#I actually wrote this in 2022 so it's an older piece

[peaches2217]

Regarding a Certain Panda's Nightmares

AO3 Link!

~~~

“I just… I keep having these nightmares, y’know? Real stupid stuff.” Po scoffed and tried to pass it off as a laugh, as if that alone could convince Tigress — maybe himself, too — that those dreams were as meaningless as he wished they were. “It’s always the same. Like… it’s snowing, but there’s fire everywhere, and I hear screaming all over the place, but I feel fine. I’m not cold if I touch the snow and I don’t burn if I touch the fire.”

The smile he gave Tigress was empty, and his eyes, though glancing between the cabinets, the table, and her, were somewhere on the other side of China.

A part of him truly did die there, she found herself thinking, though she forced the thought from her head at once. 

“That’s, uh, that’s usually all there is to it.” Po propped an elbow on the table in the unlit kitchen and rested his cheek on his fist, looking over Tigress’ shoulder at an ever-darkening nothing. “Sometimes it ends pretty quickly. Sometimes I see bodies and, uh, blood ‘n’ stuff. And sometimes I just hear the screaming, and then eventually I don’t hear anything anymore.” He shrugged. “But tonight’s the first time I actually…”

He swallowed heavily and tried half-heartedly to hide it behind his cup of tea. It was still full, but it had long since gone cold.

Tigress glanced down at his paw as he set it back on the table. His claws had grown out. Nothing drastic, and nowhere near as sharp as hers, but the usually blunted tips were reaching a point. He used the tip of his index claw to trace meaningless patterns into the birch.

“She, uh… she recognized me. Called me her little lotus flower. Said I’d gotten so big. But it was like, right in the middle of the, uh… the attack. So that was weird.”

Po looked down at his teacup, maybe observing his reflection in the cooled liquid. He looked so tired. Not the kind of tired brought about by a single sleepless night; no, this was just one of many in the past three weeks. 

“Tried telling her to run. Tried getting her to run with me, y’know, but… she said that, uh, well, my story didn’t have a happy beginning, but she was… uh, she was happy with the way hers ended. Told me she was proud of me. Then I woke up.” He blinked a few times, then his shoulders lifted, like his departed soul was returning to his body. “Just a real stupid dream, y’know? Borderline wish fulfillment. I mean, who would say something like that, right? I know she wouldn’t say that.”

“Do you?”

“I don’t know, but like… how do you die and then say you’re okay with it? I wouldn’t be okay with dying like that, especially if it was because…"

And his eyes grew glossy again, going someplace that Tigress, try though she might, couldn’t reach.

“Y’know, I-I don’t know how many… I mean, dozens? Hundreds, thousands? However many, it’s too many. And they’re all, uh, they’re all dead.” Po smacked his lips and shrugged again. “Because of me.”

“Po. You were a child. Nothing you could have done would have stopped it.” 

Tigress kept her voice low, in part to ensure she didn’t wake their teammates sleeping just a few rooms over, and in part so that he didn’t startle and back down. Any semblance of judgment or any suggestion that he had upset her with his words, and Po would apologize and thank her for listening and go back to his room to feign sleep until the morning gong rung. 

For someone so hell-bent on being open and friendly with everyone he met, he was fiercely self-reliant. That much they at least had in common.

“Well,” and Po smiled ruefully as he spoke, “maybe if I was never born…”

Tigress bit her tongue so sharply she tasted blood, because that was all she could do to keep from shutting him down. No, scolding him for such harmful thoughts would get them nowhere, not yet, not right now. “You think things might be different then?” she ventured instead.

“Can’t wipe out all the pandas if you never get told a panda’s gonna kick your butt one day. And that can’t happen if the panda who’s supposed to kick your butt doesn’t exist.”

Tigress averted her gaze to the tabletop as well, breathing as deeply and steadily as her cracked ribs would allow. Though Po had always, to some extent, carried feelings of resentment towards himself, they had never run this deep.

Or if they had, he’d simply never told her. Tigress preferred to think the former was the truth.

“Fate works in odd ways,” she said at last, slowly, thinking and then re-thinking each word before they left her mouth. “We can’t stop it, and we can’t control it. I’m inclined to believe that your absence wouldn’t have changed anything.”

For a moment, Po didn’t respond, just kept staring blankly at the table. Were it not for the minute shifting of his eyes, Tigress would have thought he hadn’t heard her.

“...you think?” Something in the way he asked it, maybe the way his voice fluttered or his brows lifted and scrunched, suggested that he was really considering her words. That was a good sign, at least.

“If it wasn’t you, it would have been someone else.”

“But it wouldn’t have been me.”

“People would still be dead, but the Valley wouldn’t have its Dragon Warrior. That would just ensure even more deaths.”

“Maybe the other panda woulda been the Dragon Warrior. Beat Tai Lung, brought peace, kept everyone safe.”

“But we’ll never know, will we? Because you were born, and this life is yours alone.” 

At that, Po nodded, though his face betrayed his despondency. 

I wouldn’t be okay with dying like that, he’d said only minutes earlier. But Tigress knew better. If given no other option, he’d happily die to protect others, especially the ones he held dear.

A tickle in the back of her throat made her cough, lightly, but enough to send a sharp pain through her chest.

A death wish in exchange for the safety and happiness of their loved ones. That was something else they had in common, for sure.

“For what it’s worth…” Tigress mulled over her thoughts for a brief moment. Would someone just like him have come along had he never entered the world? Perhaps. Perhaps the days at the Jade Palace would still be made lighter, and perhaps the meals they shared would still be just as flavorful, and perhaps she would still have found comfort and joy when she had long since given up on such things being part of her life.

But it would still be a world without Po. And such a world was a world Tigress didn’t want to think about, much less be a part of.

“I’m glad that you were born,” was what she finally decided on. “And I know for a fact I’m only one of many who feels that way.”

Po smiled down at his paws. It was small, barely enough to be called a smile, really. But it was warm, genuine, almost alien yet achingly familiar.

“I’m… I’m glad you were born too.”

At that, Tigress smiled in turn.

They didn’t really say much after that. They sat in shared silence until the darkness lightened with the impending dawn, at which point Tigress suggested they at least try to rest, if only for an hour or so. And though these all-nighters had become routine over the past weeks, when Po bid Tigress a good night (“Er, uh— good morning, early morning, I guess”) and ducked his head in thanks, she noticed he looked less tired than he had since they’d returned to the Valley.

It wasn’t some miraculous recovery. But little by little, her best friend was returning.

The thought dulled the pain of her broken bones and quieted her racing thoughts, and it made an hour of sleep feel like a slow and blissful eternity.

[a1nsl3yyy]

sorry for this long rant but i need to know if anyone else feels the same way.

(i wrote this when i was in class lmaoo)

bro, tell me why i’m actually about to cry. i saw hayden announced new merch dropping next week, and i got so hyped. i was reading through the comments, and apparently, she’s bringing back some of her older designs too. that’s when i started really thinking about her music—the vibe, the layers of instruments, the lyrics, the meanings, everything. i got so emotional i literally started tearing up.

maybe it’s because i have the absolute worst fomo. i found ethel in august, around the end of the preacher’s daughter era. when i first discovered her and got into her music, i felt this instant spark, this deep connection to her art, like she was saying things i’d been waiting to hear. and what i think is getting me down is that i missed out on seeing her grow and release the albums that shaped her into the artist she is now. i’m insanely proud of her and just want to celebrate every part of her journey. she pours her heart into her work and deserves all the spotlight she gets, if not more.

i mean, i’m only 14—i was 12 for most of 2022. i just hate joining in the middle of something, feeling like i missed out on so much. i’d see old tumblr and instagram posts from people who were there for PD before it even dropped, celebrating streaming milestones, and i’d scroll through reddit threads filled with lore and theories.

i don’t normally feel this way about artists. i actually haven’t ever felt this way before. she’s the first artist i genuinely wish i’d been there for from the start. the fact that i wasn’t makes me feel a little upset, almost unworthy of listening now, like i missed being part of something truly special.

anyways… hayden’s work is so rich and beautifully crafted, not just with PD but across all her albums, EPs, and singles. every piece is incredibly thought out. she has such an extraordinary mind and such a beautiful way with words, and there isn’t a single song by her that i don’t love with everything in me. i absolutely cannot wait to see what she does with perverts.

[foxes-that-run]

But Daddy I Love Him

Daddy I love him is an Ariel quote, when Ariel gives up her voice for love. Taylor has given up love for her voice (career), but also not spoken up for what she wants most. But Daddy I Love Him is a continuation of a theme of how fame and fandoms have affected Taylor's personal life. What I love about this song is it sounds like an older Taylor Swift song, she embraces a country sound and speaks her mind.

While the parallels to the reaction to a relationship in May 2023 can be seen, this overlooks much of her experience with this behaviour. I don't mean to say it is not an element, but it is far from a complete story to say it is about ending a 3 week relationship with someone about whom she also said "And I'll forget you, but I'll never forgive" on the same record.

In her NYU Graduation address in May 2022 Taylor had part of the concept in this already swirling in her mind, a full year before she dated Matty Healy:

Having journalists write in-depth, oftentimes critical, pieces about who they perceive me to be made me feel like I was living in some weird simulation, but it also made me look inward to learn about who I actually am. Having the world treat my love life like a spectator sport in which I lose every single game was not a great way to date in my teens and twenties, but it taught me to protect my private life fiercely. Being publicly humiliated over and over again at a young age was excruciatingly painful but it forced me to devalue the ridiculous notion of minute by minute, ever fluctuating social relevance and likability. 

What Taylor is referring to is the treatment by the media and fandoms throughout her career, but this was never more of an issue than 2012-2014. Nothing is a terrifying as a teenager on fledgeling social media. This TikTok creator describes it perfectly:

From tabloids, twitter, tumblr, even people who looked like Taylor were abused.

So yes, Harry has had and worn t-Shirt with the song title for years, and yes they have both dressed up as Ariel. But that is not all that makes this song about Taylor loosing her love over fan behaviour... it's because she did. She lost the love she wrote 1989 including "This love left a permanent mark / This love is glowing in the dark"  about. And it continues today, there are a lot of people who still call Harry's partners vile names and think it is OK to treat others poorly because they suggest he could care for someone. I think anyone who's read this far knows exactly what I mean, probably first hand.

