#I LOVE WHEN THEY BRING MY WIFE BACK FOR COMIC COVERS!!!!!!!

[secondary-colorentimy]

Helloo!! I just wanted to say I absolutely adore your work, I've been lurking on your account for a little while now and finally decided to send a little message, lol... I really love your drawings, your works seriously never fail to put a smile on my face, and you're such a huge inspo for me!! ^^ I don't really know what else to say, but your Doctor Starline humanoid artwork made me question myself when I realize he's a duck in the canon... ><

HDHWHD TYYYY <3 also im using your ask as an excuse to post these but guys they raised my mans from the dead again solely to put him on some covers for issue 75 HEHEHE

also he’s actually a platypus in canon >0<

[yourmomsawh0r3]

Bridgerton Game Night

Anthony bridgerton x female wife reader

The Bridgerton estate was alive with the warmth of family gathered for their cherished game night. The drawing room glowed softly with candlelight, casting a cozy ambiance over the siblings and their spouses as they settled in for an evening of spirited competition.

Anthony Bridgerton, usually the epitome of poise and control, found himself at the center of playful teasing due to his enthusiastic yet often inaccurate answers during charades and trivia. He approached each game with a competitive fervor that sometimes led to comically exaggerated gestures or hasty guesses.

As the evening began with a round of charades, Anthony eagerly took to the challenge of acting out "The Three Musketeers." With exaggerated flourishes and dramatic flair, he tried to convey the essence of the classic tale, only to elicit peals of laughter from his siblings and their spouses.

Y/N, Anthony's devoted wife, watched with a fond smile, her eyes sparkling with a mixture of amusement and adoration for her husband's playful nature. She leaned in close as Anthony continued his theatrics, whispering teasingly in his ear, "Perhaps fewer theatrics and more direct clues next time, my love."

Anthony shot her a mock glare, though there was a glint of amusement in his eyes. He turned back to his siblings, who were now gently ribbing him for his enthusiastic but occasionally misguided efforts. "Anthony, you're supposed to act out the title, not perform the entire novel!" Benedict quipped, earning laughter from Eloise and Colin.

Y/N, always quick to defend her husband's honor, playfully covered Anthony's ears with her hands. "Let's not tease poor Anthony while he's trying his best," she said with a playful smile. "We can discuss his performance later, when he's not in the room."

She winked mischievously at the others, knowing full well that Anthony could hear every word. Anthony grinned in response, his amusement evident. "I heard that," he interjected playfully, his eyes meeting Y/N's with affectionate understanding.

The room erupted into laughter again, the teasing taking on a loving and lighthearted tone that only siblings who truly cherished each other could appreciate. Y/N leaned closer to Anthony, her hand resting gently on his shoulder as she leaned in to whisper, "They tease because they adore you, my dear."

Anthony nodded, a warm smile spreading across his face as he wrapped his arm around Y/N's waist, pulling her close. "And I adore every moment of it," he replied sincerely, his gaze sweeping over his siblings with a mixture of pride and affection.

As the night progressed, the Bridgerton family continued their games, each round bringing more laughter, camaraderie, and friendly competition. Anthony and Y/N's playful banter and the siblings' teasing became cherished memories that they would fondly recount in the years to come, evidence of a family bound together not only by blood but by deep love, laughter, and a shared appreciation for the joy of being together.

[convito]

Blasting Off To The Past: Chapter 1: The Customers Are Used To This By Now

Finished chapter 1 of my fanfic based on @yamujiburo's Jessie/Delia Pokemon comics. The fact that it's just the first chapter is a development that materialized roughly 5 minutes ago when I realized this thing is getting way too long to write all at once. It's just a fun little day-in-the-life story because I wanted an excuse to write these characters.

Here's the AO3 link.

Below is the full chapter text. Enjoy!

“Meowth, I demand to know why you just kicked me!” James yelled dramatically.

“Don’t flatter yourself, I wouldn’t waste my time kicking you!” Meowth

The lunch rush took its toll on everyone in different ways. For Delia, the strain kept her too busy to notice anything outside the restaurant. For Jessie, it meant Delia wasn’t looking at her.

In the case of James and Meowth, it was dealer’s choice. Today, that meant each blaming the other for the table leg they each routinely tripped over. Meowth’s thimble-sized temper had reached a boiling point. James was mad by association.

Delia had been holding down the kitchen until the commotion piqued her attention, prompting a peek around the corner into the dining area. She saw Meowth seething as his serving tray clattered to the ground, trading leers with James whose serving tray remained pristinely perched atop his fingers.

Then time stood still as she saw Jessie burst in with a face that gave her conflicting feelings, making a Beedrill-line for the bickering duo. How she heard the noise from across town would remain a mystery. The love of Delia’s life was a lit fuse heading straight for a flamboyantly colored powder keg. The focus now needed to be heading off the stormfront before it turned the restaurant into a restauNOT (she took a second to chuckle at that).

“Jessie. Babe. Sweetie.”

The red menace continued undeterred. Delia raised her voice.

“Jessie, stop! Jessie! Honey!”

Still nothing. Delia was desperate.

“STOP, DAMMIT!”

Jessie screeched to a halt, bringing the universe with her. She and her two partners in something or other all turned their heads toward Delia, three identical faces of exaggerated shock. Though Jessie’s sported a tinge of crimson.

“I… buh…” she attempted.

“Delia made a swear,” Meowth whispered.

James simply covered his ears.

But whether through shock or sheer force of Delia’s long-bided power, the situation was defused for now. The residual fallout kept things together until the restaurant finally slowed down. James and Meowth lost their abrasion around each other, more or less back to their regular selves give or take the occasional shared look towards Delia. Granted, not unlike their usual behavior.

Jessie, meanwhile, had stuck around to help however she could. At the moment, she was employing her puppy dog eye technique to try and soften Delia’s mood every time her wife looked her way. Despite coming across more like bewildered Magikarp eyes, which had Delia desperately suppressing a snort laugh at every turn, it probably would have worked even if she actually had been angry.

Eventually, closing time arrived. Jessie had finally released Delia from her fishy look and was taking a break from cleaning to watch James and Meowth. The other two former Rockets were Taurosing around with each other as they took the garbage out back. Delia noticed a wistful look in her wife’s eye. It was one she’d been seeing a lot of lately.

“You miss the adventure, don’t you?” Delia asked warmly.

Jessie gave a slight start at this before nodding. They’d grown to know each other well enough that it was no surprise Delia could read her so intimately.

“I know we weren’t the good guys going after the twe- eh, Ash and Pikachu like that,” Jessie seemed just a bit embarrassed, “but getting out there and traveling around really got my juices moving.”

“Even more than our little battling vacations?”

“W-well, I wouldn’t say…” Jessie hesitated, but she knew she never needed to hide anything from Delia, especially after all this time. “Kinda, yeah.”

Jessie’s regular trips out into the region with Delia to explore and battle gym leaders had very quickly begun to rank among the highlights of her life, and she wouldn’t trade them for anything, no matter how shiny. But…

“I just miss the camaraderie with James and Meowth,” she found herself gushing. “I miss the cartoon-level plans we came up with together, I miss the big Meowth balloon, I miss James’ camp cooking and Meowth’s snoring, not to mention-”

“I’m sorry, what was that about Meowth?”

“Oh, right, you never heard his outdoor snoring. Only happens when he’s camping. Real conker of a wavelength he could belch out, which you wouldn’t expect from a little fart like him. I think he developed it as a defense to make predators think a Snorlax is sleeping nearby or someth-”

“What?” Delia had trouble getting a word in edgewise sometimes, a trait of their relationship she oddly treasured. She liked seeing Jessie excited. “No, why would I ask to hear about…? Never mind, I meant the balloon thing.”

“Ok, yeah, that makes more sense,” Jessie admitted. “It was a thing of genuine beauty. A huge hot air balloon in the shape of Meowth. We even used official Team Rocket funds to commission it. They seemed cool with it.”

“I’d like to point out that they did very much fire you.”

“Oh yeah,” Jessie said with a guttural giggle. “Wow, things are definitely starting to make some more sense now that I say them out loud. But anyway, we used to go everywhere in that balloon. It was our own little home where we never had to deal with property tax. We’d sleep up there, have some fun by spitting off the sides, do… other things off the sides…”

“Honey, I love you but oh my god.”

“Hey, if you can think of other ways to handle being up in the air for days at a time…” Jessie’s old smug nature crept in, which she caught before going any further. “Th-the point is I just miss the balloon. It was sort of a symbol of that complete freedom we used to have. Nothing tying us down, literally. No rules. No responsibilities. No bosses or authori-” she paused, her expression that of a system reboot. “How did we not get fired sooner?”

“I didn’t realize how much you thought about that time,” Delia started to feel just a touch of guilt. Or was it jealousy?

“Not 'all the time' or anything. Some things just remind me of that past life. Like how James and Meowth have been sniping at each other a lot lately,” Jessie said with a look of dawning realization. “They must be feeling homesick too. Or, I mean ‘homesick’ I guess,” she made some halfhearted quotes with her fingers. A glance over at Delia dropped the fingers immediately as Jessie read her wife’s expression, as subtle as it was.

Jessie wordlessly walked over to Delia, not rushing, not holding back, simply going. She took her hands in her own and clasped them.

“I am happier now than I’ve ever been,” Jessie answered a wordless question. There was no need to explore the topic further. This is the most she’d talked about the old days since, she realized, that awkward time when she, James, and Meowth had shown up on Delia’s doorstep completely out of options. It was enough that she got it out.

Delia just smiled. It was a genuine smile, but one that obscured hidden depths. Depths that ironically flew right over Jessie’s head.

Once they finished closing, Jessie and Delia stepped out of the restaurant hand in hand, following James and Meowth who had apparently regained their passion for griping. Jessie paid little attention as they fired quips back and forth, sounding to her like synthesized speech from a Nintendo 64 game. She was content where she was, blissfully strolling home with the love of her life. No thoughts, just vibes.

If she’d only opened her eyes, she’d have seen the poorly-hidden look of sneaky determination emblazoned on Delia’s face.

-the next morning-

“Ash!” Delia burst into her son’s room. “We’re making a balloon!”

[mysterious-ocarina]

My Darling (NSFW)

Sub!Charles Xavier x female!reader

Main Masterlist Requests

(2.6k words)

A/N this doesn’t necessarily take place in the canon timeline, somewhere near First Class is what I was imagining. I got inspiration for your mutation from poison ivy from dc comics

“It’s a very groovy muta…”

You couldn’t bring yourself to listen anymore, turning back around to face Raven with a sigh.

“I don’t need to be a mind reader to know what you’re thinking about,” Raven nudged you. You grew up with the two mutants, arriving a few years after Raven. Being the only other female, you became very close, pretty much like sisters.

“Well, what should I be thinking?” you asked with a sad look on your face.

“That we both know, you’re the only girl that Charles has had his eyes on,” Raven replied. She was under the delusion that Charles reciprocated your feelings.

“Tell that to the girl that he is literally staring at. He even used that stupid mutation line on her,” you sighed, pointing at the two of them, the girl laughing at something Charles said.

“Yeah, but he uses that line on all the girls. It’s not anything special and neither is she,” she reassured you. Before you could say anything back you watched as the girl flirtatiously walked away from Charles, offering him a small wave.

You summoned a vine, putting it in front of the woman’s heels. Both you and Raven giggled as she tripped and walked off embarrassed. Hearing your giggles, Charles looked at you, briefly hearing your thoughts.

Walking over to you guys, he admonished, “Why would you do that?”

“Do what?” you replied innocently before pettily turning your back to him, fire red hair flipping behind you. “I think I’m going to head back to the mansion, I’m getting tired.”

You quickly walked off, not waiting for a reply. Back at the mansion, you sluggishly walked past Erik who regarded you with concern. “What’s up with you?”

“A groovy mutation,” you mockingly replied, stopping your footsteps. “Is there something wrong with me? Does he really only see me as another sister?”

Surprised by your outburst, Erik calmly responded, “So, this is about Charles.”

“Of course this is about him. I’m going to grow old and become a crazy cat lady. And the only thing I’ll be known for is being Professor X’s sister. Not, his lover, his girlfriend, his wife, not even some girl he occasionally sleeps with,” you ranted. You tended to be temperamental and dramatic, so your rant wasn’t that off putting for Erik to listen to.

“You know, you could always just tell him how you feel,” Erik offered, making you sigh.

“He can read minds, for Christ's sake. I shouldn’t have to tell him anything,” you finished. You sulked all the way outside to the gardens.

Coming up to your favorite tree, you made a series of soft vines into the shape of a hammock for you to lay on. This was something you commonly did when you needed a break or you needed to calm down.

When Charles and Raven got home to the mansion, Charles went off to find you. He loved spending time with you, especially in the late hours of the night. These were the times you were most comfortable with each other, often involved in deep conversation. It was these late nights that made you fall in love with each other, not that you knew of Charles’ feelings.

Charles, looking out the window, saw you curled up in vines under your tree. Grabbing his softest blankets and a few pillows, he made his way outside to you.

“Are you awake?” Charles whispered.

You groggily turned around, barely replying with a hum, and falling right back asleep.

Charles smiled dreamily at your sleeping form, projecting the image of a calm meadow into your mind. He softly placed one of the pillows under your head then placed the other one next to yours. Crawling into the vined hammock, Charles placed the blankets over the both of you before falling into a dreamless sleep.

When you woke the next morning, you were surprised to find not only soft blankets covering you but also strong arms holding you close to a firm chest. Turning around slowly you found a peaceful Charles still sleeping. You snuggled closer into his chest, not wanting the moment to end.

Charles rustled next to you, “Good morning.”

Wow, his voice is so sexy like this, you thought. “Morning.”

Charles smiled at you, you hoped he didn’t hear your last thought.

“How did you sleep?” he asked you.

“I slept amazing actually. I dreamt of a beautiful forest scene,” you replied, raising your eyebrow at him. He often would give you good dreams, especially if you weren’t sleeping well. You had gotten so used to it, that you could tell the difference between dreams you actually had, and ones that he gave you.

“I found you out here, last night, and I didn’t want you to get cold or anything,” Charles replied bashfully.

“I’m not complaining, am I?” you sassily replied.

Charles simply just brought you closer to his chest. You both laid there for most of the day until Charles was needed by Hank.

