#I can't do this anymore it makes me dread every time she comes into my room to talk to me about some new thing she doesn't like about me. I

[flower-zombie-rob]

Welcome to day one of how many times can my mother tear me down and destroy my confidence in one go. How many days will this go on? Im not sure! Tune in next time for a brand new episode of Taking Advantage Of My Kids Rejection Sensitivity, youre watching the disney channel.

[mopopshop]

headcannons about taurasi when reader and her are arguing , angst, possible smut 👀

Lost Love

Summary: DT’s late practices are straining her marriage to Aniyah (reader). As loneliness and unspoken words drive apart, both must confront their unraveling relationship and search for a way back to each other.

y’all this might be too angsty honestly LMAO but i’m actually kinda proud of it😓🙏🏾

send more requests!! i’m gonna close them after tomorrow

It’s once again another late night, alone, sad, and in the dark.

Diana’s practices have been getting later and later these past few weeks. You’ve tried to be understanding, tried to support her as best as you can. After all, you knew what you were signing up for when you married a professional athlete. But tonight, it feels like the loneliness has swallowed you whole.

When you finally hear the sound of keys jangling at the door, you sit up, your heart heavy with a mix of anticipation and dread. Diana steps in, looking exhausted and barely acknowledging your presence. 

"Hey," she mumbles, dropping her bag by the door.

"Hey," you reply, trying to keep your voice steady. "Another late night."

She shrugs, not meeting your eyes. "Yeah, practice ran over. Again."

There’s a tension in the air, thick and palpable. You’ve had this conversation too many times before, and yet, here you are again, hoping for a different outcome.

"D, we need to talk," you start, your voice trembling slightly.

"About what?" she snaps, her tone sharper than intended. "I’m tired, okay? Can we do this later?"

"No, we can’t," you say, standing your ground. "We’ve been putting this off for too long. I’m tired too, D. Tired of feeling like I’m not a priority in your life."

Her eyes finally meet yours, and you see a flicker of guilt before she hardens her expression. "You knew what this was when we got together. This is my career. This is important."

"And what about us?" you ask, your voice breaking. "Aren’t we important? I— I am your wife for christ’s sake! 

She sighs, running a hand over her face. "Yeah I fuckin’ know that. I’m the one who goddamn proposed to you Niyah-“

"But it doesn't feel like it anymore!" you shout, cutting her off. The dam of your pent-up frustration and hurt bursts open. "You act like your career is the only thing that fucking matters! When was the last time we had a real conversation? When was the last time you actually listened to me?"

Diana's eyes flash with anger. "I am doing everything I can! Do you think I wanna- wanna come home to this? You think I enjoy arguing with you? Being yelled at after practice? I’m working my ass off every damn day to support us, babe. I'm giving it my all out there!

"And what about in here?" you counter, pointing to the space between you. "What about giving your all to this marriage? I feel like I'm just an inconvenience to you now, D. Like I'm something you have to deal with instead of someone you want to be with."

She shakes her head, her jaw tight. "That's not fair. You know how demanding this job is. You knew it from the start."

"Knowing it and living it are two different things," you say, tears welling up in your eyes. "I can't keep pretending that everything's okay when it's not. I can't keep sitting here every night, wondering if you'll even remember to come home."

Diana throws her hands up in exasperation. "What do you want from me, Niyah? To quit? To give up everything I've worked for?"

"I want you to fight for us as hard as you fight on that court!" you cry, your voice trembling. "I want to feel like I matter to you, like I'm not just some fuckin’ second thought."

Diana clenches her fists, moving closer so now the two of you are yelling inches apart. "You're not a second thought," she insists, but the conviction in her voice wavers. "But I can't drop everything for you. I can't just walk away from my career."

"I'm not asking you to walk away," you reply, your tone desperate. "I'm asking you to find a balance. To show me that you care. To make some time for us, for me."

Diana's eyes narrow, her frustration boiling over. "Balance? You think that's easy? Do you have any idea how hard it is to keep up with everything? To stay at the top of my game? I can't just turn it off when I come home!"

"And I can't just turn off my feelings!" you shout back, shoving her lightly. "Every night, I'm here waiting, hoping you'll walk through that door and actually see me. But jesus D, it's like I'm invisible to you.”

You turn down the hallway, stalking towards your room as Diana follows you. 

“D, don’t fuckin’ follow me I’m done with this shit and I’m tired” you say exasperatedly and huff your way into a sitting position on the bed, trying to speak over her

"No! I am gonna follow you and I am gonna keep talking ‘cause that shit you just said isn’t  true, Niyah," she says, her voice rising. "I do see you. But I can't always be here. I have responsibilities, commitments. This is my life!"

"And what about our life?" you counter, your voice trembling with anger and hurt. "What about the promises we made to each other? Does any of that matter to you anymore?"

Diana looks away, the conflict in her eyes clear. "Of course it matters," she mutters, but the words sound hollow.

"Then why does it feel like you're choosing everything else over us?" you ask, your voice breaking. "I need you, Diana. I need you to be present, to be here. Not just physically, but emotionally."

She takes a deep breath, her frustration palpable. "I genuinely don't know what you want from me, Niyah. I'm doing the best I can."

"Your best isn't enough!" you shout, the words hanging in the air like a final blow. "I need more. We need more."

Diana's face hardens, her eyes flashing with anger. "And I need you to understand that I can't always give more. This is my career, my dream. I can't sacrifice that."

"And I can't keep sacrificing my happiness," you reply, your voice barely above a whisper. "I love you, D… I love you so so much— but I can't keep living like this. Feeling like I'm always waiting for you to remember that I exist."

The silence that follows is deafening, the weight of your words settling heavily between you. Diana's shoulders slump, the fight seeming to drain out of her.

"I don't know how to fix this," she finally says, her voice low and strained. "I don't know if I can."

"Neither do I," you admit, tears streaming down your face. "But something has to change, Diana. We can't keep going on like this."

Diana looks at you, her expression a mixture of pain and resignation. "Maybe... maybe we need some space. To figure things out. To see if this can even work."

The words hit you like a punch to the gut, but deep down, you know she's right. "Yeah," you say, your voice barely above a whisper. "Maybe you should go."

Diana nods slowly, the decision weighing heavily on both of you. She turns and heads toward the bedroom door, pausing briefly as if to say something, but the words never come. Instead, she grabs a few essentials and heads back to the living room to gather her things.

As she leaves, the sound of the door closing behind her feels final, like a chapter ending in your life. You sit on the edge of the bed, the tears flowing freely now. The loneliness you've been feeling these past few weeks intensifies, and the emptiness of the house seems to swallow you whole.

You lie down, curling into a ball as the sobs wrack your body. The bed feels too big, too cold without her. You clutch the pillow where her scent still lingers, but it offers little comfort.

The silence is deafening, broken only by your muffled cries. You lie there, heartbroken and alone, wondering how it all came to this and if there will ever be a way to bridge the gap that's grown between you and the woman you love.

———

[midnightsnyx]

girl at home | mat barzal | part 11

pairing: mat barzal x reader

warning: alcohol and angst word count: 1288k (sorry)

authors note: i can't wait for nora to break everyone's heart in this chapter :) :) :) anyway im so sorry this is short and 100% a filler chapter but I need it to be able to write what will happen next. pls comment even if it’s constructive criticism because comments feed my writing soul 🩵 big big thanks to @justonemorewallflower for editing this!!

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The aftermath of her is interesting, to say the least. Training camp is creeping up and soon, Mat will have to return to New York. The two of you had a long but enlightening conversation shortly after his breakdown at your apartment. You had woken up the next morning to Nora’s foot digging into your kidney and Mat’s feet near your face but all the discomfort evaporated when the three of you made breakfast together. 

For the first time since Mat found out about Nora, you didn’t have anxiety or dread hanging over your shoulders. You weren’t worrying about other people's opinions or how Mat is adjusting or crazy girlfriends. You’re finally able to focus on trying to figure out how exactly to make this work.

Mat on the other hand, is doing everything he can to try and make up for everything but he’s going a tad overboard. 

“She does not need a kitten, Mathew,” you say firmly, refusing to look at his phone that has a picture of a kitten. 

“C’mon, look at that cute little fluffy baby,” he says, trying to push the phone closer to you. “It’ll teach her responsibility!” 

“She’s six,” you remind him, picking up a blanket off the couch and folding it. Mat’s been sleeping at your apartment but on the couch, much to Nora’s dismay. She assumes now that Mat isn’t dating anyone, you and Mat will get back together. The look of relief on her face when Mat told her Calista wasn’t going to be around anymore made you want to cry. You hadn’t truly understood just how much Mat’s toxic relationship was affecting Nora.

However, her insistence that you and Mat get married now is getting a bit out of hand. 

“We should talk about it,” he says quietly, snapping you out of your thoughts. 

He’s not talking about the kitten now. He’s referring to what kind of living situation you’re going to have come hockey season.

“Yeah,” you sigh, placing the final blanket on the pile and turning to face him. He looks unsure, eyes darting around the room and looking everywhere except at you. 

It’s unusual to see him unsure about himself. The Mat you knew when you were young was confident and rarely doubted anything. 

The past two months changed that, Nora changed it.

“I know you said that you don’t want to move-”

“Mat,”

“-but what if we just do weekends?” 

You give him a dry look. “Weekends? You want me and Nora to fly to New York every weekend? What are we, Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift?”

“If you’d told me about her in the first place, this wouldn’t be an issue!” He snaps, and you flinch because he’s right. If you had listened to what everyone was telling you seven years ago, and told Mat about Nora, you wouldn’t be in this situation. You had your reasons though, and you’ll stand by them.

“You’re never going to forgive me for that, are you?”

He shrugs. “I don’t know how I can.”

. . .

Bringing up the news that Mat has to go back to New York soon does not go over well with Nora. You’ve seen her throw tantrums before, but this is next level. She locks herself in her bedroom and refuses to come out, demanding for grandma Nadia to come to your apartment, which is an easy fix. One phone call and she’s at the front door.

Nora opens her bedroom door when she hears Nadia’s voice, but still looks suspicious when she opens it enough for her to squeeze through. They’re in her room for about fifteen minutes before they both come out, Nadia looking exasperated but somber at the same time.

They stand in front of you and Mat, Nora staring at the floor and Nadia looking at the two of you. 

“Nora would like to ask the New York Islanders owners to relocate to British Columbia,” she says, pressing her lips together. You can’t tell if she’s trying not to laugh or not to cry. 

Mat kneels down so he’s at Nora’s height and hesitantly takes her hands in his. “We can definitely write them a letter peanut, but that’s a lot easier said than done.”

She’s looking at the ground still but you can see teardrops hitting the floor and your heart breaks even more, if possible.

“Why?” She sniffles and Mat gives you a desperate look. You’ve been a mom for six years, he hasn’t even been a dad for 2 months.

“Nora,” you say softly but firm enough that she looks up at you. “I explained how hockey works, remember?”

“Yeah,” she mumbles, sniffling. “But maybe if we explain, they’ll change it.”

You kneel down so you’re at her level and wipe her face. “They won’t, baby.”

She starts sobbing when you say that, throwing one arm around you and one around Mat. You keep yourself from breaking down but you can hear Nadia sniffing quietly and Mat’s shoulders are shaking. 

All you wanted was for Nora to know Mat and his family but nothing has worked out the way you planned. You have no idea how it got to this point and you’re not sure if it’s going to be able to be fixed.

. . .

“What are you wishing for this year?” You asked Nora before she blew out the candles for her fifth birthday.

She tapped her chin a few times before grinning. “A daddy!” 

Nobody else heard her and she was too distracted to see the heartbroken look on your face.

. . . 

“Figure anything out yet?” Marlee asks, putting a glass of wine in front of you.

After taking a sip of your wine, you shake your head. “Nope. I can’t uproot Nora’s life, and Mat has to go back to New York.”

He’s been trying to spend as much time with her the past few days after her breakdown. They’re at the Barzal household tonight so you’re at Marlee’s, trying to forget for a while. You have no idea what to do and it’s killing you. Nora has been quiet and distant, and you don’t know what to read of that. Part of you wonders if she wants to move to New York with Mat, but deep down you know your daughter and if you just take her away from everybody and everything she knows, it won’t end well. 

“I don’t know what to tell you,” Marlee says, being completely unhelpful. You know she can’t solve your problems but you thought she would at least have some advice. 

“You got nothing?” You ask dryly. 

She sighs, looking up at the ceiling before turning her gaze to you. “Look, moving to New York? Probably a bad idea, but is it worth trying? Maybe.”

You narrow your eyes at her. “How many glasses of wine have you had?”

“This is my first, thank you very much,” she sniffs. 

“But you’re suggesting I move Nora to New York?” You ask incredulously. This is completely out of character for Marlee. She’s usually the one who thinks things through.

“A trial,” she says. “Try moving to New York with Mat. The worst that will happen is you and Nora coming home.”

Even though she’s saying this nonchalantly, she’s staring into her wine glass  thoughtfully. You know she wouldn’t have suggested it if she hadn’t thought it through.

The idea of moving is daunting and you’re not sure if you will even be able to go through with it. She’s right though, you could do a trial before Nora starts school. See how life in New York with Mat would be. If it would work.

“You really think it could work?” You ask quietly. 

“You won’t know until you try.”

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[rukkiya]

promise me

(wriostesley x reader)

୨⎯ his worst fear becomes a reality, but you promised him you’d be safe ⎯୧

“Wriothesley listen, Lyney wouldn't let that happen. Not again, I trust him.” You turn to the tall man behind you, seeing the uncertainty in his eyes making you feel bad for stressing him out so much.

“That's the thing, I don't. You trust people too easily, you have to be– I just don't know what I'd do if….” Wriothesley exhales, dropping his gaze from yours when he so much as thinks about the worst. He can't stand it, since the primordial sea water incident, the latest trial put him on edge.

“Hey Wrio-” you feel your heart tug, you know he's worried. Your legs move closer to the tall man, your hands reach up to his face, gently laying upon his cheeks. “It won't happen, whatever you’re thinking about, erase it from your mind.” you move your hands from his face and reach for his hands, grabbing them and placing them both over your heart.

“I’m here, ok? I won't leave you, no one can take me from you.” you squeeze his hand in yours when he drops his head.

“You have to promise me if someone, anyone tries to take you from me, you’ll put on one hell of a fight for me.” He pulls you close by your waist, resting his head on your shoulder. “Please say it for me darling.”

“You know I won't let someone try and separate me from you that easily right? I'll stay safe, you have my word.” you promise him, feeling his arms wrap around your torso pulling you up to him.

He has every right to be this wary, the cases of missing people have tripled since the trial and the whereabouts of who is involved is still very much a mystery.

“I promise.” you repeat, the feeling of unease rising in your chest. The thought of having Wriothesley taken from you that way makes you sick.

I promise

Your own voice rings in your head as you stir, hissing when you move your head to the side in the slightest.

Promise me

You hear Wriothesley's voice, close yet far. Something feels off.

You open your eyes only to close them immediately, the surrounding light too bright for your eyes making you groan.

‘-/n….” you hear someone whisper next to you.

“Y/n, wake up!” the voice is louder, making you turn and open your eyes again.

You blink a few times at the figure laying next to you, then your eyes widen.

“L-Lyney?” you ask, brows drawing together seeing his hands tied together. You feel him bring up his hands to cover your mouth to stop you from speaking anymore.

“Shhh.” He brings one of his hands to his mouth and looks to the side, making you look down the same direction.

You couldn’t see much but you were in the building where Lyney and Lynette usually practice for their shows.

They had asked you to be a part of their upcoming performance soon so you had accepted the offer to get out of your comfort zone.

“They’re here.” Lyney whispers from beside you making you look back at him.

“Who is? Where’s Lynette? Is she ok?” You ask, more and more confused as you try and think back to what exactly happened.

You recall this morning, Wriothesley being worried and telling you to stay safe. Warning you about the primordial sea water and the uprise in missing people cases.

“Stay calm.” Lyney whispers, catching your attention. “I won’t let them do anything to you ok? Lynette left before they broke in. I’m sure she knows better if she feels something off when coming back, she won’t get caught, she’ll get us help.” He assures you and you feel your heart drop, it can’t be.

“Is it them?” You ask barely above whisper, Lyney looks away from you for a second, the look of dread when you come to realize who was here was making him feel horrible.

“They won’t do anything, I won’t-“

“Well well Mr. Lyney, I'm a big fan of your work!” A man's voice makes you freeze as he appears in your peripherals.

“A big fan huh? Then why would a person who admires my work treat me in such a way, it really pains me you know?” Lyney fake pouts, keeping his usual facade up though you know he was just as panicked as you.

“Why? Well you see, you’d never let me perform such a trick, even if I had approached you and asked you’d deny me on the spot. I had to take matters into my own hands.” The man hums, kneeling down in front of you two.

“What trick were you thinking of? I’m sure I would’ve been inclined to hear, having people being part of the show is what makes it better after all!” Lyney smiles, his eyes closing as he does so.

“It’s similar to the one you had performed in the court house you see, except. It involves a certain substance that can truly make one disappear!” The man smiles wide, hands clasping together.

Lyney goes quiet, you look back at him and see no smile left on his face.

“Surely you're not indicating that primordial water, us magicians have other means as to where the people we make disappear are still here afterwards, it’s all part of the act!” Lyney lets out a laugh.

“Ours is more of an experiment you see, just testing something. We’ve made some modifications to the primordial water so it can be part of the act, we won’t know if the person will come back or not but we need someone to test it on.” The guy looks between you and Lyney and smiles again.

Wriothesley stares at the file of missing people reports on his desk while Sigewinne was busy decorating his iron fist in stickers.

Five people have gone missing in the past week. Ever since the trial of the primordial sea water the cases have gone up and finding the culprit has been harder than ever.

It’s an organization in the works. Who is involved remains a mystery to many. Wriothesly and his officers have been working non stop only to be back to square one.

He needs to put an end to this madness, he hasn’t been able to rest properly every time he leaves you he thinks the worst.

The sound of running down the hall makes Wriothesley tear his eyes from the file to glance up.

An officer and a familiar looking young girl run in the office breathless.

“Lynett? What’s wrong?” Wriothesly sits up straighter, looking at the young girl whose face looks paler than he’s ever seen, she looks scared.

“Sir Wriothesley we have a problem.” His subordinate speaks up and Wriothesley holds his breath.

Another missing person? Did they find the culprit? He thinks a thousand thoughts per second.

“I-It’s about my brother and y/n, t-they’ve been taken hostage.” Lynett stutters, her eyes blown wide.

Wriothesly stops, his thoughts, his breathing, his heart.

“Sir, they are being held hostage at the place they always practice, Lady Lynette came here and explained how she was walking back to the house with lunch and saw signs of struggle and men she didn’t recognize in the building that she didn’t recognize before she entered so she came straight here.” The officer beside her explains.

The room grows colder in seconds, making Sigewinne jump off her chair, rushing to Wriothesley’s side.

“Wriothesley it’s cold, don’t lose your temper.” The small girl whispers, making his jaw clench uncomfortably. He knows he can’t act out in front of them; it'll only make things worse.

“Call backup to the location asap, surround the building and make sure no one acts until I get there understand?” He grits through his teeth, fists clenching on the table as he takes a deep breath through his nose.

This morning, just this morning he warned you and this happens? But why? How? It’s has to be a setup if anything.

The one thing he’s been fearing, what’s been keeping him up at night has happened.

“You see I chose you two specifically, the famous magician of Fontaine won't it be fascinating for you to be the one on the other end this time? For you to do your part and see where you send people that you make disappear?” His smile on the man’s face is almost terrifying by how wide it’s become, his eyes hold no emotion as he explains to Lynney.

