inside him on fire. your movements grew more desperate, hips grinding harder, your hands gripping the bear’s fur tight as you moaned louder, your jaw going slack. jungwon’s chest heaved, his breath shallow as he watched, his own arousal throbbing, making it impossible to think straight.
shit. this wasn’t supposed to happen. he wasn’t supposed to feel like this. not for you. but no matter how hard he fought it, he couldn’t tear his eyes away. jungwon’s mind was a whirlwind of guilt, shame, and overwhelming fucking lust. his cock strained in his pants, rock hard, body betraying him in the worst fucking way possible. he could barely breathe, barely fucking think. all he could do was watch as you came undone on that bear. he had tried to convince himself that going to college would kill this twisted attraction, that the distance would erase it. but standing there, watching you, he knew he was wrong. so fucking wrong. the obsession hadn’t disappeared. it had grown. it had festered and that night? it reignited something in him that he couldn’t control. from that night on, he was no longer the same. he couldn’t stop thinking about you. couldn’t get the image of you humping that bear out of his head. the sound of your moans, the sight of your pussy grinding against that fabric—it haunted him. consumed him. and he knew, watching from a distance wasn’t going to cut it anymore. that’s when the plan started. it didn’t take much. just a little manipulation, some subtle planning. you never noticed. you never did. the bear—the one you fucked so carelessly—became the perfect vessel for his sick curiosity.
he made a small incision in the back, right beneath the soft fur, where it wouldn’t be visible. he slid a tiny camera inside, adjusting the angle, hiding the lens so perfectly behind it's eyes, you would never know. you never did. and from that day forward, he watched you like he was fucking studying you. memorizing every detail. he knew what turned you on, what porn you watched when you thought you were alone, which boyfriends made you scream, which ones you hated and which ones left you wanting more. he saw and heard it all. every. single. moment. this wasn’t some passive hobby anymore. no, everything jungwon did was calculated. planned to perfection. he made sure he was always home, always there, watching. he never left anything to chance. he didn’t even look for a job—couldn’t risk being away for too long. he needed to be there, needed to make sure the camera was charged, that he didn’t miss a single second of you. he told himself it wasn’t obsession, that it was just curiosity. but deep down, he fucking knew better. this was something twisted. and jungwon had built his entire world around you without you ever realizing. he controlled everything. and no one—not even you—would ever figure it out. while you lived your life, thinking everything was normal, jungwon’s mind was always ten steps ahead, planning, thinking. how could he keep you in his grasp without you knowing?
and for years, it worked. you never noticed how he made sure to align his life with yours. how his schedule revolved around you. he made it look natural, casual, like he was just the laid-back stepbrother who didn’t care about shit. but the truth? it was so much darker than that. he knew everything. he snapped out of his memories, his eyes locking onto the bear again. that moment, that fucking night. it haunted him. the memory burned into his mind, twisting his insides like a sickness he couldn’t cure. he stood up, legs shaky, the room suddenly feeling too small, too suffocating. it had all started so small, hadn’t it? he had convinced himself it was innocent. just a way to keep an eye on you, make sure you were safe. that’s what he told himself when he planted the camera in the bear. back when he thought his feelings were still manageable. but that lie had crumbled a long time ago. now, he needed to be close to you in ways that twisted his stomach and filled him with guilt so deep it kept him up at night. jungwon carefully placed the camera back inside the bear, adjusting it until it was in the perfect position. his hands were steady, but inside, he was falling apart. he zipped it up, placing the bear back on the shelf, just like always. no matter how sick it made him, no matter how much he hated himself for this, he couldn’t stop. he needed this. he needed you in ways that fucking terrified him. your room—it was his sanctuary when you weren’t home. the one place he could feel close to you without the crushing weight of being caught. in here, he could pretend, just for a second, that he had a part of you that no one else could touch.
it was so fucked up, and he knew it. but it was like an addiction, a need he couldn’t fucking shake. the guilt gnawed at him, but the need was stronger.
his heart twisted as his mind drifted back to you and jay. what were you two doing right now? the thought of jay touching you, making you laugh, getting close to you in ways jungwon never could—it made him feel like he was going to fucking explode.
you’re just his stepsister. he repeated the thought like a mantra, but the words were hollow, meaningless. that’s what you were supposed to be. that was the role he was supposed to play. jungwon’s mind spiraled, pacing back and forth in your room, his footsteps soft but frantic. it was only a matter of time before jay would be here, touching you, fucking you. and what the fuck was he supposed to do then? sit by and watch through the hidden camera? watch you fall and get fucked by someone else again? probably. fuck. he needed to leave. if he stayed in here any longer, he didn’t know what he’d do. the temptation was already clawing at him, the urge to take something of yours, to steal a piece of you like he had done before. your panties, your scent—he’d stolen them, hid them away like trophies, jerked off to them countless times. but even that wasn’t enough anymore. not now. not with jay in the picture. jay was a fucking threat. jungwon couldn’t stand it, the way you smiled when you talked about him, how your face lit up when you mentioned his name. fuck that. jay was pulling you into a world where jungwon didn’t belong, where he couldn’t follow, and that scared the shit out of him. he was losing control, and it was driving him insane.
the watching, the sneaking, the careful fucking planning—it wasn’t enough anymore. it wasn’t keeping you close. you were slipping through his fingers, the thought of jay taking what was his, getting close to you in ways jungwon could never—fuck, it made him sick. he shot one last look at the bear, the silent witness to his obsession, then stormed out of your room, closing the door behind him with a soft click. his breath was ragged, chest heaving as he leaned against the wall in the hallway. his heart pounded in his chest, a constant reminder of just how fucked up this had become. he couldn’t keep living like this. the watching, the waiting, pretending it would all go away—that was bullshit, and he knew it. this obsession wasn’t something he could just bury anymore. it was eating him alive. one day, watching wouldn’t be enough. the waiting, the creeping around behind your back—it wouldn’t satisfy the darkness inside him. he wanted more. he needed more. and that day was coming sooner than he’d like to admit. jungwon pushed himself off the wall, his legs shaky, mind racing, but even as he stormed down the hall, his thoughts were a jumbled mess, each one more fucked than the last. you were his. you didn’t know it yet, but you were.
jungwon reentered the living room, his footsteps heavier than usual, the weight of the shit storm in his head pulling him down with every step. he tried to shake it off, tried to act normal, but it was like a fucking itch he couldn’t scratch. jake and sunghoon were still slouched on the couch, laughing at some inside joke, barely giving a shit about the movie playing in the background. jungwon forced a grin, slipping into the scene like nothing was wrong. like he wasn’t on the verge of snapping. “what do you think, jungwon?” sunghoon’s voice had that edge to it, like he knew exactly what buttons to push. he always did. “you think jay’s the type to take her home, make breakfast the next morning? maybe throw in some flowers too?”
of course, they were still fucking talking about you. they just couldn't help themselves. jungwon’s chest tightened, but he let out a forced laugh, “yeah, he seems like that kind of guy from what she tells me. real gentleman.” the words felt like they were choking him. he could barely get them out. jake snickered, shaking his head like it was all a fucking joke. “well, at least she picked a decent guy this time.” jungwon’s fingers twitched, every part of him screaming to shut this conversation down, but sunghoon leaned back, smirking like the asshole he was. “please. nice guys like jay? they’re hiding something. i bet he’s got some skeletons in the closet.” jungwon clenched his jaw, forcing himself to breathe. “let her have her fun,” he muttered, his voice tight. “she’ll tell us all about it when she gets back.” his throat burned. “anyway,” he cleared his throat, trying to sound disinterested, like the image of you and jay wasn’t tearing him apart, “fuck this, this movie’s boring as hell.” he grabbed the remote, flipping through channels without even paying attention, just needing something—anything—to drown out the thoughts in his head.
jake and sunghoon didn’t argue, their attention shifting to the tv. but jungwon wasn’t watching. he couldn’t. his mind was far from the room, far from the flashing screen in front of him. his fingers tightened around the remote, knuckles going white, but he didn’t even notice. he hated jay. hated him with every fiber of his being. not because jay was bad. no, that would’ve been easier to deal with. jay wasn’t bad. jay was good. too fucking good. the kind of guy who could give you everything, who’d make you feel safe, who’d make you happy in ways jungwon knew he never could. jungwon hadn’t met him yet, didn’t need to. the way you looked when you talked about him, the way your eyes lit up—that told him everything. jay wasn’t just some guy. he was the kind of threat that jungwon couldn’t fight with fists or anger. jay was the real fucking deal. and if it came down to it—if it came down to losing you completely? jungwon didn’t give a shit about jay. fuck jay. he’d do whatever it fucking took to keep you his.
jungwon had changed, and jake and sunghoon noticed. how could they not? he was more agitated, easily irritated, barely said a word. he wasn’t the jungwon they were used to—the one who laughed at their dumb jokes, who was always cheerful in his own quiet way. now, he was distant, like he had a constant storm brewing under the surface. and they tried asking him what the fuck was going on, throwing out questions like breadcrumbs, but they knew better than to push too hard. jungwon didn’t like to share shit, especially when it came to whatever was messing with his head. they tried though, casually bringing up the girl jungwon had been seeing. when they asked if it was about her, his response was clipped, a warning wrapped in frustration. “it’s not about her. drop it,” he snapped, and they did. they loved him enough to not push. instead, they did what they could. they showed up, more often than usual, hanging around the flat as much as possible. not enough to make it obvious that they were worried, but enough to remind him they were there. jungwon didn’t tell them to fuck off, which said a lot. normally, when jungwon was fine, he didn’t need their company—he’d barely ask for it. but now? he tolerated it, and that meant he needed them, even if he’d never admit it. the flat buzzed with the usual noise—jake and sunghoon arguing over takeout, the tv humming in the background—but jungwon felt none of it. all he could think about was you, and how the fuck you weren’t home yet. “die hard never gets old,” jake waved his pizza slice like it was some declaration worth fighting over. “perfect movie for a night like this." sunghoon rolled his eyes, slumping further into the couch. “bro, we’ve watched that shit like a hundred times. can we please pick something without bruce fucking willis?” jungwon’s grip tightened on the remote, fingers pressing way too hard into the buttons as he scrolled through movie options, but he wasn’t seeing any of it. his thoughts were on you, and where the hell you were.
“so, is y/n out with her new bestie jay again?” jake asked, grinning as he exaggerated the air quotes around bestie. “she’s been spending a lot of time with him lately, huh?” yeah, jungwon thought bitterly. too much fucking time. “probably,” jungwon muttered, his eyes glued to the tv, even though nothing on the screen registered. his jaw was tight, teeth clenched to the point it felt like one would crack. “they’ve been working on a lot of projects together.” “projects, huh?” sunghoon snorted, sarcasm dripping from every word. “sounds like he’s working on more than just projects.” jake laughed, nudging jungwon with his elbow like this was all one big fucking joke. “yeah, come on, man. you can’t tell me you haven’t noticed how close they’re getting.” jungwon wanted to punch the grin right off his face, but he forced out a dry, humorless laugh instead. “it’s just work,” he said, voice tight, strained, like he was choking on the words. “she’s focused on her career.”
he wanted them to shut the fuck up. every word out of their mouths felt like nails on a chalkboard, scraping against the frayed edges of his control. jake and sunghoon never knew when to quit, always teasing, always pushing. and the more they talked about you and jay, the darker his thoughts got. jake smirked, leaning back like he wasn’t stirring shit. “focused on work? nah, she’s focused on him,” he teased, tossing his pizza crust aside. “i’ve seen the way she smiles when she talks about him. it’s different, bro. you can’t tell me you haven’t noticed.” of course, i’ve fucking noticed. jungwon thought, his insides twisting, but he couldn’t say that. couldn’t admit how much it was killing him. “she’s just happy, okay?” jungwon snapped, the words coming out sharper than he intended. his frustration bled through, cracking the mask he’d been holding up. as soon as the words were out, he regretted them. sunghoon raised an eyebrow at jungwon’s outburst. “damn, man, relax. we’re just messing with you.” jake and sunghoon exchanged a glance—one of those silent, knowing looks that meant they were both thinking the same thing. “dude, what the fuck is wrong with you?” jake finally asked, leaning forward on the couch, his eyes narrowing at jungwon. there was no bite in his tone, just concern. sunghoon, who had been lounging with his feet kicked up, straightened in his seat, nodding in agreement. “yeah, man. is something going on?” jungwon sighed, his grip on the remote loosening as he tried to shake off the weight sitting heavy on his chest. he didn’t want to talk about it—didn’t even know how to—but he could feel their eyes on him, waiting, and for once, he couldn’t just brush it off.
“nothing’s wrong,” he muttered, voice flat, forcing a smile that felt like it could crack his face. “just been tired, you know?” “bullshit,” jake said, calling him out instantly, his eyes narrowing further. “come on, don’t pull that tired card again. we’re not idiots. what’s really going on?” jungwon let out a long, shaky breath, trying to play it off, but it was like a dam about to break. his fingers ran through his hair, tugging slightly as he avoided their stares. “it’s nothing,” he repeated, quieter this time, trying to convince himself more than anyone else. and then sunghoon said it. the thing. “is this about jay?” it was like someone had punched him in the gut, knocking the air from his lungs. his jaw clenched so hard he thought it might snap. jake and sunghoon didn’t say anything for a moment, but that silence said everything.
jake and sunghoon exchanged another look, this time laced with humor—light, teasing. they understood what this was about, but in their usual fashion, they weren’t about to get too serious. “so... you’re jealous,” jake said, grinning like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “yeah,” sunghoon added, “you’re scared jay’s gonna steal her away from you.” jungwon’s lips twitched into a half-hearted smile despite himself. steal her away from me. they made it sound so simple, like it wasn’t this all-consuming thing eating at him day and night. but hearing it put like that, it almost made him feel better. “oh, please,” jake smirked, leaning back into the couch, “as if jay stands a chance when sunghoon and i are here.” sunghoon barked out a laugh, nodding. “exactly. y/n’s just wasting time with him until she realizes we’re the real deal.” “you’re both idiots,” he muttered, shaking his head, but there was a small, genuine smile pulling at his lips now. it wasn’t much, but it was enough to ground him. “so?” jake started, his grin widening, “you want us to sweep y/n off her feet? we could totally make it happen. bet she’d love to be spoiled by us.”
jungwon’s expression darkened for a second, but he played it off with a smirk. hiding how much it really fucked him up inside. “yeah? go ahead. i’d rather you two fuck her than let jay get his hands on her.” the room fell into dead silence. jake and sunghoon both froze, staring at jungwon like he’d just said the most unhinged shit they’d ever heard. their eyes went wide, exchanging glances like they weren’t sure if he was fucking serious or just fucking around. “what the fuck, dude?” jake raised an eyebrow, laughing awkwardly but still trying to figure out if jungwon was for real. “you can’t be serious.”
sunghoon looked just as thrown off, his brows furrowing like he wasn’t sure what to make of the whole situation. “yeah, man, that’s... kind of fucked up.” jungwon just chuckled lowly, leaning back against the couch, acting like it didn’t bother him. “what? you guys haven’t thought about it? with all the shit you say about her?” his eyes flicked between them, sharp, like he was daring them to admit something. jake and sunghoon shifted, clearly uncomfortable, glancing at each other for a second too long. and that was all jungwon needed to know. “come on,” jungwon pressed, narrowing his eyes, “you’re telling me you’ve never thought about fucking her?” sunghoon cleared his throat, his eyes darting away, and jake rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly looking anywhere but at jungwon. “well, i mean... we’ve joked about it,” jake finally muttered, trying to play it off like it wasn’t a big deal, “but we never... you know, took it seriously. she’s your sister, dude.” jungwon laughed, but there was no humor in it. “right.” “yeah, we never actually meant we’d... you know,” sunghoon added, looking like he wanted to crawl out of his own skin.
jungwon’s smirk stayed plastered on his face, but his eyes were dark, and they both knew they’d crossed into territory that felt too fucking dangerous. but jungwon couldn’t stop pushing it. he needed them to feel as fucking uncomfortable as he did. maybe then they'd keep their mouths shut, and for the love of god try not to mention jay. “relax,” he muttered, leaning back again, trying to appear calm. “i know you’re just talk. probably couldn’t handle her anyway.” jake forced a laugh, trying to lighten the mood, but it came out shaky. “yeah, well, maybe she’d eat us alive. guess we’ll never know.”
“yeah,” sunghoon chimed in, trying to keep things from spiraling further, “we’ll leave y/n to the real men, huh?” he gave his friends a half-hearted grin, pretending like their banter had actually lifted his mood. but as the conversation moved on, their laughter filling the room, jungwon stayed silent, his mind spiraling back to the same thought that had been plaguing him for weeks. he just wanted you home. and no amount of jokes or cocky smiles could change that. as he stared at the TV, barely registering the movie playing in front of him, he missed the quick look between jake and sunghoon—a brief exchange of glances, almost like a shared secret. it went unnoticed by jungwon, buried beneath his own frustration, his jealousy too loud to hear anything else.
the frustration still buzzed under your skin as you leaned against jay’s car, the harsh fluorescent lights in the parking lot flickering overhead like they were mocking your mood. today had been a fucking disaster, all because your boss had to lose his shit over something as stupid as a font. “can you believe that prick?” you huffed, running your fingers through your hair, still feeling the burn of irritation. “who the fuck cares about a font?” jay chuckled, but you caught the edge in his eyes, the same frustration simmering beneath that calm, easygoing mask he always wore. “yeah, the man’s got a real talent for missing the point,” he muttered, arms crossed, leaning back against his car like he wasn’t two seconds away from snapping himself.
he always had this way of looking like everything was under control, even when you both wanted to set the office on fire. “but fuck it, we crushed it. and honestly? he can go fuck himself.” you let out a sharp laugh, tension easing off your shoulders just a little. jay always had that effect, making the shittiest days feel like they weren’t so bad when he was around. and even though you could tell he was just as pissed, he never let it show. it was... comforting, somehow. god, he’s good, you thought, watching the way he managed to keep his cool when you were one bad comment away from throwing your laptop across the room. “you’re better than me,” you said, your voice softening without meaning to. “i would’ve lost it in there.” he shrugged, giving you a small, crooked smile. “just trying to keep the peace. doesn’t mean i’m not pissed.” his eyes flicked to yours, something darker in his gaze before he pushed off the car, a subtle shift in the air. you glanced at your watch, realizing how late it was. fuck. jungwon was probably at home by now, waiting for you. the thought brought a flicker of guilt to your chest, but before you could get too lost in it, jay’s voice cut through your thoughts. “hey,” he said, voice casual, but with an edge of something more. “wanna grab a drink? we deserve it after today.”
you blinked, a little caught off guard. “you sure? it’s late, and i didn’t peg you as the greasy takeout and beer type.” jay grinned, that playful spark lighting up his eyes. “who said anything about greasy? i know a spot. nothing too fancy, just... chill.” you raised a brow, skeptical. “knowing you, ‘chill’ could mean anything. i’m half-expecting a place that charges for air.” he laughed, leaning in slightly, his voice dropping a bit. “trust me. you’ll like it.” you hesitated for a second, but fuck it—you could use a drink. after the shitshow of a day you’d had, spending more time with jay wasn’t exactly a bad idea either. you slid into his car, the leather cool against your skin as you let out a tired sigh. jay kept things light, cracking jokes that had you laughing and forgetting why you were so pissed in the first place. he had that way about him, making everything feel easier, like nothing was a big deal when you were with him. when you pulled up to the restaurant, your jaw almost hit the floor. “chaconne?” you half-laughed, staring at the chandeliers, the valet parking, and people walking in wearing designer shit like it was a casual tuesday. “you said ‘pretty chill,’ not... this.” jay smirked, clearly enjoying your reaction. “it’s not that bad. come on.”
you smacked his arm lightly as you stepped out of the car, rolling your eyes. “i would’ve been fine with some dive bar and burgers, you know.” he laughed, guiding you inside. “yeah, but you deserve more than that. trust me.” and, there it was again—something about the way he said that, the way he looked at you. it wasn’t just friendly anymore. it felt... intentional. the second you stepped inside, the low hum of conversation and soft glow of chandeliers wrapped around you. this place was fancy, no doubt, and you felt a little out of place in your office attire. but jay? he looked like he belonged here, pulling out a chair for you with a smoothness that made your stomach flip. “this is too much,” you muttered, sitting down. “do they charge by chandelier?” jay chuckled, sitting across from you, and for a second, something in his eyes softened in a way that made your chest tighten. “seriously, stop. you deserve it. this is my treat.” you tried to shake off the warmth spreading through you, but it was hard to ignore. jay had always been sweet, always thoughtful, but tonight? there was something different in the way he looked at you. something heavier. the banter flowed easily as it always did, jokes and sarcasm bouncing between you two like normal, but every time his knee brushed yours under the table, whether it was on purpose or not, you felt it. every glance, every smile, felt like a little spark that you weren’t sure what to do with.
it wasn’t just the food or the wine—it was him. the way he leaned in just a little closer when he talked, this wasn’t the usual flirtation you were used to with him. this felt... deliberate. and as you sipped your wine, pretending not to notice the way jay’s eyes flicked down to your lips, you couldn’t help but wonder where the night was heading. “what?” you asked, catching him watching you again as you set your glass down, trying to keep your voice steady. jay leaned back in his chair, that familiar cocky smirk on his lips. “nothing,” he said, voice low, teasing. “just thinking... this might be the best idea i’ve had all week.” you raised an eyebrow, trying to ignore the way your heart skipped a beat. “taking me to an overpriced restaurant? yeah, real genius.” he chuckled, his eyes darkening just a little. “no... spending more time with you.” “are you flirting with me?” you teased, trying to keep it light, but your voice was softer now, your pulse picking up. jay’s lips twitched, and for a second, his eyes dropped to your lips again before snapping back up. “maybe i am.”
you swallowed, the tension between you both thick enough to cut. “and here i thought you were a gentleman,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper now. his smirk deepened. “i am,” he murmured, leaning in just a little more. “but you’re making it hard to stay one.” the heat in your chest spread lower, and you shifted in your seat, trying to stay composed. “well, then maybe you should stop teasing.” jay’s gaze flickered to your lips again, his voice dropping even lower. “maybe i don’t want to.” the conversation flowed easily all night, a smooth back-and-forth, laughter filling the space between you and jay as the wine worked its magic, loosening the edge that had been hanging over you both. you talked about everything—your turn-offs, shitty relationships, future plans—stuff you wouldn’t usually share with anyone. but with jay? it was easy. too easy.
“i was such a troublemaker back in the day,” jay confessed, laughing as he played with the rim of his wine glass, his fingers tapping lightly against the smooth surface. “got myself into some crazy shit before i finally realized i had to get my act together.” you leaned in, grinning at him, already intrigued. “oh yeah? what happened? what made jay park, the legend, finally decide to get his shit together?” he smirked, his eyes glinting with something darker, something playful as he met your gaze head-on. “had to step up. couldn’t be a a kid forever, right?” you cocked your head to the side, teasing. “so, what? you’re a responsible troublemaker now?” jay chuckled, fingers tracing the rim of his glass as his gaze lingered on you. “something like that.” you could feel the wine starting to hit, your cheeks flushed, your body a little warmer than before, and you knew he’d noticed too. his eyes kept flicking over your face, taking in the flush on your skin under the dim light of the restaurant, like he was seeing you differently tonight. “so,” you started, leaning forward just a little, a playful glint in your eye. “how much do you actually make, mr. responsible troublemaker?”
he didn’t answer right away, and you saw that smirk of his slowly curl back onto his lips. it was a power move, a playful one that had you shifting in your seat, wondering how long he was gonna drag this out. he finally looked up, tapping his finger against his chin, pretending to be deep in thought. “hmm, let me think…” you rolled your eyes, laughing lightly as you leaned back, trying to keep it casual. “come on, don’t edge me like that.” jay’s eyes flashed with something darker for just a split second, but he quickly covered it with a chuckle, raising an eyebrow at you. “edging you? didn’t know i was doing anything special.” the heat in your face rose, but you didn’t back down. the tension between you was thick, a game you weren’t sure you could win, but fuck it—you were in too deep now. “yeah, well, you’re doing a pretty good job of it,” you say suggestively. jay’s smirk widened, his gaze sharpening as he leaned forward, his elbows resting on the table. “am i now? didn’t realize you were so impatient.” you crossed your legs under the table, hoping he didn’t notice how tightly your thighs pressed together at his words, at the way your body was reacting to every little thing he was saying.
“i’m not impatient,” you replied, your voice a little breathier than you intended. “just curious. you’ve been holding out on me all night.” his gaze dropped to your lips for just a second, almost too fast to catch, but it was enough to send your stomach flipping. he leaned in closer, his voice dropping lower, his words wrapping around you like a caress. “maybe i’m just enjoying watching you squirm.” the way he looked at you—like he wanted to eat you alive, like he was holding back on purpose—it took everything in you not to lose your composure completely. “careful,” you murmured, your voice soft but laced with a challenge. “you might regret teasing me.” jay leaned back in his chair, still relaxed, still in control, but the air between you was charged, heavy with something neither of you could ignore. “i doubt i’d regret it,” he said, his smile too knowing, too cocky. “besides, you look good when you’re flustered.” you swallowed hard, trying to keep your cool, but the way his words slid into the space between you made it impossible to ignore the heat pooling low in your stomach.
he knew exactly what he was doing to you. “you’re trouble, park,” you muttered, though your words lacked any real bite. truth was, you didn’t want him to stop. not even close. jay grinned, his eyes glinting with that same playful, almost dangerous edge as he took another sip of his wine. “you have no idea.” jay was still being a gentleman—technically, he wasn’t crossing any lines—but the way he spoke to you, the way he looked at you, it was enough to leave your pussy throbbing under the table. by the time the night ended, and jay walked you out, his hand lightly resting on the small of your back, you couldn’t shake the feeling that something had shifted between you. and as you glanced up at him, catching the way his eyes lingered on yours, you knew you weren’t the only one feeling it.
you both stumbled up the stairs, giggles slipping out of you as jay’s hand stayed firmly on your back, warm and steady. no elevators, just endless steps, and the alcohol running through your veins made everything seem a little funnier than it should have been.
“god,” you slurred through your laughter, grabbing jay’s arm to steady yourself. “you’d think after living here for years, i’d be used to this.” jay chuckled despite the mess of the night. “you’ve survived this long. i think you’ll make it.” when your apartment finally came into view, you reached for your keys, but the loud shouts and bursts of laughter hit you first. you groaned, already knowing exactly who it was. “shit,” you sighed, leaning into jay with a grin that felt more playful than exasperated. “jake and sunghoon are here. they’re probably playing that stupid horror game again.” jay raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing on his lips. “you didn’t mention they’d be here.” you shrugged, pushing the door open a little. “they’re harmless. might as well introduce you before they scare you off.”
quietly, you pushed the door open, jay trailing behind. the scene inside was chaotic—snacks scattered, empty cans thrown all over the place, the three boys huddled around the screen, completely lost in the game. jake and sunghoon were yelling, clearly losing, while jungwon sat in the middle, eyes glued to the screen, fingers gripping the controller so tight his knuckles turned white. his jaw was locked, brows furrowed in concentration. but the second his eyes flicked over to you, his grip tightened even more, and his pulse quickened as he took in the sight of your flushed cheeks, the tipsy smile that played on your lips. you looked fucking gorgeous. “heyyy,” you giggled, stepping fully inside and waving dramatically at the guys. jake turned first, his grin wide and teasing as soon as he saw you. “oh, look who’s back,” jake said, leaning back against the couch, voice dripping with amusement. “knew you’d be tipsy by now.” sunghoon glanced over, laughing as well. “you look like you had one hell of a time.” you pushed the door open wider, and that’s when all their attention shifted to jay standing behind you. jungwon felt his stomach drop, a cold knot forming in his chest. he didn’t need you to introduce him. he knew exactly who this guy was. jay. with a smooth smile, jay raised a hand in greeting. “hey, nice to meet you guys.”
jake and sunghoon exchanged quick, surprised glances, their tipsy minds catching up slower than usual. but they jumped up to greet him anyway, stumbling over themselves. “hey, man!” jake practically shouted, extending his hand for a firm handshake. “nice to meet you.” sunghoon followed right after, shaking his head with a grin. “yeah, didn’t know y/n had friends outside of work,” he teased, shaking jay’s hand too. but jungwon? he was slower. more deliberate. his eyes stayed glued to you, even as he stood up, forcing himself to extend a hand to jay. his mind raced, trying to make sense of it all. this was the guy. “nice to finally meet you,” jungwon said, his voice tight, the grip of his handshake firmer than it needed to be. “she wouldn’t shut up about you.” there was a sharp edge to his words, but jay didn’t seem to catch it. he just laughed, throwing a glance in your direction. “oh yeah? she talks about me?” jungwon forced a smirk, one that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “yeah, mostly about how fucking loaded you are.”
your face flushed with embarrassment, and you quickly nudged jungwon’s side, laughing awkwardly. “he’s exaggerating,” you muttered. “i didn’t say that much.” jay chuckled, leaning in a little closer. “don’t worry. i’m flattered.” he was too smooth. way too smooth. and the way you lit up every time he spoke? it was obvious. jay really wasn’t just some guy. all the anxiety he felt, made sense. he wasn't overthinking it, he wasn't being paranoid. jay was a bigger problem than he thought. jungwon sat back down on the couch, fists clenched in his lap as jake and sunghoon dragged jay over, introducing him to the mess of their night. but jungwon couldn’t focus on their chatter, or the chaos of the room. all he could see was you. standing there, flushed, tipsy, looking too fucking good for your own good.
you sat beside jungwon, wrapping your arms around him in a playful hug like you always did. “this is jungwon,” you said, smiling up at him with that same affection. “my brother.” brother. right. jungwon forced a smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. if it were just the two of you, he’d be teasing you right now, making fun of how tipsy you were, how clingy you got when you were drunk. but with jay watching, he had to play it cool. had to pretend like everything was fine. “yeah,” jungwon said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “she talks about you all the time. couldn’t get her to shut up about how great you are.” jay smiled, unfazed, clearly amused by the whole thing. “well, i’ll take that as a compliment.” you groaned, swatting at jungwon’s arm. “why do you have to make it weird, won?” but jungwon barely heard you. his eyes were glued to you—the way your shirt had come undone, your hair a mess from the night out, your skirt riding up just a little too high. you looked like a fucking dream. and jay was seeing it, too. he could tell by the way jay’s eyes lingered on you, by the subtle shift in his smile.
jungwon’s fists tightened in his lap, and for a split second, he thought about saying something, anything to get you away from jay. but he didn’t. instead, he sat back, pretending like he didn’t care, like he always did. the conversation flowed around him, jake and sunghoon going back and forth with jay, throwing questions at him about work, life, plans—shit jungwon couldn’t give a fuck about. every now and then, he’d force himself to chime in, all for the sake of keeping up appearances. “so, jay,” jake asked, leaning in like they were old friends, a grin plastered across his face, “any big plans after this project with y/n?” jay shrugged, his eyes flicking toward you for a second, and the way his gaze softened made jungwon want to punch something. “we’ve got a few more campaigns lined up, keeping us busy, but we’re handling it. y/n’s been great to work with.” of course you’ve been great. “yeah, she’s an asset,” he muttered, the words sharp and bitter. you shot jay a warm smile, and the look in your eyes, that soft admiration, twisted the knife deeper. “he’s just being modest,” you said, your voice quiet but full of gratitude. “i’ve learned a lot from him.” jungwon couldn’t fucking stand it. the way you looked at jay like he hung the stars in the sky, like he was something special.
the conversation dragged on for a few more minutes, jay playing the perfect gentleman, but all jungwon could focus on was the way you seemed to gravitate toward him, like the room wasn’t big enough to keep the distance. then, you glanced at the clock, realizing how late it had gotten. “shit,” you muttered, standing up a little too quickly, swaying on your feet, tipsy from the wine. “i should probably go to bed.” jay was on his feet instantly, his hand on your arm, steadying you before you could even stumble. “you okay?” “yeah, just… tipsy,” you laughed, brushing it off like it was nothing. but jungwon saw it. the way jay looked at you, warm. protective. everything jungwon wanted to be for you. jungwon stayed silent as he watched you lean into jay, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. every time you smiled at him, every time you let yourself get a little too close, jungwon felt his patience wearing thin. “i’ll walk you to your room,” jay offered, his voice soft, like it was some grand fucking gesture. and you, tipsy and flustered, nodded, grateful.
jungwon didn’t say a word. he stood there, stiff, watching as you and jay made your way toward the hall. every part of him screamed to do something, to stop you, to pull you away from jay and tell you to stay. to tell you that it should’ve been him walking you to your room, not jay. but he didn’t. he just forced a small, tight smile, pretending like he wasn’t falling apart inside as he watched you leave with someone else. “she’s in good hands, man,” sunghoon said after a beat, breaking the silence, giving jungwon a look that was far too knowing for his liking. “jay seems solid.” “yeah,” jungwon muttered, his voice barely audible, barely able to form the words. “i’m sure she is.” but deep down, all he could think about was how badly he wished it was him. he wanted to be the one you trusted, the one you leaned on when you were tipsy and unsteady. the one you turned to when you needed someone. the one you chose.
as jay walked you down the hallway, his hand resting lightly on the small of your back, you could feel the warmth of his touch seeping through your skin, making your body hum under his fingers. everything around you feeling lighter, easier, thanks to the alcohol still buzzing in your system. “first time getting walked to my damn room,” you mumbled, a grin pulling at your lips. “so... proper.” jay chuckled, his voice low and smooth, sending a shiver down your spine. “someone’s gotta make sure you get there in one piece,” he teased, his hand lingering on your back, staying there a little longer than necessary. you rolled your eyes, stumbling slightly as you caught yourself with his help, feeling the heat rise in your cheeks. “oh, please. i’ve lived here forever. pretty sure i could find my way blindfolded.” jay smirked, steadying you with that familiar, calm touch, leaning in a little closer, his breath warm against your ear. “you sure about that? i'm pretty sure you almost face-planted into that wall.” you laughed, swatting at his chest, “okay, maybe i’m a little more drunk than i thought.” the laughter faded as you both reached your door, the air between you thickening, tension slowly building. jay’s hand slipped away from your back, but his eyes stayed glued to yours. he took a step back, just enough to let the moment breathe, but you could still feel him, that pull between you two impossible to ignore. “you good?” he asked softly, his voice losing some of the teasing, dropping into something more intimate, more real. you nodded, biting your lip as warmth spread through your chest, not just from the wine, but from the way he was looking at you. “yeah... thanks for tonight. i had a good time.”
jay smiled, his gaze flicking down to your lips for the briefest second before he met your eyes again. “me too,” he murmured, his voice low, like he was sharing a secret with you. “i’m glad we did this.” you swallowed, the weight of the moment settling in your chest, and then—your tipsy brain decided to cut through the tension. “okay, mister proper,” you teased, though your voice was a little more breathless than you intended, “this is where you leave me.” jay ran a hand through his hair, stepping back a little, but his eyes never left yours. “right. wouldn’t want to ruin my perfect gentleman streak.” you laughed, but the heat between you hadn’t gone anywhere. “goodnight, jay.” “goodnight, y/n,” he said softly, and with one last look, he turned and started walking down the hallway, leaving you standing there, heart still racing in your chest. you watched him go, and just as he reached the corner, something inside you stirred—nerves, excitement, you weren’t sure—but before you could stop yourself, you called out, “wait, jay?” he stopped, turning back to you, that easy smile tugging at his lips again. “yeah?” you hesitated, the wine still making you a little bolder than usual. “you’re not just leaving like that, are you?” jay raised an eyebrow, his smile turning more playful, more curious. “what, you miss me already?” you rolled your eyes, but the warmth in your chest only grew. “maybe,” you teased, leaning against the doorframe, trying to keep it light, “just wasn’t expecting you to... leave so fast.”
jay started making his way back toward you, his hands slipping into his pockets, his eyes locked on yours as he stopped just a few steps away. “well, you did say ‘goodnight,’” he pointed out, his smirk still there, confident and infuriating. you bit your lip, feeling a sudden wave of self-consciousness, but you pushed through it, “yeah, but i didn’t mean, like, leave-leave.” your voice trailed off slightly as you glanced down, heat rising in your cheeks. “i just... i really had fun tonight. thanks for... everything.” jay took another step closer, his voice dropping even lower, that same calm, comforting tone. “it was my pleasure. i had a great time too, y/n. honestly.” you looked up at him, and there it was again—that feeling. the butterflies in your stomach, the way he was standing so close that you could feel the warmth radiating off him. “so...” you started, your voice a little shaky, “i guess, uh... i’ll see you tomorrow?” jay inhaled deeply, his smile still there but a little more restrained. “yeah,” he said softly, “i’ll see you tomorrow.” for a second, you were sure he might lean in, that the night was about to take a different turn. but then jay stepped back, just enough to let the moment hang in the air, unresolved. “we’ll leave it at that... for now.” then, without another word, he turned, walking down the hallway with a quiet confidence that left you breathless. he didn’t look back, leaving you standing there, heart pounding, mind spinning. leave it at that, for now. the words replayed in your mind, a promise, a pause in the inevitable. it left you wondering—not if—but when something more might happen.
the sound of the front door closing echoed through the quiet apartment, sealing the night behind you. faint murmurs of jay saying his goodbyes to the boys lingered, but they felt distant, drowned out by the racing pulse in your chest. once you made it to your room, the door clicking shut behind you, you exhaled a long breath, one you hadn’t realized you’d been holding onto for so long. everything from the evening hung in the air—every glance, every word exchanged between you and jay, replaying in your mind like a highlight reel. “oh my god,” you muttered under your breath, feeling the heat rise to your face as a smile broke across your lips. and then, without warning, a giggle slipped out. you tried covering your mouth with your hands, but it was no use—the excitement bubbling up inside you couldn’t be contained.
before you knew it, another laugh escaped, louder this time, and suddenly you were bouncing on your bed, your body moving purely from the rush of joy flooding your veins. jay liked you. or at the very least, there was something there, something undeniable. the realization hit you all at once, and it sent another wave of excitement straight through you. you collapsed onto your bed, sinking into the pillows with a grin you couldn’t wipe away if you tried. “what the hell just happened?” you whispered, staring up at the ceiling, still in disbelief at how the night had played out. hugging a pillow to your chest, you giggled again, feeling the thrill of possibility wrapping around you like a blanket. everything about tonight felt different. special. like it was the start of something you weren’t ready to name, but you could feel it growing. rolling onto your side, you clutched the pillow tighter, another quiet laugh slipping out. “i can’t believe that just happened,” you mumbled, still grinning like you were in some sort of dream, your mind racing with the memory of jay’s lingering touches, the way he looked at you, the way his words felt like they held a secret just for you. as you lay there, thoughts kept drifting back to him—how easy it was being around him tonight, how much fun you had together, how different it felt from every other time you’d seen him at work. tonight was different, you could feel it. something between the two of you had changed, and you knew that tomorrow, things wouldn’t be the same.
jungwon sat slumped on the couch, his eyes glued to the tv, the images blurred together, meaningless noise in the background of his thoughts. jay had left a while ago, but the tension in jungwon’s chest hadn’t gone anywhere. he absentmindedly reached into a bag of stale chips, shoving another one in his mouth, but it tasted like cardboard. his mind was too busy replaying every interaction between you and jay, over and over, like some sick movie he couldn’t turn off. jake and sunghoon were still chatting, their voices fading as the night wore on. they’d been talking about marvel movies, but jungwon hadn’t really been listening. he felt like his brain was overheating. sunghoon stretched out lazily on the couch, his voice heavy with sleep. “so... jay. dude seems solid, huh? i don't think you should worry about y/n too much.” jake groaned, half-asleep already, tossing a pillow over his head. “he’s cool, but man, too tired for this shit. let’s talk tomorrow.” his words were muffled, barely coherent as he drifted closer to sleep. jungwon’s grip tightened on the chip bag, the plastic crinkling under his fingers. he wanted to tell them to shut the hell up, to stop talking about jay like it was no big deal. but he stayed quiet, shoving another tasteless chip in his mouth, chewing mechanically.
