#I do my own laundry I have a lady who cleans for me so literally yeah that's the job | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

thisgirlnamedblusy · 8 months ago

Note

Your works are absolutely marvelous, It’s so nice to see so much Donna content.

Would you enjoy writing of how donna and her maid slowly fall for each other over time, maybe even one of them finally confessing? Any direction you want to take it I know it would be lovely.

Love your writings !! :)

Yess!!! Here it is!! Thank you for your words!!! I hope you like it and sorry about the language mistakes!!!! :))))

I'm not going to break your heart

Pairing: Donna Beneviento x Fem! Maid! Reader

Warnings: angst, mental health issues, Donna being Donna, fluff,

Word count: 5,408

Summary: You are Donna's maid. She's a complicated woman, but... Maybe with time you can be able to know her...

N/A: Sorry about the language mistakes!!! Oh, this is too long... Again, I'm sorry... Requests are open!!!! I love you all!!! :)))

The village was a horrible, dark place. Even though you were born there, you never felt comfortable. The poverty, the humble lifestyle that was lived there didn’t matter. No, that wasn't the problem. The problem had its own name: Mother Miranda.

The priestess ruled the place. You, the villagers, were a simple flock that followed her footsteps. You never agreed with it, but you knew your life depended on it, literally.

“Did you want to see me, Mother Miranda?” You asked respectfully, with your hands trembling from having that woman so close to you.

“Yes...” She sighed, barely looking at your face. “(Y/N), right?”

“Yes, Mother Miranda,” you answered with your head bowed, fixing your gaze as far away from hers as possible.

“How old are you?” Miranda asked. Of course, a person like her could ask those kinds of questions without fear of seeming impolite. She also wasn’t a woman who liked to waste time.

“25, Mother Miranda,” you said with a voice broken by fear.

“Mm,” she murmured, barely paying attention to you. You certainly preferred it that way. “You're not married, are you?”

As strange as the question seemed to you, you knew that answering was the only way to get out of that church as soon as possible.

“No, Mother Miranda, I’m not married.”

The priestess raised her head. That golden mask hid almost her entire face, but her icy eyes were still able to pierce your insides.

“Why? Can't find the right man?” She asked with a sigh, walking in circles around you, as if she were one of the hundreds of crows that flew over the village constantly.

“No, it's not that, Mother Miranda... I...” You stopped just before the words left your mouth. No, she didn't have to know the real reason for your lack of interest in men. It's true that the sexual preferences of the villagers were of no interest to her, but who knows.

“I don't mean to judge you. I'm just making sure you're available. I have to ask you for a favor.

You had to be the maid of one of the lords. That's what she wanted from you.

You had never considered serving any of them. You had heard horrible things about the castle maids. But it's not like you could refuse.

Fortunately, the castle was not your destination. Apparently Miranda wanted you to serve the youngest lord, the solitary and almost unknown doll maker, Donna Beneviento.

Although at first the woman in black refused, all you had to do was to say that it was Mother Miranda's thing and then she reluctantly accepted your services. You had heard horrible things about that woman: that she was crazy, that she could make you kill yourself, that she made you experience true fear... None of that happened, unless your greatest fear is the feeling of emptiness and loneliness.

“Good morning, my lady, have you rested well?” You asked politely like every morning and, like every morning, a slight nod from the lady in black was the only response.

Not even the mystery that black veil hid made the days go by faster. Clean, cook, do the laundry. Your tasks were boring and empty, at least if the Angie doll didn't feel like bothering you.

And again, silence. A dead silence that weighed on your shoulders. You weren't exactly a talkative girl, or one who enjoyed contact with other people, but you would have appreciated some communication from the lady in black.

“Be careful, my lady, it’s still very hot,” you said hastily, making a clumsy gesture to take the coffee cup from her hands.

She backed away like she always did when you got a little closer.

“Donna likes her coffee warm, idiot, not hot as hell,” Angie protested, with a cocky pose.

You rolled your eyes without her seeing you. She was a terribly impertinent doll.

“I'm so sorry, my lady,” you apologized, grabbing the cup carefully. “I'm going to fix it right away.”

“It doesn't matter,” a soft, hoarse voice came from the veil. It was the first time she spoke to you in her own voice.

In those first two months not a single word had come out of her mouth. You supposed that was a good thing, but you were still afraid. Your friends warned you several times to be very careful with that woman.

“I... Fine, my lady," you said, lowering your head and moving away from the lady, who seemed to be studying your gestures.

“You useless maid,” Angie whispered with a childish laugh.

“I’ve already said I'm sorry,” you said, unable to suppress a growl that passed through your throat.

“Enough, Angie. Leave her alone,” Lady Beneviento spoke again to your surprise. The doll obeyed, huffing and muttering what you thought were insults directed at you, of course.

“You know what? I'm going to cool the cup, so it won't be so hot,” you said, determined to please that stupid porcelain doll. Donna didn't scare you that much, but Angie… Angie was really scary.

The nervousness of hearing her speak for the first time, and the fact that the coffee was too hot, caused the cup to fall to the floor with a clumsy movement, breaking into a thousand pieces.

“Oh, my God... I'm sorry, I'm so sorry,” you said, hurriedly bending down to pick up the pieces of porcelain.

The lady in black stood up, looking down at you, probably also scared by the sound of the cup breaking.

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry,” you repeated nervously, avoiding looking at that black dress. “I'm so clumsy... Forgive me, I beg you.”

You expected some angry shouts, even the teasing of the Angie doll. But none of that happened. Instead, you thought you heard a soft laugh coming from the black veil.

“You’re begging me?” She asked curiously. “It's just a cup.”

“Yeah, but, but I...” You stammered, not being able to stop shaking, something that apparently caught Lady Beneviento's attention.

“You're afraid of me,” she whispered, grabbing one of your wrists roughly.

“What? I don't...” You said, surprised by those words.

“It wasn’t a question. You're afraid of me, you're shaking,” Donna said with a more serious tone while you stood up with the pieces in your hand. “Do you think I'm going to hurt you?”

You didn't really understand the reason for those strange questions. Unfortunately, you couldn't say she wasn't right. You knew who she was, the things she was capable of. In the two months you had been in that house, you had never made a mistake, until that day. You didn't know what the consequences were going to be.

“I... I'm going, I'm going to throw this away and get something to clean the floor...” you said, cowardly fleeing from that conversation, from the first real conversation with that woman.

“No, stay,” the lady ordered, with a demanding tone.

“My, my lady, I...” you murmured.

“What have you heard about me?” She asked, sitting down in the chair again without taking her eyes off yours.

“About you? I don't... I don't understand...” You said, looking for a hole in the floor to disappear instantly.

“You are my maid, (Y/N). I want you to answer my questions,” the doll maker said, hardening her tone even more, squeezing her hand tightly, as if she were losing her patience.

“My lady, I...” you said in a low voice, unable to understand the situation you found yourself in.

“Answer, stupid, stupid,” Angie demanded, comically leaning over the table.

“Well I...” you said, avoiding looking at her, thinking that maybe running away was a good idea. “They say… They say that you are capable of making people feel real fear, that you can… That you can do horrible things to them.

Donna nodded slowly, listening carefully to her words.

“So do you think I’m going to do horrible things to you just for breaking a coffee cup?” She asked again, seemingly calm, although her clenching hand said otherwise.

“I don't know," you admitted crestfallen, noticing how your nervousness made you stab one of the pieces of porcelain in your hand.

“You don't know,” Donna sighed, with a slightly ironic tone.

You just shook your head.

She was quiet for a moment, looking at you, barely moving. The strength of her hand decreased until her knuckles returned to their original color.

“Pick up this mess and get back to your tasks. I'm not hungry,” she ordered you angrily, getting up from the chair and disappearing from the living room like a ghost.

“I... I didn't mean to...” You stammered, asking yourself what was your mistake.

Her footsteps didn't stop despite your attempt to apologize, disappearing down the old elevator.

“Great...” you whispered, shaking your head.

The days went by. There were no more talking, no more broken cups. The fear you felt was gradually changing to curiosity. What the hell was that reproach about? Were you afraid of her? Of course you were. You knew who she was, the things she was capable of.

One morning, calm as the others, you were cleaning the dust from the stairs, wiping the cloth over the frame of that portrait; the portrait of a stoic woman, with a cold look but undeniable beauty. It was Donna, you knew it was her. You wondered what kind of problems she had, what tormented her so much. Why she didn’t want to show her face, one that you thought was beautiful.

“What is wrong with you?” You asked, looking at the cold eyes of the painting, shaking your head.

“(Y/N),” a hoarse voice interrupted you in your absurd dialogue. The lady in black was standing in the hall. You didn't know how long she had been there, watching you.

“Oh, Lady Beneviento,” you said embarrassed, with a polite smile.

“Who were you talking to?” She asked curiously, tilting her head slightly.

“Oh, I... With no one, with, with myself,” you responded. Actually, you weren't lying.

“Do you talk to yourself?” She wanted to know, getting a bit closer to the stairs.

“Yes, well, it helps me to pass the time,” you said, trying to make sure that the trembling of your hands wasn't so noticeable.

The lady in black nodded slowly, clasping her hands in front of her.

“Do you know how to sew?”

“Sew? Oh, sure,” you said, scratching the back of your neck nervously. “And I'm pretty good at it, to be honest.”

“Fine. Come with me,” the lady said, ignoring your joking attempt, turning around and walking away from you again.

You, of course, followed her silently to the old workshop where she spent most of the time.

Without saying a word, she placed a chair next to a sewing machine and motioned for you to go with her.

“What do you want me to do, my lady?” You asked curiously, while Donna searched through the fabrics.

“The machine has broken. Until my brother comes to fix it, I need you to help me make the dresses for these dolls,” Donna said with a dry tone, handing you the needle and thread and pointing to two porcelain figures.

“Oh, okay,” you said, taking the objects, accidentally brushing her incredibly soft pale hand.

“Will you be able to do it?” She asked, handing you several fabrics.

“Sure, of course, my lady,” you responded, nodding.

“I hate that,” the lady in black said with a growl. You opened your eyes, surprised and confused, looking for a thousand ways to apologize, you still didn't know why.

“What?” You asked, sounding truly stupid.

“I have a name, you know?” She said with a reproachful tone.

“I don’t…” you stammered, looking around erratically.

“My name is Donna, not my lady,” she said nervously, tightly grabbing one of the gray fabrics. “I don't want you to call me that way again. Is that clear?”

You, almost out of breath from those words, nodded slowly, forcing your legs to stop shaking.

“As you wished my... Donna,” you whispered softly, trying to distract yourself from that conversation.

“Your Donna?” she asked with a different tone, an amused one? “I think you're confused, (Y/N). You’re my (Y/N).”

“Oh, of course, I... I didn’t mean to say that you… I...” You stammered, digging the needle into your finger due to your agitated hands.

“I was just joking,” she murmured, sighing and returning to the fabrics. “You are still afraid of me…”

“No, no. I…” You said hurriedly. You began to think that silence was your ally in that house, not your enemy. You wish you were dusting and talking only to yourself at that moment.

“Look at that doll over there,” Donna said, pointing to it. “I want a dress just like that one.”

“I... Okay,” you said, relieved to return to your increasingly appreciated silence.

Time passed slowly, with the only sound of an old clock breaking the calm of that sinister workshop. The two of you sewed in silence. You were surprised by the skill and delicacy with which she treated each of her works. A feared, dangerous woman did everything possible to ensure that the dolls she created were perfect.

From time to time, you looked at the side of her face; a pale face, partially covered by that horrible black veil. A normal ear, black hair apparently tied up... There was nothing that made you think that this woman was a monster, as the villagers liked to say. For some reason, you felt some discomfort being around her. Not because of her subtle lavender scent or because of the fear she might give you. You felt that somehow, you needed to set the record straight, that you had to let her know that you weren't as scared as she thought.

“Donna,” you said, in a tone so low. You doubted she had heard it.

The lady in black turned her head slowly, but without stopping sewing that small dress.

“I'm sorry,” you said, playing with the black thread in your hand.

“What are you sorry about?” She asked, looking back at the dress.

“I'm sorry I said... Well, I'm sorry you think that...” You stammered, feeling horribly ridiculous.

“I don't like when you stutter, (Y/N). Speak clearly, please,” she asked you kindly.

“I'm not afraid of you,” you said, closing your eyes and praying that Donna wouldn't look at you right at that moment.

“Sei una bugiarda,” she whispered, shaking her head.

You frowned, since you didn't understand her words.

“What? Sorry, I don't understand.”

“I said...” The doll maker said, with anger showing in her voice. “…You are a liar.”

“No, I'm not lying,” you said, stopping sewing and crossing your arms. “Maybe, maybe at first I was afraid. I'm not going to deny it but... This time I've been here... Well, the truth is that I can't complain. What I want to say is that... I’m, I’m comfortable with you,” you said, feeling a knot in your stomach, as if you weren't really just telling the truth, as if those words were hiding something else, something that you couldn't, or didn't want to see.

“Are you?” She asked, also leaving the small dress next to her.

You nodded.

“This is the first time someone has said something like that to me. Excuse me if it's hard for me to believe it,” Donna said crestfallen, playing with her hands in her lap. That was like she was feeling shame too. Curious

There were no more words. After that declaration of sincerity, you returned to your work, to your needle and thread. Donna didn't seem to think about it. You, on the other hand, began to notice a different nervousness when you were next to her.

Time, days, weeks, months continued to pass. You couldn't say that you had a good relationship with Donna, but it improved a lot. Now, she allowed you to read next to her. Little by little you began to have more developed conversations. Always about banal and absurd topics, but conversations, conversations that didn’t include the words: I'm sorry.

That kind of a beginning of a friendship made your attitude change, looking for the lady in black yourself, wanting to spend more time with her. Maybe it was your imagination, but you had the feeling she was doing exactly the same.

Many times, when you were cleaning the dust in the living room, she would appear by surprise, approaching you, pretending to look for a book on one of the shelves. You knew she was pretending, since she always picked up the same essay about mountain plants.

What was happening? You were dying to find out.

“Happy birthday, (Y/N),” you sighed as you opened your eyes. It was your first birthday in that house. You weren't expecting calls from your friends or your family. Surely they thought you were dead a long time ago. It was not something strange in that village.

You went down the stairs yawning, passing by the portrait that, for a while, began to give you chills. It was no longer fear, or uncertainty, it was something else, something you were ashamed to say.

On top of the dining room table, there was something different. It seemed as if… As if someone had given you a gift. A beautiful rose decorated what looked like a carefully wrapped package. Next to it there was a card.

You picked it up suspiciously, wondering who had been thoughtful enough to send you something like that. There was no way you believed Donna had anything to do with it.

I hope you can enjoy your birthday the same way I enjoy your company.

Donna

“What? You're kidding me?” You whispered with wide eyes and trembling hands. Had it been her? It seemed incredible. Would it be a trap? There was only one way to find out.

You unwrapped the small package carefully. You didn't know what to expect and you didn't know why your heart was beating so fast.

“Oh, wow...” You whispered when you took a small bracelet with gold and silver tones out of the box. It seemed like something very expensive and unexpected. “My God… It’s amazing…”

“Do you like it?” a familiar soft and hoarse voice spoke behind you. There was Donna, with a formal but nervous posture, studying your gestures. Frightened, you put your hand on your chest.

“Donna, I... You didn't have to,” you said, smiling, running your fingers through the small golden flowers that adorned the bracelet.

“I wanted to do it,” she said, abruptly.

You nodded gratefully, awkwardly trying to place the gift on your wrist.

“Wait, let me help you.”

Donna approached slowly, taking the bracelet in her hand and wrapping it around your wrist. The touch of her skin against yours made the hair on the back of your neck stand up. Maybe it was because she had never been so close to you, or maybe it was because you wanted her to be that close.

“I... Thank you very, very much,” you said, looking at your now decorated wrist.

Her hand stayed in yours, you assumed due to inertia. Her fingers played with yours naturally, but with the feeling that they had no intention of letting yours go.

“You deserve it. I... I, I like you're here with me,” she said shyly, pushing her hand away from you when she realized where it was.

“It's quite a compliment my... Donna,” you said nervously, not knowing whether to go back or advance a few inches, confused by the feeling of wanting to do it.

“Your Donna,” she repeated with an amused tone. You smiled back and for a moment, a kind of out-of-nowhere tension came between you.

“I... I better go to prepare breakfast,” you said, making the decision to move away. She sighed and shook her head.

“Let me do it myself. Today is your birthday. Also, it's a great day. Would you like to have breakfast outside? You know, together,” she asked, looking away from you.

“Of course, I would love to...” You sighed, staring into her black veil.

From that moment on, something you couldn't see had begun. You no longer ate separately, you had stopped distancing yourself. You began to eat together, to watch movies together, in short, to be together.

You already knew what things you could say without make her mad, the things you could talk about without fear of punishment. In an instant everything became different, almost as if it were a dream, or a creation of your mind to make your life a bit more pleasant.

Of all the people in the village, you never imagined you would have feelings for one of the lords. Yes, feelings. You could no longer deny your nervousness when being with her, your heartbeat every time she touched you. Maybe you were losing your mind, or maybe it was already lost.

One night, like every other night for a while, you looked at the bracelet on your wrist in the moonlight. Sleeping was a luxury that your thoughts no longer allowed you to do. You thought about her, about Donna. You wondered why people said those things about her, why they thought she was a monster when she never was such a thing for you. You were also looking for an excuse to stop feeling the things you felt, to refuse to admit that you were falling in love with her.

“(Y/N)! (Y/N)!” A squeaky voice brought you out of your self-pity. The Angie doll suddenly came into your room, jumping onto the bed and shaking you.

“Angie, what's wrong? What do you want?” You asked, moving the wooden arms away from your body.

“It's Donna, Donna has problems,” the doll said, visibly nervous. You stood up immediately, frowning.

“What problems? What's wrong?” You asked following the puppet out of the room.

“She has lost her mind again! Help her, help her, please!” Angie shouted, dragging to the old elevator.

“Okay, okay, calm down...” you said nervously, trying not to trip over anything in the dark.

You knew that Donna sometimes suffered from anxiety attacks, that her mental problems were always lurking. You had always left her alone. You were never allowed to help her.

“Donna?” You asked entering the bedroom, where the lady in black was, sitting in the corner, balancing with her knees on her chest. “Donna, what's wrong?”

“No! Stay away!” The lady in black screeched, putting a hand in front of her. “They, they will catch you!”

“They? What are you talking about?” You asked carefully, approaching slowly and crouching down next to her. “Hey, Donna, calm down.”

“Go away! I don't want them to hurt you!” She screamed again, hitting the wooden floor with her fists. That had to hurt.

You, ignoring her delirious screams, grabbed her wrists to prevent them from going down again.

“Come on, calm down, Donna...” You whispered, trying hard to keep her hands from moving. “Everything is fine, I'm here.”

“They, they whisper things to me... they want, they want to hurt us...” She murmured, with her gaze lost, shaking her head.

You were so nervous that you hadn't even noticed a small detail. The black veil that covered her face had disappeared. The mysterious Donna Beneviento revealed herself to you without wanting it.

It was a beauty incomparable to any other, a scared and hurt face, a scar that took up part of the right side of her face. That was the reason. That's why she wore the veil. Her black hair was tied up in a messy bun, harmoniously framing her features. You could have been staring at her face, at her newfound beauty. But it wasn't the time.

“They want to leave me alone!” The lady screamed, fighting against the force you exerted on her arms. “Get out!”

“Donna, come on, relax. There's no one here…” You said, pushing your way through her spasms, kneeling in front of her. “No one wants to hurt you.”

“No... You will abandon me... They have told me... You are a bitch!”

You shook your head, feeling deeply sad at being unable to bring poor Donna back to her senses.

“No, stop, honey... You're going to hurt yourself, come on, stop, Donna, come to your senses. I'm here with you, I will never abandon you. Do you hear me?”

When her attempt to hurt her hands stopped, you took the opportunity to bring yours to her face, cupping it firmly so she could look at you. Her eye was red from crying.

Her breathing relaxed a bit, letting her arms fall to the floor and looking at you in panic.

“That's it... Relax. Nobody is going to hurt you. I would never allow it... Come on, breathe, breathe with me...”

She followed your orders, despite still being nervous. Your hands caressed her face lovingly as you brought her forehead against yours.

“Okay, Donna... Breathe... You're safe...” You whispered affectionately as her hands returned to your wrists, gripping them tightly but with no intention of causing harm.

“(Y/N)...” The lady in black sighed, moving away from you and bringing one of her hands to her uncovered face. Unfortunately, she realized that you had seen her.

“Shhh, no, it's okay,” you said when she thrashed around in your arms again, trying to escape your grip.

“Let me go! Don't look at me!” Donna screamed, pushing you angrily, causing you to fall to the floor backwards.

“Hey, hey, come on. It's okay,” you said, standing up, grabbing her wrist when she was about to run away. “Donna, stop.”

“No, no... Why did you have to do it?!” She wailed with a heartbreaking cry, stamping her feet hard on the floor, making even Angie hide behind a piece of furniture.

“I just want to help you,” you said, with tears in your eyes. “You have nothing to be ashamed of. “Come on, come here…” you whispered, extending your hand towards her, who pushed it away with a resounding smack.

“I'm a monster,” the lady in black said sobbing, turning her back on you.

“No, no, Donna, you're not,” you said, approaching cautiously, putting a hand on her shoulder. You didn't know the limit of her patience, especially in that state. “You are a beautiful woman and… And a kind one. I love spending the day with you, reading with you... You are the most beautiful woman I have ever met and I...”

“Do you think you can fool me? Do you think you can make me believe that you appreciate me? That’s what you want? Do you want me to fall in love even more and then abandon me?”

“What? No...” You said with a sad look, without paying attention to her words. At least at first.

“You’re lying”

“I'm not lying,” you whispered as she turned towards you, head down, embarrassed by her appearance. “You are… You are special to me.”

“Do you know how many maids like you have told me those stupid words?” She asked, abruptly removing your hand from her shoulder.

“No, I don’t know.”

“They were all the same, liars who only wanted to rob me... Insult me, some of them even tried to kill me... You are all the same... You’re just bitches, all of you.”

“Donna, stop saying those things... Your words are hurting me,” you sobbed, shaking your head and trying unsuccessfully to caress her cheek.

“And to think that you were different from them hurts me too. I thought you felt something for me,” she accused with a sigh, with a dangerous look.

“Donna, I...” You said, incredulous at the pain in her words. “I feel something for you. I don't know what horrible things they've done to you but... But...”

“Shut up. Look at me! She screamed madly, grabbing your head tightly, making you look at her face, making you unable to look anywhere else. “No one could feel anything for me, I'm horrible and you know it. I really loved you, (Y/N). I really thought you were different.”

“Well, I'm different,” you protested, lowering her arms abruptly.

“Get out my sight. Take whatever you want from the house and disappear forever. I don't want to think you're telling the truth just for breaking my heart later. Leave before I feel the need to hurt you.”

“What? No, I don't want to leave,” you said with a grimace of displeasure. “I don't want to leave. I want to stay with you!” You screamed, desperate at your inability to reason with her.

“You’re lying!”

“I’m not lying! I love you!” You shouted, confessing a truth that was already beginning to be too heavy on your head.

“You can't love me!” Donna screamed back, pushing you angrily by your shoulders. “You can’t…”

Before she could react, you approached her, grabbing her chin, taking advantage of that small moment of delirium. Your hands traveled to her waist, gently pulling her towards your body. One of them went up to her cheek, caressing it slowly as your head leaned towards hers, closing the distance between you with a slow, but firm kiss.

She gasped in shock, but she made no effort to move away from you. Her entire body relaxed and her hands rested on your cheeks, keeping your lips glued to hers, not wanting to lose that contact, that sensation that your kisses caused.

“(Y/N)...” She whispered into your lips, separating slowly before launching herself into them again, deepening the kiss, in a messy but affectionate way.

“I love you, Donna...” You said sobbing, cupping her face in your hands, with your lips still very close to hers.

“You, you’ve kissed me,” the doll maker said, confused, but not wanting to move an inch. “No one had ever kissed me…”

“That's because they didn't feel what I feel for you...” You said tenderly, sincerely, grabbing the hand that rested on your cheek. “I don't care if you don't believe me, but every day I thank Mother Miranda for send me with you, Donna. I don't care if you don't believe me when I tell you that you are beautiful, that I hate the veil that covers your face. I don't mean to trick you, to hurt you, I just... I just want to be with you... My Donna...”

