#I don't know why but I just feel the need to post this

[no-144444]

Could you do an smau with Kimi Antonelli where he starts dating Verstappen!reader, and people joke about him dating her for Max because he's always fanboying about Max, thank you!

my brother, or me? -k.antonelli

summary: Kimi joins the grid with your brother, and you two stop posting each other on socials, cheating rumours spark, and your new album coming out doesn't help.

pairing: kimi antonelli x fem! singer! reader (i used tate mcrae as a face and album claim because she's so fucking good)

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youruser

liked by kimiantonelli, mercedesf1team, georgerussell and 4,764,382 others

youruser this is my boyfriend with a) my brother, b) his team boss (😐), and c) his best mate. the other two pictures of him are how he looks at me. the last picture is a representation of how i'm feeling. is it just a necklace?

comments

olliebearman it's just a necklace for me 🤷

kimiantonelli 🫠🫠🫠

mercedesf1team this is so… insane! 😹 -> youruser I CAN GET WORSE!

maxverstappen y/n, what the fuck is this? -> kimiantonelli NOTHING, she's insane -> youruser calling me crazy now? ⁉️ -> maxverstappen he's not wrong to... -> youruser both of you owe me an apology!

mercedesf1team we love kimi- toto -> youruser I LOVE KIMI. HE'S MINE! -> mercedesf1team we can share- toto -> youruser stan twitter will kill you. -> mercedesf1team he's all yours?- toto -> youruser YAY! @.kimiantonelli -> kimiantonelli please don't threaten my boss baby -> user242 why does he never play into her jokes? -> user82 ikr, it annoys me so much! can he not just join her in her whimsy? -> user2824 no, because she's immature and annoying, hope this helps xxxx

user24 Ollie and Kimi are awfully close...

user294 OLLIE AND KIMI PLEASE DON'T PULL A BROCEDES ON ME -> youruser I won't let them 🕺 -> user83 doing the lord's work -> youruser I try 🫶

paularon *honourable mention* the time when you surprised Kimi and Ollie was in his bed ⁉️⁉️ -> youruser better than the time i caught him looking at photos of my brother on pintrest😸 -> user57 he knows it's legal, right?

user855 My FAVOURITE part of Kimi and Y/n lore is that when she first met him she thought he was with Ollie 😹 -> user8356 nah, my fav gotta be when kimi freaked out over meeting max for the first time.

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mercedesf1team

likedby maxverstappen, georgerussell, and 853,847 others

mercedesf1team Rocking up to the paddock in style! 🦘🦘🦘

comments

youruser cutiepie! 🥧 -> georgerussell awh! thanks -> kimiantonelli she meant me?? -> youruser nah, i meant him. HE responds to my texts... unlike someone i know...

landonorris looking sharp

jackdoohan welcome to the homeland :) 🕺

user35 OMG HE'S SO HOT I NEED TO FUCK HIM -> youruser i get it🫠 -> maxverstappen please refrain from ever going on insta again -> youruser WHY IS EVERYONE TRYING TO CALM MY FREAK????

user8 a girl who is going to be ok

user924 YESSSS giving picture day realness!

user247 hamsters -> youruser I didn't see it in the tweet, but I see it with this one -> kimiantonelli ?????🤷‍♀️ -> youruser I'll explain when you get back to the garage -> kimiantonelli 👍 -> user28 they're so in love it genuinely HURTS me

user54975 i need a relationship like kimi and y/n

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youruser

liked by pierregasly, maxverstappen, redbullf1team, and 2,763,382 others

youruser promise new music next week, but here's these cuties on the first race weekend of the season! 🏎️🏎️🏎️

comments

user7 P MENTIONNNNN -> youruser obvi, i have to remind everyone i'm the best aunt ever😏 -> user08 oh to be y/n verstappen's niece... -> user924 I WISHHHHHH

maxverstappen who's that strapping young boy? -> youruser if you're talking about yourself... I think we're past young mr. pushing thirty...??? -> maxverstappen no i was talking about kimi :) -> kimiantonelli thanks mate! -> youruser STOP TRYING TO STEAL MY BOYFRIEND FREAK! 🐺 -> maxverstappen *succeeding

user92 THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTING

user358 they're both so pookie i cannot

user35 Once again, I ask myself WHY he's with HER. -> user123 ?????? -> user35 She's such a bitch and all she does is make fun of him, it's not cute, nor funny, and she goes around acting like it's hilarious. -> user123 has he complained once? -> user35 Not in public but I assume in private. Shocker that he likes her sister more than her.

paularon Y/n post a picture of herself challenge has been lost again...😔 -> user34 Paul gets it -> user234 PAUL PLEASE SAVE Y/N FROM KIMI -> user5588 ????? -> user234 he's so unwhimsy and boring compared to her, it's so sad how she has to dull herself down for him. 👎👎👎 -> user5588 has she literally EVER been dull? I DON'T THINK SO. -> user385 fr, people in relationships can be different kinds of people and once both of them are happy (which is true as far as we know), then why should we judge?

user995 WHY IS KIMI SO INTO MAX IT FREAKS ME OUT -> youruser THANK YOU -> olliebearman once i asked him if he ever fantasised about max when he was with y/n, he said no but... I didn't believe him.... -> youruser brb bleaching my eyes -> maxverstappen same. -> kimiantonelli NO I'M SORRY I WAS BEING TRUTHFUL I PROMISE 🙏🙏

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kimiantonelli

liked by youruser, maxverstappen, mercedesf1team, and 564,321 others

kimiantonelli Hard to put it in to words. Thank you all for the support xxx

comments

youruser my love 🫶 -> kimiantonelli my everything 🫶

user8 never felt more single in my life!

user554 why are they SO the alchemy coded

user5873 they were so cute then he won -> user248 when he ran out of the car, past his favourite person (y/n verstappen) to hug her brother instead? Or when he finally noticed her and gave her a tiny kiss and hug? -> user57756 become employed 😼

jackdoohan congratualtions mate! 🫡 -> youruser you're next on that podium, i feel it! -> jackdoohan let's hope so!

mercedesf1team Welcome to the family Kimi 'youngest race winner ever' Antonelli! -> youruser I know my goat. 😸

lewishamilton ⭐️

georgerussell amazing work mate -> liked by kimiantonelli

charlesleclerc major drive mate, well done

user556 why is it always about y/n in his comments??? ffs he just won a race!!!!! -> user57557 bc she's more famous than him? bc people care about their relationship? he's not going to pick you when he already has the most beautiful woman on the planet?

user577 WHAT A DRIVE!!!!!!!! -> liked by youruser

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youruser

liked by paularon, charlesleclerc, isackhadjar, and 4,342,249 others

youruser can confirm toto and I were in hysterics. holy fucking shit he won :)

comments

user99 my fav wag

user748 she's so me

mercedesf1team not hysterics- toto -> youruser and who was crying? -> mercedesf1team you u want him to have a seat next year? -> youruser YES PLEASE, I'M SORRY UR RIGHT IT WAS ME

load more comments...

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y/nverstappenHQ

liked by landonorris, kimiantonelli, pierregasly, and 325,593 others

y/nverstappenHQ 'so close to what' out next month, see you there xxx

comments

user5 kimi in the likes, not comments

user3847 OH PREPARE TO BE SICK OF MEEEEEE -> liked by youruser

user735 DIVA DOWN, DIVA DOWNNNNNN 🕺

paularon she's eating the house boots down houston we have a problem (did i use that right?) -> youruser why yes you did king! 👑 -> user835 no way we got paul aron saying THAT before GTA 6. -> georgerussell does anyone understand what any of that was??? -> paularon I'll teach you, just get me a meeting with toto, yeah? -> mercedesf1team I'm interested- toto -> paularon HOLY SHIT THAT WORKED WHAT 😼

jackdoohan the cuntiest of them all I fear -> liked by kimiantonelli

olliebearman WORK IT GIRL!!! 🕺🕺🕺

landonorris oh this is going to go HARD -> youruser you get it, and i appreciate that. 🧡

isackhadjar POOKIE IS EATING AND SERVING CUNTTTTTT -> youruser MY FUCKING BOY 🫡

user348 where tf is kimi rn? -> user2345 probably hyperventilating over his super hot girlfriend 😏

user245 Babe wake up, new y/n music just dropped. -> user348537 I'M FREAKING OUT ⁉️⁉️⁉️

user959 gorgeous gorgeous girls listen to y/n while watching formula one -> oscarpiastri they also listen to her while competing in f1 :) 🧡 -> landonorris HE'S SO DIVAA!!!! -> youruser oscar, i love you queen 🙏👑

christianmansell SLAYYYYYYY -> youruser SLAYYYYYYYYYYY

davidmalukas PRETTY BITCHES LISTEN TO Y/N VERSTAPPEN 💯💯 -> youruser YOU JUST GET ITTTTTTTTTT

maxverstappen please get off this app 👍 -> user475 DON'T SAY SUCH THINGS PLEASE MAX -> user457 older brother core

yourfriend UGH THIS ALBUM 💯💯 ->youruser ugh your gorgeous faceeee -> liked by yourfriend

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olliebearman

liked by paularon, youruser, kimiantonelli and 542,452 others

olliebearman kimi when he finds out about his girlfriend's next album: picture one. kimi when he realises max is free to talk in the paddock: picture two. @.kimiantonelli @.youruser @.maxverstappen

comments

youruser it's a sad truth... he likes him more than me... 😿 -> olliebearman I still love you more than I love Kimi so it's fine. -> kimiantonelli ⁉️🤷‍♀️ -> user385 OLLIE AND Y/N????

user53 ollie is shooting his shot and i do not blame him

user356 when will they just ditch kimi and get together? they were always cuter together anyway? -> user66 SHE'S BEEN DATING KIMI FOR ACTUAL YEARS WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE 🙏🙏🙏🙏

yourfriend he's a bitch -> youruser PLAY NICE IT'S KIMI! 😸 -> yourfriend ...👎

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isackhadjarprivate

liked by kantonelli, max4verstappen, yourprivuser, and 283 others

isackhadjarprivate us when we hear kimi embarrass himself in front of max AGAIN

comments

yourprivuser ik he's ur grid dad, but let him live @.kantonelli

pauloaron no way ISACK (aka the KING of embarrassing himself in front of Lewis Hamilton) had to call him out 🙏

olliebear the girls are fighting! 🕺 -> youruser he's learning! 👑

estebestie ...

lewishamilton it is pretty bad... 🙈

max4verstappen guys let's not be mean :( -> kantonelli exactly!

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paularon

liked by youruser, kimiantonelli, maxverstappen, and 734,294 others

paularon Us enjoying our time away from our son (aka Kimi, her boyfriend)

comments

jackdoohan MI BABES -> youruser MI JACKIE!!!

olliebearman looking fabulous paulito ->liked by paularon -> user385 MY PAUOLLIE HEARTTTT

user23 still boyfriend??? -> user556 be so fr they deffo broke up -> user323 if they broke up i don't believe in love. -> user345 please get a job.

kimiantonelli invite me? -> youruser i did :( u said no. -> user4 istfg if kimi hurts her i'll CURSE HIM

landonorris stop i want to be your frienddddd -> youruser invite me to mclarennnn bitch

pierregasly looking cute -> youruser why are u in love with paul? -> pierregasly why aren't you?

user555 DID ANYONE CATCH PIERRE'S COMMENT LMAO -> user99 PAULY/N TRUTHERS RISEEEEEE -> user13 he's so me it's crazy

liamlawson the pookie group :) -> youruser you're my pookie

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olliebearman

liked by kimiantonelli, youruser, paularon, and 742,294 others

olliebearman flicks from the past couple races, adios to Y/n and GOOD LUCK ON TOUR!

comments

user76243 so we're not talking about ioio? -> user356 i'm employed what does this mean -> user58583 basically the girl in the middle is a singer (y/n verstappen) and is dating the f1 rookie kimi antonelli, and she just released a song that makes it look like kimi cheated... no one in the paddock or her has said anything so we have no idea if that's actually what's going on

user576 BADDIE ALERT 🚨🚨🚨

maxverstappen who's the gremlin in the middle photo? -> kimiantonelli she sometimes comes into my garage to touch my hair... freaky. -> maxverstappen she does the same to me... freaky... -> youruser please stop with the joint bullying i just like to play with hair :) -> kimiantonelli weird hobby but i love you anyways so i guess it doesn't matter :) -> maxverstappen as sweet as it is to know my sister is loved, please refrain from doing it on instagram -> kimiantonelli 👍 got it max! -> youruser LET ME BE LOVED OUT LOUD MAX FFS NOT ALL OF US HAVE A FAMILY -> maxverstappen I'm your brother?? -> youruser I don't even know what i meant there??? -> user50 y/nkimi CRUMBS and he's in love omfg they're so cute

jackdoohan how's that hottie in the third slide single? 😏 -> paularon have you seen him and kimi? I wouldn't exactly call him single -> user767 PAUL WHAT DO YOU KNOW?????

