#I don't have good ideas for further research
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girlscience · 9 months ago
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boy howdy, I am working myself into a full panic over this. if I get an hour of sleep tonight it will be a miracle.
#like this is an INTERVIEW. do you know how many job interviews I have had in my life????#compared to how many jobs I have had???????#I GOT REJECTED BY WALGREENS FOR CHRISTS SAKE#I just. this man is holding my entire plan for my future right now in his hands#if he doesn't want me. If he decides I wouldn't be good in his lab I don't know what I'll do#like yeah yeah life will keep going and the world will keep turning and stuff#but I am not joking I will be devastated. and then I will have to TELL people about it#and like I still have yet to hear back from the other school and none of the professors there have talked to me#so idk if I could do what I want to there either (they do have the classes I want so I'm assuming one of the professors does what I want)#and everyone keeps saying it'll be fine and I'll do good and anyone would want me in their lab#but I DONT THINK IM IMPRESSIVE. I compare myself to other scientists and eh. I don't measure up#like sure I have good bench skills and I can learn pretty much anything you set me to#but I don't know how to come up with research proposals#I don't know how to ask good questions about papers I read#I don't have good ideas for further research#like. I did library prep at work for 3 years and we recently hired someone who has more or less taken it over#and he actually understands and talks about the actual molecular processes in a way I never learned#idk I just feel like yeah I'm good at science. but I'm good because I'm good at following directions#I am not actually inovative or creative or increasing understanding#point is I am stressed and people keep telling me not to be but I don't believe them and I am scared that I have got myself too excited#and I am about to be let down very hard very fast#and I don't really have any safety nets in place if it doesn't work out
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asurrogateblog · 3 months ago
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as a media psychology researcher 85% of my job is figuring out the most horrifically academic way to say "you idiots wouldn't last a day on tumblr"
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tofixtheshadows · 6 months ago
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I've been thinking a lot lately about how Kabru deprives himself.
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Kabru as a character is intertwined with the idea that sometimes we have to sacrifice the needs of the few for the good of the many. He ultimately subverts this first by sabotaging the Canaries and then by letting Laios go, but in practice he's already been living a life of self-sacrifice.
Saving people, and learning the secrets of the dungeons to seal them, are what's important. Not his own comforts. Not his own desires. He forces them down until he doesn't know they're there, until one of them has to come spilling out during the confession in chapter 76.
Specifically, I think it's very significant, in a story about food and all that it entails, that Kabru is rarely shown eating. He's the deuteragonist of Dungeon Meshi, the cooking manga, but while meals are the anchoring points of Laios's journey, given loving focus, for Kabru, they're ... not.
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I'm sure he eats during dungeon expeditions, in the routine way that adventurers must when they sit down to camp. But on the surface, you get the idea that Kabru spends most of his time doing his self-assigned dungeon-related tasks: meeting with people, studying them, putting together that evidence board, researching the dungeon, god knows what else. Feeding himself is secondary.
He's introduced during a meal, eating at a restaurant, just to set up the contrast between his party and Laios's. And it's the last normal meal we see him eating until the communal ending feast (if you consider Falin's dragon parts normal).
First, we get this:
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Kabru's response here is such a non-answer, it strongly implies to me that he wasn't thinking about it until Rin brought it up. That he might not even be feeling the hunger signals that he logically knew he should.
They sit down to eat, but Kabru is never drawn reaching for food or eating it like the rest of his party. He only drinks.
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It's possible this means nothing, that we can just assume he's putting food in his mouth off-panel, but again, this entire manga is about food. Cooking it, eating it, appreciating it, taking pleasure in it, grounding yourself in the necessary routine of it and affirming your right to live by consuming it. It's given such a huge focus.
We don't see him eat again until the harpy egg.
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What a significant question for the protagonist to ask his foil in this story about eating! Aren't you hungry? Aren't you, Kabru?
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He was revived only minutes ago after a violent encounter. And then he chokes down food that causes him further harm by triggering him, all because he's so determined to stay in Laios's good graces.
In his flashback, we see Milsiril trying to spoon-feed young Kabru cake that we know he doesn't like. He doesn't want to eat: he wants to be training.
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Then with Mithrun, we see him eating the least-monstery monster food he can get his hands on, for the sake of survival- walking mushroom, barometz, an egg. The barometz is his first chance to make something like an a real meal, and he actually seems excited about it because he wants to replicate a lamb dish his mother used to make him!
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...but he doesn't get to enjoy it like he wanted to.
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Then, when all the Canaries are eating field rations ... Kabru still isn't shown eating. He's only shown giving food to Mithrun.
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And of course the next time he eats is the bavarois, which for his sake is at least plant based ... but he still has to use a coping mechanism to get through it.
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I don't think Kabru does this all on purpose. I think Kui does this all on purpose. Kabru's Post Traumatic Stress Disorder should be understood as informing his character just as much as Laios's autism informs his. It's another way that Kabru and Laios act as foils: where Laios takes pleasure in meals and approaches food with the excitement of discovery, Kabru's experiences with eating are tainted by his trauma. Laios indulges; Kabru denies himself. Laios is shown enjoying food, Kabru is shown struggling with it.
And I can very easily imagine a reason why Kabru might have a subconscious aversion towards eating.
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Meals are the privilege of the living.
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sturnioz · 2 months ago
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‘PRETTY & NERDY’ — MATTHEW STURNIOLO
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pairing. matthew sturniolo x fem!reader genre. smut, established relationship au, college au.
word count. 2.8k
❝i think my pretty girl enjoys the idea of someone seein' my hands on you like this.❞
content warnings. explicit content, fingering, clit stimulation, public sex (exhibitionism), light hair pulling, unprotected sex, creampie.
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"you know... when i asked if you wanted to work on this project together, i actually meant work." you say, your voice laced with mock seriousness as you glance up at your boyfriend, who sits across the table in the quiet library, a sly smirk dancing on his lips as he leans back in his seat, making himself comfortable.
as he stretches, his foot glides up your calf, the soft fabric of his sock brushing against your skin in a teasing manner — you nearly snort at the thought of him just wearing one shoe beneath the table, but the sensation of his gentle touches keeps you from laughing.
his fingers, adorned with rings that catch the dim light, twirls a pen nonchalantly, his body sinking further into his chair as he presses his foot more insistently between your thighs, sending a shiver down your spine.
"i know you like it," matt murmurs, bringing the tip of his pen to his glasses to push them up the bridge of his nose.
"maybe so," you quip, flipping through the scattered papers on the table and sliding them across the polished woof in his direction. "but i also like getting good grades.. be a good boy and fill out the bottom half while i find another resource book, yeah?"
a grin spreads across his face, and he prods his tongue against his cheek, his head bobbing in a short nod. his foot slips from between your thighs as he sits up comfortably in his seat, and you can't help but smile at his obedience.
you push yourself up from your own seat and make your way over to the nearby shelves, your eyes scanning the titles in search for the right book needed for your research. as you navigate the aisles, you take note of the various students scattered throughout the library.
some have their eyes glued to laptop screens, fingers rapidly typing away, while others are deeply engrossed in thick textbooks, headphones snugly covering their ears.
but in a quiet corner, you spot a couple nestled together, sharing hushed whispers and flirty giggles, their hands innocently wandering as they lean in closer.
they remind you of you and matt — though sometimes, you wouldn't exactly label your own wandering hands as innocent. there's been a few scenarios where you've been out in public, hands shoved down each others pants, or you down on your knees to blow him, or even him laying you down flat on top of a surface and devouring your pussy like a starved animal.
the thrill of being so close to getting caught excites you just as much as it excites him, and the thought alone sends a throb between your legs.
you avert your eyes away from the couple, a smirk creeping onto your lips as you notice them watching you, and their faces flush with embarrassment when they realise they've been caught — hurriedly gathering their belongings, head ducked low, hand in hand as they scurry away, leaving you amused.
"i know you like the feelin' of being watched, but i didn't realise you like being the watcher too..." matt's voice drifts into your ear, teasing and low. you're not taken aback by his sudden appearance, and you sink back into his chest as he presses firmly against your back, enveloping you in warmth. his breath, warm and inviting, dancing along your neck as he whispers, "somethin' you wanna tell me, sweetheart?"
"nothing that you don't already know," you tease back, returning your focus to the shelves in search of the book you need. as you sift through the titles, you feel matt's arms slowly slide around your waist, his palms pressing against your stomach, pulling you closer to him.
a smile tugs at the corner of your lips as his fingertips dip beneath the fabric of your shirt, offering a comforting touch that sends warmth spreading through you.
you ask, "did you finish your section of the paper?"
instead of a verbal answer, matt hums softly, his lips far too busy pressing gentle kisses along your neck. he nips playfully at the sensitive spots, causing your head to roll back against his shoulder, a deep exhale escaping your lips. his hands slip further under your shirt, fingers stroking the skin of your stomach.
the library faded into the background, making it harder for you to concentrate on anything else, and you can feel his grin against your neck, his glasses nudging lightly against your head as he chuckles at the reaction he easily caused.
"anyone can catch us here, you know," you whisper, your hand reaching around to rest on the back of his head, fingers slipping through his dark hair, nails scraping his scalp as you gently tug at the roots, which causes a quiet groan to rumble in his chest. "someone could look over, see your hands up my shirt — or maybe they'll walk over to find a book, and see you pressed against me like this. what would they think?"
"do you care what they would think?" matt whispers in your ear, and you shake your head, a small gasp leaving your lips as you feel his hand slide down to cup your pussy through your skirt, and you push back against him, ass rutting against his growing cock. "do you wanna know what i think? i think my pretty girl enjoys the idea of someone seein' my hands on you like this."
"i do.." you breathe out with a hum. "so, are you actually going to do something about it, or—"
"shh, sweetheart. patience, yeah?" he croons softly as he fists at your skirt, pulling the material up to your hips so he can dip his hands between your legs. "it won't feel good if we rush it, y'know."
your body fully relaxes into him, gripping his hair even tighter as his lips attach to your neck in gentle, affectionate kisses while his fingers stroke over your covered folds, your knees almost buckling when his finger draws circles over your clit.
your body feels hot — clothes sticking uncomfortably like second skin, and you're desperate to peel them off to finally let yourself breathe, but your free hand shoots out to grip the shelf in front of you when you feel matt drag your panties down your thighs, the cold air hitting your core.
"this okay?" matt asks you, his hands massaging your thighs, his thumb kneading into the skin. "can you talk to me, sweetheart?"
"more than okay," you force yourself to speak with a frantic nod. "just touch me — please."
matt smiles, and your mouth drops in a silent gasp as you feel his fingers touch your pussy, spreading your folds and dipping his middle finger in your arousal, chuckling lowly in your ears as your hand leaves his hair to grab onto his wrist for support.
he mutters praises when his finger pushes through your opening, thrusting in once and out before adding a second finger to stretch you open, curling them upwards when he's buried knuckle deep in your warmth.
"fuuuck—"
"you're gonna have to be quiet if you want to continue this," matt warns you, his tone sharp. he halts his movements as he peeks through the shelves to observe the area, seeing students still with their noses shoved into their studies. "we're in a library, sweetheart. did i make you forget that already?"
you click your tongue against your teeth, "you're talking pretty confidently for someone who is breathing heavily in my ear every time i move against you..." you crane your neck to look at him, a smirk creeping onto your lips as you see the surprised look on his face. "what? did you think i wouldn't notice? matt... i thought you were smarter than that."
matt doesn't say a word because he knows you're right. he's hard — cock straining uncomfortably in his pants, and with your ass rubbing over his sensitive tip every time you press back into him, it sends him spirally, unable to control the heaving breathing in your ears.
it always fascinates him knowing how he's the one with his hands shoved between your thighs, yet you are the one that always seems to be in control.
but he has you quietly gasping once again as he starts up his movements, pumping his fingers into your pussy with his thumb rubbing your clit at an angle that has you trembling. your lips press together tightly, your back is arched, and your head lays limp on his shoulder as you grind on his hand, meeting his pace and sending your body into overdrive — body buzzing with each pump of his fingers.
the tension only builds more within the pit of your tummy when you see a student rise from their seat, heading towards the shelves to grab their needed book. they don't walk over in your direction, they don't even look in your direction — completely unaware of what's going on a few aisles down, but yet there's a small part of you that wonders what would happen if they just turn their heads to the left just a little more, to see the sight of your boyfriend fingering your beneath your skirt, pressed up against your body while covering your neck and shoulder in wet kisses.
realistically, you don't want to get caught. but the thought of it is enough to squeeze your thighs around matt's hand and cry out quietly.
"you're close, sweetheart.." matt states against your skin, knowing your body all too well. his movements are slow due to you caging his hand with your thighs, to he decides to circle his thumb over your sensitive nub. "do you want me to make you cum like this, pretty girl?" you're unable to speak, too struck with how he plays with your clit. "talk to me. y'know i won't do anythin' if you don't talk to me."
"i... i don't want to cum like this," you tell him quietly, watching as the student sits back down in their seat. the grip you have on matt's arm tightens, nails subtly pinching his skin. "want to cum on your cock — need to cum on your cock."
"you need to?"
"want to make you feel good—" you pause to pant heavily, your body jerking as he presses harder on your clit. "—need to make you feel good too."
"so fuckin' thoughtful, aren't you, sweetheart?" matt teases as he slips his fingers away, and you mewl at the emptiness with a pout, almost regretting at stopping so short, but you're reminded what's about to come when you hear him shuffling behind you, freeing his cock.
you yearn for him, wanting nothing more than to feel him inside of you, and you're on the verge of raising your voice to show your impatience until you feel his hands bunch your skirt around your hips before squeezing your ass in his palms.
you can't hide the grin on your lips as you provoke him, rubbing yourself back into him and letting out a squeak of surprise when he sends a sharp slap to your ass in warning for you to be patient. you listen to him despite the internal struggle, and you almost lose yourself when he rubs the tip of his cock through your puffy folds.
you brace your hands on the shelf in front of you, the tips of your fingers brushing against the books, and you snort when you see a book about mushrooms and fungi — a little something to remind yourself exactly where you are, but you don't care, not when you can feel matt slowly ease his cock into you, stretching you out to fit snug around him.
matt's hands are firm on your waist when he begins rocking his hips into your at a slow and leisurely pace, rubbing his cock along your walls, and the ache burns pleasurably around your thighs — his size never ceasing to amaze you.
you clench around him with laboured breaths, wanting him deeper, wanting him to go faster and fuck you against the shelf like you truly deserve, but he keeps at his steady pace, whispering affections and praises in your ear.
"fuck," you mutter, rolling your hips back into him. "feels so good, matt."
"yeah?" matt hums, his tongue licking the shell of your ear. "my cock is made just for you, sweetheart... all for you."
you breathe out shakily in response, "m'all for you too."
"fuck, i know, sweetheart," his voice trembles, his hand sliding down between your thighs to play with your clit as his pace quickens. "i know."
he pushes your legs further apart with a light tap of his foot and you spread them quickly, the grip you have on the shelf tightening with each deep thrust of his hips, his fingers rubbing circles on your clit sending your mind whirling. your body starts to shake, and you wonder if you're able to continue to keep yourself upright, taking a glance at the shelves to see if it jolts in time with your body, but you fail to notice when matt suddenly slips out of you.
he carefully turns you around to face him, and your back is uncomfortably shoved against the shelf, the wood digging sharply into your spine. matt's hand slides around the back of your thigh to grip, hooking your leg up over his hip and ducking his head down to kiss you as he slides his cock back into you with an airy sound, almost similar to a whine.
you kiss him back immediately, knocking against his glasses as you turn your head to the side to kiss him deeper, lips moving in sync with his as his hips start to move again. him thrusting his cock so lazily and slow inside almost brings you to tears at how good it feels, hitting all the right spots that has your leg curling around his waist, trying to pull him in deeper.
his hand that isn't holding your thigh delicately caresses your cheek as his tongue prods into your mouth, dancing with your own as his cock hits a certain spot within your gummy walls that has you reeling back, sucking in a deep breath as your orgasm slowly starts to build.
you thread your fingers through his hair, tugging at the roots once again and matt moans quietly, his breathing getting heavier as he stares at you with his darkened gaze.
"i'm..." matt swallows thickly. "i—"
"what?" you ask him, brushing his bangs out of his eyes and fixing his glasses, crooked from the kiss. matt doesn't answer for a while and you grow concerned, stilling his thrusts as you press your leg into his side to get him to stop. "matt, what's wrong?"
"i'm—shiiit—m'sorry, i—fuuuck," he's unable to complete his sentences as his hips start up once again, suddenly thrusting into your pussy at a speed that has your mouth dropping open in shock, your hands immediately gripping his shoulders to stabilise yourself. "i can't—fuck, baby—i need—"
you struggle to keep yourself quiet as you moan his name aloud and matt immediately shushes you, his hand covering your mouth, not even bothering to check around to see if anyone has heard you as he keeps his eyes locked on yours, but the eye contract deems to much for him as he lets out a small whimper of affection.
your own hand comes around to cover his mouth to keep him quiet, and you both stay like that, his hips erratically thrusting into yours, your cunt sucking his cock in deep as you stare into each other's eyes, all sounds muffled behind your palms.
your thighs start to shake with each frantic thrust he gives you, too wrapped up in the tightness of your warmth to notice how you're so close to cumming, and you try your best to grind your hips to meet his pace.
matt curses beneath your palm as his body jolts suddenly, his eyes widening before rolling to the back of his head behind his foggy glasses, hips snapping forward with one particular hard thrust, and you feel him fill you up with his cum. the sight of his face alone is enough to tip you over the edge, your walls convulsing around his cock as you shudder, your orgasm hitting you like a wave.
you're quivering, unable to stop the light trembles of your body as the euphoric feeling takes its course through your veins with silent cries. matt slumps against your, eyelashes fluttering as she tries to regain his focus, his hand dropping from your mouth to curl around your waist beneath your shirt, the skin on skin contact calming him down.
"you.. you lose," you tease softly through pants, removing your hand from his mouth to touch his cheek and he smiles, leaning into your palm.
"didn't know it was a competition to see who cums first," he licks at his lips before pressing a soft kiss to yours, "does uh, does that mean i won the other times?"
"whatever," you roll your eyes playfully, kissing his lips once more before you mutter. "let's get out of here before someone comes back here and notices.. please."
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© STURNIOZ
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ldrfanatic · 4 months ago
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this happens once every few lifetimes
mattheo riddle x reader
synopsis - reader transfers to hogwarts from ilvermorny. she and mattheo fall in love with each other at first sight.
warnings - none, i think?
listened to while writing - the alchemy by taylor swift
i have a clara bow theo one in the works right now that i'm excited to drop at some point. ngl this gif of benjamin in deadly class inspired this idea A LOT.
part two?
slytherin boys works
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you waited with baited breath outside of the great hall.
any moment now the doors would swing open and albus dumbledore, who you knew only through legend, would announce your transfer to hogwarts.
it was terrifying honestly. leaving ilvermorny was indescribably difficult. but when your father got a job opportunity at the british ministry of magic, it was decided. already you were feeling overwhelmed. you'd done your research but hogwarts was much larger than ilvermorny. it was much older as well, and thus had gained a reputation over a thousand years of producing some of the greatest witches and wizards the world has ever seen.
the large magnificent doors opened and every pair of eyes was on you.
you walked forward with sweaty palms, subtly attempting to dry them on your plain, black hogwarts robes. another change. the wardrobe was much more strict here than back in america. and where every student at ilvermorny wore the same blue and gold, students at hogwarts wore colors representative of their house.
finally, you reached the end of the walkway and stood face to face with a dusty and rather ancient looking hat. to your light surprise, it spoke. a woman whom you'd met briefly beforehand, professor mcgonnagall, picked up the hat gently and motioned for you to sit on the stool.
it was time to be sorted into one of hogwarts four houses. you'd been in wampus, the house of the warrior, at ilvermorny, and despite hours of research, you couldn't distinguish what the hogwarts equivalent would be. all four houses seemed to be good choices but there was one in particular that stood out to you.
no shorter or longer than exactly fifteen seconds after the sorting hat touched your head, a declaration was made.
