#I ONCE READ A REVIEW OF IT THAT CALLED THE CHARACTER DESIGNS 'BLAND' ????

[kimbapisnotsushi]

can you talk about what you like about From Up On Poppy Hill? /gen

Okay see I understand that this is genuine but also if you're wondering "why tf does this person like a movie that uses 'we found out that we might potentially share the same dad but we won't stop our feelings for each other' as a plot twist" then that is totally understandable it DOES make me seem like a bit of a weirdo I agree with that!!

But I love From Up on Poppy Hill for lots of reasons!! (Warning: this will contain spoilers!!) I admire the type of character Umi is. She's disciplined and hardworking and dedicated and, ugh, the fact that she raises the flags every day??? When it was her dad who taught her how and she kept raising them when he was gone in hopes that it would lead him back home?? And she keeps doing it even though he never will? It makes my heart ache whenever I watch it.

It's also pretty funny, even if in a simple way. I always crack up when they're hosting the student council meeting and a fight breaks out and then the one student runs to tell everyone the principal's coming and everyone's like "OH SHIT" and they IMMEDIATELY unify and start singing. Also when Shiro and Shun are having a serious conversation while they're using the restroom, and when Umi drops Shun back into the water after holding out her hand, and uhhh there's probably some that I'm missing but I can't name any more off the top of my head right now LMAO.

Also the visuals! The music!! It makes for such a beautiful atmosphere for a real-world setting. Let me tell you, listening to the Breakfast Song is a GREAT way to start your day and get in the mood about being productive and feeling good about chores.

And I really, really love how all the students came together to save the clubhouse. Call me a sentimental sap, but I think there's something really great about them working hard to clean it up and give it love and life and turning it into something to be kept, even if a lot of them never used it in the first place.

All in all, I know it might seem like a weird Ghibli movie to like, and it's not like I don't love the other ones either, but I just think From Up on Poppy Hill remains pretty unseen and deserves a lot more love. Thanks for listening, anon!!

[justserahtonin]

Let's talk about Moonvale.

Ok, phew, it's been a while since I used tumblr and needed a new one.

I've been in the Duskwood fandom since pretty early on the game, so I wanted to jump on the thousands of opinions on Moonvale. Now, I'll state first the negative facts but also the good ones. I've seen tons of nasty opportunists trying to throw hate, including other devs.

Also, IMPORTANT, Moonvale is NOT Duskwood, we know. But I'll be referring to Duskwood to point out exactly why the fandom or at least I feel negative about.

First of all, let's go with the bad stuff. I'm not even going to say anything about the diamonds and their price, I just refuse. But what I want to talk is about the minigames and the AI art. AI art is just... oof. I know some people don't mind, but as an illustrator, let me tell you how much it hurt me. This community has always valued artists, I remember I had a blog where I drew other people's MCs and that made me make some cute and valuable friends, I remember how much the fandom loved artists, so seeing this... just hurts. I get the "we want to give your new friends their own spotlight" but Everbyte did that in Duskwood beautifully with stock images, with the gang trying to add us in more activities or chatting with us. You don't need stolen art to give someone a spotlight. Those new to Duskwood may not remember it, but Richy was faceless for a big part of the game until they got an actor for him and no one was mad about it. In fact it gave Richy some kind of shy guy charm.

About the minigames... Look, last time I played Duskwood, I did without any extra moves and those were hard, more or less like Moonvale's. But you know where the real problem is? In how the interrupt the story. And how little immersive they look and feel like when playing them. Let's look back to Duskwood. The minigames had a goal: hack Hannah's phone. Whether it gave us a clue or not, it felt real and, in words on MC in Moonvale "not every lead will take you to a clue". But you put work in there and when something unlocked, it felt good. And if you didn't, you had at least one or two credits and a character praising you for the good work (thanks, Jake). In Moonvale, it feels like "oh, nobody's here, let me play some candy crush". Also, the vibe does not match the tone. In Duskwood, the minigame design felt like you were hacking, you were decoding something. But here it really feels like some Project Makeover game.

NOW, let's get to the good parts. I feel the story might be interesting. Who's Unknown?, how can Charlie help us?, what happened to us and that fame we got in Duskwood? I find Eric quite lovable and Charlie kinda like a big mouthed friend with good heart. Ash is like the mom friend or lil sis friend, worrying but being kinda childish and Violet being the shy one. There's something with the mysterious figure in Eric's call that looks familiar. Was the figure wearing a cap? Am I imagining stuff?? And the last call??? Let's be real, Duskwood had real plot holes and was a bit bland the first episodes but we grew to like it as the story kept going. I see real potential in there and some theories I'd love to share once sometime has passed, but not now.

Why am I saying all this without mentionion UI design, lack of premium choices, message history and so on? Because those are easy fixable things. Those are little changes that can happen over the time, like Richy's gallery in Duskwood or little sponsorships, packs and so on. I think I'm not the only one who wouldn't mind paying up to 10€ for a premium pass, I can save the money. Everbyte heard their fandom before and I really hope they do now. Let's be honest, we are to blame too. Half of us went looking for a "Duskwood 2", but Moonvale is not that. Expectatives can often be harmful to both sides. I really think Everbyte didn't wait for such backlash, so I want to have faith, I want to believe they will read these reviews and stop to think "why was Duskwood so beloved? Let's go to the core".

Have faith in Everbyte and in Moonvale, we still don't know who Adam really is, what people know about us and how is it that two people in danger had our contact. Maybe this story can give us some clues to MC's past. Maybe Adam turn out to be Jake. Who knows, there's a lot of space for plot twists and I'm here for it.

Let's keep the Duskwood community as peaceful and chill as it has always been. Let's leave no room for free hate and put logic and reasons to our opinions so everyone can learn and so Everbyte can know exactly why are we angry or disapointed.

[rockycute223]

#JusticeforWildGrinders

Do you remember the TV show Wild Grinders?

It's this old Nicktoon created by skateboarder Rob Dyrdek, in case you didn't know. It's no longer on TV, or anywhere else for that matter... You can only see it on Amazon Prime Video or this kid's streaming site called Kidoodle.tv, as far as I know. I used to really enjoy that show when I was younger, but I'm aware that not everyone does. I believe it is still only me and a few other users who watch and enjoy it.

I decided to watch this show again a few months ago, and it's still pretty good; however, there are some things I want to say about it.

Let me begin by discussing the characters.

The designs were rather simplistic, with only their stereotypical personalities serving as inspiration. The art style was most likely influenced by The Nutshack, a way worse show! When it came to the personalities, the characters were somewhat bland and one-note. We learn about their backstories and certain facts about them in some episodes, but we don't learn much about their personalities.

Then there's the humor. The jokes weren't the best, but I thought some of them were funny. They were also a little odd and nasty, especially when it came to Meaty (Rob's dog) farting. I don't really watch any of Rob's other shows, so I'm not sure whether this is his sense of humor or what.

I was reading some reviews on the Internet Movie Database, and one person complained that the show didn't do a good job of portraying skateboarding. I'm not familiar with skateboarding, but this one is. He said that, in addition to doing several actual tricks, they also performed the physically impossible. This could be because Rob is the crew's only skater.

I'd also like to point out that the Flash animation in this show is probably some of the worst I've ever seen. I'm not anti-Flash; in fact, I enjoy Flash animation. It is the people who use it. But, as Mr. Enter once said, “Good writing can save bad animation, but bad writing can never be saved by good animation.” And I believe the same thing.

To make this show better, instead of random events, they could have given the storyline more structure. I would also suggest giving the characters more personality, including backstories and more unique designs. They should've also hired more full-time skaters for the crew so that they could be better educated on skating. They invited some other skaters to guest star, and they could have definitely asked them for skating tips. I also wish the show kept Jackknife and Emo Crys' previous voices and characteristics. I'm not a fan of Jackknife's southern American-sounding voice, but I don't mind Emo Crys'. Finally, the animators should have taken more training on how to use Flash more effectively. Apart from my ranting, this show had the potential to be amazing if Rob and the rest of the crew put more effort into it.

[jimlingss]

can i request a yoongi chef au? i feel like yoongi's culinary skills are underrated, and I'm just a slut for chef aus in general

Anonymous said: Hi I saw ur request open posts for the new year!!! Could u write more yoongi stories🥺?!?! Your stories are so fantastic and i’m thirsty for more yoongi lolol🤪(hopefully u get enough votes to do more of him haha)

I feel like Jin’s the one who’s usually written as the chef, prob because he’s the better known chef in BTS, but you’re right! There’s gotta be more chef Yoongi!AUs, so here you go!!!

↳ Buttering Up

2.2k || 100% Fluff & Flirtation || Min Yoongi || Chef!AU

He clearly doesn’t know who you are.

“Sorry to keep you waiting.”

You hum, arms crossed as you eye him up and down. His black hair is practically a bowl cut, bangs covering his forehead. He’s in casual clothes — a taupe trench and black pants — looking like he’s ready for a trip to the grocery store rather than to cook. You wonder where this child crawled out from.

“You’re Yoongi?”

“That I am.” He approaches the door of the restaurant before plunging his hands inside his trench coat pockets. He fishes out the key and unlocks it, ushering you inside. “Hope you don’t mind that the restaurant’s closed down.”

You mind much more that he left you waiting on the cold city street for over ten minutes. You still can’t believe he was late. The audacity.

“I would’ve liked to see how you and your staff do your dinner service.”

“Unfortunately, we’re booked full for the next two months.”

You scoff — how doesn’t he know who you are? You’re a food critic who’s brought highly regarded restaurants to their knees through a review of five sentences. Your words alone has had rippled effects in the industry. Even the most talented chefs hold their breaths when you taste-test.

You make Gordon Ramsey look like Mother Teresa.

This Yoongi character is much too arrogant to not respect you. His new and upcoming restaurant might have raving reviews, but you’ll see what’s really going on.

“Sit wherever you’d like.”

There are no waiters in fancy garb, no hand sewn tablecloths made of silk. He doesn’t even pull out the chair for you. Instead, he’s off flickering on the lights of the restaurant while you choose a wooden table and chair right in front of his open kitchen — which is a horrible mistake in itself.

Open kitchens have always been a concept that has fallen short in your eyes. It’s much too noisy during dinner service and it gets smelly fast. Who actually wants to leave smelling like butter and oil?

It’s something you note as you get settled. 

Your coat drapes at the back of the chair and then you watch him. Yoongi’s taken off his trench as well, revealing a white long sleeve that he’s beginning to roll up to his elbows. He’s lean and his build is small, but somehow, he’s far from being scrawny. You gawk at the veins running up his forearm until he casually asks—

“Do you have a preference for wine?”

“I’m fine with any.”

He hums and comes over from the glass cabinet with a bottle of chardonnay and a wine glass. Yoongi pops the bottle easily and pours into the pristine glass with a mere tilt of his wrist. You watch the stream fill the glass a quarter way full.

“Is there a menu?”

“You don’t need one.”

Your brows raise. “Excuse me?” 

“If I were you, I’d put myself in the chef’s hands entirely and go with their recommendation.” He strides away, placing the wine bottle on the other table and then he turns with a glint in his eye and his mouth slightly crooked upwards. “Unless, of course, you don’t trust your chef.”

Oh. He’s confident. 

You can’t wait for his ego to blow up in his face.

“Fine then.” Your head tilts upwards. “What’s your recommendation then?”

He rounds his way to go into the kitchen that’s only a few meters away from where you sit. “Risotto with grilled chicken breast, topped off with caramelized onions, mushroom, grilled zucchini and sautéed tomatoes.”

You roll your eyes. What a basic dish. Isn’t it just rice? And with chicken breast?! Ew. It's guaranteed to be bland.

“Alright then.” You give a smile that might be more mocking than intended. “We’ll see how it tastes.”

Yoongi starts and while sipping the chardonnay, you take a good look at the restaurant from your spot. The place is rustic with a hint of contemporary. There’s exposed brick, wooden tables and chairs, and low, yellow lighting. There’s nothing particularly impressive about the place.

Soon, the sound of rapid, rhythmic chopping fills the space and then sizzling. You watch him intently. And you’re appalled. This Yoongi guy commits the worst cooking sins — his pan is cold when he starts throwing on ingredients. He cooks with olive oil. He overcrowds the pan. And he doesn’t even taste test once as he cooks.

What the actual fuck. 

There’s a line between arrogance and insanity, and he was crossing it.

You cringe when he starts using his metallic spatula on the non-stick skillet.

Is he even qualified to run a restaurant?!

Or maybe your assistant sent you information about the wrong restaurant? Or maybe this was not the guy you were supposed to be eating from. What if he poisons you or kills off all of your taste buds?! Your career would be ruined.

“Everything going okay?” you pipe up.

He glances up at you for the first time, eyes peering past his bangs. “Yep. Should be done in five.”

Food is simple. It either tastes good or it doesn’t. But the higher up you go and the fancier it gets, the more convoluted the food tastes with bland flakes of gold and the same old truffle shavings. That or it’s entirely boring and unoriginal. 

Or in this case, it might kill you. Which would be the first. And you’re not happy about it.

You feel unsettled when he plops the dish in front of you.

“Chef’s recommendation.”

“Thanks.”

You feel unsettled because it actually smells good. The aroma that fills your senses is flavoursome and buttery, and the thyme on top adds a fresh hint. You’re also unsettled because the plating isn’t actually bad. It’s been presented in a pasta bowl with wavy designs and the chicken breast is thinly and neatly sliced on top. It’s clean. It’s bright. It’s colourful.

But the most lethal poisons are the appetizing ones.

“Are you going to wait until it gets cold?”

You look up, brows raising at how he’s gotten comfortable in the chair across from you. Usually the chefs and waiters or waitresses like to skedaddle off and leave you to your own thoughts, too afraid to stand in your intense scrutiny. But Min Yoongi twists off the cap of his water bottle and casually downs it in front of you.

“I’m just looking at the presentation.”

“Tastes better than it looks,” he exhales after swallowing his water. 

Your expression becomes skeptical. But you take the silver spoon beside you anyhow and decide not to waste any more time.

The spoonful goes into your mouth. He watches you. You chew.

Instantly, you halt. 

The flavour hits your tongue. Creamy. Thick. But each individual grain of rice still has some firmness with a discernible texture. It’s been done al dente. There’s sweetness from the caramelized onions. An earthy flavour from the mushrooms. A zesty touch from the thyme. The chicken breast is somehow still juicy and the tomatoes burst on your palate. 