user87y/n is GLOWING post break-up. she's seriously so stunning

user75 Y/NPAUL TRUTHERS RISEEEEEE -> user784 I've been here

gabrielborteleto the divas are in town 🙀

liamlawson BADDIE PAUL 😻😻😻 -> paularon "bad crash for lawson, straight into the barriers in the first turn" -> this u? -> liamlawson do you live to humble me? -> youruser I do... 😼

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f1WAGgossip

liked by pierregasly, yourfriend, and 823,392 others

f1WAGgossip Trouble in paradise? Singer/songwriter, WAG to Kimi Antonelli, and sister to Max Verstappen, Y/n Verstappen, recently released a song called 'it's ok, i'm ok', possibly alluding to the idea that Kimi might've cheated on her! They haven't been seen much together, though she has been in the paddock, but now she's going on tour.

comments

user37 y/n nation we ride at dawn

user25 I KNEW PAUL WOULD'VE BEEN BETTER FOR HER -> user5779 0 days since a pauly/n 'truther' has pissed me off. she's clearly better suited to ollie. -> user565 SHE'S DATING KIMI?????

user935 PLEASE SAY THIS IS A JOKE

user2133 finally she's free of him -> user356 ???? -> user2133 i just think they're not right for each other. she's so extroverted and open and he's just so... not. Like he seems extroverted but just not with her, and he seems to not get her humour. -> user84 key word? SEEMS! you know nothing about their private and personal relationship.

user244 PLEASE SAY KIMI IS SINGLE NOW

user73 finally i have a chance with kimi! -> user935 do you enjoy humiliating yourself online?

user358 guys i fear this might be the end of kimiy/n, her friend and pierre gasly liked this... -> user55 ok, and let's be so real, her friend fucking hates kimi. -> user546 maybe she has a reason to? she actually knows him personally????

user3853 my mate is in F2 and knows kimi and said he's been just off his phone for the past few weeks. i think they broke up AGES ago. -> user76 deffo had nothing to do with the fucking F1 season starting up, right? you are a moron, so is your friend.

user46 pierre here for the drama and i respect it

user7835 CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE NEW ALBUM AND HOW GOOD SHE LOOKS???

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youruser

liked by landonorris, maxverstappen, olliebearman and 4,342,245 others

youruser holy shit! tour is underway, max actually (WILLINGLY) came to a show, and got p1 the next day! I must be a good luck charm!

comments

jackdoohan might need some of that good luck over here in alpine... -> youruser bro you've had three podiums in an alpine wtf are you on about????? -> jackdoohan how hard did you hit your head last night???

user83 NO KIMI LIKE? IS IT OVER ???? -> user2567 i'm done if they are -> user3678 sleeping on the highway brb!!!

user35702 KIMI IS GONE, PAUL YOU MUST RISEEEEE

user244 OLLIE HAS A CHANCE!!!! -> user7565 yall are crazy they havent even TOLD anyone yet. Just let them live.

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kimiantonelli

liked by maxverstappen, lewishamilton, landonorris and 312,329 others

kimiantonelli Great season so far, up to P2 in the constructors, and P3 in the drivers. Can't wait to go back to racing, but first, some rest :)

comments

user835 not to be chronically online but y/n hasn't commented or liked???

user530 babes... it might be over.

user995 broke up with his sister, but still gotta get max in, i respect the grind.

user123 this is so insane i fear

user92 he looks so sad :( -> user573 he's a grown man -> user83 babe he's 18 and has been dating her for 3 years, it's a big deal

user8357 why isn't anyone talking about his incredible start to the season???

user345 guys i'm so devastated

oscarpiastri Putting in the work mate, good job! -> liked by kimiantonelli

alexalbon Forza Kimi -> liked by kimiantonelli

user3575 if my boyfriend broke up with me, i'd kill my brother for still being his fucking photodump -> liked by yourfriend

user375 ollie still making it into the photodump is so boyfriend coded

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f1WAGgossip

liked by yourfriend, pierregasly, landonorris, and 2,349,924 others

f1WAGgossip Crisis averted! Kimi and Y/n are fine (as far as we know), and he actually visited her at her show last night in Montreal. He surprised her on stage and everything!

comments

user83 I'M SORRY DID YOU SEE THE WAY HE LOOKED AT HER??

user34 she looked so stunning last night, and he was ENTRANCED fr -> user84 i get it.

user75 this is the best news i've had all week, and I passed the bar this week

user457 they're my fav couple -> landonorris same tbh

user450 can we talk about how yourfriend was adding fuel to the flames?? like wtf -> yourfriend lol, my b. kimi pissed me off. He's actually so in love with her it's so annoying and he takes her away from me :( -> youruser I still love you too :)

kimiantonelli People thought we were broken up? @.youruser -> user8435 LMAO -> user47 dude didn't even know -> user57 have you been living under a rock???? -> kimiantonelli No, I've been racing???? -> youruser could've sworn i told you, sorry love :) -> kimiantonelli all goo love. just to check, we aren't broken up, right? -> youruser nope. i'm all yours. -> kimiantonelli 👍 -> user353 why is he a thumbs up warrior?? -> user7565 they're so cute i want to claw my eyes out.

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navigation for my blog :)

mercedes & williams masterlist

[oikarma]

look me in the eye | pt.2

pairing: max verstappen x rbr!engineer!reader

summary: the rb21 is unfixable but that's definitely not the only reason max verstappen wants you around.

a/n: "who cares what they think" bf and overthinker gf are my roman empire

part one / part two

── ⟢ ・⸝⸝

Max doesn't give you much of a choice.

One minute, you're wrapping up post-race debriefs with your teammates, pretending that you're not reeling from his reaction to your possible departure. They're very polite and do not pry into the conversation they all obviously heard. The next, he's standing by the garage exit, jacket in hand, waiting.

"Dinner," he says. It’s not a request.

You hesitate, glancing around. "I mean, I don't think-"

"I need to talk to you." His words are softer but still determined. "Properly. Not in the garage. Not with twenty people listening."

Your stomach twists. You should say no. You should.

Instead, you find yourself sitting across from him in a dimly lit restaurant, the scent of freshly baked bread and seared steak filling the air. It's nothing fancy. Fancy means attention. It's quiet, tucked away, the kind of place he probably picked because he assumed no one would bother him here.

But Max Verstappen is not someone who goes unnoticed.

Right now he's focused, barely glancing at the menu. It feels more like a business arrangement than a catch-up. That's how it's meant to be. Max is, in the hierarchy pyramid, somewhere a few diagonal triangles above you.

"Tell me what you need," he says as his fingers tap restlessly against the table. "More support? More control over the car setup? I'll talk to Christian."

You sigh, setting your menu down. "Max, it's not just about that. It's-"

A hushed voice at a nearby table. A phone camera clicks and, judging by the kerfuffle that follows, the person who pressed the button didn't expect it to be so loud.

Your stomach drops. Max's gaze flickers over your shoulder, jaw tightening as realization dawns.

"Shit," he mutters.

You don't turn around. You don't need to. The whispers are getting louder, the occasional giggle or gasp confirming what you already know-someone recognized him. And worse? They recognized you.

Your chest tightens. This is exactly what you didn't want. Attention. Speculation. The internet dissecting every detail of why Red Bull's star driver is having dinner with one of the team's engineers. Especially after that interview. Two things that should not be happening in quick succession.

Max leans forward and his voice is low. "Hey."

You shake your head, gripping your napkin like it's a lifeline. "I need to go."

"If you leave now, it’ll be worse."

You know he's right. Storming out will just make it look more suspicious. But that doesn’t stop the anxiety creeping up your spine.

Max studies you for a moment before making a decision. He leans back, body language shifting, a small smirk curling at the corner of his lips. Then, loud enough for the nearby table to hear-

"You're overthinking. Just enjoy your food."

It's so casual, so normal, that for a split second, it throws you off. And judging by the way the whispers fade just a little, it throws everyone else off too.

Max is playing it cool. Acting like this is nothing, just a casual dinner, nothing worth speculating over.

You swallow hard, forcing yourself to match his energy. You pick up your menu again, even though you're too tense to focus on the words. "Fine," you sigh. "But if this ends up all over Twitter, I'm blaming you."

His grin deepens. "I'll take full responsibility."

Under the table, where no one can see, his fingers graze against yours. It's only for a second. It's probably an accident, you tell yourself.

You look into his eyes and you know it means so much more than just that.

── ⟢ ・⸝⸝

You wake up to chaos.

Your phone won't stop buzzing. The messages, missed calls, and notifications stacking up faster than you can process. At first, you think it's just another race week frenzy. Then you open Twitter.

Max Verstappen on a dinner date with Red Bull engineer. Garage romance?

Attached is the photo. A little grainy, taken from the next table over, but unmistakably you and Max. He's leaning in, smirking, looking far too comfortable across from you. You're gripping your menu like you were ready to bolt.

There are too comments to keep track of.

user1 she's been in the garage w him all season user2 Bro is dating his own engineer to fix the car 💀💀💀 user3 i fear they look GOOD together user4 is she the one he slipped up about in the interview??

You barely register the rest before Christian Horner is calling you. You pick up immediately instead of letting him go to voicemail. This is bad.

"Do you know what's happening online?"

You pinch the bridge of your nose. "I just saw it."

He breathes loudly-you can hear it over the phone. "Look, we don't comment on personal lives, but if anyone asks, we stick to the story. It was a casual team dinner, nothing more. Max's team is probably already handling it."

Max.

As if on cue, another message flashes across your screen.

Unknown It's Max

Unknown Don't look at twitter

Too late.

By the time you get to the paddock, the damage is done. Journalists are already circling, cameras flashing whenever you so much as breathe near Max's side of the garage. You stick next to Liam's car. You don't know what you're doing there, but he kind of does and pretends to talk with you about something he doesn't understand either. Good lad.

You keep your head down, pretending not to notice the murmurs. When you step into the engineering office, Max is already waiting.

He's scrolling through his phone. You can't see anything behind those startling blue-green eyes of his. You still can't when he looks up. "They're making a big deal out of nothing."

You exhale. "I'm trending on Twitter."

He shrugs, completely unfazed. "And?"

You blink. "And? Do you know what people are saying? That I'm-” You lower your voice. “That I'm sleeping with you for my job. That you’re-”

"Using you to fix the car?" His lips press together. Now his eyes darken, the sky before the storm. "Bullshit. Do they not know how engineers work? They fix the car anyway."

You shake your head. "It doesn't matter if it's bullshit. It's out there."

Max crosses his arms. "So?"

"So?" you echo, incredulous. "I don't want this. I don't want my name attached to you like I'm some stupid tabloid headline!"

He seems to read you. "Do you think I wanted it either? I just wanted dinner. I wanted to talk to you, convince you not to leave. Not...this."

Your anger deflates. You can't be mad at him. People are people.

Max pushes off the desk and steps closer. "Tell you what. If you want, I'll shut it down. Tell them all it's nothing, that it was just a stupid meal. That you mean nothing to me."

The words sting even though you know he doesn’t mean them.

You swallow hard. "Would you?"

His jaw tightens. "If that’s what you want."

You should say yes. You should. But he's the one waiting for you to make a choice-the choice-and you're frozen.

"I don't know," you whisper.

Is that relief you see on his face?

"Then we don't say anything."

── ⟢ ・⸝⸝

The orange army has risen, and it's not McLaren's. The checkered flag waves, and above the screaming engines and the crackling of team radios, one thing is clear: Max Verstappen has won again.

Against the odds, against the struggles, against a car that has fought him all season, he has done what Max Verstappen does best.

He has won.

The Red Bull garage erupts. Engineers shout, mechanics throw their arms around each other, and the pit wall slams their hands down in victory. You barely register the chaos because your eyes are glued to the screens, watching as Max slows down on his cool-down lap, his voice breaking through the radio.

"YES, LET'S GO!" His laugh is breathless. "That was so, so good. Thank you, guys. Thank you."

You exhale. He did it. You don't even recognize the warm feeling going through you because suddenly, he's there.

Before you can even process it, Max is sprinting toward the garage, helmet ripped off, his fireproofs half-unzipped and clinging to his sweat-drenched skin. There's no hesitation, no second-guessing-shouldn't he be out there?-as he skids next to you.

Your heart lurches.

You don't even have time to move before he reaches you, before his hands find your waist and he pulls you in.

"Max-" Your protest dies in your throat because holy shit he's so close. His breath is warm against your skin, adrenaline pouring off him in waves.

"You," he pants, eyes wild and utterly alive. "You made that happen."

