#I MEAN growing up in the cult is still bad. but it wasn't as bad as Leandro's imagining

[mourningmaybells]

like I don't think leandro should have a rivalry with claudio, but Leandro spent years thinking all that he received and that was withheld from him, the only child they had to take care of, was all the love Aciano and Siyon-Elissa and everyone else was capable of giving. Seeing Claudio exist the way he does (in a villa, with a wife, with a now-dead mother and father who loved him and only him) is like an abberation of reality, and it's bringing him to the brink of a nervous breakdown. It's not so much hate, but being incapable of ever processing his existence, and so Leandro quietly pities Claudio for whatever he went through, but really it's all in his head.

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

Hey

Want to know your opinion, how would you improve some arcs of toh characters, like Amity, Hunter, Lilith, Willow, Gus and probably anyone whose arcs you think are bad-written?

good question! let's see,

luz: i have mostly no complaints about her character but i wish they made it clear that her running off to the boiling isles was not ideal. i don't entirely blame her because she was a child and she was looking for a way to avoid going to camp, but the show starts off implying that luz's escapism was a bad thing, but then they kinda contradict that in the end, by letting her have access to the boiling isles forever.

also her s3 arc with her palisman was just overall poorly written. it was supposed to be an emotional and wholesome moment but it didn't have that impact on me. if luz's greatest wish was to be understood, they should have built on that more. i mean, it's not like no one understood her, all of her friends and found family in the boiling isles seem to understand and empathize with her. it just felt like the writers pulled this revelation out of their asses, and the fact that stringbean was inexplicably a shapeshifter didn't help their case.

amity: i would keep some parts of her initial characterization, like her ambitious nature and her resting bitch face energy. even if the idea was to make amity grow into a more cheerful person, it doesn't make sense that it happened so quickly. imo her characterization was at its best when she was warming up to luz but not entirely nice to other people (like during the grom episode). i really liked her cold, standoffish behaviour and i think it would have been nice if she had kept some of that, while still being a better person than she was in the beginning.

also, like i said in another post, she should definitely have goals of her own. her character shouldn't have been reduced to "luz's girlfriend". i would definitely show more of her interacting with the other characters (and these interactions and conversations aren't about luz) and pursuing her own dreams. i think steven universe did this best where connie liked steven a lot and she did hang out with him, but she also had her own life and her own dreams to chase.

hunter: i wouldn't put him in a relationship with willow, or anyone, for that matter. the poor boy has a lot of trauma he needs to work through and based on the stuff that he's said, it's clear that he doesn't know how healthy human interactions work, let alone a romantic relationship.

i would make his arc about slowly healing through his trauma or at least being able to express his emotions, instead of suppressing them for willow's sake. i think it could have been done, despite the time crunch. he needed time to grieve flapjack, to grieve himself after being possessed and almost killed by his abuser, and to slowly start his healing journey.

the others would definitely support him through it, but that's what he needs at the time, not a badass girlfriend.

lilith: i think her redemption arc started off okay but then everyone forgave her too quickly. it wasn't as bad as catra's because lilith did put a little effort into trying to be better, but she still needed to do more before she could have been forgiven.

so either i would extent her redemption arc and let the other characters, especially eda, stay mad at her a little longer before she gets forgiven. or i would just keep her as an antagonist.

they didn't even explore her trauma of being in a cult and the emperor's coven never chased her down after she left. not to mention, her experience of being in the emperor's coven is never relevant to the plot. she could have given luz inside information or talked about belos' potential weaknesses, it was such a missed opportunity.

willow: her arc with amity was not terrible and i like that she was allowed to take her time to trust amity. this is more about amity than willow but i think it would have been nice if we saw amity making more efforts to gain willow's trust. her apology in understanding willow was good but they kinda glossed over the fact that amity wasn't just "letting her friends bully willow", she was also bullying willow.

i think we needed more of willow and amity trying to mend their friendship, instead of lumity being the main focus after that one episode.

and in general, willow deserved a bigger role in the series. for the longest time, she was just luz's friend and then they forced her into a relationship with hunter, which did not work at all.

if her intended arc was to work on her insecurities and get more confident over time, they should have shown more of that process. even Any Sport In A Storm was mostly about huntlow (and hunter, to some extent) then willow. and let's be honest, the whole "half a witch" thing was dragged out more than it needed to be.

gus: okay, buckle up because i think i have the most grievances with gus. i need to make this clear. GUS WAS SO UNDERUSED.

i'm sorry. this guy is a child prodigy who can create illusions and use illusion spells to look into people's minds and force them to relive their worst memories?? why was this not more relevant to the plot? gus is such an insanely skilled witch and yet he's always pushed to the back for some reason. he has the most versatile and useful skillset but he never gets to use it, it makes me so mad!

even him looking into belos' mind was only used for that brief moment where he admits that he knew hunter was a grimwalker, but didn't want to force hunter to talk about it. that's it. we get no further conversation about it, gus never addresses the other stuff he saw in belos' memories like him MURDERING his brother and creating all the grimwalkers and god knows what else??

also just the fact that he's able to psychologically torment people with illusions is such an OP move that the series just kinda glossed over. it was used in a few episodes, but it could have been used to a greater extent. i just think that gus could have been such an interesting and powerful character, if he was given enough spotlight.

he also had a good thing going with mattholomule but instead of making that canon, they went for huntlow. i'm not saying that gus has to be in a relationship (or any of them, for that matter) but why create a new rushed ship when you already have a perfectly good one to work with?

i also find it weird that gus and willow were supposedly best friends but we got very few moments between them. i would have loved to see more of their friendship, and more focus on platonic relationships in general.

so yeah, if i were to rewrite gus, i would definitely give him a lot more spotlight. heck, given his powerset, he has the potential to be the main character even!

belos: i've mentioned it a lot before but belos deserved a more climatic end to his arc. all of the implications of religious trauma and puritan culture was thrown in the trash in s3.

he was actually such a compelling villain, genuinely intimidating and with an interesting motive and backstory. what was the point of crafting such an interesting character, just to be like "lol he's evil murder his ass"?

i'm not even mad that he died, i'm just mad that THAT'S how he died. i was expecting his death to be something ironic and self-inflicted, like the people from the human realm being horrified by him and killing him. maybe even burning him to death, the same way witches were burned at the stake. buuuut no, we get king, raine and eda stomping on his corpse because haha that's funny. hunter didn't even get to be a part of all this, and he was the one who deserved closure, he was the one who deserved to see his abuser face consequences of their actions, not fucking eda and raine.

and that part where he tries to convince luz that he was just under a terrible curse was just.. so childish. and not in-character childish, but just childish writing. it was just so ooc for belos, he is a manipulator but this wasn't how he manipulated people. i guess you could argue that he was just too desperate to survive but eh. i think it could have been written better.

eda: i don't have too many complaints here, i think she was probably the most well-rounded and compelling character in this show. her arc about the owl curse was interesting and very relatable to me, as someone who is epileptic. her relationship with raine was the best in the series imo.

the only thing i would change is, as I mentioned earlier, i wouldn't make eda forgive lilith so easily. i also think that she kind of lost her "morally grey parental figure" edge by the end of the series, and i honestly liked that part of her a lot, so i would keep it. but that's just a personal preference.

raine: they were definitely a very interesting character, i just think they deserved more screentime. most of their role in the story was surrounding their relationship with eda, which was very compelling, but we could have gotten more of their character outside their relationship.

the members of the emperor's coven, as a whole, could have been used better in the series. but for a side character with medium relevance to the plot, i'd say raine was written pretty well.

[chowplanet]

So I'm going to make another rant this time for Jackie Bouvier Kennedy Onassis. Enough with the corny, "she eats metal sheets," meme of Jackie. Okay, we all know she wasn't super gorgeous like Jessical Alba or Scarlett Johansson level, I get it. Jackie's teeth does remind me she drank coffee and smoked a lot. This lady has been through so much in her younger years. She lost three children before JFK's assassination. If JFK Jr. died before his mother on the plane accident she would have witnessed four of children's deaths. We all know she grew up rich and privileged, so she isn't "relatable" like Marilyn Monroe. This doesn't mean Jackie Kennedy never dealt with problems growing up. There are rumors that she was possibly a racist all because she didn't liked her wedding dress which designed by a black woman, but how come no one is mentioning Jackie invited a black female opera singer to the white house to perform when the black female opera singer was struggling financially? I know it's Marilyn Monroe's cult worshippers dissing and roasting Jackie Kennedy on a daily basis. But let me tell you this Jackie Kennedy had the right to be upset at both her husband (JFK) and Marilyn Monroe. It takes two to tango and Monroe knew he was a married man. Sophia Loren, Barbara Eden (I dreamed of Jeannie), Trippi Hedren, Olivia De Havilland, and Jean Simmons all rejected or decline JFK because they were aware he was married. He wanted to hook up with them, and those ladies all turned him down. So please do not come to me by saying Marilyn Monroe was 100% a victim when clearly she wasn't forced to have an affair with the president and his married brother (RFK). I also want to give Jackie major props for telling Marilyn Monroe on the phone since she kept on calling the White House and bragging to Jackie that she was going to steal her husband. Jackie didn't backed down nor was intimidated. She hold her posture by telling Monroe she can move in to deal with the problems while she moves out and does not have to deal with being a Kennedy wife or a first lady anymore. I say Jackie was ballsy. That was so gangsta of her. That was one bad ass first lady besides Eleanor Roosevelt and Dolly Madison. This woman has to witness her husband getting shot right next to her while her pink suit is dreaded with his blood and his dead body on her lap all the way from Dealey Plaza to Parkland Hospital. After that she has to take care of two children. She has to move out of the White House very quickly around the Thanksgiving holiday. So people saying she isn't strong enough or smart enough (Jackie spoke five different languages) is absurd. I don't think some people would be in Jackie's shoes especially the ones who are saying she wasn't a strong woman. People are also going in on her because she wasn't some kind of a Hollywood actress like Monroe. I don't think Jackie ever gave a (bleep). She didn't care about that Hollywood lifestyle, nor she cared Marilyn is a Hollywood icon. One thing for sure Jackie is not going to kiss certain people's butts just because they have that title. I like her punk attitude that she didn't care for celebrity worship culture. People are really giving Marilyn a pass because she was a blonde and blue eye Hollywood legend. Enough is enough. JFK and Marilyn were wrong. Jackie could have been killed on November 22, 1963. She was right there next to her murdered husband. And no one seems to care because she wasn't "hot and fine" enough. It is crazy to find out the last thing JFK saw was his wife's face before before getting shot in the head. Hopefully in the afterlife he thought about the things he put Jackie through here on earth. That he really had a good woman in his life. Sad just sad.

