#I eat fast food maybe once a year tops and it always makes me so sick

[angelnumber27]

In America one of the big problems is that everything is designed to keep us sick so that we have to continue spending outrageous amounts of money on healthcare. They should really just call it sick care.. they don’t want people to get better. This country is a business and money is the top priority always

[corrodedcoffins-blog]

History Repeats Itself

masterlist

note: first jess one-shot!!! (and i'm actually proud of it???) also i say their baby is one but i don't know babies to well so if she's too advanced for a one year old, just cut me some slack

warnings: teen pregnancy, food/eating

word count: 4.7 k

♡ summary: Being a teen mom is hard but without any help it's even harder, after saving up enough she can finally move to Stars Hollow to be closer to her baby's father

♡ Jess Mariano x reader

request ✓

The bus ride down was long, and it only got worse as 1-year-old Caroline woke up from her nap and decided to let everyone know of the inconvenience. Finally after the long months of working and saving up she had enough to move to Stars Hollow, unlike Jess who had a parent to send them and an uncle to stay with, she saved up and made it happen. She wanted Caroline to be around her father, and she wanted to be close to Jess.

And Y/n’s always loved the idea of a small town, a place where you felt safe, a place she would feel safe raising her child in, a place that wasn’t $2,500 a month for a closet. Here she could give her daughter a lot more, here she would have a support system in Jess and Luke. Unlike what her parents would give her.

By this point in the bus route it was only the mother and daughter and a couple strays, she saw the messy haired boy sitting on a park bench close to the bus stop, of course he had his nose in a book. She started packing up Caroline’s stuff, tucking her blanket and toys in the basket of the stroller.

When she got to the bus doors, Jess quickly made his way to help her lift the stroller down the steps, when the stroller was once again on the ground Jess squats down getting face to face with his little girl, “Hey, Care!” “Daddy!” He lifted her up by her armpits. When the little girl was out of her seat and in her dad’s arms, her mom stacked their bags on the seat.

“Hi! You’re so big! Really she is. She’s growing up so fast.” “Well she can walk way more stable now. No more scaring, mommy that you’ll fall if I look away for a second.” She says the last sentence in baby voice while she tickles the girl’s belly to make her giggle and their foreheads to rest on each other’s.�� 

“So you gonna show us around?!” “‘Around’?” They continued their walk around the gazebo area, walking towards Luke’s. 

“This is it, that's the record shop, that’s the bookstore, that's Luke’s, and that’s all you need to know.” “Well where’s the bank, I might need to rob it later.” “You’ll find a job. And if you don’t then work at Luke’s, he could do with the time off then maybe he’d get off everyone’s backs.” “He’s probably stressed with you always causing trouble.” “Me? Trouble? Nooo, I’m a peach.”

-

Jess had the baby today since Y/n was off to find a job, her first stop was the most promising. Luke let her know that a friend of his needed extra staff at their Inn for an event that was coming up, someone who could be an assistant of sorts. So after wearing her most capable looking top, and best fitting jeans. She kissed Caroline’s check and yelled goodbye to Luke and Jess as she began her walk.

When she walked inside she saw a man at the front desk on the phone. Waiting to ask for directions, she hung around the man’s desk, busying herself with some pamphlet. She couldn't help but listen to the man’s angry English in his french accent.

Suddenly he hung up the phone and got back to writing whatever he was writing, without looking up and with an annoyed tone said, “Yes?” “I was looking for Lorelei, I’m here for-” “The assistant job, yes.. Follow me.” He walked quickly to wherever it was they were going, mumbling along the way, “Of course, an assistant. Just what we need around here. Not like I don’t already do most of the work around here.”

He opened the door for them, it ended up being the kitchen they were now in. A tall woman holding a to-go coffee cup that said ‘Luke’s’ on it and a shorter woman in an apron fighting with a scruffy man about vegetables, which look to be parsnips. 

“The mini-you is here.” “One little comment, Micheal. I’m not saying you’re incapable. I just want more help with organising events so I focus on planning!” “Whatever.” Turning on his heels, Micheal walked out the doors making his way back to his desk. 

“So you’ve met Micheal! Sorry, we usually don’t let him around the new people but we're a little short-staffed. Let’s head to the dining room.”

They sat down at a table in the dining room, Lorelei asked all the important questions, and Y/n was perfect, now she was just asking the things she’ll tell Sookie later when the woman asks about the new hire.

Taking a sip of her sixth coffee this morning Lorelei asked, “So, are you new to town? I haven’t seen you around before.” The girl was stirring milk into her second coffee as she responded, “Yeah, I am. I just moved here with my um- my daughter, closer to her dad so…” 

Since it was of course the time most adults got horrified, thought she was a bad kid, and though she didn’t get that vibe from Lorelei, it was at least bound to shock her. “You’re daughter? How old are you? Wait- I know, it’s on your resume. I mean- I’m, deja vu y’know? Abba did say ‘the history books on the shelf are always repeating themselves’.” 

She must have seen the confused look on the young girl and explained, “I had my daughter when I was sixteen.. And came here to get a job, so just getting major deja vu. Well then, since I know what you’re going through, I won’t put you through the short mental torture of waiting for a call I was gonna do and just tell you you got the job.” “Oh, thank you! I really need this, I can’t thank you enough.” “Just change her name to Lorelei and we’ll call it even.” “deal.” Those two would get along great, much to Luke’s misfortune.

-

Y/n sat at the counter with Caroline in front of her sitting on the counter while she played with her mother’s hair. Jess was filling up cups of coffee and serving customers while he listened to Y/n’s words.

“So until you go back to school, you’ll have Caroline during the day here and when I’m done work I’ll take her.” “No, you’ll never have a break. After work you go to your house, relax then grab her after dinner.” 

Jess may have this ‘I only care about myself’ attitude but that never included Caroline and Y/n, he’d kill for either of them at any given moment. He always put them first. If thought Y/n needed a break, she was getting a break whether she wanted it or not. 

Just as the girl was going to thank him she was interrupted by another girl around their age coming to sit down at the counter, two over from her. 

“I have the book you lent me.” She said, unknowingly interrupting the conversation since Jess was facing the coffee machine to make a new batch when she sat down. “Oh, thanks.” He muttered, notably not turning to face her.

On the inside Jess felt guilty. Why did he feel guilty? He didn’t do anything, he and Y/n weren’t together, nevermind the fact that all he did was lend Rory a book. As friends. Because they’re friends. But nonetheless it almost felt like cheating. Jess and Y/n may not be together officially but that didn’t mean that they both didn’t love each other. And not just because they were the parents to a beautiful little girl. Jess had always wanted more, he’d let the girl know that more than a handful of times, and she let him know it wasn’t unrequited, yet something always came between them.

You’d think having a baby together would bring them closer, and in some ways it did; they trusted each other more. But they also fought more and being the dumb teenagers they were, they didn’t have the emotional ability to move past that and build the relationship they both wanted. And then when they felt they were ready to, Jess was sent to live with his uncle. Just another fork in the road. But now they were living in the same town and had a good system, and people to support them. It was the perfect time, everything was going right, they could feel all the feelings that never really left resurfacing.

“Okay, I have to get to work. You’ve got her?” “Yeah.” “Bye, baby, I love you. I’ll see you in a little bit, but you get to spend all day with daddy.” “Bye-bye, mommy!” 

She said bye to Jess after she walked around the counter and handed him Caroline, muttering a small ‘go see, daddy’ that Rory most definitely heard.

When the door finally chimed shut Rory shot up to follow Jess to the table he was now setting Caroline up at. She watched his gentle movements as he readjusts her shirt and places crayons and paper in front of her, which she got right into scriballing away. 

“She’s yours?” “Yeah.” “.. So that girl is your girlfri-" "I’ve got work to do.” 

-

The warm atmosphere of the dinner is a stark contrast to the cold winter air. Noticing Jess and Caroline are nowhere to be seen she assumes they were upstairs and makes her way up the stairs. Half-way up the flight of stairs she could hear her little girl’s loud giggles. She quietly opens the door to see Jess holding Caroline above his head, as if she was flying.

When she first got pregnant everyone told her Jess wouldn’t be a good dad, that she can’t rely on him for anything. God were they wrong. She doesn’t think it’s possible for her baby to have a better person as a dad. She sadly doesn’t get to watch the scene for much longer as she’s spotted by little Caroline.

“Mommy! I see daddy ‘morrow?” “Yes, you get to be with daddy all day tomorrow too.” “Yay!”

As the conversation between them goes on, Jess lets his little girl plant her feet back on the ground and starts collecting some things she’ll need during the night before she comes back here tomorrow, he then starts getting Caroline’s shoes on her feet. While Y/n sits on the couch next to their little girl.

“So who was that girl this morning?” “Who?” 

Jess always did this, it was a tell tale sign that he didn’t want to talk about it, but that’s never stopped Y/n before. “You know who.” Of course having to be difficult, Jess gives her a fake confused look, as if he’s never met another girl in his life. 

“The one returning your book.” “Oh, that girl.” “Yeah, that girl.” “She’s nobody.” “So you just lend books to ‘nobody’s now?” “Care, where’s Mr.Wiggle?” The girl lets out a gasp and reaches out for Jess to help her off the couch, when he does she runs into the closet where she previously hid while playing hide and seek a couple hours earlier. 

“What? Don’t want Care to hear about her new step-mom?” “Don’t call her that.” “What? Care? Only you can call her that?” “No, don’t call Rory Care’s ‘step-mom’.” “Rory! I get her name!” 

Jess was a quiet guy, but not this quiet, especially not with Y/n. He didn’t want to talk about Rory, maybe because it was weird talking about another girl with your baby momma. And yes it was weird for Y/n too, but for a completely different reason, she assumes. She liked Jess, and has since before she even knew about Caroline.

“C’mon, Jess, it’s me. I want you to be happy.” Sure Rory made him happy, but only because she was the only friend he had here, it wasn’t the way Y/n made him happy. Before he could deny for words again Caroline came back running into the room with her stuffie in her hands. Having already said her goodbyes, she opened the door and walked out.

“Caroline, wait hun! I think you should go for it Jess.”

She walked out the door, closing it behind her, leaving Jess to stare at where she disappeared. He decided to take her advice, just maybe not the way she meant it

-

Y/n helped Caroline pack more snow onto their snowman. Caroline wanted to do it after she heard Luke complaining about town events again, he stopped complaining when he saw how excited the girl was. They had Mr.Wiggles off the side learning against the tree, using him as a reference. 

“Mommy, no. Mr.Wiggles has more hair.” 

Caroline was getting very comfortable ordering her mother around, but in this instance Y/n let it slide, poking more sticks on the top of the snowman’s head to mimic Mr.Wiggle’s spiky hair. 

“That’s good!”

Lorelei and Rory were just one snowman down, both told Caroline they thought she would win and encouraged her before she even started. Since they were so close, they could hear the scene that had just played out. 

“Tough age, wait till you get to the terrible twos. ‘No’ is all you’ll hear.” Lorelei said, kindly as her and her own daughter walked past them. Y/n let out a laugh at the comment before she asks, “You guys done already?” “No, but after Michelangelo over there busted out the power buffer, and when Caroline busts out her cuteness, what chance do we have?” “I see your point.” “So off to Luke’s we go.” “We’ll see you there in a bit.”

-

Y/n was standing talking to one of the decorators when she saw Lorelei and Sookie step out of the kitchen, quickly finishing her directions she wrote down a note on her clipboard then made her way to meet them at the entrance of the dining room.

When Sookie sees her, she asks, “What’re we looking at today?” Sookie was really fun to work with, like Lorelei she was very chill as a boss, but Sookie was also so kind and always took it upon herself to make sure Y/n has eaten and that her and Caroline are taken care of. She could tell the woman was going to make an amazing mother.

“This is last on the list.” She replied, after she took a quick glance at her clipboard, then continued, “We’ve got trumpets, the madrigal singers-” “Sorry to interrupt, but I’m not playing squire of Bracebridge.” 

Sookie and Lorelei must have finally told Jackson to play the squire, they told her earlier in the week that they were playing to ask at the last moments so he had to. It was a flawless plan, especially when Jackson can’t say no to Sookie.

She saw that Lorelei and Sookie were just ignoring him, so she played along and continued down her list, “All the servers are lined up. This is just for the recorder players and harpists.” She stopped at the recorder players and let Lorelei talk to them, “Hi. Lay some on us, guys.” 

The two recorder players played the soft tube they were going to come accustomed to in the next few days. The three of them shared positive looks and when their playing came to an end, Sookie said, “Hey, you cats really know how to blow those things.” Lorelei continued Sookie’s comment by saying, “You’ve got the gig. Y/n here will call you later with the details. Thanks.” 

Recorder players started packing their things, Jackson started again on the fact that he wouldn’t play the squire, and the three women continued to ignore him.

“When do the quests arrive?” “Thursday at four on their own jet.” “After buying out the whole inn.”

“Must be nice to have money.” Y/n added, checking off and writing down more notes on her clipboard.

“You know what struck me today?” “-Was it the fact that I am not the squire?-""We’re crazy for doing this.” “We’re beyond crazy.” It did feel crazy, Lorelei told her they’d never done a function this big before and that’s the reason they hired more help. Like her, but also that they were planning to do a lot more big things like this, more weddings, and such. 

“We’re ‘Anne Heche speaking her secret language to god and looking for the spaceship in Fresno’ kinda crazy.” “Oquinis no-goodo noto.” Sookie said, causing Y/n add, “Il ecnatra dos guidan.”

Their nonsense was once again interrupted by Jackson, “And spring this on me at the last minute too. I mean, that’s just manipulative.” Suddenly a cook pops his head out of the kitchen, saying calmly, “Sookie- fire!”

Sookie rolled her eyes softly, this happened far too often, before saying, “I gotta get back in the kitchen. You guys handle the harps?” Both women nodded and replied in unison, “You got it.” 

“Alright. I’ll do it. I’ll play squire Bracebridge if that’s what you want.” Everyone knew he would cave eventually. Sookie patted his arm and said a quick, “Thanks, sweetie.” before walking back into the kitchen to hopefully deal with the fire. “As long as it’s not just because I fit the costume.” Jackson looked back at Lorelei and Y/n, Lorelei had a grin on her face while Y/n wore a tight-lipped smile. “It’s because I fit the costume, isn’t it?” He followed after Sookie.

Lorelei put her arm around Y/n and led them to the harpist, “Go ahead.” The harpist played the same tune as the two recorder players. But just as the woman started, Lorelei got a call. She patted Y/n’s arm, “I have to take this, you handle the harpist.”

The girl tried to stay calm, nodding her head and going back to listening to the music. Lorelei trusted her, yes it wasn’t a big job by any means, but still it was a step into a bigger role down the line.

-

The next day, Sookie and Y/n had all the waiters/performers in the dining room going over what their job was. And teaching them the old English words to use for things.

Sookie was just telling Rune that he couldn’t just talk like an old man whe Lorelei came in with a disappointed look on her face, and let them know the dinner was off.

The three women, as well as Rory and Caroline were now sitting at a table at Luke’s, Caroline was happily eating her pancakes, plain just as she liked and completely unaware of the collective disappointment of the group.

Lorelei has really welcomed Y/n into her life. She may not be Jess’s biggest fan, but she would always help another teen mom out. Especially since she sees so much of herself in Y/n. She’s grown to really love the girl in the short time they’ve known each other. And aftering hearing Y/n didn’t have her family in her life she was more than happy to help and maybe become that family for her one day. Just like Mia did for her.

“I’ve got 30 pounds of aged beef, trays and trays of trout, mountains of prune tarts. I diced pumpkins until my hands turned orange. I’ve got pumpkin hands!” Sookie showed the table her hands, it apparently caught Caroline’s attention since she grabbed Sookie’s right hand and held it in her left while she continued eating. Sookie lets her hand rest in the little girl’s while she freaks out more and asks Lorelei, “How can you stay so calm?” “There’s nothing we can do about it.” 

Rory was just as upset, mostly because she knew how hard her mother worked on the planning, “I can’t believe they got snowed in.” Y/n hasn’t told Jess, but she’s become pretty close to Rory, the girl sometimes comes to the Inn and helps around and Rory’s become kinda her only friend, that was until Rory invited her to the record store with Lane. After that day she had two friends. 

