#I could probably write essays on essays on essays about this film and all the diverse different topics that spring from the well of it

[parkercore-69]

thank you J.R.R. Tolkien for writing the most devastating romantic subplot in your lotr books without even realising it

[island-in-the-shadows]

Hi! Fellow Saltburn enthusiast here! I have a question, and I’ve actually already sent it to a couple of accounts who also write extensively about Saltburn. I’d love to hear your views!

Why do you think Oliver didn’t try to kidnap/imprison/blackmail Felix into being with him instead of just jumping to murder? He was clearly capable of manipulation and probably could have found a way to keep an unwilling Felix around if he managed to get away with so many murders? I feel like even in the haze of desperation and panic it sort of should’ve struck him that killing Felix meant a lifetime of misery? It wasn’t exactly a spur of the moment kill, there was some amount of premeditation involved. I was honestly confused at how quickly Oliver made a decision that basically ensured he’d never feel a sliver of happiness ever again. How did he even manage to sleep after, knowing what he had done to Felix? The whole sequence where they look for Felix and eventually find the body is so gut wrenching to me. The music, the foreboding, the cinematography ughhhh.

Thanks for the ask anon! Ok so, I'm going to break this down in sections because there's a few different points to tackle!

Oliver does have the capability of doing horrible things, but I also do not think he's a great planner. He can only think ahead so much. And while I think that he could, arguably, find a way to kidnap Felix or find a way to blackmail him, this is contrary to what I think his goal is. I quote Cheap Trick (though I prefer the Letters to Cleo version): "I want you to want me/I need you to need me/ I'd love you to love me/ I'm beggin' you to beg me." Oliver isn't like the one guy from 365, he wants Felix to cede of his own accord and his own will. Yes, there is a level of emotional manipulation re: the lies about his family. However, I do think that when Oliver says: "I'm still the same person!" he is right. Outside of the way in which he hooked Felix, he would have no reason to be different. Stands to reason, in my opinion, that he is who he is with Felix bar exaggerations and implications of his past.

Let's talk about murder...Oliver only murdered Elspeth. He facilitated the deaths of Felix and Venetia. Murder not only requires intent, it requires certainty beyond a reasonable doubt of direct action. I was raised by lawyers so I view things through that lens. At most, if we were going by American law, which is the one I know, he would arguably fall under the category of voluntary manslaughter. Why? Because he did not directly do an act which led to Felix and Venetia's deaths. Rather, he put the dominos in place and that can be classed as a provocation; he provoked them in a way that led to their deaths. (Note: I am not delulu, I am aware that all of this is wrong. I'm just trying to put it forth from a legal POV.)

When it comes to Felix, he hastily put cocaine in the champagne and I do not think he thought it through way in advance. Secondly, he had the bottle in his hand for large parts of the maze conversation and deciding to give it to Felix was a spur of the moment action. Third, he had no way of knowing whether Felix would drink or not. Fourthly, Felix had ALREADY been doing drugs and you cannot specifically pinpoint, beyond a reasonable doubt, that it was the little bit of cocaine he drank (which, from research, would actually have been less potent and less quick to get into Felix's bloodstream than the lines he snorted) that caused him to OD. Fifthly, I am not entirely convinced that Oliver knew it was going to foolproof kill Felix. The way he wakes up the morning after still has the stink of hope. So, I can't be certain either way if his intent was to kill or to simply cause Felix to OD to the point he was taken to a hospital and then Ollie could Nurse Nightingale the situation.

When it comes to Venetia, Oliver did not tell her to use the razors. He placed the razors on the tub. He did so relatively impulsively (likely, imo in a bit of rage) and at the last minute. He had absolutely no way of knowing whether Venetia would take the razors and he had no way of knowing that she would use them in a deadly way rather than in a way to hurt herself but not kill. Further, from the bit that we get of the crime scene in the bathroom (I did pause it so I kinda memorised), there is no indication in the scene that Oliver was actually the one to use the razors. The scene would look entirely different and his clothes would be soiled or he would have blood on him, etc.

That being said, Oliver's desperation and panic and anxiety regarding the situation with Felix likely led him to the following thought: he would rather exist in a world where Felix ceases to exist, than exist in a world where he is inexorably removed from Felix. Felix was and continues to be Oliver's whole world. He likely thought that he was going to lose Felix either way. But, in Felix dying, he and Felix stay inherently connected. He can leave Saltburn but now he and Felix are forever linked. Elspeth, for example, automatically associates Oliver with Felix. It's why Oliver knew he had an in with her all those years later. Further, and I think I wrote this elsewhere, Felix's headstone will ALWAYS have Felix's date of birth, and the date of Oliver's 20th birthday. They are linked in this way as well.

I think it was all very rushed and confused when he did any of it. I think there might've been a chance for him and Felix even in the sense of friendship. But Oliver reacted emotionally and impulsively. He didn't plan putting the cocaine in the bottle probably until a couple of minutes before he did it. He didn't plan the thing with Venetia. He didn't plan getting Saltburn from the start. The only thing he planned and orchestrated was a Romcom style meet-cute. That was it. The rest he made up as he went along from noticing all the little details about Felix. But ultimately, above all, this weird little man wanted to be wanted and wanted to be loved by the object of his affection. Forcing the matter with kidnapping and/or blackmail was not going to get him what he truly wanted anymore than Felix's death did.

How does he manage to sleep? Self-medication, certainly. Pretty sure he yo-yo's uppers and downers like crazy. Coke to dance like the lonely mad king he is in the afternoon, Xanny or weed at night to come down and sleep. What's more, Saltburn is an extension of Felix and it, likely, comforts him to be in a place that represents Felix. A place that is haunted by the ghosts of memories he shared with Felix to which we are not privy.

Also, yes. Finding Felix's corpse, the whole scene, is stunning and staggering and heartbreaking. Absolutely stunning film craft involved all the way around.

Sorry for the loooong response, but I am a lawyer's daughter and an English Literature major, so I had to write my mini essay with some level of (certainly biased) evidentiary support.

[timetravellingkitty]

SAPPHIC ARTISTS TO LISTEN TO

(instead of writing your 69th essay about how Taylor Swift is a closet lesbian)

Starting off with my holy trinity:

Rina Sawayama (she/her, bi/pan): if you follow me you're probably aware of what a huge Rina fan I am. Lots of pop and rock, with a chunk of her earlier songs being R&B. Her debut album SAWAYAMA (my favourite album of all time!!) was her major breakthrough moment as it received critical acclaim and her sophomore album Hold the Girl made her the highest charting Japanese artist in the history of the UK. Known for her musical versatility, she made her acting debut in John Wick 4. I recommend: Cherry, Frankenstein and Bad Friend

Janelle Monáe (she/they, bi/pan): pop, funk, neo-soul and psychedelic. They have an entire series of concept albums about an android named Cindy Mayweather (her ALTER EGO?!) as she commits the crime of falling in love with a human. Lots of social commentary. Her album Dirty Computer comes along with a narrative film and a book taking place in its world. She's starred in movies like Antebellum, Glass Onion and Moonlight. I recommend: Electric Lady, Django Jane and Pynk

Raveena Aurora (she/her, bi): Experimental pop, R&B and soul. Her second album Asha's Awakening is a concept album following the journey of Asha, a Punjabi space princess, as it explores Aurora's South Asian identity and past relationships. Such a beautiful and soft voice to die for. I recommend: Headaches, If Only and Kathy Left 4 Kathmandu

Moving onto some other artists I like:

Boygenius: a band comprising of three sapphic women- Phoebe Bridgers (indie darling™), Lucy Dacus and Julien Baker (the first two are bi while the third is a lesbian). Indie, folk and alternative rock. Very melancholic. I urge you to check out their individual projects too (especially Phoebe's, I love her Punisher album). I recommend: Emily I'm Sorry, Satanist and True Blue

Kelela (she/her, queer): R&G, electronic and alternative R&B. Her debut EP Hallucinogen covers the beginning, middle and end of a relationship in reverse chronological order. Her second album Raven showcases Black futuristic art, which I fuck with. I recommend: Contact, The High and Bluff

Zolita (she/her, lesbian): dark-pop, R&B and electropop. She incorporates witchcraft into her music and mvs. She literally has an EP called Sappho what more could you want? I recommend: Holy, Ashley (the sapphic Speak Now) and Bedspell

Victoria Monét (she/her, bi): pop and R&B. She's written songs for artists like Ariana Grande (7 Rings) and Chloe x Halle (Do It). Go stream her Jaguar EP you will thank me later. I recommend: Touch Me (erotic sapphic song), Cupid and Love U Better

And finally some honourable mentions (can't make this post too long now can I): mxmtoon, Michelle Zauner, Arooj Aftab, Sir Babygirl, Dodie, Chloe Moriondo, Lauren Jauregui, Baby Queen, Sara and Teagan, The Butchies, Sofya Wang and Melissa Etheridge

