#I do NOT want Gabrielle to beat the shit out of me actually

[loz-the-noob]

Chat does anyone know where I could buy a.this. I need it. Immediately.

[graneymar]

HII can you do a jealous neymar? Thank you!

#9. NEYMAR: JEALOUSY JEALOUSY

SUMMARY: Neymar is getting jealous because one of his friends seems to like you a little too much

WARNINGS: none

PAIRING: Neymar x fem!reader

"Oh God, that guy, Gabriel Medina, he’s literally so hot! Have you already met him?", Nessa, my best friend, asked and held up her phone, a picture of Gabriel on her screen. "Yeah, last time we were in Brasil I've met him a few times. He's really nice", I told her as I prepared Neymars favorite salad for him. He would be home from training soon. "I am having the biggest crush on him, literally. Next time you're going to Brasil and get to meet him you gotta take me with you", she insisted, "Why have you never talked about him before? I usually know when you're hanging out with Neys friends." The moment she finished her sentence, my phone lit up. An instagram notification. Speak of the devil and he appears. Gabriel replied to my insta story.

"The weather in Paris looks shit, you better move your ass to São Paulo soon 😏 jk. Tell me when you're here again tho!"

I never really knew how to react to Gabriel acting this way. Was he actually flirting or just trying to be nice and funny? I knew most of Neymars friends and none of them acted like this, at least not around me. I glanced up at Nessa and handed her my phone, "That’s why I prefer not to talk about him - at all." Nessas mouth fell open as she read the message. "Y/N, he obviously laid his eyes on you! Does Ney know about it?" I shook my head from left to right quickly. We were together for nine months now, but I still didn't feel good about talking negatively about one of his closest friends. Plus, Gabriel meant a lot to him, I didn't want to be the reason their friendship would come to an end. "Neymar doesn’t know anything about it and I don't want him to know, at least not yet", I answered her question and heard something drop onto the ground. I slightly turned my head to find Neymar standing in the door frame, his training bag on the floor next to him. His eyes said more than a thousand words. He must’ve heard us. "Hi babe, how was training?", I rapidly put on a fake smile to hide my shock. No reaction from his side. "Uhm, I made you your favorite salad! Are you hungry?" He watched me for a few seconds, my nervousness rising, before he finally spoke up. "I don’t know about what? What is it that you don’t want me to know?" I gulped, my heartbeat skipped a beat. Nessas eyes kept on wandering between us until she decided to get up from her seat. "I'll just leave you two alone", she shyly said, "Have a nice day!" And with that, the front door was closed behind her. Neymar still stood in the door frame, his eyes literally looking right through me, the silence in the room was unbearable. "Are you going to tell me what you’ve been talking about now or do I have to find out another way?", he said, his voice calm yet mad. I bit the side of my cheek, not sure what I was supposed to do. I unlocked my phone and went on instagram in order to show him mine and Gabriels chat, but I got cut off in the middle of doing so. "Seriously? You're going on fucking instagram now?", Neymar raised his angry voice. My body twitched at his tone. I put my phone onto the kitchen counter and pushed it to Neymar, Gabriels message already visible. I followed his eyes reading every word, but I wasn’t able to read his facial expression. He then took my phone and scrolled through the chat, reading about how Gabriel called me beautiful, saying I should come back to São Paulo, sending me songs and a lot of - mostly shirtless - photos of himself. "Block him", he suddenly said. I looked at him in disbelief. "Ney, he’s one of your best friends. Don’t you think it’ll be awkward when I see him again after I blocked him?" He handed me back my phone and looked me straight in the eyes. "Who says you’ll see him again? I won’t let that bastard get near you." I shook my head from left to right, "Don't talk about him like that, he’s still one of the closest people to you."

"You really think I'll act like everything is alright after this son of a bitch tried to get to my woman? He better pray to God I won't see him next time I'm in Brasil. He really thinks he can pull whoever he wants with his sparkly eyes, adorable smile and bodybuilder body. Always acting like Mister Charming and being oh so funny. You can try to pull whoever you want, but not my girl." I tried to hold it back, but couldn’t stop myself from quietly giggling. He looked at me all confused. "What’s so funny?"

"Is someone getting jealous?", I playfully raised my brows at him. "Me? Jealous? Of who?", he replied, trying to deny what was obvious. "I quote: his sparkly eyes, adorable smile, bodybuilder body." Neymar shrugged. "So what? I'm still better. He doesn’t even come close to me." His lips were pouted and his eyes wandered to the ground as he was speaking. "Aw babe", I started, positioning myself right in front of him and wrapping my hands around his neck, "You are the most attractive, truly the most handsome man I've met in my whole life. No one makes me laugh like you do. You make me the happiest and I couldn't imagine a better boyfriend than you." I smiled and kissed his lips gently. His facial expression softened as he placed his hands onto my waist. "Just block him, ok?"

"Your wish is my command", I nodded before pecking his lips once more.

[candaru]

just gonna ramble about some Ultrakill/Portal crossover thoughts don't mind me

(considering The End of All Known Land canon for these thoughts, i.e. a world where Gabriel and V1 are the only ones to get out of Hell)

Chell hates robots with all her soul and would try to fucking annihilate V1 if she thought they posed even a sliver of a threat but V1 would be so fucking excited at the prospect of another human. like obviously if they were still in a situation where they needed blood, they'd kill her without a second thought, but now? they're just FASCINATED by the question of "how did a human SURVIVE" and they want to know everything

V1 inner monologue: oh boy a new sparring partner!!! wow they have a cool new kind of gun I've never seen before!! that would've been soooo helpful back in hell. I wonder if that's how they escaped? and they're quiet just like me! I wonder if their organic voicebox is broken? or do they just not have one? can humans not have one?

GLaDOS would fucking despise Gabriel because he's sooooo full of himself. She doesn't even need to hear him say anything robot-racist, She's already decided She hates him and wants him dead. an "angel?" yeah, right. sounds just like another human ripe for the picking. let's see how high-and-mighty you are when you're in my TESTING DOMAIN! DO MY PUZZLES, BOY!!!

Gabriel is like wow this robot is stuck up and has some serious issues but also I am uncomfortable with how much of myself I see reflected in her. hmmmm. yeah I'll try your puzzle, tell me more about your deep-seated hatred of organics and particularly this one that keeps ruining the facility you run and is the only one to ever beat you in a fight. mhm. yeah so quick question have you ever thought about trying to fuck—

(EXPLOSION AND GUNFIRE)

meanwhile if Chell ever met Gabriel on the surface it'd make for such a good tense encounter. bc she is hiding behind a tree in full fight-or-flight mode wondering "how did another human SURVIVE" and also second question "how did they get such sickass wings and where can I get a pair?"

and then Gabriel noticing her would ALSO send him into fight-or-flight mode but only for a moment because of the pure shock of, again, "HOW DID A HUMAN SURVIVE" before curiosity completely overtakes him and he tries to talk to her. trying to get her to talk and not attack or run is like trying to coax a wild injured animal out of a hiding spot. but he eventually manages to earn the barest, most minimal amount of trust by setting down all his weapons and leaving offerings of food in front of her.

...this gets harder when she sees Gabriel and V1 together and registers that they're allies. she's unsure if they're plotting against her or if V1 is manipulating Gabriel. eventually she leans towards the latter and thinks her fears are confirmed when she witnesses them drawing Gabriel's blood while he's sleeping.

she tries to communicate this to him by drawing crude pictures on the ground and is VERY FRUSTRATED when he's like "omg can you not talk? that's ok!! V1 also can't talk but we make it work, they're really incredibly kind and patient and—"

Chell, internally: I AM GOING TO KILL THAT FUCKING ROBOT AND SAVE YOU

I think it would be funny for V1 to try and go urban exploring in Aperture. GLaDOS is initially all excited because a new testing robot literally fell right into Her clutches but then V1 proceeds to be the most stubborn, impudent, tenacious piece of shit and they remind her WAY TOO MUCH OF CHELL so now She's trying to kill them but they have ACTUAL FUCKING GUNS and Aperture is being destroyed in the wake of their battle

meanwhile V1 has decided they don't like this robot but also She makes fun tests. so they do puzzles until they get bored and then they blast holes through the wall and try to kill Her

something something Ultrakill is just Portal for NBs (everyone knows Portal is for women) and I'm so fascinated by the similar dynamics of the toxic yuri/toxic yaoi robot-and-human pairs. and I think they would mostly hate each other and I love that for them.

(also something something GLaDOS is too far gone, too corrupted in Her immortality, and too deep in denial for any possible healthy ending with Chell—it's just not possible. so seeing Gabriel and V1 in a healthy and loving relationship would make Her SO FUCKING MAD for reasons She can't articulate)

[melanieph321]

Gabriel Medina x Reader - Untamable Part 4/8

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Reader spends the summer with her first love, Gabriel Medina, for him to get a chance to know their three year old son. However, both Reader and Gabriel struggle to keep their feelings at bay.

Enjoy!

"He's calling....again."

"Let it ring." You groand.

Vavó entered her living room with the homeline in her hand. "I think he's just making sure that you haven't left São Sebastião yet."

"I told you Vavó, we're not leaving you. I want to stay here and help you with the house."

"If you say so, querida. But right now you seem to need more help than my house."

She was right. You were a mess and embarrassingly so. Gabriel had gotten under your skin without even trying.

"Fine, give me the phone." You held out your hand, asking for it. Vavó handed it to you and stuck around for the drama that might unfold.

"Yes?"

"Y/N?."

"This is her."

"It's me, Gabriel."

"Yes, I know the sound of your voice, Gabriel. What do you want?"

The weight of his sigh blew in your ear. "I've been calling you for a week now. Why haven't you picked up?"

"I've been busy...helping Vavó with her house."

Vavó chuckled from where she stood. You were a terrible liar.

"So you're still in São Sebastião then?"

"Yes, Gabriel. We're still here." It broke your heart a bit, hearing the angst in his voice. Little did he know that the last thing you wanted was to take Nemo away from him. The whole point of this summer was for Nemo to finally know his dad. To know him for all he was and all he could be.

