#I WANT TO EAT HIM AND PUT HIM IN MY POCKET
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callmeagardengnome · 3 days ago
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✗ blood in the clouds ✗ | KIM HONGJOONG
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pairings ✃ mafia leader! hongjoong x flight attendant! fem! reader
genre ✃ mafia au, non-idol au, SLOW BURNN
synopsis ✃
it’s finally your last day as a flight attendant. you wanted nothing more than to laze on your couch and watch netflix - just to find out that one of your passengers blew out the brains of your pilot with a gun.
in which hongjoong hijacks a plane that his rival’s daughter is on.
w.c ✃ 10.5k (yes im a yapper im sorry)
c.w ✃ dark themes, vivid descriptions of gore, guns and knives, kiss scene but no smut, use of the nickname ‘brat’, ‘pretty’ and ONE TIME - ‘princess’, your dad’s a dick oops, vulgar language, reader is smart
author’s note: this is the first oneshot of my mafia series! yes it is long but i promise you that it does eat and that you’ll enjoy it. remember to reblog and comment if you enjoyed, any and all feedback helps!
not proofread!
masterlist
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white clouds drifted by the airplane window as the sky turned from a soft blue to a deep orange.
it would’ve been a pretty sight if it weren’t for the gun to your head.
you’d called in sick or put in your two weeks notice earlier if this was how your last day of being a flight attendant would end - but apparently, life hates you too much to let you catch a break.
HOUR 1 OF 7 - TAKEOFF
‘god- i can’t take this anymore,’ you thought to yourself. you hated waiting, despised it actually. 
after today, no more jet lag, rushed goodbyes or missing celebrations. you can finally unpack that suitcase for good, find someplace quiet and actually live in it. the thought alone was enough to keep you excited, but something bothered you at the back of your mind.
this trip didn’t feel right.
it wasn’t the plane itself, but your passengers? only 2 showed up in a plane that could seat at least 50 people. 
not that you were complaining. fewer passengers meant less work - which was a good thing. 
but the uneasiness you felt kept rising in your chest, no matter the times you tried to push it down. 
‘just 6 more hours,’ you thought. ‘then this will all be behind me.’
HOUR 2 OF 7 - MEALTIME
meal service started like any other: boring. 
after handing out the trays, you pushed the trolley back to its place and returned with beverages. you plastered on your most professional smile as you walked over to your passengers. “would you like a drink?”
the man with sunglasses turned to you lazily, his eyes shifting from the trolley to your face. “what do you have?”
you sighed, quietly but deeply. you had that stupid list engraved into your mind by now. “water, coffee, tea, coke, spri-” 
“-do you have alcohol?” he cut you off. 
your eye twitched. this dickhead.
first of all, he interrupted you. and secondly, you didn’t mention the alcohol on purpose. it was stored at the back of the plane and you did not have the energy to drag it out. 
“uh hongjoong- i mean, boss-“ the guy next to him whispered hurriedly. “i don’t think that’s a good idea-“
“-i think it is,” hongjoong interrupted before turning back to you. “where’s the menu?”
you gave him a forced smile as you pushed the alcohol menu towards him. he took his time with it, flipping through the pages slowly before finally saying, “two shots of whiskey.”
“sure thing,” you snatched the menu back. with a swift turn, you fetched the whiskey and the glasses, returning back to his seat.
you poured and placed the two shots on his tray table. he took the glass and drank it in one go, setting it back down with a thud. 
hongjoong then turned his head towards you, eyebrows raised. “what?”
you blinked. ‘what’? just ‘what’? where's the ‘thank you’? 
you were losing your mind.
“nothing,” you muttered through clenched teeth, moving away before he could ask for anything else.
grade A asshole.
HOUR 4.5 OF 7 - POINT OF NO RETURN
the shitty in-flight wifi was a joke as always. why did you even try?
with an annoyed sigh, you shoved your phone into your back pocket when suddenly-
static.
its piercing sound followed by faint garbled voices on the intercom startled you. you frowned as the sound continued, getting louder and more distorted.
with a groan, you stood up, straightening your uniform. ‘what are they doing?’ you thought as you walked towards the cockpit.
but when you passed by the first-class cabin, you paused. the seats were empty. both passengers were gone. ‘weird…’
things only got weirder as you approached the unlocked cockpit door. 
concerned, you pushed it open.
the smell hit you first - a metallic tang that twisted your stomach.
then your eyes caught up.
blood splattered the walls and windows in chaotic streaks, dripping down to the controls and the carpeted floor. the pilot and co-pilot laid in a gruesome pile to the side, the jagged holes in their skulls grotesque. 
a guy sat at the controls, steering the plane as though he wasn’t surrounded by horrors. 
grade A asshole- no, hongjoong, sat cross-legged on the floor, his sunglasses shattered at his feet. a gun rested in his hand and his lips curled into a smirk as he watched you enter.
“you’ve got to be kidding me..” you breathed out. 
pieces of brain and organ matter clung to the control panel as a simple blinking green light above that indicated that everything was, somehow, still functioning.
hongjoong tilted his head, amused. the gun shifted to point at what you now noticed was the crumpled bodies  of your pilots, their faces mangled in unrecognisable masses of flesh and bone.
“these your friends?”
you shook your head as you stepped back, wiping your sweaty hands on your uniform. hongjoong seemed to enjoy your reaction, his grin widening into something sickening. 
he smirked. “don’t worry, i won’t spoil that pretty face of yours.”
you coughed at the wretched smell as the crimson-stained carpet squelched beneath your heels, your mind begging you to leave.
“well-” you said, turning to the door. “i’m sure you don’t need me here, i’ll just-”
an audible click cut you off.
you froze.
slowly, you turned back to see a gun aimed directly at you.
“leaving so soon?” he raised an eyebrow. “let’s talk.”
HOUR 5 OF 7 - SKYDIVING DOESN’T SEEM TOO BAD
hongjoong dragged you to the first-class section to ‘talk’. it was the first time you’ve ever sat there and to be completely honest, this was not how you imagined yourself ‘enjoying’ it.
well, not like it mattered. you had other issues - like handcuffs locking you to the chair.
he stood infront of you, one hand gripping the gun while the other held a file. “‘____’, am i right?” he asked. 
you nodded slowly. “..that’s me.”
“3.6 GPA in university..” he muttered. “flunked out of med school during your first year..”
..how the hell did he get that information?
“you ended up as a flight attendant because your father owns the airline.”
“..yeah,” you reluctantly admitted, your stomach churning. “uh- was the med school part necessary?”
hongjoong ignored you, flipping to the next page. you watched his eyebrows shoot up as his eyes narrowed. “how close are you with your father?”
you blinked, confused by the weird question. “i mean- he’s my dad,” you replied. “but i haven’t seen him in years.”
“hm,” the sound came from him. hongjoong studied you for a moment longer before he spoke again, but this time, his voice was cold.
“do you know what he’s been doing during those years?”
your brows furrowed. “no, i-”
“killing. my. men.”
you didn’t even have time to process his words because he leaned forward when he said them, the gun uncomfortably close to your face. 
you swallowed the lump in your throat. “...are you sure you have the right person?”
his smirk widened into something eerie. “i have a gun pointed to you, don’t i?”
your pulse quickened. you couldn’t decide which was worse: the possibility that he was telling the truth or the fact that he was clearly enjoying your reaction.
“i always wanted to get back at that pig..” he held the gun up to the bottom of your chin, forcing you to meet his eyes. “and look at how kind the world is- blessing me with his daughter.”
you struggled to breathe, to think. the handcuffs dug into your wrist as you unconsciously tried to break out of them, a clink against the metal arm of the chair.
your voice trembled. “..what do you want from me?”
hongjoong didn’t answer immediately. instead, he leaned in even closer, so close that you could feel your foreheads touching.
“what i want,” he said slowly, eyes locked onto yours. “is for your dad to suffer.”
HOUR 6 OF 7 - SURPRISINGLY ALIVE
the stuffiness of the plane did little to calm your nerves. you sat quietly in the seat, staring at the shattered remains of your phone on the floor.
hongjoong snatched it from your hands a few minutes ago, grumbling about how ‘you don’t need devices’. great. just great. 
the sound of the cockpit door creaking open drew your attention. the other guy - or ‘pilot’, stepped out, adjusting the cuffs of his sleeves. “boss.”
hongjoong raised an eyebrow. “what?”
the ‘pilot’ moved closer to hongjoong, lowering his voice. “air traffic control was notified of our path,” he said quietly. “they know something’s off with the plane, but i have no idea how.”
hongjoong’s eyes darkened as he processed the information. then, he glared at you, like he was accusing you.
you scoffed. “you shot my phone, how would i even contact anyone?”
for a moment, the two of you locked eyes and you swear that you could see him debating whether to believe you.
the ‘pilot’ cleared his throat. “what should we expect?” he asked nervously.
hongjoong leaned back in his seat, running a hand through his hair. “the police.”
HOUR 7 OF 7 - SHIT IS GETTING REAL
“what the hell…” you whispered to yourself as you peered out of the window.
SWAT teams and federal agents stood in rows, their weapons pointed directly at the plane. flashing lights of red and blue lit up the empty airport. 
you turned away from the window, watching hongjoong pull out a burner phone from his jacket. his fingers typed something out before he suddenly snapped the phone in half, tossing the remains on the floor. 
“…who are you?” you asked quietly.
he raised an eyebrow. “you don’t need to know, pretty.”
your survival instincts told you to move, to do something. but the second you tried to stand, hongjoong shoved you back down. 
“stay seated until we land,” he said before tilting his head. “isn’t that your job?”
you rolled your eyes, gripping the armrests as you tried to calm yourself down and steady your breathing. 
but that was when you heard it - gunshots. 
“they’re shooting us?” you panicked, flinching with each sound. 
no answer.
“hey-“ you tried again, but was cut off by the tires hitting the terrain. 
the landing was rough - harsher than anything you’ve experienced as a flight attendant. the plane rattled like never before.
your chest tightened when it rolled over something particularly large. “what was that?” your voice cracked. 
no answer. 
when the plane finally came to a halt, you barely had time to catch your breath when hongjoong moved. in a blink, he uncuffed you from the chair, only to secure the handcuffs on your wrists once more. 
he brought you to your feet, pulling you so close that you could feel his breath against your ear. “don’t do anything stupid,” he hissed. 
the cockpit door opened and the ‘pilot’ appeared. he quickly unlocked the emergency exit and you saw the makeshift ramp that had been attached to the side of the plane. 
a van rested just outside of it, hongjoong dragging you towards the vehicle. you descended the ramp, the cool air hitting your face as you looked around. 
but that was when you saw it. 
blood. 
on the wheels of the plane, the dark colour leaving a fresh trail on the ground.  
“did you..” you gulped, your voice barely above a whisper. “did you run over them?”
hongjoong glanced at you. “i didn’t,” he shrugged. “the plane did.”
you stopped in your tracks, your feet stuck rooted to the ground as you stared at him in horror. how could he say that like it was no big deal? just who was this man?
“move,” hongjoong ordered. but when you didn’t, he clicked his tongue, rolling his eyes. “god- you’re such a brat.”
before you knew it, you were shoved into the back of the van. the ‘pilot’ closed the door with a loud slam and sat in the driver’s seat while hongjoong took the passenger’s seat up front. 
you met hongjoong’s eyes through the rearview mirror. his glare was sharp, acting as a warning to keep your mouth shut. you didn’t need to be told twice.
the van drove forward and you caught glimpses of city lights in the distance, slowly growing closer. civilisation - maybe you could get help. 
but against your mind’s wishes, you felt your eyelids getting heavy - and you did something that no one should ever do when they’re in a car with armed strangers.
you fell asleep.
HOUR 14 OF 7 - HIP HIP HOORAY YOU’RE NOT DEAD
you heard a voice whine. “why can’t we kill her?” 
“do you want boss to kill us?” you heard another reply.
your eyes fluttered open. your head felt heavy as the room came into focus, your stomach twisting. 
the space was dingy, poorly lit by a bulb hanging from the ceiling and an unnecessarily tall lamp on the ground. the walls were stained and the air stunk of blood.
you tried to move, only to feel tight ropes against your wrists and ankles. you were tied to a chair.
“i can’t believe we have to babysit the pig’s daughter,” a man with a knife groaned.
“calm down, wooyoung,” the other one sighed.
“calm down?!” wooyoung exclaimed. “yeosang got to fly a plane! how is that fair?”
“he has a license,” the second man rolled his eyes. 
“it’s still a plane, jongho-”
“shut up,” jongho interrupted. “the girl’s awake.”
both men turned their heads to look at you, the sudden attention sending a shiver down your spine. wooyoung’s grin stretched across his face as he got to his feet, jongho following behind.
“aw look who’s finally awake,” wooyoung approached, his voice childish. “you slept like a baby- and we didn’t even drug you!”
your heartbeat quickened as he leaned in close, his grin widening as he studied your face.
“i read your file,” he began. “you’re smart…” wooyoung paused, his eyes inspecting you and your ridiculous uniform. “and hot.”
your throat tightened, but you forced yourself to respond. “thank you-?”
“-what’s your favourite feature about yourself?” he asked, twirling the knife in his hands.
“uh-” your mind scrambled for an answer as he got nearer, the knife glinting. “i- my eyes?”
