#I feel like a traitor to the gays
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mrlechattm-iii · 1 year ago
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Fionna and Cake making me care abt a straight relationship is wild like do you know how far you have to reach into my soul to pull out a shred of care for straight couples?
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evelynpr · 2 months ago
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Might be a hot take as a bkdk and tgck truther here, but I find izuocha endlessly fascinating, beautiful, but also tearfully tragic.
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I see their love for each other as something representative of their innocence and naivety when they only knew so little about who they were, and what was to come.
I think the main barrier of their relationship is that its rooted in how they see each other very idealistically, specifically that they're attached to the image of their Best Heroic Selves, and not the deeply selfish, destructive, freaky, and egotistical parts of them. To each other, they need to keep fulfilling that image or else that same person they looked up to would almost die in front of them, and that would be too cruel. Although that hero is still there, that same person they looked up to is not the same now because of...well...everything.
Izuku had barely even talked to girls when he first met her. She was Izuku's first ever real friend (Sorry Kats, everyone and him knows he was terrible), so he saved her in that entrance exam even if it was so dangerous. She gave a new meaning to his derogatory nickname just by being a friend that believed in him. After that, she saved him several more times (Blackwhip and Megaphone are the biggest samples iirc). It makes perfect sense that she is Deku's hero.
Ochako hardly knew what it meant to be a hero when she first got into UA. Just by reaching out to some kid tripping, she made a new friend who would then save her in that exam, then save him again in return. This boy then became someone who was always working so hard to save everyone in trouble, and she realized she wanted to be just like him too. "I want to save people"
But...Deku changes. The weight of One for All is on his shoulders and he needs someone to carry this burden with him. He continues to want to save other people at the expense of himself, still not letting his true selfishness and ego ever show- and it only grows more and more unbearable.
Then...Ochako fell in love with Himiko. Truly, relentlessly, selfishly and devotedly in love with a girl who then dies giving her blood to her- the greatest expression of love Himiko could ever give.
Not that they can't love each other because of this happening (and...so many other things oh god), I'm honestly not sure how to explain it- But them ending up together after losing that innocence and naivety? After Ochako will forever grieve the girl who showed her love in its most beautiful and ugly form? After Izuku changed so fundamentally as a person that the butterflies of a nice girl talking to you doesn't exist anymore? After that simple image of being a hero and being in love has completely changed for them both?
Even so, I believe they still love each other. There is no label I know of that can properly describe them though. They are each other's image of being a hero when it comes to saving people. Aside from Shoto, no one else can grasp the grief of the person you tried to save dying in your hands. They would no doubt try to cope with these losses together, and just try to get better together...but so much has changed. They've changed. The world changed. What are they now? Who are they now?
"What happened...to us?"
#I just think the tragedy of falling out of love for the person who represents who they Used to be is so...so painful#Kacchan isn't even here yet and it's already so complicated.#also. Izch healing together after all this would also be really nice#if u like them ending up together thats also perfectly fine too. im just a bkdk and tgck truther myself. thats kinda my whole thing#but izch forming a deep bond from their experiences and saving eachother#and maybe later on trying to date too...oh boy#and them being able to just...be more casual again. talk abt their lives and dreams together too just so they know they have each other#oh itd be so healing and beautiful#im so glad izuku talked to ochako on that cliff man oh man...#izuocha the underrated tragic love that they could've been if ppl werent so close minded abt them#only the real izch fans understand just how much these two actually mean to each other. god bless yall I swear even if I dont ship ship it#thank u to that person who wrote abt them being characters than run in parallel#that narrative structure for them is permanently in my brain. I love these two so much its no joke#my Extra hot take is that izch wouldve been treated better by the fandom if it was gay.#but we'd still agree on bkdk as the endgame after all that happened. maybe. idk this is a hypothetical.#if you switch ock and kats genders...this wouldve been a very different story and fandom. insane food for thought with this one.#ok thats my yap for the night oh god i have so many feelings about them...#evelynpr bnha#bnha#mha#my hero academia#izuocha#actually confidently putting this tag now. sorry for the angst you guys...and maybe being seen as a traitor#im a strong girl I could take on potential haters hahaha...#izuku midoriya#ochako uraraka
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asurrogateblog · 6 months ago
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as a media psychology researcher 85% of my job is figuring out the most horrifically academic way to say "you idiots wouldn't last a day on tumblr"
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fearsomeandwretched · 1 year ago
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It's reallyyyyy hard to figure out your sexuality when everything is so influenced by trauma. I've flip flopped on my label a lot which also has caused me a lot of anxiety. I finally feel like good saying yes I am bi but it took me a while to get there
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lary-the-lizard · 10 months ago
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I know this is coming from a very biased and snobbish place but watching shows or movies where the queer people are the side characters or their arch is meeting other queer people/falling in love and getting married feels like choosing to watch cishet white guy fucking a woman’s throat and I mean that in the most disgusted and judgmental way possible
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genderqueerdykes · 5 months ago
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thank you both for this, i was literally in the process of writing a post about this as i saw these.
i came out as bisexual when i was about 19 or 20 years old, in 2011 - 2012. this was such a difficult thing because everyone around me suddenly had very pointed opinions on me. suddenly i wasn't queer anymore, i was a straight person. i asked people why and they said well bisexual people are half straight, which makes you straight, which means gay people don't want to be around you. i was told nobody likes bisexuals because they're too straight to be gay and too gay to be straight
i had a literal personal dilemma because i didn't feel like that at all. when i was realizing i was bisexual i was realizing i was attracted to all genders in a queer way. i did NOT feel like my attraction to men, women or genderqueer people was straight in any way, shape or form. i've always fit in much better in both gay and lesbian circles. those have always been my home, and my community
in the early days of my transition, when "genderqueer" wasn't even remotely heard of, i had to try to transition into being a man to be seen as trans at all. i went from being forced into lesbian spaces to being forced into gay male spaces. nobody let me pick where i was existing. i was being pushed around. i liked both lesbian and gay male spaces, but i was being told when i could and couldn't occupy the spaces. and then when it came out i was bi everyone called me a traitor and said i was a straight person
my best friend at the time came with me to pride meetings and when her mom found out about that, and that i was bi, she told my friend she couldn't come to those pride meetings anymore, and that i was turning her daughter into a lesbian. her mother would not stop calling me a lesbian all throughout my life. from early childhood, she thought me and her daughter were dating because i was butch and she was femme and we were very close. her mom carried this belief into adulthood, asking her outright if we were lovers. her brother thought we were, too, and taunted us about it.
my own mom weaponized lesbianism against me. she hated how butch i was. she hated that i "looked and acted like a lesbian". she called me a butch and a bulldyke hatefully. she told me not to dress or look certain ways or else people would assume i, and her by some proxy, were lesbians. my mom was insanely butch so i don't really know why this was being leveraged against me but either way when i became a young adult and my mom was trying to force me to learn to drive (something i am terrified of doing due to having 2 dissociative disorders), she asked what kind of car i would ideally like. i said a truck. i was standing there in a purple plaid shirt and she just sighed and went "I knew you were a lesbian." she pointed out my shirt. she was weaponizing lesbophobic and butchphobic stereotypes against me, but either way, reinforcing that i was a lesbian in one capacity or another
i got so tired of my friends harassing me for saying that if i was bi that meant i was straight and i needed to stop calling myself gay because i wasn't, and that it was an "insult" to the gay community. note that nobody gave a singular flying fuck about the bisexual community at all. i was literally bullied out of identifying as bi, because my straight cishet male friends hated it, and my lesbian identifying GF was uncomfortable with it because it made me sound too straight.
the thing is, none of these people asked what being bisexual meant to me.
i actually liked the lesbian community a lot. i really love other lesbians. i have always been attracted to lesbian and butch identifying people for as long as i could remember. i loved seeing strong butch women on TV, even if there were rude jokes. i loved the idea of being a masculine person who is sometimes a queer masculine woman. i loved the idea of being with femmes, i loved queer women and people who took femininity to the next level. i also loved seeing gay men when and wherever they existed. i always felt like i fit right in, and like i was seeing a reflection of a part of myself i needed help discovering.
i have almost always, as long as i can remember, identified as a gay man, and a lesbian, at the same time. my attraction to men, women, and people of all genders is queer no matter what gender of mine is involved. it doesn't matter. i have never felt "half gay half straight" which is why people weaponizing heterosexuality against me as a bisexual forced me to strictly identify as a gay man for almost a decade. it was painful to ignore my butch lesbian side, and to stop identifying as gay, because people would criticize how attractive i found women, and other people
if people had let me exist and explain what bisexuality means to me, they could've understood that bisexual is an inherently deeply queer attraction no matter what genders are involved, but NOBODY cares to listen to the bisexual. everyone LOVES to speak for us because we're just "straight people invading the queer community."
we've had it. bisexuals are queer. even if they DO identify as "half straight" they're STILL queer. let bisexuals define bisexuality. there is no one size fits all form of bisexuality. every single bisexual defines it differently and that's the point. it's a very complex identity with many layers that often relate to gender and presentation as well as attraction.
let bisexuals define bisexuality.
