#I do quite a lot of dishes very well I'm just very pleased with how that one turned out

[tswwwit]

tell me something about yourself, dear author.

I really like cooking!

[missmugiwara]

What A Relief

Summary: fem!reader x Sanji // You convince Sanji to have a friends-with-benefits relationship with you, but it's not like you want to actually date him, right? Right? Warning: 18+, NSFW, smut, unprotected sex, implied sex, very suggestive, friends-with-benefits thing going on Note: I am weak for Sanji! Please enjoy!

It was so stupid.

You knew there was indeed a possibility that this could happen, but you still went ahead and did it. You got too presumptuous. Too confident. You flew too close to the sun. And then you got burned.

But how did it all start?

If you reflected back on it, you weren't entirely sure yourself. It was surprising especially in the way that everything had just blurred together. To put it into filthy words, Sanji became the answer to your booty calls. Okay, well… if you put it more eloquently, you somehow had managed to develop some sort of friends-with-benefits relationship with none other than the cook himself. If you put it even more simply, Sanji became a weekly event - as in, the person whom you could have sex with without any strings attached.

A while back, you set out to sea with the Straw Hat Pirates. They were a wonderful group of friends - they protected you, made treasurable memories with you, and truly accepted you for who you were. You had no complaints whatsoever. As of late, you were becoming a bit bored. A bit needy. Needy in the ways that required a certain relief in the form of pleasure. The thought of having a romantic relationship crossed your mind once or twice, but being a pirate and constantly moving about meant there was no room for that. You accepted that wholeheartedly, but could you somehow attain the romance you sought out?

So a crazy idea crossed your mind.

Could you get one of these fine Straw Hat men into bed? You flustered at the thought of it, and you could tell it was a wild idea when you felt hot and checked the nearest mirror to see your ridiculous expression. How about Luffy? No, he was your captain! He saved your butt on your hometown of Dressrosa. That would have felt too awkward. Then Zoro? Hm, well, he definitely seemed like the kind of guy who wouldn't mind doing that and could keep it a secret… but you were too damn nervous to insinuate such an idea to him without feeling utterly humiliated. Franky? He seemed the most mature - wait. Never mind. Him, Luffy, and Zoro were definitely not mature. Usopp, then? No, an instant no. He still struggled to be brave time to time. How could he possibly not chicken out if you asked him?

Hmm.

What about Sanji?

He was so sweet. A good friend. Very good-looking. You never felt embarrassed in front of him. He would treat you so well, and he already did. Plus, he always made goo goo eyes at Nami, Robin, and literally any other woman. It was perfect. Knowing this, he wouldn't get attached to you, and you wouldn't get attached to him… because that's not what you were looking for, right? Exactly!

So when you finally mustered up the courage to ask Sanji, he really was shocked. You stayed behind one evening to help him clean up dishes after dinner. When everyone left you two to complete your chores, that's when you asked. Naturally, you were nervous, face on fire, and averting his gaze. There was a range of emotions mostly on Sanji's part. His jaw dropped. Then after a few seconds (when you were afraid you had broke him), he had launched himself across the room due to the sheer force of a nosebleed. After tending to this nosebleed and him sputtering over and over how he really did not deserve you - the goddess, the angel, etc. - he agreed.

"Oh, I know I'm asking for a lot… but, I would really love if it were you. I trust you so much."

It was kind of cute in the way his eyes sparkled at your words, and a blush fluttered over his cheeks while he had tissues sticking out of his bloody nostrils. To be honest, you wouldn't have had it any other way. It was quite comical. It took a moment longer for him to respond. You gently smiled and held him in your arms as he laid on the floor after his great lift-off.

Finally, Sanji sat himself up. Grabbing your hand, he said, "I am honored, my sweet, and I promise to make you feel like an absolute queen."

Those words were enough to send your heart racing. Sanji was the best. As you two sat there on the floor of the kitchen, faces flustered and having Sanji's head in your lap - you had reminded yourself again that this was simply fun between two friends. That's it. No romance.

You already knew Sanji was a man of his word, but he sure delivered. The first night together was akin to something out of a romance novel, and it was absolute bliss. Sanji removed your clothes slowly and gently, never allowing a single wrinkle to form as he laid them down. He always asked for permission before he did anything, and he always reminded you that if you changed your mind then you could stop at any time. He truly was a gentleman and kept his promise through and through. He whispered soft, sultry things into your ears. When he got more cocky, he'd whisper more sensuous things - things like how he was going to make you sing, make you moan, make you sigh out his name. And every time he did get you to moan, he'd whisper how your noises brought him to heaven. Your heart beat against your ribcage as if it was trying to break free, but you kept ignoring it because all you could focus on was just being his friend.

However, it was such a sweet, addicting high.

His touch was sensual and soft on your skin, the way his hands held you gently as if you were made from glass. Years in the kitchen must have been why his expert hands were so graceful when they roamed, and when they roamed to more inmate areas on your body, you would let out a gentle gasp against his mouth. You had never been held the way Sanji held you.

Kisses were sweet and never done without feeling. They could have brought you to your knees if you already weren't rolling around in bed. Sanji's mouth tasted like cigarettes, but you could care less as the delicious noises of your lips smacking whenever they met or parted took over your brain. Such sweet, velvety kisses were exchanged all night long between pants, between moans, between soft words you and Sanji murmured to each other, between thrusts of Sanji's hips. That incredible high wreaked havoc in your brain when Sanji thrusted over and over into your hips. Your toes curled, you wrapped your arms tightly around him and dug your nails into his back. You begged for him to go faster and harder, but in response you only got a low chuckle from the cook that embarrassed you and exhilirated you deeply.

"I couldn't," he smirked against your skin, "I don't want to be rough and hurt you."

You grit your teeth, taking a moment to wipe the sweat from your forehead with the back of your hand. You let out a low growl as your hand grabbed his hair. This teasing from Sanji was so unexpected - you didn't know there was this side of him.

"Please!" you breathed out, "Just… for me? Please!" you whined.

"Well, who am I to deny such a lady's request?"

Sanji seemed to really enjoy your whining because with that, he catered to your whim and every one after that. He was such a great listener. Sanji continued on and on until you had reached your final high of that evening and climaxed. The room spun, your body feeling hot and heavy. The two of you collapsed onto the bed in the girls' room, taking a few moments of peaceful silence to catch your breaths until you both had relaxed a bit more. You were incredibly thankful your crewmates had gone into town and left you and Sanji to guard the ship alone because you two had laid for a long time in bed after that. Just talking about your dreams, about life, anything really. It felt like hours, and in actuality it really was.

When you finally told Sanji you wanted to get dressed, he got up before you could even fling the sheets over your body. With a wave of his hand, he promptly stated he would make you a pot of tea. He got dressed and then was out the door. You waited until he was completely out of the room before your smile faded into a frown.

So stupid.

You should have known you were going to fall hard for the cook. This kept up for some time. Once a week turned into a couple times a week and then several times a week. You and Sanji kept it secret pretty well. It was something to look forward to as hard as it was to find the privacy. Soon, these little flirty instances were beginning to appear - like a secret signal. You'd sneak past Sanji to cup your hand to his ass to give him a hint you were hungry. He would smirk at you more often.

But hold on - what in the world was wrong with you?

The plan was not to become romantically attached. And the exact opposite of that was happening! You were head over heels. Sanji made you feel so special, and he geninely enjoyed the time spent with you. You were learning all sorts of things about each other and forming a closer bond.

You know what was even more stupid? You literally could not act like a normal person in front of Sanji anymore. Sometimes you dodged him and walked the other way if you ran into him, which was quite often as you were stuck on a ship for most of the time. Your confident vixen attitude was shaken - you couldn't dare touch his cute butt again. You would avoid his gaze. When he passed you a plate at dinner and your fingers accidentally brushed, you would mentally scream in your mind. It took all the strength not to fall apart.

Oh, but why was this happening?!

What were you afraid of? Being emotionally hurt? Afraid of how much of a ladies man he was if you wanted to start a relationship? You could tell Sanji was becoming concerned because you asked for him less and less until it just stopped one day. Everyone could tell you weren't acting normal as you would coop yourself up in the girls room - denying Luffy if he asked you to come play, taking your meals by yourself amongst other little things. Everyone came to check on you. Even Chopper was the most concerned, thinking you were sick. And Chopper was right, but it was lovesickness, and there was nothing he could do to help. It took everything to shoo everyone away.

Oh, but that Robin - who was too smart for her own good sometimes - had finally found you sneaking off to the kitchen one night for a late snack. She could not have been sleeping if she noticed you left the room and then somehow notify Sanji. It wasn't a surprise that she knew. Initially you would have been mortified, but if it had to be Robin then you felt at ease.

So you were digging around in the fridge, not even noticing Sanji entered the room until he called your name. This caused you to flinch and, in attempts to stand up suddenly, you hit your head on the nearest shelf in the fridge. Promplty, you slammed the door shut and gave him a forced grin. Sanji was no fool though. As you reluctantly greeted him and made a mad dash for the door, he swiftly stepped over to block it as you bumped headfirst into him. Sanji looped one arm around your waist as the other caught your wrist when you pressed your arms up to his chest to push him off.

You could feel your face heating up and your heart thundering in your ears. For a few seconds, you both stood there in awkward sielnce, waiting for somebody to do something.

"Are you… avoiding me?"

Sanji wasted no time in getting to the point. You didn't like how he asked that question - he sounded so hurt. Your lips trembled, and you felt so damn frustrated that you could cry then and there. You never wanted to hurt him! But it's not like you had anywhere special to go, so… you realized you probably should explain yourself.

"Yes." you answered quietly.

Sanji let out a deep sigh, and he moved so that he could grab both your arms. Gently, he pulled you away from him to stare into your eyes. He gasped when he saw you actually were crying. You sniffled and frowned at him, brows furrowed together in dismay as you waited for him to speak. It was as if he instantly knew. As soon as Sanji spoke, he was referring to the current status of your relationship.

"Did I do something wrong? Did I hurt you, my angel?"

"No!" you responded immediately, "No… you've been perfect. I just…" Sanji leaned forward, using his finger to gently wipe the tears collecting at your lower eyelid. It was cheesy, it was cute, it was freaking great! You grabbed his hand and turned your head from him.

"This!" you squeezed his hand, "This… stuff you do. I can't keep lying to myself anymore."

Were you making sense? It was all garbled. You finally let go of Sanji's hand, only to have him move his hands to the base of where your jaw met your neck. He tilted your head upwards to look at him. You knew you were making no sense, but Sanji stayed calm and cool.

"What do you mean? You know you can tell me anything."

You let out a sigh, mustering up the courage to look him straight in the eye.

"Look, I really, really like you. I said no strings attached… but I changed my mind. I want more. I want us to go on a date. I want us to actually be together."

With that you snapped your eyes shut, fearing of how he might respond. Would he be okay with that? This man who craved any woman? You waited for what seemed like an eternity, but when you felt his hand cup the side of your face and motion you to look up at him… you realized there was such a look in his eyes that was indescribable.

"I would love nothing more than to be yours."

A smile lit up your tear-stricken face as you clapped your hands over his - still gently caressing your face, "Really?"

Sanji gently pulled your face closer, a smirk playing at his lips.

"Really."

There was a pause.

"What a relief!"

And Sanji gasped when you suddenly grabbed the back of his head to smash your lips against his. He melted into the kiss, but when you released him after a few seconds - he had the biggest grin. You just stared at him so sweetly, brushing a strand of his golden locks from his face as he stood in awe like a lovesick fool.

"So… can we…? You know? I mean, unless you don't want to!"

You stroked his cheek with your thumb and let out a sigh after a roll of your eyes. Oh, Sanji - the poor thing. You had him on a leash, and he worshipped the ground you walked on. As you gently grabbed his hand and led him to the door, you smirked.

"You're lucky I like you so much."