[joe-spookyy]

What is the Gay subtext between David Kissler and Jack Goodman ?

so the subtext in this one is not super overt like it is in like. reanimator. but it’s definitely there. first i’ll start with the basics. full essay under the cut.

now, the werewolf is one of the easiest classic monsters to read as queer. i mean, it’s right there. someone who walks among “normal” people, who are completely unaware that this person carries a “dark secret” that sets them apart from everyone else. i could be talking about this person’s status as a werewolf. i could also be talking about their queer identity that they choose not to disclose. the idea of living a sort of double life and hiding part of yourself is prominent in werewolf media and also in depictions and the real lives of queer people. additionally, the transformation aspect is something many trans people find easy to connect to. the point is, it’s pretty damn easy to read lycanthropy as a metaphor for queerness of any kind.

and 80s werewolves have it even queerer. just like 80s vampires, they’re a monster that spreads their disease through physical contact. a bite. a scratch. and of course. usually a lot of blood. what else was big in terms of blood in the 80s? yeah. you probably guessed it. the aids crisis! i could write a whole different essay on this but the fears that came with the aids crisis are, just like most other societal fears, reflected in the horror films of their time. here’s a snippet from the AAWIL essay book that comes with the arrow dvd release.

so, even though the aids crisis wasn’t quite around when the film was released, it still had a connection to the culture, which adds to the potential for a queer reading. and it’s quite interesting that director john landis chooses specifically to compare david’s affliction to aids. also if you want proof on this point just check out how many werewolf and vampire movies came out during the 80s and the aids crisis. it really makes you think.

okay. now we’ve covered the basics. but what is it exactly about an american werewolf in london, and more specifically, jack goodman and david kessler, that reads as queer? well. let me tell you.

first of all a little more on the aids point. david’s condition is, like aids, infectious. and it affects almost exclusively men - david only has one female victim from his first night of “carnivorous lunar activities.” and you know what else disproportionately affects men? aids. and it’s also quite interesting that his victims are predominantly men with the idea of lycanthropy as a representation of his queerness - his preference for men in his nighttime activities can certainly be read as representative of something other than being a werewolf.

now, my favorite point and the one that i find most compelling. as we know, david and jack are on a little trip when jack is killed in front of david, and jack then returns to haunt david throughout the movie to encourage him to. yknow. kill himself. so what about that is queer? i’m so glad you asked! if you pay a little extra attention, you’ll notice that every time jack shows up, it’s after david’s just had a heterosexual experience. when he appears the first time, david’s just been flirting with his nurse, alex. when he comes back, it’s right after david and alex have just had sex. in fact, jack and david have a conversation here while david is fully naked. neither of them even bat an eye about this. and finally, jack and david have their last big talk while inside a very loud and very heterosexual pornography theater. kind of odd, right? it’s almost as if something other than jack’s ghost is haunting david. he can’t shake off visions of another man while he’s with his woman? here, jack could easily serve as a reminder of david’s sexuality, and he acts to rip david from his attempts at returning to normalcy after the attack. he just keeps coming back to tell david he’s a werewolf, and if we, as above, read lycanthropy as a metaphor for queerness, it easily reads as a blatant reminder for david that he is out of the societal norm (either in his existence as a werewolf or his queerness) and can’t go back now that he knows it. so, he’s reminded of this fact every time he tries to push himself to move on and be with alex. the final scene with the two of them in the porn theater is an even bigger nod to this idea. he’s literally in a pornography theater with a naked woman massive and on the big screen and all he can focus on is the fact that jack’s there, and of course, the fact that he is indeed a werewolf - permanently different from everyone around him, and, as far as he’s been told, dangerous and not deserving of life, which is a sentiment i’m sure many queer people can say they’re familiar with.

there are a few other nods to the idea of queerness in the film. of course, they’re not taken terribly seriously or presented as anything but jokes, given that it’s an 80s horror movie made by a straight man, but they do sort of add fuel to the fire of a queer reading of this movie. most notably, when david wakes up naked in the zoo after a night of werewolfing, he just kind of runs off with the nearest unattended clothing item. this piece of clothing happens to be a long women’s coat. bright red, with fur trim. wearing nothing but that, david almost looks like he’s wearing a dress, and it certainly doesn’t make him look more masculine. as he’s waiting in line for the train to return to alex’s, we’re shown all the men staring at him with disdain, as he whistles and makes small talk like nothing at all is off. david appears perfectly comfortable in the situation - it is just the judgement of others that makes him seem out of place. the coat emasculates him, and now the people around him are reading him as queer, whereas in his typical clothes, no one would look twice. later on, in an attempt to get himself arrested, david hurls obscenities in a public park, most notably (imo), “queen elizabeth is a man! prince charles is a faggot!” queerness is the butt of the joke here, of course. but if you squint real hard you can read david as queer and just decide he’s allowed to say the f slur. cause he can reclaim.

also, the film takes an interesting route - rather than “defeating” david’s otherness, by somehow returning him to a human state and saving his life, and thus allowing him live out his days with alex, they let the werewolfism win. david ends up tragically dead, despite alex’s please and love confession. in this film, heterosexuality Doesn’t win. now, i’m not necessarily saying queerness wins. it’s not like david gets to live happily ever after with jack. however, we as the audience are fully aware this is the only way things could have gone. david’s condition was permanent (as is queerness), and there was no way to change him. no way to make him fit that societal norm. instead he goes down, just like jack did. in a way, i guess they are presumably together in the end. i don’t really know the afterlife logistics in this universe, but they’re both dead and presumably at peace and not walking the earth, since david’s death broke the curse.

so! there’s a little rundown of most of the queercoding in an american werewolf in london. it’s a bit late so forgive me if anything doesn’t make sense. i’ll take follow up questions. peace and love.

[theshippirate22]

hi welcome to my essay

is this based solely in my insane brainrot? yeah probably. i’m doing it anyway

THE TIME TAYLOR SWIFT CONFIRMED ANDERPERRY LORE

This is Josh Charles

If you don’t know who he is, that’s cool. No one does. If you do know who he is, you’re probably gay, depressed, or both. Probably both.

And this is Josh Charles in 1989, in the critically acclaimed, cult classic film Dead Poets Society

Does he look familiar? Well, if you’re big on pop culture and/or a Swiftie, he should

Because THIS is Josh Charles in 2024

in Taylor Swift’s Fortnight music video

But who’s that standing next to him?

It’s Ethan Hawke

Who ALSO starred in Dead Poets Society (1989)

Kind of weird right? But whatever

UNTIL you remember that Fortnight is the first track off the latest Taylor Swift album

called The Tortured Poets Department

Now, the premise of the music video is that Taylor was in love with Post Malone’s character but only for a fortnight and losing him after loving him is what drove her into madness basically, so she’s been imprisoned in this asylum called The Tortured Poets Department where Josh Charles and Ethan Hawke are doctors that are experimenting on her to help her get over her love for Post Malone. Note that Post Malone is also there and is another one of the doctors.

Canonically in Dead Poets Soceity Josh Charles’ character Knox Overstreet is in sort of this awkward situationship with a girl named Chris Noel, who’s “practically engaged” to this idiot called Chet and it's assumed that after everything goes down at the end of the film, Knox stops pursuing her and Chris marries Chet to live out her horrific 1950's housewife prophecy.

Similarly, Ethan Hawke’s character, Todd Anderson, is in this tragic queer-coded homoerotic friendship with main protagonist Neil Perry (played by the lovely Robert Sean “Bobby” Leonard) that never manages to come to fruition because of Neil’s untimely death via suicide.

So back to Taylor. Obviously she's a patient in The Tortured Poets Department being treated for her hopeless love for Post Malone. She says she even took the "magical move-on drug" but "the effects were temporary," which implies that what Josh and Ethan are testing on her is this drug, this cure-all for lost romance, and they haven't quite figured it out.

Which makes perfect sense, when you think about what happened to Knox and Todd. They had these short-lived perfect loves with Chris and Neil respectively that ended before anything could ever happen. Love cut too short, just like Taylor and Post Malone. Which is wild when you realize that means TS basically just confirmed anderperry.

Not only this, but in the movie, the boys are encouraged to write and enjoy poetry thoroughly, and while all the boys take it to heart, Knox and Todd are the ones that are frequently seen actually writing poetry. Knox uses it to try and win Chris over, as well as working through his feelings for her, while Todd uses it as a guilty pleasure sort of thing that he's seemingly embarrassed by (which I could talk about for 25 pages but I'll spare you.)

So basically, just like Taylor, Knox and Todd are also tortured poets. Which means not only are they the doctors trying to come up for a cure for their own maladies, they're also patients in the Tortured Poets Department

THEY'RE JUST AS CRAZY AS TAYLOR.