You shake your head, flustered beyond belief. "Max, you-"

But he cuts you off, hands tightening like he's afraid you'll slip away. "No. You fought for this car. You never stopped." He swallows, chest rising and falling. "I don't know what I'd do if you weren't here."

You feel every nerve in your body short-circuiting.

Your mouth opens, but nothing comes out. Just static.

Max searches your face. He looks at you as he does his father, after a race is over. Like this win doesn't mean as much if you aren't part of it. There is one person in the world he cares about making happy...might there be a second?

You’re completely, utterly speechless.

"Lost for words?" he teases.

You shove at his chest, but your laughter betrays you. "Shut up, Verstappen."

You untangle yourself from his grasp and motion for him to greet some other of the team members. The media must be having a field day. And after the entire PR talk, too.

── ⟢ ・⸝⸝

The celebrations are still in full swing when Max is pulled into an interview. The champagne drips from his hair as a permanent grin is stretched across his face. He's still breathless, still buzzing, still high off the win.

The reporter from Sky Sports barely has to ask the first question before Max is already talking.

"Max, that was an incredible drive. How does it feel to take this victory after the struggles you’ve had with the car?"

Max laughs easily. "Yeah, it wasn't easy. The car still isn't perfect, but today, it worked. And that's not just me, that's the team, that's the people who keep pushing-"

His words cut off for a second, his mind catching up to his own excitement. His tongue is loose, his filter nonexistent.

And then-

"-that's her."

The interviewer blinks. "Who?"

Max doesn't hesitate. "My engineer."

Oh.

Oh, shit.

Your stomach drops as you watch from the back of the garage, eyes wide as the cameras zoom in on him. He's still grinning, still glowing, and either he doesn't realize what he just said or he does not care.

"She-" he stops himself, shaking his head like he can't find the right words. "She works harder than anyone. Every problem with this car, she's been on it. I mean, I was nowhere at the start of the season, and now, we're here. If anyone deserves credit, it's her."

The reporter raises an eyebrow. "That's very high praise. Would you say she's been a crucial part of your season?"

Max tips his head back in his laughter, and it's so obvious now, the way he's still running on instinct, how he's still in the moment.

"She's been-" He stops, a flicker of hesitation crossing his face. And then, softer-too soft for someone who's just talking about an engineer-he finishes:

"She's everything."

The interviewer's eyes widen slightly, and there’s a second-just a second-where you see the exact moment he realizes what he just let slip. Max's lips press together, like maybe if he stops talking now, the words will somehow erase themselves. But the damage is already done.

Your heart slams against your ribs.

Max turns his head like he can see you in the garage. He's searching, looking for you.

You panic. You run.

But the world has already heard him. You're not just another engineer.

You're Max Verstappen's everything.

── ⟢ ・⸝⸝

The second you step back into the Red Bull garage, cheeks flushed from your bathroom pacing and breakdown, you know you're screwed.

The looks. The whispers. The way people pretend not to be staring but are absolutely staring. Because, of course, everyone saw the interview.

The moment Max Verstappen, three-time world champion, winner of the race, decided to open his mouth and say-

"She's everything."

You could kill him.

Scratch that. You will kill him.

Your heart is still hammering from the moment you heard it, from the way he looked for you afterward, like he wasn't even the slightest bit embarrassed about saying something that made it sound like-like-you don't even know what it sounded like, but it was definitely not normal driver-engineer talk.

And now, here you are, trying to avoid eye contact with every single person in the garage while searching for the idiot responsible.

It doesn't take long.

Max, being Max, doesn't bother hiding. He's standing by the monitors, still in his fireproofs, arms crossed over his chest, looking completely unbothered. He should be celebrating. Why is he not out celebrating?

He's still waiting for you.

The moment he sees you, his expression shifts. Something smug, something amused, something that makes you want to strangle him.

You grab his arm and yank him into the nearest private space you can find.

"Max," you hiss, barely able to contain yourself. "What the hell was that?"

His brows furrow. "What?"

"What?" you repeat. "You-on live television-you called me everything."

Max blinks, looking so utterly relaxed that you want to shake him. "Yeah."

You stare at him, waiting for him to realize the problem, to acknowledge that he just threw you to the media wolves with zero warning.

Nothing. Just calm, slightly confused Max Verstappen.

"You do realize what that sounded like, right?" You press, feeling your face heat up. "Everyone's losing their minds. Twitter is exploding. Horner gave me a look. Do you know how scary it is when Christian Horner gives you a look?"

Max’s lips twitch. He's fighting a smirk and he's not winning. "I mean… was I wrong?"

"What?"

He tilts his head, like he's considering his words. "You are everything. To this team. To the car. To-" He stops himself, but it’s already too late.

He knows exactly what he said.

"Max-"

"Tell me I'm wrong."

You can't, because he isn't. Maybe you've known it all along. Maybe this is why you can't leave the stupid team, even though it's causing hair loss and severe lack of sleep.

So you don't. Instead, you grab him by the collar and pull him down. Max lets out the softest, most relieved exhale before he crashes into you.

It's not a soft kiss. It's not careful, or hesitant, or anything close to restrained. It's desperate. It's months of tension snapping all at once.

You make a soft noise-half surprise, half something else entirely-and that's all it takes.

Max groans, deep and low, like he's wanted this for as long as you have, and suddenly it's worse, because now he's tilting his head, deepening the kiss, pressing you back until you hit the nearest surface.

You don't even know where you are anymore. A storage closet? A backroom? It doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is him. The way he tastes like champagne and adrenaline, the way he kisses like he races. All-consuming and with only one thing on his mind.

You should stop. You know you should stop. The entire garage is just outside. Someone will notice. Someone will hear.

You thread your fingers into his hair, tugging just slightly, and Max shudders.

"Fuck," he mutters against your lips, utterly wrecked. His eyelids flutter, long lashes too. Max runs a finger down to your chin, forcing you to look at him. "You're overthinking again."

He's completely right. But you don't stop then. You relax and just let Max Verstappen take over every single thought in your mind.

── ⟢ ・⸝⸝

a/n: i just need a man who's bad at emotions but also so good at them

[daenysx]

you KNOW what i'm going to ask for............... (probably not but anyways :•) )

can i get one sleepy sirius? unless you're not feeling like it, could i request a domestic intimacy drabble with him looking very pretty as usual?

ALSO, can we gossip abt your crush???? i need all the juicy details of this lucky individual

i knew it, angel!! i hope you enjoy- and also of course we can gossip about him, he's literally consuming my mind these days (all i can say in this post is that he kinda looks like ben barnes and he's so tall, i'm fucked)

-send me drabble requests!

sirius black x fem!reader, fluff

"Oh, fuck," Sirius groans next to you. What time is it, and why is he awake before you? Something terrible must have happened. You blink your eyes open to clouds filling the room's air with grey and blurry. Sirius mumbles a few words, his hand in his hair.

"What's wrong?" you ask, unable to find your voice. "Are you okay?"

He turns in bed, his eyes are almost closed, and he's frowning. It's so early to frown, you think, already dreaming of your morning coffee. Sirius' arm, the one he currently wraps around your waist begs to differ, though.

"I put my head wrong on the pillow and my hair's ruined," he murmurs. "Look, no waves. It doesn't feel soft at all."

So sleepy and yet he worries over his hair. In your defense, his deep black locks look the same every morning, you don't know why he decided to be upset over it today.

"You haven't even looked at the mirror." you say.

"I don't need to, lovely, I can feel it just fine."

You're silently asking for him to fall back asleep. Just for a few hours more.

"Baby, it looks okay," you tell him, snuggling into his bare chest. "You can always fix it the way you want, right?"

Sirius takes pity on your sweet words, you tangle your legs with his and kiss his shoulder. He rubs a big hand on your hip as a response.

"It's frustrating, waking up like this after having shower," he murmurs with a hazy voice. He stretches slowly and settles down again in the warm sheets.

"You look perfect."

"Thank you, my angel, it was my intention to hear this all along."

Sirius loves sleeping. He loves how you sound when you get closer to him, how your fingers seek his chest to keep them on his heart. He loves the moment before falling asleep, almost unconscious, but still feeling you in his arms. It's like a practiced performance, a routine he adores. He kisses your collarbone lazily, mouth gentle and warm against your skin. Your breaths tickle his neck, he cups the back of your head to pull you even closer.

"What time is it?" you ask. "Do we have to wake up?"

To be honest, he doesn't know the time, has no idea about it really. Guessing is an easy process, though, urging you to sleep in his arms is even easier. "I don't think so," he replies with confidence. "Go back to sleep."

You do as he says in a few seconds, your head tucked in his shoulder nicely. His fingers wander on your back to keep you there, your lips are faint against his neck. "I meant it," you say, words slipping away. "You're so pretty."

It takes every bit of control in him, to not kiss you in a way that will wake you up. He sighs, a warm feeling spread on his chest, something soft crawling in his belly. You give away your affection like it's in your nature and Sirius is amazed every time. He presses his lips on your forehead, warm lips pulling you into a deeper slumber.

[rainb0ws-h4t]

Savanaclaw

Original

I finally posted this part omg

Octaniville should be out within a week if I'm not busy🫦 (that's a lie, signing of clearance is hell)

Warnings: unhealthy relationships (the boys do not love the reader for good reasons) manipulation, yandere themes, twisted devotion

Leona Kingscholar

Leona Kingscholar? Who? You didn't even know he attended NRC for a few months. The cause being that he almost never attended his classes and never made an appearance unless he was dragged into it. It was only a week before you properly became friends with Yuu did you see him in person.

He towered over Yuu threateningly, silently forcing them to go where he was going. He flashed anyone who dared come close a sinister gaze, a gaze that makes you feel like prey that was soon to be feasted on.

Initially, you learned to avoid him. Unlike Riddle and the others, it would take more than just a few sharp words to get him to leave Yuu alone.

Until it was Wednesday and Yuu has yet to make an appearance in Mr. Trein's class. It has been like this for over a week now and you can visibly see the dissapointment in Mr. Trein's eyes as he glances at Yuu's seat.

They've been missing a lot of material lately, and Mr. Trein just announced a quiz next week. Knowing that they had a lot of trouble with history especially, you made it your responsibility to get them back of track.

Luckily for you, you know who is the reason for their dissapearance.

Approaching the Botanical Gardens, you already see a tail poking out of the bushes. Unimpressed, you stomped on it intentionally.

Startled, Leona awoke instantly. "Shit— Did you do that?" He sternly glared at you, expecting you to start apologizing.

You could see Yuu, who was caged in his arms, breathe a sigh of relief as you made an appearance. Meanwhile you were just glad Leona didn't drool on them.

"Yeah? Now let Yuu go. A quiz's coming up next week and they need to study." You commanded, not submitting into his predatory glare.

"And what?" He sneered before sitting up and turning to Yuu. "Hey, you're a smart one, right? I'm sure you can just miss one quiz and make up for—" Leona let out a pained growl as you stomped harshly on his tail again. "What the fuck!"

Yuu was immediately pulled up from the ground and into your arms.

"What the hell do you think your doing?" He asked aggressively, his sharp canines becoming more apparent than ever. "You've got some real guts to stomp on my tail like that. Why don't we make it even?" The dark shadow over his face clearly implied a darker meaning.

"Awh, that's a shame. I thought I would be able to snap your tail off." You retorted, not relenting. Still, some small part of you felt nervous facing Leona.

"You barely scratched me."

"Based on your reaction, I'm pretty sure I did more than just a cute scratch. Hey, what if I do it again? Third time's a charm, right? Maybe it'll actually snap your tail—" You could barely dodge one of his spells as it lunged towards you.

You and Yuu groaned on the ground. You felt bad for just pulling them to the ground harshly, but atleast you two weren't hit.

"What... Did you just try to kill us?!" You exclaimed.

"Nothing serious, just to paralyze you for a few seconds." He snarked. Although his tone was calm, there was a slight edge to his voice that you didn't like. "Now, give me that little herbivore back and maybe I'll spare you."

"Nothing serious my ass! Come on, Yuu—" you made an attempt at leaving with Yuu but was blocked by a tall figure.

His towering silhouette made you step back a few steps, "You've got some snark I'll give you that, but I wasn't kidding when I said give me the herbivore back." His darkened gaze fell on you, daring you to disobey him.

You glanced at Yuu, and they did too. You turned back with an annoyed stare, "Fine. I'll leave you two alone." You could sense Yuu's nervousness as you spoke out your last syllable.

A small smirk forms on Leona's lips, "Hah. Glad to see I've tamed the feral beast." As he let down his guard, you instantly took Yuu's wrist and dashed out of the Botanical Gardens as fast as you could.

You and the prefect ran inside the school and hid behind a crowd of people, hoping it would cover your scent. You scanned the area before pulling Yuu behind a wall.

"You alright?" You asked, checking for any scratches or bruises they might've gotten.

