#I don't even know what the acronym stands for because it's not in my text book or any additional resources I have access too
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My Course: here's a research task for you to do on A Thing! Me: Wonderful, we didn't cover A Thing in class but I'm sure it's in the resource document so I have a jumping off point and can effectively complete this section. My course: Nope :) Me: Okay, so maybe there's a database linked for me to look into because if I just do a web search nothing relevant comes up My course: Also no :) Me: what about an example of what A Thing is so I can work backwards from there? My Course: No, you have to research it :) Me: okay, so how am I actually supposed to complete this task if I don't know anything about what I'm researching or where to look for a basic definition let alone an in depth search? My Course: It's a surprise :)
#it's some software thing#which would be fine except it's obviously niche system software#I don't even know what the acronym stands for because it's not in my text book or any additional resources I have access too#and any web searches I have done have just hilariously brought up my assessment marking guide#I'll figure it out but it's 10pm and I've been trying to fucking sleuth my way through it all afternoon
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WIBTA
Would I be the asshole if I pull out of being a bridesmaid for my 'best friend'?
Background: E and I became best friends at 13 and we are both about to turn 43. we've been through a million ups and downs together. She has a crappy family and I became friend, sister, mother, support. In the last 15 years or so she has become a functional alcoholic and I have found it harder and harder to deal with her. I've bailed her out so many times. I've 'loaned' her thousands of dollars that I have no expectation of ever seeing again. I've tried to support her and given her advice when she asked for it (even though I knew she would ignore it) and listened to her problems (for hours and hours as she sucked down wine and got drunker and drunker). When she's not a drunken mess she's an awesome person, kind, funny, caring, generous and soberE was usually worth having to put up with dunkE.
Twice in our friendship we've had fights where it's taken us a long time to get back to speaking terms but there would be a text here and a phone call there, then we'd be back to talking for hours every other day. A year ago we had a huge fight and I decided I just needed to not talk to her for a while. I didn't even feel bad about not talking to her, it was almost a luxury to not sit on the phone and listen to her get progressively drunker as she slurped red wine. I did try the old tested route back to close friendship earlier this year. I would send her some texts when something big was happening or when I came across something I knew she'd like. But I would only get 1 or 2 word texts back. In February there was a major flood in our home town and I was freaking out about my family that still lived there - she was not, I felt like I was more worried about her mother than she was, I know they've got a bad relationship but we're talking a bodies floating around kind of situation. I was making multiple 5 hour mercy dashes with car loads of aid supplies and freaking out seeing these places we spent our childhood just destroyed and texting her about it and getting nothing back. I made a couple more efforts to contact her over the next couple of months but still nothing much back. Around May-June I decided I wasn't going to bother contacting her, I'd talk if she contacted me but I wasn't putting in effort anymore.
In September she sent me a text saying she was getting married in Jan 2025 and would I be one of her bridesmaids. I really didn't want to say yes. But almost 30 years of friendship, I felt guilty turning her down. And it felt like an overture on her part, like she was ready to make an effort. So I said yes and have been regretting it since. We are still not really speaking. We'll like each other's FB posts and that's about it. I mean there's still plenty of time for us to become friends again but I'm pretty much decided that if our relationship hasn't improved by the middle of 2024 I'm going to politely back out. It's going to be a backyard DIY wedding, she won't expect me to be heavily involved in the planning because she lives so far away that I couldn't do much more than turn up for the day and stand up with her. Me pulling out won't leave a hole in the planning so I know I wouldn't be an asshole for that. Where I might be an asshole is I think she would be really sad if I'm not there because I am the closest thing she's got to family, I know her mother and step-father won't be there and it's unlikely her brother will be. But I also kinda don't care because I'm sick of making the effort to be there for her when she's not making any effort for me.
So would I be the asshole if I pulled out of the wedding of my friend of 30 years?
What are these acronyms?
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you know what an ask blog is, why else are you here.
I wont be starting with character fluff, ill put that at the end, so read it if you want a visual understanding of who your talking to and how they will talking.
Warnings
I am an adult [by definition], and since i have little knowledge on who is on the other side of the screen, this space will be treated as an adult area. Posts are subject to include the following:
Suggestive descriptions and intimate innuendos
Descriptions of violent acts or bloodshed
Blunt and brutal honesty, because patience and kindness is a resource i spend at my discretion
Scariest of all, many posts will contain the horror that is "roleplay"
Excessive sarcasm
"Rules"
Asks that are directly sexual in any form will be ignored, so don't even bother
Generally speaking, if you are blatantly disrespectful to any particular group of people, you will be ignored at best, blocked at worst. 2.5: This does mean this blog is a safe place for any and all of the lgbtq community no don't make me type the whole acronym, i don't know what it is.
There is a negative chance you will be successful in shipping the shadow with someone, please take your attempts somewhere else
"Rules" will be added and changed at mod discretion, if and when i see fit.
Notes
The person who runs this blog, me, has almost no idea how to properly format tumblr posts, neither do i care to learn, so everything will be done on a whim
Additionally I have a total of 0 (zero) art skills, so the only picture that will be shown, unless someone else with free time and an interest in this character and decides to make art [which would be awesome], is the picture used as the blogs icon, the mask seen in which is from here.
All of this is done for fun and to entertain the person behind the screen, do note take anything here too seriously, because i sure am not
I have decided to go by "Tome" as how you talk to the mod directly. Why? Because like a tome, I have an ungodly amount of knowledge regarding what is happening in this group of ask blogs, so it felt fitting
Character/roleplay information
The shadow will speak with basic text, while occasionally having changes to their text to show things such as emphasis, or acts such as whispering/speaking under their breath, and to indirectly refer to another person through the use of color and emboldening.
-The shadows actions are depicted through use of text surrounded by hyphens, shown here-
[Mod talk, from I, Tome, is contained within square brackets]
(Context, narration, and important notices are contained within parenthesis)
{Rarely, the curly brackets will be used if mod to character interactions happen}
Reoccurring characters will eventually be listed within this post, when i feel like being less of a side character, please treat their mods with respect.
