#I don't trust disney with any queer characters

[sleeperagentclone]

They're gonna butcher my boys :(

[lena-in-a-red-dress]

I wanna talk about Agatha All Along for a minute-- no spoilers. It's been my new fave these days, to the point I'm ravenous for new episodes as soon as I finish one. I've been examining why I enjoy it so much, and I've come up with a couple of things.

It's female led. So often in any media, but marvel specifically in this case, the women are overlooked in terms of screentime and character development. But here we have a roster of strong female characters with distinct personalities and motivations and backstories that are compelling and engaging. I actively want to learn more about them, and when I'm watching them I am wholly engrossing in who they are.

It's largely a standalone. Sure, it spawned from Wandavision, but honestly I don't remember much of it and don't find myself needing to in order to follow what's happening and understanding the plot. Marvel has largely gone stale for me in the sense that I recently haven't seen anything that hasn't needed 10 movies worth of previous story in order to understand. Having something this self-contained is a breath of fresh air.

It's queer. I think we have Disney's official first queer character on screen, and we also have whatever is going on with Agatha and Rio. Love love love it. It feels natural, unforced, and genuine. Less a performance of queerness and instead a simple act of just being queer and loving who you love. Even beyond marvel, that feels rare in and of itself.

Honestly, I can't recommend it enough. If you've been on the fence thus far, or have been holding off because it's yet another Marvel property.... it's worth it, trust me. I was hesitant, but the risk in watching it paid off a hundred fold. I am so into this show guys.

[adamnablelittledevil]

I usually just reblog here and don't speak much, but I've been reading too many different takes on this and wanted to say this. This is a Gothic horror about monsters, yes. You can't watch this show thinking is a Disney animation and they'll be basically perfect all the time. There's murder, physical assault, sexual assault, there will probably be incest at some point and more. Everyone that decides to still watch the show is willingly signing up for it. Nobody is forcing them to watch it, it's their call and they should recognize that. And, yes, the show isn't about moral codes and punitivism. It's about exploring the depths of existence and immortality, how high and deep down they can go, if they're condemned to suffer forever or if they can evolve, forgive each other, forgive themselves and find some sense of peace. If you want characters to be condemned and die for their crimes and mistakes, there wouldn't be anyone left to tell the story. Sure, you can still watch it anyway, because the writing, the acting, the score etc are phenomenal, but know that's not happening and that's never been a promise the cast or crew has ever made. Know that certain wishes for yours won't be granted. You can still have a lot of fun, but you know what to expect and that you'll never be fully satisfied.

That said, this doesn't mean the characters should always get a free pass to do whatever the hell they want and everyone should always accept it either. Even on the show, their actions have consequences, the characters get disappointed, hurt, angry, remorseful etc. They break up. They need to make up for each other and gain their trust back. Yes, they're vampires and their bodies and minds work differently, but they still have pretty human feelings and that conflict is one of the premises of the show. Not to mention how a lot of their problems are pretty human too, and stuff that hit close to home for a lot of individuals, so their audience made of real people will react in different ways. If somebody isn't counting the days to see rape, sexual exploitation, incest or any of these heavy topics, it's their right. They may even have traumas with it and, honestly, they shouldn't reveal their personal stories so people learn how to be sensitive and stop calling them weak or mocking them. But if people don't have problems watching that kind of content, or even like some characters known for such actions (focus on some because I don't know how they'll adapt them and if/how they'll be redeemable), that doesn't necessarily mean they support or do that in real life themselves. Perhaps don't make assumptions about strangers without having a pretty good reason to.

People have their own tastes, experiences, triggers and boundaries and they know what's good for them or not, when they can keep watching something or when they should drop it. And that counts for people of color, women, people who are queer, disabled, neurodivergent, part of any minority and/or have a history of being abused. You may be in one of more of those categories, but other people may react different and have different opinions too. People aren't a monolith. We can talk about it and this should be a healthy place for anybody that feels safe to talk and share their opinions and experiences. But if you ever have an impasse, you can mute, blacklist, block words and people. There's nothing wrong in respecting your own personal boundaries and you should never risk your own peace of mind for something that is supposed to be entertainment. Just don't go to people's Twitter/Tumblr accounts to bother them, change their minds or make insensitive jokes, maybe? It's really not that hard.

[milehighmegs]

Healing Through Fiction

TW: Discussion but not recounting of SA and DV

Also, this is a very personal story, so if you're not comfortable with/don't have the spoons for a stranger's darkest confession, please go now, and with my full understanding.

In the wake of the allegations against NG, I find myself incredibly conflicted re: being a fan of his work, namely Good Omens. Only days before I learned about this, I was taken by an irrepressable urge to watch GO, over & over, and relive all the joy, pain, & bewilderment of the connection between Zira & Crowley. As an AuDHDer, with a smattering of other ND issues thrown in just for funsies (thanks God-or-whatever), seeing both the pure love and the heart-rending conflict between these two ND- and queer-coded characters has given me a deep insight into my own world. This will be long, so bear with me, and it gets a little tangled so I'll do my best to sort out this particular ugly bag of snakes.

[Note: I identify as cishet female, so when I refer to the LGBTQIA+ community in terms of my experience, I do not mean to infer that I'm part of that community. I am, however, a staunch ally & advocate, so please know that none of the reference to nor any language surrounding such reference is intended to be offensive. If at any point I do offend, please accept my apologies and educate me on better ways to address this.]

So.

A number of years ago, as a full-blown adult, I was touched by a family member in a way that family shouldn't be touched. Afterwards, I not only had deep feelings of shame, anger, hatred, & self-loathing, but I also had a dark feeling that something like this had happened to me before. It danced just at the edge of my memory while never stepping fully into the light. But I felt it, deep in my bones. Could I say for certain that I had been molested as a child? No, and I still can't. But I can't shake the feeling. The suspicion that maybe, just maybe, I'd been through this already, when I was too young to process it, thereby shoving it way down in order to bury the corpse of such a horrific experience. And yet its ghost has always haunted me, always been there at the corners of my emotional vision, always sliding up alongside me when things got intimate with all of my partners, no matter how deeply I loved or trusted them.

In addition to a potential traumatic childhood experience, it wasn't known at the time but I am (as mentioned) AuDHD. Because of this, I have a hard time getting to know people at first, but once I see even a hint of reciprocation of friendship, respect, or trust, I unload. And I mean like, UNLOAD. Having spent a vast majority of my life feeling rejected by peers, teachers/adult "authority" figures, even my own family, any sign of acceptance by others is like water in the desert. Alas, because I've come on too strong, it's overwhelming for others (both NT & ND), and it was all an oasis of my own wishful thinking. Again comes the rejection, again comes the self-loathing, lather, rinse, repeat.

Shame spirals really and truly suck.

To escape the harsh reality of my lonely little world, I did what any good "gifted" kid would: I disappeared into books. My favorites were fantasy, or historical fiction/period pieces (think 'Little House on the Prairie' and 'Number the Stars'). When it came to TV, I of course watched cartoons, but my favorite shows were the primetime sci-fi serials that my parents watched, namely Star Trek: The Next Generation and Quantum Leap. I won't get into a huge expose on the impact ST:TNG has had on my life (that's a story for another time), but it IS pertinent to my point (which I SWEAR I'll be getting to eventually!). Movies were especially fun escapes, though I wasn't much of Disney kid. I was (and still am) WAY more into the dark stuff. My top 4 favorite childhood films are 1) The Dark Crystal, 2) The Secret of NIMH, 3) The Neverending Story, and 4) Labyrinth. I also loved (and still love) just about anything Tim Burton. These years would have been prime for me to get into NG's works, but alas, I wasn't to find out about them until I was much older. As I got older, music took a starring role in the dealing-with-my-feelings-via-art arena, especially heavy, loud, frequently angry music. I was the "goth chick" in high school, and I've got the pictures to prove it. I still cherished the stories, shows, & movies from my younger years, but my tastes grew darker & angrier as I found less acceptance among my peers & family as a teenager, and even more pushback from those damned adult "authority" figures. This has continued into my adulthood.

So on that note, and (sorta) rounding back to the title here, stories are my favorite thing in the world because they offer the experience of living someone else's life, or putting yourself into that world and living the life of your choosing, rather than the one that was handed to you and in which you then made choices, not all of them good. Also, stories offer us a chance to be part of something bigger than ourselves because the central point of what I would deem a good story is that it's greater than the sum of its parts. The biggest reason ST and Marvel are my biggest fandoms is because they're primarily about good if flawed people doing their damnedest to set themselves or their differences aside and come together to save the world. While I don't imagine I'll ever be part of something quite that grandiose (but a girl can dream, yeah?), it's still something I've always craved: to be part of a group of people who, even if they aren't saving the world, they're saving each other just by being together. And I don't mean 'saving' in the sense of the broken-wing or savior complexes; I mean they're offering trust, friendship (or more), respect, support, & honesty to one another by accepting each other exactly the way they are BECAUSE of their so-called flaws. They pick each other up off the ground in hard times, and lift each other up onto their shoulders in good ones. They come together to achieve goals that they couldn't without one another, and always share the burden of defeat as well as the fruits of victory.

