#I don’t really know how people track tags on other peoples pages tbh so this is mainly for me

[jo-harrington]

I read this twice. TWICE.

And do you know every time I get that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach with this story, I look at the True Love tag you’ve put for it and I think “everything is gonna be ok in the end.”

Why are you so intent on wrecking us. Cue Ron Burgundy: “I thought you were kidding!” It was not angsty as I was thinking. (I know, Angstfest 1985 up next) but it just made me super sad for Eddie. Omg. Baby boy.

It doesn’t help that I’ve been listening to Keane’s “Everybody’s Changing” on repeat for my own story inspiration, but it just really hit home on this one. Eddie watching everything change around him and he feels stuck. And the only thing that’s different than seeing the same kids pass him by is Reader. He has this crush and he doesn’t know but he SO HOPES she feels the same. And each time she shares a little something with him, opening up, and he’s like “ok this could happen, she could be in the same torture i am in, she’s letting me in, what if I did something…what if…what if?”

The TOUCHING!!! *dramatic gasp* I am a SUCKER FOR A HAND TOUCH. HOW REGENCY. Let me SHOW YOU MY ANKLE MISTER MUNSON and he immediately gets a boner.

And I’m feeling a little SUSPISH about Chrissy. Because either she’s crushing on him and he’s a) gonna take the chance and reader is gonna feel like TRASH and like “ok how did I ever entertain these feelings” or she’s pulling some shit and he’s gonna get hurt OR she has a crush and Jason and the Boys are gonna hurt Eddie because of it. Are they gonna hurt reader? Are they gonna SPREAD A RUMOR OMG LEI IM GETTING AHEAD OF MYSELF!!!

I have so many thoughts and am stopping myself from just crawling through the internet with all of the snacks and treats to bribe you.

All of that being said, once again an AMAZING CHAPTER of an AMAZING STORY. I am so proud of you and I know you have to be feeling proud of yourself. Us slow burn hoes are in it with you to suffer together. It’s the best barbecue, the best perpetual stew. And eventually we will get the tastiest morsels of a payoff.

I am salivating.

(I was going for a cheek kiss, but giving the salivating, the licking also applies. 😘😘😘🥰🥰🥰).

Don't Stand So Close To Me — Chapter 7

Eddie x Teacher!Reader

Chapter 7/? 4.1k. Series Masterlist

Summary: Forced to move back home to Hawkins after your fiancé cheats on you, you begin to fall in love again with an audacious 20 year old metalhead, only there’s one problem — he’s still in high school and you’re his English teacher.

Forbidden love is complicated. What will your desire teach you?

Tags/cw: forbidden romance, slow burn, perv!eddie, smut (18+ mdni), true love, student-teacher relationship, 10 year age gap, mutual pining, sexual tension, emotions, drama, angst, character development, happy ending :)

Chapter warnings: weed, angst, sibling death mention

Eddie held a joint between his lips, the paper wetting in his mouth as he tapped out a melody on the fretboard of his warlock, fingers making contact with the strings at a feverish pace. He took a long drag, exhaling the smoke through his nose. The ash on the end of it was dangerously long, threatening to drop onto his bedsheets at any moment. 

He paused, reaching over toward his nightstand to tap off the excess into the crowded ashtray and instead knocked over two empty Mountain Dew cans. They sputtered drops of sticky liquid onto his magazines before clattering onto the floor. Eddie cursed. He sighed and reached down into the abyss between his nightstand and the bed to retrieve them, cringing at whatever else may have fallen down there that he had long forgotten about.

It was 2:30 on a Sunday afternoon and Eddie had been awake for all of two hours. There was a gnawing feeling in the pit of his stomach. A feeling that he was all too familiar with on Sundays. He returned his hands to the fretboard and noodled around with the strings, tapping out the melody again as the tingle of the drug washed over him. 

He glanced over toward his backpack slumped in the corner by the desk. It was 2:30 on a Sunday afternoon and he had not even thought about his homework. Well, that wasn’t entirely true. He had thought about it. Quite a few times actually. 

Yesterday he thought about while he was hunkered over the monster manual that he had to reach into his backpack to retrieve. He thought about it while he was at band practice last night too. And again while he was at the gas station at one in the morning, loading up with cigarettes and twinkies. He even thought about it while he was devouring them in front of his television.

He didn’t think about it at all on Friday night though. Well he kind of did, but that’s because he was mostly thinking about you and it just sort of came with the territory. He was mostly thinking about the way his hands felt around your waist, the one he had been itching to touch for two months now. He thought about the way your body felt in his arms, so warm and soft and real.

He thought if he could play it over and over again in his mind that he could exist in the moment for longer than he was given. He wondered when he would be given another. If he would be given another.

He thought about you, out with your friends at a bar he wasn’t even old enough to drink at. He thought about how often you went out like that, and how many times it would be before someone else saw you the same way he did.

His finger slipped and he muttered a curse at the sour note. He adjusted his headphones and glanced around the room. 

There was a pile of clothes at the foot of his closet that had been there for almost a month now. A pile of records in front of the cabinet meant to contain them for even longer. The dust was starting to collect on the top of his amp beside it. He couldn’t even remember the last time he vacuumed.

He wondered what your home looked like. If you had a pile of records too or if yours all had homes like they were supposed to. He wondered what sort furniture you had, if you had any posters or paintings or empty Mountain Dew cans sitting around collecting dust.

Probably not. 

His stomach growled. He had barely left his bed let alone eaten anything yet today. He peeled off his headphones and set his guitar to the side as he climbed out of the warm comfort of his bed. He opened his bedroom door quietly and padded down the short hallway into the kitchen. The linoleum floor was cold against his bare feet. 

He opened the fridge door slowly, careful not to wake Wayne sleeping in the dark living room. He glanced over the milk, eggs, and sparse condiments, spying a plastic bag with leftover once-frozen pizza inside. There were two pieces left.

Eddie glanced over toward the living room, hearing Wayne softly snoring on the fold-away bed. He looked back at the bag of pizza and grabbed it before quietly shutting the fridge.

There was a pang of guilt that came over him as he crept back down the hall toward the lighted door of his bedroom. Guilt for taking the last of it. The pizza. The bedroom.

He shut the door softly and returned to the warmth of his bed, folding his legs under him as he peeled back the plastic baggie.

Cold pizza always tasted better when he was high. Everything did. The combination of the cheese and the cold red sauce, the chewiness of the crust as he bit into it. Even the little brown sausage nuggets had more flavor.

Eddie sighed as he felt the food travel down his throat and fill his empty stomach. 

He thought about you again, wondered what you were doing at that moment in time. He thought about you making lunch in your kitchen. Probably a sandwich, or a salad — something healthy. You probably ate it at a table, even wiped it down after you were done. He thought about you in your quiet apartment all by yourself and wondered if you thought about him too.

He wasn’t entirely sure you returned his feelings. Not like how he felt about you anyway. He swore he could feel it though, there was something. Something about the way you sighed when he held you, how easily your body pressed to his, like it wanted to be there. It was the way you never drew away when he drew closer. The way you looked at him. The way you laughed at his jokes and watched him as he left the parking lot. 

Eddie glanced at his backpack slumped over by his desk.

He picked a few crumbs off of his sweatpants and sprinkled them onto the floor, taking care that they didn’t end up in his bed.

He wondered what you would think if you walked in right now. 

What sort of interest could someone like you possibly have in someone like him?

If there was one thing he was really good at, it was wasting his time.

______

It was a Monday morning and Eddie Munson was tired. Tired of the looks people gave him as they passed him in the hallway. He was tired of waking up early to come to a place that he’d outgrown. Tired of not being good enough to leave it.

He felt his eyes lose focus as he twisted the dial on his locker. It took him three tries before it opened.

He had stayed up entirely too late again. For why, he wasn’t really sure. Maybe to punish himself. He supposed waking up at noon the day before didn’t exactly set himself up for success either.

In his defense he did finally crack open his chemistry textbook at 8 PM, but he might as well have been reading Greek. He stared at at the letters and numbers and formulas until he finally just gave up and tossed it back where it came from.

He did your homework though. He read the final chapters of the book and took notes on them as assigned. There would be a test on Friday and he didn’t want to disappoint you. 

He stared into the contents of his locker, at the crumpled papers already accumulating underneath the pile of textbooks that were strewn about without a home.

Suddenly there was a soft voice that came from the other side of the cold metal. “Hey Eddie.”

Eddie swung the locker door inward. Chrissy Cunningham leaned against the locker next to his, clutching textbooks against her soft white cardigan.

“Hey,” he said, giving her a hesitant look.

“So I hear you can, um,” Chrissy bit her lip in thought, glancing off to the side, “Hook people up with certain things. If you know what I mean.”

Eddie raised his eyebrows and grabbed his history textbook before shutting his locker. “Yeah, I know what you mean. What do you need?”

“Well, Tina’s having a Halloween party again this year on Saturday and I was wondering if you could, you know. Deal.”

Eddie thought for a moment. He thought about how much money he had, which was not a lot. Not enough to get the tattoo he’d been wanting for over a month now. He thought about how good it would feel to focus on the prickling sting of the needle driving into his skin for a few hours. It was hard to think about anything else when you were in the chair, and he liked that about it — like a strange meditation. He could use a break from his thoughts lately.

“Yeah, I can deal. What are we talking?”

“Just grass I guess, not trying to kill anybody,” she said with a little chuckle. “People always overdo it at these things.”

Eddie gave a single nod, “I’ve got that.”

Chrissy smiled, “Great, here’s the address,” she said, reaching on top of the books she was carrying to hand him an orange flyer.

He took the paper in his hands, looking at the little hand-drawn ghost with the date, time, and address on it. Come and get sheet faced. 

“I’ll see you there then, yeah?”

Eddie looked up from the paper, creasing it in the center with his thumb before shoving it into his pocket. “Yeah, I’ll be there.”

“Great,” she said. Her eyes glanced over him, scuffing the toe of her white shoe against the tile absentmindedly, “Looking forward to it.”

______

“Harpies don’t have ranged attacks, we’d be better off hitting them with spell damage while you tank them,” said Jeff, flicking his empty milk carton across the table at Mike.

“Their song is ranged, what are you talking about?” Mike retorted, flicking the milk carton back at him.

“That’s not an attack, dumbass,” said Jeff, chuckling.

Dustin glanced over at Mike and interjected. “The song lures you into close range so they can hit you with their talons. And they can do it from a distance, so…”

“But it’s not an attack,” said Gareth with a smirk.

Eddie sighed and swallowed his mouthful of tater tots. “It’s not an attack.”

Jeff laughed. “See?” 

Mike shot Jeff a look, “Well, the spell casters aren’t going to be safe hanging back either way.”

“Guess you’ll just have to hold agro then, Pally,” Jeff said, flicking the milk carton back across the table. The older guys chuckled as the carton tumbled into Mike’s lap.

“Hey uh, by the way, I think we’re gonna have to make band practice later on Saturday,” said Gareth, “My grandma’s in town and we’re doing like… wholesome family shit, you know how it is.”

Eddie wished he could say that he did. “I can’t do it later, I’m going to a Halloween party on Saturday.”

Dustin snorted, “What are you going as?”

“Nothing. It’s, um, a business arrangement,” said Eddie with a look, hoping he would take the hint.

“The one at Tina’s?” asked Gareth, his eyes lighting up.

“Yep, that’s the one.”

“Can I come?”

Eddie paused, giving him a puzzled look, “I mean, I guess. I could probably use some help.” And some company, but he would never admit that. “Why do you wanna come so bad?”

There was a gleam in Gareth’s eye, “Cindy’s gonna be there, I saw her with one of those orange flyers in science today.”

A low oooh emanated from the table followed by a nudge from Jeff.

Eddie shot Gareth a look, “Who?”

“Cindy. You know, Cindy Wallace, from the science project?”

Eddie looked unimpressed, “Oh, the one you bailed on us for? Yeah I remember.”

“Yeah well, she’s gonna be there, so,” said Gareth, sitting back in his chair.

Eddie sighed, “Fine, you can come, just don’t make an ass of yourself or I’m leaving you there,” he said decidedly, popping another tater tot into his mouth.

“Cindy can take him home then,” laughed Jeff, nudging Gareth again.

The table erupted in laughter. 

______

Eddie stared down at the chemistry homework that was now past-due as you went over the first equation for the third time. You had been at this for twenty minutes and he was comprehending absolutely none of it.

“It’s kind of like baking a cake, like all the ingredients come together to create this new thing. It’s different than math in that way,” you said gently, “Here, let’s use the equation for water as an example,” you said, scratching it out on the upper lefthand corner of the paper.

The fluorescent lights beat down on him, tiring his eyes even more than they already were. It made his skin feel hot. He hated the lighting in school. It was clinical, and oppressive, and made him want to take a nap. He blinked, watching your hand move across the paper, noting the soft dusting of chalk that still lingered on your knuckles.

“Ok, now let’s apply this same concept to the first equation here.” You scratched out the problem and walked him through solving it step by step.

He followed along, trying his best to pay attention. It was like you were saying words but his brain was not computing.

“Does that make sense?”

He sat back and looked at your handwriting, neat and pretty. None of it connected. “Um,” his eyes bored into the paper, unable to face yours. He was afraid he would look up and see frustration, or even worse — disappointment. 

His face felt hot, his chest like someone had placed a weight there. The numbers and letters blurred in front of him as his voice caught in his throat. 

He felt like an idiot.

He could feel your eyes glance over his face and he worked up the courage to meet them.

“I’m sorry,” he said finally, digging his nail into the side of the pencil. He swallowed as he felt the heat rush to his face again, his pulse pounding in his ears. “I’m an idiot, I —” He stared down at the paper again.

He wanted to cry.

“No you’re not,” you said, your voice was warm and kind.

His nose burned as tears threatened behind his eyes and he hated himself for it. Hated himself for feeling like a child. For being unable to solve a basic problem even after all the extra help. Hated himself for still being here after six years. He didn’t know what he did to deserve your patience. He wondered when it would expire or if he was better off just dropping out. Maybe then he could ask you out like a real adult. He didn’t feel like one though. Not right now.

He felt a hand on his back. 

He turned to look at you. The softness in your eyes could have melted him. Your gentle hand moved back and forth between his shoulder blades soothingly and he sighed at the touch. 

“You’re really smart, Eddie. This just isn’t your thing, that’s all.”

You meant it, he could tell.

His eyes were large and wet but his tears obeyed and did not spill over his lashes. “Thanks,” he said softly. “For your patience, for your time, for … everything. I don’t know if I deserve it, but…”

Your hand stopped moving. His heart lurched. He watched as your expression changed, like you were pained all of a sudden. Your pretty mouth twitched, eyes lowering in thought. 

“Please don’t say that. It’s really no trouble, I…” Your eyes darted back and forth between his, laying down words like you were hopping across a stream on small rocks, careful where you landed. “I really like… spending time with you. I…” 

He leaned closer toward you, like a magnet was pulling him. “I like spending time with you too.” He could feel your breath against his cheek. His eyes lowered to your lips, so soft and so close. He wondered what it would feel like to close the gap and snatch them up in his.

Your eyes grew wider and Eddie swore he saw your face turn a deeper shade. He ached when you took your hand away.

“Let’s put this away and work on something else. I think you just need a little break.” You turned back toward your desk, bringing that same hand behind your neck as you cast your eyes downward. “Maybe we can come back to it later, or on Wednesday.” 

Eddie swallowed and glanced away, turning to put his homework back in the beat up folder it came from. His face felt hot all of a sudden.

“So, uh, how was your birthday?” he asked, searching for anything to distract from the nerves twisting in his gut.

“Oh, it was uh,” you tidied your desk, “Fine. It was nice. I listened to the tapes you gave me,” you said, meeting his eyes again.

“Oh yeah?” He perked up.

“Yeah, multiple times actually,” you said, a bashfulness creeping through your smile. “I really liked them.”

“Really?”

“Yes really. I love music that’s driving, you know? Like, it takes you somewhere. It’s got this energy about it that’s really addicting, like it makes you want to move. I can see why you love it so much,” you said. Your eyes were sparkling, the redness in your face fading.

“Which one was your favorite?”

“Favorite song or album?”

“Both. I’m curious.”

You put a curved finger to your lips in thought. He loved it when you did that. “I think I liked Paranoid the best out of the two. And then song, let’s see... I think… War Pigs.”

Eddie blinked, “Really?”

“Yeah. It’s a protest song, which I love. It’s the one that really made me pause and think, you know? It’s really true, what they’re talking about. How war is a game played by people who have power and the pieces are the people who don’t, who have no other choice but to be played. It’s a really powerful song. Catchy as hell too.”

Eddie propped his elbow on the desk, resting his cheek against his hand. He was tempted to bring you his entire collection if it meant that he could listen to you talk about them all the way you talked about everything — with careful perception. 

You sighed softly, lowering your eyes before meeting his once more. “You know, I think more people would like it if they really listened.”

There was a tug at his heart. A loud and restless part of him stirred — awakened, acknowledged. “That’s what I’ve been saying,” he said breathlessly. “For years.”

You smiled at him in a way that made him feel something he felt so rarely. Seen.

He twisted at the rings on his fingers.

“Did um, did you do anything fun this weekend?” you asked, tidying a few papers on your desk.

“Nah, besides the usual stuff. Band practice, campaign planning,” he said, trailing off. “Homework,” he added quickly. “How was the rest of yours?”

“Oh, uneventful. Reading, errands… just boring stuff. I tried decorating for Halloween but…” you glanced off to the side and he noticed your brows furrow slightly. “I just haven’t been feeling all that festive this year. It’s weird living alone.”

Eddie nodded solemnly, shifting in his chair. “Yeah, I uh, got invited to a party this weekend but I can’t say I’m really feeling festive either.”

“Oh.” Your face dropped. It happened so quickly that he almost didn’t catch it before you corrected it. “Are you going as anything?” you asked innocently.

“Nah. I’m just… going.” 

He wondered what you’d think if you knew why. You — behind the desk with chalk on your hands and worry in your eyes. You — staying later than required, with no extra pay, for him — a drug dealer.

He cast his eyes downward and thought about his father. A criminal. Only he was in jail and Eddie was free. Free to sell drugs to teenagers. They had more than a few things in common — he couldn’t manage to graduate high school either. 

He kicked himself for even mentioning the party.

There was a deep worry in your eyes, deeper than you could hide. “Please be safe.” 

Eddie leaned closer, “Are you ok?” he asked softly, probing you with his dark eyes.

“Um,” you lowered your eyes again, thumbing at the eraser of the pencil in your hand. “This time of year is… complicated for me.” For once you looked at a loss for words.

“What happened?” his voice was gentle.

You sighed and met his eyes. “My brother,” you started, swallowing as if your voice was caught, “My older brother, he… drove home drunk from a Halloween party. He was 17 and new at driving, and the roads were wet, and — “ you swallowed again, blinking as you stared off into nothing, “He didn’t make it home.”

The waver in your voice made his heart clench. “I’m so sorry.” 

He looked at you. 

You — who he watched day after day from the back of the classroom. You — who had all of the answers. 

You looked so small from this side of the desk. 

Your hand trembled, hovering above the mess of eraser shavings that the two of you had made together. He wanted to touch you. His hands twitched in his lap. When you found the courage to meet his gaze again, he caught the barely-there shimmer of tears threatening your lower lashes, and he couldn’t help himself.

Pulse racing, he reached across the space between and took your hand in his.

Your eyes were wide with trepidation.

“It’s ok,” he said softly.

His touch was delicate at first, timid until you squeezed back. His eyes fluttered up to yours for just a second, searching for approval before returning to your hand. 

Your hand. The hand that writes back silly notes on his papers in green pen. The hand that opens his gifts wrapped in newspaper as if they were Tiffany’s boxes.

He rubbed his calloused thumb over your knuckles, wiping away the chalk. Your fingers were cold, fragile almost. Your palm so soft and warm against his. You had a paper cut on your index finger, he noticed. 

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, swiping the knuckle from your other hand underneath your lashes quickly.

“Don’t be, it’s ok.”

He brought his other hand around yours, his grip solid and gentle all at once. He felt you relax and his curious fingers changed positions, as if he was trying to commit the touch to memory, to feel as much of your hand as possible. What surprised him was how eager yours was to do the same.

He felt your fingers move against the back of his hand, along his tendons, his knuckles, his rings, feeling the strong bones under the soft flesh. The pulse in your wrist hammered against his, your palm starting to sweat.

The echo of footsteps clicked up the hall, coming closer. Your eyes flashed up at his and you took your hand away.

You cleared your throat, sitting up straight again as the footsteps passed the door. “Um, thank you,” you said.

“Sure. Anytime,” he said softly, scratching his head.

The two of you sat there a moment in stillness. Nothing but the ticking of the clock and the clicking of heels moving away now.

“He was really something else,” you said softly, the light in your eyes returning. “From what I remember anyway. I was in eighth grade when it happened. You know, I can’t even say you would have liked him. I mean he was…” you trailed off, lost in thought, “He was in a different crowd. But he just had this energy about him that was so… magnetic. You have that in common at least.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Magnetic?” 

