#I did my best to follow the written description for this design

[sarcasticgaypotato]

This cat has a PhD

---

Fanart for Panthera by @idrewacow

I cannot recommend this fic enough, it is an absolute delight so far. It's a classic, traditionally lighthearted fanfiction trope being handled dead serious and it's everything I didn't know I needed. It doesn't hesitate to dig its claws (haha) into visceral discomfort for our lead, but it still has moments that made me laugh out loud. Can't wait to see what happens next!

[weirdsht]

Hi! Good day/evening to you. Would it be alright if we get more of yan!cale? 😽 I read ur yan!cale stories and I deeply stand by you.

Overboard

notes: i'm not experienced with writing yanderes and I couldn't think of a specific scenarios so i went with this a short fic instead. If you have any scenarios in mind feel free to send them and i'll do my best to deliver!

tags: subtle yandere cale (tbh you have to squint huhu), established relationship, vague novel spoilers

English isn’t my first language so there will be grammatical errors

Pls don't repost my work anywhere without my permission

Constructive criticisms and any kind of interaction are more than welcome

Requests are open and welcome

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The clock strikes just after midnight. It was quiet as everyone had gone to their designated rooms to sleep.

Almost everyone that is.

Cale and Ron are still awake and talking. With the young master sitting on the couch and the servant standing up beside him as he reads the documents he has been given.

Usually, Cale would have been asleep long ago. At this time he would be cuddling with his significant other and the children averaging nine years old. In fact, he can hear the bed that’s just 10 steps away calling him already.

But alas he still has something to do.

“A viscount’s son huh? Where does he get the audacity to try and touch what’s mine?”

Ron stayed silent at his young master’s calm voice. Instead, he peeked at the document in Cale’s hand.

The document was something the servant had written himself. It consisted of every detail that happened when Cale’s significant other was away. Getting a much-needed vacation after being cooped up at the underground villa during the entirety of the war.

It consisted of places they went to. Things they bought. People they talked to. Even things they looked at for more than 30 seconds.

Every move they made was written in that document.

“Ron, everyone knows that the Henituse is a duchy now right?”

“Of course young master.”

“And everyone knows who my significant other is right?”

“Yes, young master. You are a famous figure in both continents, your significant other is bound to be known too.”

Usually, Cale would grimace at the thought of him being famous. But not right now.

“Then why would such a lowly noble like this trash here dare make a move on _____?”

“Some rabbits just don’t know the value of their lives, young master.”

Cale could feel his anger rising. However, he held it in. He can’t raise his voice right now. Not only was it late but _____ and the children were already asleep on the bed a few steps away from him.

Huuu

“I wanted for _____ to relax for once. The war was quite detrimental to their health.”

The young master sighed once more before fully calming down.

“You did a good job not letting that bastard go near them again after the 2nd time it happened.”

Ron flashed his usual benign smile at the compliment. Despite that, Cale could see in the old man’s eyes that he was not yet satisfied.

“Was _____ bothered that much?”

“Yes, young master. They felt distraught during the first two days of their vacation because of him.”

Ah, so that’s why Ron was still angry.

“Then I guess looting him dry won’t be enough. I’ll you handle the rest. Go do whatever will ease your heart. Just make sure to clean up afterwards.”

Molan’s last patriarch only bowed before going out of Cale’s room. The documents that Cale had been reading are in his hands, ready to be burned at the fireplace. Despite the lack of verbal response from the benign old man, Cale knows he will follow the orders given to him.

Which was why he could go back to bed with a lighter heart.

Meanwhile, the documents are now successfully fueling the fireplace of the villa. Ron watches the paper turn to ash. He oversees how the last thing that was burned was the description of the viscount’s son. Written below that was his offence.

His crime?

Trying to flirt with _____. Twice.

Even had the nerve to say a pickup line.

“Maybe I’ll let Choi Han handle him instead.”

[sugar-coated-prat-dragon]

Question and answers post: (Merlin book edition)

Episode: "The Gates of Avalon" S1, E7

Questions written by @tansyuduri

Books used for reference: “The Sorcerers Curse”, “Sword and Sorcery”, Merlin complete guide and Merlin villains guide.

Question/Thought: Sidhe being so fast Merlin has to slow time to see them is interesting.

Answer taken from the book: They move so fast that only those who possess powerful magical abilities - such as Merlin - are able to observe them.

My answer: 💭 I think Merlin used his ability to slow down time at a glance, much like he did during the fight between Sir Owain and the Black Knight (which is why only Merlin himself saw the initial fatal wound and no one else).

It's also the ability Merlin used while watching the assassin Myror try to stab Arthur with the hidden tip of the spear while jousting and only he himself saw that happening.

Second thought: Those lights in the water do not move as they sidhe do, they are a reflection of what is in Avalon not what is in our world. Avalon is lit with pretty blue crystals.

Book description: When Merlin follows the Sidhe Aulfric Tirmawr to a vast lake, his magic allows him to see what few have ever witnessed - the brightly coloured Sidhe city of Avalon that lies beneath the lake's surface. This is the land of eternal youth - a place that mortals glimpse only in the moment before death.

My answer: 💭 It's very possible that it's lit with blue lights, but given the description of "brightly coloured Sidhe city of Avalon". I think it's more likely that it's a vast amount of different colors.

Question: This fits best with the Irish version of the Celtic otherword in which it is not actually the place where dead people go but a paradise, with yes Eternal youth

Book description: His magic allows him to see what few have ever witnessed - the brightly coloured Sidhe city of Avalon that lies beneath the lake's surface. This is the land of eternal youth - a place that mortals glimpse only in the moment before death.

My thoughts: 💭 It seems like Avalon isn't the place humans go after death, but rather a place specifically designed to be a city/realm for Sidhe.

Likely the only exception to this is Arthur when he dies, because his soul remains in Avalon (rather then the brief moment of Avalon that humans usually get) and he remains stuck there between life and death until his resurrection. Almost like a coma of sorts, since he never fully crosses over.

[suckitdeku]

Hisoillu Week(end)

Prompt (08/23): past (first encounter)

Hisoka (24yo) was bored. He needed a new playmate. Illumi Zoldyck (21yo) just fell into his trap.

TW: blood, homie-cide, probably a violent family, stalkering, sexual references, so on and so forth... but just slightly :) also some typos.

This came out by the headcanon that my dear @lumizold and I had about their meeting. We also roleplayed it and it was the time of my life istg. Guess who roled who. Actually pretty easy. Too easy maybe. But here I tried to wrote them both on my own, and he liked the result, so i guess this is... good! At the very least. So shoutout to him for helping me understand better this difficult and majestic character, illumi zoldyck. He's now the boy of my life. And if it wasn't for him, i couldn't have written this as canonic as it- should be? is? well it's just conjugetion, we don't really care.

Enjoy!

Illumi was in the airship, heading towards a spot in the Padokea region where he got an assignment. A very important assignment... which would have made lots of money, according his grandfather Zeno, who just congratuled him for the assignment received. Well, if the Zoldycks' bank account was happy, the Zoldycks would have been happy too. Right?

He didn't question about it, but he had to admit that the request was pretty weird. Asking to a family of assassins for protection wasn't impossible, nor improbable, but... unusual? definiterly the most unusual thing ever happened to him. His square mind couldn't can a so shapeless thought... it was worst than having an uncovered glass of water in your car while speeding... and drifting. Up a montain road. Through sharp bends. In short, the water spills everywhere and you can't keep it in the glass, where it should have been since the beginning... if there were salted pistachios in that glass, they wouldn't have flown all over. Like the water did. He hated water as a kitten does.

Sitting straight and perfectly still in his second class seat, he kept overthinking his job assignment.

He knew little to nothing about it. Nothing too useful, and that was the reason he was ruminating the best way to make things work in case something went wrong upon his arrival.

A wealthy mafia boss has been repeatedly harassed by a real weirdo, whose incredible strength frightened all of his guards (all the hundred persons designated on working on his safety were terrified by him). He followed him everywhere he went, he stopped him to talk and ask him very molest questions. There, he had obtained this description of him: he was a molest man, tall and muscular with "shoulders like this" (you would say it's an accurate description), with magenta hair pulled back that stayed like this as if under an enchantment, a strange clown make-up with a little star and a teardrop under each eye, odd clothes with card suits motif and ridiculous shoes (again, what an accurate description...), but his voice was mellifluous and hardly you could discern his gentleness and his way of fooling you. It was so stressful, dealing with him. And therefore he was easily recognizable.

Illumk kept looking outiside the window.

The mysterious, molest clown was, among other things, a violent. He threatened to kill him in exactly five days, and already got in a fight with his guards, snuck in his super-secured estate's garden... well, he was a public manace walking on well-functioning legs. Illumi already thought that making those legs useless could be a good idea... but the client commissioned the homicide before he could pull out a joke of his, and so be it. In faxt, his job made more sense this way. Protect the client... by killing an enemy. Yes. This way, now, even the water in the glass had become governable in that devious journey.

And he went back to staring out the window.

He just wanted to go back home and see how his little brother Killua was handling their father's care.

?!?

Illumi felt dumbfounded. He wasn't effectively shocked, but... he still was speechless, his big black eyes whose pupils couldn't stand out over their irides were drawn towards the silent estate in front of him.

Corpses.

Corpses, corpses, corpses.

Corpses everywhere in the garden. Were they planted there as decorations, in order to scare the most cowards or were they there to give troubles to the one who had hired them?

One of the floor lamp along the walkaway had been blown. Something was stuck in it, and had short out part of the electric system, and now it was slowly catching fire.

It was... a playing card.

So, he really was dealing with a clown.

As if he was terrified, in that catatonic state of his, Illumi started running through the corpses, jumping over the blood puddles on his way, without sparing a glance at the deads' abhorrent expressions.

He really felt a bit of dread.

If... he failed...

He would not receive his payment! Those two- really serious parents perfectly capable of taking absolutely rational and logic decisions didn't get paid up front. Once, he tried to advice them about that little, hazardous detail... but after receiving that slap from his father, he couldn't even remember what was so hazardous about getting paid when the job was finished. And now they risked receiving nothing.

