#I can't wait for it to come out in a few days

[stalkedbytrains]

[Behold! More! As requested by a lovely person on my kofi]

It had been a weird week if you're being perfectly honest.

Your usual bread guy was held hostage by one of the new weird upstart villain that has been bucking the trend of signing up with the Villain Union, so you didn't have the good sourdough for a few days. Which would have been fine if you had the time to make it yourself but you haven't had the time. And honestly your sourdough isn't nearly as good as Jesse's.

Fearsome Night has been coming in as something of a weird regular. He's... not subtle.

And you don't want to cast aspersions on anyone, especially a super villain. But like... he came in whatever he considers his non-villain persona to scout the place, and it was clear that he was a super villain.

He might as well have had the newspaper with the eyes cut out for as subtle as he was being in your shop.

Still ordered the Equinox and chips.

And, again, he was extremely not subtle, since someone in front of him ordered the Fearsome Night with "extra fearsome" he let out a loud whoop that he utterly failed as disguising as a cough.

If you didn't know any better, you'd suspect that he was waiting to see if Equinox would come in and order from you.

He didn't, at least not while Fearsome was lurking around.

Adrienne Moore did come in and get a double Vestige on rye though. The entire shop went eerily silent as you made the sandwich. She was intimidating as hell. And it was interesting to see Fearsome make eye contact and not react or do anything to notorious rule breaking hero.

You could have sworn there was some recognition there.

No one in the shop dare commented on her ordering the sandwich named after her infamous villain mother.

At least Adrienne tipped super well. Always did.

Eventually Fearsome Night didn't come in for a few days, and you were honestly a little grateful. This weird energy he was bringing in was not making for a healthy working environment and you don't know how chummy you want to get with a super villain.

Finally at the end of the week, you were close to finishing up for the night. You needed to bag up the last of the day old bread to take to the local homeless shelter, mop, and then lock up.

The bell over the door rang and in walked Equinox of all people.

You tried to bite your tongue, you really did, but you hadn't managed to fully leave 'customer service' mode yet.

"Hey there, haven't seen you in a little bit. You good?"

You shouldn't have asked. You shouldn't have opened that door.

Very rarely will someone see the opening created by small talk and just answer honestly. It's always off-putting.

"Yeah, been busy. You know, the job," they say as they gesture to their elaborate costume.

You nod politely. "Usual?" you ask to try and shift the subject but somehow you know that it isn't going to work.

"Yeah, Fearsome Night on sourdough."

You grimace. "Out of sourdough this week. Sorry. My guy got held hostage by Siege Works or whatever that new guy was that took over the library. He's taking some time off to recover and stuff."

"Damn that villain! He can't stop until he ruins everything he touches!"

"Sorry. I can do any of the other usual breads."

"Fine, can I get it with rye then?"

"Sure," you mutter and try to distract yourself with the sandwich crafting.

"Yeah I was going to come in," Equinox says to fill the dead air, "but I saw Fearsome Night was here. So I thought it would be awkward if I ordered his sandwich in front of him."

"Yeah... he's been something of a regular this week. He's ordered like 12 sandwiches from me this week."

"Really? Do I want to ask?"

You plead, beg, silently, that they don't ask what you know they are going to ask.

"What sandwich does he get?"

You look up from the mostly completed sandwich. You hope that your look is conveying enough sad pleading to get them to relent the question. You don't want to be in the middle of this. It's so weird. It's awkward.

But they don't relent.

"He's a vegetarian apparently so he gets and Equinox. Anyways! Here's your," you say. As you hand them the sandwich and start to say the name outloud when who should bust in, causing the bell over your door to dance and happy little jingle.

"Fearsome Night," all three of you say at the same time. No one else adds the "on rye" but you do.

"I KNEW IT!" he shouts.

"Don't read into this! They make a great sandwich!" Equinox says, trying to defend themself.

"Yes I do," you say at the same time that Fearsome Night says, "Yes they do!"

"YOU LIKE ME! I mean... YOU LIKE MY SANDWICH!" Fearsome Night declares.

"We're closing soon. I have to mop," you say, but no one is paying attention.

"That doesn't mean anything! Don't you dare think any more of this!" Equinox counters.

"It's going to be eight dollars. Here's your chips."

"HA! YOU EVEN LIKE BARBECUE CHIPS! THE MOST SUPERIOR CHIP FLAVOR!"

"What does that even have to do with anything?" Equinox counters.

"It doesn't," you mutter, even though neither of them is paying attention to you.

"IT HAS EVERYTHING TO DO WITH!"

"TO DO WITH WHAT?"

"I KNEW THERE WAS SOME SEXY KIND OF SPARK HERE! WHEN WE FOUGHT BY THE LIGHT HOUSE LAST YEAR!"

"WHY DO YOU ALWAYS SHOUT?"

"STOP DEFLECTING THE QUESTION!"

"Mister Fearsome Night," you try to interject and get nowhere.

"You are insufferable!" Equinox says.

"You like it!" Fearsome Night counters.

"GUYS!" you finally shout. They turn to you as if they just now realized that you were still there. "I'm closing shop now. Here's your Equinox and chips. Here's your Fearsome Night and chips. This is on the house. Now please leave."

"I DID NOT ORDER A SANDWICH!"

"I KNOW!" you shout back. "But now you don't have an excuse to not sit and eat together. There's a nice secluded little park a block north. Now I really have to mop so I can go home and shower!"

"OH! Uh... thank you," Fearsome Night said awkwardly.

Equinox took their own sandwich with some reluctance and a little shame, like they had just gotten caught doing something embarrassing.

"Thank you," they muttered.

"Yes, yes, you're welcome, now please, please leave. And I swear if you ever do this kind of thing in my shop again I will ban both of you from ever returning. And you may be thinking 'oh this cute and very talented sandwich maker can't ban a super villain and super hero from their shop who do they think they are to challenge us?' I want to remind you that I have a standing order for Mariana and their whole entourage. And Dayline comes in every Sunday for a coffee and a breakfast sandwich. If you want me telling my best costumers why they might not be getting their stuff, try me."

Suddenly both supers were very humble.

"Thank you," they both say quietly.

"Go. Eat. I'll see you later," you say as you push them fully out the door.

The bell jingles as the door settles into it's closed position.

You turn the lock, and flip the open sign to closed. The last thing you hear is, "I guess we should go to the park?"

"I HEAR IT IS LOVELY THIS TIME OF NIGHT!"

You own a sandwich shop in the heart of a superhero city. After gaining customers by making sandwiches based on heroes, you decided to try making some based on villains. Today, a villain stopped to review theirs.

[ninikrumbs]

fluff with boyfriend satoru. thats it.

boyfriendsatoru who's weary and exhausted from the weight of the world on his shoulders, fighting curses day in and day out.

boyfriendsatoru who's favorite part of the day is coming home to you, to the soft hum of your cozy apartment. Your warm smile and open arms a perfect remedy to melt away the exhaustion in his bones, along with the smell of a freshly made meal or takeout depending on how tired you were from your own missions.

"Welcome home, Toru!" The tender tone in your voice made his heart warm. Despite your tired eyes, you still stood up to greet him by the door. You wear wearing his shirt and nothing else with your hair up in a messy bun. And to him you looked so beautiful it almost hurt. How did he ever deserve you?

He closes the distance between you two, wrapping his arms around your smaller frame, hugging you tightly like someone was gonna take you away.

Tucking his head in the crook of your neck, he breathes you in and melts into your embrace. "Im home."

boyfriendsatoru who's house is now so full of life ever since you came in the picture, apartment now filled with cute trinkets, scented candles, plants and cozy throw pillows. A stark difference from his once cold and empty house that he only uses to sleep for a few hours before carrying the mantle as the storngest once more.

boyfriendsatoru who makes up for his absence due to long missions every chance he gets. He now demands for days off like other sorcerers and spends those days trailing behind you like a little puppy.

boyfriendsatoru who doesn't know what personal space is when it comes to you. Wanna shower? he's right there with you. Reading a book in bed? his using your chest as a pillow, purring like a cat every time your laugh reverberates from your body, might even offer to reenact your favorite scenes. Need to pee in the middle of the night? You get startled when he opens the door, sleepy face yawning as he scratches his toned tummy while he waits for you to be finished. Claiming that he can't sleep without you. Doing skincare? He's right beside you, waiting for you to pat in your toner and moisturiser on his face. Honestly, he's just a baby who loves you and wants to be included in everything.

"Toru, not that I mind..."

He looks up from his place on your chest, looking so sleepy and satisfied that you almost didn't wanna disturb him.

He yawns before answering you, voice laced with sleep. "What is it, sweets?"

You thread your fingers through his fluffy hair, giving him head scratches here and there and he basically purrs like a kitty on catnip. "You know you don't t have to spend every waking moment with me. I know you feel like you have to make up for the time we're apart, but its okay to make time for yourself you know."

In typical Gojo fashion, Satoru juts his lips out as his eyes water comically. "Does that mean you don't want to spend time me?"

"What? No!" You were somehow panicked and amused at the same time.

"You should've just shot me instead, that would have hurt less!" He cries, tightening his arms around your waist.

You shake your head at his theatrics, laughing fondly, "I didn't mean that you big baby."

Sparkly blue eyes stare back at you, "But Im your baby."

You snort in response. If only the world could see him now, the stongest so soft like this. But truly you felt lucky that monly you could see this side to Satoru. A side to him that you could keep all to yourself. The world can have the strongest, you only ever wanted Satoru. "Toru, I only meant that you might get tired of me if you don't have your personal space."

He scoffs, looking so offended. "First of all, there's absolutely no chance of me getting sick of you and second Ive had enough alone time to last me a life time."

The way he said the last part made it sound like it was no big deal but the thought of him coming home to an empy house with no one to turn to made your heart ache. "Toru.."

Seeing the look on your face, he quickly gives you a smile, "Don't look at me like that, sweets. Im fine, really. Its all in the past."

You were unconvinced but you didn't want to breach deeper into such a sad subject so instead you made a promise to yourself to make sure he never feels alone ever again.

You pull him up and wrap your arms around his neck, he snuggles into you but makes sure not to crush you under his weight. His warmth seeps into your skin as you caress his back. You murmur softly into his neck, "You have me, Toru. Always."

Gojo had to blink back the tears and stop his voice from shaking when he spoke, "And you have me."

--

"Just to be clear, you don't like personal space?" You ask, teasing lightly as you looked down at Gojo on you lap.

He gazes up at you, arms circling your waist, smirking cheekily as he answers, "I like your personal space."

[bunny-jpeg]

playback

toto wolff

tags: smut/pwp, onlyfans au, naughty live streams, age gap (late-20s/50s), big dick!toto, masturbation, dirty talking, daddy kink, master's student!reader

a/n: toto would do great in porn

you knew you needed to get laid soon. but, with your cramped schedule in your final semesters of your master's program. you were so close to finishing your program and getting the hell out of school and into your field!

but people have needs, and you needed to get your release somehow. you weren't on the hunt for a sexual partner, hell, not even a romantic partner. so you had a little subscription, to a website where you could gaze at handsome men and help get that release you so desire. you had a particular taste for the accounts you subscribed to.

older, taller, domineering and more than happy to spill the degrading language you've ever heard. - and while most came close, one man in particular fit the bill 'torger', mostly known as 'daddy'. you only found out his 'name' by an accidental search online - but that information had been basically scrubbed off the internet since you found it. but he preferred to be called daddy or sir. so that piece of information was locked away as you found his account on a lonely monday night.

his page was simple, the design was clean. everything as organized to a t which made something to watch tonight very easy. you were interested in the newest video, posted only hours earlier. the idea that he was filming and posting while you were holed up in the library trying to piece together evidence for your thesis! it was hot.

you clicked the video and got yourself comfortable with your phone. your hand between your legs. your pussy felt hot, most likely do to the arousal you had been carrying since you got back to your crummy little apartment. you gave a few teasing rubs as the video started.

you didn't actually know what daddy looked like. you've see his naked body, that was what you paid eleven dollars a month for. but you had never seen his face. it made sense that he wanted to protect his identity, but underneath the simple mask he wore, you wonder what he looked like.

he was seated back in bed, the camera pointed on his cock as he said, "about time you had come home, angel." his voice was accented, you weren't particularly good with where it was from. but his voice was low enough that it felt like he was right in your ear as you started to pleasure yourself. his voice was like honey on your sexual frustrated brain.

"i missed you today, my darling. you know how daddy feels about you going out all by yourself." he continued to masturbate himself. a low concept video, but it did wonders for you. "you know that you want to be good for daddy, right? did you behave, follow our rules?"

you swallowed and kept your hand moving. you rubbed the side of your hand up against your clit as you felt the splash of warmth across your face. you couldn't help it, his words got to you. they turned you on.

"angel." his favourite nickname for those who watched his videos. you running assumption was it was gender neutral enough to get anyone aroused. and you were no exception, "did you eat? get enough sleep? you're not falling behind are you? you know daddy holds you in high expectation, you don't want to fail me, do you?" his breathing was heavy in a way that was erotic, you felt the tingle in your toes as you started to move your hand faster.

the stimulation to your clit made you tense up as the sparks of pleasure danced in the back of your head. your eyes were locked on the video, next time you'd watch something this award-worthy on your laptop. see every inch of daddy's cock.

he exhaled deeply, "i bet you have, you know exactly what you have to do day by day. and that's why i'm so proud of you. but, all day i was thinking about you. i thought about your pretty ass on me. i know you'd let me take you apart in our bedroom. i wanted to wait for you to suck me off, but when i think of you i simply can't help myself."

you let out a small moan. you saw how he was stroking his cock. every so often he changed up the pace, which only made him more aroused. his blunt tip was leaky pre-cum, with his own sexual want. it was all a fantasy, but your aroused brain near drooled from the sight of his cock.

he once measured it for a photo and you saw loud and clear that it was a little over eight inches and thick enough to do damage if used incorrectly. but he seemed like the type to make sure his partner's came first. you had seen his collaborative work with other. usually a younger partner to come in and suck him off while filmed. even that was hot too, because it made you yearn to be in the woman's position. taken apart like that, fucked until bruising.