This affected Taylor the point the Clean Speeches on the 1989 Tour were on this topic, every night she talked about bullying, self worth and holding onto love.

The 'Daddy' is not just the fans and media, but probably her team also. I think the varied shapes in the CDs are to show this comes in many forms and roles, not just one experience. As Taylor said to Rolling Stone in 2014 before 1989 was released:

Lyrics

[Verse 1] I forget how the West was won I forget if this was ever fun I just learned these people only raise you To cage you Sarahs and Hannahs in their Sunday best Clutching their pearls, sighing, “What a mess” I just learned these people try and save you ‘Cause they hate you

For the international fans like myself 'How the West was Won' is a 1960's film about American colonisation. I think the opening 2 lines do 2 things, place us in a country setting and also tell us Taylor cares more about speaking her mind than what may be higher bigger goals.

The second half of this verse goes on to set out that it is fans who are approaching her love lost as trauma porn, and I am here for it.

I also note the cage reference, Taylor (and Harry) have a long theme of being caged or trapped by fame, she has a literal cage in her Nashville apartment, he has a cage tattoo and they have used cage, glass boxes, fishbowls, snowglobe imagery. Here she points out the fans are not really there for her, they are seeking to control her.

[Pre-Chorus 1] Too high a horse for a simple girl To rise above it They slammed the door on my whole world The one thing I wanted

The pre-chorus furthers that the final straw has been broken, she's been cornered by fans to give up something she cares for.

Vigante Shit "Ladies always rise above / Ladies know what people want / Someone sweet and kind and fun /The lady simply had enough"

Is It Over Now? "I was hoping you’d be there and say the one thing I’ve been wanting, but no"

That is the only time Taylor has sung about ‘wanting one thing' before. This also reminds me of the Delicate Behind the Scenes, where she said she got a note from a lover and wants to be with him but realises 'it can never be him'

[Chorus] Now I’m running with my dress unbuttoned Scrеaming, “But, Daddy, I love him I’m having his baby” No, I’m not, but you should see your faces I’m telling him to floor it through thе fences No, I’m not coming to my senses I know he’s crazy, but he’s the one I want

In the chorus Taylor acts out a churlish child yelling at a father. The 'daddy' is many roles, her actual parents, fans, media and probably record company and PR people who told her she could be with the one she loved, throughout her life. She says the matching line to Harry's Kiwi, which has the same meaning.

Taylor 'floors it through the fences, fed up and unwilling to listen. This is great imagery, to break through fences, and also as metaphorical fences that have been placed around what considered acceptable for her. Cars are also a Haylor theme, including Run below and often used as a metaphor for their love escaping as it is here. (All I know is that you drove us off the road / Let’s get out of this town, drive out of the city, away from the crowds)

Is It Over Now?: Was it over when he unbuttoned my blouse?

Run: And my so-called friends, they don’t know I’d drive away before I let you go

In Kiwi Harry yells a tabloid line followed with it's none of your business. In his Harry's House ONO complete with pointing at the camera and crowd. Taylor also referenced these same tabloids headlines in the Reputation magazine.

Kiwi "I'm having your baby / It's none of your business"

[Verse 2] Dutiful daughter, all my plans were laid Tendrils tucked into a woven braid Growing up precocious sometimes means Not growing up at all He was chaos, he was revelry Bedroom eyes like a remedy Soon enough, the elders had convened Down at the city hall

In the second verse Taylor establishes that she has gone everything asked of her:

Style - "I got that good girl faith and a tight little skirt"

Style - "So it goes, he can’t keep his wild eyes on the road"

Yet is denied freedom and the elders decree the match is unsuitable. I think the elders are her team. She describes the muse as chaos and revelry. This is very reminiscent of the I Knew You Were Trouble introduction poem, but while in 2012 Taylor was contrite and said it was too much she now revels in the revelry:

"And the crazy thing is I don't know if I'm ever gonna feel that way again, but I don't know if I should. I knew his world moved too fast and burned too bright, but I just thought, how can the devil be pulling you toward someone who looks so much like an angel when he smiles at you? Maybe he knew that when he saw me. I guess I just lost my balance. I think that the worst part of it all wasn't losing him it was losing me"

[Pre-Chorus 2] “Stay away from her” The saboteurs protested too much Lord knows the words we never heard Just screeching tires and true love

The 'daddy' has now forbidden the love, this is reminiscent of Love Story: "And my daddy said, “Stay away from Juliet”

[Chorus] And I’m running with my dress unbuttoned Screaming, “But, Daddy, I love him I’m having his baby” No, I’m not, but you should see your faces I’m telling him to floor it through the fences No, I’m not coming to my senses I know he’s crazy, but he’s the one I want

'Crazy' and Madness are a Haylor theme, particularly in the Blank Space music video, and these lyrics

Wonderland "And in the end, in Wonderland, we both went mad"

Kiwi "She's driving me crazy, but I'm into it (Oh) and "It's getting crazy, I think I'm losing it, I think I'm losing it"

But many more songs:

[Post-Chorus 1] I’ll tell you something right now I’d rather burn my whole life down Than listen to one more second of all this bitching and moaning I’ll tell you something ’bout my good name It’s mine alone to disgrace I don’t cater to all these vipers dressed in empath’s clothing

I love the last line, vipers dressed in empaths clothing, that is exactly what they are.

[Bridge] God save the most judgmental creeps Who say they want what’s best for me Sanctimoniously performing soliloquies I’ll never see Thinking it can change the beat Of my heart when he touches me And counteract the chemistry And undo the destiny You ain’t gotta pray for me Me and my wild boy and all of this wild joy If all you want is gray for me Then it’s just white noise, and it’s just my choice

The only time Taylor has described someone as wild in lyrics is in Style "So it goes, he can’t keep his wild eyes on the road"

Afterglow "Chemistry until it blows up"

I love the end of the bridge, elsewhere on the record Taylor describes her long term relationship as grey, staid and boring. For many years some fans have shoehorned this person into lyrics because they want to see themselves in her, as they settle down they want her too. From my point of view some rather loud warning signs in songs were overlooked, or seen as 'she's remembering the past/when they first got together' to avoid accepting she was unhappy and wanted out.

Out of the Woods "The rest of the world was black and white But we were in screaming color"

[Verse 3] There’s a lot of people in town that I Bestow upon my fakest smiles Scandal does funny things to pride, but brings lovers closer We came back when the heat died down Went to my parents and they came around All the wine moms are still holding out But fuck ’em, it’s over

This verse is where I think it becomes clear than the 2023 lens is at best reminding Taylor of a past love, because that relationship never came back. Matty has said they never dated in 2014, there was no controversy around her attending concerts then. They dated for a few weeks then stopped talking, and of story.

However Harry and Taylor did sing about a hidden relationship for years. In fact Taylor wasn't connected to anyone else in a serious way for three years. In particular

Wildest Dreams: I said, “No one has to know what we do”

This Love "This love came back to me, oh, oh, oh"

I know places : "Somethin' happens when everybody finds out / See the vultures circling, dark clouds" and "we're bulletproof I know places (Hide) and you know for me, it's always you"

…Ready For It?: "Island breeze and lights down low, no one has to know"

I Know Places TV's lyric video for got a very TTPD themed look.

[Final Chorus] Now I’m dancing in my dress in the sun and Even my daddy just loves him I’m his lady And, oh, my God, you should see your faces Time, doesn’t it give some perspective? And, no, you can’t come to the wedding I know it’s crazy, but he’s the one I want

Taylor is asking her fans, parents, media if they have grown up, from when they were teenagers playing with her real life, do they have perspective and willing to accept that she loves someone of her choosing?

And no, they can't come to the wedding, but I bet they have Eras Tour tickets.... and some showed up at Jacks.

[logicaldelta]

This is an older writing piece from 2022 that I wrote by request from a friend :] I still really like it, so I'm sharing it here now ^^

Prompt: "York is a cuddly guy. North, his best friend, is talking to his sister and Wyoming about this, expressing how funny it is when York is demanding cuddles."

–––––

"Guys, I'm serious, York is a very cuddly person."

South clutched her stomach and pointed at her mouth, pretending to vomit. "I don't want to hear about what you and your boyfriend get up to behind closed doors, North."

"I've told you, South, he's not my boyfriend!" North laughed, feeling accomplished when he saw the amused smile on his sister's face.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." She shrugged, pretending to be disinterested in his news. "So, what were you gonna say about it?"

North clicked his fingers. "Right! York is incredibly cuddly. Like, unimaginably so. You wouldn't expect such an overconfident guy to like affection that much. But he does! He tries so hard to be the big spoon."

South snorted, looking at him with disbelief. "York? As in, 'two-feet-shorter-than-you' York?"

"He's not that much shorter than me. Maybe like... a foot and a half, at most."

"What other blackmail can you give on him?" Wyoming, who had remained silent up until now, leaned in, intrigued by the possibility of gathering information he could use against his 'enemy'.

"Well, he likes it when you run your fingers through his hair. I could've sworn that he almost purred when I did it once, but he refuses to admit it." Wyoming chuckled at this, and North smiled. "He's really needy when he wants cuddles. He'll randomly show up in my quarters and drop on the bed, demanding hugs. It's..." He clicked his fingers, looking for a word to describe it.

"Embarrassing information that you shouldn't be sharing with your sister?" South suggested, groaning as North pulled her towards him in an overdramatic side hug.

"What are big brothers for, if not for sharing embarrassing information about mutual friends?"

South shoved him away from her, rolling her eyes. "You are not my big brother."

"I so am! Mom said I was born a little before you!"

"No, she said she wasn't sure who was born first, since we were practically identical!"

"Stop spreading your lies, you villain! We all know that I'm the older twin!"

"Actually, North, I was under the impression that South was older that you." North shot Wyoming a betrayed look, and the British man grinned. "She's scarier."

"I am plenty scary, thank you very much!" North protested, and South patted his shoulder in a 'there-there' way.

"I don't mean to burst your bubble – well, actually, I do – but if anyone found you scary before, they won't now, with the knowledge that you cuddle your best friend on an almost nightly basis."