After knowing Rory more, she realised how much she and Jess have in common, and even though Rory has a boyfriend she can tell there’s an attraction to Jess she’s trying so hard to hide. 

Y/n zoned out for a moment, looking outside, she was upset that the first event she helped organise wouldn’t even happen. She was broken from her stare out the window from Caroline jumping in place while sitting on her mom’s lap, the cause of which was Luke coming to the table. 

“You girls want anything besides coffee?” He asked, adding on with a pat on the girl’s head, “Or pancakes?” “Hey, what about Luke?” “What about him?” “He eats, and Jess eats. Doesn’t Jess eat?” Sookie directs the question at Y/n, before the girl could say anything Luke cuts her off, “What’s she doing?” “I think she’s inviting you for dinner.”

Getting distracted while trying to convince Luke to come to dinner, the four decide to still put on the dinner for the town. Like an out of control slumber-party.

-

The dinner was going great, the secret amazing part of inviting the town was that Y/n and Caroline could actually meet everyone. Miss. Patty and Babette loved Y/n and Caroline (mostly Caroline), Caroline loved Kirk, and everyone loved that Caroline could do whatever she wanted and Talor wouldn’t say anything. And Y/n got to meet Paris after all the stories she’s heard.

Caroline and Y/n were in line for the horse drawn carriage rides, when Caroline saw her favourite person, Lane. “Laney! I ride with you!” Lane, before agreeing, made eye contact with Y/n to make sure it was okay. Y/n gave them the go ahead and helped Caroline get settled. After their carriage left she made her way to the next one. Telling the driver it’s just her.

It was nice to get a break from everything. It was quiet and peaceful. Well that was until Jess ran up and hopped on the carriage next to her. Without a word he put the blanket that was over the girl’s legs on his too. 

“I thought you and Care were going together.” “She’s one ahead, with Lane.” “Ahhh. Well it’s two to a sleigh no more, no less. So you were breaking the rules, you're welcome for saving you.” “You could have hurt yourself.” “Aw, you care about me.” “You are my baby's father.” 

She wished she just agreed with him. She didn’t just care for him because he was Caroline’s dad, and she doesn’t think she says it enough. But then again, maybe it would mess things up if she admitted that. But that decision was made for her.

“I’m touched.” “Jess. I don’t mean it like that. I care about you, Caroline or not.” 

Trying to change the topic to something she thought was more lighthearted, she says, “So, how are things with Rory?” “There are no things with Rory.” “C’mon, Jess, we can talk about this stuff-” “Why are you so insistent that I date Rory?” 

She wasn’t expecting that outburst. Not from Jess. He rarely ever yelled at her, and when he did it was always misplaced anger, never actually angry at her. This time it was her, it was what she said.

“I just want you to be happy-” “C’mon, Y/n. Be serious.” “I am. I want-” “If you want me to be happy so bad, why won’t you give me a chance?!” 

He turned his face to her, looking right into her eyes, she could see the hurt in his. Did she put it there?

“What’re you-” “Since we found out about Caroline, I’ve tried and tried to help you realise that I love you. And not how you mean ‘I love you’. I don’t love and care for you because we have a family and I have to. I love you, because I want to. I want to be with you. And I know it will be hard, but I’ll do the work.” 

If she had more social awareness at the pent she would have hated that the coachman heard all of that. But after what Jess said, the look in his eyes; that was so full of love. She felt like it was just them two in the world. No, that it was just their little family in the whole world. He and Caroline were all she would ever need.

“I love you too, Jess. I have for so long, long before Caroline, but I thought you wouldn’t want to be tied down to me, especially after I had Caroline, that any sign I thought you gave me was all in my head.” “It’s not.” 

He brought her in closer to him, an arm around her shoulders and when her arms wrapped around his waist he left a kiss on the crown of her head. The small kiss brought her eyes up to him, which led to their first real kiss in one year and nine months. 

His lips were softer than she remembered, but they still fit into hers as if they never left.

She broke away from their reuniting kiss to place her head in the crook of his neck, wanting nothing more than to be close to him.

“My mom didn’t want me to come home.” She took her head out of his neck to look at him fully. They were always that person for each other, the one you can tell your problem to and they knew when to help and when listening was enough. Right now, she knew listening was enough.

“I’m sorry, Jess.” “It’s fine. Just sucks.” “I know. Well, Care and I will always want you to come home.” After her words, he brought her closer than before. She was always just what he needed. 

Wanting to change the subject, Jess nodded his head to the snowman Y/n and Caroline built. “It’s good.” “What?” “Your snowman, well Caroline’s snowman I'm sure she’d want me to say.” “You know which one’s ours?” “Definitely shows her personality… It kinda looks like Mr.Wiggles.” “That’s what we were going for. But everyone thinks the one on the end is going to win.” “Really? It’s so overdone.” “I agree.” “You and Care’s should win.” “Agree again.”

-

The dinner was filled with Jess and Luke confused at what exactly was in the food, Jess and Y/n trying their best to keep Caroline sat which about half an hour in they gave up and just let her walk around the lobby, as well as saying hello and talking to everyone at the table. Having an interesting conversation with Mrs.Kim about grace, ‘helping’ Kirk by sitting on his rolling food cart, and even talking with Paris for a while. 

Overall it was a great night. Even better when Jess, Y/n, and Caroline got to their shared room, putting Caroline asleep together for the first time in a while. And falling to sleep in the same bed together, holding each other, listening to each other’s breaths, as well as Caroline’s. Everything was just how they both always secretly wanted. And now get to have openly and freely. 

- 

In the morning Y/n got up early since she was technically working, and she still was when Luke, Jess, and Caroline left to open the diner for the day. It was around noon when Y/n finally left, walking to Luke’s to spend the day with her two favourite people. Which was when she saw Michelangelo’s snowman fallen to a large pile of snow on the ground.

She didn’t even have to think for a second to know that Jess did it. Sometimes he did the weirdest things to show his love.

The bell rang as she pushed open the door, she sat down next to Caroline, saying ‘good morning’ and getting one back before she made her way to the counter.

“I saw what you did.” “What’d I do?” “Caroline will be happy she won.” “Anything if my girl’s win.”

[thebibliosphere]

Hey! I know that this isn't something you struggle with but since a lot of your other followers are disabled as well, it would mean a lot to me if you could publish this ask since I'd like to see if anyone else experiences anything similar to what I'm going through. I'm not asking for anyone to armchair diagnose me, I'd just appreciate not feeling so alone and scared and confused. My general physician is claiming that my anxiety is causing the issues I'll describe but I call bullshit on that:

About two years ago, cca 4 months after my top surgery, my body stopped being able to process oil. Whenever I'd eat anything that was made with oil of any kind, I'd get cramps in the abdomen after a while and I'd get diarrhea. Caffeine started to do this also but in a smaller intensity. I had a hysterectomy a bit after that and they checked my kidneys and liver so I know that those are both ok and not the cause. I also got checked for Celiac since it runs in the family. Because the issue wasn't getting worse and my then general physician was always dismissive, I let it be. When I wasn't having diarrhea, I was constipated, though I did have a bowel movement like once or twice a week. Fast forward to now. In August, it suddenly got a lot worse. At first, even a single drop of oil would make me feel ill. Then, the time period got longer - currently the cramps and the pain last for 48 hours afterwards. I also became unable to digest animal fats, the only meat I can eat is lean chicken and fish. Afterwards, gluten became an issue (Celiac is still negative), and then nuts as well.

My new GP, even though she believes it to be anxiety, gave me Itopride, and it worked for about 3 weeks - I had no cramps, pain, exhaustion, gas or bloating after eating, and I had a bowel movement once a day. But it stopped working two days ago, again without a reason, and the effects started being less effective about a week ago. Even when taking the meds, I have a movement only once in about 8 days, and laxatives make me gassy but nothing happens. I'm also not sure about this, but it seems that chicken is no longer safe either.

I think it's important that if I don't take Itopride, I never even feel the urge to go, so when I say that I've always been constipated, I mean that I don't even feel the need to have a movement. Lately, when I take Itopride, I do get the urge that I do always get when taking it, but it's like I can't go, so I always feel full.

I just feel super scared and I have no idea what's going on. I admit that I have a history of eating disorders (in recovery since May) and I did abuse laxatives about a year ago, but I don't think it was enough to cause such serious issues? I used to take them like once a week and for about 3-4 months.

I'd really appreciate knowing if anyone has ever experienced anything similar or knows about anything like this because I feel like my life is in shambles - can't go outside for long because I might need the toilet suddenly, or I'm in too much pain to walk, I'm afraid to eat, I often feel repulsive, I don't know what might happen in a month, I am becoming incapable of taking care of myself and my flat because I'm just so goddamn tired.

Ooft, I’m sorry. It sounds like you’ll need a colonoscopy to figure this one out, so if you haven’t had one yet, really push for a referral.

Fwiw, I do experience something like this, but it’s from mast cell inflammation in my GI tract. The doc prescribed me bentyl for when things flare up but I’m also on a fiber supplement (citrucel. It’s a lot gentler than other types) to try and keep that from happening. Also if you’re low on b vitamins, your stomach sometimes stops digesting food, so maybe also ask about getting your levels checked. Taking an additional b2 supplement means I can process fats and oils again which I couldn’t before.

I’m not saying this to be like “this is what you have” just throwing them out there as suggestions that might help you piece together what might be wrong.

I hope you get more helpful comments in the notes 💖

[jongbross]

Hiiiiiiii 👋

Can you write a Baekhyun fic? I'm not exactly sure what I want, but... While listening to Demi Lovato's song, something came to mind...

But you make me wanna act like a girl

Paint my nails and wear high heels

Yes, you make me so nervous that I just can't hold your hand

I don't like school fics so maybe a best friend au.

She and Baekhyun are best friends, and the reader thinks she's far from his ideal type. She's been in love with him for years but she's insecure and either Baekhyun is too blind to see her feelings or the reader is a good actor.

She's a great girl, but she struggles to see her own potential... Baekhyun is everything to her, and she to him. Baekhyun had noticed her jealous behavior for a while and became suspicious. He even caught her crying once. When he put the pieces together, he understood everything. After faced her, the reader tried to run away from him, but Baek was fast enough to catch her immediately.

pairing: byun baekhyun x reader word count: 1256 genre: fluffy but also angst? warnings: swearing, jealousy, reader getting on beakhyun's nerves a/n: i'm back at writing requests!! thank you so much for your patience, i hope you enjoy this <3

"i think she's flirting with you", you told baekhyun, looking at the waitress that just walked by the two of you and shot baekhyun the prettiest smile she could manage.

"she's not", he denied, not even bothering to look back. "she's working on christmas eve, so i bet she's just trying to get a nice tip."

it was a tradition, at this point. you and baekhyun had spent the last four christmas together, as a sign of how strong your bond with each other was - either it was at bucheon with his family, abroad with your family, or just the two of you, like that moment.

for this one, sick and tired of being single (in baekhyun's words), he decided to take you too for dinner on the night before christmas. 'i won't be able to go to bucheon this year, so we should have a date night, and then sulk and eat leftovers while we open our presents at my house the next day', he had said, a month previous.

and of course you accepted. not only was baekhyun your best friend, but also the one you loved; like, actually loved.

there wasn't much you could do about it, to be honest. baekhyun had always seen you as a sibling, and that alone was enough to end any hope you could possibly have. on top of that, came the fact that he was just so... ethereal; baekhyun was the definition of a keeper, and any person who could have him was literally the luckiest person in the entire world.

"you can possibly think that every single person that smiles at you is just being polite, baek", you chuckled. "that's why you're single again..."

"does it bother you that i'm single?"

you tried your best not to choke on your drink as your brain screamed 'no, i actually love it' as an answer.

"i mean, i can call her over and ask her out...", he said, teasingly. "but you would spend christmas alone."

you just rolled your eyes at him, going back to your food and pretending like you weren't holding back a smile.

baekhyun kept the conversation going, as well. he told you about his family, how sad his mom was that she wouldn't see you that christmas; you told him about your plans for the next year, what you wanted to achieve.

cause, you see, talking to baekhyun was so easy, feeling seen was the biggest problem here. he could repeat every single word you had just said for the last hour, but could he see that you were wearing a new dress just for him? could he see that you got your nails done in his favorite color just for him? could he see that you were there, dying for him to love you back?

over your third glass of wine, the waitress came back to your table, the same pretty smile on her face.

"would the couple like to order some dessert?"

"we're not a couple", you instantly said, facing your glass.

taken aback by your answer, the waitress hesitated to turn to baekhyun, only to see him as surprised as her.

"um... no, not for now", he politely said. "can we get some water though, please?"

she hummed in response, before turning around to leave.

"wow, that was quite harsh", baekhyun faked a chuckle. "are you okay?"

"sure."

"are you really sure?"

"yes, baekhyun", you rolled you eyes. "she was just trying to check if you're single so she can keep flirting with you. all i did was give her the answer she was looking for."

baekhyun frowned, leaning into the table to take a good look at you.

"are you drunk already?", he laughed. "i mean, she just wondered if we were a couple, it's not that deep, y/n. we're together on christmas eve, it's-"

"no one would mistake us for a couple."

"what? why not?"

"because!", you exclaimed. at the corner of your eyes, you saw the said waitress coming again with a jar of water. she placed it on the table in front of baekhyun, and then proceeded to smile at him again before walking away. defeated, you sighed. "i am me, and you are you. nobody could ever think about us as a couple, so... i don't know, you can just give in and ask her out if you want to."

baekhyun scoffed at you, watching you as you took another big gulp from your wine. he silently took in your moves, the way you poured yourself some water and avoided his gaze.

"why are you jealous?", he finally asked after a minute or two of silence.

"i'm not jealous", you defended yourself.

"then look at me", baekhyun waited for you to finally look him in the eyes. "now tell me you're not jealous."

it was your turn to scoff, grabbing your glass of water and drinking a bit of it.

"this is stupid."

"yes, it is stupid", baekhyun agreed. "i think it's so stupid that even at christmas eve you won't admit why you're being jealous, that you'll only be petty and try to push me onto other girls. i don't want them."

you looked at him, damning him mentally for the way he was sitting at his chair, for the way his angry eyes made your heart flutter.

"i'm giving you the chance to be true to both of us, y/n. please, take it, and tell me why you are so jealous. i need to hear you say it."

"why?"

"because it's christmas eve, i'm at this beautiful restaurant with the most beautiful girl. you're wearing a new dress, wearing my favorite perfume, and you did your nails yesterday thinking about me, didn't you? don't think i didn't notice", he sighed, leaning into the table once again. "if we can't confess to each other right now, right here... then i truly don't think we ever will."

you kept staring at him, trying your hardest to keep your tears at bay so they wouldn't ruin your makeup. you felt like you were glowing, like your chest was now swallowing you deep into an ocean of something that you couldn't quite describe what it was, but if you had to take a shot, you would call it love.

"how long did you know?", you whispered to him.

"since your birthday", baekhyun replied. "but you're a good actress, i'll give you that."

you chuckled, shaking your head in disbelief.

"i'm sorry...", you told him. "i'm so sorry. i'm pathetic."

"yeah, kind of", baekhyun joked, making you both laugh. "i'm just kidding. you don't have to sorry, if anything i should be the one apologizing. i've known for so long now, but my pride didn't let me say shit. i just kept pushing away every girl that came around, and praying that you would do the same to anyone who got close to you, waiting for you to confess. everyday felt like i was gonna have a heart attack."

you rolled your eyes. "who's pathetic now?"

he laughed out loud, eyes turning into big heart emojis as you looked at him. just as you were ready to speak, the waitress came up again, smiling at baekhyun.

"do you guys need anything?", she asked.

"yeah, um... could you bring me some chocolate ice cream, please? and for my girl...", baekhyun looked at you. the waitress followed his gaze, smiling at you just the same and, maybe, baekhyun was right all along - she wasn't flirting. "anything she wants, please."

[vagueandominousvibes]

I came across one of those posts that's like "tell me in the tags the HCs for your blorbo's phone/car/device/etc" and started talking about the Knights' Lodge AU boys, only to realise it was getting so long I might as well make my own post about it.