sunghoon, still awake, glanced over at jungwon with a lazy smirk. “but don’t you think it’s weird? like, he just shows up out of nowhere, and now he’s all over y/n?” the comment made jungwon’s stomach churn but he kept his mouth shut. he didn’t trust himself to speak without losing it. jake, half-conscious now, mumbled from under the pillow, “y/n’s a big girl. she knows what she’s doing. jay’s just a guy.” just a guy. jungwon swallowed the lump in his throat, forcing down the bile that was rising. he wanted to scream, to throw something, to do anything to stop feeling like this. “he’s not just some guy,” jungwon muttered under his breath, the words slipping out before he could stop them. he wasn’t even sure if sunghoon or jake had heard him. but sunghoon had. he turned his head slightly, raising an eyebrow at jungwon. “what was that?”
jungwon sighed, trying to play it off, forcing himself to sound casual. “nothing. just... hope he’s not wasting her time.” sunghoon yawned, stretching again, his eyelids heavy. “nah, y/n’s smart. she’ll figure it out.” jungwon glanced at jake, who had passed out completely, limbs sprawled out across the couch. sunghoon wasn’t far behind, his head nodding as sleep pulled him under. but jungwon couldn’t sleep. his mind wouldn’t shut off. with a deep sigh, jungwon stood up, tossing the half-empty chip bag onto the coffee table. the quiet hum of the fridge filled the flat as he made his way to the kitchen. he grabbed two beers, the cool metal of the cans grounding him, if only for a second. as he walked back toward his room, he passed by your door. he slowed down, his eyes lingering on it. were you still awake? were you thinking about jay right now? the thought made his chest tighten, but he forced himself to keep walking, pushing open the door to his own room. he dropped into his chair, cracking open the beer with a sharp hiss. he took a long swig, hoping the alcohol would numb the gnawing ache in his gut. he booted up his computer, needing a distraction, something to take his mind off everything. but the second the screen flickered to life, his stomach dropped.
there it was—the live feed from the camera he’d hidden in your room. his eyes locked onto the screen, guilt and shame flooding his body in an instant. but he doesn't look away. jungwon sat frozen, staring at the screen like it was some sort of punishment he couldn’t escape from. there you were, sitting on your bed, bathed in the soft glow of your bedside lamp, phone in hand, giggling quietly to yourself. you looked so fucking happy. too happy. your fingers moved quickly over the phone, typing, pausing now and then to laugh softly, lips curling into that familiar smile. the smile he knew wasn’t for him. jungwon took another long swig of his beer, trying to drown out the jealousy gnawing at him, but like everything else, it didn’t help. nothing ever did. he set the beer down, fingers curling into tight fists as he watched you. part of him wanted to slam the laptop shut but he needed to know who you were texting, though he could already guess it by now. his breath caught as you suddenly sat up, that same damn smile spreading across your face. the eagerness in your movements sent a wave of dread crashing over him.
what the fuck was happening? you stood in front of your mirror, fixing your hair, smoothing out your clothes. jungwon watched you, his grip on the mouse tightening. you hadn’t even been home an hour and you were already getting ready to talk to jay again? seriously? it was hard enough seeing you with jay earlier, but now—now you were about to do a video call, giggling like some lovesick teenager. you glanced at your phone, then plopped back onto your bed, adjusting yourself, fluffing your hair, making sure everything was just right. jungwon’s heart sank. he knew that look all too well. it was all for jay. he couldn’t tear his eyes away, watching as you picked up your phone again, smiling at whatever message popped up on the screen. then, through the speakers, he heard it—your voice. "miss me already?" you said, laughter filled the room, and jungwon felt his chest tighten.
of course. the beer can in his hand crumpled slightly under the pressure of his grip, but he didn’t care. every muscle in his body was wound tight, ready to snap. he listened, jaw clenched, as jay’s voice crackled through the speakers, muffled but clear enough to set jungwon’s blood boiling. “just got home,” jay’s voice said, casual, like none of this was fucking with jungwon’s head. “first time on a video call, huh? can’t believe we’ve never done this before.” your eyes sparkled as you tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, settling into the bed, completely unaware of the storm brewing in the next room. “yeah, kinda weird but fun,” you replied, your voice light, carefree. “guess there’s a first for everything.” the conversation between you and jay flowed easily, his voice seeping through the speakers like poison as you both planned to meet up again. jungwon could barely breathe as he listened to you suggest the weekend. “maybe we can do something... just us,” jay’s voice came through, warm and smooth.
just us. jay wasn’t just a passing interest. he was already staking his claim, like jungwon didn’t even exist. then you teased, your voice dropping to a playful tone, the kind you only used when you were comfortable with someone. “is it the alcohol, or are you actually obsessed with me, jay?” jay chuckled, his voice lower now, raspier. probably from exhaustion, probably because he was thinking about you. “oh, you caught me. totally obsessed. can’t stop thinking about you.” you bit your lip, a small smile playing on your lips. fuck, you were glowing. you were eating this shit up. “well, you do seem to be sticking around,” you teased, enjoying every second of it. jungwon’s stomach churned. he could see it all over your face—how much you were enjoying this. how much jay was getting under your skin, in ways that no one else ever had. then, you took it further. “if i’m so special, you’d break your gentlemanly streak.” jungwon could hear the playful edge in jay’s voice as he responded. “is this why you called? you wanted me to stay over, didn’t you?” your laugh was soft, but jungwon could see the way you bit your lip, see how flustered you were getting. “i don’t know. you tell me.” jungwon’s fist slammed down on the desk before he even realized it, the sharp thud breaking the moment. his entire body shook with the effort of holding back, his chest heaving as anger twisted inside him. the beer can crumpled completely in his hand, but he didn’t care. his focus was on you—on what was happening right in front of him.
this was worse than anything. worse than any of your exes. because with jay, it wasn’t just physical. jay was pulling you in, wrapping you around his fucking finger, and jungwon couldn’t do shit about it. your head snapped up at the sudden noise, your smile faltering as you glanced toward jungwon’s room. “what was that?” you asked, the unease creeping into your voice, pulling you out of the moment with jay. on the screen, jay raised an eyebrow, concern flickering in his eyes. “everything okay?” he asked, his voice soft, probing, like he could sense something was off. you forced a smile, waving it off, though the tension lingered in the air. “yeah, it’s fine,” you said, but the waver in your voice gave you away. you glanced back toward jungwon’s room, your brow furrowed. “i think it’s just jungwon.” jay’s concern deepened. “is he okay? maybe you should check on him.” you hesitated, torn between the conversation and the guilt tugging at you. was jungwon okay? the noise had been loud, and it wasn’t like him to react like that. what the hell was going on with him? you bit your lip, uncertainty creeping in. “he’s probably fine,” you muttered, trying to convince yourself as much as jay. “maybe he just dropped something.” but deep down, you weren’t sure. things had been off with jungwon lately—he’d been distant, quieter. and you had been caught up in other things, like work, like jay, barely noticing it.
jay’s voice cut through your thoughts. “are you sure? i don’t mind letting you go if you need to check on him.”
you shook your head, not wanting to break the mood between you two. “no, no... he’s probably just being his usual grumpy self.” but even as you said it, you couldn’t shake the unease. maybe jungwon was upset. maybe you had been neglecting him. you sighed, running a hand through your hair, wondering when things had gotten so complicated. “what’s wrong with him?” you muttered under your breath, glancing toward your door again. jay tried to lighten the mood, his voice warm. “he’s probably just jealous. i mean, if i had a sister like you, i’d be protective too.” you laughed, though it sounded hollow. “yeah, he’s always been that way,” you admitted, though the knot in your stomach didn’t loosen. jay’s gaze softened, concern and affection mixing in his expression. “seriously, though. if he’s upset, you should talk to him.” you nodded, knowing jay was right, but not wanting to deal with it right now. the conversation between you and jay had been going so well, and you weren’t ready to let it go yet. “sorry to cockblock you,” you muttered with a grin, trying to shift the mood back to playful. jay’s laughter was immediate, warm and infectious, shaking off some of the tension. “oh, come on,” he said, still chuckling. “don’t apologize. i’m just glad you still think i’m a gentleman after all this.” his laugh made you smile despite yourself, and for a moment, the unease faded. you joined in, teasing him right back. “well, i did just ruin the moment.” jay wiped away a fake tear, grinning. “trust me,” he said, voice still playful, “there’s no ruining anything with you.”
an idea hit you, your eyes lighting up with mischief as you giggled, grabbing your phone. excitement bubbled inside as you scrolled through your gallery, your finger hovering over a certain photo. the smile on your face faltered for just a second. it wasn’t exactly a nude, but the picture of you in your baby blue lingerie set? yeah, it was definitely provocative. jay’s brow shot up when he noticed the hesitation. “what are you up to?” he asked, the playful tone lingering in his voice, teasing, almost challenging. you grinned, your lip tugging between your teeth. “it’s an apology,” you teased, before hitting send. your heart raced as you waited, watching his phone buzz. anticipation prickled up your spine, making your stomach flip in that giddy way.
when jay opened the message, his reaction was instant. he sat up straighter, his lips parting, eyes widening as they scanned the image. the moment it clicked, his teeth sunk into his lower lip, and you heard the faintest groan escape him. fuck, he looked sexy like that. “well, damn,” jay muttered, his voice a bit lower, his gaze flicking back to yours. “kind of regret leaving so soon now.” a wave of warmth spread through you, making your pulse race. leaning closer to the screen, you bit your lip, “so, still gonna be a gentleman, or am i that special?” jay’s grin spread wider, amusement glinting in his darkened eyes. “depends,” he murmured, his voice smooth, inviting, “how special do you think you are?” your confidence surged, and you shot back without missing a beat. “oh, i’d say i’m worth bending the rules for.”
jay’s chuckle sent a shiver down your spine, his gaze flicking back to the photo. “if you keep talking like that,” he said, voice dropping, “i just might.”
you were about to push further, to see just how far he’d go with this, but then you heard it again—a sound from the other side of the wall. jungwon. again. jay noticed immediately, his playful demeanor shifting to something more concerned. “still think he’s okay?” he asked, his tone soft but pointed. you sighed, glancing at your door. “i don’t know... maybe i should check on him.” jay nodded, his expression softening. “yeah, probably a good idea. we can pick this up later.” he smirked, and there was a glint in his eyes, a promise in his voice. “but next time,” he paused, leaning closer to the camera, “wear that same set when i take you out.”
you laughed softly, warmth still lingering in your chest even after the call ended. the teasing excitement from jay stayed with you, but now, there was something else brewing. a sense of worry, creeping in at the edges. jungwon. you stood, giggling softly as the room tilted slightly. damn, you were more tipsy than you realized, and it took a second to steady yourself against the wall. jay kept you grounded, kept your focus on him like no one else could. but now, without him on the line, everything felt off, unsettled. maybe that’s just what he did to you—pulled all your attention in, made you forget everything else, even forget about how much you used to think about jungwon. and now, without him, everything was crashing back in. stumbling slightly, you sighed, feeling the weight of your concern. jungwon. something wasn’t right, not with the way he’d been acting, not with the thud from earlier echoing in your mind. you couldn’t ignore it anymore. pushing yourself forward, you headed down the hallway, your heart pounding in a way that had nothing to do with the wine or jay. what the hell is going on with him?
as you approached jungwon’s door, the sound of your familiar footsteps made his heart race. panic surged through him, adrenaline kicking in. he could hear your clumsy shuffle outside, but his mind was too clouded to focus—his eyes glued to the live feed still open on his screen. fuck. his fingers scrambled across the keyboard, minimizing the window in a flash. his screen flickered back to the innocent desktop wallpaper just as the door swung open. you stumbled in, nearly tripping over yourself, that tipsy smile lighting up your face. “hey,” you slurred, gaze locking onto him. jungwon sat there, stiff as a board, looking like a deer caught in headlights. you noticed the way his eyes darted toward the screen before meeting yours again. something was definitely off. “you good?” you asked, voice soft but with genuine concern, even through your drunk haze. there was something about his posture, the awkward stiffness that made you pause. his screen showed nothing out of the ordinary—just a plain wallpaper. but the way he looked at you, like he’d been caught red-handed, made your drunk mind spin. the realization hit you, and a teasing grin spread across your face. “oh…” you mumbled, eyes widening in mock surprise. “were you…?” you trailed off, giggling as the most obvious explanation popped into your head.
was jungwon watching porn? jungwon’s heart pounded harder, realizing what you were thinking. the teasing look in your eyes, the way you bit your lip to hold back laughter—it was clear you had jumped to a conclusion. and letting you believe that? yeah, way better than the truth. in a split second, he made the decision. “yeah,” he muttered, leaning back in his chair, trying to act casual. “caught me.” your eyes blinked in surprise, not expecting him to admit it so easily. the teasing grin faltered for a moment, but then you laughed, stumbling a bit as you waved your hands in a sloppy apology. “oh shit—sorry!” you giggled, your voice light as you tried not to laugh too hard. “didn’t mean to interrupt or anything.”
jungwon forced a smirk, his insides churning, but his face stayed calm. “it’s fine,” he shrugged, playing it cool, even though his mind was still racing. you leaned against the doorframe, your drunken smile wide as you eyed him. something about the way he was sitting there—too still, too stiff—made you pause. but your hazy mind couldn’t hold onto the thought for long, quickly getting distracted by the warmth in your body and the lightness in your head. “well, don’t work too hard, alright?” you teased, throwing him a playful wink. jungwon cleared his throat, fumbling over his words in a weak attempt to seem casual. “yeah, uh… i just hit my knee on the table earlier. nothing big.” it was a pathetic excuse, and he knew it. but you were drunk, too drunk to notice how thinly veiled the lie was. you giggled, brushing it off. “really?” you laughed, stepping closer to him, your eyes gleaming with curiosity. “sounds like you were watching something good.”
but something shifted in his expression—his eyes darkened, the atmosphere thickening around you. you froze for a second, your drunken confidence faltering as you stopped just short of getting too close. “why’re you so curious all of a sudden?” jungwon’s voice had dropped lower, more serious, almost challenging. “wanna know what i’m into?” the question hung in the air, heavier than it should have been. your breath hitched, the alcohol making it hard to process the meaning behind his words. and then it hit you. your heart raced as you blinked, caught off guard by the intensity in his gaze. “oh, come on,” you muttered nervously, laughing to shake off the tension. “don’t be weird. besides…” you trailed off, eyes sweeping over him in a way you hadn’t before, your tongue loose from the alcohol. “you’re already hot, you don’t need that stuff.” jungwon’s heart nearly stopped. hot? you’d called him hot? he stared at you, his brain short-circuiting, trying to process what you’d just said. he didn’t know how to respond, didn’t know what to do with the way his chest tightened at your casual compliment. you blinked, suddenly aware of what you’d let slip. “i mean—” you stammered, waving your hand as if to erase the awkwardness. “forget it. you should just get a girlfriend.” the words hit him harder than they should have. get a girlfriend. like it was that simple. like anyone could ever compare to you. his eyes lingered on you, the way your clothes were wrinkled from the day, how you stood there so oblivious to what you did to him.
how many times had he imagined you, like this, stumbling into his room, his bed, then fucking you in that exact outfit? he swallowed hard, the desire twisting painfully inside him as he forced a neutral expression. “yeah…” he mumbled, his voice barely steady. “maybe i should.” but you didn’t notice the turmoil behind his eyes. you were already pulling away, giggling softly as you pushed off the doorframe. “anyway, don’t stay up too late watching… whatever,” you teased, oblivious to the storm raging inside him. the door clicked shut behind you, and jungwon’s body slumped in his chair. his breath came out shaky, his chest tight with frustration. fuck, he wanted you. wanted you so bad it physically hurt. his eyes stayed glued to the door long after you’d left, the tension in his body refusing to dissipate. slowly, his gaze drifted back to the computer screen, his fingers twitching toward the mouse. the live feed was still there, minimized in the taskbar, waiting. he could feel the pull, the temptation to click it, to watch you again.
a frustrated groan slipped past his lips as he rubbed his face with both hands, trying to shake the need out of his head. you were so fucking clueless. so damn unaware of the effect you had on him, how deeply you’d burrowed yourself into his mind.
just as he thought he might get a grip on himself, he heard it—your voice, slurred and cheerful, calling out from down the hallway. “i love ya!” you sang, your words soaked in alcohol and affection. jungwon froze. his heart twisted painfully in his chest as he heard your drunken giggle follow, light and carefree—the kind of laugh that used to make him smile. now it felt like someone twisting the knife deeper. his hands pressed against his eyes, trying to block out the sound, trying to ignore the way your words lingered in his head. “i love ya!”—like it didn’t mean anything. like it was just something you threw around casually. he knew it was the alcohol talking, knew you didn’t mean it. not in the way he wanted you to. and that made it worse. that fucking shattered him.
jungwon shot up from his chair like a bullet, his heart hammering against his chest, the rage swallowing him whole. his body trembled, his hands clenched into fists so tight his knuckles turned white. he couldn’t sit still, couldn’t keep the frustration bottled up. pacing back and forth, his muscles burned, stretched to their limit as he swung his arms wildly, desperate for some kind of release. every breath was shallow, sharp, as if he was trying to breathe through the suffocating pressure building inside him. but nothing was working. without thinking, he grabbed the closest thing in reach—a small figurine on his desk—and hurled it against the wall with a guttural shout. the sound of it shattering into pieces, scattering across the floor, barely registered in his mind. it did nothing to ease the tension coiling tighter, suffocating him. it wasn’t enough. nothing was enough.
"fuck, fuck, fuck!" he snarled under his breath, dragging his hands through his hair, yanking hard at the strands in frustration. the sharp pain barely registered. his chest was heaving, the walls of his room closing in on him, making it harder to breathe. you were killing him. he couldn’t stop thinking about you—your stupid fucking smile, the way you looked at jay, the way you teased like you didn’t even realize what you were doing to him. it was eating him alive. the urge to check the live feed clawed at his mind, gnawing at his last shreds of self-control. his body practically collapsed back into the chair, hands shaking as his fingers hovered over the mouse, ready to click, ready to see you again. but he couldn’t do it. couldn’t give in. with a growl of frustration, he slammed his fist down on the desk, the sharp sting shooting through his knuckles barely enough to register. the pain was a welcome distraction from the ache burning inside him. “why the fuck did you say that?” he whispered, voice cracking with resentment. “you don’t mean it. you don’t fucking mean it.”
the words tasted bitter on his tongue as he stared at the empty desktop, his breathing uneven, his pulse pounding in his ears. you’d called him hot like it was nothing, like it was just a throwaway comment, and yet, here he was—burning from the inside out, unraveling because of you. how many times had you stood in front of him, drunk and completely clueless, without realizing just how deeply you’d twisted him up inside? it was like you enjoyed torturing him, like you knew he was at your mercy and didn’t care. his hand twitched toward the nearby beer, his throat dry from the anger that kept simmering, boiling over. with a quick flick, he cracked it open, foam spilling over the edge as he downed half of it in one long gulp, desperate for something—anything—to numb the pain cutting into him. the bitter taste coated his mouth, his lips curling in disgust as he wiped them with the back of his hand. jay. it always came back to fucking jay. jungwon downed the rest of the beer, slamming the empty can onto the desk so hard the noise echoed through the room. his head dropped into his hands, shoulders trembling as the weight of it all crushed him, pressing down until he couldn’t take it anymore. “fuck.”
jay had slipped into your life so easily, it was almost hard to remember a time when he wasn’t around. he visited often now, seamlessly fitting into your friend group, and even got close with jake and sunghoon. it felt like he’d always been there, like he belonged. jungwon, though, had been a different story. after that night, after everything, he’d been distant for a while. but now? now, he sat right next to jay on the couch, controller in hand, eyes glued to the xbox screen like nothing had ever happened. he seemed fine—more than fine, actually. like he’d accepted everything, like he wasn’t even phased by the way jay had embedded himself into your world. tonight wasn’t any different. jay was over again, sitting in his usual spot, and everyone else was gathered in the living room too. the sound of the xbox filled the space, a low hum of explosions and gunfire. jake was sprawled on one couch, half-asleep with a soda can dangling from his hand, while sunghoon sat on the floor, shoving popcorn into his mouth like he hadn’t eaten in days. you perched on the arm of the couch, watching jay and jungwon play another round of whatever shooting game they’d gotten into. it was almost funny—how easily they got along now, how the tension that once lingered between them had melted away. "we're crushing it," jay laughed, glancing at jungwon with a grin.
jungwon cracked a rare, genuine smile, his eyes still on the screen. "don’t get cocky," he muttered, smirking. "you only won 'cause i carried." jay nudged him with his elbow, his grin widening. “team effort, man.” you couldn’t help but smile, watching the way they bantered so naturally. jungwon, the one who usually kept his cool, had loosened up around jay in a way you hadn’t expected. maybe it was surprising how quickly they’d become friends, but it was a relief too. “you two make a good team,” you teased, swinging your legs over the edge of the couch, your voice light, trying to ignore the small tug of something in your chest. “yeah, guess i don’t mind him hanging around,” jungwon said, shaking his head with a small laugh, like he couldn’t quite believe it either. jay shot you a teasing grin. “wow, jungwon actually tolerates me now. i must be doing something right.” jungwon rolled his eyes, but the smirk on his face made it clear he didn’t mind the teasing. “don’t get too comfortable.” jake, who had been half-listening, suddenly perked up, pointing lazily at the screen. “jungwon’s just mad 'cause jay’s better at the game now. remember the first time he played? total trash.” “not trash,” jay argued, raising his hands defensively. “just... learning.”
jungwon chuckled, leaning back into the couch. "yeah, yeah. let's see if you can hold your own in the next round." it was weird seeing jungwon like this—so relaxed, so easygoing. he was always the serious one, the one who kept things close to his chest. but around jay? it was like the walls he usually built around himself had crumbled. “so, when’s the next big project at work?” sunghoon asked between mouthfuls of popcorn. "you two have basically been glued to your desks." you laughed softly, shaking your head. “we’re almost done, thank god. then maybe we can actually hang out like normal people again.” jay smiled, his voice warm and casual. “yeah, maybe we can all do something. outside of work for a change.” jake grinned, tossing a pillow across the room at jay. “you gonna pay for dinner, rich boy?” jay caught the pillow, laughing. “guess i’m buying.” jungwon laughed too, shaking his head at the back-and-forth. "yeah, you owe us." for a second, everything felt perfect. like the puzzle pieces of your life had finally clicked into place. jay was here, a part of it all, and jungwon—jungwon had accepted it. accepted him. it should’ve been a relief, but something about the whole thing gnawed at you. jungwon’s shift in attitude, the way he seemed so... okay with everything. it was too sudden. too easy. but you shoved the thought aside. maybe it was nothing. maybe you were overthinking it. “all right, rematch?” jay suggested, glancing at jungwon with a playful smirk.
jungwon grabbed his controller again, eyes gleaming with determination. “let’s do it.” they dove back into the game, and as the laughter and playful insults filled the room, you sat back, content for the moment. but that small, nagging voice in the back of your mind wouldn’t go away. jungwon’s sudden acceptance felt... off. like there was more under the surface, something he wasn’t saying. you shook the thought away, focusing on the present. jay and jungwon were getting along, and that was enough. for now. “hey,” jay’s voice broke through your thoughts, pulling you back to the room. “you’re up next, right?” you grinned, feeling the weight lift from your shoulders for a moment. “oh, i’m definitely taking you down.” the room was filled with laughter again, and as the game continued, you tried to let yourself believe that this—right here—was how things were supposed to be. but somewhere deep down, you couldn’t shake the feeling that it was all just a little too perfect.
you and jay were both at the office, the hum of workday chatter filling the background. jay sat beside you at the office like he belonged there. he was on his break, lazily fiddling with a rubik’s cube, his brow furrowed as if it took real concentration, but you could feel his eyes darting to you every few seconds. that signature smirk lingered on his lips, like he had something else on his mind. “you ever solve one of these?” jay asked, twisting the cube with a sharp click. you laughed softly, shaking your head. “nope, never had the patience.” just as you were about to send off an email, your phone buzzed against the desk. you glanced down at the screen. jake: hey y/n, we’re taking jungwon out for drinks tonight! your eyebrows shot up. jungwon? drinks? that wasn’t something that happened often. you tapped a quick reply, but the thought lingered, pulling at your attention. he wasn’t exactly the most social guy, especially when it came to drinking. curiosity piqued, you quickly typed back a response. “what’s up?” jay asked, his voice cutting through your thoughts. his eyes tracked your every move, fingers still idly playing with the cube. “just jake,” you said, leaning back in your chair, tapping the phone lightly against your thigh. “they’re taking jungwon out for drinks tonight. guess he’s warming up to being social.” jay smirked, tossing the rubik’s cube onto the desk and crossing his arms. “he’s been pretty chill lately, especially with me. didn’t think that’d happen.” “me neither,” you admitted, your gaze shifting fully to jay. “he’s always been kinda... closed off, but now it’s like he’s finally enjoying being around people. especially you.”
jay shrugged, though you could see the flicker of pride in his eyes. “guess i’m just that irresistible, huh?” you rolled your eyes, but smiled all the same. “yeah, sure, that must be it.” you leaned in closer, dropping your voice. “but seriously, it’s nice seeing him open up. he’s been through a lot, and seeing him happy... well, it makes me happy.” the conversation lulled for a moment, the office noise fading into the background. jay’s fingers drummed softly on the desk, and you could feel him thinking, like there was something on his mind he hadn’t said yet. “speaking of happy...” jay started, his voice quieter, more thoughtful now. “this might be... really bad timing, but i’ve been wanting to ask you something.” you raised an eyebrow, intrigued but slightly cautious. “oh? what’s up?”
he hesitated for a beat, his eyes locking with yours. gone was the teasing smirk, replaced with something more sincere, something that had your pulse picking up speed. “i was wondering...” jay leaned in just a little, the space between you two feeling more intimate, more personal. “would you wanna go out with me tonight? like... on a real date?” your heart did a quick somersault. jay had always been playful, teasing, but this? this was different. this was real—just him, asking you out with none of the usual jokes to hide behind. “an actual date?” you echoed, your voice soft as a smile began tugging at your lips. jay nodded, his fingers now absentmindedly tracing the edge of the desk, like he needed something to focus on besides your reaction. “yeah. i mean, we’ve hung out a lot, but i want to take you out properly. no more just hanging out at your place.” warmth bloomed in your chest, spreading through your body as nerves fluttered in your stomach. jay had always made you feel comfortable, always been someone who could make you laugh, but now he was offering something more. something you hadn’t even realized you’d been waiting for.
“i’d like that,” you said softly, your smile growing wider. “yeah, i’d really like that.” jay’s entire expression lit up, the tension in his shoulders melting away as relief washed over him. “really?” “really,” you confirmed, feeling the flutter of anticipation start to build inside you. he let out a breath, grinning wide as he leaned back, his confidence slipping back into place. “all right, guess i’ll have to plan something good then.” you laughed, shaking your head. “no pressure or anything.” “trust me,” jay chuckled, though the warmth in his eyes now had your pulse racing even faster. “i’ve got it covered.” the office seemed to fade away as you both sat there, the moment stretching between you, feeling just right. like this was exactly where you were supposed to be. “tonight, then,” jay said, his eyes never leaving yours. “tonight,” you echoed, feeling the weight of the promise in your own voice.
jay stood up, stretching a little before throwing you a glance over his shoulder. “oh, and wear my favorite,” he added, his tone dropping a little, laced with something more suggestive. you blinked, your smile faltering for just a second. “your favorite?” jay smirked, leaning closer, his breath brushing your ear as he whispered, “baby blue.” the memory of the set he was referring to flashed in your mind—the one you’d worn in a photo that had gotten a reaction out of him before. your cheeks flushed, the air between you two thickening with the weight of suggestion. “oh, that set.” “yeah... that one.” his fingers brushed against your arm, just barely grazing your skin, leaving a trail of heat in their wake before he turned, heading back to his desk. the light touch, the way his voice had dropped—it left you breathless, heart pounding against your chest. anticipation simmered under your skin, and you couldn’t stop the grin from spreading across your face as you stared at your computer screen, already counting down the hours until tonight.
the apartment was buzzing with the usual pre-party energy when you got home, the low hum of excitement filtering through the walls. jungwon was already half-dressed, moving through the space like he had all the time in the world, while you rushed, desperately trying to get ready in time for your date with jay. “ugh, i’m running so late,” you muttered, throwing a glance at the mirror, your nerves on full display. nothing felt right, nothing was working, and time was running out. jungwon paused, leaning against his doorframe with that familiar smirk playing on his lips. “nervous for the big date?” his tone dripped with amusement, eyes trailing lazily over your frazzled state. “yeah,” you muttered, rifling through your drawer with a touch of panic. “jay’s picking me up soon, and i need to look perfect.” jungwon’s eyes flickered to the bed, where you’d laid out your baby blue lingerie—the set you knew jay liked. the comment came before he could stop himself. “nice choice.” his voice sounded casual, but you didn’t catch the way his eyes darkened as he stared at the delicate fabric. you barely glanced up, focused on finding the right shoes. “yeah, jay loves this one. figured it’d be a nice surprise.”
jungwon’s jaw clenched. jay’s favorite? something ugly coiled in his chest, why the hell should jay get that? he felt his phone buzz in his pocket—jake, impatient as ever, reminding him to hurry up. jungwon's gaze lingered on the lingerie for another moment, and then, he made his move. while you were still distracted, jungwon slipped into your room, pretending to grab his jacket. with one swift motion, he swiped the baby blue panties from the bed and stuffed them into his pocket. his heart pounded, but outwardly he remained calm, collected. “you seen my—” you turned, catching jungwon mid-movement as he pulled on his jacket, already halfway to the door. “oh, you’re leaving already?” you asked, still half-focused on getting yourself together. “yeah, jake’s blowing up my phone,” jungwon said, flashing you a quick, cool smile, his hand pressing the stolen lace deeper into his pocket. “good luck with your date. i’m sure jay’ll love that surprise.” “thanks,” you mumbled absentmindedly, not even looking up as you fumbled with your outfit. "have fun with the guys." as soon as jungwon was gone, you turned back to the bed, reaching for the lingerie. but something was wrong. the panties were missing.
"what the hell...?" you muttered, confused, rifling through the covers and around the room. i just put them here. you tore through your drawers, irritation bubbling up as your search turned up nothing. “ugh, whatever,” you muttered under your breath, deciding on the black lace set instead. the clock was ticking, and the last thing you needed was to be late. jay won’t mind, you told yourself, trying to push aside the frustration, but a nagging feeling of something missing lingered. jungwon, on the other hand, was already out the door, heading to meet jake and sunghoon, the baby blue panties securely tucked into his jacket pocket.
that small act gave him a twisted sense of control, a flicker of satisfaction, but beneath it all, a cold wave of futility crept in. what the fuck is this even for? he wondered, but couldn’t stop himself. it wouldn’t change a damn thing between you and jay. stealing your lingerie, messing with your plans—none of it would stop the fact that you’d be with him tonight. yet, knowing you wouldn’t be wearing that special set for jay, his favorite set, felt like a small, fucked-up victory. as the elevator doors slid shut, jungwon caught a glimpse of his reflection. what the hell am i doing? he ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head, but the question didn’t matter anymore. you’re not wearing that for jay, and that was enough to ease the coil of frustration in his chest. sliding into the backseat of jake’s car, jungwon’s mood clashed against the upbeat energy of the others. jake and sunghoon were hyped, laughing, planning out their night, but jungwon barely heard them. his fingers drifted to the pocket where the soft lace sat, his mind replaying the moment he’d swiped them from your bed, the way you’d been too distracted to notice.
his hand moved absentmindedly, tracing the delicate fabric as jake’s voice rambled on about which club to hit first. you’ll never even suspect me, he thought, a smug satisfaction settling in. there was no way you’d ever connect jungwon to your missing panties. that innocent, oblivious part of you wouldn’t even consider it. he leaned back in his seat, letting the rush of adrenaline mix with the twisted satisfaction that came from knowing you’d be out with jay tonight—wearing something else. completely unaware of what was missing. and in that moment, despite everything, jungwon felt like he was winning.
jungwon slouched back in the booth, the relentless thrum of the club’s bass pounding through his chest. lights flickered, neon blues and purples flashing across the crowded dance floor, but it all blurred together into a scene he couldn’t care less about. the chatter, the laughter, the sweaty bodies swaying to the beat—it was suffocating, only reminding him of everything he didn’t want to think about. he didn’t want to be here. hell, he didn’t want to be anywhere. but jake and sunghoon had dragged him out, practically forcing him to "get out of his head." now, here he was, at some fancy table heeseung had hooked them up with, surrounded by people celebrating god knows what. “lighten up, man.” jake nudged him, grinning as he took another swig from his beer. “heeseung pulled some strings for this, we should be having fun.” “yeah,” sunghoon leaned back, tossing a casual smirk his way. “it’s not like you’ve got anything better to do.” jungwon barely managed a tight smile, they meant well, but it didn’t change the fact that he felt like he was suffocating. sitting here, pretending to enjoy himself, it was like the weight of everything was pressing harder on his chest. sure, it was better than being back at the flat, buried in your bed, breathing in the faint scent of your perfume from the pillow you’d left behind. a little less pathetic, maybe. but being here wasn’t much better. because here, he couldn’t escape the thoughts, the images playing over and over in his mind. you with jay.
“you good?” jake asked, his voice cutting through jungwon’s thoughts. his brow furrowed as he glanced over, clearly picking up on the tension rolling off him. “you’ve been weird all night.” jungwon’s response was quick, sharper than he meant it to be. “i’m fine.” he exhaled, trying to push down the frustration that threatened to spill over. no, i’m not fucking fine. sunghoon raised a brow, exchanging a glance with jake. “dude, you always say that. you’ve been holed up in your room for days. what’s gives?” jungwon didn’t answer. how could he explain it? how could he tell them that every time you walked out that door, it felt like a piece of him left with you? every time you left, he’d retreat to your room, curling up in your bed, clinging to whatever was left of you. burying his face in your clothes, pretending, even for just a few moments, that you were still there. it was fucked up. he knew that. but it was the only way to deal with the rage.
this night was supposed to be an escape. a distraction from the thoughts that tortured him, from the idea of you with him. but all it did was amplify it. with every drink, every laugh, every passing moment, he could feel the jealousy tightening around his throat like a noose. because no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t stop seeing it—you and jay. your laughter, your smile, the way you’d look at jay like he was your whole world. the way jungwon wished, more than anything, you’d look at him. he squeezed his eyes shut, wishing the pounding bass of the club could drown out the thoughts, the sickening ache in his chest. but it didn’t. he hated it. hated that no matter where he was, no matter what he did, it was always you. always jay. and it was destroying him from the inside out. jungwon watched as jake and sunghoon disappeared onto the dance floor, their laughter swallowed by the thumping bass and flashing lights. he was left alone, gripping his drink tightly, the alcohol buzzed through his veins, but it wasn’t enough to quiet the ache burning in his chest.
he missed you. god, he missed you so much it fucking hurt. his fingers slipped into his jacket pocket, brushing against the soft lace of your stolen panties, the secret that no one else knew about. but even that, even taking something so personal from you, felt useless. he missed the way you used to burst into his room unannounced, complaining about your day or teasing him for never leaving the apartment. he missed the way you leaned against him when you were too tired to hold your head up but refused to leave. now, everything felt distant, cold. and this drink? it was doing fuck all to help. and then, he saw you. jungwon’s heart leapt into his throat, his pulse racing as his eyes locked on you, stepping into the club like you owned the room. for a split second, hope flared, blinding and irrational. maybe you’d come looking for him, maybe you missed him too. his lips twitched, the beginning of a smile breaking free. but then he saw him. jay.
that flicker of hope was crushed under the weight of reality. jay, walking in behind you, his hand resting at the small of your back like he fucking owned you. like you were his. something twisted deep in jungwon’s gut, the jealousy simmering hotter now, searing through him. his hand clenched around the glass, the edges pressing into his palm as he watched jay guide you through the crowd, his touch too casual, too possessive. it was like a punch to the gut, knocking the breath right out of him. his mind screamed, desperate to believe this wasn’t happening, that you hadn’t already slipped away from him. but watching jay pull you closer, seeing how easily you leaned into him, jungwon knew. jay was winning. jungwon drained his drink, the alcohol burning down his throat, but it did nothing to numb the burn in his chest. seeing you like this—in that fucking dress, looking so perfect it made him want to tear something apart—it was unbearable. he wondered if you were wearing the black or white lingerie he knew you loved. or maybe something else. maybe something jay had picked out for you. his jaw tightened as he kept his eyes on you, unwilling to look away. he stayed rooted to the spot, slipping into the shadows where he could watch without being seen. from there, he could see everything—every touch, every smile, every laugh you gave to jay like it was his right.
from a distance, it was easier to let the jealousy fester, to let it simmer and burn without having to fake a smile, without pretending everything was okay. his smirk returned, dark and twisted, as he watched jay pull you closer, his hand sliding down to rest on your hip. you were his now, weren’t you? the thought twisted deeper, like a knife in his chest. jungwon leaned against the wall, his eyes never leaving you, waiting for something—anything—to break. he let the jealousy, the rage, boil inside him, his fingers tracing over the lace hidden in his pocket, the one thing he had taken from you, something only he knew about. he glanced at jake and sunghoon, who were lost somewhere in the back, wrapped around a couple of girls, laughing and whispering in their ears like they had no worries in the world. good. let them leave. he didn’t need their company tonight. tonight was about you. his eyes snapped back to you, and the sight made his stomach churn. you were laughing, leaning into jay, your hand resting on his arm like it was the most natural thing in the world. he fucking hated jay. he wanted to hate jay. he wanted to find something, anything, that would make him feel justified for the burning jealousy tearing him apart. but he couldn’t. no matter how hard he tried, jay was… perfect. and worst of all? jay made you happy. that’s what killed him the most.
because no matter how much he wanted you, no matter how much he needed you, jungwon knew deep down he would never be the one to make you happy like that. he’d never make you smile like jay did, never make you laugh like that, never be enough. and it fucking destroyed him. he leaned back into the shadows, eyes fixed on you, watching, waiting, stewing in his jealousy, his rage, his desperation.
he would never let you go. jungwon had called it. barely a few minutes after he slipped into the shadows, jake and sunghoon came stumbling back over to where he’d been sitting, girls hanging off their arms, wide smiles and flushed cheeks. they didn’t even have to say anything—the looks on their faces said it all. jake raised an eyebrow, smirking, while sunghoon winked, sealing the unspoken deal. they were about to make their exit. jungwon’s phone buzzed in his pocket. he didn’t even need to look, already knowing what it would say. sure enough, there were texts from both of them. jake: bro, we’re heading out, see you later? sunghoon: you good? catch you tomorrow.
a bitter chuckle slipped out before he could stop it. he quickly typed out a reply, already drained by their carefree energy. jungwon: already left. have fun. from his hidden spot, he watched as jake and sunghoon exchanged glances, glancing around like they might actually give a shit about where he was before shrugging it off. they disappeared into the crowd with their arms slung around the girls, laughing like they had the night in the palm of their hands. good riddance. now he didn’t have to fake a damn thing. no more keeping up appearances, no more pretending. now he could stay hidden, drown in cheap liquor, and watch the night unfold the way he knew it would.