And yet, Illumi was right on time... he got embarked like a robot on the first available transportation, with the confidence that the clown would have made his appearence in eighteen hours circa... instead, the clown arrived and made them all dead. Deads. Deads everywhere.

Deads everywhere in every hallway he passed through. Was that a finger, that one he was seeing hanging on the wall with a card? Oh, yeah, it really was a finger. A little finger. Certainly a little finger, because the severed hand five meters further ahead was missing a little finger.

Macabre and thorny details passed under his unperturbed glare to embed in his mind, as if pinning them with pins on an enormous board. It was the summary of all the things he should be reporting his dad, along with his ass in order to let him whip it to a pulp, probably.

He began to spy a room, the only one with an open door, the warm light escaping by slithering through the threshold.

Corpses. Corpses everywhere. A man hanging on the wall, and one crawling to the door to escape, were the ones who immediately caught his big eyes.

A mature man, around his 50s and bald, was being held by the throat by... a... a guy really tall, and big... with a giggle sweet as honey, kind of mellifluous, his pale, muscular arms with protruding veins stretched towards the adult. Something about his appearence seemed off, but he didn't pay that much attention.

He was toying with the man. Like a white kitten pawing maliciously at a tailless lizard, already mortally wounded by his claws and canines. The man almost didn't try to free himself, but he looked like he was waiting for a miracle, a small glimmer of salvation to get his paws off of him.

They were the only ones alive.

— Oh, I guess I have visitors~

His murmur wasn't directed to anyone buy the adult between his hands, who he hold tightly. His face was vermilion. He could already see, already imagine them, some ecchymosis in his eyes, the attempts to free himself getting irregular and limp, his strangled sounds disappearing...

He finally showed himself up, throwing one of his pins already infused with Nen against the clown.

He, just as an expert performer in the circus, looked like he was expecting the pin as if it was a circus act he and his most trustworthy partner tried a thousand times. He moved even before the pin was ready to be flung, and... that was a matter of instants.

He bend his knees, threw back his head and all of his body. His back was a perfect arch in that pose so uncomfortable and artistic altogether. His hair, apparently with nothing left to hold it up, were now slipping across his face with oh so perfect features.

He abruptly released his victim in order to stay in that position, and the man stumbled in place for a single moment.

And threw himself back onto the clown, taking a breath in the process.

He jolted. Illumi, inside his soul, did the same.

The pin ended up on his jugular, and the man kept a hand on his neck, dazed. From the way he staggered you could tell he was dizzy.

With a wince which made him lose his playful smirk, the clown crouched down, ready to spring into action. His hair was in plac- his hair was in place, when had he recombed them?

He was glaring at the pin, without worrying about Illumi two meters away from them. He glared it. And glared at the man, while he was taking the unusual weapon and removing it from his neck. It was disgust. Disgust for his stupidity.

The man tumbled with a thud. His vertigo more dizzy than before with every squirt of blood gushing out the wound, now more deadly than before.

— Everyone knows that wounds with the weapon still inside should not be touched.

Both him and the Zoldyck watched him pant with wide eyes. The realization about his screw-up had hit him hard, just like the thought he was dying. The unknown man, pulling out a playing card, wondered if the victim of that cruel fate was thinking of something in particular: a warm greeting to his liver or the burning desire to spit on his father's and his assassin's tomb. They observed his life slip away from his eyes.

— If the weapon is still inside, you still have the chance to save your life yourself.

A strangled sound.

His eyes glassy.

An embarassing silence. The Zoldyck was stuck and static. He wasn't swinging lightly on his own feet. He wasn't shifting his weight from a side to the other, and he wasn't looking away from the new cadaver, still warm. He looked nervous in his own way. He was extremely illegible.

— Don't tell me that the one whose life I just casually took away was the mafia boss who instructed me to kill you.

— No no~ — the stranger laughed, turning to face him. That Zoldyck was so ugly and ungroomed... black hair cutted in a bob, his athletic figure concealed by a banal track suit in unattractive colors or... generally not very colorful. And it was such a shame, because his doll-like eyes, his perfect and also symmetric features, summed up with those thin, pinky lips with an adorable shape were really attractive. — He was head of the guards.

— So where did you left the person I'm looking for?

— Right at your feet, asking for mercy~

Illumi lowered his gaze. There was the man he previously saw, ho looked like he was crawling for his dear life.

Illumi took a deep breath, staring at him without batting an eye. Literally. Not a movement. He didn't even looked mad. No throbbing vein on his neck. Nor sweat droplets.

The maniac tried to incite him.

— I got bored waiting for you~ I decided to kill time playing cat and mouse. Or mice~ obviously you can see they're city mice~ they didn't run away from me well enough... I had to kill 'em all to satisfy my bloodlus-

The Zoldyck turned around, and calmly started walking away.

The maniac stayed there, looking at the threshold, batting his lashes with surprise.

Was he dumb?

He jogged after him, as if nothing had happened.

!?!

— Weren't you going to kill me~?

— Stop moaning and lower your voice.

— Coomee ooon~ answer me~

— I haven't been paid.

— Yeah, no shit, you didn't finish your job yet if I'm still alive~

— He who hired me is dead. The contract is no longer valid. I'm going back home.

— To mommy and daddy, huh~?

— Yes. If I'm going back home I'm going back to them. Not to other people.

— And don't you want to entertain yourself with me, killing time together~?

— No. I don't have time.

— Yes you have, that guy's dead and no one can disturb us while we're getting to... know each other~

That maniac was sticling his hands out too much. Yep. Pretty molest. He slapped them away, and the man groaned in pleasure.

— No. I have to go back home and explain this trouble.

— So~? I took away your assignment, you should be mad, or scared of their reactions~

— I'm just pensive.

— What else~?

He developed him in his sticky embrace, whispering in his ear. He believed he was pushing him into talking about more interesting matters, with his own hands brushing and caressing his hips, because he felt shivers running on his skin.

— I feel like. Having a lollipop.

— Here, take it, babyboy.

The Zoldyck, amazed, turned to face him, still in his embrace, as if it was nothing. His eyes weren't surprised, but his arched brows definitely were. Now they were both still, one before the other, and were looking at each other. Then, his black eyes slowly drifted away from the stranger's pure gold irises to halt on his lightly stretched-out hand.

Between tapering fingers, tightly hold between long and sharp nails, there was a small lollipop.

He batted his lashes and took it. It was as thin as a card, under his fingertip, and... seemed a card, for real.

— Are you kidding me?

The lollipop, point of contention of the two hands, suddenly became a card. A jolly.

Too fun. He was being sarcastic.

The man smiled like a fox, his lips stretched and closed, eyes narrowed. — It's a trick~

Illumi squeezed his eyelids, unamused, and took some distance from him to look at his face. His make-up was odd, it was true. He just noticed it. It seemed like a make-up for clown, maybe because of the teardrop and the tiny star, but... clowns didn't paint their face that way. They were... so colourful and showy.

His gaze wenr back to normal, while the man kept staring at him. — You... are not the clown I was looking for, right?

The man lost his smile, and gazed at him. His eyes had lost their light. He didn't seem to be enjoying himself either. — I am a magician, little Zoldyck.

And he parted his lips in a "o", his brows lightly arched as if comprehensive. — So you're not who I'm looking for. — and he added under his breath that, in fact, the magician make-up wasn't included in the identikit, and that he was licky he recognized it. The man's frown deepened.

— I indeed am the one~ you silly~

— No, you're wrong. I'm looking for a clown. He looks exactly like you... but he paints his face like a clown.

— You dummy, I'm the one who persecuted your client~ I did it on purpose, in order to lure you here~

The Zoldyck parted again his thin lips in a "o" shape, and his eyebrows raised, too. Maybe he realized he was in a trap.

— But I was told to look for a clown... you're a magician, I noticed it.

— I am a magician, my name's Hisoka, — he spelled his introduction for the idiot. — As a matter of fact, however, I get mistaken for... a cheap clown.

— Clowns are not cheap. — said the young man. On second thought, he looked really young — They make you laugh, scared and kill people.

— Only in horror movies.

— My life is a horror movie.

Hisoka smiled a little hearing those words. — You're an enjoyable person, little Zoldyck~

— I'm not little. I'm the firstborn.

— But how~ how old are-

He got interrupted by an unpleasant noise. In the quiet of the night, to sweep away the blissful and relaxing sensation of the humid air brushing the naked skin, several sirens got closer to the location of the slaughter.

The Zoldyck started running to the woods. Hisoka, without missing a bit, followed right after.

— And here I thought you enjoyed attention, all eyes on you. — the Zolduck murmured, between a long stride and the other. — Back there, there are lots of eyes ready to watch you and lots of hands ready to catch you.

— But no one could do it like you~

That answer didn't break him down, instead he quickened his pase. Hisoka was stalking him.

— You still haven't ask me a single thing. — he said after one minute of jogging in the wood.

The Zoldyck didn't spare him a single look. — I don't care.

— But we're walking together~

— You're following me.

— Talk to me, coomee oonnn~

— I gotta go.

Hisoka grabbed him in his embrace, forcing the other to stop.

— What's your name~?

— I have no time. — was his crude response

He found himself pointing a pin against his throat, and his Adam's apple grazed it as it bobbed to swallow and moan.

But Hisoka craved for more. He crawled over his body as if he were dying. He didn't care about the pin, may the pain be welcomed, on the contrary. But he needed to be with him.

— I'm bored~ so bored~ I need... someone on my level to fight with~ I've set a trap for you to meet you, little Zoldyck.

So he had revealed his cards. I hoped to intrigue him. It had to intrigue him. He had to get it out of that head somehow. Maybe it would all end in a bloodbath.

But the Zoldyck just kept glaring at him. — I'm sorry. I can't stay here risking to het caught. If you know my surname, you also know my family and the rumors going around us.

Hisoka nodded, purring on him. He wasn't trying to leave his arms anymore. — No one know your names and your faces, so infamous in everywhere in Padokea~

— My father would not appreciate me ending up in jail. — he pointed out. — I don't know about you, but I don't want to get arrested.

Hisoka's face leaned over towards his. — When will I see you again, then~?