Suddenly, you’re thrusted back into your childhood. Those summer days spent in the cottage. Sun-kissed cheeks, dirtied knees, cotton dresses. You can hear your late grandmother in the kitchen. The way she calls out that it’s lunchtime. You can feel the comfort of family and love.

It feels like you’ve become the food critic in the ratatouille movie. 

You almost cry.

“What do you think?”

You clear your throat. You have to be honest. There’s no way you can lie about something like this. “It’s good. I think...this is the best risotto I’ve ever had. You cooked it perfectly and the toppings you chose were absolutely immaculate with this dish—”

You look up at him. Min Yoongi has an enormous, cocky smirk plastered across his stupid face.

It’s entirely off-putting. 

“But of course,” you quickly add, “there are many ways you could improve on it. You could add cilantro—”

“That would unnecessarily drown out the notes of thyme you taste,” he rebukes without a single beat and you scoff. 

“I noticed you didn’t add any pepper to it which could deepen the flavour.”

“Except this dish doesn’t need it,” Yoongi deadpans. “You don’t need to help me make any adjustments. I think I know what I’m doing better than you are. Just do your job and I’ll do mine.”

You suck in your cheek and narrow your eyes on him before you take another bite of the risotto while it’s still hot. “The food is delicious, but I must say, the company really spoils it.”

Yoongi’s slumped with one cheek resting in his hand, elbow on the table. He lazily stares at you with that smirk of his. “Really? Because if I didn’t know any better, you look nervous rather than annoyed.”

You scoff for the second time. “Why would I be nervous?”

“Maybe you didn’t expect the food to taste as good as it does and that makes me unexpectedly attractive,” he states plainly. You almost choke. You hit your chest as you sputter. “Or maybe you’re intimidated by me. I’ve gotten both before.”

You wipe your mouth with the napkin. “I’m afraid you’re not very perceptive, Min Yoongi.”

“Really? I think I am.” He smiles, the corners of his mouth quirked. “I’ve read your reviews before.”

You’re unamused. “Have you now? So you must know how difficult I am to satisfy.”

His smirk is sly and it’s jarring against his softer, more tender features. He’s smaller than the men you’re used to being around, but somehow it feels like he’s taken up the entire space of the restaurant. His focus on you is sweat-inducing. Even if you don’t want to admit it. 

“I don’t think so. You’ve just been eating shit food,” he says bluntly and your brow cocks. “You just need someone good you can trust. Someone who can take care of you properly.”

You’re not sure if the double entendre is purposeful. You wouldn’t put it past him.

“And is this someone you?”

Yoongi shrugs and sits back. “It could be.”

You grab your glass of chardonnay and gulp the rest in an effort to stop the conversation before it completely derails into a different direction. Yet, Yoongi’s half-lidded and darkened eyes stay on yours with each swallow. He’s unfazed. Unbothered. And that bothers you even more — bothered in a way that makes your face hot.

There’s a clack as you put the wine glass down and gasp. 

“I’m a professional.” You won’t be swayed so easily. “I can’t be bribed.”

“Of course.” He blinks as if he doesn’t know what you’re talking about. You glare at him and he gestures to the dish. “Please. Keep eating.” 

You finish the plate.

“Do you want any seconds?” he asks as he gets up.

“I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?” Yoongi lingers, all too brazen and fearless. “If you don’t get any more now, you might have to come back for more.”

This time, you don’t try to hide the roll of your eyes. “That’s a presumptuous assumption.”

Yoongi smirks and his voice is husky. “After getting a taste from me, everyone comes back for more.

You scoff.

Min’s Restaurant Review

Three nights ago, I ate at Min’s Restaurant and met the main man in the kitchen. Unfortunately, he is a difficult person to interact with. I hope no one has the disservice of having to speak to the chef behind the dishes. Doing so may as well ruin the experience. Furthermore, his cooking methods are unconventional and unorthodox. It was completely shocking to watch.

However, and what I would consider most important, the food at Min’s Restaurant is spectacular. What Min’s Restaurant lacks in likeable personnel, they make up in the served cuisine. The meal that was prepared for me not only subverted my initial expectations, but overcomes, what I consider, what the food industry is lacking in this modern age exactly. Without unnecessary garnishes and ingredients, the flavours of Min’s Restaurant are both light and deep. It was an undeniable delight to consume and for the first time, I licked my plate clean. 

It is undoubted that the man behind Min’s Restaurant has the hands of god.

You should have pride.

But you’ve always loved good food. It’s your Achilles heel. It’s the one thing you’ve been passionate about since you were a kid. The reason why you love your job.

Even after writing such a review, you find yourself booking another reservation. But as a customer instead of a critic.

Of course, they were booked full for the next six months, largely thanks to your review, and they swiftly refused you with numerous apologies. But they called back not ten minutes later. You have a feeling that your name finally sunk into them — that he had something to do with it. 

That theory is confirmed when you arrive. The person in question is next to the seemingly nervous hostess as the noisy kitchen echoes throughout the busy restaurant. 

In the low lighting, Min Yoongi stands there with a relaxed smirk. As if he was expecting you. As if he knew you’d come crawling back to him to eat out of the palm of his hand, literally and figuratively.

You hate that he’s right.

“Welcome back.”

[pikapeppa]

Varric vs. Solas: Wake Up

I watched the Dec 2020 DA4 teaser trailer, heard Varric and SAW MA VHENAN, and I had to write a little something. Behold: a little post-Trespasser, mid-Tevinter Nights chit-chat between Varric and Solas, with a twist.

2400 words. Read here on AO3.

************************

Varric scrawled his signature one last time, then put his plume down with a sigh. He resentfully eyed the pile of documents he’d just finished signing; most of them were orders or requests that Bran could easily have signed on his behalf. Varric suspected that this was his comeuppance for telling Bran that he didn’t care that the new signposts in Lowtown were two centimetres taller than the regulation standards. 

“Not like the signposts will help,” he muttered to himself. “People are gonna get lost in Lowtown no matter what. It’s just the charm of the place.” Sure, maybe the real reason people got lost in Kirkwall was that the city design was based on some old magister’s crazy blood magic plan, but that didn’t bear thinking about right now – or ever, really, considering the other shit going on in the world right now. 

He sighed and regarded his paper-strewn desk. There was the tidy pile of documents he’d just signed, and the untidy larger pile of documents he had yet to review. A little stack of coded letters sat in a tray by his left hand — letters that he’d be sending out by raven once he was done here. And finally, poking out from underneath a dog-eared copy of the latest Randy Dowager, was the long-neglected draft of his most recent chapter of Swords and Shields 2. 

A pang of guilt penetrated his fatigue. It had been months now since he’d sent Cassandra a new chapter. He could try to get a little writing done now, while the Viscount's Keep was quiet in the middle of the night, but his eyes were stinging with tiredness…

Ah, what the hell, he thought. He couldn’t deprive his most loyal reader. He pulled out the chapter pages and quickly skimmed the last one to see where he’d left, off then dipped his plume and began to write. 

He had barely gotten out two paragraphs before he heard a soft knock on his office door – so soft he thought he’d imagined it. When the knock happened again, he looked up warily.

It was almost midnight. Who would be coming to his office this late? Whoever it was, it couldn’t be urgent. If it was urgent, they’d be banging, not knocking quietly. 

He leaned back in his chair and idly ran his thumb over the small stiletto blade he kept in a hidden pocket on his thigh – you could never be too careful these days. “Come on in,” he called. 

The door opened slowly, and a tall hooded figure stepped into his office. “Master Tethras,” the figure said. “It’s good to see you.”

A ripple of shock shot down Varric’s spine. He recognized the voice long before the hood was pushed back, revealing a shiny bald head and a subtly tragic expression.

Solas? he thought incredulously. Solas was here? Here, in his office? Impossible. For years they'd tried fruitlessly to track Solas down using any means available, and even with the knowledge of his last known whereabouts from his encounter with Charter, they hadn’t been able to find him. And now here he was, in Varric’s office, strolling in as casually as though he’d just come out of the rotunda at Skyhold? 

It was ridiculous. Totally ridiculous. But since when did things ever make sense, really?

He quickly gathered his wits and leaned back in his chair. “Chuckles. Funny seeing you here.” He raised an eyebrow. “Or should I call you the Dread Wolf?”

Solas let out a little laugh – a very tired-sounding laugh. “Please don’t.”

Varric smirked. “What, reputation getting too heavy for you?”

“You would know, I suppose,” Solas said softly. “You have written about the crushing weight of a reputation several times over.” 

“Sure have,” Varric said. 

Solas nodded. For a long moment, they were silent as they looked at each other, and Varric got the impression that they were sizing each other up, almost like–

Don’t use a wolf-related simile, Varric scolded himself. He gestured at one of the visitors’ chairs across from his desk. “Have a seat.”

“Thank you,” Solas said. He seated himself on the chair, somehow managing to make his rich dark cloak drape elegantly around himself without making a show of arranging it, and Varric took careful note of the elegance of the gesture. It was… different than the Solas he was used to. More reserved but more powerful at the same time.

Lavellan mentioned he’d changed, he thought. Well, here was the proof. But just how much had Solas changed in the years since Varric had last seen him?

He sat back comfortably. “So,” he said.

“So,” Solas agreed.

Another moment of silence ensued, and the back of Varric’s neck began to prickle. Solas’s expression was calm and neutral, almost alarmingly neutral, and Varric hoped he looked equally unfazed by the strangeness of the current situation. It might be as weird as a giant nug with a beard and a pirate’s hat to be sitting across from an elven god, but Varric didn’t want to show it.

The silence thickened between them. Varric itched to break it, to know what Solas was doing here, but he didn’t want to ask. Something about this visit felt like a power play, and Varric was fairly sure he’d lose if he asked a direct question.

Instead of asking why Solas was in his office, he asked something far more innocuous. “Any interest in a hand of diamondback?”

Solas’s posture relaxed slightly, and he gave Varric a faint smile. “I would like that. Thank you.”

Varric nodded and pulled a deck of worn cards from his desk drawer. He shuffled the cards and dealt a hand, and for the first time in years, Varric and Solas played a game of diamondback together.

They played a couple of hands in silence. Varric won the first round and Solas won the second, and by the time they were on their third, Varric was feeling much more in control of the situation.

He discarded a card and selected another. “It’s been a while, Chuckles. What have you been up to?”

“Travelling, mostly,” Solas said. “Observing. And yourself?”

“Signing my life away,” Varric said dryly, and he nodded to the pile of signed documents on his desk.

Solas’s smile widened slightly. “I see.” He glanced at the unfinished chapter under Varric’s elbow. “You have continued to write as well, I see?”

Varric huffed. “Eh, not really. This is just for Cassandra.”

“For Cassandra exclusively?” Solas said.

Varric nodded. “Aveline — she’s the inspiration for the main character — she demanded that I stop writing it. I told her that making me choose between her and Cassandra would be putting me between a rock and a hard place. Literally.” 

Solas chuckled. The rare sound of Solas’s amusement was strangely familiar, and it only served to highlight the weirdness of the situation.

Varric dealt another hand. “How’s Cole? You seen him lately?”

“Yes,” Solas said. “He is happily dwelling in the Fade once more.”

His tone was very bland, Varric noticed. With Solas, ‘bland’ usually meant ‘something very significant’. Had something happened to Cole, then?

Varric’s gut twisted with concern, but he carefully kept his expression calm. “Tell the kid I said ‘hi’ during your next Fade nap. We miss him around here.”

“I shall,” Solas said softly. “It is your turn.”

Varric nodded and selected a card. They finished the round, which went to Solas this time, and as Varric shuffled the cards, he carefully considered what to say next. Everything he and Solas said to each other involved giving up a piece of information. Even admitting that he and Cassandra were still in touch was a piece of information that could be used – though not one that would be hard to discover even by a fairly poor spy. But in such a fraught situation, Varric needed to be very careful about what he said next.  

It was time to try and unbalance Solas. And there was only one thing — or rather, one person — that had been able to soften Solas up in the past. Would a mention of her still be enough to unbalance this especially placid and self-possessed version of the elven apostate?

Only one way to find out, Varric thought. He dealt out their cards, then looked at Solas. “She’s fine, by the way.”

Solas met his eye. And for a split second, swift as the blink of an eye, an expression crossed his face — an expression that landed like a strike to Varric’s gut. It was a complicated mixture of heartwrenching longing and regret: the kind of regret that could haunt a person for decades. The kind of regret that spoke of near-misses and what-ifs that would never be resolved. 

The kind of regret that could twist and fester in the walls of a once-loved fortress until it became literally monstrous. 

Then, just as quickly as the weight of emotion crossed Solas’s face, it was gone — but not quickly enough for Varric to miss it. 

Solas still cares about Lavellan, Varric thought. This was very useful information to have. If Solas still loved Lavellan, if the Dread Wolf still had some kind of attachment to their world, then there was hope. A little hint of hope, sure, but Varric was well-accustomed to seemingly-hopeless situations by now. 

Hope is good, he thought. Hope’ll keep us going. He couldn’t take any pleasure from this information, though — not when he knew Lavellan still loved Solas too.  

Solas, meanwhile, had returned his now-neutral gaze to his cards. “I’m glad to hear it,” he said. “You see her often, I take it?”

“Nah,” Varric said. “She’s still out in the Hunterhorn Mountains.”

Solas looked up with a tiny frown. “The Hunterhorn Mountains?”

“Yeah,” Varric said. “With the rest of the Seekers. What’s left of them, anyway.”

Solas blinked. Then his face cleared with comprehension — and a whisper of disappointment. “Ah,” he said. “Cassandra. Of course.”

Varric raised his eyebrows in faux-innocence. “Who did you think I meant?”

Solas stared stonily at him, and Varric steadily returned his gaze. Then Solas huffed softly, and a hint of a smile touched the corner of his lips. He looked at his cards once more without replying, and Varric watched him carefully as they played out the remainder of the round, but his face had resumed its unnervingly placid expression.

Varric won the round. When he’d collected the cards once more, he paused and gave Solas a frank look. “Listen, Chuckles, the personal visit is nice, but I’ve gotta wonder what it’s about.” 

Solas leaned back and crossed one ankle over his knee, looking supremely comfortable for an ancient god who had just been called out by a mere mortal. “Truthfully?” he said. “It was an experiment.”

Varric frowned.  This was not what he expected Solas to say. “An experiment?”

“Yes,” Solas said. “I am both interested and somewhat alarmed to see that it worked.”