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reallyromealone · 7 months ago
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This doesn't have to be a request if you don't want to write it. But can you imagine what it would be like to be the boyfriend in a poly relationship with Zoro and Sanji? Like Zoro focuses more on his swords, drinking, and napping. But Sanji focuses on women, cooking, and smoking. I'd feel so bad because while you love them both, you just don't feel like they actually love you as much.
Sorry for that. I just saw a angsty headcannon on pinterest and my heart just broke. Also how is Lily???? We miss seeing her so much
Title: endings
Fandom: one piece
Characters: strawhat crew
Fic type: angst
Pairings: Zoro x reader x Sanji
Warnings: male reader, reader insert, angst, gay
Notes:
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
(Name) Loved his boyfriends.
He really did.
But... He often felt that they didn't love him as much.
Zoro was always out drinking or napping or showing more love to swords than his partners... Always blowing off (name)s ideas for dates or dinners or anything that he didn't want to do even slightly.
Want to go for a walk? Nah, rather nap.
Want to go to dinner at a nice restaurant? Nah rather get drunk with friends.
And then there was Sanji.
Flirting with women, cooking to the point of obsession and even snapping at (name) for entering his kitchen and a nicotine addiction that made him worry.
He had shitty boyfriends.
He was aware.
And so was everyone, seeing as Nami let Sanji flirt with her and buy her things.
What a traitor or was she ever on his side?
He was an outsider in his own relationship, unsure what to do.
But he believed he had an answer to it all and he hated it.
(Name) Walked to deck where he saw his boyfriends drinking and partying with the others, staring at Sanji chatting up the girls and Zoro absolutely tanked, eyes growing empty and distant at the sight.
It was usopp who noticed (name) first and went up to him "you alright?" He asked the other who slowly stared at the black haired man "I'm fine... I just realized I have something to do"
(Name) Took a quill and some parchment and wrote up his breakup letter before placing it on Sanji's bed, knowing he was more likely to read it before grabbing his bag and belongings.
A quick conversation with Luffy and a mournful goodbye from him and (name) left the ship, the captain understanding why he needed time to himself and to think things over, giving him a compass as a parting gift.
(Name) Didn't know how they would react or if they cared but he knew this was what he needed to do.
And hopefully he would come out happier.
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wannabanauthor · 29 days ago
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What if Tommy and Eddie discussed the breakup, and it goes from serious to funny?
So Eddie goes to Tommy's house and is like "I'm here to check on you, let's get a beer."
Tommy tries to refuse, but Eddie says, "You broke my best friend's heart, so the least you could do is explain your reasoning to me."
Tommy reluctantly goes. After a few beers, he starts rambling.
"I fucked up, and I don't know how to fix it or even if I should fix it. I was falling in love with him, and it snuck up on me. I didn't expect for it to get more serious," Tommy says. "I thought it was just going to be fun for awhile, and we'd go our separate ways."
"Your second date with him was to his sister's wedding," Eddie points out.
"Oh so sue me! It's not my fault I caved. He gave me these pleading puppy eyes, and I found myself agreeing."
Eddie rolls his eyes. "Well, if you never expected it to get serious and didn't want it to get serious, then why haven't you found your rebound yet? It's been weeks. Even Chimney and Maddie are telling Buck to start dating again."
Tommy groans into his hands and then rubs his temples. "Fucking traitors."
"Well, I know this hot priest-"
"Been there, done that," Tommy says and takes a swig of his beer.
Eddie looks at him with a bewildered look on his face. "What?"
"What?" Tommy responds with a shrug. "I was raised Catholic. Guilt about sexuality is easy to spot, but he made the first move."
"Do I even want to know how?"
"Ever had sex in a confession booth?"
Eddie's eyes are wide and horrified. "Please don't tell me-"
"It was an old booth in storage, but it was still pretty hot. Once I admitted to myself that I was gay, I had a lot of catching up to do."
Then Tommy goes quiet and gets sad again. "I'll never meet another Evan in my life. I think he's ruined me for other men."
"Don't say that. While, I prefer you two together, you can always find someone else."
Tommy snorts in disbelief. "Yeah, not gonna happen. At least when it comes to sex. His adorable face and cheery smile haunt my dreams, and his proficiency with dick makes it impossible for me to get it up even when watching porn."
"Oh no, I need more alcohol for this," Eddie says and orders some shots.
He and Tommy go through a couple of them.
Tommy's tongue gets looser. "His dick is fantastic. Perfect length, thickness, and stamina. I know my body pretty well, and let me tell you, the prostate orgasms from him were out of this world. I barely lasted five minutes before coming just from him fucking me."
Eddie is drunk enough that he's not even fazed.
"Not to mention he has this slight curve that makes him hit the spot every time, and goddamn, I miss that dick and the dork attached to it," Tommy continues. "He made me feel comfortable and safe and cherished. Being around him was effortless, mostly, and I miss him so much."
Tommy starts sniffling, and then tears roll down his cheeks. "Fuck, I don't want to cry."
Eddie puts a comforting hand on Tommy's shoulder. "Call him. He's a mess and miserable without you. He's been baking so much that the entire station's hemoglobin A1C levels are pre-diabetic. We had to force him to focus on savory cooking."
Tommy shakes his head. "He doesn't want to hear from me. I broke his heart. I'm the last person that should be contacting him."
"He does want to hear from you. He's only been baking and cooking so much to stop himself from contacting you because he wants to give you space and respect your boundaries post-breakup."
"What would I even say? That I panicked and ran? I told him he would break my heart if we moved in together. There's no coming back from that."
Eddie sighs and sets his drink down. "Listen, the first time you ended things with Buck, I told him he was an idiot but to call you anyway. Now it's your turn to be the idiot. Go get your man back. Call him. Talk to him. He'd settle for a text. Just do something! You both are suffering without each other. You don't have to move in with him. He just wants you back in his life."
More tears run down Tommy's face and it turns into full sobs. Eddie scoots closer to him and gives him a hug. Tommy clings to him, sobbing even harder.
After drinks, they stop by a taco place and sober up while eating delicious birria tacos. They go back to Tommy's place, and Eddie sleeps on the couch just to make sure Tommy is alright. Before he falls asleep, he texts Buck.
"If Tommy contacts you, go easy on him. He's an idiot too."
When Tommy wakes up the next morning, he nearly stops breathing when he sees that Evan texted him.
"I miss you." was all it said.
Tommy cradles his phone in his hands for several minutes before pressing the call button. He holds his breath until Evan answers.
"I miss you too," Tommy says.
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floatingcatacombs · 1 month ago
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The Normal Author’s Girlfriend’s List Of Bad Yuri Anime
12 Days of Aniblogging 2024, Day 11
So you’ve seen some good yuri anime: Revolutionary Girl Utena (and the movie, if you want), Bloom Into You, Puella Magi Madoka Magica (plus, of course, Rebellion, which is essential), Bocchi: The Rock!, Girls Last Tour. You know HaruMichi and Farcille and poor sweet Tomoyo Daidouji and Quanxi’s whole deal. You’ve been queerbaited by Kyoani, or maybe you got lucky and watched Dragon Maid which was actually gay; you no longer get weirded out by incest; you wanted more Utena and got The Witch from Mercury S1 (good) or Revue Starlight (bad); maybe you’ve even gone back to Oniisama e and discovered Ryoko Ikeda’s incredible butch-for-butch technologies.