“hey, handsome.” the voice was low, sultry, but it grated against jungwon’s nerves like nails on a chalkboard. he barely noticed her at first, until she was right up against him, pressing her body close, her fingers trailing lightly across his chest. he glanced down at her with cold, empty eyes. the dim lighting of the club cast shadows across her face, but even in the dark, he could see the desperation gleaming in her eyes, the too-eager smile playing on her lips. she had been watching him all night, and now, she finally thought she had her chance. without a word, jungwon reached up and gently pushed her hand away, his fingers curling around her wrist for just a second before letting go. “don’t.” his voice was flat, emotionless, his gaze already drifting back to where you were standing with jay. but the girl didn’t take the hint. she leaned in closer, her breath hot against his neck. “come on, don’t be like that. you look like you could use some company.” his jaw clenched, the retort he wanted to spit out getting stuck in his throat. he took a step back, creating some distance, but she followed him, her hands reaching for him again like she hadn’t just been told off. “i said don’t,” he snapped this time, his voice sharp, cold. jungwon’s patience was already wearing thin. “what’s your problem?” she pouted, her fingers still brushing against his chest, her body pressing even closer. “you’re just sitting here all alone. let me make you feel better.” jungwon’s eyes flicked back to her, darkening. “you reek,” he said bluntly, his tone icy. the girl blinked, caught off guard. “uh, excuse me?” “if you keep touching me, you’re gonna fucking regret it.”
she laughed nervously, her confidence cracking as uncertainty flickered in her eyes. “wow, okay. someone’s got issues.” jungwon leaned in, his face inches from hers, his voice dropping to a dangerous whisper. “are you my stepsister?” her expression twisted in confusion, a nervous laugh escaping her lips. “uh, what? no, what does that even—" jungwon’s lips curled into a cruel smirk, the intensity of his gaze making her instinctively step back. “nothing. but next time you push yourself on someone, maybe think twice.” she stared at him, her bravado crumbling under the weight of his words. her face twisted in disgust as she backed off, muttering, “you’re fucking weird,” before turning and disappearing into the crowd. he didn’t watch her leave. didn’t care. his focus was already elsewhere. he knocked back another shot, the alcohol scorching down his throat, his eyes locked on you again.
later that night, jay picked you up, looking effortlessly perfect in his usual style—black jeans, a fitted shirt that hugged his body in all the right places, and that smug grin that never seemed to leave his face. you’d dressed for the occasion, slipping into a sleek, curve-hugging dress that made you feel confident, sexy, a little daring. as the two of you made your way to the club he’d picked for the evening, you chuckled under your breath, taking in the neon lights and feeling the thrumming bass vibrating beneath your feet. “really? a club?” you teased, glancing at him with a raised eyebrow. “what kind of gentleman brings a woman to a club on their first date?” jay smirked, his hand casually sliding to the small of your back, guiding you inside. “a gentleman who knows how jealous you got every time our colleagues went clubbing while we were stuck at work.” your eyebrow shot up, surprised he’d picked up on that. “i didn’t think you paid attention.” jay leaned in close, his voice dropping just low enough to make your skin tingle. “trust me, y/n, i notice everything about you.” his words sent a rush through you, a blush creeping up your neck as you smiled and shook your head, trying to play it cool. despite the loud music and the bustling crowd, something about this felt perfect. you nudged him playfully. “okay, maybe you do have some charm after all.” jay grinned wider, pulling you closer as the two of you moved through the dimly lit space. “some charm? come on, i’ve got plenty.” you couldn’t help but smile, feeling the pull of his energy. he led you to a table near the edge of the dance floor, the music loud enough to shake your bones, but instead of overwhelming you, it seemed to ground you. jay sat close, his hand resting possessively on your thigh under the table, sending little sparks of excitement through your body.
“so, what do you think?” jay leaned in, his breath warm against your ear. “better than the office, right?” you laughed, feeling the weight of the moment settle between you. “okay, fine, you win. better than the office. but only because you knew i was jealous.” jay’s grin widened, and for a second, his eyes darkened with something deeper. “hey, just trying to keep my girl happy,” he said smoothly, the words slipping out so easily they made your heart skip a beat. before you could overthink it, he was pulling you to your feet, leading you toward the dance floor. “come on, let’s dance,” he urged, tugging you into the crowd. the two of you fell into a rhythm easily, your bodies moving together in sync with the pulsing music. the tension between you grew with every beat, every movement, jay’s hands firm on your hips, pulling you against him. the heat of his body mixed with the electric energy of the club, making it impossible to think of anything else. as the lights flickered and danced across the walls, jay pressed closer, his hands sliding lower, his touch lingering in a way that made it clear you were his tonight. and god, you loved it—loved the way he made you feel alive, reckless, like nothing else mattered but the two of you. the alcohol was hitting now, loosening your inhibitions, making everything a little hazier, a little more intense. you laughed more, leaned into jay’s touch more, feeling lighter, freer. the air between you was thick with something more than just fun, and jay’s breath against your neck as he moved with you only made it harder to ignore the tension building between you. “you good?” he teased, his lips brushing against your ear, his hands roaming dangerously low. “better than good,” you grinned, your voice playful but laced with desire. “you?” jay chuckled, his hips pressing harder into yours. “i think you know the answer to that.” the night became a blur of dancing, shots, laughter, and more teasing touches. at some point, as you ground your hips back against jay, you felt the unmistakable hardness pressing against your lower back. the heat pooled in your stomach, and without thinking, you threw a playful glance over your shoulder. “oops,” you said with a smirk, teasing him. jay raised an eyebrow, clearly amused. “oops?” he repeated, his tone dripping with sarcasm. “that’s all you’ve got to say?” you bit your lip, still moving against him, testing how far you could push. “what? i thought you were supposed to be a gentleman?”
jay groaned softly, his hands tightening on your hips. “gentleman or not, you keep grinding on me like that,” he murmured into your ear, his voice dark and rough, “and i might forget all my manners.” your heart raced, loving the way you were pushing him. “oh really?” you whispered, turning just enough for your lips to brush against his cheek. “so, what are you gonna do about it?” his eyes darkened further, and all the teasing vanished from his expression. his hand slid around your waist, pulling you closer, his body flush against yours. “you sure you wanna test me, y/n?” his voice was low, a dangerous edge to it that made your pulse quicken. you swallowed hard, but you couldn’t resist pushing him further. “i dunno,” you whispered, still teasing. “i kinda like seeing you like this.” jay’s chuckle was dark, low in his throat. “you think you’re cute, don’t you?” he muttered, pressing harder against you. “grinding on me, saying ‘oops’ like it’s nothing.” your pulse quickened, your body reacting to every word, every touch. “maybe,” you breathed. “maybe i thought you could handle it.” his lips grazed your neck, sending a shiver down your spine. “i can handle it,” he murmured, “but can you?” you turned in his arms, your bodies still swaying to the music, faces inches apart. his eyes were dark with desire, the teasing grin gone. “so much for being a gentleman,” you whispered. jay smirked, pulling you tighter. “even a gentleman has his limits, y/n.”
the heat between you both was almost unbearable now, the tension so thick it was suffocating. you leaned in closer, lips brushing his ear as you whispered, “by the way... i didn’t end up wearing your favorite tonight.” jay raised an eyebrow, his voice low and rough as he pressed his hips harder into yours. “oh yeah?” he murmured, “good thing i’m gonna be ripping them off anyway.” his words sent a thrill down your spine, and before you could respond, his lips crashed against yours, hot and desperate. the kiss was messy, consuming, tongues tangling as you both finally gave in to the tension that had been building all night. your hands fisted in his shirt, pulling him closer, your body arching into his as he groaned into your mouth.
but as you got lost in jay’s touch, you were completely unaware of the dark eyes watching you from the shadows. jungwon sat back, his drink forgotten, his vision narrowing until all he could see was you and jay—your hands all over each other, your lips locked in a kiss that made his blood boil. he felt nothing but pure, unfiltered rage. you pulled away from jay, breathless, your lips swollen from the kiss. “we should get out of here,” jay whispered, his voice rough with need. “yeah, let’s go back to mine,” you agreed, running a hand through your hair, still catching your breath. jungwon’s world spun. he couldn’t hear the words, but he saw it all—the way your body language shifted, the way you and jay talked, like you were about to leave. like you were going home together. his stomach twisted, bile rising in his throat. you were about to leave with jay. you were going to go home with him. jungwon shoved through the crowd, his mind racing. he couldn’t let this happen. he had to get home first, had to do something before you and jay got there. before something happened that he couldn’t stop. his hands clenched into fists as he stormed toward the exit.
jungwon barely made it. he’d fucking sprinted the whole way, the flat wasn’t far from the club, but every second felt like it stretched into an eternity. his chest was tight, lungs burning as he raced, a sickening mix of desperation and fury pushing him harder. he knew you too well—knew you wouldn’t bother going far. not when you looked like you were ready to be fucked the moment you left that dance floor. the thought twisted his gut, but it also fueled him. he had to move faster. had to stop it. he burst into the flat, his breath ragged, each step slamming against the floor, reverberating through the walls. there was no fucking time. he stormed straight to his room, the door slamming so hard behind him it rattled the frame. his mind raced, pulse thundering in his ears, each thought more fucked up than the last. every step forward felt like he was spiraling deeper into madness, but he didn’t care. he stumbled over to his desk, fingers trembling, yanking the drawer open so hard it nearly came off the tracks. inside, neatly tucked away, was the fully charged battery he always kept on standby. his hands shook as he grabbed it, almost dropping it in his frantic state. no time to waste. he bolted down the hall, his feet barely hitting the floor, his heart slamming against his ribcage. your room. he shoved the door open, eyes wild as he stormed inside. everything felt too slow, too fucking slow. he tore the old battery out of the hidden camera lodged in the eye of the teddy bear on your dresser. his hands fumbled, slipping as nerves made him clumsy, cursing under his breath. “fuck, come on,” he hissed, voice low, barely containing the panic that was surging up his throat.
finally, the new battery clicked into place, and the camera blinked to life, the red light staring back at him. jungwon stood there for a moment, frozen, staring at the tiny lens. his breath was shallow, chest heaving. his entire body felt like it was on the verge of breaking apart. soon, too soon, you and jay would walk through that door. and he’d have to watch it. all of it. the thought sent a wave of nausea crashing over him, and for a second, he thought he might actually be sick. but he swallowed it down, fists clenched so tight his knuckles turned white, and stormed back to his room. the door slammed shut behind him, the sound echoing through the flat like a gunshot, but he didn’t give a fuck. he dropped into his chair, fingers trembling as he flipped open his laptop. the screen flickered to life, casting a harsh glow across his face. he waited, breath caught in his throat, until the live feed blinked onto the screen—your bedroom, empty, waiting for what would happen next. but it wasn’t enough. not for this. his mind was racing too fast, spinning out of control. he knew you wouldn’t just stay in the bedroom, not with jay. you’d move, probably to the kitchen, the couch—wherever things got heated next. he couldn’t fucking risk it.
jungwon shot up from his chair, grabbing another small camera he had stashed away for emergencies. this was it. this was the emergency. sprinting down the hall, he made his way to the kitchen, eyes scanning the room for the perfect spot. his gaze landed on a shelf near the counter, cluttered with just enough shit to hide the camera. he positioned it meticulously, adjusting it until it captured everything—the counter, the table, the couch, all of it. he stood back, staring at the tiny lens nestled among the clutter, knowing it would record every fucking thing that happened tonight. jungwon rushed back to his room, his body vibrating with adrenaline. he slammed himself down in front of the laptop, hands shaking as he switched the live feed back on. the screen split into two—your bedroom, the kitchen. every angle covered. he could see it all now. his breath came in sharp, shallow bursts as the weight of what he’d done settled over him like a heavy fog. his pulse thundered in his ears, his heart hammering against his ribs. all that was left to do was wait. wait for you and jay to walk through that door. and then watch. watch it all unfold, every fucked up second of it. he wasn’t sure if he wanted to scream, break something, or just let the rage consume him entirely. but he would wait. and he would fucking watch.
you and jay stumbled down the street, the night air biting at your skin, but you barely noticed it—too caught up in the alcohol buzz and the warmth of jay pressed up against you. his arm was draped lazily over your shoulders, fingers teasing the back of your neck as he whispered something in your ear, something filthy that made you laugh too loud, breathless. the world around you blurred, nothing mattered except him—his scent, the way his fingers lingered a little too long at the small of your back, sending heat rushing through you. you were both drunk, careless, and the electricity between you crackled like it was ready to explode. before you knew it, the flat loomed in front of you, your feet carrying you faster than your mind could keep up. the walk was too quick, too easy, like you both knew exactly where this was headed. lights off, no one home, the night was yours. and his. no need for keys, no time for second thoughts. the door clicked shut behind you, and before you could even blink, jay was on you, hands everywhere, lips crashing into yours with a hunger that knocked the air out of your lungs. your back slammed against the wall, and you gasped, not from pain but from the sheer intensity of it all. “fuck,” jay muttered into your mouth, his hands already gripping your waist, dragging you against him like he’d been holding back all night. “been waiting for this.” you let out a breathy laugh, tipping your head back to give him better access to your neck, his lips quick to find the sensitive skin there. “could tell,” you teased, tugging at his shirt, fingers twisting in the fabric. “impatient, aren’t you?”
his teeth grazed your neck, and you moaned, barely able to form coherent thoughts as his hands wandered lower, rough, desperate. “can you blame me?” his voice was low, thick with desire, breath hot against your skin. “i know you want it just as bad.” you let out a shaky laugh, your chest heaving as his fingers trailed dangerously close to the hem of your dress. “confident, aren’t you?” jay grinned against your skin, his hands sliding up your thighs, gripping them tight enough to leave marks. “i’d call it certainty,” he breathed into your ear, teeth grazing the shell of it. “i know exactly what you want.” your heart pounded in your chest, the heat between you two thickening, suffocating. you turned, eyes locking with his, daring him, testing him. “prove it.” he didn’t need to be told twice. his lips slammed back against yours, slower now, but deeper, as if he was trying to drown you in the kiss. his teeth tugged at your lower lip before pulling back, a smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth as his hands roamed lower. with one sharp motion, he grabbed the fabric of your dress and ripped it, the sound echoing in the dark hallway. “jay!” you gasped, half-shocked, half-amused as you looked down at the ruined dress. “i liked that dress.” he smirked, unbothered, lips grazing yours again, his hands rough against your bare skin. “i’ll buy you a new one,” he muttered, eyes dark with lust, his fingers already sliding under the waistband of your panties.
you were breathless, heat pooling low in your belly as his hands wandered further, fingers ghosting over the spot that had you aching for him. “reckless bastard,” you muttered, but the thrill was unmistakable in your voice. his lips found your neck again, sucking hard enough to bruise, and you moaned, your hands tangling in his hair, tugging him closer, urging him on. the world outside of this moment didn’t exist, not the flat, not the night, not the possibility of anyone walking in. it was just you and him, and the growing tension between you that felt like it was about to snap. just as you were ready to lose yourself completely in him, jay pulled back, breath ragged, eyes dark. “wait… jungwon,” he muttered, voice thick with desire. “think he’s home?” the mention of your stepbrother brought reality crashing down, if only for a second. you blinked, your pulse still racing, body still pressed tight against jay’s. jungwon. he was supposed to be out with jake and sunghoon, but… “i don’t think so,” you mumbled, uncertainty creeping into your voice. “he’s out with the guys, but…”
jay’s hands tightened on your waist, a low chuckle rumbling from his chest. “then who gives a shit?” his voice was low, teasing. “even if he is home, we’ll just be quiet.” he smirked, leaning in closer, lips brushing your ear. “unless you want him to hear.” your breath hitched, the idea sending a shiver down your spine. the thought of jungwon walking in, seeing you like this, made you tense—but it also sent a thrill through you, something dark, something exciting. you bit your lip, glancing at jay. “he’d understand… right?” jay grinned, pulling you closer, his lips ghosting over yours. “trust me,” he whispered, voice low, filled with promise. “he won’t care. and if he does… we’ll just have to be quieter, won't we?” "take it off already," you demanded, pushing the thought of jungwon away, voice thick with desire as your fingers played at the hem of jay’s shirt. jay gave you that cocky grin, effortlessly peeling it off, exposing the hard lines of his bare chest to your touch. his skin was warm under your fingertips, and jay's grin only widened as he watched you take him in. your hands roamed over his chest, lingering, exploring, before trailing lower. "impatient tonight, aren’t we?" jay teased, his voice dripping with amusement as he leaned closer, his lips hovering dangerously close to yours.
"maybe," you shot back, playful, eyes daring him. "or maybe you're just taking too long." jay chuckled, his lips finally pressing against yours, hard and hungry. his hands slid over your body, pulling you closer, making you arch into him as he deepened the kiss. the way he touched you, like he couldn’t get enough, sent a heat through your veins, every brush of his fingers leaving you wanting more. his lips traveled down your neck, leaving a trail of heat in their wake. you moaned softly, fingers digging into his shoulders as he worked his way lower, his hands moving over every curve, every dip, like he was claiming you for himself. "you’re not comfortable, are you?" jay’s voice was a low, teasing murmur against your skin as his fingers traced the edges of your dress. you let out a breathy laugh, your fingers trailing across his chest. "i’ll manage. not like you’re giving me much of a chance to complain, are you?" jay smirked, lips brushing yours again, this time rougher, more impatient. "guess i’m not," he murmured, teeth grazing your lips as he pulled you closer. "but if you wanted to switch it up, i wouldn’t mind." his hands slid down to your hips, pulling you flush against him. "is that right?" you teased, pushing back slightly, enjoying the way his body tensed under your touch. "and where do you want me, then?" jay’s voice dropped, thick with want, his eyes dark with lust as he stared at you. "anywhere i can fuck you properly." your lips curved into a smile as you tugged at his waistband. "then maybe you should hurry up and get those off, too, hmm?" jay stepped back just enough to undo his belt, the sound of it hitting the floor echoing through the room. you leaned back against the counter, watching him with a playful smirk, the tension between you building with every second.
as his pants hit the floor, jay paused for a moment, his eyes meeting yours, that wicked grin still tugging at the corners of his lips. "let’s go to my room," you whispered, pulling him toward you as you slipped off the counter. jay’s eyes flickered with hunger, his hands never leaving your body as you led him down the hallway, the heat between you nearly unbearable as you disappeared into the dark.
in the dim glow of his room, jungwon’s jaw tightened. jay's smug voice grated against his ears. "smug fucking bastard," he snarled, teeth grinding, voice low and dripping with venom. he couldn't tear his eyes away, couldn’t stop himself from watching even though it was killing him inside. every move jay made felt like a taunt, a mockery of everything jungwon had ever wanted. the sight of jay’s hands on you—touching, claiming—was like acid burning through his veins. “you think you’re better than me? fuck you.” he hissed, his voice barely a whisper but sharp enough to cut. his heart hammered against his ribs, chest tight with the fury that bubbled up with every second. jay stripping you of the dress? that was his touch you should be feeling, his lips you should be kissing, not jay's. "you think you can just walk in and take her?" his vision blurred with white-hot anger, teeth sinking into his lip until he tasted blood. watching jay move, touch, and claim—jungwon's body trembled with how badly he wanted to tear it all apart. it wasn’t supposed to be like this.
his breath hitched as jay’s hands traveled lower, his body pressed against yours like he owned you. he fucking doesn’t. jungwon’s mind raced, his thoughts spiraling into an obsession he couldn’t control. i should be the one touching her. i should be the one kissing her like that. he couldn’t stop replaying it over and over—picturing himself in jay’s place, imagining how you would react to him instead. it should’ve been him pulling you close, feeling your body beneath his hands, hearing you whisper his name, not fucking jay. "i’ll make him pay," jungwon growled, voice hoarse with suppressed rage. his fingers twitched, itching to smash something, anything to stop this scene from unfolding in front of him. every breath jay took next to you felt like an insult, like he was stealing something that belonged to jungwon, ripping it right out of his hands. “fucking... asshole,” jungwon spat, chest rising and falling heavily, eyes fixed on jay’s stupid grin as he undid his belt. jungwon’s breath came faster, fury boiling over at how casual, how easy jay made it seem. like you were nothing more than something to pass the time with. he doesn’t deserve you. he’ll never fucking deserve you. when you tugged jay toward your room, jungwon’s breath hitched again, the room spinning around him. his room. his space. he was the one who should be walking down that hallway with you, not jay. he should be the one hearing your laugh, feeling your fingers pulling him close.
as jay disappeared with you down the hall, jungwon leaned back, cracking his knuckles one by one, eyes never leaving the screen. this isn’t over. not by a long shot. his vision blurred, eyes burning with the sting of unshed tears, but the anger—the fucking anger—that was stronger than anything else. jungwon leaned back, cracking his neck, a twisted smile forming on his lips. just wait. he would wait, watch, and when the time came, he’d destroy everything. everything jay thought he had. everything. you don’t even know what she needs. you’ll never be enough for her, he thought viciously, his mind racing with the sickening idea of tearing it all down. every bit of jay’s hold over you, he would destroy it. piece by piece. with one last look at the screen, jungwon’s hand reached for the mouse. the live feed flickered, showing your room, the kitchen, all the places you and jay might go. all the places jungwon would be waiting.
as you opened the door to your room, jay was on you before you even had the chance to take a step inside. his hands gripped your waist with that urgency you knew so well, lifting you like you weighed nothing and tossing you onto the bed with a cocky smirk that made your heart race. you couldn’t help the laugh that escaped you, your body sinking into the soft sheets, but it didn’t last long. jay was already between your legs, grabbing your ankle, pulling you closer to the edge of the bed until your thighs dangled off. his eyes were dark, hungry, like he couldn’t wait another second. your ripped dress barely hung on your body, teasing him with flashes of skin, and his fingers brushed the hem, slowly pushing it up as his gaze followed. he was taking his time, but you could see it in his eyes—he wanted to devour you. “you’re driving me fucking insane,” he muttered, his voice rough as his lips ghosted over your inner thigh. the heat between your legs was unbearable now, and the way his breath brushed your skin made you squirm. impatient, you slipped your panties off and tossed them aside, your body trembling with need. jay’s eyes flicked up to meet yours, his lips curling into a wicked grin. “oh? i was planning to rip those off myself.” he raised an eyebrow, teasing you. you giggled breathlessly. “good thing i didn’t wear the baby blue ones, huh?”
his chuckle was low, filled with mischief. “oh, i wouldn’t have dared... but these? yeah, they had to go.” his fingers traced your wet folds, teasing just enough to make your breath hitch, and you could feel the tension building in the pit of your stomach. “you’ve been waiting for this, haven’t you?” his voice was rough, full of desire as his fingers slid inside you, slow, deliberate, making you gasp. “like your pussy hasn’t been fucked in forever.” the heat of his words sent a wave of pleasure through you, your back arching as his thumb found your clit, circling with just enough pressure to make you tremble. “fuck,” you whimpered, gripping the sheets beneath you, your body practically melting under his touch. “that’s it,” he whispered, his lips brushing against your ear, his fingers working you over. “i’m gonna make up for all that lost time.” you moaned, unable to form a coherent response as his fingers curled inside you, each stroke pulling you deeper into a haze of pleasure. every movement, every touch had you unraveling, breathless and trembling. “i thought you were a gentleman,” you managed to say, your voice barely more than a sigh, pleasure clouding your thoughts. jay’s grin against your skin sent shivers down your spine. “who said i’m not?” his fingers continued their relentless rhythm. “maybe i’m just giving you exactly what you’ve wanted this whole time.”
he leaned back slightly, his hands trailing up to your breasts, thumbs brushing over your hardened nipples as he watched you squirm beneath him. “fuck, you’re so pretty,” he murmured, his voice thick with desire. before you could respond, his mouth was on your nipple, his tongue flicking over it, and you gasped, your back arching into him. the heat between you both was unbearable now, the thin fabric of his boxers doing little to hide just how hard he was. your legs wrapped around his waist instinctively, pulling him closer, your body aching for more. “move up,” you breathed, your hands tugging at his shoulders, needing him closer, needing more of him. jay groaned low in his throat, lifting himself just enough to adjust, sliding up over your body until he was fully on the bed, his weight pressing down on you in a way that made your whole body hum with anticipation. his lips found your neck, kissing, biting, sending sparks of pleasure through you. “better?” his voice was rough, strained with desire as he settled between your thighs again. “so much better,” you gasped, your nails digging into his back, urging him closer, needing him more than ever.
jungwon sat at his desk, elbows digging into the wood, fingers gripping his hair so tightly it felt like he might rip it out. his bloodshot eyes were locked onto the screen, the harsh light of his laptop casting deep shadows across his tired, hollow face. no matter how much his eyes burned, how dry his throat felt from panting, he couldn’t look away. his breath came in ragged gasps, mouth slightly open as he stared, feeling like the ground beneath him was crumbling. this couldn’t be real. it felt like a nightmare, one he couldn’t wake up from, watching jay touch you like that—watching you give in so easily, moaning under him, arching into his touch like you couldn’t get enough. “fuck,” jungwon whispered, voice shaky, his fists clenching tighter in his hair, trying to ground himself in the pain. maybe if he pulled hard enough, he’d snap out of this. maybe if he hurt enough, it’d drown out the scene playing in front of him.
but nothing worked. his body betrayed him. despite the anger boiling in his chest, he could feel himself hardening, his breath becoming more erratic as jay’s lips wrapped around your nipple, sucking, teasing, while you whimpered beneath him. jungwon’s vision blurred with rage, but there was something else too—something sick. something he couldn’t stop. “sucking on your tits like that...” jungwon muttered through gritted teeth, his voice low, venomous, watching jay's hands grip your waist, watching how easily you surrendered to him. it twisted jungwon’s stomach, made him feel disgusted with himself, but still—he kept watching. he always watched. he’d watched you before—seen you with other guys through teddy’s eyes. it killed him every time, watching you with someone else, but this? this was different. jay was different. jungwon had never let himself go this far before, never crossed that line. never touched himself while watching. there had always been that line, the one he swore he’d never cross, no matter how much it hurt.
but this time, his hand hovered closer, trembling. jay was different. he hated it. hated how fucking good jay was. he could see it—could fucking feel it—how much more desperate you were, how much more you needed jay. jungwon’s jaw clenched so hard he thought his teeth might crack. you were never like this with anyone else. “you’ve never fucking been like this before,” jungwon growled, fists shaking, eyes burning into the screen as your fingers tangled in jay’s hair, pulling him closer, your moans louder, more frantic. it was unbearable. you were never this desperate with anyone else. never this needy. the realization hit him like a punch to the gut: jay might even be better than him. something inside him snapped. the line he’d drawn for himself—the line that kept him from fully diving into this twisted, fucked-up obsession—blurred, then shattered completely. his hand shook as it moved toward his pants, his body acting on its own. there was no going back now. fuck it.
“no, no, no,” he hissed, frustration tearing through him, raw and suffocating. “why can’t you see? why the fuck can’t it be me?” the overwhelming urge to destroy something—anything—burned in his chest. he wanted to reach through the screen, rip jay away from you, stop this entire scene, but instead, his shaky hands fumbled for something else. your panties. fresh from the wash, but it didn’t matter. they were yours. they were enough. he brought them to his face, inhaling deeply, desperate for any trace of you, needing the connection, no matter how fucked up it was. his teeth bit down on the fabric, muffling the growl building in his chest, eyes glued to the screen, watching you, watching jay, feeling his whole body tremble with want, jealousy, and pure need. his hand moved lower, gripping his cock for the first time, unable to stop himself, unable to tear his gaze away from the scene unfolding before him. this should be me. why isn’t it me? "i’m just letting him borrow you," he whispered, breath ragged, hand moving desperately now as his eyes stayed fixed on you. "you’re mine."
"i'll make fucking sure of it," he gasped, his voice trembling, eyes rolling back as he struggled to keep watching. you were flipping jay over so easily, like you had all the control. like you were playing a game. “been wanting to suck your cock for the longest time now…” your voice, low and teasing, drifted through the speakers, and it sent him spiraling. his hand moved faster, strangled moans tearing from his throat as he watched you lower yourself between jay’s legs, that cheeky grin lighting up your face like you were enjoying every second of it. fuck. "shit," jungwon groaned, his breath shaky, watching as you took jay into your mouth, the obscene wet sounds filling the room, driving him closer to madness. “you should be doing that to me,” jungwon whimpered, his voice barely above a whisper, barely able to breathe. that should be him there, not fucking jay. the sight of you on your knees, lips wrapped around jay’s cock, burned into his mind, making his hand move faster, more frantic. “i’m the one who’s been waiting… not him,” he spat, pressing your panties harder against his cock, the fabric rubbing against him, heightening the sensation until he could barely think straight. jay’s groans filled the room, his hand cupping your cheek as you teased the tip of his cock, swirling your tongue around him slowly, making him tremble. jay’s breath hitched, voice thick with lust.
“shit… just suck me off,” jay’s voice was raw, impatience laced with desire. “or i swear, i’ll fuck you right now.” jungwon’s jaw tightened, his teeth grinding together as he watched you hold all the power over jay, completely in control. you had him wrapped around your finger. you smirked, dragging your tongue along the length of jay’s cock, savoring how his hips jerked forward, desperate for more, desperate for you. “y/n,” jay growled, voice heavy with need. “don’t make me wait.” and you didn’t. with that sly smile still on your face, you took him deeper, hollowing your cheeks, your hands gripping his thighs, steadying yourself as you worked him. “oh, fuck,” jay muttered, his hands tangling in your hair, pulling you closer, thrusting deeper. “shit, is this okay?” his voice was strained, trembling. “want to fuck your mouth, baby, will you let me?” the low moan you gave around his cock made jay groan, his hips bucking into your mouth, his control slipping, each thrust more eager, more desperate. he wasn’t waiting anymore—he was fucking your mouth now, deeper, harder with each motion. jungwon’s breath hitched, his strokes becoming frantic as he watched jay’s cock moving deeper into your throat, every sound, every moan, every whimper pushing him closer to the edge. he wasn’t going to last. not like this. not watching you like this.
he’s completely lost in it now, hands gripping your head firmly as he thrusts into your throat, groaning with every deep stroke, the sound of your muffled squeals driving him wild. “that’s it,” jay gasps, voice shaky, breath coming fast as he watches you struggle to take him, your lips stretched tight around his cock, tears welling up at the corners of your eyes. the wet, obscene sounds between you both fill the room, slick and needy, making him moan in satisfaction. "you sound so pretty like this," jay rasps, his hand tightening in your hair, controlling your movements as he thrusts deeper. “look at you, taking my cock so well… you love it, don’t you? love how filthy this is?” you try to nod, eyes rolling back as you gag slightly, the raw need in his voice only turning you on more. jay leans back, biting his lip, clearly getting off on the sight of you choking on him, watching as your throat struggles to handle his size. “you’re a fucking dream, baby,” he mutters, voice rough with lust. “you gonna let me keep fucking that pretty mouth? yeah?” he doesn’t wait for an answer. his hips move faster, his cock sliding in and out of your mouth with each thrust, more desperate, more intense with every second. you grip the sides of his thighs, nails digging into his skin as you feel him pulse in your mouth, his cock swelling as he nears the edge.
but just when you think he’s about to finish, jay abruptly pulls you off him. you cough, gasping for air, eyes tear-stained, cheeks flushed, and saliva trailing from your lips down to his cock. you barely have a moment to catch your breath before jay growls. “come here,” he demands, voice thick with urgency as he pulls you into his lap, positioning you to straddle him, knees pressing into the mattress on either side of his hips. the second your bodies connect, his mouth crashes against yours, kissing you hard, teeth scraping against your lips as his hands grip your waist, fingers digging into your skin like he can’t get enough of you. before you know it, he’s flipping you onto your back, his body hovering over you, hands roaming your skin, rough and needy. his cock presses against your entrance, teasing you as he drags the tip through your slick folds, just brushing against your core but refusing to give you what you’re aching for. “beg,” jay growls, his lips brushing your ear, breath hot against your skin as he holds himself right there, torturing you with the anticipation. “i wanna hear you beg for it.”
your body arches toward him, the heat between your legs unbearable as your voice trembles, “please, jay… fuck me.” his smirk deepens, fingers digging into your waist as he pushes in just enough to make you feel the stretch but not enough to satisfy. “not good enough,” he murmurs, voice teasing as he hovers on the edge. “tell me how bad you want it.” you whimper, nails biting into his shoulders as you gasp, “please, i need you… i need you to fuck me open, jay… i want it so bad.” he groans, the sound guttural as he slides just the tip of his cock inside, your soaked pussy immediately clenching around him. “shit,” jay mutters, inching his way in slowly, eyes locked on yours as he watches your face twist in pleasure. “didn’t think you’d be this tight, baby. you’ve been waiting for this, haven’t you?” your breath is shaky, jaw slack as he stretches you inch by inch. it’s almost too much, your fingers gripping the sheets beneath you as you struggle to adjust to his size. “jay,” you whimper, your body tensing as he bottoms out, his cock buried deep inside you. the intensity makes you yelp, your body instinctively trying to pull away.
he grips your hips tighter, holding you in place, a wicked grin spreading across his face. “where do you think you’re going?” he taunts. “thought you wanted this. wanted me to fuck you like this. you’re not running now.” “wait,” you manage to smile through the haze, breath uneven as you try to adjust to the stretch. “you’re… big.” jay’s grin widens, eyes glinting with pride. “you can take it,” he growls, rolling his hips slowly, teasing you with the slightest movements. “look at your pussy getting all stretched out for me.” your body responds immediately, legs trembling as he starts moving again, setting a rhythm that has you gasping for air, toes curling with every thrust. jay bites his lower lip, watching you struggle to take him, the sight of you barely holding on only spurring him on. he can’t help himself.
“harder?” jay chuckled, teasing, as he leaned back and adjusted his grip on the back of your thighs, spreading your legs wider. his weight pressed down on you, pinning you to the bed, completely at his mercy. your hands scrambled for something to hold onto, anything to steady yourself as the shift in position made you feel every inch of him more intensely. each deep thrust sent shockwaves through your body, forcing you to arch up, gasping for air. jay looked down at you, eyes dark with lust as he took in the sight—you, wrecked beneath him, panting, completely undone. he loved it. loved the way you looked like this, completely under him. now, with your legs spread even wider, he could feel so much more of you, every inch of your slick pussy gripping him tighter. “fuck... you feel that?” jay stuttered, his voice thick with pleasure as his pace quickened, hips slamming into you harder. “i can feel every part of you like this... shit, you’re taking me so fucking deep.” your moans were ragged, desperate, each one louder than the last as the pleasure crashed over you, your body arching off the bed with every powerful thrust. “jay... oh my god…” he smirked, watching you struggle beneath him, gripping your thighs tighter, spreading you open even more. “that’s right, baby,” he growled, his voice rough. “you’re gonna take it all... every inch of me.” you could only whimper, his pace brutal, relentless, driving you closer and closer to the edge. each thrust had you quivering, spiraling beneath him as he pounded into you, taking you apart with each stroke. “you love this, don’t you?” jay breathed, eyes burning with lust as he watched your body react to every movement. “you love being fucked like this…”
you managed a weak nod, your voice barely a whisper through the overwhelming pleasure. “yes... fuck, jay... i love it…” jungwon’s grip tightened around his cock, jerking himself off even though his stomach and thighs were already a sticky mess of cum. your panties, soaked and sticky with his release, dragged over his shaft, the fabric clinging to him as he pumped faster, his hand shaking. “fuck…” he hissed, barely able to get the word out, teeth clenched as he watched jay slam into you, each thrust harder, deeper. every sound you made almost tore him apart, his body jerking like he could feel it, like he was the one fucking you. "look at you... getting fucked dumb on his cock," jungwon’s voice cracked, bitter and desperate, a twisted mix of jealousy and arousal tearing through him. his strokes turned frantic, jerking himself harder, faster, like if he could go hard enough, fast enough, he could make it real—make it him instead of jay. his stomach clenched, head thrown back, legs trembling as he imagined it was him inside you. “you’d feel so much better with me,” he growled under his breath, his hand moving faster, frustration boiling over. “i’d fuck you better than him,” jungwon choked out, barely more than a growl. his cock throbbed in his hand as he imagined you screaming his name, wanting him the way you wanted jay. “you’d fucking see…” your moans, the way you shook, the way you screamed—jungwon was losing it. he wanted that. needed that. his body tensed as another orgasm ripped through him, spilling over the already soaked panties. jay was relentless, slamming into you so hard you could barely breathe, your entire body trembling, feeling light-headed with pleasure as you teetered on the edge of release.
jungwon could see it, could feel it in his bones. his breath hitched as he watched, hating the sight of jay inside you, filling you when it should’ve been him. “shit, your pussy’s too good,” jay grunted, his voice strained as he thrust into you harder. suddenly, he pulled out, leaving you gasping, your body aching for more, already too wound up. “not yet,” jay whispered against your lips, teasing you with the faintest brush of his mouth before pulling back. his hand tapped your thigh, commanding you to move. before you could even think, jay flipped you onto your stomach, positioning you like you were nothing more than a toy to him. his hands gripped your hips tight, lifting you the way he liked, preparing to take you all over again.
out of nowhere, jay’s hand cracked down on your ass, the sharp slap echoing through the room. you yelped, the sting rippling into a wave of pleasure that lit your body on fire. “fuck,” you whimpered, biting your lip, wanting more. “you like that?” jay’s voice was rough, dripping with lust as he knelt behind you, his hands kneading your ass before delivering another sharp smack. “look at you, already missing my cock.” your moans were muffled by the pillow, your body trembling as your hips pushed back, desperate for him to fill you again. he lined up, teasing your entrance, barely brushing against you, making you squirm. “jay, please,” you begged, voice breathless, needy. he chuckled low, letting the head of his cock tease you, dragging it along your slick folds, enough to make you squirm but never giving you what you needed. “tell me how much you want it,” he growled, his lips ghosting over your ear, his voice filled with desire. “put it back in,” you whined, pressing back against him, trying to take him in yourself. but jay only smirked, pulling away just enough to enjoy your frustration. his chest pressed against your back, his cock dragging torturously over your slick folds, teasing you without mercy. his breath was hot on your neck as he whispered, “you want it that bad?” you bit your lip, holding back, but when he nudged just the tip inside and pulled out again, your body jolted, your pride cracking. “jay, please,” you murmured, voice trembling with need, the ache between your legs growing unbearable. his dark chuckle brushed against your skin, his lips grazing your neck. “c’mon, y/n… say it,” he teased, giving you another shallow thrust, pulling back just as quickly. “you know you want it.”
your nails dug into the sheets, frustration building as your control slipped. “i want it, please,” you gasped, breath shaky. “fuck my pussy... give it to me.” his grin widened against your skin, and he pulled back just enough to line himself up, lips close to your ear. “then take it,” he growled, slamming into you hard and deep in one brutal thrust, making you scream into the pillow. “oh god—jay,” you cried, voice muffled, body shaking beneath him as his teeth sank into your shoulder, the sharp pain mixing with overwhelming pleasure. “fuck,” jay groaned, his breath ragged against your skin. “wanted to take you out on a proper date, but you had to grind on me at the club.” his voice was low, growling between each brutal thrust, the slap of skin filling the room, drowning out your desperate moans as your body quivered beneath his weight. “couldn’t help it,” you choked out, voice breaking between gasps. “you looked so fucking good.” jay’s grip on your waist tightened, his pace relentless, fucking you harder, making you scream as waves of pleasure rolled through you. “goddamn, y/n… you’re driving me fucking insane.” “i finally…” you panted, voice barely coherent, “broke you, didn’t i? you fuck like an animal.”
jay growled low, his hands gripping your hips hard enough to bruise. “maybe you did,” he muttered, voice raw with need. “look what you fucking do to me.” his words sent a shiver down your spine, pushing you closer to the edge as his thrusts became more desperate, more intense. “you wanted this,” he growled, his breath hot against your neck, his chest heavy on your back. “you wanted me like this, didn’t you?” you tried to hold back the moans, but he was so deep inside you, every thrust pushing you closer to the brink. “yes,” you gasped, nails clawing at the sheets. “yes, jay, don’t stop—keep fucking me.” his grunts grew louder, his pace brutal as he chased his release, lips brushing yours in a messy, heated kiss. his hips stuttered, rhythm faltering as he reached his limit, overwhelmed by how much you wanted him, how you took everything he gave like you were made for him. “fuck, i’m so close,” he groaned, voice strained. “gonna pull out, baby.” but you shook your head, legs wrapping tighter around him. “no,” you whispered, breathless but firm. “just—give it to me. i want all of it.” jay’s breath hitched, body trembling as he tried to hold on. “fuck, you're serious?” he rasped, control slipping. you nodded, licking your lips, urging him to let go, needing him to finish inside you.
your nails dug deeper into the sheets, your body trembling as you gasped, “don’t pull out… cum in my pussy… fill me up.” his grip tightened, his voice wrecked. “you’ll make me get you pregnant, baby,” he groaned, eyes dark with lust, staring down at you. “god, you’re fucking killing me.” you nodded, desperate, voice barely audible. “i… i’ll take care of it,” you moaned, meeting his thrusts. “just- please, inside me. you’re fucking me so good, want it—” “oh fuck, y/n,” jay growled, pushing in deep as his body shook, coming hard inside you, filling you with everything he had. “take it,” jay grunted, his voice raw, body jerking against you one last time as the heat flooded you. even as he finished, you kept grinding against him, milking every drop from him. his body trembled, his moans turning helpless as he collapsed on top of you, completely spent. “shit… stop moving, baby,” jay gasped, but even as the words left his mouth, his body couldn’t stay still, still trembling as he held you tighter, keeping himself buried deep inside you.
his breath was hot against your neck, heart pounding hard enough that you could feel it against your back. soft kisses trailed along your shoulder, his lips warm, gentle, as his body slowly came down from the high. “i’m sensitive,” jay muttered, his voice low and intimate, a softness creeping into the words as he shifted, turning both of you so you were curled into him, still connected. his cock twitched inside you, the aftershocks of his release sending shivers through his body. he held you close, arms tight around your waist, his fingers lazily tracing patterns on your skin as the two of you lay there in silence. “i’m not going anywhere,” he whispered, pressing a soft kiss to the back of your neck, his voice a quiet promise. you shifted slightly, wincing at the overstimulation, making jay groan. “ugh, that was so fucking good,” you mumbled, your voice muffled against his chest. “don’t move,” he groaned, tightening his grip on you, his arms possessive. “don’t wanna pull out yet.” you stayed tangled together, limbs entwined, the warmth of post-orgasm settling into your bones. the only sound in the room was the steady rhythm of your breathing, occasionally broken by soft laughs as you both tried to process what had just happened. jay shifted beside you, still warm, pulling you even closer as if he couldn’t stand to be apart from you. his fingers brushed lightly over your waist, and you felt your eyelids growing heavier, the peaceful haze of sleep starting to take over.