The look you gave him made his heart flutter. A glint he caught in your eyes, there for only a second. “Yeah.”

You thumbed at the pencil on your desk again, brows furrowed in thought. “I never really went to many parties. Not in high school, not in college either. There’s a part of me that feels like I really missed out.”

“If it’s any consolation you’re really not missing much,” he said with a little chuckle. 

“I know but it’s still… an experience.”

Eddie nodded. “Yeah. Can’t argue with that.”

You sighed and looked at him again, the worry creeping back onto your features. “Please be careful, ok?” 

“I will,” he said. “I promise.”

______

A/N: We thought Tina’s 1984 Halloween party was angsty, who’s ready for Angstfest 1985??

I also want to make a little note that I hope teacher!reader having this very specific backstory element doesn't deter anyone from the story! It was important for me as a writer to give her a reason for her behavior and relationships (specifically with her mom). It's all going to make sense, I promise! Just stick with me 💜

I want to give a special shoutout this week to the people who leave feedback (especially every single chapter!), and to the people who send me excited asks and messages. Your encouragement really keeps me going, you have no idea. (I do love all your hearts too, shy folks, please don’t get me wrong! They make me smile and I cherish you.) 

I’m a small blog. I have less than 1k followers (but I’m closing in!). When I posted chapter one I had 165. This is my first big series and I’m learning a lot in the process. So if you love this story and feel comfortable sharing it, please do! I love you.

***If you want to be tagged or asked to be and don't see your name here, it's because I couldn't. Update your settings like this!

Taglist: @mermaidsandcats29 @toxicjayhoo @ooo-protean-ooo @jadequeen88 @wroteclassicaly @kissmyacdc @mantorokk-writes @msgexymunson @bebe0701 @latenighttalkingwithgrapejuice @bibieddiesgf @idkidknemore @alizztor @godcreatoreli @shotgunhallelujah @ethereal27cereal @munsonsgirl71 @luna-munson83 @eddiemunsonsbitcch @tlclick73 @emxxblog @siriusmuggle @sidthedollface2 @dollalicia @lma1986 @catherinnn @eddiemunson4life420 @readsalot73 @ruby-dragon @3rriberri @princess-eddie @nightless @eddiemunson011 @trashmouth-richie @eddieswifu @thew0rldsastage @quinnsfineline @chaoticgood-munson @beep-beep-sherlock @emily-roberts @averagemisfit03 @vintagehellfire @haylaansmi @newlips @munsins

@sllooney @lunaladybug734 @callingmrsbarnes @ajkamins @mimsthebannished

Tags continued in comments 💋

[barbiesimadventures]

Join here for the adventures of Barbie Sim (aka Eris Nyx) who is just here, living her Extra™️ Barbie Life like she is the Anakin Skywalker of Barbie Sims. She got nicknamed Barbie Sim when I made literally everything she owned some shade of magenta, and despite the fact that I love her absurd name (and I think the Goddess would approve of the chaos!) I still call Eris “Barbie Sim” in my head, so that’s what she’s gonna be called.

I have been thinking of making some kind of simblr for a long, long time, and was finally convinced to do it because there were actual people enjoying this absurdity that I posted as humor when I realized how I was leaning into the pinkness of this blonde Sim I made. Some posts may be about other Sims I have going, and I may post my progress on the Soul Sickness challenge here, too, but I promise I’m a good tagger!

I will post a mods & CC Masterlist at some point in the near future, but I can pretty much promise that most of the shit I use comes from PralineSims, MySimRealty, nraas (bless them), Nightcrawler, treeag, douglasviega, and Around the Sims3. Like I said, full mod & CC list incoming. I might even post up a list of my nraas settings because unlike all the people I’ve seen who post theirs, I don’t do rotational gameplay, and there aren’t a lot (or any easily findable) settings pages from people who just play one household in a town.

I’ll also post a list of tags as they’re created so you can blacklist if you want to avoid seeing Barbie Sim’s Soul Sickness run, attempt #97 (I finally made a damn Notion page for the fucking complicated ruleset because FUCK I could never keep track of the difference between a Farmer and a Provisioner! Might do the same for the Legacy Challenge because I’m using Notion for goddamn everything these days!)

Barbie Sim has been so fun in the few days I’ve been playing her that I’m super likely to recreate her and play her as one of my main characters for that Soul Sickness challenge, and while I’m not a Fallout fan (nor do I dislike it, I’ve just never been interested enough to play the games), the Vault-Tec challenge looks pretty fucking awesome, too! I’m not about to do them both in the same world, I don’t hate myself that much, my dudes, but I do use Overwatch to export my tuning files/settings for the rest of my nraas mods so that I don’t have to spend the whole first five hours re-setting them. Haven’t gotten to it with Story Progression, yet, but a lot of my settings were based on SarahSims, who I won’t tag because I don’t t know them and I’d feel weird? I might have taken it to a different place on certain things (like making harvesting plants take way less time dammit) and PleasantSims.

This post is under construction, is basically what I’m saying here and probably always will be as I adjust my gameplay over time.

But one thing that is never going to change is that my language is never gonna be “family” friendly, unless yours and mine are a lot alike and the word “fuck” drops from everyone’s mouth. I laughed my ass off the day my kid got a Critical Mission Failure in Mass Effect and dropped a muttered “fuck” right after. I also use some skins and such which have actual nipples, and I don’t use the mosaic blur (except on children, yikes). So I’m probably going to end up marking this simblr as NSFW and just post away, but I’ll wait until the first time my nude sims show up.

I also play a lot of sims that are inspired by and named for various fandom characters (I’ve got an Ember McLain sim from Danny Phantom who is a fairy because I don’t like playing as a ghost in-game and I’ve had a lot of fun getting her to the finish line of her career). I play a lot of fairy sims, tbh, because I like the extended lifespan. I am Attached to every sim I make. They’re almost always one I downloaded and then altered (and I sometimes really want to ask the original creators WTF they were smoking when picking out clothing for those sims, especially the ones that come with CC that I’d never download in a million years if it hadn’t come with the sim!). So, like, don’t be surprised if a lot of my male sims look like Thor, is what I’m saying here! I turned a PralineSims Gwen Stefani into Darcy Lewis and I think I did a great job! I’m never worried about total accuracy when it comes to the face, my dudes. If my sims are pretty to me, and they are close enough to the original that I’m gonna know who they are meant to be? That’s good enough.

I don’t create things, I’m sorry. I’m not here to make shiny things because I don’t know how, though I’ll probably reblog those that do because maybe I’ll be able to find them again, too. I’m just here to chronicle Barbie Sim and her adventures, along with my adventures into various challenges. I am honestly expecting 0 follows on this, so if you’re here and reading this hella long intro and you still wanna stick around? I am 100% in love with you.

Barbie Sim and I will return soon for fun and laughs in pink. Lots and lots of pink.

Love, luck, & lollipops,

Neph (that’s me, Barbie Sim’s Simmer)

[ugh-againwiththenames]

So Many Fanfics So Little Time

This is just my list, I have seen so many (but if you want to use it it’s all yours too!).  I’m not a writer.  But I am a hell of a reader. Voracious one might argue. I just wanted to track my progress through the weeds of the absolutely never ending supply of Destiel and Cockles fanfic. 

Read on if you want to see what I’ve read, and what I’ve thought. I am but one person with opinions - some of them may be unpopular - some of them you might agree with, but if you find something you haven’t read here, I encourage you to do so. 

Honestly, this is just so I can track what I have read already, and when my friends ask, I can reference something easily. I have found some different fics on all kinds of ‘best of’ lists all over the interwebs. And I love recs - so rec away friends. 

As someone who reads a solid 40 novels a year typically, I don’t come by the “I read a lot” innocently. I do actually read a LOT.  When not reading fanfic (a new obsession, all things being fair), I usually read a lot of Fantasy/high fantasy, romance/erotica, and or YA (yeah, that was a bit of a ride no?).  So from this one might digress that I like fluffy, cute stories, complicated and supernatural/paranormal type stories, and I sure do not shy away from violence or smut (or maybe violence with smut? *smirk*). 

I have read all of these in the last 2-3 months (I will continue to add as I go). I had never read a fanfic until 2-3 months ago.  A lot of these wonderful people are on here, and I mean you no offence by not directly tagging you - I’m still learning how to actually properly use this site. Links to AO3 are included (and I love you all). 

These aren’t necessarily in any real order - I did read T&S first, followed by 91W, and 4LW...after that it’s just a shit show of Long or Short, Destiel or Cockles - smorgasbord. Some of these are the most popular Fics out there, and others I’ve never seen recc’d anywhere (just sort of accidentally happened upon them).  So let’s get to it, shall we? 

Twist and Shout - ok look. I understand the stigma associated with this one, but it was the FIRST one I read. It was the ball that shot me down the hill, and I haven’t stopped since. So. I loved it. I CRIED like a baby. SOBBED. It was not the quality of the writing but the way the story was developed and delivered. I have Never Cried Like This Reading a Story IN MY LIFE. It’s a rite of passage. Read It and have an opinion - it doesn’t need to be mine.  

Author(s): gabriel, standbyme   https://archiveofourown.org/works/537876/chapters/955188

Ninety-One Whiskey - aka 91W, it is mentioned so much, and is SO worth the read.  I continued my dive into the war fics (not typically my bag really and here I was reading 2 in a row).  There are a couple of followup stories as well to this series (and yes, I’ve read them all).  Although I’ll say that the original is my favourite. I often got lost in a bit of the War/Tactical descriptions, but would recommend it to anyone anyway. Ugh...the “stolen moments”...they were at the same time tragic and the most amazing things ever.  You feel me? no? go read it. 

Author:  komodobits   https://archiveofourown.org/works/2362190/chapters/5214500

Four Letter Word for Intercourse - aka 4LW.  OMG just, OMG. I loved this story. I loved it so much. I think I read it in a day.  Devoured it. It’s so HOT. Just read it. If you haven’t you’re missing out.  LEMME AT IT. I loved “knowing the secret”, and had some major anxiety about that realization dawning (I had to take a breath, and be like, no, no, this is gonna be a mess, but it’s gonna be SO GOOD - I was not disappointed).  There’s more than one work here too - read them all. PLEASE. 

Author: bendingsignpost  https://archiveofourown.org/works/16086839/chapters/37568591

Memories Bring Back Memories (Bring Back You) - This was the first Sobs one I read, but it sent me on a spree.  this is the Memory Loss one.  I have one piece of advice here - read everything by Sobsicles. You can thank me later...just go to her page, and fucking sort to supernatural (or not, read it all!) I’d list them but I’d fucking seriously be here all day.  Also, her tags make me laugh so hard.

Author:  sobsicles https://archiveofourown.org/works/24022945/chapters/57796885

Orpheus - I love this one too, Tattooed!Cas, my LOVE. paired with Mechanic!Dean, my HEART, #help.  Read this one in one evening as well. (I was on a roll).  It’s a one night stand that turns into more (much like my last relationship)....hmm...maybe this is why I was pulled in - although to be fair that is the last similarity to my shitty love life! I do not remember how I stumbled onto this one (tattooed Cas may have been the draw...tbh). Read the warnings though, there is some triggering stuff in this one - but if you can handle it, it’s definitely worth the read. 

Author: sysrae       https://archiveofourown.org/works/2364347/chapters/5220227

Have Love, Will Travel - Can you say no to Stripper!Dean? Cause I sure as hell cannot. Typical sort of character development here with Dean having trust issues, and Cas being painfully awkward...(but in like a super cute way?).  Would Recommend. 

Author: squeemonster   https://archiveofourown.org/works/565455/chapters/1011747

The Inexhaustible Silence of Houses - Change of pace here...It’s got a nice twist.  I didn’t actually clue into how it was going to end until very near the end (maybe I was being oblivious), when the realization came over me and I was...man. I was DONE IN.  I hope that doesn’t spoil (I need some kind of way of remembering them). Voiceless!Cas Hunter!Dean

Author: Askance (doomcountry)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/560268/chapters/1000755

Adagio - This is super short, and super cute. Honestly, I would read the whole thing just for the last line. It’ll take you less than an hour if I remember correctly. Go, I’ll wait. I squeeed. did you? 

Author: noangelsinthegarrison   https://archiveofourown.org/works/1397248/chapters/2928145

Any Little Heartache - super easy read (not in a bad way, but in a ‘you’ll fly through it’ way).  It’s mid-length, not graphic, but really fun hospital AU. HeartSurgeon!Dean / Nurse!Cas - enemies to lovers anyone? Fuck you to Fuck me? yeah. YUM. 

Author: followthattardis https://archiveofourown.org/works/5143376/chapters/11838311

Ad Astra - This is another short(ish) one, just one chapter.  And by that I mean that this is written like a very long poem. Cas as a star who has visited Dean many times over the years of his life, that culminates in 4x01 barn scene. It’s ‘awe’ sad. ‘puppy dog eyes’ sad. The writing format took me a bit to understand what was happening - it’s my lack of poetry knowledge, not the writing.  

Author: nhixxie https://archiveofourown.org/works/1013491

Ad Astra Per Aspera - This is a cute story.  ESL writer, no judgement.  I found this while looking for the one above, and thought the premise looked cute - and it was. Misunderstanding leading to Dean realizing he’s actually Bi.  Miscommunication leading to realization.  

Author: Riverchester https://archiveofourown.org/works/12354336/chapters/28101816

Psalm 40:2 - Time travel post-canon Cas and Pre-series Dean.  If you’re wondering how that works, strap in for this ride, it’s well worth it. 

Author: unicornpoe https://archiveofourown.org/works/30786425/chapters/75992444

Addicted to You - Warlock!Dean/Incubus!Cas - accidental ‘mating’ (I actually really don’t like that word, but there’s sort of no avoiding it in this situation). Cute story.  When you drunk dial a succubus and get an incubus instead...Whatever will we do? 

Author: Ltleflrt https://archiveofourown.org/works/4387346/chapters/9959288 

A Glimpse Beyond - End Fix-it. Not yet complete, 10 chapters so far...I want MORE! Reliving memories Dean/Cas & Sam/Eileen.   

Author: NorthernSparrow https://archiveofourown.org/works/27731689/chapters/67875925

Cas-ti-el - Please I want more...It’s like the story just started. Please write more of this story!! 1 chapter, it’s a trope prompt challenge, but I want it to be a full on story of its own. Imprinted names of their soul mates, Dean doesn’t understand his (because it’s in a different language)...I’m frustrated by wanting this story to keep going. 

Author:  Valinde (Valyria)  https://archiveofourown.org/works/1941591

Our Bodies, Posessed by Light - another short one. Not going to lie, this one took a little getting used to, and I can’t say that I enjoyed it too much for the sole purpose that the premise gave me the willies.  Cas has to vessel jump - ends up in Sam...I got through it, it had a good ending, but yeah, sorry. This just wasn’t for me. 

Author:  obstinatrix  https://archiveofourown.org/works/260289

Peanut Butter Pumpkin Wedding Cake - Waiter!Dean / Writer!Cas - This is so effing cute, just misunderstanding after misunderstanding bumbling around like the couple of dorks that they are. It’s only one chapter. 100% would recommend. 

Author:  Sparseparsley https://archiveofourown.org/works/223962

Destiel, Actually - This is another super cute story, 5 chapters. Gabriel playing a singular role in putting Dean and Cas in awkward positions to push them together.  I fucking DIED at “oh, I am the sub” - needs context, but I guarantee you that you’ll laugh out loud...

Author:  Bexism  https://archiveofourown.org/works/399934/chapters/658398

The Smell Before the Rain - This was my first A/B/O - a big apology to all those who are into mpreg and whatnot, this was my lesson that I am not. this was not for me. Also - I’m a firm Cas (Alpha/Dom) believer, and i’m good with switch Cas, but it’s hard for me to take him being the full Omega here, when paired with the rest I just couldn’t do it. I finished it, but, not my thing. I know now. 

Author: jscribbles https://archiveofourown.org/works/22355230/chapters/53406127

Crazy Diamonds - This is another short one, only 3 chapters - it’s a body swap for Dean, 4x02 him and 2018 him swap places (assumption that 2018 him is “with” Cas).  It’s a super cute little story. 

Author:  pantheon_of_discord https://archiveofourown.org/works/16151642/chapters/37738631

The Breath of All Things - Wheelchair!Dean / Volunteer!Cas.  This is a lovely story, typical Dean self-hatred etc. Triggering for those with suicide warnings. It had me in tears at the end. There’s a really spectacular quote near the end that I found so romantic I screen grabbed it. 

Author:  KismetJeska https://archiveofourown.org/works/994750/chapters/1967519

Kind of a Forever Deal - SummerCamp!AU This is just a really cute and fluffy summer camp AU.  Which is so different from 91W (That’s right, check the author)! I was a little disappointed with the ending, but otherwise really enjoyed this all the way through and was loving all the discovery and young characterizations of all the characters. 

Author: komodobits https://archiveofourown.org/works/999291/chapters/1978478

Everytown, USA - Best way I can break this one down? Wanderer!Dean (listless and without a place in the world, he ends up in a small town...), Twin!Cas (that leads to some fun things). There are a number of points where you’re gonna yell at Dean for doing stupid shit (that are very much in character for him to do), you think, well, yes, obviously you’re going to do that you silly fucking boy [affectionate]; but whyyy? (but we know). 

Author: aileenrose https://archiveofourown.org/works/1797559/chapters/3854836

Chalk and Chainmail - HighSchool!AU, Cas is an artist, Dean LARP’s - it’s cute and angsty. 

Author:  lemonsorbae https://archiveofourown.org/works/804704/chapters/1517551

A Little Patience - Ok. you want smut? This is your story. You want Kink? This is your story.  I actually did not finish this. It got a little carried away in my opinion. It was VERY panty kink oriented (which, while essentially canon isn’t really my kink) so, if you want that Panty Kink on full display? Go forth and enjoy! it  is thirty something chapters, I got to the mid-twenties I Think. 

Author: riseofthefallenone https://archiveofourown.org/works/1750058/chapters/3739232

Control - I REALLY ENJOYED THIS. Which is saying a lot for someone who has already admitted that a Subby Cas isn’t really my HC - so to so thoroughly enjoy a Sub!Cas story? (maybe it’s the tattooes...*wink*). It’s an AU where Cas is the head of a company - Dean is a callboy I guess, for lack of a better term. Just read it.

Author: dothraki_shieldmaiden  https://archiveofourown.org/works/31156601/chapters/76993217

More (I copy pasted the next lot from my google doc, I’ll flush them out later - no i wont...)

Teach Me (short) - movie night in the bunker, things get a little carried away   Author:  Chiyume  https://archiveofourown.org/works/5961327

You Light the Spark (in my bonfire heart) (short) - when cas doesn't realize that dean is unaware of his feelings, super short, super cute                      Author: noangelsinthegarrison https://archiveofourown.org/works/1193910 

Communication Breakdown (short/cockles) - dean ends up in Jensen's head while he films the confession scene, no sexual content Author: jujubiest   https://archiveofourown.org/works/29669601/chapters/72951339

Look What You Made Me Do (short/cockles) -      -  Vegas Con 2020 / jensen comes out with a song     - cute short - no sexual content Author:  green_blue_heller https://archiveofourown.org/works/30251592 Full House (short/cockles) - reimagined version of the rented house story - putting it in order (so to speak). funny / cute / fluffy not explicit   Author: n_nami  https://archiveofourown.org/works/30855827

Cyber Sex (short/cockles) - anastiel https://archiveofourown.org/works/31467086      - shameless post GISH Fest zoom call porn      - Short (very short)

It's Complicated (cockles) - gail_morgan https://archiveofourown.org/works/31434938/chapters/77747519       The GISHtake (short/cockles) - MellyCrazyCoconut https://archiveofourown.org/works/31508099     - cute short post GISH zoom     - oops "babe, really?"  

(10.02.2021 updated) Since last update: New reads - Fuck i’m gonna be here all day - there’s not gonna be as much gonna be NO detail in these breakdowns...sorry! This has now just become a “what i’ve read list” as opposed to a Rec list...

