#I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVE TO GO BACK AND WATCH THIS AGAIN BECAUSE OF MY GOLDFISH MEMORY I'M GONNA BE SICK
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under the mistletoe
kim minji x reader ; fluff
synopsis: your ex is going to be at your cousin's christmas party so you convince your super cute gorgeous amazing stupid idotic hot best friend to play girlfriend for the night--it should be fine, right? it's not like anything real will happen... right? right??
warnings: fake dating but there's like no angst bc they're too gay to be doing all that (i can't write angst idk) ; making out!!! HOORAY!!!!! ; nerd minji my lover ; they're so gay ; kinda fast paced ; anything else not mentioned ; not proofread!!!
a/n: wanted to get winter themed fics out for all three before christmas but that prob won't happen LOL anyways this idea has been marinating in my head forever, enjoy!!! oh, and merry christmas!!
“i hate jake.”
minji looks away from her phone, one eyebrow raised as she watches you sink into the cushion even further. this is the third time you’ve groaned dramatically in the last five minutes.
“…jake is your cousin.” she points out, dryly.
“and the worst person on earth.” you mutter, setting your phone down beside you. minji watches you lean over until you flop against her with a very questionable posture. “he’s forcing me to go to his stupid christmas party.”
“and this is a problem because…?”
“because,” you huff, sitting up straight again. “my ex will be there. probably just to annoy me.”
minji immediately makes a face, scrunching her nose in disgust. “ugh, gross… didn’t she dump you for ‘personal growth’ and in that same month started dating a man?”
“i fear.” you reply, crossing your arms. “her egos so big that she probably thinks i’m miserable over her. i got over her the moment i found out she was with a man! she thinks im some stupid, emotionally immature—ugh.“
minji rolls her eyes. “i can’t believe you dated her—for four months.”
“not my brightest time.”
“it baffles me,” minji begins, “i hated her, you know?”
“oh, i know.” you glance at her, failing to hide a small smile despite your frustration. “you were not subtle about it.”
“well i wasn’t trying to be,” she says flatly, setting her phone down and looking at you properly. you peel yourself off her shoulder, moving yourself over to lay flat on your back your couch with one leg over minji’s lap. “so, what’s your plan? you can’t just go and let her get under your skin.”
you let out a long sigh, rubbing your hands over your face. “i don’t know. maybe i just… won’t go.”
“that’s an option,” minji starts, poking at the gingerbread man on your pajama pants mindlessly. “but jake will never shut up if you skip.”
“i know,” you groan, running your hands further up to grip at your hair out of frustration. “what do i even do? show up alone and let her pity me? she’s going to think i’m a loser—a bigger loser than the one she already makes up in her head.”
“you could just… not show up? make an excuse?”
“jake is pretentious—he’ll know i’m bluffing.”
“send him a fake screenshot of the thermometer showing that you have a high fever?”
“no, he’ll know.”
minji sighs, tilting her head as she studies you. “so what’s your plan then? cry in the corner? accidentally spill juice on her—or even worse—on yourself and hide in the bathroom?”
“you’re so mean to me.” you huff, sitting up and leaning against the opposite side of the couch now. you stare at minji for a bit, she’s looking at you with raised brows and a curious expression that makes you sit up straighter. “oh my god, i have a plan.”
minji immediately looks suspicious. “what kind of plan?”
“it involves you.”
“absolutely not.”
“i didn’t even say anything yet!” you kick her thigh, making her push your foot away. “just listen. you play my girlfriend for the night,” you say proudly, grinning at her like it’s the most obvious solution in the world.
minji blinks. “what?”
“we date—not for real—for the party.”
she stares at you for a moment, then bursts out laughing. “you’re kidding me.”
“i’m not! think about it—it’s perfect. she’ll see me with you, someone way better than her, then she’ll get off my back, and i won’t have to spend the whole night dodging her.”
minji shakes her head, though there’s a faint flush creeping up her neck. “and why would i agree to this?”
“because you love me?” you say skeptically, giving her a stupid pout and your best attempt at puppy dog eyes. “please, minji. you just have to stick with me and pretend to like me and plus–you’ll get free food and drinks. please?”
minji hesitates, poking at the gingerbread man on your pants again, the same one right over your shin. you tear your leg away from her, expecting an answer. “i don’t know…” she mumbles.
“i’ll treat you to dinner.” you add, which makes minji shoot her head up.
“dinner?”
“whatever you want.” you promise.
minji sighs, letting her head fall back against the couch. “fine. but only because i can’t stand her either—and i kind of feel bad for you.”
you barely let her finish the sentence before launching yourself at her, wrapping her in a tight hug with your arms around her shoulders. you’ve pushed her down a bit, she’s holding your weight, and her senses are overwhelmed from the scent of vanilla that clouds you and the warmth radiating off of your body.
“thank you!” you exclaim, your voice heavy with relief.
her hands hover awkwardly in the air for a moment before resting lightly on your back. “you’re welcome?”
it’s only then that you realize how close you are—your face inches from hers, your breath brushing against her lips. you can feel her tense beneath you, her gaze flicking from your eyes to your mouth and back again. her lips part ever so slightly, and the light press of her hand on your back falters.
the air shifts, something growing heavier on you two, but before you can dwell on it too long, minji gently pushes you off with a nervous laugh.
“y-you were crushing me,” she says, her cheeks tinged pink as she sits back, putting some space between you. “are you that happy that i agreed?”
“yes,” you grin, unable to stop the warmth spreading through your chest. “you’re the best, seriously.”
“yeah, yeah,” she mutters, reaching for a pillow and chucking it at your head. “just don’t get used to it.”
you groan when the pillow hits you, grabbing it from her hands and leaping over to get her back. you two fight each other playfully on the couch, you even knock minji’s glasses off her nose. and through the bickering, your heart skips a little when she’s trapped one of your legs between both of hers, and you’re trying to defend yourself while pushing her off—hyperaware of the proximity.
maybe playing girlfriend for a bit won’t be too bad.
-
after getting dumped months ago, the first person you turned to was minji.
she didn’t hesitate. the moment she saw your glossy eyes, she pulled you into her arms, holding you close until you calmed down. that night, she didn’t hold back her thoughts about your awful ex, and you stayed over, letting her cook you breakfast the next morning.
you’ve always been good friends, spent a good amount of time together, but somehow, after that night your friendship felt different—deeper—after that.
since then, you’ve found comfort in each other, always finding reasons to be together thrown in with superficial insults. sometimes it’s quiet—her sitting on your couch while you fold laundry and hum along to something playing on your phone, or maybe it’s you at her place while she studies. even when she hates chores, minji pitches in without complaint, and you never question why.
then there are the little outings: a walk in the park, dropping off a package, or now: grocery shopping. it’s nothing extravagant, but somehow it always feels like enough. it’s always enough with her.
you and minji are strolling through the grocery store side by side. minji holds a small basket in her hand while you grab and toss random items in with little thought. she’s squinting at a list on her phone, her lips moving slightly as she mutters the items under her breath.
“i was thinking,” you begin, and minji looks up, quirking a brow.
“oh god.”
“you’re so mean to me.” you flick her shoulder before continuing. “if we’re going to be girlfriends, we need a solid backstory. something believable.”
minji grabs a jar of almond butter and tosses it in the basket. “you’re overthinking this.”
“no, i’m not. what if someone asks us how we got together? we need a solid story,” you argue, “and i know jake is going to be interrogating me as soon as i introduce you—or at least curious, maybe.”
minji sighs. “fine. how about… we were hanging out, just the two of us, and suddenly we just fell in love or something. we confessed while watching a romance film, maybe?”
“wow,” you giggle, “that’s so original. super romantic.”
“it’s simple and probably believable,” she says defensively, nudging you with her finger.
“it’s corny.” you tease, turning and stepping into the next aisle. “how about this: we were at a concert and locked eyes and—”
“that’s even worse.” minji groans, covering her face with her hand.
“i didn’t even finish!”
“exactly. it sounds like hyein made that up.” she snickers, “i can’t believe she’s also your cousin.”
“one cousin that probably won’t make it to the party,” you sigh in relief, “she’d blow the whole plan, knowing how we are.”
“what?” minji questions, curious as to what ‘we are’ is. before she can ask, you cut her thoughts off.
“we’ll go with your idea i guess. but we also have to spend lots of time together, more than we usually do, and we kind of just have to make it believable.”
“that’s nothing.”
“well i can’t really trust you on that, minji. you’re not the brightest.”
you two continue to bicker and poke at this whole ‘fake dating’ ordeal. as you head out to the checkout line, loading your items onto the conveyor belt, an elderly lady in front of you turns around, her eyes twinkling as she smiles warmly.
“you two make such a lovely couple,” she says, her voice kind. “you compliment each other so well.”
both of you freeze for a moment, caught completely off guard. you glance at minji, whose ears have turned a noticeable shade of red, and you can’t help but grin.
“uh, thank you.” minji mumbles, suddenly very interested in organizing the groceries.
you don’t correct the woman, instead leaning slightly closer to minji and whispering, “see? it’s already working.”
minji rolls her eyes and shoves you lightly with her shoulder, unable to hide her flustered expression. it’s different than her usual, calm demeanor, and you like it. it’s cute.
you laugh, nudging her back. “you’re kind of cute when you’re like that.”
“what?” minji asks, a lump forming in her throat. “you’re so… you’re so annoying.”
—
countdown: two weeks until the party
you’re doing your best not to think about having to drive almost forty-minutes south for jake’s stupid party at his stupid (-ly nice) house. instead, you’re at your usual cafe spot with hanni, danielle, and minji. the conversation is casual, filling the air, along with the occasional hiss of the espresso machine.
you’re mid-rant, your hands gesturing animatedly as you lean forward. “i’m just saying, if you’re going to take a lit class, at least try to understand the material. this guy skims a few pages of virginia woolf and pretends he’s a ‘feminist.’ he’s doing the absolute most to appeal to women—half that class is gay!”
“which guy was this again? there’s too many men you hate on.” hanni asks playfully, sipping on her latte.
“heeseung. oh my god,” you huff, leaning back in your chair. “he’s so fake. he’ll throw out random quotes that barely connect to what we’re discussing, and the worst part? half the class buys it because he’s loud and confident. he doesn’t actually care about the themes or depth of anything. all heeseung does is show up to class, dress like some girls ‘dream man’ pinterest board, and plays pretend.”
danielle glances up with a small frown. “that’s frustrating. especially since you actually like the material.”
“exactly!” you say, stirring your straw around for no reason at all. “and don’t even get me started on how he turns every discussion into some weird way to hit on the girls in class. like, ‘oh, you’re so insightful. you must be really in touch with your emotions.’ oh my god i can’t stand straight men. i can’t stand people who enable them.”
minji chuckles quietly into her drink. the sound draws your attention, and for some reason, when your eyes meet hers, the air between you shifts. her gaze softens slightly, her lips quirking upward in a way that makes you stare a bit.
“he probably thinks he’s all that.” minji remarks, her voice steady but her gaze soft.
you falter for half a second, your rant losing steam. it’s not just the way she’s looking at you—it’s the way your chest tightens like someone tying a knot and tugging. it’s unexpected, and the way minji smiles down at her cup makes you feel all tingly inside. that’s odd. more than odd.
“yeah, exactly.” you quickly look away, ignoring whatever is making you do a double take. “he’s so one-dimensional, self-absorbed, and i hate him.”
minji bites back another smile, trying to keep her focus on her drink instead of the way you light up when you rant. she likes the way you talk, the furrow of your brows, the passion in your tone. she knows it’s a little dangerous, this quiet admiration she can’t seem to shake, the same admiration she pushed down your first semester. she’s gotten too good at keeping it to herself to lose now, and why now anyway?
hanni nudges you with her elbow. “at least he’s giving you plenty of material for complaints. maybe you could analyze him for an essay.”
you laugh, the sound warm and genuine.
minji’s stomach does a little flip—she wishes it wouldn’t.
“i’d seem like a fan,” you reply, shaking your head. “i’d rather focus on something—or someone—that actually matters.”
the words hang in the air for a second longer than intended, and your eyes dart back to minji’s. it’s fleeting, but there it is again—the strange flutter, like time paused just enough for something to stir.
minji looks away quickly, busying herself by looking out the window, and you clear your throat, turning your attention back to hanni and danielle.
the moment passes, but the undercurrent lingers. neither of you speak on it.
—
countdown: nine days until the party
minji’s apartment is chaos, but the adorable kind. her two-year-old nephew is currently standing on the couch, holding a stuffed dinosaur in one hand and a juice box in the other, refusing to eat the carrot sticks minji had cut up for him.
“you’ll like it if you just try it,” minji sighs, sitting in front of him. he’s sitting on the couch, towering over her because of the level difference. it’s almost comical.
he shakes his head, lying flat on his back and ignoring her.
you lean against the kitchen counter, biting back a grin as minji sighs dramatically and pinches the bridge of her nose. “you’re lucky you’re so cute,” she mutters, and you can’t help but giggle at the sight of her bickering with a child. she pinches his cheek and adds, “otherwise i’d be less lenient, you troublemaker.”
“he’s kind of like you. stubborn… and cute.” you tease, muttering the last part to yourself. you pull out your phone to snap a picture, minji whirling around a moment too late after you capture the scene.
“aw, i’ve got to make this my wallpaper.” you laugh, walking over and sitting down next to her.
minji rolls her eyes, shoving you lightly. “is this for our ‘fake dating’ thing?”
you hadn’t thought about that; in fact, you forgot about it for a brief moment. “oh,” you begin, looking at her with a strange confusion in your heart. “well, no. i thought it was a cute… candid moment.”
“whatever.” she grumbles, but her lips twitch into a reluctant smile as she returns to negotiating with her nephew. “but send me that, please.”
…
lunchtime comes with fewer arguments, mostly because minji bribes the toddler with nuggets. the three of you end up at a cozy cafe, not too far from the one you frequent with your friends. the kid is perched in a high chair between you and minji, eating happily.
minji is effortlessly charming, coaxing him to eat some of the carrots she brought with her and laughing at the attempts of sentences that he babbles. her eyes crinkle at the corners in a way that makes your heart feel a little too full.
you snap another picture when she’s not looking—minji leaning over to wipe ketchup off the kid’s cheek, her expression soft and so full of care it marks your chest ache.
“why are you smiling like an idiot?” she asks, catching you mid-photo.
“no reason,” you lie, slipping your phone into your pocket with a small, secret grin.
…
back at minji’s apartment, the liveliness dies down and reaches something still, something quieter. her nephew gets tired from the walking that occurred after lunch, so when you’re all back home he’s tucked under minji’s arm, clutching his dinosaur.
minji’s in a crewneck and grey sweatpants with two braids resting against the pillow her head is on, loose strands fraying out. she reaches over to drape the blanket over the two of them, and you watch from the door frame as you lean on it.
her eyes close from exhaustion, and that’s when you quietly grab the polaroid sitting on her shelf. it’s a spontaneous decision, but perfect for the moment. you turn it on, smile at the two, and press click. the flash catches you off guard, you’re afraid to wake them—but neither of them budge.
the photo prints out slowly, and once it’s fully spewed out you shake it in your hand so it can develop. it takes a moment to develop, but once it does, the smile on your face grows and stretches from ear to ear: minji’s face is relaxed, peaceful, and her nephew eunwoo is nestled against her with a similar expression. you slide the polaroid into the back of your phone case—just because.
as you turn to leave, minji stirs, her eyes fluttering open just enough to see you.
“stay,” she murmurs, her voice laced with sleep.
“minji,” you start, but she shifts a bit, making room for you while keeping eunwoo comfy. she pats an empty space beside her and grins tiredly.
“just for a little while,” she whispers, her eyes already closing again. “please?”
it’s the ‘please’ that does it. you hesitate only for a moment before stepping closer, your heart beating so loudly that if makes you wonder if she can hear it. climbing into the bed next to her, the mattress dips as you settle, minji instinctively drapes an arm over you, and it feels just right. the warmth of her so close is almost too much, but its perfect in a way you can’t bring yourself to think about twice.
you’ve always been fine with being touchy when it came to minji—lingering on the couch together, playful shoves, nudges, and maybe a limb or two resting on one another—but now? it’s much different. it’s easy to close your eyes and let yourself fall when she’s so close.
…
you wake up to the light outside fading, the room covered with the remnants of the sun shining through the window. minji is still beside you, her face turned toward yours, her breathing slow and even. her nephew is a small weight against her other side, pressed against her with the way her hand is angled and still clutching his dinosaur.
minji’s eyes flutter open just barely, and she looks at you like she’s still dreaming. there’s something unsaid in the way she gazes at you, something quiet and tender and a little overwhelming.
you don’t say anything, and neither does she. but the more the silence stretches on and with each slow blink she gives you while her lips form into another small smile—you realize you don’t want the moment to end.
she’s close, warm, and comfy—that’s minji. you realize it then as the sun continues to set, as your breaths are the only sound filling the room, and as minji absentmindedly strokes her thumb against your shoulder repeatedly that you wouldn’t mind being her real girlfriend. not if it meant being this close to her whenever you wanted and getting to love her on a different level.
the thought doesn’t scare you. it doesn’t feel rushed or strange or anything too overwhelming. it just is. the thought simply lingers in the air.
she shifts slightly, her arm moving over to rest on your back before pushing you closer to her. she lets out a content sigh as a full smile takes over. your heart flutters, and you smile back, just as soft.
eunwoo stirs, a little groan wakes both you and minji up a bit more. his voice breaks the moment as he mumbles something incoherent, and you see his little hand reaching over and squishing minji’s cheek in the process, even messing her braid up a bit more. you laugh at the sight and minji turns to him, brushing his hair back gently.
“time to wake up,” she murmurs lowly. “your mom might show up soon.”
the three of you wake up slowly, with minji being the first one to rub her eyes and sit up first. before she tends to her nephew, she glances at you with a strange new feeling in her eyes and it makes you think that maybe she feels the same way. maybe she wouldn’t mind if the agreement could stretch to new years and further. maybe she wouldn’t mind if it weren’t fake.
