#I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT GET OVER HOW INCREDIBLE BABIES ARE. FUCK MAN

[jnnul]

riding enhypen hc's <3

a/n: entirely self-indulgent filth is at your service! i spiraled & sunoo's is genuinely dangerous. word count: 1.4k genre: nsfw...straight smut.

yang jungwon

freaks out

when you asked him if you could ride him, he freaked out

first, he had to figure out the logistics, then why you wanted to do it in the first place, then - !

you tell him to just stop thinking and let you make him feel good

so when he hesitantly agrees, he's still worried you're somehow going to manage to hurt yourself

until you finally, finally ease yourself down, pausing every so often to get used to his length

and then you bottom out

and jungwon sees heaven

he's too busy trying not to cum like a virgin the second you bottom out to remember why he was so worried in the first place

looking at his expression, you move to lift yourself off of him when his hands find your hips and keep you seated

"don't move. feels good."

you almost laugh at the neanderthal language your boyfriend is using but suddenly, he's guiding your hips forward and you're too shocked to laugh

goddamn. you knew it would feel good for him but not this good

jungwon never tries to control your movements when you have sex but clearly, this was a new experience for him

you like it. a lot.

as you do it more often and jungwon gets more used to it, he likes being a little more dominant by telling you to stop or keep going

mostly because knowing that you like it makes him horny as fuck

lee heeseung

b e g s you to do it

except he manages to do it in a way where you’re convinced that it was your idea in the first place

tries his best to keep his hands to himself

fails every time

kinda like jungwon, his hands always just naturally gravitate towards your hips

loves to control your pace and drag your hips slowly against his

bc he knows how much you hate it

he makes sure to bring you to the edge and rip your pleasure away at the last second

he's a fucking asshole (and you tell him as much) but he just laughs and kisses your tears away

definitely the type to tell you to sit slowly only to knock the wind out of you by thrusting suddenly

loves it when you grab his shoulders, trying to steady yourself

he gets such an ego boost when your thighs are shaking, and your grip on his body is too tight

he likes knowing that he's the single man on earth who could make you feel this good

will 100% kiss your collarbone when you're leaning over him

riding him is fun, teasing but also really romantic when he wants to be

absolutely will not flip you over, even when you get tired

"you're tired? that's alright, baby. we've got all night and nowhere to be."

park jongseong

such a cutie patootie bc he's always thinking abt if you're going through too much trouble

honestly, you would only be able to ride him when he's really tired

or when he's feeling a little down or when you just wanna spoil him

bc he l o v e s it when you ride him but he's always so worried abt you :(

sits against the headboard so that you can have more stability

presses so many kisses against your chest and neck

loves it when you're slow and grinding against him, just enjoying how full he makes you feel

loves it even more when you're riding him like it's the only thing you can think of doing in that moment

absolutely runs his hands up and down your thighs as you wrap your arms around his neck to kiss him

always is kissing you btw

no matter how fucked out you are (or he is, tbh) he's always kissing you bc you're going out of your way to make him feel good

just so incredibly love w you

will absolutely be asking if you want him to flip you over and make you feel good

doesn't believe you when you say that riding him does make you feel good

accidentally leaves bruises on your hips from how hard his grip is on you

kisses every single one of the bruises he leaves because he feels so sorry :(

definitely a groaner and his head falls back when you bottom out

he's such a romantic omg

jake sim

so excited cannot control himself

will beg you to ride him and is not ashamed of it

"yeah and you would too if your s/o was as hot as mine."

is kinda silly abt it because for him, pleasure is the ultimate goal

so even though you're riding him, he will 'accidentally' thrust upwards just to see you gasp

absolutely the type to do goofy shit in the middle to see you lose your breath

gets such an ego boost when you're sweating, trying not to cum before him when he's making it so hard for you

is a rlly sensual person so if the vibe is kinda serious, he will absolutely be pushing your hair back, pressing kisses against your shoulders

prefers you to ride him when the two of you are sitting

like sitting in an armchair or some shit

he feels like he's closer to you and he rlly likes the feeling of you clinging to him (kinda like heeseung)

is super versatile? like he gets turned on by pretty much everything and is into everything

so he can go from having a rlly serious vibe and kissing you senseless while you're seated full of him

to bouncing you on his dick faster than you can even register the switch

gets such a kick of adrenaline when you're fucked thoughtless when you're riding him

especially when you're babbling nonsense about how you don't want to stop and that you're in love w his dick

ABSOLUTELY goes feral for the praise

park sunghoon

one serving of a cocky ass mf when you first suggest it ("LMAOO you like like me")

kinda like jay in that he feels bad at first bc he rlly only lets you do it when he's feeling rlly tired

or when he just wants to be taken care of

since most of the time, he likes it for you to just sit back and relax

when he finally gives in though, he enjoys it to the fullest

absolutely accidentally edges you while he edges himself

everything feels so intense that he just needs you to stop every so often for you to catch your breath

and for him to get his head straight

but his thoughts grow cloudier and cloudier the longer you ride him

eventually, he gives up the reigns to you and that's when the fun really begins

he's such a sweetie when he's so far gone

tries his best to be quiet but just starts babbling when you ride him like it's the only thing you can think of doing

his hands are all over your body, trying to find something to anchor himself to

mark. him. up.

loves feeling special to you and feeling like you'd never give anyone else the chance to make you feel good like this

i wouldn't say that he's subby necessarily but he kinda gives into a more gentle and pliable side of him that you normally don't see

and when he cums, good god praise him so much pls :( he deserves it

kim sunoo

actually the best person to ever ride (i say this from personal experience)

slightly more dominant than usual because he loves seeing you melt when he takes control

snaps his hips up when you least expect it to see you whimper

gets such an ego boost when you lose your strength and fall into his arms

will hold you close to his chest as he fucks into you

kisses you when you're leaning into him

very slow and steady and purposeful with his movements, making you want more when he does the slightest movements

laughs when you nearly pass out after you cum (not in a mean way) (in a slightly mean way)

thinks you're absolutely adorable and likes watching you fumble for a couple moments before he starts guiding you

honestly probably doesn't let you do it very often bc he has to be in a very specific mindset for it

probably only happens when you're feeling RLLY needy

it's also probably just foreplay to him before he flips you over and fucks you until your mind goes absolutely blank

might even get freaky with it

do not get surprised if he ties your hands behind your back with a tie or smth

and tells you to 'get moving' in teasing way

overall, unlocks a side of him that you rarely get but absolutely love every time that you see it

[arlerts-angel]

🖤⛓️🔞| 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐭𝐨𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐯𝐨𝐥. 1: 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐛𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

a/n: welcome to the official first installment of kinktober! today we'll start off with some softcore stuff; headcanons/how our men pleasure themselves; a look into their pants and if they use any assistance to do the deed 😮‍💨

cw: descriptions of male masturbation methods, dick sizes/descriptions, toys mentioned

taglist: @callm3senpaii @la-undercover-latina @dilfkentolover @arlertwitch @nigthmar3moon @darkstarlight82 @daddydynamight @softlilpeachxx @ringsofsaturnnnn @millennialmagicalgirl @i-literally-cant-with-this

🖤 armin arlert:

x-ray: armin's pretty average at about 5 and 1/2 inches! he has more length than girth and curves ever so slightly upwards. he is so smooth, loves to be clean shaven.

method: armin loves to use a small bullet vibrator and stimulate his taint while he masturbates. sometimes he'll go even further if he's feeling brave. it gives him the most intense orgasms (besides his partner) and usually makes him a noisy, whiny mess. when armin cums, he cums in his hand for relatively easy cleanup.

assistance: armin doesn't care to watch porn but he will look at pictures you send him or watch videos of the two of you fucking.