"I was thinking...." Gabriel said.

"About what?"

"About this whole co-parenting thing."

"Oh."

"Yes, it has to work. For Nemo, I mean."

"For Nemo?"

"Yes, we have to get along for him."

"I....agree." You sighed.

"Good. Because I understand that you hate me. I mean, you have every right to after all I've put you through."

"Gabriel, I don't—"

"But we shouldn't let our feelings for each other affect what is best for our son, meaning what happened last week can't happen again. Ever."

There was a loud thud in your ear. It was either the beating of your heart or the beating of Gabriel's. Nevertheless, you were left speechless.

"If we ever disagree on something, anything, we have to work it out right away. With words." He emphasized, acknowledging without scrutiny, that your actions last week had indeed been childish. This level of accountability and maturity humbled you.

"Hello, Y/N. You still there?"

"I'm here." You pressed the phone to your ear.

"Good." He chuckled. A soft chuckle. "That's good."

"Why is that good?"

"I dunno." You imagined him on the other end of the line, running a hand through his wavy hair. "I guess I was a little afraid that you packed your bags and went back to São Paulo."

"Gabriel." You pinched the bridge of your nose, feeling guilty as ever. "I would never leave without telling you. Nemo would be so upset."

"How is the little guy? I hope he's not up to no good."

"No, he's alright." You chuckled. It was a nice feeling, laughing with Gabriel. "He's actually out playing in the backyard. Some of the neighborhood kids are teaching him how to fly a kite."

"Hey, I wanted to do that."

You bit your lip, everything inside you screaming. Don't say it, don't say it. "You should come over. Nemo will be happy to see you." You immediately looked to Vavó, who stood with her arms crossed and eyebrows raised.

"Shit, I can't today."

"Oh." His words hurt more than you expected. Followed by a prickly sensation beneath your eyelids.

"Yeah, it's my friend's wedding. He's getting married tomorrow, but Rico and I are leaving for the venue tonight."

"I see."

"But hey!" Gabriel's voice sparked through the phone. "You should come with us?"

"I...I should?"

"Yes, you and Nemo. Please, you have to come, my friends would love to meet him."

"Right...meet Nemo."

"Yes. It'll be perfect. I can pick the two of you up tonight, and we can all go together like a—"

"....Family." You nodded.

"Yeah, a real family."

It's all you ever wanted and now he wants it too. How could you say no?

"Yes. Okay. We'll come with you to the wedding."

"You will?" Gabriel sounded like he had shot up into the air. Or at least that he was bouncing up and down. "That's great Y/N. Rico and I'll will pick you up around eight. And anything you need, like money for a dress, just let me know and I'll send it to you."

The phone call pretty much ended there, with Gabriel offering to pay for your dress. But only when Vavó asked, "What did he say?" Did it all hit you.

"Erm...Vavó. I think we need to go shopping."

"What?"

You nodded. "Like, right now."

********************************************

Not only were you in need of a new dress, you also needed new shoes, a haircut, a manicure, and a tuxedo to fit a three year old boy. To think that you got all of that done by the time Gabriel came to pick you up was a miracle.

"Papa!"

His car pulled up to the house, with Nemo running down Vavó's driveway, dragging his little suitcase behind him.

"How is my little fish?" Nemo tripped on his feet. Fortunately, Gabriel caught him just before he fell.

"Good, papa." Nemo giggled.

"Yeah? Are you ready to go to a wedding with Papa and Uncle Rico?"

Nemo nodded his head, then pointed back towards the house. "Look at Mamãe."

You came down the driveway, dragging your own suitcase alongside you. On your feet were a new pair of heels you wished you had broken into earlier. The walk from Vavó's house to Gabriel's car might have been the most painful walk you had ever experienced.

"Y/N?"

Looking up from your feet, you saw Nemo in Gabriel's arms. Gabriel, who looked a bit lost as he stood, gaping at you, his mouth left wide open.

"A little help, please?" You groand.

"Erm...of course. Sure." He came to your rescue, helping you with the suitcase, while Rico put Nemo into his baby seat.

"Thank you." You said, flickering a strand of hair that irritated your eye.

"You look good." Gabriel tilted his head, watching you curiously.

"I do?" It was probably the haircut. Other than that, you looked pretty normal, you thought. Except for the high heels, of course.

"Yes." He muttered. "Did you do something to your hair?"

"I actually got it blown out this morning. But I might have over done it."

"No, no." He assured. "It looks good. You look good."

"Thank you, Gabriel. " You felt the need to complement him too. He was dressed so casually, though, a t-shirt and the usual baord shorts. But he smelled like a dream. You were drawn to it, his scent.

"Do you wanna ride shot gun?"

"Huh?" You batted out of your trans.

"Shot gun?" He smiled. "Or do you prefer sitting next to Nemo in the backseat?"

"Erm...no. I can ride shot gun."

"Great, I'll tell Rico to move over."

It was a nice little road trip. You were headed just up the coast where Gabriel's friend had booked out a resort by the beach to host the resption of the newly wedded couple.

It was no surprise that a lot of people at the resort knew Gabriel. People, guests of the resort who didn't even know Gabriel personally, came up to him and patted him on the shoulder, congratulating him on his recent successes as a surfer. Adults became children, begging Gabriel to pose for pictures or a quick video to someone's beloved back home, all while holding up the line in the hotel lobby.

For a moment, you got a glimpse of what it felt like to be Gabriel Medina, where even at someone elses wedding venue, he was the spectical.

"We should get the bags to the room. Maybe unpack." Gabriel said, who was a handed a keycard from the reception. Both he and Rico had previous reservations. You, on the other hand.....

"I'll share with Rico." Gabriel said, handing you his key in the elevator.

"Where will you sleep?" You asked.

"With Rico, of course. Right Ricci?"

"Right." The buff man muttered. Rico had given up his seat for you in the car and now he was giving up his hotel room. You felt so sorry for him.

"It's okay." You said, handing Gabriel back his key, to which his eyebrows furrowed. "It's okay." You nodded. "Nemo and I will stay with you."

"With me?"

"With him?" Even Rico was flabbergasted. Although, he seemed more worried than surprised.

You shrugged, Nemo bouncing in your arms. "We're a family, aren't we?"

Gabriel looked to you, a sly smile on his lips. "We are."

"It's settled then."

The doors to the elevators opened, and you went ahead, leading the way to your room. You waited for Gabriel to catch up with the keycard while Rico slipped into the room next door, but not before whsipering the words "Good luck." to Gabriel, who dismissed his laughing friend.

You had no idea why Rico found this predicament so funny. However, you did see the irony in the whole situation as a queen-sized bed stared back at you upon your entry into the hotel room.

"Shit."

"What?"

"There's only one bed." The rest of the room was lovely, with glass widows for walls giving you the perfect view of the sun setting over beach.

"Had you expected there to be two. I only booked the room for myself." Gabriel said.

"No, but at least for the bed to be king-sized. The three of us won't fit on the queen sized one."

"Oh." He scratched the back of his head, appearing rightfully confused. At least he wasn't freaking out like you were. "Do you want me to go down to the reception, see if they have another room available?"

"No it's okay." You waved. "We'll only cause them trouble."

"Are you sure? I'm certain that they'll arrange it for us." Gabriel said, with a sense of security that only a person with his level of fame could have.

It never occurred until later in your relationship that Gabriel was of importance. That a lot of people would go great lengths to keep him happy. To you, he had just been Gabriel Medina, your first love.

"It's okay Gaby. We'll figure something out." You said.

He perked up, eyes widening.

"What?"

"You called me Gaby." He said, not even attempting to hide the boyish grin on his lips.

"Yeah, and? I've always called you Gaby."

"Yes before, but then you stopped."

"I did? When?"

You didn't have to ask him when, you already new the answer and so did Gabriel. Perhaps that's why he chose silence as his answer. A good choice, since it allowed the smile on his face to linger.

"I think Nemo needs to stretch his legs from the car ride." You muttered. "Will you take him for a walk before he goes to bed?"

"Sure." Gabriel picked him up from the floor where he was playing with your rooms. Do not disturb sign.

"Hey buddy. How about a walk with Papa before bed?" Nemo yawned in his arms but still brought himself to nod his head. "Alright then, let's go." Gabriel looked to you, a wink of his eye. "Well, be right back."

The two of them left you to unpack your suitcase, and only then, while folding clothes, did you acknowledge how fast your heart was beating. Beating for Gabriel.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

[angelshizuka]

I think my main problem with Gabriel in the show is that at it’s core he keeps proving over and over again he loves Emilie more than he loves Adrien.

He attempted to akumatize Adrien (the only reason he couldn’t is because Adrien suddenly felt better) and the show gave us two examples that if Gabriel ever found out Cat Noir is actually his son, he wouldn’t hesitate for even a single second to use Adrien as a tool to get his wife back.

Thanks to the s5 finale not having a Cat Noir and Hawk Moth showdown at all (which is like the literal lowest barest of minimums you’d expect from an arc like this, yet they failed at even that) those “what if“ scenarios are officially the only ones we have, and both of them prove Gabriel’s an awful father.

Even with his “sacrifice“ he didn’t give a shit how it could possibly affect Adrien. At the end of the day Gabriel left his son without a father (and possibly without a mother, it’s still vague wheter the woman is Emilie or Amelie, because apperently even Asstruck can’t make up his mind) and his death wish was to make his son live in a lie of what a “good father“ he was (footage not found).

Side note: I mean death wish as a general thing where people make a final wish on their death beds, we still have no idea what his exact wish for Gimmi was.

That’s probably what moved me so much with movie Gabriel. There it’s a lot more obvious his love for Emilie and Adrien are equal, because the literal second he realized he’d been beating the living hell out of his own son, he stops. He also wants his wife back as much as show Gabriel, but the key difference is in the movie he refuses to do it at the cost of his son.