“your eyes,” wooyoung repeated, the grin stuck to his face. “good choice.”
he brought the knife closer, the cold steel trailing down the side of your face. you flinched as the blade hovered near your eye, your breath hitching.
“you’re going to answer all our questions,” he stated, almost in a sing-songy way. “and if you dont-”
he tilted the knife, now directly above your eyeball. “-i’ll dig those lovely pearls out of your sockets.”
your chest tightened, terror paralyzing you from head to toe. you couldn’t even breathe, every cell in your body pleading you to stay still.
“hey-” jongho tapped wooyoung on the shoulder, whispering. “uh.. boss said we can’t scratch her..”
“are you serious?” wooyoung scoffed. “then what’s the point?”
jongho bit the inside of his cheek, avoiding eye contact with his friend.
wooyoung groaned, throwing the knife to the ground with a strength that made it bend. “fuck this- torture isn’t even fun anymore.”
he stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him.
silence was in the air until jongho cleared his throat awkwardly. he turned to face you. “uh..” he hesitated, rubbing the back of his neck. 
“change of plans.”
HOUR 15 OF 7 - DAY DRINKING IS FUN
you never imagined yourself in a hideout, drinking vodka with one of your captors - yet here you were. 
the whole thing felt absurd: a shaky barstool beneath you and a scuffed counter separating you and jongho. he poured you a shot he claimed was ‘very expensive’, before proceeding to chug most of the vodka from the bottle in a long gulp. 
your legs were untied now, though your wrists were still bound, the rope loose enough for your hands to rest infront of you. “what are we waiting for?” you asked. “hongjoong?”
jongho froze, his eyes snapping to yours. “don’t say his name,” he whisper-shouted.
you raised your tied wrists in apology. “okay.. what should i call him?”
“call him boss.. or mr kim.. or anything that isn’t his first name,” jongho said, his words rushed. 
you nodded slowly, looking at the man infront of you with mild concern. he looked even more scared than you did. 
then suddenly, the door slammed open. 
both you and jongho flinched, watching two figures stumble in. 
the first was a tall man - storming into the room. the second was him, hongjoong, clutching his side in pain.
“mingi- boss!” jongho panicked instantly as he ran to help the injured man. “holy- you’re hurt!”
“the pig called for backup,” mingi sighed heavily. 
you blinked, stunned as the sound of hongjoong coughing violently brought your attention back to the injured man. 
blood seeped through his fingers, staining his sleeves and skin. you don’t know what took over you, but you pushed yourself off of the barstool and rushed towards him. 
“what do you think you’re doing?” mingi stepped infront of hongjooong, his hand resting on his gun protectively. 
you glared at him. “do you want your boss to bleed out?”
mingi studied you. after what felt like ages, he exhaled sharply and stepped aside. “fine,” he muttered, keeping a hand on his weapon. 
you knelt next to hongjoong, trying to make him face you as you grabbed his arm. though, he snatched himself away from you quickly. 
you rolled your eyes. “i’m trying to help you. let me see it.”
hongjoong’s eyes pierced your soul. you could see the cogs in his head turning on whether he could trust you. 
a few moments passed before he finally faced you with a sigh, revealing a large gash on the side of his stomach - a wound created by knife. 
“i need water.” 
jongho blinked, clearly thrown off. “what?”
“to clean his wound..?” you explained. “get me water. now.”
jongho hesitated before snatching a bottle of water from a mini fridge. he pushed it to you, the little amount of liquid sloshing inside. “you should stay still for this,” you said before slowly pouring the water over the wound. 
crap- a gash this big needed a stitch. 
“untie me,” you said, holding your wrists up to your captors. 
jongho glanced at his boss worriedly for permission. hongjoong gave a small nod and jongho quickly pulled out a small knife to cut the rope. 
once free, you quickly looked around for something to stitch his wound with. when nothing looked remotely useful, your eyes dropped to your uniform - a skirt with a yarn trim. it wasn’t ideal, but it would have to do.
you began to unravel the yarn from the hem.
“what are you doing?” mingi asked, frowning.
“stitching him,” you sighed as your fingers worked hurriedly. “or do you want him to get an infection?”
hongjoong let out a groan, shifting uncomfortably. “just hurry.”
you finished unravelling it, but now you needed a needle. your hand instinctively reached up to your hair - pulling out a small bobby pin. it was definitely not as sharp as a needle, but you’re sure that hongjoong can handle his pain.
“shit- i need to sterilise this,” you muttered, mostly to yourself.
“vodka,” jongho said instantly, grabbing the bottle and handing it to you.
you poured the small amount over the pin, letting it drip onto the floor. then, threading the yarn through the makeshift needle, you glanced at hongjoong.
“this will hurt,” you warned.
he looked at you with clenched teeth. “i don’t care.”
you placed a hand on his side to steady him, feeling the tension in his muscles as he tried to not flinch. carefully, you began to stitch the gash, each pull making him wince. 
when the stitching was complete, you tied the yarn and tore it off with your teeth - but the wound was still bleeding slightly.
you glanced down at your sleeves. without hesitation, you tore a strip of fabric free. you used it to dab away the excess blood, then folded the remaining fabric to wrap it around his side. 
“that should work. for now,” you sat back as you wiped your forehead with your arm.
“...you know how to treat people?” hongjoong asked, wincing slightly. 
you nodded slowly. “yeah.. i know the basics.”
“hm,” he tilted his head. “you’re more useful than i thought.”
you blinked. was a good thing or a bad thing?
“wooyoung,” he yelled out. 
a loud crash was heard in another room, followed by the muffled sounds of frantic movements. within seconds, wooyoung appeared in the doorway. 
“yes, boss?” wooyoung said out of breath, brushing off his shirt as he looked around the room. 
hongjoong didn’t respond immediately. instead, he looked you up and down, his lips twitching into what seemed like a smirk. “get her some actual clothes. we have an event to catch.”
HOUR 17 OF 7 - WORDS TALK BUT GUNS TALK LOUDER
“woah..” your eyes took in the building before you. glittering lights and an impressive exterior that was way more extravagant than anything you imagined hongjoong to be involved in.
he parked the car, the engine coming to a stop. before you could say anything, hongjoong stepped out of the car, closing the door shut. you scrambled to follow him, your heels clicking against the pavement as you caught up.
the two of you approached the man stationed at the door - a bouncer with a pen and clipboard.
without warning, hongjoong’s hand snaked around your waist, pulling you snugly against his side. you flinched at the sudden contact, but with how tight his grip was, there was no room for protests.
“ah, mr kim,” the bouncer greeted. “you made it.”
hongjoong offered a brief, fake smile before dropping it immediately. “let us in.”
“hold on now,” the bouncer said, flipping through the papers on the clipboard. “we can’t let her inside.”
hongjoong’s brows furrowed. “why?”
“new policy,” the man sighed, pretending to sound disappointed. “no more plus-ones.”
hongjoong rolled his eyes, not bothering to respond. instead, he reached into his blazer, about to pull out a-
“nevermind!” the bouncer’s face turned pale. he stepped aside with a nervous laugh. “you’re all set- enjoy the night.”
the interior was breathtaking - chandeliers hung from high ceilings and round tables were scattered across the venue, draped in pristine white table cloths. 
“don’t eat or drink anything here.”
you blinked, nodding slowly at hongjoong’s words. “okay.. but why-”
“-and if you really want to stay alive,” he interrupted, his lips brushing your ear. “don't leave my sight.”
his voice sent a chill down your spine. “okay,” you mumbled as he brought you further into the room.
he led you to a seating area - though it looked more like a conversation pit, where an old man sat waiting. 
hongjoong released his grip on you to sit across the man, gesturing for you to follow. you hesitated briefly before settling next to him.
“mr kim,” the old man greeted gruffly. his eyes shifted to you, studying your face. “i see you brought someone.”
hongjoong gave a nod, glancing at you. “introduce yourself, brat.”
“oh uh-” you put out your hand reluctantly, forcing a polite smile. “i’m ‘____’.”
the old man’s eyes narrowed before they widened in realisation. “her father-“
“-i’m glad you noticed,” hongjoong cut in. he slowly reached into his blazer again, but this time, he actually pulled out his pistol. 
your eyes widened as he aimed it to your waist, the cold metal brushing your side. “wha-“
“w-what are you doing?” the old man’s face drained of colour, panic flashing in his eyes. 
hongjoong tilted his head. “let’s negotiate.”
“mr kim-“ the old man began, his voice cracking. “as his friend, you do understand that i have to tell him she’s here.”
“do it,” hongjoong shrugged, leaning back. his arm returned to your waist, pulling you to him as he tapped the gun against your side. 
“let’s see if he values his money more than his own daughter.”
HOUR 18 OF 7 - LIFE ISN’T FAIR
a loud crash echoed through the venue, making you jump. the sound of heavy footsteps grew violent with every second.
hongjoong’s hand tightened around your waist as he stood, dragging you up with him. “move.”
“wait-!” the old man called after you, but hongjoong didn’t stop.
his grip on you was firm, the barrel of his gun pressing against your stomach. you tripped over your feet, struggling to keep up his pace.
“where are you taking me?” you panicked as you glanced over your shoulder at the armed men closing in.
“to your father, princess,” he sneered, his voice mockingly sweet. 
“mr kim! stop right there!” 
you froze, whipping your head around. standing at the far end of the room, infront of a small army of armed men, was your father. 
“let go of my daughter,” your father ordered. he pointed a gun directly at hongjoong, his men following suit. 
your eyes glanced around the room - seeing guests cowering against the walls, some injured and others dead.
“i’m not giving up the brat until i get what i want,” hongjoong demanded.
“what you want is an impossible amount of money!” your father yelled, his grip on his gun tightening.
“impossible?” hongjoong’s eyes widened with craze. “you have more than $500 million tied to your name! did you think i’ll forget who you killed to get here?”
your blood ran cold. “dad.. you killed people?” you asked, your voice trembling as you looked at him.
for a split second, your father’s eyes softened, though that quickly disappeared with a scoff.
“if i didn’t, you wouldn’t have a roof over your head,” your father spat. “you were too stubborn to do anything after you dropped med school.”
the world seemed to tilt, your father’s words more piercing than any bullet. “but i didn’t-”
“-you did,” your father interrupted you. “i spent all that money bribing them just for you to fuck up.”
your heart sank as tears welled in your eyes. hongjoong noticed your reaction, his grip on the gun loosening slightly. 
“i’d appreciate it if you didn’t make my hostage cry,” he said. “do you really want those to be your last words to her?”
“shut up,” your father snarled, his finger close to the trigger. “i’ll say what i want. she’s too stupid to argue back anyway.”
the tears you held back spilled over and all you could hear was your dad shouting, “get her!”
HOUR 18.5 OF 7 - THEY WANT YOU SOO BAD
gunshots were heard in every direction, completely deafening. 
the pungent smell of gunpowder burned your nose as you stumbled, your legs barely holding you up. hongjoong shoved you to the ground, his hand against your back. 
“stay down,” he ordered you, raising his gun and firing without hesitation.
you flinched with every shot, watching in horror as armed men fell one by one with his aim. the world felt like it was spinning too fast and you could barely keep up.
suddenly, a hand grabbed your arm.
“stop moving!” your father yelled, his grip painful as he dragged you towards the exit.
“no!” you choked out, your heels digging into the floor in an attempt to resist. panic ran through your veins as your eyes darted around desperately.
your eyes landed on a fallen gun near your feet. you quickly snatched it, hands trembling as you tried to point it towards him.
“don’t make me do this!” you cried.
your father didn’t stop and without thinking-
-you pulled the trigger.
a bang was heard, followed by his rough scream as he collapsed to the floor, clutching his bleeding thigh.
“oh my god,” you whispered, the gun slipping from your hands as tears flowed uncontrollably down your cheeks. you sank to the floor, staring at the blood pouring out of him.
“you bitch!” he shouted in pain.
out of the corner of your eye, you caught hongjoong watching you, something strange flashing across his face. was that.. surprise? pride? maybe he was impressed?
hongjoong fired a shot at an armed man without looking, moving to you quickly. 
“didn’t think you had it in you, pretty,” he looked over his shoulder. “but we need to leave.”
he led you to a small janitor’s closet near the exit. the narrow space smelled of bleach, but at least it was quiet.
hongjoong shut the door behind you and dusted off his blazer. without a word, his dark eyes inspected you, checking your shoulders and arms.
you stood motionless, too shocked to stop him as he gently tilted your chin up, his thumb wiping away the mascara-stained tears from your cheeks.
“nothing broken,” he muttered, more to himself than to you. “no scars either..”
he pulled out a burner phone, typing something quickly.
“i- i just shot my dad,” your shoulders shook as new tears welled up in your eyes.
hongjoong glanced up from the phone, meeting your eyes. “..are you bragging?” he asked bluntly.
“what? he’s my dad-”
“-and he’s a dick,” hongjoong cut you off. “you might share blood, but that man clearly hates you.”
you hiccuped, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand. “...am i going to hell?”
hongjoong scoffed. “come on-“ he began, but stopped himself when he looked at you and the tears spilling from your eyes. “you didn’t kill him… you’re fine.” 
you opened your mouth to protest but he silenced you as he continued typing. “and even if you did,” he added. “you’re doing the world a favour.”
he smashed the burner phone onto the ground, discarding the pieces. he reloaded his pistol before turning back to you, wrapping his arm around your shoulders as he led you through bodies and debris.
outside, a black van waited by the curb. hongjoong pushed you inside before climbing in after you, slamming the door shut behind him.