And by the way, I've noticed people are mocking JFK's death more often compared to Abraham Lincoln. I don't know because Lincoln is more respected (which I love how he is still respected to this day) or is because some enviousness is going on around here. Whatever it is stop with the corny JFK's jokes about his head exploded. Idk but it's giving jealousy and envy. Maybe it has something to do with he hooked up with Marilyn and other people wish they were in his position to do so. Whatever it is, stop with the mad corny jokes it isn't even funny. I'm talking to you Reddit users, TikTok, YouTube, and Instagram users.

[spoiler-alert-andabunchofnumbers]

Let's talk about Tidus and Yuna, shall we?

As someone who enjoys FFX, this probably should have come a long time ago. Tidus and Yuna's characters in the original Final Fantasy 10 are excellent.

Tidus successfully portrays a seventeen-year-old boy in this fantasy situation - slightly annoying, slightly arrogant because of his famous father and his own famous Blitzball career, and utterly overwhelmed by being thrust into an entirely new world without knowing if he can go home.

While FFX tries to fake you out into thinking it's a time-travel story where he has been thrust 1000 years into the future, the city of Zanarkand is a physical location in Spira that just requires you to be made of pyreflies to enter (aka dead or a summon). This makes Tidus essentially a summon, which is an interesting theory for another day. This means Zanarkand is just a place that hasn't changed in 1000 years, likely in some infinite loop imagining and reimagining people who had once lived there - warping them slowly over time, but ultimately just trying to keep the city alive (which is how we got Tidus from Shuyin, I think, idk I really don't care for 10-2's plot). The fayth were trying to imagine what would happen if Zanarkand was never destroyed, but I think they simply would have started running out of ideas for new people who lived there, so it did end up looping old characters into slightly newer forms. Like fanfiction characters, honestly.

But it's so great to see Tidus's journey. He starts the game a confused outsider just trying to survive, someone who doesn't mind speaking up about how he feels and what he believes. His outsider perspective provides a means for the audience to be introduced to Spira's world building as well, and we also get to see an unbiased point of view to Yevon's religion - and not necessarily a disrespectful one. Tidus, though he doesn't preach Yevon as a devout follower for his entire life, still tries to make an effort to be respectful of the good parts. When Shelinda corrects him, "That's MAESTER Seymour, or LORD Seymour", he says "Sorry, I'll be careful."

He dashes into the Cloister of Trials to save the summoner who might be in danger, regardless of the rules or presincts, because he's got a childish outlook life and a good heart despite his many inital arrogant qualities. He wants the best outcome, he's willing to believe in doing the right thing even when it's hard, and yeah it's unrealistic at times, but it's a breath of fresh air for the people of Spira who live rather docile lives always in fear of Sin and dedicating themselves to the kindness of Yevon's teachings. He admits "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea" after he breaks the rules for the first time, and watching Yuna on her pilgrimage and how she interacts with the people who admire her for her father and her own summoner status allows Tidus to humble himself while still remaining fundamentally defiant to anything he doesn't agree is right - aka Yuna sacrificing herself.

Religion isn't always a bad thing, and FFX makes a point to emphasize this. The people of Spira are kind and respectful, banding together in the hard times and unting together to have hope. Yuna is initially a beacon of hope - all summoners are - making people smile and flock to her wherever she goes, and she gives people respect and encourages them to have faith not only in her, but in themselves as well. Even when she's branded a traitor, a significant number of people recognize Yuna's dedication to the people and immediately believe the next tale about it all being an evil Al-Bhed rumor.

Yevon's corruption is just a few people abusing their power, twisting a good message into a cult-like dedication. Wakka is the most notable case, but technically all of the characters go through a period of blindly believing in the teachings and Yevon and eventually finding their own path. Even Tidus, who didn't grow up believing in Yevon or knowing its teachings, finds that the people's way of life living in rightful fear of Sin has them NEEDING Yevon and the messages of kindness and compassion it preaches. Maybe they shouldn't believe in everything the Maesters say Yevon is, but he can understand the intentions behind it and how the regular, uncorrupt people just live their lives trying to be good.

Now that I think about it, the parallels between Yevon and Blitzball actually make a lot of sense - Blitzball is the entertainment people go to in order to forget about the fears of Sin, and Yevon is the religion people worship in an effort to band together and have hope against Sin. Huh. No wonder a Blitzball sign for victory became a religious thing.

Anyway, Wakka eventually apologizes! He recognizes that the Al-Bhed are just people. They don't believe in Yevon's ways BECAUSE they care, just from a different perspective. Just because they don't believe in Yevon doesn't mean they're savages, and when their Home is destroyed by merciless Guado, he hears them singing the Hymn of the Fayth to respect their fallen as well. Wakka admits he didn't want to hear anything he didn't agree with, that he was a jerk, and Cid agrees that he's hated Yevonites just for being Yevonites too.

Here's a Wakka glare just for our collective amusement.

Who were we talking about? Ah, Tidus.

Tidus is indeed a whiny character, childish, toeing the line between humor and annoyance. But he matures throughout the course of his journey, caring for the entire crew but Yuna especially. When they reach Zanarkand and learn the truth about the Final Summoning, Lulu tells him, "If you want everything, you'll end up with nothing," and he replies, "But I want everything!" His unwavering hope and optimism even when everyone is telling him it's impossible is necessary for the story, to tell the characters that yes, your sacrifices will be pretty and give temporary relief, and you'll be dead and martyred and remembered - but how can it be right? It's not.

From his basic, outsider, new perspective on this world he only just joined, it's not right. He didn't grow up with this being normal, so even in comparison to the Al-Bhed, he knows that it's not.

There's a saying somewhere that I forget the source, but basically it goes like "Children are raised to believe the world is good and fair but are outraged when they grow to learn it is not." Tidus asks what an ADULT would do, sacrificing a summoner and just moving on with their lives like it was fine to give one life for many, just happy it wasn't them. Adults are indoctrinated into a way of life and a way of thinking, and it's extremely hard to get people to change their minds - but not, as FFX proves, impossible. Both he and Yuna are still kids, kids who are still able to grow up to see the world for what it truly is.

Yuna was betrayed by Yevon, all her beliefs torn down and the hope she had placed on the system shattered. But she continued her pilgrimage. She dreamt of all the fun things she could do if she quit, knew that all of her friends and Guardians would accept her choice, but she knew she could never let it go. She stood up to the Ronso saying that she was fighting for the people, not the temples or Yevon - impressing Kelk Ronso who says she has an iron will that towers over Gagazette's peaks.

She has given her everything to this trip, but it's not fair. Just because it's the right thing to do doesn't mean it's right - and you need a character like Tidus to put his foot down and say no. Everyone is willing to sacrifice themselves, everyone is willing to be the one to die so that others can be happy. But it's not fair. It's not right to let anyone die, even if they're willing, even if it's one for many. It's a temporary fix, it's feeding an endless cycle of lies and false hope. It's not real.

But it is YUNA who ultimately makes the choice to say no. All this time, she's been insisting she keeps going despite both Rikku and Tidus's protests and desperate attempts to get her to change her mind. She's been the most resolute out of all of them to go through with this, but in the end, it's not Tidus or Rikku who kill Yunalesca before she can get the chance or present her a stirring enough argument or some alternative. No, it's Yuna who asks directly what the cycle of the Final Summoning and Sin mean, hearing that the hope they offer is false, and when asked who will be her fayth, everyone is silent, waiting for her answer - because it is Yuna'a choice, Yuna's pilgrimage, Yuna's story. And she says, "No one."

She would have gladly died for the people of Spira, but she is done. She isn't going to join into this cycle of death and lies. Her father chose to become a summoner and defeated Sin, but it was because he truly believed that it would make a difference. He died because he had hope, and maybe it was indeed false hope, but somewhere deep down, he really did want to find a way to stop Sin for good. He and Jecht went into that battle hoping that Jecht and Auron would find a way to break the cycle. And let's be honest, they did. Tidus and Yuna were brought up differently, but they end up seeing each other's sides of the story and agreeing on so many things. The people are worth fighting for even when they're being misled.

Yunalesca's argument is that sorrow will always exist, and false hope is all anyone can offer to soften the blow. But Yuna is ready to live with her sorrow and brave whatever comes from it. She will find her own hope, even without knowing there will be another way, and she knows she will conquer it. She proved it long before she reached Zanarkand, after enduring Yevon's betrayal; now her methods have changed, but her end goal is as resolute as it's always been. She's going to defeat Sin, and she's going to give people REAL hope, even when it's hard.

Yuna says no to Yunalesca. She joins in the fight to destroy the Final Summoning forever, and slowly she learns that she can function beyond Yevon's teachings. The team who made 10-2 seemed to think that Yuna needed to toughen up and become some kind of badass (which they failed at portraying, Yuna is an utter wreck in that game and let's not talk about how Rikku devolved), but she was already a freaking strong character! She stood up for herself the entire game as a strong-willed summoner willing to give her life for the cause, but she also stood up for herself by declaring she would LIVE. It's entirely in character for her, even when she's changing her mind and broadening her horizons. Yuna was the character who smiled even knowing she was on a long, slow journey that would end in her death, who was willing to do it if it would make others smile too. That is a strong character right there.