"slytherin!"
an older student in green robes gestured you over to the table on the far right. not wanting to sit at the very front and continue to be gawked at, you briskly walked a little further down and took a seat at the middle of the table.
once you'd taken your seat, dumbledore began to explain that hogwarts would be hosting the triwizard tournament this year. after a flashy introduction from beauxbatons and durmstrang, you effectively decided that you were not the most interesting shiny new toy at hogwarts this year and silently thanked the universe for this turn of events.
at last, it was announced that you could eat and the tables filled with food. all around you students' plates began magically creating complex dishes. there were even some dinners that held food that you were sure you couldn't see anywhere on the table.
frustrated, you stared down at your empty plate. it was a long journey to hogwarts. you were hungry and quite frankly tired of things being so different. if one more complicated situation made its appearance at this school, you were undoubtedly going to lose it.
"just think about a food you really want to eat. it can be anything."
a boy next to you with brown hair and bright blue eyes leaned over. a thick italian accent levied on his deep voice.
you closed your eyes and thought about a delicious juicy cheeseburger with golden-crisp french fries. sure enough, when you opened your eyes, your plate had filled with food.
absolutely giddy with glee, you turned to thank the mystery man.
"no problem. i'm theodore nott. this is draco malfoy next to me."
the platinum blonde boy didn't even look up to acknowledge your existence. theodore, seemingly sensing your mild displeasure, spoke up.
"don't mind him. welcome to slytherin house. riddle, say hello to our newest recruit."
the dark haired boy directly across from you who you assumed was 'riddle' did in fact look over from his conversation with a boy with a chestnut colored complexion. yet, when your eyes found his, he didn't say hello.
he didn't say anything actually. he just sort of stared. as you held eye contact, it was like lightning running through your veins and sizzling at your fingertips.
for a moment, you wondered if he'd ever seen a person before.
then, as if he'd snapped out of a daze, a gentle smile played at his lips. dark curls fell over his brown eyes that seemed to sparkle the longer you looked at them.
his large hand crept over the table until it was outstretched towards you with a kind smile.
"mattheo."
you shook his hand with a shy smile. mattheo was currently looking at you like you were the only thing that mattered. in fact, your little interaction had gone on so long that theodore and the boy mattheo had been speaking with had both strucken up conversation with other students at the table.
"y/n."
mattheo eyed your appearance. his gaze flickered across your face, then to your hair, and all over the parts of your body he could see.
"sorry if this is a little awkward, but i can't remember the last time i was this captivated by someone." mattheo finally released your hand and you had to stop yourself from begging him not to.
"welcome to slytherin house. you're in the snake's nest now, beautiful."
---
7.8.2024
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this-machine-runs-on-coffee · 2 months ago
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I think 20 probably
Don't know why but I think 20
me: *reads over symptoms of autism once again* “see but i don’t get upset over changes in routine, we change the routine all the time and i’m totally okay with it!”
also me since i was a kid: *gets irritated, stressed, angry, aggravated, and depressed for the rest of the day after something is switched to another day* *gets angry, stressed, and depressed, and has a breakdown when i find out we have to cancel plans, even if i didn’t really wanna go to wherever we were planning to go* *gets aggravated and is easily upset and is depressed the whole day after i get to cancel something that i had been planning for but also are relieved that i don’t have to go since i really didn’t want to* *is depressed, angry, irritated, and stressed after we cancel plans that i had zero feelings for up until that point* etc.
#<- Considering as there were a lot of tags that were kind of separated between the two posts I will mainly just reply like this#Firstly I genuinely wanted to thank you for being so nice and I am also really glad that you found the explanations helpful#<<< thank you for being nice to me and giving me helpful explanations#With regards to what you were saying about having learnt some social norms in order to fit in a bit more#That does rather sound like masking#Also#With regards to what you said about irony and sarcasm#It does rather sound like autism#<- This as well#<<< ah ok thank you#I hope it helped and I am absolutely hear to try to answer any more questions that you might have#<<< thank you genuinely you're a very kind person#I will probably also do some research on ASD over the next couple of days so when I make it I can tag you to that post if you like#<<< i'd love it if you could tag me#I think the first one on my list is ADHD though#<<< that's completely fine i want to know more about adhd as well so i can understand a friend more#Do you think that the people around you are rather supportive of neurodiversity and would they be okay if you told them?#<<<< my mother and my therapist agreed to have me do a test to diagnose me#it's taking months (because long time in between therapy sessions bc summer) but they are supportive even if they don't know much about it#this year especially because last year it was a bit worse but now we're finding out some things might actually be because of sensory issues#so they try to help us out a bit (me and a sibling) and let me wear earbuds during mealtimes because i hate the sound of chewing it hurts#Sorry if that was slightly intrusive#I was just kind of wondering if you would want to get a diagnosis#Though of course it is not at all obligatory and it might not be a good idea if you don't feel safe doing so#Particularly if you are a minor and if you don't think people like your parents would support you#<<< don't worry it's completely fine also i am getting a diagnosis even if i don't think i have it#Sorry that turned slightly dark#I might be projecting slightly based on what I think my parents' reaction would be like#<<< it's completely fine! I hope you find support in your family too#I am absolutely hear to listen if you ever want to discuss this or anything else further!
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hgfictionwriter · 3 months ago
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Self Control: Part Six - Friends
Jessie Fleming x Reader
Summary: Jessie wants to give you the world. And when she's away from you, you miss each other terribly. And how will Janine and Sinc react when they find out the good news?
Warnings: G!P smut. Phone sex. Masturbation (and getting caught). Language.
A/N: Mostly fluff, but a sprinkle of smut in there as well ;) I’m also not promoting one birth plan over another - that’s totally personal to each person/couple and this is just a story! Rest of the series can be found here.
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You were curled up against Jessie on the couch, your knees tucked in and leaning against her leg. You were on your phone and she idly caressed your thigh as she only half-intently watched a documentary on TV. Her mind was preoccupied with various thoughts when you piped up.
"We're all set for the midwife's visit tomorrow, right?" You asked.
"Hm?" Jessie asked idly before giving her head a subtle shake and coming to. "Yeah, we're set."
Jessie watched you as you nodded and returned to your phone. You floated the idea out there early on to do a home birth and, although you were both tentative - safety and concern top of mind - Jessie loved the idea of you two bringing your little one into the world in the comfort of your own home instead of a cold, impersonal hospital room.
You'd both done research into risks, what was involved, and talked with Dr. Mal about options. She connected you with a midwifery practice that offered collaborative care with her clinic. They'd still go for major appointments at Dr. Mal's, but all information would be available to both and Jessie and you would get more personal, flexible care through the midwife. Between that continuity of care and upon meeting the team, Jessie relaxed.
Tomorrow your midwife would stop by your apartment for a home visit to explore if it was an option and to further talk through birth plans.
In fact, that's kind of what was on Jessie's mind. She chewed the inside of her lip and toyed with the hem of your shorts.
"What's wrong?" You asked, interrupting her thoughts and causing her to look at you in surprise once more. You smirked at her. "You're fidgeting."
"Just thinking," Jessie said slowly, almost pouting though she finished with a short laugh.
"Yeah? What about?" You asked as you gently played with her hair and awaited an answer.
Jessie pulled you onto her lap, you releasing a laugh as she maneuvered you. Your fingers automatically laced around the back of her neck and her hands rested on your waist as she looked up at you.
"I'm just wondering if this visit tomorrow might be a bit moot. At least part of it." She held back a smile at how you screwed up your face at her. Her gaze flit away and she shrugged. "I just don't know if we'll be giving birth here."
"What do you mean?" You asked. "I thought we both wanted that. I mean, yes, we need a hospital transfer plan, but I thought the goal was to have the baby here," you went on, concern creeping onto your features.
"But what if I want to buy us a house?" Jessie asked nonchalantly, allowing a hint of a smile to cross her lips.
You shook your head out. "I'm sorry - what?" Jessie laughed, rubbing her hands up your sides.
"A house," she repeated as if it was simple and obvious. Now she smiled fully at you. "We could use more space. You have to admit - it's going to be a bit tight in here as our kid gets older. And, you know, we talked about the possibility of a second," she finished, her smile turning shy. She watched as you seemed to ready a rebuttal, but ultimately relented.
"I suppose. But we can make it work for a while," you compromised. Jessie gave you a look.
"Why though?" She asked. "We have the money. It would be nice to get settled into a new home before the baby arrives, not fighting for every foot of space for items. Plus the noise," Jessie went on as she gestured down the hall.
"I see you've put some thought into this," you said with a smirk as you tucked her hair behind her ear.
"Maybe." She grinned, before growing earnest. "I want us to have a home together. I know this is our home, but...I want a house for us. I want a yard where the little one and I, "she rest her hand on your still-flat stomach, "can kick the ball around. Run around the backyard. Water fights in summer. And if there's ever snow - build a snowman together. Maybe I can build them a little treehouse, too. Buy a dog!"
A smile had crept onto your face as she spoke with increasing enthusiasm. She waited quietly as you contemplated. It only took you a few seconds before gave an affectionate roll of your eyes.
"Domestication is hitting you hard, Fleming," you teased before you leaned in to kiss her.
"This is what I've always wanted," Jessie said quietly before cracking a faint smirk. "I can't help it if it took so long to meet you." You rolled your eyes good-naturedly at her once more, spurring a wave of affection in her.
"Charmer," you deadpanned as you kissed her again; slowly this time. "Fine. A house it is. But none of this ‘I’m buying a house for us’ business. We will buy a house together.”
“Deal.”
-------
"Hey, baby," you greeted, your voice feeding through Jessie's airpods as she sat on her bed, knees up with her arms resting on them as she held up her phone in front of her as she Facetimed you. "I didn't expect a call from you."
"I know," Jessie said, smiling quietly at you through the screen. "Janine and a few others are checking out some shops in town here. Figured I'd take it an opportunity to get some solitude."
"So you called me," you teased.
"Of course," she replied easily, tilting her chin up rather pleased with herself. "How are you feeling?"
"Good," you told her, holding up crossed fingers so she could see. "I don't want to jinx anything, but...maybe this second trimester, no morning sickness thing may be true."
"I really hope so," Jessie told you earnestly. "I know how hard it's been for you." You raised your eyebrows in agreement, but smirked at her.
"Thankfully, I have a very thoughtful, doting girlfriend who took great care of me throughout."
"Least I could do," she laughed and you arched an eyebrow.
"Yeah, actually. I guess that's true," you agreed before laughing furthermore. "Still. I appreciate you." You went on. "So, enough about me. How's Orlando? How was practice today?"
Jessie relayed how the day went and any little quirks that had come up.
"I saw the videos your team put up today of training," you relayed. "You looked amazing."
"Oh." Jessie laughed, somehow still blushing after all this time. "Well, thank you."
You whined. "I wish that sexy body of yours was over here instead."
"Oh," Jessie said again, further caught off guard though a small smile tugged at the corner of her mouth. "You really are feeling better."
"Yeah," you said, nodding earnestly. "And I'm fucking horny. It's worse than before, Jess. I swear."
Jessie averted her gaze, suddenly extra alert and nervous about her whereabouts. Sure, she was in her room, but still. She looked back to you and gave you a coy smile.
"Well. I wish I was there to help you," she said simply. You groaned and rolled your eyes and entirely not in the way she was accustomed to.
"Babe," you whined. "You have to do better than that."
"I can't right now," Jessie whispered unnecessarily as she peered around. You pouted.
"I thought you said Janine went out."
"She did," Jessie said with a small sigh of exasperation. It's true - she should be gone for a while. She was paranoid still, but logically speaking, she did have a window of opportunity.
"Fine," you said, relenting with a mild eye roll. You took a breath to reset and started anew. "So what's tomorrow looking like for you guys?"
"Well, hold on," Jessie interjected, not happy with how things ended. Her gaze darted left to right in the empty room until she settled on you again with a small gesturing nod. "If you're so worked up," she paused momentarily, a smirk forming, "why don't you tell me how worked up you are."
You gave her a scrutinizing, lingering look before you set your shoulders back and gave a faint smile of victory.
"Not sure you deserve to know," you taunted with a glint in your eye. Jessie's jaw fell agape, affronted by your accusation.
"Baby," she implored. "I want to know more than anything." Her breathing deepened subconsciously. She whispered. "Now, be a good girl, slip your fingers inside your underwear and tell me how wet you are for me."
You groaned again, this time exactly in the way she wanted you to. She watched intently as you bit your lip and she could see your shoulder moving and flexing as you began to touch yourself.
"Oh fuck, Jess." Your eyes drifted shut as you made contact and all she could do was sit there as your shoulders rose and fell, your head tossed back. You opened your eyes to look at her. "I'm absolutely dripping for you." You moaned softly, eyes falling shut once more. "I need you so bad."
Jessie exhaled steadily, needing to avert her gaze, but that doing nothing to limit the effect your husky voice and needy moans were having on her. She bit her lips together, eyes trained on the wall as she tried to will away the sensation of her cock starting to swell with arousal. You really were a siren call to her and no matter how many times she had you, she was still powerless under your influence.
"God, I wish I was riding your cock right now," you breathed. Jessie's eyes screwed shut at the vision of it and she cleared her throat. Despite her intentions, she opened her eyes once more to look at you and was met with video of your body writhing as you continued to pleasure yourself.
"Babe, you gotta cool it," Jessie urged you as she glanced down to see her shorts tenting. You opened your eyes, hooded with lust, to look at her with a cocky smirk.
"Why? Is my baby getting worked up?" You asked knowing damn well what the answer was. "Do you need my mouth on your cock? I love when you gently nudge the back of my throat, your hips softly bucking, when I know full well you want to fuck my throat."
"Jesus," Jessie hissed, eyes averting once more as her cheeks began to flash crimson.
"Or should we just cut straight to it. Me bouncing up and down on your thick cock. It feels so incredible when you fill me up." You moaned. "I love when you take it slow, taking such good care of me, so attentive. But nothing beats when you lose control and you fuck me like your life depends on it. Like there's nothing else in this world."
"Oh God," Jessie groaned through grit teeth as she looked up at the ceiling. She didn't need to check to know that her shorts were fully tented now.
"Shit," she mumbled as she reached under her waistband and into her shorts. Her eyes shut as soon as she wrapped her hand around her hard on. "God, what you do to me," Jessie said.
She blew out a steady breath as she circled her sensitive head with her thumb.
“Mm, fuck, I’m so hard for you, babe. I just want to be inside of that hot, tight pussy of yours,” she said. You moaned in her ear and she reciprocated. "I wish-"
A cold wave of panic went over her as her moment of relief was cutoff by the sound of the hotel door unlocking and swinging open.
"Jess, have you seen my wallet?"
"Fuck," Jessie hissed under her breath as she retracted her hand from her shorts as fast as possible. She turned away from the entryway where Janine and who knows else would be appearing any moment now. Her hands shook she frantically snatched up a pillow and clutched it to her as she laid on her side and tried to look like she was casually Facetiming you. She couldn't mask the glare she shot you as you stifled laughter.
"Oh hey," Jessie feigned faint surprise as Janine, Kelli and Sam appeared.
"Hi," Janine said absently as she began tossing clothes around as she looked for her wallet. "So have you seen my wallet?"
"No," Jessie said curtly, eyes on the blonde and then the others briefly before facing you once more.
"Can they hear me?" You asked quietly and Jessie narrowed her eyes at you in another glare as she did her best to ignore the incessant throbbing between her legs. "No," she nearly grumbled.
Kelli leaned over Jessie's laying form and waved at you. "Hi wifey!" You waved back entirely casually as though you weren't just fingering yourself 10 seconds ago.
"Jess can you get up and help me look," Janine complained as she continued to tear the room apart.
"Find it yourself," Jessie refuted with a frown. Janine grumbled and stomped over to the brunette, snatching her phone and one of her airpods out of her ear to wear it. Jessie leaned up slightly to try to grab it, but couldn't fully without risking losing her cover.
"Hi, love," Janine greeted sweetly before her face fell. "Can you tell Jessie to get up and help me?"
"Uh, I can try," you said slowly, holding back a laugh. Jessie could still hear you in the remaining earpiece. "But she's tired from practice. I bet Kelli's great at scavenger hunts."
Janine rolled her eyes at you and huffed. "Should've known you'd side with her." She sighed once more and grabbed the pillow, giving it a tug. Jessie held onto it tightly. At this, Janine frowned.
"What the- come on, Jess," she implored as she tugged harder on the pillow, Jessie reciprocating the same.
"Just take my wallet," Jessie complained. "I'm trying to rest and talk to my girlfriend. Leave me alone."
In a flash, all three of her teammates reamed on the pillow and left Jessie still fully tented shorts exposed. Janine literally screamed and covered her eyes, while the others gasped and started laughing riotously.
"Fuck off," Jessie yelled as she grabbed the other pillow and sat up laying it on her. Her face burned immensely hot as she swatted at her friends to get out.
"Oh my God, babe," she heard you say through conflicted laughter. "I'm so sorry." Janine yelled again and tossed the phone onto the bed like it scalded her and she gave Jessie back her airpod.
"You can have her back," she yelled for you to hear. "And yeah. I'm taking your wallet. Oh my gosh, you two. It's only been a day. Get it together."
-------
It was no surprise when Jessie received relentless teasing from the entire team the following day. She pouted and grumbled, trying now and then to deflect with bravado, but for the most part she spent the better half of the day with her hood up, blushing and dodging jokes. Thankfully, by the time the ride to the stadium came around people had mostly moved on.
She'd texted with you throughout the day, you commiserating and apologizing for yesterday's event. She wasn't actually mad; it was fun while it lasted and she just didn't like attention at the best of times, never mind for something like this.
The game went well, Jessie played the full 90 and though she didn't log an assist or a goal, her stats were still solid and she felt good about things.
That evening, back at the hotel she sat around with Janine and Sinc. She was grateful that even after retiring from club play, Sinc came on staff as an offensive coach for forward and attacking midfielders.
They were all chatting when Jessie's phone buzzed. She looked to see a message from you. It was a listing for a house along with a message:
A south facing yard just for you and our little one. So you can play football together until the late hours of the night.
"I'd ask, "What's got you smiling like that?" but honestly, I'm afraid to," Janine quipped. “And I don’t need to ask ‘Who’.”
Jessie lifted her head in delayed recognition of Janine's question, only afterward realizing she was still smiling.
With you now officially just entering your second trimester, you were at a stage where you could share the news. She wanted to tell her friends before a more formal announcement went out to acquaintances and others. You told her to do it whenever and however felt right. She didn't know how that looked, but, sitting here with two of her oldest friends, it seemed clear.
"Um," she started, putting her phone away and taking a breath, she ignored how they both frowned at her. "I was smiling because Y/N and I are looking at buying a house."
Janine's jaw dropped in surprise and Christine nodded in approval. Janine started asking a million questions and Jessie calmly cut her off.
"There are lots of reasons we'd want a house, but, the biggest is," she paused, shrugging lightly, "we need the space. Because, our family is growing." She could see the wheels turning inside their heads and she smiled as she went on. "Y/N's pregnant. We're having a baby."
If Janine was surprised before, she was absolutely beyond now. Even Sinclair's jaw hit the floor.
Before Jessie knew it, Janine flung herself across the space between them and threw herself onto Jessie in a bear hug.
"Oh my God!" She exclaimed. "That is so exciting! I'm so happy for you!" When she pulled back, tears were in her eyes, immediately causing tears to spring to Jessie's. Something seemed to spark in Janine’s mind as she paused, all excitement on hold as she eyed the brunette. "Wait - you're excited, right? It's a good thing?"
