#I am not autistic

[alexandraisyes]

hi, same anon that asked if your symptoms go away or not. no clue why I worded it like that, but I meant if you experience it worse in intervals (obviously the symptoms are always there but get more noticeable at certain times). since you've answered my (horribly worded) question already, though, I raise another question: are there any resources that aren't horrifically ableist, where I can look further into ASPD, its symptoms and how they interact with things such as autism and other cluster B disorders? I ask so I don't keep asking you circular questions like you're equipped to diagnose a stranger with a personality disorder.

Resources are far and few to come by. A lot of what I know has been through extensive interpersonal study (talking to other people with the disorder). The fact of the matter is that most people with the disorder don’t freely talk about the disorder. You can look in online forum spaces if you want, or just get lucky and meet someone with the disorder in real life or happen to get super lucky and they’re already in your friend group. I have a sociopath and a malignant narcissist in my current friend group.

Understanding neurology would also help you in understanding any disorder, because there’s plenty of research on the neurological side of ASPD. Just not a lot of the psychological side. But if you understand neurology you understand psychology (most psychologists don’t fully understand neurology, they’re two different types of medicine with far different fields).

If you’re looking for how it interacts with other cluster b disorders, you can probably find at the very least one, maybe up to ten different “influencers” who are malignant narcissists (ASPD + NPD) who talk about the disorder on varying platforms. As stereotyped as it is, narcissists do actually love to talk about themselves.

As far as how it interacts with other neurodivergencies? Just ask someone with ASPD if they have comorbid neurodivergent disorders and what it’s like. However you aren’t going to find anything on having comorbid ASPD and autism. The two physically cannot coexist on a neurological level. (Trust me, I tried, I had a misdiagnosis of autism and was trying to wrap my head around it too).

So if someone with ASPD tells you they’re also autistic they’re wrong. They either don’t have ASPD or they don’t have autism. It’s always one or the other.

This is because ASPD and ASD are both largely caused by the amygdala. In ASD the amygdala is enlarged, growing abnormally quick between 6 and 12 months old. So you aren’t actually born autistic, but you may as well be. The faster the amygdala grows during that time the more severe the symptoms are presenting and the younger the symptoms will be noticeable.

ASPD on the other handle is caused by a reduced amygdala. Deformed sounds harsh but yeah it’s basically deformed. It’s smaller than normal, with an extremely regressed growth rate.

I could potentially go into the specifics but that’s a whole other post.

And I can’t diagnose anyone, online or off, so I will never try to. However, I am a reliable resource for understanding ASPD since it quite literally plagues me. So I can at the very least answer questions about something I’m unreasonably specialized in. Especially when the majority people in the psychiatric field of medicine aren’t specialized in it at all and there’s not enough genuine research for them to fake it either. And unfortunately most people aren’t willing to have compassion for things they don’t understand.

[greater-than-the-sword]

Is there just some universal trait of autism moms where they just assume that their child is unable to think any time they're unwilling to talk? Or- what is this phenomenon.

[rainybeetles]

I could have gotten the math autism but instead I got the funny beetleman autism

Damn

-one person I was DMing

[ilovettrpgs]

I am very normal about how the spirit world works in my ghostbusters campaign totally I absolutely do NOT have entire documents for it whaaaaat!!!

[sillygoofyboii]

Autism

br br br

where the hoes at

.

not here

[sp1rallingstars]

do you guys think i have a problem

[eefozlab]

HELLO TUMBLR

I am not autistic but my friend thinks i am

(Vote no)

[oneirossomnus]

sometimes i need to have a break from drawing doorkeays or other tragic dorks to. breathe. and not crawl up the wall. which is a normal level of liking something for sure.