If that seems too big a stretch, remember that Post Malone is there. From his bridge we see that he's going through the same thing as Taylor except on the opposite side, and he's also seen in the poetry room with Taylor, confirming that he himself is a poet as well, and in the lab he's also a doctor. So Josh and Ethan are patients just as much as Post Malone is, who's just as much as Taylor.

All four of them are locked in together, trying to get over these lost loves they are mourning.

By deliberately choosing not just Ethan Hawke to cameo, but also Josh Charles, and not say Dylan Kussman or Gale Hansen, or even MAIN STAR Bobby Leonard, it draws a direct parallel between Knox and Todd's characters, and therefore between Chris and Neil, and therefore, Taylor Swift has basically confirmed the ongoing implication that anderperry was the metaphor all along.

[z0mbiekisses]

Another request QUEEN!! I loved loved loved the Josh fic it was amazing and has me coming back for more! First of all though, how are you? I realised we haven't talked much before lol. Anyways, my amazing spectacular request!!

RAB Tyler who is best friends/hiding his feelings with the reader. She's someone who works super hard, gets good grades and almost drives herself insane with all the extra curriculars she does yet still doesn't feel good enough. After having a stressful day she stops by his house feeling worthless and he comforts her, refusing to let her believe she's not amazing.

Thanks bestie!

AHHH THANK YOU BFF!!!🤗🤗 thank you so much for requesting more, you’re always welcomed i LOVE your ideas . i did kind of write this in a highschool setting 😣😣.

i’m okayy, very tiredd BUT we’ll push on through (hehe)💪 TYSM FOR ASKING, how are you??😁 it’s always nice to hear from you 🫶

thank you guys so much for ur recent support!! it means smmm, sorry this took so long and it’s short, i have some more things in the drafts that hopefully make up for it 🫶 requests are opened !!🩶

THIS IS ME TRYING !

i always did my best. in school, life, everything. i needed to get into college, i NEEDED to get out of my house. however, college isn’t cheap. and i don’t exactly have the best support system, so it’s up to me. i’m in film club, national honors society and student council. i spend whatever free time studying or at my best friend, tyler’s house. it’s overwhelming, but i didn’t have many options. if i wanted to get into a good school and start living my life the way I want to, this had to be done. but today was rough, i spent all of last night finishing my college essay just to go to school bright and early the next day. i was so exhausted, but what else was new. except i had a test in my first two classes, a presentation for national honors society. and i had to stay late for a student council meeting.

i was used to the stress, however today was just awful. every little thing that could go wrong went wrong. i was late to school because my car broke down, which meant i missed taking the test. i tried to beg my teacher to still let me take it but he only said he'll think about letting me make it up. i NEEDED to take this test, it was a huge part of my grade. it wasn't fair. i gave my presentation for NHS, which went fine. except everyone's presentations were WAY better than mine was. it was obvious the amount of effort and time they spent on it, sure i put effort into mines. i was just missing the time, since i stayed up all night wednesday putting it together. i felt like an idiot. i sat alone at lunch, i only shared my lunch period with one of my friends. but she was busy hanging with her boyfriend. i ended up skipping and just spending the time volunteering at the library. the more hours the better. the day seemed to drag on, especially since i had to stay later. like most if not all the other kids who did student council, we were only doing it for our college applications. i didn't get along well with the other kids. not in the way where we would fight or anything. they were all just so pretentious and snobby. they would always undermind me, as if i could never be an intellectual individual like them. i spent the whole 4 hours i had to stay there wanting to stick my face in a hot pan of oil. when it was all FINALLY over, i sat in my car for a minute. i felt so.. worthless. everything i did didn't feel like enough, maybe it wasn't enough. what's the point of doing all these things if i wasn't even good at any of it? it wasn't long before tears filled my eyes. but i watched as the other kids from student council walked over to their fancy cars. and i realized the last thing i needed was for them to see me crying in car that probably should've been in a junkyard AGES ago. i didn't want to go home, my parents would only make me feel worse. i called tyler and asked if i could come over. he said yes and with that i drove over to his house in silence. my thoughts racing through my head were the only things i could hear. i will never be good enough. for anyone, for anything. what is the point in even trying?

eventually i knocked on tyler's door. to which he answered with a smile. it was a struggle for me to return one back. i didn't say anything at first, tyler was telling me about some story about him and josh. i couldn't focus though, my head was spinning. tyler noticed, he reached out and touched my shoulder lightly. "what's going on y/n?", tyler spoke softly. i tried to shrug it off, but tyler was more stubborn than i was.

"i know you're not okay, what's up?", tyler looked over at me softly. i wanted to tell him not to worry about it. my problems were stupid anyways. but i knew tyler wasn't one to let these kind of things go.

"what is the point of trying if i'll never be good enough.."

"trying to do what?"

"everything.", i let out a sigh.

"all i do is try, try, try. and yet i always fall short every single time i mean- it's exhausting.", as much as i tried to fight it tears fell from my eyes.

"i'm not good enough i-"

"y/n please.", tyler reached out and held my hand.

"you are more than amazing. you are the most hard working, driven person i know."

"you have to say that-"

"i mean it.", my cloudy eyes met tyler's brown ones.

"i think you're more than enough, you have such amazing things ahead of you. and that's all because of your dedication. i'm so proud of you.", i practically fell into tyler's arms. he rubbed my back as he spoke over my muffled sobs.

"you're so perfect to me y/n, i admire you.", those word silenced the negative thoughts pounding in my head. tyler's arms made me feel safe. i finally felt okay. i always knew tyler had a way with words thanks to his music. but this was so much better than that. i finally felt like i was enough.

“look at me y/n.”, i hesitated for a moment before i lifted my head up. this was the closest we’ve ever been, our inches only inches away from each other.

“i think you’re so lovely.”, my cheeks flushed a little bit. tyler’s compliment making my heart skip a beat.

“as long as you think so.”

[20001541]

What do you think being in prison was actually like for All For One? We know he lies A LOT, so I don't think he's nearly as unaffected as he's shown or rather not shown I guess 😓

Thinking deeper on afo's imprisonment it's actually a lot more disturbing the more I think about it.

What afo is going through is basically solitary confinement 24/7. Guns constantly pointed at him ready to headshot him the second he tries tapping into his quirk or squirms too much. Unable to move at all from the neck down due to restraints. So many sensors it leaves him either completely vulnerable or overstimulated at worst. We never see him lying down either. He's always sitting which is painfull and extremely detrimental to a person's health and mobility if done for long hours without standing up.

I know he's an S rank criminal and super dangerous because the only person who could defeat him (All Might) retired, but you're telling me this futuristic society couldn't do anything more humane with all that tech other than shoving him into a death trap? (I wanted to call it a Saw death trap, but I never watched any of the Saw films ummm)

There's also the more creepy implication to questions like how does afo go to the bathroom in Tartarus. There's no way they just let him walk up to a toilet/urinal 😨

All For One is no stranger to dehumanization and he takes almost everything in stride even Tartarus from the looks of it, but that one panel where he almost begs All Might to not go always stuck out to me.

Sorry for the long essay. I just wanted to say something about this and chat with a fellow All For One fan.

you don't need to apologize, it's an interesting topic!

I think afo's time in prison affected him more deeply than he would ever admit. look how they had him ->

strapped to a metal slab, not being able to move his limbs at all, alone for hours constantly being watched and he doesn't have access to his quirks that allow him to navigate the world so he's completely blind here. oh let's not forget that if he thinks about activating a quirk or makes a sudden movement the guns pointed at his head will automatically shoot him. also like you said being in a sitting position for a long period of time will end up being detrimental to your health.

tartarus whole existence is a violation of human rights and that's without mentioning the disgusting way the guards treat the prisoners. yes they did evil things, but I think dehumanization of any group of people is a dangerous road to walk on and can lead to horrific things committed against said group because it's easier to justify doing horrid things to others if you think the other party isn't even human. with all the amazing quirks and technology that is available it's a surprise to see that they haven't come up with a better way to deal with imprisoned villains. maybe it's because they don't care to come up with a better solution because once again they don't see them as humans so why should they bother trying to make their living situation more bearable? awful stuff.

too bad we don't see anyone from our main cast really question this type of treatment, but oh well. I guess it's implied some things did change as we see spinner was allowed to write and publish a book while in prison (doubt they let him free to do it). so he's not strapped to a metal chair all day like the other prisoners we saw. unless he's getting some special treatment, I don't know the story doesn't really tell us about what happened with him after his confrontation with izuku. only shows us that he managed to publish his book.