“Do you want to be with me?” She asked uncertainly, studying your features very closely, her voice trembling.

“I want”

“Aren't you going to abandon me?”

“Never”

An innocent smile spread across her face before kissing you again in an intense, erratic way, not wanting to let you even take a breath.

“I, I would really like to be with you, (Y/N)... I... No one has ever felt that way about me...”

You laughed softly, kissing her quickly again and hugging her tightly, making her feel safe in your arms.

“Let me love you, Donna...” You whispered into her shoulder, pressing her body tightly against yours. “Let me spend my life with you, enjoy how wonderful you are…”

She withdrew slowly, with a sigh that told you something was wrong. Her hands moved down your hips, meeting your own hands as her gaze focused on yours. Her expression had changed.

“I wish I could believe you, (Y/N), but I can’t, not yet,” Donna whispered, bringing a hand to your chest, regaining the distance she had lost. “I have always been so alone…”

“Not anymore, Donna, you're not alone anymore. You don't have to trust me right now but... I will do whatever it takes to show you that my feelings are sincere,” you said, not letting desperation force you to kneel and beg for a chance.

Her gaze lowered back to your lips, wanting to kiss them again but, at the last moment, she regretted it.

“If you knew the things you make me feel, how fast my heart beats when you're around...” The lady whispered sadly, distrustfully.

“I believe I know. I feel the same way,” you said, letting your heart speak for you.

“Don't break my heart, please...” Donna whispered again, now gently kissing your lips.

“I would never do it,” you said between kisses, letting yourself be carried away by her sweet caresses, caresses that wandered over your body, exploring it cautiously.

“I want to keep kissing you,” Donna said, getting closer, begging not to lose that new sensation for her.

“As you wish, my Donna...”

#donna beneviento #donna beneviento x reader #requests #re8 donna #re8 village #oneshot

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regular-lord-reckoner · 11 months ago

Text

welp, guess who hit burnout again ?!?!

i did !!

primarily because of some bad news i got last week. it's nothing bad bad, it's just some aggravating bullshit i have to deal with (basically i missed some payments for my therapist and i thought it was like...3 or 4, but it's like...8?? the lady that does her payroll is going to look into it because my deductible kicked in somewhere in there, but i don't think for most of it so i'm just annoyed at myself for letting this pile up like this but what can ya do!! thankfully she's been really forgiving and understanding, especially because a lot of these missed payments happened around when my dad died so i do appreciate that and will be making it up to her as soon as i can; i don't see her again until april so hopefully by then i can get a little more caught up

i also broke my favorite mirror and my pipe like a day apart from each other (the pipe i'm not as broken up about because i'm starting a tolerance break soon anyway and the guy i bought it from still makes the same one so we're all good there but the mirror???? the fucking mirror!?!)

okay so this goddamn mirror.

i genuinely don't even know how this happened

i had just put our dog down for his nap (yes, he has a nap time and yes i take care of him like he's my child now.........he's grown on me) and i went upstairs to use my bathroom and get my medicine and i may have accidentally knocked into something on my way there, but i swear i wasn't that close and as soon as i got into the bathroom i just heard a commotion and turned around and my dad's guitar fell over, hit the mirror, the mirror hit ??? and shattered

specifically into two pieces, one kinda small, i could have probably fit it into a cardboard box, but the other piece was too big and i would have had to break it up somehow without getting more glass everywhere and i could already see what looked like glitter all over the carpet so i said fuck that

i ended up having to get two very thick trash bags to bag it up and carefully transport it downstairs and all i could think was, "please don't let this fucking mirror cut through this plastic anymore than it already has (because it had a little) and end up slicing my hand up real bad and then what? i probably have to drive myself to the nearest walk in because no one else is here right now and it would take too long for an ambulance to get out here, plus..........expensive so...be careful!!!"

the whole ordeal ate up an entire hour of my fucking day because i had to just sit and stare at it for about half an hour before i could even clean it up, i just froze

then all the transporting it downstairs and getting it outside with the other trash and texting our family friend who hauls the trash off for all of us to let him know to be careful with it, yeah

it hasn't helped that i've somehow gotten behind on part of my work and my inbox lately has been consistently in the 200+ range and i keep finding all these stat referrals that aren't marked even though everyone literally just got an email the other fucking day to make sure those are marked but nope!! so now i feel pressure to get through as many of them as i can so needless to say my work days lately have been thusly:

i get up at 6:30 am. i do a little work. sometime around 7:30 i go lie back in bed for about an hour before i get up to get the dog up and take him outside and feed him his breakfast.

while he's eating i do the dishes and sometimes will get the trash all gathered up and set out to be taken off. i also feed the cat and check to see if he needs anything, any litter or water or whatever else.

sometimes i'll do some of my own cleaning, like my bathroom or start on my laundry (i think last week i ended up doing everything: sheets, towels, clothes, the dogs blankets and towels)

oh, i also give him a bath now every thursday so he's not stinky and it helps with his skin because his breed is prone to getting these little bumps so weekly baths help with that apparently

we'll go on walks throughout the day, too. usually whenever i take him out to go potty but sometimes if i get an extra bit of free time and the weather is nice we got for a little walk together

in between all of this i try to pop in to get some of my actual work done and on good days i do mange to scoot along pretty well. on bad days it's been kinda like how it's been for the past few weeks and i end up staying up until our records system literally begins to stop communicating with our patient scheduling/demographics system which means i can't do shit anymore. that's usually around 11:30 pm

somewhere in there i eat a few meals slowly over the course of a few hours and often don't even up finishing them because i've gotten the ick or they've gone too cold so i save it for later or just toss it out

i go to sleep usually around midnight or 1 am but again on bad nights it's like...almost 2 am. and then it's back up at 6. or my new favorite...wake up at 5 and then i'm not able to get back to sleep!

doesn't help that whenever i don't get enough sleep my neuromuscular shit gets a lot worse so i spend all day just lightly vibrating with tiredness (quite literally, it's just all day minimal shakes which is fun when all you do is type)

i would just take extra of my medicine but i lowkey got shamed by a pharmacist for refilling my meds too soon so....there's that

the last time i went to refill i didn't have any problems, normally the automated system will tell me, "hey, bitch, you can't refill this yet, slow down!" and so i know to wait a few more days and try again (unless i'm about to be out before then, of course), but that didn't happen, it just told me it would be ready tomorrow so tomorrow i went and evidently it was not eligible to be refilled that soon and it was just the way she was looking at me when she said, "didn't you just have this refilled [whatever the date what]??" which like...yeah, admittedly it was a little sooner than usual but like..........sometimes i just need more of my medicine ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

pretty sure i was doing a lot of physical shit around then so yeah, i probably took more of my pills than normal....i realize i should probably just bite the bullet and contact my neurologist to see if he can up my prescription before my next visit in september where we normally go over that because evi-fuck-ing-dently if i need a little bit more sometimes it's gonna be a whole thing now

and of course, me being me, i'm like...apologetic, just like, "okay, well i can just come back another day, sorry" and she said, "well, we can refill it if you want to wait," which like....................why did you give me grief over it then?! but then when i asked about how long would it be she was like, "i dunno, 20 minutes or you can just come back later," which is hell to tell my autistic ass so i was just like, "uh, i guess i'll come back later..." which she seemed to be glad to be rid of me and likewise, so!

i went and cried in my car for a bit because once again just frustrated that i felt humiliated over that because it wasn't that deep, but it just kinda reminded me of high school and how i purposefully avoided going to the nurse's office to get my medicine because she was such a fucking asshole to me (she was the one who after i asked if my dad could come pick me up because i was sick started grilling me on my condition to which her conclusion was, "so, what, are you going to stay in bed for the rest of your life or something?" with just pure hatred in her voice, i literally didn't have an answer for that. she did not last long as the nurse, surprisingly! she was very unpopular, i can't even imagine the other fucked up shit she probably said to my classmates)

but yeah, just...hey, i need this to literally function. i'm not trying to hurt anyone. i'm not trying to make your job, that i know is already very hard, any harder. i just want my goddamn medicine. i just walked through over-stimulation city and am going to do it twice today (it's costco btw and the pharmacy is alllllll the way in the back), just......please do not give me a hard time about this for the love of god

also, if you're wondering, "gee anna, i'd just switch pharmacies if i were you, that sounds like a lot of hassle!" yes, i have considered that, but you see............my job's got me by the balls on this one. in the past couple of years they've introduced their own pharmacy and technically...........technically i'm supposed to be filling my medicine with them.

there's literally a clause about like, "don't you fucking dare fill [my type of medication] with anyone but us!!" but like......somehow i've managed to make it this far without them noticing??

and costco themselves have just sort of made it work?? because i think my original script was actually for a larger supply, but i guess if i got that filled it would force me to use my work's so costco just fills it to a lesser degree and somehow it flies under the rader. i dunno !!

but !! i've been using them instead of my work because from everything i've heard.....our pharmacy sux !!!!

i won't get into all of it (but like my mom has said some of her medicine with like...clearly what it is with her name and everything on it was left lying out where patients and god and everyone could see it....not great)

they also just make a lot of mistakes and i'm skeptical if they store things correctly so suffice to say there's a lot of reasons i just don't want to deal with it, it's also apparently hard to just...get your meds from them because of how they do things. so i really don't want to make this process any more challenging than what it already is, but yeah. a little bit frustrating, i guess

in addition to.....all of this, i also had got to thinking, "damn, i've been working a lot of 50 hour weeks lately, how long have i been doing this? a few months now?"

i knew it was around the time my dad was dying because i remember quite literally watching him in his hospice bed over the top of my computer to make sure he didn't wake up again and try to take his oxygen off

turns out it's uh....been a year now

right around this time last year i started working 50 hours a week.

granted there were a few weeks, especially at the beginning, where i would work one 50 hour week and then a 44 hour week and then 50 hours again and 40 back and forth like that because i was worried i'd get in trouble but eventually i realized no one way saying anything so eventually (and with a few exceptions, of course) i just started doing one after the other and now i'm here......kiiiiiiiiinda burnt out

which isn't surprising really, when i think about it

i was quite literally experiencing burn out to the point of serious thoughts about not being here anymore and engaging in self harm through my meltdowns so i guess you could say i was a little stressed last year but i pretty much had to try to put it all on pause and just...get to work in so many senses and i know i let a lot of things fall through the cracks. too many probably. but i cannot emphasize enough just how much i was breaking down and how hard it was for me to hold my shit together during that time.

i didn't want anyone to know it had gotten that bad, i felt like a monster and every day it's like i did something else horrendously wrong or said the wrong thing and sometimes i really did and sometimes it was just my warped perception of things and i started to lose the ability to tell the difference and it all just congealed into one big ball of stress

i spent a lot of therapy sessions honestly just bawling my eyes out because of it after which i usually felt better for a little while, but it would slowly build up again and again because i still hadn't figured out what works and what doesn't as far as self-care goes and what even are my needs and god this is all so fucking overwhelming and the spots on my dad's lungs just keep getting worse and he keeps getting weaker and my mom's falling apart and i'm falling apart and everything's falling apart, but not me!! never me, not yet!!

so i just kept going. and still am.

yes, i've had a few breaks and those have helped tremendously. i'm taking another one next month (bet you can't guess which week) and i'm just going to stay here, maybe do some cleaning on my closet and hopefully catch up on sleep

this, so far, is what seems to work

when i feel myself approaching my limit, i shut off essentially. i go into autopilot

i do what i need to get done, get it all done and then crash and recover as much as possible until i reach the next big rest (which is usually just a week at a time but i'll take it !!!) and along the way i just try to pick up different modalities of self-care and prioritizing my health and wellbeing as i go

like today, i managed to sleep in until 11 am. beautiful !! stunning !!

first time i've felt like a human being in ???

i took advantage of this renewed energy to put my efforts into putting together something special for my niece's kids.

unfortunately, their dad's father passed away earlier this week. sudden heart attack, apparently.

the younger one doesn't really have as much attachment to him, i don't think, but the older one is really torn up about this from what her mom has told us

he used to babysit for them a lot so he was a big part of her life. they were actually supposed to get ice cream that day because he promised it to her if she did well on one of her tests and she did but that obviously didn't end up happening

that's two of her grandfathers now she's lost in about 6 months and my heart is just broken for her

her mom said already that sometimes she just bursts into tears out of nowhere and when she asks her, "honey, what's wrong?" she says she misses my dad (which hey.......big same. the sudden crying about it and everything).

his funeral will be on monday which my mom won't be able to go to but said she wanted to still go up there tomorrow just to be with the kids if nothing else to give them some extra comfort

i'm staying behind so i can watch the critters (and because i don't think right now i'm up for all of that honestly) but i did want to send them my love so i took about an hour today to shop for some presents for them

i got them both these really neat stuffed animals (a dinosaur for the younger one because they're her favorite; it roars and lights up and everything) and a bunny that also makes a cute noise and lights up and they're both nice and cuddly since her mom also said right now all the older one wants to do is curl up with her blanket and watch her favorite shows

i also got the younger one some bluey dolls since that's her favorite right now and a little bracelet that looks like one i know she has and loves except this one has a little purple butterfly on it !!

i got her sister a really nice princess crown and this cool lip balm thing with a container that has some of her favorite characters on it so i hope she likes that and i got her a bracelet that's similar to her sister's but it says "don't give up" on it

mom's going to take them the gifts tomorrow so i hope they like them and most of all, i hope they help. i walked up and down the kid's toy aisles so much i think i was making people nervous with me being a single adult just going up and down the aisles constantly but i was really trying to put a lot of thought into what would cheer them up and give them comfort right now

after that i made a few more stops to get me a few little treats even though i probably don't need them, but they made me happy so...there!

i came home, relaxed for a little bit, took the dog for a walk/potty break, fed him his dinner, washed some dishes, took out all the trash, took a shower and i finally ate dinner around 10 pm

so yeah. been....pretty busy lately.

i think part of what's contributing to this particular burnout is that i just feel like i haven't stopped in....ages now. i just keep going and going and going and going

but !!! if nothing else this tells me i really need to step up my skills for dealing with, well, me.

although i reserve the right as a scorpio to close the door to myself for a while and emerge dramatically when i feel rejuvenated, there are...better ways of approaching things, i think, so we're going to work on that

namely i'm going to work on getting more sleep. i think that's one of the biggest contributing factors because i'm just exhausted all of the goddamn time and being exhausted leads me to being on edge all day long (even when i start out the day in an awesome mood sometimes, over time and as i sit there working it's like the life just drains out of me)

so we're going to work on that and we're also going to work on our diet. although processed foods have kept me steady for all these years due to their dependability and extreme convenience, i'm at an age where i really need to be eating a lot more vegetables and actually start cooking most of my meals

going to work on that and eventually the plan is to also start growing some of my own food because another thing too is like.....every goddamn product in the store anymore is owned by some bullshit genocide supporting monopoly entity so like......the less i can contribute to that the better, i figure

i also really hope to get to my closet soon because i know i keep talking about it and it and it's been forever but i just haven't had the capacity for it so it got put on hold but fingers crossed on my break i can at least start to chip away at it

which....speaking of stuff around the house, that's been another thing

it's becoming clear to my mom and i that this house, beautifully made by my father as it is, really needs some love put into it

the entire thing honestly needs a good deep clean, but in addition to that i'm pretty sure there's mold upstairs. i don't know about downstairs, but i'm 99.9% sure it's up here and i think part of it probably has to do with the fact that the doors i have that go outside don't.....close completely ?? heh

i may have accidentally fallen into them at one point and knocked them out of frame and no matter what i've done to try to fix it (mostly slamming against it from the other side like i'm a fucking football player) so i've done what i can to mitigate the slight crack that's at the top of the door but i'm pretty sure moisture has been getting in anyway so that's fun !!

those doors obviously need to be replaced and there's also a skylight in my bathroom that i think has gotten some water damage around it so that might be contributing as well, but that needs to be fixed, too

there's also some ceiling work that my dad had started on in their bedroom but didn't get to finish before he got sick so that needs to be finished and of course the water heater could still go at any time

the plumber was able to get it back to somewhat full capacity, but even still i've noticed the hot water runs out a lot faster than it used too, so that'll be something else

we also hadn't really realized until all of this with my dad just how inaccessible our house is to get into if you struggle to walk or need a wheelchair

we did what we could with my dad's chair and he'd hold on to one of us to get into the house while holding his cane with the other hand, but like that one night he was so weak after he fell earlier in the day and then all day at the emergency getting checked out, he nearly fell and busted his open and instead ended up collapsing in the hallway just inside the garage entrance and we had to call ems to help come get him up out of the floor so.....we really need to at the very least have hand rails installed at some entrance point of this house that'll make it easier (the backdoor technically has them but it would be a trek for someone with mobility issues of any kind to get back there to them)

the carpets all either need a really good deep clean or to be taken up and replaced with either more carpet or something else

and i'm sure there's more i'm not thinking of right now, but suffice to say, it's....a lot. and no, it doesn't all have to be done right now, right now but the sooner the better for some of them for sure

fortunately my dad left us some money that initially he said we could use for a trip but i think we're going to instead use to do a lot of this stuff around the house that needs to be done

in the meantime, i'm going to try to clean as i go as much as possible. getting all that stuff out from around the water heater really just makes me want to rent a dumpster so we can just throw a bunch of this shit away because honestly a lot of it is just junk at this point that's not even worth donating or giving to someone

some of it yes and definitely any clothes we find that are still good quality, but a lot of this shit i would love nothing more than to just chuck into a dumpster and feel like i can breathe a little easier because it's nowhere near hoarder level i don't think, but for my taste it's starting to feel a little claustrophobic

in the mean time, i'm also going to try to start reading more because i really did used to enjoy it and i think my brain's starting to finally get to a point where it's like, "hey, i can handle new information !! let's start learning again !! let's start reading a whole bunch !!" so i'm excited to start that

i'm still journaling and working my puzzles and spending time outside connecting with nature so these are all also things that i think help me out a lot that i intend to keep up

i also want to start teaching myself how to play my dad's guitar soon because i've always wanted to do that and i think it would bring me a lot of joy if i could manage to learn

i'm also just, as weird as it sounds, letting myself be more autistic, i guess ??

i hadn't realized until recently just how much i've suppressed a lot of stimming and self-soothing behaviors and how much better i feel when i just.....let myself do them

i've struggled with being perceived even when i know i'm completely alone for some time now, i remember even talking about it with my last therapist like a decade ago so this has been a thing

i used to even cover the vents when i went to the bathroom and would shower in the dark because i couldn't pinpoint why i felt like i was always being watched but just in case aliens or the government or whoever were secretly spying on me i was going to avoid them !!

anyway, hey, younger me, turns out you're just really neurodivergent, babe! like i'm starting to think you're more than just autistic, you might also have a decent helping of adhd, dunno, it's kind of slowly starting to emerge which is weird but i'll give you a for instance......i forgot to sign up for my insurance this year!!

i kept getting the alert on my paycom thing whenever i log in every day and i even checked it a few times and was like, "oh yeah, i need to do that," but just kept forgetting the second i would look away from it and anyway, the other day i get an email that's like, "hey, so you've been automatically enrolled in your issuance this year since you didn't wanna do it yourself :P" basically so i do have it, but what's my plan like ?? is it a good one ?? i dunno just yet but i guess we'll see. they're all pretty much the same at this point but i think i did notice it's a different provider so...woohoo, i'm slowly but surely collecting all the insurance types like they're fucking pokemon

anyway, shit like that's been happening more and more lately, but i'm trying to get a handle on that, too because i'm already in a big enough hole as is and quite literally cannot afford to dig myself any deeper so we're gonna do what we need to in order to be well and be somewhat healthy and get this brain sorted out and hopefully, eventually, i'll get to reach a point where i can put down a few of the balls i've been juggling and just kinda....take it easy for a bit

again, and i know i always say this, but i fear i always sound out of touch with reality when i talk about my life like this and so i want to make it clear i do acknowledge all of this could be much, much worse

my life is by far nowhere near as bad as it could be and in a lot of ways i have many things working in my favor and that are of great help to me, so i'm extremely grateful for that. i haven't always been, admittedly, but i've also had a lot of complicated feelings to unpack especially in the past year that made it difficult, but i've come out the other side of that now and i really do just want to mature and focus on growing and part of that is my gratitude for the things in my life that are going right and are immensely beneficial to my wellbeing

that being said, my life nevertheless still hast its challenges and although i blab a lot on here (probably more than i should) i do still tend to keep the majority or perhaps the intensity of how i really feel all to myself

i know there are definitely times that even i can admit that it's like, "uh, hey, the thing you're having a meltdown over really isn't worth being that upset about, it'll be okay........" because sure enough everything was/is totally fine and it's not a big deal, but it's hard to describe how in the moment it feels so much bigger and far more dire so what seems like a lot of dramatics and going through the motions on everyone else's end may all be for naught but like...it's still a tangible hell i end up going through that takes its toll on me, i'm just....used to it, lol

i've literally been getting overloaded since i was born and in some ways it feels like it's never stopped since then, the only problem was i didn't have an answer as to why until very recently so it's not like i wasn't doing anything about my mental health because i just wasn't prioritizing it, i didn't even know where to begin and my first attempt at getting help didn't even land close to what the real issue was so it put me off for a long time (to be fair, the therapy was also heavily focused on like.....my sister having just died, so that's at least part of why, i'm sure)

this really feels like the first time in either a very, very, very long time or possibly even ever that i've been able to just actually stop a little and catch my breath. feel like myself, my actual self. not the mask i've been poorly trying to keep together for forever now

a mask that part of me is hesitant still as i continue to take it off because what i'm realizing about myself is that a lot of who i am/who i've been was tied up in that so like.....naturally i'm starting to see a lot of shifts in the relationships around me and just how i think about myself as well and how i approach things

and it's hard because it's like.....am i being fair ?? am i taking everyone around me's feelings into consideration ?? because i'm so used to having to do that and tiptoe around and always feel like i'm walking on eggshells except my clumsy ass was just tromping through them anyway, always putting my foot in my mouth and saying the exact wrong thing that at the worst possible time and just hating myself more and more but not knowing how to fix it so i'd just princess caroline my relationships and focus on everyone else instead which makes people like you for that, but not so much the rest so there's this constant worry of, "is that all i'm good for? will i be replaced as soon as i stop being useful?" and not for nothing but like....it's happened before, so!!!

so....yeah. i've been unpacking a lot of things lately and just trying to sit with them and think about all of this and about who i want to be now and how to get there

the process is already happening and has been for about a year now, but it's a slow one unfortunately (and really all of this has been woefully too late, but that's what happens when you snooze, anna. you lose !!!) but like that asshole walter white once said, i am......awake, now. except instead of becoming an ego-maniacal abusive drug lord who destroys his family and everything he touches, i'm going to do...whatever the opposite of that is. in every sense

i hope i can grow into a person who is ultimately kind and loving and patient and stable and lovable and healed who has interesting hobbies like making music and maybe recreating some of the pictures she takes of the sky in the form of paintings if she gets good enough

as overwhelming as everything has felt lately i can also feel new possibilities unfurling in me and i can see so many roads and avenues i could go down in terms of growth and development and for the first time i'm staring to feel like i'm brave enough to do it or at least give it a shot

so that's what i hope for. that's what i'm working towards.

thee are going to be parts of me i know people aren't going to like, in particular my tendency to want to spend the majority of my time alone and with my own thoughts, at least for right now, but that's just something i feel as though i need to do and quite honestly, as though i've earned

in some regards, i've spent a good portion, if not almost all of my life in some form or fashion taking care of the people that i love. often in an emotional sense, but i like to think i've also stepped up to the plate in a lot of other ways even if i didn't do every single thing perfectly, i still at least tried

i think i've finally earned some time to focus on me and just me for a little bit.

not to say i won't help anyone with anything (i quite literally spend a good chunk of my time helping my mom now), but i can tell with everything in my being that i really, really need to just turn inwards for a little bit, focus on me, heal some more, mature some more and i think when i emerge from this cocoon i'm going to be....a decent looking butterfly!! (actually, i also hope i get hot. not like "oh, i buy these clothes or makeup or whatever" but just like...y'know, hot. when you invest in yourself hot, you know what i mean? idk it's getting late and i'm quite tired)

but yeah. think that's about it for now.

sorry this was so long, i've just clearly had a lot going on and have a lot on my mind and i like to just check in every so often to document where i'm at in this journey

wish it was a better update, but they can't all be good or we wouldn't be working towards anything, now would we?

i guess that's all for now.

a coupe of last things:

i saw a big yellow butterfly the other day when i was taking the dog out. i sort of associate yellow with my dad now because he loved yellow flowers, especially sunflowers, so whenever i see anything yellow, really, i think of him and of course butterflies are supposedly visitors so i think that might have been him saying hi, which i really needed

also, the cashier supervising the self check i was at today said, "you can use whichever one you want, darlin'," to me which made me smile a lot although they couldn't tell because i had a mask on but i said thank you and tried to smize as best as i could before scooting off to scan my items and get one step close to going back home

oh, and i started to cry a little earlier because on my way home i had to pass by the funeral home and in particular where i was sat at a red light i actually had a perfect view of the crematorium and right as i was looking at it i hear bert mccracken (who btw has apparently been pro-Palestinian for like a decade now so good on him; i knew i chose right in the divorce when everyone else went to gerard's !!) coming from my speakers going, "fill your lungs with smoke for the last tiiiiiime!!" and i started to laugh because like.....c'mon, that's kinda funny, but then i started to cry because i remember that day and then i just missed him but i also had to drive so we just shut that shit down and headed home and i still haven't cried yet so will probably do that tomorrow and some journaling. i think a big cry would help a lot so we'll see !!

as always, i hope if you're reading this you have a good weekend and can also get some rest from chaotic life and stress and all the other bullshit

i hope something good happens for you soon and that you also heal and can try to find some peace and comfort

i absolutely must go to sleep now so g'night !!! <3

#long post #just an update about me/my mental health/what i've been up to type of thing

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saltandrosemary · 10 months ago

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It’s interesting how s apparently fucking talks about sex and shit all the fucking time with their other best friend but turns into a bible clutching church lady when I dare fucking mention what happened on my date. Like wtf, be happy for me?? It’s a huge fucking bummer to be excited about my dating life finally feeling like it’s going somewhere and not just a date that I won’t see again after, and have my best friend immediately act almost repulsed and talk about how fucking lonely they are, as if I’m the one making them wait for someone who said explicitly that she’s not gonna date until she’s moved out and financially (which is nuts all on it’s own). S! You can go on dates!!! On the apps!! I’m not fucking stopping you, you are. You’re keeping yourself miserable to spare the possible pain of rejection and it’s not my fucking fault, it makes me feel so fucking shitty to have to like, tone down my excitement so they don’t feel bad about themselves. As if my getting a date with someone is a reflection on them. I got lucky!! Literally luck

Also!! I just learned that when they do laundry(god they do tiny tiny loads and it drives me fucking nuts! Who only washes six to ten things!?!?) they only wash what fits them. And if we didn’t share a fucking closet that would be okay but we do. I wash any fucking clothes I find, I have to because if I don’t, neither of us will have clean clothes. And they wear more than me!!! Like two outfits a day!! So I’m left with no clothes to wear, no pants and the stuff that does fit me, literally goes to the bottom of the pile because they don’t pick it up or wash it. I wash tons of stuff that doesn’t fit me!!! Why aren’t they washing my stuff too!! It kinda like, hurts my feelings in a weird way? Like, wtf have I been washing their many pairs of pants that I can’t wear anyways for? When they don’t wash my stuff and leave it on the ground it makes it harder for me to find it later because they’ll just throw more dirty clothes on top of it!!! The fucking laundry pile in the closet is also not my fault but I have to deal with it and take care of it. It feels unfair?