I do agree that she might not know what to do with her life now that she doesn't plan to die, but come on, don't make her into a wanna-be who tries to pretend like she doesn't care only to reveal yup she cares, what a pushover. Her caring nature is what makes her great to watch! Frustrating when she tries to do everything on her own with the Seymour thing, but entirely in character. Empowering when she makes her own choices and decides for herself. I don't know why she does nothing for two whole years during Eternal Calm but okay maybe I can see it. But for her to try doing a 180, respecting no one and no one respecting her even though she DEFEATED SIN was such a mistake. Plus the mini games in 10-2 are utterly atrocious. Anyway, tangent over.

But then the script has flipped at the end of 10. Tidus is the one that realizes Zanarkand is what Sin is protecting, that defeating Sin will make the whole city and everyone made from the dream disappear. He is the one who has to sacrifice himself for Sin to be defeated. Unlike summoners, however, Sin won't come back if he does this. He's grown across the journey just like Jecht did, following a summoner and learning what it means to want to give your life living in hope that it'll save everyone else.

Yuna has to sacrifice the Aeons she's forged her own bond with - which, remember, every summoner makes a unique bond with the aeons. She has to say goodbye to Auron, see Sir Jecht only one more time as he gives his life as an Aeon and uses the last of his power to give his sword for the final battles to fight on (did ya notice that?). Then, in the final tragic scene, Tidus becomes intangible and tries to say a cheerful goodbye, apologizing for not being able to show her Zanarkand like they had pondered when Yuna was dreaming of the things she'd do if she abandoned her pilgrimage and lived. Now, Yuna is the one having to say goodbye to the one sacrificing their life. The soft piano, the wailing of the colorful pyreflies as they disperse with all the dead, it's freaking beautiful man.

Yuna's final line hits hard too, her speech about how everyone has lost homes, dreams, and friends. They can build new homes and new dreams, even if they can't get back lost friends. "The people and the friends that we have lost...or the dreams that have faded...never forget them." Get it? Be...Because Tidus is a dream that faded? Anyway I'll just be crying in the corner over here don't mind me.

In the end, it's sort of understandable why Yuna just sits around in Besaid after the end of 10 during Eternal Calm. Maybe. Not only did she have no plans for her life after Sin was defeated (thinking she would be the one to die), but she lost her entire purpose in life AND she's reeling from the fact that even though she made the choice not to sacrifice herself just for everyone else's false hope, someone still had to give their life - Tidus. Someone still ended up dying for the cause, even after all she went through deciding to live.

The ONLY moments I actually respect Yuna from 10-2 is during the end, when Nooj volunteers a plan to give his life to win the battle (which was already stupid even before Yuna's speech because we're talking about an Unsent, Nooj your plan does nothing to stop someone who's already dead, idiot). Yuna's lines are extremely good and well voice acted too: "'We had no choice.' Always 'We had no choice.' Those are our magic words. We repeat them to ourselves again and again. But you know... The magic never worked! The only thing we're left with is regret. No. I don't want this anymore. I don't want friends to die...or fade away. I don't want battles where we have to lose in order to win."

It also demonstrates better than that stupid minigame how difficult it was for Yuna to have destroyed the aeons she had forged a bond with. What I'm saying is, fuck Beclem and everyone else who dares disrespect Yuna, summoners, and everything they went through. Even though that time and age in Spira might be over, that's NO reason to immediately scoff in the face of everything all those people went through - everything YUNA sacrificed and endured for the sake of these ungrateful whelps.

Both Tidus and Yuna were excellent protagonists of X, despite both of them having a lot of growing to do. In conclusion, let me make use of this fun poll feature if you made it this far down:

[soundwavefucker69]

a lot of y'all want people to flip left in theory, but not in practice, bc you do not want to put in the work to figure out how someone gets to where they're at and how to figure out how to pull someone back from the edge.

listen. i grew up in an evangelical Pentecostal church denomination that is actually registered on the American cult index. the ONLY reason i wasn't homeschooled was bc children were expected to browbeat all those filthy sinning six year olds on the playground. i don't think y'all realize testimonies and recruitment is an actual tactic to make the world big and mean and scary and make you think from a young age that the whole world hates you for your faith. its primary purpose is NOT to get new people in the church. its primary purpose is to keep people in churches for GENERATIONS. better to just have em breed and keep turning out the output than bring in new people, you know?

and it works. it works.

the thing about deprogramming is you don't suddenly wake up one day and be like "actually everything i was ever taught was wrong and bad and i have hurt so many people and need to go perfectly publicly apologize right now and phrase it in the absolute perfect way that is above reproach." like. it is actually a process. you need to wake up one day and go huh. i don't think i agree with this thing the pastor said. and then that thought kinda bubbles around in your brain a bit and grows and crests and then becomes another thought. huh. my pastor says queer people are of the devil, but my friends on tumblr are all really kind to me, and haven't tried to fuck me.

i don't remember my username from back then, but i am not fucking kidding in saying tumblr jumpstarted my deprogramming around 15/16. and it took years. it took actual fucking years. i eventually deleted that old tumblr bc there was so much shit on it i wasn't proud of and moved on and eventually made my way back.

deprogramming is a fucking process. you start by justifying the people that did this to you. then you get angry. you get mad. you realize you were a victim in every sense of the word. then you settle into a comfortable place where you realize you were a victim, and so were they, and that's just how it goes.

the problem with deprogramming is you have to also recognize abusive people can also be fucking victims. and that kind of destabilizes the generally accepted view of victims.

not everyone can actively handle deprogramming someone. it's fucking hard. a lot of the work has to be done by them, and they have to want to do the work. i cannot handle deprogramming someone. i'm too traumatized and i get too upset. it's not one big realization that changes your entire worldview. it's little realizations, over a long course of time. sometimes you slip up and realize years down the line that you're still thinking that way, just dressed up in respectability politics. it's easy to get caught up.

that's the current problem with the current trend of gen z being like the internet police on a scale we have not seen before. bc everyone assumed their parents did the fucking work, but their parents didn't, not really, and now they're fucking insane. everyone went hands off as everything about the internet pointed to a trend of sanitization for corporate interests, and now it's a huge fucking mess where every space on the internet needs to be "child friendly" and all these kids have grown up with that where they were coddled as the internet was made "safe" for them and their parents' sensibilities. like sure, yeah, twitter is fine for a thirteen year old, there's no porn on it. so when they're confronted with actual adult topics, they freak the fuck out. they're so fucking sex repulsed and critical thought is not encouraged at home. safe internet practices are not encouraged. if something that exists on their morally pure internet that isn't supposed to be there, it's a problem.

like i'm not kidding in the aspect we do actually have to deprogram these kids. they're getting worse and worse and inventing new things to not meet their moral purity laws. like height differences are pedophilia coded nowadays. it's fucking bizarre. conflict in a relationship where one person is in the wrong is abusive. they are entirely unprepared for the real world.

but like. it's not happening. the deprogramming is not happening and they're ascribing to new moral panics that just build and build on top of each other. they're radicalizing each other. but like... to deprogram, you do actually have to have compassion. you do have to look and see where things went wrong, where it started, and you do have to be patient. and part of deprogramming means not making an actively hostile space for people to unlearn this shit. bc people on the outside of their echo chambers being hostile is what reinforces the echo chamber. that's just how it fucking works.

i'm not saying you shouldn't go out of your way to reach out to people. no, you don't have to do that. just... if you see someone else doing the work, don't get in their way. i've seen a lot of YouTubers that dedicate themselves to interrupting the alt right pipeline getting fucking slammed for their work and drowning under mass harassment campaigns, and it's not helpful. like, if they're doing something wrong, you can correct them nicely and move on. not lead a mass harassment campaign, bc the people unlearning from their work look at that and go. ha. yeah. no.

anyways. that's it.

[ariainstars]

"The Acolyte" is Cancelled

or

Why the Woke Controversy is Getting Ridiculous

In all honesty, I didn’t go crazy for The Acolyte. I found it rather mediocre. But I had already read and heard so much discussion and criticism about it, both from people who hate it and from the ones who liked it, before and after the second season was cancelled, that I watched it just in order to form my own opinion.

What’s Positive

The Acolyte is a series that doesn’t thrive on fanservice. Finally new characters, new perspective, no reference to characters or events from the classic movies. It’s not a great series, but at least it's something new and fresh.

It’s not a story of Good vs. Bad. Everybody is human and fallible. And people get to step into other people’s shoes instead of simply judging them - Mae putting on Osha’s clothes, Osha putting on Qimir’s helmet etc.

“The Force does not belong to the Jedi.” (Luke Skywalker in The Last Jedi)

Yes, some in the galaxy far, far away call it The Thread. And use it their own way. Both ways might be wrong. That’s what The Acolyte is about: Osha is raised by two very different mentalities and finds both don’t suit her, so she joins Qimir who is also looking to find his own path.

The Controversy

No, the show is not perfect by a long shot, but everything I read and hear about how bad it is, how lesbians and diversity and wokeness are at the root of the problem is stupid.

1. The Acolyte is not about lesbians. The central relationships are a) between two sisters, b) a Jedi and his apprentice (father-daughter relationship) and c) a male and female former Jedi (erotic relationship? maybe? wasn’t made clear enough).

2. No one was gendered by Disney in Star Wars. Characters are heterosexual or you don’t find out if they have a sexuality at all because it doesn’t matter for the story. If Aniseya (the twin’s mother figure) and Mother Koril (the woman who bore them) are a couple, I noticed no love, partnership or erotic spark between them.

3. The two main characters of The Acolyte grow up in an all-female society, but that has nothing to do with the glorification of lesbians or hatred against men. The women distrust the Jedi because they want to take their daughters; they never say or show that they hate men. Also, the Jedi who want to take the girls include two female ones.