To put all of this into a somewhat messily wrapped package... Good Omens (and all the fan theories, analyses, and art of such) has been more insightful and liberating for me in terms of my emotional health than my 40+ years of relationships, attempted self-discovery, & shadow work. Watching Zira & Crowley love each other so thoroughly depsite the fact that they're supposed to be ineffable enemies gives me hope that in all my broken, battered, self-loathing ways... maybe I can be loved like that, too. What NG and Sir Terry Pratchett created all those years ago, and what has been brought to life by the brilliant messieurs Sheen & Tennant, is imo the (literal!) greatest love story of all time. The conflicts, their "flaws," and their ultimate acceptance of each other through it all, is the purest form of the deepest love ever in all of fictional creation.

And this is where the conflict comes in.

In addition to my suspicions about previous childhood SA, I spent a good chunk of my teen & earlier adult years being... well, promiscuous. It boils down to a desperate need for acceptance & validation as well as having been starved for physical affection as a child (we are NOT a lovey-dovey family). Sadly, the reality was a string of being used and then rejected, or enduring a continuous, insidious stretch of lies, manipulation, gaslighting, & verbal, even almost physical abuse. One of my former partners came very close to full-on assault, but stopped short of inflicting actual physical pain or damage. This does mean that it does not count. I had to learn that after years of trying to reconcile with what had actually happened.

Following my SA as an adult, I was lost, confused, angry, ashamed, and I dove deep into a well of anger, self-loathing, isolation; I even flirted with a bit of misandry. And could anyone blame me? I was, after all, hurt by a man I had loved & trusted for literally my entire life to that point, and that trust was broken in the worst possible way. Nearly every other time a man had touched me like that had led to pain, shame, & feelings of abandonment. I told myself that men couldn't be trusted, that even though they weren't all That Guy™, I would never know who I was actually dealing with until it was too late. Better to just put up the walls and be done with it altogether. I'm still struggling with this today, with no small amount of cognitive dissonance thrown in thanks to a few ongoing complicated situations in my life. Will I ever really learn? <sigh>

Having found comfort & healing in stories like Good Omens, learning about the allegations against one of its creators (and of other works that I've admired & loved) throws a big giant wrench into this whole thing. What a cruel twist of fate, finding out that someone who created something that had eleviated the pain of my trauma has potentially inflicted that EXACT SAME kind of pain on other people? It's the purest form of conflicted cognitive dissonance I can think of. Ironic that so much of my personal emotional development should come from the work of a person now accused of the thing that gave me the need for recovery in the first place.

As another interesting connection to GO, I feel kinda like Crowley: he was cast out of Heaven, and because of it, he met and developed a defining relationship with Zira, the very person who makes him feel safe, feel loved, and whom he loves in return, knowing that Zira has (almost) always sided with the very people who cast Crowley out in the first place. It's a wicked circle, is it not? So on top of finding healing in the underlying but obvious implications of GO, I identify with one of the lead characters. I also identify with them being "outcasts" (as in outcasts from their respective societies) in terms of their rebelliousness, and their reality-related "otherness" in terms of their queer/nonbinary/gender fluid presentations and ND tendencies. I'm not LGBTQIA+ myself, but I relate to and sympathize with being ignored or actively driven away by people who don't accept me for who I am in my entirety, although this is more related to my ND status (Zira & Crowley are more frequently referred to in the LGBTQIA+ sense than in the ND sense, but it's in the same vein). There's more to this relatability with Crowley in terms of being the "errant child," but that'll go a little too off subject to get into here.

[Again, I don't mean to claim that my ND experience and s**ual trauma are the same as or worse than being ostracized, physically hurt, and/or chronically bullied for being LGBTQIA+. I only mean to draw similarities between my experience and the descriptions & stories of these characters. I ask again that you educate me if I'm in the wrong here.]

So... what IS the point that I SWORE I would get to eventually? Here's the point:

My point is... dolphins. That's my point.

Sorry, couldn't help myself. =)

That healing through fiction & escapism, and the support & artistry of a strong fan community, is valid and helpful, and therefore should be as accepted as traditional therapy. But what do we do when the creator becomes the source of pain for other people? Everyone's answer to this is going to be different, and for different reasons, and EVERY ONE OF THEM IS VALID BECAUSE IT IS PERSONAL. (I will have NO talk of anyone being "wrong" for their opinion on MY blog, so be gone, foul fiends.) I am in the camp of separating the art from the artist, and yet... I can't ignore the accusations against him. I can't ignore the stories of these women, because I know how I felt when I talked about my assault with people I thought would believe & support me. They defended him. Made excuses, tried to blow it off, told me not to talk about it... it was infuriating, and invalidating, and all kinds of other awful shit. I know what these women are going through, so I can't ignore this whole thing outright. But then I turn on 'The Sandman', or scroll through my 'Ineffable' Pinterest board, or see the copy of 'Neverwhere' on my nightstand... it's a fuckin rollercoaster, folks.

If you can relate to any of these experiences and you feel up to sharing, I'd love to hear your story. I know that a cishet woman saying shit like 'I'm a safe space' can induce eye-rolling hard enough to see brain matter, but my intention is the same.

Thanks for getting this far with me, and for being my own safe space. Tumblr, while I'm EXTREMELY late to the party, is my favorite place in the world... next to my own little mental creation of Zira's bookshop, where I peruse the shelves with wonder, cozy up in a big comfy chair, and flip through tomes of ancient wisdom while my cocoa doth grow cold.

-MK

[maryellencarter]

So I've been tussling with how to write this post for some time now.

Uh, the background good news first? I appear to have worked almost an entire pay period and also March is a three paycheck month, so I'm making some very solid progress on getting caught up on my bills, and it seems like this might even continue. I know I tend to be more optimistic than is usually warranted, but 70 hours in my time clock when working all my scheduled hours would put me at 72 is pretty damn impressive, especially compared to how I've been doing for a really long time.

So then I was poking around and trying to figure out what one even does with disposable income. I've been going to a knitting group at a local yarn shop recently (I forget if I mentioned here but a friend was able to get me some KN95 masks and some helpful information about transmission rates so I can socialize safely again! This is probably a big factor in me being less depressed and more worky again also), but I don't really enjoy owning yarn I don't have A Plan for, so right now I've got a cable sweater for Leia, a fancy silk lace scarf, a puffy hexagon blanket, and a crochet baby blanket going, and I just really don't want any more yarn until I finish with one or two of these projects.

Recently, though, as y'all have probably seen, there was an announcement going around about the American Girl doll brand announcing a pair of 1999-themed Historical Character dolls. Because Tumblr is the "we are getting old" website at this point, there were Noises. (They have a Pizza Hut "Book-It" reading program playset. I have never been smacked in the face with nostalgia so hard in my entire life.)

As some of y'all may also remember, I used to have a whole collection of American Girl dolls and furniture and whatnot, because I was trying to do the whole "believe you can be safe and stable now and have the things you were never allowed to have as a kid" thing with a reasonable part of the money I'd inherited from my then recently deceased grandmother (a lovely human being, and by extreme genetic good luck the relative I take after physically, so that I don't have to deal with the whole "growing up to look exactly like my abuser" thing that some people have to suffer through). Then the 2016 election happened, I had a horrible depressive spiral, was unable to work, sold 90% of my collection to pay the rent, eventually became homeless anyway, and lost the other 10% by trusting the wrong person to keep my stuff safe when I had no other options.

ANYWAY! Not the point. The point is that I started poking my nose back into the American Girl website, and then the wiki in order to try to figure out what all I'd missed, and I'm kind of being like "hey, I could hypothetically afford some of this stuff again now".

(I personally find it hilarious that the brand is trying to walk a line between "Addressing trans and nonbinary identities in our helpful book on puberty for preteens? Sure, we'll do that, we're progressive! Also did you say Harry Potter collaboration? That's a license to basically print money from customers who are nostalgic for the same era we were most popular in, let's do this", which is exactly the kind of seesawing I expect from Disney -- who owns American Girl via Mattel.)

So *anyway*, and this is the part of this post I'm really struggling with: I also used to be heavily involved in the part of the American Girl adult collectors fandom that describes itself as "queer-friendly and socially conscious". That part of the fandom runs the wiki (which is an extremely useful and well-constructed resource). I don't know who-all from those days may still follow me on Tumblr, and I'm actually not looking to cause drama, just sort of thinking out loud as I so often do on the tunglrs, but after five years away from the fandom and having poked my nose back in, I'm running into a royal shitton of memories (and a little new information) that's making me go "Holy fuck, this place was *incredibly* toxic, no wonder I got utterly burned out on trying to interact with the dolls and items the way they demanded everybody should. No wonder I still feel like I'm walking on eggshells to even say anything or post a picture related to this fandom."

So. Let's be real. I'm saying "the way they demanded". It's one person, backed up by other mods who don't create their own separate demands. This particular section of the fandom is ruled with an iron fist by one self-described Angry Black Woman who... the very kindest way I can find to describe it is, she's a walking talking demonstration of how you cannot create a single safe space that's safe for everyone. I made a post several years ago that went a little bit viral, where I pointed out that being uncomfortable with a very verbally aggressive black authority figure can actually be because of the "very verbally aggressive authority figure" part, say if you're a survivor of emotional abuse *koff koff*, and doesn't have to mean you're "uncomfortable with black anger" Because You're Racist. That post was a direct reaction to multiple instances of seeing this person tell people "you're pushing back against me being verbally abusive, that's a racist action on your part".

