#I am so bad at receiving compliments sorry if im awkward Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[pavlov-sdog]

I'm glad to have a such amazing person as a no.1 Bell's fan. Love your ramblings, pls never stop

aahh thank you!! I honestly did not expect anyone to care about my rambling at all :’)

[hannahlovesluca]

here for your matchups!! take your time <33 thank youu!!

(male please!!)

Gender: Male

Pronouns: he/him

Sexuality: mlm, demi

Zodiac: aquarius

Appearance: black messy hair just around the shoulder, wolfcut ish? kinda jellyfish? round glasses! black eyes, pale skin, androgynous-ish? average (thin leaning) proportions

Mbti: enfp

Personality: energetic, hyper and unhinged, audhd central, hyperfocused but also hyperdistracted, fun silly guy, but also kinda stubborn, will act all mighty but crumble onto the floor at one sweet or flirtatious deed

Likes: animals!! cats, dogs, parrots, ducks, birds ingeneral, sharks...etc. sweets, noodles, sushi, i love all food actually, but i love seafood the most, animanga, psychology <3

Dislikes: any bugs with more than 8 legs, bitter food, awkward silence

Love Language;

Giving: PHYSICAL TOUCH (hugs and kisses loml). quality time, gift (diy made cause i enjoy art)

Receiving: any but hopefully quality time included :D

Extra: i am bad with cooking 😔 multilingual! (korean, english, japanese but not fluently) bad at keeping a poker face ngl.. i have a bichon frise named tofu and he is adorable. insane rambler, can talk for hours without stop because im a victim of the 'tism

once again, thank you <33

i pair you with…

Mysta Rias!

hear me out…

• you guys both suck at cooking. (one more than the other…) which leads to a shit ton of dates!!!

• whether those dates be spent at home w/ doordash or at a fancy restaurant you wanted to try out!!

• mysta loves how well you guys mesh because you’re just so similar in the fact that you’re unhinged, loud, etc yet so introverted

• he loves complimenting you!!! because of your reactions!!!

• and yes his love language is physical touch (tell me why i tried to spell physical with an F..)

• and that inevitably leads to him being all over you!! if hes streaming and he feels xtra nervous he will definitely keep his hand on your thigh and squeeze it now and then <3

• omg imagine him playing a horror game and having to latch onto you because hes so scared

• loves that you can speak so many languages!!! its so exhilarating to him when he hears it roll off your tongue!! <33

• sorry this was so short!!! im extremely sick!!! 🤒

RUNNERS UP: Hex Haywire, Platonic!Millie Parfait

[what-if-nct]

hey joyce, how have you been lately? i hope you are doing well. i haven’t managed to get any asks in lately because my life has been really overwhelming, in good and bad ways. i finally got back to in person classes after being virtual for 2 - 3 years, so no more loneliness and isolation, but me having social anxiety and being introverted has kinda stunted me from going “out there” socially. i did make a few new friends tho :) *pt 1*

since the school year is wrapping up i have finals this and next week, and i am so burnt out i can’t even function properly, like this morning, i went to wrong class all the way across campus, but i was unsure if i had that class so i went back to my dorm, then stirred up the courage to go ask, only find out i was in the wrong class, so i had to walk across campus (again) to get to the right class. i did get clowned for that by my friends, but i love them anyways. *pt 2*

also i found out i’m pan, not bi because of this new nonbinary kid in one of my classes that i might have a crush on. they complimented my digital art, and said they dabbled in it too, and i’m falling so hard. i want to get to know them better before confessing tho. (sorry for so many parts, the ask box will only let me type so much) *pt 3*

i think my depression has gotten better, at least that’s what my therapist told me, and from all the walking ive been doing, i gotten in better shape, so less body insecurities, yay! this month has been a whirlwind for me,(im kinda being dramatic here) but i'm so glad my life has changed for the better. thanks for hearing me out. feel free to get anything you need to off of your chest, or just tell hhow things have been lately. be well! -🌿

I'm so happy to hear your doing better and since it's been a few years since you've been in in person classes it's understandable, it's your first time out in the world since the unfortunate events occured. But I'm sure as you get more comfortable being back around people. it'll get a little easier to be more social. I'm so sorry to hear you've been burnt out. Just breath and remember you're almost there and you'll have a whole summer to destress and hang out with all your new friends and even make more. And yes being friends first will also make any connection even stronger. And I hope everything continues to get better for you.

