#I am being safe using the ice pack for a limited time and do not have the ice pack directly against my skin

[tj-crochets]

Crafting update: I somehow managed to hit myself in the ear with a chair so instead of crafting I have an icepack tied to my head lol

[daichiduskdrop]

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚⋆·˚ ༘ *𝙎𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙡 ⋆·˚ ༘ *ੈ✩‧₊˚

CHAPTER 01

Pairing: BTS Ot7 X fem! reader

Genre: A/B/O AU, Fluff, Angst, Strangers to lovers,

Warnings: pretty much none for this chapter! Just a nice fluffy, protective and sweet chapter :)

A/N: hi everyone! Thank you all so much for your support I received for the prologue chapter I uploaded yesterday. I am really happy and grateful. If you enjoy the story, please let me know. I'm always looking for advice. English isn't my first language so please be patient :))

Also, I saw other people use taglists for accounts, I'm not 100% how it works, but if anyone would be interested I will try to figure it out.

Please take care of yourself. I love you.

Words count: 3385

Prologue:

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"Hyung? Hello?"

"Hm? What's up? Are you guys on your way? Jin is starting to stress out 'bout it."

His voice sounded calm, not worried one bit. It was obvious he was most definitely sitting by the fireplace, reading some poetry book. Kook got him one not too long ago as a thank-you gift, and before leaving with Yoongi, Jimin did notice it laying on the couch.

The youngest loved and respected his pack alpha, so showing gratitude in any way was very close to his heart. A simple plant for a nice camping-trip-hike Joon planned for them wasn't too unusual, a new pair of limited edition sneakers was granted, or a nice book of poetry, bought at the seasonal book fairs he sneakily visited, so the alpha would be surprised.

Of course, Jungkook often spoiled all of his other pack members, but among the pack, it was quite usual to buy Namjoon occasional small gifts. After all, he was keeping them well-kept, safe, warm, and fed.

Sure, they all may be alphas, suited to take care of themselves, and they did, but sometimes handing off the lead and worries to him was just too tempting. They needed to rent a house for a weekend stay in a different country? Joon would by no means even allow them to try and do it. The pack wants to buy ice-cream? Yes, he will go on and order it for the group, making sure to not forget any of the complicated toppings and flavor combinations.

Namjoon still had occasional mishaps, accidentally breaking new tableware, another controller, or losing his keys over and over, but his pack never took it too wrongly and knew of all the good he brought to them. It always outweighed the clumsiness.

"Yea hyung, we are on our way to the car right now, but-"

It didn't take him too long to notice that Jimin's voice was softer than usual, and even without being able to smell his scent, he was able to sense a sort of worrying undertone.

While he could start firing out questions right away, it wasn't his first day dealing with any issues involving his younger packmates. Everything could be sorted calmly in pretty much every situation, and he was a big believer of that fact. Though when he heard a whimper in the background of the call, he too grew worried. He sat up, putting the small book away. Unconsciously, he paid attention to everyone in the house at the moment; Jin's smell was in the kitchen, the occasional sizzling of oil and pots heard, Taehyung's scent upstairs, a bit too far for him to be able to sense what exactly he was doing, noting of Hobi's bright smell in his studio downstairs, and Jungkook's, also on the bottom-floor gym.

"Jimin-ah? What is it?" He didn't sound too overly concerned, even if he was quite worried. He didn't hear Chim sound so stressed in some time for sure. It was quite usual for the pack alpha's to try to bring peace to the pack, always have a rational mind and calm any agitation and anxiety.

Listening closely, only a bit of shuffling and fumbling noises could be heard.

"Um..- we met an omega..-"

A longer pause continued, and a faint voice of Yoongi in the background. He didn't hear him speaking so softly in a very long time, making Joon's eyebrows furrow only deeper.

"An omega? Are they okay?"

"No, hyung, something is really wrong..- her scent, she is really, really anxious for some reason-"

"Did you try to settle her? She could have entered omega space; you have to be really careful with that. Where are you right now? I'll come there to help."

"Yoongi hyung said it's the best for us to just take her home to us right now; we just got into the car and are leaving the parking lot now." Jimin said with the faint sound of the motor in the background.

"Alright, that's okay. I'll tell others. It's better for her to be somewhere with only a few specific scents than the mix of ones that belong to the group of strangers. Is she crying?" His question was followed by a soft sound of fabric moving. A shorter pause and then a yes.

Sighing, Namjoon stood up and started to make his way towards the kitchen. Jin looked up but didn't say anything after seeing him calling, and continued cutting up a few onions. Opening one of the top cabinets, he took out an essential oil often used for newly presented alphas for when their nose suddenly got bit too sensitive with the heightened smell. It wasn't uncommon for betas or omegas to use such oils or scented candles either, though.

"Poor cub. Just make sure you drive safe, okay? I'll try to get some things ready for her to nest with; that should help. Hyung is still cooking, but it should be done soon, did you buy the batteries for Tae and Koo?"

"Yea, we did, don't worry. We got some more stuff from that new game store for them too, but you'll see at home. Thank you, we will be there in about.. 10 minutes? I think?"

"Alright. Be careful, talk to you later."

Ending the call and folding his phone into his jeans pocket, the pack alpha looked towards his eldest hyung, who was already staring at him with questions written all over his face.

"What is it? I can smell you are worried, Joon."

For a few moments, he didn't answer, still bit too confused about everything. They didn't have an omega at their pack house basically ever.

"At the mall, they found an omega; she must have been really unsettled, so they tried to help. They are taking her here now."

Once again, talking without any noticeable worry in his voice. It was only his scent that carried a slight stench that was offsetting.

"An omega? Where is their pack? We have to notify her pack alpha; this could be serious."

"Yea, I think so too. Can you give her a meal too? We should have enough for one more person, right?"

Jin turned back around to stir the sizzling pan of glass noodles, softly humming.

"Of course, we have more than enough. You should go tell others. I'll go open windows so there is fresh air here, and it's not too scented for her right away."

"Thanks, hyung. I just hope she won't drop, so let's try to prevent that in any way possible."

Agreeing, he left Jin to his thing and started making his way towards the private studios.

Knocking softly on the doors in a short pattern, he didn't wait too long before he opened the entryway. There sat Hoseok, turned towards him. There was an open file on the screen that he was working on for the past few days.

"Hey, what's up?"

Closing the door after him, the pack alpha took a seat on the large black leather couch.

"I just got a call from Jimin; they are on their way back home. They have an omega with them though, they are taking her to the pack house."

Hobi's eyes widened, his mouth opening slightly.

"Really? Why?"

Sitting up slightly, he kept his eyes on Namjoon.

"Minnie said something was really wrong; she was just too unsettled, and they couldn't find her pack I guess either."

"Oh poor thing, they get really stressed in public places; she must have gotten overwhelmed," softly cooing at the thought of a soft, sad, anxious omega. Hobi always had a soft spot for those in need. And from the description, the little omega must be in need for sure.

"Yea, I think so too. Do you have any new blankets and pillows? Or just anything that's unscented still? We have to prepare at least some nesting materials."

"Probably don't have a blanket per se, but I have bought a new hoodie online, so it should be sealed in plastic and unscented. That could help right?"

"For sure, that would be great," smiling, Hobi stood up and took a still unopened carton box. Ripping off the tape and pulling out a white milky plastic package, a paper written note fell onto the ground. Gasping softly, he bent down in the chair. Handing him the package, he looked at the note, smiling softly. "Ah, look, they wrote me a nice note!" his bright heart-shaped smile brightened up Joon's slightly anxious mood immediately.

Chuckling, the man stood up. "They should! You always order so much!" he said as he opened the door to the hallway. "Thanks hyung, they should be here in a few minutes, okay?"

Now turned back towards the screen, he heard a light "Yup!" making him leave the room, closing the door softly. Now on his way towards the gym, the young pack alpha wasn't too worried about the youngest - or any of his pack members in general.

It was a shock for sure, but they were a healthy pack with strong bonds and relationships, and if Yoongi believed it was best to take the omega to their home, then it definitely was that way. They didn't meet a lot of omegas at their company, since they were only allowed to do very few jobs. Omegas required a good, peaceful company of a similar group that was kept constant, and with how many people mingled during the tours and such, it was hard to keep that up.

Sudden omegadrops were then a bit too usual, causing more worries and stress. Really, there were only a minimal amount of omegas in BigHit; it wasn't common for omegas to work in general either. Some packs that were more modern did support the idea, but the traditional ones were used to pretty much taking care of all of their financial needs.

The door of the gym was left slightly open, so Joon knocked to make himself known and entered. Jungkook was leaning against a wall, breathing heavily with a glass of water in hand. His big eyes widened, and he stood up fully, taking a big gulp.

"Hey hyung," breathing heavily, trying to catch his breath, he ran a hand through his long, messy hair.

"Hey Jungkook, Yoongi called me a few minutes ago; they are on their way home right now, but there will be an unsettled omega coming with them too, okay? Something must have gone wrong for her; I think she might drop on them, so they decided taking her to us will be the best right now."

The youngest didn't say much for a few seconds. Placing his glass on the ground, he came closer to his pack alpha, his scent subconsciously wafting out calming pheromones. It was natural for any alpha or beta to try and calm anyone that was just a bit weak and scared. It just happened naturally.

"Omega? They will want to nest then; we should get some stuff ready quickly.."

"Yea, do you have any unscented stuff lying around?" furrowing his eyebrows in thought, Kook closed his eyes thinking. Wiping off sweat from his face with the bottom of his T-shirt, he nodded.

"Yea, I bought new bed sheets; I think they arrived this morning... And I should also have a pillow that isn't scented by any of you, just me if that works?"

"Thanks Koo, that helps a lot. Can you go get it and take it to the guest room upstairs?" Nodding quickly, they both left the gym, Namjoon quickly squeezing his shoulder in approval.

Walking upstairs, the young pack alpha made his way towards the room that Taehyung was in at the moment. Knocking and opening, his packmate was laying on the bed, softly snoring, covered by a few blankets. Coming to his side, he shook his shoulder, waking him up.

"Yah, Taehyung-ah, wake up; it will be dinner soon," the younger slowly opened his eyes, blinking a few times. Sighting out, he sat up, rubbing his eyes and hair out of the way.

"..Huh?" was the only thing the tired man could get out, mumbling incoherent words towards the pack alpha. Knowing he won't get far like this, he sent him to the bathroom to freshen up. He will tell him once he is able to take in information.

Closing the door and making his way back downstairs, he looked at the clock, only to see that it was about 15 minutes since the call. Noticing Jin getting the table ready with Hobi, he placed the packaged jumper on the couch, leaving it there. Taking a seat next to it, he decided to wait for the rest of his pack, listening to any noises from outside.

It didn't take too long until he heard the garage door opening and a car in the entryway. The soft sound of the motor turned off soon, and with that, Joon stood up and walked towards the entry door. He could sense Hoseok and Jin watching him do so.

The cold air hit him; it was still snowing outside, and the strong storm didn't seem to be ending anytime soon. While the nice, snowy Christmas was, in his opinion, superior to the wet, muddy one, it could be dangerous when driving. Knowing so, he watched Yoongi walking towards the entrance, his coat already covered in snow after only a few seconds of being outside. One of his hands was behind his back, seemingly clutching the palm of the omega.

Oh, but the small omega.

His breath hitched in his throat when he could smell her - the sweet, peach-like scent mixed with rose blooms was really nice, but it was covered by the stench of a rotting fruit. She was afraid, anxious, and worried, and the alpha inside of him felt the overwhelming need to keep her safe and secure.

Her hair and scarf covered most of her face, her eyes downcast as she clutched Yoongi's right hand, softly pattering behind him through the shoveled pathway. Jimin closed the garage doors and followed soon after.

Yoongi made short eye contact with Namjoon, only to pull the girl closer to the doors. Stepping out of the way, the alpha addressed her scent, sniffing the top of her head slightly - a traditional way to show she was welcome and allowed to come inside of their packhouse. Her big eyes were still filled with tears, playing with his feelings.

„Hello, what's your name?” Bending to see her face better they stood close to the doors while Jimin and Yoongi started to remove their boots and coats, placing away the plastic bags. Lifting up her chin to place it over the nice thick scarf she wore, she opened her soft lips to speak.

„L/N F-F/N..” the omega mumbled softly, sniffling at the end. The pack alpha was tempted to coo loudly, but held back for now.

„Alright, my name is Kim Namjoon, I'm the pack alpha... What happened hm?” She looked away, with her hands in the pocket, unconsciously bearing her neck just the slightest. When he didn't get an answer, he lifted his hand and softly caressed her cheek with the back of his hand.

„It's okay, don't worry. We will help, yea? Come on, let's get your coat off and eat some dinner, okay?” only receiving a soft mumbled yea, the small omega shakily started to untie her gray scarf, the pack alpha helping her when she started to fumble with it. Softly petting her hair when he noticed the way her chin shook and how her nose was soft pink, her cheeks and eyes red and slightly swollen.

„There, there. It's okay now.“ he couldn't hold back the soft coo at the end of the sentence, watching closely when she unzipped her jacket, taking it from her and hanging it up on a free hanger. Helping her step out of the untied boots, he placed them close to the heater so they would dry up.

Yoongi poked his head through the door to the living room, looking at the omega for a second. Left in a pair of loose fit pants and a oversized pink hoodie with white socks, standing close to Namjoon seemingly worried just as she was back in the mall.

„Let's go eat now. Is japchae okay kitty? Jin made you a plate already come on.” he watched as her eyes grew wider for a second, big and bright, still glossy with few tears. „It-It's okay al-pha..” she softly mumbled, slowly walking towards his outstretched hand. Once she was close enough, he took her own and softly squeezed before pulling her after him.

Namjoon went after them, noticing the footprints left by her. While he thought it was quite cute with how she pattered after his packmate like a little pup, the thought of her feet being wet and cold pushed his instincts once again.

Leading her through the big living room, and towards the right where a big table was, with already most of the pack members close by, preparing for the meal and helping around. Just as she entered the living room, all 4 heads shot up at her scent.

Jin was the first one to move, placing the glass carafe down on the table and wiping his hands quickly, before he made his way to their direction. While Yoongi was still softly pulling her along, she notably stiffened up and slowed down, pretty much stopping her movements if it weren't for Namjoon softly patting her back, encouraging her to move forward.

„Hi F/N, I'm Seokjin, but you can just call me Jin okay? How are you?” his soft gaze was kept on her as she shuffled in her spot, before answering in a quiet voice. „It's nice to m-meet you Jin... I'm we-ll, thank you..” avoiding his gaze, she let Yoongi once again pull her along towards the seat near the head of the table.

Jumping in, Hobi was quick to pull out her chair, helping her take a seat and softly ruffling her hair. „There you go.. do you like juice? We have um.. I think we have orange and apple, maybe even peach one. Would you like some?” Looking up at the bright, smily man the small girl unsurely nodded, turning her head towards the pack alpha for approval. She didn't want to overstep her boundaries. Smiling with his dimples showing, he nodded easily while he poured himself a glass of water.

Meanwhile Jungkook, already a step further, looked through the fridge. „Yea, we have a really tasty peach one, I think you would like that one,” he said as he pulled out the chilled glass bottle, opening it „it's from a farm that's at the outskirts of Seoul. Here, let me pour you a glass.”

„Look at the back for the ingredients, we should be careful with those.” Said Jimin while he pulled out clean cuttlery from a drawer. Omegas were known to be very sensitive in general with pretty much anything - food, sicknesses, air pressure and temperatures and noise and a lot more. A stomachache was not what they wanted to happen.

Turning the bottle and reading the ingredients, Jimin soon looked over his shoulder and too studied them. Once reading over the four -pure white peach extract, water, sugar and vitamin C, they deemed it safe enough, pouring the meek omega a tall glass.

Thanking and slightly bowing in her seat, she took a small sip, and once her expression seemed a bit lighter and satisfied with the taste, the youngest alpha sighed out, patting her head. Taking a seat opposite to her, next to Hobi, he started to serve himself a plate of japchae.

The omega's plate was already filled long ago by the pack alpha, who handed her his cuttlery, getting himself a different set when he noticed she didn't have any at her place.

Just as she was going to dig in after another approval nod, with Yoongi on her left side, she heard another pair of footsteps. Another man, with slightly damp hair entered the living room, pulling out another chair and taking a seat with his eyes still slightly closed, only to have them shot open suddenly, focused on her.

„Why is the omega crying?”

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Next:

[lovelyladyabsinthewrites]

Chill in the Air

Pairing: Luke Castellan x Demigod!Reader

Warning: slight siblingxsibling hinted at

Words: 1155

Summary:Nights were cold on the Princess Andromeda. Even colder when the Luke you once knew was starting to change and not for the best

Another freezing night on the massive ship dubbed the ‘Princess Andromeda’. Nights like these made you miss the warmth of Cabin 11. Jam packed as it was, at least all that body heat provided extra warmth in your cabin. You had always been aware of all of your siblings around you and it made you feel safe. Now you were among strangers, having forsaken Olympus and Camp Half-Blood. If there could only be a way to spare the other young campers that you had once laughed with and trained alongside. Luke had told you the only way to save them was for them to join Kronos’ side. There was no way they would do that. Especially since Poseidon’s son was there.

From staring at the black void of the water, you turn and walk down the deck. Your nose was starting to drip from the chill making you regret not putting on a heavier jacket. The one reason you didn’t originally wear one was in case anyone or anything was to attack the ship. Your body would have limited mobility to react properly when you wore your heavy set jacket. Even inside there was a small chill that was settled. The faster you walk the warmer you become, also the closer you got to Luke’s suite. Fully knowing that he would already be there. Right where you left him two hours ago. Ever since obtaining Kronos’ creepy sarcophagus you noticed how your half-brother spent a lot of time alone with it. Being in the same room with it for too long made you regret renouncing the gods of Olympus. Every time a demigod renounced the Olympains a piece of Kronos’ body returned to the coffin. It made the whole damn room like an ice box and it always made your anxiety heighten.

Just as you got to his door, Luke opens it; equally surprised by your presence. He looked tired and gaunt. You wondered if he had eaten. Regret that you didn’t stay with him fled when you saw that he was wearing his warm corduroy jacket. Inside must be incredibly warm, even more so since Luke always ran hot.

“How’s the mummy?” You peek around him before he closes the door. He knew Kronos’ sarcophagus made you uncomfortable and told you you didn’t have to be around it until Kronos was fully formed. Small blessings.

“Don’t call him that.”

“I didn’t know his ears had finally generated back.”

Luke grabs your arm. “(y/n), I’m serious.”

You frown and rip your arm out of his grip. Another change in look was his attitude. Gone were your fun days at camp, now you were stuck with a snappy, grumpy Luke. “Calm down I was just joking. Something you used to do too.”

“If you haven’t noticed, there isn’t anything to joke about now. This is serious. It’s our job to make sure Kronos obtains a physical form.” His eyes are narrowed straight at you. He never used to look at you like that. Before. . . before Luke decided to let bitterness and revenge consume him, he had looked at you in a much different way. In a way that made butterflies burst from your tummy. Where your cheeks became eternal flames, causing your face to become a bright beacon. You knew it was wrong to flirt with your half-brother, but in your defense he was the one who started everything. Luke had always been an instigator.

You despised the person he was becoming. “Yeah and if you haven’t noticed we’re in the process of it. It’s going to be a while until then. You can’t just be a ball of pissiness and anger. You’re making this whole thing much worse.”

“Worse?”

“I feel like a traitor most of the time Luke! Hells, I am a traitor. I don’t like the Olympians much either but I don’t want to betray our friends at camp! I joined for you. Because I believe in you. I trust you Luke. That’s why I renounced the gods. The least you can do is freaking joke around with me like old times once in a while instead of choosing to be miserable!” By the end of it, you knew you were yelling. If anyone else had yelled back at him, Luke would roar just as loud. But Luke merely shrinked, looking around the small hallway. Your voice had probably already traveled around the corner.

He was trying to make you quiet again. In a hushed tone, Luke Castellan actually apologized. “I’m sorry. It’s just, it’s just I’m tired (y/n). Really tired.” You knew it must have been difficult for Luke to admit that out loud. Silence was strength in his view. What a stupid make way of thinking.

He glances at you and within seconds he has his jacket off, handing it to you. “You need to start wearing your own jacket.”

“Why would I need to when you always give me yours?” Mustering up a smile you hoped it would be enough to make Luke crack.

You wanted to sing for joy when it worked.

Your Luke was back. That boyish shy grin that was well known for making girls swoon.

Happily you throw on his toasty jacket. Larger than your frame, his beige corduroy jacket swallowed you up. You loved it. Especially since the inside lining also smelled like Luke too.

“You're ridiculous. You know that right?”

Nodding your head, you shove your hands into the large pockets. In the right one you found something. Fishing it out you discover its a raggedy piece of what appeared to be trash.

“What is this?”

“You don’t remember?” When you shook your head, Luke chuckles and takes it from your palm. “This is my favorite thing in the entire world.”

“Trash?”

He laughed. “No. It’s the friendship bracelet you made for me. When the threads grew too old and broke, mine fell off. I didn’t want to just throw it away. I wanted to keep it.”

You had made those five years ago! When Luke had first come to camp. The immediate bond that formed between you was verified with those bracelets. So young. Even though he was older than you, you had been at the camp for longer. As one of the eldest cabin 11 kids, you took it upon yourself to help Luke and Annabeth (before she was claimed by Athena). When Annabeth left for Cabin 6, Luke stayed with you.

“I could’ve just made you a new one.” Bashfully turning your face away at Luke’s sentimental treasure.

Luke runs his fingers over the bumps of woven thread. “This was from my first year here. I don’t want to replace that memory.”

Happy that he wasn’t gone entirely, you drew closer to him so your arms touched.

Still in the hall of the cruise ship you’re able to steal a moment with Luke for the first time in weeks.

