#I am. So so so sorry for how long this took
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noellez-best-life23 · 1 day ago
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first sorry it took me so long to read this life is hectic and i wanted to really sit down and enjoy it anyways im so excited to read this i love ari and i love apple orchards
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“Lift your skirt for me, darling,” he implored, his eyes dropping to where your thighs were still spread, the flimsy fabric of your dress barely hiding your core. “Show daddy what you have under your pretty little skirt.” I'm already screaming
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You fell back into your seat with a soft “oomph,” the breath rushing from your lungs when you looked into Ari’s eyes. His blue gaze was softer than you’d ever seen it, and there was something in depths of his eyes that you couldn’t quite place—affection or fondness maybe. is that love I'm sensing maybe
“Do you trust me, darling?” Ari asked, cupping your face and leaning across the car’s console to press his forehead to yours. His thumb stroked gently over your cheek, matching the sweeping of his other thumb against the back of your hand ok this is where i start swooning asking about the trust the whole forehead touching this is whole part is so sweet
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he asked softly, planting his other hand on the hood of his car, i cant be the only one who thinks its hot when a guy does this can i (maybe i am) (also couldn't find a gif)
“Should I go back for another basket—or a crate?” Ari asked, a grin in his tone. this part is so fluffy and sweet like ari is just so sweet in this
Good girl,” Ari murmured, taking the apple from your hands and pulling away to set it on top of the pile in your basket im now melting
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my god the quickie in the orchid is so hot i think im dead
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“You know you’re special to me, don’t you, honey?” he asked, using the new pet name that you knew was shortened from ‘honeycrisp’. and we are back to swooning and sweetness
ok so i absolutely loved this it was a perfect mix of sweet and fluff and spice and then they realization that its wasn't ari that was making the boundaries and they reader was just scared to let ari in and how patient he is and there is just so much details in here the way you describe stuff makes me able to really see the story in my head but yeah this was amazing and i love it
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sweet as honeycrisp
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pairing: sugar daddy!ari levinson x sugar baby!female reader
summary: your sugar daddy takes you on an autumn-themed date to the apple orchard, and what starts off as a fun and flirty day unfolds into a meaningful turning point in your relationship.
warnings: 18+ content (minors dni!!!), established sugar daddy/sugar baby relationship, smut, unprotected sex, semi-public sex, piv sex, outdoor sex, creampie, oral sex (f receiving), fingering (f receiving), finger sucking, biting, brief cockwarming, exhibitionism, light bdsm, dirty talk, daddy kink, praise kink, very light degradation, lots of teasing, pet names (darling, honey), aftercare, happy ending, so much fluff
word count: 14.5k
a/n: whew i've been working on this for like two weeks now, and i'm so happy to finally be able to post it!!! i was struggling a bit with the emotional throughline of this fic, and i only decided on it very late in the editing game so if some things don't make sense, just ignore it!!! if you can believe it, i originally just wanted to write about a quickie in the apple orchard and it turned into this 🫣 anyway, i hope y'all enjoy!!!
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“Kiss.”
The warm, playful voice of your sugar daddy, Ari Levinson, met your ears as you lowered yourself into the passenger seat of his Lexus, greeting you in the way he always did. When you closed the car door behind you, the sounds of the Manhattan street were silenced, leaving you in the relative quiet with Ari.
Eagerly, you twisted on the sumptuous seat of the expensive car to lean over the center console, brushing a teasing kiss to Ari’s scruffy cheek, your lips grazing the edge of his full beard. His skin was warm and inviting, and you lingered for a moment, breathing in the the familiar scent of Ari’s cologne, smelling of vetiver and leather. 
When you pulled back, Ari’s blue eyes were glittering with a hint of mischief that made your heart thump with excitement, a warmth blooming in your core despite the cool air of the car’s air conditioning brushing your legs. It was a warm September day, the last remnants of summer clinging in the air as if it protested giving up its seat to autumn. 
The thought crossed your mind that if any man looked like the embodiment of summer, it was Ari Levinson. His skin was golden with a perpetual tan, and his brown hair had sun-kissed blond highlights that shimmered in the daylight, though they were dimmed a bit in the shadow of his car. 
Still, as he grinned at you, showing off his pearly whites framed by his dark beard, you couldn’t help but feel like the summer sun had taken a liking to you and sat beside you. When he looked at you like that, with that smile and those blue eyes shining like the sun off the ocean waves, you wondered what it would be like to have his attention all the time—to be more than just the sugar baby he took on occasional dates when he wanted to have fun.
Pushing those bothersome romantic notions aside, you raked your eyes down Ari’s form, noticing that he’d dressed down for your date. He wore a soft denim, long-sleeved button-up over a simple white t-shirt and tailored slacks. Casual loafers and sunglasses perched on top of his head completed the look. Even in such a simple outfit, he looked good. 
“Show me.” 
His voice was a deep rumble that pulsed between your thighs, and you flicked your gaze back up to his face, finding heat in his expression, the same mischievousness in his eyes that’d been there since you got in the car. The corner of Ari’s mouth was curved in a smirk, and you felt another throb of warmth in your core.
Your lips curled at the edges, a wicked smile curving your mouth as the energy in the car crackled around you, spurring your heart to beat a little faster. You knew exactly what Ari wanted you to show him, and you knew it was naughty—but that was part of why you liked spending time with your sugar daddy. 
Ari was always urging you to be a little daring, to do something that made your heart race and your breath come a little faster. He didn’t push you, so much as guide you down the path to depravity, and you followed him willingly. You never felt more alive than when you were with Ari.
So while you smiled at him, you spread your legs on the leather seat of his Lexus, the short skirt of your dress falling between your parting thighs. Ari’s smirk deepened with satisfaction as he watched your movements with rapt attention. Your fingers toyed with the edge of your dress, the fabric having ridden up quite high on your thighs. 
But before you could reveal what was beneath your skirt, you looked away from Ari, and it crashed over you that you sat in a car in the middle of a busy Manhattan street surrounded by other people. There were folks driving in their cars just outside your window and others walking by on the sidewalk beside where Ari was parked. There were even people filling up the buildings that overlooked the street. They were everywhere around you.
“Darling, look at me,” Ari murmured, his tone entreating enough to call your attention back to him. 
You noticed his sparkling eyes had lost some of their mischief when you looked back at him. But the steadiness of his gaze had you relaxing when you hadn’t even realized you’d tensed up, and the corners of your mouth flickered in an uncertain smile.
“Do you trust me?” Ari asked simply. His face was open, no hint of pressure in his tone or voice. 
For a brief moment, you considered his question, then you nodded your head. You watched as warmth flooded into his gaze, and it made you feel a little more sure. 
“Lift your skirt for me, darling,” he implored, his eyes dropping to where your thighs were still spread, the flimsy fabric of your dress barely hiding your core. “Show daddy what you have under your pretty little skirt.”
You gathered every ounce of braveness in your body and pulled up the hem of your skirt. There, nestled between your spread thighs, was your bare pussy. The air in the car seemed to heat by a few degrees when you heard Ari suck in a sharp breath.
It had been Ari’s idea for you to go without panties on your date, and you’d agreed, the idea sending excited thrills through your body. Walking through the halls and the lobby of the Manhattan high-rise you called home, you’d felt like you had a secret that only Ari knew, and it gave you a delicious kind of satisfaction showing your sugar daddy how you’d gone without panties, your pussy fully exposed beneath your dress.
“You have such a pretty cunt, darling,” Ari groaned, his hand sliding up your thigh until the tips of his fingers teased the top of your slit. 
You bit back a gasp and squirmed in your seat, trying to hold your hips back from thrusting into his touch. 
“I never get tired of seeing this pussy, and how wet she gets for me.” 
His fingers spread your lower lips and he brushed ever so gently over the tip of your clit, making you twitch in your seat, your legs shaking with the effort it took not to close them on his hand and trap him against your heated core.
“And the way your thighs tremble for me,” Ari rumbled, pulling away from your quickly dampening slit to grope roughly at your plush softness, his grip possessive in a way your sugar daddy rarely was. 
“Ari.” His name was a breathy exhale, an undercurrent of admonishment in your tone as his touches stoked the blazing fire in your core, making you squirm even more on the seat. A sliver of worry wormed into your mind as you remembered the leather you sat on, which would surely stain if he kept touching you, and you gasped, “The seat.”
Ari only chuckled, the sound cavalier in a way that made butterflies take flight in your belly, but before you could chide him again, his hand was slipping back between your thighs. Ari dragged a finger from the bottom of your slit all the way to the top, flicking your clit and wringing a moan from your lips as your thighs trembled on the seat.
Then he was pulling his hand away, leaving you to drop your skirt to cover yourself, and popping his finger into his mouth. Your sugar daddy made a show of savoring the taste of you, and your head fell back against the headrest. You watched him suck your taste from his skin, your breaths heavy in your chest while Ari’s eyes sparkled with mischief. 
“Mm, sweet as apple pie,” he praised, making heat rush to your face while you shook your head and rolled your eyes—even as your chest warmed at the compliment. Ari was grinning shamelessly at you when he grabbed your face gently and pulled you gently across the car toward him. “C’mere, darling, see how sweet you taste,” he murmured against your lips before kissing you.
The musky flavor of your body made you moan into Ari’s mouth, your sugar daddy devouring every little noise you made while he kissed you thoroughly. You sank into him, reveling in the smooth glide of his lips and the possessive exploration of his tongue. Your fingers curled around the collar of his denim shirt and you clung to him, feeling the edge of something more in the way he kissed you. It left you breathless when you finally pulled away.
You fell back into your seat with a soft “oomph,” the breath rushing from your lungs when you looked into Ari’s eyes. His blue gaze was softer than you’d ever seen it, and there was something in depths of his eyes that you couldn’t quite place—affection or fondness maybe. 
A small, uncertain smile curled your lips, your heart thumping in your chest as you wondered if that’s how Ari looked at someone he truly cared about. Someone special to him, who had a more permanent place in his life than the sugar baby he called when he wanted to have some no-strings-attached fun. 
For the briefest of moments, you could pretend Ari was more than your sugar daddy, and you were more than his sugar baby. 
But then the moment ended, and Ari cleared his throat as he looked away, focusing on the wheel and gear shift of his car to put it in drive. A silent sigh of disappointment gusted from you, and you turned toward the passenger side window, intent on watching the city fly by once Ari eased into traffic.
To your surprise, Ari’s hand slipped into one of yours, his palm pressing against yours while he laced your fingers together. Your breath hitched with uncertainty even as the corners of your mouth flickered in a smile. It took you a moment to get used to the feeling of his hand in yours, turning it over to trace the veins on the back gently while he maneuvered his Lexus through the Manhattan streets.
It had only been a few months since you’d started seeing Ari, and while his touches were often greedy when you were fooling around, he hadn’t been prone to physical displays of affection since the first few dates you went on with him. Back then, he’d reached for your hand a few times, but after a point he’d stopped.
Truthfully, it had been a relief. One of your greatest fears was falling for a sugar daddy who didn’t return your feelings, and considering how handsome Ari was, you’d known it was a serious risk getting into a relationship with him. But he’d been so charming and carefree, you didn’t think it would be a problem to keep your heart out of things. He didn’t seem like he was looking for anything serious anyway.
So you’d focused on having fun, and that had been easy. Ari took you to expensive restaurants with delicious food in New York City, or he’d fly you somewhere else if he was itching to get away for a little bit. During meals, you’d chat about trivial things, then fall into bed together as soon as you were back in whatever hotel room Ari had booked for the night. 
You didn’t quite know why your conversations didn’t go deeper than the shallow things you talked about, but you didn’t question it. It made everything so much easier if you didn’t truly know Ari—if he didn’t know you either. So you just stuck to safe topics, like planning dates and having sex. 
Your relationship with Ari was a nice change of pace for you. He was far from your first sugar daddy, and you’d learned some hard lessons in your past relationships. Too often, sugar daddies wanted to know things you weren’t comfortable sharing, but Ari had never pried. He’d set boundaries and didn’t push them. You were grateful for that.
But another part of you, a part that started off small and was growing with every date you went on with Ari, yearned to know more about your sugar daddy. You wanted to know what he liked to do when he wasn’t working or taking you on dates. You wanted to know if he had any family, if he celebrated the holidays with them. You wanted to know if he’d ever had his heart broken. 
Tamping down on those curious thoughts, you focused on the present—the music that was playing gently in the car, and the scenery passing by your window. The skyscrapers and high-rises of Manhattan had given way to the tightly-packed homes of the suburbs. 
Biting your tongue against all the questions you wanted to ask, not even sure how you’d begin to try to get to know your sugar daddy better—let alone whether it was a good idea—you sat in silence with Ari. The suburbs eventually gave way to the lush forests and hilly countryside of the Hudson Valley, giving you something prettier to look at.
It was too early in September for the leaves to be changing yet, but there were glimpses of golden yellows and warm oranges among the green foliage. A hint of what was to come. Autumn was inevitable and you found comfort in the changing seasons. 
Cozy weather was right around the corner, and you couldn’t wait for it. Hot apple cider and pumpkin pie, butterscotch cookies and mulled wine—you were a glutton for all the food and beverages associated with the autumn months. And you liked to make them yourself from scratch whenever possible. 
It was part of the reason you’d wanted Ari to take you apple picking, though he didn’t know that. He’d just accepted the request and planned the date. 
After a little while more of driving, Ari pulled off the paved road and onto a dirt track. There was a sign for Brothers’ Apple Orchard fixed to a worn, wooden fence, though dense trees hid the farm from view. 
A little ways down the dirt road, the trees opened up into a large parking lot that was already packed with families and groups of friends going apple picking on the warm September afternoon. The sight and sounds of all the people had nerves twisting in your stomach, and you wondered if it had been a smart idea to go without panties to a place that was meant for wholesome fun.
You’d long since learned that Ari had an exhibitionist streak, and that day wasn’t the first time he’d told you to show up to one of your dates without panties. You’d always enjoyed the excitement in the inherent risk of wearing a dress without anything underneath, but he’d never taken you somewhere with so many families before. The consequences of getting caught seemed so much worse than they ever had before.
Ari must’ve felt your fingers tense in his because he gave you a comforting squeeze as he pulled his Lexus into an empty space and put the car in park. Once done, he looked to you, his smile faltering when he took in the way your brows were pinched and the corners of your mouth were turned down in an uncertain frown.
“Do you trust me, darling?” Ari asked, cupping your face and leaning across the car’s console to press his forehead to yours. His thumb stroked gently over your cheek, matching the sweeping of his other thumb against the back of your hand. 
You were quiet for a moment, nibbling on your lower lip as you thought about his question—really thought about it.
It weighed on you a little that you didn’t know Ari very well, especially since a part of you desperately wanted to, but that didn’t mean you didn’t know his character. Ari had never pushed you to do something you didn’t want to do, and he always checked in with you when you were together, making sure you were comfortable and having fun. So while you didn’t know his favorite color, you did trust him. 
Exhaling slowly, you nodded, your forehead shifting against Ari’s. “I trust you, Ari,” you said, your voice little more than a whisper, like you were telling him a secret in the privacy afforded by the enclosed space of his car. 
To your surprise, Ari sighed in relief at your words, the exhale so short and quiet, you wondered if you’d heard correctly. But you didn’t have time to analyze it because Ari was pressing a quick kiss to your lips and then pulling back to open his door and step out into the September sunshine.
You watched as Ari rounded the front of the Lexus, a charming grin on his face as he winked at you over the hood of his car. It was only because you were alone that you allowed yourself a silly little giggle, your mouth spreading across your face in a wide smile. He opened your door and offered you a hand to help you out.
“Careful, darling, wouldn’t want to give anyone a free show,” Ari murmured teasingly while you slid your hand into his, feeling the roughness of his palm against the pads of your fingertips. 
A zing of thrill went straight to your core at his words, joining the sparks you felt when you touched him. The fingers of your other hand played with the hem of your dress as you stepped one foot out of the car. You darted a look around, finding you had some relative privacy between Ari’s Lexus and the next car over, and pretended to rearrange your skirt. 
In reality, you flashed your bare slit for your sugar daddy, biting your lip and ducking your head when you heard his sharp inhale. Ari made a low, tortured sound and squeezed your fingers, practically pulling you out of the car before pinning you against the side.
“Naughty girl,” Ari growled in your ear, pressing his big body against yours so you were trapped between his hard muscles and the warm metal of the Lexus at your back. “You’re going to get us in trouble if you keep flashing that pretty pussy at me, darling.” 
A breathless, disbelieving laugh gusted past your lips before you could stop it, even as your head went a little fuzzy from the familiar scent of Ari’s cologne filling your senses. It felt like the vetiver and leather on his skin was embedded in your mind as a reminder of all the pleasure he’d given you, and with his body pressed against yours, it took you a moment to respond.
“You’re the one who told me not to wear panties to our apple picking date, daddy,” you reminded him, gripping the soft cotton of Ari’s t-shirt beneath his denim shirt, your fingers brushing against the sides of his tapered waist. You pushed yourself up onto your tiptoes to whisper in his ear, brushing your body against his firm form enticingly while your lips grazed along his scruffy cheek. “Maybe you shouldn’t have done that if you didn’t want me to show you my achy, needy cunt.”
A low growl rumbled in Ari’s chest and he pressed you harder against the side of his car, his body impossibly warm and hard through the thin fabric of your dress. You could feel every firm line of him against your soft curves, including the thick bulge digging into your stomach. 
Then, as if that wasn’t bad enough, Ari’s hands skimmed down your sides and dove beneath the hem of your skirt, palming your ass and kneading your soft flesh with firm, possessive fingers.
“Darling, if you keep saying such filthy things, you’re gonna end up in the back of my car with my cock buried in your achy, needy cunt,” he purred, a threat in his tone that he punctuated by nipping at your ear, making you gasp and arch into him, pressing your tits against his solid chest. “You’re gonna get us banned from the orchard because you won’t be able to stop screaming while I pound your pussy—is that what you want?”
It was on the tip of your tongue to say yes. 
In the short time since you’d stepped out of the car, Ari had you feeling wet and aching and empty. Warmth flooded your body that had nothing to do with the sun shining brightly above your heads, and you wanted badly for Ari to free his cock from his slacks and slide it inside you.
But then the shrieking laughter of children punctured the bubble of lust surrounding you, and you remembered exactly where you were. Shaking your head, you dropped your gaze to the edge of Ari’s jaw while you sucked in a deep breath, focusing on the fresh air beyond the scent of your sugar daddy’s cologne. 
Ari’s big body eased back, giving you more room to breathe and you ignored the pang of disappointment at the loss of him. Instead, you let the crisp autumn breeze brushing against your cheeks and dancing between your thighs cool you down. 
After giving you a moment, Ari curled a finger beneath your chin and tipped your face up to look at him. His brows were lowered and his eyes looked at you questioningly.
“Do you still want to go apple picking?” he asked softly, planting his other hand on the hood of his car, as if he needed to force himself not to touch you so you could answer his question. The thought made you smile, and his eyes dropped to your lips, his thumb brushing quickly over the bottom one. 
“I do,” you said in a light, breathless voice, a smile teasing around the edges of your mouth. On a whim, you nipped at Ari’s thumb, giving him a smirk when his eyes darkened. “If you think you can keep it in your pants until later, daddy,” you taunted him, pushing your hips forward so his bulge pressed into your belly.
“You’re such fucking trouble,” Ari growled before his mouth captured yours in a searing kiss. One of his hands grabbed your waist, pulling you into him while the other cradled your head gently, holding you exactly where he wanted you while he devoured your mouth, his tongue sweeping possessively past your lips until you were moaning softly into him.
A loud, clearing throat had you finally breaking apart. Both you and Ari turned your heads toward the sound, finding a blonde woman raising an eyebrow at the two of you before cutting her eyes pointedly to the children beside her. Your cheeks heated and you buried your face in Ari’s neck to muffle a cackling laugh. 
“Apologies, ma’am,” Ari called gruffly, raising a hand in a repentant wave. 
The woman huffed and rolled her eyes, which only made you laugh harder, pressing your face deeper into the warm curve of Ari’s shoulder as you tried to stay quiet. When the woman and her family were finally gone, you leaned back, giving Ari a cheeky grin. 
“Think she’s gonna complain about us and get us banned?” you asked teasingly, sliding your hands up Ari’s chest until they rested on his shoulders, trying not to think about how easy it was to touch your sugar daddy so casually. “Tell them we were acting indecently in the parking lot?”
Ari laughed, chucking you under your chin gently before ducking down for a quick kiss. “If she does, I’ll just buy the farm,” Ari murmured against your mouth. “They can’t ban us if I own them.”
Your breath caught in your lungs at Ari’s pronouncement, surprise making your heart leap in your chest. Your sugar daddy had bought you plenty of expensive gifts since you’d started seeing him, but buying a farm so you could go apple picking in peace was on another level entirely. You had to wonder if Ari was serious, but the look in his eye was genuine when he pulled back. 
“Don’t give me that look, darling,” he rumbled, his heated gaze raking over your face, taking in your wide eyes and parted lips. His thumb stroked over your bottom lip, pulling on it ever so slightly to the side, sending a little thrill through your body. “Or we aren’t making it into the orchard.”
You closed your mouth, swallowing thickly and bobbed your head in a nod. Then, you slid away from Ari, slipping from between his big body and the car and taking a deep, steadying breath.
Even with the warm September sun shining down on your shoulders, you felt a little cold without Ari’s heat and shivered. But you told yourself you were being ridiculous, shaking off the shiver and turning back to your sugar daddy.
Ari was standing with both hands planted on the hood of the car, his head hanging between them while he took deep breaths. He must’ve felt your attention on him because he lifted his head and gave you a charming smile. 
“Just gimme a sec, darling,” he said, shooting you a wink before he straightened and dropped his hands to the bulge in his slacks. 
You tried not to ogle your sugar daddy as he adjusted himself to make his hard length less prominent in his pants, but you knew what was hiding beneath his clothes and you knew how good his cock felt sliding inside you.
A sizzling, delicious warmth cascaded through your body, and you let yourself watch Ari’s big hands adjusting his bulge for a moment before tearing your eyes away and taking deep breaths of the fresh air to clear your head as much as possible.
A moment later, Ari slung his arm around your shoulders and together the two of you walked toward the entrance to the orchard.
It took effort, but you managed not to look down at the front of his pants, sure that if you did, neither of you would make it any further. And you did want to go apple picking. You had so many things you wanted to bake with the apples you were going to pick. 
Keeping your chin up and your gaze forward, you and Ari walked to the small, squat red building that served as the entryway to the orchard. One side was for folks heading into the field of apple trees, and you joined the line while scrutinizing the size of baskets and crates you could get for picking. 
Ari let you choose the size, and you picked a decent size wooden basket, thinking that would give you plenty of apples to use for baking. A farm worker explained that your apples would be weighed when you were done, and you paid per pound. Then they handed Ari a map that specified where each apple variety could be found, and the two of you were set free into the orchard. 
“What kind of apples are we picking today?” Ari asked, peering at the paper in his hand while he snagged the basket from you. 
You leaned into his side so you could read the map, and pointed when you found what you wanted. “Honeycrisp, honeycrisp!” you chanted, letting your excitement overtake you. 
Ari chuckled, folding the map and tucking it into his pocket before giving you one of his charming grins. “Honeycrisp it is, honeycrisp,” he teased, smoothing his hand down your arm to lace his fingers with yours before he began walking into the orchard.
A shiver of delight raced down your spine at Ari’s gentle, familiar touch and the sweet new nickname. He’d only ever called you ‘darling’ before, and while you liked the pet name, ‘honeycrisp’ made you feel closer to your sugar daddy because it was meant for only you. It was something people in a real romantic relationship did, wasn’t it?
Your feet stumbled a little before you fell into step beside Ari. Out of the corner of your eye, you looked up at him consideringly, wondering—not for the first time—what he thought of you. If he thought you were someone worth caring about—if he thought of you at all when you weren’t together. 
Your sugar daddy flashed an easy smile at you, and you couldn’t help but return the gesture, even as you thought about how difficult he was to read. He was always charming and easygoing, and it made it hard to figure out what he was really thinking, let alone what he was really feeling.
You did your best to push those pondering thoughts from your mind and simply enjoy the walk through the orchard with Ari. You reminded yourself that he’d made it clear he just wanted to have fun with you, so that’s what you were determined to do: Enjoy the warm day and pick some apples with your handsome sugar daddy.
The honeycrisp section of the orchard ended up being quite busy, with families and groups of friends forming small crowds around all the trees closest to the entrance of the field. You paused for a moment, your face falling in a small frown.
Ari must’ve seen your expression because he tugged on your hand and led you past the crowds, strolling down a long row of apple trees to go deeper into the orchard. The excited chatter of other people faded until you could barely hear them and the farm grew peaceful. Finally, you came to the edge of the orchard, and Ari pulled you to a stop at the end of a row of honeycrisp trees. 
“Wow, that’s a lot of apples,” you said, peering up at the trees around you. They were bigger and taller than the ones you’d passed that were being picked over by the crowds. Their branches were practically bursting with ripe, red apples, the color swirling with yellow and green as it often did with that particular variety. 
It seemed no one else had thought to escape the crowds and venture deeper into the orchard, because you couldn’t hear anyone else around. It was just you, your sugar daddy and the apple trees. 
It was so perfect you couldn’t stifle the beaming grin that spread across your face.
“Should I go back for another basket—or a crate?” Ari asked, a grin in his tone. 
When you finally tore your eyes away from the trees and their bounty, you found him staring at you, something like fondness in his gaze. It struck you that Ari had no idea why you wanted apples—you’d never told him you liked to bake or what you planned to do with the ones you picked—but he’d planned the date and was offering to help you pick as many apples as you wanted. 
A warmth started in your chest, feeling as though it were wrapping around your heart and filling you up with a dizzying amount of sunshine, until your ribs were nearly bursting with it. Your cheeks felt warm, and your face ached a little from how wide you were smiling. 
When you realized that you were staring back at Ari with just as much, if not more, affection than was in his gaze, you tried to tamp it down, forcing yourself to scoff lightly at his question. 
“I think one will be plenty,” you said dryly, turning back to the trees and trying to calculate how many apples would fit into the basket Ari carried. Would it be enough for the apple crisp cheesecake recipe you’d been dying to try? You decided it would have to be. 
“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours, honeycrisp?” Ari asked softly, curling a finger beneath your chin and tipping your face to look up at him. He eased your bodies toward each other and your arms wrapped naturally around his waist. 
It wasn’t until you’d pressed your hands to Ari’s back, your hands settling against the solid muscle of him, that you even realized what you were doing. When you did, you froze, feeling a little spooked by how easy it was becoming to sink into Ari’s casual touches and return them. It felt like there was a growing intimacy between the two of you, and you didn’t know quite yet how you felt about it. 
“Honeycrisp?” you asked, latching on to the one thing you could think to say that would delay you needing to answer Ari’s question. 
He’d never asked you what you were thinking before. When he checked in with you, his questions were always more direct, and more specific about what you were doing. You didn’t know if he really wanted to know, so you hoped a distraction might work.
Ari’s grin turned a little mischievous, like he knew what you were doing, and he wrapped his arms around you, hauling you up against his large, firm body. He ducked his head and nudged your nose with his, tickling your cheek with his beard until you laughed softly into his scruff.
“It fits, doesn’t it?” he asked in a low, rumbly voice that sent warmth dancing through your body. “You’re sweet as honey and as delicious as an apple crisp.” He kissed your lower lip, sucking on its plumpness with a slow, deliberate drag that had you nearly moaning into his mouth.
“Yeah, I like it,” you murmured when he released your lip, your voice obscenely breathy as your eyes fluttered open. You couldn’t remember closing them. Being so close to Ari, having his arms around you and his lips on you, was rattling your brain a little.
“Now, darling honeycrisp, tell daddy what had you thinking so hard about those apples,” Ari rumbled, his voice sweetly coaxing as he brushed butterfly kisses along your jaw. His lips were soft and his beard was coarse, and the contrast of the sensations had you sighing softly and melting further into his arms. “Unless you don’t want to tell me?”
There was a thread of uncertainty in Ari’s tone as he voiced the question, like he wasn’t sure if he was pushing too hard by asking you to tell him what you’d been thinking about. 
It was so different to how other sugar daddies—other men in general—had treated you. They’d always demanded you tell them whatever they wanted to know, as if they had a right to every part of you. 
But Ari wasn’t like that. He’d never been like that, and it didn’t surprise you that the first time he asked something even remotely personal, he was still giving you the opportunity to sidestep the question if you didn’t want to answer. It made you want to tell him all the more.
“I was thinking about what I want to bake with the apples we pick,” you answered, a smile teasing around the edges of your mouth. “And trying to make sure one basket would be enough.”
Ari brushed a kiss to the apple of your cheek, as if thanking you for telling him. Pulling back a bit so he could look at you, he tilted his head to the side in curiosity.
“You like to bake?”
You felt a little shy in the moment, ducking your head under the weight of his sparkling blue eyes, and nodded. “Yeah,” you said shrugging as if it was no big deal. Then, when Ari didn’t reply right away, you went on, filling the silence by answering a question he hadn’t asked. “I don’t usually tell sugar daddies—the one time I did, he got weird.”
Biting your lip to stem the flow of words from your mouth, you winced. You weren’t sure if Ari had known you’d had other sugar daddies before him, but it felt awkward to acknowledge the fact even if you weren’t ashamed of it. Besides, something inside you rebelled against the idea of lumping Ari in with all your other sugar daddies—he truly wasn’t like anyone else you’d been with. 
“Weird how?” Ari asked in a tone gentler than any you’d heard him use before. One of his hands cupped the back of your neck, but he didn’t try to make you look at him, just stroked your skin with his thumb. The gesture was so profoundly comforting that you lay your head on his shoulder and gave a sigh of relief. 
“Once he knew I liked to bake, he expected me to bake for him,” you explained slowly, choosing your words carefully. “But not just bake—he bought me an apron and skimpy little dresses to wear underneath it with these ridiculous heels. He wanted me to bake for him and…service him.” 
You pressed your face into Ari’s shoulder, remembering the experience and cringing over what you’d let that man talk you into. He was a major reason you appreciated Ari’s boundaries so much. You felt safer, like things couldn’t spiral out of your control, with the boundaries your sugar daddy had set in place.
After you’d answered his question, Ari stayed quiet, just holding you, his thumb stroking soothingly over the back of your neck. His big arms felt so steady around you that you couldn’t help but take comfort in them, and you went on, feeling safe enough to tell Ari the rest.
“He took all the joy out of baking,” you said in a small voice. “I stopped seeing him soon after, but he wasn’t happy about it.”
Ari exhaled a sharp breath and he squeezed you in his arms, holding you tight for a long moment before he eased up a little. 
“Thank you for telling me,” he murmured, brushing a kiss to your forehead. “I would love to try your baking, but only if you want—hell, you can come over today and use my kitchen and bake in one of my shirts if you want.”
A relieved laugh gusted out of you, and you were so glad Ari understood that it took you a moment to realize he’d invited you to his apartment. 
You’d never seen where he lived—and even though he paid for it, he’d never been inside your apartment either. Ari had always gotten hotel rooms, even for dates in in the city. 
You hadn’t thought much about it beyond appreciating the fact that Ari didn’t act entitled to be in your space because he paid for it. But now he was inviting you to his apartment, his space, and you didn’t know what to make of it.
Pulling back, you gave him a curious look. 
“Are you sure?”
Ari leveled you with a look of his own, and though his gaze was serious, there was a hint of amusement in the curve of his mouth. “Are you sure?” he countered, his voice going low and rumbly as he went on. “If you start baking in my kitchen wearing only my shirt, there’s a very good chance I’ll eat more of you than whatever you make.” He raised his eyebrows, as if to drive home the lewd insinuation of his statement. 
But despite his dirty warning—or perhaps because of it—you only warmed to the idea of baking in Ari’s apartment. It sounded fun in a way it hadn’t been with your past sugar daddy and you bounced on the balls of your feet as excitement flooded through you. 
“Don’t threaten me with a good time, daddy,” you sassed, shifting your arms to wind around Ari’s neck. You used your hold on him to keep your balance as you pushed up onto your tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his scruffy cheek. “I already know what I want to make.”
Ari chuckled, giving you a quick kiss before pulling out his phone and telling you to pull up the recipe so that he could forward it to his assistant to make sure his apartment had everything you’d need. You did as he asked and handed his phone back to him, watching for his reaction to the recipe you’d chosen.
To your delight, Ari groaned like he was being tortured, his thumb flicking over the screen as he scrolled through the recipe to look at all the pictures.
“You’re gonna make this?” he asked, before reading out the title, “An Apple crisp cheesecake?” He made another agonized sound before looking to you for confirmation.
