#I can hold a grudge if i want to I can be childish if I want to
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Nothing like the feeling when you feel like you're supposed to be productive but there's not really much you can do so you just sit back and simmer in your inferiority complex and contemplate the fact that grades really are more of an arbitrary method of judgement in a way certainly influenced by personal bias and the teachers mood and opinions and the students day and overall mental state and that they really say nothing about a students abilities and capabilities and even if my teacher told me i produce a slodge of unhelpful wordmaterial that doesn't mean I suck at the english language and am incapable if bringing things to the, to put it in her words, " 'points' which are often repetitive" with my limited analytic vocabulary. As if the grasp I have on the english language isn't at least native level. As if I'm not perfectly capable of being short and concise. Just because I'm not the best at interpreting short stories and mark my quotations wrong which, I might add! wouldn't be a bloody issue if they actually told you what to do different when they correct their blasted rigged exams. But yeah sure me not revising is the issue.
#still bitter about that it happened this morning it's yesterdays snow but I'm still bitter that#I can hold a grudge if i want to I can be childish if I want to#and right now I want to#can't even be too mad she does have a point I suppose in my lacking structure#but one could've been nicer in saying it is all...#"Tip: Maybe pause to think about the words before writing them down'' Okay thanks fuck you as well I suppose#that's an actual quote btw not paraphrasing she wrote that#not even the grade I take issue with the grade is not the best but I can live with it I've had worse grades in my day#but those quips genuinely did offend me I must say#no reason to be so brutal with it... I appreciate the feedback but good god madam have some mercy with me will you#but I get it I do get it I see the point I do really but still. This is what it takes to better onesself yadda yadda#but I really can't say I don't feel at least a little personally offended by that#what a bother. Been back in school one day and I already yearn for the next break#it was a short story interpretation too all I did my entire life was poems in german#but I'm old enough to have managed that on my own by now to be fair that one's on me#hmm. feeling a tad miffed now#I say this won't do I have better things to spend my time with
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NAKSHATRA SERIES: OBSERVATION FROM DIFFERENT NAKSHATRAS
disclaimer: all of my observations comes from my observations on celebrities and my social circle who has this nakshatras. if you're offended just block me mwah 💋💋💋
ANURADHA
One of the most intelligent nakshatras that I know. Some would say that Saturn-ruled nakshatra comes from hard work, but may I add the intelligence in that.
Most of the time, I see this as an academically intelligent nakshatra for me.
(Unevolved) Anuradha women that I know are "pick me" girls. The Pick me definition of "they're like no other girls" and would do anything for men's attention.
Out of all the Saturn Vimshottari ruled nakshatras, this one has light-hearted vibes compared to Pushya and Uttara Bhadrapada, despite being the debilitation of the moon.
They hold grudges just like the sidereal waters would do, but the reason why Mars is debilitated in Cancer is that the anger that Cancer harbors is more detrimental to them, unlike in Scorpio. Yes, they will harbor anger, but they use that as motivation, and they are not "stuck" towards the past. Also, their approach to the problem is better than that of Cancer, which is passive aggressiveness.
They're more into connections and friends really. If you have an Anuradha friend, They're really great and loyal.
JYESTHA
The characteristics I notice of Jyestha are strategic in life and their goals. Most of them have it.
When you're literally in a competition and your opponent is Jyestha. (ANY COMPETITION)
The deity of this nakshatra is Indra. No wonder they're literally on the top (besides Magha).
Weakness of this nakshatra? Ego and pride. To a certain extent, they're literally prone to sabotaging because of arrogance and being boastful. Most of us would agree that they're on the top, but they can attract enemies more than anyone.
f you want a guru/mentor about life (or skills in general), go to Jyestha!!!! They're literally OVERACHIEVERS!!
Jyestha natives, how can you all be so mature and childish at the same time?? I can't explain it, but you can observe this with your Jyestha friends/family
They have ties with the organ/piano instrument. Like the actor who played Davy Jones, who is a Jyestha sun.
MULA
You know how some nakshatras are so different yet also alike at the same time? Yes, I'm talking about Gandanta nakshatras (Revati - Ashwini, Ashlesha - Magha, and Jyestha - Mula).
Jyestha and Mula share characteristics that are the same for me: - The females I know are into spirituality (astrology, tarot, etc.). - They're both BLUNT and CUTTHROAT, especially the men with this nakshatra. - The billionaire nakshatras. Many rich people have Jyestha and/or Mula nakshatra. The difference is Mula is preachy (tied to Sagittarius rashi) while Jyestha is more factual or shares trivia.
Fun fact, Pope Francis has Mula sun. You know? Jupiter (Sagittarius ruled planet) tied to religion, beliefs, teaching, etc.
Ironically, Mula nakshatra (UNEVOLVED) are some of the unethical people that I know (personally and celebrity-wise). Jupiter + Ketu correlation. (Mastery towards wealth and expansion (Jupiter) and detachment of ethics/unhinged beliefs (Ketu))
In terms of animals, they really are the true animal lovers out there.
I've seen many Mula and Krittika nakshatra couples lately. I wonder why, and I haven't really an explanation for this.
Out of all the Ketu-ruled nakshatras, this one is consistent for portraying gay people, even though they're straight (Billie Eilish, Maya Hawk), especially women with this placement.
Purva Ashadha
Sidereal Sagittarius are preachy including this nakshatra!!!!!!
They're using humour to teach (just like common gurus do)
They're really great in color red (Purva ashadha looks great at color red because the birth nakshatra of Mars is Purva Ashadha)
Conflict between their philosophical beliefs about material world is a common problem
This nakshatra really great for standing up for yourself.
Ironically, Even though this nakshatra is Venus ruled vimshottari nakshatra, The Men who has this nakshatras are some of the worst misogynistic people that exist!
Great at arts especially drawing, painting things like related to visual.
Men with this nakshatra are WOMANIZER
Women with this nakshatra are intimidating compared to other Venus vimshottari ruled nakshatra.
Uttara Ashadha
Women with this nakshatra often have nude scenes in movie. Ex: Angeli Khang, Sydney Sweeney (both have uttara ashadha moons)
Uttara ashadha means latter victory, but it doesn't mean "late success". Ishowspeed has this sun and at the young age, as i was typing this, he's streaming and travelling different countries.
Uttara ashadha are common for gay people. (Looking directly for Caitlyn Jenner and Lil Nas X) If that makes sense.
They're also coquette pink and very girlish. If "sun" nakshatra comes to mind people would think "masculinity, strongest, fierest" but then you see the actual people who has this and very FEMININE AESTHETIC.
The stereotype that i find true to this nakshatra is they're independent and successful. If you're Uttara ashadha native and you feel you are not that successful, trust me it will happen!!
#astrology notes#vedic astro notes#astrology observations#vedic astro observations#claire nakti#vedic astrology#sidereal astrology#pick a card#magha nakshatra#vedic chart#uttara ashadha#purva ashadha#mula#jyestha#anuradha
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Relativity Falls Lore Concept- The Oracle and Bill
The Oracle:
I was initially inspired by the Twitter user @SUwu159's depiction of the Oracle in their take on Relativity Falls, and made my own adaptation as I learned about her in canon.
(Assume she can change colors because I couldn't pick what I liked most)
This version of The Oracle isn't malicious per se, and does not desire the same conquest or chaos sought out by Bill. But she likes universes to be organized and quaint (or answers to another high power that demands it), and finds fulfillment in achieving these goals through any means necessary.
The Oracle and Dipper:
(Sorry if this dialogue tastes like a corndog in your mouth. I just needed to write a semi-resolution to Dipper's side of the relationship, ha.)
Getting into the real struggle with the Pines family. Dipper and Mabel don't fight and hold grudges like the Stans (that we've seen of), so my opinion is that they drifted apart in their late teens and twenties, both feeling pressured to be less attached at the hip. My current belief (though I'm very willing to rewrite this section) is that Mabel and Dipper both poured a lot of energy into pretty niche fields, and being very busy meant very short and rare windows to reach out. Both assumed the other was doing bigger and better things and felt self conscious / childish for wanting eachother's company.
I'm still considering Mabel's backstory, since I think she probably hit lower points than Dipper. You know. Starving artist, lol. But Dipper entered into paranormal investigation, pest control, etc. before his ghost + monster catching went far enough for his name to gain some notoriety. Hell, maybe Pacifica's family reached out to him to take care of "rats" that were actually ghosts, cementing his interest in Gravity Falls and giving him a window inter supernatural work.
Dipper was taken on as something of an apprentice to the Oracle 30ish years before canon as word of his good and dangerous deeds spread. However, what was at first a personal dream come true (saving lives with nerd magic) soon became a personal hell as the Oracle began to overwhelm Dipper with knowledge of various futures and universes where everything he cared about could be destroyed. He's always been over prepared and incredibly paranoid, and became obsessed with protecting the world by acting as a partner to the Oracle.
He ends up doing- or not doing- a lot of morally ambiguous things and gaining a lot of enemies. He is too ashamed to face his family- especially Mabel- with what he's done and burden them, giving the Oracle more to use against him to keep him working for her. Basically "you've already done all this and risked it all, there's nowhere to go if you stop now." Eventually this ends in her seeing him fit for her work and convincing him to hide out in and save other universes, which he gets trapped doing for the next three decades.
Little throw away idea: Pacifica could have been an investor or partner, but left as they uncovered secrets about the Northwest family. Maybe she wanted to undo something (debating making any of the Oracle's powers time related just because I hate time travel) or stop a current show of corruption, but Dipper had to stop her for the "greater good."
In the main universe, Mabel goes to Gravity Falls upon news of her brother's disappearance, searching for any loose end to trace back to him.
I love that in canon, Dipper is willing to do anything for Mabel, and Mabel gives it back. Dipper here spends all of his life keeping as many versions of her as safe as he can, and she spends all her life trying go seek him out- maybe even dropping a larger opportunity outside of Gravity Falls for her art and settling on business at the shack. Dipper wants Mabel alive, Mabel wants them both happy. I like the idea that it's Dipper and Mable vs. The Future but the future is a demon, alien thing.
Which leads me to...
Bill Cipher:
I'm actually gonna cover a couple versions of Bill I think are fitting for this AU, because I initially wasn't sure if I wanted him here at all.
Child Bill:
Pretty straight forward. Bill as a baby, child thing is tempting and this is the au where he'd exist. Personally though, I think Ford's friendship with Fidds would be more enriching to his growth, and Bill's personality is so close to Stan's they would likely be competing to fill very similiar roles. (If Bill behaves differenty as kid, I don't know about it.) Honestly, Bill is super similiar to Ford and Stan, and works better as a kind of foil or antagonist because of that (imo). I do find the mental image of Ford carrying Bill around funny. I do not enjoy human bill like, conceptually, so I'm probably never gonna design one as an adult or child, lol.
It would be cool to see a world where Bill didn't accidentally kill his parents though.
Bill - Reincarnated Original
Technically I guess they could all be reincarneted (especially baby Bill), but this version of Bill experienced and holds memories of the original canon events in GF. Beings like Bill and the Oracle can remember recent/soon approaching lives, and catch glimpses of more distant cycles as well.
What I like about Bill's recent role as an antagonist to Ford and Stan is that he constantly describes them in the terms of their worst traits, and sees them through the lens of the roles the world placed on them. In this AU, Bill is the epitome of the past (in this case a past life) coming back to bite the twins. He rattles their progress in communication as well as their sense of inner peace by bringing old Glass Shard Beach issues into Gravity Falls.