[crackednailsandsplitends]

How to Cope with a Heat Wave When Living With a Chronic Illness

How to Cope with a Heat Wave When Chronically Ill

Our first significant heat wave of the year is coming up this week. And, as someone living with chronic illnesses, the arrival of a heat wave can bring about extra challenges. I live with chronic fatigue syndrome (ME/CFS), chronic pain, and fibromyalgia; I understand the toll that extreme temperatures can take on our broken bodies. I used to relish the heat and still do now; however, I struggle to stay in the heat during a heat wave. I’m unable to manage the heat like I used to be able to pre-chronic illness, as the heat wave can quickly become uncomfortable for me and even increase my body fatigue and pain.

Below are some strategies and tips I use to help navigate through a heat wave while managing a chronic illness.

Staying Hydrated

One of the most crucial daily things to do, particularly during a heat wave, is to stay hydrated. Dehydration can exacerbate symptoms and lead to further health complications, as well as a horrid headache. I always make sure to drink plenty of flavoured water (I am not a fan of plain water; thus, I drink flavoured water) throughout the day. Also, consider setting a timer or using a water-tracking app to remind yourself to drink fluids throughout the day.

Keeping Your Home Cool

Maintaining a cool environment is essential when facing high temperatures. Since I don't have an AC, I use electric fans; I also keep my blinds and curtains closed to block out sunlight and finally I like to create cross-ventilation in my home, i.e., a nice draft, by opening windows on opposite sides of my home.

Clothing

Wearing light and breathable clothing is essential for me as it can help my body to regulate its temperature more effectively. Also, with my chronic illnesses comes sensory overload, so I can’t manage certain clothes that, for example, may be tight around my wrists or clothes that are/feel heavy. Thus, I opt for loose-fitting, lightweight, natural cotton or linen garments.

Pre-Plan When Going Outdoors

During a heat wave, limiting my time outdoors is essential for me, especially during the hottest parts of the day, as I can experience light sensitivity, and the heat can increase my body's fatigue and pain. Pre-panning my trips, big or small, is essential for me generally, but more so during a heat wave. I always make sure to take sunscreen, a hat, and sunglasses to protect myself from the sun.

Listen to Your Body

I pay close attention to how my body manages or reacts to the heat. I have to be mindful of any symptoms that indicate heat exhaustion or heatstroke (I’m also a natural redhead with fair skin, so I am an experienced pro at being careful in the sun), such as dizziness, rapid heartbeat, nausea, or confusion. If I start feeling unwell, I move to a cooler place, hide from the sun and rest.

Cooling Products

Various cooling products are available to help you manage heat during a heat wave. From cooling towels, fans, and gel ice packs to cooling vests, they can help lower body temperature. Also, taking a cool shower or bath can help reduce overheating.

Consider Lighter Meals

Opt for light and refreshing meals that don't require much cooking to avoid adding extra heat to your living space. I love a salad! I tend to eat smaller meals more frequently to prevent overheating during digestion. I love to include fruits and vegetables in my diet to stay nourished and to replenish electrolytes naturally.

Don’t Forget Self-Care

During a heat wave, it's essential to prioritize self-care and pay attention to your mental health. I like to practice relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, and yoga, which help massively reduce stress and keep me grounded. During a heat wave, I make sure to get plenty of rest, and I avoid pushing myself too hard.

Final Thoughts

Stay safe, stay cool, and take care of yourself during a heat wave.

How do you plan to cope with the upcoming heat wave? Share your strategies in the comments below!

As a lifestyle parenting blogger, I understand the importance of sharing tips and advice on managing health challenges while navigating everyday life. If you found this blog post helpful, feel free to explore more articles on chronic illness, parenting, and self-care on my blog. And thank you for dropping by!

About me

I am a married mother of four children. One of those four children is our granddaughter, for whom we are SGO (legal guardians)/kinship carers. I run a small business and enjoy writing, so I blog. My blog focuses on my family life as well as my experiences of living with chronic illnesses and disabilities such as ME/CFS, spinal stenosis, chronic pain, and fibromyalgia.  Oh, and I am only in my mid-40s.

[invisibleanonymousmonsters]

All Men Have Limits - X

Character: Dick Grayson x Reader x Bruce Wayne

Summary: A certain bat believes that Y/N is in way over her head, that she’s too naive to act in her best interest. So, whether she wants it or not, the vigilante family is going to help and protect her before she gets herself killed.

Word Count: 4,100+

Previously on…

The next three days were one of the darkest periods of Dick Grayson’s life. 

He was thrown back into the past to the moments after his parents were murdered. This felt the same but somehow worse. Because he was convinced he had the power to stop it, to keep Y/N safe.

Why did everyone he love have to die?

Was he cursed?

Was he responsible for their deaths?

He hadn’t even been able to tell Y/N how he really felt. He’d been holding back all this time, terrified that his truth would just push her away and make her decide to close off from him.

Now Dick wished he could go back in time and confess everything to her. If she had pushed him away, he would found his way back to her somehow. He sees that now – now that it’s too late.

He looked at Y/N sleeping peacefully in her bed at the manor.

Is it a miracle if conjuring was used to fight back at fate?

Dick doesn’t even remember what he said when he contacted Zatanna. He must’ve sounded hysterical and utterly desperate. His vision had been blurred from the tears he couldn’t control. 

He already blacked the whole thing out.

Zatanna told them that Y/N would sleep for a few days. Even if her magic saved her life and Y/N wouldn’t even have a scar to prove she had died, her body was still exhausted from the trauma of it all.

But even with Zatanna’s reassurance, Dick hadn’t left Y/N’s side, absolutely terrified that she was still in danger, that she could still leave them forever.

When Y/N started to shift, Dick sat up straighter in the chair that he’d pulled close to her bed.

Y/N winced before her eyes fluttered open.

Dick didn’t want to overwhelm her, so he just waited for her to fully wake up.

Y/N seemed confused when she realized that she was back in her room at the manor.

Then her gaze moved to Dick.

“Bruce, is he–”

“He’s fine,” Dick cut her off before she could get herself into a panic.

Her entire body relaxed and she let out the breath she was holding in without realizing it.

“He has a concussion and he’s a little beat up. But he’s had worse,” Dick elaborated.

She raised a brow. “You tend to say that a lot.”

Dick shrugged.

But it was true: Bruce had been in much worse condition.

“You saved his life, Y/N.”

She seemed uncomfortable hearing that and didn’t meet his gaze.

“I did what anyone would’ve done,” Y/N mumbled.

“Not everyone would be that brave.”

A silence settled between them for a few moments.

“How am I here?” Y/N finally asked Dick quietly.

But they both knew she was really asking, ‘How am I alive?’

“I’m not sure you really want to know all the details…” Dick had been dreading this conversation.

“I’m assuming you called in another favor with your magic friend,” Y/N thought aloud.

“Zatanna,” Dick confirmed. “And, yes. Something like that.”

Y/N gave him a look that told him she wasn’t going to let it go so easily.

“She used a spell that reversed your injuries. She…” Dick had to pause and clear his throat and get rid of his emotions that were threatening to spill. “She used your blood to write a spell, making it far stronger than most she’s cast. It saved your life.”

Y/N watched him for a moment.

“That must’ve been scary,” she whispered, truly understanding what she had put him through.

She simply could not imagine had it been the other way around. The idea of watching Dick die was something she hoped to never live through.

“He hadn’t left your side until Alfred basically secretly drugged him and scared him to get his own bedroom.”

Y/N moved to get out of bed.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Dick panicked as she stood up to stop her.

“I feel…” she thought about it for a moment.

“Like you were stabbed to death?” Dick offered darkly.

“No. I feel…I feel fine.”

He could tell she was telling the truth.

“Perks of magically being healed?” She offered innocently.

“Guess so.”

She moved out of the bed and realized she was wearing cotton shorts and a baggy t-shirt that she most definitely didn’t die in.

What had happened while she was asleep? How long was she dead?

Y/N went to the window and looked out at the grounds of Wayne Manor.

“What happened when the cops showed up?” She asked quietly, almost in a daze.

“You’d have to ask Tim for details. I was preoccupied with…” Dick’s words died out.

Y/N turned away from the window to look at him.

She may have survived, but that was never going to make talking about that night any easier for him.

Luckily, she understood what Dick couldn’t put into words.

Dick took in a deep breath and crossed his arms, “We got them, Y/N.”

It almost seemed to good to be true. They’d been at this for months. It took them weeks just to plan their final blow.

Y/N didn’t realize how hard it would be to believe that it was truly over.

It didn’t help that there was no returning to her old life. Too much had changed.

“With the evidence you gave the FBI, there’s not a lawyer in the world that can save them. Even if a member’s hands aren’t dirty, the public shame will be enough to neutralize them for good,” Dick added with a bit of optimism.

But he could tell by Y/N’s face that she was having trouble accepting the truth.

He took a step toward her. 

“If there’s members of The Court that slipped out from underneath us, if any of them try to come after you, it’ll just prove to the world that The Court of Owls is still operating. And exposing that will be the last thing they’ll want.”

She tried to force a small smile and nod, but it was unconvincing.

Dick closed the space between them and grabbed her hands.

“Y/N, you did it.”

“It’s really over,” she whispered, staring into his deep blue eyes.

He gave her a reassuring smile and nodded.

Then Dick’s focus shifted. He looked her up and down. “Y/N, you should really get some rest. You’ve been through a lot.”

Y/N sighed. “I think I’m gonna take a shower.” She smirked, “Get all that death off me.”

Dick frowned. “Not funny.”

“Jason would think it’s funny,” Y/N teased as she walked to the bathroom.

He playfully glared at her. “I’ll give you some space. But I’ll be down in the cave if you need me.”

Dick only got a few steps before Y/N called his name as if she’d forgotten something and rushed to him.

He looked at her expectantly.

Y/N stepped forward and locked her arms around Dick and buried her face into his shoulder. She closed her eyes and tried to control her breathing.

“Thank you,” she mumbled as his hands rubbed her back soothingly and he pulled her closer.

Dick wanted to tell Y/N that she didn’t have to thank him. He saved her life and he would do it again and again and again, and he would never expect gratitude for it. Because Dick knew that it was just as much for him as it was for her.

So instead he just held her in silence and felt the warmth from her body – the same body that had been ice cold and lifeless just days before.

When they finally pulled away, Dick was studying her face to make sure she was alright to be left alone.

He gave her one last look before leaving her.

Y/N took her time in the shower, making the water as hot as her skin would allow without giving it burns. There wasn’t a single bruise or cut on her. Her fingers traced over the place on her abdomen where the katana had been shoved through. 

There was nothing.

She wondered if there was a price to pay for such magic. Would she be held accountable? Or would it be Dick’s friend who faced the consequences?

Y/N didn’t know how long she’d been showering, but when she finally walked out, the bathroom was filled with too much steam.

She quickly put on sweatpants and a t-shirt when her stomach started growling. She couldn’t even remember when her last meal had been.

Y/N moved to her door after deciding that going straight to the kitchen was quite necessary.

But she stopped as she heard footsteps walking past her room in the hall.

She froze, thinking it was Bruce.

What would she say to him? Would he be angry with her? Would he not react at all to her resurrection? What would hurt her more between the two?

But it wasn’t Bruce. 

Tim and Damian were walking down the hallway.

“How much longer do you think he’ll stay?” She heard Damian ask.

“I don’t know. I heard the Titans have been bugging him to come back,” Tim answered. “I’m sure Kori misses him and has been texting.”

Damian just hummed in acknowledgment.

Y/N realized her hand was suspended over the doorknob.

And she had a realization: she was safe to leave.

But more importantly, she wasn’t the only one that could return to their “normal” life: so could Dick, so could everyone else in the family.

Soon, Tim would go back to his condo in the city. Jason would stop working so closely with the family he tried to disown and he’d probably stop coming around manor so often – if ever. And Bruce…Bruce would move on to new cases and return to the usual patrolling.  

Y/N turned and looked at the bedroom that had become her new home in the past few months. Her personality was nowhere to be found inside. It wasn't actually hers. She was just one of its many visitors. 

Y/N grabbed her duffle bag from underneath the queen-sized bed and started throwing her belongings into it.

Ten minutes later, Y/N had her jacket and shows on, and all of her belongings were packed in her bag. 

She still had to deal with all her equipment that was sitting in the cave. But that was a problem for another day. Right now, she didn’t have the bandwidth to deal with it. She needed to leave – before she changed her mind.

-

Y/N was just yards from the front door when she heard his voice.

“Y/N?” Dick asked just loud enough to catch her.

She froze in place.

While her back was still to him, she closed her eyes in grievance from the failure of being spotted.

She slowly turned around.

“You trying to sneak out of here?” Dick asked.

It was meant to sound teasing, but she heard his disappointment loud and clear.

“It’s about time I get out of your hair.” 

“We’re not exactly kicking you out…” Dick tried to joke.

“You said so yourself: it’s safe for me now.” She sighed and walked closer to him. “Look, I just…I need some time alone.”

Dick took it a bit too personally. Were they really that exhausting to be around? He thought she had started to see them as her own family. He thought things were OK.

“At least let me drive you,” he offered quietly.

“I called a cab. It’s waiting for me outside.”

Before Dick could say anything else, she quickly turned and made her escape.

Y/N knew what she was scared of. She was scared he’d tell her he was leaving Gotham now that the case had been solved. But she was even more scared that he’d tell her he was staying. 

She wasn’t ready to deal with either scenario.

So, Y/N did what she did best: she ran.

————————

Y/N stared at the wall of her safe house.

The silence that she had once grown used to long ago was now irritating.

Y/N hadn’t realized how accustomed she had become to the chaos of Wayne Manor until she had torn herself away from it. Even when it was quiet there, she could feel the presence of everyone.

Now she was left only to her thoughts.

And just she was about to escape the silence and go grab food at a nearby diner, there was a knock on the door.

Y/N knew for a fact that this safe-house hadn’t be blown yet – and that included with the Wayne family. It was exactly why she chose to come here instead of the one where Bruce first found her and dragged her to Wayne Manor for her own safety.

Which was why Y/N grabbed one of her guns and checked to make sure it was loaded and the safety was off before she tiptoed to the door.

She looked through the peep hole and her stomach twisted when she saw Bruce Wayne was on the other side.

She knew he could sense her presence on the other side, and there was no hiding. So she opened the door quickly.

Bruce eyed the gun in her hand. “This has become a habit of yours.”

Y/N ignored his comment, uncocked the gun, and carefully placed it on a table near the door.

When she was finally able to take Bruce in, she noted that his face was covered in bruises and small cuts. To be honest, Y/N expected more damage after being a witness to his near-death beating. 

“May I come in?” Bruce asked softly.

She blinked rapidly, realizing she had yet to invite him inside.

This was all reminiscent of that night.

And Y/N didn’t appreciate the memories and feelings Bruce was stirring up.

An awkward silence settled between them. The silence of her apartment was doing nothing to help.

“Are you okay?”

Y/N knew the question was sincere, but Bruce still managed to ask it without showing any ounce of emotion – as if he wasn’t personally invested in the matter. 

“I’m fine,” she answered quickly. Her eyes softened. “Are you okay?”

He simply nodded.

Silence again.

“You can never do that again,” Bruce declared.

“Do what?”

“You risked your life to save mine. The boys refused to tell me what happened, but I saw the footage. You threw yourself in front of me.”

Y/N remained calm as she said, “You did the same for me.”

Bruce shook his head. Because they both knew it wasn’t the same thing.

The truth was that Bruce woke up to find Dick crying over Y/N’s dead body. And then a few minutes he had watched as Dick begged Zatanna to help him.

And Bruce? Bruce had been unconscious when Y/N had needed him the most.

He had protected her all these months – with his own family and his own home – just to be useless in her final moment of need.

When Bruce finally woke up recovered to find out that Y/N had fled the manor, he knew he needed to go to her. He needed to make sure she never did something so stupid as risking her life to save him.

But now Bruce stood before her and he knew he needed to tell her so much more than just that.

“What are you doing here, Bruce? Did you just plan on lecturing me again?”

But Bruce wasn’t realized he couldn’t use any words tonight.

Ever so slowly, he stepped into her space, putting less and less space between their bodies. Y/N could feel the heat coming from him. And she sucked in a gasp from his proximity. She breathed in his cologne that she’d grown to love so much that it instantly relaxed her.

Her heart beat faster and faster as his eyes shifted down to her lips, hesitating in a way that was excruciating to Y/N. But it gave her time to resist, to allow her to shut this down before it could continue.

But Y/N didn’t want to do that.

Bruce brushed her hair away from her face, then his hands shifted slightly to cup her face. His touch wasn’t soft, but insistent.

He pressed his lips to Y/Ns. Brisk and determined. 

The tension finally snapped and pushed them to a passionate kiss that was long overdo.

Was this only going to cause them both more pain in the future?

Or was this what they should’ve done long ago?

Bruce pushed Y/N against a wall.

And then everything became a blur.

Bruce picked Y/N up and wrapped her legs around his waist for her, silently instructing her. 

Clothes were unzipped and unbuttoned, and thrown around the apartment without thought.

Their breathing was heavy and reactive to the way their hands raced across each other’s now naked skin. 

For never being at this particular safe house, Bruce found his way to the bed with ease.

From the movement of their bodies and obvious desire for one another, one thing became clear: they were never meant to only share one night together.

————

Y/N had tried with all her might to stay awake – even if that meant pulling an all-nighter.

She was trying to break the pattern. And even though Bruce had exhausted her body to no end, she didn’t want to wake up to find his side of the bed empty.

But she was shocked to open her eyes and find not only that Bruce was still in her bed, but that she had been sleeping on his bare chest with his arms wrapped tightly around her.

Y/N could feel that he was awake. Apparently he was much more disciplined than her.

Little did she know Bruce hadn’t slept at all, not wanting to miss the feeling of her against him. 

Y/N slowly lifted her head, “Hi.”

He smirked at the sleepiness in her voice.

“Hi."

“Didn’t expect you to be here still,” she admitted quietly.

“I can leave if you want.” And he meant it, even though it would hurt.

“No,” she scolded him in a breathy gasp.

The tension in his body released. 

Y/N shifted off of his chest

“And where do you think you’re going?” Bruce questioned.

She shifted so she was no longer resting on his chest, but laying on her side beside him so she could see his face.

“I just wanted to look at you,” she whispered innocently.

Bruce smirked at her answer.

Y/N made sure the bed sheet was successfully covering her nudity.

Bruce seemed amused with her sudden modesty, but said nothing of it.

“How did you find me here?” Y/N asked him.

It had been the first thing she’d wanted to ask when he showed up to her door last night. But Bruce hadn’t exactly given her a lot of space to speak last night.

Bruce’s jaw tightened, which was a message in its own. 

“Bruceeeee,” Y/N pushed back with irritation.

“You aren’t going to like the answer.”

She glared at him. “Did you put a fucking tracker on me, Bruce Wayne?”

“Your phone.”

“When?” She asked.

“After you tried to turn yourself in to the Talons.”

Y/N sighed, clearly annoyed by the answer.

They both knew she could easily disable it now that she knew about it. Even if he hadn’t confessed it, she would’ve figured it out on her own eventually.

“You’re upset,” Bruce observed.  

“How would you feel if I did the same to you? But it’s…you. And I shouldn’t be surprised.”

“Need I remind you that we only met because you blackmailed me and threatened to expose my identity to the world?”

“You know that wasn’t the same,” she shot back as she rolled her eyes. 

“You’re right.” Bruce sighed. “I promise I will deactivate it.”

“No,” Y/N surprised him by saying. “But I will make you a deal…you can always know where I am if I can know the same for you.”

Bruce knew this was a test. Because Y/N expected him to immediately shoot down such an offer. Couldn’t such information be used against Batman?

“Deal,” he agreed.

Y/N was so shocked by his compliance that her overwhelming emotions forced her to lean into him and capture his lips in a kiss.

“Should I make us breakfast?” She whispered to him after barely pulling away from his lips. 

She lightly bumped her nose against his. 

Bruce nodded with a grin.

But before Y/N could ask what he wanted, a knock at the door interrupted them.

Her heart raced at the thought of another intrusion – and a less welcomed one.  

Bruce frowned, but remained calm.

“Stay here,” he warned before placing a light kiss on her bare shoulder.

Before she could argue, he slipped out of bed.

He put his boxer briefs on, but didn’t bother with a shirt or pants.

Even though Bruce told Y/N to stay put, she still figured a mysterious knock on the door was a sign to put clothes on.

She practically threw on her underwear, but couldn’t find a single piece of clothing she had on yesterday. Yet somehow she found Bruce’s white button down and quickly buttoned on to give herself some semblance of decency.

Bruce looked through the peephole. 

He held his breath.

Bruce would’ve rather it been an attempted attack on Y/N than…this.

“Y/N, I know you’re there,” Dick called from the other side of the door.

Bruce knew she couldn’t hear him. But he knew there was no other choice than to open the door.

Bruce looked apathetic as he faced his first protégé.

But Dick knew Bruce well enough to see that there was guilt hidden underneath.

He took in Bruce’s attire – or really, the lack there of.

Dick huffed out a laugh, “Of course. I should’ve known better.”

He shook his head and turned to leave.

Bruce slammed the door shut and rubbed his face in distress.

Before he could even think of something to say to Y/N, she rushed past him and threw the door open again.

“Dick! Wait!” Y/N called to him and caught him in the hallway.

By some miracle, Dick stopped and turned to her.

He looked her up and down, lingering far too long on the white button down she was wearing that so clearly belonged to Bruce.

“Needed some time alone, huh?” 

Throwing Y/N’s own words back at her was meant to come out harsh and cold. But it ended up sounding heartbroken and betrayed.

And, honestly, that was worse to Y/N.

She have any idea what to say to him.

What would even make him feel better?

