#I could also see her working with Kelsea Ballerini | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

felicitysmoaksx · 8 months ago

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Hi, everyone. Thanks so much for reading! I had a plan for this chapter, it was going to be about 5k in total, but the characters had other plans so this is being split into two parts once again! Happy reading! Song recs are: The Little Things by Kelsea Ballerini, The Other POV by Khloe Rose, and Kill Ur Vibe by All Time Low

Rating: Explicit (Minors DNI 18+)

Summary: Sarah returns to work following her injury and Justin's death. (Did she also mention that she was four months pregnant and had also 'popped' overnight?

Word Count: 2.6k

Warnings: implied Sexual Content, inaccurate therapy session, unplanned pregnancy, inaccurate pregnancy depictions, and some slight survivor guilt

Read On AO3 | Fic Playlist | Fic Playlist but Less Shippy | Want to be tagged when I post a Rheese story?

Sometimes Sarah wondered how she got here. She thought, staring at her raven-haired boyfriend. With this wonderful man, who probably should’ve run away from her a long time ago, but instead stayed by her side like he was superglue. This man was arguably the sexiest man she had ever seen, but not only that…Connor was kind. Connor was protective and admittedly, could be a bit of a mother hen. But it was only because he cared, deeply. He cared about everything. From his patients to his friends and family and for some reason he cared and loved her.

So yeah, sometimes Sarah thought about how she got here and how different everything was in her life. Especially the biggest change to come…Her hand moved without thought, resting over her still flat stomach. Only…it wasn’t still flat.

Getting out of bed, she crossed the room to stand in front of the mirror and saw that her stomach now had a small swell to it. According to all the books, she had finally popped. Honestly, they made it sound like she was a piece of popcorn. She thought to herself, turning and running her hand over the small swell of her stomach. Even though the shirt was oversized, there was no denying she was pregnant now. Before, it had just looked like she had put on some extra weight.

A muffled noise came from the bed. Then the man in the bed turned. She watched, struggling not to laugh as Connor stretched out a hand to find her. And when he didn’t find her his sleepy, “Babe?”

“Over here,” she called softly. Connor shifted to sit up with one hand rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

“Another nightmare-” He yawned but stopped short when he caught sight of her, of her stomach His eyes widened a little, “Oh, wow.”

“I know,” Sarah swept another hand across her boulder-like stomach. Her boyfriend moved so he stood right behind her, arms wrapped around her waist. His hands were covering her own. She nuzzled her face into his neck. His lips pressed to the side of her forehead.

“Guess the cat will be out of the bag now,” Sarah said in a quiet voice. Connor hummed in agreement. It wasn’t like they had been trying to keep it a secret. But in the grand scheme of things, between Justin passing, Sarah seeing Dr. Richardson again at Hank’s request, and everything else in between with Sarah’s recovery, telling people that they were expecting wasn’t the first thing on their minds. Besides, it was nice having something to themselves for a little while.

“Are you sure you’re ready to come back? It’s not too late to change your mind. You could take another week,” he mused quietly, squeezing her more to him.

“I’m going stir crazy enough as it is,” Sarah shook her head at the suggestion. “Hank and Erin are already back at work and besides that, working will provide me with some stability. And I should go back now because, in another five months, I’ll be out for maternity leave.”

Connor bit his tongue. Because they both knew it didn’t quite work like that. Grief didn’t work like that. But he didn’t tell his girlfriend that. Instead, he told her carefully, “I just don’t want you to push yourself to do too much too soon.”

“And you think another week will fix that?” Sarah asked, pulling her face out of his neck.

“I think another week would help you mentally prepare for helping people dealing with their most difficult times after you had been through something so traumatic yourself,” Connor ducked his head down to kiss her neck. His lips were so careful around the still-healing scar of her bullet wound. Though Ava had deemed it healed enough that it didn’t need a bandage on it anymore.

That was a difficult conversation to have. Sarah felt insecure when she looked at the scar. The deep cavernous indentation that wasn’t quite a hole anymore but it certainly wasn’t gone either. It wasn’t attractive, the brunette knew that. Adding that to the scarring she had on her back from her burns and then Connor treating her as if she were glass just waiting to break didn’t help matters either.

Dr. Richardson noticed a day when her insecurities were getting the best of her and when the brunette confessed what was wrong, encouraged her to do two things: put something that made her feel attractive and then have an honest conversation with him about it.

[LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK]

“What is bothering you most about approaching Connor with this?” The older woman posed the question to Sarah. The brunette shrugged, “I guess the unknown variable. What if I’m right and he does find me unattractive because of my scars both seen and unseen but he doesn’t feel like he can leave me right now because of everything that’s happened? Or ever because I’m having his child and he’s forever tied to me because of it?”

“This is the first time you’ve mentioned your pregnancy outside of our first appointment since you’ve started back seeing me again. But we can circle back to that.” The psychiatrist made a note, “And if that happens, if you’re right. What then?”

“Then I’ll have to be the one to walk away and I’m…Connor is a good man. He’s the best relationship I’ve ever had in my time as an adult. I love him. I don’t want to walk away. But what if that isn’t enough anymore? What if this is all too much for him but he can’t say it because of everything that’s happened to me? Or because of our baby?”

Dr. Richardson made another note before noticing the time on the clock on the wall behind Sarah. “Okay, we need to find a stopping point. So I want to leave it here and encourage you to talk to Connor about what you’re feeling. You’ve told me he’s honest, kind, and a good man. So be honest with him and see where that leads you, Sarah. Because sooner or later, you’ll have to know and we’ll discuss it next week.”

[LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK]

Looking back at it now, Sarah thought she could have handled the conversation better than just blurting out, “You don’t find me attractive anymore, do you?”

And watching her boyfriend look so dumbfounded at her words. She’ll never forget the look on his face as she continued, “I mean, I know I wasn’t much before everything happened, but I’m not attractive anymore am I?”

Then he proved just how wrong she was in her thinking. But that was a story for another time. She didn’t want to think about that right now. Instead, she wanted…

“Love me,” she moaned quietly as she leaned into his touch. Connor captured her lips in response, pulling her back to the bed.

“How is it today?” Her boyfriend asked quietly while they were basking in the afterglow of their lovemaking.

[LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK]

“Sarah, you’re a psychiatrist.” Dr. Richardson reminded her during a session when the curly-haired brunette admitted to feeling guilty because she felt normal one day because it felt like she was moving on way too soon from Justin’s death, “If you were to have a patient tell you this, what would be your response?”

“Grief is something that rapidly changes from day to day,”

“Exactly. Grief isn’t linear. Some days you’ll wake up, and getting out of bed will be a struggle. Some days you’ll wake up and be angry or sad. Sometimes you’ll wake up like today and be perfectly fine.” The woman nodded, agreeing, “You need to treat yourself with care, Sarah. Grief will never completely go away, but don’t feel guilty for the good days you do have.”

[LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK]

“It’s there, but it doesn’t hurt as much today,” Sarah told him quietly, pressing a kiss to the permanent love bite she left on his shoulder.

“If that changes?” Connor ran a hand down her back. Another kiss was placed on his shoulder, “You’ll be one of the first ones I tell…What if none of my clothes fit? I haven't had a chance to get maternity clothes yet. They must’ve known I was going back today.”

“Or they knew we’re going to be checking in on them with the ultrasound today,” her boyfriend grinned, patting her newly swollen stomach softly.

“I might be on the early side of showing, but the book’s and Dr. Grant both say the baby won’t be kicking for another few months: until I’m at least six months or later considering this is my first pregnancy…and what?”

“What?”

“You have this weird grin on your face. Why?” Why? He was probably reading too much into her words; no he definitely knew he was reading too much into her words. But she had said first pregnancy and that had conjured images of them…with a sibling for this child. But Connor didn’t want to freak her out because they hadn’t even had this baby yet. So he ran a hand through her curls as he said, “I’m just happy.”

[LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK] [LINE BREAK]

“Have you thought any more about moving in with me?” Connor prodded in the elevator while they were on the way down to the parking garage. He had floated the question last week during dinner one night. And it was logical, they were about to be tied together forever by their baby. And yet…Sarah didn’t want to move in just because it was smart and made sense.

And hadn’t they seen this film before? Connor moving in with his broken and recovering girlfriend and it blowing up in their faces? All of it was starting to feel too similar. (There was that secondhand deja vu again.)

“Or we can find a different apartment if the idea of moving into my space is what’s bothering you.” Sarah shot him a look and her boyfriend shrugged with a smirk.

“I can see the gears turning in your head,”

“I don’t want to move in together just because we’re having a baby. That’s about as dated as getting married because we’re having a baby out of wedlock.” She told him before pausing. Then the brunette turned sharply to her boyfriend, wagging her finger at him. “Don’t you even dare think about proposing to me right now, Connor Rhodes. I will say no.”

“So wait nine months after the kid is born, got it.” He snorted and when she shot him another pointed look; it turned into a full-blown laugh as the elevator opened with a ding to the parking garage.

“You’re ridiculous, but more like twelve months,” Sarah rolled her eyes fondly before he opened the door to his car for her. He leaned in to peck her lips. “But I’m yours and you love me.”

“Why do you want to move in with me? Outside of the practical reasons because of our baby?” She asked after he pulled out of the garage and they were cruising down the road. The hand he had on her thigh flexed. They stopped at a red light and he glanced at her. His blue eyes were practically shimmering.

“The baby is the main reason I want this sooner than later. But I’d like to think we were always headed towards this. Because you said it yourself a few months ago. You spend five nights out of the week at my place. More often than not though, you don’t even go back to your apartment. Over half of your stuff is at my place by now. So why are you paying thirteen hundred dollars a month for a place, that doesn’t even have an elevator and you spend maybe a week at? Each month?”

“So you always saw us living together?”

“I always thought that’s what we’re working towards.” Connor shrugged at her question while they started moving again. His hand flexed again as his thumb started rubbing circles into her skin. Such a possessive action. It was something Sarah never found attractive in a man before, but the difference between her exes and Connor? Connor was possessive in private, unless provoked. (She had seen this firsthand because Joey liked to test this boundary and her boyfriend was quick to put him in his place.) Like the love bites on her body, his possessive actions were for them, only.

“But I’ve thought this was a relationship sooner than you did,” he said, pulling Sarah out of her thoughts.

“Huh?”

“We weren’t on the same page until we were four months in,” Connor explained, “I thought we were a couple sooner than you did. So I think I’m a little quicker to jump for this because of that.”

“When did you start to think of this as a relationship?”

“I-“ he hesitated and Sarah was pleasantly amused to see a flush crawling up her calm, cool, and collective boyfriend’s neck. “I’m not sure I want to tell you that because it’ll come out in a weird way.”

She just grinned at him. Then she laid her hand over his resting on her thigh. Connor sighed.

“The day you called me Dr. Rhodes in bed for the first time.” He muttered as he maneuvered his way into the other lane. The brunette felt her mouth drop open, a laugh bubbling its way off of her lips.

“So many things to unpack here,” Sarah started, still laughing even as Connor pinched her thigh lightly. “But we had only been sleeping together for about two weeks at that point.”

“Yeah, so?”

…So he had only been broken up from Robin for about two months? Or was it three? She couldn’t remember…and why did her brain keep circling back to his and Robin’s relationship? Why did she keep comparing them?

“I also think that’s the first time you rode me too,” Connor commented and Sarah whipped her head to face him, but her boyfriend was staring at the road.

Sarah felt her cheeks heating as she said, “Connor, you can’t just say that!”

A red light caught them again. They were nearing the hospital now. Her boyfriend faced her, a wicked gleam in his blue eyes. His rapidly darkening blue eyes-the way they did when they had sex. She shivered.

“Why? We’re the only ones in the car and you were thinking way too much and I needed to get you out of your head somehow. Since we’re in the car, I’m limited as to what I can do…” His hand moved a little higher up her thigh.

“Because I think the last time you talked dirty to me,” she started trying to ground him back to reality, the brunette grabbed the hand on her thigh and placed it on her swollen stomach, “This happened.”

“You act like I’m afraid to put another baby in you,” he pecked her lips quickly, before he went back to driving, “I’m not.” (If only they knew…)

“Connor,” she sputtered, while they pulled into the hospital parking lot and waited in line for a valet to come and take his car. Her boyfriend kissed her again, this one their tongue met but it was fleeting.

“It’s true,” Connor muttered against her lips, before he leaned his forehead against hers. “You know how proud I am of you, baby?”

“I haven’t done anything yet,”

“I’m still proud of you for trying.” Connor reiterated firmly with another kiss on her forehead. “And if it doesn’t work out coming back this soon, you know that’s okay too.”

(If only Sarah knew it wasn’t going to be a good day, but not for the reason everyone thought.)

#chicago med #one chicago #rheese #connor rhodes #sarah reese #my writing

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strangenewfriends · 1 year ago

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"WHAT IS GOING on here? Why are idiot fans throwing stuff during live shows? It’s reached a crisis point in the past couple weeks—a disturbing and loathsome epidemic of fan aggression against performers. On Wednesday, Kelsea Ballerini got hit in the face when a concertgoer threw a bracelet at her—just the latest case of a female artist assaulted in the middle of a show. Why is this happening, and how do we stop it?

Ballerini was in Boise, Idaho, doing her country-pop hit “If You Go Down (I’m Goin’ Too),” when the bracelet came out of nowhere and hit her face, right near her left eye. She left the stage, but then returned to finish her show. “Can we talk about what just happened?” she said, in admirably clear terms. “Don’t throw things, you know? I just always want shows of mine—every show, for every artist—but I’m in control of this one. I just want it to be a safe place for everyone. Can you help me do that tonight?”

It’s not an isolated case. Bebe Rexha needed three stitches after she got hit by a thrown iPhone at a NYC rooftop show on June 18, and posted a photo of her frighteningly bruised and bandaged face. The alleged assailant, a 27-year-old man, told police, “I was trying to see if I could hit her with the phone at the end of the show because it would be funny.” He also helpfully explained, “It’s a TikTok trend.” Oh.

Two days later, Ava Max was assaulted by a man who crashed the stage at an L.A. show and slapped her in the face. She posted, “He slapped me so hard that he scratched the inside of my eye.” A couple days later, in London’s Hyde Park, Pink got interrupted mid-song by someone throwing a bag of their dead mother’s ashes. A true pro, Pink asked, “Is this your mom?” Then she put down the bag and said, “I don’t know how I feel about this.”

It can’t be overstated how much this sucks. Miley Cyrus recently declared she doesn’t feel safe doing arena shows anymore. As she explained, “There’s no connection. There’s no safety.”

Ballerini posted an update to her Instagram Story on Thursday, saying, “hi. i’m fine. someone threw a bracelet, it hit me in the eye, and it more so just scared me than hurt me. we all have triggers and layers of fears way deeper than what is shown, and that’s why i walked offstage to calm down and make sure myself, band and crew, and the crowd all felt safe.”

How did we get here? These are important artists with things to say and music to make. It’s not their job to explain why idiots shouldn’t throw things at them onstage. But it’s simpler than that—they’re human beings. What these incidents have in common is a bizarre lack of respect, a main-character neediness for attention, a child’s ignorance of boundaries. This isn’t fan enthusiasm going overboard—this is hostility disguised as fandom.

So: it’s weird that this needs to be said, but don’t throw things at the artist, mmmmkay? No matter how soft and fluffy it seems. A cute li’l stuffed animal turns into a weapon if it hits somebody, as happened to Lady Gaga in Toronto last fall. A bracelet can do serious damage. Somebody threw a lollipop at David Bowie in 2004, in Norway, and almost blinded him. A lollipop. Nobody wants concerts to turn into airport-security hellholes with body-cavity searches. Your elderly loved ones do not need the aggravation of amending their wills to say, “BTW, after I die, if it ever seems like a cool idea to bombard a hard-working music legend with the remains of my incinerated corpse, switch to decaf and think again.”

Why now? So much of it comes down to the pandemic. People got out of practice at going to shows, so they forgot how to be audiences. Or else they just started their concertgoing years now, without having learned from being part of an experienced audience. But in 18 months of isolation, the whole fan culture around live music shut down—the traditions, the habits, the manners, the codes of honor, the spirit of “act like you’ve been there before.” It was a disastrous loss for music and the community around it. When live music returned, some fans were desperate to get back into the action, but without remembering the details of how to handle themselves in an IRL crowd. That’s how you get a grown adult boasting he threw a piece of metal at a celebrity to join a “TikTok trend.”

But this wave of fan aggression evokes those horror stories from the Seventies, like the notorious 1971 incident when a London concertgoer pushed Frank Zappa off the stage, putting him in a wheelchair and nearly breaking his neck. Or when “some stupid with a flare gun” burned down the Montreux Casino, inspiring Deep Purple to write “Smoke on the Water.” (Respect to the late great Funky Claude, who ran back into the burning building to pull kids out.) Over time, audiences gradually learned how to be cool in a concert crowd, until the coronvirus. So there’s a lot of Some Stupid going around.

There’s always been a certain etiquette for live music. It’s taken a beating in the social-media age, as more people treat the live show as a backdrop to stage click-chasing viral stunts.

But it’s unquestionably gotten worse post-pandemic. Last summer, Kid Cudi walked out on the Rolling Loud festival in Miami. “I will fucking leave,” he warned the crowd. “If I get hit with one more fucking thing��if I see one more fucking thing on this fucking stage, I’m leaving. Don’t fuck with me.” Someone then hit him with a water bottle—and bragged about it on Twitter, because of course he did.

Tyler the Creator issued a public plea last year for concertgoers to stop throwing things. “I don’t understand the logic of throwing your shit up here,” Tyler ranted mid-show. “Not only for safety reasons, but bro, I don’t want your shit. I don’t want it. Like, I’m not even being funny. Every show someone throws something up here, and I don’t understand the logic. Why do you think I want your shit? Then if I slip and break my foot? Stop throwing that fucking shit up here, bro!” He went on to say, “Fucking dick-fuck.”

But that message was evidently too subtle for some folks. Steve Lacy stopped a New Orleans show in October when somebody hit him in the leg with a camera. Lacy said, “Don’t throw shit on my fucking stage,” then smashed the camera and left. Rosalia got hit in the face with a bouquet of roses, in San Diego. “Please don’t throw things on the stage,” she tweeted (in Spanish). “And if you’re such motomamis that you throw them anyway, throw them on the opposite side from where I am.” Harry Styles, whose live vibe is the essence of generosity and openness, has gotten his boundaries invaded by Skittles-tossers and chicken-nugget-hurlers. Nobody could blame him for being less than okay with it.

There’s always been a tradition of acts who encourage fans to throw their bras, panties, or flowers. That’s just consensual show-biz. A Tom Jones concert wasn’t complete without tipsy ladies pelting him with their hotel room keys. When a fan threw a bat onstage, Ozzy Osbourne assumed it was a rubber toy, so he playfully took a bite—then became the first rock star ever rushed to the ER for rabies shots after a dose of batflesh. Punk rockers often thrived on the dust-ups. At the Sex Pistols’ famous final gig, Greil Marcus reported that the band got hit with “ice, cups, shoes, coins, pins and probably rocks.” Johnny Rotten complained, “There’s not enough presents. You’ll have to throw up better things that.” Immediately, someone threw a rolled-up umbrella. Johnny replied, “That’ll do.”

But during the pandemic, for many fans, their primary source of human contact was social media, where there is no perk for non-asshole behavior and nothing but rewards for finding novel ways to be a dick. There are so many incentives to create a viral moment, so it seems acceptable to interrupt a show to make strangers notice you. Throwing your phone at something to get its attention—you wouldn’t do that to a squirrel, much less a human, so why would anyone do it to an artist they’ve paid money to see? But social-media culture breeds a new kind of fan mentality defined by parasocial resentment, where fandoms feel so possessive about their faves, they get outraged when their fave doesn’t live up to their demands. It takes a toll on simple human empathy. Our whole culture picked up so many toxic habits it will take years to unlearn.

It doesn’t have to be this way. Almost exactly two years ago, I saw a symbolic return for live music when Madison Square Garden reopened with a super-emotional Foo Fighters show. It felt like all of us in the room were figuring out from scratch how to be fans again. I described it at the time as an “invitation to start remembering how to celebrate together.” Needless to say, the return of live music turned out to be a lot messier than that—lots of stops and starts, lots of conflict and controversy, lots of fear and grief and anger.

But this is the first summer when it’s felt like live shows are really back. My music summer began a month ago with Taylor Swift on her Eras Tour. I saw The Cure and Dead & Company on back-to-back nights, two tribal gatherings that felt like the most uplifting kind of communal devotion. In the past couple weeks, I’ve seen loads of brilliant punk rock (Protomartyr, Wednesday, the Dolly Spartans, the So So Glos, Bar Italia), comeback gigs from old-school heroes (The Feelies, Love and Rockets), and a Beatles tribute band, the Fab Faux (damn fine “Martha My Dear”). It’s time travel, hitting so many different eras of my life as a music fan—past, present, and future. I’ve been trading stories with friends having similar epiphanies this month at Joni Mitchell or DJ Premier or LCD Soundsystem. We were all hungrier for this than we even realized.

The mass rapture of the live show—it’s a fragile temporary community that comes together for a night. Whether it’s in a sleazy bar or a basement or a stadium, it’s a place we go so we can experience those raptures in the dark with strangers, to be part of a story that doesn’t happen when we’re listening by ourselves. But those moments don’t happen without a certain level of mutual trust and respect. And they can’t even begin when the performer can’t trust the audience. We’re all in the crowd for the same reason—to create that space where this rapture can happen. But it’s not something the artists or the industry can conjure up on our behalf. It’s on us to be an audience that the performer can believe in. That’s really where the music begins."

#rob sheffield #posting this because its worth restating

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luucypevensie · 1 year ago

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🐰 + the bestest Slytherin Cord!!

YAS MY LIL’ SLYTHERIN BB! THANK YOU FAE!

