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iztopher · 2 years

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listen. i know this is a cop out. but i genuinely want to know the answer to all of those ask meme questions, so let's just say please answer any of those questions you want to

OMG no if this is a cop out it is an incredibly flattering and sweet one, and i am delighted to do it

...under the cut because this is going to get a little longer because i am in fact doing all of them! (that i haven't already done, anyways)

1. what's the fic youre most proud of?

i keep calling don't you dare go down the best thing i've ever written, and i'm standing by that for the foreseeable future. i put together a lot of stuff i'd been thinking about for years in that fic and i'm really satisfied with how it all came together

2. what's a fic that took you to an emotional/dark/hard place?

this is a really fun question for me because it's kind of embarrassing, because my answer is... i don't have one that i've posted! the fics that take me to a hard place are the ones i have trouble writing the most, so a lot of times they don't get finished. and when they do, i tend to not post them (see question 4).

3. what fic are you emotionally attached to?

nearly all of them! but if i had to pick one, lovely things (but you're the loveliest). it took me a couple years to write, and the last two chapters were written when moonie was visiting me for a week and with a lot of encouragement from her, so i have a lot of good-sad associations with it.

i'm also currently writing a te'ijal character study that is no where near finished yet but has been my quiet close to my heart passion project for a couple years. i'm so scared to work on/finish/share it because i want it to be Perfect and i'm trying to suck it up and do it anyways because the most important thing is that i get it out there!

4. what fic of your own do you read for comfort?

another embarrassing answer which is... none of the ones i've posted publicly, because i have a tiny treasure trove of fic i've written just for this purpose HAHA. they tend to be much rougher around the edges and not up to my standards for characterization (i often joke they're part of "Communication AU", which is an AU where everything is the same but characters who would never openly communicate are willing to do so) because they tend to get into topics that I genuinely do not know how to write when everyone is being cagey/secretive/repressed.

5. what fic of your own won't you read?

the ones i deleted from my computer/external drive </3 but nah otherwise i'll read any of them.

6. what's the hardest part of the writing process for you?

FINISHING THE DAMN THING.

i'm constantly writing like 5-10 fics at a time and flitting between whichever one strikes my fancy the most, which is really fun for the experience of writing and really hard for actually... getting any of them ready to share...

not to mention endings are hard. my little mermaid au outline is currently on the third or fourth version of its ending.

7. how does receiving or not receiving feedback/support impact you?

i cut my teeth on the aveyond fandom, so i tend to go into a fic expecting 2-4 people i know personally to read it and not much anyone else. receiving feedback/support makes me happy & receiving any response beyond what i expect makes me ECSTATIC, but i tend to fair pretty well with not getting it, either.

9. what's your writing process like?

get idea! immediately write as much of the idea as i have, in rough chronological order, but skipping over any sections i don't have in mind yet. then I fill in the rest of it with an outline... unless i don't. (sometimes, if i don't have specific ideas for a fic beyond the initial concept, i kinda just trail off and then pick it back up and keep making stuff up.) since i write mostly oneshots, if i don't have to skip anything in this stage (and i actually made it through to the end), my rough draft is finished at this point! i often still outline for oneshots, though, if i do get stuck/skip sections.

so if i haven't finished my rough draft, then i slowly chip away at that outline every time i pick the fic up again. or just keep going from where i left off in the trailing method lol. i edit a lot as i write at this point in the process, which i'm trying really hard to curb, because i think it's one of the things that makes it hard for me to finish.

once i have the rough draft done, i edit it through a few times. for each edit i make a new copy of the document and just make the changes in there. i tend to tackle each draft fixing a different aspect - one will be cleaning up any plot/logic errors, one will be tightening up characterization and dialogue, etc. when I write te'ijalahad, I tend to have a draft specifically for adjusting nicknames/name usage because otherwise I'll default to "wife" and "husband" for everything and half the fun of these two is the variety.

then, when I'm like, okay, this is pretty good, I give it one more read through where I look at everything all together and edit it. if I'm feeling pretty confident or trying to keep the fic a relative secret, I do this stage alone; if not, this is the point where I enlist a friend to beta for me!

also the one unhinged process of this is every time i get stuck / pick the fic up for the first time in a long while / get to the final read through i write it directly in AO3. I have been told this is chaotic and dangerous