You’ve seen some good yuri and that’s been great. It’s just… there isn’t that much of it. Well, you could start reading manga, or books, or talking to actual women, but you want more yuri anime specifically.
To you, dear reader, I offer up this solution:
Bad Yuri.
Floating Catacombs 2025 Presents:
A Normal Author’s Girlfriend Production
The Normal Author’s Girlfriend’s List Of Bad Yuri Anime
Before we get started, let’s define our terms. First: Bad Yuri must not be in good taste. Second, let us consider some ‘ungood’ yuri, that we might understand what we aren’t looking for:
Case 1: Liz and the Blue Bird.
Boring and forgettable. Bad Yuri must be watchable.
Case 2: Shoujo Kageki Revue Starlight.
Yeah the butchfemme was good but I spent this entire show waiting for KuroMaya and they only got half an episode. I don’t fucking care about ‘childhood friends’. Bad Yuri must be enjoyable.
Case 3: Hibike Euphonium
It has to be gay. Come on. This is like the most basic requirement.
Case 4: MagiRevo, Undead Murder Farce
Being gay is not enough. You have to have actual characters.
In sum: Bad Yuri must be in bad taste; it must be watchable on a minute-to-minute basis; it must not leave the watcher with a bad taste in her mouth; it must actually be gay; and it must have some semblance of characterization. In practice it is basically always violent and horny. We’re talking like Kill La Kill levels, although if you ever want to watch that you should just go see Promare instead. Also, I reserve the right to break any and all of these rules whenever I feel like it. Without further ado:
Cross Ange
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Content Warnings: Blood, Violence, Death, Sexual Assault, Ryona, Incest, Bad Taste, Needlessly Edgy, It’s Just Porn At This Point, Incredibly Stupid Plot Twists, Pretty Much Every Fetish
Princess Ange’s traitorous older brother exiles her to an island full of lesbians, where she must pilot a mech to fight dragons in incredibly revealing clothing.
This is Code Geass if it was about a girl and also worse (sorry Roze of the Recapture). This show starts with a baby being arrested. They put the baby in a special little baby jail cage in the back of a police car. The first episode ends with lesbian rape under the justification of a strip search. The weak girls on Pussy Fight Island pull knives on each other at the slightest provocation; the stronger girls pull guns; the strongest girls just use their hands.
It’s got all the subtlety of villainess manga. It’s got girls pissing themselves. It’s got a girl named Riza, short for Lizardia, because she is secretly a DRAGON. Forget ‘Lesbian soldier hopelessly in love with her commander’ – it’s got that too but it has I kid you not a lesbian harem where the top dies in combat so one of the four harem girlies has to turn into a top like a clownfish undergoing sequential hermaphroditism and take over. And then she dies too and the next one in line has to take over and then it happens again and then when it’s down to two one of them leaves because she can tell the current top’s heart isn’t in it and defects to Akio Ohtori’s side, because at least he’s willing to fuck her (lesbian cuckold count: 1) And everybody’s ass is out at all times.
It’s also got a surprising amount of Gundam intertextuality? The comparisons to Iron-Blooded Orphans are obvious; Kira Yamato is there, for some reason; her mecha is the Zeta Gundam but if it was the Strike Freedom with the TR-6 Woundwort’s Psyco Blade Goddess Antenna from Mobile Suit Gundam: Advance of Zeta: The Flag of Titans; the girls in Ange’s squadron each map perfectly to Shaddiq Zenelli’s Grassley girls.
But that’s not what you’re here for. You’re here for the scene where Hilda confesses that she’s in love with Ange but understands that Ange can never love her back, because Ange is already in love with Kira Yamato, and also with Salamandinay, a DRAGON princess from the True Earth who arrived through a dimensional rift to free Aura, the first DRAGON and the source of all magic, before Ange grabs her and gives her a full kiss while telling her that the world she’s fighting to create will have all kinds of relationships.
God Jill is so hot.
Shlock: Maximum
Lesbian: Yes, somehow, and bisexual as well. It is a male gaze thing but that’s going to be a constant with this microgenre. The vast majority of people who like women are men statistically and sometimes thank god they produce something like this
Watchability: High, if you have covid
Quality: Awful.
The Executioner And Her Way Of Life
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Content Warnings: Death, Ryona, Incest, Bad Taste, Needlessly Edgy, Incredibly Stupid Plot Twist
Menou is a priestess in Isekai World whose job is to hunt down and kill Isekai Boys before they start causing problems with their Isekai Boy Powers. But this latest Isekai Boy Target… is a Girl With Enormous Tatas who she can’t kill because she auto-rewinds time to erase any wounds.
What really does it here for me is Menou’s relationship with her mentor, Flare, who groomed trained her from a young age to cut off all her emotions in order to make her a better executioner. I’m not immune to Empty Spaces/Combat Dolls/Signalis. What if Christianity wasn’t about raising girls as lambs to the slaughter but was instead about raising girls to use knives to kill people? A seductive premise for those with my particular flavor of religious trauma. Akari is fine, although I feel like Smith (Bravern) did Homura better.
I also like Momo, although I have a weakness for lesbian cuckolds (more on that later, possibly).
Shlock: High
Lesbian: Lesbian
Watchability: Moderate
Quality: Mid
Kakegurui
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Content Warnings: Bad Taste, Needlessly Edgy, Boy Protagonist before the story thankfully gets bored of him, It’s Just Porn At This Point
Yumeko Jabami transfers into Gambling Academy, where everybody gambles and failing to pay your debts means being forced into petplay slavery. Luckily for her and unluckily for everyone else she is the world’s most perfect gambler because it turns her on.
Maybe the highest exposure show on this list? It’s got gambling, and sexual gambling, and a girl who can only orgasm if she’s actively taking place in a gamble where she could die. At one point she whacks off in a bathroom playing solo Russian Roulette. It’s got a Netflix original season 2 villain who was a girl forced to dress as a boy for years in ways that drove her sexually insane. It’s got The Tower of Doors, which is the most woman game that any woman has ever played.
My favorite bit character is probably the early villain who collects fingernails from everybody she beats because that’s her fetish, or the hopelessly-devoted Student Council Secretary who wants only to lay her face on the chair where her beloved Student Council President sits (lesbian cuckold count 3; 4 if you count Midori). She asks to gamble with her life and Yumeko says that that’s boring, and that there are things she values more – and that they’ll gamble with one life vs her relationship to the Student Council President instead.
Watch the opening for this one – it’s very clear about what it is, and if it doesn’t hook you it isn’t the show for you.
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Shlock: Very High
Lesbian: Surprisingly
Watchability: Very high
Quality: Fine
Akuma No Riddle
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Content Warnings: Violence, Sexual Assault, Death, Ryona, Bad Taste, Needlessly Edgy, Fanservice, Various Fetishes
Bishonen girl assassin Tokaku Azuma has received her first assignment: attend the Black Class at Killing People Murder High School and kill sweet and innocent-seeming Haru Ichinose, who she immediately falls in love with. Unfortunately the other eleven members of the Black Class are also there to kill Haru.
And they’re all lesbian or bisexual. And they’re all freaks.
They’re constantly pulling guns and knives on each other. Like every conversation a weapon will come out – possibly two. There’s a lesbian serial killer who really likes using scissors on girls. Sexually. The Student Council President is sexually devoted to the school principal. There’s a twenty-year-old spoiled rich girl with a boy’s name because she was named after her mom, who was a gay man. Her dad was also a gay man. If you dare say anything homophobic about this she will kill you. Two of these girls locked eyes right as they transferred in and immediately dropped everything to engage in a 24/7 ageplay dynamic. The other spoiled rich girl is secretly a cyborg and in love with the multiple personality girl, who wants to kill her as well.
This is by the author of infamous shotacon BL manga Loveless, so I guess all that is to be expected.
Also… Akiko Morishima got really into making doujinshi for this one? Sure.
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Shlock: High
Lesbian: Yeah
Watchability: Pretty decent
Quality: Sure
Yuri Kuma Arashi
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Content Warnings: Sexual Assault, Bad Taste, It’s Basically Just Porn At This Point, Bears
Lesbian Bear Storm.