"I'm fine.. Thanks a lot by the way." They said with a small tint of red on their cheeks but you didn't think much of it. "Why did you do that?"

"Hm?"

"Why did you willingly provoke Leona? He can get violent when he wants to, y'know.." Yuu said, rubbing their forearm.

"Well, it was to save you, of course." You responded truth fully. "And to remind you about Mr. Trein's quiz soon."

You could only chuckle fondly as the prefect groans.

____

Leona didn't like you.

In better words, he despised you.

Even at the very start when he heard of the new friend the prefect has been hanging around with lately. (In fact he hates anyone who dared come close to Yuu.)

He didn't like it at all when the prefect suddenly started made him start feeling like he was second place all over again. Constantly having the need to be better and work harder to gain any form of validation from that one person who he wishes could just look at him like he was irreplaceable.

Unfortunately, those pair of eyes that stare at him so lovingly are only just an illusion he creates in his mind.

He hated that. That part of him who yearns for validation never moved on, never grew up to be the man he is now. That part was still stuck as a child, a constant reminder of the never acknowledged second prince of the kingdom.

The prefect was the first to fully acknowledge this when he overblotted. Even if he gave a cold shoulder, he couldn't help but feel a small moment of bliss. A moment where he could forget all his burdens and just focus on the attention he received from the prefect.

Until you came along.

He has memorized the prefect's schedule to the exact second. He was planning to drag them to the Botanical Gardens. He expected them to be around the courtyard, walking to class. Instead, after 10 minutes of waiting, he finds you and Yuu studying in the library.

When he waits in the library, he suddenly spots you two hanging around in the courtyard.

Some twisted delusion in his mind made him think you were intentionally doing this to spite him, even if you two have yet to even meet at that time. Sevens, he didn't even meet you but he already WIDELY hates you.

Safe to say, you and Leona were on bad terms. You didn't like him and he probably despises you. His death glares whenever you walked past him with Yuu only confirmed that. A chilling glare that would make a regular student scurry away, but you refused to make yourself look small to him, it doesn't matter how terrified you were.

Leona isn't sure when he purposefully walks by you just to make eye contact and see your hardened gaze directed towards him.

Leona isn't sure why the only reason he ever gets up from the Botanical Gardens is to see you glaring at him intensely.

He unintentionally remembers your schedule within a week, bumping into you more often than you would like. Ruggie is stuck wondering why Leona isnt at the Gardens when he needs him.

"Ugh!" You fall to the ground harshly after bumping into someone, your research papers scattering. Yuu wasn't with you at this time, they were currently carrying out a task Crowley had assigned them with Grim.

"I'm sorry! Are you okay-" you immediately stopped yourself when you lifted your head, locking on a pair of emerald eyes you dread to see as you walk in the halls of NRC.

An amused glint flickered in his green eyes as he scanned over your figure and the scattered papers. "What a mess, beasty. Suppose you should start cleanin' up now. Why don't I lend you a helpful hand?" He reaches downwards to grab one of the papers, and examining the contents inside.

You snapped your hand forward to grab the loser back but he moved away last second, "I don't need your help-"

"Won't ya look at the effort you put in to this paper? Color me impressed." He mocked. Of course you had out effort into that paper, everything was hand written-

Rips

The sound of papper ripping made you watch Leona in horror as he tore up your research paper right in front of you with no shame in his face at all. He even had the nerve to show a form of enjoyment at your cost.

It didn't help that that paper was the paper with all the factual evidence you had researched. Having to redo it again and pass within an hour would result in a rushed and low quality text.

Seeing the pieces of paper float downwards, an ugly and hideous emotion started bubbling up within you.

'How can he just stand there looking smug?! How do people look up to this man?! Who cares if you're a prince! I hope you die, Leona Kingscholar!'

Leona had expected you to start an argument with him, the reaction he wants and expected, but instead he watches you just sit on the ground with your eyes fixed on the ripped pieces of paper.

A part of him feels bored that this is your reaction. What happened to the foul mouth of yours back in the garden?

That was until you slowly lift your head and send him a gaze full of hate, disgust, and detestment.

It wasn't the reaction he wanted.

But when you look at him like that, he feels fulfilled.

Leona finds himself looking forward to seeing your glares each day. He finds himself amused when he sees your expression instantly darken when you catch sight of him lurking near you. He doesn't care if you do actually despise him with your entire being.

Leona would be delighted to hear that he was your number one enemy. What a shocker, the only time he wins first place is on someone's enemy list. Your death glares are his trophies.

Your eyes were the complete opposite as to what he wanted to see from Yuu, eyes that would rot and decay before they would willingly hold love and care for him.

Your eyes held so much anger and hatred for him that he can't help but feel like he's the only person in the whole world when you stared at him like that.

For once, Leona feels like he finally won first place.

Ruggie Bucchi

You... Actually don't know where to start? Sure, he's a cunning pick pocketer and has an obsession with doughnuts. What more can you say? You actually see him as a close friend, which was a surprise considering his... Awful housewarden that he serves.

Yuu wanted to watch a Spelldrive match today, mentioning how she liked seeing the colorful spells bouncing back and forth. You, of course, had to go with them. Seeing as how Leona and his Spelldrive club would be competing, you didn't want Yuu anywhere near that lousy lion.

You, Yuu, and Grim were sitting down together until Yuu had said something about being hungry and you offered to get some for the three of you. The game was on pause, as the players were taking a 15 minute break.

As you walked towards the food stands, you notice a few dandelions on the grass beside you. The plant wasn't anything noteworthy, but it just happened to steal your attention for a few seconds before you immediately turned your gaze away.

You finished paying for the snacks. You weren't exactly sure what Yuu and Grim wanted. Ah... you should've asked.. Eventually, you settled on doughnuts. The treats weren't to expensive, and the doughnuts looked too good from the display window not to buy!

A shuffling near the dandelions from earlier alerted you. You turned, praying it wasn't Leona, and instead... Saw a boy chowing down on the dandelions...? To

His features seemed familiar to you, you think you've seen him before. You realized he was one the players from the game! ...And was also Leona's right-hand man...

Confusion overrides you. Aren't the teams provided with food already? And isn't this guy being pai by myd personally by Leona? You want to just walk away but it will lay heavy on your conscience.

Reluctantly, you approached him, tapping his shoulder for his attention.

"Excuse me." You said, gaining his attention.

He turned his head, still chewing on the dandelion. "Huh?"

"Uh.. You can have this." His eyes trailed down to what you were carrying in your extended hand. "I don't think eating dandelions is good for you if I'm being honest."

"Sure it is! Been doing it for awhile now and I feel fine." He responds, making you grow concerned.

You shake the bag in your hand, "Take this."

"Whats this? A gift for me? Syehehe!" He took the bag and opened it. He was surprised to see that it contained 3 doughnuts inside. "Ya sure you want to give this to me? Spending thaumarks to replace these doughnuts won't be cheap y'know."

"You sure you wanna keep talking? Your game starts any moment now." You replied.

He grinned before biting down on the doughnuts you gave him. You eventually walked away, trying to come up with an excuse on why you didn't bring any snacks.

"Heyy! Where's the food?" Grim asked impatiently.

You smiled, "The lines were too long. We'll just get food after the game."

"Ah, okay. The game was gonna start soon anyway." Yuu moved to give you more space.

As you waited, you noticed the countdown for the start of the games had only 15 seconds left. You observed the stadium, noticing the Spelldrive club from NRC looking around hurriedly. A running figure at the corner of your eye caught you attention. You recognized him as the individual who you gave your doughnuts to.

Safe to say, he performed exceptionally well! Not like you had anything to do with his performance but you still feel like you held some credit.

You scooted closer to Yuu, asking if they knew who the hyena-like boy was.

Ruggie Bucchi.

....

Ruggie had figured to repay their kindness. It wasn't something he did often, but he felt he owe them something atleast. He also disliked feeling indebted to someone.

As he searched for you, he held a bag of doughnuts. He would be lying if he said he wasnt dissapointed that these doughnuts weren't for him.

Ruggie heard a familiar voice sounding from behind a door, a voice he adored to hear.

"What do you plan to do after you graduate from NRC?"

He opened the door to see the prefect and the person from yesterday sitting across from each other on a table.

"I'll probably train my magic more. Then, I'll try to join organizations that focuses on helping people." They spoke, sinking back on their seat.

"That's admirable." Yuu said.

"What about you?"

The prefect looked unsure, "I don't have much options to begin with... But if I could choose, I'd travel the world and document my findings as an otherworldly person." They smiled. "I barely step a foot outside of NRC. I think a job like that would suit me!"

Huh.

Weird.

Nothing like his already planned future with the prefect.

The two of them were suppose to get married, move in together, and live happily ever after. He would work hard and come home to the prefect in his arms, safe and unharmed.

That's the perfect future he planned for the both of them. How would he be able to come home to the prefect if they're out traveling the world? How would he ever guarantee their safety if he isn't near them?

Of course. Their safety is only guaranteed in his arms.

"And maybe you could come with me too?" the prefect turned to the person across from them.

They sent a small smile to the Ramshackle prefect. "I'd love to."

...

You didn't receive any doughnuts that day, and had no clue you were even suppose to receive doughnuts.

....

Ruggie planned a complete future for him and the prefect. It was perfect, and he was already saving up for when they will hold their wedding.

How would he be able to form that perfect future if the prefect left him to explore the world with that... person? The prefect should stay at home, with him. Home is where they will be free from any impurity that will stain their image.

You... you will ruin that. You will ruin everything. He orchestrated this future by the millisecond, but your influence will inspire them to do things that does not align with his idea of a perfect future.

__

You don't know why but Ruggie has been approaching you a lot as of late, and it was always when you were headed to hang out with Yuu. He always appears at the right time to drag you away and lead you somewhere else far from Yuu.

You didn't think much about it first. After all, he was easy to talk to, make jokes with, and overall friendly... Until he overdid it.

On days when you really wanted to see Yuu, you're constantly dragged away from him. Of course, there were times you refuted and explained you had to see the prefect for something important. Ruggie would agree to go get Yuu for you, but he always came back to you saying that the prefect wasn't at the spot you two planned.

On times you were able to see Yuu and inquire, they said that you took too long and they would end up leaving.

You'd make a better attempt at refuting Ruggie's attempts at dragging you away, but somehow... your body never seemed to agree with you. You try to turn and walk away from him, but your body forces you to walk besides Ruggie. The movements between you two were completely synchronized.

This has to be his UM, right? But how do you bring that up without seeming like an assumer? When you feel like you've gain control of your body again, you can hear Ruggie whisper something before you lose control once again.

You're forced to sit beside Ruggie on the grass while internally worrying for Yuu's safety. He starts talking and talking and you have no choice but to listen attentively.

Before you knew it, you and Ruggie have started meeting up more often than not. The relationship between you two deepening by the second, but you still only saw him as a close buddy. You find yourself enjoying and laughing at his jokes. This new side of Ruggie that you see wasn't like his usual playful and conniving self. He was sincere and even gentle.

On one of those meetups, you're easily pulled into a conversation about the future and whatnot. Unlike your conversation with Yuu, you actually went deeper about your plans.

Ruggie shared his own plans too, and you were surprised at how simple it was. He just wanted to be eternally together with his spouse. It's sweet, but you can't imagine being constantly around the same person at all times of day and night. When you shared that part, you notice a darkened shadow casted on his features before disappearing immediately as if you just imagined it.

...

Being constantly around the same person is tiring and repetitive? Aren't you the one who's always around the prefect?!

Don't you know how tiring it is maintaining a facade? He's sick of it! Sincere and gentle? That's nothing like him. At first he only did these meetups to force you and the prefect apart for as long as he could, but now Ruggie feels as if that plan backfired.

When did he start going to the meetups for you solely?

When did he start wishing the meetups could last all day?

Why does he feel a pang of hurt when you say you only see him as a close friend instead of your future eternal spouse?

Oh well... it's not like you even have a choice.

Ruggie has felt his carefully sculpted future with Yuu contort ever since you came into the picture. He feels as if the home he plans to live in with his beloved would suit you better. So what if you dislike being around the same person constantly? You'll just have to get used to it.

Yuu could travel the world at all times and he'd just let them be. The only thing he wants is you now after all! Syehehehe!

Jack Howl

Yuu's bodyguard.

It all started when you had to leave for the bathroom for a few minutes. When you came out, you noticed a group of students surrounding Yuu. Worry filled you as you came closer to the scene, hoping Yuu wasn't being harmed. Someone seemed to be Infront of the prefect, like they were protecting them... Is that Jack?

He scared the students away easily, and you immediately ran to Yuu for an explanation. That was until Jack blocked your way, when you were just mere meters away from the prefect.

"Do not come any closer." He commanded.

"Excuse me, I need to ask-" You tried pushing him out of the way with your arms, but it was no use with his physique.