[lumpkinboi]

Flat Affect

a thing i've found out by googling the other day is something called flat affect, which i really resonated with and it brought to light what i've been dealing with since forever.

i'm not sure what's the problem in my head, but i'm not neurotypical. i have a very serious anxiety problem and i also have a very difficult time interfacing with regular social norms in conversation. people mentioned that i'm weird, that i have a very intense gaze, that i look scary and that i talk very little.

i'm not stupid, i'm very aware of these issues, but one thing that always struck a cord in me was the weird part. why am i weird? is it the way i walk? it is a little slanted sometimes. maybe it was because i'm tall and my back isn't very straight. it could be the way i talk, when i get nervous (which is usual if i'm talking to someone i'm unfamiliar with) i stutter a lot.

but none of these really made much sense. stuttering isn't weird, nor is being nervous. having a crooked back might look a bit weird, but it doesn't make you weird to talk to. and walking doesn't have anything to do with talking either.

it made me become more self aware of how i talked to people, and eventually i started realizing why people think that about me, but i never managed to put it in words. i have a symptom called flat affect, which took me a long time to find. i kinda found it on a whim a few nights ago when i was in bed.

what flat affect does is make you unable to properly externalize emotion. very often in conversation, i acknowledge what someone said to me, but i don't know how to respond. conversation doesn't flow naturally. it's not that i ignored them, i just don't know how to convey that i acknowledged what was said. so i'll laugh, or smile, to try to keep it less awkward. but that doesn't work, because, as it turns out, my "intense gaze" as people described it also stems from that same flat affect.

i started smiling in the mirror the same way i smile to other people and i realized that they can't see my smile. i can feel my facial muscles contort as i try to smile, and i know i am smiling, but it doesn't look like it. from an outside perspective, it looks like i'm staring you down, but to me, i feel like i'm smiling.

another issue with flat affect is body language. i'm really difficult to read, and that makes people unsettled. i don't move my body a lot when speaking to people, so it's feels like talking to a statue. i'm also very blunt, straight forward, and my voice is fairly monotone, which might get people confused and think i'm angry or annoyed at them.

that's not to say i have trouble experiencing emotion. having trouble showing emotional responses and feeling emotions are not the same thing. i get happy, sad, angry, shocked, just like anybody else, it's just hard for me to show it without literally saying what i feel like.

that being said, i'm not insecure about it. it's just how i am and how i look like, and i'm accepting of it. it's a little annoying to deal with, and i'm sure it's something i can overcome with therapy and whatnot, so i'm not too worried about it. i just thought it was interesting to learn about and share it.

[yourfavmaedae]

i remember a couple days ago i was on call with my friend , and um i was telling them about this very awesome show called epithet erased and they said um "i think you have something called something rhymes with "tism"..... magnetism? no;,,autism!!!!" you didnt have to call me out like that ?!!

[mlybrnte]

i was on my laptop searching through google curious if anyone had experienced long term hyperfixation for fictional characters and it landed me right exactly on reddit and i couldnt relate more to stories of women obsessing and crushing on tv show characters. i felt validated and seen. i realized i shouldnt worry about it. when i looked at the top right corner of the screen, I read the subreddit; "reddit/autisminwomen."

i shut my laptop down.

[tortillasconsal]

So my mom and I are on vacations. We got on a tour bus and when we were checking in tickets the driver looked at me and asked me if I'd like some headphones to help with the noise.

I don't know exactly what he meant, but I've never felt more autistic-coded in my life

[shadowsandkingdom]

🫢 Give us a fun fact about someone they know! 

I once observed Palkia (my uncle) obsessing over the appearance of his lawn

I came back 32 hours later and he was still weeding

I also once observed his son (my favorite cousin) cry over a smushed m&m

[andeeznuts]

WHAT???? NO!!! IM NOT AUTISTIC!!! I JUST HAVE AUTISM!!!

[ficmesideways]

Request for Anonymous Gif Source: Smiling Alucard

Imagine being Alucard's autistic s/o

------- Imagine -------

It had honestly been your differences that made him find himself so drawn to you. You keen sense of smell, you aversion to many types of foods that he also found e=irritating that people ate do t the smell, texture, ect. He also found it very endearing that when he had first approached you, you had been completely oblivious that he was interested in you romantically. He had taken you out on three different dates before he had to tell you outright that he wanted to date you and not just go to dinner a friends. The flush of blood in your cheeks as you went from overly happy to almost cold didn’t faze him in the least.

Three years of happily courted bliss he still found you interesting and you him. He protected you from the noises that often came with living in a boisterous small village that seemed to want to celebrate anything and you constantly entertained him with your hyper fixations. You two found balance in each other through understanding an love equally.

[quadrantvacillation]

Buzz Lightyear (2022) is autistic

No I will not elaborate