#I DO NOT AGREE WITH SUCH ACTIVITIES BY THE WAY

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Your Love Feels Like Forever | Jack Hughes x Fem!Reader

warnings! mentions of fighting, divorce, slight angst. word count: 6.8k

summary: Y/N grew up next to the Hughes Family, sharing their love over the sport of hockey. Jack and Y/N are each others lifelines until distance brings them apart. Despite numerous attempts to see each other, it seems like life drives them apart until an open window to final be together after years apart.

a/n: Hi! This is my first hockey fic and I'm so sorry if it's not any good but I just had this story idea in my head forever and finally decided to write it and post it. I hope you enjoy!

-----

Since she was a little girl, she was full of love, smiles, laughter, and what seemed like an unlimited vocabulary with a side of love towards sports. Growing up in the outskirts of Toronto, she was seen chasing a ball with her hockey stick on the streets in the summer months and gliding across the ice during the winter. On the other hand, if she was not found outside her family home, Y/N was likely to be found lost in the story of her novels or scribbling away in her notebook.

She loved the way that the simple motion of opening a book can be a gateway to an alternate universe, whether it be a fantasy world with magic and fairies or diving into a beautiful story of romance. Y/N cherished the ways authors used words to comprise an empire of imagination - motivating her to hopefully be able to do the same one day.

Currently, little 10-year old Y/N was out in the harsh Toronto winter with her dad as they skated across the neighbourhood outdoor rink chasing after the small black puck. She was fortunate to have her dad to keep her company with her different hobbies, though sometimes she felt guilty for constantly craving being active.

David, her father, was a single dad after her mom ultimately deciding that this family no longer was fulfilling what she wanted in her life. The early years of Y/N's was rocky with her parents constantly arguing over the different views they had on what a "perfect life" looked like. It's been almost 3 years since her mom packed her things into a few suitcases and slammed the front door shut, never to see her daughter again. Y/N, at that young age, didn't understand the gravity of the situation and what it meant to no longer have her mom in her life. On the contrary, she was lucky to have the Hughes Family that lived next door.

During those nights where David and his (now ex) wife used to raise their voices, determined to prove themselves correct, Y/N would run to the Hughes' home. Ellen and Jim had a fraction of an idea of what was occurring behind the walls of the L/N household, and they were more than happy to provide the young girl with a safe place to stay.

Y/N sat at the top of the staircase, her hands covering her ears as her parents were yelling at each other yet again. She couldn't understand why they couldn't agree on... whatever it was that they were fighting over again. She just wanted to read in peace since it was too dark outside for her to continue playing ball hockey with the other neighbourhood kids.

She huffed in frustration as she finally stood up from her spot and walked back to her baby blue bedroom. She grabbed her under armour backpack, marked with her hockey club's logo and her jersey number #86. Y/N grabbed her novel, her hoodie, and of course her beloved bunny jellycat - quickly shoving it into her bag

She quietly crept down the staircase and towards the front door where she slid on her runners and quickly slipped out of the house. Besides, her parents were clearly not concerned with what their daughter was up to at the moment of a heated argument.

Y/N stood on her front porch, scanning over her front yard which faced the rest of her neighbourhood, trying to determine what her next move would be. Her shoulders slumped, feeling a bit lost in her decision. She pursed her lips, her hands gripping onto the straps of her backpack a bit tighter. Her eyes landed on the white painted home which belonged to the Hughes.

She's never stepped foot inside that home, she only really knew Mrs. Hughes from provided kids with lemonade in the summer and her three sons. Quinn, the eldest who was 9, Luke, the youngest at 5 years old, and then Jack - the middle child who was the same age as her. They were all friends from playing soccer at the park or ball hockey in the warmer months and playing hockey at the ODR in the colder months.

Without much thought, Y/N walked over to the white home and rang the doorbell. In seconds the door opened to reveal Jim, who seemed surprised to see a young girl at his front door.

"Hi Y/N, how can I help you?" He said kindly to the girl. Jim figured that she was likely asking if he wanted to buy Girl Scout cookies or maybe donate to her team. It was a few moments before he realized that she was completely alone, which was unusual.

She shrugged at him, not exactly knowing what to say to the man, "Um, can I read my book here?" Y/N asked him, her hands pulling the straps of her bag closer to the middle of her chest, "My mommy and daddy are fighting, I think... I don't know but they're so loud and I can't focus."

Jim's facial features softened as the words that left the girl's mouth, he was going to respond before,

"Honey? Who is it?" Ellen called out from the dinner table.

"Of course you can come in, Y/N," He told her as he opened the door wider to allow the small girl to step into the warmth of his home, "Have you had dinner yet?"

She quickly shook her head, "No, I've been waiting since I had to stop playing ball hockey because the street lights went on. My parents were yelling, so I was waiting in my room."

Jim watched Y/N as she kicked off her shoes as he closed and locked the door shut. He grabbed the backpack off of her, "Here, I'll take this off of you."

She smiled at him and nodded at him, he motioned her to follow him down the small hallway. At the other end was the dinner table where the rest of the Hughes family sat. Four sets of eyes all looked up at the girl, she froze in her spot - suddenly feeling awkward for intruding their family dinner. Jim placed her bag near the wall, "Y/N is going to join us for dinner, no questions asked, alright boys?" He stated, looking at his sons.

They all nodded before resuming back to their eating. Ellen immediately stood up from her seat at the other end of the table, "Hi sweetheart, come with me! I'll fix you a plate." She told her as she walked into the kitchen, Y/N stood next to Ellen as she made a dinner plate.

"Can I wash my hands before I eat?" Y/N flashing a small smile, Ellen chuckled,

"God, of course you can honey. I wish you could teach my sons the same habits," Ellen commented as she placed the plate at the empty seat next to Jack, "The bathroom is to the right of the front door"

Y/N nodded her head before walking towards where the bathroom was. As soon as the adults heard the door close, Jim spoke quietly to his wife, "She asked if she could read here, she said her parents are fighting and... yelling."

Ellen frowned, "Awh, that's terrible"

"She also said she's been waiting since the streetlights came on to eat dinner and was hiding in her room until the yelling stopped"

A frowned etched onto Ellen's face, but was quickly wiped off as Y/N returned and she sat next to Jack.

"Are you sleeping over?" Jack asked her as she started eating, "We could watch a movie or play a game or something! Actually, it's perfect since we will have even teams!"

"Jacky, she just got here!" Quinn exclaimed at his brother, "Give her a second to settle in."

"Um... I don't know" Y/N answered, "I just want to read my book"

Luke perked up, "Like a bedtime story? Quinny stopped reading those to me a long time ago."

She giggled, "I don't know if you want to hear about wizards and witches before you go to sleep."

Luke only shrugged, "I think they're cool."

Dinner progressed and Y/N quickly melted into the dynamic of the Hughes family. They discussed hockey together, activities they did at school, and whether or not a hot dog is a sandwich.

It was late and the four kids were cuddled up on the large couch, all of them focused on the movie that played on the screen. Ellen's heart melted at the sight of Y/N squeezed between Jack and Luke, and her little Luke's head resting on her shoulder.

"I'll send a text to David to let him know that Y/N is here and is on the brink of falling asleep," Jim mumbled to Ellen as he pulled out his phone, "Plus, I don't want to send that girl back into that house if they don't have their argument resolved." Ellen agreed quickly.

The rooms were then split to Jack and Luke sharing Luke's room, giving Y/N Jack's bed for herself. She crawled into his bed, clutching onto her stuffed animal and read her book with the light of his night lamp on. She sniffled to herself, feeling a bit sad that she was completely alone. The whole house fell silent at the late hour, only she was awake and lost in the story. The door to the bedroom cracked open, catching her attention. She quickly wiped the stray tear away from her cheek as Jack tip toed in, "Hi" He waved shyly.

"Hi Jack," She waved back, "Are you okay?"

He only shrugged, "Lukey keeps hogging the blanket, I was coming to steal my extra to sleep on the couch."

"No way," She scoffed, "You are not sleeping on the couch in your own home."

"Well, I'm not gonna make you sleep on the couch either."

Y/N sat in a moment of thought before she perked up, "Just sleep here! I curl into a small ball when I sleep, I promise I won't hog the blanket either."

Jack grinned at her, "Sounds good!" He climbed onto his bed and tucked himself underneath the blanket, "Whatcha reading?"

"Harry Potter," She told him, "Wizards and witches and stuff"

"Can you read it to me?"

And so she did. The two seven year olds stayed up into the late hours of the night as Y/N read out loud the words of her novel. Jack was quickly immersed into the story, holding onto his blanket as she read to him - voice soft and spoke eloquently. He quickly realized that he could probably listen to her talk forever. They giggled at the funny parts and she explained the details that he missed from earlier. The two quickly fell asleep together. Harry Potter falling off the edge of Jack's bed, and the start of a beautiful friendship blooming.

Their friendship formed into playing street or ice hockey together (always on the same team), sitting together at school so they can giggle between each other, and reading books together when they were feeling more mellow. They cherished each other deeply as they always understand the other. Jack protected her, when he closes his eyes, he often sees the small little girl that awkwardly stood in front of his entire family during dinner that one night. If she was happy, he was happy. The same goes for her. They shared emotions, they understood each other perfectly. They kept each other's deepest secrets, swearing to never tell another soul as they locked pinkys.

"Forever?" She asked him as his pinky wrapped around her.

"Forever." He promised, locking it.

Her father was glad that his daughter content and happy despite the hardships she went through in her childhood. She found solace in the shape of the Hughes brothers. She was good friends with Luke and he always helped her bake when she did. Luke always thoroughly enjoyed when she would read to him since he claims that books are only good when she tells them. He often looked up to her as the big sister he never had.

Quinn always kept an eye on her whenever they would play with the other neighbourhood kids; some of them often claiming that "Girls can't play sports" or "No girls allowed", which he was always quick to shut them down. The two would also discuss different books with each other as they were both big readers.

Y/N and Jack were now entering their teen years, both at the ripe age of fifteen. Hockey both played such a large role in their lives as each of the Hughes brothers and Y/N both played competitively. Y/N would do her best to watch each of their games when she could, and the same goes for them.

The sound of her stick contacting the puck, sending it flying straight into the net. The red light behind the goalie turning on as the horn blares, signalling the end of the game.

Her arms flying up into the air as she scored the final goal of the game and the stands erupted into cheers. She undoes the clasp of her helmet, pulling it off while gliding past the glass where she flashes her infamous bright smile at the sight of the Hughes family standing up in the audience. Ellen was standing with her phone out, clearly taking photos of Y/N's win.

"You were amazing!" Jack exclaimed as she walked out of the change rooms with her large hockey bag dragging behind her, "You were the best on the ice!"

She grinned at her best friend while approaching him, immediately wrapping her arms around his neck when he was within reach. He responded like it was a reflex, his arms around her waist and lifting her slightly off her feet.

"What can I say? I have a good personal coach" She teased, commenting on the fact that Jack was constantly helping her improve.

"Good game kiddo," Quinn told her, his hand ruffling her hair, "None of the other girls stood a chance."

She sighed in contentment, Jack's arm around her shoulders while Jim took her hockey bag off of her hands. Y/N felt so surrounded by love from the family that wasn't her own, the only question being: "Where is my dad?"

They all moved as a unit towards the van, all kids stumbling into the back seats while the adults took the front seats. Jokes were cracked throughout the drive and constant comments about her performance were made.

Jim pulled into the driveway, Y/N swift on her feet to grab her bag, "Thank you guys for coming, it means a lot" She told the family.

Ellen's hand squeezed her shoulder, "Of course, honey. We'll always be supporting you even if it's from a distance."

Her eyebrows furrowed, "...What do you mean by that?"

Ellen and Jim look at each other before turning back to the kids, before sharing the news that will cause a shift into their worlds,

"We're moving sweetheart," Jim broke the news, "We're moving to Michigan."

The air shifts and Y/N feels her stomach drop, "W- What?"

"Wait what?!" The brothers yell out, "When?"

"Since when?"

"Why?"

Questions were shot left, right, and centre from the kids while Y/N stood frozen in place. The Hughes... weren't going to be her neighbours anymore?

"I should go home..." She mumbled, looking down at her feet.