So, Y/N just watched Dick slowly walk away.

She stepped back into the safe house with tears in her eyes.

Bruce immediately moved to her.��

“Y/N–”

But Y/N shook her head, stopping him from saying anything more.

“I should go,” Bruce told her. 

He couldn’t help himself as he reached to wipe her tears away.

“I should probably give you your shirt back,” she said between sniffles.

Had the situation been different, it would’ve sounded funny. 

But there was no humor here. 

Bruce’s innocent touch of wiping her tears away made it hard for Y/N to concentrate.

So she escaped into the bedroom and quickly changed into her own clothes.

When she walked back out, she had all of Bruce’s stuff in her arms.

Once Bruce was in his clothes again, he didn’t know what to do or say next.

It was hard for Bruce to leave Y/N when she was so visibly upset. Dick wasn’t here to make Y/N feel better this time...and that was all Bruce’s fault.

“I’m not used to saying bye to you,” Y/N finally broke the tension.

Bruce’s brow furrowed. “What do you mean?”

A sad look flashed across her face as she processed her thoughts. “Usually I wake up…and you’re gone. You don’t even give me a chance to.”

Bruce bowed his head in shame. “I shouldn’t have done that to you,” he finally admitted to her.

Y/N nodded slowly, agreeing with him.

“But you did,” she whispered. 

Her voice sounded congested from all the tears she just shed. 

“And all this time, I let myself think it was OK or even that I was the one who had messed it all up.”

Bruce quickly shook his head. “You didn’t do anything wrong, Y/N.”

Her eyes darkened. “Why did you have to make it so hard to stay away from you, Bruce?”

An he knew he deserved that. “I’ve been selfish,” he confessed.

Bruce hesitated before giving her a slow kiss on the cheek.

It was the first time Y/N had ever seen him unsure of himself.

Without saying anything more, he turned and left.

“Goodbye, Bruce.” Y/N whispered long after he could still hear her.

----------------------------------------

Part XI

Did I ruin your life? Let me know 😂

[mxvladdy]

What do you think would happen if MC (in an attempt to keep it away from him) tucked Goldie under their boob?

[A bra is the best wallet but underneath even a C-cup boob is damn near Fort Knox (or the tower of London, I.e. Impenatrable fortresses)]

lmaooo. Let’s us gather round and pray for Mammon’s remaining sanity. What little remands. The himbo never saw it coming. I’m weak and got a little spicy at the end, apologies if that’s not what you wanted my heart was thirsty for ONE greed man;.;

  A/N I originally called this work Tiity prison bc I have a sense of humor lol.

Hope ya like!

To say he is conflicted is an understatement. Depending on when and where you do the titty lockdown will change how he reacts.

If it's at school, he is a mess. I’m talking about the works. He’s red in the face, can’t focus, and sweating the whole rest of the school day. He is definitely torn between fighting his goldie withdrawals and making a pass at your chest.

He won’t do the latter, as much as he threatens it. He may be scummy but he has a code of conduct (most of the time). You get a kick out of watching him try not to stare at your chest and getting smacked by Lucifer when caught.

If it’s on Lucifer’s orders to keep his card away from him he’ll have a bit more control but will bitch the WHOLE day. Honestly, you might give it back just to shut him up.

He won’t outright grab your chest or physically try to snatch it. He’ll try to be sneaky about it. Dropping stuff and making you bend over to grab it. “I swear I ain’t try nothin’”. Right.

If desperate enough he’ll just downright pick you up off your feet and jiggle you like a piggy bank. Like I said, he has a code of conduct. It’s just kinda flexible sometimes.

“C-come on! Give ‘er back.” Mammon pleads, pulling off his classic bagger’s pout. Good thing you were immune. His toned arms cage you in, your back resting on one of the school’s marble walls. “How am I going to buy lunch?”

“I made you lunch.” You laugh. Ducking under his arms you make your way to the dining hall ignoring his flustered shouts. He’ll follow soon enough. The promise of your cooking and potentially nabbing goldie back was too great for him to ignore. Sure enough, he slinks in a few minutes after you. His shades now out and perched on his nose. Even hidden under the tinted glasses, you could see his flushed cheeks and darting eyes. “Better eat now, Beel is going to join us today.” You say around a mouthful of food. He whines but forces himself to focus on his quickly cooling food.

He follows you even closer than before after lunch, barely a hair’s breadth from your back. His clever fingers pinching and pulling at the bottom of your shirt in the crowded hallway. “Please~” He whimpers through his teeth after your swat his hands away again. “I swear I won’t use her.”

You plop down at your desk. “If you’re not going to use her, then she is safe where she is.” You stick your tongue out and give the boob hiding goldie a lovely squeeze. Mammon groans as if stabbed, teeth bared and fangs growing in a mix of frustration and want. “Babe come on. Ya’ killing me.” His eyes are glued to where your hand rests.

Before you can respond a leather-clad hand smacks Mammon across the back of his head. Mammon yips in fright. “I will kill you first if you don’t keep your eyes up at the board.” The cold warning from Lucifer was enough to shut you both up for the rest of the class. You watch him disappear when the bell chimes. His next period was across campus while you were stuck here for another hour. Your phone buzzes the moment his designer boots disappear out the door.

Pretty Boy: what did you do to Mammon?

You: I have no idea what you’re talking about.

You catch Asmo’s eye from his seat a few rows back from you. He winks at you, thumbs flying across his lit screen.

Pretty Boy: Bull- tell me your secrets. I haven’t seen him that flustered in eons, not since Helen paid a visit.

You: Got “asked” by Lucifer to keep Goldie away from Mammon for the day. A limited edition car he wants just got released. Luci is still paying off Mammon’s last shopping spree, so he’s on ice till tomorrow afternoon.

Pretty Boy: Ouch- you not telling him where it is?

You: Oh no. He knows exactly where it is. He is just too nervous to go for it.

You hear Asmo’s scandalous gasp behind you earning you both a glare from the professor. You bite your tongue to hide a chuckle. The professor turns with a huff, and Asmo starts up all over again.

Pretty Boy: Is it in your pants! Can I take a look ;*

You: No and No.

Pretty Boy: Ah- he was always a chest man. Good luck with that, he can hold out for only so long :)

What does that mean? You whip your head around waiting for an explanation text. Asmo has the gall to ignore you, busy reapplying his lip gloss. Even if he wasn’t looking at you, you knew that impish smile was for you. Turning back around in your seat you shiver, now you weren’t sure if you should be scared or excited.

The rest of the day passes quietly. Too quietly. It gives you the jitters. Every corner of the school could be a potential hiding spot for one conniving demon. You weren’t expecting him to attack you, not outright. Yet, you were expecting some sort of retaliation. The last bell of the day came sooner than you expected and it was time for afterschool activities. Packing your bag you wave off Beel and Satan, assuring them you would be fine to walk to the music and arts wing by yourself.  They had their own clubs to get to anyway.

Making your way to your activity you feel the hair on the back of your neck began to rise. Something wasn’t sitting right with you. You look up and around. No one was in the corridors, not even a stray teacher rushing to the breakroom. Odd. You peak over your shoulder and frown. Even the air was still. Chalking it up to a probably very haunted school, you pick up the pace. Even if you didn’t believe in the ghost stories like Luke, it was best to just never find out. No matter what hallway you took or how fast you walked the feeling of being watched only intensified. Your flight or fight instinct kicked in.

Who could you call if you need help? Where in the hells was Mam- was that your pencil case? You skid to a halt bemused. There, in the middle of the floor was your favorite case. The calico kitty design stares up at you innocently from the floor. You open your bag to double-check. You could have sworn you had thrown it in there after last period. Did it fall out? Had you taken this path before? You approached it cautiously, bending down to grab it.

Strong arms wrap around your waist locking around you like a spring trap. They lift you up and up and up. It was so sudden you could do nothing but squeak in surprise, pencil case clutched tightly to your chest. Were you really going to die here? Caught in such a childish trap...wait.  “Seriously Mammon!” The fear disappears, replaced now with exasperation. He grunts ignoring your words to shake you slightly. You yelp feeling goldie and your bra shift. “Oh, my Gods. Mammon! I know you can do better than this.”

“Shut up! I’m desperate.”

Unbelievable. "That's the best you got? Really, I’m kinda insulted." Mammon stops shaking you, his arms loosening enough for you to turn around to face him. He looks up at you batting his long lashes. “Put me down.” It wasn’t a pact order, but firm. He pouts but sets you back on the ground gently. Not before giving you a hearty squeeze. You catch his hand sneaking up the side of your shirt with a raised brow. "Why didn't you just make a grab for it in the first place?"

He scoffs turning pink. "'M allowed ta just cop a feel whenever I want now?"

"Absolutely not, not in public at least. I like you breathing."

“Could have fooled me,” Mammon chuckles. He glances around the empty hallway then back to you. A slow rolling purr starts deep in his throat. "Though, there is no one here now." Slowly his dexterous fingers glide back over your sides. His touch is searing on your shirt. You could feel goldie pulsing underneath the cotton of your bra. The plastic seemingly growing warmer than your skin as his hand travels closer. You do nothing, watching his face grow hungrier with each passing centimeter as he gets close to his prize. “What’s stopping me now?”

“Just you.” He stops at the side of your chest, eye wide and greedy. You could feel him trying to temper himself. His adrenaline, fear, lust, and his raw cardinal desire thicking the air around you. It all pulsed red hot in his veins and travels down to yours. He wanted more than just goldie now. His natural magnetism pulling you in closer. You wanted him, you wanted him to just take it- take everything. The pact mark slams shut, its heat snuffed out like a candle. "Mammon?" Had your teasing gone too far?

"Hold tight to her till tonight." He growls tapping your chest possessively. His many gold rings resemble talons as he drags his fingers across the stitching of your school uniform. "I'll come for her tonight," He leans in, smoke and leather clouds your sense. "and I'll be taking a tithe for all the trouble you caused me too." His husky promise sends a shiver down your spine, gut twisting in anticipation. Mammon's bright blue eyes jump over your shoulder, a frown grows on his beautiful face, he could hear footsteps approaching from your club room. Probably the angels looking for you. Brushing his lips across your cheek he parts, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Be ready. You know I always come to collect."

[0verthinking1t]

Mood malfunction

Lol I have three (3) mood disorders. Probably about 90% of the time, my emotional bullshit can be identified as an ADHD-amplified reaction to something that totally warrants a reaction, but the other 10%.... That's where the A n' D reign (mentally saying all 3 is exhausting, so I shorten the Anxiety and Depression too 😛).

I'm currently curled up on the couch with some Oreos, strawberries, and cheese, trying to parent my brain out of a case of the grumps to no avail. CBT and EBT techniques are really helpful for dealing with ADHD moods, because there are tools like the wheel of emotions that can help me trace my feelings to the source, and strategies for manually shifting my brain from feelings mode to problem solving mode— but their usefulness is much more limited when I'm up against something with no discernable source.

So what do I do after a confusing day at work and 45 minutes of being sardine can-packed into a busier than normal train and 4 hours of sleep last night? Fuck it, let the ADHD mega-toddler brain win for a bit. I mean, if I call out of work with the flu, do you think I'm going to slam the hell out of it with double doses of DayQuil, 3 layers of makeup, and a 20oz half-espresso iced latte for nobody?? So who the fuck am I going to mask for in my own apartment?? If we're allowed to relax and just experience physical illness when we're safe and comfortable, our brains should get the same permission, too. As an example, here are the things my mental grabby hands get to have tonight:

Relaxing on the couch: i don't do this as much, and it's a nice change. Also, there's clean laundry and a bunch of disability paperwork on my bed right now, so fuck that.

The mega-toddler wants choccy snacks for dinner? Sure kiddo. At least the craving for Oreos comes with the craving for strawberries, which in turn comes with the craving for Brie cheese.

Frustration fixation: you know that mood coping with mood disorders helps us avoid? Feel it, just this once. I'm grumpy and tired, and a fun package I thought got delivered today while I was at work isn't here. At least if I spend a couple hours pouting at email receipts and obsessing over the tracking updates, I'll stop being grumpy about work things. Bonus, I learned a couple things about mail courier services.

Blankies: because shut up. No justification needed. Also it's cold today and I wanna be snuggly and fall aesthetic.

Cartoons: I haven't decided yet, but it's going to be very colorful, very silly, and minimal plot. No analyzing, only laughs.

Probably a cry later, idk. I could use some manually produced endorphins right now.

Alright folks, that's it for this one. I'm off to have naptime. Be patient and understanding with yourself, and give yourself permission to put the baggage down when you're in your own space. You need the rest ❤️

[jujutsubabe]

✨What being friends with Itadori (ft. Nobara and Megumi) is like ✨

A/n: Happy New Years!🥳 here’s my first jjk headcanon with everyone’s fav boy Itadori💖

- Being friends with Itadori and you guys go on little friend dates!

- Him buying u ice cream and u guys make it a competition on who can buy each other the most stuff.

- If he buys ice cream u go more extreme and pay for dinner, then he goes extreme and buys u something u liked in a store like a whole face care set or some cute outfits.

- then ur like “😐 don’t play with me.” And buy him a whole PS5 and he’s “😀... u win.”

Movie nights ✨✨

- I’d imagine these r so fun, after the movie y’all rate it and explain how you’d end the movie differently.

- Itadori literally does impressions and acts out the scenes he imagines, he would be so into it, you’ll be eating popcorn and commenting on how accurate his impressions were!!

- Y’all r full on professional movie critics I swear, u guys probably have a whole movie journal too ugh gross🙄.

- After u guys finish you continue to stay cuddled up next to each other as u finish one of the two billion popcorn bags he made for no reason at all.

- it’d be dead silent just munching away, “yeah....that was a good scene”

- Ur cuddle position is either his head on ur lap (he expects u to pet him😌) or his head on ur shoulder, (he does this so he can be nosy and look at ur Instagram feed as u scroll around ur phone)

- However some nights if you want to be held, cue you sitting in his lap or laying all the way on him as he sits up and pets you😌✌️

Sleepovers 💤💤

- Sleepovers r so fun, usually u guys invite the whole Team Tokyo gang for a movie night and it just ends up as everyone sleeping over in someone’s dorm, (Megumi does not want to be there but u guys always force him to join🙄)

- If Megumi happens to stay in his room when you guys watched a movie, Nobara says “I have... an idea...”

- Cue you three dorks tip toeing to his dorm a giggling mess and knocking on his door.

- As soon as he opens the door he regrets it, y’all bombard him and hang out all over his room until u guys fall asleep.

- (he says it’s annoying but lowkey enjoys the company some nights)

✨Spa days✨

- Some nights Nobara wants to do a whole skin care/ spa day, so she has you all wear all the many face masks that she bought.

- I imagine she bought you guys spa robes on Christmas and you guys continue to wear it whenever Nobara wanted to have a spa day BYEEEETHAT WOULD B SO CUTE. Megumi with blue, Itadori with red, Nobara with orange, and u with purple

- imagine her painting ur nails with a whole green face mask on as she talks, “I think I this color suits you but I don’t know...”

- You twist your hand around, “it’s alright... but I do like that color a little more.” You pointed your pastel pink nails to the pitch black goth color. “Let’s just restart!”

- “Good idea!” She nodded and already started applying the rubbing alcohol.

- This would be the.... tenth time you have changed nail polish colors.... how is this safe...

- Itadori def wants you guys to do his nails too, he wouldn’t want nail polish cause he has no patience to let it dry😐 but if he could participate in getting his cuticles pushed back and nails shaven down nicely? Sign him up😌

- Megumi is so cute with a hot cloth over his face, and he’d let Nobara or you put the mask on for him. He is the most boujee in that room I swear.

- Imagine Itadori sitting up as you tie his hair in a cute little pony tail and apply a face mask on him.

- He says, “I’m gonna be so hot after this....” (as if his whole six pack is not showing...)

- *cue Sukuna coming out and licking off the face mask everytime you applied it to his cheek. For like no reason at all.😐*

- Itadori will close his eyes and talk about his day as you pluck his eyebrows and scold him to stop moving.

- He pauses and flinches every time you pluck a hair and will still continue his conversation

- “Itadori! Can you stop talking for a second!” Your focus is dead on those stray hairs but every time he opens his mouth it moves from grasp.

- “Right okay....”

- You lean forward, so close and careful...

- Then he jumps and ur hand misses the hair, “Ah I almost forgot about the funny part! So after Gojo- sensei left I—“

- “Itadori!!”

Nights when Frank Ocean is ur #1 artist on Spotify for a reason💔

- on nights when the missions were a little more draining than usual, mentally and physically.

- Itadori probably needs a hug and softly knocks on your dorm at 2 am.

- You weren’t sleeping anyways, just picking at the scabs on your knee as a movie played, so when you hear the knock you look up. You open the door to see him looking down.

- “is it okay if I come in?”

- as soon as you say “Yeah.” he’s already leaning in for a hug

- He’s the type of guy to hug you for an hour if you let him.

- Your legs started to ache so you patted the empty spot on your bed, he stays standing, “I wasn’t sleeping before you came, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

- He slowly nods and lays in the bed next to you, the both of you just staring at the ceiling.

- This lasts for a while until he out of nowhere pops the, “How do you think I’ll die?” Question.

- Like dude 😐 why do we gotta talk about that!!! Why!!! Chill!!!

- You stare at him but he doesn’t look at you, “I don’t know. Hopefully quickly.”

- He nods, “Yeah.”

- “And hopefully not around me.”

- He turns to you, but you continue “I mean unless it’s you dying of old age… but other than that I don’t want to see.”

- You hear a small gulp as he looks back at the ceiling. “I think I feel the same…”

- You continued to stare at him, he had a few gashes over his cheeks, you were scared to see what other scars he could have.

- Itadori went beyond his limit, as usual, so it wasn’t a surprise he got the worst of it that day.

- Your hands naturally moved to his hair, it was soft and smelled like your shampoo. You smiled at the thought of him using flower scented hair products.

- You shifted his head closer to you, until he moved himself into your shoulder, completely submerging you in his arms. He pulled you close, holding onto your clothes tightly.

- “I really can’t do much without Sukuna.” His voice was muffled as he spoke, “I keep getting reminded how helpless I am.”

- “Are you kidding?” You paused from petting him and he looked up, “You’re so strong, you alone protectected all of us from getting seriously hurt. You’re stupidly helpful by yourself.”

- He looks at you, almost considering your words before stuffing his face into your shoulder again.

- “You’re really cool Itadori. I think everyone in their own way looks up to your strength. Not Sukuna’s.” You started to pick at his strands, letting his hair fall between your fingers. “And unlike Sukuna, you have really good empathy for others. Whenever someone is sad you know how to cheer them up.”

- He sighed as you played with his hair.

- “I think you’re a helpful person, you do a lot for us and we think you’re more than enough.” You continued talking about how great he was and how much everyone loved him until you stopped getting responses.

- When you looked down itadori’s eyes were shut as light snoring left his mouth. He fell asleep all cuddled up next to you, though cute you were now stuck in his death grip until morning 😐.

- You sighed before petting his head, eventually letting sleep settle in.

[thebrochtuarachs]

Something in the Rain - “Finding Solid Ground”

A/N:  Hi all! This chapter has been in the drafts for quite sometime now but I only had the time to pick up the writing. Thank you so much for your patience with my slow updates but rest assured, I absolutely love this story and daydream about the chapters ahead. As always, your comment and suggestions help a lot moving this story forward. Hope you all are keeping safe and healthy! Till the next one!

AO3  / C1: A Day In June : C2: Definitely, Maybe : C3: So We Meet Again : C4: Friday Lunch

XXXXX

She was 45 minutes late.

Claire was running as fast as she could, catching some curious eyes on her as she raced towards Mrs. Kim’s Korean Street Food Hub to hopefully, still catch Jamie for their lunch.

She got off from her morning surgery quite late due to some complications but she still went as courtesy and because, in all honesty, she still wanted to see him. Their last encounter kind of left them in an awkward place and she was hoping that this meeting could help clarify some things. She has been waiting for this all week but alas, life (and medicine) had other plans.

Claire entered the store and knew instantly that he wasn’t there. The place was empty after the lunch rush and she sighed in disappointment.

“Claire!” Mrs. Kim suddenly called out. “This is for you, left by your friend”, she said while handing her a piece of paper.

“Thank you” Claire replied, opening it on spot.

Hi Claire,

Sorry, I left before you arrived but I have to get back to the office. Don’t worry about the wait, I really don’t mind but I just have a packed schedule today.

Forgive me if this is too forward but here’s my number. No pressure! Just figured we can text or call whenever is a better time to catch up. Just hit me up when you feel like it and I’ll be on the other line.

I do hope to hear from you soon. If not, I’ll be here next Friday, same time :)

Jamie

Claire did not waste any more time and punched in Jamie’s mobile number to call. After three rings, he answered.

“Hello?”

“Jamie? It’s me, Claire.”

“Claire, hi! I see you got my note.”

“I did. I am so sorry. My surgery ran a little bit long and…”

“Don’t worry, I figured that must be it.” he said cheerfully, cutting her off before she went into a long explanation. “I mean, you save lives and all, couldn’t be angry about that.”

Claire sighed relief on the other line and couldn’t believe just how understanding he is. So understanding that she’s starting to wonder if he’s even real. She hasn't really met anyone that chivalrous and it captures her.

“Oh, wow. Thank you - and thank you for the note and your number. My guilt would’ve eaten me alive if I couldn’t apologize to you.”

“You don’t think it was too forward?”

“No, not at all. To be honest, I was going to ask it last week before we got, erm, interrupted.”

“Well, that’s good to know. And in any case, I would’ve given it.” Jamie said.

She could hear his smile from the other line and she couldn’t help but smile too.

“Anyhow,” Claire followed. “I am so sorry I missed you today. To make up for it, would you happen to be doing anything tomorrow?”