Obviously the cliffhanger ending scene leaves a lot of unanswered questions, but at least judging on this movie alone, he’s miles better than what they did with his character in the show.

And especially with show Adrien canonically being a sentimonster now and Emilie using the peacock miraculous to create him is what caused her “death“ in the first place, kinda makes me wonder if Gabirel unconsciously hates Adrien because of this, wheter he realizes it or not.

[thebisexualdogdad]

Hmm, hi, I would like to make a request and what if the black cat/Felicia Hardy had a boyfriend who was like, El Diablo from Suicide Squad. (Of course, if you want)

Felicia Hardy x Male!reader

*Tati Gabrielle used as fancast*

● you met Felicia when you attempted to steal her Lamborghini

● “nice try handsome but no one steals my ride” she says strutting up to you in her black cat suit after robbing a jewelry store nearby

● “you're the black cat” you say instantly recognizing her

● “and judging by your tattoos you're the one they call El Diablo and I could actually use your help on a job”

● that job included stealing a dozen imported cars from their shipping containers at the port which you then set on fire with your powers and she promised you a third of what she would be paid from her buyer

● and even better than the money you ended up hooking up after a successful heist

● a couple days later she gets a call from you

● “can't get enough of me huh?”

● “I know you stole my watch Felicia”

● “Guess you'll just have to come get it back from me hot stuff, that is if you can catch me”

● “if you wanted to see me again all you had to do was ask”

● “What would be the fun in that?”

● Felicia's nickname for you is lover boy

● she will tease you by calling you that in front of your crew who have become very accustomed to her being around

● they make fun of you for being so whipped for her

● “you don't even know what that woman can do with a whip, they may call me the devil in the streets but Felicia Hardy is a devil in the sheets”

● she loves tracing your tattoos with her fingers while you lay in bed together

● and telling each other stories of the best crimes you've committed

● you work a lot of jobs together

● and Felicia enjoys making you watch her get hit on by guys at bars you're about to rob blind

● and sometimes the plan includes you making a scene and trying to fight the guy “hitting on your girl” while Felicia gets whatever it is you guys were there for

● she finds it so hot knowing the jealousy is low key real and results in you fooling around in an alley behind the bar/club/wherever the heist is taking place

● there was one incident where a guy got way too handsy with her and you actually beat the shit out of him and set his car on fire

● another time spiderman was able to actually have you arrested

● but Felicia sauntered into the police station with a bag full of money for your bail

● “Y/N such a bad boy you know I'm the only one allowed to put you in handcuffs”

● you smirk at the cops on your way out knowing the charges they have on you won't stick “better luck next time boys and give spiderman my regards”

● you know about Felicia and Spidermans dating history

● you still can't believe she dated a superhero

● sometimes you set fires around the city just to put him to work

● “Felicia can you please tell your pyromaniac boyfriend to stop setting fires for no reason?”

● “sorry spidey but no can do, you're lucky I talked him down from setting you on fire”

● you and Felicia go on plenty of lavish vacations

● and of course committing crimes while abroad

● in your apartment you guys proudly display some of your favorite scores including a priceless painting you stole while in France

● for a little change of pace Felicia was somehow able to convince you to go on a snowy weekend getaway in the mountains

● you're not a fan of the cold

● but you were definitely able to keep each other warm that weekend

[it-was-too-cold-always]

We're Not in CW Anymore - 3

Chapter 1 Chapter 2

The reader gets blasted into another universe - one where Sam and Dean Winchester are real people, real hunters, and really fucked up. To her surprise (or horror), Dean has been getting glimpses of her life in his dreams and is completely enamored with her. It's nothing like the cable-friendly CW show that she knows and loves.

Reader x Dean Winchester

Warnings: language, violence

Chapter 3: The Bunker

The Impala pulled up to the bunker, the car still awkwardly silent. Dean opened the door for you and offered a small smile as you climbed out of the backseat. It was almost comforting. Almost. You couldn’t shake the idea of him watching you undress or take a shit. God knows what he saw. And until you figure out what exactly he’s witnessed, you’re going to keep your guard up.

Sam led you down the corridors of the bunker, which did actually look a lot like the show. Dean followed behind you, making you a little more uneasy. You were suddenly very aware of how tall they are compared to how short you are. Sam and Dean towered over you. They also walked too damn fast for your little legs. Finally you were standing in the main room of the bunker. Unlike the show, the room was bustling with people. There were a couple gathered around a book, a few staring at laptop screens quietly, and a handful typing away on their keyboards. You recognized one of them – Charlie. She had on headphones and was bobbing her head to the beat no one else could hear.

“Right, let’s ask James where to start,” Sam said after clearing his throat. He went over and talked to one of the men reading off his laptop. You could see them talking, Sam pointing over to you. You blushed heavily. Trying to ignore Dean staring at you again, you took a moment to look around the room. You were pleased to see a pretty good mix of people – not everyone was a white man. They were all dressed in business casual, mostly button-ups. A stark contrast to Sam and Dean’s flannel and jeans. You remembered their grandfather thought of hunters as less than – do these Men of Letters feel the same?

“Thanks, man,” Sam said to James before walking back towards you. He shot Dean a look, probably for staring again. “So, he gave me a few books to start off, nothing really concrete. I guess we won’t find out until we start digging.” Sam gestured for you to take a seat at a table in the back of the room. “Be right back,” he said.

Dean stood for a moment, contemplating if he should sit next to you or across. He decided to sit next to you, maybe he won’t be as tempted to stare. He couldn’t help it – he watched you for months, and he couldn’t help but fall for you a little. You were funny, had great taste in music, and killer curves. He liked the way you talked to yourself and sang in the shower. It’s only natural he developed a crush on you. And now he was in such close proximity to you. He wanted to touch you, just to make sure it was really true. You were here, in his bunker, in real life. Not only that, but you were supposedly soulmates. It made his heart flutter a little, though he’d never admit it.

“Do you think Gabriel was telling the truth?” you blurted, breaking Dean’s train of thought.

“Which part?” he asked.

“You know which part. The soulmates part. That’s crazy, right? Soulmates aren’t real.”

He didn’t respond. He didn’t have time to – by the time he opened his mouth, Sam slammed down several books onto the table. “Alright, everyone pick one and let’s get to work.” This was going to be a long night.

After several hours of reading the oldest book you’ve ever seen, you were ready to call it a night. The number of people in the main room of the bunker was dwindling, just like your patience. “What exactly are we trying to accomplish?” you asked, stretching with a heavy sigh. You didn’t see the point in researching soulmates and alternate universes. It’s not going to change anything. Unless they could get you back home.

“If Gabriel worked hard enough to transport you to a whole different universe, surely it was for a good reason. There has to be some sort of explanation besides you and Dean being soulmates,” Sam said, not even looking up from his book. You stole a glance at Dean, who met your gaze. Your eyes silently begged him to put an end to this reading torture and suggest we go to bed. As if he could read your mind, he cleared his throat. “I don’t know man, I think we should call it a night. It’s been a long ass day.” Thankfully Sam agreed.

“Where am I sleeping?” you asked. Surely there was a spare room in here somewhere. “Let me find an empty room. I think there’s one not too far from our rooms,” Dean responded. You were ready to have some time to yourself to process everything that’s happened today. Especially the whole soulmate thing. That was going to take some getting used to. Dean led you to his bedroom, inviting you to sit on the bed while he searched for a room you could use. His room was decorated with various guns hanging on the wall. A picture of him and his mom sat on his nightstand. You walked over and picked up the photo. Dean was a cute kid, and Mary was beautiful. They looked genuinely happy. It was a nice picture.

“Good news and bad news. There IS a spare bedroom, but it’s filled to the brim with boxes of old files. I’m not even sure there’s a bed underneath all that crap.” Dean’s voice made you jump. You were too focused on the photo to hear him coming. You blushed as you set the picture back down – he caught you snooping around his stuff. “Then where the hell do I sleep?” you asked. This is a nightmare.

“How about you take the bed and I take the floor?” Dean suggested.

“I’m not going to make you sleep on the floor in your own room. YOU take the bed, and I’LL take the floor,” you responded.

“I’m not letting you sleep on the floor after traveling dimensions. Take the damn bed.”

“You’re stubborn as fuck,” you sighed. “Okay, we’re both adults, right? We can share a queen bed without being dramatic about it. Just no funny business, or I’ll kick you in the balls.”

He chuckled. “No funny business. I pinky promise,” he said, holding out his pinky finger to you. You took it in yours and immediately felt sparks fly. You both stared at your hands for a moment, half expecting literal sparks coming off your fingers. The electricity you felt off his single digit was intoxicating. You wondered what would happen if you did more than touch pinkies.

He cleared his throat, letting go of your finger quickly. “I could find something for you to wear to bed, get out of those jeans. I doubt you’ll want to sleep in them,” he said as he started rummaging around his dresser. He pulled out a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. “Bathroom’s around the corner. I think Sam set out a toothbrush and whatnot for you already.” You changed quickly, anxious to get the whole crawling into bed part over. That would be the most awkward part, you told yourself.

You walked back into the room, the sweatpants going inches past your ankles like little socks. Dean was matching you with gray sweats and a black t-shirt. You gawked a little. The shirt was tight enough for you to get a peek of the wall of muscle underneath. His arms were toned and muscular. One was covered in tattoos, the other in various scars from fighting monsters all his life. I guess that is more realistic, you thought. The idea of him getting all those scars made you sad, nonetheless. “Alright which side do you want?” he asked. You shrugged and picked the left, crawling under the covers. You stayed as close to the edge of the bed as possible. Dean did the exact same thing, leaving a large space in between you two. You prayed you’d fall asleep quickly, feeling uncomfortable in this awkward situation. Sharing a bed with a complete stranger. God, please don’t let him be a creep.

Chapter 4

Tags 💛

@5tud10-54r4h  @deans-spinster-witch

[resident-idiot-simp]

How do you think 09 v Reboot MW would fair in the SPN verse?