"Oh my God," Jessie frowned as she gave Janine a light shove. "Of course it's a good thing. This was planned," she said in exaggeration. "Geez." She rolled her eyes. "I'm very excited."
"Okay, great," Janine said, all of her previous enthusiasm coming right back. "Oh my gosh! I want to plan the baby shower. Wait - will she let me? Probably not. Well, I can throw one for you! Why not!"
"Okay, okay," Sinc said as she put a hand on Janine's shoulder and got her sit back down. "Give the woman some space to breathe. There's still lots of time for you to insert yourself into this whole journey," she joked, side-eying the girl.
Janine now settled, Sinclair got up and Jessie rose to be pulled into a hug.
"Congrats, kid," Christine said before chuckling. "Guess I can't call you that anymore."
She pulled back, holding Jessie by the shoulders as she smiled at her, giving a small shake of her head. "Crazy to think. I met you when you were just a kid. And since then you've built this incredible career - top teams, Olympic medals, National team captain," she said with a wink, "and you've never let any of it go to your head. Still just as humble and sweet today as you were back then. You met this awesome woman who makes you happier than I've ever seen you, and now you two are having a kid of your own. It's amazing. I'm proud of you and I'm so happy for you."
By now, Jessie was, rather unsuccessfully, blinking back tears. Sinclair chuckled, tousling Jessie's hair.
"But you're still a bit of a crier," she teased. "That's okay. That kid is going to be so lucky to have you as a parent. Couldn't ask for better."
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2soulscollide · 2 years ago
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Write your book STEP BY STEP
hello hello, it's me again!
today i'm bringing you a step-by-step / checklist to finally get your book done. i know it can be a bit complicated to put everything together to make your idea come to life (you're definitely not alone!)
that's why i compiled some tips and made this post, in hopes to help some author out there :D
let's get started.
PREMISE
assuming you already have a good idea in mind, you should start by writing a premise. to help you with that, try to answer these questions:
who is the main character?
what are their goals?
which troubles will they face / what's stopping them from achieving their goals?
do they have an opponent? if so, who?
now that you know the answers to these questions, it's time to write the premise. the premise consists in a sentence that summarizes your whole idea.
PLOT OUTLINE
there are infinite ways to plot your story. you can do it by writing down ideas and linking them together, following a scheme, or any other method.
the most common plot outlines are these:
synopsis outline: one to two pages, where you hit all the major beats of the story
in-depth outline: outline each chapter/scene
snowflake method: develop the premise into a bigger paragraph, and that paragraph into a page (etc.) until you have the whole outline of your story
booken method: plot the start and end of the story, and the main characters
the novel factory created plot sheets for free, and you can choose from eight different templates. you might want to check it out!
KNOW YOUR CHARACTERS
having your outline defined, you should start developing your characters now. the main character's profile might be more detailed than the others, however, it's up to you. there are many character sheets out there on the internet that will help you create flawless characters.
i have a post with resources that might be helpful when creating a character, check it out!
and here you have some prompts and sheets to create a character:
Quick Character Creator - EA Deverell
Extremely detailed character sheet template - @hawkasss
The Best Character Template Ever - Dabble
Character Twenty Questions Worksheet - The Writers Circle
at this point, you should also define the narrator's voice, tone, etc, as well as the pace of your novel.
LOCATIONS
define the principal locations of your story, the settings, and where the story is taking place. it's important to know how the environment looks, and how your characters feel about it.
for this part, you might find it useful to do some research about some locations, if you're not familiar with them. find inspiration on Pinterest, Tumblr, or even on books, paintings, and art. everything is valid.
if your story takes place in a fantasy environment, you might need to fill out a template to create it or write down the way you imagine it to be. try to get as many details as possible, so there are no holes when developing the novel.
SUBPLOTS
you might want to give more depth to your novel by developing a subplot (or more than one). make sure it doesn't get too confusing or that doesn't take the focus away from the main action.
the subplot can be a romance, another character's relationship, a character's arc, a backstory, etc. this will make your story more real and 3D, more realistic.
develop it as a side story and mix it with the principal plot but don't make it as important as the main story, otherwise, none of the plots will make an impact.
SYNOPSIS
write a synopsis as long as you wish, covering every important part of the story. this will help you to really know your idea, and have a solid structure for it. it can range from 500 to 2,500 words, but you don't have to restrict yourself to a number.
things the synopsis should cover:
the status quo
the complication
initial challenges
midpoint
further challenges
the low point
the climax
the resolution
DRAFT
and we get to the best part which is writing! now that you know everything about your story, characters, locations, and scenes, all you have to do is to put all that together in words. don't feel pressured to make everything look perfect already, just write what comes to your mind. if you have a new idea for the plot, good, write it down! if this character doesn't make sense anymore, okay, get rid of them. just go with the flow, following the structure you've planned, and everything starts to come to life.
i know it's so tempting to go back, read what you wrote, and start editing and polishing, but trust me, don't do that! it's a waste of time, and you will take so much more time to finish your first draft. in fact, i've given up on so many stories because of that...
just when you finish the first draft, you will re-read everything and start editing, fixing plot holes, changing what doesn't fit well, etc. but for now, just write, get the first draft done. enjoy the process, don't rush.
thanks for reading!
i hope this post was helpful!
also, you might be interested in this free workbook with over 90 pages and many exercises! check it out here: THE WRITER'S WORKBOOK
resources for this post:
How to Choose a Plot Outline Method: 4 Techniques for Outlining Novels
How to Write a Novel: A Step-by-Step Guide
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flamingpudding · 1 year ago
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Fictober23 Prompt: 8 - "Give me that, before anything happens."
Fandom: DPxDC
Rating: G
Warnings: -
"Don't touch that." Constantine said without even looking up from the book he was reading through for research. Phantom had joined the Justice League dark only recently and was still in that sort of mentor - glorified babysitting - state. It was just his luck that he lost in the stick draw and had now to 'mentor' the who-knows-how-old-he-truly-is Ghost King.
He should have stuck this job to Zatanna. The 'kid' was curious as a cat and apparently wanted to touch every good damn artifact in the House of Mysteries that Constantine had ever gotten his hands on.
"Don't touch that either." The Brite muttered without looking up, he was so close in figuring out the actual meaning of the curse placed on a good damn church bell that causes everyone who hears it to fall asleep at midnight sharp and wake up at 8 AM later like nothing happened. Behind his back Phantom stuck his tongue out at the man before reaching out to poke the artifact that caught his eye anyway. However the House of Mysteries had other ideas as it reconstructed itself at the right moment and put the artifact further away from Phantom.
The Ghost King pouted, crossing his arms and floated over to where Constantine was pouring over a curse seal. Phantom hummed as he looked over the Brites shoulder grinning. "Oh I didn't know you could use ghost speech for curses!"
"Say what now mate?!" John's head snapped to the side to stare at Phantom who was now floating over his shoulder. "It's in ghost speech? What even is that?"
The Ghost King had the nerve to give him an unimpressed stare that really made the Brite need a smoke, but he had given Zatanna his good damn word not to smoke around the 'kid', so that was a no.
"Ghost speech. The language of the Infinite Realms also known as the Ghost Zone, After Life, Hell, Home of the Damned, and so on and so on." Constantines eye twitched as the Ghost boy shrugged. He let out a suffering sigh and pushed his copie of the curse seal over to Phantom.
"What does it say?" The other blinked for a moment before turning his eyes to the photo. A scratching static white noise filled the Brite's ears and he yelped in pain, covering his ears. The noise instantly stopped and Contantine glared at the Ghost King who sheepishly scratched the back of his neck. "Sorry, I will say it again in English."
Constantine only grumbled something inaudible before motioning for the other to continue.
"You idiots don't sleep enough. Go and get at least eight hours of sleep. If you don't sleep by midnight I will be the one to make you sleep."
"The hell?"
"That's what's written there."
"Don't tell me we have another good damn Sandman problem on our hands." John gripped with one hand at his hair, he really hoped that wasn't it because dear good he did not want to get Batman or one of the other Not Dark heros involved.
"Nah, he goes by Nocturne, he never liked that name some philosophers came up with. But this does go against the agreement I had with him."
Was this how Batman felt when his Robins went against his orders? Or how the mentors of the Yonge Justice feel when the teens sass back? Because Constantine was sticking this ancient kid of a Ghost King onto Zatanna the next change he got.
"You know how to lift that curse then?" Instead of going further into a rabbit hole, Constantine decided it was easier to just find out if the Ghost King can lift a good damn curse he had been working on solving for days now instead of finding out who the hell Nocturne was now.
"Of course I know." Phantom answered easily, floating on his back around the room like he was going with the flow of water. Glowing green eyes going along the shelves where various books and artifacts were thrown on, in no particular order.
"Great. Let's go and fix this then." The man muttered, getting up from his chair and grabbing his coat. "I need a bottle of whiskey after this and a good damn smoke…"
Phantom just followed behind the man ready for his second official job with the Justice League Dark. He grinned happily of finally getting some outside action only to come to a sudden halt as the Brite man whirled around glaring at the Ghost King only inches from his the other.
"Phantom?"
"Yes?" The 'kid' answered nervously.
"Give me that, before anything happens. How often did I tell you NOT to touch anything of the artifacts? Do you even know what that thing does!"
Reluctantly like a reprimanded child the Ghost King handed over a golden plate with a glowing green crystal embedded into it, Constantine remembered it being the leftover part of a demon they had banished. The man narrowed his eyes. "The other one too."
"Fine…" Phantom handed over a crystal zepter, John had picked up from an ancient tomb. "Didn't think you noticed me picking them up, since you didn't say anything before I even touched them."
"Mate, you are forgetting who currently owns this house."
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thelibrarian1895 · 3 months ago
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Mandalorians hate Jedi because...
"the Jedi are child stealers" NO
And again I say NO. I saw someone claim this and it absolutely infuriated me.
First point, THE JEDI ARE NOT CHILD STEALERS. That accusation is sithspit anti jedi propaganda. If a parent or guardian told the Jedi no, they didn't want their kid to be a Jedi, the Jedi respected that. They would, however, remove children from danger. But would you call a social worker who took children from environments where they were being molested, starved, beaten, or worse, a child stealer? No? Then don't call the Jedi child stealers for the same actions.
Second point, the average Mandalorian didn't really know or care too much about Jedi. In all honestly, most Mandalorians, like the rest of the galaxy, had no real idea about the difference between Jedi or other force sects like the nightsisters or general darksiders or even the sith except perhaps the color of their lightsabers. Some Mandalorians, like our beloved Din Djarin, knew nothing at all about Jedi and only cared when in became relevant and then did as much research as possible regarding the Jedi. Others, like Jango Fett, had very personal interactions with Jedi and formed their opinions of the Jedi as a whole based on those interactions with no further reason or desire to look further into the Jedi.
Third point, for Mandalorians who studied history or listened to old stories, they knew why the Mandalorians disliked the Jedi and it was for a very simple reason that they liked to avoid actively admitting. That reason? The Jedi kicked the shebs of the Mandalorian armies.
Twice.
Quite possibly there was another point when the Jedi suppressed the Mandalorian empire but there were two times for certain. Granted, the republic played a large part and the Jedi definitely didn't all interfere in one of those two conflicts, and actually actively avoided one of those two conflicts except in a few cases, and there were definitely some terrible things done, but the fact remains that when the Mandalorian empire attempted to expand and basically take over the galaxy, the Jedi were key to stopping this. And no, the Mandalorian empire was not a good thing. But more importantly, if you thought your ancestors or your cultures' armies were in the right and they were beaten, would you like the descendants of those who beat your side?
Fourth point, would you like the side that beat your side if they refused to give you a proper rematch? The Mandalorians who know anything about Jedi know that Jedi have access to all this power, plus generally have a super cool plasma sword, but the Jedi won't fight or they'll de-escalate or generally indulge in pacifistic behavior and we all know how Mandalorians feel about presumed pacifists, right? A Mandalorian denied a fight is often a frustrated Mandalorian. A Mandalorian who sees someone who has all this strength and power often doesn't understand why that person doesn't use that power, doesn't take revenge or slaughter their enemies or a million other things that they would do with such power. So those that don't understand choose to dislike. Why won't the Jedi fight them?! (please imagine the sentence immediately previous spoken in an extremely whiney tone of voice)
Fifth point, the Mandalorians frequently throughout history worked with the Sith or were on the Sith side of conflicts because of a lack of knowledge about force sects meant the Mandalorians didn't generally realize how absolutely stupid it is to side with the Sith but beyond that the Mandalorians often learned about the Jedi from the Sith. So the Mandalorians got stories from the Sith about the Jedi being weak and cold and blah, blah, blah stupid sith propaganda that I don't want to perpetuate. And those Mandalorians would then think themselves Jedi experts, because hadn't they learned about the Jedi from another Jedi? Granted, a dark Jedi but still a Jedi, right? So they'd tell other Mandalorians the propaganda and so the Mandalorians had that Sith skewed idea of the Jedi perpetuated throughout their history.
So the Mandalorians have their own reasons for not like the Jedi, which have NOTHING to do with child stealing, just as the Jedi have plenty of reasons to want to avoid the Mandalorians. Personally though I'm going to blame a lot of those reasons on both sides on the Sith and be grumpy about the Sith and the effectiveness of their propaganda.
And finally, I'm pretty sure at least a tiny bit of the animosity between Mandalorians and Jedi arose from the Mandalorians being jealous that the Jedi had lightsabers and they didn't. To be fair, I'm a little jealous too. Lightsabers are cool.
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a-d-nox · 9 months ago
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web of wyrd: how to identify fame/popularity
the top left corner of the wyrd web can tell you about some of your talents/interests, the core tells you who you truly are, and the flow/career is like the midheaven of the wyrd web realm. that being said, these are basic premises; in no way does one number mean a single thing. each number can mean different and multiple things. these are simply my observations (also observations are not destined to be true; they are simply possibilities / increased odds). if you want to learn more about the major arcana, which is the basis for the web's numbers, click here!
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acting
3 (the empress): they are the real star of the show - the camera loves them
11 (justice): they can really step into a persona and become a character
artist
3 (the empress): they have an eye for detail; they are used to sitting still and observing the world. they have a creative instinct to creative because they are venus ruled
18 (the moon): they are very abstract visionaries and creators
breakdown / postmortem
13 (death): this is typically an unexpected occurrence that captures the attention of the masses
16 (the tower): famous breakdowns and even more sudden deaths
20 (judgment): they have a reawaken as to who they are that capture the world's attention
director
12 (the hanged man): the artistic eye for sure; it's because they are a neptunian that they can make their vision into a reality
fashion
11 (justice): i don't how often i can repeat this before everyone gets annoyed, but the fashion of 11 people is just iconic - they are trendsetters
infamous
16 (the tower): these people tend to be popular/famous for something morally unsavory
influencer
8 (strength): the giantess is the guiding hand that in encourages others
literally anything
10 (the wheel of fortune): these people are the type to blow up overnight and get "lucky" by becoming famous
17 (the star): they tend to have ups and downs in their time for popularity/fame but in the end they remain memorable in a lot of people's minds
21 (the world): tends to represent someone with a lot of rewards and fame after a long period of time
nepotistic
14 (temperance): the angel pours one cup into another - like a parent's talent into their child
one hit wonder
22 (the fool): these people tend to fall as soon as rise (due to being uranus ruled) - they take a single big leap then they are good
politics/legals
4 (the emperor): they can be great leaders - they use their powers for the greater good and to better the world around them
7 (the chariot): they tend to make great speeches that inspire the masses
11 (justice): they tend to be more wrapped up in the legal end of things or they are moderates in the political realm
religious leader
5 (the hierophant): they are often seen as wise and can gain a lot of worshipers/followers
research/educational
5 (the hierophant): they tend to make incredible discoveries that further the world around them
19 (the sun): they tend to make a discovery that changes the world around them
singer
3 (the empress): they have a magnetic energy that makes others want to listen to them and watch them preform their creativity
4 (the emperor): they tend to be great rappers and tend to make great diss tracks haha
6 (the lovers): these people are known for their sound and their appearance (they are considered gorgeous)
writer
6 (the lovers): this card is gemini ruled so writing is definitely their thing
9 (the hermit): these people can make their own world - they are good at illustrating their thoughts
12 (the hanged man): they are very good at multi-POV writing and making an idea very realistic
like what you read? leave a tip and state what post it is for! please use my "suggest a post topic" button if you want to see a specific pac/pile next. if you'd like my input on how i read a specific card or what i like to ask my deck, feel free to use the ask button for that as well.
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missadangel · 1 month ago
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The Heart of Rome (Marcus Acacius x Reader)
All Chapters List
Chapter 5: The Council
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Hi, guys I did some research on Rome, and they don't use the word princess. instead, they use rarely: filia regis so I mentioned in the story. But I will use the princess word to make it easier. I will make Geta softer than he looks in the trailers, but not much obviously. In history Caracalla kills Geta so I am writing my fic according to real history places, and tradition, events. if you have any advice let me know, thank you for all your support, so enjoy the episode...
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Si scio quid sit amor, propter te est.
If I know what love is, it is because of you. H.B.
Road…
The streets of Rome were fairly tranquil at night, in comparison to the bustling activity that characterizes the city during the day. It was particularly the case with the roads leading out of the city and into more remote areas. The general's villa was situated on one of these remote roads, and it was a somewhat lengthy journey to reach the city on foot. It might have been a good idea to use a horse or cart to traverse this road. But you were determined to continue on your journey, despite the discomfort you felt. You voiced your concerns to yourself and even considered turning back. You would have been pleased to rest in Marcus' bed, next to his warm body, his strong arms.  Yet, you were worried that you might regret not going ahead with your plan if you didn't do it. Even though you had these concerns, you decided to keep walking. As you got closer to the entrance to the big city, you suddenly noticed what sounded to be footsteps behind you.
You were reluctant to turn your head to see what was happening because a shiver ran through your whole body. It was as if the darkness of the night, which had been your friend a moment ago, had now become your enemy. Sounds, shadows and endless dirt roads were now his companions. When you started running, your legs were not as strong as you had hoped, and you experienced more discomfort than you had anticipated. Nevertheless, you ran with all your strength to reach the stone roads.
Subsequently, upon noticing your breathing becoming more rapid, you decided to take a moment to catch your breath. You were somewhat surprised but grateful when you realised that you were no longer being followed. Upon reaching the stone streets, you were somewhat reassured, but on the other hand, you felt a pang of sadness because you were further away from Marcus. The morning was fast approaching, with dawn on the horizon. From your observation point at the foot of the Venus statue in one corner of the street, you were clinging to the marble at the very end of the column and looking at the city panorama ahead, attempting to calculate the direction of Palatine Hill. The Colosseum is in a great spot, right in the center and visible from all sides. It's a bit of a landmark. So, it made sense to adjust the route to go forward and to the right. You still had a way to go, so you kept walking. You never expected it to be so difficult.
It's particularly when you're passing through these streets, places you've passed before, that your memories start to haunt you. It's as if these streets, which you used to pass by horse and cart, have now turned against you, becoming your enemy's friend. After a few quiet, dark streets, you stopped to rest under the triumphal arch. As you drove under the arch, you noticed something you hadn't seen before and were surprised.
The colossal statue of a former emperor that you had seen it before, but you hadn't had a chance to look at the inscription.
‘Imperator Caesar Lucius Septimius Severus Pertinax Augustus’
Your knees gave way, and you found yourself unable to stand. The stone pavements felt cold against your skin, but you remained still. As you gazed at the statue of your father, you found yourself thinking that perhaps things might have turned out differently if he had been there with you. You had never had the opportunity to witness first-hand what kind of an emperor he was, but from what you had heard, he had been quite successful. You spoke to him, your gaze fixed on his stone eyes, and wished he had heard you: “Father, my lord, I have made my decision. I have been thinking since I learnt about the letter. I came here even though you warned me, even though I knew it would be hard. My heart hurts, father, but I am not afraid. I met love, and I am not going to lose it. I love him so much. I know you hear me, and I know you understand. I am not angry with you. In fact, I am grateful. I met my brothers. You were right about Caracalla. Provide guidance on Geta. I saved him, Father, and I'm ready to face whatever comes next. I know you're with the Gods now, so I'm asking you to help me. I'll do whatever it takes for Rome. Open my eyes and ears, give me strength.”