“Hmm, let me check." Jamie checked his board calendar. "Nope, my weekend is free. Anything you had in mind?”

“Well, if you’re up for it, I’d like to invite you to the center tomorrow, see what we’re doing with the kids. Fair warning though, they get a little rowdy sometimes.”

“I’m game! Text me the details and what time to meet you.”

“Really? Great! Sure, I’ll text you the details in a bit”

“Will wait for it. Claire, sorry to cut this short but I have to run to a meeting. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Oh no, please. Go ahead. I’ll see you tomorrow, Alright, bye!”

-

It was a Saturday, two weeks since their encounter by the crossing, and now she’s waiting for him to arrive and bring him to one of the most special places for her.

Claire hadn’t absolutely thought through what inviting Jamie to the center would mean. Reflecting on yesterday, a part of Claire thought she may have panicked and this invite might’ve been a mistake. On another end was a part of her that was excited to see him and if she was really being honest, spend time with him, and show her the work they have been doing.

She had told her their meeting story and the extended invite to her friends and staff but left out the part about their lunches. She messaged the team on WhatsApp about their upcoming guest and her inbox has blown with messages asking her for more details about the man himself. She messaged that they’ll be able to find out for themselves tomorrow when they meet him and turned off her phone.

“Claire?” Deep in thought she hadn’t seen or hear Jamie arrive. “You okay?”

“Yeah, sorry. Spaced out there for a bit” she embarrassingly admitted.

“A penny for your thoughts?” Jamie asked as Claire pointed the way in.

“Erm, nothing much. Just thinking about giving you fair warning about everyone upstairs. They’re quite curious about you, Jamie Fraser.” she said jokingly the half truth.

Jamie got a bit nervous suddenly and Claire felt it. “Don’t worry about it, I’ll save you if they get too rowdy. Be ready to answer questions though." She said, smiling, hoping to ease his thoughts.

“Is any topic off limits? Should I not mention anything to them?”

“I leave it to you. But if you ask me, just be yourself and charm everyone away”

Jamie chuckled and Claire turned to him. “What?”

“You think I’m charming?”

Claire laughed and smacked him in the arm. “Oh, bug off!”

“I’ll take that as a yes”

“Anyway!” Claire interrupted. “Today’s event is just art and crafts and a story session. The rest, the kids can do and play how ever they like. I usually just play with any kid who asks me to and time just flies and suddenly, the afternoon is done.”

“Got it. I honestly hope I can help more than distract or whatever”

“Pssh, you’ll be fine, Jamie. You’ll be fine”

--

The moment the elevator doors opened, a line of people greeted Jamie and Claire at the entrance.

“Hello, everyone” Claire greeted but to her surprise, no one spoke or moved. Everyone was just looking at Jamie. “This is Jamie. Jamie Fraser, our guest for today”

She ushered them closer to the stunned group and began to introduce them one by one.

Mary, the receptionist and admin assistant.

Mrs. Graham, the secretariat and head of operations.

Joe, also a surgeon from Claire’s hospital.

Frank, the history professor he’d met a week earlier.

Geilis, a botanist and herbalist.

“It’s nice to meet you all. Thank you for having me this afternoon.” Jamie said and it was only then that the ice was broken.

“Hi, Jamie was it? Can I call you Jamie?” Mrs. Graham prodded.

“Yes, Mam”

“Alright, this way. Let me show you around”

As Mrs. Graham swept Jamie away for a short tour, the rest of the group crowded Claire with questions.

“Okay, he is even more handsome than in the pictures!” Geilis excitedly said.

“Pictures?” Claire asked.

“Ugh, I sometimes forget you’re a doctor who needs to catch up to the times” Geilis pinched her nose jokingly. “Jamie was named one of Scotland’s most eligible bachelors in a tatler magazine last year. There’s pretty striking photos of him in a tux and in casual clothes.”

“I remember that issue. Gail had one lying in the house and I happen to peruse it one time. You’re right, the pictures don’t do him justice.” Joe chimed in.

“I had no idea. I mean, I just literally bumped into the guy on the street!” Claire said, a curiosity pooling in her mind. She had to look for that magazine later.

“Such a meet-cute story. Ugh, Claire! It’s like something out of the books or movies” Geilis added.

“Psh, he seems too manly for me. I mean, who is that fit and that put together.” Frank mused.

“I think he’s quite charming” Joe added.

“If you ask me, Claire, I don’t know what’s going on between you two but keep it going” Geilis added.

“Aish, nothing is going on. I just extended a polite invite to make up for - “ Claire stopped as Jamie and Mrs. Graham arrived back, thankful for the Interruption.

“Make up for what?” Geilis asked, not missing that info.

“Oh, nothing.”

“Mhm” Geilis hummed raising an eyebrow to Claire. She’ll pull it out of her later.

---

It was a long but fun afternoon for everyone.

Afterwards, one by one, the space cleared out, the kids were picked up, saying goodbye to the staff with some even approaching and waving at Jamie as they left, leaving him with a heartwarming feeling.

“Well, another successful weekend, folks!” Frank called out and the team gave themselves applause.

“Great job to Joe and Mary for taking on the storytelling and painting sessions this afternoon and I would also like to thank our guest, Jamie, for being patient and helpful with the kids” Mrs. Graham added, earning another group applause.

“Thank ye, I hope I helped at all today but otherwise, I enjoyed today and thank ye for inviting me.” Jamie shared.

“Come join us anytime” Joe patted him on the back. “Alright, everyone, have a goodnight. See you all next week, I’ll bring Gail and Lenny along.” With that he made a way for the elevator and it was everyone’s cue to leave.

Claire approached Jamie just as he was going to her. “Well, how are you and how was it?” she asked. If she expected to spend time with Jamie, well, it didn’t happen. First, he was whisked away by Mrs. Graham. Afterwards, it was Joe asking help to build his set. Next up was Mary who got him assisting on getting and serving the food, and the rest of the time, it was kids calling out on Jamie here and there and he was more than happy to oblige.

“Fun and a little bit tiring” he replied and Claire gave a small laugh. “But in all honesty, thank ye for inviting me to come here. Made me miss my niece and nephew”

“I’m glad you had fun and I’m glad you got to see what we’re doing here.”

Jamie might be overthinking things but he knew that Claire sharing this part of her to him seems like a big thing and he intends to cherish that.

“Anyway, I’d like to offer to drive ye home...or to the nearest bus stop” he added, panicking he put her in a tight spot.

Claire paused, eyed him jokingly, intentionally making him more flush and nervous.

“I’d take that offer but” she began and Jamie swallowed the lump on his throat, “I actually live nearby so we don’t need to drive”

“Okay,” Jamie sighed in relief which Claire found very cute. “Lead the way, then”

[deaththesyd]

Safe Return

Y'all, I am back with another late submission for @kisameweek-2021

I went hiking and camping earlier this week, and then work got in the way, and to top it off my brain decided that it was gonna be difficult and refused to write what I had first imagined, so now we have this. Hopefully, it still fits the prompt loosely enough! Also! Warning: It gets a little suggestive, nothing explicit tho!

Day5 Coming Home

Summary:

“Dude, gross! Shower first!” She groaned, pushing away from him. Of course, he ignored her and craned his neck down to nuzzle his face against hers, making her complain even louder as she could feel his rough stubble grating against her skin. He only released her once Itachi joined them and shamed them for their disruptive behaviour with his perfected judgemental stare.

In comparison to the energetic townspeople bustling around them, Kisame and Itachi felt dead on their feet. They had traveled far, tracking down intel and following dead lead after dead lead for months in between missions, and this last tip was as worthless as the others. The hidden villages kept their secrets locked up tight, and tracking down Jinchuriki was proving to be a challenging task. Both physically exhausted and frustrated with their lack of luck, they forced themselves towards the inn that they would be staying in for the night. On top of all the false leads, bandits, and enemy ninja, Kisame had another persistent worry.

Ignoring the desk clerks' greeting, leaving Itachi to deal with them, he lumbered up the stairs, feeling his cloak pockets for the room key. Locating the correct room took only a second, but his large fingers fumbled with the tiny key as he pressed it into the keyhole, making him mutter under his breath. Whether she was alerted by the noise of the key missing its mark one too many times, or if it was his voice, he didn’t know, but the door unlocked and swung open, ending his agitated struggle and allowing him to finally know that she was safe. His strong arms wrapped around her, lifting her up easily into a tight hug right there in the hallway. Her protests were immediate.

“Dude, gross! Shower first!” She groaned, pushing away from him. Of course, he ignored her and craned his neck down to nuzzle his face against hers, making her complain even louder as she could feel his rough stubble grating against her skin. He only released her once Itachi joined them and shamed them for their disruptive behaviour with his perfected judgemental stare. Once they had shut the door behind them, he was tugging her close again, laughing as she put on an act of pinching her nose as she struggled against his affection. Itachi sighed as he forced his way past them, making his way to the bed that was still neatly made from when he and Kisame had left over a week ago.

Watching his young partner quietly place his equipment down next to his bed, Kisame knew to give him some quiet. It was difficult for Itachi to sleep even in the perfect conditions, having the two loudly playing wasn’t going to make it any easier for him to catch up on some greatly needed sleep.

“Why don’t you join me in the shower if I stink so much?” He teased lowly in her ear, causing her to stiffen as the tickle of his breath sent shivers up her spine, and she appeared to consider his offer for a moment, no doubt taking Itachi’s tired presence into account. It didn’t take her long to answer, refusing to give up her disgusted act.

“Only if it’ll get your sweaty ass clean faster,” She muttered, but even her insulting words held no real bite as she pulled him towards the small bathroom. Sparing Itachi a last glance, he could see him settling into his bed, trying to ignore the loud flirting, yet to only a man as close to Itachi as Kisame could tell, the usual poker face was the slightest quirk to his lips. The one and only sign the Uchiha ever let slip that he truly wasn’t bothered by their shenanigans. Of course, he could never let his snooty, superior attitude slip entirely. He had a reputation to uphold.

The door shut behind them, giving them some privacy, and a buffer for the noise they made. Unzipping his cloak and shrugging hit off, he looked down at her, questionable when she made no move to undress with him. “Need some help there, Guppy?” He said, reaching to do just that, but she dodged him and pressed back against the vanity in the cramped space. Giggling at the confused expression her avoidance caused.

“As much as I’ve missed you,” she spoke sweetly, “I know that if I let you have your way, poor Itachi won’t be getting any rest.” She was right, the two of them, no matter the scenario, always managed to be loud and disruptive, and if they allowed themselves to indulge as they usually would, the thin walls and flimsy door would act as a poor barrier for the third occupant of their shared room. Kisame still moved closer, caging her against the counter ledge, leaning down for just a taste of what he had missed on his investigation. Again she pushed away, leaning further from him while she used one hand to press firmly against his chest. The cringe on her face and scrunched nose made him chuckle lightly as he backed away, returning to shedding his clothes. He really must stink.

Even with her disgust with his less than clean state, her eyes roamed his exposed flesh, admiring the toned muscles that made up the entirety of his form. His looks had always bothered him, but even he knew his life of brutal fighting had sculpted him into something muscle-heads across dimensions would be jealous of. Shark-like features be damned, he had a body that made the woman he wanted oggle him like a piece of meat, and it was hard to care about the face he saw in the mirror when in her eyes he saw reflected back at him only admiration and lust.

Stepping into the tiny shower, he pulled the curtain closed and turned on the water, gritting his teeth through the ice-cold temperature before it ran warm. He was taller than the showerhead, and the cheap place had supplied one that was non-adjustable much to his frustration. Looking over the rod holding the plastic curtain, he could see the woman barely holding in her laughter at his predicament. He took it back, he hated being himself. Grumbling to himself he began washing himself as best as he could, cursing his height and the rest of the world for catering to those of average size. “Glad I didn’t join you after all?” She said as she sat herself on the floor facing the shower.

Admittedly, yes, he thought. Pushing down his built-up need from the length of the fruitless mission, he was very glad that she hadn’t. The occupancy limit was pushed with even just him, never mind the two of them. Of course, she had probably known that, having spent the time the two ninjas were away sheltered in the cheap unit. Still, he argued, lacking any real persuasion, “We could make it work, I am pretty used to being in tight places,” he said with a wink. Caught by surprise, she rushed to cover her mouth after she gasped loudly, looking over her shoulder at the door guiltily.

Ducking under the showerhead to rinse the crappy, complimentary shampoo from his hair, he nearly missed the stern glare she shot him. Water fell into his mouth as he laughed and he sputtered and coughed under the stream, somehow managing to get the suds in his eyes, making his pain worse. He swore he heard a mumbled “Karma” come from behind the curtain, but when his head cleared the shower rod, his bleary eyes couldn’t quite make out the look on her face. Damn this cheap inn and their painful shampoos.

A final rinse later and he emerged from the tiny torture chamber, rolling his eyes playfully when he noticed her watching him practically entranced, following the residual droplets that ran down his body. Snapping back into focus when he secured a towel around his waist, she flushed in embarrassment. Something he hadn’t seen her do in a long time. Chuckling quietly, he bent down to pick up his cloak, locating the scroll he used to pack away his things, and expertly summoned his travel bag. From where she still sat on the hard tile, she watched as he pulled out his razor, and had to shuffle out of his way for him to get to work. Unusually quiet, she observed as he made short work of the unruly stubble that had managed to grow in between his last shave. “What are you thinking about?” He asked, used to her constant chatter, and then going so long without it, he felt unsettled when she stayed silent. Silence with her meant she was scheming.

“I kinda wonder what you would look like with a proper beard,” she answered musingly.

Looking down at her, he raised a brow, “Thought you hated the feeling of a beard,” he tested. Kisame had never really tried growing out his facial hair, always deciding that keeping a clean face was easier. Secretly he had hoped being well-groomed would keep others' opinions of him higher as well. Sometime around their first few makeout sessions, she had told him how much she appreciated the lack of stubble he allowed. That had settled his decision firmly then, so why was she thinking of that now?

She hummed quietly in thought, “I do, but the look of a beard isn’t always bad.” Her expression wasn’t the normal barely restrained smirk she normally wore when she was teasing him, instead, she appeared thoughtful.

“If you wanted me to grow a beard you could have mentioned it before I shaved,” he pointed out, rinsing the blade and packing it away with the rest of his things.

She giggled and leaned against his bare leg, playfully nuzzling him, “Awe, you were willing to grow a beard for me?”

How that made him flustered, he had no idea, but he felt his face flush as he carefully shook her off. In an attempt to hide his blush, he dug around in his bag for clean clothes. “I’ve never really tried before, sharks have rough enough skin as is,” he joked.

She snorted at that, he wasn’t looking at her but the smirk on her face was audible in her tone. “With you, rough isn’t something I mind,” she replied, no doubt watching him as he dropped his towel and started to dress. Easily distracted by his nakedness, she changed topics. “Such a shame you need to wear clothes,” she pouted as he slipped on a pair of pants. The way she so casually said such things never failed to catch him off guard. Turning to face her he was met with hungry eyes that took in every flexing muscle still visible before they settled on the darkened expression he wore.

“Someone really needs to give that dirty mind of yours a good cleansing,” he warned, feeling the effects of her forwardness already. Something he should have known was that anything other than obvious refusal or a joke meant to brush her off would only encourage her more.

“You can go ahead and try,” she challenged, gazing up at him through her lashes. Her attempt to lure him in was almost working, yet the fact that Itachi was most likely privy to their noise kept him from giving in.

Shaking his head, he reached for his shirt, “Weren’t we just talking about me growing a beard?” He recalled, feeling a bit bad at the quick look of dejection he caused before she latched onto the topic again.

“A bearded shark would be an interesting sight,” she said, building up her case.

An easy grin spread across his face as the light-hearted conversation started once again.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Itachi turned to lie on his side, thankful that he wouldn’t have to listen to them become intimate. As much as he appreciated their attempt at giving him some quiet, he was sure that even if they had been situated on separate ends of the building they would have made enough noise to keep him awake. Whether that be with their constant laughing banter or ‘other noises’ it didn’t seem to matter. Listening to Kisame’s low chuckles and her excited list of reasons for his partner to grow a beard was comforting though. Even if his tired eyes weren't enough to chain him to sleep. A week of throwing their investigation off course was a tiring task when Kisame was so efficient at his job, but even when his head pounded from a sleep-deprived headache, he could handle it knowing that he had again succeeded in delaying his bosses plans.

Listening to his friend's muffled chatter he decided the danger of overhearing something he’d regret was over and allowed himself to settle once again. For now, he was content to rest his eyes. It may not be everything he wanted, there was much more he would have to do before his end, but for now, he felt as though he was safely at home.

[lifebeginsbyleaving]

You Gotta Fight... For Your Right...

TO PAAAAAAATAAAYYY

Stiles was about to take the three hundred year old tome, that Deaton told them to be extra cautious with, and lob it right at Derek's little furry werewolf balls.

"I don't see why this is such a big deal Stiles!" Derek's eyebrows twitched with annoyance.

Stiles gaped and threw his arms out. "Oh, of course. Of course you wouldn't see the importance of being invited to a super cool exclusive party. Not you mister I have sex in my really cool car with my hot ass leather jacket on and could probably seduce anyone living with an eyebrow raise! Sorry some of us are lame and need to pander at Danny's feet just to get laid!"

All of the earlier annoyance dropped from his face and a cold blank one appeared. "I wasn't aware that was the situation."

Stiles scoffed and started pacing as the pack shot each other unsure looks. "Well, yeah man. In case you're just tuning into the Stiles show, I'm undesired as hell! So, I am absolutely going to this party. Summer heat wave and unpredictable omega passing through be damned."

Stiles started to walk away like he got the last word, but Derek grabbed his arm. "You have to stay to protect the pack."

Stiles rolled his eyes. "What, you don't think you guys can handle one weak omega? Are you slipping? Unless you need protection from the heat, in which case you'll have to deal. No matter how useless you all think I am, I have more self respect than to fan you all with palm branches and bring you iced drinks in a toga." Stiles yanked his arm back and gave Derek a sharp look before storming towards the door.

Derek growled lowly at him.

Stiles turned back and sneered right in his face. "Oh you know what sourwolf, eat me! I barely ask you all for anything. And after months of nonstop threats, multiple abductions, and getting an accumulative five hours of sleep a week because of research I think I deserve a break! One party. Marcus's weekend long bashes have been legendary since freshman year and a year after school this is the first year I'm invited to it. I'm going! End of story. And you-" Stiles jabbed his finger into Derek's chest. "Can fucking deal, or find a new fragile human."

That shocked Derek enough that Stiles had enough time to storm away and slam the loft door. Even him cursing as the force nearly dislocated his shoulder didn't snap him out of it. Derek only slammed his palm into the wall once his Jeep door closed.

He turned and the pack all had shocked looks. He took a moment to calm down. "There's a rouge omega out there and he's thinking with his dick!"

Lydia hopped of the counter with a huff. "He'll be fine, Derek. He could handle one omega with his hands tied."

"What about stupidly drunk too fucking busy with some preppy asshole?!"

She shook her head. "He's resourceful and perceptive, so probably. If you're worried about him being drunk though, Marcus makes sure everyone is safe. You have to hand over keys and phones at the door. Marcus has someone to drive if someone wants to leave."

He raised a judgemental eyebrow at her. "Him not being able to contact us is supposed to make me feel better?"

Erica hopped into the conversation, "There's a landline. He'll call if he needs us. Chill. Unless there's another reason he shouldn't go to a party with a bunch of drunk, attractive, and popular people?"

Derek turned away, but could still see her smirk.

Lydia had to put the final nail in the coffin. "Besides, Danny will be there. He'll take care of him. Really well."

Derek closed his eyes so they wouldn't see the red glow reflect off the window he was staring out. "Fine. Leave. Pack meeting over. Stiles can do whatever the hell he wants."

Derek would never understand why they all seemed so enamored by him. The entire pack loved him. It made Derek's skin crawl. Even when the sheriff met him mid supernatural fight and Danny took a moment to introduce himself he immediately loved him. He exclaimed about how there was finally a teenager with manners. Derek couldn't figure out if it was the hawaiian charm or what, but everyone on God's green earth that met Danny Mahealani seemed to frickin adore him. And somehow Derek's rare disapproval got out. Mrs. Thurnbury took him aside in the supermarket and patted his arm and said, "That Danny boy is a good egg. He helped me with my groceries. Be a dear and don't murder him with your eyebrows of discontentment." She winked and left and all he could think was he helped her with her groceries first god damnit!

They started to trickle out.

Peter stood up. "Oh, nephew mine?"

Derek sighed.

"Would your objections have anything to do with the Mahealani boy rejecting your offer to join the pack? Or maybe the corrupting and subsequent poisoning of the token human's liver that you find fault with. Or maybe the pounding that Stiles could get fro-"

Derek's fangs joined his threatening growl.

"From that rouge omega. Only if it were to show up to that party. Small chance though, as we said." Peter smirked. "So nothing to worry about really."

"Get out before I show you out. The third story window."

Peter gave him a consoling look as he passed. "No need to get so worked up over the boys rejection. He simply wants to stay out of supernatural matters as much as possible. Besides, I think he's got all that he wants from this pack." He dropped his voice lower even though it was unnecessary. "I would suggest figuring out if you do before it is no longer available. Or rather, he isn't." Peter looked smug as he sauntered out.

Derek looked up with relief to see that only Scott was left in the loft. Scott sent him a consoling look. "Don't take it so hard dude. It's just a party."

Derek felt frustration bubbling up. "Exactly Scott. It's just a party. And he goes and acts like that." Derek shoved his hands towards the door he had slammed like he was still waiting behind it. "He challenged our decision and the advice of the pack over a stupid party."

Scott smiled. "I've known him since I was four, alphas or not it was not our decision. It was his."

"He could get hurt. We were worried and he did that!"

"Did what Derek?"

