#I can't really tag the rest of the other fandoms though I'm pretty sure any of the other fandoms can be searched

[the-indie-owl]

My Very First Try doing a Meme List off of DeviantArt to post it here on Tumblr.

I tend to have a lot of Male Characters when it comes to certain media that I have some Personal Bias Standards to, but when it's a Few Male Characters (either the Ones that I do have a Crush on (ex; Bolok or Poseidon) or just the ones that I think are Handsome and don't have a crush on (ex; Pedri and Ballister)).

Here is a List of some Personal Male Characters from Media that I have seen that I think are Either Attractive or just maybe Born-Handsome.

(And yes, this might be filled with Young Men and also DILFs, so please be very warned about this).

Also, Please Be Respectful and Don't Judge Me just because I happened to have a Weird Type.

Pedri Nanezgani (Ava's Demon)

King Poseidon (SpongeBob SquarePants)

King Neptune (SpongeBob SquarePants)

Lucien Bolok (Space Goofs)

Fujimoto (Ponyo)

Prince Lir (The Last Unicorn)

Viktor (Arcane)

Arktos (Tabaluga)

Hamegg (Osamu Tezuka)

A Tie between Raoul and Erik (The Phantom of The Opera)

Francoeur (A Monster In Paris)

Crowley (Good Omens)

Ballister Boldheart (Nimona)

Howl Jenkins Pendragon (Howl's Moving Castle)

Zmey Gorynych (The Last Bride of Zmey Gorynych)

Lord Licorice (Candyland)

Silas (The Graveyard Book)

Jareth (Labryinth)

Hades (Lore Olympus)

Wilson (Don't Starve)

Honorable Mentions:

Captain James Hook (Peter Pan (2003))

Von Rothbart (Tchaikovsky's "Swan Lake") (No matter the version)

Tuls Tenebrose (Ava's Demon)

No Heart (Care Bears)

The Baron (Whisper of The Heart)

Not Pictured:

Dr. Habit (Smile For Me)

Sir Carrot (Cucumber Quest)

Cyrano De Bergerac (Edmond Rostand's "Cyrano")

HIM (The Powerpuff Girls) (Both 90s and Anime, PPGZ)

(I might have more than just a few on the list, but if I do think of Another Fictional Male Character, I'll probably continue on editing this list).

Original Meme By Duckyworth

[rynnthefangirl]

Hi, so actually not liking the strong boys doesn't make me less of a fan of Aegon and Viserys than you. Maybe I have my reasons for not liking three plot devices that it was pretty clear weren't going to live, maybe not liking a character doesn't affect my opinions on another character you know?

And seriously call out...how childish is that? I remind you and every strong boys stan that hating/ disliking/ not caring about them is allowed and perfectly legal.

And I'm not going to question your status as an Aegon and Viserys fan but saying that he is the worst of Rhaenyra's children?? Viserys? Wouldn't Rhaenyra hate you for saying that one of her babies is the worst? Or that only applies to Aegon and Viserys...I believe it applies to Aegon a little bit less since he saw his mother dying and the fandom can make his saddnes about her exclusively even though he was depressed and guilty since what he believed was Viserys' death (let's forget about his father dying too and stormcloud...and his half brothers because yes I don't like them but that doesn't make me blind to the things happening in the book) that was provoked by the great mastermind Jace...that sent two boys alone to another continent while the rest of the siblings could remain safely on westeros how curious is that, and of course the famous worshipped his elder half brothers (but let's forget everything it says after that very conveniently).

So next time feel free to not call anyone out on being a fake fan because the very same thing can be done to you with a lot more reasons than oh you hate the strong boys shame on you.

Oh and I'm sending this on anon because I've already seen a lot of strong boys fans defenders bully and harass people that don't like them because they are the holy cows that can't receive any criticism.

I mean the main point of my original post was to express my confusion as to why the Velaryon boys (that is their legal last name btw, not Strong) would receive such vitriol from anyone other than Team Greens stans who hate them for being Rhaenrya’s sons. You mentioned them being just plot devices, and sure I can see why someone would think that. But I feel that way about book!Helaena, that she is just a personality-less plot device whose only role is to be the “Team Green victim”, and yet I don’t actively hate her— I simply don’t care about her at all. And my post was especially targeted at people who don’t simply dislike the Velaryon boys, but viscerally despise them. Like I saw one post taking about the need to “cleanse the throne of bastard blood” from an Aegon III fan, and that’s just really weird to me. I see enough bigotry cosplay from TG stans, I don’t much care to see it in the Aegon III tag. Of course, people have the right to post what they want and I’m certainly not saying they can’t. But likewise I have the right to post about my dislike of the takes that I see.

But you are right, disliking the Velaryon boys doesn’t automatically make you less of an Aegon and Viserys fan. I was more just being dramatic because of how I’m unable to wrap my head around why Aegon and Viserys fans would hate them so much. Like who you like though, dislike who you dislike, none of this is that serious.

I do what to expand on what I said about Viserys II though. It’s interesting because the quote you pulled was from a long and passionate post I wrote defending Viserys. I said Viserys was the worst of Rhaenyra’s sons, and my main reasoning for that is that none of them ever did anything so bad as doom their daughter to a marriage to a psychopathic r*pist who ultimately kills her. BUT, I would also say that Viserys II is the BEST of Rhaenyra’s sons. None of them ever did anything so great as rebuild the realm in the wake of the Dance of Dragons, devoting their life to bringing peace and prosperity and stability to the people of Westeros. My whole point it’s ridiculous to compare a man who lived nearly 50 years, had three kids, and ran the realm for decades to three teenagers who died before they ever got a chance to rule anything. Of course Viserys has done both more great and more bad things than his half brothers. He’s the best and the worst of them, and that’s what makes him interesting. I don’t need to whitewash his flaws because I’m not interested in comparing him to anyone. It’s not a competition on who is better or worse— I’d rather leave that attitude in the TB vs TG discourse. Even me saying that he’s the “best” or the “worst” isn’t really accurate to what I’ve trying to convey because again the whole point is that there is no comparison to be had.

[evelhak]

I felt implicitly tagged by @lilypheria. Here's the template too.

It may seem like I only write KnB these days but I don't consider myself to be done with my SPOP comics yet.

Tagging all my writer friends but I'm going to mention @active-mind-15 because you're kind of new to me. But I really want to hear about all my writer mutuals and followers. By the way if you've written one unfinished fic or tried to start to write your ideas but can't, or haven't written for years, or have any other struggle that makes you feel invalid, you count as a writer.

Going to elaborate under the cut because I felt like it.

My old account was FinFanFun, a Finnish site I used mostly for reading Facebook wall fics about that which should not be named.

AO3 is where I publish my KnB fics though I've considered branching out to see if there's still some fandom corners I haven't reached.

I'm slowly introducing myself to writing smut but the only story I've published has been called mild and soft smut or smut-ish, and I doubt the rest will be much different.

I frequently beta-read for friends, though fanfiction is the minority.

I used to have two beta-readers but they're unable to do it anymore so all my fics rely solely on me for now, which makes me really anxious sometimes. I am pretty desperate for a new beta-reader so if KagaKuro and a million words of "homework" doesn't frighten you, please jump into an adventure with me!

All my fics are self-indulgent in that they're what I want to see play out in the story. They are not personal fantasies, or necessarily what I want to see in real life, but it's what I envision for these characters.

I'm always reading old favourite fics again and I need to branch out actually.

If I'm in need of a short fic to read I will probably pick fluff.

Have written m/m and f/f (and m/? and m/f) but honestly it's weird to put them in the same category when m/m is so overrepresented.

I'm not actually sure if I consider fanfiction as a genre or rather a medium, because all genres exist inside fanfiction. Medium is probably more true but I seem to have checked it anyway because I feel like the point here is whether fanfiction is valid literature and that it is.

I don't know if two fandoms with one being dormant would be considered multifandom so maybe no.

I do anxiously wait for feedback since I'm very community oriented but I'm also very introverted and internally motivated so the lack of it doesn't discourage me. I have patience and I can wait for connection for years and years. Not that lack of connection doesn't affect me, of course it does, but giving up is just a very antithetical concept to my beliefs and life.

I have one on-going long KnB story and one unfinished She-Ra fic that is waiting for a better time. Which is an exception since I tend to finish what I start before moving on.

Editing fanfiction is actually not as bad as editing original fiction because I put much less pressure on myself, partially because you can always edit your fic again.

Always listening to hours long conversations in my head between characters when I'm trying to sleep. They're really bad at shutting up and I'm supposed to remember this stuff in the morning?

I was mildly drunk for ten days straight to write Anything Can Happen. Haven't done that since but it was really fun.

My main KnB storyline gets most of my attention. It's just my thing, I pour everything into it.

I didn't check 'wants to be a professional writer' because after three traditionally published books I consider myself to be that already. I actually went the other way around than seems to be the norm: I was an original fiction writer first and then branched out to fanfiction in my twenties. I can see it greatly affects how I write fic, and it's probably the main reason I feel like a bit of an outsider.

[agentrouka-blog]

Is it really anon hate, or is it just someone on anon asking you a question that you know you can't answer without acknowledging your double standards?

And while I don't deny I'm a coward for doing this on anon, maybe it wouldn't be a bad thing for you and others to examine what kind of environment you've created, either intentionally or unintentionally, where many of your fellow Sansa fans, people in your own fandom, don't feel comfortable saying these things to you under their own name, for fear they'll get dog-piled, ridiculed, and called "fake Sansa fans."

(post referenced) (I think.)

That post wasn't actually related to fandom at all but to someone else being dog-piled by aggressive anons after posting incendiary antisemitic content, and then blaming me for it. It made me want to make a statement about how anon hate is always wrong. I don't send anon hate and I don't approve of it being sent by others.

I don't recall getting any fandom-related hate recently, apart from someone accusing me of occupying a high horse, which, you know, if they feel that way, I must accept that.

If you've recently sent me a question meant to challenge my perceived double standards about Sansa, I have certainly not felt targeted by hate, though I also don't recall that happening.

That said, I am immensely amused by your view of me as someone who has the power and influence to "create an environment" where "many" fans of Sansa are somehow united in their fear of my, I can only assume, legions of loyal bloodhounds just twitching with eagerness to harrass others at my command.

I interact with maybe three people on this platform regularly, apart from reblogging cool posts that cross my dash. Where are these legions that dogpile people I disagree with? I would love to see them. I could ask them all to post cute baby sloth gifs to brighten my workday instead. I post into a void that I call The Internet and sometimes tumblr informs me I get little heart-shaped likes or amusingly tagged reblogs. I don't have the time to run a hate-based campaign against Sansa Infidels or some such, so all of you with different opinions can rest easy that while you post your truth, I'm trying to get my seven-year-old to accept the importance of brushing his teeth.

(I have been admonished, in the past, for what in retrospect amounts to vagueblogging about subjects that came up in other posts that I took as prompts for my own thought process. It wasn't intended maliciously, but I see how it was perceived that way. I apologized to the person - who approached me in private chat - and I have tried to make sure I no longer do that. Apart from that, my own impact on this fandom is pretty nebulous to me. You seem to see something very different from what I experience.)

[jaskierx]

Honestly, I really admire (and am thankful for) the way you manage and handle those back and forth with some Izzy stans, I don't think I have the mental strength to entertain them myself.

I wasn't part of the fandom after season 1 aired, I watched it without engaging much and then kind of waited for season 2 to come out, so I had no idea such a divide had happened between Izzy stans and the rest of the fandom (glad I was oblivious to it ngl). All I know is that I hated Izzy’s guts and wanted him to get his just desert.

So yeah, I wasn’t a fan and I struggled forgiving him when season 2 started because the show was trying so hard to make him sympathetic (which I honestly couldn’t give two shits about at first, I wanted revenge), plus you’re right, Izzy got way too much screen time (which gave Izzy stans ammunitions to say “SEE!! Main character!!!”), but I did end up warming up to him by the time he died. I can even say I genuinely liked him.

BUT the journey to that point was sooo conflicting because some Izzy stans were also doing the absolute most in the main tag, painting Izzy as this angel who never did anything wrong and was terrorized by the monster Ed, and I was like????? Did season 1 happen??? Did I dream the whole season??? Did I watch a version from an alternate universe??? I was BAFFLED. I don't know who is that Izzy they're talking about, but it's not the one on my screen, that's for sure.