🖤 eren jaeger:

x-ray: eren packs a nice 7 inch cock, and it's thick too. his pubes are the same shade as his hair and are trimmed neatly, doesn't mind letting them be wild sometimes, though.

method: eren likes to edge himself. he likes to take his time when he masturbates, so he'll stroke his cock and get incredibly close to cumming and just stop, leaving his cock red and throbbing. eventually he'll spill his cum over his tummy once he's had enough.

assistance: eren watches porn frequently, less when in a relationship or not at all if his partner isn't comfortable with it. he loves to watch girl on girl porn or dick riding videos.

🖤 levi ackerman:

x-ray: mans has the thickest, juiciest cock ever and you cannot tell me otherwise. length wise he's slightly above average, close to 6 inches.

method: every now and then, levi will use a cock ring when he jerks off. he loves how hard it makes his cock and allows him to last longer during his jerk off sessions. levi has a designated cum rag that he uses to finish in so as to not make a mess.

assistance: levi absolutely does not watch porn. he knows it's completely unrealistic and thus does not add any fuel to his fire. he prefers to use his imagination.

🖤 jean kirstein:

x-ray: well, let's just say he's got a cock that matches his face ;) homeboy is packing heat. a solid 8 inches, all length.

method: jean likes to use his non-dominant hand to jerk off. he turns his hand so that it slides down his cock forefinger first. he'll twist his hand ever so slightly, as if someone else was stroking his dick for him. jean does the deed in the shower, so he lets his cum spurt out against the shower wall and down the drain.

assistance: jean likes to use pictures or videos you send him, much like armin does. he will occasionally watch porn if he feels compelled to.

🖤 connie springer:

x-ray: connie has an average size, maybe slightly below average penis. but what he lacks in length he makes up for in width, and wit.

method: connie likes to play with his balls when he masturbates. he'll twirl them around between his fingers or pull them up and down rhythmically as he jerks his cock. connie cums into tissues, though they're not the most effective at actually catching the spurts.

assistance: connie always has SOMEONE in his phone willing to send nudes to him, relationship status be damned. single? he's got hoes. taken? he'll happily ask for nudes from his pretty baby. he loves to watch amateur porn too.

🖤 reiner braun

x-ray: do i even have to say it... HIS COCK IS MASSIVE. reiner is big and beefy in all the right places. i'm talking porn star cock. 10 inches and it's thick.

method: reiner uses lots of lube. he's big and girthy so he needs a little extra sum sum to get him there. he also likes to jerk it in the shower every now and then, but if he's not in the shower he's definitely in the bedroom, cumming buckets into your bra or panties.

assistance: reiner loves to have phone sex. there's something steamy about only hearing you moan and talk dirty without seeing you touch yourself.

🖤 bertholdt hoover

x-ray: this man is the definition of pencil dick and i mean it in the nicest way possible. his cock is as tall and thin as he is, and he knows how to use it.

method: bertholdt doesn't use any special toys or lubes. he'll either spit in his hand and jerk it or use some lotion if he happens to be near some. he usually saves his jerk off sessions for late nights, so he finds an old shirt or sock to cum into.

assistance: i cannot explain it, but bertholdt gives me the vibe that he saves every nude he's ever been sent and uses those to help him jerk off. also has a thing for revenge porn.

[nepenthe-den]

There's no force on this planet that can convince me that Fin doesn't have

A.) A praise kink (giving and receiving)

B.) a breeding kink (Lord have mercy)

And C.) at least a mild size kink.

UGGHH YOURE SO RIGHT QUEEN these are all so painfully trueee

MDNI under the cut!!

Praise kink?

We see how much people compare this man to a dog. Call him a good boy and he's going to fall to his knees. But he also loves to praise his partner and let them know how amazing he thinks they are in any situation. He never shuts up!!

On the receiving end, quite literally anything will make him melt. He LOVES a good mix of you telling him how good of a boy he is while you tug on his hair. Call him handsome and strong and brave and he's mush.

On the giving end, he's always telling you how perfect you are. Even when he's beyond fucked out he's mumbling "f-fuck fuck so good- you're so good so fucking perfect-" he physically cannot stop praising you. He needs you to know how much he loves you.

BREEDING KINK??? ARGHHH don't even get me STARTEDDD

While I think Hazard would be good with kids, I highly doubt he wants them. At least anytime soon. He lives a wild life and definitely has doubts because of his own parents and difficult home life as a kid.

But boy does he still love to try! He fucks you over and over after he gets just a glimpse of his cum dripping out of you. It drives him absolutely insane. Makes him feel almost possessive and incredibly confident. Ugh and if you beg him to cum inside you? Huge ego boost! His pretty baby wants him to fill them up? Done and done.

Size kink 😮‍💨

Don't know how tall he is canonically but in my brain he's at LEAST 6'5. And oh BOY does he have a size kink. Literally just standing next to you and looking down at you has him blushing and ... thinking. If you wear his shirt? He's a dead man walking. When you sit on his lap? He's at a loss for words.

Im also a firm believer that his cock is huge. So he takes his sweet time prepping you beforehand. His fingers are big and thick too 🤭 he has you whining and on the verge of tears before he's actually fucked you. It's a tight fit when he actually gets his dick inside you, genuinely drives him mad. He's got you clawing at and scraping his shoulders. He just completely covers you when he's on top. 😮‍💨 His back muscles are tensing from how deliciously tight you are.

I'm in the process of writing a short with all of these so stay tuned!!

[crescenthistory]

in one of your posts you mentioned barty giving a best man speech at r and regulus’ wedding, it’d be nice to see your take on the full speech or like a wedding oneshot? love your work btw i adore how you characterise barty

are you taking emoji anons? id love ✂️

hey there babes<333 you can absolutely be ✂️ if you want to tell me your age and pronouns i’ll add you to the list 🫶 and thank you, i love and miss barty as well

unfortunately i don’t think i’d be the person to write a full length wedding fic 🥲 it’s just not my vibe. i might write blurbs referencing it, bring it up in fics (like with the fifth and sixth wheel series) or write out some funny dialogue i think i’d see, but beyond that weddings are so intricate and personal that i’d struggle getting it in a reader insert format

however, i present to you some random thoughts:

when i write reg x reader, i always imagine barty as trying to be both reader’s man of honour and reg’s best man lol

like he would CAMPAIGN to get to be both. and he’d likely win

i fear you’d have to share him and then have one more for each that’s just yours (for slytherin!reader i picture you have dorcas and he has evan or pandora) (potentially, reg has sirius and you have remus)

barty would by far be the most chaotic in the wedding party, but i believe he brings the kind of chaos those friend groups need to get through something as hectic as a wedding

he would have the “go, go, go!” attitude and the nerve to say “shut the fuck up” when needed

and you best believe that if anyone else cause drama, he’d be at their NECK. he threatens sirius from start to end of the wedding, even though he is on his best behaviour and super happy for his baby brother (fighting with him is just instinct for barty)

most of the black family were not invited and barty places evan at the door to ensure they do NOT try to sneak their way in. if they do, well then barty gets an opportunity to let out some steam

i can picture barty taking on an almost bridezilla persona as the best man to take some of the heat and stress off of you and reggie — he is the bad guy so you don’t have to

if you do end up having some kind of meltdown over the planning, his energy would switch up sooo fast and he would be the most caring, gentle creatures, cooing and cradling you while snapping at whoever’s closest to go get reggie

as for speeches, i think barty and sirius make the two “main” speeches, while dorcas makes a small toast and pandora recites a poem

i just knowwwww barty’s speech would have people so torn between cackling with laughter and tearing up — truly, they get whiplash, every other sentence is hilarious and heartwarming

(barty is seemingly none the wiser that people have to catch their breaths from the energy changes)

“i didn’t expect junior to make me so emotional”

he has known you and reg since first year, so he tells alllllllllllll the stories; the good, the bad, the pining and the embarrassing

i don’t want to talk about sirius’ speech because he’d definitely say he was incredibly proud of regulus and happy he has found love, and i cannot take that

it wouldn’t be the biggest wedding, just the people you truly considered family; it was perfect

[steddieunderdogfics]

This week’s writer spotlight feature is: Wormdebut! Wormdebut has published 18 fics on AO3 all in the steddie tag!

