#I REFUSE TO THINK SHE ISNT A BANSHEE

[screamingwiththewolves]

....wait....sHE'S NOT A BANSHEE??? ALL THIS TIME I THOUGHT HER MOM WAS A BANSHEE, AND SHE WAS A BANSHEE TYPE PHANTOM!??? WHAT??

also...hold up *looks up monster high banshee character*

She was such a background character that i never even knew her name until today XD

I’ve seen people take issue with it but i genuinely love how weird of a character Operetta is conceptually. Shes the Phantom of the Opera character, but they didn’t know the source material so shes just a literal phantom. Her name is a pun on Opera and Operetta. She’s southern because its a pun on opera and opry? So they chose.. Rockabilly music to represent her instead of opera. And i guess they expected the 7-14 year old audience to connect the dots of Opera > Opry > Country > Rockabilly. We see her use voice powers but not the banshee character. And she ourple <3

[sylwanin-was-right]

I wonder if tsaheylu is an equal or disproportionate balance of sensation and information shared between Pandoran creatures.

Its seems like the more cognitively evolved or sapient a species is the more disproportion there is between the tsaheylu, where the former is more assertive and less receptive to the will of the other creature, like how pa'li (direhorses) and ikran (mtn. banshees) are most receptive to Na'vi commands, particularly when there is trust established in form of practice riding and care.

It doesnt seem like the sapience of a species makes a creature more or less "dominant" tho. Cuz we saw how Jake's initial tsaheylu with a pa'li and an ikran were very erratic and unsuccessful.

It could have been that Jake was overwhelmed by all the sensations and the experiences were unique to process unlike anything experiences as a human. Whatever it felt like to bond for the first time for him, it was clearly a lack of cooperation from both parties; that itself—and the implications of Neytiri's brief teachings about tsaheylu—informs that tsaheylu isnt a process of domination but mutual communication, especially that of trust, comfort, and receptivity. Which brings me to wonder if the specific cognitive intelligence (or even other forms of intelligence, like spatial processing, etc) affects the proportion of assertiveness and receptivity between the two that are bonded.

If an ikran doesnt want to be ridden one day, can they refuse tsaheylu or be "foggy" to connect to? If pa'li doesnt like where the rider is taking her, can she comminicate anxiety and pain signals to the rider, making the bond more votalitile? Can any plants that can form tsaheylu possibly reject or "dislike" a connection to it at any point in the bond? What spiritual implications are made or sought out when a tsaheylu is not made or broken (like prayers, rituals, guidence, bad luck, looming disaster)?

We already saw how a poor proportion of cooperation affects the bond negatively in Avatar. The Way or Water seems like there will be an exploration of that disproportionate cooperation but also positively or neutrally in how it affects relationships, like those between the Na'vi and new fauna, like the ilu.

Tsaheylu as a story element represents balance and spiritual harmony. Its also represents cooperation, communication, and to some extent, tension. How do you think tsaheylu's function and role on Pandora will be portrayed in The Way of Water? Do you think more lore about tsaheylu will be revealed (like its limitations, biological functions, evolutionary history, or cultural implications)? Is tsaheylu more like a circle of conmections between a bonded pair or a linear mode of communication from one party toward the other (in other words, do u think the bond is a proportionate or dispropotionate balance between a bonded pair?).

[sendmyresignation]

okay sophia, let's hear YOUR black parade take (bonus tracks included, please ;D)

oh NO!! i don't think I've ever rated black parade i usually Refuse To Rank. but alright. i deserve this:

1. The End. (this is the best mcr song hands down. i am taking no questions. this song was a Revelation)

2. House of Wolves (I'm not positive but i believe this was my first my chem song and it was my most played as a teen. it's just. very noisy and fun, my second favorite mcr song it's Special To Me

3. How I Disappear (YOU WANNA SEE HOW FAR DOWN I CAN SINK LET ME GO....FUCK!!!!!!)

4. Mama (black parade is so good this song is like. top 10 in the world material and it's only number four.... anyway this song is as good as everyone says. banshee screaming AND liza minnelli.... holy shit)