Jim and Ellen ushered their boys into the home while they continued protesting as Y/N slowly dragged her feet back to her own house. She slumped against the closed door, bag dropping to her feet. For the first time in a while, she didn't know what was to come.

-----

The transition was, without a doubt, hard on her. Jack and Y/N sat on the bed of the packed away bedroom, tears falling down her cheeks faster than he could wipe away. They swore that they will remain as each other's best friends, no matter what happens. They promised to text each other every day, and FaceTime when they were able to.

"You'll always be my number one girl, okay?"

"Forever?"

"Forever."

She stood alone on their driveway as she watched their car turn the corner and out of her view, her arms hugging herself. Everything was about to change.

-----

Y/N was now sixteen, her sweet sixteen. Yet she felt so alone. Of course she had other friends at school but nothing filled the hole that was left behind by Jack moving.

She shifted as a person. She quit hockey since money was getting tight for her and her dad. Rather, she delved into the depths of writing - more specifically writing about sports. She quickly became the writer for her high school's newspaper for the sports column. Writing gave her a new sense of freedom, so much more different from how she felt when she used to write little story books for Luke as a kid.

Maybe it was because she was at the peak of her teenage years. Maybe it was because it is the prime time to learn more about yourself. Try new things, maybe it won't hurt. Or maybe it was her urge to find something that will stay. Writing about sports could be her future. Maybe this won't leave her the same way that her ability to play competitive hockey did, or the way Jack moved across the border and left her behind in Toronto.

Regardless, the two stayed close over the past year away from one another. They kept their promise of texting each other daily.

But as it happens, Jack and Y/N drift slightly as their schedules get busier with his heightened hockey practices and her increase in school work. Responses become further apart, their windows to catch up over FaceTime slims. Long distance friendships are anything but easy.

Deep down, although it hurts, she knows that he will always be there for her and plus she is so happy for Jack. During the countless late night conversations, he would tell her how badly he wanted to play in the NHL. It is his dream to play in the major leagues. This was just a step closer to him achieving it.

Y/N continues to write for the school paper but quickly gains attention from parents,

"Hi, I'm so sorry if this is strange," a woman said as she sits next to Y/N, who is observing the Varsity Boys Hockey team belonging to her high school, "But are you by any chance, Y/N L/N?"

Her eyes widened at the question and nods, "Yeah, I am! Can I help you?"

The lady's shoulders relaxed while adjusting in her seat, "I'm Lynda, it is such a pleasure to meet you. I have been reading your sports columns since my daughter has been bringing the school paper home and I can't help but be so impressed with your talent!"

Y/N's face flushed red from the compliment, she wasn't used to attention aside from the typical ones made by Jack.

"Really?" She asked, trying to read Lynda's face to see if there was any sign of lying but none to be found, "Thank you so much, I appreciate that a lot actually."

"I'm only telling you the honest truth," Lynda chuckled, "I write for town newspaper and I wanted to offer you the opportunity to write outside of your school's paper."

"Are you serious?!" Y/N's jaw dropping at her words

"Absolutely! I think it could be a fun learning experience for you whether or not you decide to pursue sports journalism in university or college." Lynda explained to her, "You can write similar to how you do for your current paper but you can branch out to the club teams and even the competitive ones if you want. It probably won't be a large section just because you still are in high school, however, experience is experience nonetheless!"

Y/N immediately took Lynda's offer on the spot. The two exchanged contact information and soon Y/N's world of journalism expanded even more. Weeks past and Y/N found herself excited and eager to get out of bed to go to school, learn, go watch some hockey, and spend her free time writing about it.

It was like a collide of her worlds, athletics and her love for books and writing in one.

She flopped onto her bed, rolling onto her side to keep her phone propped up, "It's been unreal, Jacky"

Jack grinned from the other side of the screen, "That sounds so awesome, smiley, seriously. You're awesome."

Her cheeks turn a light shade of pink as she looks at her best friend on her phone screen, she feels her heart flutter at his words - was it always like this?

"How are you though?" She asked, tugging on her hood of her sweater, "I feel like we haven't talked in forever."

He sighed, "Busy, really busy but it's been a blast. Although, I wish I had you writing weekly news columns for me." Jack joked while she playfully rolled her eyes, "Also, I can't visit you this summer anymore... I know we've been talking about it, but you know, hockey camp and all..."

Y/N feels a small frown tug at her lips, a pang of disappointment punching her gut but she hides it. She shoved down her emotions, appearing unaffected to his news, "That's okay, I get it."

"I'm really sorry, Smiley," He told her, his own disappointment painted across his face, "I haven't seen you in a year."

"I know, but at least we have FaceTime!" She responded, "Plus, this is going to be so good for you! You're going to have such an amazing time!"

The two best friends continue talking about everything and anything for the following hour or so before hanging up. Y/N settled further into her bed before allowing herself to feel the weight of her emotions. No Jack until who knows when, is this the new normal? Just the inability to see each other in person until the one day that they will cross paths again?

-----

Years passed, the two graduating high school and although they weren't able to physically attend each other's ceremonies, at least they were watching over the phone. Luke held up his phone at Jack's graduation, giving Y/N a perfect view of Jack walking across the stage to receive his diploma. Y/N, as always, being his number 1 cheerleader.

Jack moves onto playing for the New Jersey Devils in the NHL, Y/N watching him from her TV in her hotel room at the night before her father's wedding night.

David remarried to Liz, Y/N watching from the view of the bridal party that her father is finally having a marriage that makes him truly happy. Liz was a loving and one of the kindest woman that she's ever met. From the moment Y/N met Liz, she knew that this woman was made for her dad. All she wanted was her dad to be happy for the sake of himself, and not for his daughter. While growing up, her dad gave her everything in attempts to give her somewhat of a normal childhood. It was never an easy task for David to mimic being a mother to his teenage daughter, but he still managed to pull through for Y/N - and she was forever grateful to have him as her father. Although he missed the majority of her hockey games or seeing her before each homecoming, at least he tried to be there for his daughter. She watched the love grow between her dad and his now wife, and after everything her dad had gone through with his divorce and having to raise his daughter alone, she was buzzing with excitement for her dad's start at a new life. He gets to live his life for himself for the first time in so long as Y/N was moving into the big busy city for university. It was bittersweet, but neither one could be happier at the moment.

Y/N continued onward to attending the University of Toronto to study Sports Media and Sports Journalism, finally finding what fulfills her. With Jack being busy with his rookie year, she is able to fully focus on her studies and striving towards her dream. She often finds herself thankful for the opportunity offered by the sweet woman, Lynda and giving her the experience to write in the town's paper. It gave her a leg up in comparison to her school mates as she learned so much from Lynda.

Her life feels align and perfect, except for the fact that she's watching the life of her childhood best friend through the media. They try their bests to call or see each other whenever the Devils are playing the Leafs, but it is always a slight miss.

"Hey! I'm in Toronto for tonight until tomorrow around noon," Jack explained over the phone as he pulled his luggage out of the bus, "We should see each other, it's been so long!"

She smiled to herself at the sound of his sweet voice, oh, how much she missed him, "I know, we should! I have this paper due tonight so I can see you around 8?"

He groaned at the time, "I'm playing until like 10, what about after?"

"I can maybe stay out until 11? I have work in the morning so I need to be in bed by a certain time," Y/N sighed, knowing once again, it probably won't work, "And before you say anything, no, I cannot skip work because unlike you, I need this for my future." She teased

"Oh come on! You know if you just ask, I would pay for everything for you, you won't have to work another day for the rest of your life!"

"As tempting as that sounds, I refuse to be a sugar baby," Y/N laughed, putting her phone on her desk to continue typing away at her assignment.

"I'm literally in your city right now."

"I know that."

He rolled his eyes as he stepped foot into his hotel room, "Just come to the arena, please? Even if its for an hour, I want to- I need to see you."

Warmth filled her chest, it has been forever.

"Yeah, okay. I'll be there."

Y/N found herself standing where Jack told her to wait over the phone, the game ended half hour ago and the Devils won. She kept checking the time on her phone anxiously, waiting to hear something from him. She continued pacing on the spot, where was he?

The time on her phone hit 11PM, yet she still wanted to wait... at least for a bit longer. She wanted to see Jack so badly. With time progressing and the stress of her other obligations, and the annoyance crawling on her skin that Jack wasn't coming - Y/N decided to leave, even though her heart begged for her to stay and just wait.

As she sent her text to let him know that she was in fact back home after standing around for over and hour and ultimately deciding to order an Uber back home, she felt a wave of frustration.

Jack sounded so eager to see her, it had been years. He was in her city and although the time was tight, they were willing to make it work to see each other. But, he didn't show up. He got caught up with the media crew and his teammates, so he pushed her aside.

It's fine, she told herself while waiting for her body to go to sleep.

She stayed in touch with the Hughes family, often sending short and sweet messages on birthdays or during the holidays. Y/N knew that they were always rooting for her, even from Michigan. Ellen calls her more often than the rest, because in Ellen's eyes, Y/N is her daughter. She stays in the loop of Y/N's life, whether it be her school, home life, or the different experiences that she comes across in Toronto, Ellen wants to hear it all.

Luke also reaches out to Y/N more often than he would like to share, but in different ways in comparison to his mom. It's more TikTok's and Snapchats that they send to each other. He misses her more than anything else he left behind in Toronto.

Unfortunately, at every one of their attempts to visit or see each other, life comes in the way. It can't be helped considering the elite levels of hockey at Jack, Quinn, and Luke all partake in or the fact that Y/N is constantly swamped with the load of work from university. But for this summer, Luke is determined more than ever to bring the band back together.

It's nearing 7 years since the Hughes have seen Y/N, but with summer around the corner and the plans of the annual boys trip to the lake house and Y/N graduating with her bachelor's - it's essentially the perfect plan.

-----

Y/N looked around at the bustling airport of people searching for their suitcases, but she was looking for one person. Her chauffeur, Luke Hughes. It wasn't a difficult task since he stood out with his height and his New Jersey Devils hoodie.

His eyes locked onto hers and a massive grin drew upon his face and his arms opened as she immediately jumped into them, "Lukey!"

"Oh god fucking god," He said into her hair as they embraced each other for the first time in 7 years, "It's been way too long, like criminally too long"

"You're so tall now! You were so tiny the last time I saw you," She laughed as they pulled apart, "It is so good to see you."

He chuckled, "I can't believe you're here and not a figment of my imagination."

The two leave the airport and start their trip to the lake house, catching up on life on the drive.

"By the way," Luke turned to look at her as they reach a red light, "No one else knows you're coming. It's a surprise."

Y/N's eyes widened, "What?"

"Everyone wants to see you, okay? But if Jack knows then god knows something is going to come up, I swear something always does."

Suddenly, this trip is much more nerve-racking than she initially anticipated. What if they don't want her there? It's an annual boys trip and she's crashing it. Luke seems to notice her sudden change in behaviour and gives her shoulder a comforting squeeze,

"It's going to be perfect, trust."

Their car rolls into the driveway of the lake house and she is in shock. It is beautifully breathtaking. The sun shining through the leaves of the trees, and the gorgeous house that stood before her.

"Here goes nothing!" She breathed out, bracing herself for what could be the worst. Luke guided her towards the door to the house, abandoning their luggage in the trunk of the car.

Luke opened to door, "I'm here!" He called out while tucking Y/N behind himself to hide her.

A series of multiple loud footsteps approach them,

"Hey Lukey!" She can hear Quinn's voice, "You made it."

"Lil Hughes!" Another voice that she can't exactly place but sounded familiar to old FaceTime calls she had with Jack.

"Jack! Lukey's here!" A third voice shouts, before the one voice she was used to hearing over the phone chimes in,

"Took you long enough!"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Luke chuckled, "Had to make a lil detour."

"For?" Jack questioned before Y/N stepped out from behind Luke, "Y/N?"

"Hi Jack" She offered her signature smile, suddenly whatever nerves that were racing through her bloodstream diminished. In milliseconds she was engulfed into the tightest hug she'd ever been in. The soft scent of his shampoo mixed with the muskiness of his cologne surrounded her, blinding her sense. She wrapped her arms around his neck and legs around his waist as he spun them in circles.