“That’s not how it works, I don’t actually-“

“And you…” the man cuts off Lynney, shifting his attention to you. “Your boyfriend has been making things oh so hard on us lately you know? If he wants to find us so badly, wants the details on what exactly we’re doing, no better person to show him with than you, I’ll give him a real life example on what exactly we’ve been planning.” His hands clap together and you feel sick again.

Promise me, please?

Wriothesly’s voice rings in your head, you can't leave him like this.

“No, I'm sorry but Lynney and I can't be a part of this.” you explain, seeing the man in front of you stop smiling instantly.

“This water only works on Fontaine natives right?” you clear your throat looking at Lynney, he only nods his head, already knowing what you're about to say. “Well you see, Lynney and I are both not from here, we were not born he-”

“NONSENSE!” the man screams standing up making you back away. “Don't play that card with me, both of you are-”

“They're not playing any cards, it's true.” Lyney plays along with your plan, shuffling in front of you.

“What you're saying is true?” the man turns around, walking behind him to one of his other men.

The man he walks to brings up a small briefcase and the older man opens it swiftly, laughing when he looks inside.

“Then prove your case, yeah?” he turns back to the two of you, a small vial with clear liquid inside.

You feel chills run down your spine, seeing lyney’s figure shuffle in front of you wide eyes turning to look back at you.

“Don't panic, ok? I won't let him touch you, I promised Wriothesley when you agreed to be a part of my show, he talked to me for hours making sure I ensured your safety." Lyney whispers and you feel your eyes burn.

“L-Lyney I can't let him pour that on you.” you whisper, hands moving to pull him back so he can be behind you.

You tug his arm back but he doesn't budge much.

“Who should I test it on first?” The strange man walks back to the two of you.

“You young man, or….” He looks over at you and his smile widens. “You.”

“You’re not going near them-“

A soft knock at the door makes the three of you look in the direction the door is at, everyone in the room goes quiet.

“Don’t move.” The man points at the two of you and turns around. “Hold this.” He tells the man that brought him the briefcase.

“Sir Lyney, come with me.” He reaches for him and grabs his arm, you hold onto his other.

“I don���t have time for this, let him go.” Tha man threatens you and you feel Lyney wiggle his arm.

“Hey, I’ll be alright ok? Just listen to him please.” He says calmly, giving you an assuring look.

You reluctantly let his arm go and the man walks Lyney to the door.

“Answer them.” The man pushes lyney forward.

“Hello, who’s there?” Lyney calls out.

“Brother it’s me, the door was locked, why is that?” Lynette answers and your heart sinks, she’s going to be dragged in this too now.

“Oh Lynette sorry….” Lyney looks back at the man and pauses.

“Bring her in, she’ll be useful for this too.” The man says untying the binds around his wrists.

The sound of the bolts unlocking was the only thing heard, you couldn’t see her, you were sitting behind the door.

Lyney hesitates but opens the door wider stepping to the side, his eyes averting to his side where you were behind the door and back to the open door.

The man behind the door looks at Lyney confused, why was he just standing there? Why wasn’t Lynette coming in?

“Come on in.” Lyney bows.

You watch in confusion as he does so, why is he welcoming Lynette into here like that.

Though, Lynette doesn’t walk through the door.

As Lyney steps to the side, the door is shoved open a bit wider and a head of scruffy black and silver hair is the first thing you see peek in.

You hear your heart beating in your ears, everything goes quiet then his eyes land on you.

His face visibly softens as he sees you awake. There.

“Hey, what’s going-“

In seconds a loud crack was heard and the man behind the door went flying past where you were sitting. Wriothesley’s iron fist dematerializing when the man behind the door foot the wall behind you.

The other man holding the briefcase runs to the man on the floor.

Then the officers rush in seconds after, the men behind you getting put in cuffs.

You feel the tension on your shoulders and fists loosen, feeling all the tension melt away just from looking at the man who came to your rescue.

Seeing Wriothesly felt almost unreal.

He wastes no time, long legs walking to you and kneeling down in seconds.

His hand brushes your hair out of your face seeing blood run down from your temple he immediately reaches into his pocket pulling out his handkerchief.

You only look at him, feeling your lips wobble with how tender he was being. How soft his hands felt against your skin.

“What did they do to you?” His voice is barely above whisper, he feels his throat all scratchy and he can’t stand it how bruised you look.

He wants to make the one who made you bleed pay.

“They didn’t touch me while I was-“

“You're bleeding, you have an open wound on the side of your head, you can’t tell me that.” His hands gently tilt your face up a bit to look at him. “You got hurt, what would’ve happened if I didn’t arrive this-“

You feel the tremble in his hands, the look in his eyes as he looks at you makes your heart ache and eyes burn even more.

You lean forward, your head hitting his chest as your binded hands reach for his shirt. You need to hold him, feel him there.

“I'm sorry Wrio, I don't remember them hitting me but I promise from the moment I woke up until you got here, I didn't let them touch me.” you grip his shirt, breathing in his familiar scent as you feel his arms wrap around your shoulders, bringing you into him.

He knows he can't even be mad at you, you didn't plan this, and as mad as he is a Lyney he knows he wouldn't put you in this situation either.

“You…Just who do you think you are, you've been meddling in my business for far too long, you're the one I need to get rid of.” you pull back when you hear the voice coming from behind Wriothesley.

The same man who was just thrown across the room by Wriothesley minutes ago was standing crookedly a few feet behind him, the same vial from earlier in his hold

You feel time slow down when you see him take the top off, everyone started to move at the same time.

He was going to throw the water all over Wriothesley.

He was going to pour the water on him and make him disappear.

Wriostesly was going to disappear.

You push yourself back from Wriothesley and see his face drop into one of realization and horror.

From the corner of your eye you see Lynes' silhouette coming closer but you don't hesitate. You can't.

The man throws the water in Wriostesley's direction and everything goes quiet once again, your legs move then the noise comes back.

Different voices calling out to you but then you feel it, the feeling of water making contact with your skin.

Wriosthesly stumbles on his feet, he was so close to pulling you back, what did you do?

Everyone stills, waiting for the worst to happen.

Some look away. Lynette and some other officers cover their eyes but Wriostelsy waits, holds his breath, he can't take his eyes off you.

But it never happens, you don't disappear like the man in court.

“What is this?! Why aren't you disappearing-” Before the man could finish talking Lyney had snuck up from behind him and knocked him out cold before he could make another move.

It’s just like you told the man earlier, you weren't a native of fontaine. The only thing is no one else here besides Lyney knows that.

‘Y-Y/n?” Wriothesley steps forward, confused and shocked.

“I'm sorry I never told you Wrio, I'm not from Fontaine. The water has no effects on me as it does to you, I couldn't let it touch you, no I couldn't take the chances.” You turn back to him, head hanging low. It's not that you didn't trust him with this information. Your past before you met Wriothesley isn't one you're fond of; you couldn't tell him but now he needs to know.

You can't bring yourself to look at him because you're afraid of what he'd say, would he look at you differently now?

You hear footsteps approaching you and back up.

“N-No please, you can't. I'm drenched in water i don't want to take the chances of you getting-’

Wriostesly doesn't listen, he can't. Not after you've gone and done something like that.

He grabs your wrist and pulls you towards him, not caring about the water residue on your skin one bit. He pulls you impossibly closer to him and holds you not caring about him in a room full of his fellow officers and acquaintances because you kept your word. You put up a fight against it all.

You freeze for a second but feel your bottom lip start to wobble as it all comes crashing down on you. He's not mad. After all the fear you’ve felt the thought of letting him know scared you but that's the last thing he cared about.

Since Wriostesly met you he always knew there was something about you, more to you than what you put on the surface. He was always interested in you and was attracted to your kind heart though in his opinion you're too kind, even to those who dont deserve it. Throughout the time he started getting to know you he had always wanted to ask about your past since you’ve never brought it up but he soon started to forget about it as time went on.

He ended up forgetting to ask because he fell in love with you in the present, the you now and he knows. You don't talk about it for a reason, he won't pressure you, even now, with you in his arms after admitting some part of it he won't pry. The you now, the you here in his arms is what he cares about most, when you're ready to tell him he’ll listen but for now, he'll hold you for as long as he wants because you fought for not only yourself but for him as-well.

_______________

author’s note: hello lovelies!! \(≧▽≦)/<3 ITS BEEN SO LONG T^T ohmygosh im so sorry for not posting for so long but i just had to stop for a while, things got busy and i was writing but wasn’t satisfied enough to post BUT im back with a oneshot im happy to share :D one for….SIR WRIOSTHESLEY HE SO AHHHH im so excited to share this one, ever since I finished the Fontaine archon quest this has been sitting in my mind SPECIFICALLY for wriothesley hehe. anyways i hope you have all been well! I’ve missed you all dearly but i hope you’re all taking care, eating well and drinking water im glad to be back mwahhh enjoy!! ^~^<3 (also this isn’t proof read so apologies for any errors!!)

[strongheartneteyam]

I wet you like water but she stained you like blood.

Pairing: widowed!dilf!jake sully x younger!female!human!reader

CW: slight sexual language, can be triggering to some, heartbreak, age gap kink, hurt/no comfort, age gap relationship problems, angst, reader reminiscing (pls tell me if I missed anything) 

So, yeah... I never know when I'm gonna come back with another writing. My hiatus n working periods are all a bit unpredictable lol sorry. Anyways... I literally spent the whole night awake n I was struck by a sudden lightning of creativity early in the morning and I edited this chapter n wrote a bit more, but I still haven't slept at all, so, I apologize if some parts of this make no sense at all. I'll fix it when I can. Hope you guys like it <3 ily guys a whole lot :)) obs: this chapter is a shorter one.

Slightly proofread.

Chapter 4 𓆩♡𓆪

They say all's well that ends well

But I'm in a new hell every time you double-cross my mind

You said if we had been closer in age maybe it would've been fine

And that made me want to die

The idea you had of me, who was she?

A never-needy, ever-lovely jewel whose shine reflects on you

All Too Well - 10 minutes Version (Taylor Swift)

𓆩♡𓆪

It had been 1 year since the last time you saw Jacob Sully. Or Jakey, like you used to call him. The wound never healed. It still throbbed and bled every time you remembered the words he told you that dreadful day. "I think we should stop seeing each other." It felt like you would never get over him. How can one get over such an overpowering, raw feeling? He marked you forever, like a bruise that seemed to never disappear from your skin.

The flashback came like thunder in a storm, haunting your thoughts with a loud pain that echoed through your mind. What you told Jake that night.

“The truth is I love you. The truth is I can't take this anymore. I'm giving you my everything but you don't seem to be doing the same. You're still guarded.” There was a tense period of silence “Jake… I love you. But I don't think you feel the same.”

Maybe you shouldn't have said anything. Maybe if you had kept your mouth shut, he would still be with you.

Ugh!! Stop that, now, (y/n)! Some self love, please? You're better than this. You deserve better.

You tried to convince yourself of that, at least.

The pain was unbearable at times and almost easy to conceal at other times. It depended on how distracted with work or your studies you were. These days you ran to any distraction that could ease the perpetual angst that squeezed your heart inside its hands all the fucking time. It had been like that ever since Jake left you. What were you expecting anyway? You should have known you were never truly loved by Jake. The love of his life was Neytiri and it would always be, alive and walking through Pandora or dead and with Eywa.

It felt beyond weird to have to hear people talking about Jake and have to pretend he was a stranger to you, someone you barely knew, when he had actually left a mark so strong on you, a memory ingrained in your brain, a feeling, a pain buried inside your heart that made you want to scream and hit your head against a wall. That's how much it hurt.

You would never have his body against yours again, warming you up when it was cold, after you spent the whole day in that damn lab, studying Pandoran plants but all you could really concentrate on was how much you missed his reassuring, protective presence. He made you feel safe for the first time in your life. But now he is gone. Just like every single good thing you ever had in your life. But you know what? Maybe your mother was right, maybe love wasn't really something that could ever last forever.

Did Jake ever really make a real effort to be with you? Thinking back, it was extremely easy for him to just come to you and fuck you anytime he felt sad and lonely. What if you had just been a naive, dumb girl all this time? Were you mourning a love that never actually existed? It was always so hard to talk to him about his feelings for you, he never actually let you in, to be honest. All the time you two spent together, you were never able to know if he ever saw you as a partner or just a fuck buddy. 

Oh, but the high… it was worth all the lows. The butterflies in your stomach every time you guys were almost caught fucking in the back of your work room by Norm. Eventually you guys had to tell him about your situationship because, oh well… he already knew what was going on, really. Norm is not a fool or a child. He could add 2 plus 2.

The adrenaline was worth all the tears. And, fuck… you would do it all over again in a heartbeat.

𓆩♡𓆪

Taglist:

@aonungsoneandonly

@coldbabyheroin

@fairyyrosee

@myh3artttt

@explosiongamora

@ufiy

@yeosxxx

@happyyappysworld

@avatar4eva

@henhouse-horrors

@jakesullyfatjuicypeen

@fujimoribaby

@layla2-49

@zoetrope1997

@yeosxxx

@luvv4j4ybe11

@bakugouswaif

@slytherdor01

[cafeleningrad]

No, I don't think that RGU "subverts fairy tale narratives". On the contrary. I don't know how intentional the writing was on the writer's part but RGU's themes, structure, and resolution are much closer aligned to the Grimm-fashion fairy tales than the manicured opening sequence might make the viewer believe. At some points they do conciously reference fairy tales whilst alos having a good grasp on it's story contents. In fact, the opening sequence is less accurate about fairy tales than the actual plot of RGU.

Anyhow, actually a quick rambling how many fairy tale motives are in Utena. some referenced to, some overtly named, some just by my personal associciation:

The only fairy tale where the story is actually changed is Sleeping Beauty. There the visual reference is extremely strong with the duel plattform (a tower) being hidden in a forbidden forest, surrounded by thorns and roses, a princess waiting/sleeping (in her coffin) on a bed of roses. But unlike in the tale, the princess isn't woken up by the whimse of the prince but is allowed to choose if she even wants to wake up. [By the way, here's an essay comparing the pschycological literary interpretation of (The contemporary reading of) Sleeping Beauty with RGU.]

On the theme of girl locked away in a tower: Rapunzel come to my mind. Indeed Rapunzel loves her prince but he's also her co-conspirator as well as mean to escape her captivity. Their scheming is interrupted, both get horribly injured while attempting to escape. They both wnader around for a long time until their finally find each other. Scarred, they still are deeply happy to have found each other once more.

One OST track is titled "Bluebeard's castle". So fitting to be played in Akio's tower. The titular Bluebeard appears at first charming. Yet his bride discovers his secret chamber of previously killed women, relaizing what a monster her once so enarmoured husband is. It's a fairy tale beginning with a slight snese of unease, building up dread the longer the bride resides in the castle. What a perfect association for Akio's facade and body count of abuse.

The next Bluebeard in the making, Touga explicitly compares Utena with "the golden Goose"; In which every one tries to rip out the bird's golden feathers, creating a gigantic queue of greed. Even though Touga most likely wants to compare Utena to something precious worth exploiting, his comparison misses how the goose's doing finally made a princess laugh, and none actually was able to rip out the precious gold feathers.

Speaking of animals... In an conversation during which Nanami has a hard time naming her ever growing distress towards Touga's and her relationships, one statue in the background switches in the form of the "Musicians of Bremen". Nanami carriesway more animal associations than even Anthy. In fact Nanami turning into a cow is her being treated as domestic labour animal. In "The musicians of Bremen", labour animals are to be slaughtered after they can't labour anymore. So they flee their circumstances, band together (heh), and find a new home as band of misfits. Whereas the statue is a string of visual warnings about Nanami's dangerous situation, it gives me hope, that Nanami might, like the Bremen musicians, escape to a not glamorous but future full of support and friendship.

Last association coming to my mind. This is an entire free-falls association but with so many Utena-Nanami-paralles, why not make an animal comparison, too? Utena reminds me so much of the "Puss in Boots". Not destined to be anything but a cat, anything but a girl, she puts on clothing that shoul dnot be hers. It suits her quiet well. Yet the puss does it's deeds to help out their master who gave her the boots. They trick an evil magician with nothing but cleverness and ligt up their master into fortune. Utena doesn't help out of thanksfulness yet, like the cat, she does act out of care and adoration for the rose bride, and triumphs over a sinister figure that seemed once so overly powerful. LIke the wizard turning himself into a mouse, Akio turns out to not be overly powerful but actually a scared manchild who refuses to grow up, and actually isn't the allmighty figure he paints himself to be.

[Bonus: Saionji as the frog prince. Very serious analysis. Even though the popular image is one of a princess kissing a frog, and him turning into a prince, the actual tale is... not so gentle. The frog asks the princess to take hiom with her, in return to giving her back the ball that actually belongs to her. The princess feels humiliated having to play-act a romantic dinner scene at the frog's demands to sit on her side and be fed. Her protests are overruled by her father reprimanding her to hold her promise towards the frog. (Anthy mentioning how Akio is more like her father to her.) But the princess has her fill with the impertinent frog, throws him against a wall, and there: He becomes a prince. The parallels between Saionji getting beat up like a punching bag until he finally chills (somewhat) down are almost too obvious. Also, the frog and him share the colour green.]

In general, fairy tales often feature disempowered protagonists, often young women, most of the time they aren't even royalty. The protagonists often survive the most dire consequences by cleverness, resourcefulness but also their kindness to strangers - not raw power or powerful magic. I've no idea why people claim that retellings are "dark", "misbehaving", or "adult" because not only is it inaccurate to whom fairy tales were told, but even in format of children's publications, fairy tales are incredibly dark already. Children's fears of abusive parents, being neglected, mistrateatment, poverty, the world being scary being forsaken by mistakes by those who were supposed to care for the child, domestic violence, even incestuous abuse do feature in fairy tales - however, the protagonists survive the most dire of straits. Even if hurt in the process, they surivive, and "lived happily ever aftere". It's a faint, promise that they found happiness anyway. How similar it rings with "someday we will shine". If these common elements don't ressemble Utena's journey, and the circumstances of her friends, i don't know what else would bear a stronger ressemblance.

Apart from Anthy's and Akio's vague connection to godhood, and allegory, none of the kinds is special. Utena is a classic fairy tale orphan child, no special parentage, only her role as protagonist follows her fending off the darkness around her.

[wannaeatramyeon]

Seong Taehoon x Reader: Hansu & Taehoon talk

Before you come back to the studio. Follow up to this one for @razypie. Some Hansu crumbs specially for you 🫶

"When did you and Y/N start dating?"

Taehoons stumbles on his kick, almost missing the sandbag entirely. Regaining his composure, he whirls round on his dad.

"What the hell are you on about, old man?"

Hansu sighs, taking his glasses off and wiping them. Taehoon is in one of those moods is he? Honestly, why is he such a brat. Hansu doesn't remember being such a delinquent in his youth. Must have gotten it from his mother's side.

Patience patience, Hansu is the adult. He needs to gently guide his son. "She's a nice girl, Taehoon. Don't mess around with her."

Taehoon throws his arms out in exasperation, face scowling and defensive. The hell? "I'm not even doing anything!"

"I've seen the way you both flirt when you should be training."

Ok, that claim is all lies and slander. If there is one thing that Taehoon takes seriously, it's Taekwondo. "What the fuck, dad?"

"You're just a very hands on instructor, that's all."

Hands on?! Are you kidding. Taehoon is nothing if not a professional. Well, professional might be stretching it a bit but.

Fuck. His ears redden. Has he been that obvious that even his goddamn dad is lecturing him. So transparent that Hansu saw through his feelings weeks before he could even come to terms with it?