[bucky-bucket-barnes]

more! headcanons! please!

bucky getting used to modern crap headcanon

considering Bucky is over 100 years old, your boyfriend is more with the times than people give him credit for

socially he's quite progressive, but a lot of other things, he tends to be fuzzy on

food for starters

that man acts like he is scared of any other seasonings besides salt and pepper

"doll, you barely touched your dinner, are you upset?" / "i already told you im not eating boiled chicken :)" / "well now i'm upset :')"

the first time you took him to mcdonalds, you thought he was going to black out

"why does the soDA HURT" / "told you not to order the sprite" / "it's sprite, it's not supposed to feel like i'm drinking engine fuel"

also, tech. he was also very bad at tech

"yeah, so i have my bluetooth-" / "you have a what?" / ". . .bluetooth headphones" / "are you. . . do we need to go to a hospital?" / "bucky what are you talking about" / "your tooth is blue and you're talking to me like i'm the crazy one" / "did you miss the headphones part"

also the dishwasher for some reason?

you thought it was sweet that he always insisted on washing the dishes until you realized he had an ulterior motive

it was when you caught him rewashing the plates you tossed in the washer that you said something

"buck, i already washed those :)" / "i knew this day would come :'|" / "what?" / "it's the dishwasher" / "is there something wrong with it?" / "i just don't get it" / "explain" / "people throw anything in these things, i'm not cleaning my dishes in that" / "baby, it's safe-" / "want to know what else is dishwasher safe? dildos! i don't want sex water on my pasta- stop laughing i'm being serious."

okay, most of the time it led to funny situations so it was fine

like that one week where bucky would end every text with a picture of a heart until you explained to him what emojis were

or that other time he tried to secretly order you flowers while on a mission using his phone

bucky accidentally ordered a dozen bouquets of roses instead of twelve dozen roses

he tried to play it off like it was on purpose, but you knew by his confused look when the third bouquet showed up that he had fucked up

the best, though, was when peter showed him twitter

he was as fascinated as he was confused

"honey, do you think i'm babygirl?" / (choking on water noises) / "well, stevesnipple on twitter said sometimes a grown man is babygirl. am i?" / ". . .yeah, honey" / "fuckin' knew it, sam's gonna be so jealous"

or that time he kept using the word stan wrong

"i stan you ;)" / "im begging you to stop saying words you don't know how to use, that is the cringiest thing you have ever said" / "is being a super fan of my girlfriend a crime now? blocked and canceled" / "omG"

or that time he kept using tea in inappropriate situations

"and after that, i lost my arm :(" / "babe, i'm so sorry-" / "and that's the tea :,("

okay, so a lot of shit confused him, but he didn't mind

he thought it was a great excuse to ask you for help without sounding needy so you two could just hang out <3

[misojunnie]

can i request this?

https://www.tumblr.com/misojunnie/728375539407159296/i-find-the-vampire-and-werewolf-rivalry-dynamic

but instead of vampires it's witch/warlock/wizard please?

☆ &team as your werewolf bf! w/ a witch (or warlock) partner :)

ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅ʚϊɞ.

byun eui joo - ej

is very unserious about you being a witch

when you finally confessed his first question was to ask if you could cast a spell on him that gave him super strength

he's so easy going n sweet :( got very quickly acclimated to the magical door slamming, floating pots and pans, etc

"honey, next time you summon a goetic demon, can you please make sure he's gone by dinnertime?"

murata fuma - fuma

quite surprised you were a witch; probably made an awful pun to cover up his shock

will easily lay his life down to protect you from the people who are prejudiced against you, even if its a fellow werewolf

you love your man <3 someone tried to jump him once and you cursed them for all of eternity

"can you do the dishes tonight? and please don't bring them to life on accident again."

koga yudai- k

tried to scare you away with garlic when he found out, and you had to tell him that only works on vampires

despite his initial shock, he quickly got accustomed to your habits

read the entire wikipedia page on witches so he'd be "well informed of all your needs"

makes an awful witch themed pun at least once a week, ex: "witch, please."

wang yixiang- nicholas

found out you were a witch like a week before you broke the news

^ secretly peeked into your bedroom one time and saw you curling your hair with a levitating curling iron, but decided to say nothing until you were ready

hates it when you put spells on him, eg; "I'm leaving, and if you even try to immobilize me, y/n, I swear to god-"

has asked you to curse ta-ki more than once or twice

nakakita yuma - yuma

he thinks it's hot

asks you to put spells on him so he can walk on the ceiling, which you continually tell him don't exist

tried to prank you once and you used magic to throw him through six layers of drywall on instinct

safe to say he hasn't tried to prank you since

asakura jo - jo

didn't even believe you at first, his first reply was "oh, really? then where's your big hat?"

it took you a week to convince him that it wasn't a prank, and he only believed you after you sent him through space and time

always takes care of you after you exhaust yourself from casting too many spells

found out you were ironically terrified of the conjuring and still makes fun of you for it

shigeta harua - harua

was shocked at first, but quickly came around when he realized how wonderful your magic could be

always wants to hear witch lore and all the stories about your covens and history

was suspicious you put a love spell on him but eventually realized that he just loves you a lot. damn.

hates when you make him clean because he knows you could easily do it with magic

ta-ki

poor baby went into actual shock when you told him you were a witch, but he had no complaints

genuinely had no idea that witches existed

"wait, so do you have warts and stuff? no judgement."

is still amazed every time you do a spell, even years later

hirota riki - maki

his only knowledge of witches comes from playing minecraft

"so wait, you don't live in a hut? not even a swamp?"

when he gets too hyper you cast a spell on him that glues him to the wall or something (comes in handy when you need to study)

asks you to summon demons just to do his homework

ॱ⋅.˳˳.⋅ॱᐧ.˳˳.⋅ʚϊɞ.

a/n: sorry for this super late reply! I have very little knowledge of witches so I hope I did this request justice ;-; this was sooo fun

[annisassintchaska]

Daddy's Always Here: Lewis Hamilton X Black!Reader

NOTE: Lele is pronounced Lee-lee

The night is very cold as the time was approaching Christmas, so everyone had to be covered up to keep warm. Lewis was able to be at home during the week to spend some time with Y/n and his daughter, Leah Hamilton; however he had to leave for the last few races of the season. The little Hamilton was very sad that her daddy was leaving again, but promised to still cheer for him while he was on the track.

It was a couple of minutes after 8pm when Lewis returned back to the apartment that was given to him for his stay while in Barcelona as he had some extra things to go over. He decided that since he was lonely from leaving Roscoe at home, he would call to speak with his family. Lewis retrieved the telephone from his pocket and clicked on his Y/n's number to start the facetime; however after a the call was answered he was surprised to see his daughter instead of his wife. "Hi daddy, how are you?!" Asked the fully-energized toddler. "Hi baby, daddy's doing great. How are you and where is mommy?" Lewis asked confused to why his wife was nowhere in sight. "Mommy went to the kitchen to clean up the dishes. Should I give her the phone?" The smart baby asked as her father nodded his head yes.

Little footsteps could be heard until a voice broke out "Leah, you can't be running on the tiles with socks. You'll fall and hurt yourself" Y/n softly spoke to her daughter as she lifts her onto the counter. "Sorry mommy, daddy is on the phone and he wanted to see you" the toddler explains as she showed her mommy the phone. "Hi babe, you look tired. Why are you out in the cold?" Y/n questioned her husband. "Yeah, I'm a bit tired. Just got back from the track and thought I'd check in to see how my beautiful family is doing" Lewis answered causing Y/n to blush. "Well Sir Lewis, if I must have you know, your family is doing quite fine just sad because we miss you being here with us" She replied making a smile appear on his face.

"Daddy, when are you coming home?" Leah asked sadly as she took the phone from her mother's hand. "Why are you asking pumpkin?" Lewis asked suspiciously as she had never asked that particular question before. "I just wanna see you. You go away very quickly after coming home and we don't have enough time for bedtime stories or cuddles anymore cause you are never at home. Daddy, do you love me?" The toddler asked on the verge of tears, shocking both parents as the baby had never mentioned feeling this way before. "Of course I love you Lele, you're my daughter. As you know I have to work to be able to take care you and mommy so I'm away a lot which is why when I'm at home, I try to spend as much time with you as possible. Please don't doubt my love for you my baby. I love you with all my life" Lewis explained as his heart was breaking at the words he heard.

"Tell you what, daddy doesn't have work tomorrow so how about you both stay on the phone until you fall asleep. He can read you a bedtime story and you both can talk about your day at school and your drawings yeah?" Y/n suggested making the toddler become excited. Throughout the time, Leah showed her daddy some pictures she drew and painted in class as they spoke about the meanings behind them, then they talked about her new teddy that grandpa Anthony gave her and what she named it. Eventually things winded down as Leah was put into her crib with the phone because Lewis wanted to speak with his baby before she fell asleep. "Leah, I want to let you know that I love you very much and I know it's hard for you to understand now that I'm away most of the time but I promise you that you and your mommy are always on my mind. I wish I could take you with me everywhere I go but that is impossible due to you having school. I want you to know that no matter where in the world I am from home, my heart is always with you. Daddy will always be here ok?" He asked as he daughter nodded her head in response. They moved onto the bedtime story where Lewis read until Leah fell asleep when Y/n came to get the phone.

"She really needed that talk." Y/n said as she walked towards her bedroom. "Yeah I know. I'll be coming home on a three hours flight tomorrow for the Christmas break. So we'll be spending a lot of ime together with her alright?" Lewis responded as Y/n became excited to have her husband back home. "Yeah, I'll make sure to keep the secret. I love you Lew" Y/n said as Lewis replied "I love you too Y/n/n" before the call ended. This specific night, Lewis went to sleep feeling jittery at the mere thought of reuniting with his family.

[aley-nag]

Making my own bookcloth

Back in february I went to a convention for all kinds of crafts and found a lot of cool materials I wanted to try in lieu of bookcloth. This was my first foray:

Finished book!

In a workshop back in 2023 I learned how to back normal cloth with silk paper so that it can function as bookcloth. I was taught, that this is necessary because otherwise the glue would press through the cloth and be visible on the front. With this dragon scale styled cloth I wasn't afraid that would happen. It is very thick and has kind of a plasticky coat. So I disregarded all of that advise and just tried to do it like I would with regular bookcloth:

I noticed very quickly that the cloth kinda soaked up the glue and I needed a lot to get it wet and sticky enough. Than I ran into the problem, that my newly fashioned edge cutter was a little to narrow for such thick material. I had little holes at the corner where the cloth didn't quite overlap. It also would not really stick to the carton. First I tried pressing it down with my fingers, than with a vise. Nothing worked, it just wouldn't stick. That's how I learned there's a second reason for backing the cloth: So that it will fucking stick. The glue is not suitable for things that are not paper. So you have to adhere paper first to the cloth and then you can connect that paper to the carton.

This is how I learned to do it:

Iron the cloth until all the creases are gone. Otherwise they will stay permanently. Leave the iron on. Dilute your glue with wallpaper paste (I used the regular one for paper from a hardware store and used the strongest water/paste ratio; the paste/glue ratio I kinda eyeballed approx. 1:3). Then put it in a laquer dish like in the picture and use a roller without this really fuzzy stuff (this one is more like foam). This will help you put the glue on very quickly and evenly. Lay out the silk paper (normally you should measure the cloth larger than you need it and the silk paper a little smaller than the cloth so that you don't have glue remnants everywhere. I already cut mine so the silk paper is larger here). Roll on your glue (very quickly but make it thin and even). Then wait. Test it with your fingertips. It should still stick but not be really wet anymore. Otherwise it will press through your cloth and you will have stains. If it gets to dry it will not stick. Then carefully stretch out all the creases. If you think it is right, put on the cloth, flip it and go over the silk paper with an iron. Be careful not to rip the paper (this will happen if it was still to wet). Check that the cloth isn't creasing. Try to get it as flat as possible. After the paper is dry, flip it again and go over the cloth side.

After I did that I had less problems. The cloth still needed to be pressed with a vise because it was so thick, but it held.

