#I don't know if I'll be able to finish this thing - and even if I do I might not feel confident enough to post it -

[ms-demeanor]

Hi, this is maybe a pointless question where the answer is just "that's how life works," but how do you have energy for all the things you do? You seem to be constantly juggling 50 different projects and juggling them well. You create so many community resources, do deep scientific dives on your own time, excel at work, plus maintain social and familial relationships. I was able to maintain good work performance, a hobby, and social life for maybe six months last year before I burned out

The thing is I'm juggling it badly, it's just that you see the curated version here on tumblr! I've got probably five times as many stalled and unfinished resources/projects as I have completed ones, I am in a constant state of numbness/anxiety at work (since the new company bought us I'm really, really overworked and have been putting in 10-12 hour days pretty regularly - it's why my posting and writing here has dropped off and my fiction writing is basically not happening), and I'm actually a pretty shit friend because it's difficult for me to make time to communicate with people and leave the house.

My two tricks to make it seem like I've got it together are:

Just do a lot of shit. Some of it will get finished even if you end up with a ton of abandoned projects and if you do this at a high enough volume you can still get a lot done

Join some kind of club or regular hangout event; once a month I go hang out with the same group of people i've been hanging out with for twenty years and sometimes we'll plan things outside of that group and that's most of my social life.

I am also exhausted at all times but I've got the shark version of ADHD where I feel like if I'm not doing something I'll die.

I am probably deeply in danger of burning out but I've had the same "maybe if I get hit by a car I could take a couple weeks off of school without it destroying my life" feeling since i was 10 so it's hard for me to gauge if there's a collapse of any kind coming.

Have you ever tried to get yourself to sprint by falling forward and just putting your feet in front of yourself? It's like that, but I've managed to keep my feet under me so far. I'd say "if I had to deal with any obstacles it would make me fall flat on my face" but I'm actually more productive in catastrophes so. Who knows!

Mental illness. I think the answer is mental illness. I am not a healthy example to follow and I don't want people to think that the way that I act is A) Normal B) Healthy C) Effortless D) Sustainable.

I am just obsessive and weird and I don't sleep very much and I don't leave the house very frequently. I think things were better before the pandemic, when I was doing things with the band and could go to shows because Large Bastard wasn't immune compromised, but a lot has changed in the last five years.

[stars4noah]

HALLEY'S COMET- six.

{WARNINGS}: swearing, mention of a bar

w.c- 2,038

a.n- i'm gonna be so honest, chapter five was originally going to be the end of this series but i was driving and i had a crazy idea. enjoy more chapters because i don't think this story will be ending any time soon.

{TAGLIST}: @lacy1986 @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @chey-h @rumoured-whispers @oobleoob @dontwantthemoney @n0n3xsisting

"i'll love you forever." he said softly.

"and always?" i asked

he laughed softly, nuzzling his face in my hair.

"and always, my love."

"[y/n]. dude, come on. wake up." nicholas' voice broke through my hard slumber, jolting me awake. i furrowed my brows, sitting up slowly and looking around. i was on the tour bus. but why? i had just been on the couch with noah..

i ran a hand over my face, trying to gather my thoughts. we just finished a show. noah and i got into another argument. but this argument was different from the one in my dream. and then i left. no.. that part was a dream. i fell asleep.

it was all fake.

the music, the new album, the sex and the kisses and the 'i love you's. it was all fake. as much as i hated him, i felt a strange sense of disappointment down in my gut. it hit me like a train. this perfect life had been built up in my mind in the course of just a couple hours. was that really what i wanted? who was i kidding, of course it was. it was all i'd ever wanted in life. to be in love. to be happy. to be able to live out my dreams freely.

even though i definitely wasn't interested in the music industry.

"what, is she still sleeping?" i heard noah's voice getting closer, and i rolled my eyes as i jumped out of my bunk. "no, asshole. i'm awake."

"oh, she lives!" he said. "what were you even dreaming about? you've been tossing and turning and talking for the past 30 minutes." he said, his arms crossed.

"fuck off, noah." i grumbled, searching for some clothes for the show tonight.

"not until you learn how to do your job right."

i rolled my eyes, retreating to the bathroom to go and get ready.

"i swear, it's like he lives to piss me off. doesn't he have anything better to do? like, i dunno, hook up with girls? make music? write lyrics? instead of fucking with me. it's annoying." i rambled to nicholas as i set up my camera, him standing beside me.

and then he suggested the most absurd thing ever.