Like i know they didn’t mean to hurt my feelings but fuck man, being told to watch what I say bc they’re upset like I’m a toddler made me feel awful? I feel disgusting now? I’m so sorry I wanted to communicate tthe crotch of your shorts has holes. I should never Fucking mention the fact I have a vag or even any bodily functions. It’s because they thought I was gonna say something gross and I guess I did but fuvk dude. You have to get over it. I made you dinner, packed and helped you smoke two bowls and have been constantly by your side and reassuring you, I’m so sorry I said they crotch of the shorts was uncomfortable. Jesus Christ

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cherrysoulth · 2 years ago

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DIAMONDS I

💕Pairing: Jimin x Reader

✏️Genre/au: Non-Canon, Action, Smut, Mafia AU

✏️Rating: PG 18+, explicit

📝Wordcount: 5443

⚠️Warnings: Explicit smut

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Hii! Did you stumble across this work? Glad you're here 😊 Please, let me know your thoughts once you are finished. Feedback keeps me motivated to write 😁

Decided to write a one-shot of a parallel universe of The waiter because this song inspired me XD

Note that English is not my first language, so please if you find grammar mistakes, let me know. :)

My gratitude goes to @moonleeai for beta reading 💜

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Have it all

Rip our memories off the wall

All the special things I bought

They mean nothing to me anymore

But to you

They were everything we were

They meant more than every word

Now I know just what you love me for

~Sam Smith - Diamonds

Walking inside the party you made sure your posh, self-sufficient smile stayed up, never dropping the mask for the vultures of your mother’s so-called guests. Your break up with the magnate Jeon Jungkook, still fresh on everyone's mouth while your heart still bleeds inside the pitch black dress hugging your chest and puffing out all the way down to your knees. Your matching high heels are heard from your confident steps as you approach the hotel bar asking for a glass of champagne, looking perfectly modest at your parents eyes, while what you would like to chug down is a double of whiskey with ice.

The bastard was playing mafia king while you were a respectable lawyer with the law tattooed in your soul. Almost literally, since you had the date of the first big case you won permanently printed on the left side of your ribs. Your first case against drugs was nonetheless related to one of his associates and although you are thankful it was the case allowing you to uncover the whole web of lies he had been throwing over you, that truth hurt.

Your poor, stupid heart had fallen for the sweetness and gentleness he seemed to have in his; even the almost brutal passion he showed in the bedroom. But to you, love couldn’t get past the fundamental fact that he was part of a criminal organisation; that due to some of his decisions people died in the streets or dirty motels like rats. That those deaths were not only tragic on their own but that they also left families broken.

The only thing your love did for him, and having lived together up until that point, was to not call your friends at the DEA to put his ass in jail. Not that it would have been a smart move anyway without proof; you know you would have ended up dead and probably suffering before it. Very likely by one of his own men’s hands. However, you still had the audacity to tell him that it was the only reason you would step away and act like you had broken up for any other reason; like you hadn’t seen anything. Not that you had seen enough anyway.

Someone bumps into you as you walk away with your glass and you look at the gorgeous and ethereal creature that stands in front of you. He seems just as charmed by you because it feels like time has stopped since neither of you move, lost in each other’s eyes. It’s the reminder of Jungkook in freshman year at the university and how he had looked at you exactly like that, which sends you back to reality and you apologise to the man, asking for a cloth from the next waiter coming closer.

It’s your father approaching to offer to get it cleaned at the hotel laundry what sorts the situation. Jimin, who introduces himself to both of you, excuses himself and walks out of the bar towards the elevators, presumably to change his suit. Your father scowls you as soon as the door closes and you look at him, with an arched brow.

“It was an accident,” you mutter, not willing to take the blame.

“You would do yourself, and your mother, a favour if you behaved like the lady we taught you to be,” he whispers in an annoyed tone. “The break of your compromise with Mr. Jeon doesn’t need to be the end of your chances to marry a good suiter. The party is full of them. Make sure you cause a good impression,” he states before approaching and kissing your forehead, hands rubbing your arms. “We want the best for you, Darling. Please.” he then mutters with a much softer tone and glare.

You can only nod. No matter how hard you have worked to achieve your place in one of the most prestigious lawfirms in Seoul, it means nothing to your family if you don’t marry and secure the linage and continuity of the business as the only heir to your parents. The anger in you for the way they speak so tragically of your break up with Jungkook, as if he was the best of all men that you could have chosen to spend your life with, makes you want to go get screwed by the first pretty face that lingers around. Maybe even to be seen at a late hours club dancing your heart out for the paparazzi.

A man interrupts the sweet father-daughter moment and you are introduced to Seokjin, his prince-looking son. You soon recognise the man, who hasn’t introduced himself expecting you to know who he is. He is an associate of your father with his franchise in the city. You automatically see the game your father is playing and more than before, you just want to leave the party and unwind from the whole getting-you-a-husband experience. Unfortunately for you, your father has other plans and engages you into the conversation, making sure to brag about your achievements while making you look humble and modest. ‘When will this torture end’ you think, almost rolling your eyes.

Seokjin seems like someone you could get along with, but unfortunately doing so would make your parents sign up for a wedding and you are simply not up for it. He seems genuinely interested in you by the questions he makes and you try to entertain the conversation with caution not to let your sour humour -that practically exudes from you since your break up- make an act of presence. The sound of the elevator, however, seems to distract you from the conversation at the right moment. Jimin steps out of it and your heart skips a beat.

He walks your way in a black suit that clings to his body like a glove, unusually tight at the waist, differentiating him from the rigid-looking male suits present. As soon as he is in your reach he says, “I think this suits me better, I should thank you for that little accident, Darling.” with his eyes on you and a sweetness to them that doesn’t match the sharp eyeshadow that he’s used. You are speechless but can’t figure out if it’s because of his approach or his beauty. Maybe it’s both. “Do you need me to save you from this conversation?” he mutters, leaning closer and laughing as he stands straight again.

“Jimin-ssi, let me present you, Kim Seokjin,” you say drifting away from the unpolitness that the CEO’s son doesn’t deserve. “I’ll be fine with him, I appreciate it,” you mutter once they have exchanged basic information to become acquaintances. They seem to like each other, genuinely, and somehow that makes you glad.

“All right, I’ll let you two go back to the conversation you were having before I interrupted,” he says with a bright smile. “I’ll go sit at the bar. If you need me, just look my way,” he whispers before bowing to you and Seokjin.

It’s that sudden thought that you don’t really know the man that makes you notice what you just allowed. Thing is, his charms draw you in to wanting to know more than what he has just let out to introduce himself to Seokjin. The prince looks at the angel as he walks away in what you would swear is awe and you can’t avoid to smile; you are not the only one who’s been tempted.

“Have you known him for long?” wonders Seokjin, turning to you after he takes a sip of his flute. “You two seem close,” he points out and a shade of pink paints your cheeks, realising the way Jimin has put his hand between your shoulder blades and he hasn’t made you uncomfortable in the slightest.

“Not long really,” you respond truthfully, then realise how bad that can make you look, “but Jimin has that thing that makes you feel safe around him,” you rush to correct, masking your apprehension good enough. At least for your parents sake, it’s best that you keep appearances.

“I can tell, I feel like I knew him from somewhere,” he says, looking to the side with a slight frown before meeting your eyes again, “but it’s impossible. I would remember someone like him.” His tone lets you know the meaning behind his words, he’s being open about his attraction to Jimin.

“Seokjin…” you hesitate a second. “This might be improper of me to ask but… Are you by any means–”

“Gay?” he interrupts with a smile and you nod with doe eyes waiting for what he’s to say next.

“Between you and I… And this is me guessing that you are of another kind from these people… I’m bisexual.” he admits and you smile at him brightly. “My parents don’t know… Or at least they act like they have no clue about it.”

“To keep the image,” you say before taking a sip. “Oh, sir, do I know things about that?”

“I know,” he interjects, “that’s why I’m speaking freely. I can only guess what this party is truly about and I can only say that I pity you.”

“No interest in me then,” you tease before taking another sip, looking around the room.

“Don’t take me wrong, that’s not what I meant at all,” he says, getting your attention. “I think you are attractive and from what I’ve heard you are smart. No matter how much your father tried to minimise the importance of your career, it hasn’t fooled me. I’ve read articles and you are really good at what you do. Marrying you instead of a frigid posh-princess would be it.” he looks at you above the glass of champagne, seductively. You swallow.

“I didn’t expect that,” you say, clearing your throat. “I mean–”

“My apologies if I was too direct there,” he rushes to do damage control.

“No, no, on the contrary. I much rather someone who is genuine than to be playing the chase.” you rush to reassure. “I just didn’t expect that from any of my father’s colleagues son’s to be honest. Everyone…”

“I know, I would like to–” he stops immediately when his father signals him from across the room pointing to his phone. “If you’ll excuse me?”

“Sure! Don’t worry.”

“It was a pleasure to speak. I hope we can repeat it,” he mentions with a bow.

“I would be glad to,” you reply politely, unsure as to why you just don’t feel attracted to him.

As he walks away, you scan him through, noticing the formalwear wraps perfectly at his well built buttocks. A ‘not bad’ pout draws in your face before the awareness of someone picking on the gesture makes you panic. You scan the room. The only person with eyes on you is Jimin, and he looks away with a laugh, making all the blood in your body rush to your face. You bite your lower lip and chug the rest of your flute down your throat, before turning around, deciding to abandon the party.

The amount of flutes you’ve had during the tormentous situation, escapes your knowledge and although you are normally very careful with getting drunk, it becomes obvious that a slight dizziness is playing a part in your decision. But as you leave the glass object on the near table a voice stops you in your tracks. The room seems to have fallen silent too.

“Ares, may we speak?” the voice resounds in your mind and you feel like you are about to lose your balance and faint, in either order.

You turn around and you must look as drained of blood as you feel because his face expresses surprise and somehow, worry. ‘Escape plan, now’ your mind buzzes and you search across the room, having become disoriented as to where the bar is. Jungkook feels way too close, although you are aware that he is keeping a way more than polite distance. He repeats the question, but you are preoccupied and Jimin is not in his seat. You feel the tears prickle in your eyes and look for your parents instead but all the room has gone back to their conversations and they seem more than pleased to have him talk to you, because they don’t give a second glance in your direction.

In that moment something takes over you, ‘You can do this. Refuse, block, move away.’ “No. We have nothing to say.” You tell him and begin to turn around again, dismissively, but he grabs your forearm whispering for you to listen to him. You turn with a death glare, “Let go of me, Jungkook, or I’ll scream this house down.”

“I doubt you will,” he talks under his breath, confidently. “Besides, it–”

“Dove, sorry for keeping you waiting.” Jimin says from your left flank and Jungkook lets you go at the instant. “Are you sure you left the jacket in your room? I haven’t been able to find it,” he says, keeping his eyes on you before turning slightly to Jungkook. “Oh, sorry, are we not leaving?” he says, returning his eyes to you, looking way more gentle and innocent than you know him for.

“Yes we are, Chimmy. My jacket is at the entrance, sorry, I got distracted,” you let out and cringe internally to how improper it is to you to nickname him when you barely know him. “Excuse us,” you say to Jungkook and bow out of your own proper behaviour, seeing Jimin do the same. You see him astonished from the corner of your eye as Jimin puts his hand at your lower back and walks with you to the entrance.

He asks for your jackets to the buttler and he goes inside the room behind the reception where they keep the larger jackets for those clients who pay an extra for it. Jimin eyes the furry white jacket you are handed and giggles for a reason you don’t understand before helping you in it. Then the soft blue uniformed man passed him another fluffy coat in black, like a raven's wings. You watch as he puts it on and you smile at the coincidence. “May we?” he says, offering his arm.

Outside, he is given the keys of a pretty dark purple Porsche Boxster and then accompanies you to your door and waits for you to sit comfortably before closing the door. Finally starting the car and leaving the premises he speaks, “Chimmy. I think I like it.” The giggle that follows makes you blush.

“So corny, I know. I just couldn’t think of anything better at the moment,” you explained, opening the jacket a little bit as the heater inside the car is working too well. He makes quick use of his hands without taking his eyes off the road; turning off the heater and opening the sunroof of the car while reducing its speed. He looks at you and nods in a muted question, you nod back and lean on the headrest while breathing in the cold air of the night.

You don’t ask where he is taking you at first and just enjoy the fresh air of the autumn night, away from that senseless event, away from the strings of your parents. You are sure, once back, you will hear from them and it’s going to be an uncomfortable conversation, like it all is lately. You are fed up. “You will have to tell me where you want to go or what you want to do. I’m driving aimlessly,” he points out and you open your eyes to look at him.

The wind seems to have a deal with him because it makes his hair go backwards beautifully, only accentuating how handsome he is. “I can’t believe I got in a car with a stranger,” you voice without a thought and he chuckles. “How did you know I needed to get out?” you finally inquire.

“I know who he is and by your face, you know what his business is. It wouldn’t have sat well in my conscience if I had let him charm you to his world,” he says while using the indicator to turn right. You are at a loss of words processing whatever that can mean. “May I suggest we stop here and talk until you decide what you want to do?” he questions.

“Sounds like a good plan, Jimin-ssi.”

He stops at a viewpoint towards the city and you soak on the spectacle of little lights it displays. It never gets old. The feeling of being much more tinier than you think makes you smile. You can’t help but notice his eyes are on you and not the view for some time. The light pollution has the sky coated and you can’t see the stars but you know they are there. You let out a sigh.

“How do you know who he is?” you inquire moving in your seat to face him.

“I’m surprised you don’t.”

“I do. He’s my ex, but what about you? This is not something he goes around screaming,” you concede not up for a cat and mouse chase.

“Let’s say I’ve seen what his organisation is capable of and that I would very much like to see him between bars.” he lets out with what you can guess is a sort of grunt of resentment. “What he does is so wrong… It should end. How did you date him?” he wonders, leaning at an angle between his seat and the door. “Didn’t your parents investigate him?”

“I’m not even sure they know… I obviously can’t say a word because these people are dangerous, but he wasn’t even in when we started dating,” you explain and he looks at you attentively. “God… I barely know you, what are we even doing talking about this. I don’t-” You panic a little, aware that this could be one of those tricks the organisation plays to prove loyalties. That talking too much could put everyone you know in danger. The most concerning part is how has he come across them and saw anything if he is not related to the criminal work himself or partnered with someone inside. He surely acts like he is single and these people don’t let you roam around with just anyone from the other gender that belongs in.

“I understand,” he says with a gentle smile that makes his eyes turn into tiny moons.

“Are you from the Intelligence Service?” you finally have the courage to ask.

“Oh, no, Darling. I just happen to have crossed paths with the wrong people. Just like you did,” he points out. “At least I got something nice out of it,” he says, extracting a white gold chain full of swarovski crystals.

“No jokes,” you say, appreciating the piece. “I feel a little bit less pathetic now that you showed me this.” you point out and he raises an eyebrow questioning. Reaching inside the neck of your dress you extract a white gold necklace with a three carat, rose diamond in pearl cut, with a matching sapphire next to it. “Diamonds are forever, even if relationships are not.”

“Beautiful!” he says looking at it with interest. “May I?” he refers to touch it and you politely agree. “It’s magnificent. I wish I had a better light to view it,” he mutters letting it go.

“It’s flawless. He made sure of it,” you say and the memory of the day he gifted it to you comes back rushing with all the emotions you felt.

He was at the peak of his career, or so it seemed, because you would have never guessed where he got the money to buy the expensive piece. You were celebrating the numbers reached at the end of the year from the face business that kept all that was happening in the background hidden and he pulled you aside into his home office.

“I have something for you,” he said, whispering in your ear. “Close your eyes.”

He put the piece gently on you, careful with the baby hairs sticking out of your formal bun. You opened your eyes at the feeling of the weight of it and looked at the piece astonished. Even if jewellery wasn’t your forte or something you paid too much attention to, aside from it being an accessory, you did understand what you were wearing.

“Oh my god, Jungkook. You didn’t have to, this must have cost a fortune!” you said, feeling overwhelmed by wearing something of the calibre that wasn’t gifted by your parents.

“It’s just a token for your constant support. It represents us together,” he said, kissing your cheek before embracing you and making your lips melt together. You could still feel the taste of his bourbon stained tongue and how warm he made you feel. He reached for your left hand and put it up in the air, to the side, making you tilt your head to look as he did too. “Soon I’ll put a matching ring on this finger. I just have to find the perfect diamond for it.”

His words didn’t shock you as much as the casualty in which he said it, as if knowing it for certain. “I think my parents will be glad that we stop living in sin,” you said with a giggle.

“Wouldn’t you?” his tone, although calm, couldn’t hide the slight hurt.

“I would. We’ve talked about it,” you said, placing both hands at his chest, meeting his eyes in a plea. “I love you, gukkie.” The nickname made him smile immediately. Not the attractive smile he dedicated to everyone around, the one that had everyone wrapped around his little finger. No. The one that made him look like an innocent bunny, the one that reminded you of the first time he stole your breath. The one that reminded you of the time you fell in love with him. Four years ago.

“I love you too, my rose.”

“I shouldn’t have brought up the subject,” he mutters and hands you his handkerchief before looking away, you realise a couple of tears are falling down your cheeks and rush to dry them with the item offered then you keep it between your fingers over your lap for a second.

“It’s not sadness, I don’t miss him. I just… I feel hurt because I was lied to,” you partially lie.

“I wish I didn’t understand the feeling,” he says, touching his lips with his elbow over the downed window at his side. “But let’s not talk about that,” he suggests. “I know only a few overheard things from you at the party, I would like to know which ones are true,” he says, positioning himself to look at you again.

“Damn, I hope it was all good.” The smile on your face is sincere. There’s something in him that simply seems to soothe you.

“You are a lawyer and just won one of the most important cases in South Korea,” he points out and you feel flustered.

“They exaggerate, I’m not the best. I also have a great team with me.”

“Don’t undermine your value, Diamond,” he says, raising your chin for you to look at him the same way you looked at the crowded room when you entered the party. “The world needs more people like you.”

You don’t know what takes over you but your digits rest gently against his thumb and the next thing you know, you are both leaning for a kiss. His lips curve in a smirk the moment your lips touch and he presses them inviting you to part yours. The kiss goes slow as you both drink from the nectars of your mouths and you feel like you are tasting the clouds.

Not in a million years would you have guessed that you would sneak through the back door of the hotel when a worker finished smoking and went inside. Neither would you kiss at every stop of the stairs until reaching his room. For sure, never, that you would be making out with the stranger in his bed like a couple of horny teenagers.

He chuckles against your throat in response to a giggle when he grabs your ass, just like it happened when you were reaching his room floor. He nibbles and bites softly with an open mouth, his front teeth making goosebumps flourish all over your skin while your hands entwine over the bed. He lets his slide down over your arms until reaching your sides, sliding down to grasp your ass in handfuls and you gasp. He raises his upper body before using his shaft against your covered core, eyes hooded with desire, parted lips exposing the shallowness of his breath.

You take grasp of his black hair at the scalp, softly sliding your fingers as you move up to find his throat and imitate what he has so expertly done to you. He grunts and has to remove his hands from your flesh to take hold of his own weight as you work.

He stands on his knees and you raise up using the moment you start undoing his shirt. His hand slides behind your back to undo the zipper of your dress. His chiselled chest displays right in front of your face as you get rid of the last button and you press a kiss on his ribs, where a ‘nevermind’ tattoo displays. He takes his shirt off from his arms and pulls your straps down your shoulders, letting him see your bra.

He traces the extra lace at the upper part of your breasts where the thicker fabric covering them comes to an end, but the translucent silver looking material continues an inch. Your skin reacts to it and it sends a shiver down your spine.

He slides his fingers up your sternum, where the two gems rest and he pulls his hand away. Unclasping his own necklace, he puts it on the bedside table, "Let's forget about them."

You nod and reach to your nape to unclasp your necklace. Taking it off you see the shine of both stones against the dim light of the room and you leave it next to his chain.

Immediately his lips find your throat and his arms surround your waist to lean you on the bed. Getting comfortable between your legs. The cold of the metallic buckle makes you gasp for a moment and instinctively reach to separate it from your skin.

He makes a little space to see what's going on, concerned, then realises no harm has been done and sits on his legs, unbuckling it. He starts pulling off the trousers down his thighs but you put a hand on his and move to stand, gesturing for him to do the same.

When he obeys, you pull them down to his ankles, lowering to your knees and he meets your eyes when you look up. His crotch, in grey boxers, is right in front of you but he doesn’t look proud or greedy for having you in that position. He only seems to wait and your eyes fall on his bulge.

Your dominant hand follows and you outline the shape of him, making his breath hitch when you trace the tip. The fact that he's still a stranger becomes your safe place. No need to worry about being judged because even if he does, you don't need to see him tomorrow. Something, maybe that thought itself, gives you the strength to unleash.