Les aka. Blue

Blue's phone is one of those slabs that's only barely made the transition to touch screen. The screen itself is so cracked it would likely fall apart completely if it wasn't all held in place by a very dubious screen protector. Tiny shards occasionally fall off along the edge.

The brightness is turned down to 0, regardless of the actual brightness of his surroundings; he knows this phone so well he could use it blind. He's had it for years, and if anyone asks he'll shrug and say he's just not gotten around to getting a new one yet, but the truth is that it was a gift from his aunt. The background is of the two of them leaning against her motorcycle. He's in his teens and is wearing her patched leather jacket. They're eating ice cream and grinning from ear to ear.

His lock screen, however, is something really generic — like the most plain thing you can imagine. A solid colour maybe, or one of those stock photos of turquoise water washing up on a beach. His password has been the same 8-digit code since he was twelve. It's the day he came out to his aunt: he had a minor breakdown about it, and she took him out for really greasy fast-food; when they got back to hers, she put on this black-and-white version of Frankenstein that was so bad it was funny. Blue's aunt is long gone, but he still keeps a copy of that movie for when he's feeling rough.

Clancey aka. Red

Red gets a new phone every couple of years. It's not that he's careless with it — he really isn't — it just seems to be a magnet for accidents: it fell off the bathroom shelf, directly into the toilet, during an all-nighter in uni; it slipped out of his backpack when walking home from school once, and a bus drove over it; he accidentally dropped it on concrete and the screen shattered.

At this point it's a bit of a running joke in the family.

His current phone has a lovely maroon leather case with numerous little charms dangling from the top of the spine. Most are from various fan artists, though a couple are little pearl-chains his half-sisters made for him in pre-school. These two pearl-chains have moved from one phone to the next, and he's always made sure the case has somewhere to attach them.

Irvine aka. Green

On the outside, Green's may seem like a little bit of an Apple person. He didn't mean to become one, and he's got a proper gaming laptop, an Xbox, and a Switch, but his phone is an iPhone, he mostly uses a Mac, and he's got an iPad laying about somewhere. He's even got an Apple Watch.

In his twenty-some years of existence, he's never had to worry about being short of technological devices: Mr Irvine is very pleased to be able to provide his only child with the latest in technological development. All Green has to do is say the word, and it'll be his. Not that Green needs all of these things. He would much rather spend Christmas Day with his dad, instead of opening yet another thing alone in front of the white Christmas tree with glitter and fairy lights pre-installed.

The thing is, Green doesn't really know his dad — and Mr Irvine doesn't really know his son. Mr Irvine wants to make sure Green is provided for, and Green is grateful for the sentiment. He keeps every single thing his dad has ever given him, because he would feel exceedingly guilty throwing any of them away.

Which is why he's never going to tell his dad that his favourite device is a small grey-and-white mini-MP3 player from 2005, that runs on batteries, has no Bluetooth options, and stores some 150–200 songs.

Dunn aka. Shadow

Much like Blue, Shadow's phone is old and cracked. Unlike Blue, Shadow would love to get a new one, he just can't afford it. The SIM-card is one of those cheap top-up ones with ridiculously expensive data. He keeps it in his coat pocket for emergencies (and to take blurry photos of his and Vio's cat), but otherwise uses Vio's phone if he has to make a call.

Not that Shadow has a lot of calls to make, outside of the occasional GP appointment when necessary, or the optician every couple of years to get his eyes checked and get a fresh batch of contact lenses, but he generally prefers dropping by in person.

Does Shadow feel insecure about the state of his phone? He'll laugh the question off, but feel viscerally that yes, he really is. He keeps trying to save up, but for one reason or another he never gets there. Usually it's because of his mum — she barely recognises him these days, but he still likes to get her nice gifts, and if that comes at the cost of a new phone, what is there to do? He just wants her to be happy.

Cor aka. Vio

Vio accepted a long time ago that 'my phone' really meant 'our phone'. If he really wanted to, he could probably make up a reason as to why he would need his job to provide a work phone, but honestly, he spends more than enough time staring at screens as it is, and when he goes home he's off and doesn't want to be pestered with texts or emails that can wait till the morning.

So he has one phone, and he's perfectly happy to share it with Shadow. It's really quite enjoyable to curl up on the sofa with Shadow after dinner, to play yet another iteration of Scrabble, Word Search, or Sudoku together.

It must also be said that the background — their hands intertwined, silver rings glittering in candle light — still makes his insides flutter warmly, especially when he looks up and catches Shadow admiring the ring Vio had spent so long choosing.

[annebelle93]

Oi meus horrores! I’m sorry for the one year absence, life’s been hectic in 2022 Brazil. But I thought I might brake the fast with a little fun headcannon as I go through the requests and write then! Thank you so much for the mutuals that came to my private messages to check on me in the long year, you guys are AMAZING! Without further ado

Things my family said with top “The Brothers energy”: Spouse edition!

• Lucifer

Text with a silly selfie while spouse at work: “guess who’ll be half naked eating pizza in bed now” Reply: “For the love of God, please let join you” “Love of god? I thought you were against God” Reply: “listen very carefully because I’ll only say this once, if it means being with half naked you, I am willing to swallow my pride and ask assistance from a vengeful inhuman entity of my dislike.”

• Mammon

Spouse, who is a computer engineer, playing on on-line cassino for fun, after lecturing me not to do it because it is made to make you lose money. “Didn’t you say this Is made to F you up?” Spouse roll eyes and smile confidently. “Maybe you, I’m build different” Loses ridiculously small amount of money. “Welp” throws phone away “time for onlyfans, I guess” “Oh, so you lose money gambling and now I have to sell feet pics?” Looks at me really confused. “What? No, why’d I be sharing your glory with the world? No, I’m doing onlyfans, you’re taking the pictures”

• Levi

Me distracted going through the phone waiting for the pump to fill the gas. “Amor, have you decided yet the song you’ll use in the wedding?” Spouse begins to fidget, look slightly insecure. “I kind of thought of one, but I’m not sure you’ll approve it” remains silent “Go on” “Before you say no, keep an open mind, please! It is a very important song for me, from my childhood, and if you’re willing to pay attention to the lyrics, you’ll see it’s very pretty too!” Plays ‘Dragon Ball Z’ opening song on radio, apprehensive. (The Brazilian version is indeed very well translated and is, overall, a really nice song). “Make sure to write it down, so I won’t forget when talking to the musician” goes back to the phone. “Is that ok with you? You won’t say no?” “Wouldn’t I be a hypocrite if I did? I want to use ‘Howl’s moving castle’, which is a movie, but technically an anime too” Proceeds to hold both my hands with a teary look. “I’m literally building a shrine for you in my closed when I get home”

• Satan

Spouse laying on the floor playing with my cats, trying to lure the calico one (who is very apprehensive of humans) out. “Here, Fionna! Come play with daddy!” “Excuse me, ‘daddy’? These cats are mine, you’re step dad AT MOST” “Babe, love, light of my life” gets up, holding my hands with a fake smile “the moment you said ‘yes’ to me, you are sharing half of your life with me, that includes the cats” “No, but…” “That includes the cats” looks deep into the eyes, with a determined expression “and make no mistake, I am willing to battle you in court for them. I wouldn’t like to, but I am willing to.” Looks at spouse silently “it would be a bloodbath and you know”

• Asmo

Me in front of mirror trying to close a pair of jeans after returning home from carnaval (for those not familiar with Carnaval, it means that I basically spent a whole week walking all over Rio feeding exclusively of fast food and alcohol from 7am to 9 pm, EXCLUSIVELY). “Amor, do you think I’ve put on weight?” “Hell yeah you did!” “Why do you sound so excited?” Replies without missing a single bit, “more ass for me to grab”

• Beel

“Let me just say how happy I am you decided to work out, amor!” Spouse says at lunch “Me too, I’m sleeping better and it’s definitely helping with the anxiety!” “Sure, that too” “Is it because I’m hotter?” “You’ve always been hot” serving a second plate “it because now you’re hungry all of the time and let me be the first one to tell you, your cooking is exquisite when you’re hungry! Also I’m very happy that you’re eating like a human being and not like a little bird”

• Belphie

4 am, me cleaning the bathroom in the middle of a insomnia crisis. Spouse gets up and looks very confused. “What are you doing?” “I don’t know, I’ve been feeling really hyper lately and sleeping kind of feels like a waste of time when I’m hyper.” “No!” Proceeds to grab my hand and drag me to the bed, with an angry expression “in this house we don’t say such heresies”

For those who haven’t seen it, I have a nephews edition right here! I hope you enjoy it!

[writergirl3]

4 Town General Headcanons; Pt. 2

I really liked writing the first round of general hcs, so here are some more 🧡

Robaire;

As well as French, he speaks Spanish and a bit of Italian. All the romantic languages are pretty on brand for him, let’s be honest.

He’s visited every continent. His Dad traveled a lot for work when Robaire was a kid, and the boy was lucky enough to accompany him on some of his trips.

Surprise surprise, his favourite food is anything French. Particularly ratatouille. He always makes time for a proper breakfast in the morning and will munch on a baguette pretty much all day, no matter where he is. T always makes fun of him for eating bread that looks like a…well, y’know.

He used to wear brown contacts. While he embraces his hazel/green eyes now, he used to think they made him look too different. A kid at school once called him an alien and after that he begged his parents for coloured contacts. 

He loves Stevie Wonder. Like, adores the man. When he’s at home, he always has his music playing on vinyl. He got to meet him in 4 Town’s early days and let me tell you, the guy cried for like three days straight.

The guys are convinced that Robaire is immune to the cold. You’ll never see him wear a pair of gloves, and the poorly-circulated Jesse is so bitter about Ro’s ability to stay warm no matter what.

Jesse;

Jesse’s a really strong swimmer. One time when Tae went too deep in the sea when snorkeling and started freaking out, Jesse had him out of there in no time.

He always, always makes the guys handmade birthday cards. It’s become a tradition and the boys lowkey look forward to the card more than the gift.

He needs glasses and hates it. What’s worse is that he’s freaked out by putting anything near his eye so contacts are a struggle. The only one who can help him is Z, who has mastered the art of distracting Jesse and then dropping the contact on his eye before he can freak out.

He's super protective over his younger sisters and gave all the guys a serious talking to. Even if they find his sisters cute, none of the guys are willing to risk Jesse's wrath.

He pierced his own ear and then did the same for T. Was it a good idea? Maybe. Maybe not. Still, he felt pretty badass about it. 

Aaron T;

Loads of people headcanon T as a Spanish-speaker and all I can say is YES. He’ll babble away to himself in Spanish so fast that Robaire can’t even understand. If they wanna prank the other boys, though, they’ll just start conversing in Spanish and piss them off. This gets on Z’s nerves, especially. T speaks Italian too, but just prefers Spanish more.

He’s left-handed and has tried to teach himself to write with his right hand. Because he’s a dumbass, he’s also determined to successfully write with his feet. Don’t ask me why.

This guy gets through like two cellphones a year. Thankfully, being a member of 4 Town means he can afford all the little mishaps. One of them included running over his own phone with Jesse’s minivan. The less said about it, the better.

He used to straighten his curls when he first joined 4 Town. Straight hair was, and still is, in, so he felt kinda pressured. He soon got bored of sitting with Jesse’s straighteners for more than five minutes, though, and everyone loves his curls, anyway.

Aaron Z;

I mentioned this before, but he hates alcohol. Fully despises it. As if the taste weren’t bad enough, he’s freaked out by the idea that a little too much of the stuff could turn him into another person. He feels the same about drugs, and is resistant to even taking painkillers for the same reason. 

Robaire persuaded Z to try twisting his hair. Z thought they’d get in the way when he was playing sports, and he’d always kept his hair short and natural for that reason. When Robaire didn’t stop nagging him, he tried them, and secretly thinks he looks better with them than he did before.

Although Z is pretty much always seen wearing athletic gear, he’s simple with his style otherwise. He likes wearing simple tops and pants, although you’ll rarely see him in long sleeves. He’s warm-blooded and overheats really easily, and once spent Christmas Day in a pair of shorts.

We all know that Z looks intimidating and can come off as judgemental, but he’s super sentimental. Even more so than Tae and Robaire. While his face gives nothing away, his heart could be bursting with love inside.

In that same vein, Z is a really good writer. He fumbles over his words when he speaks, but becomes someone else when he writes. It’s like a window into his mind.

Tae Young;

Tae is a foodie, and he desperately wants to learn how to bake. He just can’t do it, though. Z tried to give him some lessons, but it ended in a shouting match (don’t worry, they made up after). Tae just has no time for instructions. Seriously, T probably has better focus in this department. Just leave Tae to ice some cupcakes or something and he’ll be happy enough.

He goes back to South Korea at least once a year to see his grandparents. He was super close to them when he was growing up and always showers them with gifts when he sees them now.

Tae's a big advocate of body positivity. He was a little chubby as a kid and found weight-related stuff difficult because of it. He's always telling 4Townies that they're beautiful no matter their size. The guys have learnt a lot from him, and the Aarons in particular have so much respect for Tae's passion.

He’s even more of a neat freak than Robaire, which is saying something. Tae loves T, but will whoop his ass if the brunette touches a single thing in his bedroom. He likes things a certain way, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

---

Musing Meaninglessly Masterlist

[meadowmines]

OC-Tober Day 28: Disease

[playing a little fast and loose with the prompt for the sake of a funny Majima headcanon]

"Awright. Left to right we got: New York style, Philly style, and recipe-stolen-from-the-chain-that-fired-me style."

"Um--" Nishida looks a little concerned about that last one. And hungry. But also concerned. "That's... that's not going to get you in trouble, is it? I mean, they probably won't find out, but..."

"It's fine." Aoyagi waves a hand. "The odds of 'em findin' out are slim to none, and even if they do the odds of 'em decidin' it's a big enough deal to sic Legal on an independent cafe across the Pacific are even slimmer. And besides..." He snorts out a laugh. "I made that shit ten times a shift for like five years before they took me outta the kitchen n' put me in an office. Was I just s'posed to forget how?"

That gets a good hearty cackle out of the boss, but he's eyeing those three slices of strawberry cheesecake like he's about half a second away from just cramming all of them into his mouth at once so Aoyagi figures he better get this show on the road. "Okay. Same rules as always. I want real feedback so I know which one of these to put on the menu. Don't just tell me 'it's good,' that don't tell me shit. I know it's good. I wanna know which one ya think is best of the three and WHY ya think so. Taste, texture, all that shit. We clear?"

"We're clear!" Nishida says.

"Crystal," the boss says. He's not quite drooling on Aoyagi's table but he's sure heading that way.

Aoyagi hands them their forks. "Get to work, then."

This is a thing they do. Aoyagi gets a wild hair to try some new recipes. He needs guinea pigs to test them on. Nishida and the boss happily throw themselves onto whatever culinary grenade he comes up with. Now, Aoyagi has done his due diligence in asking his two favorite test subjects about any dietary restrictions they might have and they have both assured him that they are on strict see-food diets. They see food, they eat it. No issues.

Let's put a pin in that.

The consensus on the New York style is that it's got a nice texture and that little extra tang from the sour cream goes well with the strawberry topping. The Philly style, they both say, is maybe a little too sweet for this particular topping but might be better plain or with something different on top of it. Unsurprisingly, the Cafe Gateaux ripoff copycat wins on texture but it takes another two slices of each for Nishida and the boss to pick a winner on flavor and the boss has to flip a coin.

Now, at some point around the midpoint of that tiebreaker slice, Aoyagi notices the boss sounding a little stuffy. Which is not too surprising. It's pollen season, after all, and a lot of people are getting a little stuffy right now. But once he's voiced his opinion about which cheesecake deserves a spot on the menu, he sits back with this big grin on his face and, as he so often does, says something that on its face makes no fucking sense whatsoever:

"Man, I fuckin' love strawberries," he says. "They're like nature's Pop Rocks."

Okay.

At least a few times a week, Aoyagi and Nishida will do this thing, this thing like they're having a very specific conversation with nothing but their facial expressions, and that conversation goes a little something like:

Aoyagi: what the fuck is he talking about now?

Nishida: I don't know and at this point I'm afraid to ask.

Aoyagi clears his throat. "Pop... Rocks?" he echoes, already knowing he's going to wish he hadn't. "Explain?"