(Depicted here-> moments after Ford summons Bill using the same ritual as Gideon.)
The drawback to this is that it feels a lot like covering old ground.
Simply Bill:
This is pretty much just regular old Bill with the same fresh perspective as everyone else, and also the one I'm going with. He tried and failed to get Dipper's trust in the past and had to lay low at the arrival of the Oracle. Once they left, Bill targeted Mabel. I think it could be very interesting for Mabel and Bill to either have a fresh relationship wherein Bill is actively taking advantage of her desperation to find Dipper, or for Bill to be an old betrayal (not romantic, but not dissimilar to the opportunistic exes Stan and Ford have to be wary of and beat back under the rug regardless).
Either he shows himself to Mable early on, or decides that Gravity Falls is both Oracle-free and worth the time after either Ford or Mable summon him. Afterall, 30 years isn't much to him.
Maybe he exists in the background like he's always done, or the kids (being snoopy and disrespectful of Mabel's secrets) discover what Mabel's doing and run into him on their own.
Whether Bill is aware of the original series or not, I think he could be neat to stick in between Stan and Ford again for conflict. My favorite aspect about Relativity Falls is the prospects of the Stans having a larger support system and better tools to help themselves with. Beating Bill faster and better would be the ultimate testament to Mabel and Dipper's skills as functioning role models, even if Mabel is currently blinded by her focus on Dipper.
Stan and Ford will fight and they will make up, but this time maybe they can overcome it on their own.
I also think a good idea is having Ford and Stan's issues be completely Bill free (outside of like an episode or two's worth of relevance, unless he put them into a particularly stinging situation). It would feel fresher and also streamline the plot, lol.
Overview:
- Dipper is stuck travelling the multiverse with the Oracle and keeps himself sane by thinking of Mabel and protecting various versions of her.
- Mabel is investigating his disappearance in Gravity Falls and is working on a portal/portal equivalent with Bill to bring him back.
- The kids may or may not be aware of this.
Looking at the main series of events, I think it'd be neat go back to the apprenticeship conflict, where Ford could be approached by the Oracle (or something else that makes sense) with the promise of being a "hero," but knows better now because of Dipper and his experiences with Bill. It's kind of a more convoluted version of Ford's proposal to Dipper in canon, and they basically learn the same thing, lol. You can hang out with ghosts if you want, but demons are gonna get you. Maybe being a child with siblings is all you need.
(Stan could also be offered this, given the Oracle already knew he- or at least someone with his face- would beat Bill, but I think it's well established he isn't very interested in doing anything without family.)
All in all, things might be a bit crowded with two antagonists. But I do like the concept of Bill's arrival and subsequent chaos triggering Dipper and the Oracle's return to Mabel's dimension. I also love the idea of Bill, the Oracle, and some secret third thing all trying to pull the Pines family apart, and it's like a Man vs. God turned into a Family vs. Destiny thing, idk. Just trying to make it feel bigger.
Thank you for reading all this. It was a lot to draw. Next time I do anything for Relativity Falls, I'm gonna go back to the smaller things like Mabel bonding with the kids and stuff like that.
#fanart#drawing#gravity falls#relativity falls#relativity au#bill cipher#the oracle#oracle#dipper pines#mabel pines#stanford pines#stanley pines#i'm tired#long post#you don't have to read it#but pretty please look at the shitty drawings#they took my a long time collectively
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Jealousy Unleashed // Luke Castellan
pairing: luke castellan x fem!reader
genre: angst
request: Hi, could you do Luke castellan x fem reader where the reader makes Luke jealous? Thank you!
summary: you and Luke had an argument, and now you try to break his silent treatment by making him jealous.
warnings: probably language
wc: 1k
notes: I had many ideas of how to approach this, but I decided to make it a bit angst. hope you like it :)
english is not my first language, so there may be mistakes.
・❥・༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶・❥・
You and Luke were a beautiful couple, but just like all couples, there was problem in paradise. You didn't argue a lot, but when you did, oh boy! You were both too stubborn and, above all, too proud to admit your wrongs. This time was no different. After a stupid argument (that neither of you remember the cause of because it probably was something stupid), Luke was giving you the silent treatment. He had done this before, but he never lasted longer than a few hours because neither of you could go very long without talking to the other. But this one had been going on for almost two days, and you wouldn't let it pass.
You were at the bonfire sing-along with the Apollo cabin, blatantly talking and laughing with anyone who wasn't Luke. When he attempted to get your attention from across the bonfire, you glanced at him, then turned back around to continue your conversation with Charles.
Luke crossed his arms, gritting his teeth. "Stay calm," he thought to himself. "She's just talking to Beckendorf. He's like four years younger than her."
Just when he started to cool off, you stood up from your seat. He watched as you walked your way to Nick, a boy from the Athena cabin, closer to your age. His blood started to heat up.
In all honesty, you were just talking to him to piss Luke off. It was an awful thing to do—you recognized that—but maybe he needed to suffer a little before you forgave him. Plus, maybe this would make him break his silence and actually talk to you instead of glaring like a little kid from across the room. If Luke wanted to hold a grudge, you would too, and you knew he wouldn't apologize unless you took action.
And of course, you refused to be the one to apologize first.
The Stolls walked over to Luke, picking up immediately on their brother's increasing anger. Connor poked Luke's arm and almost jumped back when Luke gave him a look of murderous rage. "What do you want?" Luke snapped, looking over Travis' shoulder as you leaned toward Nick a bit more. "I'm a little busy, as you can see."
"Totally!" said Travis, rolling his eyes.
"Maybe you should just apologize to her instead of glaring at the back of her head while she talks to Nick." Connor said, glancing over his shoulder at you.
"Who isn't exactly ugly, by the way." Added Travis, reminding Luke how most of the girls at camp consider him attractive.
"You don't know her like I do, so you wouldn't understand. Now go do... whatever you were doing, I told you I'm busy." Luke waved them away with his hands and returned to his previous activity of glaring at his girlfriend, arms crossed, and a childish pout on his lips.
"Yeah, busy pretending you don't care about your girlfriend while pretty boy over there is making openly flirtatious comments towards her." Connor nudged him.
"If I were you, I would apologize now, before she and Nick get even cozier over there," Travis pointed towards you and Nick, who were sitting incredibly close. He had one hand twirling a stand of your hair, the other resting close to your knee.
Luke was furious; in a cartoon world, he would've turned red, and steam would've come out of his ears. He quickly made his way over there before you could even blink, forcing himself in between you both and sitting down right there. He leaned into you, wrapping an arm around your waist, before turning his head toward Nick and raising his eyebrows.
"That looked like a nice conversation, mind if I join you?"
"I don't think it would make much of a difference if I said no," Nick said. The smile he had on his face while he was talking to you had vanished.
Luke smirked, shaking his head. "Nope," he replied, taking your hand in his. You didn't protest; you knew this was his way of saying he was sorry and that the real apology would actually come out soon enough, that is, when Nick stood up and left. Except, Nick stayed in his seat, narrowing his eyes.
"You're not a very good boyfriend, are you, Castellan?" Nick fired, and, oh gods, you could almost see a vein flickering in Luke's forehead. "Since when do you control who your girlfriend talks to?"
Luke pulled away from you, clenching his jaw. His fists tightened, and his eyes narrowed with fury. "Watch your words, Anderson. You're treading on thin ice." He warned, his voice low and dangerous.
You leaned forward, placing one hand on his shoulder and using your other one to relax his tight fist. "Hey, cool it down," you said softly. "This isn't the time for a clash."
Luke visibly relaxed, his shoulders slumping as he gave you a small smile, grabbing your hand tightly.
Nick stood up, a smirk on his face. "Well, that's adorable. A girlfriend having to calm her boyfriend down from murderous fits of rage. How cute."
You held Luke's hand tighter, and his previous anger was replaced with a smirk of his own. "Think whatever you want, Nick, but at the end of the day, there's one thing I get to do, and you don't," he said in a triumphant voice.
"And what's that?" Nick asked with the minimum interest.
"Kiss my incredibly beautiful girlfriend." Luke said, tangling his hands in your hair and pulling you towards him, pressing his soft lips to yours. His inner self did a victory dance when you deepened the kiss, your own hands moving to his cheeks.
"You're such an asshole sometimes," you told him when you pulled away. It wasn't a lie; even Luke himself knew it. But he didn't really care, and neither did you.
He had gotten Nick to walk away and had gotten you to forgive him, all in one shot. Plus, he made out with you, which was always a bonus.
#luke castellan#luke castellan x reader#percy jackon and the olympians#percy jackson#pjo x reader#luke castellan x you#luke castellan pjo#percy series#percy jackson books#angst#pjo imagine#one shot#luke castellan imagine#pjo books#pjo#pjo fandom
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can we get more dadtore fics plz?🤭🤭🤍🤍
Dadtore and his raccoon child
── ୨୧:il dottore & reader
୨୧﹑synopsis :: dadtore gets his coat stolen and quite possibly has a mild existential crisis at the realisation he is a present and available father
୨୧﹑genre :: fluff
୨୧﹑content :: gn reader, child reader, reader’s backstory is ambiguous, it's finally acknowledged they don't talk but feel free to ignore that, sorta proofread (omg finally I edited something)
୨୧﹑words :: 1.9k
I went to publish this and realised I lost all my dividers because I'm on a new laptop so I'm gonna have to go get those back 😭😭
anyway baby has officially graduated to raccoon status because each day this child grows more feral and will continue to do so 🫵 I'm surprised I even managed to write this cause I've been calling so many grown men babygirl lately Idk what even makes one say that about König from Call of Duty but I do
Whether against your will or the result of some strange form of Stockholm Syndrome, you have somehow come to love the days spent with him. It scares him more than he'd like, knowing that your life rests in his hands, even more so that that bothers him, yet he has been unable to remain especially angry with you.
No matter what you do, what buttons you push, and how much you've forced him to rearrange his lab to practically babyproof it, his desire to consider you a pest dies. It has rapidly died since he realised you clung to him so tightly when you became ill, even if it turned out to be only a low-grade fever that you were free from in a day or two. Something about it made the growing bond he had noticed and his fondness for you skyrocket, and it all happened right under his nose while he was distracted with making you comfortable and keeping you company.
Dottore never thought he'd have a doorframe close to one of the shelves in his lab marred by the marker-made scribbles of a height tracker specifically to tell him when it's time to cram everything up another shelve, yet it's there. He sees it whenever he swivels his chair in that direction or when the segments poke at it, mildly intrigued by his interest.
He can't trust some of them yet — not with you — the ones he does trust are almost entirely uninterested in you because that keeps you safe. His segments can't gain anything from a child who only annoys them by trying to hug their leg until they shove you away. From there, you can sense that they don't want to play from the glares you get that send you scurrying back to whatever corner has the reject dolls Sandrone gave him to mock him for his soft spot, so they don't care.
Despite wishing you were little more than a lingering annoyance he could palm off to the first available parental figure, you trust him so implicitly, and he's falling victim to your charms each time you stand behind him, peeking over his shoulder to spy on him like you're so sneaky, even when he can clearly see you looming out of the corner of his eye. You show interest and want to be around him, to loiter despite knowing you will receive only acknowledgement as he talks to you.
Returning to the lab reveals that you seem to have stolen his coat again — at least, that's what he gleans from its migration from the back of his chair to the floor — though he does not particularly mind even as you drag it back to your little set of chairs set up in the corner for you to play with.