Love, All Alike (Pt. 1 Love, All Alike) - Phantoms_and_Foxgloves   https://archiveofourown.org/works/4555599/chapters/10370646                             - Though The Stars Walk Backward (pt 2 Love, All alike) - Phantoms_and_Foxgloves

And this, your living kiss - opal_bullets   https://archiveofourown.org/works/18083927/chapters/42744872

Come On, Let's Strike a Match (Domination and Submission: a love story pt 1) - anyrei & queerwerewolf ***   https://archiveofourown.org/works/25722478/chapters/62458810    - Playing With Fire (D&S: a love story pt 2)    - We Kiss and the Flames Get Higher (D&S: a love story pt 3)     - Sparking That Old Flame (D&S: a love story pt 4) 

Cinderwings - bendingsignpost Cinderella!AU**   https://archiveofourown.org/works/12847041/chapters/29336421

Linden - fleeceframe Swan!AU**   https://archiveofourown.org/works/33126730/chapters/82236118

No Netflix, No Chill (short) - dorian_they   https://archiveofourown.org/works/28764966

Can't Drink You Away (short) - dorian_they   https://archiveofourown.org/works/28785792 

Jensen Totally (Does Not!) Snore (short RPF) - Dorian_they   https://archiveofourown.org/works/30315717

Dean Ships It (short) - dorian_they   https://archiveofourown.org/works/30349434

All about control - wingless   https://archiveofourown.org/works/9151930/chapters/20791243

Aesthetics in Autoerotica (pt 1 Aesthetics in Autoerotica) - relucant   https://archiveofourown.org/works/3885544                                                             - The Ties that Bind (pt 2 Aesthetics in Autoerotica) - relucant

Let's take a drive - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32581027/chapters/80819581 

Enchanted ink - castielslostwings TattooArtist!Dean TattooArtist!Castiel AU ***   https://archiveofourown.org/works/23043622/chapters/55109530

The bones beneath our skin - darknessbound   https://archiveofourown.org/works/24633754/chapters/59515804

The Plot (RPF) - Castiel_Left_His_Mark_On_Me   https://archiveofourown.org/works/2795588/chapters/6274970

The Gentle Force with which you Take Me (RPF) - Phoenix_Ascended   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32110120/chapters/79549183

According to all known laws of Life (Pt. 1 Cursed Metaphors) - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/29207901                                                          - and he's back (with a mind of his own) (pt. 2 Cursed Metaphors) - sobsicles

Six hundred sundays (and many more) - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31158776

Aching in the Absence of you - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31832977/chapters/78811378

gorging myself on you, still can’t get full (insatiable) (Short) - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32203291

memories bring back memories (bring back you) - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/24022945/chapters/57796885

Dream Come True (short) - bendingsignpost   https://archiveofourown.org/works/28071159

tall grass - aeli_kindara   https://archiveofourown.org/works/13127040/chapters/30030726

asunder (Short) - rageprufrock https://archiveofourown.org/works/62115

Apheresis - bendingsignpost BloodDonor!AU **   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32674783/chapters/81056680

we always were but never knew it - frightfullyrude   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32698324/chapters/81119503

In this Louisiana Bar (Short) - fleeceframe   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31764487

The Hitchhiker's Guide to Alternate Universes - n_nami   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32687929/chapters/81092785

my heart a compass - lagaudiere https://archiveofourown.org/works/28629951

Unsound Inverses - sp8ce (not complete)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/29836881/chapters/73413300

The Jensen Mistake (RPFish) - fellshish   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31950169

tell me about the dream (Pt. 1 Kids are coming home) - playedwright   https://archiveofourown.org/works/27984813/chapters/68544450

It's handy to know (FIMMF Themed ;)) - RosaMarloes   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31761322

So Says The Sword - komodobits AngelTrueform!AU**   https://archiveofourown.org/works/12597892/chapters/28695592

Communication Breakdown (RPFish)- darkshrimpemotions (jujubiest)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/29669601/chapters/72951339

Carry You Home - Casloveshisfreckles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/26982637/chapters/65862916

In the Shadow of your Wings - Enochian Things (Salr323)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/7531294/chapters/17121655

When Harry Met Sally (RPF) (Pt. 1 When Harry Met Sally ‘verse) - mnwood   https://archiveofourown.org/works/7622347/chapters/17351845    - Eight Dildos (RPF) (Pt. 2 When Harry Met Sally ‘verse) - mnwood    - Attention, Please (RPF) (Pt. 3 When Harry Met Sally ‘verse) - mnwood             - Boat Trip (RPF) (Pt. 4 When Harry Met Sally ‘verse) - mnwood

A Winter's Tale - NorthernSparrow   https://archiveofourown.org/works/2654327/chapters/5930561

A Close Shave - NorthernSparrow https://archiveofourown.org/works/3090167

r/supernatural - renrub (short) https://archiveofourown.org/works/27626783

sam reads destiel fics - rebshome (short - funny!)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/33721624

Angel Cookies - noxsoulmate Chirstmas!AU **  https://archiveofourown.org/works/11729640/chapters/26427765

Under The Midnight Sun - NorthernSparrow Arctic!AU **   https://archiveofourown.org/works/16690645/chapters/39143677

Bron-Yr-Aur - mrbluesky (Short) https://archiveofourown.org/works/28225335

The Dean Winchester Beat Sheet - saltyfeathers   https://archiveofourown.org/works/19258594/chapters/45800209

The Meaning On My Skin - saltnhalo   https://archiveofourown.org/works/18005378/chapters/42538133

Red Right Hand (Pt. 1 Murder Ballads)  - Duckyboos   https://archiveofourown.org/works/4306110/chapters/9760008    - Are you the One that I've been waiting for? (pt. 2 Murder Ballads) - Duckyboos   

Riptides - sharkfish   https://archiveofourown.org/works/13230426/chapters/30263556

Damn Fine Ride - Cimorene105 (pt 1 - rodeo) Cowboy!AU** (I’m a horse girl, sue me...)  https://archiveofourown.org/works/14342340    - My Face Just Does This, Sometimes - Cimorene105 (pt. 2 rodeo)    - The Kinkiest Thing I've Ever Done- Cimorene105 (pt 3 rodeo)    - All Signs Point to Love - Cimorene105 (pt. 4 rodeo)    - Monster Love - Cimorene105 (pt. 5 rodeo)    - My Man, The Siren - Cimorene105 (pt. 6 rodeo)    - A Pain in My Ass - Cimorene105 (pt. 7 rodeo)

Astrolabe (terra incognita pt 1) - reluctantabandon, Winter_of_our_Discontent   https://archiveofourown.org/works/3348812/chapters/7326794    - Drollery (terra incognita pt 2) - reluctantabandon Winter_of_our_Discontent    - Rubrication (terra incognita pt 3) - reluctantabandon Winter_of_our_Discontent

Go Down With This Ship - PorcupineGirl   https://archiveofourown.org/works/8023642/chapters/18370474

Fire and Ice - Castielslostwings (Firefighter/Paramedic AU!) **   https://archiveofourown.org/works/23286295/chapters/55768486

The Structural Similarities of Hunters and Onions - Faster_Than_the_Speed_of_Sound (Short)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/33383101

Castiel Novak's Office, This is Dean - emmbrancsxx0   https://archiveofourown.org/works/22411336/chapters/53545840

Out of the Deep (out of the deep pt. 1) - riseofthefallenone - MERMAID AU! **   https://archiveofourown.org/works/548878/chapters/977676

Dean (and Cas') Top 13 Zepp Traxx - pantheon_of_discord   https://archiveofourown.org/works/10909440/chapters/24256989

I'll Be Good - LittleAngelCassie   https://archiveofourown.org/works/4118334/chapters/9282234

Kenosis - CastielsCarma (Short - part of Destiel ABC collection)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/30411720

[starglow-xx]

owning a bakery and being discovered by the ada and the port mafia (part 3)

platonic! yosano akiko x f! reader

type of writing: head canons !!

this is part of my head canon series, flour & fluff !!

tag list is open !! go to this google form and fill it out to sign up!

series synopsis: owning a bakery at 20 is tough; even more so when you have to handle members of two opposing organizations! this is your journey to meeting those fools and creating an unlikely bond with each of them. but only at the cost of your peace and sanity.

fandom: bungou stray dogs

content: fluff & platonic stuff but trigger warning!! there may be a sensitive topic for others

*getting grabbed and pulled to an alleyway! alcohol mentioned!*

please remember that yokohama isn’t the friendliest place, especially at night.

previous: part 2 : their beloved president

author’s note: same ages as last time!! (so that means everyone is one year younger than canon; that makes yosano 24)

this one is actually pretty long :0

i got info abt her likes on her wiki page (careful! there’s spoilers!)

and yosano is a queen and no one can tell me otherwise

the doctor is in the house (quite literally)

going grocery shopping was an okay chore in your opinion

it honestly depended on your mood or whatever kind of shit happens when you go shopping

cause like something always, always happens whenever you go do groceries

sometimes it’s good, sometimes it’s bad, and sometimes it’s just plain weird

one time some weirdo proposed to you in the middle of the store asking for a double suicide

he was good looking you’d admit but it’s not like you’d ever see him again

or so you thought

a n y w a y s

every so often, you’d run out of real person food in your apartment

you mostly survive off all of the leftover bakery treats and ingredients—which works out pretty well actually—but bakery supplies unfortunately also run out quite often

and also unfortunately, one time when both fukuzawa & ranpo took a visit to Sakura’s, fukuzawa argued that “no you can’t live off sweets for the rest of your life”

ranpo was scandalized and scrambled to cover your ears

you guys were at it for a while

in the end you sided with fukuzawa causing ranpo to go off about “betrayal from the people he cared most abt” or smth like that

you guys were okay again after bribing him with sweets :)

for bakery supplies you usually have them delivered bc you order them in large quantities bc ahaha no way were you gonna carry like 15-20 50 pound bags of flour no way

when days like those happen, you close up the bakery early so you aren’t walking home when it’s too dark

you scheduled it to happen every first saturday of the month

on those saturdays, you close at 5 instead of at 8

currently, you were at the grocery store looking for basic cooking ingredients such as proteins, vegetables, fruits, and most importantly, snacks

ranpo’s been rubbing off on you

the sun was starting to set and you were walking home with your two bags of groceries when shit went down

tbh you were kinda expecting it cause your grocery run was peaceful for once

but what you weren’t expecting was a wack-a-do to appear out of goddamn nowhere right when you were opening the side door to get to the staircase up to your apartment

like honestly

let a woman do her own thing

the man who grabbed you tried to covered your mouth so you couldn’t scream but you didn’t exactly make it easy for him

you kicked and thrashed around even using the grocery bags—that were somehow still in your hand—as a weapon and the man struggled but he was still bigger than you and was able to bring you to a nearby alley

he reeked of alcohol and you spotted a wedding band on his left hand

not that you cared about the detail in the moment

you kicked him in the groin and in response he let you go only to fall on broken glass that was in the alley way

using the wall to help yourself up, you grabbed a nearby wooden stick and struck him right on his back

your attacker fell and you immediately turned on your heels to escape only to fall back down on the hard cold ground once again

you lift your face up and look back to see the man holding onto your ankle

grabbing a shard of glass—cutting yourself in the process— you begin to swing it at him only for him to easily grip your wrist and stop you

you get ready try and kick him in the groin again but you’re interrupted as your attacker gets sucker punched and flies to wall

you look up to see your savior and you’re blessed to see a beautiful woman, probably not that much older than you are—she’s probably around ranpo’s age— donning a white long sleeve button up, a matching black necktie, knee length skirt, and gloves, along with tights, red heels, and a pretty butterfly clip in her short black hair

but what you really notice is her eyes

ranpo’s eyes were pretty but you like hers just a bit more

you’ve always liked the color magenta

the pretty lady holds out her hand and you take it graciously and thank her as she helps you up

as that’s happening, your attacker gets himself onto his feet and his groan catches both of your attention

he struggles to stand and the pretty lady simples saunters over to him and delivers an uppercut knocking him out cold

you’re stunned and you breathe out a “thank you” making her turn towards you

she notices the condition you’re in

bleeding scrapes on your hands, arms and legs, small rips in your clothes like your tights, blouse, and skirt, and the ruffled state of your hair and clothing

she asks if you live nearby and you tell her that you own the bakery that’s one or two buildings away

when you tell her that, it clicks in her mind that you must be the bakery girl ranpo’s been talking about and the friend fukuzawa was cat sitting for

it’s been abt two weeks since ranpo and fukuzawa first met you and since then, they’ve seen lucky in the office plenty and the boxes of your signature sweets even more

if those two trust you, she has no reason not to

she smiles at you, holds out her hand for you to shake, and introduces herself as the doctor of the armed detective agency

your eyes widen and you smile back at her shaking her hand

“ah! you must be yosano-sensei then! ranpo-san and fukuzawa-san have talked about you! it’s so nice to meet you! im (l/n) (y/n)!”

“they’ve talked about you too, it’s a pleasure to finally meet you (y/n)”

after that exchange she insisted on bringing you home to treat you wounds which you told her it wasn’t necessary

she gave you a pointed look and that was when you realized what state you were in

you sighed and weakly gave in to which she only grinned at

before leaving the alley she walks over to the unconscious man and pulls out his wallet for some sort of identification and home address as you try to see if there’s any groceries still salvageable

after texting the details to kunikida, yosano turns to you poking around the now ruined grocery bags

she simply rubs your back and tells you that the both of you could go buy more groceries together as she was meaning to get some anyways; she even said she’ll pay for you

you refused obviously but she, unknowingly, used the same tactic fukuzawa used with you

“so you’re saying you don’t need groceries?”

“...”

*cue an eyebrow raise from our resident queen*

“...you agency members don’t like making things easy for me huh.”

you gave in reluctantly and at this point you don’t even know why you try negotiating with them

and that’s only three of them

apparently, she was on the other side of the street on the way to buy groceries for the agency when she noticed different produce items on the other sidewalk leading to the alley and she went to check out what happened

ironically, the way to the grocery store from the agency makes you go past Sakura’s but she didn’t realize it until after the two of you had met

before you know it, the two of you are in your apartment kitchen as she cleans and patches up all of your wounds

as she does so the two of you have a little girl talk

you find it quite comforting bc since you opened up Sakura’s you haven’t really had the chance to connect to many people much less other women

you definitely see yosano as your cool, loving, badass older sister

she thinks you’re adorable and agrees with ranpo’s opinion

yup 

that’s right

the opinion that you’re like a little kid </3

you called it a betrayal and all she did was laugh at you <//3

“awhh that’s really cool yosano-sensei!—MFPH?!?”

*squishing your cheeks the same way ranpo did* “ranpo-san was right (n/n)-chan, your cheeks are squishy!”

“?!”

after that small fiasco, the two of you talked some more and bonded over your love for flowers, japanese sweets, and much more!!

you even made a date to have a girls day to go shopping and eat out!

you’re internally squealing a bit bc it’s been a while since you’ve gone shopping

yosano notices and she giggles behind her hand not saying anything bc she knows you’ll only throw a fit

the two of you came around the topic of ranpo when lucky passed by

lucky quickly warmed up to the doctor and cozied up in her lap

“i wish ranpo-san was able to meet lucky when he came by the first time, but then again, he’d probably throw a tantrum if i don’t pay attention to him for 5 seconds”

she snorted at that and like fukuzawa, she shared stories abt the slightly older male

“ranpo-san doesn’t know how to ride a train?”

“unbelievable right?”

“for someone so intelligent i expected more from him”

“i’ll be telling that to ranpo-san, (n/n)-chan”

“wha—?! yosano-sensei please don’t!”

like ranpo, she’s also a tease </3

but you love her anyway <3

eventually, she finished patching you up and promised to treat you to a new set of clothes when the two of you go out

“you don’t need to lose a good set of clothes just because of a sleazy man (n/n)-chan! you deserve better!”

you were going to argue that the rips in your clothes were fairly small and could easily be fixed—except the tights—but you stopped in your tracks when you remembered that it was practically useless to argue against an ada member

the two of you walked to the grocery store and bought both of your needed supplies—along with some extra goodies—and then she walked you back to your place bc it was already a bit dark out

but even if it wasn’t, she would walk you anyways

besides, if anything happened to you, she’s 1000% positive that ranpo and fukuzawa are gonna flip the fuck out not that she wont cause she most definitely will

speaking of which

you were drinking a bottle of water as the two of made your way back to Sakura’s when all of a sudden

“(y/n) you do realize that i have to tell shachou and ranpo-san about what happened today right?”

you choked on your water

“yosano-sensei you can’t! if you do they’ll freak! they won’t leave me alone for at least two weeks! one if im lucky!”

“exactly the point”

you just accepted your defeat already knowing that you’d lose

but maybe you can simmer down their anger towards the bastard with sweets and lucky

you arrived at Sakura’s shortly after and after bringing groceries in, you packaged a bunch of pastries leftover from today—bc you closed early—and bc you’re well aware that ranpo doesn’t share any of the sweets you send him with

you even gave yosano her own special box filled with goodies she loves, and a thermos of fukuzawa’s favorite, your special hot honey lemon tea

other than the sweets, you prepared lucky to spend the night at fukuzawa’s

you really really hoped that doing these things would make them calm down

you shivered at the thought of what their responses would be

you felt really bad for giving yosano all these things to carry and that you were keeping her very late

she assured you that she was fine and that if someone tried to mess with her she’d kick their ass

and after exchanging numbers, the magenta eyed queen bid you a good night and walked back to the agency with lucky walking by her heels

arriving back at the agency, yosano was greeted with some concerns asking if she was alright bc she came back from her grocery run pretty late

(she usually goes in the mornings but today was pretty busy so she left in the late afternoon but now it was already dark)

she waved off the concerns and plopped a couple boxes of your signature bakery boxes at ranpo’s desk, the one for her at her own, the last few boxes in the kitchen for any other agent or clerk to grab, placed the thermos on the desk fukuzawa was by, and picked up lucky and handed him to the president

the two males were pleased with what yosano had brought them, and pleased that another agency member had the chance to meet you

fukuzawa was rubbing lucky and ranpo already snacking on treats as yosano expected

but here comes the hard part

or maybe it’s gonna amusing who knows

“i met (y/n) today.”

“we could tell.”

in goes another treat in the green eyed man’s mouth

“would you like to know how?”

“you bumped into each other, had girl talk, made plans to go out, went grocery shopping, and you brought me and shachou presents.”

“great job ranpo-san, you’re almost completely correct.”

this caught the attention of basically everyone bc they knew ranpo was never “almost completely correct”

“we ended up meeting bc she got attacked on her way home from grocery shopping, i treated her wounds, then we had girl talk and did all the other stuff”

ranpo and fukuzawa froze right in their tracks

“i sent all the info of the bastard to kunikida”

“kunikida.”

“yes shachou”

“find out everything about that man and bring it to me and ranpo”

“...yes shachou”

“and yosano”

“yes?”

“text (y/n) and tell her that her cat, tea, and pastries aren’t going to work as a bribe”

just as you finished taking a shower you sneezed

<<previous // next >>

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taglist: @hanniejji​ @timeless-tales46​ @realitycanbeajerk (i didn’t know if you wanted to be in the tag list or not but i tried anyway :)

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[sukirichi]

heeeey do you have any advice for newbie writers?

writing advice for newbies!

disclaimer: the advice i’m going to give (funnily enough) is not something that i always personally do. i’ve been writing both fiction and non-fiction for years, i only came to tumblr because i wasn’t satisfied with how i kept pressuring myself to write “high literature” after gaining awards and recognition for my stories. my fanfiction here in this blog...it’s unrefined, definitely not what i used to write before because i’m a lot less serious about it and i’m just writing freely. but the advice i’ll list below is personally some stuff that has helped me a lot in my entire writing journey! Some are technical, some are personal! down below will also list some tumblr related writing advice! 

1. Keep writing! No one is born a great writer. Before I actually started publishing/posting my stories, I remember I spent at least five years writing the most random crap just so I can get a feel for what my style is. Plus, the more you do things repeatedly, it’ll come eventually like second nature to you and you’ll find the words are flowing. Keep writing, keep writing, keep writing! Even if you’re not satisfied with your first work, that’s okay, just keep going on!

2. Be mindful of what tense you’re using. NOW I KNOW I DON’T REALLY FOLLOW THIS BUT THAT’S BECAUSE I DON’T EDIT MY FICS LMAO, but you could totally do this! So in writing, we have “voices.” The narration will always use tenses of whether the entire story will be past tense or present tense and it’s important this remains consistent in your entire story. This one is TECHNICAL, this just help improves the flow and formality of your story. As for me though, I don’t really care about the tenses anymore because like I said, I just write freely with no regards for “creative writing techniques.” an example of past tense is: Suki jumped to Naoya’s arms. “My love!” she called, wrapping her arms around him. (RIP EXAMPLES) and present tense is: Suki jumps to Naoya’s arms. “My love!” she calls and wraps her arms around him. (this could be real flexible tho, this is just an example ehehehe)

3. Be mindful of dialogue tags! There’s a huge difference between putting periods and commas after dialogues. Like for example, “Suki loves Naoya,” she declared. If it’s followed by an action, the comma is best. Or example, Suki said, “I really love Naoya.” If the statement can stand alone, then it can be “Suki really loves Naoya./I really love Naoya.” There’s better explanations here! And one more thing, you should put the commas/periods inside the quotation marks. There’s more variations/explanations here but generally, this way of writing,,,example: “Suki really loves Naoya”, LIKE??? if it’s a dialogue, put the commas/periods inside the quotation marks.

4. PARAGRAPH BREAKS. I cannot stress this enough. There should be a variety in the sizes of your paragraphs. Long paragraphs should be followed by smaller ones, varied with medium paragraphs and then so and so forth. There’s no formal sequence that it should be LONG – MEDIUM – SHORT – MEDIUM – LONG, writing is flexible, just make sure you’re varying the lengths because reading long, chunky paragraphs with no end is equally annoying as reading paragraphs that are always 1-2 sentences and then a paragraph break.