He breathed her in, finally. The sweetness of her perfume and the warmth of her embrace. She was here.

"Oh my god, I can't believe you're here." Jack mumbled into her hair, placing multiple kisses on her temple as he careful put her back on her feet, "Look at you! My pretty girl!"

Y/N blushed while also staring at him and how beautiful he is in person. The waves of his hair and how the sun seemed to perfectly land on him, almost like a halo. It was evident that he'd been in the sun prior due to the gorgeous tan he had and the freckles sprinkled across his features. Her stomach did hundreds of flips as she took him in,

It didn't last long before she was pulled into another hug, a bear hug from the eldest Hughes brother, "You've grown up so much, Y/N. Last time I saw you, you were the star hockey player and now you're a university graduate."

Tears welled up in her eyes while she squeezed Quinn, "Says you, Captain Q!"

He released her and ruffled up her hair like how he always did, "Lukey, you outdid yourself with this surprise."

Luke laughed, "I know I did. Also, Y/N, this is Trevor and Cole!" He quickly introduced to her.

"Hi guys, it's so nice to finally meet you," She beamed, finally putting the pieces together that she has in fact met both of them over FaceTime with Jack.

"Rowdy! You never told me how jawdroppingly gorgeous Smiley is, holy shit" Trevor exclaimed as he hugged her, "Please tell me you're single."

Jack shook his head in disapproval, "Off limits, Z, you know that."

"Nice to meet you too, Smiley!" Cole said, he also greeted her with an embrace, "Come, you and Lukey need to catch up with the drinking! What do you drink? White Claw? Beer? We have it all!"

The six of them stood around the kitchen island while chatting and sipping away at their drinks. Jack stood next to Y/N, keeping an arm around her shoulders and wanting to keep her close to him.

She leaned her head on his shoulder while she laughed at whatever joke Trevor was making.

"Come on, what are we doing inside? There's still sun out!" Luke pointed out and marched his way outside, the rest followed and they seated themselves around the fire pit. Quinn and Luke busied themselves with building the fire whilst Jack and Y/N sat next to each other, Trevor and Cole opposite to them.

"So tell me, Smiley," Trevor grinned, bringing his beer to his lips, "How come Jacky has never introduced us before?"

"Maybe because this is the first time we've seen each other since we were like... fifteen?"

Cole's eyebrows shot up, "Fifteen? Jesus, that's like forever!"

"Is that why he can't keep his hands to himself?" Trevor teased, pointing his bottle towards Jack, who kept an arm on the back her chair while adjusting the hat he was putting on.

"Oh come on now," Jack rolled his eyes, "She's been busy! Little miss prestigious Canadian university"

She gasped dramatically and lightly shoved his shoulder, "At least I have a degree! Something that noooone of you guys have."

"Oh, you hurt me, Y/N!" Cole cried jokingly, "Good for you though, I honestly... Could never!"

The sun began to lower and the six sat in their chairs, listening to her stories of university and her plans for work after summer ends. Jack brought up old stories of her history with hockey, poking at the fact that she could have gone pro if she wanted. She only brushed off the comments, claiming that she would rather write than to play the game.

"In all seriousness," Quinn started, looking directly at the girl who he still could not fathom was fully grown to be a woman rather than a teenager, "We're all really happy to have you here. I know things haven't been easy since we moved away from Toronto and who knew that we would be here together now."

She smiled softly at Quinn, "Thanks, Q. I'm glad to be here, it's something I think I needed for the longest time."

Luke pulled out the ingredients to make s'mores, him, Trevor, and Cole competing with each other on who can make the best one. The breeze picked up and Y/N shivered slightly, wishing she had grabbed her sweatshirt beforehand,

But, as per usual, Jack understood her without her even having to say a thing.

"Need another beer?" He asked Quinn, who nodded. Jack got up to grab another beer from the kitchen while also picking up one of his hoodies. He returned, handing his brother another tall boy and placing his sweater in Y/N's lap.

She looked up at him before carefully putting it on, "Thanks J"

His smell imprinted on the material, she only wished that she could bottle it up and keep it forever.

"You know I got you," He smiled while sitting back down. Jack moved his chair to be right next to hers so she could snuggle into his side.

"Lukey, that shits burnt!" Y/N laughed as Luke pulled his marshmallow away from the fire, to see that it was in fact completely charred.

They all stayed out for while longer, listening to Zach Bryan play off the speaker while talking about life. Slowly, one by one, they shuffled into the house to head to bed, leaving just Y/N and Jack outside.

"Do you want to go to bed? You had a long day," He said in a hushed tone, she tilted her head to look up at him - only realizing now how close their faces were.

"Maybe," She hummed, "I just like being here with you."

"Come on, it's getting cold." He told her while standing up, offering her his hand, "We can still hang out inside, yeah?"

They walked side by side, their arms brushing against each other as they entered the home. Once Jack had shut the glass door, he pulled her into another loving embrace,

"I still cannot believe you're actually here, you know. I think I've spent everyday missing you. No matter where I was, I was always missing you" Jack whispered, his lips brushing her forehead, "Every game, every event, fuck, like every day, all I wanted was for you to be there with me. I know you've been crazy busy, little miss bachelor's degree" She could feel his smile on her skin, and she melted a bit more to his touch,

"I was always thinking about you and what we missed out on by moving away. I always thought that one day we would be a smoking hot hockey couple in high school. Like, both are amazing at hockey plus you were so pretty but now you're even more gorgeous. I see every photo you send me or my mom or even post on Instagram and I don't think any of them did you justice for how beautiful you are."

"Jack..." She breathed out. She didn't know what to say but somehow these were the exact words that she had been waiting to hear for years.

"Maybe we lost our shot in our teenage years but hey, you have your degree, so many our chance is now. You can work in Jersey, I can pull strings for you. 'Cause right now, I don't want to even think about you being away from me ever again."

He looked down at her, seeing the runaway tear slip from her eye. His hands softly cupping her face, the pad on his thumb gently wiping it away. Just like how he did when they were just kids, "I want you with me all the time, you know what I mean?"

She nodded quickly, a quiet sob leaving her lips, "I know."

"What do you say pretty? You've been by my side forever but from a distance. No more distance, just you and me against the world?"

Y/N smiled through her glassy eyes, "I can be your sugar baby?" She joked, referencing an old phone call they shared earlier in the year. He laughed, carefully brushing away her tears,

"Yeah, baby, if thats what you want."

"A shot at forever, eh?" She beamed, placing a gentle kiss on his palm.

Jack place another kiss on her hair, "Forever."

"I think I can work with that."

[technovillain]

I see that a lot of ppl agree after the events of RoR that Clairvoyance must be Raz's specialty, right? Like what he pulled off there was kind of crazy. Especially considering he's 10 years old and he was also DEEP UNDERWATER, HIS DEEPEST DARKEST FEAR. Also just mentally completely separated from his body for a long time? Which is terrifying.

I haven't seen a lot of people talk about him using it heavily outside of the RoR mentions however. Can you imagine how cool doing that would be for an agent? Doing what he was doing with the fish in RoR but using it to being able to essentially astral project his consciousness anywhere. If a fly goes past him, and he uses CV on it, he stays that way until there's a deer in the woods, follows a deer to a crow, crow flies off way off into the sky, he hops from bird to bird in the sky, to a person in the window of an airplane, crosses an ocean, goes into a city, suddenly his mind can be in an entire different country.

I know a lot of people picture him as a really active field agent like Milla or Sasha but imagine the crazy remote reconnaissance work he could be doing. Meditating for long periods of time, getting a precise sequence of CV transfers to get into a top secret classified area and obtain valuable info. Especially cool considering we know he can still use his telepathy and speak to other psychics dozens of CVs deep. He could be the perfect scout and lookout at the same time and never even have to leave headquarters.

[fookinhellcurlyyy]

What are your thoughts on the theory that harry is leaving the Azoffs? Personally, I don't think he is leaving them because he seems to be good friends with Jeff, but I don't know. Things are weird lately.

Also, do you think he is leaving Columbia/Sony? There's no announcement of a renewal, but he was seen with Strnger last year. They seem to get along.

Hi, Anon!

Before I answer, I just wanna say that I’m still not as well-versed as others when it comes to contracts, so my points are based on what’s been discussed so far and what I personally agree with.

I don't know for sure, but I do think it’s kinda sus that H's name keeps popping up and being falsely used—twice already this year, with both FireAid and The Sphere (like Gina @twopoppies mentioned recently).

And another curious thing would be a certain discussion brought up in a group chat I am included in, and it was right after The Sphere denial news broke out. It was pointed out that in Variety500's update last December 18, 2024, neither Jeff Az*ff nor Irving Az*ff's profile mentioned H, and vice versa. That made me curious, though I wasn't able to pay attention much because of all the content we've gotten for the past week at least lol

Anyway, I started digging tonight after I saw your anon message (I wanted to collect my thoughts as much as possible and be coherent despite knowing little), to see if maybe they never really mentioned each other in past updates anyway—and maybe, it really doesn't mean anything.

Here's a breakdown of what I found (focusing on H and Jeff):

Harry — 2022, 2023, and 2024 Variety500 Honoree

I couldn't find H's 2023 profile, but his both 2022 and 2024, no label/management were mentioned.

Jeff — 2021, 2022, 2023, and 2024 Variety500 Honoree

For Jeff, H was mentioned in 2021 (his roster of music stars including H), 2022 (H's MSG permanent banner), and 2023 (speculations of his 'flagship artist' - H - possibly doing a residency at The Sphere in the future, which popped up again this year).

I think what made it more curious is that in Jeff's 2024 profile, there was a part that says "Jeffrey Azoff works with many of the company’s artists, including Lizzo, the Eagles, John Mayer and Jon Bon Jovi and U2." It could just be because he wasn’t as active last year and wasn’t considered “mention-worthy” for the profile this time around? Not sure. Either way, I found it very curious because H’s influence and visibility remained strong, even while he was on a well-deserved break. I didn't want to think much of it at first, but the more I sat with it, the more interesting it seemed—again, very curious.

I was debating if this is worth mentioning at this point but maybe it's good to share it anyway to get other people's opinion? I also asked Paz @hoovesandfloorpaws about it since they've been building a career/business masterpost and might be able to provide insights. 🥹

It might be nothing tbh. But saving all of these here anyway! 😂

And I think, even if H decides (or has already decided) not to renew his contract, that doesn’t necessarily mean we'd completely see the Az*ffs or the Str*ngers out of his life—especially since the music industry is such an interwoven web of personalities. And he might make different career moves but remain friends or at least be on decent terms with Jeff, imo.

[court-jester-stuff]

I very much agree with this. On one hand i do feel the need to say that we don't know a lot about regulus so he might as well have been a DE out of free will, however he was also born into a family where such believes were normalized. He was raised to believe all of that and its very fair to assume that becoming a DE was more of an expectation then a choice. In the end he also did change, he cared for Kreacher and did what he could to protect him.

What we don't know is if he believed in pureblood supremacy but i feel that's for own interpretation. (Personally, i believe he didn't know better, based on the way he was raised and such.) I believe that if Serius had gotten him out of that house and away from that family when he decided to leave (which preach, good he got out and got a good family) I do think he would've been a good person and been a great asset in the war against Voldy. He was one of the biggest reasons as to how Harry found the horcruxs, say what you want but that teenager died defying the man everyone feared.

On the other hand we have snape, who during his time as a student called his ONLY friend a slur used on people who were (i think?) being actively killed at the time. Snape had no reason to think this way or say what he said, so why did he do it? He insulted his only friend and when she decided to stop being friends with him he got upset. (Besides that he himself was muggleborn, ‘the half blood prince’ dumbass name btw, so why did he do that??)

Besides that, we have the fact that Lily loved James and not Snape. Lily didn't choose James over Snape, she simply chose James, which is a separate matter from Snape having been cruel to her in such a manner. Snape didn't have anything to do with that and yet he despised James for it. So much so that he bullied/treated his, but also her, son unfairly.

On top of that we have the fact that the only reason why he decided to become a spy was because Voldy began targeting Lily, not because he realized he was in the wrong or that the DE’s are bad. He only switched sides for his obsession with Lily. I fully believe that had it not been for Lily that he would’ve been Voldy’s most loyal DE till his death.