You approach your face to his area and nibble on the middle of the girth. This time he hisses letting his head fall backwards and you pull the fabric covering him to his knees, looking at the perfection of his member. Hard and straight it springs out touching your nose. His eyes lock on yours again when you grab him and press the tip of your tongue at the juncture of his head.

He squints his eyes and hisses once again, opening them, when you take it in your mouth. You play around it with your tongue, circling it, sucking softly, and his hand meets your nape, holding your hair but not inducing anything.

The moment you start bobbing your head he grunts and you feel his precum spill over your tongue. "Damn…" he says using his grip to get away from your mouth and holds his shaft with one hand. "Stand, Diamond."

He lets go of himself when you obey and grabbing you by the waist he makes you sit at the edge of the tall bed and falls on his knees in front of you. He gently discards your silver laced panties and grabs your legs to put them on his shoulders as he leans forward kissing the insides of your thighs.

It's the first time you do this with anyone who isn't Jungkook and it just feels oddly cool to feel this man's tongue gently rub your knob. He works slowly, exploring, trying, and teasing until you are gasping at the verge of an orgasm. Then, his rhythm changes and seems to undo and redo his traces.

You almost cry his name, unravelling in his mouth as he doesn't let go of your legs and keeps it going while you are at your peak. The aggressiveness in which he keeps licking makes you try to pull away but his grip becomes almost bruising and he nibbles a bit hard on your left thigh. "Let me do it again…" he mutters, looking at the spot before looking at your pleading eyes. "You taste so good…"

His words send a wave of pleasure through you that you let out in a moan as you nod. He returns to it with closed eyes, focused, and moans the moment you arch your back again for him.

He lets you find a spot in the bed to rest when he stands wiping precum from his tip before reaching for a napkin to clean it from his thumb. He leans forward to kiss you; his lips meet yours lightly, playing with the intensity until he pulls away and you involuntarily try to follow him with your mouth.

He opens the drawer of his nightstand and pulls out a condom, opening it with ease. "Wanna keep it going?" he questions right before he starts slipping it on. You nod, feeling your body radiate heat to the thought of feeling him inside of you.

He makes sure you are comfortable over the bed and allows his lips to fall on your neck trailing little nibbles as he mumbles how much he wants you. He seems in a trance, just as much as you are and when he aligns with you, you use your heels to encourage him pushing further in. He grabs at the back of one of the thighs to stop you and spanks slightly the other while hissing for you to stop. To your complaint, he lets go and obeys making both of you gasp when he fills you to the hilt.

His hips snap on yours almost immediately and the hard grip stays on your thigh, as your nails start digging on his back. "Stop that, damn it…" he says and you chuckle in response, before he pulls out. He then puts you on all fours and plunges in making you moan and whine the moment he starts fucking you relentless with a hand at your nape. You grip at the sheets as if you were going to shred them before he angles better, making you let your forehead over the bed as he keeps it going. At the moment you feel you are peaking you close the grip of your walls, comming undone with the friction and spills with a growl almost immediately. "F-fuuck…"

Both spent, he whispers for you to sleep with him and make use of his room as much you need.

Soon the drowsiness of exhaustion drifts you to slumber and he, who seemed to be just as tired, opens his eyes when your breath turns even. You don't notice him standing slowly, pacing the room completely naked with the calm of owning it and reaching to the nightstand for your necklace.

He walks to the bathroom and takes a bag from underneath the sink. He places the jewel over a scale and then over a paper, taking a picture of the piece with a smartphone also from the bag. He types the characteristics and sends it all to the receiver before putting everything away. He goes out of the bathroom and makes sure to place the piece like nothing happened.

His phone buzzes on the nightstand; unknown number.

"Folder created. Ready to receive," says a male voice at the other side of the phone.

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I hope you enjoyed this. Let me know your thoughts and reblog to let it spread 😊 See you soon! ~

#bts smut #bts au fic #bts angst #jimin x reader #jimin x oc #jimin au #jimin mafia #jungkook mafia au #spotify #Jimin mafia au #pjm smut #jimin smut #Spotify

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slutfor-fictionalmen · 4 years ago

Text

¥ Pretty boy ¥

Rich! Izuku midoriya x F! Plus size! reader

Hi everyone!!! this is part of @bakugohoex‘s Collab, you should check the rest of the collab and her works out!!! enjoy!!

Izuku comes from a rich family, owns lavish cars and houses upon houses but all he really wants is you. You come from a humble background, refusing wealth but dealing when izuku wants to spoil you. Izu can literally fuck you anywhere because he is that rich; Nsfw, Fluff, public sex(kinda), smut(kinda? dom izu), reader is kinda a cheapskate.

Sorry it’s so bad; I may continue/ revise based on how this is taken!

“Oh, come on, Y/n! It’ll be so fun, I promise! it’s just one trip; you won’t feel like you did last time!” Memories of the past trip flash through the shapely woman's mind: paparazzi, lavish hotels(yes hotels, he wanted a different view every night), thousand dollar meals, designer boutiques, everything that you had avoided in your life as a pro hero was ironical, as it was all tackled at once.

You loved your boyfriend, and you admire his willingness to give, but this was the main reason you gave a lot of your earnings to health organizations and hotlines, you didn’t feel you needed the money, you were doing just fine without it, eating at home, carpooling to save on gas, helping out at your apartment to get a bit taken off of your rent. But Izuku was born into a life of wealth. Heir to the Yagi fortune, but despite his wealth, you wouldn’t know he was wealthy by simply meeting him.

“Oh, don’t patronize me izuku, you know I would hate that trip, I always hate overly expensive trips, I could get the same trip through my booking sites for half the price, and you know that!” You huff leaning over to fold your laundry. Izuku walks behind you, placing his large hands on your hips and leaning his head on your shoulder. You could feel his pleading look without even looking at him.

“Indulge me, baby. I promise I won’t make it too expensive,” You felt him kiss at your neck, making you sigh until he let out the final part of his argument, a simple,” Please?” You took his hands off your hips and walked away. Izuku sat defeated until he heard you rustle around, cursing as you made a mess of your once clean closet, and came back into the room with a defeated look and a suitcase. “How long are we going for?” Izuku smiled widely and spun you around, his eyes full of love.

----------------time skip to the day of the plans----------------

You gave yourself one last look in the mirror before sighing, regretting agreeing to this trip as you fix your sundress, admiring how the fabric hugs your soft curves perfectly. You knew this vacation would be perfect, that you would love it, but your stubborn mind wanted to fight the potential enjoyment.

Your mouth turned bitter as you internally fought with yourself, going from a fight of stubbornness to a battle against your self-confidence. Your mind picked on everything that wasn’t on your mind before as a deflect of being questioned. Your unpleasant thoughts were interrupted by a certain green-haired man as he walked into the room, stunned at how beautiful you looked in that dress. Distracted by the unmistakable twinkle in his eyes, your thoughts soon disappeared and were replaced with wonder.

“What’re you looking at?” He shook himself out of his trance to approach you with a smile. “Just looking at my beautiful baby girl in that dress, she so horribly fought me on. You look gorgeous, by the way.” His rough hands were felt through the sheer material of the outfit as his thumbs rubbed gentle circles on your wide hips.

You smiled softly and kissed his cheek, looking into his eyes. “Are you ready to go? Cause one more minute, and I may just back out of this.” His eyes go wide as he pulls away and rushes to get everything in the car. Your chuckles are short-lived as he soon comes back and picks you up. “You’re the last thing I need so we can go” you squeak as you remember this man can lift nearly 300 pounds. Why shouldn’t he lift you? Still, every time he lifts you, it comes as a surprise.

He quickly sets you into the car, alarming you with the fact that the driver isn’t any driver at all, it’s one of his close friends, todoroki, and this isn’t even your car; it’s his. “I figured we didn’t need to use the driver and waste money on parking, todo’s gonna drop us off, and I’ll have the driver pick us up after!” Your eyes watered, you knew that the rest of the trip would be extravagant but it was these little things that made you fall in love with him, over and over again. You sat with your hand in his all the way to the airport. You were excited to see new places but dreading the paparazzi.

You stood out of the car, taking in the cool breeze and walking around the car to get to the bags in the back. You bring both of your bags out, along with your carry-ons, and wait for him to finish his conversation with his friend to come to collect his bags. You hear izuku bid him farewell and thank him for the ride before he slips a 20 for gas in his friend’s car and walks to you. “Now don’t be mad...” His eyes shift when he bows his head, preparing to be lectured,” I got first class, and I know you don’t-” You laughed, only calming to rub his shoulder with a smile. “It’s ok! I’ll let it pass.... for now. Now, let’s get our free drink on!”

You’re the first to board, ignoring the dirty looks from the other passengers; you made a vow to enjoy this time.... for izuku’s sake. Your smile didn’t falter, even when the check-in lady gave you a surprising look when you gave her the ticket. You walked onto the plane with confidence; izuku could only say that you looked as if you were born for this… that you belonged here. Your Seats were opened to each other, making a two-bedroom cabin area.

You let izuku walk past you to put your bags to the side and look at the menu. One thing you could never understand is his appetite, he eats more than a group of teenage boys, and he still keeps fit, even if he doesn’t work out. You never found that fair. You shook your head out of the thoughts and sat next to him, searching the tv for a decent channel. You shut off the tv when you saw the news about a new villain, suddenly stressing about the city and what’ll happen if you leave. Your mind flooded with thoughts of the places you love on fire, the people you loved killed and showed as a warning to all the other heroes.

Luckily Deku, who had just finished ordering pretty much the whole menu, sensed your sudden situation and reached over you, pulling the leaver to set your seat back. The sudden movement knocked you out of your daze, causing you to look at the man perched above you with a frustrated look on his face. “You have just been a whirlwind of emotions today, haven’t you? You refuse to calm down; the city will be fine, it’s only a week, and we’re not even going that far!” “but-” “No buts! You don’t want to make me sad, do you?” You sigh, realizing that it was highly improbable for that to happen while you were gone, but that didn’t stop you from worrying. Despite that, you sucked it up, deciding that you might as well enjoy these trips before something happens, after all hero business is very dangerous.

“No Izuku, i don’t” He tilts your chin in order for your eyes to reach his. “Izuku? Really? You know that’s not what i want to hear princess.” You suddenly realize the shift of atmosphere, Izuku’s eyes darkened. “No daddy.” “Good girl.”

He lets his hand drag to the bottom of your dress, pushing up the tinted fabric as he moves his hand to rest on your thigh. Your thighs clench unintentionally when he reaches for the top of your underwear, flinching when he snaps the fabric back onto your skin.

You weren’t used to your soft lover taking the lead, you were the one who took control. You usually calmed your own nerves, with him of course. But you couldn’t think, you couldn't take control, you just had to let him help you, clear your mind and calm you.

You couldn’t help but shiver at the look in his eyes when he’s in control. His eyes darkening,a small glimmer in his eyes is still present but he looks….. Animalistic. You slide your underwear off of your plush form, confidently as he watches you with a ever-growing tent in his pants.

Izuku reached out to your body, holding your soft hip as he moves to slide his form between your thighs. “I don’t think i can be patient much longer beautiful, i may just fuck you like this.” He cups your cheek and uses his thumb to play with your lip, testing how far he can go before sticking his finger in your mouth. You obediently suck on it, watching him bite his lip and shift away to get undressed. “Who says i don’t want you to?”

He quickly takes off his shirt, his scars and freckles littering his tan skin. Izuku's pants are soon to follow allowing his cock to tap his stomach. You always loved how easy it was to get him to get hard, he was always ready for you to fuck him, ready to make love at the mere thought of your full, soft form.

You heard izuku whisper a quick ‘fuck it’ before he grabbed your thighs, wrapping them around his hips and grinding softly onto your soft cunt. Your soft moans fueled the burning fire of his. He grabbed his shaft, lining himself up with your weeping hole. He kissed you deeply before pushing into you, his lips muffling your sweet moans.

His cock throbs as he patiently waits for you to adjust to his girth. Your hips ache, already feeling the pressure of your current activities take it’s toll on your body. Your minds begins to flood with need, processing just how close izuku is, how his muscles feel under your finger tips, how he reacts when you experiment with tightening your smooth walls around him. He waits for you to move, slightly wiggling your hips, before he gives into the feeling, whimpering and keeping a steady pace.

You feel his tip brush against your sweet spot with every thrust, unraveling quicker then you would have liked. Izuku’s blush reaches onto his chest as you moan into his ear, teasing him. He speeds up, ramming into your sweet spot, causing that knot in your stomach to tighten before he shifts to rub at your clit sloppily, letting out lewd noises and tipping you over the edge. Your body freezes, a shaking gasp falling from your lips as you arch your back and your walls flutter and tighten around izuku’s dick. He’s soon to follow, spilling his load over your soft stomach before slowly pulling out and flopping onto his bed besides you.

“That’s one great way to start a shitty trip.” You laugh looking over into his forest eyes. Izuku grabs your hand, kissing your palm and giving you a small smile. “Or just a wonderful way to start a potentially amazing trip. You promised you’d let me spoil you this time, so let me use my money to give you comfort. Ok?” You nod, adjusting your seat to be upright again, and lean over to the champagne. The view out the window is something of beauty as the clouds fold into each other and the sky casts a pink, soft hue onto the white canvas.

Izuku grabs himself a glass, leaning his seat all the way back and putting a complementary eye mask on.

“And besides, the more money we pay, the less people will care where we fuck each other.” He was born into this life, born for it. He was used to this and could be for the rest of his full life.

But izuku would do anything just to be by your side. That’s one thing he can’t pay for.

#izuku midoriya x reader #plus size reader #izuku midoriya x plus size reader #plus size!reader #izuku midoriya #mha x reader #mha x chubby reader #bnha imagines #smut #fluff

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samwilsonshandsandass · 4 years ago

Text

Don’t decline too many times

Pairing: soft!dark!Steve Rogers x reader

Summary: The local gang leader is always nice to you. But is there an ulterior motive behind it all for his niceness?

Warnings: Alcohol consumption (voluntarily), asks about pregnancy, abduction

Word count: about 3000

A/N: This is my entry for @stargazingfangirl18 Siri’s 5K Soft Dark Challenge. A big congrats on your milestone and thank you for hosting this challenge, I enjoyed writing for it! I chose general prompt number 5 (“The leader of the local gang doesn’t like it when you tell them no.”) for this. The dividers are made by the awesome @firefly-graphics

You sat at the bar, a small bowl with olives and peanuts in front of you. You had asked for a caipirinha and shortly after if the bartender, a female redhead, could get you some snacks. She said she could, but she also cautiously probed if you were pregnant. No, you weren’t.

“Well then, I can offer you olives and peanuts.”

You nodded, and now the quite unusual combination of a fruity and sweet drink and olives and peanuts found a home in you. You had your elbows propped up on the bar, back straight and eyes on the bar top. The bowls with the snacks were gone quicker than the drink and the bartender kept both coming. Eating way quicker than drinking helped with that, apparently.

You didn’t know what number drink you were on when you were approached the first time that evening. Although night would be a better term.

“Miss? I- uh- I’d wanted to ask-“ The guy who now sat on the stool next to you stumbled over his words, but not because of alcohol in his system. He didn’t slur, he talked normally.

You saw a tattooed hand clasp the guys’ shoulder. “I don’t think you’re in the right place, buddy. Leave the lady alone.”

“Why would I-“ The guy turned to look at whoever had his hand on his shoulder. “Oh! I’m so sorry, Mr.-“

“Yeah, yeah, I imagine you are. But you’ll be even more sorry if you don’t move now” The other growled and the guy got up so quickly, he almost face planted away from the bar.

“Uhm, thank you? You know, you didn’t have to, he wasn’t bothering me. I could’ve dealt with him” You said to the brown-haired man.

“I know. But this isn’t what this is about.”

“Then what is ‘this’ about?” You were a little irritated.

“You’ll see. Enjoy your night, miss” He gave a small salute and went back into the crowd. You tried looking where he went but quickly lost him, although the bar wasn’t as packed as it could be.

Steve looked over the bar patrons from the mezzanine level of the bar, that housed his private booth that could be seen, and was supposed to be seen, from below but no one ever found the staircase until they were explicitly shown where it was.

His night was going nice, no big problems in the last days, the bar was filled and his new favorite person had just walked in. Alone. She made a beeline for the bar and after a short conversation, got what she wanted from Natasha. She didn’t move much throughout the night and he was happy to just watch her.

Steve sipped on his own drink. He wondered what she drank. He’d have to ask Natasha for that. He took another sip and swallowed harshly. Someone sat next to what would be his. Normally, he’d be lenient with that, especially if the bar was packed almost too full but for one thing, it wasn’t. Secondly, you didn’t seem to want any company tonight. Just to be left alone and drink.

“Buck?” Steve looked up.

“On it.”

A few days later, you were out grocery shopping after work. It had been a long day, full of demands you couldn’t meet or weren’t even supposed to fulfill because they didn’t fall into your department. And right as you could finally leave for the day, your boyfriend Chad had called to let you know he came home to an empty fridge and if you couldn’t pick up some fresh vegetables. But only from that one organic store. And only the freshest produce of the freshest.

How were you supposed to get literal farm-to-table produce when the delivery truck for that particular store only came twice a week and only ever in the morning? You asked and just got an exasperated sigh from Chad. So here you were, paying for the groceries and leaving the store.

You stepped out of the store and almost collided with someone. The person just kept on walking, apparently not even noticing how you wobbled and the bags in your hands almost slipped out of your grasp. Just as you thought everything would tumble and you’d have wasted that money, you felt hands on your elbows, steadying you.

“I got you, don’t worry.”

You didn’t recognize the voice. You turned around and did a double take. You looked up at Steve Rogers, the leader of the city’s gang, just known as “The Commando”.

“Th- thank you. It wouldn’t have been good if I had spilled all this.”

“What would you have spilled?”

“Fresh vegetables for tonight’s dinner.”

“All that just for you?” Steve seemed genuinely curious and confused.

“Oh no. For me and my boyfriend, Chad.”

Steve took the bags from your hands without asking. “Mind if I walk you home? It’s late and these bags look really heavy and that’s not even touching your normal bag.”

“I couldn’t ask you to do that.”

“You’re not, I’m offering.”

“Thank you, but it’s not far, it really isn’t necessary” You declined.

“Alright, well have a nice evening, miss” Steve raised his fingertips to his non-existent hat.

“You too, thanks.”

Several weeks later, you laid on the couch with Chad with some mindless trash tv show playing in the background. He had his arm around you. You looked at him. He didn’t look back at you, but maybe he was just captivated by watching something that didn’t require much thinking after a long work day. Well, you wanted to do something that also didn’t require much thinking. You started kissing up and down his neck until he turned his head.

“What are you doing Y/N?”

“What does it look like?” You grinned.

“I’m too tired right now. Tomorrow?” Chad groaned.

You removed yourself from him and sat up again. “You’ve said that for weeks now! I also have needs and I don’t want to use my vibrator all the time. I want you.”

“Well, I can’t change how tired I am!” He raised his voice, despite or because of his tiredness, you didn’t know.

Shortly after, you went to bed. Unsatisfied and feeling like you had been shunned.

Just a few days later, you were frantically searching for a clean and decent shirt you could wear to work. You really couldn’t show up to work in a graphic tee shirt.

“Chad, where are my clean shirts?” You yelled through the appartement.

“In your wardrobe?! Like always?” He yelled back.

“No, they aren’t! Didn’t you do the laundry?”

“No, why would I?”

“Because it was your turn!”

“Well, I forgot. I’m sorry, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, always sorry” You grumbled so he couldn’t hear and pulled a unicolor long sleeve shirt from the wardrobe. That would have to do.

It was a Saturday and you were in the mall, trying on clothes, maybe you’d buy some shoes. You wanted to treat yourself. Chad was gone for the weekend and you’d had a stressful week at work. You had found so many things you were packed with two or three bags in each hand plus your handbag over your shoulder. This had been an extensive haul and you couldn’t be more happy about your new treasures.

You carried several bags to the entrance to then get on home when you saw the revolving door wasn’t working. You groaned. Awesome. When you entered the mall, they had still worked and of course, today had to be the time you also bought something voluminous that you couldn’t just transfer from one hand to the other to open the door that was still working. While you thought about setting half the bags down and just walking twice or holding the door open with your foot, someone from behind you reached around you and opened it for you.

“Oh. Thank you!” You turned around and saw a familiar face. Steve Rogers.

“You’re welcome.”

He tipped his imaginary hat when you and all your bags were through the door. You turned and could see him still hold open the door with an older lady thanking the “Young man” and walking off.

“Do you want me to walk you to your car?” He offered.

“No, thanks I got it from here.”

Steve tipped his “hat” again and said his goodbye when you went in the direction of the parking lot.

You had reservations at a nice Mexican restaurant with Chad for this Friday evening. There was nothing to celebrate, you had just agreed to go out again, because you could. You were excited for it, an evening with good food, talking, no needing to take care of anything except getting home and a nice evening and then a lazy weekend until the work week started again. Now it was Thursday.

“Chad? Friday is still happening?” You sat at the breakfast table and Chad poured himself a coffee.

“Yeah. Work shouldn’t keep me longer than expected.”

“Alright, we’ll just meet at the restaurant, then.”

Friday came, work went down without any incident and you went straight to the restaurant. Granted, you were a little early, but you’d rather be early than late, which would have been the case if you had gone home beforehand.

“Excuse me? I have a reservation for Y/L/N, for two people. I know I’m a little early, but I thought maybe…” You trailed off.

“My colleague will show you to your table, you can already take a seat and wait for your company. I’ll send them over once they arrive” The receptionist said.

“Thank you” You smiled and followed her colleague.

At the table, you texted your boyfriend. Just a simple “I’m here a little early.” After the waiter brought a water, your phone still didn’t ping with a text. Twenty minutes later, you sent a second text. “Hey, you coming? Our reservation is for this time.” Now would’ve been the time your table was reserved for. No answer. 15 minutes and another text later, there still was no answer.

“Miss, do you want to order an appetizer or wait for your company?”

“I’ll wait for him, if that’s okay.”

“Yes, of course.”

Thirty minutes, another text and another visit from your waiter later, there still was no sign of Chad. Just as you felt tears of rage pricking your eyes, your waiter set a dish of panna cotta with fruits on the side in front of you.

“On the house.”

You smiled gratefully. At least panna cotta would soothe some of the rage you felt.

At home, there was no sign of Chad. You went to bed alone, feeling a storm of different emotions ranging from anger to sadness.

You woke to clanging in the hallway. It sounded like a person stumbling, trying to get back up and failing. That could only be Chad. Especially at this hour. You remembered once, pretty early on in your relationship how he had stumbled in just like this after a night out with his boys when you didn’t want to come with. You had helped him sober up and then you both had spent a nice day in with Chad nursing his hangover.

But this was different. This was your boyfriend, first blatantly ignoring or forgetting your date night (you didn’t know which would be worse), no matter if it went along with a special date or not, and now he didn’t even hide what he had been doing instead.

“Hey babe? Can you- can you help me?” He slurred.

And in that moment, you snapped. Still sitting in bed. You couldn’t do this anymore.

In the hallway, you saw Chad entangled in your and his winter coat. However he managed that.

“No. No, I will not do that” You crossed your arms and looked down at him. “I’m done. This is the last straw.”

“What happened babe?” The confusion was evident on Chad’s face but you couldn’t see if it was from the hangover or just general confusion. And either way, you didn’t care.

“Several things. Over quite some time. But this, this takes the cake. We had a date. We wanted to meet after work at this restaurant we’ve talked about. And you didn’t show up! You didn’t answer any of my texts! It got so bad, the staff there gave me a free dessert! It was humiliating! And don’t you dare tell me you lost your phone; you’re glued to it!” You shook from your anger.

“But you got free dessert!”

How could anyone miss the point so badly? You wondered.

“Go. Go and only come back to get your stuff. Otherwise, just leave me alone.”

You threw on clothes quickly, grabbed your keys, bag and purse and left. Down on the street, you just started to wander around aimlessly. You ducked into a bakery for a to-go breakfast and coffee, you went to the park, to a hole in the wall pizza joint for lunch, just meandering through the city.

Now it was evening. You looked up to actually see where you were and were surprised to see you had walked all the way from the park you had been in during the afternoon to the bar of the city��s main gang.