You couldn’t help but laugh at his reaction, knowing he was excited despite the miserable noises he was making, and nodded eagerly to answer his question.
Ari shook his head with a disbelieving look on his face and tapped out a message on his phone before pocketing it again. Then he grabbed you around the waist and hauled you against him again.
“You’re trouble for my pants, honeycrisp,” he muttered, dropping a too-brief kiss to your lips. “First you make me hard enough I feel like I’m gonna pop my zipper.” He trailed kisses along your jaw and down your neck in between his words, his mouth and beard tickling your skin while you melted into his arms. “Next you’re gonna fill me up with apple crisp cheesecake until my button breaks.” 
You made a sound that was half-laugh, half-moan as you tipped your head to the side, giving him more access to nip and lick at your neck while you clung to his shoulders, your knees going weak from your sugar daddy’s attention. 
“You don’t need to eat that much cheesecake, Ari,” you wheezed in between bouts of laughter, giggling harder when he nipped playfully at your ear.
“If it’s as delicious as you, I don’t know how I’ll be able to stop myself,” he flirted, kissing the spot just beneath your ear that had you shivering in his arms. 
“Ari,” you said his name on a breathy exhale, and it was a good thing his lips captured yours in a searing kiss, because you didn’t have any hope of responding to his compliment. Instead, you showed him how much you appreciated it by kissing him back hard, your fingers tangling in his soft brown hair as you clung to your sugar daddy and made out in the apple orchard.
By the time Ari pulled away to let you get some air, you were breathless and happier than you’d been in a long time. To your own surprise, you felt good about opening up to Ari and telling him about your past bad experience. He’d made you feel heard and cared for, all while giving you reason to believe he’d never do anything like that to you. He made you feel safe in a way you hadn’t with any of your other sugar daddies. 
Because of all that, you were actually excited to finally see his apartment. It felt like an important step, the beginning of something new, perhaps something deeper, and though there was an undercurrent of anxiety in your belly, you were more excited than anything else. 
And if you weren’t mistaken, Ari looked excited, too. His eyes were looking at you with affection in their depths, and his mouth was curved into a genuine smile. 
As he grinned down at you, Ari let his hands slide down from your lower back to your ass, groping you through your dress before swatting the soft cheeks lightly. 
“Alright, honeycrisp, these apples won’t pick themselves,” he teased good-naturedly. “And I’ve got a craving for some apple crisp cheesecake now.” He waggled his eyebrows at you, making you laugh.
But you forced a serious expression onto your face and gave him a mocking salute. “Yes, sir,” you said in a deeper voice, trying to tamp down on the smile that wanted to break free.
You lost the battle when Ari gave a loud laugh, his head tipping back and the sun shining down on his golden face while he gave into your silliness. He recovered quickly, though, looking back down at you fondly as he rumbled, “That’s ‘yes, daddy’, to you, honeycrisp.” Then he slapped your ass a little harder to urge you to get a move on before he finally, reluctantly, pulled away and turned in the direction of the apple trees.
To ease some of the disappointment you both felt, Ari gave you a salacious wink that had your cheeks warming again. You couldn’t even blame the September sun on the heat in your face. Your sugar daddy was just so hot, it was hardly even fair.
To distract yourself from wanting to curl up in Ari’s arms and say to hell with apple picking, you snatched up the basket he’d dropped, arching your back and popping your ass to give him a peek at your pussy, then straightened and skipped to the nearest apple tree to start picking. 
When you chanced a glance over your shoulder, you saw Ari’s eyes were heated and staring at the way your skirt fluttered around your ass, his big hand palming his bulge in his pants. You wiggled your ass for him, turning back around to hide your laughter when his long-suffering groan met your ears. 
But you couldn’t keep your eyes off Ari and you turned your head to watch him out of the corner of your eye, catching him swiping a hand down over his face while he shook his head. Something about the gesture sent your heart pitter-pattering in your chest—which only got worse when Ari caught you looking and winked while he adjusted himself in his pants.
You felt giddy as you refocused on the tree in front of you, your breaths coming in soft little gasps as excitement and desire swirled in your core. It took you a long moment to gather your thoughts and remind yourself that you could not jump your sugar daddy in the middle of an apple orchard that was open to the public—no matter how much you desperately wanted to. 
With slightly shaking fingers, you began to pick apples, doing your best to pay attention to what you were doing and make sure you were selecting the best fruit you could find. If Ari was going to try your baking for the first time, you wanted your apple crisp cheesecake to be the best that it could possibly be. 
Ari came to stand beside you, and though you wanted him to put his hands on you, you were happy to see him dedicate himself to the task of picking apples, even reaching up to the branches that were too high for you. In turn, you showed Ari how to check for bruises and other unwanted things in the fruit before adding them to the basket at your feet.
Between the two of you picking apples, it wasn’t long before the basket was nearly overflowing, but you were having so much fun, you didn’t want it to end. So when Ari asked if you still needed more, you gave him a shy smile and said just a few. You didn’t want him to go get another basket—because, really, you didn’t need that many apples—but you didn’t want the apple picking part of your date to end just yet.
Your sugar daddy seemed to understand your desire to linger because he didn’t call you out on the fact that your basket could barely hold any more apples. Instead, he flashed you an indulgent grin and nodded, joining you under the apple tree where you’d been picking. 
But rather than moving beside you, as he’d stood while you’d worked together, he came up behind you so that his chest was brushing against your back. His hands settled lightly on your waist, loosely caging you in beneath the apple tree with your body facing the trunk. 
He ducked down so his scruffy, bearded cheek was pressed to yours and pointed to a cluster of apples just out of your reach. “Why don’t you grab one of those?” he suggested, the practiced innocence in his tone nearly making you snort with laughter. 
You knew Ari was playing a game, you could feel it in the mischievous tension crackling in the air, and you were almost certain it would lead to some sort of naughtiness in the orchard. But your body was wound tight, and you wanted to get up to a little mischief with your sugar daddy, so you decided to play along. 
“I can’t reach, daddy,” you simpered, proving your point by reaching your hand up to show that the apples were too high up, your fingertips only barely grazing the fruit. You used the movement to deliberately push your ass back into Ari’s lap and you had to smother a giggle when you felt the hard ridge of him in his pants.
“Let me help, honeycrisp,” Ari rumbled, and though you couldn’t see his grin, you knew it was there by the warmth in his voice. You bit your lip against your own wide smile.
Ari’s hand slid down your side, all the way to the back of your thigh, before he gently grabbed your leg behind your knee to lift it until your foot was planted on a low branch. Then he guided your hips deeper into his lap, where you could feel the long, stiff length of his cock wedging between your ass cheeks through your thin dress.
“C’mon, honeycrisp, reach a little bit more,” he urged, tilting your hips and bending his knees so that his hard bulge was pressed against your bare slit. Then he surged forward, lifting you just a little off the ground while he dragged the thick length of his cock against your weeping pussy. 
You fell helplessly against the trunk of the tree, the apples forgotten as a low moan slipped past your lips. Ari teased you with his clothed cock, and your spine arched to bare more of yourself to his hard bulge. Craning your neck to catch Ari’s eye over your shoulder, you gave him a desperate, pleading look. 
“Daddy, please,” you begged on a whine, pushing back into his lap and wiggling your ass side to side to try to entice him into giving you something more. You’d been teasing each other all day, and you were hitting a breaking point. You needed him to give you something.
Ari chuckled, burying his face in the side of your neck, his deep laughter rolling deliciously down your spine and settling between your thighs, until you were pulsing with desire. He curled around your body until he was surrounding you, your smaller form fitting perfectly within the cage of his arms. 
He reached above you and easily plucked the apple he’d directed you to pick from the spot you hadn’t been able to reach and presented it to you. At the same time, his other hand began to wander, groping your soft tits until you moaned prettily again for him. 
“Does it pass your inspection, darling?” he asked, urging you to focus on the apple he held in front of you. 
Truthfully, you didn’t care anymore about picking apples—you had plenty of them in the basket at your feet—but you did your best to look it over. You turned it over in your trembling fingers, checking for bruises and bugs. Finding it to be perfect, you nodded. 
“Yes, daddy.”
“Good girl,” Ari murmured, taking the apple from your hands and pulling away to set it on top of the pile in your basket. 
You had to bite back a whine at the loss of him, but he was back against you a moment later, his warmth surrounding you as his arms curled around your body. His hands slid up your sides and cupped your tits, kneading them in his big, strong hands until your head fell back against his shoulder and you let out a soft whimper of need.
“Now is that enough apples, honeycrisp?” he asked, a hint of teasing in his tone.
“Yuh huh,” you mumbled, nodding weakly as you arched your spine and pushed your chest into Ari’s hands. He rewarded you by pinching and plucking your nipples through the soft cotton of your dress, wringing a weak whine from your lips. “Plenty.” 
“Good,” Ari rumbled, pressing his face into the side of your neck, his mouth licking and nipping at your skin like you tasted as sweet as the fruit you’d been picking, his rough beard making you shiver in his hold. “Because if I had to see your pretty pussy winking at me from beneath your skirt one more time while you were bending over or reaching for some apples, it was going to drive me fucking wild.”
A low moan slipped free from your lips while one of Ari’s hands skimmed down your front, sliding under the hem  of your dress and cupping you between your thighs. His big hand covered your entire mound, which was sticky with your juices. 
He growled when he felt just how wet you were, the sound reverberating down your spine and making your pussy spasm, more wetness dripping from your slit and into his palm.
“Fuck,” Ari ground out through gritted teeth, his voice rough with his own barely leashed desire. “You’re soaking wet for me, honeycrisp—I gotta feel you,” he said, an urgency in his voice as he sank two fingers into your drenched hole, pulling another moan from you. His hips were grinding his bulge against your ass so hard, you could feel him throbbing. “Gotta feel this tight warm cunt on my cock, ‘m not gonna make it back to the car—need you now.”
“Ari,” you whispered harshly, trying to sound angry, but the two syllables of his name came out dipped in desire and you felt your sugar daddy shudder against your back, his fingers working harder inside your sopping cunt, his palm making soft slapping sounds every time he bottomed out. “We shouldn’t.” 
Despite your weak protest, you rolled your head to the side on Ari’s shoulder, peering through the branches of the tree toward where you’d left the crowds of other apple pickers. They were still so distant you couldn’t hear them over your soft, gasping breaths, but there was no telling when someone might stray from the others. They could stumble upon you at any moment. 
The only protection you had from wandering eyes were the branches of the apple tree. Thankfully, they were close enough and the leaves dense enough that you couldn’t see much beyond Ari’s big body, but if someone came close enough, they’d no doubt hear you or Ari, and then you’d be caught.
“We’re going to get arrested,” you scolded in a hushed tone before turning your head to bury your face in Ari’s beard and stifle the moan on the tip of your tongue. He hadn’t stopped fucking you with his fingers and your reluctance was ebbing from your body just as surely as your desire was leaking into his hand. 
Instead of responding to your statement with the seriousness you felt it deserved, Ari simply chuckled against your cheek and used his thumb to circle your clit, making your hips jerk into his hand, your body wordlessly begging him for more while you muffled a whine into the underside of his jaw. 
“We’ll be fine, honeycrisp,” Ari soothed in a placating tone that made you growl like a feral kitten into his throat, so he switched tactics, his voice going low and rough. “Don’t you wanna feel me, honey?” He asked, grinding his hard length into your soft ass until you mewled pathetically. “Don’t you wanna drip your sweet juices all over daddy’s cock like a good girl?” 
It was on the tip of your tongue to give in. You knew you shouldn’t. You knew there was a very real possibility that you could get caught, and it was only your fear of the potential consequences that held your words at bay. But Ari was well acquainted with the fear that held you back, and he knew exactly how to help you break through it. 
“Just the tip,” he murmured, his voice so warm you could hear the smile in it. “Just take the tip, and stay quiet, and we’ll be golden.” He nuzzled your face, his beard rasping over your soft skin and sending tingles of delight all through your body. 
You knew it was a ploy. You knew that Ari knew that you’d never be able to settle for just the tip of his cock—after all, you never had before. But it was easier to pretend you could settle for just the tip than to say yes to Ari fucking you in the middle of the apple orchard when there were people not too far away. It was the small step you needed to break free from your fear.
Lifting your head, you looked around. There was nothing to see except dense branches and leaves and endless apples. Ari’s body hid you entirely from sight, and you still couldn’t hear anyone else close by, so if you stayed quiet, you really could get away with a quickie in the orchard. 
A wicked smile spread across your face and you turned your head to catch Ari’s eye over your shoulder.
“Just the tip?” you asked, you voice laced with suggestion. You knew Ari was going to end up sinking much more of his cock into you, but you wanted to play along for a little bit. “Promise, daddy?” Your question was meant to sound innocent, but you couldn’t help the way the corners of your lips wavered in an eager grin.
Ari chuckled and kissed the corner of your mouth, because he knew exactly what you were doing. “I promise, darling…” he said, trailing off as he pulled his fingers from your pussy with an embarrassingly wet sound that made him grin. “Unless, of course, you beg me like a good girl.” 
“Hurry, daddy,” you cooed, wiggling your ass against Ari’s bulge, a teasing smile on your lips as you watched him over your shoulder. 
Ari’s eyes darkened and then he was using his clean hand to fumble with his belt and fly while he swatted your pussy playfully with his drenched fingers. You gasped and twitched, trying to stay quiet and failing miserably as desperate keening sound slipped from your mouth.
At your urging, Ari wasted no time, shoving his pants open and pulling out his cock, pushing your dress up over your ass and rubbing the tip through your drenched folds. Both of you groaned, Ari’s face falling forward against your shoulder while you grabbed onto the trunk of the tree in front of you, trying to stay upright while your knees trembled. 
Then Ari was pushing inside, the head of his cock sinking into the warmth of your pussy. The stretch of him was too delicious, and you moaned louder than was wise, but you couldn’t help yourself. He felt too good. 
“What’d I say about staying quiet?” Ari rumbled in your ear, right before he shoved his fingers in your mouth. The tart taste of your wetness mixed with apples burst on your tongue and you moaned again, licking wildly at his fingers to get as much of it as you could. “Mm, that’s it, clean up your mess, honeycrisp—show daddy what a good girl you can be.”
Ari’s other hand gripped your hip, holding you steady while he fucked you with just the tip of his cock, pushing into your tight hole and pulling free until the tease of it drove you wild. 
“Mm-oah, mm-oah,” you begged around Ari’s fingers, trying to push back on Ari’s stiff length and take more of him, but he held you still, forcing you to take only what he gave you. You bounced impatiently, the foot that was still lifted on one of the branches shaking it so furiously, the leaves rattled and a few apples dropped to the ground.
“Oh, did you want something, honey?” Ari asked, his tone filled with mocking innocence as he pulled his fingers from your mouth. You shot him a half-hearted glare over your shoulder, pouting. 
“I need more, daddy, please,” you begged, giving him your best desperate, pleading look while you pushed back against his hold, reveling in the way he didn’t let you move to take him further. “Please split me open with your thick cock, daddy—I need it.”
Ari blew out a sharp breath. “Fuck, I wanna tease you some more, but I can’t—need you too bad, honey,” Ari rasped, squeezing your hip while his other arm wrapped loosely around the front of your throat, so the bulge of his bicep was just beneath your chin. 
“Remember, stay quiet.” His hushed words were your only warning before Ari slammed into you, shoving every inch of his hard cock into your wet, needy cunt. 
A scream welled up inside your chest, your mouth dropping open as it clawed its way up your throat, but at the last second before it was set free, you managed to bury your face in Ari’s bicep. Your teeth sank into his warm, golden skin and you bit your sugar daddy while you screamed into his arm. 
His tortured groan was loud, but only because it poured directly into your ear, the sound dripping in pleasure as your inner walls squeezed his hard cock and made room for the thick length of him in the depths of your body.
Bliss consumed you, the stinging edge of Ari pushing inside you so fast and stretching you so suddenly making your body burn all the hotter. Already, your cunt was pulsing around Ari’s cock like you wanted him to stay buried inside you for a long time and you sighed happily, pulling your teeth from your sugar daddy’s arm. 
While Ari gave you a moment to adjust, his hand kneading the plush softness of your hip, you kissed and licked at the indents your teeth had left in his skin. He chuckled, brushing a kiss against your temple, an acceptance of your wordless apology. 
“Ready, honey?” Ari asked softly, nuzzling your cheek while he rolled his hips, grinding his cock into you in a way that had you moaning again. “This is gonna be hard and fast. I can’t—I gotta pound your pretty pussy,” he rumbled, his tone almost apologetic with the urgency in it. “Gotta feel you dripping around me, squeezing me, milking me.”
His hand shifted from your hip to slip between your thighs, his fingers finding your slippery clit and rubbing the puffy pearl. He grunted when you clenched around him, his fingers stroking you harder and winding your pleasure higher while he rolled his hips, fucking you in short, sharp thrusts.
“Fuck, honey, fuck,” he bit out, his breaths heavy in between every word. “Tell me you’re ready for me to move.”
“Please, yes, move,” you cried propping your chin on Ari’s bicep while your nails dug into the trunk of the tree in front of you. You used your grip to brace yourself and push back on Ari’s cock, taking him deeper with every thrust. “Need you, daddy, please, please, please,” you babbled, your voice coming out strained with the effort to keep it quiet.
“Fucking right you need me—just like I need you,” Ari growled, pulling his hips back and slamming forward, driving into you with so much force, you could hear the soft sound of your ass slapping against his thighs. “You have the sweetest, tightest pussy I’ve ever had—best fucking pussy in the world. I dream about it when I’m not with you,” he confessed, his words rough like he’d pulled them from the depths of his soul. “Dream about pumping you full of my come until your belly’s bulging with me, honey.”
Your mind reeled at Ari’s confession even as your body sank deeper into his hold. You were still trying to catch up on processing his words but your pussy was clenching around his cock greedily, as if begging for him to come inside you already. 
In that moment, a singular truth crystalized in your mind: You’d been deluding yourself into thinking you didn’t care for Ari—that he didn’t care for you. It was very clear that Ari did care about you, and you cared about him.
All those boundaries in your relationship, you realized you’d been the one creating them, not Ari. Ari had been patient, chipping away at the walls you’d built around yourself until he’d somehow found his way in. He’d dreamed about you, and you’d thought he was just another sugar daddy looking to have some fun. You’d been so wrong about him.
At the weight of your realization, you nearly collapsed against the tree, but managed to hold yourself up, sobbing with pleasure and emotion. Ari seemed to sense the shift in your mood and he slowed his movements, as if he was going to stop, but you shook your head, feeling feral with your need for him. 
“Please, daddy,” you cried softly, your voice hoarse with the flood of affection filling your heart. It was emphasized by the feeling of Ari inside you, surrounding you, your body cradled in his arms while he fuckd you like he wanted you to never forget the feel of him. “Fill me up, make me your perfect little cumslut, daddy, just keep me—keep me.” 
“Always,” he rasped, his lips at your temple. The promise in that single word buried deep in your heart, taking root. 
Something changed between you and Ari, and you knew he felt it too because he started fucking you faster than before, his hips snapping harder against your ass so he could push deep into your cunt with every thrust.
“Fuck, honey, ‘m almost there, are you close?” he rasped, his tone desperate. 
Your head bobbed in a nod. 
“Uh huh, ‘m close, just need a little more…” you trailed off in a whine, trying to push back on his cock and grind your clit against his stroking fingers at the same time.
Thankfully, Ari understood what you were begging for, and he rubbed you harder, his fingers relentless in his pursuit of your pleasure while he rutted into your cunt.
“C’mon, honey, come on daddy’s cock,” he rumbled in your ear, his voice deliciously deep to match his dirty words and push you closer to the edge. “Be a good little cumslut and milk my cock, make me fill your sweet pussy with all my come, honey.” 
You buried your face into Ari’s bicep again, your teeth sinking into his skin as you screamed your release. Wave after wave of pleasure pulsed through your body, until your limbs were trembling and your fingers were shaking against the outside of Ari’s arm, having forgotten when you’d let go of the tree to cling to him.
With a grunt, Ari’s cock twitched inside you, reacting to the sting of your bite and the merciless grasping of your inner walls around his hard length. His hips stuttered, then he started fucking into you wildly, his thrusts falling out of rhythm while he chased his own release. 
“Good girl, honey, so good, feel so fucking good milking daddy’s cock,” he muttered, cutting off on a deep groan while his cock throbbed inside you.
Ari spilled himself deep in your cunt and you moaned weakly, pulling back from his arm and licking his golden skin to sooth the indents your teeth had left behind. He tasted like salty skin and sweet apples and you hummed in pleasure as you rode out the remainder of your release with your bodies writhing together.
After a few long moments basking in the glorious afterglow of coming together, Ari took a deep breath and shifted his arm, chuckling lowly when you whimpered at the loss of his bicep to lick and kiss. He made it up to you by turning your head and capturing your lips in a sweet kiss, pouring all the affection you finally knew he felt for you into the way his mouth moved against yours. 
When he pulled away, leaving you slightly breathless, Ari leveled you with a serious look. 
“You know you’re special to me, don’t you, honey?” he asked, using the new pet name that you knew was shortened from ‘honeycrisp’. 
You’d been too wrapped up in your own head to notice the way it rolled off his tongue—it was an endearment for someone Ari cared about, someone who was special to him, as he said.
Biting your kiss-swollen lower lip, feeling a little abashed that it had taken you so long to realize what Ari felt for you, you nodded. You could feel your cheeks warming, and tried to duck your head, but Ari only chuckled and caught your lips in another kiss, though it was briefer.
When he’d kissed away your anxiety, Ari set about extricating himself from you, pulling free from your body and helping you down from the tree. He quickly stuffed his softening cock back into his pants and then helped smooth your dress back over your hips before doing up his slacks. You turned to him, brushing his hair back from his face and warming at the way he was smiling down at you. 
Ari had an infectious grin on his face, and you couldn’t help but return it, your heart feeling warm and cozy in your chest. 
The two of you smiled goofily as you helped right each other’s appearances. Once you’d fixed yourselves as much as possible, Ari stooped down to pick up the basket of apples you’d picked, then grabbed your hand, lacing your fingers together and planting a kiss on the back of your palm before heading off back to the farm stand.
As you walked past all the crowds of people, you were certain everyone knew what you and Ari had gotten up to in the orchard, but no one stopped or stared or said anything. They were all too focused on their own friends and families and the task of apple picking to notice you and Ari, or your big, silly smiles.
At the farm stand, Ari paid for the apples, then loaded them into his Lexus before helping you into the passenger seat. He dropped a kiss to your forehead, then rounded the front of the car and slid into his own seat.
You were quiet on the drive back to the city, your mind ruminating over the beginning of your relationship with Ari. When you thought back to your first few dates, you realized you’d been the one who was hesitant to answer any personal questions from your sugar daddy—and you’d never asked any of him. You’d also been the one to balk at the idea of either going back to his place or your apartment, leading him to get hotel rooms. 
Ari had been the one to respect your boundaries, even as he’d tried to get to know you better. He’d tried to ask you questions you felt comfortable answering—it was how he’d found out you liked apple picking, because you’d chosen it as a fall-themed date. He’d been so careful with you, it made your heart hurt a little that you’d kept him at arm’s length for so long.
Turning from the scenery of the foliage fading into the cityscape of New York, you ran your eyes over Ari’s profile. His expression was easy, relaxed and open, the hint of a smile on his face. You’d thought he just always looked like that, but you realized it was because he was with you. 
Reaching across the center console, you scooped up Ari’s hand and laced your fingers through his before settling your joined hands on your thigh. He glanced at you, shooting you a quick smile and squeezing your fingers, before turning back to the road.
By the time the car pulled into the underground parking garage of the high-rise on the Upper West Side where Ari lived, you were resolved to try to let your guard down a little more around him. Ari had shown you he could be trusted with your heart just as much as your body, and you were determined to show him you trusted him with all of you. 
Still, it was a little intimidating walking into his apartment for the first time, the anxiety that he was only bringing you there because he wanted something from you—something you didn’t want to give—was a knot in your stomach. But then you looked at Ari and you realized he’d never do that to you. He was bringing you to his home because he wanted to, not because he wanted something from you. 
Ari’s penthouse was warm and cozy, decorated in dark brown wood and warm golden tones, with hints of blue that reminded you of the ocean. You realized you knew Ari was a fan of the beach, because so many of the trips he’d taken you on had been close to the water. Walking into his home felt like walking into a reflection of his heart, and you didn’t take that for granted.
After setting down the apples on a table next to the door and stepping out of your shoes, Ari took you on a tour of his apartment, both the upstairs and the downstairs (because it was big enough to have two floors!). He showed you every room, including his bedroom and his study, tugging you into each by your joined hands when you seemed hesitant to enter his spaces.
Ari left the kitchen for last, but the two of you lingered in the living room, standing in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows that overlooked Central Park. Ari wrapped his arms around you from behind, swaying you lightly from side to side, almost like you were dancing. 
“You have a beautiful home, Ari,” you said, looking out over the city and appreciating the way the buildings and treetops were cast in the warm, yellow glow of afternoon sunshine. An errant thought crossed your mind, that you could get used to the view from Ari’s apartment. It was stunning.
“Thank you, honey,” Ari murmured, dropping a kiss to the base of your throat while his arms squeezed you tighter. He buried his face in your neck, so his words were a little muffled when he said, “I always hoped you’d like it enough to want to come over again and… again.”
You could hear in the pause of his words where he’d stopped himself from saying something different, and you wondered over it. But you knew yourself well enough not to ask. If just walking into his apartment felt like a big step, you knew asking him what he’d meant to say might spook you a bit too much, and you didn’t want that. So you just hummed in response.
Ari chuckled, like he somehow knew it was taking effort for you to be in his apartment, and he thought it was cute how difficult it was for you. His mouth trailed up your neck, effectively distracting you from your thoughts, before nipping at the edge of your jaw. 
“Want to see the kitchen now?” 
Nodding so eagerly, you nearly head-butted him, you turned in his hold and looked up at him with expectant eyes. Ari gave you an affectionate smile, then grabbed your hand and led the way to the kitchen.
He’d saved it for last, and when you stepped inside, you understood why. A gasp slipped from your lips as you took in the beautiful space. The color scheme of the apartment carried over to the kitchen, with dark brown cabinets and lighter wood countertops. There was a pop of blue in the backsplash, and all kinds of expensive gadgetry. 
You were so busy taking everything in, it took you a moment to spot the brand-new stand mixer sitting on the counter in a color that matched the rest of the room. Beside it were some of the ingredients you’d need for the apple crisp cheesecake you’d told Ari you wanted to make and you realized his assistant must’ve already come and gone. 
Walking over and running your fingers over the sleek mixer, tears welled up in your eyes. It took effort to blink them away, and you shook your head slightly at yourself. It seemed silly to be crying over a stand mixer, but it felt bigger than that, like it was a sign of Ari making room in his life for you. He wanted you there, he wanted to keep you, like you’d begged him to. 
“Everything ok, honey?” Ari asked, coming to stand behind you, but not touching you, giving you some space while you processed everything you’d realized that day.
“Yeah,” you said, your voice thick, no doubt giving away the emotion you were feeling. Before you could overthink it, you spun around and threw your arms around Ari’s shoulders, launching yourself at him for a tight hug. “You bought a mixer,” you stated, as if that was explanation enough. 
A soft laugh rumbled in Ari’s chest and he swept a hand down your spine, comforting you while a few tears leaked down your cheeks and into the collar of his denim shirt.
“Well, yeah,” he responded good-naturedly, a smile in his voice. “I did say I wanted you to want to come back, didn’t I?” 
“Uh huh,” you mumbled, laughing a little at his comment. Then you murmured, in a small voice, “Thank you.”
“Anytime,” Ari said, sounding genuine. 
For a long moment, you hugged him, and then you pulled away, swiping at your cheeks to clear away any tears or makeup. 
“Is the offer still open to bake while wearing only your shirt?” you asked, tipping your head back to smile shyly at Ari while your fingers played with the collar of his button-up.  
A grin spread across his face while shrugged out of the denim shirt. Then, to your surprise, he yanked his t-shirt off over his head, asking you which one you wanted. 
You took the denim one with fumbling fingers, your eyes raking over his bare chest while warmth bloomed deep in your core. It wasn’t the first time you’d seen Ari shirtless, of course, but you never got tired of looking at the expanse of his golden skin, dusted with dark brown hair that you wanted to rake your nails through. 
Ari let you look for a moment, using your distraction to help you slip out of your dress. Then he eased your arms into the denim shirt and buttoned it up, his big hands pausing briefly to grope your soft body every few moments. 
There was a glimmer of deep satisfaction in his blue eyes when he stepped back to look at you in his shirt. 
“Mm, you look so pretty, honey,” he rasped, taking one last look before crowding you into the counter at your back. His gaze darkened as he stared down at you, his grin turning wolfish when he rumbled, “I think I need a snack before you start baking.”
That was your only warning. You shrieked with surprised laughter when Ari hauled you back into the living room and tossed you down on one of his leather couches. Your giggles cut off abruptly in a moan when Ari descended on you, burying his face between your thighs and feasting on you like he was starving.
Your fingers twisted in Ari’s brown hair while he ate your pussy, encouraging you to scream your pleasure in the comfort of his home while he made you come against his mouth. You shattered apart with a loud cry while he fucked you with his tongue, his mouth greedily devouring your release, and the come he’d buried inside you earlier, like he hadn’t eaten in days. 
When he finally pulled away, Ari’s beard was soaked in your juices and he grinned up your body while you lay limply on the couch, your chest heaving as you caught your breath. Chuckling at the sight of you sprawled out on his couch, Ari pressed wet kisses to the inside of your thighs, licking the traces of your release from your skin.
“Fuck, honey, I can’t get enough of you,” he rumbled, his big hands kneading your plush thighs and hips, proving his point since it seemed like he couldn’t stop touching you. The blatant need and desire in his voice sent a shiver racing down your spine.
“If you keep going, I won’t have the strength to bake,” you warned him in a breathless voice, managing to lift your head enough to give him a stern look. 
Ari laughed into your thigh, pressing one last kiss to your skin before he raised up and gave you a wink. “Can’t have that,” he quipped, grabbing your hands and helping you up off the couch. You stumbled a little, your legs weak from your orgasm, but Ari caught you easily, wrapping his arm around your waist while he led you into the kitchen. 
Once you were propped up against the counter near the stand mixer, Ari left to retrieve the apples from the entryway. When he returned, you noticed he carried a pair of slippers that matched the ones he’d put on. Without saying a word, he set them on the floor next to your bare feet and carried on to start washing the fruit in the sink. 
You stepped into the slippers, your heart warming when you realized they were a perfect fit. For a long moment, you stared at Ari’s bare shoulders and broad back, wondering how you’d ever kept such a thoughtful man at arm’s length. Well, you decided, once again, you wouldn’t be doing that anymore. 
Turning back to the stand mixer and the ingredients, you organized everything on the counter, going to the fridge to pull out everything else you’d need. 
To your surprise, you and Ari worked well together in the kitchen. Once he was done cleaning all the apples you’d picked, he asked what he could do next, and you put him to work peeling and coring the fruit while you worked on the other elements of the cheesecake. 
When it came time to bake, Ari took the pan from your hands and popped it into the oven while you set a timer. Tension crackled between the two of you after the oven had snapped closed, and you came together in a flurry of limbs. Ari guided you back into the living room while he kissed you, his hands making quick work of removing all your remaining clothes.
You rode Ari to another orgasm while the sweet treat baked, the golden glow of the New York City sunset keeping the apartment awash in warm hues that made you feel cozy—like you were home. 
Once you were both sated, you collapsed on top of Ari’s chest, burying your face in his neck and nuzzling into his beard. You inhaled the familiar scent of his cologne, vetiver and leather, with a little bit of cinnamon from baking, and melted against him. You wanted to breathe in nothing but that scent for the rest of your life—and you refused to let that thought scare you.
Ari pulled a flannel blanket off of the back of his couch and wrapped it around you both, your pussy keeping his cock warm while you cuddled together until the timer went off. 
You couldn’t help but laugh as you watched Ari take the baking pan out of the oven wearing only an oven mitt on his hand. You, meanwhile, stood off to the side with the flannel blanket wrapped around your shoulders. He’d told you the blanket was highly flammable and insisted you stay clear of the oven with a stern look that made your insides go all gooey.
The two of you made out in the kitchen and made dinner while the cheesecake cooled. All the while, you kept thinking how easy it was to be with Ari, how you could see what your life would be like together. And you liked how it looked. You liked kissing him whenever you wanted and asking him about what movies he liked and what was the last book he read.
After dinner, you ate a slice of cheesecake together, and you couldn’t keep your eyes off of Ari’s face, enjoying every little groan and expression of pleasure he made. It was erotic enough that you left the last bite for him, getting to your feet to walk around the table and straddle his lap. 