Then, Izzy died and the hardcore stans lost their shit (you know what I'm talking about) and they have seriously soured me to Izzy again. I want to like the character we had on screen, and I want to like his redemption arc. He was a great antagonist even if I hated him, and we owed him so much for all the shit he pulled in season 1, but the OTT takes and behaviors from stans I’ve seen have made me give up on him, which sucks. Maybe I’ll feel better about him in a few months, but right now, I can’t stand him, and I’ve blocked his tag everywhere (ao3 included, because, truly, fuck fanon Izzy, fuck him).

Hope it’s not too draining for you though, just writing this felt like screaming into the void, so I can’t imagine dealing with this on the daily. Take care!

hi anon i'm so glad you sent this bc i felt very similarly about izzy in s2. i didn't find him sympathetic at all. i didn't give a single shit that he was suffering from ed being in his kraken era bc he's the entire reason ed ended up like that in the first place. izzy was reaping what he sowed. seeing ed feeling so miserable broke my fucking heart and i can't stand any bullshit takes about 'izzy was protecting the crew from ed's abuse' or 'edizzy invented love confirmed' or whatever other nonsense his stans chose to take away from episodes 1-3.

i truly do not see izzy as a victim. i truly do not see ed as an abuser. sometimes i will start reading a post in the ofmd tag that refers to an 'abuser' and a 'victim' and i get halfway through the post and realise that the op has a completely opposite view of who is who than i do.

and as s2 progressed i just felt worse and worse about it like he was getting so much screentime and popping up all over the place and he'd absorbed a load of traits (from other characters that i'd have rather seen more of) bc the writers had to speedrun making him semi-likeable. i still haven't done a proper rewatch since the finale aired and i'm pretty sure i'll feel different watching it knowing he dies in ep8, but when eps 6-7 dropped i fucking hated every scene he was in and felt like he ruined some otherwise really lovely ed/stede moments like their breakfast in bed. izzy being cheered on for wearing drag and singing - the exact acts that caused him to threaten ed - feels exactly like the very common queer experience of seeing the homophobic kid who bullied you for being queer getting loads of support when they come out themselves.

and the takes that were coming out of the canyon at this time were absolutely wild, especially in relation to ed. people absolutely baying for blood, wanting to see him suffer, wanting his relationship with stede to suffer, wanting him to have to crawl across broken glass to repair his relationship with the crew, all while treating izzy as a protagonist who never did anything wrong.

so ngl i was delighted when he died. but mostly i was relieved that it was going to be over. i walked out of my circus tent with my clown makeup on believing that the canyon would yell for a bit and then slowly quiet down as people who claimed they'd be leaving the fandom if izzy died made good on their promise and fucked off.

and if anything they've got louder and more unhinged and are out here reinventing tjlc and harassing the writers and churning out the most rancid racist posts and writing obituaries that caused multiple people on twt to mistakenly think Actual Human Person con o'neill had died.

and on one hand i'm kind of glad that more people know what they're like now but god i really do feel for any izzy fans who have had their enjoyment of him ruined by the canyon. i really do think it's not the character that's polarising, it's the fandom response, in that most people who come in liking izzy end up either aligning with the canyon or getting so fucking fed up of the canyon that they don't like him anymore. and both of those are a shame tbh because he is very well acted and well written, especially in s1, and i wish i could've enjoyed his scenes and felt the emotional payoff of his death

anyway. sorry for writing you 1 billion words. ily ❤️

[isahorcrux]

20 questions for fic writers

Thank you to @kay-elle-cee for tagging me !

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

10, which is wild because I think the last time I was asked this it was only 5.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

109,801 words

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Exclusively Harry Potter, I can't imagine writing for any other fandom at this point. Within HP, I'm pretty exclusively jily, though I have dabbled in hinny and even some scorose in my early fic writing days.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

some with arrows, some with traps london is lonely laundry day glad he's gone (this genuinely shocked me, but I do love this one so much) love it if we made it

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I usually try to respond to everyone commenting right when the fic or latest chapter drops and I'll keep it up for a couple of weeks, but I often forget to respond if they come in any later. If it's a particularly long comment I will usually respond though, just because I'm so in shock that someone took the time to write something that nice.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

hmmm....I mean probably champagne problems (though it's incomplete). This is also my most polarizing fic I think out of everything I've written. I do think i am no mother, i am no bride will eventually usurp the fic with the angstiest ending though. Or my hypothetical remus lupin halloween fic I'm thinking about for this year.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Ooohhh, I mean probably some with arrows, some with traps, right?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not really. I'd say the closest is people getting angry about how slowly I update certain fics. I'd also say a lot of people REALLY don't like Lily in champagne problems, which I sometimes take personally because I put a lot of myself in her lol.

9. Do you write smut. If so, what kind?

I am terrified to write smut. And I know I'll probably have to write it for something I have planned for a false start, not really sure how that's going to go.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I don't...but I do write the jily version of other pieces of media. Obviously SWA is much ado about nothing, and then I'm working on a Love, Rosie version of Jily for the Jilytober rom-com event right now.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have not, but this would be the highest form of flattery if someone ever asked to translate.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Never, but I'm definitely open to it!

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

I mean... it's jily, it's gotta be jily.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I mean probably champagne problems. I think the ending I intended works if it's a continuation with the rest of the folklorevermore songs I had planned, but it's quite ambitious and I've lost the steam for the other stories. I'd like to wrap up champagne problems as best I can, but I don't think it'll be the ending anyone wants to read.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue, 100%. There's a reason SWA is all texts. I also think my Sirius Black is quite good and also weirdly very consistent across all my fics no matter the world he's living in.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Finishing things...

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

If it was Italian or French I'd take a pass at it since I can speak both, but anything else I'd worry I was majorly mucking it up.

19. First Fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter (specifically scorose)

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

I mean, it's some with arrows, some with traps. It's probably my most favorite piece of anything I've ever written. It's also the first fic that wasn't a one shot that I finished. There's a reason I keep coming back to the world with a false start and with a big cake, happy birthday.

This was so fun!

Tagging @oyprongs @emeralddoeadeer @theesteemedladydebourgh @clare-with-no-i if you fancy and anyone else who'd like to give it ago !

[mellowthorn]

AO3 Tag Game

Thank you for the tag @tragediegh! I've only posted like two fics since I last filled this, so the answers probably won't have changed all that much. But I might as well do it anyway :^)

1. How many works do you have on ao3(or masterlist)? 6 (although one is partially fanart)

2. What’s your total ao3 word count? 100,837

3. What fandoms do you write for? Realm of the Elderlings

4. Top five fics by kudos? After the Sun Has Set, Someone Other Than Us, On This Silent Winter Eve, Ever Your Fool and Indulgence

5. Do you respond to comments? I try, because of how much I love them, though I've not done a good job at it this winter/spring. Idk why I've developed this weird mental block about them, but I'm trying my best to get over it

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Probably Someone Other Than Us?? With Ever Your Fool there's at least a chance that things might turn around after Bee is born, and the rest either lead to canon (which is a tragedy in itself) or have a happy ending.

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? On This Silent Winter Eve, which was my attempt at writing the fluffiest and sweetest fic that I am capable of.

8. Do you get hate on fics? Can't say I ever have gotten any.

9. Do you write smut? Occasionally.

10. Craziest crossover? I've never written crossover fanfic (if KH fanfic doesn't inherently count, but none of that's published anyway).

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? No

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Nah

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Nope

14. All time favorite ship? Fitzloved!

15. What’s a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Like half of my WIPs are like this haha. Especially when the outline gets out of hand and what was meant to be a oneshot ends up as a multichapter

16. What are your writing strengths? Hmm. Coming up with emotionally devastating scenarios and really wallowing in the characters' self-doubt and misery, for sure.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Descriptions, and any kind of figurative or poetic prose. Pretty much every single environmental description or a simile or a metaphor that I've ever written has cost me an immense amount of pain and tears.

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language? I guess it makes sense if that sort of thing also happens in the source material, but I personally wouldn't do it in any other case.

19. First fandom you wrote in? Uhhhh HP, sadly.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? After The Sun Has Set is my baby, but I am also particularly fond of The Cold Side of the Bed. I'd wanted to write something in a reverse chronological order for a while, and I think the tragic irony it gave to the latter parts worked well.

[kn-1013]

🥤 - for the ask meme?

this one is asking about fic recommendations, so sure i have a few. i've mostly been reading sally face fanfiction recently, as that's been the most recent fixation, but i'll try to include other fandoms, too.

(SF) misery fell by bluebottles is a great fic about sal and larry and travis becoming involved with each other after sal starts trying to help travis graduate. it follows canon quite a bit while obviously deviating for the sake of shipping, lol, but that makes this one feel pretty grounded in the source material.

(SF) bridges left to burn by 8ethespider8itch is a little more out there, where sal is in his 20s and moving to nockfell to start college, but oops, a good 80% of nockfellians are also monsters, including larry, travis and ash, the three of which are vampires. it's been a minute since i've picked this one up so i can't exactly remember the plot, but i remember really enjoying the concepts this one threw out, especially the collective trauma in how ash, larry, travis, (and others, iirc) became vampires, but i won't spoil that.

(SF) camp cornerstone by documentserver is the one i've been making my way through most recently, where sal and ash accidentally convince the rest of their friends to go to a church camp for the summer. even worse is the fact that the camp was being funded by the phelps ministry, so travis also has to be there against his will. i'm about halfway through and it's a really fun story so far. i can really appreciate the author being able to draw from their own life experiences as a lesbian to describe travis's inner turmoil with the fight between his faith and his homosexuality.

(DST) heart shaped box is a great fic exploring a ship i personally pioneered, which is wes/charlie. it's the only fic in the wes/charlie tag on ao3 that isn't mine, and i can appreciate that greatly. it's a fic that explores charlie's thoughts about wes back when she was still the grue, when maxwell was on the throne, and how she comes to the box he's kept in at nighttime. she talks to him, but even though he can never reply, she still hopes to free him herself one day. it's very sweet.

(MP100) reigen 1/2 by chubbyhornedequine is a fic i haven't checked up on in a while, i really need to, because the concept is frankly amazing. the idea is inspired by ranma 1/2, but instead of switching genders, reigen falls into a cursed pool and therefore whenever he's doused with water, he turns into a cat. it's just amazing, brilliant, please read it.

(MP100) area hysteria by c_c_cherry is a fic that i THOUGHT was finished somewhere around chapter 10, but apparently it's got a handful of chapters to go still. it's an amazing fic where reigen gets caught in the collapse of an old building for a couple of days, and then gets lost inside his own head. mob and dimple have to go in after his coma starts in order to save him. this fic does a great job at describing the reactions and behaviors of the other characters in the wake of reigen's disappearance, serizawa suddenly being in charge and not knowing what to do about it, mob having a meltdown, ritsu's terrified and realistic reactions to mob's freaking out, and much, much more. it's so good, i have to pick it up again and see what the new chapters have put out.

ok that's a bit of a long list but there you go. i haven't read any creepypasta fics recently so i can't recommend any of those, but if anyone has some fics to recommend me go straight ahead :)

[pyroreadscomics]

TAG 9 PEOPLE YOU WANT TO KNOW BETTER:

(I love doing theses things btw) I was tagged by @gothamstreetcat (thanks btw). Don't know what the etiquette is for when someone tags a side blog but, shrug, I'll keep this here. (BTW if you do want my main blog i'm @pyrocortex)

1. Favorite piece of clothing you own? If it still fit me it would be that steampunk-y vest with actual tails, however it's probably the black and red dress with the flower pattern (It's my goth phase and i get to decide when it ends, which is never)

2. Your comfort food?

Homemade baked goods. It doesn't specifically matter what, the comfort comes from the baking.

3. Favorite time of year?

Autumn is just generally aces but Halloween month is that extra good stuff.

4. Favorite song?

Depending on mood: Achilles Come Down by Gang of Youths, Adrianne by Orion Experience, Burning for You by Blue Oyster Cult, or Misanthropic Druken Loser by Days N Daze

5. Do you collect something?

Currently Nothing (except prephaps comics about Catwoman and D&D minis). previously? Stamps, coins, pretty rocks, MTG and Pokemon trading cards, legos, stuffed animals almost all when i was really young and didn't understand how "collecting" worked (like, secondary markets were a mystery to me, i just came across neat things and hoarded them like a dragon)

6. Favorite drink?

Hot Chocolate. Because the winter is cold, chocolate is tasty, and alcoholism seems like zero fun.