Taehoon crosses his arms tightly, shoulders creeping up to his ears in mortification. He will not look at his dad. He cannot.

Hansu ploughs on, glasses glinting deviously in the light, "And how often you go around to her place."

"You told me to!"

"I mentioned it. And only the first time."

The tips of Taehoon's ear are burning a furious crimson.

"You're there almost every day."

Taehoon can't bear this anymore. He takes to the sandbag again as a form of distraction. If he hits it hard enough, loud enough, he can drown the old man out.

"All the snacks in our house are missing." WHACK!

"I'm pretty sure you didn't eat it all on your own." WHACK!

"You took the last of our kimchi the other week." WHACK!

"And my lunch the other day for Y/N." WHACK!

"She clearly likes you too." WHACK!

"I think she liked you even before she met you." WHACK!

Taehoon outwardly grumbles at this, his kicks landing quicker and quicker. Inside though? Preening like a peacock.

"Though it took some warming up again when she did meet you but-"

"Shut. It." Taehoon spits out, followed by an effortless 1080 kick.

"I'm serious, son. Don't let that one go." WHACK! "I like her."

Oh.

Taehoon stills in his movement.

That makes two of them.

Like a little kid, confessing to his dad that he was the one that stole the last cookie and broke the jar too, Taehoon mumbles, "...I like her too."

Hansu looks on at his son in pride, "Good."

Finally.

Someone to keep his delinquent son in line. Someone on Hansu's side. Someone kind and understanding. That Taehoon can talk to, share his secrets and feelings and worries that he never could to his old man. To help Taehoon-

Suddenly, the cold grip of fear inches its way around Hansu's heart. "Taehoon?"

Taehoon turns around at this, already dreading whatever comes out of his mouth next. This conversation is nothing short of torture.

"I'm too young to be a grandpa."

"DAD!"

[iwillnotdieamonster]

"This is a beautiful letter from Fiona Apple explaining to her fans why she must postpone a concert date. I am impressed at the way she was instantly able to make the decision to choose love over her career. Indeed, the world needs more of this.

It's 6pm on Friday, and I'm writing to a few thousand friends I have not met yet. I'm writing to ask them to change our plans and meet a little while later.

Here's the thing.

I have a dog, Janet, and she's been ill for about 2 years now, as a tumor has been idling in her chest, growing ever so slowly. She's almost 14 years old now. I got her when she was 4 months old. I was 21 then — an adult, officially — and she was my kid.

She is a pitbull, and was found in Echo Park, with a rope around her neck, and bites all over her ears and face.

She was the one the dogfighters use to puff up the confidence of the contenders.

She's almost 14 and I've never seen her start a fight, or bite, or even growl, so I can understand why they chose her for that awful role. She's a pacifist.

Janet has been the most consistent relationship of my adult life, and that is just a fact. We've lived in numerous houses, and joined a few makeshift families, but it's always really been just the two of us.

She slept in bed with me, her head on the pillow, and she accepted my hysterical, tearful face into her chest, with her paws around me, every time I was heartbroken, or spirit-broken, or just lost, and as years went by, she let me take the role of her child, as I fell asleep, with her chin resting above my head.

She was under the piano when I wrote songs, barked any time I tried to record anything, and she was in the studio with me, all the time we recorded the last album.

The last time I came back from tour, she was spry as ever, and she's used to me being gone for a few weeks, every 6 or 7 years.

She has Addison's Disease, which makes it more dangerous for her to travel, since she needs regular injections of Cortisol, because she reacts to stress and excitement without the physiological tools which keep most of us from literally panicking to death.

Despite all this, she's effortlessly joyful & playful, and only stopped acting like a puppy about 3 years ago. She is my best friend, and my mother, and my daughter, my benefactor, and she's the one who taught me what love is.

I can't come to South America. Not now. When I got back from the last leg of the US tour, there was a big, big difference.

She doesn't even want to go for walks anymore.

I know that she's not sad about aging or dying. Animals have a survival instinct, but a sense of mortality and vanity, they do not. That's why they are so much more present than people.

But I know she is coming close to the time where she will stop being a dog, and start instead to be part of everything. She'll be in the wind, and in the soil, and the snow, and in me, wherever I go.

I just can't leave her now, please understand. If I go away again, I'm afraid she'll die and I won't have the honor of singing her to sleep, of escorting her out.

Sometimes it takes me 20 minutes just to decide what socks to wear to bed.

But this decision is instant.

These are the choices we make, which define us. I will not be the woman who puts her career ahead of love & friendship.

I am the woman who stays home, baking Tilapia for my dearest, oldest friend. And helps her be comfortable & comforted & safe & important.

Many of us these days, we dread the death of a loved one. It is the ugly truth of Life that keeps us feeling terrified & alone. I wish we could also appreciate the time that lies right beside the end of time. I know that I will feel the most overwhelming knowledge of her, and of her life and of my love for her, in the last moments.

I need to do my damnedest, to be there for that.

Because it will be the most beautiful, the most intense, the most enriching experience of life I've ever known.

When she dies.

So I am staying home, and I am listening to her snore and wheeze, and I am revelling in the swampiest, most awful breath that ever emanated from an angel. And I'm asking for your blessing.

I'll be seeing you.

Love,

Fiona"

Credit goes to the respective owners.

[spacelessbian]

thoughts on Agatha All Along FINALE

Full spoilers ahead, 100% don't read if you haven't seen episodes 8 and 9.

I really enjoyed the finale, both episodes had a lot to offer and overall I am quite happy with how the show concluded. Things that I liked in no particular order:

The REVEALS. There is simply nothing better than a reveal that recontextualizes everything. And we didn't get just one, but two! Personally I found Agatha running a con and murdering women for centuries the more fun one, but Billy actually creating the Road was also really good and even though I've only seen the show once (unlike many people on here, no doubt), I can name many points in the story and in the dialogue where this is worked in and suddenly makes sense. Really great stuff.

Agatha and Nicky. I was dreading this part a little bit because I know Nicholas Scratch is some sort of big name in Marvel comics and I truly couldn't care less, so I'm pleased with what we got – a genuinely sweet yet tragic story of a mom and her son, destined to death even before being born. I was surprised (but in a good way) by Agatha's quiet reaction to Nicky's death because we know his death hurt her badly, but that's just how it is sometimes.

Agatha and Rio. I won't say I'd always had fate in Marvel to not mess this up, so yay! I don't think they did. This relationship is the heart of the show (and it is black and beats for the queers) and I think the writers did it justice (apart from one thing which I will get to in the next section). The kiss was intense, sexy, beautiful and also tragic and both Kathryn Hahn and Aubrey Plaza did a fantastic job with every piece of dialogue and every expression. I want them to play doomed lovers in five more projects, at least.

The coven. I already blogged about Jen but man, is it funny. Even this was Agatha all along, but she is such a menace she hasn't even realized that. I'm truly happy for Jen making it through and getting her power back. I'm glad we saw Alice's last moment and I liked how much Billy cared about her, Lilia and Sharon.

Agatha's death. I can't help myself, I need to go to that moment again. I was destroyed by that. It was so beautiful, both thematically and also visually and all. The flowers and mushrooms? The sun coming up? I kept thinking about Hozier's Work Song: When my time comes around, lay me gently in the cold dark earth. No grave can hold my body down. I'll crawl home to her. (whadup, Rio reference)

Agatha and Billy specifically in that last battle scene. She was blue you guys, she was just completely blue and in the exact same blue that Billy wears in his silly Marvel costume. And Billy just offered her his power, without questions and without wanting anything in return! And she didn't kill him! (Writing that down, the bar is on the floor for Agatha lol.)

There are other small things (like the Subaru lol), but I am ready to go to the bad section now. Two things I did not like (hidden for lenght but also because not everyone wants to read negative stuff):

Agatha's ghost. I'm gonna say it. Agatha as a ghost looks fucking terrible and her existence itself diminishes her death scene. I do understand why they did it and even why she looks like that (Agatha in the comics, as I understand it, is Wanda's mentor and also an older white haired lady, so they wanted to keep that but it didn't make sense with Wanda anymore), but I just hate it. Especially the wig.

The Marvel stuff. Yes, I realize this sounds stupid, it is a Marvel show after all. We wouldn't get a stupid gimmick like ghost Agatha joining Billy to look for his brother if this wasn't a starting point for the Wiccan. And I like Billy, I do, I also (obviously) love Agatha, who was first introduced in WandaVision (I realize the hypocrisy), but it just doesn't work for me. I would rather think about the beautiful death scene with it's poetic tragedy than about white haired Agatha floating on a washing machine, I'm sorry.

That being said, I really really liked the whole show and I am happy to say I hooked in my best friend (if you are reading this, you are contractually obliged to like the post, you know how it is) and that I actually know other people irl who watched it and enjoyed it. I'm sad it's over and even sadder that in this day and age, noone will talk about it in about two to three weeks. Anyway, it was lovely.

[dumbass-tumbler-cryptid]

Ahh I can't wait for Avatar 3! I know it probably won't happen but I would like to see Spider join the ranks of Ash's na'vi either through re-kidnapping or willingly as some kind of inside spy or ambassador for the good guys (kind of like Clarke from the 100 if you know this show). And while I'm not a fan of the idea of ​​Quaricth being romantically involved with Varang I think it would be funny to see her and Spider together since she would basically become his stepmother

I loved the idea of ash clan Spider and was having so much fun with the ideas you listed until the theories based off the D23 pic started being talked about. My friend @cyren-myadd has some great thoughts on everything and I’m also a big fan of Avatar Theory on YouTube. I was watching his break down of the Ash Clan last night and he noted that the other Na’vi in the picture with Varang don’t seem to have kurus hinting that they might cut them off and give them to Varang as a sign of loyalty. If that actually happens then that is so insane to me. This isn’t just a tribe of out casts, it’s a cult.

In the original Avatar there’s actually a deleted scene of Tsu’tey, who survives his fall, though is still very injured. He’s found by Wainfleet who says that he heard having their kurus cut off is worse then death for a Na’vi and then proceeds to cut off Tsu’tey’s. When Tsu’tey is found he makes Jake the next leader and then begs him for death which Jake gives him. I think knowing all that is what makes the idea of Na’vi willing cutting off their kurus so off putting to me. It’s not only severing their connection to Eywa, but to every loved one they could connect with, every creature they could bond with. And it’s all for Varang. That is beyond scary for me and so I don’t want my boy anywhere near that crazy cult although I know he will be.

I’m pretty certain from the set leaks we’ve gotten that at least Spider and Jake will be captured by Quaritch. So yeah Spider will definitely meet the ash clan through re-kidnapping. But I don’t think he’ll stay with them for long. The ash clan is obviously working with the R.D.A.

 We see in this image that the background ash clan are all heavily armed. They’d only get that kind of firepower from the R.D.A. My guess is that Varang wants to be all powerful and spread her cult to all the tribes. She probably doesn’t care about the great balance if her followers cut off their kurus and so she makes a deal. For their firepower Varang will let the R.D.A strip Pandora for resources.

From script and art leaks we know that a miracle will take place where Spider will be able to breath Pandoran air and possibly from the art leak have a kuru of his own.

This image has been kicking around for a while now and you can see Spider has a braid like a kuru but I’m thinking that might actually be his kuru. Now hear me out because my evidence is very tenuous for this but you see how Spider’s hair is significantly darker at the roots. Like their Jack Champions real hair color. Could just be attention to detail since some blonds do change to brunettes as the age or it could be because we’re going to lose the wig I.e all our angst fics come true and we actually do see Spider get his dreads cut off.

(Which even though I’ve written that scenario a few times I legitimately don’t want to see it happen just because I don’t want to see our boy in anymore pain)

And the only way I really see that happening is if he’s captured (like we know he will be) and experimented on by the R.D.A. They’d most definitely want to see how his kuru attaches to his brain and you can’t perform brain surgery on a patient with a full head of hair. Quaritch wouldn’t be able to just stand by and let this happen though. He cares about his son for sure but also he’s indebted to Spider for saving his life. I can see a moment mirroring the one on the rocks where Spider left Quaritch after saving him, though this time it’s Spider who was saved. Spider would be seeing his dad’s potential for change and want him to come with him but Quaritch refuses this time. He’s all out of sorts because he’s seen how crazy Varang is and has no desire to return to the ash clan but he also can’t go back to the R.D.A now that he’s betrayed them. So he just says “now we’re even,” hops onto Cupcake and flies away leaving Spider to return to Jake.

Those are all just theories though. I’m just as excited as you for Fire and Ash! Everything from D23 had me pricing out how much a weekend trip to Animal Kingdom would cost me just so I could go to the world of Pandora there. I think I’ll cry happy tears the day I finally have enough money to go and bask in the world I love so much.

Thank you so much for reaching out! 💞💞

[dragon-creates]

Five Times Jax and Pomni Share Dreams of Their Past Lives (And One Time Where They Remember)

Read on AO3

Read Part 2 Here

1/2/3/4/5/6

Jax and Pomni know that they can’t actually dream in this digital world, nor can they remember who they were before coming here. But after retiring to their sleeping quarters each night, they begin to have dreams of people who they have never seen before, not the circus themed cast of characters within this realm, but real people! Why do they seem do real? Why do these dreams feel more like memories? And why do these people remind them so much of each other?

I can't believe how much the silly circus show won me over, and how much brainrot these two have given me. I won't update for I while as I have other wips for different fandoms I'm working on but I wanted to get the first chapter up to help motivate me. Anyways I hope you like this and check out the rest of my tumblr to see what I get up to.

Also yes the chapter titles are Taylor Swift songs because I'm weak.

Fearless

The air was crisp and cool, though not to the point where people were shivering in their costumes, neon lights were in every corner anyone could see, flashing the paths with pinks, purples and green, different stalls and rides were up, ranging from candy apples and sweets stand to rollercoasters and Ferris wheels and every single person were dressed as either monsters, characters or whatever their imaginations would come up with. Truly, the festival had set the perfect atmosphere for Halloween…well, everyone except for Penny.

She was a short young woman, 23 years of age with long dark hair that reached her waste and curtain bangs along her forehead, with pale skin and a bony structure (she hated that part about herself).

It wasn’t that she was forced to come here – she had heartily accepted when her sister Riley and her girlfriend Winter asked – but now that she was here, she wasn’t so sure anymore. Penny wasn’t really the bravest person around, she flinched at the slightest sound, she dreaded talking to new people who would come her way and had relied on her older sister to help her out for most of her life, but that didn’t mean that she wasn’t trying to overcome any of it. After all it wasn’t like she could control her anxiety, it was something she struggled with ever since she was little. But tonight, she wanted to prove that she was able to enjoy Halloween outside the comfort of handing out candy to trick-or-treaters from the safety of her home. So far, she really did like it, she had fun buying sweets and going on rollercoasters, and though it could be overbearing and loud sometimes, Riley and Winter would take her to a nearby café to help Penny catch her breath before doing something else.

However, this was part of the night that she both desperately wanted and dreaded doing…the haunted funhouse. She knew what was in there, jump scares, clowns and nightmares to last for the next few nights to come, but she didn’t want to miss out, now when she heard about how much fun people have had in there. She just wanted to prove that she wasn’t this scared little nobody, that she was a person who wanted to have fun like everyone else, to enjoy the things that everyone else had fun with. So here she was, dressed in a hastily sewn purple rabbit onesie of her own making (she had made it in a time crunch when learning about the festival) into a terrifying funhouse that deep down, where she wasn’t lying to herself, she did not want to go in.

“Penny no,” she turned to see Riley, holding Winter’s hand as the other girl was texting someone on her phone, “You know what your anxiety’s like, you don’t have to go in there.”

Riley had quite a lean build with noticeable muscle on her arms, she had shoulder length dark red hair, brown eyes and pale skin. She was four years older than Penny, and while she did seem a bit intimidating, she was always soft and protective over her younger sister.

“He’s still not answering,” Winter murmured, shaking her head, “He was supposed to meet us an hour ago.” Winter was slightly taller than Riley, with dark black hair and eyes with a tanned complexion. The two women were dressed in a couple’s costume, Riley as Poison Ivy and Winter as Harley Quinn, they were also supposed to meet with Winter’s friend, but the mystery person still hadn’t shown up yet.

“Maybe he’ll show up while I’m in the funhouse?” Penny suggested as Riley sighed, “I’ll be quick in there, if I run then I’ll have less time to acknowledge the bad stuff in there!”

“Penny, I know you and I know that if you go in there, you’re gonna have a panic attack,” Riley took her little sister’s hand, offering her a pleading gaze, “Please just stay out here with us and we’ll meet up with Winter’s friend. We could go on the rollercoaster again; I know you really enjoyed that one.”

Penny smiled fainty, Riley looking out for her wasn’t anything new, but she didn’t want her sister to be burdened with her. It wasn’t right, Riley deserved to live her life, have fun with Winter and not worry about her scaredy-cat sister all the time, she deserved better than that.

When Riley turned to face Winter again, Penny pulled her hand out of her sister’s and ran into the funhouse, ignoring Riley calling her name the deeper she went in.

She took a few more deep breaths, she was doing! She was doing it and oh…oh she fucked up. There were multiple paintings of disfigured clowns peering down at her from the halls, the eerie sounds of deranged crying and laughing made her hairs stand on end, there were paths twisting and turning as they reminded her that she could get lost in this dreadful house and mirrors that not only showed her in different shapes and sizes, but also her terrified expression. Riley was right, this was too much for her, she didn’t even want to come in here in the first place why did she do this?!

A crazed laugh made her jump, looking carefully over her shoulder, she noticed a tall jester from down the hall, his yellow suit stained with red, and his mask had a twisted smile, hiding dark secrets that she didn’t want to find out. With a scream, she tore off down the hall, the jester chasing after her. She knew that were going to be actors, trained with scaring the guests, but it didn’t mean that she liked it! She really, really shouldn’t have come in here.

She skidded to a stop when she came to a dead end, her back pressing to the wall as the jester came closer and closer to her. She bit back a fearful yelp as he slammed a hand next to her head, peering down at her. She took a few more breaths, trying to keep calm. This isn’t real, this isn’t real, this isn’t real repeating the mantra in her head to help herself from screaming out…before fainting right into the jester’s arms.

.

.

.

“You have some nerve scaring her like that?! Aren’t you supposed to be trained with scenarios like this?!”

Penny groaned at the sound of a loud and angered voice, it sounded like it belonged to a woman and seemed very familiar.

“I am trained for your information!” A male voice retaliated, “I didn’t know she was going to faint!”

“Okay, Riley calm down, Jack be nice!” Another female voice entered the conversation, sharper and more direct than the other two, “What happened right now was an accident, we just need to wait and see if Penny wakes up before we call an ambulance, that was the procedure right Jack?”

“Yeah, yeah,” the male voice was quiet now, “I’m sorry again Winter, I genuinely didn’t know.”

Penny opened her eyes, squinting at the light as she sat up on what seemed to be a mattress. “Oh good you’re awake,” there was a woman she had never seen before beside her, wearing a white hoodie with a red cross on it, “My name is Lianne, I’m a paramedic for the funhouse in case something like this happens.”

“Penny! Oh thank God!” Riley rushed over to her, wrapping her arms around her younger sister and pressed a kiss at the side of her head, “You gave me a heart attack going into that house, and then hearing that you fainted?! Don’t ever do that again!”

Oh that’s right, she fainted, that explained why Riley sounded so angry when she woke up. God help which soul she was speaking to that suffered her wrath. “I’m okay Riley, you were right I shouldn’t have gone in,” Penny sighed, “I’m just tired of not being normal so I wanted to prove-”

“-You don’t have to prove shit,” Riley interrupted, “And you are normal, who the fuck made you think you had to go into a haunted house to prove that you’re a ‘normal person’?”