Derek roared back, "He said he'd leave the pack! He said it like it was nothing! He said it because of that boyslut that makes him think he's not good enough! I'll never get why he-"

"Why he what Derek, wants to have fun? Blow off some steam?" Scott nodded pointedly to Derek's clawed and balled fists.

Derek unclenched them, realizing how out of control he was getting.

Scott went over to the table to sit down and Derek followed.

"Why do you think Stiles became friends with Danny?"

Derek deadpanned, "To get laid."

Scott gave him a crooked grin. "Besides that?"

Derek shared none of his humor, but offered silence.

Scott was undeterred and used to it. "Because he's fun. Danny has this way of putting people at ease. Like no matter what, if you're with him, you're going to be alright. He's fun and easy."

Derek snorted and nodded.

"He shows people how to be carefree and enjoy themselves."

Derek grew irritated. "Why are you here then."

Scott looked sad. "Derek, why do you think Stiles became friends with Danny? I think it's because maybe he needs that. He needs fun and carefree. He needs blackout drunk and mistakes you won't remember in the morning. It's a way he can lose control without risking anyone's safety except his own. Dancing to music till it's light outside might still end with your muscles burning in the morning, but it comes with less trauma than running for your life in the woods." Scott looked devastated. "He just wants something fun Derek. My best friend just wants to be a normal teenager for a few nights. I think he just wants to remember what it's like to be okay. To be carefree. And I don't know about you Derek, but I can't find it in me to fault him for it. Not after everything he's been through."

Everything wiped off Derek's face except bare grief and guilt.

"Do I still worry about him getting home, and if he'll watch his drinks enough, and what if he's too drunk and someone is too insistent yes I do. But at the end of the day he deserves a break. From the craziness, the supernatural, the constant looking over his shoulder, the responsibility, the hurt, and yes ultimately also the pack. He's earned it. With all the research, the sleepless nights, the-"

Derek closed his eyes. "I know how much he's sacrificed for the pack. I'm sorry I didn't realize."

Scott shrugged. "I'm not the one you have to apologise to. But then again if I know him, you don't have to apologise to him either." The heaviness was gone from his face, just that lightness that Scott's unending hope brought. "Couldn't hurt though, right? He'll spend the weekend worrying about worrying you."

*** Derek had procrastinated until the very last moment. He knew Danny would pick him up soon, but Derek couldn't leave the Camaro and walk the last final blocks for some reason. He heard a car coming up the street and his eyes snapped to his mirror expecting to see Danny. He huffed and swung open the car door.

Derek opened the window silently and stepped in without a sound. He inched closer to Stiles' turned back.

He froze as Stiles started to speak out loud. "Should I pack an extra shirt sourwolf?"

Derek was silent.

Stiles turned. "No opinion?"

Derek softly mumbled, "It's always good to be prepared."

Stiles smirked. "Oh I bet you looked adorable with your eyebrows and sash asking old ladies if they needed help to get your community badge."

"What?" Derek asked confused.

"Don't worry, I won't ask Cora for pictures in your little uniform. Scout's honor. " He held up the Vulcan salute.

"Pack the extra shirt Stiles. And a sweatshirt. In case it's cold."

Stiles' face melted to a smile. "Aww it's almost like you care." He turned back to his bag. "But it is summer. Ya know, hot as balls out?"

"You get cold easily. A slight draft and you're shivering like you're naked."

"Considering the limited amount of activities I do while naked, I'm usually very hot when I'm naked."

Derek scoffed, but turned away from Stiles to keep from taking off his clothes in his mind to picture him with a slight heated blush like the one Derek had right then.

"I do hope you didn't come here to argue or try to stop me."

Derek shook his head, but then spoke, "No."

Stiles zipped his bag and turned. "Well, that clears everything up. Is it the omega?" He was still playful, but a hint of worry worked it's way in.

Derek turned quickly. "No. If we have to, we'll deal with that. I-I just came to wish you a good weekend." Derek attempt a small smile.

Stiles raised an eyebrow and put what was in his hands down. "Are you alright? Do you smell toast? What's that thing you're doing on your face? Do I need to call Deaton? I'm sure he's got like a magical milkbone that could fix whatever's wrong with your face."

Derek's face changed to a genuine smile and Stiles' eyes gleamed as the corners of his mouth also lifted.

"I'm sorry."

Stiles turned back away. Derek would take that as a bad sign, but he knew how well Stiles knew him. He knew Derek wasn't good with apologizing. He was giving him space. "It's okay sourwolf. I'm sorry too."

"For what?" Derek looked at the hands nervously folding and unfolding a flannel.

"You know what for. I should never have said that. I knew how it would effect you. You know I would always fight to be a part of the pack."

"And you know you would never have to. We know and appreciate how much you do. Even if we forget to show it."

Stiles turned back with earnestness in his eyes. "Thank you sourwolf. It means a lot."

Derek forced himself to look back into his wide brown eyes. "You mean a lot. To the pack. For all that you do."

"I would do anything, for the pack." His lips stretched into a lazy smile. "I have to finish packing." He made no effort to move away.

"I should head back." He hesitated slightly before heading to the window.

It was a few moments after Stiles heard him jump down, but he knew he would hear him. "Thank you Derek. Have a good weekend."

***

Derek was not having a good weekend.

He didn't even want to talk about yesterday and today wasn't going much better.

He sat on his couch reading a book and listening to music. After he flipped each page he'd check the time in his phone. Normally he'd be busy with something, but he had already made supper, did a long workout, and showered. Usually he enjoyed his down time, but it was too quiet. He flicked on the TV and turned his page just to turn it back to actually read what was on the page this time.

He sighed and scrubbed a hand down his face after having to reread the first paragraph for the third time. He laid his head on the back of the couch and stared up at the ceiling.

The door flung open and a loudly laughing Erica walked in and Derek had enough.

"Just for one night can I have some peace! You haven't let me focus all day! How can three people be so loud!"

He finally looked over and his harshness faded seeing their shocked faces and arms filled with bags.

Isaac meekly spoke, "Uh Derek, we've been at the mall all day."

Derek closed his eyes. He vaguely remembered being home alone all day. "Right. Sorry."

Erica recovered the fastest. "Okay grumpy pants what's got your tail in a twist?" She shoved the bags onto a chair and plopped down beside him.

"Nothing. I'm fine."

She raised an eyebrow. "Right. And yelling at three pups who have done absolutely nothing wrong all day qualifies as okay? Maybe a couple years back, but not now. Spill the kibble."

He raised an eyebrow back at her.

She rolled her eyes. "Okay moderately nothing wrong. Stop deflecting."

"The omega still isn't dealt with and S-"

"Stiles is at a party?" She looked amused.

"No. And Scott's approach of giving them the benefit of the doubt and allowing them to pass through isn't exactly comforting."

"Right, sure. I completely agree that is what's wrong with you." She got up. "Boyd, come and have a conversation with mister ignore the real problem till it goes away."

Isaac piped up, "He'll do it when he's ready guys."

He dutifully walked over and placed a hand on his shoulder from the other side of the couch. "Go and see if he's okay if that's what you have to do." He walked away.

Derek hated his betas some days. Erica because she was so smug, Boyd because he was so correct, and Isaac because he was so supportingly encouraging.

He mostly hated Erica though.

***

It was another twenty minutes and they had all settled in. Erica had put on new pjs and commendered the TV. Isaac had turned off his music and Boyd had asked him about his book and he just tossed it over. He couldn't even remember the title.

He heard them before they slid the door open and didn't bother to move. As soon as he saw their expression though, he stood quickly. "What happened?" His heart was thundering already.

"The sheriff found a body. He wants us to check it out. Before he rules it an animal attack." Scott gave him a concerned look.

Allison spoke up next from where she was linked to Scott's arm. "The sheriff will probably call you soon."

Derek calmed slightly. "Take them with you. You and Allison can check out the body, see if you can figure out what happened, then if you can find a trail. The betas will fan out from the crime scene and see if they can find anything else."

Scott nodded. "And what are you going to do?"

Derek's phone started to ring and he eagerly checked the screen. "If you were an out of control omega and were lost in the woods, what would you be attracted to?" He answered the call and headed to his room to get changed. "Hello sheriff."

Scott muttered mostly to himself. "The loud party in the middle of the preserve with a bunch of drunk people."

Scott and Allison waited for the three of them to get changed, but Derek was grabbing his jacket on the way out before they were ready.

Derek was reaching for the door when Scott put a hand on his shoulder. "He'll be fine. We'll call with any information."

*** Despite Scott's reassurance he broke every speed limit on the way there. He had been searching the mass of sweaty dancing bodies for several minutes, unable to make his way upstairs yet in case of what he might interrupt. The bright flashing lights were already making him nauseous.

He got a phone call and made a break for the kitchen. He still had trouble hearing the call over the booming music, but he managed to gleam that Allison identified the body as a hunter. One with a tentative understanding of the code at best. They figured the omega was being tracked by the hunter and it was self defense. Scott called the betas and asked them to check and make sure the omega was okay, but they were no longer looking at a bloodthirsty killer and just a scared omega.

He ended the call with some relief, till he realized he had no reason to be here anymore. No reason to take Stiles back.

He took a cup from the kitchen, and despite knowing it wouldn't do anything chugged it.

If he was here he might as well check in on Stiles and let him know what happened.

He shoved his way back into the main dancing area knowing that was the best place to find him. He was near a corner when someone approached him from the side and grabbed his arm. He tensed and turned ready to strike, but not obviously.

It was Danny and somehow that made him bristle further.

Danny shouted into his ear, "Are you looking for Stiles?"

Derek clenched his jaw and nodded.

"Is it serious?"

Derek shook his head.

Danny's face morphed to a flirtatious smile. "Then stay awhile." His hand started to tighten slightly around his bicep. "Wanna dance? Or not dance?" He looked towards a dark hallway that made Derek finally grateful to not be able to hear.

Derek yanked his arm back. "I don't know if Stiles would like that." He paired it with the most murderous brows he had.

Danny's eyebrows furrowed. "I didn't think you guys were-"

"We're not. You are."

Danny laughed. "Yeah, we messed around in the beginning. Now we both decided we're better as just friends."

Derek still remained cold. "I have to find Stiles."

"Are you sure, because he looks a little busy." Danny pointed to a spastic drunk yelling and surrounded by laughing preppy vultures. One particular asshole was practically stuck to Stiles' back as they writhed to the music. He was very handsy and Stiles didn't even seem to notice. Danny spoke again, but Derek didn't turn. "We could be busy too. I'll even let you keep up the bad boy gruff act, I like it a little rough big bad alpha."

At that Derek turned back and took threatening steps forward till Danny pressed himself against the wall with a smirk. Derek flashed his eyes and bared his fangs. Danny's smirk fell and fear flashed across his face. "It's not an act. Thanks for the offer." Derek stalked to the other side of the room careful to avoid catching Stiles' attention.

"Whooooo! Body shotssssss!" Stiles' missing shirt and already sticky collarbones told Derek this was probably not anyone's first shot. A girl with messy red hair started pouring liquor into the divots above Stiles' collarbone. The crowd around them started chanting the word shots. The redhead moved to one side and handsy asshole moved to the other. As soon as they started to lick out the alcohol the crowd cheered. They both started to kiss up the sides of Stiles' neck and as Stiles relaxed his shoulders a few droplets rained down just like the blood from Derek's palms. They were clenched so hard his claws dug into them as he watched the two strangers lay claim to Stiles' neck.

Handsy asshole started to move down Stiles' body to a stray drop that was making its way towards Stiles' nipple. Derek was across the room before he even realized it.

Stiles' look of enjoyment and pure glee faded to one of confusion. "Derek? What are you doing here?"

Stiles pushed both people back to allow them room to talk and put his shirt back on. Derek instantly shoved into the space handsy asshole had previously filled. "I have to talk to you."

Stiles sobered. "Is it about the pack?"

Derek looked at those around them and handsy asshole trying to worm his way back over. "Not here."

Derek looked down and saw Stiles intertwining their hands. "We went through the crowd to get a beer three hours ago and I haven't seen Danny since. You can hold my hand for like two minutes sourwolf."

Derek nodded and just as they turned to leave handsy asshole grabbed Stiles' other arm. "Heyyyy where ya goin? We're havin fuuuun."

"I'll be back." Derek couldn't help narrowing his eyes at those words.

"What iv I wanna nother shot?" He threw in a look that supposedly was seductive. Derek thought it looked like he was taking a shit while looking directly at the sun.

Stiles let go of Derek's hand. He smiled at the man and kissed him. The man was so enthusiastic and fond of ass groping Derek looked away in disgust. "Then find Hannah till I get back."

Stiles grabbed Derek's hand again and started to pull away, but the man nearly yanked him out of Derek's grip. "But I want you Mickyyyy!"

Derek pulled Stiles behind himself and growled right in his face, "That is NOT his name!"

The man just scoffed and looked towards Stiles. "This your boytoy Micky? Hes rude, and wrong." His voice went to a stage whisper. "He doesn't even know your real name. How imporant can he be? Staaayyy!"

Derek turned with a sharp look towards Stiles. "You told him your name?! Him!?"

Stiles looked to be searching the air around him. "To be fair I got here around ten and they greeted me at the door with three shots of vodka. I don't remember the hours between twelve and two yesterday. If someone asked I probably would've told them my social security number. Today is strictly beer and a slight buzz day."

Derek held firmly to Stiles' hand as they moved away and handsy asshole started to object, "You said you'd blow me upstairs you shit!"

Derek put his hand flat on the front of his face and shoved him back with enough force that the high top table they had been using as a bar wobbled and the glass bottles on it clinked together when he made contact. Derek growled threateningly and flashed his eyes and teeth.

Derek got a small amount of pleasure from the scent of fear coming off the man. He was yanked towards the stairs by a hand that was gripping his tightly. Stiles finally found an empty room and shoved both of them in it. "What, the absolute hell, was that!"

Derek rolled his eyes. "Oh I'm sorry for taking offense for you, since you obviously didn't care."

"Of course I care! And of course what he said was totally gross, but he was drunk! What's your excuse for wolfing out like that huh!?"

Derek looked away. "Damn it Stiles! He shouldn't have treated you like you were just a fuck!" Derek once again flashed his eyes and snapped his fangs, but Stiles just growled back and snapped his human teeth back at him.

Stiles huffed out a short laugh. "That's kinda the point Derek."

Derek turned to him with squinted eyes.

"Here I want to be just a fuck. I want to be dancing in the lights and have someone desire me. Maybe I want to feel like, no matter anything else, someone wants me."

Derek objected, "You have people that want you. You don't have to do this, the pack-"

Stiles shook his head and interrupted while pacing away from him, "Not like that and you know it. I don't care if all he wants from me is a fuck. That's all I want from him, so it'd be pretty hypocritical of me. Why should you care?"

Derek gave him judgemental eyebrows. "Well sorry for hoping you had self respect. Next time I won't get in the way of you getting dick."

Stiles went stock still and turned towards him with rage in his eyes. "Derek. Are you slut shaming me right now?!"

"Well if th-"

Stiles steamrolled right over him. "Because I don't give a god damn fuck who you think you are, you do not get to tell me what I do with my body! My relationships are my business! Who or how many I have sex with is my business! And alpha or not you don't get to make those choices for me! Because last time I checked you're not my fucking boyfriend! Last time I checked you hardly ever pretend to even like me! So back the fuck off and learn what place you have in my life before you lose it!" Stiles was fuming and yelling right in his face by the end of it.

All of his need to argue flooded out of him and Derek put his hands up. He tried to put his hand on Stiles' arm, but he pulled away and stalked to the other side of the room with his arms crossed. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean that you were a slut."

Stiles squinted at him with malice.

"Okay, maybe I implied you were a slut, but I was mad and didn't mean it. I am sorry. I am pro slut power. Seriously, I raised my eyebrow at Laura sneaking back in come morning time and she yelled at me for two hours. Then she made me wear a shirt that said slut power for a week."

Stiles snorted and sat on the bed. Derek slowly approached and sat beside him. "You're pack. I want you to have someone that cares about you, but if that's not what you want I have to respect that and I'm sorry I didn't. I'll stop trying to stop you from going out with Danny."

Stiles nodded and was quiet for a moment.

"Derek? Why do you hate Danny?"

"Well Stiles, I believe you yourself said it was because of my complete lack of ability and hatred for doing anything fun."

"Be serious."

"Maybe for the way he makes you feel. Like you aren't good enough and you should be grateful just to fall at his feet."

Stiles hummed. "I don't think that's Danny. I do it with you too, I do it with everyone. I think that's just my own insecurities that I need to work on. I need to stop comparing myself to others. It's just hard you know? I'm a human in a pack of werewolves and badasses, it's hard not to feel inadequate. My best friend is a true alpha, and two of the people I have in my life are Danny Hawaiian god Mahealani and Derek Greek god Hale, so there's my self image shot." Stiles played it off with a laugh, but Derek frowned.

"Stiles. You aren't a human in a pack of werewolves and badasses. You're one of the badasses. I have seen you bash in a werewolves skull with a wolfsbane laced baseball bat. I mean sure you did throw up after..."

Stiles knocked their shoulders together with a chuckle.

"But it was badass. And about the god thing. I think you're-" Derek started to hesitate. His resolve firmed. "If anyone is a Greek god it's you. They say Aphrodite appeared both male and female."

Stiles gaped at him and Derek looked away.

"You couldn't be more wrong! I'm totally-"

Derek's embarassment turned to determination at Stiles' persistent doubt. "No. You really are-"

"Athena." Stiles insisted.

"Beautiful." Derek muttered breathlessly.

"Oh." Stiles cheeks colored.

Derek tried to deflect. "What were we even taking about?"

"Why you really don't like Danny."

"I don't want to talk about that."

Stiles squinted. "Implying that we didn't already, and that there's a different reason."

"No."

Stiles was silent still and Derek sighed. "I don't know. I think I just do for the way he exists."

Stiles snorted. "Harsh dude."

"Don't call me dude. And I just mean everything he does just seems so easy. He exists like it isn't hard, like he wakes up everyday knowing everything will be okay." Derek considered for a second. "He's like Scott like that."

Stiles shook his head. "No. Scott doesn't wake up every morning knowing it's going to be okay. He hopes it will be. Scott has seen and knows bad things can and will happen, he just eternally hopes they don't."

Derek nodded. "Yeah I guess so. And with Danny I think he's just never had anything touch him. He had a popular best friend, he was popular, attractive, likeable, good family, he gets nice things. He just goes through life like it's the easiest thing and nothing is hard. He lives like it's easy."

Stiles put his hand on top of Derek's. "And you envy that. So do I. I think that's what attracted me to him. We're both so used to having to fight so fucking hard just to have one good thing, and he just seems like that's all he has." Stiles laughed. "You know how we ended up kissing for the first time?"

Derek's hand twitched under Stiles. "How?"

"I was looking into his eyes and I just blurted out how much I wanted to kiss him. And he just looked at me, smiled, and then kissed me like that was the only logical thing to do. Like it was that easy. But Derek, sometimes it is just that easy. Sometimes we get a nice thing if we just tell ourselves there is more to life than pain and we deserve it. We deserve to go to parties and kiss people that we won't remember in the morning. We deserve to love people and be loved by people. Just because we can handle pain doesn't mean that is all we deserve." Derek turned to him and Stiles looked right into his eyes. "We can have easy and happy things too."

Derek's eyes started to go a bit shiny and he felt the urge to pull away, but he didn't. Stiles smiled at him and Derek's eyes tracked the stretch of his lips and before he could think of all the ways it was supposed to be difficult, he just leaned forward and kissed him.

There were a terrifying few seconds that Stiles didn't respond, but then Stiles' hands went into his hair and Derek tasted beer and something sweet. Derek put his arms around him and fisted his hands into the material on Stiles' sides. Derek started to think that maybe he could get a buzz from just kissing the beer off Stiles' lips when he moved one hand down to get under Stiles' shirt.

Stiles went still and pulled back with wide eyes. Derek instantly felt a pit in his stomach.

"Why did you do that? Oh God, why did we do that! Fuck Derek this isn't what I meant!" Stiles pushed his arms away from his sides and sprang up from the bed.

Derek felt like the action ripped a piece of him out. "I- I'm sorry. You are drunk and I shouldn't have done that anyway. I just-"

"I am not drunk. My decision making skills are quite intact, and- and I kissed you back. So I did it too. Even though it was a bad idea, I did it anyway. It's okay though."

Derek shook his head and got up and quickly started towards the door. "No it's not."

Stiles eyes went wide and he moved after him. "No. Please. Please Derek! It has to be okay! We have to be okay! Fuck I didn't mean- I didn't mean for this to happen!"

Stiles tried to catch him, but he moved out of the room and made it through the downstairs quick enough he was backing out of the driveway by the time Stiles got to the front door.

***

Derek got home and woke Isaac back up just to lead him to Boyd and Erica's room. He flopped down in the middle of their bed and soon enough they were all curled around him.

"You smell like a frat house and you're still wearing your jeans." Erica said irritably.

"I don't think Stiles and I will ever be friends again and I'd like to sleep so I don't have to think about it."

In the small amount of light she could see her face contort with sympathy before moving to annoyance. "You two are idiots."

"I'll be an idiot in the morning. Now I'm just hurt, and I need you."

Erica smiled softly at him. "I'm so proud of how far you've come. We've always been here for you-" She snuggled into his chest more. "Now I'm just glad you know it."

*** After a summary of the night before Erica once again declared him an idiot, but at least this time it was over breakfast and coffee.

They all moped with him all morning before heading out for some mystery errand. As soon as he heard Roscoe clunking closer he cursed out his betas and gathered some things before he sat on the couch to await his doom.

Stiles nervously paced outside his door for several minutes before cursing and speaking to the hallway, "You can hear me can't you?"

Derek set his mug down. "Come in."