@thefreakandthehair recommends the following works by @wormdebut:

Tell Eddie He Looks Sexy With His Hair Pushed Back

Kiss Your Knuckles (Before You Punch Me In The Face)

Hell Bent For Leather

All You Have Is Your Fire

It Feels Like Fourteen Carats But No Clarity (When I Look At The Man Who Would Be King)

Worm is incredible! For a humble worm, they sure know how to write fanfiction. ;) But seriously, Worm has a way of exploring different dynamics in such depth with an immense amount of care that's so obvious in the finish products! -- @thefreakandthehair

Below the cut, Wormdebut answered some questions about their writing process and some of their recommended work!

Why do you write Steddie?

These two idiots inspire me. I mean look at them. I think the thing I love about Steve and Eddie is that to me they are destined to be together. Post-Canon, Alternate Universe. It doesn’t matter. They are meant to be together in any scenario. I could and will write about these two forever.

What’s your favorite trope to READ?

Rockstar Eddie, baby. I love some good sex, drugs and rock and roll.

What’s your favorite trope to WRITE?

Is safe (mostly)sane and consensual BDSM a trope? I like to write that. 😂

What’s your favorite Steddie fic?

Tuesday’s Gone With The Wind - Thisapplepielife there is nothing quite like reading this for the first time. I truly thought I was going to explode as it was being updated.

Is there a trope you’re excited to explore in a future work but haven’t yet?

Omegaverse! I have a fic in the worm vault that will come out eventually. Wormegaverse. It’s coming. I’m fucking stoked for it.

What is your writing process like?

Hoooboy. It’s a mess. I cannot write an outline to save my life. (I’m looking at you King of Hell Eddie fic. I know you need an outline okay?) I tend to write in order, but if I get stuck I will skip a scene or two ahead so I can figure out how to squish two pieces of a story together OR I will write little notes about my intentions and skip it and come back. (My favorite note of all time is when I wrote “spit kink shit.” So I could remember my very pure intentions)

Do you have any writing quirks?

Boy do I! I tend to go into like writing fugue states where I will just bust out thousands of words in a sitting and if I am not doing that I am thinking and over thinking about when im gonna fugue out again. I also get really stressed when it actually comes time to write a sex scene? Weird, I know. But every single one is super important to me and I want to make sure they read well. My friends can attest that I am an absolute basket case when it comes to me writing Steve and Eddie getting down and dirty.

Do you prefer posting when you’ve finished writing or on a schedule?

God when I’m done. I am NOT great at posting chaptered fics but I am trying to get better with it? I prefer writing larger pieces though. I am an over-thinker to a fault and for some reason I stress less with one-shots.

Which fic are you most proud of?

It’s gotta be Kiss Your Knuckles. That fic is everything to me. But my Boys Who Kiss series is also so fucking important to me. Those two have so much more to tell y’all and I can’t wait to share their lives with you. I’m a musician so any of my fics that are heavily laced with performance and song are very special.

How did you get the idea for Kiss Your Knuckles (Before You Punch Me In The Face)?

I remember listening to Twin Size Mattress one day and I was like—Holy Shit, this is so Steddie-Coded it hurts. And it’s post-canon AND Rockstar Eddie? Incredible. The words just screamed Eddie Behavior and I knew Steve had to write a one-hit wonder about how he felt.

When writing Kiss Your Knuckles (Before You Punch Me In The Face), what was something you didn’t expect?

Oh I sobbed when I finished it. I couldn’t believe that I had actually finished it. It truly means the world to me and I wanted to share it with you all so badly. I cried for like an hour.

What inspired It Feels Like Fourteen Carats But No Clarity (When I Look At The Man Who Would Be King)?

Honestly? Tumblr user @ghosttotheparty had made a post about the scenario that Fourteen Carats is about and I messaged them and was like hey listen I want to take a shot at this, if that’s okay. Fourteen Carats is the first fully formed fic that I have ever posted aside from tumblr Drabbles and while I personally don’t love it I keep it up just in case someone somewhere does. 😂

What was your favorite part to write from All You Have Is Your Fire?

OH. Absolutely just eluding to Tattoo Legend and Icon, Jim Hopper. God he so fucking hot neat.

How do/did you feel writing Tell Eddie He Looks Sexy With His Hair Pushed Back?

I felt some type of a way, clearly. I think this is my favorite Eddie that I have ever written (My favorite Steve is Kiss Your Knuckles Steve) and he just kept getting more and more interesting. Like who the hell fucks you and speaks French while they do it? Tell Eddie Eddie does. And thank god for that guy.

What was the most difficult part of writing Hellbent For Leather?

Writing sub/bottom Eddie! I did this fic as a gift for tumblr user @gorgeousgreymatter-x (love you bitch) and it was hard because I don’t often write that dynamic, but god damn I loved these two Steddies.

Do you have a favorite scene and/or line from any of your fics?

Ah— “It is, and I do.” Something about French chef Eddie, really—yeah. I am proud of everything I have written but if I can be honest with you I rarely remember what I have done. I often joke that it’s simply Steve and Eddie in my brain just writing what they want, because people will quote my work or talk to me about a scene and I’m like—‘I wrote that?? Nice.’

Do you have any upcoming projects or fics you’d like to share/promote?

WELL. Once I can break myself out of this accidental hiatus I am so excited to share more of For Your Entertainment with yall. I am also so fucking excited to share King Of Hell Eddie with the world. I can’t fucking wait. I am working on a ‘Came Back Wrong’ fic that is less scary and more comedic and I am stoked for that. I have quite a few things that are happening and I am just so fucking excited to share them all with you. 

Outside of these questions, Is there anything YOU would like to add?

Just thank you. Thank you for reading and thanks for letting me be a part of all of this. I have not felt this inspired and loved in a long fucking time and I’m not going anywhere so I hope yall will stick around for the wild ride. Fucking love you.

Thank you to our author, Wormdebut, and our nominator, @thefreakandthehair! See more of Wormdebut's works featured on our page throughout the day!

Writer’s Spotlight is every Wednesday! Want to nominate an author? You can nominate them here!

[landoscaring]

my thoughts after baku

was debating whether to post my usual post-race commentary/ramblings because today's race was perfect and i mostly have used this space to throw polite shade at mclaren orrrr toxic/incorrect perceptions from fans, but i feel like it's necessary because, in no particular order:

1. oh my fucking god, what a race we got treated to today! oscar's driving was spectacular, it took balls to do what he did and to defend his position from charles (who also drove an amazing race) for what, 2/3 parts of the race? this kid is my goat, i've always known

2. watching today's race was extremely anxiety-inducing. i think charles chased oscar with drs enabled for like, at least 30 laps? and every time they got to the straight i prayed and yelled and cried and laughed maniacally every time oscar managed to block him and speed off. wow. i cannot believe we got to witness that masterclass from oscar.