I mismeasured the back of the bookblock though and had to do it all over again... Well, you learn through practise and the second attempt was much prettier as well.

I used marbled paper I got from that retailer from hell and then I again fucked up with the Cricut (forgot to mirror the letters). Otherwise I am very pleased with the result and my cousin (the recipient) was also quite happy.

Binding Details

Bookblock was premade from schmedt.de

Endpapers from the retailer from hell (that I'm not gonna link)

Cloth from taschen-zubehoer.de

[fatuismooches]

Hold! Let me cook!

So, realistically, well not even that, it's a fact - language evolves and dramatically changes over the years, compare how we talk in this age to the letters of the past for example! The way we word things, how we formulate our sentences and the meaning behind them evolves with the context of current events, as in the use of modern slang compared to let's say, 1920s slang where they called alcohol "giggle water."

Now what am I on about? Well, I thought that hey: being comatosed for almost 500 years would surely mess up your communication, your words would be dated after all.

So here's the dish: Fragile!reader wakes up after 500 years, and can't understand a single lick of what anyone is saying.

A century passing = new slang and terms

Two centuries passing = grammar would have changed, but you could still hold a conversation

Anything past that? That's a new language! (See ye olden English from the medieval period, old English doesn't sound like our English!)

Poor fragile!reader spouting a dead language (old Sumerian) and the only one that understands is Dottore—

And, since their grammar would be different, the length they would speak would be different too! A bit hard to explain so:

[Reader: *Is speaking for a good thirty seconds*

*Confused cicin mage nodding along.*

Dottore, translating: "Your hair looks nice."]

Language anon here I just read your most recent post I served a cold-dish, room temperature, you were already on it 😭 I'm just gonna 🚪🏃‍♂️

ANON PLEASE, DON'T WORRY I LOVE THIS ASK SM 💗 And I was actually very much inspired by an anon right here so if anything, I'm also serving a cold dish as well 😭 But you're so right, the language of Teyvat has definitely changed a lot! From the way it's written, to new words, to old ones being now unused, pronunciation, and all that! Fragile reader was in for a shock for sure, because they would hear the segments and Dottore speaking in complete gibberish, and then switch back to the old language just for you. To reader, perhaps it's obvious that the language would no longer be the same but... it really hits them seeing it be so different right in front of them. You'd probably freak out a bit, considering literally no one can understand you, nor can you understand them.

Besides your lover, of course. Good thing he's a genius and made sure to preserve the old language for this day, and also program it into his segments. Thankfully, they are all quite patient in the process, as switching between languages is a piece of cake for them. I imagine you try very hard to learn certain words and phrases (how does one flirt in modern Teyvat? did courtship change much in 400+ years...? 🤔) in order to surprise him. Just don't do it too quickly... he will flirt back in much more advanced language that you don't quite understand yet and he'll laugh at your frustrated face. (AND READER TRYING TO BEFRIEND HER BY COMPLIMENTING HER BUT FAILING MISERABLY... you've been trying very hard for so long until he finally took pity on you.)

I imagine sometimes the two of them get jumbled together when you're feeling strong emotions, so only a select few people can really understand you. Sometimes, you still speak to Dottore in old Sumerian, if only to recall the old days.

[matryosika]

Day 13. Throat fucking + Spit + Snowballing with Minho

Wordcount — 4,148 words

Includes — Fem reader, established relationship, mentions of stress. Alcohol consumption and (implied) smoking. Dirty talk, use of petnames (pretty), oral sex (m. receiving), handjob, deepthroating, throatfucking, drool and spit, snowballing, cum eating.

Author's Note — This is as nasty as it is romantic, and I completely enjoyed writing and building up the plot for this, I don't know why! It all felt very intimate for me, and I hope I portrayed such intimacy in this drabble haha. I know it took me a while to post something, but I'm happy I was able to finally find some time to write! I hope you like this a lot.

Please remember that english is not my first language, so I apologize for any mistakes in advance!

It's been a few weeks since Minho hasn't come home before 10.

Life is quite busy these days, that you understand. However, you can’t help but feel nostalgic when you remember those times where your boyfriend worked from home, spending as much quality time with you as he could. The day-to-day was easier those times as well.

When Minho started working at the company, face-to-face, again, things weren’t as they are right now —his schedules were alright, work wasn’t as overwhelming and the dynamic worked. However, in most recent times, you can tell things are getting difficult in the company he works at; with the end of the year just around the corner, it seems as if everyone is feeling pressure to get all their tasks, duties and responsibilities done before winter break. This means more work, more hours at the office, less hours of sleep and less intimacy with your boyfriend.

So tonight, when you hear the dim sound of the keypad lock unlocking your apartment door, it’s impossible not to feel an eerie sensation of happiness.

“I’m home,” he tells you, as if it isn’t obvious.

He always does so, and it’s like his very own way to remind himself that he has reached his safest place —a place away from the stressful work and the overwhelming routines. 

“It’s quarter past eight,” you frown your eyebrows in confusion, as if Minho’s check-out time isn’t originally 7:30 p.m. These days it isn’t usual for him to get out of work at the appropriate hour, so this is a bit of a shock.

“I’m very glad to see you too,” he teases you sarcastically, cupping your face with both hands and planting a kiss on your forehead. 

“Hey, I didn’t mean it that way,” you playfully hit him. “I’m just curious how you managed to escape work today”.

“I didn’t technically escape,” as he is speaking, he practically removes every single piece of clothing he no longer needs —from his suit jacket and tie to his belt, he leaves everything at the coat rack next to the door. “I finished everything in time for once, so I ran as fast as I could from the building”.

“You’re taking those with you later,” you tell him, pointing at the now messy hallway area. “I just picked up your sweaty gym clothes this morning”. 

Minho fakes a frustrated groan and follows you into the kitchen slowly, dragging his feet along the floor. “Yes mom!”

You smile fondly while he sits at the dinner table, legs spread and a few buttons of his white shirt opened.  

“I haven’t made dinner,” you murmur, somewhat in embarrassment. The household chores have always been shared between you, ever since you started living together —cooking it’s not something you always have to do as Minho can cook for himself (and fairly well!) but you wish you had received him tonight with a nice meal. Of course, you didn’t know he was coming early but had you known, you would have welcomed him with his favorite dish. 

“Actually,” he sighs, standing up from the dinner table and walking towards your figure, hugging you from behind tightly while you fix him a glass of red wine,“I want to take advantage of the fact that I got home early  to cook us something”. 

Cooking might seem something laborious and exhausting, but Minho finds the culinary arts to be exactly the opposite —instead of stressing him out, they relax him. He thrives on cooking for the people he loves, and the gratification he receives is not only compliments but the whole process. 

“You sure?” you ask, feeling his lips attached to your shoulder while he wraps his arms around you. He smells like lavender, mint and the tiniest pinch of cigarette smoke —his fragrance, combined with the warmth of his body and the meaningful moment, reminds you that you’re a lucky person. “If you wait a little longer, I can cook us something. Or if you’re really hungry, I can order take out from your favorite place”. 

“Pretty, I’ve been dying all week to cook for you,” he murmurs against your skin breathing in profoundly while he inhales the remains of your favorite perfume. “Why don’t you let me take care of this?”

“Alright,” you hesitate, but you know he means the whole thing —cooking is his favorite hobby these days, so it’s only reasonable that he wants to sublimate his stress by participating in it. “Can I help you with anything?”

“Just sit there and look pretty,” he jokes, taking the glass of wine from your hands and the kitchen counter. “Tell me about your day, or how much you’ve been missing me these days, or how incredibly handsome and hot I am”. 

“Right,” you scoff, turning around and planting a kiss on the tip of his nose. “I’ll fix the hallway and coat rack again while you cook”. 

“Yes,” he grins in victory, content with the fact that he won’t have to do it himself. Minho performs every house chore fairly well, but organizing or cleaning stuff it’s not something he enjoys as much as cooking or doing the laundry. “You do that, baby”.

Albeit his will to cook dinner, Minho opted for a quick dish —a delicious pasta, accompanied with a glass of wine. He was hungry, and even though cooking it’s an activity he enjoys, he was really looking forward to spending time with you tonight.

So you had dinner together, chatted for a while and while you washed the dishes, Minho went to run a warm bath for the two of you. The weather in Seoul is getting colder these days, as Christmas is approaching —a warm bath seemed adequate tonight.

For about an hour, the whole world vanishes for you and your boyfriend as you sit at the bathtub together, letting the water wash away the stress of the day. Most of the time you spend it in silence, not because there’s nothing to say but because you both enjoy the quietness and presence of each other —it’s not awkward or uncomfortable, but quite the opposite.

“Today was a good day,” you tell him, kicking your head back so it rests on his shoulder. “We should do this more often”.

“Tell that to my boss,” Minho jokes, scoffing bitterly. There’s lingering annoyance in his voice, as he is being reminded of injustices that happen at his workplace, but he doesn't let that memory ruin the moment. “I really can’t wait for Christmas break. I’ll make sure to spend all my days like this with you”.

“We are almost there,” there’s still a couple of weeks before Minho’s days off, but the promising future is enough motivation for him to bear the day-to-day, “In a blink of an eye we will be in Gimpo without worries for a couple of days.”

He sighs profoundly, fantasizing about all the things you are going to do there. “I hope these weeks go by quickly,” he kicks his head back softly until it meets the cold, white tiles of the wall. “Work is okay, I mean- it’s sure a lot but nothing I can’t handle. I just miss being with you, it feels like forever since the last time we spent the night together”.

“I know,” you exhale deeply, shrinking between his arms.

Minho’s preferred love languages have always been physical touch and quality time, so you understand his frustration.

“How was work for you today, though?” he asks you, shaking his head in hopes of removing some of his personal thoughts. “I haven’t asked you today”.

“It was good,” you smile. “Really calm and quiet, nothing out of the ordinary”.

“Might as well quit my job and join the bakery with you,” he murmurs, his words being muffled by his lips attached to your naked shoulder. “You bake and I decorate everything with frosting —cakes, cookies, cupcakes…”

“I can imagine the showcase filled with jureumi decorated pastries,” the thought makes you crack a soft chuckle; it’s as absurd as hilarious.

“Well, the most important part with baking is having fun with it,” he attacks, mostly offended by the way you predicted his performance.

“And you look like you could use some fun these days,” you tell him, implying a dirty meaning behind your words.

“If you want to fuck just say so,” he scoffs, stretching his body to reach a pair of towels. “Don’t have to throw hints at me, pretty”.

The evening has been great so far —he came home earlier than usual, you had an amazing dinner and even made some time to take a bath together, something you hadn’t done in a couple of weeks.

There was no more perfect way to end the night than fucking, but as exciting as that is, it is also very tiring.

“It’s a Thursday,” you remind him, turning just slightly to face him. “And you have to be up at 6 in the morning. Don’t want you falling asleep at your workplace”.

“Ever heard of coffee?” you hit him playfully, and join him getting out of the bathtub. He doesn’t offer you a towel but rather helps you dry yourself up, dragging the cloth along your body and letting you wrap it on your hair.

“I’m not putting you through that,” you pick another towel from the rack and wrap it around your body, watching delighted as Minho wraps his around his waist.

“You saying so makes sex seems like a torture,” your boyfriend teases you, pushing his wet hair out of his face. “What do you mean you don’t want to put me through that?”

“Well, you have work early tomorrow and sex can be exhausting sometimes,” you clarify, walking towards your toothbrush near the sink. “Plus, I know you’re already tired. I'd feel shitty if I made you wear yourself out even more”.

“I'm never too exhausted for sex with you, though,” he smirks, joining you in the sink.

The thing with Minho, that can be a good trait as a negative one, is how pleasing he can be —he always goes out of his way to satisfy you, even if that implies leaving aside his desires or needs.

On the other hand, though, he has a high sex drive, so you do believe the “I’m never too exhausted for sex with you” thing because he has proven so many times that it is true. But tonight, you know he needs to rest, so you are trying to persuade him into that.

