#I am not immune to the beard

[damnyoucully]

Ur so real for these tags @rillils

nomad steve 🖤

[theartingace]

They are very different characters but the similarities make me laugh enough.

props to the discord for egging me on- and pointing out that Martin and Arthur would absolutely get on like a house on fire! Too polite at wrong moments and great appreciators of poetry and tea, they deserve a nice cuppa and an chin-wag!

[sensei-wus-beard]

Lou doodle before bed

[vounoura]

↳ ʟᴀᴠᴇʀɴᴀ "ʀᴇᴅ" ᴍᴇʀᴄᴀʀ ♡ ʟᴜᴄᴀɴɪꜱ ᴅᴇʟʟᴀᴍᴏʀᴛᴇ — ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴡᴀʟᴋ ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴛᴏᴏ ᴄʟᴏꜱᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇᴅɢᴇ.

[lifemod17]

currently fighting off the urge to kiss a pretty man with a beard, dark hair, and wears glasses. which. is like 90% of my type.

[du-hjarta-skulblaka]

Incredibly funny to me that Obscure Psych Horror Analysist YouTube fully stopped his 4 hour video on one single act of Inscription, halfway through to make a completely unpaid proffesional-ish ad for his local independent game store, as a thank you for letting him film some shots there

I just. I love the energy.

[thedogeveryonehates]

u know the voice actor for cromdo in bugsnax, rick zeiff, is kinda cute :3

this is very true! he also voices spike in the new tom and jerry stuff. he rocks the salt and pepper really well :3c

[knifebait]

thinking about dwalin again

[nulfaga]

all the loeb books are so effin expensive but i NEED plutarch's lives and suetonius' bio of the emperors bc it's just cover to cover "here's a strange and emotionally stunted man and here are 27 extremely salacious things he did. Ok here's another strange and emotionally stunted man. Keep up."

[buck2eddie]

also 70s nick miller

[skerplecat]

Some days you set and accomplish goals.

Some days you end up actively watching what you planned as mediocre background noise for art because Keanu Reeves looks pretty in it.

[vounoura]

I can’t believe I set out to romance a man specifically and yeah I’m insane abt him but Neve walked out the side room and I was immediately like HELLO. I cannot overstate the level to which I am abnormal about this woman. She really ‘guy looking at other girl meme’ed my ass. typical saint-ass behaviour

[lazer-screwdriver]

Very amusing the combination of me being more 👀 towards this evil sheriff than Robin Hood and the fact that he looks a good bit like Delgado!Master

[b0ytemper]

i am not immune to collective homotherium cub sentimentality but also isn’t it lovely that even though this little thing might have been alone when she died, she’s now being grieved and celebrated so passionately by thousands and thousands of people? just a little animal that only lived a few weeks. maybe her mother watched her disappear under the snow, but i’ve seen dozens of beautiful art pieces dedicated to her JUST TODAY. she’s a miracle for paleontology, biology, our understanding of evolution and the history of life on earth. papers published dedicated to describing her whiskers and her paws and her little beard. i wish there was a way to let her and her family feel how happy we are just to know she existed.

[scleroticstatue]

For the character hotness rating, for the fun of it: the current Terrafell crew (by whatever names you'd like to call them).

Atticus:

Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY.

Tall, lithe, and graceful. He's feminine enough to be considered "pretty," and he makes up for it with a sharp smirk and purring tone. Is he faking his deep voice? Yes. Is he using beauty magic to keep his hair shiny? Definitely yes. Does he have a tendency to "accidentally touch" people when he's instructing them? Absolutely. He's competent, capable, and funny when given the chance. He's not quite my type, but he's someone's and she is going to be a lucky woman.

Sock Police:

Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY

He's big, he's broad, his biceps are the size of my head. He's got a little bit of a baby face that is going to turn into an amazing jawline and cheekbones in a couple of years, and his hair is ridiculously thick. He's constantly brooding, but that just might be his eyebrows and deep set eyes, which seem black but in the sunlight turn to spiced honey and his scars might as well be tattoos for him.

Furniture Man:

Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY

He's tall, has cheekbones to cut glass, and the beard. Yes, he's a little thin and pale and his eyes might freak someone out, but he's also very mature and incredibly aware of the limits of his situation while also maintaining hope and actively trying to solve stuff, which is just attractive in and of itself.

The Doc:

Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY

He's got a vibe. With the gray hair and the gray eyes and the glasses it's definitely a Look but he's also incredibly smart and empathetic and he's definitely a person to feel safe around. My introvert tuchus is mentally sitting in the same room as him without having to say a word.

Sir Dwarf:

Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY

Okay, he's not my type because he's definitely got a dad bod and he's, well, a dwarf, but he's got the physical ability to bench press me with one hand while folding steel with his other and I am not immune to that. Plus, he's the height of chivalric respect and there's very little I could ask beyond that.

Nik:

Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY

He's also not my type, but heaven knows that's not enough. Dark skin, dark eyes, the jaw, the confidence, the laid back attitude that tempers his bulging muscles, the smile. Weak for it.

A.T.:

Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY

He has the body of a 35 year old and the soul of Distinguished Gentleman. He's wise, thoughtful, and a legit snack. His eyes can see into your soul and his aggressively generous nature hides a surprisingly cunning side that would make me bite my lip if I saw it in person (if it wasn't directed at me)

Minor characters:

E. From D.:

Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY

He's definitely in the Distinguished Gentleman phase of life. He's rocking the gray hair, eye wrinkles, and his eyes are the sparkliest blue. I'm not there yet, but give me fifteen years and I will line up.