7. Favorite Fanfiction (if you are comfortable to share)

Sure, why not. Though given some of the fanfics that have most stuck with me are for fandoms tied to media properties i don't feel like giving even the most minor attention, or just fandoms i'm not willing to admit being a part of. That said Current favourite is: Red Robin Hood by Candlebreak (Batman) Which is not done, but damn if it not well written (and well constructed, and with thematic death). Plot tl;dr, Under the Hood AU where Jason kidnaps Tim after their fight in the tower and the entire bat family mobilizes to try to get him back. It's kinda really fucking dark in places (arguably no one in this story is in a mentally healthy place even before Tim got kidnapped) but... damn it's good. Also some previous favs which i'm willing to admit possibly do not hold up it's been a while since i've read these: Better Angels of Our Nature by bzarcher (Widowtracily, Overwatch), which one hand, Blizzard sucks as a company and by all reports overwatch currently sucks as a game, on the other hand... cute lesbian polycule working through trauma together (I'd say it doesn't quite hold up through the ending, but it's still solid). and legit, the first fanfic I think I ever read (which I found on Deviantart): Jane and Amelia 1: A Cry for Help (along with the rest of that series) by Firefall Bangenthump. Which is a crossover between's Disney's Tarzan and Treasure Planet, that ships Captain Amelia and Jane Porter together... And while it's been, probably more than half of a decade since i've read these, I do remember it being pretty good (and also it kinda just logged itself in my brain and hasn't left since). I have no explanation, or justification, save for the fact i was barely a teenager. On reflection it's probably weird that i can't think of any truly stand out fanfics for what I'd consider my biggest media obessions, (Cybersix, Discworld, the Vorkosigan saga, Catwoman). but also I will admit to not having done a through search (plus it's like, With discworld the vorkosigan saga and catwoman there's a mountain of official content, and full read throughs of any of those could take weeks (but more likely months or maybe even a full year) and with Cybersix it's just, old and obscure and last received new content a decade before ao3 launched). All that said i'd be down for any recommendations forged Catwoman centric fics. TAGGING: @biracialdamianwayne @harlequintears @pleasestophoney and@the-caped-crusader and anyone else who wants to do this.

[businesstiramisu]

Yes please, I'd like to see the charts (re: shounen fanfic shipping gender dynamics)

Hahah yes a fellow charts nerd! And so politely asked too <3

(re: this post)

Some explanation: these are the category tags denoting what types of relationships appear in a work (more info here). I’ve highlighted the most popular category for each fandom for ease of reading. Authors can select multiple such tags or none, so the percentages won't add up to 100%. I am looking specifically at Archive of Our Own (henceforth AO3), which has distinct trends and biases from other anime fandom spaces (even other fanfiction spaces). I tried to double check for typos but between my own errors and AO3 database weirdness, take these numbers with a grain of salt. Also, I chose fandoms that I knew to be popular and/or that I personally know pretty well, but I can't be sure that they are representative of shounen anime fandoms as a whole.

Also disclaimer: I'm not endorsing or even sharing personal opinions on any of the specific ships mentioned in this post, just observing their existence and popularity on AO3. Please don't start shipping discourse on my post!

More charts and more thoughts below the cut--

Now, the original thesis was that shounen genre constraints give much more emotional weight to relationships between male characters (especially young male characters) so that's what the fandom focuses on interpreting romantically. Quite a common take around here, and indeed the numbers bear it out. There is some complication on shipping the young characters vs. their mentors which is hidden by the chart -- for example I was surprised that the Mob Psycho 100 tag is majority M/M, because that series felt very non-romantic to me (okay that is a personal opinion). However, a lot fic ships Reigen, not Mob and age mates (still plenty of romance written about the boys, but if you filter out Reigen/* tags then what's left is plurality Gen rather than M/M). I was also surprised that Naruto isn't quite majority M/M, given what I've seen of that fandom, but I don't know it well enough to have any theories.

The big outlier (of the ones I initially thought to check) is Fullmetal Alchemist, especially mangahood. I think this is because despite being a very popular shounen adventure, FMA doesn’t follow the formula in the original post -- Ed & Al (though fanfic & really the original story itself focus more on Ed) aren't trying to become The Best At Alchemy, they already are the best, and because of that, they spend way more time around adults than kids their age. (Maybe I shouldn't have been so surprised that the most popular gay ship in this fandom is Ed/Roy.) They do have a few friends their age – Winry, Ling, and Mei all feature in the top ten ships on AO3. However, by far the most popular ship is Riza/Roy – perhaps because the story focuses more on the adults? That's probably true compared to BNHA and Haikyuu, and maybe Jujutsu Kaisen, but I'm not convinced on the others. (For the record, MP100 and Haikyuu are the other two on here where the most popular ship isn’t doesn’t include the protagonist, but the difference between the number of fics featuring their top ship and the top main character ship isn’t as big.) Maybe Royai are just that much more interesting? Or maybe I’m reading too much into small amounts of cherry picked data :P

Another more tentative hypothesis, but also I think fan writers respond to developed relationships more than well-written(/fan-favorite) female characters. I checked Jujutsu Kaisen because that story gets a lot of praise for its female characters, but this isn’t reflected in it’s AO3 stats at all. From watching the anime, I thought the female characters (at least the students) got roughly the same amount of screen time and development as their male counterparts, but clearly the AO3 portion of the fandom focuses their shipping energies on the latter (and Gojo). JJK is much shorter than the rest of these (so far) and hasn't had as much time develop relationships between it's main cast, so I wonder (if it chooses to add any romance) whether this will be reflected in the AO3 fandom going forward. This isn't a request for manga spoilers (and the manga tag on ao3 is equally gay) but if you've got a manga-based theories or tidbits to share I don't mind hearing them!

(Also I'd argue that the "better written canon relationships" explains the difference distributions in the FMAB and FMA 2003 tags, but that's definitely getting into subjective opinions and probably no one reading this blog cares that much.)

Speaking of JJK, I called that fandom “very horny” in my earlier tags, and here’s what I meant:

(I’m repurposing this one from an older discussion, so the numbers are a bit out of date. Also the way Jujutsu Kaisen is split into manga and anime with no combined tag was an extra complication but I think I combined them properly, and the following discussion is still focused on the anime tag.)

So, a full quarter of the works in the Jujutsu Kaisen (anime) tag are marked explicit. That’s higher than any of the fandoms I checked last year when I was investigating whether AO3 is mostly porn, including Bandom (that is, musician-focused RPF). My sister pointed out that Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure has almost as high %explicit (though it has slightly more gen & teen rated fics), but honestly that one doesn't surprise me. JJK however seemed more sedate when I watched it. (But also not, like, unusually chaste – I’d say typical shounen levels of horniness, which is why the fandom confuses me.) I don’t have any good theories here tbh – if you guys have theories to share I’d be curious, but keep it respectful, I’m not here to bash ANY fic writers.

Finally, I want to be clear that FMA isn't unique, but it might be unusual:

Here's the dozen-ish "Top Anime" (a measure that combines raw popularity and high ratings) from MyAnimeList.com, excluding a few with less than a hundred works on AO3. Some of them skew even more F/M than FMA! However, these ones don’t follow the shounen formula (well maybe Steins;Gate, I’m much less familiar with that one) and are much less popular on AO3 than FMA. The ones that are as popular or more (Attack on Titan, Hunter x Hunter, arguably Gintama) do follow the typical shounen formula, with the expected AO3 stats. I didn’t make a chart (yet), but shoujo (Fruits Basket, Sailor Moon), or adventure shounen with female protagonists (Soul Eater, Promised Neverland) can also get a lot of F/M fics. Some of these are also pretty popular, but none (that I’ve found) are quite as big as FMA. People have also been suggesting adventure/sports shounen well-written F-M or F-F relationships in the notes to the OP (*waves at Gale*) but they all have nonexistent to tiny fandoms on AO3.

Basically, I think FMA is at something like a Pareto Maximum of “makes people care about canon het relationships” and “makes people want to post fic about it on AO3”. It might not be the only one, but it is somewhat unusual, and also my favorite, so it’s the one I wanted to talk about :P

tl;dr -- Minerva is right (not that anyone doubted that I think!), FMA fandom is unusual, JJK fandom is horny.

This post took a while to write because I kept thinking of more fandoms to check and more questions to investigate, so I might make more charts and more posts. Let me know what you think, what I oversimplified, and if you have any suggestions for further investigation!

[anxietysroomsupport]

Hypermobile anon here. First, thank you so much. It's just nice to know there's someone here for me. And to give a little more info, I have a serious problem where if I'm not currently in pain. I don't remember how bad it was. I know everybody does this, but my brain literally checked out as I was going to bed recently and I fell on the floor. I nearly forgot to tell my physical therapist.about it because it didn't really hurt. So, I can't do the pain scale very well, and I never remember (1/2)

(2/2) It just makes it sort of hard for pain relief when I don't know I'm going to need it and don't have the energy when I do. Also, on the vitamin subject, I know that I've had vitamin d issues before (bad heat exhaustion and allergy scares = going outside less), bad enough that I was close to being diagnosed with hypothyroidism. I'm not sure about the others, but I do know I'm not amazing healthy, so? I take calcium pills for the vitamin d, though. Again, thank you guys for all your help.

.

We just got a bill from my PT place that says we owe money that we can't pay. They told us up front how much it would be with our insurance, and my mom's been paying each time, but it says we owe 177 dollars. Sure, it's not a lot, but we're not rich and trying to send a sibling to college. If we can't get this sorted out. I can't just not go. 10 exercises I can do at home and 5 appointments is not enough to help a chronic disorder. I cant focus and I have practice in 30 mins. -Hypermobility anon

Same day but later when I'm feeling a little better (my director was very supportive though so that's nice), I'd seen the letter and heard my parents talking a bit, but my mom told be as we got to school for rehearsal about PT. I got upset, and I felt bad because I could tell she felt bad because she didn't expect me to be upset, and in the heat of the moment I said "chronic illness" in front of my mom for the first time. She loudly (not quite yelling) (1/?) - Hypermobility anon

said to me "That is the most self-pitying thing I've ever heard. Chronic illnesses are like cancer". Sure, I probably should've said disorder and not illness, but I'm scientifically right. Then I said "It is, it's chronic pain, I am always in pain" and she said "Well then clearly PT isn't helping anyway" - I??? When I went in after 15 minutes after another girl, since we were both there for an hour and a half, I decided to stop trying too much to hide my crying (useful masks) (2/?) -HSD anon

since the other girl was in the hall to eat, and when I managed to explain to the director, she was understanding and nice, and when I said chronic, she said that I should never have to live with that, especially at my age. And when I mentioned not being able to sing at that moment from my crying, she pointed out how I was singing an empowering song that was about standing against the bad stuff in life, and I was perfect for it. I know my mom was just mad, but it just drained me.

Sorry I keep sending asks so often, I just feel like telling someone this. I decided to put 'zebra' in my bio. It's a thing that people with EDS and HSD sometimes like to call themselves. I like it, so even though I just have my name and pronouns, plus a random joke, in my bio, I added it. It just feels like a step in the right direction to remembering that I don't need google to tell me I'm dealing with this every 5 minutes. Accepting it, I guess. :) -HSD anon

.

My sleep schedule just keeps getting worse and I think it's my ADHD combined busy days and pain but I just never want to sleep anymore. I can't, I don't want to, and it hurts physically and mentally to just lie there and see if I can fall asleep. 80% sure my circadian rhythm changed to sleep at about 2 am but I get up at 7 and have a chronic disorder that's getting worse because of this I *need sleep*. And I'm so scared I'll mess up, want to make a side blog for it but want to make one (1/2)

for something happy first because I always figured that if I had side blogs they would be ask blogs or for fandoms or whatever. But I got a little better at not caring what other people think, so I haven't really needed one for fandom. But I looked through the tag and felt so comforted by some of the stuff that I just think it would help me. Maybe I'm just extra bad tonight because I went outside but also talked about it a fair amount with a friend I hadn't seen recently who didn't know. -HSD

.

I wanna talk to my physical therapist about hip braces because I tried a knee one we have and it honestly helps, but my hips are worst so I wanna see if it would help, but they're pretty expensive. It's hard to find dual hip braces, from what I've seen in my research, and even though one more than the other, both cause me issues. Idk, I'm conflicted, because it could help but is it worth all the effort? Also, even if it's under clothing it's still physical evidence (1/2) -HSD anon

(2/2) of my "invisible" disorder. Also, stopping exercises for a few days because of not feeling well from my covid shot reminded me of just how much time I spend on them, so it's another thing to deal with this. . . Idk, sometimes I just wonder if it would be better to just deal with it. I still have pain anyway, though it might be a little better. Less often, maybe? I don't really remember. It's not stressing at the front of my mind all the time, but the back of it. I'm just conflicted. -HSD

.