I saw someone say that he loved Lily and wasn’t obsessed but that’s not true. I saw someone else (I don’t remember where or who) make a very good point of James and Lily having fitting patronus, a stag and a doe compliment each other. They are their own people, but they work together. Snape had Lily’s doe, why? He doesn’t match her, he HAS her. Weird in my opinion.

On top of being all that, the man was unfair to any students that weren’t in his house, mainly the Gryffindor’s. Neville watched/had his parents be tortured to insanity by Bellatrix and yet she wasn’t the one that walked out of that closet. It was Snape. This teacher was so cruel to a child that he became the thing the kid feared the most. That’s fucked up.

In the first scene we have of him he asks Harry, a boy raised by muggles and who was cut off by any and all types of magic his whole life, an advanced question. Which I’m pretty sure was a trick question cuz the two things were the same, but don’t quote me on that.

Snape wasn’t good. Ever. He had an insane obsession with Lily, she was the sole reason as to why he decided to help the Order. Not because he believed in their beliefs. Snape was a terrible person and most definitely not the hero some make him out to be.

"you can't defend regulus and not defend snape"

actually, yes, i can. watch me.

snape was a child abuser, who regularly insulted, embarrassed and physically injured his students on a daily basis. he only was part of the order bc he had an unhealthy obsession with his childhood bestfriend, who he called a slur on several occasions. who he, on top of trying to kill her husband, didn't care about her child or family until her life was in danger. he only became "good" when the woman who had rejected him several times might have been injured. he was such a terrible teacher and human being, that one of his student's BIGGEST FEAR was him. he was racist and a blood supremecist, even though he was a half a blood himself. he was not "morally gray", he was a horrible person.

regulus black was forced to become a death eater by his family, and in the end, betrayed voldemort and gave up his life to try to end the war. he loved his house elf, and did everything to make sure kreacher made it out alive. he was not an abuser, he was the abused.

so, yes, i can defend regulus and not defend snape.

[luminilial]

ᡣ Unexpected Encounter, But Fated To Meet 𐭩

Summary: realizing that your parents were struggling with financials, you decided to help them by taking up on a part-time job in a small Cafe in order to support them, including yourself. At first, it went surprisingly well—with you heading to the Cafe after school on a specific day, start working until the sun sets, and when your shift ends, you clock out. But one day, someone you knew from school had accidentally found you working, making you anxious at first. This became the worst moment in your life—! ...Or did it?

Note: To whoever requested this, I hope you like it! (Credits to loichiha on Twitter/X for the art)

Request inbox: open (Phainon only, fluff) feel free to request, as long as it's in my capability.

As the clock continued to tick with each passing moments, serving as a reminder that school was about to end soon for today, students were busy preparing to get home by tidying up their personal belongings and putting them into their bags. This way, they would only need to wait for the school bell to ring, and then go home right away.

Some were already planning to get home right away, choosing to spend the rest of the day by lounging in the house—while others preferred to hang out with their friends first, spending time together in a destinated location or working on group projects, so that they would have loads of free times on the weekends, etc.

But you, you already had a place to go to—from the moment junior year had started for you, you already had a scheduled plan in mind on where to go on this specific day.

You were going to work; as a part-time barista.

"(Name), let's hang out!" One of your friends called for you from a distance, standing next to the others who were still busy putting in their belongings as the rest of the students started scrambling out of the door, the school bell already ringing to give them the final cue that they needed to hear.

Checking your bag one more time to ensure that you wouldn't leave something behind in the class, your head turned to look over at the mention of your name, seeing your friends looking at you with smiles plastered on their faces, expecting for you to agree to their plan.

As much as you wanted to agree and spend time with your close friends after school, you didn't let the idea of hanging out to deter you from the original plan that you had already set up on what you're about to do after school.

With a guilty smile, you zipped your bag before slinging it over your shoulders, turning to move and approach your friends. "Sorry guys, I can't. I already have a plan that I'm about to do today after school." You explained, hoping that they would understand, considering that you would often excused yourself from doing any activities after school on this specific day.

Your friends gave eachother momentary glances, before their attentions diverted back to you. "Aww, you're busy again?" One of them decided to say, the same girl that had asked you to hangout with them. You could sense the disappointment from her tone, as well as the others' faces upon hearing the same excuse that you would always say almost everytime.

With a breathy chuckle, you apologized again for the inconvenience. "Sorry..." You mumbled, before most of them let out a sigh, feeling disappointed that you weren't going to be there for their hangout again. Nonetheless, they nodded. "It's fine. You're always busy on this day anyway, so it's not a surprise." Your friend reassured, before smiling.

"But don't forget to leave some free times for us in your schedule aside from today!" She told you, to which you nodded. "Don't worry, I will." You assured, confident that you would get to spend time with them aside from today.

Adjusting the straps of your bag, you looked at your friends with another smile, before walking passed by them, not forgetting to give them a proper farewell. "Well then, I'll be going now!" You announced, waving them a goodbye.

They reciprocated your action with their owns, waving you a goodbye and wishing that you would be safe along the road. "Okay, stay safe, (Name)!" One of them exclaimed, before seeing your figure walked out of the door, leaving them to their own accords in the empty classroom.

"...Do you think that (Name) secretly has a boyfriend?" One of them decided to bring up the topic out of nowhere, whispering to the others before all of them started to indulge themselves by figuring out the truth behind your tight schedule. "Or a girlfriend, maybe?"

"What? No way! Maybe— but why bring that up?"

"I won't be surprised if they do. They're always busy on this day everytime."

"Who knows? maybe they are secretly going on dates with their lover behind our backs. That's why they always say no whenever we ask them to spend time with us after school."

"Woah, wait— but that would be cruel though! If that's true, why would they choose to hide it from us and secretly go on dates with their lover without our knowledge?!"

"Everyone has personal stuff that they would much prefer be hidden away from others to avoid unnecessary conflicts—including them. Who are we to judge?"

"Haha, she's right!" One of them who had been quiet decided to acknowledge, agreeing with the friend who gave words of wisdom.

"Although, now I'm itching to follow them—to see if you're right."

"No. Well, yes— I do too, but let's just wait and see if we're actually right or not in the end to confirm our theory, okay?"

"Finee..." Most of them proceeded to say at the same time, before they changed the topic to the plan they were about to do after this, acting as if they didn't just create a wild assumption about you.

Despite the misunderstanding that your friends had assumed about you, thinking that you actually had a lover without their knowledge—you continued to walk by the roadside with a firm but casual manner, unaware of what was going on at school between your friends.

One thing's for certain though; you were about to head to work, to your part-time job.

Opening the door to the Cafe, the little bell above it chimed soundly, signalling to everyone in the room that someone had just came in; you.

The employees who noticed you decided to greet you with smiles plastered on their faces—feeling pleased that you had arrived. Most of them being older than you, but you didn't mind, since you're only here to work on a specific time due to your role as a highschool student.

Reciprocating their kind actions, you waved a hand to them with a smile, feeling more upbeat than ever to start working after they greeted you with opened arms. You had always viewed them as parental figures, due to their ages being far bigger than you. To be honest, it felt nice working with them, since they're more experienced when it comes to working in a Cafe—that way, you can always rely on them if you ever need any help, regarding your duty as a young worker here.

Entering a room specifically for employees, you changed your school uniform to the uniform that you had to wear in order to blend in with the others. After you're done, you walked out of the room to help the others by cleaning the place and preparing stocks in order to not be out of products, before you walked behind the counter; expecting for your first customer to enter the room.

"...(Name)? How rare! I didn't expect to see you here." Someone exclaimed from across the counter, their voice being far too familiar for you to assume that it was just some regular customer. You were busy checking the money in the cash register to notice who it was at first—but at the mention of your name, your head instinctively looked up, wondering who the person was.

Which left you baffled.

Standing across from you, there was a white-haired boy, appearing to be in the same age as you, his aquamarine eyes being one of the visible characteristics that would always leave people to be mesmerized when they got the chance to look into them from a close distance. His broad shoulders in tact, as well as his height being taller than an average man, making his presence to be known when he entered the room.

But most importantly; his smile. The same smile that would make people be relaxed everytime they got the chance to see it, letting their guard down in the bask of his positive nature.

The smile that you're all too familiar with.

Phainon.

Your eyes widened when you noticed who the person was, feeling a rush of panic tumbling down on you, in fear of someone you know finding out that you're working behind school's gates—not that it actually mattered.

"...Phainon?! What— what are you doing here...?" Your words came out in an abrupt tone, due to the sheer shock after realizing that one of your classmates from school had now seen you in your working garments, acting as a barista.

Your question caught Phainon off guard, not expecting for you to ask something like that, making him to raise an eyebrow at you. "What am I doing here? What are you doing here?" He chuckled, tilting his head. "I didn't expect for someone like you to be working here, (Name)." He commented, crossing his arms with amusement, deciding to indulge himself by teasing you once in a while.

However, when he noticed the anxious look coming from the way your expression fidgeted, he chuckled again, deciding to drop the idea, for now. "Don't worry, I come in peace. I just wasn't expecting to see you of all people to be here, (Name)." He continued, looking at you with his usual signature smile, albeit wider. "Does your parents own this place? Or are you actually working here?" He decided to inquire, not being able to hide his questions to himself, since this moment was too good of a coincidence to let it slip by from his grasp.

After you managed to calm yourself, you shook your head, which made Phainon intrigued. "No, I'm... Yes, I'm actually working here." You admitted, couldn't help but tap your foot behind the counter to express your nervous system. "My parents are low on money, so I wanted to take up on a part-time job in order to support them, including myself, since I want to go to college." You explained in a low tone, hands behind your back, gaze focused toward anything else beside the boy in front of you.

Phainon noticed the way you expressed your nervousness, but he decided to not divulge the matter, choosing to respect your boundary. Nodding, he brought his arms down. "I see. College, huh? Well, with those reasons, it's no wonder why you decided to take up on a part-time job." He acknowledged, nodding again with his eyes closed. "Though, out of every jobs I could think of—I didn't expect for you to be working as a cashier here." He commented, wanting to talk with you more.

Hearing his comment, your gaze shifted back to him, mouth hung open at the assumption before you shook your head again. "Ah, no... I'm actually a barista, but I sometimes help my senior colleagues whenever they're busy with something, by helping them clean the Cafe or being a cashier." You corrected him, one of your hands moving as you explained.

Your correction toward his comment made Phainon more intrigued, his eyes glinting with amusement. "Barista, huh? Interesting." He murmured, before glancing at somewhere else, noticing that you were the only one standing behind the counter. "Then, could I trouble you to take up my order? Since you're the only one here right now." He asked, taking this opportunity to have his order be made by you.

Not seeing through his underlying intention, you nodded, smiling genuinely now. You were pretending to be a cashier right now, after all, but also a barista at the same time. "Of course! What would you like to order?" You exclaimed, one of your hands reaching out to take one small note and a pen in order to take his order.

Fingers under his chin, Phainon decided to order what he wanted. "I'll have a..." You kept your eyes peeled to the note in your hand, as you scribbled the words that he said, unaware of the other's gaze as he observed you being so focused in your job. Cute.

After you're done, you tore your gaze away from it to look up. "Alright, your order will be ready in about a few minutes. Please sit anywhere you'd like while I make them." You confirmed his order, continuing to smile at him.

He reciprocated your smile with his own, nodding his head. "Appreciate it." He replied, turning around to find a seat that would be comfortable for himself. But, just as he started walking, he looked over his shoulder to steal a glance at you—who was busy preparing his order, too focused to notice his sneaky look, but he smiled, nonetheless.

Maybe, he should come back to this Cafe again from time to time—just so he could watch you work and strike up a conversation with you in order for both of you to get closer with eachother.

Cleaning the tables, you were preparing to head back home after your shift ended, making sure to not make it late at night since you weren't allowed by the manager to work until that period of time, due to your role as a student.

Unbeknownst to you, someone had been watching you from his seat, not moving an inch—but you were still too dedicated in your job to notice that his presence was still lingering in the Cafe. Just as you finished sweeping the floor, you turned around to change uniform; preparing to head home.