As soon as you could, you went to find Raven. She was in the middle of a conversation with Erik when you found her. You grabbed her, urgently telling Erik, “Sorry, it’s very important. I need Raven right now.”

“What the hell?” Raven asked you once you made it to your room. You explained what you woke up to this morning, making her even more giddy than you were.

“This is perfect. He’s definitely into you,” Raven offered excitedly.

“Well what do I do about it?” you asked. You

“You should make your move tonight after dinner,” Raven explained. She then went into a detailed fake scenario about what will happen. You tuned her out to think of your own plan.

After your talk with Raven, you ended up taking a short nap. When you woke up, you realized you would be late for dinner, so you quickly freshened up and made your way down.

You could hear the usual commotion of dinner, except it sounded a bit more hectic than usual. Upon walking into the dining area you noticed three things. First, your chair that was usually between Charles and Raven, was broken to pieces in its spot. Next, you saw Hank and Alex wrestle about on the floor. Then last, you noticed an annoyed Charles, a bemused Raven, and a thrilled Erik.

“What the hell happened?” you questioned. At the sound of your voice, the two boys on the ground got up swiftly, pointing a finger at each other.

“The boys thought to bring their wrestle match inside. Your chair as well as a couple unsuspecting vases were victims of this,” Charles explained with a sigh.

“Well where do I sit?” you asked. Neither Hank or Alex made eye contact with you, not wanting to give up their seats.

“What about Charles' leg? I want you to still be next to me, but you would crush my small thighs,” Raven smirked at you. You knew exactly what she was trying to suggest, you just hoped that Charles didn’t pick up on it.

“I’m okay with that,” Charles replied, scooting his chair out a bit so you could fit.

Softly sitting on his lap, with a blush, you complimented, “Ever the gentleman.”

From there, thankfully, dinner went as usual. Noone seemed to care about you sitting on Charles lap. You were embarrassed and nervous the entire time, but no one seemed to pay any mind, except Raven who throughout your conversation was giving you slight smirks. Eventually, Raven was talking to Hank in front of you, so you were quietly finishing your food.

Finishing your food, you leaned back onto Charles. He coughed but said nothing. Turning around to look at him, you moved and you felt something under you. With direct eye contact with Charles, you softly moved your hips to confirm your suspicions.

That definitely won’t help, Charles breathily informed you in your mind. Be a good girl, and keep still.

With a blush, you replied, And if I don’t want to?

Charles gave you a raised brow in surprise. You hoped that you weren’t too forward or made him uncomfortable. The longer he took to reply, the more disappointed you got that he did not share your feelings.

As you were about to get up, Charles held your waist down. Softly rubbing one of your arms, he offered, Don’t worry Darling. I’m not opposed, I was just a bit taken by surprise. I assumed you saw me as nothing more than an adoptive brother.

Facing forward again to not alarm anyone to your silent conversation, I definitely don’t think of you as a brother.

You reassured your statement with a soft grind onto the hardened bulge in his pants. He breathed in your ear, gripping your arm tightly.

Keep grinding, and see what happens, Charles hinted.

Grinding harder against him, you replied, What are you thinking?

I’m thinking about taking you right on this table, he tried sounding harsh but the pleasure you were giving him only made him sound desperate.

Aww, are you that sensitive? Imagine what it will feel like when I do this without our clothes in the way, you seductively teased.

Charles shifted, letting out an almost silent whine. You looked around to see if anyone heard but everyone was too busy in their own conversations. You shifted again before ordering, I would be quiet if I were you Charles. We don’t want anyone to know about your little problem.

With a hard grind, you emphasized, Or should I call it a big problem?

Charles lightly panted behind you and if you saw his face, you would have seen it brushed with a red tint.

What do you say we sneak out of here? Charles almost begged.

Now that would be rude to leave in the middle of dinner, with that you turned to Raven and started a conversation with her, ignoring him.

Throughout the rest of dinner, you would shift just to tease Charles. He was squeezing your waist as a way to control himself. You noticed him to be a complete mess and when someone talked to him, you would start grinding making him stutter his words. 

When dinner was over, which Charles would claim was hours long, you two were the last to leave.

When you finally got up, you turned around to observe Charles. His face was incredibly flushed, his pants looked a bit too tight on his bulge, and there was even a small spot of precum darkening his pants.

“Do I truly have this kind of effect on you?” you questioned with a blush.

He simply got closer to you, kissing you with so much passion you thought you would fall over. It felt like fireworks finally being able to kiss him. Your whole body flushed, and you felt your panties get even more wet than they were before.

“I’ve been wanting to kiss you for years,” he told you. “So yes, you very much do have that effect on me.”

“Then take me to your room, Professor,” you addressed. You watched as his eyes darkened at the use of his title. He held your hand as you both swiftly made your way to his room.

Once in his room, you softly urged him towards his bed. You continued your kiss, sitting on his lap. He had his hands exploring as much of your body as he could reach, your hands simply running through his hair.

I wonder if I should pull it, you briefly thought. Charles moaned into your mouth. You stopped kissing him to give an experimental tug on his soft hair, forcing a loud groan to come from his mouth.

“Oh, is that what you want, Professor?” you teased, with a smirk.

He simply nodded in response, grinding you on him harder.

Getting off of him, you replied, “I think I need words, Professor. What do you want me to do to you tonight?”

With a flushed face and panting breath, he begged, “Please, I need you to fuck me.”

“Such lewd words, Charles,” you teased, before summoning vines to wrap around his wrists, connecting him to the bed. He whined in protest to your actions. “I don’t think you’re allowed to touch me yet, Professor.”

You straddled his waist and resumed kissing him. With his hands tied, he wasn’t able to touch you the way that he wanted to, sending a short, please, into your mind. You ignored him to kiss all around his face and neck.

You slowly kissed down his neck, finding his sweet spots and making him moan. You made marks along his neck, then his collarbones, making your way all the way down.

You softly ran your nails down his abs making him shiver in pleasure. You gave slight pecks and licks until you got to his v-line, “Should I take off your pants, Professor?”

“Please, darling,” he whined. You pulled his pants off, but left his briefs off.

Rubbing him through his briefs, watching the wet pot of precum get bigger, you teased,” I quite like the way you look. Sitting under me, you look so handsome.”

Blushing at your compliment, he wiggled his hips, urging you to touch him. You obliged by bringing your mouth close to the tent in his briefs and blowing hot air on to him.

“Please touch me, darling. I want you to fuck me,” Charles all but cried.

“Whatever you want, honey,” you replied as you finally pulled his briefs down his legs. At the sight of his cock hitting his stomach, you quickly got up to shed all of your clothes. Charles admired your naked body, wishing that he could touch you and please you.

You sat back on his naked thighs to touch him. As your fingers rubbed his cock, he let out a loud moan that had arousal pooling in you. You quickly got on your knees and sank your body fully on him.

He felt so good, stretching you out, that you let out an erotic cry that had him twitching inside you. “You like my cunt, honey?”

“Yes, you feel absolutely perfect,” he complimented. Fully adjusted to his length, you finally started to move. You place your hands on his chest for balance and set a pulsing rhythm.

You decided that you teased Charles enough, so you let the vines wrapped around him go, letting him move freely. He swiftly grabbed your hips, pounding into you.

The rhythm and speed at which Charles was pounding you with, had him touching the right spots, making you quiver in his arms. He brought a hand down to your clit, rubbing it harshly.

“Are you close, Professor?” you asked breathily. He nodded his head in response. “Well that’s too bad, you aren’t allowed to come until I do.”

He whined in protest but kept going at a harsh pace. He flipped you over, hitting the perfect spot inside of you. You moaned and shook under him, approaching your orgasm.

“Make me cum, handsome,” you whispered. At your command, he brought his hand back down to your clit. He rubbed you inside and out with such passion that he had you cumming quickly and blissfully. You moaned out his name, squeezing around him, making him cum too.

Laying down peacefully next to him, you both dreamily stared at each other.

“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” Charles softly whispered to you.

You smiled back at him, “You too, handsome.”

As you were drifting to sleep, Charles asked you, “Will you be my Darling forever?”

“I want nothing more,” you replied, giving him a soft kiss.

[lauronk]

I was watching a movie (that one with natalie portman) and I got an Idea. A ficlet where joel is a professional hitman (or a retired one) and ellie is his daughter. She loves him, and he is devoted for her. He is wrapped around her little finger and he knows that.

What he doesn't tell her tho? he actually killed her father for his client. He only realized there was a baby in the house when it was too late. The truth eats him alive everyday, but he will never tell her. Never.

hi anon! thank you for this prompt, it fully latched into my brain and derailed the other stuff i had planned on working on lmao i hope you enjoy!

(this time baby) i’ll be bulletproof

length: ~2.6k words

tags: pov joel; joel & ellie; modern au; death/murder; brief mentions of blood; tess is alive; kidnapping; ellie’s whole life is a lie she just doesn’t know it; joel’s a hitman so what do you expect; joel’s also a great dad, what did you expect; no beta we die like david

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Gentle finger squeeze on the trigger. Exhale.

The target drops before he even realizes he’s been shot, a small pool of blood gathering on the carpet underneath his head. The man had been nice enough - not that he’d realized it - to leave his window open, so there wasn’t even the shattering of glass to alert anyone. He’d be found in an hour or so, when his wife returned home from her nail appointment, and by then, Joel would be long gone.

-

Sometimes he regretted the path he’d wound up on, the way his life had diverged from everything it should have been. Joel could look back and pinpoint exactly where the fork had occurred - his daughter, a victim of the wrong place at the wrong time, one man so bent on vengeance he didn’t care who he’d hurt in the process.

He had been the first one Joel had ever killed. Twenty years later, and he hadn’t stopped.

Only difference was, now he got paid for it, and handsomely at that.

-

The television is still on when Joel opens the front door, and he pauses, hand on the knob. It’s entirely too late for anyone else to still be awake, and he turns his head towards the dark hallway that branches off the living room towards the back of the house.

He makes sure he makes a fair amount of noise in the process of taking off his shoes and hanging up his keys. His pistol he secures in the safe over the fireplace, making sure it’s locked again before he slides the wall panel back in place. The TV he shuts off, and he pours a glass of water before finally making his way down the hall to the second door on the left.

“Ellie?” Joel knocks gently before pressing a hand against the door and nudging it open.

She gives an exaggerated deep breath, and Joel chuckles, stepping all the way into her room. He can make out the shape of her under her covers, curled on her side, a faint hint of moonlight trickling through the window.

The glass of water he deposits on her nightstand - he knows she’ll want it later - and lowers himself carefully to sit on her mattress near her hip. Her breathing picks up and then slows again, like she thinks he hasn’t already caught on.

“C’mon, baby,” Joel shakes her shoulder gently, his voice teasing. “I know you ain’t sleepin’.”

Ellie rolls over, blinking at him owlishly. She even brings a hand up to rub her eyes, widening them comically like she’s surprised to see him. “Dad?”

“TV didn’t shut off all the way,” Joel tells her helpfully, snorting when her hand immediately falls from her face and her head flops back dramatically on her pillow.

“Fuck.”

He tucks the comforter around her a little more tightly, brushing a stray piece of hair back from her forehead. “Yeah.” Her hand comes up and wraps around his wrist, squeezing gently. “You’re pretty busted, kiddo.”

Ellie shakes the hand holding his, waggling his arm around. “Why do I even still have a bedtime? I’m fourteen. Dina and Jesse don’t have bedtimes.”

He shakes his arm right back, eliciting a small giggle from her. “Dina and Jesse ain’t been caught sneakin’ out recently, have they? Maybe that’s got somethin’ to do with it, hmm?”

Ellie huffs, but she doesn’t argue. She had been busted after all, caught down at the neighborhood pool with some other kids by Marlene, the HOA president, and brought to his door dripping wet at one a.m. Bedtime and curfew had been reinstated after that, and Ellie had three more months of probation from him before it would be lifted.

It didn’t feel good to do - he’d struggled with punishing Sarah at all too - but it let him give free rein to some of his paranoia, gave him an excuse to keep her locked in the house a little more. It wouldn’t last forever - nor should it, Joel knew well and good that Ellie needed to go out and live her own life - but while she was still young enough, he’d shield her from everything he could.

Sarah hadn’t made it to fifteen - Joel was determined to see that Ellie did.

“Get some sleep, baby girl,” he tells her softly, brushing his fingers back and forth across her forehead in the way he knows will soothe her to sleep best. It’s worked since she was a baby, and sure enough her eyes are already drifting closed. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Waffles?” Ellie mumbles, rolling on her side and burying her face into her pillow.

Joel smiles down at her, feeling that same tug behind his heart that he has every time since he first held her. “Yeah, baby, we’ll do waffles.”

This time, her breathing deepens out naturally, mouth falling slack, and Joel bends forward to press a kiss to her temple. “Dream somethin’ good,” he whispers, same as he does every night. He ain’t superstitious - can’t afford to be, in his line of work - but he’s always been afraid that the nights he hasn’t been around to tell her, she’ll have nightmares.

Joel shuts the door behind him, padding back through the living room to double check the locks on the doors and windows and set the alarm. When he’s sure they’re as secure as can be, he makes his way back down to his room. He can’t fight the urge to open Ellie’s door one more time and peek in on her; she hasn’t moved, not that he expected her to.

His own room is dark, blackout curtains preventing even a hint of moonlight coming in. He’d wanted to put the same curtains in Ellie’s room for safety, but she’d put her foot down - I need to see the fucking sun, Dad - and Joel had relented. Her room faced the backyard, and they had no neighbors on that side, just a tall fence with motion sensors spaced carefully along it.

Joel doesn’t bother with a lamp, instead making his way straight through to his bathroom and flicking on the light there. As always, he avoids the sight of his reflection, instead turning his back on the mirror and flipping the handle on the shower. He cranks it as hot as he’ll be able to stand and tugs off his clothes, tossing them into a small pile on the floor. He’ll have to do laundry in the morning, get the first load going before Ellie’s awake.

The bathroom is already filling with steam by the time Joel steps under the spray, the water immediately stinging his skin like a thousand small needles. It immediately starts to soothe the aches in his body though, and Joel turns slowly until it’s beating between his shoulder blades.