5. Famous Last Words (i got into mcr in middle school so of course this song is high up. what 12 year old hears this and doesn't go batshit? anyway this song has my favorite toro solo)

6. Dead! (songs that give you heart palpitations... anyway amazing solo, cheeky dark lyrics, and some wonderful addition to Gerard's Weird Accents vault)

7. My Way Home Is Through You (i have nothing to say other than this song would make me speed if i could drive)

8. The Sharpest Lives (purely this high because of the lyrics. literal poetry. drop the dagger and lather the blood on your hands romeo.... FUCKS. only reason it's not up further is i think the chorus is repeated maybe One too many times but idk)

9. Kill All Your Friends (while this song doesn't fit on the album- she's still sexy what can i say)

10. I Don't Love You (UNDERRATED GIVE HER MORE LOVE ahem. i don't love you is such a wonderful twisting of a typical 80s ballad. it's the definition of Emoting. gerard's performance on this track is dripping with hurt it's so good. and ray's solo here is so good because it perfectly fits the song and still has an edge. also. one of gerard's best songs live)

11. Sleep (ok amazing song emotional wonderful build it's got it all. the only reason it isnt higher is nitpicking but i wish the ending was a teenie bit either more dramatic or the fade was better)

12. Welcome to the Black Parade (I will preface this by saying this song is NOT overrated, it's an amazing athemic masterpiece that manages to encapsulate the whole album and i love it. that being said. the other songs are just better to me. that's all)

13. Cancer (too sad to really enjoy. like objectively amazing and necessary but it gets booted down the list)

14. Disenchanted (a song i would prefer to talk about than listen to. i love disenchanted for what it represents and how clever it is but I'm never really willing to listen to it outside of the album context)

15. Teenagers (this is so funny. listen, teenagers is the weakest song on the black parade musically HOWEVER it belongs on the album. no ifs ands or buts. i would prefer and album with more narrative cohesion than replace teenagers with a "stronger" song every single day of the week. so my brand is in tact)

16. Heaven Help Us (i am ready to be publicly executed for this one but the instrumental on this track leaves a lot to be desired. there isn't any growth!! a lot of the time i zone out when listening to this track so the lyrics may be fucking amazing- and they are- but they never hit!!! wasted potential)

anyway.... thank u smile 💞

[keydawolf]