Phainon, who had been watching you from afar from the start, took the last sip from his drink before smiling, deciding to get up from his seat when he noticed that you were about to clock out from your shift.

This was his chance.

"Are you finished?" He questioned, appearing out of nowhere in front of you, which ended up making you startled, not expecting for him to still be in the Cafe. You were already changed into your school uniform, matching with his own set of ones. It would be an understatement if Phainon's sudden presence didn't make your heart almost leaped out of your body.

"P-phainon!" You blurted out, one of your hands clutching your chest at his sudden presence, catching you by surprise. "Why are you— you were here all this time...?" You murmured, not expecting for him to surprise you for the second time today. Phainon, who noticed you getting startled due to his presence, chuckled in a guilty manner.

"Ah, sorry. I didn't mean to startle you." He apologized, hands in his pockets, before diverting his attention back to your question. "Why, yes. I was wondering when are you going to clock out from your shift." He mentioned, looking down to take in your school uniform. "Are you heading home now?" He asked, before his voice took a softer turn. "...Want to go home together? I can accompany you there, to your house—if you'd like." He offered, hoping that you would accept.

Was he being obvious regarding his intentions? Yes. Would he prefer to let this chance slip by in order to maintain his dignity? Of course not.

"Huh? Oh— no, it's fine. You don't have to." You declined, waving your hand. "I don't want to end up burdening you. Besides, my house is a bit far from our school." You added, knowing that you would have to pass by your school again if you want to get home, so you didn't want to end up dragging Phainon along—who lives in god knows where. You expected that he would understand and go home now, but you ended up underestimating the guy's effort.

"Nonsense! I insist." He exclaimed, closing his eyes with a huge smile. "I don't know if you knew this, but my house is actually close to yours." He suddenly mentioned, opening his eyes again. "I've always seen you walking home whenever I'm hanging out with my friends in our neighborhood, so I ended up assuming that your house is probably closer to mine than I expected." He explained, tilting his head before continuing.

"Which also means that we can walk home together! So? You up for it?" He asked again, feeling his smile becoming wider when he realized that there was no way you were about to decline his offer again, leaning a bit closer to you in order to showcase how eager he was to walk home with you, giving you a look that would make you hesitate to decline.

He looked like a puppy, you thought to yourself.

Shaking your head at the subconscious thought, you felt your cheeks heat up a little at how close his face was, but not close enough to make you uncomfortable. He must be so eager to walk home with you, judging by how he didn't back down when you declined his offer at first. Keeping your composure maintained, you gave up on trying to decline.

Nodding your head, you agreed to his offer, making him very pleased. "Great! I knew you'd come around." He claimed, before backing up to give you some space. "Well then... let's go." He said, keeping his hands in his pockets in order to hide how they kept fidgeting due to the rush of excitement building up.

In the end, you and Phainon decided to converse with eachother on the way home, walking passed by your school in order to get to your houses. The more you two talked to pass the time, the more you felt that your bond with him had become closer than it used to. Phainon must've felt this too—which is why he kept smiling as he matched your pace, enjoying both of your conversation.

What was once normal classmates who barely talked—turned into something more. You felt your lips curved up, feeling a new friendship had been formed with the white-haired boy.

Unbeknownst to you, it was something far more than just friendship. But you don't need to know that now, do you?

[jegulushq]

J.K. Rowling is still a massive transphobe, and for how much I love this story and the Marauders fandom in particular (which was supposed to be a safe space for trans people and the biggest rejection of her, where the majority of the creators are trans and we made the characters queer in every possible way!), I understand why we keep coming back to it for nostalgia because I grew up with it too. However, I still don't agree with giving more of my money to her because she is actively supporting organizations that work to strip trans people of their rights, actively hurting them. She is also using her platform to spread transphobia and hate quite regularly. I don't understand how you can say you support trans people and that you hate her if you think it’s okay to give her your money by supporting the new Harry Potter TV show, going on tours of the Harry Potter studio, continuing to buy official merchandise, playing the official games, or even purchasing the books again. Unfortunately, she is still alive and using her money in that way. While we can't take back what we already gave her before knowing what she stood for, we can stop moving forward.

And the transphobic people in the fandom who always have negative comments about trans or gender non-conforming HEADCANONS in a fandom that is almost entirely made up from the fans can simply go fuck themselves.

You shouldn't be welcomed in this space, and it's unacceptable that you make trans creators feel unsafe and attempt to harass them out of it. You should be the ones feeling unwanted here, not them, and if you're part of any other queer label, you should be deeply ashamed of yourself.

Look up your own history and realize that without trans people, you would have exactly zero rights. When they are in danger, that danger will not stay away from you because cishet homophobic people don't care that you're not trans. They will hate you because you're queer. You're not saving yourself by trying to remove the "T" from the community, and trans people have always been the ones to fight the hardest for all of us, even while being the most marginalized.

So learn your history and be smart about it at least, if you really can't have basic empathy for other people simply because they are trying to live and be happy like everyone else.

To all the others that say that they do care, show it with your actions, support trans creators and avoid giving your money to JKR

[nabi-unveiled]

I've picked my jaw up off the floor from the peak makjang messiness of Episode 6 of Secret Relationships.

Conclusion: It's hella fun, but it's not "good".

Yes, there is a difference.

When I talk about "good", I'm typically referencing the more technical aspects of writing, cinematography, acting, etc. In this case, it's the writing committing the majority of our crimes.

Note - the reverse can also be true. There are productions that are technically and narratively excellent that I find dreadfully dull.

I'd rather shows be entertaining and good. But if the choice must be made - I'll choose entertaining every time. This show is definitely that for me. I'm having a blast.

Explaining why I made this conclusion would take longer than I have time-wise at the moment. I'll want to properly organize the evidence. Hopefully, I'll have time Sunday or Monday. (There are some really cool framing shots we could discuss too, but I don't know if I'll go there or not.)

In any case - I'm still here for these messy characters. I love it when things happen that are not on my bingo card. It's still committing fewer narrative crimes than The Boy Next World finale 🙈. (Side note: I still haven't worked up the courage for the ThamePo finale)

Going forward - I really hope they lean into the insanity. That's what this show has going for it in spades.

The two things I'm now contemplating (that are mostly independent of my criticisms of the script itself).

Things to Ponder #1: Da-on and Su-hyeong's kiss.

Facts are - Da-on kissed him. He was actively participating in the kiss. You could argue that Su-hyeong was somewhat forcing him into it, but I DEFINITELY don't see that as true. Why? Because, Da-on isn't passive in this one. He's actively kissing back. We KNOW he'll avoid if he doesn't want it. He does it with Jae-min later in the episode.

I do think it's possible that he wasn't sure if he wanted the kiss or not (just like holding hands with Sung-hyun) and he went with it. He's definitely a character that defaults to going with the flow until he makes a decision. Da-on's the one that stops the kiss when he decides it has went too far, he's feeling bad about Sung-hyun, and he's sure he doesn't want it. When he finally made a decision is when the kiss stopped. Su-hyeon still spent the night, and it doesn't look like he pursued it further. Da-on seems to have slept on the couch.

Frankly, Da-on's a weird character. I personally don't see him as a doormat or meek mouse character. He's making choices that doormats don't typically make. His behavior doesn't match the typical doormat archetype either (particularly with Sung-hyun). However, I couldn't really tell you what other term I'd use for him at the moment. He's a very strange mix of passive and spitfire. He's competent and confident until he's not. He lets things happen to him until he suddenly pulls the brakes. He has a lot of pride (another strike against the doormat). He shares some elements with a "candy girl" character from old k-dramas, but he definitely doesn't share enough of them for me to call him that. I digress.

What is frustrating is that we don't know enough about Da-on to fully understand him and know exactly where he is on this line of participating in the kiss.

Because this dialogue should mean something (beyond him driving Sung-hyun away).

But I don't know what the hell it means. Who did he abandon? Does he feel like he abandoned Jae-min for Su-hyeon? Does he feel like he abandoned Su-hyeon for Jae-min? Were there other parties in the mix over the years? We don't know, because the show is keeping backstory WAY too close to the chest in an attempt at surprising reveals.

My personal head canon at the moment: Da-on and Su-hyeon were having regular makeout sessions even while Su-hyeon was "dating" Jae-min. Su-hyeon agreed not to date him; he didn't agree not to kiss him. That's why Da-on feels like he's a bad person. That's why he scolded Su-hyeon saying that it was going to hurt Jae-min that Su-hyeon was flirting with him on the bleachers/steps. I would love if this were true as it would mean Jae-min had missed something.

Things to Ponder #2 - My pretty-in-pink mastermind stabbing himself.

I find this actor way more attractive than I should in this situation, and I'm still not over his sweater matching the plates. But I now get to ponder...WHY did he stab himself?

Is this because he's lost all control? The chess pieces have been knocked over.

Is it because he's trying to emotionally manipulate Da-on? A type of "leave me and I'll off myself". Because Da-on is obviously still struggling with considering Jae-min ALL bad and cutting ties. Because there is NO good reason for Da-on to still want to talk to him.

Is it because he's trying to threaten Da-on? I'm sure he could make this look like Da-on stabbed him. I know there are a few "villains" that have done that in the past. Most have done it to make the protagonist look bad in front of a crowd though. I'm trying to think of a villain that's used it in private. I feel like there's at least one. I just can't think of it at the moment. In any case, we know this man plays the long game and he plays hardball.

Did I miss some options? Probably. Because I don't trust the writing on this makjang at all. That said - I'm buying popcorn for next week.

[buckydeservesthebest]

Yeah, it always seemed to me that the Winter Soldier's blank zombie status makes him something like an AI, in the sense that he is… I hate to say it… a useful tool to solve or perform a task, which he was taught how to solve previously by his programmer (Hydra).

An AI is much more useful than a normal person to solve X task because it is based on the algorithm with which it was programmed, but an AI cannot solve problems that its programmer has not taught it how to solve, that is why they are not very useful when used in solving problems that require deep analysis and more abstract reasoning.

As we have already commented on other occasions, the Winter Soldier has no sense of self, no emotions, desires, beliefs, motivations, aspirations, likes or dislikes, no thoughts of its own, not even the ability to make decisions. He's a non-person just like an AI will never do more or have the initiative to do anything other than what its handler asks it to do. In fact, we haven't even seen him relate himself to the name or call himself 'Winter Soldier.'..

That's why I was never sold on the idea that WS had “almost smiled” when he shot Steve in the Helicarrier, because the act of smiling cannot be detached from an emotional origin. And he literally has no emotions due to deliberate damage to his limbic system (as stated in The Wakanda Filles). For it is precisely when a tiny fraction of Bucky's emotions and/or memories manifest, that he begins to regain a modicum of autonomy and no longer follows the orders his handlers have given him.

So I think it's safe to say that his robotic behavior is indeed given by brain damage, C-PTSD, absolute amnesia, the effects of psychotropic drugs that affect his cognition *and* the mind control that puts him into a kind of sleep-like trance (in which his brain activity is as low as that of a person sleeping in REM sleep).

I've seen a lot of differing opinions on how aware Bucky was as the Winter Soldier under brainwashing. Some say he was fully aware but just indoctrinated into wanting to follow orders, while others say he was a programed machine with no control basically.

I just wanted to ask what your opinion on that topic was. I love your other metas btw 💕

Sorry for the late reply! I’ve been somewhat away from Tumblr and I’ll try to work through the bunch of asks that I’ve missed.

The theories that say Bucky was aware and simply indoctrinated tend to be based on his comics origin. I haven’t actually read Brubaker’s run myself, but my understanding is comics Bucky was far more aware of his actions. While I think he still didn’t know his true identity because of his amnesia, he had far more self-awareness and independent thought.

For me, MCU Bucky is not someone who had the capacity to make his own decisions. The fact that the “wipe” manages to deprive him of every frame of reference including even his most recent memories of his missions means he simply doesn’t have the understanding to make judgements. It also seems to me that they erase his sense of identity - comics Bucky may not know his true identity, he at least had an intact sense of self, while MCU Bucky has a robotic, impersonal demeanour when he’s freshly wiped and in mission mode (both the Helicarrier scene and the Civil War activation scenes show Bucky in this very mechanical, depersonalised state). Certainly both of those scenes suggest Bucky doesn’t have much contextual awareness of who and what he’s fighting for. In particular in the Civil War scenes, it suggests that voluntary thought was stripped from him when he’s “activated” by the code words. He doesn’t respond to Howard calling his name, nor does he recognise Sam and Steve later when Zemo activates the Soldier.