The "residence" of the shadow is a royal mess of enchantments, letting them have easy access to any part of the lands of the old faith, alternate reality or not.
Character description
The shadow is a creature who's form is crafted from a pitch black substance that seems to hover around the sublimation point, often times acting more akin to a gas than a solid, seemingly at the will of the shadow itself.
Standing around 6'1", they have no obvious gender, with all features being vague and hard to identify, or exceptionally androgynous, additionally having a pair of pointed canid ears sprouting from the top of their head, and several large fox tails trailing out behind them. [For visual aid, think any media depiction of a nine tailed kitsune.]
Their attire is made mostly of muted colors and dark tones, similarly to their shadowed form. Covering their face, they don a handcrafted mask made to resemble a red fox, despite their other canid features suggesting them to be one. Their upper body is covered by a large and baggy grey shirt with torn hems, a deep blue cloak further covering their form, with a light grey scruff, held in place by a broach depicting a red flower with five petals, white semi circles between the petals of the flower, all encircled by a ring of gold. their arms seem to have a bright red string wrapped around them, looking very out of place among the rest of their muted clothes. The attire for their lower body is rough and simple, consisting of a pair of baggy red pants, with several roughly sewn patches made from fabrics of various materials and colors, and a simple pair of black boots.
Final notes
This character exists for the soul purpose of interacting with ask blogs revolving around the game "cult of the lamb" [but if your here you probably already knew that], so while some of the statements of the character might break the fourth wall in the context of the game, that wall has already been removed by the other blogs, so i care not about its existence
The flower depicted on the brooch is not a Camellia, neither is the character a follower of any of the bishops.
The tag "Pages turn" will be used when an ask is responded too by the mod alone, if you wish to see what I, and I alone, have to say, use that tag.
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Hi! Hope it's ok to ask - have you any advice for getting into poetry? A lot of the time I think I just don't "get" it - why is it shaped? How does the brevity and the style and metaphors - work? How do you read it with understanding? Thanks!
So, I teach a six week poetry unit in my 9th grade English class. I will try not to dump six weeks' worth of talk on you in this ask!
If you ask ten poets, "What is the point of poetry?", you will get easily three hundred different answers. One of my professors once said, "Poetry is the neutron star of language." It contains only what is essential: the rest is compressed or stripped away. Reading/hearing a poem is an experience before the "meaning" is even engaged with, which is why poets use rhyme, meter, alliteration, and other sound devices that you can also find in music.
When I was in high school, I was taught the TPCASTT method of analyzing a poem. The acronym stands for the steps:
Title: What is the poem's title? What do you expect from this poem?
Paraphrase: Read each sentence (not line) of the poem, and put it into your own words. Focus only on the literal meaning; don't interpret. This step ensures you know what the poem says before you start trying to dig deeper.
Connotation: Identify and dig into each figure of speech (simile, metaphor, personification, etc). This is where we start to ask about meaning.
Attitude: (or tone). What is the speaker's overall emotional tenor, or attitude, in this poem?
Shifts: You can often find shifts between stanzas or signaled by "but". Marking the shifts in a poem helps you follow the poet's train of thought, the argument the poem is making.
Title revisited: Do you have any new thoughts about the title now?
Theme: What's the theme of the poem? By this point, you should be able to state the central message of the poem in a sentence or two.
That's a lot of steps, I know. I'm just including it here to give you a sense of how I was taught to analyze poetry. The general gist is "what does this poem literally say", then "where has the poet packed in extra meaning", then "okay so why is the poet saying that in this way".
I'll give you my own answers to your questions, staccato style. Poetry is shaped like that for the same reasons that we cut gemstones: because the form enriches the content. Line breaks add opportunities for wordplay and emphasis (consider "We are hard / on each other" and how the meaning of "hard" changes when you read the next line). The brevity requires each word or image in the poem to add to it; prose accommodates more fluff. Metaphors add meaning - "Juliet is the sun" tells us that Juliet is bright, she is glowing, she is life-giving, she is the center of the universe, she is what defines day and night for Romeo. That's so much more than simply "Juliet is beautiful". You get to that meaning by asking "what is the sun?" and then applying those answers to Juliet.
I'll close with two fairly short poems by W. B. Yeats, in case you want to test out any of this while you're looking at it. Hit me back with your thoughts if you want, or further questions! I'm trying not to reply with a text wall, but I can literally talk about this forever if you want.
"Aedh Wishes for the Cloths of Heaven"
Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths, Enwrought with golden and silver light, The blue and the dim and the dark cloths Of night and light and the half light, I would spread the cloths under your feet: But I, being poor, have only my dreams; I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.
.
"When You Are Old"
When you are old and grey and full of sleep, And nodding by the fire, take down this book, And slowly read, and dream of the soft look Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;
How many loved your moments of glad grace, And loved your beauty with love false or true, But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you, And loved the sorrows of your changing face;
And bending down beside the glowing bars, Murmur, a little sadly, how Love fled And paced upon the mountains overhead And hid his face amid a crowd of stars.
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Right so I was thinking, a rarely (or rarely from where I am) discussed aspect of ADHD is reading comprehension. Most people associate ADHD and reading as generally non-compatable, as it tends to require sitting still and focusing for long periods of time. What doesn't tend to be mentioned is that ADHD actually makes the act of reading hard, on occassion.
As a kid, I was constantly stuck with my head in a book. I read all the time, sometimes multiple books a day, because of the escapism it offered. I also have really bad ADHD, that I struggle to manage as an adult. Because of that, I struggle to read now, something I'm sure a lot of other ADHDers can relate to.
So, I've made a handy image to try and show what reading with ADHD is like, for people who don't have it. Fair warning, it's not meant to be easy to see/read, so if you already have problems with that then skip to the image ID below.