And I'm fine. I actually talked to a boy on the phone in the first time in a long time. And I was just giggling, curled in a ball on my couch. And he's cute and really sweet and a weird mix of the type of guys I attract. Like sweet awkward gentle anime nerd and the straight forward only here for one thing. It's interesting! He looks like Brandon from Prettymuch. Honestly in Miami the members of Prettymuch represent the dating pool here. I always end up with a Brandon, Nick and for sure an Austin. Speaking of Prettymuch I always forget they have a song with NCT Dream, pretty much about getting consent, it's beautiful. There should have been an mv cause it didn't get the recognition it deserves. Also I watched Pam & Tommy on Hulu and couldn't finish it. one, the way Pamela is betrayed just doesn't feel right. It made me angry how the actress portrayed her. Also what's with current media and the unnecessary penises I am not a prude at all. Trust me. Every Snapchat I receive is a penis I see them everyday. But like why the fuck was it talking!? And Pam didn't want any part of it that should have stopped me but I was curious. I couldnt finish it. Yo I once met a guy who looked just like Logan Paul but with brown hair. But he liked feet.....I'm not proud of that moment of my life. I'm also ashamed I know the lyrics to everyday bro. Not Logan's songs though he knows how to make catchy songs don't judge me. I could not keep a single train of thought. Im sorry. It's really nice to hear that despite some harder things you're doing really well. I'm so happy for you.

[stevenrogers5-blog]

University S.L.U.T 4

Summary: Steve isn’t usually the one to hate or judge people. But when it came to you, he just wanted to rip his hair out. So his dismay, you two are partnered for a class project. Can you change his mind in time to get a good grade? Or will his feelings get the best of him?

Warnings: You know how it is by now... I promise it gets spicy soon! 

Part 3 and Part 5

A/N: I am soo happy that so many of you are really liking this series!!! It really means alot to me!

With your hair up in a bun and your body wrapped up in an over-sized sweater. You were content to be in your dorm. After Steve being an ass once again, you just needed to relax tonight.You didn’t want to see a single person and did not want to leave your dorm. Sadly, Emma had other plans for you. As you unzip your bag, the door comes flying open. You wipe your head around and are met with an annoyed Emma and Bucky.

“What the hell happened to you guys?” You ask as you push your glasses up your the bridge of your nose.

“You wear glasses?!” Bucky asks as he smiles at you.

“Yes. I do. Now why are you two here?” You ask.

“Well. Steve didn’t want us there because we were being too loud. We were just trying to work on our project.” Emma explains as she places her bag on the floor next to her bed.

“Not even surprised. It is Steve after all. He always thinks he’s in the right for things he can’t even educated himself on properly.” You mumble as you sit down on the edge of your bed.

“I don’t know. Maybe you can go over, Y/N? Bring him coffee and offer to work on the project. It’s his main focus and he shouldn’t really be working on it without his partner anyways.” Bucky explains as he plops down on Emma’s bed.

“Yeah. It also gives Bucky and i chance to work on ours.” Emma smiles as she grabs Bucky’s hand. You shake your head as you know what she really wants to do with him.

“You seriously want me to go over there? When you two just came back from there? Ranting and raving that he’s being a total asshole right now?” You ask.

“Please Y/N. I really would like to spend some time with Bucky. Plus this give you guys a chance to maybe get to know each other better? Call him out for his bad attitude and talk it out.” Emma says as she sits on her bed. You sigh as you eye her and Bucky.

“Fine.” You say as you rezip your bag. You move to your coffee maker and make two big to go cups off coffee. You turn to see Bucky and Emma already making out. “At least let me leave first!”

“Fine!” Emma whines as she pulls away from Bucky. You rush to pull your fuzzy socks on. You grab your bag, pulling it over your shoulders. You take the two cups and walk out of the door. Emma closing it behind you.

You sigh as you reach the door to your unwanted enemy. You kick it lightly since your hands are full. You hear some stumbling and are soon greeted by Steve. An annoyed glare comes over his face.