"will you be good for me, angel?" he asked near out of breath, "will you get on your knees for daddy and apologize for being out so late. you know i need to know if any infractions were done. if you were bad and we'll take it from there. i'll even let you pick out your punishment. but i have a feeling you were good for me. so i won't choke you on my cock. i know that gag reflex of you is so shallow, but maybe when we take our vacation i can properly train your throat. about time you learn to take what's yours." his breathing was staggered as more pre-cum dribbled out of his hard cock.

you continued to pleasure yourself, it only mounted in your body the more you played with yourself. you never knew that someone's words, some stranger's words, could turn you on so much. to make you cunt soaked with the idea of sucking his cock. of being good for him, a listening, obedient little thing. it ran heat through you.

"i want you, angel." he said softly, "i want you so badly. you have no idea what kind of man you make me. i become a beast when i am with you. everything about you, you're irresistible." he changed the pace of his movements as he pleasured himself.

you moaned a little louder at the video. you felt your toes curl and your calves tense up as you worked your hand across your sex. the pleasure was intense in a way that it made you near dizzy. you loved it, the feeling was intense in a way that drove you near the verge of insanity. his type of videos worked themselves into your little routine, his caring yet domineering tone. how he spoke to the camera, it only fueled the need to touch yourself.

"so good for me." he said lowly, "look at how much you've done. daddy believes in you, so why don't you try to take him all tonight. you know it won't bite." he chuckled which only made your heart rate pick up.

soon your climax hit and it was like being hit in the gut. you tensed up and came with a sharp noise that exited your lips. it felt amazing. you laid there with your hand still up against your clit as toto continued to masturbate. his words filthy yet supportive, it was a cocktail that turned you on even after you came.

"my angel." he purred, "i'm cumming to thoughts of you." you looked at the screen, his hand tightened around his cock. you could see the tattoo of the moon he had on his wrist. you've seen his cum all over that too before and it was quite the sight. he said quietly, "my sweet, sweet angel." before he came all over his hand which excited you.

his breathing was heavy pants as were yours. the video soon ended and you laid out in the glow of your phone screen as you laid there heavily breathing. your heart was pounding as you tried to regain some semblance of stability.

you thought of his tattoo and that large hand around your throat. it didn't hurt that you were able to get a second round to thoughts of torger fucking you.

-

you were asked to attend a guest lecture in your program. it was suggested by a friend as something free to do on a tuesday morning. the lecture hall was sparsely occupied. you and your friend sat near the front and the guest professor was already there.

older, taller - your friend remarked, "probably get a packed house just to catch a glimpse of him." then giggled. you could see the appeal of him. the thick rimmed glasses and short hair that was dyed to keep its youthful appearance. he looked like a man who knew what he was doing in his suit, the first few buttons of the button up shirt were undone, it made you do a double take.

but it wasn't until he reached up to move the chalkboard upwards, that you caught the glimpse of. your heart stopped for a moment as you saw the ink around his wrist. a familiar moon tattoo.

"what's this guy's name again?" you said quietly, unable to remember the professor's name.

"toto wolff... but his legal name is like torger or something." and you weren't too sure if colour left your face or flooded it. because the guy you masturbated to last night was teaching a guest lecture today and you had near front row seats to him. <3

[angelltheninth]

Riding Clark Kent Because He's Too Scared of Hurting You

Pairing: Clark Kent x Fem!Reader

Tags: nsfw, smut, cock riding, praise, strength difference, orgasm encouragement, size kink, big cock, sweet!Clark Kent

Ko-Fi | Rules | Fandoms and Characters

A/N: He's making me crazy! I can't wait for this movies, I will be there on day fucking one!

His large hands lock against your thighs, spreading them far enough so you can straddle him properly

But that is as far as Clark will go until he's more comfortable with using his strength, or speed for that matter, when you're having sex

While rare that he sweats he does when he's holding back

That's why he trusts you to take the lead and lets you set the pace

It doesn't matter how many times you get him to come, he stays hard until you've had enough

Due to his superhearing the sounds are all amplified, the sound of your pussy stretching around his girth, the sound of sticky cum being pushed in and out, the sound of his heavy balls slapping against your ass every time you go down, the sound of your hips hitting his, the sounds of your cute moans

He doesn't have to be on his back for you to ride him, he can be towering over you, his hands placed against the wall, you in front of him, rolling your hips into him, your ass smacking against his steel hard abs

The only way he will touch you is when he pus his thumb on your clit and vibrates it

Clark loves when you order him to come while you're riding him

It's just a few words for you, or it can be after you've edged him for a little bit and you can see the veins in his neck bulging as he clenches his jaw in the effort to hold back until you say he doesn't have to anymore

You don't even have to move your hips that much after a few rounds, you can stay on top of him, holding onto his shoulder, and let your tight pussy do the work, clench and unclench around his big cock

Mutters praise in Kryptonian, and even a few dirty words every time he finishes

So much so that you've even learned a few phrases and say it back to him

That really drives him insane, to hear his girlfriend talking dirty to him in Kryptoanian, that you bothered to remember, that you learned, he's beside himself with joy, talking even louder, words slurring together as he unloads his cum into your pussy

[bunnithechubs]

i want to set you world on fire.

transcript:

[TEXT THREAD WITH VINNY 7:00 PM] V: Hey, beautiful, I know I said I would send a car but I want to see you as soon as possible. I'm going to come pick you up instead. R: One condition. V: Anything. R: I don't want to sit in a car you've previously used with another woman. V: Reina, you could tell me to sign over my bank account and I would do it. An unused car is easy. I'll see you at 7:30 pm. Can't wait to see you. R: I expect full access to your bank account as entry :)

[TEXT THREAD WITH VINNY 7:20 PM] V: It's a little early but I'm here. I can wait for you if you're not ready yet. R: I'm ready. Come up.

V: You’re making me rethink dinner with you in this dress, Blue. R: Maybe if you impress me enough, I might let you figure out what is underneath it. V: You really love pushing me to my limits. R: I do, especially because it’s so easy to do. I mean I got you to send me fifteen hundred bucks for one picture. V: Probably not the smartest finanical decision I’ve made but it was worth it. I got you a little something on my way here. R: Is it access to your bank account?

V: laughs Maybe if you let me take you one a few more dates. I actually picked these up for you. R: More flowers? Were the hundreds you already sent not enough? V: Nope. R: Do you get women flowers often? V: Only once. R: raises eyebrow V: Relax, it was for my sister in law when she gave birth. R: Did she like them? V: Maybe one day you can ask her yourself. R: Family already? A bit soon. V: I said one day, now read the card.

CARD READS: "You are my greatest adventure" - Vinny

R: You misspelled nightmare. V: You know, Reina. I like that about you. R: Like what about me? V: You’re impossibility to be romanced. R: Maybe you’re just really bad at it. V: Oh am I? R: Would not recommend. V: Then why let me take you out to dinner? R: I’m bored and the slightest bit horny. V: So you’re just using me? R: Precisely. V: Let me ask you something- I want an honest answer. R: Don’t whine when I hurt your feelings, but go ahead.

V: What is it going to take to get you to stop busting my balls? R: You on your knees crying for me. V: You’re lying to me, Reina. R: I’m not. I want to see you broken down to the very last particle of that dog shit man that you are. I want your only thoughts to be of me and what you can do to please me. I want you begging for my approval and attention. [silence] R: So what is it going to be Vin-

[mythicmanuscripts]

Hiii! How do you think Aegon would be if reader left for a while like in that one thingy you did for Aemond. I feel like if he was left in the keep alone with just alicent and his family without his saving grace that the moment she came back he would be locking themselves in their rooms and not coming out for at least a few days so he could just heal from the hell that was being alone in the keep

Love this idea anon!!

There's nothing too explicit in this but it's Aegon so it's also definitely not entirely SFW. If you choose to venture beyond the cut then I hope you enjoy!

Firstly, this would have to be something that is just completely out of the question for him to attend. If it would be even slightly possible for him to go with you then he would, no questions asked.

(I'm now imagining a scene where your best friend who belongs to another powerful house outside of King's Landing asks you for help because they're expecting their first child. So you go to them and help them and support them during the birth... and Aegon came too of course. Your poor friend's husband had absolutely no idea what to do with himself. His wife was giving birth and the king was... in his living room??)

Anyway, point is that it would have to be something that he physically could not go to (and also something he couldnt just wait outside for, because he would do that too). I think the only real thing that could keep him back would be if it were safer for you for him to not be there? Like maybe you travel to one of the other kingdoms to negotiate with a powerful family you need to strengthen relationships with but they absolutely hate Targaryens. You're on good terms with them so you're by the best bet and Aegon knows if the family gets a whiff of him anywhere near they could become hostile and dangerous to you so he stays away.

He may have agreed to do that willingly but he's most certainly not going to take the weeks without you with any amount of grace. He will absolutely insufferable for that period of time and there's nothing anyone can do to change that.

Aegon knew he relied on you most, knew that in truth you made of the big decisions for the kingdom because he always consults you and always follows any advice you may give him. He also knew he was clingy, of course he knew. He followed you everywhere, always taking your hand and pouting if you have to be separate.

But despite knowing that, he's still shocked to realise how much he misses you? The first day after you left he got into a disagreement with someone on his small council that ended with him calling the person a cunt and ending the meeting early. The moment the left the room he immediately thought about how he wants to tell you about this that night, and then he realised you werent there. You wouldn't be with him that night. He couldnt tell you what happened.

Instances like those occur every day. He catches himself looking for you in every room he enters in the castle, and getting confused when you don't arrive for dinner and even more confused when you don't come to bed. No matter how many times he reminds himself that you arent there, he still constantly looks for you, like his body can't accept that you're not in the castle.

When you do finally arrive back the entire kingdom rejoices.

You don't even get to greet anyone before Aegon is just flinging himself in your arms and gripping you so hard he tears the fabric of your sleeve. He grips your hand extra tight as you walk back to your chambers.

You try to tell him that you have to update him and the small council on what you accomplished with the negotiations but Aegon is having none of it. He asks you if anything you did might cause an all out war in the next three days and when you say no, then he just says everything can wait then and drags you off to your shared quarters.

You expect him to be desperate and needy and very very horny, and while you are write about the first two you're actually wrong about the last one. Well, at least at first.

Once you've caught up and he's gotten to have a little nap in your arms then he'll wake up extremely horny but before that, he's mostly just desperate for your time and your attention? He wants to hear everything that happened and to tell you what happened with him, to make sure you're both caught up in each other's lives. And then he wants to lay in your arms until he can finally accept that you are indeed back.

So yeah, no one sees you for three days.

[writinginatree]

Kiss It Better

Relationship(s): Bodhi Durran/healer!reader

Summary: Bodhi shows up in the Healer Quadrant injured after a fight — again. With how often it happens lately, you're starting to suspect he's letting himself get hurt on purpose just so he has an excuse to come see you.

Dismissing your previous patient, you hurry on to the next. It's the day for challenges in the Riders Quadrant, which means even more of them are filling the beds of the infirmary than on normal days. Sure enough the person waiting on the next bed is dressed in black too, just like all five you'd treated today so far.

"What can I do for—" You break off when you actually look at the patient's face instead of just his uniform, and realize who it is sitting in front of you. "Bodhi?!"

"Hi, darling," your boyfriend greets you with a sheepish grin you don't return.

"What happened?" you demand to know instead. The only wound you can see on him is a small cut in his lower lip, but if that was all, he would've been turned away in favor of more seriously injured patients on such a busy day as this. "Is it bad? Show me where you're hurt!"

"It's not that bad," he assures you, and you relax a little, grateful he answered the most important question first. "Regular challenge, is all."

Still, his anatomical knowledge is hardly good enough to accurately judge if an injury is serious. He might think it isn't if it doesn't hurt much, but there are plenty of injuries that could be dangerous without feeling too bad.

"Show me!"

He lifts his shirt, revealing a fresh bruise blossoming across the side of his chest. "I think one or two of my ribs might have gotten cracked a little."

"Gods, Bodhi—"

"It's not that bad, really."

"Lie down and leave it to me to judge how bad it is. I'm the healer here, not you."

Bodhi does as you said, but can't stop himself from trying to soothe you. "Of course. I'm just saying, it barely even hurts. I wouldn't have bothered seeing a healer about it, but I knew you have infirmary duty today, so I figured—"

He interrupts himself with a hiss of pain when you touch your hand to the bruise, gingerly feeling along his ribs. There's some swelling, but no more than is normal for a bad bruise, and you can't feel any deformities from loose pieces of bone, either.

"Does it hurt when I press here?"

Bodhi nods, and you take your hand away, running it through his curls instead.

"How bad? On a scale of one to ten?"

"Six, maybe?"

"Okay... Take a deep breath. Does that make the pain worse?"

Doing as instructed, he winces. "Yeah, that hurts. But normal breathing doesn't."

You nod to yourself, already fairly certain it's just a small hairline break at the most. Painful enough, but by no means fatal.