[Image ID: A text note, made to be difficult to read. Large portions of the text are blurry, and warped, while some are clear, and highlighted in different colours. Text with warping reads: "Hi there! This is an... ADHD... overstimulated. Sometimes... external overstimulation... process... process... overwhelming... paragraph breaks... This... Hope this helps!" End Image ID]
Here is a transcript of what the note says, without distortion: "Hi there! This is an extremely long message. This is what it feels like to have ADHD, and have to read a long passge of words, all closely together, when your brain is overstimulated. Sometimes this can happen due to external overstimulation, like bright lights, loud noises, or even just a combination of many things, that when put together we struggle to process. Sometimes it is because our brain is struggling to process new information, which can be caused by many things, including new or overwhelming emotions, exhaustion, and burnout. Often, without paragraph breaks or something to break up a wall of text, we find it difficult to read. This is often hard to explain if you don't experience it yourself. Hope this helps!"
If you skipped the big walls of text, that's fair. It's a fairly common part of ADHD, as a lack of clear visual differentiation often makes it hard to keep track of your place whilst reading. This is one of the many factors that affect our ability to read text.
For the image itself, the distortion follows some very simple patterns of ADHD reading. First of all, we do manage to get at least the first word or two. After that, our eyes tend to dart down, desperate to find patterns in the large wall of text. This can be formatting patterns, or word patterns. This is often why we tend to skip ahead over descriptions, straight to dialogue, and then have to work backwards, as written speech almost always breaks up large walls of text into small, manageable, pieces.
This is why some of the words are highlighted. They are either repeating, or similar to words previously seen. They also tend to be longer words, as these are easier to see at a glance, or capitalised words and acronyms, as these stand out from standard lowercase text. Our eyes jump to these, as they are easy to find quickly in lines of text, and we often use these as 'anchors'.
Anchors are places in text where we work outwards from. They tend to be words, or short phrases, that we can easily see at a glance, so that if we lose our place whilst reading, we can jump back to these metaphorical save points, knowing we have processed all the words before that.
Processing itself is another problem. An inherent part of ADHD is a difficulty, or inability, to prioritize tasks. This includes reading, which often means that when confronted with a wall of text, our brains try to process the whole thing in one go. This often leads to a difficulty in telling the difference between individual lines of text, combining words, or missing things, i.e the warping. This can vary in extremity dependent on the person, and obviously gets worse when combined with other things such as dyslexia, and other learning disorders.
Combined, all of this makes reading very difficult. As mentioned in the note itself, this varies depending on how stimulated our brains are. Something not mentioned in the note, however, is that this can also occur in understimulated brains. Due to a lack of engaging material, our brains will try to process new information a lot faster, in an sort of "finally we're doing something!" excitement. This tends to backfire, as processing issues tend to make people with ADHD put off doing the task, or get frustrated, making everything harder.
This doesn't just apply to books, though that is the most common example. It can also apply to text messages, group chats particularly, menus, posters, anything that can fit more than a few sentences of text on it, really.
So, if you have any friends with ADHD, suspected ADHD, or a processing disorder, and they seem to be struggling, then it might be worth asking if they need help reading the material they're having a hard time with. Changing the form of processing (from visual to audio) can help, e.g reading it aloud. You can also help by: pointing out the most important pieces of information; reading it over and giving them a basic summary, or; whatever they think will help them most.
I know it might be frustrating to deal with, but I promise we are likely even more frustrated then you are. We are the ones living with ADHD, and so have to deal with our brains all the time. Just give us some kindness and patience, and we'll get there eventually.
Thanks for reading, if you made it all the way through this. If you have a processing disorder feel free to add onto this! Any questions shoot me an ask/message. Neurotypicals do not clown on this post.
#adhd#actually adhd#actuallyadhd#autism#actually autistic#ik this is a post about adhd and i do only have adhd but ik there is a lot of overlap in these disorders#so i wanted to include it in case it is helpful#neurodivergent#though this guide is specifically for neurotypicals#hmm#anyway#feel free to screenshot and send this to people#im not super fussy on credit#like i did put a lot of time and effort into this so it would be nice but also if it helps people understand adhd a little better#then id rather it spread over credit#if it comes down to it#mine#my post#long post#text post
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@its-whitetomorrow
I appreciate that you take the time out of your day to read my witterings, and respond to them in detail, but I'm somewhat intellectually limited and it takes a while to write an answer.
The final one is a bit of a problem. The original post is long, your bit is long, and my addition is probably twice both put together.
Did you know Tumblr has a limit: no more than two hundred and fifty text blocks per post? I discovered this from experience, unsurprisingly.
I think the only solution is to split it across several posts.
I wasn't going to say anything, but I suppose I should.
I started this blog last May, to relieve the boredom of my main embarrassment, whose only likes (all three of them) were from porn bots.
It wasn't even meant to be about Pokémon. I'd left the fandom years previously. It was odds and ends, but I happened to find a few silly screen shots so wrote a couple of joke remarks, not expecting a ripple of interest.
Within a couple of hours I got more notes than t'other's managed even to this day. I had the idea this was where I was more at home, so I started taking it seriously.
My pseudonym was just daft thing I'd made up previously, to reflect that, whilst still in love with old days, I'm not exactly pleased with how it's gone.
I thought it might stand out as memorable, plus I like acronyms, so it affords me the opportunity to call myself 'T.A.P.'
In the early days the focus was on the 'maniac' aspect. Anger as a description didn't fit at all. The farther back you go, the more stupid and clownish it gets. It's not been like this all the way through!
Seriously, it used to be an entertainment blog, designed to make people laugh. It's all ages: no swearing, no porn, nothing to put anyone off.
(This post under discussion contains the only profanity I've ever deployed. I thought saving it up might add some oomph.)
I mean it, it's was all light-hearted ridicule. Every so often, there would be a slightly cutting remark, but mild compared to now.
Then, last September, someone I spoke to regularly, who assured me we were friends, suddenly cut off all contact.