He fucked you to another, blisteringly hot orgasm, and laughed only a little when you fell against his chest with an exhausted, but satisfied, sigh. 
In a soft voice, Ari asked if you’d stay the night, and the hope in his tone made your heart warm enough that you ignored the brief flicker of anxiety the question prompted. You shushed the worry inside you and said yes. 
Together, you cleaned up the kitchen and then Ari led you upstairs to the bedroom, pausing every few minutes to kiss you, like he wanted to remind himself you were still there. 
He gave you some of his clothes to wear to bed and showed you where everything was in his bathroom. You couldn’t help but notice that he had all of your favorite products, and a spare toothbrush for you. You smiled as you got ready for bed and slipped under the covers with him.
“Did you have a good day, honey?” Ari asked, pulling you into his body and wrapping you up in his arms. You were wearing one of his t-shirts—a clean one—while he had on a pair of boxer briefs. You hummed happily when your legs tangled together, enjoying the feel of his warm skin and tickling hair against you. 
“Mm, I had the best day, Ari,” you murmured sleepily, the comfort and warmth of his bed making it easy to let your exhaustion creep in. “Kiss,” you said, turning your head and repeating the greeting Ari had given you when he’d picked you up.
Your sugar daddy chuckled, the sound rumbling down your spine and making your heart flutter with delight. Your eyes were already closed, but you could feel his smile when he pressed a sweet, lingering kiss to your lips. 
“Don’t worry, honey, I’ll still be here in the morning,” he promised, his words assuaging a fear you hadn’t realized you’d felt, and you sighed in contentment.
Everything had changed between you and Ari, and you couldn’t help but think it was for the better. You were still a little anxious about opening yourself up to someone, especially a sugar daddy, but Ari had shown you that you could trust him—really trust him, with all your heart—and you were determined to do just that.
“G’night, Ari,” you whispered into the pillow that smelled like him, a hint of a smile in the curve of your mouth as sleep claimed you. 
“Good night, honey,” Ari crooned in your ear, his voice gentle and soft and oh so affectionate. “My sweet, sweet honeycrisp.”
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l6ndry · 8 hours ago
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summer sun forever, rafe cameron
band au!rafe x fan!reader (SMAU)
IN WHICH . . . one of the biggest warnings among celebrities is to avoid falling for a fan. rafe clearly does not consider this when he first notices his self proclaimed number one fan, you.
navigation: part 02 | part 03 | part 04
viewed best on mobile + dark mode.
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rafe's phone
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yn's phone
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amora speaks: can u tell i have no idea what im doing 🙂 (how do i act like a man) (help!) i am sooo sorry this took so long making these text messages literally take years off my life
also this post is wayyyyyy too long what was i thinking omfg
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READ ME: follow @l6ndry-fics if you want to be notified for all my future work, but if you want to be tagged specifically for this fic, please lmk and i'll add u to the taglist! (in order to stay on the taglist, you have to interact with these posts.)
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taglist ७౿ @nepttunesoop @lilithblackkk @kolsmikaelson @sabrina-carpenter-stan-account @rafescvmdumpster @wearemadeofstardust0 @livie4lifestarkeyblyth @maybankslover @rafestify @dayyzlol @namelesslosers @mjsvinyl @nellyboosworld @osamanyc @bradleyroosterbradshawfr @urmotherlvr @rafeslittlevixen @p0gue420 @hoelesslyt @aariahnaa @kay133sposts @hadids-world @vivian-555 @unclecrunkle @eitaababe @he6rtshaker @hiiiiiiii-111111 @fmit37cass @aoiiana @rrosiitas @shirley2626 @hereforchifuyu @rafesfavouritegirl @benwadsworthsgf @glxsyymads @starkeydolly
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hel1nn · 2 days ago
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apologies ၄၃
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𐔌 . ⋮ satoru gojo x fem reader .ᐟ ֹ ₊ ꒱
🎀𓂃 ࣪˖ : angst to fluff | arguments | cursed words |
୨୧ : your boyfriend didn't replied to your texts and calls after leaving for a long mission.
Smau + written part below ꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹
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Satoru sighs in frustration. He hadn't replied to your texts and calls because he was way too busy with work and.. forgot about you. So when he saw your texts he knew he fucked up. He continued his day, trying act everything was normal. Teaching his students then going on other missions blag blah. As always he came home late. Instead of using keys he teleported to your sharing apartment. There he saw you talking with someone on the phone, maybe shoko? Utahime. (Yes)
"i don't think he'll come home tonight" you sighed while talking on the phone, you were wearing on of his shirt, eyes puffy wnd tears stained cheeks, you didn't noticed satoru
"if you're not his top priority just leave him already"
"you don't understand,utahime. He didn't meant it like that but.."
"but what?"
"the way he told me i am not his top priority and if i don't understand i should just leave him,i don't know what to say but i got hurted so bad.."
With that you walked off to bedroom. You didn't noticed him standing Infront of your main door. The dinner left cold on the table. He felt guilty but didn't said anything. He got day off for few days. He sighed. He knew you wouldn't talk to him until all the anger you have disappeares.
-
He puts your portion of the food in the fridge after finishing his dinner. And then lays down on the couch , too scared to enter your room for now since he heard you sobbing there..he felt way more guilty than before but..he wasn't confident enough to approach you now. He sighed, thinking of ways you could forgive him. all the thinking took the best of him and then finally he fell asleep
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You woke up a little later than usual,when you came out of your room and you saw satoru sleeping on the couch. You frowned seeing him like that. All you could do was covering him up with a blanket in the cold room. You called yaga asking if satoru got a day off or not,so when you heard he got few days for himself you sighed in relief. Leaving a simple breakfast with a too sweet coffee for satoru before you left for your work. Teaching the students as always, sparring and doing the usual things . But you were still sad about how satoru behaved with you yesterday. You weren't able to see him and now you ended up making things even messier. You don't know how you will greet him when you get home. After the long day when you finally arrived your shared apartment,you hear some noices coming from kitchen,when you go to check whats going on there you see satoru cooking something,hes face slightly covered in flour. A cake in the oven. Him trying to make steak for you on the other side. His six eyes immediately noticed you, looking at you with a nervous smile.
"sweets..your too early.." he mumbles, trying to find any kind of anger on your face. You sigh,trying not smile at him
"what are you doing.." you said as you make your way to satoru standing beside him with a soft frown on your face
Satoru sighed, finally giving you his full attention.
"i just wanted to apologise..for yesterday by...making you a dinner.." he pouted slightly, looking down. Looking like a puppy caught stealing food. He thought you'd say something like 'fuck off' but instead he hears a soft giggle, when he looks up fully he sees a soft smile on your face. You hand covering your mouth "your lucky iam not mad" when heard you say that it felt like a heavy weight got off of his back. He attacked you with a bone crushing hug with kisses and multiple 'sorry's about yesterday. You couldn't stop smiling,cheeks hurting from smiling actually, just like satoru. You helped him with making dinner. You don't know when was the last time you had a proper dinner with him. It doesn't matters now. All that matters right now is satoru.
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zyafics-recs · 1 day ago
Note
reblogging comment review from @zyafics
SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO REBLOG, I WAS PACKING TO MOVE 🙂‍↕️ always these r my comments on my first AND SECOND read through because im actually obsessed with them ⬇️
also the two songs i've been playing on repeat for this fic is everytime by ariana grande and y.d.l.r by tory lanez. take from that as u will 😌
Hockey and, well, the fact that you hadn’t missed a game since… well, since Rafe and you broke up.
i cannot tell u how giggly i am rn
God, why did he always have to look so fucking good? His broad shoulders filling out his number 17 jersey, that stupid confident smirk as he skated out with the rest of the team. His dark blonde hair peeked out from under his helmet He was captain this year, and it made sense—he’d been working his ass off since…ever. You couldn’t think of anyone more deserving than him. 
i love this so MUCH SO SO SO MUCH
You knew better than to be here, yet somehow you ended up courtside anyway. Probably because you’d never let him run you out of your favorite game. Not even if he was captain now. This was your team, the one you’d been coming to see since before Rafe even knew what a slapshot was.
i unfortunately do not know what a slapshot is
You sank further into Elijah’s side, forcing your eyes away from your ex. But it wasn’t until you caught the dark blue of the jersey you were wearing in the corner of your eye that you realized… You’d put on Rafe’s jersey. 
YOU TOOK MY IDEA AHHHH 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️
You followed his gaze, heart dropping. They were zooming in on the two of you. You could feel the crowd around you start to cheer and whistle as Elijah leaned in closer, clearly getting ready to kiss you.
ohmygodohmygodohmygodddd
Bang!In the span of a second, a body slammed into the boards right in front you, the sound so loud it made you jump. The entire section gasped, and you turned your head just in time to see Rafe standing there, glaring up at you from behind the glass. His eyes were locked on you, jaw clenched.
As he FUCKING SHOULD I AM LITERALLY ON THE EDGE OF MY SEATTT
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That was what had your pulse racing. You could barely focus on Elijah anymore. The way he laughed, oblivious, made your stomach churn because Rafe—Rafe—was staring like he owned you. He always had this way of making you feel like no matter what, no matter who else was around, you were his. 
choose me love me fuck me (who said that)
Then, still staring at you, he mouthed the words, "I dare you."
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When the kiss ended, you forced a smile at Elijah, but your mind was a mess. Rafe’s eyes were still on you, and you could practically feel anger radiating off him, even through the thick glass.
his jealousy is RADIATING and i’m eating all of it up
“Bullshit,” he growled, leaning in closer, so close you could feel the heat radiating off his body. “You knew exactly what you were doing. Bringing a date with you. Do you want me to kill someone?"
sometimes yes pls prove how obsessed u r w me
“I hate you,” you muttered. It was a weak defense, and you both knew it.
my favorite part of hate sex when they r LIARS
Rafe leaned in, lips brushing against your ear. “Yeah?” His voice was a low rasp that made your knees weak. “Funny, you never sound like you hate me when you’re under me.”
HES SUCH A DICK
His tongue slipped past your lips, and you bit down, hard, just to remind him you weren’t going to make this easy. He groaned, low and rough, pulling back just enough to look at you, his gaze dark. "You always did like it rough."
OH I FUCKING LOVE HERRR
But he wasn’t having it. His grip tightened, his mouth capturing yours again in a kiss so raw, it was borderline filthy. And that was it. Your last piece of control vanished, and you were lost in him all over again.
HE DOESNT EVEN LET HER ANSWER why is this so hotttt
Rafe just laughed, “No, you don’t,” he growled, his hands grabbing your hips as he settled you onto one of the locker room benches. “But keep telling yourself that.”
i’m so quiet bc i’m so into this 🫣🫣🫣🫣
“You’re mine,” Rafe growled, his voice rough as he thrust into you, each movement deep and brutal.“Doesn’t matter who you’re with, doesn’t matter how much you try to deny it—you’ll always come back to me.”
ONE FUCKING CHANCE
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He pulled out suddenly, and before you could catch your breath, he yanked you up, turning you around. You barely had time to register what was happening before he lifted you up, your legs wrapping around his waist as he pressed you against the cold locker. His cock was back inside you in seconds, filling you again, and you moaned, the new angle sending jolts of pleasure through your already overstimulated pussy.
he’s INSATIABLE
“Go back to your date,” Rafe continued, his voice mocking now, “Pretend like he’s enough for you.”
YKW FUCK U I WILL
He knew it too. "I never wanted to lose you," he admitted quietly.You swallowed hard, your chest tight. "You already did."
so u give me earth-shattering smut and emotional angst? screw u
💌 i am absolutely enamored by the way u wrote their tension, how rafe fucking banged against the plexiglass and DARES her ohmygod i melted in a fucking puddle. ur smut was absolutely hot scorning riveting AND I WAS SO SURPRISED BY THIS MANS STAMINA LIKE CAN WE CATCH A BREATHE ugh ☺️💘 u did my req so much justice n gave me sm inspo i must write now
ex!reader who loves the game and wants to support her team but hockey captain!rafe is on the ice. he thinks she’s there for him but when she comes in with a date? and when they get put on the kiss cam? rafe slams into the glass to scare them? hate sex????
someone who lets you break them twice - hockey!toxic!rafe x ex!reader (+18)
warnings: veryyy long and 99% smut🙂‍↕️ the things i do for you...
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The cold air inside the rink always made your skin tingle. Your breath curled in front of you like smoke as you moved uncomfortably on the bleachers, pulling your jacket tighter around you. This is why you hated fall. It was too cold to be outside, too early to be winter. But tonight wasn’t about the weather—it was about hockey.
Hockey and, well, the fact that you hadn’t missed a game since… well, since Rafe and you broke up.
“Everything okay?” The voice beside you pulled you back to reality.
Elijah, the guy you’d been seeing for the past couple of weeks, smiled at you, oblivious to the bullshit taking over your mind, and you gave him your best smile back.
“Yeah, just cold,” you said, trying to focus. You weren’t here for Rafe, not anymore. You loved hockey. You loved watching the boys skate across the ice, their power and grace.
Or at least that was what you kept telling yourself.
Elijah wrapped an arm around you, pulling you closer to him, and you leaned in, feeling his warmth. The game was just about to start, and the arena lights dimmed slightly, casting shadows over the rink. The roar of the crowd drowned your thoughts for a moment as the players took the ice.
And then, as if the universe was personally trying to screw with you, you saw him.
Rafe.
Of course, he looked good.
God, why did he always have to look so fucking good? His broad shoulders filling out his number 17 jersey, that stupid confident smirk as he skated out with the rest of the team. His dark blonde hair peeked out from under his helmet He was captain this year, and it made sense—he’d been working his ass off since…ever. You couldn’t think of anyone more deserving than him. 
He always had to be in charge, on and off the ice.
He still had that same cocky swagger that made you wanna scream… for entirely different reasons now.
You knew better than to be here, yet somehow you ended up courtside anyway. Probably because you’d never let him run you out of your favorite game. Not even if he was captain now. This was your team, the one you’d been coming to see since before Rafe even knew what a slapshot was.
You sank further into Elijah’s side, forcing your eyes away from your ex. But it wasn’t until you caught the dark blue of the jersey you were wearing in the corner of your eye that you realized… You’d put on Rafe’s jersey. 
His number. The one you’d always worn to support him when you were together. Out of all the team merch you owned, of course you had to wear his.
“You really like hockey a lot, huh?” Elijah asked, glancing down at your jersey.
“Yeah,” You mumbled, feeling your cheeks heat up. “I’ve been following the team for a while.”
Lies. You loved hockey, sure. But you loved Rafe a little more. Or, you used to. Or, well, maybe that was still complicated.
The puck dropped, and the game started. For a while, you tried to focus on the action. Rafe was all over the ice, playing like the goddamn superstar he thought he was. You couldn’t help but notice how his gaze kept darting up toward the stands, like he knew you were there. And maybe he did
Halfway through the second period, he slammed into an opposing player, sending him crashing into the boards. The sound echoed through the arena, and the crowd went wild, but you could feel your stomach knotting up. That had always been Rafe—intense, aggressive, unable to hold back. On the ice or off.
You tried to focus on Elijah, laughing at something he was saying, but your heart wasn’t in it. And then, just when you thought you’d survived the worst of it, the kiss cam flashed up on the big screen. Your laughter died in your throat as you realized what was happening, your face heating up instantly. You weren’t exactly embarrassed, but this was... awkward. 
“Aw, how cute,” He said, grinning as he pointed to the screen.
You followed his gaze, heart dropping. They were zooming in on the two of you. You could feel the crowd around you start to cheer and whistle as Elijah leaned in closer, clearly getting ready to kiss you.
You could see him coming toward you, could see his lips getting closer, but all you could think about was—
Bang!
In the span of a second, a body slammed into the boards right in front you, the sound so loud it made you jump. The entire section gasped, and you turned your head just in time to see Rafe standing there, glaring up at you from behind the glass. His eyes were locked on you, jaw clenched.
He looked like he was ready to tear Elijah apart, or you, or both of you. His chest was heaving, eyes blazing, standing mere inches away from where you sat. He had skated right into the glass.
Your heart was practically in your throat, and it wasn't from Elijah being close. The look on Rafe’s face as he stood on the other side of the glass?
That was what had your pulse racing. You could barely focus on Elijah anymore. The way he laughed, oblivious, made your stomach churn because Rafe—Rafe—was staring like he owned you. He always had this way of making you feel like no matter what, no matter who else was around, you were his. 
And you hated that you still kind of liked it.
Then, still staring at you, he mouthed the words, "I dare you."
Why couldn’t he just leave you alone?
Those stupid words. Silently mouthed, but somehow loud enough to hit you like a punch through the glass. I dare you. God, what was wrong with him? He knew exactly how to push your buttons. And of course, it was working. He wasn’t just playing hockey—he was playing with you.
You could feel Elijah shifting next to you, still oblivious to the whole freaking drama unfolding right in front of him.
He was so sweet, too sweet, and it was almost infuriating right now because Rafe was standing there, with his stupid intense eyes, all but daring you to move on. Why did he have to look at you like that—like he knew you were still his.
The breakup had been brutal, the kind of messy, loud explosion where neither of you were willing to be the first to walk away. You were both too stubborn, too prideful. And now here you were, months later, still dealing with the fallout. 
Elijah finally leaned in, lips brushing yours, and you kissed him, but your heart wasn’t in it. All you could feel was Rafe’s stare burning into you. The kiss cam lingered for a few seconds, and the crowd cheered, but all you felt was... empty.
When the kiss ended, you forced a smile at Elijah, but your mind was a mess. Rafe’s eyes were still on you, and you could practically feel anger radiating off him, even through the thick glass.
You glanced down, avoiding his gaze, and tugged at the hem of his old jersey, suddenly feeling like you didn’t belong in it anymore. You leaned into Elijah, mostly out of spite at this point. You could practically hear Rafe’s teeth grinding from across the glass. Good. If he thought he could just walk around, acting like he owned the place—and you—then he deserved to stew in it a little.
But, of course, he wasn’t the kind of guy to just let something like that go. You watched as he skated back into play, but his eyes kept flicking up to where you sat, like he couldn’t stop checking to make sure you were still there. Still with Elijah. His shoulders were tense, movements a little too aggressive, like he was about to snap.
You tried to focus on the game again, but your mind kept drifting back to him. You hated this. You hated that he could still make you feel this way, even now, after everything.
After the fights, after the breakup, after swearing you were over him. Why was it so hard to let him go?
The third period started, and Rafe was everywhere, throwing his weight around like he had something to prove. And maybe he did. Every hit was harder, every pass sharper. It was like he was playing angry. And you couldn’t help but feel a little satisfied, knowing you’d gotten under his skin.
But then, with less than five minutes left in the game, things escalated. He slammed into one of the opposing players so hard that the guy went down, and the whistle blew immediately. The crowd was roaring, but Rafe didn’t back off. He stood over the guy, glaring down at him like he was ready to throw a punch.
"Jesus," Elijah muttered beside you. "What the hell’s his problem?"
You didn’t answer. You knew exactly what his problem was.
The ref skated over, shouting something at Rafe, but his eyes weren’t on the ref. They were still on you, even as the other guy on the ice slowly got back to his feet. The arena was buzzing, the crowd getting rowdy, and for a second, you thought Rafe was going to lose it right there. His fists clenched, jaw set—he looked like he was ready to drop gloves and start swinging.
And then he smirked.
It was that same cocky smirk you knew so well, the one he always flashed right before doing something reckless. The ref sent him to the penalty box, and he skated off, still with that fucking look plastered on his face. Your heart was racing, your body tense. Elijah had leaned back in his seat, totally unaware about everything.
“Man, that guy’s intense,” Elijah said, shaking his head, eyes still on the ice.
You didn’t answer. Intense didn’t even begin to cover it.
Rafe was sitting in the penalty box now, helmet off, running a hand through his hair like he didn’t just about murder a guy on the ice. You could feel his eyes on you, even from all the way across the rink. You hated it. You hated that he could still get to you like this.
The last few minutes of the game passed in an instant. You weren’t really paying attention anymore, not to the score, not to the plays. You were too busy trying not to think about Rafe, about the way he had looked at you. About the way it had made you feel.
When the final buzzer sounded, the crowd erupted in cheers. Elijah stood up, stretching, turning to you with a smile.
“Ready to head out?” he asked.
You nodded, forcing a smile. “Yeah, let’s go.”
As you made your way toward the exit, weaving through the crowd, you could feel the tension building in your chest. It wasn’t over. It never really was with Rafe.
And you knew—somehow—you weren’t getting out of here without seeing him again.
You reached the bottom of the stands, where a crowd had gathered near the exit. Elijah was still chatting about the game, still clueless. But you were distracted, scanning the crowd without even realizing it.
And then you saw him. Of course, you did.
Rafe was leaning against the wall, still in his gear, helmet tucked under his arm. His eyes locked on yours the second you stepped into his line of sight. He didn’t even pretend to care about the people around him—his gaze was dark, intense, like a predator waiting for its moment.
You hated how your heart skipped.
Elijah noticed you freeze and followed your gaze, his smile faltering when he saw Rafe standing there.
"Isn’t that the captain guy?" he asked, glancing between you and Rafe, confused.
You swallowed hard, forcing your feet to keep moving. “Yeah. That’s him.”
As you passed by, Rafe pushed off the wall, stepping right into your path. Elijah, sweet, unsuspecting Elijah, paused beside you.
"Leaving already?" Rafe’s voice was low, casual, but his eyes were locked on yours, ignoring Elijah completely. "Didn’t even stick around to congratulate the team?"
You clenched your jaw, fighting to keep your cool. "It’s late, Rafe. We’re heading out."
But he wasn’t letting you off that easy. He took a step closer, his towering frame making Elijah shift uncomfortably. "You didn’t used to leave so soon," he said, voice dripping with that familiar cockiness. "Used to be the last one out."
Because you’d always let him fuck you in the locker room.
Elijah cleared his throat, trying to stand his ground. "Uh, yeah, we’ve got plans after this."
Rafe’s eyes flicked to him for the briefest second, before landing back on you.
"Plans, huh?"
Your pulse was hammering, and you could feel the heat rising in your cheeks. Why did he always have to do this—why couldn’t he just let you go?
“Rafe, we’re done,” you said through gritted teeth, trying to hold on to the last shred of your composure. “You don’t get to pull this shit anymore.”
He glanced at Elijah briefly, his gaze cold and dismissive, then back at you. “You sure about that?” he asked, “Because it doesn’t look like it.”
You clenched your fists, nails biting into your palms as you tried to calm yourself. You didn’t need this right now. Not with Elijah here. Not after everything.
“Let’s go Elijah,” you said, tugging at Elijah’s arm, desperate to get out of there before things escalated. But Rafe wasn’t having it.
He stepped in front of you again, blocking your path like he had some kind of claim on you. And God, the worst part was—you weren’t sure he was wrong.
You glanced at Elijah, who was staring at the two of you like he had walked into the middle of a conversation he couldn’t quite follow. “Look, dude,” he started, awkwardly laughing, “I don’t know what this is, but—”
“It’s nothing,” you cut him off quickly, your voice tight. “Let’s just go.”
But Rafe wasn’t about to let it go. 
“Yeah, Elijah,” His voice dripped with sarcasm. “It’s nothing.” His eyes flicked to you, dark and daring, and before you could stop yourself, you met his gaze with the same fire.
Elijah’s phone buzzed, and he pulled it out, frowning.
“Shit,” he muttered, distracted. “I’ve gotta take this call real quick. Give me a sec?” He stepped away, leaving you and Rafe standing there in the middle of the hallway, your body practically vibrating.
He was on you in an instant, grabbing your wrist and pulling you toward the locker room door. 
“Rafe, what the fuck—” you hissed, but he wasn’t letting go.
You tried to resist, but something inside you broke down—the anger, the unresolved pull between you two. And maybe it was the way he still had that stupid hold on you, the way your body responded when you shouldn’t want it to.
Or maybe it was the fact that you’d never fully closed the door on Rafe.
He shoved the door open, pulling you inside the dimly lit hallway that led to the locker room. The second the door closed, you spun around, shoving him in the chest hard. 
“You’re such a fucking asshole, you know that?”
Rafe barely flinched, his gaze smoldering as he crowded you against the wall. 
“Yeah? You didn’t seem to think so when you were wearing my jersey tonight.”
“That was an accident.”
“Bullshit,” he growled, leaning in closer, so close you could feel the heat radiating off his body. “You knew exactly what you were doing. Bringing a date with you. Do you want me to kill someone?"
Your heart was pounding, and not just because Rafe had you pinned against the wall like he always fucking did— God, why did he have to be so damn close? The scent of his cologne mixed with the sweat from the game, sending your mind spiraling. He was overwhelming, and you hated it. You hated him for still making you feel like this.
“Get off me,” you snapped, but it came out weaker than you intended. The way his blue eyes were boring into yours, like he could see through all your bullshit, wasn’t helping.
Rafe’s smirk didn’t falter. If anything, it grew.
“C’mon, baby, don’t act like this wasn’t what you wanted. You show up, wearin’ my number, sitting there with some random guy like I don’t still own you.” 
He stepped closer, caging you in completely. You pressed your hands against his chest, but it wasn’t like you were really pushing him away. And he knew it.
“You don’t own shit,” you spat, glaring up at him. But even as the words left your mouth, you knew you didn’t believe them. The truth was, part of you had always been his.
Rafe’s lips curved into a smug grin as if he could read every thought running through your head.
“Really? ’Cause from where I’m standin’, you’ve been thinkin’ about me all night.” His breath was hot on your skin, and you hated how much you wanted to close the distance between you.
Your jaw clenched as you tried to muster the strength to tell him to fuck off, to leave you alone, but he was right. As much as you tried to convince yourself otherwise, he was still in your head, under your skin. The way his body hovered over yours—it was like nothing had changed. Like you hadn’t spent the last few months trying to forget him.
His hand found your hip, fingers pressing into your skin through your jeans, and you felt your body betray you. You cursed yourself silently as heat pooled low in your stomach. You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction, didn’t want him to know how much power he still had. But damn it, he knew. He always fucking knew.
“I hate you,” you muttered. It was a weak defense, and you both knew it.
Rafe leaned in, lips brushing against your ear. “Yeah?” His voice was a low rasp that made your knees weak. “Funny, you never sound like you hate me when you’re under me.”
Your breath hitched, and you swallowed hard, trying to ignore the way your pulse quickened.
“Don’t—”
But he was already kissing you, hard and rough like he owned you, like you were his and his alone.
And the worst part? You kissed him back. His hands were on you, grabbing at your waist, pulling you closer until your bodies were pressed together. You wanted to shove him away, to slap that stupid look off his face—but your body had other plans. 
This was so wrong, on so many levels. 
You broke the kiss, gasping for air, but Rafe didn’t back off. He was staring down at you like you were his next meal, like he’d been starving without you.
“This doesn’t mean anything,” you bit out, trying to cling to some sense of control.
Rafe’s grin widened, wicked and knowing. He leaned in again, lips ghosting over yours. “We both know that's a lie.”
You clenched your fists, frustrated beyond belief. Frustrated at him, at yourself, at how easy it was for him to pull you right back in.
“Fuck you,” you hissed, but the breathless tone in your voice told a different story.
Rafe’s eyes darkened, the corner of his mouth lifting in that infuriatingly sexy way he always did.
“Oh, you will.”
And God help you—you knew he was right. That fucking arrogance. It crawled under your skin, set your blood on fire in ways it shouldn’t.
You wanted to punch him, shove him, do something to wipe that smug expression off his face. But instead, you grabbed his shirt, pulling him back toward you, kissing him with all the fury you felt.
His lips crushed against yours, and it wasn’t gentle—there was nothing soft or sweet about this. It was all heat and frustration, months of unresolved anger bursting out in one chaotic, messy kiss.
His tongue slipped past your lips, and you bit down, hard, just to remind him you weren’t going to make this easy. He groaned, low and rough, pulling back just enough to look at you, his gaze dark. "You always did like it rough."
Your fingers tangled in his hair, and you yanked him down, kissing him like you needed to get all of this out of your system. His hands roamed your body, possessive, rough, and you hated how much you craved him, like you were still his.
You weren’t his. You couldn’t be.
But every heated breath you took, every desperate movement your body made, was telling you otherwise.
When his lips moved down your neck, teeth grazing your skin, you gasped, tilting your head back as your resolve crumbled to pieces. He knew exactly what to do, how to make you fall apart, and it pissed you off that he still had that power.
His hands gripped your thighs, lifting you with ease, pressing you harder against the wall. Your breath hitched, the cold tile behind you making you gasp. His mouth was on you, hot and demanding, and for a moment, it was like nothing else mattered.
Not Elijah, not the fact that this was so damn wrong, not the months of hurt and anger you’d been holding onto.
There was only Rafe. The way he touched you, the way he kissed you like he was trying to stake his claim all over again. Like you hadn’t been apart at all.
"Tell me you don’t want this," Rafe muttered against your lips.
You bit down on your lip, trying to stop the words from spilling out. You did want this. You hated that you did, but fuck, you couldn’t lie—not to him, not to yourself.
“I—” You choked on the words, eyes meeting his, and for a split second, you thought maybe you’d find some kind of resolve, some way to pull yourself back from him.
But he wasn’t having it. His grip tightened, his mouth capturing yours again in a kiss so raw, it was borderline filthy. And that was it. Your last piece of control vanished, and you were lost in him all over again.
“Fuck,” you gasped, head spinning as his hands explored your body like he had every right to. Like you hadn’t spent months trying to break free of him.
Rafe pulled back just enough to smirk down at you, breathless and flushed. “Yeah, baby. That's what I thought."
His hands gripped your ass hard enough to leave bruises, you let out a frustrated, muffled groan, your fingers still tangled in his hair. It was a lot longer than the last time you’d seen him.
You could feel every inch of his muscle through the thin fabric of your shirt. It was suffocating in the best way, and you hated yourself for how much you wanted it.
How much you wanted him.
“You’re such an ass,” you gasped between kisses, your breath hitching when his mouth moved down to your neck. You felt him grin against your skin, the bastard.
“You say that like it’s supposed to stop you.” His voice was rough, low in your ear, and it sent a shiver down your spine. “But I don’t think it is.”
You were about to fire back, but his hands slid under your shirt, fingers grazing your skin, and whatever you were going to say was swallowed by the heat rushing through you. You hated that he still knew exactly how to get to you—how to pull you apart and leave you helpless against him.
“Rafe, this—” Your words were cut off when he bit down gently on your collarbone, sending a shockwave through your body. You clutched at his shirt.
“This what?” he taunted, pulling back just enough to look at you, his blue eyes intense. “This a mistake? Because I don’t think that’s what your body’s saying.”
You just glared up at him, trying to catch your breath. You hated that he was right. Again.
Always.
“I told you,” you managed to say, though your voice was shaky, “this doesn’t mean anything.”
Rafe’s grip on you tightened, and he leaned in, his lips brushing yours as he whispered, “You’re still here, aren’t you?”
Your heart was racing, and you could feel the heat of his breath on your skin. There was no denying it—you were here, and you weren’t leaving. Not yet.
Maybe not for a while.
And Rafe knew it.
His hands moved lower, fingers grazing the waistband of your jeans, and your breath hitched. This was dangerous territory. You knew that. 
“Last chance,” he murmured, his lips ghosting over yours. “You want me to stop?”
You should’ve said yes. You should’ve shoved him away and walked out of there with what little dignity you had left. But instead, you kissed him again—harder this time, angrier, like you needed to prove something to yourself. And maybe you did.
He yanked your shirt over your head in one rough motion, and you weren’t gentle either, tugging at his jersey until it was off and tossed aside. His hands were everywhere—on your back, in your hair, slipping under the waistband of your jeans, pulling them down with the same reckless urgency you’d been feeling since you laid eyes on him tonight.
“I hate you,” you whispered as your nails dragged down his chest, leaving angry red lines in their wake.
Rafe just laughed, “No, you don’t,” he growled, his hands grabbing your hips as he settled you onto one of the locker room benches. “But keep telling yourself that.”
Your jeans hit the floor, and he wasted no time, his hands gripping your thighs as he positioned himself between your legs, pressing you down on the bench, his body heavy against yours.
Everything was messy, and rushed, like neither of you could get enough. Like you were trying to erase the months of distance, of frustration, in the way you kissed him back, bit his lip, tugged at his hair.
 You hated how much you needed this. 
“Still think this doesn’t mean anything?” Rafe rasped, his voice hoarse as he pressed his forehead against yours, breathless and wild.
You could barely think, let alone speak, but somehow, you managed to gasp out, “Positive.”
Rafe’s mouth moved down your neck, biting and sucking, leaving marks you knew would still be there tomorrow. “You’re such a fucking liar.”