—
countdown: five days until the party.
minji stays near your side as you navigate the packed clothing store with her, hanni, and danielle. there’s a variety of t-shirts that you stop by so you can skim through, dresses that hanni and danielle consider buying for their sisters, and assortments of accessories that you all try on together, snapping pictures to add to your favorites folder.
“this is hideous,” you mutter, holding up a sweater that resembles a traffic cone but ten times more saturated.
“you should try it on,” minji insists with a smirk, already holding a ridiculous blazer with sequins lining it. “with this too. your ex won’t know what hit her, maybe the light will reflect off you and she’ll—”
“you think you’re so funny,” you narrow your eyes at her. “i can’t be the only one stealing the spotlight with my… hazardous outfit, can i? as my girlfriend you have to compliment me.” you grab the most outrageous pieces you can find—a neon, yellow turtleneck and pants that are somehow both plaid as they are glittery—then shove them into minji’s arms.
“so you want to play like that?” she grins, darting off to find something even worse.
hanni and danielle stand off to the side, watching the chaos unfold as you and minji start handing each other more and more ridiculous items for each other to try while giggling like middle schoolers. hanni’s shaking her head, her lips twitching into a smile. “they’re like an actual couple.”
“they really are.” danielle agrees, watching minji as she holds up a pair of fuzzy reindeer slippers and waves them at you like she’s found gold.
“you’re going to look amazing in these,” minji says, basically cackling.
“you’re going to look even better, babe,” you retort, putting a dramatically large hat on top of her head.
the entire store can probably hear you two laughing like idiots as you head into the dressing rooms, but neither of you care. and when you both step out, dressed head to toe in the most absurd clothing, hanni is the first to burst out laughing, immediately pulling her phone out and documenting everything. danielle hides her face behind her hands, trying not to laugh but failing miserably.
minji steps out and winks at you. she’s clad in an oversized t-shirt that says “elf of the year” and the glitter, plaid hybrid pants you handed to her. she looks like an absolute idiot, and you figure this might be the moment you really fall for her.
“you look so stupid.” you laugh at her with an amused look on your face.
“you know,” hanni says between giggles, “if you two show up to the party like this, you’ll definitely convince everyone you’re together.”
danielle nods, her cheeks pink from laughter. “you’re already convincing enough.”
minji glances at you, her smile softening just a little. “maybe we’re overthinking the outfits,” she teases, but there’s something in her eyes that lingers longer than it should.
you shake it off. “maybe.” you say, your tone playful as you walk back into the dressing room.
“you’d still look good in that, though. you do now.” she replies, but her voice is quieter, as if she only wanted you to hear it.
instead of letting yourself get flustered, you roll your eyes and step inside the changing room, looking in the mirror to see a faint blush on your cheeks.
—
countdown: <24 hours
you’re curled up on the couch with minji since both of you have been much more comfortable with being this close. a movie plays in the background, her arm is wrapped around you, and a blanket covers your legs that tangle together. the movie is something light and easy—your pick, though you can’t seem to focus on the plot.
minji feels your leg tapping up and down subtly against her, notices your tongue poking at your cheek, and the way your fingers fidget with one another. she’s aware of everything, of course she is. she’s sitting close enough that you feel her shift toward you, her presence grounding but not enough to fully settle your nerves.
“you’re doing that thing again.” she says.
“what thing?” you mumble, avoiding her gaze.
“the thing where you’re silently spiraling, fidgeting, freaking out—the latter.” she says simply, turning to look at you. “what’s on your mind?”
you sigh, pausing the tap of your leg and fidgeting and everything else. you run a hand through your hair before letting your upper body go limp against the cushion of your couch and minji’s forearm. “the party… i feel like it’s going to go bad or something. my ex, she’s… she’s so unbearable and extra! she’s only invited because she’s friends with jake’s girlfriend and ugh i don’t even know if this whole plan is going to work out because she knows you and—”
“hey,” minji cuts you off gently, and before you can protest, she reaches out and places her hand on yours. her touch is warm, her thumbs brushing over your knuckles before she boldly moves her hand over to your face now, cupping your cheek. “it’ll be fine,” she assures, and her voice is so steady that you almost believe her.
you blink, your breath catches, then shivers when you breathe out as best as you can. she’s looking at you with her pretty brown eyes through the frames that make her look like a huge nerd while simultaneously the cutest person as well and—
“minji…” you start, her name leaving your lips before your brain can process it. your stomach is doing something stupid and fluttery, the tension crackles between you like wood in a fire, keeping you two in place, pulling you closer.
you flinch at the sound of the abrupt buzz of your phone beside you. it snaps the moment in two, making you glance away from her as reality takes over again. she pulls her hand back slowly, resting them back on your hand instead.
she leans back and lightly mumbles, “you should get that,” her voice quieter than before.
you reach for your phone, your chest tight and your mind racing as you answer it.
it’s jake. of course it’s jake. his voice on the other end barely registers, something about ‘you’re coming, right?’ and ‘don’t bail on me!” followed by a stupid chuckle. your thoughts are still stuck on minji, and you’re wondering if the tension in the air weighed her down just as it did to you.
the call drags on, you glance at her from the corner of your eye. she’s staring at the screen, pretending to be absorbed in the movie, but her fingers fidget with the blanket. you can tell she’s just as thrown off as you are.
when you finally hang up, placing your phone back down beside you, minji looks over with a brow raised.
“jake,” you answer, even if she never asked anything. “he’s… yeah. just checking up on me.”
“right.” minji purses her lips.
you two sit awkwardly far from each other as the movie continues on, but eventually, you can’t take it anymore and return to your normal position. this time, your head rests on her shoulder comfortably, and your hands are intertwined. minji rubs her thumb against the back of your palm, and you think you could stay like this for hours.
–
countdown: finished!
minji parks the car and you take a deep breath in.
“relax, babe.” minji’s attempt at lightening the mood makes you smile softly. “we got this.”
“you sure?”
minji rolls her eyes, then takes your hand in hers as she does a rundown on your ‘relationship.’
“we’ve been friends for a while, i fell first but you’re the one who confessed first while we watched a romance movie—”
you cut her off, “and?”
“and after that we’ve been glued together by the hip. i know your likes and dislikes by default, um, our first date was… by the river? bike rides…?”
“you don’t sound certain.” you tease, “but you’re right.”
“whatever. and that’s it. everything else is just… our um, friendship.” minji’s voice dies down a bit when she says ‘friendship,’ the word articulates as if it were bitter on her tongue. “now let’s go.”
you and minji are side by side, her shoulder brushing against yours as you step through the door. music and scattered conversation are heard throughout the house, and you instinctively stick close to her. jake is the first to greet you, his grin wide as he pulls you into a quick hug.
“you made it!” he beams, then his eyes dart to minji. “and this is…?”
“this is minji,” you introduce, your tone casual while your thumb begins to scratch at your skin.
“minji,” jake repeats, a teasing edge creeping into his voice. “didn’t know you were dating anyone… you know she’s here— well, never mind that. guess we need some more time to catch up, huh?”
minji laughs softly, her hand lightly grazing your arm. “it’s a recent thing, few months.” she says firmly.
“yeah, kind of a surprise for us too. it happened out of nowhere, but i’m really happy.” you add with a shrug, trying to ignore the heat spreading up your neck. jake raises an eyebrow but doesn’t push further, to your surprise, and waves you both inside before giving minji a friendly side hug.
the party is more crowded than you expected, a mix of familiar faces and strangers scattered throughout the house. it’s not really a family gathering, not with the way jake’s friends have taken over the kitchen and living room. he’s always had a thing with turning events, even familial, social.
you and minji linger close, navigating through the small groups with an ease that surprises even you. every so often, while you’re greeting some mutual friends, you catch her glancing at you, a smile tugging at her lips and something in her eyes that you can’t decipher.
“when you said your cousin was inviting you to a holiday party… i expected it to be very formal and family-like.” minji murmurs as the two of you settle on the couch in the living room, plates of food balanced on your laps.
“he invites the cousins that are older and are on good terms with him.” you reply, rolling your eyes fondly. “he likes things like this. but hey, he’s fun, and he knows how to grill.”
minji laughs, nudging your leg lightly with hers. the sound is soft and warm, cutting through the background noise and settling somewhere deep in your heart.
as the two of you eat, you find yourself leaning into her presence without thinking. her knee bumps against yours and neither of you moves away.
“i’ll grab us some more soda,” you say after a while, setting your empty plate on the table and standing.
“don’t get lost,” she teases, her smile lingering as you head toward the kitchen.
you glance back once, catching the way she watches you leave. it’s subtle, but it’s enough to make you feel like she really adores you.
…
cold air hits your face as you dig past cans of beer and bottles of wine while you shuffle through the fridge. you finally spot the sodas in the back and grab two coke zero’s, but the condensation already makes your hands feel slick and damp. as you shut the door, you hear someone clear their throat.
turning, you come face to face with her. it’s like being hit with a wave you didn’t see coming, but at the same time you were preparing for it. now that it hits you, it’s really chilling. her hair is a little different, her smile just as sharp, and she seems as pretentious as before. you’re surprisingly able to stay calm.
“hey,” you greet sweetly, forcing a casualness into your voice that you don’t feel.
she tilts her head, a little smirk forming. “hey, it’s been a while.”
“it has,” you reply, gripping the sodas just a little tighter.
before the conversation can turn into something messier, a guy steps up beside her. tall, charming, and really just a face that resembles all the guys that she would compliment while you two were dating. “this is yeonjun, my boyfriend.” she says, her words are slow and deliberate like shes shoved a nail into your skin and twisted it.
you smile tightly, nodding at him. “nice to meet you, i’m an old friend of hers.”
the air is heavy, and you can tell she’s waiting for you to falter. your hands are damp now, the condensation dripping from the cokes, and you’re wondering how to get out of this.
someone answers your prayers. a warm hand settles on your waist, grounding you instantly when the familiar warmth is recognized. then, soft lips press to your temple. your heart stutters in surprise and your brain malfunctions momentarily. you turn your head slightly, catching the familiar scent of minji’s floral perfume before you can even see her.
“hey, love,” love? that’s a new one, but you can’t say that you hate it—especially when it comes out so naturally from minji.
she reaches over to take one of the sodas from your hand and when you glance back over to your ex—it looks like someone just slapped her. “minji?”
minji smiles politely, her hand still resting at your waist, tugging at your waistband not so subtly. “yeah, nice to see you again. i was wondering what was taking y/n so long, i was getting thirsty.” she gives you a soft glance as she chuckles.
you manage to recover quickly, leaning into her touch. her presence fuels your words, “i was just catching up,” you explain, gesturing toward your ex. “oh, right—you remember minji, don’t you?” you pause for just the right amount of time before looking at her lovingly, adding, “she’s my girlfriend now.”
your ex blinks, surprise evident in her expression. “oh. wow. i didn’t know… you two were—”
“yeah,” you interrupt, turning toward minji with a grin you don’t have to fake. you can’t remember the last time you faked anything with her, really. “she’s amazing. i’m glad we’re together, she’s lovely.”
minji rolls her eyes before moving her hand up to your shoulder, rubbing it lightly. “you’re doing that thing again.”
“what?” you question.
“being so fond,” she twirls a piece of your hair with her finger, “you’re too sweet to me.”
“because you’re my girlfriend, idiot.” you giggle right after that, and minji follows. “i’m not lying when i say all those things.”
minji smiles at you, something mellow and real in her eyes. you can tell she knows exactly what you’re thinking. her hand moves over to cup your cheek briefly before she uses it to open her can of soda. she glances back up at the pair in front of you, your ex and yeonjun, giving them an intimidating glare—directly mainly to your ex.
“we should get back, jake was asking about you.”
“was he? i guess we should…” you say, glancing at your ex one last time, her expression unreadable now. “it was nice seeing you again.”
minji steers you away, her presence steady and comforting as she leads you with her hand returning to your waist. you don’t miss the way your ex’s gaze lingers on the two of you, but that doesn’t cross your mind anymore. not when minji’s here, leaving you flustered and happier than you’ve ever been.
—
the living room is filled with laughter and conversation when you and minji step back inside. your cheeks are still warm from the cold air outside—or maybe from the conversation you just had, both of you had been reminiscing on how harsh minjis nephew eunwoo can be towards minji. her laugh lingers in your mind, and for a moment you almost forget where you are.
“there you two are!” jake’s voice cuts through the noise, and everyone turns toward you and minji as he gestures for you to join the group. “you’re just in time!”
but then you notice it—the small branch of green hanging above your heads: the mistletoe.
jake grins, wide and mischievous as if this were part of his plan. “looks like you two are under the mistletoe~” jake points out as if he’s a child.
the room quiets, and suddenly, every pair of eyes is on you and minji. your shoulders stiffen and minji’s hand brushes against yours.
you glance at her, and she’s already looking at you, her face flushed but calm. you’d stare for a moment longer, maybe tease her for how cute she looks, but you’re in the spotlight now. there’s something steady in her eyes, like she’s silently saying, it’s okay.
someone whistles, and the teasing murmers start, but they fade into the background when minji tilts her head slightly toward you, her voice low and gentle. “we don’t have to if you don’t want to.”
you shake your head, a small smile forming. “it’s fine,” you whisper back, “it’s just a kiss, right?”
she nods, her expression mirroring yours—reassuring, gentle, and maybe just a little nervous.
and then, without overthinking it, you both lean in. the kiss isn’t hurried or awkward—it’s soft and lingering, not too much but far from a quick peck. your hand brushes against her neck, and for a moment, everything kind of blurs except her.
when you pull back, the room erupts into cheers and coos of “aww,” but you barely hear them. your eyes are still locked on minji’s, her cheeks a shade of pink that you will definitely comment on later.
before you can process anything, her hand comes up to cup your cheek, her thumb brushing against your skin. she leans in again, this time pressing a brief, tender kiss to your lips. it’s a kiss that’s not influenced by the branch above you, a natural, instinctive kiss that makes your heart stop beating for a bit.
you both pull away, a silent realization settling between you. something’s changed. something you can’t quite name but can sense in her dilated pupils, slight bite of her lip, and bright smile.
“okay, okay, lovebirds. sorry about my cousin and her girlfriend,” jake jokes with a laugh, breaking the moment and taking all the attention off you two. “i just wanted to thank you all for coming.”
his words don’t process, in fact, you don’t really hear much of it because minji’s fingesr slip between yours, warm and steady. as jake continues talking, you glance down at your joined hands and then back at her.
you squeeze her hands lightly. the feeling is new, but it feels like it’s always been there. it feels good, it feels right.
…
once jake’s speech ends, you catch minji’s eye. there’s longing in her look, she’s asking a silent question and you have the answer. without a word, you grab her hand, weaving through the guests and slipping up the stairs unnoticed—they don’t know your cousin’s hosue like you do.
the hallway is dim, shadows playing on the walls as you pull her to a stop. before she can say anything, you turn, your hands finding her cheeks, and kiss her.
it’s different this time—no crowd and no stupid mistletoe hanging above. it’s just you two. you, and minji, with her lips are pressing against yours softly. she tastes sweet, warm, and familiar, and the way her hands rest under your jawline sends a shiver down your spine.
you pull her closer, hands moving down and pulling at the fabric of her shirt like you’re trying to stop yourself from losing your balance. her lips move against yours in harmony, in sync, and nothing else in the world matters except the two of you in that moment.
when you two finally break apart, you’re both breathing heavily—from kissing so much and from utter shock. minji’s eyes search for yours in the darkness, her lips parting slightly as she catches her breath. “come on,” she murmurs, tugging your hand gently.
she pulls you into a nearby room, and you barely manage to glance around before realizing who’s room it is.
“minji,” you whisper, stifling a laugh, “this is jake’s room.”
“i could care less,” she cuts you off with another kiss. her lips are insistent, and her hands find your waist again, drawing you closer. “when i kiss you, i just— i can’t help but want to kiss you more and more and more and more.”
her confession is punctuated by kisses–soft, desperate, and consuming. you melt into her, your hands threading through her hair as you let her guide you toward the bed.
she’s nearly on top of you, her legs on either side of yours with he lips trailing to your jaw, then back to your lips.
“i want to be your real girlfriend,” she whispers nervously. “i want to kiss you like this, be with you, everything.”
you pause, cupping her face in your hands as you pull back just enough to meet her eyes. she looks at you, eyes lidded and vulnerable. your heart swells.
“i want to be your real girlfriend too,” you confess, using your thumb to stroke her cheekbone. “i think this is the best present i’ll ever get.”
she giggles before closing the distance again—instant, radiant, eager— and you can feel her smiling against your lips.
“should i put a bow on myself and lay under the tree?” she says when she pulls back, but just enough so your lips ghost each other. “to seal the deal.”
“you’re impossible.” you laugh, digging your fingers deeper into her scalp before pecking her quickly. “we should take this to the car… jake will kill me.”
“i think we can settle for a few more kisses.”
“is there a mistletoe constantly hovering over you?”
“no…” minji mutters, “but maybe we could steal the mistletoe and make it happen.”
you roll your eyes at her, but regardless you close the distance once more. and just when you think she can’t be more of an idiot—she proves you wrong.
“and you still owe me dinner, by the way.”
“whatever,” you mumble in adoration, “it’s a date.”
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Im laughing so much rn. Somehow the starscram blokee came in first when it shipped way after megatron and shockwave. Did this boy really speedrun the mail system? 😭
Can't wait to put him together (on my tree)
Nice! I think TC and Skywarp are supposed to arrive today while I’m at work. I almost regret telling y’all about the figures, cause the price for singles on EBay went from about $13 each to $24 or more now. 🥲 JK- buy the Blokees so they release more characters
Even If It Kills Me Pt 9
Armada Starscream x Reader
• Servos cupping over you as kick out a leg, twisting in his grip to make Runway lift his head with a tired warble. How many times does this make this week alone? When you’ve struggled, fighting against a dream. Or a nightmare and he has no idea how to fix it. How to help, but those small sounds of pain go straight to his spark, make him remember his own tormentor. Because that must be what’s haunting you. Even if it’s over and you’re safe now, the fear is still there, probably always will be. Venting tiredly, he strokes a servo against your spine. Aware of his mini-cons all watching now, upset that you’re upset. And optics shuttering, he begins murmuring at you. Singing in his gruff voice an old Seeker lullaby about bright, endless skies.