“Bucky told me you were annoyed at them. Then they kicked me out of my dorm. So i brought coffee and my help so we can work on project?” You explain. He looks you up and down and takes note at how he liked you in lazy attire. Leggings, a massive college sweater, fuzzy socks, and your hair in a messy bun. He wondered what you would look like in his sweatshi- NO STOP THINKING ABOUT HER LIKE THAT!!!

“Fine. Maybe you can redeem yourself from earlier” He says, opening the door wider. You walk in and instantly take in how much more cleaner it is than you would expect from two soccer playing, college boys. “Since i’m already set up on my desk, you can take my bed.” You place his coffee cup down on his desk.

“Okay.” You sigh, fixing your glasses. You hop onto his bed and scoot back till you hit the wall.

“I didn’t know you wore glasses…” Steve says as you pull out your laptop.

“Not most people do. I have been wearing glasses since i was born and contacts since the third grade. I don’t typically wear my glasses. Makes me look like a hipster librarian in my opinion.” You answer, shrugging as you flip your laptop open.

“Well, i like them on you. They fit your face nicely.” Steve compliments. You look up at him with questioning look before smiling.

“Well um thank you. Didn’t think i would ever receive a compliment from you.” You mumble as bring your coffee cup to your lips. You take a sip and sigh contently.

“Be thankful. No one ever really gets them from me. Unless you’re Natasha. Or Wanda.” Steve says as he takes a seat at his desk.

“Yeah. At least they live upto your expectations of being perfect. Which im completely surprised.” You mumble the last part. He sighs and looks at you.

“Look. Can we just work and not talk?” He asks.

“Whatever.” You sigh, rolling your eyes. He turns back to his desk and gets to scrolling through an article. You both sit in awkward silence as you both type a little here and there. Finally after about a good 10 minutes you decide you can’t handle it anymore. “What did i ever do to you?”

“Seriously? Did you not hear me?” Steve asks, anger and annoyance already evident in his voice.

“Yes. And i think you should apologize for being so rude. And for earlier today. I don’t know what you think you know about me. But it’s very unfair to me for you treat me like crap just because you think you’re better than me.” You spit out at him, slamming your laptop shut.

“I don’t think, i know i am. At least i don’t go around, giving myself to just anyone like it’s nothing. Then leave my boyfriend hanging and act like i didn’t just hurt him. Being a slut isn’t pretty Y/N. Remember that.” Steve yells back, slamming his laptop shut as well. You scoff as you scoot closer to the edge of his bed.

“Listen. I don’t know what Sams been telling you or anyone on the team. But i am not a Slut! I didn't just go around giving myself away. As a matter a fact it’s the opposite. Have you ever talked to his new girlfriend?! She will happily tell you how she stole him from me. Took him away because she’s better looking and what he really wants in a woman. So before you go listening and agreeing with someone’s side of the story, maybe listen to the other persons.” Hot tears were forming and dropping down your face. “I gave that man my whole heart for three years! And for him to go around and tell everyone that i was the one cheating! It’s bullshit!”

Steve sits silently as he watches you cry harder. He sighs as he regrets saying anything to you about Sam. You wipe away the tears, trying to force them away as the wounds of the messy breakup rip open.

“I think i’m going to go.” You mumble as you turn around and start shoving things back into your bag. Steve stands up and reaches for your arm.

“No. Don’t. Please. I’m sorry Y/N.” He says as he tries to stop your hands from shoving another item into your bag.

“Stop. Let me leave. I don’t want to be here. And now i just.. Why would you say that?! How low do you have to go to make someone feel so miserable about something they’ve cried over for so many nights. Someone who wondered what they did wrong to lose someone they thought was going to be their husband. You and your team of terrible men can shove it.” You push his hands away. You shove your computer into your bag and zip it up. You grab your coffee cup and head to his door.

“Y/N. Seriously. Please stay. We need to work on this project.” Steve says as he grabs for your bag, trying to pull you back into the room.

“Seriously Steven. You were supposed to be one of the good ones. Guess everyone was wrong. Guess i got my information from an unreliable source.” You rip your bag from his hands and slam his door in his face. You stand there for a second as you look at your horribly shaking hands.