I think a lot of the early meta (from 2014) theorised that maybe he was only brainwashed because of that grand speech Pierce gives him (“Your work has been a gift to mankind. You shaped the century. I need you to do it one more time”). He seems to be appealing to the Bucky that we remember from CATFA, who would’ve stepped up at the beckoning of a greater cause. But to me, that scene was…maybe a bit of Pierce’s mockery and also his manipulation. He refuses to tell Bucky who he’s actually fighting against, and speaks in vague terms about what Bucky’s mission was for. We never see any hint that Bucky knew or understood what cause he was fighting for. As soon as Bucky asks who Steve is, Pierce first minimises and then shuts him down swiftly with the wipe. Bucky also doesn’t respond to Pierce’s pontification — we could either interpret that as him being distracted by his memories of Steve, or that the preaching was just performative on Pierce’s part because Bucky had no idea anyway.

[gam3r-girli3]

❛ lust at first bite ❜

trigger warnings: vampire reader so contains descriptions of blood and mentions a dead body.

note: yes i played the vampire mystery in saint denis the other day and yes i couldn't stop picturing arthur with a fem!vampire reader where he isn't sure if he's more scared or turned on oop-

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From a distance, one might mistake them for an intoxicated couple being a little too intimate in public, making onlookers blush and quickly look away. But the sinking feeling in Arthur's gut said otherwise.

The first thing he noticed when she lifted her head - aside from the blood dripping down the corners of her full lips - was her eyes. The way that even in the darkness they shone like two brilliant rubies, almost as red as the blood that dripped down her chin and onto the ground.

Arthur had never seen anything so lethal and otherworldly yet so dangerously beautiful at the same time. She looked like a goddess, an avenging angel. The phrase 'hell hath no fury like a woman scorned' sprung to mind, because the way she was glaring at him was nothing short of furious.

"Can't a lady enjoy her meal in peace?" she hissed, voice venomous.

Arthur's fingers twitched on his holster, wrapped securely around the handle of his revolver.

The woman (creature? she-devil?) noticed. Her lips curled up into a mocking smile, almost bordering pitying.

"Do you really think bullets will hurt me?" she purred, stepping away from the body and paying it no notice as it slumped down on the ground, devoid of life.

"What were you doin' to that man?"

She tilts her head, coy and mischievous. "What do you think?"

Arthur's eyes narrow in suspicion. "I ain't quite sure what to think."

Her head falls back and a melodious laugh bounces from her open mouth. It sends shivers down his spine, filling him with a sense of primal dread, like a prey caught in the snare of a predator.

Run, his gut screams. Shoot, his instincts roar after years of being a gunslinging outlaw.

With her head tipped back and her mouth open, Arthur thought he saw a glimpse of - could that be? It was. Fangs. Elongated fangs, the tips coated in fresh blood.

"I think you stumbled upon the wrong alley in Saint Denis, cowboy."

Arthur couldn't agree more.

Once her laughter - haunting, frightening, alluring - dies down, she takes a moment to observe him in silence that causes goosebumps to prick on his skin, his hair standing on edge. His entire body was on alert, aware that he was in the presence of something truly dark and malevolent and wrong.

He breaks the silence first, unable to stop the question from spilling out. "What the hell are you?"

She merely blinks, lips still curled upwards. "Guess."

Irritation bleeds into his voice, his frustration building. "You ever give a straight answer?"

"I find plain answers boring. I prefer riddles." She takes a step forward, testing. "Why else would you be here? You followed all my clues."

Arthur swallowed thickly. He'd almost forgotten about the strange writings he'd found on the walls in alleyways and on the corners of buildings he'd discovered around the city. At first, he'd thought it a little curious and amusing, but as he'd stumbled upon a few more, he'd began to actively try and track down the rest, his curiosity growing into something more insatiable.

The writings had formed a map - a map that led him here, to her.

She'd led him here from the very beginning.

And the look gleaming in her eyes said that she enjoyed every second of his confusion and fear.

"Why?"

"Why not?"

His eyes fall to the corpse slumped motionless on the ground. She notices where his eyes drift to and her lips curl even more, flashing a sliver of those sharp fangs at him.

"You're afraid."

Arthur wants to protest. It's a natural instinct to deny his fear, but the words die on the tip of his tongue.

He's been running from the law for years, pulling off train and stage coach robberies, even running scams with Hosea. He's killed a lot of people, mostly ones who deserved it. Rival gangs often targeted him on the road, ambushed him when he came to a bridge or a slope. He'd dodged countless bullets, even survived a few that he couldn't move out of the way of quick enough. His body - old and ugly as it was, made even uglier by the innumerous scars he had to prove it all.

But something about this encounter made all of that feel like nothing but child's play. He'd gladly take a bullet than be where he was, trapped in the hungry gaze of a deadly predator, a creature he didn't quite understand.

"It's alright to be afraid. It's only natural," she says, cool as the breeze, as if she wasn't still wearing her 'meal' on her chin, dripping down from the corners of her upturned lips.

"Nothin' about this seems natural to me."

A hum reverbetes from her throat. "I suppose you're wondering if you're going to be my dessert."

There it was.

Arthur's hand tightens around his revolver and he rips it out of the holster, lightening quick, like he'd done many times before in a draw - only, unlike any draw he'd been in, he was far too slow.

In the blink of an eye, within the time it'd taken him to draw his gun, she was mere inches in front of him.

His heart leaapt up into his throat. No human could have moved that fast. It wasn't possible.

She wraps her hand - slender, pale, soft looking - around the barrel of the revolver, gently tilting it up to her head. Her ruby eyes lock with his, unafraid, unblinking.

"You can shoot if you want," she drawls gently. "But it won't kill me - not for long, anyway."

The outlaw is frozen, taken by surprise. Usually when he'd aimed a gun at someone, they'd cower or shoot back. Never had anyone stared back at him so calmly. Death usually invoked a reaction of fear or anger, but never acceptance.

Her relaxed composure never faltered. There was no flicker of alarm or panic in her eyes, nothing to suggest she was staring down the barrel of a gun - literally.

"Or, you can receive your reward for finding me."

Those words jarred him out of his confusing maelstrom of thoughts.

"Reward?" He echoes uncertainly.

"Did you think I just led you here to feed from you? You tracked down all my clues and then found me. You've earned a reward."

A shiver of uneasiness and something else - something hungrier, almost anticipatory - shot down his spine.

Those words had no business sounding so damn alluring coming from the mouth of such a bloodthirsty monster. But she wasn't just a monster - or rather, she was, but in the body of a beguiling, ethereal woman.

Like a pretty flower one might stumble upon in the wilderness and decide to pick it - only to realise soon after touching it that it was indeed poisonous. But something about this particular deadly flower standing before him made that poison seem almost worth dying for a taste of.

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note: lmk if you want a part 2 where arthur gets his 'reward' 😉

[lemotmo]

I might actually die from anticipation. Anyway I agree with all of this! We're getting Buddie canon!!

Q. The last 5 minutes of that episode felt like they were at warp speed. But the Buddie stuff we got was so good!!! I can't actually believe those scenes are canon! I'm very annoyed at the Ryan stuff and dear god the Lou stuff, but everything else was so good! I feel like I'm flying!

A. The last 5 minutes gave me whiplash, anon, I agree. Any other time I would have said the Buddie scene at the end should have been cut and moved to the beginning of the next episode because it didn't really fit, and they did have to rush through the Maddie rescue to get it into the episode. But the context of that scene was necessary for upcoming episodes, and since I believe we're getting some kind of time jump as we open episode 11, they didn't really have a choice. The scene needed to be there and it was a PERFECT Buddie scene.

I will touch the Lou nonsense in this one ask, and I won't answer another one. For me personally it feels like trolling. He knew exactly what kind of pic to post and it's absolutely the kind of immature bullshit he finds funny. He could have been doing anything. 911 is not the only thing that shoots on that lot. ABC isn't the only studio who uses that lot. I think he knew exactly what he was doing and he found it funny. That's my personal take. Tommy serves no narrative purpose anymore. The Tommy part of Buck's brain officially died last night. There is no story reason to bring him back for a scene. Does that mean Tim won't? Nope, but if he does it would be for the sole purpose of having the audience see Buck actively choose Eddie. It would be used as a way to give Buck back the agency he kind of lost during their breakup. That would be the only reason he was there. And it's not necessary. Now it's possible Tim is tired and so he has written in a scene that would explicitly have Buck say out loud he doesn't want him, and it was never about him. That's also not unlike Tim. So it's one of those options, but I still personally feel like he was just attention seeking and it's nothing.

I haven't seen the Ryan stuff personally, thank god. Yay for my dash curation! I've heard about it from mutuals and asks but I haven't physically seen it myself. That being said, streaming services have obliterated an entire generation's ability to watch television. They genuinely don't know how to watch a television show. They don't understand how to WATCH. They want immediate satisfaction and answers and bullet point explanations for everything. The show has made it clear where this thing is headed. There is no more room for doubt. They are two characters on the same path going towards the same conclusion, however Buck is further along on the path. Eddie is still behind him because Eddie's route on the path has a detour (Christopher and Texas). That means Oliver can make acting choices and interview answer choices that Ryan cannot make yet. Oliver has fully made the turn. He is 100% playing Buck as in love with Eddie. And Buck is going to fully realize it either in episode 11 or 12. It's coming quickly for Buck. Eddie is not at that stage yet though so Ryan has to be more subtle. Ryan played the truck scene (the fact that scene is canon makes me want to climb the wall, twirl my hair, and kick my feet), and the goodbye scene perfectly. He was perfect in those scenes. Not only could you see the weight on him you could feel the weight on him. The uncertainty. The confusion about everything. The dialogue was loud but everything Ryan did with the dialogue, and silently without any dialogue was louder. He didn't look at Buck in the truck when he said 'it's not nothing'. He was awkward at the uhaul when it was time to say their goodbyes. They both played that scene so pitch perfect it gave me goosebumps. He allowed all the emotions Eddie was feeling to play out on his face. The subtle shift with his eyebrows during their hug was heartbreaking because it was Eddie taking a moment to realize what he's walking away from, and all the different emotions happening inside of him in that moment. There is a part of Eddie that knows. Ryan's playing it like that. Ryan is playing it as if Eddie was forced to choose between his son and Buck and he chose his son, as he should have, but that doesn't mean that leaving Buck isn't breaking his heart. And he doesn't have the mental strength to examine that more closely just yet. He's just trying to convince himself that what he's doing is right and for the best so it doesn't matter that he's hurting himself to make this choice. Ryan demonstrated all of that in that scene and anyone who's trying to argue otherwise is lying to themselves. And Eddie looked back! Abby never looked back, but Eddie did!! He looked back at Buck! That entire scene was god tier and I need people to understand that.

I also need people to understand that these scenes are not for the fandom. Obviously we eat them up, but their not for us. These scenes are for the general audience. These scenes are walking the general audience through the tonal and emotional shift in their relationship. They are very romantic coded. The dialogue, the music, the acting choices from both Oliver and Ryan. This is the show's way of making sure the audience as a whole understands and recognizes that their dynamic is changing. The audience is getting to witness the shift for both of them in real time. I desperately need people to understand how fucking good that is. We are getting to watch both men realize what's happening between them in real time and on an individual level. It's their love story! One episode at a time!!What they're doing is glorious and genuinely beautiful. Please don't take this for granted because this doesn't happen often. If you're not capable of following the story as it's told, which includes a week between episodes, and other storylines getting focus as well, then wait for the season to finish and binge the season at that point. But I am begging you all to learn how to watch a television show the way they were intended to be watched. Because that's what's happening here. We're getting ANTICIPATION!!! And LONGING!!! And I'm vibrating out of my skin! 🩷

Thank you Nonny!

Yeah, I agree with Ali on the Buddie of it all. We know where this is going, so let's just enjoy the ride. You know?