1. Their berserk button: Cord doesn’t like it when someone doesn’t pull their weight in school assignments/projects and leaves her to do all the work. She is not your personal servant, either you put in the effort or the two of you are BOTH going down

2. Why their name was chosen: She was named after her paternal grandmother and her mother; Cordelia’s parents wanted to honor her father’s mother, plus they love that Cordelia means “heart” because they wanted their daughter to have heart

3. Their favorite 2020s song: Penthouse by Kelsea Ballerini

4. Their biggest fear: Losing her aunt Drea and Harry because they’re the only family she has left

5. One turn-on of theirs: Seeing someone in their element (like Harry in Quidditch or teaching in DA)

6. Their go-to sleepover activities: Disney movies; seriously, Cord just LOVES having a Disney movie marathon at a sleepover, and she was so excited to do that with Daphne and Tracey when she introduced them to the movies. Also, so much junk food (a mix of wizard sweets like Cauldron Cakes and Licorice Wands with Muggle sweets like Cadbury Dairy Milk and Crunchies)

7. What candle they’d get at Bath & Body Works: You know, I actually can see Cord getting this one candle called Coffee & Whiskey (a candle that contains smells of Irish Whiskey, Vanilla, and a hint of Coffee)

8. A moment when they reached their breaking point: Pansy had just called her a Mudblood again, and Cord just SNAPPED because her family being non magical shouldn’t matter. Who she is as a person, THAT is what should matter. As a result, she jumped on Pansy (who wasn’t expecting that at all) and just starting scratching and pulling at anything she could get her hands on

9. Whether they’re organized or slobby: Cord’s pretty organized; not CRAZY organized though

10. Their favorite feature about themselves: Her smile

#oc: cordelia grey #fic: peace #u: hp #anti jk rowling #oc asks #daughter-of-melpomene #THANKS AGAIN FAE!

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hvneybxns · 11 months ago

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(—) ★ spotted!! ARCHIE SINCLAIR on the cover of this week’s most recent tabloid! many say that the 23 year old looks like DRAKE RODGER, but i don’t really see it. while the ACTOR is known for being CHARMING my inside sources say that they have a tendency to be ARGUMENTATIVE i swear, every time i think of them, i hear the song PETER PAN BY KELSEA BALLERINI. {he/him / cis man}

archie sinclair felt like he was born to look after someone else from the day he was born. born with a second half of him, and two parents that were still children themselves he was set up to be some sort of mess.

emotionally intelligent before his time he figured out that things weren’t normal in his family, and he also figure out that austen was making no ones life easy so he did what he felt he had to and became the balance to her. the quiet to the storm. he would always follow her lead, but with a kinder tone, more understanding, empathy no five year old should have really had as he followed his sister as she marched off.

where austen made it pretty obvious how mad at their parents she was, archie was calm, he wanted to know them, his mom more than anything and he’d always ask how long he had to wait till she was back, counting down each day she was away, just to himself.

the only time he showed any flare was when it came to protecting his sister, following in each of her footsteps to make sure he was there to catch her when she fell.

when his mom came to take them away archie was secretly thrilled, having never enjoyed the work his grandparents had thrown him into, he didn’t want to be a signing sensation like his mom, he could sing better than most for his age but he wanted to be on camera. he wanted to act.

still he was happy to drop the work for a while, following austen wherever she went, but as her offers for films came in, so did his, the clark kent looks he had inherited from his dad in high demand the more he grew into them. several films, nominations and awards later and archie felt like he had found his place in the world, close enough to keep an eye on austen and keep her from spinning, but far enough away that he was his own person through it all too.

when austen fell from the pedestal he had put her on getting caught on camera doing drugs at a party he took it to heart, like he’d finally failed to keep her safe from something, too busy away with work to be there to stop anyone from filming her.

ever since he’s hovered more than normal, only taking work that keeps him around his sister.

he’s a quiet and charming soft boy with his daddies looks and momma’s soft touch.

will do anything for everyone, is known for playing the teenage heart throb.

#archie sinclair | intro

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thatfanficstuff · 3 years ago

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Miss Me More - Caius Volturi

Pairing: Caius Volturi x Reader

Warnings: nope

A/N: Celebration Summer #20. This fic is inspired by Miss Me More by Kelsea Ballerini.

***

Loving Caius Volturi meant change. Lots of it. After all he was a king and you were just you.

“There are certain expectations if you’re going to be with me,” he’d said one night as you sat by the fire.

Your eyes snapped to him in surprise. “What sort of expectations?”

He gave you that soft smile you loved so much. The one that had you agreeing to that first date. “Nothing major, my love. Just a few little…changes.”

***

Jane stood in front of you holding a dress nicer than anything you’d ever worn. You shook your head. “That’s a little over the top, isn’t it? I’m just walking around the castle. What’s wrong with what I normally wear?”

“Your clothes were fine when you were simply a member of the guard, but you represent Master Caius now. Your appearance reflects on him.” She smiled at you, waiting for you to comply.

You sighed and took the dress from her. You had your own funky style and you loved it. This dress so wasn’t you. “Can I at least go shopping and get some dresses that are more me?”

Jane’s smile grew tight. “That is unnecessary. Your closet has already been filled with the appropriate attire.”

“Oh.” You slipped into the dress and turned for Jane to see.

She clapped her hands together. “Perfect. Now, I’ll help you with your makeup.”

“I can do my own makeup,” you assured her.

“Master Caius has suggested that I help you find a more neutral style.”

You felt a pang in your chest. Were you really so wrong the way you were? You picked up your favorite signature red lipstick and showed it to her. “But—”

She snatched the tube from your hand and threw it in the trash. “Let’s try a nice light coral instead.”

***

You’d spent the evening entertaining vampires from another coven. You felt like a stranger in your own skin. This dress. The makeup. It just wasn’t you.

“You were very quiet this evening,” Caius observed as he escorted you back to his room. “Are you alright?”

You simply hummed hoping he’d take it as an affirmative. You’d had a knot in your belly since Jane had shown up with the dress and were afraid of what you’d say if you opened your mouth.

He nodded in thought. “Your appearance was perfect. Nicely done, my sweet.”

You twisted your hands together wondering how long you were expected to wear the dress. Somehow you thought Caius would be displeased if you donned your favorite sweats.

“I’ll have Jane replace your footwear,” your love said almost absently.

Your brow furrowed. “What?”

He smiled as he moved to you and placed his hands on your waist. He pressed a kiss to your lips. “You and I are nearly the same height, Y/N. Three-inch heels make you taller than me. That’s hardly appropriate.”

***

Caius walked into your room with a frown. You set your book aside. “What is it?”

“I understand you went shopping with Demetri and Felix yesterday,” he said.

You frowned. They were your best friends. He knew that. He also said you could only go if you took guards with you. You didn’t see the problem. “What of it?”

He crossed his arms over his chest. “It isn’t appropriate for someone of your station to befriend the guard.”

You stood to your feet and mirrored his position. “I am the guard.”

“No. You were the guard. Now, you are my companion. Next time take Afton and Sebastian. I wish for you to limit your time with Demetri and Felix.” And with that, he turned and left the room.

***

It was one thing after another. You were too loud. Too quiet. Too reckless. Too careful. Every day they chipped away a little more of who you were. And you let them. You let them form you into the perfect partner for Caius because you loved him. Couldn’t live without him. And this is what he wanted. Wasn’t it?

“This isn’t working, Y/N,” he said to you one afternoon.

You blinked in shock. “What do you mean?” Your voice broke and you hated it but felt like you’d earned it.

“You’re just not the woman I fell in love with anymore. Your very presence used to bring joy to my life. Now…We’re done. I’ll have your things moved to your old rooms.”

***

You stayed in your room for a week. Everyone thought you were mourning. Coming to terms with the end of the relationship. In reality, you were finding yourself again. You had the dresses sent back to Caius’s room along with the shoes. You snuck out one cloudy afternoon and replaced your wardrobe and found that perfect shade of red lipstick.

At the end of that week, you dressed in your favorite outfit including your boots with the five-inch heels. You painted your lips red and blasted the playlist that Caius hated. Halfway through the third song there was a knock at your door. You swung it open to find Demetri and Felix smiling at you.

You squealed in happiness and threw your arms around their necks. Demetri looked you over as you released him. “You look good. You look like you. How are you?”

“I’m…happy to be me.”

***

Nearly six months after Caius had broken things off with you, he came across you in the gardens. You were playing some song he hated while you danced around with Demetri and Felix. His eyes followed you as you laughed and twirled as you sparkled in the sun. You were well and truly happy and he felt that familiar tug he used to have with you. That desire to be with you and only you.

He started to approach you until you twirled into Demetri’s arms and he kissed you soundly. You laughed again, the sweet sound filling the air. Caius gave you one last longing look before disappearing back into the cold castle.

#Caius Volturi x reader #twilight fanfiction #caius volturi fanfiction #caius volturi x you #celebration summer

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musette22 · 2 years ago

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Ohhhhhh Minnie I need some help from you and your lovely lovely followers.

Tis’ has happened again. I have fallen for someone and I can’t get up. In laymen’s terms, I have a big fat Chris Evans’ peachy ass sized 🍑❤️ crush on someone.

She’s a tumblr user and we’ve been mutuals for 2 years, seriously interacting for 1 year chatting on here for about 9 months and just recently we’ve switched to daily chats on discord and did a face reveal. (SHES SO CUTE!!!! And she called ME adorable!) she’s 23 (same age as me) and lives about 12 hours away by car in another state. But it could be much worse. She’s a journalist and we have so much in common! We both love horror movies, marvel, stucky, (good) country music, and Taylor (like if we got married I don’t think our house would be able to take the love of Taylor from us both. The foundations would crack that’s how much we both love Taylor) she’s sweet and funny and a little self deprecating and she IS GAYYYY or at least bi? But definitely into girls which is AWESOME! No mystery there.

We started outrageously flirting through our inboxes about 6 months ago now and like that to me was just fun you know? A little tumblr girlfriends thing but now that we’ve talked more I’m like holy shit… I HAVE GOT IT BAD FOR THIS CHICK. I don’t want to ruin the friendship we have and I am still SUPER unsure if my feelings could be even a little bit mutual but I LOVE talking to her. We talk about everything. Deep things even? I already feel like I know so much about her and maybe it’s my stupid heart but deep down I feel like if we gave it a chance this could really be special, she could even be “the one” and I KNOW ITS CRAZY TO SAY THAT! But we just seem so compatible already. We’ve even talked about what it would be like if we were roommates bc she possibly wants to move to the same city I do and we talked about our bad living habits and even with those we still seem compatible haha 😂

Should I jump right in with my heart first as our favorite artist Kelsea Ballerini would advise or should I just let this go? Should I wait and be friends for a bit longer first? I’m just sooooooo torn.

Pls ask Ms Lily what I should do as well. I need as many pointers and opinions as possible. Love you lots girlie! 🤍❤️🤍❤️ -Sophie

Sophieeeeeeeeeeeee, baby!!! 😍😍 Omg this sounds AMAZING 🙌🏻 Listen, it's rare to find someone you connect with on this level and that you're also attracted to so of COURSE my advice would be to go for it! And hey, you don't have to go all out right away, you could just be like 'would you be up for meeting up sometime?' or maybe, if that's not an option at the moment, suggest skyping/zooming/teamsing sometime so that you guys can talk face to face and see how that goes? That might tell you a lot about how compatible you might really be, and it's easier to subtly flirt then too, maybe? Let me know what you decide to do and how it works out for you, honey!! This is so exciting ❤️❤️

If anyone else has any other good advice for Sophie, please feel free to chime in!!

#minnie answers

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thrillridesz · 4 years ago

Text

walkin’ in time ▫ sangyeon

➳ pairing: single dad!sangyeon x female kindergarten teacher!reader

➳ genre: fluff, angst, single dad!au, kindergarten teacher!au

➳ warnings: mentions of divorce

➳ word count: 11.6k

➳ special thanks: @fullsunsays for helping me to proofread and offering her invaluable opinions when this fic was still halfway done + @ateez-little-star who i have cameoed in this fic for being such a sweet mutual and a lovely friend of mine here on tumblr!

a/n : only semi edited!

“Goodbye, Miss y/n!”

You flashed Sungchan a warm smile despite the tired look in your eyes and your less-than-presentable appearance with your messy, tousled hair and paint splattered clothes from a long day at the kindergarten. The boy flashed a toothy grin at you as he held onto his mother’s hand, tottering away cheerfully and at the corner of your eye, you caught Chanhee looking at you with admiration in his expression.

“Wow, the kids sure do like you a lot. Much more than the rest of us for sure.”

You felt your cheeks grow hot at the compliment as you lowered your head shyly. You are not one to be used to receiving compliments but ever since you started your job here at Sunny Hearts Kindergarten, it seemed as if everyone had nothing but praise for your performance - both parents, fellow teachers and students alike. Since you were a high schooler, you had always known that you loved working with children. There was just something about the little ones with their bright smiles and lively mannerisms that warmed your heart. To be able to be in a job that allowed you to light up the lives of the future generation and possibly make an everlasting impact in their educational journey, it all felt extremely exciting to you.

“Thanks, Chanhee.” You said softly, a sweet smile gracing your face. Just then, you became briefly aware of a presence lingering behind you and you swivelled around to see Jeno, a doe-eyed boy from your art class. Instantly, you could tell that there was something wrong. His eyes were red and you could tell that the polo tee he wore was tear-stained and you could vaguely hear light sniffling from him. He tugged nervously at your skirt and you knelt down until you were level with him.

“Hey buddy, why are you crying?” You asked in a concerned voice, ruffling his soft hair lightly.

He lifted his head tentatively, peering at you from beneath his eyelashes where a stray teardrop hung and you very gently rubbed it away as he remained silent as though he was too shy or upset to speak. Looking around, Jeno’s eyes swept the room and you realised what was going on. The lobby was almost empty by now with all the cubicles for the children’s bags all emptied and shoes from the shoe cabinet all gone. The sky was darkening with every second as a low, eerie rumbling sound came with a looming patch of dark clouds. The familiar sounds of chatters and laughter had completely disappeared by now only to be replaced by a lonely, deafening silence. With a backpack that was clearly too large for him, Jeno’s shoulders were slumped over and his expression drooped sadly, causing your heart to ache for him.

“It’s ok, your daddy will be here really soon! He’s probably just busy but he’ll be here.” You coaxed, holding and rubbing his tiny hands in yours and feeling the tension dissipate slightly from his being.

Beside you, Chanhee shook his head in disapproval, tutting.

“The man is always late.”

You didn’t say anything in return as you bite down on your lower lip, unsure of what to say. You knew that Jeno’s father was a busy man and the times you had actually been able to meet him in person, he looked exactly like a man overworked in his office job. Lee Sangyeon was almost always late to any parent teacher meeting or closing time, sometimes even entirely failing to show up as evident from the times when Jeno’s grandmother showed up instead. The few times you had seen him, he had bags under his eyes and had an unkempt appearance with a mangled tie and wrinkled office shirt almost every single time. As a single father, it was obvious to everyone how hard he worked just by the way he looked so deeply exhausted yet so alert for the next call from his office. There had been quite a number of times when Sangyeon had had to excuse himself just to take a call in the middle of fetching Jeno.

Although you try to keep your work separate from your personal feelings, you had to admit that many times, you had felt your heart beat just a tad too quickly whenever you did see Sangyeon. From the way his smile would grow wider and the way his eyes lit up whenever he came to pick up his son on the few occasions he did, anyone could tell he loved and adored his son very much. It was the sort of look you saw on a man that would do simply anything for his child. With his dashing good looks and the air of a mature, responsible working man, Sangyeon was also quite easily sometimes the subject of gossip among the mothers though he did not seem to have noticed it. You didn’t blame them, you too found him deeply attractive. If anything, the years did a good number on him.

You swallowed thickly.

You never told anyone at work about this but you had known Sangyeon back in high school when he was a senior and you, a freshman. Even back then, he had his good looks and was easily one of the most popular boys in school with his exceptional talent in the sport of volleyball and stellar grades. In a way, he felt almost untouchable and so deeply out of reach to everyone besides his own group of friends. That cheerful smile of his would light up any classroom and field he walked into and both the student body and teaching staff alike adored him for him. The boys used to want to hang out with him while the girls used to send him love letters every other day. You on the hand, kept mostly to yourself. With very little friends, life in high school was quiet and uneventful yet you would never forget the way Sangyeon made you feel. He was after all your very first love… As much as you hated to admit it.

You gritted your teeth at the memory. No, it won’t do to bring up past grievances.

All you could be thankful for was that since Sangyeon was a couple years older than you were, it meant that he had graduated earlier than you did. Not seeing his face around school was probably the better part of your high school years. With how busy school was, it wasn’t very long before you found yourself pushing him out of your mind but somehow at the back of your mind, you knew he always did claim a part of your heart for himself… Even as those memories continued to linger as well.

So imagine your shock when you first saw him a little over a year ago at the gates of the kindergarten you worked at. It felt weird seeing him again but at the same time, you could stop the warm, soft feeling of excitement coursing through your veins. It was like clockwork, the same sensations you felt all those years ago coming back - the fast pounding of your heart and the growing heat in your cheeks. Yet right after, there was that sense of dread that came back stronger than ever, sort of like a bad aftertaste. With the good memories, also came the bad memories from back then and just seeing him in the flesh after so many years was enough to break open the dam and allow these memories to come rushing back. Tried as you might to block them out, it wasn’t easy but you managed to keep your personal feelings at bay.

When you found out later that he was divorced, you couldn’t help but feel a jolt of happiness in you which you quickly stifled, shocked at yourself. Somehow it felt wrong to still harbour feelings for him but you tried your best to convince yourself that those were just because of your memories from high school. You probably don’t actually still have feelings for him… Or do you?

Shaking your head, you decided you weren’t going to think about it despite the growing anticipation in your heart as you turned your attention back to little Jeno. It wasn’t like Sangyeon remembered you anyways - He didn’t mention a single thing when the two of you met.

Quickly, you reached into your back pocket and drew out a toffee candy. You always had some at hand, both as a snack and for cheering up the children whenever they were upset. It worked almost instantaneously and you watched as Jeno lit up, his cheeks turning rosier by the second as he smiled brightly at you before grabbing the sweet. Maybe it wasn’t really a good thing, to always cheer your students up with sweets since it could cause cavities but you knew Jeno loved them and he looked so sad that you just couldn’t bear to leave him be.

“Hey, y/n?”

“Yeah?” You turned to Chanhee and immediately frowned when you saw the expression on his face. “What is it?”

Chanhee shuffled uncomfortably on his feet, his hands fiddling with the keys as he cast you a sheepish look. In his other hand, he held his phone and as he waved it awkwardly at you, you could only sigh in resignation.

“Your wife?”

Chanhee’s face grew slightly pink as he scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, his eyes looking everywhere but you.

“Y-yeah… Duty calls. She’s forgotten her keys again so I have to go home and open it for her.”

You peered outside at the darkening sky and little Jeno perched comfortably on the stool, sucking lightly at the toffee sweet in his mouth as he watched with a child-like interest at an ant trailing across the floor. Glancing at the clock, you decided maybe this week’s episode of ‘The Stealer House’ (which was your all time favourite show) could wait. After all, you could always ask for updates from your best friend, Jasmine.

“Alright. Go on, I’ll lock up.” You smiled, extending your hand.

“Thanks, y/n! You’re a lifesaver! Coffee. On me. Tomorrow. I’ll see you!” Chanhee said gratefully, slinging on his messenger bag before making a beeline for his car.

As Chanhee drove off, you and Jeno could only sit and watch as the first drops of the evening rain began to fall upon the earth in soft pattering sounds. You sighed deeply. The rainy season was here. Over the past few weeks, there have been downpours after downpours. At first, they happened on alternate days before it became more and more frequent. It had rained earlier this morning but it seemed as if it might start again any time soon.

A short moment of silence befell as you simply sat next to Jeno, who fiddled with his tiny fingers as his legs dangled above the ground from the stool.

“Well, would you like to do anything before your daddy comes?” You asked good-naturedly, peering down at him.

Jeno turned to look at you, his eyes big and bright.

“More candy!”

You chuckled softly, shaking your head.

“Too much candy isn’t good for you, Jeno. Plus, your daddy will get upset if you get a toothache because of it.”

Jeno pouted, huffing a little as he turned away, swinging his legs.

“I wish I could eat as much candy as I want without getting a toothache.” He murmured petulantly.

“Same, Jeno. Same here.” You smiled before a sharp knock on the door caused the two of you to look up.

Sangyeon was standing outside, absolutely drenched from head to toe, his hair clinging onto his face and neck in wet strands. The white collared office shirt he wore was absolutely soaked and clung on uncomfortably to his skin, the rainwater still dripping from the ends of his hair and clothes. His hand which held his briefcase was shaking and you could see his chest heaving up and down as he trembled ever so slightly from the cold.

“I’m… I’m here.” He panted, his voice shaking as the chilly wind bit harshly through his freezing skin and into his bones.

“Oh my god!” You exclaimed, eyes wide with alarm as you rushed over and immediately opened the door. Upon entering, Sangyeon collapsed in the tiny stool which was sitting by the door, the wooden material creaking slightly under his full weight. His face was pale and you could tell that he had ran the entire way here under the unforgiving, violent storm outside. Quickly, you hurried into the locker room, throwing open the towel cupboards. Frowning, you rummaged through the piles of fabric until you found one large enough for him. Rushing back, you handed Sangyeon the towel, which he accepted gratefully through chattering teeth. Amidst the commotion, Jeno could only sit and stare blankly at his father.

“D- Daddy?” He said, confusion in his expression. Jeno had never seen his father in such a bad state before even when he was really sick so this was all very worrying for the little boy.

“Hey, l- l- little guy. Sorry… Daddy… W- was a little l-l- late.” Sangyeon stuttered, still reeling from the cold but trying to keep up a strong front as he plastered on a weak smile.

“Do you need something hot to drink?” You asked, concerned. Your heart skipped a beat as Sangyeon looked up at you, his eyes dark yet unintentionally intense. He smiled softly at you despite the cold that racked his body.

“T-That will n-not be necessary. I j-j- just need to s-sit for a m-moment,” he said before continuing, “D- Do you mind?”

“No, I don’t. Please take all the time you need. The storm out there is insane, I’m sorry you had to go through that. I noticed you didn’t drive over today?”

Sangyeon shook his head, looking down.