Tag List:

@frackinawesomeninja @autumnlovebaby @i-love-marching-band @philosophies-angst @patzammit @buckyhoneyno @sprinkleofpoop @falling-stars-never-cry @bvbamygirl-blog @cadence-jeannette @lilypalmer1987 @fandomlover03 @destielinamoose 

[flying-weirdo]

Hey, same anon from before, by "1-45" i meant all the questions lol, im such a creep but i really love you and you're blog :))

Ah shit, sorry anon! But thank you for asking and for the compliment! Glad someone enjoys the mess that is this blog.

[the ask meme]

1: What’s the most annoying thing about your best friend/s?

[answered]

Hmm, I started spending a lot more time alone ever since highschool started and now I feel like they would judge me for every tiny thing that I do but I guess that’s more my fault.

2: Least favorite TV shows anime? [since I mostly watch anime]

[answered]

I cannot stress enough how much I hated Elfen Lied because of how little sense it made. You have a great concept, interesting characters and then you throw a shithead of a protagonist in there and fuck everything up BIG TIME

3: Favorite moment with your best friend/s?

I started the year absolutely awful. First months were hell and I was feeling like the last shit on earth. And I just went out with my friends one night and I can’t express how relieved and happy I was, especially realizing that they actually missed me after not hanging out with them after a long time because of a health problem.

4: What’s one quality you would like to have?

I’d like to be smarted, prettier and draw better

5: Name three people of your same sex you would: marry,kiss and fuck

Since I am anime weeb shit

Marry: Uraraka [bnha]

Kiss: Himiko Toga [is this bad-it would be]

Fuck: Momo

6: Do you like your full name?

Yes, actually yes. Kind of weirs but I like it.

7: Tell me your most embarrasing memory

Oh god…

I went to a birthday party where I knew literally no one other than the one who invited me. So I tried to introduce myself to some of the people, maybe start talking to some and I can tell you there was especially one awkward introduction where neither of us knew what to do, it was awful… Not to mention that the whole night I stayed on a chair and talked with friends or stayed on tumblr while everyone was dancing…

Ugggghhhhhh

8: Favorite color to wear?

[answered]

Black, blue and gray

9: Favorite restaurant?

I honestly rate restaurants based on how good the pasta is there and so far there is a restaurant in the capital of my country called Capri that have absolutely amazing past 

10: What would be a good first date for you?

Hmmm hard to tell. Probably going to a cafe and talking about random stuff then going for a walk

11: Are you a good wrestler?

…probably not…

12: Are you allergic to something?

Nope. I used to be allergic to dust when I was little

13: Would you be a good singer?

I am absolute shit at singing 

14: Who’s the last person you told “I love you” to?

My mom

15: What car would you buy if you had enough money?

Pffft I have no idea. I like my parents’ one

16: Favorite cover of a song?

Panick at the disco - Bohemian rhapsody 

17: What was your last conversation about?

Eragon [the books]

18: Where were you born?

In the small city I still live in, in a weird country called Romania

19: Least favorite app?

the ones that crash after getting them lol

20: Tell me two facts about your country of birth

They made a contest asking people to design the logo of our capital. The first to logos have been found to be stolen.

The capital used to be called “Little Paris”

Extra fun fact: Best mountains

21: Do you like wearing sunglasses?

Yes, sometimes but I don’t currently own any

22: When it’s a good moment for a first kiss?

After deciding you want to be a in a relationship with that person

23: What are your nationalities?

I’m just… romanian

24: What would make you drop college/university?

Realizing that I made a mistake taking that course 

25: A crossover between two shows (any shows) you would like to see?

[answered] 

Oooh I really have no idea. Honestly Boku no hero academia and the world of Eragon [books] are somewhat similar in some aspects and I’ve been wanting to draw a crossover AU for those 2 for some time now.

26: Long or short hair?

Just as crazy as possible 

27:A character from a book/TV show/movie that shouldn’t have died?

ISLANZADY FROM ERAGON, NOPE, BRING HER BACK

28: Favorite movie scene?

Deadpool - the last scene when he starts playing WHAM

29:Do you ship more fiction people or more real people?

I only ship fictional people, shipping real people is kind of weird for me

30: Favorite country song?