That's the kindest, most nonconfrontational way I can come up with to talk about the situation. Less tactfully, after going to look over the forum rules for this subsection of the fandom -- hoping to realize I'd just been an extremely sensitive tortellini at the time and they weren't that bad, because I know I was an extremely sensitive tortellini in other matters -- in actual fact, I've been reminded very loudly that these rules are a 13k essay on topics such as You Must Be Okay With Verbal/Emotional Abuse If It's Directed At You By People Of Color, All Cultures Of Color Are Closed Cultures Now (So Don't You Dare Put This Black Doll's Clothes On Any Other Doll), and the real kicker for me, Only Selected Queer Identities Are Suitable For Public Discussion (subsection We're Redefining Queerness To Exclude Polyamory, new since I was last here, with sub-subsection Oops We Didn't Mean To Exclude Asexuals Only Those Icky Cishets, and fun guessing game Are We Excluding Aromantics Or Did We Just Forget They Exist, Ask And See If You Get Banned).

I... genuinely didn't mean to go on that long. But this is exactly why I'm making this post. Because I have a *lot* of trauma from trying to figure out what's actually racist or offensive and what's not, while being in a community where anything the main mod doesn't like can suddenly be declared an offense against social justice, and if you ever step on her toes, you're likely to be relegated to the ranks of the damned (aka the white Christian mommybloggers who own more than six white dolls or less than 50% dolls of color). And as probably all of you know, I do a lot of thinking out loud about trauma. Which is a PROBLEM, because this person definitely still follows me here (I don't know who else from the fandom does), and Tumblr blocks don't keep people from seeing your posts, only interacting with them.

So. Uh. There's probably going to be... more of this. I'm making this post now because I'm almost done sewing a doll skirt, I want to show it off here, and I'm also having a really nasty anxiety attack over how this person is definitely going to metaphorically rip it to shreds in the dedicated forum thread for mocking homemade doll clothes (mostly from Etsy) that don't live up to her exacting standards of Historically Accurate Doll Costuming. (The skirt is gathered instead of using 1800s-style "cartridge pleats"! The horror!)

Yeah. So. Um. I guess... if you follow me from when I was last in AG doll fandom, here's where I stand, at least right now. I'm not going to name any names, but you likely know who I'm talking about. I'm not going to go after anybody or cause trouble on their blog, but I'm not going to pull any punches when I'm talking about the ways they and their policies have made me feel unsafe in the fandom. And I'm not going to follow their byzantine rules based on the concept that a single doll can only have one ethnicity and one backstory. A doll, in its essence, is a shapeshifter the way a character actor is a shapeshifter, and not all of us want to create 50+ fixed individual characters that can't wear each other's clothes.

If you can't live with any of that, feel free to go commiserate with each other. I'm not planning to go back to the forum, so don't worry that I'll see anything you say there. (I'm not even planning to publish the rules publicly, since they're not viewable when logged out, although they are a trip and a half to read without the context of the dramas that shaped them.)

If you're scared what will happen to your standing in the fandom if you like my posts or keep following me, though... maybe that's a place to start thinking.

[yippieitsarvensart]

YIPPEE!!!! YOURE SO REAL AND SO VALID I LOVE TALKING HCS WITH PEOPLE AND HEARING THEIR PERSPECTIVES!!

Bring it back to Floyd because I love yo project on him SO MUCH, I like to think that even though he likes clothes and fashion now way more than he did when he first got on land (sensory overload anyone?), he still has certain fabrics/materials he avoids like the plague. Jade and Azul avoid said fabrics as well so he can run up and tackle them at any time without worry of touching the Gross Fabric. Tablecloths and cushions in the lounge were made with this in mind as well.

So sorry Scarabia lovers but I haven't studied Kalim or Jamil under a microscope long enough yet to come to any detailed conclusions, but neither of them are neurotypical that's for sure!!

Also skipping Pomefiore bc they scare me (/j I just don't pay much attention to them personally sjheiddjbdjffb)

I mean Idia is the obvious one, right? He's the most universally agreed on, he literally goes nonverbal regularly and has aids he made with his engineering/programming special interest to accommodate that, like it's just. It's RIGHT THERE ya know? He almost leaves nothing to discuss XDD Him and Riddle are clashing autistics and it's a shame, you hate to see 2 pretty people fight but especially when they're on the same team 😔

And then there's Diasomnia. HOOO BOY is there Diasomnia. Lilia and his gaggle of autistic kids. Starting with Malleus, he also almost leaves nothing to the imagination when it comes to how he is, like?? Idk it's so Right There!!! His special interest is gargoyles obviously, he also has heavy preference/safe foods, he never seems to be on the same page as his peers, leaving Jim to feel isolated and Different, not only does he not fluctuate his tone so people can't tell when he's joking, he can't hear tone to tell when other people are joking so it's just miscommunication after miscommunication. He enjoys learning now things but prefers the company of his most trusted people, that or either quite isolation in a dim/dark area to decompress!! He's the type of guy who doesn't realize he's been overstimulated for like 6 hours until he gets to his room and lays down and it hits him all at once and he's like OH! Oh THAT'S why I felt like shit and wanted to smite everything and everyone. Okay, cool.

Idk if this will make sense to anyone else but like, Silver is Disney princess coded, right? And Disney princesses are autistic coded in small ways, right? Yeah. Yeah that's really the only way I can explain it SKSBAIKSDHHD but like!! I know I'm right okay!!!! As a very very sleepy autistic person I just KNOW, I see him and I know. Also animals love him which like, understanding animals better than you understand if someone is trying to deceive/take advantage of you? Idk dude, that's pretty autistic /silly

Sebek is tough because I havent fixated on him at ALL and have like none of his cards, but the BIG STRONG INTENSE EMOTIONS and lack of volume control and how he's apparently actually very emotional/sensitive, and how he likes to stick to his routine and his people and anything that interferes will be YELLED AT ACCORDINGLY!!!! Idk, I don't really know this man (yet) so I also can't fully explain my vision here XD

Also, everything is platonic unless specified otherwise btw!! Yuri Jeizu is so canon, but to me the octotrio is like, SO queer platonic coded so I almost always just default to that akshsksndhf

It's nearly 4 in the morning and I'm going INSANE, like there's 8+ rambles I could send you about queer/identity headcanons and ships!!! I haven't even STARTED on the side characters yet, I have so much fuel in this hyperfixation fire!!! Also if you literally ever want me to stop for whatever reason let me know and I will, no hard feelings akdvejskfh, I know answering a lot of asks can be A Lot

PLEAS ENEVER STOP unless you run out of things to talk on !!!!!!!!!! this is so in-depth I'm reading and nodding like yes yes I get this I GET YOU... Also literally same with Scarabia LOLLL I skipped most of the story... sorry Scarabia stans... I literally only paid attention when the octatrio was around.. skull emoji!!

And actually answering tons of asks ain't that hard for me right now, I'm full of writing energy because I've been working on an AU between twst and another franchise I'm #insane about >_< (I've been trying so keep it at a not insane level of detail because I know I'll focus too hard on certain characters but I also desperately need feedback on it... NOT THAT I'M ASKING RIGHT NOE THOUH I'm just complaining aha) (unless.... unless..........)

Floyd finding an interest in fashion (especially shoes) is something I forget often for some reason, I think it's because I also hc that Floyd hate hate HATESS the feeling of clothes (just fuckin' all kinds of clothes, he especially hates having multiple layers of all different kinds of clothing items on at once) against his skin, so that's why his uniform is never on properly...

I can't talk a ton about lots of other dorms bc I'm so not deeply invested in at least half the entire cast HSAHHAJKFDJ but you are so incredibly real and right I'm shaking /pos

If it's 4am bestie boo you should probably sleep and save the ranting for tmr!!!! or don't, and just keep slaying here LMAOO I'm in a discord server SPECIFICALLY for twst hcs and I'm THIS close to c+psting a bunch of this into there (or just sharing the post I DONT KNOW) cuz it's SO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!

[zorilleerrant]

honestly, I don't think it's possible to queerbait anymore. no one is so hard up for queer media they're willing to watch something they hate for the merest glimmer of a tacit acknowledgement that queer people exist. they might be upset that a movie or show isn't queer enough, but if they're still watching, they're watching for reasons other than hoping it will someday mention queer people.

now it's not like you can't use this phenomenon at all. something can still advertise on the premise that it includes asians, and people will absolutely show up to ten seasons for four episodes with an asian character in the background, even if they're not named and don't have any lines. people will watch a shitty awful show just for starring someone in a wheelchair. people will flock to a movie with an explicitly autistic character played by an autistic actor.

but there are so many shows and movies with explicitly queer characters now that people can choose by genre where they want their queer representation. they can choose by tones of shows they prefer. they can follow actors they like and avoid actors they dislike; they can even pick writers and directors they trust to create a good story. if it's not good, they're not stuck with it, because there are other options out there, even without diving into indie content.

it's easy to find a gay or lesbian character, and easy to find a gay or lesbian relationship. it's easy to find a bi character and easy to find one in a stable relationship with either a man or a woman or one that's casually dating/sleeping around. it's harder to find trans and nonbinary characters, but by no means virtually unheard of. plenty of works in plenty of forms and genres just have those. popular ones that everyone's heard of, too.

like, even with Disney's repeated First Gay Characters, did anyone actually shell out money just for that? because I think it was mostly people who were interested already disappointed in something they would've been disappointed in whether or not it was advertised. because they would've watched it anyway.