BUT back to the main question, what was being in prison in like for afo? honestly, I think he had to fight to stay sane while down there. being in those conditions for a long period of time will wear down your sanity. you saw how desperate he was for all might to stay and talk with him despite him being someone he hates. probably the thought of getting yoichi back kept him going, after all when he's down there he gets excited when he's able to hear his voice for the first time in over a century. even the guards freaked out because his the monitor tracking his vitals went crazy when he heard it.

still I think the whole experience disturbs him more than he would ever admit and it was traumatic but he just shoves down in order to focus on the goal ahead of him. no time to process any of that he's got a brother to catch

[piglet26]

Top Five Reylo Scenes

Before I start I do want to add why Reylo means so much to me. Recently I went through a really deep depression and part of what pulled me out of it was Reylo. I was able to write essays and do analysis about this OTP. Rewatching the films and focusing on theirs scenes helped get my mind off of some pretty deep stuff. I was also able to receive love and connection through the Reylo community. It's meant a lot to me! Also, I know that Tumblr is very supportive to anyone going through a tough time and directing people to self help lines. If you are going through a time that is really dark or challenging I Love You in Reylo.

Now my top three scenes is tough cause I love them all, but if I had to focus on an order to the game I'd say........

5 " You Need a Teacher"

“There’s a history in Star Wars of the attraction between the light and dark…”

Truth be told I'm surprised this scenes ranked as high as it did with me because I do not like that she beat him. The more I thought about it I realized why I did want to rank it. There is something raw and dirty about them here. The look of sheer amazement he gives her after that lightsaber flew to her was everything. The force theme beginning to play. Then when she lit the lightsaber and he was like "oh, you wanna duel? ok, let's duel then." The moment they found the force together with their faces beautifully lit up. It really is great.

There is nothing violent really about their fight, like I don't fear for their lives. Resembling the scene where Kylo Ren said could “take whatever he wants” and “Don’t be afraid, I feel it too” while looking at her lips. The chemistry took me by complete surprise and I shifted in my seat uncertainly watching this the first time. Surely I shouldn’t like a murderer and a villain with Rey, but I couldn’t help it. This very chemistry, though probably amounting to less than ten minutes of actual interaction between each other, leaves the audience with a hungry desire for more.

Reylo and Anidala could be mirrors of each other with Anakin falling to the Dark Side because of his selfish love for Padme and Kylo coming back to the Light because of his selfless love for Rey.

When Kylo is with Rey, he is calmer, and calculating. For Kylo, the seduction is to the Light. However, when Rey first searches out the Force with her feelings, she immediately ends up in the Dark Side, and is unafraid to take what she wants from it. In battle, she is furious, screaming and bent on destruction. As I mentioned above, Anidala and Reylo could be the Force’s attempts at balancing itself. Where Anidala was destined to fail, Reylo is destined to prevail and finally balance the Force.

4 "You'll turn........I'll help you"

“The Abduction,” the song in TFA when the “bridal carry” happens, has a very similar ascending line of notes to a recurring theme in Tchaikovsky’s Romeo and Juliet overture.

I love everything about this. The infamous elevator scene. Reylo once again dominates the screen in The Last Jedi, easily rendering Finn’s growing romance with Rose bland and tedious in comparison. Rian Johnson is a Reylo stan so I stan him. This is the first time Rey and Kylo are physically side by side since she tried to kill him in the forest on Star killer Base. It's the most sexually charged body language! They spiffed up for one another. She’s changed her clothes, put on makeup and decided to leave her hair down. His hair is freshly washed with a spritz.

“Ben” She’s using his real name now and like in every scene with her now he's calm. He hates his name, but when she says it he hears her. She's appealing to his true nature, or, what she believes it to be. It's possessive as well. He is HER Ben. The way he tried not to have a reaction to her until she said his name. He's trying to stay blank and not give away what he intends to do, but none the less has a reaction to her.

Rian Johnson basically confirmed that Kylo / Ben wanted to kiss Rey in the elevator scene. It’s canon so I am prepared to fight. Not to mention, Johnson tells us that Adam Driver, as Kylo / Ben, seriously considered kissing Rey in this scene. He is, indeed, staring at her lips in the elevator with the most intense eye contact.

Reylo speaks to me, and many others, on a spiritual level. Like many stories of both maiden and monster, Reylo shows us what it means to be a heroine. A heroine reaches her hand out to monsters and says: you deserve love and compassion, no matter the mistakes you’ve made. We're in a movement where women are tired of "fixing" men and I'm here for it. I honestly think that's why so many woman found it difficult that Reylo is not soft and sweet.

3 ........Ben?"

Adam Driver says Kylo Ren can’t help but harbor admiration for Daisy Ridley’s Rey in the Last Jedi. “I think there’s something familiar there, as well as something to be feared, or something… that he (Kylo) can’t quite place.”

Let me go ahead and say that I'm going to cheat.... I'm including the novelization in this because that mixed with novel is what gives me life. TROS brought such mixed Reylo emotions. We got great stuff! In small doses *eye roll* In the novel. She was glad to see him. Glad to be with him in this moment. It was the greatest gift she could have given him. His heart was full as Rey reached for his face, let her fingers linger against his cheek. And then, wonder of wonders, she leaned forward and kissed him.

The way Rey sits in wonder...... never mind she was borderline dead..... Ben is there, really there and she's just staring in wonder. Ben is looking at her in painful awe and relief. They are both almost child-like in their affection. The way Rey hesitates, after years alone, it takes her a moment to work up the courage for her first kiss. Ben just lets her take her time. The way he waits patiently for her to work up the courage and then the moment the kiss, he pulls her to him like she is the air he breathes for his first kiss. Oh! The smiles. Seriously?! Ben and Rey are happy! There was fireworks, champagne and pussy power! Rey’s hand. Ben gave his very life essence to Rey because his love is that absolute.

And let’s not forget the novelization of TLJ had this quote “They will never have to be alone again”.

Now this is where things get messy as hell. Adam was on the set of Tatooine..... but as they cut that ending. Daisy stated regarding the ending “the crew was shaken in a way I had not seen before. and I thought, ‘my god if this is people’s immediate reaction when the scene isn’t even ready, imagine what it will be like to see it in the movies, with the John Williams soundtrack and all that." When Ben faded into the force...... no one felt anything for a moment then there was just confusion and disappointment. You cannot nor will you ever have me believing that this janky ending was the real deal.

2 "Join Me.......... Please"

“He (Kylo) sensed his and Rey’s destinies were intertwined, but how?......"

The Throne Room Proposal! Kylo premeditated in the purest Sith way regarding the murdering of his Master for his bae. Then he gives Rey a furious speech on killing the past in a bid to win her over and fulfill his dark Queen fantasy. “You come from nothing, you’re nothing—but not to me,” Kylo tells Rey, in one of the most beautifully twisted declarations of love ever uttered in a family blockbuster, before quietly pleading with her to join him like he’s the most desperately lonely person in the universe. The duo’s visions of their future together—Rey sees Kylo turning to the Light, and Kylo witnesses Rey joining him in the Dark. However, upon Snoke’s death, the bond still stands. Kylo offers Rey a place at his side and his hand in marriage, but it is the proposal of an awkward boy, grasping desperately at a relationship he has only begun to understand.

And you can see it in her face, that she’s torn, there is a part of her that wants to take his hand, not to rule the galaxy, that’s not her ambition, but to simply stay with someone who truly understands her as well. But it’s the ‘please’ Adam Driver showed that Julliard education with that one word. Both actors just brough it. You can see how far they've come and yet still so far away from each other.

1 "You're Not Alone.......Neither are You"

“When Rey feels rejected by Luke Skywalker, who also sees parallels between the power in her and the abilities of his estranged nephew, the old Jedi master inadvertently pushes the two towards each other.”

You knew it was coming. In TLJ, Kylo is at his most sympathetic and tempting; Rey at her most understanding. Both are outcasts because of their power, they are both lonely, whispering to each other comfortingly “you’re not alone” and “neither are you.” Kylo sees more in Rey than she does within herself. He also challenges her as an equal. Ben ultimately encourages her to not only expand her mind, but in embrace her womanhood. It is no wonder that Rey goes to him. After experiencing Luke and his failings as a master and failing to find the answer's she's been looking for....... Rey ends up relating to Kylo. Kylo, for once, has put the whole of misery and life lessons into something productive.

When we find them alone in a dark hut, slowly lean towards each other, and very hesitantly touch hands in a scene fraught with romantic tension. Notably, the Force music plays during the scene, signaling their relationship’s importance. A tear crawls down Rey’s face as the two connect and understand each other on a level so deep that it is reminiscent of sex, and causes Luke Skywalker to pull the ultimate Dad move and blow up the hut.

As Rey and Kylo develop their bond we see the force attempting to balance itself. Yin and Yang....... the imagery littered throughout the sequel trilogy is drawn heavily from those belief systems. We see continuous parallel shots with Rey and Ben to represent this duality. Both are presented in contrasting surroundings that represent the duality of the masculine and the feminine. In many shots half of their figure is bathed in light and the other half is bathed in the darkness.