Whatever tables did to you, Dottore has yet to figure out how it made you want to shove the little table you have over there so violently all the time. In your defence, it is usually in the way, and maybe it did something to deserve it that has you holding a grudge, but it's irrelevant as you position your little chairs and drape his coat over the backs of them to make a roof for your hideout.
A child's cubby.
At some point, he noticed you took to childish things like that, even when you didn't do that before, almost like you became more…childish. It's welcome. You warm up to the safety of his care and the joy of goading him into entertaining you.
He used to bar the younger segments from making those forts as they'd put them everywhere and neglected to return the items they grabbed to do so. You are not exactly better, though you tend to use appropriate materials. It is preferable to their habits of senselessly trying to stack things on top of each other and then getting confused as to why they would all fall down when a chasm to crawl inside of does not magically appear in the absence of intentional planning.
There's a reason he's Il Dottore and not Il Ingegnere.
The stealing does not change, however.
Dottore approaches your cubby, intent on investigating this fort you've crafted with the help of his coat. He realises you're humming when he gets closer, as you have been a lot lately. You make more noises now. Not quite words, but noises, and that's more than enough for now. He'd like to hold a proper conversation with you at some point, but you won't even say your own name, let alone keep up a whole verbal conversation that doesn't require a game of charades.
"Just what are you doing?" he asks, and the moment he does, you've grabbed the overcoat from where you had balanced it and run off giggling.
You narrowly escape him, settling off by his chair where you had first obtained the coat — a fickle cat-and-mouse game that will inevitably end one of two ways — you seem intent on keeping that coat, however. He watches as you burrow amidst the thick fabric of the overcoat you mischievously stole from him, the furs tickling your cheeks and warming you up as it sits bunched around your tiny body in a heap of cloth. It engulfs you as you are, but you always like it.
What bothers him so much is that if you were any other child pulling these stunts and creating trouble, Dottore would have found some way to get rid of you by now — he could've given you to the Knave. He can't. He's tried. He tried so hard, even attempting to justify it with his own fondness by convincing himself it would be for your own good. He even talked to her about it at one point, and she almost stole you, thinking the worst, before she realised how spoiled you were by Dottore's standards.
Selfishly, he couldn't do it. He couldn't bear it, even when he told himself Arlecchino would take better care of you than he could ever.
So you're still here, still interrupting his vital work to play a mockery of hide-and-seek where you manage to be the worst yet most endearing hider he could possibly seek, burrowing yourself out of sight beneath his coat as your head disappears and you lay flat on your stomach. A pest. That's what you should be. He stalks toward you like you are a tiny pest hunted by an eager cat waiting to catch you, but stops just before you.
It is nowhere near Dottore's nature to loudly question what this stray pile of laundry is doing lying around, nor can he bring himself to try baby-talking you in that singsong voice people use for children, so he kneels in front of you instead, lowered to your eye level. You wouldn't particularly appreciate it if he did pick up that ear-grating habit anyway.
The overcoat writhes as if a creature stirs beneath it, and you poke your head out to greet him with a slowly forming cheeky grin that devolves into giggles as you realise you are caught. You duck back into the safety of his coat, burrowing amidst its comfort and returning to hiding.
He cannot possibly keep the amused huff he lets out from escaping at the sound of your giggling before shaking his head. "Are you going to come out?" he asks. Of course not. You are going to squirm under there until he pulls you out. "Insufferable little thing," he mutters half-heartedly. He's unable to find the will to be truly angry with you, though he never really was in the first place, merely relenting at your silence.
Dottore rests his other knee on the ground and steals his coat from your little hands. With it, you shortly follow as you are collected in his arms and perched on his lap as he sits back in his chair, leaving you poorly balanced yet able to shift yourself into a comfortable spot where you won't fall. Dottore wraps his coat snugly around you, just as you had done before, and lets you settle into place.
You're so small, pacified by his arms around you to reluctantly grant you the hug he knows you want. You like those. He realised that when all you wanted in your sickness-fuelled stupor was for him to cradle you in his arms and let you lean against him. Something about it makes you look so vulnerable. You need someone who can care for and protect you despite your ability to care for yourself; he is the woefully imperfect choice who should not want to take on that task but who may be uniquely suited to it because of that.
'Damaged' children who have had to adapt to the shortcomings of others do not benefit solely from perfection but can become suffocated by it. They need something that suits their unusual need for guidance without expectation of normalcy. He's living it now as his inexperience with this idea of a family forces him to confront imperfection — dismal humanity.
You will never be like a child raised in a perfect family, nor can you offer him complete dependence and vulnerability; he doesn't mind that. In exchange, he will never be your perfect father figure. He will cradle you with his imperfection and wish that this feeling makes you happy if nothing else.
You offer what you want, and he takes what is given because he wants it. Badly, he wants it, even if he is unwilling to admit the possibility of that being real.
He wants to stay like this, to keep picking you up, even when lifting your weight and gathering you in his arms grows harder each time. He wants to watch you nestle against him, mark your height on the doorframe every month, take care of you when you're sick, worry about someone other than himself, and make room for you in a place where there should be none. He wants to give you what you were almost robbed of, see you make friends and smile each day.
For now, he must start small, no more than sitting in front of what probably looks like jumbled garbage to you and resting his hand on the back of your head to pull you closer in a rare show of affection. Gentle. He is entirely unused to the idea of being gentle and protective of something that lives and breathes.
Dottore hates the very idea of your existence meaning something to him — a visceral reaction to the unfamiliar — but cannot resist the vulnerability of it all, the thought of loving someone who loves him back in a way he has yet to fathom, though he is not so presumptuous as to mindlessly believe you love him, even now. You would not be asked to point to your father and turn to him, but you don't have to. Something in that thought is exciting, a desperate grasp at unconditional love from something he cares for, even against his will, but this middle ground somewhere between babysitter and father is as comfortable as anything he wants will get.
#♡ — anon visit.#✦ — headcanons.#✦ — fluff.#dottore#il dottore#dottore x reader#il dottore x reader#genshin impact#genshin#genshin impact x reader#genshin x reader
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Rise Characterizations Pt. 8!!!!!!!!
This has literally been sitting in my drafts for so long I forgot it existed. Sorry to all the Baron Draxum fans (and Draxum himself, bbgirl deserves better). If you're new to my line of notes here's the beginning where I started with Raph. Alright part 8, Baron Draxum, here we go.
Language Habits:
Speaks in long and drawn out sentences, if you're getting nervous about run-on sentences you're on the right track
Due to this, tends to give speeches or monologues
Dramatizes everything fairly eloquently, look for the most exaggerated form of a word. Classic villain speak: "imbeciles", "brethren", "eliminate"
Puts emphasis on those dramatic adjectives and verbs
Occasionally refers to himself in the third person, not as often as Raph
Tends to yell or raise his voice when frustrated or lost in passion
A common gag is trailing off in a casual tone about the severity of his experiments ie his "if it works right" about the ooze causing pain when mutating that poor fish guy
Personality:
Incredibly intelligent yet impatient. It isn't known to my knowledge who taught Draxum or if he taught himself, but his mastery of alchemy and fighting makes him a truly impressive opponent. However, he's always cutting corners to get to his goal. He wasn't willing to raise through the ranks of The Foot the traditional way, he created an army of mutants rather than seek yokai, and was unwilling to spend further time interpreting the prophecy of doom towards yokai-kind
Flair for the (over)dramatic. Draxum is almost your classic evil villain kind of guy. He'll pull out all musical stops, including flowing hair and clothes. On the other end he'll completely overreact and commit to things of little matter like his position as a lunch lady.
Unyielding in his stubbornness. Draxum is not easily swayed in his belief, and even as hard as Mikey tries he is not rid of his disdain for humans by the end of the series. Guy was also incredibly persistent in his research despite his lab blowing up twice. This also allows him to hold longer grudges, even resorting to childish pettiness if he feels annoyed enough.
Affinity for muscles and power. He was drawn to Lou Jitsu for many reasons, but a main one was definitely his muscles. All his guards are usually incredibly beefy, and he was immediately drawn to Raph as "beautiful" when he's reintroduced to his specimens. As for power, he's drawn to the dark armor and is lost in the ecstasy of being imbued with so much mystic energy.
Self-absorbed and egotistical. Draxum is kind of obsessed with his title and self-proclaimed responsibility for saving yokai-kind. He's not one to easily admit his mistakes and takes great pride in his work.
Willing to toe the line of morality. Huginn and Muninn have blatantly called him their evil boss, but Draxum does see his actions for the good of yokai-kind. I don't think he really cares if he's working with evil organizations (The Foot) or doing evil things if he saves the day.
Team builder. I think it's interesting how Draxum is drawn to building teams. He's drawn to working together, all he wants to do is unite yokai and his mutants into an efficient force. This does not mean he's very successful.
Miscellaneous:
Has minor telekinesis
Was a warrior before he was an alchemist
Does not have a good relationship with the Three Heads (apparent leaders of the Hidden City)
Controls seeds that can a) grow into vines, b) expand into robotic vine gauntlets, c) encase his gauntlets into meatier gauntlets that can shoot out waxy cocoons
Is referred to as a sheep-man from the brothers, but I suppose whatever animal you interpret him as is up to you
Has a great singing voice :) ( which is subjective I suppose)
Alright now that is finally posted just gonna let you know that this Isn't the last of my rise analysis posts!! I'm so sorry for the wait!! I got lost in so many schedule things. I'll try and pump a few more analysis posts out within these next few weeks (excluding June 16-22), but I've also been busy working on miscellaneous wips. Thank you for being so sweet to me on all the other notes posts, you guys are so awesome :)
#save rise of the tmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the tmnt#rottmnt#tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#fanfic#character analysis#baron draxum#baron draxum rottmnt#critter talks
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theres something to be said about how mac still holds such a childish adoration for his parents after such a long time. how literally its shown to us by the fact that
mac always slicked his hair back as a child, when he still had contact with his father
he stops doing this into adulthood, but later in life, once mac interacts with his father again, he starts slicking his hair back again
he doesnt stop. slicking his hair back. until his own father walks out during his coming out performance. the guy he put it on for. only after that does he completely stop styling his hair that way
not to mention the constant refusal that his mom (and dad) could be anything but perfect, the way hes so desperate to do good by them, viewing them as the way to measure his success...
and. yeah thats. something.
the internal denial that his parents treated him poorly, the fact that its his primary instinct to deny that his parents suck, the constant dismissal of his own issues relating to family because his whole life hes been told that "other people have it worse". the way hes internalized that so hard. the way it takes his dad walking out on macs coming out performance to him for mac to stop blindly idolizing some guy whos threatened to kill him
the constant fear of his own father, while also believing him to be the coolest bestest guy ever. the way he always assumes his father is gonna get violent when actually talking to him, but sings nothing but praises when away from him
the fact that he still calls his dad "daddy" even.
i mean you cant really blame him for not fully growing up in some areas huh
its not even that i think he doesnt know that his parents treat him horribly, it just really seems like he wants so badly to believe thats not the case from years of having his cries for help ignored or made fun of. he cant have been treated poorly, because charlie was treated poorly, and his baggage isnt nearly as bad as charlies, so clearly macs home life wasnt bad.
i think thats proven most of all by his frustration with his own family at times, it really feels like theres some underlying issues. they can very quickly manifest as frustration and anger, but honestly its probably mostly sadness. the way he reacts to his own mother really reminds me of how i interact with family members i have grudges with but have to pretend i dont. im not actually angry at any of these people, im mostly just exhausted by them.
he very clearly is still aware of the neglect he faced as a kid, to me. he knows his home life was severely fucked up, hes just never been able to express that, so hes coped by just. pretending that it didnt happen.
and realistically i dont know if he could ever properly acknowledge that his home life was fucked and his parents suck. maybe hed acknowledge that his dad sucks now, but it wouldnt have been that bad when he was a kid and wasnt a fag. right? he was loved then. his mom still did a great job raising him, and he really loves her, and he was raised with all the love and care a child needs.