HSD anon here, idk if I mentioned it in an ask already, but recently I had a small breakdown because I was watching something where a character was in a car accident, as was trying to push through having trouble walking even with a hip brace. After a minute, I registered it and just thought "That could be my future". My joints had already been acting up and then they got worse, so I don't know if it was cause and effect? But I don't exactly know what to call it other than a trigger. (1/2)

Physical and emotional effect, at least I'm assuming on physical because I've had a bad reaction to something similar before, but like, I don't have trauma, I think it's more fear of the future. And I don't want to use trigger incorrectly, it's insensitive to those who actually have triggers. I'm just so confused.

Forgot to sign the last ask with 2/2 and HSD, whoops.

.

Hfnsiwk I'm not ready to walk into PT tomorrow and say that I don't think months of PT have been helping but I have no way to be completely sure because for all I know it's the weather since this is the first year I've known/it's been noticeable. Maybe it's just change, I don't know, but it just feels like such a waste of time if it really didn't help. Plus, I'd stop, and while that'd be great, I do enjoy being stronger, even if it didn't help pain. I have 12 hours and a bad pain day idek. -HSD

.

Hi Hypermobility Anon,

I think I found all your asks and got them in the correct order.  And found your last ask!

I’m so glad you kept writing in.  I think you should go ahead and make your side blog - you definitely have enough material for it.  Wanting to make a happy side blog also is a great goal to have, but if you don’t know what it will be yet, don’t let that prevent you from doing something you know you want to do and that will probably help you.  

You are dealing with So. Much.  Your mom especially sounds like she just is not ready to accept the situation.  It’s not self-pity to state your actual conditions.  It’s just reality.  

Forgetting about pain is normal, and really all you can do is try to write it down or make some kind of note about it in the moment or immediately after, so you can refer to it later.  Maybe you can track your pain events in your phone notes.

I think your idea to add “zebra” to your bio is a good one, this is part of your life and just something you have to deal with.  It sounds like you’re finding a community for this.  

Sleep schedules are tricky, and feeling like you desperately need to sleep can make it so stressful that it starts a vicious little cycle.  Some strategies to get around this are First, remember that just resting is okay and helpful too, even if you don’t fall asleep.  Letting your body lay there to rest is good for you.  

Second, if you’ve spent several minutes laying down without falling asleep, its okay to get up and walk around, or any small light exercise that’s comfortable for you.  The goal with this one is to get out of the bed for a bit.  It will help your brain to re-learn that the bed is for sleeping only, not for laying awake.  That association can help signal to your brain to start its sleep-process when you get into bed at night.

Third, it’s really common to have a changing circadian rhythm during your teens and twenties.  That’s just a thing that happens and you can’t do much about it, so just try not to worry too much.  Sleep when it feels right and when you can, instead of trying to force yourself to sleep when you’re “supposed” to.  

If hip braces would help you, you should definitely at least mention it to your physical therapist.  You might research online for any used ones as well.  A physical sign that you have pain can have good and bad consequences, but I think the good consequence of being in less pain far outweighs any others.

The triggering event you described is not so much a trigger as it is just a genuinely really upsetting situation.  You related really strongly to the character you were watching, because they’re dealing with similar problems to you, and to problems you could have in the future.  It’s a lot to process.  But while you could potentially be in a car accident, remember that television is made to dramatize events and probably made it seem a lot more difficult and scary than it really would be.   

Since we know you sometimes forget your pain, it’s safe to say that the exercises are helping you manage it, and you say that they’ve made you stronger in general.  Those are good things, and I would recommend you continue the exercises you can do on your own even if you end of ending  your physical therapy sessions.  We don’t know yet if your pain might have gotten even worse without therapy.  You’ll have to find that out on your own if you stop exercising, and then decide whether it’s more worth it to you to continue exercising or to live with the pain.  Whichever you choose, it’s Your choice, Your body.  Take care of yourself. <3

-bun

[masc-reader-insertss]

Totally not gay- Xavier Plympton

Gif credit; Violadvs (I won’t tag them on here because this is a smut and I do t want to make anyone uncomfortable)

So, I flaked on my no nsfw rule, ahs is the only fandom I will write nsfw for right now (apart from two spn ones I got coming up) but god I just saw Xavier and I was like,, I have to make this. I can't decide if I wanna fuck him or I want him to fuck me I just,, watch my cry when he inevitably gets killed off.

Description; Xavier totally isn't gay, so what, he'd had to pretend for the camera, that didn't mean he actually like guys, right? That's what he tells himself at least, until he and Y/N are left alone in the showers.

Smut; shower blowjobs/hand jobs, denial, making out

—

Just to be clear, Xavier wasn't gay, like, not even a little bit. Those 'acting' gigs had been nothing more than that, he was only pretending to be into that, at least, that's what he'd tried to tell himself. Really he had no idea how he had ended up in this situation, but he wasn't complaining, far from it actually. But this didn't mean anything, right? This was just like all those other times he'd acted for the camera, except this time there was no camera, and he was really enjoying this.

It had all started once they had sent the kids to bed. All the rest of the guy counsellors had hit the showers like any ordinary night, except this time it felt different. Y/N had always been cocky, he couldn't help it, so when he'd turned around to see his fellow totally not gay counsellor Xavier staring at him while he showered he couldn't keep himself from saying, "take a picture, lasts longer. Better wank material too", a large grin on his face.

The whole room erupted in laughter, and Xavier scoffed, his cheeks a dark red as he looked away from Y/N. "I wasn't staring at you, I'm not gay. I like chicks" he muttered, huffing for a moment before Y/N leant over to speak to him again. "Me too, but that's never stopped me" and of course he was blushing again, nearly choking on his own spit. "Thats still gay, and I told you, I'm /not/ gay" Xavier rolled his eyes and turned his back to Y/N, and it was then he realised that while he was busy denying that he had any interest in guys all the other counsellors had gone, leaving only him and Y/N.

"Great.." he muttered, rinsing the last of the shampoo from his hair before he reached for the shower handle, nearly jumping out of his skin when Y/N grabbed his wrist. "Dude, what the fuck?!" He hissed, trying to tug back his wrist, but to no avail. Y/N only smirked, looking up at the other counsellor. "So you're telling me, you wouldn't get turned on if I did.. this?" He asked before taking a step forward, reaching up to cup Xavier's jaw with his free hand before he leant in, pressing his lips against his collarbone. Quickly, he trailed his lips up, leaving soft bites and kissed along the way. "You wouldn't even get a little hard, if I started to do that..?" He continued, pulling back to look up at Xavier.

Y/N knew he was good, but he didn't think he was good enough to have someone as worked up as Xavier was so quickly. "Look, just because that was kind of hot and I am sort of hard, doesn't mean that I'm in to guys.." he breathed, letting his eyes close for a moment, which turned out to be a big mistake because as soon as he did Y/N took that opportunity and got on his knees in front of Xavier, releasing his grip on his wrist to wrap his hands around his dick, because holy shit it was big enough for Y/N to be able to wrap both of his hands around and still have just enough to wrap his lips around, which is exactly what he did.

And that was what had led up to this moment right here, with Xavier letting out an embarrassingly loud moan and opening his eyes to look down at Y/N. Okay, so maybe he did like guys, just a little bit, but he wasn't gay, and he made sure Y/N knew that. "Just because- shit, just because I'm into this, doesn't mean I'm- doesn't mean, fuck.." well, he tried to tell him, at least, but when Y/N's lips wrapped around the head of his dick so perfectly it was hard to focus, and doing anything more than breathing became impossible when his tongue ran over his slit.

"You were saying..?" Y/N pulled back for a moment to look up at Xavier, revelling in the sight of his flushed cheeks and wide eyes. He was really a sight to behold when he was this turned on. His break didn't last long, and Y/N soon moved back to his task of proving to Xavier that he was in fact partly gay weather he liked it or not, one of his hands moving to hold at his hip so he had more space to work with. Y/N had done this countless times before, he knew just how to drive a guy crazy, and that's exactly what he did, because when he ran his tongue along the vein on the under side of his cock Xavier was sure he'd died and gone to heaven, because fuck, no one had ever made him feel like that before. The worry that someone might walk in on them did flash through his mind for a second, but that thought, along with every single other completely disappeared from his brain as Y/N hollowed out his cheeks and began to bob his head, and fuck, maybe he was just a little bit gay because this had to be the best blow job he'd ever gotten.

Y/N knew what he was doing and it was obvious. He knew the affect he was having on Xavier, and he loved it. When he pulled his other hand away and looked up to meet eyes with Xavier he was surprised the other hadn't blown his load right then and there with the look that flashed across his face as he hit the back of his throat, Y/N didn't think he'd ever seen someone that desperate. The sight was enough to make him reach a hand down to his own cock, bucking into his fists a few times to give just some relief as he continued to go to town on his friends cock. Xavier was close, he could feel it in the way he reached down to grab his hair, and when Y/N swallowed around him he finally lost it, arching his head back and shoving his hips forward, he'd never heard anything hotter than the sound of Y/N choking on his dick as he held him there and came down his throat.

All too soon the wet heat around him disappeared, and Xavier closed his eyes for a moment to catch his breath, though his eyes quickly snapped open again when he heard Y/N's moans, looking over at the other, and if he hadn't just came he totally would have gotten hard at the sight. Y/N leant against the wall, his Y/H/C fringe hanging in his face as he fucked into his fist, and yeah he was definitely a little gay. Quickly he moved forward, shoving his lips against Y/N's and letting out a moan when he could taste himself on the others lips. "Thought you weren't gay? Kissing a guy is pretty gay.." Y/N teased, choking on a moan when his hand was shoved away and replaced with a bigger, softer one. "You literally just had my dick in your mouth, that's way more gay.." Xavier pressed their lips together again before Y/N could say anything else, swallowing down his moans as he jacked him off. The kiss was messy, teeth clashed and tongues prodded, but it was better than any other kiss either of them had experienced.

Xavier's attack on his lips soon moved to his neck, and Y/N soon found himself tangling a hand in the others hair, moaning out and tugging at the bleached strands to try and cope with the building pleasure. He was close, it wouldn't take much more for him to tip over the edge, and that small nudge came in the form of Xavier reaching a hand back to squeeze his ass for a moment as he bit down on the one spot on his neck that made his knees weak. Y/N came with a shout, blowing his load all over Xavier's toned stomach, some of it even landing on himself. Thank god they were in the shower, or this would be one hell of a mess to clean up.

"So, still think you're not gay, even a little bit?" Y/N teased as they both washed themselves off, arms wrapped around Xavier's neck. "Okay, maybe just a little bit" Xavier grinned back, pressing a quick kiss to Y/N's lips before reaching to turn off the shower again. They'd both been so busy making out for the next five minuets that neither of them had heard the unmistakable sound of keys jingling in the distance, soon pulling away to get dressed again.

"So.. all I have to do to get you off is squeeze your ass, huh?" Xavier teased as they walked back the cabin, Y/N rolling his eyes and throwing his wet towel at him. "Shut up.. it was hot" he shrugged, taking Xavier's hand in his own. Maybe this summer wasn't going to be so boring after all. When they'd finally made it back to their cabin, each of them climbed into their top bunks, turning to face each other. Both boys were so high on their post orgasm bliss, they had absolutely no idea what was in store for them that night.

[tomishaped]

Rating:

Explicit

Archive Warnings:

Graphic Depictions Of Violence • Major Character Death

Category:

M/M

Fandom:

Supernatural

Relationship:

Dean Winchester!Izzy Hlton

Characters:

Dean Winchester • Izzy Hilton • Sam Winchester • Asmodeus • Dagon • Demons • Hellhound • Ellen Harvelle • Jo Harvelle • Hunters • Crowley • Charlie Bradbury • Bobby Singer • Ruby • Death • Pestilence • Famine • War • Castiel • Angels • Cain

Additional Tags:

Demon Dean Winchester • Demon Sex • Kidnapping • Gay Sex • Blood • Blood Kink • Hate Sex • Love/Hate • Major Character Injury • Major Original Character(s) • Character Death • Past Child Abuse • Past Rape/Non-con • Past Sexual Abuse • Past Torture • Past Violence • Canon-Typical Violence • Violence • Protective Dean Winchester • Bisexual Dean Winchester • Top Dean Winchester • Dean Winchester is Bad at Feelings • Izzy is too • Emotional Hurt/Comfort • Emotional/Psychological Abuse

Summary: After being pulled out of hell Dean realizes quickly that the four months he had been gone made way for a lot of changes in the lives of everyone he knows, including the life he had known for himself before he died. Nobody was treating him the same, and there was seriously something going on with his brother that he could not figure out. He was spending most of his time alone nowadays, not really hunting anymore since Bobby and Sam were against it for him, and spending most of his time drinking instead to try and forget. He was angry, pretty much all the time. That anger really worked in his favour though when walking back to the impala he came across a freaking hoard of demons getting ready to attack some blond chick. He didn't know who she was or what the hell all the demons wanted with her, but there was no way he could just walk away. Maybe if he had any idea what trying to save this person was going to lead too he would have just walked away, maybe if he had actually given any thought to the situation before him he wouldn't have put himself in the middle of it, but even before hell he made impulsive and rash decisions... so maybe not.