This connection is as spiritual as it is romantic. As Jason Fry explained, romance is merely the analog we have in the living force for this deep spiritual bond.

[fullmetalbunny16]

Ok so I'm going to like rant for a minute here about my latest hyper fixation that's been going on for about a year AKA one of the best obscure 80s horror films of all the time

REANIMATOR 1985 directed by Stewart Gordon

AKA one the most goated if not THE most goated obscure 80`s horror film ever

-I'm not very good at writing essays so this is just a brief analysis of the dynamic between Dan and Herbert and how I think Herbert screwed Dan over narrative wise (it's not as simple as I'm putting it)

(Unrelated but also I wanted to mention how unnecessary SA scenes happen to be a common trope in the movies unfortunately)

Starting with this fucker right here

(that is PEAK pathetic meow meow he's so awesome I hate him I wanna put him in a microwave💖)

-one thing I wanted to note is how Herbert doomed Dan from the get-go, so if you let me explain basically Meg was doomed by the plot because due to her being a female side character in an 80s horror film and being seen as a nuisance by West soon that image being projected on to Dan but not as direct and only seeing it as a difficult situation to where she is being quote unquote "unreasonable" when it comes to the work up until inevitably it's too late for Dan to take it back cuz his fiance is killed Wests very creations,the very thing that he assisted in resurrecting being the very indirect cause of his fiance's death.

-now moving forward we can see a turn of events where the very moment that leads to Daniel Cain's downfall is when he allows Herbert to move in. Megan's off put by him and tries to voice her concerns to Dan but Dan just brushes it off believing that West is just a little strange but nothing to be concerned about, then Meg discovers rufuses dead carcass in wests room.

-any normal person would immediately kick Herbert out and notify the police but of course Dan shockingly gives him the benefit of the doubt AGAIN after Herbert tells him he didn't kill his cat and he found him like that.

(of course Herbert probably didn't kill Rufus but it's still creepy and weird to keep your roommates dead cat in your fridge)

-my point being Daniel is doomed narrative wise, the very moment of his downfall could have been was the day he met West but also whenever he allowed him to live as a roommate with him and his fiance.

-his true Fall from Grace is when West manages to convince him that he can reanimate dead parts and "needs" his assistance (maybe he did but let's not ignore the fact Herbert is openly manipulative to try to keep Dan from leaving the work and it works every single time because Dan is shockingly easy to manipulate)

(also but to be fair if I was in Dan's place I would be easily manipulated too because Herbert's freaking adorable while also being a conniving bastard)

-one funny thing I wanted to note is how Jeffrey Combs accidentally implied Herbert doesn't know what sex is just thought that was funny

-another thing is it's not just Herbert's work that also caused the death of Meg but also caused the death of Meg's father and indirect loss of dans scholarship leaving Dan no choice but to turn to West and assist him, and yes maybe Daniel could leave any moment he wanted to but due to the damage that's already been done he probably felt like he couldn't go back so he felt like he just had to double down on the work.

-also how Herbert convinced Dan saying how they could cure brain death which basically is unheard of and how Dan himself saw how Herbert's serum worked in front of his very eyes and how Dan also happens to be a very caring person who just wants to help people this gave Herbert a pretty solid opportunity, and boy did he take it!

-also quoting what Bruce said on the actors commentary Herbert's work to him is basically what sex is to anyone else, it's borderline erotic especially that one scene in Bride where Dan decides to take control when they're reanimating the bride and Herbert's look of absolute flabbergastation is hilarious.

-also I'm not justifying Dan staying with Herbert knowing openly what they're doing is kind of inhumane but "it's in the name of science of course!!"

-so basically yeah Dad is kind of doomed by The narrative basically since you know Herbert is the main character of reanimator, I mean Lovecraft literally wrote small separate stories dedicated to West so of course he's the main character I'm just saying that due to Herbert's influence it caused Dan to essentially lose everything.

And basically if Dan just slammed the door and Herbert's face none of this would have happened the end!!

(also I'm dog water at making essays and this wasn't even an essay it was just a small analysis of how I thought Herbert doomed Dan from the get-go and how I thought like the chain of events that happened when Herbert entered his life caused us downfall for him and I also have a deep head cannon that in the events of beyond reanimator Dad's life spiraled even further because West wasn't there he had no one to assist he had no one, Herbert was the last person he had left before he turned him in and sent him to prison and I doubt Francesca stayed with him after the incident with the bride so yeah that's basically what I think)

This is how I headcanon how Dan is during the events of beyond because I refuse to believe that man is living in peace

[sout999]

adhd talk

the third truly unsung project alongside my film and dissertation was the weird amount of targeted effort i had to put into Completing Anything Big As A Neurodivergent Person Whose Brain Is A Crazy Off The Rails Train Staffed and Patronised Entirely By Multiple Exact Copies Of The Squirrel From Ice Age

which is a description like 99/100 people reading this can relate to, but i think a sentiment i see less often and therefore feel kind of stupid and stubborn and lonesome about is "adhd is innate but is also exasperated by hectic lifestyle/modern instant gratification machines so if i fix my habits around those i can cure myself forever". which is silly and wrong but also i feel abit disconnected from adhd social media culture and cant cope just relating to it (which is all it seems to be sometimes) but learning to harness or tame it to do the things that are really important to me

i felt really cringe tbh having to look up youtube videos of HARVARD STUDENT REVEALS PRO STUDY TRICK and then narrowing it down to specifically adhd-focused study videos and keeping a planner and setting aside specific time to study studying and practising anti-academic meltdown journaling techniques and reading fucking atomic habits but i really didn't want to contribute to my abhorrent academic record following me all through undergrad. in fact i wish i had done this sooner but i was not self aware enough to consider the fact

probably the best change i made was severely cutting down or being mindful of social media time, i don't backread my tl anymore and have more moments of awareness when i find myself dumbly scrolling and realize i dont want to be doing this, and then wondering what i actually Do want to be doing. i keep a book nearby to read, and have also swapped a lot of social media time to sketching-off-pinterest time. reading about the psychology behind social media apps is also super interesting, although i always feel like a paranoid wacko conspiracy theorist talking about it. stuff like how negativity and judgemental behaviour is good for engagement (and therefore ad revenue), and how if all posts on your tl were interesting you wouldn't be as addicted to social media as you are, therefore microblogging employs a slot machine/gacha system where you "roll" for posts by logging on and hope to get a good one. it's a little full on but the more i think of it as a revolting and evil machine the more incentive i have to do something else with my time ^q^

a harder thing to do was, in the late stages of the project, the real crunch time month, avoid everything that could become a huge hyperfixation, and then eventually even minor distractions or fixations. because i know if i got super obsessed with something i'd just be up posting about it or drawing fanart. i had to bar myself from persona 3 remake and elden ring dlc and all these other shiny new releases, and the mobile games i was playing... i look forward to catching up on them now. i took up reading books a lot more because unfortunately thats just not as exciting. in the last month of film work i stopped listening to music on my computer so i wouldnt get drawing or animation ideas to distract me from film work. as of writing this i havent listened to music in like 40 days guys 😱 at the same time i am the kind of person who needs background noise to work, so i have:

watched novum's four hour hereditary video essay three times

watched novum's seven hour midsomar video essay three times

watched that one five hour bojack horseman retrospective twice

listened to audiobooks of the Britney Spears biography, Jennette McCurdy biography, three Playboy Bunny biographies (i was on some sort of lady bopgraphy kick i guess), and a few fiction books

rewatched all of bojack horseman

started on House MD and got a few seasons in before i finished the project, amazingly the perfect show to look away from bc of all the medical stuff, how many lumbar punctures do you need to show like seriously

honorable mention to the learned skill of communication and being honest and picking your battles and killing your darlings which is a larger part of managing mental illness than i cared to admit but one of the hardest ones because it involved confronting things and making big painful drastic changes and then having to tell the faculty about them. sometimes i'd be stuck on a piece of animation work for weeks/months, then go back and change the underlying idea to one i'm actually passionate about, and do the animation work in one day using newly found magical hyperfocus passion power. it's crazy! but being able to be confident about taking those steps rather than keeping on with what you're "supposed" to do went a long way.

i very much look forward to listening to a music and playing some video games properly now and being pulverized like a small victorian child from the sheer amount of fun i'm having. i'd say it was all worth it and a fun experiment in channeling the magical humours of passion and boredom and i hope it will help me with future projects too. i Am super burnt out though x__ x thanks for reading and for all your support up until now!

[brooke121000]

.• the tortured poets department •.

Spencer Reid x bau!user

part 2 - part 1

fluff, idiots in love, early seasons Spence, awkward romance, eventual smut double

posted on Wattpad and ao3!! Highly recommend checking it out on Wattpad as updates might come faster.