The door swung open and Stiles walked in with wild hair. Like he had been running his fingers through it nonstop. A small part of Derek wished that he'd used the time he had to run his fingers through his hair. Just so he knew what it was like at least once. "I figured you'd want that." He nodded to the mug and pills on the coffee table.

"You are a god amongst men Derek."

Derek smiled, but then it turned bitter. "And I thought you said you didn't drink that much last night."

Stiles looked sheepish as he downed some coffee with the pills. "I hadn't. Not until you left. After that I probably drank half a kegs worth of alcohol. Definitely feeling it this morning though." He let out a weak chuckle.

Derek spoke softly. "Why are you here Stiles?"

Stiles sat down lightly on the couch. "I didn't like how we left it last night."

"Neither did I."

"Look, I didn't mean to give you the impression that that's what I wanted. Because I don't."

Derek tried to not break at that.

He really did try.

"I don't want to have you be a fuck. I don't think I could do that with you."

Derek smiled as genuinely as he could. "It's okay Stiles." He said it even though Stiles kissing him while he thought it was a happy thing they both deserved and Stiles thought it would just be a fuck did not make him feel okay.

"I'm sorry that you wanted that and that I gave the impression that I also wanted you to just be a fuck."

Derek's eyebrows went up marginally as he said that, but he quickly schooled his expression. Maybe they could salvage their relationship if Stiles thought Derek had just wanted sex.

Unfortunately, Stiles' face filled with shock. "Unless you thought it was more than a fuck."

Derek got up from the couch and turned away. Stiles quickly scrambled up as well. "Derek! I-"

"It doesn't matter."

"It does."

Derek shook his head and continued staring away. "It doesn't. Not if I want to be your friend."

"It does. If you want to be more." Stiles pulled on his arm till he turned to face him.

Derek's face looked openly hurt and broken. "It doesn't matter what I want because you don't want me. Stiles we don't get easy." Derek's hand started to lift, but it hesitated infront of Stiles' face. "We don't get happy." He smiled as his eyes held pain.

Stiles grabbed his hand before it could fall and pulled it to his face and Derek's hand instantly cradled it. "It's not that I don't want anything from you, it's that I want everything. I wasn't going to say yes last night not knowing that in the morning we would still be happy. And yes. We do get happy. And you know why sourwolf?" Stiles pulled him into a statement making kiss. He pulled back a little breathless. "Because we deserve it."

Derek looked at him confused and his hand dropped. Stiles rolled his eyes. "I don't want to just have sex with you. I want to be and make happy with you. It might not be easy though, but I'm okay with that if you are."

"Are you still drunk?"

Stiles pinched him.

"Ow! Okay I had to make sure."

"You jerk! I just asked you to be my boyfriend, the least you could do is say yes!"

Derek grinned wide. "Fine if I must."

Stiles matched his smile. "You're such an ass."

"Like you aren't annoying too."

"But now you're stuck with me." Stiles stuck out his tongue. "No take backsies."

"Nuh-uh. I'm yours, but you're not mine yet. I haven't asked yet."

Derek just stared at him till he scoffed. "Before I'm dead sourwolf."

Derek's eyes just filled with mirth and a gleam. His hand once again found the side of Stiles' face. His amusement died down and genuineness and love filled it instead. "Mieczysław Stiles Stilinski will you do me the honor of dating me?"

The perfect pronunciation had a lump forming in his throat and tears forming in his eyes. "God when did you even practice that." His voice was choked up as Stiles thought of him practicing his real name over and over till he could say it properly. "And that was so stuffy and proper. Like God what's next are you going to ask my dad if you can court me. Really it's just-"

Derek kissed him sweetly. "I believe the standard response is yes or no."

"We're difficult, remember?" Stiles laid their foreheads against each other.

"Still not an answer." Derek nudged their noses together.

"Do you really need one?" Stiles looked at him with clear love and adoration.

"Do you really not want to give one?" Derek asked smugly.

Stiles bit the inside of his cheek and held out for ten seconds. "Yes. God yes. I want to have your little sourwolfie babies. I've been in love with you since you slammed me into my wall. Or maybe since I saw your car, or your jacket, or your ass, or your face, or-"

Derek cut him off again. Stiles pulled back blissfully. "Or maybe the moment you did that."

"And I fall in love with you every time you open your mouth, and somehow even more when you shut it."

Stiles pushed him away. "Rude!"

Derek smirked then started to study his face. "I won't mind if you still go to parties with Danny."

Stiles squinted. "Thanks, but I'm sure I'm a one sourwolf kinda man."

Derek's eyebrows looked flat. "No, not for that reason. Just, if you want to go have some fun. To blow off some steam and forget other things, I trust you. I know you would never do that. If you need a break to chill out, I get it."

Stiles smiled softly. "Thanks, but I'm good."

"Stiles yo-"

"Derek do you know the reason why I would go to the parties? Other than to get laid."

Derek's eyebrows furrowed. "To have fun. And to be happy while being safe from the supernatural."

Stiles shook his head. "No. I went to forget that I wasn't. I wasn't happy at any of those parties because I was alone. And I wasn't safe there because I was alone. I just didn't have to care there. But here with the pack on movie night? I'm actually happy. Here with you I'm happy. The only thing that made me unhappy was that as soon as I left I felt like I was alone because I didn't have the relationship I wanted with you. Here with you I am and feel safe.   There's a difference between being happy and feeling safe and just forgetting that you aren't. You make me actually feel those things."

"I'm notoriously no fun though, I guess you can't have everything."

"Oh I don't know, you can be fun. Sometimes. On occasion."

"Once in a blue moon one could say."

Stiles laughed. "Very rarely."

***

"Stiles come on, the party is inside." Derek pulled his fiance off the picnic table.

"I know, I know. It's just..." Stiles looked at the front of the restored Hale house, and Derek hugged him from behind. "This is my favorite view."

Derek took in the awe and pride in his eyes. "Mine too."

Stiles looked into the eyes already on him and rolled his own. "Could you be anymore sappy and cliche."

"We've got the rest of our lives to figure it out."

Stiles groaned. "Ugggh make it stop." Stiles dragged him towards where their pack was celebrating at the party inside.

Right when they got to the front door Derek pulled him back and into a kiss. "I'm so happy we're here together."

Stiles hugged him tightly. "Me too sourwolf, me too." He pulled back and looked into Derek's teary eyes. "Hey, hey. We deserve this Derek. We do."

Stiles opened their door to a laughing and happy pack celebration.

Of all the parties he's been too, staring into the eyes of the man he loves, Stiles decided this was by far the best one.

A.N. Well I read through this once and did absolutely no editing because these last few weeks can eat me so here's this shit. Dldr. Much love💜💜💜

                                             Carter😊

[elsanna-shenanigans]

June Contest Submission #20: Rain On Me

Words: ca. 1,900 Setting: Modern AU Lemon: No CW: N/A

“Did you want to go to Pride this year?” Elsa asked her sister as they were cuddling on the couch.

“Are you sure? Aren’t there people you know there?” Anna questioned back.

“Yes, there is but I know you’ve been wanting to go for a while so I figured we should.”

Anna sat up and looked at Elsa. “Elsa, are you sure? I want to you to be absolutely one-hundred percent positive that you want to go and not just saying you want to go for me.”

Elsa answered while laughing “Yes Anna, I want to go to Pride with you this year.”

Anna got up from the couch so fast to celebrate, she almost tripped over their shared blanket. Once she was free of the blanket, Anna ran into her and Elsa’s room to get her laptop. When Anna returned, she went right to the Pride website and looked at everything that they would have going on at the event. Elsa was happy to see Anna happy about going. Since the sisters had become a couple, Anna had always wanted to go to Pride. Elsa was a little more reserved due to her co-workers working the event every year. This year though, Elsa didn’t want to be selfish and keep Anna away from the one event they both can feel safe at. So, she would just either confront her co-workers about being there to support Anna, or just avoid them completely. The latter seemed most likely of what Elsa would do. Elsa was lost in thought and didn’t even realize Anna was talking to her, rambling off the event time slots for everything. Elsa focused back in on what Anna was saying.

“…and it’s all outside too! So, yea it’s gonna be hot but we’ll just bring water so it’s fine.”

Elsa giggled at Anna’s actions.

“Am I going overboard? I’m going a bit overboard. I’m sorry, I’m just so excited.”

“Anna sweetie, there’s no need to be sorry. I find it cute you’re this excited for Pride.” Elsa kissed Anna’s cheek and put her head on Anna’s shoulder. “When is Pride by the way?”

“This weekend. So, in about a day.” Anna answered.

“Oh wow. That’s sooner than I realized. Do we need anything?”

“I don’t think so. I know it’s free to get in and it has just random entertainment times like the dj and drag show.”

“There’s a drag show?” Elsa asked confused.

“Yes there is! Hopefully they do a song or two that we know.”

“I’m sure they will.” Elsa nudged Anna playfully with her knee. “Right now, though, I’m going to get some sleep and we’ll talk about a game plan tomorrow, okay?”

“Sounds good to me.” Anna answered as she hugged and kissed Elsa goodnight.

The day had come. The day Anna had been waiting for a long while. The day that she and Elsa go to a Pride event as a couple. Not just sisters supporting the other one. But an actual couple that could kiss and hold hands. Elsa and her had spent the majority of the previous day making plans on what to do and what booths to go to first. They went to the face painting booth first and got matching lesbian flags on one cheek and rainbow flags on the other. Anna saw that Elsa was a little tense so she decided to go to a booth that she knew would calm Elsa down.

“Kris? Kristoff you here?” Anna asked as she dragged Elsa towards an ice cream booth.

“Anna what are we doing here? Kristoff is basically family! He’s going to tell everyone!”

“Calm down Elsa. He knows and he hasn’t told anyone. You know he wouldn’t do that to us.” Anna tried to ease Elsa’s mind.

“Anna’s right. I wouldn’t do that to you guys.” Kristoff stands up from getting the ice cream that fell on the floor. “I’ve known about you two since the start actually. Anna needed someone to confide in and I needed the same thing. We had each other and now we’re both out and proud!” Kristoff smiles. He then takes a scoop of mint chocolate chip ice cream and a scoop of rainbow sherbet ice cream and puts them into two bowls. He gives Anna the rainbow sherbet and Elsa the mint chocolate chip. “I’m glad you decided to come this year, Elsa. You two are good for each other.”

Elsa blushes but thanks Kristoff and her and Anna turn to go. Anna goes back to Kristoff and kisses his cheek. “Thank you.”

“Not a problem my lady.” Kristoff teases and watches as the sisters leave his booth.

“Thank you, Anna, that was lovely. I’m better now.” Elsa said as she hugged Anna from the side as they were walking.

“Only the best for you, my love. I knew that would calm you down a little bit. People are accepting of us. You just gotta give ‘em time babe.”

“I know I know.”

“ELSA LOOK THEY HAVE KITTENS!!!” Anna ran as fast as she could to the booth. Elsa was not far behind her because Anna with kittens was like a toddler with candy. She wanted every single one. Elsa finally caught up with Anna and had to catch her breath. Anna was already in love with all of the kittens. “Elsa look! This one is so cute! And that one! That one too!”

Elsa chuckled a little. “Baby you think they’re all cute.”

“Because they are! Look at this one, tell me you don’t think it’s cute.” Anna pointed to a kitten laying on its back while another kitten was laying across it on its stomach.

“Anna sweetie, we already have 2 cats remember? Olaf and Marshmallow?”

“I know but they’re so cute and I want them all.” Anna sulked and stared at all the kittens in the crates. Elsa wrapped an arm around Anna and led them to a bench. Elsa took hers and Anna’s ice cream and sat it down next to them on the bench. “I’m okay, I just have a big heart when it comes to animals.” Anna said as she hugged Elsa.

“I know babygirl I know.”

After a few moments, Anna lets go of Elsa and they pick up the now melted ice cream and finish eating them. Once they discard their trash, they hear a noise that Elsa was afraid to hear on this particular day. It was thunder. And the sky was getting dark fast. Elsa looked over at Anna and was surprised to see her smiling.

“Why are you smiling? It’s going to rain. We’re going to have to leave early.”

Anna shook her head. “Nope. No leaving Pride early. I knew the possibility of it raining and I wasn’t going to miss this.”

“Aren’t the people in the booths going to get their merchandise wet? Do people not care about getting wet from the rain?” Elsa was genuinely concerned for these people. People who put hard work into what they were selling/doing.

“Babe, it’s fine. They have a little time before the rain gets here to pack up and leave early if they like.”

Just then the rain started to pour. Hard. Both Anna and Elsa were soaked from head to toe by the time they got to the pavilion. People were screaming and running trying to stay dry but there was too much rain and it was falling too hard that everyone was soaked. Anna took off into the rain towards the booth with the kittens again. Elsa knew exactly what she was doing and ran after her to help. Once they got to the booth, they asked the people working if they needed help loading the kittens in the vehicle. They very much appreciated Elsa and Anna’s help loading the crates in the vehicle. Now that the kittens were all safe and somewhat dry, Anna and Elsa ran back towards the pavilion.

“Anna you so lucky I love you or else I would be angry with you right now.” Elsa said as she tried to dry her hair but was failing.

“Oh, don’t be like that Elsa, you had fun today. I know you did.” Anna fired back as she was wringing out her shirt.

“Fine. I did have fun. Except the part of getting rained on.”

“Fair enough.” Anna laughed.

A loud voice came over the intercom. “Thank you all for coming today! I’m sorry the rain decided that we were having too much fun! Stay as long as you like, we are not going anywhere! Happy Pride everyone!!” There were cheers after that and the music started back up again.

“I guess people are staying then.” Elsa stated. The dj started to play a song and Anna jumped up immediately.

“I love this song!!! Elsa come on dance with me!”

“In the rain? No thank you.”

“Oh, Elsa don’t be such a spoil sport” Kristoff said from behind her and pushed her into Anna’s arms.

Anna yelled a thanks at Kristoff and started to spin Elsa. Elsa was getting into it and was smiling, laughing and even signing the chorus. Then Anna brought Elsa in for a kiss. Elsa heard cheers from other people but at that point she didn’t care. Elsa was at Pride with her sister, best friend, and girlfriend all in one and she wouldn’t have it any other way. After the kiss both sisters went back under the pavilion. They were trying to dry off when a familiar voice was heard. Elsa froze. It was her co-workers. She definitely didn’t plan on running into them but now that there was limited space because of rain, Elsa didn’t know what to do.

“Elsa? Is that you?” One co-worker asked.

Elsa put on her bravest face and answered. “Hey Maddie, yes it’s me.” Anna had seen the whole thing from Elsa freezing up to the greeting and she was on protective mode. Elsa would tell her stories of Maddie and the others but one name definitely stood out and it was Maddie’s. Anna stepped in.

“Hi I’m Anna, nice to meet you.” Anna put on her fakest smile.

“Yes, I know who you are. Elsa speaks quite fondly of you.” Maddie smiled.

“Elsa that’s so sweet!” Anna smiled for real this time at Elsa.

“Well, I better be going. Gotta get my stuff and go. Nice to see you, Elsa. Nice to finally meet you, Anna. Oh, and Elsa, don’t ever be afraid to be yourself.”

“Well, that was terrifying and definitely didn’t almost give me a heart attack.” Anna let out a sigh.

“You?! I work with her!” Elsa yelled in a hushed tone.

“Yea but like, you know her. I don’t. I was being protective.”

“I know, and I love you.” Elsa kissed Anna’s cheek.

“Awe! I love you too!” Anna hugged Elsa tight.

“Can we go home?” Elsa asked. They both were soaked and in desperate need of a proper shower.

“Yea we can go home. They did cancel the drag show because of the rain so we can go.” Anna answered as she reached for Elsa’s hand and intertwined their fingers. “So, first Pride. Good or bad? Besides the rain because I know you’re a smartass.”

Elsa laughed. “Good. Great actually. I had a really nice time today.”

“I’m so happy to hear that!” Anna squealed. “I have all these plans for next year. Matching shirts, rainbow of course, and then we can do our hair and nails and make up. Oh my god I’m so excited!”

Elsa chuckled to herself and let Anna ramble on about the plans for next year. What have I got myself into?

[northcarolinanative]

𝙲𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚒𝚘𝚗  /  𝙲𝚑 𝟷𝟷

Chapter 11: Surprise 

A/N: I know it’s been a hot minute since I posted a chapter. My bad. I also am trying to figure out my take on the season’s loose ends, which is hard because I have a lot of ideas, but have no idea how to execute them haha. Thank you all for the large amount of support, it means the world <3. As always Requests/ asks/ and DMs are open:) 

Description: John B’s Sister comes home from staying with their mom, only to find out that her brother is missing and her dad was murdered. JJ may have just lost his best friend. Her and JJ have to figure out what to do and how to pick up the pieces.

Need to catch up?  Full Collision Masterlist // (I just made it so please let me know if there are Issues:))

Pope quickly hurried JJ outside and down to the dock to cool off. I heard a small part of their conversation as they left. Pope told JJ that Rafe couldn't “Rot in a jail cell if he was dead.” That’s what I wanted. Rafe looked bad, and it served him right. He was a terrible person. He ran off my brother, and even his own sister to get away with his crimes. 

“So you were going to the Country Club to look for a job?” Kie questioned. She began to pack up the first aid kit. Still standing beside me, but she didn’t look up in my direction. 

“Yea” I swallowed, “Umm, I mean I’m gonna need money to keep things running over at the Chateau. I’d rather be here than back on the mainland. Mom has trips planned all summer, so it’s either on my own there or on my own here.” I finished with a sarcastic laugh. 

I saw Kie’s expression soften. She walked around the desk that I was still sitting on. When she opened the drawer it screeched so loud that I felt my eyebrows scrunch together. “Sorry,” Kie said. She walked over and leaned against the wall in front of me facing the desk. “One of the Waitresses, Vannessa, quit this morning, so there’s an opening.” She paused and looked at me for a reaction. “And If you can handle those jerks at the Country Club summer after summer I’m pretty sure you can handle a few tourons.” She joked, causing both of us to laugh. “I know it doesn’t begin to make up for what I said the other day at the Chateau, but I am really sorry.” 

I smiled in her direction, opening my arms. She made the short stride to the desk and we wrapped each other in our arms. We pulled away shortly after. “So what do you say? Wanna work at the infamous Wreck?” She smiled and winked in my direction. 

“Yes, I’d love to.” I smiled. I knew her father wasn’t too fond of her friends, so I was hoping that he would be just as on board with this as Kie was. 

“Okay, so I hate to do this to you but you’ll have to start pretty soon, the business has picked up since the ferry started running again. Follow me.” She said, leading us into a back room. “Here are two shirts, if you need more just let me know, and an apron and a book, you can leave those in the back room if you need to though.” We walked out into the dining room where Pope and JJ were standing by the door. “Got it?” Kie said with a smile.

“I think so,” I said looking at JJ who was poking at Pope, annoying him. I was glad Pope was able to calm JJ down from his short temper. I saw Kie look between JJ, who was now smiling like an idiot at me, and me, but she didn’t say anything. “So you’ll call when I get my first shift?” I questioned. 

“Yes ma’am.” She faked a professional tone, causing both of us to laugh. “Should be in the next few days.” 

“Alright. I’m gonna head home, today has been long enough, and its barley even the afternoon” I said rolling my eyes. “I just wanna relax now.” I gave Kie a sheepish smile and waved, walking over to the boys.

Pope seemed to get the memo as he waved to me. “Hope that cheek gets better, fighter.” He laughed before going to join Kie. 

“JJ make sure she ices that” Kie yelled to the two if you. JJ just held up two fingers and jokingly saluted her as we walked out the door. 

The short walk through the parking lot to my car was silent. Heavy, like everything, seemed to be these days. I tried to put my key in the door, but it was proving difficult. I had not realized how bad I was shaking until now. JJ noticed my hesitation before walking over to my side. I held my hand out in front of me, extending my fingers to see just how bad my hands were shaking. JJ reached up and grabbed my shaking hand in his. I looked up at him, scrunching my eyebrows together. 

“Why don’t you let me drive? You’re still quite shaken up Y/N.” I just nodded and placed the keys in his open hand. A smile formed on his face as he handed me the white paper bag in his hand. 

“What is this?” I asked. I didn’t see him holding it earlier. 

“I may have snuck some food when Mr.C wasn’t looking.” He smiled, sending me a wink before nodding at the car. I walked around to the side and got in. I sat the warm food on my lap. The engine sputtered as it finally turned over and started up. JJ and I both laughed a little, relieved that it started. 

Soft Reggae music filled the car, playing off the local radio station. The windows were rolled down, letting the salty air blow through the air. I looked over at JJ and the sun was hitting his face in a way that, not to be dramatic, looked angelic. At this moment things felt almost normal. It felt as if Rafe and Ward Cameron didn’t exist like John B would be waiting for us at the Chateau like Dad would be there with him. JJ pulled me from my quickly spiraling daydream, “I got you chicken tenders because I know you have the taste of a five year old.” He laughed. 

“I prefer the term ‘sophisticated palette,’” I spoke in a fake posh accent, instantly regretting it. “I’m never doing that again,” I said as we both laughed. JJ and I crossed the bridge taking us back over to the cut. “Kie gave me a job at The Wreck,” I said. 

JJ looked my way quickly before turning his eyes back toward the road. “So y’all made up or?” JJ trailed off. His limited knowledge of girls and their arguments showing. 

I laughed softly before continuing. “Yes,” I paused. “Don’t get me wrong I am still upset that she wasn’t supportive from the beginning, but she did apologize.”

“I’m glad she did. Honestly, you bring out a soft side in her. I think I can count on one hand the number of times that I’ve heard of Kie apologize to anyone” JJ laughed. 

“Did you tell Pope about last night?” I asked. 

“Oh, I didn’t think that they would take it well.” He said a hand reaching up to scratch the back of his neck. 