3. LANDO FUCKING NORRIS, man. i have no words for him except that i truly think he may be the driver of his generation. what he did, covering oscar from checo??? absolutely divine. and like, yeah, i know he had his own reasons to do that, but he could've still said, nah, fuck it? i love his team spirit. and jesus christ did he shut everyone up today with his overtakes, his tyre management, and his overall pace. my goat!!!!!

4. we didn't get the strategy we thought (and feared) we'd get, but that's a) extremely poetic in a "ha! second driver whooo?" way, and b) confirmation that mclaren can in fact pull off a competitive race strategy without fucking over either lando or oscar. they both achieved the best possible result today given the circumstances: oscar with a win ahead of charles and max (important for lando's wdc) and red bull (important for the wcc) and lando moving up from P15 to P4 andddd ending up above max. incredible performance all around.

5. who knows what'll happen next, but i think today's win has a huge psychological impact on oscar's mindset for the remaining races. he got his 2nd win after a highly questioned maiden one on merit alone. if things go the way we all thought they would this weekend with lando at the front fighting for points, i think it'll be easier for oscar to help out. kind of like he took the edge off (not that he's going to stop fighting for a win, but i think today he proved to everyone something he'd been quietly building up to).

6. i know there's quite a bit of PR in the post-race interviews and team debrief and the team celebration... but i don't care because i'm a sucker for those. lando spraying oscar with champagne? andrea hugging him and kissing lando's head? lando talking about how deserved the win is? the "let's go, baby"????? i died.

7. the whole checo and sainz thing was so, soooo unnecessary. i'm glad they made it out okay.

8. WILLIAMS???????????? i see you, and i like what i see. very extremely happy for alex, and also of course for franco!

onto singapore, pals. we'll see what our papaya boys can do 🧡😭

[nachofuck3r]

ᴊᴏʜɴɴʏ ᴄᴀɢᴇ x ɢɴ!ᴘʟᴀʏᴇʀ/ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ʜᴇᴀᴅᴄᴀɴᴏɴꜱ

After a high I flood of demand we are gonna have some of Johnny Cage x Player headcanons!! Because everyone is loved by him, shut up! He loves the player?!!!

CW: meantions of you having a dick (it could also be a strap), lotta dirty talk, mentions of breeding, daddykink, slight degradation. the nsfw section is devided into 4 different categories, Johnny being dom/sub Bottom/Top, so everyone is provided for.

SFW:

First of all I do really hope you are looking for needy, because in game Johnny is so very needy and desperate for you and your attention. He'll do absolutely anything to grab it and impress you. He's already an attention whore when he's not trying to rizz you up. But with you he doubles down, tries legit everything from sweet to sultry.

No touching, means double the verbal affection, so so much flirting. There is not one taunt he doesn't do for you.

"I'm packing more than a punch, baby" "How do I look from behind?'' "Your smile, is my fatality" "What if, next time, you finish me?"

At first you are freaked out and taken aback, when it comes to your attention, that Johnny shouldn't be doing marriage proposals, in the middle of a match. You're game must be bugged in some very weird and fanservice providing way.

If you indulge his advances, by flirting back or taunting him. He's freak! There is no way the sexy person controlling him is also flirting with him?! Over the moon, that's him right then.

But if you don't or actively reject his flirting, he will suspect you are playing hard to get. So he'll most likely double down and get more risque with his propositions.

"You're like, super tiny, man" "I'm not tiny, I'm in a game, but I can, 100% guaranteed, still rock your world"

Banter becomes a regular occurrence, with you all the while, improving your gaming skills and him mostly just longingly staring at you and trying to impress you with taunts, brutalities and special attacks.

"Why didn't you do the fatality?!" "Because you already performed one this round" "what- "On my heart"

Groan

If you get easily flustered and don't like the flirting, DONT change this mans skin/clothes. The teasing will be endless.

"You like dressing me up, baby?" "Stop calling me that I'm a grown person..." "You're right I should be calling you my spouse"

"Are you looking at my ass?" "No, I'm just checking- uhh" "Just admit you want me, it'll make everything so much easier."

Also don't stop maining him. He'll survive if you play other characters but if you do it long term and the come back to him, he'll be twice as needy, a little pissy and a lot more desperate.

"Is it something I did?" "No, I just wanted to play someone else" "So it was something I did?" "What does that farm boy have that I don't?" "A hat" "Not if you dress me up as Illinois"

At first his very obvious, overly flirty self annoyed you incredibly.

Yes he's sexy and he's also technically single.

But he's also in a game so?? What is a guy gonna do.

This is what a guy is gonna do.

NSFW:

Subby Top:

If you like your men whiny but also want them to wreck you, talk about convenient. Johnny is 100% the provider for your needs. Will not stop whimpering and whining outside of sex but when it gets heated. He cannot stop.

"Please, I need to be inside you so bad" "Fuck I just wanna breed you, want to see you so full, please" "I wish you could ride my face, I need you so badly"

Since he's kinda well INGAME, you two find other ways to be intimate, if its just masturbating, you playing with toys mostly.

SUCK HIM OFF! Or well pretend to, seeing you suck on a toy. Boom man is combusted and on the floor. There is nothing he would love more than paint your face with his fuck-juice.

Seeing you ride a dildo will absolutely kill this man, he'll be a needy mess through out every other match he has the same day.

"Sorry, I couldn't stop thinking about you riding my dic-" "Johnny I swear to every god available"

Subby Bottom:

If the thought, of Johnny being inside you isn't your speed, that's fine! He's a flexible and very versatile man. Plus let's be real, he does this stuff anyway. No way, this man hasn't fucked his own ass.

Subspace Johnny is a fucking mess, just picture him endlessly fingering his own hole, very sloppily.

"If only these fingers were your dick!" "I wish you could spurt inside me, I need you so much baby" "Gods, I need that cock in me or else I'll die"

Dramatic as fuck, but these sentences are just scares throughout the fingering. He'll mostly just be a whimpering mess. So it's very likely you'll have to provide the teasing and dirty talk this time around.

The sound of your voice, taunting him, while fucking his own ass, will make him squirt. Makes a mess of his own mansion floor.

"We should do this before every match!" "Be real- ugh as real as can be, you wouldn't win a single match after something like this..."

Dom Bottom:

This is essentielly the cocky and less whiny version of sub bottom.

You can expect so much taunting from this man, especially when he's pounding his own hole. Will not stop god damned talking.

"If there's a way for me to get out of here, the first thing I'll do if ride your fat dick." "Just thinking about your dick makes me cum" "That's a good boy/girl, stroke that dick thinking about my tight ass"

My guy prays every night, that he can become real and actually just absolutely destroy himself on your dick.

"Are you okay? That's the second match you lost today?" "Sorry, I did not get much rest"

Dom Top:

This is kinda the end boss of Johnny Cages sex life, this is just a part of him. This'll happen eventually, of course only if you want to. But being a dominant top is probably something he'll have to do every once in a while.

"I'm gonna fill this tight litte hole with my seed" "You're such a needy whore for me, for your Daddy" "I'm gonna paint your insides so fucking white, flooding you full of me" "You look so good sucking my dick baby, it's like this is what you were made to do"

Of course it's all pretend, it's just you needily fucking yourself in front of a screen. But both you and a man can dream that he is absolutely destroying your hole with his fat dick.

If you have a pussy he'll ask you to slap it, 100% wants to slap your cunt to get it sensitive. It's also like his favorite thing if you can squirt, he wants that all over him, making you squirt is like his main goal (if it's possible). So he'll often have you fingering yourself into an absolute mess.

"One more baby I feel like this is the one"

If you have a dick, he'll want it super sensitive. Will make you fuck your own fist for hours on end, even if you're spent. Bro wants to see you massage your own balls. He gets so excited thinking about you spurting all over your own stomach. Looking so needy and desperate for him.