#iasip spoilies#mac mcdonald#iasip#its always sunny in philadelphia#mac macdonald#im just rambling here#i wasnt fully conscious for like half of this im sorry if it ever gets incoherent#also still have only watched the first episode of season 14#so sorry if i get anything wrong here#im just speaking from a post s13 perspective i guess
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disclaimer; the way this was worded can make it confusing, but these are behaviors or traits in other people the members could potentially feel turned on, and turned off by. enjoy 💌
bts' turn on's and turn off's
based on tarot. i do not know these idols personally. energies are always changing. what i say is NOT straight fact. pls take it with a grain of salt!
jin
turn on's
fair-minded and balanced
pleasant, gentle, peaceful and patient -> doesn't get angry or riled up easily
understanding of people's needs and okay with adjusting themselves accordingly
gives him the space and alone-time he needs
introspective, wise and intelligent (asks and ponders on the deeper questions in life)
reflects back on their actions and behavior -> is self aware enough to admit when they messed up
has valuable advice to give (it's kind of a pattern, he's definitely drawn to attractive brains and mindsets)
is open-minded and ready for new experiences -> not closed off and hesistant or scared of everything
would like to go on fun trips and activities with him
okay with more of a slow-burn but consistent and stable relationship -> doesn't rush to proceed quickly (like someone who's alright with getting to know each other slowly, maybe even start as his best friend first)
turn off's
overly emotional and dramatic (he'd feel overwhelmed and eventually drained)
but also too cold and severely detached (someone who has no sympathy for the people around them)
acts cowardly and avoids facing the consequences of their own actions
uselessly mean and cruel with their words
too proud and self-centered -> puts themselves and their own needs above others
full of selfish greed and doesn't know how to appreciate and be grateful for what they already have
clings to him and gets too possessive or controlling
too focused on superficial values (like money, fame, reputation, material possessions, etc..)
never satisfied with themselves nor the people around them -> keeps nagging, complaining and just spreading unpleasant energy
feels attacked quickly, takes everything personally and gets defensive right away
suga
turn on's
has a strong and transformative effect on the people around them (powerful presence, lingers in your mind)
knows what it's like to struggle and has gained inner strength from the experience (i.e. he thinks it's impressive to hear stories about how someone overcame a seemingly hopeless situation and learned from it in hindsight)
therefore has a good understanding of life and a lot of wisdom (keeps intriguing him with their mindset, words, thoughts, etc.)
deep and complex personalities
i keep hearing “dark”, i can see him liking when people are dressed in black, have darker hair, tattoos, etc.
doesn't insert themselves in unnecessary drama or conflicts and doesn't engage in childish gossip
has a good eye for detail and is quietly observant -> remembers the minor things about others (i.e. he'd love if his partner overheard him talking about a specific gift he wants and secretly bought it for him)
generous and giving to their loved ones (gifts really are the way to his heart)
very clever, quick-witted -> challenges him mentally
turn off's
doesn't have their priorities straight
delusional and overly unrealistic
too childish and emotionally immature
stuck in the past -> holds endless grudges and keeps bringing up old incidents
too naive and optimistic all the time -> doesn't wanna acknowledge reality for what it is, actively avoids negativity and runs away from their problems
takes unnecessary risks, is too wild and untamed (like a loose cannon type of free spirit he can't keep track of)
too simple-minded -> doesn't comprehend or care about the deeper things in life
he's likely to just not vibe with overly protected and overly privileged people who've never had to go through any hardship in their life
cares too much about being liked by everyone and gets obsessed over what people think
doesn't know how to assert themselves and actively avoids confrontation
j-hope
turn on's
very talented or skilled at something (especially in an artistic field)
humble, grounded and always eager to expand their knowledge and improve their craft
self-aware -> can recognize and admit to their mistakes
but doesn't linger and dwell on them too much -> knows how to grow and learn from their failures
chooses their battles wisely -> doesn't engage in unnecessary conflict and arguments (peacemakers who don't like fighting)
soft- and kindhearted (someone with pure intentions)
has a strong sense of responsibility and duty
carries a lot of inner strength and resilience
knows how to take care of themselves and decorate their own garden -> doesn't always need to rely on people to do the hard work for them
doesn't beat around the bush too much and expresses themselves in a clear manner
tbh, i keep getting that he's just very into self-development. he feels drawn to people who are always set on becoming the best version of themselves and would love to be on their side for that journey
turn off's
overly selfish and greedy for material things -> doesn't enjoy sharing or taking other people's needs into consideration (like if someone turned out to be hoarding money secretly he'd get the ick majorly)
gets overly controlling or possessive of him
behaves like a stubborn know-it-all and refuses to listen to his side of the story
too secretive and closed off from him -> keeps confusing him and sending mixed signals
puts on too much of a mysterious and hard-to-get act
too negative, pessimistic and dark
doesn't tell him about their thoughts or feelings leaving him wondering and worrying
deceptive (like someone who tries to cover up their mistakes and isn't upfront and genuine in the things they do, only does it for the show)
refuses to change, even if deep down they know they would need to (i.e. because it negatively impacts their connection)
bottom of deck was the two of cups. i kept getting this very forgiving and accepting energy from him, where it doesn't seem like he has these extremely specific expectations. he's okay with his partner not being perfect, because as long as he genuinely loves them, he's willing to work on their downfalls together. very sweet energy. (probably my favorite out of bts)
namjoon
turn on's
has a lot discipline, drive and willpower
knows how to keep their focus on their goals and doesn't allow anyone to stand in their way -> very determined and ambitious
courageous and willing to take on tasks others avoid (like the person who steps up first to do the hard work no one else wants to do)
capable of enduring and withstanding life's trials in a strong manner
likes to be a source of support and guidance for the people around them
uses their resources or platform for a higher good (i.e. someone who donates money to the less fortunate or helps out the homeless, likes doing volunteer work)
knows how to be grateful, as well as appreciate and count their blessings
capable of creating deep, meaningful and emotionally intimate connections to people
loves deeply and intensely
possessive and protective over what belongs to them (can see this applying to not only material goods, but also the people they're close to -> someone who looks after their territory)
turn off's
overly delusional and unrealistic
has their head in the clouds and rose-colored glasses on all the time
doesn't know what they want in life and struggles to make clear decisions -> keeps leading people on
refuses to admit their faults and doesn't learn from their mistakes -> keeps themselves stuck and self-sabotages
too lazy to work for their own success and sucks up to people in the spotlight in order to benefit from them (don't hate me but i can see him feeling turned off by privileged chaebols or nepo babys who didn't really work for their own success)
has no control over their emotions or rage -> explodes or lashes out on people
lets their frustration out on the people around them
unreliable and doesn't stick to their words -> says one thing but ends up doing another
acts irresponsibly and recklessly
doesn't know how to take life seriously and cracks jokes at inappropriate times
tactless and ill-mannered (like he'd feel the ick if someone laughed inappropriately during the discussion of a serious matter)
he had so much to say for the turn off's. he definitely gives me this vibe of having very high standards. i can sense this balance of tough love and thoughtful empathy in him, which definitely makes him an impressive and commendable leader. it's kinda like he was made for the role, really.
jimin
turn on's
intelligent, articulate and eloquent speakers -> always finds the right thing to say in the right moment
capable of being logical and objective when the situation calls for it
level-headed and swift at making decisions (he's someone who can struggle with this a lot, which is why he can feel drawn to a person who's more decisive and clear in their thought-process than him)
isn't afraid to argue and knows how to confidently hold their ground in a strong but diplomatic manner, without crossing lines
however self-aware enough to know when it's time to step back and admit they're wrong
loyal, committed and dedicated to everything they do
seeks peace and quietness (he enjoys intimate and relaxing alone-time with the person on his side, and wants them to feel like a break from all the stress)
has an inspiring, uplifting and encouraging effect on the people around them
capable of understanding his emotional needs and attuning their behavior, actions and words to them (he can need a little bit of sugarcoating sometimes)
has a profound capacity of connecting to people on a deep and emotional level
turn off's
acts like they're entitled to have a say in his life and allows themselves to command him around
too traditional, conservative and narrow-minded -> judgemental towards people different to them
childish and emotionally immature (example: throws a fit and acts like an offended child once told about their wrongdoing without acknowledging their mistakes. most members seem to not like that in a person)
lack of integrity and weak moral compass
doesn't care about adjusting their actions to the situation and struggles understanding their need to do so
tactless and impolite (especially verbally)
lacks empathy and compassion for their loved ones -> too emotionally detached and cold in relationships
gets a kick out of hurting and offending others
taehyung
turn on's
has an intriguing and mysterious aura to them -> awakens his curiosity and makes him want to get to know them closer
is more closed off and private about their life matters (a person who just gives off this impression that no one actually knows them)
can give off a cold aura but is much more passionate and enthusiastic about their personal endeavors than what meets the eye (also doesn't feel the need to rub their success or achievements into people's faces)
has depth and complexity to their personality -> knows how to talk about deeper and serious subjects in life
but can also have fun, be playful and whimsical at times
he loves duality
someone who's usually mature, grounded and disciplined but also carries this inner child-like excitement about life
trustworthy, dependable and responsible
dedicated and committed to him
capable of maintaining a good work-life balance
turn off's
too lazy and doesn't hold themselves to any sort of standards (like they don't care about improving themselves in any way out of comfort)
too deadbeat, boring, uptight and serious all the time
has an outdated and overly conservative attitude
stuck in their own beliefs and condemning towards views different to their own
not appreciative and very “meh” about the important people in their lives -> doesn't care to put in any effort into their relationships
too self-centered and only focused on their own desires
clouded and blinded by their emotions all the time -> lacks decisiveness
too emotionally needy and whiny
thinks they're superior him to him or entitled to tell him what to do -> acts controlling
jungkook
turn on's
he loooves a chase and having to work for their attention -> inaccessibility can intrigue and attract him (i.e. if a group of people showed interest in him, the one who doesn't would stand out and catch his attention more)
has strong values and convictions -> isn't afraid to uphold their principles and defend themselves or their loved ones when the situation calls for it
intelligent, eloquent and articulate speaker -> good with words (he likes beautiful and melodic voices too, would love to just sit and listen to his s/o talk for hours)
has clear objectives and goals in life -> knows exactly what they want and how to get it (will make it clear to him as well, isn't a simping yes-man who just adapts themselves to him all the time)
knows their worth and doesn't give in to people quickly
successful but humble about their achievements
loyal and committed to the people they love
stands behind their words and keeps their promises
polite and well-mannered
brings a sense of stability and comfort to the people around them (like a person who's this dependable and reliable pillar for their loved ones)
has a good balance of more “masculine” and “feminine” energy -> someone who can be dominant, powerful and assertive but also nurturing, loving and soft
he likes playful push and pull (like giving in for a kiss and stopping just timely enough to leave him wanting more)
turn off's
too competitive, egocentric and greedy -> doesn't know how to give in or grant others their rightful spotlight
ill-mannered, discourteous and tactless -> isn't capable of reading the room and acts impulsively without consideration for the people around them
impolite and offensive with the way they speak
constantly negative and pessimistic -> always finds something to complain about and ruins the mood
lets out their frustrations on the people around them
acts superior to others with nothing to back it up with (basically an inflated ego)
sucks up to him, puts on a fake act just to impress him (like a simp who just plays mr/ms perfect for him, he isn't easily fooled and can see through someone pretending to be something they're not)
too secretive and mysterious -> unsettles him, makes him question their motives (someone who keeps making him feel like they're hiding something and have an ulterior motive or hidden agenda)
doesn't commit to what they say -> leads him on, says they'll do one thing but end up doing another
i kinda struggled explaining this but i got the ace of wands plus the world. basically means a spark of passion, a new beginning, but putting an end to it before it could develop further -> he wants someone who's in it for the longterm and not just a one-time thing.
jk essentially just needs to feel the sincerity behind someone's intentions and actions. he doesn't trust people easily anymore and gets suspicious. he can easily feel turned off by people who are obviously just sucking up to him or making him feel like they want to be with him for the wrong reasons.
obviously, he wouldn't wanna be with a person who only sees him as someone they can benefit from. he's used to people simping for him (it's giving “been there done that, don't want that anymore”), so he can feel drawn to people who don't really care; since that'd mean they're more likely to overlook his status, fame, etc. and look at him as a person, rather than an idol, fantasy or an opportunity for their own good.