“Uh…myself?” Penny smiled awkwardly.

Riley shook her head and smiled, it was good to see that she wasn’t actually mad, just really worried, but to be fair worse had happened to Penny to make her sister go into ‘overprotective mode’. “Just don’t push yourself too hard again, okay?” she asked. Penny nodded again, Riley smiled one last time before her eyes furrowed and she turned away to face someone else, “And as for you!”

Penny looked up to see how her sister was talking to when her cheeks suddenly turned red from embarrassment. It was the jester from earlier! He was quite a tall man, with golden brown skin and eyes, with his hair in short dreads pulled up into a ponytail. His face with mixed with both frustration and shame, it wasn’t helping with Riley shouting at him.

“Don’t think you’re off the hook for scaring my little sister!” Riley growled, “I can’t believe you made her faint!”

“How did I make her faint?!” he retorted, “I’ve never had a reaction like hers before I didn’t know she was that scared!”

“That is enough!” Winter stepped in, grabbing them both painfully by the ear for a few seconds and then let them go, “Riley, go outside so I can talk with you, and Jack please apologize to Penny.”

Jack signed, turning to Penny as the girl flushed even more, she still couldn’t believe she fainted in front of him! “I’m sorry,” he said honestly.

“This is the friend I was taking about,” said Winter, “We were supposed to meet up, but he got called in since someone cancelled their shift last minute, but someone forgot to text us!”

“What are you taking about?” He reached into his pocket for his phone, “I sent you message before my…oh…I forgot to actually send it.”

Penny snorted, she tried to hold it in, but she burst out laughing instead, she couldn’t help it, the absurdity of the situation was just too much. She was so caught up in laughing that she didn’t catch the soft smile that Jack had at her reaction.

“Jesus Christ Jack,” Winter rubbed her temples, “What am I gonna do with you?”

“I have a few ideas,” Riley glared at him.

“Okay, you!” She grabbed Riley’s hand, “Come with me, Jack, keep Penny company while I have a chat with my girlfriend.”

“What?!” Penny and Jack said in unison, but Winter had already slammed the door.

“I should, um,” They whipped round to see that the paramedic was still here, having witnessed the entire interaction, “I should go tell my boss that there’s no need to call an ambulance.”

With that, she rushed out the door, leaving the two to stew awkwardly with one another. Penny’s rapidly beating heart wasn’t helping either, she really didn’t want to have another fainting episode again. It didn’t help that this Jack guy was really handsome. Huh? Why did I think that?

“So…” she spoke up, gulping as Jack turned to her, his eyes focused as though he were studying her, like a bug being examined, “What’s the jester like life? I mean! What's the jester life like?! Not the other one, forget about that. In fact don’t talk to me at all! Or do! Don’t let me tell you what to do, I mean, you’re not the one spouting out word vomit!” Jack raised an eyebrow at her, Penny shoved her reddening face into her hands.

It was then Jack’s turn to start laughing, messy chortles escaping his mouth at her bizarre sentence, leading Penny to pout at his reaction. “Sorry toots,” the laughter died down once he saw he face, “I thought you were funny, didn’t mean to offend you. And to answer your question, the jester life is pretty good.”

“You think I’m funny?” she asked. It wasn’t the first time someone laughed at her, but not because they found her humorous.

“Yeah, not everyone can ‘spout word vomit’ and make it cute,” he told her.

Penny blushed. Okay, first he found her funny and now he found her cute, she really hoped he couldn’t hear how loud and fast her heart was beating. “Um, sorry for fainting on you,” she murmured, “Surprisingly it was not the lowest moment of my life.”

“You’re sorry for fainting?” He raised a brow at her again.

“Well it led to my sister yelling out you,” she told him, “I’m sorry about that as well, Riley can get pretty overprotective over me or our mom.”

“Yeah, Winter warned me about that,” he replied, remembering the way he tried to not tremble at her fiery gaze. “If looks could kill.”

“Tell me about it,” Penny nodded, her eyes scanned the costume he was wearing, now having a face attached to it made it less frightening. The way the fabric was stitched and how the everything on the piece was placed, it looked less like something from a Halloween shop and more something homemade. “Did you make this?”

“Huh, oh this? I wish,” he said, “I actually had it commissioned, sure it cost a bit more, but I wanted it to feel a bit more real, you know, to scare people and that.”

“Yeah, well it definitely worked,” Penny giggled, “As someone who does commissions for others as well, its nice when someone reaches out for us to make something.”

“Us?” he titled his head.

“I’m a costume designer, well, studying a course in costume design at college,” Penny explained, “I noticed how your outfit was made and it instantly clicked in my brain.”

“Oh really? Did you also make that rabbit suit you’re wearing?” he asked as he pointed to her onesie.

Penny rolled her eyes, “Not my best work but I had limited time when Winter and Riley asked me if I wanted to come to the Halloween festival. But hey, its warm and cozy for the season!”

“I think it looks cute on you,” he smiled and winked at her. It was a friendly wink, nothing behind it, but it still made Penny’s toes curl. “How about we start over, I’m Jack.” He held his hand out to her.

Penny took it in her own and shook it, “I’m Penny. So, how do you know Winter?”

There was a nervous flicker in his eyes, but he blinked it away before Penny asked anything else, “We meet as freshmen in high school, she was a few months older than me, but she took me under her wing, and we’ve been friends ever since. I met Riley as well when they started dating but I have a feeling I might be on her bad side now.”

Before Penny could say anything else, there was a crash and a scream before Winter and Riley rushed back into the room, slamming the door behind them. “We forgot this was a haunted funhouse,” Winter trembled, her and Riley’s faces paling.

Penny and Jack shared a glance, stifling their laughter as the couple pulled themselves together. “Anyways,” Riley brushed herself off, “We should head home and tell Mom what happened.”

“Right,” Penny nodded before turning back to Jack, “Hopefully we’ll see each other again, but somewhere else cause with all due respect I’m never stepping foot in this funhouse again.”

Jack chuckled, “That’s understandable, and sorry for scaring you again.”

“That’s okay, at least we finally met,” Penny grinned.

“Alright, home time for you miss,” Riley pulled Penny up, giving a final glare towards Jack before leading her sister away.

“It was nice to meet you, Jack!” Penny called back to him.

“The pleasure’s all mine!” Jack called back, giving Winter a hug before she chased after the sisters.

In the car ride back home, Penny found herself smiling. Jack was nice, granted she wished it didn’t take fainting for them to meet but she was glad she did. “So,” Winter turned in the passenger seat to face Penny in the back, “Sorry that it was under these events how you met Jack, hopefully you were okay with him.”

“I’m not,” said Riley, focused on the road.

“Just keep driving mama bear,” Winter rolled her eyes before turning to Penny again.

“I was okay with him, we actually got on pretty well,” she admitted, “I’m glad I finally met him.”

Winter smiled and turned to Riley to smirk at her, “So, it looks like ‘big bad Jack’ won over your little sister.”

“Must you taunt me?” Riley groaned.

“But that why you love me so much,” Winter teased kissed her loudly on the cheek, “It was my taunting that drew you to me.”

Riley tried and failed to repress a lovesick grin. Penny chuckled at her older sister and turned to face out the window again, counting the stars that passed. Hopefully she would meet Jack again.

.

.

.

Pomni woke with a start. What on this digital earth was that?!

Ever since she arrived here, she never had actually dreams before. Whenever she ‘slept’ it felt like she was switching off, like a button on a computer game and blacked out before she was ‘switched on’ again.

But that dream, why did it feel so real? She remembered the concept of dreams, how anything random would happen and the little control you would have over them. Maybe she was a lucid dreamer in her past life and that’s why this one had more will power in it?

She thought back to that Penny girl, she acted so much like her, the nervousness, her fear of mostly everything and her reaction when she went into that funhouse. Although now, she would gladly take that funhouse over this ‘Amazing Digital Circus’.

Then there was Penny’s sister, Riley. Despite how threatening she was at first glance, the protectiveness she had with her sister and the loved-filled eyes for her girlfriend made her feel a bit safer than she ever felt here.

Did Pomni have a family before the circus, did she have an older sister that would protect with without a second thought? Did she have a family that worried about her, wondering what happened to her?

Then she thought of Jack. She thought about him interacting with Penny, how cheeky yet sweet he was with her. And the way he looked at Penny. She felt herself blushing. In a way, his laidback attitude and mischievous grin, he reminded her a little bit of Jax…

She shook her head, she was being ridiculous, regardless of what Ragatha said when she came here, this was just and only a dream. Besides, it probably wouldn’t happen again, and things would return to its usual format here, just switching on and off again.

She sighed and shoved off her bed sheets, mentally preparing herself for whatever sanity Caine had up his sleeves.

Its not like anyone else was having these types of dreams, right?

That would be the case…for anyone who wasn’t Jax.

The rabbit was currently at the breakfast table, he Gangle and Kinger waiting for everyone else to arrive.

Just when he thought we finally got used to this place, he had an actual dream last night, not the usual shut down he received every night. He remembered every detail from the lights of the festival to the noises supplied from the funhouse and that Jack guy in the jester costume.

There wasn’t much he got from the dream about him, just that was someone who worked to scare people and make money out of it, honestly it seemed the ideal career path he would take if he weren’t stuck here.

But what made that dream so memorable for him was that Penny girl. The way she would shyly peek through her hands, to her kind smile and her knowledge with costumes, and of course he couldn’t forget about her fainting spell. Talk about an unexpected surprise.

Although, she did seem sweet in a way, whoever this Jack guy was he hoped that he was smart enough to see her again. Jax sighed, what was he talking about? This was a dream, plain and simple, yet here he was acting as though he knew this Jack person.

Just leave it he thought bitterly its stupid anyway.

“I’m gonna check where the rest of them at,” he told Gangle and Kinger, “Zooble probably lost one of his arms again, so I might as well hide it if that’s the case.”

“Wouldn’t you rather help them find it?” Gangle whimpered.

Jax huffed out a laugh, “And where’s the fun in that?”

He got out from his chair, only to bump into another body, almost losing his balance, “Hey, watch where your-”

He looked down to see Pomni sitting on the ground, probably from him bumping into her, her red and blue eyes widening when she realised what she did.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” she burst out, “Usually I sit next to you whenever we eat, and I didn’t see you sitting up but I’m still really sorry either way I shouldn’t have done that-”

“-Not the other one, forget about that. In fact don’t talk to me at all! Or do! Don’t let me tell you what to do, I mean, you’re not the one spouting out word vomit!”

“I’m really sorry!”

Jax snapped out of his trance, looking down at Pomni again, her eyes looking both sad and apologetic. He signed, reaching down to pull her up by the end. “Relax pom-pom, it wasn’t like you planned to do that…unless?”

“What, no, of course not!” she yelped.

 Jax laughed, the newbie was easy to rile up.

“Shut up Jax,” Zooble moved past him to get to their spot, “Let’s just get breakfast over with before we need to deal with the headache Caine is gonna give us.”

“Whatever,” Jax slumped back into his seat, Pomni gently placing herself upon hers as Zooble and Ragatha did the same.

The way Pomni acted just then, the way she was quick to flush and stutter over her words, and the fact that she was so nervous about everything as well. It was all just like Penny.

No, don’t, don’t be stupid Jax. Jack isn’t real, Penny isn’t real, so don’t bother comparing her to Pomni.

With that, he let himself continue with his food.

But it wouldn’t be the last time he or Pomni would make these comparisons, and it definitely wouldn’t be the last time they had these ‘dreams.’

See you next time, let me know if I've written them well, this is the first time writing for this fandom. And who knows, perhaps next chapter the sillies might actually go on a date? 🤷

[jpmarvel90]

A Daughter Like You

Masterlist Nat Masterlist

Relationship: MamaNat x 16 yr old Reader

Summary: An arguement between mother and daughter could turn deadly.

Word Count: 3917

Y/N's POV:

You'd think that being the daughter of THE Black Widow would have Its perks, but you'd be wrong. I love my Mom, she's always protected me and given me the best life she can, but there is so much pressure that comes with that. I'm expected to be just as good as her in combat training and she trains me extra hard to make sure. If my grades even slightly dip below an A, I'm scolded and made to do extra work to make up for it. But I've always sucked it up because I know she's always wanted the best for me.

That's until these last few weeks. It's like she doesn't have any time for me anymore. She's stopped training me and always uses work as an excuse to not hang around with me. I feel like she's slowly pushing me away and it's starting to affect my school work. I've been struggling with maths for a while, and I knocked on my Mom's door to ask for help. She's always taken the time to help me in the past. I lightly knocked on her door as I heard a sigh followed by a harsh "Come in".

I slowly enter her room and see her hunched at her desk. "Hi Mom, I was wondering if you could help me with my homework? I just can't seem to get my head around trigonometry." Without even looking up at me, and still typing away at her laptop she pushes me away. "Not now Y/N, I'm busy with work. You know not to disturb me when I'm working." I feel a small twinge in my heart, slightly hurt at her words, and turn to walk out the door. "Right, of course. Sorry Mom." I try to hide the tears that are starting to form in my eyes.

I shut her door carefully and run to my room locking it behind me. What have I done wrong? For weeks she has ignored me and scolded me for interrupting her. Did she no longer want me? Was it because I was 16 now and she considered me old enough to not need my Mom? All I know is that this hurts. I miss my Mom.

A week later and nothing had changed. I had gotten a D on my Maths exam and I was dreading telling Mom. I was hoping that she wouldn't remember and ignore me like she has for the past couple of months. But luck was not on my side. The first time she wants to talk to me is about the one test I screwed up on. "Y/N how did your test go? I hope you're keeping up with your good grades." Mom, stalked into the living room and stood across from me, arms crossed against her chest. "uh, well about that. I was struggling with a couple of the topics and I, uh, I got a D." I rushed out scared of her response. 

There was a silence before she dropped her arms down by her side with a huff. "A D Y/N? Come on, I've raised you to be better than that." "But Mom,-" "No buts Y/N. This is unacceptable. My daughter does not get Ds! You need to get yourself together young lady. For punishment I'm not allowing you to attend Homecoming this weekend." I just stood there in shock. She had no empathy at all. "Mom, please, it's one test. I was struggling and I did ask for your help but-" Well that was the wrong thing to say. She turned with such fury to stare at me. "Are you trying to blame me? I'm sorry I've been busy with work but this is all on you. I thought I brought you up better than to come up with excuses for your own mistakes. Jesus Y/N, surely you're not that stupid?!" Her words cut through me like a knife. Each one said with such intent. Before I knew it my mouth was talking without my brain knowing.

"You cannot be serious right now Mom. You've barely spoken to me for the last 2 months! You don't train me, you don't help me with my school work and you certainly don't seem to want to spend more than a minute in the same room as me. I've done everything you have ever asked of me, made every sacrifice. So what is it Mom, am I no longer enough for you? Because you have been no more of a Mom to me these last couple of months than anyone else in this building!"

My heart is racing, and I can feel tears stinging my eyes. Then I feel the hot tingling sensation on my cheek as my Mom's hand slapped me. "Perhaps I would want to spend time with you if you weren't a needy, pathetic teenager!" I gasped as the words came out of her mouth like venom. I could no longer stop the tears as they fell down my face. In that moment I saw a flash of guilt across her face. "Y/N, I, I didn't mean that, I –" But before she could finish I turned on my heel running to my room, almost knocking Wanda over as went. "Watch out there Y/N/N!" she called, but I didn't stop to apologise. I got in my room and locked my door, falling to me knees and letting out my sobs.

After a couple of hours I woke up, I must have cried myself to sleep. I look to my phone and see it's 11pm. No messages from Mom and she hasn't come to check on me. She must really have meant it. In a split second I made the decision that I need to leave. Mom clearly doesn't want me around anymore so I'm not going to stay whilst I'm being made to feel shit about it. I grab a duffle bag and throw in clothes and items to get me by for the next few days. I had plenty of money saved up so I didn't need to worry about that.

Once I had all of my stuff together, I took one last look at my room before heading out. I managed to get out of the compound without being detected. I considered taking one of Tony's cars but I knew they would be able to trace it. That's if anyone even noticed I was gone. Walking was my best option to stay hidden from them.

I started to make my way to the closest hotel that I knew. In hindsight I should have got a cab. It was now 11:30pm and I was very aware of being out on my own. I knew I was getting close and made the most stupid decision to cut down the ally way to get there quicker. "What's a pretty young girl like you doing in a place like this?" I turned and saw a man about 40 walk out from behind me. I could smell the alcohol on his breath from 10 feet away. I turned to run as quick as I could, only find his hand take a tight grasp around my bicep pulling me around viciously.

"Well I think you need to be taught some manners there Miss!" He slurred his words as he launched his left hand across my face knocking me to the floor. "Bitch get up!" he spat. I tried to pull me self to my feet only to be meet with a fist to my jaw. I tried to stand again this time taking boot directly to my head knocking me out cold.

Nat's POV:

I can't get Y/N's look out of my head. Why did I say that, why did I slap her? I didn't mean it. I'm stressed with work but that is no excuse. I'm so shocked at the words that so easily left my mouth that I don't move when she runs off. It's not until Wanda shakes me that I come back to my senses. "Hey Nat, are you and Y/N ok?" Wanda says, concern evident in her eyes. I can't bring myself to tell her the truth. "Uh we just had an argument that's all." I lie. "Do you want me to go and check on her?" Wanda asks still holding my hand in hers. I shake my head. "No I should go. But I think I'll let her cool off first and take her out for breakfast in the morning to talk." I hesitate before asking Wanda a question I don't think I want the answer to. "How has Y/N seemed to you these last few weeks?" She pauses and takes a moment to think. "I had noticed she hasn't been her usual bubbly self. I hadn't seen the two of you training or hanging out at all so thought she was working on her schoolwork, for these exams she's got at the moment. She was really struggling on her maths revision. I tried to help but she is way smarter than I am" She chuckled at the last sentence before asking "why is something wrong?".

As I nodded my head I felt Wanda brush her thumb across my cheek wiping away tears I hadn't realised were falling. "I've screwed up Wanda." Was all I was able to get out before I started to sob into her arms. She sat and held me whispering sweet things to me to help me calm down. "Everything will be ok Nat, Y/N adores you. Whatever it is that was said between you will be forgotten by tomorrow." Oh how I wished that were true.

Timeskip to the morning

I had barely slept all night just repeating the awful words I had said to my daughter, in my head. I waited until it was 8am and decided to go and wake her to talk. I walked up to her door and paused before knocking. "Y/N honey, it's me. Can I come in?" I waited but no response. I knocked again, a bit louder this time. "Y/N, please we need to talk. I need to apologise." Nothing. I reach for the door nob and turn it walking into her room. I look to her bed and it's empty. "Y/N, are you in the bathroom?" I call before knocking and find that room also empty.

As I enter her bedroom again, I notice that her draws are slightly open and most of her clothes are gone. In that moment panic fills me. I rush to her bed and pull out the box I know she keeps her money in. Shit, it's empty. "JARVIS where is Y/N?" I call out trying not to let myself complete break. "Miss Y/N left the compound shortly after 11pm yesterday. She has not returned". I can't believe it. Why didn't I just come up after her yesterday. I've forced my baby to leave.

I run out of Y/N's room to Wanda's next door, banging to wake her up. "What the hell Nat?" Wanda says half asleep. "It's Y/N, she's gone! She's taken her stuff and left late last night! I've fucked up Wanda, I've lost her!" I start sobbing, I can't lose by baby girl. Wanda is suddenly awake throwing on a pair of sweatpants and a hoody as she comes out of her room. "Come on, we'll find her. Let's get Tony to check all the CCTV that he can, and we'll head out in the car and try and find her. Is there anywhere you can think of that she would go?" Wanda taking control is helping me to calm down a bit as I think of the logistics of finding her. "Uh maybe she's gone to a friend or a local hotel?"