North opened his mouth, attempting to think of a rebuttal, but closed it when no words could be found. "You're... right. I did this to myself." He conceded, trying not to show his happiness at the pride that crossed South's face.

"I win!"

"Yes, you do." He laughed. "Anyway, back to the topic at hand, York gets very grumpy if he doesn't get the attention he wants. Like, remember that mission we went on that lasted a week?" South nodded. "When I got back he was so mad, it would've be entertaining if he wasn't so upset about it. He spent hours clinging to my side while I finished my mission report."

"That'd explain the typos in your report." South commented, smirking at her brother.

"See, I told you that wasn't my fault! It's hard to type with only one hand."

Wyoming was observing the exchange between the siblings, smiling in amusement at their antics. He felt as though he couldn't contribute much to the topic, instead picturing the ever-so-confident York as a whiny mess that just wanted cuddles. He laughed to himself about it, getting weird looks from the twins.

It was then that footsteps approached the group, and York dropped down next to Wyoming – albeit, leaving at least two feet of space between them. He looked at the faces of his friends, and his one enemy, before his own face scrunched up in confusion.

"What's so funny?"

Wyoming reached over the space between them to pat York on the shoulder, ignoring the look of annoyance that the other man gave him. "I'll never be able to look at Mr. Rizz the same," Wyoming commented, causing South to cackle in laughter. North had to stifle laughter himself, forcing himself to just shrug when York looked to him for answers.

"Weirdos," York commented, laughing himself as North nodded in agreement. If only he knew.

[miyoron]

Anime of 2023, a List By Miyo

Here we go again, it's 2023 and the year has gone by with another year of anime and all those kinda fun things. It felt like another year where we were encumbered with isekai stuff I mostly avoided and anime overworking its staff as always. I guess atleast there weren't any hacks that delayed Precure this time? I dunno, let's all say hello to my anime list of 2023 of shows I enjoyed or wanted to talk about some.

Past Write Ups

https://miyoron.tumblr.com/post/155146006684/miyos-anime-of-note-of-2016s

https://miyoron.tumblr.com/post/168918050454/miyos-anime-of-various-notes-2017-edition

https://miyoron.tumblr.com/post/181565753419/miyos-anime-of-note-2018-rainbow-edition

https://miyoron.tumblr.com/post/189938086634/miyos-anime-of-the-decade-though-actually-just

https://miyoron.tumblr.com/post/639065021256810496/miyos-2020-anime-extravaganza

https://miyoron.tumblr.com/post/672147095495589888/miyos-animated-things-of-note-2021-hello-and

https://miyoron.tumblr.com/post/705216685374865408/miyos-animes-of-2022-a-list-about-things-i-liked

***

As always, I use whatever version of the title I am most comfy writing. Also these aren't in any order other than sort of by release? I wrote down shows when I finished them so earlier in the year shows end up first. This is my science.

TomoChan is a Girl

This show is a fun little romcom that's about a violent girl and her childhood friend who she wants to go out with. The only problem is she's ridiculously tomboyish and violent and they've been friends so long, he legit just sees her as his bestie dude karate friend. This is the driving force for the show and expect Tomo to constantly knock Jun upside the head in response to his failing to see her romantic advances.

The show has an enjoyable cast of secondary characters besides the main ones with dour Misuzu always around to cut people down and active embodiment of chaos Carol who…well, girl is just a walking ditz meme. There's fun hidden depth there even with a show that sometimes has a problem with being a lil too horny. I liked it though, they were fun chars and thinking back on them as I write this up makes me remember them fondly.

Akiba Maid War

Akiba Maid War is one of those shows that is a spectacle over substance when you think about it. However, that spectacle is bonkers and was ridiculously fun to watch. A period piece about the fictional gang style wars of maid cafes in Akihabara, the show is a tale that's as comedic as it is violent. Newcomer Nagomi must learn the ways of maids and the high stakes battles between the maid hierarchy.

Like I said, it's a VERY silly show and ridiculously violent. Calling it a black comedy is pretty on the nose but it absolutely fits. I really don't want to say too much about it, but if you want to see maids murder each other in John Wick-esque violence then I say check it out. It even has some nice drama too amongst it all. Go do it, watch the pig maids!

Nijiyon Animation

Love Live Nijiyon I don't have too much to say on to be honest. It was more time with characters I liked and they had goofy little jokes. Wild this is getting a second season next year but hey why not?

~*~Time for the Precure Cornerrrr~*~

Hirogaru Sky Precure

This is a year of firsts for Precure. The fact the first Precures were the blue and white ones, the introduction of an adult and boy Precures who aren't just side characters in one episode..lots of wild stuff. Hero girl Sora and her bestie Mashiro are such a good pair. Tsubasa is a fun nerd and Ageha rules in the tradition of "older Precure, will kick your ass." The villains have been mostly fun, if a little underwritten. Still, I liked Wario but a pig man and shithead dweeb.

The Precure this year has been pretty solid to be honest, and the official subs have gotten a LOT better in quality so things sound way less like it's being done by some poor intern down in Toei's dungeons. Good designs, good style, pretty much a good season to start with if you're curious. Also for a while we got to see older Precures at the end for the 20th anniversary so yay~

Yes Precure 5 Go Go

So we finished the second half of the Yes 5 series and it was…fine? I still don't really like Milk and even moreso Milky Rose. She's not my least fave cure but she's up there. Coco and Nuts are still bleh and new friend Syrup was ehhhh. Really the main thing I learned to love this year was Bunbee. It's an early season though so I suppose it was still growing pains. This one (like Max Heart) probably could've just been combined into the first series as one year long show and not TWO separate ones.

Dokidoki Precure

DokiDoki Precure is an interesting one because there is a lot there to like. It's got a fun cast, some dopey villains and a good energy to it all. There's also the ugliest Precure baby I can think of so there's that. I didn't initially like Cure Ace but she grew on me over time which is funny cuz meanwhile I was all in on Regina who is just a shithead goblin (complimentary).

Like I said, it's a nice little series and I enjoyed the character a lot. Mana is a good girl who loves all of her friends and anyone she can make friends with. I think my favorite is Alice though just because she's basically Batman in Precure form, even down to the hyper competent butler. I think going into this show I was thinking it was going to be one of the lesser ones, but I liked it more than I thought I would so that's a win in the end.

Power of Hope ~ Precure Full Bloom

I'm putting this on here to complete the Precure chat and I think ultimately I was disappointed by it more than happy. Maybe I was expecting something I was never going to get, who knows. The idea of grown up Precure characters having to do their adult ass lives is an interesting one and I really did like all the designs they came up with for the older characters. But the fact they all just transformed into their older, middle schooler designs, and even used the same old footage, was just kind of a bummer for me. Honestly, it felt like a movie that was stretched out over 3 months of TV and probably could've just been that. Maybe they'll do something different when they do the Mahou Tsukai grown ups next. Also Bunbee was here too so yay.

*~*Thus Concludes Precure Corner*~*

Urusei Yatsura

With friends in tow, finally actually watched some Urusei Yatsura, or rather the 2022 remake series. It's got a lot of what I feel would become the staple Rumiko Takahashi comedy violence in it and I can see why it helped her later works. This is one of those shows where I don't know much to say about because I feel people know what it's about but…oni lady from space comes to Earth, says she's a pervy dweeb's wife and shenanigans ensue from there. A goofy cast of characters that was just an overall silly time. More to come next year!

Mobile Suit Gundam the Witch from Mercury (S2)

Not too much to add to this one since I talked about how I liked it last year, but I like where it took the story. Showing Miorine having to deal with being in charge of her dad's company while he was out injured and showing how people dealt with past traumas that affected their present lives. I mean, it's probably basic Gundam stuff, but I enjoyed it. There were a lot of good dramatic moments and one particular episode that really hit hard on the heart strings.

The ending was great and, honestly, the only problem is we only got 2 cours worth and not a whole year long show. That being said, I hope we do get to see Suletta again and not just in Super Robot Wars games. Also, don't let anyone try to tell you they aren't married at the end. That's just denying the truth.

Inu-Oh

What a cool fucking movie. Cool fucking visuals, cool fucking soundtrack. Just everything about it was a good watch. Made me feel happy, sad..just yea. A tale of friendship between a blind biwa player and a cursed-deformed dancer, it's a really lovely story with like I said..it's just really good and you should check it out. Sorry I don't have better words for this. I think I just want you to discover it for yourselves!

Skip and Loafer

Skip and Loafer is a cute little slice of life with some romance elements in it with a cute cast of characters from all walks of life. Awkward over-acheiver Mitsumi tries to make her way in the big city high school where she becomes friends with others ranging from the overly chill, but complex, Sosuke to the seemingly aloof Yuzuki. It's a nice little story that treads some of the typical high school anime things but has a lot of hidden depth behind the characters.

Like I often seem to say, it's one of those ones I wish wasn't only 12 episodes and deserves more. It even has a nice bit of LGBTQ+ representation in it with Mitsumi's Aunt Nao. Seriously, fun little show, I want more.

Oshi no Ko

Oshi no Ko was initially one I wasn't going to check out because the synopsis for it made me very confused and I thought it was JUST too weird. Let there be no mistake, it's a fucking weird premise and sometimes it gets awkward because of that. That being said, I ended up very invested in the story because I really want to know the answer to the overarching mystery of the show. Who dun it huh? Who dun it?!

This show has a lot to say about the entertainment industry, specifically the shittiness of it and I think that's ultimately a good thing. Word of warning, episode 6 and 7 are REALLY heavy and the official subs even have a warning before and after the episodes because of it. Next year there's another season incoming so I will look forward to more Memcho in our future. Also, probably one of the more hype openings this year. Yoasobi is one of my new favorite artists and I enjoy when they do stuff (they also did a G Witch opening so!)

Yohane the Parhelion: Sunshine in the Mirror

A Love Live April Fools joke that became its own actual show. What a time to be alive. This is an interesting little piece though and had some nice things going for it. As always the music and visuals were good and I like the set up of it all. Plus, I'm always happy to see the Sunshine cast in things since they're the ones I've spent the most time with.

That being said, the show's plot leaves a lot to be desired since some episodes it feels like they forgot they were supposed to have one to be honest. Still though, if you like Love Live Sunshine, you'll probably enjoy this too. Some characters act a little different but I think that's fine since they're in a different setting. Go watch it if you wanna, I dunno!

