#I could not concentrate

[amerasdreams]

ok. I am going to have this blog as backstage, the real me (hopefully without revealing all vulnerabilities) and another as frontstage, official writing. Perhaps only give ppl the writing link here bc i don't want ppl going there who I don't want, any naysayers, trolls, etc. Doesn't mean i won't post some things about writing here.

I need to have a fail safe and also an outlet. To avoid totally saying anything-- I will have a safety valve in other blog to calm me down. Perhaps a bridge to real world where i can jump out of any social media fuelled spirals. And this so I don’t start posting personal stuff there. So i have an outlet if needed.

Hopefully this system will work.

And I also have bunches of side blogs to show fragments of myself and what I care about and believe in

But here is all, (or sort of) and the real me with no veneer bc i need. Real.

[xxplastic-cubexx]

you open my Super Important Documents and its just pictures of charles xavier

[roguerambles]

Hades: "...Zeus."

Zeus: "...Hades."

Reader: "I want you both carnally so fucking bad."

Hades: "What?"

Reader: "What?"

Zeus: "Oh?"

Hades: "Zeus!"

Zeus: "I mean what?"

[tapakah0]

Animation commission for @bread-loaf-heart, thank you again >-<

[surreal-duck]

some business to take care of

[sophitz]

Hey, sorry, I can’t come into work today. One of the most impactful book series of my adolescence just acknowledged the existence of gay people for the first time after ten books. Yeah, in a positive light. No, it still has a heavily Christian audience. Yeah, I’m gonna be out all day.

[revvethasmythh]

Liliana telling Imogen, "You know how much I miss just taking care of those horses? You know how much I dream of just walking the fields and making breakfast at sunrise? All that was taken from me" really brings to mind something that Laudna said to Imogen in episode 49:

"If you wish to have a quiet life in a cozy cottage in a field, raise horses and just be, no gods or fates or destiny can keep you from that."

That's the crux of why Liliana's argument fails to be convincing. Laudna is right--at any moment in this journey, Imogen could have decided she didn't need to do this and found a cottage to settle down in. At any point in 14-16 years of wandering Exandria before finding the Verity, Liliana could have gone home and had all the things she feels were "taken" from her. But she didn't, and that was her decision, not the fault of the gods, or Predathos, or any other force she thinks kept her away. She decided she needed answers more than that cozy life she loved so much. Foisting the responsibility of that decision does not erase that it was hers

[dykedvonte]

I think a big misunderstanding is the power people give Curly to actually change things about the way the pony express operates or could’ve done things on the Tulpar.

We are talking about a company that docks pay for bad synergy despite mandated psych evals that should tell which staff members would work well together, only allots for 5 hours of sleep despite having literally no other tasks to truly do and locks all resources behind the access of one person. The last one is likely to manage resources and make it easier to justify collective punishment and blaming one person for it; someone needs something in “excess” or the captain gives in? It’s all on them your pay is docked. Instant resentment.

It’s insidious how the company works, it’s by design to distract you from coming after them, to force tensions to line their own pockets. With all the restrictions and forced interactions, altercations are bound to happen. 5 hours of sleep a day, limited sources of entertainment, no real tasks… the monotony alone would cause bad cabin fever, mix that with just only one absolute mediator and you get the exact environment that allows shit like in the game to happen.

The idea he could just complain and try to throw his weight around to get them to dig into their pocket for the crews comfort is laughable and misses the predatory and dehumanizing aspect of capitalism the Pony Express represents. Curly was and is still just another asset to them. Being a top show pony doesn’t mean he’s anywhere close to the actual top. He is the top of the working ladder, not whoever’s in corporate, he wouldn’t even be on the bottom step unlike what Jimmy perceives. The resounding recommendations he would get are almost mocking as they throw him out like nothing just like the rest. Being a shitty fucking company, how much do you bet they’d mean anything anyways, especially since he wanted to leave the field all together.

He made a fuss and they didn’t listen, he says he should’ve done more but you can tell he knows it wouldn’t have changed anything. Jobs like this are willing to make a sacrifice if it means even a penny more. Curly makes a bigger fuss they likely would’ve just found an “unrelated” reason to fire him, hired a more pliable guy or, terrifyingly, promoted Jimmy. The company was failing, going to shut down whether anything happened on the ship or not. But knowing that they were shutting down and that everyone, including him, would be out of a job with this being their last paycheck, he had to factor in not destroying the last bit of their financial stabilities combined with every other issue on the vessel and his own. He gets another cryopod or locks and then he has to break to them that they are not only fired but there will be substantial cuts to their paychecks due to the “upgrades” (things that already should’ve been in place on their part) on top of anything else that could be docked along the way.

You can blame him for saying it so early into the trip but then again, if he mentioned it later who’s to say it wouldn’t have been worse? On the capitalism side alone how would people in a galaxy away from home, out of a job and already stir crazy react? Don’t get me started on how Jimmy would have reacted if he realized he only had two days left to fix what would be a very hard to miss “problem” in his head…

I can’t even consider explaining this as devils advocate because it’s just facts of the world we and they live in and factors that heavily affected the situation. People are just so quick to make claims on the ease of the choices when P.E literally makes it hard to choose to do anything but suck it up.

[jeusus]

Hid away, your longing will only grow And you'll only grow older -- The Longing - Tamino

[psymachine]

sweet dee soothing a very drunk waitress?

girls' night 💅💋💖

[frenchonionsoop]

hmmmmm thinkin about how brutalization might look

[intotheelliwoods]

Sprut-do you know where goop man is in the current timeline? Have you seen if he still exists? Are you worried he'll find a way to break out and it'll all just repeat again? That's all for now ^-^/

I have a plan to kill it once Poptart is ready... I hope you all trust me when the time comes. The secret? Fire. Fire kills it.

[marutchi]

Arcane S02E09 | How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World

[thebedroomblues]

Alex REALLY wanted for Miles to come to him at T in the Park 2011 (x)

[red-velvet-0w0]

oh dear

i think i might be seeing where this goes next

[sereneabyyss]

While I'm glad my classes are giving me more fun ideas for fucked up science in a world created by a man who doesn't know fuck all about science. Can my classes please give me the time to write said ideas please begging on my hands and knees I want to write Shen Yuan yelling at Airplane about his bad science.

Like please I just want

Sy: why the fuck did the nectar turn pink

Airplane: oh the dirt's acidic.

Sy: what

Airplane: yeah, that flower is used as an indicator of poisons, it turns pink when in the presence of acids... Word of warning, most poisons in this world are acidic.

Sy: WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU NEED ACIDIC POISONS DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT POISON IS

Airplane: BRO BRO I NEEDED A WAY TO INDICATE THERE WAS POISON! THE NECTAR HAS PHENOLPHTHALEIN

Sy: ... YOU HACK THAT'S NOT EVEN HOW PHENOLPHTHALEIN WORKS?!

Significantly later

Sy: why does my soup smell like mac n cheese cooking

Airplane: you remember what I said about poisons being mostly acidic?

Sy: .......... I'm going to go kill a coward, and then you're next