"I said don't come any closer. Didn't you hear me the first time?" He repeated more assertively.

"Jack, they're my friend! You don't need to do that.." With Yuu's words, Jack reluctantly stepped aside. His piercing glare wasn't left unnoticed though.

You didn't waste your time on him, "Yuu, what happened earlier? Are you okay?" You patted your hands around the different parts of their body, checking for any signs of injury.

"I'm fine thanks to Jack. Those students just went up to me randomly and started bothering me... I'm not hurt though if you're still concerned."

You only sighed in response, "I hope youre telling the truth."

The prefect turned to Jack, "Thanks again, Jack. I'm not sure what I would've done, especially since Grim isn't here with me today..."

You noticed how Jack's tail started wagging at the sound of them thanking him. Talk about subtly, huh?

"Let's go now, (Name)!" Yuu said, gesturing you to follow them.

Yuu walked ahead, with you trailing behind. You stopped in your tracks right after you passed Jack.

"By the way, don't think I didnt notice your glare earlier." You said, loud and clear for him to hear. Without waiting for a response, you sped up to catch up with Yuu, who was unaware of what happened.

You definitely did not make a good first impression, but hey, what's new?

__

Ever since that encounter with you, Jack has made sure to keep you away from the prefect at all times he is near.

Jack's admiration for the prefect began when they planned how to stop and expose Leona from continuing his scheme. The prefect's highlighted intelligence and bravery enamoured Jack, and that started his little crush.

That "crush" spiraled into something deeper and twisted as Yuu started interacting with more and more people because of their heroic adventures. Jealously bubbled in him as the prefect started seeing him less and less.

Jack's idea of the prefect was someone of purity and untainted. He feared the prefect would stray away from that idea as more people start influencing them and "staining" their purity. That's when Jack started feeling the need to protect the prefect from everything that will ruin them.

The most influential person he feared would completely corrupt the prefect was you.

You were everything he didnt want in Yuu, so he made sure you were never getting near the prefect on his watch.

__

Jack has been appearing a lot more recently.

You found his appearances suspicious.. you dared say that it was convenient.

You were heading somewhere to meet up with Yuu when you bumped into Jack along the way. Remembering your last encounter, you tried to not stall the meeting. Savanaclaw wasn't really known for being welcoming and such.

"Where are you going?" Jack asks, arms crossed with a neutral expression on his face.

"I'm going to see Yuu." You replied, hoping that that would be the end of your conversation.

"Did they tell you? Crowley assigned them another task in his office. They're not free right now." He responds bluntly.

"What? They didn't mention anything about that.."

"That's what they said when I bumped into them a few minutes ago." He says, walking towards the direction you came from.

You can't bring yourself to trust Jack so easily, but he seems believable. He did just come from the direction you were originally headed. Plus, why would Jack lie about this? He appears like a serious guy, and doesn't really seem like he'd do those types of things without a reason or a plan behind it.

But he does have a plan, and you were unknowingly going along with it perfectly when you turned and left to go back to your dorm.

Awhile later, you received a text from Yuu.

Yuu: Sorry if I wasn't at there !! Crowley js gave me a task randomly and left :(

You: nah dw

You: Jack told me everything

Yuu: He did??

You: yeah while I was going to you, I bumped into him and he told me you were busy

Yuu: how did jack know Abt my task?

You: he said he bumped into you a few minutes b4 he bumped into me

Yuu: I never bumped into Jack earlier

Yuu: Crowley gave me a task and left and I just went with Grim to do the work so it wouldn't pile up

...

Jack lied and he didn't at the same time?

That's odd... why would he go out of his way to lie even if it resulted in the same outcome? It definitely wasn't necessary, but it also wasn't so perplexing that you'd start brainstorming ideas on why Jack lied.

In the end, it ended with you mindlessly texting Yuu for the next hour before sleeping comfortably on your sheets.

The following day, you were walking towards Ramshackle to walk with the prefect. Until a familiar beastman came into your sights. You didn't think the two of you had any reason to converse so you tried walking past him.

"Are you going to the prefect again?" He asks, back facing your back.

You turn your head to look behind you, "Yeah, I am."

"The prefect is sick so don't bother." He replies before walking away to the main building of NRC.

Sick? They did not seem sick last night!

Unfortunately, as much as you wanted to run towards Ramshackle and check up on their wellbeing, clock was ticking and a test was awaiting.

You eventually and reluctantly decided to walk back to class. If Jack was lying, then you'd prove that by seeing if the prefect was in class.

You scanned the room over and over but to no avail. It really does seem like Yuu had fallen I'll, was Crowley's task too intense? You figured to take care of them when classes were dismissed.

__

Jack internally celebrated the smooth flow of his plan. He was able to effectively separate the two of you naturally. If he kept this up, the relationship between you two would crumble soon enough.

Then, you'd never ever have the chance to taint the prefect's purity with your filth.

The prefect is only safe under his protection afterall. Who else would willingly drive away the wicked who wish to corrupt an angel?

Jack wishes that one day the prefect will recognize his efforts in maintaining their perfect being and express their gratitude. Maybe then he'd allow himself to embrace their warmth, to let his uncontaminated self freely bask in the serenity of their presence.

And when he allows himself the pleasure to do so, will he truly be happy.

(What a hypocrite. He dreads seeing unworthy people interact with the prefect, but wishes he could do the same without feeling guilty of tainting them.)

__

Class was dismissed and you were headed to Ramshackle, until you a familiar voice interjects, making you top in your tracks.

"Are you visiting the prefect?" Jack crossed his arms, his expression was still as stern as ever.

"Yeah, I'm gonna check up on them." You answer. You were slowly growing suspicious of Jack. Why does he keep asking about your whereabouts?

"You shouldn't. Grim told me the prefect wasn't in the mood to be in anyone's presence, including Grim." Jack explained, quickly shutting down your plans of visiting Ramshackle.

You thought about it for a moment before leaving. As much as you worried about Yuu, you knew they had their intense moments of stress. Times like those were much better comforted with solitude rather than company.

You planned to visit the next after class when... Jack conveniently told you something that shit down your plans instantly. And again, and again, before you knew it, it was already the end of the week!

You were becoming insanely anxious about Yuu's health, and Jack was no help at all! Honestly, why do you even just go along with his words anyway? It was so unlike you! The pit in your stomach worsens when the prefect has yet to message you for almost a week.

As soon as class was officially dismissed, you made a bee line towards Ramshackle and you swore nothing will stop you.

A familiar white headed man was in your path as usual, but you weren't going to leave now unlike before. "You're going to see the-"

"No! Just shut up!" You snapped, immediately causing Jack to shut his mouth.

His brows arched, seemingly agitated. "What was that for?"

"I need to go to Ramshackle!"

"You do know it's pointless? I already said it many times before. The prefect does not want to be in the company of anyone else-"

"And I don't care! They may not want to be in the company of anyone else, but they need someone to take care of them!" You locked eyes with him. "You are not stopping me this time!" You retorted, jogging away from him and towards the wooden building in the distance.

Jack stood there, stunned. He guesses his plan wasn't as perfected as he assumed it to be.

But it wasn't just that that left him stunned, it was that desperate look in your eyes when your pupils locked. The look of complete desperation and distress.

Maybe he saw himself in you. The pulsing urge to find out whether the prefect was okay or not. That's how he always felt whenever an overblot occurs and Yuu always happens to be involved. Distress fills Jack as he searches for Yuu in the aftermath of the disaster, only to see people crowding the prefect.

In truth, Jack barely interacted with the prefect. As their popularity skyrocketed, the prefect started becoming more and more like an untouchable deity in his eyes. No one was worthy of their presence, some were just lucky to be chosen as a close companion.

When he saw that look of desperation in your eyes, he thought you looked utterly pathetic.. The prefect was only sick for a week and you were getting so worked up over it. You were lucky to be chosen as a close companion, but you still weren't worthy of ever being near the prefect in his eyes.

Seeing you in that state made him realize something.

Perhaps somewhere deep in Jack's twisted devotion, he knew his desperate yearnings for the prefect was of no use. And he deluded himself into thinking you didn't feel good enough for the prefect as well.

Tainted and desperate just like him.

Jack felt afraid to come close to the prefect because he might've stained their being. But he didn't feel that with you. He didn't feel the need to suppress himself near you.

Like him, you were stained. You both weren't worthy of the perfect deity, but you two also weren't dirt filthy like the rest.

Perhaps only the two of you could make a perfect pair.

___

Omg I am so sorry I took this long djjdkshdneej it's not even that good oml

I've been so busy it was insane but I'm so happy I was able to finish this

Btw jack is describing you in his perspectives so that's why it gets kinda deep and yeah yk dhdhsksjksks

Thanks to anyone who actually waited that long for this😭

People who want to be tagged: @fancyhawk45

@brights-place @avalordream

@kthehoeforfictionalmen @flowershrivelledbareof-fragrance @boredselkie @xenonissilly @littlepenguinheart @gl00muraaii @owl778

@yourloreleihere @dreamlessnight @minkuro

@kokonuthead @valentinaagarcia @tonponton @nebulabunni3 @moonie-saysbleb3 @3lliesan @valer1esgallery

[glitchy1938]

(Same anon who asked for the reader who gets visions) oooo I loved the reader who gets visions post, you really know how to make a vision take flight

Sorry for requesting again, but I’ve got another idea floating in my mind. You don’t have to write this if it is too detailed of a concept :)

What about a reader who is a friend and fellow virtue of the ancients or beasts (they’re my favorite groups I’m sorry) and desperately craves to be acknowledged as worthwhile, not exactly jealous and will never say it but they feel like they are never recognized for all the work they do, so obviously they need to do more! And they begin to slowly corrupt with visible cracks throughout their dough, and they start getting more resentful, refusing to stop their work because they think their friends want to steal the glory for themselves, as they are actively destroying themself.

It took a while but I made it, I also made with my OC if that's okay.

Even If I'm Crumbling..... I Need More...!!

[Ancients & Beasts x reader]

Pure Vanilla Cookie

• You were his closest friends with White lily Cookie, and he really appreciate that you want to know more about everything.

• But he feel... Something else in you... Like, everytime he get better at something, you want to surpass him, he didn't quite get it at first...

• You never admit it to him, or anyone, but the more he get of acknowledgement, the more you feel you NEEDED to do more.

• You started to work even more harder then before, even not eating, drinking or getting any sleep ! That doesn't matter to you. All you needed what to prove to everyone that they recognise your hard work.

• Pure Vanilla tried everything... To at least make you eat, drink or get a sleep. But you deny all of that. Saying that you had to surpass yourself more and more and they won't take all your glory to themselves.

• He didn't want to force you, but that change when you saw that your Doug start to slowly crumble.

• This time, he stayed with you all time, refusing to leave your side and forcing you to take care of yourself. He didn't care that you'll hate them, all he wanted was for you to come back to your sense...!!

Hollyberry Cookie

• She's the one who saw first that you truely change, yes, it's good to surpass yourself, but not until you crumble !!

• You're one of her dearest friends and she can't stand seeing you refuse to take care of yourself and only wanted to be more stronger than her to get more glory.

• She'll force you to, even if it means locking your room with her so she'll be here with you and make sure that you won't die of working yourself until death !!

• She will not allow it.

Dark Cacao Cookie

• Now, this man will be impressed by all your work, telling you that you did great. But... That wasn't enough for you.

• As a king, he know that all eyes are on him when he do something impressing. So he doesn't get it why you so need to do more.

• You wanted to take away his crown ? No, he knew you didn't... Than why ?? Why working so hard into the aren to prove you're strong ?

• He didn't want to interrupt you at first, but it's when Caramel Arrow Cookie informed him that you passed out in the training area and your Doug was slowly crumble that he take it seriously.

• He won't listen to your pleading or order to let you go training again, for crumble yourself even more ?!? DON'T YOU SEE WHAT'S HAPPENED TO YOU ?!!

• He'll order his servent or even himself to take care of you. It doesn't matter of you don't want to, he won't lose you like he almost lost his kingdom.

Golden Cheese Cookie

• This diva will NOT tolerate that you're willing to give your life just to prove yourself more.

• Yes, she's greedy and love gold and her kingdom, and also the fame and glory, but she know what's more important and take care of yourself.

• She doesn't allow you go to found the most important treasure or something, she won't let you get hurt or killed.

• She'll pemper you for your hard work every time you're about to do more or your Doug is about to crumble more.

White Lily Cookie

• She's also working herself to get forgiven by the other Ancients, but she's very worried about you.

• She always find yous still in your desk because she's also working a little more ay Night time but seeing there with more knowledge books beside than before, where you there the hole time ?!?

• She doesn't want to force you, she take your hands and pleaded you to stop your work, you only hurt yourself more !!