“Some people borrowed our car! Daddy said they will return it to us soon.” Jeno piped up, a huge smile on his face as though announcing an exciting piece of news. “They had a really cool robot like a fishing rod-”

“Jeno!” Sangyeon scolded and the colour on his cheek returned. Jeno stopped mid sentence, his face crumpling ever so slightly. You looked on, flustered.

“It’s fine! I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked. I um… I’ll get you a mug of hot tea anyways, it helps with the cold.” You said, waving your hands in front of you frantically before running off to the kitchen.

As you waited for the kettle to reach a boil, you found your mind drifting to what happened earlier. Did their car get towed? Why? Sangyeon didn’t seem too happy when Jeno mentioned it… Was it because they could no longer afford it? The loud squeaking of the kettle shook you from your reverie and you hurriedly prepared the tea.

“Thanks.” Sangyeon mumbled, receiving the mug with both hands. He looked considerably better than he did earlier, having stopped shivering and the colour returning to his face and hands. You couldn’t help but realise how large his hands were as you handed him the mug of hot tea and when his finger lightly grazed against yours, you almost withdrew instantly which would have sent the mug crashing. Handing Jeno a small packet of banana milk, you sat opposite the father-son duo and stared out at the rain which hadn’t eased up at all. At this rate, neither of you would be able to go home. The wind outside was so strong that the trees looked dangerously close to snapping and the number of times a flash of lightning zapped across the sky was terrifying.

You turned to look at the clock.

7:06pm.

Usually, you would have been on the way home if not for the rain. You were so transfixed at the clock that you failed to notice Sangyeon staring at you.

“Do you have to be somewhere?”

You jumped, looking a little frazzled, not expecting him to strike up a conversation at all.

“Um, no. I don’t.” You forced a smile despite your nerves which were kicking in.

“Oh.” He said quietly as he took another tentative sip of his tea.

“How’s the tea?” You smiled, lacing your fingers together. The awkwardness in the room was almost suffocating and you would have given anything to get yourself out of this situation. It didn’t help that you found the man sitting across from you so deeply and hauntingly attractive even if he looked as if he just went through some sort of hell with his scruffy appearance. The all too familiar melty sensation from high school was coming back and you had to hold yourself back from relieving those teenage girl tendencies.

Get a grip, y/n.

“It’s pretty good. You make really nice tea.” He smiled, his eyes crinkling into crescents and you felt your chest tighten.

“Doesn’t look like the rain is going to stop soon.”

The carpark lot outside was practically mildly flooded with rainwater while dark clouds continued to loom over the earth outside. It would be impossible to venture outside without getting completely soaked even if one had an umbrella or raincoat on. The nearest bus stop and subway station was about a good 20 minute walk away and that was on an ordinary day. With the rain outside coming down so relentlessly, it would likely take more than 45 minutes.

“Yeah… If only I had a car.” You said, only to immediately regret it. Sangyeon’s eyes darkened and he sank into his seat.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

“It’s fine, please don’t apologise.” He replied in a kind manner, though he wouldn't meet your eyes out of embarrassment. “We… Couldn’t afford it anymore. You know… The um, road taxes are getting pricier and pricier. If only I still had the car, I could have sent you home. Instead, you’re stuck here with me and Jeno. I’m sorry for coming so late, I should have planned my time better...”

“Ah, please do not apologise! It’s ok, I understand it completely!” You spluttered, feeling anxious. It was odd to see him so down and come to think of it, it was probably the most emotion and actual conversation you had gotten out of him since the first time you’d seen him again here at the kindergarten. Even then, it wasn’t the kind of emotion or type of conversation you had envisioned having with him and you disliked seeing him like this. In a way, it also struck you that the Sangyeon that was sitting in front of you was different from the one you knew back in high school.

The Sangyeon now seemed much more guarded, defensive yet weirdly… Mature. It was like he grew up and experienced so much more of adulthood than most would at his age. At 28, many guys his age would still be enjoying the remaining years of their supposed youthful years - going to clubs, travelling with friends and going on dating sprees. Yet here he was, having married young, had a son and then divorced all before he even hit 30. It was definitely surprising to know that this was the very same guy that everyone in high school thought had it all going for him. As the school’s star volleyball player and captain of the school team when you both were still students, most were willing to bet that he would be signed by a major sports league of sorts but it never happened. Instead, he went to university to study accountancy and met his now ex-wife which he had clearly divorced. The Sangyeon in high school was exuberant, outgoing and full of life. You distinctively remembered how the two of you had crossed paths the very first time in school.

“Can’t we just go another time?” You whined to your best friend, Jasmine who dragged you by the wrist down the corridor.

Swivelling around to look at you with an indignant expression on her face, Jasmine rolled her eyes before smirking. Her hair flowed gracefully behind her as the two of you glided down the hallways, much to the confusion of some who watched the two of you pass.

“Nope. You won’t regret this, trust me.” She winked.

“What about volleyball could possibly be more interesting than watching my favourite twitch streamers play Minecraft and Pokémon, the two greatest games ever created?”

Jasmine stopped short, her mouth hanging open.

“You can’t be serious.”

“I am.” You replied huffily. “If you don’t mind, I’m going back to my laptop.”

“Oh no, you’re not. You’re a teenage girl. It’s not everyday you get to live your teenage years so you’re coming with me!” She snapped, grabbing you and running down the stairs. You tried to keep pace with her, your feet moving quickly in line with hers so you wouldn’t fall and break your neck or something. Sometimes, you forgot how unfit you were as you struggled to catch your breath. Maybe it was time to stop bingeing YouTube and those delicious chocolate bars you have stashed under your bed so your mother wouldn’t find them.

As you guys entered the volleyball court, you could see crowds of students from all grades cheering from the bleachers, some with banners in their hands and others with inflatable plastic sticks and their phones to document the ongoing match. It was the start of the sports season in schools and on this particular afternoon, the volleyball team was supposed to have their very first preliminary match against another school from downtown. The atmosphere was chaotic with the sound screaming and cheering almost deafening you. The thumping of trainers against the waxed wooden floor was irritating your ears and the huge scoreboard on the wall above felt intimidating with its large flashing red numbers counting down the match. The players in the court were so involved in their game that not once did any of them look up to check the timing, their eyes all firmly trained on the ball as they hurried to serve. Nobody seemed to notice you and Jasmine either as the two of you took your places at the side of bleachers.

Everything was moving so quickly that you didn’t even know what was going on exactly. To be honest, you didn’t have a clue which team you were supposed to root for either. Are the guys wearing the white jersey shirts the ones from the school’s volleyball team? Or was it the ones in red and black? It was all very confusing. Nevertheless, it took almost no time for you to get bored out of your mind. Your head was pounding from the loud noises that surrounded you and you wanted so desperately to go back to the tranquility of your homeroom. You didn’t understand volleyball either which meant that nothing really made sense to you.

Looking at Jasmine, you could see that she was engrossed in the game. Following her eyes, you held back a chuckle at you realised who she had her sights on. Of course, it was Younghoon. You must have heard her gush over the volleyball team’s vice captain over a million times by now. Even as someone who abhorred sports and never kept up with the sports news in school, you knew Younghoon simply because of how many times she had talked about him. You could understand why she would though. There was no denying that he was an attractive guy, with shiny raven hair and a firm stance that exuded coolness. However, you had other things on your mind. Like Minecraft… And Pokémon.

Quietly, you inched away, careful not to alert her. You were so close to the double doors when you suddenly felt an ominous feeling strike you. It took you a split second to turn around and see a ball hurtling towards you at about a million miles per hour.

THUMP!

You felt yourself fall down onto the floor, your head throbbing. Your vision was blurring up and you could feel the dizziness set in as the court gasped collectively. You felt your cheeks heating up. How embarrassing! You could vaguely hear a woman (most likely a medic) ask you how you were feeling but you couldn’t get yourself to focus. All you wanted to do was get up and remove yourself from this humiliating situation.

“I am so sorry, are you okay?”

Suddenly, you became briefly aware of a strong, rough hand gripping onto your forearm firmly but gently. The touch felt soothing and it sent a jolt of electricity down your spine and immediately you snapped your head to look up at the owner of the voice. What you saw, made the words at the back of your throat hitch.

Never in your life have you ever come face to face with such a handsome face. His coffee brown hair cascaded in soft locks over his dark eyes and as he knelt down to help you, you felt your breath hitch. Was it even possible for a guy’s lips to look that… Soft? The red and black jersey fit him perfectly and the sleeveless cutting brought out the muscle definition of his arms and you could feel yourself getting shy. It wasn’t long before mortification set in. You must look like a complete idiot in front of him!

Instantly, you reeled back as if burned, withdrawing your hand away from him. He stiffened, his eyes widening in surprise. The medic tutted, shaking her head at Sangyeon.

“She needs space. I’ll take care of her, you go and play your match, be more careful while you’re at it!” She snapped and Sangyeon took a tentative step back, a sheepish expression on his face and uncertainty in those dark eyes. You could sense the hesitation as he debilitated whether to help or not.

“Hey, Lee Sangyeon! Get back in there! The girl will be fine!” A portly man screamed at him from the sidelines, most likely his coach.

“Sangyeon.” You mumbled his name under his breath. You had heard his name only in passing, sometimes Jasmine would go on about the volleyball team and at times, you’d heard her mention that very name. This guy was the volleyball team’s captain?

Sangyeon turned back to you, an uncomfortable look on his face as he mouthed the words ‘I’m sorry’ before bolting back into the court and to his teammates who patted him reassuringly on the back and casted you looks of guilt.

“Oh my god, y/n! Are you feeling alright?” Jasmine hurried over, her brows furrowing together with worry.

“Y-yeah… I’m good.” You could only reply dumbly, your sights still fixed on the boy who had most certainly captured your heart for his own.

Ever since that day, you remembered how you would always run down to the volleyball court with Jasmine even without her asking. It was real funny how just a single gaze could have you so smitten with someone. When you did see him playing, you would try to make yourself comfortable at the bleachers, trying not to look too conspicuous. In the hallways, you would run the other way whenever you saw him but peek around the corner just to catch a glimpse. It was all a very new feeling to you, the exhilaration and nervousness you would feel whenever you saw him around school. Sure, you still loved Minecraft and Pokémon but there was something about Sangyeon that made you feel some type of way. It was like the warm feeling in your chest you’d get on a cold, winter morning when you sit by a fireplace with a mug of hot chocolate in your hands. It was like the feeling of momentary happiness you would get when you win a prize at the claw machine. It was like the slight tingle you would get when you experience static.

It was your first love.

Maybe it was love at first sight then. Cupid had finally pulled its arrow on you. Suddenly, it seemed as though everything about Sangyeon was interesting to you. You would perk up whenever you heard his name in a conversation and when you saw him, you couldn’t even hide the bashfulness in your expression. Smart and caring, he was perfect. Many people seemed to have thought the same, what with his insane popularity in school. He was always surrounded by people that it made it difficult for people like you to even get close or attempt to befriend him.

“...Y/n? Are you alright?”

You snapped out of your thoughts as Sangyeon waved a hand in front of you, trying to get your attention.

“Sorry! What were you saying?” You asked, embarrassed at having gone off on a daze like that. Sangyeon regarded you with curiosity, a little unsure of what to make of you.

“Um, nothing much. You just stared off into space.” He said slowly. Beside him, Jeno was fast asleep with his mouth slightly ajar and a bit of drool leaking from his lips to his shirt.

“Oh, he’s asleep!”

Hurriedly, you took off the cardigan you were wearing and placed it gently over the boy’s sleeping form. There was an unexplainable look in Sangyeon’s eyes as you did but he remained silent.

“I… Sorry, I guess I’ve just been thinking about some stuff.” You smiled, feeling the nerves kicking in. Sangyeon raised an eyebrow, holding the hot mug of tea closer to himself. The rain outside was still as violent as ever and it didn’t look as if it would be easing up anytime soon. A beam tugged at the corner of his lips.

“Well, would you like to talk about it?”

Looking at that smile that made your heart flutter, it was almost laughable how he had almost no idea the effect he was having on you. Quite honestly, you surprised yourself with all these emotions that were now bubbling up once again. In a way, you didn’t think you still had it in you but your crush on Sangyeon even from all those years ago must have had a huge impact on you. Your heart was picking up its pace and if you weren’t careful, he might be able to hear it. Sensing your apprehension, his smile dropped.

“Sorry, I must have crossed the line. I was just trying to make conversation.”

“Ah, no. You haven’t. I just… It’s something very personal to me.” You mumbled under your breath and Sangyeon nodded weakly.

“I understand.”

At that moment, he let out a large sneeze and very nearly tipped the tea he had in the mug. His nose was becoming redder by the minute and it was clear that he was close to catching a cold.

“Are you alright?” You asked, reaching forward and placing a hand on his shoulder.

Sangyeon waved his hand, looking slightly embarrassed.

“I’ll be fine.”

It was at that moment the both of you became aware of your hand on his shoulder and just how close your proximity was. Your hair was just brushing against his face and your lips were mere inches away. His eyes seemed to hold entire galaxies, bright and luminous as they were, especially so under the dim lighting while the storm raged outside.

Quickly, you leaped back and he cleared his throat awkwardly, his eyes looking everywhere but you. You could feel the heat rapidly rising up to your cheeks and you could feel your words getting stuck at the back of your throat, unsure of what to say. That was when you noticed that the office shirt Sangyeon was wearing was still sticking uncomfortably to him, the wet and cold fabric causing him to shiver ever so slightly. You briefly remembered Chanhee stocking up some extra shirts, towels and slacks for the staff just the other day when a painting class went out of hand.

‘For convenience’s sake’, he had said when questioned. At that time, you had laughed at him for being too cautious and overreacting. To think they could actually come in handy now was extremely ironic, though it might not have been for the situation you had in mind.

“We have some extra shirts and pants in the storeroom if you need. The shower is just right there.” You said softly, still feeling a little rattled from what happened earlier.

Snapping his head up, Sangyeon wrinkled his nose.

“You have extra shirts and pants here? Of my size?”

“Um yeah, one of the teachers thought to buy some cheap ones when we had an unfortunate painting incident the other day. We had a bit of a paint fight in the nursery classroom,” you said, laughing a little just at the memory of what happened.

Sangyeon smiled warmly, the amusement shining in his eyes.

“That must have been some paint fight.”

“It was!” You bobbed your head up and down. “Wild.”

“You sure it’s not a problem for me to just use the shower?” He asked, a little hesitant.

“Not at all!”

As he stood up, you couldn’t help but notice that he towered over you. Sure, he had always towered over you but it still felt so nerve wracking to have him standing before you like that with his wet hair slicked back and the white shirt clinging onto his body. You tried to keep your sights trained firmly on the ground, trying your best not to look as you led the way. The feeling of him just trailing behind you sent shivers down your spine that had nothing to do with the cold. Yet somehow despite the fact that it got your heart doing some pretty intense backflips, his presence was also weirdly... comforting.

The tantalising aroma of convenience store fried chicken and corn dogs hung in the air as you stepped in, pulling the hood of your jacket furtively over your head, your eyes scanning the area. The snacks were displayed beautifully on the metal racks and the frosty machine whirred softly in the background over the melody of the then trending pop song played on the radio but you had no eyes for it. Pulling your jacket over your body to conceal your uniform, the tension in you only dissipated when you found no one but the bored cashier standing by the cash register who was too busy filing her nails to even care that you stepped in.

Had you found a teacher in here, you would have been toast. Walking idly down the racks of delectable snacks, you could barely hide your glee as you took in the vast variety of junk food in front of you. Barbeque chips, white chocolate biscuits, animal shaped gummy candies… It was heaven on earth. You scrunched up your nose as you thought of the standard fare probably being served back at the school canteen. No doubt, it was probably the same old stale carbonara pasta and salad made from withered up lettuce and soft tomatoes. Just the thought of it was enough to strike disgust in your heart. Rounding the corner, you almost jumped at the sight of a group of boys seated at the far corner of the store. It took you about a second to realise that they weren’t teachers but rather fellow rulebreakers from school and relaxed.

It must be nice to have a group of friends to do such lawless things together. Jasmine would always chastise you for leaving, refusing to come with you. Easy for her to say, she always had such beautiful packed lunches from home. You, on the other, had only your own allowance to rely on and there was no way you were going to spend it on the food offered in the school’s cafeteria.

You were so engrossed in the selection of snacks before you that you failed to even notice the overlooming dark clouds outside and the light, methodic pattering sound of tiny raindrops against the glass windows. As you stood before a choice of either a ham and cheese sandwich or turkey sandwich, you wondered if you brought enough money. Whipping out your purse, you did a quick check only to cry out.

Pouring out a few pennies onto your palm, you could feel your heart crumpling. How could you have forgotten to bring money of all things? Your stomach growled audibly and you whimpered, feeling like you were about to cry. Grazing your fingers over the wrapped sandwiches longingly, you started to make your way out of the store, dragging your feet as you did. Looks like it’s back to measly school meals.

Yet as you opened the door only to be greeted by a now heavy downpour, the urge to curse out loud had never been stronger. You had completely forgotten that it was now the rainy season. Now, you were not only going to be hungry but also cold at the same time. How did things turn out so badly? Turning back to look at the cashier who didn’t even glance up, you decided there was no right way about it. Your choices were either to brave the rain or be late for classes.

As you stood despondently staring at the rain and reflecting on your life choices, the group of boys from earlier stumbled out of the store, laughing as they did.

“I’ve honestly never seen him like that!”

“It’s definitely something new. Oh hey, it’s raining guys.”

“Wow, it happened so suddenly though. Just a moment ago, it was fine.”

Glancing at them, you felt yourself subconsciously inching away. You never were very good with people, especially boys. To say it felt awkward was an understatement. It was embarrassing as well, knowing that you’ve made an empty trip and got caught in the rain. There was no way they’d know what happened but it didn’t stop you from feeling self conscious about it.

“Well, I think I’m gonna make a run for it! Last one back to school pays for lunch tomorrow!” One of them called out, dashing out into the rain.

“Hak, what the fuck!” Another yelled before the rest of them set off, their shoes splashing against puddles as they did. Some of the rainwater splashed over onto your own shoes and you gritted your teeth but said nothing.

There was the tinkling sound of the convenience store’s door charm as the door swung open.

“Hey guys, I- Oh, hell no. They did not just do that to me.” Someone said breathlessly from behind you.

You froze. That voice…

Turning around slowly, you found yourself staring at the one and only, Lee Sangyeon. Instantly, your cheeks began to burn and your heartbeat began to pick up its pace. Of all places and of all people, why him?! Looking away quickly, you tried to calm yourself down. It’s a mere coincidence, maybe if you don’t say anything he won’t-

“Um, hello?”

This cannot be happening.

You swivelled around to look at him as you tried to calm your beating heart and as you did, you could feel that warm feeling you felt ever so often whenever you saw him around school despite your nervousness. With him just right in front of you, it all felt extremely nerve wracking. What do you even say?

“H-Hi?”

“Did you happen to see a group of guys out here?”

“I…” You thought of what had happened earlier. “Um, yeah. They just left though…”

Sangyeon sighed, looking resigned. Keeping his head down, you thought you saw a tint of pinkness in his cheeks before he snapped his head up, his hands planted firmly on his hips as he stared at the torrential downpour. Shooting him furtive glances, you noticed that he had nothing on him either.

“Do you not have an umbrella too?” You asked tentatively.

“...Yeah, I don’t.” He said sheepishly. There was a moment of brief silence where neither of you uttered a single word. Checking his watch, Sangyeon clicked his tongue.

“What is it?”

“It’s 1:15pm, time’s almost up.” He replied, holding up his wrist to show you the time. The butterflies in your stomach disappeared instantly only to be replaced by an uncomfortable gut wrenching feeling instead. You couldn’t afford to be late! You have a math quiz right after lunch! You were already barely scraping by Mr Moon’s class and if you flunk or god forbid, miss the test entirely, it would be a guaranteed fail for the class which would mean that you would have to retake it next semester.

Sangyeon must have noticed the sickly palour on your face and the sheer fear in your eyes because his voice had taken on a gentle tone as he asked, “Do you have something urgent to get to?”

Nothing could have hidden the anxiety and shakiness in your voice as you replied, “I have a math quiz at 1:30pm.”

For a moment, Sangyeon didn’t say anything. Then, he took off the jacket he was wearing and in an instance, he had draped the jacket over your head. Surprised, you looked up at him. He wore a warm smile on his face as he said, “Ready to run when you are.”

“But..! You-”

“I’ll be fine.” He stared out at the pouring rain. “Well, a little rain won’t hurt.”

You could have thought of about a billion different ways to reject him but the fear over missing your math quiz quickly overwhelmed all those thoughts and you had no choice but to dumbly agree. You didn’t like inconveniencing people, especially not Sangyeon but there just wasn’t any good way to turn him down, not when he was looking at you so kindly and so expectantly at that. Sangyeon must have sensed your hesitation because he shot you a reassuring look.

“I’ll be fine.” He reiterated, smiling.

You didn’t say anything but you could feel a sense of warmth growing in your heart despite the cold outside. Somehow, his voice had a calming effect on you and you began to break into a run. He followed suit, the both of you dashing out into the rain with you shielded under his jacket.

While the two of you ran, you couldn’t help but sneak a few looks at him, feeling the butterflies in your stomach flutter more whenever you did. His side profile highlighted his strong, handsome features and the shadows brought out the definition of jawline and darkness of his eyes. The rainwater gave his skin an almost shining look, water droplets dripping from the tips of his fringe. The water had seeped through the white material of his uniform and the fabric stuck his skin, bringing out his athletic shape. He looked almost as handsome as he did the first time you saw him, that one memorable moment despite the hard hit on your head.

As you stared, he suddenly turned to look at you and for a split second, the two of you made eye contact before you turned away rapidly, your cheeks burning. Why is it that you feel so warm even when it was freezing? Your heart felt like it was about to burst and for a moment, you wondered if he could tell you had feelings for him. Did he remember you? He must have. You don’t just give your jacket to someone… Right? Perhaps it was his way of apologising for the hit though to be quite honest, having him talk to you seemed like enough already. You never were very lucky in love or around your crushes and many times, you would have never exchanged even a single word with your crush out of shyness and fear. This was probably the furthest you’ve ever gotten with someone you liked.