For my money, the best Ikuhara post-Utena work is Sarazanmai, but Yurikuma Arashi absolutely earns its spot on this list. The pieces of a story about how lesbian desire is used to titillate a male audience but never fulfilled, how desire is regulated and rendered hideous, and how girls enforce heteropatriarchy by manufacturing consensus completely independent of men are in there somewhere under the moaning naked girls licking honey off precisely-positioned lilies. I think? It’s well-directed, at least.
Shlock: Ikuni
Lesbian: Ikunirappa
Watchability: Ikunichauda
Quality: Ikunigomamonaka
(the first half of) Birdie Wing: Girls Golf Story
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Content Warnings: Violence, Bad Taste, Incest but not really, Golf, The Threat of Having To Resort To Survival Sex Work Underlying This Stupid Golf Show
Birdie Wing is the story of a girl who hates golf and a girl who loves golf. Season two fails to make par because it loves golf too much; season one, with the baffling metaverse vr episode, the underground mafia roguelike golf-to-the-death course, the woman who golfs so hard her robotic arm explodes, and the inexplicable Bandai property references, is the way to go.
I hate golf in the way only an eldest daughter forced into golf lessons hates golf. When Birdie Wing hates golf – when Eve swaggers onto the course in her stupid outfits, refusing to adhere to any etiquette, uses only three clubs and slaps a ball directly into the flag to drop it straight down? I love that. When she lifts her driver and points it and says she’ll kill somebody with it? I love that.
Also like when Aoi says she’ll get her attention with this and pulls her extra long driver out and holds it like a strap. And then her beleaguered caddie talks about how Aoi pierces everyone through with an innocent smile. That was good.
The thing that stuck with me the most wasn’t actually any of the golf shenanigans – it was the way that Eve effectively shoots Aoi down when they discover that they shared a father and were therefore half-sisters. Well, it’s yuri – incest is just something you get used to. Except then it gets revealed that that was a fakeout, because Aoi’s dad was actually her dad’s best friend and her parents were in a throuple that the dad who raised her left behind to secretly raise Eve. Also her dad is Amuro Reiya and also Char Aznable is in this one? And the HG Turn A Gundam? Don’t forget to increment the Lesbian Cuckold clock up to five – Aoi herself and her poor caddy, who didn’t deserve a mysterious blonde swooping in like that.
Oh god I didn’t even mention Vipere, the slutty snake-themed bisexual underground mafia golfer (you know, for the underground golf mafia) who uses pheromones to control her opponents, gets outgolfed, and then shonen-rival style sticks around to help out whenever somebody needs a car (as the girls are too young to drive).
Shlock: Absolutely
Lesbian: Somehow
Watchability: High
Quality: Better than it had any right to be
Maria Holic
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Content Warnings: Transphobia, Bad Taste, Fanservice
Kanako Miyamae is a hopeless hapless lesbian excited to attend Lily Yuri Girls Only Academy. She falls in love with a beautiful blonde girl, the queen of the school – and discovers her ideal gf is actually a boy crossdressing to attend the academy who wants nothing more than to torment her sexually.
Maria Holic works like this: Mariya wants something from Kanako, and wears a sexual little outfit/exposes his feet/blows her a kiss/strips his maid’s top off to control her through her sexuality or just because he feels like it and she falls over of anime nosebleed disorder before she remembers “oh right Mariya is a boy” and starts eating her own organs Pearl Steven Universe style. Occasionally a girl who calls herself god will say something uninteresting. Kanako has a little pervert fantasy about one of her classmates. The cast has a reference-heavy Studio Shaft Conversation. Kanako can’t get Mariya out of her head. God I had to retype every ‘him’ up there from a ‘her’ because there is no way that little bitch is anything but a girl – it just doesn’t stick in my head. They don’t make boys like that. Torturing a girl like that is a female trait.
If you don’t want to watch a lesbian get relentlessly edged by a brat this show may not be for you. In all honesty even with Studio Shaft direction I found this almost completely unwatchable but it does earn its slot here. If you want a good Studio Shaft yuri show? Go watch Madoka Magica or Hidasketch.
It does have an excellent opening though.
Shlock: High
Lesbian: Well it has at least one
Watchability: No
Quality: No
Re: Cutie Honey
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Content Warnings: It’s Basically Just Porn At This Point. but god. Natsuko Aki
“Honey Flash!” yeah she sure does huh
Transforming android Honey Kisaragi fights against evil organization Panther Claw, with the reluctant help of her annoyed cop eventual bestie Na-chan. This is good, actually. Go watch it.
Seriously. The animation is so fun and vibrant! They do the super-cost-saving stills being moved thing in a very high-energy way that comes across as a reference to the original manga format and then every so often they’ll pull out absolutely incredible action sequences.
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Look at this!!! Her triangular stompy steps! The super low line count on her as she slowly advances with the gun flying toward her hand! Her Go Nagai snarl!!!!! It’s a real treat for the eyes even without the naked women. There’s only so much “saving your best friend by the power of being naked and kissing” you can do before it stops being bait and starts just being They Are In Love.
Shlock: Absolutely
Lesbian: NATSUKO AKI
Watchability: High
Quality: Yeah
Akiba Maid War
Content Warnings: Genre-Typical, No Spoilers Don’t Worry About it
Go watch this right now.
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Shlock: Less than you’d think
Lesbian: Yes
Watchability: Extreme
Quality: Genuine
A Very Specific Set Of Monogatari Arcs
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Content Warnings: yeah that guy is sexually harassing that 11 year old and also that tiny little vampire and also both of his little sisters.
Show beloved by pretentious internet perverts.
Alright. You are going to watch Episodes 1-8 of Bakemonogatari Season 1, (skipping 3-5 depending on your tolerance for watching small girls getting sexually harassed) and then you are going to watch the five episodes of standalone arc Hanamonogatari, halfway through Season 2. If you really like Hanekawa, who is bisexual, watch 11-15, Neko Black and Neko White. If you really like animation, watch Kizu. Do not be tricked into thinking more of this show will be gay because Hanekawa and Senjougahara had sex in a shower once. If your goggles are really on tight, enjoy Nadeko Draw but you’ll have to sit through the previous Nadeko and Yotsugi arcs to get there and I can’t in good conscience recommend you do that.
Shlock: Less than you'd think
Lesbian: One
Watchability: SHAFT
Quality: Yes
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transxfiles · 9 months ago
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thinking a lot about the phenomenon of celebrities going through their "baby gay" phase in the spotlight. idk i know it's funny to joke about jojo siwa and "gay pop" etc etc and there's so much valid criticism there. but i also think there's something to be said about how pop culture forces queer people out of the closet which means that if celebrities try to work through their baby gay phase on their own they're considered "traitors" or "liars" or "queerbaiting" etc etc for trying to keep their sexuality private, but if they decide to come out as soon as they know "what they are" they become cringe in the eye of the public bc they're still figuring out what it means to be queer. idk. like even with chappell roan, i know she's a pop culture darling rn and i adore her. but sometimes she says stuff in interviews that feels so baby gay and i have to remind myself that she's just. a young person who is in the spotlight and figuring herself out still. and even with the jojo siwa thing like. again obv she sounds so ignorant when she talks about wanting to "invent gay pop" but it's also like. god. figuring my gender/sexuality business out was stressful enough when i was sitting alone in my bathroom at age 13. i cannot imagine growing up in the spotlight with hundreds of cameras and millions of eyes on me. and then having to be my "cringe" newly out queer self to the masses. idk lots to chew on. i've just been thinking about this a lot recently.
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wikiangela · 10 months ago
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we don't know where this is going now (don't be afraid of heights, let me open your heart wide)
bucktommy rating: G words: 5.6k summary: Tommy cuts their first date short, but to his surprise he gets a call from Evan just a few days later. or, 7x05 from Tommy's POV.
