#I cannot justify doing that every time to myself though

[hellohoihey]

I would really like to have good hair but that would require me to actually put some effort into that. One of these days it'll happen for me though I swear

[la0hu]

masha broke a bowl by accident in the kitchen and when i brought her the broom and dustpan and asked her if she was okay, she looked at me, straight-faced, and said, "no, i'm not okay." and then i realized she meant that she still feels emotionally abused by the house somehow, and i felt a flash of anger because i am so sick of her shit, and i rephrased, "are you physically injured?" and she gave me another look and said "i'm physically okay." and then when connie asked from her room "what's going on?" masha replied "nothing new." like fuck off ohhhhhhhh my god

[cherriecove]

Fine Line Between Duty and Oaths (Part 4)

Gwayne Hightower x Targ!Reader

Summary: The second born daughter of King Viserys I Targaryen and Queen Aemma is just as brave, beautiful and stubborn as her older sister but cannot deny her growing love for a certain red haired knight who just so happens to be a dear friend's brother.

Cherrie's note:She/Her pronouns. I am amazed by how much love you guys have shown my writing. Thank you so so much for your support, i hope i can keep you all happy.

Masterlist | Previous Part | Next Part

Watching Gwayne train was more exhilarating than you’d anticipated. Despite his youth, his skill with a sword was undeniable. He dispatched opponents with a grace and ease that bordered on effortless, his confidence—teetering on arrogance—seemingly justified by his prowess. It was clear that his confidence wasn’t misplaced, though it stirred a mix of admiration and irritation within you. You were captivated by him, his every move drenched in sweat yet still strikingly handsome. A fleeting thought crossed your mind: a wish to knock him off his high horse, if only to humble him. Yet, even with his confident demeanor, he looked every bit the part of a heavenly vision. You were painfully aware of how your cheeks flushed at the mere sight of him, a fact not lost on him, judging by the small smirk he directed your way after helping up his sparring partner.

Considering whether to order your sworn protector to intervene and knock him down was a fleeting thought. Instead, you stood, smoothing your dress. Gwayne jogged over, concern evident in his eyes. “You aren’t leaving already, are you, Princess? Am I not impressive enough?”

You descended the steps of the viewing stand with his assistance. “It was satisfactory, Ser.”

Gwayne placed a hand over his heart in mock distress. “I’ve disappointed my princess. Whatever shall I do to recover?”

You smiled, shaking your head at his dramatic flair. “I have every faith that you’ll redeem yourself in the tourney, Ser Gwayne.”

As you headed toward the Red Keep’s entrance, Gwayne’s voice followed. “I hope so too, my Princess!”

The day of the tourney had finally arrived, and the atmosphere in the Red Keep was electric with anticipation. Royal duties had kept you and Gwayne apart, your time together limited to quick exchanges and lingering glances. You found yourself missing him more than you’d expected, a testament to the swift and deep connection that had formed between you.

In the royal box, you were seated between Rhaenyra and Alicent. Alicent was visibly nervous about her brother’s performance, her hands fidgeting with her nails. You placed your hand over hers, giving a reassuring squeeze. She returned the gesture, understanding your shared concern for Gwayne. Both she and your sister had noted your growing fondness for the knight, often teasing you about it in the days leading up to the tournament.

As your father rose to announce the commencement of the tourney, your attention was elsewhere, scanning the arena for Gwayne. When you finally spotted him, your heart skipped a beat, and you silently prayed to the old gods and the new for his safety. When the knights came to request favors, you turned down every offer, knowing precisely where your allegiance lay.

Gwayne approached, removing his helmet and smiling up at you. “Princess, it would be an honor if you would present me with your favour. Even if I lose, I would still consider myself a winner.”

Your cheeks flushed at his words. You picked up your flower wreath and approached the barrier, the eyes of your father and Otto Hightower upon you. But in that moment, their scrutiny faded as you focused solely on Gwayne. “Of course, Ser. Do be careful.” You placed the wreath on his lance, and the connection between you was palpable. His nod was a silent promise, and though no more words passed between you, the understanding was mutual. He donned his helmet and returned to his place.

As you resumed your seat, the weight of your father’s and Otto Hightower’s gazes became more pronounced. You tried to steady your breath, watching intently as the jousting began. Gwayne’s skill was evident, but his opponent had the advantage of experience and brute strength. You gasped silently as Gwayne was unseated with a jarring impact, struggling to suppress your urge to cry out. Instead, you gripped Alicent’s hand tightly, your heart racing with concern. Despite knowing Gwayne’s stubbornness, you wished he would yield to avoid further injury. Yet, true to form, he stood and challenged his opponent to continue on the ground. Though nimble and quick, Gwayne’s superior opponent’s strength and strategy soon took their toll. Gwayne fought valiantly but was ultimately overpowered and forced to yield. As he released his sword and was helped from the field, your worry surged.

You quickly excused yourself from the royal box, making a hasty yet dignified dash toward the deep green tent. Your urgency overrode the need for decorum; your only focus was Gwayne. The thought of him hurt and vulnerable drove you to disregard the etiquette you had been taught since childhood, propelled only by your concern for the knight who had swiftly become significant in your life.

Tag List: @deniixlovezelda @kieracassette

[privateanxieties]

these final hours

Summary: When your job becomes too overwhelming, Frank decides enough is enough. A brief conversation reveals that things run deeper than he thought.

----------------------------------------

His verdict comes down one Sunday evening, breaking you from the melancholic stupor you're well into traversing.

"Alright, that's it."

There's a part of you that wants to protest immediately. It's always the first one to make itself known, because it's the one that feels the most fear. No, you cannot just quit your job, no matter the toll it's taking on you. No matter how many people tell you it's making you fade. No matter how little you stand to gain from keeping it up. Because if you do, then - then -

"Don't look at me like that. I said that's enough. You ain't going tomorrow."

There is, however, another part of you: the one that could cry out in sheer relief just by being presented with an out.

You don't even know what it is, exactly. Everyone has to work who was not born fortunate. People have much harder jobs than you do, and they get paid even less. So many struggle to make ends meet. You have neither the long, nor the short straw. The work is completely average, though perhaps below your capabilities. Definitely below your studies - God knows you're not justifying any of those student loans, save for maybe lots of jobs requiring some kind of degree these days. No, you can't quite grasp where all this melancholia with regard to your job originates.

When you really look at your situation, you have to abstain from getting carried away by overwhelming disappointment over how unjustified all this grief seems. Things could be a hell of a lot worse. People go through things at work that render them suicidal, and here you are, on a Sunday night, sad that you have to wake up for your commute.

"Sweetheart, you gotta talk to me. Alright? Can't handle seein' you like this. Nothin's worth it, you hear me? Ain't a goddamn thing in this world worth what this shit does to you."

Frank's hand on your knee makes you immediately tense up. It's instantaneous sensory overload from a simple touch and you can't explain it. It bothers you that you can't explain because it's another thing that's wrong with you. Another overreaction to an inoffensive event.

Before you can move away or even just barely take a breath, the warmth of his skin disappears. You hate the relief that washes over you. Who feels better when someone they love stops being affectionate? You, apparently. Always against the grain.

"You know I'm not making you do anything. Yeah? Need to hear that you know that."

A nod is what you manage, but eye contact has yet to happen. You theorize that if it were to happen, if you were to see him in this moment of wild vulnerability, you'd probably want to run from him and all else in the world.

"You don't have shit to prove to anyone. You included. Can't try to beat yourself into a mold if that mold's just gonna take away all the best parts of you."

Your chest rattles, and you try to keep your breath from becoming a pained gasp.

"You know, just 'cause I read doesn't mean I'm good with words. That's all you. But I'll say whatever I gotta say to get through. I ain't losin' the woman I love to a fucking job. And I sure as shit ain't letting her believe she's gotta do what the world says she's gotta do. Break herself as many times as she has to just to get approval. Can't do shit with approval, I'll tell you that."

Against all odds, words tumble out of you like a knocked over pot of crayons. Sharpness everywhere.

"I fail at - at everything. I haven't done one thing right my whole life. I quit everything I start. Everything - Frank, I can't st-"

An involuntary sob rips straight from your heart.

"I can't stand myself. I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of my days not belonging to me. I'm tired of getting nowhere. I'm tired of not having any good reason to be like this. Every day I have to know, I have to wake up and go to sleep and never stop knowing that I am the way that I am. And I wish something would just happen so I don't have to keep-"

It stops. The flow of words you've never said out loud, even to yourself, stops dead. The silence floods the remaining space without delay but it, too, does so fruitlessly.

Frank has heard enough. Enough to know exactly what you've sworn you would protect him from.

"Will you look at me?"

The softest plea. You don't think you've ever witnessed it.

"Need to see it. Yeah? I need to see it in your eyes, what you just said. And then we'll figure it out. But I need to know, sweetheart. Because if I gotta protect you from your own mind, Imma be honest with you - I need different gear."

It's a weak attempt at humor, but not completely unsuccessful. Mostly you just know that Frank means every word. And you know, as your gaze meets his at last, that the part of you that always resists outside help has lost some strength. You're not too far gone to be able to admit that your thoughts have been getting bleaker. It's a newness that scares even you, who's been down this path before. Somewhere, it seems a turn arrived that even you weren't aware you'd taken.

But Frank is nothing if not relentless. There is no road he won't track you down on and no path inaccessible to someone of his determination. You can see it in his eyes, along with the subtlest glimmer. You're making him worry, and when Frank worries, he plans. Ten, maybe twenty steps ahead - which is why he locks away your phone with his guns for the night. It's safe to say you won't have an alarm for tomorrow, and the relief that fact brings isn't unaccompanied by guilt. Frank soothes it with promises and his unique brand of realism - you'll get through everything together, as long as you're honest. No more hiding, no more detours.