• If that doesn't work.... She'll apologize but dragged you in your bed and laying on top of you so that you won't escaped.

• She'll hug you tightly as you told her that you won't let her take your work, she doesn't care about that !! SHE CARE ABOUT YOU GOD DAMN IT !!!

• She'll give you all the medecin you need to recover, and to your mental health is back to a normal cookie work.

• She doesn't want to lose you please !!

Sweet Bleu Chocola Cookie (aka Zakia)

• She already saw the Doug started to crumble when she saw you working harder then before. She immediately start to heal you injuries and taking you to your chambers.

• She maybe sweet and all, but she won't let some glory get the better of her friends, and specially not you.

• She'll even ask her uncle or sister to the throne until she's SURE that you'll stop working yourself too hard !!

• If you say to her that she won't take your work away from you, she'll cry and for the first time yell at you to stop your none sence !! DID SHE EVER VALUE GLORY MORE THAN FRIENDSHIP AND LOVE ?!?

• You'll be stuck with her until you recover, end of story.

The Beasts

Shadow Milk Cookie

• Well this man is... already interested in your hard working self, and almost happy that you see him as glory as he also see himself... that, is until he saw your Doug start to crumble.

• He won't tell you to stop, oooh no, he'll just dragge you into his chamber and give you What you need to stop.

• He won't take "no" for an answer when he ask for you to eat or sleep. You'll need all your strength if you want to recover.

• He's not the best at comforting, but you can see that he's trying to.

• His minions also are worried about you, believe it or not.

• Candy Apple Cookie pleaded her master to let her take care of you, seeing you like that makes her heart broke... Same with Black Saphire Cookie, his mission is to look out for you when you try to work again.

• He get it that you want to clam glory for your hard work, but it's not like that that you'll succeed.

Burning Spice Cookie

• This man, as we all know, is THE working cookie then anyone, and he push his army or anyone else who can be useful.

• He's proud to see you working more and more of yourself when your in the training area. But he saw the Doug slowly crumble too...

• He didn't ask you to stop or go get rest, he ORDERED you to stop. But of course, you didn't listen.

• He'll have to dragree you by picking you like a potato bag on his shoulder while you scream at him to let go of you.

• He doesn't care if you try to fight back, the last thing he want is you die because you didn't take care of yourself.

Mystic Flour Cooke

• She's the cookie of Empathy, but that doesn't mean that she's not worried about your health.

• She get it that you want to prouve yourself more, but if that mean you'll die of this, she won't accept it.

• She'll directly tell you to stop and get rest IMMEDIATELY. And if you're being stubber and refuse, she'll take you hand like a child and won't listen to your pleading to let you work

• She'll scold you for pushing yourself just for glory. Saying that it will only hurt you more than it'll give.

Red Chocola Cookie

• This girl won't listen to you saying that you need to know more or be more strong.

• she'll force you to stop doing what ever your doing to go to bed and to think of nothing else.

• The glory must really take your head, did you think she need fame or glory ? hell she'll think you go crazy because of it.

• Even if she's married and want to see her sister and brother, she'll ask- no... Order her husband (Fallacy) to send letters to her sister and brother, and cancel any work or duty she has.

• She'll give you the best medecin you need to recover, food, water, anything you need for stop hurting yourself more.

[hyperlexichypatia]

Okay, here's my criticism of this post I keep seeing -- and no, it's not what you think. I know, my longtime followers who know the kinds of things I post about a lot are probably thinking, "Oh, I know what their objection is going to be. It's going to be that 18-19 year olds are adults who can date older partners if they choose to." But no, that's not it this time! Yes, I do believe it's fine for young adults to date older adults if they choose to (and am accordingly rolling my eyes at all the "This should go up to 25!" comments in the notes), but. That's not my issue here. In fact, precisely because I believe that young adults dating older adults is morally neutral, I'm not at all concerned about the efficacy of the messaging against it. My concern is that underage minors being in sexual/romantic relationships with adults is actually harmful and dangerous, and therefore young people actually should be warned against it, and this is not an effective warning.

Fellow old people, do y'all remember being 14? At all? Would you have found this warning effective and compelling at that age?

I for sure would not! I did not! Quite the opposite!

Put yourself in the young person's position here. You have no rights. You're treated as someone with no agency. Your parents, teachers, government, and society as a whole treats you as some combination of "nuisance," "ticking time bomb," and "unthinking blob." Developmentally, you're at a phase of life when you should be transitioning to a more adult role, but everyone around you demonizes you for that desire. All your thoughts, feelings, and opinions are dismissed as the inconsequential ravings of Just A Dumb Kid Who Doesn't Know Any Better. You meet someone who treats you with basic human politeness, tells you that he likes you and that you're mature, actually treats you like you have two brain cells to rub together. Of course you're going to be drawn to him. And then when other adults warn you that obviously of course he doesn't really like you, that's impossible, of course you're not really mature, no one could possibly see you that way; actually you're naive and incapable of making your own decisions, and the way your parents/teachers/society treat you is completely justified. Are you going to heed those warnings?

Why are adults absolutely constitutionally incapable of giving good, necessary advice to teenagers without fucking insulting them in the process? Of course teenagers don't listen to it! Why would anyone??

"Oh, well, of course teenagers don't listen, because they're stubborn, and immature, and biologically determined to make bad decisions, which is all the more reason they need to be controlled," say adults, completely oblivious to the actual problem.

When I was a teenager, the big moral panic at the time was teen pregnancy, and we were all inundated with the least effective cautionary tales in the world: "If you get pregnant as a teen, you'll have to leave your parents' care and function as an adult!" Which left every girl who'd intentionally gotten pregnant for the explicit purpose of escaping her abusive parents saying "Yeah, that was the goal." And every girl who was looking for a way of escaping her abusive parents to think "What a great idea!" Today the big moral panic is older partners, but if the appeal of an older partner is that he treats you like someone capable of making your own decisions, why would you be persuaded by a counterargument of "Don't listen to him, of course you're not capable of making your own decisions!"?

Again. I'm saying this because I agree that adults dating minors is a bad thing and that minors should be warned against it. EFFECTIVELY.

That said, this is my advice to any 17-or-younger person being pursued by an 18+-year-old partner: Listen. You deserve so much better than the way society treats you. You deserve to be taken seriously. You deserve to make your own decisions in life. You have a mind of your own, and people should recognize that instead of treating your pesky "free will" as a personal affront or an inconvenient glitch. You can and should think for yourself. You deserve, and I hope you have, relationships with older people who validate those truths about you. However. You are still legally and materially powerless. I don't have to tell you that. You live it every day. Someone older than you -- and therefore, inherently, legally, more powerful than you -- should not be trying to extract things from you. Money, sex, unpaid labor, anything of value. Someone more powerful than you who truly values you, values your friendship, values you as a person, will be mindful of your status and not try to extract anything from you. Cross-age friendships are good. Older people can and should genuinely like and appreciate you, and you can and should genuinely like and appreciate them. But if they try to extract anything from you, run away.

[corevibeself]

Wʜᴀᴛ ᴀɴɪᴍᴀʟ sᴘɪʀɪᴛ ɪs ɢ��ɪᴅɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ʀɪɢʜᴛ ɴᴏᴡ? 🌾🐇

How to pick a pile: Close your eyes and take a deep breath. once grounded, choose the image that pulls you in. Don't overthink it!

This is a short reading with a one-card pull, because I had some time on my hands to post it <3

Ｐｉｌｅ １ 🦅

You guys got the Falcon!

So, what I'm getting from this card is that you might be waiting on some type of opportunity or scoping out something you will choose. The Falcon spirit is guiding you right now, helping you narrow down a few things.

Falcons have sharp eyes and are great hunters. You might notice their guidance through a random impulse to do something that feels important, or you may see more opportunities appearing in front of you that you wouldn't have noticed before. They're broadening your perspective, is what I'm getting. The falcon wants you to snatch up whatever opportunity you set your sights on!

Don't worry about missing these opportunities—falcons have incredible eyesight. They'll make it clear to you.

Ｐｉｌｅ ２ 🐘

You guys got the Elephant!

Elephants are literally one of the most emotionally intelligent animals on this planet. If you've been going through a lot emotionally or feeling like a caretaker for others, this animal is here to help ground you to your own inner guidance and help with emotional release and being open with people.

You might notice their guidance through a sudden urge to take care of yourself, or a burst of wisdom that comes at just the right moment. Stay true to yourself—that is your strength at the moment. Stay authentic and open. I just remembered how elephants are afraid of mice, even though they're so small compared to them; what I intuitively felt from that was that whatever issue or fear you're faced with, you can handle it; you've got the strength to.

It can also be a reminder that the issue is actually smaller than how it feels, but your feelings are valid; that's why the elephant is encouraging you to be more vulnerable, because I'm seeing that friends or family could be a great source of support right now, so open up. Elephants work together.

Ｐｉｌｅ ３ 🦉

You guys got the Owl!

Have ya'll been staying up late? Lol.

I'm seeing someone in bed with anxious thoughts, unable to sleep—maybe because of a specific situation that's keeping them up at night.

Guys, the owl is here to help you see through the bullshit. Notice how owls are quiet as hell and then just ask, Who? Like, girl, you already know who. Stop acting clueless, HA! This guide is helping you see things more clearly—things you may have been unsure about. It’s also serving as a discerner, helping you filter through what’s real and what’s not.

This is a time of release—finding out something about a friend, having realizations, uncovering truths. These revelations have a purpose, and you need to be aware of them because we’re seeing past the fog.

Just like owls can turn their heads 360 degrees, if you think you know or see everything right now, turn your head a bit. That’s what this owl is guiding you to do.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hope you enjoyed the reading! It was really fun to make! hehehe xxx<3

[disgruntleddemon]

part of what i hate about billford (among many other things) is the way it assassinates everyone else's characters in the process. It's especially teue for post cannon, but it annoys me in general

A good chunk of Ford's arc is overcoming the abuse Bill put him through, regardless if you view their original relationship as romantic or not. Tbob only further cemented that arc For Ford.

The shame he feels at the idea of his family knowing the full extent of what happened, the relief he feels when they dont judge him, the guilt he feels at pretty much anything bill related, the "i found my happiness and it looks like this" page, the j3 page where he bonds with his family by burning all the old bill relics, having to overcome his trust issues, bill almost killing Ford's whole family and destroying the world, the torture he goes through in j3 and weirdmaggedon, etc

To throw all that away for "silly toxic yaoi. They just need couples therapy teehee" just cheapens everything! So many damn scenarios where Ford's forced to play nice and babysit his literal abuser played as romantic tension is gross! I get it's ppl just having fun or whatever, but it's such a reductive take on his character

And then of course you have the way everyone else gets rewritten to some make billford work. It's so ooc it might as wll be ocs.

Like, Mabel, for instance. She watched Bill posses her brother, try to kill him, hurt him, found the note Bill left saying he'd fake Dipper's suicide (ending the note with "wanna join him, shooting star?), was trapped in the bubble, etc. You think she of all people is gonna be making friendship bracelets with him and shipping him with her grunkle?????

Yes, she's a pretty forgiving person, but she's just as willing to hold a grudge. ESPECIALLY if you hurt her family!

The same applies to all the other characters. Why do they bend over backwards to be nice to bill? Why would they ever approve of Bill and Ford getting together??? It goes against everything they stand for and believe. Why do they suddenly stop caring about their family as soon as bill is involved??? When the show is aggressively about the importance of family????

It's like a worse version of gravity falls where everything is written around billford, and i just don't get the appeal.

[fiamat12]

Re: Nic's Bafta Nomination

1st congrats to Nic. I haven't watched BM yet but I'm sure it's well deserved. She's had a big year, personally and professionally. When it rains it pours, eh? 👫👶 😍🏆🤑

2nd, frustration is at an all time high in shipperville today! I'm afraid people care less about this nom and more about her young, actor friend group stealing her thunder. I FEEL YOU. Let's take a step back and try to understand a few things:

• I think they're genuinely happy for her. Have you ever seen the post below of DB & friends sitting around the TV cheering when another friend won a BAFTA? It's an excitable/ supportive bunch. I'd love to have this friend group 🧡

• Imo, they're N's legit friends, so they will always post for her/ about her. JD is guilty of being the decoy/PR bf who was a bit too trigger-happy w/ his story (which makes it worse when Lukola hasn't launched yet). But if you're WITH someone, you don't need to post a thing. You're THERE when it's announced like L was - prob. hugging N, as she was clearly in tears. 🥹

• As long as Lukola hasn't launched, N is going to/ HAS to repost JD. L was just "with" A days ago. It's def a sh*tty situation, but we also have to recognize that they got themselves into this mess... N likely wanted the break, then L let A into his friend group w/out thinking then prob. (unintentionally) led her on. Then A got starry-eyed then jilted, then greedy. Then Lukola got super in love & horny. And here we are! 📝

•Take it from another OG shipper: @lukolabrainrot - "I get why people are frustrated but I think it's mainly because L/N haven't gone public yet, and people are just tired which is totally valid. It's been a long haul with very little payback since like October... Minus the SAGs of course." ✨️

Take a deep breath, touch some grass if needed or stay, vent & take the small wins as they come. We know L's playbook now and that farce can't go on forever 🤷🏼‍♂️. I'm not sure how they'll handle the Baftas ceremony - they're still nominated for the "Memorable Moment" and I'm sure L will want to be around to mix & mingle and to support wifey...