10. how has writing positively impacted your mental health or overall mood?

writing is one of my relatively many creative hobbies & like any of them it makes me really happy to do! i love the feeling when the pieces all click together. it's just fun! writing is also special and particularly satisfying because sometimes when i'm doing game dev or drawing or whatever and i can't figure it out i get pissed off lol but i never get like... upset when i can't figure out a writing thing. i just let it simmer and come back to it.

i'm also trying to work on writing more vent/heavy/comforting stuff as a way of handling my emotions instead of getting stuck in them & spiraling but i'm kind of bad at reminding myself to do that

11. Has a fic you’ve written ever caused issues/controversy?

no and for that i say thank god (although sometimes i get worried about that. i don't think i need to be though)

12. What’s your perfect environment to create/write?

my own desk <3 i love when it's dark outside or raining but i'm not picky haha

13. Do you take pride in your writing, or does it embarrass you? Why?

hell YEAH i take pride in it. that doesn't mean it doesn't embarrass me sometimes, though i'm honestly just proud of myself for finishing a project, so looking back at a fic that i got through enough to post always makes me feel really good. also, i (usually) write characters the exact way i headcanon them, so i'm always like wow... i'm so proud of this characterization... like wow i wonder why it's almost like i wrote it exactly to my tastes. also sometimes the way i use language makes me feel like "oh yeah i did good".

14. Do you compare yourself to other writers? In a positive or negative way?

not really! when i read by other writers i try to take note of aspects of what i like about it and if any of that is my present in my writing/i could make it be present, but other than that i try to mostly take a "wow! two cakes!" approach even when my own writing is concerned.

15. How do you think your writing has improved over time?

relatively recent past: i have a tendency to overexplain myself, and i think my improvement is clearest when i've stopped doing that and have trusted my words to speak for themselves more. or: i feel like i've gotten more direct in what i'm trying to get at?

longer: what i just said on a larger, way more visible scale, and also i feel like i've done a good job at figuring out what i actually want to write and sticking to that. i've gotten more confident and firm in my characterization, stopped trying to write romance because i thought that was the best way to write characters interacting, let myself stop trying to write non-aveyond fic when for me fic writing is for fun and that's what's most fun for me, etc. also i feel like i've gotten more comfortable with using language in a less than 100% literal way.

16. Do you re-read old fics? Is there a time in your writing you won’t go back to?

i would theoretically read any of my old fics that i haven't outright deleted from existence, but i tend not to read anything i wrote before college. i gotta dig out the external drives for those and it's very rare that feels... worth it...

everything on my ao3 I reread fairly often though dghksdl at the end of the day i am a huge part of my intended audience and it only makes sense i read the fics i wrote partly for myself!

17. What’s the best engagement/interaction/feedback you’ve received from someone who’s read your work?

oh man I cannot pick because I'm genuinely so grateful for everyone who reads my stuff and gives engagement <3 my favorite type of engagement is anything where someone says a favorite part, though, whether that's as general as a scene or as specific as a line of dialogue/writing (also shoutout to xzoni who has written multiple play-by-play comments on my fics)

...actually the best engagement i've ever gotten is that on don't you dare go down, literally like 10 different people responded to it by pointing out one or both of two specific lines and being like "this part was so good/my fave!" the like, unanimous agreement that some of that writing was really good? was such a good feeling and is probably part of why that's the fic i'm proudest of.

18. Do you only write when you’re inspired, or do you try and sit down at specific times and write no matter what?

(grimacing) inspired ... i'm trying to work on that. i've found that when i try to write every day, i do, but my other hobbies fall by the wayside, so i'm trying to make sure i write/draw/game dev at least one day a week and then fill in the rest of the week with whatever i'm inspired to do. good compromise.

20. What’s the greatest gift you’ve gotten from your writing?

oh man not gonna lie this is a little metaphorical for me. on a very literal level, a lot of my fics are essentially gifts for myself - i wanted them to exist & knew i was the only person i could be Certain would make them. and that's really nice! to have content to go back to and appreciate.

and on a broader meaning level, i feel like it's given me a sort of confidence that feels really nice, and has let me engage with some really cool people over the common interest of writing, even across fandoms or original content. it feels really cool to talk to people (such as yourself) about Writing TM and be like, wow, I have this thing in common with really cool people whose work i admire!