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So, I saw that you would write for Fyodor rn, and if you want to, could you write him with a S/o that doesn't really understand, or acts on their emotions, because, I often struggle with making decisions and just use weird ways to make them (': (I kinda use something similar as when you would pluck a flower and pluck its petals? yeah-)
Also, please ignore this req if you don't want to do it ((:
fyodor dostoevsky with an indecisive s/o
0.4k words ~ gender neutral headcanons
tw: emotional manipulation, infantilization, toxic relationships
a/n: if you guys want me to make fyodor nice you have to request that specifically sorry. he loves all of you very much but thats kind of a curse on you ngl
Fyodor is a very… particular man, to put it lightly. It’s a frustrating habit of his for you, but to be fair, it’s what’s allowed him to thrive all these centuries. One of those unfortunate particularities is that he… doesn’t love an indecisive person.
He finds that it shows a weak character, that you struggle to find an all-guiding principle like he does. But, he’d be willing to set that idea aside. For you. And only you.
Once he stops holding it against you, he does discover something wonderful in that “awful” trait of yours. Being indecisive means you’ll take his answer at the first chance.
You might even start coming to him with all your problems, asking him to decide away your life for you. Now that, he absolutely adores. Normally he would have to rip the independence out of you, but you’re oh-so willing to do that part yourself. Perfect.
Soon enough, he might just entirely stop asking for your input. After all,
“It’s not like you had an answer anyway, did you? Maybe you should allow me to do the thinking from now on, dearest.”
After that, it’s rare that you get the chance to answer anything for yourself (considering it’s even rarer for you to be in public without Fyodor.) Before you even have the chance to begin to trouble yourself with a decision, he swiftly cuts you off.
But, if you’re adamant about remaining an independent member of society, it’s unlikely he’d help you with anything less than a life-changing decision. Whenever you ask, he’ll leave you alone with your thoughts, letting you do whatever meaningless rituals you usually use when coming up with a decision.
Of course, he’ll always scold and belittle you after you regret that decision, though. The more childish the game you choose, the more cruel he can be. He thinks of it as a mercy, as “training the indecisiveness out of you.”
“You’re disappointed? Well, what did you expect? It must be difficult even for you to believe that doing… that, would’ve given you a logical answer.”
(Although, really, he’s just holding a grudge over the fact that you chose some silly wive’s tale over him. Picking petals? See, this is why you can’t be TRUSTED with yourself, Y/N!)
So, basically, Fyodor might choose an indecisive S/O on purpose! But… only because it makes it so much easier for him to tell you what to do. So… maybe stay away? (Unless you’re into that, I guess.)
#bsd tag#fyodor x y/n#fyodor dostoevsky x reader#bsd fyodor x reader#fyodor dostoevsky x y/n#fyodor x reader#bungo stray dogs x reader#fyodor tag
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Chapter 8
🔥Phoenix and Ashes
Suna Rintarou x f!reader
Summary: “It’s funny how nobody believed that we could make it work.” - “Well-maybe they were right.”
Meeting Suna Rintarou wasn’t part of your plan. Dating him, either. Getting your heart smashed into the palms of his hand, even less.
Content Warnings: Timeskip, Manga Spoilers, Alcohol Consumption, Mention of 1 OC, yn is lost & confused
Word count: 4.5k
chapter 1 - chapter 2 - chapter 3 - chapter 4 - chapter 5 - chapter 6 - chapter 7 - chapter 9
184.
That’s the number of days that have passed since you last saw Suna or heard from him. 184 full days, mornings and evenings, without hearing his voice or touching his skin. You can't sleep a wink the night before the twins’ birthday party. You squirm in bed and watch the hours pass.
So many questions run through your mind.
What will happen when you see him? Will he talk to you; look at you? If you have the opportunity to hold him again—will you?
It’s raining outside. You hear the raindrops brushing the trees before crashing against your window. The moon is shining bright and high in the sky, at times, clouds hide it. It’s a typical autumn night, heavy and nostalgic. Just like your heart.
Around 3 a.m. you decide to text Umi.
“I’m scared to see Rintarou,” you admit.
It doesn’t take her long to reply, “I can come if you want.”
Osamu has invited your best friend to the party. Not only because he had known her for years but also because he would feel better if you had her by your side.
“D’ya mind?” He asked his brother.
“Do whatever ya want,” Atsumu said, he tried to look unbothered, but Osamu knew him all too well. Umi and Atsumu haven’t seen each other since high school and their friendship did not end up on good terms. The boy was still holding a grudge towards her. But if he admitted it, he knew his brother would make fun of him for acting like a child. So, he played it tough, pretending that seeing her again after years would be fine (but anyway, that’s another story).
“You should sleep,” you text.
“Says you haha”, followed by “but really, just tell me and I’ll come.”
You stare down at your phone, unsure of what you should do. Since Osamu told her about the party, she has been asking you if you wanted her to come, but you brushed her off each time. However, now that it is only a matter of hours before you see your ex-boyfriend again, you start to freak out.
“If you have nothing planned why not.”
“I don’t! see you tomorrow then, try to have a good night!”
The sound of the rain covers your heartbeat, the caress of the wind against your window masks the trembling of your hands.
It’s going to be okay, you repeat and repeat.
You arrive at the Miya’s apartment before anyone else. You tell Osamu you want to help them (or, rather, him) prepare.
Atsumu comes out of the bathroom when you put the beers you have bought in the fridge.
“Oya, oya dear Mademoiselle.”
You share a surprised look with Osamu—one tinged with mockery and pity. It takes you a lot of self-control not to burst into laughter.
“Ya speak French now? And don’t walk around shirtless.” Osamu sighs.
“Yer my mom or what?” Atsumy says while getting closer to you. “My abs deserve to be shown to the world.”
Your eyes immediately fall on his toned chest and belly. And you must admit that yes, Atsumu’s muscles are indeed well-shaped and nothing compared to his high school days. Despite his childish attitude, he is a man now.
“See, she agrees with me.” He wraps an arm around your shoulder and smiles teasingly.
“I never agree-”
“I’ll grab a beer.” The setter cuts you off and opens the fridge.
Osamu strides forward and takes the beer from his brother’s hand, “Calm down ya moron, it’s for tonight.”
“The night is young little bro.”
“Huh?” Osamu frowns, “Never call me that again.”
Atsumu mumbles something back and the argument escalates as always. The starting point of the fight is soon to be completely set aside.
You laugh so hard, that you almost forget the knot in your stomach. Atsumu decides to go back to his room, insults resonating in the whole apartment.
“Why do you guys live together?” You ask, wiping a tear from the corner of your eye.
“Gosh, I don’t know. He pisses me off.” He grumbles.
“But?” You put your hands on your waist and look at him, waiting for your question to be answered—honestly.
“But…” He hesitates then mutters with a shy voice, “Am just used to bein' with him all the time, ya know. It’s -” he clears his throat, “comfortin'.”
The vulnerability in his eyes soothes your heart, you tilt your head and smile. Osamu sees your nose wrikling. He turns around, “Shut up.”
You lift your hands in defence, “I haven't said anything yet”
“But I know exactly what yer thinkin’”
“Can you read my mind, Miya Osamu?”
“I’d rather not.” He glances at you, his back still facing you.
His left profile really is his best, you tell yourself.
You only chuckle after that and stop the conversation here. After all, he is not wrong. Why would he want to read your mind when it’s full of Suna? Paced with the memories of what you shared and tortured by the regret of what could have been. Maybe this incessant ache in your heart and in your thoughts is a reminder of how guilty you should feel for letting your relationship down, for not showing him enough support. Maybe you have been too hard to love and he is happier with someone else.
Or maybe, you truly deserved better?
Maybe he is the one who let you down? Who didn’t fight for you?
Maybe you should be happier with someone else—could you be happy again; loved again?
You open your mouth. Anyone who would see you might think you have seen a ghost. The questions make you feel dizzy so you decide to push them away. You feel the tension of your face ease a little and when Osamu calls you to help him cut avocados to prepare some guacamole, you take a deep breath and join him.
It’s time for the guests to arrive.
Since Kita has some last-minute inconvenience at his farm, Ginjima is the first to arrive. Half an hour passes and the place is almost full.
You stay with Osamu in the kitchen, even if “ya should go talk with everyone”, he tells you. “I like to be with you.” You reassure him—how can he argue with you after that? But your gaze travels to the living room, moves through the clock hanging in the entrance, and stops at the door. And it keeps going there, again and again.
There is a weird combination inside your heart—fear mixed with hope. And each time someone knocks at the door, it hits you like a firework against a dark night; it’s noisy and overwhelming, but it’s also colourful and exciting.
Osamu pours you a glass of lemonade (he bought your favourite) when Suna enters his apartment. You see the discomfort in your friend’s eyes and turn to the direction he is glaring at.
Your body freezes. Your vision follows every single one of his moves—he shakes Atsumu���s hand, smirks when Aran fist-bumps him, takes off his jacket, runs his hands through his hair. Everything is going so fast, or so slow. You don’t know. You start panicking when his footsteps get closer to where you and Osamu are. You look down at the floor, the light reflecting on it is suddenly replaced by Osamu’s shadow. He stands before you, his broad back and shoulders almost hide your ex-boyfriend.
They greet each other while you restrain the tears from falling down your eyes.
“Hey,” you believe you end up saying. He says something back before turning his attention to Osamu.
“Happy birthday man.”
“Thanks bro, it’s nice to see ya.”
You think Osamu is sincere. They are friends after all and you never wished for them to grow apart because of you.
You finally decide to look at Suna—or maybe it’s just instinct, a force stronger than you, which pulls you to do so. It’s the closest you have been to him in months.
His face is perfect, and the shapes of his body outstanding.
You do not meet his eyes though and your heart breaks. You feel stupid, why would he look at you? Why would he want to have a conversation with you? Why would he care about someone as insignificant as y-
“Yer lemonade,” Osamu gives you your drink and smiles, “Want somethin’ to drink?” he proposes to Suna, pointing at the fridge.
