#I call my mother on this phone
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there is a person standing 73 yards some distance away, watching you. they look like they’re trying to tell you something. you can’t get away from them, nor can you get close to them. they’re just...standing there.
so your friends and loved ones try to help you by talking to them, and the person must be saying something to them, because they look at you differently now. but you have no idea what it was, all you hear is static.
you try to tell them not to listen to the person, but no matter what you do, no matter how much you plead with them, they look up at you with suspicion-hatred-fear and just run. they don’t care where they’re going, just that you’re not there. and you can’t do anything to stop it.
the more that the people in your life care about you, the worse it is, because anyone who tries to help is turned against you. so you are just gradually shut out of your own life by the people you love the most, until eventually you no longer recognize your surroundings.
there is a person standing 73 yards some distance away, watching you.
#doctor who#doctor who spoilers#ruby sunday#carla sunday#73 yards#idk what this is#I just had to get something out when I saw the part with ruby’s mother running away from her with that cold look in her eyes#and that fucking phone call godddd#me: “hm I wonder why this episode about people turning against you and running away for an unknown reason is hitting me so hard”#like oh yeah it’s the rejection sensitive dysphoria. this is literally my worst fear#anyway BACK TO THE EPISODE#my writing#?? I guess#mine#100#500#1000
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Love and hate can sometimes cross wires - DPXDC Ficlet
She props her up against the far wall, and kneels before her, fingers deceptively gentle against her cheek. Danyal is cold and trembling, her once bronze skin now dull. She meets her other half— self— sister— mother— predecessor’s eyes, and they are still wet. But now they are sharp, focused on Her face.
Danyal takes a shuddering breath, one that wracks itself down her spine. One that She can feel sinking into her — their? — shared soul. “You’re going to kill me.” She says, matter of fact, something like grief choking in her voice, making it shake.
She blinks at Her mother—sister—friend— predecessor, a feeling She knows is horror but thinks is hatred filling up Her lungs. Her cool palm trails kind down to her throat, Her talon fingers wrapping around the fragile skin. With very little effort, She could break her little neck. “Yes.” She murmurs, a sound only the two of them can hear. “I am.“
Her mother-sister-other half— predecessor shudders again, and yet makes no sound. Simply goes limp with acceptance in her arms. She doesn’t bother to even fight; she looks tired. Make it quick, it’s like she says.
I will. She promises, running the gentle padding of Her thumb along her jugular. It’s the only mercy She thinks She’ll ever give. But first…
“Give me a name?”
(Mother— sister— mine—) Danyal stares at Her, confusion parting her slowly paling lips. There’s silence between the two, thickening the air like the rise of an oncoming storm. Hurt and rage begins to toil beneath Her skin. Was the thought of naming Her so abhorrent, that she’d rather not say a thing at all? Her name is nothing?
Before She can take Her anger out, Danyal breathes in sharp. The sound is painful, jarring like jags of broken glass. She raises a hand, her palm — rough and calloused, proof of her fourteen years of life, of hardship — finds Her cheek too. It’s almost loving, the way Danyal swipes her thumb across Her skin, her clammy fingers tucking a strand of hair behind Her ear.
An emotion sweeps across her, boiling and toiling, burning hot and consuming her whole. Thick, bubbling in her throat, curling behind her teeth and under her tongue and tinging her peripherals with spots. An overwhelming emotion.
It must be hatred, she thinks. What other feeling can encompass one so much?
When Danyal breathes out, so with it comes a name; “Layal.”
Danyal always did love the nights.
(If you ask the Mother of Monsters why she killed Danyal al Ghul, she’ll tell you it was because she loved hated her.)