[read on Ao3]
It’s honestly a surprise when just a few days later, late in the evening, Tommy’s phone rings, and Evan’s name pops up. His traitorous heart beats a little faster when he answers the call and leans against the kitchen counter, where he’s been finishing up making a late dinner. “Evan?” he asks, confused but trying to play it casually. He’s good at that. He thinks years of pretending, trying to act straight, playing off gay jokes and even joining in to not make anyone suspicious made him way too good at acting cool and unbothered. He’s definitely surprised and excited, though. “Hey.” he smiles to himself. “Uh, hey- hi, Tommy, hey.” Evan stutters, and Tommy can imagine that flustered smile.  “Hi.” Tommy greets him again, grinning now. “Gotta say, I didn’t really expect you to call.” “I- I know, I just- I wanted to talk?” he says it more like a question, then huffs quietly, takes a breath. “I was wondering if you’d like to grab a coffee. With me. Tomorrow morning?” he says, sounding nervous but hopeful. And Tommy- Tommy has had a very hard time trying to say no to Evan, especially when he doesn’t actually want to. Besides, they can be friends, if whatever potential for romance didn’t work out. He’d be fine with that. He’s friends with Eddie, anyway, so he’ll surely have to be around Evan sometimes, and he doesn’t want it to be weird. “If you’re not- if you’re not busy? “Yeah, okay.” Tommy responds, trying to ignore the excitement swirling in his stomach at just the thought of seeing Evan. “I can do morning. What time?” “Uh, how’s nine? There’s this place I usually go to- I can text you the location? Or we can meet somewhere you like, that’s totally-” “Evan.” Tommy interrupts softly, still smiling. Even over the phone, even still this nervous, Evan is just adorable. “I’m sure your pick is fine. Just text me, and I’ll be there. Tomorrow at nine.” he assures. He thinks if Evan wanted to meet right at this second, he’d be there in a heartbeat. Which is a surprising thought. He really didn’t want to get attached this fast, but there’s just something about Evan… “Okay.” Evan breathes out. “So- so I’ll text you.” he repeats. “And I’ll see you tomorrow.” “See you tomorrow.” Tommy says, before Evan stumbles through a goodbye and hangs up, and Tommy just chuckles to himself. He’s curious what Evan wants to talk to him about. But he also needs to be careful, because he can see himself falling for him so fast and deep and easy. He shakes his head at himself. He’s being silly and ridiculous. Evan makes him feel silly and ridiculous and giddy, and Tommy doesn’t remember the last time he felt like this. 
[read on Ao3]
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defectivevillain · 1 month ago
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the slow surrender
pairing: Chishiya Shuntaro & Reader
reader's race & gender are ambiguous; no pronouns or physical descriptors are used.
“Number 10.” You quickly turn around, only to find Chishiya—the No. 11 player from the Beach. There's a note of something unreadable in his voice; his hands are shoved in his pockets as he takes a leisurely step forward. “The deserter.”
word count: 2.4k | ao3 version | chishiya playlist
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warnings: Alice in Borderland manga spoilers; canon-typical violence, existentialism
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author's notes: Chishiya/Reader is the focus of this fic, but there’s nothing explicitly romantic. I mean… canonically, he hardly has any feelings, so it felt out of character to write anything too crazy. Leaning heavily on the "Strangers to Begrudging Allies" theme here.
Look at this man and tell me he isn’t 100% gay, though. YOU CAN’T. This fic's really for the gays and theys.
The title of this fic is from Should I by Sir Chloe, because I'm obsessed with their music.
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Since the moment you first arrived in the Borderlands, you have given yourself one rule: keep other players at a distance. You arrived to this strange land alone; and, if things go according to plan, you will leave alone, too. In the Borderlands, friends are nothing more than a hindrance. And you were quickly convinced of this fact after emerging from your first game, 2♥, entirely alone. 
But then you hear whispers. At your fourth game, 4♣,  you manage to overhear a conversation between a group of four players, who made reference to a place called ‘the Beach.’ You were equally curious and wary; you didn’t exactly want to trust other players, but you also knew getting more information would give you an advantage in the coming games. With that in mind, after you completed 4♣, you started looking for this ‘Beach.’ 
Unsurprisingly, your journey was not exactly straightforward. It took you a few days of searching to find a map of Tokyo, and subsequently realize that ‘the Beach’ wasn’t genuinely a beach, but instead a hotel called Tama Pacific Beach. The moment your eyes found the hotel, you knew it was the place you heard about. 
You only wish it was a little less… Well. It’s hard to organize your thoughts as you stare at the sprawling hotel. The sparkling waters of the swimming pool glitter in the mid-morning sunlight; people lounge about on beach chairs and soak up the sun; there’s the faint hum of music filling the air. One thing’s for sure: this place doesn’t look like it belongs in the Borderlands. It’s everything you didn’t expect: there’s laughter, joy, amusement, sloth, gluttony. It’s some sort of dreamscape, away from the reality of the games. 
Your arrival doesn’t go unnoticed, however, and you’re soon given a tour of the building by the No. 1 ranked player, Hatter. You learn almost an overwhelming amount of information in a short span of time. First, players are ranked according to their skill level and participation in games. The top nine players are considered “Executives” and given more authority. Then, each night, players are sorted into optimized groups according to their speciality and sent to finish games. Next, every new card earned upon the completion of a game must be given to the No. 1 ranked player. The No 1. ranked player will collect all 51 playing cards and, according to Hatter, be able to escape the Borderlands. (You’re very skeptical about that part.)
It’s frighteningly easy to ascertain the truth of the Beach. Players are lured in with the promise of security, entirely unaware that they will be exploited for their playing cards. From there, they’re free to live a life of “luxury” while being occasionally called upon to complete games. Assuming they don’t die, they will slowly rise through the ranks of the Beach. It’s all a rather transparent ploy. Yet… you fell for it, didn’t you? Now you’re trapped here with no real means of escape. After all, the third rule of the Beach—“Death to all traitors”—was established to prevent people from leaving. 
And while you have no desire to stay any longer than you need to, you know escape will be a dangerous and difficult affair. Just a simple stroll along the boardwalk is enough to confirm that the players are serious about the third rule: corpses are piled up so high that they nearly block the water’s flow. It’s a sickening sight that reminds you of the cruelty lying hidden underneath this utopia.
You have no choice but to play along. And, for a while, you do. You participate in games when you’re assigned to them; you comply with the rules of the Beach; and you keep your head down. Slowly but surely, you ascend the ranks of the players. Your victory in the 8♥ game is particularly impactful; as the only remaining survivor of the group, you quickly shoot up the ranks to find yourself at the No. 10 rank. And while that attracts some attention, after that, you make sure to be as forgettable as possible. You fade to the background in any subsequent games you’re called to play in. You make sure to keep to yourself. You don’t speak to anyone. You avoid leaving your room whenever possible. And slowly but surely, people start to forget about you. 
Still, you need a more concrete plan of escape. In an ideal world, you’d make off with the stash of playing cards before leaving. That kind of thing would be possible if you were No. 9 or higher. But since you’re not an Executive rank, you don’t have access to the penthouse where the cards are kept. Although, if your suspicions are correct… the playing cards aren’t nearly as important as they’re said to be. After all, Hatter was the only one to assert that they were the key to escaping the Borderlands. There is no one else to verify his claims. And you get the feeling the cards aren’t genuinely important; rather, they’re a construct. With the playing cards, the players at the Beach all have a common goal—which eliminates any unnecessary conflict. They’re nothing more than an empty promise. 
Accepting that the cards are useless provides you with more freedom. Combined with your efforts to slip under the radar, you think you will have a decent chance at escaping. After all, there’s no one to stop you from sneaking out in the dead of night, when even the wildest of party-goers have gone to sleep (or, more accurately, passed out). And that’s exactly what you do one night. The Beach is quiet at such a late hour—while everyone seems to behave with reckless abandon in the daytime, they still recognize the importance of a full night’s sleep. A player needs to keep their wits about them if they want to win the games. You sneak past the pool outside, quietly closing the gate behind you before breaking into a sprint. You want to put as much distance between you and this place as possible. Your heart almost seems to roar in your ears as your feet hit the pavement. You’re not sure how long you spend running before you finally take a quick break, ducking behind a wall and attempting to breathe with your hands on your knees. 
In the following few days, you’re very careful. Fortunately, you succeeded in a higher difficulty game the same morning you left the Beach, which gives you some more time to lay low and ensure you don’t draw attention to yourself. And you soon learn that your timing was particularly good, as you see smoke rising through the air in the distance. Something happened. Are the players at the Beach in a game right now? You don’t want to think about it. But, then again, maybe a game would distract them from your absence. You’re secretly hoping they’ll just forget about you.
You certainly don’t expect to be cornered by another player a day later, when the smoke clears in the air. 
“You.”  