I take out my phone and try calling her again. Straight to voicemail. "Ok well you call her friends and I'll talk to Tony, we'll meeting in the garage in 20 minutes ok." Wanda pulls me into a tight hug before running off to find Tony.

We spent all day looking for Y/N and we couldn't find her anywhere. Tony had checked all the cameras he could and all he could find is that she left by foot. I was so anxious, I hated that she knew how to go off the grid, just like I taught her. I was just hoping she would make a mistake and we'd find her. The whole team spent the night in the living area trying to find anything. They were as desperate as I was to find her again. She may have been my daughter, but they all treated her as their own. I was stupid to not realise that the only person she wanted was me. I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for the way I hurt her. I know that she won't!

It was about 5 in the morning when my phone rang with a number I didn't recognise. I looked up at Tony and started to feel the fear start to grow. Had she been taken? I hadn't even considered that, I just assumed she had ran. "Nat, answer it. I'll trace it." Tony said giving me a small smile. "Hello?" I answered cautiously. "Is that Natasha Romanoff?" The mysterious voice on the other end asked. "Yes, that's me." "Hi, I'm Holly Goodall, I'm a nurse at New York – Presbyterian Hospital. Is your daughter Y/N Romanoff?" My heart stopped and I felt like the world had just fallen out from beneath me. "Y-Yes she is, is she ok? What's happened?" I rise to my feet in panic as I feel Wanda wrap an arm around my waist. "Y/N has been admitted after being found in an alley way severely beaten." My ears started to ring, and I couldn't hear anything else. All of the team's eyes were on me. "Ma'am, are you still there?" I hear from down the phone. "I'm on my way."

I hang up and fill the team in. We rush to the hospital as quickly as we can. I'm sat with Wanda in the waiting room for the Doctor to come and speak with us. She has my hands in hers trying to keep me calm. But I'm very aware that she is also scared as tears quietly fall down her face. I squeeze her hands and smile at her in thanks for the support she's given me. I honestly would have been a mess if it wasn't for her.

I see a tall doctor walking to the waiting room as he called for us. I shot up from my seat still gripping on to Wanda's hand. "How is she?" we ask in unison. "Your daughter is very lucky to be alive. She has a broken arm and internal bleeding, as well as a nasty concussion and brain bleed. We don't believe she'll need any further surgery so we will monitor her over the coming days and hopefully she'll be able to head home by the weekend to finish her recovery there. If you'd like to follow me, I can take you to her." I smile at the doctor and let out a breath. Tony catches up to me and whispers in my ear, "give me the word and I'll get her transferred back to the hospital wing at the compound."

I pause outside the door taking a deep breath before I enter. Wanda is still with me holding my hand tight. "You should go in on your own. We'll wait out here and I'll send Steve to grab somethings for you both." I nod and pull her into a tight hug. "Thank you Wanda. I couldn't have gotten through today without you!" She leaves a small kiss on my cheek and gives me a nudge towards the door.

What I see breaks my heart as I open the door. My beautiful daughter led in bed, her arm in a cast, her body and face battered and bruised with stitches holding together a deep cut across her forehead into her eyebrow. I stare at her knowing that all of this is my fault. My baby could have been dead and it would have all been my fault.

I pull up the chair to the side of her bed and take her hand in mine. I take in every little detail, each bruise, each cut, all of the wires connecting to machines. How could I let this happen? Y/N is my whole world, how did I let work cloud that? I still hear my words, from that night's argument, ring around my head. I don't think she'll ever forgive me.

After an hour or so, Y/N starts to stir and I bolt upright grabbing her hand,  brushing her hair out of her face. She winces as she tries to sit up. "Hey baby girl, stay still ok, you need to lie down." I gentle encourage her to lie back in her bed and take a seat on the edge of her bed. I can see her eyes darting around the room trying to adjust to her surroundings before they land on me. "Y/N Honey, I'm so sorry for what I said and did. I didn't mean any of it. I let work get the better of me and lost focus of what my priorities were." I state calmly whilst rubbing circles on the back of her hand. She looks at me emotionless "I thought you were brought up better than to come up with excuses for your own mistakes. Surely you're not that stupid?" Like a dagger to my heart, she repeated the words I had so viciously used against her two days ago. "Y/N please, I'm so sorry. Just talk to me?" I can feel tears threatening to escape as Y/N turns in the bed facing away from me. "I can't do this Mom, you don't need to pretend anymore. Please just leave." I can hear quiet sniffles and I know she's trying so hard to be strong right now.

"I'm not leaving you Y/N. I'm your Mother and you're hurt." "Well, you didn't want me as your daughter two days ago. I'm sorry I was such a disappointment to you. I just wish you knew how hard I tried to make you proud. Now please just leave." I hesitate, the decision I make right now will either make or break us. "I have always been proud of you Y/N. You are the best of me, the only thing I've ever done right. I'm not going anywhere. I don't care if you ignore me, but I'm going to stay here and show you how much I love you." I don't get a response, but she doesn't push for me to leave so I take that as a good sign.

Tony had arranged for Y/N to be transferred back to the compound and Bruce took over her care. Her internal injuries were slowly healing and by the weekend he was happy for her to move back to her room. I had barely left her, only going to eat or shower. She still wasn't talking to me but still allowed me to stay. I hoped that once she was feeling better, we could talk again and start to mend our relationship.

Wanda and I helped get her settled back in her room and I started to set up a makeshift bed on her sofa. "What are you doing?" Y/N asked whilst getting comfortable in her own bed. "I'm setting up a bed so I can stay." I respond. "I'm fine, you don't need to watch over me." She had such a harsh look on her face. It was quite intimidating with the cuts on her face. Thankfully Wanda steps in. "Bruce said that someone has to be with you if you don't want to be in the hospital wing anymore." It was a lie but one that Y/N accepted. "Fine" she huffled whilst turning in her bed to sleep. I gave Wanda a thankful smile. "If you need anything give me a shout." She gives me a brief hug before leaving.

I led on the sofa staring at the ceiling wondering if my daughter would ever forgive me. Just as I was about to drift off to sleep, I hear Y/N start to toss in her bed, slight mumbling as she did. I sit up and observe her but before I could comprehend if it was a dream or nightmare she suddenly called out. "NO, please don't hit me. STOP! PLEASE" and with that she shot up, breathing erratic and sweat forming on her forehead. I jump up and pull her into a tight hug. "Shhhh, it's ok baby, it was just a nightmare. You're ok. I'm hear." Gently rocking her back and forth I try to calm her. "But you weren't Mom. You weren't there for me."

My heart broke. I couldn't do anything but hold her tight and help her to calm down. No words I could say in this moment would make everything better. I just had to be there for her. After she had calmed down I unwrapped my arms from around her and stepped out of the bed. But I felt her hand grasp on to my wrist. "Can you stay? I don't think I can sleep on my own." It was barely a whisper but I heard it. I lifted the cover and opened my arms to allow Y/N to cuddle me. She didn't hesitate and snuggled her head into my neck. I gentle rubbed her back helping to calm her.

"This doesn't mean I forgive you Mom. I love you but you hurt me." She looked up at me from my chest and made eye contact with me for the first time since we've gotten home. "I know baby. I wish I could take back what I said. There was no excuse for it. I love you more than you'll ever know but I know I haven't shown it recently. I promise that I will win back your trust. I'm not going anywhere." Her eyes darted between my own looking for confirmation that I was telling the truth. I hope she saw it. After a few seconds she sighed and snuggled back into me eventually falling back asleep. "Goodnight my angel, I love you." I whisper before succumbing to my own sleep.

For the next couple of weeks, I did everything I could to prove to Y/N that I loved her and I was sorry. I took time off of work to help her fully recover and made sure I spent time with her. At first it seemed like I was only allowed to be her mother when she was struck by her nightmares. I would hold her each night and quietly hum to help her feel safe and to fall back asleep. Over time as her nightmares reduced, she started to let me do more for her. It took time, but eventually she was actively choosing to spend time with me rather than me forcing it.

I will never forget the day I almost lost my daughter from my own stupidity. It became the fuel to my fire to ensure that I proved to her every day how much she meant to me and how much I loved her. Once she forgave me, I knew I would never allow her to feel like she wasn't my world again.

[bigforeheadbaddie]

Fiona Apple when she has to opt out of performing for personal reasons:

“It's 6pm on Friday, and I'm writing to a few thousand friends I have not met yet.

I am writing to ask them to change our plans and meet a little while later.

Here's the thing.

I have a dog Janet, and she's been ill for almost two years now, as a tumor has been idling in her chest, growing ever so slowly. She's almost 14 years old now.I got her when she was 4 months old. I was 21 then ,an adult officially – and she was my child.

She is a pitbull, and was found in Echo Park, with a rope around her neck, and bites all over her ears and face.

She was the one the dogfighters use to puff up the confidence of the contenders.

She's almost 14 and I've never seen her start a fight ,or bite, or even growl, so I can understand why they chose her for that awful role. She's a pacifist.

Janet has been the most consistent relationship of my adult life, and that is just a fact.

We've lived in numerous houses, and jumped a few make shift families, but it's always really been the two of us.

She slept in bed with me, her head on the pillow, and she accepted my hysterical, tearful face into her chest, with her paws around me, every time I was heartbroken, or spirit-broken, or just lost, and as years went by, she let me take the role of her child, as I fell asleep, with her chin resting above my head.

She was under the piano when I wrote songs, barked any time I tried to record anything, and she was in the studio with me all the time we recorded the last album.

The last time I came back from tour, she was spry as ever, and she's used to me being gone for a few weeks every 6 or 7 years.

She has Addison's Disease, which makes it dangerous for her to travel since she needs regular injections of Cortisol, because she reacts to stress and to excitement without the physiological tools which keep most of us from literally panicking to death.

Despite all of this, she's effortlessly joyful and playful, and only stopped acting like a puppy about 3 years ago.

She's my best friend and my mother and my daughter, my benefactor, and she's the one who taught me what love is.

I can't come to South America. Not now.

When I got back from the last leg of the US tour, there was a big, big difference

She doesn't even want to go for walks anymore.

I know that she's not sad about aging or dying. Animals have a survival instinct, but a sense of mortality and vanity, they do not. That's why they are so much more present than people.

But I know that she is coming close to point where she will stop being a dog, and instead, be part of everything. She'll be in the wind, and in the soil, and the snow, and in me, wherever I go.

I just can't leave her now, please understand.

If I go away again, I'm afraid she'll die and I won't have the honor of singing her to sleep, of escorting her out.

Sometimes it takes me 20 minutes to pick which socks to wear to bed.

But this decision is instant.

These are the choices we make, which define us.

I will not be the woman who puts her career ahead of love and friendship.

I am the woman who stays home and bakes Tilapia for my dearest, oldest friend.

And helps her be comfortable, and comforted, and safe, and important.

Many of us these days, we dread the death of a loved one. It is the ugly truth of Life, that keeps us feeling terrified and alone.

I wish we could also appreciate the time that lies right beside the end of time.

I know that I will feel the most overwhelming knowledge of her, and of her life and of my love for her, in the last moments.

I need to do my damnedest to be there for that.

Because it will be the most beautiful, the most intense, the most enriching experience of life I've ever known.

When she dies.

So I am staying home, and I am listening to her snore and wheeze, and reveling in the swampiest, most awful breath that ever emanated from an angel.

And I am asking for your blessing.I'll be seeing you.

Love, Fiona”

———————————————————————

Chappell Roan when she gets flamed on the internet for claiming to have done her research and then promptly mispronounces the current Vice President’s (very simple) name:

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

@ckhalloween23 heyyyyyy bestie(s) I know I'm an entire-ass month late, BUT

HERE'S A PREVIEW OF THE ELIMETRI DARKFIC I PROMISED

Listen, y'all can't give me a "Serial Killers" prompt and the opportunity to write the dark, unhinged Demetri Alexopoulos of my dreams presented on a silver platter and NOT expect me to go a little apeshit ^^;

Or. A lot apeshit. Because boy did I let this funny little comic relief guy SNAP ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

Also, funnily enough, I realized over the course of the last year or so that I'm probably autistic? For the longest time I held off on writing Hawk's POV because I hc him as autistic and I didn't think I could do him justice, but...I've unlocked this Fun Secret Collector's Item now, I guess XD Eli "Hawk" Moskowitz POV acquired!

Decided to give it a stab here, since him having NO fucking idea how to react to Crazy Demetri was just too much fun. Hawk came to me surprisingly easy once I got started, actually??? I mean I've always related to him a lot but I had no idea it was like. An autism thing. I thought it was just an ND thing akisudhlkuhyfu

Head's up to Tory and Robby stans...this may not be the fic for you. You have been warned 👀

CW for blood, violence, knife-threatening, light knifeplay, toxic relationships (although YMMV), mentions of murder, implied slut-shaming, homophobic slurs, and sexual subtext.

Fic under the cut! As always, moodboard pic credits available upon request :3

***

Hawk’s on his 30th rep when he hears the front door.

He stops mid-jab, the punching bag rattling on its chain as it sways back and forth. Scoffing, he rolls his eyes.

His mom must be home early. How fucking annoying.

He was looking forward to having the house to himself. With his father on a weekend-long business trip and his mother at her Friday night wine hangout, he was finally going to catch up on training without any interruptions.

The last thing he needs is to be outdone by Kyler Park and Robby Fucking Keene.

Hopefully his mom won’t come knocking, pestering him to watch movies or some other frivolous crap. He doesn’t have time for that anymore.

Strange. There’s a notable lack of the jingling and clattering that usually comes from 50 million things being shifted through an oversize purse. Hawk pauses, listening for any noise.

Maybe he imagined it.

“What the hell.” He takes a sip of the Red Bull on his bedside. Some sleep-deprived delirium or whatever it was wasn’t going to fuck up his focus.

Sure, he’s been averaging 5 hours a night, but who gives a shit? It’s not like anyone in high school actually gets enough sleep.

Sensei Kreese said in ‘Nam, they had to be ready to fight on a moment’s notice—geared to slaughter enemies after a mere 30 minutes’ rest in 48 hours. Hawk doesn’t strive for anything less.

The stairs creak.

His mom isn’t usually one for sneaking past his room, but perhaps she’s too tired to be chatty. He thanks the powers that be this seems to be the case, and returns to his reps.

Jab, cross, roundhouse. Jab, cross, roundhouse. Elbow. Knee to the chest.

He counts them out as he goes, power surging through him. Sensei will be sorry he started singing Keene’s praises when Hawk’s a better fighter than that piece of shit ever was.

Because throwing someone off a balcony when they had their guard down was a coward’s move. Typical Miyagi Do bullshit.

God, Hawk hates them. Hypocrites. Losers. Pussies.

He thinks of a new insult every time he lands a punch.

Miguel’s fucking insane for not appreciating what Cobra Kai did to get payback. What Hawk did to get payback.

His fists are starting to ache, fingers burning from being smashed against rubber again and again. Hawk doesn’t care.

Sensei would say the pain makes him stronger.

Jab cross jab cross jab cross jab cross jab cross jab cross jab cross—

“You know, at some point, I think you’re as good as you’re going to get at punching.”

A shadow blocks the hallway light.

Dread grips him in frosty talons. His arms still, the punching bag swinging back and smacking his chest.

He gasps, stumbling back. Still, he refuses to look at the doorway.

Refuses to let Demetri see his shock.

“What the fuck are you doing in my house?”

He presses as much venom into the words as possible. Enough intimidation, and Demetri will back down.

He knows now that Hawk is as real a threat as he ever was. And Demetri’s smart enough not to keep poking at a tiger that’s already mauled him.

“In what world would I not remember where you keep your spare keys?” Demetri sneers.

Well. Maybe that’s a bit generous.

“What do you want?”

Hawk keeps his tone steely, hoping he can kill whatever plans are swimming around his ex-best-friend’s head before they even form. In all likelihood, Demetri’s here to be a nuisance at best and a night-ruiner at worst.

Fucking Demetri. He’s always been such a distraction.

Hawk needs to get rid of those.

He thought he did. But Demetri is apparently either too stupid or too obsessed with the past to be properly scared away.

Irritating, but admittedly also interesting. It shows a kind of boldness that he wouldn’t expect Demetri, of all people, to have.

“Maybe I want to check in on my best friend.” Groaning footfalls as Demetri starts to slowly cross Hawk’s room. “I see you avoiding me at school. And you didn’t even bother to show when your little friends crashed Sam’s party. Perhaps I want to see how you are, hmmmm?”

And try as he might, Hawk can’t pick up the usual sarcastic edge to Demetri’s tone. He frowns at his far wall, confused.

There’s something odd in Demetri’s voice, and Hawk can’t for the life of him pick up what it is.

He still refuses to look at his oldest friend. He’s not going to give him the satisfaction of undivided attention.

Demetri is a pest, and should be treated as such.

“We’re not best friends,” Hawk says tightly, landing another punch on his bag. “Whatever we were? It’s done. Has been for a long time. Why can’t you get that?”

He finally graces Demetri with a look. He’s expecting the usual sullen look—scrunched brow, open mouth, widened eyes. Like he’s eternally surprised Hawk doesn’t need him anymore.

A look where maybe, if he prods it farther, Demetri will storm off. Or run off crying. Be out of Hawk’s sight.

Be somewhere where Hawk doesn’t have to think about that night at Golf N Stuff. Or how it felt to watch Demetri writhe on the floor. Or the streams of vomit that ripped from Hawk’s stomach as soon as he got home.

Or what he did to himself in the wee hours of the morning, when no one—not his mother, not Cobra Kai, not Sensei Kreese—was around to see.

But when Hawk glances over now, Demetri is smiling.

Not a contemptuous sneer, or a pained grimace. A full-on grin, splitting his cheeks and stretching much wider than the situation calls for.

Hawk inhales sharply.

Demetri shakes his head, laughing. “It’s almost endearing, you know. What a tryhard you are.”

He squares his jaw, refusing to budge as Demetri advances on him. “I thought I made it pretty clear what I think about you. You want another reminder?”

Hawk balls his fists, trying not to think about how hard the words are to force out. How hard he’s working to keep the iron shell he’s built around himself intact.

A strange smell hovers around Demetri. Acrid and metallic, like he’s spent too much time mucking around inside one of those computers he’s so besotted with.

“How revoltingly naïve.” Green eyes burn into him like acid, the glint behind them unlike anything he’s ever seen. “You thought you’d break my arm once and be done with me?

Hawk finds himself backing away.

“I’m not going to make it that easy for you, Hawk.”

Something in the way Demetri spits his new name finally gives him clarity.

“So what the fuck do you want from me?” he spits. “Why did you come here?”

“I came here because you were right. About everything.”

Any response is snatched from Hawk’s mouth.

For several seconds, all he can do is stare. Demetri smirks, apparently reveling in getting a leg up.

Hawk is so confused that he can’t even find it in himself to be angry. A strangled “what?” is all that comes out, pulling a snigger from his adversary.

“You think you’ve got it all figured out. Becoming the scariest fighter in the Valley. Making everyone quiver at the sight of you. Doing whatever you like because people aren’t brave enough to tell you no. Becoming your badass karate teacher’s little golden child. Getting rid of your weaknesses. Getting rid of me. But there’s one thing you got wrong.”

Typical Demetri. Monologuing around the point.

But Hawk is, nonetheless, finding his confusion turning to intrigue.

The mopey kicked puppy routine had gotten unbearably tedious. At least Demetri finally has the decency to give Hawk some variety.

“Oh, yeah?” He curls his lip. “What’s that?”

Demetri casually leans on Hawk’s dresser, like this is nothing more than a Friday night video game session.