“Okay,” Varric said slowly. He couldn’t decide whether to be amused or annoyed that Solas was being his usual cryptic self. “So… what happen next, then?”

“That is largely up to you,” Solas said.

“What do you mean?” Varric asked.

“I mean that the choice is yours. It is your mind, after all.” He gestured at the cards in Varric’s hands. “We could continue talking and playing, if you like.”

Varric narrowed his eyes. What did Solas mean, ‘it is your mind’? “And what if I don’t want to?” he said suspiciously. “Are you going to kill me?”

Solas’s smile widened into something indescribably sad. “No, Varric. If you don’t wish to continue playing, then I suggest you wake up.”

Varric jerked and opened his eyes. “What?” he blurted.

Solas didn’t reply. In fact, Solas wasn’t there. 

Disoriented and alarmed, Varric looked around his empty office. What the hell? he thought. So… wait. He was confused. How — what had just happened? He’d been asleep, so how had he been playing cards with Solas? 

A sudden realization gripped him. Thinking or doing things or seeing people while he was asleep: Varric had never done this before. In fact, he didn’t know any dwarf ever who had done that before. 

“Did… did I just have a dream?” he said incredulously to his empty office.

No one answered — of course no one did, because Varric was alone. But… Andraste’s knickers, that had felt so real. If that was a dream, how did humans and elves and qunari stand it every night?

He rubbed his face roughly. He was spooked; there was no denying it. And he couldn’t make sense of how this was even possible. Everyone in Thedas knew that dwarves didn’t dream; it was a fact, like the sky being blue and grass being green. But if Varric had just had a dream, and Solas said it was an experiment… 

Shit, he thought. Maybe that meant Solas was doing some kind of weird new magic, which didn’t bode well. If that was the case, he needed to talk to some mages about this. Good thing Lavellan was in Kirkwall at the moment. He could talk to her and to Dorian through her sending crystal thing, and they could explain what had just happened. 

He stood up and stretched, then quickly locked the coded letters in the hidden compartment in his desk before leaving his office. As he made his way through the silent Viscount’s Keep, he tried to remember what he and Solas had talked about during the dream, but it was becoming indistinct. He remembered playing cards, and he remembered Solas saying it was an experiment, but the things they’d discussed… 

He rubbed his forehead, frustrated that his memory of the dream was so fuzzy. Had they talked about lyrium? Varric didn’t think so. Maybe… maybe about Varric’s books? That was possible. Was it normal for dreams to just disappear so quickly? He thought he remembered humans complaining about this, but Solas always made it sound like his dreams were so clear… 

Then Varric remembered something very clear: the look on Solas’s face when he was thinking about Lavellan. That wistful, yearning expression that spoke of hope and tragedy at the same time — the same expression that Lavellan wore when she thought no one was looking.

His heart sank, and he sighed. It looked like shit was about to get weird again for Lavellan, and soon. Then again, when had shit ever not been weird? 

At least we’re never bored, he thought wryly. With that semi-positive thought in mind, Varric stepped out of the Viscount’s Keep and into the heart of Hightown.  

[soyouareandrewdobson]

Andy on Asian Animation or SYAC: The Master Review 2

Let’s talk a bit about anime and Dobson’s work relation with it.

I think we can all agree, that starting from the late 90s and early 2000s on, anime and manga became extremely popular in the western world. Sure, Japanese animation was nothing completely new to us (Speed Racer, Nadia-Secret of Blue Water, Samurai Pizza Cats, Sailor Moon, Kimba and Akira e.g. come to my mind as properties already known in the west before 1995) but it really was around this time that thanks to “mainstream” stuff like Dragon Ball and Pokemon people became aware of how different Japanese animation was from western. Eventually resulting in the really good shit (like Cowboy Bebop, Black Lagoon, Kenshin and Heat Guy J) coming over and enriching nerd culture for more than just a few people who knew of it as an obscurity at that point. Now, if you know anything about Dobson, you likely know that his relationship with anime is rather… complicated to say the least. Or, to let him explain it with his own words…

Dobson essentially likes silly and wacky 90s anime. But later on he hated anime in general, because it got too popular and a bad experience with an anime club in college soured his enjoyment of it. Furthermore, he put the blame on his lackluster art style and storytelling capabilities as seen in the likes of Formera, Patty and Alex ze Pirate, on anime in general, while also claiming that Disney pulling the plug on 2D animation is the result of the “anime inspired” Treasure Planet, meaning anime in a sense deprived him of his chance at working at his dream job and “ruining” western animation.

Which to me has always been ignorant as fuck. For starters, I can understand not liking certain stories or genres, either for objective or subjective reasons. But to hate on an entire nation’s form of entertainment (not just individual shows or genres), depriving yourself of the chance of potentially watching a lot of good stuff while also being rather insulting to these other works and people enjoying them? Especially when the stuff you can supposedly “stomach” has been rather simplistic compared to other things?

 Second, blaming Japan for “poisoning” your art style? What, did the ghost of Osamu Tezuka possess you and FORCE you to put sweatdrops on your characters forehead while also going for the rather simplistic character style of Rumiko Takahashi, as well as emulating the slapstick of the likes as Slayers and Ranma ½?

 Next, if he had emulated them successfully, I say he would have actually managed to tell decent enough stories worth to read online. Not create Uncle Peggy aka “Discount Happosai” or the bland proto-Isekai known as Formera.

I mean, let’s give some context here: There have been people who successfully managed to emulate certain anime and manga aesthetics into western animation and make it work. Otherwise we wouldn’t have gotten the likes of Avatar-The last Airbender, Samurai Jack, the Animatrix, Thundercats 2011, Super Robot Monkey Hyperforce Go, Kim Possible, W.I.T.C.H, Megas XLR and Wakfu. You know, shows that are actually awesome as hell.

Heck, Dobson’s favorite animated show of the last decade, Steven Universe, is heavily inspired by anime aesthetics to the point of being embarrassing.

 But Dobson… well, he emulated anime aesthetics in his work the same way as these crimes against animation did.

Combined with his general shortcomings as a storyteller it is no wonder his initial comics did not do well.

 Lastly, and sorry for digressing here a bit, but if the Wikipedia entry on Treasure Planet is something to go by, there was no real inspiration by anime involved in making this movie.

Supposedly the idea of making an animated Treasure Planet in outer space movie was already pitched by Ron Clements WAY BACK in 1985 but only came to be after Michael Eisner greenlighted stuff in the late 90s. Design wise the movie was supposed to look 70% traditional and 30% sci-fi inspired and people took inspiration for the art style by illustrators associated with the Brandywine School of Illustration. A western style of illustration established in the 19th century, that had a big impact on the illustration styles for many 19th and early 20th century adventure novels and short stories.

What, is anime supposed to be the only form of animation allowed to have sci fi elements or steampunk in it? Fucks sake, The Lion King and Atlantis, which came out one year earlier to Treasure Planet, were likely more inspired by anime. Don’t believe me? Watch Atlantis and then a certain anime by Studio Gainax called “Nadia-Secret of Blue Water”. Or read up on the controversy surrounding the two.

The truth is, it is not entirely clear what caused Disney to shut down 2D feature film animation in the early 2000s. In fact, if anything, most people put the blame on Michael Eisner and a certain change in the publics taste in movies in general, combined with Disney trying to turn almost every movie they had into a franchise via cheap follow up movies on video and DVD.

And even if Disney did not shut down, are we really supposed to believe that a certain guy with fedora would have made it big at Disney to the point Alex ze Pirate would have been made into a feature film?

But Dobson could never quite understand this and instead of “reinventing” himself properly, he would rant about anime and its fans in one form or another…

 And on the peak of his hissy fit create this little art piece he baptized Anime Sux. Alternatively “West vs East”. Or as I like to call it, slap a jap.

Now, the pic was done in 2008 and Dobson claimed sometimes in the last decade, that he no longer holds his old opinions. Unfortunately, by that point he would also more or less use the chance to vent in his webcomic about anime (or rather its fans), which brings us finally back to SYAC.

 While Dobson never outright thematized in more detail WHY he hates anime and manga in SYAC (likely cause if his comic reasoning was even slightly like his reasoning in his blogs, people would have torn him apart like a bag of paper) he did use the format to punch down on anime fans and their preferences.

 For example, for someone who has a 4chan story going around of having been rather arrogant towards others in college for not liking Ranma ½, Dobson has THIS little college related comic to show off, where he portrays an aspiring manga artist as a delusional jackass.

Then in this strip titled manga, his manga fan is essentially portrayed as a young woman dressing up like a very stereotypical high school anime girl, who is in the wrong for even just DARING to draw her comics in the direction manga are read.

On one hand, I get Dobson’s point. She could be at risk of alienating a market of readers as she is obviously drawing for a western audience. Then again, if she doesn’t draw a traditional western comic but a manga, why shouldn’t she? I mean, as long as she enjoys it, which I assume she does as she seems genuinely just happy when stating that she likes manga, why not let her? Plus, this comic was drawn in the late 2000s. I think by then most people kinda knew how to read from right to left, so Dobson’s claim she would alienate or confuse people is kinda redundant. If anything I find a) Dobson getting angry at her just very petty (just let her have fun) and b) portraying a western manga fan as someone who would be confused by the sheer idea of reading stuff from right to left is also in itself just really dumb and insulting. What is Dobson trying to imply? That anime fans are so stuck in the way they consume certain media, they can’t act according to “western standards” again?

Then there is this strip where yet another female anime fan is essentially portrayed as the embodiment of how “ignorant” manga fans are of the idea of different art styles...

Which becomes rather laughable once Dobson describes his style as a mixture of European, American and  Japanese. Why? Because he is the one oversimplifying things, rather than the anime fan.

You see while anime and manga of all sorts do share certain aesthetics (like the black and white art style, emphasize on the eyes of characters, the way hair is drawn, recurring tropes within certain genres and so on) style wise (both in art and storytelling) there can be severe differences, depending on the artist alone. Akira Toriyama’s style differentiates significantly from the likes of Eichiro Oda, Rumiko Takahashi, Kentaro Miura, Tezuka, Kaori Yuki and so forth.

The same also goes for many western artists. Herge had a significantly different style from Uderzo and Goscinny. Don Rosa has a different style in which he drew Scrooge McDuck than Carl Barks did. Rob Liefeld and Jim Lee draw mainstream superheroes differently compared to how Jack Kirby, George Perez and others did. Heck, Ethan Van Sciver and Jim Lee were closely associated with Green Lantern in the 2000s and look how they differentiate.

 Which btw is the kind of skill level Dobson would have needed to have, to make it in the mainstream industry

So when Dobson says “I draw in a combination of American, Western and Japanese” all I can think is the following: THAT DOESN’T NARROW IT DOWN! WHAT THE HECK HAVE YOU LEARNT IN COLLEGE ABOUT COMICS? WHICH ARTISTS, WORKS AND STORYTELLERS DO YOU TRY TO EITHER EMULATE OR HAVE BEEN INSPIRED BY?

Then there is this little thing…

Where do I even begin? How about the fact that Dobson’s hand in the last panel looks like he has lost a thumb? The fact that the little boy, anime fan or not, is aware of Sae Sawanoguchi, a character from a short lived OVA and anime series from the 90s, which considering his age, I kinda doubt he would be aware off. Unlike Dobson, who got into anime in the 90s and admits in fact within the posts I loaded up earlier, that he had watched the anime in particular, known in the west as Magic User Club.

Then there is the implication by Dobson, that anime is so “corruptive” as a medium, little kids don’t even know the most basic characters in western animation because of it. I expect in a next panel, that all of sudden some 50s PSA guy comes along and lectures me that if I want this kind of thing not to happen at MY convention, I need to teach little kids more about the GOOD western animation, instead of the BAD eastern one. Then there is this rather unflattering portrayal of a shonen ai/shojou ai fangirl…

 Which makes me laugh cause honestly, even some of the worst shonen ai and shojou ai can do better in portraying a “realistic” gay relationship than Patty if you ask me.

Also, as much as I think fangirls can be extremely thirsty (I have read my fair share of extremely stupid yaoi and yuri fanfics) I think that in hindsight Dobson is really not anyone to complain about shipping obsession and sex when he himself has KorraSami, the Ladybug fandom and a certain rat pirate under his floppy belt.

As you can imagine, Dobson would get heat for those comics, considering how he himself has been greatly inspired by anime and manga for his major comics. And while I don’t have any explicit deviantart posts of him reacting to criticism in that regard, I do have this comic which addresses it directly.

 And yeah, if I were schoolgirl number 4, I would just sigh and walk away after telling Dobson that his mistakes and shortcomings are not related to having consumed anime, but rather by what sort of anime (and other stories) he had consumed and the amount of effort he had put in creating his stories instead of emulating just something more popular. Plus, if you really want people to draw more from life, how about drawing more from life yourself down the line? And no, tracing Star Wars movie frames does not count.

Finally, Dobson, considering how very little most people think of your work, I say mission accomplished: People have learnt from your mistakes and know not to be a Dobson.

And at last, there is this comic, which kinda wraps up Dobson’s “vendetta” with anime and manga fans within the pages of SYAC.

By trying to mock anime fans and make them look just as shallow as he is. I at least suppose. Honestly, the message of this comic is rather muddled. On one hand, I would say the strawman accusing Dobson hates anime just because it is popular is very simplified. After all, Dobson has made his reasons for not liking anime clear in a few more details. It’s just that the details in and on themselves in real life are still rather shallow and boil down to a lot of personal bias rather than an objective criticism of actual flaws. Which I think is worth pointing out.

But frankly, what is Dobson trying to say or point out here? That the strawman is not so different or even dumber than him, because he hates Justin Bieber for “shallow” and superficial reasons too?

Okay, this doesn’t quite work as well as Dobson wants. First, the argument Dobson’s strawman makes is in huge parts based on some verified statements Dobson made for not liking anime. Second, he just says a name and that triggers the guy to express his hatred for Bieber. We don’t know why the guy hates Bieber and you could make in fact the case, that he hates him not because he is popular, but because he has a genuine issue with the artist, his work or his behavior as a human being. Third, if you want to make yourself look like the better person Dobson, try to argue with the guy and make solid arguments why you don’t like anime. Instead you just deflect the criticism by changing the subject and then try to make yourself look like the “smarter” person in the room by mocking your critic in the most condescending manner.

Which as I think about it, sounds like your modus operandi on twitter and tumblr.