"Come on, baby. Make a mess of yourself for daddy"

Little plus here for my T-Dick people.

He adores your dick. He'll ask you to show it to him every time you two get intimate. Wants to see you stroke it and finger yourself (only if you're comfortable), he loves how stiff it can get. Wants to get his mouth on it so bad.

"I want to suck you off so bad. Wish I could frot our dicks together, baby"

[a-roguish-gambit]

Hi there I love your design for a Romy fankid, she is so cute!!! I was wondering do you have any headcanons about Rogue's pregnancy with her? I bet Gambit was the most ecstatic father to be ever!! Anyways that's all I wanted to ask. Love your blog :)

Oh yesssss well it goes in few directions

One if she has control of her powers, and two if she hasn't.

#1 If she has control of her powers:

Girl has been touch starved for years. Once she can touch people she cannot keep her hands off of Gambit. It's only a matter of time till she gets pregnant.

When she does, the mutant morning sickness is NASTY

She's having weird bouts of powers she's previously absorbed. Just split seconds of them after sudden nausea.

Girl is terrified she has lost control of her powers again some how goes straight to Hank.

After assurance that she's just pregnant she's now nervous how Gambit will react

They weren't planning for kids after all. What if he doesn't want it? He seems like the child free type of guy

He's overjoyed tho. Lifts her up and swings her around

Cooks her all kinds of BS. Pulls out the old family cookbooks, steals a few old family cook books from the assassin's guild, sweet talks some old church ladies into giving up their secret recipes.

Makes her non alcoholic banana foster and versions of their favorite fruity drinks

Baby shower is incredibly extravagant and weirdly themed like a casino. Cause he thought it would be fun

There is no gender reveal party but Remy does take bets on the birth gender at the shower. Cause he is a gambling man. Options are: doctor will say girl and be right, doctor will say boy and be right, doctor is wrong about the gender, doctor mentions any obvious mutant traits before the gender (winner gets to pummel doctor for this)

He's not over bearing or super protective. She's still rogue she can handle things herself

He will spoil the fuck out of her tho. Relentlessly.

Instead of pink or blue they go for royal purple for the baby's room.

He handles her mood swings ok. To him it's just rogue but more

Gambit talks to the baby in her belly often pretends to have conversations

Remy talks to the baby bump in Cajun french. Wants the kid to be bi lingual

He comes up with ridiculous nicknames for the baby which last beyond the birth despite rogue's best efforts to stop him

Rogue dealing with worries about being a good mom considering her history with moms, biological and adoptive

Gambit fucking adores how her body has changed. Absolutely worshiping her at times. She's so confused. "Ah feel like a potbelly pig and you think this is sexy? Ah always knew you were a strange man Remy...."

Gambit Will fight any doctor that tries to refuse to take her. So will rogue even while currently in labor

Gambit accepted from the start his hand was gonna get broken in that ER and takes a shot of whiskey and marches in there like a man when it's time to push.

Rogue cries when the baby is born. Refuses to let anyone hold her for a while, clutches her close

#2 Rogue can't control her powers but gets pregnant anyways

Rogue and Gambit still have sexy times but with lots of body cover and condoms obviously.

The condom broke at some point not enough to cause skin to skin contact but enough to let stuff through

Neither of them realize that she gets pregnant from this for a few months

They didn't think she could she thought she'd essentially just miscarry cause of her powers

When she finds out she panics. Gambit is excited but she's so worried she's gonna kill her own baby on accident

Which Gambit knows that much worry will absolutely cause a miscarriage

So his goal is: keep her lowkey as possible

House husband mode engaged.

Rogue is acting reckless for a bit. Sure she's gonna miscarry or it's just gonna disappear one day. Pushing to keep fighting and working like normal. Refusing to plan for the baby to come. Gambit catches her trying to drink coffee and take Tylenol to deal with nausea

They have an argument. Gambit finally says "Does rogue actually want dis bebe? Just be honest wit Gambit. I will understand!"

She breaks down. Admits she wants it but doesn't want to get her hopes up.

"my powers can only destroy things it's only a matter of time before this poor thing suffers the consequences"

He calms her down "you don know dat, chere. Da bebe has survived dis long...mebbe dey Gon be fine cause dey part of you?"

"what about after they're born huh? What if I can't hug my child without hurting them remy? What kind of mother will I be if I can't nurse, I can't kiss my child's forehead, can't hold them close."

"you'd still be a good mama. Cause you already worrying so much bout dem. We'd find a way to make sure our baby knows how much you love dem."

This calms her down

he convinces her to get an ultrasound the next day and she tears up when she sees the little thing, moving around she renews hope.

She's celebrating every little milestone.

Some nights staying up late talking to her baby in her belly

"I may not be the best mama....I'm sorry if I can't hold you as close as some can their own....but I will love you no less. No matter how you come out."

They pick out special mittens for rogue to hold their baby. Get a breast pump so she can still give milk. All just in case.

When she gives birth Gambit is there with a falconry glove. He knows his hand is still gonna be broken but she needs to still be able to touch it.

When the baby is finally born a nurse hands her to rogue cause she doesn't know her powers

She shrieks at first as her skin touches hers....but as skin touches skin nothing happens

She cries in relief as she's able to hold her baby, nuzzle her close

3# she can't control her powers and She can't get pregnant because of her powers....but they have a forge to solve this problem

Gambit and rogue want to have a baby but don't think they can have one

They go to forge and Hank for advice cause a human fertility clinic would be no use

The two have come up with a perfect solution: an artificial womb. It still needs to be surgically attached for blood flow between parent and child and delivering nutrients but it can be attached to any person, female or male or non sex individual.

Gambit volunteers to carry

Rogue is concerned for him thinks he lost his mind but he insists

It's attached to his belly and grows as the baby needs space with a set due date. It's heavy already to start with, and is just gonna get worse

Has to be on a strict diet to make sure the kid is getting good nutrition. Also hormones have to be introduced daily to the amniotic fluid For the baby's sake. Thankfully don't affect him too much

But he does get some mood swings as a result and tiredness.

And his back hates him.

But it's worth it for the baby.

The worst part is not being able to drink

mardigras is the WORST this time round

Calls himself the world's saddest king cake

"da tings Gambit do for ya feve"

Also yes his nickname for the baby while in the incubator is "feve" cause it looked like a bean when they first saw it on scans.

He's slightly upset about being left behind on missions for a while until he realizes it means he can be lazy with his cats

Rogue is concerned at first. Feel this is all a bit uncanny, but loves being able to cuddle the baby belly and gets used to it quickly

He's constantly talking to the belly like he's having convos with the baby. States the baby's "arguments to things" (really his)

Rogue feels a little insecure about not being the one to carry at first. Like she doesn't deserve to be called mom but over time gets used to it.

They have a heart to heart about it

Starts joking that Shes the dad and he's the mom.

The birth is easy, chamber gets opened and baby pops out like a literal bun in the oven. but the womb has to be surgecally removed after wards.

Daddy has to recover but he gets cuddle time with baby first.

Also rogue can touch her baby still in this one

Aaaaaaand that's it!!!!

[dystopyx-blog]

It’s moth time baby

Ivo the Io moth.

He’s the delusional archetype. Funnily enough, he is the most sane, rational, and normal one of the group. So excuuuuuse me, princess if he assumes that he’s the one you’re dating! hes just a sane, rational being, and you’re his exhausted partner (exhausted cuz you have to deal with the other freaks)

Another weird delusion is he treats the other moth men like they’re your kids?? You’ll tell the others to knock it off/stop fighting and he’ll come in like “listen to your mother.’ And everyone’s just “???” I imagine business casual attire, medium length hair pulled over one shoulder idk how to describe it…

Appearance: Pretty tall, Kuu and Atlas are just fuckin freaks /hj. 5’9 As I mentioned I have a specific hairstyle in mind but ajsjdhdudnududdi idk man. Wears a simple pale yellow dress shirt, his wings draped behind him. The biggest/fluffiest antenna of all the bois. Soft, kind eyes. Fluff around neck, arms, and legs.