It was wrong, it was toxic, but fuck—there was something about the way he touched you. And body, traitorous and weak, responded like it always had.
You were furious with yourself, with him, with everything, but the anger only made it all hotter, more intense.
His fingers brushed against the seam of your panties, teasing, barely touching you, but doing enough to have you drenched. 
“You’re soaked,” he murmured, almost amused, slipping one finger under the fabric to run along your folds, barely dipping inside before pulling back out, "Was this all for Elijah?"
Sonofabitch.
“Stop talking,” you spat, but your voice was shaky, showing him the way you were falling apart under his touch. Rafe chuckled low in his throat, his finger moving back, this time slipping inside you, deep and slow.
You gasped, your head falling back as he began moving his finger, curling it inside you in just the right way. Your body responded immediately, hips jerking against him, desperate for more, but he took his time. He added another finger, stretching you out as his thumb rubbed slow circles over your clit, making your legs tremble beneath him.
He sped up, his fingers thrusting deeper, faster, hitting that spot inside you that made your mind go blank. “You’ve been wanting this, haven’t you? All those nights pretending you don’t think about me, but look at you now.”
Your nails dug into his shoulders, legs shaking as you felt yourself teetering on the edge, his fingers driving you closer and closer to the orgasm you so desperately needed.
His thumb pressed harder against your clit, sending shocks of pleasure through you. “Tell me how bad you need this.”
“Rafe—” you gasped, your hips bucking wildly against his hand. The tension inside you was coiled so tightly, so close to snapping. You hated him, hated yourself, but the words slipped out anyway. “I need it.”
He groaned, pleased, and that was all it took. He thrust his fingers harder, faster, until your body gave in completely. You hadn’t had a proper orgasm in months. Nothing could get you off properly. Your walls clenched around his fingers the pleasure tore through you. You cried out, your nails leaving half-moon marks in his skin as you trembled beneath him, lost in the sensation.
But he didn’t stop. He slowed down just enough to draw out every last bit of pleasure, his fingers still moving inside you as you rode out the aftershocks. When you finally caught your breath, he pulled his fingers out, his hand moving to cup your jaw, forcing you to look at him.
He shoved his pants down, not bothering to take them off completely, just enough to free himself. Your breath hitched when you felt him against you—hard, hot, and ready—and every rational thought you had left disappeared in that moment. He lined himself up, teasing you just enough to drive you crazy.
Before you could respond, he pushed into you in one hard, deliberate thrust. Your gasp turned into a low, breathless moan as your back arched, your hands gripping his shoulders for something to hold on to. The sensation of him stretching you, filling you, was overwhelming, almost too much, but exactly what you needed.
Rafe didn’t give you time to adjust. He pulled back and slammed into you again, setting a punishing rhythm that left you breathless, gasping for air. 
There was nothing gentle about it, nothing tender.
His hands gripped your hips, fingers digging into your skin as he fucked you like he was trying to remind you who you belonged to.
And you hated how good it felt.
“You’re mine,” Rafe growled, his voice rough as he thrust into you, each movement deep and brutal.“Doesn’t matter who you’re with, doesn’t matter how much you try to deny it—you’ll always come back to me.”
“Shut up,” you hissed, but your body was betraying you as you wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him deeper. 
He leaned down, his breath hot against your ear as he whispered, “Tell me you haven’t been thinking about this every night since we ended.”
You couldn’t.
The words were right there, on the tip of your tongue, but instead, a moan escaped your lips as he hit that perfect spot inside you. Your body arched against his, and you cursed yourself for being so weak.
“Fuck,” you gasped, eyes squeezed shut as the pleasure built, every nerve in your body on fire.
“That’s what I thought,” Rafe growled, his pace quickening, the force of his thrusts making the bench creak beneath you.
The sound of the bench, the way his body pressed into yours so perfectly, the heat of his breath against your neck—it all made it impossible to think straight. You should have been disgusted with yourself for letting it get this far, for letting him have this kind of control over you. 
“I fucking hate you,” you managed to gasp out between breaths.
Rafe chuckled, “Yeah? Then why do you sound like that, huh?” His voice was taunting, filled with the arrogance you hated, “This pussy still mine, huh?”
You loved the way he grabbed you like you were his, even though you’d sworn, sworn, you were done with him.
You were still in love, weren’t you? Even after all the shit, all the screaming matches, the nights spent crying because of him. That was the part that pissed you off the most.
Before you knew, his hands were flipping you over so fast your knees hit the bench before you could react.
“Rafe—mmh,” you gasped, but your words died in your throat when he shoved you forward, pressing your chest flat against the cold wood of the bench. You barely had a second to brace yourself before his hands were gripping your ass, spreading you open for him.
He didn’t give you time to catch your breath. He was already dragging the head of his cock through your wetness, teasing, knowing how much you wanted it, even if you wouldn’t say it.
You squirmed, hating how desperate you felt, hating how your body responded to him like this. “Fuck, Rafe, stop teasing—”
“You want more?” he cut you off, voice dark and dripping with arrogance. He slapped your ass, just enough to sting, and you yelped, your back arching instinctively. “You’re gonna have to beg for it.”
"Like hell," you spat back.
He leaned forward, his chest pressing against your back, his mouth right by your ear.
 “You can act tough all you want, but I know how much you want this,” he gritted out, his cock sliding against your folds again, torturously slow. “I know how much you need it.”
Before you could snap back, he thrust into you hard, filling you completely in one brutal stroke. You cried out, hands gripping the edges of the bench, and Rafe didn’t even give you a second to adjust. He pulled out almost all the way before slamming back in, faster this time, deeper.
The angle had you seeing stars. The bench was narrow, forcing your legs closer together, making everything tighter, more intense. You couldn’t stop the way your body responded to him, hips moving back to meet his thrusts even though your mind was screaming at you to get a grip.
His hands gripped the fat of your ass, pulling you back onto his cock with every thrust, and the sound of skin slapping against skin filled the small room, mixing with your moans and his ragged breathing.
“God, you feel so fucking good,” Rafe groaned, his voice low and rough as he thrust into you, each movement hitting that perfect spot inside you, making your legs tremble. “So fucking tight for me.”
He pressed his thumb against your clit, rubbing in slow, deliberate circles that had you on the edge in seconds. You couldn’t stop the moan that ripped from your throat, your hips bucking wildly against him as the pleasure built, higher and higher until you felt like you might break apart.
“You’re close, aren’t you?” He rasped, his voice thick with lust. “I can feel it. Fuck.”
You tried to hold on, tried to keep some control, but it was useless. He knew exactly how to break you.
“I’m gonna come,” you gasped, your voice barely more than a whimper as you felt the pleasure rising fast, threatening to consume you.
“Do it,” Rafe growled, his fingers rubbing harder, faster. “Come for me, baby.”
And you did.
Your orgasm crashed over you so hard your vision blurred, your body shaking as the pleasure tore through you. You cried out, your walls clenching around him, and Rafe groaned, his grip on you tightening as he fucked you through it, relentless, brutal, until your entire body was trembling.
But he wasn’t done.
He pulled out suddenly, and before you could catch your breath, he yanked you up, turning you around. You barely had time to register what was happening before he lifted you up, your legs wrapping around his waist as he pressed you against the cold locker. His cock was back inside you in seconds, filling you again, and you moaned, the new angle sending jolts of pleasure through your already overstimulated pussy.
He pounded into you, his grip on your ass bruising, and you clung to him, nails digging into his broad shoulders as he fucked you against the lockers. The sound of metal creaking under the force of his thrusts only made it hotter, more desperate. You could feel another orgasm building, and you hated him for it—hated how easily he could pull them from you. 
“You’re mine,” he growled, his voice rough as he buried his face in your neck, his teeth scraping against your skin. “You’ll always be mine.”
And you hated that some twisted part of you wanted it to be true.
Your legs tightened around him, pulling him impossibly closer, deeper, as if you couldn’t get enough of him.
And God, you couldn’t.
His grip on your ass was rough, bruising, but it only made you moan louder. You were on the verge again—your body still tingling from the last orgasm, but the way he moved inside you, the way his teeth grazed your neck, it had you spiraling toward another one, faster than you thought possible.
“Look at you,” Rafe groaned, lifting his head just enough to lock eyes with you. His pupils were blown wide with lust, a wild look on his face that sent a thrill down your spine. “Fuck, you love this, don’t you?”
You did. Because no matter how much you hated him, how much you wanted to hate him—there was a part of you that still belonged to him. A part of you that couldn’t walk away.
His lips were everywhere—on your neck, your collarbone, your jaw—and you couldn’t stop the sounds escaping your throat as he kept driving into you.
“Say it,” he growled, “Say you’re mine.”
You bit down on your lip, trying to hold it in, trying to fight back, but every nerve in your body was betraying you. The way his body fit against yours, the way he moved inside you, it was all too much. You were coming again, and you hated it.
He pulled back just enough to look at you, his eyes dark and wild. “Say it.”
You wanted to spit in his face. But your body was telling a different story, hips bucking against him, legs tightening around his waist again.
“R-Rafe,” you whimpered, hating how weak you sounded, how desperate.
His smirk was infuriating, but fuck, it was hot.
“That’s what I thought,” he murmured, his pace quickening, each thrust deeper than the last. “You’re mine. Always have been.”
And then he slammed into you one last time, hitting that perfect spot inside you, and the orgasm tore through you, leaving you gasping and trembling in his arms. You cried out, head thrown back against the lockers as your body shook with the force of it, your nails raking down his back.
Rafe groaned, his grip on you tightening as he rode out your orgasm, his movements growing sloppier, more erratic. His forehead pressed against yours, his breath coming in short, ragged gasps.
“Fuck, baby,” he moaned, his hips jerking against yours as he finally let go, his release hitting hard. You felt the warmth of him spill inside you, as he held you against him, buried deep.
The second his breathing slowed and his grip on you loosened, reality came crashing back in. 
What the fuck had you done?
You pushed at his chest, trying to put some space between you, but he wasn’t letting go that easily. His arms stayed wrapped around you, his body pressed against yours like he still had something to prove.
“Get off,” you muttered, your voice weak, but sharper than before.
He chuckled, that low, arrogant sound that drove you crazy. “That’s not what you were saying five minutes ago.”
You shot him a glare, shoving at his chest again, harder this time. “I’m serious, Rafe. Move.”
Reluctantly, he let go, stepping back just enough for you to slide off the locker and onto shaky legs. You stumbled a bit, and Rafe’s hand shot out to steady you, but you jerked away from him, pulling your jeans back up with shaky hands.
He leaned against the locker, smirking like he hadn’t just torn your world apart all over again. “You’re welcome, by the way.”
You wanted to scream at him, to throw something at his face. But instead, you grabbed your shirt off the floor, yanking it over your head as you tried to steady your breath.
“Good luck finding your date.”
Elijah. You’d come to the game with Elijah.
You shook your head as you zipped up your jeans and ran your fingers through your hair, trying to look somewhat presentable. You avoided looking at him, knowing that if you did, you’d see the smug satisfaction on his face that would only make you feel worse.
He pushed himself off the locker and took a step closer to you. You flinched, stepping back instinctively. “This can’t happen again.”
His smirk slipped for a moment as he looked at you. H e closed the distance between you in two strides, his hand reaching out to grab your wrist, pulling you toward him before you could react, “You’re choosing him?”
You yanked your wrist out of his grip, your heart racing as you forced yourself to take a step back, putting distance between the two of you, “You’re the one who chose yourself.”
His eyes darkened, searching your face, like he couldn’t believe what you’d just said. Maybe he thought he still had you wrapped around his finger.
“You’re the one who walked away,” you added, hating how your voice trembled, “So don’t act like I owe you anything.”
Rafe’s hand hovered like he was about to reach for you again, but he didn’t. “That’s not how I remember it.” 
Your stomach twisted, “I’m not doing this anymore. I can’t—” You glanced at the door, feeling the weight of Elijah waiting for you. The one person who was good for you, who actually wanted to be with you.
But the worst part? You were still thinking about Rafe. Even after everything, you were still here, breathless, a mess because of him.
He took a step closer, his eyes locked on yours, and for a second, you thought he might apologize. Maybe say something real. But Rafe Cameron didn’t do apologies. 
He raised an eyebrow, “Really?” His hand lifted, brushing a strand of hair out of your face in a gesture that was far too intimate, given everything that had just happened. “Then why are you still standing here?”
You flinched, stepping back. Why were you still standing there? You had no good answer, at least not one you were ready to admit.
“Go back to your date,” Rafe continued, his voice mocking now, “Pretend like he’s enough for you.”
You bit the inside of your cheek, trying to keep the tears at bay. You couldn’t give him that satisfaction, not again. “You’re wrong.”
Rafe let out a low chuckle, shaking his head. “I don’t think I am.”
You squeezed your eyes shut, throat tight, trying to push back the tears. This was all wrong. It was always wrong with Rafe, “Stop.”
It sounded like a plea—a plea for him to stop talking, stop looking at you like that, stop making you feel so small and yet so overwhelmed all at once.
Rafe sighed, stepping back just a fraction, and for a second, his gaze lifted. But it wasn’t enough. It never was. “I’m not trying to hurt you,” he said, his voice softer now, like that made a difference.
“You always do,” you shot back, finally meeting his eyes. The truth slipped out before you could stop it, and there it was.
His jaw clenched, "I don’t mean to," he muttered, his voice low. "You know that."
"Does it even matter?" You felt the bitterness rise in your throat, along with something else—something fragile and painful. "You still do it. Whether you mean to or not."
Rafe stayed quiet, and you hated that silence. He didn’t have an answer. He never did, not for this. Your fingers fumbled with the zipper of your jacket, something to keep your hands busy so you wouldn’t look at him, wouldn’t say something you’d regret. But regret was already everywhere, suffocating you both.
“I thought we were past this,” you said finally, barely more than a whisper. “I thought I was past this.” But clearly, you weren’t. Clearly, some part of you was still here, with him, in the wreckage you’d both created.
He ran a hand through his hair, looking frustrated, torn. “It’s not that simple.”
"It should be." Your voice cracked. You hated how much this hurt. How much he could still hurt you.
It wasn’t fair. You weren’t supposed to still care this much. You weren’t supposed to still feel this.
Rafe sighed, taking another step back, giving you space. But it wasn’t the kind of space you wanted. It wasn’t the kind that would make things easier. “I don’t know what you want from me,” he admitted quietly, his eyes searching yours for something he couldn’t find.
You swallowed, the lump in your throat making it hard to breathe. "I don’t want anything from you." 
That was the truth, or at least it was supposed to be. You didn’t want anything he had to offer, not anymore. Not when every time you reached for it, it slipped through your fingers like water, leaving you emptier than before.
But there was still that ache, that feeling between you two, the one that dragged you back here even when you knew better. You wished you could kill it, cut it out of you like some infected part, but it was tangled too deep. And maybe a small part of you didn’t want to.
“You keep saying that,” he murmured, his voice almost tender, like he was seeing right through you. “But you’re still here.”
“I don’t know why,” you whispered, blinking back tears. Fuck, you hated this. Hated how vulnerable you felt, how easily he could unravel you, even now. “I shouldn’t be.”
He didn’t say anything, just stood there, watching you, like he was waiting for you to make the next move. Like he wanted you to figure it out on your own.
But you didn’t know how. You never did when it came to him.
"I’m sorry," he said, and this time, it felt real. There was no arrogance. Just Rafe, standing there, as broken as you felt. "I don’t know how to fix this."
You let out a bitter laugh, wiping at your eyes with the back of your hand. “There’s nothing left to fix, Rafe. We’ve already destroyed it.”
His face twisted, like he didn’t want to believe it. Like he was still holding onto some small piece of hope. "We could—"
"No," you cut him off, shaking your head. "We can’t."
You couldn’t keep doing this. The push and pull, the endless cycle of hurt and apologies that never really fixed anything. You couldn’t keep pretending that something would change, that he would change.
Because you both knew he wouldn’t.
He took a breath, exhaling slowly, and you could see it—the realization sinking in. 
He knew it too. "I never wanted to lose you," he admitted quietly.
You swallowed hard, your chest tight. "You already did."
1K notes · View notes
fuctacles · 2 days ago
Text
<<😺😺😺😺😺😺😺
"Yes? Hello, officer? There's a man in my apartment." 
Eddie stirs awake, his surroundings coming back to him in hazy waves.
"What?" he slurs out, blinking to clear his vision.
"Oh, I was just telling the officer that I've found a man sleeping on my couch," Stephanie says with a troubled expression, hovering over him.
Over the couch that he fell asleep on.
He sits up so suddenly he loses his balance and falls back against the cushion.
"I'm so sorry, please don't call the cops—!"
Stephanie immediately shakes her hands, which are free of a phone.
"I was joking, I was joking!" she reassures him quickly. "I'm sorry." She smiles apologetically, taking a seat next to him. "I guess that wasn't the best way to wake up someone." 
"No," Eddie chuckles awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. "Especially not an ex-drug dealer," he huffs dryly. 
Steph cocks her head with a surprised "huh" and only then does Eddie realize what he has just blurted out. 
"Ah, shit. Am I ruining my good neighbor status?" he winces.
"Not at all," Steph shakes her head, and gently pats his knee. He zeroes his focus on her hand when she decides to rest it there on his jean-clad leg. 
"I know my nice neighbor Eddie, not the drug dealer one," she smiles reassuringly. "What made you turn around? If you don't mind me asking," she squeezes his knee and retrieves her hand to lean back more comfortably on the couch. One of her cats, Garfield, jumps on her lap for a greeting, and Eddie realizes she's still wearing her jacket. He looks at the clock on the wall and realizes it's almost midnight. 
"Sorry, I'm holding you back, you're clearly tired," she backtracks quickly, watching his eyes dart around. But Eddie shakes his head.
"Nah, I just took an invigorating nap." She laughs at that and he can't help but smile as well. "I'd assume you're tired after traveling."
"I took an invigorating nap on the bus," she smiles, petting her cat. Arwen finally decides she's not above greeting her human and jumps in next to her as well, occupying Stephanie's other hand. 
Eddie reminds himself not to get jealous of felines.
"I managed to graduate," he says and when Steph looks at him in confusion, he adds: "I dealt in high school to save money for my band, thought that was my only route. But then I did graduate, on my third try, and the art teacher pulled some strings, asked around, and told me I could go study music. The guys forced me to go for it," he smiles at the memory. "My band, I mean. They said at least one of us should know some theory," he chuckles. 
"That's very nice of them," Stephanie comments. 
"Yeah. The bastards followed me after high school too." He grins. 
"And I still haven't heard your music," she sighs wistfully. 
"I'll bring a tape next time," he promises. 
"You better."
They sit in silence for a while, only the cat's purring filling the night ambiance. 
"Want some tea?"
"I guess I should go."
They speak over each other, eyes wide when they meet awkwardly. They chuckle, and Eddie can feel his cheeks warm up.
"Or I can get us a beer? Since you're not an old lady," she offers, spotting the empty bottle on the table. "Unless you really need to go."
"Beer sounds good. Considering there are no old ladies here," he smiles charmingly, daring her to protest. 
Steph doesn't say anything, only rolls her eyes and gently nudges Garfield from her lap onto the couch cushions. She scratches Eddie's head when she passes, thankfully missing the way it causes his whole body to shiver. 
"Won't your uncle be worried where you are?" she asks from the kitchen, giving Eddie the space he needs to collect himself. 
"I told him I'd wait for you," he answers, scratching Garfield and trying to forget how good it felt when done to him. "Also, I don't have a curfew anymore. Never had, in fact. Not with Wayne."
"Lucky you." She steps back into the room, handing him a chilled bottle. "How long have you been living with him?"
"Since high school," he answers before taking a swig. "Spent a short time in a halfway house before that. My parents couldn't handle me anymore, but they managed to reach my uncle and he took me in."
"The hell do you mean 'couldn't handle you'?" Steph asks with a frown.
Eddie chuckles at her immediate offense.
"They got into legal trouble, and couldn't afford the house anymore, I think my dad spent some time in prison too. Tax fraud and shit, never cared enough to dig into it and Wayne doesn't like talking about them either. He's a better parent they'd ever be anyway."
"Yeah," Steph softens. "I'd love to have had someone like him back in the day." Then, she deflates with a sigh. "Though even the nicest people can turn out to be bigots. Not Wayne, of course!" she rushes to add. "He knows about Robin and he's really cool about it." 
Eddie sees his opening and feels comfortable enough to use it finally. 
"He better be, since his nephew is bisexual," he says with a little huff. 
"He is?" Steph picks up curiously. 
"Yeah," Eddie scratches his cheek, suddenly sheepish. "Turned out I wasn't watching Indiana Jones for the plot."
"I think that sweaty chest is plot enough," she says and they both laugh.
"Have you dated a guy, then?" Stephanie asks next. 
"Only one for real," Eddie admits. "But it's not like I've dated many girls either, though it is easier."
"A young bachelor like you?" Stephanie raises her eyebrows in surprise. "You should be swarming with marriage proposals, the way your uncle describes you."
Eddie groans, throwing his head back against the cushions. 
"What nonsense is he telling about me?"
"Only that he has a talented, smart boy in Indy, who's always helpful and protective of his friends and family. Also, he has really frizzy hair."
"Excuse me?"
Eddie picks up his head to look at Stephanie. She's suddenly closer than before, rubbing a lock of his hair between her fingers. 
"When was the last time you had your hair done?"
"Uh." He looks between her hand and her face like he'll find the answer there. "Never? Probably? At least not that I remember."
Stephanie's mouth purses with displeasure. 
"I can fix them for you. For taking care of my cats."
Eddie wants her hands in his hair so badly, but he raises his beer like a dumbass. 
"But I already got a beer," he points out. 
She shakes her head. 
"I share beers with friends for less. I'd usually buzz Wayne too, and you'd be doing me a favor because I can't focus with your split ends right in my face."
She's really playing it up, pout and all, and unfortunately, it's working on him. 
But he'd probably do anything she asked for. 
"Then, uh... Sure, I guess."
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norrisleclercf1 · 3 days ago
Note
i fear we are in dire need of a part 2 to this fic 😭😭
https://www.tumblr.com/norrisleclercf1/763607869452124160/possessive-toto-with-engineer-reader-lets?source=share
A/N: Sorry this took so long lovelies
Walking into the paddock you knew the whispers, but as you red the Ferrari red you knew it was a problem, but people didn't talk about the wearing Ferrari they mainly talked about the lack of wedding ring on your finger. When you woke all those months ago after leaving yours and Toto's hotel room, you stayed up with Lewis all night talking about your options.
After the race you arrived home to a packet of papers and your name on them and Toto sitting at the end of the table. You both just stared at one another when you slowly slipped your ring off, his face contorting in pain watching you do it. Sitting it down you moved like a ghost through your home and gathered your things and never looked back.
Now, almost 6 months later, here you are walking through the Bahrain paddock, the Mercedes people staring as you walked to the second motorhome, bright red and flashy. You never thought you'd be wearing Ferrari, hell you thought you'd wear papaya before this, but I guess life comes at you fast.
You freeze seeing Toto walking past talking to George who spots you and waves but stops when Toto grows quit and turns to stone almost instantly seeing you and turns right back around choosing to ignore you, which half the paddock notices but chooses not to speak on it.
"Hey," Lewis comes over and bumps your shoulder smiling brightly as he looks flawless, almost untouchable in the red. "Hi," You whisper and feel ice lick your spine as you turn seeing your husband stare at you with such cold rage you almost shiver at his look. "Come on, we've got a meeting," Lewis pulls you away as you look back seeing Toto still stare at you, but not with anger this time.
Heartbreak.
---------------------------------
Sighing you trudge yourself back to the hotel, exhaustion wrapping around you as you try your best to stay awake. You knew Ferrari would be demanding but not like this, you haven't been this tired since-, well it doesn't matter no, you wouldn't be falling asleep in his arms tonight anyways.
Just....just for a second, your mind tells you as your eyes fall shut, the elevator dings as it opens you blink slowly as you see Toto there and you both stare at one another but he says nothing as he steps in and says nothing. Fuck, you're so tired you feel like crying almost at the situation. Toto says nothing typing away at his phone as the elevator comes to a jumping halt almost making you lose balance.
"Ba-" Toto catches himself and slams his mouth shut as you catch yourself and sigh rubbing your eyes. "You stupid fucking piece of JUNK METAL!" You scream kicking the door as Toto stares at you. "Are you alright?" He asks softly, and you turn almost making him flinch with how hot your
"Am I alright? Alright? No I'm not alright Troger, I'm anything but alright. I'm exhausted, bone exhausted, to the point I want to cry, and I'll I'm trying to do is go up to my hotel room and sleep, but instead I'm stuck in the elevator with my ex husband WHO DIDN'T EVEN THE HAVE THE BALLS TO ASK ME FOR A DIVORCE!" You scream as Toto stares at you.
"I never asked for a divorce, we're not divorced," Toto says as you take deep breaths, "What," You breath as Toto stares at you. "We're not divorced, Y/n, why would you think that?" Toto asks, putting up his phone up you notice him wearing his wedding ring, but something around his neck catches your attention.
"The papers, the papers on the kitchen table, when I came home," You stammer, and Toto's eyes grow wide. "Those weren't divorce papers they were your contract Ferrari, I...I wanted to negotiate how we should break your Mercedes contract, I never wanted a divorce," Toto whispers and you stare at him.
"What?" You whisper, running your hands down your face as Toto just stares. "The papers were your Ferrari contract, not our divorce papers. Do you honestly, think I'd let you go over this? Are you fucking serious?" Toto seethes, voice almost shaking the elevator
"I just....I just thought,-" Toto cuts you off, "You thought, you thought I'd divorce you over this? Did you truly question my love for you like that? I lost...we lost months of our marriage because of a fucking MISUNDERSTANDING?" Toto seethes and you step back as he steps forward and yanks your ring off his neck. "You ever, and I mean ever take this ring off you better hope it's because I'm dead," He whispers and you nod your head slowly.
"Okay," You whisper as Toto takes your finger and slides the ring on. "Never again," He whispers, "And don't think you'll go to that pathetic hotel room, we'll go to our suite," He grumbles as the elevator kicks back on as you just nod, loving the weight on your finger
---------------------------------
Tagging those that wanted a part 2:
@imchiarashelby1 @annewithaneofthegreengable @alliseeiscarlossainz @lovecarsgoingvroom @newlifeforus @1800-love-me @honkyscats @pear-1206 @colorfulbluebirddeer @geniusalpaca @wertyuizxcvbnm
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nocasdatsgay · 2 days ago
Text
A Lesson in Heartbreak
2 of 3: Words are Painful Weapons
Rating: T | Word Count: 3983 | Pairing: Azris/Reader
Summary: Eris and Azriel made promises they didn’t keep. When you confront them about it, Eris says some things he instantly regrets. Now him and Azriel have to fix what they broke.
Neapolitan Bonds Masterlist| Read on A03| Part 1| Read Below
Warnings: Angst, Eris has a sharp tongue, alcohol, drunk!Eris
A/N: HI so… yeah… I am alive. Sorry this took so long. A second shout out to @daycourtofficial for inspiration with Azriel and his comments when he comes back.
Tagging: @myromanempiree @pit-and-the-pen @lilah-asteria @thisblogisaboutabook @hieragalbatorixdottir @mybestfriendmademe @paleidiot @div94 (if you are tagged by accident or want to be tagged in the future, let me know)
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“There. A letter to Tarquin and a letter to her.” Eris sent them with a flick of his wrist. 
Azriel calmed enough to sit while Eris penned the letters. They needed you to come home so they could talk with you in person. Deep down, Eris was thoroughly embarrassed over the whole situation. Not only at himself but for you leaving to another court. He wondered if this was how Tamlin felt all those years ago, when Feyre ran off to the Night Court. Eris suddenly had empathy for him in retrospect. 
He slumped back in his chair and sighed. He needed a stiff drink. But he wanted to be sober if you came home. Azriel sat across from him, arms  crossed against his chest and brows furrowed like he did when he was deep in thought. His eyes were still rimmed in red from earlier. The Shadows were nowhere in sight. 
“What?” Eris looked at his mate. 
Az cut his eyes to Eris, still frowning. “I want you to tell me exactly what you said to her.”
“I’m surprised your shadows didn’t already tell you.” Eris didn’t hold back his eye roll or his sigh. “I don’t fully remember.” 
Everything was a blur from earlier. When he got like that, he never remembered what he said. 
“Well think fucking harder.” Eris could see Azriel’s fingers dig into his sleeves. 
“She came in screaming at me about missing dinner.” It reminded him too much of his mother. The way she would yell at his father when he was a youngling. Eris tried to focus, to put that aside. “I told her the high lord meeting was more important. We were hosting, and.”
After a moment Az said, “And what, Eris”
He cursed under his breath. “I said she would understand that if she had bothered to help. Since she isn’t helping, she doesn't get to complain that we are busy. She knew what she was getting into when we mated.”
Azriel recoiled where he sat. “How could you say that to her?” 
“It’s the truth, Azriel.” Eris brushed back his hair with his hand. “This is what it’s like to be mated to a High Lord. We have responsibilities. Yes, I was wrong for implying she didn’t want to help because she asked and I told her she didn’t have to. I admit that.” 
Shadows came out as Az replied. “And we made promises we didn’t keep.”
“I know I did. It eats me alive that I broke them but what else am I supposed to do? It’s our first time hosting, I’ve only been High Lord for a decade and a half. She’s worked for multiple courts. She knows these things have to be perfect or others will talk.” 
“That doesn’t mean we can’t take a break to have dinner with her.” Az countered. 
Eris glared at him. “Do not act like you are any better. You weren’t there either.”
He winced. “You’re right. I wasn’t.” Then he glared back. “But maybe I would have been there if you let other people do their job instead of making it our problem.”
“Oh you’re going to blame me?” Eris was on his feet. “By the gods. I’m always your scapegoat because it’s easy to blame me than for you to look in a fucking mirror.”
“Eris.” A warning, as shadows built around him. 
“Am I wrong?” Azriel didn’t answer. Eris and his sharp tongue kept going. “You blamed me for centuries when it came to Mor. To this court. To my father. Let’s just add this to it.” He paused. Before he could stop himself he added. “It wouldn’t even be a fucking issue if it was just us.” 
Eris felt the shock through the bond from Az before he shut him out. Even the shadows recoiled from around Az.
“What are you saying?”
“I don’t have to repeat myself. We work well together,” he gestured between them, “because we know what to expect from each other. She wants so much more than either of us are capable of.”
Shadows shrunk back again. “That’s not true.”
“It is!” Then words spewed from his mouth like viper venom. “I wish Elain never told us. I wish I never let you get your fucking hopes up, looking for a third bond in every fucking fae you brought to our bed. But I love you, so I let you do it.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Azriel was on his own feet, siphons on his hands flashing. “I always got your consent, you said it was fine. You brought your own-”
Eris’s mouth ran away from him again. He didn’t raise his voice; his tone did the work for him. 
“Maybe I lied. I only took other lovers so you wouldn’t feel guilty. I was just trying to make you happy because I was never enough for you. Even the Mother herself knew. She knew I wasn’t enough for you so she sent us her.” 
Az looked like he’d been struck. Guilt and insecurity Eris had buried for decades laid out on full display. At that moment Eris hoped Azriel hurt just as much as he did. The silence between them was heavy and loud. It was finally Azriel who spoke, his own words sharp and stinging. 
“I never asked to be mated to you. You say this is easier for me and you, but it’s only easy for you. What’s easy is loving her. It’s not my fault you’re too fucked up to know that too.” 
Shadows grew thick around him and he winnowed out of the room. 
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
You showered and changed into a soft seafoam colored nightgown, given to you by Samira. She was sitting by a small side table reading when you came back into the bedroom. She set her book down and got up from her seat. 
“Did you tell him, Tarquin?” You asked. 
In your haste to get away, you didn’t think about the implications of your actions. Namely as High Lord’s mate seeking refuge in another court. You liked Tarquin a lot. He was kind and you were so happy when Samira and him hit it off. But he was still a High Lord of another court. Samira didn’t look you in the eyes from where she had sat on the edge of the bed. 
“I only told him what you told me.”
“That’s fine,” you said quickly. You got onto the bed and crawled up beside her. “I understand. If you hadn’t told him, I would have.”
“That said,” she put her hand over yours. “You’re here as my guest. Any correspondence will come directly to me unless there is a threat to the court.” 
You winced and she gave you a sympathetic look. Your mates were both known for their tempers. Azriel was well known for his impulsive behavior. You prayed to the Mother that neither of them acted irrationally. A hard thing to hope knowing you sealed this room the moment you entered. 
“Did you want some tea or do you want to rest for the night?” 
“Tea. I need to talk if you’re willing to listen.”
“Always,” she smiled. 
You grabbed a light robe and moved into the small sitting room. She waited as Samira had tea brought to the room. She fixed you a cup, and then she sat down and took her own in her hands. 