"i dunno, [y/n], maybe he likes you."

i choked on nothing, my eyes widening. "are you insane? him? like me? never in a million years would that happen."

nicholas laughed softly. "i mean, the way he talks about you when you're not around says otherwise. it's always [y/n] this, [y/n] that. don't you see the way he stares at you when you're not looking? or how he put extra effort in when he knows you're gonna be closer to the stage?"

i stayed quiet. he kind of had a point. i never heard him speak about me or felt his stares, but i could tell that he always dressed nicer or sang better when i was closer.

maybe..

no. hell no. just because i had that stupid dream doesn't mean a thing. i hate him, he hates me. and that's final.

"you're delusional." i said.

"you're in denial." he retorted, walking off to go get ready for the show.

as i continued to set up, i felt a pair of eyes on me. i looked up briefly, noticing noah looking at me before he quickly looked away, going to talk with some girl.

why was i jealous? it's not like we were together. not like i liked him. not like i imagined a future with him every time my insomnia kept me awake at night.

whatever. it didn't matter.

NOAH'S POV.

i finished up my conversation with some random girl whose name i couldn't even remember. i didn't know why, but some part of me just yearned to make [y/n] jealous. to make her wish i was giving her all of my attention instead of giving it to others. i needed her to know how i felt. how i looked at her, how i yearned for her.

what am i saying? i don't like her. at all. she's cocky and stuck up and beautiful and funny and-

fuck.

i watched as she walked around the arena, humming to herself as she adjusted the settings on her camera, not paying a lick of attention to where she was going. a couple more steps and she would-

CRASH!

"ow! fuck!"

i scoffed, walking over to where she was sat on the ground, rubbing the back of her head.

"you good there, princess? looks like you fell." i smirked.

she rolled her eyes, pulling herself up to her feet. "i'm fine."

"you sure? you took quite the fall there." i said.

she smirked. "aww, are you showing actual human empathy for once?"

i scoffed. "keep dreaming. i can't afford to lose my photographer right now. do your job." i said, walking away.

the lights dimmed as we took the stage, the crowd's energy palpable. i stepped up to the microphone, my intense gaze sweeping over the audience. among the sea of faces, my eyes locked with hers, an unfamiliar spark igniting between the two of us.

"the sutures in my head keep getting ripped out. these open wounds are the thoughts i can't stop thinking about. digging for purpose, feelings resurface. and involuntarily my system gets nervous."

there was a crowd of people in the arena. our first sold out show ever. we just released our album Finding God Before God Finds Me a couple months ago, and for our first sold out show of the tour, i decided to add a couple songs from our very first album.

"tell me tonight that you'll be by yourself. cause something bad will happen if you are with someone else. i'm just all fucked up, and i really need your help. i really need your help."

i looked at [y/n] in the front row, snapping pictures. when she was so close to the stage, i always felt like i performed better. seeing her smile at nicholas, hearing her sing along to our songs. it gave me motivation. i closed my eyes.

"there's a lotta hollow souls out there all alone, and they're waiting for you to invite 'em back into my home. they touched and they took what was rightfully mine. now i'm the devil, and their souls just went up in price."

images of her face filled my mind as i sang. her smile, her scowl, her tears and her laughter. every part of her was gorgeous. every part of her made me fall in love deeper and deeper every day. why couldn't i admit these feelings?

"set me free, i think i'm giving up. don't wait for me, i think i've had enough. set me free, i think i'm giving up. don't wait for me, i've had enough, enough now"

right. i had bailey. my girlfriend. i wondered what she was doing right now. maybe sleeping or shopping or watching tv in our bed at home. even though i had her, part of me felt off. it didn't feel like she really loved me. everyone always tried to convince me to break up with her. but she's my girl. the love of my life, the woman i wanted to marry one day. right?

as we got back onto the bus, i came to a realization.

one, i wasn't happy with bailey. she was toxic, manipulative, and i was pretty sure she was cheating on me.

two, i was utterly, hopelessly in love with [y/n].

i laid on my bunk, wide awake with my thoughts swarming in my mind. i was in love with her. i was in love with another woman. what the hell was wrong with me?

"there's a thousand voices in my head. i just hope it doesn't take a rope around my neck to put them all to rest." i hummed to myself, scrolling on my phone.

"noah?" [y/n]'s voice spoke from her bunk, her head peeking out of the curtain. "i thought you went for drinks with the others."

"nope." i said. "i'm not in the mood."

she raised an eyebrow. "that's weird. why?"

i shrugged. "i'm thinking."

"about?"

"none of your business."

she rolled her eyes, mumbling something under her breath before retreating back to her bunk.

it was quiet for another moment before i spoke.

"hey, [y/n]?" i said quietly, not wanting to disturb her in case she had fallen asleep.