Previous Chapters

• Chapter One •

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter Two: Welcome to the Batcave

Part One

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When they had reached the car Dean made quick work of the door locks and got them both inside before he punched it, only leaving squealing tires and smoke behind them as they took off. Dean didn’t start to relax till they were a mile or so away from the group of demons, still keeping an eye on the mirrors though just in case. “You really pissed someone off," he said with a grin as he glanced over at the other while he drove.

Izzy did manage to force himself to relax once they were in the car, though Dean still happened to look tense with the way he was looking out his mirrors for someone. Honestly, it probably helped the demon to relax with the fact that Izrael couldn't feel Dagon as close anymore. She was either losing interest or losing track of them for now, either way that worked for him. "Huh?" He was honestly confused at first when Dean said that, "Why would you think I pissed some- oh! Because of all that? Right. Yeah. They don't seem to fond of me, do they? I should probably stop crashing into their parties like that." 

Izrael shifted in the seat a little and rolled his eyes when he saw the man look out his mirrors again, "You can stop doing that now. We're fine, mommy lost us," he said with a shrug, leaning back in the seat again, trying to get comfortable. He was ready to get out of the Winchesters car now, and he would really like to do it without having to kill the hunter next to him in order to keep him from following or trying to track him. Even if he didn't have an issue with killing humans, he didn't know which way Dean's soul would go now and having it back in the pit after he killed him could possibly become… problematic. "So uh, yeah, you can just drop me off whenever now and can go get back too… whatever the hell you were doing before joining me at that lovely party tonight. I'm actually supposed to be at a different party right now anyways, so anywhere is good."

Dean snickered when the other said that they had crashed a few parties, it made sense. He did raise an eyebrow when he was told that the horde had backed off of them. Granted he hadn’t noticed any one but still, he never trusted demons to give up. “To be honest, I was out looking for a good time… guess I found it,” he said with a wicked grin, still feeling a bit of an adrenaline high from the fight and sprint to the car. “Rest of my evening is open if you want some back up,” he offered the blond. “Not saying you can’t handle yourself, I saw your moves back there but… twenty to one is a bit much,”  he said while giving him a bit of a doubtful side look. 

This is what Dean thought of as a good time? The human was either suicidal or crazy. Sure, Izzy did have fun doing shit like this too, but he was a demon- he was fucking crazy. "Mmm, yeah… it was a bit much till you showed up. Definitely would have ended up losing this jacket," Izrael laughed a little at Dean and shook his head, "See, I haven't gone and learned my lesson yet it seems since I'm definitely gonna be crashing one of their parties again. Gotta find it first though, and I can't do that in a strangers car."

Dean raised an eyebrow when the blond mentioned that they weren’t done yet and was looking to start a similar party to where he just found them. Ok sure he had been doing stupid stuff since he got back but he had an excuse. He was trying to repress what felt like forty years of Hell - literal Hell. So what was this kid's excuse? She might be crazy, but her crazy was also kinda hot and hunters like this don’t tend to stick in one place long because of the next big hunt. Besides, too often if they stayed in one place for long then all the enemies they made along the way had a tendency to catch up to them. “I can drop you off wherever your next party is so you don’t get jumped on the way again…” Dean trailed off a little as he drove, “could at least tell me your name before you get yourself killed.”

Izrael smiled at the hunter. "Why would I give someone I've never met in this life my name? Doesn't sound too smart. Besides, I don't see you passing over that information either."

Dean grinned. “Sorry, thought you picked it up before things got hairy. Names Dean, Dean Winchester," he said as he held a hand out to shake as he drove, glancing at the blond but mostly keeping his eyes on the road. “You know demons can’t keep their big mouths shut, if your next party is anything like that one, they’re going to be ready for you and you’re going to lose more than your jacket, sweetheart," he said in a matter of fact tone. “Might be a better idea to show up with back up and armed to the teeth,” he offered with a mischievous grin. “Lucky for you I know the perfect place.”

His excuse? His absolute only memories were of hell. Turning into a demon the way he had had wiped out all his human memories and the little demon only knew the last sixty years he had spent in hell training to do just this. He wasn't trying to repress hell, why repress when it was all he knew? He was just doing what Asmodues sent him off to do, and with the youngest prince of hell being the closest person to the blond and having nothing else to really do… he listened. He enjoyed killing other demons, it was a task he found fun. But when your job is to kill any demon that stands against the man you're working for, you don't exactly make any friends. And being alone only gave him more time to hunt down Asmodues's enemies. It was a vicious never ending cycle that wasn't going to change anytime soon as far as Izrael could tell. Hell either hated him, feared him, or admired him from afar - very afar. No one was brave enough to chance getting on Izzy's bad side. And those that were like the hoard tonight that actually tried to kill him were just too stupid to stay away and deserved to die anyways as far as he was concerned. 

Of course he knew who Dean was once he heard his name. But the hunter didn't need to know that Izrael had heard of him. He eyed the other’s hand for a moment before he sighed and half gave in to the man, though didn't reach his own hand out, "Izzy Hilton," he said, using the name that Asmodues had given him for when he had to pretend to be human. Though he had no idea that it actually was his name. That Asmodues called him Izrael to see if any of the once nineteen year old’s memories would spark with little clues like that. It never did. "They're always on the lookout for me… wouldn't be anything new…" he said with a little shrug, getting the gut feeling that this hunter was not about to let him go off on his own anytime soon. The last thing the little demon needed was to do spend time with a fucking Wincester, especially the one that spent all that time in hell. "No offense, but I don't really work with others. Thanks for the help back there and everything, but you're Dean Winchester… so you and I working together is a bad idea. Trust me."

With both hands back on the wheel, Dean snorted when Izzy said that demons watching out was nothing new. He understood that, that's what made the Bunker so beautiful. It was the definition of a safe house for spooky shit and basically everything else. He sucked some air between his teeth when it seemed the other knew who he was by name, having heard some of the stuff hunters thought of him while he was putting in time at the Roadhouse. “Fair, I mean we did just meet and I also just saved your ass from a fucking gaggle of demons, but okay,” he said, half joking. “We don’t know each other, and inviting you to my secret Men of Letters bunker can seem a little Silence of the Lambs but I promise, imma damn puppy dog compared to your normal party guests,” he said,.  Ane yes, he did just name drop the Men of Letters to see if that helped his case. Dean wasn’t a creep and if Izzy wanted out he’d drop them off wherever they wanted but all horn-dog habits aside, he wouldn’t rest well if he did. He’d probably end up asking around and looking into this pretty Izzy Hilton to see what her story was about. “Again, I know bunker can be off putting, but this place is huge, over twenty bedrooms to pick from. It’s armed to the teeth so nothing is getting in. I have one of the few keys to get in but you can get out whenever you like,” he added, trying to seem a little less kidnappy and rapey. “That and there's a hundred year old whiskey collection.”

Izzy had absolutely zero ideas of what other hunters thought of the man he was currently sitting next too. Up until now, he had done a really good job at avoiding them in his travels and work. Sure, to be on the safe side he did do some research on hunters who seemed to be the biggest threats but until now he hadn't actually met any of them. So, right now he couldn't figure out if it was just bad fucking luck that Dean Winchester happened to walk in on his ambush, or some weird good luck to get him out of it unharmed. Even after over fifty years as a demon, almost sixty now maybe? He honestly had never actually hurt a human. So did he deserve this kind of bad luck? On the other hand though, can demons actually have good luck? It was really confusing. 

Fact was, Izzy only knew of Dean Winchester from the mouths of other demons. His research on hunters in general was by word of mouth in hell. It wasn't like there were any books he could read on them. So he knew the man was obviously a good hunter, and not just when it came to demons. He knew the idiot sold his soul to save that dumbass brother of his that was hanging around one of the main demons on his own hit list. It was just really hard to get to the bitch when she was being protected by the hunter drinking demon blood. He only knew that from actually running across her once, he could fucking smell the demon blood radiating from the human she was with and it didn't take long to figure out who that human was and what fucking Ruby was doing with him. Little Sammy Winchester. Lovely. He also knew the man next to him spent what was like forty years in hell, being tortured for most of them by fucking Alastair. It had come as a surprise when he heard that there was some sort of angel watching out for him. Well, the angel part wasn't really known when he figured it out. It was just known that the man was pulled out of hell and Izrael knew that an Angel was the only way the man could have escaped hell and returned to his body the way he had. And really, he would prefer to avoid angels. Most demons weren't really that much of a threat to him. They could likely hurt him but Izzy was not easy to actually kill. Not that they had quite figured that out yet. But he had no idea what an angel might be able to do to him. 

Izrael couldn't remember his own torture. He actually had no idea it even happened. Ever since the day Asmodues found his newly turned demon in that cage he kept his pet in, the youngest prince acted as though that was the first day of Izzy's life. He didn't even know that he was in that cage because of that man in the first place. "I'm not afraid of you, Dean, even though I'm pretty damn sure you're no puppy dog," Izzy told him with a little roll of his eyes, the man who had spent his last few years in hell torturing other souls was far from a puppy. But he had caught Izzy's attention mentioning the Men of Letters. He vaguely remembered Asmodues mentioning them decades ago. Something about them being all dead now… about them holding knowledge no one else had. Going to this bunker… could prove useful if the knowledge thing was true.

Izzy finally looked over at Dean again, tucking hair behind his ears, "Well whiskey is always a very good and tempting offer," he said, chewing on his lip a little as he thought it over. "If you're all armed like you say you are… Do you also have books and shit? Like, books on demons and shit." Izzy knew he had been turned differently than almost every other demon that existed, he had to have been to have his own body and no ability whatsoever to jump from one meatsuit to the next, but he had no idea what happened to make him this way. And no book he had found since being set loose on the world had been able to give him the answer he was looking for. If this bunker had hidden knowledge it might be his best bet to find out how he turned, because Asmodues wasn't telling him anytime soon. "And I really wouldn't have to just stay if I don't want to. I can just walk out? Seriously?"

Dean just grinned when the other said he was pretty sure he wasn’t a puppy, calling him out like that. And he believed them when they said that they weren’t scared of him, he did find her in the middle of a demon infested alleyway in the middle of the night. His grin grew when Izzy seemed to be mulling the thought over. He raised an eyebrow and chanced a longer glance at the other when he was asked about books. That he hadn’t been expecting, didn’t peg her for a book type. There might be something they were looking for specifically that the old bats had locked away. He would definitely be doing an inventory check but hey it sounded like they were coming around to the idea. A new face and alone time might do him some good, even if they don't get handsy and this Izzy turned out to be a gigantic book worm. 

“Like I said you need a magic key to get in but getting out isn’t a problem, locks behind you but I gotta warn you the cell service sucks,” he said with a smile. He altered his route and started out of town and toward the bunker. The long ride was pretty much silent after that, Dean was honestly a bit too nervous to say something and have the blond change her mind about coming. He couldn't help wanting to help her, wanting to figure her out at least a little. From wanting to protect the little thing and knowing that he would just worry about them at this point. “Just don’t take anything, alright? Not really supposed to take people to the BatCave but…” he trailed off with a shrug after he parked by the bunker, obviously making an exception for the blond right now. 

Izzy shrugged when he mentioned cell service, that meant pretty much nothing to him. Of course he knew what a cell phone was, he had been in this world long enough. But he never felt the need to get one. Who the hell was he gonna call? "No big deal, no cell phone. I was serious, I've never worked with someone else before. Never felt the need to get one," he shrugged, as little like it was normal or something to not have a cell this day and age. He honestly didn't actually know either way though. "And I don't plan on taking anything. I've got my own weapons and shit. Just… looking for a little info is all. If you happen to have a book with what I want to know, well, then I won't really need it anymore once I read it." He ignored the Bat Cave comment for the moment, not wanting to let the hunter next to him realize he actually understood the reference. He especially didn't want him to know he found it amusing.