“So what happened?”
You let out a heavy sigh, trying to figure out where to start. 
You explained the best you could. How they both made a promise to go to dinner and neither showed. You explained how distant they’d been for months. You explained how Eris told you that dinner wasn’t as important as whatever he was working on with the upcoming summit. 
“He said I knew what I was getting into when we mated. As if I’m not managing his court while his nose is stuck in itinerary lists.” You added bitterly. 
She winced. “And Azriel? What did he say about all this?” 
“He said he was sorry. He lost track of time. Conveniently he was silent when I asked why his shadows didn’t remind him.” You stared down at the tea in your hand. You could feel your eyes water again. “He hasn’t- he has always been more physically affectionate than Eris. Out in public, at least. But he hasn’t even-“
You stopped yourself, your face burning. Samira didn’t need to know how Az hadn’t even called you by a specific pet name in weeks. Eris even longer. And how was you supposed to explain they even stopped just casually touching you? It was childish, to be upset about something so silly. Yet thinking about it just made you cry again. 
You wiped your eyes. “It just feels as if  they don’t want me anymore.”
“They're your mates, of course they want you.”
“Mates doesn’t always mean love, Samira. They did just fine without me for what? Two decades? Maybe longer. Maybe they miss it just being the two of them.” 
“Now you’re talking nonsense. Stop it,” she gave you a pointed look. 
“What if it’s the truth?” You were so sick of crying. You sniffled and wiped your eyes. “They know each other so well. What do they need me for?” 
They didn’t.
That was your whole issue. They didn’t need you. Eris and Az could practically communicate without words. They moved around each other seamlessly. Eris knew exactly how Az liked his tea. Az knew to move papers closer to the inside of the desk when Eris was on a rant, his hands moving about as he talked. Eris knew when to make the spare room without even asking Azriel if he needed it. You tried to watch, to listen. Five years and you still weren’t in tune with them. 
Samira shuffled in her seat, drawing your attention back to her. 
“Eris wrote a letter to Tarquin. I got it while you were bathing. It wasn’t much, just him requesting to know if you were here and if so, that you get this.” She held up an envelope with his seal on it. “I wrote back that I would handle communication and you’d be staying the night.” 
She laid the letter on the table in front of you. Your chest ached, begging you to open it immediately. You shoved it down. 
Samira added, “I informed him that if you want to stay longer, I can’t make you leave. Tarquin has already agreed to allow you to stay as long as you need.”
“Thank you,” you whispered and stared back down at your tea again. 
“Sleep on it. You can have breakfast with us and decide what you want to do in the morning.”
You nodded. Sleep sounded nice now that the adrenaline of the evening had crashed. You drained the rest of your tea and bid Samira good night. You left the letter on the table. You’d read it in the morning. 
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Eris poured himself the stiffest drink he’d had in decades. The shame and embarrassment of everything was still burning in his chest. He downed his drink in one swing and poured another. Both his mates were gone. He walked over to his desk where the correspondence with summer sat. Your friend had written back instead of Tarquin. He downed his second drink. 
To make things less complicated, I will be handling correspondence until this is resolved. Unless there is a threat to the court, I will not involve the high lord. I promise I will give her your letter in the morning. She was distraught when she arrived and I’ve just gotten her calmed. She’s currently bathing and I will get her some tea to help her sleep. 
There was a break in the letter and she added. 
She has yet to tell me what happened fully, but as her friend I am warning you both that you two better make this right. I will try to convince her to return in the morning, but she is a grown female. If she requests to stay, Tarquin has already told me she may. 
Eris tossed the letter back onto the desk. He doubted once you found out Az left too that you’d come home. It’s what he deserved. 
He was a fool to think he could do this- have two mates. To think he could be any better than his father. Three years mated to you and he still couldn’t control himself. Couldn’t toe the line between work and leisure. Fifteen mated to Az and he still spewed venom in his direction the moment he was cornered. And Eris finally got a taste of his own medicine when Azriel spewed it right back. 
With a heavy sigh, Eris pulled out more parchment and ink. There would not be a high lord summit- not with all of this happening. He’d draft the letters and send them in the morning. If he could sleep at all, with no one sharing his bed. He went and made a third drink. He opened his bonds and see if you or Az would respond. 
Still shut out. The urge to down that third drink was strong. He needed to be sober in the morning even if he didn’t want to be. 
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Azriel flew until his emotions settled. Eris’s foul words rung in his ears still. ‘I wish Elain never told us’ he’d said. ‘Even the mother herself knew I wasn’t enough for you so she sent her.’ 
His eyes watered and it wasn’t from the wind in them. There was an ache in his chest- both bonds were shut out. He and Eris fought plenty, before and after they reconciled and the bond snapped. Somehow this was still the worst. He ignored his own words that spewed like venom in response to what Eris had said. 
Azriel was angry and hurt. He left- if he stayed any longer the whole Forest House may have been burned to the ground. He circled the border between Autumn and Winter. He couldn't go back, not tonight. He landed in a clearing, stretching out his wings before tucking them back in. He didn’t want to go to Valeris. He had one other option. His shadows seemed to agree, as they circled him and he winnowed. 
He landed outside the wards of Rosehall. The fae lights shown through the window. 
She is awake. a shadow whispered. 
He thought about turning back. He didn’t want to disturb his mother, to bother her with his problems. Yet his feet carried him forward, the wards rippling around him. He tucked his wings in tight and walked to the door. He didn‘t have to knock; the wards were designed to let only few in and to notify her when someone arrived. He could hear the rush of footsteps inside and braced himself as the door opened. 
“Azriel?” His mother answered the door, a navy shawl you made for her wrapped tight around her shoulders, sides shaped to accommodate her wings. “What has happened?”
”I had a fight with my mates.” He said quickly. “They’re fine; I just- I couldn’t stay.”
His mother brushed back loose hair to tuck it behind her ear. He realized her hair was half braided. She nodded, and stepped aside to let him in. 
“I’m sorry, I can go.”
”Nonsense, come in. I just made tea.”
His shadows swirled past him, one or two weaving around his mother. They always loved her; probably more than him if he was honest. He stepped through the frame and looked around. He had visited two weeks ago and already things had changed. His heart skipped, looking into the sitting room. Feyre had taken to decorating his mother’s house with portraits and paintings. The one above the fireplace was of him and his mother. It was a new one on the wall to the left that wasn’t there two weeks ago that made him stop in his tracks. It was of his mother, himself, you, and Eris. From your mating ceremony, based on the clothing and how close together you all were. 
“The High Lady spoils me,” his mother said from his right. “Says my house is too empty. You should see the garden painting she had mounted in the hall a few days ago. Come.” 
He felt her hand grab his own. He could only grip back loosely. He didn’t realize how cold his fingers had gotten from flying. If she noticed, she didn’t say. She led him to the kitchen where a kettle sat on the stove. He sat at the small table and watched almost numbly while she gathered cups and poured the tea. 
“Zemër, tell me what happened.” 
Az looked down at the cup as she sat it in front of him. He wrapped his hands around it, letting the warmth ease the stiffness in his hands. If he was home, Eris would do it for him. He pushed that thought away. He took a few sips, relishing in how the warmth flowed through his chest. His mother waited patiently across from him, braiding the rest of her hair for bed. 
“I said some things I shouldn’t have.” His shadows nudged him on the shoulder. “I made a promise and didn’t keep it.” She hummed and tied off her hair. His voice cracked a little when he added. “I don’t know if I can fix it.” 
There was a beat of silence and his mother took a sip of her tea. “Why do you think such a thing?” 
“Because she left!” He snapped. His mother flinched and shadows hissed at him for raising his voice. “I’m sorry. She left and he- we’ve been so busy and she asked for one dinner and neither of us went. Then she left. And Eris said things. So I said things back.”  
He hated that hot tears fell down his cheeks. And that his mother was looking at him with pity. She reached over and took his hand, holding it tightly in her own. 
“Words are painful weapons and you are the best warrior in all prythian.” That made Azriel snort and she smiled softly. “This is a fight. Not a war. You haven’t lost yet. They are your mates. You love them. If you haven’t given up your love for them, what makes you think they have so easily given up their love for you?” 
She had him there. He gave her hand a squeeze, a gesture of thanks. Then a shadow swirled up his arm quickly. 
We must go. He furrowed his brows. He walks to our balcony. We must stop him. We must go. Go. 
“Shit.” Azriel winced at himself. He hated cursing in front of his mother. “Mama, I have to go. Thank you. For the tea.” 
She watched him stand, not letting go of his hand. “Be careful, my love.” 
Despite the tugging of the shadows he gave his mother a kiss on the forehead. “I’ll see you in two weeks. I promise.” 
She nodded and he winnowed away. 
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
At some point, Eris wasn’t sure when; he grabbed the whole bottle instead of pouring himself a glass. He couldn’t sleep. Not alone, with his thoughts and past memories hovering around the edges of the bed. They we’re waiting in the dark to grip him when he was most vulnerable. So instead he drank. Drank to numb the emptiness like he used to in the days before. 
One minute he was in his chambers and the next he was stumbling up stairs. There were several balconies in the forest house but there was only one nearest to the roof. He built it for Azriel. It had no railings, just a place for him to take off when he went flying. Az swore he didn’t need it; but he still used it. In Eris’s mind, Az would use the balcony when he came back home.
Because he had to come home. You both had to come home. Eris didn’t think he could bear it if you didn’t. It took him a moment when he reached the door to focus enough to grab the handle. Gods, he hadn’t been this drunk since his youth. Pushing into the room, it was bare- save the single old couch, rug, and unlit fireplace. His gaze fixated on the double glass doors that led to the balcony. If he could just get out there, he could wait. 
“Where do you think you’re going?”
Eris nearly fell over, balance upended by Az’s voice behind him. He grabbed Eris by his shirt to pull him steady. Shadows that had been absent swirled in his vision, grazing his hair and neck as if checking him over. It took a moment for the world to stop spinning and his focus fixated on the male before him. 
“You came back,” Eris whispered. 
“Of course I did.” Azriel’s nose crinkled at Eris’ breath. “You're drunk.”
“Can’t sleep.” He felt his eyes water. He reached for Azriel’s shoulder but Az held him in place. “I’m sorry. I'm so sorry.” 
“Look at me,” Az’s hands were cold as they cradled Eris’ face, forcing him to look him in the eyes. “I’m sorry too.”
“Your hands are cold.” He muttered, his own reaching up to cover them. He wasn’t sober enough to focus his magic like he wanted to. 
“They are.” Az gave him a soft smile. “I’ll live.” 
Eris frowned. “Why did you come back?” 
To Azriel’s credit, he didn’t seem shocked at the question. 
“I came back because I love you.” And Azriel meant it. 
“But you said-“
“I said it’s not easy.” He paused for a moment. “It’s not easy but I choose you. I will always choose you. Because I love you.”
There was silence between them for a moment. 
“She’s not coming back.” 
Az grimaced. “Eris, it’s late. She’s safe in Summer and probably sleeping. Like we both should be.”
“But I need her here.” Eris could hardly bear it. He needed you back. He needed to apologize. “Can’t we go get her?” 
“So you want to start a war with Summer?” Az’s face was serious but there was a tilt in his voice. 
“You’re laughing at me.” Eris replied solemnly. 
“You’re drunk. It’s hard not to.” He sighed, his wings slumping and shadows buzzing about them. “Let’s go to bed and sleep this off.” 
Eris was silent but seemed to concede. Az guided him out the room and back to their chambers. He would have winnowed if Eris hadn’t been so inebriated. He really didn’t feel like cleaning up vomit. 
“You’re too good to me,” Eris muttered as they made their way down the hall. 
Az tightened his arm around him. “I could argue the same.”  
More silence passed. “Do you think she’ll come back?” 
Azriel didn’t reply. He could only hope. His shadows whispered as much as he helped Eris undress in their chamber and get him to bed. 
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
In Summer, you tossed and turned. The air was too warm even with the cool magical breeze that floated through the open windows. The bed was too small. Too empty. You finally cast a spell on your blanket and pillows, making them colder. How funny you’d gotten used to Autumn's colder climate.
The spell worked too well. You were suddenly too cold, too cold without Eris and Az’s body heat to keep you warm. Tears fell on your pillow. They were probably sleeping fine without you. Your mind went to the letter you left in the other room. You were too afraid to open it. They probably only wanted you home until after the High Lords’ meeting. Or maybe they never wanted you to come back. You pulled the blanket tight around yourself. Whatever the letter said could wait until morning. 
You sighed and tried to go to sleep. 
Part 3
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noellez-best-life23 · 1 day ago
Text
“Someone named Logan,” Sam answers after a quick glance down at the paperwork in front of him. “Do you know him?” Ok so obviously I knew he was in this because the it says it but the way I giggling so school girlish when a crush is mentioned is not right so excited to be reading this now
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A life with me isn't a life that you want for yourself. I wish you could see that I'm doing this because I care about you. I'll never be able to give you a fraction of what you deserve.” Ok but what is it with these hurt characters who won't let someone love them because they think we deserve better like let us love you
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Ok so I love the whole part where they all meet Logan calling Bucky bub Bucky staring and the reader being the keep them on task and they way Bucky was like we go this way you go that way it has me giggling so much
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“It's what HYDRA is using to conduct breeding experiments with the mutants,” Bucky answers in a strained voice. “And now we've all three been infected with it.” Uh oh oh no what could possibly happen 😉😉
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Ok so the spicy smuty part after is so hot like why can't I just have both forever and Logan's sweet little talk about how Bucky loves her
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“Bucky,” you attempt to interrupt him gently. He ignores it, needing to get this off of his chest before it eats him alive. Not me wanting to scream shut up Bucky and listen
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“I did love Logan,” you cut him off. “I'll always care about him, and I'm thankful for what he and I had. Without it, I wouldn't have found you.”
“I do,” you grin at him. “I'm sorry it took me so long to see it. I was so scared of getting hurt again that I let it blind me.” You stroke your thumb over his cheek and he can't help but melt into your touch. He thinks he's fucking dreaming. What why am I tearing up
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Ok I loved this it was so good with they spicy and that fluffy ending of the reader and Bucky this was amazing
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no one does it better
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bucky barnes x reader, past logan howlett x reader
bucky barnes x reader x logan howlett {SEX POLLEN}
word count: 8.8k
summary: sent on a mission with the man you never intended to fall for, you run into someone from your past who your heart has never been able to fully let go of.
a/n: couldn't decide who i wanted to write my next one-shot for so i thought, why not both? these men are both my weakness and this trope is my weakness so this was bound to happen at some point. also big shout-out to @embbarnes for her encouragement with this and assuring me that it isn't complete trash 🫶🏻💕
warnings/tags: 18+ mdni, smut, sex pollen therefore dubcon, fuck or die situation, mmf threesome, unprotected p in v, oral (m&f receiving), definitely some angst, love triangle elements, mainly reader's pov but there's some pov switches for bucky and logan too, dirty talk, reader is afab, no use of y/n, multiple orgasms, hints of praise kink and overstimulation, reader has telekinetic abilities but i don't focus on that much
my masterlist
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The shrill, repetitive beeping of an alarm clock startles you awake and causes you to bolt upright in the bed you'd fallen asleep in.
Not your bed, you realize as you clutch Bucky's satin sheets to your naked chest. You'd accidentally passed out in his room after your time together last night.
“Shit,” you breathe as you glance over to the digital display of the alarm clock on the bedside table, next to where Bucky begins to stir from his sleep. It's seven thirty in the morning, and you're going to be late for a meeting on an upcoming mission if you don't get back to your room and get ready ASAP.
“I'm so sorry,” you mumble as he hits the snooze button of the outdated alarm with the side of his metal hand. “I didn't mean to fall asleep.”
You withdraw from the covers, throwing your legs over the side of the mattress as you start to reach down to gather your clothes that are flung precariously on the floor next to you, when you feel his flesh hand wrap around your forearm.
You glance back at him to find him smirking up at you, sleep still written across his face.
It shouldn't be possible for anyone to look so beautiful first thing in the morning, you think.
He pulls you back down to him by your arm, only letting go when your face is close enough for him to seal his lips around yours. He kisses you slowly, lazily - not at all like the hurried, heated mess of tongue and teeth from last night.
“I'm not sorry. You're really cute when you snore, actually,” he murmurs when he pulls away.
You roll your eyes, proceeding to pick your clothes up from his floor. “I do not snore,” you retort in mock defense. You yank yesterday's tank top over your head before standing to tug on your underwear and sweatpants. “But we are both going to be late for this meeting if we don't get our asses out of bed.”
You turn to face him, your eyes raking over his still relaxed position against his pillow. He sits up, a look that you can't quite place on his face - something between dejection and disappointment. Whatever it is, you know you're the reason for it.
“It's not a big deal, you know,” he starts lightly with a small smile. You quirk an eyebrow at him. “That you slept in my bed,” he clarifies. “You technically live in this building, so I don't think we crossed any imaginary line.”
You huff a laugh under your breath, a sinking feeling in your gut at the direction that you feel this conversation is headed.
You wouldn't admit it to him because of said imaginary lines, but you enjoyed sleeping next to Bucky. He's warm, and his presence is comforting, even to your subconscious. You slept the most peacefully that you have in months last night. Normally, you toss and turn and wake up multiple times throughout the night. But after falling asleep pressed up against him, you didn't wake a single time until his alarm started blaring and you opened your eyes to the early morning sunlight streaming through the cracks in his curtains.
But you and him both know what this is, and what this isn't. And as badly as such a large part of you wants to have more than this with him, you don't know if you're ready to put your heart on the line again.
“Get dressed, Barnes,” you say as you rip his comforter away from his body with the snap of your fingers, leaving him fully exposed. The sight makes you want to crawl back into the bed with him, but you force yourself to walk towards his door, ignoring the incredulous look on his face. “I'm not going to be the one to blame when Sam bitches that we're late.”
••••••
Bucky is trying his hardest to pay attention to the case details that Sam is rambling on about, he really is.
But it's hard when his brain keeps going back to the fact that you fell asleep in his fucking bed and stayed with him the entire night. Your naked body pressed against his, your familiar scent of lavender and honey invading his senses throughout the night anytime you'd stir beside him.
When he woke up around two o'clock and realized that you had never made your way back to your own bedroom down the hall, he knew that he should wake you up and let you know that you'd fallen asleep. He knew that's what you would have wanted. But as he laid beside you, listening to the even and peaceful pattern of your breathing, he couldn't bring himself to disturb you - and selfishly, just didn't want you to leave.
You had been clear from the start - your arrangement was to be sex only. And Bucky had been fine with that, truly. He had been in agreement with you. He needed to focus on adjusting to life as a pardoned man post blip, and you needed to focus on healing from - well, he wasn't sure of the exact details. He didn't want to press you too much, but he knew that you had essentially started your life over shortly before he met you.
As happy as it made him to wake up with you beside him this morning, he rationally knew that you wouldn't let it happen again.
And that thought bothers him more than it probably should.
“We've been in communication with Charles Xavier, founder of the X-Men.” Sam’s voice draws Bucky’s attention back to the situation at hand. You sit directly across the table from him, his gaze flicking to you at the mention of your former mentor's name. Your face remains neutral, but he doesn't miss the way your posture tenses. “Upwards of a dozen mutants in their early twenties have gone missing. They have reason to believe that they are being held at a warehouse outside of Lake Placid.”
“That's horrible,” you say with a shake of your head. “So where do Bucky and I come into this?” You sound almost nervous, Bucky thinks.
“The warehouse they are being held at is a former HYDRA base,” Sam explains with a glance at Bucky. “A warehouse that was specifically used for breeding experiments back in the fifties and sixties. The X-Men would like our help with this, seeing as how we not only have someone familiar with HYDRA, but someone who has worked with their team in the past, too.”
You give a slight, curt nod. Bucky knows that you're too much of a team player to argue, but he can read you like an open book - he can tell that you have reservations about this, though he doesn't fully know why.
He has his reservations, too. As if the thought of going into a potentially active HYDRA base isn't enough to put him on edge, knowing that the two of you were going to be working with your former team that you had left years ago only adds to his apprehension.
“What's the plan, exactly?” Bucky speaks up, forcing himself to look away from you and back to Sam.
“First things first, we need to figure out precisely what we are dealing with. We need confirmation that this is in fact where the mutants are being held, and exactly how many there are. The two of you will go to the warehouse for re-con, and one of Xavier's men will be meeting you there. Once we know–”
“Who?” You interrupt, sitting up straight in your chair. “Did he say who will be joining us?”
“Someone named Logan,” Sam answers after a quick glance down at the paperwork in front of him. “Do you know him?”
You go silent, pursing your lips. Bucky and Sam both look at you expectantly as you seem to space out. Sam calls your name in question.
“Uh, yeah,” you answer, your voice an octave higher than usual. “I do - I did,” you correct quickly. “I knew him.”
Bucky's eyes narrow at your out of character response. Normally, you're witty and quick off the mark. Right now, you seem taken off guard - and kind of look like you might throw up.
Sam seems to notice your reaction, but doesn't question you any further. Instead, he awkwardly clears his throat and passes identical folders to both you and Bucky.
Bucky notices the slightest shake of your hand as you grab it off of the table.
“Here's all the information you should need for now,” Sam says. “You guys head out at noon.”
You stand up from your chair and speed walk towards the door without another word, flinging the door open without a flick of your fingers.
Sam gives Bucky a look that says “fuck if I know” before Bucky dashes out of the briefing room after you.
“Hey!” He calls, catching up to you in several long strides. He grabs you by the wrist, effectively stopping you in your tracks.
“Do you want some breakfast? I'm going to order Postmates.” You say before he can get a word out. He glances from your panic-stricken eyes down to the clammy skin of your wrist.
“Postmates?” He asks, appalled that you're asking him about breakfast right now. “What? No. I'm - are you okay?”
“I'm fine,” you raise your eyebrows with a forced looking grin. “A bit peckish, but I'm fin–”
He rolls his eyes at your stubbornness.
“Who’s Logan?” He feels you tense beneath his grasp on your hand.
“He's an X-Man,” you say with a tight shrug before pulling your hand away from his and continuing back down the hallway.
Bucky really doesn't want to pry, or force you to talk about something that is obviously a touchy subject, but he's worried. The both of you are going to have to work with the guy in a matter of hours, after all.
“Yeah, Sam just told us that much,” he continues as he walks quickly to keep up with you. “But what's the deal? I take it you don't like the guy or–?”
You're the one that comes to a halt this time.
“Logan is a good man, and I have no doubt that he'll do everything he can to help these mutants that we're looking for. That's all that matters, okay?” You say in a tone that indicates the end of the discussion.
Bucky doesn’t push the topic any further, satisfied enough with your answer despite the voice in the back of his mind that is screaming that there's more to the story than your brief explanation.
“Now, do you want a breakfast burrito or not?”
••••••
It's actually pretty pathetic that nearly three years of healing can go down the drain with a simple mention of his name.
You knew that you still cared for him. You knew that part of you always would, no matter how much time and space was between you.
But when Sam mentioned his name in that briefing room, you felt as though no time had passed at all. You were right back in your bedroom at the X-Men's headquarters, packing up your belongings to leave behind the only life that you had ever truly known.
And it wasn't because you wanted to. You didn't want to at all, really. But you'd put your heart on the line for someone who wouldn't take it, one too many times. You had accepted that you had no future there. At least not the one that you so desperately craved.
A future with Logan.
“A life with me isn't a life that you want for yourself. I wish you could see that I'm doing this because I care about you. I'll never be able to give you a fraction of what you deserve.”
You remember how he wouldn't even look you in the eye as he broke the last piece of your heart with his words. Just stared at the empty shot glass on the table in front of him.
“You're giving up your last chance to even try.”
The last words you'd said to him play on repeat in your head the entire drive to Lake Placid.
You know that Bucky can tell that something is bothering you - and by extension, you can tell that something is bothering him. He hasn't once mentioned the mission at hand or attempted to turn on the radio, instead opting to drive in a heavy, loaded silence for the first hour of the car ride to the warehouse.
You glance at his side profile from the corner of your eye. His jaw is set tightly and his face otherwise expressionless, but you've known him long enough to know what he's thinking.
“We were together,” you blurt out quickly. He turns his head to look over at you in the passenger seat, his face not revealing his thoughts. “Logan and I. We were together.”
“It's okay. You don't owe me an explanation,” he replies in a stiff voice, his gaze turning back to the road in front of you. You notice his grip on the steering wheel tightens.
“I know I don't. But you still deserve one,” you continue as you begin to inadvertently pick at your cuticles. “If the situation were reversed, and we were about to walk into this with someone that you'd been with intimately in the past, I would appreciate knowing that beforehand.”
This seems to alleviate some of the tension that he's carrying. His grip on the steering wheel slackens, and he looks back over at you with a small smile.
“Well, thank you for telling me.”
“I'm sorry that I didn't let you know when you asked about him earlier,” you continue. “I was just.. taken off guard. It's been a long time since I've seen him, or even talked about him.”
“How long were you two together?”
You weren't surprised by the question, but you still found yourself unsure of how to answer. You knew the true answer would likely lead to follow up questions - follow up questions that would sting to answer out loud.
But over the course of the months that you've been sleeping with Bucky, you've fallen for him. You didn't mean to, and you didn't want to admit it to yourself at first, but it had been a while since you had been able to deny that fact to yourself. No matter how seeing Logan again after all these years goes, it won't change your feelings for Bucky. You don't know what the future looks like for you and Bucky, but you know you owe him honesty and transparency.
“Well,” you start. “We were never really officially.. together. But we were.. involved for a year when I broke things off.” You hope that he can read between the lines of your poor excuse of an explanation.
“Oh,” he answers shortly. You can't tell if your answer made him feel better or worse about the situation. “And why did you break things off?”
You look down at your hands in your lap as you clear your throat. “We wanted different things,” you shrug. “I wanted something more serious and he felt he wasn't capable of giving that to me.”
“Wasn't capable?”
“He had his reasons,” you sigh. “I know he cared for me, he could just never.. get out of his own head long enough to allow himself happiness. I don't hold it against him. It's been years, and I've made peace with it.”
“Were you…?” He trails off, his eyes flickering between you and the road that he turns onto. According to the GPS, the warehouse is just a few miles away now.
“In love with him?” You finish for him. He looks at you expectantly.
“Yeah,” you answer honestly. “I was.”
••••••
The words I don't know why I signed up for this shit keep playing on an endless loop in Logan's brain.
Every time, the words are followed by the image of your face.
He swears he's a fucking idiot. He doesn't even know if you'll be here. The Avengers have how many members at this point, anyway? What are the odds that you'll be here, out of all of them?
And even if you do happen to be here? Then what? It's been three years since he willingly let you walk out of his life. You've made a new life for yourself, found a new job and a family with them.
He didn't think this through, and he knows that. All he can do now is remind himself to focus on the mission, and worry about the rest later.
He can't allow himself to think what if he sees you again. Not when you always deserved better, and certainly do now that he's let so much time pass without even reaching out.
There's two things he's absolutely certain about, however. One, this warehouse reeks of sewage and mothballs.
Two, it's fucking empty.
He had arrived before the Avenger’s members that he is supposed to be meeting and immediately knew that something was off. His heightened senses detected no fresh human or mutant scents, or any kind of sounds emanating from the building.
He slipped through a back stairwell door to confirm his suspicions.
Completely deserted.
“Fuckin' hell,” Logan groans to himself as he storms down a hallway, shoving every door he comes to open to make sure that HYDRA left behind no bodies.
He finds no one, dead or alive, which is both concerning and comforting. He has no idea how, but HYDRA clearly got tipped off that they were onto them and emptied the place out at a moment's notice.
He turns around the corner at the end of the long hallway, going to search for any indication of where they could possibly be transporting the mutants to next, when a voice that he hasn’t heard in years and a whiff of lavender and honey stops him in his tracks.
••••••
“We had to have just missed them. They can't possibly be too far from here. We need to find Lo–”
You come to an abrupt halt when he rounds the corner just a few feet ahead of you. Bucky stops beside you, letting you take the lead.
“Logan,” you breathe. He hasn't aged a day - he looks exactly as he did the last time that you saw him, though that comes as no surprise.
His eyes pause on the small Avengers emblem on the breast pocket of your tactical suit before trailing his gaze up to yours.
Though it feels surreal to be standing in front of him after all this time, the gravity of the situation and the fact that Bucky's arm grazes against yours from beside you helps ground you.
“It's good to see you,” he greets you with a murmur of your name. “I wish it could be under different circumstances.”
Your only response is a stiff nod as you awkwardly clear your throat and turn to the man beside you, whose harsh stare has yet to leave Logan.
“This is my partner, Bucky,” you introduce them, gesturing between the two. “Bucky, this is Logan.”
“Yeah, nice to meet you, bub,” Logan grunts after a pregnant pause. You don't miss the way Bucky's eyes narrow at him at the nickname.
“He always stare this much?” Logan asks when Bucky offers nothing in response other than a curt nod. An almost sadistic smile begins to spread across Bucky's face at Logan's remark, causing you to grab his bicep in a firm hold right as he opens his mouth to respond.
“Let’s stay focused, yeah?” You glance back and forth between the two of them. The entire situation is nerve racking enough, the last thing you need is the two of them at each other's throats. “We need to do a sweep of each level to see if there's any kind of evidence as to exactly what they’re doing and where they could be headed next.”
“Great idea,” Bucky speaks up as he puts his hand on your lower back and angles you away from Logan. “You and I will check out the east wing,” he says to you, moving you in the opposite direction by applying pressure to your back as he begins to walk away.
“And you can check out the basement,” he calls to Logan over his shoulder.
You think you hear Logan chuckle under his breath as he begins to walk towards a stairwell. Luckily, without any argument.
“Subtle,” you mumble as Bucky steers you around a corner and then drops his hold on your back. “Was that really necessary?”
“I didn’t like the way he called me bub.”
“He calls everyone bub,” you snort.
“Does he call you bub?”
“Well, no–”
“Exactly.”
You throw your hands up in surrender, not wanting this to turn into an actual argument. You and Bucky work in silence as you clear the east wing of the warehouse, checking each room for any signs of what has happened and where HYDRA could be heading with the mutants next.
You find over half a dozen small rooms with hospital style beds, each rigged with hand and ankle cuffs. Almost all of them have blood stained sheets, and you have to fight off the nausea that begins to grow in your stomach at the sights and smells.
After clearing all of the makeshift bedrooms, the two of you come to a set of large, metal double doors at the end of the hallway. There's glass paneling on each one, but they're so caked in dust and grime that it's impossible to peer through them.
“Stand back,” Bucky instructs you gently. “I'll go in first.” You take a step back, allowing him to press his frame against one of the doors. It opens with a shrill creak, revealing a large room full of surgical tables, monitors, and shelves overfilled with various vials and bottles of unknown substances.
Bucky enters the room, holding the door open for you to follow him inside.
“We should take pictures of all of this,” you start, glancing around at all of the packed shelves. Bucky lets go of the door, looking around the room with you. “I don't know what any of this shit–”
You're cut off by the sound of the metal door slamming to a harsh close behind the two of you, immediately followed by dozens of glass vials shattering against the cement floor when a wooden shelf collapses.
It all happens so fast that you don't even have time to think about using your powers to stop it.
You both jump back, distancing yourselves from the thick plumes of red and black smoke that erupt from the pile of shattered glass. The room is quickly filled with a thick stench of something akin to vinegar. You burst into a coughing fit as Bucky tugs you away from the wreckage, shielding your face to the best of his ability with his metal arm.
“That can't be fucking good,” you manage to get out in between coughs. The billows of smoke continue to grow higher, effectively blocking you and Bucky from the doorway. To get out of the room, you'd have to walk right through it.
“Maybe it'll dissipate in a sec–”
You're cut off by a sharp stabbing pain that starts in your lower belly and radiates all the way through your diaphragm and pelvis.
“Fuck!” you yelp out, clutching at your stomach. Bucky immediately lunges towards you, preventing you from completely crumpling over.
“What is it?” He asks, panic evident in his voice. “Hey, look at me, what's going–”
He can’t get the rest of his question out before he's letting out a sharp hiss, his hands moving to clutch his own stomach. “Oh, fuck,” he groans through gritted teeth.
“What was that?” You cry. Your legs suddenly feel like jelly, and before you can grab onto one of the surgical tables for support, you're falling to your knees on the hard cement floor.
Before Bucky can manage any kind of response, your head is snapping towards the entryway to the room that's concealed by the cloud of smoke. You can hear Logan calling your name from down the hallway.
“Logan!” You yell back just as another jolt of pain hits your gut. “Don't! Don't come in here!”
But just as the warning leaves your lips, Logan is slamming the double doors open and walking directly into the chemical cloud.