Okay so does anyone know the “sex-crazed moths” meme?

Because my obsessive moth i inspired by that.

Kuu the Luna Moth

the poplar hawk moth is the one associated with that particular meme But I’m using the Lunar moth for my obsessive boyo because fuckin look at it. Luna moths, like the poplar hawk and most other large moths, have no mouth and cannot eat or drink. They fuck then die. My boy Kuu has a moth, but that doesn’t make him any less desperate to get with you. He is the prettiest fuckin boy. And he is so so so fuckin desperate for you. He’s also fuckin pathetic. Pretty boy who’d [REDACTED my blog is all ages!!] if you so much as touch him istg With the other boys he’s an egotistical sassy drama queen but with you he’s just desperate lmao

Appearance: Tall and thin. 5’11 Loooooong white/pale green hair trailing all the way down his back. Man exclusively wears robes and kimonos and the like. Handsome man. PRETTY BOY.

Ash the Cinnabar Moth

Okay actually I’m unsure of possessive I want a bigger moth but also I kinda wanna go with cinnabar moth? Edgy boi who feels entitled to you. Gets into the most fights. Possessive but also kind of tsundere. He is smaller than most of the others, arguably a lot simpler looking too, but he has a BIG personality. His name is Ash.

Appearance: Second smallest. 5’6. Least fluffy. Black hair with a red highlight, black antena. Red pants, black boots. Red bandana on neck. Black leather jacket with red accents. Piercings. Rounded sunglasses. And cinnabar wings ofc.

Atlas the… well, Atlas Moth

heheheheheh i am very basic when it comes to protective type yanderes and i refuse to branch out 🫵🫵🫵 My protective guy is a biiiiiiig big big man, big softy, big teddy bear. Who will hammer someone’s head with his bare fist if they hurt you!!! Wraps you up in massive, soft wings 🥺 He just stands behind you… menacingly (to anyone else, as soon as you turn to look at him he’s all smiles!) So what better than the atlas moth? And Atlas is already a perfect name, so Atlas!

ATLAS: BIIIIIIIG BOY BIG. 6’1 Dorito shaped tbh. Wears flannel but the flannel is the pattern of the moth teehee. Brown pants. Work boots. Gloves probably idk. I think for hair hmmmm braided? Man bun? I dunno!!!

Roman the Rosy Maple Moth!

Finally We have our Manipulator. His name is Roman, but darling pleeeease call him Maple 🥺 The rosy maple moth. He’s just a lil guy! He’s baby! But oooo he’s schemin and plottin. With you he’s just baby, just an absolute delight, and so fuckin cute and fluffy. How could you possibly say no to this soft boy?! But he will tear another’s throat out. He will lie and corrupt and manipulate. He’s secretly incredibly rude, vulgar, and sassy. But with you he’s a perfect angel <3

Appearance: the smallest. Like 5’3. Fluffy yellow and pink hair, bog soft yellow attend, big precious puppy dog eyes. Massive fuckin yellow hoodie that is SUPER fuckin fluffy, with pink sleeves. Smallish pink n yellow wings. The hoodie goes down to like just above his knees. Pink leggings and pink calf high converse.

[journalsouppe]

Many... many months late but here's my Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations spread!! What a fun ending to the original trilogy, I truly fall in love more and more with Ace Attorney with each installment I play.

Phoenix stickers are by Peachcott! Be Gay Solve Crimes is by Ozlisky!

Writing typed below!

Rating: 9.5 Played: Sp 2023 Port: Nintendo Switch Favorite? Y Replayable? Y Recommend? Y Series: Ace Attorney

Comments:

P for Penis

MIA POV LETS GO

Payne's hair is almost as bad as gossip's lip

Feenie is so cute and pathetic

FEENIE'S POUTY FACE

i absolutely love 3-1 it is such a good opening case

is the disbarment message foreshadowing...

omg Ron's sprites are really cute

YOU ATE IT???

i genuinely can't tell if Ron is guilty or not...

front facing Phoenix jumpscare

Adrian!!! She's doing well!!!

he said!! he said the name of the game!!!

omg i see the Godot/Barok resemblance

not the badgers in handcuffs (skull emoji)

is the red diamond desiree and ron is protecting her??

obsessed that Phoenix's first thought after finding out about Gumshoe's crush is to gossip with maya

who was that goth lady??

obsessed with godot

love the sax in godot's theme

phoenix is so shocked and speechless from the coffee LMAO

godot caught each seed with his mouth??

don tigre is SO red

Gumshoe x maggey is so cute

PUT THE JUDGE ON THE STAND!

she bit the badge (skull emoji)

mia is in a courtroom full of bozos

not the mormon beard judge

"YOU CAN'T JUST 'OOPS' YOUR WAY OUT OF THIS!'

diego zoo wee mama

BRATWORTH!!

"poor baby... the court record seems to have wet itself" insane thing to say

i think mia is officially my favorite

crazy 3-4 ending

omg i'm edgy

i don't like how maya is treating Nick in 3-5 :/

i'm going to punch bratworth

LOVE EDGEYS MUSIC PEARL IS STILL MISSING??

LOVE edgey vs fran

the building convo is giving me terrible flash backs

GO BACK TO THE HOSPITAL NICK

love my silly girl gumshoe idk if kitten or princess is worse

3 DAUGHTERS?

morgan is so fucked up

dahlia is in maya's body... right?

go off pearls!!

when did pearl/mia get here T_T

a man??

EXECUTED?

THE SETUP IS SO CRAZY

everytime edgeworth opens his mouth the more im confident he's a gay man lmao

girl boss mia fey

Summary

THIS GAME WAS SO FUCKING GOOD. The setup throughout the whole trilogy was great, especially all within Trials and Tribulations. I love how bits and pieces of each case(or even large portions) had a ton of relevance to the final case. The characters were amazing and had great development, I loved playing as Mia and Edgeworth, that was such a delight, and im so glad we got to battle it out against Franziska as edgeworth. I love the other 2 games but the cohesiveness of the entire story within this game was spectacular. It truly reminded me of DGS 1&2 and why i love it so much. I really love how we also got to see young feenie, bratworth, and mia, the dialogue was especially entertaining. I cannot get over the twists and turns of the last case. I could never have predicted what was going to happen. I love complex mysteries like this, they're so entertaining but also im constantly thinking 'how do you even plan this all out?' The narumitsu in this game is so perfect too... omg. Incredible game , I absolutely loved it!

[ask-the-royal-absol]

👌 perhaps… 🥺 I love your blogs! You always have the best facial expressions for your characters and your interactions and plots are so like fascinating aa! Also Destino is so… Destino but I love them… i bet they could make Vekpa cry if they really went at him hah. one day. I will stop being a shy weenie and try to send my guys to interact with your characters maybe fjjwiekkdk. Also fellow rat Lover Yes 🧡

(No, you cannot come in here with positivity for me! How dare!!! That is not how this work! Thank you ASDFGHJKL It means a lot

Ok, sometimes in your life you get those people who you think are just really cool and seem like a genuinely awesome person to hang around with? That's you. Your that cool person with the cool blogs that are just cool. So, I first followed your askhoennlegends blog on my other blogs because I thought your art style was crazy good. Huge awe over it. So much so I made a pixelated sprite of your necrozmafied kyogre. I think at the time that was one of the biggest sprites I'd ever made. Shame I don't have that sprite anymore because it's pretty neat. Anyway, the mix of a radical art style with some goofy-ass posts really appealed to me.