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

Maybe I'm being cynical, but you're not gonna get a Spiderman 2 moment with that.

Most of the diehard monarchists in Britain do not give a shit about gay rights, at best. A lot of them actively oppose it. Plus we saw what happened to Meghan Markle; can you imagine if Harry wasn't just dating a person of colour, but a man of colour? The absolute best they'll get is a "if you don't like it, leave the monarchy" from that group. Realistically, Piers Morgan is gonna go on a tirade about how the royal family are being forced to "go woke", and Alex is going to bear the brunt of that backlash and be hounded every day online by the insane people who think Piers Morgan isn't just a sad, lonely bellend.

And most queer people in Britain don't like the monarchy because 1) queer people are more likely to have leftist politics and therefore oppose the monarchy considering the everything they've done that they're still actively benefiting from, and 2) queer folks in Britain won't ever forgive them for the way they treated Diana and the fact that they also probably had her killed.

Like Diana is a queer icon in Britain because during the AIDS crisis, she went and visited patients and held their hands, and was a respected public figure at the time. She established trusts and led fundraising campaigns both to help patients and for research. She used her platform and significance to help queer folks in the 1980s when Thatcher was in. And Diana was then wildly mistreated by the Royals in return. Even today, a lot of queer people - myself included - would never forgive the monarchy for that, even taking away every other awful thing they've done.

They're hardly going to go protest in the streets for a guy actively benefitting from an institution that he can leave at any point. It's not like he'll be out on the streets with no option if he leaves the monarchy. Just sell your exclusive story to whichever newspaper offers you the most. You'll get plenty. Like queer activists who organise marches and protests are not going to focus on Henry when trans British folks can seek refugee status in Aotearoa because of the dangers we face here.

And I'm not saying there isn't an overlap between the above groups because there is a definite overlap between the people who like and care about the monarchy and gays and/or allies of the gays, but it's a small overlap filled with people who have absolutely no idea how to organise a protest and often no desire to protest, as well as people who still consume anything Joanne Rowling puts out whilst whining about how all these trans people are so mean to them! Like these people will sell out their allyship or their fellow queers just so they can stan their favourite author of an enjoyable yet unoriginal fantasy series; they'll happily do the same so they can stan the fucking monarchy. You might get some grumbling about how this isn't right, but any actual protests would be small and ineffectual.

I can see someone painting that mural though. I don't think Casey McQuinn (is that their name?) did it purposefully because this is a tone deaf earnest book, but Han and Leia is such a good choice considering 1) it's an iconic heterosexual couple and b) characters from a tentpole IP owned by fucking Disney.

Like there's a big overlap between Disney Adults and gays/allies who would unironically say "yas queen" when referring to Queen Elizabeth Windsor/Queen Belizabeth Royal-Blue, and you cannot convince me otherwise.

one of my mutuals is apparently a rwrb fan because i just opened the app and my dash was just gifset from the movie after gifset from the movie after gifset from the movie.

and i find myself staring at each of them remembering your post about it earlier this year because wow it really doesnt explore either american or british politics nor the monarchy, huh?

like im staring at this henry bloke like oh you have a very high bar - probably like 22,000 feet high or so - to clear for me to not hate you in principle, let alone root for you.

it feels very tone deaf and i really dont understand how people are able to turn their brains off for it.

Kai I'm so glad I have the opportunity to ask you this because when I was reading the book I went "hmm, this seems pretty silly, but I'm too American to know for sure," so let me pose this question to you:

if it were revealed (by Evil American Politicians) that one of the lesser princes was a.) gay and b.) in a secret relationship with the US president's son and c.) his evil queen grandma (not That Queen, but she's written as a very obvious pastiche of That Queen) was pressuring him to stay closeted

what are the odds that the people of England would, hypothetically, take to the streets protesting for him to be allowed to be openly gay? and even more specifically, what are the odds that someone would paint an enormous mural of him and his American boyfriend as Han and Leia from Star Wars? like purely hypothetically

[edalynn]

huntlow shippers say its pretty much confirmed they'll be canon and i do see some of their arguments. blushing is used as shorthand for romantic feelings so it makes sense for some to interpret hunter blushing as a crush. and to make it more balanced shippers then look at scenes of them interacting and stretch the logic a bit to argue that willow also has a crush (though i absolutely don't see it lol).

but i feel like the crew is more teasing the fans with the ship than actually foreshadowing that it would happen in the story, you know? they go out of their way to avoid any actual conversation between hunter and willow after their first episode together. and even though hunter is given the "romantic" shorthands willow is given none.

in that one stream when someone asked if the ship would happen dana found it rly funny and reacted like they were going to tease the fandom with something unexpected. and they can't kill off one half of the ship bc that would go against the vibe of the story and hunter and willows character arcs. but if they're just going to make them canon then it's weird that dana would have such a big reaction to it. i would have just expected a cryptic smile and a "stay tuned ;DDD"

same with that one promo art of thanks to them with huntlow holding hands like if they do get together why would you show that on a piece of promo art? especially for an episode where they don't get together? it would have been more impactful if they just let it happen in the show without alluding to it in the promos. they definitely didn't do that for lumity or raeda. same thing with some other promo arts where huntlow are standing next to each other or that one where hunter is looking at willow.

i can buy that hunter has a crush but i can't see willow having one, or them getting together in a well-written way. im really hoping they go with the "willow rejects hunters love confession" route bc they haven't had a conversation in almost 10 episodes and i trust the crew to write romantic relationships better than that. i hope the crew's push for the huntlow ship is just a big troll on their part (although it would be kind of mean to huntlow shippers if it was just a troll)

The whole belief that it’s “confirmed canon” is honestly my biggest gripe with huntlows because the ones that insist it is canon are the ones that come after people that don’t ship it, as if there haven’t always been people in fandom spaces that actively ignore actual canon ships anyway. It’s definitely frustrating because blushing is often used as romantic shorthand, but toh has down an amazing job from day one of showing characters blushing at people they look up to or admire with absolutely no romantic context (I.e. Willow at Luz, or Luz at Eda which is CLEARLY one of awe and admiration) so I think if they pull the rug out from under shippers and have it said or implied “it was because he looked up to her the whole time, not romantic!” It would be very on brand and also hilarious. And if it IS a crush, I’m going to decide to ignore canon and say Hunter has very little social skills and has no idea what just admiring and wanting to be a person’s friend feels like so he thinks it’s romantic attraction lol. In the other hand with Willow, she clearly has no romantic interest in him whatsoever. As I said before, we’ve seen Willow blush and it’s only ever been in a platonic sense (aroace Willow 👀) so if that’s shippers’ marker for romantic attraction she definitely is NOT interested in him in that way.

I definitely agree with you that it feels like a tease, and it would definitely be Dana’s MO for a show she’s so heavily laden with queer rep for the straight “couple” to get the usual queerbait treatment. It would feel like a fuck you to Disney and every other show that has made queer ppl the butt of their jokes for so many years and I think that’s beautiful. Also im so glad you think the same thing about that stream. I’ve said the EXACT same thing in the past- that reaction was definitely not a blushy uwu my pairing reaction that was the reaction of a person that has some shit up her sleeve in regards to the question lmfao. Dana hasn’t reacted that way visibly about lumity OR raeda which she later in the same stream said was her favorite ship, so reacting that way to a ship that’s not even canon and that fans are constantly theorizing about seems SO un-Dana terrace to me. Like I cannot stress enough how much that would not make sense lmao.

I haven’t seen the promo art of them holding hands??? Kind of glad I haven’t seen it? But yeah, the way they’re always looking at each other in promo art. It definitely seems like a tease, though because none of those episodes have really had them interacting at all. I genuinely cannot see how they could produce a well written romance like you said even before this last episode, but ESPECIALLY now after this last episode. It would feel cheap and like they’re using a romance as the thing to heal hunter after all the trauma he’s gone through. With flapjack, you know,, and being the most important thing in Hunter’s life, it feels they’ve narratively gone too far for huntlow to end up being anything more than a “sure your best friend might have died to save your life, but you’re all better now because the girl said yes :)” type deal. It makes me feel kinda sick thinking about it because it would feel disrespectful to everything he’s just gone through. Hunter needs time to grieve and re-find himself, the thought of him having any romantic feelings for anyone/a crush on anyone after what happened wouldn’t make sense. Like “oh yeah that was traumatizing, but potential romance!!”. Like it would be shelving all the trauma he now needs to process and make flapjack’s sacrifice feel so cheap because I cannot see hunter having any interest in anything like that anymore directly after that’s happened. When people are traumatized like that they tend to close off, emotions shut down, etc (not to say that’s exactly what will happen, but it narratively makes sense after all that with how we already know hunter acts) and wouldn’t actively be thinking about a romance but would more likely be distancing himself. I swear to god if we get a scene of the hexsquad and camila of hunter explaining being a grimwalker/what all happened and it ends with him blushing at Willow because she for once ever does something romantic back or just hugs him or something I will snap because like I said it would make it feel like flapjacks sacrifice is being pushed to the wayside just to further a random ship that barely has any canon evidence. It already would have felt cheap to make it canon before, but it REALLY would now. That being said, I agree with you that I trust that if they were going to end up romantic the crew would have done much better writing for it rather than it feeling like a constant tease AND I trust Dana to handle the aftermath of all the shown physical abuse Hunter just experienced better than to make huntlow canon to “fix him”. The amazing quality of writing for lumity and raeda really doesn’t lend high hopes for huntlow actually becoming canon & I hope it stays that way for the sake of the writing.