You're not sure how good you'll be at it, and when you voice the thought to him, Frank doubles down as he pulls the covers back from the bed and you both slip under them.

"You know what being good at therapy looks like?"

You hum your curiosity.

"Not needing relief anymore. Promise to let me know when we get there. Yeah?"

You press your fragile promise into the skin of his cheek, tucking your head below his chin and wrapping as much of your body around him as possible and, for the first time in weeks, drifting off instead of fighting to sleep.

.

.

.

-fin-

A/N: just a short piece that I hope brings you some comfort if you need it.

[thatsonemorbidcorvid]

A few weeks after #MeToo exploded on the internet, an old friend and I did what so many women did during that time: We got on the phone and finally began to acknowledge what had happened to us. My friend shared a story of hers from college. Back then, we’d all just considered it a “bad date,” but she now recognized it as sexual assault. She also shared that at nearly every single job she’s had since college, a boss or co-worker has sexually harassed her.

The month before our conversation, I had published an essay sharing my own experience of sexual assault while traveling abroad. Like my friend, it was not my only experience—it was one of many. But I’d only included the one, because in the early stages of #MeToo, the idea of sharing one assault story still felt risky. The idea of sharing more than one felt culturally impossible. My friend agreed.

“As a woman, you’re only allowed one #MeToo moment,” she told me. “After that, people begin assuming the problem must be you.”

Out of the many celebrity #MeToo stories told in the past five years, only a handful have acknowledged the experience of multiple assaults. In an HBO documentary, Alanis Morisette spoke about repeated incidents of statuatory rape that happened when she first entered the music industry, all of which “fell on deaf ears” when she tried seeking accountability. In her memoir, Selma Blair wrote about a teacher who sexually assaulted her, as well as the many men who raped her in her 20s. In an interview with Dazed, Amber Rose said, “I cannot even count how many times a famous guy touched me inappropriately.” On a social media post during the Kavanaugh hearings, Tatum O’Neal wrote about her multiple assaults: “It was not my fault when I was 5, 6, 12, 13, 15.”

Stories that emphasize the ubiquitous nature of assault are vital in a world that so often focuses on one dramatic episode, with visceral details of the violation and an easily identifiable villain. This amplifies the false idea that assault is just a singular, horrifying incident—when in reality, many of us experience it as part of a larger, more insidious culture.

Once a person is assaulted, research shows they’re more likely to be assaulted again, a phenomenon called “revictimization.” Around 50 percent of children who survive sexual assault reexperience it later in life, and even a single incident of sexual assault in adulthood can increase the risk for it to happen again. As psychologist A.E. Jaffe and her colleagues wrote in a 2019 paper on revictimization: “Perhaps the most consistent predictor of future trauma exposure is a history of prior trauma exposure.”

Why would this be? In lieu of a good answer for it (more on that in a moment), we often blame victims themselves. We easily justify these statistics by suggesting that anyone who has survived multiple incidents of violence must be asking for it—either by acting promiscuously, hanging around too many shady men, or getting themselves into precarious situations. One survivor I interviewed told me that though she received some form of victim-blaming in response to all three sexual assaults she experienced, she noticed a stark decrease in support each time it happened again.

“After the second and third, some people began saying, ‘What’s happening in your life to attract that?’ or ‘Do you have enough awareness to know when men want to harm you?’ ” she told me. “One person even asked why I was ‘trusting men so much.’ ” Another friend who experienced multiple assaults went through a similar line of questioning, only with herself. “After so many times, I began asking myself, ‘What is it about me that brings on these experiences?’ ” she said. I told her I ask myself that question all the time.

In his essay “Spectator” for Roxane Gay’s anthology on sexual assault stories, Not That Bad, Brandon Taylor wrote about his best friend telling him she was beginning to think she was “just the kind of person this stuff happens to.” For a long time, that’s what I believed, too. As a travel writer and a single bisexual woman, I figured that at some point, I’d pay the price. Eventually, I’d have to face some element of physical harm—wasn’t that the obvious trade-off for attempting a liberated life? To me, survivorship—more than resilience, bravery, or strength—often felt like resignation.

But in some cases, it’s exactly that resignation that influences repeat assaults. While there’s no conclusive evidence as to why revictimization happens, we do know that normalizing assault can contribute to future harm. If a survivor has not internalized their experience as exceptionally traumatic, they are less likely to advocate for themselves, or demand accountability if it happens again. If they, like me, accept violence as an obvious fact of their lives, then when it repeats, they don’t seek the support they need to process and heal from each experience.

In an article for Psychology Today, psychotherapist and clinical social worker Keith Fadelici called this a “cognitive accommodation to ongoing violence.” The trauma continuously gets downplayed as victims attempt to normalize their assaults, which helps them feel more in control. “This dissociative process is a common symptom of PTSD,” Fadelici told me. “And can also later make survivors less capable of detecting risk by numbing the fear that is supposed to trigger alertness to danger.”

Oppression also plays a significant role. Those with marginalized identities are more at risk for experiencing assault in general, and thus more likely to experience it again. LGBTQ+ people are four times more likely to be assaulted than the general population (bisexual women and trangender people also are far more likely to experience assault than gay men and lesbian women). Rates of sexual assault for Indigenous women are three times higher than non-Indigenous women, and Black women are much more likely to experience assault than white women. Neurodivergent people are 11 times more likely than neurotypical people to be victims of violent crimes.

“If this is coming up repeatedly with one individual, it might be because that person is within systems and structures that facilitate assault more often,” said Jaffe. For those of us living with any of these identities, we normalize violence because living under oppression is consistently violent. In order to survive, a “cognitive accommodation to ongoing violence” is necessary. We train ourselves to get used to it, and move on.

After #MeToo, I began reading and rereading the legal definitions for rape and sexual assault to make sense of what had happened to me. Any sexual contact that occurred without consent constitutes assault? Any sexual contact that included penetration without the other person’s consent constitutes rape? The criteria felt almost too easy. Under these standards, I had been raped twice, and assaulted several other times—all stories I had not yet fully internalized, and was not yet ready to tell. Dozens of legal crimes had been committed against my body, but that idea felt so unfathomable I hardly knew what to do next.

In the three years after publishing that first story, I experienced more incidents, and I still don’t know what to call them. I don’t feel comfortable firmly declaring them as “assault.” I don’t like how it connects so deeply with an oppressive legal system, and how it automatically connotes some excessive form of violence. Even today, it seems too strong and rough a word for how these episodes played out: often with little physicality, with only brief conflict and polite turns toward quick forgiveness, until weeks later when I’d unpack the severity of what had happened. As I began sharing more of these stories with close friends, I would catch myself saying “technically” before saying “I was assaulted,” acknowledging the semantic disconnect I still felt. This hesitation is common among many survivors: As one 2019 meta-analysis showed, rates of victimization increase when participants are asked “behaviorally descriptive questions” about what happened to them, rather than questions that use terms like “rape” and “assault.”

Sometimes, people ask “How many times all together?” I say “six-ish,” a number that captures the amount of experiences that have dramatically changed the way I relate to my body—how it experiences intimacy, how it engages with the world: The one that happened at work, just weeks into my first job out of college. The one at a festival in India. The one while getting a deep-tissue massage. The one at a New York play party. The one so common I learned it has its own name (“stealthing“). The one with a lover I had loved and trusted deeply. The one with another lover, a violation that was not sexual but physical and thus, as yet another nonconsensual act done against my body, still felt so connected to all the rest.

And this still does not take into account every time I was nonconsensually touched in public—the men who pulled and grabbed my arms, my back, my butt, my shoulders to try to get my attention on the street—nor the times I’ve been followed, harassed, physically threatened by strangers on the street.

The accumulation of more and more of these events creates a compounding impact, one where each additional incident begins to amplify the ones before. For me and most survivors I spoke to, we are not healing from trauma—we are learning how to exist in a world where trauma continues to accumulate.

Every survivor I interviewed for this piece told me they fully accept the potential that they’ll experience assault in the future. Still, most of them admitted to me that it’s still easier to only share just one story with the world—never the full range of what has happened to them. “When you only have one story, the enemy is the rapist,” one survivor told me. “But when you have several people with a lifetime of these experiences, the enemy is all of us.”

This is what we mean when we talk about rape culture. The first thing we can do to start to dismantle it is to recognize what we’re up against.

[needle-thread-thimble-spear]

Revolutionary Girl Utena and Epistemic Violence

or

Why Anthy is not a trans girl (but she is to me)

~~

Ohtori, as any good setting tends to, carries a lot of thematic weight. It’s a fairy world, where metaphorical illusion blurs personal hopes over a poisoned interior structure, to the point where an outside perspective may struggle to distinguish between what a character is thinking and what is actually happening. Time and memory are suggestions whispered in the ear of its students, a cyclic hell where the same puppets are played in position, memories broken but dreams intact, to test new victims and forge new swords. A kingdom of nowhen, ruled from above by a king that refuses to see that the prison he built cannot ever free him. A hierarchy where the misogyny taught to children to prepare them for the grown up version is baked into the very structure of the world, belying a culture of horrible sexual violence. And at the very bottom of that hierarchy, the victim-witch, is the kings own sister. A sort of broken Omelas, where one girl must suffer forever and ever, not to end the suffering of others, but to keep them in the dark. Especially her brother. What Ohtori is, and the hierarchies that it represents both within the work and outside of it, hinges on the suffering of that girl. And, maybe more importantly, her silence.