5. Outline, outline, outline! Whether it’s long fics or short ones (excluding drabbles, I don’t think you need them that much) outlines will help you have a more solid feel of your story, and you can easily track your story flow when you have your ideas plotted out. or me, my outlines is in the form of Dialogue Outline, where I write out all the dialogues first so my pages will be just conversations then I’ll add the monologues/actions later. That’s personally what works for me, you can discover your own writing style <3

6. Research! Now this is pretty funny for me to say this because I don’t really do research, at least not the “how to effectively write this type of role” or whatever. Of course it’s better if you try to learn more about the concept you’re going to write about (like if you wanna do a vampire AU then read Twiligh – JK THAT’S A BAD REFERENCE, SORRY NOT SORRY, love the memes tho!) or you can do my own way of researching, which is reading other people’s fanfics! Not only do you get a vibe of how this character is like, but you also get to support other content creators!

7. You don’t need verbs all the time. Sometimes I see stories wherein ALL dialogues have “said” “screamed” “explained” on EACH line and here’s the key: as long as the readers can understand which character is speaking, you don’t need dialogue cues all the time. 

8. PUT THE KEEP READING TAB. I cannot stress this enough, but please put the keep reading tab. Drabbles are fine without them, but if it exceeds maybe 400 words then you’re going to need that. Sure, it’s easy to scroll past a long text, but some fics are super long and without the keep reading tab that it can be quite a hassle to whoever sees it.

9. Have your own writing safe space. Now this could be more personal than technical, but I absolutely cannot write or focus when I’m in a public space or when I’m being bothered. So if you want to write, SHUT THE WORLD OUT and dive deep into your imaginations, let the noise of your fantasies be louder than distractions.

10. Take your time! I guess that would be my best advice. You don’t have to rush anything at all, and one more thing, DO NOT OVERTHINK! Maybe this is just me but I honestly don’t really try to dive too deep in the technicalities anymore :// I’ve been in Creative Writing class for years and it stressed me out that my writing teachers always told me “not to use big words because no one will understand that” or “don’t try to paint the picture too clearly because not everyone has that big of an imagination” and I was like ISN’T THAT THE POINT THOUGH, TO MAKE PEOPLE IMAGINE THINGS? but yeah anyways, maybe this is just me again, but I find that I write better when I’m not overthinking too much on how to write a “perfect” story. I don’t always have the prettiest words to use. I don’t always have the most intricate plot. I don’t always have the most poetic content that is “inspiring” or “moving.” Sometimes I write stupid shit that has no plot at all, and that’s okay. Just write whatever you want tbh, I’d say my biggest advice is to not worry too much about having the “perfect” story. It’s still great to do research and want to improve your writing skills, but hmm...I guess I’d say the most important thing is that you enjoy what you do!

11. “There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.” – Ernest Hemingway. This is one of my favourite quotes because it’s true, writing is both complicated and simple, but as for me, writing is something that I don’t want to stress too much about. There isn’t really an actual right or wrong, there isn’t a law, just some techniques that could help you improve, but at the end of the day, it should be about the steady state of progress or the “creation flow” that matters the most. Just write, that’s it. You’ll get there eventually and you’ll start creating magic before you know it. Just let the words flow and build, worry about quality later when you edit it. Or you know, if you’re lazy like me, just post it when you’re done LMAO. really though the BEST advice is to enjoy the process and not stress too much about it!

here is a previous ask i answered that may be of help too! 

[love-fireflysong]

It be June 3rd now, and would you look at that, the second of my prompts is already up! Who’d a thunk it? Anyway, as successfully guessed by the lovely @torahime here is 5 + 1! And as by the nature of this trope in general, this one ended up long. Like crazy loooooooong. (Also I’m a moron who didn’t understand what the prompt meant for like a week. I kept trying to figure out what the hell the number six had to do with anything, and when I finally googled it out of desperation, all I saw were the words ‘five times’ in the first link and I immediately felt ashamed of myself. I should have known. Why didn’t I know?)

Anyways, you can read the long-ass fic in question at ao3 over here: Do You Ever Wonder What Could Have Been? You can also read this one under the cut, but considering the length I wouldn’t recommend it asdhaskdjh The next one should be much shorter due to the fact that like the first one, I blanked for ideas completely lol.

Do You Ever Wonder What Could Have Been?

Trope: 5 + 1 Fandom: Until Dawn Characters: Ashley Brown, Chris Hartley, Josh Washington (all the other kids also make an appearance but due to them only having like one scene and a single line each I’m not tagging them) Words: 12733 Rating: Teen (though I think I’m being pretty damn generous with that rating tbh) Authors Notes: Yes you’re reading that word count right. Almost thirteen thousand words. Don’t ask how I managed to write this in 5 days, I have no fucking idea. Just take this fic about two nerds being morons in love and mutually pining over each other for six. fucking. years.

Chris is fourteen and so goddamn tired of this stupid crush on his best friend. It's been a whole year now since he met her, and he hates that this stupid, silly, little, crush of his hasn't abated at all. He doesn't even know why he likes her in the first place! It's just Ashley after all, there is absolutely no reason to feel this tongue-tied around his best friend. It's Ash: with her braces, arms always full books (when her head wasn't buried in one that is), stringy red hair, wide green eyes, who sometimes snorts when he tells a joke, freckles that dot her nose and shoulders and—

Okay, he was maybe getting a little side-tracked here. The point was, there was 100% absolutely no reason to feel this way about her. In fact, he bets this was all Josh's fault in the first place! Yeah! That was it! None of this would be happening if Josh hadn't basically kidnapped Ashley from her true home in the library and forced him to meet her! 

...But then he wouldn't have met her. And stupid crush aside, she is pretty much the only girl he knows who laughs at all his jokes and helps him with his English homework sometimes. He likes knowing her and likes being her friend even more, he just doesn't like liking her. And maybe that was it? Maybe he just likes Ashley cause she's the only girl who willingly hangs out with him and Josh, and isn't Josh's sisters. 

And that's what he's going to prove today once and for all. He heard from Josh that Hannah was absolutely adamant that everyone was going to play spin-the-bottle at her and Beth's birthday party in a couple of days. And that everyone meant not only the people that the twins invited for said party, but also the people that Josh invited over (ie: Chris and Ash) so he would have some company during the twins big b-day bash. Chris was going to find Ashley and explain that losing their first kiss over a game like spin-the-bottle was just so not cool, and that maybe kissing each other first would just be a way better and smarter idea of doing things. And once he kissed her he would finally realize that yup, Ash was just one of the guys and that was so fucking gross and they were totally never ever going to do that again.

Perfect idea. Fool proof even. No way that this was totally going to backfire into his face. Absolutely none at all!

So when he finds Ashley sitting and reading under her usual tree just outside of the school, he is so sure of the success of his ingenious plan that he brings it up right away. 

"I think we should kiss before Hannah and Beth's party."

See! Right away! Straight to the point. He has got this shit in the bag baby!

Ashley looks up at him, clearly a little startled from reading her book and squints at him. "Huh? Chris? Is that you?" For a second he's a little confused about how Ash doesn't even recognize him, but then he quickly realizes that he's probably got the sun directly at his back so she can't see him clearly and he awkwardly shuffles to the left a little so she can see him better. "Oh! Hey Chris, what was that you said earlier? I got so absorbed that I didn't really hear a thing you said, sorry." While she doesn't close her book, she does give an embarrassed little laugh that makes his stomach flip-flop just a little and starts to weaken at the cracks of his once fool-proof plan.

He finds himself messing with the strap on his bookbag as he tries to ignore the butterflies fluttering around in his stomach. 'Um, I asked if you were going to the twins' birthday party this weekend." Okay, falling a little behind schedule now, but it's fine. No problem.

"I mean, I wasn't exactly invited, but yeah. A whole night of graphic horror movies to drown out the sounds of screaming pre-teens. I honestly can't think of a better way to spend a Saturday night." The absolute dryness of her tone has Chris smiling.

"Oh come on Ash, it's not gonna be that bad."

"Our choices are either to hang out with a bunch of kids who have basically never talked to us ever, or watch Josh's disgusting horror movies Chris."

"Well, I mean, when you put it that way...actually, no. The screaming pre-teens sound like a safer bet honestly." The little snort of laughter she lets out only has Chris pushing the butterflies down harder. God, he is going to be so glad when those stupid things finally leave him alone. "And well, from what Josh said, it sounds like horror isn't the only thing planned for that evening."

"It isn't? You mean he's actually opening up to other movie genre options? Shocking. I truly never thought I would see the day."

"Ha, I wish. Nah, I was, um, talking about what the girls—well, what Hannah wanted to play. Actually." Great. And now he's starting to blush. Really keeping with the rails of his plan there!

"What Hannah...? Oh! You're, uh, talking about the spin-the-bottle game." Ashley brings her lower lip into her mouth and pushes some hair behind her ear. "Yeah, Josh mentioned something about that."

Perfect, one less thing he had to explain. That would speed things up immensely. "Honestly, between you and me? I think it's a stupid idea."

Ashley nods her head vigorously in agreement. "I know right! I mean, who wants to kiss some stranger over a bottle of all things? Can you imagine losing your first kiss to some person who probably doesn't have a single idea who you are in the first place? God that would be awful." Oh man, things are lining up right for him! Ashley's even on the same page and this next part is going to be so easy— "That's why I asked Josh if I could kiss him first instead when he told me a couple of days ago."

Wait. Waitwaitwait wait . She already asked Josh?! "Oh, wow. You were, uh, really thinking ahead there huh?" God, he could feel every ounce of determination he had slowly deflating out of his body. There was no way he could ask her now, absolutely no way! Ashley was gonna think that Chris wanted to kiss her—or worse, liked her! And okay he kind of did, but this was supposed to prove the exact opposite. That this was just stupid hormones and puberty really messing with his life and not something else.

"Of course, there was absolutely no way I was gonna have my first kiss with some popular buttface who was just gonna make fun of me behind my back afterwards. Better to have it with Josh, who would also make fun of me, but at least it would be to my face." Ashley starts to return to her book, flipping a page but stops halfway through. "Wait. Were you going to ask me the same thing?" She sounds a little unsure and a little of something else he can't place right now because he's too busy trying not to panic. 

"What? No! God no! Of-of course not!" Oh god, was his voice seriously choosing to crack now? He really, really hoped that the shade being cast from the tree was enough to hide how red his face was. He needed to get out of here and quick .

"I-I-I mean, it's not like it was good or anything—"

"Think I should probably go now anyway."

"It was, like, really wet and-and-and like so bad. Super awkward honestly."

"Lots of things to do. Lots and lots of things to do in fact!"

"I mean, we could still, uh, k-k-kiss? If you want to...?"

"Nope!" Chris was honestly looking everywhere except at Ashley right now, which was fine because she was currently in the middle of trying to hide behind her book. "There's absolutely no reason to do that. Because, because... I already kissed Josh too!"

"...you did?"

"Yup! Totally did. Just came over to see what you had planned to do about it actually. And because you're so much smarter than me, you had totally already done the same thing. So no reason for me to still bother you after all! None whatsoever! So I'll just let you get back to your book. And the battle between the uh, vampire and the, um, cowboy? Riveting stuff I bet."

"Um, yeah. But—"

"I'll just, uh, see you tomorrow then, I guess. Bye!"

Chris thinks he catches a wave of disappointment flash across her face when she returns his farewell, but he's already basically fled half away across the yard to find Josh so he doesn't think about it too much. And it turns out that Ashley is right, kissing Josh is wet and pretty fucking awful in the end. Which should only prove his idea that kissing her would have been just as bad and awkward.

So why does he feel like it would have actually been the complete opposite?

"I'm going to fail."

Ashley rolled her eyes as she struggled not to laugh. "Oh my god, you're not gonna fail Chris."

Chris didn't even deign to raise his head from where he had face-planted it into the open book only moments before, letting his words come out muffled and flat. "I am Ash. I am going to bomb this exam so hard that they're gonna make me repeat ninth grade."

Ashley groaned, but it was more of an attempt to hide her amusement than out of any exasperation, as she tried to lift Chris back into a sitting position and wasn't laid out prostrated over the table. "Okay first of all, get your dumb face out of that book. Ms. Norman is not gonna be happy with either of us if she discovers your drool all over the pages of the only half-decent copy of Lord of the Flies that the school library has." Once she finally has finally managed to prop Chris into a halfway decent sitting position, she moves the book closer to her in case he decides to try smashing his face into it again. "Second of all, I'm pretty sure that the school's not going to make you repeat the grade just because you failed English, your grades in everything else are high enough that they'll definitely pass you. That, and there is no way that the teachers would let Josh move on to high school of all things without supervision."

"...That is a scarily good point."

"And thirdly, there is absolutely no way I would be able to get through the next four years of school with you in my grade," she teases him with a poke in the arm. "I mean can you imagine? Having to go to class everyday knowing you're going to be there with me? I can't think of anything more terrifying honestly."

Chris gives a startled laugh. "Gee, thanks Ash. Really appreciate that vote of confidence. Making my self-esteem soar over here. And also, I for one can think of something way more terrifying."

"Really?" Ashley says as she crosses her arms across her chest and levels him with a disbelieving look. "Well go on then, try me. Cause I can promise you that there is absolutely nothing more terrifying—"

"Me and Josh in the same grade as you."

Ashley just blanches. "Oh god. You're right. That is so much worse and the idea of this even happening is now going to give me nightmares for the rest of my life."

"Oh please, it wouldn't be that bad."

"It would. It so would. And to prevent this we need to double down on you studying for your English final so that this cataclysmic event never occurs."

It's Chris's turn to roll his eyes as he slumps down even further into his seat. "That's what I was doing earlier until you stopped me."

"What? Planting your face into the middle of the book?"

"Exactly. Decided to try out a new method cause the other one wasn't certainly working. Learning by osmosis."

Ashley shoves her face into the palms of her hands to try and stop her giggles. It didn't work, not by a long shot, but it at least smothered them a bit. "You can't just read a book by trying to absorb it into your skin, that's not how things work at all!"

"And how would you know that Ash? Have you ever even tried?" Chris scoffs.

"Of course I haven't you dork! I haven't tried because that's not even possible!"

 "Um, sounds to me like someone just isn't open to new ideas."

"Oh my god. Can we please get back to studying and making sure you don't fail. I for one would really like to get back to that." Ashley starts to put the copy of the book back between the middle of them where they can both read it easily. "Okay, so chapter eight is where the divide between the boys finally reaches a boiling point after seeing the 'monster' on the mountain in the last chapter. They argue over whether Ralph should still be left in charge and Jack leaves in a huff."

Chris groaned as he tossed his glasses onto the table so he could throw his arm over his eyes. "Starting to think that Jack has the right idea here." he grumbled.

Ashley ignored him. "Some of the other boys follow after him and form their own tribe with Jack as its chief further down the beach. As a group, the hunters then fall into a savage frenzy when they go hunting and kill a sow, with Roger dealing the killing blow."

"By driving his spear into the thing’s ass," Chris helpfully supplied.

Ashley sighed. "Yes, by doing that. Good to know you're at least remembering some things, but do you remember what happened next?"

Though she couldn't see with Chris's arm in the way, she knew that he was narrowing his eyes in concentration. "Ummm, they... eat the pig?"

Ashley groaned and fought very hard against the impulse to smack her forehead into the center of the table. " Chris . "

"What? Do they not eat the thing? I mean, why even hunt it if they're not gonna eat it?"

"Chris, what they do next is the lead up for what is often considered the most important scene in the entire book! How can you not remember?!"

"I don't know Ash! Kind of think I was distracted by the whole 'shoving a spear into a sow's anus' part!"

"They leave its head on a stake in the jungle as an offering to the beast! This is what creates the Lord of the Flies that Simon sees later that night!"

"Oh right, that. Yeah that sounds a little familiar now that you mention it."

"A little—" Ashley stops fighting against the earlier urge and places her heavy head into her hands in despair. "You literally had to read this book last month! How could you have forgotten so much already?"

Chris groans and drapes himself over the back of his chair. "This is hopeless Ash. I appreciate the help I really do, but I think it's time we face the inevitable and just take a page out of this book."

"What, I stick your head on a pike and be done with you?"

The snort that Chris makes in surprise is enough to bring a tired smile to Ashley's face. "Leaving you to deal with Josh alone? Ha, you wouldn't. Nah, I was talking about just making an offering to the exam gods out there. Think they'll be the best bet I have to pass this shitty ass final."

Ashley removes her head from her hands to give him a withering look. "If we're going that route, you want a kiss for good luck too? Probably work just as well as those gods of yours."

There's an awkward pause, and at first Ashley can't figure out why but then the words finally hit her. She feels her face start to burn and she places her head back into her hands so she doesn't have to look at Chris anymore. Oh god, she can't believe she just said that. Why would she even say that in the first place?! It's a damn good thing that Chris isn't wearing his glasses right now, the heat from her face alone is making her feel like she's about to combust as it is, and him seeing that would probably push her over that physical boundary.

"I-I mean, if you think it will help..." Chris sounds almost bashful when he says it and Ashley snaps her head to him in shock.

"I—" Ashley isn't quite sure what she's trying to say, and is interrupted when her phone buzzes with an incoming text message. She immediately jumps up from her chair and starts grabbing at her things. "Oh man, that's probably my mom here to pick me up. I should really get going."

"Uh, yeah. Yeah! No reason for me to stay if you aren't so I guess I should head out too." Chris starts picking up his stuff too, putting his glasses back onto his face as he shoves his books into his bag.

By nature of having brought less than Chris to help him study, Ashley finishes cleaning first but doesn't leave right away. Chris had said it was fine after all. And sure, maybe he was just desperate for anything that will help him pass his final, but he said it would be fine. So steeling herself, Ashley leans down and leaves a quick but chaste kiss on Chris's cheek.

"For luck!" She manages to squeak out as she all but runs out the doors of the library to the school's entrance where her mom will be waiting for her, too scared to even look back. 

Chris should have known that something was up the moment Josh brought it up: 'Hey, how about you and Ash hang out at my house this weekend instead?' Innocent sounding sure, but he really, really should have known better. Josh never pushed for hang outs at his place, it had always been an agreed upon rule that Hannah and Beth got their place, while Josh preferred to host their get togethers and his and Ash's own houses. It was just the thing that was done and everyone had been more than happy with how it was. Had it been any other time, Chris would like to think that he would have totally seen right through Josh's plan and offered up his place instead.

But Josh's parents were almost never around either, and that meant staying up late and talking and goofing around without parents warning them to go to sleep. Which most importantly meant staying up late and talking to Ashley, because that hadn't been a thing that the three of them had been able to do a whole lot recently. It was still so weird not seeing Ash around in the school halls, not being able to hang out at lunch, and not meeting up after school all the time. It felt like there was something huge missing and it bothered him (just as much as it bothered Josh, not that he would ever say anything about it). The two of them wandering the hallowed halls of high school while she was still stuck back in their middle school just felt so wrong .

So when Josh had brought up a weekend hang out, Chris (and Ashley) had accepted right away. Which, judging from the fact that Josh had somehow managed to weasel the two of them into playing a game of Truth or Dare with him, had been a huge mistake.

"Well, well, well. It seems the time has come. So let's get on with it shall we?" Josh rubbed his hands gleefully together in the dim light of the bedroom (for atmosphere he had claimed) as the three of them sat in a circle. A seemingly innocuous plate of cookies sitting in the middle of them, and knowing better then to trust Josh, both Chris and Ash had been eyeing the cookies warily for the past few minutes. Not that Josh seemed to notice or care of course. "Seeing as I'm the one who set up elegant little ritual—"

"You forced us into playing a stupid game dude, there's nothing elegant or ritualistic about it."

Josh ignored him, unsurprisingly. "I'll go first of course. So Ash, truth or dare?"

"What are the cookies for Josh?" Ashley asked nervously as she continued to eye the plate instead of answering him.

"That's not important. And anyways, it's my turn Ash. So I'll ask again: truth or dare Ashley?"

Ashley raised her eyes from the plate to transfer her nervous and mistrustful stare to him. "...truth," she answered slowly.

"Oh ho ho! So truth it is! Well then Ash, tell me: have you got any secrets you've been dying to share with us?"

Chris could immediately tell that the question had hit a sore spot on some sort, shoulders locked and her body stiff. "You know I'm not gonna answer that one. Pass."

Josh shook his head, a devious smile on his lips. "Nope. Nuh uh Miss Brown. That's not how this game works. If you're gonna pass then I'm gonna have to ask that you take a cookie in return."

"...I'm sorry, what? "

He waved a hand down towards the plate of cookies. "These, my dearest chums, are the fabled Truth or Dare cookies. Anytime one of us refuses to act out what is asked of us, we must then take a cookie in penance."

At first, Ashley doesn't move. She continues to dart her eyes suspiciously between Josh and the plate of cookies, but eventually slowly does reach out and hesitantly grab a chocolate cookie from the plate. She holds it up closer to her face to investigate it further, and Chris watches as all the tension she had stored up just evaporates from her as she physically deflates. "Oh my god, are you actually being serious right now Josh? ‘Dare’ brand cookies? Really? Why in the world are you trying to be so ominous when you went with a pun as lame as using Dare cookies in a game of truth or dare?"