Dean decided to leave Baby in a little hidden knook they made for when they didn’t plan on staying long and putting her in the very nice garage. He just grinned as they walked up to the old green doors after grabbing a bag from the trunk and he pulled it open for the other. Once past the first threshold Dean unlocked the second doors and stepped through, holding it open for the other. “This is the legacy of the Men of Letters, a bit old and dusty but we’re still fixing the place up.” he said as they made their way down the spirling, metal staircase. He walked past the light up map table and tossed his bag on the first long table in the library. “Wanna tour?” he asked as he turned to the other, smiling at them.

He just wanted a fucking book that explained how humans became demons. Without their souls spending hundreds of years tortured in hell. Asmodues had no choice but to tell him that he turned differently than everyone else when he realized he couldn't just jump from meat suit to meat suit like everyone else could. His soul never left his body, something in him changed while he was still a human. But that was all Asmodues would say on the subject. Honestly it was the one thing about the man who called himself Izzy's master that drove him absolutely insane. He didn't care so much about whatever his human life was since he couldn't miss what he didn't remember or had any sort of idea what it might have been like, but he did want to know why he turned into a demon. Was he evil in his previous life? Is that how it worked? He remembered someone once saying that he must have cracked to change the way he did, but cracked from what and how? He just wanted to know how the fuck he came into existence. What made him so different from other demons. Why even Dagon, who knew that Izzy couldn't kill her without that oh so special gun, feared him to some extent. And nothing he had found so far explained any of that shit. Was he a bookworm? Mmm, debatable. Ask any demon who knew him they'd say no,, but Izzy was really good at keeping things about himself pretty damn secret. The less people knew the less they had on you and the safer you were. But the truth was that he did love books, loved to read and learn. And now that he wasn't under Asmodues' thumb at all times and had a mission to carry out, he was able to use research for said mission as an excuse to read. Sure, he was actually doing research but for so much more than anyone actually knew. 

Izzy was a bit unsure following Dean into the bunker when they got there. This could be a really, really stupid idea. But on the other hand… he was going to have info on the Winchester's no one else could possibly dream of having and he might get a few other answers out of this as well so he followed along. He looked around as Dean led him through the place, tilting his head and letting a confused little look cross his face as he tilted his head back to see the ceiling, "Uh, sure, if you want. So, do you keep the bats in some special room or something? I kinda just pictured them all over the place."

Her not havung a phone probably should have set off more red fags then it did because even if you were a loner it was useful to have one since pay phones were all but extinct. He tilted his own head when Izzy had mentioned bats, that had been a reaction he might have expected from Cas but really? “It’s not really a batca-... never mind. This is our fortress,” he said, just trying to get past what he felt was a painful moment. He turned on his heel and held up his arms out on either side as he gestured to the books. “This is the library. Nothing says stuffy bookworms like having a library right at the front door right?” He said with a laugh, turning completely to face the other as he walked around one of the tables. 

If Izrael actually cared much about completely blending in when he was going by Izzy he probably would have gotten a cell phone. But truth be told, he didn't actually care what humans thought about him and despite Asmodues having insisted he play the part on earth he could probably count on one hand how many times he had ever used the name Izzy before. Since he usually avoided hunters he rarely ever felt the need too. So really… What was the point of carrying around a little electronic box used to call people? The only person who would ever actually want to get ahold of him had his own ways of doing so. But even Asmodues left Izzy to himself for the most part nowadays as long as he kept doing what he was told and continued to work his damnedest to keep Lucifer in his box. Though if he had realized how odd it actually was to not have one, he wouldn't have mentioned it. 

Of course it wasn't actually a Bat Cave. It almost annoyed him that the hunter found it so easy to believe that the batman reference really meant nothing to the blond. Sure, part of him was glad too because he didn't want the fact that he enjoyed those comics to be known by anyone, but still… how stupid did this hunter think he really was if he believed that Izzy? He was pretty sure that Batman was popular among humans. It was the Winchester thinking he was dumb that bothered him more than anything though, because that was just not true. Izzy had always been rather smart, even before he turned, he had a near photographic memory. But with all memories of humanity gone, and those memories being from close to sixty years before anyways, all that was left was hell and the supernatural. And he figured that shit out quickly, easily. Humans, not so much. Humanity and what they were like and what they did like were never on his list of things he needed to learn about. Humans weren't his targets. "No offense, but you don't exactly strike me as the bookworm type," he said, moving around the table to go and look at the spines of the books, fingers running lightly over them. Yeah, this would definitely be his best bet at finding answers. Some of these were obviously old as fuck. "The kill first and ask questions later type. Though I suppose since all you hunters go after everything supernatural, you need the lore books, huh?" He personally didn't bother with any other supernatural beings, just the demons on Lucifer and Dagon's side. Which was probably a good thing for them, if this little demon were to ever start working as a real hunter with someone like Dean… they wouldn't stand a chance. As they had proved earlier… the two of them working on the same side had some pretty nasty consequences for those fighting against them. 

Dean chuckled when Izzy said he didn’t seem like the book worm type, oh hell no that was Sammy’s department. “Yeah no, that's more my brother's thing,” he said as he walked over to the opposite wall, towards the small table with a few bottles filled clear, brown liquid and a few glasses. “I at least wait long enough to see what I'm fighting so I know how to kill it.” Dean poured them a few glasses and headed to the closest main table to the blond. He leaned against it on his hip and took a sip from his glass while he held out the other to Izzy. The other’s wording did strike him as odd though and he raised an eyebrow a little. The way he said it was just off, but Dean wanted to think Izzy was just into demons, and therefore could know some pretty useful stuff. That or maybe he was really green and thought of himself being different from regular hunters. His gut was telling him something was still off though, but he wasn’t sure what.

Izzy was glad his back was to the hunter when he mentioned his brother so he didn't see the little demon roll his eyes and scowl at the mention of that junkie who was seriously getting in his way with that bitch he was attached to. He was pretending he didn't really know much about them… which wasn't a complete lie, but he had a serious suspicion he knew something about the younger Winchester that Dean didn't. He might know about the demon bitch Sam hung out with but he highly doubted this man knew about the blood and psychic shit that boy was playing with. The psychic shit was honestly the main reason he hadn't gone after Ruby yet, he wasn't like other demons, he had no idea how Sam's little exercising shit would affect him. 

“You know, you never mentioned what you were looking into. I’m guessing something demon related,” he mentioned to the other. There wasn’t much small talk on the car ride over.

He didn't say anything for a bit while Dean spoke and walked around the room, more interested in looking through the shelves of books for anything that looked promising. But he never let his guard down really, constantly aware of where Dean was around him or how close he was. He stiffened a bit when he felt Dean closer again and he asked that direct question. Izzy didn't really want to answer anything he was asked, but avoiding taking to him too much might just seem more suspicious. Fuck. He really should have paid more attention to the humans around him the last decade, he was really bad at trying to be one. "Yeah, demon related," Izzy finally said as he turned around and saw Dean holding out the whiskey he had promised. Alcohol didn't really affect him as much as it did humans unless he drank an ungodly amount so he wasn't worried about drinking at least. 

He took the glass offered to him and leaned against the bookshelf behind him, shrugging his shoulder a little, "Don't know if you picked up on it during that whole ambush shit, but I kinda hunt demons. Apparently I'm pretty good at it since they don't seem to like me much at all." He took a drink from the whiskey he was given, relishing in the burn that goes down his throat. As a demon, the little blond didn't need to eat. The few times he did were few and far between and it was always for some reason he couldn't figure out, but knew he just wanted whatever the hell it was that he was trying. But he did like to drink. Alcohol that is. He liked the burn. 

"Just curious what kind of people become demons and how. Always good for a guy to know everything he can about his enemies and all, yanno?" It wasn't a lie. He had actually been avoiding actually lying to the hunter. Izzy didn't like to lie, it was too hard to remember the fake information he had given to who. So the only thing he had lied about was his name, but that wasn't that big of a lie as Izzy did sound like a nickname for Izrael. Mostly, he was just leaving out details he didn't think Dean needed to know. Like the fact he was a demon and really just wanted to know how he, himself, had turned. How demons like him were made. Because as far as the books he had found about demons elsewhere knew, Cain was the only other person to become a demon this way. And almost nothing was fucking known about that man. As a matter of fact, he was the one demon who no matter how hard he tried Izzy could not fucking find. Not that he had really looked into how to find him. He didn't want to kill Cain like he did with everyone else he hunted down, he wanted answers. But even so, he knew Cain wasn't exactly like him and probably didn't have the answers he wanted. So that had just been another fucking dead end. The little blond didn't do a whole lot of shit that he actually wanted to do or something anyways, ninety percent of his time was spent following Asmodues' orders to hunt down Dagon's followers and make sure Lucifer didn't get out of that cage. 

Dean nodded a little when the other confirmed that it was demon related, easy guess. “You don’t pick up that kind of attention without being a major pain in their ass,” he said with a snicker. The man's shoulders stiffened when he took another drink when Izzy said what he was looking into. What kind of people become demons. He forced back a smile and shifted a little as he tried to keep his mind focused on the task at hand and not let it run off with the flashbacks and nightmares he has. It felt like every time he blinked he was hit with a flash of something he’d seen or had done. He told everyone he didn't’ remember any of it and refused to talk about it and self medicated with liquor like any good hunter.

Well duh, obviously he was a pain in their asses. Two dozen of them had actually gotten together without someone in power telling them what to do to try and take him out. They failed, miserably thanks to the hunter near him right now, but it didn't negate the fact that Izzy was a huge threat to them and their plans. Really though, if the whole fucking lot of them just fucking stopped trying to set Lucifer free Izzy would have no problem leaving them alone. But until that happened…. He had a job to do. What the hell would he do with himself if Asmodeus actually managed to take the crown and this mission was over? He'd actually never thought about that before. Every single memory he had had something to do with him having to keep Lucifer in the cage. 

“Well demons are mostly twisted and tortured souls. You get twisted up so much down there you turn into something else,” he said, rubbing at his brow as he fidgeted a little as he spoke. “At the end of the day they're a spirit, just nastier. You don’t normally catch one running around before they possess someone but the same tricks apply, salt and iron,” he told him, running off a few things off the top of his head, mostly from first hand experience. “I’m sure you know all about devils traps and all that,” he said, waving his hand and finally looking over at the other. It was probably a good thing Dean had been so caught up with that Izzy was looking into that he completely missed the suspicious pronoun.

Izzy couldn't help but roll his eyes at Dean when the man just told him shit he already knew. Was he actually under the impression that someone he thought was a legit demon hunter didn't know that shit already? Also. He was wrong. While holy water did have the same effect on him that it did to most demons, salt and iron actually didn't bother him for some reason. Every single voice in his head was screaming at him to keep his mouth shut for a while, to not get sucked into this conversation. But the thing was… he actually wanted to talk about this shit. He never talked with anyone about shit he actually wanted too. Demons avoided him unless they were trying to kill him, he avoided humans and hunters, and Asmodues pretty much just told him what to do. The little demon didn't actually have any memories of just talking with someone about something he was interested in. And this happened to be the biggest fucking intrest he really had right now.

"See, right there just proves you really have no fucking clue what you're actually dealing with, do you? Obviously being tortured in hell is going to fuck up any soul in some way, but not every soul in hell becomes a demon. This world would be fucked if they did. There are millions and millions of souls in hell." He only just stopped himself from pointing out that despite Dean's own torture and escapades with Alastair he didn't actually turn into a demon. No, a fucking angel actually came and pulled him from the pit. So what the hell was it that made some souls twist the same way he had even though he hadn't gone through that die and be tortured shit and made others just… well, be tortured for all eternity. Or torture as was the case with some. "Yeah, most of them are just nastier twisted spirits, and you don't normally see one walking around without someone else's meat suit… but they can. It's apparently super fucking rare for it to happen, but a human can just wake up a demon somehow. In their own skin and everything. So I want to know what makes the souls that twist that way different from those that don't. What kind of person they must have been. And what happens to those people who turn? How does that happen? But unfortunately, because it's so fucking rare, I haven't been able to find a single book in the last ten years that actually explains that shit." He sighed a little in frustration at the thought before just shaking his head and finishing the rest of his own drink before he turned his back to Dean again to start looking through the books again, waving his own hand in dismissal of the subject. Dean wasn't going to have the answers he wanted obviously. "But yes, of course I know all about devils traps. I just don't use them." He couldn't if he wanted too, not unless he wanted to get stuck inside one himself. Besides, even if he could… with the way he hunted, it would be pretty damn useless and time consuming to try since it was usually a sneak attack/ambush of his own on their own grounds. Wasting time with a devils trap when it was just so much easier to kill them just seemed stupid. "Do you have any sort of order with these books or am I gonna have to look through all of them to find the ones about demons?"