“Okay good. I was talking with Pope about how he was feeling, and I just don't want to give them a false sense of hope, ya know?” I looked out the window at the trees that lined the road. 

“Give them a false sense of hope?” JJ questioned, but quickly laughed. “Right, you were talking about the map and John B.” His face turned bright red. 

“Yes JJ,” I said smiling, realizing that he thought I was talking about the new dynamic forming between the two of us. . “I hope that you aren't running around kissing and telling JJ,” I said playfully pushing his shoulder. 

“Oh don’t you worry princess. Your secret’s safe with me.” He said, causing us both to laugh again. His hand reached over to grab mine, which had managed to stop shaking significantly and giving it a reassuring squeeze. JJ had managed to help relax my mind by being his usual joking self. The rest of the short ride back to the Chateau returned to the soft music playing from the radio. JJ’s hand at some point had left mine and was now resting on my leg just above my knee, not that I was complaining. 

When we arrived at the house JJ helped me carry in the food as we sat on the couch on the back porch, overlooking the water, while we ate. On the table in front of us sat our meals and the map from the night before. JJ and I were looking over it just to see if we could find any other potentials as promising as the cargo ship. We didn’t. 

JJ finished his meal by pushing the last fry into his already full mouth. He chewed while tapping the line repeatedly. “This ship” He paused to swallow, “is it.” 

I followed the line down the ship onto the edge of the page where it stopped, just as it moved across to the South Carolina Border. I grabbed the ship log. “It says here that the ship was making one stop in Nassau.” I looked over at JJ, who had leaned back, kicking his feet up onto the table.  “So what’s next?” I questioned, leaning back into the worn couch. 

“Me?” JJ pointed to his face, a shocked look on his face. “This is all on you Nancy Drew, I’m like scooby doo, here for comedic relief and treats.” His voice coated with sarcasm as he sent a wink in my direction. 

“Well Scooby, you need to do something to earn your treats, don’t you? You don’t get rewarded for sitting there and being pretty.” I rolled my eyes. 

JJ shifted closer to me on the couch. “So you think I’m pretty?” He laughed. 

My face turned bright red. “Maybe? Don’t push it.” 

“You look tired,” JJ said softly. He laid into me, resting against my chest, looking up at my face. 

“Wow, I call you pretty and you call me tired. I don’t know if this is going to work buddy.” I let out a sarcastic laugh. 

“You know what I mean Y/N.” He reached up with his hand, running the back of his fingers across the bruise and cut on my face, his eyes intense on the mark. He then moved to trace the now darkened bruise on my neck. I felt my breath hitch in my throat as he did. His eyes moved quickly to meet mine. We seemed locked in that position, looking into each other’s eyes. I felt like I was searching for something. I was always seeming to be searching for something. I saw his eye flick down to my mouth, where I subconsciously, licked my lips. 

JJ took that as a cue to move forward. He pressed his lips against mine. The kiss was gentle at first, but quickly became more heated. He moved from his position. He used his legs to crawl on top of me, situating himself between my legs. One of his arms holding himself up, the other found its way to my waist. The intimacy of the moment only making things hotter. The kiss was becoming sloppier, as my hands found my way into JJ’s hair, messing it up. JJ’s mouth started to move. He started my chin and up my jaw towards my ear, opposite of the bruises. His other hand came up to cradle my face. His fingers hit right at the cut on my cheek. I pulled away with a faint ‘ouch’. 

That was enough of JJ to stop completely and pull away. He moved to sit up, pulling me with him. “That was”

“Hot.” I finished for him, with a smile. I could feel that my face was hot and probably the color of a tomato. 

He smiled at me, biting his now red and swollen lips. “You know, I’m really liking getting used to this.” He chuckled pointing between the two of us. “I’ll be right back.” He stated, before standing up and walking back into the chateau. I looked out over the water. The wind was a bit heavier today, causing the sound to be rougher than usual. The small waves were lapping against the shore, mixed with the soft rustle of the leaves, making a rather calming noise. I laid back down, feeling a wave of exhaustion run over me. I closed my eyes and let the feeling of relaxation take over. 

I heard the porch door swing open, signaling that JJ had returned, but I kept my eyes closed. My eyes shot open, causing me to sit up when something cold landed on my face. I reach to grab it, finding JJ smiling and holding a bag of frozen peas. I gave him a questioning look. 

“What Kie said that you need to ice your face?” He said, shrugging. JJ crawled back to my side. His head resting on my chest once again. He put the peas over my injured eye. “I also didn’t want to bother you too much. You should sleep” He said with a faint smile. 

I nodded, letting my eyes close, one hand holding the peas to my eyes, the other mindlessly in JJ’s hair. I focused back on the sound of the waves, and the rustling leaves, or the way that JJ had pulled his arm around me bringing me closer, or the way that his hand was drawing small patterns on my back through my shirt. I felt myself beginning to drift off into sleep. 

I was woken up to a loud banging noise. I jumped but felt JJ’s weight still on top of me. “JJ, Wha–.” My words quickly interrupted as JJ quickly put his hand over my mouth. I saw his eyes wide as he sunk further into the couch. 

“We need to get out of here,” He said, in a voice so soft it was barely a whisper. “Follow me.” He slid off the couch, grabbing the keys off the table, staying low. He grabbed my hand, pulling me with him. I followed his actions. 

A loud booming voice made me jump once again. “Surprise Maybank.” I heard a crash of something breaking inside. ”Payback time you little Bitch.” 

I looked at JJ, with wide eyes and he cursed, trying to pull us off the porch. I heard doors opening and closing doors loudly in the house while banging on the wall. JJ was slowly pushing open the screen door so that it wouldn’t screech. He held it so it wouldn’t slam as we continued down the steps. 

The loud male voice boomed again. “Went to see your old man Maybank.” I looked at JJ as his head snapped up to look at the house. JJ pushed me up against the house as the male figure exited through the back porch door. I looked at JJ, I could feel how wide my eyes were, but what scared me the most was the fear in JJ’s eyes. “Said you hadn’t been around in a few days. Thought you’d be here, I’d hate to go rough up your girl Kiara, or your boy Pope who tried to choke out Country Club.” I saw the man standing on the steps of the porch. I shot JJ a questioning glance at what the man had just said. He was short, but fairly muscular. He wore a bandana covering his lower half of his face, black curly hair falling around it. In his hand was a short barrel shotgun, one he obviously wasn’t afraid to use. JJ quickly pulled us around the corner of the house before the man could see us. 

“JJ what the hell is going on?” I whisper. JJ just holds up a hand to silence me. He’s still standing in front of me, my back to the outside wall of the house. He moved to look over around the corner. I heard the door to the house shut again and I was being pulled toward the trees surrounding the house. I looked to the driveway catching a glimpse of the blue charger parked there before I was pulled by my hand to the woods by JJ. 

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[mr-entj]

Mental Health Wellness Tips for Quarantine

Sharing a piece a clinical psychologist in my network published.

______________

After having thirty-one sessions this week with patients where the singular focus was COVID-19 and how to cope, I decided to consolidate my advice and make a list that I hope is helpful to all. I can't control a lot of what is going on right now, but I can contribute this.

Edit: I am surprised and heartened that this has been shared so widely! People have asked me to credential myself, so to that end, I am a doctoral level Psychologist in NYS with a Psy.D. in the specialities of School and Clinical Psychology.

1. Stick to a routine. Go to sleep and wake up at a reasonable time, write a schedule that is varied and includes time for work as well as self-care.

2. Dress for the social life you want, not the social life you have. Get showered and dressed in comfortable clothes, wash your face, brush your teeth. Take the time to do a bath or a facial. Put on some bright colors. It is amazing how our dress can impact our mood.

3. Get out at least once a day, for at least thirty minutes. If you are concerned of contact, try first thing in the morning, or later in the evening, and try less traveled streets and avenues. If you are high risk or living with those who are high risk, open the windows and blast the fan. It is amazing how much fresh air can do for spirits.

4. Find some time to move each day, again daily for at least thirty minutes. If you don’t feel comfortable going outside, there are many YouTube videos that offer free movement classes, and if all else fails, turn on the music and have a dance party!

5. Reach out to others, you guessed it, at least once daily for thirty minutes. Try to do FaceTime, Skype, phone calls, texting—connect with other people to seek and provide support. Don’t forget to do this for your children as well. Set up virtual playdates with friends daily via FaceTime, Facebook Messenger Kids, Zoom, etc—your kids miss their friends, too!

6. Stay hydrated and eat well. This one may seem obvious, but stress and eating often don’t mix well, and we find ourselves over-indulging, forgetting to eat, and avoiding food. Drink plenty of water, eat some good and nutritious foods, and challenge yourself to learn how to cook something new!

7. Develop a self-care toolkit. This can look different for everyone. A lot of successful self-care strategies involve a sensory component (seven senses: touch, taste, sight, hearing, smell, vestibular (movement) and proprioceptive (comforting pressure). An idea for each: a soft blanket or stuffed animal, a hot chocolate, photos of vacations, comforting music, lavender or eucalyptus oil, a small swing or rocking chair, a weighted blanket. A journal, an inspirational book, or a mandala coloring book is wonderful, bubbles to blow or blowing watercolor on paper through a straw are visually appealing as well as work on controlled breath. Mint gum, Listerine strips, ginger ale, frozen Starburst, ice packs, and cold are also good for anxiety regulation. For children, it is great to help them create a self-regulation comfort box (often a shoe-box or bin they can decorate) that they can use on the ready for first-aid when overwhelmed.

8. Spend extra time playing with children. Children will rarely communicate how they are feeling, but will often make a bid for attention and communication through play. Don’t be surprised to see therapeutic themes of illness, doctor visits, and isolation play through. Understand that play is cathartic and helpful for children—it is how they process their world and problem solve, and there’s a lot they are seeing and experiencing in the now.

9. Give everyone the benefit of the doubt, and a wide berth. A lot of cooped up time can bring out the worst in everyone. Each person will have moments when they will not be at their best. It is important to move with grace through blowups, to not show up to every argument you are invited to, and to not hold grudges and continue disagreements. Everyone is doing the best they can to make it through this.

10. Everyone find their own retreat space. Space is at a premium, particularly with city living. It is important that people think through their own separate space for work and for relaxation. For children, help them identify a place where they can go to retreat when stressed. You can make this place cozy by using blankets, pillows, cushions, scarves, beanbags, tents, and “forts”. It is good to know that even when we are on top of each other, we have our own special place to go to be alone.

11. Expect behavioral issues in children, and respond gently. We are all struggling with disruption in routine, none more than children, who rely on routines constructed by others to make them feel safe and to know what comes next. Expect increased anxiety, worries and fears, nightmares, difficulty separating or sleeping, testing limits, and meltdowns. Do not introduce major behavioral plans or consequences at this time—hold stable and focus on emotional connection.

12. Focus on safety and attachment. We are going to be living for a bit with the unprecedented demand of meeting all work deadlines, homeschooling children, running a sterile household, and making a whole lot of entertainment in confinement. We can get wrapped up in meeting expectations in all domains, but we must remember that these are scary and unpredictable times for children. Focus on strengthening the connection through time spent following their lead, through physical touch, through play, through therapeutic books, and via verbal reassurances that you will be there for them in this time.

13. Lower expectations and practice radical self-acceptance. This idea is connected with #12. We are doing too many things in this moment, under fear and stress. This does not make a formula for excellence. Instead, give yourself what psychologists call “radical self acceptance”: accepting everything about yourself, your current situation, and your life without question, blame, or pushback. You cannot fail at this—there is no roadmap, no precedent for this, and we are all truly doing the best we can in an impossible situation.

14. Limit social media and COVID conversation, especially around children. One can find tons of information on COVID-19 to consume, and it changes minute to minute. The information is often sensationalized, negatively skewed, and alarmist. Find a few trusted sources that you can check in with consistently, limit it to a few times a day, and set a time limit for yourself on how much you consume (again 30 minutes tops, 2-3 times daily). Keep news and alarming conversations out of earshot from children—they see and hear everything, and can become very frightened by what they hear.

15. Notice the good in the world, the helpers. There is a lot of scary, negative, and overwhelming information to take in regarding this pandemic. There are also a ton of stories of people sacrificing, donating, and supporting one another in miraculous ways. It is important to counter-balance the heavy information with the hopeful information.

16. Help others. Find ways, big and small, to give back to others. Support restaurants, offer to grocery shop, check in with elderly neighbors, write psychological wellness tips for others—helping others gives us a sense of agency when things seem out of control.

17. Find something you can control, and control the heck out of it. In moments of big uncertainty and overwhelm, control your little corner of the world. Organize your bookshelf, purge your closet, put together that furniture, group your toys. It helps to anchor and ground us when the bigger things are chaotic.

18. Find a long-term project to dive into. Now is the time to learn how to play the keyboard, put together a huge jigsaw puzzle, start a 15 hour game of Risk, paint a picture, read the Harry Potter series, binge watch an 8-season show, crochet a blanket, solve a Rubix cube, or develop a new town in Animal Crossing. Find something that will keep you busy, distracted, and engaged to take breaks from what is going on in the outside world.

19. Engage in repetitive movements and left-right movements. Research has shown that repetitive movement (knitting, coloring, painting, clay sculpting, jump roping etc) especially left-right movement (running, drumming, skating, hopping) can be effective at self-soothing and maintaining self-regulation in moments of distress.

20. Find an expressive art and go for it. Our emotional brain is very receptive to the creative arts, and it is a direct portal for release of feeling. Find something that is creative (sculpting, drawing, dancing, music, singing, playing) and give it your all. See how relieved you can feel. It is a very effective way of helping kids to emote and communicate as well!

21. Find lightness and humor in each day. There is a lot to be worried about, and with good reason. Counterbalance this heaviness with something funny each day: cat videos on YouTube, a stand-up show on Netflix, a funny movie—we all need a little comedic relief in our day, every day.

22. Reach out for help—your team is there for you. If you have a therapist or psychiatrist, they are available to you, even at a distance. Keep up your medications and your therapy sessions the best you can. If you are having difficulty coping, seek out help for the first time. There are mental health people on the ready to help you through this crisis. Your children’s teachers and related service providers will do anything within their power to help, especially for those parents tasked with the difficult task of being a whole treatment team to their child with special challenges. Seek support groups of fellow home-schoolers, parents, and neighbors to feel connected. There is help and support out there, any time of the day—although we are physically distant, we can always connect virtually.

23. “Chunk” your quarantine, take it moment by moment. We have no road map for this. We don’t know what this will look like in 1 day, 1 week, or 1 month from now. Often, when I work with patients who have anxiety around overwhelming issues, I suggest that they engage in a strategy called “chunking”—focusing on whatever bite-sized piece of a challenge that feels manageable. Whether that be 5 minutes, a day, or a week at a time—find what feels doable for you, and set a time stamp for how far ahead in the future you will let yourself worry. Take each chunk one at a time, and move through stress in pieces.

24. Remind yourself daily that this is temporary. It seems in the midst of this quarantine that it will never end. It is terrifying to think of the road stretching ahead of us. Please take time to remind yourself that although this is very scary and difficult, and will go on for an undetermined amount of time, it is a season of life and it will pass. We will return to feeing free, safe, busy, and connected in the days ahead.

25. Find the lesson. This whole crisis can seem sad, senseless, and at times, avoidable. When psychologists work with trauma, a key feature to helping someone work through said trauma is to help them find their agency, the potential positive outcomes they can effect, the meaning and construction that can come out of destruction. What can each of us learn here, in big and small ways, from this crisis? What needs to change in ourselves, our homes, our communities, our nation, and our world?

(x)

[damienxsheppard]

Fearless Night ll Evelyn & Damien

Timing: A few weeks back

Location: A dark street in White Crest

Parties: @thronesofshadows & @damienxsheppard

Description: Evelyn and Damien chance upon each other for a midnight meeting. 

How had he managed to get so turned around? Damien blamed it on the bar. It had been his first time there, and likely his last. He’d left without a scratch on him, which was a little disappointing, and with the taste of a light and hoppy ale stuck in the back of this throat. Damien dug into his coat pocket and retrieved a pack of cigarettes, plucking one from the carton and planting it between his lips. He’d been in the process of trying to light the thing, his focus trapped between his cupped hands as he tried to block the wind, when he rounded the corner and ran right into someone. Instinctively, Damien reached out, fingers snared into the clothing of the woman he’d just knocked into and not too kindly kept her upright. He wasn’t typically a gentle man and hadn’t adjusted his grip to spare wrinkling her clothing. The force of his shoulder that had crashed against her and ice on the sidewalk might have led to the woman falling right on her ass and for a brief moment Damien almost wished he had let it  happen. She had inadvertently, stepped on his cigarette and broken it. That was his last one. He sighed, feeling a little defeated from the evening, before he turned his attention to the stranger. Finally, Damien released his hold on her, “are you alright there?”

Though she preferred to spend her evenings with Miriam, Evelyn was acutely aware that she did still have to feed. She also knew that it didn’t always have to be when someone was asleep, but as her mother’s journals had first confirmed - and as Melanie had reminded her any number of times - that was what was best, they had both said. Thankfully, East End was well populated and she’d been able to feed off of someone - not anyone who she’d known before, but that was just as well - because feeding on specific people too many times could do her more harm than good in the long run. She’d left one particular home, slipping unnoticed through the walls and making her way back to Miriam’s home. Except that she wasn’t entirely paying attention - which she knew happened sometimes after feeding, something that she’d tried so often to work to stay away from, but something that she found herself lapsing into, on occasion. Which meant that she didn’t notice the man who ran into her and grabbed her arm. For a moment, she tried to pull away from him but just as soon as he’d grabbed her he let her go and she adjusted her posture. “I am quite alright, yes.” She looked down at the toe of her boot (she’d opted to wear fewer heels when around Miriam was around, but if she was out to feed, it felt better - gave her more power over the humans that she fed from, let her feel in control - something that she oddly didn’t feel the need to be around Miriam). “Are you? I - my apologies if I stepped on that.” Though you know, those things will kill you fast and there’s already so much in this town that could do that. “You are out late.” She stated, tone flat. “Coming from somewhere?”

Damien attempted to stifle the disappointment that beld forward as he looked at the broken cigarette, it wasn’t her fault he knew, but he couldn’t help but crave one right about now. He’d just have to swing by some store on the way back home, surely a few would be open at this hour. “The bar,” Damien answered plainly, he didn’t see why it mattered where he’d been, it wasn't like he was late to some meeting. “A shit one at that. I might have expected to see a beer rank in $13 in the city but that brew wasn’t even worth a damn penny.” He didn’t ask about where she’d come from because it wasn’t any of his damn business, just like he refrained from telling her she shouldn’t be out at this hour, because here she was anyway. Damien couldn’t deny he was curious though. “Where are you heading? Maybe we can go together,” he didn’t need the company, while White Crest boasted its mortality rate Damien wasn’t afraid to traverse its streets alone. Maybe he should have with all the creatures in town fully capable of bringing him to a swift end, ignorance of the supernatural brought him some bliss. “Unless you prefer to go alone?”

“I mean, bars are open late around here. Or - well, bars are establishments that are open late.” Evelyn shrugged. “I own one - The Artesian - though we are not usually open up until the early hours of the morning.” At least not unless we were paid a lot. “My drinks do cost more than thirteen dollars but I can promise you that my drinks are actually worth it. Too many bars are more than just a bit unsavory.” She made a face, though quickly flashed him a smile, as if to assure him that the fact of disgust hadn’t been directed at him, more far more at all the dirty bars in town. Which - if she were being entirely far - truly boiled down to Soul on The Rocks, but none of the bars were as nice as hers was, and she didn’t even care if that made her sound stuck up. “I - home.” She finally settled on, because that was easier to explain than saying ‘going to a friend’s house’. That sort of phrasing could draw out too many questions that Evelyn was not so keen to answer. “However, I could use a bit more of a walk, should you wish to accompany me for that?”

She managed to snare Damien’s attention when she claimed to own her own bar, the Artesian wasn’t the one he had just left from, admittedly he hadn’t bothered to take note of its name. Someone that had a direct source to one of his favorite settings always managed to capture his admiration, mainly because that meant they had a limitless supply of beer, which just happened to be his favorite drink. More necessary, he deemed, than water. “You know, I just might have to stop in then. Can’t say I could stay long though, not at those prices,” he doesn’t admit unsavory bars are also his favorite. High end establishments didn’t typically house the kind of entertainment he was fond of, however, Damien was hoping he’d be pleasantly surprised. “Where is it located?” Maybe he’d try another bar after this walk, but then again, he wasn’t having the best of luck tonight and he decided against testing it further. “Sure,” he turned his frame to stand beside her and began to stride forward, trying to keep in tune with her pace. Damien didn’t offer his arm or any other courteous support to the woman, he was not a gentleman and wouldn’t pretend to be, “what’s your name?”

“I will take any sort of business I can get,” Evelyn replied, a smirk crossing her face. “I appreciate you even considering it, despite the fact that my prices may be high. I can assure you it is all absolutely worth it. I cannot think of any complaints that I have had, though I always welcome the chance to better myself.” She glanced over to him. “In East End - not too far from here. I am unsure if you enjoy live piano, but my pianist is quite extraordinary, though again, given that I hired him I am biased, I suppose - but my point still stands. We also do prefer to have reservations, as we are just open Friday evenings - and then Saturdays and Sundays - but you now know the owner, so I can probably get you in without one.” Assuming you continue to play your cards right, “I’m Evelyn. What is your name?” She inquired, glancing around the street.