Calming the Flames

Chapter 3

Matchoff

Boscha growls through the halls, she had woken up in a bad mood and everyone knew it from her posture, her clenched fists, the way she bared her teety at anyone walking by and the way she walked heavily on each foot, givimg very audible warning that she was approaching. One student however, didnt seem to get the schoolwide memo to leave her alone. Indigo seemed to run into Boscha after almost all their classes and happily waved and tried to speak to her, no matter how many times Boscha growled and told them to "Buzz off" Much to the dimay of anyone who liked Indigo, they kept at it, Luz, Willow, Gus and even Amity had told them they would end up hurt if they kept approaching the fuming witch, yet Indigo just shrugged with a smile. Once lunchtime came around, Indigo noticed Boscha heading for the gymnasium once again, this time they decide to not disturb her, lest she damage the door most, they do howver wait outside the gym. When Boschs did eventually come out, their mood was a little lighter, but upon seeing Indigo sitting there, obviously waiting for them, that mood changed back to anger. "Alright Weirdo, I've had enough of you following me around!" Boscha yells but the reaction she got was not what she'd expect. Rather than suprise, fear or anger, the weirdo simply smiles and stands up then has the audaxity to ask "Why? You seemed lonely to me" "Lonely? As if! I can't stand all you goody goody idiots, even if I was lonely, which I wasnt! Why the heck would I want to hang out with YOU instead?" "Cuz you are lonely, even if you wont admit it, I KNOW you don't hate seeing me around" Boscha felt her thrid eye twitch in irritation, then, an idea comes to mind and a smirk forms on her face. "Alright then, how about this, after school, one v one grudgby match, if I win, you have to leave me alone from now on" Indigo's eara twitch upwards in interest "And if I win?" Boscha snorts "If you win? You can bug me wherever the heck you like! I wont even get mad!" Boscha says, the weirdo may be good at dodging, but there was no way they could beat Boscha at scoring. "Sounds good to me" Indigo says and sticks out a hand to shake on the deal. Boscha looks at the hand in disdain but shakes it anyways, it wasnt a deal if they didnt shake on it after all. "You better not flake out on me" Boscha snarls and walks away. "Wouldnt dream of it" ----‐------------------------------- "You did WHAT?!" Amity almost yells as Indigo sits back down at the table with her news. Willow, Gus and Lux just stared, Before they all started talking at once, which made following all their words difficult. "...make an oath?" "....Can't possinly expect to..." "......Gonna really hurt you...." "....need to think before you...." Indigo's ears twitch downwards ans they frown at the others, which makes them all stop, Indigo wasnt one to frown often, so when they did it caught everyones attention. "I'm doing this" they state and even use their full worded voice to make it clear to everyone before them. The others don't argue, staring at them. "Why are you putting so much effort into Boscha?" Willow asks suddenly, gaining Indigo's attention "All she has ever done is hurt others, mentally and physically, heck she's clearly not opening up to you, why put yourself through all this just for her?" Indigo is silent for a long minute "Because she's stuck in the dark, she doesnt know what the light feels like yet, but she never will if no ones willing to show it to her" Indigo says and to Willow and Gus it just seemed like a metaphore, but Luz and Amity knew exactly what Indigo was reffering to and their eyes met for a moment, a look of slight understanding passed between them. Amity sighs and looks at Indigo. "Boscha is very prideful in her abilities for grudgby, she doesnt take defeat well at all, she WILL try to hurt you if she thinks she will lose to you" Indigo nods "I'll keep that in mind" Willow pipes up as well "Also make sure she doesn't pull the rusty smidge ploy again, make sure it isnt on the field" "Got it"

The line of concersarion continued until the end of lunch, apparently others had heard about this 1v1 match and were planning to come watch and see who won, though apart from a few grudgby fanatics, it was pretty much just Skara and the other grudgby teammates, Luz, Amity, Willow and Gus. Indigo stood on the grudgby field, staring across at Boscha, Indigo had chosen a nice blue uniform, Luz and Amity had done their face paint, red and blue lines down their cheecks from their eyes. Boscha had gone for the normal Banshee design. "You know the rules weirdo?" Boscha asks with a smirk. "Yup, is the rusty smidge on the field?" "Nah, if i'm gonna beat you, I wanna make it a good one" Boscha says with a smirk. Indigo smirks back as they wait for the ball to fly. Luz, Amity, Willow and Gus are cheering for Indigo on the sidelines, as the ball is sent into the air, Indigo had the height advantage and was able to grab the ball first, keeping it however, was harder than it looked. Boscha knew how capable Indigo was at dodging and didnt have any qualms charging full tilt at them for the ball, Indigo had to dodge a lot of attempts, trying for a goal too early just to get Boscha to stop, it misses and bounces off the goalpost, right into Boscha's waiting arms, she tears off to the other side, getting halted by an earth spike trap, which lead to a tackle from Indigo. Bischa had to commend the weirdo for their form on the tackle, but she refused to allow them the ball that easy, struggling out of their arms with a lot of effort and kicking the ball before they reach her again, scoring first. Indigo stands, wiping the dirt off their face, catching their breath. "Nice one" they compliment as Boscha gets back into place. "Hmm, your tackle wasnt too bad at all, but your aim is terrible" "Heh, we'll see" Indigo replies as their hand circles behind their back, unseen by Boscha, a clone of Indigo appeared behind her and as the ball shot up, the clone tackles Boscha before she can jump so Indigo can hop over them with the ball and head for the goal. "Agh, forgot you did Illusions too" Boscha grumbles and elbows the clone hard, it poofs away and she gets to her feet in time to see Indigo toss the ball through the goal with ease. Indigo's group cheers loudly, Gus waves his flags with vigor. Indigo jogs past Boscha to her place, grunning from ear to ear. "Pfft, you look like you just won the whole game, it eas only ONE goal" Boscha says condesendingly but Indigo doesnt falter at her snide comment, simply grinning as they waited for the next ball. "Man, psyching them out is NOT working" Boscha thinks to herself in annoyance. A few more goals on each side and it was all tied up, 5 points to each of them. Boscha glares up at the clock, only time for one more play, someone HAD to get this one. The ball flies and both girls jump, but rather than grab it, Boscha bats it right into Indigo's chest, Indigo couldnt dodge in the air, the shift in intent was too fast for them to even register, they hit the ground with a cough, clutching the ball. Boscha lands and folds her arms, waiting for Indigo to call it quits. "Hey! That cant be legal!" Luz yells. "It's a completely legal and well known play in grudgby" Skara answers from the next aisle "Besides, Boscha gave up control of the ball, if Indigo can get back to their feet, they keep it unless they miss" Amelia adds in. "They're right Luz, its a common play, but most grudgby players know not to leave their middle wide open" Amity adds with a look at the two, who nod in response. "Yeah... its usually for well prscticed captains that the other team want to slow down, but Boscha is risking a lot giving up full control of the ball like that, if Indigo can score, they win, if they cant, its a tie, so the only winner here is Indigo in the end" Amelia replies. Amity thinks it over "Yeah... that... isnt like her, what is Boscha trying to prove?"