You remembered all kinds of rumors and stories about the gang, sometimes just about one or two members, even if the story didn’t tie directly in with the gang. But no matter the stories or rumors, they all boiled down to “They’re dangerous, stay away from them and their localities!”.

But the first time you had been in the bar, everything was nice, it had seemed cozy and like you were welcomed even if no one knew you. Hell, the bar lady had asked you if you were pregnant, like she wanted to protect you! And Steve, the actual leader of the gang, had been nothing but nice to you. Offering to help you and still not inserting himself forcefully into situations when you said no.

You entered and looked around. For a bar, it was pretty early and you only saw a few patrons. You went to take a seat at the bar again and greeted the red head with a smile. She smiled back and continued cleaning the glasses. A while later, she got to you.

“Caipirinha, olives and peanuts again? Still not pregnant?”

“Yes and no. And how do you remember what I ordered? That was weeks ago!”

“I’m a barkeeper. Simple as that” She smiled.

“Uh, could you keep them coming? At least for a while?”

“Something happened?”

“I broke up with my boyfriend today. Then wandered around and now I’m here” You shrugged.

“Alright. But I reserve the right to cut you off when I think you had enough.”

“Okay. But you won’t cut off the olives and peanuts?”

She laughed, throwing her head back. “Yes, I’ll keep giving you food.”

You smiled for the first time today. “Deal.”

The rest of the evening went by in a more or less haze of snacks, alcohol and the mix of hurt at your ended relationship but also the rage when you thought of what kind of behaviors of Chad made you end it all.

The barkeeper didn’t cut you off, which probably was related to you basically inhaling olives and peanuts. Hours later, you paid, slipped the redhead a big tip and a big smile and made to get home.

Almost right at the exit, you were stopped when you felt a hand on your elbow. You turned your head to tell whoever touched you off, but slight confusion furrowed your brows. Wasn’t that the guy from when you had been here weeks ago who kept that other guy from (probably) asking you out?

“Can I help you?” You asked.

“Actually, you can. Indirectly at least.”

“What?”

“I’m here to ask you if you’d like to come with me to up there” He nodded his head to the mezzanine level. “to meet someone.” He emphasized the ‘someone’ in a way that made it clear that ‘someone’ was special. In one way or another.

“Why would I?”

“To experience something, you wouldn’t otherwise.”

“No, thank you” You weren’t in the mood for something new. You wanted to mourn and rage at what you left behind and burrow yourself under blankets with pints of ice cream at home.

“Alright. Have a good evening, miss” He tipped his head and went off into the direction of, supposedly, the stairs to the mezzanine level.

You went home. You were surprised to see Chad had actually gotten his stuff out of your appartement. At least one pleasant thing had come out of the morning, in a twisted way. In the living room, you did exactly what you wanted to do. Eating all the ice cream you had in the freezer and basically becoming a blanket burrito.

When you woke, you felt blankets around you and a softly pulsing headache behind your forehead. You opened your eyes and blinked. And blinked. You turned your head. And blinked again. Slowly realization trickled in. Something wasn’t right. You weren’t where you were when you’d went to sleep.

Whatever you laid on was soft and big. You could turn your whole body and roll around. You could move and you could orientate yourself in your body. You looked down and saw you were still in the clothes you had worn to the bar. Right, you didn’t put on pajamas before going to sleep.

Just as you sat up on the bed, you heard a door open. You turned your head and couldn’t believe your eyes.

“Steve?!”

“Just the one.”

“Why?”

“I just want to take care of you. Is that so hard to understand?”

#my things #my writing #siris5ksoftdarkchallenge #dark!steve rogers x you #dark!steve rogers x reader #dark!steve rogers x y/n #dark!steve rogers x reader insert #dark!steve rogers #dark!marvel fanfiction #fanfiction

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sylvie-writes · 4 years ago

Text

So Confused

word count: 1433

pairing: dad!steve rogers x wife!reader x sarah rogers

summary: steve and sarah get you a gift yet your husband is a bit confused as to what it is.

a/n: this is a birthday gift to myself hehe. i meant to get this out earlier but life happened lol.

please excuse mistakes this was written on mobile. the writing is very straight forward because i am tireddd.

For days on end Steve had been on mission. Not one for the Avengers, but rather for personal reasons per se. He was on the hunt for the perfect birthday gift for you. In the past he had always had no trouble but that was during the honeymoon phase and felt it was about time to step up his game, ever since your daughter had been born, that is. This year he has absolutely no clue what to get, but luckily he could enlist the help of his mini me who had the perfect gift in mind.

The two of them had snuck out this morning while you were still sleeping. Unfortunately they had to wait until the day of your birthday to get your gift because in the past you’ve had a knack for unintentionally finding the hidden presents.

“Are you sure this is it, little doll?” Steve and Sarah were standing in the middle of the home appliance store looking thoroughly confused by a cardboard box. The man’s hands were on his hips while his daughter mimicked the action.

“I’m sure, Daddy!” Sarah went to go wrap her arms around the large box since it was at her level, but it was heavier than she had intended it to be and instead looked up to her dad for help. He easily scooped it up as if it were a piece of paper.

“Well, if you are sure this is it, what is it for?” In one hand Steve held the white and green cardboard box and rested it against his waist while the other hand held Sarah’s hand to keep her close. As they walked to the checkout line, Steve’s eyes scanned over the big bold letters on the box that read “Roomba.”

“Silly Daddy! It’s a rowbot vacooooom.” The smaller blonde giggled at her dad’s confused face and he moved his gaze to look down at her with a goofy smile.

“Next!” The cashier called them next in line and Sarah broke away from her dad to run up to the lady and greeted her while Steve followed suit.

Mumbling under his breath he picked up his pace, “Wow, times really are changing.”

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMY!” Two lovely voices awoke you and a little girl jumped on the bed to snuggle up as a larger man sat beside you on the edge.

You greeted them both in return with a kiss to their cheeks before Sarah was readily sitting criss cross in your lap. Her tiny hand gave you a white envelope that had been colored in almost every color crayon you can imagine. In the child’s best handwriting, written in squiggly letters was your name along with a disproportionate heart that made you giggle. It was the kind of artwork that a parent valued because it was their child’s and not since it looked like Davinci’s art, heavens knew it was anything but that.

Opening the card made your heart melt as you read the wording in the card, ones in Steve’s expert cursive but Sarah’s own words. Steve’s handwriting was so elegant and old fashioned. You loved when he wrote anything for you, whether that be a note telling the dishes were clean or a letter he sent when off for work.

A tiny tear pricked at the corner of your eye for Sarah’s letter was so sweet and endearing, especially for such a young girl. You couldn’t have gotten a better kid. With much love, you pulled her into your arms and pressed messy kisses that tossed up her hair and made her laugh.

Next, Steve crawled into the bed a bit more when you scooted over for him. He handed you his own card that was, in fact, a letter written on fancy cream stationery with gold foil. It accented the jet black ink of the pen and the smooth strokes that came from Steve’s penmanship.

In his letter were words of appreciation to you for being the loving woman, wife and mother you were. You could tell it was straight from his heart. Steve was always so genuine and you loved him ever so for that.

Not even a second after you put the letter down and pecked Steve’s lips was Sarah excitedly clapping her hands.

“Momma! We got you a present!”

You cocked your head like an intrigued puppy.

“Oh really? What did you get, baby?”

She shook her head, “That’s not how it works, silly goose! Daddy has to get the gift and then you can open it!” Her words didn’t hold any malice or demand, just lots of excitement for giving a gift, that she knew was perfect, to her mom.

Steve quickly got up and returned in no time to your bedroom and placed a huge box wrapped in unicorn paper (Sarah’s doing) in your lap as your daughter had moved to the side.

She watched with much interest as you opened the paper slowly and your jaw dropped when you saw the box. Sarah was relieved to see your reaction.

Inside your box, it was a robot vacuum, something you had been dying to get as there was just not enough time to clean the house by yourself. Even with Steve and Sarah’s help, it was a constant struggle and this little device would help quite a bit.

You let out an excited squeal yourself, something that Sarah often did, and you launched yourself at Steve who was now standing at the bedside.

“Oh Steve! Thank you! I love you so much, I will literally have your babies. You surely know a way into my heart.” A million kisses were placed on his lips and he shook his head before you continued to shower him in affection. Actually, Steve was struggling really hard to not laugh and get the words of truth out.

“It wasn’t all me, sweetheart. It was really your daughter!”

You turned to your daughter and goofily ran over to her with open arms. Scooping her up off the bed you sound around with her in your arms.

Setting down Sarah, you returned back to Steve.

“You must think I’m so crazy, getting excited over a vacuum. God, I’m getting so old.” You made a sound of disgust towards the end and Steve laughed.

“If anyone in this house is old, it’s me. (Y/n) I don’t even know what this thing really does.” Steve widened his eyes for extra effect and you were shocked that he didn’t know. After all, he worked with technology far more advanced than this yet a cell phone could stomp him. He was such an old man and you never stopped teasing him about it. You were relentless with your jokes but Steve enjoyed them nonetheless.

“Oh, well, it’s a vacuum that goes around the house on its own. Y’a know so we don’t have to spend an hour every day doing it ourselves.”

He opened his mouth in awe while you both watched Sarah unpack the box.

“Ma would love this. I remember how bad she wanted a vacuum, just a simple one cost more than our grocery spendings.”

You intently listened to Steve’s short story of how his father had saved up to get his mom a vacuum for her birthday and you smiled at the irony of the recollection. Here their son was, doing almost the same thing for his own wife.

“Times have changed so much, darling, and I’m so glad I have you here to help,” Steve unwrapped his arm from your waist and instead turned to place his hands on your face.

“You are always so patient with me, I just love you so much.” With that, your husband kissed you slowly and for what seemed like minutes. That was until Sarah started to noisily take the styrofoam from that box that you both pulled away and turned to her.

She was awfully excited over the vacuum herself and you found it hilarious. Sarah caught you both glancing at her and waved you over to help with the styrofoam that was crumbling and looking like snow on the bedspread. No one wants to do laundry, let alone on their birthday so you both rushed over to prevent the mess from growing.

After setting up the device, you taught Steve how to work the vacuum from his cell phone, Sarah scrambled through a list of names and you found loads of entertainment in both of them. They were quite the pair and you were so glad to have them in your life, especially on your birthday

#steve rogers #chris evans #steve rogers x reader #dad steve rogers x reader

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sjw-publishings · 4 years ago

Text

A Le’Silver Lining

Based on a story from Midas Touch, by @dumb-and-jocked

“Finish up pronto, or you’re fired.”

Aden sighed, he really wanted to get that promotion, the next step up the corporate ladder, but because of some desperate plea of a ‘millennial-life crisis’, he ended up revealing to his incredibly hot Boss...hoping he had been closeted this entire time.

He was wrong.

Recalling the many words and verbal insults from the strict CEO, it was far from a ‘privilege’ throughout these past few years.

And to be paid a similar wage while handling this douchebag’s laundry is just the icing on the cake.

All he wanted to do was to head towards the top with a faithful partner, but instead his arrogant boss reduced him to some laundry ‘boy’. He was in his mid 20s and treated like some joke.

“This is humiliating!”

Stuffing in the last few piles of clothes, he grumbled, but not too loud just in case his boss spied on him. Turning on the laundry machine as it whirled, done for the day...though not for long knowing how unreasonable that homophobe was.

Folding his arms, pocketing the white gloves he had to wear. As the douche puts it, ‘so he won’t catch the gay’. He rubbed his palms all over his youthful face, trying to contain himself from tearing over his demotion a couple of hours ago, hoping there will be a way to get some power back.

*Shone*

From the corner of his eye came a glint of something shiny, alone at the corner of the clothes basket was a singular watch, which was without a doubt very costly.

Not like his boss’s that shone gold, but rather one of silver. ‘A promising shine...yet dull’. One of the many insults that alpha would arrogantly scoff at him.

“Better polish this before he starts complaining about it.”

As he said that, he grabbed a cloth that appeared to his side and began polishing the accessory. Not realising how the watch voluntarily attached itself to his wrist as his eyes were laser focused on polishing the silver lining.

Le Silver Lining.

His fingernails began trimming themselves short, hands were bigger and more worn...yet eloquent. The changes trailed down his arms, tightening his biceps with lean muscle of a servant who had been tasked with numerous duties beyond laundry.

The boss eventually demanded more from him after all, as the shirt he wore had split into two, the lower layer ironing itself to his chest, sculpting his abdominals to six stones as two modest arches formed the front side of his chest, tightening as the solid foundation gets filled with pectoral muscle.

Starch blue Sleeves rolling down to his wrists, regaining the familiarity of a buttoned down as the upper layer rested over him like a navy suit jacket. He had to look presentable always, even if he was Mr. Conrad’s servant, especially when he had visitors.

Of course, his snobbish boss was always in control, living under his roof meant a rigid schedule with tons of tasks always needing to be done. Buttocks tightening...ensuring there will be no time for any poking from behind.

“He did give me some leeway though.”

Connecting his legs, as the stress pitched a tent beneath his trousers, which shifted to a more expensive quality that he missed, tightening on those knees in dark blue like his suit jacket, as he stood tall over 6ft, slightly shorter than his boss...but definitely the height of a man who was in charge of many things.

The man in the older twenties nodded, as with every swipe, the new reality of his situation became clearer and clearer.

His pouch rested comfortably in those briefs, which came with the uniform ‘to set ‘boys’ straight’ as so he proclaims. Being dedicated to his boss meant he had no time for a long term relationship, seeing men less and being forced to chat with women.

Though with the amount of ladies chatting with him....

“He has been exceptionally generous.”

Huffing out an arrogant flair, starting to appreciate his employer. Yes, he was bi-curious, nothing too serious though, at least with the men.

Plus the watch was, after all, a symbol of gratitude and position from the older male. Despite the consistent banter during his first few years, he really grew on him despite the excessive homophobia.

Because, it was as his boss said, working under him was a privilege.

Both things, he too had inherited from his long time boss. He did serve under him over 16 years, and while Conrad was demanding, he was absolutely generous, as long as one fits into his mould.

Which its something he slid on in perfectly.

“Still, not really my type, no?”

The age gap was less than a decade, but he was not interested in such acts with the man. Putting his foot down, shoes being polished into a prim and proper wing-tip, strictly professional like their relationship.

The strictness was something he did admire in a superior, alongside the pompous arrogance, he probably wouldn’t date the man even if he were gay! Despite it being so arou-

“Non non...what am I thinking?!”

His voice deepened, darkened. His nose wrinkled in disgust, disapproval to his more...’immature’ ways. Aging out to a matured thirty eight, as his skin took on a more elegant and healthy glow. Raised in the life of the wealthy, but with the humility of a servant.

They were simply, Sir and b...Monsieur. A Boss and his trusted butler, a respectable relationship between gentlemen.

Standing up straight, a posture he maintained throughout his years at the CEO’s house, shoulders filling up nicely on his uniform, buttocks being disciplined shut as though he vehemently made a decision to stay far from those kind of acts.

And of course, this choice was made solely on his own.

“Unacceptable, no?”

Smirking to himself, recalling the many rants from Sir Conrad about ‘faguettes’ and how disrespectful youths nowadays were, and the many nights they had fine women over as a result.

Giving a few combs to his hair, tight and thorough hairspray glued his slicked back cut to his scalp, maintaining it since he started as one of the servants in the mansion, the prim and proper look for someone who belonged underneath his employer, yet dashing enough to stand out for the ladies.

And of course, he had a level of authority unlike the supervisors of his boss’s company. Bringing his palm to his face, brushing against the dark brown bristles, stubbles, beard on his chin down to a more concentrated ‘chin strap’ as the locals call it.

Jaw sharpening itself to a cleft, moustache dressing above his upper lip, trimmed and twirled to the ideas from the CEO, with a modest patch of fuzz below his lower lip, mirroring his superior’s well groomed moustache.

Like a shadow, he would do as his employer says, and behave like him...with a Parisian twist.

The experienced servant giving a few final swipes to the watch with ease as the polished beam shone into his eyes, lenses. A pair of rectangular spectacles framed his new perspective, with utmost appreciation to his employer.

Brows arching downward, trimming away any resistance to the loyal affluence of the frenchman’s dark brown eyes. Pocketing away his hankerchief, he turned on the washing machine and made his way to the living room with a pre-prepared cart of treats.

Knowing, according to his watch, its tea time.

“As expected as always, Monsieur.”

Antoine bowed down to his waist, proud of his accomplishment of being second in command to the CEO of C.O.N. Corporations. And while he may not have a title like the fine gentlemen sitting at the boardroom, the Butler had more say in who stays than any of them ever could.

That enough was of satisfaction to the eloquent Parisian.

“Now if you would excuse us, we would like to have the rest of the afternoon undisturbed until a quarter past nine...”

As his boss said that, a fancy looking Madame climbed on top of him, and initiated an intense make out session like every other evening after a special occasion.

“Understood sir, enjoy your session.”

The french butler walked on auto pilot out of the room, leaving them to their heterosexual pursuits. Of course, while he was a fellow ladies man, he wasn’t going to steal the spotlight from his boss. He wasn’t a ‘boy’, but a ‘Monsieur’, and besides...

“Heehee~”

There was someone far more interesting on the staircase...

A french maid, dressed loosely in that typical frilly attire, winked at him. That cheeky vixen...she was literally asking to be painted, pulling his attention from his multitude of assignments to be done, and onto her.

Alas, the ladies do come first, his boss always encouraged his many trysts with women across the mansion, as long as he did a clean job.

And this blonde was no exception, most definitely another generous reward from Sir Conrad, something his eyes savoured by examining those pillows on her mattress.

Removing his glasses, he gave a dashing look at the lady, and daringly spoke.

“Bonjour Mademoiselle, Coffee, Tea, or me?”

#gay to straight #g2s #mental change #personality change #lib to cons #racial change #frenchification #gay #to #straight #butler tf #french tf #a le’silver lining #gay to straight tf #gay to straight tfs

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hyukmoon · 3 years ago

Text

moon. | l.sy x gn!reader

lee sangyeon x gn!reader

word count: about 4.01k

to put it short: congrats! Something you should actually say, right? Your best friend and crush is getting married in two days and you feel,... well, not very good about it. So, wait... he's returning the feelings? Damn.

content warning: ANGST in capital letters, I would add lots of exclamation points but im lazy. So yeah, hella angsty. Some good old making out, it's kind of heavy at some point but no smut at this point lol. I don't condone any of the done actions, so yeah, I would've personally handled everything differently, but you know, y/n is kinda wild. Very awkward sometimes, but that's more the situation in itself. ALSO, NOT PROOFREAD

taglist: @loki-in-hogwarts

note: the second thing i wrote and im somewhat excited!!! Yes! Exclamation points. So,... thanks for reading :)

It was a great day. Well, at least seemingly for everyone but you. Your best friend in this world Sangyeon was about to get married to the love of his life, who is notyou and now you just stand in the hotel lobby waiting for it to happen. Funnily enough, the crushing feeling of desperation and fear didn’t seem to set in yet.

The hotel lobby was filled to the brim with acquaintances and other guests possibly confused by the uproar of the wedding guests. So, who were you specifically waiting for? The rest of your friend group, the ones who will most likely clean up after the wedding whatever will be left of you.

A nervous smile swept up to your lips, casually just avoiding every sort of tension that could come across you. Just with the luck of this entire occurrence an older woman started to approach you, demon alike features spreading around her face almost like she knew you were apparently the only single person here. An aunty, that wasn’t even related to you but had all the business to judge.

“Are you here for the bride or the groom?”, her sweet voice rang a familiar feeling in your stomach. Almost too sweet, making you suspicious of her intent. “I’m here for my best friend, Sangyeon. So, yeah, for the groom.”, you hesitated a second, “What about you though? Do you know the bride?”

“She’s my youngest niece, the only one that still visits, her sisters don’t even care anymore…” You nodded politely, not wanting to anger her now and stepped towards a different direction.

“So, my dear, are you here with anybody?” You already feared that question, the same as always. The eyes of yours started with a panicked expression searching through the room a familiar pair. “No, I am here on my own. I kinda wanted to focus on getting Sangyeon through with it, being there for him.” As a friend.

Possibly this was the first part of feeling despair and fear. People at this wedding were really waiting for them to get married. They weren’t joking, this would change everything.

“Ah, I see. You know, get over him. Well, it is time for you at least, you’re not getting younger. There are quite few handsome men here. I remember the names Juyeon and ah yes! Kevin, get over here!” As far as you were concerned, your facial expression couldn’t possibly look more stunned than a moment ago, yet another one of your good friends appeared, seemingly just as confused.

This only held on for a good second, Kevin knew exactly what to do. “Oh hi, I’m so sorry to steal [Y/N] away from you, but I actually need to talk to them on my own over a gift we both prepared for the couple!”, he grinned at the lady, who was obviously smitten with him. “Yes, of course, hun. Take your time.” She finally hushed into a separate direction.

“So, how are we doing? You seem kinda… stressed.”

“You don’t say”, you sighed, “if I have to go through a conversation like this again today, believe me I’ll-. “

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure I get the sentiment. Even though I meant more the other situation. Like in, Sangyeon getting married and you sitting here all grumpy because of it.”, Kevin was already aware of your “small” infatuation with your best friend, a man too far out of your reach also funnily enough, the man’s wedding you’re attending. However, your friend in front of you didn’t seem to mind talking about it out loud in a place like the hotel lobby. Your lips tightened up into a fine line.

“I’m not grumpy! I just…I don’t really know what to do. I mean, I know I’m going to be there for him but yeah, okay, I might feel a bit grumpy.” The lobby did clear up a lot now.

“Okay, oof. There’s this dinner with everyone in the evening today, do you think you can get through that?”, Kevin asked hesitantly just as stressed with this additional complication.

“I mean, I probably have to, don’t I? This makes me so sick, ugh. Not gonna lie, my stomach feels like a laundry machine.” You laughed quietly and drifted off again into a place where you didn’t need to think about this.

“What did you really expect though? You know I love you, respectfully, but like, this feels like an incredibly bad move to do.”

“Don’t you think it would be worse if I didn’t show up at all? I’ll just need to go through this weekend and I’m outta here. No one will know anything.” It might feel like a nightmare but at least a nightmare you can actually run away from and not actually have to face at some point.

“Well, I hope you’ll keep your confidence. Because imagine I saw the person, I love getting married to someone else. Oh my, believe me, you wouldn’t find me for the next three weeks.”

“Not very helpful, a good three out of ten. I guess, I’ll just stick to sulking around then.” A dead smile crept up your lips following a stern look from your side at your opposite.

“Seems like a good plan, just stick to me, maybe we will find someone to take your attention away from this, huh?” A sly grin was visible on Kev’s face.

“Ughhh, of course. Let’s do this. It can’t get much worse than that”, you cleared your throat, “thanks, though. You actually make this here somewhat bearable.”

“Awww, come on. We should pack out our suitcases.”

No one can really prepare someone for a moment like this. Most older folk turned into their hotel rooms which left you in a party like situation seeing your closest friends turning it up in a huge pavilion while the future groom sits comfortably on a velvety sofa hand in hand with his fiancée.

The air was quite warm even at this time of the evening, not humid, just warm enough for everyone to taste the end of this era with nostalgia and a slight feeling of energy to experience what’s to come afterwards.

You as well sat down, continuously processing your environment. With a cup of your favorite drink, you felt invincible, nothing able to shake you down.

Now while this wasn’t a preferred environment, this was manageable; you could look your best friend into his eyes and proudly congratulate him on his wedding. You would be able to get over this and continue to be a great friend. Black hair with an intense facial expression made its way into your viewpoint along with a somewhat tipsy Kevin. Simultaneously the lighter hair of your best friend fought his way through the crowd.

Lee Sangyeon, the man lighting up your mood with simple touch of his fingertips was now signalizing for you to head outside towards the veranda of the pavilion. He exuded patience, yet clearly waiting for a response of you. You nodded and brushed cautiously over your evening attire.

“Hii, [Y/N]! Can I introduce this someone to you? This is Juyeon, he might look a bit intense, but he’s really nice to talk to! So, I’m gone for a sec then!” Kevin started drifting off into a different direction where you stopped him in his tracks.

“Could this wait? Sangyeon needs to talk to me. I think it’s important, I’ll come back though in a bit!” You gifted both of them an apologetic face and made your way around the men towards the going to be groom.