And the young man allowed himself to be deceived. He paid no attention to that touch, to those hungry looks, and only said a few words.

— Are you able to remember phone numbers?

A shiver run down his spine. A Zoldyck's phone number was the best he could hope for, obviously after a fuck/fight with one of them. — Ohh~ well, yes, yeah...

— I'm going to tell you. — he cutted short.

But Hisoka moaned, attaching himself on his body. Illumi felt with a growing embarrassment... something poking against his hips. — Oh no, just not right away~ if you write it on my arm... I'll show you a trick and no one will see your number~

The young man stayed still, looking at him. In silence. His eyes shone a bit. — A magic trick?

— I'm a magician for a reason~

He batted his lashes. — Arm. — he streched out his hand.

Hisoka vibrated with excitement, extending it to to him, nonchalantly. He still had his lips streched in that fox-like smirk of his. — How merciful of you~ you allow me to still stay close to you and give me such a cuddle~? I must seem to you to be on the verge of death and in need of one last wish~

The young Zoldyck took something out of his pocket. A small pin, so sharp, the top of it green. Slowly, looking at him in the eye, he started likinv it, his pink tongue leaving saliva at every lick.

Hisoka didn't know exactly what that little show he was witnessing was, but he knew that he didn't mind it at all. His throbbing member between his legs told him so. The warm pang in his stomach told him so. The eyes that became pools of liquid gold at the heavenly sight.

When it was all nice and moist, he dully took it away from his mouth.

— Are you going to write with that~?

— Yes. How are you going to hide the number?

— With my favorites Nen technique, of course~

He carried it lightly against his skin. He pressed the tip gently, and when he broke the skin a trickle of blood flowed calmly.

The night was torn from its quiet by the moans and cries of pleasure of a man, sweetly tortured by a very nice, unique and skilled assassin, who loved to dilate time under his expert touch to prick it with pins.

Hisoka couldn't remember ever feeling so excited.

When their paths separated, the young assassin had discovered that Bungee-gum has the properties of both rubber and gum, and Texture Surprise could be very useful in cases where the wounds needed to be hidden in some way, and Hisoka had discovered that the person with whom he had pleasantly spent minutes of total ecstasy was called Illumi Zoldyck, and that his telephone number was... divine when written in blood.

[cliozaur]

When you run out of your canon-era fanfics, you start looking for AUs and crossovers. And it’s such an enormous topic to discuss! I would like to start with some recs (we're talking Valvert fanfics, of course). Some authors are just so good and creative when it comes to AUs.

A Change of a Bizarre Kind by M_Moonshade (set in MsM) – I will never shut up about it! It’s a crossover of Les Mis and Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. It’s written amazingly well and has a non-linear narrative. Javert fighting for control and losing it is breathtaking. One of my favourite fanfic Javerts! Caring and overprotective Valjean is what most of us love. Fantine survives and is the only reasonable person around those two. And they have adventures! Dr. Jekyll is, of course, a perfect villain! One of my favourite Valvert fanfics.

What Sort of Devil also by M_Moonshade (set in Paris). This time Valjean is a vampire, self-sacrificing and caring. Javert is exercising and excelling in self-deception. They have even more adventures, and this time Thénardier is the villain. The author’s style is, as always, excellent, and the author’s comments are hilarious.

The next three fics took me time to dare to read. AUs and descriptions can make you dumbstruck, but they turned out to be excellent pieces: well-written, thoroughly thought out. The AUs are well-designed, logical, and well-explained. Javert and Valjean both have recognizable characters, excellent at teasing each other. Their dialogues are highly entertaining and amusing. These fics are good from the point of view of historical details – if the author decides to be anachronistic, it’s for a reason, and it’s explained.

Guard’s Law, Con’s Heart by Xythia (set in Toulon, but it’s 1823). To be honest, I only risked reading it because of Toulon. It’s described as a BDSM universe, which initially did not inspire me. But I gave it a chance and never regretted it. This universe has its rules, and they are not what you expect. They influence social structure and traditions, and it’s all explained and well-used for the plot. Something bad starts happening at the beginning, but Javert arrives on time to stop and prevent it. He takes responsibilities he himself did not expect. Then Javert and Valjean interact and communicate with each other, and it’s such a pleasure and entertainment to follow their exchanges! And I usually do not appreciate OCs, but here I enjoyed them.

Winter Wolf also by Xythia (set in MsM). I already knew what to expect from the author, so even the obscure AU of Sentinels and Guides did not stop me. I had never heard of this AU, but it was not difficult to figure out what it is. A bit slow at the beginning, but then it gets excellent. Signature dialogues, development of relationships, adventures. And one of the best young Cosettes ever written. She is really an amazing little creature.

Eggy series also by Xythia (set in Toulon, and it’s again 1823). This time, one of them (Valjean) is a dragon-shapeshifter. But even as a dragon, he is unmistakably recognizable as Valjean. The world of people and dragons has its history and rules, and they are very well explained. Signature dialogues, good OCs. It really may sound strange as an AU, but it’s worth reading.

[greatbigbellies]

ANNOUNCING THE 2023 PREGNANCY KINK ADVENT CALENDAR!

After months (Yes, months) of planning and on and off work throughout this year, I am excited to unveil the 2023 Pregnancy Kink Advent Calendar! From December 1st to December 24th, I have new, unreleased, completely original content going up EVERY day. These range from written kink fics (clocking in at approximately 1k words each with some longer exceptions), some batches of pictures, both bare bellied and with a fake bump, multiple kink audios, AND a video floating around in there! I’ve been working hard planning, writing, recording, and editing everything for this for a while now, and I’m super excited to show it all off. I began work on this back in APRIL, so it’s been a labor of love (pun intended) that I’m really proud to have finished in time for december this year. Those vague calls for kink audio ideas that never seemed to come up again? Those repeat posts asking what people would scribble on my belly? Yeah, those were all for this. Which means if you sent something to me in response to those, congrats, it probably made it in!

So settle in and enjoy! New stuff drops starting 12/1/2023 all the way up to and including christmas eve! This whole thing was a fair bit of work but a LOT of fun to do, and if it gets enough positive interaction, I would be very open to doing it again next year. Check back every day for something new!

Additional details, context, and a bit of “developer commentary” under the cut!

So… what should I expect from this?

This is a larger scale project that I’ve been building for well over half a year, and I did my best to provide some variety to it. There is, of course, some good ol McPreggo content in there. Because it’s one of the most popular things this blog has to offer, I get a ton of asks about it, and it’d be silly of me to not give that crowd some love. That said, if you’re not really into McPreggo or rapid preg as a whole, fret not, there’s lots of other content to enjoy! Most of the written pieces involve longer progressions split over multiple posts. This is by design, because I didn’t want any one post to be too long (advent calendars are supposed to be easily consumed ‘treats’, but not whole presents unto themselves), but it’s hard to do anything meaningful with only 1K words to a post. If you’ve read my older stuff, like some of the comms I fulfilled a few years ago, you know the buildup and foreplay is really my strongest aspect, and it’s no different here (if you haven’t but would like to, the ‘commissions’ and ‘writing’ tags on my blog will take you where you want to go). Nothing in the calendar has any outright SEX scenes in it, but there’s plenty of pregnant contrivances and paragraph long descriptions of heavy bellies that you’ll find something you’ll like! There’s over 13k words cumulatively across all the writing, so there’s a wide breadth to enjoy!

The audios range from 3 and a half to 6 minutes long, with one more experimental, slow burn exception. They range from sweet to spicy, and might be my favorite content in the whole calendar. While previously I had been taking a premise and improvising most of it, these new ones are pretty tightly scripted, and I genuinely think they came out better for it. Less repetition, more creatively, and was able to work in some sound effects to set the scene and tone for some of them. I think you’ll enjoy them!

Outside of that, I’m going to leave the rest as a surprise. Like I said, I’ve got audio, video, pictures, and writing, so there’s a lot to look forward to!

Is this something I’m supposed to pay for?

Absolutely not, this is all free. I made this because I wanted to, and wanted to share it with people. This blog is 5 years old now and is sporting well over 5K followers, which is to say it has way more popularity and staying power than I expected it to when I made it. You guys are great, and wanted to, in my own weird way, treat everyone who has been following, sending asks, and chatting with me so far. If you really genuinely would like to give back, I have tips turned on for my blog, but I’m putting this out there not expecting anything back.

This is THE PEOPLES preg kink content, damnit!

Are you going to do this again next year?

If people enjoy it, then I would like to, yes! I’m not some harsh corporation with strict engagement minimums to uphold, so I don’t know what “enough” interaction looks like to justify a 2024 edition but if people are liking and reblogging, and I get an ask or two about it, then I’d call that a win! It’s just good to know that hard work is appreciated, y’know?

If anyone else out there likes the idea and wants to do something similar, I would be very excited at the prospect of collaborating in the future. It’s not lost on me that this whole production doesn’t have any kink art, but believe me, you don’t want to see me try to draw something resembling a person, let a lone trying to make it sexy. Even if someone wanted to contribute a single article, a written piece, some art, an audio even, even just 1 “day” of content for people to enjoy would be amazing. Any outside contributors would, of course, receive credit for their work and have their main tumblr (or other kink social media) listed in their post.

Honestly, if I had enough people reach out and want to contribute, I would likely just create a separate sideblog JUST for pregnancy fetish advent calendars, so it’s not going up on any ONE contributor’s blog to benefit them above anyone else. I didn’t want to reach out to artists in the community going “hey would you like to draw some free art for this thing I’m doing that I’m gonna post in december, I swear”, because that just reads like a scam. I’m hoping that, having made and rolled out everything myself at least once, it can stand as proof that I am genuine about this kind of thing. A way to prove for someone that has the drive and bandwidth to work on this, that I’m not going to take credit or otherwise run off having gotten free art/work.

If you’re reading this and have something you would be interested in contributing to the calendar next year, my DMs are open, and it is never too early!

Any other questions, or just to share what you think about it all, shoot me an ask or a DM!