Boscha waits as Indigo struggles to their feet, making their way slowly towards the goalpost, she hadnt skimped on that impact, they were quite resiliant, though the hit had very obviously hurt, they were still doing what they could to get the ball close enough to score.

waiting for Indigo to call it

"Hey! That cant be legal!" Luz

"It's a completely legal and well known play in grudgby" Skara answers from the next

"Besides, Boscha gave up control of the ball, if Indigo can get back to their feet, they keep it unless they miss" Amelia adds

"They're right Luz, its a common play, but most grudgby players know not to leave their middle wide open" Amity adds with a look at the two, who nod in

"Yeah... its usually for well prscticed captains that the other team want to slow down, but Boscha is risking a lot giving up full control of the ball like that, if Indigo can score, they win, if they cant, its a tie, so the only winner here is Indigo in the end" Amelia Boscha waits as Indigo struggles to their feet, making their way slowly towards the goalpost, she hadnt skimped on that impact, they were quite resiliant, though the hit had very obviously hurt, they were still doing what they could to get the ball close enough to score.

Indigo got to the goalpost and looked up at it, they had 20 seconds left, in one last ditch effort, they tossed the ball as high as they could, but it wasnt high enough, bouncing off the very bottom of the post and falling back.

One very small vine errupts from the ground, catching the ball and tossing it through the post, just before the timer ticked to zero.

Everyone looked surprised, naturally everyone also looked at Willow, who immediately raised her hands up,.

"Willow didn't cast that, I checked when I saw it" Skara confirms immediately when Bosxha looks their way.

Boscha shrugs and nods "Must have been the court itself then, guess it liked their determination" she says and walks away, no fuss, no screaming or flaming grudgby balls flying everywhere.

Everyone watches in astonishmemt as the three eyed witch leaves in complete calm.

Indigo had fallen back to a sitting position with a grin on their face.

"Thah was.... so much fuuun!" They yell loudly as they try to get on their feet.

Luz was the first over to help them up "You did great!"

Amity walks over soon aftwr with Willow and Gus in tow "I have to admit, if I was still captain I'd definately ask you to join the team, those were some smart plays"

"You did iiiiit!" Gus yells as he runs in circles around Indigo and Luz and waves his little flags eagerly.

"That was weird at the end though right? The court normally stops goals, it doesnt usually score them" Willow says quietly.

"Heh, this one tends to have a mind of its own, I hate to say it but Boscha must be right, it didn't send one obstacle to stop Indigo getting to the goalpost" Amoty observes.