He’s getting too old for this. Fifty-six, with nearly twenty years of it under his belt. He’s still deadly, sure, one of the best to ever do it as Tess so frequently tells him.

But his recovery times are slower, his reflexes dulling. His already damaged hearing in his right ear is only getting worse.

He’s not far from being a liability - he knows what they do to liabilities.

And he’s got Ellie to think of.

Joel rotates again, sticks his head under the water and lets it sluice down over his face.

He’ll bring it up with Tess soon, Joel thinks. He doesn’t know what the protocol is here - few in his line of work live long enough for it to be a consideration - but they’ll work something out. Better for him to get out now, after a damn near perfect record, while he’s still got enough health and energy to spend with his daughter.

Better that than him getting old and slow, getting sloppy and getting caught.

He shuts the water off and tugs the towel around his waist. The rest of his evening routine he does by rote - dressing, brushing his teeth, turning down his bed - and by the time his head hits the pillow, Joel’s able to slip straight into sleep.

-

He doesn’t usually dream when he sleeps - a side effect, he’d guess, of the way he lives his life. Maybe there’d been nightmares at first, flashes of the lives he’d taken, faint remembrances. But those had stopped with enough time and blood, and his sleep became peaceful again.

Not this night, though.

-

The hallways stretching before him is dark and long, shadows stretching out like fingers, and Joel walks silently as close to the wall as he dares. The floor is less likely to squeak there, but too close to the wall and he’ll brush against a frame or hanging, send it crashing to the ground. Easiest way to get caught, if you’re stupid.

And Joel Miller ain’t stupid.

The first two rooms - a study and a guest room - are clear. Tonight’s unfortunate soul is a widower, a man whose increasingly large debts to Joel’s employer were beyond the point of repayment. Nothing left to do but put the man out of his misery, leave the murky back-end of liquidating the man’s assets to the techies. His only job was making it look natural.

The third room is the master, a four poster bed in the middle, the target in question asleep under the covers.

It’s almost absurdly easy, and Joel leaves the body behind with a mental note to ask Tess for something more challenging next time. He doesn’t know what it says about him that this murder felt boring, but he doesn’t bother dwelling on it.

This is who he is now.

Joel does a final check, sweeping the hall with a flashlight to make sure he left no trace. He’s just clicked the light off when he hears it - a muffled sound of some sort, coming from the only door he hasn’t checked.

Joel advances, feet light, and draws his pistol as he approaches the door, turn the knob slowly with a gloved hand. A faint beam of light meets his eyes, and Joel blinks, inhaling slowly to keep his heart rate low as his eyes adjust.

The sound echoes again, and Joel pushes the door open carefully, pausing when the hinges emit the faintest squeak. Nothing stirs inside, no other sound follows.

Might be a dog or cat, Joel reasons with himself. Wouldn’t be the first time.

After another moment of stillness, he nudges the door open further, eyes scanning back and forth over the room. Taking in the bookshelf, the night light, the tall dresser, the —

The crib against the wall.

Joel’s hand falls limp next to his side, pistol dangling from numb fingertips.

He doesn’t do parents. He’s made that clear to Tess and her bosses a thousand times over. He’ll kill just about anyone, but not if they’ve got kids, and especially not if those kids still live at home. Tess knows - she knows - that’s a hard line for him. So either he was lied to when given the file, or their intel had been bad and they hadn’t known.

But there is - a chubby hand lifts from the crib - there is a baby in the crib. A small, now orphaned child.

Joel orphaned them.

He tucks the pistol into the back of his jeans and takes a careful step closer. And then another, and another, until he’s right next to the crib, hands gripping the railing as he peers down.

Bright brown eyes are staring back up at him, chubby cheeks framing an open mouth. The blanket covering most of her body reads Ellie.

“Ellie,” Joel repeats softly. “‘s that your name?”

A chubby fist waves up at him as if in response.

He should leave. He needs to leave. The job’s done, and the longer he stays here the longer he risks getting caught or leaving behind a trail.

But Ellie is staring up at him from her crib, rosebud mouth opening and closing and little babbles escaping.

He should leave.

But instead Joel bends down, hands carefully scooping underneath her back until she’s cradled against his chest. She rests there easily, something like a contented sigh - if he thought babies could make such a noise - escaping her. The warmth of her against him has something in his chest fracturing, splintering, breaking wide open. All the pieces of him seem to realign, and without thought Joel bends down to pick up her blanket. There’s a nearly full diaper bag by the door, and Joel snags that too.

Ellie doesn’t stir against him as they exit the house through the back and Joel winds them through the trees lining the back of the property. He doesn’t have a car seat, he realizes. He’ll need to get one of those - for the time being Joel lowers himself to sit in the backseat of the car with Ellie still held against him.

He’ll call Tess, Joel decides, back of his finger stroking gently over Ellie’s cheek. She can come get him, get someone else to get his car out of here. She’ll be mad, probably more than a little freaked out, but it ain’t for her to worry about.

Ellie’s his.

She stretches a bit, a small fist making contact with his neck. Immediately Joel starts to rub her back, low voice murmuring in her ear.

“It’s okay, baby girl. I got you.”

-

Joel blinks awake, the familiar sight of his ceiling coming in to focus above him. He doesn’t dream about the night he found Ellie very often, but every time he does it’s as clear as if it had just happened.

A glance at the clock on his nightstand shows it’s nearing on eight, which means Ellie’ll probably be up soon.

He totes his laundry basket down the hall to the laundry room, hitting the power button on the coffee maker when he passes. He’ll get the laundry going, his coffee made, the waffle batter started. And then they can have breakfast together, figure out how they want to spend their Wednesday. It’s summer, so Ellie’s out of school, and he’s off for the day.

Joel strolls over to the window facing the backyard as he sips his coffee, waffle batter made and sitting in the fridge. He’d moved around a lot before Ellie - hazard of the job - but he’d wanted her to have stability, safety. It made it trickier, meant he could take fewer jobs, but he’d stashed up enough money to make that less of a concern.

Tess had predictably lost her shit when she’d found Joel in the back of his car, Ellie snoozing against Joel, but within a matter of hours he’d had a crib and enough supplies to last two weeks. Within three days he’d had a birth certificate listing a dead woman as Ellie’s mother and Joel as her father. Any trace of her in the target’s house had been swiftly and carefully eradicated.

And Ellie had never known about any of it. If Joel had his way, she never would.

A yawn from behind him has Joel turning around, smile spreading across his cheeks at the sight of Ellie shuffling across the living room towards him in her pajamas, hair tousled and eyes half-open. She all but collapses against him, head thunking against his chest as she yawns again.

“Waffles?”

Joel chuckles, dropping a kiss to the top of her head. “C’mon, sleepyhead, let’s get you some waffles.”

There was nothing more important to Joel than his daughter. And nothing he wouldn’t do to keep her from learning the truth.

[illym]

Miss Dizzy (covered in blood) if you’re reading this I am free on Thursday night. If you would like to hang out I am free on Thursday night when I am free to hang out.

Kind of in love with how meta this one is.

I referred heavily to the official GGXX (Dizzy ED 1&2) script for this one, but as always, if you understand Japanese and retranslate this, let me know.

ID in alt.

Cleaned and original comics under the cut.

I've just realized that not everybody has played Guilty Gear XX, so I'll supply context.

You reach Dizzy's Ending 1 by losing the last battle against I-no. In GGXX, there are routes and endings you can reach by losing battles, unlike Accent Core. The comic is making fun of how the player / Dizzy has lost against I-no 7 (and now, 8) times, making this the 7th/8th time they've gotten ending 1 instead of ending 2.

For her Ending 2, you have to beat I-no in that battle and then beat her once again. Between those two battles, Dizzy loses control of herself and her powers (giving the player Dizzy's boss powers for the next fight). At the end of the fight, Dizzy is about to lose complete control of her powers when Sol comes around and stops them. In the game, Dizzy has a very demure CG where she holds a hand to her chest, relieved that she's regained control of her powers and herself.

The joke here is that Dizzy isn't demure and innocent; she's covered in blood and utterly pissed at I-no for the difficulty of the boss fight.

If you're curious to watch the endings yourself, KillerForte has uploaded them on Youtube.

My beautiful wife, the Copy Stamp...

Anyway this might compete for 'favorite comic that doesn't involve a favorite character', because. Look at dizzy. Fucking look at her. Daisuke if you bring Dizzy back for Strive please cover her in blood.

Nothing to say here, translation wise. I-no uses a specific term in Japanese for [ woman or girl who acts cute by playing innocent and helpless ], [ ぶりっこ ]. Wish we had something like that in English; facade and deceptive don't clarify what the facade IS.

I've had this on my agenda to translate for ages, but always got intimidated out of it because of the tons of messy and complex fonts / handwriting. And then it turned out super easy. There's a message there.

@.yomotsu-hirasaka helped me check over April's call-out and the I-no in the first panel.

I-no's hot here. It's always great when she inflicts violence on others without threatening other forms of harm *cough, cough, Bridget AC Path 2*.

[dc-worse-dad-poll]

“slade was a GOOD father”-tales of teen titans 44

i’m sure that counts for something

he like

immediately fucked that up majorly…but it’d be funny if he got eliminated

tales of the teen titans (1984) #44

i am genuinely trying to remain unbiased in this whole poll (except in small things that are funny, not annoying, like the poll photos) but if you are mentioning slade wilson it is my duty to tear him to pieces.

for context, Tales of the Teen Titans #44 is the introduction to Joey and also explains Slade's backstory. which we do not need to get into the gritty details of, but it's actually similar to Captain America in Marvel except Slade is a piece of shit about it.

grant is born while slade is in the army still and joey is born while he's a hunter but before he's deathstroke. but slade switches to being deathstroke FAST and starts using his family as a cover. who will think the old guy at the PTA meetings who hosts big parties and loves his kids and treats his wife properly will be deathstroke the fucking mercenary?

deathstroke inc (2021) #15

and here's the thing. anyone who reads a deathstroke or wilson family kid's comics knows that slade does genuinely love his family, in his own twisted way. which is why he's such a bad dad. for this, i always cite the same fucking comics because it's so fucking good.

teen titans (2003) #78

the thing about slade is that he's going to be a terrible father and person no matter what. but he loves his kids, so he justifies all those terrible things by saying he loves them and is trying to keep them safe. which is fucking bonkers, because if he really wanted them out of his life, he'd stop going after them. like how he puts out a bounty on rose in deathstroke (2016) #2.

this is the guy who would rather save his ego and reputation than his own son. whose actions resulted in the death of his eldest and he proceeded to blame on a bunch of teenagers with a vengeance. and slade is fantastic at justifying his shitty as actions and making himself seem either not that bad or like he's been wronged.

and just like slade always chases after his kids, always brings them back and treats them like utter shit, his kids always go back to him, too.

more panels from teen titans #77-78, but honestly just read any comic with him and the kids and you'll get this "i hate you i love you please change for me" dynamic.

so. sure, you can argue that slade used to be a good dad, but it's pretty obvious in any wilson family reading that he's always used his family to further his own desires.

even with grant, when he found him again as ravager, it was to use grant for a job, not because he loved and missed his son. and then he justifies that by raging a war against the titans for generations in Grant's name.

so. yeah. slade's love always comes broken and with some sort of asterisk. he's a good dad when it benefits him. he's a bad one when it benefits him. because that's the kind of person he is. so addie is saying he was a good father because that's the show he was putting on for her and the kids.

[drifting-pieces-blog-blog]

Breaking down the comics: Soldiers (Punisher Annual #2: Knight Fall)

You guys. YOU GUYS. 

I am so excited to bring you this next one for SO MANY REASONS. 

The first reason is that this is the FIRST Moon Knight comic I ever read. 

And this comic os pure WTFer set off an obsession that has directed the course of my life for over ten years now. 

Marc Spector: Moon Knight

Punisher Annual #2: Knight Fall. 1989

Written by: Mike Baron

Art by: Bill Reinhold

Gerbil: Tom DeFalco

(Tom is the editor in chief for Marvel at the time) 

We got ourselves a Punisher Annual with a Moon Knight guest appearance! 

Now I’ve talked about guest appearances again and again and again. It usually means that the guest star is going to show up HUGE on the cover with some dramatic depiction in an attempt to lure in more new readers to the title comic. 

But look at this comic cover. This isn’t Moon Knight showing up to save the day or in a little blurb bubble or box. He’s battling Frank! This looks more like a cross-over style comic! Those always depict the main character FIGHTING the other guest star! And damn if this cover isn’t amazing. Look at those two locked in close quarter combat! And that dagger! This might be a Punisher comic, but Moon Knight isn’t about to roll over! 

Now, as we all have come to expect, when you have a crossover for the first time, the two characters always spend the first couple pages fighting in some misunderstanding before they make up and team together to fight the real bad guys. But Punisher takes no quarter and Moon Knight is grumpy at best. 

Alright, so we open up on a Long Island Petshop where a Mr. Morton is purchasing Gerbils for their kids. 

For those that do not know, a Gerbil is about the size of a large mouse with a long tufted tail and kangaroo like hind feet. They're fast, bite hard, and are fun. (I used to own them as a kid for many years and loved them).

 They actually aren’t that well known, even though you can always find them in pet shops next to the hamsters. I wonder why they chose gerbil over say, mice or rats or hamsters. I get the feeling there was some inside joke among the writers here. 

…..Oh. 

Snake guy. Got it. 

MARC. 

Marc… “That man just ate a gerbil! Why does it set off all my emergency alarm bells?” 

Marc… 

So... After that... Marc calls up Frenchie on his radio and tells him that he's tailing a car and gives him details on the vehicle. 

"Oui, Marc, what's up?" 

"I'm not sure... Maybe nothing." 

MARC SPECTOR. You just watched a man eat a gerbil in a pet shop....WHOLE. What do you mean 'Nothing'?!

He tails the car to an old run down mansion . 

"That's the old Borgwardt estate--It's been taken over by something called Save Our Society... Time to head home." 

Frenchie confirms the car info with Marc. It is registered to the SOS non-profit agency that is privately funded by physicians. 

"Sort of an east coast version of the Betty Ford Clinic. Why would a man eat a gerbil?" 

Marc… You have fought werewolves. You fought a literal rat king. We’ve seen you fight ghosts and get your ass handed to you by a snake. 