[dyrewrites]

Since you say you like when we share: My current original work brainrot is a classic High Fantasy with a focus on trope inversion. It started out with a writing prompt that I did a fill for, but because I was on call that week it took me long enough to finish it that it grew a backstory. My favourite line from it is, "I DON'T WANT YOUR FORGIVENESS. Forgiveness is for people who are sorry, and I'm not!"

My favourite description of the main characters is, "Davan's best romantic choice really was the obsessed sociopath with violent tendencies who falsely accused him of sexual harrassment. Lucky for him Ri's back now."

Ri is a fascinating character that I'm always worried I won't do justice to. He absolutely is a sociopath with NO moral compass of his own. He's also very queer in a bunch of different ways, traumatized as fuck, and possibly neurodivergent. And it's honestly a coin toss which of those four things any particular trait of his is due to. He's perfectly designed and set up to be the woobiefied character, but he's definitely not. Davan's actually the human cinnamon roll that wants the best for everyone and is still tormented by his own traumas. Ri generally takes it on the chin. The only person he cares about, above even himself and his own survival, is Davan. So Ri actually presents as a very nice and good person because otherwise Davan would be disappointed.

It's being written/plotted in non-linear snippets. If I ever actually fill it out to novel length it'll need to be sewn together like a quilt. But it's a lot of fun to plan.

I do indeed enjoy when people share!

This sounds delightful. High fantasy is one I usually only pay attention to when there's someone -off- about it, if that makes sense? So trope inversion intrigues.

Also you got me with Ri, that is a character type I always like following. There's so much to work with there, it's impossible not to find them fascinating.

I hope you keep working on it, and keep in mind novels aren't the only endgame here. There's episodic options, which I can't seem to remember the precise term for so maybe someone else can help me out there, but it's a weekly/monthly thing and quite a few seem to love that.

So if you keep going with the non-linear snippets and can't really see it as a novel, maybe that would be worth looking into.

But definitely keep going, this sounds awesome!

[pinkiepiebones]

Exciting Job Opportunities in Your Area!

Missing film reels. Written for the prompt " '31 Dracfield"

--Long Ago--

Robert Montague Renfield had arrived at Castle Dracula a real estate lawyer. His office had received a letter of inquiry regarding available land in London, and Robert, he jumped at the opportunity for the assignment as soon as he heard that title- Count. A count! A foreign fellow, yes, but surely a noble foreigner. A wealthy, noble foreigner, one would be led to believe.

Robert scoured the paperwork regarding available parcels and sent the notations and descriptions and sketches and floor layouts and history and chain of ownership and prices to the Count in Transylvania and even paid for expedited post.

A week later, a letter addressed "For the eyes of Mr. RM Renfield only" arrived on his desk. Robert did his best to temper his excitement but a giggle escaped his lips as he cracked the blood-red wax seal- God, how quaint!- and found that the Count had kindly returned all the paperwork and had inscribed in flowing, elegant handwriting, that Carfax Abbey would suit his needs perfectly. Bundled with the note was partial payment for the place (a blighted spit of godforsaken marsh nestled next to a madhouse! Ah, how the wealthy spend their exorbitant sums) and... Oh.

Robert squinted at the cursive. For a foreigner, the Count wrote in excellent English. But this- it was instructions. Addressed to Robert himself.

His heart sped up as he read.

"Mr. Renfield,

I wish to discuss with you, in person, the purchase of Carfax Abbey in London. I am unable to travel at this time; however, I will at once see to it that your travel to my home is paid for in full, should you respond in the affirmative and agree to follow my instruction. I await your reply, Mister Renfield.

Your friend, Dracula"

Your friend.

Robert did not discuss it with his wife or with his fellow solicitors. He tucked the letter inside his suitcoat, pressed firmly against his heart, and sent his response in secret. He felt as though he was to soon embark on an incredible journey.

The Count's response came within days. Robert ran his fingertips over the wax seal- this time, stamped not with a plain sort of stamp, but with what was undoubtably the design of the Count's family crest- and carefully shattered it. Inside were joyous salutations, a boarding pass for a ship leaving from London, a train ticket, a beautifully etched map, and instructions.

"Tell no soul where it is you are heading. Not friend nor lover. Your travel and arrival to my home must be bathed in the utmost secrecy."

Robert idly traced the word 'lover.' How peculiar of the Count to not say 'wife.' Surely he had mentioned Elizabeth in previous correspondence. What sort of family man didn't mention his family in the work hours? A married father makes more money than a confirmed bachelor. Right?

Robert brought the letter close and breathed deep. The paper was perfumed, just barely so, but he could smell something enchanting on it.

He borrowed books from the library and read all he could concerning Transylvania, so as to not look or sound foolish in his travels. He told his wife he would be going on a business trip two days before the ship was set to sail.

"Where to?"

"Ah, well, my client wishes me to keep that private."

Elizabeth looked at him from the vanity. This was how a great deal of their conversations took place now, her at the vanity in her nightgown, brushing her hair, he sitting on the edge of their bed in his pajamas. Dinner conversation (whenever Robert was present in the house and not working late) was focused mostly on their daughter and her schoolyard exploits.

"You can't tell me where you'll be going?"

"No, dear."

"What if something happens to Lillian? How would I get word to you?"

Robert looked down at his hands.

"And how long will you be gone?"

Robert fought the urge to simply shrug and said "my client wishes to discuss his purchase, and I'm to bring paperwork for him to sign. It shouldn't have me away for more than a week, maybe two if the weather turns."

Elizabeth stood and crossed the space between them. Her expression was unreadable, as was the case most of the time these days. Robert took her hand in his and looked up at her, eyes pleading.

"Elizabeth, I don't mean to be crass, but he's rich. He is nobility. This is my chance to get the life I- we, the life we deserve. The life Lillian deserves." He gently squeezed her hand, her wedding ring pressing into his palm.

Elizabeth sighed. "You'll go whether or not I support you going. So go." She took her hand from his and got in bed. "I will make up a story for Lillian," she said. "Because Lillian will ask where you've gone."

Robert approached his side of the bed.

"I- I'm going to take you and Lillian with me to London. She'll see me board the ship." He chuckled. "So, your story will start with a little sea faring."

Catherine was quiet.

Robert slept and dreamed of being consumed by shadows.

- Robert Montague Renfield had arrived at Castle Dracula a real estate lawyer. He had followed the Count's instructions implicitly, telling no soul of his final destination. The castle was shockingly dilapidated, but Robert pressed on, hoping, perhaps, that the disrepair and decay of the castle simply belied how miserly the Count has become with his vast fortunes; maybe the Count elected to hoard his wealth like a dragon instead of purchasing materials and labour for the upkeep of the stonework and such.

Robert gladly accepted drink from the Count and noticed the Count poured nothing for himself.

"I never drink... wine," the Count said with a smile that exposed sharp, sharp teeth.

The wine or something in it sent Robert to the floor. He woke, barely, to the sensation of fingernails stroking his face. He could have sworn he had heard women's voices before opening his eyes. Odd.

Dracula was crouched over him, staring. Robert swallowed, Adam's apple bobbing.

"The wine is strong for you," Dracula said, grinning. Robert was blushing. He knew he was.

"Um, y-yes, I think so."

Dracula's fingers ghosted over the exposed skin of Robert's neck and Robert gasped at the cool touch that set a fire in him.

"Your heart is so loud, Mister Renfield," Dracula chuckled.

Robert whimpered. He felt, suddenly, incredibly exposed, as though the Count's gaze had penetrated the depths of his soul, where he hid his truest self.

Dracula leaned down and kissed him. Robert's eyes fluttered closed and his arms, sluggishly, raised, fingers grasping at the Count's shoulders.

Robert whined when the Count broke the kiss. He sat up, dizzy still.

"You have had to hide yourself for so long," the Count cooed, stroking Robert's hair. "No use trying to hide from me."

Robert felt tears rolling down his face. Too many conflicting feelings and the wine and the lips and the crucifix, gone, torn away, a millstone unmoored from his neck.

"I am alone here," Dracula purred, still petting the bewildered lawyer. "You will stay here, with me, being my assistant."

"I... I will?"

Dracula smiled, eyes shining.

"You will make a very good assistant, Mister Renfield."

Dracula tilted Robert's chin up and leaned so close Robert could feel the Count's lips on his neck.

"I - yes. Yes, I will."

The Count sank his teeth into Robert's flesh.

"Yes-!"

[letstalkwhump]

Let's Talk Whump! No. 18

Welcome to Let’s Talk Whump, a series of interviews that spotlight the amazing people in our whump community! I’m Malice and I’ll be your host today. 

Today I’m talking whump with the amazing @crash-bump-bring-the-whump! 

Great to have you here, @crash-bump-bring-the-whump! Before we begin, do you mind sharing a little bit about yourself?

Hi! I’m Ruin, I’m a graphic designer and I love horror, drawing, and playing video games!

Alrighty, let’s get started! What does whump mean to you? 

Whump is the juicy bits of a story! It’s the conflict, the agony, the struggle! The good stuff that we’re all here for.

How did you find the whump community?

I found it because I was poking around for more hurt/comfort things to read! @friendlylocalwhumper and @sweetwhumpandhellacomf were actually the first blogs I followed! Lux and the Hunter, and Valerie and Eos were what inspired me to make my own blog. 

Do you feel like your view on whump has  changed since you joined?

Ohhh man all that’s super changed is that I’ve found more tropes that I like! I knew fevers and environmental and self-sacrifice whump were favs, like who doesn’t love a good sickfic or someone taking a bullet for their loved one, but I also really really discovered my love of gore and lab whump, which are just amazing. 

Everyone’s favourite topic: whump tropes! Which are your favourites?

Oh man, so many right now! I love a good drowning, and bouts of hypothermia are fantastic. Those tend to go hand-in-hand though so I usually feel blessed when I find stuff with those. I also love a good fever, “Stay with me”, kidnapping, and self-sacrifice though I’m not as big a fan of death, so this usually also includes intensive caretaking and probably a lot of worry from the other characters which is also amazing.

And your favourite piece you've written?

Oh this is hard, I have a few favorites! 