"So wait... what was it you got if you won?" Luz asks curiously.

"Boscha can' geh mad if ah hang around 'er now" Indigo replies matter of fsctly.

"Wait... thats all you wanted?" Willow asks with a raised brow.

"Yeh" Indigo says with a grin."Eh was de opposi'eh oh whah she wan'ed" they explain

"Oh, I kinda doubt she'll keep to that, she was way too calm when she left, normally when Boscha loses... everyone loses... and I dont mean the game" Amity says.

Boscha sighs as she heads to change, noticing her potted plant had poked out of her bag for some sun, it had three little buds growing upwarss now.

"Hmph, is that some cheesy reference to my eyes? Titan damn it Amelia, if this flower matches my hair too I swear" she says and rolls her eyes, zipping her bag up so no one would see the plant.

[thedistantstorm]

Phoenix Protocol 02

A Zavala x Female Guardian work.

Summary: When the Traveler’s Light was returned to the Guardians after the defeat of the Cabal, it did not manifest itself the same in everyone. Miyu, an Awoken Warlock, finds herself struggling with her abilities, her Light feeling different and not her own. With her Vanguard preoccupied with grief and all eyes turned to the Reef, she finds herself turning to an unlikely source in an attempt to rediscover her connection to the Light and define what it means for her as a Dawnblade.

[Previously]

Ikora always wants more.

By research, Ikora actually means to discuss Miyu stopping hers. Focusing on more important matters. The Reef. Uldren. Miyu wants nothing to do with any of it, and that is why she had willingly offered her services detaining escapees from the Prison of Elders despite not actually wanting to do that at all.

It gives Miyu time to actually complete some more secretive research on the side: why her Light is messed up. Why it feels like when she received hers back, after the war, it felt like it belonged to someone else, the person she used to be but wasn’t any more, coiling uneasily beneath her skin. She’s gone to Io. The Shard. Both under the guise of hunting escapees, but also to seek answers.

Neither place does and very day, the solar sword is more difficult to grasp, wings of flame beyond her reach. Telling her Vanguard that didn’t work. Ikora didn’t understand. The Void has always been at her fingertips, for as long as she’s been connected to the Traveler. With that in mind, Miyu attempts to adapt her argument, listens to Ikora insisting that she push herself and hopes that eventually either her own efforts or Ikora’s reasoning pays off.

Ikora still demands an answer, though. Wants Miyu to give her something. So, Miyu presents her personal thoughts. Based on her research, she finds that her connection to the Light is strongest while meditating or calling upon her abilities in the midst of a healing rift. Ikora is not impressed. Miyu isn’t expecting her to be. She tells Ikora the truth - that she does not believe offensive maneuvers are her true calling, not anymore. It’s something she’s believed for a while now. She can hear Ghost cheering her on in her mind for being honest - for expressing her opinion. That was rare. Miyu hated doing so, especially when she knew it was going to be an unpopular one.

Ikora, in response, cites battles, strikes, accolades. Ikora always measures a Warlock’s worth in accolades.

Miyu measures a person - Guardian, Human, Exo, Awoken, whatever - in terms of character. Heart. Sometimes she thinks that’s why she just doesn’t fit in with her more intellectual colleagues, aside from not being sneaky and clever like the Hidden or having half the honors or titles that Ikora’s top-tier Warlocks have. Put a sword in her hands and Miyu can cut down almost anyone or anything. But have her infiltrate a group and act a certain way, play a role of some sort? She’ll fail right away.

She is not an actress. She’s a Guardian. And to her knowledge, the definition of a Guardian is someone who protects. There has to be some merit in that, she’s told Ghost, and he - her best friend and most honest critic - agrees.

Ikora - Miyu thinks - must not think much of her. Still, the Void user pulls her back from her thoughts with praise. “Grey,” She says, “You are so much more than you give yourself credit for. You need to push yourself harder. Do not give up. I know you are better than this.”