AND WHAT ARE YOU WEARING!? Does Steven know you’re wearing his clothes? 

He asks Frenchie to dig into the petstore's files and get him a credit card for the guy that ate the gerbil and an address. 

Meanwhile, we meander on over to the star of our show: 

"Punisher's War Journal-- I've been on the trail of Ralph Newton, a junkie who makes a living ripping off old ladies' social security checks. Two weeks ago he pushed a seventy year old woman down a flight of stairs and she died. Newton seemed to have disappeared, butt now I have a lead--This shooting gallery in the Bronx." 

For those of you unaware of the Punisher, here's a brief howdy-do for you! 

The Punisher, AKA, Frank Castle. Originally a VietNam vet who came back with a little PTSD. His family (wife and child) were murdered by the mafia and Frank decided he'd had enough of evil in the world. He makes it his life's work to hunt down and kill anyone that makes it a living to hurt people. 

Historically, the other heroes (ESPECIALLY DareDevil and Captain America) despise Frank and often rally the other heroes to try to hunt him down and stop him from continuing his war on crime. 

He got his start in a Spider-Man comic of all places and branched out from there. 

Frank is a pretty gruff and serious man and depending on who is writing him and what series you are reading, he can be pretty violent. 

War Journal was a very popular series where he drives around in his Battle Van and writes about his missions. It works nicely because Frank isn’t much of a social man. So if you rely on the story conversations, like in all the other comics, you aren’t going to get much. But having him writing things down in his journal you get a beautiful narration that reads like a Noir film and you also get a fantastic way to get to know Frank and how he thinks. I appreciate it. 

Often when Frank meets up with other heroes, there is a fight with them telling him he's wrong for killing and them eventually trying to stop him. 

Now, we know he's going to meet up with Marc in this. And I am so excited for you guys to see this epic encounter. 

So we see Frank in his usual attire walk up to a safe house and knock on the door. 

He gets the guy to open the door posing as a seller. 

Yeah. By now, everyone knows what it means when they see that skull design. 

"Junkies. I swear they don't feel pain. You've got to break something before they stop coming at you." 

Frank shoots all but one. He tells the remaining guy he's looking for Newton. 

Lucky for the junkie he says he last saw Newton going into a rehab clinic saying he was going to get straight. 

So Frank heads up to the clinic. It's a Save Our Society clinic. 

"The place reeks of sweat and stale cigarettes, ashtrays filled to overflowing." 

Man that's good Noir. 

Frank walks up to the main desk (in his street clothes, which just means he put on a turtle neck and a coat). 

"Department of social services. I'm here to verify our use of federal funds." 

"I'm sorry, sir. There must be some mistake. This clinic is privately funded --we receive no federal funds." 

"*SIGH* Sounds like another department screw-up. Could I speak to your director?" 

(What works about this is that no one actually knows what Frank Castle looks like! He doesn’t need a disguise. Everyone knows him by what he wears. They see the giant skull and the guns. It WORKS. And Frank is surprisingly good at acting. He knows the system.) 

He's told that the director isn't in. She's Leona Hiss. (Hiss? Really? We're going there?) 

Frank heads to get info from Microchip. Hey! Microchip! I missed him! 

Microchip was Frank's old tech guy. He was the man in the van that would give Frank info and hack into things for him. 

I'd say they were good friends...But Frank doesn't have friends. I'd give you spoilers on what eventually happens to Microchip but... It's kinda a BIG spoiler and maybe someone here wants to head on over into Punisher land. So I'll leave it at that. (I came to Moon Knight from Punisher land. It was all thanks to this crossover comic… so I guess their ploy really does work sometimes.) 

Anyways... Microchip looks up this Leona Hiss person. 

A widow of an anesthesiologist who started the clinics to help drug addicts. He goes on and on and tells Frank it "Smells like a smoke screen. All her life, the lady shuns publicity. Now all of a sudden she's a big philanthropist?" 

Man, look at that light and shadow in the first panel. This art team is amazing. 

Frank sets up position on a roof across from the clinic. 

"Clock Street's eerily alive at two A.M. I see a knife fight, several drug deals...Lights are burning in the clinic but no one's entered or left. There are guards on the roof. Better move.

I take position a block away, behind the clinic. I can easily make my way back over the rooftops--Nobody's watching back here. Overhead, a faint Whoosh. Some kind of high-tech chopper." 

Oh boy. Oh boy. Oh boy. 

(This art. This art is SLAYING.) 

Oh man. Look at this meet up. Frank and his shotgun, Moon Knight facing him down. 

They know who each other are! Every time Moon Knight meets up with someone he has to introduce himself! No one knows who he is! But Frank knows him. And Moon Knight doesn’t call him Frank. He knows who he is dealing with. 

Oh man, that cover called for such an epic showdown. Both ex-marines. Both know how to handle themselves. 

Uh. 

“I presume we’re both interested in Save Our Society.” 

“Right this afternoon I saw a man eat a gerbil. He came from here.” 

“What’s his name?” 

"Helmut Snead. He used a solen credit card. Six feet, brown eyes, scar above his left eye." 

"Ralph Newton--A Junkie Murderer. What's he doing on Long Island?" 

"I don't know--But he didn't look like a junkie. I want to know how he got out of the South Bronx and into a fancy clinic." 

"How would you take this guy out?"

WHAT IS HAPPENING. 

This is incredible. You have no idea. 

Frank doesn't have friends. Frank doesn't do team-ups. Frank is brutal and tells it like it is. 

And this isn't Frank being the victim to a new writer making nice in someone else's ball park. This is a PUNISHER comic. Moon Knight is the visitor. 

And on that note... MARC doesn't have friends. MARC doesn't play well with others. We literally just came off of him being a part of the West Coast Avengers and leaving because he doesn't team well! 

And here these two are, meeting for the first time and being BFF. 

In fact, the fact that they already know who one another is despite never meeting means that they have heard others talk about them. And when people talk about the Punisher or Moon Knight, they generally don't have good things to say! 

So these two heard "Yeah he's a brutal lunatic" they went "I gotta meet this chap." 

I can't stress enough how amazing this is. 

Frank is even asking Moon Knight to show how he'd take down a guy. He wants to see how Moon Knight works. And Moon Knight is letting Frank go first. 

THIS in itself is amazing. Why? Because we have two highly skilled specialists from a high combat militarized zone that were both known for ambush settings and traps. 

They know everything about this building isn't reading right, they have seen some guards and they don't know what's going on inside. So they are essentially walking into an unknown through a closed space doorway into a stairwell with numerous blind spots and possibilities for traps/ambushes. 

If it were anyone else, Marc would go first to clear the way and possibly take that first hit because he knows he can take it. 

BUT. If you REALLY look at it, Frank is older than Marc. Frank went to 'Nam. Frank has been at this longer and has turned New York into his own personal jungle. 

He offers Frank the lead out of respect AND because he knows and Frank knows that if anything is out of the ordinary, Frank will spot it FIRST and deal with it. 

This is grade A military tactics and my lord it’s beautiful. 

And you know what? 

Frank’s history is that he was team leader. And when Marc gives him lead, Frank takes it and Marc RESPECTS him. They are both used to working in this sort of setting. 

And when you think about it, Marc was NEVER the leader. He followed other people. Bushman was his leader. Marc joined other groups and let other people tell him what to do. If he didn’t like it, he went off and joined a new group. 

So when Frank says “Hold it….!” he is treading Marc like an officer under him and he has now automatically accepted Marc as following him and thus putting him under his protection. This is beautiful. I could wax on about this all day you guys. 

Uh… Back to the comic. So… Frank spots a Black Mamba that’s sluggish from being in a cold setting. 

Marc makes light chatter (he’s kinda of a goof and light chatter is what he does.) Frank quiets him. He knows there’s trouble ahead. 

In the next room, we find a junky going through withdrawal and begging the doc to hurry up. 

The 'doctor' injects him with something just as Frank and Marc bust in. 

"Hello, Ralph. I didn't know you had a license to practice medicine... And only last week you were a lousy junkie..." 

"Punisher!" 

"Drop the needle." 

"I don't think so.... SSSST!" 

And the 'Doctor' suddenly has a snake tongue and snake eyes. 

This bodes well. 

Frank opens fire on his target and it hardly phases him. 

"What have we stumbled into? They move slowly but they don't feel any pain." Moon Knight calls out while pummeling one of the snake guys. 

"It's the cold. [....] Reptiles. The colder it gets, the slower they move. You saw Ralph eat a gerbil--Snakes eat gerbils. This place looks like a herpetology lab." 

Very astute Frank. 

They manage to take down all the snake guys and Moon Knight asks if he recognizes any of them. 

Frank recognizes a couple of them as crackheads and various junkies. 

They find Ralph to be a card carrier for S.O.S. 

"Last week he's a junkie with an armful of holes and this week he's front man for a fancy long island cure club." 

"I think we know where to go next. Why don't you come with me in the chopper?" 

"Thanks, I will." 

(WHY ARE THEY SO POLITE TO ONE ANOTHER. IT'S SO OVER THE TOP.) 

So... Frank takes a ride in Marc's chopper. 

"Nice set-up. How do you keep the engines so quiet?" 

"It's a new kind of fiberglass packing." 

And they arrive back at the mansion. 

"Come on in--I've got a war room. We'll do a little digging." 

"This place is a little ostentatious, don't you think?" 

"There are so many private choppers flying in and out of the neighborhood nobody notices mine--Especially at night. The surrounding mansions and trees also cover our entrances and exits from the concealed hangar." 

I don't think that's what he meant by ostentatious, Marc. 

Inside, Frank, Marc, and Frenchie stand around a table with some maps. 

Marc tells Frank about the Borwardt estate he initially tracked snake man to earlier. 

"I ran a check on cult leaders and you'll never guess who was released from a federal prison last month--Viper." 

Frenchie tells Frank who Viper is. 

"She used to head up zat facist group Hydra, zen she went solo. She was busted in connection with the so-called snake riot in washington last year...[....] A mass hallucination where people believed they turned into snakes. I also learned that Viper was recently sprung from prison by a Dr. Tyrone." 

We head on over to SOS where we see a green lady, "Madam Viper". 

She is in a room of snake men who are 'newly converted'. 

They say they are hungry and Viper tells them that they have "a rabbit, five hamsters and a gerbil. We'll have to make another run to the pet store soon." 

She has a bit of a thing for hitting people with a whip and demanding that they all call her 'Madame Viper'. 

She is then informed that the other clinic was hit and that Newton is dead. 

She sends the new snake men out to the yard for guard duty. She's pretty sure SHIELD is out to get her. Which makes sense since she worked for Hydra. 

Unfortunately for her, it's far from shield. 

Overhead, we find the Moon Copter flying by and Moon Knight drops in with his cape and Frank drops in on a glider. 

The guards immediately open fire on them and Frank returns fire. 

FRANK. DO NOT ENCOURAGE HIM. 

….I don’t know if I should count this as a window dive or not. It’s tempting. I’m not going to count it. He decides to abstain from window entrance for once. 

Unfortunately for Frank, he runs in without checking around and Marc isn't there to watch his six. 

Madam Viper jumps him and injects him with a serum. 

Now... Unfortunately for her... Frank has never responded well to drugs of any sort. He's got a history of this not going well for people that try to drug Frank Castle. 

He doesn't go down. 

In fact, it actually makes him go a little berserk. A berserk Frank Castle is NEVER something anyone wants to face. 

He’s doing fine. 

She makes a run for it. 

Elsewhere, Moon Knight is fighting his own snake man army. 

"Lets of gunfire and then it stopped! The time to start worrying about Punisher is when the gunfire stops.

Viper injects one of her larger helpers turning him into a very large and strong snake man. 

Moon Knight faces off with the big snake guy. His usual methods of just 'hit it as hard as I can' doesn't work. They don't feel pain thanks to the drugs. 

He's wearing a heat pack to keep him moving so Moon Knight decides to take this outside and....WINDOW! WE GOT A WINDOW! 

I mean… This one was legit. And he was exiting with a good reason… But I’m still counting it. 

Heat pack removed and out in the cold air, the lizard guy goes down easy. 

Moon Knight goes to find the Punisher now. 

He finds a room full of bodies and Frank in the middle having a lovely hallucination time. 

In the window outside, Marc watches a rocket thing take off with Viper escaping in it to fight another day. 

Marc manages to distract frank with his crescent darts, moving them around and letting the light reflect off of them in a hypnotic way. This lets him get close enough to take away Frank's gun. 

At this point, Frank calms down and the adrenalin that was coursing through his system and probably helping to stave off the toxic affects of the drugs wears off. 

Frank goes into convulsions and Moon Knight moves to get him out of there. Not to mention the cops are starting to show up and they need to leave. 

The cops have never been fans of Punisher (Despite what the right wing wants you to think when they put punisher logos on their giant trucks) and Frank has never liked the cops. Time to leave! 

Marc takes Frank back to his mansion and puts him to bed. 

I kid you not. 

This... This is a thing that happens a lot. He did the same thing to Jack Russel. Just... Take the drugged up guy home and let him sleep it off in his big bed in the mansion. 

Frank has a rough night, hallucinating and putting up a big of a fight but he sleeps it off. 

The next day, he wakes up feeling a bit better. 

And it ends here. Frank heading off to his next mission and Marc casual as hell as he watches his new buddy leave. 

Again I’m going to say it. WHAT. 

You don’t understand just HOW bizarre this issue was. ON BOTH SIDES. Frank was so…NICE… Marc was so amendable! They acted like long lost friends! WHAT WAS WITH THE CONSTANT REFERENCES TO GERBILS?! Why does Marc keep putting drugged up men in his bed? Why was he wearing Steven’s clothes? I have so many questions.

And from this casual weird encounter… An obsession was born. 

ALRIGHT. Let’s talk about why this works. (This is gonna get long. You can stop here if you don't want to hear me ramble and are just here for the comics).

In the Marvel universe (616), we have a lot of veterans of different wars. 

WWII has Captain America, Bucky, and Nick Fury

Vietnam has Frank Castle. 

Wolverine....a lot of wars. All the wars. Every war. 

Apparently Charles Xavier was in the Korean war (I didn't know that) 

Ben Grimm was in the Marines before his space accident (Awww. Another thing for him to bond with Marc over.) 