...not to say this is a little metaphorical for me and then Keep Talking but actually one more thing on this answer is that i remember being like, 9 years old and reading aveyond fic by these authors in their 20s, who i thought had such detailed and thoughtful characterization, and being like, man! i hope i'm like that when i grow up! ...and now I literally am? I'm 23 years old and writing about those exact same characters and I'm proud of that writing & satisfied in my characterization and headcanons, and honestly i feel like one of the greatest gifts writing has given me is the gift of an incredibly achievable goal that i still had to spend 10+ years getting to and feel really proud of myself for doing so.

#dear mel #this got SO LONG. thank you SO SO MUCH for it #it was a lot of fun to write up and answer!!!!#i love you too <333

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chilschuck · 4 months

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Hii!!! I just discovered your blog and i have to say, dude i loooooove the way you write about Chilchuck!!! Absolutely lovely!

If your requests are open, id really like to know your thoughts on Chil intereacting/dating with a reader who's also a hafling? Maybe they're also the shortest of haflings even tho they are an adult? (T^T projecting hard coz I'm 21 and havent grown since 6th grade, literally 4'10 lmfao)

Feel free to ignore if you dont feel comfortable with this ask! Again, love all your works 😭💕

`✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ WAAAAAH ANON THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! (;;;w;;;) i was so happy to write this because my insert is also a half-foot, so this was fun to do!!! i made this super fluffy so i hope you enjoy it!! <333

— CHILCHUCK: x half-foot reader hcs.

꒰ warnings: ꒱ none, sfw + gn!reader! suuuuper fluffy!!

꒰ wc: ꒱ 562

✦ hope this is okay anon!!! this was so fun and now i’m in such a fluffy mood. (;;;w;;;) just wanna pull him close and give him so much love, waaaaah.

✦ Chilchuck would definitely use the height difference he has to his advantage. When you’ve been dating for a while, I like to think he’d pull you to his chest and rest his head on your shoulder, enjoying the proximity. Maybe he even rests his chin on top of your head when he’s feeling affectionate.

✦ Cuddling with this man as another half-foot is so nice. He’s going to be the big spoon most nights to feel protective, and in doing so he’s wrapping you up in that warm body of his. If you feel like spoiling him, snuggle your head into his chest as he holds you, wrapping your arms around him. He’d probably melt into the blankets.

✦ We know Chilchuck isn’t very affectionate in front of others, but I like to imagine him still pulling you close behind closed doors and burying his head into your neck after a long day. Maybe he comes home and wordlessly kisses your forehead, pulling you into him and sighing. (He’ll probably not talk about anything that happened at work, but at least he shows you he’s there!)

✦ As you’re another half-foot, dancing with him is a must! Especially after he’s had a few drinks in his system. We know from that one piece of official art that he can, in fact, dance a bit, so I can see him pulling you in as well. Any time you two can, dance with him and enjoy how big his smile is when you grab his hand that’s held out to you.

✦ I saw other people headcanon this, but imagine wearing his clothes and having them be a little baggy on you. You enjoy it a bit too much, going through his laundry and finding something of his to wear. Chilchuck will get a little red in the face at the sight of you in his shirts, but he’ll wave it off and mumble how nice you look.

✦ Leaning up to kiss his cheek and pulling him by his belt towards you will definitely get him a little flustered. We know how this man is with affection, but if it’s from you, it gets his heart beating a good bit. Decorate his face in kisses by pulling him down gently by his neckwarmer and watch as he lifts his hands up to shakily hold your waist. Sometimes he even pulls you to his lips to get what he really wants if you keep teasing him like this.

✦ Going back to cuddling, if you decide to share a bedroll with him, he’s the perfect sleeping partner. Seeing as he likes to sleep on his back, you can easily slot up against his side and rest your head against his chest. He’ll wrap an arm around you to subconsciously pull you closer in the middle of the night. (Be prepared to get super warm and toasty while sleeping now!)

✦ Chilchuck thinks your height difference is cute, but he’ll never admit it out loud. You can use it to your advantage too by walking past him and kissing his shoulder. Maybe even wrapping your arms around his waist and kissing the back of his neck. Chil will jump a bit at first, but lean into your touch, especially if you nuzzle into his shoulders. After all, you’re definitely a soft spot for him.