“Sure.” The other boy says.
You bite your lips and think, the evening is going to be long and lonely.
If not for the twins you would storm out of this room, run to your parents’ house and muffle your sobs in your pillow.
Atsumu is drunk.
“It’s not even midnight,” Aran says nonchalantly.
Kita lets out a faint sigh, his eyes narrowing as he steps closer to Atsumu. “Atsumu,” he begins, his voice soft but firm enough to catch the setter’s attention. “D’ya want some water?”
“Captain!” Atsumu spins around abruptly, “Am so happy yer here!”
The boy often gives a slap on the back to his friends or teammates, you figured it’s his way of being friendly. It never looks like it hurts (well, it would probably hurt you since Atsumu is a 6’ tall and full-of-muscle athlete, but nobody was ever injured, so he must know how to control his strength). However, with three beers and six shots of sake in his blood, he loses all sense of control.
The slap he gives Kita makes the former captain trip. Suna, who is standing next to Atsumu, steadies him.
“Oh, I’m sorry,” Kita apologises.
Suna doesn’t understand him at first, Atsumu is the one who acted like an idiot. But then, he starts feeling something stinging on his chest. He realises Kita’s drink has been spilled on his t-shirt (white, of course).
“Sunarin!” Atsumu shouts in Rintarou’s hear, it startles him, “Shit, yer shirt is fucked.”
“It’s fine,” Suna sighs, clearly exasperated.
“’Samu!” Atsumu yells, his voice booming through the apartment.
“Atsumu, stop screaming,” Suna pleads, rubbing his temple as if trying to ward off an impending headache.
But Atsumu ignores him, “go get Sunarin one of yer shirts.”
Osamu, who had been sitting on the couch with you, raises an eyebrow in confusion. “Huh?”
Even in his drunken state, Atsumu seems to pick up on the bothered tone of his brother. “Yer such a shithead,” he mutters, though he probably meant to whisper. He pulls off his own shirt, revealing his toned torso (again), and hands it to Suna. “Wear that.”
Suna hesitates for a moment, but he eventually complies, pulling off his wet shirt.
“Fuck, Sunarin, yer girl is savage!” Atsumu suddenly blurts out, his loud voice cutting through the room like a knife.
You are following the scene from the corner of your eyes. You try as much as possible to not look at your ex-boyfriend, especially not when you see him starting to get shirtless. But when the blond twin screams and an awkward silence follows it, you can’t help but turn to the boys.
If you weren’t sat on the couch, vision perfectly directed to Suna’s back, you wouldn’t have understood what Atsumu meant. But you are sat on the couch and despite the dim light you see the scratches on his back.
“Yer a beast or what?” he continues, giggling like a teenager.
“Atsumu, stop.”
Umi interjects with frustration, but it feels distant, almost surreal to you. She gets up and steps closer to him, placing a gentle hand on his arm in an attempt to calm him down. But Atsumu’s too far gone and he continues to tease the middle blocker. The tension in the room thickens.
Umi tries again, her voice firmer this time, “Atsumu, that’s enough.”
“Oh, so ya know my name, huh? I thought you had nothin’ to do with me.” His slams her hand away and looks down at her, eyes filled with anger.
Osamu sighs and decides to take care of the situation.
As soon as you are left alone on the couch, you slip away from the living room, quietly making your way to the kitchen. The cool air is a relief, but it does little to soothe the turmoil brewing inside you. The tension in the room was suffocating, and you needed to get away from it all—the memories, the stinging pain, the sight of Suna's marked back.
As you lean against the counter, trying to steady your breath, you hear footsteps behind you. You turn to see Osamu, his brow furrowed with concern.
“Yer okay?” he asks, his voice soft, almost hesitant.
You nod quickly, not trusting yourself to speak without your voice cracking. “Yeah, I’m fine,” you manage to say, forcing a smile that you know doesn’t reach your eyes.
Osamu isn’t convinced. He takes a step closer, his gaze searching your face for any sign that you might need him to stay. But you shake your head, more forcefully this time. “Really, Osamu. I’m okay. I just need a moment.” Leave me alone, you beg him in silence.
He hesitates for a moment longer, his eyes lingering on you. Finally, he nods and gives your shoulder a gentle squeeze before turning to leave.
The moment he’s gone, you feel the weight of everything you’ve been holding back crash down on you. You glance around the kitchen, your eyes landing on a bottle of something strong on the counter. If Atsumu can act so freely with alcohol in his system, then why shouldn’t you? Maybe it will numb the ache in your chest, even if just for a little while.
You grab the bottle and pour yourself a generous amount, the liquid burning as it slides down your throat. You don’t care. All you want is to forget, to drown out the thoughts that have been plaguing you since Suna walked out of your life.
With the drink in hand, you head back to the living room. The scene has shifted slightly. Atsumu and Umi are nowhere to be found, and everything seems to be back to normal. You watch Gin and Kosaku play some cards game with a detached interest, but your eyes keep straying to where Suna is sitting. The pain deepens.
Osamu catches your eye from across the room. He must see something in your face because after a moment, he looks away, as if giving up on trying to figure out what you’re feeling. The drink in your hand is half-gone, and the room starts to blur slightly around the edges. You down the rest in one go.
An hour passes, and you’re in a drunken haze. The sounds around you—laughter, music, chatter—melt into an indistinguishable sound. As you stumble towards the bathroom, you nearly collide with the door, your mind spinning. But before you can push it open, you see Suna standing there, his tall frame blocking your path.
“Hey,” he says, his voice low and familiar, sending a shiver down your spine.
“Hi,” you answer.
He is about to get out of the way to let you through, but a voice urges you to make him stay. You need to say something; anything. And suddenly, the words tumble out before you can stop them, raw and unfiltered. “I still love you.”
His eyes widen slightly, and for a moment, you think you see a flicker of something—regret, maybe—in his gaze. “I’m sorry,” he says after what feels like an eternity, but his voice is distant, like he’s trying to put space between you even if he stands right in front of you.
You take a step closer, “I never stopped thinking about you, you know. I'm so fucking in love with you, Rin...”
He hesitates, his eyes searching your face as if he’s trying to decide whether you’re being serious or if it’s just the alcohol talking. “Are you drunk?” he asks.
Before you can respond, he reaches out and gently takes the drink from your hand. “I’m gonna go find Umi,” he says, as if that will fix everything, as if walking away again is the solution.
But the panic starts to rise in you, sharp and unyielding. You can’t breathe; the walls feel like they’re closing on you. You need to get out—now. Without thinking, you turn and rush out of the apartment.
You’re almost outside when someone catches up to you at the stairs, grabbing your arm firmly to stop you.
Osamu.
“Hey, where're ya goin'?” he asks worried.
“I need to leave,” you choke out, barely able to get the words past the tightness in your throat. “I can’t stay here, Osamu. I just can’t.”
“Okay,” he says softly. “Let’s go to the restaurant.”
The ride is silent. When you arrive at the restaurant, Osamu parks the car and helps you out, guiding you inside. He leads you to a seat and disappears into the back, returning moments later with a glass of water.
“Drink this,” he says gently, pressing the glass into your hands.
You take a sip, the cool water soothing your parched throat. It feels good. But it does nothing to ease the void in your chest. The alcohol is starting to wear off.
Osamu sits down across from you, watching you closely. He doesn’t say anything. For a moment, you almost break down right there in front of him, but you force yourself to keep it together. You’ve already shown too much tonight.
“You’re always so kind to me…” You look down at your drink, fingers grabbing the glass tighter.
“We’re friends.” He simply says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
“I don’t deserve it.” You’re ashamed to look at him.
He says your name firmly, “Don’t say that.”
But you cut him off, “I’m a mess.”
He gets up to get closer to you, you hear the chair squeak against the floor, and he grabs your shoulder to make you look at him. He’s so close, you think he can hear your heartbeats.
“Yer hurt. Ya haven’t seen him in months, it’s normal to feel like that. But yer not a mess,” he hesitates and smiles a little, “and even if ya were, I’ll be there for ya. That’s what friends do.”
You study each feature of his face; his eyebrows; his eyes; his nose and an inch further down…
Your lips end up on his.
You grab the back of his head to tank him down, his hands brush your skin all the way from your shoulder to your free fingertips where he intertwines them with his.
You’re kissing Osamu.
You’re kissing Osamu.
You push him quickly, “Oh my god I’m sorry.” You suddenly get up, panic invading you, “I didn’t mean to - oh my god… I must look so desperate right now.”
“Kissing me makes ya look desperate? Gosh Champion, that hurts.” He lets out a small laugh and his kindness makes you want to cry. You're too drunk to decipher how he really feels.
You finally explode. Tears flow like a waterfall. You friend pulls you against him, you feel the warmth of his shirt against your cheek, and you grab his back with strength, afraid that if he steps away, you’ll crumble.
You don’t remember what happened after that. What you know is that you fell asleep at some point and Osamu stayed by your side.
When you wake up, the sun has barely risen. Your back hurts, your head is pounding, your throat is dry. You take a look at your surroundings; you’re lying down on some bench in Osamu’s workplace. It’s calm, way too calm. You try to remember last night, but your headache makes it hard to think straight.
“Mornin’, should I take ya home?”
Osamu’s voice surprises you, you gulp and nod, unable to come out with a coherent answer. His jacket is covering your body like a blanket, you’re about to give it to him but he interjects quickly, “put it on. It’s cold outside.”
“Thanks,” you answer with a broken voice. You don’t even have the strength to argue with him.
Osamu tells you it’s Sunday and 7am as if he sees how disoriented you are. The neighbourhood is quiet, it reminds you of the day Suna broke up with you. The calm before the storm.
Speaking of storm, Suna is standing in front of your house, hands in his pocket, back lean against the wall.
You get out of the car with Osamu, confused.
Suna clears his throat and when he decides to speak, there’s hesitation in his voice, “Can we talk?”
Osamu is standing between him and you, but somehow, he feels invisible. The way you look at Suna like he is the centre of your solar system is threatening. He will always be your first choice; what did Osamu think? His body moves on instinct, and he takes a step back towards his car.
“I…” he starts, “’Tsumu probably made a mess, I’ll go check on the apartment.”
You agree but avoid his gaze.
A moment passes and you’re alone with Suna. It’s been so long you think you forgot how to be with him. How are you supposed to talk to him? Call him?
“I was worried yesterday. I went looking for Umi, but you had disappeared.”
“Were you really?” You ask, there’s poison in your voice. You feel the blood in your veins rushing through your whole body.
He takes the time before responding, “Of course.”
“Rin… You're telling me you're worried about me because I disappeared one evening, when you didn’t ask me how I was even once in the past six months? That’s nonsense.”
“I get that you’re angry, but I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”
He seems honest and it kills you. You clench your fists. How are you supposed to react to that?
Your mind goes through all sort of emotions, incomprehension, anger, frustration. You finally speak again, “Why?”
“Why?”, he echoes, puzzled.
“Why did you break up with me? And don’t lie to me.”
His lips open and close a few times. His hands come in and out of his pockets awkwardly. “I… I was stupid. I guess I got tired of our relationship. Hiroshima, the club, my friends, everything was new, and it was exciting. And when we were together, it felt like it was holding me back.”
He looks at you and quickly explains more, “But I was wrong and stupid. You’ve been my pillar for all those years, ever since we broke up, I feel lost and I keep doing shitty things.”