Next was the Vekpa blog. The same thing again. This badass art style paired with a goofy Pokémon had such charm for me. Vekpa is the dad I think everyone wishes they had. Fuck, you draw him to look so soft and snuggly??? Bingo and Lunch probably enjoy the fuck out of that. The antics and responses that Vekpa has given has cracked me up sometimes. Lunch's birthday bash was a real hoot!

Now you've got your mewntwo blog. You've pushed the whole mouse thing onto these fuckers and it's just an absolutely super design for them. Like, it makes sense. It works so damn well. I gotta appreciate it. Line art? Smooth as fuck with super line weight attention. Fucking awe inspiring. Choice of colours? Big yes. It's all so pastel-feeling. It makes me feel warm inside. Like, how do you do that?? Are you a wizard??? I wouldn't be surprised. You've got an absolutely gorgeous art style and it's definitely inspired me. I sometimes take a loon at your posts when I'm feeling a bit garbage about my art just to inspire me.

Please. Send your characters to interact. Please. I beg of you. It would be an absolute honour. The implications of it would be fantastic. Honestly, send Vekpa to Flint. That shit would be hilarious as fuck. My man would not be able to handle it. Honestly, Destino could and would make it a personal challenge to make Vekpa cry. Ticking off pissing off legendaries one by one like a checklist. I really do adore all of the characters you've put out. They're genuinely loveable and each charming in their own ways. Your just really cool and I really love all of the stuff you've made. I need to speak with you more really! I need to do it.

Also yes! Rat lovers united! I absolutely enjoy every pic you've posted of your babies. Mine are incredibly old at this point but they look so much like yours. Have a forbidden rat pic. She's grumpy I woke her up.)

[objectivesubjectivity]

My Favorite Albums of 2024*

*not necessarily from 2024

I'm back at it once again, sharing my Top 10 CDs, in alphabetical order by title, from the 151 I've acquired over the past year. They may not be from 2024. Hell, they may not even be from this century. But I didn't physically own them until this year. That's the only rule. And boy do I love making up absolutely meaningless rules. Let's get into it!

Say Anything - All My Friends Are Enemies: Early Rarities

Say Anything released one of the most unhinged, passionate, and self-indulgent albums I picked up this year and it may have made it on this list if it wasn’t for splurging on a 3-disc (!!!) compilation of all of their pre-Is A Real Boy material showcasing just how great of a songwriter Bemis can be. Plus, his commentary all over the liner notes is *chef’s kiss*.

Charlie XCX - Brat

I spent a decent amount of time declaring how this was “not for me” (I’m in my late 30s, I don’t go to clubs, I’ve never done coke, etc…) but it just didn’t let up. The overarching concept of accepting one’s full self, flaws and all, is universal and these songs have a depth that blossoms on repeat listens. There’s a reason this is on all the "best of" lists.

Cursive - Devourer

It’s been a year of “return to form albums” and none has been as exciting or as potent as Cursive’s 10th. The cello is back. The horns are back. It’s as loud, brash, and pessimistic as ever but Kasher also reminds everyone that he can also write one hell of a hook. Also, while “MUSTARDDDDDDDDDD” takes the cake for greatest yelled lyric of the year, Tim spewing “MOTHER FUCKER” on “The Age of Impotence,” is a close second.

Eels - EELS TIME!

I had given up on E’s lyrical prowess a good decade ago but maybe that was premature. While this album has a smattering of the lazy, cringeworthy rhymes gracing most things post “Blinking Lights,” it also is home to a myriad thoughtful and earnest ponderings on the temporal nature of life and how we choose to spend our finite amount of time. Oh, and an incredible verse about going on a date with someone who likes furries. EELS ARE FUCKING BACK, BABY.

Hello Mary - Emita Ox

I wanted to like Hello Mary’s self-titled album a lot more than I did. The Brooklyn 3 piece possessed a delicate fury and 90s post-grunge aesthetic that warmed my heart but the album never really stuck. That’s not the case with Emita Ox: it’s heavier and more mathy but it balances those elements with lush harmonies and superb melodies. This sounds like a band finding themselves and I cannot wait to see what they discover next.

Devon Kay & The Solutions - Grieving Expectation

Every year I go on a Pure Noise Records shopping spree (it helps that their cds are frequently quite cheap and BOGO) which allows me to discover a ton of music I otherwise wouldn’t have heard and every now and then, I find a gem. This is one of those gems. Blurring the lines between ska, punk, emo, and good ol’ fashioned “Alt-Rock,” this album hits like Jeff Rosenstock by way of “Bring Your Own Stereo” era Jimmie's Chicken Shack. It’s got great choruses, a killer horn section, and I found myself frequently reaching the end and starting it right back over again. Easily my favorite discovery of the year.

MJ Lenderman - Manning Fireworks

This is popping up in one of the top 3 slots on many of the End of Year lists I’ve checked out and for good reason. It’s instantly approachable with humorous and poignant lyrics that unearth themselves more and more on repeat listens. Also, to stand out in the crowded “Americana” field these days is a feat in itself. Bravo.

Macseal - Permanent Repeat

I saw this four-piece open for The Wonder Years a couple years ago and was immediately intrigued by how their melodies and chord progressions consistently shifted away from where I expected but not at the expense of the song itself. In yet another crowded field, this time emo-tinged Americana (“Emoacana?”), they definitely made a mark. A couple years later, they’ve replaced some of the twists and turns with a deeper ability to craft great, memorable songs, and, holy shit, is it effective. It’s pretty ballsy to name your album “Permanent Repeat” but that’s basically what this disc has been doing ever since it showed up in my mailbox. This is, hands down, my album of the year.

Martha - Please Don’t Take Me Back

Positively pleasing, practically perfect, politically-charged, pop-punk from across the pond. Head-bopped to this one many times this past year. No skips.

The Pharmaceutical Bandits - Those Damn Bandits

This isn’t a “good” album per se (it’s the debut album from a late 90s teenage ska-punk band so expectations probably shouldn't be that high in the first place) but it was one of the only Drive-Thru Records CD I didn’t own, so of course it had to be on this list. 

To their credit, after this album, they altered their name to Rx Bandits and put out a ton of great ska-punk tracks. And then they went prog-rock and put out some great tracks in that style as well. It’s a strange journey but well worth it.

Other albums I liked from 2024 but haven't yet physically acquired.

Doechii - Alligator Bites Never Heal (Only Vinyl pre-release at the moment. Hoping for a CD as well.)

Tyler, The Creator - Chromakopia (Ordered it back in November. Possibly still stuck in transit?)