“mm, y/n?” his voice was soft, thick with sleep as he nuzzled into your neck, his breath warm against your skin. “yeah?” you mumbled, your voice hoarse. “you okay?” “just couldn’t get comfortable for a second,” he murmured, pressing a lazy kiss to your shoulder. “sorry, you can go back to sleep, baby.” the word “baby” made you smile, but you were too exhausted to tease him for it. his affection was clear, and it warmed you from the inside out. but as your mind began to wander, a nagging thought crept in—jungwon. you hadn’t heard from him since last night, and a small part of you couldn’t help but wonder where he was, if he was okay. you tried to push the thought away, but it lingered, pulling you out of the comfortable haze. “what time is it?” you asked softly, not really expecting an answer, just needing a distraction. “still early,” jay murmured, pressing his lips against your neck again. “don’t worry about it.”
you tried to relax, to let his warmth lull you back to sleep, but your mind kept circling back to jungwon. “did jungwon ever get home?” you whispered, the question slipping out before you could stop it. jay shifted beside you, his arm tightening around your waist slightly. “jungwon?” he muttered, still drowsy. “i dunno… didn’t hear him come in.” you bit your lip, unease gnawing at you. jungwon had gone out with jake and sunghoon, and usually, he would at least text if he wasn’t coming back. but your phone was somewhere on the floor, and jay had you wrapped so tightly you couldn’t reach it. still, something didn’t feel right. “he’ll be fine, y/n,” jay murmured, sensing your tension even half-asleep. his voice was soothing, but it didn’t fully ease the anxious twist in your stomach. “yeah, you’re probably right,” you whispered, though the unease remained. you snuggled back against him, trying to let the comfort of his presence calm you, but your mind kept wandering back to jungwon. jay shifted again, and this time his voice was softer, more hesitant. “y/n?” he began quietly, his breath brushing against your neck. “would you be mad if i told you i like you so fucking much?” his words snapped you out of your thoughts, your heart skipping a beat. “mad?” you turned slightly to look at him, a small smile tugging at your lips. “why would i be mad?”
he sighed, rubbing gentle circles on your side as he met your eyes. “i dunno. maybe ‘cause i’m saying it now... after we just, you know, had sex for the first time.” he chuckled awkwardly. “kinda feels like i should’ve said it before all of this.” you couldn’t help but laugh softly at his honesty, your fingers brushing lightly against his chest. “you did call me your girl earlier, remember?” you teased, easing the tension with a playful smile. he grinned, rolling his eyes. “yeah, real smooth, huh?” “so smooth,” you laughed quietly, shaking your head as the weight of the moment lifted between you. he leaned in closer, his forehead resting against yours, his voice softer now. “but seriously... i like you. a lot. more than i thought i would.” his confession made your chest warm, and your heart beat a little faster. “i like you too, jay,” you admitted, your fingers tracing patterns on his skin. “and no, i’m not mad.” relief washed over his face, and his smile widened as he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “good. ‘cause i really don’t wanna fuck this up.” “you’re not,” you whispered, leaning in to kiss him gently, reassuring him. for now, in this moment, everything between the two of you felt right—even if your mind kept drifting back to jungwon. jay sighed, content, pulling you even closer, his body relaxing against yours. but as sleep started to creep back in, that small thought of jungwon lingered in the background, refusing to let go.
jungwon slumped back in his chair, chest heaving, body drenched in sweat, his skin clammy with the aftermath of how far he'd let himself go. his heart pounded violently, each beat a reminder of the sick desperation that gripped him tighter with every passing second. no matter how many times he came tonight, it wasn’t enough. it never was. the screen had gone black minutes ago, but the sounds—the haunting echoes of your moans and jay’s grunts—played relentlessly in his mind. it felt like they were carved into his skull, on repeat, taunting him, reminding him of every moment he wasn’t there, every time jay had what he craved most. jungwon dragged a trembling hand through his hair, the strands sticking to his damp forehead, his eyes burning with unshed tears. his other hand still clutched your lingerie, the delicate lace now crumpled and soaked with his own cum. disgust surged through him as he stared at the fabric. it felt like a mockery of the connection he so desperately longed for. he let it fall from his fingers, the soft thud of it hitting the keyboard echoing like a final defeat. but the disgust didn’t make the ache in his chest any less real. it clawed at him, gnawing at his insides, threatening to tear him apart from the inside out. how long was he going to do this to himself? how long would he have to watch you give everything to jay? his teeth sank into his lip, hard enough to draw blood, the sharp taste grounding him for just a second before the agony crashed back in, stronger than ever. it wasn’t about the release—never was. the way you begged jay to fuck you harder, to cum inside you—it was a knife twisted in jungwon’s gut, over and over. “fuck…” his voice shook, barely more than a whisper. he hated himself for how much he wanted to blame you. but he couldn’t. he could never hate you, even as every part of him shattered under the weight of it all.
his body trembled, weak from the overstimulation, but his mind was a storm—each thought darker, more desperate. he pushed himself up from the chair, legs barely supporting him as he stumbled toward the bed, collapsing onto it face-first, still half-naked, pants bunched around his thighs. his cock twitched against the sheets, oversensitive and raw, but the pleasure had turned into something hollow, something meaningless. the silence of the room pressed in on him, thick and suffocating. jungwon hugged his pillow tightly, his chest rising and falling with ragged breaths, exhaustion clinging to him, but sleep felt impossibly far. his mind wouldn’t stop racing. how could he ruin this? how could he tear jay down, rip him apart, make sure he could never have you again? thoughts of revenge spiraled in his head, each one darker, more vicious than the last, but nothing felt like enough. nothing matched the depth of the emptiness he felt. he needed to break jay. he needed to make jay feel the same crushing agony that had consumed him for weeks. the same jealousy, the same suffocating helplessness. he needed to make jay feel what it was like to lose everything. with a sharp breath, jungwon slammed his fist into his chest, the impact sending a shock of pain through his ribs, but it did nothing to drown out the ache inside him. if anything, the hollow feeling only grew, spreading through his veins like poison. it wasn’t enough. “fuck!” jungwon gasped, his voice cracking, raw and broken as he punched his chest again, harder this time. his knuckles throbbed from the force, but the pain was futile—useless against the tidal wave of emotion threatening to drown him.
tears welled in his eyes, hot and unrelenting. his hands shook as he gripped his hair, pulling hard, trying to keep the sobs at bay, but it was useless. the dam broke, and a harsh, guttural sob tore from his throat. one after the other, the sobs came, his entire body shaking with the force of them. “no… no…” he whimpered between gasping breaths, the tears streaming down his face, soaking into the pillow beneath him. he had never felt so broken, so pathetic. the sobs wouldn’t stop, his entire body convulsing with each ragged cry, years of frustration, jealousy, and desperation bubbling to the surface all at once. “it’s not fair,” jungwon whimpered, his voice barely audible, choking on the words as they left his lips. “it’s not fucking fair.” “why?” he cried out, voice shattering in the darkness, trembling and fragile. he buried his face deeper into the pillow, trying to muffle the broken sobs that tore from him, but nothing could stop the flood of agony ripping him apart. the pain grew, gnawing at him, spreading through his chest like wildfire, consuming him completely. “i love you,” jungwon whispered, the words trembling, broken, and so full of hurt. “fuck, i love you so much.” but his words fell flat, lost in the empty silence of his room. they hung in the air, unanswered, just like every other desperate plea he’d made. he sobbed harder, the tears coming slower now, but no less painful, each one a bitter reminder that nothing had changed. nothing would change. he lay there for what felt like hours, broken, sobbing into the darkness, waiting for the pain to subside. but it didn’t. it lingered, sharp and unyielding, an open wound that wouldn’t heal. deep down, he knew it never would. he would never escape this.
days passed, and jungwon became nothing more than a ghost in the apartment, slipping through the cracks, disappearing into the shadows like he was made of them. you never saw him during the day, only heard the faintest shuffle of footsteps late at night, long after you’d gone to bed, when he knew you wouldn’t be around to see him. at first, you thought he wasn’t coming home at all. no signs, no sounds. it was like he’d vanished. but then, in the dead of night, there it was—the creak of a door, the quiet rustle of sheets, the almost imperceptible presence of him trying to remain unseen. he was avoiding you, and you had no idea why. it took you days to work up the courage to knock on his door. you didn’t know what you were expecting, but the silence that greeted you after your hesitant knock made the knot in your chest tighten. “jungwon? you there?” your voice was barely a whisper, pressed against the door like you were afraid of what you might hear. there was no response. just more suffocating silence. you were about to give up, about to turn away, when you heard it—the faintest rustle of movement, sheets shifting, the sound of someone deliberately staying quiet. he was there. he didn’t want to face you. "hey… you’ve been in there for days... are you okay?" you tried again, the ache in your chest making your voice softer, more desperate. nothing. no answer. the silence dragged on, the weight of it pressing down on you until you couldn’t take it anymore. eventually, you walked away, the heavy thud of your footsteps echoing through the empty hallway. the few times you did catch a glimpse of him, it was like seeing a ghost. jungwon would slip past you in the hallway, his head down, shoulders slumped, moving so quickly it was like he couldn’t get away fast enough. he wouldn’t look at you, wouldn’t even acknowledge your presence, like you weren’t there.
his face… god, his face. gaunt, hollowed out, dark circles carved beneath his eyes so deep it looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks. his lips, pale and cracked, barely held together, and his clothes hung loosely on him, like he’d stopped caring about everything—including himself. the jungwon you knew was gone, replaced by this hollow shell, this shadow of a person who had locked himself away so deep inside that you didn’t know how to find him anymore. and then there was that night. you’d woken up thirsty, stumbling into the kitchen for a glass of water, when you found him sitting at the counter. jungwon was just sitting there, staring blankly at the floor, an untouched plate of food in front of him, cold and forgotten. he didn’t move, didn’t acknowledge you when you entered. his stillness was unnerving, like he was frozen in place, trapped in a moment he couldn’t escape from. “jungwon?” you whispered, your voice trembling with concern, hoping, praying he’d respond this time. but he didn’t. he didn’t look up, didn’t flinch. he just sat there, hollow and vacant, like a ghost haunting the room, as if your presence meant nothing to him. and then, just as slowly as he’d appeared, he stood, his movements stiff and robotic, walking past you as if you weren’t even there. like you didn’t exist. for a fleeting moment, you caught a glimpse of his face—the emptiness in his eyes, the haunted look that twisted your gut with worry. it was like staring into a void, like jungwon wasn’t really there at all anymore. whatever was happening inside him, it was consuming him from the inside out, pulling him further and further away from you, into a darkness you couldn’t reach. something was horribly wrong, and no matter how hard you tried to reach him, to break through that impenetrable wall he’d built around himself, jungwon was slipping further and further away, disappearing into a place where you couldn’t follow.
you found yourself standing in front of jungwon’s door again, hand hovering over the wood, your heart pounding in your chest. this wasn’t the first time, but it felt heavier now, like there was more on the line. you hesitated, teeth sinking into your lip, before finally knocking. just like every other time, there was nothing but silence. the faint hum of the apartment’s air filled the space around you, but from behind that door, it was as if nothing existed. no movement. no sound. no acknowledgment of you.
the tightness in your chest grew, a knot of anxiety settling deep inside. you missed him. the silence, the way he was avoiding you—everything about it felt wrong, like something crucial had been ripped away. you stood there, staring at the door, chewing your lip, debating whether to walk away again, or push through the painful awkwardness. you couldn’t just leave things like this. not with him. “jungwon,” you said softly, your voice barely a whisper, fragile in the quiet hallway. “i’m... i’m worried about you. i don’t know what’s going on, but you’ve been so distant, and it’s not like you. can you please talk to me?” nothing.
the silence on the other side of the door pressed down on you, suffocating. you leaned your forehead against the wood, trying to hold back the swell of frustration and sadness building inside. why wouldn’t he just talk to you? what had changed between you two? you’d always been close, always had that connection. but now? it was like you were invisible. you exhaled shakily, deciding to try a different approach. "i’m going to tell you about my day, okay?" your voice was lighter, like you were forcing a smile even though he couldn’t see it. “i know you probably don’t care right now, but maybe if you hear me out, you’ll feel like talking to me. or at least... listen.” you leaned your body against the door, as if you could get closer to him through it. “i went to work, and it was... fine, i guess. lisa kept annoying me with her gossip, you know how she is. she tried to drag me out for drinks after, but i wasn’t feeling it.” you let out a small laugh, trying to inject some normalcy into the air, like it would remind him of what used to be easy between you two. “i know how much you hate hearing about her, but i don’t have anyone else to vent to right now, so... sorry, you’re stuck with this.”
still, silence. the ache in your chest deepened, but you kept going. “jay’s been away on a business trip. he left a few days ago... and i don’t know, it’s been harder than i thought. him being gone, and now you avoiding me... it’s making everything worse.” your voice cracked, and you hated how vulnerable you sounded, but you couldn’t help it. it was the truth. you felt so alone without jungwon and jay. you always leaned on him when things got hard, but now even he was gone, unreachable. “i miss you,” you finally admitted, voice barely above a whisper, your hand pressing flat against the door, wishing you could feel him on the other side. "i miss how we used to talk, how we’d hang out. i don’t know what happened between us, but... it’s killing me that you’re avoiding me. i just... i need my brother back." you waited, heart hammering, hoping for anything—a sound, a word, something to let you know he was still there. but there was nothing. the silence was thick and unrelenting, swallowing you whole.
your throat tightened, the feeling of helplessness wrapping itself around you. you took a deep breath, giving the door one last soft tap. "i’ll leave you alone now, but... please, jungwon. just talk to me. whenever you’re ready." you turned away, your heart heavy, each step feeling like you were sinking further into a pit. the quiet in the hallway was suffocating, and the weight of jungwon’s absence pressed down harder on you with every second that passed. you missed him, more than you could put into words. the distance between you felt impossible to bridge, and no matter how hard you tried, it only seemed to grow wider. "can you at least try to answer my texts?" you called out, voice softer now, almost pleading, desperation leaking through. you stopped in the middle of the hall, waiting, waiting for something, anything. but the silence stretched on, and the gnawing ache in your chest worsened. nothing.
not a single sound came from his room. it was like he wasn’t even there anymore. you swallowed hard, fighting the lump in your throat, your heart sinking lower with each second that passed without a response. the frustration, the sadness, the helplessness—it weighed on you like a stone, heavy and crushing. you didn’t know how to reach him anymore. you didn’t know how to bring him back. “please, jungwon,” you whispered, your voice barely audible, more to yourself than to him now. you stood there, rooted to the spot, waiting, hoping, wishing for something, anything. but all you got was the same oppressive silence that had surrounded you for days. finally, with a deep sigh, you turned away, that familiar ache settling deeper in your chest, like a hole that couldn’t be filled. each step down the hall felt heavier than the last, your mind racing with all the things you wanted to say but couldn’t. you wanted him back. you wanted your brother back. but he was slipping further away, and you didn’t know how to stop it.
you sat curled up on the couch, legs tucked beneath you, scrolling through your messages with jay. the conversation had started light, but as the texts went on, you could feel the emptiness creeping in, the sharp realization of how much you missed him gnawing at you.
you: hey... i miss you. feels kinda empty here without you jay: i miss you too, baby. just a few more days and i'll be back before you know it you: ugh, this business trip sucks. feels like forever jay: trust me, i’m counting down the days too you: you better make it up to me when you get back ;) you bit your lip, a smile tugging at the corner of your mouth as you imagined him reading that message. there was a small pause before his reply came in. jay: oh, i will. got something special planned for you. promise. you: now i’m curious... jay: you’ll have to wait and see ;) but don’t worry. it’ll be worth it.
you could practically hear the smirk in his words, and the thought made your chest flutter. as much as you hated being apart, jay always knew how to ease the ache, even if it was just through a few flirty texts. you: wish you were here though... feels off without you around jay: same here. but i’ll be back soon. promise. you: ugh, you’re so positive lol. i wish i had that right now jay: gotta keep the vibes up, babe. we’ll be fine, just a little longer. you: okay, fine... but i still hate it lol jay: you’ll survive. i’ll make it up to you, remember? you: you better...
the conversation made you smile, but the silence around you felt heavier than before. it lingered, pressing down as you stared at the screen, waiting for another response. then:
jay: i’ve got meetings for the next few hours, so i won’t be reachable, okay? you: yeah, okay. good luck, don’t work too hard jay: i’ll try. talk soon, love you. you: love you too. you sighed, putting your phone down, staring at the empty room. jay was right—you’d see him soon—but that didn’t stop the ache. the apartment felt hollow without him, and worse, jungwon was barely speaking to you. what if jungwon was still acting distant when jay came back? maybe jay could help. maybe he’d get jungwon to open up. but for now, you were left alone in the quiet. you chewed on your nail absentmindedly, eyes flicking to the screen, but the movie playing was just background noise, something to fill the silence. after a few moments, you reached for your phone again, scrolling through the unanswered texts you’d sent to jungwon. the long thread of messages, one after another, stared back at you, and each unread line made your heart sink further.
you: hey, you haven’t left your room in days? you: seriously, jungwon, what’s going on? you: are you mad at me? i just want to talk. you: please answer me.
not a single response. you frowned, the tightness in your chest growing, frustration mixing with the sadness that had been building for days. why wouldn’t he just talk to you? part of you wanted to give him space, let him come to you when he was ready, but the longer he stayed away, the more it hurt. with a deep sigh, you opened up another message. you: look, i don’t know what’s going on, but i hate this distance between us. if you need space, fine, but at least let me know you’re okay. you hesitated, staring at the screen, your thumb hovering over the send button. would he even read this? you hit send anyway, the weight of the unsaid words pressing on your chest. after a moment, you typed one last message. you: if you want to talk or just hang out... my door’s open. come to my room if you feel like it. you set your phone down, the silence of the apartment swallowing you whole. without the distraction of the TV, the quiet was deafening, making the emptiness feel so much more real. you glanced at your phone one last time, hoping—wishing—for a reply, but there was nothing. not even a sign that he’d read your messages.
with a soft sigh, you turned off the TV and made your way to your room. the bed creaked softly as you dropped onto it, pulling the blankets around you. your phone lay on the nightstand, screen dark and still, the silence hanging heavy around you. you left the door cracked open, just in case. the apartment was too still, and jungwon’s absence weighed on you like a physical thing. you lay there, staring up at the ceiling, eyes heavy with exhaustion, but sleep didn’t come easily. it was a restless kind of feeling, the kind that left you half-awake, waiting for something that might never come.
and then, the bed dipped. you jolted awake, heart slamming against your ribcage, the remnants of sleep still clouding your vision. you blinked, eyes adjusting to the dim light, and there he was—jungwon. sitting at the edge of your bed, his back turned to you, his posture rigid. “jesus, you fucking scared me,” you muttered, trying to steady the pounding in your chest. he didn’t move, didn’t acknowledge your words. just sat there, like a statue, head bowed, shoulders tense. something was off—really off—and the heavy silence that hung between you only made it worse. you noticed the door was closed. when had that happened? the stillness of the room felt suffocating now, like the air itself was thick with everything left unsaid.
hesitant, you reached out, placing a hand gently on his back. the moment your palm touched him, you felt him flinch, his body reacting to the contact like it was a jolt of electricity. but he didn’t pull away. he stayed there, frozen, his breath catching in his throat before it escaped in a deep, shaky exhale. “please,” you whispered, voice so soft it was almost swallowed by the tension in the room, “don’t shut me out. i miss you.” the words seemed to snap something inside him. jungwon turned his head sharply, eyes wide, and for the first time in a long while, you could see everything—all of it. the raw, unfiltered emotion that he’d been hiding. his eyes shimmered with unshed tears, and though he blinked quickly, trying to hold them back, it was too late. you’d seen the truth. you could feel the hurt radiating from him, almost palpable. “you… miss me?” his voice cracked, disbelief laced in every syllable, as if the very idea of you missing him was foreign, impossible. there was something raw, almost desperate, flickering in his gaze, something that made your heart clench painfully in your chest.
you nodded, your throat tightening, the emotions between you thickening. how had you not noticed? how had you let it get this bad? “wow…” jungwon muttered, running a trembling hand through his hair, visibly trying to keep himself from falling apart. but it was clear he was on the edge, barely holding on. his emotions swirled around him, chaotic and heavy, and you could feel the weight of it pressing on you too. “you just say that, and suddenly… i want to be okay again.” his voice wavered, a bitter laugh bubbling up from deep within him. “isn’t that pathetic?” the laugh was sharp, almost cutting, but beneath it was something so much more fragile, something that hurt to hear.
“what are you talking about?” you whispered, your heart breaking for him in ways you couldn’t quite grasp. his words, his tone—they didn’t match the jungwon you knew. this wasn’t the boy you’d grown up with, the boy who had always been so full of quiet strength. this was someone drowning, lost in emotions that were too big for him to carry alone. without a second thought, you moved closer, your hands gently tugging him toward you. “come here,” you said softly, your voice both an invitation and a plea. you guided him away from the edge, pulling him into you. and this time, he didn’t resist. he let you pull him close, his head resting against your shoulder, his body curling into yours like it had so many times when you were kids, like he was searching for that comfort, that familiarity. your heart swelled, a bittersweet warmth spreading through your chest as you held him. you remembered the times you’d fall asleep together, mid-movie, or after long days spent together. but this... this was different. his breathing was shaky, his body trembling slightly against yours, and you could feel the storm of emotions inside him.
and yet, something else lingered, something that made the air around you feel thicker, heavier. “but you’ll hate me,” he whispered, so quietly you almost didn’t catch it. his voice was so vulnerable, trembling with fear, with something you couldn’t quite place. “hate you?” you echoed, your fingers brushing through his hair gently as you tried to soothe him, tried to understand. “why would i ever hate you?” he didn’t answer right away. his face was still pressed against your chest, but you could feel the shift in him, the tension building. when he finally pulled back to look at you, his eyes were filled with an intensity that made your breath catch.
tears clung to his lashes, but there was something more, something darker in his gaze. his eyes flickered down to your lips, lingering there for a heartbeat too long. your heart stuttered in your chest, a sense of unease washing over you. the closeness between you suddenly felt different, charged in a way that made your stomach twist. “jungwon?” you whispered, your voice barely more than a breath, the question heavy in the air between you. but before you could process the meaning behind his gaze, before you could move or speak again, his grip on your shirt tightened, pulling you even closer. his face was inches from yours now, and then, suddenly, his lips were on yours—soft, shaky, unsure, but insistent. it wasn’t what you expected. it wasn’t what you wanted. but it was happening.
your heart pounded in your chest, panic rising as the kiss fully registered. you pulled away quickly, your breath coming in shallow gasps, hands pushing against him. "what are you doing? stop—no, we can’t!" your voice trembled, desperate to make sense of the overwhelming rush of emotions. but jungwon didn’t stop. his eyes, wide and filled with something raw and unrecognizable, bore into yours. there was a desperation in them, something pleading, frantic. “please, y/n, just listen—” he leaned in again, his voice almost breaking. “no!” you cried, pressing harder against his chest, trying to create space between you. your hands shook as you tried to shove him back, your mind screaming at you that this wasn’t right. “this isn’t right, jungwon! we can’t—”
“but you kissed me back,” he interrupted, his voice cracking as he held your gaze, the hurt in his eyes twisting painfully in your chest. “i know you felt it too. you didn’t pull away right away. you liked it, didn’t you?” his words hit you like a punch, leaving you reeling, the confusion swirling inside you tightening like a knot. “no, i didn’t—” you stammered, shaking your head, trying to shake off the weight of his accusation. how did this even happen? “please,” he whispered, his voice breaking, and before you could react, he leaned in again, his desperation bleeding into every movement. his lips crashed against yours with a force that left you breathless, his tongue forcing its way into your mouth with an intensity that made your head spin. you struggled, hands pushing at him, but his strength overpowered yours. the more you resisted, the harder he pressed, the kiss turning more frantic, more overwhelming. you told yourself to push him away, to stop this before it went any further, but your body… your body wasn’t listening. it froze, paralyzed in the whirlwind of emotions crashing over you. the heat of his touch, the urgency of his kiss—it blurred everything else. for a split second, nothing else existed. it was just his lips, desperate and pleading, and the dizzying sense of wrongness mixing with the confusion in your mind. then, you felt it. his hands slipping under your shirt, fingers grazing the bare skin of your stomach, sending a jolt through you like a cold shock of reality. the haze shattered.
you gasped, pulling away, the air in your lungs burning as the weight of the situation hit you like a ton of bricks. this wasn’t just a kiss anymore. this was something far deeper, something you weren’t ready for. before you could fully react, jungwon moved over you, his body pressing you down into the mattress, caging you beneath him. his weight pinned you in place, his arms braced on either side of your head, trapping you. he kissed you again, more frantic this time, his desperation growing with every second that passed. “jungwon, stop,” you tried to say, but the words barely made it out, muffled by his lips, by the weight of everything that was happening too fast, too intensely. the room felt smaller, closing in around you as his kisses became more urgent, his hands wandering with a hunger that made your skin crawl. you needed to stop this. you had to stop this. but he wasn’t stopping.
"please," jungwon’s voice cracked as he pulled back, a thin trail of saliva connecting your lips, his eyes wide with desperation. "i need you... i need this. don’t leave me alone… not like this.
and then you felt it—his hips pressing against yours, the hard outline of his cock rubbing insistently against your thigh. your body froze, shock rippling through every inch of you. he was so hard, the pressure of him grinding into you undeniable, suffocating. your breath hitched as you felt his desperation, his need, pressing into you like a weight you couldn’t shake. you hated it—the way your skin flushed under his touch, how your body reacted, betraying you. and the look on his face—pained, desperate, so full of need—made it harder to pull away. it made everything harder. his movements became more determined, the friction between you building with each desperate grind of his hips. his head fell back, a low groan tearing from his lips, his jaw slack as if he was already lost to the sensation. his eyes fluttered shut, and just the sight of him like this—grinding against you, looking like he could cum just from that alone—had you crumbling. "wait—" you breathed, voice barely a whisper, trying to regain control, but your own breath was coming in short, uneven gasps, mirroring the intensity he was pressing onto you. it was too much. he was too much. and worst of all—you didn’t completely hate it. and that terrified you.
"please, let me," jungwon begged, his voice rough, full of raw emotion. his eyes burned into yours, overwhelming, trapping you beneath his gaze. his lips trembled as he kissed you again, softer this time, like he was asking for permission with each touch, pleading with you to let him keep going. "i can't," you managed to whisper, shaking your head, trying to fight through the fog of his touch, but your body felt weak, pinned beneath his weight. "you were kissing me back," jungwon insisted, his voice hardening as his lips hovered dangerously close to yours, his breath hot against your skin. “you liked it. don’t deny it.”
"no, jungwon, i—" your voice faltered, struggling to form words, but he pressed his forehead against yours, eyes locking onto yours with a fierce intensity that made it hard to breathe. "you were," he repeated, his hands cupping your face, his fingers trembling against your skin. "stop lying to yourself, y/n." his words twisted inside your chest, sending your thoughts spiraling. the confusion, the guilt—it all mixed with the undeniable pull of the moment, the years of repressed feelings now breaking free, crashing down around you in waves too strong to resist. "this isn’t right," you whispered, your hands gripping his shirt, half trying to push him away, half holding him closer. you were torn, the weight of the situation crashing into the undeniable connection between you.
"but it feels right, doesn’t it?" jungwon murmured, his lips finding yours again, kissing you deeply, slowly, like he was savoring the taste of you, as if this was his last chance. you gasped into the kiss, your hands sliding down to his chest, and for a fleeting moment, you let yourself kiss him back, fully aware of the line you were crossing. but as soon as you did, the weight of reality slammed into you, and you pulled away, breathless, shaking your head. jungwon’s eyes darkened as he hovered over you, his hands roaming your sides, fingers slipping under your shirt, grazing your bare skin. "you don’t hate it,” he whispered, his voice low, dangerous, “i can feel it."
his words slithered into your mind, clouding your thoughts, blurring the lines you had promised yourself you’d never cross. his touch—too close, too much—made you tremble, and the way he looked at you... it was dangerous. your heart pounded in your chest, a frantic beat of fear and something you didn’t want to admit. "this isn’t right... jay—" you started, your voice cracking under the weight of it all, but as soon as you said jay’s name, jungwon’s expression hardened, his jaw clenching. "he's not here. i am." his voice was sharp, final, as he leaned in, dragging his tongue slowly up your neck, making your body shudder involuntarily. "doesn’t it feel good?” his hands roamed rougher now, his fingers sneaking further under your shirt, brushing against your skin with a hunger that was impossible to ignore. “i can make you feel so fucking good... you know i’m right."
his tongue flicked over your ear, making your breath catch in your throat, your gasp betraying you. his mouth moved down to your neck, sucking hard, marking you in a way that made your stomach twist with both guilt and something darker.
you pushed weakly at his shoulders, your hands trembling, but he was stronger, catching your wrists and pinning them down as his mouth continued its slow, torturous path down your body. his nose brushed against your shirt as he lifted it slightly, his tongue dragging in slow, teasing stripes along your stomach like he was savoring every second. you arched into the sensation, a broken moan slipping from your lips, and jungwon groaned in response, the sound of your pleasure spurring him on. just as you felt yourself slipping further, the image of jay flashed in your mind, cold and sobering. jungwon noticed immediately, his eyes snapping up to yours, his expression darkening as he read your thoughts before you could even voice them. "no, no," he whispered, moving back up to your lips, kissing you again, desperate to keep you from pulling away. "you're thinking about him again, aren’t you?" his breath was hot against your ear, his frustration bleeding into his words. “but you’re my brother…” the words slipped out, weak and trembling, as you tried to grasp onto some semblance of reality, something to hold onto, some line that shouldn’t be crossed. your chest tightened, the weight of everything crashing down on you as you looked at him—jungwon, the boy you had grown up with, the person who should have been your safety, your boundary.
jungwon froze for a split second, his eyes locking onto yours, and for a moment, you saw something break inside him—a flash of vulnerability that shattered the hardness in his expression. but it was gone as quickly as it came. his grip on your waist tightened, like he was afraid you’d slip away from him, like losing you was a possibility he couldn’t bear. "i never wanted to be," he whispered, his voice raw, and those five words hit you like a blow to the chest. there was no hesitation, no regret, only a desperate need. his lips found yours again, softer this time but still so urgent, so desperate. he kissed you like he was trying to erase your words, trying to make you forget everything—your boundaries, jay, and the storm of emotions that surrounded you both. your eyes squeezed shut, your entire body trembling as his lips moved against yours. but even as you tried to pull away, he wouldn’t let you retreat. “look at me,” he whispered, his voice shaky yet filled with quiet authority, a plea buried deep within the demand. “please, y/n. look at me.” you kept your eyes shut tight, resisting, clinging to whatever was left of your resolve. “i can’t… i can’t do this to jay,” you breathed, voice barely holding together as you tried to escape the hold jungwon had over you. but jungwon wasn’t stopping. he kissed along your neck, slow, deliberate, each kiss sending a jolt through your body. “jay doesn’t have to know,” he murmured between kisses, his breath hot and ragged against your skin, the warmth of him wrapping around you like a suffocating blanket.
his lips trailed up your cheek, his hands cradling your face with such tenderness it made your heart ache. the contrast of his desperation and his soft touch was overwhelming. he bit down on your bottom lip, gently but firm enough to make you gasp, and before you could stop yourself, a low moan slipped out. he paused at the sound, and in that split second, you felt everything shift. he saw it—the way you were faltering, the way your body was betraying you. “see?” he whispered, his lips hovering inches from yours, his breath mingling with yours. “you want this too.” "he’s not here, y/n. jay doesn’t have to know," jungwon repeated, but this time his voice cracked, and you could hear the rawness in it—the pain, the need. "i’m right here. i’ve always been here." "no..." you whispered weakly, but even you weren’t sure if you believed it anymore. jungwon’s hand slipped down, his fingers sliding under your waistband, finding your soaked core. you gasped, your body betraying you again as his fingers teased you, slipping inside slowly. he groaned softly, his lips curling into a dark smirk as he felt how wet you were. "then why are you so wet for me?" his voice was low, dangerous, as he pushed deeper. "fuck, you’re soaked... all for me."
you whimpered, your body arching into him, even as your mind screamed at you to stop. "why?" you choked out, your voice trembling, your eyes pleading for answers. "why are you doing this?" jungwon pulled his fingers out, bringing them to his mouth, sucking them clean with a groan that sent a shiver down your spine. his eyes locked on yours, full of raw emotion—something deeper, something darker. "because i love you." his confession hung in the air, heavy and suffocating. you stared at him, your heart pounding, your breath catching in your throat as the weight of his words sank in. you hadn’t realized, you hadn’t seen it, hadn’t felt it before. but now? now everything made sense. "jungwon..." you whispered, your hands weakly gripping his shirt, the guilt and confusion twisting tighter around you. "i didn’t know... i didn’t realize..." "you never saw me," he whispered, his voice barely holding together, his lips just inches from yours. the sadness in his eyes was unbearable, cutting through you like a knife. "not the way i needed you to. but i’ve seen you, every single day. every second. i’ve loved you, y/n. even when it fucking hurt, even when i tried to stay away. but i can’t anymore."
his words hit you like a tidal wave, the full force of his heartbreak crashing into you. you could feel it now—the years of silent suffering, the way he’d watched from the shadows, wanting you, needing you, and you never even noticed. it tore at you, unraveling everything you thought you knew. "i... i don’t know what to say," you stammered, your mind spinning, everything unraveling at once. guilt, confusion, and the weight of his confession pressed down on you, suffocating, leaving you gasping for air. "you don’t have to say anything... just let me have you," he whispered, his voice breaking as he leaned in, brushing his lips against yours, soft and hesitant, like he was scared you’d push him away again. "that’s all i’m asking."
his forehead rested against yours, his body trembling as he held you close, his breath uneven, each second stretching out painfully. there was no more hiding. this was him—raw, broken, vulnerable—and he was asking for everything. the guilt hit you hard, like a wave pulling you under. you knew, deep down, that this wasn’t just lust for him. this was years of repressed feelings, of unspoken love, of obsession. he had loved you in silence for so long, and now he was laying it all out in front of you, begging for just a moment of validation, for you to see him. and as you stared into his tear-streaked eyes, you couldn’t deny it anymore. you couldn’t pretend. there had been something between you, once, twice... maybe more times than you wanted to admit. and now, with everything out in the open, it was all crashing down on you. you couldn’t look away. you couldn’t push him away. he was too close, too raw, and every second you stayed, every breath you shared, the line between right and wrong blurred even more. "please," he whispered again, his voice so broken, so full of everything he’d held inside for so long. and as his lips brushed yours again, you felt yourself slipping, falling into him, into the years of unspoken desire and love that had always been there, waiting for you to see it.
"jungwon..." your voice cracked, tears welling up in your eyes. "i’m sorry. i’m so fucking sorry."
the words barely had a chance to settle before you kissed him. your lips crashed into his, the storm of emotions inside you spilling over, unable to hold back any longer. jungwon froze for a split second, his breath hitching, and then he was on you, kissing you back with a desperation that made your heart ache. he groaned against your mouth, his body trembling like this was the moment he’d been waiting for his entire life. and maybe, in his mind, it was. his hands clamped down on your waist, fingers digging into your skin, pulling you so close that you could barely breathe. his kiss was everything—years of longing, of frustration, heartbreak—all spilling out at once. and now that you were kissing him back, now that he had you, it was like something inside him was breaking apart and being put back together at the same time.
he kissed you like it was his last chance, like he was drowning and this was his only way to breathe. his tongue slid into your mouth, greedy, devouring every sound you made, groaning deep in his chest like this was everything he had ever wanted. the meaningless girls, the distractions, none of it had ever come close to this. you were all he had ever wanted. his touch ignited something in you too—something raw, something you’d buried deep. your body responded to him, the heat of his hands on your skin setting your nerves on fire, and you couldn’t help but kiss him deeper, harder.
his lips trailed down to your neck, biting, sucking, marking you, and with every gasp that escaped your mouth, he lost a little more control. "fuck," jungwon groaned, his breath hot against your skin as his hands slipped under your shirt, his touch rough, frantic. he was losing himself in you, piece by piece, every touch unraveling something inside him that had been locked away for too long.
and now, now that he had you, he wasn’t sure if he could ever let go. his fingers grazed your skin, and you arched into him, your body betraying you with a soft gasp that only spurred him on. his grip tightened, and the kiss deepened, his need pouring into you, relentless. he tugged at your shirt, your clothes, desperate to feel more of you, to claim more of you. he had waited so long for this moment—watched for so long. the fantasies, the dreams, the nights spent watching you from a distance, imagining this. nothing compared to the reality of having you beneath him, of hearing your moans, of feeling your body give in to his touch. his breath caught as he realized—you were giving in. you wanted him. your hands gripped at his shirt, pulling him closer, and it was like a switch flipped in him. his lips curled into a smirk against your skin as he kissed you harder, his movements growing more aggressive, more possessive.
oh. yes.
you gasped, breathless, as his lips pressed harder against yours, his hips grinding against you. this was what he had wanted all along, what he had craved. his cock was hard, straining against his clothes, and he groaned into your mouth, his fingers digging into your waist, his grip possessive, as if he was afraid you’d disappear. "fuck," he breathed, his voice low, dangerous, his lips brushing your ear. "you don’t know how long i’ve waited for this." his hips pressed into yours, grinding slowly, teasingly, his fingers slipping down to tug at your shorts. "hurry," you gasped, your breath shaky and uneven, the urgency in your voice sending a thrill through him. his body stilled for a moment, his eyes darkening, a twisted smirk playing on his lips as he kissed along your neck. "oh, that’s it," he muttered, his voice deep, rough. "so eager. so fucking eager." his teeth sank into your skin, harder this time, bruising. it wasn’t just a bite; it was a claim. his hands moved with purpose now, one pinning your wrists above your head, the other pulling at your clothes, his grip tight, possessive. you were his, and he was going to make sure you knew it. the darkness in him started to bleed through, inch by inch. his touches grew rougher, his kisses more frantic. he was unraveling before your eyes, losing control, losing himself in you.
his hips rocked harder against yours, the friction sending shockwaves through you, another moan tearing from your throat. but something was shifting in him—something darker, something that made you shudder beneath him. he was losing himself, bit by bit, and he wasn’t going to stop. "fuck," he growled, his breath hot against your neck, his voice filled with raw need. "you don’t know what you’ve done to me. i’ve been waiting... waiting so fucking long." his hips pressed harder into you, rougher, the tension between you unbearable now. his grip on your wrists tightened, pinning you harder against the bed, and you could feel it—the desperation, the obsession, the years of longing finally boiling over. "i’m not letting you go," jungwon muttered, his voice dark, a promise that made your stomach twist. his lips crashed against yours again, his kiss a mix of need and frustration, his control slipping further and further away.