At first I wasn't aware of it, but by October it became too glaring a silence to ignore.
I thought rifts started because of massive disagreements, but as far as I remembered our last exchange ended normally.
I found out by accident that the reason for it was because I am repugnant and morally inferior and so swollen with my own ego that the existence of others doesn't register. Instead they are but soulless droids built to worship the great T.A.P. mollusc.
Well that was news to me. I had no idea I came across like that. As far as I knew, I was on my best behaviour when we interacted.
I was polite. I tried to be ingratiate myself. I kept talk to the fandom. I didn't pry. I attempted humour when the opportunity arose.
I thought I'd done all I could to be liked, but apparently I hadn't. It was a revolting experience for them, for all of saying they loved me and I was 'honey'.
It really, really, really got to me, and the feeling hasn't abated, if anything it's worse.
As I said, I don't know what I did wrong, and because I don't, I can't mend my ways. If I am this repellant waste of flesh I'd like to change, but if I'm not told my offence, what am I meant to do?
If what I thought was the best I could be wasn't good enough, and instead was so sickening I don't deserve their presence, then I have no idea how to interact with people.
Maybe every time I respond to someone, thinking I'm at worst, civil, is really grotesque conceit, because my arrogance is so extreme I'm not even aware it's there. In my head it sounds normal.
It'd be too easy to scoff that they were the one with the problem, but, given all the arguments that happen in life, it can't always be someone else's fault. It's got to be you at least once.
They obviously think they were justified, so who's to say they weren't?
You may say not to let it worry me, that I should just get over it, and you'd be totally right. Being bothered makes me feel pathetic and petty on top of the rest, but this is me you're talking to, not a sane person. Self-hatred is more instinctive to me than breathing.
I always dwell on the negative. If one hundred people were assembled, ninety-nine of whom declared me the most wonderful being ever to live, and one remarked I wasn't all that special, it's him I'd remember.
It's called ghosting because that's what happens. There comes a moment when you accept that, no, it's over, rejected again, and it's like realising I'd died, and had been gone for a while.
Except I hadn't noticed the process, so I was always dead in a way, and they spoke to the silvery silhouette left behind, until that too dispersed into untraceable nothingness. Again, the silence is my fault for dying, not theirs.
I feel there's no point in messaging anyone, because I'll only disgust them too. Some blogs encourage contact, and when I see it I always think:
Yeah, but they don't mean YOU.
If it's another person I already spoke to, I can't shut up. I bombard them with text in the hope they know I don't think they're a menial droid. Every one I immediately regret, and wish I could take back, because that will irritate them until I'm just a sad, nagging past.
The Ghost-Maker used to reblog 99% of my work. This dropped to nothing overnight, so not only am I worthless, but so is everything I do.
Posts G.M. didn't like got 0-5 notes. Ones they did had 20+. Many a time, it took their reblog for anyone else to notice.
It was like others used that blog as a filter to pull the fool's gold from the murk of this one. Once their favour evaporated, so did a lot of the goodwill from elsewhere, so it's was as if Tumblr agreed I was scum.
Saying that above just shows they were right, because it takes one smug bastard to believe their existence registers with anyone else.
Please don't think I'm demanding likes, that my stuff deserves them, although as I'm arrogant I am. It's just that 99% to 0% is a bit of a fall.
Up til then, I held back much of what I thought about the current state of the anime, as they liked it, but now I have no reason to stop.
If I'm to be accused of all these vices I might as well have them. I'm dead, so who cares what I say? No one listens to a ghost.
It's not that I'm unconcerned if I upset anyone, it's just the truth that I don't matter enough for what I write to be valued enough to offend.
As a ghost, I think of this blog as invisible. It's there, but not really, so how can anyone mind?
Incidentally, the first week I was here I got blocked by someone who hates all fans from the Nineties. I don't care about that, as they sound like a cretin, and I'd have to be defective to gain their approval.
I just want to say I find that moronic. I don't hate new fans at all. I wouldn't block someone because we disagreed.
Blocking denies people access to your blog, stating they don't deserve your ART. That's arrogant to me.
Blocker likes Ghost-Maker, but...
Ever since around October, I've progressively become angrier and angrier. Whenever I'm here or Pokémon enters my head, it just reminds that I'm pond slime, about the most crude, malformed half-life freak you can envision.
I don't like being here anymore. I keep intending to leave, the site and the fandom, and set fire to it all before I go, wipe away the slug trail to spare people's stomachs.
I kept quiet until now, but holding it in just made it more intense. If I may describe myself in ridiculously flattering terms, I feel like a shaken champagne bottle, but the cork is welded in, so the only option is for the glass to shatter.
If anyone's reading this, wondering where the fun went, well this is why I flipped. The red mist won't clear. I can't see beyond it.
I won't name Ghost-Maker, because I don't want to start anything, plus most will take their side. They may see this as they still rifle round these parts occasionally for posts that aren't mine.
Well done, Ghostie. You're the lucky one. We'll never meet and you haven't seen me. Pity the poor sods I've encountered. There must be vomit trails across the land provoked by my vile condition. I wasn't aware of this until you let me in on the secret.
There's an English television presenter called Caroline Flack. She killed herself yesterday and everyone loved her. I feel guilty that I'm alive and she's not.
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[Image description: A screenshot of the tags on the previous reblog. Hashtags and multiple exclamation points are omitted in this description, one comma and one question mark were added for purposes of inflection, and tags were joined where the limit cut off the end of a sentence.
Begin text:
a stands for ally!
a still stands for ally!
allies are welcome in the community!
we want allies here!
not just "closeted" people
we want allies here too, there's a space for allies in the community
how will allies learn about us and get to know us and interact with us in the community if we don't let them in?
End image description.]
This is a great point! I should not have implied, however unintentionally, that allies do not belong anywhere near the community. Hell, it would be even more self-destructive to exclude straight spouses and partners of LGBTQIA+ people from the ability to support.