As you continue to assess the severity of Bodhi's injury, your worry for him starts to ease, irritation rising in its stead. He's getting hurt much too often for your liking. It's not really his fault, you know, and it kind of comes with the job description of being a rider, but surely some of the injuries he has sought you out with could have been avoided if only he was a little more careful! Of course, it's not just him. After a year and a few months in the Healer Quadrant, you can confidently say that riders in general are reckless fools with zero regard for their own well-being — which is exactly why your fellow healer friends think you're insane for dating one of those daredevils with their thin-altitude-air-addled brains. While you love Bodhi dearly and wouldn't trade him for the world, your friends do have a point. Unlike you, your best friend never has to worry that her scribe boyfriend will wind up dead one day, nor does he add to the healers' already extensive enough workload by showing up injured every other day.

You shake your head at yourself. Now you're exaggerating. But Bodhi does make you worry a lot, and you can't even bring yourself to actually be mad at him for it. Not when he looks at you with that adoring smile, kissing your knuckles in thanks as you spread an ointment with a cooling effect over his bruised ribs.

"You're being careless lately," you say, the words coming out too softly to be taken as the accusation they're meant to be. "You never used to get hurt this often."

Bodhi just shrugs.

Having started dating at the end of your first year at Basgiath, you'd hoped to see less of him in your quadrant this year — as a patient, at least. But it seems second-year riders are no safer than their first-years. If anything, you've already seen more of Bodhi this year than you had in all your first year, though of course you hadn't payed as much attention to him then, so you might be misjudging.

You don't think you are, though. He's come seeking medical attention thrice in the last two weeks alone — conveniently always when you were on duty, you realize. You know he has your schedule memorized, so now that you think about it, it hardly seems like coincidence that every time he shows up it's when you're here. But it has to be, right? Surely he wouldn't be so stupid as to hurt himself on purpose just to see you... Right?

Faced with the way he's watching you — like a lovesick puppy, like you're the only thing in the world that matters — you're not so sure. It's true that classes and extracurricular responsibilities don't leave either of you as much free time to spend with the other as the both of you would like, but collecting injuries like this just for a few minutes more with you seems a little extreme.

And yet, you can't entirely put it past Bodhi. As a rider, extreme is kind of what he does.

Now that you've started thinking about it, you can't push the suspicion from your mind, so as you put the ointment aside, you decide to simply ask. "How come it's always when I'm on duty that you're getting hurt?"

Bodhi unsuccessfully fights a smile. "Luck?"

"Luck," you deadpan, now almost fully convinced he's been doing it on purpose. How fucking reckless can someone be?!

"Okay, you caught me. I might have been a little careless on purpose because I knew getting hurt would mean I get to see you."

"You're an idiot," you scold. "What if you'd gotten yourself hurt more seriously, huh? You won't get to see me at all anymore if you get yourself killed!"

"I wasn't that careless," Bodhi starts, but you're not in the mood to let him calm you down that easily.

"You can't control how badly someone hurts you when you let your guard down," you say. A look at the guilty look on his face has you softening a little. Cupping his cheek, you continue, "I wish we had more time together too, but I'd rather have you in one piece when I do get to see you."

Bodhi sighs. "I know. I'm sorry for being so reckless. Making you worry is the last thing I wanted."

"I know."

You peck his cheek, and reach for a cotton ball and antiseptic to disinfect Bodhi's split lip. He hisses at the sting, but you don't show any mercy until you're sure the cut is clean. A little pain now is better than possibly letting the wound become infected.

Bodhi gives you that adorable look you can never resist, tapping his bottom lip. "Kiss it better?"

You pretend to think about it, pursing your lips even as you want nothing more than to press them to his. "Only if you promise to be more careful," you finally say.

"Promise," he quickly agrees.

A little too quickly.

"I mean it, Bodhi. You've been lucky so far, but broken ribs aren't as harmless as you seem to think. If the fracture is bad enough the broken ends could pierce your lungs and kill you!"

He takes your hands, kissing each of your palms before answering, his voice taking on such serious a tone that you know he really means it when he says, "I'll be more careful. I promise. And I'm really sorry for making you worry about me."

You cup his face in both hands, tilting his head so you can press a soft kiss to his lips.

"Thank you," you mumble, and kiss him again. When he tries to deepen the kiss into something hungrier, you pull back, mindful of the cut in his lip. You rub your thumb over it, a slight smile on your own lips. "Careful, love, or it'll start bleeding again."

"Worth it," Bodhi shrugs and tries to kiss you again, pouting when you stop him with a finger over his mouth.

"Nuh-uh. Let it heal a little, then you can kiss me all you want on our date tomorrow."

"One more kiss," he pleads. "Just a little one."

You peck his lips one, two, three more times, finally forcing yourself to take a step back.

"I'll be in trouble if someone notices how long I'm taking with you," you say apologetically. "There's other patients requiring my attention."

Bodhi nods. "Right. I'll leave you to it, then."

"Not so fast." You push him back into his seat, turning to search through a shelf until you find the little ceramic container of pills you're looking for. You hand it to Bodhi, along with the ointment you'd applied to his ribs. "Here. Take one of these if the pain gets too bad. You can have up to three a day, but never less than five hours apart, okay?"

"Got it. Thanks."

"You can be generous with the cooling salve, but you'll probably only need it the first few days. It's only a small fracture, so it shouldn't give you too much trouble, but you do need to take it easy for a bit. Do not give me that look, Durran. If you overexert yourself that'll only make it heal slower."

"I know, I know. But I can still participate in challenges and stuff, right?"

You sigh. "I'd appreciate it if you took a day or two to actually rest, without sparring or any form of physical activity, but after that, yes. It should be fine, so long as you don't overdo it."

"I'll take it easy," Bodhi promises.

"And make sure you get enough sleep. Sleep is essential for your body's ability to heal itself, just like good nutrition." Smiling, you add, "You can drop by next week so I can check the healing progress."

Bodhi smiles back, and, rising to his feet, steals another kiss. "Sounds good. Then I'll stop distracting you from your work now. See you tomorrow?"

"Yeah. Tomorrow."

[vantedaes]

cry, cry, cry

pairing: nanami kento x f!reader tags: porn with little plot, dacryphilia (or an attempt at it at least) soft dom nanami, slight breathplay, fingering, alcohol use, body fluids mentions, unprotected sex, manhandling, slight objectivization, passing out, hair pulling, pussy spanking, slight breeding kink, reader does not talk but because of the context no because she can't. NO PROOFREAD. an: English is not my first language, there might be mistakes that would be addressed,,, someday, for now I just want this to be posted it has been sitting on my drafts like forever. Inspired by this tiktok of my lovely bbh

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT +18 ONLY!!!

!Husband Kento was not a stranger to being enraged when working overtime, however, he didn't make a habit of taking that rage home, where his lovely wife was waiting for him. Unfortunately for him, today was one of those days he couldn´t stop the bubbling wrath when returning home after insufferable overtime hours cleaning everyone´s messes.

Of course, he had sent you a text beforehand letting you know that it was for the best to allow him time to cool down before talking to him, and thankfully you've been supporting and understanding as ever telling him that he shouldn´t worry and that a glass of his favorite bourbon was already served in his study.

You knew exactly that your lovely husband had an especially rough day, you could tell by the sound of the door opening an abrasive almost like the FBI was breaking into your house, you could hear from your shared room the loud slamming of the door, so strong it made you flinch, your cat scaping your blanket running into hiding somewhere in the closet.

Closing your book you put it on your nightstand and heard how the heavy steps of your husband made their way to your home, you could listen to the rustling of his clothing and another slam of what you could guess was his suitcase, oh he was real upset, Not long after that you hear him opening the door of his study. Standing up you got out of your shared room, you didn't want to bother him at all knowing he had to blow some steam so you just went to the drawing room to assess the situation, with soft steps you saw how his coat was thrown under the hanger and his suitcase a few steps from the coat, open, revealing what you could only assume was red numbers and some other reports he had to deal with, you did your best to accommodate everything in its place hearing your husband going slamming things in his office.

You knew it was better to just go to sleep and wait for him to come to bed whenever he felt like it, but, you were also curious, you´d never seen him this upset, so after getting his thing together you made your way silently to his study, almost on tiptoes, the door was wide open which made your little espionage easier. Only the light of his desk was on, you leaned in the doorframe like a child trying not to get busted when they know were being naughty, your breath caught into your throat when you saw him, his back to you pouring even more of the bourbon and gulping it in just one quick motion, his muscles evidently tense making him look even bigger, menacing even, his big hands gripping the glass and the movement of his throat working that burning alcohol down like it was nothing.

And dear lord, you could feel your pajama shorts getting soaked.

Your skin burned like it had caught on fire, you weren't unfamiliar with how insanely hot and attractive your husband was, but he was different, this was the first time you'd seen him, this, this enraged, his whole demeanor changing in a drastically form that you've never experimented and your eyes were glazing for jus the sight, your finger ticketing to help you relieve some of that tension desire building in the pit of your stomach. Your husband then sits on his chair, his strong tights expanding, and his crotch more prominent, his hair like a full mess, golden locks falling into his gorgeous face that was contorted into a hostile expression that only made you press your tights even closer to each other, you could feel yourself trembling with a raw need that was taking over every grain of your sanity.

But then in a swift motion, after struggling to take off his tie he simply opted for tearing apart the damn thing, the buttons of his shirt flying to different parts of the room, allowing his massive chest to breathe and with that sinful sight you could help but gasp. Still, in reality, it was more like a pitiful whimper that was capable of getting your very angry husband´s attention to you.

The moment your eyes connected with his dark eyes you didn´t move an inch, something like fear creeping into you, but not a fear for your life, more like a fear of a beast that found the most helpless prey on its own lair, which was accurately what was happening.

Your husband stood up and gulped the whisky quickly, licking his lips as he addressed you.

"C´me here" His voice was raspy, like going through your whole body, it made you quiver even more, made your whole being more intoxicated.

Slowly you approached him, his eyes never leaving you for a second, and you were used to Kento´s eyes on you, his attentive and longing gaze every time he looked at you, but the way he was looking at you now was something else, like drinking the sight of you, like devouring your whole image, resembling a madman that has been starved. When you got close enough you stopped, just a few centimeters separating you, he smirked cockily his lips glazed with the bourbon, and your nostrils were filled with the scent of his cologne mixed with alcohol it roamed through your figure and you find yourself inhaling it, fueling even more the heat that was about to explode inside your body. Your husband looked amused at how you were paralyzed in front of him like you were asking permission to touch him, your own husband, it was ridiculous, and yet it was what his good girl knew had to do.

"Look at you, shamelessly spying on me when I perfectly told you to give me space" His hand gripped your chin with a strength that made you part your lips in surprise "Now that you got what you wanted...you´re all shaky, angel"

You wanted to answer sure, it wasn´t your nature to stay quiet, you were always quick with a comeback but like a charm, you were just mute and so fucking needy, he, your husband, was not a man who loses his calm like ever, one year of marriage and you've never seen him this deranged.

He could hardly blame you for how pathetic you looked, it wasn't your fault that your body reacted like this.

Quivering, you tried to speak "I—"

And without any kind of warning, he grabbed your waist with a strength that made you gasp in surprise, the sound of shattering glass stealing your attention for a quick second —he really threw his glass on the floor—, but as soon as you felt your frame pressed tightly at the body of Kento your mind went to a fucking blank again, contemplating how his normally hazel color eyes were totally pitch black. His arm was like an iron band around your waist and your hands posed on his big chest trying to hold onto something, his closeness making you quiver like a leaf and you could just read in his expression how much he liked all of your wretched reactions.

"Shh...it´s alright angel" he whispered hotly upon your lips "I already know what you want"

Before you could process any of his words he took you and bent you over his desk, your hips pressed against the edge of it and all of the stuff on top of it falling down, the bottle of whiskey spilling over the wood surface where your face was now pressed against wetting your cheek and lips, you were never a fan of whiskey or any strong alcohol really but right now you welcomed it eagerly with your mouth hanging open when you felt the hot and rough hands of your husband stripping you off your pajama shorts, your cunt being met with the breeze of the room, soaked, you felt how your juices were already trailing your tights. You moaned pitifully, your hole clenching into nothing.

Nanami laughed in a vibrato that made your knees buckle, "Look at that, so fucking wet..." his fingers trailed your dampness pressing over your wet swollen lips gathering all the liquid before entering your entrance in a quick movement, you let out a high pitched moan at the sudden intermission "That´s right angel, you will take it"

He kept moving his fingers inside your cunt quickly while his other hand kept your head firmly pressed into his desk, the whisky fusing with your saliva as you kept loudly moaning, your body going into shambles quickly, Nanami was like a feral beast fucking you with his fingers letting out the hottest low grunts that were making your orgasm approach like a tidal wave in just mere seconds of his fingers inside you.

"Yes yes yes" you chanted in ecstasy your legs fully trembling as your orgasm hit you with an intensity that would almost make you fall if it wasn't for the firm hand of your husband keeping you still on the surface of his desk, a loud moaning of his name leaving your mouth.

"made a mess of my fingers angel, so needy you came so fast" his fingers leaving your leaky entrance and trailing through your cunt greedily. you were panting with the aftermath of your orgasm, the whiskey now soaking the whole table and part of your hair "Filthy, filthy girl, looking like a used whore after just taking my fingers"

He roamed a chuckle, then you heard him sucking his fingers nastily, sounding richly across the room, and in a quick moment he slapped your pussy making you scream your already shaky legs buckling and almost falling to the floor only to be grabbed by your wrists and manhandled to your position on the table.

Another smack on your pussy made you yelp, "Come on now, don't act like this cunt doesn't like it rough" You felt him pressing against your ass, fully clothed, and yet you felt the big bulge twitching against your bare cunt, soaking his pants, it was unbearable to have his cock still on his pants when you wanted it so so so bad.