• Curling into yourself as you startle awake, you’re aware of a low humming, of guttural, strange sounds and intonations. He’s singing. Afraid to move in case he stops, you relax and listen to him, hearing an aching longing there even though you can’t understand the words. That ache calls to you and you remember the way he’d looked at you when he’d sat on the floor with you and the mini-cons. Like he’d wanted something. Wondering now if he’d wanted you to join him. Sit with him and share a meal. Realizing, you want that even if you know better. Know that hoping for a place to belong can only hurt you.
• Singing faltering when you shift on top of him and he allows you to sit up, he looks down at you. “Please,” you say, those haunted eyes making his spark ache unexpectedly. “Please, don’t stop.” Watching you reach up and scrub at your eyes, he presses the tips of his servos against your spine, feeling the beat of your heart. And even though he knows his voice isn’t meant for this, isn’t soft and soothing, he sings for you and feels you twist slightly to curl yourself against his palm. So softly, he nearly misses it, you hum along to a song you can’t understand, your little voice lifting and becoming haunting. The song becoming about loss and hope, your voices twining together.
• When the song fades, he reaches up to touch your cheek, those big hands so gentle. “You should rest. I have you,” he says, tone gentle despite how gruff his voice is. And you want to believe him. Want to hope this can last, that you’re safe. That you won’t somehow ruin this, even if you don’t deserve to have this. Standing and slowly picking your way over his chassis, aware of his servos hovering to catch you if you stumble, he frowns at you. Laying a palm on his chin, you lean against his face to press a kiss against his cheek. See his optics widen slightly as though shocked that you’d done that.
• “You’re a sweetheart,” you say, smiling at him even though your expression is still so sad. Spark warming, he watches you make your way back to his chassis and lay down again. Draping his servos over you, he lays there listening until your breathing evens out before reaching up to touch his face where your soft mouth had brushed against him. Venting softly, he stares at the ceiling and thinks about broken things. If they can ever really be fixed or if those broken edges will always remain. If you’re both too broken to even begin trying to fix each other.
Previous
But I’m too tired to go to sleep tonight
And I’m too weak to follow dreams tonight
For the first time in a long time I can say
That I want to try to get better and
Overcome each moment
In my own way
I’m not saying that I’m giving up
I’m just trying not to think as much as I used to
Cause "never" is a lonely little messed up word
Maybe I’ll get it right some day
For the first time in a long time I can say
That I want to try
I feel helpless for the most part
But I’m learning to open my eyes
And the sad truth of the matter is
I’ll never get over it
But I’m gonna try
To get better and overcome each moment
In my own way
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loml
pairing: natasha romanoff x reader
words: ~3.3k
warnings: angst, happy ending (?), literally just self-indulgent writing, messy writing, listen to loml by taylor swift to get in the sad mood
a/n: merry christmas everyone! the last thing I posted was january of 2022 and it's literally about to be 2025 - I've been in a reminiscing mood lately and this was something I've had in the drafts for months, I figured I should just release it to get it out of my system. your girl has been missing someone bad bro and the urge to tag them in this is insane ♡ anyways, hope they see this lmao
“Have a safe flight and text me when you land, yeah?”
“I will, I will. Get home safe and update me as well, okay?”
You release your cousin from your hold, giving their shoulder a quick squeeze as they pull away. You do a last minute check with them to make sure they hadn’t forgotten anything important - something you were always prone to do when travelling by yourself. The memory of you almost missing your international flight because you had rushed home and back to the airport within record speed, all because you had forgotten your passport of all things.
“I’ll fly out to see you next time, so you can show me around.” You smile.
“Are you guys serious? I told you to leave early so that this exact thing wouldn’t happen!”
Your eyebrows immediately furrow at the familiar voice, catching one last glance of your cousin as they enter the security screening area, waving to them while you mouth one last ‘text me when you land!’ as they leave your sight, before turning around to find the source of the voice.
No way it’s her, you thought. What’s she doing here?
As you get closer to the arrivals board, your questions are answered. Standing there in all her glory, is the one woman you never thought you’d lay your eyes on again.
“Natasha?”
You see the puzzled look on her face as she registers your voice before she even lays her eyes on you. Watching as the confusion turns to irritation - whether it was towards you or whoever was on the other side of the phone, you couldn’t tell (most likely both) - you watch as a deep sigh she releases as she glances at the board in front of her once again.
“-that’s another 10 hours before you guys even land.” She sighs, exasperation lacing her voice.
“Hey, listen if you need help-”
She holds a finger up to silence you, eyes meeting yours in a piercing glance. “I don’t need help, and especially not from you Y/N L/N.”
At her words, you look down, the sight of your shoes a welcome one as you take a second to recover. Honestly, you thought to yourself, I deserved that.
“Yes, it’s Y/N- no I did not! I swear I didn’t know that they were here.” You hear her mutter from beside you. Deciding to save the both of you from further embarrassment, you turn your attention elsewhere, wondering what your cousin would say once you eventually tell them about who you ran into immediately after they left.
You lift your head back up when you hear Natasha mumble "you guys pick the day before Christmas of all days to be late for your flight” followed by a quick goodbye before hanging up the phone, watching her scope the airport for her next step.
You could just leave and pretend this ever happened.
“Come on, Nat, I promise I just want to help.” You find yourself saying instead. “I can take you to your hotel when they get here.”
Well, there's no going back from that now.
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Are you seriously asking me that right now?”
You really needed to stop opening your mouth.
“Okay, you know what, I deserve that.” You pause. “Listen, I’m not going to force you to come with me, but the offer is still there if you want it. You’ll get a free ride, plus you can use my apartment to rest and freshen up while you wait.”
-x-
"I can't believe you talked me into this."
You spare a glance to Natasha, who was currently sitting in your passenger seat.
"You're the one that followed me to the car?"
She rolls her eyes at your confused tone, choosing to ignore what you said and instead checking her phone - most likely waiting for an update from whoever she was speaking to on the phone before. "I can't believe they missed their flight."
"Who's they?"
"Yelena, Maria, Wanda," she answers. "Oh, and Yelena's friend Kate too. I don't think you've met her."
You bit the inside of your cheek, because you already know that you didn't get to meet anyone named Kate while you were still together. You honestly didn't get to meet many of Natasha's friends whenever visited her - it was something you always fought over. It felt like she was ashamed of you, always wanting to keep you hidden, a secret she never planned on sharing with the world.
You refrain from asking any follow up questions - if Natasha wanted you to know more she would tell you.
Instead, you ask: "Did they manage to catch the next flight out?"
She nods. "I'm honestly surprised they did, considering how expensive it probably would've been. But knowing Maria, she probably would've pulled some strings to make it work."
Natasha finally looks up from her phone as you come to a stop, looking at the building you had just parked in front of.
"Where are we?"
"My apartment, I figured we could drop off your bags and you can freshen up before I show you around." You open the door for Natasha before moving to grab her bags from the trunk.
You lead her inside, setting her bags down in the living room before turning around to face Natasha - holding your arms out as you gesture to your living space. It's the first time she's ever stepped foot into this place, having only seen it through a phone screen since you were the one who would fly out to visit her when you were still together.
"I'll grab you some towels so you can freshen up, but make yourself at home." You say, gesturing for her to follow you down a hallway. "The bathroom is the first door to your left, there should be a spare toothbrush under the sink- wait did I give to my cousin? Well, we can grab you one while we're out but everything you need should be here."
You know you're rambling but you don't stop in fear of saying something stupid (which knowing you, is highly likely).
"If you want to take a nap, the guest room is just a little further down the hall on the right - I just changed the sheets so everything should be fresh."
It's not the way you wanted to be showing Natasha around your home for the first time, but you'll take what you can get. It'd be so easy to waltz back to the way things were, before everything fell apart but you didn't have the right to that anymore. You weren't a part of her life anymore.
You didn't know if she already had someone new in her life, maybe you were overstepping in so many ways and that it was best to just keep your distance. After all, you did promise that you just wanted to help. You were here to keep her company until the girls arrived and take her to the hotel when they finally did get here.
You know it's for the better to just move on, that after today she'll be gone and it'll be like she never made a reappearance in your life. But how could you when you know deep down that you still haven't fully moved on and that she'll always hold your heart in her hands?
Natasha's voice cuts off your reverie, bringing you back to the present as you hand her the towels.
"Give me an hour to shower and rest my feet for a bit, I wanna go out and explore while we wait."
-x-
"Do you see that one over there? That's a hammerhead shark! They're one of the most powerful sharks in the ocean."
Natasha hears the little girl gasp, watching their eyes going wide with wonder. She can't help the small laugh that escapes when she sees the young girl lean closer towards the glass before loudly whispering, "is it going to eat us?"
You laugh softly, and Natasha can't help but think that she's missed hearing the sound of your laugh, something she thought she wouldn’t hear again. It comforts her slightly to know that it hasn't changed after all these years, and that she can still easily recognise the sound as being yours only.
"It won't eat us! Sharks don't eat humans," she hears you explain. "They're more interested in fish and seals, than they are humans. But they are really strong swimmers, and they can smell things from miles away - even in water!"
She'd been watching you answer questions about sharks for the past 5 minutes, after a curious little girl ran up to while you were looking at the shark tank and asked if you knew what type of shark was swimming in front of the glass.
"Do sharks talk to each other?"
"They don't talk like we do, but they do communicate by using their bodies and how they move through the water. Some sharks even make sounds by rubbing their teeth together, kind of like a secret language that only they can hear."
It doesn't take long for the girl's mother to find the three of you, sighing in relief as she sees her daughter, looking up at you apologetically.
"Sorry, she's probably been asking you a million questions."
You give the woman a friendly smile and shake your head. "It was nothing, I loved answering all of her questions." You tell her. "It looks like you might have a future marine biologist on your hands."
"Let's leave the lovely ladies to enjoy the rest of their date, bubba."
"Oh- it's not-"
"We're not-"
The mother and daughter are already walking off before either of you could finish your sentences, leaving you and Natasha standing in front of the shark exhibit with red cheeks and thundering heartbeats.
Natasha catches your eyes as you glance at her in a shy glance, and she knows it's too late. The warmth that passes through her as you smile, the same warm and knowing smile that you used to give her when everything was still okay was almost enough to bring her down to her knees.
You interrupt before her thoughts can spiral any further, clearing your throat before gesturing with your head the direction of the next exhibit.
"Shall we keep going?"
-x-
Natasha sits across from you at a small café by the beach. You mention to her that it was your secret place, one that you go to when you wanted time to slow down and just have a moment to catch your breath. After the little incident at the aquarium, you guys decided it was best to just sit and people watch for the time being to avoid any more awkward interactions.
The warmth emanating from the cup of coffee did little to chase away the little chills that ran down her spine every time Natasha caught you gaze lingering on her for longer than you must've realised.
She told you about the plans that she and the girls had made for their vacation while you filled her in on your own life, telling her about your cousin that had just recently come to visit you just before Christmas.
"I'm glad you chose to come with me." You admit after a pause in conversation, voice soft. She turns to look at you, your eyes meeting hers with such an intensity it made her breath get caught in her throat. "I missed getting to talk to you like this."
She can tell that you spoke without thinking, the widening of your eyes giving you away. You look away, muttering a quiet "sorry" before lifting your drink to your lips in an attempt to hide the flush of your cheeks.
She was supposed to be over you. She'd told herself time and time again that she had moved on, but seeing you again, and being here with you, she couldn't deny that she was still in love with you. Having you so close yet so unreachable leaves an ache in her chest.
Throughout the time you two had been sat at the café, she watched you with fondness at the way your eyes lit up while you spoke with excitement in your voice about the things you and your cousin had gotten up to in the week they were with you; Natasha realises that she missed you too - and the comfort that you brought her just by simply being near.
"Nat? You okay?" The worry in your voice only deepens the ache in her heart.
"Yeah, no, sorry - I'm okay." She answers with a shaky nod, breathing deeply. She allows herself to feel her emotions, knowing that it would only do harm if she tried to deny herself this moment with you.
"I missed you too."
The sadness settles deep within her chest, the way you looked so shocked at her words - and she wonders if you were expecting her dismiss your words.
Her phone pings loudly from where it was placed on the table, the text tone sounding off four times in a row as her screen lights up between the two of you.
Natasha!! We've landed :D - Wanda
Sestra, we're on our way to the hotel now, tell lover girl to drop you off now - Yelena
Hi Nat, sorry again - we'll be there in 30 minutes! - Kate
I'll check us in if we make it to the hotel first, Nat, just let us know when you're there - Maria
You both watch as each text pops up on her phone, knowing that your time together was coming to an end.
Natasha watches as you ponder for a moment - wondering if you were going to add on to your words from before now that she's admitted that she missed you too. For a second it does seem like you're about to say something, but instead you just shake your head slightly to yourself, clearing your throat and as you look away, flagging down a waiter to pay for the meal you shared.
"We should probably get going if we want to get to the hotel at the same time as them."
She allows herself a moment to watch as you gather everything, absentmindedly listening to you talk about leaving now so we don't hit traffic - though I guess it's fair to make them wait, considering they made you wait like 10 hours, that's a practically a whole day wasted where you guys could've been sightseeing!
Natasha knows your putting on a brave front - she can see it in your eyes as you gather your wallet and keys, but she begrudgingly gets up after you pay for the bill, walking back with you to your car.
Already dreading the moment she has to say goodbye.
-x-
"Well, I guess this is where I leave you."
Pulling up at the front of the hotel, you catch a glance of Yelena, Kate and Wanda through the window. Even though you couldn't see her, you knew Maria wouldn't be too far away. Probably checking everyone in, you assumed as you parked your car near the entrance.
You do your best to avoid looking at Natasha, taking your time in getting out and grabbing her bags from the trunk, knowing this could very well be the last time you see her again. The thought alone breaks your heart all over again - you can recall all the times you've begged the universe to let your paths cross once more. Now that your wish has been granted and you're preparing to say goodbye to her once again, you deeply feel the loss of her from your life before it's even happened.
She's already watching you as you close the trunk. You hope that she can't see the tears that have been slowly building up since you started the drive to the hotel. You refuse to let yourself hope that the look in her eyes could mean anything order than gratitude.
"Thank you, Y/N, for today." She tells you softly.
"It's was nothing, Nat," you say with a smile, before softly adding, "you're welcome and I hope you guys have a Merry Christmas."
Getting lost in the silence that falls between you; you miss the way she's looking at you as you stare down at your shoes, waiting for her to grab her things and go so you can drive back to your apartment and sulk for the rest of the week. You wonder if she can see the way your hands are shaking as you wait for the inevitable goodbye.
"Y/N?"
You hum in response, not trusting your voice to stay steady if you decided to use actual words.
"I had a really good time today."
You tilt your head in curiosity. You've had a hard time all day trying to gauge if Natasha was having enjoying herself or not. There's no doubt in your mind that she would've said something if she wasn't.
"And it got me thinking," she continues. "I don't know- maybe I'm reading into everything wrong, and you can absolutely say no. You'll probably say no, because this is crazy, but I had to say something before I lose my mind-"
"Nat." You interrupt. As endearing as it was to hear her ramble on, to see her getting more and more flustered as she kept talking, you knew she'd work herself up before she every got to what she actually wanted to say.
"Breathe, love."
You nod encouragingly after she takes a deep breath, giving her time to gather her thoughts.
"Maybe it doesn't have to be so wrong, you know?" She starts. "To try again."
You try to hide the shock that you feel, but can't stop the way your eyes widen ever so slightly at her words. Never in a million years did you expect her to even say yes to spending the day with you, let alone suggest giving your relationship another go.
Does she mean just a friendship or an actual relationship?
Is she just saying that because of today?
What if she realises she doesn't actually mean that later on?
What if this was just a joke and she was just waiting for you to say yes so she can go "aha! I was just kidding as if I'd be serious."?
What if-
"We're different people now, don't you think?"
Confused but curious to know what else you had to say, she nods. "I'd say we are."
"We're older than we were before." You add. "We know a lot more about ourselves now, I'm not the scared kid I used to be."
You're scared of making the same mistakes you did all those years ago. But you also know that you're more than willing to learn from those mistakes; to stay and communicate to make things work instead of running away at the first sign of trouble. Because if there's anything you want more in the world, it's to make this work with her.
But just as much as you are scared, you can't help but be excited. Excited and honoured to learn more about this new Natasha, and fall in love with her all over again. You can't wait to find out what stayed the same, and what changed about her. Whatever she was willing to share with you, you'd gladly take.
"I could love you properly this time."
She gasps softly, and your heart pounds at the prospect of already scaring her away.
The thought of her friends seeing this happening through the window of the hotel briefly crosses your mind - you wonder if they'd approve of you making a return to Natasha's life or if they'll make you work for it after the way things ended between you two.
But she smiles, stepping into your personal space to wrap her arms around your neck and all thoughts leave your mind. The only thing you can focus on is Natasha pulling you closer so her words are only for your ears and your ears only to hear.
"I could love you properly this time too."
-----
@sadonism
#natasha romanoff x reader#black widow x reader#natasha x reader#black widow imagine#avengers x readers#marvel imagine#myfics.txt#i am going through it once again folks#this is probably gonna get shadow banned bc i haven't posted in so long but oh well
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TRK KANDREW QUOTES:
- "Andrew twisted and punched the wall hard enough to split the skin along his knuckles. Kevin took a quick step forward, hand out like he could stop Andrew from landing a second blow"
- "You shouldn't be outside if you're coming down with something," Kevin said. "Such concern." Andrew grinned at Kevin's cool tone. "Don't cry, Kevin. It's nothing a nap and some vitamin C can't fix."
- Kevin had a knee hugged to his chest and his face hidden in the fold of his arm. His knuckles were white where his hand was clenched into a fist. Neil didn't think it was the bus that was making Kevin shake like that. "Look at me," Andrew said. "It'll be fine. You believe me, yes?" "I believe you," Kevin said, muffled but noticeably strained.
- "Andrew has neither purpose nor ambition," Kevin said. "I was the first person who ever looked at Andrew and told him he was worth something. When he comes off these drugs and has nothing else to hold him up I will give him something to build his life around." (my fav quote)
- Kevin had eyes only for Andrew as he crouched in front of the downed goalkeeper. "So," Kevin said, "did you have fun?" Andrew was too tired to put any heat in his words. "You are despicable, Kevin Day. I don't know why I keep you around."