Spy x Family (S3)

Spy x Family continues its fun times from last year and I'm glad to have more of it. They even did an episode on the "Yor Gets Shot in the Ass" chapter which is a really fun and silly one. Yea it was a good time for more spy times, lots of good action set pieces and silly little moments in between. It's like a hugely popular show, I don't know what all you want me to say on this. It's fun and good!

Birdie Wing Golf Girls' Story

We finished the golf! It went even more soap opera and weird! It even felt like they did a Happy GIlmore reference unintentionally! I loved this weird stupid show. I miss it.

Scott Pilgrim Takes Off

This was an interesting one to say the least, I'm not quite done with it yet but Science Saru plus Scott Pilgrim is a fun set up. It's a complete retelling of the show and honestly I'm for it. A lot more stuff with Ramona and in the Japanese dub, Kim is played by Cure Gelato so yea. If you liked the original series, this should be on your list to check out. And if you liked the movie, all the original actors reprise their roles so bonus points.

Side Things I Enjoyed But Don't Have Much to Say On

Otaku Elf

It's a cute silly little series about a dweeb ass elf. It was fun~

Akane Banashi

This is a manga I started reading a couple months back about a girl trying to become a pro Rakugo performer to avenge her father, but also to claim her own spot in the competitive world of this Japanese art. It's a fun thing that's played really over the top like a sports/battle manga. I enjoy it, you should cheek it out!

The Magical Revolution of the Reincarnated Princess and the Genius Young Lady

A series that's ostensibly an isekai but the main character does not seem to have any knowledge of her previous life. At least, outside of vague things like "I saw a witch flying on a broom in a dream that may have been memories of a past I don't remember?? so I'm going to fly on a broom." An interesting one that didn't take the coward's way out at the end either.

So I think this is all I have to say this year? It's not much but it's my little list~ I hope you all enjoyed it~

For next year, I'm looking forward to finishing up the last old Precure season, Happiness Charge. We've also started the original Doremi so that should be fun. We also started watching Freiren so I feel that'll probably be on next year's list so watch out for that. And Dungeon Meshi is very soon too! Hope you all had a good 2023 and let's hope next year is a good one. Or atleast a non painful one.

[zahri-melitor]

Crossposting but I just finished my 2023 Fic Roundup and Analysis.

I often end up doing these late, so look at me getting this out in January for once! (Didn’t want to put it out in December while I was still publishing)

Previous years: 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022

I like to ask myself some questions about what I've written in the past year. Here's my thoughts.

Stories published: 13

Fandoms published: 3 (technically if you look at my AO3 tagged fandoms for the year it’s 8, but I’m just going to group all the DCU together).

It’s ended up being my biggest year in terms of story output; being back in a fandom which is causing me brainrot as far as prompts go and where I have a bunch of mutuals has definitely been helpful for the writing. My longest finished fic ever is now 24,306 words, and I’ve cleared 40k this year. 

In terms of my all time stats: I’ve got three new stories in my top ten as far as kudos go (at 5,7 and 9 as I write this): all the Vorkosigan has dropped below 10th now.

Most popular story: there’s an endless road to rediscover. Given how I wrote this then fussed worrying for several months over what its reception would be, I’m glad it went well, especially as it was my first time tackling Damian characterisation and I wasn’t confident with him yet. It’s doing better than I expected, ranked next to everything else. 

Favourite story written: Um. Hmmm. Part of me wants to say Orange Juice, because I just really enjoyed how fast that one came together, but really it’s the picture frames have changed and so has your name, no question. My most ambitious project, the source of so much brainrot and theorising. The day I figured out how the solution to ‘what happened to Dick’ (because that was the last big moving piece that came together to make the story work - the solution) was a wonderful one, because I kicked my feet with delight and then had to work really really hard not to reveal the secret to everyone I immediately wanted to tell how clever I was. I was SO SMUG.

Best reception: the picture frames have changed and so has your name definitely gets the award here. Everyone was super nice about it, I got to see so much theorising, it’s currently sitting on 116 comment threads, and honestly all the support to push through and get it written was worth it. Came out so good! You were all really generous!

Favourite underrated story: Tea for Two. I just like the balance of how much stuff I layered into it and that it was detailed enough I sent someone who I KNOW is hugely into No Man’s Land scurrying off to the comics to check I had got certain details correct. It was a fun write with very specific goals to hit, and stylistically exactly what I like doing. I also love the concept of the Mother’s Day series and am thinking through what additions I want to make to it in 2024. 

Favourite title: I actually really enjoyed some of my title choices this year, but I absolutely cannot go past I’ll hold your memory in my hands tonight in terms of title. I came up with it, then I giggled, then I thought about how dark the joke was, then I giggled again. Helena held the thank you letter from Tim! Barbara held the plushie of Tim! Dick held Tim’s brain! I’m so awful.

Hardest story to name: bones of a dinosaur, bones of a city I honestly did not know what to call this story, so I ended up essentially opting out of naming it. I think it works, and has joined the storied realms of ‘story titles I’ve invented quotes for’.

Themes I noted in my stories this year: ‘Let’s write about mothers and sisters’ popped out a lot. There’s a lot of death (and discussions of deaths), which unfortunately ties back into the mothers and sisters thing. And a lot of Tim and his relationships with his older siblings: Dick, Barbara, Helena and Cass.

Commentary: well look who fell back into DC fandom and wrote fic. The bunnies attacked and the fandom itself enjoys short stories. On top of that I had, hmm, two ‘sort out the draft I have sitting here and publish it’ stories that went out this year. Becoming Miss Burgeson had been hanging around as an idea more than a story since I finished Invisible Sun in 2021, because not only is Rita Douglas a fascinating character, but also there are SO MANY identity shenanigans over the years in the Burgeson family. Erasmus’ comments on being a Burgeson in particular were the heart of the fic (because everyone forgets Erasmus ALSO is an assumed name). Nobody using the name was born into it and everyone chose to adopt it as a cover. Now Rita’s not nearly the most complex figure here (Miriam’s name situation is even wilder), but due to the complexities of Miriam/Helge’s names, Rita acquired three extra surnames by the transitive nature of being Miriam’s natural daughter. Actually I SHOULD sit down and work out what Rita’s braid name should actually be. I also dusted off Just Skate Figures enough to post the main bits of it, because I was tired of not having the Axel and Minami scene, at least, posted where other people could enjoy it. 

[nonotnolan]

No Not Nolan's Year in Review

This worked out really well for me last year, so-- here’s the stories of 2022, ranked by the number of likes.  And since I can, here’s a link to 2021′s year in review.  I may not be the most prolific author... but limiting myself to one story a month helps me to be consistent, while the low expectations help me to avoid burnout.  This is one of my hobbies, and I’m not planning to try and make it into a career anytime soon.  I’d much rather keep things low stress for my sanity.

12) The Better Body - 116 notes - January 2022 I’m not surprised that this one didn’t do well, given the photos and the overall tone... but content wise, it’s still one of my favorites.  Deconstructing the fantasy can go in multiple directions, and in this case it does not go well for the protagonist.

11) SwapBnS: A Weekend Vacation - 188 notes - March 2022 This one was pretty ambitious, in that I made sure to get permission to use everyone’s likeness for this story.  At the time, I had an idea that it might be fun to turn this into a series, hence the prefix... but that would involve having more people in the community who are willing to post and share photos.  And as someone who doesn’t post my own photo... no judgment.

10) Cooperation - 214 notes - December 2022 The story of a man who is seduced out of his own body... and decides that he’s fine with this outcome, actually.

9) Cuerpo Inc: The Internship - 225 notes - April 2022 I haven’t had the right story idea for this series in several months, but I do really love the concept.  It’s intern season at the premiere bodyswap technology firm, and they do things a bit differently.

8) Fiverr Warlock: Saturdays are for Recovery - 233 notes - October 2022 It’s been awhile since I’ve had a Fiverr Warlock story, and I really enjoy the idea of a world where magic is benign and regulated for sale.  Gus wakes up in his roommate’s body, and the two men just decide to roll with it.  It turns out there’s a reason the swap occurred...

7) All-Staff Meeting - 269 notes - July 2022 I find this one to be pretty adorable.  Two guys who have nothing in common with each other end up swapping bodies, and they decide to live life as each other while they figure out what happened.  Although, it turns out that there’s a third person involved...

6) Cuerpo Inc: Water Cooler Talk - 297 notes - June 2022 It’s the flipside of the Internship story-- a handful of young men find themselves in bodies that are 20+ years older than their original bodies.  They may not think of themselves as sexy, but their coworkers disagree.

5) The Best of Both - 338 notes - February 2022 Here’s the story I wrote for my boyfriend, @mergeman.  Bennett’s been going to the gym for a few weeks, but one of the local muscle studs reminds him a lot of one of his former geeky friends.  But they couldn’t possibly be the same person... could they?

4) Our Deal - 340 notes - November 2022 Two roommates have fallen into a routine that involves swapping bodies to handle chores, and each person is convinced that they have the better end of the deal.

3) Overbearing - 424 notes - May 2022 I don’t really like writing family body swaps, so this is about as close as I might ever get to the concept.  Brandon’s stepfather keeps trying to use bodyswapping as a form of punishment, but it’s not quite working out like he might have hoped.

2) Gym Merchandise - 436 notes - September 2022 It turns out that there is a very good reason everyone that Wyatt talked to recommended Friday’s Gym to him.  The merchandise that they sell on the side is absolutely worth it.

1) Soulmate Swap - 539 notes - August 2022 By far the most successful story I’ve written thus far-- the notes for this piece skyrocketed compared to any other story I’ve written.  It wasn’t my first story to break 500 notes-- it was at 498 when Finals Week broke that barrier-- but given that it needed 14 fewer months... “skyrocketed” might even be an understatement.  Pedro had planned to console his friend Roy after a rough breakup, but instead he finds himself helping out with an odd scheme to find Roy’s soulmate.

Special Mentions-

A Warlock Tale - 83 notes - February 2022 Here’s the story that my boyfriend @mergeman wrote in exchange, which takes place in the Fiverr Warlock universe.  I enjoy it, but I’m quite biased. ;)  He writes merging stories rather than swapping stories, but I feel like most people in our community have a wide net of transformational interests.