“drive,” he ordered.
as the street lights went past you, you slumped in your seat, completely exhausted. “where are we going?” you asked softly.
hongjoong studied you for a moment, watching your eyelids go heavy. “...go to sleep, brat.”
DAY 2 - OH HONEY I'M HOME
you woke up with a jolt. you sat up from the couch you laid down on, completely disoriented. your eyes darted around the dimly lit room. the hideout. 
relief and fear spread within you. you were safe - for now.
just then, a knock from the doorway made you jump. “didn’t mean to scare you,” a man said, leaning against the frame. “boss wanted me to check on you.”
you blinked. “i- okay,” you coughed to clear your throat, wincing at how dry it felt.
“i’ll let him know you’re awake.”
and with that, he disappeared down the hall, leaving you alone once more.
though that didn’t last long. moments later, hongjoong entered. he carried a stool over, setting it down across from you before sitting. 
“how long did i sleep?” you asked hoarsely.
“a day,” he replied with a shrug.
your eyes widened. it was only then you noticed your attire - a baggy t-shirt replacing the outfit you were wearing before.
“who changed me?” you blurted out, heat rising to your cheeks.
“i did,” hongjoong answered. he noticed your flustered expression, tilting his head. “what?”
“did you-” you cleared your throat. “did you see anything?”
“i’m not a pervert,” he scoffed. “if it makes you feel better, you were changed in the dark.”
you fell into an awkward, heavy silence as you sat across each other. for the first time, there was no danger, no gunfire or anyone yelling out orders. just silence.
“your dad..” hongjoong began, speaking up. “wants you dead.”
“...what?”
he held up a cassette tape, tossing it onto the table between you, your hands trembling as you picked it up. hongjoong then brought out a cassette tape player, allowing you to hear your father’s voice.
‘mr kim, we’ve had our ups and downs, but i’m sure that we can agree on one thing - that bitch who shot my thigh is a liability. an idiot that made it this far because of me. she’s no longer my responsibility or family, so expect to find her head on a stick when you turn your back. have fun.’
“what the fuck..” you whispered shakily as it came to an end. 
“to be honest, your only purpose was to be a hostage.” hongjoong’s fingers drummed the edge of the stool. “and now that he doesn’t want you.. you’re useless-”
the world around you crumbled, his words making you feel worse. 
“-to him.”
your eyes widened, looking at him in confusion.
“you’re smart,” he shrugged. “and you stitched me.”
you blinked. “…where are you going with this?” 
“i want you to be an addition to my team,” he replied.
“do i have to kill people?” you blurted out. “or steal, or-”
“no,” hongjoong raised a hand to cut you off. “all you’ll be doing is treating my injured men. quite the opposite of killing.”
you frowned, furrowing your eyebrows. “why would you trust me with that?”
“because,” he said, leaning forward. “you have nowhere else to go.”
“that’s not true-”
“really?” hongjoong smirked. “do you know how many businesses your dad owns?”
you shook your head.
“more than 80% in the country,” his eyes sparkled with something dark. “now that you’ve shot him, you’ve burnt every bridge he’s built for you.”
your jaw dropped. “but-”
“no job, no family, nowhere to live either since he owns most of the real estate here.”
you stared at him, struggling to process his words.
“here’s my offer,” hongjoong continued. “you get a decent amount of money, a place to live and protection...”
“...just to treat people?” you asked in disbelief.
he nodded. 
you bit your lip, staring at the floor as you picked at your nails. how could your dad do this to you? abandoning you just like that? and now he wanted you dead? you could feel yourself getting angry just thinking about him.
after a long moment, you lifted your head, meeting his gaze. “deal.” 
MONTH 1 - FAMILY BONDING 
that evening, you sat on the floor with san, wooyoung and yeosang, eating a batch of cheap instant noodles. it was a little awkward - mostly because you just joined, but you were silently appreciating their efforts to make small talk with you. 
suddenly, a loud bang was heard through the hideout. the three men jumped up immediately, pulling guns and knives from who knows where. 
“back entrance?” wooyoung asked as he sharpened his knives. 
your heart raced as you watched the three of them shift into combat mode - and you caught yourself lagging behind. you hurriedly stood up and grabbed the medical kit you kept close. 
“stay here,” san said firmly. 
you shook your head. “if someone’s injured, i’m coming.”
the three of them shared a look before yeosang gave you a reluctant nod. “…just stay behind us. we’ll get in trouble if you get hurt.”
they moved swiftly and silently through the narrow halls of the hideout, weapons in hand. you trailed closely, your heart pounding as you gripped the medical kit tightly. 
when you reached the back entrance, san motioned you to stay back while they checked the door. 
the signs of forced entry were obvious - the lock was broken and scuff marks lined the floor. 
wooyoung scoffed, speaking under his breath. “stupid piglets.”
yeosang sighed. “looks like they took a few weapons and left.”
“are they testing us?” san asked, inspecting a footprint on the ground. 
before anyone could respond, the door slammed open making all of you jump. you turned to see mingi, his chest heaving as he leaned against the door frame. 
“meeting. now.”
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
the hideout’s ‘meeting room’ was more of a cramped closet with mismatched chairs and a comically large table in the middle. hongjoong paced at the end of the room, his jaw clenched. 
“we can’t stay here any longer,” he began. “it’s only a matter of time before they come back in full force.”
hongjoong stopped pacing and crossed his arms. “we need to move back to our old apartments. they’re scattered enough to keep us hidden until we figure out our next move.”
you shifted uncomfortably. 
hongjoong noticed this. “what?” he asked, his sharp eyes landing on you. 
“i uh-“ you hesitated. “i don’t have a home..” you said sheepishly. 
hongjoong raised an eyebrow. 
“my dad owns the house,” you admitted. “and that’s not really an option anymore.”
“right,” hongjoong sighed, running a hand through his hair. “shit..”
“alright, who has space?” he clapped, glancing around the room. 
everyone exchanged uneasy looks. 
“we don’t,” yeosang said, gesturing to himself, san, wooyoung and jongho. “the four of us are already crammed into one place.”
“same here,” yunho spoke up. “mingi and i barely fit in ours.”
hongjoong turned to seonghwa, his face hopeful. 
“no,” seonghwa said without hesitation. 
a heavy sigh escaped hongjoong as he pinched the bridge of his nose. he leaned against the table, deep in thought. 
minutes stretched into what felt like hours before hongjoong finally spoke up. “you’re coming with me,” he said, looking directly at you. 
your eyes widened in surprise. “..what?”
“you’re staying at my place.”
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
the car sped down the (somewhat) empty highway, the faint smell of vanilla from the air freshener mixing with the lingering scent of old fast food. 
you gripped the edge of your seat as the streetlights ran by the window in a blur. “are we in a rush?” you nervously glanced at hongjoong. 
“no,” he replied flatly. 
there was a black car beside you that had been keeping pace for the past few minutes - and just as you shifted in your seat, it suddenly swerved infront of your car and slammed the brakes. 
“what the-” you barely managed to say before the impact. the car jolted violently as it hit the one ahead, the sound of metal crunching loud. 
hongjoong let out a low string of curses under his breath. his face was weirdly calm as he unbuckled his seatbelt, stepping out of the car without a word. 
“wait-” you scrambled to undo your own seatbelt. 
from your seat, you saw him approaching the car. the moment he glanced inside, his eyes widened. he reached for his gun and pulled the trigger instantly. 
the loud gunshot made you flinch and your stomach twisted as you saw the slumped figure in the driver’s seat, blood splattered across the windshield. 
your heart pounded as you stumbled out of the car, rushing towards him. “why did you do that?!”
hongjoong turned to you, his jaw clenched. “it was a piglet.”
“wha-“ your eyes drifted to the body, a shiver going down your spine as you saw the bullet hole clean through the skull. 
hongjoong, completely unfazed, went back to the car. you stared at the lifeless body for a moment longer before hurriedly following him. 
once you were back inside, you swallowed the lump in your throat, attempting to break the suffocating silence. “….how did you know he was a piglet?”
hongjoong didn’t respond immediately. his fingers flexed against the steering wheel as he glanced at you. 
“they have a bullet tattoo..” he said finally, pulling down his collar to point to his collarbone. “..right here.”
you blinked. “oh.”
“if you ever come across one,” he continued. “kill them on sight.”
your eyes widened, your throat tightening. “what about the police?”
he fell silent for a second, his eyes fixed on the road. then, a faint smirk crossed his face. “you don’t need to worry about them.”
his answer left you unsettled, but before you could question him further, the apartment building came into view. it was modern - standing tall with the city skyline. 
hongjoong smoothly pulled into the parking lot. the abruptness of the stop sent you forward, but his hand shot out instinctively, pressing against you to keep you steady. 
“sorry,” he muttered, his voice soft - though he didn’t look at you as he retracted his arm. 
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
some might describe hongjoong’s apartment as ‘minimalistic’, but to you, it’s just an excuse for a grown man to avoid decorating. 
the walls were devoid of any art or family photos, the kitchen was spotless - though it was definitely untouched with how there was almost no food in the fridge. and from what you saw, the only source of entertainment was a lone TV. 
“do you..” you began, looking around the bare space. “do you even live here?”
hongjoong ignored your comment and walked towards the big couch and began to pull it into a makeshift bed. the springs creaked slightly as he unfolded it. “this is where you’ll be sleeping,” he said, dusting himself off. 
“cool.”
“don’t complain-“ he stopped himself mid-sentence and narrowed his eyes when he realised what you said. “wait, you’re okay with this?”
you blinked. “…yeah?”
“hm,” he said, slightly surprised. he looked you up and down before turning to the long hallway. “get some rest, we’re getting you a phone tomorrow.”
MONTH 2 - LIVE LAUGH LOVE GUNS
you should’ve known it wouldn’t be long before the piglets attacked you again. 
hongjoong sent you on a simple supply run - nothing unusual. but as you stood in the small pharmacy, you felt the air shift when the cashier’s demeanour turned cold. 
it all happened so fast. 
the moment you saw the gun aimed at your chest, your eyes fell to the faint outline of a bullet tattoo peeking out from his collarbone. great. 
your breath hitched as your body moved on impulse. you barely avoided the first shot as you ducked behind the display rack. 
the pharmacy was strangely empty, no one else to intervene. your heart pounded as the sounds of footsteps and gunshots echoed. 
fumbling with your phone, you dialed every number you could think of. yet, no one answered. 
your hands trembled as you typed hongjoong’s number, your last resort. 
he picked up after one ring. 
“this better be important, brat,” he grumbled, groggy like he just woke up. 
“i need help-” you semi-yelled as you narrowly dodged another shot, darting behind the counter. “i’m getting attacked-”
“-send your location,” hongjoong interrupted. “i’m on my way.”
the line went dead before you could respond. 
you sent your location and shoved the phone back into your pocket. the cashier reloaded the gun, his footsteps growing louder. and just as you moved, he charged. 
he grabbed you, trying to pin you down. you barely managed to fight back, until you made an educated attack - kicking him in the groin. 
he groaned, stumbling back. you took the opportunity to snatch the gun from his hands. 
you pointed it at him, your hands shaking. “stay back,” your voice cracked. 
the man scoffed. “over my dead body,” he lunged at you again. 
your finger moved instinctively, pulling the trigger. 
once. 
twice. 
again and again and again. 
the sound of gunfire rang in your ears, the recoil sending waves through your arms. you didn’t stop until you heard a clicking noise that meant that the gun was empty. 
when you opened your eyes, he was no longer standing. 
you looked down, the cashier laying sprawled on the ground, the concrete dark with blood. bullet holes littered his body, evidence of your frantic shots. 
you dropped to your knees, your chest heaving. you reached out to check his pulse. nothing.
you just took someone’s life. 
your eyes fell to your hands, bloody and shaking. from young, you always wanted to save lives - not take them. tears fell from your eyes, blurring your vision. 
the door slammed open. 
hongjoong stood in the doorway. he took in the body on the floor and your frozen form in a single glance. he sighed, stepping in. 
“come on, let’s go,” he crouched to grab your arm. 
you couldn’t move, your eyes fixed on the lifeless body. 
“hey,” his fingers gripped your jaw, tilting your face to meet his. his eyes were intense, his touch warm against your cold skin. “we need to leave before more show up. you don’t want to kill anyone else, do you?”
you shook your head quickly. 
he pulled you to your feet, wrapping his arm around yours as he guided you to his car. the ride back was silent as you stared out of the window. 
and before you knew it, you were back at his apartment. 
you hesitated at the door, unable to bring yourself to step inside. 
hongjoong sighed, grabbing your wrist as he tugged you in. he tossed his gun and his keys in the kitchen counter before turning to you. 
“go take a long shower. i’ll be in the living room.”
you nodded, moving to the bathroom in a daze. 
the water was scalding as it hit your skin. no amount of soap or scrubbing would ever make you feel clean from the bloodied-stains. every part of your body felt foreign - even your puffy eyes and lips.
once you were done, you dressed in the softest clothes you had, hoping that it would provide you with some form of comfort (it didn’t).
the pull-out couch was prepared with brand-new pillows and fluffy blankets when you returned to the living room. hongjoong sat on the edge, gesturing for you to sit. you sank down beside him. 
the silence stretched on until it became unbearable. 
you spoke up, your voice barely audible. “…i killed someone.”