If I can cheat a little bit and name two, the first is MO-1620, which is my current fav OC Mariano’s prison psych transcript! It was super experimental for me, and I had a blast getting to explore his feelings about his imprisonment and how he sees himself versus the reality of his actions and behavior and circumstances. And the second is my first BTHB 2023 fill, for Possession ! I’d gotten House of Leaves for Christmas one year and the formatting just really grabbed me, so I wanted to try playing with that! Plus I love a good human AU, and my OC Will was too perfect for this prompt.

I love the style and formatting of MO-1620! That’s such a unique idea! Do you have a writing routine?

I usually write during the night! I usually have some flavored water, probably a little snack, and I definitely write best if I can just get a big chunk out at once. I try to write regularly while not putting pressure on myself, so it winds up being every few days at least, unless I’m just super grabbed by something and it won’t let go of my brain.

Is there an easy thing for you to write or anything you struggle with?

Oh I love writing horror. If I can incorporate horror into something, or explore what I think is scary about a situation, then it flows SUPER well. Or if I’m getting to do something with a lot of dialogue. Or lately, smut, because consensual NSFW writing has really been going well too.

I also tend to struggle with delving more into environmental, in-depth descriptions. Or diving hardcore into tactics with my military whump stuff because I…am not a clever man sometimes.  Also patiently staying on a linear timeline is the worst. I can never do it. Which sucks, because it puts me in a situation like now, where I KNOW how a bunch of characters WILL be and I want to write about it publicly NOW but first I have to REINTRODUCE them AND get them through the initial “I want to kill you here and now” conflict. 

Is there anything you're working on at the moment?

I’m working on so much right now! I do written roleplays, my drafts are 15 posts deep, and that’s not even counting my random google docs. Uh I’m working on introducing Mariano’s war buddies again, a bunch of smut, I have a grim reaper fighting a losing battle against a demon, a prompt game request for a friend, a response piece for my co writer, more therapy vignettes for said war buddies, and– you get the picture!

Sounds like you’re pretty swamped! Do you have any advice you’d like to share?

Write what makes you excited! If you don’t want to read what you’re writing, change it! Make it self indulgent! Make more OCs that are specifically catered to you and what you love and want to see! That’s more fun to read anyway, honestly, I love seeing passion!

Shout out to your favourite writing/whump blogs, bffs or people who've inspired you. We're hyping everyone up here!!!

YEAH HERE WE GO! I’ll shout out my co writer @brinkofdiscovery, my bestie @friendlylocalwhumper, my accomplices @comfy-whumpee , @that-one-thespian, and @painful-pooch, uh god there are so many more people. So many people are so sweet! @actress4him, and @inscrutable-shadow, and like everyone in the various servers I’m in, I can’t name everyone or this post would get so obscenely long so quickly… 

Anything you'd like to add?

Thank you for this!! It’s super fun to see this happening, and I like getting to see everyone talking about stuff.

Thanks so much for joining us today!

And to all you folks at home, have a whumpder-ful day!

[titleknown]

HELLOWEEN #19: HARLAHAN

-HARLAHAN is a High Buffoon of Hell, with 22 Gladiatorial circuses and 16 eggs of slain High Buffoons. He may teach in the arts of performance and clowning, cause uproarious laughter to the point of pain in the summoner's enemies, and summon great carnivals and places of entertainment.

He appears as a hideous clown with an arm like a bullwhip and the neck of a snake, with one shriveled dragon's wing behind his back-

Torture in Hell is, like most things, a cutthroat competition, so a look at what is considered the "up-and-comers" is perhaps always worthwhile when analyzing. 

Such is the case with Harlahan. The entry in the Last Testament appears to have been written before his entry into the field of torture, and the records corroborate this.

He appears to have a background in entertainment, a ruthless field in Hell as the eggs containing the essences of other entertainers he... well, his word for it was "scrambled," can attest. They were, however, doubled from the amount he was stated as having in the Last Testament, perhaps a sign of the times. 

Torture is a difficult business to break into at the best of times, and his explanation was that he did something "very funny" that got the attention of those who approve of such things. Judging by the records (mostly redacted) it involved creating a large quantity of corpses.

I must mention, Our "interview" was less an interview and more akin to a sideshow patter, introducing me to his operation in a way that was perhaps akin to a public reputation skit in its attempts to misdirect from any potential failings...

...Hm, I know a stage magician who might have advice on mitigating this matter, noted for later, but I digress. But I did notice some tells. 

The prospective torture schema, small scale though they seemed, bore a striking resemblance to the works of Trixoin, not simply in their pacing but even in the core "beats." This seemed to grant them a very confused quality, where they appeared to be emulating both Hell's standard facilities of torture with the methods of Trixoin but ultimately having the advantages of neither.

When asked about this, he paused for a moment, his jocular grin turned sour. Then, as I was about to follow up, the band began to play "Stars and Stripes Forever" very loudly, followed by him stating he could not hear my question and ushering me onward.

Though, I did notice the rapid movement of the crew, and the fact that certain refurbishments seemed somewhat slapdash as I moved through the location, almost Potempkin in quality.

I would have done a follow-up with Trixoin upon this issue, but she appeared to be out on business that an imp told me involved acquiring a large amount of explosives. Hm...

-Xavier X. Xolomon , Monsterologist and Understudy to The Librarian Of Babel

--------------------------------

You can probably tell I used a picture of a Joker action figure as a base for this one, and the vibes kinda followed from there to do that sort of "evil clown" thing.

Though, of course, they're a very different shitty clown than The Joker, less unhinged more ruthless plagarist and "entrepreneur," which I think at least turned out fun.

As per usual the whole descriptions, designs, ectcetera from this project are free to use as you see fit under a CC-BY 4.0 license so long as I; Thomas F. Johnson, am credited as their creator!

[non-binary-laurie-strode]

It is, once again, that time of the year! Friends, film queens, and everyone else who follows this blog for whatever reason—It is time for my Pink Bette film awards!

The Pink Bettes, if you are new or out of the loop, are my personal Oscars. They're named after Bette Davis and, of course, my favourite colour. Bettes can be awarded for anything—there are Bettes for my favourite performances, but also they can be given to cool creature designs, bad performances, bizarre line readings, overall weird movies, anything! For better or for worse, something with a Bette made an impact on me.

So let's start awarding! (Warning: Extremely long post. I had originally written a paragraph for each individual winner and got to ten single spaced pages before looking at the length in mute horror. As I write this, I am consciously cutting my commentary down because it's still getting too long!)

This Pink Bettes ceremony is dedicated to the almost 300 movies I watched or rewatched in 2023. A good portion of that came from my Universal Horror marathon, which ran from July through the end of October (with me adding a few extras in November). This is the second biggest year for movies for me since 2020, when that was The Thing We Did during covid quarantines. (I was only 30 or so movies away from topping 2020!)

Honestly, 2022 was not a good film year for me. I didn't feel much passion for it; I think I was beginning to burn out after the strain of 2020/21. My heart wasn't in it. And 2023 started that way for me too. But the Universal Horror marathon really did jumpstart my movie watching and reignited my passion and energy and love for film as an art. For as much as it may have melted my brain at points, that marathon inspired such joy and interest in me. And so, I've made a few alterations to the Pink Bettes this year to reflect that!

How This Works

In order to qualify for a Pink Bette, a movie be considered a "first watch" for me for the year 2023. This means something like our rewatches of the Child's Play (Chucky the killer doll) series are ineligible, because I watched those for the first time in 2019. I don't split the categories by gender, and I don't only have one winner per category; this is to celebrate all the films of the year, and there's room for everyone. Bettes can be for any category I have a whim to create. Many categories are labelled as "Favourite X" because I don't pretend to have haut taste or that I can pick the quantitative best performance. (Nor do I really believe a quantitative best performance is even possible, really.) At the very end, I also award my Keanu Reeves Awards For Slutty, Slutty Film Men—these are for the performances that left us all hot and bothered and filled with horny thoughts. Because we are sex-positive here and we love men.

This year only, I am creating a special subsection that I am dubbing "The Elsa Lanchester Awards," so named after Elsa Lanchester from The Bride of Frankenstein. This subsection is a sort of containment zone for my Universal Horror marathon movies—all movies in that marathon are assigned to the Elsas. Many of them were rewatches, and so they wouldn't qualify for the Bettes normally; however, this presents a problem—Many of those movies had their first watch pre-2019, when the first Bettes happened, and were thus never at all eligible for a Bette, some of them missing the cutoff by only a month or so. That should be corrected. Plus, this marathon was such a significant thing to me that I feel like it needed some recognition. Finally, reappraisals happen! Our opinions change. And so I decided to give the Universal Horror marathon movies a space to have their moment in the moonlight.

Format

Each category name will be in a larger font size; the Elsa categories will be clearly distinct. There may be a short description of the category, and then a list of the winners. Below that, I will talk a little about the various winners. Finally, there may be an honorary mention line.

And so—let's start!

Category Is: Biggest Surprise

Movies that I went into with low expectations and came away pleasantly surprised. They should have been bad movies, but they weren't!

Paranormal Activity 3 (2011)

Saw X (2023)

Five Nights At Freddy's (2023)

Paranormal Activity as a franchise is not good; the series is middling found footage movie one after another. (The entire found footage genre is low quality, low budget dreams with rare gems scattered thinly through it, let's be real.) PA3, however, has a very likeable protagonist, good scare effects, and some interesting use of the camera. Saw, as a series, is not one I am very partial to, and some of the later sequels are.... almost incomprehensible. I had absolutely no hope going into Saw X—and then walked out thinking it was one of the best horror movies of the year! How many franchises can say that the tenth installment is the definitive best one? Not many!

On the other hand...

Category Is: Biggest Disappointment

Movies I was excited to get to, often based on reputation, but which left me wanting much more.

The Goonies (1985)

30 Days of Night (2007)

As Above, So Below (2014)

WHY IS EVERYONE SHOUTING IN THE GOONIES THE WHOLE TIME? We were excited for baby Ke Huy Quan, but that movie was just a headache. As Above, So Below had so much potential and has a strong reputation, and it was the first movie that got permission from the French government to shoot in the legendary Parisian catacombs—and it's just a mid National Treasure kind of thing. Bleh.