You wiped away your tears and remained in a seated position for a period of time. However, when the cold became unbearable, you began to shiver. Before standing, you heard the distant cry of a horse, followed by the sound of hooves striking the ground. You wrapped your cloak around yourself tightly, burying your hair and face within it. The sound of hooves echoing in the silence of the night only served to heighten your nervousness.
As the horse drew nearer, you became aware of a slight tremor in the ground beneath your feet, caused by the horse's hooves striking it. You turned your head and observed a man who clothed in a dark cloak.
'My lady,' he greeted you.
When you looked at him, you felt a little surprised and perhaps a little uneasy, and said nothing. He opened his cloak and jumped down from his horse and approached you, still holding on to his horse's harness. The horse snorted noisily and you involuntarily took a few steps back.
"It is imperative that you come with me, as the situation is too perilous for you to remain here at this hour.”
"Who are you that I should agree to accompany you? Was it you who followed me previously?”
He bowed his head and replied, "Yes, my lady. I am a slave of Master Macrinus and I must take you to him."
You narrowed your eyes. ”What if I decline your offer?”
The man laughed, 'He thought you would say that. He said if she doesn't want to come, bring her by force, before she does something to hurt herself. Don’t let her to do, so.’
It was your time to laugh, 'How thoughtful of him. Tell him I appreciate the advice, but I have somewhere else to be right now.’
As soon as you turned around, you heard him coming towards you.
“My lady, I have to do as I'm told,” he said, coming up quickly behind you and grabbing your wrist. You tried to pull back with all your strength, but he was too strong. When he got close, you had a chance to get a good look at him. He had a very muscular and large body, which reminded you of warriors fighting in the Colosseum.
“Let go of my arm!” you cried.
But he had no intention of letting go, his strong hand locked around your wrist as if you were chained.
As he drew you closer to his horse, you heard another horse neighed from down the street, followed by a voice you recognised from before. It was a voice you would not forget, even if you were dead, a voice you felt your ears were made to hear.
The general spurred his black horse into a halt in front of you two. The horse reared under him and uttered a cry. He leapt down from the horse with one swift movement, his face as angry as ever, his eyes fixed on the other man. The general seized the man's hand that was gripping your wrist, pulled it and pushed with such force that the man staggered backwards. But he seemed to be angry too, and quickly regained his composure.
“How dare you lay a hand on her? State yourself, who are you?”
The General moved in front of you, taking charge and protecting you. You were relieved to see him. From behind, he appears to be dressed only in his tunic and cloak. It seems he may have left in a hurry, perhaps he was so worried, you wondered if he had opened the letter yet or not.
"General Acacius, Master Macrinus has given me a mission. I will complete it.”
"Macrinus? I just remember where I saw you before. Tell him I am Marcus Acacius, and I will prevent you from completing your mission.”
The man frowned and tensed as one hand went to the sheath of the sword at his waist. He was not afraid of the General at all.
"Marcus," you gently grasped his cloak and gave it a slight tug. He did not turn to you, still glaring at the man.
"Macrinus would like to take me to the council meeting, I believe he wants to ensure my safety until then. I apologise for not telling you before, I hope you can forgive me.”
Acacius turned his head and looked at you. His eyes conveyed a multitude of emotions, including anger, frustration, and longing.
"Nevertheless, I am unable to allow you to accompany him. I will take you to the meeting if that is your desire."
"No, the emperors may think you've been hiding me all this time. I won't let this happen to you because of me."
He closed his eyes and sighed deeply, as if trying to suppress his anger.
“Don't you realize how much I care about you? They've already seen you with me, so I'm prepared to face whatever consequences may result.”
You frowned. "I would never want to cause any damage to your reputation."
"Is that why you decided to leave me? What exactly you were planning, I wonder?”
You bit your bottom lip. “To go to Geta and tell him everything.”
Acacius' eyes flashed with anger. “I'm hoping you're joking right now.”
“He said he owed me, I thought he'd understand.”
“Do you really think he's as pure and kind-hearted as you? How can you be so reckless?”
"Perhaps he'll reconsider when I tell him I'm his sister.”
Acacius shook his head, “Wrong. He won't. He'll kill you on the spot, I'm sure of it.”
You were fairly certain that what he said was true, but you still had the inclination to believe it wasn't. Then, two more riders came down the street towards you and dismounted next to the other man. The General immediately sensed a potential threat and pulled you behind him for protection.
Macrinus knew exactly what he was doing and he was determined to see it through.
It is probable that his slave felt emboldened by the arrival of the other men, as evidenced by his demeanor, which shifted from apprehension to confidence.
"General, I advise you not to cause us any trouble. We're taking the lady with us.”
Acacius drew his sword and looked at them with a glint in his eye, ready for whoever or whatever was about to come at him.
"I dare you to try.”
They seemed to hesitate at first, looking at each other, then drew their swords, the tension rising. You swallowed hard.
"Three against one. I heard you were a good soldier, but you don't stand a chance against three of us." He smiled, but it seemed a little cruelly.
"You must have misheard then. I've killed more when I was in a worse situation." His voice was threatening, making the other person uneasy.
"Indeed, I had the opportunity to observe it at the Colosseum. However, we also fought there, so it would be unwise to underestimate us."
They fought there? At the Colosseum? Gladiators?
You had observed the combatants in action during your time there; you had witnessed it first-hand, with your own eyes, and it sent a chill down your spine.
You moved in front of the general, who was still pointing his sword at the others.
“Marcus, you need to let me go with them.”
“Absolutely not.”
“Please, hear me out, the council meeting is just around the corner, he can't do anything to me, he needs me.”
You grasped his other hand tightly with both hands and looked into his eyes.
“Please, I ask you to trust me.”
“He's the one I don't trust.”
“I know. I don't trust him either but I need to find out what his intention is before the meeting.”
Marcus looked at you for a moment, considering your words. Then he sheathed his sword. "Very well. You're right.”
The others seemed relieved, but they tried not to show it.
"A wise choice, General," the man said, his voice firm and his gaze steady. He gestured for the others to put their swords back, then approached you with purpose.
"Come with me, my lady," he held out his hand to you and the general caught it in mid-air.
"Who gave you permission to touch her?"
He pushed his hand away and grabbed your wrist. "I will be accompanying her.”
The man laughed and looked at you with disdain. "As you wish. That's fine by me."
As he walked away towards his horse, the general turned to you.
"I'm assuming you've ridden a horse before?"
You didn't ride much in Egypt, given that you lived inconspicuously.
"Well, sort of.”
The look on your face made him smile. He pulled you close to his horse. His black horse lifted one leg and just the tip of the hoof touched the ground, snorted heavily. Acacius stroked the horse's back gently. "You should know how lucky you are to be carrying this beautiful woman, Dromos. Be gentle with her.” The horse lets out a soft whinny as a reply, and Acacius smiles.
“Dromos?”
“Yes, I named him that because he runs so fast.”
“I see.You seem to be quite good friends,” you said with a smile. Hesitantly you reached out and stroked the horse’s neck, ran your fingers through the black of his mane.
“Indeed we are,” he agreed. He placed his hand on the stirrup and held it for you. “Place your foot here and I'll lift you up."
You did as he said, then he put his hand to your waist, lifted you easily and sat you on the thin saddle. When the horse moved, you grabbed onto the horn of the saddle to steady yourself. Then you felt a soreness between your legs but forced yourself to ignore. Acacius quickly climbed on top of the horse and positioned himself right behind you, gripping the reins. You felt safe as you felt his muscular body caressing yours from behind.
“Lead the way,” the General said loudly to the other man, you felt his warm breath just above your ear. The man nodded kicks his horse forward. Acacius gave a gentle pat to Dromos, he neighs, and starts to move faster. Acacius moves a little, closing the gap between you, his arms around you from either side as he holds the reins. Your body shook with the movement of Dromos as he galloped at a moderate speed through the streets of Rome. Your back kept bumping against the General's strong chest, and you even felt his chin in your hair. You gasped. Was he doing it on purpose?
You glanced over at his face and noticed a smile at the corner of his lips, even though his eyes were fixed on the road ahead.
“I’m guessing you’re upset with me?" you asked as the General pulled the rein to the right to steer it, top of your shoulder bumping his chest.
"For leaving me in bed and abandoning me?"
"And for not mentioning the letter before."
"That too.”
When you turned to look at him, a few strands of your hair got caught in his beard. The hairs kept flying with the wind, brushing against his face. He seemed pleased with them.‘
"I must admit that I was eager to find out who you are, but this is beyond what I could have imagined. I can understand why you did it, but I'm still hurt. I wish you hadn't left me in bed. You broke my heart.”
You swallowed, “Forgive me, I didn't know what to do. Leaving you was the hardest thing I've ever done. Will you let me heal your heart? I'm Medicus, you know?" You blinked your eyes under your long eyelashes, he smiled.
He buried his lips in your flowing hair and whispered in your ear.
"My heart is yours to heal. You don't need to be a medicus for that.”
You smiled as you felt his lips on your cheek, your lips yearning so much to touch his. At that moment, as you rode with him on his horse, you wished that he would take you far away, to a place where no one could find you two, you were willing to give everything for it.
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Macrinus’s Villa…
The men on horseback dismounted and led their horses into the courtyard. Acacius gently pulled his horse's reins and rode in a circle, glancing towards the villa. It seemed as though he was hesitating. Soon, Macrinus appeared in the doorway and grasped the bridle to the right, turning it around to face him.
"My lady," he bowed his head and greeted you. "General Acacius?”
Acacius ignored him and dismounted, one hand still clutching his horse's harness.
“Sir Macrinus, have you stationed your slaves outside my villa to keep watch? Or should I say your gladiators?”
Macrinus smirked. “I needed to make sure Lady Aurelia was safe.” He turned his eyes to you.
“I think you can rest assured that it's not something you need to worry about, especially when she's with me.”
“Which is why you must have accompanied her here, I see.”
“Apparently.” Acacius muttered.
“Then let me invite you in,” he gestured with his hand.
Acacius turned to you and held out his hand. “My lady.”
You smiled, initially surprised that he was addressing you with respect for the first time, but then realising how much you liked it. You took his hand and dismounted the horse and allowed yourself to be embraced by his protective arms. He took you gently and lowered you down.
As your feet touched down on the ground, you felt the throbbing return and let out a quiet moan.“Are you alright?” Acacius's voice was worried.
You regarded him with a somewhat hesitant expression. "I'm a little sore from..." You pursed your lips.
Acacius stroked your disheveled hair with his big hand. "I wish I could relieve your soreness.”
You blushed at the memory of witnessing how well his passionate lips worked on your body before.
“I'll take that as a promise for later, General.” You smirked mischievously.
“At your service, my lady,” he grasped your hand gently and kissed it.
As your heart melted in the warmth of his smile, Macrinus watched you from afar, his eyes narrowed in scrutiny. He felt something very different. He controlled his expression though and cleared his throat. You and the General looked at him, his warrior slave standing beside him. Acacius held out his hand, offering it to you.
“Shall we?”
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Sitting in his garden, you realized that Macrinus' villa was bigger than the General's. The fountain in the center of this big courtyard was rectangular, and in the center was a statue of the queen goddess Salacia, the wife of Neptune, the goddess of the sea and water. She's holding a bucket just above her head and the water is gushing out of it.
The columns ahead were white and straight, half covered with red marble, with ionic protrusions at the corners. They proudly stood among various trees and plants, but this beauty was nothing compared to the Domus Severiana. That palace was magnificent and wonderful.
Although you couldn't see it clearly because it was still dark, you were wondering what kind of flowers were behind the fountain when Macrinus' gladiator slave stood there, blocking your view. You met his gaze and turned to the general, who was standing next to you. He seemed uneasy and reluctant to sit down. His body language showing his tension. You reached out and grasped his hand.
"Would you perhaps like to sit with me?"
"My lady, I believe I will be more comfortable like this," he replied, his eyes on the gladiator who crossed his arms and looking at Macrinus as he approached.
“Apologies, I am expecting an important guest, I wanted to make sure he arrived safely,” he sat down opposite you and crossed his legs. A delighted smile spread across his face.
“I assume you brought the letter with you, my lady?” he said, looking at you.
You glanced at the General, to whom you entrusted the letter. He crossed his arms and looked directly at Macrinus.
“Prior to that, elucidate your intentions regarding the council.”
"I'm going to make sure our lady gets her 'filia regis' (princess) title back and gets what's rightfully hers. You know, general, you were what, twenty? You must have been about that age when Aurelia was born. Septimius gave me the task of taking her away to protect her. He made me promise.”
"I was nineteen," the General stated, his eyes distant as he recalled those days. "And you were the one who made up the lie that she drowned in the river when she was little? You actually took her to Egypt? With that man, Vicius."
He turned his head to look at you, to see your expression. You felt sad when you remembered him, but you gave the general a half-smile anyway.
“There were three hundred days of mourning throughout the empire,” Macrinus gave you a half smile. “Then it was forgotten when it was time for Caracalla's fifth birthday, but the people of Rome must still remember their princess. The year you were born was a very prosperous one, the fields were full of new crops, there were hardly any beggars in the streets.”
A soft smile spread across Acacius' face, you wondered why, but you didn't feel comfortable to ask when Macrinus around.
“Wine,” Macrinus ordered one of the other slaves. “My lady, please eat something,” he said, indicating the food on the table. “You need to gather your strength.” Then he looked at Acacius who shook his head. “I should head out to dress properly for the Council,” he said and turned to you and got down on his knees. "My Lady, I will be ready to provide any assistance you may require at the council today."
“No, General, I cannot allow you to do that.”
He looked confused.
"Perhaps it would be better if I said that I've kept my name a secret from you.”
“They've already seen us together,” he protested. “I don't think they'll care about that.”
"Lady Aurelia is right, General. It would not be good for you to make your side clear, at least from Geta's point of view. Half the council already knows everything and we have the upper hand."
"Marcus, please," you grabbed his big hand with both of yours. "I don't want you to stay in the middle of this.”
He took both your hands in his, his beard brushing against your skin. "As you wish. but know that if things don't go our way, I will do my utmost to ensure your safety." He kissed you gently on the top of your hands and stood up. "I will see you at the Council then." He nodded and left the courtyard. With his leaving, you felt abandoned, out of place.
Macrinus' gladiator-slave accompanied the general out into the courtyard and returned a moment later. As his eyes met yours, you turned your head.
“I wonder why you keep gladiators as slaves in your villa?”
Macrinus smiled, shaking the wine glass in his hand, “Choosing gladiators is an art, they often become prisoners of war, just like other slaves.”
“So you buy them, train them and put them in fights,” you looked at the gladiator without turning your head. "What is the return on investment of this strategy? Is this the best way to gain the trust of the emperors, by providing entertainment?”
Macrinus laughed. “My lady, you have the right angle, but I don't think you see the whole picture. Perhaps you could save your thinking skills for the council, as it is almost time. My slaves will be ready to dress you properly," he said, rising to his feet. "If I may ask, as you still haven't given me the letter."
One of the girl slaves came as you stood up. “The general has the letter, I'm sure he will bring it before the council.”
“I must say, I am rather surprised at the extent of your trust in him.” Macrinus narrowed his eyes.
“I trust him more than anyone,” you said confidently. You couldn't bear to hear him speak unfairly of the General. You took a step back, looking around to avoid making eye contact with him. “Now, where do I get dressed?”
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Roman Forum…
The Roman Forum was the centre of day-to-day life in Rome: the site of triumphal processions and elections; the venue for public speeches, criminal trials and gladiatorial matches; and the nucleus of commercial affairs. Here statues and monuments commemorated the city's leaders. This was where the Senate—as well as Republican government itself—began. The Senate House, government offices, tribunals, temples, memorials and statues gradually cluttering the area.
By the time the carriage carrying you and Macrinus arrived, the morning sun was already brightening the streets. The streets were now filled with Romans, spread around, going about their daily routines. This particular street was noticeably more crowded than usual. A considerable number of people had gathered in anticipation of the emperors' attendance at today's significant meeting. Among them were individuals with pending court cases, spectators eager to witness the new gladiators' initial contests, distinguished patricians and their wives, and those in need, who had come with the hope of receiving alms from them. Additionally, there were individuals who were to be dedicated as priestesses to the temple of Vesta and their companions, as well as those with business at the state house and, of course, the esteemed members of the senate and their wives.
Women were allowed to walk around the Roman Forum, but not in the Curia Julia, the senate building. Of course, the empress managed to sneak herself in - to see what was being said behind her sons' backs and what plans were being made - so it was inevitable that no one would pretend to know about it.
Today, Julia Domna managed to get herself into the Curia in the same way, but you couldn't see it because the entrance was too far away. Macrinus got out of the carriage and looked in towards you.
‘My lady, you will have to sit here for a while, you know women are-.’
‘Yes, sir, I know.’
He turned his head and squinted at something in the distance.
‘Acacius,’ he murmured.
Upon hearing his name, your heart began to race with excitement. He was the only person you desired to see at that moment. Macrinus took a step back, and the general's footsteps could be heard just outside the carriage.
"Did you bring the letter, General Acacius?" Macrinus asked.
You stuck your head out, eager to see his face. Cato was beside him, he took your letter out of his leather bag and handed it to Acacius, he handed it to you. You reached for it, and he turned his head to meet your eyes, making you realise how much you had missed him, even in such a short time.
“My Lady, I would like to return this to you.” The General was dressed differently today, in a toga worn on formal occasions. White in colour, it covered almost his entire body, with burgundy stripes around the edges. The shawl was of the same colour and pattern, the sleeves were short so you could see the thick gold bracelets on his arms, it looked perfect and neat.
“I am grateful to you for ensuring its safety,” you said quietly.
Macrinus cleared his throat. "Perhaps we should go inside now to start the session."
“Sir Macrinus, you go first.” Acacius said in a detached manner, his eyes locked on you.
“My lady,” he bowed his head, turned around and made his way towards the wide stairs of the Curia.
"Are you feeling a bit nervous?” His voice softened for you.
“A little,” you lied.
He smiled and put his hand on your cheek. “No need to be, you have nothing to worry about. It's your birthright, like every Roman. I think that's the only thing Macrinus and I agree on.”
You touched his hand on your cheek and gave it a gentle squeeze. “I know, thank you.”
He tilted his head towards you, almost close enough to touch you with his lips. “I will always be there to protect you, my beautiful lady, no matter what the outcome.” He held your eyes captive for a moment with his eyes, then pulled himself back. He looked ahead, frowning.
“They're here,” he said, squinting.
“Our Emperors!” Someone in the crowd shouted at the top of his lungs.
Your swallowed, feeling your heart began to race. Acacius stroked your hair gently, "There's no need to be so distressed. They can't do anything to you. There are very few people in the Senate who likes them. As much as I don't like him, I have to hand it to him, Macrinus knows what he's doing, almost succeeded in convincing the entire council,’ he said. 'I must go in now, Octavius will accompany you in,' he said, kissing your hand for the last time before leaving. You inhaled deeply while holding the letter in your hand tightly, praying to all the Gods.
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Curia Julia…
All councillors were present and awaiting the commencement of the session, with the oldest councillor taking the lead in opening the meeting. The murmurs of the members of the Senate reverberated gently off the walls of the Curia's spacious, high-ceilinged meeting hall. When their names were announced a little later, all the congressmen stood up and showed their greeting as the Emperors entered the hall from the great hall, albeit somewhat reluctantly. They took their seats in the western corner of the round hall, their attire differing from that of the members of the senate in that it was rather more ostentatious and therefore perhaps less appropriate.