“you did,” he nodded. “good job.”
your head snapped up, your eyes wide. “i killed someone.”
“and so have i,” hongjoong leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees. “does that bother you?”
“i…”
he leaned back. “it should. the first time always does.”
“i don’t think i can do this,” you breathed out shakily. “i don’t want to hurt people..”
the two of you locked eyes for what felt like ages. you could see hongjoong’s adam's apple bob up and down, his jaw tightening slightly. “no one wants to hurt people,” he replied softly. 
you blinked. 
“i shouldn’t have sent you out alone, especially with your dad targeting you,” he sighed. “that’s on me.”
“but-”
“-though i do have to say, this made me realise how.. unprepared you are,” he continued.
your eyebrows furrowed. 
“if you want to survive, you need to know how to defend yourself,” he drummed his fingers against the couch. “...you’re off supply runs. from now on, you’re training with the others.”
you stared at him. “what?”
“the rest have some ‘schedule’ for training. i’m sure you can join without any problems.”
you hesitated. the thought of the blood, the body, the gun in your hands made you nauseous. the idea of training scared you. 
he noticed this, his eyes softening slightly. “you won’t be a killer, just someone capable of self-defense.”
you swallowed the lump in your throat. finally, you nodded, your voice small. “okay.”
MONTH 3 - LET’S GO GAMBLING!
the casino was glitzy and loud with copyright-free music, its neon lights casting eerie shadows on the dark streets outside. 
“you three, cover left. you two, check the vault. the rest of you will stay near the exit,” hongjoong ordered.
you waited for your assignment, expecting to be grouped with someone. instead, hongjoong said, “you’re with me.”
you sighed. “alright.”
you followed hongjoong to the right side of the casino, the sounds of laughter and clinking glasses filling the space. he moved silently, keeping his gun concealed but ready. you tried to mimic his focus, clutching the knife wooyoung lent you earlier.
the first sign of trouble came when the alarms blared.
armed men swarmed into the casino. piglets.
hongjoong moved first, taking them down in a single shot. you ducked behind a pillar, your heart pounding.
the fight moved fast. hongjoong was precise - he wasn’t even touchable, killing the men easily.
but that was when you saw it before he did: a piglet creeping up behind him, raising and aiming the gun to his head.
“boss!”
without hesitation, you hurled wooyoung’s knife to the piglet.
the knife pierced and plunged into his neck, causing the man to fall, his gun clattering to the ground. 
hongjoong whipped his head around with wide eyes, shooting the man infront of him before spinning to kill the piglet you just hit.
the silence that followed was deafening.
hongjoong’s breathing was heavy as he lowered his weapon. he dusted his clothes off, looking at you with an unreadable expression.
he gulped, finally speaking up. “...good job, pretty.” 
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
slowly, everyone regrouped in the corner, collapsing onto the floor in a circle. bottles of water were passed around as everyone caught their breaths.
for a while, no one spoke, the only sounds being an occasional groan.
“hey,” wooyoung hiccuped, breaking the silence as he turned to you. “give me my knife back.”
you looked at him awkwardly before handing him his completely bloody and dented knife - basically ruined.
“what the hell!” he exclaimed. “that was one of my favourites!”
you shrugged. “you shouldn’t have given it to me then.”
“i didn’t know you were actually gonna use it,” wooyoung complained. “i thought you would just watch.”
“you’re such a dick,” you rolled your eyes.
wooyoung leaned in closer - his voice annoyingly sweet. “aw, don’t be mad, sweetheart. i’ll get you a better knife- one that won’t bend in your delicate fucking hands.”
“shut up,” you groaned, shoving him lightly as the others chuckled.
hongjoong leaned against the wall, his arm crossed over his chest. his eyes shifted from wooyoung to you. 
his chest tightened in a now-familiar way: you’re fitting in too well.
it wasn’t jealousy - at least, that’s what he told himself. it was about control. your presence was a distraction he didn’t account for. but the others took you in so easily, which was technically a good thing, right?
and yet...
why did his stomach twist every time one of them smiled at you?
hongjoong blinked, realising how his leg was bouncing restlessly. he forced himself to stop, sighing deeply.
“you good, boss?” yunho asked.
hongjoong paused. “...i’m fine.”
yunho raised an eyebrow but didn’t question it, turning away.
hongjoong’s eyes returned to you. you were leaning a little too close to yeosang now, laughing at some joke wooyoung said - sending a strange pang through his chest.
why did this bother him so much?
you weren’t doing anything wrong. you were building trust, meshing with the group - just like he expected.
but this wasn’t about the group, was it?
he frowned, thinking. you stitched him right after he kidnapped you, you saved him from getting shot even though you were definitely not ready to fight.
what has he ever done for you?
introduced you to a world of crime? to a world of killing, stealing and hatred? accidentally ruined the relationship between you and your dad?
hongjoong closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose.
shit.
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
without bothering to change, you sank into the pull-out couch - exhaustion pulling you to it like gravity.
you heard hongjoong locking the door behind him, the soft click sounding loud in the quiet apartment. his footsteps shuffled toward the kitchen, the sounds of cabinets opening and closing reaching your ears. you were way too tired to look.
you didn’t realise you drifted off until you were awoken by something heavy on your body.
your eyes fluttered open groggily. for a moment, you thought you were dreaming. hongjoong was in the middle of draping a large blanket on you.
“what are you doing?” you mumbled, your voice thick with sleep.
his eyes darted to yours briefly. “nothing.”
you frowned, shifting to sit up - but he placed a hand on your shoulder, pressing you gently back down. “sleep.”
you let out a quiet sigh. “shouldn’t you be sleeping?” you muttered.
he paused, his jaw tensing. “....tomorrow onwards, you’re training with me.”
you stared at him, stunned. before you could even say anything, he turned and walked away without a word.
…did your boss just tuck you in?
MONTH 3.5 -  PUNCH, KICK, SNARE
“again,” hongjoong said, slightly out of breath. 
the living room felt smaller than usual with the two of you moving around. the coffee table and couch was pushed aside, leaving just enough space to practice your punches without tripping over the furniture. he claimed training here would teach you how to ‘fight in tight quarters’.
he sighed. “your moves are sloppy.”
you groaned, shaking your aching wrists. “i’m trying.”
“that’s not enough when someone’s aiming a gun at your head,” he replied, stepping back and raising hands. “your punches are too weak and your balance is all over the place. reset your stance.”
you rolled your eyes but obeyed, repositioning your feet. it wasn’t the first time you’ve heard those words from him.
hongjoong moved closer, tapping your wrist. “keep your guard up. always.”
you threw another punch, but it barely made his hands move. he lowered them, sighing. “that’s not going to hurt anyone-“
“-i’m doing my best, okay?” you snapped. “i’m not a fast learner.”
his eyes softened for a moment before narrowing again. “that’s not an excuse when your life is on the line.”
you tsked. he was right of course, but that didn’t make it easier to hear.
“again.”
you tried once more, throwing a combination of punches that he blocked with ease. when you attempted a kick, you stumbled, nearly losing your footing.
he caught you instinctively, his hands steadying you.
“watch your balance,” he said automatically, going on a tangent on how training is important and blahblahblah. 
you tried to focus on your surroundings, on the words he was saying, but it was hard to ignore the proximity between you. the smell of his cologne mixed with the faint smell of sweat in the room. his touch wasn’t rough or aggressive like you’d expect - it was gentle.
your eyes drifted to his face, catching the faint scars along his cheekbones and jawline. were those always there? or was this the first time you really noticed?
his brows furrowed, likely in frustration at your lack of response, but the concern in his eyes snapped you back into reality, making you realise that you were staring the whole time.
“i don’t think i’m cut out for this,” the words spilled out before you could stop them.
hongjoong paused, his lips parting slightly - he wasn’t  expecting you to say that. for a moment, he was silent. he then leaned in, his eyes piercing. 
“you don’t get to quit.”
the intensity of his voice made you forget about the aches in your muscles and the sweat dripping down your back. his words weren’t angry - they were commanding. 
“why do you even care?” you whispered, barely audible.
his grip on your arms loosened slightly, his eyes searching yours for what felt like eternity. then out of nowhere, he stepped back, clearing his throat as he avoided your gaze. “take five,” he mumbled, walking to the kitchen.
MONTH 5 - BLOOD, BLOOD AND MORE BLOOD
the office building looked ordinary. if you didn’t know any better, you’d think it was just another corporate HQ. but you knew better.
and so did hongjoong.
you held up the new knife wooyoung gave you, one that wasn’t as pretty as the last. it was finally the day you ambushed your dad, the man that’s been wanting you dead for months.
you looked up to face hongjoong. “i don’t want to see it,” you said suddenly.
he raised an eyebrow. “see what?”
“when you kill him. my dad,” you clarified, your throat tightening. “i’m.. okay with it, but i don’t want to see it.”
his eyes studied you. after a moment, he nodded. “make sure to stay close to me,” he said before turning to the building.
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
the group slipped into the building through the side. hongjoong led the way, gripping his pistol tightly as you stayed close behind him.
“elevators are too risky,” hongjoong looked back at the group. “we’ll take the stairs.”
the group nodded, their weapons drawn as they moved quietly through the halls. the fluorescent lights did nothing to mask the sinister aura that was buried in the walls.
when you reached the stairwell, the sound of footsteps echoing above sent everyone into high alert.
the first shot rang out.
gunfire filled the stairwell. the air was thick with smoke and gunfire. you pressed yourself against the wall, trying to avoid all of the attacks happening around you. you tried to go in to fight but-
-someone grabbed you.
you struggled, twisting out of their grasp. but before you could scream, a hand clamped over your mouth, dragging you away. “stay still.”
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
the stench forced your eyes open - a horrid mix of stale cigar smoke and alcohol. the office was dimly lit and your father crouched infront of you, his face smug as he cornered you.
“you think you’re better than me, don’t you?” he sneered.
you glared at him, your heart pounding. “fuck off.”
a bitter laugh escaped his lips. “you’ve gotten worse since you joined that boy,” he spat. “should i cut off your tongue? unhinge your jaw? or maybe i’ll be basic and shoot you.”
“you’re insane,” your stomach twisted. “it’s hard to believe we’re related, especially with how ugly you are.”
“you-”
before he could finish, you jammed wooyoung’s knife into his other thigh, dragging it down to create a large gash. he let out a guttural scream, stumbling into a desk as blood gushed out of his thigh like a fountain.
you moved quickly, scrambling out of the corner, but two piglets grabbed you before you could get far.
“stupid bitch,” your father hissed, forcing himself up as he took out the knife in his thigh, looking directly at you. “you’re going to regret that.”
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
as hongjoong shot another piglet with his pistol, he looked around the haze, searching for a certain someone. “where’s ‘____’?” he asked.
the group stayed silent.
“shit- we don’t know,” wooyoung said nervously.
hongjoong’s face darkened - and without hesitation, he grabbed a nearby piglet by the collar, slamming him against the wall. “where’s your boss?” he snarled.
the piglet squirmed. “i- i have a family!”
hongjoong’s grip on his collar tightened, his eyes widening scarily. “then bring me to him.”
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘
“your mother should’ve gotten the abortion,” your father said before settling down infront of you, the bloody knife close to your face.
“i’m surprised that a woman like her fucked you,” you breathed out shakily as the blade hit your skin. 
“shut up-“
the door burst open as the knife grazed your skin. hongjoong stepped in, his gun raised. “let go of her,” he ordered.
the piglets hesitated, glancing between your father and hongjoong. your father’s hand didn’t move, a scar forming on your face. 
“you want her that badly?” your father asked mockingly. “you’re becoming soft.”
hongjoong didn’t answer. instead, he moved faster than you thought was possible, shooting the two piglets that held you with ease.
the bodies hit the ground - causing your father to shove you harshly against the wall. pain shot through your body as you heard something crack.
hongjoong froze, his pistol trained on your dad. 
“stay back,” your father warned, hovering the blade near your temple.
hongjoong’s jaw clenched. he dropped his gun slightly, making your father relax.
but then hongjoong lunged.
the fight was brutal, all punches and grunts. you slumped against the wall, your cheek bleeding uncontrollably as every part of your body ached.
after what felt like ages, hongjoong finally gained the upper hand, pinning your dad down as he pointed the gun to his head. but then his eyes landed on yours, wide and terrified - making him freeze.
“shit,” he cursed under his breath, lowering the gun. he turned and rushed to you, pulling you into his arms.
your father tried to crawl away, but hongjoong didn’t let him go far. with you in his embrace, he covered your eyes and ears tightly as the sound of a singular gunshot echoed in the room.
you clung to him, your tears soaking into his shirt. his hand cradled the back of your head, his touch soft. “it’s over,” he whispered as you sobbed.
you shook your head against his chest, the salt in your tears stinging the cut on your cheek. “i almost died.”
“i know,” he said softly. “but i wouldn’t let that happen.”
his words settled over you like a warm blanket. you pulled back slightly, your eyes searching his face. you could feel the heat of his body as he kept you close.
hongjoong shifted, his hands moving to your shoulders as he looked at you carefully. his thumb brushed over your scar, wiping away the trail of blood on your face.