Category Is: This Is Terrible; I Love It!

Eegah! (1962)

This award goes out to a very special movie that is absolutely unquestionably terrible, but I had great fun watching it. Usually I don't care much for "It's so bad it's good!" (usually it's Just Bad), but this truly takes the cake. This movie is about an ancient caveman that comes to life (the titular Eegah), and the young hip-for-the-50s-early-60s couple that he terrorises. Everything about this is wooden and flimsy. The dad self-financed this movie to push his son as an Elvis wannabe (including such lines as "I swear on my Elvis Presley EP!"), and... well, I don't think it was ever going to work out for them. There are bizarre musical interludes, some good jokes (*points to a cave painting* "This is from Grog's blue period.") But it's a trainwreck. I watched this with Elvira's Movie Macabre, and she had a field day too. It's an amazing time.

Category Is: I'm A Weirdo (Weirdest Movie)

Skinamarink (2023)

If you know, you know. This is by far the oddest little movie of 2023. It's supposed to be liminal horror, very soft and whispered and weird camera angles, and nightmare logic, a confused and buried plot... It's indescribable. Some people hated it; some people felt very seen by it. I feel like it's almost something of an ink blot test in movie form, where your brain either fills in the missing spaces with horror or it doesn't. Mine did not.

Category Is: Musical Pro-Shot/Concert Film

Over the course of the year, but especially in the second half, we got to see quite a few musicals (and a particular concert...) in the movie theatre. We are, of course, former musical theatre queens, and so we went to as many as we could.

Waitress (2023 Pro-Shot)

The Eras Tour (2023 Concert)

I fully cried through the entirety of the second act of Waitress. What fun and heartbreak that show is. And well, Miss Swift certainly does put on a show! The lighting design too was very impressive.

Category Is: Favourite Miyazaki

Starting in March, our theatre had a Ghibli Fest that led up to The Boy and The Heron being released in December. Each month, they'd play one or two Miyazaki movies, and we were very enthusastic about going!

Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind (1984)

Spirited Away (2001)

Ponyo (2008)

Okay, the last two are also grandfathered in because I last saw them in like 2017/18. But all of these are delightful and incredible in different ways.

Category Is: Line Readings That Live In My Head Rent-Free

[Spooky Win] Eva Moore, The Old Dark House (1932) — "NO BEDS!! THEY CAN'T HAVE ANY BEDS!! NO BEDS!!"

Alan Rickman, Galaxy Quest (1999) — "By Grabthar's hammer, what a savings." / "By Grabthar's hammer, by the suns of Worvan, you shall be avenged."

Brittany Murphy, Riding In Cars With Boys (2001) — "My doightas a tramp! MY DOIGHTAS A TRAAAAMP!"

Kathy Bates, sort of, in the most roundabout way in Rat Race (2001) — "You shoulda bought a cocka-doodie squirrel!"

Mia Goth, Infinity Pool (2023) — "JAAAAAAMESYYYY" and "ATTENTION PEOPLE OF THE BUS"

Rosamund Pike, Saltburn (2023) — "Times New Roman."

Margot Robbie, Barbie (2023) — "I'm not a fascist! I don't control the railways or the flow of commerce!"

Brittany Murphy killed us with that line. Drew Barrymore's character wants to practice with Brittany Murphy, practice telling her parents that she's a pregnant teen. She tells Brittany, and... Brittany explodes, in the middle of the street, screaming at her. And she's like, well, you have to be ready for that!

The Kathy Bates one needs to be explained. So.... that is not a line that is spoken in the movie; it isn't even in the movie. It's a mutant phrase that we made up based on a similar line that is written down in Rat Race but filtered through her character in Misery (1991). That's just how we are!

Category Is: Favourite Wardrobe

Barbie (2023)

Truly, all of her outfits are amazing. My personal favourite is that look that she's wearing when she returns to Barbieland and finds that the Kens have taken over.

Category Is: Creature Design

Godzilla Minus One (2023)

There have been a lot of Godzillas over the decades. But this one? This one looked so cool, especially when it charges up to do its beam attack.

Category Is: Visual Aesthetic

Profondo Rosso (Deep Red) (1975)

Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992)

Poor Things (2023)

I'm most interested in Poor Things here: I cannot ever get over those skies. Beyond that, the camera work, the design of the world, the clothes, it's all so specific and delightfully weird.

Category Is: Gayyyy

Movies that centre around being gay and gay experiences.

Carol (2015)

Eileen (2023)

Dante & Artistotle Discover The Secrets Of The Universe (2022)

Yay lesbians! We love them!

And now, to take a spooky detour into the Elsas—

Spooky Category Is: Directorial Achievement

James Whale: Frankenstein, The Old Dark House, The Invisible Man, The Bride of Frankenstein

Jack Arnold: It Came From Outer Space, The Creature From The Black Lagoon, Revenge of the Creature, Tarantula, The Incredible Shrinking Man, The Space Children, Monster on the Campus

Both of these directors were artists whose work I admired pretty much across the board. They have style, they have a point of view, and I would some day like to do deep dives on them!

Spooky Category Is: The Joan Crawford Award For Especial Awfulness

The Mummy's Tomb (1942)

Captive Wild Woman (1943)

I have only awarded The Joan Crawford once, to The Purge, because I hated it and its ideology so much. This year, I found two new Especially Awful movies to add to that list. Both of these movies truly made me question if I wanted to keep going with the Universal Horror marathon, they were that bad. The Paula the Ape Woman series (of which Captive Wild Woman is the first) in particular made me stop for a week because I lost faith in the process!

Spooky Category Is: Supporting Performance

Elsa Lanchester, The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)

Una O'Connor, The Bride of Frankenstein (1935) + The Invisible Man (1933)

O. P. Heggie, The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)

Ernest Thesiger, The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)

Boris Karloff, The Raven (1935)

Edward Van Sloan, Dracula (1931) + Dracula's Daughter (1936)

Eva Moore, The Old Dark House (1932)

Joan Weldon, Them! (1954)

Mara Corday, Tarantula (1955)

Joanna Moore, Monster on the Campus (1958)

I promise I did not make this category just for The Bride of Frankenstein!! I just have a lot of Feelings about that movie this year!! (I only named the entire subsection after Elsa Lanchester herself.)

Spooky Category Is: Lead Performance

Bela Lugosi, Dracula (1931) + The Raven (1935)

Claude Rains, The Invisible Man (1933)

Boris Karloff, The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)

Gloria Holden, Dracula's Daughter (1936)

Simone Simon, Cat People (1940)

Martin Kosleck, House of Horrors (1946)

Rondo Hatton, House of Horrors (1946)

Charles Laughton, The Strange Door (1951)

Lori Nelson, Revenge of the Creature (1955)

Grant Williams, The Incredible Shrinking Man (1957)

We were in Spirit Halloween this past October, and I remember looking up at a cardboard sign that had Boris Karloff's face, giant and in his monster look, which was glaring down at us. And it just struck me that some of these performances (Bela Lugosi and Boris Karloff in this category in particular) have just been iconic for literally a century. All the bad vampire impressions go back to Bela's Dracula. One of the most enduring monsters is Frankenstein's monster and the way Boris Karloff represented him. And I just think that's wonderful.

Spooky Category Is: Overall Favourites

The Phantom of the Opera (1925)

The Cat and the Canary (1927)

Dracula (1931)

The Old Dark House (1932)

The Invisible Man (1933)

The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)

The Raven (1935)

Cat People (1940)

Tarantula (1955)

The Incredible Shrinking Man (1957)

Many of these need no explanation: They are classics for a reason. What I do want to draw attention to is that there are two silent films on this list! I watched The Phantom of the Opera from 1925 with, I believe, the 1927 scoring, and it was simply wonderful, especially the very early-tech technicolour masquerade scene. Same with The Cat and the Canary, a silent spooky comedy that I loved. I've always been... interested? I suppose? In trying to get into silent films more and never really actually doing it. And the book that I was following just went straight into them. Sometimes you just have to do things!

Anyway, that's the end of the Elsas, which means we can get back to the main body of the Bettes and give out their big awards!

Category Is: Supporting Performance

Alan Rickman, Galaxy Quest (1999)

Brittany Murphy, Riding in Cars with Boys (2001)

Logan Lerman, Riding in Cars with Boys (2001)

Samantha Sloyan, Midnight Mass (2021)

Kerry Condon, The Banshees of Inisherin (2022)

Barry Keoghan, The Banshees of Inisherin (2022)

Dominique Blanc, L'Origine du mal (2023)

Ryan Gosling, Barbie (2023)

Rosamund Pike, Saltburn (2023)

Taraji P. Henson, The Color Purple (2023)

Danielle Brooks, The Color Purple (2023)

I'll admit, I was a little on the fence about Ryan Gosling a week ago—was he actually that good? But then we rewatched it, and yes, it's an excellent comedic side role; he did wonderfully.

Samantha Sloyan for Mike Flanagan's Midnight Mass was so good that I had to break my own rule about this being cinéma only and allow in a television series performance. (And let's be real, it's Netflix, the line has already been blurred extremely.)

But I really want to talk about Taraji and Danielle Brooks. Those two are just so so so wonderful. Taraji in that red look, when she's about to perform? That might be one of my favourite images of the whole year. And Danielle Brooks has such charm and such warmth; I'm not surprised they wanted her to come with the role after doing it on Broadway.

Category Is: Lead Performance

Judy Garland, The Clock (1945)

Michelle Yeoh, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000)

Zhang Ziyi, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000)

Rosamund Pike, Gone Girl (2014)

Cate Blanchett, Carol (2015)

Margot Robbie, Barbie (2023)

Marin Ireland, Birth/Rebirth (2023)

Judy Reyes, Birth/Rebirth (2023)

Lily Gladstone, Killers of the Flower Moon (2023)

Ryunosuke Kamiki, Godzilla Minus One (2023)

Emma Stone, Poor Things (2023)

I'm sorry, I could not get this down to ten. I actually started this list with TWENTY THREE that I wanted here! All of them are so deserving! And I could not cut it beyond these—I mean!! JUDY! Michelle and Zhang Ziyi! "I'm so much happier now that I'm dead, technically missing!" CATE! The Barbie herself! Our mad scientist and the most determined mother on the planet! Lily!! The most sad little meow meow who has ever had to stand up to Godzilla! And one of the best character performances I have ever seen!