“You can prove that to me during the weekend,” you tell him, spitting out toothpaste and water into the sink. You fill your mouth with water again and repeat the process a couple of times, Minho doing the same thing. “But right now, we are going to sleep”.

He whines and you palm his shoulder after leaving the toothbrush in its holder. In the meantime, you continue your night-time routine in your shared bedroom —you get changed, brush and dry your hair and apply some lotion all over your face and body.

He gets in the room not too long after, and does the same —fixes his hair, puts on a pair of sweatpants and applies your body lotion too.

It’s a common occurrence: he has a whole drawer filled with body and skincare products he buys, but he always ends up using your stuff.

Not that you care, though, but you’ve always found it hilarious.

“Make room,” you tell him, pushing his body away from your side of the bed. It takes him a couple of whines but he finally gets to his side of the bed, pulling the sheets on top of him and getting comfortable there.

You join him inside, being welcomed by the warmth of his body and the coziness of the blankets. It doesn’t take him long to settle right behind you, making you the little spoon —he places an arm on top of your body and, because he has the chance, places a wet peck on your shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” he exhales afterwards, out of the blue, making you furrow your eyebrows in confusion.

“Huh?”

“Sorry I can’t be around as much as I want and as much as you need me to,” Minho explains, and you abruptly turn around to face him.

“Hey,” you whisper, one of your hands reaching up to cup his cheek. “I’m not complaining”.

“I know, but you should,” his eyebrows furrow too, upset lingering in his voice. “Moments like this remind me how caught up in work I am, and how lonely you must feel at times because I’m not around”.

There’s no lie in Minho’s words, but you know it is not his fault at all.

“I don’t want our relationship to be a burden,” you comfort him, the warmth of your palm makes him close his eyes, “as much as I would love to have you all for myself, I understand there are other important things we need to balance”.

Minho sighs profoundly, somehow feeling a weight lifted off.

“Plus,” you smile, softly chuckling in advance to the comment you’re about to make. “That anniversary gift you got me kind of helps with bearing the loneliness”.

His half-lidded eyes shoot you a taunting gaze.

“Is it good?” he asks, bringing back to his memory the dildo he gifted you. You nod and he hisses. “Better than me?”

“Of course not!” you protest, forcing his face against yours and planting a wet peck on his lips. When you do so, he holds you closer to him, decreasing the space between your bodies, and what was once an innocent peck, turns into a heated kiss. “No one is better than you”.

“I don’t know,” he murmurs between kisses, breath hitching in anticipation. “I’m starting to think you use that toy more than my cock”.

Albeit your thoughts earlier tonight, you can’t stop yourself from craving him.

“Jealous?”

“Maybe a little,” Minho reveals, his arms still wrapped around your waist even when you try to lay flat on the bed again. “I can’t go a day without thinking about how good it feels to be inside you”.

“Minho,” you wish to stand by your original statement —you don’t want him to feel exhausted. But when you start feeling his wet lips against your neck, lazily kissing it, you try to abstain. “We better get to sleeping if you don't want to have trouble waking up tomorrow morning”.

“Mhm,” he hums, pretending to hear what you say.

“I mean it,” you coo, words slightly breaking in quiet whimpers. “Come on”.

“I miss you so much,” your boyfriend whines quietly, the sound of his voice being muffled by his lips against your neck. “I need you”.

You tangle your fingers onto his hair, softly pulling it while he nibbles at your sensitive skin. You need him too, probably just as much as he does.

“Hey,” you whisper, feeling dizzy at the sounds he makes when kissing your skin —sloppy, messy, yet erotic and romantic all-together, “baby”.

Oh, how weak he is for that pet name.

“Yes?”

He withdraws from your body and, judged by his gaze, you can tell he is tired. But the spark of lust and desire is still there, even after a long, exhausting day.

“Let me take care of this”.

When you tell him that, he agrees immediately —he feels as if this is the grand prize to an excruciatingly tiring and productive week. As pleasing as he can be, he can’t help but feel relief.

“Are you sure?”

“Just relax,” you soothe him, cupping his face while caressing his cheeks. “I want to make you feel better”.

He swallows thickly, anticipating whatever it is you feel like doing tonight. So you kiss him one last time before switching your position on the bed, crawling to where you need to be with your knees against the mattress and your clothes slightly out of place due to Minho’s mischief.

“You always make me feel better,” he murmurs, eyes fixed on your hands —they move cunningly along his body, stroking every inch of his abdomen. “Always make me feel so fucking good”.

“I try my best,” you giggle, lowering his underwear just enough to release his already hardened cock. For once you’re glad he doesn't like to sleep with clothes on, it makes everything easier.

“And you always succeed, pretty,” he compliments you, pushing his elbows and forearms against the mattress while straightening his body so he can see you well.

“Thanks,” you wrap your hand around the base, guiding your lips to the tip without actually making contact with it. You have the biggest smile plastered on your face, feeling flattered by his compliments.

You don’t mean to tease him but it comes naturally —it’s all part of the moment. Although you desire to move forward as fast as you can, you can’t help but get too lost in the moment, slowly giving yourself to him.

You stroke him a couple of times before taking him all in your mouth, one of your hands gripping the base of his cock while the other rests on top of his thigh.

“Fuck,” he sighs profoundly, head falling back in defeat, “so fucking warm”.

The thing you like best about Minho is how sensitive and vocal in bed he is. One touch, one grip or one stroke and he is already melting underneath you, grinding his hips against the mattress while murmuring the sweetest and nastiest things to you.

You have your mouth full, so all you do is nod in response, eyes closed and eyebrows furrowed while you train your throat to adjust to his length tonight —the first moments going down on him are always a challenge, not matter how many times you’ve let him fuck your mouth before.

“Your throat forgot me already?” he asks with a cocky scoff, though his shaky breath and gulped words are telling a different story. You’re struggling to take him but, in your defense, it has been a while since the last time you’ve gone down on him.

A while as in a couple of days, but a while nonetheless.

“Never,” you gasp quietly when you are finally able to breath, watery eyes blinking fast in hopes of retrieving full vision, “it's just it has been so long since I’ve tasted you”.

Your tongue swirls around the tip of his length seductively, teasing every inch of it before taking all of him inside your mouth one more time. You bop your head on it rhythmically, up and down while your hands stroke whatever doesn’t fit in your mouth and play with his testicles, teasing and squeezing them ever so slightly just as he likes it.

“Pretty,” he breathes, hazy eyes staring at the ceiling of your room with his mouth ajar, “god”.

He doesn’t ask you to stop, but his body stiffs abruptly and the movement of his hands get lost in the midst. One suddenly gets to your hair, and you start noticing the hesitation behind his actions.

“Pretty,” he repeats again, fingers latching onto your scalp.

“Yes, baby?”

There’s clearly something he wants, but it is taking him forever to voice it out loud.

“Can I please fuck your throat?”

It’s just not something you usually do, hence the hesitation.

Surely, you’ve gave him oral sex countless of times, even deepthroating has been on the table for as long as you’ve been dating him, but throatfucking it’s not a practice you usually do.

“I’ll be gentle,” he adds, interrupting the thoughtful silence surrounding the room.

You don’t have to think too much before nodding compliantly, the grip on your hair tightening as he guides your mouth to the tip of his cock yet again.

“Open wide for me,” Minho asks you, softly biting on his lower lip, while he cautiously guides every single one of your movements. Helped by the grip on your hair, he pushes your head down on him, forcing you to swallow every inch of his dick until the tip of it hits your throat. “Just like- fuck”.

He holds your head in place for a while, until your nails dig into the flesh of his thighs and he takes it as a sign to let you breathe. When you finally gasp for air, and swallow thickly the remains of your own drool, Minho asks you if it was too much.

“I’m fine,” you shake your head enthusiastically, albeit your struggle to speak. “Keep on going”.

He loses no time in gathering your hair into a messy ponytail yet again, pushing your head down his cock until the tip of your nose brushes against his pubis —this time around, though, he makes you bottom out and then forces you up, repeating the same movement at a steady pace.

“Pretty,” he moans, his shakily breathing sounding like music to your ears.

All you can do is look at him, and that is already a hard task on its own —the way he is stretching your throat is making you gag around it, and maintaining both your eyes open seems impossible at times.

Still, Minho seems to enjoy the sight.

“Make a mess on it,” he doesn’t necessarily fucks you faster, but each time he pushes your head down further, “drool all over it, show me how much you’ve missed it”.

The deeper he fucks your throat, the more you salivate —fulfilling his desire is such an easy task when it comes naturally, so you don’t refuse. Instead, you take him in eagerly, focusing on relaxing your throat and not holding yourself back.

He guides your head away from his length and allows you to breathe fully, inhaling deeply while you watch him smear your own drool along his length with some gentle strokes.

“Spit on it,” Minho asks you, one hand wrapped around the base of his cock while the other is pushing a few pieces of your hair away from your face. By now you’re both a mess, and you’d probably want to bathe again, but it doesn't matter.

You do as you’re being asked and spit on his cock, wetting it even more than it already is. Your hand reaches out to replace his, and you start smearing your own fluids eagerly, jerking him off while he watches you.

“I’m not going to last long,” he warns you with strangled words, wrapping his hand around your wrist.

“You don’t have to,” you decrease your ministrations and stare at him with a smile, one that makes his cock twitch visibly in front of your eyes. “You can come whenever you want”.

You lean down to take his cock in your mouth again and he follows you instinctively, returning to the original dynamic where he is controlling your movements and you’re allowing him to use your throat to get off.

This time around, though, everything feels sloppier and desperate, even his hips are grinding against your mouth as if he needed to go deeper. One of your hands squeezes his testicles while the other grips his thigh firmly, even smearing some of your own drool on them to provide even the slightest friction.

“Yes,” Minho groans, the muscles of his abdomen contracting while his breath gets caught up in his throat. “Fuck, all the way in”.

He places his feet against his mattress with his knees slightly bent, and that allows him to grind his hips against your face just at the same pace he is moving your head on his cock —the deeper he pushes your head, the more he raises his hips.

“Can I-”

“Mhm,” you hum, although the sound is muffled by his cock. Still, that’s all it takes him to finally allow himself to come undone inside your mouth, spurts of his hot cum filling your wet hole to the brim while his cock twitches over and over again.

“Fuck,” he curses under his breath, his eyes tightly shut while his chest is moving frantically, trying to catch some air but failing miserably.

In spite of your efforts to swallow all of his load, most of it ended up leaking when he guided your face away from his cock, his arousal dripping from your lips onto your chin and clean t-shirt.

“I’m sorry,” he breathes, his slim fingers collecting the semen from your chin just to push it back onto your mouth again. “Didn’t think I would come this much”.

“I’m not complaining,” you murmur with a victorious smile,

He doesn’t give you time to swallow his cum before pulling you close to him, crashing his lips against yours desperately while he wraps his arms around your waist. You kiss him back almost as eagerly, tongue brushing against his and giving him a taste of his own arousal, making him groan in the midst of it.

“I can’t wait to do this often,” he whispers in between kisses as you two share his cum, savoring it off of each other’s tongues.

“I can’t wait either, baby”.

[ainnur]

Not my normal vibe but Mermaid OC challege by @monkiart with my oc Ayu and @yingjiaoyue ' s oc Syaoron. Call them "ToxicRose". Ayu is siren in this and Syaoron still a seafood chef.

Yeah I suck at drawing scales and bg 😔

Anyway their story for this AU

ToxicRose [Siren AU]

In this AU Ayu is a siren from Mermaid Island [Yes that place exist at my country lol] . Mermaid and siren is both rival with same bad trait. Set in dark fantasy setting they both not safe in a hand of humans. Not only them but other magical sea creatures will be hunt by human to serve as meal.

Ayu was caught by human and brought to Syaoron's restaurant. At first Ayu tried to used her siren power to control Syaoron but that didn't work. She was place big aquariam before her time to be cook. But to her suprise that time didn't come. She heard she was supposed to be main dish for very big night. But that night something bad happend. Ayu doesn't really know what happend.