Seems I'm the only one who liked how they handled those last 5 minutes of the episode. I think it was a really clever way to go about things in order to make some time for the final Buddie goodbye scene.

I already said what I wanted to say about T and the Ryan stuff. I don't wish to talk about it anymore for today. I just want to enjoy my Buddie high for the remainder of this day. 😋

IMPORTANT! Please don't repost this ask and/or a link that leads straight to my Tumblr account on Twitter or any other social media. Thank you!

Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.

Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

[yoroshiu]

Sora: "That Dull, Ordinary Boy"

3 AM thoughts led me down to thinking about the ongoing and consistent mention of Sora being an ordinary person. In the couple of years I've been invested in KH, I think I've seen every possible opinion on this and have developed my own thoughts on it.

For me, Sora is ordinary. From a perspective of typical narrative roles characters can be, he's a supporting character turned protagonist. But the way the series goes about this aspect of him is fascinating and I haven't really seen it done in other media, at least not in this very specific way.

If you're interested in this post then know it'll be another long one, thank you in advance ^o^

(WARNING: This might be the most incoherent essay I've written yet since I'm not sure if I'm getting my thoughts across clearly. I'm just saying the obvious ngl...)

As said, Sora's a support character turned protagonist, which is something that can be agreed on by most of the community.

Within the Destiny Trio, he's the most normal one. Riku was the original chosen one, a figure that had Keyblade wielders like Terra notice his strong light and was actively chosen to go through the Bequeathing ceremony. He's also the one with the ambition and determination to leave Destiny Islands and as a young Sora mentions, Riku apparently says all sorts of weird stuff (difficult things in JPN). By KH1, he's the boy that's not like the other kids *hair flip* with the way he's able to beat the others on his own while they try to team up on him. Overall, as he goes through his arc, we see how main character he is. The way he devotes himself to protecting those he holds dear. The way he struggles with his darkness (his trauma). The protagonist energy Riku radiates is immense and he'd fit right in with Final Fantasy's lineup.

Kairi is a Princess of Heart. She came from another world, has a mysterious past that hasn't been dealt with fully, powers that are exclusive to her Princess of Heart attribute. Though a supporting character, her background alone scream special. She was led (fated in a way) to end up on Destiny Islands where a strong light was so she could be kept safe (Aqua's little spell + Terra-Nort's work). She's on an arc to become stronger and more confident in herself.

Then there's Sora. He's an outgoing and friendly boy-next-door. He's like a typical shounen anime protagonist on the most basic level but also has that comedic supportive side character energy to him. It's interesting how he notably doesn't have Riku's fascination with leaving their world and exploring. He's going along with it since Riku is (he was always following after Riku's step), and while he is curious, it's more from a childish wonder rather than the profound obsession Riku has. One of the earliest things we see of Sora's character is with the way he shirks his duties in helping build the raft. You can even see parts of it with the way he's indecisive about where to go and what to do in KH3.

(Funny trivia, Sora and Riku's JPN voice actor, Miyu Irino and Mamoru Miyano respectively, said that if the Destiny Trio were able to go on an adventure together, Riku would be the one making the decisions while Sora would just go along with him (KH3 Ultimania Interview))

If you look at the traits that make Sora the "Child of Destiny", they aren't exclusive to him (I also have a note on the whole way the Book of Prophesy works in the KH universe later). And if you look at the events that happen to him, more often than not, they're in tandem with the "special ones". Him saving Ventus back as a newborn heart is arguably not an exclusive ability. We see it in different ways and forms throughout the series, though not done with the to fix another's heart (Xehanort and Hoder, Eraqus and Terra), it's just that Sora's circumstances are a really weird exception. It's not an average Tuesday for someone's heart shattering and needing to connect with another to heal. I'd imagine that other characters have the capability of doing so.

What I'm trying to get at is that, Sora's not special by means of some exclusive ability. It's beacause of who he is, and more, who he chooses to be.

Now that isn't some big revelation. I'm pretty sure many people of are that opinion so it's like, "duh, you're writing this to say something that obvious?" and no, not entirely LOL

Sora has the Empathy but that's something that's shared with Xehanort and Baldr (and look at where that got them). Sora got the ability to wield a keyblade because it passed from Riku to Sora in a "going down the list" way, but Sora, by his strength of character (which also isn't exclusive by any means), proved himself worthy. Sora came back from becoming a heartless because of Kairi. Roxas is a special Nobody because of the manipulations of the Organization and Ventus being there (dual-wielding becomes a skill because of Ventus). He managed to escape being overtaken by Darkness because of his friends, especially Riku.

(I'll probably make a post about this later but funny of KH to present a narrative of "empathy" being a trait that brings the downfall of multiple characters. And funny that Sora also has this trait.)

The "exceptions" (in the case of KH's universe's laws) that he's involved with are due to his connections or his personality being in the "right place at the right time".

And that's where the interesting part comes in.

Sora, despite becoming the protagonist, has those shadows of "not being The One" follow him throughout the series. He's the easier one to control between him and Riku. He's the one that's the second or even third one down the list (The idea that Organization XIII needs Sora, but the power he's managed to acquire through scuffed means). Despite arguably being one of the most worthy of being a Keyblade wielder with the way he proved himself, Sora (doesn't seem to think of himself that way.

And if you take his conversation with Xigbar at the beginning of KH3 (especially in the Japanese context, you can see my translation post for that scene), he's considered to be one of those "ordinary people" compared to someone like Hercules who is a "special existence".

Sora is not "special" enough to escape from breaking nature taboos without consequence. He had to go through a timed and tedious process to do this. He can't get away with "saving everyone" and "getting a pure happy ending for himself" when he bends and breaks the universe's rules. The universe will simply erase him.

And the consequence of having those connections, the thing that he says is his power, is that they will suffer from losing him and trying to get him back. Xigbar argues that ordinary people, aka Sora, cannot self-sacrifice without cost. Those "special" connections can maybe get him out of it, but what does that really mean in the end. I think KH4 and onward will explore that.

On the topic of the Book of Prophecies, I always see points being made about Sora and how he's affected by it in a narrative role sense. I've seen people make arguments about Sora's specialness with this. But when you think about the circumstances in which it was written, MoM wrote the book while picking and choosing the events that would help him. His whole thing is about manipulating events and people to work in his favor for his greater good. I think it was his intent for future wielders (Scala ad Caelum especially) to grap those words tightly and push his plans along. Whether they tried to defy or go along with it, it would work in MoM's favor in the end. From what we know as of now, prophecies in this case aren't some "divine intervention" it's a guy actively writing things to get what he wants.

I must say that I'm aware of the wider span of the meaning of a "protagonist". There's no single way an archetype for a protagonist is written. I wrote this post with the typical heroic protagonist from a fairytale in mind. There's a lot of different interpretations of his moments and interactions (Like, why was he the one having those weird dreams in KH1's beginning). Sora was placed in very specific circumstances and just so happened to have the right heart and mentality to make the most of it. I mean, if he didn't, we wouldn't have much of a story to follow with him otherwise.

It's the way that Sora always has to work with what he has to press forward, not knowing everything, and oftentimes not getting happy endings devoid of some kind of tragedy or angst in the background (sometimes not even in the background). Not that stories are limited to "oh, the real protagonist gets a perfect happy ending" but in terms of the most typical standard fairytale story (which stands out more with the Disney connection).

It's the way that Sora being an ordinary boy is emphasized despite arguments otherwise. Nomura and other characters in the story itself insist that he is despite the special things he's done, and I think that's a fascinating part of KH's identity.

Sora's story is one of a normal boy being put in extreme circumstances. Not really by his own choice, but he moves forward out of the love he has for other people. However, while resilient, he isn't impervious and often bends and sometimes breaks. He is Kingdom Hearts's main character but he became one at a cost. There's an irony of sorts with having your actual protagonist be treated as a side character-turned-protagonist by the narrative. I find this interesting because we're actively exploring trauma this way.

Sora is special as people, as individuals, are inherently special.

Considering that he was made for players to be able to put themselves in his big ol' shoes, we are special because we are who we are. No superpowers, no connections to anyone "higher up", no book to dictate destiny.

Being the protagonist in our own lives is, obviously, no fairytale, but we can still do amazing things just by being ourselves.

Kinda cheesy, but I think that's neat.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Making Kingdom Hearts Stuff Until KH4 Comes Out (Day 65)

"Yoro, you just said the most obvious things, haven't people already talked about this before?!"

I know...I just have a lot of thoughts about having characters be impacted by narrative roles in quite a literal way ToT

He is, but isn't, but is the protagonist is a fun thing to explore. Actual protagonist but treated as if he wasn't meant to be one but he is one in his own story, type beat. Some of us tend to think of life as a story, and it's interesting hear people talk about "roles". No one's ever truly set in a narrative role, and that's also one of KH's notable themes. People breaking away from what they're told, expected, to be.

I'm sorry if none of this essay made sense or was connected well enough TvT

That's enough yapping from me LOL

[cosmereplay]

Eeee that's so cool! Thank you for the compliment and so glad you are reading the fics! And yes absolutely agreed new and aspiring fic writers need and deserve the encouragement 💕

And yeah absolutely nothing wrong with wanting more attention on Navani in fic!

Yeah in terms of this particular fandom I've found that there are way more people interested in writing original fiction than fanfic, and though those interests do overlap, the people who are only interested in original fiction tend to avoid the fanfic writers. The general cosmere fandom can often be dismissive and even hostile towards fanfic. (Whenever I post a fic I've written on the Stormlight_Archive subreddit it's a crapshoot whether I end up striking even or getting downvoted, and that's with getting friends to help boost the post!) 17th Shard has great mods but they have to be active to moderate discussions of fic sometimes. Maybe that's why I'm so protective of my fellow fic writers 🥹

Anyway, I really like the idea of including Rysn... Rushu might be a good addition too, and of course I'm always here for speculations about Navani's relationship with Renarin. I also wonder what her relationship with Aesudan was like! And does Navani have a ward? Idk idk

you're telling me that Stormlight, which is over 2 million words long, popular enough to have its own convention, recently finished, and has been releasing books since goddamn 2013, only has 1,907 works on ao3?!?

AND ONLY 247 OF THEM HAVE NAVANI?!?!

come on y'all, Brandon did nOT write two million words and then release all those free writing workshops for us to fumble this ball-- let's get this number up for our QUEEN! i made some navani prompts to get us started...take these, write em, weave em into ur larger fics, ill free beta read!

-Dalinar and Navani genuinely being made to talk about Gavilar.

-Navani giving Shallan advice on how to deal with Kholin boys™, and Shallan receiving the first safe parental figure she's ever had.

-Navani, ever-hesitant to bridge the gap between Dalinar and Adolin, because they're both so volatile at times and wounds can go deep...but just...really, really wanting to. And she doesn't like that it's something she can't fix, but deals.

-Navani being absolutely FASCINATED by Syl and Pattern as spren, especially in her pursuit of fabrial research.

-Navani trying to bond with Jasnah and slowly understanding her daughter's idiosyncrasies, and her place as a mother. Or Navani supporting Jasnah's reign in behind-the-scenes ways that Jasnah might never find out about.

-and of course, a 5+1 with the inevitable moment when she needs support and anyone in the goddamn cosmere she's ever been a great mom™ to is there for her

Write one-shots or weave plots into your larger fics or let them inspire you...and fuck it! add more! don't get intimidated! let your love for the story carry you and write it for navani :D

[dcbbw]

Fare Thee Well

Dearest Tumblrs,

 I believe the title of the post says it all; this is my goodbye letter to the site and the remaining people that have made the past 6 ½ years the most eclectic learning experience ever. It really shouldn’t be a shock or surprise given that I have already stepped away from Tumblr for indefinite periods before and am currently on hiatus; I’m just making it official.

But there’s a finality to this, a sadness over this chapter of my journey coming to a close.

 It's been quite the ride; like so many, I came to lurk and read about my chosen LI and all-time OTP. I never intended to write; while I have dabbled in creative writing off and on since I was a teenager and had a personal blog for therapeutic purposes from 2010-2014, I felt my writing style was too clunky/wordy, too repetitive, and downright boring because my voice didn’t sound like others.