"Wait, really?" Chris reaches out to grab one for himself but Josh smacks his hand away with a grin. 

"So sorry Cochise, but these are only for if you refuse. And trust me, you don't want to refuse." Josh turns back to Ashley. "Oh, and don't eat that just yet." 

In response, she just shrugs and leans back, but keeps the chocolate crème filled cookie in her hand as she looks between Chris and Josh. "It's my turn now, right? Okay, so—"

Josh cuts her off. "Nope, still mine. Now, Chris—"

"What? That's not how this stupid game works Josh!"

Josh waves her off. "You didn't answer my question Ash, or eat the cookie, so it's still my turn."

"But you just told me not to eat the stupid thing!"

Josh ignores her as he keeps his attention squarely on Chris. Who, to his own shame, has begun squirming in his seat in dread of what's going to come. "Well, Chris: truth or dare?"

Chris tosses the options over in his head. Both are terrible obviously, but playing this game with Josh of all people never ends well, so he decides to go with his gut instead. "Dare."

"Ooooh, feeling a little gutsy are we? That's fine, I can work with that. I dare you to... return the favour and do one thing you've been thinking about alllllllll summer."

Personally, Chris is finding it a miracle that he hasn't reached over and tried to strangle Josh yet, but he has a feeling that has more to do with the fact that he's trying not to shrivel up on the floor and die than out of any mercy. Even though Josh for some reason worded it in a really convoluted way, he just literally dared him to kiss Ash. It was so obvious that he was frankly amazed that Ashley hadn't figured it out yet.

Because of course he still thought about that kiss for good luck that Ash had given him in the library. He thought about it nearly all the damn time! Hell, Chris was pretty sure that the reason he had even passed his final even a little bit was because of the kiss. Not because it was good luck or anything, but because whenever a question appeared on the exam that asked about the themes or some shit about Lord of the Flies, he kept getting sent back into that library where Ashley had been drilling the same stuff into him just before she had kissed his cheek.

And there is absolutely no way that he's gonna kiss Ash in Josh's bedroom. No way in hell. Especially not when it's gonna reveal that he had been thinking about what was more than likely a super innocent and helpful gesture on her part.

So glaring at Josh, Chris reaches forward and without a word grabs a vanilla cookie. And for some strange reason, this only causes Josh's smile to widen. "I see, so that's what you both went with huh? Anyways, I think it's about time you take your 'reward' and chow down!"

Exchanging a confused look with Ashley, Chris nonetheless shrugs and pops the entire thing into his mouth and bites down.

And realizes in a horrifying instant that this is not a vanilla cookie.

There's a flash of light that blinds him for a second, and when the spots clear he sees Josh holding a camera and laughing his ass off.

"What the—? Is this fucking mayo dude?!" And it must be, because this is not what a vanilla cookie should ever taste like. While the cookie portion itself is okay if not a little soft, the crème is way too oily and eggy to be anything but mayo. Josh doesn't answer his question right away, but that's from a combo of laughing way too hard and being distracted by Ash trying not to retch in the middle of the bedroom floor.

"Oh my god! You put soy sauce in a cookie?! What is wrong with you Josh?!" She's up in a second and rushing to the garbage can near Josh's desk, and Chris is quick to join her in trying to spit everything out. "I'm never going to get this salt out of my mouth! Why would you even do that?!"

"Cause it's fucking hilarious that's why!" Josh is still laughing as he takes a look at the picture he took on the camera, and starts laughing harder. "Oh fucking hell, this was glorious. Oh wasting those two questions just for this picture was so worth it. Best decision I could have made!

"Now you two get your asses back over here! I spent hours on these cookies after all, and I am not letting them go to waste. We've got hours my friends, and so many questions and dares to get through."

Chris shares a look with Ashley over the garbage bin, both of them now obviously wondering if keeping their own secret had been worth having to eat those cookies, and if they still would have passed their turn knowing what exactly laid in store for them. While he certainly couldn't say a thing about her, Chris wasn't so sure if not kissing Ash and enduring all the fallout that would have resulted in was worth the terrible combination of vanilla and mayo in his mouth. He supposed he would never know, it was too late to simply retract his pass after all.

And well, he really didn't want to kiss Ash when she had just been tricked into eating a bunch of soy sauce.

You know, Ashley kind of figured that once she entered high school all of these stupid games would be done with. Surely high schoolers were too mature and too old to be playing childish games like spin-the-bottle or seven minutes in heaven? And yeah, obviously Chris and Josh weren't, but that was them and they were in a class all their own. But Hannah? And Sam and Beth? She would have thought that they were way too cool to be playing spin-the-bottle of all things, especially Beth.

And yet, here Ashley was: squeezed in between Matt and Sam as Matt spun the bottle around on the now extremely sticky hardwood floor. She wasn't stupid, she knew the entire reason the game was even being played in the first place; Hannah had been making eyes at Mike all through the evening and well into the game after all. She just didn't think that anyone else would have been stupid enough to go along with the game when Hannah suggested it. 

(Ashley knew very well why she had reluctantly agreed to play, she just didn't know why anyone else did.)

Though to be fair, it didn't seem like the game was gonna last much longer anyway. Emily and Jess had started scrolling through their phones ages ago, showing each other whatever was on the other's screen every few minutes and the two of them laughing. Mike had been tapping a really off-rhythm beat on his jeans with the straw from his can of soda and staring into space, while Hannah stared lovesick at him . Beth was starting to doze on Sam's shoulder, not that either seemed too concerned about it, and Sam was nervously eyeing all the spilt pop and chips around them that they were gonna have to clean up before they went to bed. Unsurprisingly, Chris was also scrolling through his phone, snickering every now and then as Ashley felt her phone buzz in the pocket of her hoodie whenever he sent whatever it was that he found funny to her and Josh. Josh meanwhile, had joined Matt in building a rather shaky—if not impressive—tower out of discarded plastic cups, straws, and paper plates.

Ashley yawned behind her hand as the bottle slowed it's spin. She had been ready to drop out of the game a round or two back, but hadn't yet because she didn't want to deal with the others teasing her on being a sore loser who backs down the moment the bottle didn't land on the person she wanted it to. Which would lead to Chris asking who it was even though everyone else already knew who because it was glaringly obvious to everyone except him. The sound of the bottle stopping its spin managed to get everyone's attention as they looked at the neck of the bottle pointed squarely at Mike. 

Everyone made the expected ' oooooooh ' and wolf whistles that everyone always did in this game, though quieter than they might have usually. Bob and Melinda were sleeping upstairs after all, and the last thing any of them wanted to do was wake them up and have them discover that despite it being nearly three in the morning, that the ten of them were still awake as the snow storm raged outside the lodge. Nonetheless, Matt and Mike both rolled their eyes and leaned over Josh who sat in the middle of them with a groan. Mike also didn't hesitate to take Matt's face into his hands and just plant one firmly on his mouth with no fanfare, other than the continued wolf whistles of course, and the two of them settled back down to their previous antics. 

With that done, Ashley stared down nervously at the bottle. Once again, she felt the words stick in her throat. It would just be so easy to say "Oh man you guys, it's really late, I should really just go to bed" but let them die without a fight as she swallowed nervously and gave the bottle a hard flick. She knew exactly why she let the words die, and it wasn't solely because of what the others would say, though that was certainly a large part of it. No, it was because of the same glimmer of hope that sparked in her everytime it was her turn at this stupid game. That maybe this would be the time that the bottle would land on Chris, that she would finally get that kiss she's wanted for three years now.

She watches the bottle spin around the group, slowing its motion every full spin, and she notices that Chris has turned his attention away from his phone to watch it almost as nervously as she is. Which should probably make her question just why Chris is as just as invested on who it's gonna land on as she is, but she's kind of distracted right now by the fact that her heart is rapidly picking up pace in direct contrast to how much slower the bottle is getting. And feels it stop almost entirely when the bottle begins its last revolution and she knows. She knows . It's finally gonna land on Chris. All these years of playing this stupid, stupid game and it's finally happening.  

Ashley's eyes shoot up to meet Chris's over the bottle, but that's also when the lodge suddenly plunges into darkness just before the bottle stops on him.

Immediately, the others are screaming next to her and the tower of cups and plates fall with a soft clatter.

"Oh my god! What the fuck was that?!"

"Holy fuck! Can you guys see anything?"

"Of course we can't see anything Michael!"

"It's probably just the storm you guys. Settle down."

"Can you guys please quiet down? My parents are sleeping and they're gonna kill us if they find out we're still awake."

Ashley isn't yelling though, because she's too busy screaming internally. There is no way that this is actually happening right now. There is no goddamn way. The bottle finally lands on Chris and the power goes out? Because of some stupid storm? She wanted to scream. She has half a mind to reach out and hold the bottle in place so there's proof of this when the power comes on, or to just jump over the distance and kiss Chris anyway. She knows exactly where he is after all, and he must have seen it land on him. He must have, right? It's that little second of uncertainty that decides for her, there's a sound as someone gets up and the flat 'thunk' as they accidentally kick the bottle across the room.

"Shit. My bad. You guys stay here, I'll go and check out the back-up generator in the basement. You coming, Cochise?"

Ashley can hear Chris awkwardly and quickly getting to his feet. "Um, y-yeah. Right behind you, bro."

The two of them walk away leaving Ashley to sit on the floor about to scream from the frustration of it all. And she does scream that it is, though not from almost having the perfect excuse to kiss Chris, but from someone touching her shoulder.

"Sorry, sorry!" Sam apologizes. "You were so quiet Ashley that I got nervous. I know that you're scared of the dark and I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

Oh, yeah. That's right. She was so preoccupied with the dark ruining what was almost going to be the highlight of her entire year , that she kind of forgot that it was, well, dark now. And once that realization hits her, so too does the fear that she's sitting in absolute darkness and can't see a single thing other than the lights being cast from everyone’s phones. That she has no idea what else—or who else—is out there. She frantically reaches out and wraps up Sam's arm in her own for a physical reminder that there is someone else she trusts in the darkness with her.

"Wait, you're scared of the dark Ash? Shit. Here, just give me a second." From next to her, Matt rustles in his jacket pocket and brings out his phone, turning it on and casting light around the room, and reflecting off the plastic bottle that Josh had accidentally kicked to the other side of the room. "Hope this helps a bit."

Ashley lets out a breath and a small smile. "Yeah, it does. Thanks Matt."

"No problem. Hey, I think I may have a funny video saved on here somewhere. Pretty sure I downloaded it so just give me a moment." He finds the video quickly enough, and while Ashley doesn't find it particularly as funny as he clearly did, she does appreciate the effort anyway.

Thankfully for everyone, the lights come back on soon enough. Though whether from the power coming back or the back-up generator activating, she isn't sure. It is enough to convince everyone that maybe it's time for bed though, and no one asks about her spin and who it landed on, which Ashley is both insulted for and thankful of in equal measure. Sam unfortunately reminds everyone of the mess they've all made of the great room though, and that they should all clean it up before Bob and Melinda wake up and find it, which Hannah and Beth eagerly echo, and so does Josh when he makes his way back up from the basement with scowling Chris in tow.

Thankfully, between the ten of them, the clean up takes very little time and they're all on their way back to their own rooms in record time, even if Ashley was too embarrassed to even look at Chris now. God, she couldn't believe that she had seriously considered jumping him! And for what? Just because some bottle told her to? Oh man, she never would have been able to live that down. She still spends more time then needed to get ready in the bathroom, and then laying in bed with her lamp on in the hopes that maybe Chris will knock on her door to confront her about the spin and ask for that kiss.

While the fact that he doesn't make an appearance doesn't surprise her, it's still a little depressing. 

Chris is going to kill Josh. He is going to kill him . And he means it this time. Years spent watching Josh's horror shit and listening to Ash go on and on about her mystery novels should have given him a real edge actually. He can murder Josh violently in the way that the weirdo would probably like to go and then Ash can help him get rid of the body so that no one will ever know it was him. Easy.

You know, assuming Ashley is still gonna want to even associate with him after this.

"You feeling okay, Chris? You're starting to look a little red... and surly."

"Yup, I'm fine. Just peachy in fact." Chris takes another swig of the punch that has somehow not been spiked yet, and tries to plaster a smile on his face for her only to once again start looking over her shoulder. Not that there's anything interesting over her shoulder of course, unless one finds a group of football seniors trying to play a game of chicken in the middle of the dance hall interesting, but it's easier than looking straight at her. Not because she looks terrible of course—good god is that not the reason—but because she is way too fucking gorgeous for him to handle right now.

When Chris had decided to invite her to his and Josh's grad thing, it had just been a way for all three of them to hang out and enjoy their last year of high school together. School rules dictated after all that for some stupid reason, graduates weren't allowed to invite anyone who wasn't in school anymore so Ash wasn't going to be able to ask them to hers next year. Which was complete and utter bullshit of course, but that was beside the point. It was supposed to be a fun night... and then Chris's parents found out. And being the complete pain in the asses they are, they insisted that if Ash was going to this party with them, and it was a formal party, then they needed to make this proper. So against his wishes and leaving Chris wanting to die, they went and found out what colour of dress Ash was going to be wearing and got him not only a matching tie but a fucking corsage to go with it! The only thing that had made all of that even a little better, was that they had forced Josh to go along with it so at least he wouldn't be alone. 

But then Josh had showed up not wearing his stupid tie and without the fucking flowers. And despite Chris's repeated protests that he didn't want to do the whole matching thing, especially if Josh wasn't doing it, his parents still made him do it anyway, saying all the while that 'it would make Ashley happy, you do want to make Ashley happy don't you?' And now here he was, sitting with Ashley at their table while she wore his stupid flowers on her wrist and his tie matched her green dress.

He hated how fucking obvious his crush was s0 much.

"...It's because of what everyone's been saying isn't it?"

At the dejected tone of her voice, Chris immediately snaps his full attention to her, leaving his glass of punch forgotten as he flaps his hands around in an effort to not reach out and grab at her hand. "What? No! God no! That isn't it I swear!"

Ashley sighs sadly as she looks glumly down at her lap. "It's fine Chris. I can understand if it's making you uncomfortable."

Chris takes one of his ineffectually flapping hands and makes to run it through his hair, before remembering the amount of gel he had put in it before coming and rubs at his eyes beneath his glasses. "I'm serious Ash, that's not it. I was honestly just thinking about the different ways I'm going to murder Josh when he gets back."

She laughs a little at that, and turns to look out into the direction of the buffet table, as though she'll be able to see Josh coming back with their food through the literal sea of people. "He has been gone a while hasn't he? He left like twenty minutes ago and he still isn't back. Do you think he even went to the buffet table in the first place?"

"He better have. Him coming back with food is probably about the only thing that's going to stop me from murdering him honestly."

Ashley laughs a little louder, and when she pushes a stray strand of hair that had come undone from her simply styled updo, Chris catches the while flowers on her wrist and feels his stomach flip pleasantly. "Any particular reason you want to kill Josh this time?"

"I mean, I have plenty but let's just be honest with ourselves here: do either of us ever need a reason to wanna kill Josh, Ash?"

And there it is, the surprised snort he was waiting for and that just made this entire evening a little more bearable. "God, you're not wrong." She follows his eye line to the corsage on her wrist and just like that all levity to the situation is gone as she hides her hands back in her lap under the table. "...you're sure that you're okay with what everyone is saying though?" she asks a little nervously.

Honestly? No, he isn't. Ever since the three of them walked into the party, everyone they had talked to right away had noticed the matching colours and the corsage and all comments had been the same. 'Fucking knew that there was something going on between you two' and 'Hey, it's about fucking time' or 'Always knew that you two would be good together'. It had been bad enough realizing that apparently almost everyone he had ever spoken to even a little bit had known of his super obvious feelings for his best friend, but the absolute worst thing had been the pained but polite smile that Ash had forced onto her face every single time.

"Honestly, I'm never going to see most of these people ever again once I graduate." He's avoiding the question, and he knows that she knows that he's avoiding the question. "But you're probably gonna have to deal with people brining this stupid thing up for the entire next year. Are you going to be okay?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine. It's not like this is something I don't deal with already." She says it with a little shrug and smile, but Chris can feel his heart sink anyway. How long has she had to deal with the bullshit that his stupid crush has caused her, and why had she never told him? It's way too late to try and fix things, but he can at least hopefully try and stop any further comments from coming, so he lets his fingers fly to his tie and starts to frantically undo it. "...What are you doing Chris?"

"Wondering why on earth I let my parents talk me into this. This is obviously making you uncomfortable and I should have taken this stupid thing off ages ago." His fingers keep catching on the knot and he lets out a fairly explicit curse under his breath.

Ashley's eyes go wide with realization. "Oh!" She instantly flips over her wrist and starts fumbling at the clasp of the corsage with her other hand and Chris finds that his heart has somehow managed to travel all the way from the bottom of his stomach straight into his throat. Abandoning his only partially undone tie, he lays his hand on hers to stop her.

"You don't have to do that." She's staring at their hands in wide-eyed shock, and his breath catches. "Not if you don't want to, that is. It-it looks good on you."

"Okay," she whispers softly, eyes still wide as her fingers leave her wrist, "I can leave it on."

"Only if you want to though." When the hell did his mouth get so dry?!  

"I do," she looks up to him when she says it, and the earnestness of her smile bowls him over. "I really, really do." In an effort to try and distract himself from her smile, he starts fumbling at his tie once again and he catches her eyes flickering to it. Ashley's smile somehow only brightens as she laughs at him. "Here. Let me give you a hand with that."

She scoots her chair closer to him and he removes his hands from his tie so she can take over. The two of them say nothing as she places all of her attention on continuing to loosen the knot, while Chris tries his absolute hardest not to swallow...or breathe...or do anything at all really, as he just stares down at her in awe.

Once the knot is finally undone, Ashley slowly pulls the entire length of fabric from his neck and places it on the table, before putting her hands back where they were so she can carefully smooth out his shirt collar. And when she looks back up at him with a smile, he can feel the entire world stop as they just stare at each other and Chris slowly starts to close the infinitesimally small distance between them. And he's probably just imagining things, but he thinks that she's doing the same thing as well.

"Jesus Christ, sorry it took so long you guys. Line for the fucking food was longer then you would believe!"

The two of them fly apart so fiercely, that Chris's entire chair manages to tip over backwards and send him to the ground with a loud clatter. He can feel everyone's eyes on them and the murmurs that follow, and he hopes that they're mistaking the redness of his face for the embarrassment of falling out of his chair. Yeah, that's a story that's going to make the rounds before he graduates for sure.

"Shit, you okay bro?" From his spot on the floor, Chris watches Josh place a couple of plates absolutely piled high in food on the table and reach down to help him up with a laugh. "Oh hey, I see you finally decided to take off that stupid tie too. Surprised it took you this long honestly."

Chris accepts Josh's hand up. "Yup, me too." He hopes and prays that Josh just thinks that the absolutely breathless and stunted quality to his words is that he's just a little winded from the fall. Once he gets his chair back up and sits back down, he grabs at the tie to shove it in his pocket. He notices that Ashley is refusing to look at him as she digs out a couple of sandwiches from the miscellaneous pile of food, even as she fiddles with the strap of flowers on her wrist for the rest of the meal.

He's exceptionally thrilled to note that she does keep the corsage on the rest of the night though.

Five times. That's how many times her phone has gone off in her pocket. Five. Times. And every single time Ashley lets out a sigh of relief when the buzzing finally stops, it goes off again only seconds later. And checking the caller id the first couple of times only showed that it was Josh calling her. Normally Ashley liked to think that she would have answered her phone if it was literally anyone else, but this was Josh. He called for every little thing after all; from letting her know that he saw a super big dog on the way home from classes to informing her that he was out of chips and if Ash could pick some up on her way to meet them from her job then that would really just be swell. And considering that he and Chris were supposed to meet her and grab a bite to eat together while she was on her lunch break, he was probably just calling to let her know that they had just left, and to make a milestone out of every block closer the two of them got so she could greet them with all the pomp and circumstance he likely thought he deserved. 

Though to be fair she probably would have answered her phone after the third ring, if only to tell him off, but Jared had been giving her a stink eye from his office pretty much since she had arrived so she hadn't.

So she let it buzz...and buzz...and buzz. Until finally, her phone stopped yet again and she tensed her shoulders ready for the next round of vibrations to start. But there was nothing. Nothing but blissful silence coming from her pocket and she let out a huge sigh of relief as Ashley got back to work shelving some of the new stock, letting Kyrstin and Curtis deal with the short line of customers that had begun to form as they bought their books and whatever little trinkets littered the entire front of the store.

She hoped Chris and Josh got here soon, she was overdue for her lunch break and the smells coming out of the nearby food court were calling her name. Particularly the chinese place, she had been craving them for the last week at least . Plus, Jared had been raking her over coals about how her availability was going to drop dramatically once she started college in the next couple of weeks, and one of the creepy regulars had followed her around the store for-freaking- ever (she's pretty sure he had been staring at her ass the whole time too honestly) until Curtis had basically shoved her into the back room to let her escape while he covered for her. And surprise surprise, Jared hadn't been too thrilled about her 'abandoning her post' and yelled at her about that too. 