As the two of you finally stepped into the school lobby, Sangyeon was soaked through, the water droplets still dripping down the side of his face. Shaking his head to get the water out, he ran a hand through his hair and you tried not to look. He shot you a grin which you returned.

“Hey, it’s only 1:24pm. We made it.”

“We did, thank you so much for that.” You thanked him shyly to which he brushed off, chuckling.

“It’s alright. No problem at all.”

‘I… I guess I’ll get going?”

“Ah, alright. I’ll see you, y/n.” He smiled before he gasped, suddenly remembering something as he ruffled through his pockets. Drawing out a chocolate bar, he handed it to you. You stared at his outstretched hand, confused.

“Take it.”

“Why?”

“I saw- I have an extra one and I’m not exactly allowed to eat chocolate right now because of competition season. I thought you might want it?”

When you didn’t say anything, he continued quickly, “I mean, that is if you want it of course.”

You could feel your stomach growling just looking at that sweet, heavenly bar of chocolatey goodness and it suddenly came to you that you have not had lunch. Normally, you would have flat out rejected an offer like that but the way he was looking at you with those kindly eyes made you think twice. There was no way you could say no to Sangyeon.

“Thank you.” You mumbled, taking the chocolate bar from him and his smile widened.

“By the way, I-”

Before he could say another word, the same group of boys who you had identified to be his friends came from behind the lockers several aisles down. Some of them were laughing as one of them slapped him across the back. They seem

“You’re finally back!” An upperclassmen you recognised as the school’s baseball team’s pitcher, Changmin said, patting him on the back. “See, guys? I told you guys he’s going to go for it. He’s not as big as a coward you guys think he is!”

“Fine, fine. Take your bet.” Another who you knew was referred to earlier as ‘Hak’, grumbling and slapping a wad of notes into Changmin’s hand.

“Didn’t think you’d actually do that, Sangyeon. I should have bet that she wouldn’t accept-” A red-haired friend of his stopped mid sentence, his face palling as the group began to notice that you were still standing there. The rest of the group seemed to have noticed at the same time Sangyeon’s face had turned properly red by now and his lips were moving but you couldn’t hear a single word he was saying. The shame of it all was blocking out everything and your face was growing hotter and hotter by the second until you felt almost positive that you could explode. Biting so hard on your lower lips that you were almost sure you were going to bleed, you shied away as he took a tentative step forward.

“Y/n, please…” He reached out to hold your hand but you shrugged it away, keeping your head down and trying to keep your breathing steady.

“Please. Please don’t.” You choked out, taking another step back like a wounded child. Quickly, you turned and bolted out of the lobby and into the corridors. The chocolate bar you had in your hand dropped to the floor with clatter against the linoleum floor and you didn’t even care to see if it broke into fragments just like your heart just did.

As you ran along the noisy walkways where students were chattering among themselves and enjoying the last minutes of their lunch break, you couldn’t help but keep your head down, your thoughts lingering on what happened earlier.

The shame. The humiliation. It was all too much.

Sprinting into the restroom and locking yourself in the cubicle, you had to take a moment to just breathe. Did that really just happen? How could you have been so gullible? You should have known that that was too good to be true - who would have been that nice? You almost wanted to laugh out loud at yourself just like those guys are probably doing now. God, you were such a fool. It was over before it even began.

Sniffling, your vision was beginning to get blurry from all the tears and softly, you whispered, “Lee Sangyeon, I’ll never forgive you.”

Since that day, you would avoid Sangyeon whenever you saw him around. No matter how far he was, just the slight indication of his presence was enough to send you running off in the opposite direction. It was difficult to say the least, to avoid someone within such a small neighbourhood high school. You would hide behind Jasmine or bolt off to the nearest restroom whenever you saw him walking towards you and after a while, she got the message as well, assisting in your escape attempts all the way till Sangyeon’s graduation. The last time you ever saw him was up on that stage with that warm, kind smile of his receiving his graduation certificate up until this year when you met him again when he came to pick up his son, Jeno.

“Hey, you okay?”

You blinked, shaking yourself out of your thoughts and looked up to see Sangyeon staring down at you. His hand was planted against the door frame of the shower making his build seem so much larger, with the other hand outstretched and it took you a moment to realise that he was waiting for you to hand him a spare shirt you had in your hands. Outside, the rain was still pouring down on the earth. The light above had begun to flicker and the room was growing dimmer by the second, the only source of light coming from the moonlight, the flashes of lightning and the dying light source from the ceiling.

Looking at his outstretched hand somehow triggered memories from the past and despite your determination to keep the past in the past, the bitter feelings still resurfaced and with it, it brought anger and frustration. You were no longer the meek girl you were in high school, you were stronger than this. While you fought these feelings that threatened to take control, Sangyeon peered down at you with concern, sensing that something was wrong.

“Y/n?”

The sound of his voice calling your name was just about enough to tip you over the edge.

“Why did you do it?”

You could see the flicker of shock that crossed his face, having been caught off guard at your question. It took you about a second to realise what you had just said. Covering your mouth, you stared at him with wide eyes. You could have kicked yourself. How did you let your feelings get the best of you? He probably doesn’t even remember and you might have just made a fool out of yourself. Again.

For a moment, Sangyeon said nothing and the only sound that broke the silence was the sound of the storm outside.

“It was a misunderstanding.”

You were not expecting a reply. Taken aback, you could only look at him, speechless. The words were stuck in the back of your throat and your palms were beginning to get calmy. It felt like you were being transported back to that very moment in high school.

“You remember?”

Sangyeon’s eyes were full of regret as he whispered, “Yes. Yes, I do.”

Sangyeon couldn’t help but let his eyes drift back to you throughout the remainder of the game.

It was getting increasingly difficult to focus on the game and although he knew how badly the team needed to clinch this victory, he couldn’t help but keep looking out for you.

Were you all better? Did the ball hit you too hard?

These were the sort of questions that floated around in his mind as the match went on and every so often, he’d turn to check if you were still there and every time he looked, you would be watching and just the thought of you having your eye on him was enough to give him the boost he needed to perform his best.

It was weird. He barely ever felt this way around anyone else. The many girls that have come forth professing their crushes on him never even came near and here he was being completely smitten by a certain someone. My, how the tables have turned. There was just something about you that simply… Struck him. Your beauty to him was astounding in a very heartwarming and comfortable way. It was like one of those moments when you meet someone and you just knew that you liked them.

It was as if he had fallen under the spell of Cupid. The captain who had never had a crush and always prioritised volleyball and studies was now seen keeping a conscious lookout for the girl who had captured his attention for herself with just a mere gaze. He would look out for you during recess, around school and sometimes during practice when he knew admirers of the volleyball team would come to watch. His heart always soared whenever he did catch a glimpse of you. It was funny how he normally had no problem talking to people but when it came to you, he was as shy as a mouse.

Sangyeon’s friends had caught on relatively quickly, jumping on the rare opportunity to tease the no nonsense, studious volleyball team captain about his little crush on you. Many times unbeknownst to you, his friends would drop a few hints here and there, implying at his supposed crush on you. It was definitely unsettling and embarrassing to say the least but he did not dare jump in for fear of exposing his secret - the fact that he did in fact fancy you.

“Guys, are you actually kidding me right now?” Sangyeon asked, simply radiating with what felt like an intense mixture of anger, frustration, disappointment and dejection. Watching that expression of dismay and sadness on your face did terrible things to his heart, akin to someone pushing a dagger into it and twisting the blade. Part of him did not want to believe that had actually just happened before his very eyes but the sight of the broken chocolate bar on the floor confirmed his worst fears that this was indeed the reality.

When he saw you in the convenience store, it took everything in him not to act like a lovestruck teenager. He tried his best not to pay you any attention but it was practically impossible. It was like whenever he turned away, there was this irrepressible urge to turn back and he just didn’t seem to be able to keep his eyes off you. It was embarrassing to say the least, even more so when his friends caught on.

“Are you ever going to talk to her?” Juyeon asked, rolling his eyes.

“... What do I even say to her? I want to talk but I don’t want to look stupid.”

“Since when have you ever?” Haknyeon chipped in.

“Hey, she’s leaving.” Changmin said suddenly and quickly, Sangyeon turned. “Did she not get anything?”

“I saw her looking into her wallet earlier and I think she probably didn’t have enough money.”

“Is she really skipping lunch?” Sangyeon thought, frowning. Imagine making the effort to sneak out the school and then not having enough money to buy a filling lunch. As the group began to clear up, he stared at the row of chocolate bars on display on a nearby rack. Was this going to his chance? As he stood pondering, Changmin nudged the others. Instantly, they exchanged a knowing look.

“Hey, Sangyeon. We’ll be going out to take a stretch, can you help to clear the rest?” Haknyeon asked.

“Wha-? I uh, yeah sure.” He waved them away without a second thought. Do girls like chocolates for lunch? It’s definitely not your conventional lunch option but he had read somewhere that gifting someone chocolates was romantic and girls liked them as gifts. Sangyeon had zero experience in such things so all he could do was trust the advice he’d read online.

It had taken everything in him to not freak out when he found that his friends had left him alone with you but almost as soon as he talked to you, he couldn’t be more grateful. This was his one opportunity. He didn’t know if you remembered him but he didn’t care. All that mattered was this moment. His heart fluttered and it felt like he was on edge, fearful of making a fool out of himself. He didn’t even think twice about shielding you from the rain. Sangyeon was never one to tolerate the cold very well but for you, he felt more than willing. As the two of you ran, he had been extremely conscious of himself. Were you well shielded? Was the pace of running okay for you? Could you… Hear his heart pounding?

This was not how he envisioned things to go. Just when he thought he finally had a chance, it was ripped away from him. Weeks. For weeks, he had been confronting his own confusing feelings for you. For someone who always knew what he needed to do and what his goals were in everything he did, his feelings surrounding you were the one thing he was never able to comprehend. In a way, you were an enigma he struggled to figure out. Feelings were always a complicated thing to dissect but especially when they came to you. Was this how the people who confessed to him felt when he rejected them? Sangyeon had never thought too deeply into how they might have felt - all he knew was that rejection was supposed to be a natural part of life. He never thought himself as someone who feared rejection yet this time, it was the one thing he dreaded. Rejection would have been terrible but what was even worse was the fact that you were hurt… By him. He had destroyed his own chances once and for all.

The urge to lash out at his friends was strong - he wanted to yell and go off but he knew deep down it was all a misunderstanding and a terribly unlucky case of ‘wrong time, wrong place’.

“We… We are really sorry, Sangyeon.” Changmin apologised quietly, not even daring to look him in the eye.

“Please forgive us.” Haknyeon added, his voice full of remorse and guilt.

Taking a deep breath, Sangyeon closed his eyes and tried to ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach. He couldn’t possibly blame them. He knew they meant well.

“It’s okay. I’ll try to… Fix this.”

Except he couldn’t. Whenever he came close, you would run off in the opposite direction as if you’d just seen the devil himself. There was no way of coming close to talking to you. His friends had tried to come close but you pushed them away as well. You no longer came by to watch his matches and the growing guilt and sadness had a profound impact on his performances. He didn’t feel like he played as well as he did when you were around. In a way, you were the Daphne to his Apollo. You were the one person he couldn’t have and it pained him. Knowing that you were hurt as a result of his own actions pained him even more. Eventually, he knew he had to give up and as graduation drew near, Sangyeon kept his heart and feelings locked away. He was more invested in his studies and games but none of it felt like it really mattered. He was doing it for the sake of doing it.

Even as he went onto university, it felt tortuous to carry with him the knowledge that he had hurt someone he genuinely never meant to hurt. It might seem childish in hindsight but perhaps… That might have been first love that never was. Many nights, Sangyeon tried to push you out of his mind, trying so hard to convince himself that his feelings were merely fleeting but deep down, he knew they weren’t. Yet as time went on, he began to gradually lock away his memories and even found someone who he married thought as much as he’d never admit it, that strong feeling of comfort, warmth and joy he felt around you was just never there. It wasn’t really any surprise that he had gotten divorced barely a year into the marriage. Communication between him and Mina broke down completely, with regular verbal fights almost every other night. He no longer saw things the same way she did and they disagreed on virtually everything. The screaming, yelling and crying just wouldn’t stop. It was a relationship that drained him both emotionally and mentally. Many nights, he would fall asleep on the couch and wake up with intense back aches that only worsened as he carried around a heavy backpack to work every other day. The two of them went from being best friends and a couple to being almost completely strangers in their own home. Eventually, Mina had barely spared a second thought before packing up her bags and leaving him with a barely 3 month old toddler. It was definitely a union he regretted but the one thing he never did regret was his son, Jeno.

Jeno was the one constant in his life. For a long time, it was just the two of them while he struggled to make ends meet as an accountant for a small paper supply company. Life was average to say the least, it wasn’t fantastic but it wasn’t bad either. He was living in a different part of the country with his son and a small, secure studio apartment. There was nothing out of place and everything was on track. Though, the good times wouldn’t last. When his company went bust, it felt like everything was collapsing right before his very eyes again only this time, it was worse. He had a 3 year old son with him and was unemployed with the threat of eviction trailing closely behind them, breathing down his neck. It felt like the walls were closing in fast around him, leaving them both no room to breathe. He would have been left homeless if not for his friends and connections.

It was a blessing truly when Juyeon hooked him up with an accountant job with a medical supply company. The only problem was the fact that he would have to move back to the very town he had attended high school in, the very period of his life when he had suffered his first heartbreak. As he packed up his bags on his very last night in the city, he wondered briefly if you were still there.

Sangyeon sat at the edge of the bed, looking at the packed suitcases that sat at his feet. Beside him, Jeno was fast asleep. Softly, he ran his fingers through his son’s hair and he smiled. Did it really matter? Even if you were still there, things weren’t like how they were back then when he actually still had a chance of salvaging things. He never did get to know how you really felt about him but he was almost certain that you might still hate him. Maybe you might have forgotten or maybe you might have even moved away. For some reasons as much as Sangyeon didn’t want to confront his past again, he still felt his heart sink at the prospect of not seeing you again when he went back. He never did acknowledge it but you had always claimed a part of his heart for yourself all these years. Even as he alighted from the plane back at his old hometown, Sangyeon had very little expectations.

He never expected much but the shock that hit him was still almost numbing when he first showed up at Sunny Hearts Kindergarten with Jeno. There you were, in the flesh after almost 10 years. You were still as beautiful as you were in his dreams and although he wanted so desperately to talk to you, he knew he should keep his distance. It wouldn’t be right to bring up such memories. He wasn’t sure if you recognised him but he most definitely did. When you looked him in the eye, it took all his power not to do anything stupid. It felt like coming home in a way but to a home he wasn’t familiar with.

“I… I had no idea…” You whispered breathlessly as he told his story.

The room was dark, the power supply having malfunctioned, leaving the two of you in the dark. Hearing Sangyeon’s story in that voice you loved so much was surreal and almost even a little overwhelming. It felt like you were knocked out of your wind. For a moment, there was only the sound of the raging storm outside while the two of you sat in bated silence in the locker room. There was a weird yet familiar tension in the air and after a while, you managed to choke out.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Although you couldn’t see Sangyeon’s face, you could hear the softness in his voice.

“You didn’t give me a chance to.”

A flash of lightning zapped across the sky and for a brief moment, you saw the pain in his eyes and it was like something in you clicked. It was the lock you had kept on all those repressed feelings you ever had over the years. Deep down, you knew you had felt the same. You loved him, you loved him so deeply it hurt as did he. The both of you were just two souls in love yet too obstinate and clueless to fight for the love the two of you so deserve. It wasn’t resurfaced feelings - it was feelings that had been locked away for too long, waiting for the right opportunity to be freed and expressed freely.

Sensing the tension, Sangyeon grew flustered, stammering as he did.

“Look, I-I get it if you still don’t-”

His eyes widened as you crashed your lips on his. His soft lips moved slightly against yours as he stiffened. Slowly, he melted into the kiss, his hands coming up to cup your face. Your hearts were beating in unison as the two of you became simply locked in the moment, two long lost lovers locked in a tight embrace. As he withdrew, he whispered, “This. This is what I’ve been yearning for since Day one.”

There was so much affection, love and longing in his voice that it almost made you shy. Bowing your head, he chuckled deeply as he tilted your face up ever so gently with 2 fingers, making you look him in the eye. The moonlight from outside made his eyes seem all the more reflective and it felt like for a moment the two of you were back in that volleyball court, exchanging that very first gaze that led to so much hurt, misunderstandings and repressed feelings over all these years.

Suddenly, the lights flickered back on and you were so surprised, you jumped back. In the bright light, the redness in Sangyeon’s face was all the more apparent and instantly, he cowered back.

“I-I… I’m sorry! I don’t know what came over me…”

“Um…” You bit down on your lower lip, unsure of what to say. You knew you wanted to say something but what exactly do you say to a long lost first love who you just shared an intimate moment with?

“Hey, the rain has stopped.” He remarked, looking out and you had a slight inclination that he was trying to cover his blushing face.

“Yeah, it has.” You said slowly.

“Daddy! Miss y/n! Where are you…!” Jeno’s cries from the lobby resounded through the corridor.

“Oh, he must have woken up!” You cried, getting to your feet and making your way over with Sangyeon following closely behind. There was an almost giddy look in his eyes which you felt your heart tightened at the sight of before you realised, you might be wearing the very same expression.

As you locked up the Kindergarten later, you felt Sangyeon standing just beside you, shuffling his feet as if there was something on his mind. Behind him, Jeno was busy jumping into puddles and you lowered your head, like a shy schoolgirl in love which was honestly how you were feeling.

“Would you… Would you be down to join us for dinner?” Sangyeon asked quietly, peering at you with those eyes that seemed to carry entire galaxies in them.

As you looked at him, it all felt like homecoming. This was what everything came down to. A failed high school first love up until this very moment. The man before you felt both so familiar yet so foreign in the best way possible. There was just so much you wanted to talk to him about. All those years the two of you missed, the lost love that the two you could have had… Thinking about it all almost made you emotional all over again.

Finally. After all these years, you have found it.

“Okay.”

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happyrainbowhotel · 2 years ago

Note

🎵

Technically, I already answered this so, I am going to link it Here .

HOWEVER

I will take this opportunity to answer a similar question on the ask meme: Three Songs That Remind Me of My Muse

Just go listen to my Charlie Vibes playlist on Spodify

Bluebird - Miranda Lambert

This song primarily reminds me of Charlie because it reminds me of her very optimistic attitude. She is the type to take anything bad in her life (or someone else's) and find a way to make it positive. She is determined to always find a positive outlook, no matter what.

Confident - Demi Lovato

This song reminds me of Charlie because she has what I like to call Stupid Confidence lol. Even if she's unsure about something, she sure as fuck isn't going to let anyone else know that. Even when she should be weary, Charlie builds herself up with as much confidence as needed to get through whatever challenges she is facing.

I Dare You - Bea Miller

This song reminds me of Charlie finding her self worth and determination. Makes me think of her being fed up with being silenced by her parents, and belittled by everyone in Hell. She is strong, powerful and valuable. She doesn't have to prove it to anyone, but she can prove it if provoked enough. She will not be pushed around or devalued by anyone.

And a bonus that no one, literally no one, asked for:

Three Songs That Remind Me of Charlie and Someone Else:

homecoming queen? - Kelsea Ballerini (Charlie @ Helsa)

So. Charlie. And. Helsa. So much. I feel as though Charlie really did (and still sorta does) truly care about Helsa. But as they grew older, Helsa became more popular and Charlie became an easy target for blatant bullying due to her different views. However being as close as their families were, Charlie had an idea of the things Helsa hid behind closed doors. She would have given anything to get Helsa to open up to her and show her what a true friendship could be, but alas, it didn't pan out that way. They essentially both gave up on each other and decided it was easier to hate each other than work through their differences. However, that doesn't stop Charlie from still secretly caring about and wishing the best for Helsa behind closed doors. She does truly hope Helsa has someone to lean on, even if it's not her.

Let You Down - NF (Charlie @ Lucifer)

This song is a very accurate depiction of how I view the relationship between Charlie and Lucifer. She loves her father, she really does. However she is exhausted by the constant disappointment. No matter what she does, she will never be good enough for him. She has the capability to make him proud, but she would have to sacrifice who she is in order to achieve that, and that is not something she is willing to do.

Redemption - Besomorph, Coopex, RIELL (Angel @ Charlie)

This song is basically how I expect Angel and Charlie's relationship to play out over the course of the show. Charlie sees all the good that Angel has in him, and is determined to get him to see it as well. Angel does not. He's watching Charlie give everything she has to him to help him, and it's breaking him because he doesn't believe he can be changed for the better. He cares about her, truly. But he also believes he (as well as everyone else in Hell) are a lost cause and she shouldn't be wasting her energy on him.

Song Links Below: Bluebird , Confident , I Dare You homecoming queen? , Let You Down , Redemption

#AH OMG THAT WAS SO MUCH #IM SO SORRY I RELATE TO MUSIC SO MUCH #inquire answered!#cj speaks #charlie headcanon #charlie and helsa #charlie and lucifer #charlie and angel #hazbin charlie

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fanboysfangirl · 3 years ago

Text

This is my first post on tumblr and it’s from my Wattpad so enjoy!! If you wanna follow me on Wattpad the user is sophiac0864

Our Little Secret- Riley Green

summary- reader and riley green recently just announced their engagement after hiding the fact that they were dating for 3 years. There's just one thing. reader is pregnant and they decide to keep it secret. reader is a country singer. she performs on the CMA awards and has to reveal that she's pregnant. y/hs- your home state y/ht- your home town

—

I stared at myself in the mirror. I had a long black dress on and my hair was curled to my shoulders.

"You ready to go?" I looked behind me to see my fiancé in a suit. This was the one rare occasion that he actually wore one.

"You look pretty good." I said complimenting him.

"I'm nominated for an award tonight. I had to look good. You look beautiful by the way."

"I had to look beautiful. I'm nominated for an award. And I'm preforming." I said mocking him. He gave me a quick kiss before we both got into his truck.

"Riley, you know our little secret isn't gonna be a secret anymore right?"

"I know. You know it's kinda your fault." I laughed and gave him a look.

"Why is it my fault!"

"Because your performing. If you weren't performing then we could've stayed at home and if we won an award we could've just sent in a video." He said with a smirk.