Weirdly enough, that more or less marks the “end” of Dobson tackling anime fans and the beef he has with them within the pages of SYAC. Despite how much Dobson’s negative reputation especially in early years was build around him hating on anime and belittling its fans, he didn’t really do more afterwards in the Dobson focused pages of SYAC. And mind you, those strips were also separated by other strips in-between, focused on Dobson just being at conventions.

Unfortunately for him, the strips didn’t really help in any way to diminish that negative reputation and instead just confirmed for many, that Dobson can’t handle criticism about his flawed opinion on anime. If anything, it just made people think even less of Dobson, as the strips just painted him as someone who would rather portray his critics as strawman he can be “rightfully” annoyed at, instead of fellow humans with slightly different tastes in entertainment, who are still worth listening to.

So, now that we have the anime fan related “annoyances” out of the way, what other sort of silly problems in making webcomics would Dobson cover in his strips and are “relatable” to everyone?

Lets see some of these examples in the next part.

[kawaii-chronicles]

Current state of Genshin Impact and some personal thoughts

First things first major spoilers, leaks etc of the new story of Inazuma and possible upcoming stuff that was leaked. It could be false so don't take it to seriously. All right so....besides the disaster that is the anniversary. Currently on Twitter the genshin fandom has been heavily divided and only seams to get worse at every update. And i wanna share some of my own thoughts and hopefully not get canceled because of it XD 1. Inazuma was like game of thrones...it had a amazing start only to get worse till the end (insert drawing horse meme). Usually i can excuse when stuff is rushed. But when is PLAIN in your face, how rushed and how things went form A to B...then there is a problem...And i believe those who have seen reviews, analysis videos and such know what I'm talking about. I don't wanna write an entire novel so ill keep going to the next thing. 2. Baal only got popular and got more money than any character, BECAUSE OF A MEME !! People did not liked Baal IN TILL BOOBA SWORD CAME TO BE ! I still remember when her design was leaked ! People called her bland and boring, that they will skip her banner and shits but lord and behold the trailer dropped and ,,YO BOOBA SWORD HELL YEAH !! BAAL WHEN ?! WE NEED BAAL !!''. *face palm*.....I like Baal don't get me wrong...her fight animation is awesome and i did enjoyed her backstory. But using her and how her banner managed to top everyone as a excuse on why Mihoyo prefers to to make more female characters and such.....was nothing more than a desire to get a meme, it was not for the gameplay it was not for the story or personality at least in my opinion....and same might be for Scaramouche...If he did not do the fandango in that event I'm very much certain that most people might have not been desperate to have him playable. And btw. 3. How the hell can Mihoyo make a evil , psycho character like Scara playable....Childe is a special exception. But Scara not only has the motives to be like this but also many times now in both the event and the story that he is evil, and it might get worse if the leaks are true. Unless Mihoyo dose a FGO move and just makes a evil character playable no need to details or even a redeeming quality. Once again Scara only became popular because of the meme. Yeah his design is cool but we already saw a few example of amazing character designs and they are dead ! My only theory that might work for Scara is that we get to somehow reprogram him ? Since he is a puppet like the shogun. Personally it will be a bad move in terms of story telling to have Scara redeem himself in any way but if the devs managed to properly make him playable then i have nothing against it. 4. Racisms , misogyny , misandry, shipping etc. People are at each others necks when these subjects and genshin come together and hell that i will explain this here because i already lost to many braincells reading trough comments and threads but this time the most recent drama this is on the translations team's fault. Pretty much...we now have to travel to Sumeru to find the dendro archon. It all started whit Yae mentioning about a god of flowers named lesser lord Kusanali a female deity that right now is in charged of Sumeru. People already jumped the bandwagon and speculated that the dendro archon is in fact a female. I might do a separated post theory about that but in shorts...the translation team messed up big time because in previous dialogues when the dendro archon was mentioned, it was gendered as he but now and only now they change it to she....while in the Chinese version the dendro archon's gender was left ambiguous but that did not stopped the players to complain once again of the ratio between female and male characters and is far worse now that the Archon ratio is 2:5 now aka only Venti and Zhonlgi are the only male archons while the Cryo, pyro and Hydro are confirmed to be females. And people really hoped for the dendro archon to be male so that we can have the balance of 3:4. Seams reasonable and logical right ? But again i will not go any longer intro this. Case

in point...devs did a opsi and now people are at war. 5. The aniversary.....my dude FGO has the worse gacha rate up and a non existent pity system and yet they make better anniversary gifts than you. Phew this rant could have been much worse people i was yelling whit a friend about my frustration whit the genshin fandom and the stupid decision the devs are making so this was the most watered down version i was able to do. Again don't take my rant to serious. Things can still change either for the better or for the worse. If you still enjoy the game good on you. Everyone has the right to enjoy whatever they want as long as it not bothering those around them :3

[therandomfish]

A Babysitters Guide to Monster Hunting- A Randomfish Review

Did you like the remake of Ghostbusters where there were female Ghostbusters? Well then you’ll love the all female remake of Monster Squad... 

Is that accurate? Kind of. It feels like that right from a main character who believes in monsters, a villain who wants to bring together an army of monsters and of course sometimes the most random of moments. Although it isn’t an actual remake and it is it’s own thing want to make that clear. 

What’s the story? Kelly Ferguson (played by Tamara Smart)  is the kid at school who is apparently tortured by the kids of the town because she apparently saw a monster in her room and everyone just calls her “Monster Girl” oh and she skipped a grade because she’s smart, thanks to the exposition teacher (or maybe he’s the math teacher I forget) 

Okay first thing to dissect is this..... WHY?! Why are the kids still torturing her about THAT? First off these are teenagers there would be plenty of gossip around town I’m fairly sure and secondly this doesn’t appear to be a massively small town so this type of thing wouldn’t be as well known as it is! There is the generic bully girl played by Anisa Harris who just picks on her coz she’s nerdy and weird but... again this feels very pointlessly generic... haven’t we evolved our bullies since then? 

Kelly then gets’ guilt tripped to babysit her Mum’s boss’s kid because her Mum just assumed that she would be doing nothing ever and that she wouldn’t be trying to grow up and move on with her life like going to a party that was randomly announced in the hallway by some dude... I mean I can’t exactly say that’s it’s a bad scene either just convenient and to be honest if we sinned movies for being convenient then we’d just hate all movies (right CinemaSins?) and that the dude that is clearly the hot guy at school said he’d go and Kelly now wants to go in order to impress him and steal him away from Anisa Harris (yes the character has a name but she is so bland and forgettable why should I remember that character’s name?) but she goes to the boss’s house to babysit the kid named Jacob Zellman (Wow, I’m starting wonder if his mother is anyway related to Zelda or Hilda Spellman and just changed their names out of embarrassment) with the mother leaving behind a massive set of insane rules. However we learn that Jacob sees monsters just like Kelly did and while Kelly didn’t end up being taken by the monsters Jacob definitely does... okay now with the designs of the “Toadies” as they’re called in the film that’s not bad... what makes me laugh however with the rise of the villain of the film called Grand Guignol played by Tom Felton (yes THAT Tom Felton as if there’s any other) being a leader of some kind of boogiemen type of monster I began to wonder if we were about to get a modern take on the song “Dance Magic Dance” all of a sudden. 

We then get introduced to the films’ resident badass on a scooter (not a motorbike because that doesn’t equate badass anymore apparently) who is Liz played by Oona Laurence who turns up with all the information and starts essentially dumping exposition on us! From names of monsters to the book that she has to read to understand everything about the monsters and all of this completely cavalier while carrying a baby on her back. After chasing down one of the toadies they bring it back to their headquarters where we actually get an idea why the film is called this; A Babysitters Guide to Monster Hunting where we learn that apparently this organization has existed for hundreds of years. We see pretty quickly that the writer of the book also wrote the screenplay as he just says things while assuming that the people who’ve read the book are watching and everyone else be damned.... well I am part of everyone else and I say “No! You be damned for once!” We then meet our resident variety of side characters who will do next to nothing; Fat Kid (I mean  Curtis Critter played by Ty Consiglio), Cassie Zhen (played by Lynn Masako Cheng) and Berna Vincent (played by Troy Leigh-Ann Johnson) I say their names and characters now because to be honest they do a little behind the scenes stuff and try to give themselves focus but the crux of the whole thing rests on Kelly and Liz (who if you couldn’t tell from the attitude and the “hog” has a dark backstory) so they go off to get Jacob back who is being forced to bring his dreams to life which is why Draco Felton was trying to get him and why he was trying to get Kelly all those years ago too (yeah, that was a thing apparently Draco Felton has been stalking kids for years, there there’s an image in your fangirl minds about Draco Malfoy stalking kids) and so they go off to try and get a creature that can help them get the pieces together to take on and destroy Draco Felton and so they go to.... any guesses anyone? Yes you are correct madam it was the party that Kelly wanted to go to! They go there, words are exchanged, the boy that Kelly likes is confused but impressed I guess with the way she is as herself, generic bully is put in her place by Liz and, despite her saying that she wouldn’t go to the party while she was supposed to be babysitting Jacob there are videos on Instagram of her jumping off of a higher floor in someone’s home... that’ll look great Kelly well done also you wanna relax after jumping down a floor and landing on your face? No? Okay what do I know? They collect what they need and the nerd crew at the base (told you I’d forget their names they’re so forgettable those.... who?) make a device that Kelly can use to essentially punch Draco Felton to death (PUNCHING PEOPLE: As long as it’s monsters, it’s okay) they travel to a cat monster type person who traps them, LIz gets taken away by Felton and Kelly, who has been shockingly okay with this whole ordeal just gets up and heads for the lair on Liz’s scooter (sure she wont’ mind, at least fill up the tank you greedy whatsit) where we had learnt previously that Liz lost her brother to Draco Felton (see? Dark backstory) and he had hypnotized her with his lullaby even though we were shown that NEVER HAPPENING until we got to Liz so SCREW YOU MOVIE! Kelly snaps her out of it, they punch Draco Felton to death, Jacob is reunited with his mum just in time (Ferris Bueller would be proud) and Kelly begins her initiation into the Babysitters club and the ending is her looking at a book one of Draco Felton’s relatives, not going to the movies with a boy (because girl gotta save the world yo) and she’s feeling happy about this life of danger and madness she must now lead..... obviously this is baiting for a sequel, will it get one? I dunno we got a sequel to the Kissing Booth for crying out loud, something that didn’t need to happen in the least yet it did! 

So what did I think of it? Well it’s trying to be like the monster hunting, wise cracking monster kid movies of old, hence why I referenced monster squad but does that make it good? I mean the acting isn’t awful, Tom Felton does a pretty good job with that role and it did take me a while to realise it was him under the makeup. Tamara Smart and Oona Laurence were fine as leading ladies although Oona felt like she should have been older when playing this role, just to show the difference in age and to show what the life could do to you. As it stands it feels like when Molly Ringwald and Ally Sheedy meet in Breakfast club if they went hunting for Judd Nelson after he turned into a werewolf or something. 

But with all of it being said, this film was funny in places, tried to offer a sense of scariness that needed to go a bit further with it’s ideas 

I’d say a solid 7/10 (yes I do ratings) 

Please like this and let me know if there’s anything you’d like me to review next 

[thattimdrakeguy]

Tim hasn’t been himself in over two decades and people still think this version of himself is good.

Tim hasn’t been properly seen since 2003.

Ever since 2003, they started writing him different, drawing him different.

Like look at Pete Wood’s art during his Robin run, around the time Teen Titans the 2003 run came out, they started drawing Tim to look almost completely different.

Than they started making him more pretentious, arrogant, paranoid, generically brilliant, and a bit snobby even, because someone at DC, probably Didio, thought that just making everything really cynical would make it more interesting. When that’s what freaking 13 year old boys think.

After that they changed his costume to be more like Batman’s, very edgy in design and color pallet, but ya know at least the color pallet actually had a reason that made sense.

Killed his friends and some of his family to make sure his relatable, casual, realistically done and not over done teen angst, turned into bitter, frustratingly overdone angst.

Of course they had to change his identity as well. Make his outfit even edgier, and have him act even dark even though it’s out of character.

For the finishing touches, in the New 52, they right out of the gate made it seem like this was how he always was in this new universe, and then solidify it by changing his origin, and revealing he isn’t even the actual Tim Drake anymore.

Although, with the sales failing and all that, with terrible fan and critical reviews, they had to at least make it SEEM like they cared.

So back his origin came, but they still drew him wrong, gave him an edgier slightly more militaristic look of his classic uniform he had when everyone liked him and he was actually popular, to make sure that it seemed like they cared, but not quite, they still wanted to make sure it was passable to them.

So they kept that new paranoid, pretentious, mildly snobby attitude anyways, despite making it seem on the surface they brought him back. Gave him a story that’s supposed to be a sequel of sorts to his intro story, despite the best part of it being the freaking flashbacks to it, because we at least know he’ll be written well there.

But almost like a miracle, Wonder Comics was coming with what looked like Young Justice, almost exactly like how you remembered it, besides modernized costumes (that actually work for the characters this time). They were even drawn very well, maybe not Tim so perfectly at first, but even by issue 4 they nailed his look just right for him.

So all that good will. Gotta make sure that goes away. Tim’s drawn to look like Dick in the 80s if a bit skinnier now, make his costume atrocious, call him by his last name and call it the most dangerous bird when that doesn’t make any damn sense in a serious context, make sure he has no real actual personality besides bland leader man that knows Batman, and keep lapping him with his toxic ex-girlfriend that they can never freaking write right. So they can ruin it all anyway.

At most the art got a little better, with even John Timms stopping with the Dick look, but he still never drew him to look like his dang self. Scott’s showing promise, but after all this and remembering it. I’m not sure if I can get my hopes up even when I’m desperate for at least one person to do something right with him on that creative team.

Where has freaking Tim gone? I’m not sure.

But he’s disappeared in 2003, and no one seems to know where to find him anymore. Made a brief reappearance in the Adam Beachon run, but sadly he had to deal with some bizarre fake Cass imposter that didn’t act or talk like her at all, that they weirdly retconned away, but we all know that wasn’t the real Cass as far as actually meaning it goes. Then Tim disappeared again, and some miswritten, and misdrawn edgelord came back to take his role all over again, and then Robin was gave to someone else entirely. Miraculously he came back for the first 4 issues of Wonder Comics Young Justice, but even then, replaced by a misdrawn miswritten imposter shortly after that, and made sure to make it so he wasn’t actually Robin. Because who wants that? It’s not like Tim ever said he was happy being Robin while implying he didn’t wanna be his own hero. Gotta make him a c-list trash bag character so no one gives that attention.