Whoever said that working in a bookstore was a lazy job where she got to read books in her free time was a dirty, rotten liar. It was hell on earth and she was going to slowly tear the fingernails off whoever it was that said it (even though she had a sinking feeling it had probably be Ashley herself that said it back when she romanticized working in bookstores when she was, like, ten ). God, she really really needed that Chinese if she had any plans of surviving the last four hours of her shift.

The phone at the front desk behind her begins to ring, but a quick backwards glance has her realizing that with poor Curtis trying to deal with an older woman who is adamant that the book he's trying to sell her is the wrong one because she is 'positive that the book had a light purple cover and this one is lavender, that is two different colours and I want the right book now ' and Kyrstin being forced to deal with the rest of the line herself, that Ashley's the one who's going to have to answer the phone. With a groan of resignation (she hated answering the phone at work but Jared was in a horrendous enough mood as it was), she stood up and made her way over, repeating the greeting she was going to have to say over and over in her head so she (hopefully) wouldn't mess it up. And taking a deep breath, and repeating the greeting once more in her head, she forced a smile to her face as she picked up the handset.

"Hi! Thanks for calling—"

"Fucking finally Ash."

In an instant, Ashley could feel every ounce of nervous energy violently expel from her body as she nearly doubled over with another groan, this one entirely of exhaustion. She took quick glance over her shoulder, but Jared seemed to busy with another phone call in his office thankfully. "What are you doing Josh?!" she whispered angrily, "I'm at work right now you moron!"

"Uh yeah, I know. Why do you think I called you using this number?"

Ashley gave Kyrstin an apologetic and pained smile when she looked at her curiously, who responded with a good-natured shake of her head and a laugh under her breath as she turned to help the next customer. "Well, you didn't have to call here."

"Kinda did, Ash. You kept ignoring me."

"I was ignoring your calls you butt, you could have just texted me instead you know."

"Hmmm, no. Anyways I tried calling to tell you that Chris and I might not be able to meet up with you for lunch."

Ashley felt disappointment flood her entire being. "Oh. I see. But you really could have just—"

"We're at the hospital while Chris gets some x-rays done."

Immediately any disappointment fled her body as Ashley all but collapsed on the counter for support as her legs gave out on her. "Is he okay?! Oh god, is he okay Josh?!"

There's a pause on the phone and all Ashley can hear is her own blood pounding in her ears. He has to be okay. He has to be, he just has to be!

"I dunno, it was a pretty gnarly fall. Don't know if he'll ever truly recover, there was a lot of screaming after all."

Ashley doesn't even respond as she slams down the phone and turns to Kyrstin and Curtis who are looking at her in shock as her entire world falls to pieces around her. "I-I have to go. Chris is... Chris is..." she can't get anymore out with how it feels like someone is ripping her heart out of her chest. "Josh said he's in the hospital and...and..."

Curtis nods quickly as he runs to the staff room, and Kyrstin just starts shoving her towards the door as they all ignore the customers who are standing around awkwardly. "Go. We got this."

Ashley turns her head towards Jared's office. "But I gotta—and, and I need to grab my stuff—

"Nope. You go. Curtis and I will figure something out, and Becks arrives for her shift in another half hour. We can manage just fine until then. You just get out of here right now."

Ashley doesn't try to fight anymore than that, not with how hard she's fighting to hold back breaking down in the middle of the store after all. Curtis meets her at the entrance with her bag and shoves it into her arms. "Do you need me to call you a taxi, or give you a ride, or anything? Kyrstin can drag Jared out of his cave if she's gotta." Next to him, Kyrstin nods furiously in agreement.

Ashley has never loved anyone as much as she loves her coworkers in this instant. "No, my-my mom gave me the car for today."

With that little bit of approval, and a random customer shouting ‘I hope he's okay hun!’ at her, the two of them shove Ashley into the mall itself and the very instant she crosses that threshold she takes off running, shoving her way through people and nearly falling down the stairs in her effort to get to the parking lot as quickly as she can. She is so, so glad that her mom basically forced the car on her today instead of letting her take the bus as originally planned, she doesn't know how she would have lasted if she'd had to wait for a taxi to arrive and pick her up.

As it is, once she's finally (and somehow safely) managed to arrive at the hospital and found a spot to park, she's nonplussed about the fact that she didn't leave any imprints in the steering wheel from how hard she had been gripping it the whole drive over. She fumbles with the clasp on her seatbelt with shaking hands, almost bursting into tears about that fact alone, but she eventually manages to free herself and basically throws herself out of the car, only remembering to lock the door behind her when she's about halfway to the hospital doors.

The moment she bursts into the waiting room, Josh is sitting there waiting for her. He looks up at her in surprise as she hurries towards him, then down at his phone and back up at her again as he gives a low whistle. "Shit Ash, how many laws did you break to get here that fast?"

She ignores him. "What happened?! How is he?! Just tell me he's okay! Please, please tell me he's okay!"

"I mean, I suppose he's as fine as he could be considering the circumstances." He seems to sense that she's about ready to scream at him so he quickly follows up with "He's on the second floor, in room 272 if you want to see him."

Ashley doesn't even bother to thank him as she bolts to the nearby elevator, frantically pushing the 'Call Elevator' button nonstop until the door opens and then doing the same thing to the second floor button as it carries her up. Her eyes are burning in an effort to hold back her tears but she can tell that the dam is about to burst any second, especially with how long this elevator is taking to move. She doesn't even wait for the doors to open fully, squeezing through them the moment they're wide enough and accosting some poor nurse until he points her down the correct hall. She hurries the rest of the way, staring at every number on the wall until she finds room 272. And then she stops, her hand on the door knob as she braces herself for whatever she's going to find. Chris lying in bed, covered in blood and bandages with a heart monitor beeping next to him, just broken and shattered beyond all repair. With a choked back sob she opens the door—

and finds Chris sitting on the bed looking up at the ceiling bored to tears with a splint wrapped around his pinky and ring finger on his right hand.

"Finally! I thought you would never get here, so if we could just get this over with—" he looks over at her standing in the doorway shell shocked and still in her work uniform and jumps to his feet. "A-Ash?! What the hell are you doing here— Wait, did you just come here straight from work?! "

"You're okay?" Ashley hates how small her voice comes out, "You're really okay?"

"What? Yeah, why wouldn't I be? Who told you—"

Spell broken, Ashley’s bag falls from her shoulder to the ground with a small clatter and she dives towards Chris, wrapping him in a tight hug. "Oh thank god. Oh thank god. " Chris starts to return the hug, likely more than a little confused about what's going on, but she's already moved so her hands are on either side of his face as she tugs him down to her level so she can get a better look at him. Twisting and turning his head this way and that as she looks for any bruises or cuts. "Josh told me that there had been an accident and—"

"Ash!" Chris interrupts her by taking her wrists in his hands—though he winces at the pain that likely forms as a result of doing so—and speaks as calmly and reassuringly to her as he can. "Ash, it's okay. I'm fine . I promise. I just tripped earlier that's all."

Ashley takes in the sight of the scuffed up palms of his hands, and the holes in the knees of his jeans that certainly hadn't been there before, and knows that Chris is telling the truth. Though it doesn't explain the splint on his hand.

"Okay, and I might have broken my finger doing so."

Ashley just stands there so dumbfounded and relieved in equal measure, that she blurts out "Josh said that there had been screaming."

To her surprise, Chris only gives an embarrassed groan as he stares at an area just over her shoulder "God, Josh is never gonna let me live that down is he? Okay, so my finger may not have been the only thing that broke..." Confused, mainly because except for the bandaged finger and ripped jeans he seems perfectly okay, Ashley looks over her shoulder and follows his eyes to his phone laying on the counter just behind her. The screen completely shattered to hell and back with no promise of life anywhere on it. Just the dead, black screen reflecting the ceiling above on its cracked surface 

"Wait," Ashley starts to feel the relieved giggles try to break free as her nerves finally settle, "are you telling me that you broke your finger but you were more worried about your phone? "

Chris sputters as he starts to wave his splinted finger infront of her face. "I mean obviously! This doesn't cost me any money to fix Ash; that's what health care's for! But my phone? Do you know how expensive that thing's going to be to replace? How many paychecks I'm going to have to put towards it? All the money I saved up this summer for school: gone! All because of a stupid little sidewalk curb!"

Ashley can't help it, she starts laughing uncontrollably as she collapses into a nearby chair with her head in her hands. "Oh, I am going to kill Josh when I see him, kill him! And then Jared's gonna kill me for bailing at work and not telling him! God, and I just left in the middle of a rush too! Remind me to buy Kyrstin and Curtis a cake or flowers or something as an apology. Oh my god ."

"You just ditched work? Ash!" Chris falls back onto the bed as he laughs with her. "Why would you even do that in the first place?!"

"Josh told me that you were in the hospital getting x-rays! What was I supposed to think?"

Chris rubs at his eyes beneath his glasses. "I asked him to let you know that we were probably gonna be a little late for lunch while I waited to get my cast! Fucking hell, I'm so sorry."

"Am I interrupting anything or..."

The two of them turn to see a doctor looking up at them with an upturned brow, and holding what Ashley assumes (and hopes) to be the materials needed for Chris's cast. "This is Chris Hartley's room correct?"

"Oh, uh, yeah. That's me."

The doctor nods, and walks towards Chris, but stops in front of the chair Ashley is sitting in. "I'm sorry, but I will be needing that chair sweetheart." With a squeak of apology, Ashley jumps out the chair and moves back by the door so fast that she's almost certain that she had managed to teleport over there, almost tripping over her forgotten bag in the process. Red-faced, she picks it back up and goes to leave (and possibly strangle Josh violently) but is stopped by the same doctor as she sits down in the chair with a chuckle, shaking her head. "You don't have to leave if you don't want to. It'll only take a couple of minutes to get this cast on and then he'll be free to leave with you." 

Now even more red-faced (if that was even possible), Ashley just slowly shuffles over to the table where Chris's (broken) phone and wallet is, nervously fidgeting with the strap of her bag as she waits for Chris to get the cast on. Taking Chris's hand in her own, the doctor—Dr. Klorens her name tag reads—scowls at the now slightly bent fingers in the splint, which Chris only gives a sheepish shrug and smile to, and sighs as she unwraps his fingers so she can reset the splint. And Ashley blanches at the deep, dark bruises that spread all the way from the middle of his pinky to nearly halfway down his palm that she had completely failed to notice earlier before those are once again lost. 

And as promised, once the Dr. Klorens has put the cotton sleeve over his hand and trimmed it to the desired length, it only takes her another couple of minutes to wrap starting from the center of his forearm and all the way up to the center of his palm and then finally finishing with his splinted fingers. As the three of them wait for the fibreglass material to dry, Dr. Klorens goes over the do's and don'ts of cast care, which Ashley takes serious note of because she knows that Chris won't. Especially the 'do NOT get the cast wet' part, he's gonna forget about that one the moment Josh tries to bait him into another water gun fight.

"Alright, I think that's about it. Just come back in three weeks so we can do another x-ray to check and make sure that the bone's all healed up before we remove it. Just let someone know that you're done with the room when you leave, and remember to check out at the front desk." She gathers up her supplies and makes to leave, but stops to look over her shoulder at them with an amused smile on her face. "Oh, and if you two take the stairs, just make sure that you're careful. I know that we're in a hospital already, but I don't think any of us want to deal with any more tripping instances. Especially if they result in another broken bone." After waiting for Chris and Ashley to meekly agree to be careful, she finally leaves the two of them alone once again.

"Welp, that's it for my summer. 'Fraid I'm nothing but a cripple now."

Sighing, Ashley turns to Chris with a tired smile. "You are not a cripple, oh my god. You have a broken finger, you didn't lose the entire arm you dork."

Incensed, Chris waves his cast at her. "Um, do you not see this thing Ash? I may as well have. I've lost the use of two of my fingers now! Two! And on my right hand to boot. I can't hold a controller to play games with, I can't type, I can't text. What am I supposed to do Ash if I can't hold a single thing in my dominant hand anymore?"

"I'm sure you'll manage," she dryly responds. "Now come on, let's get out of here. I have to figure out how in the world I'm going to explain this to Jared so he doesn't fire me."

"Pretty sure that you should just let him if you ask me."

Ashley groans in agreement, but says "It's only another couple of weeks until college starts. Just hoping I can hold out until then, I need the money after all."

Chris lets out a resigned breath but then starts eyeing her work apron. "You got a sharpie in there?"

"Um, I think so. Why?"

"Uh, so you can sign my cast, duh. You missed out when I broke my arm when I was like nine, so you can be the first to get your name on this one."

"Trying to weasel my autograph out of me huh?" Ashley asks even as she digs through one of her pockets to pull out the sharpie in question, and joins Chris to sit next to him on the bed.

Chris laughs. "Damn, you figured out my devious plan. Thing’s gonna be worth a fortune when you make it onto the bestsellers list one day. Gonna be fighting off all sorts of crazed and fanatic fans."

Ashley shakes her head as she chuckles and writes her name on his arm, but pauses when she caps the pen. Seeing her name on his cast suddenly pulls everything back into vivid clarity, and she remembers the panic she had felt when she had thought—when she had believed —that she had nearly lost him. That this was it, that he was here one day and gone the next, and she hadn't even told him how much he meant to her. How important he was to her. She watches as a drop of water splashes down onto the cast and she finds herself wondering if there's a leak in a room upstairs.

"What the—Ash? Are you crying?"

"Huh?" She wipes her eyes, and a surprised but weak laugh escapes when her hand comes away wet. "Oh, I guess I am. Sorry about that, you're supposed to keep the cast dry and here I am crying—"

Chris places his left hand on her cheek to help wipe away some of her tears. "Oh fuck, I really freaked you out didn't I? Fucking hell. I'm—"

"Do you promise not to hate me?"

The look Chris gives her is nothing short of bamboozled. "Hate you? Ash, what's going on with you?"

"Do you promise not to hate me? Please Chris, I really, really need you to promise me this. Please . Do you promise not to hate me?" She’s fully aware that she’s practically begging right now, silent tears flowing down her cheeks, but if it gets Chris to promise then she’ll gladly throw away her pride for this one thing.

"Yeah, I-I promise. Will you just—"

Ashley doesn't give him anytime to finish his sentence before she's squeezing her eyes shut and she surges up to kiss him. She doesn't want to see his expression, not when all she wants is just to remember everything else that is happening. Remember the feel of his lips before he pulls away, and the warmth of his hand on her cheek. In fact, she spends so much time trying to memorize what she is sure is only going to be a single shared kiss, that it takes her a few seconds longer than she would like to admit to realize that Chris's hand isn't on her cheek anymore, it's moved to the back of her neck so he can kiss her back . The shock of which is enough for her to break the kiss and stare at him with wide eyes.

"Wh—" that's all she can get out before Chris is pulling her back in for a second kiss, and this time she lets her eyelids flutter close as she completely melts into, throwing her arms around his neck to hold him closer.

Ashley's not sure how long they stay like that—could have been an eternity, could have only been a couple of seconds—before they're both pulling back with their faces flushed and giggling like morons.

"Wow," Chris says after a moment, "I don't know what made you think I could hate you after that , but wow . If I had known that this would be the reaction I get, I would have broken my finger years ago."

There's something about the way he says it that has Ashley's heart beating even faster. "How long?" she demands breathlessly, "Tell how long ago?"

Somehow, Chris manages to flush even deeper. "I dunno, like... six? I guess?"

Six years. He'd had a crush on her for six years and she'd had no idea. The moment the realization hits her she starts laughing. "I knew you were trying to ask me for a kiss back in seventh grade! I should have just chased you down and given you one anyway!"

This time, it's Chris who starts laughing at the realization. "Wait, you liked me too?! Then that kiss, back in the library...?"

"You still remember that?!"

"Remember it? Ash, that stupid little cheek kiss is the only reason I passed that final I'm sure! Hell, why else do you think Josh dared me to kiss you in truth and dare?"

"What? No he didn't!"

Chris shakes his head as he moves his hand from her neck to around her waist. "He did! He told me to 'return the favour' and all I had been thinking about that summer was kissing you back. Fucking hell, I almost killed him when he pulled me away to get that generator working that winter in the lodge."

"Oh my god, I almost jumped across the floor to you that night when the power went out after the bottle landed on you."

"You didn't!"

Chris sounded so scandalized at the idea that Ashley presses her forehead to his as her smile widens, which only causes his own to widen in turn. "I did! But then Josh pulled you away and I just completely lost my nerve." She starts laughing at the next memory. "Oh god, I kept my lamp on in my room after that hoping you would stop by if you thought I was still awake."

The answering gape in shock was all she needed before she broke into more giggles. "I saw that! I don't know how long I hovered outside your door trying to work up the courage to knock before talking myself out of it. I think I just convinced myself that the outage had freaked you out badly enough that you needed the extra light to get to sleep."

Once the giggles started to lessen, the smiles on their faces did so as well, softening to something warmer and infinitely more cozy. "I almost kissed you, you know," Ashley confessed shyly. "Back at your grad party."

"Yeah, I-I almost kissed you too. And, just so you know, I wasn't lying then. The flowers looked really really good on you." 

"That's good to hear," she admits as she leans in closer, her lips brushing his so lightly it's almost a caress, "I kept them, after all."

Nothing more is said as Chris closes the distance between them again to kiss her, and even though she knows that they really should get back downstairs, she doesn't try to stop it.

They have a long six years to make up for after all.

[laufire]

RNM 3x04

Although I’m enjoying the season so far, I gotta say, the episodes feel super disconnected, this one most of all. I blame the fact that Liz (THE LEAD) and Rosa still aren’t participating in the main fucking plot :)))

I’m still extremely wary of Rosa’s storyline. I think it makes sense for the character, and that *for now* they’re keeping it in line with it being more about Rosa proyecting/exorcising her issues than about Wyatt Long’s manpain, but. I’m eyeing it. And I really want her to be more involved in the main plot/do more stuff. Now that Kyle is in peril and Long is leaving town (which made me wonder whether he’ll become a suspect, actually), I hope that’s where she’s headed. I loved her art (it always has so much personality in it, I love how they do it) and her quote about people changing and becoming who they want to be.

I feel that with this storyline I’m doing a reverse of my usual “things I roll with in fiction but wouldn’t stand for irl” LOL. Because if I was in Rosa’s shoes I WOULD try to deradicalize someone like Long -and there’s no shortage of people like Long in my hometown, so I’m not just talking out of my ass here-, less for him and more as harm reduction and for my own morals. But this could derail Rosa’s storyline in really annoying ways. And I REALLY don’t trust this show’s track record with race. On top of that, a lot of the discourse around redemption arcs~ conveniently omits the fact that only white male characters are pressumed to get them after they commit horrible acts. Why can’t Flint, a MoC, be the one to get a redemption arc instead, for example? It could’ve been painfully easy to switch their storylines, and it could’ve been interesting since Rosa actually disliked him in high school. But the show suddenly decided to care for Long’s inner life. Because white characters (and people) are afforded more complexity by others, more good faith.

I’m not TOO worried about Kyle because it feels too early in the season to fully close that plot. But if they killed him I don’t know that I could continue with the show. I adore Rosa, but her storyline isn’t grabbing me; and I dig Michael’s family drama with Nora and the dictator, but they’re not as ~dear to me. Kyle this season was the one reuniting it all. And they can’t kill him before we figure out everything with the communicator and his father!! C’mon. Anyway. I did love him this episode, helping out; and his scenes with Michael (my rareship is sailing! xDD) were great, from their bitchiness with the radio to their perspectives during their argument. The moment Michael pushes him to take cover and then removes Kyle’s hand from his shoulder asldkfjaf. This fandom is weak for not writing me multiple pages of this rareship, js.

Speaking of rareships sailing LOL, I can’t believe after my joke post about Bert x Kyle I got a mini scene asdlfjasdf, where Bert talks to Kyle and pays a compliment to his mother. I’ve also said since then that I wanted more Bert in the show, but frankly, I wish it was for more alien/conspiracy/fun stuff (like his artisanal beer or his werewolf obsession! or get into the main alien plot!), and not an Issue Storyline that I don’t even trust the show to handle properly.

Maria and Isobel’s vision quest was fun, although I resent the fact that the Liz we saw for half the episode was a fake (seriously, BRING HER TO THE DAMN MAIN PLOT ALREADY). I don’t care much for the two of them bonding, tbh, but if it’s what Maria wants, so be it. And her moments with Kyle this season have made me more lenient towards Isobel, at least. I’m also curious about some of the elements in the quest: the first things Maria sees are Michael sitting in her bar and Rosa painting her table <33. Bert is around being attacked by racists. I also dig that either/both of them pictured Kyle in his doctor getup (with the radio).