However, you could only mutter pathetic whimpers, so clouded and drunk on his cock that wasn't even inside you. "Stay put" Your husband demanded and you immediately went still, excitement filling your body as you heard him unfast his belt followed by his zipper and a delicious groan as his cock was fully out

You couldn't quite see but you knew he didn't take off his pants by the way you could feel the fabric on your tights and fuck, you could come just right there again.

"I believe you know I have no intend of going soft with you tonight," He remarked while tracing his cock on your swollen lips, his precum fusing with your juices "Oh, but look at you angel... so fucked up looking like you could die if I don't give you this cock"

"I—" A slap to your asscheek cut you off to a pathetic moan, and soon you felt the hard body of your husband pressing on your back to whisper in your ear.

"I don´t want to hear anything that is not those pathetic little moans you made" His hot breath against your neck had you shivering, with his hard cock nestled between your folds you could do nothing but behave, tears escaping your eyes betraying how much you wanted it, how much you need it, Nanami trailed your neck inhaling your scent like he needed it more than air leaving wet open mouth kisses on your boiling hot skin. Despite the twitching of his cock against your folds he did nothing more than tease your skin with his hot breath on your most sensible zones, driving you into absolute madness, your hole clenching, hungry, and desperate.

His hands gripping your waist tightly, you were sure tomorrow it'll have a mark. "Nothing more than a slut for this cock hm?" he teased leaving your back, standing again he took your jaw turning your face to him, when you looked at his handsome face his eyes looked like a deep endless void of how black and dilated they were, not a trace of his usual hazel like eyes, he looked at you with ravenousness, his eyes darting through your face that was now covered in tears

His cock twitched at the sight of your whipping face, you started sobbing, your lips trembling in a way of begging him to fuck you.

"Oh fuck" He moaned leaving your jaw to tug on your hair and grabbing the base of his cock he finally directed his tip to your needy entrance, you moaned even more between tears feeling how the length of your husband's cock stretched you.

And your husband was big and, oh, he did not intend to go soft with you, remember? So you should have expected when his full-length slammed into your cunt in a strong thrust, making you cry loud, your hands grabbing the edge of the table, you could feel his cock molding your insides, his veins popping through your walls and if you were already not intoxicated you surely were now.

Nanami moaned feeling your pussy tightening around him like you want to cut him off, he pulled your hair into his fist harder and looking straight at your eyes he hissed, "Put your fucking hands were they where"

Looking at him with big tearful eyes you clasped your hands together behind your back, your hold stability now depending on how your husband had your hair pulled into his fist. "Such an obedient girl... Now keep sobbing like a dumb slut while I feed you this cock"

And with that, you could only hiccup pathetically, Nanami's thrusts were erratic and fast, kissing every bit of your insides, he looked at you with a deranged look, enjoying how you were drooling and crying while taking his cock so harshly, he fucking loved it, having you go all fucking stupid on his big cock and have you reduced to a needy little thing.

"Yes, fuck—that's right, so fucking tight around me" his sloppy thrust was making you dizzy on how deep he was reaching into you, your orgasm already in the making ready to burst with the warning of being even bigger than the last one and your husband knew it completely, that smirk of his adorning his lips, and with that your second orgasm erupt shaking your whole body, your husband groaned pulling on your hair harder making you stare at him while you creamed his cock and your eyes rolled, tears trailing down your face to your throat disappearing on your breasts, your husband's depraved eyes look at it and soon you had him turning you around without leaving your sloppy hole to now have you laying down the desk in a more comfortably position

A position that allowed you to look upon your very disheveled husband, through your teary and hazy eyes you could see and rink on the sight of Nanami just fucking into you like a mad man, like a fucking wild animal, his hands now gripping your jaw playing with it like you were a useless doll, his fingers entering your hot mouth pressing on your tongue while he kept pounding that fat cock into you, you whimper so cockdrunk you were about to pass out feeling his hard cock kiss your cervix every time, he was ruthless in the way he was fucking you and you were obsessed with it.

"Fuck, I'm going to fill you up so fucking good" he left your jaw and slapped your tits before rubbing your clit in a maniac rhythm that pull you out of your drowsy state and soon you were filling up another orgasm approaching, "come for me sweetheart, I know you can, fuck—do it"

His thrusts were, even more, sloppier, erratic, and quick you felt like you were about to explode, it was way too much, you were pushing the limits of your oversensitive body, but oh, how you loved it especially when you felt his hard cock stiffen even more inside you and warm cum filling your insides and soon you were cumming a third time, this time even more intense than the previous ones and your whole body shudder at the immense pleasure and the fullness of the cum inside you, your husband moans in the background of your nirvana, it was as you where losing your holding on the world and soon everything went blank.

!Husband Kento was heavily panting rolling off the immense orgasm he had, only to find his lovely wife passed out on his desk, and even though his first response was to get worried that he indeed had been too rough with you, but, the happiness on your —very fucked up— face told him everything he needed to know.

Taking his dick out of you he put himself together and took your limp body in his arms to carry you into the bathroom, somewhere along the way you regained consciousness, your pretty confused eyes looked at him and soon your cheeks turned red "Hello beautiful, I'm going to take care of you now"

Simply he assured you with a smile and a kiss to your damped forehead, you smelled like sweat and whiskey.

"..." You looked like you wanted to speak and Nanami could only chuckle affectionately at your uncertainty.

"You can speak now angel"

[sylver-star]

⭑.ᐟ

You're doing your best to not fidget with your clothes, but it's hard when you're this nervous. A part of you wants to call him to tell you that you've suddenly gotten sick - but it wouldn't be nice to him, and you know you'd only end up regretting it. You've waited for this moment for a few years now. Waited might be the wrong term; hoped for is more like it.

When your best friend asked you out a few days ago, you were left speechless for long enough that he started apologizing and taking back his words. Seokmin is someone who's constantly afraid of making others uncomfortable, to the point of his own detriment. The only thing that could shut him up once he had started babbling, was a kiss. A long awaited, chaste, kiss.

Because of that kiss, you're now waiting for him to pick you up to go on your first date. You're pacing by the door when, at seven pm sharp, someone knocks. After a deep breath, you open the door only to be met with a bouquet of flowers.

"Are these for me?" Your eyes widen as you take the flowers in your hands.

Seokmin doesn't say anything, he only lingers by the doorstep and stares at you. You raise your brows at him, silently asking the question again. Now that the flowers are out of the way, you see that he's wearing the button-up you got him for his birthday last year - and the slacks that you practically begged him to buy because "they fit him like they were sewn onto his body". Still, he just keeps looking at you.

"Seok?"

"Sorry." He clears his throat. "I've literally been standing outside your door for five minutes to wait until the clock was seven, and I was thinking of what to say to you that entire time and still I got nothing..."

You break out into a big grin. "I've been standing here for the past five minutes too."

The two of you chuckle, letting go of some of the tension in the air. "Can I start over?" he asks.

"Sure... do you want these back too?" You hand him the flowers and he takes them back carefully.

You can't stop giggling as you close the door again, and you can hear him laughing on the other side. After waiting a second or two, Seokmin knocks again. You open the door, and he's holding the flowers in front of his face.

"I'm here to see Y/N," he says.

You gently pull at his arms to lower the flower from his face, seeing his beaming grin peek out from behind the bouquet. "Oh, hi!" he says.

"Hi." You giggle. "These are very pretty. Are they for me?"

"Why, yes, they are."

He hands them to you, and you take your chance to take his wrist to pull him closer and press a kiss to his cheek. Seokmin lets you take the flowers and puts one of his hands up to his cheek.

"Let me go put them in some water... come inside." You let him walk into your apartment, following you as you walk to your kitchen and get a vase.

When you turn to him again, he's leaning against the wall and still just watching you. You put the flowers in water and, with a giddy smile, walk back up to your date.

"Thank you, Seokmin," you say.

"I just thought you deserved something pretty... you know, something to match... you." He cringes at his own words and looks away from you.

"You think I'm pretty?" you ask, and he turns his head back to you.

"The prettiest." He takes your hand in his. "Ready to go?"

"Ready as I'll ever be, handsome."

That manages to make him flustered.

[luvvzinspo]

Hii

I LOVE YOUR HEADCANONS FOR DAISUKE SO MUCH!! Can i request maybe daisuke x female reader on her period? (It can be fluff, comfort or hcs, i dont really care) Of course, if you are comfortable with it!

Have a nice day/ night❤️❤️

ans: why haven't I thought of this??? yess!!

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Daisuke - MW - 🩸 Headcannons

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

(no NSFW, I slipped in a few little situations)

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

•❀• I feel like he'd be so comforting, and he wants to make you laugh, or distract you if you're hurt in any way.

•❀• He's the sweetest thing when it comes to you, and situations like this.

•❀• he's DEFINITELY helping you out with anything, and he probably doesn't even want you to have trouble walking, so he carries you. (Bridal style)

•❀• You need something? He's already on it! He will literally do anything for you at this point. Even if it's grabbing the TV remote that's just barely out of your reach.

•❀• He's so smitten, he can't get enough of your voice. And you bleeding, even if it's 'just' a period, he feels so bad.

•❀• You want snacks? He's already made you food, got chips, got sweets, soda, water, tea, soup, and I feel like this boy loves to make angel food cake. Idk why.

──────────────

"How ya feeling, pretty girl?"

"Not good."

He frowns, clearly not liking it when you have to go through this.

"Why do you have to have a period? Like you don't really need a reminder that you don't have a baby. Just take a pregnancy test or something, and why does it have to be for so long?"

"what??"

──────────────

•❀• Sometimes he just yaps about random stuff. And I bet it hurts him so bad to see you in pain. He wish he could switch roles with you.

•❀• He's definitely giving you massages, no matter where you want them. He just wants you to be relaxed, and feel safe and calm.

•❀• He would definitely tell you stories about random things like, him "falling down from a tree" when he was 12 or something.

──────────────

"And— BOOM! I feel straight down, and some group of kids starting laughing about me! I wanted to give them a taste of my mind, but they were kinda bigger than me, so I was scared. Bullies are not sigma, dude."

"Do you have any more stories?"

"Hell yeah! One time I was..."

──────────────

•❀• I'd imagine him being brainrotted, idk why, but.. yeah.😪

•❀• He has sooo many stories to tell you, and some aren't even about him. He just loves when you listen, and he's the one talking.

•❀• But he definitely loves to hear you talk too. Mention anything, he's all ears.

•❀• Daisuke is such a sweetheart. Just wait for this boy to grow up, and he's a full on gentleman.

•❀• This man is barging into your room with snacks, drinks, blankets, stuffed animals, and so much more.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Sorry I couldn't write much, I was in a rush and I'm currently sooo tired it's insane!! 😓

[malinowaj]

2024 fandom review

thank you for the tag @nerdyfangirl76 and @almostlake 💜

warning: this got really long

fics written

in 2024, i posted 3 finished fics and one currently on-going WIP. in total that was 122,542 words and i keep looking at that number in complete disbelief.

i started the year by saying, multiple times, i'm not going to write anything because it's been nearly a decade since i wrote for fun. then i had an idea and was all "well, maybe if i wrote this one short thing, posted it and then dipped never to be seen again". insert my friend laughing at me at regular intervals because we all know that's not what happened.

always losing to win is very dear to me, for several reasons, and it'll never stop blowing my mind how many people have read it and been on that journey with me.

fics read

my AO3 history is about 300 fics, but i did not sort out my logins until months into the year, so the actual number is probably somewhere closer to 350.

i tried to pick a few favourite fics i read and limiting myself to just these is hard. i regret to say none of these have received the praise, comments and love from me that they deserve, because it took me months to get over my comment shyness. but i hope this makes up for it a bit. (new year's resolution: more comments for everyone.) in alphabetical order by title:

almost is never enough by @in-amor-veritas

there's a scene in this with kent's 747 that i have the strongest, plot-wise most insignificant headcanon about and i think about it every time i hear the song. which is often. and then i end up thinking about the whole story.

another dose by stargazers

it's such a beautiful version of wilmon, because it's so them. and it's hot.

chasing our sunlight by fitz_y

if there ever was a fic that lives rent free in my head, it's this. the way it deals with so many heavy topics has made me cry, but it's such an incredibly crafted story i come back to it often.

forever i'm yours by @goldenwilmon

the way the fall in love in this one? hands down one of my favourites ever. whenever i need some fluff and happiness in my life, this is the one i go for.

little light by @unfortunate17

possibly one of the first, if not the first, wilmon fic i read in 2024. it broke something in me, but also healed something in me.

reckless abandon by @zee-has-commitment-issues

i absolutely love the concept and the way all the characters are so well-rounded. one of the fics i could not stop reading and can't wait to read again.

so loaded, eye low by @enjoythesilentworld

the chemistry, the angst. the sweet, delicious angst. and hot as hell.

where be left off by @gulliblelemon

the best way for me to fight some physical pain? some emotional pain. and this one has it, in the best, most beautiful way. very few fics have i devoured like i did this one.

the wolf comes home by @phneltwrites

after months, i still keep thinking about a particular line in this one. the trauma aftermath, the way they deal with it. also my favourite established relationship wilmon.

looking forward to in 2025

i can't wait to read and see all the amazing fics and gifs and edits and everything this fandom comes up with. i already know there'll be so many wonderful things i'll enjoy.

as for my own writing, i'm trying to get a good chunk of hope and legacy written before the insanity that'll be my life from late january to the end of february. (no context chapter 4 spoiler: simon steals a flag.)

there is also in from the cold, the espionage AU i have about 10K written for - and that's barely the beginning. i don't know if it'll ever see the light of day, but i do love the concept and all the research i've done for it.

i have been thinking about space wilmon lately, and while i said i'm not going to go down that road myself, i did remember a few lines from record of a spaceborn few that may have sparked an idea. it might become something one day, or it might never be more than the few disjointed lines and ideas i have typed in my notes.

there's also a file with a list of songs that i might want to build stories around. in general i have a lot of ideas, but very few of them might become anything. i'd like to put it down as "english is not my first language so writing is slow" thing, and while it is that too, it's mostly me being a perfectionist and not able to let go. (which is why i should probably have a beta telling me 'this is fine, go post it'. if anyone feels up for doing that...)

the biggest, warmest thank you to everyone who's read anything i've written, left kudos or comments, sent messages, in any way engaged. it has made my year, and this fandom experience so special 💜

not tagging anyone, but if any of the authors i mentioned haven't done this yet and would like to, i'd love to read your reviews.