#dpxdc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dp x dc#dpxdc crossover#dp x dc crossover#danyal al ghul au#dpxdc ficlet#dpxdc prompt#mother of monsters danny#fem danyal al ghul#fem danny fenton#mother of monsters au#dpdc#love and hate aren’t opposites they’re sisters and friends#you know i usually dont care about dan that much but layal has made a special place in my hesrt#new blorbo unlocked: my hyperspecific handpicked au dan#killing your human half-mother-sister-friend can be so intimate you know#dpxdc dan phantom#dan phantom#sorry if its confusing i purposely avoided calling Layal by name because before that point she didn’t have one#layal is arabic for ‘the nights’#i originally thought that Layal would be much crueler. mockingly demanding dany for a name before she killed her. i changed my mind#tags are short because im on vacation and typing this on my phone#wrote this in my notes app at 11PM last night
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Please tell me Drew has given CatNap the finger, or some other sort of insult. (That might've almost ended in death.) Shame the last thing he sees won't be Drew's fabulous Minecraft Creeper (Aw man.) boxers. Ú-Ù
Absolutely.
“I think I took a few years off my life, I laughed so hard! Ah… stuff’s funny as hell, I’ll tell you what.”
#Drew is a sucker for unorthodox insults and threats#he totally called Miss Delight a ‘broom-headed banana-bitch’ while running from her#Mommy was ‘Arcade Sticky Hand headass’#(he definitely hasn’t threatened to shove concrete down someone’s throat when he was stressed totally not)#(it was Ollie LMAOAOAOA)#‘Ollie I stg if you don’t quick backseating I will shove this phone so far up my ass that you’ll hear my food digesting’#Drew does not trust that kid ONE. BIT.#gotta be the prototype ong#THAT MOTHER FUCKER IS NOT REAL#ask the three d’s#the three d’s#drew poppy playtime#catnap poppy playtime#catnap#poppy playtime#poppy playtime chapter 3#poppy playtime fanart#phrart#art#ask phrog
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nothing is worse than none of your friends being online like how dare you
#for one of them it’s like ten am & too early to socialize#another it’s two am and he better be asleep#another she is Busy and how dare she not be a phone call away#another is AWAY AT SEA#one of them has like a functional family and will be interacting at this time#all my sisters are busy#i am not desperate enough to chat with my mother#WHAT AM I MEANT TO DO#personal
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#suburræterna#suburræterna spoilers#suburra#spadino anacleti#mesut#one of the reasons i couldn't really connect with mesut#is that he always seems so reserved#when spadino tells him about his mother being killed by angelica#during their phone calls#in these more physical scenes#and it adds to the whole ominous impression he gives#i mean#his eyes are soft when he looks at spadino#he seems genuinely worried about him#and still#of course there are only two scenes of them being intimate in any way#but spadino reaches for him first in both#my gifs
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#not to be a broken lil man on main#but I was on the phone with my dad for 30 minutes just now (that's a lot for a phone call with him) and like.... damn. yeah. i do have one#parent who's not horrible huh#we talked a lot about my plans for the future...... which I only now told him bcs scary and bcs........ I never ever during my 25 years of#being alive got the impression from my parents that something like this would be an acceptable career choice or something they'd support#and I mean. my [redacted] of a mother is the best example for how. not alright it is with her that I'm doing something that's not very...#traditional for this family#but anyways. my dad was absolutely fucking lovely#to the point that I get getting teary eyed and felt my throat closing up cause. huh. i guess in his own way he does love me and believe in#he asked me to send him a link or a pdf of my first conference report because he wants to keep it somewhere 😭😭😭😭😭😭#I'm....... ouch. ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch#you know the ghosting I am really good at with tumblr chats (sorry guys. ilu. I just suck at communication)???? i'm also extremely good at#that with whatsapp chats and just. not calling my irl loved ones#so idk. hearing him say he understands and just wanted to make sure I wasn't upset with him and like. wanted to know if I was doing okay.#damn. okay. damn#idk#this was such a good talk and he was so suppertive and non-judgemental and I actually told him about my birthday and how my mother's call#upset me and he was like. yeah. same. and like... he's basically gone no contact with her as well as it turns out#idk. I really should give him more credit and like... I feel like there's so much shifting and change and development happening while I'm n#not there and sometimes it's hard to remember that he actually /could/ understand some things. just cause I've always been so used to not#sharing anything about myself because it wasn't safe when I was younger and... idk........ lots of emotions going on rn#so glad we talked though. so glad#simon.out.#if you read all this.... idk man.... sorry for oversharing but thanks for caring ig <3