Wrt the vision itself, I’m still on denial about the dead being Kyle lol. I’ve heard all the theories: fake death to hide the aliens (I hope that can get solved because if Kyle couldn’t for some reason continue his career in medice it would CRUSH him), and his mother (please don’t) seem the most likely options after this episode. Others are Sanders (for the hints in last week’s) or even Arturo (for Rosa and Liz’s reactions, although obviously the “Valenti” crest wouldn’t make sense there). I also don’t see how it makes sense to cover Kyle’s death if Logan killed him? Unless Max tries to heal him and leaves a handprint. Anyway, I hope none of the above die and it can be resolved. And BTW: the SPN war flashbacks I’ve witnessed in the tags with the “killing” method are. Something. I think RNM still kept the scene dramatic and the audience concerned, but man. The risk of that reference... I don’t know that it was worth it lol.

BRING LIZ TO THE MAIN STORYLINE FFS. I like what we see of her on LA in abstract, but in practice... she’s the lead ffs. One episode where she’s out and having a nice time dancing (those scenes were lovely, admittedly) like this one can be great, but after three episodes where she’s been so removed of it all? Nuh huh. Given recent events (Kyle’s attack, the handprint on her chest reacting, her resignation) I hope it changes soon. And I hope Heath can be taken at face value, because I don’t trust this show’s track record with MoC that could inconvenience its storylines (see Noah and Diego, or even Flint). Also, I LOLED at her dream in the beginning, with her imagining Max apologizing to her and expressing her own concerns about getting lost in their relationship lmfao (as if that would ever cross his mind xD).

His scenes with Kyle seem designed to get Michael out of his funk wrt his heritage, and I appreciate it (especially if it’s THIS, and not the useless or even counterproductive pep talks of anyone else Michael cares more about that does the trick lol). I’m still eagerly awaiting for development on this front. Related to that, I’ve seen the theories about Jones being his father, but. Eh. It’s not that I don’t see how it could be possible (he’s incredibly powerful and can make fire), but. To put it bluntly? I don’t think the actor can pull off what I want from the Dictator. I want someone charismatic, and preferably visibly older than Michael that actually looks like his father. Jones would be a terrible miscast on both accounts. If they bring someone else JUST for Michael it could also be a sign of him really taking over the storyline (which I’m still iffy about because of my other faves, but it’s an interesting way to see where the show is headed).

I feel they could have taken Jones to more interesting places but there’s still time. The good news is that he shaved his godawful beard AND saved a dog’s life lol. Also, am I the only one that thought he might’ve known Noah, when he grabbed his and Isobel’s picture? I’m curious about that.

[hotwings0203]

Okay idk wtf this is too but I’m bored at work so lemme do smthn rq.

Songs That Inspire My Works

Scary Yandere Songs:

Mezzanine-the song is sung is a very gritted-teeth type of way. Almost like the yandere is sitting in a dark room on a chair, just staring at a picture of the darling or mindlessly watching tv, positively seething about how giddy and happy she is. There’s one part of the song that goes “All these half floors will lead to mine” and it just makes me think of him basically saying that he’s gonna make her fall off her high horse and succumb to his level. Very Shigaraki vibes for a happy bubbly girl.

Still- verrryyy crazy drunk shigaraki vibes. The song was actually based on the lead singer who played with bones on a train track when he was younger. When the lyrics say “follow me into the trees, I will lead the way” that line gives me chills

Maidaiz-any generic yandere tbh, usually Dabi-actually, maybe Hawks cuz the voice is so smooth and buttery, and he’s singing about a chained girl surrounded by jewels and pearls. Idk it kinda fueled my Gilded Cage fic cuz he showered her with all this money and she still was just a captive at the end of the day

Dangerous- reminds me of kuroiro and tamaki sometimes, nothing too big here, just the reader feeling like they’re being watched by an unseen force

Kilmaa- OOOO now this is a good one cuz the whole music video and song itself is about a girl kidnapped into sex slavery basically and breaking out. In the video the girl is captured by this big powerful business man/mafia type guy, and at the end of all her trauma she stabs the guy and k/lls him. I’m thinking maybe hawks or dabi cuz yknow, big scary powerful guy gets his share of dues or whatever.

In For It- the song isn’t too scary on its own but just the slow kind of raspy way Tory Lanez sings makes me think of a darling in a club and is just dancing around when she sees maybe Bakugo staring her down all menacingly and lustful. She gets nervous and tries to avoid eye contact, but at the end of the song when it gets deeper and slower at the “I’m so offended” part, it makes me imagine he gets up and starts going after her.

Angst or Fluff

Turning Page-maybe makes me think of shigaraki or tamaki, very soft boys on the inside (and out for tamaki), like they start watching you out of the corner of their eyes unconsciously to catch you smiling or laughing. One of my fav lines is in there, “Your love was my turning page/where only the sweetest words were made” and idk it just makes me all mushy and soft

American Girls and French Kiss- I wrote a dabixhawks fic a while back, not one of my most popular pieces but I still had fun writing it. It was before 290 came out and everyone thought dabi knew who hawks was cuz of the childhood friends theory, and this song was kind of like a “fuck you im fine but not” vibe that went along with the angst potential of that side

Hold On Till May- this one I feel like can be used for dabi or shigaraki and their backstories. The song itself is about one of Vince’s ex gfs who was abused at home and would run away and wait for her parents to come find her(spoiler alert-they would never care enough to go after her). So I think in terms of backstories and exploring that part with the darling or character, you could take it both ways-either the guy is singing to the girl that it will all be okay, and that even though they’re both broken he’ll try for her. OR if it’s from the darling’s POV she could be saying like even though the character (Dabi or shiggy) have had a rough life shes there for them now.

Berenstein- super angsty song, reminds me of my ex tbh. Berenstein refers to (if I remember correctly) a memory shared by others even though the memory didn’t actually happen. I always think of this whenever there’s an ending where the character has to leave the reader and one day just reminisces about what they had. It’s like in the end they’ll move on and their lives don’t really change in terms of lifestyle of daily activities, but if they think back far enough, they can catch a glimpse of someone who used to be their everyhting. Very much dabi and shig.

Stay With Me- bakugo vibes, it’s like two ppl fighting and telling each other that the other was the one who left, but ultimately it doesn’t matter because he just wants them back and to not leave.

102- a lot of the 1975 songs get me in my feels (which is a tragedy cuz Matty Healy is islamophobic as fuck) and this one is another one. Major Dabi or Kirishima vibes, the song is about being friends and in love with a girl who is in love with someone else. It’s like you don’t know what to do with yourself and all that love you have for her

Anyways yeah if any of y’all wanna chime in w ur own fic song recommendations just reblog and continue this ig?? Tag people, or not lol just read all of this bs and have fun w it🤷🏽‍♀️

[willyouhaveme]

thanks for the tag @talkfine I lveo you 💗

(I get quite rambly)

why did you choose your url?

Betty was the song that got me to listen to folklore on the first night it came out (my friend @lesbianspooner mentioned how xe had heard it was very gay) so i listened through the album and with what I was going through the song was actually very hashtag relatable . It's about making mistakes and being vulnerable and I think "willyouhaveme" just captures that v well

any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them

Yep! Just one tho! (I have 2 urls besides that one saved but don't use them at all it's just prev urls I've had) it's @katvantassel it's just so I can keep my main for music and primarily taylor :) I didn't plan on making a sideblog when I first joined but I love shipwrecked too much

how long have you been on tumblr?

i felt completly confused by it but wanted to be on here but I'm a fool so I stayed off until late January 2021

do you have a queue tag?

Yeah! #queue heard the rumorz from Inez (it keeps with the betty thing) my queue Is usually so small tho it only posts during the night

why did you start your blog in the first place?

To see my wife marya on tumblr (she seems very at home here) and for taylor swift ! The brutal honest truth is rebekah told me how she had a selfie liked from taylor swift and that was the final push but I didn't realise taylor had been off tumblr for nearly 6 months LOLLLLL it's still lovely tho

why did you choose your icon/pfp?

I'm just a sucker for babey taylor rn tbh and the top is v good debut colours

why did you choose your header?

It matched colours ! And once again fool vibes betty triangle

what’s your post with the most notes?

On main? A lyric parallel I did (the one with pages) on my sideblog I think it is either a textposts meme or another meme about how u meet s/o

how many followers do you have?

126 (wild ! Ilyall)

how many people do you follow?

224 (I should go on a follow spree soon tbh)

how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ post?

it might get me to read it but it isn't a garunte that I rb it. Those things just stress me out too much even if it is for good cause and I know others feel similar. When I learned that yknow ! U can just not rb it ! And still help or learn about it it was a lifesaver /hyp

do you like tag games?

Mhm!!! I'm not always the best at returning them because mobile stinks at copying the text sometimes and I must admit I perfer ones like this vs a long chain post but I do love them

do you like ask games?

Yeah!! I haven't really done any (I've done one on my sideblog) bc I usually don't get a response but they are v cute

which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

Oh man idk *tumblr* famous is a lot hm (I also lose track of my mutuals sometimes) (rip tumblr mobile) I think maybe @xcleanx and @reputationn are cool and tumblr famous B)

do you have a crush on a mutual?

Nope! I do think about some mutuals often <3 but I wouldn't say I have a crush on anyone I think I've been able to keep myself from having crushes on online pals

i’m gonna tag @thefuckingstory @silverrosie and @allylovestay (no preassure !/g)

[olliya]

Fic Writer Review - tag game

Thank you so much for tagging me @tuliharja! I’m still not quite mentally back to the fandom and tumblr... But I’m working on it!!!

1. How many fics on AO3?

30. There is a bit less on ffnet, because recently I kind of stopped posting there...

2. Total AO3 word count?

466416. Wow. A lot...

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Naruto - 28

Bokurano - 1

Jujutsu Kaisen  - 1 (I tagged this single fic as JJK (Manga) and JJK (Anime) and now I have no clue why on my page it is listed separately, which gives impression that I have 2 fics in JJK and 31 fics altogether... Maybe I should untag JJK (Anime) or something...)

4. Top Five by Kudos?

The Last Ones Standing

Origin of the Never Seen

On Her Track (completely unexpected!?!?!!? A fresh oneshot so high? And the one published during publishing of Come Home marathon????)

Have We Met Before? (another oneshot, but that was for the event...)

Dreamt

Ok, I’m a bit shocked that Come Home is only 6th... That Veil is even lower....

5. Do you respond to comments, why/why not?

So, until half a year ago the answer would have been a crystal-clear YES. But I have to say that recently, especially after finishing of TLOS there were quite a lot of those complaining comments (esp. on ffnet) and seriously, if I had answered them, it would have been really sharp, so I held my tongue in many cases.

Also - and for that I really have bad consciousness - several very long and thoughtful reviews came very late (several months after the finish of TLOS) and I was already neck deep in Come Home and... I didn’t answer in time... I didn’t have time and mental space to write a suitable answer discussing all the points of the review. I am so sorry about that...

6. What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

Awakening is soo angsty, all of it, especially the ending. Maybe Wall has an angsty ending as well, but imo it is more scary than angsty.

Also both my non-Naruto fics are angsty as hell.

7. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you've written?

No. Somehow, I don’t see much appeal.

8. Have you received hate on a fic?

Nah... Some, imo ungrounded and stupid criticism, but that’s not hate.

9. Do you write smut?

Yup! Gladly!

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge. I once read a fic that had a plot veeeery similar to one of my oneshots (and it struck a wrong vein in me), but it was not that someone stole it... Just got overly inspired, I guess...

11. Ever had a fic translated?

Oh Yes!!!!! Huge thanks to all my translators!!! Actually, most meaningful and deep fandom interactions came through the translations of my work, so I am so unbelievable grateful that people took their time to spread my works.

@yomi-gaeru is translating TLOS to Chinese (it is posted on AO3 and on many other Chinese pages - I know Lofter is one of them)

Most of my fics were translated to Russian. Dreamt by LeeTaeKim, Veil over Their Eyes by Маленькая_девочка_  and last but not least, almost all the rest was wonderfully, patiently, carefully and beautifully (and sometime heroically as well) translated by @kotoffeya. Her page on fikbook where she posts the translations is here.

12. Ever co-written a fic before?

Kind of. @victoriacapo has so many ideas and they often somehow click with me in just the right way and I write them down. There is quite a list of them already: Price of Creativity, Wall, Dancing with the Stranger, Other Man’s Treasure, and last but not least Pass the Test.

13. All-time favourite ship?

Madara x Sakura!!!

14. What's a WIP you want to finish, but don't think you ever will?

Oh, Pass the Test lies so heavy on my heart... But I really cannot find the inspiration...

There is also another fic, WIP is a wrong way to call it becasue it is barely started, but it‘s a big, complex and daunting project and... I didn’t even really start. And I’m not sure if I will...

I also had so many ideas and started projects for the fandoms stats back then when I was doing a lot of it. But I don’t remember most of the ideas.

15. What are your writing strengths?

Hmmm... I’m not sure tbh. Maybe conveying emotions? maybe complexity of emotions?

Maybe someone can tell me?

What people did repetitively tell me is that I write Madara very well, that I write him authentic and IC. He is for sure effortless to write for me.

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

Lol, plots. Until recently I would have said ‘getting an idea’ but writing Come Home has healed me from that.

17. What are your thoughts of writing dialogue in other languages?

Well, I *am* writing them all in an *other* language, lol. English is *other* language for me. (Crying to tears about how anglo-centric this question is). And yes, I am uncomfortable writing casual speech. That’s also one of the reasons why I’m uncomfortable writing Modern AUs.

As for changing the language inside the fic - I don’t see really a purpose. There would have to be a really specific plot-reason for the inclusion of additional language for this operation to make sense.

18. First fandom you wrote for?

Naruto. I started writing in 2016.

19. Favourite fic you've ever written?

TLOS and Come Home. I am super proud of TLOS, and it is definitely my best work, but... I think Come Home wins. Even though it is *just* a collection of oneshots. But so much heart went into it, and - even though it is invisible to a bystander - there is a thread of themes, of certain logic that is strung through all these short stories and it is very precious to me.

Hmm, whom to tag... I didn’t talk to you for such a long time... maybe someone will still answer?

I tag traditionally: @yangssunglasses, @itsravencrone, @rhearenee-magane, @kendochick-moor @purple-possibilities, @sunsetbivd

[synesindri]

fic writer interview

i was tagged by @theoceanismyinkwell — thanks so much!! 

How many works do you have on AO3?

40 (although a few are drabbles...still)

What’s your total AO3 word count?

143 802 :D

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

5 on ao3, but really four because i listed the marvel ones in general MCU and the specific fandom. they are supernatural, what we do in the shadows, downton abbey, and thor. HOWEVER i have written for several and either didn’t publish those fics anywhere or posted them to sites before ao3 started and lost track of them lol. i think probably 8-10 total?

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Judges of Character (downton abbey, G) — explorations of george and sybbie’s reactions to thomas’s suicide attempt in s6 (HUGE thanks to @oleander4 for the inspiration for this one!!!)

Thomas Barrow and the Power of Friendship (downton abbey, T) — a series of character/relationship studies revolving around thomas

“Mr Barrow Has The Flu” (downton abbey, G) — daisy’s reaction to thomas’s "illness” in s6

Seize the Crown (what we do in the shadows, E) — uhhhh...indulgent hair pulling kink lol

Second Visitor (downton abbey, G) — daisy visits thomas after the thirsk fiar debacle

dang the downton abbey fandom really treated me well with kudos!! <3

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

yes!!! in part i respond because i love comments and i feel like responding to them encourages people to comment more, but mostly i respond because it gives me a chance to talk about the fic! when people pull out stuff i did on purpose to comment on, it’s really exciting to get to give the commenter a little more information about why i did that. and when they pull out something i didn’t even realize i was doing, i want to react to what they said and appreciate having something about my own writing called to my attention. i have probably failed to respond to a comment or two but i really do try and want to respond to all of them :D

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

uhhh probably Passive (thor, G) since it’s an infinity war thor-grieves-loki fic?  

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

i don’t...crossovers don’t particularly appeal to me usually. i don’t often think of ideas for them.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

aaahahaa ok no i have not (fingers crossed for it staying that way!!!) but i DID get a comment on a supernatural fic that was essentially someone going on a strange, aggressive rant about theological justifications for misogyny that were loosely related to the fic in question? that is also the only comment i’ve ever removed from a fic...

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

yee. idk if any particular kind? i don’t really enjoy writing smut tbh but i do sometimes just because i have some idea that i want to express that necessitates some sexy shenanigans. typically when i write smut it’s uhhh odd in one way or another? a bit creepy and/or unsettling? because that’s the vibe i enjoy writing. the weirdness makes it more entertaining for me to write than the sex does :p as a result it’s probably not very hot but you know, whatever lmao

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i’m aware of!

Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes!! Human Indulgence (supernatural, T, starring lucifer and lilith in one take on lilith’s corruption) was translated into spanish by Gordafabi. the translation is here!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

nah...not saying i wouldn’t, but i like to write alone with my thoughts mostly.

What’s your all time favorite ship?

samifer ✌️sorry about my amazing taste skskskskss

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

gawddd yeah...the thing informally known as the adversary-lawboy tapes is #1 on this list. i have a bunch of snippets of sam n lucifer chit chatting and generally having a weird time in sam’s head throughout s5 and especially in the interval between the “yes” and stull cemetery, but there’s no way i’ll ever actually turn it into anything solid. i’d also love to finish the fic in which gabriel acts like a sickly god and does a bunch of very sketchy things but again, there’s no way i’ll ever do it. RIP. 

fortunately neither of those is public so it doesn’t matter to anyone but me that they’ll stay WIPs forever :p

What are your writing strengths?

characterization, atmosphere/pacing, and pretty little prose stuff. i care a lot about these things and get comments on them so, hurray! (also i think i’m good at a tie-in gut-punch ending on occasion...heh)

What are your writing weaknesses?

i keep not actually writing anything!!! lmao but ok other than that i sometimes try to convey something too complicated without enough explanation. i also often write these really obnoxious sentences that you have to read the end of to understand the beginning...my thoughts are not at all linear lol. i do TRY to fix these things whilst editing but...i’m sure they still happen :/ 

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

i usually don’t because i assume most readers won’t understand it and i don’t want to make people skip around the page for the translation. i’ll do it if it’s short and is more of an easter egg than a crucial line, or if it’s a quote from something else.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

harry potter

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

you know...maybe “Mr Barrow Has The Flu” (linked above). i feel like i really landed all the emotional beats in that, and did daisy right. i’m also very pleased with Drawn and Quartered (spn, T). there’s another spn fic i wrote during my first pass through the fandom that i think about often but i won’t say what it is because i think about lines in isolation but am not that satisfied with the fic as a whole hahhaha

tagging (extremely optionally!!!) @fandom-space-princess @ophanir @lovetheirloves @venhedish @hotgirlsummersam @bluecookiesforrick @whisperoftheheart925 and anyone else who wants to do this!

[jimines]

(cont.) Shouldn’t you be thankful that people are rb’ing and liking your creations despite the fact that tumblr is a lot less active nowadays? Man, even if it’s like 500 notes, that is a lot. Second of all, you’re a cc and I’m sure you have a considerable number of followers. Do you think it’s okay to act like this, where you’re talking really rudely in the tags? If someone has a large following, then they should use that platform to spread kindness and positivity.

ASDFGHJKL bro to me even like 100 notes is wild like... 0.0 the way I see it is like imagine 100 people looking at your work. AH. The ANXIETY LOL, but also really puts things into perspective for me. She really should have gone about everything differently or if she was going to be hurtful and rude she should've just stayed away from this site entirely T_T

↓ cont'd below the cut ↓

OOF, I hope no baby armies were so unfortunate LMAO. She had so many people TERRIFIED to speak up to her, she was the definition of a mean girl T_T I will never be able to wrap my head around why she thought bitching in tags, IN PUBLIC, was a good idea kgjhfdlkgh

Twitter is so much worse than Tumblr though, imagine that asdfghjkl Nic should just hangout there instead LOL as for annie, that's not my story to really confirm or tell haha

It is pretty insane to go around thinking no one is allowed to have any opinions that aren't your own LOL. So long as you aren't being hateful, I see no issues with someone not liking a song or a performance or whatever it may be.

She did definitely dumb herself down, and she did a lot of that to gain more followers. I love that the reason things are "dumbed down" according to google, like television for example, is to gain popularity. A LOT of what she did and said was about popularity. I didn't know or notice anything about her tags or anything before the big falling out, I never really had any opinions of Nic before then, but if I had I probably would've done the same and given her the benefit of the doubt. I've seen a lot of people blaming themselves for that but no one knew who she really was so it's no one's fault really.

LOL yeah no, just the fact that she came after me for posting icons yet people like jung-koook and jiminslight and whatnot (AKA blogs with bigger followings) did it too and Nic said fuck all to them? Really shows she was just annihilating "smaller competition" and trying to get in good with big blogs BAH.

OOF. That's all I can say to that, she really had the "I'm too good for you" vibe going on all the time LOL.

I never really thought about fanfics tbh, I don't typically share or rb them because I never read fics really nor do I often see them on my dash but I might now include fics in my tracked tag T_T everyone should be supported for whatever content they make. And you would think a fic rec list would be the perfect place to include more than just those that are well known, geez. If I made say, for example, a gif creators rec list or something, I wouldn't ONLY put "big blogs" and people that are already "well known" like? And I know she sees a lot of shit, she was online almost constantly too so she was no doubt ignoring those other fics and trying to seem "in" with the bigger blogs and shit. Ridiculous.