Then of course you have Carol Danvers who worked for the CIA in the cold war.

Rhodes (War Machine) who was in Afghanistan and Vietnam. 

There are a LOT of veterans of different wars and different time periods (Marvel time is a soup). 

The initial problem was which war. And this is where we are going to once more step onto the Drifting Pieces History soap box. 

We all know the saying “There’s no good war”. But that’s not right. Not according to politics and public opinion. 

To be a veteran of WWII was a noble and good thing. You fought a clear cut enemy, (nothing worse than a Nazi) liberated suppressed people, and most important, you came home a winner. 

What’s that? There was another war? In Korea? Never heard of that one. We totally didn’t go to Korea and fail miserably and we certainly aren’t going to talk about what happened over there. 

Oh look, Vietnam! The first publicly broadcasted war. Not like “The Whole World is Watching”. Oh no, the average citizen is suddenly getting their first look at what happens in war. Oh no, it’s not as nice and pretty as it’s supposed to be. No one talked about the atrocities that were committed by the good guys in WWII! And the Korean War certainly didn’t happen. 

This was the first war where American soldiers came home and were shunned. They were booed. They lost their jobs, lost their homes, and lost their families. Disgraced and forgotten by their country and their people. 

So we have nice shiny Captain America. A literal representation of the good of America and ideal soldier, punching Nazi and saving people in WWII. 

Then we have Frank Castle, a dirty soldier from Vietnam. I’m sure people screamed “Baby killer” at him fresh off the plane. What’s that? Frank served THREE tours in Vietnam?! He was the sole survivor of a huge ambush? He was awarded the Medal of Honor, the Presidential Medal of Freedom, the Navy Cross, Silver and Bronze stars, and four Purple Hearts? That don’t mean shit to the average citizen that only cares about two things: 1. We lost. 2. We shouldn’t have been there in the first place. 

So he comes home, one of the best Marines in the business, and he’s got nothing. 

He gets married to a sweetheart, has two kids (a little girl and boy), and settles in living an ideal life. A quiet life. Too quiet. Frank’s got a little PTSD going on and he was very good at what he did. He didn’t want to leave. He was good over there. He was respected. He was needed. 

But he’s doing the best he can. Until that’s taken away from him in an event he’d seen over and over again in war. Blazing gun fire and his family is gone. 

He gets revenge. But there’s a problem. He isn’t seen as a loving family man that takes down the people that murdered his kids and wife. He’s seen as a violent ex-soldier from Vietnam that’s gone crazy and is shooting up the place. 

They say that for Frank, “the war never ended. It just changed missions.” 

And all these other Heroes that are also veterans? They came from good wars. Captain America spouts speeches of being a Good Soldier at Frank. He doesn’t know what it’s like to question if the bad guy really is the bad guy. 

If Frank hadn’t of been such a family man, he would have made an amazing mercenary. The best there was. 

But then you have Marc Spector. He went to war to escape trauma. He was good. He was VERY good at what he did. And dollars to donuts, he heard about another Marine that was also very good named Francis Castiglione. 

But Marc could only be good so long as it wasn’t obvious that his mental illness was a thing. Even if he lied signing up for the military, when he took the jobs working for SHIELD and the CIA, they HAD to know about his history in the mental hospital. But the second he starts to dissociate in public, he’s kicked out. Can’t have a mentally ill person hanging out around all those weapons, right? I’m sure that’s what they told themselves as they kicked him to the curb. 

Marc could have gone home here. He’d have been a disgraced hero, sitting on the side of the road on a Veteran hat asking for change. But Marc was still running. He didn’t have a childhood sweetheart waiting for him. He had trauma. 

So Marc carries on the mission and he’s GOOD. And he’s a follower. He likes being told what to do. It prevents him from thinking and taking responsibility. If people get hurt, it isn’t his fault. 

Now Frank is very thorough. There’s a chance that the first time he hears about a new Superhero showing up in Manhattan he immediately looks into it. He’s got access to SHIELD info. He finds out who Marc Spector is and he sees another soldier that was let down by his country. Another soldier that was looking to make a wrong right despite how the war went. 

And Marc? Frank’s a hero. He’s tough. He does what needs to be done to keep people safe. Frank’s a leader and he takes care of his soldiers. 

They look at one another and see soldiers struggling to find their place here in the normal life again because they never HAD normal lives to begin with. 

Moon Knight is the only one who can probably understand where Frank is coming from and not judge him. 

Much later on in the comics, when Moon Knight is desperately trying to fit in with the Avengers and be a better hero, we see him come up against Frank again. Frank understands what Moon Knight is trying to do and he asks him if he really thinks it’s going to work. 

And despite how everything else was going in that particular run (a lot. A lot was going), it was a very real moment. Frank saw through him. I’ll get more into it later when we eventually get there. But man… These two together both make me so happy and also break my heart. 

ANYWAY. Uh… Long extended explanation over! I love this issue with my whole everything. 

This writer? This artist? Why couldn’t THEY have been the ones to take over the Marc Spector run? They get it! Look how pretty they make him! Look at all that cape action! 

They even get the dichotomy of Marc in this time. We may not have STEVEN, but did you see the way Marc was dressed in the mansion? How very Steven -esque. Even the way he treats Frank at the end there. 

UGH I could go on about this all day. I’m going to stop here before I write a dissertation. I HAVE FEELINGS ABOUT THIS OKAY.

[terriblesportsimagines]

could i get HCs for maybe mima or hongou asking his fem s/o to marry him? :) nsfw if you'd like but totally up to yoy!

So cute, so awkward. Lol  Sorry this isn’t nsfw… I tried to think of something, but nothing came XD  To make up for it, I give you both~

Mima Souichirou

Has no idea what he’s doing, but knows he’s supposed to plan something.

He’s not great with verbal communication, not even with you, so he writes his thoughts down and does a lot of research on proposals.

Doesn’t want to be cliché or do anything you would find upsetting.  He’s not great with romance, but bless his heart, he tries.

He focuses on the little things, the little details of your relationship and comes up with something that’s more fluffy than exciting.  He’s an outdoorsy type, so he takes you to the tree in the foresty park you went to on your first date.

Unlike that date, however, it was early October and so it was a little chilly.  He would have preferred to do it in the summer, but professional baseball kept far too busy for something like this.

The proposal is simple – after you eat the soup and onigiri he’s brought for the picnic, he let you pour the tea while he pulls the small ring box from his pocket, keeping it hidden in his hand and sleeve until the right moment.

He loves listening to you chatter.  He can converse reasonably well, of course, but sometimes he just wants to listen.  After a few minutes of chatter, he sets his tea down, then takes yours to set aside and grabs your hand.

Is almost comically serious, and any other person would probably think he was about to deliver bad news.  It’s the nerves.  When you just smile at him, he takes a deep breath and lets himself relax enough to soften.

He kisses the back of your hand, like a prince in a story (and let’s face it, he looks like a prince), and while you are looking at him, maneuvers the ring so that the box is open and he’s holding it out for you.  “Will you be my wife?”

Of your answer is yes, and he accepts all your enthusiasm, even if you knock him backwards onto his back and cover him.  It doesn’t matter to him, and he more than welcomes your passionate kisses and words of praise.

Hongou Masamune

To be honest, he probably doesn’t even think about marriage until someone brings it up.  He gets hyperfocused, and it’s generally on his career.  He can be a little insensitive at times, and he definitely takes things for granted.

However, when Renji points out that he’d been in a relationship with for a long time and that you were a saint for putting up with him for so long, he actually stops to listen.  Of course, he doesn’t understand what his best friend is getting at, but at least he knows to ask now.

He gets really still when Renji tells him that normal couples would be long married by now, maybe even with children.  Not that other people matter, but had he ever stopped to think what you wanted?

He hasn’t.

After that, the idea consumes him.  He’s angry at himself that he didn’t think of it, and a little annoyed at you for never mentioning it.  You aren’t shy about telling him what you want (how could you be?  He’d never get it), but he knows too that you don’t like to push him too much, especially when it came to your relationship.

The obsession grows, and he starts to watch you.  Starts to pay attention.  You aren’t obvious at all, much to his further annoyance, but he starts to see little things, small moments of irritation or sadness.  You flinch whenever anyone asks you about marriage and kids.

He’s definitely not ready for brats, but once he actually considers it, he finds that he wants to see you wearing his ring now.  He’s possessive and a little jealous by nature, so everything sort of feeds into that attitude and his classic impatience kicks in.

It’s not even a special moment.  It’s just so typical Masamune that you will laugh later when you retell the story.

You are just standing in the kitchen, scrolling through recipes on your phone, trying to decide what to make for dinner when the front door blows open with a loud bang.  You jump, but it’s not exactly abnormal for Masamune.

Appears in the kitchen doorway and dark, pretty eyes zero in on you.  Pins you against the counter before you even know what’s happening.

“Marry me.” He barks.

He doesn’t believe in wasting time or playing games.  He wants to know something, he demands to know.  Even now, his question was more like a command than anything else.

Don’t bother questioning him about why now, or how he’d come up with the idea.  He won’t tell you.  Maybe later.

If you take too long to answer, you get to see the very, very rare sight of his confidence faltering.  His heavy brow furrows, and fear touches his gaze.  “Marry me…please?”

Please go easy on this man, he did his best.

[arrjaysketch]

Future Plans! (September Update)

COMMISSIONS (UPDATE) I presently have no idea when I’ll open for commissions at this point! I really want to tackle personal projects first. REFERENCE SHEETS Presently, I have seven male characters left to do for this round! The characters are Graphite Doodles my unicorn stallion, Chris the mouse, Evan the rabbit, Kyle my red fox, Gabriel the squirrel, Trevor Dawson my wolf, and Bud Blaze, my MLP earth pony! There will be more coming at some future point; I really want to establish my characters! Having references available has been really helpful! It takes about two weeks to finish these reference sheets. Sometimes I can finish them earlier; I’m hoping to finish these by the end of 2023! TRADES & GIFT ART I’m thinking about doing gift art and trades sometime in 2024! I don’t have a set date in mind; I mostly want to work on some personal projects first and then see how I feel!  EXPRESSION PROJECT Something I’ve been wanting to do for a long time is a better version of the 25 Expression Challenge. I’ve done a few challenges a long time ago, and I know I’ve done one recently-ish with Princess Celestia and Princess Luna. BUT! I haven’t done one when I’ve had this much self-esteem, self-compassion, and self-efficacy! Like, I feel like I could push myself well beyond what I’ve done before! I’m making a 100 Expression Challenge! You all are in for a treat! I might work on this at the same time as Tremmie and Evan series! TREMMIE & EVAN SERIES While I’m working on the 100 Expression Challenge, I want to dive into a passion project I’ve been wanting to start for 15 YEARS. I’m going to have a Tremmie and Evan sex romp series/comic! It’s going to be everything from sweet, silly, to hot and heavy and gooey! I want to give myself a fun challenge, and I think y’all would love it as much as I do! SOFT SHADING I’m also planning on dinking around with soft shading in 2024! I think I could make my art really pop with some quality shading and lighting! POSSIBLY SELLING SOME OLD CHARACTERS AS ADOPTABLES I am thinking of selling some characters as adoptables! There are 13 characters of mine that I'm never going to draw again, and I’m not going to combine them nor redesign them. I was thinking of making a ref sheet for each and selling the characters! The characters are: Callisto the skadger (skunk badger (spoken for), Sheila the Ringtail, Helen the spotted skunk, Heather the hedgevixen, Mindy the otter, Shazzy the felox (feline/fox), Brook the swift fox, Yasmine the red fox, Jessica/Jessie the arctic fox, Ian the whitetail buck, Liam the jackal, Nemo the snow leopard) and Natalia (striped skunk, formerly Natasha, and unrelated to Jim Hardimans’s Natasha),Todd Vickson, the [undecided] fox. I was also thinking I’d probably due ¾ front view and ¼ back view, and 1 fully clothed view, instead of the 5 views I’m doing for my own characters. I’m thinking I’ll do this sometime much later in 2024. FUTURE REFERENCE SHEETS (LATE 2023) I realized that there are also characters I wish to keep! There are 10 characters in addition to the above that I want to do ref sheets for. Some are my wife Mistletoe's characters! She's not involved with the fandom anymore, but we fully support each other's interests! She sees how happy my characters make me and still likes furry and MLP art! (The characters are: Betsy, the arctic wolf (may change her name), Celeste the genet, Holly Graham, the red Scottish vixen, Josh the striped skunk, Marissa the mouse, Miriam the mouse (thinking of a new design!), Mistletoe the snowshoe hare, Rose Bunny the arctic hare, Josh, the striped skunk, and possibly bringing back Tremaine, but as a simple red fox, not a hedgefox). This will probably be late 2024. POSSIBLE ART PACKS: Instead of a printed portfolio (10 images printed on cardstock with a cardstock cover), I was thinking of doing two art packs I’d sell online! Printing, shipping, and storing physical merch is a huge pain, so I figure I’d sell it online! II am thinking of Poking At Vixens 4: Revisiting The Classics and Poking at Vixens 5: Vixens Poke Back! FUTURE CHARACTER SERIES IDEAS! In no particular order with no set date, yet! How Sherri the negaskunk met Kyle the fox Kyle being seduced by Cindy the kitsune Evan and Bridget  Chris and Andrea Bridget and Andrea Chris and Evan A very soft, sweet, and steamy series involving Bud Blaze the stallion being very attentive to Boninie the cow gal! Sherri introducing Kyle to Bridget and Andrea PONIES I still love My Little Pony a whole danged lot! I’m absolutely expecting to draw more ponies from here until the end of time! I’ve been into ponies (1984) way longer than furry fandom (1996); I still love both fandoms a whole lot! I want to do art ranging from general audiences to smutty!  HUMANS Re-uploading my old art on my Tremaine account back in 2018 made me realize how much I missed drawing humans! There are a bunch of artists whose humans really inspire me, and I absolutely want to practice drawing them! Once I feel I’ve got some decent progress made I’ll share some art! LEARNING NEW STUFF And, of course, I’m hoping to keep learning new things all the time! Goodness knows I’ve already learned so much since I started back on this path in May! Self-esteem, self-compassion, and self-efficacy have helped me a great deal in learning to take constructive criticism better, as well as learning to self-criticize with the aim of improving my art! I feel like as long as I make “having fun” a priority, everything else is so much easier! DISCORD SERVER (MAYBE, EVENTUALLY, BUT NOT RIGHT NOW) Definitely not at this time, but it’s something I’ll consider for the future! I’d like to be more active art-wise and grow my community significantly more before I go that route! STREAMING! I am also planning on streaming eventually. My real concern is being able to split my attention between drawing and a chat! I think I’ll start after I’m done with my initial round of character reference sheets! I do want to watch more streams, too, but I still have the same problem! I pretty much ignore the stream to focus on my own art. I feel like this is a thing I’ll need to jump into and play by ear, so to say!