"Your an ass hole."

—

We drove from our hotel room to where the awards were being held.

"Here we go." Riley grabbed my hand and we walked the red carpet where the paparazzi and the reporters were.

A reporter came up to us.

"Here we have Y/n Y/ln and Riley Green. Looking fabulous guys." I smiled at her and the camera as it took a picture.

"I just wanted to say congratulations on your engagement and your pregnancy?" She asked. I nodded.

"Congratulations. I'm sure you both will be great parents!" We smiled and kept walking until we were in the actual building and in our seats. Needless to say we were stopped multiple times beforehand.

—

An hour later one of he bodyguards came and escorted me to the back of the stage to get ready to perform with one of my best friends. Gabby Barrett.

"Please welcome to the stage Gabby Barrett!"

She walked out and I heard the music start playing.

"He's a phone call to his parents

He's a Bible by the bed

He's the t-shirt that I'm wearin'

He's the song stuck in my head

He's solid and he's steady

Like the Allegheny runs

He knows just where he's goin'

And he's proud of where he's from!

One of the good ones

He's one of the good ones!"

After making sure my earpiece and microphone were working I walked out. Gabby smiled at me but then her face turned into a shocked expression.

"A love me like he should one

Like he wrote the book one

The kind you find when you don't even look one

Anybody can be good once

But he's good all the time

He's one of the good ones

And he's all mine

He's one of the good ones." I began singing my own verse.

"You'll know him when you see him

By the way he looks at me

You'd say he hung the moon

I'd say he hung the galaxy

Nobody does it better

Oh, the way he pulls me in

I've known a couple bad ones

But they all led me to him." Gabby sang making her voice sound louder.

"He's one of the good ones

A love me like he should one

Like he wrote the book one

The kind you find when you don't even look one

Anybody can be good once

But he's good all the time

He's one of the good ones

And he's all mine

He's one of the good ones

We should all find us one

They're out there, minus one

Some of the good ones

Yeah, I got a good one." We finally sang together.

"A love me like he should one

Like he wrote the book one." Gabby sang softly leading into my part.

"The kind you find when you don't even look

Anybody can be good once

But he's good all the time." I sang before going into the last few lyrics with Gabby.

"But he's good all the time

He's one of the good ones

And he's all mine

He's one of the good ones

And he's all mine."

The music stopped and I went over to give her a hug.

"Congrats." She whispered in my ear.

—

10 minutes later the award that both Riley and I were nominated for was getting presented. Carrie Underwood and Brad Paisley were the ones presenting.

"The nominees for best collaboration are- Jesus And Wranglers by Riley Green featuring Y/n Y/ln, half of my hometown by Kelsea Ballerini featuring Kenny Chesney, One Too Many by Keith Urban featuring P!nk, Famous Friends by Chris Young featuring Kane Brown, Undivided by Tim McGraw featuring Tyler Hubbard, and Only Thing Thats Gone by Morgan Wallen featuring Chris Stapleton." Carrie said reading the names out.

"And the winner is... Jesus and Wranglers by Riley Green featuring Y/n Y/ln!" Carrie and Brad read out together. I gave Riley a quick kiss before we both got up to go to the stage.

"Congratulations!" Carrie said giving me a hug.

"For the baby and the award. And the engagement."

"Thank you."

They left leaving us on the stage together.

"What can I say? This is my first award and I could not be more proud of not only myself but also Riley. You know coming from y/ht in the middle of basically nowhere in the good old state of y/hs I was always told I wouldn't make it anywhere in the world as a female who wanted to be part of the music industry. So I'm dedicating this award to all the ass holes who said I couldn't do it!" I said before letting Riley take the microphone.

"I can't believe I'm standing here by myself yet alone next to the person who I love the most in this world. I can't thank the fans more than enough. We love y'all so much! Thank you for this amazing opportunity to do not only what I love but what we love. Thank y'all!"

—

Hours later I was sitting on the couch in the hotel scrolling through Instagram.

"Ry come here!" I yelled out. He walked out of the bathroom.

"What's up?"

I showed him my phone that showed the news story and paparazzi pics with the headline "Y/n Y/ln and Riley Green surprise fans with pregnancy announcement right after they announced their engagement."

"Guess our little secret isn't so secret anymore."

"Guess not."

#riley green #country #country music

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kingofmyborrowedheart · 1 year ago

Note

NBC re-airing Travis Kelce’s SNL ep tonight reads like it’s deliberate.

This was on my go-to site about shows, referring to her personal life as “fall drama”: tvline[.]com/features/taylor-swift-travis-kelce-dating-fall-tv-drama-football-commentary-1235051732/

Yeah, they could’ve had it planned in advance since the football match ups are released so far ahead and they thought it would work well, but I highly doubt it since Saturday Night Live is usually back during this time of year. It just seems like they’re trying to hop on the bandwagon.

I saw on Access Hollywood last night that they were asking Kelsea Ballerini about it since she was the musical guest when he hosted and she jokingly thanked Taylor for the re-run, and Little Big Town was also asked about their relationship, but it’s like why are you asking people about something they probably don’t know about when you could be asking them something relevant to the event that they are there for.

The article calling their relationship a “storyline” and the drama they want to watch is so invasive and weird. Like Taylor isn’t attending games so you can have something to watch in lieu of a scripted drama, she’s there to support someone she’s getting to know. I just don’t understand why it can’t be like every other celebrity that attends a game where they show them before the game or at the very start, say that they’re there and then move on and not once cut back to them. There’s no need to have a camera trained on her to see her reaction to plays, let her be like every other spectator. For what it’s worth, there is plenty of drama existing during the actual game and there’s plenty of actual scripted shows that one could watch to get their drama fix while this season’s fall programming is a little thinner.

#asks #anons #got something to say to you*#sorry for the rant anon!#like there’s no need to ask people that know/work with her about something they’re not involved in #if I were at that event to perform or bc I was nominated I’d be mad that I was being asked about a friend’s love life #last weekend Carrie Underwood was at the Sunday night game they had the camera on her for a little bit to lead into a story about her…#watching the opening in the control room since she does it #but not once did they cut back to her during the game to see her reaction to things #like the Steelers game on Monday was very dramatic and action packed #it’s just fucked up that she has to deal with this when we know how much she doesn’t like that kinda stuff

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ificanthaveu · 4 years ago

Text

Last Name || Calum Hood

Description: The bold line you’ve drawn between what you do and who you work for gets blurred when Calum Hood comes into the picture. Old habits die hard.

A/N: Ahhh!! My first Calum fic! My first non-Shawn fic! I had this idea circulating for a while and finally committed to writing it and am absolutely in love with how it turned out. I hope you all love it!! also big shoutout to @cal-puddies because i’ve been binge reading her Calum fics which have been making me feel some typa way and ended up writing this because of it

Word Count: 6.8 k

These events were prime real estate for you.

You bounced around from group to group of people dressed like they were CEOs. Pantsuits and business dresses, polished dress shoes, and stilettos that could kill. Looks that could do the same.

The American Music Awards after-party was one of the few times of the year where you could meet the bodies behind the artists. The people that got them places on time, scheduled their tours, and recorded their music.

Your goal, as always, was to get just a few more of them to add you on LinkedIn and remember your name when a new opportunity came up that was in your wheelhouse.

The divide in the party was clear. A direct line between the faces and the nobodies. The artists and the personnel.

This was typical, but tonight, something felt off.

You felt the eyes burning in your back from across the room. You weren’t used to stares from the other side, only getting looks of acknowledgment from people near you.

But you ignored it, knowing your goal was more important than some stuck up artist who thought your ass looked great in those pants and wanted to take you home tonight.

So you introduced yourself to Camila Cabello’s manager and prayed whoever this was would give up and find someone else.

He asked you about your current project, and you gladly explained it to him in detail, still trying to shake the chills down your back.

When he turned to say a quick hello to someone who walked by, you took the opportunity to scan the room to find the culprit, but he was back to your conversation just when you thought you met someone’s eyes.

“Excuse me,” you heard someone say as he brushed past you, his hand grazing across your back as he made his way to the bar.\

You turned around to watch his back as he walked away. You knew who it was. But you turned back to your current conversation and prayed he’d still be at the bar once you were done here.

Once you excused yourself after he got distracted, you took the opportunity to go after the man who was sending chills down your body.

He could hear the steady, incessant clicking of your heels from a mile away, and the smirk on his face only grew as he knew his risky stunt worked.

“Mr. Hood,” you said as you leaned against the bar and signaled for the bartender before turning towards him. You smiled the same smile that got you jobs and said, “It’s great to finally meet you.”

“Ah, so you know me, but I’m afraid I don’t know you,” he said, looking at you as he took a sip of his drink.

The bartender handed you a glass of white wine before you turned towards his lingering gaze.

“I don’t expect you to,” you said before sitting on the stool.

He followed suit and sat down as well.

“I don’t expect those people to know me,” you said gesturing to the other side of the room. “However, I’d like to think a good chunk of these people do.”

You crossed one leg over the other, turning your stool to face him as he gave you a confused look.

“That didn’t really answer my question.”

“You didn’t ask a question. You just stated you didn’t know who I was.”

“I guess so,” he said, your confidence only making him more intrigued.

“I’m [Y/N],” you said, sticking your hand out like a business deal.

He shook it, and you felt shocks shoot up your arm.

“Great to meet you,” he said.

“You as well.”

“So, how do you know me?” He pried.

“Well, I’ve been a fan for a while, since before I ended up doing this,” you said, gesturing to the crowd.

“Was I your favorite?” He asked, a smirk adorning his face again.

You laughed before taking a sip, your reaction leaving him on the edge of his seat.

“I’ve always been an Ashton girl,” you said, a small smile breaking through.

“Ouch,” he said, his hand resting on his chest. “He does have a girlfriend.”

“Didn’t think I had a chance anyway,” you said through a laugh.

“I may know another member though that might be interested,” he tested.

“Hm,” you started. “I thought Luke also had a girlfriend?”

He shook his head at you, downing the rest of his drink.

You glanced around the room quickly, noticing the signs of many of these people attempting to leave.

“You’re good, I’ll give you that,” he said softly.

“I know,” you said through a smirk. “Well, Mr. Hood, I should be going.”

“Can I get your number? And perhaps a last name?” He asked before you turned away.

“You can get one of those things,” you said as you took the phone out of his outstretched hand, typing your number in, leaving just your first name as the contact.

“Well, [Y/N], you’ll hear from Michael soon, he might be looking for a side chick,” Calum said, tucking his phone away.

You let yourself laugh at that one, shaking your head before pushing yourself off the stool.

“Perfect, he was always my second favorite.”

“Are you saying I’m in the bottom half?”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

With that, you walked away, feeling his eyes burn on your back once again as you beelined it towards Kelsea Ballerini’s newest manager.

It wasn’t even twelve hours later when a text from an unknown number popped up on your screen.

Your roommate Tayshia grabbed it before you had a chance.

“‘Can I take you out tonight?’ Who the hell is this?” She said, turning the screen towards you.

You snatched it out of her hands and tucked it in your bag.

“It’s nothing,” you said quickly.

“Please don’t tell me you’re doing this again,” she said, rubbing her forehead.

“I’m not doing anything,” you called from the kitchen as you grabbed a granola bar and a protein shake before you had to go to your meeting.

You looked up, and she was leaning against the doorframe, a knowing look on you face.

“Who is it this time?” She asked.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you,” you said through a sigh, throwing your bag over your shoulder and walking to the door.

You opened it and leaned in once more, looking at her.

“It’s Calum Hood,” you rushed out.

“What? Are you joking?” She yelled.

“I really wish I was,” you said, resting your head on the open door.

“You’re blurring a very bold line here,” she reminded you. “This could destroy your career if you aren’t careful.”

“Don’t worry, it’ll last two dates max. You know me. I have things to do. See you later,” you rushed out before shutting the door.

You pulled out your phone once in the elevator, staring at the text.

Before you had a chance to respond another text popped up.

This is Calum by the way. I assumed you’d know, but maybe you have other guys also trying to win your affection? I would never know since all I know is your first name.

You shook your head and fought the smile as the elevator opened, and you tucked your phone away once again.

You made it to your meeting with a minute to spare, taking out your things before typing a quick response to Calum, sending him your address.

And now you have my address, pick me up at 7.

—

Your new floral dress flowed as you looked frantically around your apartment for your favorite heels.

“Tay,” you yelled. “Where are my light blue heels?”

Her hand shot out of her room with the pair dangling from her hands.

You grabbed them just as a knock came from the door.

Tayshia peaked out of her room and looked at the door.

“Your latest mistake awaits,” she said as she gestured dramatically to the door.

“Save it,” you said before shutting her in her room.

You opened the door to see Calum standing there with his hands tucked into his pockets.

To say you took his breath away was an understatement.

The dress you were wearing and the sparkling smile on your face were a stark contrast to the dark blue pantsuit and fake smile you had on the night before.

“Come in,” you said before shutting the door behind him.

You leaned against the fridge as you pulled your shoes on and grabbed your purse.

“What’s the plan, Hood?” You asked as you looked at him.

He shrugged, leaning against the island.

“There’s a small open-air wine bar downtown that has live music tonight,” he said. “However, you can’t use it as a networking event.”

You rolled your eyes at him before following him out the door.

“I only network at work events, and last night was a work event,” you reminded him.

“And where do you work again?” He asked, leading you out to his car.

“Not important,” you said, climbing into the front seat.

He shut the door behind you, shaking his head in confusion.

His hand found his way to the bottom of your back as you walked into the bar, leading you towards a standing table near the edge.

You waited there, responding to frantic texts from Tayshia as Calum grabbed drinks.

He set your wine in front of you, taking a sip of his own.

“Didn’t see you as a wine guy?” You pointed out.

“Well, this is a wine bar, so they have approximately two different beers. I also felt like they’d judge me if I ordered anything but wine,” he said.

“I believe it. We have a place like this back home, just a few blocks from my parents’ house, and I asked for a beer. If looks could kill…” you trailed off.

“Where’s home?” He asked.

“New York,” you said. “As in New York, New York, middle of the city, New York.”

“Ah,” he said with a nod of his head. “Had to clarify?” He questioned, a smirk appearing on his face again.

You shrugged while taking a drink.

“Some people say New York and mean some suburb four hours away. It’s not the same,” you explained.

He didn’t have time to respond as the first band introduced themselves. He took this opportunity to join you on your side of the table with the excuse that he wanted to see better.

His arm brushed against yours, and goosebumps rose instantly.

This wasn’t supposed to be happening.

You pushed that thought to the back of your head as you let yourself lean into him just enough for him to notice.

He didn’t move from that spot for the rest of the night, even when the bands were done.

Your hand grazed his arm along the table as you told him about your first college party.

The look he gave you while you spoke, the complete intrigue and adoration in his eyes, would stick with you far longer than you were willing to admit.

As it got darker outside and you started getting looks as the waitresses were trying to close up, Calum’s eyes met yours and gestured with his head to the door.

You followed him out, this time with your hand tangled in his.

“I’ll be honest, I don’t want tonight to end just yet,” he said as you walked to the car.

“Looks like we can agree,” you replied.

He squeezed your hand before dropping it as you both got into his car.

“Where to?” You asked, leaning your elbow on the center council.

He leaned back in his seat as he started the car.

“I’m trying to not have this sound suggestive, but would you like to come back to my place?” He asked.

By the soft look on his face, you knew he was being honest, so you nodded your head.

You didn’t expect to fall asleep on his couch, limbs tangled together after talking all night.

Your phone ringing snapped you out of your sleep, the arm around your waist weighing heavier than just the body weight.

You glanced at the contact displayed across your screen and stood up quickly, hitting answer and stepping outside on his balcony.

You paced back and forth as you spoke to your client on the other line, the sweatpants of Calum’s dragging along the cement.

Calum woke up moments later, rubbing his eyes and glancing around.

The panic left him as he saw you on the balcony. Your eyes met his through the glass, and you sent him a smile of reassurance and a mouthed “sorry.”

He waved you off before going to the kitchen to start a pot of coffee.

He heard your feet patter across the floor before you came through the doorway and joined him in the kitchen, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“Sorry about that,” you apologized before grabbing the mug waiting for you.

“Work?” He asked.

You simply nodded your head, checking the time before shaking your head.

“I have to meet with him earlier than expected, so I do have to get going,” you said as his arm wrapped around your waist.

“Leaving so soon?” He asked with a puffed out lip.

You took the opportunity to press a long kiss to his lips before pulling away and collecting your things.

“I’ll take you home,” he said as he handed you your shoes. “When can I see you again?”

“Whenever you want to,” you said, pulling on your dress and slipping on your shoes.

“Tonight?” he asked with a sleepy smile.

You ignored the butterflies and nodded your head.

“I have an event, but I should be done by 10:00. We can just hang out at my place if that’s ok?” You suggested.

“Sounds perfect.”

He dropped you off in front of your apartment complex after a quick kiss and a promise to see him tonight.

You leaned against your door after you shut it, closing your eyes for a moment and living in the post-date bliss.

“What are you getting yourself in to?” You whispered to yourself.

“I second that,” Tayshia said as she appeared out of nowhere. “Not very you to stay over on the first date.”

“I know,” you said through a sigh.

“[Y/N], what are you doing?” she asked for what felt like the millionth time. “You’re going to hurt the poor guy.”

“I’m not going to hurt him, maybe this one won’t be like the others,” you defended.

“You can’t promise me that.”

You paused, leaning against the wall.

“You’re right. I can’t.”

As promised, you saw Calum that night. And the next night. And the one after that.

You ignored all of Tayshia’s warnings as well as the ones in the pit of your own stomach.

The minutes ticked by quickly and with every moment you spent with him, you forgot about any responsibilities you had.

Your meetings grew more often, your bags beginning to be packed, and flights and hotel rooms booked.

You dodged every question he had about the ample amount of meetings you were in.

You sat on your couch, alone with a glass of wine, staring at your suitcases hidden in the alcove by your front door, a plant and a prayer placed in front of them that he wouldn’t notice.

Before you thought too much, a knock sounded, and you greeted Calum with a kiss, tugging him in to join you on the couch.

You spent the night entangled in his arms for the twelfth night straight. You ignored every call, text, and email as you tried to forget your obligations, instead losing yourself in the way Calum kissed the top of your head and whispered in your ear.

With the excuse that you had an early morning meeting, you managed to get him out of your apartment without spending the night.

You walked him out to his car, and when he kissed you goodbye, you kissed him a moment longer than usual, holding him a little tighter.

“See you tomorrow?” He questioned as he got in.

You swallowed hard and nodded your head.

“Tomorrow,” you said with a soft smile.

You leaned in his car, pressing one more kiss to his lips before watching him pull away.

You sat on the ledge outside your complex and begged your tears not to fall.

You’ve done this before. You’ve done this many times before. You’ll get over it.

Tayshia was waiting for you when you got back inside.

“Did you tell him?” She asked, her arms crossed sternly across her chest.

“I never do,” you said quietly.

“I thought this one was different.”

“He is,” you choked out. “That’s what makes this so hard.”

Tayshia softened immediately and pulled you into a hug as you cried against her shoulder.

“Whatever is meant to be, will be,” she reminded you. “Time and distance don’t really matter.”

And that’s what you kept repeating to yourself as you boarded your flight, ignoring Calum’s text asking you what time he could pick you up.

Calum checked his phone periodically throughout the day, expecting a response as quickly as you usually did.

After spending some time in the studio, he had a rare moment alone.

And he thought about you.

He hadn’t felt this way about someone in forever, and he couldn’t think about you without smiling.

He absolutely adored you.

So when you didn’t respond all day, he brushed it off. You’d been busy lately, and he understood that.

Granted he didn’t know why.

Granted he knew almost everything about you except anything about your job or your last name. Which he thought was weird since those were the two things you told someone.

But he brushed it off.

As you watched the final rehearsal, you looked down at your phone to see a second text from Calum.

It’s ok if tonight doesn’t work, I know you’ve been busy. Keep kicking ass, sweetheart.

You took a deep breath, trying to forget about him as you focused on your task at hand.

“You good?” Louis asked as he sat on the edge of the stage, taking a drink of water.

You nodded your head, leaning against the stage next to him.

“Yeah, what about you? Feeling good about all of this?” You asked.

“It’s perfect. You’ve outdone yourself again,” he said as he patted your shoulder before standing up and walking away.

You released your breath and shook out your tense arms.

You’d forget about him soon.

Calum woke up the next morning alone for the first time in nearly two weeks. He checked his phone immediately with still no word from you.

He clicked over to Instagram, scrolling mindlessly as you were the only thing he could think of.

Which is why he was sure he imagined you in the picture he scrolled past.

But he paused, scrolled back up, and looked again.

It was a basic picture, a woman leaning against the stage and a man sitting on the edge talking to her.

Except the woman was you.

And the man was Louis Tomlinson.

And the caption was “Tour starts tonight! Another perfect one put together by my amazing team, but especially this one right here, @yourusername.”

He stared at the post far longer than he probably should have, but still not long enough for everything to fully click.

You just left on tour.

You didn’t even say goodbye.

He clicked over to your profile, learning your last name and your occupation within half a second.

[Y/N] [Y/L/N]. Tour manager.

His eyes wandered down farther to read your short and sweet bio.

“Always on tour.”

It was that simple sentence that sent him over the edge, throwing his phone across the room and ignoring the cracking sound in favor of tugging at his hair and praying he didn’t see what he just did. Praying he didn’t actually see glimpses of pictures of you with artists on tour and that dazzling smile on your face that he thought only he knew.

The next two weeks went by in a hazy blur as he spent most of his time in the studio trying to channel what he felt into something useful but with little luck.

He sat in the same spot, plucking the same three chords and thinking about you.

“Alright, what the hell is up with you?” Ashton snapped.

Calum glanced up at him and sighed, setting his bass to the side.

“It’s nothing.”

“It’s clearly not nothing, you’ve said five words in the past two weeks,” Ashton pointed out.

“I was seeing someone,” he said softly.

“And you didn’t tell us?” Luke said, the confusion evident.

“I just felt really good about this one, and I didn’t wanna jinx it,” he mumbled as he ran his hands over his face.

“Clearly that didn’t work,” Michael chimed in.