She can hear the chaos but never really understand what happend since she was locked anyway. The aquariam wasn't a normal one. It's was thick and coated with strong magic. Though it doesn't harm Ayu, it still trap her.

Ayu just swim around in aquariam waiting for her time. She heard that the night she was supposed to be cook was sabotage by someone. That person tried to ruin Syaoron's restaurant status by making it look bad. Somehow they manage to free a lot rats and cockroachs in one time and cause the flood in building. But somehow Syaoron got everything under control. The 'big' persons Syaoron have to serve wasn't please with what happend.

Somehow Ayu feel bad and impressed with Syaoron for that. With all the things that happend it's kinda leave bad taste in people mouth. Business have been slow Ayu would say. She heared the news by Syaoron workers when they talk to each other that the person cause the chaos other night was a weird looking man and a black monkey.......? Police still investigating about that.

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"Tertekan nampak" Ayu said to Syaoron as he give Ayu her meal of the day. Ayu got feed 3 times a day which wasn't bad. "Huh" Syaoron look distracted. "I said you look kinda stress" Ayu just chewing her fish. Syaoron looked Ayu with blank stare. This kinda their routine everyday for now. Syaoron came and give Ayu her food and Ayu tried to talk with Syaoron. Could say she was bored. She have nothing to do anyway. All she did was swim around a watch every worker and Syaoron through the aquariam glass.

"It's none of your business" Syaoron said could not bother with Ayu. "I can help you" Ayu said quickly. Syaoron just looked Ayu with questioning look. " I know...that business kinda slow lately...." It's worst actually maybe Syaoron restaurant have to be close because of the bad repotation they're having and all the worker start to wanting to quit . "You know I'm a siren right?...I can help you by using my power". Ayu bit hesitate to ask but she did it anyway. Syaoron wasn't stupid. Of course he know about how siren power work.

Syaoron looked away for a minute before looking back at Ayu. "What are you offering?". Syaoron asked fast with serious face. This time like this he is desperate. Ayu was cought off by that. She really wasn't expecting Syaoron consider he offer. "I'll help you got your customers back and in return you make people stop hunting creature at Mermaid Island. Just Mermaid Island, I don't care if want to hunt at other place." "And how are you gonna do that when you in here?" Syaoron asked. "I have a human disguise. Well... supposed to have . I just never try. But do we have a deal?" Ayu asked with awkward smile while give her hand to Syaoron. "Deal" Syaoron shake Ayu hand. Damn he really is desparate.

Finally Ayu is free..... with cost.

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Sorry this story kind boring. Can't think of any other idea for this au so this will do .

[eroticwound]

I love your thoughts on The Bear. Particularly the Berzatto siblings. I was wondering if you could talk about Mikey. And possibly his relationship with Richie. Outside of the internet when I talk to peers about the show people are quick to demonize or dislike Mikey. They cite his behavior with Lee and his taking part in ganging up on Carmy with Donna as reasons why. Also, how Richie was so desperate to get away from the beef.

I would love to hear your opinion about how this could be someone’s impression of Mikey. And how you would describe Mikey to someone who maybe isn’t seeing the whole picture? Or just how you would describe Mikey as a person in general.

And do you think his relationship with Richie was very one sided? Do you think it was always Mikey in the lead? I’ve read some fic that truly makes Mikey terrible to Richie.

Hi anon. Thanks for this incredibly thought out ask. Cannot emphasize enough how much I enjoy getting questions like this :)

Michael Berzatto is a complicated guy and he’s a guy we don’t get a lot of screen time with. That’s by design. He’s the character haunting this narrative. Mikey is the Laura Palmer of The Bear (I have that disease where I see everything through the prism of Twin Peaks), and as such we get to know him mostly through people’s grief. Through their imperfect memories. We’re left missing him just as much as any other character. And while I would love a feature length movie showing Mikey’s last days a la Fire Walk with Me, I very much doubt we will get that. So we’re left to figure out this complicated character with scraps.

For these reasons, I do get why people don't understand Mikey. As you mention, they are literally not given anything close to a whole picture. In fact the screen time we have most with him is during Fishes, when he is quite literally at his worst. If people only saw scenes where Carmen was yelling at people in the kitchen or where Richie was being sexist to Syd, I'm sure they'd have a poor opinion of them as well (in fact, being in this fandom after the first season, I can confirm that most of tumblr disliked Richie).

The healthiest we see Michael is in the Ceres flashback in season 1. He’s exactly how everyone describes him: loud, brash, funny. Both Carmy and Richie are just having the best time, completely immersed in the story he's telling. Even Nat’s having a great time, though both brothers stop her from adding raisins, which is Donna’s recipe for the dish they're making (side note, I find it so interesting that Nat is the one trying to follow their mom’s recipe. She's still trying to please Donna, to garner favor, whereas the boys, who Donna relies on in the kitchen and emotionally, feel fine deviating from Donna’s recipe). Even beyond the Ceres flashback, we do get flashes of what makes Mikey great in Fishes: the opening is him checking in on Natalie, he's really sweet and engaging with Carmen in the pantry, and even though Carmy doesn't take Mikey and Richie trying to set him up with Claire well, it's still proof that Mikey cares.

The thing is Mikey is mentally ill, like Donna and like Carmen. He’s dealing with some sort of chemical imbalance (depression or bipolar) on top of the severe parentification he got from Donna. I talk about it at length in my unfinished series delving into the partentification of the Berzatto siblings. As I point out in those posts, Mikey is actually the sibling getting the worst of the parentification, which is a form of abuse where there is a role-reversal between parent and child. Nat can't morph herself easily to accommodate Donna's dysfunction (she un-normalizes it), so she gets Donna's ire instead. Carmen was also parentified, especially when Mikey was out of the house growing up (they have such an age gap), but Mikey was the oldest. He has high EQ and can morph himself to accommodate Donna's dysfunction. It has in fact shaped him into the person he is. Which is someone who is trying to avoid all of the bad: bad outbursts from Donna, bad feelings from his siblings, bad reactions from outsiders to their family dynamic. He's also trying very hard to avoid the bad emotions he's feeling. Michael is looking to avoid all of this through any means necessary, which includes using alcohol and drugs. As I mention in that parentification meta series, using substances is quite literally the only way he's managing his distress.

I want to talk about each point you mention people citing as to why they don't like Michael. But first, I want to preface it by pointing out that Michael has been forced to move back in with Donna. His failed business ventures and poor mental health have forced him back into this scenario that is NOT GOOD FOR HIM. That scene where Cousin Michelle says to Carm that it's not good for him to be in this environment? Well, it's not good for any of the Berzatto siblings. And throughout the episode, you can tell how exhausted Mikey is by it. By having to fulfill his role as Donna's pseudo-partner.

So let's start with Michael and Donna ganging up on Carmen in the kitchen. When Donna and Mikey do this they are functioning as a parental unit. This is the perfect example of Mikey's parentification at work, of Michael acting as Donna's partner. It's what he's been trained to do to maintain the delicate ecosystem of that house. Donna's emotional state is given top priority. Everyone else's emotions fall to the wayside in light of what she's feeling, otherwise you get fallout like her crashing her car into the house. Mikey talks to Nat about this at the start of the episode:

What do you think she's at right now? A 4? A 5? She's not at a 6.

The siblings literally have a rating system for Donna's moods. They're all trying to avoid escalation above all else. Michael in particular. So in that scene with Carm in the kitchen, Mikey is trying to keep things from escalating. This is something Carmen knows too—hell, it's the first thing Carmen asks Mikey to do in Fishes:

Hey Mikey can you come inside and be you for a little bit, I don't know how to deal with these people.

Carmy needs Michael to come fill his role of buffer between guests and their family. Carmy, notably, gets Donna duty—a role I'm sure Mikey filled before Carmen came along. I say this based on Donna calling Carmen "Michael" when he's trying to coax her to the dinner table at the end of the episode. She's implying talking to her like this is what Michael does. When the people you know irl cite this moment, unfortunately this is the rebuttal: this is Mikey's role. Donna needs his emotional support. Otherwise she'd be more abusive towards Nat and Carm. Michael is doing it for the greater good.

As for Lee, that's another great example of soooo much being implied. Lee, along with Cicero, were best friends with their father, and it is heavily implied that Lee and Donna had a fling or two after their dad fucks off (whether Mr. Berzatto is dead or a deadbeat, who’s to say?). When Lee is helping Donna clean shit off the floor, Mikey grabs a beer from the fridge and asks if they are "doing this again." Basically, Lee and Donna have been romantic before. This means Lee would have been around erratically growing up. And it's clear Michael and Lee have a historic antagonism because of this. Lee's first interaction with Michael in the episode has him threatening to "lay [Michael] out." This screams to me that Lee stepped into the man of the house role, and that Mikey and him had altercations that got physically violent. That's why Mikey says at the dinner table, "I can throw forks cuz this is my father's house." That feels very much like something a kid would say to a man who is trying to replace a missing father. And it's especially heated, because it is Michael who has had to consistently step into the man of the house role for Donna and for his siblings! Michael couldn't leave like Lee when Donna and him broke up. Living with Donna and keeping his siblings ok is daily life for Michael.

So all through the episode, Lee is poking a bear (Mikey Bear to be exact). Lee calls him out about telling the same old stories, embarrasses him in front of everyone by revealing he's borrowed money from Cicero and had to move back in with Donna. Lee has been explicitly disrespecting him. And maybe if Mikey was in a better place, he would have been able to roll with it, but as I mentioned before, Mikey is not in a good place. He's depressed, he's been drinking and taking something (pain pills?) to manage the stress he's under. Him throwing forks is not a lucid reaction. Frankly, if people don't also blame Lee for that outburst, then they really weren't paying attention during the episode.

Finally, onto the Richie portion of your question. Richie’s family is something I would *love* to get more canon info about. All we know is that he's not Italian but Polish, his home life wasn’t great, his dad sucked, and Donna allowed him over so often that he’s practically her fourth child.

Richie and Michael grew up together. They're best friends, practically family. It's why Richie is "cousin." Michael's relationship with Richie is his closest relationship. Everyone says Mikey was their best friend, but Mikey's actual best friend was Richie. Period. And there's some complicated jealousy between Carmen and Richie because of what each is to Michael: Carmy's jealous of Richie and Michael's genuine closeness, and Richie is jealous that Mikey has special regard for Carmen as his actual brother. You see this jealousy in the very first episode of the show during that first walk-in fight: Richie was there for Mikey, buried Mikey and took care of Donna, and yet Mikey left the restaurant to Carmen. Left the money in cans for Carmen, so he could fulfill their dream restaurant together. There's honestly some great fic out there that goes into this jealousy. I'll come back to link it if I can find it.

Bottom line is that Richie was the closest person in Mikey's life. They have the same humor, the same life experiences. They had each other's backs. So when you ask if Richie and Michael's relationship was one-sided, I'm going to answer with a resounding no. They're literally besties. It's just by Fishes, Michael has deteriorated. His depression and drug abuse and failures have shrunk his life. Just compare where they're both at: Michael's moved back in with his mom, is single, and is telling the same old stories from their youth. Richie, on the other hand, might have anxiety (the xanax from Dogs <3), but he's in a stable and loving relationship and has a child on the way. That's why Richie asks Cicero for a job—not to get away from Mikey, but to make more money for his expanding family. And yes, he wants to amount to something more than working at a sandwich shop, but hell, so does Mikey. Neither of them want that for the rest of their lives. It's why Michael tried other business ventures. They fail, so he's stuck at The Beef. But it's a weight around his neck bringing him down. He says as much to Carmen when they're in the pantry:

Yeah but the place is no good, Carmy. It's a fucking nightmare. Like trust me I'm doing you a favor.

He even tries to set it on fire for the insurance money! Only Carmen sees the potential.