~~

Revolutionary Girl Utena changed my life. I’ve been saying this nearly two years now, mostly as a joke, but with distance I can see it really isn’t. When you are in the depths of an abusive relationship, it is extremely difficult to see what’s happening to you. I don’t wish to dwell on my own story here too much, but how can I ignore it? RGU was the language I used to understand what had happened to me. Images from the show flit through my mind as though I were a Tamarian. Utena, in the window. Anthy, with the candelabra. Utena, her hands cut with thorns. Anthy with the white beret. After finishing the show for the first time I felt sickened. Not merely because of the subject matter depicted, raw and horrible as it is, but because I saw myself in it. Why do I feel such a kinship with Anthy?

I think, dear reader, you may be able to imagine the horror inherent to that realization. You might have felt it, you may be feeling it now.

It seemed obvious to me then, for reasons I could not begin to fathom, that Anthy was a trans girl. Reeling from my first watch, this felt like the only conclusion I could draw though I couldn’t tell you why. For years, I have drafted and redrafted essays attempting to justify this feeling. Recently, I posted an reading of Miki as a transfem character, and I don’t feel particularly strongly about that reading! Sure, aspects of his character were relatable to me, I could draw analogies well enough, but that was completely secondary to my actual goal. Practice for the transfem Anthy essay. Looking back on what I’d written now, I don’t. Hate? What I wrote. There’s definitely some aspects I’d repudiate now. If you enjoyed reading it, if it meant something to you, I’m glad. But even as I was writing it it felt incomplete and limited. And I believe I understand why.

What did I get wrong about Miki and Kozue? What lies in Ohtori’s heart? What lies in that bed of rotten rose petals?

We all know what does, but we do not want to see it and certainly don’t want to talk about it.

It’s Nanami’s disgust with Anthy, with herself. It’s Miki and Kozue’s confused but earnest posturing. It’s Utena looking up at Akio, it’s Anthy’s vacant stare.

Even here, I’m speaking in abbreviated reference. But it’s abuse, sexual, at times incestuous abuse, that touches every character in RGU.

I’d recently seen a few posts which I think hit on a really common phenomena among fans of the show. Our own stories, our own disgust, our own fears and our own traumas, sort of get in the way when we talk about RGU. I think it’s a natural consequence. RGU deals with heavy subject matter that is very difficult to sit with. I don’t think it’d be incorrect to say most western fans of RGU are queer in some way. We’re much more likely, as consequence, to suffer from interpersonal abuse. And naturally, we are drawn to these characters since they represent, with so few holds barred, some of our worst experiences. But does that make them like us?

For the record, I think it would be ridiculous to suggest that RGU isn't a queer show and that it isn't filled with queer characters. But, for as obvious a conclusion as this is, a surprising depth of that queerness is veiled in subtext. It’s worth considering, the endless arguments over whether Anthy and Utena are lesbians or bisexual, is sort of inconsequential. The important thing is that they have escaped, together! We could suppose that, were Ohtori a real place, we could go track down the two of them and demand from them an answer. How do you feel, Anthy, about your attraction to Akio? What does that mean to you? Would you please quell that horrible disgust we feel thinking about it? Inquiring readers would like to feel better know!

When one leaves Ohtori, one leaves the view of the audience. Utena and Anthy are in love with one another, but what that means to them (and themselves) is out of our reach.

And yet, I can’t seem to shake my original conclusion, from my first watch. Surely it cannot be intended! Hell, even the fact that Anthy is desi is sort of incidental to any commentary on social injustice, the motivation for depicting her (and Akio) this way was to exoticize them relative to the rest of the school. So is this image of Anthy as a brown trans girl, her position in Ohtori being a result of transmisogyny, some western myopia? Mere projection of the aggrieved self on a character who, by her nature, absorbs the feelings and impressions of those around her?

Sort of?

Revolutionary Girl Utena was created in a Japanese cultural context, to be sure, but it’s worth noting that while the precise execution of (trans)misogyny and other gender injustices may vary from culture to culture, patriarchy isn’t exactly exclusive to the west. There is a lot of different directions we could run in here, but the one I want to focus on is epistemic violence (a good primer linked here if the term is unfamiliar). *

In Ohtori, all girls are like princesses, unless they are like witches. And, sooner or later, all girls are like the rose bride, the doll-witch, the synthesis. This is how patriarchy works. There is a concept of “permissible” femininity, and an “impermissible” feminity. There is the wife, the mother, the domestic servant, who is permitted some limited social power by her utility to a patriarch (primarily as a mother to trueborn children). Then there is, well, everyone else. “Loose” women, sure, but also those who have been damaged by sexual violence. Those who cannot bear children, because of some accident of their physiology. These women are used, for feminized labor, for sex, but because of the stigma associated with them and the issues they present toward patrilineal succession, they are subject to various censure. One does not talk about survivors of sexual violence or sex workers in polite society. It is possible for some to travel between these two categories, although it is far, far easier to go from “type 1” to “type 2” than the other direction. Indeed, for some it is not possible to have ones “virtue” restored. If we aren’t being reduced to predatory inhuman monsters, trans women, both a hypersexualized object of intense fetishization and incapable of bearing children, are placed into the second category automatically. Lots of would be abusers are happy to whisper in our ears, that they will treat us like we are “type 1”, but invariably they do not.**

The most maddening thing to me about being a trans woman is this, inability for anyone to see the violence that happens to you. People don’t believe you can be the subject of (sexual) violence, even though the fact it occurs to you, regularly, should be obvious to anyone who thinks about how we are perceived for just a moment! You cannot speak up without sounding delusional, it can happen right in front of a stranger, your best friend, and they wont bat an eye. That you are so incredibly disgusting, no one would want to hurt you that way.

Anthy isn’t a trans girl. But the system that silences her, treats her like she deserves her victimization, that she is irrevocably tainted by her relationship with Akio, the system that keeps us, the audience, from internalizing the dreadful truth of her character, this veil of silence, of covered ears and closed eyes, is extant in the lives of all misbegotten gender-oppressed rejects. If we are going to draw analogies between ourselves and Anthy, or Utena, or Nanami, or any the rest of them, we need to pull back that veil. Indeed, it's confronting (and then escaping from) that choking, word-stopping bile that sits at the core of RGU's thesis. I don’t think it’s wrong for us to relate to the characters in RGU, and write about that. But we might stop to consider why before we do!

*If you’re curious to read more about patriarchy across cultures, here is a really incisive article on the phenomena of third sexing, the operation of (trans)misogyny and gendered violence in parallel across cultural contexts, and how that relates to the western and desi sphere (but also more broadly).

**It should also be noted that there can be no comparison of suffering of anyone under patriarchy. Even the most vaunted cis man, I suppose. But there can be a comparison of power, and this is why we discuss it rather than throw up our hands.

Thank you for reading, I think this is the last I'm going to write about RGU for a while, though there's quite a bit I want to say about Utena and Anthy's relationship. So someday, I'll get around to more! And a perennial thank you to @empty-movement for the high quality archival images.

[agirlandherquill]

alpha-write

returning to writeblr after a short break has been so enjoyable I thought I'd kick things off by creating a tag game of my own! (since the first one I made people really did seem to enjoy, and it warms my heart) and it's an easy way to ease myself back into the creative flow, so here goes!

rules: for every letter of the alphabet, compose a sentence/short paragraph beginning with that letter

A - "Anything you have to say for yourself? Or is nothing perhaps the better choice for you? How else could you justify the blood on your sleeves?"

B - "Broken. Not bruised, not damaged - You made me broken. That hardly seems fair."

C - "Can we do this?" "Can? We will. We have to. It must be done. Right or wrong, balance must be restored."

D - Dragging a corpse is difficult enough, but when you resemble a corpse yourself? There's some irony in there that even the Gods aren't smart enough to conjure.

E - Everything hurt, everything ached beyond relief, beyond the threshold of pain, until she felt nothing and everything, all at the same time.

F - Forget him? That was a plea she could never answer, could never give light to or thought or hope, to forget was to forgo herself, her feelings, her very being - He was as much a part of her as the air in her lungs - to lose him would be death.

G - "Go." Not a scream, not a growl, but a whisper - a calm command that sent the hairs raising along her skin. For once, she obeyed.

H - How did this happen? How did she forget herself so badly, so stupidly and allow her vulnerabilities to be exposed? Even worse, how could she let him be the one to do it? He knows, and knowing is death. This was the end, for her, she knew it.

I - "If you must be such a pain in the neck could you go about it quietly? One more squeak from the sole of your boot and I will rip those laces out and around your neck. I mean it." "Then give me a reason to stop pacing."

J - Just a kiss. Just. As though the fleeting encounter was nothing more than that, as though it hadn't taken every strength he had within him. To her, it was just a kiss. To him, it was ruin.

K - "Keep running. To stop now is death, is that what you want? Because I will not stop to carry your corpse, I will not stop to remember you. If you falter, you are gone. Do you hear me?"

L - Loathing burned her insides, it sent her skin crawling with heat and her muscles tensing with a carefully restrained scream. She loathed him. That was it. After all this time, she understood it. It was not love, it was loathing.

M - "Marry me." "The last time we tried that... Someone died." "Marry me." He said again, more firmly. "Marry me, or we both die."

N - "Never again." "Why? What was so wrong the first time?" "The dozens of times after that. It cannot happen." "A kiss never got anyone killed." "Then you do not know this Court, and you do not know me."

O - "Opinionated, are we?" "Is this because I told you to your face what a horrifically mannered man you are?" "No, this is because you tried to stab me with a fork." "I missed, didn't I?" "That's hardly the point."