Posted using PostyBirb

[popculturebuffet]

It's Not the Years It's the Mileage: An Indiana Jones Retrospective: Raiders of the Lost Arc (Comission for WeirdKev27)

Hello all you happy people! And welcome to the first part of a grand adventure. I welcome you all to It's Not the Years , It's the Mileage: An Indiana Jones Retrospective. For the next few months i'll be taking a look at all 5 indiana jones films, revisting the first four just in time for the fifth, all courtsey of good ole Weird Kev and yours truly.

This is also going to be an intresting trip as i've watched most of the films a grand total of .. once

This film's the exception, but yeah, i'll be watching these with mostly fresh eyes. While I LIKE this franchise quite a bit, I simply didn't grow up with it the way other young nerds did. Part of it is the times: the late 90's was full of great franchises for kids, and Star Wars and Marvel Films of the time appealed more to my sense of nerdy wonder. Indy isn't bad, but younger me just wasn't intrested in mostly realistic locations and nazi punching.

That's changed though: Since becoming a fan of Scrooge McDuck and TinTin (Though I REALLY need to read all those at some point, I own em all, and the movie is a guaranteed review at some point and honestly feels like a fifth indy movie simply with the protagonist swapped), I really love a good globetrotting adventure story with lots of love to history, big set pieces and likeable heroes with interesting flaws… okay the last one's more Scrooge but while I covered the Seven Cities of Cibola, it's clear in hindsight just how much Stephen and George were inspired by those comics. So i'm curious to revisit a franchise in a genre I now love to see how it holds up , to see if the low points are really as low as people say, the highs are as high, and the creamy middles as creamy and your welcome to join me under the cut as I take it from the top.

Constructing the Arc

Raiders of the Lost Arc was the brainchild of George Lucas, who had the idea in college, being a fan of old adventure serials and deciding to make a b-movie based on that, though it kept getting shelved for certain space things.

It was said certain space things that ended up bringing Lucas and Speilberg together on this. Nervous about bad reviews for Star Wars, lucas decided to spend his vacation with his wife away from it all for his own mental health's sake and invited Senior Speilbergo along. Lucas pitched the project to him and when his first director choice fell through, Lucas asked Stevie to direct, something he gladly did and it's clear the two really jelled as they came up with a lot of great set pieces… but being busy with pre production, other films and stuff they needed someone to glue it all together with an actual plot. That's where Lawrence Kasdan came in. Kasdan had just started his career but if the name isn't familiar he's the man who'd go on to write Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi and co-write the force awakens so with Speilbergs help they hammered out the full plot of the script including a few key set pieces like the bolder scene which as discussed in our prequel look at the seven cities of cibola wa cripped. Raiders is one of those cases where it took a lot of hands but the resulting script was great.

The problem was.. no studio would bite. Knowing what he had Lucas wanted control of both the lisecne and any sequels while the Studio would get no say. Most studios .. had the reaction you'd expect

It wasn't helped by the fact that while Speilberg is known as a creative visionary to this day, his recent oscar noms proof he's still got it, back then… stuidos more saw his last few films had come in over budget and in the case of 1941 performed badly in the box office on top of that. Lucas rightfully stuck by his friend though, and ended up coming up with a compromise for paramount: everything he asked, but in exchange Paramount got exclusive rights for a sequel and any going over budget or production time would result in harsh fines.

So with that the film went ahead and for the lead Lucas wanted.. a complete unknown. Yeah while Ford was always considered, Lucas wanted to avoid being pidgenholded as a director who just used the same actors over and over again. Hence king of all mustaches Tom Selleck was the frontrunner and even had an indy costume built for him.. but this backfired as the intense intrest for him in this role meant the producers of his star making role magnum pi could up their offer and lock him in. They went with ford and the rest was history.. and a lot of dysnetary. Seriously so much dysentary, to the poitn one of the most iconic scenes in cinema exists entirely because Harrison Ford could barely move.

Otherwise the shoot went decent, and with expert modelwork, effects and stunts the film was a GIANT success both critcially and comercially.. something that's nice to see for a change. Usually films i cover on this blog are good.. but have to get their revulation AFTER the fact like A Goofy Movie or Muppets Christmas Carol. But this film was seen for what it was by most, though looking at wikipedia Pauline Kael apparently did not like it and Lucas maturely responded by naming a villian after her in Willow.

So with a singed but ultimately triumphant history out of the way we can talk about the film itself.

The Find of a Lifetime

Raider's story is simple yet excellent: it moves fast, not a moment's wasted and it gets you from set piece to set piece while still letting the characters breathe and really feel alive, and has plenty of neat setup.

Raiders follows Indiana Jones, a down on his luck archeology professor and adventuerer whose latest mission, a raid of a culture's sacred temple in Chile, goes bad with both his guides trying to kill him, him barely escaping a certain boulder and the whole thing being made moot when his oldest ally Rene Belloc shows up with the indigenous people Indy's screwing over to screw them over himself and pit both his enemies against one another, stealing the idol because there's nothing jones possess that he cannot take away.

Indy does have a plan to bounce back though, a dig to find the Arc of the Covenant, the artifact the ten commandments was kept in. I did some digging, which is my fancy way of saying I looked up it's wikipedia entry and found it's specifications were given to Noah by god, made by artisans and naturally something like this was shuffled all around till being lost after the bible. It's the perfect kind of artifact for a big adventure like this. Granted it opens up some thorny religious questions, but given the sequel shows Kali is also real to a degree, it comes off as less "HEY GOD FEARING RELIGIONS YOUR RIGHT AND EVERYONE ELSE IS WRONG" and more as simply a cool historical artifact with a lot of mystique around it to build a story on that a lot of people would know of and those who didn't, the film explains it for you. Seriously the exposition scene where Indy explains the arc to some government agents sent to talk to him is incredibly well done, showing off both his sheer excitement for this find, and contrasting Indy's usually gruff demeanor in the film with some wide eyed dorky wonder, and you can tell Lucas' own love of archelogy is peaking through it.

Said goverment agents are here because naturally this being the 30's, Hitler is after any mystic artifact he can get his genocidal racist bastard mits on, and have gone after Abner Ravenwood, Indy's mentor who he had a falling out with after he slept with Ravenwood's at the time teenage daughter Marion.

Naturally Indy is forced to rely on Marion who while pissed at him, figures she's safer on his side than without him, especially when said Nazi's show up and try to torture her for info, lead by the truly chilling Major Arnold Toht end up burning down her bar. The two make their way to Cairo and team up with Indy's good Egyptian pal Sallah, played by the wonderful Jonathan Rhys Davis. He really SHOUDLN'T havfe as while Rhys Davies is great.. he's also you know.. white and the film has a very bad penchant for brown face that has aged like wet cheese left in a sunbaked canoe for 87 years. The two deal with the Nazi's at every turn and Marion apparently dies, leaving Indy despondant.. and if that wasn't enough finding out Belloq is naturally working for them, with Indy only surviving thankst o a cloud of children

Thankfully Sallah encourages him and while the Nazi's are digging thanks to a copy built from the original being burned into Tohts hand, it turns out their digging in the wrong place, allowing Indy and Sallah to sneak in.. and Indy to abandon marion when he finds her, not out of malice but because he reallyc an't free her without blowing his cover and endgangering her both which she takes well

He ends up in the well of Souls which is full of snakes, it had to be snakes, and finds the arc.. btu the Nazi's flank him,s teal it and throw marion down. Thankfully INdy and Marion are both able to escape and rekindle things while on a boat. Unforutnately marion ends up kidnapped and while Indy is able to follow them to the island Belloq is going to demonstrate the arc on, his threat to blow up the fucking thing.. end sup ringing hollow as Belloq succesfully plays on Indy's love of history: even with Marion at stake and him fully WANTING to destroy the thing if it means sh'es okay.. he just can't.

Thankfully for our heroes while they end up tied up , Belloq DOSEN'T kill them himself and Indy is smart enough to tell her DON'T LOOK MARION DON'T LOOK, saving them both as we get one hell of a climax with great ghost effect sfor the time, some truly haunting music.. and of course Belloq and the nazi's melting, barring Toht who just.. fucking explodes!

So our heroes bring the arc back.. but sadly for Indy the Goverment is being a bit cautious about God's faviorite doomsday weapon and have it examined by "top men"… aka shuttled off to a warehouse. but while bummed Marion gets Indy to cheer up and while he lost the treasure really, he still also lost a rival, got the girl, and got his spirit back.

Setting the Pieces

As you can tell the plot of Raiders is decent and well set up.. but what really makes it fantastic.. is the presentation. The opening alone is so iconic because it just has so many moments crammed into 15 minutes: the fade in from the paramount logo to an actual m ountain, the slow build up to indy, him easily deflecting an attempt to shoot him in the back with his trademark whip, the MOTHERFUCKING GIANT AMOUNT OF SPIDERS ON ALFRED MOLINAS BACK GOD DAMN WHY, Indy compensating for the idols' weight slowly and carefully and of coures the finale as Indy runs for his life from a boulder, has to "throw him the idol and i'll throw you the whip". All just great adventure stuff. This one set piece alone really sets the tone, who indy is , gruff and graverobbery but still smart, charasmatic and resourceful, without much dialogue. There's a reason just about every part of this scene has been homaged to hell and back.

And it's not the only one: there's a LOT of great set pieces, with Kasdan REALLY having done his job well: there's a nice flow of big set piece, some smaller moments to break it up , and then another set piece without it ever felling like that. I only see it because i know the behind the scenes stuff and while you coudl spot it it dosen't really hurt the film: you get plenty of nice slow character stuff and nice slow methodical archelogly mystery solving. It's just the right pace for an adventure story: plenty of mystery, character development and brain work from our heroes, but also plenty of big flash adventure stuff to keep you invested and on the edge of your seat, as you dont know WHEN the next set piece will happen. One Minute Indy is simply tensely talking to an ex, the next Nazi's attack her and her bar is soon ablaze. A simple plane right segues into the two having to dart around the streets of Cairo through tons of nazi's following them, and into a tense jeep chase and one hell of a hangar battle. There's always something fucking awesome just waiting around the corner with the smaller moments being just as good: the "bad dates", marion's drinking contest where Belloq out manuvers her, the scene on the boat which while romantic also shows the sheer damage Indy's taken in this line of work. It's a really beautifulyl paced film Directing wise.. I mean it's one of the most iconic films out there from a director who has gotten TEN best picture nods all for films that were dearly loved and also Lincoln. It's no shock it's good but there's really a sense of grandeure, backed up by John Williams iconic score. Every shot feels delberate, every set piece epic, every moment useful and the result is a film you just can't hep but enjoy. Even if you know all the steps, as I did as I saw a stunt show for this film as a kid so a lot of the set pieces stuck in my head, you can't help but groove to the rythym of the film. But while the directing, writing and pacing is good there's one last piece that really brigns it all together.. the characters. And of course before we get to the others.. we have to start with our star of the show

Indiana Jones: How You Write an Anti-Hero

So during my little Seven Cities of Cibola prologue for this retrospective, I noted how the treasure hunting aspect of these stories hasn't exactly aged the best: going into ancient ruins to pilfer a culture's history makes "it belongs in a museum" less the big heroic statement it once was as said museum is likely an American one far from where this should be displayed, if at all. So going into these movies I was both curious and worried just HOW indy would come off. It dosen't help the iconic opening when you get down to it and strip away all the cool shit… is two white idiots fighting over an idol that really belongs to neither. And as it turns out that was always the point. While Indy was made to be a LIKEABLE character, he was never supposed to be uber sympathetic: when you get down to the core of it Indy is a throughly interesting hero and one of the best examples of an anti hero i've seen in fiction

Making a protaganist whose an anti hero, or unsympathetic in general is .. tricky. You have to make them charming enough you actually like spending time with them, but still enough of a bastard you don't forget their not exactly a great person. When it goes wrong.. you get stuff like this

When it goes right.. you get Indiana Motherfucking Jones. From the getgo we see Indy is badass: he easily deflects an assasination attempt, dodges the traps through his smarts and experince, and even tries to trick the weight trap for the idol. He's a super cool dude.. but the second he leaves the temple.. we see the mask slip and see the human underneath. He put in all the hard work.. but not only was it for something he really shoudln't be doing, it was all for nothing. We see him run, panickly asking for Jock to START THE PLANE nd finally see him scared of a snake. What makes Indy work is the same thing that made Scrooge work for a young George and Stevie as kids: He's a total badass and fun to watch.. but he's also a throughly flawed man with sketchy morals, and his humanity is what makes him intresting.

When we see Indy at college… it's not going great. It's made clear from his sell of what he could ge tfrom the temple that this adventure wasn't some grand endeavour but simply keeping the lights on, and his class is just filled with people who want to bang harrison ford. Which.. I mean I get. This is prime harrison ford. But it's not what he got a degree for.

That said can we just.. take a moment for the whole class scene? While I like how it shows Indy's intellectual and dorky sides… has anyone else ever noticed how.. weird this is? I mean for starters even for the early 80's the joke of "OH ALL THE WOMEN SIGNED UP BECAUSE THEY THINK INDY'S SEXY' is really dated and corny and while I get Indy is aping old pulp adventure serials did you really have to leave in the dated sexisim George? Did you? Or Stephen? Also the writing stuff on the eyelids… it just comes off like a VERY dated archie comics gag from the 30's and not a scene about the 30's from the 80's and i'ts weird and I hate it.