The original inclusion of the "A" in school clubs was, in fact, ALSO for actual allies-- helping the community using voices that are not marginalized in these specific ways is immensely invaluable, and the more intersectional activism gets, the better.
The problems arise when a) heterosexual cisgender allies speak over LGBTQIA+ voices, b) exclusionists within the community use the definition "allies" to gatekeep aro, ace, and agender people, and c) other exclusionists chop off the A entirely saying none of them belong. There are other issues, I'm sure, that I can't think of right now.
BUT!! The reason I made this post is because of all of the 'it has never stood for ally' posts flying across my dash, and it IS so important that closeted people have a place.
What I did not explicitly state is that if there weren't actual allies adjacent to the community, the camouflage would not work.
So, yes, leave room for actual allies in the space adjacent to the community, but make sure they get an intersectional education so they don't gatekeep thinking that they are protecting, or speak over the people whose identities are not cisheteronormative.
We have enough of a problem with that in the actual ranks of queer identities-- including the fact that "queer" itself is under assault by exclusionists because it's an inclusive, one-word, easy-to-remember umbrella term for the whole gigantic acronym. It even includes identities that haven't been defined yet!
So please understand that my intention was to highlight the fact that LGBTQIA+ people are actively and directly being hurt by the "ally was never part of the acronym" rhetoric. I felt that this particular conversation was not the place to muddy an address aimed at the people who would be most concerned with protecting closeted teenagers and members of conservative families or communities. Pride is not about cisheteronormative people. They can march in support, they can help normalize, they can be *allies*. But people who are uncomfortable with that need to know that the word is a shield for people who are not safe.
REALLY importantly, though? Nobody should be asking for anyone's community ID card in PRIDE in the first place omggggg. That shit is b-a-n-a-n-a-s!
TL;DR:
yes for specific reasons in specific ways, but not right this second! people in actual danger first please 😅
in LGBTQIA+ the A stands for:
Asexual
Aromantic
Agender
AllyCloseted
shoutout to the 90s and early 2k kids who were in the closet but could get away with going to their schools' LGBTQ clubs when the A got added so they could tell their parents they were Allies and supporting their queer friends, or even just The Idea Of Gay People Existing Somewhere depending on the level and brand of conservatism surrounding them.
There are still kids out there for whom this is true. There are still adults out there for whom this is true. Please don't leave them out in the cold. Let them be safe and also stay sane without having to uproot every part of their lives.
You don't out someone without permission, and you don't bully people if it's not safe for them or if they feel uncomfortable or if they're not there yet. You all know that, yes! But then what happens to them if they need support WHILE they're in the closet?
PLEASE don't cut them out of a safe space they've managed to find, one that they can have without putting themselves at risk.
Let them be "allies" and get to know people IRL who can be their support once they're ready.
...
but yeet any motherfukcin jizzrag that DARES to say it DOESNT stand for aro, ace, and agender because THOSE assholes are just exclusionist turtle pimps
sincerely, a 40yo aroace enby substitute teacher
#queer pride#queer allies#intersectional activism#messy politics yikes#i never feel eloquent enough#hopefully this helps#long post#hngh i did not expect this to explode
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Snowflake Challenge 9: Fandom Wrap
https://snowflake-challenge.dreamwidth.org/59643.html
Last month, Spotify sent out their yearly “Spotify Wrap” - summary of our listening habits over the past year, divided into categories of “Top 5 __”. We don’t have Spotify’s ‘scientific algorithm’ but we can do what we do best - estimate! These rankings are based on TIME spent on a particular item. If one of these categories doesn't apply to you, feel free to skip. You also don't have to list all 5 or just 5. ^_~
This one's fun, in part because I'm 100% sure my time estimations are wildly inaccurate. I wasn't good at estimating time before the pandemic and y'all think I can just look back on 2021 and do it in my head? What am I, C-3PO? But here's my WAGs* for the year:
What were the top five ways you took part in fandom in 2021 in terms of time?
Writing has to have taken up the most actual time, because unless I’m working to a flashfic deadline I am a very slow writer. I do a lot of planning and a lot of editing. I also had three separate Big Bang stories in the works that I had to bail out on, so there’s a lot of time spent there that isn’t reflected in what I posted last year.
Reading/commenting/reccing/etc
The Loki flashfic comm
Trying to solve a fictional character’s murder
I’m gonna roll Discord into one category, though that’s split between fandom discussion and modding duties. (If anyone asks, I'm happy to share my secrets for keeping said modding duties as light as possible.)
What were your top five fandom spaces of 2021 in terms of time spent? (AO3, Twitter, Tumblr, Reddit, Dreamwidth, and others)
Discord
Tumblr
LiveJournal
AO3
Real life (I’m using this as an umbrella for face-to-face interactions and zoom socializing as well as texting/fb messaging/etc with my friends or family.) (Probably about 75% of said time, both in-person and not, consisted of me and fmajorhell telling each other stories [horror and otherwise] about fandoms the other person isn’t even in)
What were your top five fandoms for 2021 based on the amount of time you spent on them?
Loki (Disney+)
Only Murders in the Building
Wheel of Time (TV... mostly? It's Complicated)
Spider-Man: No Way Home (a late entry that ROCKETED from the back of the pack. I might add a visual aid in comments)
IDK, probably Taskmaster (UK) and adjacent shows, depends on where you place the border of "a fandom"
I'm not creative enough today to come up with top-five lists of my own to add, but if you want to ask me for some I'll take a stab at it! This was fun, and, as noted above, probably extremely inaccurate.
* I've learned that apparently in British English this acronym stands for Wives And Girlfriends — as in, of male athletes — rather than the correct definition of Wild-Ass Guess. England, there's a reason we broke up.
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You can follow the Fandom Snowflake Challenge and see other people's entries via DW, tumblr, and who knows what-all else. There are no deadlines and you can jump in anytime!