[possibilistfanfiction]

i really enjoyed the back and forth that cait and vi had where she asks her whether she’s been to university. i think they’re two people that match each other’s energy so well and truly understand each other even when they were just getting to know each other.

so maybe a prompt where they have their first big fight that they haven’t been able to work through like they usually do and jinx is the bridge that connects them both and helps them see where the other is coming from? i love reading about jinx’s relationship with the two of them and how she still struggles with thoughts of letting vi go to be loved by cait too.

[jinx the mvp, 10/10 little sister. lots of u wanted some more jinx interacting with cait / vi + cait which like same! additionally, p obviously hints at autistic cait bc 10/10 also. their argument is truly so dumb but hard relate lol]

//

tense is an understatement, but, you swear, it's totally not your fault.

or, at least, you're mostly sure: you had a full day of classes, and then your lab work study, and you made out a little and then napped in ekko's dorm. you didn't sleep over because vi had told you that caitlyn was going to come over tonight, and, despite her being annoying and prissy and the two of them sometimes having sex loud enough you could hear it through the wall, she does always bring you the best takeout from all of your favorite restaurants, orders way more than you could afford. it was, definitely, a necessary bribe the first few times, but it's been almost half a year of cait and vi, so you've accepted your fate now; she doesn't need to know that, though, because it's fucking boiling outside and you can't wait for the fancy greek salad and fresh squeezed lemonade you know will be sitting in the fridge for you.

you expect to walk in to the two of them canoodling on the couch or some other gay activity like scrabble (vi is a horrible speller, so it's kind of pathetic, in your opinion, that she lets caitlyn suggest it and agrees every time) or watching killing eve for the bazillionth time (less pathetic, and much hotter, but still) or carefully compiling all of the gear you need for your climbing trip over the weekend (the best overall option, because, obviously, but it's still too devoted for your liking).

instead, when you open the door and go through your daily routine of flinging all of your stuff all over the entryway that vi insistently keeps spotless, just like the rest of the apartment other than your room, and yell honey, i'm home!, you're met with stony silence, and then a stressed, 'hey,' from vi, slumped over at the kitchen island, glumly sitting on a bar stool with her chin in her hand.

'uh, hello.' you rummage around in the fridge and easily find, just like you dreamed, your salad and lemonade, and there's even some baklava left out on the counter — more than one portion, and you kind of know, already, that things had really nosedived. you sit down next to vi. 'sooooooo... where's our esteemed dr. kiramman?'

vi sighs, totally put out. '"taking a walk,"' complete with air quotes.

you hmm around a bite of mostly feta, perfect in your book. 'first fight?'

vi pinches the bridge of her nose; her shoulders and jaw are set in a way that you recognize from your entire life watching her try not to cry.

'okay, well, what did you do that was wrong, and what did she do that was wrong?' vi turns to you, all of the anger seeping out of her glare when you hold up your hands in defeat. 'i mean, it's usually a two way street, right?'

'you've gone to way too much therapy.'

you laugh, and it gets vi to crack a smile. the reality is that you're going to be on a bunch of medications and in psychiatric care, hopefully outpatient, for the rest of your life, but, honestly, you're basically killing it: you're hot, brilliant, and haven't had any delusions or psychotic episodes in well over a year — total triple threat.

you nudge vi in the shoulder. 'so what happened?'

'i don't even know,' she laments, genuinely dramatic. 'we were having dinner, and things were fine, i was telling her about one of the calls i went on today, and then she just, i don't know. started acting really short with me, and irritated for no reason, and it just... spiraled, i guess. we were both frustrated, and i was unkind, and she cried, and then she said she needed to take a walk.'

you finish chewing your bite. 'well, that doesn't sound, like, horrible. and, no offense, i'm sure she had a reason.'

vi picks at the mostly-healed scab on one of her knuckles. 'i have so many shortcomings, compared to her.'

you roll your eyes. 'you're the best person i know. i will deny it until the day i die, but you are, vi.' sometimes, you still want to keep vi all to yourself, but she's been happier these past six months than you've ever seen her. 'you know that's not what i meant.'

'whatever.'

'look, i'm sure it's more than just you.' caitlyn is, overall, a fairly patient person, and she's been gentle to your sister in the most important ways.

'you just said it was because of me.'

you groan. 'this is why you got in a fight. did you have a bad day too?'

the scab on her knuckle comes off and the cut underneath starts to bleed; vi presses her thumb into it. you hand her a napkin instead, waiting patiently until she takes it. maybe your petulance was an inherited trait, you think. 'i couldn't get someone's pet out in time. a cat; i just couldn't find it, and, i don't know. it's my job, and i did all i could, and i got yelled at for staying inside too long, and i'm just —' tears well at her eyes, and she's always been so soft — 'i'm so tired. i didn't want to have a fight.'

shushing her with platitudes would never go well, but you've grown to understand that vi missed five years of gentle touch, probably when she needed it the most. it's not often you get to take care of her, but you're thankful you can help now, at least a little. she leans into your hug and cries into your shoulder, and you just let her. 'you gotta stop staying in burning buildings too long, you know. scares the shit out of me.'

'i know,' vi mumbles into your shoulder. 'i don't — i don't mean to. scare you, at least.'

'well, maybe cait was scared. maybe, she didn't express it well.'

'that... could be part of it,' vi admits, perking up a little: that's not insurmountable.

'it's good, you know, that she took a walk. great coping skill, grounding through bilateral movement.' vi stares at you blankly, although it's just an act because she's been to years of your therapy with you and knows exactly what to do when you're having a hard time. you personally haven't talked to caitlyn outright about details, either, but you're sure vi has and you're definitely not unaware: caitlyn stims, like, all the time, in subtle ways but ones you recognize, and she hates eggs because of their texture, and you've watched her have little mini meltdowns over crags being crowded, or traffic being worse than it showed on the map; just last week when vi got her annual "summer haircut" without telling caitlyn first she'd excused herself for a moment to, you're pretty sure, cry in the bathroom — nothing to do with control, only needing more processing time and space to adjust to change. 'i'm sure her brain gets overwhelmed sometimes, too. big emotions, and being tired, and eating noises? nightmare blunt rotation, for me at least.'

vi thinks about it for a moment, and then she, thankfully, laughs. 'you wouldn't last a day in prison.'

'so true,' you say, and you don't let the grief eat at you, not right now. 'but you did, and you should eat your baklava before she comes back.'

vi looks at the dessert, a little stressed, but you just shrug and offer her a small fork from the drawer.

'i'm going to my room to eavesdrop.' you grin and put your share on a small plate. 'if you need me to cause a commotion, we can have a code word. i have plenty of things going on that would explode safely.'

'not too words that i feel confident in as a pairing.'

'thinking of the security deposit. very wise.'

it has its intended effect: vi snorts a laugh and takes a small bite, pleased at the honey and pasty and pistachio.

you squeeze her shoulder. 'love you, sis.'

she puts her hand on top of yours: always bigger, always stronger and steadier, always gentler. 'love you too.'

//

you do listen to them, whatever, once cait comes back. she apologizes, and then vi apologizes, and you live text the entire thing to ekko because otherwise it'd probably be too sappy to endure. they get at the heart of it pretty quick, mostly thanks to your advice to vi, thank you very much. apparently, caitlyn felt overstimulated from a few long work days with way too much masking, and the heatwave, and not enough sleep, and, unsurprisingly, you were right that she was frustrated with vi putting herself in danger and also chewing her gyro too loudly. vi had gotten frustrated because she was confused what she'd done wrong, and why caitlyn was upset, and she was really hungry because she'd skipped lunch so she already didn't want to have a long conversation while they ate, and, bigger than all of that, she always worries that she's not good enough, that she can't save everyone. her voice breaks a little when she explains.

'oh, darling,' caitlyn says, which, in ekko's words when you text him, barf, 'you can't save everyone.'

'yeah,' she croaks in a reluctant agreement.

'but you've done so well by your family, and those who love you. we don't need saving, we just need you.'

when vi starts to really cry at that, like, maybe you shed a tear or two as well, because caitlyn is an outsider. she hasn't know you your whole life, and she didn't know you when you had no idea what was real or not, when you thought vi — visiting you in that cold, damp tent, patiently, not forcing you to leave, for weeks on end — was some sort of ghost, when you spent days unable to fully wake up or stop moving, some horrible purgatory, when you were hospitalized and in withdrawal and the doctors hadn't figured out the right dosage of the right meds yet. even though you know vi has explained the basics, there's no way for caitlyn to fully understand that you did need saving — and vi did save you when no one else could.

but maybe she's right, at least now. you have a home and you know what's real, and vi isn't counting the endless, violent days of incarceration on her wall, tally marks stained in blood, and no one has done any big thing wrong; no one, really, is hurt.

ekko had dragged you into taking some queer poetics seminar, mostly because he wanted to and the idea of him pressing flowers into books and then reading you poems was not wholly unappealing, and you remember a fragment: i am not someone who likes to wound.

it's quiet, for a while, between the two of them, and then vi apologizes for causing even more sensory input by getting her tears on cait's shirt, and cait laughs, and you know vi is smiling, relieved.

'you can come out now, jinx,' vi calls, and you roll your eyes but you do go out to the living room to find them curled on the couch together before caitlyn gets up and pours herself a glass of wine and opens a beer for vi. you can't ever have alcohol, not on the long list of meds you have to take, but vi had gotten you a bunch of non-alcoholic beer to try: you don't have to say it, not anymore, but sometimes you still just really want to be like your big sister. ekko's gotten really into mocktail mixology for parties, and cait has brought over non-alcoholic wine too, a bottle every now and then. love shows up in all forms, so often.

you sit in your favorite reading chair, fluffy and overstuffed, while they get situated back on the couch, and accept the glass — the beer perfectly poured, annoying — from cait before she settles in.

'all good?'

vi hums and looks at caitlyn adoringly, and caitlyn runs her thumb over the tattoo on vi's cheek.

'ooookay, i'll take that as a yes. are you sure you don't want time for some more... intimate reconciliation? i can go to ekko's or hang out on vander's patio.'

'that's okay,' caitlyn says, and vi squeezes her hand. you get it: sometimes you don't really like touch, not like vi literally always does, especially when the world already feels too close and loud and sharp. but vi is kind, and she does her best to understand, and so they sit a little ways apart, just holding hands; you turn on housewives, because you and vi had succeeded in getting caitlyn invested and you were supposed to watch the new episode tonight anyway.

they both fall asleep on the couch later, vi's head in caitlyn's lap while she runs her fingers up and down the grain of vi's soft hair, nodding off eventually. you take a picture and send it to ekko before you get up to go try to wind down to sleep.

disgusting, he texts back. love them tbh

ugh. same

[sd2006]

also HII BUDDY have we perchance found a new hyperfixation. is that a thing that is happening with all these reblogs

Oh you mean all the Dan Da Dan stuff?

Yeah! I watched the anime on netflix a few days ago and I really fucking like it!!!! I can't wait for more to come out, like I'm gonna be feral when a new episode comes out I can tell!!!

Also, lowkey a straight ship I will happily sail on!? Heck yeah! It's hard for me to find one in the media I watch that is genuinely stimulating to my brain whenever they're on screen. I genuinely hope they're canon (I haven't read the manga, so I'll have to wait for the anime to confirm for me), like I'm straight up saying "JUST KISS ALREADY!" Whenever they think about each other ^^

It's a willingly new experience for me!

[homelanderbutbig]

Watching The Snowflakes Fall (G/T Homelander x Reader)

1168 words. Pure fluff. Homelander is 8 feet tall. Reader is non-descriptive. Established relationship.

You and Homelander go walking in a winter wonderland.

In the midst of Christmas time, Vought Tower has been buzzing with activity. This is their most profitable time of year, and Homelander might as well be Santa Claus with how the holiday seems to centre around him. He's been all around the city attending Vought functions, and you're tailing behind him as his personal assistant doing your best to keep his schedule flowing smoothly. You've both been so busy that you and him have barely had a single moment to spend together as Christmas approaches.

But this was a rare night; you finished your shift earlier than him, and took some time to formulate a little plan for the two of you.

You're waiting on a bench in the park, bundled up with your thickest winter coat, mittens and toque. The sky is pitch black, and the stars are obscured by the clouds covering the ground with pure white snow. Where you are, the only source of brightness is coming from the streetlights marking the walkway. There isn't another soul in sight, and no sounds other than the slightest gust of wind.

It's perfect.

As expected, you don't have to wait by yourself for very long. You see Homelander slowly flying down to land in front of your bench. After his work day finally ended and he noticed you weren't in the Tower, he swiftly scoured the city trying to pinpoint your location.

"You didn't tell me you were leaving," he remarks bluntly, not exactly impressed at your antics. You know how anxious he gets when he can't find you.