"you think jay could ever make you feel like this?" jungwon hissed into your ear, his breath hot and jagged, the words slicing through the air like a challenge. his voice was low, darker than you had ever heard it, filled with a jealousy and possessiveness that sent a shiver down your spine. the roughness of his movements took you by surprise, the sudden intensity catching you off guard. a thrill shot through you at the way he was taking control, but the mention of jay—your boyfriend, miles away—sent a wave of guilt crashing through you. then you looked up at jungwon. really looked at him. his face was twisted, contorted in a way you’d never seen before. the softness you had always known was gone, replaced by something unrecognizable. his eyes burned with an intensity that bordered on madness, a wild, unhinged hunger that seemed to consume him. your heart pounded in your chest, a mix of fear and something far more dangerous tightening in your stomach. this wasn’t the boy you knew. this was something else, something darker, and yet the way he dominated you, the way he held you down, had you teetering on the edge of wanting more. "he couldn’t even eat you out after you gave him the suck of his life." jungwon’s voice was sharp, almost mocking, but laced with something more sinister, something dangerous.
your eyes flew open at his words, panic rising in your chest. how did he know? your voice trembled as you spoke, "what? how do you know that?" the room felt like it was closing in on you, the tension suffocating. no one should have known, no one could have seen or heard that moment. your breath hitched as fear crept up your spine. jungwon's smirk deepened, his eyes gleaming with something dark, something you couldn’t place. he leaned in closer, his body pressing harder against yours. "i know everything, y/n," he whispered, his voice low and chilling, his gaze locking onto yours with a twisted sense of satisfaction. it was like he was savoring your fear, relishing in the control he had over you. you tried to pull away, panic tightening in your chest, but jungwon’s grip only grew stronger. in one swift motion, he yanked your shorts down, making you yelp, the action so rough it left you breathless. "you didn’t think i’d just sit back and let him have you, did you?" his voice was taunting now, a cruel edge to his words. "i’ve been watching. every little thing."
the reality of his words slammed into you, and your heart raced with panic. watching? how? "w-what do you mean? how?" you stammered, your voice barely above a whisper as his weight pressed you deeper into the mattress, keeping you pinned beneath him. jungwon straddled you, his eyes dark and unreadable, but there was something more there now, something sinister lurking just beneath the surface. your heart pounded as his hands grabbed the hem of your shirt, tugging it up roughly to reveal your bra. before you could react, he snapped one of the straps against your skin, the sting sharp, causing you to gasp. your body reacted against your will, a flush of heat rising under your skin. "wouldn't you like to know?" jungwon's smirk grew, his eyes dancing with dark amusement, like this was all a game to him—a twisted, dangerous game that only he understood. fear and confusion clouded your thoughts, but there was something else there, something darker stirring inside you. despite the fear, the way he had complete control over you—his dominance, the weight of his body trapping you—had your pulse quickening in ways you didn’t expect. "jungwon, i’m not fucking around," you snapped, your voice shaky but firm, trying to mask the panic that was threatening to overtake you. your hands pushed against his chest, but he was unmovable, his body keeping you pinned beneath him, helpless.
"how were you watching?" you demanded, the question barely leaving your lips as your breath hitched. you needed to know, needed to understand what was happening. jungwon’s smirk didn’t waver. in fact, it seemed to grow darker. he leaned in, his lips brushing against your ear, his voice a low, taunting whisper. "i have my ways." the words sent a chill down your spine, his tone dripping with arrogance. his hips shifted, pressing harder against you, reminding you just how trapped you were. your breath caught as his fingers trailed down your stomach, the heat of his touch setting off a reaction in your body that you didn’t want to acknowledge. "you’re so curious," he teased, his voice growing darker, more dangerous. "but maybe you should focus on how you’re feeling right now." "you’re getting wetter, aren’t you?" he taunted, his voice low, dripping with satisfaction. your body betrayed you, reacting to his dominance, the way he controlled every moment, every touch. anger flared up, but it was mixed with something else—something you couldn’t shake, something primal and terrifying. and the worst part? he wasn’t wrong.
your body heated under his touch, despite the fear clawing at the edges of your mind. every part of you wanted to scream, wanted to fight back, but you were frozen, pinned beneath him, powerless. and jungwon? he saw it all. he saw your hesitation, your fear, the way your body responded to him. his smirk widened, his eyes gleaming with dark satisfaction as he watched you unravel beneath him. "he couldn’t give you this," he muttered, his lips grazing your neck, his teeth nipping at your skin, his breath hot and ragged. "he could never make you feel like this." his words were venomous, biting, but they sank into your skin, embedding themselves in your thoughts. you wanted to hate him, to push him away, but with every touch, every word, he was pulling you deeper into his world. "answer me," you spat, trying to steady your voice, but it wavered, betraying the whirlwind of confusion inside you. jungwon’s reaction wasn’t what you expected. instead of answering, he laughed, low and dark, his hands sliding back up to your bra, tugging at the fabric with a casual cruelty.
"oh, i’ve been watching you for a long time, y/n," he murmured, his eyes gleaming with something dangerous, something far beyond what you thought you knew of him. "all those times you thought you were alone… you weren’t." his words sent a chill crawling down your spine, your breath hitching in your throat. this wasn’t some sudden madness; this had been brewing inside him for longer than you realized. his fingers moved swiftly, unhooking your bra and tossing it aside like it meant nothing. his eyes darkened as he stared at your exposed chest, a satisfied moan slipping from his lips like he’d finally gotten what he’d been craving. without hesitation, his mouth latched onto one of your nipples, sucking hungrily, possessively. the heat of his mouth sent shockwaves through you, your body arching into him before your mind could catch up to what was happening. “knew these tits were perfect,” he mumbled between rough kisses and bites, his voice thick with arousal. his hands bunched your breasts together, squeezing as his tongue flicked between them. the intensity overwhelmed you, your skin heating under his touch, the sensation building into something you couldn’t control. before you could even catch your breath, his lips crashed back onto yours, demanding, relentless. his kiss was rough, desperate, like he couldn’t get enough of you, and despite the confusion clouding your thoughts, you found yourself kissing him back, matching his need with your own.
but even as your body responded to his touch, your mind was spinning—caught between the heat of the moment and the sickening realization that something was deeply, deeply wrong. jungwon pulled back just enough to smirk, his thumb brushing over your swollen bottom lip, teasing you. "you’re still trying to figure this out, aren’t you?" he whispered, his voice soft but full of twisted control. "tell me, won," you demanded, trying to push through the fog of your mind, daring him to either stop or take things further. your pulse quickened as you spoke, hating how your voice faltered. his eyes narrowed, something dark flickering in his expression, but there was a glint of excitement too, as if he enjoyed the fact that you were pushing back, not just giving in. it only fueled the twisted hunger burning inside him, made him want to tear you apart even more. your heart pounded harder as your body betrayed you, your pussy growing wetter with each passing second, reacting to the way he looked down at you—confident, knowing. like he had you right where he wanted, like he’d always known exactly how to break you down. "i know how you hated how bad jeongin was at eating you out," jungwon’s voice dripped with amusement, his eyes never leaving yours, "but you forgave him, didn’t you? because he was cute." your body froze, how did he know that? your heart raced, panic bubbling up inside you, but jungwon leaned in, his breath hot against your skin. "how?" you asked, your voice trembling with disbelief, your mind racing to piece together the puzzle. but jungwon didn’t stop. his fingers moved between your legs, slipping through your slick folds effortlessly, and a sharp hiss escaped his lips as he felt how wet you were for him.
"fuck," he groaned, pulling his fingers to his mouth, sucking them clean with a satisfaction that sent shivers through your entire body. his cock strained against his pants, the bulge pressing hard against you, reminding you what was coming next. "and kai," he continued, his voice dripping with that same twisted smirk, "you hated how he made you swallow his cum, didn’t you? because it tasted gross." he was revealing things no one should know, secrets you had buried deep. you squirmed beneath him, your mind reeling. how did he know these intimate details? things you never told anyone, not even your closest friends. his hand slid back between your legs, his fingers teasing your clit, rubbing slow circles as you struggled to stay in control. "but here you are," he murmured, his voice low, full of twisted satisfaction, "so fucking wet for me." "you pervert," you spat, but your voice lacked the bite you wanted it to have. your body was betraying you, responding to his touch even as your mind screamed that this was wrong. "were you listening in on me? when i was talking to yuna?" the memories of those conversations, those private confessions you had shared with your friend, rushed back to you. the thought of him listening in, lurking, sent a wave of nausea through you.
jungwon’s smirk grew darker, more twisted. "every word," he whispered, his fingers working your clit faster, his voice laced with a sick satisfaction. "while you thought you were alone, spilling your secrets to yuna, i was right there. hearing everything."
his free hand came down on your breasts, slapping them just enough to make them bounce, before gripping one firmly, his tongue licking his lips sinfully. he was savoring every reaction, every shudder of your body beneath him. "but i bet you're dying to know how." jungwon’s voice was low, teasing, as he toyed with you, his fingers slipping inside you again, deeper this time. your slick coated his knuckles as he pumped in and out, your body betraying you completely. "how?" you whispered, your breath shaky, barely able to form the words. the pressure between your legs was building, each stroke pushing you closer to the edge despite the horror of what he was saying. without warning, jungwon pulled away, leaving you gasping for breath, your body trembling with need. he stood up, quickly tugging his shirt off, revealing his toned chest. your eyes followed the movement.
you sat up slightly, your eyes locked on his body. "just tell me how?" you asked again, more urgently this time. "does it really matter?" he growled, his breath hot against your ear. his body pressed down on yours, heavy and dominant, as he rocked his hips against you, letting you feel the full hardness of his cock through his pants. "you’re here, pussy dripping," jungwon's voice was dripping with twisted satisfaction, his eyes gleaming with something darker, more manic, as he watched you squirm beneath him. "about to fuck your stepbrother." his words hung in the air like a confession, dark and sinister, and you realized—he had been watching you, listening, lurking in the shadows for far longer than you ever could have imagined. jungwon moved, pushing off the bed to stand for a brief second before he settled back down, lying flat against the mattress. his eyes, dark and unrelenting, never left yours, watching every breath, every flicker of hesitation that crossed your face. the weight of his gaze felt like a physical force, pinning you in place.
"come here," he whispered, his voice low and dangerous, his lips curling into a smirk that sent a shiver down your spine. his head rested against the pillow, one hand lazily trailing down his chest, teasing himself, as if he had all the time in the world. "sit on my face, y/n. maybe then i’ll tell you everything." "you’re fucking insane," you spat, your voice trembling slightly as you tried to keep some semblance of control. but even as the words left your mouth, you could feel the heat between your legs, the undeniable ache that had been building ever since his hands had been on you. jungwon didn’t flinch. if anything, his smirk deepened, that dark amusement dancing in his eyes. "maybe," he admitted, his tone almost casual, like he was discussing the weather. "but i’m a man of my word. i’m not going to let you get all wet like this and not take responsibility for it."
his voice dropped lower, more commanding, as his hand slid lower, trailing down to his pants, his fingers teasing the waistband. "or would you rather stop this now?" he challenged, his eyes locked on yours, daring you to make the choice. "because i’ll stop if you want me to." you sat frozen, your mind screaming at you to walk away, to leave before it was too late, but your body… your body wanted something else. your pulse quickened, heat pooling low in your stomach as jungwon’s eyes stayed fixed on yours, waiting, anticipating. "come on, y/n," jungwon whispered, his voice taking on that seductive edge, his body shifting, as if inviting you in. "you know you don’t want this to stop." he licked his lips, his tongue flicking out slowly, teasingly. "you want it. just admit it." "you’re such a fucking asshole," you muttered, your voice low, barely above a whisper, but your legs were already moving, your body acting before your mind could catch up.
jungwon’s smirk widened, his eyes gleaming with triumph as he watched you, his hands sliding up to rest on your thighs as you straddled him, your body trembling with anticipation. "yeah?" he murmured, his voice rough and thick with desire. "but i’m your fucking asshole, aren’t i?" the second you settled over him, hovering just above his face, jungwon’s hands tightened on your thighs, pulling you down slowly, his breath hot against your core. "that’s it," he whispered, his voice low and dark, sending a thrill through you. "you’re gonna ride my face, and i’ll tell you everything you want to know." you hesitated for just a second, the last flicker of doubt crossing your mind, but then his tongue flicked out, teasing the edge of your folds, and the hesitation melted away in an instant. your head fell back, a soft gasp escaping your lips as the heat of his mouth sent a jolt of pleasure through your body. "fuck," you whispered, your fingers curling into his soft hair as jungwon’s tongue slid between your folds, teasing and tasting you. flicking your clit, tracing circles on it. his grip on your thighs tightened, holding you firmly in place as he licked deeper, groaning softly against your skin. your body trembled, every nerve on fire as jungwon worked you with expert precision, his tongue moving in slow, then picking up. the intensity of it all—the heat, the sensation, the control—was overwhelming, consuming you completely. and just when you thought you couldn’t take any more, jungwon pulled back slightly, his breath hot against your core as he whispered, "you taste fucking perfect."
your breath hitched, your heart racing in your chest as his words sank in, sending a fresh wave of heat crashing through you. his tongue returned with renewed intensity, his hands gripping your thighs tighter, pulling you down harder against his face, making it impossible to think, impossible to breathe. he was relentless, and you were lost. "tell me," you gasped, your voice shaky, barely holding together as his tongue worked you over and over again. "tell me everything." jungwon groaned against you, the vibration sending shockwaves through your body as he looked up at you, his eyes dark, filled with something dangerous, something wild. "after i make you cum, baby," he whispered, his voice low and rough, his fingers digging into your skin as he pulled you even closer. "then i'll tell you everything." and you knew, as the pleasure built higher and higher, that you were too far gone to stop now. "shit," jungwon moaned against your pussy, his voice thick with desperation, his eyes rolling back as if he were lost in the taste of you. the sound of him, so consumed by you, had you throwing your head back, overwhelmed by the intensity of it all.
"finally," he groaned, barely pulling away to speak, his lips brushing against your swollen folds, "you let me eat your pussy." his words were raw, dripping with satisfaction, but there was an edge to them, something darker, something possessive. his gaze flickered up to meet yours for a split second, a twisted smirk pulling at his lips. "but jay never got a chance to try, did he?" he added, his tone mocking, taunting. it was like he was relishing in the thought of jay being left out, being second to him. the mention of jay made your stomach twist with guilt, but before you could respond, jungwon's mouth moved lower, his tongue tracing a slick path that had you gasping.
you jerked as his tongue flicked over your puckered hole, the sensation sudden, intense, making your entire body tense on top of him. jungwon's moans vibrated against your skin, deep and primal, as he prodded his tongue against your tight hole. it was overwhelming—everything about him, the way he touched you, the way he tasted you, his hunger for you. "you’ve never let anyone fuck your ass, have you?" his voice was a low growl, filled with smug satisfaction as he pulled back just enough to look up at you. his eyes gleamed with dark desire, and the way he said it—it was like a promise, a claim. he had already decided what he wanted, and he wasn’t asking for permission. "but you’re gonna let me, aren’t you?" his voice was manic, dripping with that same twisted hunger, unable to move, unable to think. his hand gripped your hip tightly as his tongue slid back over your hole, teasing you again, the sensation sending shockwaves through your body. you couldn’t stop trembling, the mix of shock and heat building inside you, spiraling out of control. "i bet teddy didn’t feel half of what i’m feeling right now. the way you’re grinding on me, using me, just like you used to use him—except i can make you come for real." what? jungwon's voice was dark, teasing, but you could barely process his words, too busy trembling from the way his tongue continued to lick and lap at your soaked pussy.
"i’m gonna take every fucking part of you," he growled, his tongue swirling around your asshole before sliding back up to your pussy. "fuck every single one of your holes and fill it with my cum," he continued, his words thick with lust, his voice dark and commanding. "you’d like that, wouldn’t you?" a moan ripped from your throat, raw and uncontrollable, and before you could even process it, his palm came down hard against your ass, the sting sharp and immediate. the force of it made your muscles clench, and your whole body jerked forward. you could feel his grip tighten on your ass, spreading you even more as he leaned in again, licking a slow, deliberate path from your asshole to your pussy, leaving you gasping for air. "fuck, jungwon—" you struggled, trying to move, to regain some kind of control, but he was too strong. he pulled away from your pussy suddenly, replacing his tongue with the brutal force of his fingers, thrusting into you hard and fast.
the obscene sound of your wetness filled the room, mixing with your ragged breaths and the slap of his hand on your thigh. your legs shook, barely able to keep up with the intensity building inside you. "i know you can fucking squirt," jungwon hissed through clenched teeth, his eyes wild with lust. his jaw was slack, and his expression was hungry, like he was devouring every reaction you gave him. "come on," he growled, his fingers pumping deeper, harder. "fucking squirt all over me." your body couldn’t hold back any longer. you exploded, squirting in violent, uncontrollable bursts, your juices splashing against his chest, down his neck, his face. jungwon didn’t flinch—if anything, he groaned, deep and guttural, as he licked up every drop, his tongue greedy, relentless. "f-fuck, stop," you whimpered, your body trembling uncontrollably as waves of overstimulation crashed over you. your vision blurred, your muscles weak as you tried to crawl away, desperate for a break, for some relief. but jungwon wasn’t about to let you go. his hand shot out, gripping your ankle, yanking you back. "where do you think you're going?" he growled, a crazed look in his eyes as he towered over you. his hand moved to his pants, pulling his cock free, and the sight of it—hard, thick, dripping—sent another wave of heat coursing through your body. he stroked himself slowly, pre-cum leaking from the tip, his eyes locked on yours with an intensity that sent shivers through your entire body. his grip tightened on your hair, keeping you in place, the raw obsession in his gaze making your breath hitch.
"look at me," jungwon demanded, his hand forced your head up, and your eyes immediately fell on the sight of him stroking his cock, thick and hard right in front of your face. "you see this?" he hissed, his breath shaky, almost unhinged. "you fucking did this to me." "you’re going to take every fucking inch of me," he growled, his eyes burning with hunger as he leaned closer, his cock brushing your lips, daring you. "you hear that?" your lips parted unconsciously, your tongue flicking out to wet them, and jungwon noticed immediately, a wicked smirk twisting at the corners of his mouth. "that’s it…" he groaned, his voice filled with dark satisfaction. "you want it, don’t you?" you didn’t answer. you couldn’t. your mind was swirling, caught between the reality of how far things had gone and the way your body responded to his touch, to his words. "open up," he commanded, his voice steady, his gaze never wavering. "i want to feel that pretty little mouth wrapped around me while you fucking choke on it."
the words sent a shiver down your spine. he was watching you closely, waiting, his fingers still tight in your hair as he pressed his cock to your lips again, pushing against them, demanding more. he didn’t wait for you to respond, his hand pushing your head down as he slid his cock into your mouth without hesitation. you barely had time to process the size of him, thick and overwhelming, as he filled your mouth completely. your hands shot up, instinctively gripping his thighs, but jungwon didn’t slow down. he was relentless, thrusting into your mouth harder, faster, giving you no time to adjust. you gagged, struggling to take him, your eyes watering as he pushed deeper, but jungwon’s grip only tightened, holding you in place as he groaned low in his throat, lost in the sensation. "that’s it, fucking choke on it," he snarled, his voice dripping with filthy satisfaction. "you wanted this, didn’t you?" you couldn’t answer, couldn’t even breathe as his cock hit the back of your throat, choking you. your hands pressed against his thighs, trying to push him back, but he didn’t relent. his hips bucked against your mouth, forcing you to take more of him, his voice harsh, possessive. "you’re gonna take all of me," he growled, his eyes wild as he watched you struggle beneath him, his fingers digging into your scalp. "you think i’m gonna stop now? after all this? after everything you’ve done to me?" his voice cracked with intensity, his obsession bubbling over, too much to contain.
your tears mixed with spit, dripping down your chin as he fucked your mouth with ruthless abandon, his groans filling the air, echoing off the walls. "you look like such a fucking mess," he taunted, his voice thick with lust, but there was something more underneath, something twisted and broken. "drooling all over my cock like the slut you are." his words hit you like a blow, raw and degrading, but there was no denying the way your body reacted, the way your core tightened with every filthy insult, with every thrust that left you gasping for air. "you can’t even take half of me," he groaned, his cock stretching your mouth painfully, but there was no room to stop, no room to even breathe. "but you’ll fucking learn. you’ll learn how to take every inch of me." his thrusts became more erratic, more desperate, and the sounds of your gagging only seemed to fuel him further. "i’m gonna make you my fucking whore," jungwon growled, his words filled with possessiveness, his hand gripping your hair tighter, forcing you to take him deeper until you thought you might pass out from lack of air. and then, just when you thought he couldn’t push further, he pulled out suddenly, leaving you gasping for breath, your throat burning, your body trembling. your lips were swollen, wet, as you tried to steady yourself, but jungwon didn’t give you a chance to recover. he leaned down down to cage you between his arms, his bare chest pressed against yours, the heat of his body overwhelming, suffocating. his breath ghosted over your ear, “you’re mine,” he growled, his fingers digging into your hips, pinning you beneath him. “and you fucking know it. tell me how much you want it.”
your mind was spinning, your body reacting instinctively, “i want it, jungwon. i want you.” a smirk curled on his lips, his dark eyes gleaming with a twisted satisfaction, he completely had you. “fucking filthy for me,” he murmured, voice low and tainted with pride. “and i haven’t even started yet.” “you think jay or any of those other idiots came even close?" his lips brushed your ear, and he spoke again, darker this time. "i’m gonna fuck you so good, you’ll forget every single one of them. my cock’s the only one you’ll ever need." and then, he pushed inside, the stretch brutal, tearing a gasp from your throat. the sensation was overwhelming, too much, but it was exactly what you craved. your body arched beneath him, caught between the overwhelming pleasure and the creeping horror as his words sunk in. he had been watching. always watching.
"i’ve seen it all, and it's so much better than just sitting in front of my screen every night, getting myself off," jungwon muttered, his voice low, dripping with satisfaction. "every fucking time you let them touch you. every single moment you thought you were alone—i was watching." screen? your breath hitched, panic rising in your chest as the pieces began to fall into place. “you... what the fuck—how?” you gasped, horror flooding through you as the reality of what he said hit. “you were watching me?” jungwon’s pace never faltered, each thrust brutal and relentless. he locked eyes with you, dark and unapologetic. “yeah,” he sneered. “you didn’t think i’d let those assholes have you without making sure they weren’t fucking you up, did you? i had to make sure they didn’t hurt you. had to make sure you stayed mine.” "you had a fucking camera?" your voice cracked, the disbelief seeping into every word as the air between you turned suffocating.
he grinned darkly, eyes glinting with a manic edge. “yeah, i had a camera. more than one.” your heart pounded against your chest, anger and fear warring inside you. you tried to push him off, but your body, treacherous and betraying, moved with his rhythm. "jungwon, that’s... sick," you hissed, your voice trembling, but it didn’t stop your body from arching into him, from clenching around him as his thrusts became even more punishing. his hand shot up, gripping your jaw, forcing you to look into his eyes. "shut up," he growled, his face inches from yours, "you don’t get it, do you? i didn’t fucking care about them. i did this for you. no one else could touch you like this. no one else deserves you." your hands pressed against his chest, trying to fight back, but every thrust had you gasping for air, your thoughts blurring in the haze of pleasure and disgust. “you’re fucking sick, jungwon,” you managed to choke out.
he leaned in closer, his lips ghosting over your ear, a dark chuckle slipping from his lips. “yeah? i’m sick?” he sneered, his voice dripping with arrogance. “then why are you so fucking wet for me? you didn’t stop fucking against me, even after everything.” his words were twisted, taunting, but you couldn’t deny it. the shame twisted inside you, mixing with the pleasure coursing through your veins. "fuck off," you spat, but your voice lacked conviction, your body betraying the truth of what you were feeling. jungwon grinned, pulling back slightly to look down at you, his eyes gleaming with that same dark satisfaction. “you think i don’t know what you do when you’re alone?” he whispered, his voice low and mocking. “you think i didn’t see the way you fucked that teddy bear i got you, grinding against it like a desperate little slut, rubbing yourself raw until you came?” your stomach dropped, humiliation crashing over you in waves as the truth sank in. so that's what he meant earlier, the words flying by because you were too lost in pleasure, fuck, he'd really seen everything. you recall his words. "i bet teddy didn’t feel half of what i’m feeling right now. the way you’re grinding on me, using me, just like you used to use him—except i can make you come for real." "you... you’re disgusting," you stammered, the shame burning through your skin, but jungwon wasn’t fazed. he continued to fuck you, his hand reaching down to rub circles against your clit. but you slap his hand away, and he just smirks.
“yeah, maybe i am,” he groaned, his voice dripping with satisfaction as he pounded into you harder, drowning in the feeling of your tight, trembling walls wrapped around him. “but you’re mine. and you fucking love it.” his hand slid down to your throat, his fingers tightening just enough to make your breath hitch, his smirk widening as he saw the effect it had on you. “you’re never going to need anyone else. just me. say it.” you could barely breathe, let alone think, but even now, through the haze of pleasure and disgust, you couldn’t help but fight back. “i… i hate you—" “wrong fucking answer,” he snarled, his grip on your throat tightening as his hips snapped forward brutally, each thrust shaking you, pushing you deeper into the bed. the sheets tangled beneath you as you gasped for air, every brutal stroke tearing another cry from your lips. “try again. you fucking love this.” despite the storm of emotions flooding your mind—disgust, anger, shame—there was no denying it. the way his cock dragged against your walls, the way your body reacted to his dominance, had you screaming his name, it was sick and twisted, but it was true.
"didn’t you say you love me?" jungwon taunted, full of arrogance as he tightened his grip around your throat. the force of his thrusts had you bouncing against the mattress. “wasn’t that what you said?” you couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think, your body shaking as he pounded into you without mercy. all you could do was grip his arms tighter, pulling him closer, needing more despite the war raging inside you. "answer me," he growled, slamming into you harder, his hips grinding against you as his cock dragged in and out, each thrust more obscene than the last. "didn’t you say you fucking love me?" you tried to speak, but the pressure on your throat made it impossible to get the words out. your breath hitched, your vision blurring as his hand squeezed tighter. finally, you managed to whisper, your voice shaky and broken. “you’re my brother... of course, i—I do—” jungwon’s eyes lit up with a twisted, possessive fire. his grip tightened even more as he watched you, you were breaking, and he loved it. "you're mine," he growled, the intensity in his voice sending another wave of heat through you. "say it." "i’m yours," you gasped, the words spilling out of you, tears streaming down your cheeks as the weight of everything crashed into you. it was true. you were his, and no matter how hard you fought it, there was no escaping it, not anymore when he was balls deep in you giving you pleasure you'd only dreamed of.
that wicked, satisfied grin spreading across his face as he leaned in, his teeth sinking into your bottom lip hard enough to make you wince. the pain mixed with pleasure, sending a shiver down your spine, your moans turning into broken sobs as he fucked you deeper into the mattress. “fuck—” you gasped, barely able to get the word out before he was thrusting into you again, harder, faster, his hips grinding against yours as if he was trying to bury himself deeper, trying to own every inch of you. and maybe he already had. no, he did. he completely owned you. “shit,” jungwon growled, his breath hot and ragged as he pounded into you, the sound of his hips slamming against yours filling the room. your entire body convulsed, the stretch of him deep inside you was overwhelming, but your body refused to let him go. your walls clenched around him, desperate to keep him there, desperate to feel more of him. “fuck,” you sobbed, nails digging into his back, trying to hold on, but it was no use. he had you completely, and he knew it. "jungwon, i can’t— you’re gonna break me—"
"yes, you can," he snarled, his lips hovering just over yours, his voice dripping with possession. he thrust harder, deeper, making you scream as he pushed past every limit. “you fucking can. i’m not stopping until you’re ruined for anyone else." the sheer force of his words, the raw need in his voice, sent a jolt of heat through you, making your head spin. your moans turned into broken sobs, your body shaking uncontrollably beneath him as he drove into you mercilessly, taking you apart piece by piece. you were addicted to him. you came again, violently, your entire body trembling as your release gushed over his cock. your orgasm hit you like a wave, crashing down and leaving you gasping for breath, your mind going blank as everything else faded away. jungwon let out a deep, desperate groan, his body shuddering as he felt you clench around him. “fuck,” he hissed through clenched teeth, his voice thick with crazed lust as he gripped your hips even tighter, bruising your skin. "your fucking pussy—god, it’s perfect. you’re fucking perfect." "you know, i fucking hated jay for touching you," jungwon growled, his pace becoming even more brutal not stopping even if your pussy was already dripping all over the sheets. "letting him fuck you like that. making him cum inside you? is that what you wanted, huh?" his fingers thread through your hair, keeping you pinned down as he licked long stripes up your neck again, obsessed with the way your sweat tasted. “you wanna be a fucking cum dumpster? that what you like? letting them fill you up just so i could fucking watch?"
you whimpered, shaking your head, but your body was betraying you, reacting to his words, to the way he was fucking you. "don’t fucking lie," he spat, his eyes burning with obsession as he pulled back to look at you. "you liked putting on a show for me, didn’t you? i almost think you were doing it on purpose.” “jungwon, no, I—” you tried to protest, your voice trembling, but the pleasure was too intense, every thrust from him stealing the words from your mouth. “letting me watch you get ruined, just so i could want you more,” he sneered. “you’re fucking mine now,” he growled, his voice low and dark, each word dripping with madness. “and i’m gonna make sure jay fucking sees it.” your heart dropped, panic surging through you. “no, jungwon—he can’t,” you gasped, your body trembling as the realization of what he was saying crashed over you. the thought of jay finding out, of seeing you like this, was too much. “he can’t know—" jungwon’s chuckled, "oh, so you want to keep this secret? keep fucking your stepbrother behind his back?" he taunted, his voice cruel, mocking, as he drove himself deeper into you. you choked on a sob, trying to push him away, "jungwon, please—" you begged, your voice breaking, but he wasn’t listening. “what’s the matter?” he taunts, his breath hot against your skin. “scared of what jay would think? scared of what he’d do if he knew you were getting fucked by your stepbrother?”
his grip on your jaw tightened, forcing you to look at him, his eyes wild with obsession. “you don’t get to hide from this,” he growled, his voice low and possessive. “you’re mine, and i want everyone to fucking know it.”
you could barely speak, your voice cracking as you pleaded with him. “please, jungwon—he can’t find out—” for a moment, he seemed to hesitate, his pace slowing just enough to let you catch your breath, the pressure easing. but then, without warning, he flipped you over, pushing you onto your hands and knees. your arms shook as you tried to hold yourself up, but your body was trembling, weak from everything he’d already done to you. before you could brace yourself, his hand came down hard on your ass, the sharp sting making you yelp, your body jerking forward. the sheets twisted beneath you as you struggled to hold yourself up, but jungwon wasn’t giving you any time to recover. “you’re gonna fucking take it,” he growled, his voice thick with lust as he lined himself up behind you before roughly facing you to face the foot of your bed. “and you’re gonna scream my name so loud, jay will fucking hear it.” "keep it together," jungwon growled, his hand coming down on your ass again, the sharp slap forcing a yelp from your throat. this time, the sting was harsher, your body jolting under the weight of his dominance. "i'm not fucking done with you." you whimpered, your arms weak, trembling as you tried to push yourself up, but it was useless. your limbs felt like jelly, barely able to hold you together as he lined himself up behind you again. your heart pounded, fear and anticipation swirling in your gut as he slammed into you without warning, driving deep, the angle sending a shock through your entire body. "fuck," you gasped, your back arching involuntarily as he filled you, the stretch almost unbearable. your hands scrambled to grab the sheets, but every thrust made you lose control, your body collapsing beneath him as he continued, merciless. "arch your back," he snarled, gripping your hips and yanking you into position. even as you shook your head, gasping for air, his hold was unyielding, bending you exactly how he wanted. “i can’t—” you choked out, tears streaming down your face as the pleasure and pain intertwined, his cock hitting places that had you seeing stars. "it's too much—"
"yes, you fucking can," he hissed, his fingers digging into your skin, leaving marks. "i’m not stopping until you can’t take anyone else. until i ruin you for anyone." every word hit like a blow, sending you spiraling, your body teetering on the edge as he pounded into you harder, deeper. you sobbed, your mind a haze of pleasure and panic. your body was betraying you, responding to him, clenching around him like it needed this, needed him, despite the fear gnawing at your insides. and then he leaned forward, his chest pressing against your back, his breath hot against your neck as he yanked your head back into a kiss. the kiss was desperate, messy, full of raw hunger. his tongue flicked against yours, and you couldn’t even respond, couldn’t do anything but whimper as his weight crushed you, trapping you beneath him. the position made it harder to breathe, your neck straining, and the angle made every thrust hit deeper, driving you closer to the edge, closer to losing yourself completely. your eyes fluttered shut, your mind trying to escape, but then jungwon’s voice snapped you back. “look.”
you couldn’t. you were too lost, too overwhelmed, your moans spilling out uncontrollably as he kept slamming into you. but he wasn’t giving you a choice. his hand gripped your jaw, forcing your head up, and he growled, "open your eyes." you blinked through the haze, confused and trembling. and then you saw it—your teddy bear, sitting on the dresser, its black, unfeeling eyes staring back at you. at first, it didn’t register. what the fuck was he doing? jungwon chuckled darkly behind you, his breath hot against your neck. "say hi," he whispered, amusement dripping from his voice, sending a chill down your spine. "say hi?" you repeated, confusion cutting through the fog of pleasure. your voice was broken, barely audible. "i don't—" “smile for the camera,” he taunted, his tone turning cruel, dark amusement coloring every word. “come on, he's watching.” your stomach dropped, horror twisting inside you like a knife. jay was watching this?
you moaned, but not from pleasure—this time, it was from sheer humiliation. the sound ripped from your throat as your eyes locked onto the faint red blinking light in the teddy bear's eyes. panic surged through you, icy and cold, the realization hitting you like a truck. jay was watching. live. the toy that had been a source of comfort for you, the one you used to hold onto during sleepless nights, had been turned into something twisted, something ugly. you became hysterical, your body trembling uncontrollably beneath jungwon’s relentless thrusts. "no, no, no," you sobbed, your voice breaking as the tears streamed down your face. but there was no escape. your mind was spiraling, torn between disgust, shame, and the unbearable sensation of jungwon still fucking you, not letting up. "what's wrong?" jungwon’s voice was low, mocking, dripping with sick amusement as he slowed his thrusts just enough to make you feel every inch of him. "you don’t wanna tell jay how good i'm fucking you?" your body betrayed you, clenching around him, even as the tears kept falling, even as the humiliation consumed you. you couldn’t stop it. you couldn’t fight back. jungwon’s hand clamped over your mouth, muffling your sobs as he pounded into you harder, more ruthless, more relentless. the weight of everything crashed down on you—jay was watching, seeing you like this. you wouldn’t be able to face him ever again. the shame burned deep inside you, twisting, making you feel even more exposed, even more ruined.
“open your eyes,” jungwon demanded, his voice rough, filled with dominance, and your eyes snapped open out of reflex. you couldn’t help it. your gaze flickered back to the teddy bear, the red light still blinking, and the full realization of what was happening hit you like a tidal wave. jay was watching you get fucked, wrecked by your stepbrother. and just as jungwon thrust deeper, you felt it—your body giving in, pleasure and pain mixing until you couldn’t tell the difference. your muffled screams were drowned out by the sound of skin slapping against skin, your body trembling as you clung to the sheets, unable to stop yourself from falling apart. you hated how much your body responded to him, hated how much you needed it, how much you needed him, even as your mind screamed at you to stop. but it was too late. you were already his, and jay was watching. and jungwon wasn’t going to stop until you both knew it. your body betrayed you, clenching tighter around him even as more tears spilled down your cheeks, sobs wracking your chest. you couldn’t process it—the mix of shame, horror, and pleasure tangling into something you couldn’t escape. jay was watching you. seeing you like this. jungwon wasn’t stopping. his hand clamped down over your mouth, muffling your cries as he kept pounding into you, relentless. mind drowning in the flood of emotions crashing over you—humiliation, lust, guilt. how could jay be seeing this? wasn’t he supposed to be away? "you’re lying!" you tried to scream, but jungwon’s hand silenced you, your body jerking with each thrust. the teddy bear, the once comforting presence, was now an unfeeling witness to your destruction, its cold eyes staring blankly as jungwon wrecked you.
you squeezed your eyes shut, desperate to escape it all, but it only made the emotions stronger. if jay was really watching this, if he saw you like this, you’d never be able to face him again. the thought burned inside you, making you feel even more exposed, more ruined. "open your fucking eyes," jungwon demanded, his voice dark with control, and your eyes snapped open on instinct. there it was again—the teddy bear. that damned blinking light, red and cruel, blinking like it was mocking you. and just as jungwon drove deeper, your eyes rolled back, moans slipping from your lips, your body betraying every bit of shame and fear as he kept you pinned, fucking you harder than before. "i even got him a present," jungwon grunted, his voice tight, on the edge, his pace turning erratic, desperate. "but i don’t think he’ll want them anymore." your mind shattered under the way he was fucking you. humiliation melted into something raw, something addictive. fuck—this was too good. jungwon fucking you like this was too fucking good. the way he wanted you, the way he claimed you—you were gone. completely. your body shook violently beneath him, each thrust pushing you deeper into a haze of pure need. you couldn’t think straight, couldn’t hold onto anything except the brutal pace of him inside you, each thrust wrecking you in ways you never thought possible. words slipped from your mouth before you could stop them.