- Kevin only smiled, slow and sure and pleased, and offered Andrew a hand. Andrew looked at it, then at Kevin, and let Kevin haul him to his feet.
- "Why do you have his drugs?" "I hold onto them when he's adjusting his schedule," Kevin answered. "Game nights or nights like tonight when he wants to go into withdrawal, it's better if someone else keeps the bottle. If he has his pills he'll take them. He won't be able to help himself."
- "When I said I wasn't Andrew's type, I meant it. It's not about my looks or faith. It's that I'm a woman." Neil heard her words but was slow to understand them. He blinked at her in confusion, blinked again when it clicked, and said a little too loudly, "Oh. Then Andrew and Kevin—"
- "Andrew won't agree to this," Abby said, a last-ditch effort to change their minds. "Going means leaving Kevin behind. They haven't had more than a campus between them since Andrew took Kevin under his wing."
- "Kevin," Andrew called from out of sight. Kevin nearly knocked the chair over in his hurry to answer. Neil watched from the doorway as Andrew stopped almost right up against Kevin. Andrew pat Kevin down for imaginary injuries and Kevin stood motionless until he was done."
- "Look at that face, Bee. He wants me sober more than almost anyone does, but only if the timing's right. I warned you, didn't I? Who will take care of Kevin if I'm gone? I can't trust him wandering around here by himself, and Coach can't be with him all the time. Kevin's kind of a full-time job."
- "I can't believe you're sending Andrew away," Kevin said, a little sharply.
- "She shouldn't have taken Andrew away," Kevin said in a low voice.
- Kevin is not like us; he is valuable but he is not property in the same sense. He escaped because he had family to run to." "Andrew?" Neil guessed.
- “Kevin had spent the better part of a year trying to get through to Andrew. He wanted Exy to mean something; he wanted Andrew’s best preformance like a dying man wanted one last breath of air. Andrew knew it, and he refused to play along.”
- (this one’s long:) "So you'll try," Kevin said through gritted teeth, "because Coach asked you to."
Andrew folded his arms across his knees, tilted his head back, and smiled up at Kevin.
"Careful, Kevin. Your jealous streak is showing."
"For eight months you've told me no. In eight seconds you told him yes. Why?"
"Oh, that's easy." Andrew stuffed the last of his gear into his bag and zipped it shut. He slung the bag over his shoulders and got to his feet, standing up so close to Kevin he almost knocked Kevin back a step.
"It's just more fun to tell you no. That's what you wanted, right? You wanted me to have fun. I am. Aren't you?"
For someone so small, Andrew made a lot of noise when shoved into the lockers. Andrew was laughing as he crashed into the orange metal. Neil didn't know what amused Andrew more: Kevin's violence or the splash of blood that now stained the front of Kevin's shirt. Neil hadn't even seen Andrew take a knife out, but it was in his hand in the air between them. Kevin retreated from Andrew with a sharp curse.
"Jesus, Andrew!" Matt said. "Kevin, are you all right?"
"I'm fine." Kevin put a hand to his chest as if checking the truth of his words. Neil was at the far end of the lockers from them, so he couldn't see very well, but the relative lack of blood made him think the cut was shallow. It was long, but it wasn't serious. It was going to sting when Kevin put heavy armor overtop it tonight, though.
Andrew stepped away from the lockers and got in Kevin's space again. He put the edge of the blade against Kevin's chest over his heart and peered up into Kevin's face. Kevin looked more angry than intimidated as he stared back. Matt started toward them, maybe thinking he had to break up round two of their fight. Kevin didn't look away from Andrew when he motioned at Matt to back off.”
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୨ৎ CHRISTMAS TREE FARM — 🌲
summary : christmas for your girlfriend is uneventful and frankly boring, so you invite her to come with you to your grandparents' christmas tree farm for the holidays
pairing : natalie scatorccio × fem!reader
not proofread and uhhh 1.6k words jesus christ
a/n : uh uh uh this is my first fic so don't make fun of me... this is like a montage thing because i got bored when the scene was too long. ALSO tell me if nat is ooc pls. like I TRIEDDDD but idk. this is absolutely a taylor swift reference, but it's very loosely based on the song itself but I tried
you tap on nat's shoulder before the beginning of class, her head whipping back as if she didn't notice you beforehand.
"what are you doing for christmas?" you asked curiously, leaning over the desk with your knees on the edge of the seat.
"nothing much..." she shrugged.
"really?" your eyebrows quirked up, not really believing her. there's no way she was doing nothing at all for christmas.
"really." she nodded. "we didn't even put a tree this year."
your face contorted into one of surprise, not even a tree? "seriously?" you questioned again, to which she just nodded.
you felt bad for nat. she seemed so okay with doing nothing to celebrate, like it was normal.
she noticed the sympathetic look on your face, sighing as if she were used to it. "it's fine. I don't like christmas that much anyway." she assured, shrugging again.
you scoffed, immediately jumping to offer her a better christmas. "how about you come with me for christmas?"
"every winter break, my dad ships me off to my grandparents in pennsylvania. it's fun." you smiled, hoping she'd say yes.
"I don't know..." she repiled, trying to let you down gently before you cut her off quickly.
"come on, pleaseeeee!!! it'll be so much fun with you there!" you plead, leaving no room for interruption as you continued. "there's so much festivals and parties, and I never have anyone my age to be with pleasepleasepleaseplease—"
as you berated nat with pleases, the bell rung signaling class has now started, the class silencing, you now getting stares for your loud voice.
you found yourself blushing with embarrassment, sitting back correctly in your seat before the teacher started talking, nat stifling a giggle as she looked back to the front of the class.
after class and not very much convincing she agreed to go, and a week later, you two were in pennsylvania.
"so, what are we doing today again?" she asked, stuffing her hands in her jackets pockets, watching you tie your shoes.
"uhh well, first we gonna go eat and then go run errands for the party." you explained, standing up, meeting her at eye level.
she nodded with a grimace at the mention of 'party'. "do we really have to be at the party? can't we just stay in your room? we can watch that one movie with the turbo dude." she asked with a chuckle.
"what's with the push back on the party? you like parties." you smiled back, walking to open the door, letting her walk through first.
"christmas parties are completely different. It's just fruitcake and awkward questions about school." she scoffed, walking past you.
"it's not that bad." you followed behind her, closing the door and walking beside her. the cold biting at your faces and snow crunching under your feet.
you two made a b-line for the car, rushing in and turning the heater on.
"can we at least leave if it's as bad i know it will be?" she asked sarcastically with a shiver in her voice as the warmth hit her, her back hitting the passenger seat.
"fine. but you will enjoy it." you answered, relaxing in the car before you started driving. "sure i will." she scoffed as she smiled.
all you could hear was christmas songs on various speakers, adults chatting, and kids screaming and running like animals.
some were in the barn where it was warmer and smelt like food and pine, others we dancing under the pretty warm string lights hung on the trees and pillers.
nat clung to your side, only talking when it was to you or when your family members pestered about who she was in your life.
"y'know, I'm not sure how I feel about you call me just a friend." nat taunted, sipping on her apple cider that was still warm.
you scoffed and rolled your eyes at the tease. "shuddup." you push her with no real force.
"so you like it?" you asked, changing the subject. she tilted her head slightly in response. "the party." you clarified, making her click her tongue and nodded as she understood.
"its pretty, I guess." she shrugged nonchalantly. you looked at her with unimpressed expression. "nat."
"it's cute! not as annoying as I expected." she answered. "so you like it?" you raised your eyebrows with expectatance, and she sighed. "just a little." she smiled, looking around before quickly kissing your cheek.
after a week filled with christmas movies, parties, and festivals, it was finally christmas morning, and you were awoken by nats body warmth contrasting the cold of your room.
you sat up with a yawn, rubbing your eyes as the holiday spirit waited to invade your brain. you turn your head to look at nat sleeping comfortably on her side, and you had half a mind to just cuddle back to her and rest for longer, but you know your grandparents were early birds and would come to wake up any moment.
"nat." you croak out, your voice soft from just waking up, shoving her lightly in a half assed attempt to wake her.
"nattttt." you continue, shaking her shoulder before she started whining, waking, curling more into the blanket to where her fried blonde hair only peaked out.
"come on. it's christmas." you stated, shoving her again. you moved your body so you were sitting on your legs, facing her. "come onnnnnnn." you murmur, laying your body weight on top of her, hearing a muffled groan from the covers.
she poked her eyes out of the blanket, looking at you with a sleepy look on her face. "fine. get off." she mumbled, pushing you off of her with a smile, sitting up.
"I don't even see the point of me going down. you're the one opening the gifts." she argued, stretching her back.
"I got you plenty of gifts. obivously." you scoffed, acting offended at the notion of you leaving her giftless on christmas.
"okay, my bad then." she grumbles with a smile, giving you a quick peck on the lips.
the whole scene was pretty domestic. waking up on christmas together, getting her loads with gifts? adorable, right?
you sat back up with her, getting out of bed, urging her to do the same. she followed suit, the cold hitting both of you.
you both made your way downstairs, the warmth of the fireplace growing as you stepped closer to the living room.
getting gifts for nat wasn't that hard, not when all she talked about was rare cds and merch from artists that she couldn't afford to get herself.
"holy sh— moly..." she stuttered, whipping her head behind at your grandparents watching you two open gifts and the game simultaneously.
she looked back at the signed cd copy of 'bleach' from nirvana. "how did you get this?" she asked with wide, grateful eyes. "I dunno ask santa." you shrug with a proud grin.
she rolled her eyes, setting the cd next to her like it was made of glass. "well, thank you, santa." she played along.
you and nat glanced at the tree, and the torn wrapping paper and gift bags around you. "I think that's it?" you guessed with a shrug. your girlfriend copied you before gasping, scrambling to her feet. "wha—"
"just wait a sec!" she yelped, running back up the stairs.
"she's odd." your grandpa mumbled once she was out of ear shot. your eyebrows furrowed at the criticism. "don't be rude." your grandma scolded, hitting his shoulder lightly.
nat came rushing back, sitting back in her former spot in a huff. holding out a tiny gift bag. "it's just a little thing." she shrugged off before you got the chance to say anything.
the edges of your lips quirked up at the bag now in hand. "thank you, nat." you smiled. you took away the tissue paper, digging your hand in the bag and pulling out some of your favorite candy.
"that's not it." nat pointed before you could react. you continued digging in the bag, finding various trinkets and small toys that reminded nat of you. honestly the bag was pretty stuffed with things.
but the main thing that caught your eye was the cd that had a printed picture of you and nat, posing while you were mostly likely tipsy or high. or both.
nat watched silently as you looked and smiled at the gifts, trying to act calm, yet she looked at you with approval seeking eyes.
"I know it's kinda dumb bu—" she admitted before you cut her off. "no no no! it's great, nat. I love it." you assured with a chuckle, opening up the cd to see a handwritten track list of sings from various artists.
the gift was obviously very heartfelt, and you found your checking warming at the songs she chose.
she sighed and nodded in relief at your approval.
-
you sat on the couch, as nat laid her head on your lap, both of you bundled in blankets infront of the fire as you watched home alone.
"hey nat?" you murmur, breaking the comfortable silence.
nat picked her head up, looking at you. "hm?" she hummed.
"did I give you a good christmas?" you asked softly, your hand continuing to play with her hair.
a smile appeared on her face before nodding. "yes. you gave me a pretty good christmas." she admitted.
"do you still not like christmas?" you questioned more with a slight smile.
she grin grew as she nodded again. "I like it a little more now." she she sighed. you couldnt help hut feel a little proud that you were the reason she liked christmas more.
"I love you." she blurted causally, and you couldn't help but laugh a little at the sudden declaration.
"I love you too, nat." you smiled back, running a hand through her hair. she hmed and grinned before moving to lay back on her lap, content with your response.
you furrowed your eyebrows in amusement before sighing and going back to the movie.
-
okay boom done go away. I didn't even mean to post it rn my app just glitched whatever I'm gonna kms bye
@pinkcatsthatfly wanted to be tagged
#ྀི juno writing question mark ?#natalie scatorccio#natalie scatorccio x reader#natalie scatorccio x you#nat scatorccio#nat scatorccio x reader#yellowjackets x reader#yellowjackets
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🔞
Main Masterlist here
Finding Masterlist here
Summary: After a failed engagement you move back home and reconnect with your friends. Maybe, just maybe you can find love with someone you never expected.
Pairing: Yoongi x F. Reader
Warnings: Explicit Sex, Swearing, Cheating (Not Yoongi), Fighting, Unprotected Sex, Protected Sex, Toxic Past Relationship, Stealing Prescription Drugs, Selling Drugs,
Genre: Enemies(?) to Lovers, Neighbors to Lovers, Small Town romance. Hurt-Comfort, Slight Angst, Romance
A/N: I'll probably skip updating next week, but I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and a happy New Years! (If you celebrate) If not, I hope you have an amazing day, and I'll see you all in two weeks!
“Strawberry shortcake,” Mrs. Lee tells you as you bag her purchases in her reusable floral print tote. “That's why I need so many strawberries. My son just loves my strawberry shortcake. Do you remember Hyun, Y/N? I think you went to school together.”
“Umm, yeah, I remember him,” you confirm as you slide her the bag of red morsels, but she seems to ignore the gesture. “He was always really nice.” He wasn't. He was a dick but you couldn't say that to her.
“He's single, now and I heard through the grapevine that you are too. I always thought he had a little crush on you,” she informs you, and you sigh internally. “I can give you his number, but he has to be home by eight o'clock. He could use a good girl like you to keep him on track.”
“On track? He has a curfew?” You ask warily, nudging her strawberries closer to her with the tip of your finger, but she still chooses to ignore them. “At our age?”
“Well he's on parole…” she starts with a small shrug of her shoulders as if that wasn't a big deal.
“I'm sorry….what? You realize I'm a teacher, right? I can't date criminals,” you tell her and then quickly shut your mouth at the hard glare she sends you. It made you even take a step back away from the white plastic table between the two of you, afraid that she might jump over the barrier at you. Her glare was murderous.
“He's not a criminal, Y/N! He just made an honest mistake. I didn't think you would be so judgemental, but knowing your mother, I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. You are just as stuck up as she is. ” Mrs. Lee snatches her fruit from the table and stomps away.
“Holy cow,” Tae says with a stunned expression, watching as the mad woman hurries off to her next destination. “You really made her mad.”
“I'm taking a break,” you tell him, and he nods his head in response.
Walking around the table, you round the corner to go behind the tent. You see Hobi and Yoongi standing over some light colored wooden crates filled with vegetables as they hold clipboards in their hands. You approach them and throw your hands in the air.
“This is the last time I'm coming here,” you announce dramatically. “Never again. Nothing good ever happens when I come here. Somehow, I always end up being embarrassed in front of the whole town.”
“This is only your second time coming here,” Yoongi says, not looking away from his paperwork.
“What happened?” Hobi asks, completely turning to you giving into your antics like the good friend he is.
“Why is Hyun on parole?” You answer with your own question. "What could he have possibly done here?”
“Oh, yeah,” Hobi said knowingly, placing his hands on his hips. “He got caught stealing from the pharmacy when he worked there as a technician.”
“He tried selling to some high school kid who ratted him out to the police,” Yoongi adds, finally glancing at you with an amused expression. “Arrested him right here in the middle of town. I unfortunately missed it, but I heard it was funny. Supposedly, he was crying for his mom the whole time.”
“Well, his mother just compared me to my mother, and then proceeded to call me stuck up. Can you believe that? I'm nothing like that woman,” you complain. “Just because I didn't want to go out with her little criminal who had to be home by his curfew.” You watch as the two men share a look and break down laughing. “Not funny.”
“A music teacher and a drug dealer,” Yoongi comments, looking impressed. “You are really racking them up, aren't you?”
“What music teacher?” Hobi asked, looking between you and Yoongi. “Why won't you go out with him? Why didn't I know about this?”
“Because I hate men right now, and I don’t want you to encourage me to go out, ” you tell him. “Also, the last thing I want to do is date a coworker. If it were to go bad, I would still have to see him almost every day.”
“Well, darlin, I hate to break it to you, but your options are pretty limited if you truly are staying in our little town,” Yoongi says. “You probably can't afford to be too picky at this point. Soon, the only men available to you will be at the senior center. I hope you like mashed peas.”
“Well, what about you?” You ask him, crossing your arms in front of your chest. You were about to lose your patience with this conversation. “I certainly haven't seen anyone at your place. What's your excuse?”
It's true. In the one short week that you have been in your new home, you have picked up on Yoongi's habits pretty easily. His routine was the same every day, never changing, always predictable. His garage door rattles loudly, always waking you up at 4:30 in the morning with his headlights shining into your room not long after. He also doesn't seem to come home until well after sunset. By then, you have settled in front of your tv with your dinner when you see him pull into his garage through your living room window. The only visitors that you have seen over there so far were your mutual friends that come and go whenever they please.
However, you have yet to see a woman show up or come home with him, nor has anyone mentioned Yoongi seeing someone. Your comment makes him smirk at you as he places his hands on his hips. Clearly, he is amused. The smug look on his face makes you rethink everything. Maybe you were wrong, and he does have somebody. The traitorous butterflies in your stomach fall a little bit at the thought.
“Keeping tabs on me?” he asks, raising his eyebrow at you. The open mouth smirk he gives you makes your most intimate part clench. She's a traitor, too.
“You wish,” you roll your eyes at him, trying to cover up your embarrassment and arousal. “Your loud ass garage always announces your presence. Why do you have to leave at 4:30 every freaking morning?” Yoongi opens his mouth to probably spit some nonsense at you, but you don't let him. “It doesn't matter. I'm going home to wallow in my misery since the two of you made me feel bad.”
“Don't go,” Hobi says, as Yoongi waves goodbye to you.
“Men!” You exclaim and turn on your heel. You think you need to find new friends.