“you’re shaking,” his eyebrows furrowed. “you need to breathe.”
“i’m trying.”
he reached for a nearby chair and pulled it over, guiding you to sit. hongjoong crouched infront of you, your hands trembling in his.
“you’re safe,” his eyes locked onto yours. “i’ve got you.”
something inside you cracked at his words - and tears spilled once more. hongjoong didn’t say anything, but his presence was enough. he stayed crouched infront of you, letting you take all the time you needed.
when you finally looked up, there was something unspoken in his eyes - a mix of guilt and relief that made your heart ache. “...thank you,” you whispered.
his lips parted like he wanted to say something, but the words never came. instead, he nodded slowly, his grip on your hands tightening for a moment before letting go.
at that moment, you leaned forward, closing the small distance between you. your lips brushed against his, just enough to make his entire body stiffen.
for a second, you thought you made a mistake. his hands paused midair and his breathing hitched.
but then, he moved. to you. 
his hands cupped your face gently, pulling you closer into a kiss. it was slow at first, but when you gripped his shirt tightly - the feelings he’d been keeping were let loose.
his lips pressed against yours with urgency. his fingers tangled in your hair, holding you like you might disappear if he let go. 
you responded instinctively. your hands found his neck, his jaw - brushing over them softly in a way that made him groan. “fuck- you’re so pretty.”
the world around you spun in swirls of blood, smoke and cologne, overwhelming you in a way that made you lose your breath.
hongjoong broke away for a moment, panting slightly. his lips curled into a smirk, before he kissed you again, softer this time but no less intense. it was grounding, reassuring and impossibly warm.
when the two of you pulled back, his thumb traced your scar. “this..” he began quietly. “..this isn’t what i expected tonight.”
you let out a soft, shaky laugh. “me neither.”
he pecked your forehead as he stood up, his legs slightly wobbly from the kiss. hongjoong held out a hand, helping you to your feet. “...let’s go home.”
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series taglist - @hanoishere @scuzmunkie @sinfullygay @arusio @midnightrebel1028 @neemaxx @seungminsrighthand @arilevenatz @ateezswonderland @beabatiny @lemirabitur @sunnyhokyu @frzzenfrxg @cylovesmg @txtsoobean @seonghwasslytherin @sundaybossanova @sweetinsaniiity @cybrnaya @choisanchwego @mrskill2
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BONUS SCENE - MINE
the apartment was quiet as you laid on the pull-out couch, staring at the ceiling. sleep wasn’t coming - your mind was too busy replacing the events earlier.
the memory of hongjoong’s arms around you stayed, along with the feeling of his lips on yours. how could a man as dangerous as him bring you such comfort?
a soft knock against the wall broke the silence.
you sat up slowly, seeing hongjoong standing in the hallway. his hair was slightly damp and he wore a loose black hoodie, the sleeves pushed up to his elbows. he hesitated before walking to you, his movements weirdly awkward.
“...you okay?” you asked the nervous man.
he shrugged, trying to play it off as he sat next to you. “i’m fine. you?”
“i’ve been better.”
there was a pause as the two of you stared at each other, the silence heavy. finally, he cleared his throat, shifting uncomfortably.
“i’ve been thinking..” hongjoong trailed off.
“uh-oh.”
“i-it’s not a bad thing-” he said hurriedly. “it’s just that.. tonight made me think about a lot of things.”
you tilted your head, confused.
his voice softened as he continued. “but this isn’t just about tonight. it’s about.. everything. i don’t want you to feel.. unsafe all the time.”
“i don’t,” you said instantly, but you’re not sure how much you believed yourself.
he leaned back slightly, reaching into his hoodie pocket. when his hand reappeared, it was holding a pistol - his pistol.
“take this,” he held it out to you.
you blinked, staring at the weapon. “what? why?”
“because it’s mine,” he replied simply leaving no room for argument. “and now, it’s ours.”
you hesitated, your hand hovering over the gun. “i.. i barely know how to use this.”
“then i’ll teach you.”
you looked up at him, searching his face for answers. “...why are you giving this to me?”
you noticed the way his eyes darted down as you looked at him, his fingers tightening around the pistol as he pushed it to you. 
“because,” hongjoong began quietly. “i trust you.”
your fingers paused before finally closing around the gun. the cold metal felt deadly in your grasp, but the way his eyes lit up made your heart swell.
“you trust me..?” you asked softly, a faint smile on your face. “hongjoong..”
his usual composure faltered as you said his name, a blush dusting his face. he swallowed the lump in his throat, gathering himself. “you’re not just a part of the group,” he said. “you’re more than that. to me.”
your eyebrows shot up, completely stunned. “...i don’t know what to say.”
“say yes.”
you blinked. “yes to what?”
“to being mine,” hongjoong’s hands fidgeted slightly.
your heart raced as you heard his words. a wide smile spread across your face as you realised what he was really asking.
“are you..” you paused. “are you asking me to be your girlfriend?”
his breath got caught in his throat as he nodded. “yeah.”
the man that was the literal leader of an entire gang, was sitting nervous infront of you. it was a funny sight to see, but you brought yourself back to reality, answering his question.
“yes.”
a wave of relief washed over his face as he let out the breath he seemed to be holding. he reached out, his fingers brushing yours briefly as he leaned closer. “wanna sleep in my bed tonight?”
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yerchokito · 2 days ago
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some of this is lowk angsty but it’s for the plot guys don’t hate me :( also my first time writing for geto and nanami, hope I did them well enough :))
fem!reader in nobaras
warnings! — implications of homophobia in nobaras :(( not proofread
yuuji is the type of boyfriend to marry you with a ring-pop, giggling as he gets down on one knee. he ends up convincing you to slow dance with him to the sound of the wind, promising he’ll get a real ring and marry you. just don’t eat the ring-pop, he’ll get sulky if you do :((
megumi is the type of boyfriend to have a picnic with you at night, something to get away from all things jujutsu. eating his many ginger flavoured snacks, maybe a slice of something sweet you’ve brung. cuddles up to you while watching the stars, finally understanding what peace is.
nobara is the type of girlfriend to take night walks with you. gossiping about daily life, laughing at corny jokes. only to stop somewhere secluded, humming as she leans against and finally, for the first time without being ridiculed, kisses you.
satoru is the type of boyfriend to have is infinity down around you, wanting to feel your presence. it’s comforting to him, like a warm wave of love and affection. he drapes himself over you, trying to merge together with you. if he could, he’d blend you two together so you’ll never part :))
suguru is the type of boyfriend to keep something that reminds him of you in his pocket. wanting to always have you with him, being gone days on end—away from you nearly sends him spiralling, so having something similar to you puts him to rest. he wishes you’d become pocket size so he can always keep you with him :))
kento is the type of boyfriend to always bring you flowers every time he visits you at work. they’re always hand picked with meaning, wanting to gift you flowers he thought of with you in mind, often varying in different colours and species. sometimes he dries them for you, hoping you’ll use it for decoration.
choso is the type of boyfriend to sleep naked with you, not in a sexual way. choso just loves the skin-on-skin contact you give, your warm body against his cold one brings him comfort like no other. reminding him that you’re here, alive and real. he tears up, forever grateful for you, and your love.
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buzzcutlip · 2 days ago
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For @tyferbebe who requested "You know you didn't have to get me anything" & Touch starved from my Winter prompts list <3 I changed the sentence a little bit
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Not Monday Carmen Berzatto x Fem!Reader Rated E (oral sex) 2170 words
You have a massive, ginormous crush on your neighbour, Carmen Berzatto. You find him extremely good-looking—even though he might not be the typical hot guy type—and the fact that he’s a successful chef takes things to an even higher level. The fact that he’s been capable of running some of the best restaurants in the world definitely impresses you, and, frankly, turns you on in all sorts of ways.
Hi, are you at home?
Mind if I pop in for a sec?
The two messages from Carmy show up on the screen of your phone, and you simultaneously panic and get excited. You’ve just returned from the Christmas family visit late last night, and now you’re in the middle of unpacking, sorting out dirty laundry, and eating leftovers. The urge to put on at least a bit of makeup and change out of your old sweatpants is strong, but on the other hand, you’re worried that Carmen’s plan might change if you don’t respond immediately.
Sure, come over!
The next second, you hear the door opposite yours open and shut, followed by a quick rap on your entrance door. When you open it, you’re still clutching your phone in one hand.
“Wow, you’re quick,” you blurt out with a laugh. Carmy smiles back, his dimples appearing, and your heart swells. Your eyes quickly roam over his form and face, hoping that he won’t notice your obvious gluttonous interest.
“I’m returning the screwdriver,” Carmen says, handing you the tool he borrowed at the beginning of December.
“Oh, thank you.” This has become a game you two play. Not so innocent on your side, as you would often come up with silly reasons, but hopefully convincing ones, to either visit Carmy or invite him over to your place—to borrow a cup of flour, ask him to change a bulb, or help you move the sofa. On the other hand, Carmen’s been over to yours for small favors like shirt ironing, sewing a button on his chef whites, or suggestions for Natalie’s birthday present.
“Sorry about the mess,” you say quickly, clutching the screwdriver like it’s a precious artifact. “I just got back last night and haven’t really… sorted everything out yet.”
Carmen shrugs, a little smile playing at his lips. “Looks fine to me.” His eyes linger for a moment on the half-open suitcase spilling clothes onto the floor before they return to you. There’s something about the way he looks at you—like he’s caught between being bashful and wanting to stay longer.
“So, uh, how was your trip?” he asks, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans. You know that despite The Bear being closed for the Christmas holidays, Carmen was probably busy coming up with new dishes and similar things. No rest for the wicked.
You’re a little surprised by the question—he doesn’t usually linger after these quick exchanges. “Good. A little chaotic, but that’s family for you.” Carmen knows about your mother and three siblings—each of you with a different father—and how intense she gets.
Carmen chuckles, the sound low and warm, and you wonder if it’s possible to bottle it. You’d play it on repeat whenever you needed cheering up. “I can imagine.”
“Oh—wait! I’ve got something for you,” you suddenly remember and reach into your suitcase to fish out a small package adorned with a green ribbon.
Carmen’s eyes widen, flicking between you and the package as you hand it to him. “It’s Belgian chocolate. Milk with roasted almonds and sea salt,” you quickly explain. “One of my older brother’s father is Belgian. He always sends a lot of chocolates. I think he doesn’t remember how old we are anymore,” you shrug. “This is my favorite.”
Carmen’s face softens as he looks at the package in your hand, and he hesitates for just a moment before taking it. His fingers brush yours, and you don’t miss the way he notices it too—his eyes darting to yours for a fraction of a second.
“You didn’t have to do that,” he says, his voice quieter, almost shy. “It’s nothing,” you reply, brushing it off. “I mean, you’ve helped me out so many times. And besides…” You trail off, shrugging again as you feel a little self-conscious. “I thought you might like it.”
Carmen studies the package for a moment before meeting your eyes again. There’s something so earnest about the way he looks at you, it makes your chest ache in the best way.
“Thanks…Uhm—I didn’t get you anything.”
You wave your hand dismissively, shaking your head as you try to mask the pang of disappointment you feel, even though you honestly hadn’t expected a present from Carmy. “Don’t be silly. It’s not like that.”
Carmen’s shoulders relax slightly, though his brows remain knitted together like he’s still mulling it over. “Still… I feel bad now,” he mutters.
“You really don’t have to,” you insist, a small laugh escaping you. “I mean, unless you wanna give me the New Year’s kiss I didn’t get.”
When you blurt out the last sentence, your eyes widen as you realize what you just said. You quickly laugh again, only this time it sounds a bit forced. “I guess I take that from my mom—finding the right guy who would stick around is not my strength,” you ramble on uncomfortably, trying your best to get out of the situation with as much dignity as possible.
Carmen looks genuinely caught off guard, like he’s not sure if you’re joking or not. You can feel the heat rising in your cheeks, spreading all the way to your ears. “You serious, or…?”
Your heart skips—no, jumps—at his words. The laugh that escapes you now is soft, nervous, and entirely unplanned. “I mean… maybe?” you reply, your voice barely above a whisper.
Carmen’s eyes flicker to yours as he steps just a little closer, the tension between you so thick you can almost touch it. “You tell me,” he says conspiratorially, his voice even softer now.
You don’t even realize you’re holding your breath until he leans in, his movements careful, like he’s giving you all the time in the world to pull away. But you don’t. Instead, you tilt your head, your lips brushing his just barely, soft and tentative.
It’s you who leans back first, afraid of him ending the kiss. Only now do you realize you’re wearing old sweatpants and a stretched-out t-shirt, your face completely makeup-free. Carmen’s seen you at The Bear, when you went there for dinner with a friend—all dressed up in fancy clothes and carefully styled hair. “I’m a mess,” you state, still vibrating from the little kiss.
“You always look pretty,” Carmy says quietly with a small smile, sounding genuine. You want nothing more than to kiss him some more, so you ask: “Was that just a one-time—” but before you have a chance to finish your question, or even your thought, Carmy’s lips are on yours again, and your brain short-circuits.
Your bed is hiding behind an old antique paravent you bought in Boston when you first moved here. The bed itself is large, just how you like it, with a solid wood-carved headboard. That’s where you end up together.