“Goddammit, what the hell?” He yells as he begins viciously coughing. Bucky falls to the floor next to you, his face distorted in pain.
It's as you're looking at his face - his plush pink lips and perfectly chiseled jawline - that your heart rate begins to skyrocket.
Logan emerges from the dark burgundy cloud, looking completely bewildered as he takes in the state of you and Bucky on the floor. His gaze settles on you in concern.
“Are you okay? What happened?”
“The shelf fell,” you grunt out, looking over to the smoke that's now beginning to dissipate. “A bunch of vials shattered. Whatever was in them–”
You can't finish the sentence before you're overtaken by discomfort in your groin. You look down at the zipper of your tactical suit, trying to make any sense of what is happening. It feels as if you’ve pissed yourself - your underwear is suddenly uncomfortably sticky and wet.
“What was in those vials?” Logan demands. You look up, frantically glancing between him and Bucky. Logan stumbles backwards, clutching his stomach with one hand as he leans against a surgical table for support.
“It's what HYDRA is using to conduct breeding experiments with the mutants,” Bucky answers in a strained voice. “And now we've all three been infected with it.”
••••••
Logan thinks that for the first time in two hundred years, he could actually fucking die. His lungs feel like they are collapsing within the cavity of his chest and liquid fire courses through his veins. He looks at you, doubled over in pain on the ground as Bucky crouches next to you and rubs circles on your lower back in a futile attempt to comfort you.
Logan has never considered himself to be a jealous man, but the mere sight of him touching you through your tactical suit makes his blood boil even hotter than it already was. He knows that if you had shown up here alone and the two of you found yourselves in this position, Logan would already have you bent over this table with his cock buried up to your stomach.
It's eating him alive - the drug, yes, but also the thought that you could possibly feel for Bucky what you once felt for him.
He knows he has no right to feel this way. Not when he had every opportunity to prevent you from walking away from him, and didn't take any of them. Not when you'd still be with the X-Men today, if you hadn't felt like your only chance at moving on from him was by leaving.
He knows all of this. But the drug in his system is making him really fucking irrational and possessive over someone who clearly doesn't belong to him anymore.
Doesn't belong to him and never did, he reminds himself. He has himself to thank for that.
“She's your girl, is she not?” Logan spits out through gritted teeth. “Don't let me stop you.”
He has to get out of here. He has to get somewhere far the fuck away from you before he -
“Logan, don't be ridiculous,” you groan from where you're crouched on the ground. “We are miles away from civilization. This will kill you before you can even–”
Your voice alone is enough to make his cock feel like it's going to explode.
“Kill me?” He chuckles. “You've clearly forgotten a lot about me, sweetheart.”
He turns to leave the room when Bucky's voice brings him to a halt.
“She's right. They're experimenting on mutants, you don't think they've taken regenerative powers into consideration? This shit has been reformulated to kill anyone with a beating heart.”
“What are you suggesting, huh?” Logan demands at Bucky. He doesn't know if what he is saying is true or not - he just knows that the room feels over a hundred degrees every time he looks at you and that it's a miracle he hasn't sliced this Bucky's guy's neck to get you alone yet. “If that's true, there's only one way out of this. For all of us. Something tells me you won't be okay with that.”
If the way that Bucky glared at him when they first met didn't tell him enough, the pheromones that practically radiated off of him certainly did. He may not know the intimate details of your and Bucky's relationship, but one thing is plain as day - the man is in love with you, and Logan can't blame him for it.
Bucky forces himself up into a standing position, you still slumped on the floor by his feet. He takes a step toward Logan, allowing Logan to see the sweat that drips down his forehead and his dilated pupils.
“Okay with it?” Bucky chuckles grimly. “Of course I'm not okay with it. The thought of you touching her makes me want to choke the life out of you myself, but the thought of you dying and causing her even more pain? I'm even less okay with that.”
“No one is dying,” you exclaim from beneath them, looking up at both of them with bloodshot eyes. “We're going to do what it takes to make it through this. Okay? All of us.”
••••••
There wasn't enough time to overthink it. If there was, this wouldn't be happening.
You were acting on pure instincts - instincts that were screaming at you to keep them both, and yourself, alive.
There's a tiny, faint voice in the back of your mind that reminds you of all of the potential consequences of this - of what the aftermath of this will be like. But then there's a louder, more dominating voice that overpowers it, telling you to give into this drug and save yourself, save Logan, save Bucky.
Bucky hauls you up to your feet, pulling you off the cement flooring by the tops of your arms.
“You sure about this?” He asks lowly, walking you backwards until the backs of your thighs come in contact with a surgical table. It amazes you - how he's somehow able to still be so considerate of you when this drug is ravaging his body, too.
You look back and forth between him and Logan, both of them doing their best to conceal the considerable pain that they're in.
You suddenly find it hard to care about how fucked of a situation that you're in. Not when all you want is to feel them, touch them, taste them both.
Logan walks over to the two of you in two long strides. You perch on the ledge of the surgical table, Bucky and Logan standing side by side in front of you, trapping you between them and the bed. Their scents are overwhelming - Bucky's piney aftershave and Logan's faint musk of old tobacco.
“Order me away,” Logan murmurs breathlessly. “Tell me to leave right now, and I will, even if it kills me.”
“No,” you practically bark at Logan, tugging him down by the tactical vest until his face is just inches from yours. “I am sure about this,” you implore. You drop your hold on his vest, bringing your hand to the zipper at the top of your own tactical suit and ripping it downwards, exposing your stomach and your lace clad breasts. You push the stretchy material away from your shoulders and down your arms, leaving yourself exposed from the waist up with the exception of your bra.
In any other scenario, you would have felt insecure about being so exposed in front of the both of them. But right now, with the drug spurring you on and the way that both of their eyes rake over your figure, it's an empowering high.
“Lay down,” Bucky instructs you gently, restraint in his voice. “Gotta get you out of this suit so we can take care of you.”
You don't hesitate to do as he asks, scooting backwards onto thin foam padding of the surgical table and laying down on your back. Bucky follows your lead, caging you to the bed with his metal arm as he hovers above you on the poor excuse of a mattress. He rips the thin lace material of your bralette away from your breast, immediately attaching his mouth to your nipple. You hiss, arching into the sensation.
Logan stands at the end of the bed, making quick work of shedding you of your boots before shimmying your tactical suit and your panties the rest of the way down your body. He groans at the sight of your exposed, wet cunt.
Bucky pulls away and you whimper at the loss of contact. He grins up at you, and then looks down at where Logan is now kneeling at the bottom of the table. He splays his large hands on your inner thighs, spreading your legs apart.
“Go for it,” Bucky encourages him. “It's only fair. I had her just last night, after all.”
The possessive edge to his voice with the not so subtle reminder of who gets to fuck you now sends a fresh wave of arousal through you, making your pussy clench.
Logan growls at his words - there's no better word for the sound. Deep, dark and guttural, he growls before lowering his mouth to your wet heat.
There's an instantaneous relief wash over you as his tongue licks a thick strip from your hole and up to your clit. He moans into you as you lock your thighs around either side of his head, the scruff of his beard tickling your skin.
You pull Bucky down to you, crushing your lips against his. He brings his flesh hand to your exposed breast again, palming and pinching your nipple between his thumb and index finger.
You feel drunk off of the way that both of their tongues explore you - Bucky's mingling with your own and Logan's lapping at your pussy. You snake your hands between your and Bucky's bodies, cupping his evident bulge in your palm through his tactical pants. He thrusts his hips into your touch, but you know it’s not enough to provide him any kind of relief. Your fingers fumble with the buttons and zipper of his pants until you’re able to free his cock. You stroke him in one hand, smearing the pre-cum around his tip up and down his length. His forehead rests against yours as his eyes roll back into his head.
With your other hand, you reach down to where Logan is nestled between your thighs and lace your fingers between the tufts of his hair. It’s all so strangely familiar - the feeling of Bucky twitching in your palm and Logan’s lips locked around your clit.
Despite the time that's passed since the last time he's touched you, Logan still knows your body like the back of his hand. He knows you're close when you start bucking your hips against his mouth, chasing your release with the friction. He brings a calloused finger to the base of your cunt, circling the tip of it in the excess of your juices before slipping it into you with ease. He quickly adds a second, dragging the digits along the velvet walls of your cunt. Bucky captures your lips in his once more as you pump him rapidly in your hand and you feel the coil in your belly heat and tighten when he slips his tongue inside your mouth.
You cum with a cry that gets lost in Bucky's mouth, Logan working you through your orgasm with his tongue and fingers until you've stopped writhing against his face.
“She makes the prettiest sounds when she's fucked out of her mind, doesn't she?” Logan slurs as he sits up on his knees and begins to unbutton his pants. His lips and beard glisten with your slick.
“Tell me about it,” Bucky agrees, pulling himself out of your hand. He helps you into a sitting position and then cups your jawline in both of his face, forcing you to look up at him.
“Which one of us do you want first, huh?”
Drunk off of their words in your post-orgasm haze, all you can do is shake your head. You know either one of them would fill you up just right, alleviating the still present ache in your gut.
“Come on, sweetheart,” Logan purrs as he yanks his pants and boxers down to his knees with one hand and pumps his length in the other. “Gotta tell us what you want. You're the one calling the shots here.”
It's the way that they're both looking at you like they'd do anything you asked of them that gives you the courage to take control of the situation.
“Come up here,” you instruct Logan. Bucky hops off of the bed, giving you space to maneuver yourself onto your hands and knees. Logan crawls around you, until his cock is directly in front of your face.
Bucky takes it upon himself to take Logan's prior position at the base of the bed, stroking himself in his hand as he lines himself up at your entrance. He teases your hole for a moment, unable to hold back any longer as he sinks his length into you. You gasp at the fullness of it, instantly rocking back against him as he digs both his metal and flesh fingers into the meat of your hips.
Logan fists his cock, the tip glistening just inches in front of your mouth. You stick out your tongue, licking up the beads of pre-cum that drip down the head. He curses under his breath, nudging your lips apart with the tip. His eyes flutter closed as you take him in your mouth, inch by inch until he hits the back of your throat. Behind you, Bucky works up to a brutal pace that has you moaning around Logan's cock in your mouth.
“You look so pretty like this,” Logan praises from above you as he cradles your head in his hands, keeping you right where he wants you. “Always been so pretty. You know that?”
You bob your head along his length, bringing one hand to massage the base of his shaft.
It's all overwhelming - the angle that Bucky is hitting your cervix over and over again, and the lack of oxygen from Logan completely filling your mouth and throat.
“So fucking tight, too,” Bucky coos as he loops his arm around your midsection, bringing his flesh fingers to rub your clit. Logan begins to piston his hips back and forth, making you gag each time he rams against the back of your throat. The lack of air has your cheeks stained with a steady stream of tears. “Taking both of us so well. Fuck, ‘m gonna cum.”
His words send you over the edge, a second orgasm washing over you. You pull yourself off of Logan’s dick, all but going limp on the shitty foam mattress beneath you as Bucky spills into you from behind. Logan keeps a firm grasp on your shoulders, helping to keep you upright as you come down for your climax.
As you try to regulate your breathing, you’re overcome with relief at knowing that Bucky’s going to be okay - and relief at the absence of searing pain in your own gut when Bucky pulls out of you. Relief that is short-lived when you look up to see that Logan’s face is still contorted in pain.
“Lay down,” you instruct him breathlessly. “I’ll take care of you.”
Instead of doing as you ask, he pulls you up to him by the tops of your arms and melds his lips to yours. It hits you that although his cock was just down your throat, this is the first time that the two of you have kissed in years. He tastes exactly as you remember - there’s always an underlying hint of sweet tobacco and bourbon.
Despite the urgency of the situation, he takes his time kissing you. He’s almost hesitant at first, sweeping his tongue along your bottom lip as if asking for permission before slipping it inside your mouth. You're vaguely aware of the sound of the metal doors creaking open and then clicking closed in the background.
It's over as quickly as it begins. When he pulls away, he's looking down at you, the pain that he's in no longer visibly displayed on his features. As if your kiss alone was a balm.
“I had to do that, just once. Just one more time.”
And with that he maneuvers himself so that he's laying flat against the surgical table, pulling you across him so that your thighs straddle either side of his hips. You glance around the room, realizing that Bucky is nowhere to be seen.
You can't say that you blame him - with the drugs dissipating from his system now that he's had his release, of course he wouldn't want to stick around for what's to come.
What did you expect him to do, stand to the sidelines and watch? Still, a wave of panic washes over you at not knowing where he's at - physically or mentally.
“I'll make this quick, sweetheart,” Logan murmurs from beneath you, noticing your distraction. “This will all be over soon.”
This draws your attention back to him, and panic is replaced with guilt - guilt that he still has these chemicals making every fiber of his being undoubtedly feel like he's on fire, while you now feel okay.
“Don't worry about me,” you tell him, cradling his jaw in the palm of your hand from above him. You lean forward on your knees, using your other hand to align his erection with your entrance. You sink yourself onto him in one swift motion, gasping at the stretch of his girth. “Just focus on yourself,” you whisper through the burn.
You give yourself a brief moment to adjust to the angle before rocking forward, pulling out almost completely before sinking back down. His facial features visibly relax at your movements, your walls fluttering around his length and alleviating all of his discomfort.
“That's it,” he encourages as you pick up your pace. “Just like that.” His large hands come to grip your hips, helping to move you up and down. He thrusts up, meeting each of your movements with his own. “Feel just as perfect as you always have.”
You can tell he's close when the movements of his hips grow sloppy and his breathing becomes erratic. One, two, three more harsh thrusts and he's spilling into you - his brows furrowed together and his teeth dug into his bottom lip hard enough to draw blood if it weren't for the fact that the indentations heal as quickly as they appear.
You let out an audible sigh of relief as you pull yourself off of him, a mixture of both his and Bucky's cum leaking down your inner thighs.
You're okay. Logan's okay. Bucky's okay. Okay being a relative term, of course. But you were all three going to live.
You sit on the edge of the table as Logan stands up and tucks himself back into his pants. He grabs your underwear and tactical suit from where they'd been discarded on the floor and hands them to you.
“You okay?” He asks hesitantly.
“Yeah,” you answer as you slide your panties up your thighs. He looks away, wanting to give you the privacy to dress yourself now that you're no longer under the influence of the drugs. “Yeah, I think so. Are you?”
“Feeling a lot better than I was just five minutes ago.”
The two of you fall into a heavy silence as you proceed to put on your clothing and boots. Logan pulls out a cigar and a lighter from one of the interior pockets of his vest and lights it up. You can't help but laugh under your breath - some things never change.
“Listen,” Logan starts as he exhales a puff of a smoke. “I know this wasn't anyone's fault and we all did what we had to do, but I'm sorry if this causes any issues between you and your boyfriend.”
“You don't need to be sorry,” you assure him. “And he's not my boyfriend,” you add in a smaller voice.
“Could have fooled me,” Logan huffs with another inhale of his cigar. “Practically smelled it on him the second that I saw the two of you together.”
“Smelled it on him?”
Logan takes a step closer to you, narrowing his eyes at you.
“Sweetheart, that man loves you. A blind man could see it.”
A lump forms in your throat as you take in his words. Could they be true? Could Bucky really love you? You weren't naive enough to think that he feels nothing for you - you've always known that he cares for you.
Maybe, just maybe it's possible - possible that you have spent so much time and effort keeping your walls up that you were blind to the fact that he could be in love with you.
“Look, I'm not trying to overstep here,” Logan continues when you don't respond. “I just want you to be happy. That's all I've ever wanted for you. Just don't make the same mistakes that I did, yeah? If you love the guy, tell him.”
You jump down from the edge of the table, coming to stand directly in front of Logan. Sincerity flickers in his hazel eyes - hazel eyes that you used to be in love with and will always have love for.
But it's different now. You know it, and he does too.
You raise up on the tips of your toes and plant a small kiss near the corner of his mouth.
“Thank you, Logan,” you murmur. “Take care of yourself.”
••••••
The two hour long car ride back to the compound feels eternal despite the fact that Bucky drives a steady fifteen miles an hour over the speed limit the entire time.
After you ran out of the warehouse looking for him, Bucky was quick to make sure that you were okay. After being assured that you were physically fine, he wasted no time in ushering you back to the vehicle and getting the fuck out of Lake Placid.
He knew that you and him would have to have a conversation. He knew that you were itching to bring it up - could tell that you were nervous by the way that you dug your nails into the palm of your hands and repeatedly cracked your knuckles throughout the drive back home.
But he wasn't ready to hear it. He wasn't ready to hear how seeing Logan after all of this time brought up so many feelings that you thought were buried. He wasn't ready to hear how kissing him again made you realize that you couldn't kiss him anymore.
He wasn't ready to accept the fact that the last time he got to fuck you, he had to share you with the man that you'd undoubtedly be going back to.
So when he sees you part your lips to speak from his peripheral vision, he pretends he doesn't notice and quickly turns up the volume to the radio, blaring some shitty early 2000's pop song that sounds like nails on a chalkboard to him.
Anything sounds better than the words that he dreads coming from your mouth.
As soon as the two of you arrive back to the compound, you're both whisked in different directions for medical exams and separate debriefings on what happened during the mission.
By the time he's finished getting the third degree from Sam, and has given a blood sample so that the research team can study the drug that the three of you had been exposed to, he's ready to sleep for a solid twenty-four hours.
But he knows he won't be able to fall asleep with the ten pound brick that sits in the pit of his stomach at the thought of how the next conversation between you and him is bound to go.
He's walking back to his room, practically dragging his feet, when he walks by your door - it's slightly ajar, and light creeps into the otherwise dark hallway from the opening. He pauses to listen, hearing only the soft shuffle of your slippers on your rug and the low volume of your TV, undoubtedly playing one of your comfort shows.
He takes a deep breath before giving a soft knock to your bedroom door. He hears your footsteps approach the door, his heart sinking to his stomach before you can even open it.
“Bucky,” you breathe. He relaxes the slightest bit at the fact that you sound relieved to see him. “Come in,” you tell him as you open the door wider for him.
He enters the familiar, comforting space of your bedroom. You've lit several tea light candles throughout the small space, and he sees that his assumption about your comfort show playing is correct.
“I was going to come check on you in a little bit,” you tell him as you sit down next to him. “Are you okay?” You ask him gently.
He gulps, not knowing where to begin.
“I'm alright, all things considered,” he offers with a forced smile. “Listen,” he continues, suddenly unable to hold your gaze. His eyes flitter around your room, as if he's trying to memorize all of the little details. “I know you're probably exhausted, but I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry for what happened today. I'm sure that it was harder on you than it was on either of us. I know you loved him, and I get it if you still do and don't want to continue this now. I wouldn't blame you if you went back–”
“Bucky,” you attempt to interrupt him gently. He ignores it, needing to get this off of his chest before it eats him alive.
“--back to him. But I just need you to know that this doesn't change anything for me. We did what we had to do for us all to make it out of that alive, but I don't want anything to change between you and I. I hope we can.. go back to normal.”
He finally looks back to you once he finishes rambling.
“I don't want things to go back to normal for us.”
He assumed that's what was coming, but it doesn't make it sting any less. He clears his throat, and starts to push himself off of your bed when you grab his hand.
“I don't want things to go back to normal for us because I'm in love with you, Bucky.”
You close the small amount of space between the two of you, cupping his head in your hands and pulling his face to yours. You slate your lips over his and before he can even process what you've said, he's wrapping his arms around your back and pulling you onto his lap.
Because I'm in love with you, Bucky replays on repeat in his head as he kisses you until you're breathless above him.
“You love me? But - Logan - what about–” He stutters out as he stares up at you.
“I did love Logan,” you cut him off. “I'll always care about him, and I'm thankful for what he and I had. Without it, I wouldn't have found you.”
“You love me,” he states in disbelief.
“I do,” you grin at him. “I'm sorry it took me so long to see it. I was so scared of getting hurt again that I let it blind me.” You stroke your thumb over his cheek and he can't help but melt into your touch. He thinks he's fucking dreaming.
You love him. It sounds too good to be true. But he knows you too well enough to know that you wouldn't say it if you didn't mean it.
He can see it in your eyes, just how true it is.
“I love you,” he breathes before bringing his lips to yours once more. He kisses you like it's the first time he ever has - takes his time exploring your mouth with his, he nips and sucks on the swell of your bottom lip with his teeth.
You break the kiss, a playful smile blooming on your face.
“I was about to hop in the shower when you knocked. Would you want to take one with me?”
He can't help but return the smile. “You're inviting me to shower with you? Next thing I know you're going to be falling asleep in my bed on purpose.”
You snap your fingers, and Bucky hears the water from your shower begin to beat down on the floor of the tub.
“Oh, you're sleeping in my bed tonight, if that wasn't obvious.”
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DISCLAIMER i promise i love logan howlett with my whole heart!!! ❤️ i don't normally write angst so i wanted to try something a bit out of my comfort zone. it's been a little while since i've written for bucky so that motivated me to gear this story more towards him, but there's plenty of happy logan pieces on my masterlist 🫶🏻💕
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bonesandthebees · 13 hours ago
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im confused sorry but why is everyone celebrating tommy, jack, and phil talking about dream that way?? im seeing a lot of mixed sides on them talking about this so im so sorry if you cant answer
oh boy anon uh. this is a bit like opening pandora's box ngl.
I don't know how much context to give but basically a very very pared down version is: back when the dsmp was in its heyday with cctommy being, yknow, 16 years old, there were some instances of interactions he and dream had that seemed off in certain ways, but given that us fans only saw the public thing + general fandom opinion of dream being very different at that time we generally tended to believe that the interactions were joking and friendly on all sides
over the years, as we've come to learn more about the person dream really is a lot of fans have looked back on these somewhat strange interactions with a more critical eye. specifically with the podcast clip I reblogged, tommy, jack, and phil were referring to a twitter interaction dream and tommy had back in 2021. tommy had made a dumb joke about dream, dream replied basically saying he made tommy's career and that tommy owed his success to him and even posted graphs of sub counts and stuff to prove his point?? I don't remember exactly what the reply was but it was along those lines and was strangely aggressive for an obvious joke tommy was making. so phil replied to dream with his own tweet basically saying "imagine taking credit for another creator's success because you helped guide them a bit" which was such an eloquent and simple takedown that the tweet has achieved somewhat legendary status in the fanbase lol
so yeah, in the podcast tommy, jack, and phil were talking about the behind the scenes of that whole thing basically revealing what most of us figured: tommy was joking and dream took it way too seriously and got aggressive publicly on twitter with someone who was ostensibly his friend, who he could've just dmed to clear things up. the reason phil jumped in is because tommy had dmed him at the time asking phil to help because he wasn't sure if dream was trying to joke as well or if he was genuinely pissed at him.
also on this podcast (which is a bonus episode only technically available on their paid patreon) tommy, jack, and phil all talked pretty openly about their true feelings regarding dream during that time and also now. basically, what phil and jack were both saying was there were a lot of red flags with dream's behavior back then with the way he treated the people around him. it's basically very cathartic for a lot of the fanbase to hear about this because we've all suspected for a long time there was a lot more animosity between cc's behind the scenes, especially after that spilled over to dream's public behavior on twitter.
sorry if that's not exactly coherent I am tired but I hope that explains things a bit
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gyeomsweetgyeom · 17 hours ago
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[8:09 pm]
(cw: f!reader)
The car rumbled down the street, a cold silence filled the car. You started out the passenger window while husband!Renjun looked at you from the corner of his eye.
It had been a rough afternoon for the two of you. Renjun failed to tell you about a huge gala he had for work that night even though you had already both agreed to celebrate your wedding anniversary tonight. Your anniversary celebration that had already rescheduled since Renjun would be out of town. You knew this wasn’t his fault exactly, he couldn’t control when he had to leave for work but the idea of spending your first wedding anniversary alone didn’t feel nice.
The gala though, that was his fault entirely. He swore he told you but there were no texts, emails, and nothing in the calendar you both kept up to date. Not to mention that he had told you it was black tie with only 3 hours until he had to be there.
You had wasted half an hour of that time arguing, another hour and a half getting ready and the last hour walking around department stores and boutiques looking for a dress that fit the dress code. And Renjun had been a major pain in your ass the entire time!
He would excitedly tell you found something and when you turned he would be holding a bright, gaudy dress with entirely too many ruffles. He did that countless times and each time you fell for it. You were already annoyed that he had waited until the last second, annoyed that the reservations you had planned were now useless, and annoyed that you had to spend your honorary wedding anniversary shmoozing Renjun’s coworkers.
He tried to make you laugh, tried to compliment you, talk to you like everything was ok but you wouldn’t budge! He sighed, fingers tapping at the steering wheel nervously, “you really do look beautiful. That dress fits you perfectly.”
You huffed like a grumpy child, “no, it doesn’t. It’s too long and the chest is too big.”
“Well, I can’t tell, you look gorgeous.”
“Another thing you don’t pay attention to,” you murmur under your breath.
Renjun sighs, pulling into the front of the venue and sliding out of the car to give the keys to the valet. The valet gets to your door before he can, but he can feel his nerves calm when you hook your arm through his. He tried to help you fix the skirt of your dress but you swatted his hands away.
He groaned under his breath, fine, if you wanted to be petty, he could be even more petty. He knew he messed up, but geez woman! How many time were you going to make him apologize?!
He straightened out his bow tie and entered the venue with you on his arm. He smiled at one of his bosses and walked over, “Mr. Lim! So good to see you again! I don’t know if you remember but this is my darling wife.” His hand squeezed your waist as he drawled out the word “darling.” You smiled and introduced yourself to the older man, standing by as the ever interested wife as they both made small talk.
Every introduction that followed was the same. You were Renjun’s beloved wife, his dear wife, his sweet wife, the wife he adored and with every introduction you felt the genuine disappointment from earlier melt into mild, playful annoyance.
After Renjun had had enough of introductions and led the two of you to your seats you finally took the bait. “I know what you’re doing Mr. Huang, just because you describe me with all these cute little adjectives doesn’t mean you’re forgiven.”
Renjun hides a smile from behind the rim of his glass, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Oh! This is my precious wife who I love with my whole heart and soul, do you remember her?” You mimic in a low growl.
Renjun laughs brightly, “I don’t sound like that! And I didn’t gush about you like that.”
“You basically did. Now everyone here knows who wears the pants in this marriage.”
Renjun grabs your hands and waits for you to look at him. When you do you find his gaze soft and apologetic, “I really am sorry. It completely slipped my mind and in the future I will absolutely stay on top of keeping you informed. Can you find it in that big, beautiful heart of yours to forgive me?”
You fiddled with the wedding band on his ring finger, “I’m more annoyed that you kept pulling hideous dresses when we didn’t have a lot of time to get here.”
“I will never, and I mean never, give you fake fashion advice again.”
“Well, I’m sorry for throwing a fit about it too. I accept your apology, my favorite husband.”
“Hey! I’m your only husband. Forever.”
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bloobydabloob · 2 days ago
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How did you go about developing your style and how long did it take you? I love everything about your art style and the composition and colors, it’s all very visually appealing and flows rly nicely :)
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Thank you. Random unrelated Dirk doodle I never posted for picture. Heed the cut for info.
I may repeat myself here because I don’t reread my own posts and immediately forget everything I’ve said before on here but I’m not really sure “how long it took me” to be honest because I am not sure how to quantify that. I think I could go on for a lot longer than I did but I’m absolutely exhausted so please excuse any stupid writing.
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Thank you for reading sorry if it is not helpful, ask me for clarification if something makes no sense. Here is drawing of myself I did today. Good day and “TLDR” : I developed my style by getting older and drawing and thinking a lot. Tanks
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lamentationsofalonelypotato · 13 hours ago
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@zepskies
Oh goodness I am so excited to finally being able to read part two!
Alright it is devastating right off the bat and I know, I know I should be worried about her and I am. I am SO worried, but my mind completely went somewhere else when Dean PICKED HER UP. The man is so strong and I am just...
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“I hope you’ve learned your damn lesson,” he says.  Your gaze snaps up to his. “Excuse me?” Dean’s hands go to his hips as his brows raise at you.  “Next time, when I tell you to hang back, I mean that shit. Hang the hell back,” he all but growls. 
I was prepared for this coming but dang... "I hope you've learned your damn lesson" is a line that breaks my heart more than I should. It cuts to the quick for me, because to me it's worse than just saying "I told you not to do something." It's not heartless, but it's enough of a rendition of it that it just makes you go "oh wow."
And oh my word the two lines from Dean when she got mad KILLED ME. The:
"What's this, some kind of Latina temper?" he asks snidely.
AND
"Oh, I'm sorry, does this telenovela-style tongue lashing come with subtitles?" he snarks.
I was literally screaming. It's like he wants her to kill him. I know that Dean loves her so much but oh my goodness it's about to get so real for him. Man is about to be torn to shreds.
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You wear it over some long pajama pants instead of your usual shorts, or better yet, nothing at all. But he can see what kind of mood you’re in. Things are unsettled as you both get ready for bed in silence.  He notes the way you turn to face the other side in bed, maybe to avoid him. Though if you really wanted to do that, you could’ve gone to your old room. So in more ways than one, Dean takes some solace in the fact that you’re still next to him. And he decides to give you some time and space.  He goes to bed and tries in vain to sleep.
Oh sweetie pie, Dean you're an idiot, but we love our little idiot even when he loses his temper because he cares so much. This part really got to me, because at first I was like "oh why would she stay with him in his room," but I get it. Even though she's upset, Dean is still her best friend and the man she loves and even though he's the one that made her feel this way, she still wants to be comforted by his presence. I always think that, this particular thing is so bittersweet to read about in relationships.
Or at least that's how I took this bit 😅.
Side note: I am happy that the reader didn't have to tell the woman about her son. That would have broken me to read that especially after the reader promised that they would find her son in part one.
It startles a shriek of surprise out of you as you whirl around. Dean’s smile hikes up into a grin, but it soon fades when he remembers the way your scream rang through his ears last night. The way his heart dropped into his stomach, and his head swiveled at the sound. And he saw you go down hard.  Then the rest of it tumbles through his mind—what he had to do afterwards in order to save you. How he’d did it without really thinking, his panic and determination blocking out almost everything else when he’d grabbed the kid. The monster, he forcibly reminds himself. 
Oh my word. I love you friend, but WHY!? Dang it, this pricked at my heart. It's so good, so heart wrenching. I feel so bad for him, but it really just reinforces why he "lost it" with the reader earlier. Goodness the trope of the reader getting yelled at by someone who loves them about putting themselves in danger really is just such a good one for Dean and you do it so well.
His apology is really just pricking at my heart. It's so good, so forthcoming so honest. And the thought that he was "better off alone" is so on brand for him. I know that we've talked about that before, but it really does fit him, and I love how you weave it into this fic.
You realize then what Dean’s really saying. He’s afraid…afraid to lose you. You see it in his furrowed brows, the downturn of his lips, and whatever pain he’s trying to hide in the depths of his eyes.  And just like that, the water works start. You can’t quite keep your tears at bay as you hold onto his shirt. He lets out a resigned sigh as he holds you by your arms.  “You don’t have to cry for that,” he says, a bit teasing.  “Have you met me?” you sniff. But you manage to look up at him with your glassy eyes. “I’m sorry too. God, I’m so sorry, Dean.” 
She's crying... I'm crying. It's really just tears all around and such a good moment. Also the him saying "You don't have to cry for that"... YES SHE DOES.
This is just overall a really wonderful vulnerable moment that you've captured that feels real for both the reader and Dean. Especially when she talks about "working with my heart, not my head." I think that if it were me, I would also be "working with my heart." I don't think that I'd be able to take myself emotionally out of the situation that they're in all the time because they're hunters.
The problem is, you didn’t just see your own mother in Rachel. She hadn’t been much older than you. And when you imagine a life beyond hunting, more than anything (no matter how much you shove down the idea), you really do want a family of your own someday. 
Hoping for some FORESHADOWING 🙏🏻👀
Also the salsa lesson is just so cute. And the way you took a really emotional moment to a cute salsa dance to a steamy session to a giggly awkward moment is great. The transitions make it seamless.
And the song choices were perfect! When the reader was describing what the song meant I was like, "oh yeah, that's him right there. There's the man officer." lmao 🤣
Often he’s one to leave love bites of varying degrees, wherever he sees fit. But for a moment he stops at the crook of your neck, just pressing a lingering kiss. He lets out a deep breath, and you realize he’s probably thinking about where you were bitten. The wound is gone, but it doesn’t change what’s imprinted in both of your minds.   A softer smile grows on your face. You trail your fingers up into his hair, massaging the back of his neck.  “I’m okay,” you remind him. Dean hums deep in agreement. You know, however, that he’s still thinking far too much.
I was again so emotional reading this, because oh my word, poor Dean just reliving the moments where the reader almost died.