P - Pressing her cheek to his shoulder, she let herself break, let the tears fall and the emotions flow. He said nothing, and neither did she, it was only them and the silence of the lake, and that was enough.

Q - "Question me again and we will see what happens when you try my patience." "Try? I've been getting under your skin for the better part of the day, why haven't you done anything about it?"

R - Rest was a foreign luxury, it had abandoned her body long ago, instead she lay suffocating in boredom and misery until she could bear it no longer, and found herself outside his door.

S - "Step away, out of this room and far from earshot - Do it now, before I see fit to carry you."

T - "Trust me." "Why-" She had no chance to complete her question, he threw her out of the window.

U - Under the stars, all seemed calm, a false calm, but a calm she had long since been craving nonetheless, until his voice, as gentle as the wind, startled her wishful reverie. "Leave if you must, but not without knowing that I love you."

V - Verily, she was done. Her soul was in ruins, her body in tatters, and her heart beat it's last drum.

W - "When you decide to have some compassion, let me know, until then I want nothing to do with you."

X - (if this one's impossible to do, no biggie, skip if necessary) - "Xanthetia is a flower full of poison that could damn well kill you, what are you doing lying in a bed of it?" "The scent is the only thing that helps me sleep."

Y - "You know what you did. As do I. And it's unforgivable." "I do not seek your forgiveness, but I will beg, every day if I must, for the honour of your company." "...We shall see."

Z - "Zealous, insufferable bastard - that's what you are!" "You've said worse, you can say better than that." His smug look riled her up even more. "You are incapable of being loved, you're not worthy of that, only loathing, you despicable, monstrous being!" "Loathe away by all means, I rather enjoy the flush it brings to your face."

i'll make this an open tag as well as include my tag list! (this one's a doozy, so bear with me)

@the-ellia-west @willtheweaver @tildeathiwillwrite @drchenquill @tiredpapergirl

@365runesofthesystem @coffin-hopping @godsmostfuckedupgoblin @a-mimsy-borogove @frostedlemonwriter

@i-do-anything-but-write @r-u-living @thatuselesshuman @lead-to-code @sunflowerrosy

@theaistired @phoenixradiant @autism-purgatory @corinneglass @patheticexcuseforawriter

@missmisanthrope @littlestchildofthemoon @morganxduinn @thebrownleathernotebook @rmhashauthor

@lamuradex @fantasy-things-and-such @glasshouses-and-stones @hattonthehatman @humbly-a-doppelganger

@hopewriteszstuff @ramwritblr @s-pendragon7 @thelastneuron @heartreactor

@ihauntmyhouse @shiningstars-world @scaewolf @just-emis-blog @joeys-piano

@ramitola @yrndrgn @riveriafalll @lawrencespen1777 @theverumproject

@zackprincebooks @justjariel @orion-lacroix @jupiter---daydreams @vinniehorrible

@stars-forever @thewritingautisticat @anaisbebe @whatwewrotepodcast @appleandsnow

@urnumber1star @chaotictravelerrants @andagii-projects @dragmewithyoutonirvana @a-bi-cat-with-books

@fearofahumanplanet @just-a-domesticated-cryptid @attemptingwriter @kitkins13 @ray-writes-n-shit

@theonewholivesinthemovies @rheas-chaos-motivation

[gleamingtempest]

Ming Jeung - [DRDT] Character Analysis #02

Welcome

Hello. : ) This is a part in a series of analysis' by me where I will be individually outlining the negative experience, core belief & stated belief for every main character in the Danganronpa: Despair Time cast. Danganronpa: Despair Time is not a complete text yet so these analysis' will not be exclusively based on text from the project. All segments of these posts which cover parts of a character's story which has not yet covered in the text. Speculation will always be marked by the indicator [X] when it occurs. The purpose of this series is ultimately to provide my own individual thoughts, feelings & speculation on each character with actual text as my basis for building those actual thoughts, feelings & speculation. I hope you are all able to find it useful. Please be well - and enjoy. 🙇🏻‍♀️

*Note: This post was written at the time of 7/9/2024. At this time, the latest DRDT episode release was Chapter 2 - Episode 11. Every post in this series will be redone after the full release of the series.

Negative Experience

Ming Jeung

-> Negative Experience: The most prominent traumatic events or event experienced by the character in their past, which primarily informs their core belief & stated belief in the main story.

Negative Experience Min Jeung was born into poverty, though was not in it for a long enough period to have vivid memories of living in poverty. Submitting herself to the full authority of an institute which commodified her willingness to obsess over competence & diligence as a student before she was old enough to have vivid memories of her life is how Min Jeung managed to escape this circumstance - for both herself and her family. Fatalistically, she accepted this role without question for years because if she did not, there would be future for her or her family. Inadvertently this trapped Min in a role wherein she could not see a future for herself.

Core Belief

Ming Jeung

-> Core Belief: The Core Belief is the unconscious belief held by the character which informs their external & internal beliefs about themselves & the world, or, their "stated belief."

Core Belief

A lack of personal identity or personhood - humanity - is what defines Min's characterization & trajectory as a character. "In order to live I must submit to fate. Resistance is death; not being." Min is not allowed to be human - she lacks substance because substance lacks the ability to reach her. Min is trapped, both by the world and herself. She cannot be allowed to believe there is hope, because the very nature of her role as the Ultimate Student confines her to an identity predetermined before her personality had even fully developed - before her personhood was given the opportunity to exist. Min is nothing because Min cannot be anything. Min is not human.

Stated Belief

Ming Jeung

-> Stated Belief: The external & internal ideology or belief which the character actively & consciously applies.

Stated Belief

Min is able to justify this wretched existence by believing that she is saving her family. For herself and for her family, Min can justify her suffering because the alternative is so awful that accepting is unacceptable. Even if Min cannot be human, she can be more than that - she can be a martyr. "I wanted to save you... I wanted to save them. I can't save myself - so isn't this the best choice?"

The impetus behind Min's choices is that of justification of human suffering because others would be hurt if it was not accepted. "I can be hurt if others aren't, so it's okay." Min does not regard herself as human, so she allows herself to do awful things to herself if it means that she can be a savior. Still, Min is, doubtlessly - human. Even if she can lie to herself, she cannot lie to her humanity. Min's defining action in the story is killing Xander in order to save Teruko - and then, betraying everyone by choosing to fight for her own life in the class trial. Even if she chose to ignore it for her whole life, to justify her own suffering for the sake of others, even if Min chose to be selfishly selfless - in the end, she was human. In the end, she was somebody; Min Jeung.

Design

Ming Jeung

-> Design Philosophy: In order to analyze the designs of the Danganronpa: Despair Time cast I would like to establish my method for identifying significant elements of their design to outline & analyze. -> The order I will look at the designs through will be: [Color] -> [Clothing] -> [Story]. Color will usually consist of discussing three prime colors used for the design however their will be outliers to this rule. Story will often be speculative, since we're early in the text.

Color

The three primary colors in Min's design are red, magenta [pink] & white. The primary color is magenta while white and red are the support colors. Magenta, or pink is futility; death. It is the color of blood in the Danganronpa universe & representative of performance in a cyclical manner - the commodification of humanity for the sake of profit, regardless of human suffering. Min's eyes are pink because at her core she has internalized that she must be the Ultimate Student. She can never be anything more because to be anything more would be to betray her own core belief about herself - that she is not human. Whit is broadly just a neutral blankness, which indicates a subdued, complement nature & silent acceptance of fate without resistance. Resignment. White is hollow & empty - just like Min's day-to-day life. Red is the counter or challenging color of this design - if Min is not human then why did Min act on the most human desire of all, both in the past, to have been put on this path, and in the present, to end her path - try to live, regardless of what that takes. Red is passion, vigor, determination - will to be, and to thrive, and to succeed - humanity. Clothing

Min wears school uniform with a taupe vest over it and a red tie. Her skirt is a darker version of the color of her vest & her vest is a more neutral version of her eyes; this could be considered "taupe." Min's hair is a dark desaturated version of her bright red tie, which rests in the center of her design, between her taupe vest and underneath her face. Min's bangs rest over her eyes, which are vivid and bright but concealed from the world. Min's eyes are white & pink - empty futility. "Despair." Story

Min's diamond pin is the same pin worn by a character from the creators other fangan which they have been working on at the same time as DRDT. This character also has Min's eye color & works for XF-Ture Tech, the company which funded Min's family under the premise that she would become the Ultimate Student.

[X] This is the same agent who told Min she would fund her family if she became the ultimate student. Her involvement in the Mall Killing Game is related to the creation of the Killing Game Show & is the Killing Game Teruko was referring to.

[X] Min & this person are related but Min does not know this.

[X] XF-Ture Tech is responsible for the creation of MonoTV, the Killing Game Traps & the executions.

Final Speculation

Min Jeung

-> I Wanted to Save You

Min Jeung herself will not have any major involvement in the creation or orchestration of the killing game, but her connection to XF-Ture Tech will be significant again.

Min's connection to XF-Ture Tech resulted in the creation of the Killing Game technology.

[zebulontheplanet]

Let’s talk about my masking, since it’s been a topic I’ve been avoiding talking about.

I’m medium masking. I can mask SOME. I used to be low masking due to my autism catatonia, but thanks to the medication I’m on, I was SLOWLY gaining masking skills back. But now starting to lose it again. It’s one of the few things I was getting back. And this is also your reminder. IF YOU BELIEVE YOU HAVE AUTISM CATATONIA, REACH OUT TO A DOCTOR. Plain text: if you believe you have autism catatonia, reach out to a doctor.