The longest-serving member of the council approached the emperors and stood on the ledge in the centre of the hall to offer them his greetings. He surveyed the room with a gesture that seemed to convey a desire to embrace everyone. “What an auspicious day. Many gave their lives so that we could stand here once more, for the sake of an empire, a government with laws.”
All the members applauded him, except the emperors, who seemed bored already. Acacius was in the lowest tribune and sat quite close to them. Many were surprised to see him at the meeting today; he rarely attended, and no one even knew he voted in the elections.
“In honouring them, I would like to mention that we must pay our respects in your presence to General Marcus Acacius, commander of the southern armies, General of the Six Legions and protector of Rome.” he said, raising his hand and pointing to him. “He demonstrated remarkable courage in defending the Rome and is worthy of our respect and gratitude.”
The members started clapping more enthusiastically. They were all chanting the General's name together. Acacius stood up to show his appreciation and then sat back down.
“Senate is now in session. I invite Sir Macrinus here to make his speech.”
As oldest member approached the tribune to take his seat, Macrinus rose from his seat, came to the centre and greeted the emperors and members.
“Your Majesties, esteemed council members. The reason we are gathered here today is not a matter of government or politics. It is a matter concerning our former emperor, Emperor Septimius Severus and his family.” As he extended his hand towards Emperors, Geta turned curiously to Caracalla.
“What is he saying, brother?” he whispered.
Caracalla answered without looking at him. “Patience brother, you’ll understand soon enough.”
“So you knew?”
He did not answer, which made Geta angry and curious.
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By the time Octavius came to get you from the carriage, you were pretty bored sitting inside.
“My lady, it's time.”
You nodded and got out of the carriage with his help, taking a quick look around as you walked together through the crowd. The gladiator fights had taken a break, and people were discussing what was happening in the Curia. One of the trials was underway. A man and a woman were crying, as if they had been convicted of some crime you didn't understand. As you made your way up the stairs of the Curia, one after the other behind Octavius, one of the guards at the entrance blocked your path with an outstretched hand. Octavius brushed his arm away with the back of his hand.
"She is no ordinary woman, and the council members are waiting for her."
"Forgive me," he said, stepping back to allow you to pass.
You and Octavius entered a large hall and proceeded between tall, imposing white pillars. After a short while, you heard the voices of several men. Was there a disagreement in the council? Octavius stood near two large, thick pillars and looked in the direction of the sound, raising his hand towards you. "Perhaps we should wait a moment."
As the big iron door swung open, you could hear the voices inside a bit better.
"Are you saying that our sister is alive?"
It was Geta's voice, sounding angry. "Where has she been all this time?"
"As I said, Your Majesty, your sister was sent to Egypt on your father's orders. She wasn't there when I went to find her, but she is here now. Your sister is waiting outside with the letter your father, the Emperor, wrote to her. Shall I bring her here now?"
Macrinus' voice was loud but persuasive.
“Yes, the council wants to see her!” Someone else's voice was louder than his.
The voices that rose and echoed in the great hall were positive, a flicker of nervousness swept through you. Soon, Macrinus appeared in the doorway.
“My lady, remove your cloak, please.”
You did as he said, Octavius held it for you, and you felt a little reassured that he was there.
Macrinus accompanied you into the meeting room, his demeanor somewhat less reassuring than you had hoped. “Walk with a little more confidence, my lady, you will soon be declared 'filia regis’ (princess).”
His confident face was only working in his favor. It had nothing to do with you. You were trying to look ahead as you descended the stairs one by one, the councillors began to murmur, you didn't feel ready to look at them, and soon you heard Caracalla's hysterical laughter, you were startled and looked in the direction of the sound.
He pointed his finger at you. “You! It must be a lame joke!”
Geta was silent, only his eyes locked on you, leaning forward and marveling under his eyebrows. Caracalla stormed out of his seat and came over to Macrinus.
“What does this mean?”
“You told me my sister was coming, but you forgot to tell me who she was?” he scolded him in a low voice.
“It's pure coincidence that you've met her before, Highness.”
He then looked in the direction where the general was sitting, and you had the opportunity to observe him and the others. All the members were dressed in white togas, similar to the general, but with black embroidery around the edges of their clothes. It was a large hall filled with men, and it was somewhat awkward and uncomfortable to be in the middle of them as the only woman.
"She resembles her mother," one individual posited.
“Indeed, she is an exact match, both physically and genetically," another concurred. “Just like in the records.”
A multitude of voices were present, yet your attention was directed towards Caracalla, who directed a finger at the general.
"For how long have you been aware of this, General Acacius?”
“He didn’t know!”
As your voice echoed through the vast hall with a ringing effect among all the male voices, the other voices gradually faded and Caracalla turned to look at you. Then you handed him the letter.
“I got the chance to open it on the day of the ceremony. That's when I found out everything. General Acacius had no idea.”
This time you said it looking at all the council members as your eyes met Acacius. He was staring at Caracalla, looking a bit angry. Geta arose from his seat and approached Caracalla. He took the letter from his hand and read it over, then looked at you.
“Why didn't you say anything that day?”
"I was planning to," you replied. "I was uncertain of your reaction and what you would do," your eyes shifted to Caracalla. Another councillor approached and examined the letter.
“This is the seal of Emperor Septimius Severus,” he said, looking at the other members. Caracalla grasped the letter and held it up. “But a broken seal and a piece of paper which doesn't prove anything.” Geta reached out to take it from him, but he pushed him away with his elbow, tore the letter into pieces and threw it on the floor.
You were filled with anger. "That was the last thing left of my father," your voice was higher than you would have cared to have it be.
Macrinus interjected, "Your Majesty, while I understand your concerns, I believe it would be beneficial to hear the rest of the speech before making a decision.”
“I want to hear it.” Geta sat back in his seat.
Caracalla nodded and reluctantly joined him.
You clenched your fists, looking at the pieces of the letter on the floor, some of them scattered on your sandals. It was hard not to cry, your father's seal lying on the ground like something worthless. How could he be so cruel?
"Sir Macrinus, if I might be so bold, I would like to say a few words before you speak," said the oldest member of the council.
As he stood up and came to stand beside you, the room fell silent. "I was fortunate to have the opportunity to meet Lady Aurelia before she disappeared," he said, looking at you. "Her eyes and hair are similar, and her face has retained a remarkable resemblance. The emperor Septimius affectionately titled to her as 'Aurelia' due to her blonde hair. I am the one who made it official, and I have my signature and seal included in the record book. It is an honor to see you again, Lady Aurelia.” He bowed his head.
"I am truly grateful for your kind assistance, sir.” Your voice broke.
The crowd began to murmur again, with only a few objecting. The general was looking at you with a soft expression, and you smiled back, though you quickly turned your head away to avoid being noticed. Macrinus thanked the elderly member, waited for him to take his seat, and then he turned to the council members.
"I was fortunate to be able to visit Egypt four years ago at the Emperor's request. I went in search of the lady Aurealia, who was residing with Vicius, Septimius' personal medicus. I had a brief encounter with her, but it seemed that she was still unaware of the truth about herself. Vicius was of the opinion that the Emperor had not sent me. Perhaps he considered himself to be more closely aligned with the Emperor than I was. I am still curious as to what the Emperor may have promised him,” he said sarcastically.
“He did a good job of hiding her,” Caracalla said, teasingly.
The crowd found his behaviour amusing and laughter echoed through the great hall. Geta joined in with the laughter. The mood in the hall started to lighten, but you frowned. It wasn't right to disrespect his memory.
“Sir Macrinus, you mentioned seeing the lady Aurelia around four years ago, which is around the time we lost Septimius Severus.” One of the councillors said.
“I know what you're implying, but I've always had the trust of our emperors since they ascended to the throne. I couldn't bring your sister because I returned here as soon as I heard the news of Septimius Severus' death.” He said, looking at him and then back to the emperors. “He gave me a task before he died and told me to get it done. But I'm not the only one. There's someone else he assigned. With your permission, I call consul ordinarius Gaius Septimius Severus Aper here.”
Once more, the great hall was filled with murmuring. Macrinus  turned  towards you. “Your cousin,” he explained. You raised your eyebrows in surprise.
“I hate him,” Caracalla growled. Geta didn't seem to like him either.
A moment later, Gaius entered the great hall with another letter in his hand, greeted everyone and came over to you. He appeared to be in his thirties, well built but not soldierly, with an attractive but stern face.
“Lady Aurelia, we meet at last,” he said, smiling at you. You nodded, but didn't have anything to say, and were pretty surprised.
“Another letter?” Geta enquired.
“It seems our father has written letters to everyone but us,” Caracalla said, making a face.
They stood up and gave their cousins the kind of hug that was pretty clearly insincere. It was obvious that they didn't get along. Gaius held the letter up for everyone to see.
“I was with my uncle when he wrote this letter, he sealed it in my presence.” Gaius said.
“Before or after you fled to Leptis Magna?” Caracalla asked. Geta burst out laughing.
He ignored them and spoke to the council instead. "Members of the Senate, I break the seal in your presence," he said, and broke the seal of the letter that the father had sealed himself and opened it.
Macrinus asked permission to take the letter and summarised it for the council members.
“It seems that our Emperor has directed Gaius to ensure that upon the eventual return of Lady Aurelia, she will be duly restored to her full birth rights. That makes two of us sir Gaius.” Macrinus and him exchanged looks that made you sure they talked about his before.
“I am privileged to be able to convey greetings from your relatives in Leptis Magna to you. The entire Severan Dynasty salutes you, my lady,” Gaius said, bowing to you. “And of course you, our emperors,” he bowed to them, as a reply Caracalla turned his head in disgust.
Oldest member of council came towards you again with few members beside him.
‘Then, before our emperors and your esteemed councillors, I extend an invitation to all to welcome our filia regis princess Septimia Aurelia Marciana, first of the name, daughter of Emperor Caesar Lucius Septimius Severus Pertinax Augustus and his first wife Paccia Marciana, patroness of Leptis Magna back to her home.” He sang out.
"A very warm welcome back to Lady Aurelia!" someone stood up and said in a cheerful voice.“Welcome back, filia regis Aurelia!” another joined him.
And all the council members repeated in unison.
Geta approached you in a cheerful manner, clapping his hands. “Welcome, I embrace you as my sister," he said, kissing you on the cheek. You were somewhat startled, but you kept your composure, your cheeks blushed. "We must celebrate this," Caracalla said, kissing you on the other cheek, smiling involuntarily. You forced a smile in return, although he still made you feel somewhat nervous.
“My brother is right, we must celebrate!”
All the members were now standing and applauding, their enthusiasm evident in the resounding applause that echoed through the great hall.
"Sir Macrinus, bring the new gladiators to the Domus Severiana tomorrow. I want new games!" Caracalla smiled with joy.
"As you wish, your majesty," he bowed his head.
"But brother, tomorrow is the festival of Saturnalia," Geta whined.
“Well? That's better, it'll add some excitement.”
While they were chatting, you scanned the room, looking for the General among all the men.
Caracalla turned to you. “As our sister, you're supposed to come with us now?”
This was something you hadn't planned. You didn't factor in the idea of living under the same roof with them. Why didn't you think of that before?
Geta stood between you and Caracalla. “Mother must be pretty shaken up, perhaps you could go and find her first, I'll accompany Aurelia, she's a bit wary of you,” he grinned at you and took your arm.
Caracalla smirked. “Fine by me.” But you could tell he was watching you two.
'Come on, sister, there's lots to do.' You were a little surprised by how fast they welcomed you, but you feel grateful somehow.
The council members were all standing and chatting, and although you wanted to go to the general in this crowd and talk to him, you had to put it out of your mind for now. Before Geta pulled you along by the arm and led you out, you looked back at Marcus for the last time and saw that he looked worried. As you descended the stairs of the Curia with Geta, cheers and applause erupted from the crowd outside.
“Emperor Geta!”
Guards surrounded you to protect you, the crowd chanting Geta's name with enthusiasm.
Geta raised his hands high and greeted them. Then he grabbed you by the wrist and raised your arm.
"People of Rome, allow me to introduce you to your filia regis, Lady Aurelia!"
You didn't expect it to happen so soon. The crowd fell silent. Caracalla came running up behind him and grabbed Geta's other arm.“Eager much, brother? We must announce at the festival tomorrow.”
After a brief period of murmuring, the crowd suddenly began clapping and shouting again. You were taken aback when Julia took your other arm. How long had she been there?
"I would like to invite you all to welcome Lady Aurelia!" she sang.
"Welcome Lady Aurelia!" someone shouted loudly and cheerfully.
“Lady Aurelia!”
Just like in the hall, the streets of the Roman Forum began to echo with your name. It was a strange feeling, a bit frightening, exciting, and proud. You weren't used to any of it, but you were born that way, a princess. It will take me a while to get used to it, you thought.
“See? They love her already,” Geta winked at Caracalla, then pushed back the hair that had fallen over your shoulder. “Smile, sister.”
For him it was easy to say, for you it was all so sudden and you would have to adjust to this new situation. As the crowd chanted your names, the general, who had been observing the proceedings from a distance, seemed somewhat displeased that Geta had managed to touch you with such ease.
He hated to see another man touches you, even if it was your half-brother.
"General Acacius, it's been a long time," Gaius came up to him.
"Sir Gaius," the general nodded. "You are correct, I had just been appointed commander of the southern armies when I arrived at Leptis Magna. It must be decades." His eyes were watching you from afar.
"I must say that you played a significant role in the success of the battle there," he said. "I believe our people are still grateful to you." He was also observing you and Geta.
"I believe you stayed there to hide the emperor's letter. I understand why you chose to stay away from the capital," the general's eyes shifted to Caracalla.
"I believe he may view me as a potential threat to the throne, as he has done in the past. However, I believe it is my duty to remain here and complete my mission," he said with conviction.
The general observed Gaius' gaze and perceived that he was focusing it on you.
"I must ensure the safety of Lady Aurelia."
"But perhaps it would be wise to ensure your own safety as well? I believe you may be in more danger than she is.”
Gaius picked up on the hint in his voice. "Sir Macrinus told me a little about your relationship with her. I'm really grateful that you protected her while I was away."
The general stayed silent and waited, obviously sensing Gaius' intentions with his man instincts.
"I'll ask the emperors for her hand in marriage. I'm sure she'll be safer in Leptis Magna. She can't be happy with them – look how uneasy she is with them.”
The general looked tense. "I wasn't aware you were a widow," he said.
"Yes, I got divorced a while ago," he replied with a smile. "I would like to remarry, as a widow, you know what I mean, I guess."
Acacius returned his smile with a disgusted expression. "Could Iask why you believe Lady Aurelia will marry you? I am merely cautioning you in advance, Sir Gaius, because I am convinced that you will be rejected." He smiled wryly at him, then turned his back on him and began to ascend the stairs.
Macrinus approached him as Gaius glared angrily after him." You were right – there is something between those two."
"Don't worry, tomorrow at the festival we'll take the first step to get rid of Acacius once and for all."
Gaius turned to him, looking angry. "How can that be? He's someone everyone respects. He's the biggest obstacle in my way."
He touched his shoulder. ”The gladiators are ready to fight, we just need Majesties’ approval tomorrow. Then Acacius will find himself in the Colosseum, and then we'll get rid of him for good. Then there will be nothing in our way, my friend." He smiled confidently.
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Palatine Hill…
As the morning sun shone on the crimson-red roofs of the Domus Severiana, the birds chirped cheerfully and flew around, their songs of joy filling the air. Yesterday was a turning point for you. Things moved pretty quickly, and it was a bit of a challenge to adjust. When you first arrived with your half-brothers last evening, it was a lot easier than you thought it would be. Julia, their mother, was pretty quiet all night, but she didn't react badly to you, which surprised you even more. e. You got the feeling that she could be pretty ruthless, even though she seemed pretty calm. The idea of living in the same house with them wasn't appealing to you. In fact, it made you feel uneasy. Geta was the only one who didn't make you nervous, but you knew he was unpredictable like his mother.
You opened your eyes in your new room and bed, looked around, and closed them again. This room was big and luxurious, much more so than your room in the general's villa. A bit too much, you thought. You pulled the silk bed sheet over your head and sighed deeply. You would give anything to open your eyes to the new day lying next to Marcus, in his arms.
You were no longer a slave, nor a Medicus, nor could you go to his villa as a commoner. It seems that even as a princess, you don't always get to choose. But you missed him so much, his strong arms around you, his sensual lips, all the memories you had in his villa.
A gentle knock at the door momentarily distracted you from your thoughts, which seemed to fade into the elegant surroundings of this splendid room.
"Please come in," you said, sitting up in bed.
A young slave girl entered the room.
"My lady, I am pleased to see you are awake," she said, her voice conveying a sense of concern.
"Is there something wrong?"
"Yes, it's about Emperor Geta."
You removed the bedclothes around you and got out of the large bed.
“What happened to him?”
“He asked me to take you to him quietly, he doesn't want the Empress to hear.”
‘Hear what?’
‘He seems a little unwell.’
‘Take me to him,’ you said quickly. You were concerned that the poison might still be present in his body.
You left your room and went into the main hall to leave your chamber. Your room was in the east corner of the other courtyard. They said, it was your mother and father’s chambers when they first married. You strode up the stairs and entered Geta's chambers. It was still early, so the room was quiet. The other slaves looked at you with concern as you approached the door of the room where you had come to heal him the last time. They greeted you and opened the door for you. You were surprised to see a couple of young slaves lying on the floor. Their bodies were naked, which made you blush with shame. It was clear that your brother Geta had a lot of fun last night. There were two girls in Geta's bed, but he was nowhere to be seen. You looked at the latrina (bathroom, toilet) door and heard a coughing sound behind. He should have been there, but you had no intention of finding him naked.
You cleared your throat and called out to him.
“Highness? Geta? Brother?”
There was a brief interlude of laughter, and then he looked up at you through the latrine door.
“I need to get used to this, a woman's voice calling me brother.”
His face was as white as marble.
"Is everything all right? You look a little pale.”
“It's because I started the damn day throwing up.”
You looked down at the wine glasses on the floor and sighed.
"You must have had a lot to drink. You're just recovered, so you need to be careful about alcohol.” As you approached the latrine door, he was coming out, you almost bumped into each other. You quickly backed away and turned around, it was a bit stuffy in there, you moved to open the big window.
Geta looked like a little boy, messy hair and all, far away from an emperor.
"Do you think it's because I didn't drink your herbal thing?" He threw himself into the armchair by the window, covered his face with his arm.
“You didn’t?" You looked at him in shock. “How could you not? You had to drink it all to get better.” You were angry.
“But it tasted like cow dung.” He whined, lifted his arm up, gave you a mocking look. “What, are you scolding me?”
You swallowed. “Your Majesty,” you said suggestively. “You must drink the concoction for your own health.”
“I can't.”
You crossed your arms. “Don't you want to get better?”
“Because of that stupid whore, she broke the bottle. That's what happens when you bring a whore from the whorehouse.”
When you heard that word, you thought of Decima. You faced the fact that you had left her behind while you were dealing with everything.
“Could you make the mixture again? It's a festival day and I want to feel good, I don't want to look unwell especially when I’m with Caracalla.” He mumbled.
“I will, but may I ask something in return?”
“Aha! You don't act like a saint anymore, huh?” He laughed. You ignored his joke, approached him.
“Please, brother, a small favor?” Perhaps it seemed to you that you were looking at him in a pleading way. But to him, it was seductive, though he didn't show that. He cleared his throat.
“Alright, what can I do for my lovely sister? What is it you want, I really wonder?”
You smiled hesitantly. “A platoon of soldiers.”
Geta opened his eyes wide, let out a hearty laugh, stood up, and then laughed again, clapping his hands. You tried to stay calm and wait patiently.
He laughed so hard that the slaves on the floor and the ones in his bed all woke up and quickly left the room.
“You know, you really are an unbelievable woman.” His childish smile spread all over his face. He let out another laugh. Then he crossed his arms. “What are you planning to do with all those soldiers? I am genuinely curious.”