 But one day, I decided to sit down and write something (my very first fanfic, Queen of Diamonds) I thought hadn’t been done before; I was so wrong. Fandoms are the literal embodiment of nothing new under the sun. I had no taglist, no idea how to tag my fic, and it received one note.

It didn’t matter. The joy and feeling of accomplishment from reading MY writing ON THE INTERNET is still the best high I’ve ever had (and I’m a recovering addict).  So I wrote another something (my first series, Timing, which is STILL incomplete), and that is when Tumblr stepped in to help me along. I was befriended and mentored by the most amazing writers (who are no longer on this site), which helped me to hone my craft and appreciate my voice.

My time here has been a journey:  I was schooled in fandom etiquette (I was greener than a can of peas); there has been discourse (nothing like a robust argument to bring a fandom together); I have been on both sides of the popularity line; I made both frenemies and nurtured friendships; and was gaslit (heavily) by Note Count Syndrome.

I have learned to agree to disagree, that 4 +5 isn’t the only way to get a sum total of 9, to stay open to learning, and to listen to another opinion/perspective with the objective of understanding, not rebutting.

While my reasons for finally cutting the cord with Tumblr are many, my #1 reason is  to further explore my writing, digging deeper into characters I have already molded in images far removed from what Pixelberry presented. Side note: Yes, I am taking my versions of the TRR gang (and a few from other stories) with me. PB doesn’t own names, countries (even fictional ones), or tropes. I do not plan to use their story verbatim (which is plagiarism and wrong), although there will still be a few fics with a Cordonian/royalty element to them.

I’ve written basically nothing but these characters for the past 6.5 years; I have custody of them now.

I’m looking forward to breathing life into original characters, creating worlds and situations that are both real and relatable on all levels. I can’t do that with fanfiction (especially fanfiction based on a romance trope), I can’t do that within a fandom where happily ever afters are mandatory and true love prevails no matter the plotline.

So yes, I plan to continue writing; if you’re interested in following the next steps in my journey to the Great American Novel, I am on WordPress. Right now, there isn’t much there but hopeful that will change soon. If you wish to connect with me on social media/messaging, I am really only active on Facebook, Signal, and WhatsApp. I’ll be leaving this post up for 24 hours to let the algos rithm and hopefully reach someone, so PM me for contact info.

Not tagging anyone because no idea who (if anybody) is left here.

In closing, THANK YOU, Tumblr. I couldn’t have done this without you.

[nerdyboiyeet]

Parallels I Noticed Between Leo and Prime!!

I've seen many people say that Big Mama is Leo's worst enemy/villain when they got upset with him being paired with one of the Sando brothers.

(Which, obviously she wasn't gonna pair herself with him, but shhhh, another time, Nerdy)

And I agree. . .sorta. She was his worst enemy/villain originally.

But here's what I see when it comes to that. Assigning someone a set villain or enemy typically means at least one of three things can be made; A foil, a connection/comparison, or a parallel.

Raph and Ghost bear? He's Raph's idol, they're both big characters, both rush in and fight, and both solve problems with punching (brawns over brain)

Donnie and Kendra? Both scientific geniuses with a love of purple, both clearly seek some kind of validation and both want their intentions to be seen (think about it- they could stop each other with a tiny robot/invisible device but they wanna be seen doing it instead of using logic :\)

Mikey and Meatsweats? Both love cooking, Meatsweats is Mikey's idol, and both of them are willing to do crazy things for cooking/keeping a kitchen

Now let's go onto the parallels!! May mental health issues ensue!! :)

Prime and Leo have waaaaay too much in common. In fact, it's kinda crazy how many similarities they have.

1- Both use strategy to keep their siblings safe without ever pointing it out

Leo knows what all his family is capable of and how to keep them out of trouble;

“Yeah, go home on a stretcher.”

“And you promised to stop eating our Halloween candy!”

“I knew we couldn't trust spider lady!”

“Hero moves are totally your style.”

And the list goes on and on. Point is- Leo knows his family and actively tries to keep them out of danger and trouble, and his family has no clue.

The same way Prime knows his siblings' capabilities and actively tries to keep them out of danger and trouble, and they definitely got no clue;

He keeps Three by his side nearly the entire length of the movie or close by

He never sends either Two or Three off to fight by themselves, in fact, the one time he has is after their super powerful ship has gotten through and his sister is in a powerful mech suit

It seems like he makes them retreat when they get injured; Two is brought back after her eye is screwed up, and he allows her to fight again only after she's got a giant army with her or her mech

He only let them fight in the first place after sealing off the boys Ninpō and fought them himself

In the bad timeline, you see this;

Look closely!! Two very distinct mech suits out there. Two and Three are out fighting while surrounded by other troops, beneath the Technodrome and victory is absolutely guaranteed.

(There's also a lot more of the three being evil/laughing together in scrapped story boards, but it's too early for me to go searching for them.)

It's something they both try to hide from them/keep under cover.

Cause if they find out? How much they care. . .

What would that mean then?

In Prime's case; A sign of weakness, a way to exploit him.

In Leo's case; What if they don't trust me? What if they expect more from me?

2- Both hide behind a mask of arrogance/ego

Now, it's a bit different for them.

Leo fakes most of his arrogance/ego. Don't get me wrong, he definitely thinks of himself as the most beautiful, but the majority of his bravado is false.

In Prime's case, the majority of his arrogance and ego is genuine, he truly believes he's the best. But when he's proven wrong- he desperately tries to hide behind his typical arrogance.

Leo hides behind witty remarks and deflection, no one sees him cry or be upset. (If I'm not wrong, I think one of the only times you ever see him genuinely cry is when he's alone in the prison dimension)

Prime hides behind rage and strength when he falls/is upset. (“YOU WRETCHED, LITTLE, PEST!” “WIPE THAT GRIN OFF YOUR FACE!”)

Both want to stop whatever has upset/reminds them of their failures ASAP.

Leo rushes in to try and get the key, save Raph, and stop the Kraang. He forgets any strategy in his panic and fear to fix his failure.

Prime rushes in with ruthless blows and sharp words. Desperate to crush the pest that ruined his plans, that caused his downfall, that he was too cocky to take seriously.

Both fail because they were too arrogant.

But here's the difference- Leo stops his arrogance which leads to him succeeding, Prime's so arrogant he fails. Which is where the foil between them comes through;

Prime lost because he was too cocky to stop the sword. You can not convince me that wasn't on purpose/to mock his sword throw.

Leo lost because he was too cocky (or at least trying to seem that way) to not rush in and try to get the key himself/to listen to his team

The foil between them stems from Leo learning and being willing to change, whereas Prime attempts to double down on things.

And now for a comparison that's gonna rock your world :,)

3- They react the EXACT same way when they get upset/have hit their limit.

Both of them freeze when they've realized they've messed up/something goes wrong/it all becomes too much

Look at that. Both just. . .froze. They both look a mix of horrified and stunned. Both just freeze to process everything, the fact that they both failed.

And when that freeze is over, they react the same way too;

That shock, that disbelief, that fear, that misery is promptly replaced by rage.

They both immediately lash out at whoever they believe caused that problem, or reminds them of it, despite BOTH knowing that they only have themselves to blame.

In Leo's case- He rushed in, but immediately goes after Casey (you can't convince me that if Donnie and Mikey weren't there that he wouldn't have hurt him in some way)

In Prime's case- He took them all as a joke/let his arrogance keep him from just defeating them (He toyed with them/mocked them/watched them fight the entire time instead of stepping in and taking it seriously)

They both freeze when things go wrong, and immediately switch to rage when it's been processed that they've failed/messed up.

Some more parallels, that I found interesting!!! ;)

1- Prime only locks away their powers after fighting Leo. He fought all of them at once, but only locked their powers away after fighting Leo specifically. He also seemed to be the only one he actively struggled with fighting

2- In discarded storyboards, Prime is missing a tentacle (it's definitely implied to be because of Leo) and future Leo is missing an arm

3- Both of them get the red glowy glow to their eyes;

I know that's more stylistic, but I thought it was cool.

All in all, they both have a lot of similarities to each other. They share their worst traits, yet also share their best ones; strategy, being cunning, smart, speed, etc.

Some real good angst opportunity then, on either side, just with the simple;

I'm just like him.

[bennie-jerry]

Look, I may not agree with all aspects of Catholicism, but the sexualization of nuns needs to stop.

You are actively sexualizing a group of women who dress the way they do BECAUSE they don't want to be sexualized. The sexy nun costumes are not only not cute, but deeply insulting.

Do y'all do this to women who wear hijabs?

You don't have to like the religion but that's no grounds to be straight up disrespectful.

"her body her choice" well these women are choosing their own way how to dress---stop mocking them.

[deathslbx]

yes 👏👏 beautifully said !!

i’m personally on the fence about whether i hope to see a bond between elriel or not. i don’t truly mind either way so long as elain’s choice and autonomy take the reigns, but i happen to know that plenty of elriel’s don’t want a bond for them. that the idea of ‘love trumping a mating bond’ is incredibly powerful as is, so i completely understand both sides. is there foreshadowing pointing to them having one anyway, a different kind of bond? sure, but even so, i doubt it would make or break this side of the fandom if they do so long as it’s done right.

people (antis) constantly bring up the fact that elain said she doesn’t want a mate or a male, that she will never end up with az who clearly only wants a mate blah blah blah, but one thing proven in canon, that we know for certain, is that elain does in fact want a male now, so who is to say that she no longer wants a mate? perhaps she, and i know this might be startling for some to consider, just doesn’t want the one that she didn’t choose. the one who was thrown at her (and vice versa). the one she felt betrayed her and her sisters, who she is uncomfortable around, who she shrinks away from…

when elain said those things about her love life she was clearly not yet over graysen, mourning that old human life that she had. she is not in that mindset anymore, at least not to the point that narrators are pointing it out like before. in fact it’s quite the opposite. she has found purpose now, joy, friends. has claimed that she is a part of the night court and will do what she needs to do. it doesn’t seem like she is still harboring hope that going back to how things were before is even a thought for her. could i be wrong? yes, we don’t have her POV. but there’s been a significant change in elain, and it’s not hard to understand who might have inspired that, or why.

and elain actively choosing that moment with az for herself? openly, with trust and hope in her eyes? no one knows just how deep her beliefs run now but it is in fact possible for her to change her mind. for her to choose what she wants and still hope for something greater. especially as she’s surrounded by that kind of bond and love constantly. can see the potential in it in a way she might not have been able to before. might not have wanted to until she started seeing azriel in a different light. until this male that she chose for herself made his interest known, too.

the potential for elriel’s book is out of this world whether they’re shown to be mates or not, but elain actively getting to choose that path for herself is what matters most to me. i know i’m not the only elriel who agrees with that.

(sorry for hijacking, i have so many thoughts about this !!)

There is such an interesting juxtaposition in these 3 episodes:

I don't want a mate. I don't want a male.

Elain shrunk into herself (losing her newfound boldness)

Elain's mouth parted slightly, her eyes scanning his before fluttering shut.  

Offer and permission.  

He nearly groaned with relief and need as he lowered his head toward hers.

As a human, Elain was able to choose Graysen as her lover and future husband. For a very short period of time, she enjoyed autonomy, authority and...choice. Something that she never had before.

Her becoming Fae automatically ripped that choice away from her. Not only that, but she was handed this Fae male (that she did not want) and a mate bond (that she did not want). All of her autonomy, all of her independence, and all of her choices were torn away.

She is looking at Nesta, she is looking at Feyre, she is looking at Cassian and at Rhys--she sees love and passion and desire. And she sees CHOICE in all of their relationships. Even with a bond, her sisters are pushed into it, her sisters aren't thrown in disarray and neither Rhys nor Cassian expect Feyre and Nesta to just accept and submit.

Which makes 'offer and permission that much more important.

From Elain's point of view, this is the first time in her Fae Life where she could finally make a choice AGAIN--she could choose a man, and she could offer herself to him, and it would be reciprocated.

I think for the first time since she was Made, she felt safe enough and confident enough to make that decision. Which only makes 'this was a mistake' so much more tragic. (and would hopefully lead to some delicious groveling!)

But it also shows that, in fact, Elain learned how to want a man again, a MALE. And maybe even a bond, with someone she wants and needs.