"what?"

i bit my lip. "what do i do if i'm in love with someone.. but i'm in a relationship?"

she peeked her head out again, raising an eyebrow. "break up with the girl, duh. don't lead her on if you're not interested anymore. that's a dick move." she said. "wait, don't tell me you're breaking up with bailey?"

i shrugged again. "i dunno yet."

"jesus, finally." she said, and i frowned. "first of all, don't say that. second, i said i don't know yet. i'm thinking."

she sighed. "noah, you know she's a shit person. she literally abuses you. she's a toxic, manipulative asshole. and if you're in love with another woman who you know can give you the love that you deserve, shoot your shot. don't sit there and suffer just because you don't want to hurt someone's feelings."

i wasn't sure why, but a small bit of rage filled my body at the way she spoke about bailey. "don't talk about her like that. that's not true. she's just doing what she knows is best for me." i said, and she scoffed.

"whatever you say."

"you're just jealous." i crossed my arms.

she raised her eyebrows. "of what? cause its definitely not her behaviour. or literally any aspect of her personality or life."

i laid back down, ignoring her for the rest of the ride. i knew she was right, but i hated to admit it. i loved bailey. she was all that i had.

when we first got together, everything was great. i swore that i would marry her one day. and then she started going out more and staying out later and sometimes i didn't feel like i could trust her. but i let it slide because bringing it up would just lead to arguments. i didn't want arguments.

but as her behaviour continued and i saw my friends in happy, loving relationships, i realized it wasn't normal. being treated like this wasn't normal, and it wasn't what i wanted. i wanted to be happy. feel loved.

i wanted to be loved by [y/n].

with a sigh and a slightly heavy heart, i texted bailey a long message.

'i want to start this off by saying i know what you did. i know what you've been doing behind my back for longer than i'd like to admit. i loved you bailey, i really did. but we can't be together anymore. i want things that you can't provide me. i know you've been cheating on me, and i let it go because we all make mistakes. but this is more than a mistake. please don't try to fight this, just accept it. you would rather sleep with multiple other men than be with me, and that's okay. i can't be what you need, and you can't be what i need. we weren't made for each other. this is goodbye.'

with tears in my eyes, i put on my headphones and put my phone on silent, blasting some music as i washed away these feelings that i didn't want to hit me at this moment. i hated being vulnerable. i'd cry it out when i was alone.

i sat in my bunk for the rest of the night, trying to fall asleep but i couldn't. instead, i drew in my notebook and wrote down the occasional lyric that popped into my mind.

'i'll flip it with you and me inside.'

'heaven know's i ain't gettin' over you.'

'thought you were somebody else.'

'no way to right these wrongs, either way i'm feeling, it might just cost something in the millions. i know that i can't resist.'

fuck. this was going to be good.

[kyokutsu-sama]

Headcanons| They having a s/o who is afraid of spiders

Characthers: Tengen, Sanemi, Kyojuro, Hotaru

A/n: I'm writing this one, inspired by the situation I posted here the other day about that huge spider that appeared in my bedroom and I wanted to make a scenario where they kill a spider because the reader is afraid of spiders😅

I'm actually not terrified of spiders (at least when they're small) because when they're big I get all shivering🫣

🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️🔸️

Tengen :

You and Suma were in the bedroom talking and folding some clothes to put them away in the drawers of the dresser. "Will Lord Tengen come for dinner today? I mean, he was supposed to go on a mission today." Suma said "I have no idea," you replied, picking up the folded clothes. "Maybe he won't, he hasn't come back yet, so maybe he'll be too late."You went to the chest of drawers and opened the drawer, coming across a huge spider that made you scream loudly "What's wrong?" Suma approached and when she saw the spider she immediately jumped onto the bed in fear, also screaming Tengen opened the front door and heard your screams coming from the bedroom, which made him panic. He thought some demon had come in since it was already night. He ran towards the bedroom and when he opened the door he saw you hugging Suma with one arm and using the other to hold on to your shoe as if you were threatening to kill the spider if it got even an inch closer to the two of you. He scratched the back of his neck for a moment, trying to figure out what was going on there. "Wow, what the hell is happening here? I heard you two screaming just now." He said, approaching the bed "Tengen... over there." You pointed with your shoe to the chest of drawers "What's wrong?" He looked back without understanding "There's a huge spider inside the drawer." You explained "Oh, and what do you want me to do? Protect you and Suma from the spider or the spider from the two of you?" He laughed and you threw your shoe at him "Don't be an idiot and finish that thing off now." "Okay, I'll do it." He said, approaching the open drawer and saw the spider. He used his own hand to kill it effortlessly, both you and Suma made faces of disgust. "It's dead." He said, turning to you, who sighed in relief "Thanks for killing it." You said "Thank you, Lord Tengen, it really scared us." Suma smiled at him, and he smiled back "Yeah, I know..." He approached you and stopped at the edge of the bed. "But now you can rest easy. Here, the corpse." He said, throwing the dead spider at you two, and you jumped out of bed, running away, and he laughed out loud "Tengen, you son of a bitch! I'll kill you!" You yelled