“I'm going to save my friend.”
He put his hand on his chin, thinking, narrowing his eyes.
“Why don't you ask the General Acacius for help? He can do alone what a platoon of soldiers can do.”
“Because he won't like what I'm going to do,” you were sure of it.The mere thought of it made you nervous, so you had to get it done as soon as possible.
Geta laughed again. “Something Acacius wouldn't like, hmm, sounds delicious. The soldiers are at your service, sister.”
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Whore House…
In the early morning, the street where the whorehouse was located was not very crowded, even quiet. Compared to other parts of the city, it might have been the quietest place in the mornings, but not today. You had come to this street with a group of ten soldiers with a single purpose. And this time you had the power to do it. Not as Aya, but as Princess Aurelia.
Walking with confidence among the soldiers, not paying attention to the people looking at you. You paused in front of the door, and the soldiers stopped with you. You'd already told the commander what was going to happen. He nodded and kicked the door open. The soldiers scattered inside to make sure you got in safely, the last two entering with you, standing next to you, protecting you.
Juturna, the woman who owned this place, looked like she had just woken up. She was surprised to see the soldiers; her pupils were popping out of their sockets.
Then she saw you and pointed her finger at you.
“You! What the?”
The room where they were holding Decima was upstairs. You ignored Juturna's whine and headed for that room. The soldiers were waiting for you downstairs, and one of them came behind you to protect you. When you stepped in front of the room, you rushed inside. Decima was lying on the bed, her wrists still cuffed with chains. She looked a little weak and hardly looked at you. You were incredibly angry. You grabbed her chain and looked at the soldier.
“Uncuff her!”
The soldier nodded and grabbed the collar of one of the guards who had come after you.
“You heard the lady!”
The guard was frightened, he quickly uncuffed her, and Decima's bruised face lit up with a ray of hope. When she was free, she hugged you.
“Aya, but how?”
“Never mind now, let's get you out of here first.”
You grabbed her arm and led her out of the room. As you made your way downstairs, you heard Juturna's cries.
“Lady you can't do this!” she lunged towards you, but one of the soldiers pushed her back.
“Pay her compensation,” you ordered one of the soldiers. He handed her the pouch full of coins.
“This girl is now my slave, send the necessary papers to the Domus Severiana, and if you have any objections, try the Emperor Geta.”
She swallowed hard, knowing full well that she'd never want to contradict him. You smiled triumphantly as you and Decima walked out of there with the soldiers behind you. Then you stopped suddenly when you saw the general standing next to your carriage.
When did he come?
You led Decima inside the carriage and looked at him. He'd called the commander of the troops to him and was talking to him. He punched him on the chest, but not so hard. Was he scolding him?
As you approached him, the soldier was coming towards you, rubbing his chest where General had hit him.
“The General says we're done here, my lady, if you'll excuse me.” he bowed his head.
“The General is right, you can go,” you said, looking at General.
“You really do whatever you set your mind to, you are so stubborn, my lady.” He muttered.
“How do you know I was here?”
Acacius crossed his arms and squinted at you. “I am the General, remember? All the soldiers in this city are under my command.”
"I see. I understand why you might be upset with me for not asking for help. I thought you could stop me from coming here, so I asked Geta for help."
"I can see that you and your brother Geta are close. I believe he asked you for something in return?”
"I promised to make the herbal concoction to heal him."
"I'd like to hear the real answer."
He smiled, but his eyes were sharp. It was impossible to lie to those eyes.
"Perhaps I told him you wouldn't like it," you said, biting your lower lip.
“This is the answer I'm looking for.”
“I didn’t want you to upset, I’m sorry.”
“It's not something you should be sorry about,” he said, looking at the carriage behind you. “You did it for your friend, I understand.”
Her eyes softened, and he was smiling once more, which prompted you to return his smile.
“I miss you,” you said in a low tone.
"I miss you more, my lady. "There are memories of you all over the villa. Facing those memories makes me sorrowful." His brown eyes were warm. "I find I miss you more when I'm in my room. There are so many reminders of you there," he said, his lips curving in a mischievous smile. He leaned his head towards you, close to your ear. "Especially in my bed." You gasped as his warm breath hit your face, your heart racing.
You almost forgot you were in the middle of the street. You were ready to throw yourself into his arms. You pulled yourself together with his giggling, he must have been amused by your facial expression. You jokingly nudged his muscled arm with your elbow.
"You're pretty shameless, General. Seducing me right here in the middle of the street.”
“Apologies, my lady,” he said, laughing.
"Are you coming to the festival today?”
“Yes, I've been invited and I would like to take this opportunity to talk with the emperors.”
You heard the hint in his voice, but you didn't understand it. His grin made you even more curious. He never smiled when he talked about emperors, so this was weird.
‘What are you going to talk to them about, I wonder?’
Acacius held your hand and looked into your eyes. "If it pleases you, my lady, I will tell them I ask your hand in marriage."
You froze and opened your eyes wide, unsure if you had heard correctly. Acacius smiled and kissed your hand.
“You can give me your answer after the festival. You might want to head out now, as preparations are about to get underway.” He put his arm around you and pulled you towards the carriage.
You looked at him before getting in, “I'll be waiting for you there, Marcus.”
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halsinsnaturepocket · 4 months ago
Text
Yearning for a Taste
Summary: Halsin is in his tent minding his own business, trying to read a book, when he hears a couple of voices meeting up outside of his tent. It's Tav allowing Astarion to feed on her, but it becomes…more, as the two of them seem to be entangled in a passionate affair.
Halsin, obviously, hears the whole thing and is trying to be Normal about it.
CW: MDNI, explicit behavior, Voyeurism, finger-fucking, astarion feeding on Tav, teasing, edging
Wordcount: ~ 3k
Notes: I'm aware Halsin’s tent doesn't actually shut and it's like…an open-faced lean-to-style deal, but for the good of the smut, we're going to pretend his tent has flaps on it that he can pull down to give himself privacy.
As far as actual timing of the story, I'm picturing this early act 2, before finding Thaniel, and before going to moonrise.
an extra special thanks to @mothermoth92 for beta reading and letting me throw ideas around
read it on Ao3!
Halsin was lying in his tent, using a bedroll to prop himself up as he read one of the books Tav had managed to find during her travels. A book on mindflayer anatomy she had gotten from Omeluum – it was a fascinating read, and it gave him some further insights into the threat they were facing. His attention was so focused he almost didn’t hear the sounds of two people meeting up near his tent. Unfortunately for him, his hearing was rather keen, and the secluded clearing he had settled in at camp blocked out most of the noises from the adventurers he was traveling with, but not the sounds of anyone in the clearing.
“Gods you're such a little freak,” he heard one voice purr. “You're so good to me, sitting in my lap, letting me feed on you.” The praise was followed by the sound of lips smacking against skin followed by a soft moan – he would recognize those voices anywhere. 
“You taste like wine.”
“Is that a bad thing?” That was definitely Tav. Her soft melodic voice was unmistakable. 
“Not in the slightest.”
“Can you get drunk off of my blood?” She giggled.
“We can certainly find out together.”
Ah, a drunken meetup, Halsin mused. It reminded him of a more frivolous time in his youth. Hopefully Tav had the sense to drink plenty of water if she was drunk and being drunk from. 
“Did you want more, darling?” Astarion’s voice was silken, lined with hazy lust. “Or did you just want to be my little snack for the evening?”
“You’re sure you saw Halsin go towards the north of camp?” 
“Almost positive. There’s no light on in his tent either, he’s probably off meditating or whatever it is he gets up to.”
They were quiet for a moment. It was true, he had wandered to the north of camp earlier in the evening, but when he had seen Karlach sneaking Dammon into the abandoned house at the border of  their camp, he had returned to his tent to give them privacy. Besides, he had his research to attend to now that they were in the thick of the shadow curse, and quite honestly he was exhausted from trying to find a way through to Thaniel.
“I see you’re not wearing any underwear tonight…” Astarion murmured. 
Halsin squirmed against his bedroll, trying to ignore the sounds coming from just outside. Of all the people to have a liaison behind his tent…did it have to be these two? From the sounds of it, Astarion was drinking from her neck, his hands likely snaking beneath her clothes, pleasuring her…
“Nnnnf…Don't stop…” Her voice was barely a whisper, a near-silent plea. Not silent enough.
Halsin was desperately trying not to listen in. He had been pent up for so long, and the two of them had each tried a few times to bed him; it had taken everything in him not to give in. He feared indulging would make his mind wander far too much, and before he knew it, he would be seeking them out every night for further indulgences. He was more than glad they sought company with each other, but did it need to be right outside of his tent? 
There was a pause in their sounds, and he breathed a sigh of relief. Hopefully it wouldn’t last long. Hopefully he would just bite her and they would sneak off to one of their tents.
His hopes were futile as he heard a soft gasp escape from Tav. “Astarion—gods that feels so good.” 
“Breathe a bit deeper for me darling – that's it.” He heard Astarion coax. “Good girl, that's my good little treat. You're so nice and wet for me…” 
Halsin turned on his side, his back towards the sounds, trying to ignore the two of them, but it proved…difficult. Her stifled moans were stirring emotions he had been trying to suppress for far too long. Both Tav and Astarion had long since held his attention – maybe it was just the kindred feeling of being around two other elves, or maybe it was more. He didn't want to think about it. He had to stay focused on his goals. The shadow curse lurked right outside the edge of their camp. He couldn't entertain such frivolous thoughts of companionship—
A loud moan interrupted his thoughts. 
“Bite me again, Astarion.” 
“With pleasure.” He heard him murmur, followed by the sound of Tav hissing from the sting of being bit, only to be chased by another soft moan. 
“Gods, you taste so sweet when you're on the edge…come for me, darling. Come while I drain you dry.”
Halsin froze, recalling the sensation of Astarion’s fangs sinking into his own neck…it must feel amazing to be on the very edge of pure ecstasy and feel yourself shaking with the cold chill of life being drained—no. He shook his head as if to rattle the thoughts away. He turned his attention back to his book. 
Many curious scholars have noted the illithid's disdain for arcane magic— “aahh! Astarion!” —yet do not understand the reasons behind it. In traditional illithid circles— “right there!”
Yes, quite interesting, to find that illithids were weak to arcane magic. Many curious scholars— “fuck!” 
He had noted the tadpole he studied back in the grove had reacted to arcane magic when used on it— do not understand— He had read this same sentence at least four times now. 
He couldn’t avoid it any longer. His mind was wandering. The familiar sensation of arousal gripped at his senses as he felt his heartbeat quicken and his underwear grow tighter. If they kept this up for much longer he’d have to find a way to relieve the tension himself. It was difficult to control his wildshape when he was so…pent up. 
“Oh gods, fuck , Astarion!” He heard Tav cry. They weren't even trying to be quiet anymore. 
“Shhh… my love, you'll wake up the whole camp at this rate,” he said, a twinge of teasing laced with lust spilled from his voice. 
Halsin had always wondered what sounds Tav would make. He'd heard her laugh, cry…her sneeze, even. He savored the sound of her moving, of her humming to herself. Her battlecry, her happiness…they were all so beautiful. But the sounds of her ecstasy…he didn't realize they could sound so sweet. 
“Don't make me gag you, darling.” He heard her moans become muffled, as though a hand had come to cover her mouth…likely exactly what was happening. 
Halsin grit his teeth, picturing the image of Tav tied up his vines, a thin cloth gagging her. Then the idea of her entwined in the pale elf, one hand over her mouth while the other was plunging himself into her while a trickle of blood from his fangs ran down her neck…He couldn't help himself. A groan escaped from him like a growl from a hungry wolf. He quietly clapped a hand over his mouth, despite the sound coming from deep within his throat. Covering his mouth would do nothing. 
The sounds stopped. Utter silence. The silent eeriness from the shadow lands was not helping. 
“Shit—Astarion you said he wandered off to the north of camp, is Halsin IN HIS TENT?”  He heard Tav whisper angrily. They had heard him. Hopefully this would pass, and it would never be brought up again. 
“I—ugh, I don't know, Tav. I thought I saw him leave his tent. What does it matter anyway?…I'm sure he’s enjoying the show. If he was so inclined, he could join. Though, perhaps he’s deep in a trance.”
“Gods…damned it, Astarion—” 
“Should I stop?” 
“I–I’m so close…” she moaned. “Maybe he’s not…”
“Shall I invite the druid to join us?” He teased. “I’ve seen how you look at him. You can’t tell me you wouldn’t love to have him fucking you senseless.” 
“Astarion— hush… if he is in there I don’t…” she trailed off with another light groan. 
Halsin decided to risk himself—he moved as quietly as he could, crawling on all fours, inching his face closer to the opening in his tent to see if he could glimpse at the two of them. He knew he would regret it, he knew it might not be a good idea, they could easily find him out…there was the risk of him transforming if he got too excited. It felt wrong but if they were going to continue despite thinking he might be there…
“Well we better put on a show for him then, shouldn’t we?” 
Halsin managed to peek out of his tent…he watched Astarion silence Tav with a kiss. She was sitting up against him, her back against his chest. Her shirt was still on, but it was loose, her collar unlaced and pulled aside to allow access to her neck, which was smattered with a couple of oozing bite marks. Her head lolled on his shoulder as she leaned onto him. Astarion was sitting on a raised section of rock that jutted up from the ground, the staggered granite created just the right spot for him to sit upright against, his knees draped over the edge and feet flat on the ground. As far as Halsin could tell, he was still fully clothed, Tav’s bare legs draped over his knees, her weight fully resting against him. Her skirt was hiked all the way up to her waist, held back only by Astarion’s wrist as he splayed her wide open across his lap. He swore his heart was beating loud enough for them to hear it. Would it be wrong for him to give himself some relief? 
He abandoned all sense of guilt as he watched Astarion’s slender fingers disappearing into Tav’s wet, squelching folds. Fingers he wished were inside of him, flesh he wished he was sinking himself into. He wasn’t sure which he wanted more – he wanted both. Halsin was grateful the only piece of clothing he had to struggle with was his underwear, which came off easily enough. He brought himself to his knees and slid them down, leaning carefully against one of the sturdy posts holding his tent up. He cupped his throbbing cock gently and gave it a few light strokes. 
One of Tav’s hands grasped desperately at Astarion’s legs as she thrust into his hand motions, matching his pace, her other hand reached behind her to grab onto his hair while he closed his eyes and drank from her neck again. His expression was peaceful, satisfied, his long lashes contrasting against his ivory skin. Tav’s movements were hypnotic, her body moved like gentle waves at sea as she undulated with his hand movements. Astarion’s free hand moved from her neck and slid over the top of her shirt through the unlaced collar of her camp shirt, Halsin could see his hand moving over her breast beneath the shirt. He grit his teeth as he held back another groan. 
Halsin set a steady pace as he began to stroke himself to the sight of them. He wanted to know what Tav liked…was Astarion just rubbing her nipples? Pinching them? He wanted to see them for himself…he wanted to taste her soft buds and suck them gently between his teeth. He wanted to feel them hardening at his touch as she moaned softly in his ear. He wanted to see what shape nature had sculpted beneath those clothes, to see if her nipples were as pink and pretty as her lips. 
Astarion gently kissed Tav's neck, licking at the wounds he had given her, not letting a drop of her blood go to waste. 
“I can feel you clamping around me, are you going to be good and come for me again? Show that druid what he’s missing if he would just give you a chance…”
Halsin felt the raging beast within him surge at his consciousness and he had to bite his lip to suppress a growl. He wanted Tav so badly, if only she knew how many times he’d had to resist the urge to throw her over his shoulder and carry her off into a secluded glen and claim her body with his. Every fiber of his being itched to feel her soft skin grow sweaty and warm at his touch and to feel her writhing with pleasure beneath him. All he’d wanted since the moment he joined their camp was to have her. He couldn’t indulge…he was so close to his goals. He knew he was often obsessive, he didn’t want to lose focus and she would be his downfall but he craved her so desperately—
“I’m going to—yes…yes…!” She was breathless, her movements becoming erratic as Astarion’s hand moved faster, he adjusted his arm and reached further, diving in deeper.
Halsin matched his pace with theirs, his breath growing ragged. He reached around into one of his bags for some lubricating oils…no sense in denying himself at this point. 
“I bet his cock is nice and big... I’d love to watch him pounding into you, darling. Just picture it…him bending you over and fucking you into oblivion…”
He quietly uncorked the bottle and poured the oil over his hands and let out a relieved sigh as he stroked himself faster…faster…the oils soothing and warming his skin as his hand slid over himself. 
“And what would you be doing?” She said, her voice sounded like she was pleading.
He removed his hand from the tent post and sat back, closing his eyes as he sat in a more relaxed position so he could just focus on his pleasure. He shouldn’t continue to watch, but he could listen…he was so godsdamned close…
“Watching, of course. Unless he wants me on top of him…” 
Halsin let a gasp out as quietly as he could as he leaned himself back onto his other arm…gods he would give anything, anything, for that right now. 
Tav moaned again, louder this time, the sound came from deep in her chest. Her scent was heavier in the air. Halsin’s breathing became shakier as the smell of their combined arousal wafted into his tent. His cock was starting to leak at the thought of being sandwiched between the two of them, rutting into Tav while Astarion was buried deep inside of him. Or better still, being balls-deep in Astarion while he fucked Tav, his thrusts moving both of them—
“Oooh someone loves the idea of that…” Astarion crooned as he heard the unmistakable sounds of Tav reaching the apex of her pleasure, just as Halsin was starting to reach his. He yearned to see her skin flush and her body shaking as she lost control. Honestly he should punish them both for teasing him, for coming into his territory, for continuing to pleasure each other even knowing he might be a witness…
“It’s too much...Astarion…” She gasped. “It feels so good – ah! Fuck…fuck! Astarion!” Another series of loud moans…and then she nearly shrieked: “Fuck me…oh gods… Halsin!”
His orgasm hit him like a tidal wave at the sound of his name escaping from Tav’s lips. He doubled over on his knees, shaking uncontrollably; he had to bite down on his hand to keep from crying out as a hot stream of liquid pleasure escaped from his body, his abdomen twitching, his toes curling, gods damned it all, he wanted them. Badly. Halsin laid down on his back and stared at the ceiling of his tent, panting, spent…and yet still barely feeling satisfied, his cock twitched with his pulse as his heart continued to drum in his chest.
“Careful, darling, don’t stand too fast. What little blood you have left might not be in your legs right now.” Astarion crooned. They were silent for a moment until he heard a soft sucking noise and a pop…like Astarion had sucked on his fingers and pulled them out of his mouth dramatically. 
“You are delicious, my dear.” A pause. “Would you like a taste?”
Silvanus save him. He didn’t need to see them to know Tav was sucking on the fingers that had just been buried deep inside of her…sucking them…licking them…he couldn’t take much more of this. He could clearly imagine her lips caressing his cock, barely fitting her mouth around him...
“You’re teasing me…cheeky pet.” Astarion tutted.
“Aww, does the sad little vampire want more? I’ve already given you so much… you’ll have to ask nicely if you want anything else.” She said in a pouty voice he’d never heard her use before. “I should punish you for teasing me with my little crush on Halsin…”
Halsin knew she had some sort of affection for him…the way her cheeks would turn pink every time he spoke to her drove him mad, but to actually hear it aloud was damn near torturous. His cock twitched, the spark within him reigniting already. He was still so sensitive but nonetheless, he tried to satisfy himself again. He gently gripped his length and stroked slowly, taking long, deep breaths in as he tried to keep himself quiet.
“Please darling, there’s nothing little about your crush–ah!” Halsin could only assume she had managed to get into Astarion’s trousers, or had done something to tease him further like grabbing him, stroking his growing bulge through his tight little leather pants, the ones that hugged his ass just right. 
“Tav…how likely is it that Halsin is in there?” He groaned. “If he’s not in there…what's to say you and I have a little fun on his bedroll?” 