It’s times like this that she wonders. Does Ikora know what her name is, really? Does Ikora even care? Miyu is beginning to think she’s just a faceless person, a puzzle that is challenging and therefore worth the more esteemed woman’s time. Ikora gave her hardly any face-time before the war, before she had these issues.

Regardless, the younger Warlock attempts to retain her composure. “Thank you. However, I would like to pursue my research on a more defensive Solar ability,” Miyu says, barely a whisper of defiance. “I believe it is possible.”

Ikora shakes her head. “Leave shielding for the Titans. A Warlock’s rift is not meant to protect. It is meant to heal or empower, and only briefly. Attempting to augment it is a waste of Light better spent on dispatching our enemies.”

Miyu sighs, but nods. “What would you have me do, then?”

The Warlock Vanguard crosses her arms, turns her back to Miyu and looks out at the City. “Take the most difficult Strikes and Patrols I can give you. Challenge yourself and you will find yourself calling upon your abilities more. If that does not help you to realign yourself with your Light,” She trails off, eyes narrowing on a fixed point beyond the horizon, “I will explore other paths. Your research is unnecessary at this time. If you require a project, I will send you to collect information from the Reef.”

The younger Warlock bows. “I understand,” Miyu says, schooling her features into something blank, and trying to sound collected and grateful, not detached and indifferent. “Thank you.”  This won’t help. She’s already tried this, Miyu thinks, but tries not to let it bleed into her demeanor.

“You’re welcome, Grey. You may go.”

Miyu turns her back to Ikora Rey, but waits until she is nearly to Banshee’s stall in the main portion of the Tower to let the frustration show on her face, a very quiet growl escaping her. Ghost appears at her side immediately. “I can’t believe she wouldn’t listen to you,” He says, sounding even more irritated than Miyu is. “I’m sorry,” He apologizes to her. “But I think you should keep working on it.”

“So do I.”

Ghost bobs, spinning around her in a wide circle of disbelief. “You do?”

“Yes.” Silver eyes cant over toward her Ghost’s single teal one. “I’ll do what she asks, and continue my research on my own. What else can I do?”

He sighs. “I know. I just wish it had gone differently.” He taps her cheek. “If you could have convinced her to watch you summon your-”

“We asked that the last two times and she refused. It’s okay, Ghost. I’m used to it being just you and me.” She reaches up to cup his small being with her hands, and holds him close. “Sometimes, I think it’s better that way.”

Ghost nuzzles against her abdomen in a return of their improvised hug, and wonders not for the first time if she considers leaving. He knows she doesn’t feel like she belongs here, that she’s trying so hard to fit into the roles dictated by social norms. Most of her fellow Guardians hurt her with their lack of understanding, their taunts. Most of them do not know how it feels to have their Light feel foreign to them. Still, she remains as gentle as she can, does her best to be kind to everyone she meets. It’s no wonder they don’t live within the confines of the Tower. The City folk are far kinder to his wayward Guardian than her own brothers and sisters. It’s a shame.

-/

Three days later, news hits the Tower. Cayde-6's killer has been eliminated. Almost everyone is celebrating. Miyu uses the general population's distraction to her advantage, slipping out to the training grounds recently restored near the base of the wall. There should be free space for her to experiment unseen, a rarity in the middle of the day.

She discards her gauntlets and lets the heavy, flame-retardant sleeves of her robes hang down over her palms. Pulls her sword from its sheath at her side. Ghost flutters around her, cones spinning silently in anticipation a safe distance away. She drops to her starting position, kicks off.

What she does not have in stealth or strength, she makes up with in skill. Some of it, Ghost believes, may have been written upon her from her first life, muscle memory and reflexes allowing her to pick up swordplay far more easily than ever anticipated. But not all of it. She worked hard to hone her skills, consulted archives and videos, took every ounce of criticism to heart.

He enjoys watching her dance throughout the training arena with her blade slashing out, parrying imaginary blows, each move fluid yet moving with unbelievable discipline and precision. However, he knows it will come soon. Can feel the tingle of Light, the increasing heat. She’s going to try without the rift. She always does, first. When her mind is clear, when she’s reached that place of blank-white concentration.