It’s a very tragic story. Brings a tear even if you care enough, but it’ll never be correctly acknowledged by DC as of yet, because they aren’t even aware of what they actually did.

If they really wanna convince us that this character they keep calling Tim, and awkwardly shoving in the real Tim’s backstory for, is actually Tim. They’re going to need to do a better job than what they’re doing, because it really is pathetic.

If I can’t look at him and see Tim, or read him and hear Tim. Like is it really freaking Tim? Is it? Doesn’t even have the write identity, like cripes it’s pathetic. You’d have to be blind to believe that this Tim they’re passing off is really him.

I won’t even believe it until they actually do better, and start writing him and drawing him right again. Until then I’m not accepting this C-list rip off, they lazily gave the same name, and apparently origin to.

Awful, abismal work, DC. Just so bad a real word can’t even describe how bad it really is. Just awful, awful, stuff. You can smell all that burning garbage from here, and I don’t even live near any of the creative team or the DC headquarters. The stink that can be smelled anywhere across the world once they focus enough it enough.

P.U. ...

[earlgreytea68]

The Omegaverse Lawsuit

Everyone's been talking about the Omegaverse lawsuit recently, which is a little odd, since it was filed in September, but hey, sometimes that's how it goes!

It literally took me a little while to figure out that the names of the book series at issue here are Myth of Omega and Alpha's Claim. Like, I know this is meant to clearly signal they're Omegaverse books, but it just amused me to be talking about Omegaverse and not have it be a ficcy title. It really drove home to me how very, very different fic is as a genre from commercial original fiction, even when they're hitting the same tropes. 

The first thing to note is that the complaint is not a copyright infringement claim. Instead, the plaintiff, basically a writer named Zoey Ellis, is making allegations stemming from a copyright infringement claim against *her.*

The whole thing starts with a DMCA notice. Under the Digital Millennium Copyright Act, it's really easy for copyright holders to get allegedly infringing activity taken down: they file a notice. The website hosting the allegedly infringing activity is required by the DMCA to remove the allegedly infringing activity basically immediately. The person whose material has been removed is permitted to fight against the notice, but of course many people don't do that. It takes time, effort, and a knowledge of the law. For a lot of busy, sensible people, it's often not worth it. What this means is that DMCA notices are massively abused. We know they are. Theoretically they can only be advanced in good faith, however. So, if you can prove you've got a DMCA notice that was issued in bad faith, well, that could be a thing. 

Which is what this complaint builds around. It doesn't happen often, challenging a DMCA notice on bad faith grounds, but this complaint goes for it, which is impressive. And they allege a decent case because they allege a DMCA notice was issued for a book that hadn't even been published yet. Knowing an unpublished book is going to be copyright infringement before you've even seen it is a talent that you'd be smart to utilize on winning the lottery (if that’s what happened, of course). 

The plaintiff here did what you're supposed to do under the DMCA if you believe your work is fine and provided counter-notices. However, unlike in the case of the original notice, counter-notices can take months to process and resolve to get the works back up. 

As anyone familiar with fandom can tell you, rumors spread quickly. Once the word was out there that a DMCA notice had caused a takedown based on plagiarism, the allegations say that forums picked up on it, defaming the plaintiff's reputation. 

The complaint goes on to allege a pattern of the defendant Addison Cain manipulating social media for stars and reviews. I know we theoretically have standards for how stars and reviews happen, but, really, it's a dog-eat-dog world out there in book marketing. These are the examples in the complaint: 

Idk, if the DMCA notice claims are true, they seem sketchy, but these communications don't strike me as that bad. The truth is, it's hard to know as an author when you're going "too far." You need to educate people as to what's helpful algorithmically, and upvoting five stars and downvoting one stars is helpful. That sounds like what she's doing, providing information so people know how they can help a writer they love. Presumably anyone doing this would seem to care enough about Addison Cain's books to spend time doing this. It doesn't seem from these excerpts like she's bribing people in any way. The second example seems especially bland to me, like, the reader seems to ask if it would be helpful to mark it "not helpful," so the reader brings it up, and then in response to Addison Cain they seem to say that they're shocked anyone would find the review helpful, which seems to me to imply that their "not helpful" designation was a true reflection of how they feel. Surely encouraging truthful and honest behavior on the part of your readers isn't a bad thing, and surely we would not ask authors to explain to readers how to be mean to them, instead of how to help them. So, I don't know, this part of the complaint strikes me as a little weak. I just don't think asking for people who liked your book to review it as scandalous as they seem to think. Like, their exhibit is titled "Review Manipulation," and it includes things like this: 

(which, btw, afa I can tell, is her encouraging people to leave good review on *someone else's* book)

and

Idk, what do you think? Are you outraged by those? 

Moving on: 

This does seem ridiculous to me. She does seem to think that she was the first to ever write a M/F Omegaverse (which the complaint alleges is provably untrue), but also seems to think that she therefore influenced the entire genre to be exactly like her. Idk. This just makes me think, like, ::raised eyebrow:: Who goes around saying "Oh, you know why that's like that? They're all copying ME!" Idk.

(Incidentally, it's interesting that she's claiming to own the straight version of the trope, that the straight version of the trope is the unusual version, because romance is in the mainstream culture dominated so much by straight love stories, and indeed every love-story example in the complaint is a het example. They use "The Runaway Bride" as an example of an enemies-to-lovers trope, which was SO WEIRD to me, I stared at it and was like, ....but all of Harry/Draco exists???? lol)

Asserting that on its own, though, would just make me roll my eyes a bit and move on. Coupled with the DMCA notice allegations, however, it does make it seem like she's trying to claim ownership over the entire M/F Omegaverse genre.

The similarities listed in the DMCA notice do seem like pretty basic aspects of the trope that I don't think anyone can own. 

(There are more alleged. This is just the first few.)

But the DMCA notice does purport to contain reviews that say the two books are very similar. 

(Again, there are more, this is just a selection.) Part of me feels like maybe these people just haven't read much Omegaverse? Or haven't read fic, so they're not used to how tropes work? Idk. Without having read the books myself, it's hard for me to make this call. (And that's honestly how copyright infringement gets decided. You just have to read the books and decide if they're substantially similar in something copyrightable. Which apparently somebody did because the books were eventually reinstated as not infringing, it just didn't happen in a court of law. If this case goes on, eventually some judge is just going to have to sit down and read these.)

And of course the DMCA notice obviously chooses the most favorable to their cause, because there's also this: 

If the only similarities are the rules...that just sounds like the Omegaverse trope. 

The claims itself in this case are really interesting. It's not a copyright infringement case, because the plaintiff is specifically saying they are NOT infringing. Instead, the first claim is a copyright misuse claim (that you're using the monopoly granted to you by the government in an improper way, usually understood to be anticompetitive in a way that the government didn't contemplate as being part of the copyright grant). These are relatively rare but I think it's the right call, that using your copyright to send false DMCA notices would be copyright misuse. 

The defendant has now answered the complaint denying the allegations. Indeed, the defendant asserts that the complaint is defamatory because it alleges Addison Cain has only filed one other DMCA notice in ten years of being a published author and thus she has not repeatedly manipulated the system to shame other authors. It also includes a counterclaim that alleges basically that this lawsuit has been brought for harassment purposes because it’s expensive to defend a lawsuit and they alleged that online sales metrics tell them that at most Zoey Ellis has lost about $2000 worth of sales.

So that’s where the case stands now.

Other miscellaneous observations:

--The complaint has spoilers for the end of Alpha's Claim which tell me I would never read that book. 

--This is what the complaint lists as the common markers of the Omegaverse trope: 

--

You know, people in Omegaverse fics often grapple really hard with consent issues, and I love when that happens, and I'm sad that's obscured in this paragraph. I mean, I know the point of the complaint isn't to talk about the ways in which the trope can be subverted, but anyway.

I'm not a huge Omegaverse person, but one thing I do often enjoy about it is how stark it makes the sexism of our patriarchal society, that the gender that breeds is so devalued and treated as dangerous and cordoned off and loses agency, etc. And then how straightforwardly it often has to deal with that. And I know M/M Omegaverse often skimps on female characters but I also like how much it drives that point home, that it's not a man/woman thing, it's literally just that as soon as someone has to bear the children, that comes attached with all sorts of burdens and expectations. 

And I'm also not saying that every Omegaverse author sits down to grapple with those issues, or should be, or has to be. Just that Omegaverse can reveal so much about how we structure societies. And I'm sad that this complaint is just furthering this idea that fic doesn't really do anything profound or interesting or necessary and is just: 

It's cool, not all fic/writing/creativity needs to serve GREAT INTERESTS, nor should it, but also I think a lot of fic/writing/creativity does, and that gets ignored in favor of dismissing it as frivolous. Idk. Obviously this complaint is not about solving that issue, but it made me think about it. 

--

OR. Hear me out. They could get together and just cuddle for 100,000 words and banter and stuff. Just sayin'. Just throwing it out there. 

--

I'm honestly really annoyed by this paragraph's wording. It sounds so condescending. "Employed a degree of creativity consisted with other 'fan fictions.'" I hate those quotation marks around "fan fictions," like they're not sure those are a real thing. So-called "fan fictions" (which, who calls them fan fictions anyway? who are they quoting there lol). But also, like, what's the "degree of creativity consistent" language. Like, the standard for copyrightability is that it possesses a modicum of creativity. That's it. It's a low bar. We know the phone book doesn't have a modicum of creativity but almost everything else has SOMETHING. So this strikes me as a little...sneering and dismissive, like, "Well, it's just as creative as other 'fan fictions.'" No. It's creative. Fic is creative. This is creative. It's an entire BOOK, that no one is alleging copies anything other than tropes (AS ALL PIECES OF FICTION DO, THIS IS NOT A FIC THING). It's got plot, characters, setting, dialogue -- none of which are alleged to be copied. So, like, just say it. It's creative. It possesses a modicum of creativity. Move on. I have no idea why that weird "fan fictions" reference is in there, Idk. 

--They've got an exhibit that they claim is Addison Cain online statements about the plaintiff, but I can't make heads or tails of them. They're weirdness about how she's wrote the original M/F Omegaverse, but I don't see any references to the plaintiff author Zoey Ellis, other than very vague references like this: 

I'm a little bewildered by this exhibit. I think maybe they might be alleging that Addison Cain set up fake accounts to badmouth Zoey Ellis but if that's the case it's not clear to me, especially since they've blacked out the account name: 

--This complaint has an exhibit that's basically an expert witness on Omegaverse. I love this so much. :-)

--Let's just enjoy this being in a legal filing: 

--This isn't part of the main allegations. This is apparently, though, the kind of thing that Addison Cain has in the past considered plagiarism. Just a small selection, again, there are more. But:

I have long said that writing a sex scene is like writing a cover letter: You’re trying to convey a very narrow series of events, over and over, and there’s only so many words you can use to do it. So comparing sex scenes like this just doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. Sex scenes will mostly inevitably sound similar in isolated sentences like this. It’s so funny, I was just saying to Aja about a gif, “He’s arching his neck to give him access like every heroine in every romance novel.” Because that’s a line we’ve all read in every romance novel.

--

Honestly, honestly, literally every single Omegaverse fic I’ve ever read has this exact moment. (And many of them do it better.)

--This complaint has taught me a lot about how much of a kink some people have for being covered in days’ worth of caked-on semen, rubbed into their bodies and massaged into their hair. Really, the complaint is kink-instructive, I recommend it.

--Honestly to me the most damning thing about this is this exhibit where Addison took matters into her own hands to post the similarities between her book and another book, because I’m just not convinced by any of these, and if this is what she thinks copyright infringement is, then I doubt she understands what it is. Bull all these BTBB/TMO comparisons have been her making her case that these two books are similar, and I’m just dubious. And then stuff like this comes up:

Omegas being tired after a heat, yup.

They…both came up with a futuristic device that has a…screen?

She does end with this:

But I just don’t see what she’s claiming ownership of *other than* these really common Omegaverse tropes that I’ve read a million times. (Which isn’t to say that’s a bad thing. I’m a fic person at heart; I adore tropes.)

Anyway. That’s it. That’s the case so far. Let me know if you have questions, because lawyers can be bad at remembering what non-lawyers might be confused about.

In the meantime, I’m going to dig up some Omegaverse.

[mst3kproject]

403: City Limits

I only have one story about this movie and that’s how a while back I had a dream in which Kim Cattrall and Jennifer Connolly were trying to escape from an evil toy factory owned by Nicholas Cage, and in the dream I was thinking wow, City Limits is different than I remember.  Moving on.

In the non-dream version of the movie, a plague has killed off all the adults except James Earl Jones – I must admit, if you have to keep one he’s a pretty good choice.  He adopts some bland kid named Lee, who grows up, puts on a Cubone costume, and heads off into the ruins of Los Angeles to find other badly-dressed, motorcycle-riding survivors like him.  If he had any sense, he’d have stayed in the middle of nowhere with Horse Girl, since the first bunch he meets try to arrest him and the second just aren’t impressed by his resume.  Lee ends up killing some guy named Dirty Bob, so the various motorcycle gangs that now rule the world decide to subject him to trial by combat, based on something they read in a comic book.  Somehow this results in smashing a couple of dinosaur skeletons and uniting the gangs to take on the federally authorized Sunia Corporation, who shoot anybody who doesn’t want to work for them.  What the hell happened to Horse Girl?

Yeah, I have a lot of trouble following what is going on in this movie.  Most of it takes place in poorly-lit darkness, the characters all look alike and dress like piles of laundry, and nothing anybody does is properly motivated. There’s something almost Ed-Wood-ian about the way scenes in City Limits refuse to add up to a narrative. Reaction shots get dropped in with no explanation of why characters are reacting the way they are, and there’s some bits, like the Beer Santa or what Yogi sees out the window, that I honestly can’t tell whether they’re flashbacks or not.  It’s a good thing the narrating voice of James Earl Jones shows up from time to time to tell us what people are doing, or else I would have no idea.

What does the Sunia company want?  They say they want to provide electricity and food for the world, and if this is just a front for something evil we never hear about it.  Shooting people who won’t work for them is pretty evil, but if there’s a larger Evil Plan at work I couldn’t tell.  What do the Clippers and the DA’s want?  They might have had some kind of system of their own at work before Sunia showed up but all we hear about is the truce between the two.  What was Lee’s plan at the end?  Why bother having people zoom in on armored motorbikes if Albert was right there with the air support?  Why the hell is Carver the main villain when he never even gets out of his fucking chair?