“Yeah, no shit,” he snapped.

“Who was she?” Ashton asked.

“Her name’s [Y/N],” he paused. “[Y/N] [Y/L/N].”

“That sounds familiar,” Luke said slowly.

“She’s Louis Tomlinson’s tour manager. Along with like a million other artists.”

They all went silent, well aware that Louis just left on tour a few weeks ago.

“Yeah, but you knew that was coming right?” Ashton tried to reason.

“No, I didn’t,” Calum snapped. “She never told me her last name. Never told me her occupation. Never told me where she worked. Never told me why she was really at the AMAs that night. And then she left. She just fucking left. Without telling me. Without saying goodbye. And I haven’t heard from her since.”

The room went silent again as no one knew what to say. Calum leaned forward and ran his hands over his face and sighed.

Someone began a different conversation, back to the song they’d been working on as Calum continued to wallow.

“Just go see her if you’re going to keep doing this,” Ashton snapped. “You can find out where she is with a Google search.”

Calum stayed silent and just stared at him.

“Ok,” Calum said as he stood up and started grabbing his things.

“You’re serious?” Luke said.

“Dead serious, see you guys soon,” he said before leaving.

A quick Instagram search told him Louis had a show tonight in Denver, and he was on the first flight there, despite protests from every person who found out he was going.

He stood outside the arena for longer than initially intended. He glanced at his phone to see that people would be let in in thirty minutes. He was able to pull some strings and get in before then.

He went in through a back door and wandered into the empty arena. The general admission area was bustling with stagehands and security as they prepared.

He stood near the back as he watched multiple people sprint around before he heard the obvious clicking of your heels.

You walked right past him, jogging towards someone in the booth with a tablet in your hand, talking quickly and pointing at different things.

The soft version of you he fell for a few weeks ago seemed to be long gone in replace for the woman he met at the AMAs.

You had a blazer on and skinny black pants that hugged you in all the right ways. Your black stilettos looked like they could kill him if you wanted to.

The concert shirt underneath the blazer was different but expected.

As he watched you interact with multiple people on your team with a stark smile and too much pointing, he felt himself hesitate.

What was he even doing here?

You left.

You left him without a goodbye. There could be a reason, but frankly, he wasn’t sure if he wanted to hear it, scared it would only hurt more.

So he turned quickly and walked out the same way he came in.

As you finished talking to the person in charge of one of the cameras, you heard the patter of feet walking away relatively quickly.

You turned around to see someone with dark hair and hunched shoulders in the distance walking out, but you brushed it off to just be someone from the arena and went back to your task at hand.

You’d been on tour for two weeks now and had everything down to a science. Everyone knew what they were doing and there were even rare moments where you just got to sit and watch for a song or two.

You admired how passionate so many of the fans were as they belted out every word to every song without missing a beat.

You stood backstage and waited for Louis to come running off. The same as every show, he gave you a big hug before high fiving everyone else near. You joined him in his dressing room as always to go over anything that went wrong.

You sat on the chair in the corner of his room with some notes on your tablet, before you could say anything, he spoke up.

“Do you know who I heard was here?” He said.

You didn’t bother looking up at him as you said, “Who?”

“Calum Hood.”

You felt your heart drop to your feet as you looked up at him, knowing he knew nothing of what happened just weeks ago.

“I’m just confused why he didn’t come to say hi or even stay for the show. Stacey said she saw him hang around for a little bit before the show and then suddenly just leave,” Louis said with a shrug.

You wiped your hands over your face and took a deep breath, knowing you couldn’t keep avoiding this.

But you were going to keep trying.

So you swallowed hard before reading your notes.

Calum was on the first flight back to LA, but he was in no hurry to see anyone. He sat in his car in the airport parking lot for a lot longer than necessary, occasionally resting his head on the steering wheel.

He shouldn’t have gone in the first place, but now he was regretting why he left when you were just feet away from him.

He found himself driving the familiar route to your apartment and banging on the door.

Tayshia swung the door open and her eyes went wide at the person standing there.

“Calum,” she said softly. “Uh, come in.”

He came inside, leaning against their kitchen counter with his head in his hands.

“Why are you here?” She said carefully.

“Why did she leave?” Calum snapped.

Tayshia took a step back and went to sit on a stool against the island.

“I went to see her,” he said as he looked up at her.

Tayshia’s eyes went wide again before he continued.

“I flew to fucking Denver. I was in the arena, and I saw her and I froze,” he paused to take a deep breath. “Because if she left without saying goodbye, then there must have been a reason, and I didn’t want to hear it.”

“Then why are you here?” Tayshia asked.

“I don’t know,” he replied.

She didn’t reply that time as she let him sit with his thoughts.

He sat next to her on a stool and leaned his head in his hands as she rested a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“This isn’t the first time she’s done this,” Tayshia confessed.

Calum’s head snapped up to look at her.

“She gets really anxious before these tours. She drives herself absolutely insane. But if there’s a guy around who will hold her at the end of the day, it’s easier. But she knows it’s hard to maintain once she leaves, so she does it without saying goodbye,” she explained. “I’ve been begging her to stop, and she said she would go and see a fucking therapist for once…” she trailed off and met his eyes.

“And then she met you.”

He felt stupid. He was just a game to you.

“And she told me you were different,” she continued. “And she says that every time, but I think she meant it this time.”

“Why?” He asked, his voice sounding hoarse.

“She cried,” Tayshia said simply. “In the four years I have lived with her, I have never seen her cry over a guy. But when she said goodbye to you that last night, she came inside and cried.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Because you are different,” she said. “[Y/N] is going to try to forget you like she always does, but I know it won’t work with you. She was different when she was around you. She had a different walk. A different smile. A different glow. You weren’t just a pair of arms to her.”

Calum went silent as he tried to figure out how to handle this. He went back and forth between thinking he actually was different for you or if he was just another chess piece in your game.

He stood up without saying anything else and walked out.

Tayshia’s phone was ringing thirty seconds later.

You waited patiently on the other end for her to answer as you stood right outside Louis’s dressing room.

“Hey,” Tayshia said as she picked it up.

“Cal was here,” you rushed out. “He left without saying anything to anyone.”

“Wow,” she said silently.

“What the fuck do I do, Tay?” You asked frantically.

“You have to figure this one out on your own,” she explained. “You clearly really have something with him, so call him.”

“I can’t,” you choked out, willing yourself not to cry over him again. “I’m on tour. I can’t just maintain something like this.”

“I think that boy would do anything for you,” Tayshia said.

You nodded along, even if she couldn’t see.

“Just talk to him. The worst he can say is no,” she said before hanging up.

You leaned against the wall behind you, hitting your head against it twice. You stared down at his contact in your phone, and your thumb almost pressed it.

“Ready to go?” Louis said as he popped out of his room.

“Yeah, let’s head out,” you said through a breath before tucking your phone away and trying to forget.

You laid on your hotel bed and stared at the ceiling, the thoughts in your head running wild. Every few moments, you’d look at his contact on your phone or a picture you had snapped of him. You’d almost pressed the call button seventeen times, but every time, you didn’t do it.

You didn’t want to hear his voice. You were so scared he hated you.

You were terrified you’d just get sent to voicemail.

So you just didn’t do it.

For the next few weeks, you did everything in your power to forget about him. It had been just over a month since you left which was double the time you had been seeing him, but you were still thinking about him constantly. People started noticing, but you always brushed it off as stress.

Tayshia visited one night, and you felt the weight fall from your shoulders as you could finally talk to someone about it.

The two of you laid on the bed in your room and faced the ceiling.

“Calum came to our apartment,” Tayshia said out of nowhere.

You shot up and turned around to look at her.

“When?”

“The same night he went to the show in Denver,” she said quietly. “He told me everything.”

You ran your hands over your face and tried to calm your breathing.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because you created this mess, and you need to get yourself out of it,” she snapped. “You’ve done this to so many guys, and I just let it go because I get it. I really do. But Calum is a really great guy who is head over heels for you, and you can’t get your head out of your ass to realize that.”

“What did he say?”

“That’s between me and him.”

You pulled your legs underneath you as Tayshia wrapped an arm around you, running her hand up and down your arm.

“His tour started a week ago,” Tayshia said after a few moments.

“I know,” you replied.

“You always say that no one understands, but he does,” she said. “He lives the same life you do.”

“That’s why it would never work,” you choke out.

“You don’t know that.”

You sniffled before pulling out your phone to look at their tour schedule.

“They’re in Chicago,” you said. “Where the hell am I right now?”

“Minneapolis,” she reminded you.

“I have the next two days off,” you said as you looked at her. “That’s a short flight.”

Her eyebrows shot up as she looked at you, waiting for you to say you were joking.

“You’re just going to show up?”

“Yeah,” you said quietly.

The team had a quick meeting the next morning before everyone dispersed to head to the next city or spend the next two days back home.

You hugged Tayshia tightly in the terminal before she left to go back to LA.

You waited around as your flight got delayed three different times. You went between checking the current time to checking the concert time and verifying you had a badge to get in.

You finally boarded the plane and stared anxiously out the window the entire time.

Meanwhile, Calum went on like he always did.

He was finally shaking the feeling of you, but you still lingered.

Anytime he heard heels click he couldn’t help but hope he’d turn around and see you.

But he was two weeks into this tour, and he was trying his hardest to not show how this was killing him.

He ran out on stage, playing everything like he always would.

He took a moment during a song near the middle to scan the outskirts of the crows like he always did. He found it funny watching the parents and boyfriends on the edges with their arms crossed and uninterested stares.

And then he saw you.

You had your arms crossed and your eyes locked with his. You had no expression on your face, hoping he didn’t actually notice you.

He looked away before looking back and squinting, knowing it was you standing right there.

You felt the familiar chills run down your spine before you tore your eyes away from his.

They had started a new song, but Calum still wasn’t playing. A few concerned glanced and a head shake, and he was back to playing.

He found himself glancing at you every few minutes just to reassure himself that you were there.

His heart beat out of his chest and yours did too as the concert came to its end.

You watched people clear out of the arena as you slowly made your way to get backstage. You flashed them your badge and walked down the hallway to find him.

His back was turned to you as he drank a bottle of water.

“Hey,” you said softly.

He turned around quickly, swallowing hard before sending you a sad smile. He glanced down at your feet, knowing he usually heard you coming from a mile away.

But you were wearing sneakers.

“Hey,” he choked out.

He gestured to an empty room right next to him, and you walked in and sat on the arm of the couch in the corner as he stood on the opposite side, leaning against a wall.

“Word got around,” you started. “I know you were there in Denver.”

He simply nodded his head, not meeting your eyes.

“Tayshia tell you?”

“No, actually,” you said with a shrug. “She only told me yesterday that she knew. Someone in the crew recognized you. Louis told me.”

“Ah,” he said in acknowledgment.

“Why didn’t you say something?” You asked.

He sighed and finally looked at you.

“Because you left without goodbye, and I knew there had to be a reason. I wasn’t sure anymore if I wanted to hear it,” he said with a slight nod of his head.

“My reason kind of sucks,” you admitted. “But I have a feeling Tay told you.”

He nodded his head.

“I just…” you trailed off, running your hands over your face. “These things are hard. I work for months to get it perfect and then I’m there for every show and something always goes wrong. I barely have time to call my parents.”

“I know,” Calum said. “I do the same fucking thing,” he said a little louder than intended.

You ignored the snap in his voice and said, “I get so stressed, and it’s easier to just be with someone who doesn’t know about any of it for a little bit before I have to deal with it 24/7.”

“But I understand,” he reminded you. “I get what it’s like to leave everything behind for upwards of a year. And you know that. We’re in the same damn business, and I didn’t know that until Louis posted a picture of you.”

You stayed silent, staring at your feet.

“Why are you here?” He asked.

“You’re not just another guy to fill the space,” you admitted. “I thought you would be, but you’re not. And I shouldn’t have left without telling you what was going on and saying goodbye. It’s the only thing I’ve thought about for the past month.”

“I can’t stop thinking about you,” he admitted, finally meeting your eyes. “And I hate it. I hate that you could up and leave and not say goodbye and that still all I do is think about you.”

“I regret it, Cal. I do,” you said as you stood up. “I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing. I haven’t had an actual relationship since high school because I’ve been so damn busy that nothing goes past two weeks. But I’m trying to fix that.”

Your voice sounded hoarse as you waited for him to say something.

“You cried the night before you left?”

“Like a baby,” you said through a forced laugh.

He smiled back at you, the sad look on his face slowly dissipating.

“Look, I don’t know what I’m doing or how this works, but I don’t care,” you said, slowly making your way closer to him. “I don’t care if the only time we can talk is at 2:00 in the morning for five minutes or the only time we can see each other is in passing at an airport. Because I’m fucking crazy about you, and I don’t want to keep pretending I’m not.”

He reached out and grazed his fingertips along the side of your hand before hooking his fingers in between your own.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered. “I’m really sorry.”

He simply nodded his head, pulling you close to him and pressing a kiss to your forehead. Your body molded against his as your arms wrapped around his middle. You could hear his heartbeat as you closed your eyes and rested your head on his chest.

“I don’t have to fly back for another 36 hours,” you whispered. “That might be the longest we have for a while.”

He pulled away and rested his hand on your cheek, pressing a kiss to your lips.

You stood on your tiptoes and wrapped your arms tightly around his neck before he pecked your lips a few times.

“We’ll figure it out,” he whispered.

And 36 hours later, after a day of watching Calum in his element, you were at the airport, wrapped tightly in his arms and ignoring the speaker telling you your flight started boarding.

“I’ll see you soon,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“Three weeks,” you said through a sigh. “That’s nothing.”

“You left me for over a month, so I think you can do it,” he said through a smile.

You rolled your eyes and pushed him away, tossing your backpack over your shoulder before pressing one last kiss to his lips.

He watched your back as you walked quickly to security. He watched you pull off your pristine white sneakers and your denim jacket, throwing them in a bin with your phone.

When you got through the final check, you turned around and locked eyes with him before blowing him a kiss.

He caught it and returned it before watching you again as you disappeared around the corner.

You didn’t cry.

Instead, you texted the team that your flight was on time and told Tayshia that everything was perfect.

You found your seat near the back of the plane and went to turn your phone on airplane mode until a notification popped up that made you smile in a way no one would really understand.

[Instagram] New Follower: Calum Hood

---

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576 notes · View notes

kaal-ee · 3 years ago

Text

Company

Chapter 8: The other girl

Synopsis: Niki comes across a girl and becomes friend with her because he loved her company. Niki thinks he only likes her as a friend and likes someone else romantically and gets into a relationship with his 'crush'. But does he actually just see Y/N platonically?

Previous || Masterlist || Next

His comeback was successful, kyujin and Y/N often came across each other during their promotions. Kyujin hated how niki had started talking so much about you.

They went to get drinks

Kyujin: Which drink do you want Niki

Niki: You know Y/N is literally addicted to coca cola, i think her organs must feel blessed whenever she drank something that's not Coke. Heheheheh

Kyujin: Uh... Okay... Which drink do you want tho?

Ni-Ki: Coke

They went to the amusement park

Kyujin: Let's go on the rollercoaster!!!

Niki: O lol sure, you know the last time I came here with Y/N, she boasted about how she is so brave but got all shrivelled up on every ride.

Kyujin: We going or not?

Niki: and that time when she literally started crying after we went to the haunted house. She looked so cute hehehe

Kyujin didn't really like Niki romantically until now but when he talked about you so much, she felt a pang in her chest. With time she realised that maybe she likes her childhood friend.

Y/N pov

Riki came to her home in the evening after work

Niki: it's been so long, nothing interesting happened

Y/N: if you want something interesting in your life then you should be impulsive

Niki: Impulsive? Like?

Y/N: let's play a game, we write colors on paper Planes, and the one which reaches the furthest, you dye your hair that color without thinking twice. Don't tell your managers or hyungs, just dye it hehehe

Niki: If you do it with me (sheepily smiling)

Y/N was kidding but when Niki asked her she was taken aback

Niki: Come on you said you should be impulsive, don't think about it

Y/N: 😏😏😏

They played the game and got red. They went to nearest convenience store.

Y/N: What's the difference between maroon red and vintage red?

Niki: Don't know but let's go for vintage because we are quirky hehehehehe

You both dyed each other's hair, playing music and goofing around

(something like this-)

Niki: OMG THIS SUITS BOTH OF US SO MUCHHH

Y/N: Yeahhhh you look smexy

Niki: Hehehehehhehe you look really good too, I'm so excited what would be hyungs reaction if they saw this omg

Niki went home, and needless to say Hyungs were speechless.

Sunghoon: You did not.

Niki: I did.

Sunghoon: No you didn't.

Niki: Hell yes I did. Hehehehehe, we impulsively decided to dye our hair by a paper plane game

Jay: A paper plane game? Did you not inform the managers before? Wtf

Heeseung: You and Y/N are really the crackhead couple, aren't you?

Niki: What? No? Me and Y/N are just friends...

Jake: What you guys aren't dating?

Niki: No?

Heeseung: i also thought you guys were a thing

Niki: We are just good friends...

Sunghoon: You like her don't you?

Niki: What no? Why do you guys think so? She's just a good friend

Jay: You don't blush around good friends, you two are literally stuck to each other's hips all the time

Niki felt kinda confused, wtf did he actually like you? when did he start liking you? That very moment kyujin invited him to a nearby cafe tomorrow.

At the cafe, Kyujin noticed Niki's red highlights.

Kyujin: hiii nikiii, you dyed your hair red? It looks so pretty

Niki: Hehe thanks, i dyed my hair with Y/N yesterday. You know how we decided which color we would dye our hair into? We threw paper plan-

Kyujin:(sternly) That sounds really sweet niki. What do you want to eat?

Niki: oh... I'll just have a cup of coffee wbu

Kyujin: yeah same. You know I just started learning about constellations, i was wondering if you could go stargaze tonight

Niki: Yea sure why not? We could go to the park near the-

(niki stopped himself because he for some reason thought it would be wrong to take kyujin in the park as he and Y/N referred to it as 'their spot')

Niki: We could go to the Balcony of your dorm and stargaze?

Kyujin: yeah sure, i also have a telescope yk

Later at evening in NMIXX dorm, niki and kyujin were talking about constellations and kyujin's interest in astrology.

Kyujin: see this constellation, it's the Sagittarius, your zodiac sign

Niki: Ooo it looks so pretty

Kyujin: Not prettier than you hehe

Niki: (blushing) awwh thanks, you're also really pretty...

Kyujin: You think so?

Niki: Yeah... I find you to be really really really beautiful...👉👈

Kyujin: Then go out on a date with me. (Made eye contact with niki)

Niki stopped functioning, his brain simply wasn't able to comprehend, that the girl niki had been pining on since he was a kid, finally asked him out. Even tho this actually happened, he didn't feel very happy about it? I mean he was supposed to feel like he is on the ninth cloud and he had always imagined this happening. But when it did happen, why did he not feel like he attained Nirvana.

Niki: uhm... Yeah sure... Sure kyujin why not... I would love to

Kyujin: That's amazing!! Does that mean u can kiss you?

Niki: wait what? I mean uhm yeah sure... Why not?

That way, Niki had his first kiss with kyujin under the stars, like he always wanted. (Even tho the kiss was kinda awkward)

Niki had dinner with kyujin

Kyujin: Text me when you get home safely babe? (Peck on the lips)

Niki: Sure

Niki went home that day and talked to himself all night and told himself that he should be really happy, now that he has a lover and his comeback was successful. He still couldn't help but all of a sudden, feel very empty? He wasn't able to comprehend the way he felt... He thought about calling you multiple times but just sat there staring at your contact on his phone for hours.

His roomate, jungwon was worried about niki being on his phone till 4 in the morning, they had to wake up early tomorrow

Jungwon: Niki what happened? Why have you been staring at Y/Ns contact since the last two hours. We have to wake up at 7 am tomorrow...

Niki: i just had my first kiss today hyung

jungwon: OOO OMG DID YOU FINALLY CONFESS TO Y/N

Niki: kyujin confessed to me and we had our first kiss and we are going on a date this weekend...

Jungwon became awkwardly silent, he wasn't expecting this...

Jungwon: oh... Hehehehe... Thats... Thats amazing... Uhm yeah... Congrats bro you finally had your first kiss...

Niki: don't tell hyungs yet

Jungwon: uh why tho? Aren't you happy to finally be in a relationship?

Niki: Yeah i just... Need time...

Two days later Niki finally decided to inform his hyungs that he was in a relationship with kyujin

Heeseung: What about Y/N

Niki: Wdym by what about Y/N? I think I've made it pretty clear that i like Y/N platonically.

Sunghoon: what the fuck do you mean by 'platonically'. It is so obvious you like her???

Niki: (in a harsh tone) No i don't?? I have a girlfriend that i like very much please stop bringing Y/N up. I just wanted to inform you all that I am in a relationship with kyujin.

Heeseung: you don't like Y/N romantically?

Niki: YES I DONT HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO REPEAT THE SAME SHIT?

Jungwon: Then why did you not tell her yet that you are in relationship with kyujin?

Niki didn't know how to answer his question. But rn he was angry, he didn't like the way everyone was ganging up on him

Niki: uhm privacy? What if Y/N goes sick in the head and decides to tell the public that I'm dating someone? I have an entire career in front of me rn

Heeseung: you very well know that she wouldn't do something like that. You know that you should tell your best friend that you are in a relationship... You just know deep down that Y/N likes you but you led you on to her thinking you liked her just to get into a relationship with another girl. I didn't know i raised an asshole

Niki: i don't like her and it's not my fault if she took me being friendly with her as a sign that i like her. So please stop blaming me, i can be in a relationship with whoever tf i want.

Niki stormed into the dance studio and he danced for a long time to keep unwanted thoughts away.

For the next week, he had been avoiding Y/Ns phone calls and texts. He just didn't have the energy to deal with anything anymore. He started hanging out with kyujin more. They went to the beach, but all he could think about what the time you two spent together at the beach. They went to the arcade, he was thinking about how good you were at the games... Whatever he did, he couldn't get you off of his mind.

Y/N pov

It had been a long time since niki was ignoring her texts. So decided to text jungwon to ask him if he was alright or not

Y/N: heyy jungwonie, is niki alright? He hasn't responded to my texts since a week...