[thetreetopinn]

When the queer leftist atheist goes to a conservative thanksgiving

I am very tired.

It has been a very long day.

Mostly because I spent the last 48 hours helping my mother with 90% of all of the preparations for Thanksgiving--prepping something like ten items for everyone to eat--as well as clean up, organizing, table-setting, 5-year-old wrangling, etc.

But I am also very tired because of my brother-in-law.

See, they say something you should never talk about at Thanksgiving is politics, and fucking hell let me tell you what--I know that all too well. I'm the black sheep of the family when it comes to my politics. I have learned well to not say SHIT if I can help it. I will end up getting dog-piled on.

So yeah, keep my mouth shut, don't start nothin', won't be nothin'.

And then my brother-in-law looks me dead in the eye and asks me "Hey, do you have any bitcoin?"

That was how it started.

I replied with "No, I stay as far away from anything crypto-related as I possibly can."

He wanted to talk about his favorite sports personalities getting shafted by the crypto-crash and thought I'd be sympathetic.

I am not. Not in the slightest.

"They knew what they were getting into when they bought into an unregulated financial speculation instrument. It is a scam. Nothing more, nothing less. They're trying to speedrun every financial crisis that has happened since the great depression, and it looks like they succeeded."

He promptly shut up.

Preparations continue, discussions are had, there's a video that he and my sister are confused about because their kid is way into it, and they're not doing the picosecond of googling to find out what it is, so I do the hard work for them, find out it's inappropriate for someone so little, and they ban him from watching it. Brother-in-law starts going off on a mini-rant about media:

"It's gotten so bad you don't know who to trust, not even Disney, they're trying to brainwash kids."

I want to jump in. Oh fuck do I want to jump in so god damned badly. Holy shit do I want to just clap back with "Oh yeah? Brainwashing them how? EXACTLY? Is it be an even more ardent and fanatical devotee of the mouse so they will be excited to consume more product? Then yes, I agree. If you say the world 'woke' at all, then no, because Disney is absolutely not work. They axe shit all the time because it's "too woke" and queerbait constantly."

But I don't. I don't give him the rundown of what happened with the now deposed CEO who elected to not advertise the children's animated film that has an openly gay lead character so it would fail and use that as justification to axe more queer stories. I keep my fucking mouth shut.

We do the usual prayer around the table--as an atheist, I'm surprised I don't burst into flames--and while we're eating... my brother-in-law starts asking me about Mars.

"Do you think we'll ever get to Mars?"

Now... I know EXACTLY where this is going. I know PRECISELY who he wants to talk about. I know SPECIFICALLY where he wants to drive the subject... but I don't let him.

See, I'm a fucking space nerd and I can talk CIRCLES around the subject he wants to bullseye without ever straying into that maelstrom. Yes I know I'm mixing my metaphors. I don't care.

We have a legitimately decent discussion about the difficulties of spaceflight and traveling to another world and how NASA has provided so much spin-off technology and the actual benefits of having a human space flight program... even though he's trying--TRYING HIS DAMNEDEST--to bait me into something more provocative, whether he means it intentionally or not.

He sees he's not gonna get me this time and the discussion dies down.

Hours later, we're watching a movie, the credits roll, and I swear to you... completely unprovoked, not even mentioned anywhere in the film, nothing. Completely and utterly out of the blue:

"What are your thoughts on Jordan Peterson?"

Okay, sit down boo... we gonna have a FUCKIN' CHAT 'cause I got thoughts, feelings, and emotions.

You wanna go there? Let's go there. There is no FUCKING way he didn't know that was going to cause a problem. Peterson is too polarizing a figure. So I lay it on him as politely and gently as I can.

"I don't like him. He pushes a lot of wrong-headed ideology. He is a liar and a charlatan who has messianic thinking."

Hooo boy... turns out my brother-in-law is a Jordan Peterson stan.

Fucking great.

He starts in on the bullshit about making misgendering someone a crime you can be imprisoned for. I rebut with "no it's not, that's a lie"

He comes back with "I don't know where you get your information from" and "Just look it up, get out your phone and look up Jordan Peterson C-16"

So I fucking do, right there, in front of him.

In less than 30 fucking seconds, I find a legitimately credible source that says "No, Peterson is full of shit, it's not a crime, you can't be sent to jail for using the wrong pronouns" and I say "So he lied... like a liar."

And of course... because it runs counter to the narrative he wants to believe, he laughs derisively and dismisses me. I counter with "oh by the way, if you wanna come at me with that guy who was held in contempt for misgendering his child? That didn't happen either. He was held in contempt because the judge explicitly said to not discuss the matter of the court case in public, and he went and did that... even tried to raise money off of it. The judge slapped him with 'you were told explicitly not to do that, and you went and did it anyway"

Brother-in-law's response...

"Ah."

Just... fucking hell.

To my sister's credit, she saw where this was going the MINUTE he said the name "Jordan Peterson" and started packing everything up to haul the family home. She knew her husband was baiting me, she knew he was doing it all fucking day, and he finally got me to take that bait.

They left, and it was just me and my parents.

I apologized to them for getting argumentative, but it's something that's deeply important to me, to fight back against those false narratives that have gotten people killed--RECENTLY.

There was a... 'discussion' to be had, and my parents trotted out the same, tired centrist talking points "How do we get back to where we can just have a normal, civilized conversation and respect each other even if we disagree?"

THIS IS NOT SOMETHING YOU CAN RESPECT

PUSHING THE DANGEROUS AND LIFE-THREATENING MISINFORMATION PETERSON AND HIS ILK PUSH ABOUT TRANS PEOPLE GETS THEM--AND QUEER PEOPLE IN GENERAL--KILLED. YOU DO NOT POLITELY ARGUE WITH THAT.

You try to gently educate if you can. You provide documentation and sources and evidence if possible. But you do. not. DEBATE. This is not a discussion.

My dad whips out this "When I was your age or younger I too had a lot of really strong opinions. I felt like my opinion was the most important one and everyone should agree with me."

And I stomped down HARD on that shit:

"I'm sorry... is that what you think of me? Do you really think I believe my opinion is the most important one? If that's what you genuinely think then we need to have a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT discussion."

It took me 30 god damn minutes to get both my mom and my dad to come around to the simple idea of "this isn't just a difference of opinion, this is pushing back against dangerous misinformation that gets people killed" and even then... they clearly didn't fully get where I was coming from.

My mom brought up "well I hear all this hateful stuff from the LGBTQIA+ whatever community"

"What hateful stuff, specifically? I wanna address it."

"Well... all this... you know... they force little kids to have surgery-"

"That doesn't happen. That is a lie. No doctor will perform gender affirming surgery on anyone under 18. And HRT, they will not provide that if you're 12 or younger. If you're talking about puberty blockers, those are completely safe and reversible--even though getting them is extremely difficult. You can't just go to the doctor and ask for them and boom... your child suddenly has HRT and new genitals. It takes YEARS sometimes just to take the first step--EVEN FOR ADULTS."

"Then why do politicians keep saying it?"

"They lie. They lie to keep you afraid. To keep you hating the 'right' kind of people. To keep you whipped up and voting for them. That's why."

Mom didn't like that. I don't know if she accepted it or not.

When I asked her point blank "Do you think gay and trans people should be allowed to exist with the same rights as straight and cis people?" she DID say that she does think they should.... so... at least her heart is in the right place I guess.

I didn't hear an answer from my dad on the point.

But they really REALLY wanted to make it sound like it was MY fault for rising to my brother-in-law's bait. Motherfucker was TRYING, and god damn did he fucking succeed.

Mom trotted out the "Whatever you wanna do in your own home, that's fine. I just don't want it in my face."

That's when I started talking about representation in media, how straight cis people are EVERYWHERE... from a queer perspective, heteronormativity is shoved in THEIR faces from every angle.

I went on to talk about the Hayes Code, which neither of them had heard about, the 'bury your gays' trope, the fact that the queer community loves Disney villains like Jafar, Ursula, Scar, etc. because of queer coding

Because "well if this is the only representation we get, then we'll take it and make it our own"

I told them about Strange World and how the former CEO tries to bury it because of his raging homophobia.

My mom was shocked... ACTUALLY SHOCKED... about the queer coding of Disney villains.

"That's wild... I never saw them like that, they were just bad guys in Disney movies to me."

"Yeah... exactly my point. You don't see it. Queer people do. And if you can only see yourself in the villain... what's that say? That tells you that's what the world sees you as."

I went on with: "Why is it that when we see a little boy and a little girl being boyfriend and girlfriend in movies and what not, it's cute and innocent, but if it's a little boy and a little boy or a little girl and a little girl, it's suddenly SEXUALLIZED!? Why isn't the little boy and the little girl seen as sexual?"

Neither mom nor dad could answer.

Eventually, it came back to: "How do we get back to having rational, civilized discussions again?"

"I don't know, but as long as a person's right to exist is up for debate, there is no civil discourse to be had. It's either you get to have rights, or you don't, and one of those is fascism."

I can see their desire to want to do the right thing, to be okay with people different than themselves... but they've just swallowed so much bullshit propaganda over the years, and they continue to. I don't know if I reached my dad. I feel like maybe I reached my mom. We don't fully agree on abortion--like, she is concerned for the life of the innocent or whatever wording she actually used, but she damn sure doesn't like the idea of the government having a say in what you can and can't do with your body.