The touch of your tongue against Carm’s is intoxicating; the taste of his kiss is absolutely addictive. You moan into the kiss needily, the sound catching in the back of your throat, and blush furiously at your own reaction.
Despite how much you hate admitting it, it’s been years since you kissed someone like this—since a guy has touched you like Carmen is now. His hands roam up and down your sides under your jumper, squeezing the meat of your thighs, enveloping you heavily, wholly.
Carmy’s solid weight above you is grounding and electrifying all at once. Your hands find their way under his hoodie, fingers brushing against his warm skin, the wiry strength of muscle a reminder of how physical his life is. He lets out a quiet, almost shy groan when your nails graze his back, and you feel the sound in your chest as much as you hear it.
“Is this okay?” he asks between kisses, his voice husky, his breath warm against your neck. The care in his tone makes your stomach flip. “Yes,” you whisper, arching into him.
That seems to give him permission, and his touch grows bolder. He pushes your shirt up, his fingers brushing against the bare skin of your waist, sending shivers up your spine. His lips trail from your mouth to your jaw, to your neck, each kiss deliberate. You’re finding it harder and harder to keep still under his attention, your head tilting restlessly, your teeth sinking into your lip to stifle the embarrassing noises spilling from you.
When Carmen leans away and up, you almost protest. He sits back on his haunches between your spread legs, all flushed cheeks and messy hair. He looks adorable and also devastatingly hot. Before you can say anything, he swiftly takes off his t-shirt and jumper in one go, and you finally have the opportunity to admire his bare torso.
The second you want to get up to explore his torso properly with your hands—and maybe your mouth—he stops you.
“Lie back,” Carmy gently nudges you into position, and you obey willingly, watching him curiously.
Carmen’s gaze is heavy, filled with an intensity that sends a fresh wave of heat coursing through you. His chest rises and falls with uneven breaths as he studies you quietly. All you can do is watch as he reaches down for the waist of your sweatpants.
“Can I…” he trails off, leaning down to kiss the sliver of bare skin peeking between the waistband and the jumper. Immediately, you nod, letting him know he has your consent. You even help him push the garment down your legs and off. His calloused fingers are warm, rough in a way that contrasts beautifully with how gently he’s touching you. You feel like you’re about to melt into the bed.
A sudden stillness forces you to open your eyes to check on Carmy. He’s staring down, right between your legs.
“It’s not Monday,” he says, sensing your eyes on him.
“Whaat?”
He touches his thumb to your pelvis bone. “Here. It says ‘Monday.’”
Confused, you look down. It takes you only about two seconds to understand that he’s referring to the word on your panties, just above a picture of daisies.
“Shut up,” you nudge him with your knee, laughing.
He chuckles low, his breath fanning against your skin as he presses a kiss just below your navel. “I’m just observant,” he murmurs, his lips brushing your skin between words, sending a violent shiver up your spine with the tender contact.
“And for the record, these”—he hooks a finger under the elastic, tugging gently—“are cute as hell.”
Then, instead of taking your underwear off as you expect, he takes your hand in his and pulls it down to your crotch—a silent invitation to touch yourself. You do, feeling your heart in your throat, turned on and shy in equal measures. Carmen watches as you stroke yourself through your panties, hesitantly at first. You’ve been wet since the moment you two started kissing, the damp patch on the pale blue fabric drawing Carmy’s eyes.
He lowers himself, planting open-mouthed kisses on your inner thighs and moving higher, closer to your core. He kisses your hand too, mouthing at it with his tongue as if it were your mouth—or your pussy. You can’t believe something so innocent can feel so sexual, and you let out a stream of soft moans. With every passing second, you’re closer and closer to voicing out loud that it’s time for the main act.
Carmen seems to sense it—your need, your desperation. His gaze flickers up to your face, heavy-lidded, and he murmurs, “Don’t rush. Let me take care of you.” His voice is a low rasp, full of tenderness and heat.
The way he’s looking at you sends another ripple of arousal straight through you, and your breath catches when he pulls the soaked crotch of your panties aside, kissing your pussy for the first time.
“Fuck. Carmy,” you whisper, your voice shaky.
He hums against you, not letting up, giving you a hard lick—one that ends right at your sensitive clit. Your hands find his hair, threading through the soft strands as his lips and tongue explore you. You can feel his breath against your skin, the way it hitches every time you squirm or let out a sound. All the sensations are new, overwhelming, and intense in the best possible way.
Carmen doesn’t stop, doesn’t hesitate. His mouth is warm, deliberate, and unrelenting. The rough drag of his tongue paired with the softness of his lips makes your head spin. Each stroke feels like he’s memorizing you, mapping out what makes you gasp and moan with the precision of someone determined to get it right.
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moutainrusing · 3 days ago
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hear me out
691 words, jegulus, platonic prongsfoot
They’d decided to have a ‘hear me out’ cake in the dormitory.
James remembered how it started – as per usual, he was awoken to Sirius waving something in his face. This time it had been a phone screen, open on a bunch of random videos about people putting their most out-of-pocket crushes on cakes and revealing them to the horrified faces of their friends, who turned out to either have a crush on the exact same person, or a crush on someone (or something) worse.
“We’ve got to do this,” Sirius had pleaded.
James had patted his head affectionately, “Mate, you don’t need to ask for my permission.”
Things had spiralled from there, as they often did when they were left up to Sirius. He’d assembled all four Marauders and arranged for them to have printed out or drawn all the pictures of their most embarrassing or unflattering or disturbing or secret crushes, while he’d get a cake from the Kitchens in time for their… ‘hear me out’ thing… at night. Was it a party? A celebration? James didn’t know.
He did know what face he was putting on the cake.
Remus stifled an unbecoming snort when he saw it. Peter wrinkled his nose and prepared for the worst.
Sirius was blissfully ignorant for at least ten seconds before he suddenly clocked it and began squawking, “That’s my brother! Oh my— You want to shag my brother?!” he whipped around to face James incredulously, then got to his feet and began shaking James’s shoulders, “Answer the question!”
And James poked his tongue in his cheek, reluctantly smiling at Sirius with his gums, “Uh… Surprise?”
Sirius scoffed, “I can’t believe this. Keep it to yourself. Don’t get involved with—”
“We’re dating,” James’s brain decided that was the moment to confess. It was a good moment.
“You what?!” Sirius roared. “But that’s my brother! Regulus?! You— what— this isn’t cool, man. Can’t believe neither of you told me. I’m eating your slice of cake now. And tell Regulus he must offer me full custody of Leonie or our brotherhood is through.”
“Leonie?” James questioned.
Sirius huffed, “You don’t even know the first thing about Regulus. Leonie is our stuffed toy lioness,” he turned his nose to the ceiling. “And now she will be mine, ‘cause you’re both traitors.”
In the background, Remus and Peter laughed (traitors) while James tried to placate his best friend.
“You can have Leonie, Sirius—”
“That’s not enough! Firstly, are you even being safe with him? Is he being safe with you?! AND ARE YOU SHAGGING LIKE DISGUSTING CORRUPTED HEATHENS?!”
“We’re safe, and we’re not shagging—”
“Am I the first to know, or have you kept this filthy secret from me specifically?!”
“Sirius, right now is the first time I’ve told anyone, and I told you, Remus, and Peter—”
Sirius gasped, “Did you have Reggie’s permission to tell us?!”
“I’d never do anything without Reg’s permission,” James said seriously.
Extending his pinky, Sirius narrowed his eyes. “Promise?”
“Promise,” James assured him, linking their fingers.
Sirius sighed. “Fine. Have him on your stupid hear me out. But I’m still eating your slice. And after I do, we’re finding him and having a conversation like adults do.”
- - -
“Regulus!”
“Sirius.”
Regulus crossed his arms while Sirius looked at his brother carefully, before nodding wisely, “I’m glad.”
Despite the roll of his eyes, Regulus was smiling, “Thanks.”
James was very confused about the whole interaction.
Then Regulus went back into his dormitory, but Sirius was still standing outside. After a minute of just dawdling, a stuffed toy lioness flew out of Regulus’s door and landed in Sirius’s arms.
Beaming, Sirius cradled Leonie to his chest and told James, “We can go back now, or you can stay with Reg. His dorm’s empty,” Sirius tilted his head towards it.
“How do you know—?” James was cut off by Regulus pulling him into the, as Sirius had correctly predicted, empty dormitory.
“Hi,” Regulus greeted, wrapping his arms around James’s neck and pulling him down into a kiss. “Thanks for telling them,” he mumbled.
“I wanna tell the whole world I love you,” James whispered back.
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thetomorrowshow · 2 days ago
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love is such a drag
Chapter one: Scar's first encounter with the angel (and Grian gets to eat ice cream)
welcome to my scariana griande drag college au. this will be quite the ride from start to finish.
~
Scar spots her from across the bar.
It would be hard not to notice her, honestly. Despite the dim, almost cloudy lighting of the room, she glows, as if a heavenly spotlight is set right on her to make it clear that she just descended from heaven.
Scar sneaks glances at her over the fun green umbrella in his drink. She's sitting by herself—an absolute crime, if you ask Scar—, swishing around the little black straw in her drink. Her dark blond hair falls in gorgeous ringlets down around her shoulders, outlining her face the way a pure golden frame would surround only the most beautiful of paintings.
Her nose is small, turned up just a little bit in a peak, the bridge delicate and sparkling with a small amount of angel dust that must be left over from the aforementioned descent. Her eyes are almost comically doe-like, large and accentuated with soft pink eye shadow and long eyelashes. Scar can't quite tell what color her eyes are from this distance (brown, maybe? Black?), but he knows that whatever color they are, they are absolutely perfect.
Her lips are pink to match her eye shadow, glittery, small and pursed, as if her drink isn't near good enough to pass those delicately soft lips.
Scar hasn't even met the woman, but he wants to kiss those lips. He wants some of that angel dust to find its way onto his own lips.
Her cheeks are rosy and full, and her round chin rests on her palm as she casts a bored look around the bar.
Scar downs the last bit of his drink for courage.
He sticks the umbrella in his shirt pocket for good luck.
Then he picks up his cane and saunters over, frantically sorting through every pick-up line in his repertoire—though none of them seem to match the beauty of God's creation before him.
She looks up at him as he approaches, peering at him from under those long lashes, and now he can tell—
Her eyes are grey, but not grey like clouds, or the sea, or the bartop that her arm rests on. Her eyes are grey like the comforter on his mom's bed, like the bricks around the fireplace back in his grandpa's old house, like the silver colored pencil he'd taken all his notes in for a semester to try and prove to Cub that it worked just as well as a normal pencil (it hadn't).
Her eyes are grey like the backdrop of Scar's dreams, the firmament that rests between consciousness and all else.
And then, of course, he's right there.
And she's waiting.
There isn't a single smooth pick-up line in his brain, which is offensive if Scar does say so himself, because he always has words. He could wax poetic about a frying pan for an hour just to annoy someone, but now that his skills are put to the test he can't hold on to his wits long enough to use them.
Goodness gracious, but she's beautiful.
She's wearing something pink and small, a cut-off that reveals a slender torso and adorable bellybutton, the sleeves long and flowy but off the shoulders. Her skirt is a lighter shade of pink, cutting off just above her knees, and it looks like just the kind of skirt that she could spin in and it would twirl along perfectly with her, the kind that sort of looks like a cupcake wrapper.
Scar's always wanted to wear that kind of skirt.
How long has he been staring at her?
"Hi," he manages, readjusting his sweaty grip on his cane. "Um. Come here often?"
She rolls her eyes.
It's breathtaking.
"Sorry, worst line in the book and all that," Scar excuses himself. "Can I order you another drink, then?"
She glances at the half-full drink she's been slowly working her way through. "I'm good, thanks," she says, and Scar nearly swoons.
The angel talked to him!
And her voice! Fluttery, but something deeper underneath! Textured like a symphonic piece of music, as soft as the faux fur carpets in the back of department stores!
She's perfect.
"I'll just cut straight to the point," Scar says, trying valiantly to not feel light-headed. "You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. May I take you out on a date?"
She blinks.
"You don't even know me," she says, leaning back down to take a dainty little sip out of the straw.
"No, but I want to," Scar reasons. "Can I get you anything? Some chips? A little umbrella?"
"The umbrellas come with the cocktails," she scoffs. She flicks her hair over her shoulder and Scar definitely doesn't almost fall over. "I'm not in the mood for a cocktail."
Scar leans forward. "You can ask for an umbrella with any drink," he whispers, winking conspiratorially. "I always do."
"What is it you really want?" she says, sounding almost tired, and Scar puts his hand to his heart.
"I just want to take you out on a date, I swear, nothing else," he says. "Scout's honor."
"Scout's honor?"
"Troupe 2906," Scar says, lying through his teeth. He was never a scout. Well, he did Cub Scouts, but he never made it to Boy Scouts. And he definitely didn't have a troupe. "Once a scout, always a scout."
Almost reluctantly, she giggles (a sound like windchimes softly jangling), then pulls her phone out of the tiny white purse at her side. "All right, fine. What's your name?"
"Scar," he tells her, pulling out his own phone. He unlocks it with a quick swipe, then pulls up a new contact card and trades his phone for the angel's.
"Your phone looks like it got ran over," she observes, picking at the tape on the side.
"If you pull that tape off, it goes dead."
She stops picking at it.