Dean was a little taken back when Izzy said that he had no clue about demons. He felt anger rise up in his belly and his face tightened some. His pride didn’t like that but the built up emotion subsided the more Izzy spoke. He did have a point, if that’s all it took then Hell would be nothing but demons. He never really focused on the fine details, he just killed them. His face became a mix of surprises and doubt when Izzy kept going and told him about the type of demons that keep their bodies. What the hell? He’d never heard of something like that before, what the hell could it be capable of? It was a worrying thought. “This keeps getting better and better,” Dean muttered under his breath. He couldn't stop his brain from thinking about his younger brother on his road trip with his little demon buddy. What if that was Ruby's plan, twist his brother into one of them? He’d fucking gank that bitch before she could try. He wanted to call and check up but that hadn’t gone so well last time. 

He made a small face when Izzy asked about an order to the crazy amount of information. He finished his half glass of whiskey and pushed off of the table, setting the glass down before walking away. “I have a feeling what we’re looking for isn’t in here, come on,” He said, motioning the other to follow him with a head nod. He led the blond down the hall a bit, through another doorway and down some stairs. He pushed one of the two heavy doors open and held it open for the other hunter. “When we started going through the stuff that was left here we found that most of the heavy reading books are in here,” He told him. The room was about 25 by 25 feet, metal shelving lined all the walls filled with books and some jars. There was a decent sized table in the middle of the room under the only light, taking up a good chunk of the free space. 

Dean just nearly kidnapped the little blond he helped out that he knew nothing about other than the fact he could kill demons pretty damn well and brought him to his secret bunker and he thought anything that came out of this idea wouldn't be completely fucked? Hell. He was pretty damn sure that Dean didn't even realize yet that he hadn't stepped in to help a pretty little girl, but actually a boy who just happened to look a lot like one. Add on to that fact that this boy was also one of those freaky ass demons he was just talking about and you could see clearly that this man definitely hadn't thought this through. "You have no idea," Izzy mumbled back, not sure or honestly even caring if Dean heard him. 

Izzy set down the glass still in his hand before he shrugged again and followed Dean through the bunker. Fuck. This place really was huge. Izzy couldn't help but grin a little when he looked into the room. Dark. Enclosed. No way for anyone to try and sneak up on him again. Exactly the kind of rooms he liked and usually worked in when he was looking for a party to crash. "Awesome," he said as he walked in the room. Creepy jars and big old books lining the walls on top of everything else, Izzy had instantly and probably noticeably relaxed more when he was in the room that was so much like a place he would actually want to be in. He didn't say anything else as he started scanning the books on one of the shelves, his eyes widening some when he saw what he instantly felt like he had been looking for for years now. It was smaller than any of the other books in here, but that wasn't surprising considering how little information there probably was at all on demons like him. Humans Turning Demon. 

Izzy grabbed the book off the shelf and took a few steps backwards to push himself up to sit on the table, just remembering that Dean was there as he went to open the book. "Uhm… thanks," he said, forcing himself to remember that he was supposed to be a human and actually used to having someone around and even weirder for him- that someone helping him. "Hey… uh, why are you being so like… nice and normal to me? As far as I've seen, people aren't just nice to strangers. Especially when said stranger is a pretty boy who can shove a knife into a human skull."

Dean noticed the small change in the others' demeanor when he showed them the room. The room didn’t bother him or his brother too much but ‘awesome’ wasn’t the normal reaction to this stuff. Though in this line of work, who’s really normal? You see a lot of weird and horrible shit fast and you pick up a few quirks along the way. He had half turned when  the other called out to him and thanked him, he was going to leave Izzy alone to do their digging. He raised an eyebrow when he was asked why he was being so helpful. He opened his mouth with a grin to say it was just the right thing to do for a lady when Izzy said that last part, his words luckily getting caught up in his throat. BOY!? WHOLY FUCK!! Dean’s back straightened as he looked the other over again. It took him a second or two to catch himself and he cleared his throat out a little. “Well you want demons dead and I want demons dead,” he said with a shrug, his brain still trying to absorb this enlightening new detail about the blond. “And I learned about a new fleshy kind of demon, win win,” Dean chuckled. Hell all of Dean seemed stiff. Right now, he honestly didn’t know what the fuck to do.

[lokaneiscanon]

Mighty Thor in Thor: Love and Thunder rant

Seeing Natalie Portman returning to reprise her role as Jane Foster, nevertheless wielding Mjolnir, finally getting the treatment this character deserves, was surreal to say the least. I had just started reading Lords of Midgard, the 8th issue of Mighty Thor (2015 - 2018), and had fallen in love already. But I didn't suspect at all that Taika Waititi would pull this card in Thor: Love and Thunder, considering Jane was barely mentioned in Ragnarok. The news about my favorite actress portraying one of my favorite characters coming out of the blue - you can imagine the excitement. Alas, I quickly remembered what the fandom thought of that comic (at least on tumblr) and imagined it now growing tenfold, cuz not everyone in the MCU fandom reads comics but pretty much everyone wants to watch another Thor movie. And yes, many fans weren't ready for this step, still recovering from Sam Wilson getting the shield in Endgame. Which is completely fine. We're not obligated to like everything Marvel throws in our faces, we're allowed to criticize and express our opinion on the internet or wherever. What is not okay is mindlessly hating, and even worse - using false facts to support said opinion.

I have seen some people using the argument that it is one of Marvel's worst selling comics. Which has already been proven wrong by multiple sites, including Comichron, just Google it, as I did myself. I read multiple posts, ones saying how good Jane is doing as Thor in sales, others disproving this, so I checked for myself the numbers at the site mentioned above month by month to be sure. The comic truly had its downfalls as the story progressed but in my opinion it's normal for the 1st issue to have more sales than the 21st. If we compare it to Unworthy Thor, which started running a bit later and followed the now unworthy Odinson, the data shows the latter had more sales. But then again, while Might Thor was at its 17th issue, Unworthy Thor was at its 2nd. Also, they later crossed paths, shared comic issues, it's fair to say they go hand in hand and Jason Aaron, the author, probably doesn't want us to compare them, as they complete and compliment each other's stories. Still I decided to check the comic that made Thor unworthy in the first place - Thor: God of Thunder (2012 - 2014), which seemed to me more "comparable" to Might Thor (2015 - 2018). *I keep putting the years it was being released so as to not be confused with previous Mighty Thor issues, whole Odinson was still Thor, please bear with me* So yes, the numbers were pretty close, but from what I saw, Mighty Thor had the upper hand if we compare first issue to first issue and so on. (In defense of Odinson, we have to take into account that this data is only from the US and does not include digital sales. Also, he's been around since the 50s. We could argue Jane was a breath of fresh air that some Marvel fans were indeed ready for. As a non-American, and also a person without a hint of knowledge in economics I cannot take into account inflation and whatever else has prevented or enabled Americans to get their hands on the comics or has affected prizes through the years. Bear that in mind.) Moreover, from what I saw on Comichron, both comics had much competition - God of thunder was released along with Avengers vs the X-men, the Uncanny X-men, pretty popular at the time, and the Goddess of Thunder faced Civil War 2 and DC Universe Rebirth (yes, DC is in the game too), also dominating with tremendous sales for the longest time. Yet I stick with my original statement - both Thors are valid and shouldn't be put against one another regardless of profit. Because at the end of the day what will matter the most is the story. And boy, what a story it is.

Now, I haven't read the Thor: God of Thunder, but as I was doing research I found one very well written summary and explanation of Thor's arc and his becoming unworthy and I will post a link below, because I honestly feel I wouldn't be doing this comic a favor by describing it without having read it. Which I plan to do in the future, tbh. It's a fantastic prelude to the Mighty Thor (2015 - 2018) that I've come to love. First, I'd like to ask you all to stop hating on the comic without having read it first. It doesn't make any sense and being petty for the sake of being petty won't benefit neither you, nor anyone, really. Now, about the comic itself - the art is magnificent. It's just gorgeous. Mighty Thor isn't , thank all the gods, sexualized, she is pretty buffed and generally looks like a warrior. As it is with the other characters, I dare say. The background truly captures the essence of every world Jane finds herself on. Action scenes are just the right amount and balanced with dialogue well. On a side note, it's pretty funny to read/listen to in your head the Shakespearean English cursive in which Jane talks as Thor. The plot line branches beyond this comic, starting from Thor: God of Thunder and leading to the War of Realms. And it is elaborately built in every issue. You don't know what to expect, yet it makes sense when it happens. Which leads me to the characterizations. My God, what a treat Loki is in this. Clearly, my opinion is kinda biased, since he's my favorite character, but you never know which side he's on. What his motivations are. And it just feels so... Loki. His writing is brilliant. Almost makes me forget what the MCU did to him. Also, he gets some daddy time with Laufey (not as kinky as I make it sound). Frigga/Freyja is just as awesome as in the MCU, even more, at least in the comics she calls Odin out on his shit, who btw is I guess an asshole in every version and universe. Malekith, the main villain, is unbearably despicable, I want to tear every page he is on. He really was mishandled in the Dark World, if you want some true action with the dark elves, you are welcome to enjoy. I saved the best for the end - Jane Foster/ Might Thor. Now, if you think Dr. Foster spends her time boasting about her worthiness and how Odinson is just called Thor, but she is Mighty Thor, you are horribly wrong. She just... does her job. Because the hammer chose her. Because there's no one else to do so. That's it. If you think there's some feminism involved, yes, there sure is, but it certainly isn't the reason Jane became Thor in the first place. It was not the creators going SJW because it's trendy, as such a mindset is honestly offensive to any descent creator with any self respect, but a well thought out story arc, which, I repeat, you have to read the comic to understand. Jane is not at all whiny about the hate she gets in-universe, not only from foes like Odin and who-not, but from Shield and generally people whose asses she's saving. Her having cancer is not something they pulled to provoke sympathy and make her look like a victim - on the contrary, she is a damn hero and a victor. I don't want to give out spoilers, but her being Thor is actually a giant sacrifice that no one really appreciates (both in-universe and in the fandom). She is not Thor to prove she can be, or just to prove "women can be heroes" - she doesn't have to. She is simply needed by the realms and so she does her job, even though she is called a thief, persecuted and generally hated. All that matters is that the hammer finds her worthy - the beauty and simplicity of that fact you will find out, for the last time, if you read the comic.

I'm not making you read the comic or watch Thor: Love and Thunder. I myself don't know what to make of this film yet because there's barely any information about it. I only know it will be based on the comic so that's a reason for my hopes to be up already. On the other hand, since I didn't like Loki's characterization in Ragnarok, I'm not sure what to expect from Taika. There are valid reasons to not like the idea of Jane returning to the MCU as Thor, which you are entitled to. However, reasons such as "why does everything have to be political these days" are not. Because if I had to make a list of everything politically related in the MCU, it would take forever. Steve Rogers kills nazis is the most blatant example. Make of it what you want. But I think we're far enough into the 21st century to realize art and real life are not that separable. It's undeniable that art affects people and that is to say, people everywhere. And they all have different opinions and aren't gonna like everything media is offering to them. And I wish I could simply tell you not to watch the movie but I'm a Marvel fan too and I understand that I can't just take away Thor from you because I want Mighty Thor as well. But none of us can stop Marvel from producing it. So, to quote an image I saw recently, I don't know how to explain to you that you should care about other people. Let the rest of the fandom enjoy what they want to enjoy. Yes, ik I can play around with the tags and avoid posts that unnerve me but, for example, I'm looking up Mighty Thor fanart, which obviously isn't anti-Mighty Thor, yet I get attacked in the comics for anticipating a movie that doesn't even have a full cast yet. Ik I'm not asking for too much when I wish to get the same internet experience (not only tumblr, but also insta, YouTube, Twitter, any site) as the Thor Odison fans, for example. I'm aware I cannot stop all the toxic fans and the trolls but I hope this post has inspired those of you who simply can't envision Jane as Thor, or don't like Natalie Portman in the role, or whatever eles personal preference that doesn't involve political issues and isn't harmful to the community, not to attack every post on your dash with hate. The movie is called LOVE and Thunder, for God's sake. (on a side note, is a franchise that is too afraid to show LGBT characters for more than 1 minute so as to not lose profit from China, THAT politically correct)

Anyway, that was a veeeery long rant, sorry to whoever reads this but, like, please, I put effort into this, hoping this time around I won't be the only positive reviewer of a movie, like I was with Solo: a Star Wars story (yes, I'm still bitter about this), which was boycotted for no apparent reason but was a decent film in reality, and I'm only bringing it up because it has a similar experience to Love and Thunder for getting hate before even being released. I'm not defending a billion dollar company that flopped in box office once, I'm defending the viewer's right to media they are interested in. If you don't like the character, remember - that's your opinion, not a fact that the character sucks. Kudos.