"I know, and I'm sorry," you say, standing up to walk over to him. "But I thought maybe we could go for a little midnight stroll together? We haven't had much time to ourselves lately, and it's so nice out."

"…Now?" he questions you, his brows furrowed in absolute befuddlement. He knows you don't have as strong of a tolerance to cold as he does, why would you want to spend time out in this weather?

"Come on! It'll be fun," you coax him, reaching up to hold his hand. Of course he curls his long fingers into yours the second you touch him, engulfing your tiny hand in his expansive palm. It's been at least 24 hours since he last held your hand, practically forever for him. And he's powerless to fight against his desire for your affection, simply sighing heavily through his nose.

You can't help but smile at how quick he is to agree to whatever you have planned. You could ask him to do literally anything, and by god he'd do it just as long as you cuddle him afterwards.

You start walking down the pathway, and Homelander follows along with your lead. Your eyes are focused on the snowflakes falling overhead, dancing through the air and coating the scenery in a blanket of white. Being cooped up in the Tower all day doesn't allow you to take in this view, and peering up at Homelander makes you realize he doesn't get to either. His face is just as transfixed as yours is, the stress of his day forgotten by the near picturesque postcard surrounding the both of you.

Although you've only been out walking for a few minutes, it's already beginning to become too cold for you to handle. The frigid breeze is penetrating you through to your bones, almost mocking you as the dense fog escapes your lungs with each breath.

The way you attempt to bury your fingers further into Homelander's hand is enough for him to glance down at you. He very easily discerns your discomfort, even without his super senses.

"We should head back," he suggests, stopping in place. You're powerless to keep moving with his ironclad grip on your hand.

"N-n-no, I-I'm fine…" you eventually stammer, your teeth chattering up a storm.

"You're too cold," he counters.

"B-but I-I-I wanna s-stay out longer…" you mumble, refusing to give in to his concern as you squeeze his hand tighter. You wanted this night to be something special, something to remember. And you don't want it to end just yet, even though you can't feel your extremities anymore.

He would prefer you not be stubborn and heed his advice, at least that way you could warm up in his penthouse. However, you've always told him how special winter is for you, laughing when he disagrees. To him, it's just cold, wet, and busy. You've shared your treasured memories of this season, how calming it is watching the snowflakes fall from outside your window. And now, he finally understands what you mean. He doesn't want it to end yet either.

Instead of flying back, he takes a moment to think of a proper solution.

Gently, Homelander bends down to wrap his hands around your waist, lifting you up to his chest. His big arms are snuggly encompassing your body, with one hand splayed across your back and the other behind your head. After he makes sure you're comfortable, he continues walking.

Thankfully it doesn't take long for his body heat to warm you up, one of the benefits of his size allowing him to so easily envelop your entire form. His suit is soft from its padding, it's like being swaddled by your own personal blanket. While the rhythmic crunching of the snow under his feet is strangely relaxing, you can't see the sights with how he's holding you so close to his chest.

Once he feels you fidgeting in his arms, and eases his grip so you can pull back enough to look at him.

At least with your jacket hood, your head is protected from the snow. Homelander's head on the other hand is dusted in snowflakes, forming a little mound on his slicked back hair.

"What?" he asks confused as you giggle at him.

"You have a snowflake on your nose," you grin, kissing him on the tip of his nose to catch the one stray snowflake in your lips. Such a small act of love is enough to make him chuckle, leaving you jostling in his arms. He decides to make sure you're completely warm as he leans in for a proper kiss, letting you drown in his warmth as you both melt into each other.

"Home now?" he queries after he breaks from your kiss. His blue eyes are the perfect compliment to the yellow streetlights illuminating the two of you, sparkling just as brightly too.

"Maybe… just a little longer?" you express, raising your hand to wipe away the wet snowflakes staining his cheeks. It's funny how he seems to be even more beautiful to you right now, wearing a layer of snow.

Resting your head in the crook of his neck, you keep your eyes on the scenery as Homelander continues his stroll. If you let yourself, you swear you could fall asleep in this position. Tonight was as perfect as you thought it would be.

And maybe, you'll do it again tomorrow.

[michuga]

Kaleidoscope

summary: Supposedly, when you turn 19, sometime within that year, you meet a guy who turns your whole life upside down. Your first love, your first heartbreak. One year. 365 days, 5 hours, 49 minutes.

pairing: jeongguk x reader

content: artist reader, tattoo artist jk, use of korean name, overuse of the word 'lover', fluff, their favorite hobby is admiring eachother, angst, angst, then more angst, shared trauma, basically just life happening

warnings: cursing, pregnancy & childbirth, abortion, miscarriage

wc: 6.5k

a/n: bare with me as i try to figure out my writing style ㅠㅠ i almost cried while writing this. or maybe i got some chappell in my eyes, idk. enjoy!

.ılılılllıılılıllllıılılllıllı.

Kaleidoscope - Chappell Roan

0:24 ─●──────── 3:42 ↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺

It's funny, isn’t it? For someone who had it all figured out at 18, standing here at 23 and watching him pack his bags for the last time, you can’t help but let your mind wander. Somewhere between 18 and 23, you tumbled (on a rock, a Jeongguk shaped rock) and you’ll never be the same.

You had heard stories about “the boy you meet at 19”. Friends, family members, hell, even online communities complained about it. Supposedly, when you turn 19, sometime within that year, you meet a guy who turns your whole life upside down. Your first love, your first heartbreak. One year. 365 days, 5 hours, 49 minutes.

That was all bullshit of course.

Jeongguk was not your first love, nor your first heartbreak. Nevertheless, you know what he was? He was your first clash. Your first storm, the first rain after a long hard year of drought. there’s no other way to explain it. He didn’t sweep you off my feet or visit your house with a boombox on his shoulder begging for you back, but it all turned out just the same.

"This seat taken? All the others are." You hear a voice call out, snapping you out of your creative flow.

You look up to see the most beautiful pair of mahogany orbs you've ever seen.

You look around, most of the seats empty.

Confused, you answer, "Sure?"

He pulls out the chair in front of you, with a huge grin.

"I'm Jeongguk," He says, extending a hand for you to shake.

His t-shirt sleeves strain against his biceps, and you finally notice his inked arms. What you don't notice is holding onto his hand for a few seconds too long, entranced by the stunning artwork.

Letting go with an awkward clear of your throat, you pull your hand back to rest on your laptop's trackpad.

"You are breathtakingly beautiful, and I would've beat myself up for the next two months if I didn't talk to you."

Arriving at the Jazz bar Jimin invited you to, you scan the room to find him.

Locking eyes with him, you make your way across the room to where he's sitting.

You loved being friends with Jimin.

Jimin was charismatic, chic. Always dressed to the nines with his leather jackets and designer boots. He carried around this sense of subtle dominance, deep down he knew he controlled every room he walked in. But most importantly, he was also the gentlest friend you could ask for.

If you ever needed a shoulder to cry on or a pair of hands to hold your hair back when you throw up, Jimin made sure you knew he was always one call away. As were you, when it came to him.

"You made it! Hello, hello, hello!" Jimin chirps, extending his arms out only to engulf you in a bear hug.

"I can't wait to see Tae on stage!" You say, coming out from the hug.

The main event of the night; Taehyung, Jimin's boyfriend, was to perform a song with his band tonight.

"Come! Sit with us." Jimin says, leading you back to his table.

You notice five men already seated. Upon first glance, you didn't notice anything unusual, all of you exchanging greetings. That was until your eyes land on the last man on the far end.

"You again?" You blurt out of surprise.

"Me again. Hi beautiful." The familiar man says with that cheeky grin of his, his eyes having been already fixated on you the minute you walked through the door.

"Wait. You two know each other?" Jimin asks confused, looking back and forth between the two of you.

"You can say that.." You answer meekly, looking away.

Looking back at Jeongguk, Jimin waits for an explanation.

He only gets a shrug from the younger man and another grin from him in response as you move to sit next to him.

"No, you're gonna tell me! I want to know." Jimin complains as he sits down.

As the night went on, you and Jeongguk got to know each other more. You had always longed for the organic in relationships. An organic meeting, organic conversation, and most importantly; organic chemistry. It seemed like the man in front of you checked all your boxes.

It turns out you and Jeongguk were way more similar than either of you initially thought.

You both had this sense of freedom, like no matter what anyone told you. If you had your mind set on something, you'll make it happen, simply because you willed it so.

You carried this sense of carelessness-- no, that's not the right word. Lightness? Ease? navigating the world. Like in the end, nothing really matters. Both of you live life on a whim. You joked about hoping it wouldn't be your downfall, then laughed it off.

"Do you ever look at the stars?" You say, laying on your back, looking up to the sky.

"Do I ever look at the stars?" He slowly repeats, laying on his stomach, admiring the freckles on your face. "Hmm.."

“I don’t need the stars. I have your eyes to look at.” He answers after a few seconds of fake pondering.

“That’s so sappy oh my gooooddd”

“What can I say? You make me sappy baby.” He says with a stupid grin, brushing strands of hair away from your face.

You and Jeongguk had been dating for a month and a few weeks now. Initially scared shitless to open your heart up again, you're glad you've made that decision. You can confidently say you've never been happier.

You continue, "You don't ever like, count them? You know they're actually dead, right?"

"Dead? Whaaat? That's crazy," He says, smiling like a lovestruck idiot.

Finally shifting your focus to the man next to you, you glance sideways, “God, I love you. You’re the best thing that’s happened to me.”

It's your 1-year anniversary with Jeongguk. Both of you were inseparable at this point, where one of you went the other followed. From that point onwards, both your lifestyles tangoed and merged into one. His friend group became yours, your favorite spots became his, and everything else that could be shared, was. It was the most delicate display of intimacy; domesticity.

After taking you out to a nice romantic dinner, both of you ended up at your apartment. One of the many things shared within your relationship was your homes. This, being his second one, wasn't unfamiliar to him.

Gently tracing your curves, Jeongguk lay sideways. His head propped up on his elbow, admiring you. Opposite him, you lay on your side, reading your book.

"Watcha' readin'?" He asks in a silly tone, the very one you'd use to talk to a kid.

With a sly smirk and a brief glance at your lover, you answer him.

"Smut. Steamy, filthy smut. But after the passionate romance, of course."

"Oh? Anything in particular you'd like to recreate?" He takes on a challenging tone, slightly amused.

"Maybe."

"Can I see?"

"Nope. You'll have to figure it out yourself."

"Not even if I ask politely?"

"Nnnnope!"

And just like that, the calm before the storm ended. You had dug your grave and laid in it. All that was left now, was to await your fate-

"You cheeky little minx, come here," He says with a renewed vigor, swiftly getting on top of you and getting straight to work tickling your sides.

"Nooooo, please, please," You say breathlessly in between tickles.

You're not sure if it's physically possible to laugh your way to a six-pack, but it seemed to you that in those 30 seconds it had been made possible.

"Alright, baby please!" You yell, desperately gasping for air.

Finally freeing you from this relentless torture, Jeongguk stops. As the laughter dies down, both of you pant with stupid smiles plastered across your faces. With Jeongguk still on top of you; his weight balanced on both his arms, you stare into each others eyes.

"Y'make me feel so loved, y'know.. You're my person, gguk." You coo, affectionately brushing his hair away from his face with one of your hands.

"Thank you for trusting me enough to be that for you, baby. You make me the happiest man on this damn planet. I mean it."

"Move in with me." You blurt out.

"Okay."

"You spend most of your time here anyway, my apartment can fit both of us, you have clothes everywh- what?"

With a giggle, he repeats, "Okay. I'll move in with you"

"That easy?!" You scoff.

"Who told you it was hard?" Scrunching his nose at you, he continues, "I'd carry the sun aflame; scorching hot and all, with my bare hands for you should you ask. Are you really surprised?"

"Jesus, Shakespeare. You trying to get into my pants or something?"

"Maybe. Is it working?" Flashing you a bunny smile, he leans down to place a soft kiss on your lips.

You roll your eyes, but without an ounce of annoyance.

"For the last fucking time Jeongguk, stop leaving your clothes all over the place!" You let out, irritated.

Ignoring you, he keeps scrolling through his phone.

"Hey! Did you hear me?" You continue, waving your hands in front of his face.

"Why are you yelling right now? That's really unnecessary."

"So your answer is to ignore me?"

"You know I don't like being yelled at. Speak to me like a normal human being."

"I would, if you were behaving like one."

"Whatever," He says with a tsk.

Jeongguk isn't usually unreasonable, it was just one of those days. Both of you have those days sometimes. Now, more than usual though.

"I asked you to move in with me because I love you. Now stop being a child and pick your damn clothes up." You spit, tossing his shirt that was once sprawled out on the floor, in his face.

A few hours later, both of you head out to meet your friends.

Arriving at the hangout spot, you and Jeongguk take your seats next to your friends.

"There you are, lovebirds!" Hoseok yells out excitedly, standing up to greet you.

The drinks kept coming. You could handle your liquor, but you knew Jeongguk couldn't exactly do the same.

A steady stream of alcohol was maintained. One drink, two drinks, then the next, and the next.. He gulped them down with ease one after the other, until he was slurring his words.

"And then I told him; that can't possibly be right, you're not exactly the brightest" Jimin says, the entire table bursting into laughter at his story.

"How are you guys? Enjoying the domestic life together? Tae asks, slowly sipping his drink next to Jimin.

Silently glancing over to Jeongguk, you brace yourself as you watch him prepare to speak.

"Loooooove this one," He blurts with a lopsided smile, throwing his free arm around your shoulder. "Always has to keep the house all neat and tidy,"

"Baby, you've had a bit too much to drink, yeah? I think we'll head out now guys."