Would be creatures or hunters?

how’d they react to the characters from SPN and in a fair fight who would win?

YOU HAVE UNLOCKED SOMETHING IN ME!

Okay this whole thing is very complicated let's break it down.

First of all I think either could be both depending on the vibe you are going for but here is my first thoughts on it.

22-

Soap: hunter

Ghost: creature (werewolf or vampire maybe)

Gaz: hunter

Price: hunter

09-

Tav: toss up maybe originally Hunter turned creature I want to say vampire..... For Obvious reasons

Riley: creature (I would like to say Wendigo I really would but that might not fit quite in the universe... I'm going to say it anyway)

Roach: creature (Hell maybe he could be a Phoenix that would be very interesting considering they're all dead)

Price: Hunter but like Gordon vibes

React is a good question... There are so many characters I could go on about... Honestly it might be easier to ask about a specific character but I'm just going to do a vague overall. So TFW + Gabriel (because he is the best character)

Sam- He likes all the 22 boys honestly (probably a particular liking in Soap) he probably is just curious about their lives. 09 probably extremely hesitant but even more interested. He hates Price because Price is far too much like John.

Dean- He finds a keen spirit in Ghost and finds Soap fascinating. Hates 09 Price and probably wants to kill Riley. Tav is off-putting and he is confused by Roach and asks him a metric shit ton of questions.

Cas- He really don't care about any of them except for Riley and Roach probably he just wants to understand how they function and why (09) Price isn't dead

Gabriel - He loves the 22 boys and will treat Ghost like a pet. Soap is displeased but can't do shit about it. He finds Soap fun to poke and prod at and likes to call Price a child.

09- He wants to put Riley in a jar and study him. And he is so found of Roach (kindred spirits those two both can't FUCKING DIE) . Tav gets the trickster special because he isn't found of where he is headed and Price is free game to hunt.

(there is more Gabriel because I understand how far better then any other character.)

And in a fight?? That's not really a fair question... Because it's the Winchester's..... They can beat any character in fiction let's be honest here.

Castiel alone bodies. ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ BUT I don't think that's the answer you want. So instead let's break it down.

They both have military tactics they are both honed in their craft. Tactics wise I don't know who actually wins It might be a toss-up. Would I like to give it to the Captain? Yes! Would he actually come out on top? I'm not sure.

Fighting wise again toss up they really are evenly matched in my mind.

The thing is the Winchester's have the advantage they know more than any hunter in the world because of the bunker.

If we're not counting just how overpowered the Winchester's are for the numerous reasons they are not only because God made them that powerful. They are honestly two sides of the same coin so I'm the end It might just be a draw ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

[positively--speculative]

Sorry to make this rant again, but there's more to the gothic genre than just "dark and twisted fucked up stuff." And I think the mindset that it is probably comes from being exposed to it at a time when you're not ready to consume it.

I had several friends and acquaintances in my late teens and early twenties who liked/loved Anne Rice. Only one of those friends recognized how fucked up some of her writing and approach to certain sensitive topics were. When I finally did read Interview with the Vampire and The Vampire Lestat, I found myself waiting for some sort of moment where the writing would make it clear that many situations are, in fact, unsavory and awful...but they never are. Daniel doesn't interrupt Louis about the slavery. Nothing pushes back against Lestat or Gabrielle for the incest. It just happens and the reader just has to accept it. And when you have bright-eyed teens and early twenty-somethings wanting to delve into the subject of gothic literature and vampires without having been introduced to better-written gothic stories, they just kind of accept it and pat themselves on the backs for being able to enjoy something so "mature."

I know I've mentioned Crimson Peak before, but it's amazing how it just...does such a better job at not only including disturbing things but at framing them. No, it doesn't beat the audience over the head to explain why incest and seducing multiple wealthy women into marriage to murder them for their fortunes is horrific. We see things from Edith's point of view, so we are therefore able to fall in love with Thomas just as much as she does, and we can feel her horror when she finds out the truth about him and his sister. Their incest is never romanticized. And the disturbing part is knowing that Thomas has actually fallen in love with Edith--because it shows that someone who has done such horrible things can still have the ability to fall in love with someone and hurt them. Yes, Lucille was pulling most of the strings, but he was not blameless.

Anne Rice's writing, to me, talks down to readers who are, rightfully, disturbed by these kinds of things and it seems to reward apathy. It's like she was giving gold stars to readers who can just consume gross stuff and be unphased. And I kind of wish that her writing was treated as just shock porn rather than reading that challenges her readers intellectually because they really don't do anything to challenge her fans. I'm not begrudging her the "gothic" title, but I will say her gothic books are not really good at all aside from making some interesting characters. And it was because of her interesting characters that I was actually excited when the TV adaptation was announced, but I knew as soon as it was announced Louis would be Black that Rice's fans were going to be on their shit.

I think it says a lot that the show created a better gothic story than Rice ever did, and I think a lot of white fans resent it for that, because the show is asking them to think and be challenged in a way Rice never did. Even the ones who claim to like the show resent Black fans for "bringing race into everything" when one of the show's most central themes is race and racism. Maybe it's mean to keep saying they have the media literacy of a peanut, but there's no way to talk about this adaptation *without* bringing up race. But I really don't think they get that, because they're used to racism just happening (again, Louis was a racist slave owner in the book) without being made to pause and examine it.

[timeshift-playground]

uhm ultrakill hc talk (V1 and Gabriel edition)

guys did you know i like ultrak- *explodes*

\\also slight suicide mention

-🪷 (Adrian)

VERY LONG POST so the rest is after the cut

V1:

Runs digitigrade

The heels on its feet are actually the jet boosters that let it dash

maybe has small wheels built into its feet to help it slide. maybe. i swear i don't just want the murder robot to have heelies

weird fucking insect THING

Any idea of affection and human actions it has learned from observing its creators interact. Ex. blinking, twiddling its thumbs, etc

Also the concept of it being capable of mercy is very interesting to me. We see in the ferryman fight that once he stops attacking, V1 does too. The same with characters giving monologues and such. It doesn't attack until it knows the target is a threat, and seeing that everything in hell is like completely hostile we don't really get to see it sparing those who don't harm it.

as for killing i feel like it just doesn't feel anything. It doesn't have satisfaction it's just doing what it has to to survive, like a wild animal. I think it's going down through hell not only out of hunger but also curiosity. I mean it probably consumes a lot of blood to run its systems at the capacity it does so. Things like the cybergrind serve as practice when it gets bored (also it def replays its favorite fights)

As for dying i have two ideas

It leaves the pools of blood instead of collecting them for a reason. Once it is destroyed it can absorb blood from the ground to put itself back together. This of course takes time, which is why the enemies and bosses come back after you die. Meaning it's immortal

Hell itself brings V1 back each time because it wants entertainment, maybe resetting time too??? This doesn't really make sense to me tho

Gabriel:

gifted kid syndrome and BADDDDD

Shapeshifter. I don't know why. He has a human form (i refuse to believe he'd be white) and a more angelic form (his head is just a biblically accurate angel

immortal with his light, but can be exhausted with enough harm (ie. first fight)

his wounds heal extremely fast, but the more exhausted he gets the slower he heals (this is why he can taste his blood in the second fight)

this guy. oh my GAWD. Daddy issues times 10000000. Nice chill dude but indebted to his job because the council. I think he had a good friendship with minos before he had to kill him. Secretly played organ and read stories to filth children he didn't think belonged in hell (such as those who died to suicide). The only angel who really dared to step foot or even worry about Hell, so the council used his faith as a tool to manipulate him. This is a majority of what drives him to kill the council after the second fight

Now GabV1el, this shit is so canon.

I don't think they're really a romantic pairing, and it's very likely one sided on Gabriel's side. Gabriel is just enamored with V1 because it's the first thing to ever give him true struggle. Killing Minos? Easy. Killing Sisyphus? Easy. Killing the council? Easy. But V1 just keeps beating him. It's a passion to overcome, to finally beat this machine. And I am not normal about it AT ALL

As for V1, I feel like it doesn't understand the concept of romance. Things like kissing and embracing are just an action like any other to it. Although it may find the concept of affection interesting when all contact with others has always been harm

[depressed-teacup-inc]

At this point, I am literally just trying to see this season to an end

Hi hello, yes I’m late, time to review Revolution! Let’s go because at this point I’m getting tired of this show.

So basically the entire episode is Adrien’s trying to tell Marinette that he’s leaving Paris and trying to stop it, but Marinette doesn’t really listen, and is focused on stopping Chloe, who’s now mayor/dictator??? Yeah trust me the logic of this show is gone, somehow people are ok with the super demonized caricature Chloe being mayor like everyone didn’t hate her already (my guess is that this is supposed to be alluding to the current state of world and politics and lack of trust people hold in the government)? Love the lack of consistency and logic.

Now. I don’t want to criticize Marinette too much, because technically, yes, she was busy trying to handle the Chloe situation (which in itself makes absolutely no sense and by all accounts shouldn’t be possible) but I will note that despite Adrien clearly telling her something was wrong multiple times, she never seems to care or understand? Like he told her multiple times that there’s something wrong, but she never seems to care or do anything about it until it actually affects her (which is unfortunately in character)

But apparently people are criticizing Adrien?! Saying how he’s awful for lying to marinette about having to leave and left it for the last minute? And frankly, the show kinda does it too (in the next episode, many of Adrien’s classmates discuss how awful it is Adrien didn’t say anything and how could he keep this from them like that)

LIKE??? BITCH??? Two points:

1. Adrien’s dad is Gabriel fucking Agreste?!

Like wow what a shocker the child of a man that has proven to abuse and isolate his son on multiple occasions has a fear of asking others for help in his situation because he worries nothing can truly beat this actual billionaire who’s also his legal guardian? And also is implied to have legit magic control powers over him, sentimonster style?

2. This really isn’t that of a big fucking deal

Like I do not get why this show keeps saying how “Adrien lied to marinette!!! He didn’t tell her he’s moving away!!!! How could he!!!” And how literally everyone and their mom is seeing this as an awful situation for marinette, when in actuality, all she knows is that Adrien will now be living a couple of hours away from her (due to the bullet train between Paris and London) and that he won’t literally be with her every second of the day.