Not very easy to navigate, I advice you to do the research month by month individually for comics you'd like to compare. Also, if you happen to find more reliable data, pls say so in the comments.

Here you have the summary and explanation of the greatness of Thor: God of Thunder, Jesus, I'll go bankrupt if I buy this one too.

Yes, I want to end the sales dispute once and for all, I'm tired of seeing it on my dash. This guy probably explains it better than I did.

@awesomejenlawrence you said you'd like to read this and I delivered

[muggle-writes]

Rules: Answer 21 questions and then tag 21 people who you want to get to know better.

tagged by @elizabethsyson

Nickname: Muggle is my nickname, but when I went by Muggle in person for more than a month at a time, it naturally got abbreviated, usually to Mugz

Zodiac: Aquarius

Last movie I saw: into the spiderverse (same answer as last time. I don't watch that many movies tbh except around Christmas. unless YouTube counts in which case... music of some sort? idk links for the next answer)

Favorite musician: changes by the day. I've kinda been in an acapella and/or folk music mood recently so the Maccabeats and Peter Hollens are in my YouTube and Spotify history a lot recently. also I'm eternally in awe of Forte Handbell Quartet (eta a longer video; i recommend skipping to the techno piece or the Jurassic Park theme)

Last thing I googled: "vine why are you buying clothes at the soup store" (my wife hasn't seen it; also i can't find the vine because apparently it's a much bigger meme than I realized). before that it was "chgrp not root" because work and group permissions are useful when they work

Song stuck in my head: well for most of the day when I haven't been actively listening to something, it's been the Pokemon RSE route-walking music. (but that somehow happens frequently when I'm in the no-music-no-internet room at work, as I was for most of the day, and I don't know how I accidentally trained my brain to make that connection). right now, surprisingly, I don't have any background music playing in my head. I think it's because the humidifier provides just enough white noise that my brain doesn't feel the need to provide its own

Other blogs: my main is @muggle-the-hat and I'm a mod on @why-do-neurotypicals but we've gotten one ask ever so that blog has been dormant for a while. I have a bunch of other sideblogs, but they're all small and I use different screen names on each of them (enby life: no idea which name suits me best so I may as well try them out) so i feel like it would just confuse things to link them.

Following: blogs matching all the themes of my sideblogs, (including this one, which is writeblr), korean langblr, jumblr, assorted fandom blogs, authors of my more favorite fanfictions (some overlap with other categories), and irl friends and acquaintances (including one fandom blog turned irl friend)

Do I get asks: on my main if at all, which isn't really surprising because i have hundreds of followers there and maybe 60 followers combined among the rest. but I get asks far less often than I reblog ask memes so... I'm always happy to get more. I do get tagged in ask games more on this one, but writeblr is actually vaguely organized about tag lists so that makes sense. also I used to get tagged a bunch on my main and I rarely could find the posts again to follow up when I had time to answer.

What I’m Wearing: pajamas. staying warm and cozy

Lucky number: I don't remember what I said last time, but I like a lot of numbers. 64 is a good number. recently I've been debugging software in which 0x3E is my lucky status number and 0x0E taunts me. (um, decimal 62 and 14). Also my other favorite number i can't share until it's no longer the combination to the lock to the Secret Room. (or realistically never because opsec and i shouldn't make public the types of parents we use for that combination lock), honestly I aim to be like.... ah, I'm sure the anecdote involves G.H. Hardy but i don't remember on which side. anyway one mathematician remarked to another about how the id number of the taxi he rode in was sadly uninteresting, and the one I aspire to be like, argued "what are you talking about, this number is interesting because ______" and I'd like to be able to do that for any arbitrary number thrown at me. (hi yes math is good, history is hard, math history is interesting yet i still forget the people even if i remember the math. except when things are named after people, but that tends to be, like, Euler and LaGrange and other people who did lots of cool science things so i remember the methods and the names of the methods separately which never helps)

Amount of sleep: ....depression both screws with my sleep schedule and means I always feel like I need more sleep except when I wake up at 5pm and feel like I've wasted the day. so yeah. I can never get enough sleep

Favorite food: yes (why do I have to pick a favorite?) uh, chocolate in most forms, many other sweet things, red meats (especially if served with potatoes), curry (especially if it has "too much" ginger), fresh-baked bread, chai the way my favorite local Indian restaurant makes it (spicier with just a little bit of sweet, which is the opposite of what i can get from the mocha machine at work which is wayyy sweet with a hint of spice but that inferior chai is still superior to coffee so i drink too much of it). also vegetables which I really don't eat enough of: sauteed zucchini and onions, roasted broccoli

Dream trip: dreaming requires creativity and tbh I funnel that mostly into my writing instead. I wouldn't mind going back to Korea for another visit though

Dream job: my current job is pretty good when I feel productive and when my debugging tools actually produce data maybe??? (they were not being helpful today. but i still mostly like my job.) dream job is probably this but with seniority and confidence and double the salary (while living in a similar area of the country; I wouldn't want to double my salary by moving to work for Google in California and having less available after rent than I do now)

Describe yourself as aesthetic things:

the smell of old books

the first glow of sunrise (the sunrise painting the mountains pink and gold)

a rainbow in the spray from a waterfall

the flicker of distant lightning (watching a thunderstorm fade into the distance)

this picture

Random fact: about me or about the world?

how about a combination answer: when we got our new handbell music this season, we only looked at half the pieces our first rehearsal and afterwards I tried to look up one of the pieces we hadn't gotten to on YouTube because it's got a weird time signature and I wanted to get a feel for how fast it would go and how strict the counting is...... except it turns out we're the first group to ever play the piece. it was commissioned recently but seeing my conductor's name on the page didn't tell me how new it was because he's super prolific. (the fact that it was on printer paper without the publisher's graphics should have been a giveaway but it's only the second time I've been among the first to play one of his pieces so I think I can be excused for not realizing)

Languages: mostly just English, but I took Spanish for years, so I can hold simple conversations in it. I can almost read sound out Hebrew fast enough to keep up in services, and I know some random Hebrew vocab but comparatively no grammar. and I took Korean in college, enough that I can recognize sentence structure but I can really only speak tourist-Korean, though I can sound anything out (if it's typed. handwriting is hit or miss.) in both Hebrew and Korean (and Spanish tbh but i don't often listen to Spanish music) I'm very proud when I can separate the words enough, listening to a song, to translate them without looking up the lyrics. also I tried to learn Japanese from Duolingo when it was new, but I still hadn't gotten the kana straight when it started progressing to kanji so that was a rough time and I went back to Hebrew.

tbh I "dabble" in "language learning" which really means I start a million courses on Duo and stick with none of them. with the notable exception of French, which I acknowledge is super common and probably a good idea to learn but the spelling and pronunciation seem so arbitrary I'm scared to look close enough to learn it properly, and I've never particularly considered starting the Duolingo course for French

I think I lost a few questions, because that's only 18 answers. whoops.

um... who to tag

@abluescarfonwaston if school hasn't drowned you in work yet and @copperscales I'm interested in both of your choices for lucky numbers especially.

... wow I'm blanking on other mutuals I haven't tagged recently. as usual lmk if you'd like to be edited in, or just answer the questions and tag me back, that's great too.

[not-poignant]

Reading your original works, I'm kind of inspired to post my own on Ao3 as well (I can't publish as I write mostly queer pairings but I live in a place where doing so would put my safety at risk). But I was wondering Pia, is it safe to do so in terms of plagiarizers? Since anyone could access my work for free, would they be able to copy it? (Thanks if you reply!)

The thing with copyright is that if you publish it - it’s yours. If you can establish provenance (i.e. prove that you have drafts on your computer and so on) it’s yours. Copyright protection for original works (artwork, writing and so on) doesn’t require you to do anything special to be eligible for copyright protection, basically.

And AO3 is amazing at chasing up copyright issues.

Also, like, people scaremonger. The chances of original works being plagiarised are exceedingly low. In um...oh god, like 15 years of writing fanfiction, I’ve had my works stolen exactly twice. Once was for a phishing database so I didn’t give a shit (it got shut down anyway - people remember that whole thing right?). And once was someone who basically rewrote all of SALverse in their own words, complete with including Augus and so on - but they accidentally left whole sections in that were mine; whoops. I chased it up on AO3 and it was removed, although the plagiarised version is still on fanfiction.net (honestly that place is trash for site support, don’t use it). That being said, I don’t really care, because it’s not like it’s taking readers away from me (it’s not, it’s pretty badly written).

But that’s like two times out of an aggregate of hundreds of thousands of hits over many many many years.

(Art is a different matter. I’ve had my art stolen a lot and I’m pretty zen about it. I have my template Cease and Desist letter, DeviantArt helps you out eventually, and Etsy is respectful when you chase up that shit.)

To be honest, the biggest risk with posting original work on AO3 is not actually about theft at all, but these matters (rest under a readmore in case you don’t care about the rest lol):

* AO3 explicitly states it’s not a database for original fiction. Which means support and tag wrangling and so on for original fiction vs. fanfiction is low. You can’t for example ‘categorise’ your original fiction into subgenre or anything like that.

* AO3 audiences are generally highly resistant to original fiction (i.e. most have never looked for it on AO3 and nor do they want to read it on AO3). They may read original fiction on Wattpad (and indeed this seems to be the place to put it, I think), but unless you’re releasing chapter-by-chapter or already have like...a fanfiction readerbase who will follow you to original work; it will be very hard to find readers. This is primarily because readers search first and foremost by fandom and not by tag. Original fiction gets drowned as a result.

* If you ever wish to make a profit off your original work that you put on AO3, you cannot link to any profit-making sites on AO3, nor can you ‘hold back’ sections of story and make people pay for it (this isn’t a problem for me (but this is the reason I never say I have a Patreon on AO3), or indeed a lot of people on AO3, but I’ve seen people use original fiction on AO3 for this matter getting swiftly and quickly warned and then sometimes banned from the site - this is so that AO3 can preserve their not-for-profit status, and it will never change as a result - I think it’s awesome and fully support this, and am tired of authors whining about it but that’s a whole other matter).

I would love to see more original work on AO3, and I don’t know your general fandom/fanfiction experience (i.e. if I knew you were a fanfiction writer I’d probably be wording things a little differently? Like, have you written queer fanfiction before? That helps a lot on AO3), but it’s definitely worth keeping in mind that AO3 is first and foremost a fanworks site, and that even if you’re putting up solely original content, it helps to orient to AO3 from a fandom / fanworks perspective (i.e. serialise longer works instead of releasing everything at once, list shorter works with fandom-friendly tags like PWP or hurt/comfort etc., establish a fandom-friendly presence elsewhere, like Tumblr or Twitter or Dreamwidth or something, so that people actually know you exist, because they won’t find you through the Original Works tag, let’s be real.)

As for plagiarism, honestly, people worry about it way more than necessary. To date, that I know of, no person has come to AO3 and stolen original fiction and tried to make a profit off it. (However, I have seen in the m/m original novel industry, people stealing actually published novels and republishing them under another name and making a profit off those, which is like, a consequence of so many novels flying under the radar due to self-publishing lol. And even then, it gets chased up, it gets dealt with.) Works can always be reported; and you know, they are. 9/10 I found out about art theft because someone who liked my art said ‘hey I saw this and am not sure you gave your permission for this’ or ‘this person is stealing your art.’ And that one time the SALverse was plagiarised, a reader told me. So that side of things helps a lot).

(I’m sorry to hear you can’t publish for safety reasons, as well. Make sure your protections online re: publishing are solid in that sense, because the same risks that exist for those who indie self-publish under pseudonyms, also exist for those who publish under the same on AO3, and obviously I don’t know what your situation is - and I think it’s awesome that you’re wanting to take the leap - just...yeah. I imagine this is all stuff you’ve considered already though, and AO3 is an often-overlooked site which makes it easier to fly under the radar on too. But so is Wattpad, and it’s a lot friendlier to original fiction - may be worth looking into as well? Good luck anon!