As for whether it was always Mikey taking the lead, I do think there's some merit to that. Mikey is talked about as more charming than Richie. You see it in Ceres when the edit compares Mikey telling the Bill Murray story to Richie telling the Bill Murray story to his date. Mikey is loud and funny and can "dial a room." Richie can too, but I think Mikey has more finesse. Still, they rely on each other. They back each other up. Michael would hook people with the stories, and Richie would embellish and inject at the right points or reel Mikey in when needed. They supported each other and worked together. I think any fic you might be reading that's demonizing Michael isn't accurate to his character and is actually falling into a pretty common fic trope: if the focus is Character A, then a fic author will cast Character B as the villain in order to serve whatever they're writing, twisting and embellishing the traits of Character B until they’re barely recognizable. Could Mikey be dismissive and hard to contain? Sure, but I don't think that means he didn't love Richie, or was undemonstrative with his affections. Even when Michael was out of it on drugs, they still had a very close relationship—Richie says so. In fact, everything Richie says about Michael supports this. I see zero support in canon for their relationship being one-sided. I'll say it again, they loved each other.

So this is how I would describe Mikey: loud, funny, obnoxious. He could dial a room. He cared deeply for his family, friends, and employees. He suffered parentification and has some sort of chemical imbalance. In fact, because he was charming and loud and funny, people could ignore his deterioration. Even Richie says, "he was Mikey Bear! I thought he'd come out of it," because he was able to come out of it up to that point. But after decades of not treating the problem, the only solution Michael could see was killing himself. He's a complicated character. He's a tragic character. He's the Laura Palmer of The Bear.

[blueesnow]

(3/6) Jinguji Ren's Private Story [Utapri Live Emotion]

Ch 1: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 6 with Ren)

-Restaurant- Ren: Now then, what should I eat… Lady, how about you? Haruka: O-Oh, I'm okay with anything. Ren: You don't have to hold yourself back. Besides I'm the one who invited you to a meal. Ren: It's kinda tasteless to have a meal alone on my day off, so I'm happy that you come here with me. Haruka: I mean I'm also on my day off too, so hearing you invited me out also made me happy. It's just that, I'm a bit nervous since we're in such an amazing place here. Ren: Don't worry, this is actually one of my acquiantance's place. Here, look at the menu… there's a lot of familiar dishes here, right? Haruka: You're right. There are also pizza and pasta… either of them looks delicious I don't know which one to order… Ren: If you're confused, then shall I gave out my recommendation? Haruka: Really? Then please do! Ren: Well then, it's decided. Owner, mine is as usual while she's- Haruka: (As expected of Jinguji-san, the way he's ordering a menu is also smart. This man definitely suits the atmosphere of this wonderful restaurant) Ren: …And done. The Italian food here is authentic you see and I like how everything they made tastes close to the real thing. Haruka: Wah, I'm looking forward to it…! Jinguji-san is all known when it comes to overseas countries huh. Ren: I often go there when it comes to work or travel after all. I've also known someone who's knowledgeable about Italy too, and I've been there many times since I was a child. Ren: Oh, you see those pictures that they hang onto the wall? I've had a lot of memories of that place.

Ch 2: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 11 with Ren)

-Restaurant- Haruka: That picture, which part of Italy was that from? Ren: Naples. It's a tourist city in the southern Italy with beautiful scenery and many historical buildings. Ren: The people who live there are all jolly and cheerful. And they are also honest and straightforward in their love. Ren: Couples will engage in passionate kisses even during the daytime. Regardless of whether people are watching them or not. Haruka: Even when people are watching them…! Ren: Oops, is that a little too much for you, Lady? But I think that being able to honestly express your love is a good thing. Ren: It's not only just between couples, whether it's friends or family… They don't hesitate to call the person that they love "Amore". Ren: Amore… I love you, Lady. Haruka: J-Jinguji-san…!? Ren: And well, that's how it is. I was doing an Italian greeting just now. Haruka: (That surprised me… To think that's the usual greeting they used… I thought my heart was going to jump out of my chest…) - Haruka: Jinguji-san's recommendation are all delicious! Ren: I'm glad to hear that. Spending time with Lady is fun, and I find myself eating more naturally. Since we're here, I think I'll order some more. Ren: Owner, I'd like another one just like this. And also risotto, prosciutto crudo, dolce, and gelato. Haruka: (Eh, you're going to order that many…!?)

Ch 3: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 21 with Ren)

-Downtown- Haruka: I'm sorry to make you pay for me today. But still, I'm surprised. Jinguji-san, you really do eat a lot, don't you? Ren: Ah, my friends also said the same thing as well. …Is it that surprising? (choices) <You have a nice figure…!> Haruka: Jinguji-san have a very nice figure, so…! Ren: Thanks. I'm happy to hear your compliment, Lady. Ren: Of course I'm being careful before my photoshoot, but generally, I usually eat at my own leisure. <I think it's quite nice> Haruka: I think it's quite nice that you eat a lot. The owner is happy as well. Ren: Thanks. Lady really pays a lot of attention to the people around her, doesn't she? Ren: I'm just eating freely, but if Lady says so, then maybe it could be one of my strong points. (back to story) Ren: I like delicious food, so maybe that's why I ended up eating a lot of it. Haruka: Fufu, just watching you eat bring a smile to my face. Ren: …I feel like I could eat as much as I want, as long as I can see those expression on your face. Ren: Can I invite you to go out for a meal again? I know a few of other good restaurants. Ren: Ah but, it doesn't have to be just eating out, going somewhere for fun would be nice too. For the destination…how about Italy? Haruka: Italy!? T-That's… Ren: Haha, I guess I was a bit too hasty. Let's start with a nearby place first, I'll invite you again on our next holidays. Haruka: Thank you! I'll be looking forward to it. Ren: When there's a promise in the future, it makes your heart skip a beat, isn't it. It also makes me more motivated to do my work. Ren: Thank you for giving me strength, Lady. Let's do our best again starting tomorrow.

Ch 4: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 31 with Ren)

Ch 5: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 41 with Ren)

Ch 6: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 51 with Ren)

[buckysmith]

Ramadan Special

NON BINARY READER

First disclaimer, I'm NOT a Muslim, so I use google and a lot of websites to write that headcanon, so I DEEPLY APOLOGIZE for ANY mistakes, please let me know if I did something wrong/incorrect and I'll correct it as fast as I can!

Why do I do an Ramadan special  when I'm not an Muslim? 'Cause it's only fair for my  dear friends from another religion to have the same treatment as my own religion, so cause I did an Christmas special, I'll do an Ramadan special as well.

So as a Christian I wish all my Muslim friends, a happy Ramadan, may all your duas come true this Ramadan!

Ramadan Mubarak! <3

Enjoy it D. and thank you so much for helping me with the intel <3

Oh and dear, if you're reading this, I was just as embarrassed as gromsko, much love  😂

Ghost:

- he knows that for you it is an incredibly important period, so it hurts him even more to leave you alone during this time because of his job

- if he is not in the country due to his job and has the time, he will call you just before iftar to either wish you a good evening or to be there via FaceTime

- if he is at home, he helps you during the day to prepare food for the evening so that you can have a nice time together with friends and family in the evening

- if you are not feeling well, it is not a problem for him to take over your household chores, because he has the highest respect for what you do for your faith and seeing you happy is the most important for him

- during ramadan he also keeps some distance physically so as not to tempt you

- he would even sleep in the guest room if you want it

- it is important for him not to do anything wrong and therefore he learns through you, other muslims and many books what he has to follow and what he is allowed to do and what not, which what  he can help you and so much more

- expect him to sit next to you, almost asleep just to eat suhoor at 3 AM with you

- he doesn’t give a something when you tell him that he can go to sleep early, he stays awake for you no matter what, no matter how tired he is

Soap

- as a Roman Catholic, he is familiar with fasting, however, it was a surprise to him how big the difference are

- he was a bit confused at the beginning, not knowing exactly what he could and could not do.

- when he found out that you were going to fast for a month and therefore abstain from water and food for a month, he was already panic-stricken that you would die because of the dehydration.

- however the fear subsided after you explained it to him and he felt really stupid

- if he is not at home during ramadan because of his job, he will make sure you are near your family/friends or that you can go to his family to break the fast

- he is a really good cook and his dishes are always very good, he doesn't like spicy food but he will cook anything for you, you just have to tell him what you want.

- if you are not feeling well during Ramadan, he will make sure that he can at least make your life more comfortable

- but expect him to avoid you physically like the plague itself

- he loves you too much and has too little self control to keep the relationship between you "normal" so he tries to have as little physical contact as possible, after all he doesn't want you to commit a sin or anything like that

- while you are fasting, he is also fasting while he is at home, he thinks it is unfair that only you are fasting and so he goes along with it

- but if he goes on a mission he apologizes a thousand times for not fasting as well.

Alejandro

- he is quite awkward at the beginning concerning the topic.

- México isn't a country with  many muslims and therefore he simply lacks the knowledge.

- however, it is important to him that you know that he supports you in every aspect of your life.

- accordingly he learns a lot about your religion to not look completely stupid

- but he was really awkward the first time

- he did not know what he is allowed to do and what not

- in his base there was always music playing, when he found out that you were not allowed to listen to music among other things, he made sure that as soon as you entered the base there was no music to be heard anywhere

- when he found out that you were in fact allowed to listen to music, he felt so stupid and you teased him about it endlessly

- he even arranged for you to have your own little room on the base, which looked towards Mecca, where you could pray in peace, if you ever spent a longer time on the base

- he also tried not to drink or eat in front of you, nor to say any swear words in that time

- he would also gladly do the cooking for you if it was too much for you and you needed time to rest or pray.

- he avoided physical touch with you like the plague, cause he knew himself and he wanted everything but to commit a sin

Rudy

- he is a little awkward at the beginning, in México there are not many Muslims he could have learned from, so it is new territory for him to learn more about you, your culture and religion.

- The first time he experienced Ramadan with you, he was confused why you didn't have breakfast with him in the morning as usual

- he then offered you something to drink, which you also declined

- and when you told him that you were not allowed to eat or drink anything for a month, he died inside.

- but he didn't make a face cause he didn't want  to hurt you and just nodded with a smile.

- when he went to work that day, the first person he talked to was Alejandro.

- he talked to his best friend about how unhealthy it was to not eat for a month, but he was way more worried about you not drinking anything

- three days without water was bad, but a month?! How did you survive that before?! He was sure that you must be a super  human to go a month without water.

- he came home that evening at the time you broke your fast, and was shocked to see so much delicious food

- that confused him, he thought you were not allowed to eat and drink anything?

- after you explained it to him he understood and at the same time was so incredibly relieved and ashamed

- he also keeps his distance during Ramadan and the most you might get is a kiss on the cheek if you don't allow him to give you more attention

- but as soon as Ramadan is over he makes up for all the attention he missed during that month.

Price:

- he has traveled a lot in his life, got to know many people and many religions and is accordingly enlightened

- especially because his "adopted daughter" Farah is muslim herself

- he tries to be with you during this time, but his job doesn't allow that most of the time, so he at least tries to call you or write you an sms

- if he can't make it at all, he records a video and sends it to you so that he can be there too

- but if he is at home, he does it for you out of solidarity, because he was once not allowed to eat solid food for two weeks and was so mad at everyone who ate in front of him

- he even gives up smoking, which is incredibly difficult for him, but nothing is too hard for him when it's for you

- he is also an incredibly good cook, so you are not alone in preparing food for your whole family and believe me, even your family loves his food

- the hardest thing for him though was to avoid physical contact, because his mind quickly darts to something else and he knew yours was too, so he kept his distance.... Unless you allowed him that certain something after sunset.