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What You Know About SEO 2019 And What You Don't Know About SEO 2019
SEO (Search Engine Optimisation) could be the process of getting visitors from organic search results upon Search Engines. Our six experts talk about their favorite SEO tips in addition to tactics for building big visitors in 2018. Yes, all of us know it's still June plus we know it's only 2018 but if you haven't began planning and researching key developments which will affect you SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION in 2019 you could currently be falling behind. We furthermore take a look at just how new technologies like AI plus Voice search will begin in order to impact more on SEO because we move nearer to 2019 and beyond. Whenever every nation across the globe is busy in making their own due contribution within the growth sector in their own method by taking the route associated with SEO service and online marketing and advertising, Singapore cannot stop stand nevertheless in one point. By 2019, articles marketing is set to turn out to be an industry worth $300 billion dollars. Off page SEO relates to the strategies performed over and above your website that can end up being used to improve your research engine rankings. Due in order to the success of inbound advertising and SEO, more marketers are usually dedicated to improving their rating over other tactics. The best way to focus on these customers is by supplying high-quality SEO content that offers genuine and useful information in the direction of the readers. Another method provides a different page based upon whether the page is getting requested with a human guest or a search engine, the strategy known as cloaking An additional category sometimes used is greyish hat SEO This is within between black hat and whitened hat approaches, where the strategies employed avoid the site becoming penalized, but do not work in producing the best content material for users. Let's confirm our knowing of SEO basics with the one question quiz about the particular factors in search rankings: webpages, links and keyphrases. When it comes in order to Google SEO, the rel=canonical hyperlink element has become VERY IMPORTANT over the yrs and NEVER MORE SO. To place the particular focus on the website website visitor, it has been suggested that will acronym SEO should are a symbol of research experience optimization. It's important to remember in order to share content from your internet site or blog socially to provide it an SEO boost as well. Some Webmasters will pay out thousands of dollars to a few so-called professional SEO expert in order to get their Websites on best in the rankings. It is often preferable to ask questions upon their SEO procedures and find out whether they have knowledge associated with keyword density or if these people have information about the most recent keyword research strategies and equipment. 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Search Engine Optimization (SEO) will be a powerful process that may help make you and your own research more visible to research engines like Google and Search engines Scholar. I have simply no clue about SEO only several basics that is available most over the place and We feel this article must help as your other articles assisted me give some direction upon recovering my lost traffic plus generating more content as properly as repurposing old content. Every advertising SEO blog is usually talking about online video marketing and advertising and every third company professional you talk to is intending to shift marketing dollars to a good online video campaign. ” Simply by 2019, video is expected in order to account for 80 percent associated with all web traffic. Don't set it and overlook it. Take time to review your SEO keyword strategy each few months to make certain it's still relevant and attaining the final results you want. 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From Digital SEO Land, Rintu Biswas a professional SEO expert within Kolkata will assist you to be able to build quality backlinks aimed at your website. This ‘what is SEO‘ guide (and this whole website) is not about churn and burn type of Search engines SEO (called webspam to Google) as that is too dangerous to deploy on a actual business website in 2018. It helps your SEO work to ensure that your key phrases are added to the traguardo description and it will provide you a ranking boost in case your specific terms are obvious in this area. Moreover, a Google Penguin update drastically changed the position of backlinks on SEO, producing it more difficult to obtain link juice to a web site. Gone are the times of traditional SEO techniques, on the web content is changing. The cognitiveSEO Rank System offers accurate country, language plus city precision for all your own tracked keywords. 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SEO is conducted each on-site and off-site via various resources that are the existence of your web identity associated with different social media platform plus prominent display of your cyberspace link on other well-reputed internet sites. Our unique data science-driven SEO & content marketing platform can help your eCommerce business reveal millions of dollars' worth of earlier untapped organic search marketing possibilities. On the other hands, if the website doesn't make use of any digital marketing strategies or even SEO services, no one troubles to search for pages plus pages on Google just in order to find your website and go to it. Some dentists, who possess tried applying SEO, have not really been very successful in moving their website to the best of Google search engine. Prior to we do, let's check away a couple essential areas intended for SEO: social media and cellular. SEO can price between $100 and $500 for each month if you do this yourself with a keyword analysis tool. This SEO manual explains acquiring links from exterior domains. Let's review the basic principles of SEO (search engine optimization). SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION is conducted on the knowning that webpages rank because associated with how relevant a webpage will be to a search query plus how many links point in order to that webpage. Business professionals try to rely on these SEO techniques regarding optimization wishing for a larger profit. If you avoid look after SEO, you may get lost among the trillions of links out there. Heading forward SEOs have to end up being able to quantitatively show the particular value of their online marketing and advertising by identifying and implementing Important Performance Indicators (KPIs) that may demonstrate the value added simply by their SEO initiatives. The topic cluster model is definitely your way forward in SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION this year, but it's not really the only method to obtain your website content to position higher once it's been developed. WIthout simple SEO in area, your business may not end up being a result on the lookup engines when a customer is definitely specifically searching for your organization! SEO information can help improve your cultural efforts, and social media may help with the search rankings. Within his book Ultimate Explained Customization Your Website, SEO and web marketing expert Jon Rognerud displays you how to construct a top-end website and get top rating on all search engines. 00: 38 SEO is usually heading towards voice search. SpyFu will be really a paid tool that will uses 11 years of traditional data to help you discover your competitors' most profitable key phrases and the keywords they've utilized for SEO and ads. The fact is that on-site navigation hackers like search bar with smart autocomplete, internal linking with point texts or immediate customer assistance boost both UX and SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION. Even though it is tough to assume about the modifications that might take place throughout 2019, but we know with regard to sure what SEO trends associated with 2018 will take greater importance in 2019. Since it turns out, there's more in order to on-page SEO than optimizing with regard to keywords. Search engines motor optimization (organic SEO) describes the particular methods used to obtain the high placement (or ranking) upon a search engine results web page in unpaid, algorithm-driven results upon the given search engine. Also, videos include a lot of untapped probable - great for SEO plus make for good user proposal. The really best SEO expert 2019 will certainly tell you for High-End mobile devices, we're seeing more format changes to focus, provide the better experience, search results. Social SEO is especially helpful for online reputation administration. It isn't just the approach that Google ranks optimized content material, but the way that these people rank poorly constructed or taboo content that will push your current