Here's N's nom post below & Camilla's story:

[ilikerafayelwaytoomuch]

How the LADS guys are at Mario Kart

A/n: thanks for all the love on my last post, it was super unexpected but I love and appreciate all of you 💕

For some reason I was thinking about how the LADS boys would be at Mario kart....

₊˚ ‿︵‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊

Rafayel

Gets SO into it but isn't the best player out there

It doesn't matter that you're dating him, he will be so competitive and try his hardest to beat you

You're also competitive when playing Mario kart? It's a good thing Raf's got his own island because y'all would for sure be getting a noise complaint

"what the hell, Mario?!" "HA! Suck my dick, Toad!" "Baby how could you?!" "Take that little fucker!"

Non stop shouting at the screen and each other, especially if you made him slip on a banana peel and take over his place...he feels so betrayed

After playing will realize all the things he's just said and/or called you and will apologize, making sure you know he didn't mean any of it

But pull that shit on him again and you're done

₊˚ ‿︵‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊

Sylus

Never played the game but somehow beats everyone at it

The twins and you made a bet on how Sylus would be at Mario kart. You totally lost because he's actually so good

Easily wins first place.every.single.time

Almost frustrates you and the twins (y'all will shit talk behind his back later dw) because how is this noob beating all of you

Doesn't even need to use any items. Wins by pure talent

You and the twins plot his demise, using every item you could on him and he still manages to win

"this isn't hard at all, I don't know why you all can't keep up"

Way too smug about it too, making the three of you vow to never let him play again

Would be slightly offended the next time he watches you and the twins playing it without him

Distract him with a kiss and he'll forget all about it

₊˚ ‿︵‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊

Zayne

Incredible at the game due to a previous obsession with it

Knows all the shortcuts and controls to place in every race

Literally looked up all the tips he could online to get good at the game

Will teach you all of his tricks and tips to win

"there's a shortcut on this map here" "how do I go so fast? You have to drift like this"

Drifting is too hard to learn and you almost give up, but he encouraged you to keep going

Slowly, you get better at the game

He's so proud and is high-fiving you when he places 1st and you 2nd

The day you finally beat him in the race?

Heart explodes at watching you stand up, cheering and mocking him

"HA, the student becomes the master, take that!"

Just might have to let you win more often to see that smile again

₊˚ ‿︵‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊

Xavier

I think he's the most chill out of the guys

Isn't good, but also isn't bad, getting around 5-6 place

It's a cosy night y'all are playing together, enjoying your time off

Then suddenly I feel like he'd get ultra competitive

The race was going as good as the rest, but Xavier shouting "OH MY GOD THAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?!" Threw you off

Probably start laughing at his sudden outburst, teasing him

He'd shrug it off saying it was necessary because Bowser was a dick and caused him to place 8th

Basically just a chill guy playing Mario kart

But will randomly have an outburst screaming and cursing at a NPC for ruining the game

At least it's funny to watch

₊˚ ‿︵‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊

Caleb

Like Zayne, super good at the game

But he's good for 2 reasons. The first is he knows the same tricks as Zayne. The second is this man literally looked up cheat codes to ensure that he'd win

Him and Zayne were both into Mario kart at the same time and took it very seriously

Caleb refused to lose to Zayne, so he hacks

You recalled Caleb being godly at Mario kart as kids

He'd always win. Every race. No matter who he was against.

So when you decided to play it again, you were surprised he kept losing to you

Little did you know, he was letting you win. Making sure to place just behind you, winning only occasionally

"damn you suck at this now" "maybe you've just gotten better pipsqueak"

He just wanted to see you smile for beating him at the game

Anytime he plays Mario kart with anyone else though, they're going down

You two are playing with coworkers? He'll hack so that the two of you beat everyone

[echolynn13]

Okay, I finally got to watch today's video, so here's the not-quite-live commentary/chaotic highlights post I promised about it :)

Not entirely video related, but I love that as usual, I see a bunch of people in the comments saying "Woah I never knew AJ stood for Alexander Jeremy" while I'm here like. I don't think I've ever heard any of them refer to Tom as Thomas before this intro. Do they normally introduce him that way and I just never noticed or-?

Eve is an icon, love the vibes going from "oh fuck" in response to "what is your name?" to her pulling a "your mum" on Sam. Got her confidence back real quick there

Not to mention the fact they actually used 'your mum' as the stimulus-

"My mum is lovely" *5 seconds later* "You ring the bell, I don't want to" Something is telling me her mom isn't that lovely

AJ saying the name Martha, trying to figure out who it would make sense for Martha to be, and then giving up by saying his character panicked. Love it

"She's a massive *bleep*" Censors aren't allowing me to hear Tom say 'bitch' and I won't stand for it

I saw a comment say it as a joke, but it really was funny how Sam kept saying change until Luke made them a straight couple (calling Tom's character 'Suzanne') lmao

Darren: "Listen, I'm gonna win her over, okay?" Suzanne, about to sob: "yeah-?"

The whole coming onto Suzanne's mom bit was gold "He's coming onto me" "Sorry I'm panicking" "Why am I coming onto my mom??" "You're panicking!"

"I wish I had his muscles.." "Oh you'll catch up with me, don't worry" Tom you're so fucking funny-

The slight hesitation from Luke at the 'men' suggestion, followed by all of the other three being like "Fuck yeah, let's complain about men" is so good and lowkey reminds me of Tom's vs everyone else's reaction to the Evil-Make-A-Wish-Kid title

"Because you have one thing on your mind" "Yeahhh" "Podcasts" "🤨"

"Take 2 steps towards your progress" is the new "Today embarks on change"

Legendary Letters/Time Warp crossover we didn't know we needed

Words can't describe how much I expected and wanted the last line to be "Now you are our bitch" goddamnit-

Sam entering the scene, eating a large block of cheese while moaning, and waiting for another character to interrupt him, only for AJ to fuck it up immediately upon doing so, this is what we love to see

Something about Sam going "I love cheese :D" makes me very happy

"No one wants me to say" He's right, I absolutely do not want him to say what's so different, not while knowing SFTH's history with dairy products

I know everyone's been saying this, but yeah Sydney is definitely cosplaying as Sam in this video and I respect that

Luke's character quickly becoming problematic throughout Pillars is great. First he's unfaithful, then he's saying 'gay people' and 'the t-word', and by the end he apparently represents all of the world's problems smh

"I'll just sign this myself and do it in your writing" Heathers: father's will edition

Speaking of him, are we gonna acknowledge that he's trans-? "When I gave birth to you, do you know what I said to your mother?" Because none of the guys mentioned it, which is unlike them

"Daddy, I just want a fucking hug!" The first uncensored 'fuck' in the video!

Tom describing AJ's Tindr profile while AJ tells him to shut the fuck up-

"Sorry Mum!" a necessary apology from Sam, although at this point in his career I feel like it has a lot of ground to cover-

Thought for a second we were gonna get another one of Sam's iconic animal characters. But instead we got a surprise Henry VIII reference??

All in all, good shit as always, though the censorship did throw me off, idk what that's about-

[lamardeuse]

write your name on every blank page

by lamardeuse

911 || Buck/Eddie, Eddie & Christopher, Eddie & Buck & Christopher || Rated M || c. 11000 words

aka my contribution to the Eddie in El Paso post 8x11 fic wave, posted less than 24 hours before we get canon Eddie in El Paso :D

Eddie sets out for El Paso with his truck and a rented trailer full of essential items and valuables, the patio furniture the movers had forgotten to take and seven years' worth of mementos to remind him of that time he briefly escaped his parents' sphere of influence.

“I'm sorry you're going to have to buy a new bed,” he says as he and Buck stand in the doorway of his – well, soon to be Buck's bedroom.

“Yeah, there's no way I was going to fit a California King in here,” Buck says. “But it's fine. The mattress was getting kind of – uh, worn out.”

“I bet,” Eddie mutters. “Anyway, I'm sorry you've ended up with such a downgrade.”

Buck shrugs. “I don't see it that way. Your place is a lot more spacious overall. It has a yard. And it's just – nicer.”

“Is it?” Eddie makes a face. “Come on, the loft was cool.”

“Yeah, well, that isn't the selling point it was when I was twenty-six,” Buck murmurs. “The loft hasn't felt like home for a long time. Your house – it's got that warm feeling, you know?”

Eddie's breath catches in his throat at the thought of Buck rattling around this place alone, trying to find a warmth that left the day Christopher did. Trying to summon the ghosts of what they once were to one another, of what they might have been if –

“Buck, I –”

“Yeah?” Buck says softly, and Eddie can't look at him, he can't.

Instead, he turns and nods toward Chris' door. “At least you've got an extra room now. What're you going to do with it, turn it into a gym?”

“Nah. I thought I'd – uh. Make it into a guest bedroom so I can babysit Jee-Yun here, and have it for when you and Christopher come back for a visit. I can get one of those beds with the extra mattress that slides out and – anyway, I have a couple of ideas.”

“Oh,” Eddie says, because it's either that or bust out crying. “Well, you know, it might be a few months before I can even think of getting away from the – the work I have to do to the house, and the new job.”

“Good,” Buck says airily, “'cause putting together Ikea furniture is a real pain in the ass, it'll probably take me at least that long to figure out the directions.”

That startles a laugh out of Eddie, which he imagines was the point. “So, what time you want me at your place in the morning to help you pack?”

Buck scratches at the back of his neck. “I've been thinking about that. You need to be on the road early if you want to get to El Paso before Christopher goes to bed. The movers aren't coming til Thursday, so I can take my time.”

Eddie frowns. “You're saying you don't want my help?”

“I'm saying I want you to – not have one more thing to worry about,” Buck says, shoving his hands in his pockets. “I'll see you at six-thirty to load up, okay?”

“Sure, yeah,” Eddie says, suddenly struck by the thought that in a little over ten hours he'll be saying goodbye to Buck. There's so much to say and no time left to say it, not that he has any idea where to start. But even if he did, what would be the point? He might never be coming back to L.A., not to live.

It's not nothing, he'd said, and even that had felt ripped from him, a confession he needed to make for himself as much as for Buck. He can't afford to be more selfish than that, because no matter how anyone standing in this near-empty house feels, Christopher needs a father more than Buck needs Eddie – and maybe even more than Eddie needs Buck. It's simple math, the alligator eating the greater number like they taught you in grade school. But if that's true, why does he feel like the one being consumed, devoured, erased from existence?

Buck hesitates for a moment, his gaze assessing. They should hug, just like Eddie had hugged Hen and Chim and Bobby. But maybe they both know it could get messy, and the last thing either of them needs right now is more mess.

In the end, Buck awkwardly says his goodbyes and leaves. Of course, Buck being Buck, he turns up right on time the next morning in the pouring rain with his big smile and his big arms and his enormous heart and a dozen freshly-baked protein cookies. The hug they'd avoided the night before seems a little less dangerous in the light of day, at least until Buck's arms wrap around him, warm and strong.

Eddie's smile as Buck's warm breath tickle the rain-chilled skin of his neck feel like it's trying to smother him. Time's up, and all he can do in the end is keep that smile stuck to his face while he gasps for air beneath it.

As Eddie's passing San Bernadino on the I-10, he reaches into the bag for one of the cookies and savors it slowly, letting the chocolate melt on his tongue.

When the silent tears start falling, he's not even surprised.

read the rest at the AO3

[lgbtlunaverse]

saw that qin su post and i literly dont think i could ever make out exactly WHY jgy felt he needed to kill his child or if he didnt why did he have to die? like if people found out would that really.....im not laughing but would that rly even be that bad?? like would people really care considering all about his father, their own sexual exploits, and how generally messed up powerfulrich peopls sex lives usually are anyways?? like was there something about the child like did he have a disability due to incest, but even then why would that mean he has to die lol they couldve just hidden him away and tell everyone he died! or just say hes not ~fit~ to be the heir so then he could just have another one lol?? or just have a child with a concubine and name him heir?? do you remember/know the reason or was it like paranoia or shame or

There is a big difference between jgy and his father. Jin Guangshan is the rightful Noble-born sect leader of the richest sect in the Jianghu, and Jin Guangyao is a bastard son of a whore who was thrown down a flight of stairs as a child for the crime of showing up to his father's house, and the reaction by the cultivation world at large to this news was that he had it coming and he should've known his place.