Cuerpo Inc: Maintenance - 172 notes - June 2022 The third part of the Internship experience-- the people working behind the scenes to make sure that everything goes smoothly.  Written by @deviantknight25, who is currently on hiatus, but still lurks around the community.  He’s a great writer, and I encourage you explore his archive if you’ve not done so before.

Finals Week - 520 notes - May 2021 Okay, so this one is cheating... but until Soulmate Swap, this was my flagship story.  I can sort of justify putting it here, since it was my first story to hit 500 notes, which happened in September 2022.  Soulmate Swap hit that mark not even a day later, and has since overtaken the “most notes” category.  Anyway, if you’ve not read this one before, I highly recommend it.  In a world where people can easily switch bodies for short periods of time, teachers have it rough. Coach Phillips tries to make it through his day without losing his sanity.

[aseriesofsmallthings]

I finally posted an actual piece of work!

so hey peeps! It's been some time (we all knew it was bound to happen) but I'm back, and this time with gifts!

It's been a long time coming but I finally committed and published a short story! This is an older piece of work I wrote back in 2022, as part of a university assignment I submitted. Since then I've also entered it into a couple comps, though unfortunately it never placed. Regardless, it still remains one of my favourites.

I'd love to hear what you all think (constructive criticism welcome!) and strongly appreciate any and all support in whatever form that may be 🤍 And I'd love to follow those of you also on substack (if any); drop me your names and I'll be sure to do so!

I'll be posting a few other older pieces in the coming days/weeks, before eventually (hopefully) getting round to posting more recent works, but in the meantime, I hope you enjoy, and have a great day/week/month! 🤍

[CW :- violence, bloodshed]

[tadpolesonalgae]

Hey! Can I ask a few questions? Imma ask my every fav author these.

1. How long have you been Writing?

2. Are you planning to make a profession out of this or just doing it for fun?

3. Who or which character do you prefer to write more for?

4. What do you do when you're out of ideas?

5. Lastly, Will plz give an advice for the young writers out that.

Okay first of all, I’m so flattered I’m one of your favourites! Thank you so much 😭🧡💛

‘How long have you been writing?’

So I wrote a single piece of fanfiction back in 2019 for a separate fandom, but other than that, I’d say I started writing as a real hobby in 2022 :)

‘Are you planning to make a profession out of this or just doing it for fun?’

Not out of writing specifically, though I’d love to be able to! I am hoping that it will come in handy with something else I think I might be able to achieve later on though?

‘Who or which character do you prefer to write more for?’

As a general answer, definitely Az 🧡💛

However if I’m feeling sad or in need of comfort it will probably be Feysand 🫣

‘What do you do when you’re out of ideas?’

Usually if I’m out of my own ideas I’ll switch to completing requests? However if I’ve lost the urge to actually write, then I’ll put on some music and see what happens, or watch a horror game (resi 7 has become my comfort series), read a book, take a shower, eat a meal, laze in bed if it’s the evening, just general things I know improve my mood to get me back on my feet I think :)

Though if it’s the morning of a weekend or something and I’m trying to get tumblr stuff done but it’s not working, I’ll usually try and find non-tumblr related tasks to do just help me feel like I’ve gotten something done 🧡💛

‘Lastly, Will plz give an advice for the young writers out that.’

Gosh, okay, I think it really depends on what sort of person you are for this? Naturally different things will work for different people so maybe consider what you want to write? In the sphere of fanfiction do you think you’ll be writing only for one fandom or a few? Do shorter pieces like drabbles and headcanons, or longer pieces like one-shots and series suit you? (Obviously you can write a mixture, I think it can be useful to have variety so people can read what suits them?)

This might be more on the boring side, but being aware of what suits you in terms of how much you can write? Fanfiction can take up a lot of your personal time, so if you ever start to feel like it’s getting too much you can always take a break, or decide to shift posting days around—this isn’t something that has to be permanent. Heck you don’t even have to have a schedule for uploads if that’s not your style which is the fun part of having this as a hobby!

Also, as dull as it might be, trying to remember to proofread things 🫠 I know I still sometimes reread my older fics (sometimes also newer ones) and end up spotting simple mistakes that just take away from the immersion of a fic, so as monotonous as it is, I’d really suggest trying to proofread, or if you know grammar isn’t your strong suit, just brushing up on that, too! I don’t think it’s the end of the world, or that it will push people away, but I do think it’s something that’s important to writing :)

[fountainpenguin]

Hello! This isn't trying to pressure you or anything, I'm just genuinely curious and wanted to know about your plans for Mario content (since I know you've wanted to do that for a while). Any fun worldbuilding you'd like to share? :)

Thanks for the Ask!

Man, I wrote Mario world stuff ages ago that I completely forgot about... I had a 100 Prompts series and I think I got into the 30s before it stopped. I had tons of worldbuilding for Cackletta and Fawful specifically since they were my favorites :)

I do still keep my [current] Mario drafts around, but unfortunately I'm not sure when I'll post them... I'm never satisfied. I like the canon worldbuilding the way it is and it Does Not Translate very well into my writing style. I've tried for years, but it just... doesn't.

My Mario stuff is "okay," but it just feels very "meh" to me. I think I'll get there someday if I'm willing to work on it, but I'm not able to do that right now. I HAVE actually thought about it and I might post the occasional one-shot, but I'm not sure yet. My worldbuilding is still all over the place and it's very messy and I'm not in love with it.

---

One of my stories is called "Political Machines" and it's about how the name "Mario Kart" came to be; it's Peach POV and delves into the culture of racing Yoshis back before karts came around. I like the idea of it a lot, but it's extremely info-dumpy and I've been struggling with it for years. I think I need to write something else first, but I haven't figured out what. Here's a scene from that:

I also love how savage Peach is skdflj:

---

I also have two Bowser stories (a one-shot called "1-Down" which is Kamek POV and covers the deaths of Bowser's parents, which I LOVE but can't make it hit right) and a very loose draft for a story called Carapace Rex which is a Bowser backstory 'fic. Here's a good scene from the former:

I do miss this 'fic... I really like how extreme Bowser is despite how badly bullied he is by his abusive mom; he's vicious to her and I love that.

tbh it's actually really nice and maybe I'm overthinking it. I'd love to finish it; I just can't get the emotions right.

That said, I might take another whack at it soon and post when I'm done fiddling since I've already seen how I'll fiddle with it for years if I don't commit to a date /shrug. It's definitely one of the stories that ever was... It's just not hitting the emotions I need it to.

---

I LOVE the opening lines to Carapace Rex (not sharing for major "1-Down" spoiler reasons), but I probably won't write the latter since it's been almost 6 years since I started it back in 2018. Getting older, hoping to publish original work, and starting a new long 'fic wouldn't be a good idea (Dog's Life draft started in early 2022 and Factor in 2018; I'm just wrapping up existing projects for now, but Carapace was always super vague so I don't really want to get into it). I might turn it into a one-shot though since I really love the voice in it.

-> The concept behind Carapace was that Koopas were predators of Toads... I actually reskinned the intro for Carapace into a piece of original content I used in my advanced creative writing class in college, then reskinned it again as the backstory for my OC Courtney the snow leopard, then reskinned it again to be the original project I took to a writer's conference this year...

I'm dying to do something original with predators and prey, but I've had a lot of talks with agents and editors and professional authors and we agreed it's not the right time for this content. To make a long story short, I'd either have to strip the fantasy politics out and de-age the characters so it's "animal people middle grade" or I'd have to age up the characters and push the adult angle and I... I don't know how I feel about my public author persona being "adult furry content"...... that's not what I want; I just want wolf kids hunting in the woods for their coming of age and growing up in this post-war world of fantasy politics and ceremonies... sob. The publishing world has categories though and you have to play by the rules.

Maybe someday... but I have a weird relationship with Carapace because of that, because I'm in LOVE with the scenes from it but I'd hate to use them in Mario fanfic when I'd like to use them in original work. Tsk-tsk. Maybe someday once I've already gotten my foot in the door. I'm keeping this project on the backburner as something I might self-publish but I've talked to a lot of people and I'd rather get something published traditionally and try to build my author platform before I invest, because self-pub is... expensive.

Honestly right now Dog's Life is giving me my "we're way too young to be carrying the weight of this many interspecies politics on our shoulders" fix, so at least I have that <3

---

I also have an 8-chapter 'fic called "Out of You" which is about Kamek trying to raise the Koopalings (and Junior). I'll probably scrap most of that and rehash it as something else; I don't think there's much worth saving...? I'll have to think about it.

But here's my favorite WIP scene from it, ft. Ludwig and Peach:

:)

Potential's good, fun is good... Just need to find the right kind of worldbuilding that satisfies me. I'd originally hoped to post Mario stuff before the movie came out in April, but I just never got around to it. Maybe someday? It just doesn't feel right, though, and I can't invest my energy in something I'm not in love with.

---

That's all I have to say right now; I don't want to say too much about my worldbuilding since it's still super messy. I have ideas about what would be "cool" or "interesting" but I just... don't love those ideas enough to make them part of "my take" on the world. There is a fine line between "Riddle's usual magical realism writing style" and "At this point it's an AU." I think I need to cull back the crazy ideas and stick closer to canon.

Is that "boring" and "uncreative"? Eh, I think that's just where my passion lies; I write fanfics because I love the media, and if I didn't love it, I wouldn't be writing fanfics. When I write, I want to continue writing the worldbuilding that I love, which means basing it closely on the media. I guess I'll always be canon compliant at heart even in a fandom where I'm okay with writing AUs, ha ha.

Maybe I'll dig up some of my really old one-shots from that 100 prompts project, clean them up a little, and post some of them. I know there were some Baby Bowser and Doopliss pieces in there. Might be a nice icebreaker.

[awritingcaitlin]

10 First Lines

@elbritch-kit tagged me for this a month ago! 👋🏻 Sorrynotsorry I'm late!

Anyway, I've done a couple of these before, but this one's rules is very specifically:

rules: share the first lines of the last ten things you’ve written

So, uh, this should be interesting because fun fact about me, I rewrite the same stuff over and over again.