Bo Burnham - Country song 

31: Favorite John Green book?

None

32: Least favorite Ed Sheeran song?

Thinking out loud

33: Favorite ship?

KiriBaku

34: How do you deal with sexual tension?

35: Name a celebrity who died that you miss

I wasn’t even born when he died but o boy would I have loved to see Freddie Mercury alive

36: Favorite Harry Potter spell?

Haven’t seen the movies, didn’t read the books

37: Something you are scared of losing?

My cat

38: Someone you regret meeting?

One or 2 of my classmates 

39: Have you ever been hurt by someone you thought he/she was your friend?

No, not really

40: Do you easily open up to people?

Not quite

41: What is a gift you love receiving?

All the manga volumes of BnHA [which might come true] or the whole Inheritance Cycle [Eragon] 

42: What is something you could leave easily?

Highschool

43: Rant about that’s eating you up

……Endeavour…….. and how I feel like I have no time to live my teenagehood

44: If you could make one phone call to anyone right now, who would it be and what would you say?

one friend and we would just talk garbage about random stuff

45:Are you easy to love?

[answered]

Not at all. I don’t want to get involved in any kind of relationship since I will probably move from where I live now and I need to focus on studying and school right now and a relationship would take too much time so I’m just staying away from things like that thought having a crush or someone to love might be nice…

And I’m a total weirdo with a constant need of validation on top of that so nope,not really easy to love

[survivorinternational]

Episode 2 - "I couldn't believe I heard God wrong the third time" - Sluggy

Jacob: I have no idea for the video Me: I have an idea Jacob: its shit oh okay... give us a better idea before you shut mine down would you? 

So for the past 2 days ever since we won the reward challenge and got the chance to get a clue to the hidden immunity idol, the info had been passed around among everyone in the tribe that it was on the beach. I was waiting for the next opportunity to search for the idol because I know everyone's gonna go for it, and today I was busy beforehand and couldn't search for it until 4 hours after the challenge. But the first day I came here God told me specifically it was at the beach and in the headlands, it just wasn't on the cliff. So i go there and search and search and i cant find it, and im about to give up... 

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...and something falls on my lap, I open it up and here it is. The hidden immunity idol. I couldn't believe I heard God wrong the third time. HAHA! I'm so grateful for this. After all the Asians having idols in the psst seasons of survivor man. 

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So this sucks but I have to keep this idol as hidden as possible even from my closest allies. It's gonna be a big target on my back and if its possible i dont want to use it all the way until the final time I can use it. So even though Michael and Jacob asked about it, I couldn't tell him and err I don't want to lie anymore so it's definitely tough :( Whatever it is I have to keep humble and continue to stay under the radar. 

This challenge will take a lot of confidence which I completely lack but I will do my best and everything what I am asked to. I am kinda pressuring Vilma into being the director/editor of this since I know she is into stuff like this but I might have put too much pressure. Will try to work something out better in that regard. 

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Ginger's constant bullying of the ghost of Emils will get him into deep shit.

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This challenge has been a real coller coaster for me. I hate filming myself in videos but seeing the confidence Vilma (and others) have is really inspiring. We are doing "Toy" by Netta which is a pretty fun song to lipsync to. I am not the best but I am having fun with it and getting some exercise in the meanwhile. I will still undoubtebly hate any of my bits but at least I have the courage to participate and do my best. 

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About hour of recording myself. I shall not edit it from a cringy mess into a slightly less cringy mess. Wish me luck.

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I do not know if it is because I am slightly slick but I am editing my clips into a more coherent structure and my stomach genuinely hurts from cringe

A week in and I received my 1st message from Dean/Dylan :D how lucky. I also have slightly more newfound time coming up in the next few days so I can spend more time building trust with Tyler, Stephen and Dean/Dylan

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I just saw Tyler's part in the music video. How can 1 man be that hot. Like wtf did he do to get those kinds of genetics. I'm so fucking jealous rn. This confessional will contain no actual substance, just me shit posting about how fuxking AWESTRUCK I am at this man. Go to 2:15 of our music video to see... Damn! 