The first case was.. okay. I mean, it went alright. I suppose I was expecting more. Some extreme. A big failure, or a huge win. It just.. went okay. We solved the case alright. It was a simple serial killer case, all female victims. It ended up being the phone guy. 

The next two days of work were.. a learning curve. Hotch gave me insight on how to read a suspects cues in an interrogation, and me and Spencer had several conversations about old film, Greek philosophers, and food, of all things. I wasn't about to say that there was a spark between us, but there was something.

A kinship. An understanding.

When we arrived back at the office late at night, we were all mildly tired. The lights were all off, except for a few desk lamps illuminating the wooden surfaces. Several sighs and groans of relief came from the team as we pooled through the doors. My eyes flickered to the clock, which, to my surprise, still read, in bold red letters- 

6:54

I furrowed my brows, turning back to the team. "Geez, it's so early. Feels like midnight already."

We all migrated to the desk area, sitting in our respective chairs, and I let a little giggle slip when Morgan spun in his at a speed I frankly- did not think was possible. I ran my hands over my face as Elle and Morgan discussed what to do with the hours remaining in the day. "We could go out.." he smirked. 

We all contemplated it, and I plopped down on a chair, tucking my knees close to me. I could feel my heartbeat in my knees. I brushed my hair back, and then wiped under my eyes just in case my mascara was running.

Suddenly, my brain pinged. Shoot. I can't. The essay. I sighed. 

"I wish I could.. I have an essay to write, apparently."

"Hm? I thought you weren't in college?" Elle said, her brows raised with a little smile. The question felt vaguely malicious, but I answered anyway. "I'm not. I have a friend- who's still in college though. She needs an essay on the psychology of armed robberies. Some project, I dunno."

Spencer's brows knitted together. "She wants an.. essay? That's not a casual request.. at all, actually."

I shrugged, acknowledging the glaringly obvious, very true statement. "Well, she's a really good friend of mine.

Morgan's lips parted in surprise. "Wow. Well, go write your essay then, I guess. Nice of you."

I groaned, then threw my head back in frustration. "This.. sucks."

"I could help you."

I turned in confusion, meeting Spencer's voice. "Really? It's.. you don't have to." He shook his head, grabbing his bag close to him as he sat back on the desk. 

"No, it's.. it's no problem. I know a lot on the topic."

I nodded.

"..hey, have you ever used a typewriter?" 

Spencer said with a small smile. 

"I.. haven't. Are you plotting something?"

He let out a small chuckle. "No, no I'm not plotting anything. It's just, if you're going to write an essay, I have a beautiful antique typewriter you'd.. probably enjoy."

I grinned. I wasn't expecting the offer, but gladly accepted it. I tried to ignore how I felt my heart beating faster at the idea of being alone with him. Something told me Spencer wasn't the kind of guy to offer to hang out and write together on a moments notice, but I agreed well enough. 

Me and Spencer awkwardly exchanged numbers, and then turned back to the teams conversation. in the night, our small conversations died down, and my eyelids felt heavier. Spencer had already gone home, and I figured I should probably go home if I wanted to clean my apartment in time. so I said my goodbyes.

As I left the building, my heels clicking on the sidewalk while I looked for my car through the pitch black street, I contemplated why Spencer had made his suggestion. Maybe it was because we had formed some sort of kinship on the case. Maybe he's simply offering to help out a coworker, and I'm totally crazy. I'm not really sure these days.

Later, I figured I should probably call Spencer and make sure he was still coming over. I eyed the phone on my nightstand before I eventually found the courage in myself to pick it up and punch in his number.

I held the phone up to my ear, and waited as the shrill ringing echoed. For a second, I found myself hoping he wouldn't answer.

And then he did.

"Hello.. (y/n)?"

His voice was soft and smooth, like honey pouring straight through my phone speaker. I straightened my posture and cleared my throat. 

"Um, yeah- hi, Spencer. I'm just checking up, are we still on for tonight?"

There was a second of silence, and then some shuffling. "Oh- yeah, yeah. We are. I'll be there in.. thirty minutes? If that's alright?"

Thirty minutes? 

Fuck, that's soon. 

"Yeah, sure. Thanks. See you then." I smiled a little, before hanging up.

I'm only slightly ashamed to admit that I spent the next thirty minutes doing my makeup and changing into something cuter. I couldn't help that I wanted to impress him. 

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Trudging up the beaten down steps of the moon-lit apartment complex, heavy cardboard box balanced awkwardly in my arms, the reason why I had offered to even do this was still not apparent to me. I didn't do things like this.

I could be in my apartment right now, safe and sound, making dinner. But I wasn't. Perhaps it was something about the way (y/n)'s eyes had saddened when she realized she would have to miss out, or maybe it was that she was a beautiful woman and I was an idiot. She was- strikingly beautiful, after all. Maybe I am, really, a simple person.

I had no intention of overwhelming her, and I didn't see this as a date. I hoped she didn't. Maybe this was going to be a one time thing. Hopefully this was going to be a one time thing. I don't think I could handle all the childlike, immature teasing me and (y/n) would have to endure if we were to actually see each other outside of work regularly. God, I have to stop assuming things of this. I'm helping her write an essay, that's all.

That's all. 

My hands were almost shakey when I knocked, and the door opened promptly, my face hit with her perfume.

(y/n) smiled, a real, warm smile. She brushed a strand behind her ear, shuffling to the side to allow me in. "Hi, Spencer! I'm glad you could make it. I could.. really use the help."

I nodded, striding into the apartment as I looked around "oh, don't worry, it's.. really no problem." I smiled softly.

The apartment was cozy, and well decorated. Several lamps and candles let off an incandescent auburn light, and the general area smelt of cinnamon and old furniture. It was unusually nice. It matched her.

"I've already started the essay." She said cheerfully. I placed the heavy typewriter box down on the island, and looked over at (y/n), who had already fluttered across the space. She was in the kitchen, flicking on a black kettle with a soft click. 

"Tea?"

I nodded. I still felt awkward in the apartment, like I was looming into her space, casting some sort of uncomfortable shadow. We had only met a few days ago, and here I was in her home. Maybe she's just too nice for her own good, too quick to allow people into her life. I frowned at the thought. 

I had already gotten the black and red typewriter set up, flicking small metal switches and adjusting things. She smiled, her eyes widening. "Ooh, my gosh, that is pretty."

Soon enough, she came around the island with two tea mugs. She held them up. "Mushroom or ghost?" 

I chuckled a little, and happily accepted the cartoony ghost mug. "This'll do."

She immediately walked to the island, balancing the mug as she plopped down in a chair, crossing her legs under her. I noticed her mismatched, colorful socks and cracked a smile before I sat down on the next chair, making sure to keep a healthy distance. She reached across the marble to grab her laptop, and I put a hand under the mug to stabilize it, our knuckles brushing together. I tried to ignore the heat in my cheeks as she finally got a hold on the laptop and pulled it back into my lap, opening it. She flicked through her tabs.

She landed on a series of emails, between what seemed to be her and a close friend, gossiping. It was in moments like these I wished my reading speed wasn't what it was. I quickly absorbed each text.

"Omgg, no!!"

"Bitch, you have to! How tall is he??"

"Tallllll.. capital T 🫣"

"You can totally pull him!! Do it."

"You're crazy."

(y/n) gasped a little. "Oh! Sorry." She giggled. Quickly closing all her tabs and landing on the google docs page. "Alright, so I figure we'll just copy what I've already written onto the typewriter and then start from there."

"That sounds right. I have to warn you though, it is a little bit of a learning curve- using a typewriter I mean."

She raised her brows. "Oh, yeah, I've heard. I've never written one one before."

"I'll teach you." I smiled earnestly.

"Alright, so- first you have to feed the paper in." I said, pulling a stack from the box. She grabbed one, clearly already eager to do it herself. She fed the paper through, brows furrowed in concentration.

"Perfect. Now you just- pull this lever." I said, flicking the small metal switch. "Then I'll set the margins..." I trailed off, setting them and then pulling the bar down.

She nodded, watching me intently. "Now?"

"Now, just turn this knob to roll the paper into place." I said gently, pointing to a small white knob on the side. She reached forward and twisted it, pulling the paper just a little too far down. I laughed a little.

"Don't get ahead of yourself. Here." I put my hand on hers, guiding her to twist it back and put the paper in the right place. 

Then, we just.. wrote. Admittedly, it was very nice to see somebody be equal to me in an academic area such as writing. And she was, incredibly talented. She was very focused, her brows furrowed slightly as she typed with a speed id never seen before, except of course in myself. I admired the creativity in her words, the way she was able to wrap emotions into what she typed. I gave recommendations here and there, but other than that I mostly observed. She looked in her element.