The boss looks at him like he's growing an ear right in the middle of his forehead. "Y'know, them little fizzy shits that pop in yer mouth?"

"Okay, but..." Nishida slowly puts his fork down. "How are strawberries like that?"

"What, yer ears need cleaned?" The boss just glares at him. "Little fizzy shits that pop in yer mouth."

"But strawberries aren't fizzy," Nishida says, shrinking back like he half expects to get smacked for it.

"Oh, they ain't?" The boss does not smack Nishida but leans way into his personal space like a warning that smacking is next on the agenda. "Okay, smart guy. If strawberries ain't fizzy, how come they make yer mouth all tingly when ya eat 'em?"

"They don't--" Aoyagi says, and then the penny drops and he claps a hand over his mouth. Fizzy. Tingly. Stuffy.

And he and Nishida have that other silent conversation they have at least a few times a week:

Aoyagi: are you gonna tell him or do I have to?

Nishida: he's less likely to punch you for it so...

"Sir," Aoyagi starts, ever so casually reaching across the table with intent to pull that remaining half slice of strawberry cheesecake away from the boss without him noticing, "have you, uh... ever been tested for food allergies? No reason."

---

A couple days later, the boss takes off with some mumbled half-explanation about an "appointment." He comes back from that appointment with nothing to say about it.

"So," he finally says an hour or so later, when it's just him and Aoyagi and Nishida, like he's about to comment on the weather or some shit. "Plot twist: I'm allergic to strawberries."

Nishida just drops his head onto the table with a soft thunk. Aoyagi ponders whether this counts towards a free I told you so and decides that it probably doesn't since it didn't end in the emergency room.

"Bummer," he says instead.

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

Hi i just need to put this into words and possibly get an outside perspective that isnt from my friends and such

I dont know if i can call what i went through as a teen neglect.

This is pretty long sorry, just skip to the end if necessary

TW: Alcoholism, Neglect? Sorry if i missed anything

To explain fully, i was taken out of school in 7th grade due to mental health issues and one very abusive and ableist teacher. That left me alone at home for 80% of the week, which was fine i had plenty of food and such to eat and i preferred being alone to recover from everything. I never went back even once i was "recovered"

But then when i was about 16, my mother's mental took a nosedive. She started having hospital level panic attacks. It wasnt that bad at first, cuz despite everything i still atleast had food and such for when she had to spent a day or maybe two at the hospital, which was rare. I could survive on my own with the limited help i got.

It sucked, my quality of life went from "meh could be better" to "okay uh we're surviving in decent comfort atleast?" In the span of a few months. But it wasnt the worse

Then the new year rolled over and it became worse. My mother took up drinking to cope and that spiralled fast

To the point her hospital visits became weekly almost daily, my life went from "okay i can life like this but i rather not" to "haha, im gonna end up in the hospital too-" in less then a month

I basically lived with my grandmother for a month and, she barely had any food there because they always went out to eat, food wasnt allow upstairs unless you were sick, beds felt worse then wood floors, and she didnt respect my issues

I was pushed aside, i didnt eat more then a mini bag of chips most nights because the only things to eat where expired, take out from places i didnt like, or things i literally cant eat either cuz textures or allergies.

When everything went back to almost normal, there was barely any food at home, i slept in my mother's closet because my old stalker tried breaking into my room while we were gone (also bugs overtook my room because the window was jammed for the rest of the time before we came home because of that) and my mother didnt want us to share her huge bed because i apparently violently slapped and kicked her awake till 3am when we tried (i didnt go to bed till 5am the one week when we tried, and she always woke up at 6am for her meds and such especially during this also we both slept on the very edges)

My mother would sleep all day, only waking up to take her meds and eat and stuff.

Dinner went from a "happens most of the week" thing to "you'll be luckly if you found a warm thing to make and eat"

Basically, i kinda starved often till things calmed down later in the year. I think a broke college student ate and slept better then me that year.

When i was 18 it happened again but i had a job so it wasnt as bad.

I dont blame her for like 40% of that hell, her and my father where going through the 5th messiest divorce of our closeish family has witnessed (tho it was actually kinda tame compared to the top 4 so idk the actual severity), and her mental health was already on decline for reasons that are not mine to tell

But like can i call what happened neglect?? It sounds like it but idk i actually can call it that.

Like yeah i starved most of my time as a 17 year old, slept in a cramped closet during said time, developed back issues cuz of that, was barely able to care for myself due to depression, was subjected to to smell of weed and the smoke from it often despite the fact it makes me extremely sick, was very suicidal, was told i was a burden and was making the situation worse cuz im autistic and was basically the new family afterthought

But like, does it really qualify as neglect and can i call it that if it is? Most adults i talked to at the time, even my old therapist said no because i was "17 and should already know how to care for myself on my own. And shouldnt take the words said in a probably drunken state to heart" but like there no way i could care for myself?? Atleast not without taking less then ideal options. Also that doesnt excuse the extremely hateful things yelled at me???

So im really conflicted here, was it neglect or am i just being overdramatic??? Every therapist ive been able to go to says im just being dramatic but my friends says im not so ????

Hi anon,

I'm so sorry about what you've been through. You can most certainly call these experiences neglect if that is a term you would like to use.

Neglect by definition is to fail to care for properly, and by legal definition it's "the failure of a parent or other person with responsibility, for the child to provide needed food, clothing, shelter, medical care, or supervision to." Not only were you not provided sufficient food, but it seems likely that your emotional needs may not have been taken care of either, with an unavailable mother and a disrespectful grandmother. It also sounds like you were not given adequate shelter and medical care, considering where you slept, the bug infestation, and how that affected your development. So yes, in many ways, your experience aligns with neglect.

I think it's important to remember that it's common for trauma survivors to feel like they're being dramatic when they validate the severity of their trauma, and that it makes sense to be in some level of disbelief that it's worse than you initially thought. Please know that you are valid as a trauma survivor, and remember to be patient and gentile with yourself as you explore what this means for you.

Ultimately, it may be helpful to work with a mental health professional such as a therapist, if you can access or afford it. A therapist, especially one who specialized in trauma, can mediate your healing journey and help you find ways to make sense of, process, and cope with your experiences.

If anyone has any comments or suggestions, feel free to add on. Otherwise, I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[megareader93-aka-composcreator]

I posted 1,220 times in 2022

That's 641 more posts than 2021!

37 posts created (3%)

1,183 posts reblogged (97%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@freeusemuses

@ofdarkestdesires

@tokufan400

@spongebobssquarepants

@delugedecade

I tagged 45 of my posts in 2022

#youtube - 7 posts

#kamen rider - 5 posts

#marvel - 3 posts

#update - 3 posts

#dnd - 3 posts

#peter parker - 3 posts

#genshin impact - 3 posts

#comics - 2 posts

#spider man - 2 posts

#aganation - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 83 characters

#and peripheral stuff that has happened around me made me extra sensitive to this ig

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Stuff like this makes me think that we should not try to adapt this in America. Just dub it. Or make more wise spread

8 notes - Posted January 14, 2022

#4

Amazing! Makes me want Kamen Rider Fighting game even more! Could be like Smash or even LOL. Though the timing of the Disney symbol made me scare of the idea of Disney trying to adapt Toku. That shit would not go well.

@tokufan400 @delugedecade

10 notes - Posted May 26, 2022

#3

I feel like mourning. @dragonkings444 can’t be found!

Stupid tumblr! Their side blog @worlds-of-degeneracy was already shadowbanned, and now this!

10 notes - Posted April 4, 2022

#2

Prayers for Genshin Sumeru Event- An event based on Ramadan and Eid! I think it would be amazing to have an entire 30 day event, complete with cinematics and cutscenes, based on the month of fasting. Think about it, special challenges where you can only eat food to heal and buff once at the beginning, or maybe even special foods that could only be acquired during Ramadan. Then a special event at the end to celebrate. Plus the story of Ramadan in Genshin would be great!

12 notes - Posted February 1, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Why Raven of the Inner Palace is Great

In watching this series, one scene that always amazes me is this small moment in Episode 3. We have three characters, the Raven Consort, the Flower Princess/Consort, and the Emperor himself. When the Flower Princess reveals she had a lover, there are no big reactions from the other characters! Most anime, even historical ones with the same tone and style as this one, would have big reactions or some sort of outburst of surprise from one of the characters.

Instead, the Raven Consort just looks to the Emperor, judging his reaction. And it's just her eyes moving! Not the entire head or even her whole face! Just the eyes!

And the Emperor does the same! Probably feeling her eyes on him, his eyes turn to her with a neutral look and everything else about him remains neutral. This is enough to tell the Raven Consort that he already knows about this. She responds by looking away, cleary processing this information. But once again, it's just the eyes.

Some might see this as lazy or minimalistic. Maybe that is a factor in why they did the scene like this. Even so, this is great! and it totally makes sense for these characters to have such subtle reactions! I prefer to see it as genius!

19 notes - Posted November 13, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[frogsandfries]

I have never experienced much attachment to the places I've lived. I've never gotten sad over leaving a city or neighborhood.

At least not while I was living in Wisconsin. Even in 2018, when I bounced from Oregon, when I'd never strayed much further from Wisconsin than just tippy toes over the state line to Illinois; then pretty quickly to Arizona.

I don't really miss either of those places, just that I'd give almost anything to really relish the Pacific coast beach sand beneath my feet, at least once.

I've had an incredibly hard time being back in Wisconsin after what was going to be five years in New Mexico. I miss everything. I miss the air traffic. I miss the mountains. I miss the sky. I miss the dry. Hell, I miss the gunshots in the middle of the night, the sounds of drag racing. I miss the food. I miss the giant blood clots in my nose, a combination of the dry, thin air and a blood vessel I busted horribly in middle school. Every time I walk fast through a grocery store, I'm reminded that I'm no longer home.

I'd never felt homesickness until this summer.

I felt so horribly homesick, I still suffer from derealization at points. Like, being in Wisconsin is so horrible, it can't possibly be the truth. It just can't be reality.

I don't know what to do about it. Every time I try to tell my sister just a little of it, she acts a little hurt that I don't find her house my home. I don't know if she's ever felt this way about a place. She's traveled to Spain and Italy; she lived in Poland for about a year for her job. She's been to maybe a little more of the US than I have. She says she doesn't want to live anywhere besides Wisconsin. She says she hates New Mexico, that it's dry and brown.

It's more than dry and brown. It's beautiful. It's so beautiful to me. The sunsets are breathtaking every day; and the few sunrises I saw made me wish I was a morning person. New Mexico is red and fuchsia and gold and tangerine and violet and lavender. New Mexico is tumble weeds and road runners and drag racing and hot air balloons.

Ever since I was really little, I fantasized about living in the mountains.

I've had a fascination with hot air balloons for a long, long time.

New Mexico was where I really learned and realized that I really could be completely independent, and I could have my own cats for the first time in my life and I could hold down a job and pay my own rent all by myself and never have to ask family or friends to help me with anything.

What if I die in some freak circumstance, here in Wisconsin, having never seen New Mexico again in my life? What if I just never get back into a situation where I can go back to my home?

My seasonal depression has been killing me: All summer, it rained constantly and now it's stopped raining, but I'm further up the globe than I have been in four years and the change to the amount of daylight adds up day after day. New Mexico was also very gentle on my seasonal depression, which, if that's not enough to make one fall in love with a place, I can't imagine much more. I'm still so freaking proud and pleased, last winter, I spent the least amount of time being depressed since my depression first began. And I'm paying for it with interest this year......

Worst of all, to compound it all, I was supposed to be here to help my sister with her mortgage, and simultaneously improve my savings. I'm not financially helping with her mortgage, and I'm not earning enough money to even get the basics for myself, never even mind saving.

On top of that, my cat is miserable and stressed out. She's in such a bad state, she's even hissing at her brother--you know, the one and only brother that she's always had and always lived with? She growls at me when I try to pick her up or if I hold her too long or touch her while she eats. We were going to brush her teeth today, but even with a handful of her scruff, she was still screaming and growling.

I'm not sure if it's just that she's reading me and how unhappy I am, or what, but she's just absolutely not adjusting and it's killing me. In fact, the opposite. She's getting more stressed and more unhappy, which is--to undersell--destroying me.

And perhaps lastly, I was telling my sister I'm thinking about getting a tent for my bed. I've also been thinking about giving up the bedroom and just condensing down to the office. But that's crazy talk. If I put the bed in the office, a) I'm just going to have to move it again if I ever actually work from home again and b) that room is going to get real small, real fast.

The biggest reason I've been thinking about moving fully into the office is: This bedroom is a lot of space to try to climate control. If I got a bed tent, I wouldn't have to worry about heating or cooling the whole room, or sleeping with my face exposed to the cold. In most cases, I probably wouldn't even need a heating blanket. But this is fucking absolutely wild, how cold it gets in here, and it's only October. I need a whole new wardrobe, and I'm sick to death at the thought of it because where the hell am I going to find some decent sweaters??

If I'd just fucking.....known how fucking miserable I'd be, trapped out here in the middle of fucking nowhere. At least Albuquerque isn't nowhere. The public transit system might be garbage, but it exists. And even in the dead of winter, all I needed was a sweater or two. My apartments all stayed warm enough.

I think I'm causing my cat to continue to be stressed out and unable to settle into her new home with her new neighbors......

[unrelaxing]

There are over 300 books in this house, not including the ones I download onto my kindle by the hundreds for flights or train rides that don't actually require that many books, yet I am COMPLETELY UNABLE to find my next book. I've already chosen my audiobook for the next work week, which Audible tells me I have until the 27th to listen to before it stops being free and becomes worth 1 credit. I had no interest in listening to it until I saw that, now it's top priority.

I'm ashamed but I'm getting the urge to buy new books. It's been at least a month. To alleviate guilt (and also because I am ... unwealthy), I'm going to go to the local Vinnies, which have books as cheap as .50 cents. I'm also thinking of going to the free Little Library in the city and taking a book from there, though I'm going to have to pick a book to give. I'm bad at that. I'm greedy about books in a way I don't feel greedy about anything else. Maybe because only books ever has a system like a 'give and take' honour system. Certainly can't imagine people doing that about mobile phones, or quilt covers. I would find the former easy, but the latter just as excruciating as with books.

I finished 3 books this week, one via audiobook. That's why I'm getting that (incorrect) feeling that I'm somehow running out. I also can't stand reading on my kindle lately, which happens every once in a while.

I'm journaling less digitally, lately, because I got a 365 day diary that I've been writing in diligently. The downside is that it doesn't have room for much navel-gazing, because you only get one page. I write using bullet points, and most of it is written like I expect to get retrograde amnesia and need to access insignificant events. One entry reads: "At around 9:36pm someone started knocking on the door - specifically on the glass part, with what seemed like something metal (like a key?)." I'm disappointed in myself because I wrote "around 9:36pm". That time is so specific and therefore there was no need to put 'around'. That was definitely the time someone knocked on the door. I definitely looked at my phone as I freaked out and took note of the exact time.

It's nice to write with a pen, and it's nice to do something daily that isn't washing my ass. But I'm also worried about my digital journalling, and the idea that not everything is in the same place. It's easy to transfer my tumblr posts onto my online journal, but not my physical journalling, and my neurosis is flaring up about it feeling cluttered to not have everything be in the same place. I don't want to stop, though. I'm building some good habits lately. Reading more, physically writing, tracking my food, intermittent fasting.

Funnily enough, I started all this two days after J's birthday. She was starting to change her life, because she'd turned 30. I'm 29. I thought to myself, it's never worked for me whenever I use a special occasion to change my life. I have New Years' Resolutions (capital letters) every year, and only achieve one or two, usually my reading goal and something else. The euphoria of being able to call something a new beginning gets my gears going, but once that feeling fades so does my desire to actually achieve my goals.

Maybe it'll be better for me to start on just any random day. My brain is as it normally is, my excitement for life the way it will be for the rest of year. I chose J's birthday because as much as I love her, that date has no significance to my desire to achieve anything.