You turn around to find yourself met with a cunning, scrutinizing gaze. Your eyes widen as you recognize the guy standing across from you: Chishiya Shuntaro. He was one of the higher-ranking players at the Beach, just one rank below you. He stands before you wearing a simple collared shirt and slacks; his long light hair frames his angular features well. 
Chishiya seems to recognize you too. “Number 10.” He says, a note of something unreadable in his voice. His hands are shoved in his pockets as he takes a leisurely step forward. “The deserter.” You roll your eyes at the title. You thought you had slipped away unnoticed, but Chishiya’s presence here disproves that notion “They’re still looking for you, you know.” He hums casually. He’s regarding you expectantly, as if waiting to study your reaction. 
You stare at him for a long moment. Your heart instinctually jumps at his statement, before you remember yourself. “I don’t think so.” You frown, thinking back to the pandemonium you heard from afar. Despite the fact that the smoke cleared from the air, Chishiya has still been the only one to find you. “They died in the game, probably.” You then say. He's playing mind games—or, at least, attempting to. What reason would he have to lie to you, other than to provoke your fear or test you? 
Chishiya raises a brow, suddenly appearing intrigued. “How do you know that?” You suppose his curiosity is justified, since you left the Beach several days before the next game occurred. It’s been a few days since then. 
“I listened.” You settle for saying. Indeed, it was hard not to hear the agonized screams and cries of the victims. The Borderlands are rather quiet, without sounds of the crowded city and hums of electricity to disrupt the air. Many people died during that game, as far as you could tell. Their anguish was audible; not to mention, the disgusting smell of burning flesh pervaded the surrounding area. You shudder in remembrance. The foul odor still lingers heavily in the air. Just how many people died during that game? 
You break out of your thoughts to find Chishiya staring at you warily. You feel like some sort of specimen under a microscope. After a moment, he speaks again. “You’re interesting.” 
You don’t know what to say to that, so you remain silent. You get the feeling that his interest is rather dangerous. 
“What games are you best at?” He scrutinizes you for a moment, gaze wandering across your form. “♥, I assume.” At your nod, he hums. “You should’ve stayed for the game at the beach, then. It was 10♥: Witch Hunt.” You frown. Witch Hunt? That rather ominous name only confirms your suspicions regarding the many casualties and few survivors. That isn’t exactly a good omen for whatever game will come next.
As if sensing your thoughts, Chishiya continues. “Let’s play the next game together.” He offers. There’s a long pause where neither of you speak; and you just stare at him. He looks back at you, raising a brow. “You seem skeptical.” He then observes with a dangerous smile. You hoped silence would make him lose interest; if anything, Chishiya’s gaze has only intensified. 
You decide to abandon pretense. There is no real need for it in the Borderlands, after all. “You don’t seem the type to ally with someone out of the goodness of your heart,” you say. While you kept to yourself at the Beach, you were still sure to study up on the higher ranking players. Chishiya was No. 11, the number directly beneath your ranking as No. 10. And he was always regarded as a slippery, enigmatic individual who prioritized himself over all else. “You’ve probably betrayed everyone you’ve met so far.” 
Chishiya doesn’t seem offended by the statement. Instead, he lets out a strange choking sound; it takes you a few seconds to realize he’s laughing. “I was right,” he says inexplicably. “You are interesting.”
You frown; the two of you are locked in some sort of staring contest. You can’t bring yourself to look away from him—he is too dangerous for you to feel comfortable doing so. Chishiya seems unable to look away from you, either—although you don’t quite believe he’s threatened by you. As time passes, your conversation slowly turns into a game of its own. You ask a question; Chishiya answers; then you answer. Then Chishiya asks a question; you answer; and so on. It’s a strange cycle of wariness and mistrust, perpetuated for what feels like infinity. But at some point, the two of you have exchanged enough information to begrudgingly trust one another. 
And soon, you reach an unspoken agreement. When you turn your back and head off in the direction you were planning on going, Chishiya is at your side. The two of you are silent as you traverse the city pavement. There is little fanfare as you search buildings for supplies and shelter. 
“Have you been alone this whole time?” Chishiya asks later, as the sun begins to climb further down on the horizon. You nod. “Impressive.”
“It’s easier that way,” you say. You think back to the 2♥ game you participated in on your first night; to the seemingly inseparable group of girls who promptly turned on each other at a moment’s notice. This is not a place to make friends. You get the sense Chishiya feels the same. Indeed, he nods in agreement at your statement. 
There’s a comfortable silence in the air for a while. Then, unexpectedly, Chishiya breaks through it. He’s staring up at the starry night sky. “What do you think is the secret of the Borderlands?” His voice is quiet but steady. You wonder if he’s genuinely searching for the answer, or if he’s just curious about your perspective. Hell, maybe he’s just asking to pass the time. Regardless, you attempt to answer anyway. 
“It could be anything,” you sigh. Every single player here is plagued by thoughts of just what secrets this place could possess. But those thoughts are often far too distracting. In the time you spent looking for any one answer, you were dominated by fear and unease. “The Borderlands defy rationality.” You continue. 
“You’ve stopped looking for an answer.” Chishiya analyzes. 
You nod, your throat burning. “I feared I wouldn’t like what I found, if I were to keep searching.”
“Yes, it is quite a dreary affair,” Chishiya says. “Virtual reality, temporal displacement… There is no convenient, safe explanation.”
“We don’t even know what we’re fighting for,” you remark. If your voice sounds particularly raspy or hollow, he doesn’t mention it. “Life could exist outside of this place. Yet we fight tirelessly, under the conviction that death here is the end.”
A slight nod, then silence. “I never felt alive,” Chishiya admits after a moment. You chance a sidelong glance at him, only to find his gaze is still fixed on the limitless expanse of sky above. “Before.”
“Me neither.” You admit. “Life seemed quieter before. Safer, but also boring. I grew complacent.”
You shake your head. “There is no explanation for the Borderlands,” you finish. You’re not sure who you’re trying to convince. Chishiya’s gaze falls to you; for a moment, the silence almost seems to buzz. The air is chilly yet stiff. You struggle to keep your composure under his watchful eye. Just what is he looking for? What does he want from you? 
“I don’t think I quite mind that.” Chishiya says after an immeasurable amount of time passes. Somehow, the admission feels far more vulnerable than it sounds. 
“Me neither.” You eventually answer. 
You both look up to the sky once more, a sense of tranquility washing over you amidst your newfound companionship.
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chelledoggo · 8 months ago
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i have had it up to here with anti-theists bro like...
yes i know that horrible things have been and continue to be done in the name of Christ (who would not be cool with it btw) but like.
don't act like every single person who identifies as Christian is either willingly aligning themselves with genocide or (in the case of queer Christians like myself) a "traitor" or a "self-hating gay."
if you feel uncomfortable with religion, that is your right. and my heart goes out to you if you have suffered religious trauma.
but those of us who want to live affirming Christian lives and unlearn religious trauma while keeping our faith aren't hurting anyone.
(don't interact with this post if you're just going to tell me i'm wrong and a horrible person.)
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blushweddinggowns · 1 year ago
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Prompt number 2 bc I’m praying for more jealous Steve content. Bc Eddie can be so oblivious and Steve can be such a bitch and those things are so important to me
Eddie was a glutton for self-punishment, that was the only reasonable explanation he could come up with on what the fuck he was doing here. Sitting at some random gay bar as he watched the man he loved dance the night away with his bestfriend.
He just had to volunteer to be their designated driver. Maybe it was stupid, but Eddie thought that y'know, a gay bar meant that no he would not have to watch Steve flirt with some randos. But he forgot the small detail that bisexual people existed. And he had seen at least three damn girls slip Steve their number.
Which was just...so fucking cruel. Why did life always have to do him so dirty? Eddie had thought that maybe...if they went to this type of place together Steve's mind would open up a bit. A stupid fucking thought honestly. Based off of nearly nothing. Like, okay sure, Steve was all touchy feely with him sometimes. When he was high or drunk suddenly Eddie became his personal chair. And he would say just...the sweetest shit. Going on and on about how happy he was to have met him, how he's so glad he's alive and well, how funny Eddie was, how nice and sweet and pretty and...and all of it had sent his traitorous brain into a tailspin that had him thinking he actually had a chance with a straight guy.