🔥TBW: Mama Cass normally prided herself on her composure.

🥃LGO: In all honesty, Rinnie was too drunk to remember who hit the bed first.

👩‍🦰RA: “Where are we?” Taryn asked.

🎻ROTG: A Temple of Adelus wasn’t her favorite place for a gig, but considering Em was avoiding Seamus Finn establishments, she’d take what she could get.

💥SB: The wind on Berthingtonn’s eastern docks always seemed to blow far more strongly than it did on the west side.

♟TGG: “Eileen,” Aravae said, trying to put enough warning into her tone that Eileen would get the message, but not so much warning that Finley would pick up on it.

💨WH: “Wind’s howling,” Teagan mutters in her best Geralt impression.

❄CTQ: Two women walked along the busy evening streets of Himmelmauer, their course pointed towards the castle.

🍲AEB: First there is chaos, and then there is cold.

💎TWS: Rinnie is on a beach, but it's not a beach she recognizes. The magic feels different. 

Okay, that actually wasn't too hard to track down all things considered. I feel like elaborating with more stats, so I'll do that under the cut.

But first, I'll tag: @sentfromwolves, @tananaphone, @legiomiam, @mjjune, and @muddshadow (no pressure, anyone!)

The Brewing War: aka Book 1, it's up at the top of the list (most recent) because it's been in steady revisions of it since April. That first line? Totally new.

Lights Go Out: is a character study of Rinnie, Aravae, and Ciara and I was writing it separately from TBW because that content does not actually belong on the pages of TBW, but it's up there because I wrote it in June.

Redheads Abound: is a AU fanfiction essentially combining my characters with characters from 3 others writeblrs on here. Wrote that back in April.

Relic of the Gods: aka ViolinHeist, happens in the same universe as TBW but is not a prequel. It got a few revisions in April, but after rewriting the first three chapters of Draft 3, I set it down to let other stuff percolate in the back of my head.

Siege of Berthingtonn: aka Book 2 got some edits back in March, though that first line is older.

The Great Game: aka Book 4 where I've done bits and pieces of that so that's the first line I've written but it's definitely not Chapter 1 or a prologue even. That was back in March.

Wind's Howling: is a flashfic I wrote back in February. Experimenting with present tense.

Cure for the Queen: aka Book 3. It got finished back in March of 2022. April-August was ROTG Draft 1, August-October was then SB Draft 8, November-February was ROTG again which explains the break and reemphasizes that I just write the same things over and over again.

Soup 2 Another Electric Boogaloo: was something I was working on back in October of 2021 (in between working on CTQ). It was fanfiction of fanfiction and I wrote it primarily while still working at GameStop because I could just write it on my phone.

Team W Shenanigans: was also something I was working on back in the Fall of 2021, same time as AEB. It was fanfiction that Rinnie was also involved in.

Hilariously, Rinnie never seems to get first lines unless it's a character study, or fanfiction. I should probably change that. But also, Rinnie's not really a candidate for the prologues of the main series of books so there's also that.

Okay I'm done rambling now. Have a cookie if you read this far 🍪

[pidge-poetry]

Foals welcome bassist Walter Gervers back to the band

"Get ready, the boys are back in business"

By Andrew Trendell | 2nd May 2023 | NME

Foals have announced that former bassist Walter Gervers has re-joined the band.

The band, who are currently gearing up for a run of intimate UK out-store shows before hitting the road to support Paramore in South America and then later return to headline Reading & Leeds, had previously teased to NME that they’d have a “surprise” for fans about who’d be playing with them at the upcoming gigs.

Now, they’ve revealed that Gervers is back in the line-up, following his departure from the group in 2017.

“After six years in the alpine wilderness guess who’s back in the band?,” wrote frontman Yannis Philippakis in an Instagram post of his fellow Foals members in the pub with Gervers. “Walter is back and better than ever. Rejoining for all the coming shows and into the future. Get ready, the boys are back in business.”

The band then went on to share footage of the reunited line-up back in rehearsals.

Gervers previously left the group in order to “pursue a new life”. The band remained a four-piece before becoming a trio when keyboardist Edwin Congreave left in 2021 to focus on his studies and environmental work. Following Gervers’ exit, live bass duties have been carried out by Everything Everything’s Jeremy Pritchard and Jagwar Ma’s Jack Freeman.

Speaking to NME in 2019 ahead of the release of ‘Everything Not Saved Will Be Lost Part One’ – their first record without Gervers – Philippakis spoke of how the band felt without him as “the counsellor” of Foals.

“Walter was probably the nicest member of Foals, so without him, you’re left with four sharp edges in a room,” said Yannis. “Those sharp edges have to find a way to get on quite quickly or the whole thing turns into an unbearable nightmare.”

Drummer Jack Bevan continued: “If you were to look at it as a family, and I’ve seen about 100 times more of these guys than I have my actual family over the last 10 years, then Walter was kind of like the dad or much older brother who kept us from fighting with each other. A lot of the time, he was the one who would organise us to do nice and wholesome activities.”

Last month saw Foals release the dub remix of their acclaimed 2022 album ‘Life Is Yours’ by Speedy Wunderground label boss and super-producer Carey (Wet Leg, Slowthai, Fontaines D.C.) as part of 2023’s Record Store Day releases.

Philippakis told NME about how the “sweaty and unclean” remix album “goes into space, via Streatham”, as well as their hopes and plans for touring with Paramore and headlining Reading & Leeds for a second time.

Foals embark on a short run of intimate UK dates this month before Reading & Leeds in August. Visit here for tickets and more information.

[bbrandy2002]

I posted 117 times in 2022

10 posts created (9%)

107 posts reblogged (91%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@ao719

@burnsoslow

@charlotteg234

@kingliam2019

@dcbbw

I tagged 23 of my posts in 2022

#queued - 9 posts

#the royal romance - 5 posts

#king liam - 5 posts

#liam x mc - 5 posts

#trr - 5 posts

#liam x riley - 5 posts

#bbrandy2002 - 3 posts

#fools rush in - 3 posts

#long post - 2 posts

#choices - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 35 characters

#who says we dont work in the summer

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Happy Sunday @charlotteg234

🥵 Enjoy!

13 notes - Posted April 10, 2022

#4

An Apology

Several months ago I accused someone of sending me a hate anon. I've thought about that ordeal from time to time, but even more so recently.

Being in a place in my life where Im not so stressed out anymore or disillusioned by every little thing, Im able to make rational thoughts and think things through a little clearer. Looking back at old messages with someone else, I have a pretty solid feeling I know who actually did send them and thankfully they're not around here any longer.

With that said, when Im wrong, I say Im wrong. And in that instance ... I was wrong. Even if I never said her name publicly, I would like to apologize to @queenrileyrose for my accusations and the hurt you experienced following that. I've already done so privately and the nature of that conversation will remain so.

I can't undo what happened, I can only try to make it right.

Here's to 2022 being about positivity and kindness. Again, my humblest apologies to QRR.

13 notes - Posted January 3, 2022

#3

Happy Birthday to ...me lol

I have to take a moment here to show off these two amazing commissions my bestie @burnsoslow and my great friend @ao719 had done for my birthday.

The first piece by Burns is from her ORDIV Ch 33 when Liam proposed to Riley in the gazebo at Valtoria where the had their first day 🥺🥺🥺

The second one is from Anitah, who used a scene from the fic Burns wrote for my birthday last year Heaven, Hell or Houston when Liam and Riley had met at the bar and when on this whirlwind date, kissing at every stop light 😍

Two of my favorite scenes captured so perfectly and it makes my heart swell so big.

Thank you both so much for these precious works that I will cherish and most likely stare at everyday for weeks to come. I love you both with all my heart and thank you for making another year of getting older a lot more bearable and for your friendship that I value so hard!

59 notes - Posted May 19, 2022

#2

Fools Rush In

Chapter 21

Book: TRR

Pairing: Liam x Riley

Series Premise: With two weeks before he is set to marry Madeleine, the guys throw Liam an impromptu bachelor party that results in him (and Drake) leaving Vegas with more than he bargained for.

Word count: 3900 -ish

Warning: Language

Soooo ... hey lol It's been a hot minute since I've written or posted anything (or just been around in general). Anyway, I came back to several messages asking about this chapter. I actually had 90% of it written back in October and just thought it was pure shit and gave up on it ... actually, I gave up on writing altogether. Having some time this week, I opened up the doc, rewrote some things, deleted out some stuff and finally managed to finish it. It's still not even close to what I wanted it to be, as it's the end of this arc, but I've decided to just have fun writing again. If there's anything Ive learned during my time away it's that none of us will ever write the perfect story, or use the perfect words, or have the most compelling characters and it's okay; I think I finally have accepted that. Just have fun doing it!

This concludes my TedTalk

---------------------------

“Doctor ... Wolfschitz?” a bewildered Alyssa questioned.

“That’s no damn doctor!” Drake bore his eyes into the former prince, who was already howling with laughter, dodging a pillow that whirled in his direction from Drake. “What the actual fuck is your problem, Leo?”

Leo clutched his side, trying to catch his breath. “The look on your face, man … I can't. I really had you going there for a minute didn’t I, Walker? Afraid you were about to lose that new pee-pee, huh?” He continued to laugh riotously at Drake’s expense before his gaze hastily shifted its attention toward Alyssa. “Why’d you blow my cover, thong girl?”

“Thong girl? Alyssa muttered, absentmindedly crossing her legs while attempting to hide the fact her face was quickly glowing bright pink. How’d he know I was wearing one?

“Why are you here, Leo?” Drake repeated as Leo casually strolled up to his bed and scooped up a chocolate pudding cup from Drake’s food tray. “And how in the sam hell did you even know I was in the hospital?

“Came with Liam,” he replied nonchalantly as he plopped his ass down on the end of the bed and peeled off the top of his pudding cup, licking the plastic wrap clean. “He’s down the hall with Riley right now. Seems my little brother is a prized stud after all … got that Rys sperm in him, ya know? Knocked her up real good yo. Hafta say … I’m impressed.”

“Knocked her up?” Alyssa gasped before stepping closer to him. “Hold up; Riley’s pregnant?”