4. The Dathomir witches Asajj Ventres belonged to were an all-female, coven, too. Nothing new here. (In Dune we have the Bene Gesserit, also all female). No one called them a bunch of lesbians, to my knowledge.

5. The most impressive fighter and Force user in the entire show is Qimir aka the Stranger. A guy. We even got to see him naked. Yup, definitively a guy. Not a woman or anything in between.

6. I noticed nothing erotic (lesbian or otherwise) in the entire show. The only time we feel a little erotic spark is when Qimir openly flirts with Osha, i.e. a guy with a girl, and that isn’t even requited by her. Amandla Stenberg, the actress who portrays Osha and Mae, came out as non-binary, but that doesn’t mean anything in this connection because the two characters she plays aren’t (or if they are, it’s never said).

What Is Actually Behind It? The Usual Thing...

Jedi Stans

Many die-hard Star Wars fans are upset because the Jedi Knights have always been some sort of infallible superheroes to them. More recent productions show that the Jedi are actually the problem. George Lucas himself had already done that with the prequels; they weren’t as well received, but he was still the creator of the classic films, and at the time there was no social media, so the backlash wasn't as vicious as today.

Sol: “She was just a child.” The Stranger: “You brought her here.”

„The majority of my colleagues can’t imagine a galaxy without the Jedi. And I can understand why. When you’re looking up to heroes, you don’t have to face what’s right in front of you.“

„I think the Jedi are a massive system of unchecked power posing as a religion. A delusional cult that claims to control the uncontrollable. You project an image of goodness and restraint. But it’s only a matter of time before one of you snaps. And when, not if that happens, who will be strong enough to stop him?” (Senator Rayencourt to Master Vernestra)

It’s words like these, and the actions that prove them, that makes die-hard fans get out of their minds with rage. Because it’s the truth, a truth they have spent decades ignoring. Still in the classics, Obi-Wan and Yoda tried to manipulate Luke to push him to commit patricide. Ben Solo is what Luke would have become: a self-loathing patricide burning in an inner hell. And we see over and over how a Jedi is the first to draw a weapon although they are allegedly trained to fight only in defense. The Jedi have made so many mistakes and committed so many sins that I could spend hours writing about nothing else. But woe if you dare to attack the alleged heroes who can make things float and have shiny sabers and a detached, uncaring attitude (or at least, pretend to have it).

If a Star Wars show had Jedi for protagonists and these would be the infallible, all-wise superheroes hardcore fans take them for, these fans wouldn't mind one bit if these Jedi were black, Asian, female, lesbians, non-binary or anything else. They would swallow it all, hook, line and sinker.

Some YouTubers Apparently Don't Have a Life

Now Star Wars is owned by Disney, and the antis see the studios as an enemy they need to fight tooth and nails because apparently, there is no life without a fight. These fans are a much bigger problem than the studios. Thanks to social media, any idiot can easily post their unthinking, hateful opinion online and gain a following of fans who are of the exact same opinion but would never listen to another perspective, or watch the tv show in question in the first place.

This whole discourse just shows what a polarized world we live in. You don’t like something, so you „fight” against the supposed bad guys who are responsible (in this case the Disney studios).

The Acolyte had few viewers because apparently many fans watched and listened to haters online instead of watching the actual show and forming an opinion of their own. Also, it is well known that the author is a lesbian and the protagonist identifies as non-binary, so that’s enough of a reason to reject it.

How progressive. I remember learning how in feudalist Europe the nobility refused to listen to Händel or Rossini because not being of noble birth, they allegedly couldn’t be good composers.

My point is that Star Wars stans should at least give a film or a tv show a chance instead of bowing down to preconceived notions, expectations, entitlement and influencers who they probably don’t even know personally.

After The Last Jedi, there was bullying and even death threats en masse; it already started with the prequels, Ahmed Best became depressed and Jake Lloyd schizophrenic. Kelly Marie Tran and Daisy Ridley had to cancel all of their online accounts. And these are just a few examples. I wouldn’t want to produce or work on Star Wars. There is no reason to be so aggressive over a piece of media.

I don’t like the „woke” agenda either, the victimization of minorities is ridiculous and counterproductive.

But please, who hates The Acolyte should at least a) watch the series and stick to the facts and b) look at themselves first. Female heroes, black / Asian actors, queer characters are not the problem here. It’s their hero worship of the Jedi and their misguided idea of what a „true hero“ ought to be like that’s at the bottom of all of their hatred. Die-hard fans still feel personally offended because Luke Skywalker had actually taken responsibility for his faults and drank green milk; they can record hours of YT videos where they keep ranting about every single shot of The Last Jedi, never admitting that they hate it because they feel like their personal pride got a blow on purpose. They would never listen to fans who actually liked that film, and why.

Some problems, really. These alleged fans ought to get a life instead of spending years and years hating on Disney, Kathleen Kennedy etc. because Their Heroes were (shocking) taken off their pedestal and humanized.

What also gets me is how utterly entitled and ungrateful these fans are. Ever since 2015 Disney has produced plenty of good Star Wars content until now: Rogue One, Andor, The Mandalorian, The Bad Batch, the 7th season of The Clone Wars, Ahsoka, The Force Awakens, just to name a few. Most fans agree that these are good or at least solid work. But as soon as something comes out that they don’t like, they forget all about that and rave that Disney should sell the franchise to more competent authors, or that at least the current board of directors should be fired and replaced.

Really? Listen to Rachel Zegler telling everybody what she thinks of 1937 Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, the film that actually laid the ground for the studio’s success and wealth, and that she’s supposed to be starring in the remake. There’s a person who ought to be sacked right away for her disrespect of the original and overall entitlement.

Star Wars Is Not Owned by the Haters

In the end, a good story is a good story because it’s well told, not because of the ideals it (apparently) wants to convey.

Star Wars, ever from the start, was not about Good vs. Evil but about the power of love. The fact that the Jedi are not the good guys but fallible though well-meaning people is what makes them interesting. It’s not the author’s fault if so many fans believe that a good story must be Good vs. Evil and that there is no alternative to that. Star Wars started out as a fairy tale, it’s not your average action movie franchise.

I would like many of the antis have to do the actual work, i.e. write and produce a Star Wars show or movie, and do better. Most of them wouldn’t get two sentences together because all they know how to do is to hate on people who actually are creative, even if the result of that creativity isn’t perfect.

So, I suggest we, the more moderate fans, take a stand. Why have we allowed the antis to hate on Disney and on Star Wars in general since The Last Jedi came out? Why are our voices not louder? Why do we always hope for something better to happen?

The studios are drowning in hatred, for all the wrong reasons. It’s a pity that the more aggressive and stupid voices are also the loudest.

I would have liked to see a second season of The Acolyte, just to see where the characters would go. So would many other fans.

Let’s speak up. As for me personally, I’m sick of getting invested in stories and then let down.

Have a nice day.

[mcytscienceside]

did tubbo and bbh ever spar together before tubbo became king or where they at odds like in canon?

this is a little specific but on day 2 of purgatory etoiles hung out with blue (tubbo, tina, and bbh specifically i think) bc ggn wasn't online till he was driven away by psychological warfare/ran out of time. in your au does he ever get close of the soulfire kingdom?

also how do the egg and flag events work in your au? or is it different to canon in that way because the characters are no longer in a game?

is the watcher/feds a part of your world?

hows pac doing? does he still have a history with cell in your au?

what does mariana think of bolas's angel? is juana still dead/a code? how would that work with slime?

do charlie and bbh still have whatever the fuck it was they had in canon?

sorry for the many many questions i just really enjoy your writing!

Sorry for the late reply!! I finished up an essay so now I can write about cubitos >:) I'll put this behind a read more only because I know it's gonna get away from me- More purgatory royalty content here we gooo!

Tubbo and Bad had a similar relationship to canon, kinda antagonistic, but slowly growing to care. This whole arc of learning to care and become closer happened far sooner than in canon because the two basically lived together. But I do think on most days they would spar! Tubbo is stubborn, he wants to get stronger, and training with the knight of soulfire is one way to get ever stronger. I think Etoiles is very well liked by both kingdoms, despite the constant war, his laidback attitude endeared him quickly when Aypierre was king and later on to most of soulfire's council. He couldn't just up and visit but diplomatic missions where much easier...of course they never expected for Etoiles to...do what he did in order to escape his duties as king... Different in this as the eggs do exist in this au! I'll try and make a post about how they work here hehe! But basically those events would translate more into traditional battles than anything game-like. I have to work on how all the wins will affect the characters and what that specifically means for the egg game with bolas winning against GGN. WATCHER...IS IN PROGRESS I SWEAR- I think he'd be some kinda driving force of nature more than anything. Some myth on why their land is plagued by storms and toxic gas and other ailments. The feds meanwhile I've been starting to see as the, ironic, newcomers to the island. Sailed here on many boats and attempted to settle down not knowing the three kingdoms. Whether they make their own kingdom or split off to join others is still up in the air hehe. PAC MY BELOVEDDD yes he does indeed have history here with Cell. Pac was almost one of the angels sacrifices despite his generally solid past with Cell. He was part of soulfire, he was no better than the blood he could spill, nothing else mattered to Cell. Pac was resourceful enough to escape but has now become sure that his friend Cell is no longer in that monster of a man. Now pac also has his prosthetic leg which actually has different attachments depending on what territory he's going in! I would have to think on this more anon, very good question, mostly I think that Juana indeed has been lost. With the codes maybe being another 'disaster' that specifically attacks children. Kinda like the birthday curse in made in abyss! Mariana views the angel of death with much more neutrality than most, he's worship, that's all angels can hope for in this plane of existence. Mariana wouldn't mind such a devoted cult either but he's not exactly looking for more trouble by stepping on the toes of the angel of death. and of COURSE slime and bbh are still weird, I love writing insane people, They have such a strong pull to each other in the worst way. Bad loves torment people and in turn slime gets better tactics to combat bad. There is a constant arms race of tactics and weapons and magic in order to one up the other. Bad used to try and kill slime but now he seems to let the guy go...just to do it again and again. You know! for fun!! :D This got long and sorry for any answers that weren't very set in stone yet this is just constantly spinning in my brain VGHGKJLHB.