Noticing the awkward shift in the air, the guys agree with you and tell you it's fine, gesturing for you to get up.

"It's not like y-you always pay attention t'me. W-why do you only pay attention when you're- scolding me?" Jeongguk continues, in between hiccups.

"C'mon. Up you go," You say ignoring him, wrapping your hands around his torso to get him up.

With Taehyung's help, you finally manage to lay Jeongguk's (very heavy) body across the backseat of his car.

"Thanks, Tae. God knows I would've ruptured a disc had I attempted that alone."

"It's really no problem, cupcake. Make sure to text us when you get home safe, alright?"

With a sigh and a nod, you get into the driver's seat.

"Why are you being like this?" You murmur, starting the car.

One of your favorite past times with Jeongguk is spending time together doing your own thing. It's the best and most efficient way to get things done while silently supporting the other. It also tells you a lot about how comfortable and safe you make each other feel. You have nurtured this relationship so carefully, and watched it blossom into what you have now. Jeongguk knows this, he knows how at ease you feel during these simple, mundane times.

What you haven't told him though, is you have something you enjoy more.

Secretly admiring him as he works.

Sometimes when he's fully immersed in the task at hand, you secretly stop what you're doing and just stare at him. There were times you even pretended to do something, just so he can get busy and fail to notice your piercing gaze.

You can't help it. In your eyes, he's perfection itself.

So this time, as he was typing up an essay, you grabbed your sketchbook and got to work.

Spilling ink to fill the blacks of his eyes, carving out the beautiful slant of his nose, the little mole under his lip.. His sweet honeyed features come together to breathe life into your drawing.

This isn't the first time you draw him. Time and time again, you've tried to mimic his essence on paper. You're not one to brag, but you'd like to think you're a good artist. Great even, from what your professors have told you; but try as you may, you have never once been successful. No amount of charcoal or white highlights on the canvas in your hands could capture a glimmer of your lover's warmth.

"Is that.. is that me?" You hear a voice say, snapping you from your thoughts.

Whoops.. Guess you got careless and accidentally drowned in his eyes for real this time.

Your cheeks turn a rich shade of crimson as you shyly nod.

Sliding his laptop off his lap and taking his glasses off, he asks, "Can I see?"

Reluctantly, you hand him the sketchbook.

"It's not finished.. I was gonna shade some more and add highlights-"

He flips through the pages, looking at the earlier pages.

"Wait!" Leaning over, you try to grab the sketchbook from his hands. However, he manages to swiftly move his body, lifting the sketchbook out of your reach.

Nevermind that he caught you drawing him, that entire sketchbook was filled with sketches of him.

Finally reaching the first page, his eyes scan the page to read the words written in cursive,

"୨୧ Jeongguk Sketchbook ୨୧"

He stayed silent for a few minutes.

"Baby.. Are you mad at me?" You ask, concerned. With a bite of your lip, you anxiously wait for him to say something.

"I'm gonna marry you one day," He says, looking into your eyes in awe.

"I wish my professors reacted that enthusiastically upon seeing my work," You giggle, relieved. "Also, is that a threat?"

"It's a promise," He says with a roll of his eyes, fighting a grin.

Settling into his accustomed place between your thighs, he gets on top you.

"You have an essay to write. No funny business, mister." You jokingly scold, patting his butt with your foot.

"Okay mom," He says with a smile as he starts kissing all over your face.

"Nooo, why'd you have to say that before kissing meee" You whine, turning your head left and right to avoid his kisses.

Scrolling through your phone, you wait at the tattoo parlor Jeongguk works at for him to be done with his client.

Handing you a bottle of water, Yoongi takes a seat next to you.

"He'll be out in a few. Just wrapping the client's tattoo." He informs you.

"Can I see that?" You gesture to the tattoo book on the table, "Jeongguk" written on the cover.

Handing you the book, he starts, "Quite the talented one, your boyfriend. We have lots of artists, but his work really is a sight for sore eyes. Clients usually go for him."

With a giddy smile, you open the book, "You know when I first met him, his tattoos were the first thing that caught my eye. Not to brag but, I don't doubt any of that for a second."

Chuckling, Yoongi gets up. "I'll be in my office if you need anything."

With an appreciative nod, you thank him.

Feeling the couch take a dip, you smell him before you can see him.

"Hi baby," He takes a seat next to you.

"Hi my love," You lean in to kiss him. "I knew you were talented but holy shit, your hands were kissed by angels."

"The only angel that's ever kissed them is sitting next to me. So you're right, I guess." He says, nodding in agreement.

Tracing the lines in the book, you stare in awe. It seems your lover renders you speechless most of the time you're with him.

"Soo... I did a thing," Jeongguk says as he enters your shared apartment, taking off his shoes.

"Uh-oh."

"No uh-oh. C'mere," He beckons with his hand, buzzing with anticipation.

Turning off the stove, you make your way over to him.

"Close your eyes,"

"Okay, now I'm scared."

"Hurry uuupppp."

Placing your palms over your eyes, you reluctantly obey.

"No, not your hands. Give them to me."

Suspicious, you keep your eyes shut and reach out your hands for him to take.

You hear the sound of fabric shuffling, then feel your fingers touch warm skin.

Warm.. engraved skin?

"You can open them now."

Your jaw hangs open.

"Oh baby, That's beautiful.." You say, your eyes welling up with tears.

Staring back at you is your birth flower, tattooed on Jeongguk's side below his ribs.

"Since you were so in love with my designs, I thought I'd make you one your own."

Chuckling, you reply, "Shouldn't it be on my body then?"

"You make a good point, but my body is yours, so by extension, this tattoo is also yours."

"Okay smarty pants." You say with a smile, wiping away the tears rolling down your face. "Let's go watch a movie."

One kiss. Two kisses.

"Baby.." He says, turning his head away.

"Let me make you feel good. Just relax." You graze your hand along his chest.

With a sigh, he sits up, letting your hands fall.

Frustrated, you get up.

"How much rejection can I take?" Finally fed up, you burst. "How many times are you gonna shut me out?" This hadn't been the first time Jeongguk denied you. He's been mentally withdrawn from you for a few weeks, coming up with one excuse or another.

He rubs at his temples.

"I try and I try and I try. You don't talk to me about what bothers you, you barely touch me anymore.. What am I supposed to do, Jeongguk? You're with me but you're not even here." Desperate for an answer, you plead.

"I already told you. I'm taking more courses this semester, and Yoongi wants me to work extra shifts at the parlor. Not exactly an aphrodisiac for me."

"Baby, stress will always be a part of our lives. You have to lean on me when it gets hard, that's what relationships are for. We're a team now, you can't keep shutting me out like this."

You had always been upfront with Jeongguk about the importance of communication within your relationship. You could handle just about anything, but not this.

Crackle. Pop.

It was New Year's Eve, you heard fireworks go off outside your home.

At almost midnight, you were waiting for your boyfriend to come back.

Sitting under your skylight, you admire the show in the sky. The light illuminates your face as you gaze up.

You feel your phone vibrate in your lap.

J<3: "Working late."

J<3: "Don't wait up."

Life had a funny yet cruel sense of irony. Everyone was out celebrating, while over here, it seemed like your whole life was coming to an end.

After what feels like hours of dreary silence, you hear the front door open. He's home.

Nervously pacing back and forth in your shared bathroom, you wait for him to come into the bedroom.

God, it wasn't supposed to happen like this.

You hear footsteps. Turning around, you meet his eyes.

"I'm pregnant." You say abruptly, with bloodshot eyes and tear-stained cheeks.

At 21, this is the last thing you expected to happen. It seems you had gotten careless. Young and in love.

After a few moments of utter silence, both of you sit side by side on your bathroom floor.

"Fuck. Fuck, okay. Fuck."

You burst into tears for the third time that night.

"I'm not ready.. we're not ready.. Can't believe this is really happening.. ggukie, what are we gonna do? m' so scared"

"Hey, hey, hey.. It's okay. We'll get through this. You hear me, baby? We're gonna be alright. It's okay. I've got you. As long as we both have each other, nothing else matters." He reassures, pulling you both into the bathtub, cradling you into his chest.

"Sure it's happening sooner than we thought, but this was the plan all along angel, wasn't it? hm?" He says softly, wiping away your tears. "We'll get married, once you pop out this little one we can get a house in the suburbs.. My parents can help us out financially.. My love, look at me. Deep breaths."

You calm down, finally catching your breath. You had forgotten you weren't gonna be alone in this. You felt as long as you had Jeongguk, you were ready to face anything.

"What about school?" You ask.

"You can take a gap year. I'll drop some classes and make sure I'm by your side."

"I'm gonna be a dad." He says after a long silence. You feel tears wetting your shirt, unsure whose they were.

And maybe it was going to be alright. Because you were in his arms. Carrying his child, you were going to have your own family. With the man you love.

You finally allow yourself to feel excitement. The joy of becoming a mother. You allow yourself to feel hope, the kind that comes with the promise of a seedling sprouting from the dirt.

One thing you admired about him was his humility. Perhaps one of the most powerful things he does is; at his best and most successful, my baby comes back home and kneels before me. Looking up at me, I see in his eyes everything I ever prayed, could pray, and would ever pray for.

My lover never once forgot me. No matter what it was, he always shared it with me. Not once has he ever treated me as less than.

"Baby! Guess what I gooot!" You hear the front door shut.

Truthfully, things had gotten better after your big news. Remarkably better. Jeongguk had been paying extra attention to you, making sure you’re well tended to, fed, comfortable.. It was almost like how you two were in the beginning. When it was still fresh.

Running into your room excitedly like a little kid, Jeongguk holds up a pair of baby socks.

"Look how adorable!" He exclaims, eye twinkling.

Smiling fondly, you entertain him as you rub your already swollen belly.

"I can't believe they make socks that tiny." You reply with a soft chuckle.

"I know, right? I didn't even know someone's feet can be this tiny!"

At 3 months pregnant, things weren't as bad as you had initially expected. You had taken a gap year, like Jeongguk suggested, and both of you were doing just fine.

Having him by your side made everything so much easier, and you wondered why you ever thought you couldn't do this. Being his lover and the mother of his child was the easiest and most natural thing for you.

Unrequited

/ʌnrɪˈkwʌɪtɪd/

adjective

(of a feeling, especially love) not returned.

Can love be one sided?

A question I'm sure has been passed around for centuries past. After all, I'm sure you're familiar with the term "unrequited love".

So can it be?

Well, I don't think so.

I believe people who claim it, mislabel infatuation. Love can never be one sided. As far as I'm concerned, in order to fall in love, both sides have to have experienced their fair share of vulnerable moments. Human moments. For the word "love" to be spoken and for it to be real, it has to exist tangibly, undeniably, between two people. Love does not shy away and hide, love stands tall and proud; like the biggest elephant any room has seen.

If there really is love on one side, it's mirrored on the other side as well.

Some may argue, the term "unrequited" still stands, because the other person may feel love, but not the romantic kind intended; I beg to differ. Love, no matter its form, will warm you from the inside out. To deny its existence on the other side merely because you don't like how it takes shape and presents itself, is a selfish act of fraud.

As usual, good things don't last.

You like to think the love was there. It really, irrefutably, was. And most days, that's what get helps you get by. After all, the life growing inside you was proof of it. Or was, anyway.

Looking at your bathroom mirror, you see a woman you don't recognize.

You have the same eyes, but hers are weighed down with dark rings. Where you once saw a bright curious girl, stands a woman foreign, burdened with tribulations; the aftermath of adolescence.

Turning to the side, you lift your shirt up to reveal your stomach. You lightly ghost your hand over your abdomen. Pang in your chest, sting in your eyes. Breathe, 1, 2, 3.

You walk into your shared bedroom to find Jeongguk seated on the bed with his phone in hand.

Your steps coming to a halt, you look up at him. With dead eyes, you mumble quietly, "I lost the baby."

"What was that?" He asks, unable to quite make out what you were saying.

"I lost the baby," You repeat, loud enough for him to hear this time.

Frozen in shock, he stares at you with wide eyes.

"..What?" He says with a whisper, tears instantly flooding his eyes.

You stay silent.

"Are you- Are you sure??" He asks with urgency, immediately springing up from the bed to stand infront of you.

With a slow and apprehensive nod you reply, "Just got back from a checkup."

Jeongguk raises his hand to rub his face. You flinch.

Mortified, Jeongguk looks at you with wide eyes.

"Did- baby did you just flinch? What the fuck?" He says, hurt written all over his face.

You slide down the wall behind you, needing anything to stabilize you. Of course you weren't expecting him to hit you. Were you? You don't know anymore. Your body has become foreign to you, and you curse it for always betraying you throughout your years. This time, it had been the biggest betrayal of all.

Jeongguk immediately reaches to grab your weak body, kneeling on the ground with you.

He takes you in his embrace once more, and a cruel, ironic sense of Déjà vu washes over you. Once more, you lie in each others arms. Only last time marked a beginning, this time marked the end.

But the love was there. Right?

If Jeongguk hadn't been touching you as much before, now he really didn't, at all. It's not that he didn't try, he has, a few times. But you really, really can't bring yourself to let him touch you right now. When you shared that with him, he understood, he really did. But after all, how long can someone be understanding, until they finally realize, they've had enough?

"It's been months.. I understand how you feel, and it's no easy thing what we just went through. What you went through. You're so strong, mama. So strong."

Mama. You could almost hear the crack in your heart.

"I don't wanna sound like an asshole, and I'll never, ever force you; so long as I draw breath.. but baby I long for you. I just want to connect with you like we used to.. I ache for your touch. I know it's not easy, but can you please try?"