Surely it wasn’t exactly clear why he wanted to speak to you, especially on his own. He was still waiting for you after all.

“[Y/N]! What has it been? Like three? Four months? I missed you so much.”, Sangyeon pulled you into his chest abruptly and sighed softly into your shoulder. Engulfed entirely in his figure you never wanted to wake up from this again. Was it now 10 seconds? 15 seconds? Neither he nor you really seemed to let go, taking in all the scents of his that were formerly familiar to you.

“Yeah, I think so. You were probably busy planning this all and I just had to work, I guess.” Trying to keep it short was your main goal, appearing distant maybe. He didn’t mind at all though. Not discouraged from continuing this conversation Sangyeon pointed at the veranda, showing the only speck of space with little to no crowd.

The veranda was close to closed off to the party. Non distinguishable palm trees in the far distance were playing right into your cards for not having to look into his eyes. Magnetically glowing, that’s how he appeared. All happy and smiley about the obvious luck he was experiencing. Now again, he sat down with you in the beach chairs without loosing a word.

“The palm trees are so pretty. You remember me wanting to buy some new plants?”, you tried to invite him to the conversation.

“You always want to buy new plants, which time do you mean?” Sangyeon grinned to himself. “You know what? It’s so weird. Everything feels still so unreal. This wedding, also you at my wedding… So weird.”

“I am literally your best friend, where else should I be? Your funeral? At home? Who else is going to charm the hotel staff for some free capri suns and new towels?” Your mouth crinkled up and you let out a soft laugh.

“[Y/N] … You know exactly what I mean!”

“Noo, not at all. I’m so confused right now, not gonna lie.” Your face finally moved towards his direction, seeing his gentle gaze resting on you.

“Do you remember when we were still in school, and we promised each other we would marry each other if we didn’t find anybody else?” His gaze got more intense with each sentence.

“Yeahh, kind of. I was probably tired and it’s like ten years ago. I’m not really sure what you’re trying to tell me.”

“I really thought I was going to marry you. For several years, actually.”, he laughed. “I had such a crush on you and then you met your s/o and all that. Ughh, it seemed so complicated back then. Kind of weird to think about what could have happened if I did ask you out or something.”

“True.”, you turned away again standing up and resting against the wooden railing of the pavilion. “But you didn’t so, let’s just drop it there.” The weather as well started rebelling a bit, the wind hugging your figure slightly too tight for your taste.

“Why are you so cold all of a sudden?”, he whispered closely behind you.

“Well, you’re getting married tomorrow. And you’re telling me about a crush you had on me?”, you croaked.

“I was just being nostalgic, I thought this would be fine with you.” Sangyeon appeared now next to you on the railing, waiting for you to face his concerned dark eyes.

“It isn’t for me. It just feels wrong.”

“What feels so wrong about it? It was a long time ago.”

It is here, the bitterness. Bitterness shouldn’t even be the correct term, the pain of your heart going into a slump didn’t feel like a fitting word. Being reminded again that you will never have a chance again.

“Wait or is it not a long time ago for you?”, The voice of his tried to word his next sentence very carefully.

“I went out with them because I thought you were joking. Then when I thought about you, it was always different. It was too late though, you met her.” Only the close ocean along with the wind were hearable, neither you nor he were able to form another thought put into a sentence.

“You could’ve told me. I would’ve-.”

“Broken up with her?”

“No, I-.”

“Then what could you have done?”, you interrupted Sangyeon’s rambling, trembling while speaking. Terribly spiteful with a bite that wasn’t too often dripping down your lips.

“This.” Sangyeon pressed a fluttery kiss against your lips. Slender fingers tapped onto the skin right under your chin, signalizing you to look at him.

The now much calmer atmosphere made you snake your arms around his torso. Heat rose towards your head, longing after a second out in the cold again just to see his lovely facial expression. Your lips broke off and touched once more in an almost hypnotic fashion.

His hot breath started sliding downwards your cheek to your neck, physically making you unable to resist his entrancing presence. Also his hands broached over from your face down to your waist, holding you with the lightest touch.

Sangyeon’s lips darted away from yours, catching you staring deeply into his eyes. The silence felt warm now as well, filled with the slow and recovering breath of the participants.

“[Y/N], I think I still feel that way.”, a rosy blush swept over the man’s face you wanted to hear say these things so many times and so long ago.

“No. No. No. You shouldn’t! I shouldn’t either! I have to go.” The reality of the situation caught up to you. This was bad. Incredibly bad. Still the disgusting feeling of hope within this made its way up to your head. Stinging alongside the feeling of remorse, you didn’t think clearly, especially now, next to him.

You darted in the fastest way possible from the pavilion up to the hotel to your room, leaving him there.

Today should be the final day. The hopes that already should have been buried a long time ago, crawled up again and clawed its way into your mind. What if he leaves her for you today? Like in those unrealistic rom coms. Yes, again, it was unrealistic.

Leaving her at the altar and running after you. While all those thoughts of hope and wishes came together you found yourself with a stomachache. His fiancée was an incredibly nice person, sweet and kind along with being a beauty. You shouldn’t even dare to think about Sangyeon that way anymore, she deserved a lot more. Quite honestly, you felt pathetic. Who were you to run into their possible future?

Just because of a simple brush over the lips, his eyes staring into yours like no one else existed but you and his soft hands delicately touching your waist. A tap on your shoulder put you out of your trance, “[Y/N]? Can you go up to Sangyeon’s room? He asked for you.” Kevin’s eyes glanced at you with uncertainty. Neither you nor he knew why he wanted to see you.

Even more importantly, why did he need to see you alone? This seemed like dangerous territory after, basically yesterday. Agony rose again, what if he really was going to leave her?

“Sure, I don’t know why he wants to see me again though.”, you said and left to see the groom’s room. You stumbled more and more over every step closer to the door of the man who’s going to rip your heart and air out of your lungs. The normally soft laid out carpet felt in this moment like you were stepping barefoot over glass. There was the door, brightly painted in eggshell paired with the digits of the hotel room.

Before you could reach the door to knock on it, light brown waves greeted your overtly surprised face.

“You clean up well.”, Sangyeon’s rang in your ears clearer than freshly hung-up laundry in your nose. His previously concerned face curled up into a faint smile.

“Same goes for you”, you tried your best to hide the very apparent frog in your throat, “So, why do you need me?”

“Just needed to see you before going out there, I guess.”, his voice got a lot quieter. It got silent.

Not sure if a said word was necessary, you plopped down on a small, velvety stool. Every whisper was to be heard. An otherness surrounded Sangyeon, like he wasn’t there anymore, and his thoughts took over his being. You scooted closer towards him, just wanting to see him up close for the last time like this, smelling his earthy cologne from this distance.

“Why are you doing this to me?”, your voice went close to hoarse after the question. He was just as silent as before. No sound, nothing. This torment of a weekend was supposed to end with no gratification, not feeling free from this feeling on your chest? Your hand slid over his, the most desperate attempt to get his attention while also experiencing his touch again. Sangyeon jerked his hand back and returned to his absent posture.

“Why do you want to hurt me like this? I am your best friend, and you use me like I’m nothing.” The lack of power you had now made you sink down to the beige teddy carpet. Small tears started swelling up in your nearly dry eyes, kind of contradictory, yet the more tear drops rolled down your cheeks the rottener and hollow you felt.

“You were my best friend until you-.”, he stopped midsentence, “made me feel things again I didn’t need, I didn’t want.” Also his face was wet, ridden with tears making his usually calm and cheerful persona look like a painful insult.

“You asked me here. It hurts, Sangyeon. I can’t make it stop hurting, I don’t know what to do”, you reached for him again, “Could I ever be enough for you?” He returned your former attempts to stroke your face. Cornering both of you, the air trapped you in the toxins of heartbreak and hopelessness.

Once again, Sangyeon’s hand glid over your soft skin and halted on your face. Glaringly staring into each other’s eyes, you were there again. The day before, yesterday. Close to baring the soul of each person present.

“[Y/N], it’s not about being enough. It never has been. I have made a commitment I already broke, I…I can’t do this”, he sighed, “you know I love her.”

“I thought you loved me as well.” Overwhelming nothingness overruled you, almost scaring you about this reaction. You weren’t crying, yelling nor having any physical reaction at all. It was convincingly numb; the resting hurt would come later. Sangyeon’s head dropped in the dip of your shoulder and neck.

This sort of closeness would never happen again. You feeling him breathing into you while having his comforting heartbeat close to yours.

“I do, but I can’t do this to her. I would never do this to her.”, he whispered into your shoulder. A sigh came from his side.

“Then, please. Kiss me, for the last time.” The last part of the sentence left a disgustingly bitter taste in your mouth. This was over, right? His head, which was formerly resting on your shoulder, drifted up and towards yours. Also his expression blank and hollow, like he didn’t know anything.

For the last time, his hands cupped your face in a comfortable manner. As always, he felt homely, but he surely wasn’t yours ever. Not even waiting a good second or two, the light brunette’s face came closer to yours. With no hesitation both of your lips touched tenderly, releasing every sort of affection that could be expressed at that second. You inhaled again his intoxicating scent, in the hopes of having him all over you. His now reddened lips moved closer towards your jawline making you gasp for air.

Also, you weren’t completely still, constantly shifting your hands up and down over his torso upwards his neck, desperately feeling everything, you can for the last time. Sangyeon’s locks tickled you softly while he suddenly latched his mouth onto your neck right below your ear.

“No. Please, I just want a kiss on my lips.”, you said lowly, closely resembling a whine afterwards. He complied pretty quickly, leaving you with no thought but him tickling your bottom lip with his warm tongue. With him being this fast, you didn’t want to keep him on his toes. Entirely engaged in this moment, hands surprised you again on your waist, wandering closer and closer under the blouse you were wearing. You moaned into the kiss, making him take the opportunity to maneuver his tongue into your mouth.

Similarly to you, he was also stunned for a short moment when you grabbed up onto some strands of hair. A sigh left his now plump lips, a need of fresh air arrived onto both of you. Yet this was short lived, his hands captured your chin and attached his lips again onto yours in a matter of mere seconds. A bell rang, close footsteps to be heard across the floor reminding you of the situation you were in.

“Why am doing this? I am so sorry.”, you broke off his lips and took a step backwards at the door.

“[Y/N], we both did this, and it won’t happen again. We just need some time without each other. I think it would be for the best if we don’t spend time together alone anymore.”

“Are you doing what I think you’re doing? I don’t know what to say. I-.”, His lips captured yours again fast with a lot more force behind his kiss.

A strong arm shut the about to be opened door again and hovered over your head. The other one caught grabbed your chin with an almost contradictory feeling to it, the lightest touch just to shove you into his direction. You sighed into his lips, waiting for him to commit with his tongue one more time. Buttery lips pressed against yours and clang inside your mouth. Fiercely did your tongues meet, ending with him sucking on yours. Wet cheeks batting against each other with no intent of separating, your movement still came to a halt.

“You know what? I hate this. I want you to be happy, then if it is with her, I will just y’know…go or uhm mind my business.”, you slurred the last part. It wasn’t really one of your most prideful moments. Still flushed with tears and embarrassment you dropped again against the room door.

“I ask for one condition though,” incredibly hearse was your voice after the crying and even more so because of your follow up, “I do not not want to see you for some time, I don’t want to have to see your face ever again.” Tears weren’t anymore swelling up in your eyes, they never seemed to stop running down with no chance of leaving this conversation with an ounce of self-respect and pride.

It wasn’t even really much of a problem to leave him behind for a bit, it most likely would be for the best anyway, yet while his words should only leave a small mark and feel like a ripped off band aid, you felt alone. A sense of loneliness crept stealthily into you leaving you with nothing but a severe feeling of dread.

“If that is what you want, I’ll respect that.” The room got quieter till you heard the last of his words: “Of course, I still want you in on my wedding though, you’re still my best friend.” Sangyeon’s usual soft and kind smile appeared on his face, seemingly reaching you an olive branch. The former assertiveness and confidence drained through the conversation; you were nothing but a wreck.

“Alright, I’ll be there.”

The ceremony was beautiful. Fairy like flowers were hung all across the beach space, making the place more surreal than it was to begin with. Everything light with a hint of light green and an even lighter lavender tone. The air seemed to have evaporated all the tension and sadness from your face. All across the seats were relatives and friends sitting with a nervously happy face. Ironically, he really thought it was going to be you someday.

“You’re [Y/N], right? Everyone always tried to introduce me to you. Now we’re sitting next to each other at Sangyeon’s wedding together! I’m Juyeon by the way.”

#lee sangyeon x reader #sangyeon x reader #lee sangyeon #sangyeon #tbz #tbz fic #tbz angst #the boyz fic #the boyz #the boyz au #the boyz scenarios #sangyeon x you #sangyeon x y/n #the boyz x reader #sangyeon tbz #the boyz kevin #the boyz juyeon #moon kevin #lee juyeon

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yesmooshoe · 4 years ago

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6) (i) from the AU list for ironhusbands? 👀💖

You’ve got a date tonight and you asked for advice on what to wear but I’m so in love with you and damn you look good in the outfit I picked out for you.

“Rhodey Rhodey Rhodey! I need help!” Tony cried out as he burst through the front door of their drafty apartment.

Rhodey’s head shot up to look at him, but he didn’t move from the nest he’d created on their couch. He was wrapped in several blankets with a few large stacks of books and notebooks surrounding him. Mid-Terms started next week, and he had a lot of material to get through.

As Tony stumbled over some of Rhodey’s books on his way into the living room, he finally noticed all of the shopping bags that Tony was carrying.

“Did you get a haircut?” Rhodey asked, seeing that his friend’s usually unkempt hair was freshly trimmed and styled.

“Yeah, and I got a bunch of new clothes. I have a date! An actual date! And all of my clothes are trash and I’ve got no idea what to wear so I went to the mall and just like bought everything that looked cool because I just really want her to think I’m cool.” Tony rambled as he dropped the bags to the floor and started tearing through them.

“Wait, hold up. You have a what?”

“A date!” Tony said with a big smile.

“With who?” Rhodey asked as he closed his book, realizing that this was going to be a thing. Tony didn’t date. If he wasn’t at the apartment he was either at class or in the robotics lab, and he didn’t really have any other friends.

Until this year, at least. Tony was 17 and finally the same age as some of his fellow classmates, so Rhodey had noticed him being a bit more social. Still, Rhodey felt very protective, and while he’d never admit it out loud, he kind of missed having Tony all to himself.

“Uh, Amy Lin? She’s a freshman! And she’s on the robotics team and she’s just super cool and smart and we were sitting outside today and she was like 'hey do you want to go out sometime?' and I was like 'what do you mean, we're already outside.' and then she laughed and was like 'no like...go out. On a date.' and I just felt like such an idiot and I didn't know what to say but eventually I managed to say yes I think and well now we're going on a date! And I have no idea what to wear, you gotta help me. Everything I own is ripped or has burn holes from welding or is covered in grease and who knows what else and I just want to look good."

Rhodey resisted the urge to tell him that he'd look good in a paper bag, and did his best to swallow his own jealousy before he started helping him look through the bags.

The crush on Tony was very new.

Two years ago Tony had just been this quiet, nerdy kid who didn't know how to do his own laundry and was afraid of his own shadow. This year though? This year he was just different. Over the Summer he'd grown a few more inches, gotten his braces off, discovered contact lenses, and overall just came off as more mature and confident. Rhodey's jaw had literally dropped when he saw him for the first time at the beginning of the semester, and ever since then he'd been struggling with a lot of feelings.

"Uhh, ok. Well first of all, where are you going?" Rhodey asked as he pulled out item after item, which ranged from a leather jacket to a tuxedo, so he wasn't sure what the vibe was going to be.

"Bowling."

Rhodey just laughed. "You bought a brand new tuxedo to go bowling? Is that what you rich white people do?"

"I...I mean, I don't know. She mentioned maybe getting dinner at one point and I think I just panicked like what if she wanted to go somewhere fancy instead of bowling and all of a sudden and I just started grabbing everything I could possibly need." Tony explained, sounding a bit exasperated.

"Dude, take a deep breath. It's going to be ok."

"I know I just...I want to do everything right. I want her to like me, ya know?"

"She will! She already does. She asked you out, didn't she?"

"Yeah but...I don't know. I don't know what to do. I'm just not used to this. People liking me. I’ve always been so much younger than everyone at school and no one ever talked to me and I always just feel like I missed out on learning how to be a normal teenager. I don’t know how to date." Tony admitted, being way more candid about his feelings than Rhodey was used to.

"You don’t have to worry about that anymore. Just go out and have fun. Be yourself."

"I’m just afraid she’s going to see what a huge nerd I am and change her mind."

“You guys are on the robotics team. You’re both nerds. It’ll be fine.

“I just -

“Tony.” Rhodey Interrupted. He hated when Tony got like this, and something in him just snapped. “Stop being so down on yourself. You’re funny and smart and sweet and you tell great stories and you’re so enthusiastic about your work and about learning new things so that you can change the world. You’re incredible. And I’m sorry that no one in your life has ever told you that before, but it’s all true and if she sees what I see then...then she’ll love you, ok?”

Tony was just staring at him like a deer in headlights, and Rhodey immediately knew that he’d said way too much. He just hated when Tony got like this, and he wanted him to just see how great he actually was.

“Rhodey I…” Tony started, clearly unsure of what to say in response to that, and Rhodey’s stomach just dropped. Had he completely fucked this up? Had he made everything weird? There was nothing weird about telling your friend that you love him, right? Even if you did happen to have a huge crush on that friend?

They were both silent for what felt like forever, though in reality it was only a few seconds.

“You’ll be fine. Anyway. So when is this date?”

Tony glanced down at his watch. “I’m supposed to meet her in 45 minutes.”

“Well, then we’d better get to work.” Rhodey said as he stood up and grabbed an armload of clothes.

They made quick work of it, just putting Tony in jeans, a red t-shirt, the leather jacket, and a fresh pair of Chuck Taylors. They were a little quiet at first, but soon they found their way back to the joking and teasing they were used to. As Tony stood in the hallway trying to fix his hair the way the lady at the hair salon had told him too, Rhodey just stood back and admired his work. There was nothing spectacular about the clothes, but they were new and clean and fit him well. And the leather jacket was driving Rhodey crazy. As he watched Tony from behind, he wanted nothing more than to grab him, pin him against the wall, and have his way with him.

There were a million reasons why he shouldn’t do that, especially since he was literally about to leave to go on a date with someone else. With a girl.

“How do I look?” Tony asked, spinning around and giving him a big smile.

“Great.” Rhodey replied simply, resisting the urge to say hot. He didn’t want to make anything else weird.

Tony seemed unsure, but looked at his watch again and took a deep breath. “Right. Well, I gotta go. Thank you. For everything. Don’t study too hard, all right?” He said with a little smile before taking one more look at himself in the mirror and then heading out.

Rhodey tried to focus on studying after that, but he just couldn’t. He was jealous, he was embarrassed, and most of all he was horny. He took care of the latter problem a few minutes after Tony left, but after that he just laid on his bed and started at a crack in the ceiling while a million thoughts raced through his head.

This crush on Tony was stupid. Tony obviously wasn’t gay, right? And being gay in the Air Force sounded like a not-so-great idea anyway, so Rhodey really had to work on resisting these crushes if he ever wanted the chance to fly. Still, he couldn’t get that image of Tony in the leather jacket out of his mind, nor could he get over how jealous he felt.

He figured that the best way to get over it was to distract himself, so he got up, took a cold shower, ate some dinner, and settled in back on the couch to watch TV and wait for Tony to get home. Despite the jealousy, he wanted to hear about the date and how it went. He just wanted Tony to be happy, and if dating Amy made him happy, then he’d do his best to be enthusiastic about it. At least on the surface.

Not long after Rhodey settled on the couch Tony came home and immediately plopped down next to him.

“Hey, you’re home early. How’d it go?” Rhodey asked, genuinely shocked that he was home. It hadn’t even been two hours, and he was just glad that he hadn’t decided to jerk off again.

“Yeah, it was fine. I mean, I had fun. We bowled and had some pizza and then sketched up an idea on a napkin for a bowling robot that we might try to build next week.” Tony said as he stared at the floor while fidgeting around with his zipper. “And then like, we were in the arcade part. Playing pinball. And she kissed me.”

“Well hey! That’s good, right?”

“I don’t know. It was weird. I mean, I’ve never kissed anyone before so I’ve not got much to compare it too. But like, it was like kissing my sister. If I had a sister, I guess. I don’t know. Just didn’t do much for me.” Tony admitted quietly, and Rhodey had no idea how to respond to that. Luckily, Tony kept talking. “And then it was a little awkward and she said that she didn’t feel like bowling anymore so we turned in our shoes and then she said that she thought that maybe we should just be friends.”

“Oh. Well shit, that sucks man, I’m sorry. But this is only your first date, there are plenty of other girls out there! There’s even at least 1 more on the robotics team, right? I’m sure you’ll find someone that makes you feel that spark.” Rhodey said as he put his hand on Tony’s shoulder. He just didn’t want him getting too down on himself.

Tony just looked up at him and smiled, and it was a look that Rhodey would have to file away to use later. “Thanks. Yeah, it’s fine. She still wants to be friends, so that’s good. Friends are good. I’m gonna go change, ok?”

“Sure.”

Tony stood up to head to his room, but then stopped and hesitated for a moment.

“Tony? You all right?” Rhodey asked as Tony turned to look at him. He was quiet for a moment, like he was searching for what to say.

“Are you doing anything Friday night?” Tony finally asked.

“No.” Rhodey answered, confused.

“Do you - would you be interested in like - going out?”

“W-what?” Rhodey stuttered out as his heart started pounding. This wasn’t actually happening, was it?

“Go out? Like...on a date? I guess? Unless I read that whole situation earlier wrong.”

“I…” Rhodey just trailed off, completely taken by surprise by all of this. “Um. A date?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh. Uh...ok. Yeah. We can do that, if you’re sure.”

Tony nodded. “I’m sure. Been thinking about it all night.”

“Oh.”

“Ok, so. It’s a date, yeah? Dinner? Movie? I don’t know, that’s what people do, right?” Tony said as he shoved his hands deep into his jacket pockets.

“We’ll figure something out.”

Tony nodded again and turned to head to his room.

“Hey, Tony?” Rhodey called out after him, causing Tony to stop and turn to him. “Whatever we do, promise me you’ll wear the leather jacket.” Rhodey said with a confident little smile, finally regaining a bit of composure.

A huge grin spread across Tony’s face, like he was finally relaxing too. “All right.”

Rhodey was terrified, but also so excited that he couldn’t imagine focusing on his notes anymore. After Tony disappeared Rhodey ran straight to his room and to his closet, desperately looking through all of his clothing. Nothing seemed good enough, so he figured he’d have to take a trip to the mall himself tomorrow. He wasn’t sure he could look as good as Tony did in the leather, but he could certainly try.

#rhodee #ironhusbands #tonyrhodey #rhodeytony #james rhodes #tony stark #mooshfics #hello tony looks very good in leather jackets and rhodey agreeeeeeees #asks

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mxchellesworld · 4 years ago

Text

𝟑 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐝 - 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟓

𝐒𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐑𝐞𝐢𝐝 𝐱 𝐂𝐚𝐭 𝐀𝐝𝐚𝐦𝐬 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: 𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐚 𝐫𝐮𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐂𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐒𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐞𝐧𝐯𝐲.

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: mentions of sex and masturbation

𝐒𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 | 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫

***

It had been a few days since you’d seen Cat and Spencer. After lunch you decided it was time to make your way back home. A quick exchange of numbers and the promise of seeing each other soon and you were back to your mundane routine of getting adjusted to the city. The short uber ride to your apartment, which they insisted they paid for, was spent answering texts from your friends and confirming you were still alive after they left you.

You spent the rest of the day doing laundry for the week and cleaning bits of your apartment. It was still pretty bleak, with empty walls which you longed to fill with pictures and art. Your room was a bit more lively with knitted blankets your aunt made long ago and the light of the warm lamp in the corner filling the space.

Sunday was bland with the task of getting groceries. You decided to walk since the store was a block away. You made your way down the streets in a simple sweater and leggings, foregoing any makeup. Walking into the store the older lady at the register greeted you with a kind smile.