And most of them are this year! What an amazing year of amazing performances.

Category Is: Favourite Horror

Scream 6 (2023)

Birth/Rebirth (2023)

Saw X (2023)

Five Nights At Freddy's (2023)

Hell House LLC Origins: The Carmichael Manor (2023)

Do you think I liked the new horror releases of 2023? Half of these I didn't even expect to like! I'm so happy especially that Hell House turned out well; we LOVE the first one and enjoy~tolerate the second and third, so we weren't quite sure how we'd feel about the fourth. But it's soooo good!

Category Is: Favourite Comedy

Galaxy Quest (1999)

You Hurt My Feelings (2023)

Barbie (2023)

Anyone But You (2023)

Poor Things (2023)

Okay, and 4/5 of these are 2023 too. We're both spooky and funny this year, I guess. Three of these actually came in the last month of the year for us—Anyone But You and Poor Things were December releases, and we didn't get to You Hurt My Feelings until December.

Category Is: Favourite Drama

Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind (1984)

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000)

Panic Room (2002)

Gone Girl (2014)

Godzilla Minus One (2023)

Well I guess this category is more "David Fincher thriller-dramas are my kind of thing" plus "Asian excellence."

Category Is: THE Favourites Of The Year

Birth/Rebirth (2023)

Poor Things (2023)

Godzilla Minus One (2023)

These three are my absolute tops of the year. I get so excited just thinking about them!

Birth/Rebirth is such a smart take on Frankenstein and has two incredible lead performances. It's wet and horrifying, it's funny, it's just perfect. Poor Things: Emma Stone is a revelation. She has such perfect physical comedy. The whole movie looks beautiful. And Godzilla is an incredible, moving epic with perfect emotion and a brilliant creature design to boot.

Anyway. Enough of that respectable stuff.

The Keanu Reeves Awards For Slutty, Slutty Film Men

For appearences that made yours truly filled with horny thoughts.

Keanu Reeves, Point Break (1991)

Early 90s Keanu showing full ass. I watched it on Valentine's Day just for Keanu and got THAT! I was delighted.

2. John Bromfield, Revenge of the Creature (1955)

I watched the Creature movies for the creature, of course.

3. Kyle MacLachlan, Showgirls (1995)

Had to edit the front-facing one because I was scared tumblr was going to flag it. But let's just say you can see some shaft.

4. Paul Mescal, Aftersun (2022)

He's just that that whole ass out, huh?

5. Ryan Gosling, Barbie (2023)

I remember when the first look at Barbie came out and people were being SO annoying about him and how he looks. And I think he looks delicious!

6. Simu Liu, Barbie (2023)

I would love to watch them beach off together, personally.

7. Josh Hutcherson, Five Nights At Freddy's (2023)

Whatever you say beautiful dot gif.

8. Barry Keoghan, Saltburn (2023)

The scene that shook the internet. Of course, there's more to see, if you know what I mean, but I'm not about to get this post flagged.

9. Glen Powell, Anyone But You (2023)

More like Anyone Butt You, am I right? He has a bit the credits where he just fully bent over. But I couldn't find that with a quick search. Alas!

Anyway. For realsies, if you made it this far, thank you for reading my word salad. These things always end up a little longer than I mean for them to. I am naturally verbose in writing and I was very excited about films for this year!

[ao3feed-hawks]

L.O.V: RELOADED!

L.O.V: RELOADED! by AlyTheLostSoul

(PLEASE PAY ATTENTION TO THE WARNINGS IN THE TAGS, THEY WILL BE IMPORTANT LATER There will be warnings in the chapter notes as well but use this as a guide This will be updated Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays)

The final version/rewrite of my League of Villains chat fic that follows after Kamino Ward following the chaos that comes about when the group winds up with a bunch of heroes/people trying to redeem them on the team

Seriously, what could possibly go wrong? It's not like they're going to get attached to the new number 2 hero and try to figure out what the government agency that raised him had been doing to him for the past say 15 years or so

Oh wait, fuck

-Plot is slow going, do not expect us to get to the main point quickly. Hawks' arc starts in like chapter 5 and goes though like the whole fic, he doesn't become a main piece of the plot for awhile even though he is the catalyst of it

So just keep it in mind that while that description does explain the main plot, we won't get there for a little while as we have to get through a few mini arcs and buildup -This isn't a full chat fic, a lot of chapters go out of chat form. Such as 4, 5, 10)

Words: 1123, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: Gen

Characters: Kurogiri, Shigaraki Tomura | Shimura Tenko, Toga Himiko, Iguchi Shuuichi | Spinner, Sako Atsuhiro | Mr. Compress, Hikiishi Kenji | Magne, Dabi | Todoroki Touya, Bubaigawara Jin | Twice, Takami Keigo | Hawks, Ashido Mina, Midoriya Izuku, Usagiyama Rumi | Miruko, Todoroki Enji | Endeavor, Other Character Tags to Be Added

Relationships: Ashido Mina/Toga Himiko, Iguchi Shuuichi | Spinner/Takami Keigo | Hawks

Additional Tags: I'm back fuckers!, okay okay that was aggressive, But I've been holding this rewrite in my drafts for like a month so, League of Villains as Family, Found Family is the best fanfiction trope and I will die on that hill, Parental Kurogiri, Parental Sako Atsuhiro | Mr. Compress, Magne is also parental but there's not a tag for that, Trying not to spoil the fic in the tags, Ashido Mina is a neutral party, Midoriya is here for redemption only, Hawks does not know what the fuck he is, Takami Keigo | Hawks Acts Like a Bird, Well more than that, has a whole bunch of bird traits THAT I DID RESEARCH FOR, I have a whole bunch of knowledge on hawk hunting patterns and idk how I feel about that, The ships don't matter, Can be read without acknowledging them, Spinner and Hawks are shipped mostly because of mutant reasons, Like you don't have completely random reasons for why you ship things, I thought it worked don't @ me, Miruko is going to beat the shit out of Hawks if he doesn't explain shit to her, Good thing he has security, A random plot point is that Miruko and Best Jeanist are roommates, They're also designers/tailors, It doesn't come up too much so I wanted to put it here, Everyone Needs A Hug, Everyone Is Alive, warnings, PAY ATTENTION TO THE NEXT FEW TAGS, THIS IS RATED FOR THESE, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Suicide Attempt, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Anorexia, Implied/Referenced Abuse, I took an abnormal psych class last semester, and passed, read all chapter notes carefully if something is written there, You'll understand the mature warning eventually, Please read with caution, I am so sorry, chat fic, mostly, Mostly Gen

Read Here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43449871

[ao3feed-bnha-girls]

L.O.V: RELOADED!

L.O.V: RELOADED! by AlyTheLostSoul

(PLEASE PAY ATTENTION TO THE WARNINGS IN THE TAGS, THEY WILL BE IMPORTANT LATER There will be warnings in the chapter notes as well but use this as a guide This will be updated Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays)

The final version/rewrite of my League of Villains chat fic that follows after Kamino Ward following the chaos that comes about when the group winds up with a bunch of heroes/people trying to redeem them on the team

Seriously, what could possibly go wrong? It's not like they're going to get attached to the new number 2 hero and try to figure out what the government agency that raised him had been doing to him for the past say 15 years or so

Oh wait, fuck

-Plot is slow going, do not expect us to get to the main point quickly. Hawks' arc starts in like chapter 5 and goes though like the whole fic, he doesn't become a main piece of the plot for awhile even though he is the catalyst of it

So just keep it in mind that while that description does explain the main plot, we won't get there for a little while as we have to get through a few mini arcs and buildup -This isn't a full chat fic, a lot of chapters go out of chat form. Such as 4, 5, 10)

Words: 1123, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: Gen

Characters: Kurogiri, Shigaraki Tomura | Shimura Tenko, Toga Himiko, Iguchi Shuuichi | Spinner, Sako Atsuhiro | Mr. Compress, Hikiishi Kenji | Magne, Dabi | Todoroki Touya, Bubaigawara Jin | Twice, Takami Keigo | Hawks, Ashido Mina, Midoriya Izuku, Usagiyama Rumi | Miruko, Todoroki Enji | Endeavor, Other Character Tags to Be Added

Relationships: Ashido Mina/Toga Himiko, Iguchi Shuuichi | Spinner/Takami Keigo | Hawks

Additional Tags: I'm back fuckers!, okay okay that was aggressive, But I've been holding this rewrite in my drafts for like a month so, League of Villains as Family, Found Family is the best fanfiction trope and I will die on that hill, Parental Kurogiri, Parental Sako Atsuhiro | Mr. Compress, Magne is also parental but there's not a tag for that, Trying not to spoil the fic in the tags, Ashido Mina is a neutral party, Midoriya is here for redemption only, Hawks does not know what the fuck he is, Takami Keigo | Hawks Acts Like a Bird, Well more than that, has a whole bunch of bird traits THAT I DID RESEARCH FOR, I have a whole bunch of knowledge on hawk hunting patterns and idk how I feel about that, The ships don't matter, Can be read without acknowledging them, Spinner and Hawks are shipped mostly because of mutant reasons, Like you don't have completely random reasons for why you ship things, I thought it worked don't @ me, Miruko is going to beat the shit out of Hawks if he doesn't explain shit to her, Good thing he has security, A random plot point is that Miruko and Best Jeanist are roommates, They're also designers/tailors, It doesn't come up too much so I wanted to put it here, Everyone Needs A Hug, Everyone Is Alive, warnings, PAY ATTENTION TO THE NEXT FEW TAGS, THIS IS RATED FOR THESE, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Suicide Attempt, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Anorexia, Implied/Referenced Abuse, I took an abnormal psych class last semester, and passed, read all chapter notes carefully if something is written there, You'll understand the mature warning eventually, Please read with caution, I am so sorry, chat fic, mostly, Mostly Gen

Read Here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43449871

[ch4tk4t]

Comics Fangirl n°4 - Fangirl X

This review is about "Earth X #0"/1999

Plot by Alex Ross & Jim Krueger

Art by Alex Ross, John Paul Leon, Bill Reinhold and Matt Hollingsworth

Welcome back, my muties 💙 Did you miss me? What do you mean "no"?