But the larger point is that we see the good again when the Feds arrive and Indy lights up about the arc: the idol may of just been to pay the bills.. but the ark is something he TRULY cares about, and WANTS to find, to share with the world. Sure he dosen't belivie in it's power.. but he belives in it's value. it's what makes him not shooting it later work: he's a guy who will bring a pistol to a swordfight.. but he's also someone who just can't destroy history even if it'd save his own life and the life of someone he loves. Indy may be gruff, not at all worried abotu doing a murder and a graverobber.. but he DOES care about history and wants to save it from those who'd abuse it. It's what makes him better than Belloq: both sank to the same low but for Indy, doing so is just a stop over and something he had to do for a second. For Rene tha'ts who he is: selling these things just to make a buck he dosen't need. We'll get more into him in a moment, but having that evil window into what Indy could be magnifies the good of what he is.

That said he's still a man with faults and we see those most with Marion: he's sexist at times, dismissive and most grossly brushes off her trauma. Yeah something that gets glossed over and that I didn't notice till this run thougH: Indy dated Marion at 16 when he was 20 at the least. And it's clear Speiblerg WASN'T defending indy either: while Karen Allen came up with the backstory for Marion, Speilberg put it in the film and could've cut the line "I was only a child" if he wanted to. He abused her trust, left her, and genuinely hurt her and while it's clear INdy genuinely cares for her, as we see over the film, it's also clear he wasn't sorry at least at first. I do interpet his "you knew what you were doing" as les shim being a TOTAL prick who undervalues her trauma.. and more him seeing so much of her capablities he forgets the age diffrence and the deep trust meant him hurting her emotoinally cut way deeper than he likely thinks. Just because she can take care of herself… dosen't mean she can't be hurt.

It's what makes the romance over the film work as character development: we don't see Indy soften entirely.. but ove rthe trip we see him open up: while he's still snarky with marion he goes form being openly hostile and entitled to her father's research, to seeing her as a MOSTLY equal partner. While the two end up teaming up because her bar got burend down, it's clear during the Cairo chase he sees her as an equal and even with her getting captured a lot he values her.. and when he thinks she died he's utterly broken. To him the adventure wasn't worth her life and nothing's worth living for. He ONLY goes on because Sallah encourages him to. To me his "you knew what you were doing" and other dismissive crap are the macho front he puts up. It's not OKAY mind you, but it's clear Indy puts up walls because he assumes that's how he's supposed to act and because it's hard for him to actually open up to other people. What I know of his later backstory helps support that: he was in the first world war at a young age, had a dad who wasn't exactly the most supportive or helpful and his mom, the one parent he liked, is gone at this point. Othe rthan Brody at the museum an da few contacts Indy really is alone and it's likely how he wants it. He could've apologized to Marion or her father way sooner, but it's just easier for his life to go on alone, take a few artifacts and move on. It's why later hwne Marion is in danger rather than sneak her out he leaves her kidnapped where she's ostensibly safer. He's afraid of actually getting close to her. It's pragmatic sure it also keeps it.. but in reality he's just scared of someone who can actually keep up with hima nd what that might mean. It's not a huge shock that by the next film Marion is gone and the two don't reconnect till indy is a good few decades older and can realize what he's lost. It's telling that when the two are alone his reaction to al lthe damage he's taken is a quip and yet the two only start really romantically connecting when he drops the front, is honest with her and the two hav ea sweet moment. It's sad it again takes a while for them to go anywehre, but the romance shows his human side.

Indy.. is a flawed man.. but he's ultimately a good one: he priortizes Marion over the artifacts and probably woudl've shot the arc had Belloq not appealed to his hisotrian nature and even when captured makes sure she lives. Indy is a man who simply dosen't WANT to care.. but despite himself will. It's also telling for his weakness he really.. dosen't get much out of htis. He gets marion back but he fucks that up. He gets the arc but the goverment hides it. And while it is a bummer for him he dosen't ge tot study it, and as much as I hate goverment coverups their not exactly wrong humanity, and especially other parts of the goverment probably woudln't handle the arc with care and tha tmaybe something tha tmurders on opening is best left in a box. But he keeps going because i'ts who he is. Like his inspriation.. ther'es always another rainbow and by the end while things aren't great for him he has what matters back: his love of the craft. It never truly left but it's telling after this as far as I can tell none of his future adventures are about treasure pilfering. Each of the sequels is about something important. He apparently takes osme work from a mobster next time, but it's clear he likely took it simply to get the remains and study them instead of actually hand em over to the guy. Indy may not leave this film 100%.. but he leaves it with the spirit of adventure and sense of purpose he was missin gat the start. I look forward to seeing where he goes and what he becomes.

How You Use It

Looking at the cast for Raiders while it has a large cast on paper from tratorious guides, to helpful and charasmatic ship captains, to children clouds, to giant dig sites , to lots and lots and LOTS of nazis', to men who get shot real easy and so on, the film's character focus is really on four people, with Sallah being a loose fifth. It's not uncommon for the genre: most scrooge stories generally have the freudian trio of him, donald and the triplets, Tintin mostly just him, Haddock, Calclus and the Thompsons off in the side doing something wacky, it's best to just focus on a few characters and let the story and set pieces and grandeaur of the adventure flow. So to cap off this look at the film let's explore the non indy cast and how they also are incredibly well detailed and thought out

Starting off we have Marion Ravenwood whose just spectacular. Karen Allen does a fantastic job, portraying her as giving no fucks, drinking men under the table and fairly compitent. The last part would normally be entirely hobbled by the fact she gets kidnapped or put in deadly danger with no way out a booker t amount of times and said cheap use of her for a constant hostage gets tiresome. It's easily the film's biggest weakness.. but it speaks to both Allens performance and the quality of the writing that even cliche sexist garbage like that.. dosen't undermine marion. She tries to escape as much as she can, contributes well to the quest with the head piece when she is around, and DOES try to outwit belloq with a drinking contest… and ONLY fails at that because of something she coudln't possibly know, i.e. that his family owned a winery. At the end of the day Marion simply dosen't badass her way out because sh'e's a normal non combatant: she's able to easily take bar bullies and what not, but she's up against throngs of soldiers, an experinced manipulative treasure hutner, and a relentless nigh inhuman nazi. She can only do so much. It's still not.. perfect. Marion should have more agency and more ot do and like I said using her as a hostage is just super lazy, but it speaks to the character that despite the film sexistly working against her she ends up awesome anyway and i'ts a suprise she didn't come back SOONER.

We then have Belloq who might be my faviorite character in the film. Belloq is neatly composed to be everything Indy isn't: Indy comes from a working class background as we find out later, works a day job, genuinely cares about preserving things and his default mode is "gruff dick". Belloq in contrast comes from money, always wears fancy classy clothes, and while good at being an arcy, does it mostly for the money. Belloq is as I said who Indy could be if he lost his soul: a monsterous treasure hunter who will gladly work with the Nazis if it means a nice payday.

What makes him work is that he's just.. damn chaarming> He's a total bastard, that was never in question, but he just has a smooth air about him: from his first line he's charming and he always feels like he has control of the situation. Really the entire film he's playing just about everybody: He outflanks indy at the start, NEARLY kills him in Cairo and is only thwarted by the children cloud, succesfuly keeps his nazi bosses off his back, and nicely plays marion for info, not only using her undestimation of her to his advantage. IT's easy to see why originally there was a love triangle between her indy and belloq: he's a monster.. but he's just so effortlessly smart and charming he's fun to watch. He's a great villian and Paul Freeman deserves more credit. He also contrasts Indy in that he's not really a fighter: indy gets in there with his whip and gun while Belloq simply throws minons at him.

What weakens him though.. is his own ego: if you look at every encounter with indy and his tent talk with marion you notice that Belloq could've gotten rid of both sooner.. but just dosen't. With Marion he WANTS to woo her, only throwing her in the well of souls because he has to, and is fine dicking around with flirting with her. With indy though it's clear it's more just ego.. hec an't just KILL his arch enemy no no, he has to make a meal of it: he has to both humilate him and have him WATCH Belloq win. It shows in the first scene. He could've just shot indy the second he had the idol.. but just HAS to have indy chased by the tribe to die ironically. He just has to throw marion in the well of souls to twist the knife on his being trapped, just has to brag in the cafe long enough for the child cloud to come in. And of course.. he just HAS to show off that HE found the arc and open it first. While he has a pragmatic reason, he's absoltuely right hitler woudln't be happy if nothing was inside, the real reason is he just has to satisfy his own ego.

Finally we have Toht the film's othe rmain villian. Toht is pretty one note: he's evil, pure and relentless and i'ts very noticable next to belloq. He's also not subtle going into creepy laughs and being very fond of a good strangling. What makes him work is simple: Toht is nazisim in it's purest most creepy form: an unrelnting force tha tcan loose pieces, can stumbled, but is very dangerous if not stopped. Toht has set backs but it's that drive to dominate, to subjigate people he's deemed "lesser", to keep going tha tmakes him scary and it's what makes facisim itself scary: you can stop itk you can kill it's leaders.. but it just keeps coming back and creeping in again and again. You simply can't stop some people's need for power. It also makes the arc that impactful as someone who indy and co barely held off.. dies by fucking exploding. An unstoppable force an da genius creep.. are simply no match against the power of a god.

Wrapup

So that was Raiders of the Lost Arc and it IS everything it's hype to be. It has some dated bits, some shit that was acceptable at the time others that really never should've been, but it's ultimately a well done globetrotter with intresting laired characters, iconic set pieces, and a killer soundtrack. If you've never seen it. i'm shocked your here but go.. go do that. It's well worth it.

Next Time: We visit a less.. shall we say universally loved intry as an oscar winner becomes a mildly racist kid sidekick, Speilberg's wife screams a lot and a man's heart is ripped out of his chest baby! See you next month for temple of doom and thanks for reading.

[rosegoldandsequins]

@akiiyamashun​  //   SENT :

It wasn't often that Akiyama woke up before Okamura - usually his wife had a morning routine which started much earlier than anyone gave her credit for, although the moneylender assured the heiress constantly that she was never anything short of beautiful to him. But even the blonde could see that something was amiss with the loan shark given his very weird look (almost to the point of looking comical on him). Okamura didn't have to ask - when the man realized his wife was up, he rolled closer to her over the bed, folding arms under his body and using them as support for his half-naked torso; the golden phoenix pendant swung free as he did so, but the darkness of the room barely allowed for much light to be reflected by the jewelry. Akiyama placed his chin over Okamura's stomach, getting a very nice view of his wife from down there - but for once, he was entirely undistracted by her chest. "I had a very weird dream," he explained, and smiled as if conscious that what he was about to share would probably sound just as strange to his wife, but anticipating a certain comedic element in her reactions as well, "I was a... Dragon. Like a fantasy dragon, with tail, scales, wings, everything. I really liked gold," he said, and raised an eyebrow as if begging his wife not to interrupt because he wasn't done. "And then I met you - I mean, it was a princess, but it looked like you. And I fell so utterly in love with princess-you that I staged an entire fire at the castle to hide the fact I took you away so we could be happy. The last thing I remember was your hair - and that it was prettier than any gold dragon-me could find," at that moment, Akiyama's left hand extended from under his body to reach for Okamura, brushing a stray strand of hair away as if to emphasize his point to the woman in bed with him. "I have to ask, my star: if you were the princess, would you have ran away with the big, bad dragon? I mean, I set fire the the castle - I think I was a bad one."

❛ ❤ ⋯      

Okamura stirred under the covers, stretching leisurely. A yawn broke through her lips. She fumbled around for her phone ( carefully protected by a custom case made of rose gold sequins in a hard shell ) and glanced at the time. It was early  ―  before she normally got up. Okamura would have gone back to sleep if her husband hadn’t moved beside her.

The heiress’ lips tugged up into a smile as Akiyama situated himself on her middle. Her eyes slowly adjusted to the dark interior of their bedroom. Quietly, Okamura slipped her fingers into the loan shark’s hair and began to play with the shaggy locks. She considered teasing him about the placement of his head ( given their antics last night prior to falling asleep, Okamura’s body was completely bare ). However, Akiyama spoke first.

Okamura murmured soothingly while the moneylender described his dream for her. A carefully - plucked eyebrow ascended toward her hairline, but the heiress didn’t comment until it seemed her lover was entirely finished. Then, she giggled. 

“A dragon?” the heiress echoed. She cleared her throat to get rid of the raspy quality that had settled over her voice during sleep. Okamura’s free hand fell onto Akiyama’s arm. Pink nails stroked his skin slowly. “I think you have been watching too many episodes with Emma, ichigo ; our precious setoka’s fascination with that one is getting to you.”

“Game of Thrones?” Akiyama asked, chuckling. Emma was on her third watch of the series and had requested her father join her. There was something about the piece of media that the girl just loved ( even if it was dated by now ), and she always tried to bring her beloved father into what she liked. 

“That’s it,” Okamura said. The heiress’ smile deepened. “  ―  but, yes, I would be happy to have you kidnap me if you were a dragon.”

Akiyama laughed softly. “You barely thought about it, ma étoile.”

“I don’t need to think more,” Okamura countered, shifting a finger over to tap his nose. “If the beast is indeed you, then I have nothing to fear. You do not have an evil bone in you, ichigo  .    .    .  no matter what world or what you, I know you would never hurt me. Besides, you said yourself that you stole me to keep us together. It sounds like princess - me would be thanking you profusely.” 

The heiress’s palm moved down, cupped the loan shark’s chin, and lifted his head. She stared at him for a moment, thumb pressed just beneath his lower lip. What a handsome face. Okamura could stare at it for the rest of her days, hopelessly lost in the laugh lines and little wrinkles under his eyes that she adored. Scales, horns, wings  .    .    .  those additions wouldn’t make a difference for the heiress. As long as it was still him.

“We’re very lucky ladies, ichigo,” Okamura whispered. “That we both get to have any type of you.”

[emoguyventsaboutnothing]

You know your mental health is on a decline again when you think back to a time you were in a cult and was brainwashed by someone into believing a famous musician was your parent and you see a screenshot of a picture from inside said musician's childhood home and think...what if...? I swear I have been there before!

No you haven't. I haven't. I am just making up fake memories again. This only happens when things feel hopeless in the world. I mean...the cult leader promised we were saving the world. In esoteric ways that I prefer not to go into detail about...

Like my wife said earlier today, "Life is a big bag of dicks". But compassion fatigue is setting in.