Leo nodded and shoveled a giant heap of pudding into his mouth. “Yeah. I’m going to be an uncle again --” he eyed Drake’s plate contemplatively, “ -- You gonna eat the rest of that meatloaf, man?” Drake scowled and pushed his tray toward the hungry Prince.

Alyssa quickly put all the clues together. “So that’s why Riley was so sick earlier? She didn’t have a concussion, --” she smiled endearingly, “ -- she just had morning sickness. ... Well, is she okay? Is the baby okay? The fall didn’t hurt them, did it?”

Leo, concentrating on finishing the rest of that meatloaf, languidly shrugged. “I dunno.”

“Well, did they at least give her something safe for her back pain yet?” Alyssa probed further.

Leo shoved another large bite of meatloaf and again answered. “I dunno.”

“Oh my God! Do you know anything?” A frustrated Alyssa finally asked.

With a mouthful of food, Leo tilted his head back in deep thought and replied the best he could, “I know this meatloaf is fucking BOMB, dude. Not too shabby for hospital grub.” He swallowed heartily. “The pudding on the other hand … absolute shit.” He tapped the edge of the plastic container with his plastic spoon as he spoke to it, “Snack-Pak, you disappoint me.”

Desperate for an answer, Alyssa reached out and grasped Leo’s shirt, jerking him closer. “Fuck the snack-pak, Wolfshitz; what about Riley?”

“Riley? Oh, she never disappoints me …” Leo sideways glanced with a frown. “Liam on the other hand ...”

Stunned by this strange man’s erratic and seemingly unhinged behavior, Alyssa shot a wide-eyed glare at Drake, who just shook his head slowly. “Don’t try to make sense of him, Alyssa. Just don’t. You’ll never be able to figure him out.”

Needing to be reassured, Alyssa pulled a cell phone from her back pocket and started furiously shooting off a text to Riley. While her back was turned to the men, Drake couldn’t help but notice the way her ass hugged perfectly in those skinny jeans and soon realized his new body part had showed up in tandem with his sudden arousal. With Leo’s interest remaining focused on the damn meatloaf for the time being, Drake eased a hand under the white sheet covering him and felt around the area below his waist; his breath hitched with relief at the rock-solid bulge that had erupted. Feeling a little giddy that everything was working as it should, the euphoria soon subsided when he caught a glimpse of Leo’s saucy gaze on Alyssa.

Overcome with a strong sense of jealousy over the girl he’d just caught sneaking a peek at his naked self less than five minutes ago, Drake quietly urged through gritted teeth, “Stop looking at her like that, Leo! She’s not some conquest you can just sack for your sick playboy pleasures.”

“Says the guy who caught panty crickets from a $2 hooker and needed a dick transplant.” Leo retorted with a smirk. “Besides, father always said, ‘I see it, I like it, I want it, I got it.” He wagged his tongue in lust. “And I see that.” He motioned to Alyssa’s backside.

See the full post

73 notes - Posted April 7, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

First Comes Love

Chapter One

Book: The Royal Romance -Complete AU

Pairing:Liam x Riley/Liam x Madeleine (I promise Maddie’s nice here)

A/N: This will most likely be a mini-series; no more than 5 or 6 chapters.This is loosely based on a movie you might recognize but I’ve tried to make it my own. 

Series Premise: It's destiny when two people from different worlds meet. Riley is an up-and-coming wedding planner who finds herself tasked with planning the biggest wedding of her career, only to find out the man she fell for after a brief encounter in NYC is the groom ... and a king.

Trigger Warnings: There is a mention of suicidal ideation, but it’s not part of the plot. Some minor language.

Thank you @burnsoslow for pre-reading. All grammar errors are my own.

It’s been so long since I’ve started a new fic, I don’t even know if I have a taglist that isn’t filled with people who have left or hate me now; I guess I’m starting all over again. If you want tagged, let me know.

New York City

Liam zoned out 2.1 seconds after stepping inside a trendy office on the upper floors of a high-rise building in downtown Manhattan. The pale pink shades of the walls, decorative cushions, window scarfing, and gloss on the lips of his future bride, screamed out bottles of Pepto to the new King -- if only he had some to help with the unease in the pit of stomach.

That morning, a meeting with a highly renowned woman was on the agenda, discussing and presenting potential options for his upcoming nuptials, just weeks away. Even under normal circumstances, a wedding wasn’t exactly something that excited Liam. Not that he was never thrilled for the couple and wished them all the happiness in the world, it just held little importance in his day-to-day life. Weddings served as yet another reminder of what he wanted -- and what he couldn't have. 

It was amusing to Liam how he could hold so much power, yet wielded none of it for himself.

This wasn’t how it was supposed to be.

The owner of this particular firm, Jill Gordon, had built quite the reputation as the elite among modern event design, planning, and production companies, with a specialty in weddings. The clientele included a long list of celebrities, politicians, affluent Manhattan debutantes, and occasionally acquired foreign business. The latter is how Madeleine first heard of The Jill Gordon Company while attending the French Ambassador's ceremony several months ago as a representative for Cordonia. With the last stop of their engagement tour in New York City, the future queen was eager to add a visit to her appointment book before they returned home and began the laborious task of planning the biggest wedding in Cordonian history.

Although the palace had more than their fair share of staff with experience hosting monumental events, such as balls, state dinners, and various celebrations, there hadn’t been a royal wedding there in over 20 years. Madeleine thought someone with experience handling grand-scale weddings with a sophisticated flair, who could share their vision and expertise with the staff and take charge of the arrangements, would guarantee everything went off without a hitch. 

The King simply went along to get along.

Madeleine and Liam sat across from Jill at her glass-top desk, where a single, lone laptop sat catty-corner on top. While the owner enthused and embellished her business to an attentive Madeleine, Liam focused on the assemblage of black-and-white portraits meticulously placed in neat rows along the wall behind the woman’s desk. It was no doubt a deliberate focal point to showcase the clients her agency had done work for in the past. Maybe others who had previously sat in the same chair he sat in at that moment were charmed with the love and joy captured in each of those images; the twinge in Liam’s heart wasn’t buying into it. 

After a lengthy social season and with a lot of pressure from his father and the council, he’d chosen Madeleine to become his queen. At first, he couldn’t stand her -- Hell, maybe he never could. She was pretentious, overbearing, cunning, and frequently insensitive. But somewhere between his coronation and the beginning of the tour, she changed almost as if overnight. At that first stop in Fydelia, he noticed a more relaxed, more thoughtful, and just easier to be around Madeleine. It’s possible she’d finally gotten the coveted prize she had obsessed over long before being dumped after Leo abdicated and could put aside some of that anxiety that brought out the worst in her. But to Liam, it seemed to be a little something more: either the Countess had come to her senses about her standoffish behavior, or maybe it was this new business venture Hana and Rashad talked her into, causing a distraction for the Countess. 

Whatever it was, was a welcome change. Liam had grown to respect her, find some common ground, and put away some of that overwhelming dread about spending the rest of his life with her. And while it was no secret between the two that there wasn’t more than friendly affection, duty made no exceptions when it came to their obligation. 

For both of them, that's precisely what this was. Now it was time to make the best of it and move forward.

Jill sat forward in her swivel chair with a warm smile. Her hands splayed on the glass top as she spoke in a refined tone. “I have the perfect person in mind to handle such an important wedding, as yours… that is if you choose to go with us.” Jill quickly added, not wanting to scare them off with too much pressure, too soon. She knew adding a royal wedding to her list would attract mass attention in the press and social circles for her business, which meant huge profits.

“Really?” Madeleine crowed, glancing over at Liam, who promptly brandished an over-enthused smile before she turned her attention back to Jill. “Tell us more about her.”

“Elaine has over twenty-three years of experience and is the best in this business, and has served most of our biggest named clients. She recently planned the President’s granddaughter’s wedding.” Jill boasted.

“I heard of that one …” Madeleine swooned before adding, “glamorous, yet sophisticated and classy, which is exactly what we’re looking for. Would she have time to meet with us now?”

Jill frowned. “I apologize, but she’s actually booked for the day, preparing for another wedding this evening. A busy lady that one is. Let me see what her calendar looks like.” She moved the mouse beside her laptop around and clicked a few times, pausing momentarily to scan the screen. “She’s free in the morning if you’re able to return then.”

Liam, who had been studying the glass wall that separated Jill’s office from the reception area and wondering why in the hell anyone would want to be watched while they worked, finally contributed to the discussion for the first time since walking in. “We’re actually leaving first thing in the morning.”

“Not until 9:30,” Madeleine hastily clarified. She continued cheerfully, “Tonight marks the official end of our engagement tour, and we’re wrapping up with a celebration in Midtown. We fly out tomorrow.”

“That's wonderful!" Jill replied. "Perhaps the two of you can stop in before your flight in the morning and meet Elaine personally and see if we can work out an agreement. I don’t think you’ll regret it,” she trilled, able to conceal the shameless desperation behind her words like a true professional. 

Well schooled in body language and tone, Liam smirked to himself, able to hear it anyway.