“We did not break up Rin, you dumped me, like I was nothing.” You remind him. You can almost feel your nails rip off the skin of your palms from clenching too hard.
“I’m sorry…” He looks down at the floor. He looks so pitiful but even so, he is still beautiful.
You hate yourself for wanting to pull him against you. He is vulnerable right now, almost weak which puts you in a position of power, and yet, deep down, he has you wrapped around his fingers, still he has your heart caged in his hands. How unfair, how unfair.
“What do you want?” You ask him, trying to sound suspicious.
“I was hoping we…we could start over.”
“Loving you ruined my life Rin, how am I supposed to trust you again?”
Of course, you would ask him that. Suna is far from stupid—he knows exactly what he’s done. Until yesterday, he wasn’t even sure if you still loved him. Why would you, after everything? But perhaps, there is a tiny flicker of hope. So, he tries.
“Let me show you that it can be worth it.”
“Where-where does that come from? You barely looked at me once last night, I told you I still loved you and you said nothing back.” Your voice trembles.
“I did look at you, I swear, more than I thought I would. I didn’t expect to feel like that when I saw you, but something was weird in my heart and when you told me you loved me, I panicked. I acted like a jerk, you have all the right in the world to hate me,”
You cut him off, “I could never. You know that.” Your fists relax.
There’s hope, there’s hope, he hangs on to the thought.
“So… Please let me make it up to you.”
“Did you have sex with her?”
He squints as if the accusation bothers him, but you have to know the truth.
“Rin.”
He doesn’t ask who you are talking and simply answers with a shy “yes.”
You deserve better,
You will find someone else,
Let go of him.
Your heart sings and the words give you the courage to walk past him.
“Wait.”
He says your name and grabs your arm.
One touch. It’s all it takes for you to melt, for your heart to forget all the pain it has been enduring for months.
You hesitate but your hand finds his cheek and you brush a strand of hair. How soft, you think. He closes his eyes, and his forehead leans against yours.
“Please,” the murmur sinks into your body.
“Let’s try.” You give up. You have been waiting for him to come back to you for so long, you have dreamed about those words so many nights. You don't have any other choice but to trust him now.
A comfortable silence settles between you, it almost makes you believe you’re in a dream. You decide to take a step back, but Rin doesn’t let go of your arm.
“I forgot my phone at the boys’ apartment.”
“I’ll come with you.” He hurries to say, afraid you would runaway if he doesn’t follow you.
“‘Tsumu is still sleepin’, Umi left an hour ago.” Osamu explains with a quiet voice once you’re back in the apartment. He hands you your phone.
“O-okay.”
You look around you. The living room is a mess, more than what you remember from last night.
Last night.
Your heart skips a beat.
“Hey, Osamu?” you start carefully, he waits for you to go on, “is everything okay, I mean between us?”
“Sure.”
“Sorry about last night.” You feel extremely guilty. You might have gotten the boy you love back but you can’t bear to lose one of your best friends.
“Last night? What happened last night?” He smiles. You’re relieved; your secret will be safe with him (he is so precious, you tell yourself). You’re about to answer but he lifts his eyes from your face, and you turn to see what has caught his attention.
Suna.
“We should go.” You say.
Osamu thinks you’re talking to him but when he sees you facing your ex-boyfriend he is confused. Suna’s answer confirms his doubts. Something is going on between you two.
“Yeah.” He takes your hand, “thanks for last night Osamu. I have a game in Osaka next month, I'll text you.”
Osamu is unable to answer.
“I'll see you tomorrow at the restaurant," you conclude with a soft smile.
“Hmm, see ya.”
You're afraid to see disappointment on your friend's face so you don't turn back. Everything will be perfect from now on, just like it was before the break up. You are going to be happy and loved and cherished.
The knot in your stomach is normal, you try to convince yourself, there is nothing to worry about.
Absolutely nothing.
author notes: i won't get mad if you want to scream at me :)
Elie
taglist: @wolffmaiden, @obibiwan, @teyvatsunsets, @sugacor3, @hanadulsetaad
#suna rintarou#suna rintaro x y/n#suna rintarou x reader#suna hq#suna haikyuu#suna rintarō#suna rintaro haikyuu#suna rintarou angst#haikyuu fanfiction#haikyuu#miya twins#miya osamu#miya atsumu#inarizaki#ojiro aran#kita shinsuke#hq atsumu#hq osamu#hq suna#hq x reader#suna angst#suna fanfic#suna x reader#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu suna#suna#suna rintarou x you
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I'm so tired of people trying to convince me to like characters. I'll say I don't like Belphie because he killed us and get a bunch of comments like: "Oh well, he was going through alot of trauma and he apologized for manipulating and murdering us in cold blood!" Okay, and? Still murdered and manipulated us and then had the nerve to cuddle up on us right after like nothing happened.
I'm not saying you can't like a character and it's not childish to hold a grudge against a fictional character. Belphie was a villain in the story. Villains are made to be disliked, at least at first. Not to mention his redemption was rushed and halfed-assed.
Also I hate the argument that I should keep that same energy for Barbatos and Diavolo since they willingly sent us to our death or Levi, Beel, and Lucifer since they attempted to kill/harm us.
Guess what? I don't care. They are fictional. I can pick and choose who I want to like or not. It is not harming anybody to not liking a fictional, unfeeling character. A person doesn't lack of media literacy or have a misunderstanding of a character just because they don't like them. The sooner people understand that the less issues this already problematic fandom will have.
#obey me#obey me drabble#obey me belphegor#obey me rant#rant post#obey me one master to rule them all
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aita for trying to play matchmaker? for context, this all happened months ago but is coming back now. about halfway through my (18F) senior year of high school, my friend L (also 18F) started crushing on a boy she sat with in math class (18M). she only admitted it to me and the rest of our friend group after we begged her to tell us who she liked for weeks, but in hindsight, it was sort of obvious she really likes him. i have a lot of candid pics on my phone of her glancing over at him during class when she wasn't paying attention but that's beside the point. she wasn't making any moves at all to let him know how she felt and start going out with him, so after a while, we decided to give her a little push. we encouraged her, made subtle hints towards him that someone in class had a crush on him, and when that still wasn't enough, i wrote a love letter for her to sign and give to him. it was easy. prom was a couple of months away by that point and if she was going to struggle so hard to find the words, it made sense for her to just give him a note telling him what she wanted to say. but still, L was stubborn and continued to claim that she wasn't interested in dating at all. apparently she didn't like him *that* much and she was happy just being friends with him (not very convincing when she was constantly making googly eyes at him). she's always been shy, though, and if she doesn't get out of her shell, she's never going to survive in college. for more motivation, i gave her a time limit: if she didn't sign her love letter and give it to him within two weeks, i was going to go up to him and tell him that she liked him. the time game and on the final day, she told me she did it. i trusted her even though she was acting suspicious (barely speaking to him, practically running out of the class they shared together that day, avoiding the friend group for most of the day) but i found out after talking to him later that she lied to me and actually threw the note away. when i confronted her the next day, she apologized and told me that she was terrified i would actually tell him about her crush (i was joking about that, and it hurt that she didn't trust me). out of spite, she ended up asking out one of her childhood friends to prom as her platonic date just so she could say "oh no, sorry, but i already have a date" whenever we tried to help her get with her crush in the future. prom and graduation passed, and the two of them haven't talked much since. i thought this whole situation was over with, but recently, L has been avoiding all of us and makes excuses to not hang out with us. we only have so much time together before she moves out of state for college, so i got a mutual friend to check on her and see what's up. apparently, L's still holding a grudge about how we tried to set her up with the boy. she claims that she was so stressed out for all of senior year that she started getting constant nightmares because of us, and she's upset we never respected her boundaries. however, i think that she's overexaggerating. if it was that serious, she knows that she can always just talk to us instead of keeping it all in so she can make me out to be the bad guy to other people. besides, we were doing what was best for her. he was the first guy she's ever had a crush on, and L has a history of letting her shyness get the better of her. i didn't want her to miss out on this opportunity to be happy, and if she just took our advice instead of acting childish, i'm sure she would have thanked us. i reached out to tell her i'm sorry if she thought i was being too pushy, but it's been days and she still hasn't replied to me. aita?
What are these acronyms?
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# to tell you the truth
04 — strangers with memories
smau masterlist ∗ previous chapter ∗ next chapter
was it foolish for you to assume that you wouldn’t encounter anyone you knew while working at a bookstore less than a kilometre away from your university?
probably.
be it anyone else, you most definitely wouldn’t have reacted this dramatically. but of course it had to be itoshi rin, coincidentally the one guy you wanted to avoid at all costs. you haven't seen the guy in person since high school graduation, and this was definitely not how you expected it to go.
when you first realized it was him back at the bookstore, you quickly bowed and turned around to pack up your belongings, hoping he got the message. it irked you to even spare a single glance at his face, as his features dug up memories that you worked too hard to bury. knowing rin, you expected him to leave immediately after to avoid interacting with you, but to your surprise, the athlete walked over expressionless and casually placed 2 books down.
“these two," he pauses and inhales, "please.”
you held back a very strong urge to gasp; never in a million years would you have ever believed that the itoshi rin would ever say that 6 letter word to you. what was this guy up to? was he trying to deploy reverse psychology or something?
“okay.” you pursed your lips, and scanned his books. “are you signed up for our membership program?”
he merely nods.
you raise an eyebrow. so it isn’t his first time here?
as he punches in his phone number, you take the moment to examine his figure out of curiosity, though not much as changed about him since high school. you do notice that his eyes seem half-lidded, and you hate it so much how the first thought that comes to mind is the fact that it’s past his regular bedtime.
"what are you even doing here..." you mumble subconsciously a little too loudly, widening your eyes immediately after as if you had asked yourself that question. (though it wasn't really a question and more of a complaint)
rin scoffs, breaking his stupid act. "buying books? obviously?"
"did you have to come to this store?" the receipt starts coming out and you place it in a bag with the books, handing it over to him reluctantly after. "and this late too?"
he snatches the bag from you with more force than needed. "why does it matter to you? shouldn't you be grateful i'm even giving you business?"
"gee. wow. thanks."
"you better be."
you roll your eyes at him. "thought you still slept at 8 like an old person.”