Right so this day was um interesting. I highly doubt i'll cover all the boring ass t but watevs. Ok SO, we had our first cheeky little game talk with Michael who much to my recent surprise is like 33 years old. pop off grandpa. Love him tho. So we had a fun little chat about who we liked, highkey like Stephan the most but didnt want to say that cause he had already said Stephan seems distant, so i pretended i was chill with other people just to be fun :). ANYWAY, he wants to create a majority with Jacob and Dean but honestly like no, those kids r the REAL crackheads. I want to work with Sluggy and Stephan so it was a tee bit awkie for me. But i smiled and waved anyway cause thats ALL im good at. If Michael was to try and create a majority with those 4 i'd highkey flip 🤭. Dean was just... how to put this... slop, and im not having slop in my house MY APOLOGIES. While planning for the challenge he was annoying and then throughout the challenge he was annoying. OK SO i am NOT mean and this challenge is clearly AWKWARD for everyone and everyone is being out there BUT deans video... like i used two seconds of it. Im sorry my love i dont know how to introduce that pillow possession story line into the video... . I think half way through he needed a nap? and started having night terrors, geez i hope he's ok. RIGHT anyway. I finished the video, i hope my editing and also telling everyone that they're part was really helpful and easily the best will grant me safety regardless! O also Jacob told me the idol clue BUT i dont know whether to believe it or not   :((( so he says its at the beach, im like well what was the actual clue? was it cryptic? then he said 'you inhaled smoke and it was hidden there' wtf u mean THAT was the clue. Absolutely not, get that SLOP out of MY face. RIGHT but i looked at the beach anyway to NO PREVAIL. Michael and Jacob both told me where they looked tho ;) Throwback to last confessional where i didnt think i was making an in roads with people, well i THINK i could be much better off now! Jacob says he only really talks to Stephan which is GOOD because i want Dean out and i thought he was close to dean. Also Jacob starting having game talk to me which was a HOOT because i thought he DIDNT like me. obviously my piercing eyes got the better of him. Im close with Stephan, Jacob, Michael and the singaporian one. OOPS thats all of the tribe but Dean. I've been whip whop wheaving my way through these relationships as best i can and forcing myself onto people without them realising. All i need is 1 or 2 STRONG connections and ill smile :) O also Jacob said i was hot and asked if i was single! LOVELY, amazing LOVE compliments, will use this child if need be but if he's trying to use me, sucks for him because im self conscious and DONT believe his compliments anyway. I THINK im setting myself up in a mildly good position, just gonna be more pal'y. I hope people LIKE me. 

We gave our best but our Basic White Boy music video is totally gonna lose, and I’m taking some responsibility for that too. I knew we should’ve chosen something gayer.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1KBaGOCmiwLknXyQoaaeyqZ0isdVOFUV2/view here are my clips :eyes:

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I am not saying I am aiming for it, but I am totally aiming for most confessionals. So fun story here. Whole summer not a single time I was bitten by a mosquito. Then this survivor starts. What is survivor known for? Tropical islands with mosquitos and such. So I was riding my bicycle yesterday and sat on a bench for a bit to rest up. 5 minutes. I sat for 5 minutes on this damn bench. 7 mosquito bites all on my legs, 3-4 split. I was fuming. Apparently that opened the pandora's box of mosquitos because I have been bitten 4 more times since them. I am full of hate. In other news: http://prntscr.com/od5qry This is really nice to see. Vilma's the best <3

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I CAN'T STOP TYPING IN ALL CAPS OUR VIDEO IS SO GOOD HOLY SHIT

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my life is now a meme 

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oh wait it already was

CURRENTLY FREAKING OUT BECAUSE!!!!!!!!! IM EDITING THE MUSIC VIDEO BUT LIKE I HAVE SUCH LIMITED TIME!!!!! I ALSO HAVE TO BE FORTY FIVE MINUTES AWAY FROM MY CURRENT LOCATION IN AN HOUR AND THAT MAKES I ONLY HAVE FIFTEEN MINUTES TO EDIT WHICH I DEFINITELY CANNOT FINISH IN TIME. ALSO HAVING HUGE FUCKING PROBLEMS BECAUSE MY OLD METHOD OF DOWNLOADING VIDEOS IS NOT WORKING!!!!!!!!!!! AND IM REALLY FREAKING OUT ABOUT IT LOL SO IM SCREEN RECORDING OUR VIDEOS BUT I ALSO DON'T HAVE THE ACTUAL AUDIO FOR AMERICAN BOY AND IM STRUGGLING TO DOWNLOAD IT I MIGHT NEED TO BUY IT ON MY PHONE LIKE FUCK FJLKDJASLKFAJDSKL THIS IS SO DIFFICULT AND IM TRYING TO KEEP IT TO MYSELF INSTEAD OF WORRYING MY TRIBE MATES BUT OMG WHY I HATE MY LIFE 