It'll be a month in 3 days, and I'm trudging along. I eat 2/3 meals a day, not denying myself - just making sure to have my dinner early and not eat anything else after, no matter how much I'm craving chocolate. I've set an alarm at 8:30pm so I remember to journal. I don't always do it at that time, but it means it's on my mind for the rest of the night. I make sure to sleep before 12, so that I get at least 8 hours of sleep. I've made other small improvements in my life that somehow make me hopeful. Am I getting my life together, finally?

Did all it really take was following advise that's been on Nike logos since 1999?

I swear, if I finish this 365 day diary I'm writing a cheesy self help book and doing a Ted Talk.

[ledenews]

Taylor Duplaga: Rebounding Her Hoops Career As a Cardinal

Covid this and Covid that. Eff Covid, right? Seems like that damn coronavirus ruined everything. Public school students in West Virginia lost a year of education, non-profit organizations were forced to cancel their most important fundraisers, addiction gripped the vulnerable tighter than ever before, and millions of loved ones were lost worldwide during the two-year pandemic. And Covid stopped Taylor Duplaga in her tracks, and she hasn’t been happy about it since she was removed from the court after two seasons at Fairmont State University. The guard appeared in 28 games for the Lady Falcons and averaged 4.6 points per game and collected 24 assists following a stellar high school career at Wheeling Central Catholic. But now Taylor, one of five children raised in Wheeling by Michael and Alyssa Duplaga, will finally have the chance to return to the hardwood. This time, though, she’s going to keep it local. Tomorrow afternoon at 2 p.m. inside Wheeling University’s McDonough Center, she will wear No. 25 as one of 18 Lady Cardinals playing for Head Coach Ann Kowalska against Edinboro. Wheeling was 14-15 overall and 12-10 in the Mountain East Conference and also will welcome Mercyhurst University on Saturday at 2 p.m. And yes, Taylor has something to prove, but not to you and not to anyone else ... except ... well, maybe ... you know her brother, Luke, right? Taylor's parents, Michael and Alyssa, have attended most of Taylor's games, and they will be in the stands tomorrow afternoon. Of all the sports you’ve played, which one is your favorite and why? I grew up playing soccer, hockey, softball, and basketball. However, once middle school rolled around, I narrowed it down to playing basketball because I knew already it was my favorite sport I played. I wanted to focus on the game of basketball because I had a goal I made for myself at a young age that I wanted to play in college. Basketball is a very fast-paced sport which is why I love it. It’s a sport where you can’t cheat the game. If you aren’t in the gym every day perfecting your shot or your dribbling, it will absolutely show in games or practices. The sport requires a lot of commitment and dedication. What are the best and worst parts about having four brothers? The best part of having four brothers is that I never had to deal with having to fight with a sibling over “who gets what” because at the end of the day, I was the only girl. So, to say the least, I was – and still am – my parent's favorite being the only girl (sorry brothers), but honestly I absolutely love having four brothers, and I wouldn’t wish to have it any other way. I believe they had a huge part in molding me into the tough woman I am today. For example, growing up with four brothers I wasn’t playing with Barbie dolls. Instead, I was outside in the yard playing tackle football with my brothers and their friends. I wouldn’t say anything is the worst part of having four brothers and I always would say, when people have asked, if I would have wanted just one sister, “Absolutely not.” I just know we would be complete opposites and I wouldn’t want to hear about “drama” all day and night.” Having four brothers makes things much more like, “Get over it, move on, no one cares about your sob story,” and growing up like has made me an all-around stronger person mentally and physically. Taylor’s brother, Luke, has always been her biggest fan. Explain your “secret weapon” on the basketball court. I would say my defense. I would rather hold a team’s best player to zero points than score 20 points. My energy also comes into play as a secret weapon because I play with very high energy and I believe when you bring energy good things happen. What is the one menu item at Generations that you eat most often? Why? Buffalo Chicken Wrap. You can’t go wrong with chicken inside a wrap, and on top of that, I’m a huge fan of “spicy” food. Oh, and you cannot forget about Generation’s homemade ranch on the side to dip the wrap in. It’s like the icing on top of a cake. Duplaga was a state champion hoopster for Wheeling Central Catholic High School. If you could say five words to everyone on Earth, what would those five words be? EVERYTHING happens for a reason. Read the full article

[ivanshogun]

A Friend's Trust Part (1/3)

“Yo dud, uhm.... you free today? Can we meet up.. I just need something :v”

My phone rang, seeing the message kinda surprised me. It's from a friend of mine, although we don't really talk that much, she's still the kind of friend that would talk to me on hours on end. I just can't ignore her or she might actually commit suicide, she's a sad and depressed girl. She's always been complaining about life, her lovelife specifically, she's getting ignored by her boyfriend. Well I'm just a friend to comfort her.

“Hmm I'm free so why not. Anyway what do you need? Your message is kinda sus”  I replied

“Lmao amogus, don't worry I just need something, I'm gonna tell you about It after meeting up”  I sighed as I read, I'll just go I guess.

She sent a picture, a picture of her and an emoji to block her face off,sitting on a Park bench, the place is quite familiar place, a park I once visited when I was a child. She sent Another message;

“I'll be waiting even if it'd take hours. Just be sure to go here :>” another photo were sent, this time a photo of her with nothing to block her face except that it's blurry, she's still at the same place. I don't to make her wait so I immediately took a bath. I'm nervous, I've never met any friend that I met online, I'm usually aloof and doesn't socialize that much irl. It took me roughly one hour to arrive at the place, surely she's still waiting. Walking around, I don't know if I'd find her, maybe its just a prank. “Hey!! ████!!” a girl waved her hand over the distance, wait is that really her? She's way more beautiful than the photos, well her photos were always blurred. Walking towards me, I can see her smile, she's quite cheerful than I expected. With her short skirt and a casual tops, it fits with her Petite body, oh hell what am I saying. “Shall we get going then?” she clinged to my arm, like we were someone close to each other, not to mention she already have a bf. “Hey hey, where are we going?” I asked. “Just go with me okay” she smiled while she holds my hand, her soft hand made me comfortable and I just followed her. We ended up on a Fast food chain, ordering food without my consent, well she's the one who paid. Is this some kind of date. She forced me to eat with her and not letting me leave. “So Shane what do you really need?” I asked as I sip down on a smoothie. She started to sob before she speaks, “My boyfriend dumped me” she cries as slams her cup on the table. So basically she just needed comfort, then why did I even had to meet up with her?

“After all those years, 8 fucking years of relationship and he would just end it all. I did everything I can, gave him gifts yet he didn't even gave me the love that I wanted, not even a single kiss or hug from him. He ignored me for 9 fucking months and he'd just show up and say that we're breaking up? Goddamnit, I thought he's going to be the one for me but I was wrong.” she cried out Loud, the other customers looked at us, they might misunderstood it that I made her cry. Pulling out my handkerchief to wipe her tears, I started to hug her, it's the best thing I could do as a friend. “Hey don't cry now, it's alright, you'll find another guy that'd suit your needs, that'll equally love you as much as you do.” I pat her head as she slowly  calmed down, ah fuck now my shirt is wet from her tears and snot. “Thank you,████” she sniffed for the last time. “Is your home nearby? I'm gonna take you home now” I said. “Yeah, it's near here” she said as she rubbed her eyes and held my hand. Walking down the street, she just won't let go of my hand. I bet she's really sad about everything. Dropping by at her house, I decided to leave. “Thank you for today, and please don't do anything to harm yourself, Shane” I said as I open the door. “Im gonna go home too, it's getting late” I added but before I could even exit the door, she hugged me from behind and stopped me. “Can you stay here for a little while” she said as she slowly starts to cry. “Okay, Alright. If that'd be good for you” I said as I pat her head. I closed the door as the sun slowly sets, it's just little while to comfort a friend of mine.

[shycoconutt]

I Need You (Kakashi x Reader Smut)

A/n: Oh boy do I got some smutty smut for you. This is my first time writing smut and I think I did okay! Please let me know what you think and, as always, feel free to send some requests my way! 🤍

Summary: You find yourself unbelievably horny waiting for Kakashi to get home from work. The night goes exactly as planned.

Word Count: 4200

Warnings: NSFW ( minors, there's the door -> 🚪), fem!reader, vaginal sex, rough sex, doggy style, cunnilingus

Gods, why am I so horny?

Sat in the reading chair in the corner of your and Kakashi’s bedroom, you find yourself unable to focus on the new novel you picked up at the bookstore this morning. Each time you try to focus on the words in front of you, your eyes start to drift off the page and fall on your bed across the room. The bed where Kakashi and you have had sex now maybe a dozen times. You two have been platonic partners for years, but it wasn’t until recently where you both allowed your feelings to blossom into romance. Some would say that your relationship with Kakashi came on fast, but those who say that don’t truly know either of you.

After the war, and after keeping your feelings for each other bottled down for years, Kakashi took you on a vacation to a quaint village on the outskirts of Konoha. During your stay, you two could finally relax and find comfort in each other. The future seemed less uncertain, and you allowed yourself to open up in ways you never had before. You both knew you loved each other, that you were meant for each other, but the stress of war and the lack of knowledge that either of you would come out alive prevented anything from happening. The last thing either of you wanted to do was take the other’s heart six feet under.

It was the third night on the trip when he proposed to you. Kakashi and you were naked together in the natural hot spring, embracing each other in the water. The words he spoke to you that night are etched in your brain, never to be forgotten.

“My whole life I’ve been fighting; fighting for Konoha, fighting for my team, fighting for our friends, fighting my demons, fighting the truth, and fighting the feelings I have for you. I never understood why it was so hard to escape you, but it isn’t until now where I finally understand. Loving you is the easiest thing I’ve ever had to do. Our love is so natural, so pure. It pains me to know that our reality has muddled it for so long. You are the best thing that’s ever come into my life, and the gods only know how thankful I am that you have been by my side through it all. Everything I’ve ever gone through, every challenge I’ve had to overcome, you’ve guided me along the way. I used to think I was undeserving of your love, but now that we both are standing here, bruised and battered by our past, I realize that it was always supposed to be this way. You and me. Forever.”

That was the night you and Kakashi shared your first kiss. The night you first held each other in a naked embrace. The night you touched the skin normally concealed under each other's clothes. The night you trailed kisses down his chest, to his stomach, his hip, and up his shaft. The night you grabbed him in your hand and stroked him while looking into his eyes. The night you felt his tongue draw across your nipples. The night you felt him suck and nibble at your neck. The night you felt his fingers, god his fingers, trace up your wet heat to rub onto your most sensitive spot. The night he held onto your hip and slid into your tenderness. The night you whispered sweet nothings in each other's ears while he pumped into you. The night you made love, four times.

It’s been a week since your mini-vacation of ultimate bliss. Immediately after arriving back to the village, you both moved out of your individual apartments and moved into the Hatake estate, per Kakashi’s request. When you asked him if this is truly what he wanted, he assured you that this was the place he wanted to make a home with you and your future children. He also liked that the estate is largely removed from the Hokage tower, where he will be spending the majority of his time in the future. Renovations are far from over, but your bedroom was the first area of the house to be set up. It’s your shared sanctuary, and to be completely honest, you’ve never felt more at home.

The only word to describe this week between you and Kakashi is passionate. Even with opposite schedules, you both make time for one another every day. You’ve been insanely busy at your new job that you acquired post-war, spearheading the mental health resource center for war veterans and shinobi still in active duty. Kakashi is busy shadowing Tsunade while she sorts out post-war rehabilitation plans for the village. This is your first day off and, unfortunately, Kakashi is out doing future Hokage duties. Though frustrating, both of you are super understanding of each other's roles in this village and you respect that time with each other may be limited in the coming years. That’s why any chance you get, you both check in on each other throughout your day. Whether it’s offering to take his ninken on a walk while he’s in the office, or him bringing you breakfast when you get to work, you find opportunities to be present in each other’s daily lives.

The evenings, however, are a whole other story. Both of you are usually home a little after eight, and you’ve adapted to having late dinners with each other. After cleaning up, the rest of the evening is spent wrapped up in each other. One thing you weren’t expecting about being with Kakashi is that he is constantly touching you when you are alone together. His hands are either on your thighs, wrapped in your hair, caressing your face, squeezing your arms, massaging your shoulders, touching your lips, or any other way he can get them on you. You crave his touch, so to say that you enjoy this side of him is an understatement. Not only does Kakashi adore touching you, he also adores being touched.

Touching leads to caressing, caressing leads to groping, and groping leads to passionate lovemaking.

Well, geez (y/n), maybe if you stopped daydreaming about Kakashi’s hands all over you then you wouldn’t be this goddamn horny.

Here’s the thing with you and Kakashi’s newfound sex life. You are in the early stages. All the sex you have is all about romance, making up for the lost time, and finally expressing your feelings with your body. It’s amazing and you wouldn’t change your lovemaking for the world.

But right now, you don’t desire lovemaking. You desire rough, animalistic, dirty, dirty sex.

The kind of sex that makes you shudder in desire and fear.

The kind of sex that makes in between your legs sore the next day.

Realizing you’ve been daydreaming for the past fifteen minutes, you close your novel shut and toss it aside. You look over at the clock on your nightstand to find that it’s almost time for Kakashi to be home. Usually, you would already be cooking something up for dinner, but you have a feeling that any food you make would just get cold. Eating is not your priority right now, Kakashi is.

A devious smile forms at your lips when you consider what you plan on doing with him when he walks through the front door. Should you take him right there? Get down on your knees and beg for him? Run a warm, candle-lit bath? Put whip cream on your tits and tell him that you’re his dinner? All great options, but none are really representative of how much you need him.

In one swift movement, you are up off your chair and running towards your closet. He could be here any minute and there’s no time to waste. Once there, you take in how disorganized your closet is. You have yet to unpack any of your clothes, as all you’ve worn the past week is your jonin uniform and your pajamas. Rummaging through the boxes sprawled out on the floor, you finally find which box you are looking for. The box looks like any other box, but written on the side in marker is the word intimates.

Bingo.

One might think you are a sex fiend with all the lingerie you own, but that is far from reality. The truth is, lingerie has always made you feel sexy. Most of all, it’s just so pretty. You love the power it gives you. You love the fact that no one knows that some days you are wearing the world’s skimpiest lingerie underneath your uniform. It’s like you have an edge on someone that they don't even realize. Also, when you did happen to end up in bed with a man, you were over-prepared. The look on their faces when you stripped off your clothes was priceless. It was your way of telling them that you expected them to want you.

There are way too many options to choose from, and you find yourself starting to panic as time passes on. You know you’re overthinking this as, honestly, Kakashi would love anything you put on. Some things you know about Kakashi are that his favorite color is blue, he loves your thighs and is obsessed with how soft your skin is. Therefore, you should obviously go for the baby blue lace and silk set. It includes a lace balconette bra, a thong connected to thigh garters, and a silk robe to go over the top. After putting it on and taking a look at yourself in the mirror, you knew you made the right choice.

Before finding a comfortable spot on the bed, you quickly grab some baby oil and rub it all over your body. The oil will allow Kakashi to slide his hands all over you effortlessly, which is exactly what you need. Satisfied, you grab your book and lay on top of your made bed. You weren’t planning on actually reading, but you think your casualness while wearing such a sexy outfit will have Kakashi’s head spinning.

So there you were, belly down, ass out, feet intertwined, book in hand, when you heard the lock click and the front door open. Perfect timing.

You could hear Kakashi kick off his shoes and take off his vest as he walked into your home. Usually, you would be standing in the kitchen where he would come and give you a warm embrace and kiss you until you told him that he has to eat dinner. But, you're not there, and you can sense his confusion.

“Where’s my babygirl?” Kakashi’s voice projects throughout the house, a hint of concern in his voice. You smile at the thought of the pout that’s probably on his face right now.

“Sorry sweetheart, I’ve been caught up in my new book. I’m in the bedroom,” you call back to him.

You hear what sounds like a sigh of relief as his footsteps make their way down your hallway in the direction of your bedroom, the sounds of pieces of his uniform dropping off of him every few steps. You make sure to keep your head turned to the door so you can take in his reaction to your state.

“Oh, the new book you got this morning? How is it? Let me guess, you already finished-”

An indescribable feeling shoots through your whole body as Kakashi enters your bedroom. He just finished pulling his mask down his face, as his hand is still caught to the fabric pooling around his neck. With a smile on your face, you soak in his expression as he’s stood in the entrance of your room, a deep blush forming on his cheeks and his mouth still agape in mid-sentence. His eyes dart back and forth from your face to the bottom of your ass that’s hanging out of your silk robe.