[wyrdle]

Big Sho Minazuki fan here, I think it's a shame that Ikutsuki wasn't fleshed out any further. Like he's exposed as a bad guy and then immediately just... falls off.

YEAH. it's such a shame, when he's like the perfect foil character to MC lmao. One gains strength from bonds, the other has none/is incapable of it and thus sees no meaning in living. I'd have loved for his social link to be one which stays permanently at 1, regardless of what you do with him, as an illustration of this. And instead of SLs talking at you about things, he becomes your confidant and you reveal more about yourself and your friends lol. Throughout this there's the risk of revealing Pharos sealed within you, thus links to Aigis' shutdown etc, as well as an undercurrent of "This man is not normal" beyond his puns lol. I'd have loved to see the puns taken further as a masking tactic, one that whilst he personally enjoys, is still cover up lol. Maybe nearing November, as his excitement to finally die grows, you learn more about him as a person finally. idk lol I'm doing Atlus' job in making the earlier parts of the game fun and intriguing to carry you through the months.

ANYWAY. his relationship to Sho is so fascinating to me, because it's wild that Sho is even left alive tbh. For a guy who views death as deliverance/freedom from suffering+ his saviour complex with SEES, you'd think he'd pull life support off Sho and recollect the plume of dusk from his dead body. So there's plenty reason to kill Sho if he were just any experiment, and start over, even wipe a potential loose end to his research with Kirijo group. But he doesn't, and even leaves Sho with an inheritance I assume is hefty enough to last him his lifetime. So yeah, I feel like there was some twisted care and affection for Sho as a son, coming from the guy who, if set up properly next to P3 MC, whose nihlism is born from lack of bonds combined with who knows what he went through.

@ponderousorb has likened him to a real life saint called Thérèse of Lisieux, who was chronically ill and eventually developed "chosen one" or other strange beliefs as a coping mechanism whilst living. Basically whatever the pun guy went through in his life twisted him into viewing everything so bleakly and his "selfish" desire to be a Prince a coping mechanism. Dude's depressed and suicidal at his core, and of course combined with being embroiled into a death cult... well. Can't be a good parent lol.

Of course, all of the above is just my input/perspective/spin on his character. The games seem happy to leave him as a madman without elaboration about his brand of nihlism. I think if they did, Sho's story wouldn't have changed, but at the moments where Shadow Shuji popped up, stuff would've been more layered beyond whump for Sho. (Potentially flashbacks of interactions between them that leave Sho so pitifully confused and torn... ooft ouch).

It's a fun time to ponder how Shuji and Sho might've been like, if neither had been part of Kirijo Group. I like thinking Shuji might've at least tried to be there for Sho, if he wasn't off feeling like a miserable waste of space. Still not a good parent and neglectful, but I prefer thinking Shuji didn't find pleasure in causing him pain lol. Maybe it started off as clinical then eventual caring, but unfortunately he's deluded himself so hard he might've even thought he was doing Sho good by making him jacked lol. Whatever momentary guilt that'd surface, would be shrouded by his delusions. Idk, he offered SEES a "place by his side" for judgement day since they played such a large part, I can imagine he wished for Sho to reap the "benefits" too.

TLDR man's fucked in the head truly, but narrative (and most persona fans lol, not their fault tbh) never expands on it to investigate the tragedy of nihlism this way. It's such a big plunder on their end tbh, would've made him more interesting as a an antagonist, and certainly bolstered the game's core themes. Like. Why DOES this guy and old Kirijo group want death so badly lmao. The other guys are dead, Shuji is the only remaining mouthpiece for it... and we get absolutely nothing. If we knew his story, we could piece together the sort of underlying motivations of Kirijo group lol.

But anyway. Yeah. Lots of fun stuff, left unexplored! Apologies for the ramble I'm speed running my thesis on Shuji Ikutsuki 🤣

[agentoffangirling]

so here's the thing, your post didn't describe fiction affecting reality but manipulation from others or even grooming

you should know this: all ships are valid. Your 13 year old self did nothing wrong. Being manipulated / groomed into saying "I was wrong for liking a ship" is extremely worrying. Grooming also doesn't have to be sexual, it is essentially someone with power taking advantage of a vulnerable person (you) by posing themselves as their protector/mentor/whatever

other red flags to look out for are things like being told you "deserved to be mistreated because you gave into sin" and being praised if you "have given up that sin and thus changed for the better" because this is the kind of manipulation tactic you find in religious cults.

Here are some sources on how to spot grooming and the difference between an adult who means well and a predator

https://www.businessinsider.com/guides/health/what-is-grooming

https://safekidsthrive.org/the-report/introduction/other-warning-signs/

https://www.splcenter.org/peril-guide-online-youth-radicalization

and here is a safety PSA to spot grooming in fandom communities

http://web.archive.org/web/20240815114926/https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GTtAK2qWwAApG8c?format=png&name=4096x4096

If you are still friends with these kind of people, I suggest you take a long look at them and ask yourself if your relationship is healthy. Pro-tip: if they still control what you are/aren't allowed to like, if they tell you that you are a bad person because of your past/present fictional interests, then the relationship is unhealthy and these people can and will drop you the moment you don't act in the way they want you to

be safe

I made a quiz about my favorite ships. One of those was that proship. I had a comment one time that was like:

"totally agree with all of these except blank"

"oh why not?"

"well, they're brothers"

"not by blood, but okay"

And my day went on. Another time I went over to a friend's house (who is of the same age as me) to chat with her, and she didn't know anything about this media at all, so it was mostly just me gushing my love about it. She did however, know these two characters were siblings, and brought up concerns that it was weird to ship them. Again, I claimed it wasn't, we went on with our days

I started to realize that I was in the wrong when not only did I think about these two experiences, but I started watching more of the media itself, which clearly put them as brothers. That's not grooming, that's called growing from a kid bc kids often don't know what is right or wrong. They learn from it. It's natural to ship problematic things when you're younger bc you don't know it's problematic, and it's only through interacting with the media and other fans do you start learning. From what I've seen, most pro-shippers are never told no and are given content that reinforces their beliefs. They usually don't interact with the fandom or distance themselves from the piece until later. This makes them think that the ship is perfectly okay. Telling someone no is not grooming

Not all ships are valid if they reinforce toxic behaviors and/or mirror real-life problems. To be told that shipping siblings is bad is not grooming and I am astounded you actually think that. What the actual fuck

[star-drip]

random lore update that makes no sense again and probably overlaps and contradicts everything!! yay!!!

anyway, my favorite thing about the cult in my paracosm is how closely it follows the "boiling frog" metaphor.

(ig i should put a tw for the mention of animal harm, also transphobia/death/harm mentions)

"The boiling frog is an apologue describing a frog being slowly boiled alive. The premise is that if a frog is put suddenly into boiling water, it will jump out, but if the frog is put in tepid water which is then brought to a boil slowly, it will not perceive the danger and will be cooked to death. The story is often used as a metaphor for the inability or unwillingness of people to react to or be aware of sinister threats that arise gradually rather than suddenly."

i've always loved learning about cults and groups of people who share some kind of unique practice/belief. real stories and fictional stories are both equally as interesting imo. my favorites have always been the ones that are morally wrong to us but so normal to the group. i also just like the "evil" ones lmao.

OH MY GOD I WANT TO REWATCH HEREDITARY!!! i feel like it is perfect inspo for how i kind of want to go with my paracosm's cult. (hard movie to watch though. mentally draining asf. the lore is amazing though)

if it wasn't horrendously obvious, the way my paracosm operates changes all the time, but the main theme of manipulation and cold comfort always stays the same. >:)

they worship demons, yes, but they also just believe a bunch of random shit for no real reason. like, how butterflies mean somebody is blessed and how moths can "tell them" to harm/possess/people. they often use this to make excuses to sacrifice people. they also drop their blood on random flowers as a gift to nature. like, okay, you do you. i guess. 🥰

so for some shit i already mentioned a long time ago (i think), emerson was given to her aunt, because she was born after luca. her mom only wanted one kid and not two. emerson is still fully aware of this shit with the cult and branded, but she's still not fully immersed into it like luca is (they are also severely transphobic to him so that's fun!)

fun fact! anyone seen as "possessed/part demon" is seen as "godly" until they step into the real world that has regular beliefs! then it is basically the purest form of evil! fun!

most people in the cult are "cursed" at a young age to be like this. it causes the curse to be branded on their skin. :3

this cult is basically the rival to like anyone's morals ever. you will be seen as the worst person ever by everybody if you are in this cult. everyone who is a part of this has to hide the branding at all times and show no signs of the "demon magic," whatever the hell that is.

BACK TO THE MANIPULATIVE SHIT

basically, they do what any cult does. they find vulnerable people and preach their beliefs to them, telling them how much it changed their lives for the better. they will even tell fake stories. they just want their group to grow more powerful.

what are their main beliefs? these demons are good guys and not horrible pieces of shit like everyone says! they make you soo connected to the spirits (yes there is a spirit world that people can go to. not everyone can access it) and totally not draining you of your soul! you just have the most powerful religion!! it's powers!!

honestly, half of the people that grew up around this stuff just assume it's normal until, one day, they realize it's not?? scary shit. i love that shit. i love the crisis moments.

the people that end up being sacrificed are often the ones that find out how bad it actually is too, and they tried to get help (wonderful. spectacular. nobody saw that coming).

what exactly is bad about it though besides killing people? 😟

(tw again) promotes harm of any kind. self harm, abuse, sacrifice, promoting false hope, feeds on weakness- tells them that this is all for a good cause, it is not. lmao.

i don't have it all figured out. i still don't have any real rules for the magic. it's just kinda there right now. 🥰

OH. do luca and emerson's friends know? NOT YET. (except for aiden because he was low key involved for a minute).

okay bye.