At least we are in full agreement on that front. I tried to frame that as 'right to privacy'... but then she brought it straight back over to the vaccination card.

*LOUD, ANGRY, QUEER, LEFTIST SIGH*

"A woman's right to chose to get an abortion does not affect the life of a person she bumps into at the store. Whether or not she is vaccinated can kill that same stranger--and has killed people. I am 100% in favor of everyone having personal liberties and freedoms... but the very second your personal liberty results in someone else's death--some random person you ran into at the store or on the street... that's when it becomes something else entirely"

We also had a discussion about abortion--about when they happen the most, about why someone gets a late-term abortion, about how there are so many potential carve-outs that the government ought to allow that I just said "at that point, why do all this fucking means testing? Just give them abortion care. They're already going through enough heartbreak as it is, just let them make their choice and not be judged or criminalized for it."

There wasn't a response after that.

Dad started turning up the volume on the TV at a certain point. I think he was fucking done with me. And you know what? That's fine. I don't need his approval. I don't need his blessing. I don't even need him to fucking agree with me.

People should have the right do what they want with their own bodies. If he disagrees with that, then he's in favor of state regulated bodily control, and that's fucking fascism.

Yes, that does mean I have to be in favor of a good many things that I might disagree with--like surgically altering yourself to look like a cat... yeah, that weirds me out... but whatever, it's your body. Do what you want with it.

You wanna smoke or chew or dip or whatever? I'm not particularly fond of it, and I have some VERY strong feelings about the tobacco industry... but... it's your body. Just don't force ME to breathe your second hand smoke. I already have enough respiratory issues. It comes back to that whole personal liberties affecting another person thing.

God I'm so fucking tired.

There are so many other, better educated, better practiced, better tempered people who can handle this kind of discussion.

I hate having to be a queer elder for my own fucking family when I came to the community so late in life... especially when I have literally zero support among them.

"You just get so... so... mad."

"YEAH... BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE LITERALLY DYING BECAUSE OF THIS SHIT. WHY AREN'T YOU MAD!??!"

I think I may have to take a pass on meeting up with everyone for Christmas. If this is the direction it's gonna go again... I'm not sure I can handle it. My brother-in-law clearly wants to bait me into this shit and I don't have it in me to stay out of it.

I hope everyone had a better thanksgiving than this.

Love and solidarity.

Trans rights. Gay Rights. Reproductive Rights. Black Lives Matter. Land Back. All of this good stuff.

I just don't have the strength to handle all of it all of the time, and the world seems content to force me to do so more often than I'm able.

I could use a hug.

[vampibrainrot]

Devin Grayson made a new statement where she talks about Yelena's sexuality. As a comic fan and aroace person, I will be talking about my impressions of what she (Devin) said.

Before I start, I want to clarify a few things:

1) I will break this into pieces and be as clear as possible, but english isn't my first language and there's a lot to be said.

2) I am not trying to put words in anyone mouth or change the context of what have been said. I will only talk about MY point of view of this whole situation as an aroace. I'm leaving the links at the end so anyone can read and make their own conclusions

3) I'm not here to argue and will not do it. Don't waste your time trying. If you want to discuss the matter in a friendly and respectful way, then it's different and obviously I'm open to hear what you have to say

4) I don't speak for all the aroace community. As any other group of people, we have different experiences and opinions. What I think it's not necessarily the same of what someone with other experiences think. If you want to support us, hear as many aroaces as you can. Just let us have a voice.

Okay, know talking about what I'm here for: a few days ago, Devin made a new post on her blog where she talks about Yelena's sexuality and how she (Yelena) would approach it. She spoke about her thoughts on the matter and also her contract with Marvel/Disney.

This is one of the first things that she says about Yelena. At first, she never thought about her romantic life or sexuality simply because it wasn't relevant. But years later, when asked about Yelena's sexuality, Devin said that made sense for Yelena to be ace, which makes total sense since Yelena never had shown interest (both sexually and romantically) in anyone. In Black Widow (2001), her aunt Olga tried very hard to get her a date and she refused every single time or made excuses to not go.

Then Devin explains about the situation of queer people in Russia and how this affects Yelena's see herself. The important thing here is that she makes clear that Yelena might not had known about labels like "asexual" and "aromantic" and if she ever questioned her own sexualiaty, she would keep to herself.

Going back to the famous panel where she says "I'm not anything". Considering the circumstances she lives in, makes sense for her to say that she ain't anything when asked about her sexuality. I myself have said this before I knew what asexuality and aromantic was, that's the reality for many aroaces and is part of our experience of discovering ourselves

After talking about Yelena, she explained her situation with Marvel/Disney. Legally, she doesn't own or has a say on anything related to Yelena and Marvel may have different plans for the character

But if Marvel didn't wanted the association of the character with the aroace community, then they wouldn't put the article from where this quote come from on their on web site. Obviously, this doesn't mean that Marvel will just make Yelena say the words "I'm aroace" anytime soon (unless if it's financially good for them)

She ends the article saying that she supports all headcanons (and too people don't trust or rely on multimillionaires corporations and much less sign contracts), but in MY point of view, supporting someones opinion isn't the same as not having one, specially in her case when she's exposed to attacks from fans and all.

Conclusion: at the end of the day, things stays quite the same. We need to keep fighting for aroace Yelena and hopefully, Marvel might do something (again, big corporation, so it's definitely nothing explicit like saying "I'm aroace", but something more subtle, like Nadya/Wasp saying she not interested in " teenage things")

The links:

Devin's article:

http://www.devingrayson.net/devingraysonblogish/yelenas-sexuality?s=09

Interview on Marvel's website:

[shakespearean-snape]

So, as far as I know "incel" wasn't really a thing in the 90s when the books were published so this one always confuses me because it's not like there were known "incel" red flags or characteristics JKR would have had on hand to write into Snape's character if her aim had been to create a problematic male allegory for incels and their philosophies.

Of course predatory men have always been in the conscience of women. It's something little girls have to learn about at a very young age. The problem is that a lot of the canon material I've seen pointed to as evidence of Snape being an incel doesn't hold up to any real scrutiny.

Particularly troubling to me out of those is the scene of a very young child Snape first meeting Lily. I find more to be concerned with in the fan interpretation and what people are seeing to assign any sort of sexual connotations to the actions of a nine-year-old-boy than I do Snape's actions there.

There's also the whole complicated matter of the villain tropes JKR threw at Snape to try to throw readers off to where his allegiances were. Unsurprisingly a lot of those come from a tradition of fiction stereotyping marginalized and casting us as the villain.

So while I know that isn't the intention of a lot of the "Snape is an incel" posters, I have to wonder how much of their reaching to ascribe this characteristic to Snape of the "the hypersexual, aggressively predatory male" isn't also a case of them unconsciously reacting to those tropes and their complicated relationship to racial, ethnic, and lgbtqa+ groups being portrayed as deviant and connecting-dots without very much critical-thinking about why Snape as he is written triggers that kind of revulsion and easy rejection of anything other than predatory, deviancy.

So many members of the lgbtqa+ community and people of color are used to seeing themselves written into villain tropes in popular fiction and cast as hyper-aggressive, more primal or deviant and predatory. I mean, just about every Disney villain from the 90s into the 00s drew heavily from queer stereotypes or tropes. In popular anime/cartoons we have the likes of Pegasus from YuGiOh, Jesse and James from Pokemon, or Frieza, Zarbon, and Cell in Dragon Ball Z or even General Blue in classic Dragon Ball and HIM from the Powerpuff Girls.

Probably every 80-90s kid that grew up watching anime and cartoons learned the general rule of: If the character has a fancy sounding accent, a large vocabulary and they're flamboyant they're going to be the villain. Then we have characters like Heathcliffe in Wuthering Heights who is basically a dark skinned man described as driven by his wild, primal passions that refuse to be tamed and he's made dangerous and sometimes violent because of it.

Lgbtqa+ people and people of color are often sexualized in fiction but not in a good way, it's always evidence of our deviance and danger and a warning to white/straight readers why they should stay away.

The tropes JKR used are basically the same ones writers before her used and built up on a tradition of white people don't trust "x group" and here's why but written into fiction in inexplicit ways that are more sinister for being subtle.

So when I see Snape being sexualized even as young as nine by some of the "Snape is an incel" people I have to wonder if those tropes are not partly influencing it and people unconsciously pick up off them and carry them to the conclusion they have always been led to associate with those tropes. That this character being so strongly telegraphed by JKR as part of that "other" is one we should all be wary of because he must be some kind of predatory villain on the prowl.

They read Snape as a child and don't see a child. They read him as a teenager and don't see how Lily's friendship with him could have been mutual and she ends up cast as the victim. Another middle-class white woman being preyed on by the deviant.

I do at least think this could be some of the problem. I also think some of the "Snape is an incel" posters may not have very much firsthand experience with these kind of men and have only read the conversations about the most surface-level behaviors to watch for which they connect to Snape without really understanding how they fall apart under any real scrutiny (especially if the real agenda is more driven by our pack mentality tendencies and want to divide ourselves into clearly delineated factions, so because they're "team Marauders" they need to validate why in a way that also seems to signal their values as a group and as individuals and making Snape into an incel makes that very convenient because ha! he's problematic and our favorite characters/ships aren't we win!).