Why? Because Autism Catatonia IS treatable.

I used to be VERY visibly autistic. Stimming constantly, running around, just having that *look* to me. It caused harassment ALL the time. Like literally all the time.

Now, I can mask some. Stimming being the biggest thing that I could mask. However, it did, and still caused me to be constantly overwhelmed, and constantly on the brink of a meltdown. The constant suppression of stims is and was harmful to me, and I am slowly letting go of my masking ability that I have gained back because it’s harmful to me, and I’m just causing myself more harm by doing so. And I’m losing it already and just causing myself more harm by pretending I’m not and trying to hold onto it. I don’t think people realize just how heartbreaking it was to not be able to mask much at all, to being able to mask some, and then realizing that even the small amount of masking you are doing is being extremely harmful to yourself. I’ve also noticed that it’s been detrimental on my mental health, and even physical health as it is causing me to have more catatonic episodes. Why? I don’t know. But I cannot deny that my catatonic episodes, constantly being on the brink of a meltdown or having multiple meltdowns a week, and being constantly overwhelmed, didn’t happen until I started suppressing some of my stims and autistic behaviors.

I am EXTREMELY privileged to even be able to suppress some of my stims. Does this mean I’m not perceived as autistic? Absolutely not. I’m still autistic, and very much perceived as being autistic because of the fact that I’m nonverbal, constantly not alone and with people assumed to be my caregivers, constantly chewing on things, wearing ear defenders, in a wheelchair, and so on.

However, I’ve noticed a drastic change between me as someone who once stimmed very outwardly, then someone who did stim more passively. I haven’t talked about my masking in a HOT minute, because I was like “great! Finally getting some masking abilities back, let’s see where this goes” and then the second I started gaining it back, it started going down the drain again.

Today, I’m laying in my bed. Under a weighted blanket, feeling my skin crawl and having to kick my partner out because I felt like I was going to have a meltdown because I didn’t wear my ear defenders all week even though I needed them. And knew I needed them.

I’ve been so focused on how others perceive me, how they look at me, how they treat me, that I’ve completely forgot about what is best for ME. What is best for MY health. Yes, for awhile I was gaining some masking skills back, and even now, I’m more masked than I was, but I’m losing that again, and it is the most terrifying feeling. The feeling of losing your masking skills AGAIN is terrifying. Because the last time I did, I was struck with so much catatonia that I couldn’t get out of bed and needed help with almost every bADL and lost my speech completely. Now, I know that this hopefully won’t be the case, and the more I accept that I’m losing my masking skills and try not to force it, I will be ok hopefully and not fall back into that.

Autism Catatonia has taken everything from me before, and it’s continuing to take so much from me again. However, I cannot justify continuing to put myself through the literal torture of masking, putting my health at risk with more catatonic episodes, and the like. I know, it’s an extreme privilege to even start unmasking, yet I don’t feel like I have a choice, or even a say in the matter. The more days that go by, I’m losing the ability whether I like it or not. I’m not going through my “silly little unmasking journey”, I’m losing a vital skill that is made to protect autistic people against my will. And the more I fight against it, the more I’ll just cause myself harm. I cannot risk falling back into more catatonic episodes. I’m in college. I cannot risk that.

For all my autism catatonia baddies out there losing their ability to mask and in a complicated relationship with it, I see you, and you aren’t alone in this.

Autism Catatonia is so complicated, and I feel like the more I try and fit myself into the box that I used to be, the more harm I’m causing myself. So, here’s to a new chapter. A new chapter of accepting that I shouldn’t mask so I don’t have catatonia. A new chapter of accepting that I’m losing my masking skills again. A new chapter of being my autistic self again, and not worrying what other people think of me.

[utilitycaster]

RE: Ruidusborn superstition - It's weird because Matt has had several opportunities to make it about persecution and hasn't. Laura could've made it a stronger point in her backstory with Gelvaan and didn't. This rounding up Ruidusborn and throwing them in jail is a theoretical crime that a bad guy in a cult told them might happen. 

Dealing with the unfair persecution of non Vanguard Ruidusborn in the fallout of this could be interesting to explore, but a) it hasn’t happened yet and b) still entirely the fault of the Vanguard for, ya know, all the crime. I just don’t get why some folks aren’t exploring the actual interesting conflict in front of them (i.e. being tied to something inherently destructive, your parent using you as a justification for her crimes, etc.) and instead make it about some secret twist coming that will totally make Liliana and the Vanguard “correct” actually in order to (I assume?) justify Imogen’s brief consideration of them and dunk on Orym for having the audacity to not be objective about the organization that killed his family.

Hey anon,

This is a very good point re: the actual conflicts present. I know I've been guilty of going hard on Liliana and the thing is I do find her a profoundly compelling and sympathetic villain. I think she was placed in an impossible position by Predathos imbuing her with troubling and at times painful powers; that despite having good intentions with regards to the nature of Ruidus (there is a lot of value in both studying it and in concealing its nature, depending on your perspective) people other than Ludinus were unable to give her answers and so she was easy prey for his cult; and she has since been driven by these motivations so far down the road of the Ruby Vanguard that even when the daughter she has believed herself for so long to be protecting tries to give her an out and asks her why she's doing this, she can't answer but is terrified of leaving. She is very sympathetic. She is very much a villain. And yes, I'll cover Orym in a second.

The following is, by necessity due to the nature of what I want to discuss, going to touch on some real-world politics though mostly in the sense of abstract strategy with very few specific actual positions. I want to note that we are talking about a fictional work here, and while I do have some presumptions regarding the people advocating for the Vanguard, they are just that - presumptions. I will only say that if this is how the people advocating for the Vanguard engage with people in real-world activism (if they partake in that in the first place), this may be a revealing insight into why they are perhaps less than successful.

Every argument in favor of killing the gods ultimately presupposes killing the gods is correct. They are all, ultimately, either tautological (we should kill the gods because they are deserving of death) and assume that the only objective conclusion is "we should kill the gods", therefore anything other than "we should kill the gods" cannot be objective.

I may be repeating myself since I've said this a lot since the last episode but: there as a truly bone-chilling lack of empathy in thestatement that Orym needs to stop bringing up his dead family and get over it and be objective (read: agree with the premise that the gods should be killed). Actually, if you are a person capable of perceiving others as people, you will likely realize that it is cruel and absurd to expect someone to say "this group murdered my family, but because they did so with the correct motivations, I shall stop mentioning it." As you indicated, it's bizarre that Orym is expected to set the wholesale murder - deliberately set up with no hope of resurrection, just to twist the knife - aside, but Imogen is never expected to set aside the (let's face it, extremely tenuous, given that Liliana's been absent for over a quarter-century) feelings about her mother, a person who recruits child soldiers, turned Vax into an orb, and is a general in the death cult that murdered Orym's husband and father. Like, in a real-world scenario, someone in Orym's position very well might have just left over this. Your friends keep failing to consider your trauma? Perhaps it's time to, painful as it may be, find friends who will be sensitive. [I don't want to focus on the shipping or character dynamic aspects with that particularly argument against Orym, but this is a fictional work and I do think another running theme in all sorts of discourse is that you do not need to justify your ships as logical, and when you do, you really do sound like "why doesn't Ross, the largest friend, simply eat all the other friends." There are logical reasons why Orym might not want to talk with, for example, Fearne or Ashton; but also the heart wants what it wants, and again, if you aren't truly ignorant about the way human psychology works you have to acknowledge that.]

Before I move on to other items I want to note I've as of late seen attempts not just to discredit Orym but to pathologize his behavior as self-harming or moral OCD or a failure to get fully over grief (again, an expectation that is not just devoid of empathy but also sets the standard of 'get over grief' as "agrees with me") and not just "hey, this group killed my husband and father in front of me and I understandably will not budge on this particular front. So there's also a growing ableist push, here, because someone doesn't agree with you and will not agree with you and also might want to kiss someone different than whom you want them to kiss.

As of late, the banner of those wronged by the gods has shifted from any of Bells Hells to those of Aeor, and that is a bad sign in a D&D campaign. If you need to set aside the PCs in order to rely on NPCs who have not shown up in the current narrative? You are clinging to a melting iceberg, my man. (More so after invoking FCG as one of the victims of Aeor's demise, rather than someone created to be used for malicious purposes by Aeor; and even more so after they destroyed themself specifically in heroic sacrifice to save the rest of the party from a Vanguard general.). But more seriously, the focus on Aeor feels reminiscent of advocacy for the unborn; or, to take a page from my own personal experiences and move this back into a fandom realm, the way people will frequently more loudly decry antisemitism for depictions of goblins than for, say, the fact that I don't know of an American synagogue that hasn't experienced a bomb threat in the past 10 years. It's very easy to advocate for corpses or fetuses over the living, or for fictional characters over real people who might be less than perfect. Much easier to ensure they never do such inconvenient things as disagree with you or have their own suggestions or be complicated. It hearkens back to some of the conversations I and others had earlier this campaign about a denial of agency because by making characters victims "stripped of choice," (always that phrasing) suddenly they can't do wrong. They make for a shit story, but at least you can feel morally pure about your flavorless cardboard that ultimately means nothing in-world or out. (And if they don't have agency, that means your morality pet can't run away. Or blow themselves up in a stunning rejection of your argument.)