Damn, you really did that (y/n).

“What’s wrong, Kashi?” You say in the most innocent voice you can muster. You bat your eyelashes and flip over to sit up so he can get a good look at you. You let your book drop off the bed and land on the floor.

There’s another pause before Kakashi slowly walks towards you on the bed. Without speaking, he reaches a hand out to you. You take it and he pulls you up so you're kneeling on the bed as he stands in front of you. His dark eyes bore into yours as both of his hands drop to your thighs. Slowly, he grazes them up over your hips, your waist, up the sides of your breasts, to wrap around the back of your neck. You can feel the hairs on your skin stand in anticipation. With his hands still wrapped around you, he brings his head down to you and grazes his mouth on your jawline. From there he plants small kisses up the side of your face until he reaches your ear where he nibbles before speaking to you in a strained, low tone.

“You’re a very dangerous woman, (y/n).”

He must have felt you shudder because you could feel him smile against your cheek. Standing up straight again, Kakashi’s hands drop to the tie of your robe around your waist.

“May I?” he asks, giving you the sexiest look you’ve ever seen. Kakashi has been so effortlessly attractive since you met when you were young. Having these intimate moments with him almost seems surreal.

“Of course, Hatake,” you smile up at him.

Taking the tie in his hands, he starts to unravel the knot keeping your robe together. Once loose, he lets it fall over your shoulders and off your body completely.

After a few moments taking in the sight of you, Kakashi lets out a deep sigh and shakes his head.

“You’re so out of my league,” he confesses to you.

You let out a small giggle.

“Absolutely not,” you protest.

Without missing a beat, Kakashi grabs on to you and tosses you back on the bed so you are laying down underneath him. One of his hands wraps around the back of your head while the other cups your breast. Pulling the fabric of your bra down, he kneads your nipple between his thumb and pointer finger. One of his knees lands in between your legs and he brings it up to press on to you. You can’t help the moan that escapes as you feel him all around you.

“So what’s the deal?” Kakashi teases. “I leave you alone in the house for one day and I come back to this?” He looks down at your body and back up again. “Where did you get this outfit, hm?”

“Oh baby,” you start teasing him back, “I guess one thing you don’t know about me yet is that I wear lingerie like this all the time.”

“Oh really?” he questions.

“Yep, all the time.” You smirk at what you’re about to say next. “Actually, remember that one time we were stationed together in the Earth country for a month for that S-rank assassination mission?”

Kakashi nods, confused where you’re going with this story.

“We let our guards down and almost hooked up the last night before we came back to the village.”

“I remember.”

“Well,” you pause for effect, “guess what I was wearing underneath my uniform that night?”

Kakashi remains silent, brows furrowed waiting for you. You smile at him deviously as you say your answer.

“This.”

Kakashi lets out what can only be described as an aroused, defeated groan when you utter your confession. He quickly comes back down and your mouths crash together in a heated frenzy. It isn’t until now when you realize that his bulge is hard against your leg, asking to be broken free from the confinement of his pants. While making out, you reach down and slip your hand under his waistband and grab onto his throbbing cock, stroking it in your hand. Although rock hard, the skin of his cock is soft and velvety.

Kakashi moans in your mouth when you make contact with him, but quickly escapes your grasp and gets up off of you. Sprawled out on the bed, you watch him strip down naked in front of you, starting with his shirt, then his pants and briefs. His body is truly something to marvel at, as decades of being a ninja have carved his body into perfection. You love the way his member slaps against his lower stomach when he pulls it from its confinement, excited and eager for you. He stands for a moment, contemplating what to do with you.

“I don’t want to take that pretty outfit off of you just yet. I guess I’ll just have to work around it for now,” Kakashi says as he stands at the end of the bed. Grabbing your ankles, he pulls you towards him and bends your legs upward until your knees meet your chest. Holding both of your legs up with one hand, he takes the other and spanks your ass cheek with a loud slap. You whimper from the sting while he rubs the mark he left. Kakashi sucks in another loud breath.

“Ugh, (y/n), you look so good for me.”

Before you can respond, Kakashi takes your thong and slides it over so you are exposed to him. Getting down on his knees, he brings his face to your glistening cunt and flattens his tongue against it. There he gives you one long lick up your slit to taste you. A moan erupts from him as your wetness meets his taste buds.

“You’re already so wet for me baby,” Kakashi breathes before going in to suck on you.

“I’ve been thinking about you all day,” you confess through your moans. “I only get this wet for you.”

“That’s because you're mine and mine only.”

Kakashi takes his time with you, almost as if this is his last meal on earth and he wants to savor it. He’s delicate in some moments and fierce in others. Incorporating his fingers, he slides them into you and curves them up to hit your g-spot repeatedly while eating you. Your hand instinctively cradles his face while the other intertwines with his silver locks. You start to feel tightness in your lower stomach as he brings you close to climax. The sound of his moans muffled inside you is enough to send you over the edge.

“Kakashi, baby, I’m gonna-”

“Come for me, baby,” Kakashi nods, giving you permission to let go.

Letting go of Kakashi, you grip onto the sheets around you, feeling the tightness build and drop out of you. Closing your eyes, the waves of ecstasy ripple throughout your body causing you to scream out in pleasure. Riding with you, Kakashi slowly continues to work you through your climax, cleaning up whatever juices spill over.

“Good girl,” He says to you while bringing your legs back down onto the bed. Slowly, he kisses up your thighs while hooking onto your thong, bringing it down off of them. While he does this, you reach around and unclasp your bra, throwing it aside. Once the thong is thrown aside as well, Kakashi lifts himself off the floor and flips you over so you're laying on your stomach, another smack landing on your ass cheek. The high from your orgasm is immediately replaced with anticipation for what he plans on doing to you next.

You feel Kakashi’s naked body slide on top of you until he's flush against your skin, his body completely enveloping yours. Once his face is level with yours, and his cock is hard against your backside, he brushes your hair away from your face.

“Are you ready for me?” Kakashi whispers into your ear.

You nod into the mattress, chest rising and falling with every strained breath.

“You need to use your words, (y/n),” Kakashi scolds you while tucking your hair behind your ear.

“I need you, Kakashi. Please, I need you.” Your words come out as a plea, not being able to take his absence any longer.

You feel Kakashi’s weight lift off of you as he reaches around your waist and lifts it up so your ass is tilted upwards. From there you can feel him position his tip at your entrance, slowly rubbing it up and down to spread your wetness.

“Please, Kashi, I need your cock inside me,” you beg.

Without further hesitation, you feel every inch of him slide into your folds until he’s bottomed out inside you. The feeling of him deep within you sends you into euphoria and you can feel yourself tighten around him.

“Fuck, you feel so good,” Kakashi whispers.

Starting off slow, he pumps into you with control. You feel pleasure and pain as Kakashi kisses your neck while grabbing onto your hair. After each thrust you feel him going faster and harder, your bodies smacking against each other. To gain more leverage, he lifts off of you and brings you up onto your hands and knees. With his hand gripping your shoulder, he pumps into you with ferocity.

“For years I’ve touched myself thinking about getting to fuck you like this baby. You’re so beautiful and so good to me. Everything about your body draws me to you,” Kakashi says in between moans. You feel him start to twitch inside you, his thrusts getting more out of control. You look over your shoulder and meet his gaze.

“We deserve this baby. You deserve this. Give me everything.” You both know your words mean more than just sex, and Kakashi relishes them.

Lifting you up by your neck, Kakashi brings you toward him so you're both kneeling while he continues thrusting inside of you. He brings one hand around your front to circle your clit and the other cups your breast. Your hands lift up behind you to grab onto his face. Turning your head to him, you kiss him with every ounce of passion you have left. This new position is hitting you at your core and you can feel yourself tighten again. Kakashi must have felt it too, as he broke free from your mouth to tilt his head back in pleasure. Without exchanging words, you know you both are at your limit.

With a few last staggering thrusts, both of you reach climax in unison. Feeling yourself go limp, Kakashi wraps his arms around you to keep you steady. You feel streams of his hot semen pool inside of your contracting walls. With Kakashi’s moans singing in your ear, you can’t help but smirk at his vulnerability. With him still inside, you hold onto each other, trying to catch your breaths. After a few beats, you both begin to laugh at your exasperated states.

“Stay here, I’m going to get a towel,” Kakashi says while shifting out of you. After pulling a towel from the cupboard in your bathroom, Kakashi brings it to you and cleans up between your legs. Before you have time to move, Kakashi picks you up bridal style and spins you around in his arms.

You scream and start to laugh as he plants kisses all over your face. “Kakashi!”

“Hm?” he hums in your ear, pretending he didn’t just lift you with little to no effort.

Holding you up with one arm, he grabs a blanket off the bed and carries you to the chair in the corner of your room. There he sits down and places you sideways on his lap so you’re facing each other. He then takes the blanket and wraps it around you both so you can stay warm while cuddling each other. Kakashi has always had a knack for knowing exactly what you want at any given moment.

“I thought we could get some inspiration for our next round,” Kakashi says with a smirk as he pulls out a copy of Icha Icha Tactics from underneath the cushion.

“What? How did that get there?” you laugh.

“Oh, I have multiple copies of these everywhere,” he jokes, waving the book in the air.

You laugh and lightly hit his chest. Tucking the blanket up closer to your face, you lay your head down on Kakashi’s shoulder while he flips open to a page in the book.

Before he starts to read to you, Kakashi lifts your chin to kiss you. Every time your lips touch his, flashes of your joint past enters your mind. Although it was hard, and you faced many difficult trials on the way, you are forever thankful that you were both able to live long enough to experience these moments. You took care of each other, lifted each other up when they were in the dirt, and now you can finally share the love you’ve always held for each other. You wouldn’t change any of it. After your kiss, before pulling away from you, Kakashi looks deep into your eyes.

“I love you, (y/n).”

You smile up at him, tears brimming in your eyes.

“I love you too, Kakashi. Forever.”

-

A/n cont.: Well, whattdaya think? :)

[noteguk]

bad behavior | jjk | m

This is in the same universe as “bad influence.” It can, however, be read as a stand-alone. 

— summary; in which staying late to volunteer at a self-help meeting was the best decision you made in a while. 

— contents and warnings; smut, the endless adventures of badboy!jk x goodgirl!reader, public sex (in a church…), dirty talk, fingering, degradation (name calling) but also praise, unprotected sex, clothed sex, creampie, cum play, there is a window and also reflections, rough sex, cockwarming, jk being a lil shit because that’s his main personality trait, jk smokes (only mentioned), enemies to fuckbuddies: dawn of the first day 

— words; 8.2k

— author’s note; for the anon that asked how their first time was like ;) join me as we explore the lore of this godforsaken couple 

It was your mother’s idea for you to find a new place to volunteer. According to her, it had been a long time since you experienced “the invigorating energy of community work” — last time was when you were trying to level up your college application — and it could really “soothe your anxious soul” during the trying times of college finals. Apparently one tutoring program and two research projects weren’t enough to distract you, but you could see where she was coming from. 

In the end, you accepted. The old places you used to volunteer in had either shut off their programs or were just too far away from college for you to consider. At first, you decided to follow your mother’s suggestion and tried to work with children — “small miracles”, as she called them — in a local daycare. Which ended up being a terrible idea. 

You liked giving back to the community, you really did, but it wasn’t long until you realized that working with infants hasn’t been your wisest decision, and that children weren’t miracles at all. You got tired of going home covered in paint and with pieces of playdough entangled in your hair, and that was when you weren’t unlucky enough to get hit with other, less clean fluids. 

So you eventually gave up — both on the daycare and on the faint idea of one day going into pediatrics — and searched for a new place. After having to yell your way through retirement homes, and getting fed up with washing people’s sidewalks, you finally settled in a program that was flexible and light enough for your intense college hours: preparing (and then later cleaning up) a room that was reserved in a local church for weekly meetings. 

The entire ordeal took about two to three hours off your day, and more than half of it was spent as free time: waiting for the meeting to end, cramming piles of information in a small room next door. You didn’t really know what the meetings were about since they changed practically every month — they were, at first, a support group for teenage mothers, then it became an AA meeting, then a group for drug users trying to quit. Lately, you were starting to think that the church just gave away the room for whoever had the money to rent it, so it wasn’t a surprise when it was reserved for a motivational speaker to give confidence lessons. 

You had researched the guy, some old dude with an unpronounceable name and a sketchy background, and found exactly the type of person you had expected. Yes, you were in the house of Christ, but you were still being heavily judgmental of the fact that he was giving those talks when he had no qualifications whatsoever, and was probably making bank off all the self-help books he regurgitated at least twice a year to prey on vulnerable people. You did share your worries with the administrative office of the church, but they ultimately fell on deaf ears, and you gave up on the idea of kicking his ass out of the holy grounds anytime soon. 

It was after one of those pseudo-motivational talks that you walked into the empty room, ready to clean everything up before rushing back to your place, where your roommate had promised to greet you with some wonderful takeout. The chairs were still placed in a circle on the center of the room, where they had been since forever, and you made sure to align them perfectly before you moved on to the litter that had been thrown around the place. 

One good thing about those self-help meetings was that they were a lot cleaner than a lot of other attendees, so the “picking up the trash until your back started to hurt” part passed by surprisingly fast. You had just moved on to the snack table, analyzing what you could still save, when your soul almost left your body. 

“Hey, you,” you heard a known voice behind you. “What are you doing in here?”

You swiftly turned around, heart thumping violently against your ribcage. You didn’t know how you hadn’t let out the biggest, most blood-curdling scream ever, but that was just the first of many miracles of the night. “Jesus Christ,” you wheezed out, taking one hand to your chest. “You shouldn’t sneak up on people like this.” You swallowed dry, some part of your brain recalling that he had asked you a question. “And I’m volunteering here.” 

“I didn’t sneak up on you, you’re just jumpy.” Jungkook scoffed, leaning against the doorframe with that stupid playful smirk curling up on his lips. You didn’t know they allowed demons inside the church. “And of course you are.” He rolled his eyes. 

Maybe a few months back, his mocking tone would’ve stung a bit more. However, you had been tutoring Jungkook for about three months then, suffering through endless sessions of his whining and complaining, and you’ve grown used to his passive-aggressive antics already. You learned that Jungkook was a shark seeking for blood, waiting for any crack that would allow him to jump into a perverse little joke — about how you behaved, your priorities, or even the color of your highlighter. You, of course, always stood your ground and threw his comments right back at him — which was his initial plan, as you’ve come to realize. Jungkook enjoyed playfully arguing with you, and you thought that it was another level of strangeness and masochism you simply didn’t have time to dissect. 

Still, Jungkook (shockingly) wasn’t the terrible person you once thought he was. Every once in a while — when he was trying to talk you out of teaching him — the conversations you two would have were actually mostly pleasant, and he wasn’t awful to hang around when he dropped the whole badass persona to act like a real human being. You would even dare to say that Jungkook could be actually funny at times, and not in the bitter, sarcastic way he usually was. Sometimes, you dared to think, he could actually be reasonably nice. And also kind of cute. Even hot. 

But you would never actually admit any of that out loud. Or even to yourself, really. 

“And you?” You asked, turning back around to face the table full of half-eaten food. That looked like a battlefield, and you could already tell that there were only a few survivors left standing. “What are you doing here? Repenting?” 

Jungkook chuckled dryly. “You wish. My parents want me to quit smoking,” he said. You could not see him, but you could hear him walking closer to you as you fumbled with the large Tupperware. “We settled on this crap instead of a forced intervention.” 

You scoffed. Most of the food before you was unsalvageable — some of the cupcakes had been bitten once and then placed back, and you wondered how someone like that could function in society. “You don’t seem very motivated to quit,” you mumbled. 

Jungkook clicked his tongue. “I don’t really care.” 

His voice was much closer to you, and you felt the air leaving your lungs for a pitiful instant. You convinced yourself you had only gotten scared again. “You should care about the growing possibility of lung cancer.” 

He shrugged. “Maybe. But it’s not really on the top of my list of priorities at the moment.” 

“And what is?” You asked. 