(oh, also, the spirit world rivals with the demonic part all the time. it's almost like kingdoms or parts of land or some shit.) byeee

[took-my-breath-away]

I love your essays! I love that we can pick your brain. As someone that's kinda been living under a rock for the last 5 or so years... why does everyone seem to hate tom cruise?

(Please don't be upset! I'm genuinely asking!)

hey anon!! no worries, i'm glad you asked—i was in the same boat of curiosity and confusion myself for a long time. i used to be pretty ambivalent about tom, especially growing up in the early 2000s when the media and tabloids painted a very specific picture of him. it wasn't until i had some long, eye-opening chats with a friend that i started to reassess my own biases around him. we talked a lot about his involvement with the church of scientology, his personal life, and the ways the media has influenced our perceptions—not just of tom, but of anyone living under that intense spotlight.

this is a hard one to answer, especially publicly, i don't know the guy personally and never will, all i have is what i can tangibly see, read and hear, and i'm still on my own journey to better understand the hate and where it all stems from - as well as determining whether this discomfort i have for liking him as an actor is warranted at all. others in teh community probs do a better job explaining this stuff than me, but i'll give it a go - from someone that's learning to unpack her own biases and read between the lines a little.

a significant part of the backlash towards him seems to stem from his connection with the church of scientology (which most consider a cult as far as a cult is defined). while he is closely associated with the church, it's possible that he was more influenced by the organization than people realize. scientology has a history of using manipulation and control, especially over its most prominent members, and there's a part of the church specifically focused on recruiting celebrities. tom's fame and public image were clearly valuable assets to them, and some of the controversies that became headline news might have been shaped or intensified by that environment.

being in the public eye for decades subjects someone like tom to a lot of scrutiny, and confirmation bias often plays a role in how his actions are perceived. once a particular narrative is established—like his connection to scientology or rumours about his behaviour—people are more likely to interpret everything he does through that lens. this means that any potential misstep or unusual moment can be exaggerated to fit the story people already expect. tabloids and media outlets tend to focus on sensational aspects, particularly his scientology ties, reinforcing the same narrative over time, while more neutral or positive aspects often get overlooked or downplayed. now, this isn't me excusing anything, more ruminating on how we perceive people and events, and what lenses we do this thru.

some of the dislike also seems to be linked to personal moments being blown out of proportion. the 'couch-jumping' incident on oprah is a good example—it’s become iconic in a way that makes it easy to overlook that it was just a moment of enthusiasm. i remember seeing it back then and cringing a bit, but looking back, it wasn’t thaaat bad. cringe, yes. terrible? no. public opinion was influenced by pop culture too, like shows such as south park that mocked him and highlighted his scientology involvement. there are also rumours about his on-set behaviour being unpredictable, though i haven't done much digging into that. it might be worth exploring to get a fuller picture.

people tend to forget that celebrities, no matter how famous, are still individuals dealing with personal pressures and challenges—especially within something as controlling as scientology. i've heard accounts suggesting he tried to leave the church but faced obstacles like blackmail over confidential information shared within the organization. that perspective made me think of him more as someone caught in a difficult situation rather than just a willing participant. though... one has to acknowledge that these things aren't always mutually exclusive. i'm still learning, but this is what i know so far.

ultimately, a lot of the negativity around him seems to come more from the media spectacle than from who he actually is (if we can ever really know who that is). it's a complicated topic, and if you're interested, there are some insightful sources and interviews that explain how the church operates and how they might have influenced members, including tom. diving into those details might help you understand it a bit better. you don't have to love him, damn you don't even have to like him, but as long as you're doing your own opinion-cooking, you're sorted.

in the end, ig it's a personal choice—some people prefer to separate the art from the artist, and that might be the most balanced approach. it's the route i'd usually take, but i'm challenging myself rn by reading into it and trying to make more of an informed opinion on my own. jury is still out for me, but i'm comfortable with what i'm learning so far!

in short; cult associations, media being media, group mentality and confirmation bias. but again, we'll never know the guy and never know for sure what's what!

[dude1818]

The Glass Sentence

Went on vacation last week, which means plenty of time to read on the flight. On the way out, I read The Glass Sentence by S. E. Grove, the first book in The Mapmaker's Trilogy. The Goodreads synopsis recommended it for fans for His Dark Materials, but I would go as far as to call it a clone (although without the fun animals). That's not necessarily a bad thing, although it makes comparison unavoidable

The setting is an alternate history that forked from our own when history itself broke. The Earth exploded and reassembled itself with fragments throughout time: the protagonist is from 19th century Boston, Canada has fallen to the prehistoric Ice Age, the Caribbean is in the Golden Age of Piracy, and Mexico and the western US are an amalgamation of anywhen from 500 to 2500 CE. It's a fascinating premise, and I was hoping for a sci-fi version of HDM

The plot is that Sophia (14) comes from a family of great explorers and cartographers. When her uncle is kidnapped by a cult that wants to reforge the world into their timeline of origin, she and her new friend from the West have to take his special glass map to an old acquaintance in Mexico. Along the way, they join a pirate crew who get them across the Gulf and into the palace at Mexico City, while the cult chases them down. Turns out, the Ice Age to the south is actually from a future snowball Earth, and Sophia has to somehow stop its rapid spread north

Pretty early on, we were introduced to the Macguffins of this world, which are weird maps. Clay, cloth, glass, metal, water maps, only the Avatar can read all five. The gimmick is that they all encode human memories somehow, and reading them makes you "remember" various attributes of the location they describe. It was weird, but I guess we can chalk it up to possible future tech and being the one weird thing

But then halfway through the book we get to Mexico, and it turns out there's a whole caste system about people who have plants growing from their bodies and people who have metal bones. Like what the fuck. HDM pulled off stuff like witches and the underworld by establishing them as being weird and exotic to Lyra, but she knew they existed as part of her world. Here, it felt like a complete genre shift out of nowhere. It wasn't until literally the day after I finished reading the book and was complaining to my dad about that twist that I realized it was supposed to be deep foreshadowing of the sci-fi twist in the 11th hour. I had just thrown up my hands and accepted that the story had magic now, because it hadn't established itself as a book where I'm expected to be able to figure out what the twist is

Other than that it was fine. Obviously it's YA, but it felt more YA than HDM, or at least it clicked with me less. Hard to give it a fair shake while I'm still in the middle of the HDM sequel trilogy. I do want to know more about this world, and while the plot beats are fairly predictable, I'm still going to give the rest of the trilogy a shot

The plant/metal twist I didn't get:

Much later after we learned about the plant and metal caste system in Mexico City, the royal botanist examines some soil samples from a new time period that appeared. Planting a seed in it causes the plant to rapidly grow, and it has metal roots. He tries to use that soil to regrow his own wooden leg, but it grows back as metal instead

Later they're escaping through caverns under the palace, and the botanist drops seeds along the path. They instantly grow into metal-rooted trees. We also know that in the future ice age realm, people had invented artificial soils that allowed them to plant plants through the ice and rock of their world. We were supposed to realize this meant the caverns were from that era (which was later explained as being why they survived when the glaciers reached them)

The big twist is that since this artificial soil lay under the city, people who were born and raised after time broke were exposed to the soil as they grew, which is why they had pieces of plant or metal in their bodies. I have no idea how you were supposed to solve that mystery when there was no indication there was a mystery to solve in the first place!

[sorcerous-caress]

How does Sol get along with their companions/ what do the companions think about them? 👀 If you don’t mind talking about it!

I re-attach wings to angels each time someone asks me about Sol <3 don't worry about the abundance of wingless angels it's unrelated.

This was written assuming Sol is not Tav and is just another companion. Also it's...mostly negtive, Sol isn't easy to get along with, and they don't make it easy for others to like them.

Sol with the companions

Astarion

Act 1: they start indifferent to him. They're not the brightest when it comes to people lying, so his horrible acting and shady backstory flies over their head. During the vampire reveal, they try to pretend that they knew all along. You can pass an insight dice check of 5 to very easily tell they didn't know shit.

The only thing they bond over is being vain. He mentions not seeing his own reflection and they're concerned about how he does his eyebrows then. He fully agrees that it is a struggle and don't get him started on the mess that is styling his own hair.

He'd probably approve of the fact they sacrifice defence and movement for beauty, the whole pain is beauty thing. Honestly both of them are bad influences on each others and just enablers when it comes to bad habits.

I mean he could try to talk them into letting him bite them, if he convinced them that it'd make their skin clearer, it's a 50/50 chance if it'd work or he ends up microwaved.

Act 2: You know how people in cults don't realise they're in one? Sol didn't think their upbringing was that bad or what their family did was that extreme until Astarion started talking about what Cazador did to him and how he loathes him for it, how much he wants revenge. It made Sol think if they too should be seeking revenge, if they too should be loathinh their family. They go from indifferent to curious.

Act 3: they haven't made up their own mind on whether it's a good idea for him to seize the power from Cazador or not. By that point they also need to make a similar choice about their magic, but instead of remaining the way the are like Astarion, they need to pick between losing it all or taking it all. They've grown fond of him by that point as a friend, he points out when someone is clearly lying or manipulating them and they appreciate that. Likewise they are always blunt to him with no ulterior motives.

Shadowheart

Act 1: Sol would be annoyed by the fact she's keeping secrets, and I can see Shadowheart disliking them because of it, and because of their clear appreciation of Lae'zel. Both of them unpolitely avoid each other, a few jabs every now and then, a few trashy comments thrown during party chatter, but nothing major, really. At the end of the day, it's annoyance and not hate.