ranking to where it really should to be in 2019. Ray Cheselka, SEO & Ppc Manager at SEO and style agency, webFEAT Complete, predicts that will sites with over a 2 second load time will become penalized, and search intent will be going to carry on and grow within importance. SEO consists of ordering the site's architecture and hyperlinks to make pages inside the particular website easier to find plus navigate. In contrast, content material that no one is humming about have minimal effect upon social SEO. They are usually generally knowledgeable within the are usually of both SEO and content material marketing. When it arrives to reviews, customers work as a good army of link builders plus keyword writers so your SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION structure is shaped without a person having to lift a hand. But definitely, the acronym many people ask about is SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION, or search engine optimization. Between this plus 2017's Best SEO Campaign prize from the UK Search Honours, it's clear the world is definitely starting to recognize Elephate since one of the most trustworthy SEO and Content Marketing organizations in Europe. To understand how SEO functions to improve search rankings, most of us have to break it lower a little. Whichever way you choose in order to categorize keywords, one of the particular most important steps in SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION does keyword research. Some good examples of White Hat SEO consist of optimizing META tags, putting key phrases in URLs, submitting sites in order to directories, making sitemaps, obtaining hyperlinks on related sites, and generating keyword-optimized content. An SEO Executive optimizes internet sites to generate them show up increased on search engines like search engines and gain more website site visitors. Nevertheless, the fresh trend in SEO is ideal for long-tail keywords and even more conversational searches. SEO is the great marketing tool for the particular websites promoting their businesses on the web. Still, the keyword factor of SEO is becoming more and more difficult with Google Adwords concealing volume data. Making use of advanced Search engines semantic search algorithms, we link the gap between old college SEO and the new content material marketing. 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Within 2018, your SEO success will not depend on how well a person optimize your website for Search engines. But if you're brief on money, use these diy SEO ways to improve your natural rankings. If you choose SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION, you're helping Google's spiders in order to crawl and understand your posts. The job of a good SEO is to manage the particular optimization of websites to make sure they gain web site traffic from research engines such as Google and Bing. One great bit of content that will ranks well within the lookup results is its beginner's facts SEO. SEOs in addition to online marketing specialists in basic who are dealing with intercontinental Blog9T websites or for online organizations thinking about going international will certainly certainly benefit from attending ISS. We might like to serve you in order to save money and your power by offering affordable SEO solutions to increase link popularity. Work the key word into the SEO page name, content header, image, image betagt text, etc. SEO equipment provide position monitoring, deep key word research, and crawling through easy to customize reports and analytics. Certainly, white hat SEO always integrated creating high quality, unique articles as a prerequisite for acquiring long-term quality results, this truth hasn't changed. Beyond compensated and organic, there are various other types of SEO and expertise and niches within search motor marketing. User-generated content racks up serious SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION points by providing sites along with fresh content, bundles of inbound links, and sources for organically framing natural attributes. You'll find it right here Also really worth checking away is Moz's Beginner's Facts SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION, ” which you'll find right here, and the SEO Success Pyramid from Small Business Search Advertising. Off-page SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION strategy refers to the impact of a change in some other websites in your search position. Bruce Clay-based set the standard for honest internet marketing by authoring the particular " SEO Code of Integrity, " now translated into eighteen languages, and it has already been a respected leader within the particular ever-changing research engine marketing industry since mil novecentos e noventa e seis. Website SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION (including, content optimisation, meta optimization, the significance of links). A good SEO Specialist is someone that is an expert on the particular topic of search engine marketing. Just mainly because a proper On-page and Off-page SEO optimization work will provide a better Ranking to your own website in Search Engine Outcome Page (SERP). The largest SEO change and pattern I realize already happening within 2018 is Google's switch in order to a mobile-first index, so in the event that a site is not however mobile-friendly and optimized for this, it's critical to prioritize this particular as it is now basic for its SEO success. With good on-page SEO, lookup engines can easily index your own web pages, understand what your own site is about, and quickly navigate the structure and articles of your website, thus position your site accordingly. The sensible strategy for SEO might still appear to be in order to reduce Googlebot crawl expectations plus consolidate ranking equity & possible in high-quality canonical pages plus you do that by reducing duplicate or near-duplicate content. This can take a LONG period for a site to recuperate from using black hat SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION tactics and fixing the difficulties will never necessarily bring organic visitors back as it was prior to a penalty. The particular best SEO Guide is right here to dispel those myths, plus give you all you require to know about SEO in order to show up on the internet and some other search engines, and ultimately make use of SEO to grow your company. > > Upon Page Optimization: On-page SEO will be the act of optimizing unique pages with a specific finish goal to rank higher plus acquire more important movement within web crawlers. There are a lot This Year Will Be The Year of SEO 2019 of websites providing pertinent information regarding SEO and online marketing, and you may learn from them. But it's confusing why some businesses don't try out harder with analysis, revisions, plus new content with their SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION online marketing strategy. An effective SEO strategy may be made up of a variety of elements that ensure your web-site is trusted by both people as well as the lookup engines. By taking their particular marketing needs online and employing confer with an experienced SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION agency, a business can achieve thousands, or even millions associated with people that they would have got not been able to normally. A reputable SEARCH ENGINE OPTIMIZATION company carries on along with your Company Profile and then do individuals profile building and then Regional Business Listing Optimization. Our first five steps had been dedicated to on-page SEO strategies Link-building is the primary goal of off-page SEO, and will be also an enormous factor within how search engines rank your own web pages. So far since I know, this only functions for HTML or CSS webpages - I don't go very much for Flash websites, and I actually am unsure how that cookware out regarding search engines plus SEO. In fact, a large part of SEO in 2018 is writing for humans PLUS search engines (also known since: SEO copywriting”). SEO is the significant part of any web marketing strategy. Canonical: This connect to handles content syndication, which basically allows other blogs to post your projects (similar to franchising) without having hurting your website's SEO ranking—simply with the addition of a rel=canonical can obtain your brand and content out there on the web in several outlets, ensuring a greater get to and bigger audience without harming your own search results. We are usually offering affordable search engine search engine optimization SEO services to clients throughout the globe. If you want the strong social media strategy, a person simply can't ignore SEO. Another SEO-related plugin, W3 Total Cache is used to improve the performance of your Wp blog or a website simply by integrating features such as content material delivery networks to be capable to reduce the loading instances for your pages.