“Amongst other things…” he trailed off and, suddenly, he was standing besides you, pointing at the chaotic pile of sweets. “I actually came back to grab another one of those cupcakes. The chocolate ones are great.” 

You didn’t know why, but his comment broke the odd tension that you didn’t even know that was there, clicking you back into your previous mentality — the one that you just wanted to finish cleaning up so you could leave soon. “All yours,” you told him, “grab as many as you want.” 

Jungkook hummed in satisfaction, reaching out to grab one special brown cupcake — an untouched one, thankfully. “I love when you talk dirty.” He almost moaned before shoving the cupcake inside his mouth, taking a huge bite off it. Dramatically, Jungkook rolled his eyes and sighed in delight. “These are fucking great.” 

You chuckled, glancing at his direction. Jungkook was dressed in all black, like he usually was, and you were starting to recognize a newfound admiration towards his constant use of leather jackets. What? He looked good. “I’m glad the self-help sessions are paying off,” you commented, swiftly placing the cupcakes inside the transparent container. 

Jungkook was paying attention to your actions now, like he noticed you were there working for the first time. “What are you doing with the rest?”

“The church will probably donate it, give it to the homeless or something.” You shrugged. “Or they’ll eat it, I don’t know. I just clean up the place and leave.” 

Jungkook laughed at that, taking another monstrous bite from his cupcake and throwing himself on one of the nearby chairs. Your eye twitched a little at the thought that he had ruined your perfect circle, but you’d have to fix that on your way out. “Sounds absurdly boring,” he sang. “And they’re not even paying you.” 

You sighed. “After all the places I’ve volunteered in, boring is a blessing,” you told him. You had just placed five hot dogs in the container, and you were starting to wonder if it would be a good idea to feed people in need with those suspicious sausages. “But, yeah, you probably don’t care about any of that.” 

“You don’t know what I care about,” Jungkook said matter-of-factly. You didn’t know if he was trying to tease you, but his voice came out so soft and monotone that you couldn’t really be mad about it. It was true, after all: you didn’t actually know what he cared about. Sometimes you thought that he could read you better than you could read him. “Want me to stay here with you? This place is probably empty already.”

You could not hold back your laugh at that, turning around so you could look at him. “Are you offering to be my bodyguard? In a church?” 

Jungkook pouted. There was a thin line of chocolate on the side of his lips, which he quickly licked clean. “I’m trying to be nice.”

You giggled, turning back towards the disgusting food. The rest was mostly trash, but you were happy enough with the amount you had managed to find in a good state. “That’s new.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He asked. “I’m always nice.”

“Always is a strong word.” You smiled, closing the lid of the Tupperware. You had managed to fill three small containers with the leftovers and, honestly, that was a big victory. “But you can stay or you can leave, I don’t mind. I’m almost done anyways.” 

He frowned. “Is that your answer?” 

You turned around. “What? You want me to beg for your company?” You smiled. “You’re mistaken if you think I’d ever do that.”

“I’m staying.” Jungkook crumpled up the piece of cupcake wrapping and threw it in the trash can besides your body. He watched you for a moment as you started to throw the leftovers away, your back turned to him and a distracted look on your face. When he broke the silence again, you were throwing the last piece of bread in the bin. “Why are you volunteering?” 

“Because I like giving back to the community.” 

Jungkook sneered at your words. “Seriously now. Don’t lie, we’re in a church.” 

“I do, actually,” you stood your ground. There was a vague sound of crickets coming from the half-open window and the low buzzing of the fluorescent lights above you, but, other than that, the city was covered in absolute silence. Perhaps that was why you felt so at peace. “But my mom told me it would be a good thing to keep myself relaxed. You know, take my mind off college stuff.” 

He hummed, and you heard him getting up from the chair. “You always do what your mom tells you?” 

You met his gaze. “Didn’t your parents make you come here?”

He smiled. “Not the point.” 

Before you could hold yourself back, your lips were curling up. Again: Jungkook wasn’t absolutely awful to be around when he actually acted like a human being. “When she says something I agree with, yes,” you told him. “My ego isn’t bruised when it comes to following someone’s idea.” 

He raised his eyebrows. “You’re saying that mine is?”

“I didn’t say that.” You smirked and turned back to the table. You started piling up the used plastic cups, already eyeing all the used plates, forks and knives that you’d have to throw away. The daycare had better eating manners than that. “Thought we were talking about me.” 

“We were,” Jungkook agreed. One of his inked hands moved to the table, and you were about to tell him that he could eat more of the cupcakes when you realized that he had started to reach for the discardable plates, throwing them away. You really didn’t think he’d help you. “Finals are coming up, though, and you care about that shit. Shouldn’t you be using this time to study or something?”

“I study while you’re out here listening to becoming your real self or, I don’t know... waking up the giant within,” you said. “I’m fine, don’t worry about it.” 

He hummed, his nose cringing up at the disgusting remains of food that stuck to the plastic forks. Jungkook seriously didn’t know how you could do that for fun. “You know there are better ways to relax than cleaning up a dusty room, right?” 

“Probably,” you agreed. The cups were already in the trash, alongside with the plates, and there were only a few crumpled up napkins to get rid of before you tasted the sweet nectar of freedom. “But here I am. That’s what I chose for myself.” 

“Literally any other option would’ve been better,” Jungkook pressed on. “Isn’t that obnoxious friend of yours in cheer or something?” 

“Who? Jisoo?” You smiled at him. No one had ever called her obnoxious, but you couldn’t say that the title didn’t fit. Jisoo could be really… intense when it came to standing up for what she believed in. “She is. She invited me to join her already, if that’s what you’re gonna ask, but it’s not really my thing.” 

“It’s a shame,” he mumbled, leaning against the table. It was a beautiful miracle how clean that room had become just by getting rid of the piles of gross food, and you had proudly thrown the last piece of paper inside the trash bin when Jungkook spoke up again. “You’d look really hot in that outfit.” 

You stopped in your tracks, taking a second to digest the claim he had so mindlessly thrown your way. Just like all-things-Jungkook, a pleasant conversation could not last long, so you weren’t even surprised that he managed to ruin that talk with such a fuckboy-esque comment. 

Also like all-things-Jungkook, he managed to awaken a reaction out of you that you didn’t even know could be there. With a faint heat in your cheeks and a frown blossoming amongst your features, you actually felt a little bit of... satisfaction with the fact that he thought that you’d look hot in that skimpy outfit. At the same time, you wanted to slap yourself for falling into his charms so easily. 

In that conflicting turmoil of emotions, all you could say was a monotone, “You cannot be serious right now.”

Even if you kind of wanted him to be serious. 

“I’m being dead serious,” Jungkook didn’t back down, much to the elation of your ego. You felt like a schoolgirl being recognized by her crush, and the idea alone made your stomach curl onto itself. What the hell were you even thinking about? Yeah, Jungkook was pretty hot, but he was also kind of a douche and you didn’t want to get involved with that mess of a person. Or at least that was what you were trying to convince yourself of. “I mean…” he continued, “you’re even rocking this knee-level dress right now, can’t even imagine how you’d look if—“ 

“You can shut up now, Jungkook, thanks,” you interrupted him. Because you didn’t know how to act when he was so blatantly flirting with you, you switched back to the same passive-aggressive behavior that you had given him for the past three months. Call it self-preservation, call it panic, but your mind simply didn’t know where to go from there. “And I’m also done here, so you can skidaddle back to whatever swamp you came out of.” 

“Awn, don’t be mean, princess.” He pouted. Jungkook was a master at getting you worked up, and you had just given that to him on a silver platter. Maybe if you had mock-flirted back, he would’ve baked away. You would never know. “I was just fucking with you, you’re too easy to tease.” 

You pressed your lips together, hip touching the corner of the now empty table. “You were pretty much harassing me,” you said playfully. 

“I was not.” Jungkook smirked, shoving his hands inside the pockets of his pants. When had the two of you gotten so close? There was barely any space between your chests. “But it’s okay, I’m not gonna compliment you anymore, don’t worry. You don’t have to be so defensive.” 

“I’m not being defensive,” you said, defensive. 

“What, is it the church setting?” He raised his eyebrows, taking a look around. “Is it making you uncomfortable?” 

“No,” you answered, crossing your arms before your chest. Jungkook followed the movement and his gaze got stuck on the shape of your breasts for a second too long, making a newfound wave of heat rise up to your cheeks. “Not as much as you’re trying to make me uncomfortable right now.” 

He chuckled. “You do look cute when you’re shy,” Jungkook teased, taking a step towards you, and you took another one back, pretending you were just going to lean against the table. You sat on it in a weird diagonal position, with one leg still on the ground and the other dangling over the edge. Jungkook was so close that, when he spoke again, voice just above a whisper, you could feel his breath on your skin. “If you don’t want me here, just ask me to go and I’ll go.” 

You opened your mouth to respond, but no words came out. The atmosphere was filled with electricity, your body drowning in the warmth of his presence, the sharp seriousness in his dark eyes, and you could not bring yourself to say anything. Did you want him to leave? 

No, you realized in a rush of adrenaline, you didn’t want him to leave at all. 

Jungkook raised one of his eyebrows. “Hm? Nothing?” He smirked, placing himself between your legs. Every nerve of your body was screaming for you to touch him, to just wrap his mouth with yours, and you simply could not respond to any of its commands. “You’re full of surprises.” 

You found your voice at that comment, heart hammering against your chest. “What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“You’re a smart girl, you can figure it out.” Jungkook placed one strand of your hair behind your ear, his gaze flickering down to your chest. From where he stood, he could see the beautiful mounds of your breasts peeking under the fabric, licking his lips at the sight. “Can I at least say that I like your dress?” 

Jungkook’s palm slithered up your knee before you could even react, moving towards your inner thigh and raising your dress along with it. His touch was electrifying, and you found yourself craving more of it, a sigh caught on your throat at the tenderness of his hot skin. 

“Something tells me that your compliment isn’t so innocent,” you told him, leaning your head back slightly so you could hold his gaze. “Aren’t you gonna complete that and say that I would look better without it?”

Jungkook chuckled. “The idea is compelling, I’ll admit it,” he said, rubbing soft circles on your skin. His other hand slithered around your waist, pulling you closer to him. “But don’t need to take it off to fuck you.” 

Your eyes grew wide at that, brain short-circuiting. You frankly couldn’t believe that was happening — the fact that Jungkook was so shamelessly trying (and honestly succeeding) to initiate sex with you. In a fucking church too, of all places. “What- what did you say?”

“You heard what I said.” His stare didn’t falter. Jungkook was looking at you like he could eat you whole, and you seriously wouldn’t mind if he tried to. You'd deal with the social and psychological implications of that another time. “Just tell me to stop and I’ll do it, princess. No hard feelings, promise.” 

This time, you spoke out and the firmness and certainty in your voice surprised even yourself. “I don’t want you to stop.” 

“No?” His voice sounded like honey, so deep and melodic even through the thick layers of his sarcasm. You had never heard him get so serious, so focused, and the thought that it was all for you was igniting a fire inside your guts. “You wanna get fucked in a church?” 

You bit your lip, blinking up at him. The point was: you wanted Jungkook, of all people, to fuck you. The fact that it was in a church was just the cherry on top, and you didn’t care about it as much as you should — your mom would be weeping blood if she knew what was going on, but you weren’t planning on telling anything to anybody. “And what if I do?” You asked back teasingly. 

Jungkook smiled, knocking the breath right out of you. You could only hope that you didn’t look as horny as you felt, because your pride was still on the line. “Told you that you were full of surprises.” He pushed one of your legs open, making you lose your support on the floor. Now, both of your feet were dangling off the edge, body trapped between his strong arms and thighs on either side of him. “Are you a virgin, baby?”

You shook your head, and your voice reached you a bit later. “No.”

“Naughty,” Jungkook said, leaning in. He stared at you like a lion stalking its prey, his gaze lingering on your parted lips before, at last, he tilted his head to the side, deciding to move towards your neck instead. “But if you have the taste I think you do, you probably had some lame missionary sex with some goodie-two shoes.” 

When he started kissing your neck, you almost forgot to give him a response. You had to bite your lip to suppress a moan, instead producing a low, shaky sigh. “And if I did? What’s the problem with some lame missionary sex?” 

“No need to get mad, I’m on your side here,” Jungkook said, one of his hands navigating up your waist, between the valley of your breasts, before grabbing your boob. That time, you couldn’t hold back the whimper that escaped you. “Did he make you cum?” 

“Sometimes,” you said, slightly flustered. You didn’t think you’d be discussing your sexual history with Jungkook, but, well, there you were. “He was alright.” 

“Only sometimes?” Jungkook chuckled, the vibrations of his deep timbre vibrating through the sensitive skin of your neck, his thumb grazing your nipple. The heat between your legs only grew, your entire body practically begging to feel more of him. “That’s a shame, I could do better.” 

You rolled your eyes. “Don’t start getting cocky.”

“I never stopped being cocky,” he responded without hesitation. Well, he was right. “And I do have a good track record.” 

“Doubt it,” you said, the ghost of a smile lingering on your lips. You knew that you were playing a dangerous game, pressing right at the weak spots of his inflated ego to see how he would react. Perhaps you’d be luckier trying to poke a bear with a short stick. “You wouldn’t know the difference between a real and fake orgasm even if it hit you in the face.” 

Jungkook leaned back and looked at you for an instant. You knew he had caught onto your challenge straight away. He liked it as much as you did, there was no doubt about that. “Let’s see, shall we?” he asked. There was no denying the devilish aura that was all around him now, suffocating you with its tempting heat. “How long do we have?”

“I’m locking up the room tonight,” you said, watching as his eyes sparked with an emotion you could not decipher. “But I wanna get home before ten. Have homework.” 

You could see him fighting against the natural urge to ridicule you for saying something like that at such an odd time, but, at the end, he managed to avoid it. “More than enough time.” Jungkook placed one hand on the back of your neck, gaze darting hungrily toward your lips. “Come here.”

And then his mouth was on yours, and everything else was white noise. Jungkook kissed you much slower than you had anticipated, taking his sweet time caressing your mouth with his; hands exploring the curves of your body and teasing their way underneath your dress. He sighed heavily against your mouth when you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss, his soft tongue poking out and entering your mouth perfectly. Jungkook was a good kisser, you had to admit it, and he got your knees weak sooner than you’d like. 

His body was hot and firm against yours and you could feel the outline of his abs underneath your fingers as you trailed your hands down his torso; his quick heartbeat drumming on your palms. Jungkook’s breathing got heavier as you hooked your fingers on the hem of his pants and tugged him toward you. Instantly you noticed the outline of his hard cock against your inner thigh. 

Then, something switched. Just as you had reached out to touch his hardness, squeezing it lightly underneath your fingers, Jungkook groaned against your mouth and bit down on your lip. You had barely any time to react before he was pulling away from the kiss, gaze darkening. 

“Such a tease,” he mumbled hoarsely, his breath hitting your mouth in soft waves. His hand was hovering over your heat, his middle finger pressing down on your sensitive nub, making you whimper. “You don’t know what you do to me.” 

Jungkook was much quicker than your thoughts and, within a second, the motion of your panties being pushed aside made you fumble closer to him; your hands holding tightly onto his shoulders when he finally decided to touch you. 

“Fuck,” he groaned next to your ear, making your mind go blank for a split second. The teasing motions of his digits brushing your entrance were enough to make you whimper, hips thrusting forward in a failed attempt to make him move further. “Look at this, you’re soaking my fingers. Wanna get fucked that bad?”

But he didn’t let you respond. The sudden intrusion of two fingers inside your pussy made your back arch, nails digging in the leather of his jacket as Jungkook opened you up. “I—” you tried to speak, but it was hard to think when he started pumping his fingers in and out of you. The sounds of your wetness were a filthy symphony filling the quiet atmosphere. “Jungkook, what—” 

“God, that’s so tight,” he groaned, speaking through clenched teeth. His voice was enough to shut you up at the spot, a frail moan dripping from your lips. “Relax, baby, you’re too tense. Let me take care of you, alright?” 

You nodded, eyes drifting shut as he continued to pump his fingers in and out of you. You hated to admit it, but Jungkook was already winning against your ex by a long shot: the way his digits brushed inside you, gradually moving apart to stretch you, got you searching — begging — for more. You were sure you could cum around his fingers and, when he curled them up and they dragged against your sweet spot, the idea became a lot more palpable. 