"jay… i'm sorry," you gasped, voice ragged and desperate, barely able to breathe between each word.
jungwon's grip on your throat tightened, his lips curling into a wicked smirk. "sorry? don't fucking apologize," he growled, pulling your face closer to his. "tell him the truth. tell him how good i’m fucking you." “i can’t—” you whimpered, voice barely above a whisper, your body betraying you as you moaned against his hand, your legs quaking as another wave of pleasure hit you. “yes, you can,” jungwon hissed in your ear, his voice low and dangerous, filled with twisted satisfaction. "tell him how good i’m fucking you. tell him who really owns you now." jungwon’s grip tightened, forcing your eyes back to the teddy bear, the blinking red light that reminded you of the truth. "he’s watching, baby," jungwon whispered, his lips brushing against your ear as his hips snapped against yours. "watching you fall apart for me. watching me wreck your pretty little pussy. doesn’t it feel good? doesn’t it feel right?"
every thrust, every degrading word spilling from jungwon’s lips—he was right. you fucking loved it. "tell him," jungwon coaxed, his voice soft now, almost soothing as his hand slid down your body, his fingers circling your clit. "tell him how much you love it." "jay," you sobbed, your voice ragged, trembling. "i… i—fuck, i love it." the words slipped out before you could stop them, your body arching beneath jungwon, completely surrendering. jungwon’s grin widened, his satisfaction palpable as he fucked you harder, his fingers working faster on your clit, driving you to the brink. "good girl," he whispered, his voice dripping with approval. "now tell him you're mine. tell him who really owns you." "i’m yours," you choked out, your voice breaking as the words left your lips. "i’m yours, jungwon." his thrusts grew erratic, desperate, and you felt him twitch inside you, his breathing ragged as he chased his release. "that’s right," he growled, his voice thick with possessiveness. "you're mine. and now jay knows it too." he had you folded, knees pressed tight against your chest, your back arching painfully as jungwon forced your head up, making you watch, making you feel every single second of it.
there was no escaping it now. not the humiliation. not the pleasure. everything was crashing over you, overwhelming, and there was no way out. you were a wreck—drool slipping from your parted lips, your tongue poking out as moans poured from your mouth, completely uncontrollable. “fuck, fuck, fuck!” you screamed, the sound raw, desperate, like you were on the verge of breaking apart entirely. “yessss,” you dragged out, your jaw slack, body trembling, utterly destroyed beneath him. jungwon wasn’t any better, his face buried in your neck, his breath erratic and hot against your skin as he lost himself inside of you. his moans grew louder, sloppier, his entire body shaking with the effort of holding on just a little longer. he was completely gone, fucking feral, groaning into your skin as he slammed into you, harder, deeper, like he needed to ruin you—like nothing else mattered except the sound of your body breaking under him. "i’m gonna come inside you,” he groaned, his voice hoarse, broken, like he was barely holding on. “fill you up so good, no one else will ever fucking compare. you’re mine." "please," you whimpered, your voice trembling, on the edge, barely able to form words. "fuck, come inside me. ruin me, i need it—i need you to." your begging shattered him, ripped away whatever restraint he had left. with one final brutal thrust, jungwon buried himself deep inside you, his whole body seizing, shuddering violently as he came.
you felt it—hot, thick, pouring into you, the heat filling every inch of your body as he groaned your name, his face twisted in pure, animalistic pleasure.
your last orgasm slammed into you—overwhelming, all-consuming. your vision blurred, your mouth open in a scream you barely recognized as your own, your mind blank as pleasure ravaged you, wave after violent wave. "fuck!" you cried out, voice raw, completely wrecked, as your body convulsed under him. your legs trembled, your breath coming in broken gasps as jungwon stayed pressed against you, his body just as wrecked as yours, both of you caught in the intensity of it all. he collapsed on top of you, breath hot, panting harshly in your ear, but neither of you moved. neither of you could. you were both completely spent, bodies locked together, tangled in the aftermath of what just happened. but even as the pleasure faded, your body still craved him. even as reality crashed back, the weight of what you’d done hung heavy. you gave in to him. completely. utterly. your fucking stepbrother. when he finally pulled out, you felt it—his cum leaking out of you, dripping down your thighs, pooling on the ruined sheets beneath you. but jungwon wasn’t done. not yet. his grip didn’t loosen. instead, he grabbed your jaw, forcing your face up, turning you toward the camera. his lips brushed against your cheek, pressing a mocking kiss there, eyes never leaving the lens. you were fucked out, barely conscious, eyes glazed and half-lidded, a ruined mess under him. and that’s exactly what jungwon wanted.
he wanted jay to see everything. but jungwon wasn’t done. he grabbed your wrist, lifting it with ease, forcing your limp hand into a wave. the gesture was slow, deliberate, mocking as he waved it toward the blinking red light in the teddy bear’s eyes. jungwon chuckled softly, watching as your eyes fluttered closed, your head lolling to the side. you were passed out, completely ruined, your body limp beneath him, and yet, even in your unconscious state, he still had control. “that’s right,” he whispered, his voice barely audible, dark satisfaction rolling off him in waves as he gently lowered your hand, brushing a thumb over your wrist like it was some twisted act of affection. “no coming back now.” he leaned back, his eyes locked on your ruined form, and for a moment, the room was filled with nothing but the sound of his ragged breath. everything had fallen apart, and yet for jungwon, this was everything. this was what he wanted. to have you like this—to show jay, to show you both, that there was no escaping him. he smirked, glancing back at the camera, his eyes glinting with that same sick satisfaction. “hope you enjoyed the show,” he muttered under his breath, mocking, taunting, before finally pulling away from your limp body. because there was no coming back from this. not for you. not for jay.
jay entered the house quietly, a smile tugging at his lips. everything jungwon had told him was perfectly set in place—you supposedly asleep, the surprise he’d planned all ready to go. they’d planned this days ago, jungwon kept complaining about how sad you were, how much you missed jay. so jay had left early, closing out everything he needed to just to make you happy. jungwon had assured him he’d be out with jake and sunghoon to give you both privacy, and he’d even asked jay to shut down his computer. jungwon didn’t want you pestering him about the bill, and jay, being the kind of guy he was, had agreed. he trusted jungwon. loved him like a brother. but as jay moved through the house, he noticed something—the faint sound of movement coming from your room. he paused, heart racing a little faster, not wanting to be caught just yet. he wanted the surprise to be perfect. he slipped into jungwon’s room quietly, careful not to make any noise. the desk sat in front of him, the soft glow of the screen catching his eye. then he saw it.
jay’s heart dropped, his smile fading, replaced by a wave of confusion, then horror. on the screen was a live feed of your room—jungwon fucking you relentlessly, his hand clamped over your mouth, muffling your sobs. your face was streaked with tears, your body shaking from the intensity of his thrusts. jay froze. the bouquet of flowers he had been holding slipped from his grasp, hitting the floor softly, forgotten. his mind was a whirlwind of emotions—anger, betrayal, disgust—all fighting for control. he wanted to move, wanted to storm into that room and tear jungwon off you. but he didn’t. he couldn’t. his feet were glued to the floor as he stared at the screen, his heart shattering with each passing second. “open your fucking eyes,” jungwon’s voice snarled through the speakers, low and demanding. jay watched as your eyes snapped open, locking onto something out of frame. the pain in your eyes was clear at first, but then, as jungwon slammed into you harder, deeper, something shifted. your eyes rolled back, your body arching beneath him, moans spilling from your lips. you fucking loved it.
jay’s stomach churned. bile rose in his throat as the realization hit him like a sledgehammer. this wasn’t just some accident. this wasn’t some mistake. you wanted this. you wanted him. jungwon. your fucking stepbrother. the betrayal was suffocating. you—his girlfriend, the person he thought he knew inside and out—were being wrecked by someone he considered family. jungwon, the brother he trusted, was fucking you, and you were falling apart beneath him. how long had this been going on? how many times had you let him touch you like this? fuck you like this? jay’s eyes flickered to the keyboard. there they were—your panties. his favorite. stained with jungwon’s dried cum. disgust surged through him. his fists clenched at his sides, rage burning beneath his skin. but he couldn’t stop watching. he couldn’t fucking stop. "i even got him a present," jungwon grunted, his voice strained, breathless. "but i doubt he’ll want them anymore." jay’s heart twisted painfully as he realized the truth—this was all planned. jungwon had set him up. this entire thing was a fucking setup, a game. jay’s vision blurred, his pulse pounding in his ears. jungwon’s hips slammed into you, harder and harder, your body writhing beneath him, begging for more.
you were so lost in the pleasure, moaning and gasping, completely ruined—and jay could only stand there, watching, as his entire world crumbled. how could you do this? you were sobbing now, crying out jungwon’s name as you begged for him to finish inside you. the sound of your voice, raw and desperate, shattered what was left of jay’s heart. he felt sick. had this been a game to you? had any of it been real? he couldn’t tear his eyes away. he hated you. he hated jungwon. but there was something else too. but he kept on watching, he needed to see it—to burn the image into his mind so he’d never forget. so he could walk away from you both forever. and when jungwon reached for your limp wrist, lifting it in a grotesque imitation of a wave. that was the final straw. jay stormed out of the room, the door slamming hard behind him, the sound echoing through the house. the bouquet of flowers lay forgotten on the floor, just like everything else.
you stared at your reflection in the bathroom mirror, water dripping from your body, washing away the remnants of jungwon’s touch. but no matter how much you scrubbed, the feeling of him stayed, clinging to your skin, humming in your veins. and the guilt—it sat in your chest like a weight, suffocating, crushing, making it hard to breathe. you couldn’t deny it—you didn’t even want to. you wanted him. you had wanted him for longer than you’d ever been willing to admit, even to yourself. there had always been something between you two, something dark and magnetic, pulling you toward him, something you didn’t fully understand. but wanting him came at a price, one you weren’t ready to pay. your reflection stared back at you, hollow-eyed, cheeks stained with tears that wouldn’t stop falling. jungwon’s hands, his breath, his lips—they were all still on you, etched into your skin. it made your stomach twist in knots, a tangle of longing and disgust. how could you want something that felt so wrong? so twisted? but was it really wrong? the two of you weren’t even related by blood. you didn’t ask for your parents to marry each other, you didn’t want any of this. when jungwon stepped into the bathroom, naked, his eyes dark and possessive, you couldn’t help the way your pulse quickened. his presence filled the space like a shadow, and you couldn’t escape it. didn’t want to, really. the tension between you two was suffocating, and yet you craved it. his eyes locked onto yours, something soft flickering beneath the possessiveness, a hint of caution. he didn’t wait for an invitation—just closed the door behind him and stepped toward you, as if he had every right. his gaze stayed on yours, but there was hesitation in the air, uncertainty mixed with that overwhelming pull.
"do you hate me?" his voice was quiet, barely above a whisper. your throat tightened, the words sticking to the back of your throat, almost too heavy to say. "i... i don’t hate you," you whispered, your voice shaking. "but i hate myself." he stepped closer, his hand reaching for yours, but you flinched, pulling back, creating space between you that you didn’t really want. you ached for him, craved his touch, but the shame was too much. it felt wrong. he felt wrong. and then jay... jay didn’t deserve any of this. and from the look on your face, jungwon knew exactly who you were thinking about. his jaw clenched, his expression hardening slightly, but his voice stayed soft, coaxing. "forget about him," he murmured, leaning in close enough that his forehead brushed against yours. his breath was warm, his presence overwhelming. "he doesn’t matter." you shook your head, a sob catching in your throat. "he does matter. he trusted me, jungwon. he didn’t deserve this. how do i even look him in the eye again? i destroyed him." "i can’t—" your voice cracked, the guilt too heavy, threatening to drown you. "i need to talk to him. i need to make things right." jungwon’s fingers tightened around your wrist, his grip firm, possessive. his face hardened. "don’t," he said sharply, his voice taking on an edge. "he’ll only hurt you. he’ll say things that’ll tear you apart. i’m not letting you do that to yourself." "i can’t just pretend this didn’t happen!" your voice wavered, panic rising in your chest. "i work with him, jungwon. how am i supposed to face him? how do i show up?"
"you don’t," jungwon replied, his tone softer but still firm. "call in sick for the week. take time off. you don’t need to put yourself through that right now." there was that possessiveness again, woven into every word, like he didn’t want you anywhere near jay. not now. maybe not ever. "i need work," you mumbled, more to yourself than to him, but the thought of walking into that office, of facing jay after everything, made your stomach churn. "but maybe you’re right..." "i am right," jungwon said, kissing your temple gently, his lips lingering there like a promise. "you don’t need to see him. not now." his words were soft, but there was an underlying intensity. and even though the guilt still weighed heavy on your chest, there was something comforting in the way he held you, kissed you, tried to make the weight lighter. "but i can’t forgive myself," you whispered, pulling back enough to look him in the eyes. "i can’t just forget what i did to him." his gaze softened slightly, a flicker of something close to regret crossing his face. "i’m sorry," he murmured, voice low. "i didn’t want to hurt you. but i couldn’t stop myself." "i know," you whispered back, feeling the conflict tearing you apart. "but jay didn’t deserve this. he didn’t deserve to be hurt." "you don’t need to see him," jungwon repeated, his tone firm again, his grip tightening just enough to remind you that he wasn’t letting you go. "you don’t owe him anything."
"it’s not about owing him," you said, trying to explain, but your voice was trembling. "it’s about what i did. i need to make things right." jungwon’s eyes darkened, his jaw clenching. "he’ll just hurt you. i won’t let that happen." his tone was final, possessive. you nodded, but your mind was elsewhere, lost in thoughts of jay—of what he’d seen, of how you’d betrayed him. how could you ever face him again? jungwon’s hand cupped your face, his thumb brushing away the tears that had started falling again. "don’t break yourself over him," he whispered, pressing his lips to yours, soft, lingering. "i love you." and as he pulled you into his arms, your tears soaking into his skin, the guilt and shame still weighed heavy in your chest. you didn’t want to feel this way, didn’t want to let jungwon go either. you were trapped between the ache in your heart and the warmth of jungwon’s arms, knowing you couldn’t escape either.
"i'm so fucked, won," you whimpered, your voice barely audible, thick with guilt and desperation. jungwon’s hand tightened around you, pulling you closer, his breath warm against your ear. "no, you’re not," he whispered, voice low and soothing, even though his grip was firm, possessive. "you’re mine." you trembled in his arms, your mind spinning with the weight of everything. the shame, the guilt, the way your body still craved his touch despite it all. "how can you say that?" your voice cracked. "i’ve destroyed everything. i can’t—" he cut you off, his lips brushing your temple softly, "you didn’t destroy anything. you just did what you’ve always wanted. what we’ve both wanted." you shook your head, tears slipping down your cheeks again. "but jay—" "forget him," jungwon growled softly, his tone darkening, fingers digging into your skin. "he doesn’t matter anymore. i’m the one who’s here. i’m the one who wants you, who’s always wanted you." he tilted your chin up, forcing you to look at him, his eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that made your breath hitch. "you’re not fucked, y/n. you’re right where you need to be."
after a few days of silence, when things had started to feel somewhat normal—if you could even call it that—your phone buzzed with a message. you glanced at it, not expecting anything out of the ordinary. but when you saw the name, your stomach twisted.
jay.
your hands trembled as you unlocked your phone, heart pounding in your chest. the message wasn’t what you’d hoped for, though a part of you knew it wouldn’t be kind. not after everything you've done.
jay: slacking off because you’re busy fucking your brother? i didn’t think you’d let this affect your job.
the words hit you like a slap, cold and sharp. your blood boiled, anger mixing with the shame that had been eating away at you. he didn’t understand. he couldn’t. this wasn’t just about that one night; this was bigger than that, more complicated. but how could he ever see that?
you felt a surge of emotions—anger, guilt, frustration—rising inside you, clouding your thoughts. maybe you did feel a little mad. mad that jay could reduce everything to something so ugly, so cruel. but also mad that you had no way to make him understand.
without thinking, you started typing back a response, your fingers flying over the keys, not even caring what you’d say at this point.
you: fuck you, jay. you don’t know shit—
but before you could hit send, jungwon was there, his hand grabbing the phone from your grip with a swift, firm motion.
"don’t," he said, his voice low, warning. “don’t respond.”
you snapped your head toward him, anger flashing in your eyes. “give it back,” you demanded, reaching for the phone, but jungwon held it out of your reach, his expression unreadable.
“you don’t need to answer him,” jungwon said, his voice calm, “he’s just trying to get under your skin.”
“well, it worked,” you spat, your chest heaving with frustration. “he doesn’t understand. he’ll never understand.” jungwon’s jaw clenched, and he stepped even closer, his presence overpowering, almost suffocating. "he’ll be fine. people get hurt, they get over it. he’ll move on, and so will you." his hand reached out, fingers brushing against your cheek, wiping away a tear that slipped down. "you don’t owe him anything. not an explanation, not an apology. nothing." you wanted to fight back, to argue with him, but the weight of everything had worn you down. maybe jungwon was right. maybe time would heal it, or at least make it easier to bear. the guilt and shame wouldn’t go away overnight, but maybe you could deal with it when the time came. maybe when things weren’t so fresh. for now, you’d have to let it go. at least for a little while.
"you don’t get it," you whispered, your voice barely audible. "i need to apologize. i need to make things right with him."
"not right now, you don’t." jungwon’s fingers curled around your wrist, pulling you closer to him. his voice softened, but there was that possessiveness still lingering in every word. "you’ll deal with it when you’re ready. but not now."
you let out a shaky breath, leaning into him, the warmth of his touch soothing the storm of emotions inside you. it was hard to let go of the guilt, but the pull of jungwon was stronger—always had been. maybe time would heal the wounds, maybe someday you’d be able to face jay. you would apologize to him. one day.
jungwon tilted your chin up, his lips brushing against yours in a soft kiss, one that slowly deepened, and you let yourself melt into it. the warmth of his body, the way his hand cradled the back of your neck—it was enough to quiet your mind, to let the guilt slip away, if only for a moment.
when the kiss broke, jungwon’s eyes were dark, full of that same need, one that you had grown addicted to. his thumb brushed over your lips. "you don’t need to deal with him right now. not when he’s just going to say shit to hurt you."
you hesitated for a second, but as jungwon’s lips found yours again, as his hands slipped down your waist, you were convinced. maybe you were just being true to yourself, following what you wanted, even if it came with consequences.
"okay," you breathed, your voice barely above a whisper.
jungwon smiled, a small, satisfied smirk that sent a thrill through you. he knew he had you.
"good girl." he whispered, his lips brushing against your ear before he kissed your neck, slow and deliberate.
jungwon was in the kitchen, apron on, focused on flipping the eggs just right. the sound of sizzling filled the space, and the familiar smell of breakfast hung in the air. this had become routine, the comfortable quiet that came from knowing you were still sound asleep in his bed, wrapped up in his shirt, your playful remarks slowly making a comeback, the little jabs at each other that made things feel normal again.
it took a while, but you were both taking it step by step. he smiled to himself as he wiped his hands on a towel, stepping toward the hallway. he quietly peeked into the room—his room now, really. there you were, tangled in the sheets, looking peaceful, beautiful as always. jungwon lingered in the doorway for a moment longer, his heart swelling at the sight of you. it felt right. because you belonged there, with him. a knock echoed through the house. jungwon takes off his apron and tossed it on the kitchen counter but not before turning the stove off, moving toward the door. the knock came again, sharper this time. "just a second," he called out.
he opened it. standing there, dressed casually—loose jeans and a black band shirt, a faded logo barely visible on the front. the figure was hunched slightly, typing something on their phone, fingers moving quickly across the screen. staring down at his phone, brow furrowed in concentration, before slowly lifting his gaze. their eyes met, and for a moment, neither of them moved. jay. neither spoke. jay’s face was hard to read. jungwon didn’t say a word, but his body tensed, eyes locked on jay’s. both of them just stood there, the weight of everything unspoken hanging between them, thick and heavy in the air. and then, as if on cue, the phone in jungwon’s back pocket vibrated. the sound was subtle but sharp, breaking the silence. jay’s eyes flickered down to jungwon’s pocket. jungwon’s lips twitched, and slowly, a smirk spread across his face.
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Twin Flame (Rafe Cameron x Reader)
Word count: 11.6K
Summary: you play people just for the fun of it and they’re none the wiser. the only one who knows the real you is your best friend, rafe cameron, who you have the most fun toying with—and the feeling is mutual
Tags: (18+), toxic!rafe, toxic!reader (they match each others freak heavily), manipulative and mean!reader, violence, brief jj x reader, smidge of dubcon, fingering, unprotected sex, choking, biting, all that fun stuff and messy drama
A/N: writing toxic!reader was so fun actually. had this set pre/in season 1 in my mind so rafe isn’t fullll psycho yet. this is long ik but the plot was plotting and it’s worth it i swear
OBX masterlist + main masterlist
A lot of people would say Rafe wasn’t a great guy. Probably not even a good one. Hell, not even a decent one. But you didn’t care about any of that because, for some reason, Rafe Cameron was your best friend in the world, and you were his.
You didn’t have an exact reason for it, but everyone knew it was true. Sure, you had a few guesses. It could be because you had been Sarah’s friend first but picked him over her, and he needed that sort of validation. Maybe it was because you weren’t like his other friends, most of which you could only handle in small doses. Maybe it was because the two of you saw eye to eye on a lot of things. You looked at the world the same way as him and it was something neither of you had encountered before each other.
Or maybe it was because, even though people somewhat knew the real him, he was the only one close enough to know the real you, and he liked that.
The highs were high with Rafe for sure, but the lows were low. As much fun as the two of you had together, you would fight like words could cut and you were both going for the kill. It was because you really saw each other that you could exist in such a friendship and still return to one another. You understood the worst of each other in ways no one else could.
Whatever it was that drew him to you and kept him there, you didn’t really care. You were partners in crime so long you didn’t feel the urge to ask, and you were certain he felt the same way.
The ‘crime’ thing was literal today, which was lucky, because today was a good day between the two of you.
You were just coming off of an argument that led you to ignore him for two whole days. Then he showed up at your house with a brand new dress and an invite to a party. You’d already been invited to the same party, but the dress was a cute little black piece that was perfect for you.
Rafe was the only one of your friends who regularly bought you things, and even though you could afford them for yourself, you appreciated the thought and effort. And just like that, you accepted the bribe and forgave him. You took your time to get ready and he kept you company, catching up on the last two days as if nothing had happened. You joined him in his drug dealer, Barry’s, trailer as he bought supplies for the party.
You watched Rafe as he drove away from Barry’s with his jaw clenched. He must’ve felt you watching because it didn’t take him long to clue you in on why his mood had suddenly gone sour.
“I should’ve punched him,” Rafe said pointedly, throwing you a glance.
“He sells you coke, so suck it up,” you advised, fighting off a smirk as Rafe’s hands gripped the steering wheel tighter. “I don’t care so I don’t see why it bothers you so much.”
Of course you got why it bothered him. Most of the time you didn’t bother to pretend around him the way you did in front of everyone else. He could easily decipher your lies and the fakeness in your tone when no one else could so why bother?
This time you were only pretending for your own amusement because Rafe was far too distracted by your interaction with Barry to really pay attention. You could see how much he regretted not forcing you to wait in the car.
It wasn’t even that bad. Barry whistled when you walked in behind Rafe, watching your hands tug down the edges of your little black dress as you entered his trailer.
“Where’d you find her and how do I get one?” Barry had said to him under his breath, although he had a hard time with volume control given that you heard clearly.
The comment set Rafe on edge. He was quick to exchange the money for drugs and hustle you out of the trailer and back into his truck, his hand on your shoulder guiding you the entire time.
“You don’t see why him saying some shit like that would bother me?” Rafe asked with a condescending tone to his voice, fully looking over at you as his truck rolled up to a red light.
Rafe wasn’t as complicated as you once thought he was. You learned his tells. The way he said it alone was enough, but the slight narrowness of his eyes told you he could go either way.
On one hand, you could push his buttons. It was easy for you to get the straight line of his mouth to turn to a frown and set him off. Sometimes it was amusing, watching him get angry. It was what you had done a couple days ago, but when he got angry he could get mean, and that led to the two day silent treatment. Tonight you were on your way to a party and that wasn’t the energy you were going for.
So there was the other hand, where you could reel him back in and get him to calm down before it was too late. Something like a sweet smile and an apology or a joke to lighten the mood would work on him.
You went with the latter given you had nothing to apologize for this time.
“Please, you’d trade me for five dollars if you really need the money,” you teased.
He hesitated for a second, like he was making up his mind. You gave him a little smile and watched Rafe’s shoulders untense. The light turned green and he faced forward again, but you could still see a similar expression appear on his face.
“Ten bucks at least, give me a little credit,” he threw back. “Twenty if I’m feeling sentimental.”
You let out a sarcastic laugh. “As if you ever feel sentimental.”
And just like that he was back to normal. You had the power to do that. It wasn’t a power just anyone had, controlling Rafe. Maybe “controlling” sounded a bit heavy-handed, but what else would you call it?
A few different people had told you that Rafe only seemed truly happy around you, and you figured that was true. Not many people could make him smile just because.
Conversation picked back up again, the two of you going back and forth until you were laughing like crazy. No one else had the privilege to see either of you like this, both you and Rafe grinning and rambling on.
You knew Rafe was in a better mood than before because he was speeding. He usually drove pretty fast, but it was always at a different level whenever he was really happy, or really pissed.
The hit of coke you each did at the next red light didn’t slow him down at all.
He had great speakers in his truck so blasting music was an elevated experience, and rolling the window down to let the wind whip through your hair only made it better.
“Hey, hey, hey,” Rafe said in rapid succession, swatting at your thigh. You sat up with a start, not realizing you closed your eyes or that you had sunken into your seat. He pointed out the windshield at something up ahead, off to the side of the road. You doubted he’d noticed your brief zone-out. “You see that?”
You leaned forward and peered out the window, squinting to try and make out the figure clearly in the dark. “I think it’s a person,” you said. The closer you got, the more his headlights lit up the scene. “On a motorbike.”
“I think it’s JJ,” Rafe guessed. “He drives one of those, doesn’t he?”
You shrugged. You knew JJ—and his friends—but it wasn’t like you were friends. You only knew him because everyone in Kildare knew everyone. You didn’t concern yourself with Pogues the way Rafe did. While he would seek certain ones out to harass, you didn’t bother with anything to do with the Cut unless it directly affected you, which it hardly ever did.
That being said, when the person on the bike looked over his shoulder, it was clearly JJ. He wasn’t even wearing a helmet.
Your body was thrown as Rafe sharply jerked the wheel. Tires screeched against the pavement as the truck swerved up behind JJ as if Rafe were about to totally take him out. His truck was huge, it would be easy. Your gasp turned to a cackle as he yanked the wheel back the other way. You lunged across the truck and slammed your hand down on the horn, blaring it as Rafe let the truck swerve again.
Rafe let out a vicious laugh when JJ twisted the bike too fast in an attempt to avoid the truck and wiped out. In the side mirrors you saw he had veered into the grass. You guessed he’d skidded on the road first. You didn’t look back to see if he stood up, you were too busy watching Rafe with glee, a wicked smile plastered on your own face as he floored it down the street.
You’d been to Topper’s house on more than one occasion, and it was a party, so it wasn’t as if you were going to knock. You tugged at the skirt of your dress then barged inside, Rafe right at your back. Loud music, overlapping voices, and the smell of beer and weed filled your senses. Already energized, you moved through the crowded space with ease. You were in your element. People even parted to make way for you, but that could’ve been a perk of having Rafe looking like your bodyguard.
Rafe was here on business, not to get drunk and dance—your two favorite things about a party—but you didn’t mind sitting by his side on Topper’s couch as he offered a bump for free to draw people in and then negotiated a price for a line. The two of you usually snorted a quarter (sometimes half) of however much coke he bought, but the rest he used to try and make his money back.
Most people were uninteresting to you, but you liked to talk to them anyways. It reminded you how unimpressive everyone else your age was, which was an ego boost for sure—although, ego certainly wasn’t something you lacked to begin with.
Curiosity led you to get distracted sometimes. When you left Rafe’s side to get a drink from the kitchen you didn’t mean to be gone for long, but some guy with black hair in a crew cut and beer breath started challenging you to go against him in cup pong. You guessed he was someone’s relative or new in town because you didn’t recognize him. He boasted how he was the best—the current champion of the kitchen—and no one wanted to play against him anymore. He gave you this stupid cocky smile—not the kind of hot-but-aggravating cocky smile Rafe got when he was right about something—but the kind that made you want to ruin his life.
That would take too long, and it was energy you didn’t want to waste on him, so you played instead. You knew kicking his ass would be satisfying before you even took your first turn, and after, you got to confirm that it was. Ruining his winning streak would be enough.
Rafe taught you to play a few years ago and you only got better, but you weren’t going to thank him or anything. At this point you could probably beat him.
You left Crew Cut in the kitchen, defeated, and stumbled back to the living room. He got a few shots in so you had had a bit to drink, but you were still fully capable. Rafe would probably be annoyed at you for being gone so long, but you figured you could bat your lashes and apologize and he’d forgive you. And if not you’d blame it on Crew Cut for keeping you hostage playing cup pong and Rafe would get his knuckles bloody. Either way, you were sitting pretty.
Except, when you spotted him on the couch, you immediately saw that no, you weren’t. Spite flared in your gut at the sight of Rafe talking to some girl. She had stubby legs sticking out of a short white dress and brown hair that might’ve been pretty if it suited her. And if she brushed it properly. You wracked your memory to put a name to the face, and by the time you had stomped your way over to them, you remembered.
You forced a grin. “Hey, Bella.”
She looked up at you and gave you a smile that felt a little too sweet. “It’s Bethany,” she corrected. Eh, you were close enough. “And hey, Y/N. I didn’t know you were here.”
You wanted to glare at her, to figure out if that was some kind of insult, but you weren’t going to let her get to you that easy.
“Well, I am, and I was sitting there, so.” You shrugged, making the message so get up clear.
“Relax,” Rafe chimed in. Your eyes found him and you knew he could see past your mask. “You did get up.”
You tilted your head. There was a sourness to his voice that only you seemed to pick up on. You flicked your eyes to Bethany, who had this newly satisfied expression on her average face, then back to Rafe.
“Yeah, and it’s not like you own the couch, so,” Bethany commented, emboldened by what she assumed was Rafe backing her up. But no, it wasn’t that. He was upset, you could tell, and he was using her to bother you.
“I just went to the kitchen to get a drink,” you explained carefully.
“You were gone for a while.” Rafe's voice was too even, too controlled.
For someone who was just your best friend, Rafe was more possessive over you than any boyfriend you’d ever had. It went both ways. He was yours just as much as you were his, and apparently Bethany hadn’t gotten the memo.
“You move your feet, you lose your seat,” Bethany piped up with this obnoxious sing-song tone. “Sorry.”
You cringed at the phrase and this time let your disgust show. “What are you, four? Grow up.”
She scoffed and looked at Rafe, seeking some kind of defense, but when he finally took his eyes off you it wasn’t to look at her. His focus fell to something past you. His jaw clenched.
“Rafe,” Bethany barked at him, demanding attention. “Are you gonna let her talk to me like that?”
You almost laughed. Who did she think she was? Rafe’s priority list was short, but it was clear who was at the top and who wasn’t even on it.
“If you went to the kitchen for a drink then where is it?”
“I drank it,” you snarked.
Rafe made a noise that said he didn’t believe you. Warmth seeped into the skin on the back of your thigh just above your knee as Rafe’s hand made contact. His thumb rubbed back and forth, but neither of you acknowledged it. You got an inkling, though, and looked over your shoulder. Sure enough, you spotted Crew Cut. He was right in Rafe’s eyeline and yep, he smiled at you. What a moron.
Rafe must’ve seen the two of you playing cup pong. You were surprised by that. Not that he’d seen, but that he had gone back to sit down instead of making his presence known sooner. You looked back at Bethany, smirking with the knowledge that you’d been right all along. He thought he could make you jealous.
Bethany noticed his hand placement, but it wasn’t like Rafe was trying to hide it. She scoffed and stood, finally understanding her place.
“You’re a jerk, you know that?” Upright she wasn’t as short as you thought, but still shorter than you, even in her heels. “So are you,” she spat at you, squaring her shoulders as if she was making some grand stand against you. “You deserve each other.”
This time you did laugh. Right in her face. How could you not?
“Calm down, you Shih Tzu.” Bethany made a sound of offense. “Go whine at someone else’s feet,” you dismissed with a wave of your hand.
The suddenness of the impact almost knocked you back. She was tiny so it wasn’t like your head was spinning from the punch. It more so caught you off guard than anything else. You did have to give her a bit of credit for that. Your nose throbbed as you brought your head back forward.
Bethany’s face was scrunched up and tomato red. The sight amused you, even as blood began to trickle from your nostrils.
“I don’t know why anyone ever said you were nice,” she sneered. If she wasn’t such an annoying little bitch you might’ve been impressed. “You wanna say anything else?
That was true, you were the nice one. That’s what made you and Rafe such a fascinating duo to the people who either knew or knew of you.
Of course, their assumptions weren’t true, but they didn’t need to know that. You didn’t have a real reason to pretend, you just did. But sometimes you didn’t bother—certain people on special occasions got the chance to meet the real Y/N.
A million lines crossed your mind from snarky remarks to scathing insults. Oh yeah, you had plenty to say.
Instead you inhaled deeply, sucking the blood back through your nose. It trickled back down your throat and once it mixed with enough saliva you spat it right in Bethany’s face. Gross, yes, but effective.
Bethany screamed. That garnered an audience. The spitty, bloody mess dripped from her face down the front of her dress. Her white dress. You smiled, not caring that blood caked your teeth. You could taste it. Who wore a white dress to a party, anyway?
Out of the corner of your eye you looked at Rafe. He’d already let his hand fall from your body. The expression on his face was a mix between annoyance from before and current amusement.
Bethany lunged at you, hands out like she was going to try and scratch you or something. She didn’t get a chance because some other girl, who you assumed must’ve been a friend, came up behind her and pulled her back. Bethany made a noise of frustration as her friend dragged her away, but she let the other girl do it anyway.
“Hey! Are you okay?” A hand landed on your shoulder and you turned. Crew Cut had wide eyes, likely having witnessed the scene.
You became aware of all the people staring at you in that moment and internally sighed.
You sniffled and wiped your nose with the back of your hand, then flinched on purpose.
“Ow,” you whined. His hands rested on both of your arms as he encouraged you to look at him. “I think it’s broken,” you whimpered loud enough for surrounding people to hear. Sounds of pity filled in around you and people started to approach. Clearly they’d all only witnessed the second half of your interaction with Bethany, which really worked in your favor.
“That girl is crazy,” some girl nearby said. “You didn’t even do anything.”
“Do you need a doctor?” someone else asked.
Tears filled your eyes. “I think so,” you croaked out to no one in particular.
A hand latched onto your bicep and pulled you away from Crew Cut and the small crowd you’d acquired.
“I’ve got her,” Rafe said firmly as he held you at his side. People started to mutter. “Come on, you’ll be okay.”
The way he said it told you he knew exactly what you were doing. Rafe knew how much you liked being the center of attention.
It didn’t stop you from milking it while you could.
“It’s not okay,” you complained. “She hit me! You saw her, Rafe!”
He leaned down to your ear, his pace quickening. “I’m not gonna fall for your shit so drop it,” he hissed.
“I don’t know if I need to go to the hospital,” you said loudly, covering for him. You put an extra touch of gratefulness to your voice. “But if you think I need to then we’ll go.”
You sniffled again, gingerly touching your nose as you walked alongside him, absorbing all the worried and supportive comments you got on your way.
They were all so busy staring at you that you doubted they could see how pissed Rafe was. Mission accomplished. He had a hard time controlling his face. They probably didn’t notice the other injury you were sustaining, either, as Rafe dug his fingers into the flesh of your arm, gripping tight as he dragged you out the door.
Rafe slowed down once you were out of the house, but still held your arm. All the action was inside so he spoke freely.
“Is your nose actually broken?”
You shook your head confidently, dropping the act from inside. “Hurts a little but it’s fine. She didn’t hit that hard, weak arms I’m guessing. Plus I always got nose bleeds easily as a kid so it looks worse than it is.”
The ease in which you explained made Rafe shake his head. You wiped your teary eyes with the back of your hand to clear up your vision as Rafe led the both of you to his truck.
“Are those even real?” he questioned, but the snark in his voice said he already knew the answer.
“No.”
If he was in a good mood, Rafe would’ve been impressed. But, he was in a bad mood, so you were faced with annoyance and anger instead.
“You’re so screwed up.”
You scoffed. “Takes one to know one,” you muttered loud enough for him to hear. “Ow!” you shrieked as Rafe applied pressure, squeezing down on your arm. “Why are you so mad at me?”
“Why do you think you can lie to me?” he snapped back.
You yanked yourself free from his hold. You’d arrived at the truck without realizing. Likely the reason he let you separate yourself—you’d end up going with him anyway.
“I told you the truth, my nose is fine. Yeah, I was faking for attention, who the fuck cares?” You crossed your arms over your chest. “That bitch still hit me. I should get a restraining order.” Rafe rolled his eyes at the dramatic yet empty threat.
Okay, so you weren’t actually going to do that, but he could show a little sympathy, couldn’t he?
“Thanks for standing back and doing nothing, by the way,” you added when he didn’t reply right away.
That provoked a reaction you wanted. Rafe took a step forward. “I’m talking about you disappearing.” Oh, yeah. “You say you’re going to get a drink, then you’re gone forever and so like a good friend I go to find you. To make sure you're okay. And then what do I see?” Rafe’s voice continued to rise with each word. “You, hanging out with some asshole!”
“What about you?” you shot back. “I go back to you and some random girl is sitting in my spot, and then you act like you can’t be bothered to back me up when she goes psycho!”
“Are you pissed because she was in your spot or jealous because she was next to me?”
“Jealous? Me?” A scoff escaped you at the accusation. Was he insane? “You have a mental breakdown because I play one dumb drinking game with a guy I don’t even care enough to learn the name of but sure, Rafe, I’m the jealous one.”
“I’m not the one who was picking fights,” he reminded, stepping closer.
“Yeah, well, she was a bitch.”
Rafe was so close he could probably hear your heart skip a beat. “So are you.”
The slap of your hand against his cheek echoed through the night air.
Your mouth fell open a little, anger melting into shock. You’d never hit Rafe before, but he was getting in your face and being a dick and you just really had to urge to. It felt long overdue, honestly. Sure, you could argue just as ruthlessly as he could, but he’d only ever gotten physical with you, not the other way around. It was never hitting, never, ever hitting, but this wouldn’t be the first time he left bruises on your arm.
The second you met him on his level, he took it further.
The air was knocked from your lungs when your chest hit the passenger door of his truck. Rafe pressed himself against your back, keeping you trapped as he heaved into your ear, “Now what made you think that would be smart?”
“Only one of us is smart and it’s definitely not you.” The retort was instinctual. Your quick replies amused Rafe most of the time, but that wasn’t the case at the moment.
“You’re so mean tonight,” he said, voice like a warning. “First you abandon me, then you make a scene, and now you’re causing problems again. I sold the rest of the coke but I might have a bump left.” God, he could be so patronizing. It was even more irritating, which was exactly what he was going for when he added, “I think you need to lighten up.”
“Fuck you,” you growled out, squirming against his hold. This was unknown territory. “Stop being a dick and let me go. This isn’t funny.”
He kept you pinned with his body, it didn’t matter that you tried to push yourself back with your palms against the car, he was solid. When his hands rose to pin each of your wrists to the window you were left completely at his mercy.
Rafe leaned down a little, his lips by your ear. Your whole body shuddered at the tickle of his breath as he whispered, “I’m not trying to be funny.” Your teeth clenched. “Are you going to behave yourself so we can go or do I need to wait? I’ve got all night.”
There was a shakiness that tangled itself into his last few words. You opened your mouth to speak but hesitated when Rafe adjusted his stance.
You didn’t let him see the smirk that crossed your face. He was aroused, you could feel him pressing against you. You wanted to say something so bad because it was obvious it was for you. Something witty, something mean, something flirty—just something. But instead you closed your mouth and let your body do the talking.
You rocked your hips back slightly. Enough to let him know you felt it, but not enough to create friction. Rafe reacted how you thought he might. His hands around your wrists tightened as he nudged himself closer to you. He let out a grunt as his cock pressed more against your ass.
Your entire demeanor shifted the second you understood you had the upper hand.
“Rafe,” you said, making your voice sound all breathless. You paired the gasp of his name with rolling your hips back shamelessly.
Rafe grunted in your ear. His hips shoved forward, almost out of his control. Heat flooded your body at the feel of him. The only barrier was your clothes and those could be easily removed.
You rolled your hips again with a giggle.
“You think you’re funny?” he growled into your ear.
You nearly choked on your own tongue. You’d always found Rafe attractive but this whole scenario just put it on another level. You pressed your thighs together to control yourself, but a shaky breath managed to escape. You were having a hard time deciphering what was authentic and what was just for fun.
One of his hands released your wrist in favor of resting around your neck. Not quite squeezing, just holding. The pressure was just enough to let you know it was there and now you were really losing your grip on this whole thing. You shivered against him, your body going rogue. So much for being in control.
Rafe leaned in even closer, his lips pressed right next to your ear as he warned, “if you don’t stop that I’m gonna have to fuck you right here.”
You swallowed hard. No words came to mind.
You and Rafe had never crossed the line in all your years of friendship, which surprised a lot of people. Sometimes you wondered about it, like now. How could you not? He was hot and so were you, and you spent nearly all your time together. Rafe understood you even when it came back to bite you. There was something about him not just toeing the line but stepping fully over it with those words that thrilled you.
You could give in. You wanted to give in because honestly the fact that you never even kissed him, let alone fucked him, was confusing to you now. It would only add another layer to the messy thing you called your friendship, but it didn’t seem like a bad idea. Not with his hand on your neck and his lips at your ear and his cock throbbing against you.
A wicked idea appeared in your head. One fueled by pettiness and your desire for control that you’d forgotten for a moment, but not forever.
Rafe had you caged but not fully trapped. You’d stopped fighting against him, so it wasn’t as hard as it should’ve been to twist your way free from his hold.
“Then let’s go,” you said, not facing him because you’d definitely break if you did.
You yanked open the passenger door and climbed into the truck. Once it shut you looked out the window and found him staring back. Confused, frustrated, and stunned. You smirked to yourself.
Rafe got it together and crossed to the driver's side. He got in without a word. His jaw was clenched too tight. His hand fell to his lap, not even hiding the fact that he was adjusting himself before starting up the truck.
The drive was so quiet it made you want to laugh. Rafe kept looking at you out of the corner of his eye, like he wasn’t sure whether to keep ignoring you or pounce on you. That was just the way you wanted it for now. Now that you knew you were something he wanted, you couldn’t make things easy for him.