Today's review is about the beginning of what is often called the "Earth X trilogy".

The comic starts with a short narration by this universe's Aaron Stack, Machine Man. Quite "à propos" for a character created by our lord and master Jack Kirby for a "2001 a space odyssey" comic adaptation, he is visited by his own black monolith.

He is then almost instantly transported to the moon by none other than Uatu, the watcher. He strips him of his "humanity", forcing him to expose his artifical nature. He reinforces that transformation by refusing to address him by his human name, calling him "X-51" instead.

Uatu then proceeds to recount the birth of the human race, following the Celestial's tampering with humanity's genome, "planting a seed". When Aaron contests Uatu's cold description of events, the watcher talks down to him like he would a child. Aaron holds on to his humanity and can't help but confront the watcher on details he disagrees on. The watcher tries his best to force a cold analysis of how the "Age of Heroes" was prepared for by the Celestials and is all part of a grand design. According to him, the events that changed the Fantastic Four, Spider-Man, and all the others, only resulted in them gaining their abilities because of the "Celestial seed". By Uatu's account, there are no "accidents", only a master plan that spans millenias.

Uatu continues his description, arriving to what is, at the time of writting "present day". The Watcher tells Aaron he brought him here for a reason. Ironically for a watcher, Uatu cannot see anymore. He needs someone whose mind won't melt in the face of the massive amounts of info to process as a watcher, and Aaron, who he insists on dehumanizing, seems like the perfect candidate...

This concludes the first volume of a saga that spans three dense series. The story starts slow, but trust me it goes places,and covers just about everything in the Marvel catalog at the time.

Ever wondered what's up with the divinities in the Marvel universe? What difference is there between mutants and the rest of the super-powered population? All that and more is addressed in this "trilogy". The themes touched upon are "What defines humanity?", "can we control fate?", "what is right or wrong, and do such notions matter in the grand scheme of things?".

Needless to say, if you're looking for some easy reading with light, superficial themes (*kof*MCU*kof*), this is not the series for you. This is comics at their best, full of pathos and philosophical explorations. In my opinion, this is a fantastically written book, on par with the original Watchmen and the likes.

I give this comic a Dystopia/10

Talk to you later, true believers!

Fangirl out.

[tranthologies]

EPISODE HIGHLIGHT: OF THE STORM

Today we're highlighting our 16th episode of Season 1: "Of the Storm"    

it's got werewolves, german accents, and true names

you can find it wherever you get your podcasts! (if not, pls let us know!)

https://shows.acast.com/tranthologies/episodes/of-the-storm

Image description below the cut

Slide 1: A blue-grey background. In black lettering, a title reads: "Of the Storm" In the centre of the page, there is the cover art for this episode. It pictures snowy mountains against a red sky. The cover art has arrows pointing away from it with text coming off them. The text coming off the arrows reads as the following: "1. Oops, all religious trauma! 2. Sapphics with swords 3. Horror with a happy ending 4. True names = magic 5. Werewolves are inherently transgender, change my mind 6. Did i mention sapphics with SWORDS There is snow across the top of the page.

Slide 2: A blue-grey background. There is a design of a piece of paper in the centre of the page. On the paper, text reads: “The apothecary’s daughter and the blacksmith’s apprentice have been best friends for as long as anyone can remember, but the blacksmith’s apprentice is hiding a secret. A tale of true names, of subtle poisons, and of witch hunters with silvered blades unspools when it’s dragged into the moonlight- a tale the apothecary’s daughter recounts many years later.” There is snow across the whole page, and two wolves at the bottom of the page.

Slide 3: A blue-grey background. Covering most of the page, there is a design of white lined paper. On the paper, an excerpt from the episode reads: “Osanna: She could feel the breath of the creature, hot as the flames of the forge, air cold and black and tearing at her skin and lungs like frostbite. It was almost impossible to run in the hungry snow- the banks swallowed up her ankles, and she stumbled again and again, but was always quick to scramble to her feet, ice stinging her hands. In stories, people cannot feel pain when they are running from a monster- fear is supposed to take over, but she felt every tear of thorns against her skin, every stabbing breath in her lungs. She was simply too terrified to stop. She ran until she reached the village, and, slipping on the icy cobblestones, banged on the doors of houses as she passed, crying for help.” There is snow down the right side of the page.

Slide 4: A blue-grey  background. In the centre of the page, there is a design of white lined paper. On the paper, the credits read: “CREW: Written by Sorren Briarwood. Directed by L M Clohessy and Morgan Greensmith. Audio editing by Miri Newman. Music by Eden J. Storm. Cover art by Ari Moloney. CAST: Emma Johanna Puranen as Osanna. Moira-Juliet "MJ" Scott as Stürmisch. J.R. Steele as Clove. Rowan van Grinsven as the Priest. Grace Rurka as the Hexenjäger.” There is snow across the whole page, and a wolf in the top left corner.

[sarah-dipitous]

Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2033 Day 79

On the Head of a Pin/Blink

Only REALLY REALLY great episodes today

“On the Head of a Pin”

Plot Description: Castiel and Uriel capture Alastair and ask Dean to torture him with skills he learned in Hell

Would I Survive the First Five Minutes??: I mean…could any human survive this crash?? A whole ass angel died, what chance do I have??

I love that we start with Cas, but does it bode well for my commentary skills? Absolutely not

I don’t want to say it’s so EASY for Sam to say “well, get angry!” In response to Dean saying he’s tired of burying friends, but fucking damn…it’s so easy for him to say that when he’s not been doing this as long and been able to take years off for college.

I thought Cas was the one in charge between him and Uriel. But you can already see Castiel questioning the grand plan…

“Uriel is the funniest angel in the garrison. Ask anyone” said in a completely stone cold tone is….i fucking love him

Mmmmm so he was kind of demoted for getting to close and sympathetic to Dean the Winchesters

God I really hate Sam right now…Dean’s not weak, you asshole

Everyone is pissing me off. Alastair taunting Dean for what he did to him, what he did to John, how “easily” Dean broke

And Castiel can tell this isn’t right. It’s not right to ask this of Dean, to ask a human, the human they saved from Hell to torture a demon

YO. SAM. Wtf my dude??

Anna!!! Thank you, Anna, for trying to talk some sense into Cas

Oh, Cas… you should listen to her. This is WRONG, and you KNOW IT

Deeeeeeeeeeeean breaking the first seal is breaking my heart.

Ok. He got off the rack, but…that thing was sabotaged. Who sabotaged it, though???

Cas coming in to save Dean, and Sam coming to save both of them (I mean, mostly Dean, but Cas is there too).

Cas is so disturbed, as he should be, that Sam can straight up KILL demons now. Yeah, you two need to talk……….

I love dramatic lighting through slats in blinds…just beautiful

Cas calling on Anna for someone to follow, someone to believe in…and her refusing to be that person because he needs to think for himself. Good for both of them, honestly. Difficult, yes, but the correct thing to do

Uriel, WHYYYYYY. He wants to raise Lucifer himself? On one hand, he’s got the same doubts Castiel has. And honestly, I can understand his logic. Lucifer was one of if not God’s favorite. He was beautiful and powerful, and if you’ve been doubting the existence of God but you’re beings designed to follow, the next best thing would be the next powerful being. On the other, it IS THE DEVIL FROM THE BIBLE

Rip Uriel

I like they already have a little banter between them and the honesty between the two. Truthfully, even without anything else, this scene in the hospital would be enough to convert me to a Destiel shipper. It’s hard to see Dean doubt himself and call himself weak, but you can also already tell how much Castiel already believes in him. And when Dean…we’ll call it asks Cas to stay and actually finish their conversation (“don’t you go disappearing on my you son of a bitch” counts, yeah??) and then he DOES?? I’m fine. I’m normal about this…

“Been On My Mind…”: the whole Sam and Ruby thing is very much going on 10

"Blink"

Plot Description: In an old, abandoned house, the Weeping Angels wait. When people start disappearing, Sally must decode the cryptic messages from a mysterious stranger called the Doctor before she can save the day

(i have a feeling i won't have a lot to say in this episode based purely on the lack of Ten and Martha. i think it's gonna be a lot of "Girl, NO!"s and "RUN"s and "GET OUT OF THERE"s, but we'll see)

It's such a solid opening. The messages written on the wall about the weeping angels and for her to duck. Just...REALLY GOOD.

God. Remember when we used to have our phones NOT on silent all the time? and how ringtones were a Thing TM??

Sad...is happy? for deep people? This...really was written in the mid '00s.

Not to link Good Omens to this....no, Good Omens was already linked to this show because DAVID TENNANT. But why DO the British have this trope of delivering letters to places on very specific days, at very specific times years and decades (maybe even centuries) in the future?

I LOVE the weird screeching music when the angels are around

It's amazing how terrifying they've made statues.

Blink is actually physical media propaganda. We need to invest in it again.

Wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff....yes!!

Wait...how did they get to that garage that quickly?? Wouldn't we have seen them in the background.....like, i know they move fast, but THAT FAST?? doN'T BLINK, DUDE!!! he hasn't even watched the 17 DVD extras. THIS is why we need to bring back physical media

The "game" the guys in this episode have is just.......not it. Then again, it was written by Steven Moffat, so are we surprised?

Ok. Good. It's weird even in 2007 that she's only got 17 DVDs.

The conversation between Sally and the Doctor in the TV is still just BRILLIANT. It's SO FUCKING CLEVER.

DON'T DO IT. DON'T DO IT, MAN. DON'T BLINK. PLEASE. Okay. But also like...do they forget you exist when you're not around them?

Just an absolutely tremendous and terrifying scene when they angels turn out the light.

I really wanna know what was happening that the Doctor and Martha are running around with a bow and a quiver of arrows.

Episodes Since the Doctor's Last Attempted Genocide: 7