There may also be some who HAVE had very bad experiences with these kind of men and are hypersensitive to even the slightest indications so even if Snape doesn't hold up as an incel type when you put the argument to the test emotionally that doesn't matter because they've made the connection and trauma associations don't come from a place of logic understandably and most with trauma don't want to just sit and have "an objective" discussion about it.

I'm a sociologist so I always try to look at all possible reasons for the behaviors of people and why we do the things we do.

Severus does seem the type, doesn’t he?

 

“Severus?” Quirrell laughed, and it wasn’t his usual quivering treble, either, but cold and sharp. “Yes, Severus does seem the type, doesn’t he? So useful to have him swooping around like an overgrown bat. [HP&PS]

 

I think a lot of problems with how many HP fans percieve Snape stem from the type of person he seems to be.

As a teenager he’s a skinny, awkward nerd who hangs out with the wrong crowd and is fascinated by a dangerous ideology. He seems to be an archetypal nerd and incel fascinated by neonazism. A lot of ideas who Snape is, what his motivations are and so on, stem from not the source material but the archetype he seems to match.

The thing is, while he has a lot in common with this archetype, there are also significant differences. Without them Snape wouldn’t have betrayed Voldemort and become a spy, he would have stayed a loyal DE or another Karkaroff. This is important thing about Snape: he seems the type, but he is not the type.

Lily and Snape’s friendship wasn’t an awkward situation where Lily was a kind girl who sometimes talked to the local nerd out of pity and Snape jumped to the wild conclusions that they were best friends now. Lily truly liked him and they were real friends, not just in his head.

Was he jealous of James? Most likely he was, but he had a real reason to worry about Lily. James was a bully, Snape also believed James knew about “the Prank” beforehand. Would Snape have reacted in the same way if a genuinly nice boy like Cedric Diggory had been interested in her? We don’t know, but we can’t be sure that he would have reacted equally negatively. A jealous incel would have done that, but it’s not enough to be sure that Snape would have too.

After Snape called Lily a Mudblood, he sincerely apologised. An archetypal incel would have tried to put the blame on James and on external circumstances, he would have tried to gaslight Lily. An incel has a victim mentality: he’s not the one to blame, others are. But Snape did none of those things.

Snape didn’t feel entitled to Lily’s attention, he was her friend. She liked him and talked to him willingly. After Lily ended their friendship and told him to stay away, he did. He respected her wishes. An archetypal incel wouldn’t have listened, would have tried to contact her afterwards and felt entitled to her attention just because they used to talk. Snape did not, he left her alone as she wanted.

Snape was never friendzoned, because he had never asked Lily out. There is even no proof that he was in love with her romantically. Personally I think he had a crush on her, but her friendship was most important to him. I guess he didn’t want to lose it and waited for some signs that Lily had feelings for him too. Having an unrequited crush on somebody isn’t a crime, people don’t control it. An incel would have expected a romantic relationship in exchange for being nice. Snape respected Lily’s feelings and didn’t expect anything from her.

When he found out that Voldemort thought the Prophecy concerned Harry Potter, he asked Voldemort to spare Lily’s life. He could have asked him to Stupify her so he could have made her his sex slave. He could have Obliviated her so that she wouldn’t have remembered her family, he could have given her a love potion. It would have been so easy. According to Hagrid, Voldemort had wanted to recruit her before, so he surely would’ve been on board, wouldn’t he? But Snape after initial, emotional impulse to beg for her life didn’t come with such a plan. He went straight to Dumbledore, even though he could have been killed, and became a spy, risking his life, just to save Lily and her family. He took responsibility for his actions. He didn’t do it because he expected something from Lily. He hadn’t talked to her in years. It wasn’t selfish, it was selfless. He tried to save her and her family without expecting anything in return.

Do you know who saw Snape like the archetypal incel? Voldemort. And that mistake led to his downfall.

[jessmalia]

tell me your favourite disney songs pleaseeee

Ok I gotta start out with the BEST one so I'll just have it out there

I'LL MAKE A MAN OUT OF YOU IS A FUCKING MASTERPIECE! IT'S THE BEST DISNEY SONG EVER AND I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL! People have criticised me for liking it before because "uwu it has SEXISM in it that means it's BAD" like yeah??? it's a movie about female empowerment of course it's gonna have sexism in it, that doesn't make it problematic you fucking idiot. It's about as cold of a take as "oh no did you hear that Brokeback Mountain has homophobia in it? not very woke of them" like dude have you no critical thinking? I don't give a shit about the sexist lines it's a fucking BOP okay. I mean the lyrics???? "We must be swift as the coursing river With all the force of a great typhoon With all the strength of a raging fire Mysterious as the dark side of the moon" like WHO COMES UP WITH THAT?! And that's not even mentioning the fucking visuals okay? Like I genuinely believe it's the best training montage of all time (I haven't seen Rocky but my mom has and she said it's not as good. usually I wouldn't really trust her on these kinds of topics but I'm gonna take a wild guess and say she's right). I mean, the fucking visual of Mulan using her intelligence to climb up the pole and get the arrow, making everyone's training take a turn for the better? BEAUTIFUL! Also bisexual legend Lee Chang is shirtless during the entire thing 100/10.

Keeping it on the Mulan track, Reflection – the beautiful song that awakened something in EVERY queer kid (honestly tho I never really struggled with my queer identity that much so I actually relate to it more on an autistic level). Also THIS IS AN EDMUND SONG, I WILL FIGHT ANYONE WHO DISAGREES! 15/10. 

Then just, the entire Beauty and the Best soundtrack. It’s my favourite Disney movie of all time, it’s truly their magnum opus, and every song is a BOP. I relate to Belle so hard and she was also my first ever fictional crush at the age of 3. “Belle” is a great opening number that’s extremely musically effective since it serves both to establish the world and as an I want song. Belle (reprise) is just as great. Gaston is a great hilarious villain song that perfectly illustrates how the towns folk blindly love and follow Gaston AND how much of a fucking meme he is. Be Our Guest is grand and beautifully animated, and it serves to make us (and Belle) see the castle as home perfectly. Something There is just THE perfect song to illustrate growing romantic feelings. Beauty and the Beast is such a beautiful fucking love song I want to play it at my wedding! And The Mob Song has a Shakespeare reference in it, plus a lot of relevant as hell lyrics to its theme “We don't like what we don't understand, in fact it scares us And this monster is mysterious at least” what more could you want? honestly this entire song kinda reads like they’re going to kill a gay man or something, which makes sense since it was written by one, and it’s honestly terrifying through that perspective 20/10. 

I Won’t Say (I’m In Love) BASICALLY INVENTED MUSICAL THEATRE ITSELF HOLY SHIT! I fucking love to associate it with any ship that includes one of the characters being in denial (which is most of them). I’ve been listening to it a lot more lately since I put it on my meter playlist and it NEVER gets old. The muses trying to get Meg to say that she’s in love accommodated with her just refusing to admit it works soooo well. My favourite lyrics are “It's too cliche I won't say I'm in love” and “My head is screaming Get a grip girl Unless you're dying to cry your heart out” and “Face it like a grown-up When you gonna own up that you got got got it bad” and the ending part “At least out loud I won't say I'm in love” that one gets me every time. 20/10. 

Kiss the Girl is a fucking bop. I don’t have much else to say about it other than that. I hope my friends will sing it while trying to set me up with someone someday. 10/10.

I See the Light is such a wonderful love song and it always makes me think of Draco and Aria. Just the concept of finding your greater purpose through this person you never so coming, ah 😭😭😭. “You were my new Dream” “An you were mine” 10/10. 

I have a couple of songs where only the swedish version is special to me, and it’s all just cause memories with my dad from when I was little. So, idk you can listen to the swedish versions if you want even tho you won’t understand it (I mean you can just look up the English lyrics so that doesn’t really matter). Those are Thomas O’Malley, Ev'rybody Wants to Be a Cat (Alla Snubbar Vill Ju Vara Katt) and The Bear Necessities (Var Nöjd Med All Som Livet Ger). Me and my dad used to watch Aristocats all the time and his favourite character was Thomas O’Malley, so his love for the character and the song sort of seeped into me as well, and we both loved Alla Snubbar Vill Ju Vara Katt (I’m a cat person, what can I say?). We also watched The Jungle Book a lot and my dad was absolutely OBSESSED with Var Nöjd Med All Som Livet Ger. He sung it ALL THE TIME. I honestly think I’ve heard that song more than Let It Go. 15/10. 

Of course there’s a lot of other fantastic Disney songs out there (Hellfire and A Whole New World come to mind, I feel like they deserve an honourable mention) but these are just the ones that are more special to me personally. 

Also yes of course Reflection is a Henry song also but it’s just a given that if I relate anything to autism it also applies to Henry Mills

[diamondcitydarlin]

It should also be noted that Kate used Loki's genderfluidity as a constant hype train and advertising platform. Remember, there were just constant interviews/posts/articles about the show taking a massive step forward in the realms of trans representation, and then you watch and the show aaaaand...

sex: fluid

But you'd still see articles of the director patting herself on the back for bravely spoon-feeding the trans community this somehow groundbreaking advancement that also never manifested itself in any way.

She only stopped a while after the show ended when people realised she'd been blowing hot air the entire time and not only didn't do anything she promised in that regard, but never meant to.