And the fucked up part was that Eddie had really tried to start doing the right thing. He put a little distance between them when he figured out that he was past a silly crush. No he was head over heels for the guy and he needed to get over it. Fast. And if he could just start saying no when Steve called to get high or have a few beers together he probably would have made some progress by now.
But no, he was still to eager for contact with him to say no. Which made him feel like a creep, always waiting around for Steve to be a little out of his mind just so he could get a hug.
When did he become so pathetic?
The only slight comfort he had tonight was the fact that he wasn't alone. It really wasn't fair to bring a straight guy to a place like this, but at least every guy who had eyes on Steve was going to have to suffer in silence with him.
And some of them were kind of cute. Cute enough for Eddie to try and use one as a distraction. He was sitting next to a preppy looking guy, talking to him a little bit. Maybe he shouldn't have set his eyes on someone that kind of looked like Steve, but fuck it. His name was Andrew, and he was nice, a good flirt. The perfect diversion for when Eddie could tear his eyes away from Steve.
And things were actually getting a little interesting with him. He had his hand on Eddie's arm, leaning in to loudly whisper everything he said in Eddie's ear. He was smiling at him, close enough for Eddie to see the pretty gold flakes in his eyes.
They weren't as pretty as Steve's but they'd do.
Andrew tucked a bit of Eddie's hair back behind his ear, leaning in again. But he didn't go for his ear this time, no, he was zeroing in right to Eddie's lips. Not that he was complaining, he let it happen, a sweet, light kiss that had zero time to escalate to more.
Because suddenly, someone was tugging at his arm, hard enough to force Eddie's whole body back, nearly out of his chair. He blinked, more than a little startled to see Steve coming out of nowhere, clinging onto him with that stupid, gorgeous smile.
"Eddieeee," Steve whined, completely ignoring Andrew's presence, "Robin ditched me to make out with someone in the bathroom."
Eddie couldn't help but smile a little bit, despite the fact that he was definitely interrupting what was probably the first good thing about this night. He glanced over at Andrew, who was staring at them, wide-eyed before saying, "Uh, I didn't know you had a boyfriend."
"I don't-"
"I can't hear you in here," Steve loudly interrupted, looking adorably confused, "Come outside with me?"
If Eddie was smart, he would have gently pried Steve's hands off him before sending him off to find Robin. But...a drunk Steve was also a very cute and cuddly one. So fuck it, Eddie could find a rebound for his non-existent relationship next weekend.
He shrugged at Andrew, mouthing a quick apology at him before Steve started to drag him outside through the back door. Eddie half expected Steve to do his usual routine when he was toasted. Sweetly asking for a piggy back ride that Eddie literally could never refuse before falling asleep on his back. Then he'd get him in the car, wrangle Robin from wherever the hell she was, and they'd be off.
But the second they were stepping outside Steve was straightening up and stepping back, to Eddie's immediate confusion. He leaned against the wall, glaring at Eddie in a way he had never seen. Or at least directed at him.
"So," Steve started, his tone way too close to how he sounded when one of the kids pissed him off, "Who was that guy? You looked pretty cozy in there."
Eddie's brain was still struggling to catch up to the change in atmosphere here. But he tried to answer anyway, "I mean we were but-wait. Why are you not drunk? You were literally just-"
"It's called acting dipshit," Steve mumbled, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Which ow, rude. But his next words hurt even more, "Not like I have a choice, since you only seem to like me when I'm fucked up."
Eddie could feel his heart stop in his chest. He didn't-oh no. Oh god. Steve figured out he was a creep. A creep who was probably moments away from getting his ass handed to him.
Eddie swallowed, at a loss for what to say. But he still tried, "I-look dude it's um, it's not like that. I didn't- I wasn't trying to make you uncomfortable-"
"Then why the fuck would you kiss another guy right in front of me?"
Okay. That was enough of that. Yes, Steve could be mad about him being creepy, but no he couldn't be mad over having to bear witness for a gay kiss at a gay bar, "Well if I had known that you were apparently only okay with seeing girls kiss each other I wouldn't have come out tonight at all! Honestly Steve, how can you even say that? Like that is some real dumbass levels of homophobia, even for you. I thought the King Steve thing had died-"
"Shut the fuck up oh my god," Steve hissed out, "Are you really that damn dense? That's what you think I'm upset about? Are you fucking kidding me? And I'm the dumbass?"
"Then why are you mad?" Eddie half asked, half yelled.
“I’m not mad," Steve seethed, like he didn't look about five seconds away from choking Eddie out, "I...I just think you can choose better people to kiss.”
Maybe he really was drunk after all. Because now he wasn't making any damn sense.
Eddie pinched the bridge of his nose, beyond frustrated, "Who Steve? Like, I'm sorry to break this to you but not all of us can fucking look like you do alright? We're not all charming, golden Adonis basketball players okay? And sometimes you need to take what you can get. And there was nothing wrong with Andrew-"
"You think I look like a golden Adonis?" Steve interrupted, a weird expression on his face. He looked almost...hopeful? But that didn't make any sense.
"That's what you got out of that?" Eddie asked, exasperated, "I-come one dude. You know you're hot. But that's not my point."
"Well it's mine!" Steve groaned. He was biting his lips, a very distracting nervous habit that Eddie had picked up on, "Because what the fuck are we even doing? You think I'm so hot, so charming, so great, and you decide to kiss someone else in front of me? What the fuck is that? Do you like seeing me jealous? Do you get off on me pining? Please explain."
You see, that was the funny thing about Eddie's brain. One second he was lost, staring at Steve's red, bitten lips, and the next he was desperately trying to catch up with what just came out of his mouth. All of it the perfect blend to effectively shut his brain off completely.
Eddie stared at him, his words as dumb as how his face probably looked, "I-what? Huh?"
Steve narrowed his eyes at him, "Are we really doing this? Are you going to pretend like it's all in my head?"
"I-no. I just-please explain," Eddie is pretty damn sure he had never stuttered through a sentence that hard in his life.
"I've been coming on to you for months and you just keep giving me all of these mixed signals and..." Steve sighed, looking away, "I'm so sick of it Eddie. If you don't like me just say that! Stop whatever this is. Because it's mean and you know it. If you want a better option then just take it already and leave me alone."
He-what-that didn't even- Steve was straight, wasn't he? And now the stuttering had invaded his thoughts. Because if he actually understood all of that then...
He was the biggest idiot on the planet.
And his stunned silence was not helping anything.
Steve sighed, pushing himself away from the wall. He turned away, "I'm going to find Robin. We can just...act like this didn't happen I guess. I'm done."
Eddie had to give himself on thing, at least his body was working a lot faster than his brain. Steve barely had time to take a single step away before he was shooting his hand out to grab his wrist, stopping him in his tracks.
"I didn't know you were an option!" Eddie blurted out, his heart hammering in his chest, "I-Stevie I thought all of it was in my head. I-I thought that you were straight and we were just hanging out-"
"You think I sit in the laps of my other guy friends?" Steve asked, completely unimpressed, "While playing with their hair and calling them beautiful? Really, dude?"
Eddie nodded, sure and fast, "Steve, I had to do my senior year three damn times. I'm not always the smartest okay? And in my defense you never mentioned like dudes-"
"Yes I have," Steve interrupted, "When you came out to me, I told you to your face that I understand. That I could relate about hiding things and not talking about it. I literally said we were in the same boat. What else could that mean?"
Eddie remembered that, crystal clear. But..."I thought you were talking about PTSD, not secretly being into dudes."
"One dude," Steve corrected, but he was relaxing a little, thank fuck. Maybe Eddie could still fix this.
He took a deep breath, using his hold on Steve's wrist to pull him closer. His hands were fucking shaking, bad enough for Steve to almost certainly notice when he rested them on his hips.
This was it, he might as well be as clear as humanly possible, "I am so into you. Like a scary amount. Like I'm...borderline in love with you."
He was completely in love with him, but he didn't have the balls to say that bit out loud. He kept going, "And I didn't know you felt the same way. At all. Like I am dangerously close to having a stroke from hearing all of that. You kind of flipped my world upside down there."
Steve huffed out a laugh. Eddie may have fucked up everything leading up to this point, but Steve was eating his little speech right up. He shuffled a little closer, wrapping his arms around Eddie's neck with a small smile, "Keep going."