Note To Self: if I ever want to conquer the world, I should avoid saying I am inevitable.  It doesn’t go well for anybody.

Maybe Sunia isn’t the problem, but the government that sponsor them?  Possibly, but we know even less about what passes for ‘the federal government’ in this dystopia than we do about Sunia.  We never meet anybody who represents them.  What kind of government can you have after almost everybody over the age of twelve died of the plague?  This is one of those things that, if the movie hadn’t brought it up, I would never have thought about it – but once they’ve mentioned it, it bugs me.

The impression I’m left with is City Limits is basically a sequence of ideas somebody thought were cool, with minimal effort made to string them together into an actual story.  Skull Helmet?  Cool. Motorcycle race through dinosaur bones? Very cool!  Biker Viking Funeral? Extremely cool!  James Earl Jones blowing shit up with RC kamikaze airplanes?  What could be cooler than that?  And yeah, all this stuff is fun to watch, but unfortunately that’s just not the same as actually caring about it.

Without coherence or character development to get us interested, the audience is left in exactly the spot Space Mutiny managed to avoid: we just don’t see the point.  The only real entertainment value in the film is a few moments of amusing absurdity sprinkled in here and there.  The fake-ass dinosaur skeleton is hilarious – as is the establishing shot of the museum, which looks extremely well-groomed for having been ruled by motorcycle gangs for fifteen years.  The stinger moment of Bolo hollering in panic as the dinky RC plane closes in to blow him up also got a laugh out of me.  Even these would be much improved, though, if we had a better idea what was actually going on.

Because of all this stuff stacked against me giving a shit, I had to watch the movie twice to get anything out of it.  On the second viewing, when I stopped expecting to understand what was happening in the plot, I managed to find a couple of interesting ideas peeking out.  One was how, here and there, City Limits tries to create a culture for these people who were abandoned as children.  Like the film itself, this is based on what a twelve-year-old might think looks cool: the clothes and lairs made out of scavenged bits of 80’s culture.  The party-animal, bike-riding lifestyle.  The use of comic books as a guide to what life was like before the apocalypse.  The weird funeral they hold for Whitey.  There’s a Trashpunk Neverland sort of vibe to the whole thing, as if we really are in a world designed by children who never grew up.  I wonder if that’s brilliant, or just a poor reflection on the maturity of the film-makers.

The other is an apparently earnest attempt to say something about colonialism.  Dr. Wickings (who the hell is giving out doctorates after the end of the world?) argues that the bikers are human beings who are just defending their homeland, and should be treated with compassion.  Her bosses at Sunia reply that the bikers are barbarians who need to be gotten out of the way.  This is the logic of everybody, everywhere, who has ever conquered anybody else. The Romans said it about the Gauls, the Spaniards said it about the Aztecs, the bad guys in Avatar said it about the Na’vi.  In each case, the conquerors who call the conquered ‘barbarians’ use it as an excuse to treat them barbarously.

This is stated explicitly enough in City Limits that it’s clearly intentional, and the analogy continues: Sunia has technology the locals don’t, and that could be of real benefit to everybody – but Sunia aren’t interested in peaceful trade or selfless charity, and the only benefit they want is for themselves (presumably, since like I said, their overall plan is never gone into).  The natives had plenty of problems and enmities of their own before this outside force showed up, but they had a system and it worked before Sunia pitted them against each other for gain (again, presumably).

As a theme, this falls apart in two places, both of which I’ve already mentioned.  First, we don’t care – we don’t know who these characters are and we can’t tell them apart, so we’re not invested in whether they get conquered or not.  I think the laundry-heap costumes are also a major contributor to this.  They tend to make all the characters look alike, jumbles of colour without distinguishable silhouettes.  Costuming can say quite a lot about a character, but if there’s too much going on the details get lost.

Second, we don’t really have a compelling reason to consider Sunia the bad guys.  I swear I know better now than to expect that MST3K cut anything that really mattered, but it was still kind of a surprise to find that there was no missing scene that detailed Sunia’s Evil Master Plan.  A supervillain with no Evil Plan is a pretty lousy supervillain, even if his non-evil plan is to be achieved by evil means, and especially when we don’t care about the victims.  We just don’t know enough about what was going on here before Sunia showed up to be able to say if it was better or worse in any way.  As it stands, Sunia’s offer of food, medicine, electricity, and an end to the gang warfare seems like a pretty good idea to me.

A couple more random notes that didn’t fit anywhere else in the review: since I work in that field myself, I have to say that I’m happy glasses survived the end of civilization.  It must be much easier to rediscover all the other technologies when everybody can see.  Maybe that’s why there’s so much gasoline and electricity in this post-apocalyptic world – people like James Earl Jones and Kim Cattrall with their glasses could see well enough to keep them coming!

Then there’s the fact that everywhere Lee goes, girls kinda smile awkwardly at him and then immediately take his side.  Horse Girl does it, Kim Cattrall does it, Rae Dawn Chong does it… why?  There seem to be lots of boys around, so it’s not like the apocalypse left the world with a shortage of dick.  This is why so-called ‘incels’ go on shooting sprees – because movies like this have told them that dull white boys should have girls all over them just because they showed up.

Seriously, what the hell happened to Horse Girl?  Why was she even in the movie?  She comes and goes before the opening credits are over and has no effect on the plot.  Did she reappear somewhere and I just never noticed?  That’s one of the big rules of storytelling, folks – if you place a horse on the mantlepiece in Act I, you have to use it!

[guardianofmemes]

fallout 4 companions best to worst

with funny images at the start of each character review! DLC companions included! also BIG TIME SPOILERS FOR FALLOUT 4 OKAY 3 2 1 GOOOO!

1. nick valentine - clockwork PI 

positives: he’s a robot detective who loves neon and smokes even though he has no lungs you know he’s a man who appreciates aesthetic.

negatives: none

2. old longfellow - old salty 

positive: grandpa time. he's perfect. this man is everyone's rough and tumble but supportive grandfather. he's a rough block of wood, well worn and with a sense of humor, drinking habits, great dialogue, fantastic personality and can follow you around, he never outwears his welcome. he can even follow you around the commonwealth. rivals nick valentine for best companion to me.negative: i can't really think of ANY.

3. codsworth - lovable orb 

positives: truly a stalwart companion, never abandons you, waited 2 centuries for the player character. it made me upset you couldn't romance them, the character who truly had a connection with you. they're fantastic and the top 3 was a REALLY close call.

negatives: cannot romance, wHY TODD YOU COWARD

4. preston garvey - minutemen general 

positive:  i can't even bring myself to post a jokey image for him he's just that good. god his character is good. he's a broken man, but he still doesn't stop helping others, or giving up hope. he's truly a good person, but not unrealistic. he has his limits, and can bend and break. and unlike other companions strangely, he DOES have more loyalty breaking points than the others, like if you side with raiders he will shoot you on sight. unless you deviate from the carefully curated quest paths in which case aaaaaaa also his backstory good, and i like how he faces his inner demons, altho i wish he'd just take the mantle of general. he honestly deserves it.

DOWNSIDES: ANOTHER SETTLEMENT NEEdS OUR HELP. making any companion a never ending, radiant quest hub, is a BAD FECKIN IDEA BOYO. BUCKO ITS A BAD IDEA. as a result of him being a radiant quest hub, its the onbly thing people know about him, care about, and experience while in game, because before and after every character interaction is something about his radiant quest hub quests. also romancing him feels HORRIBLE just like mac cready.

5. john maccready - ratface 

positives:  Positives, I like snarky mercs. And he had real Scout vibes.Honestly if you forget he existed in any other fallout games, on his own he's a decent companion. I like having him around, he's like that coworker of yours who keeps stealing office supplies but he always has spare smokes if you ask. honestly maccready is like if you dipped piper in the FEV. he's just a better version of her.  she's too heavy handed i'm sorry

negative:  again bethesda's bad design about being afraid of upsetting consumers. because once you finish his personal quest, spoilers getting the cure for his infant son's sickness, he should IMMEDAITELY RETURN TO HIS SON. WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE MAC AND CHEESE. GO RAISE YOUR SON. also romancing him just feels dirty and manipulative. this MAN IS CLEARLY STILL GREIVING FOR HIS DEAD WIFE!!!  most of the romance paths honestly feel dirty and manipulative to me, like you're taking advantage of their friendship and trust in you

6. Ada - actual wife 

positives: i love robots and this is like if curie didn't suck and wasn't born sexy yesterday. she has a character arc and is cool and has personality and also she's made of different robot parts when she starts out and that's cool. her story is good and even her generic lines are charming.

negatives: after the mechanist dlc is over she has no more unique cool things to say, and its sad they didn't prepare enough dialogue for her

7. john danse - paladin pants 

positives: danse is a trooper, he's a boot boy yeah. in literal apocalypse land tho, understandable. also he is loyal to his team and anyone he considers his friends. once he spoilers is exiled from the brotherhood for being a synth and loses his way he does lose some of his hangups, becomes a more thoughtful person. his character arc is good, i like how he ends up.

negatives: holy fuck my cat just jumped in my lap he's like my way or the highway haha. anyways back to pants paladin. like i said he has some hangups, aka his racism from living in the brotherhood, a proto-fascist military cult. but honestly this doesn't make him a bad character, and he does get better from it. i'm gonna be real here the only negative about him is again, THE ROMANCE PATH. IT FEELS SO NEGATIVE AND DIRTY AND MANIPULATIVE. like i see people say he's a bad character but no he's just a bad person. and even then, he does learn and adapt.you can have characters who aren't good people in your stories

8. piper - waifu bait 

positive:  extra extra read all about it, the tracer of fallout 4 not totally a bad thing tho, she's just.obviously the companion you're supposed to like the most.

negative:  her quirkiness has its charms but it can be KINDA much sometimes. also she’s obvious waifu bait. however in the end she's really more a person i'd want to argue with as a friend and hang just chill around she's pushy tho and i don't like being railroaded into certain quests or storybeats.

9. dog - dog 

positive: dog is dog

negative: is not robot detective or butler, but is still good

10. deacon - MY EYES!!! 

positives: charming spy man, so deep in the weeds he doesn't even know his own past or even if he's a synth. that's quirky and cute. he also has that very obvious spy charm of, his disguise is just him wearing clothes. iits funny like superman putting glasses on.

negatives: honestly he's just kinda bland. he's such a mystery wrapped in an enigma locked in a puzzlebox owned by that demon guy with the needles in his head, that there's nothing to know about him. really i can't figure him out. or get to know him.then again some of that is due to trust issues. i mean neat character trait but there's not much for me to consume here.

11. john hancock - anarcho beef jerky 

positive:  he's a pretty free wheeling kinda dude and i like that, he stands up against bad authority, to an extent, and that's where some of my issues crop up

negative:  it could also be blamed on shitty bethesda afraid you wouldn't do certain content if it locked you out of your favorite companions, but he'll stand with you through allying with the institute, the brotherhood, anyone. also his anarchist leadership style has resulted in a lot of issues for his community he doesn't seem keen on fixing or reflecting on anytime soon. also constant substance abuse and he'll encourage you to take on the party hardy lifestyle tooi just look at freeside i mean goodneighbor i mean freeside and i think "man you're supposed to be the king i mean the mayor you should do better". ripoff of the king i'm gonna rip off the bandaid tbh, not even as cool as the king. the king really looked out for freesiders while hancock kinda just... meanders about the place. being mayor with no authority on purpose just makes you, a guy who kills people sometimes.

12. automatron - build-a-bear workshop BUT WITH GUN 

positive: there's a few distinct personality modules and voice actors for the automatron companions, each one is enjoyable, i liked them, and they were all different from each other. i consider them like mini companions. plus being able to build your very own custom robots with any parts you want is the most epic part of this companion.

negative: the dialogue for the voice actor packs is pretty limited, like pretty limited. not a lot to hear before they loop. i'd have to say these are more neutral than even X6-88 for me

13. X6-88: oh that uniquely named courser that showed up as i destroyed the institute, wait he was a companion??? 

positives:

okay negatives time

negatives:for real tho he's just uh, again kind of a Nothing character. not as disappointing as Strong tho. As an institute courser he's just... well he just Is. he exists. doesn't really question his nature tho, or consider what life would be like outside the institute... its like if Danse had no character arc at all and spoilers just stayed in the brotherhood like a good proto-fascist feudalistic power armored boot boy. he feels like a quota like todd howard walked in the design room and said "we need an institute companion" and then the designers said "... fuck. we're almost done with the game's story okay lets cook something up". i'd have to say he's perfectly average. he's like the bland guy from the wendys commercials about how spicy their chicken is

14. porter gage - why do i keep stepping on this rake 

positives: his armor looks cool, and his voice actor is good. i like that a raider character is portrayed by a sneaky advisor type instead of just a chest beating tough guy on chems. porter is an interesting take, and his motivations and methods are interesting.

negatives: his motivations don't make sense though. he's seen over and over in his life that raiders simply are unsustainable and don't work, always breaking apart. yet he... still wants to be a raider, and advise raider gangs? it doesn't make sense. also if you buddy up with him preston will hate you, and you have to eliminate your OWN settlements in the commonwealth. sorry porter but i'm not willing to make that kind of sacrifice at all. he's alright as a character but not really deep. having a backstory doesn't mean you're deep, that's Bethesda Deep™. Bad, no. Die now with the rest of nuka world, gage.

15. strong - fallout 3 was a mistake 

positives: non-human companion, i like that. super mutants are always cool

negatives: lumpy and misshappen as fuck oh god he's like a slab of moldy ribs. also his character? what character? he's just a bog standard super mutant, not even a cool one from the west coast. he's just an orc, a raider painted green with half a brain and a penchant for eating people. he doesn't change or evolve, he's just. he's a Nothing character.

16. curie - born french yesterday 

positives:  so i guess i should start with the positives since that's a trend in this list now. positives! robot, and one that's both aware of how the world's dead but wants to learn, and make it better. i always like robots, and well. uh. robot. i'm out of positives now.

negatives: she is the living embodiment of th e born sexy yesterday trope. profoundly naive, yet unimaginably wise. and spoilers once she gets a SEXAYYYYY human bod from a braindead synth, her naive nature is played up even further as WHAT EEZ DIS STRANGE FEELING UWU I FEEL HORMONE AND LUUUV its bad, its bad its bad. french maid plus nurse wrapped into one, with the mind of a child, aka its the born sexy yesterday trope. and you can only fuc once she's out of the robot body and this makes betheseda COWARDS. LET ME HAVE MY ROBOTS.