The Warlock sheaths her physical blade in a motion like lightning, before reaching out for the heat in the air, calling upon the Light in her soul to manifest the sword that answers the call of her heart. It always looks so effortless from afar.

It isn’t, though. He watches her throw the first one, scorching the dirt. Watches her call upon the second. Watches the flames spiral up her arm, paying no heed to her robes. Watches her grit her teeth and give form to the energy in her hand. This one doesn’t go as far, doesn’t track like the first.

The third fizzles into ash, blackens her fingertips. She screams, drops to her knees, slams her fists into the dirt. He doesn’t approach. He knows she wants to feel this, to commit it to memory - as if she hasn’t already, he thinks, but allows it to continue - and use it to fuel her. It’s how Ikora believes she will improve. Miyu doesn’t believe in it, but she tries anyway. He knows she’d try anything, to feel like herself again.

This is torture, but it’s therapeutic. She needs to let it out, to blaze, like the fiery powers locked inside her, refusing to come out the way they’re supposed to. The way they always had, before the Cabal had ripped them away by force.

Any changes in her personality, since the war, have been subtle. He notices the way her swordhand twitches after she lets the blades burn through her nerves. Can tell that where she might say ten words once, she now says six or five. Notices that where she’d try to be social once in a while, it takes a great deal of encouragement to convince her to approach a friendly face.

Ghost’s cones push out and then back in, spiraling around him in surprise as someone appears on his radar. Someone approaching, quickly. At a run. Miyu is pushing herself up, the rush of a healing rift spiraling out from beneath her. She doesn’t notice.

Another attempt is made to call upon the sword. She growls and braces her sword hand - gripping her left wrist with her right hand. Flames spit and spiral up both arms this time, fighting for purchase against the healing properties of the rift.

“Mi- Miyu?”

The small AI turns at the sound of the familiar voice. Oh, no.

Next

[nightskytypes]

I was just as blind as everyone else

But then again “blind” really isnt as much of an accurate description as “skillfully decieved” would be. I heard the same things everyone else did “Rachael cheated on me. Rachael did this. I loved her and she did this to me” But one thing remains the same.

Not one person is told how you cheated on her just as much as she cheated on you. You never, not once, focus on the mistakes YOU make that lead up to the destruction of the relationship. No one knew about phynix, a fake girl you would run back to every time things went south with rachael and you. Not one person knew how you made the very bed you lay in now.

And thats the thing with you. You always will do everything possible to avoid taking responsibility for the way things end up. Its always poor you, look at what they did to you, how could they do this when you loved them so much? Why couldnt they just listen. You always do so much.

But youre just a repeat offender… yourw just a cowardly little kid who refuses to face up to the consequences of his actions.

You have not grown an inch since the day you cheated on her. You have no learned one bit. And that is accuratly displayed in what you did to me.

You lie through your teeth and purposefully avoid revealing the horribly manipulative and harmful actions you are well aware will cause damage to your significant other because it will gain you no sympathy. It will get you no pats on the back. Itll make being told you love with all your heart nothing but an empty lie. Because it’ll revile your half assed selfish nature, that you do not do all you can and have not changed in the slightest since your first relationship.

You cheated on me. You emotionally cheated. Which may be short from what you did to her, but it is an inexcuesable action nontheless. One that is in no way hard to make the choice to, idk, NOT do. And when i developed a voice on it. When i no longer allowed you to walk all over me and take your sweet time to no longer do the things you KNEW hurt me? You made me out to be an irrational bitch. You painted me out to be the one who victimizes themselves and never loved you as much as you loved me (vomit.) how *I* somehow strung YOU along. played with YOUR emotions. lied to YOU about my feelings. you made up scenarios and backed it with Google level psychology like my looking away from you trying to force my face directly in front of yours was some outrageous indication I was lying when I said I love you, and totally not because you know I cannot look someone straight in the eyes when I'm in fucking pain. for someone who refuses and makes up any excuse he can to not see a therapist you sure love to act like one to everyone else.