Returning to the Vanguard: an ongoing discussion in activist spaces (and internet ones as well) is that there's a weird ignorance of optics as an important factor in activism. I know it seems frustrating - why can't people just see that this cause is just - but optics have always been a crucial part of any successful movement. I mean, even if you do believe that we need to do more to combat climate change - and I do - my, and most people's response to the environmental activists who keep throwing soup or paint on artwork is "ugh, this again?" I mean, functionally, while the cause is far more just, it's not terribly distinct from the weird-ass He Gets Us ad campaign; most people are going to say "and you're doing this instead of anything helpful...why?" The Vanguard's optics SUCK. Sure, they've fomented some unrest, but it is an unfortunate truth that the vast majority of people will prefer the inherent violence of a stable system that they are used to over violent unrest. For a successful coup or radical change, either you need to strike at the seat of power extremely quickly or you need to show that you are the more, for lack of a better term, civilized option, and the Vanguard has failed utterly in both these. You're going to get a few places like Hearthdell (though, really, how long will that last given that they got rid of the temple without a scrap of help from Ludinus) but you're going to get a lot of places where city dwellers say "ugh, these stupid crystals are so fucking loud, could this motherfucker shut up" and you're also going to get no shortage of places that say "my family member was taken in by this cult" or "these guys murdered my professor". The rightness or wrongness of the Vanguard's politics aside, a lot of people in-world are likely to side with Orym - these people are murderers who disturb the peace and we should stop them. The cause is lost. Is it, in some absolute sense, fair that people will judge you more for how you convey a message than what the message is? No, although if you convey it in rivers of blood, then, perhaps, yes. But it is, fair or not, often true.

Which brings me back to Orym. I think the reason people are stooping so low specifically to malign and discredit Orym is because he brings all of the above uncomfortably to light. He's aligned with Keyleth, who quite frankly until pretty recently was, within the fandom, partly as (understandable) backlash to the hate she received, and partly because she was, if nothing else, always portrayed as someone deeply attuned to the human costs, treated as a morally infallible authority; and she is no friend to the gods yet still believes their demise is far too great a risk to take. Again, thinking of yourself as Exandria's equivalent of the man on the street (Imahara Joe the Plumber?), are you going to listen to "those people killed my husband and father to prove a hypothesis so that they could tether the moon?" or "my mom, who left me when I was two years old and never came back or sent a letter, is one of those people?" And that's assuming Imogen's even going to make that argument, which, as her actions indicate, she's probably not going to. But most of all I think they really don't like that Orym isn't backing down from "That is the blade that killed my father and husband. She is not right." He's kept to this story the entire time, while the positions of others have evolved. And he's telling the truth. Every time he says this, I think anyone who isn't actually a complete black hole of empathy must confront how much of their humanity they are supressing just to make a poorly-argued point about a D&D show and I'd imagine that can't make one feel very good.

I think people are terrified of Orym's conviction, because he has shown, time and time again, that he is not going to be swayed. I don't think, in fact, that he's going to be swayed by seeing Aeor, should that happen, since Aeor was destroyed a thousand years before he, Will, or Derrig were born, and their murders failed to undo that harm in any way. A really good way to turn people away from your cause, even if it's a good one, is killing those they love. And again, it's fine if you see that position as unfair, or ignorant, or even amoral. It's also extremely true. And I think people realize it's true, given that the only defenses I've seen for Liliana have been "well, but she's Imogen's mother" and "well, it's shockingly easy for people to fall into a cult, because this has happened to my family members." Clearly, we agree that people will place personal connections and the pain of those close to them over ideology. Orym's is just really inconvenient for some people, and so he must be discredited.

In the end: the people in the story who at every turn choose manipulation, indoctrination, violence, subjugation, and conquest are saying "This is the way; you just have to trust me." Is it any surprise most people watching the show are saying "No, I don't think I will"?

[louisa-gc]

how to bring less stuff into your home

don't buy if you already have something similar in function or form — for ex. i already own a pair of boots, therefore any new pair of boots, even if a different colour or a different shape, must stay in the store.

don't buy to store (unless it's on a good sale) — ex. i'm halfway through my favourite serum and already thinking of buying a new bottle, but i'll hold off until the previous one is actually empty, unless i see it in the store for much less than it usually costs. i also used to hoard notebooks and now try not to buy any more until all have been used up.

don't buy what you can reasonably rent or borrow — ex. i barely ever buy books because i can find everything i need at the library (including a ladder and a printer).

don't buy what you truly do not need — ex. did i get a rose quartz roller? yes. did i get it for a purpose? yes, to massage my sore jaw muscles. does it do what i bought it for? meh. is it nice to have? kind of. do i ever use it? not really. so was it a waste of natural resources, cheap labour and my own money? absolutely.

don't buy spontaneously — ex. i went to the store to buy a new bottle of shampoo but ended up with the rose quartz roller too. in the moment, i could easily justify the need for it and a friend even said to go for it (it wasn't expensive either!). now it sits in its box and i only remember to take it out every three months.

don't buy what is not on your shopping list — ex. i needed a new pair of black trousers, and had had them on my list for months already. i found the very best pair i could get on my budget, and going into the store i saw so many beautiful pieces, but kept telling myself i only came in for the black trousers. in the end i left the store with only what i needed, because i knew exactly what my mission there was.

don't buy what won't last — ex. i love to get myself a bouquet of eucalyptus branches every autumn and to let them dry out. i know i can keep those branches for at least a year. while i love fresh flowers too, i know they won't last long. (sometimes i get carnations though, because i know how to keep them going for a relatively long time.) same goes for sweaters: i do not buy acrylic and polyester, simply because i cannot de-pill them the way i can wool.

don't buy what other's have — ex. i've been dreaming of a rice cooker for a very long time, and especially now that many of my friends have gotten one, i can't seem to stop thinking about it. however i know my current kitchen just wouldn't have the space for it, so i stick to cooking my rice on the stove.

don't go into stores if you don't need anything and avoid aisles you don't need anything from — ex. i love this ecological store in town, it always smells earthy and pleasant and has beautiful things inside, but if i enter it without a real need for something, i know i will leave with at least a bar of ridiculously expensive chocolate i wasn't even craving. the same principle applies to online shops!

don't let social media or the people around you create new needs for you — ex. a lot of people on instagram and in my real life are knitting and i would love to do it too! i could easily justify getting all the tools and paying hundreds of euros for wool, but i know i reach for other activities in my free time and that my arms have hurt way too much when i've previously knitted, so it's not for me.

don't buy unnecessary amounts of things — ex. i recently moved to a very small studio. i've previously always had six of each type of plate, because kitchen things tend to be sold in packs of six. this time i just got three of each (three plates, three bowls, three mugs...) and it has been more than enough. i cannot even imagine having to store double the amount of stuff in my tiny kitchen!

[alpaca-clouds]

You cannot "kill" religion

I want to talk about one thing, that often gets lost.

A while ago I spoke about how even in a Solarpunk world, there would be religious diversity. Which is something I stand by and at least here there was not much in terms of arguments about it. Though I had a lot of arguments about it in other forums. Because... Well, religion is a sore topic for a lot of people. Which I understand. Of course I do. I was abused in the name of religion for most of my childhood and youth. So I get it. I had that time myself. The edgy atheist phase in my 20s, where I would get super angry about anything religious.

But by now I have calmed down a lot about it. I can see that religion is not inherently evil, even though it has been used to justify a lot of evil. And yes, that is true for most of the world religions at least.

It was that, that kept me on the anti-religion train for so long, really. Because being LGBTQ* I obviously am so easily the victim of all the evil justified by religion. But at some point I realized, that literally any frame of mind can be used for evil. Science has been used for lots of evil. And with that I do not just mean that science found ways to do evil, but that it has been used to justify evil. Science has been used to justify racism, sexism and eugenics.

Because the truth is, that humans who want to do evil will just find a tool to justify it.

No, but the thing I want to talk about here is this idea that if people were just all efficiently scientifically literate religion would just die out. Or, alternatively, the idea that we could just forbid religion in any way or form and it would be gone.

When it comes to the first thing, I would say: That is in fact an unscientific claim. To the second I would say: History wants to differ.

Let me make one thing clear: Our human brains are kinda just wired for religion. Our brains have just a couple of traits, that makes it likely for us to become religious or at least supersticious in one way or another.

Like the fact, that we are super wired for seeing someone else's intent. Because we are this super social animal species. But we got so good with this, that our brains kinda just see intent in anything. Like, we will look at those wire connected headphones knotted up and think: "Why are you doing this again?!" While of course the headphones are not intent on this. Because they are just things.

As such we have just a tendency to see a spirit or character in every object. Which is how spiritual believes arrive. Giving each tree, stone and animal some sort of spirit.

It is just what our brains do.

The other thing our brains are kinda hardwired for is pattern recognition. Which leads us to see patterns even if there are none. You hunted a deer and just after that it rained? Twice? Trice even? Oh boy, there is a pattern here. The gods give you rain for sacrificing that deer boy.

Just as we are hardwired to kinda associate "vibes" with objects or places based on what might have happened there. There is absolutely no reason to not live in a place where a murder had happened. But even some of the people who think themselves as super rational will just not... want that.

And we see this going on. While scientists are less likely to be religious than the general populus, there is still a plenthora of religious scientists. Who are not worse scientists because of it. Because here is the other thing: Religion give us something to hold onto.

To believe in a higher power who has a plan for you is soothing to many. Just as it is soothing to believe that dead souls move onto something after death. Both because it helps us deal with the idea of dying one day, but also when it comes to dealing with the death of loved ones.

And that is... okay. Really. In by itself it is okay.

And then there is the history of course. See, I decided to put a Torii up there, because oh boy, the Buddhist folks trying to get the religion to spread in Japan tried a lot to suppress the indigenous believes, that later turned into Shinto. And... Well, they did not manage, did they?