Jungwon: oh yeah... He's good... It's just everything yk... We have been so busy...

Y/N: oh... I see.. anyway thanks

Jungwon felt bad for Y/N, he really wished to see them happy and together.

It was jungwon birthday two days later, Y/N asked jungwon if she could come by to their dorm to give him a present.

Y/N made macrons and got jungwon a perfume he had once talked about.

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#Spotify #enhypen #ni-ki #niki imagines #enhypen angst #ni ki enhypen #niki fluff #nishimura riki #enhypen x y/n #enhypen niki #niki angst #niki x reader #niki x y/n #enhypen x reader

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smolbeandrabbles · 4 years ago

Text

We Were Like - Fraser x Reader (Black Sea)

Prequal to: Quit Breaking Up With Me / Keep The Girl / Makin’ Waves / Hurry Baby But also readable alone! 😁

GIF Credit: X

@wltz-bby @happyskywhale

Author’s Note: So I scrapped my original first idea for Fraser, and then this song inspired about 20 different fics. This wasn’t one of them, but it fit the idea so well that it landed here!

Point is, this wasn’t the Fraser fic I was going to give you, but it’s the one you’ve ended up with! 😅

We Were Like - Kelsea Ballerini Such a bop!!!

Disclaimer: Black Sea + Characters not mine / gif not mine / lyrics not mine

Premise: The only reason you have this job is to make the most of your summer on the island. But when your diving partner is replaced with an ex-Navy professional, you start to think maybe you can add a bit of romance...

Words: 9227

Warnings: Swearing / Sexual banter / Oh I guess there is sexual content/connotations too. / a bucket load of yearning

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Two sets of lips on a Pepsi-Cola In the middle of the summertime heat you kept it cool We were west coast kids ridin' 'round in your Chevy Nova Said you'd come back for me when you had to leave to go back to school Bare feet and blue eyes on the boardwalk We were counting the stars and the days 'til you had to go Since then nobody ever made my heart stop Like you did when we lived in that summer glow 'Cause we were like fire Summer breeze, seventies, all-nighter Let the beach be the background choir Singing like oh-oh-oh-oh-oh We were like a movie Said I looked too good in that two-piece And for those three months you knew me Remember those, remember those nights? We were like Yeah, we were like Slow dance, romance, sundress, sunshine Your name, cool rain, so good 'til goodbye We were like Slow dance, romance, sundress, sunshine Your name, cool rain, so good 'til goodbye, yeah Tan skin, golden, tattoo, your smile The end, pretend forever for a while

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The fan blades spun lazily overhead, keeping the interior cabin cool on the beach front. It was a little too vibrant green, pops of colour all over the place: but this diving school was also a tourist attraction so, that made sense. Fraser gazed around the room, trying to take it all in at the same time as listening to his new employer, a heavily tanned early-twenties handsome man with overly white teeth. The kind of person that would attract tourists to the cabin. Fraser guessed that a lot of the workers here would be exactly the same. He had a native accent; this wasn’t a summer job to him – he’d be here time and again – probably had something else back home for winter… “…I mean, I’m sure you don’t need me to tell you half this stuff. Your CV says it all man, it’s a pleasure to have you aboard.” “Thanks.” Fraser meant it, even if he sounded a little blunt. He supposed he was probably the most experienced diver here. This wouldn’t be his preferred choice of employment; he’d much rather be getting his hands dirty on a submarine mission somewhere – but he needed the money, and this was the only thing currently going. The twenty-something flashed him a grin, and was about to say something else when a voice cut over him. “MAC! Do you have the keys for boat 4?!” “Hang on a sec…” Mackenzie, Mac for short, leant back to call to the voice, “Sure! Back here, why what’s up!?” She wandered in, and as predicted had the same young, good-looking draw that Mac did. Only she didn’t have the same accent. “Some of the tanks are running low, not dangerously, but it’ll be just my luck that I get some idiot who can’t breathe properly… I was gonna top them all up again.” “Good shout. Uhmmm…” Mac rummaged around below the counter and held them out for her, “Here you are!” “Thanks!” She was about to turn away, but Fraser was too intrigued not to call out to her; “You’re British!” She turned to him, “Yeah.” Although she raised an eyebrow. “Where you from?” “London. Why?” “Ah, yeah I guess that’s pretty far from me.” She laughed instantly, “You’re Australian.” “Right – but the Royal Navy needed some diving expertise that I had, so, I was doing that for a while and I haven’t left yet.” “Royal Navy? Shit, no way.” She grinned, “My dad was a Navy officer for a long time.” “Well you two are gonna get on like a house on fire I can already tell.” She paused at Mac’s comment and swivelled to him; “Oh! He’s Siany’s replacement?!” “Yeah-!” “He’s a Navy diver-! Where did you-!?” She turned to Fraser again, “Oh my god, I’m so sorry – you’re probably gonna be my new partner. Sweet, can I brag I get the Navy diver now?” Mac held his hands up, “Knock yourself out.” This time she held her hand out to him, “I’m Y/N!” “Fraser.” He shook it firmly, “Looking forward to working with ya!”

*** It was weird at first, Fraser had come from a background not unlike yours. Your dad was also a diver – retired now, but he had been the one to teach you. Navy service wasn’t your optimal career, and at your age you were weighing up education with employment prospects. Sian had a very different way of running things to him. But Fraser was your senior diving partner now, not her, and while you could take boats out alone and sometimes did if you were busy, Mac liked you going out in pairs. It took you a while to get used to the way he was, you could spend all day diving with him on the boat and he would be the sweetest man, kind and helpful – he liked sharing anecdotes with you from his Navy experiences, and his love of the UK, all the reasons why he was still there, but also in quieter moments teaching you other diving techniques and tips that you’d never heard from anyone else. Fraser was so expert that you couldn’t believe he was here, even when your question was simply answered with a shrug and ‘I needed the money’. It didn’t make sense – why wasn’t everyone killing to sign him up? You were out here for a long hot summer and took this to make money, in order to make the most of it. He was here because, according to him, he had no other choice. He was a fair few years older than the oldest in your group – and when he wasn’t diving with you, Fraser spent a lot of time alone. He didn’t like hanging around with you all, and he was pretty blunt with his ‘no’ whenever one of you extended an invitation. You didn’t get it, he was so talkative out on the water - why wouldn’t he want to continue that relationship back on land? Eventually you got the grasp of Fraser was only ever at home in or over the water; on the rare occasions that you did all have to hang out together, or Mac put him front of house he was a lot more awkward, uncommunicative, cagey. You didn’t want to call him prickly but he had that kind of attitude. He certainly tried to get out of this as often as possible, and as Mac began to notice too, the less Fraser had to. That definitely made him a lot happier. The two of you certainly got close. Really close. And because he talked to you more than anyone else, and was older, the others took to teasing you about him. Constantly. At first you pushed them all off – because they were wrong. You didn’t have any interest in him, he was just a nice guy and you enjoyed working with him. Until what they were saying started to have some semblance of truth. The more you hung out with him, the more you started to understand him, the more you began to harbour a crush on him. At first you weren’t sure that it wasn’t just a respect crush, an ‘in awe of him’ crush. But it slowly dawned at you that it wasn’t… No, these were real feelings. Feelings you didn’t need to act on right away; after all, you both had time out here. But when you realised how genuine they were you began to heat up every time those pretty blue eyes flicked to you, with that gentle smile as Fraser imparted on you another tip – or told you some ridiculous diving joke. Occasionally he’d tease you too, and that was always a little harder to counter just because of the way he did it. Sometimes completely deadpan. This afternoon you were filling your boats air tanks again – he’d figured out a more efficient method in the Navy that he was trying to get you to perfect. You didn’t mind him teaching you things, and it meant you got to spend a little more time with him at the end of the day. So as your quiet chat continued, with you observing him and trying to store his methods in your head to the letter, you could see your group building up on the dock, everyone else was already packed away for the evening and dressed. Suddenly their chatter, and their eyes flicking back to you constantly became giggles, that erupted into laugher. “Hey! Y/N, C’mon! We’re going for dinner downtown!” Fraser paused what he was doing, looking between you and them for a second, but you hesitated “Y/N! We get the draw of an older man for you!” there was a suggestive look on James’ face, “But let’s go!” Your face went red, and that had them laughing again. Fraser sighed, rolling his eyes, “Are they botherin’ you?” “N-No… No… It’s, okay.” “You can go, if you want. I can show you this another time.” “No, Fraser – I-” “Go on…” He nudged you, “Don’t make me force you.” You swallowed, calling to them, “Okay! I’ll be a minute!” and turned back to him, “You don’t want to come?” “Nah. Go on. I’ll be alright.” “Thanks, Fraser.” You squeezed his arm affectionately and hopped out of the boat, “See you tomorrow morning!” “Uh huh!” That twang of his Australian accent, another thing you were certain you were tripping and falling in love over, followed you down the dock, “Bright and early!” *** Bright and early it was, it always was. If no one else was around you spent time cleaning up and refuelling the boats, making notes of supplies that needed restocking or things that needed mending. Mac would rock up early-ish and open up the shack, usually he’d bring breakfast if you hadn’t had yours already. Fraser would always forego this and say he’d eaten, leaving you and Mac in the office alone – at least until everyone else arrived to steal what was left: “You know he’s friendly and all, but you’re the only one Fraser really interacts with beyond the bare minimum.” “Really?” “As if you didn’t notice.” “Maybe you should start swapping him around in teams, you get to know him best out there.” Mac shook his head vigorously, “I am in NO way going to mess up your dynamic…” You both watched him for a second, before you raised your eyebrow at Mac, “You seem to think it’s a romantic dynamic.” “Oh come ON. You don’t see the way you look at him.” “Shut up!” You felt yourself blush again. “You have a crush, honey. And I wouldn’t be surprised if he knows it to. If he doesn’t then he’s dense!” “He doesn’t seem that type of guy. I don’t know what it is, but as soon as he’s on land...” “He’s a different person?” “Yeah?” You looked to Mac, expecting him to afford him an explanation. “A lot of guys like him are. He fits the ex-Navy profile. I won’t be surprised if there’s some PTSD in there.” “MAC!” “Look he’s a good diver, but I want you to be careful. Especially if you do have romantic interest in him, okay?” “Mac he’s gotta be at least 10 years older than me.” “Why is that stopping you?! You have what, 3 months with this guy before we pack up for winter, and there’s a chance you can stay together if you’re both UK bound. Just sayin’ – make the most of a summer romance, just be careful!” “I hate you, you know.” You leant across the counter and hugged him, before punching his arm and hopping off the stool. “Oh, I’m well aware!” Before you exited the room, he called you back, “Oh! Y/N!” “Mhm?” “See if you can persuade him out with everyone, please? You know, just once. Or twice. Once a week isn’t a big ask. I just… I think if anyone can integrate him, you can.” “I’ll try my best!” You giggled, “But I’m not a miracle worker!” “Hey!” He grinned, “All I ever ask from anyone is their best!" Your day of diving was pretty easy: Fraser enjoyed getting the more skilled divers so he could take you out deeper into the ocean, dive for a little longer and get a little more technical. However, he didn’t appreciate it when they started messing around and pretending they knew better than he did. They got one hell of a stern telling off and a lecture about the Navy that honestly you couldn’t help but smirk through. Then they were on their best behaviour. More than a few times he’d received a few complaints about it – and seemed not to give a damn when Mac always approached with an “Urm, Fraser, could I have a minute…” Only for you to fiercely back up his story without any hesitation. Mac always looked at you like it was more than a little ironic; you were always one to mess around. But you had real certificates – you were an instructor – you could get yourself out of trouble you got into. And you wouldn’t be putting a whole group of divers in danger doing so. Today you were sitting on the side of the boat as he navigated it out to his chosen diving spot – you wondered what Fraser liked so much about this one. He was prepared to answer. “It’s a little deeper, that might not sound so great, but there’s more space. Less to get distracted by… Just reminds me of what I’m more used to.” “…Which is?” “Diving, diving. Weighted seabed stuff. Technical ship and submarine dives, marine salvage. Things like that. I have nearly every diving certification it’s possible to get.” He gave a shrug, “When I started back in Australia it was a little like this. Reef diving and snorkelling… But that’s not where I ended up.” “When I think diving, I certainly think… this. I’ve done weighted diving a few times, I never found it easy.” “You’ll get used to it.” His smile was small, “It’s a little more of a job than a vacation.” “Then…” You rose and crossed to him, “why are you all the way out here taking amateurs on reef trips?” “A means to an end. Needing the money. Waiting for a job to come up again. Then I’ll go real diving.” “This is real diving.” He looked across to you, grinning, “Naw, now I’d think with a Navy dad – even you wouldn’t think that!” You laughed, “What, do I have to hold you to marine salvage diving now?” “Ah, I think you’d like-!” “Oh yeah?” “Yeah, girl like you could probably handle all those sailors with no problem.” “Was that a compliment?” He chuckled, “Round about.” then tossed his head back, “Go on, you better go make sure they’re suited up! We’re almost there.” “I will.” You smiled, then paused at the door to take him all in again, “...Fraser.” “Uh huh.” “Before we leave… will you take me out? Just you and I?” Your heart fluttered but you pushed it back. Yes, you just wanted him to yourself. You wouldn’t deny it, but you weren’t about to ask him out. “Will you listen to a word I say?” “I’ll try my best.” You gave him your biggest eyes, and he scoffed. “Yeah right. But sure, it’d be fun. I won’t deny that.” “F-Fun?” This time he turned those blue eyes on you in such a way that you thought your heart might dead on stop. “Yeah. You’re a cool girl, Y/N. And I trust you in the water. I’ll show ya a thing or two!” You couldn’t help but internally groan at that, and left quickly so not as to heat up in his presence. Sure, he might. But you wondered if it would be the thing or two that you wanted him to show you. *** He still wouldn’t come out with you all, you tried your best – and be it tentatively, sweetly, teasingly or just angrily, Fraser never agreed to going. You didn’t want to tell Mac to just give up but sometimes you thought about it. Tonight, after you’d eaten you wanted to take a night out on the town for yourself, and swung by your favourite little restaurant bar. The tables spilled out over the boardwalk and the dancefloor straddled both outside and inside, even though it was small. So if you wanted you could dance in the open air. You just liked to dance without the rest of your friends around, and usually liked to dance alone.

You headed to the bar first, and worked up the confidence to get on the floor with your single drink. You nursed it for a little while, but eventually swaying on the bar stool had you up on the floor. It was easy for you to make friends – and sometimes you found girls here who had been on boats during the week, so you weren’t ever really alone. It got later and night really drew in, lamps on the boardwalk igniting and bathing everything in a soft yellow glow. The pretty hanging lights in bars were turned on up and down the street, and it was about your favourite time of night. Yet that wasn’t where your eyes were pulled tonight – instead your eyes were drawn to the bar. Holy shit-! Your heart threatened to get the better of you, although his back was to you and he was keeping to himself, it was unmistakably Fraser sitting up there. You had to let yourself calm down before you gained enough confidence to make your way over – but you couldn’t help but wonder if this was how he spent all his evenings. Was this why he didn’t want to be out with the rest of you? “Hey!” He looked up from his drink – make that drinks; Fraser’s bottle of beer was accompanied by what appeared to be water, and then soda. “How long have you been here?!” Was how he chose to make conversation, no how are you, no sweet smile. The man you spent most of your time with during the day appeared long gone. “Longer than you, I’ve been dancing!” “Oh. I didn’t notice.” You had to pretend that didn’t hurt at all as you settled in next to him, “Is this usual for you?” “No, I just… needed a night out. I’m not a great drinker.” “You’re Australian!” His laugh wasn’t warm, “Yeah, alcohol tends to mess with-” Fraser stopped short and turned back to you, “You out alone?!” He was concerned, instantly. “Yeah…” “You do THAT often!?” “I like the breather. So, yes.” His face pulled into a frown but he said nothing more, turning back to his array of drinks, it was the water he finished first. You were still staring at him; there was something about him not in sunlight. You’d only ever seen him in bright sunshine, but now the shadows were giving you an altogether different picture – his eyes were a deeper blue than usual, and the darkness cut his body distinctively; he looked a lot older than you thought he was. There was a lot of trouble etched into him and the way that he slumped his body over the bar like that; a lot you guessed Fraser would never open up to you about in a million years. And he didn’t look back at you. “Fraser.” When he did turn, he seemed more surprised that you’d still be there. “Dance with me.” “Wh-” You stood and took his hand, hardly believing that you had the confidence. “Please!” “No.” He pulled his hand back, “No, no. That’s not my scene.” “Oh c’mon.” “No. I can’t dance.” “Everyone can dance, even if it’s badly.” “No!” His hands withdrew and he realised that he was not letting you down lightly. In fact you damn near looked upset. Fraser sighed, beer to his lips as you still didn’t move, looking back to the dance floor again. This time when your eyes met his they were doing all your pleading for you. “Please, just one dance?” He put his bottle down and stood, already thinking of all the ways this would go wrong: “Okay, but I mean ONE.” You could not be more ecstatic about this, holding his hand as you pulled him across the floor, although as you slowed to choose a place, Fraser guided you to the outer area, the very edge of the dance floor. You found this to be curious, but didn’t question it. All that mattered was he was here, and he was doing you a favour, you wanted to make sure he was comfortable. Fraser placed his hands on your waist respectfully as you rested your own on his shoulders – it was obvious by how firm his grip was that he was not about to move them, not even an inch. You were a little disappointed – but one step at a time. You could hardly believe that he was here and holding you. Your heart was racing again; he was so close. You didn’t want to call it too close, but Fraser was: he kept the gap, he wouldn’t let you closer even though all you wanted to do was breathe him. Even though what you desired was him holding your body against his. But he had rhythm, and he matched yours. You weren’t sure you expected it – but then he was close to you, and he watched your body day in day out. He knew the way you breathed, probably even here and now Fraser was noticing things about you that you didn’t know yourself. Of course he could dance with you, just like you’d asked, and maybe for one song. But then he didn’t let you go when it was over… Maybe that was because you were locked in a stare like this, your constant wish to pull him closer, the way you knew how hot you were getting under the weight of his eyes; because of how nervous you were, the proximity of his body to yours. You couldn’t stop your eyes from flicking to his lips; you wanted to lean forward and kiss him. More than anything. You couldn’t, you couldn’t risk everything on trying to kiss him here. The rest of your summer would be so awkward that you’d have rather hurled yourself off the side of the boat than risk this… Fraser knew how you felt. It was damn near impossible to ignore when you were this near to him. The way you hung onto every word he said during the day and were damn near besotted with him didn’t escape his notice either. How everyone else teased you for it; yeah, he realised that too, none of you were as subtle as you thought you were. But you were young and impressionable and you just had a crush. A crush that would last the duration of summer, and when you went home and decided on further education or working, he’d be forgotten, and you’d find someone else. He didn’t want to hurt you, Fraser knew that much – it was one of the reasons that he wasn’t going to let you closer. He wasn’t sure he could do something in such measures – something he knew would only ever be a summer fling? It never occurred to Fraser to want to put effort into something like that. You weren’t the only one that was going to get hurt.

Fraser kept his eyes on those around you as the dancefloor became more crowded. Telling himself he was only pulling you closer because he had to. It wasn’t far from the truth, this time he wasn’t really meeting your eyes; and his hands kept in that same position. He’d placed you outside to avoid the majority of people, more space. More air. But as people encroached on you, Fraser tensed more and more, until you knew it was uncomfortable for him. It broke you from your trance; where you could breathe him, close enough to feel the heat from his body as it dissipated from the day. A warmth you wanted to be held in. It was too much, it was too close, and Fraser’s dislike of the situation had him pulling abruptly from you. You weren’t sure you understood even when you felt that change in him. “Y/N, I’m sorry but I-” He shook his head, “S-Sorry.” He didn’t even let you say it was okay before he was off and back to the bar. You sighed gently, moment over. Maybe the only moment you’d get with him all summer. And you hadn’t even remembered to savour it.

***

You’d had your first taste, and you couldn’t help but crave more. So you kept going back; you couldn’t be sure if it was Fraser’s favourite spot, if this was where he spent his evenings. It had been once; and maybe he wasn’t around tonight… the night after… the night after that… because he was busy elsewhere. You kept holding onto the thought that he’d turn up eventually – it wasn’t something you wanted to discuss at work. In fact Fraser’s attitude to you at work didn’t change, almost as if it had never happened. Yet you didn’t understand how he could just act that way – it’d affected you, clearly. Why not him? You didn’t want to confront him about it, in fact it forced you to face the fact that maybe friends was all this was ever going to be… Even over a three month ‘summer fling’ you’d be nothing more than one close dance at one small bar. Fraser did eventually turn up again, but by the time he did you were already a little preoccupied. It was a little later than he’d been in here before and he ordered the same from the bar before sitting. You’d already been here a few hours – but had already been to a bar with the rest of the crew. And you were now drinking on top of ‘pre’-drinking. Stupid, you knew, but it was okay to get drunk every once in a while. As long as it wasn’t totally black out. It took Fraser a little while to spot you and, once he did, he became immediately concerned – it was obvious that you were a little too far gone. You shifted around without any real sense of rhythm, your face was flushed, you were laughing a little to loud and a little too much. What really struck Fraser were the men around you. All a little too close, the one nearest you giving off the most obvious vibes that Fraser didn’t like. Although you were laughing, it was clear that whatever question he was asking (Fraser could only guess), was being met with refusal. But once wasn’t enough, it had been at least three or four times and this guy only seemed to get closer, his friends joining in, with him continuously taking your hand back. This was only going to go two ways and neither ended well for you in Fraser’s eyes; he tipped his glass back, thanked the bar tender and rose from his seat. “You guys want to leave her alone now?” “What?” He turned, looking Fraser up and down with a raised eyebrow, “What’d you say?” “I said leave her alone. I’ve been watchin’ you from over there and she’s said no at least four times. Just walk away man.” “This is none of your business.” Getting up in Fraser’s face wasn’t a good idea, but he didn’t know that yet. “F-Fraser!” Your voice sounded more than overjoyed as you spotted him, “You’re back!” “Oh, I think you’ll find it is my business.” Fraser was unfazed, he’d dealt with people like this plenty of times, “She’s drunk, walk away.” “Make me.” “I’d rather not.” He tipped his head, “Walk. Away.” “Who are you, her boyfriend?!” “Concerned work college, actually.” Fraser extended his hand out for yours, ��Y/N, sweetheart, let’s go. C’mon.” The man stepped between you as you lurched forward, “She’s not going anywhere.” “Kid. I was in the British Royal Navy, you really wanna mess with that?!” He hesitated, and backed up a little, “Yeah I thought so.” Fraser pushed passed him and took your hand, “Come on. Let’s go.” “But, I-” “Honey, you can barely walk and I need to leave before this asshole says another word, c’mon.” “Fraser, I…” You stumbled as Fraser tried to pull you with him, leaving him fixing the men with an icy stare. “Leave. Before I have a chance to show you what I’m really capable of.” It was enough, for now. But Fraser knew they’d be back, looping his arm around you. “Okay, come on… We’re getting you out of here.”