Like I get it for a 14 year old yes this might be a huge fucking deal, but Alya even says so herself! Adrien is in London, they’ll just get a couple of tickets for the train and figure it out from their! And even in the worst case scenario where Adrien stays in London, there’s the option of a long distance relationship (that’s just as valid a relationship as any and would be a refreshing take on how not every relationship is super conventional and in person)

I just really don’t understand why the show shows Adrien genuinely going through some horrible shit from his father (like full on white room torture in the episode after) and then all the show focuses on is how this affects marinette and how sad she must be rather then the genuine psychological damage this must be doing for the kid! Like no one in this show remembers the amount of control Gabriel has on Adrien or something.

Anyways rant aside, before the entire going to London thing happens (btw congrats adrienette shippers for the kiss) there’s a whole thing where Chloe makes a deal to be akumatized by Monarch so she can send people to detention (it’s painted as a torture chamber but it’s literally people walking around with a video of Chloe saying they’re ridiculous, so basically P.E. Class), and then there’s a big fight where Ladybug and Chat Noir almost detransform because they used up their lucky charm and cataclysm and are trapped (btw the lucky charm had no fucking point to the story, why was it underwear? Frankly it was kinda creepy if the writers to have panties as the lucky charm for nothing but a weird joke, and not even connecting to the messages of unity and everyone taking action but ok)

But like… they just don’t?! Like I swear to god this show makes no sense anymore, Ladybug and Chat Noir just say they’ll never give up and fully transform and recharge again, and now they have no time limit and full powers?!

Like, the entire principal (just like Gabriel said) of the miraculous time limit, is that Kwamis need to recharge after one use, and that adults can lend some of their energy and power to Kwamis and therefore have them last longer to the point they don’t need to detransform, hence “only adults don’t need to detransform”

But now it’s apparently a purely emotional thing and not physical? Ladybug and Chat Noir somehow grew up by saying they’ll never detransform again (I do not at all see how this is a moment of growth to them) and now they just don’t detransform, despite the fact they are physically still kids?

Like by the shows logic of emotional maturity, Gabriel shouldn’t be able to hold a transformation at all then, because he’s the farthest thing from emotionally mature.

And also, it kinda makes all the stakes in fights now null and void? The biggest stake and challenge in each fight from day one of miraculous was “there’s this bad guy, you guys have one chance to use your special powers to beat them, think smart and solve this puzzle” but now it’s just gone??? It would have worked if the akumas overtime became more intense and hard to beat but clearly that’s not the case as even akumas powered up with actual miraculouses can be beat by a normal ladybug and chat noir.

The best thing the show could have done here is rather then make the becoming adult thing emotional maturity, have Ladybug and Chat Noir notice their transformation seems ti be slowly lasting longer as they age (have it be a metaphor for puberty and growing up or something) and then actually make the fights and villains more difficult and compelling so by the time Ladybug and Chat Noir no longer transform back, the priority isn’t for them to keep their secret identity (which sucks and anyways doesn’t matter) but to stay alive!

But anyways I digress, when has this show ever pulled a logical move?

Which speaking of…

I have no fucking clue what they’re doing with Chloe anymore.

They spent. Entire SEASONS! PLURAL! SEASONS! After the introduction of Audrey Bourgeois, telling us how “no Chloe is irredeemable her actions are never justifiable she’s just evil and bad and she has no other reason for doing anything and she’s so bad she’s cooperating with monarch and Lila look how evil she is hate her so marinette looks better in comparison”

To now… suddenly pulling this scene?!

Like. WHY??? Why would you purposely demonize Chloe despite the very real opportunity she had to get better and be complex, only to now pull a “whoops wait look guys deep compelling character!”

And while I heard people say this is the show maybe finally making Chloe get her redemption arc after hitting rock bottom, I can’t agree? The show is known for its repetitive nature, and if the show is to redeem Chloe and suddenly make her a good person or give her a compelling reason for acting the way she did, marinette looks bad in comparison, for not having as compelling reasons to do just as bad things:

Example? Marinette and Chloe in season 3’s Animaestro, trying to sabotage Lagami and publicly humiliate her in front of Adrien so she won’t “win him over”.

If Chloe has an explanation for this behavior (she’s taught to be cruel and mean from a young age by an abusive and neglectful mother, and because of her equally neglectful father, she learned the only way she’s heard and anyone cares for her is if she lashes out, and someone will just throw money on the problem) what reason does marinette have? She was raised by perfectly loving and doting (maybe too doting) parents, who from day one have taught her to be kind to others, and to do good.

Both characters did an awful thing, just one character has a genuinely compelling explanation for said behavior, while the other is pure jealousy and wanting the guy for herself by all costs.

So no, I don’t think the show will redeem Chloe for that reason: because it would force marinette to admit her wrongdoings and therefore force the plot to develop!

So this just makes no sense? It feels like a case of the show wanting to have its cake and eat it too, wanting the show to remain the same, Chloe to remain awful for no reason, and for marinette to stay the hero by comparison, but also have the bragging rights to say “we write complex character you guys!”

It makes no sense is my point.

Anyways besides these huge inconsistencies, leaps in logic, and bad writing, I don’t really have anything else about this episode to say? This show has officially come to the point for me where I genuinely think nothing will ever change or be able to fix how wrong everything is (from characterization of everyone except for marinette, the plot, the rules of miraculouses, the LOVE SQUARE)

[winepresswrath]

I do gotta say tho, even tho I’m mad at aziraphale because he’s being a terrible boyfriend like what you said about the “I forgive you like” because WHAT. But also I really like the way the show really demonstrates the underlying cruelty of heaven and it’s angels. Really shows the hypocrisy of a group of beings who are supposed to do good, especially aziraphale who really buys into the heaven propaganda, who hurts people, particularly the person who means the most to him. Because like you said he fully just takes advantage of that devotion Crowley has for him. Insane, this shwo makes me INSANE

I missed this anon and yeah! The angels were one of my favourite parts of the season, and I think the strongest element aside from Neil Gaiman deciding he's just a simple man who wants to put his otp in situations. They are deeply awful and I kind of love them. They are the exact kind of moralizing hypocrites who are callous and cruel precisely because they think being on team good means everything they do is justified and it's actually impossible for them to be in the wrong (they're angels! is it even possible for them to do the wrong thing?).

but!! To me, they also seem like they're basically kids? Obviously they're not literally children, but there is this very consistent reoccurring joke about how childish/sheltered/immature they are. Muriel is the most obvious example, but the archangels come off like bratty twelve year olds to her sweet little kid.

Gabriel is basically teenager in love flipping off his family as he runs away with his backstreet guy. Uriel is constantly picking at Michael, Michael is playing at being in charge like it's a game, and it's ridiculously easy for both Aziraphale and Crowely to trick them obvious half assed lies. They're not allowed to ask questions! The Metatron treats them like badly behaved kids out past their curfew. At any point an old man with a beard may pop up to scold them and send them home, and they're all scared of doing something wrong by his standards and getting in trouble with this guy who is pointedly not God but who lines up exactly with the pop-culture idea of god the father, and who offers Aziraphale, among other things, a respite from the hard work of figuring out what the right thing to do is for himself. It's fine! You don't have to question the belief system you were born into or make a painful break with everything you've ever known! Aziraphale has had six thousand years on earth to grow up, but the other angels have been sitting in a sterile white box playing "i'm not touching you" games with each other and filing paperwork.

And I think that's extra interesting because this season also really emphasizes:

Heaven has Institutional Problems

Aziraphale isn't the only angel who's unhappy in heaven. Gabriel and Muriel were both completely miserable. They just didn't understand that they were unhappy because they'd never experienced anything else.

Angels who aren't Aziraphale can change and grow! There's very explicitly Gabriel being changed by love and Muriel growing up a bit on earth, and from a more fan-theory angle there's also Jimbriel, who I think is probably basically Gabriel minus the war and six thousand years of playing referee for Michael and Uriel while unleashing an assortment of plague and calamities on earth because that's God's will! Buck up champ.

We also get Gabriel and Beezelebub talking about how their underlings basically live for Armageddon, "if you can call that living." This is so bleak. They've all been on a six thousand year time out just dreaming of the day they get to beat the shit out of each other until they feel better, but it won't work because eternity is just more of the box.

Anyway I think it's going in a distinctly eden adjacent direction. Aziraphale is going to tempt those angels with knowledge and the capacity for change. I have veered so far from your ask anon i'm sorry you're right heaven really went all out on sucking this season & while Crowley and Aziraphale are both fucking it up Crowley refrains from being spectacularly cruel to Aziraphale about it and Aziraphale should learn to return the favour. I forgive you!! I forGIVE you. I forgive YOU. "you can be an angel again" is actually a worse thing to say than "you're a demon. i don't even like you." when he finally picks crowley over heaven i'm going to lose my mind.

[caltropspress]

RAPS + CRAFTS #33: Gabe 'Nandez

1. Introduce yourself. Past projects? Current projects?

Gabriel Matias Fernandez Traoré aka Gabe ‘Nandez. Past projects in chronological order - H.T., Sifu, Disconnected, Plaques (a compilation), Cliquetape, Diplomacy, Grove, Ox, Seven, Strife, Canis Cascus, Pangea, H.T. III, H.T. III (Deluxe), Object Permanence. Upcoming projects - False Profit produced by Thomas Maggart, a collaborative album with U.K. rapper Louis Jack, and more.

2. Where do you write? Do you have a routine time you write? Do you discipline yourself, or just let the words come when they will? Do you typically write on a daily basis?

My desk, at home. If I’m not at home, then any desk. Or something desk like, if available. I tend to write at night and during twilight, generally speaking.

And yeah I try to write every day, and usually do. That being said, I ultimately need a few days off after writing every day for an extended period of time. But that in itself is also part of my writing process, it’s holistic.