I would say that incest and cheating have a different level of taboo, yes. Of it turned out Jin Guangshan had accidentally slept with his half sister that would have been more of a scandal than every single one of his previous exploits ever were, and the child would suffer most of all.

But the nobles of the jianghu don't see jgy as one of their own. They see him as fundamentally an outsider who they tolerate because he's good at his job, has access to money, and keeps his public record so clean they don't have anything to say about him except for his parentage. The moment he slips up they'll pounce on him like piranhas. Which... they do! We dont have to speculate about how they'd react, we see them do it in the story, with calls for his death and lurid glee, attributing his sexual deviancy to his mother's profession. What else could you expect form the son of a whore?

Did A-song have a disability? Maybe, we're told he was a bit slow, but it was subtle enough that no one thought anything of it (certainly not that the cause could be incest) before the news came out. But maybe it was more severe behind closed doors, and the only reason the rumours are so mild its that jgy has worked very, very hard to keep them that way. Who knows!

Why didn't jgy fake a-song's death? who knows! Too many loose ends? An actual dead child means no one to come back one day to ask his parents on why they sent him away, nor any caretakers you'd have to keep quiet.

Have another one? With who? His sister-wife?? (you name this and the concubine as different options so I can only assume)

So why not a concubine? Well, jgy has a chip on his shoulder about cheating and refuses to be unfaithful to Qin Su, even in ways that his society would condone. Especially if it would involve disinheriting his legitimate son in favor of the concubine's child which would basically be spitting directly in his wife's face.

But... A-Song was never the heir. Jin Ling was. Jin Guangyao was only ever acting sect leader until Jin Ling came of age. Jgy didn't need an heir, hence why he didn't need to have another child after A-song died.

So do I remember what this precise reasons were? no! And I never knew! Because no one does! It's left so unclear in the story on purpose, to leave us speculating just like the character are. Because mdzs is a story about how much you can, and can't, know another person. And so it deprives us of crucial information intentionally. jgy clearly feels responsible in some way, but that still leaves a wide variety of possible scenarios, which as I say in the post I love to play around with. (Maybe that other sect leader really did kill rusong but jgy had prior knowledge that that was likwly and still let it happen?) But anything confirmed? Zilch. Nada. We don't know why he did it, we don't even know if he did it. All we have is rumours.

[anotheroceanid]

don't be shy, post the long text

Since you asked, I'm posting it here xD

I hope this make sense.

The Aspect of Gods In My Fics or Why There's No Aspect of Gods in My Fics)

For context:

This covers all my fics and aus, though I currently have only posted TTG and WTHB. Unless I ever state otherwise, this is always my approach to the theme.

I first read the Riordanverse books as a kid, and then the only books available were the og PJO series, Heroes of Olympus and The Kane Chronicles. Only when I was much older I would find out about the new series, and I decided not to read them because I don't really like interacting with new canon content of media I enjoyed as a kid. I had bad experiences. The only one that I interact a little more is TOA, but just from a fandom perspective (I've read fics about it, but they were all Perpollo). Therefore, as I do not have any knowledge over these series, I'm not considering them here. Mostly because I might be the person to bend canon the most, but I make sure I really know canon to do it. Since I don't know canon of those stories, I never engage with them "seriously".

More or less in the same topic: in my fics, I don't consider the existences of multiple pantheons. The only gods that exist are the gods I'm writing about (mostly because I feel counterproductive unless I’m writing crack fics). This is another talk, thought I might've mentioned it every now and then. I just feel like the actions of the characters actions lose impact if there's a whole new apocalypse happening the next week with another pantheon. Like, I don't like shared universes. In general. Polly, Barbie and Max Steel all belong to Mattel. I don't need them all together in the same universe.

Most important of all: this ain’t an attack to Rick or the canon. This is just me being a silly ficwriter and picking what I think makes more sense when I’M writing my NON-PROFIT stories in my own free time. It's literally not that deep.

So, before anything else, let's touch on the subject of fading, because fading and the aspects are, in my vision, two elements that bleed into each other.

Fading, in canon, happens when a god or a monster is forgotten by humanity (or when their domains are diminished, like happened with Pan). What I will say know sounds terrible pessimistic, but I don't like mortals having this deep influence in the gods existence.

As I'm considering the gods as being the only gods, then they exist much before humanity. And I'm pretty sure Prometheus didn't make us powerful enough to do anything that damaging against gods. We can be annoying or amusing? Yeah, pretty much. But to the point they need us to remember them to exist. Nope. Not at all.

I do like that gods can fade, but in a more "they've been so emotionally damaged that they ceased to exist" way. Like, Pan saw all the things that he loved being destroyed, that must been affected him beyond the "destroyed realm" level.

Now, about the aspects. First of all, I want to remember everyone that there wasn't an unified Greek in ancient time, and while they shared similarities they were not all the same. Their gods were not the exact same. Or their cults, etc.

When I'm reading stories with Roman vs Greek aspects, I let suspension of disbelief do it's magic. But not when I'm writing, because I start to think: what about the other hundreds of aspects? It's not like religion was unified for either Greeks or Romans. And while one can use the excuse of "they also changed by what modern people think of them", because again… Who's deciding it? Who's "modern people" in question? Because the world is waaay to big to pick one place's point of view and stick with it.

In a way, I do think that the gods changed with time, but they lived thousands of years, they interacted with multiple people and their culture, of course they'd change. We as human change from school to collage, why can't they change after living through literally everything? (Also, it's interesting that even if they changed, they're the same to their core, but I won't enter in this topic here.)

Their interactions with mortals might have affected them somehow, but not so deep they have different personalities that clash with each other. Humans can worship them in different ways, I simply think the gods care more about being honoured and worshipped than how it's done. If it is something they find offensive, then okay, they'll turn against you. It's not like most mortals spend enough time with gods to pick up their whole personalities.

Then, if the gods are always the same in my fics, why there are two camps? I'll need you to hold my hands when I tell you this: the gods will be gods tag doesn't exist for nothing. They'll do things just because they can.

Demigods are wild cards. There's only so much control you can have over them. Having a two sets of demigods that historically hate each other is kinda useful. "Oh, they're fighting and praying for us? Kinda annoying, so many voices in my head. Time to separate them again. Now with about half the population from before. Oh, these things happen. Time to set them apart until it's needed again."

Also, this removes the "we're roman/greek demigods" from the equation. Some are greek demigods because they were found by a satyr. Some are roman demigods because they ended up with in the Wolf House somehow. Nobody is Greek or Roman (my brothers and sisters, most of you were born in 20th century USA), but it's fundamental that these identities exist just so they can hate each other. Especially for the Romans, as their identity as Roman is fundamental so they can keep sending their kids and grandkids to a military colony.

When Thalia says that her father came back "different", it's totally dismissive because: one, she was a child, and two, a child who barely knew her father at all to pick up his personality and set in stone "he was different". This makes Jason story even more tragic, as his fate was decided entirely by the gods. He was not born Roman, he was made one because it was beneficial to Hera.

Instead of making them have multiple personalities based off aspects, I prefer to keep them unified because it feels more consistent when I'm writing, but also keep them accountable. The whole "oh, I didn't know, it wasn't me" don't stick out to me. They have a personality, the stories as we know were written by mortals that had their own interpretation, some are more accurate than others. It's not that deep.

Of course, some mortals were particularly creative and their versions became really famous. This don't change what really happened or the gods personality. Using Medusa as an example, I always follow the myth in which she was born a gorgon, the fact that there's a version she was a priestess of Minerva won't change the fact that she was born a monster (and that Poseidon liked her that way).

Finally, I also prefer keeping them with one single aspect because I don't want them removed from the narrative. In the Trojan War (the Trojans also had their "own" versions of the gods, btw) they picked their side, no headache made them absent. They had kids in both sides, so? For me, having them actually picking sides is simply more interesting.

That's it.

I said it was long.

[pienpup]

hey so like -- im noticing something here that i feel like we need to bring up and discuss.

jirai kei is a subculture commonly associated with sex workers, there are a lot of sex workers that are jirai, and a lot of them are minors.

while i am not defending the actions of creeps on here, or creeps in real life, something i need a lot of people on here to understand is just that. there will be people trying to buy sex, buy sexual interactions, buy nudes, etc. on here. even if you're a minor.

underage sex work is inseparable from jirai kei as a culture. i am a survivor of it myself, and thats part of why i felt drawn here.

when you post on platforms like jiraiblr, weirdos finding you is a risk that you take.

obviously this doesn't mean that weird or creepy behavior is okay, but it is inevitable and we need to recognize that. minors especially need to keep themselves safe. don't talk to random people. turn off your comments or even your reblogs if you must. block accordingly.

and, unfortunately, if you cannot handle these interactions or if they are triggering for you, you probably shouldn't be active in these public spaces.

i know that isnt what people want to hear, but it is real life. the culture around sex work will never be separated from jirai kei, so it is your responsibility to be mindful of it and stay safe.

there will always be people lurking on here looking to have sexual interactions with landmines. always. be aware and be safe.

[pikapitou]

wip day of the week

@effervescentwolf tagged me. some wednesday. to post a wip! thank you wolf... I don't know if I'll get around to finishing this presumed deaddie thing bc it's weird to write an arc while the show is. co-currently writing that arc at the same time as you. but i wanna share the opening scene :) idk who's writing these days... @tallsinspace if u wanna share anything pls feel free. anyway without further ado.

Three days without contact is not that long. Buck tries to convince himself of that fact, but he had also tried to convince himself that two days wasn't that long; twenty-four hours; twelve. He checks his phone again. Eddie still hasn't read his last message, or the one before that, or the ten before that. His leg is bouncing so hard that Hen and Chim's solitaire game jitters on the table, Kings mixing with the Queens.

Hen sighs. "Buck," she says, and waits for him to glance up at her, "if something was going on, I'm sure someone would—"

He's shaking his head before she finishes. "I'm—" his voice rasps worse than he expected, and he swallows with a click. "I'm not his emergency contact anymore. When he started at his station, he—yeah."

Eddie had sounded so apologetic about it, even though it was probably stupid for Buck's name to be there for as long as it was after he moved. It's not like Buck can do anything to help Eddie from here.

And the other thing? Buck had thought, and didn't ask, and kept thinking about, and not asking.

There's a pause, and he just knows they're exchanging one of those sad, little looks everyone keeps giving each other whenever they think he's acting especially pathetic. He's glad he didn't see it; if he did he might scream.

"You could text his mom?" Chim offers, then very quickly adds in a way that means Hen just raised an eyebrow at him, "Not that I think anything's wrong."

Buck turns his phone over and over and over in his hands. He doesn't have her number. He'd asked for it, before Eddie left, and Eddie had gotten quiet in that bad way, told him nothing was going to happen, which he knew as a first responder was never a fact, so that just meant he didn't want Buck to have it. Buck hadn't pushed, because—he didn't know why. Because if that was what Eddie needed to do, then Buck was going to let him do it.

He could text Chris, but if he texted Chris is your dad okay? and Eddie was okay, just busy, or ignoring him, or lost his phone in the El Paso desert, then it would be—it would be a whole thing, and Eddie was handling it. Alone. Because Eddie handled everything alone.

His phone buzzes in his hands—startling him so bad that he drops it, clattering onto the table at full volume and full vibration and mixing the solitaire game beyond salvation.

"See," Hen says, poorly masking her own relief.

Buck fumbles for his phone and—stares. Then he answers at the same time that he untangles himself from the chair and heads for the railing of the station loft for the illusion of being out of earshot. "Chris," he says, almost all air, "hey—"

"Do you just"—there's a vitriol in Chris's voice that would have made Buck stumble if he were walking—"not care or something?"

Reflexively, Buck looks over his shoulder at the table; Hen and Chim not bothering to hide that they're watching. They make eye contact, and maybe any other time it would be comforting, but right now there's only one other person in the world he wishes was here for this conversation.

"I always care, Chris," Buck says, keeping his voice calm and careful as he starts down the stairs, thinking in the back of his mind about the bunkroom or maybe outside; if the alarm goes he'll have to be the man behind, no other option. "I care like crazy, but could you tell me what's wrong?"

On the other end Chris sucks in this sharp breath that has Buck bracing for another drop of acid—but nothing comes. All he hears is Chris's ragged breathing, each hitch making Buck's heart lurch in his chest.

"Chris?" he asks. "Hey, c'mon, can you talk to me?"

"Did," Chris starts, and the anger has drained so completely from his voice that he just sounds unbearably small, "did abuela not tell you?"

Buck didn't make it to the bunkroom. He didn't make it outside. He's stuck, exposed, in the middle of the firehouse as the Earth slides off its axis into the death spiral of a blackhole.

"Tell me what?" he asks.