And also the final scene 👀🌶️ I should have known from the gif at the beginning tbh lol.
ESPECIALLY THIS LINE:
“What, now you’re shy?” he remarks. And he has to laugh. “Come back here.”
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I don't know why that wiped me out after everything tbh.
Not to mention that the sex was also giggly towards the end and I really just love that. And the love confessions KNOCKED ME OUT.
I love you, you’d said. I love you and I love you, more than you can believe and understand. 
Oh I'm riding a train of emotions, and all of this was so good. Especially Sam walking in on them. I was laughing so hard at Dean's reaction:
“All right, Sammy. Go to your room,” he chides playfully (but he means it). “The adults are havin’ a moment.”
It's all wonderful my friend! And I can't wait to read another fic from this universe! 😊
Devour Me - Part 2
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Pairing: Dean Winchester x Plus-Sized/Latina!Reader 
Summary: When you and Dean start to press each other’s buttons, both of your tempers ignite. To make up for it, you give him an impromptu salsa dancing lesson…one he didn’t exactly ask for. (18+)
AN: Here's Part 2! **Read Devour Me: Part 1
Song Inspo: “Yo No Se Mañana” by Luis Enrique. But really it’s “Ven Devórame Otra Ves” by Lalo Rodriguez. (You’ll see why.) 🤭
Word Count: 5,400
Tags/Warnings: 18+ only! Blood, character death and violence, smutty smut, angst, Dominican slang, and tons of sexy fluff.
☕ Midnight Espresso Masterlist
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Part 2: "Telenovela Style"
Your resulting scream of agony is as unforgiving as the ground when your knees buckle, hitting the hard cement.
Andy grips you with the strength of a monster. 
Then he holds you down as he drinks your blood. 
No matter how you struggle and whimper, you can’t push him off, and you’re getting weaker by the second.
Until Andy is ripped away from your neck, and is taken care of the way all vampires must be. He doesn’t even feel the blade coming. 
When you’re able to look up, Dean stands above you with thinly veiled fury. He doesn’t have time to consider what he’s just done. 
He bends to gather you up into his arms, all the while trying to stamp down the panic clenching his heart. He calls your name, but you can only make weak sounds as your bleary eyes meet his. 
“Dean,” you manage. The ragged wound in your neck is bleeding profusely down your chest and shoulder, seeping into your shirt. He takes your hand and clamps it hard against your neck, even though it makes you whimper.
“Gotta stop the bleeding,” he says, apologetic but firm. “Keep pressing.”
In your stupor of pain, you don’t realize that your screech woke the entire nest. Dean has to lock up his worry; he looks up and finds his brother and Cas already fighting a hoard of angry vampires. 
Dean carries you over to them and lays you down against the wall with the other humans. He keeps a protective line in front of you, but he decapitates a vampire before she can sink her fangs into Sam next.
The two of them work together, and with Castiel’s smiting power behind them, the angel and the two men are able to clear the rest of the nest. 
By the end, only you and two of the women being held captive are still alive. The third girl’s heart just finally gave out. Sam takes the survivors to the nearest hospital. 
Meanwhile, Castiel approaches where you sit up against the inside of the barn, barely awake, while Dean kneels with you, holding you to his chest. He meet’s Cas’s blue-eyed request with a nod. So Cas stretches out a hand and touches two fingers to your forehead. 
You’re healed in an instant. Dean marvels, like he always does when Cas displays his power. Dean is able to breathe a little easier, the vice grip on his heart easing as he touches your neck.
The tan skin is once again smooth, if still stained with blood. You blink back into wakeful consciousness. 
He shifts so he can see your face. “You okay?” 
You meet his eyes but can only nod. His jaw is still tight and tense, and you can’t blame him. 
You know you’ve messed up. Big time. You nearly got everyone killed, including yourself…and now, you have to tell a mother that her son is dead. 
Dean helps you up, holding you by your arms and waist until you’re steady on your feet. You have a hard time meeting his eyes, but when open your mouth to apologize, he beats you to it. 
“I hope you’ve learned your damn lesson,” he says. 
Your gaze snaps up to his. “Excuse me?”
Dean’s hands go to his hips as his brows raise at you. 
“Next time, when I tell you to hang back, I mean that shit. Hang the hell back,” he all but growls. 
You tilt your head at him as your irritation begins to spark. Meanwhile, Castiel is the one who backs up as he glances between you and Dean uncertainly.
“I made a mistake, but that doesn’t give you the right to tell me what to do,” you shoot back. “I was a hunter long before I met you.” 
“Yeah, well, color me surprised that you’ve made it this long,” he snaps. 
Your temper flares hotter. “You know, you’re not so goddamn perfect either.” 
“Never said I was,” Dean says. “But when my gut tells me something ain’t right, I need you to fucking listen. Otherwise, we get a day like today.”
His words are edged with grit by the end of his little rant, and you don’t appreciate it. Your lips purse in anger.
“I don’t care what that legendary gut tells you,” you sass back. “I’m not a little girl, and you’re not my damn father!”
Dean raises incredulous brows at the way you’re shouting at him. He crosses his arms. 
“What’s this, some kind of Latina temper?” he asks snidely. 
You truly become incensed at that. 
“Oh, you want to take it there?” you ask, as your eyes narrow. “Que sin vergüenza tú eres. Sigue jodiendo conmigo, coño. Entonces tú vas a ver quien soy yo.”
Dean won’t admit it, but in that moment, he’s a bit intimidated by the quiet threat in your voice. Still, his fuse is lit, and he’s way beyond curbing his internal filter.
“Oh, I’m sorry, does this telenovela-style tongue lashing come with subtitles?” he snarks. 
You let out an incredulous breath. Your eyes begin to sting.
“You’re such an asshole!” you shout back. There, understand that?
You turn away from him before your frustrated tears can fall, but you stop short once you notice Castiel dragging out the bodies of the dead…including Andy. Your throat constricts, and you begin to stalk out of the barn. 
Dean calls your name in frustration. 
“What?” you hiss. 
The only thing that makes him hesitate is seeing the state of you when you turn back around. His anger crumbles, and maybe something in him breaks when he sees your tears. They’ve welled up in your eyes, and a few of them carve a path down your cheeks. 
You’re still covered in your own blood, and he hates it. He hates it more than anything. 
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Later, you see the state of yourself when Sam returns with the Impala. In the reflection on the backseat window, you see the blood dried down your neck, staining nearly half of your shirt.
You see the black rings of your mascara and eyeliner around your eyes. You look a mess, and you try to wipe underneath your eyes. It’s a fruitless effort.
After you all finish burning the bodies, Dean starts the long drive home. You insist on stopping to tell Rachel Campbell about her son, but Sam says he already took care of it when he drove into town. 
You frown, but you no longer have the energy to be angry. You further withdraw into yourself, and your lower lip trembles as you look out the window. Through the rearview mirror, Dean sees more tears slipping down your face.
What Sam told him (but he won’t tell you), is what one of the survivors said. One of the mated pairs had taken Andy…to “adopt” a son of their own. 
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That night is quiet and tense in Dean’s room. You have to wash your hair all over again, and scrub the blood and grime from your body until only your skin remains. But you don’t have the energy to do more than braid your wet hair afterwards and pull on your lucky Journey shirt, which is still full of holes. 
Dean knows that it’s bad when you need the “dreamcatcher,” as he’s called it in his head. You’ve never had a nightmare while wearing that shirt, or so you claimed a while back. 
You wear it over some long pajama pants instead of your usual shorts, or better yet, nothing at all. But he can see what kind of mood you’re in. Things are unsettled as you both get ready for bed in silence. 
He notes the way you turn to face the other side in bed, maybe to avoid him. Though if you really wanted to do that, you could’ve gone to your old room.
So in more ways than one, Dean takes some solace in the fact that you’re still next to him. And he decides to give you some time and space. 
He goes to bed and tries in vain to sleep.
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In the morning, Dean’s woken by the familiar smell of coffee…and the less familiar sound of loud salsa music. 
What the fuck?
After he brushes his teeth, he puts on his robe and slippers and heads down to the kitchen, where he finds you in a seemingly better mood. You’re mopping the floor, of all things. You’re out of your pajamas, instead wearing a loose shirt that falls off your shoulder and some spandex shorts. 
“Yo no se mañana…yo no se mañana. Si estaremos juntos, si se acaba el mundo,” you sing softly along with the music as you dance from the kitchen to the living room. Your phone is connected to a Bluetooth speaker on the coffee table. 
Dean starts to smile, crossing his arms as he leans against the doorway to watch you.
At an instrumental break with a run of conga drums and trumpets, you pause in your mopping to do a little twirl as you dance, with a soulful roll of hips and a flair of salsa steps. It makes Dean’s smile kick up into a smirk.
He walks in on purposefully light feet until he’s sidled up behind you in the living room.
“Nice moves, Shakira,” he quips. 
It startles a shriek of surprise out of you as you whirl around. Dean’s smile hikes up into a grin, but it soon fades when he remembers the way your scream rang through his ears last night. The way his heart dropped into his stomach, and his head swiveled at the sound. And he saw you go down hard. 
Then the rest of it tumbles through his mind—what he had to do afterwards in order to save you. How he’d did it without really thinking, his panic and determination blocking out almost everything else when he’d grabbed the kid. The monster, he forcibly reminds himself. 
“You trying to give me a heart attack?” you ask with a hand on your heart. 
Dean forces himself to smile a little. “Sorry. But might I remind you, not everyone here’s an early bird.”
You give him a wry look.
“You’re the only one around here who sleeps past 10 a.m. Cas dipped out a while ago, and Sam’s on a run.” 
But you graciously grab your phone to lower the music to a more bearable level. Dean doesn’t yet know this about you, but this—listening to music, dancing, cleaning—it’s all your way of coping…and releasing as much of your pain, terror, and regret from yesterday as possible. 
You then look up at him more guarded. The two of you exchanged a lot of unsavory words last night. In fact, it may just be the worst fight you two have ever had in almost three years of knowing one another.  
Dean senses the shift in you, and his amusement fades. He just can't let things stay like this. He won't.
He hazards drawing closer and touching your arm.
“Look…I’m sorry for snapping at you yesterday. I know I was being a dick,” he says. “You’ve just gotta understand something.”
You wait for him to continue with furrowed brows, sensing that whatever he’s about to say is hard for him. 
“There’s a reason I don’t do this. The uh, relationship thing,” Dean continues, clearing his throat. His thumb swipes along your arm. “It’s not just this job. It’s my fucked up life. I tried to warn you before—” 
“Dean,” you say with a sigh, but he raises his hand. 
“Please, just…let me say it,” he says. “You know the spiel. But things can change on a dime. Even on a damn milk run, like a dusty nest of vamps.”
You know that. You know you could’ve died yesterday, and he doesn’t need to remind you of that fact. Before you can start to get petulant again though, Dean continues. His jaw is working, like this next part is more difficult for him to admit.
“Trust me when I say, us being together is dangerous, for both of us,” he says. “For a while I, uh…I started to think Sam and I were better off alone.”
That casts you into dismay. Because you know Dean isn’t lying. He’s really contemplated spending the rest of his life devoid of love, so he won’t have to lose it. 
Dangerous, for both of us.
You realize then what Dean’s really saying. He’s afraid…afraid to lose you. You see it in his furrowed brows, the downturn of his lips, and whatever pain he’s trying to hide in the depths of his eyes. 
And just like that, the water works start. You can’t quite keep your tears at bay as you hold onto his shirt. He lets out a resigned sigh as he holds you by your arms. 
“You don’t have to cry for that,” he says, a bit teasing. 
“Have you met me?” you sniff. But you manage to look up at him with your glassy eyes. “I’m sorry too. God, I’m so sorry, Dean.” 
Your fist clenches in his shirt when you remember Andy, latched onto your neck, and how Dean had to save you. You know he’s remembering it too when his brows furrow, and his gaze falls away. You reach a hand for his cheek.
“I know I fucked up,” you admit. “I was working with my heart, not my head. I just…”
You wanted so badly to help that kid and his mother. You also know that Dean understands; you see it in his eyes. He holds your hand to his cheek and brushes his thumb across the back of your hand.
“I know,” he says. “I really am sorry, baby.” 
The problem is, you didn’t just see your own mother in Rachel. She hadn’t been much older than you. And when you imagine a life beyond hunting, more than anything (no matter how much you shove down the idea), you really do want a family of your own someday. 
It’s just…days like yesterday remind you why that could be a very bad idea. 
More of your tears bubble over, and you head willingly into Dean’s arms. “Me too…”
He holds you tighter than ever. His hands rub down your back, tangle in your hair, and he drops his lips onto your hair. You sniffle, wiping your face dry in his shirt. And for a while, the two of you have peace in the relative quiet. 
Music still plays from the speaker though. And when another salsa song starts to play on your playlist, you start swaying. A smile works its way onto Dean’s face. 
“You can’t help yourself, can you?” he teases.
You smile into his chest. “We should go dancing sometime.”
Dean just laughs. “Oooh, no.”
“Oh, yes,” you reply, batting your lashes up at him. You slip a hand on his shoulder and into one of his hands. He’s forced to hold you as if the two of you were about to start Fred Astair-ing across the living room. 
“Have you ever danced before?” you ask. “Like real dancing.” 
“Not salsa, I’ll tell you that,” he quips. 
“That’s okay. I’ll teach you,” you reply with a coquettish smile. “It’s just a few simple moves.”
Dean gives you a wan look. “You made it look anything but simple.”
You blush at that, but you meet him with a pout of disappointment. You don’t let up, even when Dean frowns. He huffs at you in resistance.
“No,” he insists. You just brush a gentle thumb along his neck, biting your lip in askance.  
But the longer he stares at your beautiful, hopeful eyes, the more cracks form in his resolve. 
Eventually, Dean breaks with a sigh, and a shake of his head. 
“You’re too much, you know that?” he mutters.
It’s then that you know you’ve won.
So with a happy squeal of excitement, you clap your hands and move to stand next to him so you can show him the basic steps of salsa dancing. 
You make him take off his robe and slippers, leaving in his shirt and plaid pajama pants. Then you instruct him for a few minutes, correcting his footing and getting him to move on a beat. You’re pleasantly surprised that he has some rhythm.  
Dean sighs once again. How the hell did we get here? Heat crawls up the back of his neck as embarrassment starts to set in. 
“This is fucking ridiculous,” he grumbles.
“You’re doing good,” you encourage, with a growing smile. “Now come on, feel the beat in threes. One, two, three. One, two, three…”
Once he sort of has the basic steps and turns down, you move to stand in front of him. There you show him how to hold you, how he’ll move forward, and you’ll move back. It takes a little while, but you slowly move through the combinations, then do a little twirl underneath his hand. 
When he pulls you back in without faltering, you give him a beaming smile. “Very good!”
A subtle grin raises his lips at your enthusiasm. He also feels his face heating up at the praise.
But you pause when a certain song filters through the speakers. It’s an old one (and it never fails to make you blush), but you love it.  
“Ooh, yes,” you exclaim with delight, and you turn up the volume.
“What’s this one?” Dean asks.
“Ven Devórame Otra Ves,” you inform him. Not that he knows what that means. You sing along a bit with the first couple of verses while you encourage Dean to lead you in the dance. 
This song is just slow enough for him to attempt it, and the funny thing is, he doesn’t feel all that uncomfortable with the steps now. He’s starting to get a feel for how to move, both with his feet, and with his hands as he guides you by your waist, holding your hand close to his chest. Still, Dean’s also curious about the lyrics you’re singing. 
“What does it mean?” he asks.
You huff in amusement. “You sure you want to know?”
Dean raises a brow. “Well, now I gotta know.” 
You giggle at that, though you correct his steps when he leads with the wrong foot. 
“Okay. It’s about a guy who’s pretty much a player,” you say with a smirk. “His bed has been a revolving door of hot ass, but he keeps thinking about this one woman who used to have him turned inside out…”
Dean’s lips curve at the familiar image you’re conjuring. He manages to turn you under his hand, then pull you back to him in one smooth motion. He looks down at you with a deeper gleam in his eyes. You bite your lip, soothing your hand from his shoulder and down his arm.
As the song’s verses come, you translate for him. And for Dean, your voice in itself is a spell.
“Even in my dreams, he says, I thought I had you devouring me. And I dampened my white sheets remembering you,” you begin. Your words are smooth like black velvet. “In my bed, no one is like you, who draws my body on every corner, without a piece of skin left over.”
Dean is getting hot under the collar as you push away, dragging your fingertips along his back as you turn around him. When you come back into his line of vision, his attention is attracted to the sway of your hips, clad just in those little spandex shorts. He has to clear his throat a bit. 
You eventually return to him with a warm hand against his chest. 
“Ven, devórame otra ves. It means, come devour me again,” you continue, looking up at him from under your lashes, “Come punish me more with your desire. Because I kept my love for you…because my mouth has the taste of your body.” 
You smile at the laser focus of his green-eyed gaze. “Come devour me again.”
You push off with another little spin. When you reach for his hand, Dean yanks you back into him, eliciting a gasp. The move disorients you for a moment, but you giggle and hold onto his arms. Your hands glide up to rest on his shoulders. 
He’s holding you flush against him, and as you shift a thigh between his legs, you unintentionally graze against his hardening length. You look up at him with a smirk.
“You’re a little…stiff,” you say, both flirtatious and teasing. “Let’s loosen you up.”
You shake his shoulders out and try to get him to relax. Dean raises a wry brow, because you know damn well whose fault it is that his body is coiled tight. But you place his hands on your hips as you move back into the dance. 
“Feel what I’m doing there?” you ask. He looks down on you with growing heat.
“If I could do that, we wouldn’t be together,” he rumbles. 
You try to stifle a laugh as he pulls you in close again, just swaying for a bit. Soon enough, you grin knowingly when his hands start to slide lower on your ass. His head bows to yours, ready to meet you with a kiss. 
You stop him with your finger on his lips.
“Question: do you consider yourself more of a tits or ass man?” you ask him. You’re half teasing, but still curious. Dean snorts at the question. 
“More of a connoisseur,” he replies, smirking. 
“Ah.” You nod sagely, and you point between him and yourself. “So this is like a ‘sample the menu’ situation.”
Dean’s smirk deepens. “Sweetheart, you’re a goddamn buffet.”
You splutter laughing…and that’s when he finally pounces. He claims your lips with greedy passion. His hand winds into your hair, gripping tight and ruining what’s left of your loose ponytail. The strands coil around his hand in messy curls while he also gets a healthy grip of your ass through your thin shorts. 
You smile into his lips, even as you acquiesce to him guiding your head to the side, so he can slip his tongue against yours. You grip his arms more for stability while he manhandles you, kneading soft flesh and making pleasant tingles run up your spine. 
After a little while, his mouth burns a hot path away from yours. He noses down your neck, skimming his lips across your skin. It sets your nerve endings on fire and gets you breathing more shallowly in his ear. You cling to the back of his shirt, holding him close. 
Often he’s one to leave love bites of varying degrees, wherever he sees fit. But for a moment he stops at the crook of your neck, just pressing a lingering kiss.
He lets out a deep breath, and you realize he’s probably thinking about where you were bitten. The wound is gone, but it doesn’t change what’s imprinted in both of your minds.  
A softer smile grows on your face. You trail your fingers up into his hair, massaging the back of his neck. 
“I’m okay,” you remind him. Dean hums deep in agreement. You know, however, that he’s still thinking far too much.
So you slide your hands down, slow between the dips and planes of muscle in his back, and rest at his hips. Your thumbs delve under the hem of his shirt and tease the skin there. 
And you start slow, pressing wet, nipping kisses of your own to his neck while you inch his shirt up. You feel his smile on your neck. His grip on your hip flares to life. Still, he lets you tug his shirt up and over his head. Your loose shirt comes next, revealing the same black satin and lace bra you wore the first time he ever got you topless in his arms. 
A fan favorite. Dean grins. He reaches around to go for the clasp, but your firm push on his chest takes him by surprise.
He falls back onto the couch with a grunt, looking up at you then with raised brows. You’ve got a mischievous little smirk on your face that heats his blood and makes his cock twitch.
You take out the rest of your falling ponytail, shaking your hair out wild. Then you let your hands drift down your neck, over your clothed breasts, and finally to your little shorts.
Dean rubs his palms down his thighs and watches. A smirk forms across his lips as you slide the fabric down the curve of your hips. It leaves you in a red thong, familiar to him by the little tear it has on the front. (Again, his fault.)
You climb aboard his strong thighs to straddle his lap, using his shoulders as leverage as you sink down. You make sure to rub yourself teasingly against his clothed erection. He groans in appreciation. His hands fly to your soft, thick thighs and squeeze. 
“Aw, I like this,” Dean says, half on another moan as you grind down a bit harder on him. 
“Yeah?” you tease. You take his face in your hands and capture his lips with your own. Your tongue invades his mouth, and he welcomes you with a deep hum. It’s slow and hot at first, but Dean feels the loss of you when you break from his lips.
Instead, you treat him with the same trail of kisses he gave you, along the curve of his jaw and down his neck. But you don’t stop there.
Your hands move over his chest with purpose, tweaking over each hard nipple while your mouth burns a wet line down and down his sternum. Dean groans at your ministrations, but lets you leave his lap to slide down to the ground, between his thighs. 
“What’re you up to, baby?” he asks, despite having a very good idea of it. He catches the playful, yet determined gleam in your eye. 
You pause, briefly leaning back up to give him a heated kiss. You part from him with a grin. 
“Isn’t it obvious?” you ask. “I’m gonna devour you.”
Dean stares hard at you as goosebumps break out across his forearms. 
Oh, fuck yeah. 
A giggle bubbles in your throat at the expression on his face. But you continue, taking his pants down his legs first, before his boxer briefs. 
Dean’s body tenses in anticipation. You’ve gone down on him before, but somehow it’s different this time. He feels like every single one of his nerve endings stands at attention along with his dick. And you’re taking your sweet time working him up. 
Even when his cock is finally free, you sooth your hands down his legs first, maybe teasing him a bit as you drag your nails down his inner thighs. Dean makes a strained sound, though he tries to hide it by clearing his throat.
Your gaze flicks up to his with a little smile. He’s holding the back of the couch; his fingers are digging into the old cushion in effort to keep still for you. But his eyes stare into yours like a man starving. You know what you’re in for after you have your way with him, but for now, he’s quite literally under your control. 
So you take him in your hands first. Dean groans as you tease him with light touches, soft movements, your thumb slowly circling over the sensitive, weeping head of his cock. It's torturous enough to make him drop his head back against the couch, closing his eyes tight.
And suddenly, he blinks them open again.
“Shit,” he utters, when you finally take him into your mouth. Your tongue is soft and wet, your lips move over him steadily, and your hands caress whatever your mouth can’t take, even teasing his balls. 
You work him over relentlessly, until he can’t help but spill everything he has to give into your waiting mouth. When you suck off and swallow whatever remains, Dean’s heart stutters like syncopated conga drums. 
He shudders and struggles for breath afterwards, watching your every movement—from wiping your mouth to shooting him that satisfied little smirk. 
You press one last kiss to the inside of his thigh before you raise from where you’ve been kneeling on the hard ground. 
Dean manages to lean forward and helps you up by your elbows. But then he pulls you back into his lap and kisses you deeply. He doesn’t let up until you’re panting with him.
“Fuckin’ hell, sweetheart,” he manages to say. His voice is deep and laced with grit. 
He’s still panting heavily. You giggle and press your warming face into his neck. 
“What, now you’re shy?” he remarks. And he has to laugh. “Come back here.”
He brings your face back to him with a hand on your cheek. For a second, he just looks at you. His thumb strokes across your full, thoroughly kissed bottom lip.  
“Say it,” you encourage softly. “Whatever you’re thinking. Right now.”
A smile tugs at his lips. He can’t help but oblige you. 
“You’re too damn much,” he says again, both gruff and fond. Despite how you drive him up the fucking wall sometimes, he doesn't think it'll ever be enough for him, what he has with you.
Because this is something he'd almost given up on. Didn't think he'd get to have it. And it almost scares him, how much he wants you. How much he...
“I love you,” he says. His thumb traces along the familiar curve of your cheek.
It hasn’t been all that long, but he knows. You weaseled your way in without even trying. The least he can do for you is be honest.
Your fingers curl around his wrist, holding his hand in place. You tilt your head at him.
“Oh, yeah?” you ask. 
Dean hesitates, but he nods. “Yeah.”
A smile grows across your face. “Eh, I’m still on the fence.”
At his flat look, you laugh and lean in for a kiss. He allows it, a little petulantly. But you make up for it with sweet affection. Your gentle hands stroke down the column of his neck, down his chest. You then lean back so he can see your face.
“Yo te amo,” you whisper. “Te amo y te quiero, más que tú puedes creer y entender.”
Dean smiles. He doesn’t understand all of it, but he gets the important bits. He hears it in the tone of your voice. He sees it in your eyes. They shine with emotion, but mainly with love. 
Dean kisses your hand. He lets go, just so he can slip his hands around you to finally unhook your bra. He tosses it across the room without bothering to see where it lands.
You do though, and you meet him with a slightly narrowed gaze. 
“Are you making a mess of my clean bunker?” you tease. 
His lips curve as he kisses you again, while his hands each get a generous handful of your breasts. 
“Ah, hello, ladies." He grins. "Miss me?”
You can’t help but laugh. He’s such a dork sometimes.
But you hum when his thumbs brush over hardened nipples, then drag deliberate circles over them, and pinch just hard enough to make you whimper in pleasure. The sensation zips through you, enhancing the flood between your legs. 
“I fucking love that sound,” Dean mutters, and licks a hot path in the valley between your breasts. His lips move against your dewy skin when he says, “Do that for me again.”
When he takes a nipple in his mouth and nips a bit hard, you have to oblige him. Your voice rising high is music to his ears.  
So he goes for your panties next. You help him get them off and return to his lap. With a breathy moan, you revel at the feeling of his fingers probing into your wet heat.  
However, you and Dean have been too engrossed in one another to notice the door of the bunker unlocking, and heavy steps down the spiral staircase. 
It’s Sam who’s back from his run. Unfortunately, he soon has to shield his eyes upon reaching the living room. 
“Damn it, Dean!”
You yelp in surprise, but Dean laughs and holds you close to shield you from view. As a bonus, it presses your breasts against his chest. 
“All right, Sammy. Go to your room,” he chides playfully (but he means it). “The adults are havin’ a moment.”
Sam scoffs. “You’re having a moment on the goddamn couch!”
“Sorry,” you say, though it’s muffled in Dean’s neck. Your face is red hot with embarrassment. 
Sam rolls his eyes heavenward and tries not to see anything else on his way to his room. 
But Dean’s chuckle reverberates through your chest as his hand goes to your cheek. He encourages you to pull back, so he can see your face again. 
When he does, he smirks at the scarlet blush dusting your cheeks and neck. You bite your lower lip, but despite your embarrassment, you’re happy.
Your own words replay in your mind when you lean in for another kiss.
I love you, you’d said. I love you and I love you, more than you can believe and understand. 
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AN: Yay! I hope you enjoyed Part 2 of the “Midnight Espresso”-verse! I loved writing this one so much. I know we're just doing fanfic here, but I genuinely put my heart and soul into this one. ❤️
Also, here are a couple of Spanish translations:
(Note: other Spanish-speaking countries may interpret certain words differently.)
[During their fight]: 
“Que sin vergüenza tú eres. Sigue jodiendo conmigo, coño. Entonces tú vas a ver quien soy yo.”
Translation:
“You’re shameless. Keep messing with me, damn it. Then you’re going to see who I am (<- This is Dominican slang. It essentially means fuck around and find out what I'm made of.).”
[Song lyrics: “Yo No Se Mañana” by Luis Enrique]: 
“Yo no se mañana…yo no se mañana. Si estaremos juntos, si se acaba el mundo.”
Translation:
“I don’t know tomorrow. I don’t know tomorrow. If we’ll be together, if the world will end.”
Keep Reading:
Next in this series is "Chico Malo" ("Bad Boy"):
Summary: You catch Dean red-handed—with one of his favorite episodes of Casa Erotica.
▶️ Next Story: Bad Boy (Chico Malo)
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katiascraft · 2 days ago
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"Tender is the night for a broken heart" | CL16
Parings: Charles Leclerc x Reader.
Summary: you been feeling very sad lately. Your emotional stress is taking you places you didn’t want to back in ever again. And Charles knows it - just wanna make sure you know you are loved despite it all.
Now playing: "Space song" by Super Pipo.
Word count: +2k
Warnings: INSINUATION OF SUICIDE - if you are sensitive to these kind of topics please don’t read it. ANGST WITH HAPPY ENDING. VERY SAD. Not a native English speaker so there could be (so many) errors. I do what I can. Not proofread.
Author's note: I may or may not written this one about a real situation. PLEASE READ WITH CAUTION. Hope you like it and sorry in advanced if I make you cry. Charles the man that you are in my head 😭. Don’t forget to comment, like or reblog! And follow me so we can be friends :3 (and drink mate together!)
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The wind was brushing the tears that were dropping from your eyes gently. You were shaking, scared. Nature was the only thing that surrounded you. Tall pines with your favorite gradient of green were all around you. You could hear the bird singing. You thought it was morning because the sun on your face was warm - that made you close your eyes to take it all in. that made you sob even harder. You could hear the water of the river crashing against the stonewall of the cliff you were standing on. when you opened your eyes you could see that you were on the edge of it. You took a gasp of fair freezing in the moment. A feeling so overwhelming took over you starting to sweat. Your hands wrapped your own body around. You hugged yourself there. The pain eating you alive was almost unbearable. The wind intensified, sending shivers down your spine. You closed your eyes again, ready to let go of everything. Of this pain you carried along so many years of your life. This burden you carried everywhere. This ghost living inside you is trapped, washing away your personality. Your soul felt in prison by the canvas it got. Your body felt the most uncomfortable place to exist. Your mind was so twisted sometimes you didn't know what was reality and what was your anxiety inventing fake scenarios which will hunt you all night long. Living with you was so difficult. It felt impossible for you that someone could actually love just by who you were. If you are this dark entity then who could love you? Anyone. Your mind convinced you, you needed to end it all to be finally free. You knew you were meant to fly. You just needed to let go. Relax your body and let it float. Let it fall into the immensity of the universe. Let you find a better place to live in. have your happy ending. You finally opened your eyes again out of breath trembling. You were ready. This was it for you. It was time. It was finally time. You even smiled.
But when you were about to let go you started hearing that voice. The same voice you heard every morning and you didn't know why it would choose to stick around your misery.
“y/n! y/n stop!” his voice almost broke your ears of how loud he screamed. You stopped freezing at your feet. Your heart started pounding like crazy. Adrenaline takes over your body turning your face red. Tears started to come out again even more violently. “y/n please don't do it!” his voice was torn in desperation. He was crying as violently as you, you could feel it. You could feel him grabbing your arms. You saw the watered disappear. Now you could only see the stone of the mountain you were standing on. You screamed at the top of your lungs and then everything was black.
“No!” you woke up sweating cold. You were a sea of tears shaking. Charles was already awake. He was trying to wake you up for a couple of minutes and now is really worried about you. You couldn't stop crying stunned by the nightmare you've just had.
“y/n. It's okay, love. I am here. You are ok” he said gently so wouldn't scare you. He grabbed you in his arms carefully. You looked so fragile he was scared he could break you. His heart ached seeing you like this.
These past few weeks were really hard on your end. You started feeling like your old self, self doubting about everything and anything. Insecure you weren't enough anymore for him or your job or your friend or even your family. You started feeling like a burden again lost in your own pain and struggle. Life was always a little harder for you. You've been out of really toxic relationships during your teenagehood that broke you down so bad you had to rebuild yourself all over again as if you weren't ever born. All this trauma you carried made everyday harder to live for you. You developed social issues not knowing how to interact or make friends as the aftermath. You also couldn't trust people or ask for help. Yeah, you were depressed for a couple of years. Thankfully you met Charles at your best self you liked to think. You were starting to feel happier. You liked who you were becoming. It wasn't that hard anymore to talk to people or open up with them.
When you met, you never thought Charles would even like you to be fair. He was the most gorgeous guy you have ever met. Real life prince charming you used to tell your friends. You were only an average girl, a troubled and messed up one, you thought you had no chance with him. But at the end of the road trip with friends he kissed you and you felt so overwhelmed with joy you couldn't believe it was actually your life, the one you were living. It felt strange and at the same time amazing. It was so easy with Charles to open up to him and tell him your story. He never judged you nor ran away from you scared. He didn't see you as a monster. As a broken record never able to be fixed. He fell in love with you because to him you were the sweetest person with the biggest heart he has ever talked to. You were so honest and real to everyone about everything he fell for it. He fell for your loud and weird laugh. So Precious and contagious. With your beautiful sparkly eyes always so honest and crystal clear. You were so you, so real. He felt you were so brave to be so you. In his world it was uncommon for your kind of people. He knew since the first night he met you at Lando´s birthday 5 years ago that you were the one. He didn't know you but he already knew. Destiny told him.