Act 2: By that point when her and Lae'zel made amends, Sol slowly grows closer to Shadowheart as well. They still do their jabbing and nickpicking each other's flaws but it's more in good humour by now, mean banter is just Sol's way of being playful or showing affectionate and Shadowheart is a champion at it. During her Dame Aylin choice, they say it's best to let Shadowheart decide her own fate and not interfer, both Tav and Shar.

Act 3: When the hard truth downs on them that Shadowheart wasn't keeping secrets but had her memory fully wiped, they find themselves actually feeling guilty for their actions at the start. Guilt is something Sol rarely does ever feel. It's new, raw, and all-consuming, and they can't deal with it. If you have them romanced they'd confide in you with it, maybe you can go tell it to Shadowheart on your own and they'll get annoyed that you did that without their permission, but also thank you for doing it for them.

Gale

Act 1: full on bullying. They absolutely see him as a joke. Especially the Mystra part oh they never shut up about it and how stupid it was of him to try and appease a god back into a relationship, how naive he is for thinking gods ever see mortals as anything more than toys to play with and discard. Digs at him being a wizard, at how he is just borrowing magic while they were born with it, how his view is so narrow-minded. The thing about their "bullying" is that half of the criticism against him is valid and actually make sense, which makes Gale can't stand them because of it, he knows some of their words are right even when the rest is exaggerated bullshit.

Act 2: If you romance him, then Sol tells you to reconsider, that jumping into a relationship with someone who was obsessed with their ex is never a good idea. That Gale isn't who he seems to be, they might be bad at telling lairs apart but there are some things a person can't hide. Then the news from Elminster comes, and they're speechless when Gale actually seems on board to sacrifice his life. To blow himself up for something as stupid as the future of the world or a goddess. They think it's absolutely the dumbest idea he has ever had, and if he thinks their opinion of him was low before, then it just got even lower if he actually goes on with this plan. They tell you that you should never let that happen, they themselves don't know why they feel so strongly about this when they wouldn't have cared if he died in that portal before.

Act 3: they finally know why. They want him to die for himself, not die for someone else, not die for forgiveness. He should get a normal stupid death like all wizards do, he should blow himself up in a silly experiment or something not go on a suicide mission for a goddess who couldn't bother to get off her own ass to see him or a world that doesn't even know his name. They have a serious talk with him if he somehow can siphon their own magic to feed his orb. If you ask if that means they'll lose their magic, then they just stay silent. They aren't surprise when he becomes obsessed with the crown of Karsus. They claim they predicted it happening eventually, be it the crown or another magical artifact. You can pass an insight check to find out they're telling the truth.

Lae'zel

Act 1: probably the only companion they actually liked from the start. There is something about her so familiar. Her sharp mean words feel like home, and her bluntness is a breath of fresh air. They are absolutely vibing with her through the whole journey, keep introducing her to Faerun concepts and human traditions. Make a joke about how they're a descendent of a red dragon, and she's a githyanki, so this must be fate.

Act 2: they didn't think they could respect her even more, and yet when she stood in front of Vlaakith and faced her, her courage almost stunned them. They genuinely admire her, start looking up to her in a way they deem embarrassing to admit, and try to hide it. Start hinting at how they'd love her as a friend.

Act 3: The way she manages her emotions so well and doesn't hide from them but faces them instead is something they thought was impossible to do. How can she do it so easily? Why did no one ever teach them this? How can she accept her new fate just like that when everyone in camp knew how dedicated she was to her cause and peoppe? And how did she manage to find a new cause to fight for do it quickly? Lae'zel to them is the kind of hero you read about in history books. She is the closest thing they'll ever have to a role model. What started as an easy friendship because Sol felt at home around "rude" people quickly became Sol's first ever actual genuine friendship. In a way...maybe it was Lae'zel's too.

At the end of the game, they're very against the idea of Lae'zel turning into a mindflayer if it's brought up. If you're playing Lae'zel origin, then they'd offer themselves instead, something they'd never do for the others or Tav. For their only and first ever friend, they're willing to give up their life.

Wyll

Act 1: is a bit suspicious at the fact he is too charming and nice, at least Astarion has his very clear personality flaws which made his lie fly over their head. But with Wyll he feels too true to be good and they tell him that which he brushes off with a laugh. Then the whole Mizora fiasco is discovered and they're like "Ha, I knew it!"

Act 2: they thought he'd be delighted to her about his father being imprisoned, it means the power will rightfully be his now, right? So why is he putting so much effort into searching for a parent who abandoned him, why does he forgive his father and still care? They don't understand Wyll.

Despite the three of them being humans, Wyll and Gale are the two companions Sol would never understand no matter how much they try. If anything Sol felt left out, as if none of them could relate to one another's struggles. Being human clearly was never enough to build a bond between them.

Act 3: They see the reunion between Wyll and his father and bitterness fills their mouth, realising their own family wouldn't have gone through the same effort. Jealousy, envy at Wyll having something they desperately wanted. Sol is clearly more powerful than him wasn't it for his pact with a devil so why should they feel inferior to him? They shouldn't...but he has so many friends, so many fans and he seems...content, happy.

How dare he be happy when he is this weak, how dare he forgive his father for casting him out, how dare he learn from his past mistakes and aim to better himself rather into crumble into self loathing for being a fraud. Wyll is everything Sol wasn't and couldn't be. Weak and happy.

Karlach

Act 1: she doesn't seem surprised by their attitude but she never banters back with them, they're aren't sure what to make of it. Her skin is thicker than they expected, probably because nothing Sol could ever say or do hasn't been said and done by the devils in hell in a way that's ten times as hurtful. Karlach went through a lot and Sol is barely a scratch on her surface. But what really takes them back is the fact she is still kind to them? It fully weirds them out how nice she is to them, how one time she asked if their draconic lineage gave them enough fire resistance to hug her. Sol didn't know what to say, they just shook their head. If anything they too can't remember the last time they were hugged, the last time someone even touched them in a non threatening way.

Act 2: when her engine gets fixed, Sol curiously asked her if hugging was as much of a disappointment as they knew it would be for her. Instead she hugged them and they remained speechless for the rest of the day. Couldn't even pretend it didn't effect them, hugs are actually nice, they found out.

Act 3: she calls them her friend and Sol wonders how the fuck did they get to that point? Even their morality is as grey as their a rainstorm but Karlach somehow looked past that, past their insults, past their fits of jealousy and past their unstable emotions and saw a person. Sol never considered her a friend so why did she? It can't be that easy to make a friend, yes they can't be the one in the wrong no. Karlach is definitely the one in the wrong here, she should raise her standards for friends and not just throw the word around, she might give someone the wrong idea.

She's dying, they watch her struggling against the flames of her heart and they wonder if this is the same fate awaiting them. If this is why their training was so brutal, why their family was so stern, why their life was so ruthless. Just so they can live? So they remain alive and not succumb to a death like Karlach's.

So why did she seem happy. Why did world life seem so much more colorful than Sol's. Why did she go out with a smile as they remained alive but miserable. For once Sol wonders maybe if the dragon heart inside their chest didn't belong to them, wonders if their own heart was too stolen from them before birth. They feel like they failed her as a friend, like they never appreciated her enough. That by the time they were ready to call her a friend, she was already gone. Left back to the hells or left the world of the living.

-

By the act 3, like the other companions they soften up and start considering friendship. Start paying them actual compliment and stand by them

Tell me if you want me to do Halsin and Minthara too because this was really fun <3 thanks so much for letting me gush about my unlovable little fireball.

[teecupangel]

Have you seen much of Stargate SG-1? Cause Desmond needs an actual good dad other than his ancestors and I think Jack would be a good one for both of them. Especially if it wasn't too long after his son's death.

Maybe a way this would happen would be that Minerva feels bad about either him dying or just being 1 upped by Juno and gets SGC's attention somehow to avoid the flare another way

Stargate SG-1 is one of my most favorite scifi series (and I have a soft spot for the original Stargate movie)!

Okay, so for this one, we need to setup the timeline first.

As far as we know, the Stargate movie is still the canon prequel of Stargate SG-1 (even though a running gag is Kurt!Jack only has one ‘l’ and might have been a different dude) which means that Jack lost his son and became part of the ‘first’ Stargate project around 1996.

At that point, Desmond would be 8 years old.

So, for this to work, we’ll tweak the AC timeline a bit and we’ll use Minerva to set it up. Minerva realized in 2012 that Desmond, as he is right now, would not let the world burn so she uses what time she has left to change the calculations. For this one, let’s assume all Isus is either a Goa'uld or Tok’ra but the distinction between the two started after the Solar Flare on Earth when many of them left Earth to escape the Solar Flare. This is also how humans started to be ‘dispersed’ in many corners of the galaxy.

With that brief explanation out of the way, Juno’s imprisonment would actually be her actual parasitical body being confined in the Grand Temple, connected to the POE network (and the Grey) and reviving her means Juno using Desmond as her host.

Back to Minerva’s plan, she realized that for Desmond to fully understand why it’s better for him if he let the world burn, he must understand the true threat of her species so she pushed forward a new calculation where an 8 year old Desmond sneaked out of the Farm by hitching a ride with one of the Assassins on his way for a ‘milk run’.

He just meant to look around for a bit then sneak back into the pickup but he got distracted by all the strange things he had never before seen. He bumps into Jack who had just returned from the Stargate mission and is trying to take a break and Jack notices the many bruises such a small boy has.

At this point, Desmond knows that he can’t say anything about the Assassins and Templars but he’d already started to think that it’s all bullshit. Still, he keeps his mouth shut because he’s scared that his dad would punish him.

That only raises more alarm for Jack and it doesn’t help that Desmond is around Charlie’s age. So he takes the kid to the police station because that’s the right thing to do (in his eyes) but he keeps checking up on him, even after Desmond gets placed into child services’ custody.