Sanemi:

Sanemi was spending the night with you today since he hadn't been called for any missions. You were happy to be able to spend more time with your husband since nights are usually very busy for him as Hashira. While he was in the kitchen finishing up dinner (yes because he definitely cooks well and no one can change my mind) you were in the bathroom taking a shower. After finishing, you wrapped yourself in the towel, drying yourself and when you went to get the dress that was on top of the cabinet, you saw a big spider that made you scream and run to the corner of the bathroom trembling. "SANEMI!!" You shouted for your husband who was scared from the kitchen, hearing your screams He left the food aside and ran to the bathroom to see what was going on. As soon as he opened the door, he found you in the corner, scared and he didn't realize what was happening. "What was all that screaming about?" He asked as he approached you "Nemi, look to the side, on the cabinet." You said, your voice trembling and pointing to where the spider was He looked to the side and saw the motionless spider and couldn't help but laugh a little. "Seriously? You were screaming and cowering because of a simple spider?" He frowned and you nodded "Yes, and rightly so. Have you seen the size of that bitch?" You replied "So what?" "So what? Kill her!" You ordered and he rolled his eyes "Holy shit, Y/n!" He slapped the spider with his bare hand and crushed it like it was nothing. "Does it really cost you that much to kill a fucking spider?" He scolded you "Yes it does, because I'm scared and those things are disgusting"You said, coming out of the corner, adjusting the towel that was slipping, and he just shook his head. "Anyway, thanks for killing her." "Hurry up and get dressed, the food must be cold by now with all the time we wasted here because of a spider." He said, turning around walking toward the door "Was it really necessary to use so much brutality?" You scratched the back of your neck, seeing the spider completely crushed "Didn't you tell me to kill it? There it is, but if you feel so sorry for it, next time I'll ignore your screams." He said, slamming the bathroom door "He's scarier than spiders," you thought, smiling

Kyojuro:

You and your husband had taken the day off to train and improve breathing and combat techniques, since in a few days you would be called to go on a mission once again. Kyojuro was as fast as ever, sometimes it was hard for you to keep up with him, even though you were a Hashira like him. He had a lot of talent and you always admired him a lot for that. Not only you, but the other Hashiras as well. His attacks were coming from all directions, your arms were already wavering, tired of trying to block them all for hours. Your body was about to give in and he still seemed to be full of energy to continue. And then after some time you fell to the ground completely sweaty and exhausted, your breathing was uneven and your limbs numb. You had been training since early afternoon and the sun was already setting, it was long and painful but it was worth it. "Well well, my wife looks so tired. I didn't overdo it with the training, did I?" He asked, crouching down next to you "Enough for me to not move for the next few days. I could barely defend myself from all those attacks." You said and he chuckled "Nah, you did really well today. You're getting stronger and that made me proud." "Thanks." You smiled You were still lying on the floor when you felt an impression on your leg as if something was crawling up your leg and when you pulled the fabric up to see, you came across a huge spider which made you scream and shake your leg so it would come off. "KYO!! HELP ME!!" Fear took over you making you jump into his arms and put your arms around his neck, screaming "Y/N! What happened! Where did you get all that strength from now?" He frowned, trying to stay stable with you in his arms since you had thrown yourself at him very suddenly and you wouldn't stop shaking your leg. "If you don't stop moving we're both going to fall." "A huge spider is crawling up my leg." You explained "Calm down, just let me see that." He put you on the floor and bent down to check, but the spider had already fallen from your leg. "It's okay, little flame, it probably fell when you swung your leg. There's nothing here." He smiled at you "Are you sure?" You said, peeking everywhere, even inside your pants to check "Not at all." He nodded "What a fucking scare!" You said, sighing in relief "Y/n, since when are you afraid of spiders? You've never told me about it." He crossed his arms with a teasing smile "I not afraid of spiders, but I mean... One that big, I do." You said, scratching your nape, and he smiled. "Are you laughing at me?" "Me? I would never make fun of my dear wife." He pulled you closer and kissed your forehead. "But from now on, I'm going to keep a spider like that one with me for when you start to run out of energy during training." He teased and you roll your eyes, slapping his chest "You're an idiot." You giggled

Hotaru :