You were pretty proud of yourself, honestly. Knowing you’d worked him up like this. It was his turn to suffer a little. Serves him right for earlier. You did get punched after all and he didn’t defend you the way he should’ve.
When he stopped in front of your house all you got was a sharp, “Goodnight.”
“Dream about me,” you said before you slid out and shut the truck door.
Even though you had to ice your nose, you went to bed with a smile on your face that night. Rafe probably went home and took matters into his own hands, pun intended, and you’d bet anything you were on his mind while he did.
You saw him the very next day at the country club. You caught a ride with Topper for the simple reason you knew it would get under Rafe’s skin that you didn’t ask him by default like usual.
Of course you were right. He had a certain intensity to him when he arrived at your usual table and found you and Topper too wrapped up in conversation to notice him. You did notice him, though. You just didn’t show it.
“Hey, man,” Topper greeted him finally, still chuckling from something you had said. You turned your head to acknowledge Rafe but didn’t say a word.
Usually, Rafe would sit across from you. It just made the most sense since the two of you would often get caught up in your own conversations. Topper had even opted for a seat next to the one right across from you because of this.
Instead of taking his usual spot, Rafe dragged out the chair right beside you and sat down. He didn’t acknowledge you either. Topper’s eyes flicked between the two of you, sensing something but not willing to comment on it aloud.
So, he was still pissed about yesterday. Not that it surprised you or anything. Just a very obvious observation.
Soon enough Kelce showed and it made it easier to not comment on what was going on between you and Rafe.
“How’s your nose?” Kelce asked. He ended up across from you since Rafe left that seat open.
You pressed your fingers gingerly to the bridge. “It’s a little sore but I’m okay.”
“Why’d she even hit you?” Kelce wondered.
“Y/N didn’t do anything,” Topper jumped in to defend you. Kelce didn’t necessarily have an accusing tone to his voice, but the question was enough to garner backup. “That chick was crazy.”
You fought to keep the smugness out of your smile. Most boys were easy—like Topper. When he picked you up and asked how you were feeling, you sniffled and told him you didn’t understand what happened. He told you it wasn’t your fault. Even though he’d been nowhere nearby when it happened, he sure sounded confident.
Kelce chuckled a bit. “I heard you spit blood in her face. That’s pretty wicked, Y/N. Didn’t think you had it in you.”
These two were more Rafe’s friends than your own, but you still saw them a decent amount. Enough that you had infiltrated their little trio—but you weren’t ’one of the guys’. You found girls who went out of their way to act like that annoying. You got along fine with each of them, but they weren’t the type of friends you’d hang out with without Rafe around.
Speaking of Rafe, he’d been pretty quiet since he arrived. It was the kind of quiet he got when he was agitated, but hadn’t quite reached that tipping point for today.
Just when you thought he’d be some kind of mute the rest of lunch, he made a sort of scoffing noise after Kelce’s comment.
“Well, then you don’t know her,” Rafe replied over the brim of his glass before taking a drink.
You shot him a glare. God, he was petty.
You looked at Topper and Kelce and forced a giggle. A really girly one for extra measure.
“Someone’s grumpy today,” you said in a loud whisper. The two guys smirked to themselves when you dramatically turned to Rafe. “What’s wrong? Wake up on the wrong side of the bed?” You faked a pout when you really wanted to grin. “Any weird dreams?”
Rafe faced you. He remembered your comment. One of your favorite pastimes was screwing with him just because you could.
“I slept just fine,” Rafe answered smoothly. He tilted his head a little. You narrowed your eyes. There was a look of mischief in his. “What about you?”
You nearly jumped when his hand landed on your bare thigh. The seats at the table were close enough he didn’t have to noticeably shift to make contact. Rafe raised his brows, letting his fingers kneed into your supple skin. Maybe you should’ve worn pants.
You bit your lip before turning it to a smile. “Same here.”
“Nothing keeping you up at night?” Rafe wondered less than innocently.
You shook your head. “Nope.”
He hummed. His hand slid further up your leg. “Nothing worth thinking about?”
So badly you wanted to say something snarky like, “just because you went home and got off to the thought of me doesn’t mean I returned the favor,” but that seemed like a bit much with Topper and Kelce right across the table. They didn’t get to know how clever you could be.
Speaking of the other boys, you had almost forgotten about them during your stare-down with Rafe.
“Are you guys going to the kegger at the Boneyard tonight?” Topper wondered, breaking the tension you and Rafe had created.
Rafe looked away first. “It’s gonna be overrun with Pogues,” he dismissed.
Just because of that you said, “I’m going.” Rafe threw you a glance. “What? The Boneyard is like… middle ground. There’s peace and there’s free alcohol.”
The second part was true, but the first? It depended on the night and what drama was currently going on. Some nights everyone just hung out and got drunk and had fun, and other nights there were fights that broke out. It was really just a toss of the coin.
“If you don’t go I won’t have a ride,” you told Rafe, but before he could open his mouth, you cheerfully turned to Topper. “If you’re going do you think you could give me a ride? This morning was fun, we could keep the karoke going.”
Topper blushed a little while you beamed at him. You’d gotten him to sing along to some pop songs that played on the radio—not exactly ‘karaoke’ but it had the intended effect.
No sooner than you asked was Rafe saying, “I’m going.” There was a bite to his tone that had Topper looking a little lost. Rafe’s fingertips pressed into your skin. “I didn’t say I wasn’t. I’ll give you a ride, it’s no problem.”
It was a problem, that was the point.
“Hello, gentlemen!” A waitress appeared with a big smile and too much pep in her step. You gave her a look that had her swallowing. “And lady. What can I get for you all?”
Rafe flashed her that stupid charming smile of his. The one he gave when he wanted something.
You wanted to gag when he started flirting with her, but you kept it in. It was embarrassing, honestly, for him. You wanted to smack him and tell him to stop making a fool of himself, and then you wanted to do the same to the waitress when she let out a snorty little laugh. Whatever he said wasn’t that funny, and laughing wasn’t going to get her a bigger tip.
While he was flirting and you were seething, Rafe’s hand stayed on your thigh. He rubbed little circles with his thumb and it told you where his mind really was.
When the waitress disappeared, you unclenched your jaw, which you hadn’t realized you’d done, but you didn’t speak right away. Rafe started a conversation with the guys and all you did for now was listen.
Rafe slid his hand further up, talking to them as if his fingers weren’t creeping towards your center. A thrill shot through you at the idea because all this with Rafe was new territory. The warmth in your face and your core told you to let him continue just to see what would happen—then your ego, your desire to win, took over.
You crossed your legs, trapping his hand. Sure, he couldn’t pull it away, but he also couldn’t move it closer. You chewed the inside of your cheek to keep from laughing when Rafe’s voice faltered while talking.
“You good?” you asked casually, as if you’d been up to nothing but listening.
Rafe recovered quickly. He flexed his hand a little and you squeezed it between your thighs. If he really wanted to he could probably yank himself free, but he didn’t try. He also couldn’t get any closer towards his goal. He let you have your minor win, which in all honesty it wasn’t that much of a loss to him so he could live with it, but at least you had some bit of control again.
“Why wouldn’t I be?” he asked. You shrugged, and then he went on talking again.
When the waitress returned he hardly acknowledged her, which she looked a little miffed by, but he couldn't be bothered to care about her.
This was more of a draw when it came down to it, but you could live with that—for now.
You wore your lucky pink bikini with a pair of jeans shorts over it for the kegger.
True to his word Rafe picked you up and the two of you rode together to the Boneyard. Conversation was light, both of you playing defense, not wanting to show your hand. For as much as he was eyeing you he didn’t make a move. The topics were unimportant, so much so you had already forgotten what you’d said by the time you got to the beach.
As you walked towards the shore with Rafe at your side, you admitted to yourself you didn’t exactly have a game plan. You were determined to win this little feud, but how to do that? You didn’t have that worked out. You were still bitter about the fact he hadn’t defended you, and now the whole thing with the waitress was sitting on top of that. You had to get him back and get him good—something that would make him never forget who had the power between the two of you.
And if it scared him enough to make him never flirt with another girl again? Well, you wouldn’t be opposed to hearing him out if he had any ideas for alternatives.
You could see yourself being with Rafe. You really could. Not the way that most girls could, not just because he was handsome, and rich, and charming if he put in the effort. All those things were definitely a plus, but they didn’t understand him the way you did, and he’d never bother to understand them the way he understood you.
Even if your whole night was dedicated to winning against him, when it came down to it, you were equals. That’s what made him such a challenge, and the challenge is what made him so exciting. It was why you could drive each other to the brink of insanity one night and then hang out and laugh together the next.
The thought of a truce entered your mind. Rafe’s arm kept brushing against yours as the two of you joined the party. He looked good in the shirt he’d picked out, and you noticed he was wearing the cologne you liked. He’d been at your house right on time and had gotten out to open the passenger side door for you.
“Rafe?” you said, but evidently not loud enough.
Before you could continue he said, “I’ll be back,” and disappeared off towards the keg without a further word. Not even a glance back.
You shut your mouth and frowned. Would he even be back? You let out a huff.
It didn’t matter, you weren’t going to stand around waiting for him. You couldn’t let him think that was something he could just do. Make you wait around for him. What a dick. You felt like an idiot for even letting the word ‘truce’ enter your mind.
You looked around a little aimlessly. You weren’t about to go join Rafe and your other friends—you weren’t some follower. Your eyes wandered the scattered crowds until they landed on someone that brought a grin to your face.
Go big or go home.
He was standing practically by himself at the least populated keg. You smiled to yourself as you watched the blond fill his red solo cup with beer, chug it, then immediately refill it without so much as setting down the hose.
“Hey,” you said once you’d reached speaking distance. “Don’t you usually have a group of friends you hang with? They didn’t abandon you, did they?”
JJ looked a little surprised at your presence, but when your words registered he chuckled.
“If you wanna get technical then I abandoned them,” he replied coolly.
He nodded his head towards the water and sure enough, John B and Pope were standing in a group talking. No sign of your sort of ex friend, Kiara. You weren’t besties with her the way she and Sarah had been, but you also didn’t turn around and hate on her the way Sarah had. Things had always been a little off with you and the oldest Cameron girl ever since you and Rafe became the duo that you were, so her opinion wasn’t all that defining to you the way it was to others, so Kie wasn’t so bad in your books, but you weren’t still hanging with her either. You hardly thought of her at all to tell the truth.
“What about you?” JJ raised a brow.
“All alone tonight I guess.” You sighed. JJ didn’t say anything for a moment, regarding you. You cast your eyes down to his leg and gasped. “That looks awful! Are you okay?”
There was a huge scrape on his knee with some bruising around it. You knew exactly what, well who had caused it.
JJ didn’t need to know you were in the passenger seat, or that you hadn’t given him a second thought until now.
You looked at his right arm. Gently you reached out to grab it, avoiding the freshly damaged skin. He looked taken aback, likely not expecting the softness or concern from you.
“JJ…” you continued sympathetically, tenderly brushing over the area next to the injury. “What happened?”
His cup crinkled in his fist as his body tensed. He pulled his arm from your grasp and you frowned at him. He took a sip from his drink, watching you over the rim of his cup.
He lowered it after a long drink. “Got ran off the road by that asshole you hang out with,” he finally replied, casting his eyes away.
You shook your head shamefully. “Rafe is an asshole,” you said. There was nothing disingenuous about those words at least.
JJ wasn’t sure whether to frown or laugh.
“Have you and I ever had a full conversation before?”
You smiled at the way he vocalized the first thought that came to his brain. You shook your head.
“Not a full one I don’t think. Definitely not one on one.” You paused. “We could change that, though.”
JJ’s demeanor shifted, relaxing a bit. As if it were some kind of test, he refilled his solo cup to the brim, then extended it out to you.
You weren’t one to fail a test. You accepted it with a smile and took a gulp. JJ was grinning by the time you finished with a noise of satisfaction.
“Alright, maybe I didn’t have you figured out after all,” JJ decided, raising his hands in a little surrender like you’d caught him.
“Guess not,” you agreed.
You found yourself sitting across from him right in the sand. It hadn’t bothered him so you didn’t let it seem like it bothered you. It was easier said than done with the little grains digging in and you knew they’d be stuck to you all night, but you weren’t going to start seeming like the kind of girl who complained.
JJ was fun and carefree, so you were fun and carefree. You tapped into that side of yourself and amplified it. You tried to keep some reality in whatever performance you were putting on.
“You shouldn’t itch that,” you warned. JJ had scratched at the scab on his forearm yet again. “It’ll scar worse if you irritate it.”
“I know how scars work, thanks, doc.” It was sarcastic but it wasn’t mean, which threw you off. “It’s just annoying.” He extended his leg and looked down at it. “And definitely fucked for a few weeks. Looks worse than it is, though.”
“It’s not so bad,” you offered. “And if you don’t scratch I’m sure it’ll heal just fine.” A playful smirk wandered onto your lips. “But I think it makes you look kinda tough, y’know?”
“Tough, huh?”
“I mean, not that you need it or anything.” The shy laugh that left you sounded so natural. God, you were good. “Sorry, that was weird. I just—it’ll heal, but until it does, don't worry about how it looks, is what I’m trying to say.”
“I wasn’t, but thanks.” JJ was smiling, clearly relishing in his perceived victory of managing to fluster you in so few words. “I don’t get how a sweet girl like you can hang out with a guy like Rafe.”
If only he knew.
You swallowed and shrugged. You turned your eyes down. “I don’t know either, sometimes.”
“Hey, I’m sorry,” JJ said. He moved then. You heard him. By the time you looked up, the blond was sitting by your side. He gave you a lopsided smile. “That’s nothing against you, it’s just…”
“Rafe’s an asshole?” you supplied. “We already established that, remember?” You let your voice waver just enough that JJ felt a little guilty, but also have enough humor that he knew he could fix it.
“You’re a great girl, and I’m guessing you know how I feel about Kooks. So I’m I’m not saying that lightly, alright?” JJ began playfully. You met his eyes and smiled softly. “Why do you put up with him?”
He wanted to save you. How funny.
“I… I don’t want to talk about Rafe. I wanna keep talking about you. What have you been up to this summer?”
That got him talking again. It was easier that way. You could just react; smile, nod along, make little noises or mutter a few words.
He was in the middle of yet another surfing story from the other week when you put your head on his shoulder. JJ didn’t hesitate to wrap his arm around you.
If Rafe could see you now.
It’s not that you cared where he was, or what he was doing, or who he was doing it with, but you knew he’d care what you were up to. He’d care when he found out only after the fact where you were directing your night with JJ, one of the good for nothing Pogues that he loathed.
What would he say when he found out you invited JJ Maybank into your bed when all he got was a hand on your thigh for a few minutes under a table? That would show him.
Actually, more than that, it would drive him crazy. Letting you know he wanted you, and then continuing to play games was probably the stupidest thing Rafe Cameron could’ve ever done. If it was a game you were going to win.
Who cared if it sent him over the edge? You sure didn’t.
A gust of ocean air came at the right time. You shivered dramatically and JJ frowned at you, pausing mid sentence to ask if you had a jacket. He didn’t have one to offer. That worked out just fine for you because you had an offer of your own. One you were certain he wasn’t going to turn down.
“Actually, would you mind giving me a ride back to my place? My friend kind of ditched me,” you asked politely. JJ, ever the gentleman, masked his disappointment and agreed. He got to his feet and offered a hand. “And if you want, you could stay and, I don’t know, hang out…”
JJ brows rose. “Hang out?” he parroted back to you.
You bit your lip and nodded. “Yeah. Hang out.” You brushed a lock of hair from his forehead. A grin spread across his face. “That cool with you?”
“Lead the way,” he encouraged, energy quickly returning.
You reached for his hand and he let you take it.
“You’re driving, remember?”
“Oh, yeah. I’ll lead the way.”
You laughed with him, giving his hand a little squeeze.
To be fair, JJ was very attractive. And he was not so bad to talk to. He didn’t even give you shit for being a Kook, which you had expected he would. He’d only commented on your friendship with Rafe but you’d played into that well. You’d enjoyed yourself with him. On another occasion if he had approached you, you’d probably indulge him at least for a while. Maybe even sleep with him like you were planning to now. You’d heard the rumors about him and so you were pretty confident you’d have fun.
Although, the real fun would start after, when you got to throw it in Rafe’s face and watch him lose it.
There was only one problem with your plan. Rafe spotted you before you could leave.
“Y/N!” Rafe called. You turned and so did JJ. JJ clutched your hand tighter as Rafe approached. If looks could kill, you and JJ would both be dead. You smirked to yourself. You couldn’t help it. “Where the fuck are you going?”
“Back off, Rafe.” JJ was surprised but he still managed to sound threatening. He probably didn’t think Rafe was even here since you’d failed to mention it. “You don’t own her.”
Poor, sweet, dumb, JJ.
Any other disagreement, any other issue, Rafe might’ve gone along with the back and forth for a minute. Not when it came to you.
JJ had no time to dodge before Rafe was slamming his fist into his face. You grit your teeth. Your nose twitched. Now that was a real punch. Rafe quickly followed up with another right to JJ’s stomach.
JJ fell to the ground with a grunt. You managed to drop his hand just in time. Rafe was on top of JJ in an instant, pummeling him. It was dark, but you could smell blood mixing with the scent of the sea. The sound of Rafe’s fists cracked against JJ’s face told you there’d be bruises.
JJ managed to get out from beneath him, but Rafe wasn’t about to back off. It became an all out brawl. Over you, of all things. Wasn’t that romantic? You giggled to yourself when you had to step back because JJ threw Rafe off of him. You watched with shallow, excited breaths when Rafe got back to his feet and charged.
“Hey!” someone screamed from a distance. You didn’t recognize the voice, but when you turned your head, you saw a group of partygoers approaching. “Knock it off!”
You rolled your eyes. You cleared your throat. The group was getting closer so you let loose.
“Guys! Stop it, please!” you shrieked, as if you had been begging this entire time. “Stop!”
A hand landed on your shoulder.
“Stand back, Y/N,” Topper said, blocking you with his body.
“They won’t stop,” you cried pathetically. “Someone is going to get seriously hurt!”
Topper registered your concern and then took it upon himself to intervene. John B joined him. He’d come out of nowhere. The group that had gathered around the fight had grown within seconds. Some were yelling at them to quit while others clapped and shouted encouragement.
John B pried JJ away and Topper got ahold of Rafe. JJ tried to run back at Rafe but then Pope got in front of him. You didn’t hear what he said to the blond but JJ backed down. He looked at you, still restrained by his friends after fighting for your honor. You spotted a black eye forming and a busted lip. It was pretty hot.
“Rafe, man—“
“Get your hands off me,” Rafe snapped at Topper like something feral. He got your attention without even asking. You met his gaze and he looked… well, crazy. You don’t think that would come until later. “Y/N,” he muttered your name as he approached you. “We’re leaving.”
Rafe didn’t wait for you to respond. His hand snapped out, gripping your bicep and dragging you along behind him.
You nearly stumbled over your feet from the force. Behind you there were protests, and Topper even began to follow, so you had no choice.
“It’s fine,” you called back to him. “I’m going with him.” You were sure JJ heard and for the first time in a long, long while you felt a small twinge of guilt.
It didn’t last long when Rafe shoved you against the side of his truck. He ripped open the passenger side door. The wild look in his eyes almost scared you. Almost.
“Get in.”
You obeyed. He hardly left you time to scramble in before he was slamming the door shut behind you. You watched Rafe as if he were some kind of predator, analyzing his movements as he stalked to the driver’s side and climbed in next to you.
You weren’t going to be the first one to speak. Rafe was speeding like there was no such thing as a limit. The only move you made was to buckle your seatbelt. It took a long few minutes before Rafe finally spoke.
“I told you I’d be back,” he finally grit out.
“You didn’t notice I was gone until I was leaving,” you shot back.
Rafe’s hands tightened on the steering wheel.
“I was looking for you.”
“Bullshit,” you snapped. “You didn’t give a damn where I was until I was leaving with JJ—“
Rafe slammed on the break. Your whole body jolted. The seat belt tightened against you and your head hit the head rest. Before you could scream at him your vision cleared and you realized you were in front of your house.
“Don’t say his name.” The way Rafe said it made him seem dangerous.
You looked at him, eyes wide, gauging what to do next. This was the most terrified you had ever been of him, and yet…
“Your cheek is cut,” you pointed out, voice as steady as you could make it. JJ wore rings. You bet it hurt. “Come in and let me clean it.”
You didn’t leave room for debate. You and Rafe watched one another with caution, regarding the other as a threat.
In a way you were both right.
You got out of the truck first. You made it to your door, knowing Rafe was right behind you.
You went through the motions almost robotically as you took him into the bathroom. You turned on the light and made him sit on the edge of the tub. The first aid kit was in the cabinet and you found everything you needed right inside.
For knowing you had caused all of this, you weren’t exactly sure what to do now. Which was odd, because you always seemed to figure out the next step one way or another, but right now, cleaning Rafe’s cheek with an alcohol wipe, watching his jaw tense with the stinging pain, you were unsure how to proceed.
What do you do when you get your way, or at least you think you got your way, but not in the way you had planned?
Rafe swatted your hand away when you tried to open a bandaid.
“Don’t put that thing on me, it’s fine,” Rafe protested. He placed his hands on your hips. You thought he was going to push you back, but he just sort of held you in place.
“Don’t be a baby.”
Rafe ignored you. He dropped his forehead to your stomach. It was almost as if you were an altar for him to worship at. You ran a hand through his hair, finding the sight to be nothing short of beautiful. You couldn’t help yourself.
He muttered something that sounded like, “Why do you do this to me?” You didn’t answer. He took a breath. “Were you gonna fuck him?” Rafe asked. You were sure of his words this time.
You could lie, you thought, but then decided against it. There was no point now.
Rafe tilted his head up, blue eyes searching yours. There was a sense of longing in them that you noticed every once in a while. That sad little need for approval that he couldn’t get rid of.
“Yeah, probably,” you admitted.
Fire ignited in his eyes.
Just as quickly as he became weak to you, Rafe snapped out of it. He was on his feet in seconds. He towered over you, backing you up with each step until you hit the edge of your counter.
Rafe looked down his nose at you. “Were you gonna fuck him?” he asked again, as if intimidation would change your answer.
You stared up at him, defiant. “Yeah,” you repeated, hopping up to sit on the counter. “Probably.”
Rafe’s bruised hand reached up to cup your face. He watched his thumb as it ran over your lips. When it rested on your bottom lip you opened your mouth. Rafe was transfixed as he slid the digit in. Your mouth enveloped him, swirling your tongue around his thumb. You swore you could taste a little blood.
Rafe made a noise of satisfaction and quickly removed it, covering your lips with his own, filling your mouth with his tongue instead. You moaned into the kiss. It was harsh and hungry. Everything that had been building up over the past day, hell, past years, was finally spilling out. The dam had finally broken. There was no turning back.
“You make me crazy,” he grunted against your lips when he came up for air. You panted, words failing to form as his hand slid between your bodies. “And I know I make you crazy.” His fingers slipped into your shorts and bikini bottom, which you hadn’t even gotten to show off. You hadn’t needed to. You gasped as he pressed a finger into your core. He grinned at the wetness that had already formed. “I know it ‘cause I know you.”
Rafe pressed a kiss to your lips, then your cheek, then your ear.
“Rafe,” you whispered his name, bucking against his hand. He rewarded you with pushing another finger in and thrusting them both with precision.
“I’m the only one that knows you,” he hissed. You shivered as his breath hit your ear, noting the anger. But there was something else to it. “I’m the only one who gets to have you.”
Desperation.
Rafe was desperate for you. For you to understand, for you to agree, for you to feel the same. Desperate for you to want him the way he wanted you.
“Tell me you weren’t,” he pleaded, voice shaking with the rage he was trying to contain.
He wanted you to lie.
“I wasn’t.” Rafe hummed and pressed an approving kiss to your neck. He twisted his fingers inside you, forcing a moan past your lips. His teeth sank into the skin of your neck, sucking and biting as you managed to gasp out, “I wasn’t, I swear.”
Rafe pulled his fingers from you and you whined at the loss. He made up for it by kissing his way back to your lips, swallowing your sounds. He popped the button off your shorts and tucked his hands into the waistband. You lifted yourself long enough for him to yank down your shorts, leaving you bare.
You wrapped your arms over his shoulders and kissed him harder when his hands gripped your waist and pulled you to the edge of the counter. Your teeth sank into his bottom lip, drawing an animalistic sound from him.
“Tell me you want me,” Rafe managed.
You pulled back, eyes flicking from his swollen lips to his hungry eyes. The corner of your lip quirked up a little.
“I thought it was obvious,” you mused, reaching between your bodies.
“I’m gonna fuck you either way, so you might as well just tell me.” There was a devious glint in Rafe’s eyes that sent a jolt of excitement through you.
You pulled your lip between your teeth and you undid his belt. You reached into his pants and found his cock hard and waiting for your touch. Rafe’s hands tightened on your thighs. “I want you, Rafe,” you said exactly what he wanted to hear, voice heavy with lust, every word the truth.
Rafe surged forward, capturing your lips. He shoved his pants down as you stroked him, but he had plans of his own. Rafe pushed himself closer to you, spreading your legs apart with his hips, and gripped his cock. The head pressed at your entrance and you nearly choked when he thrust in with no further warning.
“Fuck, Rafe,” you cursed. Your hands found his back, holding on as he invaded your body.
Thick and long, his cock split you open. Rafe grunted, mouth moving over you in a frenzy, kissing wherever he could reach in that second. Your top came off somewhere in the haze and you moaned as his mouth latched onto your breast. Your legs wrapped around his waist as your cunt squeezed him. Rafe’s hands found your waist again, holding you in place as he began to move.
He gave you little time to adjust but you would’ve gone crazy if he waited any longer. Rafe pulled back, letting you feel the thick drag of his cock leaving you, before he thrust in again. And again. And again. All you could do was hold on as he slammed into you, letting everything that had built up go. You welcomed it. All his anger and lust and frustration and love and just everything. Everything said and unsaid between the two of you was finally getting a resolution.
Rafe’s mouth found its way back to your neck, licking and sucking and biting your flesh. He was marking it, marking you, for the world to see. So when they saw the purple marks decorating your neck, everyone would know you belonged to him. But didn’t they know already? To some degree?
It didn’t matter to Rafe. He was making it clear. There was no room for doubt now.
Rafe fucked you like it was the last thing he’d ever do, like it was the only thing he ever wanted to do. Your moans filled the room, your curses and his grunts of your name, the sound of skin against skin, the smell of sex—all of it flooded your senses in the most thrilling way. You wanted nothing more than Rafe and nothing less than everything he was giving you.
The pleasure he inflicted was like nothing you had ever experienced and you knew in that moment nothing and no one would ever compare to the high you felt with him.
He pounded into you hard, sending jolts of electricity through your entire body. Your thighs clenched around his waist, your legs holding him against you. Rafe filled you entirely, drawing out every animalistic need you had.
“Fuck,” he cursed, lifting his head. You moaned at just the sound of his voice. “You’re so tight. Like you’re made for me.”
Your cunt clenched around him, eyes fluttering shut as your slick walls squeezed him. Your body tensed and your breaths grew even more ragged as he pushed you closer and closer towards your edge.
“Rafe, don’t stop,” you gasped out.
His hand found your throat. Your eyes snapped open as he gave it a squeeze. He forced you to meet his gaze. You nearly fell apart just from that.
“It’s always been me, hasn’t it?” he asked, wanting an answer. You nodded because yes, yes it has. “It’s always going to be only you and only me. Only me.” You nodded again, lips only parting to let out a moan when he gave a sharp thrust. “Tell me.”
“You, Rafe,” you fumbled out. “It’s always been you—it's only you,” you said in almost a plea. “I want us.”
That was exactly what he wanted to hear. Rafe gave a sound of approval and a light squeeze of your neck. His thrusts stayed sharp and precise and soon enough you were falling apart in his hold.
His cock shoving into you, his hand on your neck, the look on his face—you were consumed by Rafe and you wouldn’t have had it any other way.
You let out a cry of his name when your orgasm hit. It crashed over you in a wave, rocking your entire body. Your legs and cunt both tightened, holding him impossibly close inside you. Rafe’s lips devoured yours, smothering your moans and whimpers as you shook against him.
Rafe gave a few more rough, constricted thrusts before a deep groan escaped his lips. His hips stilled and warmth flooded your insides. He shivered against you when you slid your hands beneath his shirt and dragged your nails along his back.
His hand finally left the front of your neck, but it didn’t go far as he slid his palm to cup the back of it. Rafe pressed his forehead to yours, both of you catching your breath.
You took one hand and reached for him, running your fingers over the cut on his cheek.
“I still think you should put a bandaid on it,” you managed, voice weak.
Rafe chuckled, shaking his head as he pulled away. And just like that you two were all good again.
“I think I’ll pass.”
You smiled and rolled your eyes. “You’re so stubborn.”
“Takes one to know one. Took you this long to admit you wanted me.”
You gawked at that. “I admitted I wanted you? Seems like it was the other way around. In fact—“
But before you could finish, Rafe silenced you with a deep kiss. His cock twitched inside of you and you couldn’t help but giggle against his lips.
Rafe was only kissing you to shut you up because you were right, and he knew it too. You were always right and Rafe was going to have to learn to accept that one way or another.
#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron#rafe cameron imagine#mean!rafe#mean!reader#rafe cameron smut#obx#outer banks#quin-ns writing
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i can see you
james potter x best friends sister!reader (smut)
summary: james develops a strange feeling for sirius’ sister (reader) when she comes to london once her job required her to move. he first off thought she was a shitty person, an awful one with an awfully pretty face. so when sirius offers for her to stay in their loft until she finds an apartment, he decides he’s going to make her want to get out of there as fast as possible, until he wants her to stay more than anything in this whole world.
a/n: omg im so sorry this took so long, i tried my best w this one. also, english isn’t my first language so sorry for any mistakes. inspired by i can see you - taylor swift
warnings: mdni. smut with plot, afab!reader, use of she/her pronouns in reference to reader, use of y/n (I AM SORRY), afab!reader, being shorter than james, muggle & modern day!au, chef!peter, ships included (dorlene, marylily, wolfstar), swearing, cuddling, mentions of alcohol and drinking, a lot of physical touch, kind of public??, kissing, praise, v soft dom!james, fingering, oral (m receiving), light choking, size kink??, penetration, unprotected (don’t do this please), overstimulation
for the past two years, you started to have weekly calls with your brother, to update him on your life and know what’s happening on his.
you got transferred to london because of your job, you couldn’t find any apartments online and you were supposed to move the other week, being really desperate you told him about it, hoping he knew a real estate agent or something like that, but you were incredibly caught by surprise with his answer.
“thats such nonsense, you should just stay in my empty room until you find another place.” sirius said, his phone on speaker as he made a sandwich in the kitchen. james eyed him with a confused look on his face, but sirius decided to ignore it.
“really?” you ask, hopeful, you really could take a break from looking for apartments.
“of course. i mean, remus has practically moved into my room, so we just need to take some stuff of his out, but yeah, its no big deal.” james couldn’t help but look at him like he was crazy, remus’ room was right next to his, hell, remus’ room had a bathroom adjoined to his. james was starting to feel faint.
as soon as sirius got off the phone with you, he started blabbing.
“what the fuck, sirius?!” james said loudly, sirius sighed, putting his sandwich harshly on the plate.
“what now? i’m really just trying to eat here”
“your sister? really?” he looked like he was about to faint.
“she’ll pitch in on the rent, don’t worry about that” your brother tried to get him calm.
“oh please, i dont care about that! you know how i feel about sharing spaces” he was getting stressed, he couldn’t help it. “and you know how i feel about your family, i have been telling you to be more careful these past years but you don’t listen at all!”
it really had to be remus’s room? couldn’t peter just switch rooms and lend her his instead?
“she’s not like my parents, and neither is regulus, they didn’t do anything” sirius paused, “do your best friend a favor, will you?” and he knew he was going to.
“she’s not messy or nosy or anything like that, right?” james asked, giving into it fully.
“please, shes a cleaning freak, she’s worse than my mother” he paused. “that’s an exaggeration but she’s not messy at all, i swear. you wont even notice she’s around.” james doubted that, but he knew how much sirius missed his siblings, and he knew how fond sirius was of you.
james swore to himself he was going to get you to leave either way, he didn’t want you there and he didn’t care if he had to pay more rent because of it. he didn’t like you, he never did. even in school, before the whole sirius moving out thing, he felt weird around you. and he remembered that feeling very well, even if it was many years before, he didn’t feel like he could forget.
-
your moving truck arrived at the building a few hours before you, but when you got there, sirius had already arranged your furniture, which did make you a bit emotional. he had even bought a toothbrush, carefully arranging it in the right side of the cabinet, the side that pointed towards the door of the bathroom that led to your room.
the boys came to pick you up at the train station, you recognized them from sirius’ social media. they were everywhere.
you were extremely confused on why all of them had come and pick you up, you were hoping to see your brother standing awkwardly, instead he was there with all of his roommates. you felt like you were a teenage girl again, trying to talk to your brother during lunch, but his friends were always around.
you recognized remus from the photos he sent you, and peter was always on the background of your calls with him baking something.
and then there was james.
james potter. you didn’t know how to feel about him anymore. when your brother first introduced you, you found him attractive, but then you hated him.
when your brother ran away to his home you couldn’t help but hate him.
sure, your house wasn’t the best place in the world, but he took away your older brother, how were you supposed to feel?
as time passed you started to tolerate his presence. now you really don’t care about him, but he sure looked better than he usually did many years before.
-
you felt like you could kill him.
after living with james for a month you found him obnoxious, rude, annoying and a few other things you were too lazy to mention.
but the thing you hated the most was how invasive he could be.
you barged into his room, he was laying there, crumbs all over his red shirt.
"you should learn how to knock" he rolled his eyes when he said it, your brows furrowed.
"you ate my brownies." you had baked a few because it was bring your kid to work day and you were in charge of the snacks.
“they were really good, i thought peter made them” james paused. “he runs a restaurant downtown, you know, he’s always baking and-“
“i’m gonna have to make a whole new batch. you ate like ten of them.” you were about to get a really bad headache depending on his answer.
“i told you, they were really good.”
if you were in a cartoon you would’ve turned red and there would be smoke coming out of your nostrils and your ears. you had no comment.
you hated when he did that, just compliment you so you couldn’t really hate him that much anymore.
he used your shampoo, but it smelled really nice.
he ate your leftovers, but you really know how to order chinese food.
he even wore one of your biggest shirts you bought when you were in college because you were too lazy to buy pajamas and suddenly that shirt was really nice, because, sure, james potter actually listened to avril lavigne.
he shrunk one of your favorite sundresses, you almost cried that day and he never even apologized.
the list went on and on, and somehow, every compliment of his sounded like he was taunting you, making fun of you right in front of your face and all you could ever do was thank him.
maybe that’s just how you were, polite no matter what. but you sure didn’t want to be polite to james that day.
“no, you don’t get to do that” you felt like you were being crazy.
“what do you mean?” he chuckled. he so did not chuckle.
“you don’t get to compliment me! that doesn’t bring my brownies back!” the word brownie sure sounded stupid in that moment.
“i’ll bake more for you, but they’ll suck, you know that” he actually sat on the bed to argue, how kind of him.
“the kids will probably die if they eat your brownies.”
“you’re feeding children? where do you even work?” he looked so confused and you kept getting angrier.
“do i really look like the kind of person who would eat a hundred billion thousand brownies? god, james, why can’t you just not touch my shit?”
“that’s not even a real number and there were a lot of them! i thought it wouldn’t make a difference!”
“it wouldn’t, if you had eaten one or two, but you ate half of them!”
“oh please, lets put it to a maximum of 25%, alright?” you felt like you were going absolutely insane. he was probably going to get you in a mental hospital and you’d be walking around, looking half dead, murmuring ‘brownies brownies brownies, i want my brownies back’.
you decided to just give up, slamming the door the hardest you could while heading out.
-
as halloween came around, the bickering with james stopped, you didn’t quite know if it was because of the season or you just got used to each other, but you didn’t mind it much. he could be very exhausting when upset, and you were sure you could too.
you loved fall, maybe it was that you were in a great mood. pumpkin flavored stuff, candles and everything else included.
on the day before halloween, you woke up early, you had to go apartment hunting and once you got back you would try and help peter make deserts. even though your ghost shaped cookies look like very sick jellyfish, you wanted to help. it was the most you could do, you weren’t paying rent, sirius wouldn’t let you. and they were going to throw a party on the next day so you wanted to help them get everything settled.
when you got home you were so incredibly tired, you had spent all day out and it was already 9pm. you had to walk so much you felt like you were your feet would fall off because they were used more on that day than they were your entire life. you were more upset you didn’t get to help with the food though, the pain didn’t really matter that much compared to that.
you just wanted to lay on your bed, put your feet up and-
giggles.
there were giggles coming from your room.
and then you remembered it, the neighbors, a few girls that went to the same school as you and were very good friends with your brother were staying over. a big slumber party of some sort, you and james were sleeping in the living room, because, of course, the four girls formed two couples and they would sleep together separately. no actual bed for you tonight! you really liked them though, so you couldn’t complain.
you knocked on the door to your own room and marlene opened it, cheeks flushed, and you could see dorcas on your bed, doing something on her phone.
“hi, lene” you decided to call her that because sirius called her that, it was cute. “sorry for bothering you both, i just wanted to get my pillow, my blanket and change real quick”
“oh sure, come in” she opened the door and you went straight for the drawer under the bed, grabbing a light green heavy one, you usually used that on winter but it was a cold night and you didn’t really want to bother them by taking your usual one from off the bed.
you never changed clothes so fast, tossing them in the laundry bin along with a shit ton of james’ shirts that were on his side of the sink.
“thank you, have a nice night”
you sighed while going to the living room, to find james sitting on the armchair, shirtless and wearing sweatpants, drinking a beer and watching that 70s show (again). you decided to ignore how good he looked and just get some rest because you really didn’t want go think about james in that moment, or ever as a matter of fact.
you lay down on the couch and throw the blanket over your head.
“you know what bums me out about this show?” james says abruptly, like you would really like to know. you grunt, waiting for his answer. “they really didn’t know when to stop it, its only good until what? season-“
“james, im really tired, i just wanna get some rest, please” you get out from under the covers to say that, so he ignores it fully.
“how did apartment hunting go?” he asks, pausing the episode and asking alexa to turn on some playlist with songs a sad dad would listen to.
“shitty, theres not one good place up for rent in this city, its actually sick”
“yeah, thats tough” he pauses for a brief moment “come here” he said, patting his knee. was he asking you to sit on his lap? was he going fucking crazy?
“i’m sorry, what?” you were so confused, since when was he like that to you?
“get up, sit here with me a little.” were you dreaming? was this one of those weird wet dreams you had in high school?
“james, i’m really tired, my back hurts and i really want to lay-“
“i’ll give you a massage, it’s whatever” he answered, a sad puppy look on his face.
you gave in. you walked over to him and sat on the arm of the chair, but he pulled you onto his lap.
“i need to be close to you, if i’m not it’s really awkward and uncomfortable.” some song you didn’t know was playing.
it was slow and sounded old, you didn’t recognize it.
“james come on, im really tired.” you say, smiling though, you didn’t know why he was doing this. he must’ve had an awfully good day.
“just for a bit.” why were his hands on your waist? why were you nervous. you nodded, you felt that if you opened your mouth to speak, nothing would come out.
you could feel his breathing on your neck, his hands roaming your waist as he lead them up to your shoulders.
his hands were on the low of your back, under your shirt. that was certainly new, and that was really not a massage, but you weren’t complaining.
you looked back at him, wide eyed, what was he doing?
once you turned your face to look at him, you couldn’t look away anymore.
maybe it was how nice he looked in the paused lighting of the tv, maybe it was how warm he felt, when the weather was so chilly recently, whatever it was, it hooked you.
he was looking straight into your eyes and you felt so open to him, it was weird to see him like this.
you felt like you were back in school being head over heels for your brother's best friend.
you heard keys jingling outside, so you stepped away, leaving him sat by himself wondering what he did wrong. sirius opened the door abruptly, scaring james, who looked at him confused.
“sorry, mate, the door was … hey! is that my instrumental playlist?” james turned a bit pink.