Laswell:

- She has several friends who are Muslims, so it's not new territory

- she has already celebrated iftar with all of them, helped her friends to cook and is really good at it

- when you cooked together for the first time during Ramadan, you always let her taste the food to know if there was anything missing in the spices

- for that you had cooked all the dishes you would cook during Ramadan before it so she knew what they should taste like

- she also tried to avoid eating or drinking in front of you and also stopped smoking in front of you

- for her the worst thing was not to have as much physical contact with you as before, but she knew how fast your mind was elsewhere and she did not want you to break your fast because of her

Valeria

- she did not care much for religion, neither for her own nor for any of the others

- for her religion was only the strongest means to oppress people, because it threatened consequences after death and put pressure on people during their lifetime

- she saw it as the perfect means to control people the way you wanted to

- however, she knew that you were faithful to your religion and that it was important to you, which she did not understand, but she accepted it for you

- she also made sure that you had a quiet place in her villa where you could pray in peace

- the principle of fasting was not really understandable to her but it did not make much difference to her since you usually ate something after sunset anyway

- although she is not a fan of religion, she still tries to be there for you and support you

- what really annoys her is that she has to stay physically at a distance

König

- a few of his old colleagues were Muslims, which is why he partly noticed it, but other religions did not interest him very much

- his religion was more than enough for him, he didn't need to know anything about others, after all his was already too much for him!

- However, this changes when you told him about your religion, explained it to him and why you are fasting and all the other things.

- he listens to you attentively and tries to remember as much of it as possible

- he has the highest respect for you that you manage not to drink or eat anything during the day for a month, he had tried it for five days

- the food had been an easy one, he had had many missions where he had no food for a long time, but drinking had been the problem for him

- he could not do without water during the day

- the worst thing for him was that when he was at home he couldn't have that much physical contact with you anymore

- but after Ramadan he will make up for all the physical contact he missed, so be prepared.

Makarov

- for him religion is only a means to legally oppress people to make them compliant without getting violent

- he likes the principle of religion itself, because in his opinion it makes people stick to something for centuries

- For him, it's the same thing he did to people

- when you told him that you were going to fast, he was confused and didn't really understand

- you had to explain it to him and you could see in his face that he was not the biggest fan of it

- according to him it was just impossible to know if you had time to eat at night, after all you lived with him

- however, when he saw that it hurt you the way he treated your religion, he made sure that you could fully concentrate on your religion during this time

- he tries to support you in his own way, which may not always be correct but he tries his best

Gromsko

- he himself had a few colleagues who were Muslims and with whom he celebrated iftar, but only when you lived with him did he really realize what it actually meant

- he made you a Ramadan calendar like you made him an Advent calendar at Christmas

- he filled it with things he knew you would like, different sweets and a lot of other stuff

- he also helped you with cooking or did all the housework when you were not feeling well

- he also helped you cook and prepare for breaking the fast

- he found out of his own that you were not allowed to listen to music, he made sure that there wasn’t music playing anywhere

- that confused you, cause he was always listing to some Taylor swift song and when you asked him about it he told you confused himself that you weren’t allowed to listen to music, which made you giggle

- you told him that you were allowed to listen to it, but that you had to avoid it a bit, to focus more on praying and your religion

- he was SOO embarrassed that he had misunderstood it

- he helped and supported you wherever he could

[swaps55]

this might be random, but i NEED to know, what's the risotto recipe you have in mind? I love cooking and, not to be cringe, but I have made a few of the dishes you've mentioned in Opus if they catch my eye or I have enjoyed making them before and fancy giving them a whirl again. But I don't remember you ever quite specifying the risotto and I was wondering if, well, there was a specific recipe or if it was just risotto. I was planning to just wing it but, well, food is a very conscientious theme throughout Opus and I knew there was a chance you might have an actual recipe in mind!

First, that is not cringe, that is amazing, and I am now dying to know what you have made.

Second, FUNNY STORY.

I do a lot of due diligence when I write. Food is a theme that runs throughout this series, and honest to god I look things up before I slap them on the page. Kaidan has a much more multicultural background than I do, and I didn't want to be That Asshole who assumes my narrow culinary experiences are universal. So when I mention a dish, it's safe to say I put some thought into it. I even have the actual drink recipes for the 'Yang Gang's favorite cocktails, thanks to @pip-n-flinx.

There is one notable exception to this.

It's the risotto.

I'm gonna be honest. When I made risotto the coveted Alenko dish, it went something like this:

Me: Ok, I need a funny reason for Shepard to be willing to go pose as Kaidan's partner with his parents. Also Me: How about a legendary home cooked meal. Me: Perfect. What's the Legendary Home Cooked Meal at Casa Alenko? First thing that comes to mind. Also Me: Risotto. Me: Great. Wait, what is risotto? Also Me: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Me: Doesn't matter, we're rolling with it.

I'm not even kidding. When I made Lora Alenko's Risotto the most mouth watering meal in the galaxy I didn't actually know what risotto was. I thought it was some kind of pasta. See why I research?

You have to understand, this all started with Sonata, and Sonata was supposed to be an AU one shot that was maybe 7k words TOPS. It wasn't supposed to be part of Opus. It wasn't supposed to dictate the tone and establish everything about how Opus ultimately unfolds. And because I wasn't writing it with that in mind - it was just this silly, supremely self-indulgent diversion to distract me from the stupid thing I was stuck on in Cantata - I, uh. I just winged it.

(I have since looked it up, since had it, and DO actually know what it is, please stop laughing.)

So I have no idea what the recipe is. I feel like it's one of those things that can't have a recipe, because the reality will never be as good as Kaidan's boasting.

But also consider this alternative: Sam has the worst tastebuds in the galaxy. What If Lora Alenko's "risotto" was just some elaborate home made cheesy rice that was kid!Kaidan's favorite meal, so he has some big time nostalgia glasses on about it, Sam is insane over it because he's a basic bitch, and there has not been a marine on the 'Yang who doesn't love it because marines' idea of a good snack is a box of crayons.

Just saying. XD

(That said, if you wind up with a heavenly risotto recipe you recommend, I'm uh, open to suggestions....;)

[xjulixred45x]

Ling Yao x Abused Reader

This is technically the last part of a series that my sister had asked me for at the beginning of my account but that I forgot over time and I apologize for that (I may write on my own about this fandoms in the future I have several ideas but now I'm going with this).

Genre: Headcanons

Reader: female

Warnings: Mentions of child marriage, implications of physical and mental abuse, bad parents, egregious and alarming age difference, Hurt-Comfort, Fluff, Happy Ending.

To be fair, these two already knew each other in Xing.

(reader) is the only daughter of the war secretary of one of the many clans that were under the emperor's orders, the Han Clan.

But despite this, her father was not very interested in teaching her his work or making her stand out in general, he wanted her to become a "proper society lady" so he forbade her to come into contact with activities that could distract her from that task.

Her mother teach her, giving exhaustive lessons in etiquette, posture, manners, preparing tea and giving it a try (even if you didn't like it, since according to her "that would please your future husband"), teaching cooking, throwing dishes bad things in the trash or your head, etc.

Your parents prohibited or banned any type of material or activity that incited rebellion or that seemed "inappropriate for a girl." Learn to fight? "Boys don't like girls to have muscles" Politics? "Keep quiet you look prettier" Any type of physical activity that was not related to what is traditionally feminine? "It's not attractive to be running around like a beast."

And sometimes it was just too boring.

So you went out to see REALLY interesting things, like fights!

That's how you initially met Ling.

You both knew each other superficially through your parents, but when you started showing up to watch the Yao Clan's training, he became curious.

From time to time Ling would go straight to talk to you, thinking that maybe you wanted to join the fighting practices, but you couldn't really risk getting caught, so you would just talk or watch the other clan members train.

You went to Ling when you needed a break from the "lady" life your parents imposed on you. It was very liberating.

Ling, even at a young age, understood that kind of pressure quite well, not only having to fit into the mold but also having to constantly compete with his brothers and sisters.

Thanks to this they made friends quite quickly. You run away a lot more often just to be able to play with him. He was the only boy your age you REALLY got along with after all.

Your parents, even if they were against it, couldn't do much once you stepped on Yao land or found out WHO you were playing with, so it was AMAZING for you to finally be a girl.

Ling was more about acting before thinking, while trying to keep a cooler head, which made for a fun dynamic to watch.

At some point you even gave in and Ling taught you some basic fighting moves! Nothing great but at least it was a lot more fun than your dance classes.

Ling would even secretly pass you books about politics or books that your parents had forbidden you to read (things that you shared very lightly) and you would finish them in DAYS (but not without first giving Ling a kiss on the cheek as compensation, for his delight).

I think it's a little obvious that Ling may or may not have had a case of a childhood/youth crush on (reader) while they were growing up, but after a certain...situation, he didn't have the chance to really realize it.

Because one day (reader) simply disappeared.

She stopped going to training, she didn't go to the places where one normally found her to play, she stopped showing up.

What Ling didn't know was that (Reader)'s family had come up with an idea to end this rebellious phase and benefit once and for all now that she was finally of age.

Arrange a marriage, with the son of the emperor of the Han Clan...he was an adult and you were just a teenager.

Ling only found out out of mere courtesy of the clan.

And for a couple of months it was a pain trying to contact you. Not because he didn't want to! But because your family (and new "husband") made it very difficult.

The clans themselves had a complicated relationship with each other, after the emperor get sick it was even worse. Even if he wanted to, he couldn't risk generating even more conflict.

Although he had a chance to see her before he had to travel to Amestris, at a "family meeting" where the Han clan was.

Where would it be (reader)

....part of him is grateful he went and part of him wishes he hadn't.

Because when Ling came and looked for (reader) and found her, it was like seeing a ghost.

(reader) had become somewhat taller in recent months, she was well dressed and with several capes of makeup on her face, with a vacant and empty look, quite distant from the happy and unrestrained version.

She also didn't talk much before Ling arrived. Or even when he arrived, but at least her expression changed, that made Ling feel a little better.

Luckily her husband was busy enough getting into discussions about the country's military with his other brothers that he didn't notice Ling quite close to his "wife."

Despite everything, Ling was happy to see her being just as friendly, but quite tired, they took the opportunity to catch up.

(Reader)'s husband...could be worse. According to her. It wasn't easy, it's complicated, he got angry very easily and his friends are... shameless. but (reader) had been able to survive the situation well thanks to certain charms.

Even if (reader) is trying VERY hard to maintain control, Ling can see the anguish in all of this. They comfort each other in the situation.

The time before Ling goes to seek immortality, he spends it making small secret visits to the Han house or rather, visiting (Reader).

Try to make them have good memories before you don't see each other for a while :')

Imagine Ling drops the "I used to have a GIANT crush on you when we were kids" bomb☠️

During much of her trip in Amestris Ling thinks about (reader), sometimes she even buys things that she thinks she might like there (accessories, a book, things like that).

I can even see Greed making fun of him for that when it takes over his body☠️

When he eventually returns to Xing, he is mentally preparing to see (female reader). By coming up with a plan, you may not be able to help (reader) directly, but you can definitely do it externally.

(Reader) is DEFINITELY very surprised when Ling arrives not only completely changed, without Wu, and with his sister from the Chang Clan, but also comes with IMMORTALITY ITSELF...he achieved it..

All the commotion of Ling's arrival and her triumph over her other brothers means that (reader)'s husband does not notice when she sneaks away, wanting to have a talk with Ling.

They don't manage to say much to each other, precisely because of the rush and urgency of discussing Ling's appointment, but at least she manages to give him a big welcoming hug, telling him that she misses him and that she's glad he's okay.

Ling freezes for a solid second before returning the hug tightly and pulling away. Temporarily.

(female reader) is also present when he is declared the new emperor some time later.

Knowing Ling, he, May and Lan Fan will probably look for incriminating evidence of adultery on the part of (reader)'s husband so she can divorce him without problems. They leave the evidence "anonymously" but (reader) can recognize Ling/Lan Fan's writing patterns very well.

Ling and (Reader) keep seeing each other at family events, which is hilariously awkward for almost everyone but them, since no one can REALLY say anything to Ling now that he's the emperor, not even (Reader)'s husband, who He only stands on the sidelines while his wife and half-brother catch up on the adventure he had in Amestris.