The escapist fantasy of your parent being a world famous rockstar seemed like fun at first, until it came to all the times the cult leader had to make the parent out to be abusive and neglectful to keep cover up and make excuses as to why said parent could never come visit or make at least a phone call or video call. At least my ACTUAL dad is coming to visit me for my birthday next month. Maybe I just need that time with my dad again. Why the actual fuck am I making vent posts about this when I am pushing 30?

Maybe because my wife is going through a phase where she is dressing exactly like this said musician, listening to the same bands said musician loves, reading all the comics said musician loves and even wrote, wearing the same makeup as said musician...even got the same belt buckle. It brings me back to those five years I spent wasting time in a delusional state...in a cult...where I was physically, verbally and emotionally abused...nearly killed...many times...

I want to love that band again so bad.

The Ben Nye and Gash, the daggers and bats...

I wish I could have my late teens/early 20s back.

[kudosmyhero]

Crisis on Infinite Earths (vol. 1) #1: The Summoning

Read Date: May 16, 2023 Cover Date: April 1985 ● Writer: Marv Wolfman ◦ Robert Greenberger ◦ Len Wein ● Penciler: George Pérez ● Inker: Dick Giordano ● Colorist: Anthony Tollin ● Letterer: John Costanza ● Editor: Marv Wolfman ●

**HERE BE SPOILERS: Skip ahead to the fan art/podcast to avoid spoilers

Reactions As I Read: ● ok, let’s see what this “Crisis on Infinite Earths” thing is that I’ve heard about for so long ● my very first time coming across Green Lantern in comics. or “Power Ring,” I should say. and “Ultraman” as Superman. so I still haven’t come across Green Lantern ● I dig Pariah’s lavender hair, btw ● that was a long cold open, but it did a good job of setting up the situation without reeeeally letting me know wtf is going on ● Gorilla tea time

● Harbinger reminds me a bit of Circuit Breaker in her stance and clothing ● so much happening ● I’m not really a fan of the big, sweeping storylines that involve multiverses, space aliens, etc. I’m much more into street-level stories. I’ll try not to let my bias color my view too much on this tale, but no promises! ● it doesn’t help that this issue is so long though! 31 pages and counting ● ah, good. stopped at 32 ● 👏👏👏

Synopsis: At the beginning of time, the Big Bang occurred, forming the universe. However, where there should have been one universe, there were many, each one a replication of the first, with their own separate histories. For in that instant a multiverse of worlds was born.

At the present time, a great white wall of pure anti-matter energy stretches out across the cosmos. It pervades the Multiverse, consuming entire galaxies. On an unknown parallel world, a being named Pariah arrives. He is forced to witness the death of multiple worlds in multiple dimensions. He disappears as he is transported to the parallel world known as Earth-Three. On that world, the Crime Syndicate, in a rare demonstration of heroism, strives to save their beleaguered planet. However, even their combined might cannot prevent their deaths at the anti-matter wall.

The planet's sole hero, Lex Luthor, retreats to his home where his wife, Lois, holds their infant son, Alexander, in her hands. Luthor places Alexander into an experimental rocket capsule and launches him from the planet Earth. As Earth-Three dies, Alexander's capsule pierces the vibrational wall separating dimensions. It lands on the abandoned Justice League Satellite orbiting Earth-One.

On board another satellite, a being called the Monitor summons his assistant Harbinger. He instructs her to travel to various alternate Earths and bring together a select group of super-powered beings. Harbinger uses her power to create replicant versions of herself and sends them to the various Earths. The Monitor meanwhile, prepares to gather Alexander Luthor's space capsule.

The first of Harbinger's replicants travels to Earth-One and gathers King Solivar from Gorilla City. Another travels to Earth of the 30th century and summons Dawnstar of the Legion of Super-Heroes to her cause. A third replicant journeys to Earth-Two of the year 1942 to enlist the aid of Firebrand. One version gathers the Blue Beetle from Chicago. Another version of Harbinger collects the Psycho-Pirate from Earth-Two's present timeline. She brings him to Earth-One where they encounter Firestorm and Killer Frost. The Psycho-Pirate uses his Medusa Mask to make Killer Frost fall in love with Firestorm. Another replicant travels to Pre-Cataclysmic Atlantis to find Arion the Sorcerer. However, a Demon-Shadow attacks her and takes possession of Harbinger. The possessed replicant finds Arion and brings him back to the Monitor's satellite.

When they arrive, they find a room full of heroes and villains from alternate realities. Before the assemblage has a chance to acclimate itself to their foreign environment, a horde of Demon-Shadows attacks them. They fight them off until the Monitor arrives. He casts a brilliant burst of light, which dispels the shadows. Introducing himself, he tells the impatient gathering that he had summoned them because their universes may soon be destroyed.

(https://dc.fandom.com/wiki/Crisis_on_Infinite_Earths_Vol_1_1)

Fan Art: Harbinger (Earth-27) commission by phil-cho

Accompanying Podcast: ● Superman in Crisis - episode 01

[erodasfishtacos]

request for ceoverse! pls make where the wifey visits him at work ((wherein the employees still dont know how she looks like)) and his secretary kinda looks down at her like “who r u, do u even have an appointment lol” ... i want angry ceo!harry and shook employees PLEASE +++ hes all soft w her in front of them and they are all like HUH 🤨

TEMP OPENING (mini blurb)

Reminder: Harry is not nice! He’s an asshole to everyone but his wife and baby.

-

Y/N was a bit frazzled. She was suppose to drop off important documents, that her husband had forgotten at home, to Harry’s office an hour and a half ago.

Ivy decided that it’d be best to throw a temper tantrum because she didn’t want to stop playing with her toy kitchen set.

After a half hour of wriggly, angry toddler chaos - Ivy was strapped into her car seat with a furious expression.

Especially because YN didn’t let her bring a toy along because of her behavior. It was her attempting to kick the back of the leather seat until YN firmly asked her to stop.

When she wouldn’t, YN pulled out her last resort card. She didn’t use it much because she didn’t want it to lose luster.

“Did I need to tell Daddy how you’re treating mummy?” YN looks in the rearview mirror at her red-faced daughter.

Ivy looked comical. She’d refused to let her mother comb her wild curls or change her white shirt that was covered in berry stains.

“No!” She shrieks but stops kicking and huffs as she looks out the window to the passing scenery.

The temper of her father, YN swears.

-

She manages to scurry through the building without many glances. A few people know who she is but not any of the lower level employees.

They don’t recognize Ivy either because she is rarely in the building and if she happens to be they keep her on the secluded top floor where his office is.

YN is rushing, feeing awful about not getting the papers to him sooner. She doesn’t look much better than her baby.

Hair is a messy bun atop her head, a ripped up vintage shirt, and grey biker shorts that have similar berry stains to her daughters.

She is basically dragging her toddler along as she isn’t very willing to use her feet at this very moment. Stopping and staring at everything then grumbling when her mum pulls her away.

Finally she arrives at the office that houses his secretary before the massive doors that lead into his office.

When she pushes through, there are two men sitting on the sofa with briefcases in their laps - obviously waiting for a meeting.

The women behind the desk isn’t the usual grey haired grandmother-like women that she and Ivy love.

Harry’s normal secretary was on a week vacation and there was a younger, raven-haired girl sitting in her usual position.

She looks YN up and down with judgemental eyes before she smirks and says, “Mr. Styles isn’t hiring for the cleaning crew right now.”

It takes moment of confusion to realize that the girl is implying that how she looks - unprofessional and a hot mess means she’s less than.

Even though any job is a good job.

YN is about to comment on how rude the comment is but Ivy bolts to the side of the office to view a large very much alive plant.

She reaches up to curiously pick at the leaves in her child-like wonder but ends up pulling the whole thing over, soil spilling all over the plush white carpeting.

It startled Ivy into tears, rushing back to her mum and begging to be picked up. YN can feel the men and the secretary’s eyes on them.

“Mummy, it’s scary,” Her daughter whines, sniffling and burying her face into her mum’s neck. Hiding.

“You’re okay, it’s fine,” YN soothes, rubbing her back comfortingly.

“It’s really not okay because now I have to clean that up. Maybe you should get that little brat under control.”

It’s perfect timing when Harry’s door opens and he hears the girl call his daughter a brat.

His perfect little baby.

All eyes go to Harry, he demands attention anywhere he goes but this is his territory. He’s fucking furious.

“Hayley, why are you talking to your boss that way?” Harry asks in a calm, taunting tone. He casually rests against the doorframe.

Hayley looks at him confused, “What do you mean? I was just telling this women that her daughter is out of control.”

“First off, that women is your boss just as much as me. Seeing as she has 50% ownership of the company,” He replies cooly, pursing his lips in irritation.

“Second off, I’m not going to tolerate you insulting our daughter. She’s a fuckin’ baby, she’s going to do things kids do,” Harry motions to the plant lying lifelessly on the ground.

YN shoots his a look, no cursing in front of Ivy, and he automatically sends her an apologetic look. Their daughter has popped up and is dimpling at her father.

“Daddy! Missed you!” Ivy chirps happily.

The two men are wide-eyes and quiet, they look at each other once - communicating silently.

“Anything else I need to address, pet?” Harry asks his wife, accepting Ivy when she makes grabby hands at her father.

Harry smiles down at his child, “Hi Vee. Y’missed Daddy? I missed you, my little lovie.”

YN usually would let it alone and not be catty - truly.

Insult her all they want but they do not talk about their daughter like that.

“She said that they’re not hiring janitorial staff. I guess my appearance gave off that kind of signal,” YN smirks, even though the rock on her finger should have given it away.

“Hmm, isn’t that interesting?” Harry hums, mocking that he’s thinking hard.

It’s amazing how he can still be intimidating with a little clone of himself in his arms - who’s currently wrapping her fingers in his cross necklace.

“Wha-what?” The confused, nervous girl answers as she realizes the pit she dug herself into.

“It’s interesting because we may not have a janitorial position available but we have a new opening for a temp secretary,” Harry smiles widely with no empathy for the girl.

Then he’s turning to the other men, “D’you two have anything t’say? I’m always willin’ to open your positions too.”

They shake their heads in unison and don’t open their mouths at all. They actually look at their feet.

“You’re a fucking asshole,” Hayley spits at him, standing up and throwing her purse over her shoulder.

“You better hurry. The unemployment office closes at two,” Her husband tells the girl before ignoring her mutters to kiss his daughter’s cheek.

YN steps over, murmuring “She has been a brat all day but she’s our brat.”

“Eh, her mummy is a brat half the time too,” Harry replies, lowly so the men can’t hear.

He can’t help but reach his hand around and squeeze quickly at her bum.

“H,” YN squeaks, smacking him playfully, “Here’s those papers. I’m sorry I’m so late.”

“Never be sorry, s’okay. These guys have been sitting there for the last two hours waitin’ on them to start the meeting. They’re fine.”

YN flushes, avoiding the men’s gazes, and hands them to her husband, “You really are an awful boss.”

“I know, s’fun,” Harry smiles, pressing a kiss to her lips before kissing Ivy’s nose to hear her giggle.

After meeting, the men will discuss - one: how hot his wife is and two: how Harry was whipped for her and his baby.

Enjoy 😊

[theycallme-thejackal]

Noah and Astrid go to Lenny’s show

Pairing: Lenny Bruce & Midge Maisel Rated T

Part 1 | Part 2

They leave Chaim with his parents for the evening and get in a taxi with Midge.

Astrid seems to relax almost the moment they exit the building, and she's back to being his very cool, very sweet wife, her anxieties fading when she doesn't feel like she needs to impress his parents.

The reality is she doesn't need to. Noah loves her regardless of how his family feels.

He is, however, grateful his little sister likes her. Because Midge has great instincts when it comes to people.

Except Joel. She was pretty blind when it came that schmuck.

They arrive at a club in the Village, and he pulls out his wallet to pay the cover charge, but the guy waves it off, tells them Lenny already took care of it. So they go sit at a table and order drinks while the band sets up.

Lenny greets them, kissing Midge on the cheek and giving Noah and Astrid a wave. He asks if they want drinks, and Noah joins him at the bar to order. "Thanks for paying the cover charge, man. You didn't have to do that."

The comic shrugs as he leans on the bar. "I'm just sucking up. Want you to like me since I plan on shtupping your sister for the next fifty years or so," he jokes.

"Fifty years?" Noah asks with a laugh. "So you - "

"Someday," Lenny replies with a dismissive little wave. "For now, we're just dating, but...someday."

The bartender comes over, and Lenny orders for himself and Midge before gesturing to Noah. "A rye manhattan and a gin and tonic," he says.

"Rye?" Lenny asks with a brow raise. "You like rye?"

"The manhattan's for Astrid," Noah corrects with a smile. "She grew up in Maryland. She likes rye."

Lenny chuckles. "She really is cool," he comments.

---

Lenny's act is great. The band is, too, and Midge brings them outside to meet them. “Guys, this is my brother, Noah, and his wife, Astrid,” she says, and the guys wave.

“They cool?” Noah hears the bass player mutter to Lenny.

“Well he’s a spook, but a cool spook, right Noah?”

Noah chuckles. “Sure, Lenny. I’m a cool spook.”

“Well then,” says Lindsey, offering a joint. “Have a hit.”

He looks at Astrid, who shrugs, letting him know she’s fine with it, and he takes a drag. He holds it in just a little too long and sputters out a cough, making his wife giggle.

Then she takes a hit easily - expertly even - and the whole group stares in silence and a little awe.

Fuck, she’s cool.

Astrid looks around the group. “What?” She asks with wide eyes. “I grew up in the sticks. Pot was just about the only form of entertainment we had,” she explains before taking a second hit. Lenny laughs.

Lenny Bruce just laughed at something Astrid said, and that makes pride swell in Noah’s chest. She passes the joint off to the sax player, and Noah wraps an arm around her shoulders, kissing her hair.

Midge gets up and does the introduction when they go back in, and when she starts going in on Noah, he buries his face in his hands as he laughs.

They head home around eleven, and in the back of the cab, he pulls her close and and kisses her slowly for a long moment. When he pulls back, she looks at him a little dazed. “What was that for?” She asks breathlessly.

Noah shrugs and brushes over her cheek with his thumb. “Cause I love you.”

She smiles and snuggles into his side. “I love you, too.”