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longlegs is a movie about mother/daughterhood for real. throws up thinking about it actually
#LONGLEGS SPOILERS IN THE TAGS#Dont look if you dont want spoilers plsssss <3#didnt looooove it btw i have my mixed feelings and criticisms but! i did like it. and liked a lot about it...#feeling left with this dreadful feeling about being trapped in childhood and trauma and your mother trying to keep you there#and doing so much so you Can grow up but still not really letting you and keeping all of you in her house and keeping your memories of -#certain events to 'protect' you and just making it harder for you and then keeping up with these phone calls and of course doing all of -#what she did to keep her little girl alive so she could grow up and none of it mattered as long as her little girl got to grow up and be -#herself and not have to worry about all of those things shes doing or that happened... even though they still directly affect her and make#her life a living hell... shes tormented by it... and phone calls and interactions with her mother feel terrible... but she loves her#and she trusts her and she doesnt know what to do with her... or how to feel... and she wants answers andhgkshdfk GAHH its good#all of lees hair and teeth and nails and all of her things from childhood still in that house... in her room... all of her memories are in#that room... including clues to That One... god#longlegs spoilers#longlegs 2024 spoilers
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{ Happy 26th birthday to me. }
#{ I got scared awake by a phone call from my mother being like 'I'm coming over!' }#{ So I am fully awake now with a blip of anxiety that will fade very quickly. }#{ But other than that... I can't believe I'm already 26. }#{ More than halfway to 30. Gah. }#{ If y'all wanna send me birthday wishes or talk to me or whatever feel free to do so! }#{ Obviously you don't have to! Just if you want to. Please don't force yourself to just because you see this post. }#{ I'm waiting for my mom to get here so we can just yabber together about me being older. }#{ MY SISTER ALSO MADE ME A PUFFY CLAY FROG WIZARD WITH A RED HAT. }#{ It's the cutest shit ever. }#{ I love it and placed it next to my Tails figure. }#{ The Magical Wizard of Soybean is what we jokingly call it. }#{ Cause I have a Yu-Gi-Oh OC named Sawyer who loves frogs and her best male friend calls her Soybean as a niclname. }#{ Anyway- back to talking to Vira on Discord. }#{ Happy 7 Month Birthday to our new dog Leia as well. }#{ We share a birthday only once this month since her birthday isn't actually in August. }#{ I gotta give her a cookie when we have cake though. }#✠ [ ' ᴛʜᴇ ᴏɴᴇ ᴡʜᴏ ʟᴇᴀᴅs ʙᴇʜɪɴᴅ ᴄʟᴏsᴇᴅ ᴅᴏᴏʀs. ' ] - ✡ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴏғ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀ ✡
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My brain fog has dissipated enough for one (1) singular baby Akashi headcanon. My headcanon is that when he was really young, Akashi would sneak into his father's closet to put on his blazers and ties and pretend to be a big boss. His mother definitely took pictures when she found out what he was doing.
#just imagining an itty bitty akashi walking around the house in a blazer 50 billions sizes too big#and he probably walked around pretending to make important phone calls#i bet he also tried to sit in his fathers work chair in his office and was too small to get on by himself so his mother had to help him on#so baby akashi is taking pretend phonecalls at his fathers desk while scribbling “notes” on a blank piece of paper#and masaomi is conflicted with being exasperated and being proud#okay times up my brain has had enough#thank you for listening#kuroko no basket#knb headcanons#akashi seijuro
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Sometimes caring So Much feels like a curse in this cruel world. but sometimes it allows me to connect with other people who also care A Lot and together we actually are able to make a difference. And that is literally the best feeling in the entire world.