I feel so guilty that I didn’t help my tribe with this challenge, I really hope we win! If we don’t win honestly I will probably just tell them all they can vote me off- I hate to go without a fight but they all participated in the video and I feel like it would be the fair thing to do. Hopefully we don’t have to worry about that and my tribe wins!

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Me putting my life on the line for my TRIBE? Must be the drugs this is not really in my character but I feel really bad and want them all to thrive

I spent my entire day doing that music video and I'm gonna cry if we lose and go to tribal again ughhhhhhhhhh. I really tried my best and am super proud of my tribe mates too they did a great job. I really like the video.

Yes! Another win for Ala Mai! I'm loving this tribe and loving this game! I want to get to the merge with as many of my tribe mates as possible because we all have very similar timezones so I need that in my game. 

I am so happy we won the challenge ! I offered the Toy idea but then couldn't participate myself because of real life reasons ugh. My tribe tho did an AMAZING JOB and Im glad we chose Netta 

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Ok so just now I have realized these are not the during-game published confessionals. So I'm gonna confess: I was so fucking nervous not to be able to participate in the video challenge. I wanted to take part and it's risking eviction if we lose. On the other hand, I kinda knew I would be fine even if we lost. First, I offered the song for the tribe. Second, my alliance with Vilma and Veni is controlling the tribe, I have Clash from the side and we got majority. So I'd probs be fine anyway. Glad we won tho ! 

Uh I’ve been so busy for the past few days I can’t socialise and am very worried 

Day 4: Video editing challenge. This will be fun. Make a music video. Tribe chat is just going in circles with choosing a song. Song is finally chosen, Lonely Dance. Its a strange song, would have prefered something more campy or darker but oh well. I dont have time to do a video edit, i also want to take a back seat of this challenge. Searched for idol, No luck but i now have a good list of where to look narrowed down to 3 locations. Think im going to trust Tyler more. 

http://prntscr.com/odkz7k

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idk if i made a confessional about this but holy shit Lord is in this 

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I realise I spam so many messages to people at once. Shoutout to Vilma for always replying (although slowly) to every single one

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Quiet day today, barely spoke to people. Please no swap.

Well I'm sad to go to tribal this early, but it's probably needed. I didn't like my participation in this challenge but I was really short on time, it sucks but oh well, at least Ruthie told us to vote her and hopefully it isn't a hard vote 

Whew! Thank god we won immunity. I honestly think we tried so hard so it felt nice to be recognised for that (and by we I mean those of us who actually helped out with the challenge......). Vilma worries me a bit. I really like her and she gives off a great energy but I feel like she could use that to lead a big alliance further down the line. I definitely won't be targeting her anytime soon and hopefully I can get in that alliance at some point, but she's someone to keep an eye on.

Hello this round was boring we had shitty judges yet again woo we lost immunity woo now we have to look like bad people and vote ruthie out because shes sacrificing herself woo

WE WON!!!!!! NO TRIBAL!!!!! FUCK YESSSS And the judges were so nice to me I legit almost cried I love everyone ughhhh my heart Music video challenges are so amazing I don't care if what placement I get anymore we made that video and that's all I care about really I hope we're swapping soon! 

Okay so whew I had tribal for this game and I was nommed in a BB game so it's been a busy day today! I thought I might play my idol no matter what tonight, but Ruthie has been going through some stuff and volunteered to be voted out. Unfortunately it is uneventful for the viewers and for the hosts but I hope it is nice and easy and I can save my idol for later. Also, tribe swap anyone? Idk I haven't really clicked with anyone yet...Wow my social game sucks I'm sorry hosts, give me comps I can win, ty.