Your husband was working long hours, forging and perfecting a new sword. Every minute of his work was precious, he loved what he did for living and if anyone dared to ruin his work, he would kill the person responsible. However, there were still little things that kept him calm and peaceful. The sound of the bells as the wind blew through them, the delicious and sweet dangos. Ah yes, his weakness... You then decided to make the recipe to take to him, who must have been hungry by now. When you arrived at the forge, he was there and you carefully entered to surprise him. He was so focused that he barely felt your presence even next to him. "Hi, dear! How are you?" You greeted him with a smile, but he continued sharpening the blade. "I brought food, you're hungry, right? Standing there for hours, working must not be an easy task." You approached him, caressing his back Seeing that he wasn't responding, you decided to run your hands along his sides and lightly tickle him, which immediately made him squirm a little and lose focus. "Y/n, I'm working..." He said, but you decided to intensify the touch, making him squirm even more "And you're ignoring me while I talk to you, and I'm not liking it one bit." "It's almost finished, okay?" He said, holding your hands. "Just a few more touches and--" "And you're going to take a break and come eat with me, got that?" You ordered and he just exhaled, rolling his eyes at you, giving in to your commands The swordsmith's eyes were now focused not on a blade but on the dango in his hands. His bright eyes looked like a stars, which you found cute. "This tastes so good." He said as he ate "Did you like it? I made it for you." "You did well then." "Thank you." You smiled You looked at the bench where he was forging a sword a moment ago and saw the shiny, sharp blade that could cut just by looking at it. You approached to see it up close. You were one of the few people he allowed to get close to his works of art and even hold them. A privilege. As soon as you picked up the sword, a spider that was on the handle ended up jumping onto your hand, making you drop the sword and start screaming, scaring Haganezuka who was eating so calmly. "What happened? Did you go crazy out of nowhere?" He asked, coming closer and you jumped into his lap, grabbing his large, strong figure. "Hotaru!! A huge spider appeared just now when I went to grab my sword." You said, distressed by the situation "And is all this fuss necessary?" He grumbled "Of course it is! It was huge and scary!" He looked at the counter and then at the floor where he saw the fearsome spider and stepped on it a few times, solving the problem. "There!! It's dead now. You can put your feet back on the ground." He said, putting you down again You sighed in relief at seeing the dead spider, but you couldn't help but grimace in disgust. "Yikes!! That's so horrible." "What was really horrible was that you dropped my sword that had just been sharpened." He said, picking up the sword from the floor and shaking his head, looking at it "I was scared. Did you see the size of that thing?" "So what? My sword is more important than the size of the spider." "Don't tell me you were going to let that thing sting me just because of a sword?"You crossed your arms "No, I mean... I would kill it, of course... But then I would kill you for dropping the sword so carelessly." He said and you narrowed your eyes at him "I should be the one killing you for being such an idiot and obsessed with swords." You said through clenched teeth

[beef-brisket]

Adam laughed as he exited the party, waving to a few of the guests. In all of his years in Heaven, he never thought he'd enjoy parties. That's not saying Heaven didn't have any, but they were very different fmto the ones in Hell. Alcohol definitely wasn't allowed. But Adam won't lie. He enjoyed being drunk, it was unlike anything he's ever experienced.

He could do without the hangover, though.

Tonight, he was able to get out of his head and stop worrying about Steve and Lucifer. And his meeting with Asmodeus tomorrow where he finds out where on Earth he'll be going. That's if he even gets there. He wasn't too sure if Ozzie's plan for putting a different "mispelled" name would work. Lucifer's an idiot, but he's not THAT stupid.

Adam sighed and wrapped his arms around himself as he walked back to Verosika's house. He could feel that anxiety prickling at his skin. That worry flooding back. After everything he did to get rid of it, it comes back like Adam didn't just spend nearly six hours getting wasted.

Adam: Fuck me...

Speaking of, he didn't even get laid. He was still getting used to this "needing sex for energy" thing, but he just doesn't feel like it.

Adam's been away from Steve for nearly a week, and he could feel the need pulsing through him. He could ignore it for now, but hopefully, he would be on earth before it becomes unbearable.

Sighing, Adam looks around, watching other hellborn do their thing. Stumbling out of bars, singing loudly with their friends as they walk down the street, lining up outside food vendors.

He hoped that one day, his life would be normal like that. A day where he'd have no worries, he wouldn't be scared to go out, afraid of who he would run into.

Groaning as his stomach grumbled, he decided a good meal should help with the anxiety. At least, he hoped.

-

Adam: WHAT?!

Ozzie sighed as he placed the paper back on his desk: I'm sorry, Adam-.

Adam: Declined?! He declined it?! He- I thought you said he's never declined an application before!

Ozzie pinched the brow of his nose. He fucking talked to Lucifer about this, he was only going to drive Adam away. And even the Sin could tell he was struggling down here.

Ozzie: He doesn't. He hasn't... stupid bastard... he's an idiot, babe. Look. You don't want to be here, I understand-.