BRO when i found out she was a gemini i fucking died, I don't fuck with geminis dfjhkgldfhg I'm sure there are some good ones out there but I've come across several that have fucked me over so I do not trust LOL. And I heard about her "riots" actually, she also would post vague bitch-fests in her tags all the time when people wouldn't follow her back, complaining about her blog "being too trash" and how it makes her feel like she's "not good enough". There was one particular time she spoke to someone who didn't follow her back and their reason was because Nic just didn't post content this person wanted to see and Nic went into the tags of a rant post and made it seem like this person refused to follow her because her "blog wasn't good" or whatever. Completely twisted the story. Was quite amusing to read tbh LOL.

PFFF. That's so strange? What even. I always feel like, especially in Nic's case, the mutual thing is taken kinda too seriously lol. Idk I find it funny that she would bitch about people not following her back and then she outright put it on her about page that she wouldn't follow back UNLESS they messaged her. I-

I'm learning quite a lot from these asks LOL

[galvanizedfriend]

So because I decided to drop 14 chapters at once, and because of how AO3 counts page hits, and also because people tend to binge read these things when there's more than one chapter available (it's what I do, too), I know The Wolf II won't be getting the same kind of ridiculous numbers that the first one did (also because it's very possible not as nice as the first one). So I am here to kindly ask you, good folk reading this story, to help me out. 😁

No, I have no shame. 🙃

So we all know that the way a story is more likely to find new readers or to even bring back ones who might have read the first series is the combo hits/comments/kudos. Now, I know the hit count will be considerably low to the number of chapters. So I am here to kindly ask you, if you have read/are reading, and you did enjoy it, could you please click the kudos? lol I have a feeling a lot of people aren't, just by the number of messages I've been getting here. And although hit count will be low, kudos might be the best/most realistic way to keep track of how this story is faring out. So, if you don't mind, and obviously only if you have enjoyed what you read and you think it was a worthy time, I would be really grateful if you could just hit that kudos button. 😂

Of course if you ALSO want to drop me a comment and let me know how you like the story, I will love you forever and my firstborn shall be yours. But I don't expect people to do that, tbh. Although, I have to say, while it is WONDERFUL to get your inbox and chat messages and I LOVE to answer anything you might want to send my way and please, please, keep those coming, leaving actual comments on the story is also very important. Not just for me, personally, as the person who wrote it, but because that is a wonderful way to help the story reach more people. I am one who tends to get more curious about stories I don't necessarily know if they have a considerable comments/kudos count, and I also like to check reviews (I check reviews for EVERYTHING in my life, so also review tf out of everything, folks, there's always someone out there - me - who's going to read it).

I'm always here advocating for showing your support for writers publicly through comments, recs, reblogs, because that's how you help to spread the word and keep fandom moving forward, with more people creating and sharing content around. I will be the first to admit that lately I haven't been as diligent on that front as I was once before, mainly because I haven't been having much time, but I do try my best to keep up and, whenever I enjoy something, I try to let the person know and like to share their stuff, even if I don't have a huge following here. You can find all my recs lits and rec month by searching 'Klaroline Fanfic Rec' on my tags, by the way, if you're interested. So this isn't just something I say regarding myself and the stuff I write, but rather fandom at large - fic writers, gifset makers, edit/moodboard makers, video makers, and so on and on.

So, please, folks. Remember to spread the love and share the support, if you like something, don't be shy. Let people know and help that content reach as many people as possible. Likes button here on tumblr is nice, but it does nothing to promote stuff, and it is super hard to get things out there. So reblog, comment, or go to the actual piece (whatever it might be) and drop kudos and a note there. Even a single line helps.

And if you have the time, and you have taken your time to read the behemoth story I posted the other day, and if you have enjoyed it, I would really appreciate your little 💖.

Thank you, cheers!

[esepoimipullula]

Indiana Pipps/Dr. Kranz comics I’m planning on scanlating

as a reminder to myself because I’m not that good at keeping track of things and also to see if literally anyone besides me is interested in these characters and/or this ship, but these are only coming when 20+-pages stories stop feeling like such a daunting challenge tbh. also they won’t probably even be in this order because what even is proper organization. I mean, I don’t even know if I should use the Italian name I’m familiar with or the official English “Arizona Goof.”

titles definitely NOT definitive.

Stories I already have scanlated copies of to work on:

Mickey Mouse and Goofy in: Raiders of the Lost Temple - Goofy’s weird archaeologist cousin comes to Mouseton to enlist Goofy’s help in the search for the titular lost temple, as he suspects he’s being spied on by a ruthless rival. Indiana’s and Kranz’s first appearance, which I feel is pretty important because... do people outside of Italy even know who these characters are? Maybe the hardcore Goofy fans do, idk.

Indiana Pipps and the Lost Island - Indiana is searching for the location of a mysterious wandering island mentioned in texts going all the way from Ancient Greece to the 15th century, but of course, Kranz finds a way to tag along in hopes of stealing his discovery. The whole thing ends with Kranz imprisoned on the wandering island. This one is mostly relevant because of its sequel, Indiana Pipps and the Return of Dr. Kranz.

Indiana Pipps and the Return of Dr. Kranz - Kranz finds a way to escape from the wandering island and aims to reveal its current position to some Evil Rich Man who’d pay a lot to exploit its secrets. Indiana, of course, sets out to stop him... and in the process, he ends up telling Mickey that he and Kranz used to be friends, and how and why they eventually fell out and became enemies.

Indiana Pipps and the rescue out of obligation - After an unfortunate mishap involving two lost idols and an overly smug Indiana, Kranz is kidnapped by someone who wants to get their hands on an incredible (and potentially, incredibly dangerous) archaeological discovery he’s been working on. Indiana, still feeling a bit bad about their last meeting and also feeling his nemesis is kind of his responsibility, rushes to his rescue with Mickey’s help... except, not everything is as it seems. My favorite Indiana Pipps story, and the one that got me shipping this ship in the first place. Featuring hilarious amounts of pettiness and a bunch of conflicted feelings that are honestly the main reason why I want to translate this, because I kinda want to write meta about them without people stumbling on my post and being like “... okay but what the actual fuck are you talking about.”

Indiana Pipps and the Gardens of Asgard - Nothing shippy about this one, but it involves Norse mythology and few things make me happier than Mouseverse or Duckverse stuff involving Norse mythology.

Indiana Pipps and Circe’s enchantments - Sort of a WAY more lighthearted and comedic counterpart to The rescue out of obligation. Kranz thinks Indiana has been turned into a boar by a descendant of Circe, the witch from the Odyssey. He allies with Mickey to save him.

Indiana Pipps and the resounding stones - Indiana finds himself allying with Kranz and another archaeologist they both can’t stand to find the last of four special stones that, when put together, will reveal the way to a lost emerald idol. This one has a nice little bit of characterization for Kranz right at the end, plus I like stories where he and Indiana can at least agree on disliking another character more than they dislike each other.

Indiana Pipps and the King of Waves’ surfboard - Indiana and Kranz find themselves working together (more or less...) to find an ancient Hawaiian king’s “magic” surfboard on a behalf of a college they’d both studied in for some time and the wannabe surfer rockstar who’s ready to pay said college a million dollars in funding if they’ll be able to find him the surfboard.

Young Indiana - A six-episodes series about Indiana’s college years, when he was just starting to fall back in love with archaeology after some misadventures in his childhood had left him discouraged. Featuring Kranz as Indiana’s best friend and roommate, Indiana’s crush on a girl that doesn’t really go anywhere in the end and is much less important than his friendship with Kranz, and some intense friendship drama with a happy ending. Can you guess why I like it so much?

Stories I’m still looking for a copy of:

Indiana Pipps and the unbearable fixation - Indiana is so used to Kranz randomly popping out of nowhere and trying to steal his discoveries that justified caution and alertness turn into obsession: he starts thinking everyone he meets is actually his disguised nemesis, and Mickey has to try and cure him! The kind of story for when you like your friends to enemies to “it’s complicated” ship to have that extra little bit of obsession.

Indiana Pipps and the Chocofelix - Don’t remember this one at all, but there’s Martina Ubersetzen in it and I like Martina.

Indiana Pipps and the Desert Games - Indiana and Kranz, together with Professor Zapotec’s niece, Filippa Zapotec, are called on by their old college professor to accompany him in a desert expedition to find a Pharaoh’s board games. Except both of them are constantly at each other’s throat, and that pisses off both their professore and Filippa, and then they all realize someone might be sabotaging the expedition, and Indiana is sure Kranz is the saboteur, and they both think Filippa isn’t a “real” archaeologist because she’s obsessed with the paranormal and hunting for ghost in the ruins of the Pharaoh’s palace, and Filippa keeps getting offended, and... in the end, things do get better (at least for a while) and everybody manages to be surprisingly civil and even friendly with everyobdy else. Yes, even Kranz and Indiana. I actually still have the Topolino issue this story was published on, but it’s a bit ruined and also both my scanner and my ability to scan comics are kind of crap, so... still looking.

Indiana Pipps and the Foresight Stele - Indiana teams up with a cute, perky female archaeologist... but this time, she turns out to be Kranz’s cousin, working with him to set a trap for Indiana. Contains literally the only background on Kranz’s family besides a couple of details in Young Indiana.

Indiana Pipps and the Crystal Temple - Another one I don’t remember but want to include anyway because Martina.

Dining with Indiana: Indiana Pipps and the Survival Plant - Part of the Dining with Indiana series, where different characters have dinner with Indiana Pipps in his Mouseton house. Indiana and Kranz find themselves stranded in the desert and have to collaborate to survive, and swear to each other that if they manage to get out of this adventure alive, they will have dinner together once every year. They make it, and years later, they remember their adventure and how it all started during their latest dinner together.

[disregardcanon]

end of year writing meme

time for my end of year writing meme! this has been a tradition for me since 2015 or 16, so i’m excited to keep it up :) i normally do it ON new year’s eve because i write over winter break. but.

i have the depression/anxiety cocktail and have to go back to teaching next monday so i highly doubt i’ll get anything else written or posted by then. sigh

tagging @titaniumsansa @bodhimcbodeface and anyone else who wants to do it

Total Stories Written: 18 on ao3 19 completed total

Total Words Written: i know my ao3 stats are shifted p drastically this year because i updated two extensive drabble collections, but i do have more unposted drafts this year so i’ll just go with it. 96k Average Words Per Story: about 5k as the mean, which tracks Shortest Story: 370 words Heaven on Her Mind Longest: 11,875 words Academia Nuts

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d predicted?

less! i knew i’d write less this year than i have in the past because student teaching and then first year of teaching are both supposed to be hell, but i kind of expected going into quarantine that would give me the time and energy to write.

but NO! in some months of quarantine i wrote less than i did during student teaching, certified most stressful time of my life

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write most?

pairing: cassunzel! coming in clutch at 6 stories

genre: no fucking clue

fandom: tangled was the most by number, but i think jedi fallen order is the most by word count because those two fics combined come in about 13k

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January? uh, that’s probably rwby. i always knew that when i watched rwby i’d go feral but i didn’t expect to watch it this year

Did you take any writing risks this year? i think my biggest writing risk was writing a 12k fic with romcom tropes about a platonic relationship no one cares about from a mainly dead fandom

Academia Nuts, the one where merlin and morgana are bickering in-laws and academic rivals

Do you have any fanfic or general writing goals for the new year? i would frankly just like the time and energy TO write. this year has been the most stressful and depressing time of my life and that’s reflected in my writing output. i would like to see more output because i have more energy and drive to do the things that make me happy again

From the past year of writing, what was your…

Best story of this year: the thing with feathers fluttering in her chest the jedi fallen order fic about trilla suduri capturing cal kestis but still eventually deciding to defect

Personal favorite: Smoke Rises, Cinder Falls my personal take on the cinder backstory before it dropped! while i definitely like where the show took the backstory better because the hotel imagery is TOP NOTCH i still love what i did here. i think that i made good use of style and the information that we had, and i think that the salem connection works very nicely

Most under-appreciated: i know calling a fic with 65 kudos “underrated” is a bit ridiculous, but this is for a very large fandom. it might be dead but i still think it could drum up a bit more support :(

Academia Nuts, the merlin and morgana are bickering in-laws and academic rivals fic

Most fun to write: as a reward for being so fucking happy that biden won the election for real, i rewarded myself by writing the pines family reacting to it

Remember, Remember the 7th of November

Story with the single sexiest moment: how about that inquisitor caltrilla au?

I Want You to Want Me

Most “holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story: captive caresses, the one where the v shaped polyamory dynamic that i normally do with cassunzel and new dream isn’t so healthy

Most challenging to write: from a technical standpoint that would be academia nuts, but from a personal standpoint...

Scar Tissue, the steven universe fic about connie still keeping secrets from her parents

Biggest disappointment: frankly, nothing i wrote this year can be a disappointment because i put words on a page. however, i will say that i could have polished this one that i wrote years ago up more before i posted it

Holy Ground, the shireen/jeyne poole fic from like 2015

Favorite character to write: i didn’t get stuck on a fandom long enough to get a favorite character to write tbh

Favorite opening lines:

Sometimes, when Rapunzel wakes up in the morning, she likes to pretend that everything is alright. She closes her eyes and imagines that Cass is right down the hall, just like she used to be. Rapunzel will burst into her room as soon as she gets up, ready to plot some new mischief to keep them busy for the day. Cass will roll her eyes, but she’ll go along with it because she secretly enjoys Rapunzel’s plans. She’ll smile when Rapunzel isn’t looking, and she’ll call her Raps with a soft fondness that makes Rapunzel's heart melt.

Jeung

Sophie knows that she shouldn’t be walking home alone at this hour. Of course she knows that. She’s a tiny white girl who lives in Gotham with little self-defense training or experience in athletics. She’s had “don’t walk home alone” beaten into her head for so many years she wonders if those were the first words the nurse said when she came into this world.

 Not “it’s a girl!” but “don’t let her walk home alone at night!” 

Walk Me Home in the Dead of Night

Favorite closing lines:

“Follow me,” the fairy godmother ordered, taking a brisk step forward. Cinder followed without question, just a step behind. Following, following, following- just as she would be following her until the end of time. Cinder was her protege, after all, and must be prepared to take over the fairy godmother’s work someday.

That day would not come for many years, but it would come. And the fairy godmother would finally have everything  she ever wanted.

Smoke Rises, Cinder Falls

Trilla can’t exactly have her second-in-command stay that low in the hierarchy forever. A consort to a queen needs to walk only a few steps behind her, after all.

I Want You to Want Me

Other favorite lines:

She can lead a horse to independent thought, but she can’t make him think.

The Name Game

When Trilla gets back to her room, she grabs the damn cube and throws it against her wall as hard as she can. It doesn’t break, because the holocron is made of stronger stuff than that.  Cal Kestis  is made of stronger stuff than that.

Maybe she’s the only one in the world who’s so capable of shattering.

the thing with feathers fluttering in her chest

“You don’t have to forgive him,” Fuyumi says, “just don’t kill him.”

“Because he can’t come back from that?” Dabi demands, “a corpse can’t  decide that it wants to love its daughter, right?” Dabi watches as the  knife twists, and Fuyumi’s facade finally crumbles. She slams her mug of  tea down on the table, and they're both lucky that it's not full  anymore or the hot liquid would have come flying out.

Justice Without Dispassion

“But you’re a good trainer,” Lillie says, “you’re what I want to evolve into.” Selene shakes her head.

“We're  from different evolutionary lines,” she says, “you evolving into me  would be like- I don’t know. A Charmander evolving into a Blastoise.”  Lillie looks like she’s holding the fur even tighter, and Selene snakes  her hand underneath to disentangle Lillie’s hand from the fur and give  her something else to clutch. Lillie squeezes her hand like a stuffed  Jigglypuff that people carry around to squeeze away their stress.

“But  what if I’m stuck at Charmander forever, and what if Blastoise is  better than Charizard, and what if I’m just- just not cut out for this?”

Even Gods Like Cuddles

“Do you remember when we were really little,” you say, “and I used to  come over for dress up parties. I’d wear your extra princess dress, let  you do my hair however you wanted.” You smile, thinking about how cute  the pictures that Bianca’s mom took of you two looked. Your mother  always said that they’d be good blackmail material, someday, but-

It wasn’t ever shameful, especially not if your mother didn’t make you feel ashamed.

“Of  course,” Bianca says, “you were always the best at sitting still. No  one else would have let me do their nails and makeup.” You’re not  looking at her, but you can hear the soft smile in her voice.

“You were always so indulgent, Hils. I really appreciated that.”

“I wasn’t being indulgent,” you say, balling your hand into a little fist and rubbing your thumb over your knuckles.

“I always- I just,” you say, “I wanted to be that “girl friend” that you always wanted.”

Girl Talk

[inkjackets]

30 Questions About Me

thanks for tagging me @apopcornkernel and @authenticcadence18!!!

Name: clare

Gender: cis female

Star sign: virgo

Height: 168cm (5′6″)

Time: 9:40pm

Birthday: 8th september

Fave band/group: hmm i don’t really have favs but recently i’ve been listening to a lot of Oh Wonder and ANIMA!

Fave solo artists: again no real favs but right now i’m loving dodie and mxmtoon

Song stuck in my head: ah now i’ve mentioned mxmtoon i’ve got ‘no faker’ stuck in my head haha

Last movie: uhhhh either the muppets christmas carol or the greatest showman, can’t remember which was last, but im literally about to watch the live action mulan for reasons

Last show: Normal People

When did I create this blog: uhhhh hold up lemme check... April 2016! ugh i’ve been in this fandom too long aha

What do I post: mostly ml reblogs and stuff but i write and post fics too! (especially over the last year, i think i wrote more last year than the previous three years combined lmao) i also post the odd bit of art :) 

Last thing I googled: uh how to work out averages in excel haha (i’m trying to track my writing progress this year)

Other blogs: @inkjackets-original​!! this is a blog for my original short stories and pieces of flash fiction :D

Do I get asks: yeah sometimes! especially when I reblog ask games or ask for fic requests, i’ll always get a couple <3

Why I chose this url: so back in the year 2016 i fell stupidly hard into a stupid show called Miraculous Ladybug and through it i discovered FANFICTION (i’d like obvs heard of it before, but never engaged with it) and anyway after a while reading amazing fics i discovered to my horror/delight that i wanted to WRITE IT TOO sooooo i decided to create a tumblr! and since this was intended to be a sort of writing blog i wanted to come up with a writing/book related username and came up with inkjackets – after all books are just pages of ink wrapped in dust jackets! (though like i said before until last year i never actually did much writing lol)

Following: 802

Followers: 415 <3

Average amount of sleep: anywhere between 6-10, it changes daily 

Lucky number: i don’t really have one? i usually just say 7. or 13 if i’m feeling controversial hahaha

Instruments: i don’t really play anything :( but i like to sing! i’m nothing special but i’ve always been a part of school choirs and stuff :) 

What I’m wearing: thick long-sleeved stripy top and dungarees

Dream job: ah a question i still hate at the age of 25 (: i seriously have no idea!! part of me wants to be an author and have a chill time writing in the countryside all day, but i also love being outdoors and would love to continue being an activity instructor doing fun and adventurous things forever, but then i also want to get a fancy job in the city running around being busy and important!! i just want to do a bit of everything you know?

Dream trip: i’d love to do rural asia, especially china, to see all the cool mountains and beautiful scenery they have there

Fave food: noodlesssss!! give me any sort of asian noodle dish and i’ll love you forever

Nationality: British and Australian

Fave songs: hmm some songs i never get bored of are ‘Boys Like You’ by dodie, ‘Who We Are’ by Imagine Dragons and ‘Blood’ by ANIMA!. right now i’m also obsessed with ‘Undertow’ by Lisa Hannigan (who, fun fact, voices blue diamond in su!)

(bonus song: i’ve also been listening to ‘walk but in a garden’ by mxmtoon so much recently cause it gives such good lockdown chill vibes)

Last book I read: Children of Time by Adrian Tchaivosky, a really really well done (if kinda unsettling) sci-fi novel, but ngl i want to talk about the book i read before that which is An Absolutely Remarkable Thing (and its sequel) by Hank Green which was FANTASTIC like hands down one of the best books i’ve read in a long time and if you’re looking for something fun and easy while also tackling serious real world problems (like the dangers of social media) then i HIGHLY recommend it, like honestly even if that’s not something you’re looking just go read it anyway!!!

Top 3 fictional universes I’d love to live in: 1. Harry Potter. kinda goes without saying haha, i want to be able to do magic 2. ATLA, (like only if i’m a bender tho lol) 3. hmm Chronicles of Ancient Darkness. It was one of my fav serious as a kid and I always longed to live in that sort of intelligent pre-historic age, and the world michelle paver creates feels so damn realistic, and i just feel like i’d thrive in that sort of world, tbh (i think the adhd would help lmao)

thank you so much for tagging me!! that was loads of fun ^^ i’m not gonna tag anyone but if you want to do this game go ahead and tag me in it!!