See the full post

119 notes - Posted January 2, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[tracy-warcross]

Short oc lore list if anyone cares:

Treace Truman: ace and lesbian, 6’10 and born in 1996, divorced a childhood friend cuz she never had feelings for him (oop), singer/songwriter; professor, and author Libra

Stephanie Truman: Treace’s sister, 1992 and has a son named Jake (born 2022) Taurus

Jake _____: born 2022 Virgo, Stephanie’s son Treace’s nephew (and he doesn’t have a last name cuz I haven’t named his dad yet my mind is a mess)

(Fun fact his name is the same as Treace’s ex husband and no they did not name him Jake after Jake Harrison it was after Stephanie’s husband’s family member or something)

Emily Truman: Treace’s second elder sister, 1994 virgo

Betty S______-Truman: Treace’s younger half sister, 1998; childhood bsf with Ania; shared a dad with Treace but goes under mothers last name. On off relationship with Treace’s ex Jake (I’m saying this as everyone is related in someway)

Ania ________(I haven’t had a last name for her at all ifk): Treace’s future wife, 1998, 183cm; they don’t date till 2031 but oh well

Takanori Miyazaki: based on a lost childhood friend, my bsf, Gemini

April Miyazaki: Takanoris older sister, Aries 1996

Alexis C. Truman (formerly Harrison): Treace’s youngest daughter born 2014 Gemini a ficking genius btw (she’s a senior in HS as of 2022-23)

Tara F. Truman (formerly Harrison as well): Treace’s eldest, Zowie’s twin sister, older by 10 minutes, born 2013, Libra, senior in hs 22-23 year

Zowie A. Truman (former: Harrison): Treace’s second, Tara’s twin, Libra 2013 senior in HS

Tracy: Imaginary form, idealized version of myself essentially, bisexual nonbinary piece of shit who goes by any pronouns lol, Aries

Idk why I wrote this probs to tell y’all stuff if y’all are kinda confused for some reason

I made the chats primarily for me to document and enjoy (no I’m not making a new acc for this I’m too fucking lazy sorry)

I am also aware that some stuff don’t make sense here (aka why is Alexis a Gemini from 2014 and the twins libras from 2013) but my mind is fixed to this rate and it makes sense to me

Treace is based off someone I’ve met irl, so is takanori. Everyone else is pure fiction and idk more of their ( Treace and tak) lives of true forms (idk their real inspirations anymore, Treace’s sisters are fictional her kids are fictional April is fiction. Also idk what their actual birthdays are I just made them up as I liked )

For any more information please research maladaptive daydreaming and paracosms

They are not ocs they are imaginary friends who’ve been around for ages I just say oc so I don’t sound crazy. This is a build up of years of my imagination and can’t easily be altered and if you read this far I appreciate you for putting up with my nonsense

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk

[melodiiesxfmadness]

the worst day since yesterday. ( 2022 writing piece. )

Removing the leather bound journal from her mini backpack, she unraveled the ties from around it and swore under her breath as the felt tip pen unceremoniously fell out and to the floor.

— 𝓝𝓸𝓿𝓮𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 28𝓽𝓱, 2022.

So … it's been a while since I last wrote anything in you. Sorry about that I guess? But the it's been a few months since I've actually needed to. That was the plan though …. right? To journal only to help clear my mind for the worst days. … And today was definitely one of the worst that I've had to deal with in a loooooong time. Lourdes was seated in her car in the parking lot of Carolina Bail Bonding Inc. Everybody had gone home for the day and she … was taking a little longer to help clear her mind for the drive home. Sniffling softly, she brought a hand up to wipe away the tears from her eyes. Staring down at the edge of that index finger, noticing that it had little black smears on them, not caring that her mascara was smudged now. The mechanical pencil moved carefully against the paper once more.

Here's the story. Someone's beloved abuela showed up this afternoon just after lunch … because the owner got a phone call from her grandson's defense attorney. The man didn't have the time or the energy to find a translator or try to tell her what was going on. Her grandson has been gone for two months, out on bail for his reckless driving while drunk that killed three kids. … He received a mystery call from some country with no extradition to the states, telling him the kid isn't coming back. This older woman reminds me of my own abuela, who lived with me and my family while growing up. She spoke nothing but Spanish, so I had the misfortune of having to sit her down and translate the best I could … … … — Eso se debe a que su nieto no solo no compareció ante el tribunal sin una buena razón, sino que se saltó la fianza y huyó del país ... el tribunal la mantenía en casa. { That because her grandson not only failed to appear in court without a good reason, jumping his bail and fled the country ... the court was keeping her home. } A home she worked likely most of her life to keep, that she raised her family and their families in. Her hands were shaking as she held the journal, dropping it into the passenger's seat just as two drops fell into the page before she did. Tears mixed with mascara stained the page, she couldn’t finish it. She was too exhausted - too mentally and emotionally exhausted from the turmoil of today. Placing both hands on the wheel, she dropped her head down between her arms as a cry of anguish tore from her throat now.

After some time had passed, Lourdes finally started the engine once she had cried as much as possible. Having wrapped up the journal again, placing it and the pencil inside the mini backpack once more and used a make-up wipe to clear away what remained of her mascara. Once home, she let the dogs run around outside while putting their food together. All she did was shower and put on her most comfortable pajamas, no energy to even eat herself.

The journal entry would remain incomplete for now, it weighed too heavy on her heart. Turning on the white noise machine to try and help her fall asleep.

[talenlee]

January Wrapup, 2023!

January Wrapup, 2023!

It’s not the end of the month just yet. I’m looking down the barrel of the end of the month, and seeing what’s coming in the last week or so, and phew. I better write this month’s wrapup now because at some point I’m going to be helping someone move house and that’s not fun at the best of times.

Let’s check out first of all, what I wrote this month about games in the Game Pile:

Keep The Heroes Out: This was a really fun cooperative board game that I enjoyed playing a lot. What’s more, playing it, I kept thinking about the way that the game used its particular structure of iconography and a rulebook to displace the game systems away from a lot of reading. It’s beautiful, it’s indulgent, there’s not a lot of time waste in the box on something that isn’t adding something cool to the game.

Speedrunning the Swindle: I wanted to make something that suited the theme of GDQ that was running at the time, and I decided to make a video about finally getting off my butt and making a speedrun archive page for The Swindle. As of right now? I’m still the world leader at The Swindle which means, odds are good, you can probably get the record off me.

Crystal Caves: There’s always space for something small and weird from gaming’s history, and it seems that if you ask me about the old games from the Apogee shareware catalogue, you’ll find me eventually bringing it back to assumptions about the world and what working class people look like. What’s acceptable? What’s normal? Turns out: working for huge piles of money and still always needing to do more work!

A 2023 Channel Trailer: With the dissolution of twitter’s importance in my life, I decided I wanted to redo my channel trailer. This meant using most of the existing audio, but redoing it to both refine it down to exactly 2 minutes long, and using it to present my new animated avatar. I got to do a lot of improvement from this video, like how to make it lip-sync to audio without needing to prop a microphone into my headphones!

And this month’s posting in the Story Pile:

Goncharov: I wrote an explainer on the giant consensual play experience of funning around with the gimmick fake movie, Goncharov from November 2022, and the strangely condescending way everyone who wasn’t enjoying it thought it should have been done.

The Rendezvous: There are a lot of pieces of media that relate to speedrunning of sorts, you know, almost anything built about a race, documentaries about speedrunning, all that good stuff. But I love finding ways to connect older things to current things, and this is one of my dad’s favourite movies that happens to be an IRL speedrun that just happens to have also been really illegal.

Megatokyo: This article is over four thousand words long. Read aloud, it’s over forty minutes. Do you want me to make a video version of this?

Children of Time: I loved this book about cat-sized spider culture! I don’t talk much about books I read (because a lot of the books I read are more academic than fictional) but this was a really cracking one that I read last year and actually kept putting off because I wanted to write about it when it would be fun to do so.

My Hero Academia, Season 1: Oh hey, you know those huge sprawling TV series that are hard to examine as a single, big chunk? I’ve decided to try breaking them up into separate articles so I can examine them in terms of the kinds of time commitment they ask of you!

This is a month for maintenance. I’m trying this year to do more with each post; fewer posts that are really brief and don’t feature a solid amount of words and images. Generally, a thousand words, or five minutes of audio, or an image made for the post (as is the exchange rate for words, I understand). I’m trying to make it so I don’t pad things out much, and use each potential space to say some stuff to do so – like the ‘welcome to 2023 post‘ this year was also a consideration of what it means to blog for ten years and why I started.

There are articles I hold off on writing until I can dedicate time to being sure I’m happy with them, comfortable with how they read and I can run them past people, spoken aloud — and for me, this month, the example is the article about ‘Losing’ Bridget. This grew out of considering the challenges of two different axes I know can feel really rough: Being a wrong kind of fan and being a guy in a space where it feels like people are celebrating something you didn’t think was hurting anyone. I thought this was a worthy topic to think about and talk about, and to try and serve as a guy, as a positive example to other guys about how to relate to this challenging space without hurting other people out of defiance or thoughtlessness.

If you like me talking about my D&D setting, and why I made the choices I did, I wound up telling the story of the founding of a goblin city and how it put the King’s Highway through the nation of Dal Raeda. This year I’m doing a big project with my Magic: The Gathering custom cards, creating a whole set with flavour and worldbuilding. It’s called the Usurper’s Palace and I wrote about it in a little more detail, and you can follow it now throughout the year. I wrote a bit about Josh Lyman (first time being here), the character from the West Wing, and one of the many instances in which he was a shitty dude who sucks. It’s pretty important since Josh Lyman is a fictional character who was able to will himself into an embarrassing real existence. Finally, during GDQ I wrote about The Grasshopper, a book I like a lot because I find its definition of games and how we play them interesting, and how that book relates to the idea of a speedrun.

This month’s shirt is a simple text-on-field kind of design about what it’s like to exist in my head at the right time and place, where the phrase I’m fine, and you? is something resting atop and keeping you safe from an extremely extensive kind of haranguing that wants to talk about specific, intriguing media events that excite and frustrate me. You can get it in white text and black text!

This month featured a return to PhD meetings, my niblings going on an international trip, one of my best friends being away from home, GDQ, Fox getting a vaccine booster and reacting to it poorly in the pharmacy, the build-up for Cancon, then the actual running of Cancon, Australia day, and a housemove. This is a month where two absolute bastard Catholics dropped dead, I fucked up pretty badly and then I spent weeks trying to unfuck the upfuck.

I am writing this a week out and I feel good about what I’m trying to do, but I’m also just feeling that constant low-key jostling watery stomach feeling. I find myself talking to the air around me like here’s why I made the mistake I did, which isn’t helpful and doesn’t do anything beyond get me dwelling on the mistake again, and that makes me feel stupid, and that’s not a good place. I try to respond to this feeling when I notice myself doing it by just getting to work on the thing I fucked up and trying to address it.

Right now I am looking at it in another tab and I want to make sure I don’t fuck it up while trying to unfuck it.

Also, funny thing? I was really interested in working on board games while I was at Cancon, but I didn’t have the time. Everything was way too bloody busy for me to sit down and spend time talking with people about game designs! And that’s normally a time when I have heaps of time to look at games, look at game designs and things in the library and ask myself ‘how would I approach that? How would I implement that?’

No chance.

I’m shocked at how busy this month has been but god damnit I am going to get this done.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

#Diary