"I know, I know. I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry," You whisper, averting your gaze to the floor with tears in your eyes.

"I think we should take a break." You blurt out, breaking the silence.

"What?"

"I need a break."

"From me?" He asks, voice coming out more fragile than intended. Jeongguk knew your relationship has become rocky to say the least, but what he wasn't expecting was this.

You stay silent.

"Okay.. If that's what you need." He lets out, defeated.

Getting up, you grab a suitcase and start packing clothes.

"Where are you going?" Alarmed, he instinctively gets up to follow you.

"To Jimin's."

Agonizing silence.

"Do you have to do this?"

"Yes."

You feel suffocated. You've heard of post-miscarriage hormones, and you don't know if that was what was causing your recent irritability, but it seemed like everything and everyone around you annoyed you. Never in your life would you have imagined that would include Jeongguk. You hated yourself for it. You tell your lover everything, but this one secret you were prepared to take to the grave.

"You're welcome to sleep with other people, if you'd like."

"You really need to stop making these decisions all on your own." He says, sounding fed up. "I don't fucking want to be with anyone else. Do you really think it's about the sex for me?"

Angrily stomping over to you, he gently grabs your face, forcing you to look into his eyes.

"Do you really think, all I want is a fucking nut?" Laughing in disbelief, he lets go of your face, ruffling his hair in frustration. "I want you. You."

Biting your lip, you grab your suitcase and make your way to the front door and text Jimin to let him know.

You hear a sigh and footsteps behind you. "Here, let me." Jeongguk says, taking ahold of your suitcase before you can argue.

With a small smile, you follow behind him. Even when he's hurt, he takes care of you.

You get in your car. Adjusting the mirror, you see Jeongguk looking back at you in the reflection. Forcing yourself to look away, you start driving.

Making your way inside Jimin's apartment, both of you take a seat on his couch, setting your suitcase beside you.

"What happened?" Jimin asks hesitatingly, scared to set you off. He knows of everything that happened the past few months, upset with you after realizing you had hid it from him for a while. He wasn't upset with you, but rather the fact that you had endured it alone all this time. But he understood. He could never blame you.

"We had a fight. Well, sort of," You explain with a sigh. "I told him I needed a break."

"Is it okay if I hug you?"

Upon your immediate approval, Jimin leaps into your embrace.

"I don't know where to begin," He starts, voice muffled by your clothes. Slowly pulling away, he catches your eyes.

"You've had it so hard. So hard." Tearing up, he continues, "If a break is what you need, I'll gladly support it. I may not always fully understand what you're going through, but know you always always have my full support regardless."

Seeing your angel of a friend cry, tears are brought to your eyes as well.

"Why are you crying? Aren't I supposed to be the one doing that?" You say, chuckling.

"So I can't cry now? Let me cry, woman!" Matching your energy, he replies.

You would never admit it to the man waiting for you at home, but within the confinements of your best friend's living room, you finally allow yourself to speak it aloud.

"Looking at him reminds me of what happened. He reminds me of her."

With a knowing nod, Jimin takes your hand in his.

"Our baby. God, Jimin, I couldn't stand to be in that room a minute longer."

You're glad you had your best friend alongside you all these years. Seeing you in all your states, he's the one person you can truly call family. Love like this, you were sure of. Love like this, you could never let go of. Love like this, you've learned to truly cherish.

You spent a little over a week at Jimin's.

You and Jeongguk hadn't been talking, and you noticed he was spending longer and longer hours away at night. Tonight you decided, enough is enough.

"Where the fuck have you been?" You spit out like venom, spotting the messy haired man at the front door. After waiting all night for Jeongguk to finally come back home, your voice had gained an edge.

"Does it fucking matter?" He answers, matching your vulgarity. A habit both of you, unfortunately, picked up.

"It's 4 am. You left without a word and now you smell like an entire fucking candy shop. Think I don't know what you get up to?" Because like any human being, despite making it clear you were okay with him sleeping with other people, the very idea broke whatever was left of your heart into tinier fragments.

You continue, "You think the loss of our babygirl hasn't impacted me? It hurt me the most. As I was sitting here, grieving your fucking child, you were out fucking whores. Instead of being with me and helping us get through it, you fucking bailed on me. You abandoned our relationship. You abandoned me."

"Watch your mouth. That's not fair. That is not fair. I have never unfaithful to you. We haven't been fine for a damn long time and you know it."

You knew you weren't being fair. You knew he wouldn't cheat on you, either. But you couldn't stop. You couldn't bring yourself to stop. You had reached the point of no return, and all your anger had come up to the surface to breathe. Claws, sharp edges and all, 'I am here. I am here.' it screamed.

“That doesn’t mean you stay out all night every single day and pretend I don’t fucking exist! If you want to break up, grow a pair and fucking say it to my face.”

"Frankly, that's none of your concern. You lost the right to what I did a long time ago."

If it weren't for the four years you've known this man, you would've missed the slight stutter in his words. You've memorized every freckle, every curve, every dimple.

"Are you drunk?" You ask slowly. Your anger dialing up to 100.

Ignoring you, he makes a beeline for the spare bedroom door. Where he had been sleeping for the past- you can’t even remember how long it’s been.

You don't know when you reached this point. It was all sunshine and rainbows, then it all went downhill. Well, you can't say it was sudden. To tell the truth, you and Jeongguk's relationship has been strained for a long time.

Upon asking him to move in with you, you had thought being in close proximity with your lover would make you grow closer. On the contrary, within the same four walls and under the same roof, you had never felt further from the person you were supposed to love for the rest of your life.

"Iseul."

He stops in his tracks.

"That's the name I had picked out for her. Iseul."

Turning around, Jeongguk looks at you as if you had just slapped him.

"That's a beautiful name," He murmurs.

"She would've been ours. Would've looked just like you, to a T. I bet she would've had your beautiful big eyes."

"She would've had your laugh.." He chokes out, tears flooding.

"We were supposed to get married and grow old together. What has become of us? Since when were we like this?

"Shit baby, I don't know. I don't know." Slowly walking over to you, he pulls your head in his chest. He holds you with the same frailty he used to. Back when you were younger. Back when he loved you. When you loved each other. It seems like nowadays all you do is fight.

Your communication has gone to shit. It was like both of you were speaking a language the other couldn't understand.

"We had something didn't we?" You whisper into his chest, your tears staining his shirt. "We loved each other, at some point, right?"

“Of course we did, baby. Of course we did. What we had, though humble, was real and I would never change it. The love was there."

He continues, "You’re gonna find so much better. you’re gonna have so much greater. We’re not meant for each other. God knows what we went through wasn’t easy. it was fucking hell. We fought tooth and nail to get here, I know your pain. I’ve seen your pain, it is mine too. Maybe it isn't fair to say this, but we need to get out of this bubble. Long as we keep coming back here, we’ll always be reminded of all the hurt and the pain. We both need fresh starts. We deserve it."

"Is this really happening? This is really happening. Oh god. Oh my god." Feeling a panic attack coming on, you try to take deep breaths.

Jeongguk hugs you tighter, gently stroking your back.

"That's it baby, breathe. Breathe, lover, breathe. Nice and slow, just like that. There we go, my love."

It passes, but the heartache doesn't, so you settle for keeping your face nestled into his chest, crying your heart out.

You love him. Oh god, you love him like you breathe air. But he's right, neither of you can live like this.

"I wish I hated you. You asshole, I wish you made me hate you." Weakly punching his chest repeatedly, you sob into his chest. "Would've made things so much easier."

Gently stroking your hair, he softly hums.

"Thank you for making this decision for both of us. God knows I'm not strong enough to leave."

"It's because I love you so much, I can't bare to see you like this. It kills me every waking fucking day."

Stepping away from your embrace, Jeongguk retreats to your bedroom.

Looking at him confused, you sniffle.

"Lovesong" by Adele blares through your apartment.

Stepping back out, he approaches you again.

"Come here, love."

Extending a hand out to you, he invites you to dance.

And so you did.

I hope my lover never forgets me.

Bonus

Silence.

You were once a teenager with loud thoughts. Loud, angry, vengeful. You were so, so angry. Now there's just silence.

Listening to the ocean waves crash against the rocks, you admire the scenery in front of you. Even in their violence, it seems to you that those very waves kiss the surface of the rocks, only to retreat in shyness. How romantic.

Was the ocean always this beautiful?

a/n: please let me know what you think! truthfully, i think i could've added more of my writing (beyond narration, i mean), but i didn't want to leave this rotting in my drafts for too long. if there's one thing i learned about being a creative, hiding your creativity, refusing to share it with the world, or putting it off is not only a waste; but you're denying beautiful, alike souls the pleasure of enjoying your work ♡

[ghostmoon1]

You know what, to start the year off, Imma make this lil appreciation post.

Now it's only been like, less than a year since I joined Tumblr about, I've been writing and drawing for years before this point, but the community here, especially the CoD community which I am mainly apart of just made me feel amazing. Everyone I've met here are some of the nicest people.

I have gotten my old hobbies back, giving me reason to write and draw again which have majorly helped with my own mental health, and now I just wanted to give the amazing people a shout out to start the year off, to hopefully make peoples days, and to just let them know that I appreciate yall!

In no specific order :3 and if you don't wanna be pinged again by me, please let me know and I won't!! No harm done, I hope this is okay :) and this is prob gonna be cringe or smt.. all sappy but like.Yeah here yall are lmao-

Putting them under the cut as there are a few :3

@gomzdrawfr - You've been a massive influence since I joined the CoD community, I adored your art from the very start, and your just such a sweet and kind person, one that I'm so thankful to have met, and so proud to be able to call you my friend. You're the first proper friend I've made here, and I can't tell you how much our talks make me smile every single time. And I'm also so thankful for the community you have sorta helped me get into, you've helped me feel comfortable interacting with more people here :3

@shadeops21 - You were honestly the person that got me to join Tumblr! I was looking for something to try and make my own Konig cosplay (that's been given up on bc motivation and Tik Tok just. yeahhh) and I found you, and all your amazing work! I basically made my account to see if you'd make any more, cause I just love what you do so much, it's got to be so helpful for so many people!!

@sleepyconfusedpotato - After Shadeops, you were the very second person I found here! And oh my gosh how much I obsessed (and still do) over your art, especially Jade. You inspired me to write my first ever fic on here, actually, where I made my first CoD oc ship with Soap, your art and what you do honestly helped me feel comfortable making something like that for myself, cause some of the toxic people on Tik Tok made me uneasy and unsure about that lol- And now, I finally have an OC I'm working in depth on, and you're my biggest reason to thank for that.

@soaps-mohawk - Your writing has inspired me so much, and I couldn't thank you enough for making your wonderful fic. I may not be like, a OG, but I've been there since around chapter 20 I think? I could be wrong, but half way through sorta. You are the biggest reason I started writing again here, you just create masterpieces. And this is the first time I've ever been hooked into a fic so much, and what got me into liking the Omegaverse (you hooked me and I can't let go of it now...) Thank you for taking your time with your writing, and thank you for all the inspiration you have given me.

@on-a-lucky-tide - Oh my gosh how much you have yanked me into the Nikprice community. I adore every single one of your writing pieces, and honestly, you are another who has helped inspire me to write more. All your writing is so filled with emotion and love, I want to be able to do that as well. Your a wonderful person, I've seen you interact with this community and everyone, and I just adore you as a person and all the hard work you put time and effort into creating.

@rainyrambles-overcod - I adore your oc's and rambles so much!! And I couldn't tell you how happy it makes me to have a friend that is okay with the tag games, I never know who to tag for those sorta things, but I actually feel okay tagging you and they are so fun and always brighten my mood :3 Keep creating, I can't wait to see what else you come up with. Thank you for all the tag games and fun!!

@nekrosmos - Yet another that has helped drag me into the Nikprice community or cult ig that too. Your art is absolutely amazing, I truly want to be able to draw like you do. Just everything about your art has me in awe, the emotion, the style, the love everything. Seeing your art brings me so much happiness! Oh and your writing is BEAUTIFUL. That also brings me joy to take a little time out of my day to sit and read the time and effort you put into everything, and how kind of a person you are. I always hope you'll keep creating, and always remember how much joy you bring both myself and others.

@daredaredoodles - I know we don't interact a whole lot, but you honestly mean a lot to me still. You were my first ever mutual on this site, and I will be forever grateful for this. Personally its anxiety that stops me from barging into peoples Dm's and talking, but yeah. Thank you for that, even if it is only a small thing.

@cricricorner - you were my first follower, and I still see you in my notifications from time to time, which always brings me joy! It's wonderful to see your followers still interact with your content, and I couldn't say how grateful I am. I couldn't tell you how happy I was to gain my first follower here, so thank you for taking your time to read my writing and see my art.

@daydreamsareallineed - You were pretty much the first person to show so much interest in my main fic!! And oh my gosh I couldn't ever tell you how much joy it brought me to read your comments, to have someone so interested in my writing, that personally I didn't even think was that good. I haven't given up completely on the fic dw, I'll hopefully update it soon! Motivation just go brrr. Thank you so much for all your support, it means the world to me.

And another shoutout to everyone who supports me, who follows me, and to every single one of you that like and reblog my content. I look through every single note I receive, I assure you none of you are left out.

And my final shoutout to everyone that creates on this site. The community here is like nothing I've ever experienced before. I adore scrolling through everyone's art, it all makes my day. I've never felt so comfortable and unjudged before. Thank you to everyone who contributes to this, you all make my day <3

This turned out a lot longer than I meant it to be- but I just wanted to share how I felt with this new year. I'm sorry if you'd rather not be pinged-

But have a lovely day :3 I love you all!!