Okok being a high mage, worshipped by kingdoms alike for your knowledge, it was impressive how easily new spells or potions came to your smart mind
And yet you were such a slut behind closed doors!! willingly getting fucked by orcs, goblins, werewolves and faes alike it didn't matter what dick you got, you were soo addicted to sex!!
your apprentice, a bright eyed, intelligent young man who couldn't help but fall for your charms, following you around everywhere like a little lost puppy
He had no idea about your sex life, talking to you through closed doors thinking that you were just too tired to see him when in actuality you were being fucked senseless by a slime beast who snuck into your room in the tower!!
How will he ever come to terms that his mentor, his master is such a slut!!!
kabru is canonically too smart for miscommunication trope. if anything laios would flirt with him One Single Time and kabru catches on immediately and runs it through his mental processor (does laios not know what he's doing? -> no he does. is he doing this to practice?? -> laios would not lead me on like that -> is he aware of how i feel? -> am i aware of how i feel???) and then literally the next time laios is free he schedules a meeting they sit down at the table kabru leans across looks him dead in the eyes and says very calmly on a scale of im just playing to lets get married how serious are u about this
best part of the locked tomb is if it was ANY other story naberius would be the number one guy. he’s a prince and somehow also a bodyguard and he’s a gifted fighter and devoted to the princesses and he has swoopy hair and dreamy eyes and no one gives a shit, because they’re all married/gay/focused on the actual plot. naberius is the lost love interest from a shitty ya fantasy novel that culminates in a love triangle between him, corona, and silas. this man is harry styles in a room full of lesbians
I’m sure Dumat being defeated the same year andraste was born means nothing
I’m sure this has nothing to do with the fact that andrastes mother was part of a tribe who helped the grey wardens fight and defeat dumat the same year she was born, meaning that she could have been a fetus affected by the taint in the proximity of a dying arch demon
And the fact that nobody knows which grey warden killed dumat, as seven wardens died from injuries from his death throes, and therefore we cannot actually identify a warden who absorbed his soul, means nothing
And I’m sure it is a complete coincidence that andraste had dreams and visions of the being later referred to as the maker her whole life, and behaved strangely, talking about hearing lost voices and seeing strange auras. That absolutely doesn’t sound like anyone else we know