Halsin froze. He should put a stop to this. He should. What would be more embarrassing…them coming into his tent to see him pleasuring himself to them or him walking out of his tent right now? Perhaps they were joking. Surely they wouldn’t take it this far. Halsin quickly searched around for his underwear. He couldn’t find them, not without making noise. An invisibility potion, maybe…a scroll…anything. He wasn’t sure if he was more panicked or more angry that they would put him in this position. 
“Astarion… Gods, you’re so naughty.” She giggled. “We could get caught if he comes back…”
He contemplated turning into some manner of small creature and sneaking away…but alas he had used too much of his magic today. There was no way he could voluntarily focus on shifting right now, either. It didn't necessarily need to be embarassing... maybe he should embrace the moment. Maybe he deserved a night of passion, just one night wouldn't ruin him.
“We could get caught out here, too.”
“We could already be caught.” 
He heard footsteps approaching and the sound of Tav giggling and their lips smacking together growing closer. 
Halsin would just have to embrace the moment as it unfolded.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
There will be a part two, as soon as I decide how I want the next part to play out. but I pinky promise there will be one!!!!! I've already started writing it!!!
There is a possibility of me writing two endings. tbh, the direction I go might depend on what feedback I get, so let me know what you'd like to see happen :3
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morganas-pendragons · 2 months ago
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ease | celebrimbor
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honest to god, I got this concept in the shower and it would not leave me alone. the prompt was found in the depths of the celebrimbor x reader tag (disclaimer: I am not a Tolkien reader, but I did grow up watching the movies and have done some research into the Silmarillion as I've been watching ROP) and this was born.
I've just found out some of the fates of these characters and I kid you not... I have a full fledged idea for a Celebrimbor/OC fic if my brain keeps this up
set during s2 of ROP, light spoilers ahead
prompt is here / this reader is a half-elven female who is gifted with magic. like I said, I am new to writing for this verse, so please be gentle.
***
You don't remember much about how you ended up in Middle Earth. There are glimpses, sweet fragments of memories that surface every now and again, but that is simply all they are. Glimpses of a time that has long come and gone.
Glimpses of who you were gone with it, like the receding tides of the ocean drifting further and further away.
The one thing you do remember with astounding clarity is your arrival to Eregion. You remember the front gates and how tired you were, and more importantly, you remember Celebrimbor. His complete and utter astonishment at your arrival was puzzling.
You didn't figure out why until later.
"Forgive me, but my healer tells me you have difficulties with remembering where you came from," He's standing in front of you where you sit in the healer's chambers of Eregion. You're surprised that they even let you in. Maybe he took pity on you. "Your injuries are minimal given how long he believes you were out in such conditions. Given your physical attributes, I would say you are at least Elvish. That would explain some of this. Do you remember your name?"
You didn't. The only things you had to remind you of who you were was the cloak around your shoulders and the circlet in your hair. A fine thing, crafted from what Celebrimbor later told you was pure silver.
"No... no, I don't." You shake your head and wrap your arms tightly around yourself. He can't help but soften. You seem very lost. Celebrimbor is not one to take in lost souls, but there is something about you that draws in rapt fascination, and he is not willing to turn you away. "But you were kind enough to take me in. Why did you do that?"
"You are no threat upon us. Now come. Let me introduce you to the great kingdom of the Elven smiths."
He extended his arm to you hesitantly. You found yourself taking it, staring up at him through a curious gaze as he dove into the history of Eregion.
Weeks passed. You noticed the longer you were present in Eregion and in the forges that Celebrimbor was very particular about who was allowed to remain in his presence for long. There were his smiths, and his servants, but there were very few who were truly allowed to know him on a more intimate and vulnerable level.
You found yourself wondering why.
On a quieter day in Eregion's forges, you venture out of your room in search of Celebrimbor. Most of the staff is familiar with your presence by now. You've heard the whispers. They wonder how a forsaken Elf has managed to find her way into their King's good graces after such a short amount of time.
"Ah, I was wondering when you'd arrive. Come. I have something to show you." Celebrimbor greeted. You followed him around the edge of the forge to a table in the center of the room where a familiar silver circlet sat. Your eyes widened. You had been wondering where it went. "I was given enough moonstone from a recent discovery to restore your circlet and add a singular gem to the center. What do you think?"
Again the eyes and ears are drawn to the pair of you. You can feel their questions burning through the air: Why her? Why is she in his good graces? What does a forsaken elf have to give to the King of Eregion and the Master Smith?
"Might we have a moment in private?" You ask. There is no hesitation in his response. Celebrimbor dismisses his smiths, and in mere minutes, the two of you are alone. He seems perfectly content to be with you where no other eyes can see. "I don't understand. We've only just met, and I don't even know who I am, but here you are reforging and creating something so beautiful for a stranger," You pick up the circlet with delicate fingers, turning it over to gaze at the gem in the center. It's a very delicate design that incorporates much of the Elvish culture within it. "Why?"
There's a beat of silence that you interpret as apprehension. Answering this question requires a certain sense of vulnerability that he so often shies away from.
What he does instead surprises you.
''Because," Celebrimbor's voice drops to a whisper as he settles the delicate circlet in your hair, and you can't help but smile at how gentle it is. "You are.. different."
That's all he leaves you with. You're left to wonder what about you is different. What about you puts him so at ease.
***
You know something has changed when you start to have premonitions of a tall, regal Elvish man with blonde hair calling himself Annatar. You watch Celebrimbor look on in complete and utter fascination of the glory that stands within his Forge. They're talking about more rings. Rings for Dwarves and Men.
Rings just like the three Elvish ones you had helped name. You'd been privy to their creation and had overseen the preparations yourself with Halbrand. This Annatar... That is not Halbrand, and he is certainly not someone you'd trust.
Not after Galadriel's warning.
Celebrimbor had not told anyone outside of Galadriel, Elrond and The High King of your origins. What little the two of you could come up with about them. All the five of you are aware of is that you hold a great power with magic that brings the skill of healing and persuasion of any life form, and that you fell to Middle Earth within its vast oceans and found yourself destitute mere miles away from Eregion.
"It's almost like your coming was a sign."
Your visions turn out to be correct, much to your horror. Annatar calls himself Celebrimbor's partner and again urges the need for creation of more rings. It's suspicious. Part of you wonders why he is so insistent upon more rings when just the rings for the Elves has proven to be more then enough.
It saved them from having to leave Middle Earth.
After Annatar's brief disappearance, you find yourself lingering in your chambers with your circlet poised in your hands as you internally fight through all the evidence you have lingering in your head. Celebrimbor doesn't know what to make of it, and neither do you.
That turns out not to be your concern once you see him trudging past your bedroom, muttering to himself in Sindarin as he attempts to massage his shoulder with his hand.
"Celebrimbor?" You call, mindful to call quietly so that his smiths and the staff do not hear you. He always hears you. Always has, always will. "Are you alright?"
His aspect says one thing, but his eyes say another. "There is always tension that builds within the muscles and tendons of the body after working vigorously in the forge. I am just stiff. It is not a concern you need to bother yourself with-"
You raise a brow at his veiled attempt to console you. It doesn't work. Glancing over your shoulder, you quickly follow on his heels to his chambers where you slip inside just before he can shut the door.
He freezes. The two of you are alone. Properly alone.
"This is quite.." You falter in search of the right word. "If anyone knew I was in here, it would arouse suspicion. I can tell you're in pain. We both know that you cannot alleviate that on your own." You pause to interject, "Only if you truly want the help. I would be happy to serve."
Realization dawns in his eyes. Neither of you are properly aware of how close you really are to each other, much less the fact that your hand is pressed against his heart. It flutters under your touch.
He's nervous.
Your creased brow softens when Celebrimbor winces again at the turn of his head, and your eyes focus on his neck. "I am in a great amount of pain," He confesses quietly. It's quite a feat for him to be so willing to be vulnerable with you. Especially when you have yet to see him ask for help from anyone else, including Galadriel or Gil-Galad. "And I would be much appreciative of the help."
Celebrimbor would never admit it out loud, but something swelled within him at the sight of your smile as you rushed back to your chambers to gather the oils you had stored there. He had come to care for you a great deal. That was dangerous. There was too much at stake with his House and his past... A past that he would rather never speak aloud for fear of having to truly relive it.
"You'd be more at least if you lie down," You remark softly, laughing as his eyes snap open in alarm. "The oils only work with skin contact. Are you okay with that?"
It takes him a moment to realize what you're doing: You're both asking for his consent, and you're giving him the opportunity to say no. It's just another thing that draws him to you.
You turn away to grant Celebrimbor a modicum of privacy while you prepare yourself and the oils you brought. By the time you turn around, you nearly drop the vials. You should have assumed he'd have scars. That there would be old burns and far more muscle that he could hide under those robes.
The only piece of clothing he was wearing covered very little.
"Celebrimbor," You whisper. He cannot help the shiver that runs down his body when your fingers come into contact with his spine. It has been centuries since he had last allowed himself to be touched, and to be touched in such an intimate and positive way was foreign. "Are you in pain?"
You already know the answer to this question. He lays down on the bed and tucks his hands under his forehead. There's several moments of silence that pass before you hear him murmur, "I have been in pain for quite a long time, nin tinu. There has only been one thing that alleviates it."
The Sindarin that rolls off his tongue rings clear in your head. My star.
"What eases your pain, My Lord?"
Your oiled fingertips, doused in lavender oil, have just made contact with his shoulders when he answers: "You. It has been you from the moment you entered my gates, and it will be you for however long you remain here, if you wish to remain here in Eregion with me."
You mull over his words as your fingers travel his skin. You mark your touch with firm yet gentle presses against the valleys of his back, dragging your fingers across raised scars that arouse much curiosity within you. Celebrimbor melts into the bed beneath you as he allows himself to absorb a touch he had not realized he craved so deeply for an entire lifetime.
"You have introduced me to such a peace since I have been here. A peace that comes from being in the presence of people who truly care about you, of people who truly want the best for you. That's why you have not told anyone of my heritage. That is why you keep me so close to your side. To protect me." Feeling emboldened, you bend your head to lay a gentle kiss at the space between his shoulder blades. Your ministrations have had their desired effect, because the moment you dig your fingers into where he'd been trying to massage earlier, it elicits a low groan from his chest. "Never has this destitute elf felt such peace as I haven learning how to love from you. I would be honored and privileged to remain in Eregion with you."
He's thankful in that moment that his face is hidden. Celebrimbor grimaces as tears prick the back of his eyes, blurring the sight of the blankets beneath him. He'd never experienced something as trivial as being loved in such a gentle, genuine manner.
"Dorth... nev na nin."
Again it rang clear as day. You were realizing the longer that Celebrimbor spoke in the Sindarin tongue that you were most definitely familiar with it.
He's asking you to stay with him. Permanently.
"Roll onto your back," You whisper. He complies with ease, showing you a stunning shade of hazel in the eyes that look back at you. "I-"
It's right there on the tip of your tongue as fingers stained with lavender oil linger right at the hair on his temples. You know you've loved him for a while. It's not the hesitation in confession, it's in his response.
His lips part of their own accord as you bend your head to press your forehead against his own. You both want to kiss the other, and badly, but this act alone is intimate enough.
"Don't say it. Not yet." His breath fans over your face as he shudders, eyes flickering upward to meet yours through the hair that veils your face. "Just let me..."
Celebrimbor parts your hair to tuck it behind your ear and lifts his head just enough to graze his lips against yours. It's barely a kiss, more the ghost of a kiss then anything, but the way it puts your body at such ease speaks more then a real kiss could've.
You're laughing when you part. He doesn't know why. What Celebrimbor does know is that the stiffness in his muscles is gone, replaced by an inexplicable warmth he's never quite felt before.
The shade of your eyes has been illuminated by a silver the same color of the jewel in your circlet, which is now glowing from where it sits upon your head.
He'll have to question that later.
"Why are you laughing? It's quite inappropriate to laugh in such a circumstance-"
You press your fingers to his lips. Celebrimbor is blushing so hard you're sure that his cheeks will stay that color for the rest of the night.
"If you wanted to get unclothed in front of me to have me touch you, all you had to do was ask."
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spiderwcd · 10 months ago
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siren lake c.b.
pairing: colby brock x mermaid/siren ! f ! reader
summary: they come to explore the haunted lake, but maybe it wasn't just haunted.
warning(s): mentions of deaths, near drowning, profanity, near-death experiences mystical creatures, etc.
w.c.: 3.3k
a/n: guys, please don't hate me!! i've been away so long, ive been having writer's block and then i've been so busy with my life and having the worst luck ever (they weren't wrong about that fanfic writer curse) but trust me! i have a lot of works saved, slowly plowing through them.
images from pinterest !
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“Dude,” Sam abruptly jumped from his seat on the couch, carrying his laptop over to Colby. “Look at this.” He pointed the screen towards him, revealing his discovery.
Colby curiously averted his gaze over to the screen, reading the article that was pulled up. “W-What am I looking at here, Sam?” he inquired, raising a brow towards him.
“Well, someone sent me this article about this supposedly haunted lake,” Sam began, plopping himself next to Colby on the couch. “They say that these entities are haunting it, causing a bunch of disappearances.” He finally added.
Taking a moment, Colby glanced at the article, contemplating. “I mean, it’s worth a shot,” Colby muttered, facing towards his best friend.
In due time, they arrived in Michigan, the Land of the Lakes. Colby had been studying about this mysterious lake, finding holes in different stories. It was something unknown to him, unable to find an obvious answer here.
“Okay, so as we know,” Sam began, looking over at Colby from the driver’s seat. “This lake is in the middle of the forest, near some campsites.” Sam clarified.
Colby nodded, understanding his statement, “Don’t forget to mention the disappearances, also about the spirit that drowns first in the 80s.” He pointed out.
Sam nodded in return, pursing his lips as he attempted to dig further into his thoughts. “Oh, what about the mermaid theory?” Sam suddenly blurted out.
Colby scoffed, looking over at Sam with a slight grimace. “Seriously? Mermaids?” Colby murmured, flipping through his notebook. “I mean, sure, it’s a fun idea to entertain, but we both know that’s not real.”
“Oh hey, come on,” Sam nudged Colby, still steering the wheel of the car. “It’s nice to have an imagination here, Colby.” Sam chuckled, patting him on the shoulder before placing both hands on the wheel.
Colby shook his head, smiling as he studied the pages of research. He examined the illustration on the page, deep into toying with the idea. He shook his head once more, closing the page as he thought about the ridiculous idea.
The car came to a halt, prompting Colby to face upward to the scene. His jaw flew open in amazement, admiring the large forest surrounding them. The middle showcased a lake larger than he had envisioned.
“Woah,” Colby muttered, exiting the car to get a better view. “Did not expect it to be so gorgeous out here.”
“Even if this comes to a dead end, at least we’ll have a good time in the middle of the forest.” Sam joked.
“You must be Sam and Colby,” they had suddenly heard, causing them to avert their gaze over to the voice. “Hi, I’m Ben.” The man waved over towards the two.
The duo made their way towards their host, introducing each other.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” Ben had asked them.
“Oh yes,” Sam nodded, glancing around once again. “Very nice, exceeded our expectations.”
“That’s great,” Ben chuckled, leading the two towards the cabin that peered over the ominous lake. “Cause the two of you will be staying here, so get used to it.”
Sam and Colby glance at each other for a moment, following Ben towards the door. As they entered, they studied the room. It wasn’t one of their Airbnbs, but it was still nice, grateful for a roof and not a tent. 
Colby’s eyes slowly averted towards the window, as if an irresistible force was pulling him towards the lake. But swiftly pulled away at the pat on his shoulder, facing towards the grasp.
“Isn’t that right, Colby?” Sam asked him, confusing Colby. 
“Huh? Oh yeah, for sure.” Colby randomly replied, going along with Sam’s story. 
“Alright, I’ll let ya get to it then,” Ben sighed, making his way toward the entrance. “I’ll come back in the morning to check on y’all. Remember to check the list I left every night.” He pointed out. 
Once Ben had exited the campground, leaving the duo alone in the woods. Colby let out a breath as he planted himself onto one bed, rubbing his eyes slightly. 
“Well, what did you want to start with?” Sam asked, plopping next to him. “Did you want to do the intro or do more research?” 
Colby peaked from his hands, looking towards Sam. “Uh, let’s just figure out our intro and record that, followed by more research,” he answered. 
They didn’t waste any time, every minute counted for them. Considering the way the sun crept through the blinds and curtains, the time was very limited. Colby’s fingers started to cramp from the various writing and typing, along with the migraine sneaking in.
“That’s it,” Colby blurted, tossing the pencil down. “I think it’s time to throw the towel. I need a break.”
“Me too,” Sam sighed. “If I have to write one more thing, my head might explode.”
Colby dryly chuckled, planting himself onto his feet. “I’m just gonna go out onto the pier. I need some time alone.” 
He opened the door, letting the cool wind hit his face. He quickly closed the door, walking towards the wooden structure. Colby let out a groan as he crossed his legs, overlooking the large body of water. He ran his hand through his hair, attempting to relax as he listened to the soft music of the forest. 
But he lost his train of thought, a splash ringing out. Colby curiously raised his brow, searching for the source of the ripple of water. He focused in on one area, unable to take his eyes off. 
Colby soon got interrupted by a ringing from his pocket, pulling his eyes away from the lake. He picked himself off the wobbling planks, retrieving his phone. 
“Hello?” he answered, still glancing over towards the ominous lake. 
“Colby, get in here,” Sam waved over from the window, still on the line. “I found something.” 
Colby hung up the phone call, stuffing the phone back into his pocket. As he entered the cabin, Sam quickly dashed his way and shoved his laptop into Colby’s face. 
“Look.” Sam smugly grinned. 
Colby looked at his best friend before looking back towards the screen. 
‘Sirens in Michigan?’ 
“Sam,” Colby tried to protest, but Sam was persistent. 
“Listen, we hunt ghosts. How much different can this be?” Sam scoffed, attempting to change Colby’s mind. “Can you at least be open to the idea?” 
Colby looked at Sam with a blank look, crossing his arms. “Fine, we can be open to the idea, but I’m still skeptical about it all.”
The next day arrived, prompting the boys to prepare their video at last. Colby stood at the edge of the lake, awaiting Sam to finish setting up the camera. Sam gave Colby a thumbs up, signaling everything was ready. 
“Hey, what’s up guys!” Sam greeted. “It’s Sam and Colby, and we’re here at the Siren Lake in Michigan!” he panned the camera towards the lake and treeline. 
“We’re here to investigate the various spirits that might be roaming the lake,” Colby began explaining. “But also, as the name suggests, there might be more than just spirits here.” 
“That’s right guys,” Sam chimed in. “There are supposedly sirens, aka mermaids, in this very lake.” 
“If you ask me, I don’t think there’s such a thing,” Colby raised his hands in defense, causing Sam to shake his head. “Listen, ghosts and demons have a lot of proof and we’ve seen them, but mermaids?” Colby scoffed. 
“I think you’ll say differently later,” Sam smirked. “Cause one of us is gonna have to go onto the pier and talk to the said spirits or whatever roams that lake.” 
The two continued to talk, making their way around the lake for a bit. 
“Okay, so the history of this lake begins with a family, as most do,” Sam began. “The Bradson family had owned this lake from generations ago until the 80s.” 
“The only reason they had sold it off is because they used to run a camp here until odd drownings had appeared,” Colby added. “And all of them were all men.” 
“That doesn’t give us a lot of comfort, does it now?” Sam joked, nervously laughing into the camera. 
“Our guide and the owner of the campgrounds will be here in a moment to explain more in-depth,” Colby explained. “He knows more than we do.”
Just in time, a car pulled back onto the dirt road. Ben exited his car, greeting the boys once more. 
“Perfect timing,” Sam laughed. “We just began introducing you.” 
Ben chuckled, making his way towards the two, “Almost as if I was summoned here.” He joked. 