Adam covered his face with his hands: It's not that- I just... my manager... I was hoping to get away from him, too. And now... I'm fucking stuck here.

Ozzie: Your manager?

Adam nodded: He's been... close to finding me. I can't hide at Ver's place forever. She has her own shit to do. I'll have to go back to-.

Shaking, Adam couldn't finish his sentence before he started crying. He was terrified to go back to Steve to see him again.

Ozzie: Oh, darling.

Adam cried more when he felt himself be softly embraced and pulled into a warm hug. He just wanted this to be over. He was trapped in Heaven, and just when he was finding himself in Hell, Steve took advantage of his new freedom. And now, Charlie, Vaggie, and Nifty just HAD to tell Lucifer about him. So now, he has two crazy assholes on his ass.

Ozzie: I'm so sorry, Adam. Really. I am.

Adam: I-It's o-ok-okay-.

Ozzie: No, it's not. You're the first man. The commander of the exorcists. Nothing should scare you. But you're petrified. You're in my ring, Adam. You're one of my people now, and you know what? I like you. Really. You're an interesting person, and the Lust Ring could really benefit from having you here.

Adam slowly looked up at Ozzie: R-Really?

Ozzie smiled: Really. I want to help you, Adam. There's five other rings in Hell. All of them filled with the horniest fuckers ever born. I'll help you set yourself up somewhere else. Or, if you like Lust, I'll employ you.

Adam: Employ me? What does that mean?

Ozzie: You can still do your shows, or you could sing at my bars. And get all of the sex your heart desires. And be paid, of course~.

Adam: A... bar singer...?

Ozzie: I know it may seem like a downgrade, but their all very fancy. Trust me. I only ask one thing in return.

Adam: What's that?

Ozzie smiled: Of you're comfortable, I'd love for you to model some sex toys for me. All for advertisement, of course. You're a very attractive man, Adam. And you need to be seen. But of course, all of this is only with your consent, even if you say no, I'd love for you to sing and perform at my establishments.

Adam thought about for a moment: ...Okay. I'll do it.

He smiled up at Ozzie, who smiled back: I'll write your contract up then. I'll have my receptionist bring you in when it's ready.

Leaving the room, Adam felt a wash was relief. He was finally doing something that he was actually excited about. He's never performed in front of a small crowd before, but he was willing to do anything to make a name for himself, his way.

That didn't mean he didn't want to kill Lucifer for declining his application, but he was ready for this next step. He didn't need Steve, and he sure as hell didn't need Lucifer.

Succubus au

@beef-brisket

@fanofstuff01

(This au was originally on @things-aren't-what-they-seem66blog and was originally thought of by an anonymous ask)

The roaring of the crowd and the playing of his guitar deafened his ears but the incubus didn't care. He loved the way they cheered his name while he shredded on his axe. With one final strum, his song was done. He raised his arms and gave the horns, to which his fans reciprocated, and bid them all goodnight. He walked away his hands still raised until he was out of sight from them. Adam sighed heavily and wiped the sweat with his forearm as he made his way to his dressing room.

Once there he flopped onto the couch and groaned. Though Adam loved being a rockstar and having adoring fans, he wouldn't lie to himself, each performance, especially concerts, can be quite draining since he always had to prepare with mic checks and making sure he sounded right. Steve, his producer/manager/on-and-off-again fling, always assured him that these were mandatory. Just one of those sacrifices that come with being a star. Still, Adam felt a little like shit and he needed a drink, a hard one. Unfortunately, his evening wasn't quite over yet as knocking was heard from the other side of the door then a voice called out.

Assistant: Excuse me? Commander? I'm sorry for bothering you but I brought the VIP guests here with me.

Adam sighed completely forgetting about that. Almost all VIPs get access to meet him after every show. Though he loved his fans coming to him and saying how much they loved him, maybe even getting some head from the older crowd, tonight, he didn't want to. However, he knew that he didn't have much of a choice. Unless he wanted Steve up his ass, and not in a good way. Letting out a long groan he sat up, rubbed his eyes, and yelled out to her.

Adam: Bring them in.

He closed his eyes and sighed once again as he heard the door open and feet shuffle in. He prepared himself for the immediate responses of squealing and clamoring over to shake his hand. However, he was not prepared for a familiar voice to call out his name.

Charlie: A, Adam?

He opened his eyes and standing in front of him were Charlie, Vaggie, and a one-eyed sinner.

[bunbun-mochi]

Solitary in Space

Xavier x MC (angst)

Warning: Just Xavier being lonely. I'm going to read his fluff stories after I finish this one.