Scar types in his number slowly with one finger, leaning against the bar as casually as he can manage. He's been standing for a minute too long, but he doesn't want to make her uncomfortable by sitting down.
When he's finished, he passes the phone back to her, receiving his own in return.
"I'll text you," he promises.
She laughs again, nods. "Okay."
The way she dismisses him—
The conversation is clearly over, based on the way she turns back to her drink, her lips once again pursed but this time turned up at the corners.
Scar hurries out as fast as his body will allow him, which isn't very fast even on the best days.
Once he's outside, out of view of her, he checks his phone.
The contact is there, ten exquisite digits.
And her name.
Ariana.
-
"Cub, do you mind if I have someone over? I need to opine."
Cub looks up from his laptop, then flinches away when Scar turns on the lights.
"Scar, do you know what time it is?" he gripes, putting a pillow over his face.
"It's not even midnight, mister, so don't pretend like this is late. You're always up at all hours of the morning, anyway."
"Why can't you opine to me?" Cub sighs.
"You don't opine back! I need someone who will wallow on the floor with me."
Scar can practically hear Cub raise an eyebrow. "Ren?"
Scar grins. "Ren. He basically isn't even a guest, since he lives right above us. And it would only be for an hour at most!"
"Fine, fine," grumbles Cub, sitting up and setting his pillow to the side. "Call him. But I have a quiz tomorrow, so this better be quick."
Ren's over within five minutes, a two-liter of diet pepsi in one hand and a bag of candy in the other.
"Leftover Christmas candy, my dude," Ren says, tossing it on the floor. "You said you need to opine?"
Scar carefully lowers himself to sit on the floor, then flops down onto his back, his arms splayed out dramatically.
"Why are we doing this in my room?" groans Cub.
"I've seen an angel," Scar declares, and his heart flutters just the slightest bit.
"Ugh."
"Ooh!" Ren says, sitting cross-legged on the floor. "Tell me more."
"I was at the bar in Aquetown, right?" Scar starts, adjusting his arms to look more dramatic, one thrown over his forehead. "The good one. The quiet one."
"Right," nods Ren. "I know it well."
"And there she was," Scar says reverently. "The angel."
"What was her name? What happened? What did she—"
"Her name is Ariana," Scar breathes, the name as sweet on his lips as he knows her kiss would be. "She's perfect."
"Did you get her number?" Cub asks boredly.
Scar scoffs. "Of course I got her number! We're going on a date."
"Oooo!" Ren teases, slapping his shoulder. "My man has a date with a pretty girl!"
"She isn't just a girl," Scar says dreamily. "She's an angel. You should've seen her, Ren! If God himself turned up and told me that there had been a mistake, that she was supposed to be in heaven, I wouldn't have even blinked! She—"
"Yeah, she's a beautiful angel, we get it," interrupts Cub. "Can you do this in the living room?"
"What color are her eyes?" Ren asks.
"Grey . . . I've never met anyone with grey eyes. Not like those."
"What did she say? Is she into you?" Ren shakes his head. "What am I saying? Of course she's into you! Who wouldn't be?"
Scar. . . .
Scar hadn't even thought about that.
He'd just been so preoccupied with getting a date with such a perfect woman, he hadn't even thought about whether or not she might want one with him.
What if she secretly hates him?
What if she just told him yes to get him to go away?
"No, it's okay," Ren says quickly, patting his arm. "Don't cry! She's totally into you, dude! Don't even worry about it!"
"What if she isn't?" Scar asks, the hand thrown over his head moving to tug at his hair. "What if I was bothering her? What if she gave me a fake number?"
"No, dude, it's not—"
"Scar," Cub says, kneeling down on the floor beside him, "look at me."
There are already tears welling up in Scar's eyes when he looks up, straight into Cub's dark, unyielding eyes.
"Any woman would be lucky to have you," he says seriously. "If she was lying, that's her loss. Got it?"
Reluctantly, Scar nods, wiping away a tear with the heel of his palm.
Cub claps him on the shoulder. "Now get out of my room."
-
"Mumbo! Mumbo, you're never gonna guess—"
"In here!" Mumbo calls from their shared bedroom.
Grian shuts the front door and locks the deadbolt, then dashes down the short hall—past Pearl's empty bedroom—until he arrives at his own room. He shuts and locks that door behind himself as well, then leans against it, hands splayed on the old poorly-painted wood.
"Mumbo," he breathes. "Mumbo, it happened."
Mumbo is lying on his stomach on the floor, sleep shirt riding just a bit up his back from clear readjustments of position. He pushes his laptop a bit away, shuts whatever textbook he'd been studying, and rubs his eyes.
"You look cute," Mumbo says when he's done rubbing his eyes, blinking blearily at Grian. "Is that a new skirt?"
Grian stands up straight for a moment, twirls it back and forth. "Yeah, it's one of my new favorites, I think. Do you like it?"
"Looks great," says Mumbo. "Good show tonight?"
"It was fine, but that doesn't matter!" Grian falls back against the door again, letting himself slide all the way to the floor. "Mumbo, it finally happened. A man asked me out."
"No way!" Mumbo cheers, sitting up. "Like, legitimately? He thought—"
"He thought I was a girl and he asked me out!" Grian says. "This is the best day of my life. Nothing can top this."
"After—wait, after the performance? Or before? Because you think he'd know, after the performance, that it was drag, but maybe—"
"Oh, no, no, no," Grian waves him off. "This was at a different bar. I stopped by that one in Aquetown—you know, the dead one?—just on my way back, to try and get a decent drink before heading home. And he just came over to me—Mumbo, he called me the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen."
"Dude!" Mumbo waves his arms around like Kermit the Frog. "I think—I think we need to celebrate! Break out the ice cream, dude, because it's time to throw a party!"
Grian just breathes slowly, chest lifting and falling dramatically. He feels just like a girl in the movies after kissing her date goodbye, only better. More giddy, if that’s possible.
It's getting late, though. He should probably slip out of his heels, take out his hair extensions, wipe off his make-up, take off his boobs, change into pajamas. . . .
Or he could go eat ice cream in their tiny kitchen with Mumbo and animatedly recount every moment of the night.
Which is how Grian finds himself eating ice cream in their tiny kitchen with Mumbo, animatedly recounting every moment of the night.
"He has a cane," Grian remembers suddenly, halfway through telling Mumbo exactly what he'd said for the third time. "It was one of those old-fashioned ones. With the golden handle?"
"Okay, so he's, like, the rich heir of a mansion," Mumbo nods. "You could do a lot worse. Unless he was old—was he old?"
Grian shrugs. "I don't think so. He looked pretty young—he had a scar across his cheek, actually, kind of like—like this—"
He traces along his own cheek, starting from his jawbone, curving up a bit almost to his nose.
Mumbo frowns. "A scar? I think—"
The front door of the apartment opens, and in trudges Pearl, kicking off her muddy boots.
"Pearl!" Grian says excitedly, holding out his scraped-up plastic bowl, a couple of bites of melting ice cream still left. "We're having ice cream to celebrate!"
Pearl drops her blue backpack on the floor of the living room (right beside the front door, the dead carpet there dividing it from the tiled entrance space that leads into the kitchen). She looks first to Grian, then Mumbo, then the carton of vanilla ice cream on the kitchen counter.
"Sounds like a party!" she says, sticking her hands in her hoodie pockets. "You both look nice!"
"Oh! Um, thanks!" Mumbo says, while Grian does a little spin, his skirt lifting in the air (not that Pearl can see, standing on the other side of the counter as she is).
"A man asked me out," Grian tells her. "While he thought I was a woman!"
"Well, of course he did! You make a very pretty girl, Grian."
"Yeah, but you have to say that. You're my sister. He called me the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen."
"Awww," Pearl coos. She comes around the counter, pulls a chipped bowl out of the dishwasher (used to dry dishes, not wash them) along with a spoon, which she uses to load some ice cream into the bowl before sticking a spoonful in her mouth.
"What was his name?" she asks around the ice cream, words muffled.
Grian frowns. "I don't remember. He didn't write it in the contact. That isn't important, though—he asked me out!"
"Are you going to go?"
Grian freezes.
Is he going to. . . ?
"Oh no," he says, dread pooling in the pit of his stomach. "I—I didn't even think about that."
"Think about what?" Mumbo asks, scraping his spoon along the side of his bowl.
"I don't want to go on a date," Grian says. Oh, this is dreadful! "I just liked the attention! What do I do, Mumbo? I gave him my number and everything!"
Pearl scoffs. "You gave him your number? You're basically required to go on a date with him. If you give a man your real number, it means you're interested."
"Did you tell him you'd go on a date with him?"
Grian cringes. ". . . Maybe?"
"Grian!"
"I can't help it!" Grian defends. "I love flirting, you know that!"
Mumbo covers his face, bowl abandoned on the counter.
"Grian," Pearl bemoans.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. . . ."
"Well, we'd better hope he's a creep!" Mumbo says loudly, face still buried in his hands. "Because then you don't have to feel bad about ditching the date!"
"Was he nice?" asks Pearl.
Grian shrugs helplessly. "I guess? He tried to give me a drink umbrella."
"Oh. So, very drunk."
"No, I think he just wanted me to have one."
"Goodness, Grian. You've got yourself in a bit of a situation," Mumbo says, finally emerging from his hands. He looks into his bowl, frowns at the lack of ice cream.
"Maybe he'll forget about it?" Grian suggests, but his heart isn't really in it.
He doesn't have much hope. Not with the way the man had talked to him. No, he's probably just set himself up for a month of progressively creepier and more disgusting texts until he blocks the man and files a 'do not contact' directive with the school.
Assuming this man is a student.
What if he's, like, an old man? 
Like, thirty?
Okay. This is too much.
Hopefully, he just doesn't text. Then Grian won't have to worry about it. Which won't happen, but he can dream.
"We can talk more about it tomorrow, all right?" Mumbo says, tossing his bowl in the sink. "It's getting late. And G, you should probably put your, er, appendages away."
"My bosom?" Grian says, raising an eyebrow.
"His tittie-tatties?" Pearl suggests.
"My breastily breasting boobs?"
"His badonka donk—"
"Please just get them off the counter."
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holylulusworld · 2 days ago
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Mr. Dickbeard & Bimbo
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Summary: Your boss’s best friend is the worst.
Pairing: Lloyd Hansen x fem!Reader
Warnings: Lloyd being Lloyd, bimbo reader, groping, implied smut
Catch up here: Mr. Dickbeard
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Lloyd is furious. He can’t believe that he is considering buying the bimbo at his friend’s office a diamond ring. “You fucker always get me in trouble.” He tells his dick as he looks around the jewelry store.
“Sir, how can I help you?” The clerk asks. She flashes him her best fake smile while looking Lloyd up and down. His outfit, neatly styled mustache, and hair scream wealth, and she hopes for a promotion at her next sale.
“I’m looking for a –” Lloyd huffs. He squares his jaw and is about to leave the store. Unfortunately, he thought about your cunt wrapped around his dick and your lips around his dick for a second. “Fuck…I need a ring!”
“A ring,” she clears her throat. “Of course, Sir.” She coos when Lloyd looks at the engagement rings. “Oh, you want an engagement ring!”
“What? No! I won’t marry that bimbo!” He huffs and glares at the poor clerk. She’s on the receiving end of his frustration today. “I need a ring that impresses her. Gold, diamonds, whatever makes her drop her panties.”
Lloyd furrows his brows when the clerk purses her lips. “A sex ring, then,” she accuses before showing Lloyd the first rings. “This one is rather impressive. Most men coming here to impress their mistresses buy this model.”
He huffs and shakes his head. “I don’t want a ring grandpa buys for his young mistress. I want a unique piece no one else has. Something special that makes her pussy all tingly.”
“Certainly Sir,” she says with a fake smile but wrinkles her nose. “Let me get the unique pieces for you.”
“I want an engraving.”
“What do you want the engraving to say?” She dares to ask, already fearing the worst. Lloyd made an awful first impression.
“Property of Lloyd Hansen and his dick,” Lloyd smirks darkly at her pained expression. “I need the ring today. So, chop-chop little lamb and show me the most expensive panty killer…”
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“I’m not going to fall for that trick again,” a huff and a pout are all Lloyd gets as he stands in front of your apartment. “I told you, if you like what you taste, put a ring on that finger.”
You wiggle your fingers in front of his face.
“Bimbo, don’t tempt me to slap that ass raw again.” He cocks a brow, waiting for your response.
“I got better things to do than wasting my time on your mustache. You’re not even that good at eating pussy.” You’re about to turn around when Lloyd roughly grabs your wrist and forces you to stay.
“You’ll not be going to slam that fucking door in my face again, bimbo!” He growls while fishing a black velveteen box out of his pocket. Lloyd opens the box, revealing a beautiful diamond ring.
You gasp as he takes the ring out of the box, holding it in front of your eyes.
“I just spent one hundred thousand bucks on a ring for you. It’s a unique piece, and I cannot return it.”
“I bet it’s fake,” you snap at him, and wiggle in his grip.
“I can cut your face with it to prove it’s a real diamond,” he leans closer to purr his favorite pet name in your ear. “You’ll read the engraving, put it on, and stop making a fuss.”
You take the ring out of his hand to read the engraving. “Property of Lloyd Hansen and his dick.” You roll your eyes. “That’s not nice!”