But the same can be said for so many other religions. Be it how the Christians stayed around through Roman persecution. Or how there are still Jewish people, even though they have been persecuted for literal millennia.

Even some of those religions we consider extinct are not really. They have just changed and merged into other religions, that have come along.

I mean, just as the Romans tried to get those Christians to stop being Christians, the Christians in turn tried to extinguish so, so, sooooooo many other religions. But it turns out that a lot of them are still around. At times somehow merged into Christianity. But... They are still there.

And really... I do think hating on religion as a general concept is just a wasted emotional effort. You do not need to believe all of those religious things. But... You will not forbid it. So the constructive thing would be to try and find a way to shift religion in a way, that people who believe it are less likely to fall for people preaching hate. To teach people to be able to read those scriptures in context and be critical of those using it to inspire hate.

[milquetoastmews]

okay I’ve seen you posting about wuthering heights and this is your invitation (if you want one) to yap and share your thoughts about it. i read it a few years back and i honestly… despised it? and i feel like i’m missing something bc like. i regularly read classics. i love engaging with a story’s themes. but something just didn’t click for me, and i’m left feeling bewildered about why people love it. and none of this is judgement on you, i just genuinely feel like i’m missing something, so if you want to yap about it please enlighten me 🖤

so sorry it took me 4evr to respond 2 this omfg

I am literally never not in the mood to talk about wuthering heights!!!!

first things first, I read it over 3 yrs ago so I don't remember allllll the specifics (tho I have been feeling the itch to reread it......)

but from what I can remember (!) here's what I love abt it:

its so immersive! at least, it was for me. I had honestly forgotten that these things had even happened specifically, but I went back and read my goodreads review of it and I mention dreaming about the story and how after I finished it I sat on my bed for an hour doing absolutely nothing, because what was I meant to do? the world I had been living in had just dissipated before my eyes. I had trouble moving on after finishing wuthering heights; I would want to read but couldn't bring myself to pick up another book because that meant fully exiting its world. even though I don’t remember the contents of the dream or sitting on my bed, the feeling I had when reading wuthering heights still comes back to me whenever I think/talk abt it. its hard to put a finger on exactly what that feeling is but I can very distinctly identify it as wuthering heights.

its just so gothic. I lovelovelove gothicism. I love that wuthering heights is gothic in every possible way. theres ghosts and haunted manors and impassioned declarations and tragic ends and violent displays of love (more on this in the next point)

ever since I had to read love in the time of cholera for my sr yr english class I've been kind of obsessed with the concept of love as a violence. not violence used to desecrate love, but violence as an expression of love itself (probably also why I love hannibal lol). as aforementioned, I'm fascinated w the macabre of life. its just so interesting to see how many horrible actions can be not excused, but genuinely explained by love. love as a source of madness, desperation, desolation will always be one of my fav things to see in media

its not an unrequited love story with heathcliff the incel "nice guys always finish last" character. catherine and heathcliff truly truly love each other. but they r both in tricky spots. heathcliff is a person of color with a diminished social standing and catherine is a woman. these both hinder their options in life. I like that love does not conquer all and they don't end up together and heathcliff goes literally batshit bcos of it (kinda ties into my last point). the love is requited it just... can't be

everyone sucks!!!!! absolutely nothing means more to me than characters that fucking suck. like fr. every character is so different and yet exactly the same in the sense that you cannot morally justify liking one over the other. they are all, objectively, bad people, but at times u can't help but wish something good would happen to them, if only to find out if they would be better were their circumstances more favorable (they wouldn't ofc; most of the time, they just ruin whatever good thing even gets w in their vicinity)

I found the framing rlly interesting, the whole story w in a story thing. the end of the book was established at the beginning (or at least that's the assumption): lockwood comes to the grange and visits the heights and sees that everyone is miserable. so, the story begins: nelly is going to enlighten him as to how everyone at the heights came to be so rude and forlorn. but, that wasn't the end and I liked that. to me, it felt like brontë gave us a map at the beginning of the story and said "you're going to end up here" but once we got to that point, she just kept going. I think that strikes a rlly optimal balance of both direction and surprise. tbh I just rlly admire emily brontë as a writer

I believe thats all I can think of for now? I def have more to say on how, yes, everyone sucks, but the characters r still complex and the historical context surrounding when the book was written and the social commentary that comes along w heathcliff's identity and all that but I'm tired and feel bad its taken me this long to respond anyway!!! but def lmk what fell flat 4 u, I'm always curious to learn other ppls perspectives on books

(also I for sure did not edit or read this over b4 posting so sorry if it is absolutely incomprehensible)

[aliciavance4228]

I Hate Lore Olympus (Sorry Not Sorry)

Note: I know that "hate" is a big word and that "dislike" is more fitting. But I never thought that I would ever encounter a comic that is so bad from its very beginning, so I have all the right to use it.

I remember that back when I was around 13 I heard for the very first time about Lore Olympus. I was already into Greek Mythology back then, but I hesistated reading/watching Lore Olympus and I remember myself abandoning it exactly in the middle of episode 10.

So I'm going to talk here about every little aspect that I didn't like about it and made me willing to abandon it so far.

The Colors

Look, I know that associating each god with a specific color based either on their role or personality isn't a new idea; we already see that in Disney's Hercules. At first I was like: "That must be interesting. I mean, it’s an easy way to distinguish each one of them, right?" But then I realized that the main reason why the creator chose to do that in the first place was because she wasn't too good at drawing. There are panels in which the characters are looking normal, and others in which they don’t look like themselves. The only thing that indicates you that yes, this is [Insert Name], is purely their color.

Also, I do not like the choice of color for many characters as well. For instace, the only reason why I believe that Hades is blue and Persephone is pink is because of the "boys=blue; girls=pink" stereotype. Also, why are Zeus and Poseidon purple and green, respectively? For me, it would've made more sense if Zeus was either white or golden and if Poseidon was the blue one. For Hades I think that either black (mortuary color), purple (associated with the riches) or at least a shade of grey would've been a better choice. As for Persephone, I think that ivy, teal, liliac and indigo would've all been better options.

Oh, and... why is Minthe red? Judging by her pointy years the creator wanted to make her look like some sort of a she-devil instead of a nymph. Mint green would've been a better color choice for her.

The Art Style on its own

This is a very subjective opinion, but I don't like this way too colorful, cartoonish design. I quess I'm just way too used of Seinen and Josei, lol.

On a serious note though, back when I was 6 I literally had a fairy tale book full of graphic/explicit illustrations. Inside the "Bluebeard" chapter there was literally an image with all of Bluebeard's previous wives beheaded, tied and thrown into a pool of blood. Not a very long time ago we used to tell our kids stories about cannibalism and child abandonment (looking at you, Hansel and Gretel!), because children are capable enough to understand that life isn't just rainbows and love and that bad thing are happening too. Are you really going to tell me that a pre-teen cannot read a comic series unless it's extremely colored and looks like something made by Disney?!

Minthe

You could've made Minthe either Hades' ex or a girl who tried to seduce him while knowing that he is already in a relationship. In these cases I would understand why you would choose to villainize her and turn her into the Big Bad Guy. But the fact that she and Hades were already in a relationship and he was willing to have an affair with another woman without any hesitation justifies her anger completely, anyone would be angry if they would know that their partner is cheating on them. The choice of making Persephone the mistress instead of her and then acting as if Minthe was in fact the bitch all this time is horrible.

Persephone

I want to know:

Why does she look and act like a child? Just because she was initially an "innocent flower girl" or something like that before she was kidnapped in the original myths that doesn’t mean that she has to act straight up like an infant. This kinda reminds of some sort of a Betty Boop situation: she's basically a character with the head of a child put on the body of a grown sexy woman; which not only that makes men thirsty over her, but helps them to easily manipulate her as well.

And look, I know that Homer is partly to be blamed for this as well: he describes her as trim-ankled and buxom all the time, so in this case it's alright to criticize the poet for the amount of unnecessary fanservice. Don't take this part too seriously.

Why is she only 19 whereas Hades is 2000+? Look, I know that even in the original Greek Mythology there is a generational gap between Hades and Persephone, but you could've made her at least a few centuries older. Was it that hard?! In this comic Hades is both physically and mentally WAY older than her, which instantly makes this relationship creepier than in the original myths. What is next, making her a minor?!

Why is she this little cupcake uncapable of doing anything wrong? Give me a complex character as a protagonist, not a Mary Sue. I understand that you wanted a compassionate and emphatic Persephone, but you know that just because someone is nice that doesn’t mean that they're automatically naïve or stupid, nor that they cannot have layers, right?

Hades

Look, I know that for a significant amount of time Hades was considered the equivalent of Satan and by extension depicted as evil by the Christian Hollywood. But just because he wasn't the devil that doesn’t mean that he automatically was this innocent shy awkard cute saint that never does anything wrong and should be raised in glory. You could've at least give him a dark and dour personality: make him morbid, brooding, sarcastic, surly, insufferable... I don't know, just anything. Besides, I don't like how the narrative acts as if he has no fault at all, when it's quite obivious not only that he cheated on Minthe, but that both of them are toxic and abusive in this relationship, not only her.

Ah, and... he's a creep. He's more of a creep here than in the original Greek Myths, and he's literally kidnapping her there. It's very obivious that he likes Persephone only for her body and nothing else. Even Plato wrote: "This is the reason why Haides, who is wise, consorts with her [Persephone], because she is wise." once.

Remember that moment from episode 8 when she asks him to help her with her hair, and he not only that immediately assumes that she wants to have sex with him, but also tells her that they can do that in the kitchen but to be careful because he has loud neighbors or something like that? That was straight up disgusting in my honest opinion and not exactly something that the ultimate gentleman this narrative presents him as would say.