“You think I avoid fights because I’m scared. But that’s not true anymore.” And there’s that grin again—that wide, unnerving grin that looks like it was pasted on from another human being’s face. The sort of manic look that would never in a thousand years belong on Demetri Alexopoulos.

“I avoid fights because I know who’s worth fighting. And who’s worth hurting.”

Well, that’s new.

Hawk narrows his eyes, trying to piece together if this is all some kind of trick.

“See, Eli, you were right that the world isn’t kind to people who get too soft.” Demetri starts sauntering over again, and that odd, metallic smell strengthens. “Or losers. Or weaklings. Or people who admit defeat. Give in too easily. Run off cowering and scared. So I’m shaking all that off. Next time I fight, I won’t lose.”

As Hawk pieces everything together, he scowls.

“So that’s what you want?” he hisses. “A rematch? Like you’d stand a chance.”

“So touchy. Do you only think of people in terms of whether you can beat them in a fight now? Boooooring.”

Demetri clicks his tongue disapprovingly. It’s a mocking gesture he’s been doing since they were little, but now something about it feels chilling.

Hawk’s back bumps his bedroom wall. Demetri’s closing in on him.

Fucking hell—he’s getting fed up with this cat-and-mouse. Why is he even entertaining this stupid nerd again?

It’s not like he gives a shit about him anymore. Then he wouldn’t snap his arm in half.

“Fuck off, Demetri!” he roars. “I fucking hate you. I don’t give a shit about anything you have to say! Get the hell out of my house, or I swear to god I’ll break your arm again.”

He fills the words with fire and force and poison, hoping something will hurt Demetri enough to make him go.

He can’t cave again. Not after he’s worked this hard to oust Demetri and everything he represents from his life.

Not after he’s severed Demetri’s bone with his own hands and smiled with his friends about it.

That should’ve been the last straw. That should’ve been what sent Demetri running for good, abandoning everything they’d once had to save himself.

But it didn’t. It fucking didn’t.

Demetri takes another step into his space, curling his lip. “You’re full of shit.”

“Fuck you.” Eli returns his stare, baring his teeth. “How are you so sure?”

“Because you hesitated.”

Hawk goes rigid.

“I begged you to stop.” Demetri’s hands slide onto the wall on either side of him, trapping him. “And you thought about it. You didn’t break my arm until all your psychotic teammates goaded you on. If you really hated me?” His voice drops to a breathy whisper. “You wouldn’t have even thought twice.”

“You don’t know shit.”

Demetri snickers.

“Poor little Eli. You’ve always sucked at arguing when you get backed into a corner.”

“I still broke it,” Hawk growls. “You know I can do it. Easily. So how are you stupid enough that you’re still fucking with me? You some kind of masochist?”

“You still care about me, Eli.” They’re inches apart now, Demetri leering over Hawk. “You never got over me not wanting to join your little club of sociopaths. Whenever there’s a rumble, you can’t stay away from me. And you want to know what I think?”

“Shut up.”

Demetri’s voice is husky in Hawk’s ear. “You wouldn’t hurt me when there’s no one to show off to.”

Hawk’s done with this.

He lunges, shoving Demetri’s chest and flying at him with an outstretched fist. He waits for that gratifying moment of shock—the familiar shift in Demetri’s features as he realizes yet again Hawk has no intention of going easy on him.

Demetri doesn’t even blink as he moves out of the way.

Hawk course-corrects, swiveling and diving for Demetri again. He throws the fastest punch he can manage straight at Demetri’s jaw.

Why the hell won’t he give up?

Demetri’s fantastic at giving up. He always has been. He gave up on standing up to bullies and he gave up on Cobra Kai and he gave up on Sensei Kreese.

So why won’t he give up on Hawk?

Demetri doesn’t dodge this time. He only swerves, allowing the fist to graze his chin.

He lets out a hiss of pain—angry, but not surprised.

Without warning, Demetri’s hands shoot up. Hawk freezes as long fingers snake across the skin of his arm.

The next second he’s screaming, Demetri’s hands twisting until his skin burns. The other boy’s grip tightens, thrusting him toward the floor.

He’s stealing my fucking moves again.

And frustratingly, he can do them fast. Hawk barely manages to use his other arm to shove Demetri off, stumbling back.

Even one moment of disorientation is too long. Demetri charges again, teeth bared like a wild animal.

One arm slams him against his bedroom wall while the other digs into his chest, squeezing the air out of him. And Hawk hates to admit it, but Demetri’s training-broadened shoulders have a terrifying amount of power behind them.

Nothing he can’t handle. Hawk’s taken on bigger opponents before.

He squirms in Demetri’s grip, his own arms loosening enough for his hands to make a grab for the taller boy’s throat. Then Demetri’s pinning hand is gone, slipping in and out of his jacket in what feels like less than a heartbeat.

Something cold and sharp presses Hawk’s throat. His hands drop, tensing against the wall.

“What the fuck…?”

“I didn’t want to hurt you, Eli.” Demetri tilts his head, pouting mockingly. “But you make it so damn hard to talk to you. Can’t do a thing without you coming at me like some kind of rabid coyote.”

“So you pull a…are you fucking insane?”

“Like you’re one to talk, Mr. Red Hulk Rage Issues.” The pout morphs into a smirk. “Clearly, you’re not above playing dirty, using that sad little Eli voice of yours to get out of trouble. Figured it was time I caught up.”

Hawk feels something sticky dripping down his neck. His breath hitches in his throat.

He aims a hit at Demetri’s stomach. The taller boy bends with it, and the blade presses harder.

“Oh, come now.” Demetri tuts disapprovingly. “Don’t make me slit your throat.”

Hawk hardens his expression, channeling everything in him into hiding the shock.

“You wouldn’t.”

“I don’t think you’re in a great place to test that.”

And he’s right. Hawk hates it, but he’s right.

This isn’t the Demetri he knows better than the back of his hand. The Demetri he knows so uncomfortably well that he convinced himself over and over and over that it meant he was sick of the fucking geek.

This isn’t grounded, rational, sensible Demetri. Something’s snipped his threads, made him start fraying at the edges.

He’s unraveling, floating in an ether where the pragmatic and the path of least resistance that he made his life philosophy are losing their appeal. He’s…

Well, it seems he’s done some script-flipping of his own. Decided—perhaps on a whim—to overhaul everything Hawk knew and replace it with something cold and alien and completely fucking unpredictable.

Was this how Demetri felt, that day Hawk showed up at school with spiked hair and a conniving sneer? Is this some kind of payback?

He doesn’t care if this new boy with a knife to his throat killed and gutted the friend he grew up with. It doesn’t matter anymore. That relationship only ever got in the way, anyhow.

He truly could not care less. Honest.

The only emotion he feels is annoyance that this new opponent will be harder to match, with erratic moves and a quickly-thinning conscience.

This Demetri isn’t pulling any punches. One stupid or sloppy move, and Hawk will be on the floor gurgling his life out.

He’s never taken Demetri for someone impulsive, but perhaps he just had a talent for controlling his most brutal and primal urges—for his own safety, if nothing else. Perhaps he’s lost this ability.

Hawk wonders what it says about him that he isn’t bothered by this at all. If anything, he finds the whole concept exhilarating.

Fighting Demetri had gotten so boring. Now, at last, they’re on equal footing.

Regardless, there could be a trace of the Old Demetri yet. He might be able to use that.

“Put the fucking knife away or I’ll call the cops,” Hawk snarls. “Think you’ll get into Stanford with a police report on your permanent record? Or whatever fucking nerd school you’re trying to—”

“With what phone?” Demetri interrupts. “The one you left on the coffee table downstairs so it won’t distract you from wailing on your stupid bag?”

Fuck. How did Demetri even notice shit like that?

Hawk tries not to let the dismay show.

“When my mom gets home, she’ll—”

“Mommy’s not coming for you, Eli.” Demetri’s smirk widens. “Mommy’s getting drunk with all her friends to forget her unfulfilled suburban picket fence life with her nasty, violent delinquent of a son. And Mommy’s going to crash at Michelle Galinski’s house, just like she has every Friday night for the past 10 years. And oh dear…Daddy’s out of town on his top-of-the-month business trip? Looks like no one’s coming to save you.”

Fuck that. He can save himself.

Hawk makes a grab for Demetri’s wrist, other hand clawing at the arm compressing his chest. Demetri seamlessly lifts the elbow of his knife-holding arm and jabs the bony appendage into Hawk’s skin.

The knife blade doesn’t even falter, pressing more firmly into Hawk’s neck. A sting, and he feels something warm trickle toward his chest.

The scent from earlier intensifies, and Hawk realizes abruptly that it must have been blood.

“Mmmm-mmmm.” Demetri purses his lips and shakes his head, like he’s scolding a disobedient child. “It’ll make it much easier for both of us if you don’t act up. I really don’t want to cut your throat, but I will.”

As Demetri sneers down at him, Hawk realizes too late that he couldn’t cover his alarm.

“What? Don’t think I’d actually hurt you?”

The taller boy fiddles with the knife, sending little pricks of pain rippling through Hawk’s neck.

“I guess you know how it feels now,” he purrs.

Hawk spits in Demetri’s face, sudden fury overtaking him.

This pathetic nerd’s not going to make him feel bad now. Not after everything he’s done to crush the part of himself that possibly could feel bad.

“Fuck you.”

And slowly, never once breaking his gaze, Demetri licks Hawk’s saliva off his chin. The dim hallway light just catches the moisture on his face.

“Keep it in your pants, Moskowitz. We’re not there yet.”

Now Demetri’s definitely fucking with him.

It’s growing tiresome. Nonetheless, he doesn’t want that cut in his neck getting any wider.

There’s something distinctly unnerving about the way Demetri’s eyes are boring into him, sizing him up with a kind of cold contempt. Looking at him like he’s nothing more than some ugly insect to crush under his shoe.

It’s the sort of callousness that Hawk has never once—not in the entire time he’s known Demetri—been the target of.

And maybe he’ll admit it. He dislikes it for more than just the fact it throws him off.

Demetri is spiraling into someone unrecognizable, and the sheer foreignness of the whole process makes Hawk shudder.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?”

Hawk’s voice is small and weak. Like Eli’s.

He doesn’t care.

His entire sense of reality—every absolute, irrefutable truth he’s ever attached to himself and his life and his oldest friend—is uprooting and spinning out of control, and it’s not like anything fucking matters anymore.

Demetri laughs—a sharp, hollow sound devoid of any real humor.

“Like you’re one to talk. I know what you did to Brucks.”

Hawk’s blood freezes.

“Yeah, that’s right.” Demetri’s knife slides from the cut on Hawk’s neck, beginning to tease the underside of his chin. “Mitch told us what happened. And I damn well noticed when Brucks stopped showing up to school. Nice of your war criminal sensei to help you cover that up.”

Hawk’s breath comes in quick, short gasps.

Of course Demetri put two and two together. Of course he’d gone snooping so he could find something else to hang over Hawk’s head.

And the fall of that knife might be worse than the one currently tickling his jaw.

Part of him hates it. Hates being reminded of that day and hates being reminded what he’s capable of. Hates remembering the sight of a living, breathing person crumpling to the floor, and realizing they would never get up again.

But Hawk isn’t stupid. If anyone can play Demetri’s games, it’s the person who knows him better than anyone in the world.

“Demetri.” He keeps his tone as calm and non-abrasive as he can. “Who else’s blood is on your knife?”

Because it was still wet when Demetri shoved it up against him. And Demetri’s a moron if he thinks Hawk missed that.

“Ah. And we finally get to that.” Demetri chuckles, gently tracing Hawk’s jawline with the honed edge. “You see…the difference between you and me, Eli, is that I don’t need anyone’s help to hide my bodies.”

His heart drops to his feet.

“What did you do?”

“Not any worse than you.” Demetri cocks his head. “I hurt someone who deserved it.”

“Demetri.” Hawk steels his voice. “What did you do?”

Because whatever it was, Hawk sure as hell needs to take the proper precautions to make certain he isn’t next.

“Stopped at the convenience store on the way over here.” Demetri follows the knife with his eyes as he talks, expression almost affectionate. “Ran into one of Kyler’s old buddies from the wrestling team. One of the kids who used to call us fags, remember? He thought it would be fun to shove me around. So I pretended I was running my ass away, and got him to chase me somewhere a little more…private.”

Hawk gapes at him.

“Did you really…?”

“Shanked the asshole like a pig. He was so surprised he didn’t even fight back. And let me tell you, it was the most fun I’ve had in a while.”

And there’s that laugh again—the broken, disjointed chortles that feel so jarringly out-of-place. Green eyes shining with a frenetic light that makes Hawk’s hands grow slick with sweat.

Demetri leans in again, knife held steady as his lips brush Hawk’s ear.

“I know how it feels, you know. I know what it is to get so angry that you don’t even know what your body’s doing until it’s too late. Watch the life fade out of another human being’s eyes. Realize you like it. Sit there panicking about being some kind of inhuman monster and then suddenly realizing you don’t fucking care. And I suppose…I suppose that’s another reason you were right. There is a certain freedom in embracing that the world is cruel and cutthroat and unforgiving. In finally unmuzzling the wild animal thrashing around inside you and letting it hunt the way it was always meant to.”

Hawk shudders.

Sensei Kreese promised no one would ever find out about Brucks. Staged some kind of car accident or binge-drinking tragedy or drug OD or some other way stupid teenagers die all the time. Kyler was barred from the funeral, with Kreese worried (probably reasonably) that the dumbass would let something slip.

Kreese told the class that if anyone snitched, he’d be more than willing to look the other way as they met the same fate as Brucks.

Hawk hated how much he enjoyed it. He hated how after the deed was done, he couldn’t find a scrap of guilt in his psyche. It made him feel detached from himself—the abstract idea that doing that to another person was bad, but the complete lack of any emotions to back it up.

But that’s who he is now. No going back, he supposes.

Perhaps, on some level, he figured Demetri would pick up on this and leave him alone. Decide that Hawk’s path was too dark and too dangerous for his pasty basement nerd tastes, and stay huddled away with the Miyagi Dos singing kumbaya.

That would probably be best for him, anyways. Hawk still doesn’t know what other horrific shit he has it in him to do, especially when his victim pleaded so hard for mercy that would never come. When Brucks’ fruitless begging gave him an unmistakable rush.

And yet here Demetri is, claiming he was in a similar position. Claiming he lost control.

It isn’t that Demetri can’t put on an act if he needs to. But on some level, Hawk’s always been able to tell when his best friend is exaggerating or embellishing to make a story more interesting. There’s a kind of snarky undertone he uses, always giving that he isn’t completely serious. Subtle, but easy to pick up if you’re familiar with it.

There’s none of that here. If anything, this is the kind of emotional vulnerability Demetri never displays intentionally.

Until now, apparently.

Hawk bites his lip. “You’re not lying, are you?”

“You’re so cute.” The tip of the knife jabs into the underside of Hawk’s chin. “You thought I was some…what? Some sissy little do-gooder? The pinnacle of morality and mercy and all great virtues? No, no.” He giggles. “I’ve always been as fucked up as you. I only managed to keep it buried longer.”

Hawk scowls, suddenly remembering exactly who he’s talking to.

“Give me a fucking break. You joined the pussy-ass ‘defense only’ karate dojo. Your entire philosophy is about being sissy little do-gooders. Like you’d have the balls to pull even half the shit Cobra Kai—”

The knife flies back to the wound in his throat, Demetri using his arm to ram Hawk harder into the wall.

“You think I ever gave a flying fuck about Miyagi-Do?” he spits. “You think I’m some slavering pet like you, tripping over my little lapdog paws to appease my sensei’s every command? You think these asinine karate wars ever mattered to me? No.” He shoves his face into Hawk’s, blood on his breath. “You’re the one so obsessed with following orders that you can’t even remember who you were before you became some demented old man’s attack dog. You’re the one so drunk on loyalty to a fucking karate dojo that you can’t see none of this shit matters.”

Hawk bares his teeth, hoping with everything he has that Demetri won’t notice him shaking.

“Easy for you to say, when you pussied out after one punch in the face,” he sneered. “Of course you want to believe all of this is pointless when you’re on the losing team. But I’m not like you, Demetri. I’m no quitter.”

“Oh, how admirable.” The knife presses a little harder. “Tell me then, Hawk. How’s being on the same team as Kyler? As fucking Robby Keene? You excited for the chance to help them hurt Miguel again?”

Red-hot rage rips through Hawk. He lifts a leg and knees Demetri’s shin as hard as he can.

Demetri barely even winces. His other foot kicks up, ramming the side of Hawk’s knee. Hawk scrambles for balance, heart pounding as he just avoids falling into the knifepoint.

“Thought that’d hit a nerve.”

“Fuck you!” Hawk spits. “Keene was from your fucking dojo! You fought with him, too!”

“Not since he hurt Miguel.”

Demetri’s voice is frigid, rivaling the most biting winter rains. Every inch of him drips with a venomous hatred that Hawk has never seen before.

Not directed at him. Not directed at anyone.

“And now he’s in your dojo. Funny how that works.” Demetri clicks his tongue. “Guess your roaring rampage of revenge was all for naught.”

“It wasn’t.” Hawk curls his lip. “You were all responsible, and we got our paypack. It’s not our fault Miguel wasn’t grateful.”

“Ooooh, gotta love the Hawk’s impeccable logic! ‘Ah, yes, I think I will terrorize everyone in this dojo except for the person who actually almost killed my friend, who I will agree to team up with for some reason!’” Demetri returns his sneer. “Are you really such an obedient little bitch that you do whatever your precious sensei tells you? Even when you damn well know it makes no sense? You’re more pathetic than I thought.”

“Park and Keene know their place,” Hawk hisses. “They know I’m the alpha. They answer to me.”

Demetri cocks his head, looking amused.

“Even if I were to believe that. Do you like sharing a class with those assholes? Do you like knowing that if one of them were to get their ass handed to them by a Miyagi-Do or an Eagle Fang—by Miguel—that you’d be expected to rescue them?”

“I’d do it.” Hawk grits his teeth. “I wouldn’t like it, but I’d fucking do it. Sensei Kreese gave Sensei Lawrence and the others a chance to join back up with Cobra Kai, and they said no. Miguel chose his side.”

Demetri sighs, expression almost pitying.

“I guess ‘Cobra Kai for life’ trumps a Cobra’s desire to beat another Cobra into the damn ground. Kind of a shame. I think you’d enjoy hurting them.”

What Demetri said earlier circles back into his mind.

I avoid fights because I know who’s worth hurting.

Hawk straightens, keeping his composure.

“Sensei says we need all the allies we can get,” he says. “Even if we don’t like them. I’m putting up with Kyler and Robby long enough to win the tournament, and that’s it. Then I’ll find some way to weed them out.”

“I doubt it.” Demetri smiles down at him. If it weren’t for the knife, Hawk would punch his teeth in. “Contrary to how you act, I know you’re a smart guy. If you knew how to get rid of them, you would have already. No, Eli…” His voice drops to a purr. “You’re stuck with them, aren’t you?”

Hawk feels sick.

Leave it to Demetri to pinpoint his deepest fears—a karate clan filled with the worst people Hawk knew. Not a single friend to speak of, and a sensei with constantly divided attention.

Even Tory was turning out to be a fucking snake in the grass. She certainly took to the boy who nearly killed her ex with not an ounce of guilt.

And yet she believed with all of her being that Demetri deserved a broken arm for what Robby Keene did. That he was a pussy for crying out in pain. Actions didn’t matter to her—only the name branded across the merchandise you wore and the color of your gi at tournaments.

For the first time, the thought makes Hawk seethe.