Kneeling in the green grass of your backyard with your earbuds in your ears, you needed to keep yourself occupied. After storing out of the farmers market, you decided to go home and busy yourself trying out a craft before school on Monday to see just how messy it was. Oobleck, the fun little cornstarch and water concoction was quite fascinating. You can understand why kids love this shit so much. You had several large bowls ready to go so you could mix different colors and dispense them into 18 small containers. One for each child. You wanted your kiddos to get outside and play before the upcoming unpredictable fall weather rolled in. The weather would soon turn cooler, rainier forcing them to be inside more, and you didn't want to rist this craft in the classroom. You carefully measure the cornstarch and dump it into the first bowl. As you grab your pitcher of water, a shadow looms over you, scaring the hell out of you. You whip around, making your earbuds fall out of your ears and consequently dumping water all over yourself with your sudden movement.
“AHH, that's cold,” you squeal, jumping up off the ground and glaring at the man that surprised you.
“I didn't mean to scare you,” Yoongi said, holding his hands up in surrender. He eyed the wetness of your clothes that were now clinging onto your body. You think you saw him quickly wet his lips before averting his eyes quickly.
“What do you want?” You asked, and immediately you cringe at the tone of your voice. You look at him regretfully, softening your tone before bending down and picking up your fallen earbuds. “Did you need something?”
“Hobi and I thought you were joking about leaving, but when we went to the front, you were already gone. He was really worried when we couldn't find you. I was forced to do three laps around the damn place to look for you,” he explains and holds out a decent sized brown paper bag for you to take.“I brought you some apples that we had left over. I shouldn't have teased you like that.”
“No, it's okay. Thank you,” you tell him, taking the bag of apples from him carefully. It was a lot heavier than it looked. You put it down by your feet and kneel back down to your project. “I need to stop being sensitive when it comes to the topic of dating. I'll have to move on eventually or adopt eight cats and live alone for the rest of my life.”
“You're too young to think like that,” he tells you as he towers over your kneeling form as he moves closer, and you try to avoid looking up at him. You could only imagine how that would look.
“Yeah, but the eight cats sound like the better option. I can name them all after sweet snacks. Cupcake, sprinkles, marmalade, he would be orange, …” you say, drifting off with a shrug as you grab your second water pitcher that was thankfully full.
“What are you doing?” He asks, coming to squat down next to you and effectively changing the subject. His swift movement let you catch the scent of his cologne that filled the air around you. Of course, he smelled good.
“Oobleck,” you answer, shaking your head, trying to rid yourself of those thoughts. “For the kids at school. It will be great for their fine motor skills, straightening their hand muscles, and dexterity. That was a really boring answer, wasn't it?”
“Joon says you're a great teacher,” Yoongi says, and it makes you smile.
“I should hope so,” you comment. “If I wasn't, he probably shouldn't have hired me.”
“Need help?” He asks, looking at the empty bowls.
“You don't have anything better to do?” You ask, looking at him skeptically. “It’s Saturday. No hot date tonight at the senior center to get ready for?”
“Very funny. I'm here, aren't I?” He answers and pulls a couple of bowls close to him.
“Did you just call me your hot date?” You question, teasing him, and you swear you see his face turn a light shade of pink. He must have been out in the sun for too long.
“Shut up. Now you are the one who is wishing,” he says, watching you carefully measure your ingredients. “2 to 1 ratio?”
“Yup,” you answer as you mix the dry and wet ingredients together. “That's a lot of apples to just give me. I can pay you for them.”
“Well, we felt really bad,” he says with a shrug and a shake of his head. Dropping down, he finally sits down next to you. His knee brushes your outer thigh, and it makes your heart pick up just a little. “Hobi said that you could probably bake up some stuff with them. From what I hear, you are a good baker. The guys won't shut up about it.”
“Well, maybe now that we are friends….you might find out,” you tell him, focusing on dropping some food coloring in your concoction. The red swirls around and blends together with the white of the cornstarch effectively, turning it pink as you stir it with a plastic spoon.
“Hopefully,” he said softly.
You look at him out of the corner of your eye and watch him diligently work. It's a nice, comfortable silence that falls between the two of you. You watch as he bites his lower lip in concentration, and it does something to you again. Much like that night, he was playing darts at that dark bar all those years ago. You're not sure what it is, but it certainly makes you feel warm all over.
Damn it.
Apple pie, it was good, but you didn't want to deal with having to make the crust from scratch. Apple pie bars, that one was intriguing, but you didn't have pecans, and you didn't want to go to the store. Apple crisp, one of your favorites, but once again, you didn't have any oats. You think you really need to stock your cupboards with food as your finger scrolls through all the apple desserts you can find on Google. Apple cider donut pound cake, now that sounded like too much work. You sigh. You had to use the apples that Yoongi brought you. You personally don't care for apples on their own, preferring them, then baked with a pound of sugar on them. Needing to make them as unhealthy as possible before you could eat them
Making your way to your kitchen, you open your cupboards and grab the ingredients to your famous bread that you had often made in college. The same bread you never baked for Yoongi. The same bread that your friends munched away at giving you thank yous and hugs in front of said man. You feel like a complete bitch when you think back on the memories. You purposely left him out. You hate people like that, and you hate yourself for being that person at one time. You could blame your young age at the time, but you knew what you were doing. You thought he hated you, and you wanted him to feel bad.
It was your grandmother's recipe that you have memorized by heart, but unfortunately, it's been years since you have made it. Changkyun never liked your bread, your cakes, or any food that you had cooked for him. He would often make you order takeout after you spent time and energy cooking for him. He was able to suck the joy out of something that you loved so much that you just gave up on baking. You had given up on a lot of things. You had given up on yourself and lost who you were.
One thing that made you nervous was that you never added anything to the recipe before. You had always stuck to her white bread. It was simple and easy, always a hit. However, you don't see why you can't cook some apples down, puree them, and throw them into the dough mixture. Will it work? You have no idea, but it won't hurt to try. Grabbing your peeler, you’re ready to go to work.
The red apples were peeled, cut into perfect slices, and currently simmering away on your stove in a large pot. The house was filled with the scent of apples and the little bit of cinnamon that you added for flavor. It smelled divine. It smelled homey. Your kitchen door suddenly opens, and Jimin pokes his head in with a pretty smile on his perfect face. You wave him in as you turn your attention back to your stove.
“It smells good in here,” he comments as he fully steps into the house, closing the door behind him. “What are you making?”
“I'm attempting apple bread,” you tell him as he peeks over your shoulder at the stove. “Yoongi dropped off a bunch of apples for me. I want to get them used before they go bad.”
“Dropped them off…..like….. for free?” He asks suspiciously. “You didn't have to pay for them?
“Yeeeah,” you say slowly.
“He never gives anything away for free. He makes all of us pay full retail price when we want something,” Jimin explains. “I wonder why he gave them to you for free?”
“I don’t know,” you say, turning away from his raised eyebrow. You focus on checking the tenderness of the apples with the sharp knife in your hand. Not quite ready. “I think that he's just trying to be nice.”
“I'm sure,” he says with a tick of his head.
“Do you know something I don't?” You ask with an accusing tone, looking back at him over your shoulder.
“No,” he says, shaking his head. “How many are you making?”
“Enough for everyone if it turns out,” you answer. “Anyway, what are you doing here?”
“I was on my way to Yoongi's. Thought I would stop by to say hi. Also, I heard you were collecting boyfriends left and right. The ladies at the grocery store love talking about you.” Jimin says with a smirk. “It was all they could talk about in the cereal aisle. Which, by the way, is on sale. Two for five dollars.”
“Are you serious?” you ask.
“Yeah, I got two boxes of Cheerios,” Jimin says with a devious smirk. You roll your eyes at him and shake your head. “Hobi told all of us about your boyfriends. I personally one hundred percent agree with you, by the way. You don’t need to date right now, but that doesn't mean you can't sleep around and have your own fun.” He tells you. “You know just…keep it safe.”
“Goodbye Jimin,” you say, walking over and opening the kitchen door for him.
“Fine, fine,” he says, walking out of the house after taking your not so subtle hint for him to leave. You see Yoongi walk out of his house with a bag of garbage clutched in his hand. Jimin makes his way across the driveway and up Yoongi's steps. When he reaches the landing, he turns to look at you with a shit eating grin. “You can always get a Tinder account. I'll take the pictures, wear a low-cut top and a push-up bra. Boob pictures will get more right swipes.”
Yoongi looks between the two of you before you raise your middle finger in goodbye. Jimins laughter is the last thing you hear before you shut and lock your door. Going back to your stove, you check the simmering apples once more as you stab them harshly with the same knife as before. The sharp point pierced the fruit easily. They were ready to mash. Oh boy, mash them you did. Maybe a little too hard, leaving sticky apple splatter everywhere. You will regret it later when you have to clean the residue, but right now, it feels nice to get some aggression out. You felt a small sense of satisfaction as you watched them get flattened, exploding everywhere. It was almost therapeutic. You'll have to do this more often.
After an hour in the oven, the warm bread was perfect. It was soft and chewy on the inside with a slight crispy crust around the golden edges. You are surprised that it actually turned out. You thought for sure that the puree was going to make the dough too wet, but it was perfectly sweet with a hint of cinnamon. Pleasantly, surprised and proud of yourself, you wrapped seven loaves of bread in clear plastic wrap for your friends. Biting your lip, your eyes sneak a peek over at Yoongi's house and see that Jimin's car is gone from the driveway. Grabbing one loaf of bread, you leave your house and head over to Yoongi's to deliver the freshly baked goodness.
You look out past your backyard to the fields on your short trek over to his house. The sunset was beautiful this time of the year as summer was drawing to an end, making way for the fall season. The trees were slowly starting to change colors, indicating that the cooler season was indeed just around the corner. Some trees are even starting to lose their leaves when the breeze hits the branches just right. Causing them to flutter slowly to the ground. Ascending his stairs, you gave a quick knock to his screen door. You slowly rock back and forth on your feet as you wait for him. It didn't take long before he opened the door with a look of surprise.
“Hi,” he said in his signature gravelly voice.
“Hi,” you say back with a slight smile. “I used the apples that you gave me. I made this bread for everyone.” You reach out and hand him the baked bread. He takes it from you and examines it with a questionable stare. “I didn't poison it.”
“What?” he asks, and you feel stupid that you made that joke. “No..I….I'm surprised that you actually made me one, I guess.”
“Well, I did. I told you I would,” you say, and you glance back at sunset, trying to avoid the awkwardness of the conversation. The beautiful colors are not helping you at all. “I guess I should go. I have a sticky mess to clean up. Have a good night, Yoongi.”
“Thanks, you too,” he says. You make your way back across the drive, but his voice stops you when you reach the middle. “You shouldn't use Tinder.”
“What?” You laugh as you turn back to look at him.
“It's dangerous,” he says with a nod. “You shouldn't use it. You never know who is really on the other end of a profile.”
“Okay, yeah,” you say, still amused. “I will be sure to keep that in mind. Goodnight.”
This time, he doesn't say anything back. You smile to yourself as you enter back into your house. This new friendship feels nice. It doesn't feel forced like you thought it would. Once you get past the awkwardness, you’re sure it will feel completely normal. It will almost feel like you have been friends with him all along. Like you can forget the past. For the first time since your truce, you are ready to accept that.
Tagged Readers:
@mar-lo-pap, @bontensbabygirl , @daisies-and-dandelionpuffs , @redragdoll, @svnbangtansworld , @wobblewobble822
#yoongi smut#bts fic#yoongi fanfic#yoongi x reader#min yoongi smut#yoongi au#bts smut#yoongi x you#bts yoongi#yoongi fic#yoongi fluff#bts min yoongi#min yoongi#yoongi#suga bts#bts suga
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but my best enemy is you
pt.1!!!, angst, smut, violence, it's a mess
“you're the sweetest” she says, smiling at your flushed face. her thumb softly caresses your cheek.
you lean into her touch, her soft hand on your skin was a feeling which you love more than anything.
“i love you” you whisper against her lips, kissing her slowly and passionately.
“i love you too” her voice is full of love as well as the look on her face, her smile not fading from her lips.
oh, how you wished it would stay on her lips forever.
“you're fucking unbelievable”
“i'm unbelievable? are you seriously trying to blame me?”
“call it blaming, i call it being honest and seeing the truth”
you can't read momo's expression, you can't tell what she's feeling, if she's sad, mad, or just disappointed.
your hand shakes a little, as if you're scared.
you are actually scared.
“i can't”
“we're done”
is she too?
“so just like that? that was it?”
“you're not going to fight for us?”
“you're the better fighter between us, use it in the ring - not in our relationship,”
“or whatever it was.”
“you're an asshole”
“okay”
-
momo swirls the ice in her drink with the straw, watching the fight that's happening.
two men who she never saw before are fighting against each other, it doesn't quite peak her interest.
she thinks it's uninteresting watching them fight - or others in general. they don't have any tension in their fights.
they simply fight to win the money, not because they have a certain history with the person standing in front of them.
basically meaning, momo doesn't care if it's strangers, she only cares when she and you fight against each other.
she knows about the rumors, she knows that more people come into the bar just to watch the two of them.
but she also believes that you don't need to know both of those things, acting cold and like she has no idea about it instead.
the fight ends and everyone but her cheers for the fighters, she turns to the bartender and orders a shot of vodka.
“momo, right?” a red haired girl asks as she sits down next to her.
momo looks at her, nods and then downs the shot quickly.
“who's asking?” she knows.
“jihyo - i'm y/n's trainer” she replies, looking at the ring.
“what are you doing here?” momo asks her, also looking at the ring.
“the same as you, watching fights”
“y/n is actually up next” her eyes widen in shock, not expecting to hear that you're fighting someone else instead of her.
before momo can ask jihyo other questions - the crowd starts to yell and cheer as you enter the ring on the left side.
jeongyeon enters the ring on the right side, receiving a lot of support from the spectators.
momo has heard of jeongyeon before, even fought against her when she first started fighting.
she asks herself who will win.
you're a strong fighter - and the fact that you're not fighting against her makes momo think that you could easily win, since there is no history, nothing that could hold you back from hitting her with all the strength you have in your body.
the referee (again, who's actually just a random guy) blows in his whistle, signaling that the fight is starting.
you block your face with your hands as jeongyeon tries to hit you, moving to the side and hitting her stomach.
jeongyeon looks at you full of anger, as if you'd done something so terrible.
she walks over to you - almost even runs - and hits your throat.
an illegal move.
you gasp for air, falling against the border of the ring, looking up to her being right in front of you.
the referee is too slow, he doesn't stop jeongyeon and she hits another hit in your face.
then your stomach, your side, your chest - literally everything she could hit before getting dragged away by the referee.
you fall down on the floor, blood coming from your nose and mouth.
momo stares at the ring in shock, not being able to move.
what just happened?
jihyo next to her calls an ambulance, rushing to you to check if you're (somehow) alright.
momo slowly stands up and walks closer, a sigh of relief (which she hopes wasn't too loud) leaves her mouth when she sees you sitting up again, holding your head and talking to jihyo (or rather, jihyo talks to you and you try not to pass out).
the medics arrive quickly, a woman with blonde hair gets into the ring and kneels in front of you so she can look at what happened.
jihyo leaves you alone, the crowd slowly relaxes and decides on doing other things than staring at you and your wounds.
everyone but momo.
her eyes are fixed on you, and her.
she can't explain why, but seeing you and her - it makes her stomach drop, gives her this uncomfortable feeling.
“you're pretty” she hears you say to her, to which the girl replies to with a giggle.
she introduces herself as sana to you (a pretty name in momo's opinion, but that doesn't change anything).
momo thinks that she's pretty and nice, she isn't a bad woman.
but she can't help herself to feel jealous.
she has no right to be jealous, but she still feels it. it doesn't matter if she wants to feel that way or not - she is jealous.
-
it has been exactly one week.
one week since you fought against jeongyeon, which led to multiple serious injuries.
one week since you were laughing and giggling like idiots with that medic sana.
momo hasn't been able to stop thinking about it.
she sits down next to you at the bar without greeting you.
you look at the bartender and ask him for a shot of tequila which he places in front of momo before leaving you two alone.
“your favorite” you say, not looking at her. she interrupts you though.
“how are you doing? you looked rough last week” she asks, drinking the tequila quickly after finishing her sentence.
“why do you care?” you ask back, to which momo doesn't reply (or rather - she isn't able to reply).
“what’s up with sana and you?” she says, turning the bar stool so she can fully look at you.
you laugh a little, finishing your beer, “you know, you ask a lot of questions”
she waits for you to answer her question instead of saying something else.
you sigh, realizing she's as stubborn as you often are.
“nothing much. i dont get why you would care, but we're just talking. that's all” you answer.
you turn to her, looking in her eyes, but you quickly look away.
her eyes make you nervous, even after all this time - you still get nervous talking to her.
“if you excuse me, i have to go, was nice talking to you” you say, placing some money on the table as you walk out of the door of the bar.
maybe she's stupid - but she doesn't care.
she walks out of the bar quickly, walking after you.
she sees you walking away, so she runs after you.
her hand grips your wrist and stops you from walking.
you look at her, your mouth opens to say something, but she interrupts you, again.
but this time, she kisses you.
momo pins you to the stone wall behind you, her hands grip the collar of your cropped leather jacket as her lips are on yours.
you're shocked, but you kiss her back anyway.
oh, how much you missed this.
she leaves your lips after a while, salvia connecting you two.
“i don't know why i care,” she starts speaking, her eyes focused on yours.
“but what i know is that i was jealous,”
“seeing you and sana act like we used to,”
“it made me mad, it upset me,”
“she doesn't know you like i do -”
momo isn't a bold person often, but something about today is different.
“she wouldn't be able to fuck you like i do” she whispers against your lips, her hands gripping your waist.
you look at her in silence, her statement sounding not real, like you're in a dream.
you realize that this isn't a dream though.
this time you pull momo closer, kissing her.
“let's go to my place” you mumble in between kisses.
-
everything happens so fast that neither momo nor you can really comprehend what exactly happens.
it's messy and needy (something you always liked).
you sit on top of momo as you’re both making out.
you lean back just a little so your lips part, taking off your shirt.
momo can't help but stare.
it's nothing crazy in your opinion, a simple calvin klein bra.
momo thinks it's so much more than that though.
you're back to kissing her as you slowly kiss down momos neck, biting and sucking, leaving hickeys all over.
you were never this eager for something, ever.