3. What’s your medium—pen and paper, laptop, on your phone? Or do you compose a verse in your head and keep it there until it’s time to record?

Pen and paper always. I’ll take walks and write bars in my head but it all comes together when I pull the pen and notebook out.

4. Do you write in bars, or is it more disorganized than that?

I write in bars, it’s all organized. Scientific. 

5. How long into writing a verse or a song do you know it’s not working out the way you had in mind? Do you trash the material forever, or do you keep the discarded material to be reworked later?

Depends. Sometimes I’ll write 32 bars and decide I don’t want to use them after all, but that doesn’t happen often. I haven’t trashed an entire verse in a minute, there’s usually always a few gems in there that I can re-purpose. If I do trash something forever, it’s usually like…four bars in. Might read it back later and go “What the fuck was I on here?”

The first two lines tend to dictate everything. The first two bars cannot be trash. That’s the headline, it has to be strong because it sets the tone for the entire verse. I make sure the first two work and then it usually stays good from there.

6. Have you engaged with any other type of writing, whether presently or in the past? Fiction? Poetry? Playwriting? If so, how has that mode influenced your songwriting?

Honestly, the text messages I’ve sent women read like straight poetry sometimes. Like I’ll structure them like a poem, stanzas and shit like that, with rhythm and shit. I’m not even trynna come off like Casanova right now, I’m just being honest. Those texts are romantic as fuck and I’m proud of them. 

I’ve had to mess around with other mediums during academia but haven’t done so since I left. 

And ultimately I consider what I do with this rap shit poetry. Not crazy about labels but I’d still classify my writing as that.

7. How much editing do you do after initially writing a verse/song? Do you labor over verses, working on them over a long period of time, or do you start and finish a piece in a quick burst?

There usually isn’t much editing involved and I rarely trip over finishing stuff once I start it. I might take a long time to actually start the verse though, the first two bars. So I’ll just listen to the music for as long as I need to until the first two bars come to me, and then it’s pretty much smooth sailing from there. Usually. Every song is different though.

8. Do you write to a beat, or do you adjust and tweak lyrics to fit a beat?

Ideally, I tailor the writing to a specific piece of music, but I’ve transplanted verses to other beats before, definitely.

9. What dictates the direction of your lyrics? Are you led by an idea or topic you have in mind beforehand? Is it stream-of-consciousness? Is what you come up with determined by the constraint of the rhymes?

It really depends. There are general themes in my life that dictate the themes in my art, and I can just go stream-of-consciousness while sounding topical in my creative universe on any song. Sometimes a specific thing will inspire me, like my song “Commerce God” for example, which was inspired by the god Hermes/Mercury, and riffs around the statue of Mercury on top of Grand Central Station.

10. Do you like to experiment with different forms and rhyme schemes, or do you keep your bars free and flexible?

I would say both.

11. What’s a verse you’re particularly proud of, one where you met the vision for what you desire to do with your lyrics?

Good question, and a hard one. I’ll say “Ox” 'cause it’s the song of mine that’s reached the most people so far. I think it’s cause it has a balanced amount of depth and flexing. That beat goes crazy too. Stars just aligned on that one.

12. Can you pick a favorite bar of yours and describe the genesis of it?

“Self emancipated from a place of permanent ruin” is one that comes to mind. It’s a comment on how I kicked narcotics and alcohol but also sounds real fly and rolls of the tongue well. 

It’s from a track called “Semtex.” Wrote that one in like half an hour off of no sleep at 5:00AM type shit . Always fond of those type of sessions.

13. Do you feel strongly one way or another about punch-ins? Will you whittle a bar down in order to account for breath control, or are you comfortable punching-in so you don’t have to sacrifice any words?

I’m cool with punching in 'cause I’m good at it and can make it seamless. Or at least seamless enough where I’m cool with it. But there are times where I know I can just one-take a section of a song, so I’ll do that.  I’m with whatever needs to get done to get the song recorded, and the procedure is never exactly the same. It’s all very instinctive when I’m in the booth.

I’ve one-taked an entire song before, my song “Up Top.” First take, one take. That was crazy. But I don’t go in there planning on doing that. That just happened organically.

14. What non-hiphop material do you turn to for inspiration? What non-music has influenced your work recently?

Old books and stories. Theology, mythology, some philosophy. From different cultures. 

Otherwise life. People, the interactions I have or have had with them. Dreams sometimes.

15. Writers are often saddled with self-doubt. Do you struggle to like your own shit, or does it all sound dope to you?

Self-doubt isn’t something I struggle with in general. All of my music is objectively great because it’s tediously well made. I might cringe at some of my old stuff, but I don’t at most of it.

16. Who’s a rapper you listen to with such a distinguishable style that you need to resist the urge to imitate them?

Off top, Prodigy. But, to be honest, I’m at the stage where I’ve found my voice, so I don’t really run into situations where I’m writing and go, “Nah, that’s his shit.” It does happen sometimes, but it’s rare. 

Sometimes I’ll throw a dart in someone else’s style on purpose as an homage.

17. Do you have an agenda as an artist? Are there overarching concerns you want to communicate to the listener?

I’m here to express myself through art. By doing so, my viewpoints are shared, my energy is felt. This action, in turn, communicates the essence of my being and my spirit, which does what it’s intended to do, according to or regardless of my intention. 

I can’t control how someone is going to react to an action I take, let alone how my art is going to make them feel. I’m confident that I can direct and influence accurately - I’m confident that we all can. But, ultimately, I don’t have a desire to sway people in a particular direction, through art or in everyday life. That’s up to people.

RAPS + CRAFTS is a series of questions posed to rappers about their craft and process. It is designed to give respect and credit to their engagement with the art of songwriting. The format is inspired, in part, by Rob McLennan’s 12 or 20 interview series.

Photo credit: Sebastian Thompson

[jennyandvastraflint]

Xena Reactions S2Ep6

A BABY

Uhhhhhhm.. Xena? No wait, is that Diana from S1?

Yup.

Urgh not Joxer again... Guy's delusional

"You know, I don't remember it that way"

YES PULL HIS STUPID NOSE

"That's Xena's reputation you're playing with."

Whatttt did she just shove between her boobs... 😂

Well that guy looks sus

"We need to work on our communication" AHDDHDHDHDHDBDBDJDJD JENNY AND VASTRA BE LIKE

"He thinks you're in love with him" 💀

Uhhhhhh... Wtf is going on? Don't throw Gabrielle in the dungeon hellooo!?

Oh yeah that guy is sus

PLEASE HOW MANY LOOKALIKES ARE THERE....

Sjdbdbd runs into the chair

She's hilarious.

"Big-mouthed idiot... Maybe it means something. Maybe I'm gonna kill her."

"If he captures me, he'll shove splinters under my fingernails anyway" Yes, exactly

"My name's Agus"

THAT'S Xena

She's gonna- yup, she punched both of em

"I want your heart" "You're not my type" HEHEHEHE

She's so done with men.

Sdhfhd please did she put glue on it

They really said "Hey Lucy, here's three roles for you"

Oop. Table broke.

HER FACE. Also Joxer.....

"Don't make me hurt you" is shoved to the ground

Oh no this is gonna be uncomfortable

Please no. Stop spreading lies that Xena is STRAIGHT.

"And it's shdffhds"

JOXER DON'T FUCKING ASSAULT THE PRINCESS

"How'd she get out here?" *shrug*

OOP. She already switched

"Pft. Impossible. But you're just her type." Gabrielle knows what's Xena's type

"I'll do the decent thing." "Leave?" sjdhfs

FATHER AND MOTHER TO GABRIELLE, NOOOO 😭 Joxer that level of DELUSION

Rwar rwar 🤮 please stop

"Are YOU SUICIDAL" SHFDH

But Agie is a cuter name

Gabrielle is really pissed.

"You're trying drive me insane" Did she just shove Joxer shfhdd

"If you come across a woman who looks like me and she displays ANY interest in you whatsoever, that's bad."

NOOO THEY CAUGHT GABRIELLE :(

Or is it actually Xena... How many of these outfits do they have

"A cold bottom isn't fatal..." 😂

Oh yeah it's Xena

Which makes me repeat the question. How many identical outfits do they have?

Uh oh. They stole the baby.

AND she beats him up again. He deserves it.

"She'll be a victim of some more circumstance once I get my eyes on her"

OUCH she's nasty to Gabrielle...

This is 👀

"My father died in childbirth" mpreg? 👀 No he got drunk and fell off the roof

Awww... Poor Meg has shit parents

"I should STAB him" sdhfhd

Ahahahaaa, she's getting the baby handed that way.

Joxer........ Ffs

If Xena weren't skilled for five, Joxer would be dead eight times over

Yay, Meg!

Joxer is so fucking annoying...

"I don't care what you've done in your past life, if you do good now, you are good."

NOOO THE BABY

He died :(

Dianaaa!

Thaaat's Meg

Please sdhdhs The same fucking scene three times

Baby is so chill

Gabrielle FITEEE

please the baby shdhd

Pfffft he's still alive, he was just napping

"Yeah you're a softie" That's not a bad thing

Awww, the king wants to talk to Meg

OMFG SHE'S EMPLOYED AS THE COOK!!! Slayyyy

"Learn to read so I can write to you"

SJFJDHDHD NOOO SHE'LL LEAVE THE KITCHEN DOOR OPEN

Please Joxer, just leave.

[cherubchoirs]

Your fubky headcanons and art have captivated me

Now I wonder, does everyones favorite little gopro cook for gabriel?

can you believe this is a long answer...CAN YOU BELIEVE IT...(thank you for asking me this i needed to talk about it!!!!)