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AITA for refusing sex?
I (23M) have been best friends with someone I'll call Riley for the rest of this post (22NB) for just a bit over 5 years. We have been particularly close and sexually open with each other in a very casual sense.
Lately (3 months), though, I had been seeing a guy named John (25M) who I would consider my actual "partner". We aren't dating, but we have no interest in seeing anyone other than each other for the most part. John is monogamous and I am not, but we are aware we are in an "open relationship" (as we aren't dating) and can see other people if we wanted to. Thing is, I admittedly consider us (me and John) to be a monogamous relationship because I know he's monogamous, and that he's told me he genuinely only wants to see me despite the fact we aren't dating.
The problem is, previously, I told Riley that I was DTF if they asked me. The clause had been upgraded to "I will ask John first, because I don't know where we stand on that".
The next time we hung out I wasn't feeling it. I said no when Riley asked, and when asked why, I said I wasn't feeling it. They urged me to ask John so it wouldn't be a big deal. I folded, and asked John, including a clause in a separate message to say no, even if he was fine with it, because I didn't want to have sex. He obliged, and I reiterated that I did not want sex, and John was not comfortable with me having sex with someone else, and showed Riley the messages (with my addition deleted). They gave me a "fine", and was passive aggressive for about an hour before they decided to leave.
Later, they texted me about it, saying that I was a jerk for turning them down when I previously was very chill with the concept of having sex with them, and that they should matter to me more than John.
I feel like the asshole because I lied to them in two ways, saying I was interested previously, and then asking John to say no to me having sex with Riley. I'm a very "no means no" person, so I was offput by their reaction, but both me and Riley are very rejection sensitive people, so it was just Normal for me. I still feel like I should have said yes, just to prevent this from happening.
TD;LR: AITA for saying no to sex with a previous sexual partner because I found myself in something of a "committed" relationship, and then lying about why i didn't want to have sex?
What are these acronyms?
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Am I the asshole for how my previous 'situationship' ended? (I genuinely do not know what to call this situation so that's gonna have to do).
Okay so I (20F) met a guy that we will call Chris (21M) on tinder in Oct 2022. We were at the same uni, and we had good rapport over text, so we decided to meet up. He was pretty awkward but once we actually got talking he was a good chat. Nothing romantic or sexual was discussed/acted upon.
We hung out a few times after that. I kissed him once after a night out, which he didn't reciprocate or ever mention again. Given the complete lack of romance/sexuality coming from him, and the fact that he is a very socially awkward person, I took the hint that he wasn't interested and didn't know how to tell me. I felt that i made the fact I was interested clear and he hadn't taken me up on it, so I just dropped the subject. We continued talking as friends, and I genuinely thought that's all it was.
Come Feb 2023, I went on a night out with a different group of friends, during which a friend of mine, we'll call Tom, kissed me. I nearly had a one night stand with Tom, but I ended up not sleeping with him and just going home because I was too drunk. Being drunk and cringe, I made a pretty crude post to my tumblr before I passed out which was something like "someone is actually attracted to me? Nail me to a wall!" (Long deleted because drunk me is an embarrassment lol).
I woke up to texts from Chris, who had seen my tumblr post and was upset. I was pretty confused because 1. He doesn't even use tumblr, 2. I don't remember ever giving him my account name but it must have been in a screenshot at some point, and 3. I was not under the impression that we were dating... I let all that slide like an idiot because I was really hungover. Chris and I then had a chill discussion about what we were, and agreed to be friends. Cool! I thought that was the end of the drama. We chatted and hung out afterwards with 0 difference to how it had been before.
Cut to May, and I sent him good luck wishes before an exam. He says thanks and I just didn't think about it again, normal exchange.
Over three weeks after I'd wished him good luck, I woke up to a wall of text he'd sent me at 3am where he went into detail about how i had strung him along and wasted his time; that he thought I was manipulative and playing "mind games" with him for that good luck text, which he took as me trying to psyche him out before the exam and make him fail the module; that he didn't want to 'just be friends anymore' because the knowlege that i strung him along hurt too much; that I "ignored him as he walked past" (I still have no idea where or when this happened, I straight up did not see him wherever it was). He also went into detail about physical and mental health issues he'd been going through (that I wasn't aware of before the wall of text) saying that I'd been a great help with them during first term, then "ruined his second term". He went off that my lack of communication skills is a detriment to everyone around me.
I was completely blindsided by all of that, and honestly really hurt that he'd accuse me of trying to make him fail his exams, but I'm not sure that he's not got a point? Looking back, yeah maybe I should have straight up asked him if he was interested back in Nov. But idk I'd say kissing someone is a pretty fucking clear communication that i was interested, and he made 0 reaction to it, what was i supposed to think? I'm not in the habit of pushing people when they do nothing in the way of reciprocation. But, one of the issues he disclosed to me was that he had gotten an autism diagnosis in April and I can see how not being 100% clear and verbal in my communication may have been the root of the issues here, given that he was undiagnosed autistic for most of the time I knew him.
Anyway, was my lack of communication an asshole move?
What are these acronyms?
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