“ah fuck-... i don't know if this is the smartest thing” she whimpers, hands gripping your naked waist, fingers curling into your skin as they slightly scratch you.
the burn you feel is delicious.
“you know i always thought you are a smart girl,” you breathe out against her neck, admiring your work before going for the other side.
“but this is your time to be stupid for once” you whisper, momo bites her lip at your statement.
she pushes you away so she's able to take off her shirt. you get off her lap so you can take her jeans off, being so eager that you're almost ripping them off (if you’d listen closely you would probably be able to hear it).
“come here” she orders, pulling you closer after kicking her pants off her feet.
you're back to kissing her again, opening your mouth so her tongue can explore it.
you can't help but let out a moan when she presses her knee up to your core, grinding onto it.
you push her back down onto the mattress, leaning down so you can place kisses all over her body.
momo watches you, her breath hitches when you press a kiss on her clit over the underwear.
“that sensitive?” you tease her as you lock eyes, momo bites her lip again.
“haven’t done it in a long time” she replies.
you pull off her underwear, it slightly sticks to her because of the slick, making you laugh at her.
“yeah i bet. it doesn't feel as good when you're doing it without me” you comment.
you don't waste your time and shove two of your fingers inside her wet cunt, fucking her in a fast rythmn.
“we should do something like this more often” you smirk, kissing her naked skin.
she simply just nods, moaning and whimpering at the feeling of your fingers inside of her after so long.
you don't wait long, putting another finger in.
momo moans at the stretch, gripping the bed sheets. her bottom lip starts to bleed a little at the pressure she's applying.
“you sound so pretty for me baby” you praise her, pulling your fingers out just to thrust them into her again.
you move your head right next to hers, whispering into her ear.
“such a desperate slut for me, god.. look at you momo” the way you say her name makes momo even needier, clenching around your fingers.
“please” she begs, if you would ask her what she's begging for, she wouldn't be able to answer. her mind is clouded and full of you and nothing else.
“can you take another one, good girl?” you ask, she looks at you, breathing heavily.
“too much-” she moans.
you know how to get what you want with her.
“please baby”
“you're my good girl aren't you? i know you can take it. please, for me” she looks into your eyes, they’re full of lust, full of the desire to ruin momo.
she nods, biting her lip again. if you look closely into her eyes you can even see how glassy they are.
“that's my good girl”
you slowly insert a fourth finger, giving her time to adjust.
momo throws her head back, breath hitching at the feeling.
“you're so tight baby” you tease, slowly starting to move your fingers.
“feel so full mommy-” she whimpers, the name makes you just increasingly eager to make her finish.
you start to thrust into her, making her moan louder and louder.
“i'm so close-” she moans.
“please- let me cum.. god please y/n-” the way she's asking you for permission, how could you say no to that?
“cum for me pretty girl” you keep moving your fingers and it doesn't take long for momo to cum all over you with a loud moan, her breath shaky as well as her legs, breathing heavily as she somehow tries to calm down.
but you don't take your fingers out, looking at her ruined state.
“please” you start begging, and momo knows what you're begging for.
she also knows that she will say yes.
she'll let you overstimulate her till she's crying and sore.
it feels too good to stop.
#feeling silly#twice smut#wlw#twice imagines#twice x reader#girl group smut#momo smut#momo x fem reader#momo x reader#momo angst#momo fluff#twice angst#jihyo x reader#jihyo smut#nayeon x reader#nayeon smut#sana smut#sana x reader#mina x reader#mina smut#chaeyoung smut#tzuyu smut#jeongyeon smut#dahyun smut#twice ff
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i am making the sappy post about darby, finally.
the shoot love in wrestling is something that really gets to me. and it really gets to me with darby because he's a quintessential underdog. like, shoot he used to be a loner and honestly kind of a loser and a guy with an ugly personality. he can be awkward and stuttering and lisping and he has a really fucking mixed bag of tattoos.
if you go back and watch old interviews with him, he's borderline extremely unpleasant, he's rude and obnoxious, it's often demonstrably clear that he's not happy for some reason or another. he's never really mean to the interviewer, but "shows up to the facetime interview from his bed" is like. okay.
but after he joined aew, he started getting better. for the past year and a half especially he's become someone you can trust with things. he's smiley, he doesn't talk deep and slow to account for his lisp anymore. he's trusted to do things, to do media interviews, to carry around belts, to say he wants to be world champ, to represent aew in the climbing of mount everest. tony khan is paying for some (if not all?) of his mountain climbing training. that's insane.
and i don't think you get who darby is today - outwardly generous (he has random people staying with him all the time, to learn to wrestle, to lose weight with his help, whatever they want), smiley and friendly and personable - without the shoot love. you don't have who darby is today without the fact that tony khan believes in him so much. without his idolisation of jon moxley, and that moxley believes in him for real too. you don't get it without darby being trusted to work with sting - sting! the iconic wrestler sting! and then sting trusting darby's opinion that sting can return to in-ring wrestling (instead of just cinematic amtches). in the present, darby is training sting's son to wrestle. all of that is love.
there's love with the bucks too, who wanted to hire him, who love that he skateboards and stuck up for him incorporating that into his gimmick. who have wanted to wrestle with him before and then got to do that multiple times this year. darby who appears in the background of bte doing stuff like building skateboards for matt. who nick does all the primary checking-on during stunts in their matches. darby can't manage to kayfabe say a bad word about them, he's like "yeah the bucks hired me and i'm so grateful for everything they've done and they're amazing. btw they suck yeah boo hiss evps" it's fucking... cute...
and darby and brody have such a long and deep friendship that they can't wrestle without brody making some proclamation about how they're going to do it forever. brody has a tattoo about darby. eddie kingston had darby for about 1 match before becoming a Ruffling His Hair guy. adam copeland went one step further and said i'd had this boy for one match and i'm going to cuddle him and kiss him on tv. ridiculous sweet stuff.
i'm not putting darby on a pedestal, because he's fallible and imperfect and he's done weird and bad stuff, but i'm not using this post to talk about something that requires a genuine nuanced conversation, i'm using it to talk pathetic and wax romantic about my number one favourite wrestler.
i think he is one of those people who you can really shoot see the development of from an unfriendly gremlin into like, a gremlin that everyone loves for some reason. everyone around him loves him and wants to give him good opportunities and he pays that back so much, as often as possible. he does it by being the pinch hitter when nobody else is right for it, even at the expense of his own body. he does it by raising money for the skateparks that saved him as a kid. he does it by looking after the people around him - making sure his parents never have to work again. he does it by wrestling well, at the top of his game and still improving.
and i'm soft and i believe that love did all that. i think without the people who love him he'd still be a weird off-putting little mess.
and i hope 2025 is his year. i wanna see him at the top of every mountain he wants to climb.
#tal.png#darby allin#runs arund in. a circle.#yes i'm outing myself as a loser and a guy with a tender heart
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SINSMAS MAJOR SPOILERS!
I haven't seen too much of it on here but I've seen a lot of it on Tik Tok so I wanna fucking say something about it.
People are saying that Millie cheated on Moxxie and that's why she was panicking and didn't tell him right away when she found out and I am willing to bet everything I have that is not what happened.
People's arguments are that she called Sallie May first and was freaking out like she's realising she can't hide it anymore, but that's not what I got from her reaction at all. It is very normal for people to freak out and panic during first time pregnancies, especially if it was unplanned which I'm willing to bet that this is. And I also think it's pretty normal to first tell someone that you're close with, but isn't very directly involved, like a friend, or in this case, her sister.
Millie might not know how Moxxie is going to react, because even though I think he'd be very supportive and happy and be a great dad, having your own kid can be different, and telling someone literal life changing news like this for the first time can be scary even if you think they would be happy so I think its reasonable that Millie talked to Sallie first.
There are also other reasons why Millie could have been panicking about having a baby, and the one I'm seeing the most is their job. Raising a baby or being pregnant while being a literal assassin can be very dangerous, and Millie might not want to give up her job for the baby and I swear to god if I see anyone calling her selfish for that you're getting blocked instantly because shut the actual fuck up that's also pretty normal. I don't think anyone would say that but just making sure.
Millie also might not be ready to be a mother. Again, a pretty common thing and a pretty normal reaction in that situation.
So my money is on Millie is just scared and nervous because it was unplanned, its new, and she might possibly be scared of raising a kid in a very dangerous business. She's scared herself and still coming to terms with it so she might not be in the right head space to tell Moxxie immediately, but I bet when she does, he is going to be very supportive and happy, and reassure her that everything will be fine. He might even freak out a bit himself, but like I said, that's pretty normal. And I bet they would be great parents and Blitz and Stolas would be great babysitters.
Also, I feel like if she did cheat, there would be a bit more proof and foreshadowing. I know you don't usually recognise foreshadowing until after watching something and going back, but hear me out. When that demon lady was talking about her husband cheating, Stolas was really guilty. I feel like if Millie cheated, they would put more signs, and I feel like they would have her in the background looking very slightly guilty at the moment as well. It's kinda nonsense but at the same time it also makes sense because most plot twists have subtle hints of it before hand so it doesn't completely come out of the blue and people can spot all the signs on a rewatch. I think if Millie cheated, some good foreshadowing would be that and that wasn't there. Again, it's nonsense, but it's part of my defense.
So, in conclusion, I don't think Millie cheated, and stop finding reasons to hate her because I'm convinced that's what some of these people are doing. Her reaction and calling Sallie May is very reasonable and normal when you put more than one ounce of thought into it, and I can't believe I even had to say all this in the first place.
Good day.
#hellaverse#helluva#helluva boss#helluva boss millie#helluva millie#millie helluva boss#millie hb#moxxie knolastname#helluva moxxie#helluva boss moxxie#moxxie#moxxillie#m&m helluva boss#helluva boss spoilers#helluva boss sinsmas#sinsmas spoilers#sinsmas#blitzø#blitzo helluva boss#helluva blitz#helluva boss blitz#blitzo#helluva stolas#stolas helluva boss#helluva boss stolas#stolas goetia#stolas
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Recipe for the Perfect Christmas 12/12
One part small town girl coming home from the big city. One part handsome stranger. Five parts lifelong friends (don't forget to include their partners). One part stubborn father. A dash of Christmas spirit. Part: Twelve of Twelve Pairing: Oscar Piastri x ofc (with appearances from Mark Webber. Lando Norris, Carlos Sainz, Esteban Ocon, Pato O'Ward, and George Russell) wc: 5,670 warnings: none soundtrack: spotify ⋆❆⋆ apple music nav: One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight | Nine | Ten | Eleven | Twelve a/n: the ending is here!! can't believe I panic wrote 60k words in less than two weeks but here we are. thank you to everyone for reading! (i will post a small epilogue tomorrow)
"Hey, Natalie? You got a minute?"
Looking up from sorting the papers on her father's desk, Natalie saw Max in the office doorway. It hit her again that this was now his office and she was relieved that the pang in her chest wasn't as sharp this time. "Yeah, sure," she said, standing. "What's up?"
He waved at her to sit back down and stepped inside. The apron he wore made him look a little odd in her opinion, though she knew she would get used to seeing him wearing one. She knew that he and Eve were technically living in town now. Oscar had told her there were just a few things left at their place in Fairview to bring down. Now that he wasn't going back and forth, Max had begun coming to the bakery every day. And though it had felt weird, having him standing next to her while she prepped croissant dough for the next morning, over the past week she had come to enjoy his company. He fit right in, the customers liked him, and he knew nearly as much as her father did about baking. He was as likeable, with a bit of sarcasm in some of his quips, and she had seen him work enough in the past week to know that he was a perfectionist.
"Is everything okay?" she asked when he sighed and shoved his hands into the pockets of his apron. An instant later he was pulling his hands out and fiddling with the snow globe on the edge of the desk.
"Yeah, no, everything is fine," he said with a quick smile. "I just wanted to…"
He sighed again, and Natalie frowned. "What, Max?"
"You know Eve's pregnant?" he asked, picking up the snow globe.
"She is? I didn't know. Congratulations," she said, grinning.
"Thanks." He grinned as well, reminding her that he was a devoted father. "We're not telling everyone yet because it's early, but… " His grin only widened. Turning the snow globe in his hand, he tipped it until the glitter and fake snow inside collected at the top. "We're pretty excited."
"New town, new house, new business, new kids… You two just have to go the extra mile, huh?"
"No kidding," he chuckled. He held the snow globe upright, watching the snow and glitter swirl. "Anyway, she won't be able to help out for long. Her pregnancy with Lucas wasn't easy and she was put on bedrest. I'm not saying that's gonna happen this time around, but we're gonna need to be careful, you know?"
"Yeah."
"And I'm still learning my way around here," he went on, setting the snow globe back down. I know Mark's only a phone call away and unless I've got him wrong, he'll show up at least every other day, but…"
"You don't want to bother him," she guessed, warming to him even more.
"Exactly. And, um, you know this place better than I do."
"Not really."
"You do, Natalie. And you've done a damned good job. Mark told me he couldn't have kept everything going these past few weeks without you." Max sighed again. "What I'm saying is…"
Natalie waited for him to either gather his courage or his thoughts. Looking down at the paper in her hand, she wondered if her father needed a receipt from an order he'd placed six years before. Knowing him, he would want to hold onto it just in case. She leaned to set it in the stack of receipts that she would later work to organize by date and then find the spot in the filing cabinet for them.
"Would you consider staying on?" Max asked.
"Staying on?" she echoed.
"At least part-time. Until after the babies are born and Eve can get back to work."
"That's a year from now," she murmured.
"Yeah, at least," he sighed. "I don't know what your plans are after Mark's surgery, but if you're gonna stay in town, I'd love for you to keep working here."
"I—" Natalie faltered. She thought of the voicemail she had saved on her phone from Katie in Atlanta. Katie, who'd emailed her photos of a cute apartment with a nice view. Katie, who'd offered her a bonus to assist her in her move. Katie, who she hadn't called because she was still warring with herself over whether she wanted to accept the job. She both did and did not.
"You're good at this. You're great at baking. You'd be a huge help. I'm not trying to guilt you, but I know Mark would rest a little easier knowing you were here. Hell, I'd be a little easier knowing you were here. And I think the people that come in here every day would be less upset about me taking over if they knew a Webber would still be in the shop." He cleared his throat and pulled a slip of paper from his pocket. "I sat up late last night doing some figuring, and this is what I can offer for pay and benefits."
She took it, looking at the neatly written figures. "Can I think about it?"
"Sure. Just let me know in a couple days, because if you don't want the job, I'll have to look into hiring someone else."
She nodded. "I'll let you know tomorrow."
"Great." He smiled and turned to leave the office. "We're still on for tomorrow night?"
"Yep." It had been her father's idea to have a Christmas Eve party and invite a few people over. Nothing fancy, mainly finger foods and treats and Mark's special Santa's Whiskers cookies, hot cocoa and coffee and eggnog, Christmas cartoons and carols. When she had left the house he had been at the kitchen table, making lists of what he needed to get done. It had given him a new sense of purpose, especially when Max and his family, her friends and their partners and kids, and Oscar had said they would come.
"Perfect, you can just tell me tomorrow night, then," he said before leaving.
Turning back to the papers, she began to sort, softly humming along to the music Max had playing in the kitchen.
The bakery was moving into good hands, she thought, smiling when she heard Eve's laugh as Max began to sing along with Nat King Cole. It would forever hold memories for her, both good and bad, but she now accepted that it was time for a new set of memories. Lucas would no doubt picture his father at the counter, grinning and offering him a cookie. Grace would soon learn all the nooks and crannies where she could tuck herself away to read or play quietly. Max and Eve would love the building and everything in it. Maybe not as much as her father did, at least at first, but they would with time. And their obvious love would keep customers coming.
She picked up the slip of paper Max had given her and read it over again after she had sorted all the papers in the desk. It was a generous offer. Not as much as she would make in Atlanta, but… The cost of living here was a lot lower.
Another tick in her mental pros and cons list.
After storing the keep pile and tucking the questionable pile into a large envelope, she glanced around the office. Her father had already taken out the things he wanted at home. A few photos, gifts customers had given him over the years.
She turned slowly to look at the hook on the wall, expecting to see her mother's apron where it had always been. The hook was empty and the air left her lungs in a shaky exhale. Had he taken it home? She hadn't seen it in the box of stuff she'd carried inside from his truck. She reached for her phone to call him and ask him, then remembered he was busy in the kitchen. He wouldn't answer, if he even had his phone on him. She could wait until she got home and ask him.
Stepping out of the office, she spotted Eve heading out the back door and stopped her. "Did you see the red apron hanging in the office?"
"The one with flour?" Eve asked.
Natalie nodded, a bundle of panic forming in her gut. "Yeah. I-it was Mom's."
Eve's expression softened. "I didn't know. When Mark was here this morning he took it down."
The panic fled and she let out a soft sigh. "He took it home?"
"Yeah. I offered to just throw it in the laundry but he said no." The woman's eyes flashed with sadness. "I hope I didn't upset him."
"You didn't, I promise. He told me once it would hang there until the place was no longer his."
"That's beautiful." Eve smiled sadly. "I wonder if…"
Her gaze drifted to her husband and Natalie knew what she was wondering. She doubted she should comment, since she didn't know them intimately, but she was already starting to nod. "Yes."
"You think so?"
"I know so."
Penny cautiously circled the room, nose pressed to the floor. Her tail wagged slowly as she explored, occasionally snorting, and when she reached Oscar's boot she stopped, head tipping in confusion. Then, with a snort, she moved by him and slipped into the next room. It was the kitchen, and all Oscar could smell when he followed was the faint aroma of fresh paint, but she showed keen interest in all corners and especially in front of the stove. The dog circled the room again, tail wagging faster, and after giving a quick bark she trotted into the little utility room, tail banging against the washer and dryer. After a moment she was back, tongue lolling happily, and stopped in front of him.
"What do you think?" Oscar asked.
"I think I've seen a many things in my life, but I've never seen somebody need a dog's opinion before deciding to buy a house," Carlos said.
Oscar chuckled. "It's gonna be her home, too, if I buy it."