Picking up a basket you made your way down the isles trying to get your things quickly to get back home and sleep the day away. While searching the snack section you stood in front of the popcorn deciding between buttered or kettle. You heard footsteps and saw a worker make his way down to restock the shelf.

He was tall and you noticed the way his shirt rose as he reached the top shelf. Spencer could probably reach that no problem, you thought to yourself. He caught you staring and turned to you with a smile.

“Having a movie night?” he asked walking closer. You could smell the scent of his cologne, strong but not overpowering.

“Not really haha, but don’t get me wrong a catch up day of my favorite show is definitely on the list,” you replied returning with a small smile.

He leaned in reaching for one of the boxes, subtly boxing you into the space.

“Well this is my favorite kind,” he said handing you the box, “Ya know perfect to amount to eat alone.. or share.”

“Oh,” you said surprised with a chuckle trying to play off the heat rushing to your cheeks.

You were about to respond when you heard a voice from the end of the aisle, “Y/n.”

Think of the devil and he shall appear.

Spencer was walking over to you holding his own basket filled with essentials like milk and bread. He looked like he did on Saturday, wearing those grey sweatpants which made you thank the stars above. On top he had on a simple tshirt and cardigan combo making him look extra cozy.

“Hey Spence,” you said looking past the employee.

“Did you get the popcorn baby?” he said looking the worker up and down.

You furrowed your brow seeing what he was playing at, “Yeah yeah, he was just giving me a recommendation,” you turned back to the worker, “thanks again.”

The worker nodded, red in the cheeks from facing Spencers death glare, before he walked away and rounded the corner.

“What the fuck was that,” you both said at the same time.

“He was just trying to help,” you said waving around the box of popcorn.

“Come on princess you’re smarter than that. He was obviously trying to flirt with you.”

You scoffed before answering, “What don’t tell me you’re jealous.”

“Oh I’m not,” he said with a smirk, “I’m confident in the fact we’ve proved who you belong to.”

You rolled your eyes before he spoke again, “Plus I know a boy like him could never satisfy a greedy little whore like you. Tell me, are the handprints still there?”

You opened and closed your mouth not being able to answer him. The laugh he let out told you he new he had won.

“I think I’m done shopping,” you said walking past him.

“Alright princess have a good rest of your day. But don’t think Cats not hearing about this, and she won’t be very happy.”

You felt your insides heat up at the thought of Cat knowing. What she would do to you.

“Uh huh bye Sir,” you said stressing the title.

You made your way to the older lady who you saw when you walked in, “Find everything alright?” she asked kindly. You nodded and pulled out your wallet to pay.

God she had no idea.

That interaction replayed in your mind from that night into your days at work. Neither of them had texted. Maybe Spencer forgot and never told Cat. The wait for something to happen was torturous.

Your friend had noticed you were spaced out. Looking longingly at your phone during your breaks or lunch. It wasn’t like your feelings were hurt much for being ignored but more so the ache between your thighs was having a reaction. As you predicted trying to use your fingers or that sad vibrator in your bedside drawer was doing nothing to aid your release.

You were out at the cafe around the corner from the office you worked at having lunch with one of your coworkers. She was going on about the night she had with the guy from the bar over the weekend.

“Then he bent me over the couch! God it was so good,” she all but moaned.

“Uh huh.”

“I swear we were up until like 4 am going round after round,” she continued.

“Right.”

“After that we sacrificed a goat on Saturn.”

“Oh wow,” you said looking down at the unlit rectangle next to your sandwich.

“Y/n,” she said snapping her fingers in front of you.

“What,” you said raising an eyebrow.

“You’re being really shitty right now. I’m trying to tell you about how I literally got my back blown out and you’re staring at your phone like it’s gonna unlock the key to your future,” she said exasperatedly.

Welp she wasn’t entirely wrong.

“Abbie I’m sorry. I’m just waiting on a text. But please tell me more,” you said nodding for her to continue.

“No, I wanna know fucked you stupid this weekend to make you act like a lovesick puppy,” she said putting her elbows on the table to rest her face in her palm.

You internally debated telling her. I mean so far she has been the nicest and most welcoming to you, definitely bff material. But on the other hand you didn’t know if you were allowed to bring them up to other people. Technically it wasn’t a rule and what they didn’t know didn’t hurt them.

You took in a deep breath before spilling your guts,” So basically after I noticed you guys were gone I accidentally walked into a sex club then later that night I fucked the owners and now we’re in a throuple type situation.” You ended with an awkward smile and waited for her reaction.

“Oh the bdsm club? Isn’t it like the Library something?” she said casually.

You sat there blinking for a while, “Out of everything I said thats the part that caught your attention.”

“So you had a threesome, very nice, we’ll get to that part. Tell me about the club.”

“Uh ok. We’ll it’s called the Underground Library and it’s what you’d imagine any bdsm lounge would be like. Red lights and sexy music playing in the back. There’s a bar and uh playrooms where you can watch others.”

She hummed taking in the information and sipping on her latte, “So the sex?”

“God it was so fucking good.” You both laughed and you spent the last few minutes of your lunch break telling her about what they did to you. Safe to say you knew your panties would be a mess by the end of the day just replaying those memories in your head.

It was finally Thursday, you were so close to the work week ending and having a night with Abbie. The plan was for her to help you do a little shopping for your home then redecorate and spend the rest of the night sipping on wine with a pizza. Absolutely perfect.

The day went by yet again without a notification from the people you wanted. At this point you came to the conclusion the incident was forgotten and left in the past.

Friday you woke up around 10 and let yourself lay in bed, answering emails and lounging around until noon for you to get ready for your day with Abbie. After a while you got up to make a quick breakfast and make a list of items you planned on buying.

You thought about getting a throw for the couch and some nice curtains. Maybe some wall decor. You were so excited to finally have a place to yourself and style it to your liking.

Having roommates in college was fun but the solidarity of being able to walk around your own place basically naked and sing as loud as you wanted was liberating.

Noon rolled around and you made your way to the bathroom to take a shower. The water pressure on your shoulders was breaking through to all the stress of the week and you instantly felt it melting away.

You hopped out, wrapping yourself in a fluffy towel and looking in your closet for what to wear. You settled for jeans and an oversized flannel, putting some comfy booties on your feet. You looked at your phone to see Abbie had texted and she would be on her way in 45 minutes. Using the remaining time you did your hair and makeup, just the basics for your day out.

Your phone dinged with a simple text that read “here”, you grabbed your purse and the list on your kitchen counter and made your way to the elevator.

You saw her little red car right in front of your building. The sound of music playing through the speakers could be heard from a few feet away.

You pulled the door open and she greeted you with a big smile, “Hey! You ready to spend away that paycheck,”

You laughed before answering, “You know it.”

The trip was made with nothing but laughs and a horrible mix of you guys singing to the radio.

After a few hours and trips to multiple stores you guys stopped at one of the vendors in the mall to get some soft pretzels. Looking around you saw a fancy lingerie store and an idea popped into your head.

You tapped Abbie on the shoulder to get her attention, “Hey I know you’re dead on your feet but theres one store I wanna go to. Do you wanna just grab a table? I’ll be like 20 minutes tops.”

“Yeah no prob Y/n/n,” she said holding her hand out for the bags you had in your hand, “this cinnamon twist is calling my name.” You both shared a giggle before you turned and skipped over to the store.

A woman wearing a dark purple sweater greeted you, “Hello darling, are you looking for anything in particular?”

“Nope I’m just taking a look around, thanks,’ you said with a smile.

Walking around you saw a display of a matching set. It was baby pink and lacy and it left little to the imagination of the mannequin. Perfect.

You looked over the table finding the set in your size and walking to the dressing rooms. Quickly you basically ripped your clothes off, speeding to get the fabric on your curves. It was stunning, complimenting your skin and hugging your curves.

You pulled your phone out and hit the messaging icon. If they weren’t gonna text then you had to bite the bullet and put on your big girl panties to do it first.

Typing in each of their contact names you made a groupchat and hit the camera option. You lifted your hand to get a flattering angle and gave the mirror your best pout.

“Do you think it’s a good color?” Sent.

One last glance in the mirror and you knew this was going home with you. Changing back into your clothes you slipped your phone in your pocket and made your way to the register.

“Just this for you today honey,” the woman asked.

“Yup,” you said pulling out your wallet. You heard the chime of a text and a smirk came across your face. Finishing the transaction you were excited to see what their reaction was.

Walking back to Abbie you saw her on the phone and raised your brow in question. She started to get up and you took some of the bags from her hands. Once she was done with the call she put her phone in her purse and looked over to you.

“Change of plans. Sam, the guy from the club, called and he’s coming over to mine tonight. So raincheck on the wine and pizza?”

You waved a hand dismissing what she said, “You’re all good, go catch that dick.” She laughed and pulled out her keys as you guys made your way out of the mall.

In the car you pulled your phone out to check the message. It was from Cat.

“I’m not sure. Maybe your little friend from the grocery store can help you pick.”

So Spencer did tell her.

You quickly replied, “You know green isn’t a good look on either of you.”

Another chime. “Why would I be envious? Last time I checked you came on my fingers, in my bed.”

You felt your cheeks heat up at her words. You tried to think of a response but this time Spencer responded.

“Come to the lounge at 7. And wear that underneath your clothes.”

“Yes Sir.” was all you said and the conversation ended.

Looks like you and Abbie both had other plans for the night anyways.

𝐚/𝐧; 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫 𝐢'𝐦 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐢𝐭. 𝐢 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐨 𝐟𝐚𝐫!!

#spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid smut #spencer reid x reader #cat adams x reader #cat adams smut #Criminal Minds Fanfiction #criminal minds smut #chellewrites

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iampikachuhearmeroar · 3 years ago

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so this morning, while scrolling through my fb feed, i came across an nyt opinion/advice piece from a 27yo (ie basically me lmao) who is obviously lucky, in a sense, to finally land their “dream job using my (their) skills” etc. like obvs i can’t read it bc of the stupid “you get one free article a month if you either don’t have an account or subscription” (my one free article was used up reading an article about adult adhd like last week)….. thing that nyt does.

but anyway. back on topic lol. the crux of the article in both the headline and the quote snippet was that the advice asker was really dissatisfied with the 40 hour work week that came with her “dream job”. with how having this 40hr workweek gave her no time to do her busy chores like house cleaning or laundry or didn’t even give her time to let her have her hobbies/creative pursuits (whatever they were/are).

however, in the comments on the article (and apparently from those who read the article on the comments, the advice/opinion column writer) a good bunch of like gen Xer’s and baby boomers (im assuming) were ganging up on the asker like “suck it up princess, it’s what life is!!! i work 70+ hours a week and LOVE IT and have just resigned myself to the fact that i have NO time left over to do my “chores”! learn to O U T S O U R C E these life admin tasks to someone else!!! everyone MUST LEARN this in america!!! it makes life so much easier ☺️” and such.

of course, there were plenty of the same bs comments that you see on anything about careers or home ownership towards millennials/gen Z’ers about “learn to go WITHOUT and save save save and squander your time so that you NEVER live and HAVE FUN or TIME FOR HOBBIES! my bet is that your parents did that and they survived just fine while also raising your ungrateful spiteful ass (not including any type of health issues they might have picked up from such long hours/shitty working conditions) so why can’t you just L E A R N to do the same you precious spoilt brat!!! because the reality of Real Life™️ is that you can’t have it both ways!!! then you’ll have early retirement guaranteed, hopefully!!! and know that hobbies really are time wasters most of the time ☺️ or at least they were for me!!! and your precious so-called “creative pursuits” most definitely are time wasters. no one needs THOSE.” and so on so forth.

they also had jibes for her bc the asker wanted to start a family at some point apparently… and apparently it’s “much worse” once you have kids. like. thanks geraldine and henry. you’ve just told us how much you’ve resented having your kids/family in one fell swoop. your opinion which you’ve framed as unhelpful, condescending advice is now voided.

like. i don’t know how rhonda or paul or deandra or philip could miss the point so fucking entirely. why the fuck should anyone- nay everyone (bc that’s what they make it sound like)- learn to outsource their busy chores like laundry/house cleaning/grocery shopping or god knows what else- to someone else???? why is that apparently a standard expected to be learnt in the US???

like why the fuck are you so desperate for people not to have free time to do these things (unless of course they live in some of those shitty nyc or other big city apartment blocks that don’t come with individual private laundries in the self-contained flats or a communal laundry on like the bottom floor or w/e for example) frank????

deidre why the hell are you so bitterly hankering about “be grateful that you have it easier than most and learn that hobbies mean jackshit and just sell your soul and time to your boss!!! when will the generation stopping being “me me me!!!” and “work life balance!” and think about the company’s bottom line!! learn that “work life balance” is never important! work like a slave for 50 years and see if your valuable experience is needed then! that’s when you’ll learn that those hours where you were never being lazy, instead of just expecting life to be handed to you, will have paid off!” or whatever other ridiculously toxic capitalist bullshit they were spitting out.

obviously there were FAR MORE people actually supporting the question asker and echoing the idea that the 40hr workweek is now redundant. they were also putting down the opinion/advice piece writer’s advice to the asker….. that was apparently similar to the all the bitter people on the comments saying that the 27yo was just “asking for too much” and had to “learn to suck it up instead of being a petulant and overly selfish dick!!” etc etc etc. we all know the spiel as thoroughly as the macarena now.

because whats so fucking wrong with wanting time to yourself and wanting time to do your busy chores??? why the fuck should i be outsourcing these to other people (unless of course you’re still living at home and your parents are still like “hey what clothes do you need washed i’m doing a load rn” or you have a partner that works from home or has some type of parental leave etc)???? i want to do my own laundry. i want to do my own gardening (ok lawn mowing or tree lopping (if needed) i’d actually outsource bc i can’t lift or push lawn mowers bc they’re heavy af for me or and i obvs can’t use a chainsaw)… but i want to do my own grocery shopping. i want to do my own cooking (although i would consider the meal kit services once i had job that allowed me to afford like $50 a month for one of those meal kits sub services) i want to do my own cleaning.

why, if i lived in the US and not australia, am i just expected to learn to outsource all of these tasks even if i don’t have the money for it??? like why the actual fuck are so many of you so fucking weirdly proud of being absolutely worked into the fucking ground for your “great country” (although this is actually bleeding through to australia too and i hate it); working like literally close to 100 hours a week???

because i wasn’t aware you had to be whatever the fuck his name is from 127 hours and cut your fucking limbs off just to fucking survive a job in either corporate america or just let alone any goddamned job in america….. all so they can supposedly “learn to like working for free and devaluing your worth even more to your employer through overworking yourself and always being available!!! mental health is for those who aren’t built for the Real Adult World™️!!! this person is a prime example of the younger generations being weak and dissatisfied with life so often because of their “oh poor little me!!! care for me!!” act. NO ONE CARES FOR YOU today. stop being so over-expectant/demanding and juvenile!!! only YOU care yourself and you should NEVER expect someone else to pick you up from YOUR bootstraps!!! you’re fucking whiny and conceited babies. the lot of you!!!”

because i honestly don’t know who the fuck would enjoy working 70+ hours week with no time to themselves to do what they enjoy doing…. or enjoy having zilch time to catch up on errands and life admin duties or just general house chores; especially if you’ve moved cities or an entire fucking state/s away from your family and support network. let alone doing the same thing on 40 hours a week.

and on top of everything, let’s not even get started on the time spent commuting to and from work or even commuting for life errands/tasks etc etc- especially if you’re like me and you’re nowhere near the capital city’s centre (ie sydney australia for me) for there to be reliable enough public transport and longer commute times to certain places in those cities (that i’ve bitched about plenty before on other posts on here about work/jobs).

get your head out of your asses warren and viola et al and realise that work life balance is literally NOT ASKING FOR MUCH and is asking employers to just have basic respect for their employees time if they work fulltime. it’s literally detrimental to ones health if they have to sacrifice what feels like (or what is literally like) their entire fucking existence to their employer just for meagre pay and just to fucking survive.

because i read a heart-breaking article last night from huffpost (posted by buzzfeed on fb) about a woman in the US who literally hid her having a second baby from her employer for an entire fucking year (literally the entire pregnancy and birth of the baby and the first 6 months post pushing the baby out) during the pandemic all because she was scared she would get demoted or lose her leading of a project and lose her bs “temp” job which had really turned into full time work although the employer never said anything about it being actually full time hours or whatever…. and plus the lady herself was apparently to scared to ask to be put on the books fulltime too for some weird reason.

like honestly. fuck capitalism. fuck thinking that “work life balance is just too hard for employers to add and regulate. it’s an excuse and ploy for workers to be unprofessional, unproductive and lazy!” or whatever the fuck. everyone deserves time to themselves to pursue their interests/hobbies and busy chores/life admin. no one deserves to waste their entire life working 70+ work weeks for those employers who literally have no respect for their employees personal lives and time.

and particularly during the time that is the pandemic as we’ve seen so many companies having to learn to wholeheartedly embrace working from home and more flexible schedules for their workers. worklife balance is absolutely fucking beneficial for everyone involved.

america fix your bullshit work ethic right now lmao.

#life #about me #shut up ilona #ilona’s job hunting thoughts and woes lmao

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redhairedfeistynerd · 4 years ago

Text

A Very Bucky Thanksgiving

Bucky Barnes x reader, singledad!Bucky, Riley and Piper Barnes, Steve Rogers

Summary: This is the first year Bucky has invited someone special to join in on their Thanksgiving dinner.Will everything go smoothly?

Warnings: some swearing, some sly sexual conversation, teasing, some humour

Word Count: 3K +

A/N: I originally wrote this piece for Canadian Thanksgiving but here we are! I hope you enjoy another moment with the Barnes family.

For as long as his girls have been in this world, Bucky has been passionate about baking. He figures this came to fruition when his ex-wife started spending more time out of the house and preferred being away on business trips than building a life with him and their young girls. As their relationship slowly deteriorated, Bucky found solace in pastries, cookies, and breads. Navigating his way through forums and how-to videos online, searching for recipes like he once hunted for his latest mission.

His girls had requested their favourites for this last-minute weekend celebration. Pumpkin pie with maple cream, pumpkin walnut scones, and a new treat he was testing out today, pumpkin spiced doughnuts with maple salted glaze, and for his sweet lady friend; a pecan pie.

Bucky could smell the doughnuts before the time reached zero. The soft smell of cinnamon and sugar wafted through his two-story house, reaching him while he tidied up the bathroom from the girls attack on it early that same morning. Wiping down the counter, he flicked off the light, bounding down the stairs to the kitchen as the last seconds wound down on the timer. Oven mitt on, doughnuts pulled out of the oven (he was trying out a baked version this time) he had about an hour before the girls would burst in the front door after a day of shopping the holiday sales.

The weekend plans had changed at the last minute, his ex (Jackie) had cancelled on the girls again. The girls were to fly up to their mothers' cabin in Whistler, B.C. for a Canadian Thanksgiving but a last-minute job had come up and she chose that over her kids.

Bucky was not impressed by her choice. Riley rolled her eyes at the news and muttered “big surprise” when Bucky relayed the message to his youngest daughter.

Jackie always chose work before their daughters. Her new husband had more importance to her these days.

Her influencer status has skyrocketed after she left Bucky, leaving him high and dry to raise the girls. He didn't see it as an issue though, he loved his girls and if he had to do this on his own, then that's what he would set out to do. His Avengers status pushed away a few years before, he found that he was calling Steve a bit more during those earlier years. Sometimes he needs a break, to sit in a quiet room where Riley wasn't screaming at the top of her lungs, which would have Piper in tears. There was something magical about Uncle Steve though, maybe it was his rich voice, whispering sweet words to Riley to ease the screams to a low whimper. Maybe it was the way he sang the sweet songs of the 40s to stop the tears flowing from Piper's bright blue eyes. Whatever it was that Steve had, Bucky was extremely thankful for.

One of their first Thanksgivings without Jackie, had both girls sick with the stomach flu. He'd never seen anything as disgusting as what his young girls were dishing out.

Blood, wounds, and other violent memories had nothing on this. Who knew little people could cause THAT much mess?

Bucky was exhausted. Riley had finally fallen asleep on the couch and Piper was sprawled out in the master bedroom on his bed, resembling a starfish.

With one last swipe of the kitchen counter, Bucky tossed the rag in the laundry basket and released a sigh of completion. Turning on the hood fan, he turned off the track lights and walked towards his daughter who was now snoring lightly on the couch, when a soft knocking came from his front door. Puzzled, he turned away from his sleeping daughter and made his way to the entryway. He opened the door to Steve's smiling face.

"What are you..."

"Nat phoned and gave me the heads up that you were literally drowning in shit."

"Language," grumbled Bucky as he opened the door wider to let Steve in.

Steve chuckled and took a good look at Bucky. "Man, you're looking a little rough around the edges."

"You would too if you were knee deep in dirty laundry and had two goblins that were puking so much, they make that scene in the Exorcist look tame.

Steve scrunched his nose and tried to shake the memory of that scene out of his head. The previous year, Bucky had invited his old team over for a horror movie night while the girls were spending the night with their mom. Steve still hadn't forgiven Bucky for subjecting him to that movie. "Absolutely disgusting."

Bucky grunted and shut the door, Steve following him from the entryway and up the stairs to the kitchen.

"Here, Nat made some soup for you and the girls, if they are feeling up to eating it,” Steve said holding out the package.

“Oh ya, thanks. I’m sure the girls will appreciate their Aunty Nat making her famous soup,” he nods his head in thanks before muttering “hopefully it's not pea soup,” and walks across the kitchen.

Steve watches as Bucky tucks the soup away in the fridge, noticing how stringy his hair has become and when he looks his way, the dark circles are around his eyes. “Hey Buck, why don’t you leave the tidying up to me and you go take a shower, relax a bit.”

Bucky shuts the fridge door and looks at Steve. “Are you sure you want to clean up this cesspool?” He asks as his arms waving to point out the mess around the kitchen.

“Yes, I’m here to help you out, all right?” Bucky nods and pats Steve on the shoulder on his way up to the bathroom.

Steve manages to tidy up the first floor of the house, shift Riley from the couch to her bed, and fold a load of laundry. He’s pouring hot water into a mug when Bucky walks back in, looking like the shower did its job. “You want a cup of tea?” He asks Bucky when he sit down at the kitchen table.

“Please, a cup of something black so I can keep my eyes open for a bit longer. You feel like watching a funny movie? I feel like I need a good laugh after what this week has been like.”

“Sounds good, how about you go on down and put something on, I’ll bring the tea and some snacks for us,” Steve replies and pours a second mug full of water.

The men settle in and watch a classic comedy, quiet laughter sailing out of both of their mouths, trying to be quiet while the girls sleep. Steve decides on a second movie and they watch until they fall asleep on the couches.

Bucky wakes up, his stomach twisting, and the pain, THE PAIN. "You've got to be fucking kidding.” He lurches off the sectional and runs to the bathroom by the laundry room.

Steve wakes from the sounds of his friend slamming the bathroom door, the unmentionable sounds have Steve pulling his pillow over his head. When he moves it away several minutes later, all he hears is silence. Steve gets up from the couch and makes his way to the bathroom, gently knocking on the door. "Bucky? Are you alive in there?"

"Fucking kill me, please,” he begs and Steve hears his best friend heave again.

Steve camps out at the Barnes household during that Thanksgiving weekend. There is no turkey, no pumpkin pie, or a dysfunctional family fight. Everything is quiet as Bucky careens himself in his bedroom while Steve manages the rest of the household. He keeps the girls busy and out of Bucky’s hair for several days; visits to the ice cream shop and to the park near their home, keeps them smiling and giggling while their dad is at home, miserable in bed.

Steve sits back on the park bench and admires the colours changing all around him; the leaves sway from left to right, falling gently down to the ground. Piles of brown and yellow sit before him, raked into tidy piles. He gets and idea, something to cheer Bucky up the last few days of having the stomach flu. He calls the girls over and tells them his plan to make their dad smile. He makes a video of them, jumping in the leaves and throwing them around, their laughter warming his heart. When the girls have finished frolicking in the mounds of colourful leaves, he takes each other their hands in his and begins the walk back to the house. He’ll send the little video to Bucky in the morning when he heads out and back to work.