She was so distracted with the writing that her tea sat neglected the whole night, her nails tapping on the keys, the cacophony of soft clicking filling the warm apartment. When she finally finished writing, when the last key was clicked, the last letter typed, she let out a sigh of relief, and I pulled the page out.

"You're a very good writer."

She smiled bashfully. "I'm sure you're better." I frowned a little at her self deprecation.

"I assure you, I'm not. I tend to sound.. clinical in my writing. You don't. Really, it's.. you're very talented."

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The night went.. very well. Spencer is charming. Even when he doesn't want to be. 

When I finished writing, and offered Spencer wine, he gladly accepted. I didn't take him for a drinker, but he has good taste so I figured he could enjoy a nice red. We plopped onto the couch, my legs crossed among the fall colored pillows as I sipped from a delicate glass.

When Spencer finally left, it was nearing 11:00. I immediately collapsed in my bed, pulling the duvet up over my shoulders. 

I had an unfortunate realization when I trudged into the living room the following morning.

He left his typewriter.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[davidtennantgenderenvy]

As i approach the end of finals week, I’m taking a moment to reflect on all of the absolutely CRAZY things that have happened during my roller coaster of a sophomore year of college!

This is of course, going to go down in the history books as The David Tennant year. What started as a silly little reawakened special interest in my favorite actor has somehow opened doors for me that I never could have imagined. Writing a two hour video essay about this man is NOT how I thought I’d be spending last semester, but not only did it become one of the proudest creative projects of my entire life and connected me with so many amazing internet buddies, but it was also invaluable in helping me come to terms with my queerness and come out to my friends and family. Thanks to a silly little short about David’s BAFTA outfit, he KNOWS I EXIST NOW, which is still so wild. And finally, he inspired me to write my most ambitious piece of music to date, my 8 month labor of love Crowley’s Lament, which put to the test basically everything I’ve learned about music and performing and has been received so beautifully by you guys.

This year wasn’t all about him, though! I finally got to make my collegiate stage debut in my first opera, and Iolanthe ended up being the dream role I never knew I needed- an endearing and inspiring character that was such a fulfilling challenge for an actor and singer to play. I learned loads of challenging classical, musical theatre, and pop rock music this year, listened to a ton of new albums (Will Wood might be one of the most incredible musical discoveries of my life?), and learned a ton about music theory and history. One of my favorite classes this year was Film and TV music analysis, and I got to apply my knowledge by composing the score for one of my Discord mutuals’ short films! I turned 20 and on the same day got to perform in an original musical for my friend’s composition recital. I took part in my first ever crew assignment, had two of my pieces performed at Project 21 concerts (one with a full band!), and my original Fullmetal Alchemist song Even Into Hell was choreographed for a collaboration with the school of dance, which brought my piece to such gorgeous emotional life.

I’ve gotten closer to friends old and new, and just when I’d accepted that romance probably wasn’t in the cards for me any time soon, I met (well, started DM-ing), the most amazing person through the most unexpected set of circumstances (that honestly deserves its own video sometime in the future). My brilliant internet friend-turned-parter Merlin @elsinore-and-inverness has brought so much light and joy into my life, and I can honestly say I’m the happiest I’ve been in years.

Next stop, THE UK!!! I’m not only studying abroad on a once in a lifetime Shakespeare trip, seeing loads of West End shows AND performing at the Edinburgh Fringe, but I also get to meet my favorite London boy in person :)))) could NOT be more excited

[mothrocks]

So I recently caved and watched Hazbin Hotel. I like animation, musicals, and animated musicals, so I feel like I'm kind of obligated to watch this new animated musical cartoon. After watching the show, I can't help but compare it to other animated productions that have also been released within the last year, namely that of Disney's Wish. I have a lot of thoughts, so here's this essay I spent like 2.5 hours writing :D

Slight disclaimer, I do acknowledge that Wish and Hazbin Hotel have very different themes, target audiences, production methods, pipelines, all the things. As someone who just enjoys animation, I'm going to disregard this for the most part, largely because I just want to ramble about the animation industry as a whole and probably could for hours.

Hazbin Hotel features a cast of characters trying to rehabilitate the sinners of Hell to save them from dying a second (and seemingly final) death in the afterlife. I have my own thoughts on the show itself, but I generally thought it was good. You can tell there was passion behind it and that they were allowed a lot of creative freedom, rather than having to pander as much to studio higher-ups.

I'm choosing not to summarize Wish and trusting that if you've read this far, you have at least a fragment of an idea of what the movie is about (not that there is much of a memorable plot, anyways). I don't like Wish. The characters are static and flat; there's no growth or character development and we have little to no reason to root for the main character, Asha. The story overall is unmemorable. The animation is fairly lackluster and looks unfinished. Lastly, the songs, one of the most important parts of a Disney animated musical, are just bad and incohesive and don't fit whatever vibe Disney and its producers were going for. I want to add that I don't think these qualms are the fault of the creatives behind this movie, rather, the fault of Disney executives stepping in.

Compared to Wish, Hazbin Hotel has interesting and dynamic characters, a solid art and animation style, and a wonderful soundtrack. Hazbin Hotel, despite being a show about the afterlife, has life and soul to it. This isn't to say I'm a big fan of the show, I do have criticisms of my own. My question is, how does Hazbin Hotel, an animated adult cartoon practically birthed from the internet, manage to be infinitely better than Wish, a movie by fucking Walt Disney Animation Studios? The fact that Disney, the studio behind The Lion King and Beauty and the Beast (or even more recent things like Moana and Encanto), is the same studio that produced a movie as flat and lifeless as Wish is baffling to me.

My speculation as to why this show is so much better than Wish is specifically because it was cultivated from random people on the internet who were passionate about their projects opposed to a company like Disney, who made Wish just for money (and to promote their anniversary). Disney has changed from what it once was and no longer takes risks in their storytelling or animation, only pursuing whatever writing, casting, or cost-cutting decisions that will line their pockets best. As someone who grew up watching these movies so much as a kid and learning about animation and storytelling and music from them, it's so disheartening to see any creativity within this corporation be crushed. Walt Disney Animation Studio's latest animated films since 2018 (Ralph Breaks the Internet, Frozen II, Raya and the Last Dragon, Strange World, and Wish) have all been lackluster in one way or another, with Encanto being the one exception. Disney has historically had dips in the quality of it's content, but this new trend in addition to the rise of streaming platforms (and even the introduction of AI) leads me to have little to no hope for Disney's animation going forward. Passion projects such as Hazbin Hotel are what makes me have any semblance of hope for the future of animation as a whole. Seeing one of the leading animation producers dwindle to this extent and kill any creativity brought to the table is just sad.

[kitsaystransrights]

It'sa me, Kit!

Woah, hey, you can make pinned posts! I totally didn't forget about this feature. I should probably do that, huh?

Weeeeell anyway, howdy! I'm Maddie, I go by Kit online sometimes, you can call me whichever you prefer. She/Her pronouns only, please. I'm a 22 year-old trans furry who is chronically online and geeky, so if you have a problem with that, I'm putting you in a box and then launching that box into the sun. I'm a YouTuber, Twitch streamer, filmmaker, and game dev, so I'm basically every stereotypical geeky trans-girl thing except for an artist. Can't draw to save my life.

On my YouTube, I usually make reviews or video essays about games I like, though I occasionally do stuff on other media as well. Currently, my big long-term projects are the "Splatoon 3 vs Splatoon 2" series, which is AAAAALMOST finished at the time of writing this, and my series on Leilani Wilson's Elancia Chronicles novels, (which are REALLY FREAKING GOOD and you should check them out!) I've linked a few of the videos I'm proudest of down below :)

I also stream pretty frequently on Twitch! I have a PNGtuber of my fursona, Stormy, with art done by EmmalemmaMewmew on Twitter. Stills of her will also start showing up in my YouTube videos eventually, hehe. Currently, the schedule is every Sunday, Tuesday, and Thursday, with each day being a different game. These streams always start at 7 PM Mountain Time (that's 9 PM Eastern and 6 PM Pacific) and go for around 4 hours. Sundays are Splatoon Sundays, currently the Anarchy Challenge, where I attempt to win an Anarchy Series with EVERY SINGLE WEAPON in Splatoon 3. It's hell lol. Then there's Triple-A Tuesdays, where I'm currently marathoning the Zelda series, and Indie Thursdays, where I work through my back catalog of indie games! There are also occasional bonus streams, usually around the releases of new games I'm interested in or events in ones I already play (like Splatfests!) Below is a link to my Twitch channel and my current stream schedule. I'll try to update this post as often as I can, but uh, no promises haha.

Last but not least, here's some of the other stuff I'm into/working on! Currently working on a Secret Game Project that I can't tell you about yet >:) But if you know, you know.