“What makes you so sure?” Damien inquired, she seemed to evaluate her establishment pretty highly, he was curious as to what gave it such an edge. Since moving here Damien had made a point to visit just about every bar in town, he wanted to see what each had to offer to his taste in terms of alcohol and entertainment. Only a few so far stood out. The mention of a live pianist made him suspect this bar oozed class, not the sort of place that typically welcomed a man such as himself. A small smirk twisted the wolf’s lips as he considered the image, him among the patrons rich with culture, and him; a stain in the room. His head tilted curiously, “if you take such pride in it why does it have such a limited availability?” It certainly seemed more lucrative to keep the doors open every day of the week, but maybe the cost of propping them open every day sealed them shut. “Name’s Damien, maybe you can add it to your reservation list for next week?”

“Well, I have yet to have any complaints and I provide something many other bars in town simply cannot. Elegance, if nothing else. Though The Perfect Pint does a decent job, but perhaps that is more due to the fact that it reminds me of pubs back home.” Evelyn gave a small shrug. “It has limited availability because I am quickly booked up, and the whole only being open on select days adds to the exclusivity, which many of my patrons truly appreciate.” That much she knew was true - being able to say they were a regular at such an establishment was part of the appeal. “Besides, I am not lacking in anything by only having them open some days.” Certainly not money, but stating that so explicitly was not in good form. “I might be able to.” She let a smirk cover her lips. “You know you should be careful wandering around at night.” She watched her breath form small puffs in the cold air. “I have heard many a rumor that walking around at night is not so safe, always.” She raised an eyebrow. “I suppose it is lucky that I ran into you, though thankfully my father had me trained in some self-defense when I was little.”

Elegance. A smirked tugged at Damien’s lips, he was more sure than before that he would not fit in at this establishment. The fact wouldn’t deter him however, as lavish as the interior could be and rich the guest, to him, it had alcohol. Which, if he were being honest, was the main allure. “Back home?” he turned, slightly curious, “where did you come from?” Damien couldn’t help the huff of laughter that shook his form as his partner for the evening commented on his safety. She was concerned for him, if a stranger were to review the two they might offer their support to Evelyn to get her away from him. “I wouldn’t be so concerned about me,” he let amusement soak his tone, “I’m not really a careful person, but here I am. I would be more concerned for you.” Damien’s gaze dipped to assess the woman beside him, intrigued what gave her such confidence. “I don’t know what self defense techniques your old man showed you but they must be worthy of an award if you’re not the least bit afraid to be walking around here alone.”

“England.” She bit her lip for a moment. “London, specifically, though I went to university at Cambridge.” Evelyn shrugged. “London at night might not have quite the level of mysterious things going on, but it’s still something and I will admit I sometimes went out for late-night wanders, much to my father’s chagrin.” She didn’t know the other man well enough, and so playing up the socialite side of her would likely be most beneficial - though she figured he might have assumed such, even if just from her bar’s description and the way she held herself. He wouldn’t have been entirely wrong, either - even if there was more to her than just that. “I think I am quite alright, but I appreciate your concern.” She offered him a kind, gentle smile. Perhaps too delicate for the situation, but overcompensating when playing human usually worked in her favor. “Well, he hired people to teach me, though the idea of him doing martial arts of any sort is highly amusing, so thank you for that image. I think I just do not want fear to block me from doing things, that is all.” She raised an eyebrow.

It was interesting to him how White Crest not only managed to draw in people from all over the country, but it seemed, from all over the globe as well. “You’re a long way from home,” Damien plainly mentioned, though he was more curious to ask, “how did you find out about this town then? From London.” What allure could a small town like this offer that would drive someone to catch a plane to land here? He was starting to feel like he was seeing part of the picture of this woman, elegant, collected, and successful. But everyone had a shadow, admittedly, he was curious about the rest of the picture that revealed a woman who wasn’t afraid to go out at night. Damien let a small grin grow on his lips, it was musing to think of her father from London hiring some martial arts experts to teach her how to fight with the same tenacity as a wild cat. He could accept that it was more of something practical for everyday use, “so what do you remember from your training? How to block a few punches? Disarm a man?”

“Somehow that makes me sound as though I am in the Wizard of Oz film,” Evelyn scrunched her face up for a moment. Long way from home, but that home had never been home except by name. Though, if she were entirely honest with herself, there were also many times when she’d felt completely at home, and even times when she found herself missing the buzz of the city. “A friend,” a half-stranger, “mentioned that it was beautiful, and that should I be considering moving to the states, it was well-worth considering.” They’d said how it was a safe and beautiful place for those who weren’t human, though Evelyn could hardly admit to that, not to a complete stranger. “I suppose I wanted to try out the small town life. I did go to university in Cambridge, and though that is nowhere near the size of London, it is still rather large when compared to this town.” She matched his grin with one of her own. “I can block, and I can sometimes flip people who weigh more than I do.” She’d practiced some with Alain, too, which helped. Back before everything. “I hardly would be the person to go to for training someone new but I can hold my own.” Not to mention I can bring anyone sobbing to their knees at my will. “How about yourself? Do you know any secret methods I may have the privilege of becoming knowledgeable of?”

“You’re not clicking your heels yet though, it seems. Who would watch the restaurant with you gone,” her explanation wasn’t exactly satisfactory, word of mouth hardly felt like a motivating factor to move town. Especially from London. But Damien didn’t push on the subject, really, he had no right to ask. This woman was still relatively a stranger to him and he had no ground to stand on to expect for more than her answer. Not to say he wasn’t curious. “I saw how the brochures raved about fall in Maine. Arrived a little too late to see it for myself, but maybe next year.” If he lived to see it. “Didn’t read much more than that, though the nightlife has been surprising,” Damien’s smile pulled a little more into a smirk, he turned his attention to his companion as if to indicate she was a contributing factor to the subject. “Flip people? Now that’s a little tricky. I’m half tempted to test you. Promise I won’t though, at least not tonight.” Damien mauled over his answer before finally adding, “I look for what makes people flinch, everyone is different. But if you can find out what makes people nervous in a fight, what they seem to avoid, you can press them about it. It’s usually brute force, most like a fight to be quick so they just throw their weight around. Show them that doesn’t work and they start stumbling.”

“I mean, I am distinctly not Dorothy. Never was one for gingham, you know? Plus, the hair’s all wrong.” Evelyn replied, raising an eyebrow. “Maybe if you play your cards right, I can try the whole heel clicking, we will have to see.” At the mention of fall, she couldn’t help but nod. It was an enchanting time of year. “We do get a number of tourists - well, the town does. I do not know if I can properly use the collective ‘we’ yet, even though it is coming upon five years now that I have lived here. Regardless, I hope that you stay around to see it next year. The colors are something else.” She smirked. “The nightlife is not quite what you might expect from a small town, that is certainly true.” She ran a hand through her hair and shrugged, though her lips formed a smirk to match his. “I think I should prefer for that to not be tested on pavement.” She paused, “you know, for your sake. Would not want you to get any significant injuries.” She ran her tongue over her teeth, giving an appreciative nod at his reply. That she could relate to, finding what made people nervous, what made them flinch. Her least favorite nanny had loathed frogs, and while Evelyn couldn’t get proper frogs, she’d covered her nanny’s room with photographs of it after an especially bad fight that they’d had. “I can respect that,” she replied, voice half-clipped. “Knocks them off their feet mentally, hmm?”

A short burst of laughter tore past Damien’s lips when Evelyn informed him she wouldn’t try to hurl him into the pavement, for his sake. They both knew he was not so fragile, but in the middle of the night on a walk home it wasn’t the best time to test her ability. Maybe he’d have to provide her a chance another day to showcase her skill, Damien had to appreciate how confident she was in bringing down a man of his size. “Maybe next time I see you, if there is a nice soft patch of grass, you can show me what you’re made of.” It was not a threat, his voice was edged with amusement. Damien was curious as to what made Evelyn flinch, he didn’t have a mind to test it himself but a woman who seemed to meet possible conflict with a certain poise was one he wagered was worth knowing. “Yeah, or at least in my experience, fear can be one of the best weapons. Can be used to end fights before they start, or bring them to a close shortly after they begin.” Damien didn’t have any real finess when it came to fighting, he was skilled in delivering blows and taking them, but lacked a definite style in combat. One of his best qualities was his endurance, it was something most opponents couldn’t match. “What makes you nervous?” he didn’t expect an honest answer but couldn’t help to ask, “if it isn’t possible strangers in the dead of night?”

“Perhaps we will have to make that happen.” Another smirk made its way across Evelyn’s lips at his comment. She knew that he might easily have an upper hand on her, but she also knew that she certainly wasn’t someone to be underestimated, and that if she truly wanted a win, all it would take would be looking right into his eyes to knock him off balance - though not in the way that he probably would expect. “Though somewhere besides the Common - would not want to cause too much of a ruckus, afterall.” She nodded at his next remarks - “I do not have so very much experience with fighting, despite the bits of self-defense training I have, but I can believe it. Fear is extraordinarily powerful.” She bit her tongue then, fighting away the amused look that threatened to cross her face. “What makes me nervous?” Evelyn held the words in her mouth, musing as to what would be the best way to answer - because nothing sounded too self-important even if it was true, mostly - and giving away the anxieties that she had found herself feeling and realizing more recently were not something she wished to discuss with most anyone, particularly not a stranger. “Horses - or, they did when I was a child,” she finally settled on. “I was not so fond of how large they were - despite the fact that I am a bit tall now, I was a bit of a small child, and despite my father’s wishes, I did not take so well to horseback riding.” At least, that was one way to put it. The horse was terrified of me and threw me off, giving me a scar I still have, was more accurate but not something she wished to share. “How about you?”

Damien entertained the thought of crossing paths with this woman again and being confronted where a nice little patch of grass could catch him. “You name the place, I’ll meet you there,” though he didn’t expect her to agree to it. The time they had together now felt borrowed, given only for a period of time till they met an intersection that demanded they’d separate, return to what life they had been living before passing. Damien listened when Evelyn provided an answer, horses, a grin followed her reply as she elaborated. “They are massive aren’t they? Could easily break a few bones with a kick, who wouldn’t be a little afraid of that?” For a brief second he tried to imagine a young girl trying to follow along to her lessons in horseback riding, but he didn’t know Evelyn enough to picture it clearly.

Damien hummed as the inquiry was returned to him as he considered an answer. What did make him nervous? The word failure seared in his thoughts. What would the family he’d made think of him now? What would they say about Damien becoming the very creature that had murdered them? That not only had he failed to protect them, but avenge them. The idea did cause him to flinch, in a subtle way that crinkled the skin around his eyes before he huffed out, “Commitment, prefer the lone road these days if you catch my drift,” the reply was meant to be light hearted, direct his thoughts away from where they had taken him.

The pair arrived at a crosswalk that offered two separate segments to cross, “looks like this is where I leave you,” Damien began, offering a faint smile, “I think you can manage the rest of the way yourself? Don’t spare anyone the pavement, if they cause you trouble.” 

[mypassionfortrash]

KICKS (part four)

After watching Andie and Holly play at the dungeon, you and Roger go for a drink. Their scene might have been too extreme for either of you, but it still gave Roger some ideas on playing safely and opens up a conversation about how he wants to take his exploration further. And he has an interesting proposition for you.

Warnings: Strong D/s themes; graphic descriptions of needle play and blood. STRICTLY 18+. Notes: I am LOVING all the amazing feedback on this fic – thank you so much for reading and commenting. Please keep it coming. And please, if you liked this, share it!

Catch up: Part one // Part two // Part three

Tags: @jennyggggrrr @sarahgurl09 @scorpiogemini @johnricharddeacy​ @brianssixpence​ @hellohellothere12 @crazylittlethingcalledobsession @internationalkpoplova @thefairyfellersmasterstroke @six-bloodyminutes @hannafuckingsucks​ @dancingcoolcat​ @cherries-n-rocknroll​ @theedwardscollection​ @inthelapofrogertaylor​ @lnnuend0​

Tension radiated from Roger’s body by the end of Andie and Holly’s scene. You and Roger observed the whole thing from behind a two-way mirror. Every so often, Roger’s eyes would bulge, or his teeth would sink into his knuckle. He was on the edge of his seat from start to finish. He didn’t make a sound.

The show concluded with Andie forcing a series of mind-bending orgasms through Holly’s body with a Hitachi wand as she plucked a series of needles from her labia, which were spread in a clamped metal ring. Holly writhed against the industrial straps around her wrists, her waist and her thighs, but she just couldn’t evade Andie’s onslaught. With every wave, the edge of the table dripped with Holly’s arousal. The sheer amount of pleasure left her chest heaving and soaked in sweat. And when it became too much to handle, all Holly could do was gasp one word. “Red.”

Andie backed off with the wand and immediately undid Holly’s restraints. Too tired to move at first, Holly lay on the table trying to catch her breath as Andie fussed over her. Andie stroked her hair and dabbed away the blood on Holly’s skin with cotton swabs which eventually turned to ice packs to thwart any bruising or swelling.

Holly was so unsteady when she sat up that Andie had to prop her upright. A scarlet glow had engulfed her pale skin, and the muscles in her thighs still seemed to spasm. She needed time to adjust.

You leaned into Roger, lips close to his ear. “I think we should leave, give them some privacy.”

Roger’s eyes flicked to you in the darkness. “Ok.”

You and Roger didn’t roam far from Doxy, holing yourselves up in the bar across the street. Roger couldn’t contain his thoughts on what he had just witnessed. The grin on his face just grew and grew as the words poured out, recounting what Andie and Holly did. “And Holly,” Roger concluded, leaning back in his seat. “Holly fucking took it like a champ!”

A perky voice pierced through Roger’s assessment. “I really did, didn’t I?” Holly chirped, scooting into your booth beside Roger.

“It was amazing!” Roger beamed. “How are you feeling after all of that?”

“Really, really tired. Andie and I are just grabbing a drink while we wait for our taxis. Mind if we join you?” She said, glancing at you.

“By all means,” you said. “I’m sure Roger’s full of questions for you.”

Roger smiled and seemed to turn in on himself when Holly focused on him.

“Hit me!”

“That’s my job!” Andie said, putting their drinks down on the table and sitting down next to you.

“Oh, hello! Why were you saying, ‘yellow’ a lot? I kind of know what ‘red’ means, but what does ‘yellow’ mean?”

“We use a traffic light system, so when I’m approaching my limit in terms of pain or intensity, I can just say it, and Andie can drop things right back and slow down for a while. Red’s more when I want things to stop. It doesn’t need to be because of pain, either. Back there, I was pretty close to blacking out. Andie’s pretty careful, but it’s always important to use your safe word just in case.”

Andie nodded: “Some people might use one, but for more intense and longer sessions, traffic lights are better.”

“And when you’re using gags, you can give your submissive something to hold. A set of keys or something with a bit of weight is perfect,” you added. “If it gets too much, they can drop it. They might even do it subconsciously or by accident. But that’s a chance to check in with them.”

“So even though you’re having all of that done to you, you’re really in control?” Roger pressed.

“Yeah,” Holly said. “Before Andie and I started doing this on a regular basis, we made sure that we both set limits.”

“And we won’t try anything new without talking about it first,” Andie said. “The content of a scene should never be a surprise. It should be the way it’s executed – that should surprise.”

“How do you cope with the pain?” Roger asked, blinking at Andie and Holly. “Doesn’t that hurt, having the needles… downstairs?”

“When I’m not doing this, I’m a nurse,” Andie smiled, taking a sip of her wine. “But I’ve been doing both for over a decade. It’s just experience. I know how to place the needles so that Holy doesn’t bleed too much or it doesn’t hurt too much, and it won’t do her any damage. But the key is to get Holly into a headspace where she’s so turned on and excited right before you take them out.”

“It feels so good! And doesn’t hurt afterwards,” Holly chimed in. “Throw an ice pack on it, and I’m good to go!”

“Just don’t play with needles if you’re only starting out,” Andie cautioned.

Roger was in awe of Andie and Holly, listening intently to what they had to say, but you could tell he was growing impatient to have you all to himself. Every now and again, his eyes would dart your way. 

Holly noticed this and kicked Andie’s shin underneath the table, tilting her head towards the door.

“I think that’s our taxis out there,” Andie said, squinting through the window next to you.

“We’d better get going,” Holly said. “It was lovely meeting you, Roger!”

“Look after this one,” Andie giggled as she stood up. Her hand fell on your shoulder. “Don’t break her heart, Roger.”

Roger wore a wonderstruck expression long after Andie and Holly left the pub.

“How are you feeling?” you asked.

Roger rubbed his chin, studying you from beneath his eyelashes. “It’s all very exciting.”

“I remember that feeling. So you quite liked the medical thing, then?”

“I think studying dentistry sickened me off all of that,” he said, taking a swig of vodka. “But Andie and Holly do it well.”

“Didn’t know you studied that,” you said.

“Yeah! Hated every bloody second of it!”

“I’m not into all of that either. But there’s a world of things you could try.”

Roger looked up, his eyes moving in the air between and above you as he thought. “I just wonder how it starts. How people decide they want this?”

You spoke slowly, considering every word. “I think for me, it was a good way of developing a bit of strength. It sounds counterintuitive, but if I’m stressed, feeling some pain really cleansed me and made me better at dealing with life outside of play.”

“So it helped you cope in a way?”

“Yeah, it’s a nice way to hit the reset button. If you can take all of your negativity and cut it all off at the end of a scene. Some people like to learn discipline through it. Some people like knowing that someone else is making the hard decisions for them. Your reasons for wanting this are going to be completely different from someone else’s. And that’s ok.”

“I guess I always feel really guilty when I go away on tour. It’s always excess. Don’t get me wrong, I love touring. Love the shows and the parties. But I have a hard time reigning it in when it comes to girls,” he smiled. “I can’t keep doing that. I’m ashamed of how I am sometimes.”

“I think all of this could help you form better habits and see pleasure differently,” you began, leaning forward in your seat. “But along with that, you might have to do a bit of soul searching about why you do what you do. That’s not a kinky thing. It’s a you thing. How do you feel about not being allowed to come or have sex?”

Roger’s eyes lit up, but the colour drained from his pretty face. “I can’t imagine doing that.”

“It might be something to think about. Every time you think about having sex with someone, you could sneak off, have a little wank... And then ruin it. Condition yourself to think differently.”

Roger bit his lip. Intrigue had him leaning over the table, listening that bit more intently.

“You could be punished every time you allow yourself to come. Rewarded for how many days you manage to be good.”

His tongue poked out and brushed over his lower lip where he had just bitten. “What…” he stammered, “What kind of punishment are we talking?”

You shrugged. “That’s something you need to figure out what you’d be ok with.”

“And what are you into?”

You sighed, hooking your fingertips on the edge of the table. “When I’m in charge, I like very sensual things. Nothing lewd or filthy. A little bit of spanking. Making someone come so much that they’re shaking for hours afterwards and they beg me to stop. I love knowing that they trust me to push them. There’s something really fulfilling about it,” you smiled.

Roger was halfway towards lifting his glass to his lips when he paused. “And when you’re not in charge?”

Your stomach sank. “It doesn’t happen very often.” Suddenly your mouth felt like the Sahara. You desperately drained your glass and let the alcohol warm your chest. Dutch courage. “It’s the complete opposite. I have a bit of a humiliation kink. It comes from a fucking awful place, but it feels so cathartic. I get off on it. But it’s hard to put myself in that position and get in that headspace.”

“Does it feel safer for you to be more dominant?”

You nodded. “It builds my confidence and makes me feel more powerful and comfortable in my own skin. But also I think I know how to not be a bad one, if you know what I mean? I’ve had doms in the past who’ve just blown past all my limits. You can’t abuse someone’s trust like that. I know how that feels.”

The conversation hit a lull between you and Roger. He knew that your words came from a place of pain, but he didn’t know the specifics. The only way he could offer you comfort was with his hand, stretching out to meet your own. 

“That’s why you need to find the right person for things like this. Someone who’ll respect your boundaries.” Your fingers linked with his for the second time that evening. The pads on his fingertips bled warmth into your skin as they massaged your knuckles and traced every vein they found. Exploring. “What do you think your limits would be?” you asked.

“I don’t know,” he sighed, unable to rip his gaze from your hands. “I don’t want to be blindfolded. Or have needles stuck in me. There must be some other things out there that I haven’t thought of,” he half-laughed.

“We sell entire workbooks on that,” you giggled. 

Roger waved his hand through the air: “One thousand and one weird fetishes you’ve never heard of!”

“You’re not far off!”

“Might have to buy it and see!”

“Can’t wait to look at your answers to some of them.”

When Roger stopped laughing, his face fell into a sweet, contented smile. “I think you’d be amazing.”

“Hm?”

“At showing me the ropes… quite literally.”

“Oh you’d love to see my ropes, wouldn’t you?” you taunted, trying to cling to your cool exterior.

“As it happens, I would. Another drink?”

“I think I need it!”

You kept your eyes on Roger as he walked over to the bar. His mannerisms. The way he carried himself. Everything about him was so boyish and elegant at the same time. And he had the prettiest rasp to his voice. You would’ve been lying if you said you hadn’t imagined him tied up and begging you for release.

“I’ll do it,” you blurted the second Roger returned. 

He raised his eyebrows as he slipped back into the booth.

Your voice quietened. “If you’ll let me.”

“Really?” he asked, leaning forward. “You really want to?”

“I’ll show you everything you want me to. But I have three rules.”

“I’m listening.”

You counted each out on your fingers, stating your terms like they formed a legally binding contract between the two of you. “No kissing. No touching me unless I ask you to. And no penetrative sex.”

Roger’s smile fell slightly. “You mean I can’t even touch you?”

You seized both of Roger’s hands. “Not unless I ask you to. It goes both ways, and I need you to promise me you’ll abide by that. I told you I liked to keep kink and sex separate. Promise me you will, and I’ll give you everything I’ve got.”

Roger took a deep breath and weighed up his options with his mouth hanging open.

You swore it felt like an eternity. The knots that formed in your gut grew tighter and tighter. Until…

“Ok.”

“Really?” you asked, taken aback.

“I’m up for this.”

“Oh, thank god!”

“Thank you.”

>>NEXT>>