"I thought that I had no chance. I mean even tonight, people couldn't stop looking at you. And you got those numbers-"
"I threw them away," Steve interrupted, "You missed that part."
He had definitely missed that part, too caught up in his own head. But that didn't stop a smile from breaking out on Eddie's face, "Good. Because if you want me, you have me. I'm all yours, in any way you want me. Understand? Fuck, Stevie if I had known any of this we'd be the ones making out in the bathroom right now. And I'm sorry about..."
For the life of him Eddie couldn't remember his name, not when he had Steve smiling at him in his arms, "The other guy. But it literally means nothing to me. Not if I get to have you. Do...do I get to have you?"
Steve hummed, pretending to think about it while he played with a lock of Eddie's hair, "I guess that depends. Is making out in the bathroom still on the table?"
"Fuck yes it is."
Steve grinned, leaning up to press the sweetest little kiss to the side of Eddie's mouth, "Then I guess you have me then."
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genderkoolaid · 1 year ago
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I'm sorry but you people have demeaned the word lesbian so badly... the LITERAL definition of a lesbian is a NON-MAN who likes NON-MEN. How is that so fucking hard to understand? Not you specifically, but people like you have made it into something it's not; the whole "bi lesbian" and "straight lesbian" shit, saying trans men can date lesbians (which is literally just transphobic), straight up just saying lesbians can date men???? MEN???? DO YOU NOT HEAR YOURSELVES?
And now the whole butch discourse lmao. Sure, maybe in days long past it was a broader term, but today when someone hears the word butch, I can guarantee their minds will jump to a butch lesbian. If y'all want it to be the GBT community so bad then just say so
Also I can guarantee that you were one of the mfs laughing at lesbians who used he/him or he/they pronouns back in 2020 lmao performative ass bitch
Definitions of words do not descend from Heaven straight from the lips of God. We make them up! So I simply disagree with your definition of lesbian, as do many others. Personally, I enjoy the definition of "queer love/desire for women." For one, it centers lesbianism around women, instead of centering it around the exclusion of men. And two, "non-men loving non-men" is a definition which utterly erases nonbinary people. If an agender person is dating a neutrois person, they are not lesbians- or gay men- simply because y'all cannot get your head out of your binary asses for five seconds. "Non-men loving non-men" is a definition that attempts to be nonbinary-inclusive but only succeeds in making nonbinary & genderqueer identities palatable for radical feminism and political lesbianism. Honestly, I would prefer someone who defines lesbian as "woman loving woman" but understands that many people have complex relationships with womanhood while still feeling attached to the label of lesbian, than someone who uses this "NB-inclusive" definition and goes absolutely feral over genderqueers who are Doing It Wrong.
Anyways, speaking of radical feminism: acknowledging male lesbians and mspec lesbians is not "making lesbianism something its not." It is just recognizing the beautiful complexity that has always existed within lesbianism.
The lesbian community- which I'm using to refer to all kinds of communities organized around queer relationships to women & womanhood- has always been a haven for a lot more people than cis women exclusively into other cis women. The idea of sexuality-as-identity is very recent, and the idea of drawing a hard line between people who only like people of the same gender and people who like the same gender and more is also extremely recent. Beyond that, trans men and nonbinary people have always taken shelter under lesbianism. "Butch" in the context of lesbianism has always been a trans* identity, a way for people with a queer gender to find community and safety.
The reason why we have this idea of lesbianism as a strict category with hard borders is..... you guessed it..... radical feminism! And specifically "political lesbianism," which essentially placed woman-only relationships as the only true feminist relationship you could have. "Lesbian" became a political identity because of its focus on woman-woman relationships. But that meant that, for political lesbianism to be acceptable to radical feminism, it needed to conform to radical feminist beliefs about what makes a good feminist. Which meant:
No trans women or fems (because they are too male and probably predators)
No trans men or mascs (because they are too male and also traitors)
No bisexuals (because they are too male by association and are also traitors)
No penetrative sex, or at least no strap ons (because it imitates men)
No kinky sex (see above but with bonus "kink is evil" flavoring)
No butch/femme roles (because they imitate heterosexuality; everyone has to be neutrally androgynous).
I believe that much of modern lesbian discourse comes from trying to marry lingering radfem beliefs with modern attempts at trans-inclusivity. So you adapt the blatant transphobia: now, trans women are allowed in (as long as they are palatable to cis women), because they're women! And nonbinary people can also be allowed in- at first they were woman-aligned, and then later as long as they weren't man-aligned. Being butch/femme is Back In Style, but we have to soothe the gender anxiety that butches cause by assuring everyone that only True Lesbians can be butch, and butches are always women, even if they kind of aren't, but regardless they're definitely not men, because butch has always been a lesbian term (except it hasn't.) The discourse is haunted by the ideas that lesbianism is constantly under attack, more than anyone else, and that lesbian culture is unique and special and must be guarded from (male/-aligned) invaders who are probably also sexual predators.
To say that this is all just "days long pasts" ignores both that, in physical queer spaces there very much still are male lesbians and bi lesbians who are accepted parts of their local communities, and that you only see those days as "long past" because of the impact of radical feminism on lesbianism. The only reason you see these changes as a good thing is because you've swallowed radical feminist ideas without realizing it.
Also, "if you say butch most people will think of butch lesbians" is an extremely silly argument. Literally who fucking cares. If you say "man" there are still a lot of people who will immediately think of exclusively cis men (see: every feminist who says shit like "if men could get pregnant). Does that mean that trans men should just give up their identities because other people don't understand them? You dork?
Anyways. The funniest part of this ask is how damn confident you are that I was apparently hating on he/him lesbians three years ago. Idk how to tell you this but I'm a boygirl gaylesbianbisexual and have identified this way for years. I have been personally terrorized by shitty lesbian identity politics, the same ones you are repeating now, which told me that if I was even 1% male then identifying as a lesbian made me a disgusting predator. Which caused me years of suffering because no matter how hard I tried, I could not ignore my multigenderedness and how that affected my sexuality. Sowwy but you look silly as hell and your argument is bad and you should feel bad </3
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genderqueerdykes · 24 days ago
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With the trans man thing
I've had to apologize for being a transgender man and being a traitor to society
I've had to apologize and say I'm not trying to be transphobic when I say I'm somewhat tired of seeing transfem 🌽 filling all of the transmasc and man tags
I've even been pushed to de-masculineize myself and my existence for others (I'm pre-t witu voice training, have a naturally masculine build from work, and dress masc). I've been outright requested to come to events in drag for others' comfort, or even act "gayer" (I'm a gay man, but not a Twink or small to them)
It all feels like a dysphoria exchange. For you to feel comfortable, I need to feel like I'm trapped in the wrong body AGAIN
There's a rise in trans men being called "twink" as essentially a slur by people who feel threatened by someone wanting not to be a woman or who just don't believe we are "qualified' to be men
Maybe this take is fucked up
Maybe I'm not emotionally mature enough to see the nuances of all of this
But the rising hate of anyone or thing that is masculine is so damaging
You hate the patriarchy, not the people who are comfortable as themselves
Why do transmascs/men have to become villains in order to be seen as men? Why do we have to give up being good people in the eyes of others? That, or forget being a man entirely for someone else's comfort?
i've noticed that also to be the case, im not entirely sure why, but i rarely go into transmasc tags because of that. i have no clue where there's so much straight up por n in our tags that's not even of transmasculine people. it drowns out most of the other content. very strange. not sure if i understand why this is
I've been outright requested to come to events in drag for others' comfort, or even act "gayer" (I'm a gay man, but not a Twink or small to them) There's a rise in trans men being called "twink" as essentially a slur by people who feel threatened by someone wanting not to be a woman or who just don't believe we are "qualified' to be men
i don't think you're fucked up for being upset that people are asking you to literally change how you act and present yourself because other people refuse to accept you. that's such a fucked up thing for people to do to you. and yes people have literally been weaponizing a litany of queer slurs against trans men lately i have seen twink being thrown around in the most hateful ways possible. i lived with 2 trans girls who did it for a while. it's disturbing
i'm sorry you've gone through this. but you're not at fault for being hurt. you're being blamed for your own pain because other people think you deserve it for being masc and a man. you don't deserve it.
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