I'm a big fan of video games and animation (clearly), with some of my favorite stuff being, in no particular order... Sonic the Hedgehog, The Legend of Zelda, Persona, Fire Emblem, Pokemon, Elancia Chronicles, Super Lesbian Animal RPG, Splatoon, Hazbin Hotel, Helluva Boss, The Owl House, Gravity Falls, Amphibia, Steven Universe, Avatar: The Last Airbender, the Marvel Cinematic Universe, the Spider-Verse films, Dreamworks animation, Pixar animation, Insomniac's Spider-Man gams, Ratchet and Clank, aaaaaaaaaand that's all I could think of off the top of my head but I'm sure there's more junk buried in there somewhere lol.

Anyway, thanks for reading all the way to the bottom! You must really have nothing better to do with your life XD. Here's some links to my other socials, if you wanna follow me there. Here I'm mostly just be posting random rambling and updates for my YouTube and Twitch. See ya around!

https://www.instagram.com/kitthegoddess/

[salvadorbonaparte]

2024 in Films - Part III

I watched a lot of stuff again, some even for grad school.

August

Lola Rennt (1998) - banger soundtrack and editing

Vertigo (1958) - the most boring of the Hitchcock films I've seen so far

A League of Their Own (1992) - makes me want to watch baseball

White Men Can't Jump (1992) - did not expect jeopardy to be so important in this film, also loved the fashion

The Fall Guy (2024) - my mum loves the original series so we had to watch this and I had an amazing time

Blinded by the Light (2019) - the dialogue is strange at times but a banger soundtrack (obviously) and some amazing editing, very uplifting and I watched this on my flight to the US btw

Good Will Hunting (1997) - I watched this during my first week in Massachusetts before starting grad school here

Alien3 (1992) - this film says so much about gender, actually

Deaf Smith & Johnny Ears (1973) - taking lots of liberties with Texan history and also surprising homoerotic subtext

September

Causeway (2022) - a film that I originally only found meh but then kept thinking about all the time

Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979) - equally blood libel as the og with an added bonus of cycle of violence, might write an essay about this

Sleepaway Camp (1983) - another horror film that says so much about gender and I could write an entire essay about it

My Best Fiend (1999) - Werner Herzog must be studied under a microscope

We're All Going to the World's Fair (2021) - not as good as I saw the tv glow imo but asking some important questions about online communities and reality

Jacob the Liar (1974) - the film felt a little too empty but I also don't want to say something negative because I am still angry about a bad review I saw

Chris Grace: As Scarlett Johansson (2024) - absolutely transformed the way I think about stand up comedy

All Quiet on the Western Front (1930) - the old lie dulce et decorum est pro patria mori

The Shock (1923) - as ableist and racist as you expect from the 20s but with a great performance from Lon Chaney

Trap (2024) - I actually really enjoyed this, even though I was waiting for an even crazier plot twist

Don't Think I've Forgotten: Cambodia's Lost Rock and Roll (2014) - a documentary that nearly made me cry

Hudson Hawk (1991) - technically a rewatch but I need to speak my truth and it's that I like this film

All Quiet on the Western Front (2022) - I have so many issues that this would take an entire post or even conference paper

The Russians Are Coming! The Russians are Coming! (1966) - had me in stitches half the time, I love a good cold war comedy

The Bone Collector (1999) - spooky!

Monkey Shines (1988) - also horror and gender but also silly

Death in Venice (1971) - boring :/

October

UPSIDEdown (2013) - I watched this one twice, once with the director, also had lunch and coffee with him, I had an issue at first with how child protection service is portrayed but that part is apparently real, also he cast a neurodivergent kid, which is awesome

The Master (2012) - I love when men are also poorly trained attack dogs, also can you imagine sending that guy to the cult from Midsommar? Also still haunted by Philip Seymour Hoffman

Like Stars on Earth (2007) - neurodivergent kids need neurodivergent role models!!!

The Lost Honor of Katharina Blum (1975) - I have so much to say about this tbh

Farewell Disco (1990) - at first I found this kinda boring but then I was also enchanted by the inclusion of Sorbian culture

The Kangaroo Conspiracy (2022) - just read the books

November (so far)

Srikanth (2024) - fairly standard biopic, meanders a bit but solid soundtrack and performance

Innocent Witness (2019) - this one impressed me so much I recommended it to multiple people, also I'm an autistic person who is besties with my lawyer so bonus points for that, I could talk a lot about this too

Hunt (2022) - Probably less confusing if you know more about Korean history, fun plot twist and imo some homoerotic tension

Scarlett Innocence (2014) - tbh I didn't even watch the whole thing because I don't go for erotic thrillers, I just watched the scenes where Jung Woo Sung is a poor little meow meow

Inseperable Bros (2019) - some dialogue was a bit awkward but that might have been the translation, I like that this was about interabled platonic relationships

Remember You (2016) - the first plot twist is predictable as hell but the second one hit me in the face like a brick

The Childe (2023) - Kim Seon-ho has the range (creepy and babygirl) (covered in blood and coughing up blood)

The Good The Bad The Weird (2008) - not only the best western I've ever seen but also one of the best films I've seen this year at all

Sympathy for Mr Vengeance (2002) - very unsatisfying, but in a good way

[melisusthewee]

In my ongoing attempt to convince people to watch this movie (because it is so fucking good you have no idea), I put together this list of reasons why you need to watch this film. Sorry, but I can't be normal about this:

None of the backgrounds or environments are CGI! Those mountains? Those are the Andes! That's the real Valley of Tears! While filming with the actors was done in a different location (I believed they filmed in the Sierra Nevadas?), location photography and filming was done in the Andes and then spliced accordingly into the film.

It's an ensemble piece! Until now, most movies/docs/books have (understandably) focused almost exclusively on Nando Parrado and Roberto Canessa because of their 10 day trek through the mountains. But the group was more than just the two of them and this film shows that by emphasizing everyone's importance and roles in their survival.

Having said that, NANDO PARRADO IS THE FUCKING GOAT. This guy fractured his skull during the crash which caused his brain to swell. Everyone thought he was dead at first and only brought him back inside the plane when someone noticed he was still breathing. Even then, he wasn't expected to survive for very long so the others placed him where it was coldest which ended up saving his life as the cold temperature along with dehydration helped bring the swelling in his brain down. He was in a coma for three days, woke up to learn his mother was dead and his sister was dying, and decided, "Fuck this, I am getting off this mountain and you're all doing it with me." AND THEN HE DID, part of which involved hiking for 10 days across the Andes with NO GEAR.

The decision to make Numa Turcatti the narrator was brilliant. I cannot say more due to spoilers but iykyk.

Speaking of other films (looking at you, 1993's "Alive"), this movie cast exclusively Uruguayan (and some Argentinian) actors in order to give it proper authenticity.

This movie does not fuck around, with the crash happening within the first 15 minutes of the movie. And it is horrible in that it is probably one of the most accurate portrayals of a plane crash? I don't like flying, and I was incredibly anxious watching it to the point where I thought initially I might have to turn it off. But despite this, it never feels exploitive or anything. Just... real.

The entire movie was shot chronologically in order to give the make-up team an easier time with getting the actors to look increasingly gaunt and disheveled as well as adding a tighter consistency between shots and scenes. Many of the actors lost upwards of 50 lbs by the time filming was concluded.

For the avalanche scene, the actors were buried under nearly 8 inches of real snow. Because of this, the redness of their skin isn't the work of make-up or special effects but is very real.

Michael Giacchino's score. But even more importantly, his use of silence.

Honestly, this movie feels genuinely cold in a way that most movies and tv shows never quite capture. The sound of frozen clothing crunching, the frost that covers them, the clear impact of cold and frost on hair and skin, the shaking and shivering. It's really hard to describe, but like... it didn't feel like these were just actors on a set walking around. It felt genuinely cold.

The payada (rhyming/rap battle) was entirely improvised by the actors.

Enzo Vogrincic (Numa) looks like a young Adam Driver. You know you want to watch him stare soulfully into the camera for two hours. (But really, the acting in this movie is phenomenal.)

For Cold Boy fanciers, Gustavo Zerbino is basically the group's Goodsir - a cinnamon roll doing his best.

Fito Strauch's homemade sunglasses!

I could write an essay about the way the film confronts and portrays the cannibalism. Since I've rambled on long enough, let me just say here that it feels authentic in the way it's handled and not like you typically expect to see in stories like the Franklin Expedition, the Essex, or the Donner Party. (My only criticism is that it looks like they used raw chicken as the meat? And I unfortunately happen to know that human meat very much does not look like chicken.)

MOST IMPORTANTLY, this movie gives voices to those who didn't survive the mountains. And yes, it is a story about survival (and is a wonderful portrayal of positive masculinity) but it is really a story about love. Love for one's friends. Love for each other. And how love is the only way we survive.