It was not easy to walk you home – and Fraser didn’t know where you resided. He knew the group of you shared rooms somewhere on the island, but he’d never been interested enough to find out where. Right now he was regretting it. He wasn’t sure how many you’d had, but by now you were all giggles and slurred words, hardly able to walk properly without him supporting you. A mess. He wasn’t the biggest fan of taking you back to his, although Fraser at least knew he could look after you here. You started asking random questions about everything – only to repeat them seconds later, still joyful. Fraser tried to answer them calmly and different every time, so as not to be driven stir crazy by his own explanation. But very soon your joy turned to puzzlement, and then you frowned a little, hands to your stomach. Fraser knew this one well too; “Are you gonna be sick?” You just nodded and he grabbed your hand, running you to the bathroom. Well, this wasn’t the way either of you thought you’d be spending your evening or time together. Pretty soon you were crying and apologising as Fraser held your hair off your face and rubbed your back. “Shit, I’m so sorry… I’m so, so sorry…” “I’m just glad you’re here and not with some dick somewhere else… Now don’t talk.” Still, you kept repeating it as he sat with you. As you quietened down, he brought you a glass of water: “Drink it, you’ll just get dehydrated.” Whether or not you would keep it down was another question entirely, but Fraser needed to make sure he was helping you. It was in one of these moments of quiet, where you just looked in pain, that you turned to him. You were a little less pale and sweaty now – maybe you were calming down. He hoped so, but knew if it was necessary, he’d stay up with you all night. “What did you mean…?” “Huh?” “When you threatened him you said… he wouldn’t want to mess with a Navy man?” “Would you like to mess with someone who has had military training?” “Prob’ly not.” You shook your head, closing your eyes as you felt dizzy again. You just wanted everything to stop spinning and for your stomach to calm down. Fraser couldn’t tell you the real reason, couldn’t tell you what he was really capable of. The potential that had to destroy things very quickly if you didn’t understand wasn’t worth the effort of explaining. “Hey…” He rubbed your back in soothing circles once more, “You’re gonna stay, okay? I’ll get set up on the sofa, it’s no big deal – you’re gonna be alright here while I sort you out, yeah?” You nodded, and then very nearly gasped as he leant forward and pressed his lips to your forehead, “Alright, sweetheart, give me a few minutes. Yell if you need me.” You didn’t, and took to lying in the most comfortable position you could find on the cool bathroom floor. He stopped by once to throw you a shirt and tracks. Which you could just about wriggle into without causing yourself too much more discomfort. Fraser collected you from the floor a little later, opting to let you walk on your own rather than carrying you. You’d still be tender, and who knows what would happen if he folded your body in a certain way. There were at least 3 glasses of water on the side table as he helped you into bed – and some hangover medication. “It’s not really something I take a lot of, but I hope this one helps…” “It’s better than nothing, whatever it is.” He laughed gently, tucking your hair back. He’d left a bucket, just in case. “Bathroom is just down there though, I’m gonna be right outside on the couch. If you need me or anything else… Well, okay, maybe don’t wake me unless you really have to. But I think you might be down for the count for a while. Just… keep calm, settle down. Get some rest alright?” You nodded, suddenly completely embarrassed, “Thank you…” you covered your face, “I’m sorry.” “Stop apologising. You think I don’t know what a bad night out feels or looks like? It happens, Y/N.” Fraser smiled, “Sleep well. I’ll see you in the morning.” “See you in the morning Fraser… goodnight.” You didn’t hear him exit the room and close the door though – by the time he did that, your body had already put you to sleep through exhaustion. **

When you woke up in the morning it was slowly. Your head was still pounding, but your stomach seemed to be settled. You were huddled up in his duvet, hiding from the world; you took the pill and drank as many of the glasses of water as you could manage. Luckily you hadn’t been ill again, but you were glowing with embarrassment. You must have screwed any chance that you had with him completely. How couldn’t you have? Why had you done something so stupid?! How had you allowed yourself to get so inebriated that Fraser had to see you like that-!! The bedroom door was cracked and your dress was now hung up on the wardrobe. Fantastic; you’d have to do a walk of shame, and you hadn’t even had sex with him. Eventually the pill seemed to kick in, and you sat up slowly. His apartment seemed quiet, you heard Fraser shuffling around but you were enjoying the lack of noise. If you were back with the gang there’d be yelling and screaming already - especially if one of you was hungover. You slowly sipped another glass of water as you stood, shrugging yourself out of his shirt and track shorts you sighed gently. Wearing his clothes too!? Living the dream in the worst way possible…! You pulled on your dress, smoothing it down to look as modest as possible – it wasn’t so revealing, but it was relatively short and strappy. The kind of thing to be worn over a bikini, rather than the way you’d been wearing it. Eventually you thought you’d hidden in here long enough, and took a deep breath, opening the door on his main living area. It was surprisingly clean; you weren’t sure what you were expecting – but you’d lived with men before and they weren’t this neat. That’ll be the Navy… You scanned the room, worn but still nice. Probably in need of a repaint and new furniture in the not too distant future. But good for the busy summer job worker that currently inhabited it. Fraser was sitting up to the kitchen counter, preoccupied with whatever was in front of him. You walked slowly, making sure to balance the glasses, and were immediately curious. You paused before you reached the counter, and were a little taken aback. Sitting in front of him were a multitude of pills of different sizes and varieties. You did the math quick and none of them were in the same quantity. Before he settled on his choices and cleared the rest away into a capped bottle. Fraser didn’t look up until you placed the glasses down, looking bewildered. He picked one of his pills up and swallowed slowly with water. “They’re not drugs.” He could read your look, and that was the first thing you were worried about. “…Then wh-” “I have a personality disorder. They’re my medication.” He said it so matter-of-fact. So blunt. “It’s why I can’t drink a lot, it’s why I can only be around you guys for so long.” Your face changed dramatically and you dropped your head, upset in realisation; “They wear off.” “Exactly. Smart girl.” He repeated the same slow swallow with the remaining collection. “I’ve always been better in water, always. But what I’d do without them… Y’know I need this. Alone is gonna stop me from doing anything stupid. I’m sorry, I should have said something.” “No… It’s personal. You shouldn’t have to disclose something like that…” “You’re my partner out there, of course I should have. An’ now you know.” “I do. But it’s staying between us.” You placed your hand over his, reassuringly, “And I’m the one that’s sorry, I can’t believe you had to see that. I’m an idiot.” “Y/N, I’ve seen people out of their mind drunk before. You’re not the first, you won’t be the last. Forget about it – I’m just glad I was there.” Fraser understood reckless young adult behaviour, hell, he’d been there a few times himself. “Oh…” Your face heated up again, “Well, I… I’m glad you were there to.” He stood, “Breakfast?” “Oh. Please, yeah.” “I’ve had mine, need it for the meds, but… help yourself…” He pointed to several cupboards, “Plates and bowls, mugs and glasses, cereals, cutlery is there, bread there… fridge is…” He waved, “You get it.” “Thank you.” You smiled politely, and walked from place to place as he’d indicated, making your own breakfast. He was reading the paper this morning; it always just gave him something to do. But you were a much more pleasant distraction. And that dress was easy on the eye. Fraser tipped his head, eyes tracing your body through your clothing; it was very nearly backless too, and your sun kissed shoulders and back held a radiant glow in the morning light that was not visible in the darkness, nor club lighting. He’d never seen this much of you before, and he couldn’t help but watch you – you were beautiful. Fraser wasn’t about to deny that, he was just very aware that you had a massive crush. And he wasn’t sure initiating anything with you was a good idea. Whether he wanted to or not. It’s a summer thing, she’ll get over me. It won’t be too hard for someone like her. Besides, Fraser was as worried about if he’d ever get over you. You noticed him watching you, the ways that his eyes always seemed to trace you. It was subtle – and you weren’t trying to read it as what you hoped it was. His blue eyes had this wildness to them, you’d noticed it the other night. That certainly wasn’t subtle, and clearly very subdued by the medication he had to take; you’d never seen him look like this in light like this. It made you swallow hard, left a knot in your stomach that wasn’t uncomfortable. It wasn’t often you’d felt that. You’d been attracted to men before, teenage crushes. Either they were way too old for you, or they were your age and it was teenage love – you’d never taken that ‘sleeping with someone’ leap. Out here on a tropical island alone, you had the opportunity to explore things, but hadn’t yet. Here he was, sitting in front of you and staring at your body… Yet he’d pushed you away on the dancefloor, and you still had to spend time working with him. When Fraser’s eyes met yours again you swore you felt a shiver run through you. You stepped back; heat suddenly rushing places that did make you feel uncomfortable. You body was about to betray you and you were afraid of being unable to control it. “I- I best get going… T-Thank you, for… looking after me and for breakfast. But the guys, they’ll be so worried.” “I get it…” He stood, rounding the table, “I can walk you back to the main strip, you can figure it out from there and-” “No! No!” You ran around his apartment quickly, collecting your bag and shoes, “I’ll be fine, thank you Fraser. I really mean it-” He stopped you before you got to the door. “You’re sure you’re okay?” “Yes!” NO! Definitely NOT! “Okay.” He opened his door for you, “Take care of yourself. And I’ll see you tomorrow morning, right?” “Right.” You nodded to him, voice super quiet, timid and embarrassed about the situation once again. You gave a gentle wave. “Goodbye, Fraser. Have a good day!” “You too, Y/N…” He leant on the door, unsure if he should ask you to stay. Knowing it was better to let you leave, “Be careful.” *** You weren’t about to curse your good luck. You certainly weren’t about to take credit for it, either, but ever since that night, Fraser had started hanging with you a little. Suddenly he’d turn up for breakfast, and even if he took it and ate alone – he’d make sure to spend five minutes conversing with you. He’d never stayed late enough for drinks, but every once in a while, you’d been able to convince him to join you all for dinner. Progress. Great progress. For him too. And although a lot of times he was on the edge of the conversation, the end of the table for quick escapes, Fraser was always next to you. His focus started with you, and branched to the rest of the team and group conversations slowly. But it was still there. When you didn’t need to pay full attention to him to keep him in the conversation, to make sure he was okay, you started to notice other little things about him. Fraser stimmed. First you noticed the way he’d bounce his leg, hand moving over it in sporadic intervals, then how he’d touch the tips of his fingers, back and forth. There was one other place you noticed it, but until you’d witnessed him do this, it hadn’t really occurred to you. Part of his diving toolkit was a knife, it wasn’t big and you’d hardly call it dangerous, Mac wouldn’t have allowed it otherwise (and it seemed clear that Fraser was used to handling something a little shaper), but he’d move this between his hands and thumb the edge of the blade when talking sometimes. It didn’t seem to bother him, and it didn’t bother you, it wasn’t something you perceived as threatening, but you noticed that sometimes guests would get a little uneasy about it. Social situations were clearly never going to be his forte and yet here he was. He was trying. For you? You weren’t so sure, and yet you were almost certain it was to protect you. To make sure you never got in a situation like that again and he wasn’t around to save you. So it was because of you, and in the back of your head, you dared dream that perhaps you’d get your summer romance after all.

This morning once again Fraser stood around for a gentle 5 minute ‘start of the day’ conversation and then went off to eat alone. Sometimes you wanted to go with him, but you felt the others might see you as antisocial. Or you’d end up with more than just Mac giving you the suggestive looks. Speaking of ‘suggestive’, this morning the topic of discussion quickly turned spicy. You virtually tuned out: it wasn’t like you had experience to give input. And half of you thought most of them were bragging about things that had never really happened, or stretching the truth! But, it couldn’t be avoided, eventually they rounded on you: “-Go on, Y/N, what’s your favourite position?” “You’re kidding, Y/N hasn’t had enough boyfriends to know what her favourite position is!” You flushed, “Shut up!!” then cleared your throat, “As long as I can see his face, I think I’m okay…” “Aw, nah, see – I just like tangling my fingers in her hair – especially if I can pull it.” “In your dreams would you get a girl that would let you do that.” Mac laughed hard at James’ cocky face. “EASY! I’ll get one tonight!” Fraser had entered back into the room and was shaking his head - ‘what a bunch of stupid fucking questions’ - he scoffed immediately at James’ comment, making you all turn around. Fraser was therefore made the next victim: “What about you, man?” His blue eyes regarded you all, eyebrow raised, “What?” “Sex – dude c’mon! You’re Australian and you’ve been in the Navy, it can’t be that hard for you to pull!” Fraser declined to comment and said rather nonchalantly, “I dunno, I’m a morning sex kinda guy.” “OOOOHHH!” Mac laughed, “Damn. We keeping you from something?!” That very nearly raised a smile, “Naw, mate. I’ll let’cha know when you are.” You hadn’t heard a single word since ‘morning sex’ and whatever banter was going on around you was drowned out by how hot you suddenly were. All you could think about was the morning you’d stayed at his. The way he’d been staring at you, running those beautiful ocean blue eyes over your body like that. The way you’d only thought about him pushing you away on the dance floor… when maybe you should have been following your gut feeling. Shit, was I not reading the signs, did he-… want me!? You stood so suddenly in the middle of the conversation that the girls around you jumped and everything was thrown into awkward silence, “S-Sorry… I’ll be right back!” You needed a moment. A very… long moment… You didn’t get it until a little later, when you decided you wanted a quiet night in. Not a real moment. You’d had to lock yourself in the bathroom and scream this morning – that knotted feeling deciding to settle in with you all day, as you had to interact with Fraser armed with this new information, kicking yourself. If you’d have made a move what would his reaction have been? Would it have made a difference if that’s what he was into? You lay back in your sheets alone and took a deep breath wriggling your hips around, closing your eyes. All you could picture was his look, those gorgeous blue eyes nowhere but on you… how sometimes he touched you or held you and he was strong… what would it feel like for him to grip your hips? Pin you beneath him? Every little smile or smirk he’d given you. The way he sometimes said something suggestive, or an innuendo, completely serious and yet knowing exactly what he was doing. Then you could feel the heat of his body, how it felt to have him that close on the dance floor – it couldn’t have felt that different between the sheets. In fact, he’d be closer… How would it feel to kiss him? To have his lips on yours, to have them trace your skin – would he be gentle with you? Would he be rough with you? Would that depend on the time of morning… did his medication affect that? Did Fraser have a preference… There were too many questions… and yet so many fantasies you could have all over one man. It wasn’t long before you were sighing gently, wiggling your hips a little more, pushing up to increase the pressure and friction. And then it was Fraser’s name you were groaning. This felt beyond sinful, but you needed it. You probably had for a while. You were in control; but how would it feel to have him touching you like this. You had to know. You vowed one day you would find out… No matter how long it took.

** Your lament that this may never graduate to anything was short lived for two reasons. One was his sudden willingness to hang out with just you. He would ask ‘Hey, you wanna do anything this evening?’ or ‘You free Sunday? I wanna show you something.’ Sometimes that was places he’d seen, sometimes that was diving techniques. He was teaching you things you’d never get the opportunity to learn otherwise and you were so grateful. But when you tentatively questioned him as to what had changed, he simply laughed and said “Well, turns out I can tolerate you when my pills wear off. And it’s kinda nice to hang with someone, sometimes.” When you suggested things to him, Fraser let you drag him around; he even let you hold his hand, and you’d wander down the boardwalk together like that. Fraser was fine with this arrangement, he would let you live the ‘romance’ you wanted to, without entering into a relationship that would hurt you both. You’d get over him, you’d get over this summer. Usually you could bribe him with ice cream. He was certainly of the mind that if you were going to spend a day on the beach then ice cream was a must, and you picked up on this instantly. Although you tried not to take him so far away from the water – quite clearly Fraser’s first love – he was partial to the odd hike on other parts of the island. The second was your own resignation to the situation you found yourself in. The fact that this was never going to happen almost started to become an unspoken thing between you. Holding his hand and going on whatever these ‘dates’ were was safe, and there was no commitment. Fraser never came across to you like he was ready to commit, even if he would talk to you and touch you like he was. Everyone else teased you when you told them you were leaving for yet another evening or day out with him. Cat calls ranged from rather cute to completely unnecessary and vulgar, but it wasn’t like you weren’t used to everyone talking like this; and you went ahead and laughed. Mac was the only one to pull you to one side and ask if what was happening between you was serious. When you gave a shrug and a head shake: “I don’t think that’s how he works. I don’t think Fraser would ever do summer romance. I think it’s all or nothing…” You folded your arms. “Maybe we’re better as friends. I think we’re at different life stages.” “Is that you being sensible? Is that you meaning it?” “It’s me waiting. It’s okay to be friends. It’s GOOD to be just friends. Mac, I won’t lose him if we’re just friends. If we’re UK based, we can wait. I can wait… And maybe it never happens, but, I don’t lose him.” “You like him that much, huh?” Mac flashed a grin, he felt like he probably knew that. “Yeah. Personally, and professionally. What he can teach me, the kind of friend he can be… probably outweighs a rush I can feel and then just… lose EVERYTHING.” You smiled suddenly, “I know which I’d rather have Mac, I think that’s what I’ve figured out. That should be my choice.” These outings continued, and you ended up staying at his place a few more times – luckily not under the same circumstances! Although you insisted on taking the couch this time, liking to spend lazier mornings with him, where he’d tell you how good you looked in what you were wearing and you’d flush and try to forget the morning sex comment again. You were pretty seamless together when you were working and were heading that way socially too. You liked looking after him too, especially in the period where his meds did start to wear off and he wore a little thin, got a little agitated, stimmed a little more. He had your back and therefore you had his – no questions asked. No thanks needed. Summer was inevitably drawing to a close. You had some big life decisions to make, but wanted to put them off for as long as possible. Fraser started looking for what he termed “real work”, other summer shops and attractions started closing, some of Mac’s team bid you farewell to get back to their own lives: he remained open until the very last moment. It began to get cooler, and it was around this time you knew you had maybe 2 weeks left tops. Fraser was tidying away at the end of the long-ish day – it still being busy with less of you around, and talk turned to the future. “What are your plans after this?” “Haha. Nothing!” You folded your arms, leaning against the side of the boat, “Well, okay that’s not technically true. I might go back to school. I think a degree would be nice to have... but maybe I’ll do it part-time. I don’t know if I can commit to full-time.” “Why’s that?” “Just the way I am. If I can work too, why not?” “Uhuh.” “What about you?” Although you thought you knew the answer, he was going back to the diving he did best. “That’s why I asked.” He closed the final lock and turned back to you, “Cuz I’m going back to my freelance diving work. Now, I know, submarine salvage is kinda… niche, but that’s not all I do.” Fraser took a step forward, “Y/N, you’re a good diver. You’re qualified, your dad was in the Navy. You listen to me, more importantly you understand me. We’ve done a lot of work together this summer and it’s been great work. I’m not spending weekends out there teaching you for nothing, and it’s not just because I like you either. You have so much potential. So, I have a proposition.” You stood straight to attention, because it felt like the situation called for it. “Would you like to become my diving partner? Could always use a good one – and you’re not just good – you’re fantastic.” You very nearly chocked; you!?!? You were young and naïve, and surely not as experienced as he wanted?! But easy to teach, quick to apply your knowledge… malleable. “Y-Y-YES!” “Yeah?” “YES!” You covered your mouth with your hands, “Oh, my goodness, Fraser I- I don’t even know how to thank you!” “You don’t need to. You earned it on your own merit. We’ll start you off slow, but I think you can do as good a job as me, if not better. And together?” Well, he simply had to grin to get his point across. “I have loved working with you. And… I’m under the impression that you don’t want to lose this either. So, what better way than with a partnership?” This was somehow working out too well, if you were part-time student, part-time diver then you couldn’t have thought of a better planned out future. And with Fraser? Not even in your wildest dreams. “I don’t.” You said it too quick, and flushed, “I-I mean, I don’t wanna lose this, either.” Fraser nodded, and instead of shaking your hands he simply took them in his; “Well, we don’t have to.” You couldn’t help but beam. Your resignation to being friends was suddenly all the more important. Would Fraser have asked if you’d have pushed for something he didn’t want? Would he have asked if you were going to be a summer romance? You thought the answer was probably not; even if you didn’t want to consider that answer. Fraser had asked you to be a real part of his life. Not just a summer that you could leave up on a shelf and forget. You had time. You had so much time. You could really get to know him, best friends or soul mates… And maybe more… Time would tell. It was strange to stand with him then and wonder on where time would take you. But you were certain that this friendship would stand the test of time. And that, no matter when, you’d get to look back at this summer and see it as a time you met one of your very best friends. A man that you would love for life.

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Thank you so much for reading! 😘🙏

#Fraser #Black Sea #Ben Mendelsohn #Fraser x Reader #182 #Linzi Writes #Smol Bean Drabbles #So - Just thinking about how Hurry Baby ends - like Mac would have a proud dad moment.#He'd certainly encorage them to come visit him #He'd be like /oh I remember you kids when you just met!/#Even though Fraser is obviously older than him #Mac would totally big himself up at as the orchestrator of the romance #Fraser and Alicia would tell him to shut up!#Alicia #Okay so in 'canon' / headcanon.... They are approx. 18/28 in this fic.#But that's probably best not to think about.#So if I aid you... that's 24/34 in the scene you meet them in for her accident.#and 34/44 (ie. 2015 ages) in the 'movie canon' part of my fic.#Eh - volia!

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