"You still don't know?" Carlos looked up from his phone.
Sighing, he looked around the kitchen. It was small, and the cabinets would need replacing. He had no idea if the L-shaped counter was enough space, or if the spot near the window would hold a table and chairs. He closed his eyes for a moment then looked again, imagining the things he would like to do. Turning, he did the same to the living room and thought of the two bedrooms and little bathroom. Nodding to himself, he leaned down to clip Penny's leash to her collar. She groaned lightly, still unused to it, perking up when he offered her a treat.
"I think I do," he said finally. But still he hesitated, Natalie's words the night before echoing in his mind.
With the bonus they're offering I could hire someone to help Dad out around the house.
It seemed she was leaning closer to moving to Atlanta, despite her whispers that she needed him.
He thought of the offer his father had given him. Back home, he would be close to his parents. Not that they needed him nearby. They seemed more energetic now than they had when he was a child. And even if they did need one of their children near, one of his sisters lived two houses down. But he would be close to home, even if it hadn't felt like home since his grandmother had died, and he would have steady work, even if it did feel like a nepotistic handout.
"I'll let you know for sure in a couple days," he told Carlos as they walked outside. Then, realizing the date, he chuckled. "Or maybe the first of the week?"
"You know where to find me," Carlos told him with a grin. "Or let me know at Mr. Webber's tomorrow?"
Penny buried her nose in the rosebush next to the steps as soon as her feet hit the ground.
"Mr. Wright grew that from a cutting his mother gave him." Carlos watched Penny sniff around the rosebush. "She grew hers from a cutting her mother gave her, and the story was that her grandparents brought he original plan over with them from Scotland."
"Is there one at his sister's?"
"Yes. We have one at home, Sasha was given a cutting when we moved in." Carlos shivered. "Weather's changing."
"Yeah," Oscar agreed, though he had no idea how the man could tell. It was almost warm, the sun peeking out occasionally from clouds that spit pitiful rain every few minutes. "I was hoping for a white Christmas."
"It'll happen." Carlos nodded.
Oscar squinted as the sunlight appeared, as though to prove the prediction wrong. "I'll take your word for it."
Promising to let Carlos know by the first of the week, Oscar opened his truck door. He unhooked Penny's leash after she jumped in, and waited until she had moved to sit on the passenger seat before climbing in. The dog gave a small whine after he started the engine and began to back out of the driveway, and he sighed as the sunlight disappeared and rain began to splatter on the windshield.
"I know, girl," he murmured. As he drove towards Max's house, he wondered if the dog would enjoy his old home.
***
Christmas Eve dawned, cold and cloudy. Natalie shivered when she pulled back the curtain and saw the heavy frost on the ground, sparkling in the early morning light. The sunlight was weak. When she looked up to the sky she could see clouds starting to creep in, and thought of her father's prediction for a heavy snow.
There was music playing in the kitchen when she got downstairs, and the smell of coffee and pancakes and sausage. She slipped around her father to fix her plate, quickly getting out of his way. The counters were covered with ingredients and utensils and the beginnings of his prep work for the food they'd eat that night. She ate her breakfast quickly, almost silently, her father too focused on his different stations to be conversational.
There was a fitful snow starting to fall when she rinsed her dishes and put them in the dishwasher. Unsure what else to do, she pitched in to help her father get cookie dough and pastry dough ready to chill, mainly moving behind him to wash dirtied utensils and wipe off the floured surfaces once he finished. She wasn't needed, she realized when they bumped into each other the third time. At a loss, she finally washed her hands and looked out at the softly floating snowflakes.
"Max offered me a job," she blurted.
Mark stopped chopping pecans. "Did he?"
"At the bakery."
"Doing what?"
"What I've been doing." She paused. "He can offer me a decent pay."
"Do you want to?" he asked carefully.
"I think I do."
"What changed?" There was no hurt in his voice and for that she was glad.
"The bakery doesn't hurt anymore," she admitted. "And it would be part-time, so I could still do writing on the side. Plus, he needs the help."
"He doesn't."
"Eve's not gonna be able to help him out for long." She told him the news, enjoyed the warmth of his surprise and joy for them. One day, she hoped, she would be able to tell him that she would be having a baby and could only imagine his delight. At one point when she had imagined her future children they had been vague, dreamlike figures. When she closed her eyes and thought of them now, they had distinct grins and chocolate brown eyes.
"I thought you were going to Atlanta."
"I thought I was too," she whispered. Opening her eyes, she saw the tiny flakes were growing larger.
"Penny go?"
"Of course Penny's going. Mister Mark would turn us away if we didn't bring her." Max laughed and held up the pair of pants. "Get these on."
"Cookies."
"Not now, you'll ruin your appetite." Max grabbed his son's swinging leg and before Lucas could slip out of his grip he had the pants up to his knees. Then he paused. "…Do you need to pee?"
"Need cookie."
"You want a cookie. You don't need a cookie."
Lucas shook his head. "No want. Need."
Max sighed with defeat and turned to Oscar. "Help."
"Hey, you created him, I'm just the guy that spoils him rotten."
"He's got his mother's sweet tooth. Do you know what he had for breakfast this morning?"
"Yeah, waffles."
"Before that." Max tugged his son's pants up and caught him before he could slide off the bed. "Shoes, Lucas."
Oscar handed over a shoe. "What did he have?"
"Brownies."
Oscar stared at his friend. "You gave him brownies? And you're still alive?"
"Barely," Max muttered. "It's not my fault that he got his mother's pout, too."
"Not to mention your stubborn attitude," Oscar pointed out when Lucas began to crawl across the bed after one shoe had been slipped onto his foot.
"It took me two hours to get my ass out of trouble." Max leaned forward and dragged his son back towards him. "I don't even know if there is a rosebush that grows purple roses naturally."
"There is."
"Thank god." Max slipped the other shoe onto Lucas and stepped back with an exhausted sigh. "Done!"
Lucas slipped off the bed and stood, brow puckering, one hand clutching the edge of his mattress. "Pee."
"You've got to be kidding me." Max dragged a hand over his face. "I just asked—And you said—If I give you a cookie will you go pee in the potty?"
"Cookie!" Lucas squealed as he was scooped up, and his giggles rang in the air while Max hurried into the bathroom. "Cookie for pee!"
Laughing, Oscar pushed himself to his feet. "You're bribing him."
"I'm doing whatever works. I'm trying to get some headway on this before the baby comes."
"That's months away."
"Do you not know how long potty training can take?" Max snorted. Then his voice softened. "You done?"
"Pee."
"Yeah, son, pee. Have you finished peeing?"
"Cookie."
"After you pee."
"Cookie."
"In a minute."
There was absolute silence. Oscar counted along in his head, biting back a laugh as the seconds stretched on. Then, triumphantly, Lucas clapped. "Cookie now!"
"I don't have a cookie right now."
Lucas's long-suffering sigh was audible even to Oscar. "I done."
"I can't do this again," Max announced after helping his son wash his hands. "Grace was easy. He's stubborn as hell and has me wrapped around his finger. He pouts just like Eve and I give him whatever he wants."
"Grace has you wrapped around her finger, too," Oscar told him, following them into the hall.
"You're right," Max chuckled. Swinging Lucas up onto his hip, he headed down the stairs. "You ready to go?"
Oscar opened his mouth to say that he would drive himself, not wanting to be squeezed between the two car seats in the back of Max's SUV. His phone began to vibrate incessantly and he pulled it out, frowning when he saw Mr. Wright's name on the screen. "Yeah, almost. I'll meet you there."
He barely heard Max's reply, turning to go into the guest bedroom to answer the call. "Hello?"
"Oscar?"
"Yes, sir." He frowned, walking over to the window to glance out. It had snowed off and on for most of the day, but not heavily. The grass was covered and there was a soft dusting on the road. Squinting at the streetlamp at the corner of the lot, he couldn't see any evidence of anything falling.
"I just got an offer on the house and unless you want it, I'm gonna let them have it."
He almost asked who, but the man went on.
"Tommy's son is getting married in the spring. His girlfriend lives over in Lakefield and he brought her to take a look at the place this morning. She fell in love with it, and…" Mr. Wright sighed. "Have you made up your mind yet?"
He hadn't. So many things were up in the air at the moment. Drawing in a breath, he hesitated. Mr. Wright didn't rush him, and when he saw Max's car pull out of the drive he squeezed his eyes shut. "I…"
"We shouldn't stay long. It's really coming down."
"You don't have to stay. I'm just glad you stopped by." Natalie took a sip of her cocoa and slipped her arm around Susie's shoulders for a squeeze.
"We'll stay a bit longer. Michael is having so much fun."
Looking over to where the boy sat near the tree. He and Grace were chattering excitedly while building some sort of intricate tower using the building blocks Natalie had given Michael. Next to them was the half-finished page from Grace's new coloring book featuring horses and cowboys. Her gaze moved around the room, looking for Lucas, and she smiled when she saw him leaning to get another cookie from the platter on the coffee table.
Hannah was on the couch, talking animatedly with Amira and Sasha, who accepted Lucas when he crawled into her lap. George was squatting next to Mark's armchair, the two chatting while Lilli danced with Carlos to the song playing. Another glance showed Pato and Amira tucked close to each other, talking with Franco and Ollie and Mrs. Jones, who'd arrived with them. Max and Eve were sipping eggnog and talking to Esteban, who was inexplicably wearing a cowboy hat.
"Do you know Esteban and Max were joking around that Michael and Grace should get married?" Susie grunted. "At least, I hope they were joking."
"Arranged marriage?" Natalie asked with a grin.
"Pretty much." Susie was not amused. "It's so disgusting."
"Misogynistic," Natalie agreed with a nod.
"Oppressing and sexist."
Natalie looked on while Grace jumped to her feet and grabbed Michael's hand. The two walked to the center of the room, giggling, both staring up at the ceiling. Her gaze shifted and she saw the bundle of mistletoe her father had insisted she hang from the light fixture.
"Aww," Susie cooed.
Snapping her attention back to Grace and Michael, Natalie laughed. Michael's lips were pressed to Grace's cheek. She could hear the exaggerated smack of the kiss, and then again when Grace kissed his cheek. Giggling, they skipped back over to the blocks and resumed their play.
Natalie turned to her friend. "Then again, they may have a point."
"Guess I should drag Esteban over for a kiss."
Natalie rolled her eyes. "Like he needs mistletoe to kiss you."
"No, but it's tradition." Susie smoothed the front of her sweater and flicked her hair over her shoulders. "Excuse me."
Shaking her head, she watched Susie move across the room to her husband, who was still chatting with Eve. Max had been with them, and she now saw he had stepped into the dining room. She watched him frown at his phone before slipping it into his pocket, and when he reentered the living room she softly called his name.
"Have you heard from Oscar?" he asked.
"I was about to ask you the same thing." Everyone else had arrived nearly an hour before. She hadn't worried, because he had promised he was coming. He had sent her a text just before Pato and Amira had gotten there, saying he would be a little late. Reaching to pull her phone from the pocket of her jeans, she groaned when she saw it had died.
"I just called him, it's going to voicemail."
"Did his phone die again?" she sighed, setting her mug of cocoa on the mantle and heading into the kitchen. "That happened the night of that bad storm a couple weeks ago."
"Either that or he turned it off. He does that when he's got to think about something."
Plugging up her phone, Natalie drummed her fingers on the counter for the entire three minutes it took for the device to charge enough to power on. It seemed to take twice as long for the Apple logo to appear, and four times as long before the lock screen finally loaded. She unlocked it, then gave the phone time enough to catch any missed calls, voicemails, or texts.
"Anything?" Max asked, looking up from his own phone.
She opened the text she had received and frowned, confused, as she read the words that had been sent more than thirty minutes before.
I'm coming. I've just got to figure a couple things out. I might not be able to get the house. I might take the job with Dad. But I need to know what you're gonna do. I know I shouldn't make life decisions based on just four weeks of knowing someone but I am.
"Well?"
"I've gotta go," she blurted, pushing away from the counter. Max stumbled when she bumped into him, and she muttered a quick apology as she heard his phone hit the floor. Hurrying out of the kitchen, she noticed but didn't really see Esteban and Susie kissing sweetly beneath the mistletoe. It occurred to her as she snatched her coat off the rack that she should tell her father where she was going, but she heard his warm laugh and decided she didn't have time.
The snow was coming down thick and heavy. The street was white and she walked quickly as she could, slightly lightheaded from the snow whirling around her. When she reached the corner of Halifax Street her steps quickened, and she heard the snow crunch beneath her boots as she reached the beautiful Victorian house. Bedecked in lights, trees twinkling through the upstairs windows and the large window downstairs, it positively glowed with warmth. She skidded to a stop, gasping, and saw that Oscar's truck wasn't in the driveway. She looked at the house again. The lights and snow created an aura of merriment and she could almost feel the joy that would fill the house in the coming years.
She wanted that joy for herself.
Where was he? She walked to the driveway to make sure his truck wasn't there. Saw only Eve's car backed up to the garage. Turning, she began to slowly walk back down the street, barely feeling the cold or the snowflakes landing on her cheeks. He was going to leave. She couldn't blame him. Guaranteed work, close to his parents. She didn't want him to stay here just for her, even if she had called Katie that afternoon and told her she wouldn't be taking the job. Even if she had thought of seeing him every day at the bakery while she worked for Max, who'd seemed overjoyed when she had pulled him into the kitchen as soon as he'd arrived to tell him she would stay on. And when she'd confirmed her father's appointment for pre-op bloodwork the next week, she had thought of Oscar's comforting presence while she waited during her father's surgery, and his easygoing company in those first days after her father came back home to recover.
Stopping on the corner, she wiped the mixture of tears and melted snow from her cheeks, groping in her coat pocket for a tissue. Oscar would leave, and she would stay, and every time Max or Eve mentioned him she would think of everything that could have been.
She was about to start walking again when she heard a dog start barking. It was too loud and clear for it to be inside one of the nearby houses, and she glanced around. Turning, she heard the bark again, coming from down Brickyard Avenue. Funny, but it almost sounded like Penny, she thought, finally finding a crumpled tissue to use to wipe her face. The snowfall grew heavier and she sniffled, about to continue on her way home when movement caught her eye.
A small dog coming up the street. It passed below a streetlamp and she saw the green dog sweater. She blinked in surprise as it bounded towards her. "Penny?"
Of course it was Penny. No other dog in town that she had seen had the same coat and coloring. As the dog approached she heard the jingle of her collar. Glad as she was to see the dog, worry pricked through while she squatted to greet Penny with a hug.
"Where's—"
"Natalie!"
There he was. Coming up the street in a jog, breath fogging around him. Penny ran back towards him and Natalie followed, stride lengthening to close the distance. "Where—"
"My truck broke down, I turned my phone off so I could think, and I left it at the house." He stopped, catching her arm when her boots slid on the snow. "I had to run see Mr. Wright."
"What hap—"
"I don't know, I think it's the alternator. I left it out at Mr. Wright's." He drew in a breath. "I bought the house."
"What?" she gasped, grasping the front of his coat.
"I'm staying. I couldn't let someone else get it, because when I took Penny to take a look yesterday she loved it and because I kept seeing things I wanted to do with the house and the land. It's taking all my savings, and I'll have to eat ramen for a year, but I want it. For the first time since I broke up with Lauren I want to own a house." He was breathless, either from excitement or his run. "Mr. Harrell was at Mr. Wright's, and he said he needs someone to do maintenance on his rentals."
Natalie nodded, though he was speaking so fast she could barely keep up.
"I start week after next. Doing what I did for Max and Eve. It's not gonna be easy, but I know I can do it." He paused and swiped snow from his cheeks. "I don't know what you're gonna do, Natalie, but I have to stay here. Yeah, I know I'm falling in love with you, but I fell in love with this town and all the crazy people in it."
"I'm staying," she told him before he could continue. "Max wants me to stay at the bakery, and Dad needs me. And I'll be able to do my writing. I don't know if I'll find anything I can do remotely, but I'll try. If nothing else I'll start a blog or maybe write that book I've wanted to write since I was a kid. I can't leave again, because if I do I know I'd never come back—"
"Thank god," he breathed, pulling her to him.
"What?" she whispered after his lips pressed to her forehead.
"You're staying. And not for me."
"You're a little bit of the reason—"
"You're staying because you love your dad and you love the bakery enough to help it keep going and because you love this little town," he insisted.
"Yeah," she admitted with a small laugh. "I do."
"And I'm staying because I love this little town and I love being close to my idiot friend and I love that little house."
At their feet, Penny barked.
"And I couldn't take her away. She'd never forgive me for taking her away from Mark."
"Neither would he," she said.
"I'm glad you're staying," he murmured. His arms wrapped around her.
"I'm glad you're staying," she returned. Leaning against him, she felt a giddiness rise up within her as his words finally registered in her brain. "And I'm falling in love with you, too."
"Yeah?" He grinned, his beautiful, adorable grin that warmed her heart.
"Yeah," she whispered just as his lips found hers.
She pulled back moments later, a little dizzy and weak, and gazed up at him. "Come on, Dad's gonna get worried when he realizes I left the party. And there's presents waiting for you."
"Presents?"
"Dad got you something. I did, too."
"I think Max brought my gifts with him," he said, keeping one arm around her as they began to walk. He called to Penny, who trotted alongside them until they reached Natalie's street. Then the dog gave a tiny yip and bounded ahead. Oscar laughed, tucking Natalie closer to his side. "What did you get me?"
"I won't tell you everything, but one of them is a phone charger for your truck."
"A charger." He nodded. "Useful."
"You need it."
"I do."
"What did you get me?" she asked, watching Penny jump up the steps and onto the front porch. Her friends' cars and trucks and Max's SUV were still parked out front and she was glad. All those closest to her would be there to celebrate both her news and Oscar's news. Penny began to scratch at the door and she tried to remember if she'd placed a towel near the door to catch snow. The dog would need a good rub down.
"I won't tell you everything," Oscar chuckled. "But one of them is a book."
"A book?"
"Yeah. It'll come in handy, since you're going to keep working at the bakery."
"What is it?" She stopped halfway up the walk, waving to her father when he opened the door. Oscar waved, too. Mark waved back with the towel he was holding, then closed the door after Penny slipped inside the house.