#i'm just some woman with a committee addiction. pay it no mind.#This is a post about an injustice you've probably never heard of. it reflects larger injustices but this particular one impacts <100 ppl#A few weeks ago i realised that if i couldn't do something about this one...it would change me forever.#I couldn't not TRY to do something. Obviously. but also if my efforts had no impact? it would ruin my life. a bit.#after weeks of teeth gritting work and looking into several more weeks of it to come I'm going to take a moment to pause and say:#we're getting somewhere. we're really getting somewhere.#ugh i sound so dramatic. I guess it is dramatic. but w/e#im not gonna talk about local politics & organising because im not an idiot#but the siren call of posting ...!#causes me to say vague shit that sounds so much more dramatic than if I just. told u what im up to.#most of which is having hour long phone conversations with my mother where one of us is crying#and sending lots of texts#and BEING IN A UNION. EVERYONE JOIN A UNION.#me fein
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pours one out for myself and all my followers who maybe also can’t get through a single fucking mother’s day without going to pieces just at the thought of having to speak to our mothers
fuck this holiday
#ray.txt#getting too personal on main even if i am not going into the deets but#i fucking hate mother’s day and i hate having to fake my happiness even if it’s just for the duration of one phone call
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pls i need to provide updates
#basically yesterday night was chaharshanbe suri . which is a solar new yr tradition where we let go of the past suffering in our year#and like...start the new yr w fresh vigour . anyway so my friend was at the event and we were abt to leap over the fire#and she was like bro im im glad u blocked her (situationship) etc etc . and then. my phone started vibrating. and i look at it. and my f#friend looks at it. and its her. and were both like what the fuck?? i blocked her things r Over and anyway so i pick up the phone and shesl#acting like nothing happened (bc nothing DID happen for her) and she was like ohh ur doing chaharshanbe suri im not doing anything etc what#are ur new yr plans so i jusr .IDK WHY I DID THIS . but ig i didnt wanna come off as like lonely i said probably hanging out w family and#friends maybe reading poetry together . et cetera and she was like wait that sounds so fun why didnt u invite me!#LIKE WDYM YOUVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY MAKING IT CLEAR U DONT WANT TO BE IN MY PRESENCE . and i told her that after#everything i thought she didnt want to see me again and she was like you always think that 😐 . like. ?? ok anyway so she expects me to#invite her . and like. there is an above 0% but sub-5% chance she will actually show up . but the panic that gripped me#i started making calls to my friends asking them if they can come on the 23rd bc there must be an event and also i asked my mother#and she said actually yeah i am doing a thing on the 23rd :D it involves over 16 ppl (we live in a v small flat) of which like...7 are kids#so you wont have space to be in ur own room let alone invite others. which tbh like ...being around a bunch of loud kids doesnt seem fun fo#any of my friends or me etc so i thought maybe i should arrange things so that we all go out together and if she shows up she shows up 🤷♀️#but . im so. WHY DID I SAY THAT . i had to panic-call my research partner and ask him to get from oxf to where i live on the 23rd#and when he heard the explanation he like. the light in his voice disappeared 💀 but he potentially agreed so idk#THE ISSUE IS. 23rd im supposed to also have . a date#w this girl that i had a huge crush on when i was 15-16 (posted abt this b4 but id get shitty black coffee in the mornings just to spend a#few more minuted w her each day and she was the cleverest girl in school and she cared abt nothing but her academics but now shes very gay#scraggly homosexual etc etc shes cute) and YEAH IDK#like id have to go there on the date come back fast meet ppl POTENTIALLY (again under 5%) meet situationship girl#like is that even doable#but the thing is it would be so so so funny bc all of my friends dislike her sooo much#.........what if i invited the girl im supposed to have a date w over to hang out w us#god that would be so hilarious and chaotic . i wont do it tho im a mature person x#but it would be soooo funny#I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE TMRW 12:30PM IT IS 10:49PM RN I HAVENT STARTED IT bc i was rotting sadly in bed#popped a ritalin pill tho so here we go x#i have found myself in a state of such sheer agony and rage and sorrow and grief over this girl that atp i feel like#its just so entertaining . like i feel vaguely over it? ik nothing will come of it so its like just . have fun . vibe
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Today I asked myself the question:
"What if Zayne's Slut Suit but Grey-er?"