And its a real joke..cause i did nothing to break your heart. I didn't flirt with other people. I didn't hide dating sites behind your back or purposefully keep images of us off of sites for me to get more attention from people. I treated you well. I checked up on you round the clock, like you wanted, constantly seeing if you were okay despite knowing youd just brush it off and lie to me expecting me to continue to chase you. And I have eye witnesses. I constantly allowed you to fuck me over so you could take your time because “you need repitition to learn” and youre “trying as hard as you can”. Jeez, 2 years into the relationship and i was set on leaving my entirw life, my entire COUNTRY for you. I was willingly putting my life on hold ao your impatient ass could have me there asap. And yet I never did anything for you. I never cared enough. if I loved you I'd do anything, right?

And what do i get for it? My name dragged through the mud. Treated like nothing short of a pile of trash to be tossed out cause i no longer served a good enough purpose to you. You trying to cover up my existance with the next set of nice tits to hit your phone screen.

You play with my heart for a straight year. You fuck me over not once, not twice, but FOUR times all because you can never own up to your actions. You scream and yell and intimidate me into silence, make me fear being hit by you but never seeking help. And then take all the credit for the relationship like you were the one trying to talk things out and make it work. Its hard to talk when youve got an over compensating male shreeking at the top of his lungs like am ugly banshee how much he doent want to hear he is breaking your heart.

But alas. In a month, I will have my GED. I will then be moving on to achieving my dream goal and i will be entering into fighting classes because I will NEVER again allow a man to tell me he loves me and then run up inches away from my face as if they were gearing up to fucking fight me to scare me into silence.

The next man that believs they are big enough to lay a finger on me will recieve the business end of the floor shattering their teeth.

I would of done anything for you. I would of been there through anything had you of just had some fucking loyalty and maybe actually went to get the professional help you have needer since you were a teenager. You meant everything to me, but i was nothing more than a shiny trophy to wear on your arm till you could find the next bigger breasted one.

I will pity the next girl stupid wnough to not see that where there is smoke, there is fire.

Youre a liar. Youre a cheat. Youre a repeat offender. You are selfish and abusive. And you are nothing but a coward.

Karma is a real cunt, my good bitch. And you will find nothing but regret casting out the people who actually wanted you to become the decent human being you could be and not the pathetic troglodyte in human cloathing you are now.

Youre 24. Not 16 anymore. Its time to stop blaming the girls you fuck over for your life being the way it is and look in the mirror. You hide things because you KNOW its wrong.

Cheating is not a mistake. Its not an accident. It is intent. It is never not known how it will turn out. It is not a suprise or secret when it ruins your fucking relationship.

And although I may be the one ranting to tumblr months after, i at least can look my demons in the eyes and grow.

I at least have walked away from this dumpster fire of a relationship with a voice and sense of self worth

While you once again cover your ears and shut your eyes running into your moms arms to have her tell you they arent real. You cant even talk about me without feeling like you need to “carve out your chest” Getting rid of amazing friends all cause they took the time to really find out what was going on. (Your loss man. Theyre great.)

Guilts a hell of a feeling, isnt it my stupid, stupid love? 😙

Its what you get for always thinking with your dick and never your fucking head.

Go flood a desert with your fake ass crocodile tears. It’ll take a worlds worth of work to redeem yourself from the vile web you’ve spun. but you’re just too much of a chicken shit to put the work in for it and actually face the mess you’ve made, So you threw me and anyone else with balls to call you out on your bullshit under the bus. In fight of flight, it’s easier to run away than it is to get the fuck over yourself and actually grow. you can try and make me out to be the one crying victim. make *me* out to be the stubborn one. make me the toxic problem and reason your life was soo stressful but hunny, I ain’t a mirror. and the only one who fits those categories and has for years? Is you and your mistakes you CHOSE to repeat over. and over. knowing it would get you no where but on your ass crying to mommy about how hard it is.