Demeter

I vaguely remember one moment when Demeter shows Persephone a greenhouse or something like that, which turns out to be a cage. I can't tell for the moment if it was a dream or something that actually happened, but depicting Demeter as an overbearing mother is an instant big no for me. If anyone dares to demonize her just because they ship Hades and Persephone then I invite them to sleep in my trash can, no discussion.

Aphrodite

I just want to know why is Persephone more beautiful than the Goddess of Beauty. You cannot make the Goddess of Beauty less attractive than your MC, just because all the focus is on her.

Overall, I am very glad that I didn't continue it, and that because, from what I heard, things are becoming creepier and creepier with each chapter, and the entire comic is an insult to Greek Mythology (I can tell).

[ofmermaidstories]

(This is all about ''Something (just like this'' :], i apolagize in advance)

Theres an auther (you, i'm thinking of you) that has given sutch weight to the simple human pains everyone has, let them cary a greaf in every breath they're mentioned, i can't help but ache with the mc as one because i get it, i understand and even if i handn't felt the same pain that crushes your hope of ever being loved in the same way you do, if i hadn't though myself cynical and bitter the way she does i still think i'd get it.

I still think i'd be able to see myself cradle my heart like an infant, even though it's an old ugly, terrable creature.

The plots so ritch it's unbalivable that i get to read your works for free, like i knew it was her bestfried the second our artist glaced over her sholder and saw her drawing kids with guns in masks. But it was her best-fucking-fried, who dies without answering her livid questioning.

It's her constant self awair bitternes to the person she is that just-

Chefs fucking kiss.

Like the way she views herself and everyone else she thinks threatens the few things she sees as good in her with a sort of cynicalnes, but through herself that is bloody perfect.

Shes insane for the shit she pulls, Gods i love her.

I cannot expres enough of my love for the way you craft your words, the story and the way you put so mutch care into it makes me ill.

Izuku is caprured so well, his whole being being intertwined with Katsukies-....i am going feral as we speak.

Also her being an artist so acuretly presented, it's insane, the way she is about her skill, her talents, her works and her instuments and the way there are these little moments she wants to capture is so stupidly accurate to how i see the world as a creative. Always hungry and always craving to make, even when im no where near a peace of paper or even the shittiest of pens.

Im grinning and in fucking tears. (As i was writing all of this in my notes i wasn t even that far into the last chapter.)

Holy fuck, god i fucking despise Hana. And i get why, and im amazed at how her resoning, her pain and anger dosn't justify(?) shit when i've seen a lot of things where someones inhumane actions get swept under the rug cus they were hurting quietly, or something.

She was like a quirk nazi. Nothing redeams(?) that, y'know?

Auther i am shaking you by the sholders, and im sorry if my nails dig in too deep but holy fuck. Breathings hard, fic so good my rib cage has started to feel too small for my heart, and my lungs, and the hole your story has carved inbetween all of it.

Fic so good i haven't even gotten to the end and i want to thank you for, for all this has done to me. I'm shit with fics where there are a lot of words, no matter how mutch i love the characters and yet, and yet somehow this is one of the 100k + fanfics i have enjoyed every gut wrenching second of.

I feel like vomiting

In fact

I might.

They all need therapy after this, methinks.

(I know this is long and loopy, and my english (my second language) is not great, and that ultametly i kinda said nothing but i needed you to see (at least a little bit of) how insanely wonderful your craft is)

Anywho, i still haven't finished, and that was a lot of words, but i hope you have a lovely 24 h, i wish you the best with all of your future works. "Something (just like this)" has...given me brain damadge i'm guessing.

Blue, there is nothing to apologise for, I think you are wonderful. 🥺 You said everything. 🥺 From this message alone—from you taking the time to write it, and send it, I can tell you that there’s nothing about your heart that’s old or ugly or terrible. If anything, I think it’s golden—like the afternoon sun, reflecting all that good light back until it’s too much to hold. 🥹🫀✨

But okay, lemme try and do the thoughtfulness of this ask some justice. 🥹💕 God, to be honest I kinda worried about Hana, and her place in the story. Like—knowing how it was going to end. I think a lot of us will end up parting ways with people in our life that were important—and some, unfortunately, for ugly reasons. Hana’s betrayal is like, so extreme, so dramatic and terrible. And it doesn’t just hurt Reader, it hurt other people, kids. Like sure, Hana was hurt—but then she turned around and hurt others, willingly. And there’s no justice for the ones she directly affects. You’re right, Blue. You can’t redeem that—you can only pick up the pieces around it.

Tbh, I think Reader’s bitterness would’ve made building a life after it all that much harder, if it weren’t for other people. 🥹 Like—Scribbles cynical nature was such a fun part of writing the fic, lmao, and it absolutely would’ve made life that much harder for her in the aftermath if she didn’t have support. 🥹 I think someone like Scribbles, who barely trusts themselves, was a good match/contrast for Izuku who—like, even in canon is learning to overcome the worst of his most fear-driven habits. It gives him the ability to see Scribbles in a way that—that she needed. 🥺

Bluey!!! You’re an artist too??? Like our Reader. 🥹 The need to document everything is so real lmao. Like—it’s constant!! An insatiable way of looking at the world. 🥹 How do I capture this, how can I do this. I literally just had that feeling the other night, driving home under a perfectly straight trail of cloud like a comet’s tail. The sky was that perfect, indigo glow, and there was a single star alongside of it and it genuinely looked like the trail of a meteorite streaking over the sky and I wanted to remember everything about it. I wanted to draw it, write it, anything to keep it.

Blue, you have said so many kind things about my writing. 🥺 Either in this ask or in the tags of other things. And!!! It means so much to me, every time. 🥺 This is what I mean when I say you have a reflective, golden heart. 🥹💛🌿 I’m always going to be glad that like, I could write something that made you wanna reach out and say hello, lmao, but mostly I’m just glad you’re here. ☀️

(Also, as an aside—you mentioned a song, in the tags of one post a little while ago. I wanted you to know that I immediately ran to spotify to try and find it, lmao, and listen to it and like, now it lives in my likes and every time I listen to it I think of you and also of maybe trying to write a Bakugou worthy of the association, lmao. It’s such a sweet song, Blue, thank-you for the new music 🌷)

[noxxytocin]

20 Questions for Fic Writers Tag ✍️

Thank you for the tag @myokk 🫰✨ This looks fun!

How many works do you have on AO3? 4 public and 1 anon!

What's your total AO3 word count? 18,969 words (public)

What fandoms do you write for? For now, I'm focused on Hogwarts Legacy. But I do have some pretty intense ships in other shows, like Stranger Things, so I might dip my quill into those at some point.

Top five fics by kudos? My most popular fic by kudos is Bury. It’s quite amusing because I knocked it out in one night after a few drinks and some seriously intense feelings. It’s my least polished piece, which just goes to show that AO3 readers are all about those spicy, quick reads and I love that, haha.

Do you respond to comments? Absolutely! Every comment notification makes my heart a bit brighter, so I reply to them with as much warmth as I put into my fics.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I don't think any of my stories end on an angsty note—I'm more of a fluff enthusiast.

What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Perhaps, Insomnium.

Do you get hate on fics? I don't believe I receive enough attention for that to be a concern. However, I do review all comments before they are posted for this very reason, so that I may block any unwanted individuals, if necessary.

Do you write smut? Yes, but in a very delicate, poetic manner. Smut, to me, possesses a certain elegance.

Craziest crossover? None.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge, though I do believe I have inspired some writings. I don’t particularly mind if I encounter similar works after mine has been published. Writing is meant to be an inspiring endeavor, and that is precisely the purpose of inspiration.

Have you ever had a fic translated? I have a close, French mutual who helps me double-check my French in my fanfics, and I know a decent amount.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Well, my husband provides me with a great many ideas for the fics I’ve written, so I would certainly count his contributions. He is an excellent beta reader!

All time favorite ship? I couldn't possibly choose that...I have so many ships. I don't believe I have a favorite; they all occupy equal space in my mind.

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? None, I am confident that I will finish all of mine in time. I've just been busy!

What are your writing strengths? Transforming risqué themes into romantic fluff is my specialty. I can take a rather smutty idea and turn it into tooth-rotting fluff. It’s more of a curse than a strength, really, haha...I also enjoy crafting dialogue and capturing the canonical personalities of characters. When writing Sebinis, I make a point of watching extensive videos of their lines to accurately capture their mannerisms and language.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language? It’s fine as long as it is executed properly. A minor mistake is forgivable, but it genuinely irritates me when I encounter French in other fics that is clearly incorrect, especially when the writer or beta says that French is their first language, yet this is not evident in their sentences. My French beta mutual has even remarked, “Yeah, no, they're lying” It drives me mad, as I am certain this beta is deceiving the poor author, and yet I cannot address it myself. It is not my place, and I am well aware that it would only result in the individual defensively justifying their lies. Hopefully they will find out eventually...

First fandom you wrote in? First ever?....hmm....I am honestly not sure...maybe (cringe) homestuck??? But that was in 2011 or 2012, hahaha...

Favorite fic you've written? One that I am currently doing for Sebinis...but I can't share because it's for an anon writing fest!

Surprise - no 20th question! 🫴✨ Tagging: @luminousecho @the-invisibility-bloke @shyinsunlight @steve-black-hl @moltenwrites @the-golden-comet @the-letterbox-archives @mirdeli @esolean @gaunts-angel @jamiemoonymark @crime-in-progress