The answer was yes. A very very resounding yes. Because Grey looks good in everything (as long as I don't curse it by trying to draw a full smile 😩 but dont worry cursed Greyson can't hurt you here shhhhh)
#“why did you stop paintint at the skin kay?” shhh shhhh were not gonna talk about that either okay#“are you ever gonna draw another lnds character ever again Kay?” idk man thats up for debate at this point#“but you promised us Caleb-”#😭#okay now that my mental break down after a 5 hour mom-de-force phone call fest is over i can go back to being semi normal#(this drawing was mother's day self care~)#art of kay#can you hear my heart 💙⃤
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going a little insane thinking about that one echo in moxxi's heist that's jack calling his mom on mother's day- a call she very much does not answer- and how much the sadness in his voice when saying goodbye says about him
#borderlands#handsome jack#borderlands 3#dude i love moxxi's heist so much it fed us jack and Timothy lovers SO good#he MISSES his MOM :((((#like this opens up so many questions#did she show back up in his life after she abandoned him?? after he became ceo?? after his name became known as a monster??#does she know hes dead? that her granddaughter killed herself because of him? that he died crying and desperate to be seen?#did they talk at all or did she disown him completely once he first tasted blood?#did she watch the phone ring in silence every time he called her waiting for it to stop so she could breathe?#did they both dread mother's day and birthdays and funerals as much as the other? did either of them know?#was she there to meet his wife- or his second- did she know about nisha? did he tell her? did he wish she was there?#did she mourn her mother knowing he was the one who ordered her to be murdered? did she know her mother abused him?#I Need To Know#gearbox please i am begging on my knees ANYTHING about his mom and his wife please please please#was he loving?? was he a good kid?? was he a good cook or a funny dad?? did he play in the mud or hide under his covers??#PLEASE#ANYTHING#I AM GOING INSANE#i have answers to All Of This in my head but like- any crumb of info about his family would feed me for months#am so normal about this man
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i think i have to force myself to go to bed extra early tonight💀💀
#ok i'm sorry i've been talking abt this bday shit sm#BDAYS JUST MAKE ME NERVOUS OKAYY#like what the fuck i have to hug my dad#.#shgdghsahfdghadhgas#main problem#aaaand then the phone call with mother#and then the texts#hhhhhhhhhh#i mean you guys will save me you don't make me nervous#i love you#it really is just abt the irl stuff#euuuughhhh#like i genuinely feel a bit sick rn#hahggsdahgdghashgdas#IT'S FINEEEEEEEE#it's whateverrrrrr#i'll see how it goes i probably won't fall asleep though........#hhhhhhhhhhhhh#mayor of loserville
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One thing I did not expect tho was how incredibly smooth Cornelius was in his side story with Leonore. u///u
#ascendance of a bookworm#p4v7#HE WAS SO SMOOTH#I HAD TO PUT MY PHONE DOWN BC I GOT FLUSTERED#I FELT LIKE MURIELLA AND LUEURADI#‘i don’t think they’ll go to waste. if you’ll embroider my cape that is’#DAMN SON THAT WAS SMOOTH#telling her she doesn’t need her highbeast because she can ride his#calling her cute#going to the gazebo which shows he reads his mother’s stories#quoting the book for her and recreating a scene#sharing mana through hand holding#cornelius how scandalous >//u//<#i was not prepared for that side story at all#reading platonic love for 19 volumes only to get punched in the gut with something so overtly romantic#i doubled over and died
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