17. cait - drug

positive:

negative: commit go away from my game. rude, not fun to be around, substance abuse storyline is NOT handled well. also in boston the one irish character is all fucked up come on man.

[blackbatpurplecat]

My Thoughts on Batman: Hush (the animated movie)

The story arc Batman: Hush from 2002 was one of the first Batman comics I have ever read and it quickly became one of my all time favorites. I would have given everything to get an animated movie based on it!

Then the adaptation of Batman: The Killing Joke came out and changed everything.

I had to take a closer look at recent DC animated movies and realized their glorious days had been over for a long time. I stopped wishing for an animated movie. One came out anyway. So was I wrong? Was this another loveless adaptation with stiff animation and unnecessary changes?

Right at the start, we see a closeup of Gordon’s hand and he’s wearing his wedding ring on his middle finger so... yup, I’m sure DC invested a lot of money in the film’s production...

I’m gonna assume we all know the comic’s story. We know about BatCat giving their love a try, that Bruce reveals his identity to Selina, that Catwoman pushes Lois Lane off the Daily Planet to help Supes break free from Ivy’s control, how Bruce’s childhood friend Thomas Elliot is killed, how Clayface is mimicking Jason Todd which triggers Batman, that the new villain called Hush actually is Thomas Elliot who had teamed up with Riddler, that Riddler knows who Batman is, and that Batman breaks up with Catwoman because he’s still having trust issues.

Let’s just say the arc is PACKED with story and characters so it shouldn’t be hard to make a movie out of it, right? Sure, I was expecting some changes because of its packed-ness. Not every single subplot and every single character would make the cut, I get it. However, I still wasn’t prepared for what DC turned the story into.

So what were some of those changes and what did I think of them:

- replace Killer Croc with Bane. alright, more people know Bane, it’s fine - replace Huntress with Batgirl. ugggggh, okayyy... more people know Batgirl. I feel bad that this choice removed Oracle’s existence but okay. she had one scene, you already had the character design from that godawful Killing Joke movie and not enough budget to make Huntress, I can see past this - cut Leslie Thompkins. hmmm yessss okay, she wasn’t that essential to the story, alright, I can live with it - cut the entire involvement of the League of Assassins. I’m not the biggest fan of Ra’s al Ghul and co. so I didn’t mind that they reduced it to one cameo of Lady Shiva. HOWEVER she is the world’s best fighter! WHY NOT SHOW HER FIGHTING?! she could have been so much better but they chose to waste her for exposition purposes - make Amanda Waller skinny. yes, they once again turned the baddest bitch into a skinny woman because we can’t have fat people in a Batman movie, no one wants to fuck a fat Waller or jerk it over a fat Waller -__- just get over yourselves, DC you assholes! - Robin was cut entirely. wow. just wow. why do DC hate Robin so much? I don’t get it! - the shit stain rape result popped up in one scene for absolutely no purpose except for poorly establishing a fucked up “continuity” between all recent DC animated movies. something NO ONE in the fucking world wants or needs. just kill that little shit, he serves no purpose, he was annoying as fuck, he wasn’t even created when the original story came out, fuck him, delete him, stop shoe horning him into every Batman-related thing, he’s useless - cut the entire Jason Todd part. again, why the Robin hate?! it was one of the most emotional parts of the story, why cut it?! - cut the BatCat scenes in the cave, including Alfred telling Selina that he thinks the world of her. no words except for “what a disappointment” - change the entire ending and make it worse. S I G H

So Thomas Elliot was just a red herring for everyone who’s read the comics. Instead of Hush having a personal connection to Bruce and having more complex reasons to kill him, we get Riddler who wants to kill him just because he can. Cool. But seriously, who thought that this would make a satisfying ending?!

Kidnap Catwoman, make her the damsel in distress, have Batman come save her, and kill the bad guy - sounds like a quality script to me...

But apart from the poorly written ending, I have a major problem with what the movie focuses on: the Batman x Catwoman romance.

A huge reason why I love the comic is the BatCat relationship. It’s the first time, Batman kisses Catwoman back, it’s Bruce willingly revealing his secret to Selina to include her in his ENTIRE life and trust her with his life. We see them work together really well, we see how Selina loves Bruce but also doesn’t give up her independence. She’s willing to be by his side but won’t turn into his sidekick or change into a to him more “convenient” version of herself. And most importantly, she understands and appreciates and loves Bruce for his moral code.

DC being DC, they of course only half-ass their biggest romance.

While I did enjoy the added BatCat footage like Bruce and Selina in bed (I LoVeD that Selina sounded like they had just had the wildest most erotic experience ever while she was still wearing a shirt and he was wearing his boxers and both Selina and Bruce looked stiff as boards o_O ), having breakfast together, sharing kisses, taking down thugs together, and just the entire pacing indicated that their relationship grew over a longer time period in comparison to the comic, the movie fucked up essential points which I won’t forgive.

Catwoman was portrayed as a murderous, reckless villain. There’s no way around it. It was HER who threw Lois off a building and Bats chided her for it (IN THE COMICS IT WAS HIS IDEA), he has to hold her back from scratching up a bad guy’s face, she cuts the line holding Riddler so he falls to his death (CATWOMAN ACTIVELY KILLS HERE), and in the end, she angrily accuses Bruce of being absolutely insane because he has a moral code to keep himself from becoming what he’s fighting against.

What the flying fuck?!

That ending pissed me off SO MUCH! In the comic’s story arc, Batman breaks it off due to trust issues and it did seem a bit rushed and irrational just to re-establish the comics’ status quo of “Batman has to be single” but it’s a SO MUCH BETTER REASON than what the movie gives us! Catwoman has no problem with killing (one of the reasons I hate Nolan’s interpretation of her) and doesn’t understand Bruce AT ALL, she doesn’t get him as a person, she doesn’t understand that he wants to SAVE and PROTECT. He sums it up quite well, if there’s a chance to save someone, he has to at least try. That’s the hopeful Bruce we rarely see because DC fanboys are all about grim gritty edgy brutal.

And then they part on “maybe we’ll see things the same someday” a.k.a. Catwoman hopes that Batman will someday have NO problem with killing. Fuck. You.

So in this movie, Selina was a reckless murderess, a damsel in distress, and of course willing to change herself for a man and not for herself. Big round of applause for shitting on Catwoman.

Alright, done with my rant on story-related shit. What else was there?

Yes, the additional BatCat scenes were nice as well as the interaction between Catwoman and Nightwing. Just Nightwing in general was awesome. A true BatCat shipper.

The dialogues were bad. Best example is the post-sex one.

I can’t say much about the music, it was so bland that I have already forgotten it.

The animation ranged from nice to fucking bad. They had clearly put more effort into the fighting scenes when the movements were fluid and smooth - and then you get back to stiff, dead characters and nothing moves on them except their mouths. I couldn’t help but compare the shots to the comic’s pages: Superman and Poison Ivy, Joker on the trashcan, the big BatCat kiss - they all looked fucking ICONIC in the books but so boring and bland in the movie, with a color palette that covered mostly black and gray. There was absolutely nothing memorable about the adaptation’s look and style.

(also: yes, we totally needed ivy kissing catwoman so all the fanboys have jerk material again and harley quinn’s costume reveals her shoulders now? what a mUcH nEeDeEd change to the costume, yes, well done)

Also the pacing was weird, there were SO many awkward pauses in-between dialogues. I cringed way too often watching this.

Which brings me to the voice-acting. Did DC have so little faith in one of their most iconic stories that they didn’t even bother to get Conroy + Hamill? I guess so. Once Upon a Time star Jennifer Morrison did a great job at being Catwoman, her voice was a really good choice! Also Sean Maher as Nightwing was a riot. Jason Spisak was a surprisingly good Joker as well as Hynden Walch as Harley Quinn - but how do you cast Tara Strong and NOT give her Harley?!

The biggest dud however was Jason O’Mara again. He has no range at all, he keeps his voice as monotonous as possible ALL THE FRICKING TIME. There’s no Bruce Wayne voice, no Batman voice, he just grumbles everything without any emotions behind it.

Well, I guess that was it. I could go into more detail about every single thing they changed but I think this review is long enough as it is already. ;)

Would I recommend the animated adaptation of Batman: Hush? Maybe. To me, it was an expected letdown because DC’s animated movies are almost on the same very low level of the live-action movies nowadays, so if you’d ask me “should I watch it?”, I’d say “if you like BatCat, yes BUT read the comic first and don’t expect too much from the movie.”

[bucreviews]

So I saw this movie today and here is my response to pretty much the only negative video review there seems to be.

Not seen Hop so I can’t comment on that comparison, especially since they don’t even talk about how it compares to Hop, they just mention it and leave it there, that opening is literally the only time it’s mentioned!

“I hope you like 90′s movies” well I do and I think many other people do, so I don’t really just that as a criticism. BTW it’s funny how he says that in the first 30 seconds and in over 20 minutes he never compares it directly to any movie from the ’90s. They mention Hop from 2011, Masters of the Universe from 1987 and Playing with Fire from last year.

“It’s 30 years too late” The games aren’t even 30 years old yet!

“A Sonic game would have killed around 2000” Maybe it would, but does that mean it wouldn’t kill now? The Sonic fandom is huge and has been for a long time.

“This is every bad 90’s kids film” And yet you fail to name a single 90s film that it is similar to.

“Sonic looks good enough, “passable” is the word to use here” Why? What more do you want from that design? Maybe not have his eyes be completely separate so he looks more like the design from the games, but other than that I don’t see what more was needed.

“The owl looks more like the original design for Sonic” Yeah he does, but he’s not on screen very long so I don’t think it’s a big problem.

“You’ve seen this movie a million fucking times” Maybe we have, but is that in and of itself such a bad thing? If it’s done well then it will still be worth watching.

“It jumps around between tones” maybe a little but it’s never too jarring.

“This film is a lot of 90’s cliches and that’s not what is fun about Sonic” but it is what fun about this type of movie, and the things that make Sonic fun, the running and fast action, are still in there.

“It’s a road trip and that’s not fun” I don’t know, I thought it was pretty fun in this film.

“It opens with a 90s trope of a freeze-frame and “I know what you’re thinking” Yeah it does…is that a bad thing? You guys are fans of Gravity Falls and  Ratatouille and they both open the same way, so clearly it can work when done right.

“And then it says 10 years later and I’m like “ten years later from what?” From when he arrived in the human world, why did you find that hard to follow?

“Haha they the thing, they called the town Green Hill” Yeah maybe that’s a little cheap but it’s pretty much the only thing like that in the film.

“Why not set this in the actual magical world of Sonic” Because the Sonic games that take place there have no story and it would have meant a ton more CGI the no studio would have been willing to give them the money for. But yeah maybe that would have been interesting, but how about instead of moaning about what the film isn’t, try looking at what it is.

“This is Master of the Universe film” which is NOT a 90’s film BTW

“Oh gives a fuck?” Well, maybe you will if you give the film a chance.

“The script was clearly written in the ’90s and not updated at all” Maybe it was, but just because the script is old doesn’t mean it can’t still work.

“No one was laughing at our screening” So what? Maybe they just weren’t laughing out loud, or just laughing quietly. I never came across as that kind of film anyway, Carrey’s style has always been that kind of comedy where you are quietly chuckling while he does his thing rather than “joke, laugh, joke, laugh,”.

“It’s not Carrey doing his normal Jim Carrey” I disagree, he felt like he was doing The Riddler from Batman Forever, which makes sense since he’s the bad guy in this as well.

“It’s not Ace Ventura” Nor should it be, since he’s playing the bad guy in this.

“There are very few laughs or cheer moments” Maybe not, but so what? Is that what you were promised or something? In my experience, it’s rare for a movie to have a big enough moment that the audience cheers, in the last year I can only think of one time that happened, that being Cap catching Mjolnir in Endgame.

“The audience perked up when the movie was over” well you are told to be quiet during the film, once it’s over people will start talking about the film a bit more.

“The comedy was never funny is was written for five-year-olds and idiots”, I don’t know if I really agree, the jokes were mostly just, thinking to yourself “oh haha” kind of funny. But they never made me cringe, there weren’t many low-end fart jokes (though there are some) and I never felt insulted watching it. I’ve seen kids entertainment in the past that either makes me cringe or just ask “what’s the joke there?” and this film really didn’t do that.

“Sonic spends the first half of this movie sad and alone” Which to me helps makes the second half more enjoyable when the spend and tone perks up a bit.

“If you don’t compare it to the games it’s just a bad movie” What’s bad about it? So far the only really bad thing you’ve pinpointed is the lack of humour, while also admitting that the kids were laughing.

“This stupid mushroom kingdom…Mario gave you a job, also Mario won” Does that mean he can’t still make fun of him? Also, I think that’s actually a reference to the Mushroom Hill Zone from Sonic and Knuckles.

“It’s just dull, bland flavourless mush” ok it certainly doesn’t push the boundaries of what you can do with a film, but does that mean what it does is bland. There is plenty of good action, comedy and the character are all fairly interesting. The worst thing you seem to be able to say about it is to do with things that are not in it.

“It’s not a family movie it’s a kids movie” I agree, it’s a kids movie that the adults will find perfectly watchable, nothing wrong with that.

“The adults won’t laugh” maybe not out loud, but I remember a few times I was amused.

“Let’s not do the games, let’s do something 30 years old.” Aren’t the games nearly 30 years old? But again the games have no plot, how do you make that into a story?

“It’s such a lack of imagination, creativity and effort” Sounds like the Nostalgia Critic over the last couple of years.

“The chase scene around the world was fun but it’s over so quick, you have the world, you can go anywhere!” But it would have gotten boring if it went on any longer, are you suggesting they go to over tons of locations just for the sake of it?

“This film aims low” I don’t think that’s such a bad idea for a first film. For a lot of people just having a good Sonic film on the big screen is enough. Keep in mind how many bad video game movie there have been, just the mere fact this movie avoids being another one of those is enough for a lot of fans.

“This has been done a million times and done better.” yet you can’t give me even one example of where that has happened.

“Why not have him run around with a kid and put him in Sonic’s world which looks more interesting?” I don’t really see how that would make for a more interesting story, but how do you know they won’t do that in the sequel?

“Our screen was only half full” Well maybe that’s why you weren’t hearing the laughs.