All this time she’d seemed nothing but tough and fearless, but all she was was a shallow bitch who cared more about rank and status than a damn thing you actually did.

She was always going to hate Sam LaRusso for being rich and popular. She was always going to hate Miyagi Do for its association with LaRusso. But the second Keene bailed? Put on a belt with a cobra on it and showed off his snake-snatching skills?

She couldn’t wait to get on his dick. The filthy slut.

And suddenly Hawk realizes that he hates her, too. He hates so many of the people who are supposed to be his allies. But he can’t afford to think like that. And most of all, he can’t afford to let Demetri see it.

He glowers up at his ex-best-friend, keeping his gaze stony. “And why do you care? You have your posse of Miyagi losers to pal around with. Why do you give a shit what I do? Just go home to your little—”

“I left Miyagi-Do!”

The words come out in a forceful scream that practically knocks Hawk even further into the wall.

The sheer disdain in Demetri’s eyes for the group he had so cozily assimilated into sends Hawk reeling. He’d never—not in this lifetime or the next—expect Demetri to toss the whole lot of them out like garbage.

Demetri breaks into another grin, reveling in Hawk’s stunned silence.

“See, that’s another difference between you and I, Eli. I don’t need some washed-out old man telling me what to believe and how to fight. I can think for myself. And frankly, I got sick of the ‘safety in numbers’ business when it seemed ‘the numbers’ were always the ones who got to pick my enemies for me. And no one—” His eyes burn into Hawk. “No one decides that but me. I hurt who I like when I like, and I’ll fucking gut anyone who gets in my way.”

Hawk exhales slowly, keeping his scowl pulled tight.

“So…what?” Hawk sneers. “You’re going to fight Cobra Kai by yourself now? That’s so fucking stupid.”

“Not all of them. Some of your class are just brainwashed idiots who don’t know what they’re doing.” He sighs, shaking his head. “And you, Eli…well, I think you’ve lost sight of who your true enemy is. I was hoping I could help.”

“You really bounced?” Hawk narrows his eyes, still trying to make sense of everything. “After everything, you…just up and left?”

It can’t be that easy. He knows it wouldn’t be in Cobra Kai.

“Yeah.” Demetri shrugs. “And now I have way more time for important things.”

“I don’t get it.” Hawk’s frown deepens. “Why would you strike off on your own? Did something happen?”

“You happened.”

Short. Simple. Concise.

Completely baffling.

Not that that was anything new today.

Maybe it’s Hawk’s imagination, but the knife loosens a little.

“Don’t you get it?” For the first time all night, something like genuine anguish prods through Demetri’s voice. “I meant what I said. I never gave a rat’s ass about the karate wars, or the stupid dojo feuds. All I ever wanted was to be worth your fucking time again.”

All Hawk can do is stare.

It doesn’t make sense. None of this makes any fucking sense.

“And sure,” Demetri concedes after a moment. “At first, I wanted to do right by Mr. LaRusso. By Sam. They were the ones who taught me. Toughened me up into something worthwhile. Worked with all the shit you thought was a lost cause. But it was always a means to an end to stay relevant to you. Then after what happened with Moon, I genuinely thought the Miyagi-Do philosophy would help you. But I learned soon enough that you were in too deep for appealing to the Old Eli to work. No, I had to speak to you in your own language.”

He licks his lips as the knife starts to slide up Hawk’s neck again, dancing over the bottom of his chin and onto the plump skin of his lips.

“Aggression. Violence. Dominance.” He chuckles. “Wasn’t my go-to, but if it got your attention, I could make it work. And I guess I did, huh? I riled you up enough that you couldn’t leave me alone.”

“You wanted to piss me off?”

“If that’s what it took to keep you coming back for more.” And there it is again—that wide, sadistic grin that feels so brutally wrong. “You can leave me, Eli. You can disown me. You can shit on everything we had and make my life a living hell. But you can’t bring yourself to just ignore me. Because you’re so weak that you can’t bear to refuse the bait when I press your buttons. Because as much as you claim to hate me, you can’t move on from me.”

“And now you ditch your team to…what? Fight me on your own?” Hawk matches Demetri’s grin with one of his own. “I’d wreck you. And deep down, you know it.”

“So presumptuous.” Demetri shakes his head, tutting. “Frankly, I came here tonight because I’m sick of fighting you.”

“Says the one with a knife to my throat.”

“That’s because you don’t fucking listen without me having to resort to extreme measures,” Demetri hisses. “I think we’re a lot closer to being on the same page than you think. And maybe if you dropped this whole tribalism bullshit, you’d see that.”

So Demetri wants a truce. Hawk should have known.

He’s not surprised. But the way they arrived here?

Now that’s a twist.

It’s still an insane concept. Like he’s supposed to let his greatest enemy off the hook. Let Demetri get away with all the ways he’s undermined him and humiliated him and put the Old Eli—the weak, pathetic nerd Eli—on blast for all the world to see.

But if Demetri really left Miyagi Do…

Hawk finds himself wondering how much of his rage against the Miyagi Dos is his own, and how much is Sensei Kreese’s. And if Demetri’s truly deserted “the enemy,” does Hawk still have to hate him?

Does he even want to?

Demetri isn’t that pathetic, sniveling dweeb anymore. He’s crushed his old self as brutally as Hawk has.

Because the Demetri Hawk has known all his life could scarcely bring himself to cook with sharp knives, let alone use one to threaten another human being’s life.

Or take one.

But despite everything, something still doesn’t add up.

“I heard about your little rousing speech,” Hawk says. “About how important it was for Miyagi Do and Eagle Fang to unite against the ‘biggest assholes in the Valley.’ And now you’ve abandoned both of them. Was that all just a load of crap, then?”

Demetri is unfazed.

“Call me naïve, but I thought if Miguel and I were on the same team, you’d finally see some damn sense. You’d hurt me, sure. I’ve known that for a while. But I never thought you’d touch the kid you went on a vengeance quest for.” He shrugs. “Color me surprised when you wrote him off as just another enemy.”

“I told you.” Hawk works his fingers against the wall again, uneasiness trickling over his skin. “Miguel chose his side.”

“Be that as it may. I figured if you were so far gone that you were ready to wail on literally every person you used to be friends with, I needed to adjust my strategy.”

“For what?”

“For getting through to you. For getting you to tell the truth.”

And Hawk doesn’t want to think for too long about what truth Demetri has in mind.

“So you pull out a fucking knife.”

“Mhm.” Demetri snickers. “That’s how you communicate, yeah? Threats and intimidation?”

Hawk clenches his jaw. “I’m not scared of you.”

“Is that so.” The arm suddenly lifts from squeezing Hawk’s chest, long fingers seizing his wrist. He’s too surprised to pry them away.

He really should be expecting this kind of insane bullshit by now.

“Your pulse is going haywire, Eli,” Demetri murmurs. “Either you’re a liar, or something else has you energized. I wonder what that could be?”

It’s then Hawk’s mind fully catches up to its surroundings.

He rips his wrist away, pivoting away from the knife and sending a knee into Demetri’s ribs. The knife tip slices his cheek, but so be it. He’s endured worse.

Demetri gasps, stumbling back. Hawk makes a grab for the knife.

The taller boy is still too quick. He holds the weapon out of reach, using his other arm to thrust Hawk’s body back.

Before Demetri can do anything else, Hawk squats down and sweeps his leg. With a grunt, his opponent stumbles to the floor.

Something seizes Hawk’s ankles as he stands. He cries out as he’s yanked backward with surprising force, landing on the floor next to Demetri.

Hawk scrambles for the bed, trying to writhe out of Demetri’s grip and hoist himself up by the covers.

It’ll be over when I have the high ground.

What a stupid reference to think about.

It reminds him of the kind of game he and Demetri might have once played. Whoever made it onto the bed would get to be Obi-Wan, and whoever stayed on the floor would have to be Anakin, drowning in lava.

The idea leaves him feeling strange.

Demetri doesn’t let go, snarling like a hyena as he tries to tug Hawk back. The knife teases his skin, an imminent threat if he makes any moves too sudden.

He’d kick the annoying asshole away from him, but he doesn’t want the sole of his foot sliced open. If he can’t walk, he can’t fight.

Suddenly, Demetri cries out, grip loosening. In Hawk’s struggles, he must’ve rammed into a sensitive spot. He yanks himself free, scrambling onto the bed and frantically trying to plan his next move.

He realizes his mistake a half-second too late.

Demetri, gleefully bluffing, rises to his full height. Smirking, he pounces like a jaguar.

He lands heavily on Hawk’s stomach, slamming him against the bed. The back of his head smacks against the headboard, filling his vision with stars.

He barely has time to let out a pained gasp before Demetri’s knees are digging into his quadriceps, pinning him again. Growling, he aims a punch at Demetri’s throat.

His fist meets its target, pulling a strangled gasp. Hawk clasps his arms around Demetri’s torso, trying to thrust him off the bed.

For a moment they struggle, yanking and shoving wildly in an attempt to gain an advantage. Then Hawk feels long arms wrap around his back, bony fingers clutching at his throat.

The tingling pain of blade against skin, and Hawk realizes Demetri kept hold of his knife.

Whenever I think he’s finally going to drop that damned thing…

The knife jabs into him, strengthening its grip until he’s pressed flat on his back. At last Demetri loosens his grip, sizing up his victim with a satisfied beam.

Hawk squirms, bed creaking as he does his best to jostle Demetri off. The other boy holds fast, gazing down at him with a pitying look.

The blade digs in again, and Hawk’s struggles weaken.

“Come now. How many times do we have to go over this?”

“Let. Me. Go.”

“I don’t believe I was finished.”

Demetri tilts his head to the side, breaking into another crazed grin that sends dread trickling straight down to Hawk’s bones.

“Shut up Demetri.”

“I see you staring at me. All this time, and all these girls you tried so hard to fuck, and everything always comes back to your stupid middle school infatuation.”

“SHUT UP!”

Hawk squeezes his eyes shut, trying to bleach Demetri’s cold, smug expression from his mind.

“Right after you had your Bar Mitzvah, you asked me to kiss you. You figured since I already had mine, we were both adults now. And adults do grown-up things like kissing.”

“STOP IT!”

And suddenly Hawk is screaming at the top of his lungs because he knows where this is going. Because they were just stupid kids, and that can’t mean anything.

“I said of course I would, because I’d always liked you, Eli.” Demetri’s voice only grows louder—more insistent. “And I go in to give you a peck, and you grab my arms and stick your entire tongue in my mouth.”

“Shut the fuck up, Demetri!”

He feels something wet dribbling down his face, and wonders if the cut on his cheek got stretched wider in his and Demetri’s scuffle. It’s certainly stinging enough for it.

Unless…

Hawk wishes he could dissolve.

“I told you I’d kiss you a thousand more times if you wanted.” Demetri’s voice has grown sharper than his blade. “And I would have. And for a long while, I thought there might be the most infinitesimal possibility that you felt something, too. Now I know I was right.”

He laughs, the sound acrid and bitter and full of flint.

“Because even after everything, you’re still obsessed with me. You watch me across the lunchroom and pretend you’re ‘monitoring the enemy,’ but I know you miss me. You miss when I made you laugh, and you miss when I talked to people so you didn’t have to. You chase me around in every battle, but when it comes right down to it, you can’t hurt me in any significant way until you’re bullied into it. You pick fights with me so you can put your hands all over my body and not have anyone look at you askance for it.”

“FUCK YOU!”

Maybe if he screams loud enough, Demetri won’t pay too much attention to the wet trails smearing the blood from his cuts.

Caustic breath is hovering inches above Hawk, misting onto his lips. Still, he refuses to open his eyes.

“It must be exhausting, you know,” Demetri whispers. “Living your life in denial like that. Wearing your entire personality like some cheap Halloween costume and convincing yourself that’s a fulfilling existence. Don’t you want to be free?”

“I’m not hiding anything,” Hawk growls. “I do whatever I like. It’s not my fault you don’t like who I really am.”

“Who you really are, hmmm?” Demetri’s lips brush his earlobe, voice a barely-audible murmur. “So tell me the truth then, Eli. Do you still want me?”

The bluntness of the question almost blows a hole in his composure.

“Of course I don’t.”

“Stop fucking lying!”

All at once, Demetri’s voice is a deafening, furious scream again. The knife slices Hawk’s jaw.

Not enough to do any real harm, but enough to really hurt. Hawk freezes, held prisoner by the burst of sharp, sudden pain.

“It’s always lies, lies, lies with you,” Demetri snarls. “Fake name. Fake hair color. Fake personality. Fake interests. Fake friends who only kiss the ground you walk on because they’ve never seen you at your weakest. Fake relationships with girls you barely let know you—to the point you think they’d leave you for liking to code. And the absolute drivel you feed yourself that this goddamn farce is what you want to live in forever. You think you’re starring in some martial arts epic, and you’re so wrapped up in your stupid method acting that you never want to step offscreen. Like everyone’s on the edge of their seat about your pitiful life like it’s the fucking Truman Show. And at the end of the day? You’re still too much of a pussy to tell me the truth.”

Hawk’s skin tingles, shivers rippling through him. If his heart was pounding before, it’s thundering now.

Somehow it doesn’t feel like fear. He’s used to this new version of Demetri enough not to cower from him.

No, it’s something far worse. And Demetri knows it.

“You can’t hide from me.” The other boy’s tone drips with haughtiness, savoring the ability to confirm Hawk’s worst fears. “I see right through your bullshit. I always have. So I’ll ask you one more time. Do you want me?”

The knife slides down to Hawk’s throat again, pressing firmly.

“Lie and I’ll kill you.”

He’s probably bluffing. Maybe. Surely.

Perhaps it doesn’t matter anymore. Sprawled out on his childhood bed, underneath the only other person he frequently shared it with.

The person he used to watch sleep, wondering wistfully if the freak with the lip scar ever made it into his best friend’s dreams.

He opens his eyes and finally meets Demetri’s gaze, in all of its searing, insurmountable beauty.

“Yeah.”

He breathes it out quiet and fragile—a soft promise. A rare moment of openness that he lets free of his unbreakable shell.

Demetri drops the knife. It falls behind the bed, thumping onto the carpet below.

He swoops down, seizing Hawk’s neck and yanking him up. When their mouths meet, Hawk is nearly thrown back with the force of it.

Demetri kisses like a starved animal, lapping and nipping in a crazed frenzy. The weight of his muscle-toned body is crushing, locking Hawk firmly against the mattress.

He tastes like blood and cold steel and cruelty. Hawk shudders.

This time, he’s certain it isn’t fear. It’s a rush he only thought he could get from smashing his fists against plastic or skin, or feeling another person’s body go limp and lifeless underneath his.

And it’s ironic. The more Demetri tries to devour Hawk, the more Hawk wants to let it happen.

There’s an odd satisfaction to it, he thinks. Being completely at someone else’s mercy.

And Demetri isn’t fighting with any.

***

OKAY, time for some #authorrants because I feel like some of the choices I made in this fic are. Controversial, to say the least. Lmao.

So something that has bugged the crap out of me for a while now is people in this fandom acting like there is any world where Demetri would choose Robby over Miguel. I remember after S3 dropped, there was a lot of "dId tHeY fOrGeT tHe dEmEtRi-rObBy FrIeNdShIp" type sentiment floating around irt why Demetri didn't stay in contact with Robby the way Sam and the LaRussos did. Maybe it's because, I don't know, Robby threw the guy Demetri never actually stopped being close friends with over a balcony and almost killed him???

Like. Not that these showrunners don't ever forget things, but this absolutely is not one of them. Robby paralyzing Miguel is a BEYOND valid reason to sever ties with him, especially when you were just casual dojo bros for a couple months tops. When push came to shove, Demetri pretty unequivocally CHOSE MIGUEL. He brought him a comic book in the hospital! He was thrilled to see him back at school and picked up their friendship right where it left off! He DOES NOT VISIBLY FORGIVE ROBBY UNTIL MIGUEL DOES! Idk idk it just really riles me when people do not take Demetri and Miguel's friendship into account when discussing the Demetri-Robby relationship and why they stopped being friends when they did. Tbh I don't think it's that hot of a take to assume Demetri would have more loyalty to the guy who befriended him when he was a nobody and proceeded to be one of his closest ride-or-die friends for a whole-ass year over the guy he was casual buds with because they happened to share a karate instructor -_____- I could go on about this for several more paragraphs, but that's a rant for another day.

(As far as the LaRussos go, they were all closer to Robby and were basically his adoptive family, which is why they--particularly Sam--were willing to give him the benefit of the doubt and say the Miguel thing was an accident. Demetri didn't know Robby well enough to make that call, and had no actual proof it WAS an accident except for maybe Sam's word.)

Some other things to ramble about:

I remember in some interview a while back (I think with Martin Kove?) someone asked about Hawk and Marty or whoever was being interviewed said he was "on his way to being a serial killer" or smth. And Jacob's talked a little bit about the kind of escalating delinquent shit Hawk would get up to if he was never redeemed, etc. So going with that: Bold of y'all to assume the kid simping for Hawk since episode 1 wouldn't renounce his morals and join him on the path to villainy. Sorry but I truly believe Demetri's horniness for Hawk can and would win out over any ethical qualms in the end. Also Demetri is horny for violence and evil this is canon otherwise he would in fact not have simped for S3 Hawk so PAINFULLY BADLY god bless

Also this was partly inspired by those post-S3 jokes that were like "lol what happened to Brucks??? Did Hawk kill him???"...well, what if he did, tho? O_____O

Disclaimer that I promise I do not endorse the Tory slut-shaming!!! Tbh I didn't really wanna write it, but...I think given the circumstances, Hawk WOULD be pretty furious at her for getting chummy with Robby and "betraying" Miguel. And unfortunately, since he's a teenage boy with (canonical!) misogynistic tendencies...I do think that would most likely come across as slut-shaming D: But y'all have brains y'all know I don't condone everything I write about aknhdksuyhf (Murder is probably not something you should try at home either btw)

Hopefully I didn't make Hawk too weaksauce in this ^^; My excuses are a) I suck at writing fight scenes and tend to just want to get to the psychosexual dialogue and knife-teasing, so. If I rushed anything to get there I apologize. b) Going by the school fight, Hawk is indeed thrown off when Demetri takes the offensive (especially in a super dramatic kind of way) and his confused pause is in fact enough time for Demetri to get an advantage and c) The man is thrown off his game!!! Thrown off his groove, even!!! His sissy pussy nerd ex-friend shows up acting like a disturbed maniac and he is so O_____o about it that his moves are off!!! He's sucking a little but it's not his fault 💔It's Demetri's for subverting expectations 💔

I also feel like if Demetri started McFucking Losing It and was generally less grounded in the physical and rational world, physical pain wouldn't register quite as much. Like he's in his head enough now that he's kinda lost his grip on reality and things happening in the physical world don't seem as relevant or immediate, if that makes any sense? Also idk. Maybe after the arm break his pain tolerance just went up :O Anyways that's why he recovers pretty fast when Hawk DOES land a hit. Demetri is nuts now 💙

I will die on my hill that Demetri like. Really REALLY isn't as morally upstanding as people like to think XD Like I say this with love but from the top he's been a self-interested little shit who just happens to be extremely loyal to the very small handful of people he actually likes. My dudes, he didn't join Miyagi Do because he liked their philosophy better--he joined because they were less on board with punching him in particular in the face XD This dude saw Cobra Kai being fucks and playing dirty at the AVT and he STILL up and says "I wanna come back because I like the 'safety in numbers' aspect of joining a gang" XD I always got the vibe the "well at least I'm not an asshole LIKE YOU" he throws at Eli later is more because he likes to feel self-righteous. I say all of this as his biggest fan btw. I think more people should embrace the self-interested king he is and write about him and Eli being absolute dicks together instead of to each other 💖

I guess that's what I'm here for!!!