Word Count: ~500, no proofreading

Preview: Xavier spent time on the spaceship alone trying to save MC by going into the past; he put down documents of his travels while missing MC.

Note: Only Xavier did not hold MC's hand in his trailer, and people speculated that he never confessed his feelings to MC and I'm crying right now.

Tagging: @madam8

I love you.

He wanted to say before he departs, but those words just stuck in his throat. He wanted to hug her one more time, to feel her heat under his fingertips, to feel her love for him.

He watched through the spaceship window as the ship did a countdown to set into space.

Ten.

She smiled at him while she waved good-bye. Her beautiful smile has a hint of sadness. He didn't know if he returned the smile or if he had been frowning the entire time.

Nine.

"I'll wait for you." He saw the way she mouthed those words.

"I'll come back for you." He mouthed back, knowing that he was gambling on this promise.

Eight.

Make sure you take care of yourself. Make sure you sleep well, eat well, and are healthy. He wanted to say. Part of him wanted to slap himself for not saying those words to her.

Seven.

I should've said "I love you" to her. He thought. I should've given her the love she deserved.

Six.

If his father is here, he will lecture him so badly of the length he went for an unnecessary feeling of love. But he didn't care. He'd sacrifice anything for her. Anything to cure her illness, anything to make her happy.

Five.

Even if it's his own life.

Four.

A single teardrop rolled down her cheek. Xavier felt his heart slowly break into pieces, shattering like glass. Please don't cry. I'll come back for you.

Three.

He doesn't know whether he said those words to comfort himself or her, because he knows that promise carried a lot of weight.

Two.

Because he knows there is a chance he'll never come back. That he'll be lost in time or space. Or perhaps both if the universe is so unforgiving.

One.

The spaceship accended into the space. He watched as his love slowly turned into a speck, the distant stars in the sky.

Every night, Xavier would take a deep breath before turning on the device, recounting his time in the spaceship and his findings before shutting down the device. He had repeated the same thing over and over again.

He thought that perhaps when he wasn't able to return home, maybe this device could reach his beloved? He closed his eyes and sighed deeply. As each day passed, it became harder and harder for him. Every night he would dream of her. Dreamt that she holds him in his arms; dreamt that she appeared in the spaceship; dreamt that they eloped to another planet without the care of the world. And every day he would wake up to reality. The reality where she isn't here with him.

He pulled a small device from his front pocket; turning it on showed images of her. He smiled briefly before tucking the device back into his pocket.

He walked down the dark corridors, looking at the stars twinkle in the dark abyss of the universe. "I miss you." He whispered toward the darkness. Only the silence of the vacuum and the endless abyss of the cosmos can hear his silent longing for his beloved.

Lavender butterfly template from @uzma-qureshi

[danikatze]

[ID in alt text]

Another wip! It's kind of almost done :)

[amidnightqueery]

I don't hate my job or anything, but man, being a float educator is so fucking thankless

[yuucandoit]

saw someone before say that it's probably purposeful on Rook's part to speak French or whatever language he's using (or for Sam to have lanterns with kanji on it), so since he's /intending/ it to stand out rather than just communicate with whatever language it translates. I do think the idea that the wizard might have just hated France a bit funny, I admit, HOWEVER

... since the novel introduces the idea of a translation spell being in place when Yuu speaks Japanese and then the game introduces the concept of Raverne having learned Common / that presumably being the universal language for easy communication

Idk. I think the simple answer is the novel and game are not one to one on everything more than likely. And in interest of simplicity they said like.. no homicipher here we don't need to worry about addressing how the character can understand people (until there is discrepancy on how language works in which case the fandom can have fun ? i guess ? since we get into those details)

Given that Yuu can understand everyone speaking Common ?

(I'll assume given the game brought it up rather than a translation spell that is what Vil gets on Epel for not speaking to standard)

when they visit areas outside NRC, I think that it's potentially a translation spell on them (edit: I needed to finish this thought bc it got too rambly and never connected, but I'm not 100% on 'this spell was cast on Yuu when they came to Twisted Wonderland' but at the same time how are Yuu understanding everyone outside NRC ? besides narrative convenience)

-- unless their brain managed to acquire it through some sort of combination of actually hearing it/then being magically/automatically translated into Common when attempting to speak/ muscle memory of their mouth forming the language

(so like.. not something we have a word for I think because it's impossible to deliver a full language to someone's brain that they've never learned before aaand idk if language acquisition is the right term but some sort of perceptual adaptation thing from being surrounded by / actually communicating in a language at a presumably native level is what I'm thinking of.)

However, unless like.. magic would speed up that process (and assuming even if it does Yuu is capable of benefiting from that) I don't see them having that kind of neural language acquisition by the time they're headed to the Dwarfs Mine unless it is also on Sage's Island somewhere ?