Bucky still smiles at the memory of that little video. He can now smile about his treacherous first Thanksgiving as a single dad but he made it up every year that followed; this year, he has to make up for what his ex has left behind. Riley is pressuring him to make her mom's famous stuffing (he laughs at this because this is a recipe that she took from a cookbook he had from his mom) Piper has decided that Bucky is THE WORST because he is going to kill an innocent turkey and all she wants is for him to save one (and yes, he does donate to a local farm that saves turkeys later in the week) and have it live the rest of its life, in their backyard. He notes that she will have a plate of vegetables tonight and he has no idea if that is sufficient enough for a teenage girl who that is 15.

“Cranberries sauce”

“Check!”

“Water chestnuts.”

“Check!”

“Wait, what the heck are water chestnuts for, Pop?”

Bucky is sitting on the kitchen floor sorting through the pantry and about to answer when he sees you creeping into the kitchen, hiding behind his oldest, about to scare her. Her arms wrap around Piper and she squeezes her tightly expelling a high-pitched squeak.

He will never get over how beautiful her smile is when her eyes meet his. His heart beats so fast that he’s afraid she will be able to see it pounding in his chest.

The flowers she is holding scream fall – oranges, yellows, and reds – the cute Chinese lanterns that she adores, wobble back and forth as she walks towards him. She reaches for him with her free hand and pulls him into a tight hug, whispering “you look extra handsome today, soldier.”

“He got his hair trimmed for you,” Riley shouts from the top of the stairs and watches as her father’s face turns as red as the Gerbera's in the bouquet. She snorts as she walks down the stairs at Bucky’s embarrassment and hops down the last few steps to pull y/n into a hug.

“Hi sweetness, I missed your smiling face,” Y/N says into Riley’s strawberry blond curls.

“Missed you too. Are you ready for your first Barnes Annual Canadian Thanksgiving?” Riley asks while rocking on her feet.

Y/N looks at her, “Is it any different from the other Thanksgiving I would be having?

“Well duh, this one if full of maple syrup, poutine, and never-ending skits by Bob and Doug Mackenzie!

Bucky bursts out laughing and poor Y/N is looking between the two of them, lost when it came to the last item. “Okay, okay, Ri, leave the poor woman alone. Here love, let me take those flowers and put them in a vase.” Bucky squeezes her waist gently, taking the colourful bouquet from her hands. She follows him to the cabinet housing the vase and sniffs the air.

“What’s is that smell? It’s so-

“Delicious?” Riley adds as she passes by Y/N and hops up onto a bar stool? “Your taste buds are in for an incredible treat. Dad is the best baker this city has!”

“Pretty sure I’m not hun, but thank you for boosting me up a bit.” Bucky’s cheeks changing in colour, somewhat embarrassed by his daughter's compliment.

“Oh, come on dad, that’s why all the moms are always swooning when you join the bake sales,” Piper chirps in.

“The moms swoon over your dad? I’m pretty sure that has more to do with his-” she’s cut off by Bucky shoving a Snickerdoodle in her mouth. Squinted her eyes at him and waving her finger as if she’s promising to get him back later. He can’t help but smirk and squeeze her side.

“Shhh, my sweet. Don’t be telling my girls how irresistible I am,” he whispers into her ear and kisses it.

Riley makes gagging sounds from behind her dad and Piper’s face turns red from the affection their father is showing Y/N. This is the not the first time they have seen their father with a woman but this specific woman has done something to their father. He’s smiling, he whistles while he bakes, and he’s happy.

Y/N turns to face Riley, “Oh kid, are we embarrassing you? Making you feel a little queasy inside?” She walks over to Bucky as he arranges the flowers in the vase and loudly kisses his cheek and laughs. “How about that Ri?”

“You’re the worst,” Riley chuckles and grabs the serving spoons to put on the table.

Bucky pulls Y/N into a hug and kisses her lightly on the lips. He can taste the Snickerdoodle and it makes him wish he could fully indulge but he restrains, knowing that tonight they’ll have time alone once the girls head to their rooms for the night. He brings his lips to her forehead before taking the flowers to the table and placing them in the centre.

“All right ladies, let’s get this show on the road!”

“Don’t you mean Barnes’, Assemble!” Piper asks with a smirk on her face. Bucky just shook his head, a big smile across his face.

“Tell me where you want me, Barnes,” Y/N said as she looked at Bucky, his smirk telling her that where he wanted her was not in the kitchen.

“Turkey is in the oven, that weird Tofurky thing is in there too, I need to add the water chestnuts to the beans, the pot of potatoes needs to boil, and in a bit, we can get the rest of the veggies going too. Who’s good with making gravy?”

“I hope you made stuffing for me that isn’t in that bird, dad,” Piper said, giving her dad one of her teenage looks.

Bucky slides a bowl across the counter to his oldest so she can see the stuffing he made; animal free. “It’s vegan sweetie, I hope you like it,” Bucky responds. “I found this recipe online, some popular blog.” He watches as she scoops a bit of the warm food in her mouth, and can’t help but chuckle when a groan of satisfaction spills out.

Y/N can’t help but take a scoop for herself, a squeal of delight escaping her mouth. “Shit, Barnsey, you’ve been holding back! Where have you been all my life?” She laughs and walks back over to him, wrapping her arms around him and going in for a quick kiss. “Let’s get this show on the road! All pots on boil!” She shouts and turns the last pot on.

The Barnes family and their first-time guest are indulging in their feast within an hour. Nothing but chewing and soft music can be heard at the table. It always amazes Bucky that it takes hours upon hours of work for this one evening and within minutes the food is gone. He’s thankful though; for his girls, for the life he now has, and for you. He wouldn’t change anything. One last scoop of mashed potatoes goes into his mouth and he places his fork down. “So, do you three want dessert now or do you want to digest a bit first?” Riley stands up from her seat and throws her hands in the air. “Roll out the cart of desserts for us to feast upon, father!”

All Bucky can do is laugh, she’s always been the dramatic one and he lives for these moments. “Riley, I haven’t said what I’m thankful for yet this evening but one of those things I’m thankful for the humour you provide in this family.”

“Aww Pops, I appreciate that but can you please just bring out the good stuff?” Riley’s blue eyes sparkle and Bucky pushes his chair in and heads back to the counter where he has the pies and other sugary treats. He brings the doughnuts and pumpkin pie with maple cream out first, leaving the girls to help themselves as he returns to the kitchen to cut Y/N a slice of pecan pie. He places a dollop of fresh whipped cream beside it and carries it to her, his face turns red when he places it before her stating, “I made this especially for you.” A look crosses her face and its one he has only recently seen. He thinks its adoration? Or could it be...love? He’s not sure if it’s either but whatever it is, he hopes she continues looking at him that way. He sits back down across from her and watches as she takes the first bite of pie. Her eyes close and he can see the sparkle in her eyeshadow as the light above bounces off of it. It feels like forever before he hears a sound of approval from her.

“Wow Barnes. I’m going to say this is almost as good as s-

“Well now, girls, how about you start cleaning up what you can and let Y/N finish up her pie.” He tries to pull back Piper’s chair and is met with resistance.

“No WAY, Pops. I want to hear all about how good this pie of yours is. Right, Riley?” Piper looks to her sister, eyebrow raised in hopes that her sister will join in on the teasing.”

“Hell no, I don’t want to hear about the crap these two get up to. Nu uh, NOPE,” she shouts and she grabs a few dishes from the table and heads to the sink to rinse them off.

Dishes away and the leftovers wrapped up, Bucky takes Y/N’s hand and walks with her to his room. Door closed and locked behind him, Bucky finally pulls his sweet lady as close to him as possible. “Happy Thanksgiving, baby.”

“Happy Thanksgiving, Buck.” Wrapping her arms around his neck, she pulls him into a kiss. “Come on Barnsey, there’s one thing you haven’t warmed up yet this evening.”

“Oh, did I forget to warm up your pie because I can head back-

She quiets him with another kiss, deeper than the last. “You know damn well that’s not what I meant. Now, be good a good man and get ready for the real dessert.”

Bucky can’t help but curl up and laugh loudly. His girl knows all the ways to make him laugh and smile, tonight is no exception. With one pull, she is on top of him, where he wants her this evening; where he can be warm within and thankful for everything his life has brought him.

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #steve rogers #single dad bucky #bucky x you #redwrites

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chocolate-parfait · 4 years ago

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Okay, I just got myself a tumblr account to ask for this Ikémen Vampire scenario, because the world needs this. Can you do one where the MC questions Mozart about his song "Leck mich im Arsch" (Ger. for "Kiss my ass" (lit. Lick me in the ass). I just can't imagine IkéVamp Mozart composing something like this so please be creative and do something funny. The song really exists btw. Real Mozart was a savage.

Started off serious, became trashy insults somewhere in the middle

Mozart being asked about his song “Kiss my ass” - ikevamp scenario (TW; mature language)

Thoughts are in italic

Bold AND italic is just me highlighting something

"Ugh, it hasn't even been a week and Sebastian is already burying me with work!" You mentally whined as you stretched your arms over your head. "Collect the sheets, wash the dishes, polish the shoes and wash the tablecloths..." each chore you listed made one of your fingers go up, and as the count reached ten you let out a deep sigh. You weren't even nowhere to be finished. "...ain't mama raise no weak bitch. Better get done with this before Sebastian yeets me into oblivion", you quietly spoke to yourself before going back to your full time slavery.

A lonely figure in the long corridor, you walked slightly bent forward for both the heaviness of the basket you were carrying and the mental and physical tiredness of your untrained body. As you took a turn at the end of the hallway, the lone sound of your footsteps found a companion. A sweet melody, a familiar one you had heard as a child, drifted through the air and waltzed its way to your ears. About ten meters from you there was the music room; you remembered it from Sebastian's tour of the house, but mostly because of the ever-so-friendly white haired composer that threatened you to stay kilometers away from him unless you wanted to be smacked to outer space. You had every intention of listening to him and avoiding any type of unnecessary contact with the man, but right now an irresistible curiosity pushed your feet to the prohibited door.

Was he composing something? Would he let you listen to one piece of his or play a modern-time song if you begged hard enough? somebody come git her she's dancing like a stripper If getting on your knees and throwing the last ounce of dignity you still had out of the window meant getting to witness Mozart's genius with your own two eyes --an impassable opportunity, too taunting to be ignored-- then someone better had to open up their purse and buy you some protective knee pads, 'cause ya girl was ready to crawl all around the mansion to get that P iano performance.

Inhaling some well needed air to get oxygen to your already malfunctioning brain in preparation of what was to come, you left the heavy basket full of dirty laundry and responsibilities behind and gently pushed the door open while peeking in with your head through the opening. As soon as he felt a pair of eyes on his back, Mozart abruptly stopped his magical fingers to turn to you, face contorted in an annoyed grimace.

Mozart: what.

MC: I- uh- uhm,,,, uhhhh- I... um

"Great job, chicken brain. The hero I absolutely didn't need right now"

Mozart: "I- uh- uhm,,,, uhhhh- I... um"...? I understand 15 languages and troglodyte isn't one of them. If you have nothing to say then leave.

MC: wait I-

Mozart: you didn't even knock. Are you really that impolite or did you grow up in a cave or something?

It hadn't even been 30 seconds and you had already been owned so hard not even a burnt Thanksgiving turkey could compare to this level of roasting, but there was no way in hell you were going to give up just for some edgy frail-looking man spouting some insults at you. You could probably smash him to the ground if you wanted, maybe... actually it would probably end with him snapping your neck like a twig, but at least the will to punch him was there.

You were ready to talk back with a savage comeback of your own, but before your mind could send the input to your mouth, his curt tone cut you off.

Mozart: Staring at people is a normal thing for future people? Makes me pity mankind. Get out.

...as kind as ever, the pianist! Kinda makes you want to kick him in the shins but you kept that thought to yourself.

As you were about to leave, two pair of footsteps got nearer to you from the corridor. Turning your head to the side you saw the clown duo making its way to the room, and you knew they were the ones who could provide you with the perfect chance to either succeed in your intent or bring you to a violent death.

Arthur: Oh my, what's happening in here? Is our wolfie making a move on our lovely MC before I can ask her out on a date myself?

Dazai: Good evening, Toshiko-san! Is something the matter?

And if this was your only opportunity, then you were going to use all your cards from the beginning. Mustering the best puppy eyes you could manage, you turned to the couple, and with a slightly whiny tone that resembled a half plea for help, you said:

MC: Ah, Arthur, Dazai-san! I just wanted to ask Mozart if I could listen to him playing the piano but he did nothing but be mean to me the whole time! I didn't even speak a word and he's already told me to leave twice~

Mozart: Which you didn't. So now I'm telling you a third time, leck mich. (=bug off)

Catching your subtle hint and feeling in the right mood to mess with the other fellow vampire, they decided to fan the flames of his annoyance by bringing in the discussion that one thing they knew he abhorred talking about.

Arthur: "Leck mich"? Why, Wolfie, you surprise me! You really haven't changed from your youth days, haven't you? My dear MC, did you know that the genius pianist here wrote a song called "Leck mich im Arsch"? A song about licking bums!

Dazai: Buttholes!

Arthur: Arseholes!

Dazai: Bungholes!

This was NOT the type of conversation you would've expected to have in a house full of historically important figures of such caliber, and foremost you were so close to bursting into a raging fit of laughter that only the scary aura of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart was preventing you to do so. Despite the amusement you were worried the vein on his temple would explode and show you something you did not sign up for.

Mozart: Haven't I already told you not to bring that up?

Dazai: My, what a chilling smile, Wolfie-kun! Keep that up and you'll scare all the ladies away~

MC: pft——— what ladies?

Mozart: What are you laughing about, dumbass

Arthur: Woah, woah, woah! That's not the proper way to speak to a lady, Mozie! Bad wolf, bad!

Mozart: Did you take me for a dog, you four eyed caveman?

The more the snow white haired man was filled with rage, the more the situation escalated into something even more ridiculous , so much that in the midst of it you didn't even mind the recent insult.

But something was nagging you at the back of your mind. Why did someone as much as a clean freak as him write a song about licking ass? Though you realized Arthur probably gave you the literal translation just to be more direct about his bullying, you guessed it still was something pretty vulgar for someone like him. although you had to admit that the gracious idea you had of him crumbled away the second he opened his mouth

MC: I would've never expected someone like you to write such a song...

Mozart: What are you talking about?

MC: Uhm, you know, you're pretty neat, you don't let anyone touch your piano because of their 'filthy hands'... a piece about butts is a bit...

Mozart: I was still young at the time. My humor used to be different from now, people change in the span of 100 years, you know?

Arthur: Sense of humor? I wasn't aware you had one!

Mozart: Ahahah, so very funny, you stupid tratschtante (=gossip aunt)

Dazai: Maa maa (=now, now ; ara ara maa maa), I don't think the song is that out of character. After all, "licking butts" still has the idea of cleaning something, doesn't it?

Everyone: ...

Arthur: ...That was a bit too much

MC: Yeah, it was.

Mozart: Disgusting. This is why I dont like you people

MC: Wait, so can I listen to-

Mozart: Scram. All of you.

#my writing #answered #ikemen vampire #ikevamp scenarios #ikevamp headcanons #ikevamp imagines #ikevamp mozart #Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

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aloesarchives · 4 years ago

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Joji Narushima Headcanons pt:2

This is the first piece for 2021, let’s go! These are mostly self-indulgent headcanons I have about Joji when I reread FOTS.

Heads up: Use of female pronouns

Man, Joji is a whole ass husband. Like legit, if you’re married to this man, you better hold on to him because you’ll have a hard time getting some that’s like him.

Joji always does his share of housework and doesn’t believe only one person should do it. He’ll do the dishes, clean the house, vacuum, keep the bathroom spotless, etc. Damn, this man even can do laundry and fold that shit neatly in the laundry basket.

He also doesn’t mind helping you do these chores too. If you ask him for help, he’ll come help you do them. The laundry basket is a little too heavy to carry to your room? Joji will not only carry it for you but also help you fold the clothes in the basket as well.

Ugh, we stan such a wholeass husband, amazing

Joji doesn’t have a carefree “I don’t care” attitude. It’s more of him being okay with certain situations or is just unfazed by most things. Basically “It is what it is then/ This is cool, I guess”.

With that being said, Joji is 90% down to do anything. Boost it to 99% if it’s with you. Which means you can drag this man anywhere you want and he won’t complain. Whether it’s taking him to the mall, exploring around, or getting groceries, he’ll never protest to you.

Now that I mentioned it, Joji is more than okay buying groceries for you. Especially, when you’re very busy or for convenience. Like when you just finished making dinner and noticed you were running low on a dozen eggs and some vegetables. You know Joji was coming home soon so you called him to ask if he could stop by to get what you needed. He was perfectly okay with it and came home with what you asked. Half of the time, Joji involuntarily goes to the supermarket to get groceries. This mostly happens in the mornings when he’s home and you’re still waking up. Joji knows how to buy groceries, which is a blessing. Mostly because when it’s just a casual trip to the Supermarket, he legit knows what to buy and get for the fridge. He always knows what to get and never anything solely for himself.

You mostly, by which you buy almost all, buy Joji’s clothes. This is because when you first started living for Joji, you took a look in his closet and you dragged him to the mall. Nothing god awful, just more so questionable. You do allow him to have a say and opinion when choosing clothes. But ultimately you have the final say in what clothes you buy for him. Your efforts to give him decent clothes and a style pays off when his colleagues ask about where he got his clothes and he’ll just say “(Y/N) bought this for me.” Many of them know you because you frequently visit Rukoshin so they know who you are. They are in awe about Joji’s clothes because they’re actually cool and look good on him. Longshen and Sei are forever grateful to you for giving Joji decent clothes, while Kentaro, Tsutomu, and Shido are asking where you bought them.

But not gonna lie, you purposely buy him clothes that he’ll like and look good in. Specifically the second part. You always buy him well fitted short sleeves. You say it’ll suit Joji, which is true, but he also looks a little hot and handsome in it. Joji likes the shirt(s) and you get a nice view, a win win situation right here.

It’s the small things that matter to him. Chilling on the couch watching tv, man’s gonna bring you close to him and he got a firm grip around you. A little cold outside? Joji will literally give you his sweater/jacket to you. Fell asleep on the couch? Man will throw a blanket over you and fix your sleep position so you don’t wake up sore. He’ll do that for you.

Joji would straight up carry you to bed and tuck you in. Caresses your cheek and hair, even kissing your forehead. Oh my god lord have mercy on my soul

On the topic of sleep, Joji mostly sleeps without a shirt. He sleeps in sweatpants or shorts depending on his mood and season. Joji is a moderate sleeper, leaning a little bit on the heavier side. Joji doesn’t move a lot in his sleep which gives you the perfect opportunity to either sleep on top of him or hugging his side. Joji, however, has a thing where he needs to sleep close to you no matter what. You could be facing away from him when you fell asleep, but in the morning you found yourself with Joji’s arm under your head and the other on your waist holding you close.

But Joji being shirtless and wearing grey sweatpants is a sight for eyes that I would shamelessly stare at. Don’t lie, you would too, come join me sis.

As I mentioned in my previous headcanon, Joji tries to stay out of fighting in general if they are not in a sparring or tournament. (AKA street or unground fighting) But I really mean it when he wants to stay out of it as much as possible. Even when his life is threatened, he doesn’t want to fight. He’ll fight for self-defense purposes but never out of his own reasons. This is due to him not wanting to complicate things with you. Although he is not that very expressive, it doesn’t mean he’s apathetic, lacking human sympathy or understanding. He knows you, and he knows you well. He knows you worry about him when he fights even though you know fully well he can handle himself.(As Joji has won some championships and been in the finals for most of Rokushin’s tournaments and you being there at said tournaments). But he doesn’t blame you though, you don’t like seeing your hubby getting injured or hurt at all. Again, you are fully aware that he is one of Rukoshin’s top fighters but it doesn’t mean he’ll always come out unscathed. You’re not super paranoid or worrisome. You’re just concerned for him, and that is completely normal. It shows Joji you care for him and he doesn’t want to put you through a lot of stress. Plus, you being worrisome/stressed out over Joji never sits well with him so he doesn’t become reckless in order to not put you through that. Plus, Joji has to stay out of trouble because one of Rukoshin’s rules is no underground matches. So he pretty much has enough reason not to do anything stupid.

Again, as I mentioned before in my previous Joji headcanons, you and Joji used to take care of Koga when he was younger. Honestly, you loved taking care of Koga, whether he was young or older. But you had very fond memories of taking care of young Koga. One time, you and Joji took him to the mall because of errands and window shopping. You told them you’ll be back as you had to run into a store to pick up something. When you came out, you saw Koga holding a cute teddy bear while holding Joji’s hand. Turns out Joji has a hard time saying no to his young nephew and Joji bought him that. Well, since Koga was happy you were happy too. At one point, a nice old lady asked if Koga was your son. You replied no and said that he was your nephew. The old woman smiled at you and said you would be a great mother while handing you a bag of freshly made mochi. That interaction has never left you and she wasn’t wrong since Koga loved you so much. And he still does to this day but he will never say it out loud to you.

Koga always called you Auntie (Y/N) and that shit was adorable as hell.

You bet Joji’s wallpaper is you. The lock screen was of you and little Koga smiling. But his home screen, his HOME SCREEN, his home screen is the two of you on your wedding. When you saw this, you asked him why he chose that picture to be his wallpaper. He said you were very beautiful on that day and your smile was something he loved about you. Damn, if you never felt so warm before, here you are.

Joji, for whatever reason, buys you gifts even though you don’t ask for them. Not like buying super expensive stuff or going a spending spree. But gifts, mostly small ones. He came home with a bouquet of your favorite flowers, once in a while he’ll buy you a stuffed animal. But the most notable one was on your first wedding anniversary, he got you this beautiful sapphire diamond accented silver necklace. It was so beautiful that Joji said it reminded him of you when he saw it on a display case when he was at the mall. Bruh, you cried because no one has ever thought about you in such a way. Man, I would’ve cried too. The best part about the necklace is that it matches your wedding ring. So when you don’t want to wear it on your finger, you just put it on your necklace. You mostly do this so you won’t lose your ring and to make others aware you’re off the market. Sis, show that thing off!

See look, Joji loves and trusts you with his whole soul and being. However, he knows there are going to be a bunch of goons and people that just want to bother you, more so during the time of the menjin army conflict. Around this time, Joji was like “(Y/N), I love you but you have to be on guard for a few months until I say so”. Depending on who you’re hanging out with, he’ll ask them to watch over you while he got stuff at Rokushin. Almost everyone in Rokushin knows you so they don’t mind his request mostly because he almost threatens them so. Anyway, you’re likely gonna always hangout with Katsuya. Mostly because Joji and him hangout and are on good terms with each other.

Joji really likes to eat. He loves food so much. Your dates were just you and Joji going to food places and eating there. When he’s hungry, he’ll buy some and call you to see if you want something. Even if you don’t want anything, he’ll buy you a small snack or something. One of your languages of love between the two of you is food.

Joji is extremely caring. There are times where he’s up at night and wants to talk to you but he knows you’re sleeping and doesn’t want to disturb you and your sleep. He’ll check up on you when he gets the chance, not too frequent and not too distant either. One time, you were hungry and it was late in the afternoon. You asked Joji if he wanted to eat out. He said he was free and you two went on your escapade.

When Koga was training with Joji, you would visit and check up on his progress. Depending how bruised and beaten he is from sparring, you patch him up and bring food for the two of them.

The reason Joji has a thing for biting was when he was training in the mountain he fought a bear. And the only way he defeated the bear was by biting it really hard. So that’s why he keeps mentioning biting to Koga. But he also likes biting something else if you catch my drift.

Joji got nice hands. Sure they’re rough and have some callousness, but they are warm and nice. Like when you hold his hand, it feels so nice. When he’s caressing your waist, head or cheek, it just feels so comforting and it hits differently.

His hugs are so nice, they are so good.

Joji is more on the receiving end of affection then giving it. Not like he won’t hug you or hold your hand. It’s more of him going with the flow and reciprocating back at you.

Joji likes being close but never is clingy. He knows you got your things to do and he doesn’t want to restrict your time. He knows when to give space.

Sometimes, Koga will ask you what you saw in Joji and you have been married to him for at least a decade. The only thing you tell him is how Joji has treated you and that’s the only answer you give him. Koga is clueless but you tell him he’ll understand when he really thinks about it. But not too much to damage his own brain.

Joji is such a good husband, loving, caring and respectful

King shit 10/10

#kengan ashura #kengan omega #joji narushima #koga narushima #kengan ashura headcanons

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