TY!!!! and YES actually bc i've....i've thought about it. i really enjoy v1 attempting to show affection and being completely shit at it because there's not a single byte in a single microprocessor that knows anything other than killing in that massive brain. BUT since that brain is massive it WILL overheat it trying to think of how to show love when they're not beating the shit out of each other. eventually it gets the bright idea to research in the remains of lust (its memory of humans is very scrambled, and i think its interactions were limited with them anyway), where it's able to collect a few ideas that it never would have come up with in a million years of iterating. and one of those is cooking. it can't eat but it could make things. and share them!! and so it starts data collecting (HARD when it can't read "non-pertinent" information properly) and finding out what gabe likes (easy to do, it asks a million pointless questions a day). i think gabe likes salty and sweet foods, particularly floral or fruit flavors, so it starts with that in order to make him something. it has to try doing this several times bc v1 is...hard on things, smashing a few kitchens in lust before it gets just gentle enough to not break every bowl it's using and the oven. it still goes too fast and ruins many more attempts by rushing before it's finally able to produce something it can actually give to gabe. i think it's simple, like a honey cake, because its brain has a hard time processing a procedure like baking/cooking, and it's definitely a little burnt because it cranked the oven BUT...it made it. it thought about him and it did something entirely contrary to its programming all on its own for him. it's probably not even that GOOD esp not compared to what an angel would normally eat, but it’s v1 showing him care, showing him attention, showing him that it wants his happiness. and you know he's gonna cry about it.

[brainddeadd]

BRAINDEAD REVIEWS

THE WALKING DEAD: Season 5

Overall thoughts

They’ve been on the run and fighting for their lives for so long, they’ve forgotten how to exist peacefully and without fear - without the suspicion and without feeling like everyone and everything is out to get them 

S5, ep 1

‘Then’ THEN WHAT 

BEFORE THE WORLD WENT TO SHIT ???

WHOS SCREAMING 

Were they forced into being pieces of shit at Terminus ????

‘Now’ ok 

They gassed them ?!?!?!?!

THEY GOT THE KID FROM THE HOUSE IN SEASON 4 

They gonna chop them in half or something ?????

THEY SLIT THE KIDS THROAT

IMAGINE SURVIVING A FUCKING ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE JUST TO HAVE SOME DICK SLIT YOUR THROAT 

And now the place is being blown up

Jesus christ 

CAROL NO

TURN AROUND 

“Bitch looked like a weapon with a weapon.” You’re correct but don’t you dare call her a bitch 

Carol not believing a word that dick says - queen shit 

“Horrible shit just stacks up..” You are the horrible shit man 

ITS CAROL BLOWING THE PLACE UP 

HELL YEAH 

Carol I love you 

On fire zombies.. well shit 

Rick what a man 

WHAT 

THE 

FUCK

ARE 

THESE 

PEOPLE 

DOING 

JESUS 

CHRIST 

The shit from all the people they’ve killed - the teddies from children 

LEAVE THE BABY OUT OF IT FUCKER 

Eugene is full of shit 

100% full of shit 

CAROL AND DARYL HUG 

YES

REUNITED AT LAST 

HIS CRYING AND PUTTING HIS FACE ON HER SHOULDER 

OJSDNFJDENFKDS

WNDFJKDN

DCJNWRIJVNAEUIVRSKVWAPIREJNDV

REUNITED

YES

That’s quite a group they’ve got 

Who the fuck took over terminus tho???

“You’re either the butcher or the cattle.” Yeah but y’all chose the wrong cattle this time 

S5, ep 2

“Will you have us?” Dude you’re her family 

Daryl just.. being there for Carol, knowing what she needs, accepting that she doesn’t wanna talk about it 

WHAT WAS THAT

WHO WAS THAT 

“We surrender.” He’s so funny man 🤣🤣🤣

Not Daryl being confused that the Pastor is puking after seeing them kill walkers like pookie not everyone is like you 

Gabriel - I don’t trust him

The loyalty to Rick is amazing 

Gabriel is too scared to not be hiding something 

Bob, this is the world now. It’s not gonna get better. Eugene is full of shit. 

DROPPING THE WATER AS HE’S ASKING IF SHE WANTS HIM TO CARRY ONE OF HERS 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 HER LIL “hmm no” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 that was 100% a blooper they left in 

“It was a stack of boxes.. and a mop.. and I tripped.” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

‘YOU’LL BURN FOR THIS’ well fuck 

Where is Bob going 

Tara thank you for telling Maggie the truth 

Oh damn Rick ok slay 

THE CAR THAT TOOK BETH 

Who the fuck

What the fuck

Its the Terminus fucks 

EATING PEOPLE 

PARDON

OH MY GOD

THEYVE TAKEN HIS LEG

OH MY GOD

“If it makes you feel any better, you taste much better than we thought you would.” HOW IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER 

S5, ep 3

I’m still reeling from the fact that they’re cannibals 

“You join us or feed us.” That’s not much of a choice buddy 

Gareth wanting Carol - gonna have to go through Daryl and me first buddy boy 

Bob losing his shit laughing because they’ve just eaten him when he’s been bitten - karma 

There’s the ‘A’ again - what the fuck does that mean 

I get Abraham wanting to leave but come on man, Eugenes full of shit 

Gareth is a fucker 

HE SHOT OFF HIS FINGER HELL YEAH 

They got what they deserve 

MAGGIE AND GLENN LEAVING NO

DARYL

Where’s Carol?

Who ?????

S5, ep 4

Beth ?!?!? 

In a hospital ?!?!?!

Police ?!?!?!?

“So you owe us.” FUCK NO

WHAT 

THE 

ACTUAL 

FUCK

THE BODY DOWN THE ELEVATOR SHAFT 

Ok yeah I kinda skipped the rest cause I don’t really like Beth - but ik wack shit happens to her 

S5, ep 5

Eugene is so full of shit holy fuck 

Who the fuck is beating the shit out of someone ???? Pls don’t let it be Rick 

ABRAHAM - flashback ??? Yep 

“Really need some ass first.” Why would you.. don’t.. no yuck.. ugh men 

FUCK EUGENE 

He put crushed glass in fuel line 

Oh god what was the fire truck keeping locked away 

Yo what the fuck is going on in Abrahams past 

He is Insane 

“I’m not a scientist!” THE FUCK YOU MEAN BOY

OH 

I 

FUCKEN 

KNEW 

IT

EUGENES A PIECE OF SHIT 

Fuck Eugene 

S5, ep 6

They really want Beth back 

A woman’s and children’s shelter that Carol went to 

Daryl stopping her from killing the walkers of people she probably knew - doing it for her and burning them 

Whos following my people around 

“Looks like a dog sat in paint and wiped its ass all over the place.” 🤣🤣🤣

I love the way Daryl says ‘stop’ when someone’s (Carol’s) saying funny shit and he doesn’t wanna laugh 

“You don’t know me.” “Yep. You keep telling yourself that.”

Is that the dude from the hospital?? The one that tried to help Beth escape ??

Daryl taking a child abuse survivor book, I love him 

THE VAN

ON THE BRIDGE 

SHIT 

“It’s like you were a kid. Now you’re a man.” 

“We ain’t ashes.”

“I already helped you once. It ain’t happening again.” Damn ok 

THEY JUST RAN OVER CAROL 

SO NOW THEY’VE GOT BETH AND CAROL 

OH THEYRE FUCKED 

S5, ep 7

I still don’t trust the pastor man 

Maggie pulling a gun on Abraham when he threatens Rosita slayyyy

Fuck Eugene 

Fuck the guys in the hospital - those cops are shit 

The walkers on the ground that’s a lot in the burnt area 

Don’t hurt Daryl fuck 

Handful of Dixon ass - mood 

DON’T TRY AND FEED DARYL TO A WALKER BITCH 

USING A WALKERS HEAD AS A WEAPON KFNJRNFOO YUCK 

What is the pastor man doing??

Beth being sneaky is not what I thought I’d ever see 

Fucken pastor man 

Why the fuck would you trust the cop you just kidnapped ?!?!? Are you stooopidddddd

S5, ep 8

RICK HITTING HIM WITH A CAR 

I mean.. at least he didn’t let the walkers get him

Maggie and Glenn are back finally

Go get Beth

Beth killing that dickhead cop

Don’t fucken ask for the kid - let him go 

Daryl and Rick squaring up for Noah 

BETH STABBED THE COP

BETH GOT SHOT IN THE HEAD BY THE COP

DARYL KILLING THE COP - shit he’s pissed 

DARYL CRYING

Daryl carrying Beth out and Maggie falling to her knees 

Holy shit 

That.. fuck ok

S5, ep 9

Noah’s family 

Finding his mother like that 

OH MY GOD 

TYRESE 

NO 

GETTING BIT BY NOAHS SIBLING 

Why is Tyrese SEEING DEAD PEOPLE 

Cutting off his arm like that 

Holy shit 

Who the fuck decapitated those walkers???

NO TYRESE NO

S5, ep 10

Daryl don’t eat the worm

Please don’t eat the worm

Oh for fucks sake

He ate the worm 

Y’all can’t die like this cmon 

How they keeping the baby alive ?!?!?

Carol telling Daryl to feel it and then kissing his forehead in what is probably one of the only moments of kindness and gentleness he’s ever experienced is WAY too much for me to handle 

THE WOMAN TIED UP IN THE BOOT OF THE CAR AND LEFT TO DIE 

The feral dogs - good lord what are they going to do 

SASHA KILLED THE DOGS 

THEY EAT THE DOGS 

I GET IT BUT HOLY EW 

Daryl putting the cigarette out on his skin fuck

CRYING NO 

The water being left for them - who the fuck ??

GLENNS SMILE AT THE RAIN !!!!!!!!!!

Carl covering the baby with his hat so she doesn’t get too wet 

STORM 

Bby Carl sleeping finally 

“We tell ourselves that we are the walking dead.” “We ain’t them.”

OH THATS A LOT OF WALKERS 

He cleaned the music box for Maggie 🥹🥹🥹

HOLY FUCK 

THAT WAS A BIG ASS STORM 

Aaron ??

How does he know Rick ?!?!?!