“It’s the truth,” he growls now. “Put it on, and then I’ll put something big and hard inside your wet little cunt. I know you’re leaking for me already. Diamonds make your bimbo-brain go all fuzzy.”
You giggle and take the ring to put it on your middle finger. Showing it to Lloyd. “There you go.”
“Bimbo!” He huffs as you wiggle out of his grip. “Put it on the right finger.”
“You’ll not get any until you stop calling me bimbo,” you snap at Lloyd. He groans as the pounding in his head returns. “I’m waiting, Hansen.” Lloyd would just turn around and go if his cock wasn't strained against his pants once again.
“Fucking bimbo,” he growls and pushes you against the wall to push his hand between your legs. “You’re my bimbo. My brainless little bird chirping nonsense all day. Now let me eat that cunt before I stuff your mouth with something better than food.”
You wrap your arms around his neck and jump into his arms to grind against his erection. “I hope your mustache is ready for another round. I’m going to ride it off your face today.”
“Go ahead, bimbo. I cannot wait to see you try…”
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Tags in reblog.
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lacucarachapisser · 1 day ago
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successfully failed colin zabel x f!reader
warning : husband! colin, pregnancy announcement, silly arguments, cringe-fluff, tooth-rooting, bullying as flirting, reader being mean and so is colin prolly ooc lol and lil bit hurt-comfort.
a/n : another fluff because why not, this man is so cute and i want to spoil him. im sorry this was rushed and cliché and apologies for my broken english and any grammatical errors. 1.4k wc.
it was because of your period tracker apps says you’re late, you ended up biting your t-shirt end, struggling in the bathroom alone to see what the second test pack is gonna tell. yes, the second. you still could not believe the two strips had appeared on the first you have held on your other hand. blame the trust issues you could never overcome along with some sort of dread overwhelming anticipation that rudely kicking in. but here you are alone, accompanied by your own half naked reflection in the mirror. a slight smile occur on your lips, you held the two test packs as it was a big evidence you’d need to shown to your man. your always busy man.
colin, i’m pregnant.
it wont be an easy way to tell, as a matter of factly. gosh, you really want to surprise him with that news, but you have a situation within these past two days. the problem began when you’re craving in the middle of the night but since colin had not home yet, you texted him to get you something from your favorite japanese restaurant, but he was being careless, didn’t checked his phone so he went home with an empty hand, and those stupid thing led into a silly arguments.
“where’s my oyako-don?”
“your oya-what?”
it’s almost 10pm that night and clearly he looked so tired and absolutely exhausted, but you didn’t like how colin use his tone. you have waited him in the company of growling stomach and hoping you can enjoy ayako-don with your love one. instead, you had to swallow his irksome attitude.
“sorry, got no time to check the phone. if you’re hungry, you can eat something from the fridge. i’m tired, i need to sleep,”
“and if you’re sleepy you can always use the couch.”
defense. you can be much more annoying. of course he gets annoyed, and as much with his dismay at that time, he glared with a deep inhales and strong exhales came out from his nose.
“seriously,”
“well, i’m just saying.” you shrugged and pretended didn’t care.
he didn’t say anything as he quickly picked up the quilt you had spread on the top of the couch. he was too tired to make the conversation on. you left him, headed to the bedroom and deliberately slam the door hard so he can hear it.
and that morning, after you found out that you’re pregnant, you realize that you have to talk things out and fix your oyako-don situation. it’s colin’s day off, he probably still asleep and the thought of him still curled up in the couch while you announce the news and give him the evidence make you feel giddy.
you didn’t think much as you put your pants on, hide the test packs on your pocket, wash your hand and walk out from the bathroom to approach your man.
and there he is, curled up at the couch in front of the TV, hugging the quilt like a little kid. you admire him from afar and the stupid fight scene from yesterday suddenly come to your head. you have no idea why you can be so dramatic and moody? and not to mention —the feeling of a slight hatred while seeing his face was also there. no, you could never hate him that’s for sure. was this all happen because of the bean inside you? damn right hormones.
after some considerable thought, you ended up choose to wake him with the coffee scent. you carry those two cute mugs so that you can make him open his eyes from the smell of the coffee you have made. but before you could come closer at him, one of the mug slipped from your hand and scattered around the floor. and that’s how he woke up. never the plan. you cursed to yourself as you pick up all the pieces.
he gets up from the couch and walk towards you. you can feel it from the corner of your eyes when he gets closer to your presence. he squats in front of you when your eyes still searching the little pieces all over the floor.
“that’s your favorite mug,”
“careful,”
you didn’t mean to let your voice came out that harsh but your mouth is a beast. sometimes she acts without your consent.
“cranky,” he comments. your mood is okay when he’s quiets, but when he started saying something, you can’t help but feel lightly annoyed.
“and again someone’s gonna force me drive 3 hours straight just to get to the specific antique shop.”
you glared at him, hoping that he would shush but he scoffs and pretty sure enjoy the teasing very much.
“i can drive myself.”
“not a chance. you probably back with just one side mirror.”
you quickly get up and he follows you.
“you think you’re so funny?”
“uh-huh,” his hostile attitude emerges, you couldn’t quite withstand the tears that seems ready to spill any time.
“what’s wrong with you?” you snapped and you clearly could feel the heat of anger start creeping through your pores.
“what’s wrong with you.” yeah what is wrong with you? it’s all practically a joke. blame the hormones!
his demeanor looks amused and triumph by your reaction, he totally thinks he’s winning.
“this….” you aim the mess you have made on the floor. “i… i was planning on being nice today because i have something to tell you and i wanted to fix whatever happen between us,” you suddenly get very emotional and sentimental, you don’t even know how you should feel anyway, anger and sad taking over the happiness you have had earlier.
you pull out the two test packs from your pocket and burst in tears.
“i-i was going to surprise you..” you mumble, holding up your voice so that it wouldn’t sound too pathetic.
colin slowly takes the test packs and stare at it. he certainly feel bad to tease you in a very sunny day particularly his day off. he supposed to spend time with you doing something fun rather than arguing silly thing. however, he pulls you in his embrace as you start sobbing. see now, you’re winning.
“oh shit.. shit.. baby,” he grasps your body tight, burying your face to his chest, hand instinctively moved to the small of your back brushing it up and down. he squeezes your shoulder dearly, murmuring your name and sorry, shushing you hoping that it could stop the cries as he still stared at the test packs he held on one hand.
“look at me,” he whispered and it makes you sobbed a little harder. “come on, look at me..”
you managed to look up to see his face with tears still gather on the corner of your each eyes. he starts kissing your eyelids alternately. “oh my sweet girl, carrying my child. i’m sorry sweetie,”
an affectionate proud smile come across his lips, his hands cupping your face and the thumbs softly swipe your tears away. he gently pulling you close as his lips brushed against yours in a sweet lingering kiss. a warm presence that sent sparks of electricity flying through you, feeling loved, a heartfelt moment you needed the most.
“i am a terrible husband,”
that’s not true of course. you don’t have the energy to say something so you just shake your head slowly.
“how about we restart. lets make your plan come smooth, like i know nothing and we can create a proper memory. what do you think?”
you exhale and press your lips together. “well..”
“hm? what do you want to tell me baby?” he started his acting and it actually sounds pretty hilarious.
“i-i’m pregnant,”
he picks your body up until you can not touch the floor, spinning and twirling you around happily. your arms instinctively wrapped around his neck, putting all your strength in there. his hand against your waist feel ticklish and you can’t help but giggle. “colin! there still might be piece of break somewhere here,”
but instead responding at your warning, he fondly kisses you. “i can’t believe i’m gonna be a dad. and you’d be absolute great mom.” and he kisses you one more time. gosh you are so full of love, a simple soft smile smearing your face.
“better?”
“m-hm,”
“still i like you being cranky. the c in cranky stands for cute.”
so you fulfill. what he say goes. you pull his ear and pinch it as a punishment.
“aw.. okay.. okay. sorry.”
you could have simply let it go, but it is the right time to get revenge after all his teasing.
“please,” he mutters plea. finally.
“oyako-don.”
“granted!”
this time, you put a hard kiss on his cheeks. and only then do you realize you have the absolute bestest husband.
-
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-
another notes : thank you so very much for reading, every like reblog and comment are appreciate i can not thank you enough for that. those act itself could makes me alive and motivated so that i can write more for you, for me, for us. ((your comment and reblog actually could pay my bills im not even joking)). love yall sm.
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hot-mess-choices · 2 days ago
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Davrin: So, how do the Shadow Dragons operate exactly?
Rook: What do you mean?
Davrin: Who are their leaders? Who decides what jobs you take?
Rook: Hm… doesn’t work like that.
Davrin: Then how?
Rook: We help the people who need our help.
Davrin: But how do they contact you? What do you… ugh, you know what, forget about it.
~~~
Bellara: What’s it like living in Minrathous? It must be exciting to be in a city with that much magic all the time.
Rook: If you’re a wealthy mage, sure, as an elf born into slavery, not so much.
Bellara: Mythal'enaste, I am so sor-
Rook: I’m messing with you. Minrathous is pretty great. You know, if you don’t think too hard about the corruption and the blood magic.
Bellara: … are you still joking.
Rook: Eh, mostly.
~~~
Neve: So, how do you know Ashur?
Rook: Oh we go way back, freed me when I was a slave, noticed I was good with a knife, did the whole mentor thing.
Neve: Really? The Viper going soft on a little elven girl?
Rook: Oh he never went soft on me, he just reluctantly accepted that he was stuck with me. Says I have that charm where I grow on people like a cyst.
Neve: That does sound a lot more like him.
~~~
Lucanis: Rook, about the spices you asked for…
Rook: The peppers? What about them?
Lucanis: Are you sure they are safe to eat? When I asked Viago to look for them at the market he said that he usually only buys them for one of his poisons.
Rook: Huh, I thought they were just an acquired taste…
Lucanis: Mierda…
~~~
Harding: My mom sent you her regards in her last letter.
Rook: Aww, thanks, how’s she doing.
Harding: You know her, always an optimist.
Rook: We need more of those. And more of her cookies. And I have a bunch of clothes that need mending when we visit her again.
Harding: Hey, is she my mom or yours?
Rook: It’s not my fault. She’s really good at mothering.
~~~
Davrin: So the Shadow Dragons work with some of the Magisters?
Rook: No. Some of the Magisters work with the Shadow Dragons.
Davrin: Isn’t that the same thing?
Rook: It’s not.
Davrin: sigh… I hate Tevinter politics
Rook: Now you’re getting it!
~~~
Rook: Neve, I’ve been thinking, do you run background checks on your clients?
Neve: It would be a pretty big risk not to.
Rook: So when you first worked with the Viper-
Neve: Absolutely not!
Rook: You don’t even know what I was gonna ask!
Neve: I am not giving you dirt on Ashur.
Rook: Spoilsport.
~~~
Emmrich: Rook, without wanting to sound accusatory… did you teach Manfred how to ahem flip the bird?
Rook: … it was an accident
Emmrich: An accident?
Rook: He kept beating me in rock, paper, scissors… I’m sorry
~~~
Taash: I know it’s you.
Rook: Hm?
Taash: You keep giving Assan those extra truffles, I can smell them in your pockets.
Rook: … please don’t tell Davrin?
Taash: Hmm…
Rook: I can put in a good word for you with Harding!
Taash: Hmm…
Rook: And do the dishes for a week?
Taash: Two weeks.
Rook: Deal!
~~~
Rook: I’m sorry about the Stew again, I didn’t think it would end up that spicy.
Emmrich: It’s my own fault really, I should have been suspicious when Taash was the only one eating it.
Rook: And sorry about finishing all the milk earlier that day…
Emmrich: Yes, that was rather unfortunate.
~~~
Rook: Hey Lucanis, any idea why Spite keeps bringing all the forks to my room?
Lucanis: Forks? I don’t-
Spite: Eat fish. Vints like it. Neve does!
Rook: Aw, that’s actually sweet, I think.
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xxplastic-cubexx · 2 months ago
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Mom I threw up
OH MY GOD HELLO TEENY
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jesuistrestriste · 3 months ago
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SAGE SAGE SAGE SAGE
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ARE YOU SEEING THIS
he is EMPLOYED
WHHHHAAAAAATTT ! ! ? ! ? i’m gonna frow up
i was driving all day today w my friend + just got back from a concert abt three hours ago and i missed this???
:( i’m so incredibly happy for him :(( he’s gonna do so well ! YAY MIKE !
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sharoscylla · 2 years ago
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Poppa’s lil pea pod…….. I’m actually just now realizing he does look like a lil pea
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sharkbath · 1 year ago
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1. What did Nandor say to Guillermo’s mom for her to even let him in the house?? Like she has slayer senses too so she must have felt on edge about him from the get go.
2. Whatever he said totally convinced her that he’s his boyfriend cuz why else would she be showing baby pictures 😭😭
3. I too need to see pictures from Guillermo’s gothical phases
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liumangprince · 7 months ago
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little quick tianmoo. my favourite cow boy, I love him dearly ;;;; 💛
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littlemissthunderstorms · 2 years ago
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this concert was the death of me. i’m actually typing this from the grave right now.
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jazzzzzzhands · 1 year ago
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Bowl-sized little man 🥺💖
A lil pen doodle on my lunch break haha. Based on this:
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notsoevilmagistrate · 1 year ago
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I love psychotic pathetic men
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