Anyways I think Demetri and Eli have the same potential to be absolutely horrific people, and I think we're all very lucky that Demetri was too lazy to challenge his comfort zone and stick with Cobra Kai XD We're very fortunate he happened to end up using his speed and his brains to help his friends who happened to be on the Good Guy Side rather than his friends who happened to be on the Bad Guy Side.

I also think people put WAY too much stock in Demetri's ability to staunchly stick with the good guys and have enough of a moral backbone to just keep opposing Eli's douchebaggery indefinitely. My mans is NOT that much of a saint, trust. From how quickly he forgave Eli for a HUGE number of atrocities, he seemed to be like. Waiting on his ass for Eli to come back to him. And if Eli never did???

I mean. Bruh. Someone you've been deeply in love with for years throws you out like last night's trash and just progressively starts being more and more awful to you??? You think it's feasible for my boy Demetri to stay strong and sane and reasonable forever, and just keep on fighting the good fight??? HELL NO. This dude is either a) quitting karate and moving schools so he doesn't have to deal with constantly being pummeled by the dude he's in love with or b) going completely fucking insane from the cognitive dissonance of being in love with a dude who constantly beats his ass.

Listen. I have been in love. If my friend who I was in love with turned evil and joined an evil karate school and started wailing on me all the time, I would either pull an Aisha and haul ass out of there or I would simply lose my mind and become evil. Go full Jinx from Arcane. Sorry if you're a hater who doesn't think Demetri Alexopoulos has it in him to go apeshit, but you're wrong and also boring. The funny kooky comic relief guys are always one thread away from losing their shit because everyone assumes because they're funny and kooky they have no depth and no end to their bullshit tolerance. I would know because I am one of these Guys in real life. Put some respecc on my boy's name and also give him another knife 🔪

For anyone looking at me askance like "Demetri doesn't have it in him to kill!" Yes he does. I'm sending him over to your house to stab you right now 🩵

No fr tho, like there was MURDER in this man's eyes when Kyler was bullying Eli in the library. There was MURDER in this man's eyes fighting Robby at the AVT in S4. I have full confidence that if he could get away with stabbing his enemies, he would. So would Eli but I feel like this is a less contested opinion.

Also this is interesting so it's something I might go into detail about in another post, but one thing I noticed while kinda brainstorming how Demetri would snap is that Demetri is loyal to people, while Eli is loyal to concepts and ideas.

Demetri I don't think is actually that married to or slavish about MD principles tbh. Demetri isn't really averse to violence conceptually (even back in S1 it's only ever about him disliking BEING hit, not disliking hitting people!!) and doesn't actually do the defense-only thing that often. Several times we see him instigate with Hawk, or help Sam instigate with CK in general. The times we see him stick his neck out to really help Miyagi Do, he seems like he's doing so more out of loyalty to his friends (namely Sam, Chris, and Nate--also Miguel irt the dojo team-up at the end of S3) than loyalty to Miyagi Do as a dojo.

Eli, meanwhile, is way more loyal to concepts he puts a lot of stock in than the people in his life who challenge this. He sees Cobra Kai as this almighty saving grace that is for LIFE, and he doesn't think twice about ditching Demetri and Miguel when they turn their backs on it. He stays in this dojo even as his friends leave and it fills up with people he hates, and his sensei dismisses and ignores his concerns. Because this dojo saved him from his horrible, bullied life, and now he feels like he owes everything to the Cobra Kai name, despite who's actually behind the name. Also why I think Demetri uses "my karate dojo needs your help!" as the selling point to get Eli to join MD in S4. HIS motivation is probably much more that he just wants him and Eli to stay together, but he knows Eli values dojo loyalty above everything, so Dem kinda makes it more about that than friendship.

Anyways! That's all for now! The whole fic should be up on my AO3 sometime in December :3

[animentality]

I'm planning out an Honour mode run(which will also be origin Astarion run) and I was wondering if you have any tips for it? All my characters will be multiclassers and I'm planning which weapons and armor to use, but I'm just curious what someone with probably one thousand hours in the game thinks could help

Ironically, I just this week beat the Honor Mode with a friend of mine, hee hee.

Alright, so here goes!

My Personal Team Comp

Paladin/Fighter (My buddy)

Paladin/Fighter (Astarion at first, Minthara later)

Storm Sorcerer (Karlach for me but it could be anyone, really, I was just trying to get the dating achievement- Karlach is actually a terrible Sorcerer because her race gives her smite spells...which she can't use effectively, as a staff user...)

Ranger/ Rogue/ Fighter (Me)

Reasoning:

Two frontliners is always good, to keep the aggro off of the squishier half of the party. Plus, the melee classes get to hit multiple times, which is just, insanely good, and lets you destroy targets. Paladin is obviously the most broken class, but a Paladin Fighter is a great multi class for Action Surge and Battle Maneuvers! Make sure to grab Disarming Attack and prioritize stealing weapons so enemies can't hit you very hard anymore!

You might want to have some kind of Rogue, for sneak attack, and disengage potential as well! Good for long range picks, and quick killing of high priority targets. Plus, two frontliners make it so you always have advantage.

And you of course need an AOE spellcaster of some kind. I think the Warlock is pretty powerful, mostly because of Eldritch Blast and Hunger of Hadar cheese, but the Sorcerer is the strongest magic caster with all their excellent Metamagic passives. They can also regain a lot of spell slots and have a ridiculous DPS output. But Hunger of Hadar is an excellent spell; it is without question the BEST AOE spell in the game.

The key to beating BG3 in any mode is to make distance.

Force your enemies through tight choke points stuffed with magical obstacles and just pick them off as they try to get through.

Hunger of Hadar is broken because not only are they blind, but they're also SLOWED and you get ADVANTAGE on them when they're in it, AND it does damage, AND as I mentioned before, you can throw them back INTO it when they try to get out with Eldritch Blast, which is also just excellent for throwing enemies away from you.

So Sorcerer or Warlock are excellent choices, but I personally have more of an affinity for Sorcerer.

Now.

Why Storm Sorceror specifically?

Because they get the best passives. People say Draco Sorcerers are the best, but their passive is only helpful early on. The Storm Sorcerer passive lets you cast FLY as a bonus action every time you use a level 1 or higher spell! The disengage potential is critical for Honor Mode, plus it's great for just repositioning whenever you want. Plus you get excellent passives like Heart of the Storm, AND you get immunity to multiple damage types, instead of just one!

Why the Ranger/Rogue/Fighter?

Check out this guy's comp, which I used. It is insanely powerful.

You can dual wield two one handed crossbows, and just SHRED everything you come across.

I was literally playing with two paladins and I WAS HITTING HARDER THAN THEM.

Ranger gives you dread ambusher, then you can hit TWICE as a melee class, which the Rogue doesn't get, and then you can get Action Surge, and do it all over again, PLUS as a thief subclass, you have two bonus actions, for your offhand attacks!

It's honestly broken as fuck, and it's perfect for the long range, disengage potential.

Now you have my suggested comp. Keep in mind that you can have just about anything you want, but remember, two frontliners, at least one magic caster with dps potential, and then the fourth should ideally be a long range specialist.

Now then...

I recommend you pick the Dark Urge.

Why?

For a million reasons.

It is MUCH easier to 1v1 Orin in the end rather than kill the whole Temple and deal with her bullshit Unstoppable nonsense.

You want the deathstalker mantle, which is insanely good for rogues, and everything in general

You WANT To kill Isobel so you can have the Slayer Form, which will get you out of tight spots, plus it makes Orin even easier to deal with.

You also want access to Bhaalist armor for accepting Bhaal as your master.

Also, you want to accept Bhaal so you can get Power Word Kill, a very useful one time use ability, which can uh, hint hint, be used on the Netherbrain to end the game very quickly

You also want to have the Bhaalist buff, which helps you crit more during the final battle.

But this now segues into...

Equipment

Now, if you're the Dark Urge...do not kill Alfira.

Knock her out every day in Act 1 until Quil Grootslang takes her place!

You want the robe Alfira will give you in Act 2 for saving the tieflings from Moonrise! It's called the Potent Robe and it's GREAT for sorcerers! But you can have both it AND the Deathstalker mantle so long as you're vigilant and knock her out every day!

Just be careful, because Arron will kill you if he catches you! So try to knock her out in one hit, if you can. Put the game in turn based mode, if you must! Or use sneak attack.

Other equipment:

Spellsparkler! Insanely broken for Sorcerers and magic missile users. You can use it till the end of the game.

Make sure to get the staff Lorroakan is hoarding inside Sorcerous Sundries! It gives you Kereshka's Favor, which is excellent for Storm Sorcerers.

Also make sure your final feat as a Sorcerer is Dual Wielding, because if you dual wield that staff AND Cazador's staff, you get the abilities of both staffs! You can also use something other than Cazador's staff, and use Arcane Battery twice! So you can cast something ridiculous like, say, Disintegrate, more times than should be allowed! Also, there are like, two amulets and one staff that will allow you to regain spell slots! Make sure to gather as many as you can. Sorry I can't name them off the top of my head... I know one is a pearl necklace that you can buy from Omeluum, one is Caitlin's staff, and the other one you can get from the Warden in Moonrise...make sure to grab them so you can restore spell slots. Oh, also, if you do the House of Hope...you can grab the staff that's in his secret treasure room! Which is also great.

Make sure to buy the Risky Ring from Araj! It gives you advantage on EVERY attack, it just also gives you disadvantage on all saving throws...but if you give it to a rogue, and they have the deathstalker mantle, then they don't have to worrry about being hit ever, lol, plus they have sneak attack ALWAYS. no allies next to enemies required!!! it's a broken item, so definitely grab it from Araj in Act 2!

If you have two heavy armor wearers, use the mold from the Grymforge Heavy Scale mail twice. Make sure to then replace one of them with Ketheric armor later on.

You also want the aformentioned Bhaalist equipment. The Bhaalist amulet is great, as is the Bhaalist armor you can buy from the dragon seller in Sarevok's chamber.

Speaking of Sarevok, kill his ass! You want his excellent sword and helmet.

If you're feeling brave, kill Ansur too, because his helmet is awesome, as is his sword, but be careful! That lightning bitch is an honor mode run killer! I've almost lost two runs to him.

Even though he's hard, I do recommend killing Raphael! The Constitution amulet, the gauntlets of hill giant strength, and the staff in his treasure room are really worth it.

And uh.

Yeah!

Good luck!

Let me know if you have any more specific questions, and trust me.

I know...way too much about this game.

But this is just my starting guide!!

I had a blast in Honor Mode, I bet you will too!

Oh.

And don't kill Gortash. Not because he's my boyfriend or anything, but because, he's not really worth fighting, especially not for the loot he gives you!

If you must kill him, do it at the Morphic Pool instead of Wyrm's Rock!!!

[toooster]

One of a Kind. | Criminal Minds AU| Chapter 5

Summary: I don’t want to write one 😪

Warnings: SA! Rape! Sexist cop! Swearing/cussing! Jackie Santori!

Words: 1.8k

A/n: this chapter is heavily based on that one episode in either the end of season two or start of season 3, (I don’t remember) which is why the warnings are there. Also I think this is the quickest I’ve updated in a while..in the middle of writing this I started crying and had to stop- so that’s why it took longer 😭

The new case was located in a city all too familiar to Aaliyah, the moment Spencer woke her up, her heart started racing.

What if she saw his mother? What if she saw his father? What if she saw his sisters? A million questions flooded into her head, making her heart pound.

Spencer, Derek, Emily, and Aaliyah all went to the victims house while JJ, Hotch, and Rossi went to the precinct.

About 20 minutes passed before Aaliyah noticed they were pulling into the victims neighborhood. Brookdale , why did that sound so familiar?

I stepped out of the SUV with Emily close behind me, the boys had already approached the door, waiting for us to join them.

After about 3 knocks the door opened to reveal a sweet looking older lady, about 75. She looked at me with a shocked expression, almost like she knew who I was.

Morgan started talking to her while I took a minute to scan my surroundings. Then I saw it. The big sign with Joey's face on it, that read "Live Like Joey Santori. #LLJS"

My heart sunk to my toes.

I was currently standing at the neighbor's house of my dead boyfriend's childhood home. "You coming?" Reid asked me as I stood there, almost as if I couldn't move.

I snapped out of it and walked in with Reid, the older woman sat on the couch as Morgan and Emily spoke to her. Every now and then she'd give me a look, like she was begging me to save her from all of this.

I'd give her sympathetic looks and then nod to whatever either of them had said, it continued like that for about 15 minutes before we got back in the car and headed towards the precinct.

As we walked through the doors, the smelled of strong, cheap cologne filled my nostrils. It smelt like high school all over again.

I sat down with one of the officers as we started looking through evidence, "so which one did you sleep with the get here?" He snorted, "excuse me?" I asked with disgust in my tone.

I was hoping I hadn't heard him right. "You heard me, a pretty girl like you doesn't just make her way to the BAU." He responded with another snort. "Ok Kermit, here's what we're not gonna do, make sexist jokes. I'm here because I worked my ass off, that's more than you can say, officer scoller." And with that I walked off.

If I hadn't, I probably would've slammed his head into a wall, what's with men lately I thought to myself. I dread for the day that Avi has to deal with this.

I'd only been in page for a couple hours, yet I was still waiting for the news that we could go home.

So far we knew nothing about our unsub or our victims. We had two 30 year old males, dead, missing their junk and hands. I could already tell this was going to be an interesting case.

"Where do we go from here? We've got nothing, no finger prints, nothin." Scoller huffed. Oh how I wish this unsub would take him too.

"We interview anyone who worked around the time the bodies were dropped, they were dropped in an Alley surrounded by bars, shops, and restaurants. Some had to of seen our unsub." Rossi spoke, "Our unsub is most likely a female, possibly a history of being sexual assaulted or raped." I added, "Why take their penises though?" Another officer asked, "It's a sign." Reid explained, "In cases like this, most women do it to show that they can't hurt anyone anymore."

"Hunt, your from around here right?" Hotch asked as everyone started to dismiss, "Yes, unfortunately." I replied. "Great. Take Reid with you to the crime scene, talk to anyone who might've seen a woman talking up guys." "Got it. Let's go Reid!" I yelled as I grabbed my keys.

The car ride was silent, which was unusual for Reid. He was always yapping about something, but it was a comfortable silence.

"We're here." I told Reid as I opened my car door, revealing cigarette buds all over the asphalt. Ew. I thought to myself as I stepped out of the car.

Reid followed me into a nearby bar, I could feel his breath on the back of my neck. I could also hear his heartbeat going a mile a minute, why was he so nervous? I thought.

We walked to the bar, only to be welcomed by the worst sight ever. "Well what a surprise? You finally bring my grandbabies? Oh I hope you didn't bring them in this bar!" Jackie hissed.

"No and no. I'm here for work, so I need you to move." I hissed back at her, "Why can't you ever be kind? Who's this handsome young man? New boy you?" She asked, playing with Reid's tie.

I was quick to ripped it out of her hands, "No. Jackie, leave it. Have a nice day." I said as I pulled Reid by his tie towards the nearest bartender.

"Who was that?" Reid asked me as he smoothed his tie, "don't worry about it." I responded. "Hi. I'm Agent Hunt, this is Dr.Reid," I explained as I flashed my badge, "Was there a woman in your bar, around a week ago?" I asked, "she would've been flirtatious, any man that gave her the light of day she'd talk to. Short or tall, Attractive or not." Reid added.

"That's pretty much every chick that steps into this bar. Most women come here to get laid, so they take anyone." The bartender told us, "She would've been very provocative, even going as far as giving men money." I explained again.

"Now that you say that, there was this one girl. Real petite little thing, only about 4'9? Maybe 115 pounds? Brown hair, green eyes. She was hitting on all of us. I'm not even sure she was 21. She had a stack of cash in her bra, I guess guys found it attractive." "Great thank you. Is the bouncer that was there that night, here?" I asked.

"One sec, Gary! Is Buddy here?" He yelled towards the back of the bar, "Yeah, he's out back smoking a cigar." The man who I presume was Gary responded.

Reid and I went out back to talk to Buddy, only to find a 5'6 man with a bushy beard smoking a cigar. "I thought he'd be bigger.." I whispered to Reid.

"You buddy?" Reid asked, "yes sir. How can I help ya?" "We need to know the name of a girl that was here like Thursday." "Alrighty." he responded, "she was around 4'9, about 115 pounds. She had brown hair and green eyes, very flirty." I said as I read off of Reid's notebook.

"Oh ya! Uh Rosemary..uh Gomez?" He said slightly wary, "thank you." I responded before heading back to the car, Reid close behind.

As soon as the two got in the car Reid called Hotch to let him know what they'd found out. "Good work you two. I'll have Garcia send you and address so you can bring her in." Hotch said as he hung up the phone.

It only took Garcia about 5 minutes to find Rosemary’s address and give it to us.

We pulled up to her house, it was small and cute. Had a cute little welcome sign on the front door, little motivational rocks spread throughout the garden. If she hadn’t cut off a dudes penis I would’ve thought she was the sweetest person ever.

*knock lnock* “Can I help you?” The girl asked, she looked exactly like how they’d described her. “Hi, I’m Dr.Reid, this is Agent Hunt. We’re with the FBI. We need to speak with you.” As soon as it left Reid’s mouth she bolted.

“Damnit!” I yelled as I pushed the door out of my way and took after her, she wasn’t very fast. I tackled her to the ground and threw the handcuffs on her.

“Why’d you have to make it harder than it has to be?” I hissed at her as I yanked her up from the ground.

We headed back to the precinct, as she yelled and cussed us out the whole ride.

When we got back to the precinct I was insistent on interrogating Rosemary, Hotch didn’t like the idea but I felt she’d be more comfortable with a female if my hunch was right.

I started pacing the room as I put my hands on my hip. “You grew up in a single parent home, most likely only your father was present. You often craved male validation due to the fact your father never gave it to you, yet when you get said male validation you start to view the men as objects. Like once was done to you,” I stated, “you were raped or sexually assaulted by a male, most likely older. Any older male you see who reminds you of the man who did this to you, makes your blood boil. Which started the killings, you started getting validation form the killings, cutting off their genitals gave you a since of comfort. Knowing they couldn’t hurt anyone..yet they weren’t the ones who did it to you. Meaning the men or..man who did it to you is either dead or far far away.” I continued on.

She sat in front of me and stared blankly at the wall, she had tears welding in her eyes. Any moment she would break, and I knew that. So I kept going.

“You decided a long time ago not to have children, because the idea of a man..doing that to you again, even with consent made your skin crawl. The meer thought of having a son disgusted you.” I watched as she started to break down.

I had her right where I wanted her, “I’m right, aren’t I?” I asked her. “Stop it!” She yelled as she slammed her fist onto the table, “please just stop!” She begged.

“Is that what those men begged of you while you took away their manhood?” I questioned, she sobbed in front of me. I almost felt bad for her.

“I had to!” She confessed, “they would hurt other girls if I didn’t!” She yelled in between sobs. “They weren’t the ones who did it to you and you knew that! Those were innocent men! I mean killing your rapist I can understand but killing random men who did nothing is sickening.” I spoke with disgust lacing my voice, make sure she could hear it.

And with that I was done, but it was easy. Too easy almost. “Good job Hunt. That was scary, I’ll admit.” Morgan said as he patted me on the back, “what’s wrong?” Emily asked as she walked up behind me.

“I can’t help but feel bad for her..she went through so much. She was trapped in this cycle. She saw every man as her rapist, it was never ending for her.” “Yeah I understand. Unfortunately this is part of the job.” Emily said as she rubbed my back and walked off.