I'll always be joyous for bisexual Loki, but I'll also never forget she used her getting him bisexual mainstream as a 'so you'll trust me when I make all these genderfluid promises too, right? You'll promise to watch the show, right?'

She did worse than queerbait in the end. She used the entire trans umbrella community as an advertising pick-me-up and as a trans guy miserable enough to still be here boy have the terfs recognised it too.

I remember, yes, and while my disgust with all of this exists and continues to grow stronger the more I hear, I will never know what it means to be excluded, appropriated and exploited in this way so I really appreciate you sharing this with me.

I've been mentioning this on my various flows of consciousness that I post here insofar as what it means for queer shipping, but the capitalist exploitation of queer identity is absolutely a problem across the board in mainstream entertainment. The corporations behind these productions are seeing a benefit in acknowledging queer identity and stories, specifically doing so with as little substance as possible.

In the case of Loki I don't necessarily fault the fans/viewers/public that got excited about the hint to Loki's gender maybe being more openly fluid in expression going forward (p sure if you carbondate my posts you'll see I was one of them lmao), or those of us that got excited about him confirming his attraction to more than one gender ('the bit of both' is still...a thing but that's another post). Because it was ultimately supposed to be more than that, right? These were meant to be the start of a character journey into an openly queer experience and it was only after Disney/Marvel/the creators collected all the accolades that it became clear that was literally going to be it. Boom bam we did that and now that's over and we can go back to writing for a cishet white male audience uwu

So yes, queer exploitation is absolutely a thing regardless of how ignorant corporations pretend to be about what they're intentionally, knowingly doing and they benefit from engaging writers/directors etc that also have their own self-centered motivations and won't be pushing too hard for the "difficult stuff".

And you know, all of this aside, it'd be one thing if Kate had genuinely believed she was doing a great thing at the time out of honest ignorance and THEN chose to listen to and amplify genderfluid/trans voices correcting that assumption and giving reasons as to why it failed. Because I get it, I can be dumb about this stuff too and it's important to acknowledge that so I can keep learning. (she also could have avoided the whole thing by fighting to have genderfluid/trans writers on the team but I digress)

In general, the casual comfort a lot of people have with being transphobic and disregarding trans/gf voices these days makes me physically ill. It is unspeakably cruel, and I am so sorry that it keeps happening again. And again. And again.

For what it's worth, none of you are alone in this fight even though I know it must feel like it a lot of the time. You have allies and those who care about your experiences and want to prioritize them, myself included, and I hope you will continue feeling safe on this blog anyway to be open with me about how the trans/fluidphobia in the show made you feel, how it could have been done better, how it SHOULD have been done better, how we as a fandom can craft our stories and headcanons to best incorporate this facet of Loki's character

[mamuzzy]

I don't think disney have the gut to create or give a pass for someone to create an actual queer character in Star Wars. Whenever I hear this "they call each other brothers!!!" argument to explain why shipping clones are immoral, I assume they have never spent one day in military environment. Or watched a military themed show beside TCW. Or never met an ethnic group who address eachother as brothers/sisters without any blood-relation. Being called brother/sister is usually something community driven, help to form the sense of belonging, strengthening bonds. In wrong hands a good progapanda tool.

I mean, when I first heard them referring each other brothers, my first thought was never about associating it to my own siblings, or any other sibling-relationships.

What about when fans treating Hunter as Dad and Echo a Mom? Technically, giving them parental roles that are not considered incest, and in ideal cases mom and dad love each other ( haha... in ideal cases... hahahaha *sobs*) but somehow it becomes disgusting when Hunter and Echo have constented relationship where they raise a child with care and love? Why is it disgusting and immoral?

(I know I uploaded this pic before, but we are on the topic again.) The closest we have for actual clone-siblings are the Nulls, due to adoption and Kal Skirata raising them as siblings, thus introducing them to traditional family values and traditional roles natborns often but not necessarily have. But this is it, clones don't have normal life, they don't have values of an earthling, they don't have any possible knowledge what is it to have an actual sibling and what is the role a sibling fill in a traditional familial hierarchy unless they were taught. And I don't think that this knowledge was prioritized for an army of men with very short life-span with only one goal: die for the Republic. But even if the nulls have relationship with each other? SO WHAT. They are fictional. They can't hurt you in real life unless they are a real person who do something to you without your consent. Fictional people with their fictional relationship hurt you? Don't read. block the tag. Read the warnings. Tear out the internet cable out and throw your pc and phone out of the WindoooOOOOoooOOoooooow!!!!!! Mandalorians can adopt each other how they want, vod/vode means both siblings and comrade. Dar'vod when you are too disgraced to be called a brother. But also they have the word "aruetii" for everyone who is not a mandalorian, not just traitors. So in my understanding, when clones refers each other a vod, they mean "this guy is one of us". They sense of loyalty and belonging so strong when they see another battallion of troopers stranger to them, they see them friendly faces (haha!!!).

This is why I love imagining conflicts between the GAR vs Coruscant Guard, Commandos vs Regular Troopers, Null ARCs vs Alpha ARCs, because when you are separated, when you have different upbringing, when you don't know each other, or you changed so drastically, how can you call a complete stranger a brother? Brother-in-arm? A comrade? Not just that they are not even sibling-coded brothers anymore (whatever it means to anyone), they aren't the brothers-in-arm you would trust your life or your mission!

AAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAA I could go on forever. XD

Giving you a big follow on both of your blogs to support the gays clones! <3

I am also appalled by the amount of hate, they are pretty queerplatonic coded (and that is putting it mildly)

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR KIND WORDS!!! <3 I saw that you started following me on my main, but yes, because of the toxic side of the fandom, I really wary of people at first and I usually wait and see if it's safe for me to interact/follow back. So reaching out and expressing your support means a lot for me and I'm glad that we became moots and I'm looking forward to see you on my dash. (/^-^(^ ^*)/ ♡ The very possibility that cloneship hate is originating from queerphobia really angered me because it hits really close to home but also I just can't tolerate bullying. Feeling negative emotions toward things are perfectly valid and we can't love the same things. Now actively participating in hurting others is a choice. People really forgot how to say "I don't like this thing", instead they go behind moralizing and comparing fiction to real life stuff. Artworks are supposed to be mirrors in which we see where are we standing in our personal growth and we can learn why are we reacting the certain a way to the feelings they cause in us, all this in a very safe environment. They are not rulebooks and especially are not universal truths.

TCW/TBB, even RepComm fandom can be horribly tiresome sometimes, but it's so nice when you actually can find nice people you can enjoy your favorite shows, ships, headcanons, fanworks together, inspiring and supporting each other. Also learning how to be tolerant with each other playing in this giant sand-box.

[sparrows-corner]

I posted 203 times in 2021

12 posts created (6%)

191 posts reblogged (94%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 15.9 posts.

I added 322 tags in 2021

#marvel - 60 posts

#mcu - 41 posts

#sam wilson - 39 posts

#tfatws - 38 posts

#bucky barnes - 32 posts

#art - 27 posts

#fav - 25 posts

#anthony mackie - 23 posts

#sambucky - 20 posts

#tfatws spoilers - 17 posts

Longest Tag: 98 characters

#sam wilson is a jumps head first into action without any preservation and 100% knows his own worth

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

So I'm gonna need a scene where Bucky has his cat, Alpine, tucked into his jacket while he rides a motorcycle.

That's literally all I need from the show. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk

47 notes • Posted 2021-02-27 19:55:54 GMT

#4

I'm pretty sure others have covered this so I'm going to make this short and sweet. But when it comes to what the director, Kari Skogland; or the writer, Malcolm Spellman have to say regarding Sam and Bucky's sexuality, please just disregard it.

These people, Marvel actors included, are put through rigorous media training and are instructed on what they can and cannot say regarding certain topics, sexuality included.

Even if they are coding a character a certain way in the show, they can't just come out and say that.

Plus, they also aren't coming out and stating "no, Sam/Bucky is straight"

As a queer Native American, trust me, I fucking get how desperate we are for representation. And it sucks how aggressively heteronormative the superhero genre can be. But please, as someone who has been doing this for a long time, try to not to take what they say in interviews to heart—even if they didn't actually feel that way, they wouldn't be able to say anything about it anyways.

Blame the house of mouse and the old-fashioned standards Hollywood still sets.

72 notes • Posted 2021-04-29 15:09:18 GMT

#3

THE ELECTRIC GUITAR IN YOU'RE NOT SORRY OMG

98 notes • Posted 2021-04-09 04:45:44 GMT

#2

*inserts The Office "they're the same picture" meme*

486 notes • Posted 2021-03-26 15:25:39 GMT

#1

There is literally NO hetero explanation for this.

1. The tight hold they have on one another the entire time they're rolling despite the fact that they could've let go and been totally fine.

2. Buckys hand on Sam's waist?!??!? I don't think I need to explain that one

3. The fact that when they stop rolling they don't immediately separate. THAT'S GAY YOUR HONOR

4. Buckys little eyebrow quirk as he looks down at Sam. SIR YOU ARE FLIRTING

5. Not pictured but Bucky staring up at the sky after rolling off of Sam just ✨speechless✨ because he is having MANY gay thoughts. Like come on.

Disney really went "oh you think you've seen queerbaiting, we'll show you queerbaiting"

526 notes • Posted 2021-03-26 14:38:45 GMT

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