Maybe? I still gotta check out Camp Vargas soo... I feel like it would say on the wiki if they mentioned it was on Sage's Island still, though

So potentially a spell was cast on Yuu to be able to understand everyone in Twisted Wonderland and they've never questioned it (and the caster assumed it would not be questioned) because they assumed it was a school-wide thing that everyone was also dealing with ? Which I could kind of see in line with the way some other things are brought up in twst and never examined by the characters they concern

Like. I would think it is a question that would come up at some point, but also I could see Yuu wondering like 'well apparently Common exists bc that is something that we learned about in History or whatever so everyone here is probably speaking that and I guess there's also a translation spell on the school and that's why I can understand people and that spell is there along with Common because ? but also it must be following me because I could still understand Floyd and Jade in the Coral Sea !' but then get distracted by everyone bleeding/crying/throwing up ink and almost dying and it gets put on the back burner I guess

Also idk maybe in general and to tie the novel and game, it's a combination of Common being a language but the translation spell is centuries old and was in place before Common was invented (idk the Raverne timeline that well, but I know that he was mentioned to have learned Common by Lilia so that would be before Lilia was at NRC but NRC also existed at that point because he brought it up in his memory dream that he had received a letter to enroll SO. Maybe it was simpler to get everyone to speak using magic rather than collaborate or agree on a lingua franca at some points)

so they're just.. doubling up at NRC cause why not but if you wanna speak French then go ahead, little fancy lad

yuu is from an entire other reality and the universal translation spell lets them be understood but Rook Speaks French. and his French is still in French

[ageless-aislynn]

Nowwwwww, I facetiously mentioned at the bottom of this post about the Halo: Reach achievement:

To do that, you have to go under or close to par time on pretty much each level ON LEGENDARY.

I have beaten Reach on Legendary but it probably took me closer to 30 hours than 3 because I did my slow, methodical strategies to get through. I did the par time achievement by running past everything I could on Easy. Can I combine the two successfully?

I decided to give the first level "Winter Contingency" a try (after watching some Youtube vids on getting this achievement, of course 😉). Par time is 15 minutes.

That was my third try, the first was 16 and some minutes, the second got it to 15 and some and then that one got under the par by 32 seconds! I should note that this is considered one of the easiest levels to do on Legendary and the guide I watched by the ever-awesome Halo Completionist did it under 12 minutes and you're going to need every spare second you can scrap together to give you a buffer for some of the long, difficult levels. But still!

It's silly, I know, but I feel so proud of me! I'm an old lady (well, middle-aged, if I'm being generous 😜) playing Halo with shaky hands but I made under par time on Legendary! 🥳🥳🥳

PS - Tried it again and got 13:55!

[arttsuka]

So, please don't send me anymore asks right now, I don't think I'll be able to finish them 😢

I won't be home for the foreseeable future so I won't have most of my art supplies with me

Yes all these, I can't just take them all :(

Btw I won't be closing the ask box or anything

[tardis--dreams]

You know what? I give up on this paper once and for all. I'm not even ashamed anymore

[asterdeer]

spent 80% of my day making the pain-in-the-ass squares for my ace jon quilt and consequently my body is 80% pain now

[skrunksthatwunk]

household enemy to the yyh watchthrough number one is the olympics. it's taken us a week to get two episodes into the gamemaster fight

[wildberryjams]

Hello ♡ It's been a while!

It's been over a year I think? I haven't kept track tbqh

I'm not really back, because I want to be noncommittal as possible (since I have a tendency to disappear when my motivation to write does)

But this is me saying that I'm finally working on under the rose again! ♡

I'd all but abandoned it months ago, but yesterday I had a burst of energy and managed to write a couple hundred words. Tonight, the total is 1300. It's not much, but it's a start!

I don't talk about my personal life for many reasons, but this year has been one of the most difficult I've ever experienced. The last thing on my mind has been Will and Azul, as much as I wish they'd kept occupying every inch of it like they used to.

That spark is coming back, I think! ♡ (More in the tags since this is getting long)

[shirogane-oushirou]

meowdy... <3

[crimeronan]

i'm working on the next wwaitsoatl chapter, which as i've previously mentioned is by FAR my most involved story as far as, like, technical process goes. i finished the second draft of the chapter and went "god, wow, this is all shit, this all sucks so bad, i'm never gonna be able to make anything usable out of this" and then stepped away for a few hours and now i'm midway through the first editing pass and i just keep going "oh my god. oh my god. holy Shit this is gonna bang so fucking hard once i fix it all. oh this is gonna go so hard there's so much potential. fuck YES oh my GOD my HORRIBLE LITTLE BITCHES ARE BACK-"