When (Reader) decides to divorce of her own free will, guess who makes it official? ;)

If we look at their current relationship, it's better than either of them would expect!

Ling was pretty depressed after Amestris, Wu and Greed, but at least (Reader) never fails to make him smile or laugh, which helps his mental health a lot.

You can even bring out your old habits, like embarrassing/angrying (reader) a little and see her expressions, it doesn't matter if she gets her butt kicked. It was worth it!

(reader) must be the most sheltered woman in all of Xing, and no wonder, although at least she always has someone to talk to ☠️

When (reader) goes outside with Ling they have to have limited physical contact for etiquette issues, but Ling always holds her hand or hooks her arm around hers to keep her close :3

Both at some point can talk more openly about their traumas and cope with them with each other's help lots of cuddles during bedtime on those types of days.

At this point they would be very lucky if (Reader)'s parents are even still in Xing after what they did to their daughter and Ling becoming emperor 😅

This man is cuddly as fuck! Sure, you have to reserve the PDA in front of the other clans for appearance and etiquette issues, but once you're alone or with privacy? Nothing stops him. Especially with hugs.

I think Ling would be very interested in his partner learning basic defense, especially with Lan Fan being highly trustworthy. Even if (reader) is contrastingly protected, she knows that she is never too much.

In short, very sweet love that rots your teeth❤️

Shares, reblogs and comments are very welcome!

[k0nanharv3y]

Since I didn't find a promising list of Fanfics with Mikey Centric, I'M MAKING MY OWN

You can leave suggestions, THEY DON'T HAVE TO BE FROM 2012 OR MIKEY, JUST THAT HE IS MY FAVORITE CHARACTER AND THE BOYS FROM 2012 WERE VERY FUCKED, but I am also open to reading from all the series and all the characters. (If you recommend LFLS I'm going to throw you out the window)

This will be constantly updated, but it's like... 3 in the morning here and I have school tomorrow

HEY SUNSHINE The darkness is safe but darkness is still darkness. Everyone needs sunshine to make the darkness feel less bleak.

Underground there was no sunshine.

Mikey decided that he would be that light no matter what it did to him

-My favorite story of all time, if you like Badass Mikey this is your story

REMEMBER YOUR MISSION 8 times Mikey drifted with someone...

...and one time he didn't need to.

-The 2012! TMNT x Pacific Rim AU It's good, it's worth it a thousand times, but it's more to pass the time and be calm from so much angst

Edit - REMEMBER WHAT I TOLD YOU ABOUT ANGST? WELL, I LIED TO YOU *starts crying on the floor*

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT LOVE MEANS (and it's killing me) "Finally, they could try and regain their lost childhood, to be a family again.

Except…

His family didn’t feel like family anymore.

-Do I... do I have to explain this? It's... I cried a thousand times when I read it, it's worth a thousand times the moon but... I'M STILL CRYING MY GOD

SPRAY PAINT, VIOLENCE AND SUPERHEROES Miles and Mikey meet up and decide to fight crime together. Absolute chaos ensues.

Turns out, bad guys don't like turtles and spiders together very much.

-I NEED TO SAY THAT I AM A SHELLSHOCKED FAN, I LOVE THEM, THEY ARE MY BABIES

FIVE MINUTES 'TIL SELF DESTRUCT Even the mightiest of ninja cannot always avoid illness. In Mikey's case, it's the one thing he's never quite been able to dodge. But when a simple cold leaves the family's youngest without a voice, misadventures quickly turn into discoveries as the family bands together. Let the sick days begin

-It's fun, it's VERY good to pass the time, I really liked the narrative and how the brothers interacted

BABY BROTHER When it comes to Mikey

Leo indulges, Raph protects and Donnie teaches

-THEY MAKE ME GO QKAJQIHDJQJANQNDKQLA I LOVE THEM THEY DESERVE THE FUCKING WORLD

TWO HALVES OF A WHOLE HEART Whenever Mikey isn't feeling to great, he'll seek out his older brother.

-I CAN'T I LOVE THEM

I CAN'T HANDLE REJECTION Michelangelo breaks the TV.

-It couldn't all be so fluff, it takes a little bit of a lot of depression to live

WHERE DO WE BEGIN? (the rubble or our sins) Mikey is hit by cuddle pollen, and he and his brothers try to deal with it. (And maybe heal some family wounds along the way.)

-You don't know it's sad until the sad thing comes

ONE MORE NIGHT (please, just for tonight) The night before his big trip, Mikey's brothers stood him up. He pretends he's not hurt about this

-You know you should cry, you didn't because you're a monster.

BE LIKE YOUR BROTHER (and never like yourself) Three times Mikey tried to be like his big brothers.

And one time they told him he didn't have to

-Ah, I could read this a thousand and one times.

WHAT NICOTINE DOES Mikey looks for a way to sleep again without nightmares. He's not doing his best

-Ah, yes, this is me promoting my own fanfic

SONG OF A SUNNY DAY (fading into dusk) The lair has been filled with nothing but the sounds of a heart monitor and quiet. It's too quiet for Mikey, so he goes on a solo run of the city. He finds a violin case on the ground and decides to take it home

-I have love for this story. It was one of the first ones I read and the reason I returned to my love of the violin. Don't look for much angst... they serve it as a main dish

SO HERE'S TO THE HEARTACHE The sequel to "You don't know what love means (and it's killing me)"

-I JUST *CRY INTENSELY*

A CALCULATED PLAN Mourning the loss of splinter, the four turtles struggle to maintain a positive relationship with each other. But when Leo finds a letter saying that Donatello will be the new leader, the divide between the brothers becomes larger.

-HAHAHAHHAHA you are going to suffer so bad

SWAY On an undercover mission to stop a villain’s scheme, one named King Pen who was hosting a party Mikey meets Miles and they have a dance. Let’s sway!

-WOAHHHH I WANT A BOYFRIEND SO HARD *cries*

EMPATHY AMPLIFIED Mikey’s always been one to shoulder his brother’s pain. What happens when the family therapist begins to experience mystic empathy? New powers plus old habits die hard.

-I just... FUCK OFF MAN I READ IT DURING THE NIGHT 'CUZ I HAD A HYPERFIXATION U NEED TO READ THIS

THE SHINOBI'S GARDEN

-Compilation of one-shots of series that I love and will leave here below

DEVIL TOOK YOUR HAND Michelangelo gets ambushed; the Shredder gets another chance to test his mind control serum (I... can't say it)

ALL THE SMALL THINGS An experiment gone wrong de-aged Donnie back into a toddler. Good thing Mikey's great with kids. (ABUBUBUBUAAAHHH I LOVE THEM SM)

RECORD-BREAKING HEAT Losing power overnight may also mean losing your pet cat, if she's made of ice cream (Yeah,... *cry*)

IF WISHES WERE FISHES Raph, Leo and Donnie are quadruplets whose baby brother died the day they were born. When Raphael brings home a new friend with wide blue eyes, a face full of freckles, and a brown belt in karate, the whole family gets a taste of what it might have been like had Michelangelo survived (I just love this story :])

WALK WITH OPEN HANDS Mikey’s head snaps up like a rubber band, so fast it hurts his neck. His father is standing in the doorway, whole and unharmed and strong. He tilts his head, taking in the probably dumb way Mikey is just standing there staring up at him (I'm pretty sure I still don't understand the ending. BUT FUCK, IT'S A WORK OF DAMN ART)

TRAVELING SO FAR TO GET THERE The sound of the apocalypse is a pop number from 1968 by The Foundations. And that’s only because Raphael’s little brother didn’t have the common courtesy to get a decent punk-rock song stuck in his head on the day they fell into this hellscape in the first place. He’s just saying, The Clash or The Offspring or even Fall Out Boy would make more sense, like, thematically. Instead he’s stuck listening to—. “WHY DO YOU BUILD ME UP! BUTTERCUP, BABY, JUST TO LET ME DOWN!". “Mikey,” he yells across the street, “I swear to GOD!” (Long description, and yes, The Foundations became my favorite artists for a week just because of this story)

PROBLEM CHILD Michelangelo has three overprotective big brothers, some questionable friends, a burgeoning need to make himself useful, and a lot of growing up to do. (MY GOSH YOU'RE GONNA LOVE THIS ONE)

I'VE BEEN AFRAID OF CHANGING It’s not fair. Donnie’s so smart. He’s tired and overworked and unhappy, but he’s smart. How can he get this one thing so wrong? How can he not know Mikey as well as he used to, like all of those years of being each other’s best friends and co-conspirators and secret-keepers from where they were relegated to the “B Team” aren’t as intrinsic and important and fundamental to him as they are to Mikey? How can he look at Mikey, right in the face, and not understand him at all?. Something breaks. (I hate myself for thinking the deleted scenes from 2007 were trash)

-And like these stories, she has thousands more, only these are my favorites and they have Mikey in them, but yes, it has Leo and Usagi, Raph and Casey, Donnie being... Donnie i guess

[shinnyscats]

¡! Swiss x Gn!Reader

"Your soft cheeks."☁️

A/n: Heyya! I'm back with Swiss :3 (Gosh, lately I'm getting a lot of Swiss videos on my fyp… I'm getting worried…) Anyways! Here is Swiss playing with reader's cheeks! Hope you like it! Sorry if it's short (╥﹏╥)

TW: None! Just fluff and the reader's gender is not specified! ^^ (Again, I'm not very good at putting tw, so if something is missing please tell me!)

Versión español aquí!

★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★

You finally finished rehearsing the song that was going to come out soon. You played it quite well, but you wanted to polish some details.

You rise from the chair and stretch with a deep inhalation. The bones of your back and arms crack a little as you stretched back and to the sides. Once you were done, you exhale slowly and relax your body, letting yourself fall slightly forward. It wasn't that late, a look at the clock informed that it was 7:47 pm. Your body immediately reminds you of how hungry you are and think of something to eat while putting away your instrument…

The path to the kitchen was a bit long from where you were, but thinking about other things made the path shorter. Upon entering the well-lit kitchen, you notice how another ghoul was already inside.

He seemed not to have heard you come in as he kept moving his hips slightly to the rhythm of a song that was in the background. You can hear how the ghoul sang, and you immediately recognize the voice by the melodious vowels he had, despite the fact that it was singing at a low volume.

"Hey Swiss." You speak as you approach, getting a look from the ghoul along with a grin. "Hey! Are you done rehearsing?" You nod in response as you cross your arms and watch Swiss lean towards the counter. "Yeah… I'm starving."

You say while walking towards the fridge, being stopped by the Ghoul in front of you. "I made sandwiches. Do you want one?" You turn to see the sandwiches on the counter and nod excitedly. "Yes, please!" He hands you one of the sandwiches, and you quickly take a bite. You can feel in your mouth the flavors of the ingredients that you most liked to eat in this dish.

"I was going to go see you when I was done, that's why I made them with your favourite ingredients." The multi-ghoul, who was also eating, said with a smile. You nod and let out a little noise as a way of saying thanks as you took another bite.

You stare at the ground while you eat, remaining completely stoic while chewing. Sure, until you feel a finger touch your cheek, making you look at Swiss a little confused. "Swiss?"

"Nothing, it's just that you look like a squirrel-"

"What-?" You couldn't finish speaking because Swiss had grabbed your cheek and was squeezing it lightly while laughing. "It's pretty soft!" You simply went back to nibbling your sandwich as you felt now how both of Swiss's hands were on your cheeks, playing with them and squeezing them. A characteristic smile takes over the face of the ghoul in front of you. You felt a bit of embarrassment show on your cheeks, causing them to turn red, but you didn't care too much…

After a while of Swiss praising and playing with your soft cheeks, you returned to the rehearsal room, watching how Sodo and Phantom were already there. Before you could do anything, they both look at you, avoiding laughing.

"What is it?" You asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh- Nothing, nothing.." They both respond while looking at each other and laughing to themselves, wondering when you'd notice how red your cheeks were.

★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★