Oscar turned to her, arm slipping around her waist and drawing her close. "A cookbook."
"A cookbook," she repeated, lifting her eyebrows.
"Baking for Dummies."
Before she could give an indignant reaction, he swept her close and kissed her. She laughed against his lips, too full of hope and joy to be outraged by his gift. She heard the front door open again, music and laughter spilling outside.
Pato's voice rang out, disgusted. "What the hell is with you two and standing outside in the cold?!"
The End
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Love is So Cruel - Yuji Itadori
Synopsis: Your breakup with Yuji was probably one of the worst memories you can think of, even if you dated when you were both so young. Now, both of you have grow and see each other once again at a Christmas party. Outside, Yuji wants to know why he can’t be happy and have you at the same time…
Sigh, you guys have got to hate me. It’s quite literally Christmas Eve and I’m only gifting you sadness. 🙁 the bad thing is I can't stop because angst hurts so bad, but it makes my frontal lobe develope in the right way. Aways, only one more day till Christmas and I promise I will give you all a real gift. Please feel free to comment and request! I love seeing your ideas❤️
Warnings:None, unless you count sadness as a trigger.
Word count: 1.6k
The wind rushed by. Its coldness makes good bumps rise on your skin at the smallest touch. You could be warm, inside with all of your loved ones and friends. A comforting yellow glow illuminated from the house and the light was so enchanting, but you needed to settle something. At first, the party was great. The food was homemade and delicious. A Christmas movie played in the background, something old and familiar that anyone could sit down and watch. Small games were happening in the dining room, gifts were being passed back and forth, and no one was sure what they would get.
It was a beautiful sight, but you weren’t inside to see it. You stood, in the cold, a light jacket providing no warmth, but how could you care about the weather when he was standing right next to you? Even past the small flurries of snow, his light pink hair showed through, looking as bright as it did all those years ago. There was a cup in his hand that he occasionally sipped at. You didn’t have to guess what was in it. You watched him carefully. He looked so grown. He was taller, his shoulder broader, and his teenage features were nothing but a memory. It seemed just yesterday he was bouncing around the school, excited and so naive to exercise curses.
The job kills. Mentally and physically. You were just some of the ‘lucky’ people who had kept all of their limbs. But you weren’t out here to talk about being successful sorcerers. No. Yuji cleared his throat, not daring to look you in the eyes as he said,” So, you and Megumi look happy.”
You can’t stop the soft smile that melts onto your face. You and Megumi had gotten married a little over five months ago and things were going a lot better than expected,” We are.” You were happy, so so happy, but tonight, as Megumi held onto your hips, you had gotten a glimpse of the boy you loved so long ago. His face was showing an emotion you couldn’t pinpoint.
You understood why he wasn’t exactly thrilled that you were dating one of his closest friends, even if your relationship had ended. You understood if you were in his shoes, you would be just as numb. There was no pact. No promise. No soul-binding contract that vowed you would find each other again, so you hadn’t done anything wrong. You had simply…moved on. And you were so sure Yuji had done the same. Before Megumi and you even started dating, you checked Yuji’s posts, finding a gorgeous girl who held tightly too. Sure, at the time you felt how Yuji is feeling now, but you saw no point in grieving over a love that was bound to fall apart.
“Do you remember what you said to me that day?” His voice cut through your thoughts like a heated blade. It stunned you at first, but you slowly made the connection,” I do.” His eyes never left the trees encasing the humble home,” You told me that you will love me forever.” There was no amusement nor sadness in his tone,” And I believed you. I really did.”
You sighed, your breath forming a small cloud of fog,” That doesn’t mean I stopp-“
“Don’t.” He cut you off sharply,” Don’t lie to me. I saw how you looked at him and you never once looked at me like that.” His voice was bitter. Frankly, you scoffed,” We were kids Yuji. I committed to something I didn’t even understand completely. I just didn’t want you to hurt.”
“So you go and marry my best friend?” He spit, his jaw tightening. You inhaled slowly, trying to keep calm,”Did you expect me to just sit around and wish you would come back? I couldn’t do that to myself or Megumi. I had to continue to live.”
There was a reason for these venom-laced words being uttered. You and Yuji’s relationship didn’t end in a pretty way. Yuji had gotten too caught up in the missions and ultimately had forgotten about you and your well-being. So when you would scold him for being reckless, he only found it annoying, and after weeks of petty fights and disagreements, you decided it was time to go on a break. You suggested this in the middle of your guys' worst argument yet. You had already been crying, but when you muttered those words, tears started to flow from Yuji’s eyes.
You hated how he begged you to change your mind. He told you he could change and how much he loved you, but he had said those words before and nothing happened. So as he clung to your body, his tear-stained face in the crook of your neck, you told him the truth.
“I will love you forever. Nothing will stop that.”
A hiccup escaped the poor boy and he held you tighter,” Please, don’t leave me. I'm so sorry for everything I’ve done, just don’t go.”
Your heart panged harshly. Oh, how you wished he could turn his desperation into hate. His broken voice and deep sobs were some of the worst sounds you had ever heard. They made your skin crawl, your hands clamping into tight first, and worst of all, they made this so much harder. How easy it would be if Yuji were to despise your living being. Maybe then you could get through this.
Unbeknownst to you, amid your silence replaying the scene, a single tear streamed down your face and you quickly wiped it off. Love was so cruel. It felt nice to float above the clouds, soak in those mesmerizing sunsets and rises, but suddenly, the screen of ultraviolet was torn from your vision and as you looked down, you realized you were free-falling toward the cold and dark earth. Alas, you had already been crushed.
Slowly you turned your head, gazing longingly at the people inside, and you told yourself it was time to go. For the first time that night, you looked at Yuji willingly,” I’m sorry, again.” He made no comment, but you weren’t looking for one,” Maybe in another universe we could have worked out.”
You turned, body screaming to be free from the freezing temperatures, but in the blink of an eye, you were being forced back towards Yuji, who had grabbed your hand all too quickly. He held you close, your bodies touching. The warmth he was producing was almost soothing, but you didn’t move an inch. You stared up into his eyes and it was as if he had been rejuvenated and you were looking at the same Yuji you held onto that night. Even in the darkly lit area, you could see the sadness welling in his eyes.
“Why not this one?” His voice cracked and you felt a wave of Deja Vu. His eyes searched so desperately for an answer, but you couldn't find one. At least one that could give him peace. It was a soul-shattering display. To see someone so determined to be strong for the people he cared about, being torn apart by losing the only one he loved. If you couldn't see how much you meant to him then, then you surely saw it now.
Guilt was eating away at you and it only got worse as he tried to pull back the tear falling from his eye. Instinctively, you cupped his cheek, your thumb wiping away the droplet and caressing his tired face. You loathed how he leaned into your palm, needing some sort of affection, even as the sparks of hope flickered out.
“I know you’ll find someone Yuji.” You stated under your breath,” Someone who laughs with you. Someone who loves video games and movies,” You let out a bittersweet chuckle,” And I know you will find happiness.” Your tiny smile faded,” Just promise me something.”
“Anything.” He said instantly.
“Promise me that you will go out and find her, instead of only searching in the past.”
Your words hit Yuji right in the heart, but deep down, past the yearning and grief, he knew you were right. So as much as his heart denied it, he nodded slowly. You gave him a smile, one that unfortunately made his heartbeat pick up. Slowly you let go of the boy, trying to ignore how his hold on you lingered until you were taking a step back.
“Hey!”
You both whipped your heads around, finding your loving husband standing in the doorway,” You guys are going to miss dirty Santa if you keep chatting out here.” You watched as Megumi held himself, never one to enjoy the cold, and giggled,” Sorry love, we’ll be inside in a second.”
He nodded, already moving back into the warm room,” Good. I don’t want either of you freezing your ass off.” And with that, he shut the sliding door.
It was quiet after he left. You watched the snow-covered floor, and then you made your way back to look at the man,” I’ll see you around, Itadori.” He didn’t have time to respond as you walked away, heading inside to your husband and the party. Megumi opened the door for you, planting a sweet kiss on you the moment you stepped foot into the room and Yuji could see it all.
The only thing that mattered was that you were happy and if that meant it wasn’t with Yuji, then he was going to have to accept your wishes.
Sadly for both you and him, the only person you described matched only one person. But he had already let them slip through his fingers.
#writers on tumblr#angst#maybe in another universe#why not this one?#jujutsu yuji#jjk fanfic#fanfic writing#oneshot#@ink-stainedkiss#yuji itadori x reader#jjk yuji#jjk itadori#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#jjk#jjk angst#terrible angst#x reader#saddness#megumi x reader#my heart huuuurts#im cryin
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There is a brutal contrast in how Megatron and Optimus's stories end. Optimus nobly surrenders his spark, along with the Matrix of Leadership, having been sent off by his dear and trusted friends after giving them a fond farewell. He has accomplished his life's greatest goal; now he is able to rest. He dies willingly, at peace, bringing hope and giving life to the next generation by restoring the Allspark.
Megatron had already been killed, and was told that he can never join that very Allspark. Having been enslaved, and only released because of Optimus's actions, he is now reanimated, inhabiting his own corpse. His only remaining ally, who has constantly betrayed him, does not understand him. He flies off, alone, having lost all his forces and failed in his mission, and realizing that his life's greatest purpose was misguided. He is left, we can only assume, to live a hellish and hopeless life--a shell, consumed by the past.
And he did not tell Optimus goodbye. He knows that Optimus will leave him behind, will obtain the heaven he can never enter. He gives him the parting gift of his repentance, to acknowledge this. But in his refusal to say farewell, there is an echo of his own wretched endurance. He does not get to rest. Megatron will remain, eternally alone--eternally waiting for a reunion that will never come.
#transformers prime#transformers#megatron#optimus prime#megop#meta#megoptimus#depressing post alert...#just finished watching the predacons rising movie and i was feeling so many things so i had to inflict them on you#just. megatron leaving and KNOWING that optimus will leave him. you can tell in how he says his final words to him#he's of course nominally talking to starscream. but he turns and looks at optimus.#he knows the significance of what he's saying. and he knows that the only reason he is alive is because of optimus#because optimus was willing to sacrifice his own spark‚ to become one with the allspark‚ megatron received his own spark back again.#optimus saved his life.#and megatron knows this. he knows‚ because he has always known optimus and has always been able to see what he does#so he knows that when he leaves it is the last time he will see optimus--to the best of his knowledge‚ in this life or the next#he knows he will likely never join the allspark that optimus is already one with. and he still doesn't say goodbye.#because he can't let go. he isn't able to. he is the remaining half of their whole. the former servant of unicron‚ now without his prime#the primeval opposition‚ now with only one opponent; the original brotherhood‚ now only one without a brother.#his refusal to say goodbye is an expression of his desire that optimus remains. but--as all his desires have been--it is a futile one.#so at the very least it is his declaration that he shall remain even so. he will be waiting‚ for all the eons to come.#and maybe‚ in the end‚ though he does not believe it‚ primus will be merciful.#optimus always was.#kay has a party in the tags#my meta posts#kay can i just catch my breath for a second
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Thinking about:
The two moments in ep 1 (6:08) and ep 2 (32:37) when Jihyun is seen in the background between Jaewon and Tae Hyung/Eun Ji respectively.
The way Jaewon's taller shadow engulfs Jihyun's smaller shadow as Jaewon walks towards Jihyun on the beach in ep 2.
Yoon Won singing on the beach.
Just how fantastic Yoon Won, Ae Ri, and Jihyun's boss are.
How it looks like Jaewon drew himself and his younger brother and maybe a young Jihyun in the landscape of the Han river in ep 4.
The way Jaewon tugs Jihyun into him after putting the rucksack on Jihyun in ep 4 (7:03).
The tale of the country mouse who ran back home (ep 4)...and me wondering if it's foreshadowing a separation and/or time skip in future eps.
Jihyun keeping Jaewon's art in case he becomes famous...and me wondering if that will come back if there's a time skip/separation at the end.
The fact that the therapist is always in the same top, which might indicate that the therapy scenes are all from the same session...maybe meaning everything else that's happening are flashbacks from the time of the session...which ends in ep 5. There are no scenes of the therapy session in ep 6.
The bust on the shelf in the therapists room, with hands over its eyes...
Jihyun's dream of going to the Hanson Tower with a lover and putting a lock up there...and me hoping he'll do that with Jaewon.
The "traffic won't stop for you" sign behind Jaewon as he gets drunk in ep 5 and talks about siblings. If it turns out his brother died because he ran into the road I will throw fists.
The way Jaewon's little brother is dressed in a light blue t-shirt with something cream over the top in the flashback and then Jihyun is also wearing light blue/grey under a cream jacket in the next scene.
Jaewon's "We are always living in other's frameworks in this world". And "Don't try to get out of the box".
The silence as the credits roll at the end of ep 6.
#the eighth sense#the 8th sense#t8s#I don't gif and viki prevents screenshots so all I can do is bounce them around in my brain like a washing machine#I'm not making predictions about ep 6...#well apart from after my second watch I think the beach scene IS real#but from the point of the overhead shot of them lying on the surfboards on the beach#until them surfing again feels like it's in one or both of their imaginations#that's the point where continuity fails for me#so I think they either talk about the possibility of spending the night together#or one of them (maybe jihyun) imagines/daydreams the bed scene#and then they go back into the water where jihyun almost drowns#I think he gets taken to hospital but he's fine#jaewon however will then distance himself from jihyun because he's scared he can't keep him safe#anyway...#I also wonder what trauma jihyun has suffered because he's hinted to it a couple of times#and I don't just mean the water hazing#but we'll see#I can't believe I have to wait SIX more days to find out 😭
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I'm so tired
#not to come on here just to complain and feel sorry for myself especially because i know things are so much worse for so many other ppl#but as hard as i'm trying it's hard to believe things will be okay i'm trying so hard not to fall into defeatist attitudes#but fuck man. fuck. it's not even that i'm surprised or anything it's just. man#i want to curl up in a ball and just be comforted and cry and be upset but i can't do that and i have no one to do that#my worker's comp payments aren't coming through like they're supposed to and i have like ten dollars and barely any food in the apartment#my injuries aren't getting better the pain is still there even though i'm doing everything i'm supposed to#my meds aren't working but meds have NEVER worked on me and i keep hoping and praying some day i'll find one that will but i fear they won'#i have more psych testing in january but a part of me worries about doing it because if (when) i test positive for certain things it will b#on my record and considering..... the state of things i worry about what that means for me and my autonomy esp regarding anything medical#i still can't convince any doctors to take my issues that are almost CERTAINLY endometriosis seriously and again.... given the state of thi#i find it very hard to believe that will change and will in fact only get worse and i will never be able to get any kind of sterilization o#hysterectomy and if something ever ended up happening and i DID get pregnant well. it would not be good for me#i feel very alone and like i need to and must handle everything on my own but i feel like i'm about to break doing that#and then this. this. this this this this. i know it's not fair to be upset about it. like i said things are so much worse for so many other#but fuck dude. fuck man. mentally i have not been doing good recently and nothing has happened in my life to really help that recently#i want to go back to being so repressed i genuinely felt/believed i was emotionless this was not a good year for the dam to break#i told my therapist the other day that i feel like a toddler. i was so repressed and emotionless for as long as i can remember#so i never learned to deal with big ugly and overwhelming emotions. so i react as a child still learning would because i never got the#chance to learn how to manage them and FUCK MAN i feel like i'm losing it#i know it's important to do what you can and not fall into overly negative mindsets but that's not something i was good at anyways#and now it's even harder but i'm trying. fuck dude i'm trying so hard i want to be hopeful i want to do what i can#i don't want to hate everything and jump immediately to wanting to kms or destroying my whole life because what's the point#i just. holy fuck. man i need a minute to breathe and i wish i had someone physically here to hold me and tell me it's okay#but i don't have that so i'll be a big girl and sort myself out like usual and just hope i don't break yet#i'm gonna go watch anime and try and read fic to distract myself but mannnnnnnn i feel like i'm losing it#kaz rambles
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"gabby? baby?" 🥺🤧💔
#*carly catalogs#chicago fire#matt casey#dawsey#I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVE TO GO BACK AND WATCH THIS AGAIN BECAUSE OF MY GOLDFISH MEMORY I'M GONNA BE SICK#boden never leaving matt or gabby's side throughout all this has me in tears too he loves his fire kids so much 🥺😭💗#this just fuels my fire to put lucy in the hospital even more because i would love a parallel like this between him and grey#especially since grey is probably the most fatherly figure to tim out of the group considering they've been working together the longest
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I being so fucking normal about this fit on him rn I'm beingsofuckingnormal I'm beingsofuckin nor-
#you have no idea how fucking long I've been drooling crying begging and just screaming for them to do a Lost boy kill count#like I just watched the podcast maybe like a week ago and I'm just like rocking back and forth on my bed like they're going to post a video#<--real soon#and oh my God I watched the video of the kill count in there's so many things I wish they talked about on there but I'm grateful to get it#they did talk about the sequels and.....ekkkk... I mean it's only based off of high demand so let's hope to God no one talks about it#or send any emails for them I mean if they talk about the remake that's fine I haven't really seen that one I know Sebastian stan is in it#oh my God I feel like I'm about to be so fucking annoying about the movie again I think I'm going to just start posting random shit about it#also lately I've been more happy to be posting and drawing again than usual#so I might be back on doodling and drawing random shit or actually I've been having more confidence in myself to start posting doodles#why do I bring that up because oh I don't know...wink wonk 🤫🤫🤫🤫🤫🤫🤗🤗 😉😉😉😉😜😜😜#my laptop kind of sucks now so I'm going to buy a new one probably this month or next month so I'll be drawing and posting doodles#I'm also thinking about posting some of my recent sketches I have in my notebook but don't expect any Picasso or Vince Van Gogh for me#I know I'm good but like I'm not that good lol im jking kinda sorta maybe not relaly okay yeaj am BUT!!!#I feel like I'm back on my drawing shit again and if I don't finish your drawing I'll just still post it because why the fuck not I'm young#let's fuck around and have some fun why not huh#man I can't believe I'm actually really rambling here but yeah I'm happy to say that I'm going to be back on my stupid shit ❤️#kill count
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