“All the positive reviews were saying it was for kids” which it is, you don’t need to read a review to work that out, that’s clear from the movie. But there is nothing wrong with that, the movie is still perfectly watchable for adults which is more than I can say for a lot of kids movies.

“Kids deserve more” and they will get it, this movie isn’t stopping that.

“People seem to just like the fact it made it to a movie” Well given it’s his first ever movie, is that really surprising?

[bluephoenixdruidicprincess]

SPN 14x19, Jack In The Box -- Review

We're getting there. We're almost at the finale, I can hardly believe it. It feels like season 14 only just recently started airing but yet, strangely at the same time, it feels like season 14 has been going forever. While I can definitely say that season 14 hasn't been my favorite season, it most certainly has been taking me on a wild ride. This week we have 14x19, Jack in the Box.

There will be spoilers so maybe don't read this if you haven't seen the episode.

I do want to say right off the bat that the episode name, "Jack in the Box" while a perfect title for this episode, it also completely spoils the episode before you even get into it. I didn't even need to watch the promo trailer (which I didn't) to know that this episode was going to surround the idea of Jack being stuffed in that malak coffin. But that's neither here nor there. Just a casual observation. I'm not really complaining about it, just simply stating that it's not exactly rocket science to see the title of the episode and make a somewhat accurate conjecture on what's going to happen.

Let's begin with the episode starting off with Mary's "wake" I guess. I'm assuming these extras are meant to be a mix of the regular hunters and the au!hunters that survived au!Michael. Everyone's having a good time reminiscing about Mary and then out of nowhere an axe flies killing one of hunters and it's revealed that the killer is au!Bobby and the hunter he killed was actually a wraith in disguise. And this scene, the tone of the scene, it was a little weird. For one thing, it takes a while before it's made explicit that au!Bobby killed this dude because he was a wraith. I want to say the scene goes on for about 10-15 seconds before they make it clear that au!Bobby was killing a monster and not one of his own and 15 seconds is an eternity in film practically. It was kind of jarring and then just seeing everyone not even blink an eye, just an, "hey, how are you, Bobby? Glad you could make it. Thanks for sticking that axe in that dude's nagen." I do have a certain amount of respect for that wraith, though. Going into a hunter headquarters full of hunters to gloat over another hunter's death...while not necessarily classy and somewhat ill-advised and stupid, I gotta respect the dude's guts. I'm sure the dude's having a grand old time in Purgatory now. Dude was clearly not one to shy away from a fight. But anyway, before, I mentioned how this moment was kind of jarring. And I'm thinking perhaps by design for the sake of symbolism and foreshadowing. We got a monster in the headquarters of hunters so I can see that as symbolism and foreshadowing that there's a monster in our heroes, as well. Throughout this episode we've seen our heroes grappling with things that are bad and could be considered monstrous by their own standards. We have Jack sinking further and further into darkness, basically letting the monster within take control even if it is through Dumah's manipulation. Then we have Sam and Dean grappling with betraying Jack, something neither of them are comfortable with. There's Cas killing Dumah and for Cas, he doesn't take killing angels lightly considering the immense guilt he already harbors towards them. Au!Bobby deciding that finding a way by any means necessary to take Jack off the playing field could be seen as letting the monster take over, as well. And then there's another angle to think about in which au!Bobby killed the monster hiding amongst the hunters which is interesting to think about as his aim is to kill Jack who's technically a monster living amongst hunters. And it also leads into the idea of Sam and Dean taking the same approach with Jack.

And while we're on the subject of Mary's wake, there was something I noticed in that scene where it felt like Dean's body language was very closed off to Cas. When he's giving the speech about how great Mary was, when referring to Mary as a mother, his gestures are always open to Sam but closed off from Cas despite Mary viewing Cas as a son and "one of her boys". So obviously, things are still a little tense between Dean and Cas. I'm not really looking to get into the "you're dead to me" drama here. I'll do that in different posts if I so choose but for the sake of this review and my commentary on this episode, I thought it was worth a mention and was wondering whether anyone else picked up on that.

In this episode, we have Jack getting some more bad advice from Negative Jack which ultimately leaves him quite vulnerable to emotional manipulation by Dumah. And Jack is super relatable in these moments, too. Technically, Jack is only two-years-old but emotionally, I'd say he's probably around 10 or 11-years-old. Emotionally, he's at an age where he wants to be included with adults but still lacks the capacity to make decisions based on his own self and instead he's doing whatever he thinks will make his family happy. It's really easy to be manipulated at that age. You want to hang out with the big kids but you haven't quite figured out that there's a whole new set of rules to hanging out with the big kids.

And Dumah's betrayal actually does make a certain amount of sense. She's the first angel that really showed much of an interest in Jack. She was the first one that really made it known that she saw a use for Jack. She was the one who first mentioned using Jack to create more angels. I haven't really talked that much about Mary's death being a conspiracy. I really just wanted to wait and see but Dumah's actions in this episode kind of lends a lot to that. It doesn't make complete sense because if she was the mastermind behind this why did she wait to talk to Cas before making her move? She clearly could find Jack reasonably quickly (I'm not sure how, but whatever) so why did it take her so long to do the initial search if this was her endgame? Or maybe it's a conspiracy on Billie's end? I'm still kind of side-eyeing her introducing the idea of the malak box when ultimately it wasn't necessary despite her telling Dean it was the solution that allowed everyone to live. Once again, I'll bring up my idea of Billie as an unreliable narrator. I'm certainly not calling Billie a villain or anything, but she is a character with her own agency and her own set of goals and it's important to note that while she may be willing to work with the Winchesters if the occasion calls for it, they have a business relationship with each other not necessarily a friendship one. She's playing the cards to get her own job done, what she feels is productive to this universe.

So I loved the confrontation scene between Cas and Dumah. As I mentioned before, a little bit of symbolism linking back to the beginning scene but I also saw Dumah as a mirror of Cas. A mirror of who Cas used to be. Season 6 Cas with sprinkles of Season 8 Cas. Dumah is all about trying to save heaven much like Cas once was and she isn't too choosy on how she goes about it. And then there was the threat on John and Mary very similar to Cas breaking down Sam's soul wall and telling Dean that he'll save Lisa and Ben if Dean supports his plan. So throughout this scene, Cas was basically looking at a previous version of himself, a side of himself that he hates and the scene culminating in Cas killing Dumah paints a clear picture, at least in my reading, of Cas killing the previous version of himself and perhaps paving the way to him forgiving himself. He certainly hasn't forgiven himself yet but symbolically, I think was a step in that direction. And also a nice parallel with trying to protect his family. He wasnt going to let Dumah do that to John and Mary so it's interesting when at the wake he came off as feeling like a little bit of an outsider of the group who wasn't necessarily being seen as one of the family, and then doing this to protect the family he was being treated as if he didn't belong to.

I'm going to refrain from talking about the whole manipulating Jack into the malak box as I fear I might get a little critical of Dean as a character if I try and do that. Truthfully, I've been somewhat quiet in these reviews in regards to Dean because I just want to wait and see where he ends up at the end of the season before I start really talking about his actions in these past couple of episodes. Needless to say, I understand why he's reacting the way he is but at the same time, it doesn't make it right and I'm not going to make excuses for him and I hope the show does something in which he acknowledges it and grows from it. And also, regarding the Malak box, they couldn't have made it a little bit comfortable for Jack? Throw a pillow in there. A blanket. A book to read? A stuffed animal he cherishes? You know something to make him feel like he wasn't being abandoned.

And locking away your problems in a cage, in a box? How very Chuck-like of the Winchesters considering that's what they got on Chuck about in season 11. If Chuck really is going to make an appearence in the finale, that would be an interesting conversation to have. Perhaps the Winchesters are seeing a little more from Chuck's point of view.

Well, I think that's the end of my ramblings. I hope you all enjoyed it. I certainly enjoyed this episode. Not bad for a BL episode. It could've been way worse but it was quite unlike BL to have such a grounded episode, it kind of took me by surprise. But I did feel like this episode's dialogue and directing was a little bland. Nothing very memorable in the cinematography or musical score. I'd give this episode a B-. It's enjoyable, it kept me interested but it's not something I really have any compulsion to return to.

As always tagging my friends @metafest to weigh in if they so choose. We got the finale next and I'm super excited to see how this season leaves us.

[pkmn-fangamer]

Pokémon Gaia Review

Intro:

Hi guys! This is my first Pokemon fan game review. Hopefully there will be many to follow! Thanks so much for taking the time to read this. If you want to skip right to the review part, you can scroll past Description and How to Play. If you want any more details on the game that I don’t cover here, feel free to send me an ask! Also, if you have any games you’d like me to review, feel free to send in requests as well.

Description:

The storied Orbtus region was once populated by a prosperous civilization. They created several monuments to their gods and guardians. Their untimely demise was brought about by a series of disastrous earthquakes; all that remains of their society are their temples, idols and story, as relics of the past.

In the present day, local archaeologist and Pokémon Professor, Professor Redwood, has noticed an increase in the region’s seismic activity. Propelled by a growing concern for Orbtus’ safety, he seeks the assistance of new Pokémon Trainers with a flair for adventure in the rural Celanto Town, a seaside town near the mysterious totem poles, and your home! Will you, along with the help of the Professor and your rival, be able to prevent the earth from consuming the region once more?

How to Play:

To play Pokemon Gaia, you’ll need to download a few things. They are Visual Boy Advance, Pokemon Gaia (V3.2), Pokemon Fire Red, and NUPS. I highly recommend watching this video, which contains links to all these necessary pieces in the description and teaches you exactly how put them all together.

Story:

From my first few minutes playing, I could tell that the story in this game would be fairly put together. It seemed to have a lot of potential, being based on the Regis and having ancient roots in regional history. However, I feel as though the story didn’t live up to its full potential. It wasn’t horrible by any means; it just could have been better. For the most part, it feels a lot like a standard main series game story.

The overall story is very formulaic. You have your silent protagonist, kind of bland rival, professor named after a tree, an evil team called the New Elders, etc. None of the characters are particularly memorable to me, but none of them are particularly bad either. One particularly interesting surprise was a character from another region in a leadership role- that’s the most I’ll say about that, though.

Overall, this story isn’t the best one you’ll ever see in a Pokemon, but it gets the job done, and serves to be fairly interesting.

Score: 7/10

Pokemon:

I’ll begin with the selection of starters. To my pleasure, the available ones are the Sinnoh starters, which feels right for this game. I’ve also never seen another fan game with solely Sinnoh starters before, and I’m partial to the Sinnoh region, so this was a pleasure for me.

The range of Pokemon available in this game is amazing. There are Pokemon included up to and including Gen 6, with every mega evolution. One person playing this game will never have the same team as another- there are just so many options right from the beginning. Just from the first three routes and towns, you can seriously build a decent team of six Pokemon. Or you can wait like I did and pick up one Pokemon at a time along the way.

One thing of note that I appreciate is the availability of all types of Pokemon, and it’s clear that there are specific areas in the game dedicated to most Pokemon types. Notably, ice type Pokemon are available in a relatively early part of the game. No main series game offers ice types before the fifth badge, whereas ice types are readily available directly after your second gym battle.

Score: 10/10

Gameplay:

The overall difficulty of the game is medium-high. I’d compare it to Gens 1-5; it’s definitely harder than 6 and 7. Trainers frequently have Pokemon about the same level as you, or only a few under. I did have to do some grinding and was actually beaten by my rival a couple of times. However, grinding is easy with the speed up button since this game is played on Virtual Boy Advance. I’d also like to note that I was pleasantly surprised that the grunts of the evil team are actually a bit stronger than the average trainer you’ll battle. This really helps bring the New Elders to life as an actual threat.

Additionally, there are several nice additional touches that really help bring the Orbtus region to life. Almost every NPC you talk to actually has something meaningful to say; they’re packed with optional side quest offers, items to give out, Pokemon to trade, and offer a wealth of information about the history of the region and local towns.

Like a normal main series Pokemon game, Gaia includes a normal eight-gym circuit, and each gym has a simple, yet unique gym puzzle that is fun to solve but not overly difficult.

The biggest deficit to me was the appearance of HMs. Like Gen 6 and earlier, HMs are not only present, but required to get around the game and find hidden places and items. For older fan games I would not count this against the creator but being that this game was finished after the release of Alola, I think this game could have been better without them.

8/10

Art/Music:

The art found in Gaia is truly reminiscent of Gen 3 games Fire Red and Leaf Green, with a decent number of maps being mostly made of these tiles. As the game went on, more areas used original tiles. There was a desert area, a farm-based area, a canyon, and so many different environments. However, one thing that I really didn’t like was the lack original design when it came to the evil team. The grunt design was imported directly from BW2, and the overworld sprite for the team leader is the old lady one from FRLG that may be slightly edited.

One of my personal favorite cities is Windmist City, which is a snowy city far north similar to Snowbelle or Snowpoint. The weather there is constantly snowy, and the snow is well animated. It’s neat to see a snowy town in Gen 3 graphics. The NPCs in Windmist are also unique, dressed in coats and drawn distinct from the default NPCs from FRLG. Another interesting city is Telemurk City, which was run by a gang, and reminded me of a more put-together Po Town from Alola.

Overall, the music is passable. There are few original tracks, with most music imported directly from FRLG. My favorite original track is the Elder Nights admin theme. I would have enjoyed more original tracks, but I do prefer this if the alternative could have been badly composed music.

Score: 7.5/10

Misc:

This isn’t a rated section, but it’s nice to know what kind of community support you’ll get going into a game. Unfortunately, while there is a decent amount of people that enjoy Gaia, there isn’t a big fandom presence. There’s only a partially filled out wiki with some not-so-reliable information, which was disappointing to me. However, there are some google sheets of helpful info that you can find in the discord channel.

I’d also like to say that while the story of this game is finished, a new version is set to come out, which should give Gaia some post game content.

Overall:

After only visiting a few of the first towns, I noticed something about Gaia that’s hard to find in a lot of fan games: a polished final product that is truly similar to a main series game. I can’t find single grammatical, language, or graphical error in the whole game, which significantly contributes to the feeling that this could be a main series Pokemon game.

All in all, I did enjoy playing this game, and would recommend it- especially to someone that really wants a game that doesn’t deviate from the Pokemon Formula. In terms of where I’d rank it among Pokemon fangames, I’d put it in the upper middle of the pack. I would rank it higher among fan games, but it lacks a sort of wow factor that the very best fangames have. Everything considered, this is a solid game that’s definitely worth a play.

Final Score: 8/10