He knew your struggles, of course he did. He always listened to you. Felt so heartbroken every time. If he could, he would literally murder every single monster - because the one who hurt you didn't deserve to be called even humans - that did all of that to you. To him you were so pure, maybe too good for this cruel world. He tried to protect you from it all the best he could. But there was one thing he couldn't protect you against and that was your mind. He knew that your mind was the one who could move earth and seas just to hurt you in the worst way possible.
Heknew something was off with you when you started retreating. You stopped going to friends´ dinners. You didn't assist in the races you were supposed to. You stopped getting out of home more and more. You barely went out to the garden. Most of the time you were in your studio working non stop to preoccupy your mind and not think. He knew you were struggling when I stopped doing your hair the way you loved to do it. Stopped wearing your fancy outfits just to drive him crazy and urging you to take them all off when you two got home. You stopped eating the meals you were supposed to. He knew you avoid seeking help when you feel this down. He knew it was really hard for you so he let you be and wait for you to take your time until you're ready to address your feelings.
Tonight you were asleep when he got home from Max´s. You didn't want to go either and Max was your best friend. Charles was really concerned about you. He hated seeing you like this when you don't deserve to feel this. He would burn the world alive just for you to be happy if needed. You were sleeping peacefully so he decided to take a shower and join you. He laid next to you on his side to look at your face so peacefully relaxed. So angelical. He always felt so lucky to have you around in his life. Even without noticing you were the light of his life. You made him so incredibly happy, heard, understood, supported, embraced. You were his angel. Always reaching for him to give him a hand with anything he needed. So patient and understanding. You were his favorite place and he wished he could make you feel the same. Because he loved you with every fiber on his body and the only wish he had was for you to be happy.
After about 20 minutes of sleeping or so he woke up to you sobbing uncontrollably next to him. You were asleep. He guessed you were either having a nightmare or sleep paralysis. He settled on the bed so he could try to wake you up. His heart was racing in anxiety full of worry. He tried to wake you up for a couple of long minutes until you finally did and he clothed you in his arms. He rocked you gently trying to comfort you in some way.
“I'm sorry baby you feel this way” he whispered with a knot on his throat. You were shaking still but your crying ceased little by little. He kissed your temple lovingly and carefully. You just stayed like that until you could calm down.
When you did you felt drained. Your heart aches as your face from your salty tears and tries to wipe them everytime. Charles cupped your cheeks making you look at him. You felt so guilty and embarrassed to make him go through this. He didn't deserve to be with a broken soul. He deserved better. Someone that could make him happy as he deserved. You looked at him, his eyes glassy with tears.
“Listen to me y/n, i know you may or may not believe me. But listen to me okay?” you swallowed hard, ready to hate yourself for being a burden to him. “I love you. I know you feel like you don't deserve me like you are not enough for me. But let me tell you all of that is not true. I swear I would kill all these people who made you believe all these awful things about you if I could. You don't deserve to feel this pain baby. You are beautiful. You are important to so many people. You make so happy you don't have an idea” his voice cracked making you start crying again and so did he. “You really do y/n, please, believe me. You are an amazing person despite everything that happened to you. You fought so hard to be who you are and I promise it's beautiful to see. And I'm so proud of you baby. Everyone is, I promise. You are really important to me and to everyone that knows you. You are light and I know you don't feel like it. That you feel like a burden but you aren't. And you'll never be for the right people, the ones that see you, the real you. and the real you is so interesting and pretty baby. Yes you are my love” he was crying and smiling. You were sobbing but didn't take your eyes away from him. He was burning your soul with his words. Telling you everything you needed to hear and he didn't even know that. Charlie was so perfect to you even in this shitty as fuck situations with your mental health. You felt so lucky right there in his arms under the sight of his beautiful eyes that looked at you with deep love.
“I love you charlie” you said below whisper and hugged him tightly hiding yourself under his frame. You wanted to hide there forever if possible. He intensified his grip and kissed your head trying to comfort you as much as he could.
“You deserve to be happy y/n, i really mean it. You're the best person i've ever come to know.” he said softly making butterflies fly like crazy on your stomach. The pain you felt was fading away now little by little. You felt so dumb for not talking sooner about your feelings but you forgave yourself. That's what your therapist told you. You need to be more gentle with yourself and give the same understanding perspective as you give to others. Treat yourself as you treat others. Always.
“You make me happy” you said with your face buried in his neck not wanting to get out of there anytime soon. He smiled relieved and pressed gentle kisses on your cheek.
He was the first person who listened to your soul. And you knew right there that with him by your side you could heal and finally be the person you deserve to be and be loved just because.
Charles was the love of your life. And he was yours. There´s nothing to be afraid of.
You will be more than okay.
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marvelfanfn2187a113 · 2 days ago
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My Angel
Sam and Dean & teen!reader, Castiel & teen!reader
Requested by Anonymous
Synopsis: you’re a daughter figure to team free will, and you have time/location travel powers. One time you accidentally time travel back too far, and you have to face TFW before they met you.
Warnings: panic attack, then pretty much fluff
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“Hey Sam?” You knocked on Sam’s door softly—no answer. You slowly pressed the door open, peaking in and seeing Sam fast asleep on his bed. You took a step back, pulling the door closed as silently as possible; you’d wanted his help to study for your test, but he hadn’t been sleeping much lately while he dealt with all the hunters now living in the bunker, so you wanted to let him sleep.
Next stop was Dean—but he was out on a hunt with Mary. Finally, you wandered around looking for Cas. You found him in the library poring over lore.
“Cas?” You approached him hesitantly, a notebook hugged to your chest. “Do you think you could—“
“Not now, Y/N,” Cas huffed, rubbing a hand over his face. “I need to finish this.”
“Oh.” You bit your lip. “Do you think maybe later you could—“
“Not now!” He snapped. “I’m a little busy trying to keep your brother from dying!”
You snapped your mouth shut, turning on your heel and leaving without another word.
“No, wait…” Cas’s regret came a split second too late. “I’m sorry!”
You clicked the lock shut on your room door, tossing your notebook on your desk before dropping down on your bed.
“Calm down calm down calm down,” you whispered to yourself over and over, rubbing your face and a few stray tears. The pile of homework on your desk already had you panicked, and you hadn’t been prepared for Cas to yell at you like that. Not only that, but on top of the homework you had a huge test, and you knew you weren’t ready.
Your handle on your emotions had been slipping lately due to all the stress, and with that came a lack of control on your powers. That had led to a lot more “incidents” lately—usually you’d just get transported to a few minutes in the past, or a mile or two away, but you were always scared that if your emotions got big enough, there would be bigger jumps.
“Stop it,” you willed your pounding heart to no avail. Your breath was coming in quicker and quicker gasps, and it was all you could do to sit up and try to keep the room from spinning. “It’s ok, you’re fine you’re fine you’re fine…”
You closed your eyes tightly as the panic took over and your head started to pound—a sure sign that you were traveling.
“No no no,” you whimpered. “Not now, just stop, just stop!”
The pain grew and your breath still hadn’t returned. You opened your eyes, but everything was still spinning, and black spots were flying around the edges of your vision. You tried to stand, but something sharp smacked against your head. The darkness spread, faster and faster and—
And nothing.
“What the heck?”
A man’s voice was the first thing you heard as you tried to force your eyes open through the pain that pounded behind them.
“Sam! Dean! Get in here!”
You groaned, blinking your blurry vision away. Dark wood lined the floor, and as you forced yourself to sit up, a room came into focus—an old couch slumped in the corner, an oak desk sat right next to you. An old man was crouched in front of you, a gun in his hand—
“Bobby?” You breathed. You’d seen the man in pictures before, but you’d never met him.
The gun twitched.
“How do you know who I am?” Bobby demanded.
“What’s going on?” Dean’s voice caught your attention—he rushed through the doorway, followed by Sam, and both froze at the sight of you. “Who the heck is that?”
The boys were younger than you’d ever seen them, by a few years at least, and you knew from what they’d told you about Bobby’s death that you must have gone back at least six or seven years—long before you’d met the boys.
“That’s what I’d like to know,” Bobby insisted, cocking the gun in his hand. “And I’d better find out in the next five seconds.”
“Ok ok wait!” You insisted, holding up your hands. Your head was pounding—you’d probably hit it on the desk when you traveled, and you could swear that you felt blood running down the side of your face. “I’m…I’m from the future.”
Three blank stares.
“Right,” Bobby scoffed. “And I’m Bill Clinton.”
“It’s true!” You insisted. “I-I have powers, but I jumped back too far.”
“Do you expect us to believe—“
“It’s true.” Dean’s protest was cut off with a flutter of wings and the deep voice of Castiel. “She’s telling the truth, she’s from the future. I can sense it.”
“So what, she can just jump around time and—“
“No,” Castiel insisted. “No, no one should have that power.” His eyes flashed blue. “I need to take care of this problem.” He took one step forwards, but Dean jumped over to block him.
“Whoa whoa, hey, easy,” Dean insisted. “She’s just a kid, what are you gonna do?”
“She shouldn’t exist,” Castiel argued. “She’s dangerous.”
“Cas?” You whimpered, backing away from him.
“How do you know me?” Cas demanded, stiffening.
“We…you…” you swallowed. “We met…or, I guess, we will meet…in a few years. You try to help me control my powers. All three of you do.”
“Three?” Bobby asked, but you kept your mouth shut.
“That doesn’t make sense,” Castiel continued. “I would’ve killed you—I should’ve—you’re dangerous.”
“And-and you’re a lot different here than you are in the future.” Your lip quivered as you spoke, still keeping as much distance from Cas as you could. He wasn’t the gentle, caring Cas that you knew—he truly looked like the dangerous angel you knew he could be.
“What are we gonna do with her?” Sam spoke up. “Shouldn’t she go back to her own time?”
“I still don’t think she should be in any time,” Cas argued, his hand twitching—probably for his angel blade.
“Please.” A tear dripped onto your hand, and you wrapped your arms around yourself—despite the familiar faces, you felt surrounded by strangers. “Please, I-I just want to go home. I didn’t mean to come here, I didn’t mean to—“ you noticed Castiel’s hand relaxing slightly, and you took a deep breath. “Cas, you…in the future, you’re like a father to me. And I just want to get back to my Cas, I just…please help me get home.”
Cas took another step forward, and Dean didn’t stop him. You flinched when Cas lifted his hand, but he just placed it gently on your shoulder.
“I…I think maybe I can get you home,” Cas said slowly. “But you need to be more careful. If you jump like this again, you could disrupt the flow of time.”
You nodded. “I understand.”
“Ok.” Cas’s eyes softened. “Then let’s get you home.” He pressed two fingers to your forehead. There was a faint pulse of blue before your world went dark.
“Y/N? Y/N!”
You jerked upright to the sound of a harsh knock at your door. You blinked hard, rubbing your eyes, then your face—the cut on your head was healed.
You got to unsteady feet before unlocking your door and swinging it open to see Cas, looking frazzled and worried.
“Cas!” Cas staggered back in surprise when you through yourself into his arms.
“Are you ok?” He demanded, holding you close.
“I missed this you.” Your voice came out muffled against Cas’s trench coat.
“I…you what?” Cas asked.
“Never mind.” You sniffled, pulling away. “I’m just glad to see you.”
“N/N, I’m sorry,” Cas insisted. “I-I didn’t mean to yell at you earlier, I just…I guess I was feeling stressed.”
“It’s ok,” you insisted.
“No it wasn’t,” Cas argued. “I’m here for you, for whatever you need.”
“I think maybe school needs to take a back burner,” you said slowly. “Can you help me…with my powers?”
“I did say whatever.” Cas smiled. “So let’s get started.”
Taglist:
@nyotamalfoy @mrvlxgrl @chocorade @aestheticdaisies @inlovewhithafairytale @that-wannabe-vangoghgurl @casmustdiee @987coley @deadlymistletoe @wayward-impala83 @whump-loverz @johannelis2302nely
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lee-laurent · 1 day ago
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Together Again - Luke Hughes
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Summary: Luke and Tori rekindle their relationship
content: angst, fighting, fluff, lots of fluff, oc x ex!john marino
wc: 3.3k
notes: PART 9! ONE MORE!!! i think the resolution between luke and john is kinda abrupt, but i didn't want to drag it on anymore and i think john would come to his senses. so... also this ends on a conversation that's gonna be the plot of the next part!!
Showing up at Luke's door made her feel like she was in a rom-com. Would've been even better if she was soaked in rain, but... she wasn't. Instead, she was awkwardly standing outside Luke and Jack's apartment, her hand raised to knock when it flew open, revealing a very put-together looking Jack.
"Tori?"
"Jack?"
"Yeah? I live here. What're you doing here? Luke doesn't want to see you."
"Oh, um, he doesn't?"
"No, he--"
"Who're you talking to?" A groggy Luke joined his brother at the door, his sweatpants hanging low on his hips, his hair a mess. "Tori?"
"I was just telling her to go. I--"
"No, no. It's fine, Jack. Come on in," Luke yawned, pushing his older brother out of the way.
"Whatever. I was just leaving anyway," Jack rolled his eyes, shutting the door loudly behind him.
"Where, um, where's he headed?" Tori asked, awkwardly rubbing her arm.
"Huh? Bar, probably. Not sure."
"You're not joining him?"
"Not really in the mood. More focused on the fact that the girl I'm supposed to be on a break from is standing in my apartment."
Tori let out a shaky breath. "I know I probably should've texted first. But... I wanted to tell you in person."
Luke sighed, leaning against the wall, his eyes studying her. "Wanted to tell me what?"
The words came out sharper than he'd intended, and he sighed again, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Sorry, I just... I don't know what you could possibly have to say to me, Tori."
She stepped closer, her voice barely audible. "Can I start with 'I'm sorry?' Because I am sorry, Luke. I thought that taking a step back, would help things. But I just pushed myself back to John. Which... which isn't where I belong. I belong with you. And I-"
"Yeah? Sleeping with your ex-boyfriend really did wonders for your self-discovery, didn't it?" he bit out, his voice dripping with hurt. "Not the fact that he's your ex for a reason?"
"Luke. Let me finish. I know what I did feels unforgivable. But it really did make me realize that John isn't who I want. He's not who I need. Not even close. And honestly, he never was, even when we were together. It's you, Luke. It's been you for a while now."
Luke looked down at her, his jaw clenched, his hands flexing at his sides as he processed her words. Finally, he murmured, "How am I supposed to believe that? You don't know what's it like... thinking that I wasn't good enough. Like I was just a... a place-holder."
"You were never that to me, Luke," she whispered. "I didn't leave because of you. I left because I was afraid of how much I felt for you and how it was going to affect my family. And I know how backwards that sounds. I know. But I didn't know what to do with it. I thought I'd figure it out and come back to us more... solid. More sure."
"Yeah, well, I didn't need you to be 'more sure,'" he replied, his voice thick. "I just needed you."
Tori's hand reached out, her fingers brushing his bicep. "Luke... I know I messed up. And I'm not asking you to just forget it all. But I'm asking you to hear me. Because walking away from us was the biggest mistake I could've made."
"I just... it made me feel..." He trailed off, struggling with his words, his fingers nervously brushing through his hair.
Tori stepped even closer, until there were only inches between them. "I know. I'm sorry. I thought I needed clarity, but I just need you. Luke, you're where I belong and I'm sorry it took me this long to realize."
He swallowed. "And what if I don't know if I can just... let it go, Tori? I refuse to go through that again."
"Again, I'm not asking you to let it go," her hand found his, removing it from his hair before he made himself go bald. "But I'm asking you to let me try. Let me show you that I want to be here. I know I made a royal mess of things, but I'm willing to put in whatever it takes to make things right. If you'll let me."
Luke's gaze softened as he looked down at their intertwined fingeres, and his thumb began to trace gentle circles on her knuckles. "I've missed you, you know that?"
Tori's heart leapt, but she kept herself steady. "I've missed you too. So much, Luke."
His lips quirked into a faint smile as he looked at her, the distance between them closing even more. "Alright. Maybe we can try again. But this time... no second-guessing, okay?"
She nodded, tears pricking her eyes as relief washed over her. "No second-guessing," she echoed. "I'm all in this time. For real."
And as he pulled her into a tight hug, Tori let the tears finally fall. They were finally starting over--together.
~~
"Are you sure you guys are going to be okay?" Tori asked Ally for the tenth time.
"We're gonna be fine, V. Relax. Go have fun with Luke. Ri-Ri and I are gonna have a blast," her best friend laughed, placing her hands on both of Tori's shoulders. "Breathe."
Tori let out a long breath, closing her eyes as she tried to relax. It wasn't the first time she was leaving Riley with a sitter, especially Ally, but the nerves of going on a date with Luke again were getting to her. Her instincts were kicking in and she felt the need to protect herself and her son.
She took one more deep breath, giving Ally a grateful smile. "Okay... okay. I'm fine. Thanks for helping out."
"You deserve this, Tori. You'll come home, and Ri will be fast asleep."
With one final hug to Riley, who was happily playing Paw Patrol in the corner, Tori headed to meet Luke. Why was she so nervous to see the man she loved? Maybe she was worried about ruining everything again.
When she arrived at the quaint pho restaurant, she spotted Luke right away. He looked more put together than when she'd showed up at his apartment, and he broke into a smile the moment he saw her.
"You made it," he stood up to greet her.
"Almost didn't, but Ally wouldn't let me dip on you."
Luke laughed. "Remind me to thank her." His voice softened as he looked down at her. "I'm glad you're here."
They settled into their seats and Luke gestured to the menu. "This place is a hidden gem."
"It's perfect. I haven't had pho in ages. Eating out with a toddler usually only consists of Chick-fil-A and pasta. So this is a treat."
Tori was worried that the conversation would be awkward, that they'd sit there in silence between topics, but it wasn't. It was just like it was before. The conversation stayed light, talking about Riley, hockey, and funny things they'd seen recently. But as the bowls grew emptier, the conversation grew deeper, more reflective.
"Luke, y'know that I don't take any of this for granted, right? Being here, with you... it's everything to me."
Luke reached across the table, his fingers brushing hers. "I'm glad you feel that way, Tori. Because I don't want half of you. I want all of this--all of you."
"You have all of me, Luke," she whispered. "I'm here."
Luke's smile grew, his eyes warm. "Tori, I don't think I can even put into words how much I missed you... and Riley."
"Riley will be thrilled to see you. He never shuts up about you and hockey."
"Future NHL player."
"Hmm... not sure about that one."
"I'll train him. He'll be skating in no time."
Tori shook her head, failing to hide her smile. "Whatever you say, Luke. Whatever you say."
~~
"Ri-Ri, look who's here," Tori grinned, pulling her son's attention away from his Duplo.
"'Uke!" he screeched, running to the door. He wrapped his arms around Luke's leg, hugging as tight as he could.
Luke chuckled, leaning down to ruffle Riley's curls. "What's up, buddy?" he asked, grinning as Riley clung to him like he'd never let go.
"'Uke! Play 'ego!" Riley said, tugging on Luke's hand, leading him eagerly to the pile of brightly coloured blocks on the carpet.
Luke shot Tori a smile over his shoulder, clearly happy to be back. She couldn't help the warm feeling that spread through her as they interacted. It was a different feeling than the one she got watching John and Riley. She wasn't sure how to explain it, but the feelings were too different to compare.
She settled onto the couch, watching as Luke dove into building towers and playing Bob the Builder with Riley. The two of them fell easily into their rhythm, Luke making exaggerated sound effects that had Riley giggling uncontrollably. Tori had never seen him so at ease with anyone except maybe his dad.
"You've got quite the builder here, Tori," Luke smiled, helping Riley to rebuild Scoop, the yellow digger. "Forget hockey. You've got a future architect."
Tori laughed, loving how natural it was having Luke there. She could picture their life together with Riley--a little family unit. He fit seamlessly into their lives. Why had she ever had doubts about him? Why had she let herself get in her head and sabotage something that clearly made Riley and her happy?
"Should we see how high of a tower we can build, Ri?" Luke whispered, earning a very enthusiastic nod.
"'uper tall!" Riley squeaked, handing Luke another brick. He balanced it easily, but then, with a grin, reached for Riley's nose.
"Boop! Oh no, the nose monster got you!" Luke declared, making Riley shriek. "We better protect our noses!"
Riley threw his hands over his face, giggling as Luke chased him around the room. When he finally caught him, he scooped him up, spinning him in the air as Riley erupted into laughter. Tori had never heard him laugh so hard in his life.
"'Gain! 'Gain!"
Luke raised his eyebrows, pretending to consider it. "Hmm... I don't know. I might be too tired. Unless..." He gave Tori a playful glance. "Unless Mama helps us with our super-duper high tower!"
"'Elp us, Mama! 'Elp us!"
Tori laughed, sliding down next to them, joining in the building with mock-seriousness. "Alright, team. Let's make the tallest tower ever."
They spent the next half-hour building, laughing, and toppling their creation over and over. Eventually Riley snuggled up to Luke, yawning with a sleeply smile, clearly ready for a nap.
"Nap time, Ri?" Tori asked, standing up and brushing off her jeans.
"No 'tank 'oo."
"Wasn't really a question, bubba. It's nap time."
"I don' know," he shrugged, snuggling closer to Luke.
Luke chuckled, looking up at Tori. "Someone's found a new nap spot."
Tori shook her head, smiling as she crouched back down beside them. "This is maybe the second ever time he's not wanted a nap," she teased.
Riley grinned sleepily, his eyeslids drooping. "Nap 'Uke," he mumbled, pressing his face into Luke's shoulder.
"Looks like you've become the favourite... again."
"What can I say? I build a mean tower," Luke said, gently adjusting Riley. "He's a special kid."
"He is," she whispered. "Thanks for being here... with us."
He reached out, giving her hand a loving squeeze. "Wouldn't have it any other way."
~~
Tori was on the phone with John, pacing around the living room while Luke and Riley happily played with his toys on the floor. Luke's laugh echoed through the room as Riley squealed, but her attention was on listening to John's request.
"Look, Tori, I know it's last minute, but I need to switch weekends with Riley. My brother can't come another time, but I'll take Ri next week to make up for it. I promise."
Tori bit her lip, looking at Luke who was obliviously helping Riley with his game. Next weekend was the first free weekend that Luke had and they were planning an outing to the aquarium. Riley hadn't been since he was one and Tori wanted to see if he'd still love it as much as he did then.
"John, next weekend's... kind of important," she said, hoping he'd understand without pushing. "We have plans."
"I get it, Tori, but I wanna spend time with my brother, it'd be hard with--"
"Maybe you should've thought of that before we had a child, John. I--"
"I'm asking you to switch one weekend, Tori. It's not that deep."
After a long pause, Tori sighed. "Fine. We'll work it out."
She ended the call and sat down, watching Riley climb into Luke's lap, his face lit up as he explained the latest addition to his Playmobil pirate-ship. Luke looked up, noticing Tori spacing-out.
"What's up?" he asked, setting Riley on the floor next to him, the toddler still babbling away.
"John needs to switch weekends," Tori said, trying to keep her tone neutral. "I... it would mean Riley would go to his next weekend instead of this one."
Luke's face fell, though he quickly masked it. "Ah, okay. I know you were looking forward to next weekend, but shit happens, V," he said with a small smile, though there was disappointment in his eyes. "It's gonna be fine. I mean, I can cancel shit with Z and Jack this w--"
"You're not cancelling on hanging out with your friend for us. We'll reschedule. I... I want you to be there with us. A little family outing, but you didn't sign up to cancel shit with Jack."
"Tori, I know what I signed up for. And I'm here for both of you. Z and Jack will understand."
"Nope. No way. You're not cancelling. John--"
Luke sighed.
"What?" Tori's brow furrowed.
"Just... sometimes it's hard knowing that because John's in Riley's life... he'll always be in yours too."
"I know it's not ideal, but... you're not a second choice. I promise."
"I know, V. I know. I--"
"Mama! 'Uke! Pirate! Arrr!!! 'Uke, 'oo play now?"
"One second, bud. Just let me finish talking to Mama."
"Everything is gonna be fine, Tori. We'll figure this out. Don't let it stress you out. I love you."
"I love you too, Luke."
"'Uke!"
"I'm coming, Ri! Let's see your pirates!"
Tori sighed, running a hand through her greasy hair. She had been looking forward to John's weekend. She was going to take a nice shower, clean the house, binge some TV and drink a few glasses of wine. Now... she was gonna have to take a babywipe shower and pray she didn't fall asleep in the middle of the day.
~~
Luke was packing up his gear when he noticed John lingering by his stall. It was unusual for them to end up alone together, but everyone else had already cleared out. Luke hesitated, but nodded in John's direction, signaling he was ready for whatever conversation John wanted to start.
John approached, hands tucked in his pockets. "Hey, Luke. Got a minute?"
"Sure," he replied, setting down his bag. He straightened, unsure of where this was going.
John shifted, looking uncomfortable but determined. "I just... I wanted to say that I appreciate how you've been with Riley. He talks about you a lot, and Tori said he's clearly happy when you're around. I can see it too."
"Thanks, John. Means a lot. Riley's a great kid, and I care a lot about him."
John nodded. "Look, I'll admit, it hasn't really been easy watching another guy take on such an important role in my son's life. But it's obvious Riley looks up to you. And I don't want him to feel like he has to choose between us, y'know?"
"Trust me, I don't want that either," Luke said sincerely. "You're his dad. I'm never gonna try to take your place. But I also want to be there... for both of them."
A silence hung between them, a final mutual understanding. Finally, John cleared his throat. "I think as long as we're both on the same page... for good, that's what matters. Riley deserves to have people that care about him. And I see that you really do."
"Absolutely. I'm here for both of them, but I respect your role in his life."
John extended his hand, and Luke firmly grasped it, both of them nodding. This was it. Peace at last. They finally had made peace. And Luke felt a renewed sense of purpose. Riley and Tori were his family. And he'd support and protect them, no matter what.
~~
Tori was scrolling through her phone, her half-eaten bowl of cereal forgotten in front of her. Riley was at John's and she was finally getting a moment to hereslf.
"Hey," Luke said, sliding in the room, looking... oddly calm.
Hey," she placed her phone down. "What's up?"
"I had a chat with John the other day," he began.
Tori swore her heart stopped beating for a second. "Oh?"
"Yeah. It was... it was good. We talked about Riley, about us. And we, uh, we finally seem to be on the same page."
"Wait? Really?" She couldn't believe that John had been so mature about it. "That's amazing, Luke! I'm so happy to hear that."
"I know. It feels good. Like the weight has been lifted off us."
Tori nodded, returning to her cereal. "Thanks for doing that, Lu. For all of us."
"Anytime, V. Anytime."
~~
Luke wasn't used to activities that involved lots and lots of excited children, so he couldn't help but feel a little out of place at the aquarium. He watched as kids ran around, their voices echoing through the dimly lit rooms, poiting at fish and pressing their faces against the glass.
Riley, who was practically vibrating with excitement, darted ahead, running as quickly as his little feet would take him. "'Ook! 'Uke, 'ishies!" he squealed, his face lighting up at the sight of a massive tank full of colourful, tropical fish.
Luke laughed, crouching down beside him. "Ya see that big one over there, Ri? I think it's giving you the stink-eye," he whispered conspiratorially, making Riley giggle. They stayed there, noses pressed to the glass, Riley's hand clutching Luke's while Tori trailed behind, smiling at how perfectly they fit together.
Riley pointed at an orange clownfish. "Nemo!" he declared proudly, looking up at Luke for confirmation.
"Yep, that's Nemo! And what about that one?" he pointed to a tiny, darting blue fish.
"Dowy!"
Tori joined them, her hand brushing Luke's shoulder as she knelt beside them. "Expert fish spotter Riley Marino. I like the sound of that. What about you, Ri-Ri?"
"Wiley Mawino!"
"Yes! That's you!"
They moved through the exhibits, Riley darting between tanks, his awe palpable. Luke and Tori held hands, exchanging smiles as they watched Riley live his best life.
"We should do this more often," Luke suggested, squeezing Tori's hand.
"You think?"
"Duh! This is so much better than sitting around and playing 'chel with Jack all day."
Tori cackled, "Luke!"
"Just telling the truth. Love you, V," he turned, pressing a kiss to the side of her head.
"Love you more, Lu."
~~
"You want me to meet your family?" Tori asked, trying to make sure she had heard Luke correctly.
"That's what I said."
"Luke..."
"I know, I know. It's a big step, but I know everyone would love you and Riley. It's a good chance for him to hang with new people."
"Meeting you family is... big. Like life-changing big."
"I know it's a big deal, but I wouldn't ask if I wasn't sure. Plus it's just a few days at the lake, nothing intense. My mom will eat up the time with a toddler. I think she's been secretly waiting for a grandchild."
Tori laughed, adjusting the sleeping toddler on her lap. "I... can I have some time to think about it? It'd be our first vacation together and my first time with your family. That's..."
"You've got all the time you need, Tori. Jack, Q, and I spend like most of the summer there, so any weekend that works for you... we'll make it happen."
"Deal."
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beef-brisket · 3 days ago
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Lucifer was completely blissed out. He swore that he could hear Adam calling to him.
He shuddered as he felt a hand stroke his cheek. It felt so real. It couldn't be, surely. Adam was busy.
Adam: What did you do to yourself, I haven't see you like this in weeks~.
Lucifer squinted and looked at who never was here. They were so golden.
Lucifer: ...Adam? I thought you were with Charlie...
Adam: I was. But we finished. The security system will be set up tomorrow, and Vox will be meeting with Charlie to discuss the advertising.
Lucifer started to see red: Vox? Alone with my daughter!?
Adam: Of course not, Lu. She wanted to handle this on her own, but I insisted that at least one of us be with her.
Lucifer: It'll be me. I won't have you near him, Adam. No way.
Adam: I can more than handle Vox, Luci. The only reason I didn't stop him was because of our deal. If he tried anything, I'm more than capable of crushing his pixels.
Lucifer: Pixels? Balls?
Adam laughed: No, pixels. His screen.
Lucifer: Ah. Right. I still don't want him trying anything.
Adam: You're welcome to join us. I'm sure Charlie would love your input.
Adam sat on the bed next to Lucifer: I'm sorry if I've been a bit distant... that hour with Vox has affected me more than I thought it would...
Lucifer: You haven't been distant, Adam. You've been protecting yourself. I completely understand.
Adam: Thank you... I didn't want you to think I don't... want us anymore. You've done so much for me- you're one of the most important people in my life. I can't thank you enough.
Lucifer sat up and softly cupped Adams face, kissing his forehead: You don't need to thank me. It was my pleasure to free you from her.
Adam blushed and leaned into Lucifer's hands: I was wondering if... why am I so nervous? I was wondering if I could take you out.
Lucifer: With a sniper rifle or on a date?
Adam laughed, smacking Lucifer's shoulder: Not with a gun! On a date! I want to take you to one of my favorite restaurants. Maybe a walk and finally... I'd like to take you to my home... my first home- my radio tower.
Lucifer: I haven't been on a date before...
Adam: I refuse to believe that... the Queen never took you out? Showed you off?
Lucifer blushed: I was the one to show her off... there isn't much about me worth showing, Adam.
Adam: Enough! Fuck her and whatever she's done to make you feel that way about yourself. She's a horrible woman, Lu. I won't let you speak lies about yourself. Even if you believe them. You're fantastic. Let me show you. Let me show Hell the one who's most important to me. Let me love you, Lucifer. You deserve it.
Lucifer felt himself tear up. He wanted to go out with Adam so badly. But how long would it take for him to see how much of a mistake being with him is? Lilith left after thousands of years. How long will it take Adam?
He jumped when Adam lowered Lucifer to the bed and wrapped his arms around him, holding Lucifer close.
Adam: Don't doubt your worth, Lucifer. Say yes. Let me show you how special you are. I'll love it more than anything. Please, Lu. Let show you love.
Lucifer started to cry in Adam's chest. He wanted that so badly. More than anything.
Lucifer: P-Please, Addy. S-Show me.
Adam: Gladly~.
Lowkey want an au where Adam has Alastors' powers.
The tentacles
The eyes
The changing size
The shadows
The sass
The deal making
Him owning Husk and Nifty
The musical numbers
The radio control
The tentacles- have I mentioned that before?
The rivalry with Lucifer
Maybe he replaces Alastor entirely. No Alastor. Only Adam. It's always been Adam.
Thanks for coming to my tedtalk.
Only Adam lol This is good! His Husk and Nifty could be Lute and Peter.
He doesn't have to smile all the time does he?
Yessss, and he plays rock instead of jazz lol And yes of course there is a rivalry lol
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