“Jungkook, you’re taking too long, I’m gonna cum like this,” you complained, chest rising and falling under the waves of your upcoming orgasm. You could feel it building up in your stomach, ready to snap, and you didn’t want it to happen around his fingers. “I wanna feel you.” 

Jungkook breathed out at your needy request, placing a kiss against your jaw. “I’m just getting you ready for my cock, baby,” he said. A loud moan dripped from you when he unceremoniously added a third finger, your legs trembling on either side of his body. “I don’t know if you can take it.”

You scoffed. “Don’t flatter yourself,” you said, only half aware of the fact that your voice sounded more like a whimper than a serious comment. “I can.” 

He smirked wickedly. You really were pushing his buttons. “We’ll see about that,” Jungkook responded. 

Within a second, right as your orgasm was about to wash over you, he removed his fingers from your pussy. The frustrated moan you let out was quickly swollen by him, his mouth rogue against yours and the sweetness of his tongue intoxicating you — probably those stupid cupcakes, you thought. 

“Turn around for me,” he asked. 

You quickly did as he requested, putting your feet on the ground before turning your back to him, hands leaning on the table. Jungkook placed one hand on the curve of your spine, pushing you down until you had your chest against the surface, ass perked up and pussy in full display for him. There was a gush of cold air against your flesh when he pulled up the fabric of your dress and tossed it over your waist, exposing your lower body for him.

The boy hummed at the sight, one of his legs kicking your feet apart so he could position himself in the middle of your thighs. “You’re pretty all around,” Jungkook commented, one of his palms grazing your asscheek before grabbing it. His motion was harsh, needy; earning a whimper from you. “Knew you would be.” 

Through the dense clouds of your desire, there was still some part of you that managed to make fun of that situation. “You spend your free time thinking about my ass?”

“Won’t answer until I have a lawyer present,” he joked. 

You felt his fingers hooking around the fabric of your panties, pushing it further to the side so you had your cunt fully exposed for him to see. The drumming of your heartbeat almost drowned out the low groan he produced at the sight of your flushed heat. 

“Princess, your pussy is dripping so much…” Jungkook trailed off, one of his fingers tracing a line between your lips. He felt the urge to eat you out, to lick you completely clean and make you cum on his tongue, but he decided that would have to wait for a different time. “Is this all for me?” 

“Yeah, all for you,” you said, weak. There was a thundering exasperation building up inside you, motivated from your denied orgasm and from the way that Jungkook was taking his sweet time. 

“Good girl,” he mumbled and your chest was filled with pride. “Can’t wait to fuck it.” 

“Then don’t wait,” you practically begged. “Just rush.”

He removed his finger from your heat. “Shh… be patient,” Jungkook told you and you swore you could practically hear the smile in his voice. You could hear him shuffling behind you, the sound of his zipper opening echoing around that still room. “I’m gonna give you whatever you want.” 

You whined at the abrupt feeling of his warm cock rubbing between your folds, its tip hitting your clit after every languid thrust. “Fuck,” you cried out, shaky. Jungkook wasn’t lying when he said that he was big, his length was so thick that you were starting to get second thoughts whether you could take it or not. Not that you would ever admit it out loud. “Just put it in, Jungkook.” 

But Jungkook was having way more fun just teasing you. “Pussy’s so wet for me.” He breathed out, his hands tightening around your hips. You felt him throb between your folds, and the sensation got you searching for air. “You’re soaking my cock, baby. You want it that much?”

“Y-Yeah.”  

Jungkook hummed, leaning in so he could place a kiss on your shoulder. “I’m gonna fuck you like you deserve to be fucked, princess,” he promised, his length still rubbing between your folds. He was so hard and heavy that your mind was spinning, your lungs drowning in expectation. “Gonna fuck you so well that you’re never going to forget it. Do you want that?”

“Yes,” your voice was a pathetic moan, and you hated your body for betraying you so easily. “Yes, please.” 

After another pec on your shoulder, Jungkook leaned back. “Be loud for me, alright?” He asked. “Can you do that for me?”

You swallowed hard — what were the chances that someone would hear you? You had no idea. “Yeah, whatever you want, just fuck me.”

“Whatever I want? That’s a dangerous thing to say.” He moved around behind you, making you flinch when you felt his cock align with your dripping entrance. The anticipation was driving you insane. “Might have to see if you’re up for it another time.” 

There was an answer somewhere in your mind — you could swear there was — but it was quickly forgotten the second that Jungkook pushed himself inside you. The drag of his cock was a delicious torture, streching you out and filling you up to the brim until you were shaking under his touch, both of you moaning at the sensation. 

“Oh my god.” You breathed out, hands turning into fists on the table. Your cheek was pressed against the polished wood, hot breath creating small white clouds on the surface. 

Jungkook released a shaky sigh when he felt you clenching around him, your body desperately trying to move closer to him. “Fuck, baby,” he hissed, his hands holding onto your hips for dear life. Gradually, he moved himself away from your pussy just so he could slam back inside, marveling on the way you trembled at the feeling, crying out his name in the prettiest of whimpers. “Your pussy is so fucking tight. Squeezing my cock so well.” 

Took you only an instant to realize that you were absolutely addicted to the feeling of his cock inside you, the heavenly push of his hardness in and out of you as he slowly started to set a pace. “Oh my god, I’m—” a pitiful hiccup interrupted you, turning your voice into a sharp cry. “That’s so good, Jungkook.”

Jungkook chuckled behind you, his thrusts starting to pick up speed. Your eyes closed in endless bliss, every part of your brain focused on the sensation of his fat length stretching you up. “Told you I’d be, not my fault you didn’t believe me,” he said, but you could tell that his confidence had started to wear itself thin — he, too, seemed to be much more focused on the way that your bodies met. “Do you touch yourself, princess?”

You almost didn’t know how to answer him, a deep heat rushing up to your cheeks. “W-What?”

“When you’re alone, baby,” he practically hissed. You were bouncing on the table then, your body jerking up and down as he fully pistoned his cock inside your heat. “Do you play with your little pussy?”

“Y-yes,” you stammered, embarrassed. “S-Sometimes.” 

“Show me how you do it,” he requested in-between huffs, lust dripping from every syllable. Jungkook spoke to you like a siren, effortlessly inducting you to comply with everything he wanted. “Come on. Don’t be shy, I wanna see you play with yourself for me.” 

You didn’t even know if what you were feeling was shyness, but there was a veil of hesitation that covered your actions. As your hands moved downwards, one of them clenching around the fabric of your dress and pulling it up while the other trailed over your mound, you felt strangely vulnerable, exposed. At the same time, you wanted to do what he asked you to, wanted him to wash you over with compliments until your mind was going blank. 

So you closed your eyes and focused on the sensation of two of your fingers coating themselves in your wetness, then their pressure on your clit. You whined at the feeling, pleasure exploding in your veins as you started to rub yourself, tracing small circles on your sensitive spot. There was no way you could ever reach that sensation again, the sweet motions of your fingers combining perfectly with the thrusts of his hard, fat cock inside you. You were doomed. 

“That’s it… just like that, baby,” Jungkook whispered, obsessed with the sensation of your walls fluttering around him. You had gotten so tight that he thought he would see heaven at any second now. “Feels good?” 

“Y-Yeah, so good...” you struggled to get out, “feels amazing, Jungkook.” 

“So perfect for me,” his praise shot straight up to your core, making you mewl under him. God, the way that you were tightening around him was going to drive him insane. “You feel so fucking good, I can’t stop fucking you.” 

Jungkook took one of his hands to your neck, using it to guide your body upwards until you had your back pressed against his chest; his hot lips assaulting your neck. The new position made it so much easier for his cock to drill inside you, reaching even deeper and hitting sweet spots you didn’t even know you had. It wasn’t long before you were moaning out, eyes fluttering shut as the pleasure overtook you. 

“Just take a look at that, baby,” his voice broke you out of your hypnotized state.  “Look at you. Such a good slut, just taking everything I’m giving you, touching yourself for my cock… fuck. Could watch you like this forever.” 

You had to take a moment to understand what he was talking about, and then you saw it: the window. It stood silently across the room from you, half open, and the glass combined with the darkness of the night gave a perfect reflection of the two of you. You could see yourself, the mess you had become, as Jungkook pounded in and out of you and your fingers worked on your clit; the darkness of his hungry gaze as he followed the motions of your body against his. 

Even if you cried out at the sight, your body freezed up a little at the thought of someone walking by and seeing that private spectacle. The possibility itself was minimal — the window gave way to the side of the land, where a big, thick fence separated it from the nearby houses; most of the ground covered by large trees and bushes — but it wasn’t zero. You couldn’t even begin to imagine the humiliation that would come from being seen like that. 

He, of course, noticed your change of demeanor right away, and you could see in the faint reflection that he had smirked at that realization. “What is it? Are you worried someone is going to walk by?” Jungkook almost groaned against your ear. His cock continued to pump ferociously in and out of you, and you couldn’t even understand your own thoughts for a moment. “That someone is gonna see you get fucked like a good slut?” 

“It’s not—” a moan cut your sentence short. Not like you knew where you were heading, anyways. 

“No one is gonna see you like this, know why?” Jungkook was grunting, his fingers tightening around your throat. You cried out at the feeling, your cunt clenching around him in a way that got him fucking you even harder. “Cause this is all for me. Just for me.” 

Then he was pushing you back on the table, your chest crashing against the wooden surface and his hands yanking you by the waist. Jungkook was fucking you so hard that your worries left you as soon as they arrived, your mind a turmoil of desires and broken exclamations that didn’t give space to anything else but him. 

“You look fucking gorgeous like this, stuffed with cock,” he marveled at the sight. There was a known wave of pleasure hovering over you, ready to crash at any given moment, and you stopped rubbing yourself just so you could prolong its arrival. “Wanna see you cum for me, make a mess for me, baby.” 

The words left you in a confusing, broken order, “Jungkook, I can’t… too much… can’t...” 

“Shhh, you can,” he was slowly easing you into your orgasm, his cock drilling in and out of your pussy. Jungkook fucked like a machine, fast and precise, and you didn’t think you’d be able to forget that anytime soon. “You told me you could take it, so now you’re gonna take it. Don’t you wanna be good for me?” 

“I- I want to… I’m so close,” you cried out, pressing your forehead against the table. You didn’t know how it hadn’t broken yet, with the way that Jungkook was fucking you so mercilessly hard. “I’m so, so close.”

“Cream my cock, baby, come on,” he urged you on, his member throbbing inside you at the thought. Your legs were so weak that you knew you’d fall facedown on the floor if he wasn’t supporting your weight with his strong arms. “Be a good girl and cream my cock for me.” 

And that was it. That was all that you needed to push yourself over the edge, submerging you in ecstasy and making you squeeze him so deliciously. “J-Jungkook!” You moaned out his name again and again, unsure of how loud you were being, but also not caring as much as you should. Jungkook realized he loved hearing you call his name more than anything else. “Fuck! Oh my god!”

“That’s it, baby,” he moaned back, his thrusts a sloppy, uncoordinated mess. He was hypnotized by the view of your cunt hugging him, your wetness dripping down your thighs as you rode out the last seconds of your orgasm. “Pussy’s so fucking tight, so fucking perfect— gonna cum too.” 

You gasped out at the sensitivity that was starting to spread, every movement shaky as you tried to push yourself against him. “Yes, please.” You looked over your shoulder, meeting his hooded gaze. Jungkook looked like a god, his dark hair sweaty and messy and his lip trapped between his teeth. That image would plague you forever. “Cum inside me, please.” 

He groaned loudly, eyes closing for a second. “Fuck, that’s so fucking hot,” he hissed, chest heaving with anticipation. You knew he was close, everything pointed to that, and all that you wanted was to see him reach his high, using your body like it was just a doll for him to fuck. “Didn’t know you’d want to be filled up with cum, princess.” 

“I’m full of surprises.” You smiled — a pretty, fucked-out smile that got Jungkook grunting like a madman. “I want your cum inside me, Jungkook, please.” 

“Gonna fuck you full of my cum, don’t worry— Shit.” The sounds he was making were heavily: those breathy, high-pitched moans that echoed all around you; broken by deep grunts that had your thighs shaking. Jungkook fucked himself in you like he was meant for it, throwing his head back and closing his eyes as he finally found his orgasm. “Fuck! That’s it, fuck—”

Jungkook called out your name and mixed it with praises and curses when he came, spilling himself inside your pussy. You sighed at the feeling, taking in the blissful sensation of having his hot cum spilling out of you, dripping down your legs as he continued to thrust inside you, milking out his orgasm. 

At last, he started to wince from sensitivity. His body collided against your back, his heavy breathing fanning your neck as he tried to collect himself. “Fuck, baby,” he mumbled, “you’re amazing.” 

“You’re not so terrible yourself.” You could not help the smile that appeared on your lips, nor the way that you melted against the surface of the table, drowning in his heat. 

Still, you couldn’t stay there for much longer: it was already a miracle that no one heard the chaos going on in that room, and you weren’t trying to push your luck for the night. Especially since you had a pile of homework (and possibly — now cold — takeout) waiting for you at home. 

You raised your body, leaning against your elbows. “I have to leave,” you told him, taking one of your hands to lay on top of his tattooed one, trying to ease his grip from your waist. “Now if you could just…” 

“Shhh, shhh,” Jungkook hushed, unrelenting. He was much stronger than you, and your muscles were too weak for you to try and do much, so you eventually gave up. “Stop moving. Let me feel you around me for just a bit more.” 

You frowned. “Why?”

“I like it,” he said simply. His breath was a faint caress against the skin of your neck, and you didn’t have much fight left in you. “We all have our tastes.” 

You rolled your eyes. “You’re so weird.”

“Don’t kinkshame.” Jungkook pouted, then pressed a kiss against your shoulder. “You just begged me to fuck you in a church, remember?” 

“Yeah, I guess I don’t have much place to judge.” You laughed dryly, then looked over your shoulder. “Why is your cock still hard? How long is this gonna take?” 

Jungkook groaned, clearly annoyed. “Shut up and enjoy the moment.” 

~ 

The so-called moment lasted about two more minutes (which was kind of impressive, you thought) before Jungkook softened and slipped out of you. You hated to admit but you kind of liked the feeling of having him still inside you, completing you as his lips danced around your neck; fingers tenderly playing with your hair. You never thought Jungkook would be so gentle after fucking you like that, but you guessed that you weren’t the only one that was full of surprises. 

Jungkook, apparently, also liked to admire his work. After he had slipped out of you, he made you sit back on the table just so he could stare at his own cum dripping out of you, a glimmer of satisfaction in his dark gaze. He had pushed his white release back inside you and smirked up at you, asking, ever so kindly, for you to go home like that, filled with his cum. 

You, of course, promptly accepted it. 

“By the way,” he called when you two had already stepped out of the church, enveloped by the coldness of the night. There was only one solitary light pole illuminating his features, making him look like one of the saints in the chapel — nothing but fake advertisement, in your opinion. “Wanna know how much I got in that immunology test?”

“How much?” You asked. 

“Eighty two.” Jungkook smiled brightly then, and you found yourself joining him. “Never saw a grade so high in my life. And that counts all the times I’ve cheated too.” 

“Seems like the tutoring sessions are paying off.” You crossed your arms before your chest, the hem of your dress swirling around your knees. The night was weirdly peaceful after everything that had taken place. 

“They are.” He nodded. “I’m looking forward to the next one. Helps that my tutor is kind of a hottie too.”

You scoffed. “So I’ve heard.”  

“And, by the way?” 

“Yeah?”

“You would look better without it.” He pointed at your dress, a sly smile already sprouting on his lips. “Hope to see it next time.”

“Good night, Jungkook.” You rolled your eyes, already turning around — yeah, like there would ever be a next time. 

~ 

BAD INFLUENCE COLLECTION

TAGLIST: 

@taehyungieskith​ @fan-ati--c​ @btstrasht​ @crazy4myself​ @sashimi-mochi @ft-multi @kooafraid @dianaaviny @ggukkieland @cryinginmypromdress @kissestothesky