Sam turned on his camera, recording once more, “So actually, as we closed our camera, our guide just pulled in.” He chuckled, pointing it towards Ben. “Say hello to Ben.” He introduced
“Alright, Ben, we just want to know what you know,” Colby started, crossing his arms slightly. “Tell us your secrets.” 
“As you must already know, this used to be a campground until the 80s,” Ben began. “Do you know why they call it Siren Lake?” He asked the two.
Sam glanced over to Colby with a grin, causing Colby to roll his eyes. 
“Yeah, we might have an idea,” Sam answered. 
“Well, people started talking about how the victims were all men,” Ben pointed out. “A rumor started that they were ‘seduced’ over to the water and murdered by a siren.” 
“Really? Sirens?” Colby scoffed, laughing a bit. 
“Yep, since the lake connects to a river that leads to the ocean, they assumed that something supernatural might cause of this.” Ben chuckled at Colby’s reaction. 
“Can you tell Colby is a skeptic about mermaids?” Sam teased. 
“Oh, that’s alright, he won’t be by the end of the trip,” Ben replied. 
While heading to the pier, Ben entertained the group with tales of the profound history and personal experiences of different individuals.
“So tell us, have you seen the siren?” Sam asked curiously. 
Ben thought about it for a moment. “You know, I have,” he nodded. “I was letting a group of guys stay here for the night. I went to check on them and they were freaking out about their friend seeing something. So I went to check out the lake because I figured they saw something and freaked out. But when I stopped at the edge of the pier, I saw something peeking at me through the water.” 
“Woah, that’s so weird,” Sam muttered. “What did you do?” 
“Well, I thought it was someone playing some joke, so I yelled at them to get out of the water and it was private property.” Ben shrugged. “But they just stared at me for a second so I pointed my flashlight over, which made them go underwater and splash away, and I saw bluish silver scales on the biggest fish's tail I’ve ever seen.” 
Sam looked over to Colby, a smug look on his face as if he was saying ‘told you so’. 
“I’d be careful, boys,” Ben warned. “Even you, Colby, sirens are no joke. They will lure you and drown you. Just be careful.” 
“Thank you, Ben.” Sam thanked him, shaking his hand before letting him return to his daily work. 
Sam turned over to Colby, “I told you, what happened to having an open mind?” 
“I’m trying, but mermaids? It’s hard to wrap my head around.” Colby responded. “I already have enough of ghosts and demons.” 
Sam rolled his eyes at his best friend. “Okay, let’s just talk about the spirits. Surely you’ll keep an open mind about that.” He patted Colby on the back, pulling out the various equipment. 
Sam turned on the rem pod, placing it down onto the pier, followed by the Alice box.
“Alright guys, so we’re now gonna talk about the spirits,” Sam sighed. “There were about 3 guys that drowned. They weren’t even able to recover any of their bodies because of how deep this lake is.” 
“Yeah, so their bodies could still be down there,” Colby added, shivering at the thought of it. 
“There’ are a lot of theories about how these guys died, most of them saying they were drunk or under the influence. There’s also speculation that they died from how cold the water was, causing hypothermia, but of course, there’s the siren theory,” Sam stated. “Sirens, though, tend to just kill to kill. It’s said that it killed them because they were terrible guys.” 
“They were awful, apparently having a reputation of being sleazy and gross,” Colby added, having a grimace grow on his face at the idea. “But we’ll try to find out through the spirit box and maybe the Estes method.” 
“I think since I’m more open-minded, unlike my colleague,” Sam teased, pointing the camera towards Colby who shook his head. “I’m gonna be doing the Estes method.” 
They quickly turned on the devices in hand, thinking of questions. 
“Alright, Uh, is there anyone here?” Sam asked to the open, listening carefully as the crickets chirped and the night wind blew past them. 
“...you…”
“Who are you referring to?” Sam responded. 
“...water…” 
“Yep, there’s water here. Is this where you passed away?” Colby nodded, shifting his weight. 
“...rocks… drown…” 
Sam snapped his head towards Colby, a confused look painted on his face. “Woah,” he muttered. Colby agreed, looking back at the Alice box.
“Who are you? Are you one of three men that drowned here?” Sam added, biting his lip as he rubbed his chin with his finger. 
“...Mike…” 
Colby’s jaw dropped, facing the camera. "They're not gonna believe that, but one of the men who passed away was named Micheal Anderson," Colby said, his jaw dropping as he faced the camera.
“...unknown…cold…” 
Sam’s face contorted to one of confusion, looking at Colby for answers. “Maybe they’re saying they don’t remember how they died? I mean, the water gets freezing.”
Colby nodded, attempting to decipher the various words and their meanings. “Can you tell us what happened? Did you guys just die from the cold water or drown from drinking too much?”
“...none…strange…” 
“Huh, maybe the siren theory was right?” Sam nudged Colby. 
“Yeah right,” Colby sneered. “Maybe they died from something else.” 
“...careful…” 
“Look, it’s even trying to warn us,” Sam pointed out, but soon the familiar red light and blaring sound appeared from the rem pod, alerting the two. “Oh my god, that scared the fuck out of me,” Sam murmured, pointing the camera towards the flashing device. 
“Is that you Micheal? Or is someone else making that flash?” Colby asked, stepping away from the rem pod as the light continued to circle. 
“...pussy…” 
Colby blurted out in laughter, followed by Sam. “Wow, maybe they were jerks.” 
“I think maybe the Estes Method will give us a simple answer then,” Sam said, calming down from the fit of laughter. 
Colby turned off the spirit box, handing Sam the bandana followed by the headphones. Once he had put them on, Colby showed the camera that Sam couldn’t respond.
“Okay, so let’s begin,” Colby sighed. “Okay, can you give us a straightforward answer to what happened here? You guys are being very hush-hush about the answer.” 
“Pier,” Sam blurted out. “Something dangerous.” 
“Yeah, some can say drinking and swimming are dangerous,” Colby joked. “Can you clarify more?” 
“Beware of the woman,” Sam answered. 
Colby felt his heart drop, unable to comprehend what that could mean. “Uh, what woman?” 
“She calls for you,” Sam responded, confusion in his voice. “Watching you.” 
A shiver ran down Colby’s spine, goosebumps covering his skin. “W-Wha… Watching me?” Colby repeated, hearing the familiar splashing near the pier. 
Colby snapped his head up, his eyes attempting to adjust to the dark as the moonlight hit the ripples. Colby pointed his flashlight over to the deep gray water, searching for the source, just as he had done earlier in the day. 
Sam continued to speak, unknowing of his best friend’s search. Colby’s feet stopped at the edge of the pier, ignoring all the sounds in the background. He let out a sigh of relief, unable to find any evidence of anything going on. 
But as soon as Colby put down his flashlight, he felt large hands pressed up against his back. Colby, unable to retain his balance, fell into the deep cold waters, which had created a large splash that traveled to Sam. 
Sam tore the headphones and blindfold off his head, turning around to look at Colby as he floated to the top. 
“Woah, you alright, man?” Sam hurried to the edge, squatting down as he offered a hand to him. 
Colby let out a laugh, swimming towards the pier. “Someone fucking pushed me in.” He muttered, reaching for Sam’s grasp. 
He was about to grab Sam’s palm, but felt a tug at the end of his legs. “What the fuck, something grabbed-” 
Colby’s sentence soon cut off as he got pulled under the water. He kicked the unknown entity, gasping for air as he heard Sam’s voice muffle as he called out for him. 
Colby thrashed, adrenaline kicking in as he attempted to free himself. Colby looked down at the void of the lake, unable to find the source. Water filled his mouth, oxygen slowly escaping his body. His body sank, and the energy to fight slowed. 
Colby had accepted there wasn’t a way out of this doom, looking up as he slowly descended into the seemingly never-ending waters. His vision slowly distorted as he examined the murky waters above him. 
“Wow, I never realized it was a full moon tonight,” was all he could think about 
Just as he thought it was the end, he saw something move out of the corner of his eye. A figure slowly circled him as it made its way past the moonlit waters, a glow of bluish silver reflecting as its hair sprawled around it. 
Well, it wasn’t rather it; it was a woman. Colby wanted to react, but his body slowly shut down as his vision darkened. She was beautiful, her skin flawless and her long hair engulfing them as she touched his face as if she examined his features. 
Colby’s vision became dark, becoming unconscious. She doesn’t remember men being this flawless, gliding her fingers across his skin. His tattoos caught her eye, something odd about painting skin to her. A frown grew on her face, looking back up at the land above as blue and red lights danced around the surface of the water. 
She looked back at Colby, knowing the minutes were passing by. She quickly grabbed his arm, carrying his limp body up. Peeking over the water, she glanced around at the various people walking around. She bit her lip, brainstorming ideas. 
The mermaid decided it was best to leave him by the shore, where Sam was pacing and freaking out. She knows if she does this, who knows if her identity will be safe? But something against her nature knew this one thing: she did not want the beautiful man to perish. 
She drew him above the water, grunting as she pulled his seemingly lifeless body towards the wet rocks. She looked back at him, her brows furrowing as she fought within herself whether she did the right thing. Under the water once more, she dove, splashing as she vanished, making her way under the pier to observe the scene. 
It wasn’t long until many flashlights lit up the shore, revealing Colby’s drenched and pale body. Sam let out a cry, watching as his best friend coughed and gasped for air as the water exited his lungs. Sam embraced him, relief washing over him as he recovered from his accident. 
Colby sat at the edge of the patient compartment of the ambulance, wrapped in a towel, drowning out as the EMTs and various cops talked to Sam as he stared towards the lake. Something inside him was fighting whether he had made up the mysterious creature or, by some miracle, it was all true. 
Colby jumped as Sam’s hand landed on his shoulder. “Dude, what the hell happened? I thought you were gone. The cops said you were lucky to even make it out of that lake.” 
Colby looked up at Sam before glancing back at the body of water. “I think a mermaid just saved me.”
˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖
thank you guys for reading!
I'm sorry if it's short, Its just something I put together in one day. I do value your opinion, so please do tell me what you think!!
expect more stories soon!
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thedreamlessnights · 11 months ago
Text
Distraction
Gale x F!Reader - NSFW
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Summary: Gale is working in his study. You have half a mind to distract him.
Warnings: 18+ (and I cannot stress this enough). Established relationship, blowjob, oral sex (male receiving). Sappy Gale. Mystra hate. Takes place post-game and includes mild spoilers.
Word Count: 2.1k
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Gale Dekarios is easily distracted.
It’s something you’d noticed not long after meeting him: his long, informative tangents, excited bursts of information, trails of thought that faded away when he saw you. Anything that came to mind was bound to pull him away from the current time and setting.
Now, after knowing him as long as you have, you’re more than familiar with that tendency for distraction. It’s endearing, in fact. You don't like to be complacent, but you have noticed that his distraction always seems to be most prominent when he’s around you. His sharp wit dulls, and his clean train of thoughts turns into slips of the tongue.
Your mother had given you plenty of advice when you were young, but one strain sticks with you the most: that there is nothing more attractive than a man who wants you, and has no qualms with showing it.
Given your relationship with Gale, you’ll have to agree. Long after the two of you have settled into his tower in Waterdeep, it’s the thing you like to play with most. A stroke of your ego, perhaps, but you never grow tired seeing just how much Gale desires you. Physically, emotionally. Spiritually.
That want isn't always in your head, but it often plays through your thoughts, especially when Mystra comes to mind. How many different ways has he professed his love for you? Moreover, how many times has he internally not felt enough for you - and as the result of a goddess who used him then discarded him like he was nothing?
Time and time again, it’s the subject that irks you: that he has no idea how much you want him. You’re married, yet he still has no clue how much you mean to him. You can never say it enough. Lately, you’ve taken to trying to show him.
He’s never told you specifically, but you know that Mystra had made him feel unworthy, and that he still feels that way now and then. You can practically see the scars she’d left on him, written into his anxious words. Little by little, those scars are fading - but if you have anything to say about it, Gale will never feel unwanted again.
Which is what brings you to the study, looking for your husband. You find him sitting at his desk, scribbling away at a loose paper like he usually does. Something important, judging by the look of it.
His shoulders are scrunched together, his brows are pinched, and the back of his hand is black with smudged ink when he bats a stray strand of hair out of his eyes. It’s perhaps cruel to interrupt him, but something tells you he won’t mind.
You step further in, settling at his side and placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.
He gives you a smile when he sees you, some of his tension bleeding out of him. “My love,” he says brightly, taking your free hand in his. “I trust your day’s been well?”
“It’s been alright,” you say. Mostly, you’ve been missing him - he often coops himself down here for his research, and you and Tara are the only ones able to pull him away. You trail your fingers further down his arm, locking at the elbow, and his breath audibly hitches.
Oh, you think. You know very, very well what that means.
You lean in a little closer, giving him a soft smile. “What about yours?”
“Good,” he says, suddenly breathless. “Very good. Just wait until you see the research I’m doing. It’s astounding.”
You love listening to him talk. The way he delivers information is charming, to say the least. The way his eyes light up. The way his tangents can spin on for hours, and yet only seem like a few moments. The passion that tinges his voice, his gestures, his words. It’s one of your favorite things about him.
And yet.
You keep your eyes fixed on his as you lift his palm to your lips, and pink dusts over his cheeks. “By the weave,” he mutters, swallowing hard. “You’ll be the end of me - do you know that?”
His hand brushes over his papers, and you glance over at them - the ones he had just been so aptly working on before you interrupted.
You’ve known Gale enough to know the difference between work that’s important, and work that can wait. The eagerness in his eyes, the airiness to his voice, and the way his pupils dilate all spell out one thing: this work can wait.
You experimentally trail your fingers over his thigh. He squirms a little, his breath catching again. Warmth starts to simmer under your skin, and you can't help chasing after the feeling.
“Gods,” Gale murmurs, swallowing hard.
You lean in until your lips are next to his ear. The scent of him is warm and tempting on his skin: something woodsy and sharp, mixed with the smell of old books.
“I’ve missed you,” you tell him, moving your fingers just a little bit upward. Enough to have his breathing jagged and strained, but not high enough to be where you know he’d like them to be.
“If I wasn't working…” he says. And yet, he’s completely dropped his quill. His eyes are on you, not his papers.
Your mind forms a plan.
“By all means, don’t stop on my account,” you tease, nipping at his ear. When you pull away, his pupils are blown out - brown irises nearly drowned out by black - and his eyes only dilate further when you get on your knees in front of him.
For a moment, you simply sit, waiting for a protest. He gives none. In fact, when you start unlacing his trousers, he leans back, giving you more access to touch him.
The heaviness of his breath makes him impossible not to tease. Gale is always incredibly obvious in the things he wants, and you love to see the way he wants you. You want to hear it. Physical proof of it, tangible in the air.
“Go on,” you urge. “Keep working.”
Gale murmurs something under his breath, and your ears only catch the faintest breath of it: your name, said as a plea.
You start by taking him into your hand, belly fluttering at the sight of him. He’s already half-hard, silky and warm in your grip. He inhales sharply when you touch him and shudders when you stroke along his length, placing a kiss to his still-clothed thigh. You halt, and after a moment, you hear a curse. Then, what you’re listening for.
The scribble of his quill.
It halts ever so briefly when you trail your tongue along the head of his cock, teasing at the sensitive skin the way you know he likes. Then it resumes - albeit, erratically - and you take him further into your mouth.
The taste of him is subtle, but you know it like the back of your hand. Something salty, vaguely sweet. You moan around him, planting a hand on his thigh, and enjoy the way his hips unconsciously buck toward you.
He lets out a soft groan, and the quill pauses again. Are his hands shaking, you wonder? Are his sentences coherent? When this is all over, you’ll glance at his paper and find out. If you’ve ruined it enough, you might even keep it.
You want this to last, so your rhythm starts off slow. You want to please him. To pleasure him beyond belief. The goddess of magic may be his old lover, but can she hold a candle to your fervor? You doubt it.
With you I forget my goddess, he’d said. Just the memory of that has arousal simmering under your skin.
Once he’s writing at a normal pace again, you continue, drawing out the drag of your tongue along his length. Then you take him into your mouth once more, gently sucking down the shaft.
In response to your actions, Gale makes an assortment of sounds you’d like to bottle up and keep forever - a soft, seeking noise when you suck a little harder, a long groan when you take him down to the base. His quill is almost certainly shaking by now.
You pull away, and glance up at him - and gods, the sight of him. His cheeks flushed, his brows pinched in pleasure. His attempts to keep his breathing even, and his concentration somewhat on his paper. He’s clearly failing.
You’re suddenly all too aware of how clothed he is. How clothed you are. Arousal floods down your back, hot, wanting more. Wanting to take him back into your mouth and finish him.
Instead, you pull his shirt away from his abdomen and tug it up his torso. Kneeling, you aren’t able to pull it up very far. Gale, ever perceptive, finishes the job for you.
“It seems distracting me wasn’t enough?” he asks lightly, his tone teasing but airy. “Now you want me to remove my clothes as well?”
You let out a soft laugh and work the rest of his clothes off of him, admiring the view.
Gods, he’s handsome. Miles of warm skin under your touch. Soft, dark hair under your fingers. A shudder that you follow down his abdomen. You look over him - the clear desire in his face, his lips parted - and heat floods between your legs. “Well,” you reply, playing coy, “I can stop if you’d like. Let you get back to your work.
He lets out a shaky exhale. “Don’t,” he requests softly.
You press your lips to his navel, trailing feather-light kisses downward, and your name crosses his lips again, half-pleading.
You pause to look up at him, and he gives you a brief smile when you meet his eyes.
“Darling,” he says, his voice strained. “Not that I’m not enjoying what you’re doing, but - surely, you don't mean for me to be the only one this… scantily clad?”
As a matter of fact, you do. Or, at least, you had. You’re impatient. You want him close. Shuddering to his climax, coming on your tongue, groaning your name as his hand fixes tightly in your hair.
But you know he wants to see you, and you’re eager to give him what he wants. After a moment of internal debate, your hands begrudgingly part from him to undo the buttons of your top, exposing yourself to him as his eyes drink you in like the finest wine.
His thumb comes down to brush over your cheek. “I could live a thousand lifetimes,” he says, suddenly tender, “and never find anything as beautiful as you are.”
In response, you lift his palm from your cheek and place a kiss to it - a kiss which you can only hope gets across the thousands of words you’d like to say to him. Then, you gently move that hand into your hair.
Gale hesitates for a moment, then flexes his fingers, grip loose and careful.
When you put your tongue on him again, that grip tightens - not painful, but firm. You let out a soft moan around him and he curses, clearly trying to restrain himself from rolling his hips into your warm, waiting mouth.
In response, you plant a hand on his waist and take him further, encouraging him to take what he so clearly wants to. He curses again, breathing heavily, and chases after his climax, following the rhythm you’re so diligently setting.
If it weren't for the distant ache in your jaw, you’d be content to stay like this forever. Hearing the sinful noises he’s making as he gets closer. Feeling the muscles of his thigh flex under your hand. Listening to his panting, and the sound of your name uttered in warning as his pleasure builds ever higher.
He jerks his hips into you, once, twice - and then the taste of him is filling your mouth, hot and sweet, and he’s groaning your name like the sound has been punched out of him.
You keep sucking at him long after he’s come, until he’s jerking in sensitivity. He gently eases your head away from him with the hand that’s still in your hair.
“You really will be the end of me,” he says breathlessly. “You're wonderful. Now, come here, will you?”
You rise from your sore knees and meet him in a messy, wanting kiss, his lips soft and warm, his hand cradling your jaw.
He nudges his nose against yours, and as his hands tug at your waistband, you realize that you’re positively soaked. His pleasure had come first when he was in your mouth, but now, it’s white-hot and will not be ignored any longer.
“You’ve taken care of me. Allow me to return the favor?” he asks, eagerness spilling into his words.
And how could you ever say no to him?
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