By that point, the Assassins know Desmond is missing and they find him but their ‘rescue attempt’ is thwarted because Jack was there for the first time. This would be the part where Jack and Desmond had started to form some kind of bond and Desmond has slipped quite a bit that Jack believes he’s from a secretive cult that might be training child soldiers for nefarious reasons (also, being called an Assassin Brotherhood? Always suspicious).

At the end, Jack adopts Desmond because of their bond and Desmond starts living with him. Because the Assassins haven’t given up on Desmond though, this meant Jack needed to keep a close eye on him. That’s when Stargate Command gave him an offer he couldn’t exactly refuse. In exchange of him leading the flagship team, Desmond could stay in the most secure military base in America while Jack is offworld.

Unorganized Notes:

So, in this scenario, Desmond would grow up more like Wes from Star Trek (but not as annoying).

Desmond would also grow up having Carter and Daniel as his aunt/uncle and the research team would be more or less his teachers (although it's more of a self study thing). He’d have an interest in anything he doesn’t know because of how the Farm lacked such diversity of information.

He would also serve as some kind of son surrogate for Teal'c who teaches him their way and fighting style. Desmond enjoys it because Teal'c is a kinder teacher than William Miles.

His favorite time will always be fishing with his dad though.

Let’s be honest, Jack got swindled considering how many times Stargate Command got attacked/infiltrated/had a bad day but, at that point, Jack trusts Hammond to protect his son when he’s not there. Also, the Assassins can’t get to Stargate Command which is a plus.

To be fair, the Brotherhood stopped around 2000 because that’s when Cross killed the mentor so the Great Purge was in full swing (at the same time, Stargate Command is busy with the whole ‘Russians have their own Stargate’ thing).

The Isu DNA is more or less related to the Ancient DNA in some form or another. Desmond also has an easy time understanding off-world tech (of Goa'uld origin or inspired by Goa'uld tech) but everyone just assumes it’s because he likes to listen to Carter and Daniel.

Would Desmond still get kidnapped by Abstergo at this one? Probably, considering, 2012 is around the time of SGU which meant Jack is out of the Stargate Command (sorta? Kinda?) and Desmond would be old enough that Jack would let him take his own path. Maybe he’s in the military, maybe he’s part of Stargate Command. Either way, Abstergo would have a harder but not impossible time to take him.

You know what would be funny? If Minerva’s end game had always been for Desmond to be offworld by the time the Solar Flare hits Earth. I mean, it’s highly possible that Stargate Command would find out about the Solar Flare earlier (especially if maybe a friendly like the Asgard told them about it) but a sad ending would be that Minerva’s end game was for Desmond to never learn about the Grand Temple. Maybe even make sure he can’t get back to Earth in time by ensuring the calculations would push him to be part of the Icarus Project and becomes one of the highest-ranking officer stranded in Destiny (also, since he has Ancient DNA, this means SGU’s people would have an easier time in Destiny… sorta)

[forjustice]

N knows he should do his best to respect others' boundaries and maintain his own, but because of how his autism and the way he was raised combine with his personal flaws, he can sometimes be really not great at doing either of those things.

[Abuse mentions under the cut]

Growing up, boundaries were always enforced with screaming or hitting on the part of Ghetsis, or passive aggressive insults on the part of the Sages. He's still figuring out what a healthy, normal assertion of boundaries looks like, and if not for Anthea and Concordia, he wouldn't have left Plasma with any image of what that looks like at all. So unless he pushes someone to absolutely snap at him while telling him to stop talking/doing something he can't recognize when someone's demeanor might indicate they're getting uncomfortable. And unless someone is obviously very, very upset with him, he might think that his transgression wasn't all that bad or he might not even realize he's broken boundaries at all. You could tell him to stop more than once and unless the last time he does it it you fucking shriek at him or say rude things to him he probably won't even realize he's broken your boundaries multiple times. He'll think it's okay to keep going--and if you ignore him after that, he won't have a single clue what he did wrong.

He is also particularly bad at listening when he's told to stop talking about something he's really passionate about--like politics, a fandom that the other person might not be in, or Pokémon. The worst part is when people tell him they're being overwhelmed by his infodumping and would like a chance to speak, because he often interprets that not as "I would like to have multiple conversations across a span of time equivalent to the time you have infodumped in which I can talk about my interests" (which is what the person actually means) and more as "okay so after you talk about one thing I can go back to infodumping." Sometimes if it's a serious topic, he'll even keep going when he self-righteously thinks someone needs to listen.

As for his own boundaries, he barely has a concept of maintaining them. (It took me as a traumatized autistic person a while to figure this one out too, and I'm still figuring it out to this day.) Like my own abuser, Ghetsis allowed him very little privacy even after he turned 18, which has really messed with the way he guards his own even now. He is prone to oversharing and trauma dumping, which ties in with not respecting others' boundaries, but it's also bad for him too because it means that he often puts sensitive information about himself in the hands of people who don't deserve it. In the past, when people would ask him SUPER invasive questions like "What percent Native are you?", he would answer. One time some rando on the Internet accused him of faking his mental illnesses and he literally DMed them his medical records. (You can thank Ghetsis stripping away his right to medical privacy within the Plasma cult for that one.) There have also been multiple people who, upon meeting them, he told them graphic stories about Ghetsis' abuse; many of these people were either incredibly unnerved by it or later used it to hurt him. Thanks to his mom he knows not to do things like giving his blood quantum or his medical records to random strangers. But he's still working on becoming more discreet and internalizing the idea that he doesn't owe ANY of his personal or family background to anyone, and sometimes, he can't help but tell people.

[kooki914]

Could you make a video about ralsei and his fuck up idea of friendship and social interaction

Sadly, I can't make a video as the topic is relatively specific and i prefer broader, more involved theories and the like for videos, but I CAN discuss the topic on this post!

Ralsei as a character is rooted the idea of loneliness, he's a prince with no subjects, a kid with no friends, a prophesied hero with no-one to save, until Susie and Kris show up. I don't doubt for a second that he idolised Susie and Kris before he even met them, their mere silhouettes in the prophecy was probably enough to fill him with hope and longing, and entirely devoted himself to befriending them when they DO eventually show up, by any means necessary. It's probably why he was so unforgiving of Susie at first, she was mean and not at all how he'd imagined her to be, not to mention she wasn't taking the quest he's been looking forward to his whole life seriously at all. He wanted her to be better but by HIS standards, and his standards for making friends is "do everything they say and always be nice".

That specific idea of servitude as a means of making friends is probably rooted in the (what I believe to be a) myth that darkners need to serve lightners in order to be happy (I call it a myth because for some reason the game seems to be leaning into this as a true fact despite it's actively cult-y vibe in chapter 1). He sees no other way for him to feel fulfilled in his life than if he did everything and anything the lightners could want from him, and that's toxic as is, but it seems to be getting out of hand as he preaches that sort of mentality even to Lancer, and when fighting Queen. He marvels at Susie's integrity because he had no idea that someone can be loud, brash and mean, but still be a good person, and moreover a better friend, but I think he's still a long way from being able to see himself as worthwhile even when not servile.

He wonders what being Ralsei-like is, almost in contrast to Susie being Susie-like unapologetically, as he keeps making this distance between him and the lightners. He's the darkner, he's there to serve them, he's there to be fluffy and nice and approachable, as long as he holds on to that hard cut difference between lightners and darkners, he's never really gonna be able to flourish into the person he really could be at his best. This also leads into how he doesn't really care much for the darkners around him, which I find fascinating.

If you pay attention to his dialogue, Ralsei is actually sassy, and at times dismissive bordering on mean. If you skip talking to Lancer the first time he's an intractable part of the map, Lancer will stop you and ask if you want to talk to him, and RALSEI will answer on Kris' behalf, saying "um, no." Lancer is the bad guy, yeah, but he's also a kid, and you'd expect Prince "I'm the nice one" Ralsei to actually be kind to him because of that, but no. He seems inconvenienced, honestly. He grows to care for Lancer eventually, just as Kris and Susie do too, but he doesn't feel that way about other darkners. He has no issue with beating people up if that's what Kris commands, he doesn't bat an eye at what happened with Spamton, he hardly even notices anything is wrong during the Snowgrave route while Susie is blatantly aware shit is going down.

Dissecting all of this, and taking into account that Ralsei is less an empathetic person and more a typical "nice" person, I think Ralsei genuinely has it in him to be much meaner than we usually see him. His idea that he can only properly be friends with the lightners of the prophecy, and that in order to be a Good Darkner he has to be servile and nice, is holding him back more than he's aware. The core idea surrounding Ralsei now, I think, is the idea of having a persona you use to come off as someone you're not without even being aware of it, and his friendships all reflect that. His one-sided pining for Kris where he struggles to put himself on their level, his aggressive hesitance to get to know Susie slowly evolving into fascinated adoration of her integrity, and his straight up unwillingness to get to know anyone BUT those two, are all a reflection of him fully trying to live out the prophecy title of "prince from the dark", and nothing else.

If you would indulge me for a moment, I think Noelle would honestly be a great friend to Ralsei, and teach him a lot about the world. Noelle has a lot of "who I should be" baggage like Ralsei does, but she expresses it in a completely different way. Where Ralsei fully embraces his title and nothing more, Noelle is constantly striving for that great wide somewhere, aware that the expectations placed on her are weighing her down. She's a nerd like he is, but she learns quickly and socially, while Ralsei is slow and always did things on his own. Without even meaning to, Noelle would show Ralsei that it's okay to be "the smart one" and not know everything all the time, that it's normal to get fed up sometimes even when you're "the nice one", and most of all, she'd show him that there's always going to be more to someone than a simple title or objective. She's a lightner, yeah, but she's not part of the prophecy, she's just some random person that got roped into all this, and if Ralsei properly befriended her, he'd see you don't need a prophecy to be someone important and good, and with that, he'd realise HE doesn't need the prophecy to be himself, either. That, and also, Ralsei probably needs to start small and take inspiration from someone a little more tame before be can fully take in Susie and Kris' bad influence lmao