S5, ep 11

Daryl going absolutely insane when Aaron is brought in 

“Audition for membership” the fuck 

AYO RICK 

“Long enough to see that despite a lack of food and water, you never turned on each other.” They’re family dude 

“You can trust me.” They’re running a bit low on trust at the moment buddy 

Driving through the walkers like that is wild 

Why so freaked out over a flare gun ???

Alexandria 

Eric 

S5, ep 12

“We brought dinner.” 🤣🤣🤣 

Don’t mind them, they haven’t been house trained yet 

Deanna and Reg 

The beard really makes Rick look feral 

“I’ve killed people.” Yeah how many now?? 

“Sounds like I’d wanna be part of your family.” me too lady, me too 

“I want you to help us survive.”

THATS SO MANY GUNS

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Carol struggling 

OK WHYD HE SHAVE IT OFF COMPLETELY 

Jessie - Ron & Sam

“I won’t bite.” He might 

“The boy and the baby, they deserve a roof.” Pookie 

GUTTING THE ANIMAL ON RICK’S FRONT PORCH IS FERAL OF YOU DARYL DIXON 

Them thinking that being neighbours is too much distance - staying in one house together 

I love everyones collective shock at Rick’s shaved face 

“And I’m just trying to figure Mr Dixon out, but I will.” I wouldn’t count on it hunny 

Daryl please for the love of God, have a shower 

Rick’s panic - bless him - “I was in the middle of losing my mind.” 

Mikey and Enid 

Oh poor sweet baby Carl - bless you child 

“I didn’t just lose her. I killed her.” Jesus 

They’ve been on the run and fighting for their lives for so long, they’ve forgotten how to exist peacefully and without fear - without the suspicion and without feeling like everyone and everything is out to get them 

“They’re weak. And I don’t want us to get weak too.” I genuinely don’t think that’s possible Carl 

CAROL 

“DEN MOTHER” 

“NICE ENOUGH TO PROTECT ME”

WOMAN 

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

DARYL’S FACE WHEN SHE COMES OUT IN THOSE CLOTHES - MAN LITERALLY FROZE 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

THAT WAS A LAUGH  

“Have you taken a shower yet?” “Mm-hmm.” When? The 80s???

“Im gonna hose you down in your sleep.” Please do. I think he has to smell like a bio-hazard by now. 

“You look ridiculous.” How kind of you Dixon 

Enid sneaking out ok 

Aiden and Nicholas 

CARL DON’T FOLLOW HER 

Who took the gun Rick hid???

They WHAT with the walker ??? The fuck ???? 😐😐😐

Aiden swinging on Glenn - Glenn dropping him with a single hit - Daryl immediately jumping in - Daryls growling and feral dog pacing - yes 👀

When your own mother thanks someone for knocking you on your ass you know its bad 

“.. Then we’ll just take this place.” Oh FUCK

S5, ep 13

Sleeping on the floor in their own places cause its what they’re used to 

Olivia - pantry and weapons 

“They just keep getting luckier.” .. “We’re here now.” Facts 

Them pretending to be teaching Carol how to shoot while they make plans - iconic considering she’s a queen 

‘W’ on the walker’s forehead ????? Or ‘M’ ??

Imagine trying to get the jump on Daryl - could never be me 

Daryl’s extra hot these last 2 episodes 

YOU MEAN TO TELL ME YOU CAN’T TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN HUMANS AND WALKERS BY SOUND ?!?!?! HOW ARE YOU ALIVE ??!?!?!?

She has high hopes for a world in the middle of a zombie apocalypse 

“People are the real threat now.” They kinda always were tho dude 

A welcoming party ??? Seriously ???

“We can’t use Daryl. They’re watching every move he makes.” Leave my Pookie alone 

“I get to be invisible again.” DFNDWOSKNFLKDKNFIJ I HATE YO EX HUSBAND 

Horsey 

Knowing that Norman is terrified of horses makes this hilarious to watch 

“I ain’t gonna hurt ya.” Pookie 

“You used to be somebody’s huh? Now you’re just yours.” That’s oddly profound 

Tobin - weapons 

“The more afraid they get, the more stupid they get.” 

Daryl going to save the horse 

Walkers eating animals - I knew it but fuck it sucks 

NO

NO 

NO 

NO 

NO 

NO 

NOT THE HORSE 

NO 

NO 

Killing the walkers that kill the horse 

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

THATS THE SADDEST DEATH SO FAR 

Daryl lurking outside the party 

“I said try. You did.” 

Pete - doctor 

Pete and Jessie have red ‘A’ on their hands 

Idk how I feel about Jessie 

“I’m just saying, we all lost things.” Yeah but you’ve been behind a wall for god knows how long while Rick and his family were fighting for their lives from cannibals and rapists

Spencer - one of Deanna’s sons 

Pookie, baby, stop eating like that 

“👹Thanks👹”

Aaron has a job for Daryl - and a bike 

YOU WANT DARYL DIXON TO BE A RECRUITER ?!?!?!?

“You want me risking mine, right?” Such a fair comment 

Was that a flicker of emotion on your face I just saw Daryl Dixon ?!??!

“Thanks.. 👹I’ll get you some👹 rabbits👹” 

God Carol don’t get caught 

Not the fucking kid 

CAROL

DAMN 

“You’ll be outside the walls, far, far away, tied to a tree.” Fuck ok 

Why are people expecting them to just.. bounce back into ‘normality’ after god knows how long fighting for their lives ???

RICK

NO

NO

ABSOLUTELY NOT 

It’s a zombie apocalypse and you’re worried about your book club ???? The fuck is wrong with you 

SASHA BBY CALM 

I KNOW THEY’RE CRAZY 

KEEP IT TOGETHER 

S5, ep 14

Pastor man ripping up the Bible 

BIKE 

DARYL 

DARYL ON BIKE 

KSJDFNORNFVOIK

Reg agreeing to teach Noah about architecture 

I’m just waiting for shit to hit the fan 

“Now you’re going to die.” On the music is ironic and not at all helpful 

EUGENE SHUT THE FUCK UP

Why are you questioning Glenn?!?!?

Aiden you are a fucking idiot and I hate you 

Glad he’s dead

Tara pls don’t be dead 

Eugene pls die 

This fucken kid is really annoying Jesus 

Fuck Aiden’s not dead 

“Let’s be friends man.” Why you being threatening then Pete ?

Aiden deserves it 

Pete’s abusing Jessie - calling it now 

Fuck Nicholas man - walkers got Noah because Nicholas is a coward 

Pastor man thinks that Satan is at play in the walls of Alexandria - through Rick and his family 

Carol also thinks Pete is abusing Jessie 

“The day will come when they’ll put their own lives before yours and everyone else’s and they will destroy everything you have here, everything you’re working so hard to build.” 

“You’re gonna have to kill him.” Uh.. ok. 

S5, ep 15

The music is a vibe 

Sasha sweetie you ok? 

OI CAROL MADE THAT FOR YOU

DON’T YOU DARE IGNORE IT 

Light off in the distance - Daryl leave it alone 

Nicholas you piece of shit 

Also don’t trust Spencer 

Actually - I don’t trust any of the people in Alexandria 

She knew he was beating his wife and she did nothing about it - get fucked 

They’ve been fighting for so long they need it 

Who’s hacking up walkers ????

THE WOMAN TIED TO A TREE AND LEFT TO DIE 

‘W’ again 

“If it’s gotten worse, it means he’s killed you.” Facts 

Rick why this chick ??

Don’t lie Rick, you have done this shit foe others 

“Someone who’s trying not to kill you.” I get it, but like.. please do 

“We’re the ones who live.” 

“We have to control who lives here.” “Thats never been more clear to me than right now.” So Rick’s gotta go but the wife beater can stay? Get fucked 

MICHONNE ?!?!?!

S5, ep 16

Morgan? 

Who’s the dick with the gun? 

HES GOT A ‘W’

Y’all are getting yo asses beat 

Why’d you roll up on a man with a gun that doesn’t work?????

DARYL

YO THIS EPISODE IS OVER AN HOUR LONG THE FUCK 

“Because these people are children and children like stories.” 

Sasha what the fuck are you doing? 

Are the people they sent away going to cause problems ???

Side note: Carl and Rick have the same eyes - the casting director did a good job there 

WHO RIGGED THE TRUCKS 

‘W’ 

Using the chain fuckkkkk

‘Trap. Bad people coming. Don’t stay.’ Well fuck 

“And then who would believe I did it because I didn’t like you?” Carol my queen 

“You’re a small, weak nothing.” Slay 

NICHOLAS I WILL KILL YOU

HOW DARE YOU 

LEAVE GLENN ALONE 

Why in the FUCK would you make it so the wife beater can see his wife’s house when you’ve separated him ?????

Ayeeeeee we got a Daryl chuckle !!!!

MORGAN SAVING DARYL AND AARON 

Please let the Pastor man die 

Rosita meddling to get Abraham and Eugene to talk - mother of 2 shitty kids behaviour 

NO

DON’T LEAVE THE GATE OPEN 

YOU FUCKER 

Don’t fucking leave Glenn to die you bastard 

“I’m still with you.” Obviously 

RICK 

LEAVE THE GATE 

PASTOR MAN HAS PROBABLY DONE IT ON PURPOSE TO FRAME YOU 

FUCKEN HELL

WALK AWAY 

“I think I wanna die.” Sasha you’ve been through hell and you’re not back yet. 

Pastor man can rot 

GUYS

WHILE YOU’RE DECIDING IF HE’S WORTH IT, HE’S SAVING YOUR LIVES FROM WALKERS 

Oh thank god Glenn 

Who shot the walker on Rick ??? Sasha ????

“Simply put, there is a vast ocean of shit that you people don’t know shit about. Rick knows every fine grain of said shit and then some.” Yes, yes he does. 

Rick, bby, that’s not how you do this 

Nicholas begging for his life - as he should 

‘W’ has photos of Rick and Carl -  fuck 

Pete killing Reg 

“Rick.. do it.” Oh so he can kill when its convenient for YOU 

Daryl and Aaron bringing Moran to Rick, just as Rick kills Pete