“yeah, I was just...” he looked at you. “forget it.” he turned it off. you were pretending to be unbothered, looking at something on your phone.
you couldn’t quite wrap your mind around what had just happened.
you unfolded the sofa into a bed, getting comfortable on the right side, but then you felt his eyes back on you as sirius went into his own room.
“oh, sorry. do you want the couch? i can sleep on the chair, i don’t really-“
“we can share. don’t worry about it.” you nod at his comment. what had gotten into him? he turned off the lights, leaving the tv on. you were trying to calm down, sleeping in the same place as him, being nervous about it was so silly, but, still, you could feel your heartbeat.
“you wanna pick something?” he interrupted your thoughts, you didn’t want to watch anything. you wanted it to be over as soon as possible.
“no, you can just go back to your thing, i don’t mind it.” you answered. he laid down by your side.
fuck.
you were going to share the damn blanket.
he unpaused the tv, putting the remote on the right arm of the couch, that was your side. his arm went over you, he wrapped his arm around your waist once he went back to his side, though half of it was empty.
was he trying to spoon you? you could feel yourself getting nervous, your body starting to feel hot.
you (stupidly) decided to test his actual intentions with that, turning to your side to see if he’d pull you in, he quickly did.
you could have died right there.
he had never even hugged you before, was he really horny or something? and so you felt it.
‘oh my god.’ you thought to yourself repeatedly.
you felt his hand on your waist, pulling you closer to him, which was basically impossible with your ass already glued to his crotch.
you ended up sleeping like that, waking up in the morning to the ‘are you still watching?’ screen.
the day was fine, and you found out you and James had a lot in common, you ended up talking the entire evening, he spent the whole party next to you.
you slept in separate rooms at night, but you still spent a while with him in his room talking about all sorts of things. you never imagined how you and james could be alike. you never imagined how he could be so sweet, funny and nice.
after the fall holidays you and james became closer and closer, when labor day came up you realized how much you liked him and when thanksgiving came around, you realized how you might actually be falling for him.
he didn’t help with that at all. he was always touching you, you even ended up cuddling when you would watch some awful movie in his room.
you never really got if he liked you as a friend or he wanted something more, until christmas.
you carefully placed your gifts under the tree on christmas eve, so in the morning when you saw a little box with your name on it, you were incredibly excited.
everyone was sat on the living room floor, opening gifts. in the little box was an envelope and it was from all of the guys. there was something written in the paper inside but you didn’t want to read it at the moment.
“thanks” you smiled, but you didn’t quite know what it meant.
“we all talked and we want you to put your name on the lease.” sirius said quickly, looking at you anxiously.
“like, actually?” you ask, starting to feel extremely happy because you loved living with them.
“yeah” remus answered, smiling.
“thanks, i really appreciate it.” you couldn’t stop smiling, it felt great to know they wanted you there. james, who was sitting next to you, gave you a one arm hug and a kiss on the forehead.
“so you’re gonna let me pay rent now?” you ask to your brother, smiling.
“i guess so.” he replied. you knew he was happy too. “gonna get you an actual gift though”
they were planning a big christmas party, they invited some people from work, the girls and some other people you didn’t really know, so you were expecting to spend the night with james. you went all out, put on your favorite red dress which was short but still fancy for the event.
once you were ready, half of the party was already there, including all of james’ coworkers and friends. you sat next to him on the couch, they were all there all talking about something from his work you didn’t really understand.
they were all dressed up too, but what shocked you the most was that james was wearing a suit, sure, his necktie was already loose and the buttons on his shirt too, but he looked amazing.
“can i stay with you for the rest of the night? i don’t really know anyone here.” you whispered into his ear, nervous about the answer.
“sure” he nodded. “hey, henry” he called for his coworker that was sitting on the arm of ouch.
“yeah?” the guy answered.
“this is y/n, the friend i was telling you about the other day.” james gestures to you. you can’t help but smile awkwardly and wonder what he said about you.
“oh, hi! pleasure to meet you.” he got up from his chair and shook your hand, smiling at james and nodding. what did that mean?
“pleasure to meet you too.” you smile at him.
“i’m just gonna get some drinks, i’ll ill be right back. do you want something?” james asked you.
“just a soda.” he gets up and heads to the kitchen.
“so, tell me, how are your brownies?” henry jokes, you look at him confused.
“good, i guess, but thats a biased opinion.” you answer, curious on how he knew about your brownies.
“you know, james talks about you all the time.” he comments, you were sure he already had a few drinks.
“really? what does he say?”
“when you first moved in he hated you, you know? he always said it was fun to make you mad and all. but since october he’s been so nice when he talks about you, i personally think he fancies you, but i wouldn’t know. i don’t think he’d tell me if he did, specially because you’re his friends sister and all.” he was rambling but you really enjoyed the part he said about james seeing you as more than a friend, you enjoyed it so much you didn’t even pay attention to what he said after that.
“i doubt it, we just turned into good friends, that’s all.”
“nah, i think he wants to make you into something else.” henry might’ve just made your entire night with that phrase. you couldn’t hide your smile anymore.
“here’s your soda, a beer for you, henry” james handed the drinks and took a sip of his coke. you sat next to him, holding your soda in both of your hands, looking down at it nervously. “did something happen?” he asked you.
“no, just thinking ‘bout something” you answer, looking into his eyes now. he smiles, wrapping his arm around your waist. that makes you so flustered, you feel your entire body getting warmer and that’s just the start of it.
for the rest of the night, he stayed by your side. his hand resting on your waist, thigh, around your shoulders, wherever he wanted them. you could feel your heart beating in your chest for most of the time. he had never done that before, not in public and surely not like that, not in a sexual manner, at least that’s how you identified it, because one thing was a friendly touch, the other was what he was doing.
he made you feel needy, aching for more - he was making you want him.
did he notice? did he ever even perceive how he made you feel? how could he not?
goosebumps covered you once he grazed your thigh for the first time out of five, the fifth was when he finally let his hand stay put there.
it made you feel crazy, it really did.
you didn’t know if he meant it as you took it, but you really hoped he did.
the party was still going around 1am, james had disappeared and you were left sitting on the couch, waiting for him to come back.
you couldn’t stop thinking about him and it made you feel kind of silly. you were a bit disappointed that nothing happened but you sort of expected it. you knew nothing would actually occur, but still, it made you a bit sad. maybe the touch lead you on, but it-
you looked at your phone once it vibrated and you felt the absolute need to scream because of how excited the text made you, but you didn’t.
‘James: come to my room once you read this, please.’
you didn’t think much of it, though you would’ve come if he just asked you to like he normally did.
you finished your drink and knocked on his door. he opened it but didn’t look at you, his eyes were focused on your knees, he looked nervous.he was still wearing his pants and the dress shirt, except it was unbuttoned. shit.
“y/n?” he was looking at you now.
fuck.
“yeah?”
“you look really good tonight.”
“i clean up nice sometimes.” you smile.
“oh please, you always look good” he turned a bit pink once he said it. “and thats a really nice dress” his voice was low when he said it, was he actually hitting on you?
“thank you” you whispered, you couldn’t help but feel anxious as his body got closer to yours.
“you know, i’ve been thinking about something for a while now” he says. you could feel your stomach start to twist and turn because you were so anxious on what he was doing next. you hummed, making sure he would continue what he was saying, but he didn’t.
he just kissed you like it was the easiest thing in the world. he pulled you into his room and closed the door, locking it quickly.
the feeling of his lips on yours was something you craved for a while now, you needed it so much you started to wonder if it was normal for you to need something this much.
you couldn’t stop once it started. his hands were on your hips and you tugged onto his hair desperately.
kissing him is redefining the whole concept of kissing to you, and probably ruining every other sexual experience you could have for the rest of your life.
he pushed you into the door, his hands now on your ass.
“shit” he let out quickly as he stopped kissing you so roughly and started giving you quick pecks. “you have no idea how long i wanted to do this.” you hummed. “you’re so fucking hot, it makes me crazy.” the praise was making your stomach twist again, a wet spot being formed between your legs.
he carried you with your legs around his body and took you to his bed. the same bed you have used to lay down to watch movies, to just gossip or discuss things, to do whatever.
he sat down and kept you on his lap, straddling him, but you needed more. as he kissed you roughly and messily you would casually rock your hips, causing friction. after you did that a few times he laid you down on the bed, telling you to stop being such a tease, he got on top of you, supporting himself with his knees, one of them between your legs, causing friction and making you more aroused.
when he started playing with the strings that held the dress together, you knew you were done for, so you let him undo the bow, kissing your neck. he was messy, sometimes he would bite and it would send bolts of electricity down your spine.
“james…” you let out as he bit you again.
“tell me” he said, trailing his kisses down to your clavicle. “can i take this off too?” he asked, playing with your bra. you nodded but he didn’t move an inch.
“i need to hear you say it. can i take this off?” he was such a fucking tease, it made you go crazy. he loved to hear your voice, he knew you wanted him to take it off, he just liked to hear you say it.
“yes, please” you struggled to hold in a moan once he started sucking on your neck.
“thank you” he answered, looking back to the hickey he gave you. “hmm, that’s gonna leave a mark, sorry baby” baby? he had never called you that, you hummed as he took off his collared shirt and then proceeded to take off your bra . he groaned at the sight of you, which drove you mad. his growing bulge was exposed.
he was big.
you immediately regretted every single time you had made a small dick joke (sure, there were only 2 times but they did happen).
he was on his knees, towering over you.
“you’re so pretty”, he leaned down to kiss you again, this time more eager than ever. his right hand cupped your jaw as his left one roamed your body, making you ache for more and more. “i really wanna touch you” he whispered and went back to kissing you, his left hand now between your thighs, waiting for permission to move.
“please” you whisper, stopping the kiss briefly. he kept on kissing you as he stimulated you through the fabric of your underwear, but that didn't happen for long, especially because of how wet it was, he needed to touch you, he couldn't help himself. the dress was so hiked up it looked like a shirt, but instead of helping you take it off, he pulled it down a bit, so he had access to your chest. he immediately started kissing around your left tit, making you go absolutely insane. and that combined with the sudden touch to your clit? yeah, you were getting fucked up that night.
he was better than anyone had ever been to you. sucking in your nipple and fingering you slowly, he was making you go crazy, needing him more.
he stopped sucking on your nipple and went back to your neck, his hand not stopping at all. the right one went to cover your mouth as you moaned.
“be quiet, hm? want everyone to listen? don’t wanna stuff that pretty mouth of yours too” his non dominant hand went to your neck, choking you lightly as his other one fucked into you. you were so close to cumming, with his thumb stimulating your clit as his other fingers went in and out of you, he knew that you were close, specially with the way your pussy was tightening around him. “so fucking tight, aren’t you? can’t imagine how you’re gonna feel around my cock” he stopped and took his fingers out, making you whine, missing the feeling of him.
“jameees” you moan, finding the courage in you to pull him in, giving him a kiss.
“take it off”
“what?” you’re confused.
“the dress, i really wanna fuck you in it but i don’t wanna ruin it.” he lets out. “take it off” he sounded like he was ordering you, and you loved it so much, you wanted to give something back to him.
“i will, but can i suck you off first?” you ask, looking at him doe eyed, and how could he say no?
“you really want to?” he asks, furrowed brows, you nod, quickly getting on your knees as he unbuckles his belt, throwing it on the carpet. he got up and pulled his pants down, staying just in his boxers, he climbed back into bed with you, kissing you sweetly.
you were on your knees in front of him, pulling his cock out of his underwear, stroking it lightly then kissing the tip. you take him in your mouth, using your hands to stroke what couldn’t fit, which, frankly, was about a bigger portion of it. he was the biggest you ever had.
“fuck” he groaned at the movements you were making, using his left hand to get strands of hair out of your face, as his right one supported him on the bed. he was trying not to thrust into your mouth but you were making it so hard. “your mouth was made for me, baby” he whispered, looking into your eyes. his free hand went to your neck, choking you just a bit, as your head bobbed up and down, taking as much as possible.
“so good, your mouth feels so goddamn good honey” he groaned as he finished the sentence and you used your non dominant hand to cup his balls. he was moaning a bit and it was the hottest thing you’ve ever seen or heard, though you were sure you would see hotter things that same night. he started thrusting lightly, he couldn’t help himself, specially with how good your mouth made him feel.
“stop” he ordered you, and so you did, a pop sound being made as you stopped sucking and looked up at him.
“did i do something wrong?” you ask, brows furrowed. his hand hasn’t left your neck, and so he pulls you in by it. his tongue went straight in your mouth, he needed to taste him on your lips.
“i wanna fuck you” he said, looking into your eyes, waiting for any kind of response.
“yes. please do” you quickly say, kissing him quickly.
“the dress” he remembers and you quickly take it off, not stopping the staring for a second.
“want you down on all fours” he says, getting on his knees. you do as he commands, getting in an arch position as he’s on his knees behind you. he can see that you still haven’t taken off your underwear, he bites on your ass cheek and then pulls it down with his teeth.
“you don’t mind if i keep this, don’t you?” he asks, helping you take it off fully. “it’s already ruined”
“it’s yours” you look back at him, he’s smirking like the devil. he throws your underwear into his bedside drawer.
“gotta keep it safe” he whispers. you can feel his bulge through his boxers as he leans in to kiss your neck, you whine, needing him more.
“patience, i’m gonna give it to you, sweetheart” his right hand gave your ass a smack. “up” he said, signaling for you to arch your back even more. as you do so, he groans, pressing his covered member against your wet cunt.
“you’re so pretty like this, all for me?” he asked, using his hand to play with your clit.
“y-yes, all yours” you said, trying not to whine mid sentence.
“good girl. mine” he gave your shoulder a quick peck. “gonna put it in now, okay? tell me if you wanna stop” he took his dick from out of his boxers and pumped it a few times. you could’ve fainted once you felt his tip lined up to your entrance.
he went in slowly, he was way to big for you. every time you thought he was done, there would still be more of him left.
“jaaames” you would whine
“just a bit left; don’t worry, princess” once he was fully inside of you, you felt amazing, like you were in heaven. “you’re so fucking tight, ‘feels so good” he said, trying to to groan, his voice was raspy.
if took a few thrusts for you to get used to his size, but as soon as he picked up a pace, you were a mess. you couldn’t hold in your sounds, the way he was stimulating your clit was absolutely killing you.
“be fucking quiet” he demanded with a groan, “you want everyone to know who you belong to, huh?” he didn’t stop, he just went quicker as a matter of fact.
“fuck!” you squealed as he pinched your clit, his thrusts began to be more rough, you couldn’t even focus. you’re eyes kept rolling back, your mind was fully blank and the only thing that was coming out of your mouth in that moment was a mixture of james, fuck, shit and a few other curse words.
you were in ecstasy.
“you like this, don’t you?” he was grunting lowly in between every few thrusts. you were so close, you felt your high coming to you, the way he was fucking you was not helping with you trying to hold it.
“james ohmygod james, im gonna cum” you say, trying not to stumble over your words.
“ask nicely and i’ll let you” he said, stopping the stimulation on your clit and thrusting harder. he was close too, the way your tight pussy would clench around him was making him go insane.
“please let me cum, james. need it so bad” you blurted out in between whining and moaning. he grins and goes back to stimulating you.
“good girl, do it” he went faster and didn’t stop playing with your clit. your eyes rolled back and you let it go.
your walls clench tight around him, he didn’t stop as you made a mess all over his dick.
as you finished, his thrusts only got harder, you were feeling so overstimulated and you felt like he was close too.
“fuck, sweetheart. gonna cum inside you, that’s alright?” you moaned in answer.
his hips stuttered and you felt his cock twitch spilled inside of you, his juices mixing with yours.
he made sure he got rid of every single drop.
your legs were shaking as he pulled out and tucked himself back into his underwear, you collapsed on the bed and he laid down next to you.
“wanna go back to the party?” he jokes, looking into your eyes.
“shut up” you reply, looking at the ceiling of his room.
“gonna clean you up, okay?” james assured you as he threw you a shirt of his that was under the bed. you put it on but pulled him closer to you.
“okay, but just stay with me for a while if that’s alright.” you asked.
“always” he pressed a kiss onto your forehead and you knew that this was not going to be a one time thing.
#lila writes#james potter x reader#james potter fic#james potter smut#james potter x y/n#james potter x you#james potter oneshot#james potter fanfiction#james potter imagine#marauders x reader#silencesscreams
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𝐒𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫
Charles Leclerc x reader
Word count: 2.8k
Summary: Your Charles supporter in every high and low, always there to celebrate and help him in every way possible
Warnings: Fluff, Smut (almost only smut), a little angst
Notes: First time I publish any work for Charleees and this became just smut basically. I didn't really have any plot, just started with the smut so it became a little weird but anyway. I still struggle writing smut so this is not great but I feel like it's getting better every time at least
"That was really... impressive" you smiled sarcastically, catching his annoyed face getting even more so as his eyes rolled. "Can you just not" he sighed, stopping in front of you and wiping his face off the sweat with the towel he'd received after quali.
"What, I'm just speaking facts"
Charles didn't answer that, he just narrowed his eyes before drinking big sips from his water bottle. "Seriously" you hummed, wanting to push his buttons even though you knew it wasn't the smartest seeing as he was already annoyed.
"It is impressive, crashing two days in a row. Wow, I'm just so excited to see what you will do tomorrow. Maybe crash?"
Charles let out a grunt, staring at you really unimpressed by your attitude as you gave him your famous smirk. That smirk that he hated and loved at the same time because even if it could get on his nerves in situations like these, that smirk was also the thing he loved about you.
"You know just what to say to cheer a man up huh" he spoke monotony, not even looking at you as he whipped up his phone "Oh I do" you tilled, looking at him with a teasing expression but he only shook his head.
"You know, Carlos' girlfriend hugs him or comforts him when he fails" He spoke lowly, almost accusingly as he gathered his stuff.
"Lucky Carlos" you hummed, smiling at your boyfriend who finally let out a chuckle. The frown on his beautiful face melting off and relaxing
You moved to him, erasing the meter of space between you as you wrapped your arms around his neck.
"You know I support you and I will listen to your rant all evening so I gotta have some fun as well. You know I love you and think you are the best driver in the world" you tutted, pecking his lips as he smiled "That sounded so sincere darling" he hummed making you laugh, kissing him again "It was"
Race weekends were a thrill. You loved them and hated them at the same time. Being at the grid was a vibe in itself, something hard to describe but being so close to the action also meant close to the danger. You loved racing but you hated the risks and seeing your boyfriend in the action left you with a never-ending anxiety. But you knew it was his dream so you had no choice but to support him and swallow your worries.
Ferrari was his dream but also his curse. The never-ending struggles and the pressure he put on himself made him overworked and twitchy but you also knew he loved all aspects of racing and he truly believed he could achieve great things with the team. You didn't doubt it but the road there was long and it took effort, not only from Charles and the team but for you too.
The day in honor Charles started at pole but there wasn't much denying that he had had a tough weekend so far, pole in both qualifying but also in the wall two times which of course took a lot of confidence.
The race was boring to say the least, nothing happening and Red bull being far top left little to no excitement in the top two. The real fight was between Charles and Alonso, Charles managing all the way to the podium.
You bubbled with joy as you watched him celebrate on the podium, spraying Champagne and laughing before he came down again. A large smile and Champaign covering his already sweaty face.
"You did it" you grinned, hugging him tightly as he entered the garage again. "I did, not the wall today eh" he grinned smugly, kissing you passionately before you pushed him off not wanting to be too much in the public eye.
-
You celebrated with the rest of the grid in a club that evening, not wanting to let Charles miss out on the fun just because you were there even if the Monegasque had been more tempted to stay in the hotel-room.
Charles was glued to your side the whole evening, kissing your shoulders, grabbing your ass whenever you were out of sight and always finding an excuse to touch you. Not that you were complaining but he was touchier than usual.
"What's with you today Char? Go out and party" Pierre joked, shoving his friend in the shoulder as he sat on a small couch-group with you and a couple of others. "No no, don't feel like it" Charles dismissed. "What's with him?" Pierre asked directed to you but Charles answered anyway, eyes rolling at his friend "It's nothing with me" he chuckled, shaking his head at the Frenchman who didn't let up
"He is just a bit needy" you smiled, grinning at Charles who glared at you whilst Pierre laughed out loud, raising his hands in surrender "Don't let me stand in your way mate" he chuckled, backing away winking at both of you.
"For real?" Charles sighed unimpressed, looking at you with tired eyes as you couldn't contain your laughter. "But it's true, isn't it Char?" you hummed, teasingly tracing your fingertips up over his thigh, smirking at the way his breath hitched when your fingers danced over his bulge.
"Maybe" he murmured, shoving your hand away with a warning glare.
"It's nothing wrong with it baby" you grinned, mocking him with your expression.
"Shush you" he muttered, shoving you away from him whilst you laughed.
It didn't take long for Charles to run out of patience, especially not since you seemed to find a way to tease him in every way possible so when you arrived at the hotel it didn't surprise you when he immediately attacked you with kisses, eyes asking you to help him out.
-
"Aww" you mocked, a pout on your lips as you jerked him off faster "you're so needy baby" you hummed. Every time your hand went to his tip your thumb slid over his tip making him release the most amazing sounds.
He looked so beautiful when he was like this. All needy and vulnerable for you. His eyes were hooded, lips parted and his brow furrowed in concentration. A thin layer of sweat covered his body as he tried to let you do your thing despite his itching muscles and need to touch you.
He was close, you could clearly tell by the way his things tensed and bucked into your hand. "Y/n, baby, please" he gasped out, only making you speed up your movements. When your other hand made its way to gently touch his balls he was gone.
He threw his head back, eyes rolling as he stuttered out moans, quickly coming undone. The thought about stopping crossed your mind but the look on his face, begging you to not, made you finish him off.
Your lips hushed the sounds coming from his lips loud enough to be heard to the rooms around you and you knew he would be teased to death the next day if they heard him.
"Yes Charlie, that's it, come for me" you whispered, his eyes closing as he came over his stomach, body trembling as he breathed hard trying to catch his breath.
He stayed in the same position for a while, trying to stabilize his breath as you observed him. Sometimes you couldn't believe that out of all the people on this earth he chose you to be with, looking at him like this made you feel like he was something extreme. So beautiful you couldn't even describe it, lips parted, eyes hooded and skin shimmering in the late evening-light.
Soon enough he started to move, breaking you out of your little bubble. He got up on his knees, wraling the small way it was to where you were sitting crossed legged just right beside him before he gently pushed you down on the soft mattress. The playful grin he had on his face made you giggle as you fell on your back, inviting him to get on top of you.
"Stop laughing" he pouted, seemingly offended but the smile he couldn't hide betrayed him. "Sorry sorry" you smiled, patting his shoulder reassuringly as he hovered over you.
His smile mirrored yours, his dreamy eyes smiling too. "Wanna take care of you too" he murmured, his breath fanning your ear.'making you shiver. "Do whatever you want" you softly hummed back, gently running your fingers through his soft hair.
The way his eyes fell shut at the sensation and his neck craned into your touch made it clear that you were the one in charge tonight, he wanted you to take charge and he'd happily obey.
You let him be for a second, his lips kissing over your shoulder and neck as his fingers teasingly traced your panties. Fingers dipping into the waistband before disappearing to gently caress the soft skin on your tummy. When you let out a grunt of annoyance he immediately threw a glance at you, smirking as he got the memo.
You couldn't help but to let out a moan as his fingers finally dipped down into your panties. His slick fingers spread your wetness around before gently playing small precise circles on your clit. He loved watching your face whenever he was touching you, relishing in pride that he made you feel that way, that he could make you cum and become fuzzy for him.
His fingers found your entrance, slowly flicking into you making your mouth fall open. Your body wriggle around, trying to get away from his skillful fingers as it felt too good. His thumb connecting to your clit made the dam break as you pushed his hand away. Challenging him with your look as he whined, wanting to make you cum.
He immediately fell quiet when he saw your look, your hand wrapping delicately around his throat as you kissed over his jaw. "What was that huh?" you hummed, feeding on the sound he let past his lips. "Nothing" he hummed quickly, eyes fleeting over you as a wicked smirk crawled over your face. You loved this power-balance you had. Having Charles dominate you was always bound to be thrilling but you also loved being the one in charge. Having him following your demands was a rare type of power, of course built on complete trust. But you also loved how you sometimes didn't need to have any power, you could just be you, together.
Today was your chance to take the reins though, feeling like it had been a while since you did last since Charles had gone through a period of wanting control, which you didn't mind at all but it did feel great to take charge now.
Your fingers tightened slightly around his throat, not hard enough to choke him for real, just to mark your dominance.
"Thought so" you smirked, flipping him around so you were on top. You gave him a cheeky smile as your mouth trailed a path of kisses down his chest and over his navel, kissing over his abs and v-line as he breathed hard. Your mouth graced over his rock-hard dick but you ignored it for the time being, wanting to tease him slightly.
"Y/n please" he pleaded, hips rutting to get close to your mouth but you just chuckled, pressing his hips down on the sheet as you licked over his abs. "What is it baby?" you hummed in a mocking tone, innocent eyes blinking up at him as you licked up his chest before hanging your face close to his.
"What do you want, Charlie?" you hummed again, breathing over his face because you knew it drove him crazy, along with calling him Charlie that you knew turned him on when in this situation. "Want you to touch me, fuck me, please" he hurried out, his hands gripping onto your hips hard.
"Aww are you needy again" you teased, kissing over his cheek as he tried to calm down his shallow breathing. "Please y/n" he whined, trying to position you over his dick with his hands but you only tutted at him "No no" you chuckled, slapping his hands away.
He looked so fragile and vulnerable in the way he laid there, trying to obey your wishes whilst fighting to not break. His eyes were glossy, body twitchy and lips swollen from biting at them. You took pity on him as he wriggled, uncomfortably hard and face contorting.
"Aw baby, look at you" you mocked, wrapping your fingers around his dick softly which made him gasp out a moan, eyes squeezing together.
"Fuck, I hate when you are bratty like this" Charles moaned out, making you chuckle at him, smirking cheekily. "You do?" you teased, jerking him off slightly quicker, relishing in the sharp breath he breathed in before letting his head fall back into the pillows
"I really do, but I love it too" he murmured, biting his lip so hard it would draw blood "Oh I know you do Charlie, the submissive part of you love to be under my mercy. But the dominant part wants to punish me, doesn't it?"
"It really does" he gritted out as your thumb rubbed over his sensitive tip "Oh but I know you love this so much right now Char, just laying here and taking what I give you, letting me control you" your voice was thick, seductive and sweet as sugar as he nodded "I do love it"
You chuckled again, slowly stroking him before stopping completely not wanting him to cum like this.
You kissed his lips sweetly, his lips melting into yours as you lined him up with you, slowly rubbing his dick over your wetness. When you started to sink down on him he broke the kiss, gasping in symphony with you as you sank down all the way, taking him to the hilt.
"Fuck baby" he moaned, blinking quickly as you stroke his cheek, breathing heavily into his neck, your hips moving in circles, letting yourself get used to him.
After a few seconds of kissing and snogging you sat up so you straddled him for real, your hands planted firmly on his strong chest as you started to move more firmly on him.
His hands on your hips simply stayed still, you not letting him control your movements as you quickened your pace before slowing down, rolling your hips to create the best pattern for both of your pleasure.
Both of your moans bounced around in the hotel-room. No longer being able to think long enough to cover either of your mouths as the sounds got stronger and louder the longer you rode him.
"Fuck fuck y/n, I'm close, please" he blabbered, blinking up at you with the most pleasure struck look you'd ever seen on him. "It's okay baby" you hummed, going faster over him, slamming your hips down on his every time he bottomed out inside of you.
"A-are you close?" he asked softly. You nodded, stilling your hips for a moment as you took a grip on his hand, leading it to your pussy and firmly placing his fingers on your clit. Charles didn't need more instructions than that as you started moving again, rubbing firm precise circles over your clit in the way he knew drove you crazy, and tonight was no different.
It got harder to move smoothly as you felt your orgasm approaching quickly, your head dropping as your moans became louder. Your eyes found his, asking him to help you and he understood, meeting your thrusts with his own making him feel even bigger and reach even deeper inside of you. You angled your hip, trying to hit the perfect spot and when you did find it, it didn't take long for your eyes to roll as your orgasm flooded over you, taking Charles with you as he moaned out loud, not caring anymore.
It took a few minutes for you both to calm down and regain your normal breath. You lead him to the shower, taking turns in gently washing each-other to get rid of the sticky feeling of sex.
You wrapped yourself in his arms, peppering his face with kisses as he chuckled, wrapping you tightly to his chest. "Love you amor" he whispered, his characteristic smile playing on his lips. "Love you to Char" you hummed, stroking beads of hair out of his tired face "Love you even if you drive in to the wall" you smiled, catching his eyes roll before chuckling in defeat "as long as you don't hurt yourself of course" you added, kissing his nose sweetly.
#f1#f1 imagines#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#f1 fanfiction#ferrari#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc imagines#charles leclerc fanfiction#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc angst#charles leclerc smut#charles leclerc oneshot#f1 oneshot#scuderia ferrari
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Dating The BroZone Brothers 🎤🎶
Tags: Gender-neutral reader, Fluff, Some Angst (mostly for Branch lol), Also Broppy isn't canon here, obviously. But I love them dearly so don't come at me!
Follow me @taruchinator for more structured content and/or feel free to leave a request here in asks. Enjoy!
John Dory
We all know this man is a bit self-centered, and that doesn't stop at your relationship.
He'll find any opportunity to show off for you— anything from singing, to dancing, to just his ‘incredible leadership skills that make him the perfect boyfriend!’
He also definitely introduced himself as a member of the old boy band BroZone, which you may or may not have heard of, which may or may not have left him flabbergasted.
Despite all his faults though, John Dory will do his best to be a good partner for you. It's what you deserve, after all!
Keeping you safe from wild creatures, making sure you're always happy because he loves your smile, and also being the overprotective boyfriend who'll square off against anyone who even dares to make you uncomfortable even if they're 10x his size.
Small detail, but he also loves the fact that Rhonda took a liking to you instantly.
“She knows how to pick the good ones,” he'd say with a wink.
Talks about his brothers CONSTANTLY, but always in a way that makes it seem like he doesn't care and that it's their fault the band broke up in the first place. He obviously really cares about them, though.
Some nights, he'll reflect and regret all the stuff he said and did to them, and wishes he could go back and make it right. You reassure him through most of it, trying to convince him that he was young and just didn't know any better.
He stares at you in awe and disbelief because how could ANYONE think that what he did was justifiable? Abandoning his younger siblings all because of his stupid ego and personal insecurities.
“I really don't deserve you...”
Give him some time he's just emotionally constipated.
Also you BET he's gonna show you off to his brothers once they're reunited, so just let him. He just wants the most important people in his life to meet.
You can also expect them to try and embarrass John Dory with stories from their childhood, so be ready to have a good laugh as your boyfriend plots for murder in the background.
Spruce/Bruce
Probably the one who's best equipped to be in a relationship out of everyone in the group.
He is a family man, after all.
Speaking of which, if you think him settling down in the movie and having kids of his own was cute, it really is! But that just indicates that he has a way with children.
If you have a child or younger sibling, expect them to get dotted and taken care of to DEATH by this man.
He may not have been the sensitive one of the group, but was definitely the most reliable of the eldest, so he's got experience handling little trouble makers that come his way.
He still opens a cantina in Vacay Island, which is where you two met for the first time, and so you help run it occasionally whenever you have the chance. And even though you don't go there 24/7, all the regulars just think that you're the co-owner since you're dating Bruce.
You're the one who finds out that he's actually ‘Spruce’, the member of old boy band BroZone. You just happened to stumble upon an old record he kept in his room, and after confronting him about it, he reluctantly confirms your suspicions.
It was hard to recognize him since he was much older now and his body had definitely... grown over the years.
Bruce doesn't like preaching about those days, since he's quite embarrassed of the ‘immature ladies man’ he used to be back then.
But he won't deprive you of them either, since he'll happily share any stories on his misadventures with his brothers, funny backstage incidents, etc.
He misses them dearly and wishes they're all doing okay.
Two words: Hopeless. Romantic.
He's ‘The Heart Throb’ for a reason.
Roses, chocolates, dances— he can do it all!
Bruce will always make time in his busy schedule to spend time with you, taking you on dates to your favorite spots around the island, getting you meaningful gifts, and just overall expressing his love for you in any way he can.
He loves singing to you because it always serenades you and it puts a smile on his face.
People always joke that he's going to propose to you out of the blue one of these days, which always leaves him a flustered mess, but he never denies either.
“What can I say? I might be waiting for the perfect opportunity...”
Clay
Poor baby doesn't know what he's doing but he's trying, okay?
The two of you meet in the abandoned Bergen Golf Course, where you and Viva welcome him with open arms, and everything pretty much plays as in the movie, except that he really likes spending time with you and ONLY you, which he doesn't quite understand?
You're the one to ask him out cause otherwise you'd be playing this back and forth forever. He says yes.
He's never had a partner before, so he's justifiably worried that he'll mess up in some way, or that you'll end up finding him too boring after a while.
This becomes much more apparent after a particular bad night, in which after mumbling incoherently because of a nightmare, you find out that he has brothers and used to be in a boy band.
He doesn't open up about it at first, so you give him some space and reassure him that you'll be there when he needs you. Just give him some time and he'll tell you eventually.
He talks about how he could never be himself, since he was always expected to be ‘The Fun One’, and now he's basically tried to become the complete opposite in hopes of gaining some control over his life.
But he also worries that others will think he's too dull, and that he just isn't interesting enough to be around. Especially you.
You immediately take his face in your hands and look him in the eyes.
“I fell in love with Clay. Not ‘The Fun Troll from BroZone’ Clay. Also, you're fun in your own way!”
He basically falls for you all over again after hearing this.
After that, he becomes slightly less uptight and allows himself to enjoy the little things. You sometimes actually catch him dancing when he thinks no one's looking and you find it's the most adorable thing in the world, even after he realizes he's not alone and wants the earth to swallow him whole.
“Don't mind me, I'mma just crawl in a hole for a while...”
“No, no- Babe, it was amazing! I loved it! Pleaseeee show me more!”
Overall, he's a pretty good boyfriend all things considered.
He's incredibly overprotective of you, and will always give you advice and tools he thinks will be helpful if you're thinking of venturing outside of the Golf Course.
He asks Viva for dating advice CONSTANTLY and she DOES NOT let him live it down. Of course she has good ideas, though.
He'll pretty much do anything for you, even if it means going out of his comfort zone.
Floyd
Another great candidate for being in a good relationship.
Need I explain myself with this man?
His entire personality revolves around being caring and understanding, so he's definitely always on the lookout for anything that makes you sad or uncomfortable and will fix it ASAP.
Floyd is the kind of person who will ask for consent with pretty much anything you do— from holding your hand, to kissing you, to giving you a hug; he will ALWAYS make sure that you're okay with it even if you've given him the green light in the past.
He's not huge on PDA due to his somewhat shy nature, but if you are, he'll try his best to keep up with you.
This doesn't mean he dislikes physical affection, in fact it's his love language. He'll go out of his way to try and sneak in as many hugs as possible throughout the day and maybe a kiss or two if you'll allow it, which of course you do.
You also try your best to get involved in his own interests, because that's only fair after everything he does for you.
It isn't until one day that he sings for you that you compliment him and he nonchalantly comments that he used to be in a band when he was a teenager.
Cue the reveal of him having four brothers and you begging him to tell you all about them.
Which he does, but you can't help but notice the melancholic expression on his face, so you immediately stop him and apologize for being pushy on the matter and that he doesn't have to share anything he doesn't want to talk about.
He only looks at you with a small smile and shakes his head.
“No, I'm glad you asked. I haven't talked about them in years, so I like remembering the good times, even if they're in the past now.”
So he'll go on and on about them, one by one, and go into excruciating detail about what kind of person they are and what he loves about them. He's especially fond of his little brother Branch, based on everything he tells you.
When he gets kidnapped by Velvet and Veneer, you immediately go to Branch for help.
Once you're reunited, you two basically run to each other and hug with tears streaming down your eyes.
“Did they hurt you?!”
“No, I'm okay! Did they hurt you?!”
“Who cares?”
“I do!”
Floyd is then incredibly happy to introduce you to his brothers, who begin to affectionately tease him about getting himself a partner and you happily step in to protect him from any unwanted bullying.
You also tell him that you like the new hairdo, which only causes him to giggle and kiss your forehead affectionately.
Honestly you guys probably have the healthiest relationship out of the whole group.
Branch
I was really debating whether to include him or not since there's many Branch Reader Inserts out there, but I don't wanna leave my baby out so here we are!
You have a classic childhood friends to lovers situation with him, since you've known him ever since he was a member of BroZone, only being about a year older than him.
You'd help him practice for his concerts and would always give him pep talks whenever he felt worried that he'd ruin the show.
You're basically his number one fan— never missing a concert even if it meant dragging your parents with you so they'd let you get in.
The moment the group disbands and Branch is left all alone, you're there for him and wait alongside him for his brothers to return, reassuring him that ‘siblings would never break a promise’.
Cue his whole childhood trauma and him losing his colors, but it's only because of you that he doesn't completely isolate himself from society. He still builds his bunker though, since he's pretty much scarred for life thanks to the Bergens.
Just like with Clay, you're the one who takes initiative and asks him out, and he's just left gaping like a fish because why would you want someone like HIM?
After reuniting with John Dory, he's also dotting you about how big you've gotten and treats you like a baby, which actually irks Branch much more than it does to him.
He makes sure to remind his brothers that you both are grown adults, thank you very much.
Once the band gets back together, you kinda become a manager of some kind and help them in organizing their performances. Branch is eternally grateful and thanks you for staying by his side all these years.
#dreamworks trolls#trolls 3#trolls band together#trolls branch#trolls john dory#trolls clay#trolls spruce#trolls floyd#trolls x reader#trolls reader inserts#branch x reader#john dory x reader#clay x reader#spruce x reader#floyd x reader#fanfic
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Some rambly thoughts on the player choices thing.
[Context.]
It is really not difficult to account for player choice, actually. If variable=true, use this bit of text. If variable=false, use this other text. It's that easy!
I get that Bioware has a LOT of different choices to account for, and there is a level of difficulty inherent in that. But, to be blunt, that is the entire job of ludic storytelling. You're making an RPG; that's what you're here to do. If accounting for player choice is becoming an inconvenience rather than an opportunity then that, to me, suggests that you are not making great use of the medium.
Epler's discussion of the location shift is also one I have capital-t Thoughts about. And it actually took me right back to when Inquisition came out! Remember the Dalish elf boon in DA:O? The land granted to the Dalish in the Hinterlands? I did, and I was so disappointed to see no sign of it in Inquisition.
The stuff Epler is saying here is straightforwardly correct: moving to a new location between games is a fantastic idea when it comes to player choice. To this day, I wish Inquisition had been set entirely in Orlais rather than returning us to Ferelden. Moving to a new location lets you show the consequences of player action without getting bogged down in the thorny implications. DA2 did this beautifully - you can bump into the last members of House Harrowmont, on the run from Bhelen's people! You can find that one shipment of blood to the Wardens, if you let Avernus keep doing his thing!
But the crucial thing here is that the stuff I just described still acknowledges player choice. Because you're not in Ferelden at the minute, you can throw that stuff in there without it derailing the plot. You don't have to answer a billion questions about it, you can just let the player speculate. But it gives you that excitement of knowing you made a difference to the world, and that the world continues to turn even when you aren't looking at it.
In some ways this is a corner that the franchise started painting itself into with DA:I. When you shift from 'a series of relatively self-contained stories set in the same world' to 'an ongoing meta-plot', you have to make adjustments for that. And teething problems are inevitable.
I think I've shown my bias here: I kinda think that making that shift at all was a bad idea, tbth. I don't really want or need to know what's up with every weird thing that happens in Thedas - I much prefer it as a big world full of strange corners. I like the idea that not all of the consequences of my actions will be immediately apparent, that things will keep ticking away without me, that I can brace for an explosion that might never happen.
But if you are making that shift then you need to commit to it, dammit. And this doesn't feel like the way.
#da#da4#da:tv#speak faust#lightly da:i critical#da4 critical#da:tv critical#(with apologies for forgetting to add those tags)
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