"thought you were smarter than to assume nothing's changed." rin furrows his brows, narrowing his eyes at you.
shrugging, you rest your head on the back of your palm and stare at him. "i just thought you still had no life. and i'm not wrong about that, am i?"
he grits his teeth and you find yourself smirking at his exasperation, until he says, "at least what i do with my life gets me results, miss second place."
he did not just say that.
you retract your arm from the desk to cross them, a scowl adorning your face. "watch your words, itoshi. you better savour that moment as much as you can because it's not happening again."
rin smiles sarcastically before turning around and leaving. you scoff, but it isn’t until you hear the bell of the door ring that you feel safe enough to exhale. there was no way that that just happened right now. you were so focused on not trying not embarrass yourself in front of rin that it slipped your mind what books he bought, but it didn’t matter anyway. why did you even care if you embarrassed yourself in front of him? every memory about what happened then has been locked away, and you swear that you wouldn't hold a childish grudge anymore. the only reason why you still act bitter to him is because he suddenly keeps scoring higher than you, and your pride refuses to back down to him.
rin’s just an annoying guy who just keeps getting lucky in school, that’s all.
a notification from reo brings you back to reality, reminding you that you’re technically working overtime now and you need to close up as soon as possible.
as you walk out of the door, you fish out your phone and respond to incoming texts from the groupchat, humming to yourself as music played in your ears. the route home is more than familiar enough to you, but you still take a glance at the area around the bookstore just in case. there’s a park, a ramen store, an aesthetic cafe, and a convenience store that someone dressed in all black is exiting. that’s unusual, you think, because it’s late, and this neighbourhood is fairly secluded.
then you remember who was just at your store and would be in the proximity of the area.
hurriedly, you turn around and speedwalk in the direction of your apartment. he shouldn’t have seen you, right?
there’s a slight rustling of leaves and you warily steal a quick glance behind you without thinking.
why on earth is itoshi rin walking behind you now?
notes: hi sorry it’s late i fg LOL n e ways i don't like this !!! but writer block is killing me and i need to write something so bear with this t-t you get the idea anyways (barely proof but its ok)
pairing ∗ itoshi rin x f!reader
synopsis — all you wanted was a peaceful and productive uni life, but despite your pleas, your plans start crumbling when the star of the football team, itoshi rin, begins to beat you in every aspect possible. as you confront the inevitable, what happens when you uncover secrets behind an unforgettable event from the past?
taglist ∗ send an ask / comment to be added or removed
@kitorin @starthz @jleijl @rintosei @strawberrypockybox @beanxiv @ode2rin @h4nman @hanmastattoos @kaitfae @idk-bro-gay @piichuu @wishiknewwhatiwasdoingwithmylife @invictax @chaosinanutshell @exatse @kirameki-kumo @heartsoji @mellozhi @certaindreampost @limerence-lu @nutsinspector @kawaii-angelanne @rroxii @saesins @anngelllla @anurst @y-sabell-a @hellothere9597 @evilenchantresss @msameikanevaeh (if your name is in bold it means i can't tag you)
#❝ to tell you the truth . . . ❞#itoshi rin smau#blue lock smau#bllk smau#blue lock x reader#blue lock#blue lock x y/n#blue lock x you#blue lock rin#itoshi rin x y/n#itoshi rin x reader#itoshi rin x you#bllk#itoshi rin#rin itoshi x reader#rin itoshi x you#rin itoshi#bllk x reader#bllk x you#bllk x y/n#blue lock imagines
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Hi do u mind doing reading for jungkook and his future spouse like what attract them to each other what do they like most about their personality or could be physical feature about each other.
Hi there :) Thank you so much for sending your ask! Of course, let's have a look: ♡ Want a personal reading? Check out my Ko-fi
This reading ended up being based on their first meeting (or first few meetings)
What will attract Jungkook to his fs
Ace of wands, 6 of wands, temperance, 9 of pentacles 10 of cups.
Jungkook did not come to play! The man will be smitten by this person from the get go! His FS has this allure to them that he will find irresistible and I honestly feel like it’ll be the smaller things. Yes the way they look but also the way they smell the way that their presence is above everyone else’s. But this person won’t even be trying hard at all! They will just be enjoying themselves and still they are all that Jungkook is able to see. They do seem to naturally draw people in, we have spoken before about how this person has a femme fatale feel to them however, on the flip side of that this is someone who has a very grounding and easy presence. Around them, you feel like you can just be yourself because they just simply are themselves too. Jungkook will find this extremely attractive, the way that he can just be himself. They may even have a lot of patience and it will somehow be very obvious that this person is trying to not be rude and talk to everyone. Their energy just seems so magnetic. The 10 of cups is very stable emotional energy, and so Jungkook may feel like this person has it all together or that they don’t have a lot of baggage. I feel like this person will be wearing a dress when they first meet?!
What will Jungkook find attractive about his fs
The sun, queen of pentacles, 10 of wands and tower
This person can be very childish in a very endearing and adorable way sometimes. They have an intensity that doesn’t scare people away, instead, it warms them up and he loves this. Personality-wise, this is someone who tries to keep everything in so that they don’t worry those around them, and they only let certain people in which he also really likes - probably because it makes him feel special. The tower…to be honest I see this card being about Jungkook more so than the fs…this person is going to turn his world upside down! In terms of the physical…this person has a very well-defined waist! They either have an hour-glass body OR they naturally have curvy hips but he just wants to sneak an arm around this person’s waist and claim them from the get-go. This person has a lot of earth and fiery vibes?! Potentially an earth sign with either a fire moon or ascendant or has a heavy earth/fire chart. The main thing that is coming through is that this person has a tiny spark in their eyes, and omg he loves the way this person looks when golden-hour hits them! This got weirdly specific…
What will attract the fs to Jungkook
This person knows that Jungkook is looking up to them and putting them on a pedestal, this will actually make him stand out?! This is someone who definitely likes the attention but interestingly enough they may not know how to behave when they have this attention?! Jungkook is going to come across as looking and being very well put together and taking charge. I don’t know if he is going to boss someone around?! But he may actually try to which will make the fs laugh! It will be important to make this person laugh! I also see Jungkook coming across as a bit of an open book, he will lay everything on the table and not hide any secrets from the fs from the get go! Jungkook is also going to come across as someone who doesn’t hold grudges and who is very willing to let things go. Someone who is able to heal from the past and mature.
What will the fs find attractive about Jungkook
7 of swords, high priestess, knight of pentacles in reverse, queen of cups.
All of these cards have some sort of head piece, so Jungkook may very well be wearing a hat when they first meet? It seems like the fs finds this attractive, but I also keep getting drawn to the eyes of the people displayed on the cards. It seems like whatever hat Jungkook will be wearing will be showing just enough of his eyes, and the fs will really like holding eye contact with him. LEGS! Maybe Jungkook will be wearing something that shows off his long legs?! Because this person will definitely notice how tall he is and how tiny he makes them feel. In terms of non-physical attraction, the energy that flows between the two of them! Jungkook may even come across as a little cheeky and geedy which will make the fs giggle. The interaction that I keep seeing is JK being cheeky which makes the fs laugh then JK smiling softly at them laughing with very sweet and soft eyes.
All the love <3
#bts tarot#kpop tarot#jungkook tarot#jk tarot#jungkook fs#jk fs#jk fs meeting#jk tarot meeting#jeon jungkook#all jk questions!
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Someone literally said that Alicent requested to see the baby and wouldn't have killed or hurt him once she saw.
I don't think they understand that people are not enraged at this scene because they think Saint Alicent is gonna kill a baby but because:
They baby was only minutes old, easily vulnerable to sickness infection and other harm.
Rhaenyra as the person who just gave birth minutes ago is also vulnerable and could have easily slipped or fallen because of pain
' she asked to see the baby not Rhaenyra' literally shut the fuck up ( not you but the people who continue to say bs like that) what mother would allow there new born to be in a room with a woman who is not only her enemy but also holds years long of childish grudges against her for something that a) isn't her business b) the king delt with it, he is her parent not Alicent
Alicent is is surrounded by crazy people. Crispin butt hurt and ser foot fetish, even I'll be scared to give my minutes old baby to her.
5) she knows of Rhaenyra's trauma about the birthing bed, knew how aemma died yet still had the audacity to pull this jerk like move.
Question for tg, if the roles were reversed what would y'all have done? Y'all would have been out for Rhaenyra' blood for sure. So why is it different when Alicent does it. Show Alicent was the victim in the start but slowly become the victimizer near the end.
Rhaenyra had literally yet to deliver the placenta when Alicent demanded to see the baby. This was the third time this had happened, as we can gather from Leanor's words, so Alicent knew Rhaenyra would come with the baby.
Alicent was only in her position because Aemma died. And Aemma would have died of childbirth even if she hadn't been cut open. Aemma suffered two miscarriages, gave birth to two stillborn children and two who died in the cradle. This was known, known, and Alicent, as Rhaenyra's former friend, knew it. And that's why her actions were so cruel and disgusting. Yes, Rhaenyra had two surviving children. But Rhaenyra also survived, and her siblings did not, so she was never sure if her baby would survive the first few days, or even hours. Her mother died of childbirth, two of her grandmothers died of childbirth. It was even harder for her than for any other mother. Alicent might not care and could give up her baby herself a few minutes after birth if she thought Rhaenyra would do so, but most mothers would disagree with that.
If Alicent wanted to see the baby right now, she could get off her venomous ass and go down the stairs to see it.
#house of the dragon#team black#anti team green#hotd#pro team black#anti alicent hightower#anti team green stans
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Jacob black from twilight would be the perfect yandere! He already has the obsessiveness, protective thing down. Especially when his pack told Bella about all the obsessive rants he has in his head because of the mind link.. he went against family, his self worth, his reasoning for a person he was in love with! That wasn’t even his imprint!
Jacob black would treat his imprint like the LOVE of his life. Just pure royal treatment from him mainly because he’s happy to have found his soulmate (TRUE soulmate) and because the scars that Bella left on him were still fresh. His self worth and image were messed up beyond belief so he’s prone to quick jealousy and moments of insecurity. Hope you are the understanding and assuring type because he isn’t gonna think twice about scaring off people who are “too friendly”. Hell even some of his pack get some glares and growls directed at them. He trusts that they won’t do anything but those thoughts of jealousy still make him subconsciously act.
Babe don’t even LOOK at the Cullens. He is behind you at every turn and with his deep grudge he holds against almost ALL vampires (mostly Edward) Jacob is going to immediately assume they’re coming after you next. Don’t look at them, don’t talk about them, don’t even THINK about them. Like honey he is either gonna guilt trip you to the MAX or he’s going to go on a vampire killing spree.
He’s almost closed off. At the start. The more you spend time with him, the more he’ll open up to you bit by bit. Don’t lie to him because if he finds out then your 10 steps back to where you started. Closed short replies and him just stalking you wherever you go instead of walking beside you if he catches you in a lie. The best type of person I see him being with is an honest, kind and devoted person. Like DEVOTED. The type where he asks, “were the cullens there?” In a accusatory tone only for you to go. “No, besides if they were I would just leave. You said they’re bad news right?” Something along those lines is the perfect answer. It shows you TRUST him and his reasons for not liking them. Not as if you don’t have a brain and can’t think for yourself but more like you respect that he has a bad history with them and just don’t want to upset him. He’ll appreciate you beyond words.
A sweet darling that lifts him up and can handle his protective tendencies. You are his WORLD, how can he NOT be worried about you 25/8?? Expect him to run up your phone bill with his check ins and his NEED to touch you always. An arm around you, or your waist or just on your arm. But if you hold his hand he’ll have to hide his childish smile. It’s so cute and loving to feel you hold him back. To feel you WANT to touch him. It’s been so long since he felt someone show him CLEARLY that they are into him. Kiss him. Anywhere. Jacob is a sucker for affection like that. After his patrols or even just a rough and tumble his favorite things is having you fret over him. Not in a naggy way (even though he would still love it) but in a “am I pressing too hard? Tell me and I’ll let up. I’m gonna touch the second bruise okay? I’m sorry I’m sorry!” As you apply ointment and bandages over his wounds. No matter how little. It’ll have him looking at you with the most loving gaze. He’s a shape shifter with unbelievable strength and you think you are CAPABLE of hurting him? It’s cute. YOU’RE too cute.
#twilight#yandere twilight#yandere#yandere shitpost#yandere x you#yandere imagine#yandere x reader#yandere imagines#yandere ramblings#yandere Jacob black#Jacob black#jacob black imagines#yandere Jacob black imagine#yandere x willing! reader
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