Emperor to Be:

Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY

The curls. The lips. The nose. This man is a Greek statue in flesh. He's ambitious and aggressive and possessive, but he will take care of what is his and he is mine.

Haggard Mailman:

Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY

Okay, in my defense, he just. Didn't get the time that put into his design that other characters did, and instead of being "video game gorgeous" he's just a background character. Someone probably thinks he's cute or handsome, but he's pretty generic.

[mushroomates]

gimli headcanons:

likes doing laundry. finds it soothing

history nerd!! loves reading old tombs/biographies of his ancestors

is incredibly intelligent. beats frodo in chess. would beat gandalf but gandalf cheats. has been in a stalemate with aragorn for two and a half years.

well mannered but chooses to forgo his politeness to make a point. especially around elves.

does NOT like horses. not just riding them, which is canon, but actually dislikes the animal itself. the reasons why include (but are not limited to) :

he does not like being not on ground. he does not have a fear of heights so much as a fear of… feet not on ground. as evidenced by refusal to jump, treehouses, and well, horses

he does not like their faces. they are long and have eyes on the side like prey. gimli thinks this is deceiving as horses are very large and can kick in someone’s skull. not his skull.

gimli believes that in a one on one match with a horse, he could easily win. he has thought of several, very specific, scenarios of this and has a detailed plan of attack should this situation occur.

they so easily turned against their home for an evil overlord (read: sauron stole all the black horses from rohan) and therefore cannot be trusted. as a rule, anything that willing you let you ride it cannot be trusted. they can’t be satisfied with this life. they are plotting something.

believes he would be great at drums. it’s just hitting things hard and he’s pretty strong.

ok, another thing about horses: they are fragile to a ridiculous extent. you breath wrong and it breaks. they have bad bones and bad blood flow in their legs, and their legs are all that they’re used for. he doesn’t understand why humans invested so much time into horses when they’re genetically bad at what they are meant to do. he’d feel bad for the horses if they weren’t so awful.

drinks coffee, not tea

takes great with the up keeping of his gear. he sharpens his axes, polishes his boots, shines his armor and waxes his mustache. that’s not gear, but he takes great pride in looking groomed and caring for his belongings.

has an axe for every occasion. battle axe? do you want throwing or slashing. a day on the town? have you seen this intricately carved masterpiece that also is a weapon? digging a hole? PICKAXE. cutting a cake? how about an axe???

hates the rain because it ruins his hair and beard. also loves the rain because it ruins legolas’s hair and clothes.

will eat anything. has a great tolerance for spice. contrary to popular belief, dwarves are not shy of seasoning but are very cautious around other races in fear of poisoning their friends

will also eat some rocks. salty is his favorite (halite, hanksite, glauberite) but also likes to add chunks of chalcanthite to his food for a slightly sweet yet metalic flavor. this is also slightly (SLIGHTLY) poisonous as evidenced by sharing his trail mix with boromir

also calls dirt the “local seasoning”

will taste dirt to try and get a feeling for the land. this tells him the acidity, weather, possible wildlife, and also pisses off legolas

actaully genuinely likes the taste of dirt. (note: if you desire to eat clay/dirt that is a symptom of iron deficiency. for gimli, he eats spoonfuls of the stuff like their supplements because as a kid it was fed to him like multivitamins)

OK SO HEAR ME OUT: lack of sunlight can cause really low hemoglobin and ferritin (a blood protein that contains iron) sooo being constantly in dark caves can cause some forms of iron deficiency. because dwarves are conscious of their young, dwarf children often grow up not often being in direct sunlight.

the solution? dirt. dirt contains iron and other tasty minerals that are good for the body. charcoal has natural antioxidants. so does clay. am i saying that momma gimli (unnamed) fed her son ash and clumps of dirt? yes. also bits of broken pottery. it’s good of the immune system.

fr tho clay/dirt/charcoal are the dwarven multivitamins. you have a tummy-ache? here, have a rock. i truly believe this was scientifically proven by dwarves and only FOR dwarves (plz do not eat dirt)

fuckin loves mushrooms. has a mushroom log at home. whenever dwarves find some fungai in a cave they go feral

likes dogs. thinks it’s great that they dig holes. thinks it’s fantastic that the bury things in holes. absolutes loves when they get muddy, and then shake off all water and dirt all over you.

when he came back home with the name lockbearer, a lot of the dwarves thought it was really cool and he has some sort of elven puzzle that requires a code to unlock something. imagine their surprise when he rocks up and is like: no, even better. HAIRS. three of them.

enjoys making mudpies- made them as a kid with his cousins, (mostly with rock slurry) and continues to, even even as an adult.

made them on the fellowship with the hobbits. taught them all about the best types of dirt and the water-to-soil- ratio needed.

while cutting up slices of his pie, he offered one to boromir, who in good nature, took it, clearly thinking it was just part of the bit.

poor boromir was locked in a stalemate after gimli cut his own slice, and began eating it.

to his credit, boromir did brave a few bites, but had to stop once he nearly had a mouthful of maggots

“protein”

gimli is like crazy good at hair. can braid quickly and efficiently in elaborate styles

picked up eleven hair style techniques in lorien (quicker than legolas) and was forced to relay them to the elf through twine as there is no way he’s letting grubby elf fingers to touch his glorious mane that’s been decades in the making

would ask for a drink “on the rocks” and get slightly upset if it did not come back with actual rocks