Kendrick Lamar - GNX (pre-ordered the CD from Amoeba. Feels right to get that from a Cali based store)

Other Assorted 2024 Stuff

Favorite Live Bands seen in 2024:

Emperor X (The Broadway - 4/27)

Something Corporate (Asbury Park - 8/23)

Soul Coughing (Brooklyn Steel - 10/4)

Hello Mary - (Warsaw 10/26)

The Blood Brothers (Irving Plaza - 12/13)

Favorite Plays seen in 2024

The Ally (The Public)

Wicked (Apollo Victoria Theatre)

Life and Trust (Connell Tower)

Medea RE: Versed (Sheen Center)

Gypsy (Majestic)

Favorite Movies seen in 2024

Love Lies Bleeding

Strange Darling

The Substance

Longlegs

The Endless

Beetlejuice (the original, I haven't seen the sequel)

We’re All Going to the World’s Fair

Late Night with the Devil

Milk and Serial

Labyrinth

Favorite TV seen in 2024

Alice in Borderland (Season 2)

Baby Reindeer

Rhythm and Flow (Season 2 - even though I disagreed with their final choice)

Abbott Elementary

Only Murders

Last Week Tonight

Just For Us

Favorite Podcasts listened to in 2024

Entrée PeeE Neur’s Entrepreneur Tour Featuring Appetizer P Neur

The "Drop Dead Gorgeous" Episode from Scott Hasn't Seen

The Secrets Hotline

Detoxicity

The Run Up

538 Politics Podcast

The Daily

Favorite Books read in 2024

All The Kings Men by Robert Penn Warren

Frankenstein by Mary Shelly

Basketball (and Other Things) by Shea Serrano

Slonim 9: A Memoir by Daniel Barban Levin

[crystalelemental]

Full tierlist is here, breakdown of A-tier. A-tier is excellent. I generally have a lot to work with here, often in headcanon territory but I also maintain a lot have good canon information to work with.

Cyrus: I adore this loser. I have written so many fics about just making his life worse by offering love and support. He is so fundamentally broken and I adore that. I think part of it is just...man, I can't even say I'd do different. I get it. He's making some points. They're not good ones, but they resonate.

Carmine: Carmine is the perfect embodiment of a genuinely kind bitchy teenager, and I absolutely adore her. Tremendous confidence into shaky friendships, but is genuinely trying to be compassionate even if she's not particularly great at it sometimes.

Cyllene: mother dearest. God I adore Cyllene. She was already a lot of fun, but when you're sent out of the village and she's giving her speech about being true to yourself even when others don't understand you it's like...oh, she gets it. Like, this is someone who is tremendously duty-bound, but will follow the morally correct action over duty's demand. Also she's a swordmaster whose partner is an Abra that relays information, and she's scared to death of bugs. Perfect.

Volo: Cyrus-style vibes with next levels of unhinged religious mania. And he's got a baby egg creature that he loves so so much. Volo's such a fun dude, he's got so much going on and it all just works so well. Even his stupid hair.

Nemona: Unlike the other two friends who only made it to B, Nemona's an easy top A. I adore Nemona, she is so much fun. Girl has so much autism, and it's honestly presented in a way that makes her incredibly distinct and enjoyable. You get the quirks, but you also get the occasional frustrations people have with her over her lack of social awareness and it's so good.

Lillie: My baby girl. Lillie's interesting in that she's the only one this high up the list I've never written in fic. I really like Lillie, I think she's great fun, but I honestly cannot generate ideas for her. She's the emotional heart of Gen 7, and as such has a lot that's been done, but it leaves little to fill in for her. She's just very good to me.

Steven: my man. I love this rock nerd. His friendship with Roxanne is a huge draw for me, and I think his general attitude is just a lot of fun. Honestly, while Zinnia doesn't really do it for me, I do love that she's so antagonistic and he'd borderline "I don't even know who you are." It's just endlessly funny to me.

Winona: Fantastic vibes as a Flying trainer, absolute space case per Masters, and honestly her "Day with" segment in Masters has me headcanon her as ace. The idea that someone is romantically interested does not once cross her mind, because why would anyone think that? It's gotta be for battling. I really like her.

Erika: Cute flower lesbian, little bit of a mean girl vibe going on given her teasing of Jasmine. Her constant love of napping is a whole mood, and she just has a great vibe.

Iono: Talk about a fucking top tier character design, my god. Iono just nails it. Honestly adore her streamer energy, she's perfectly unhinged, and her partner being Bellibolt is just divine. She's an astonishingly tough fight, too, and just...I really love Iono.

Lusamine: SuMo did everything I love about Lusamine, while USUM kinda ruined a lot of it. I like my Lusamine being terrible. She's at her most interesting when she's unrepentant and cruel, but has a history that makes you think hey, we can connect some dots here on how she got like this. Similar to Guzma, it's an excellent approach to cycles of trauma, and she lands perfectly for me.

Cogita: Look. We all know my type. Cogita rules.

Darach: Look. We all know who my #1 is. Darach is here because of them. I really like Darach, I love his association with Caitlin, I generally love the really loyal ones. And I adore that his teams feel very butler-like. Empoleon, Gallade, Staraptor, Entei; those are premier butler Pokemon.

Poppy: "Are you seriously telling me Poppy is your favorite Paldea E4 member?" Please await me completing a fanfic again for the Poppy one that hopefully explains why. It's pure headcanon but I love this kid. She's nine years old and super tiny, and her ace is a trollz doll with a hammer bigger than she is. That's great.

Rika: Needs no introduction, Rika is divine. I do think people sometimes get her deal wrong, though? Like, Rika is the heavy stickler for rules. She's not particularly flexible. But that's part of her fun. She's super goofy and mains a Clodsire for god's sake, but at the same time is kind of a stick in the mud sometimes. That's good contrast, I like her a lot.

Whitney: I think Whitney exuded a lot of personality in her debut. Being the type to get really upset about losing and forgetting to give you a badge over it is a massive presentation of character most gym leaders through the series don't get. She's quirky and fun and I like her a lot.

Hassel: Listen, this is a personal preference thing, but I like when they're just like "We need a sensitive man, make him exaggeratedly over-emotional and cry a lot." I don't know, it just lands with me. I know it's supposed to be caricature, but it actually lands as sincere to me, and I like him a lot for it. Also, of all the professors, his is the only approach to pedagogy I actually liked. Like, his class feels like the one I'd enjoy being in.

Opal: Absolute lunatic in a generation that felt like it lacked those, I adore Opal. Her entire deal is just wild. She's ancient and crumbling, is literally magic, kidnaps Bede to make him become her successor, astoundingly astute about how people are given her read on Leon and Sonia. Opal rules.

Brassius: Speaking of unhinged, I adore this dude. Literally jumps off a windmill to initiate battle, and is constantly screaming about art. Like, literally screaming at the top of his lungs. He's so dramatic. I am not one to ship, but I do love him and Hassel, this feels like such a dynamic to me.

Anabel/Looker: I'm clustering them together because they are also a dynamic. They're interesting independent of one another, but it's the close devoted partners thing that takes them over many others. I really enjoy their dynamic when I see others write it. I don't feel like I have a perfect handle on all their eccentricities together, but I can safely say they've never missed.

Laventon: The dad to Cyllene's mom, Laventon is just a super cool dude. I really like this guy. He's actually dedicated to science, does his best but is kinda shit at the core mechanic he needs for research, but is fiercely protective of the kids. He's fantastic.

Lysandre: Pure headcanon territory, Lysandre is just kind of an asshole in divine ways. I can't really get into it without writing an essay, go read this if you're curious. It's the explanation for Serena, too.

Akari: Actually a character in her own story who went through stuff and exhibits some personality. Super cute design, big fan. Sometimes it's just about what I'm projecting on.

Serena: See Lysandre, I think Serena's the protagonist with the most actual character to dissect.

Dawn/Kris: Literally just favorites. Dawn has goober status per Masters, Kris has nerd and rage status per the same.

Silver: Just a genuinely excellent rival. Silver does it well, being a jerk at the outset who learns and grows alongside his Pokemon to become stronger and happier for it. He maintains his edge, never getting too non-confrontational, but does genuinely start to like...ease up and open up. He's just a strong character arc done right.

[eriexplosion]

Ruins of War time, picking up where we left off - screaming in terror!

"I would say this was going well!" Well that was your first mistake Tech. Never say that.

CRASHING? Hunter is! so! Tired!

The way that they actually think everything is fine and then the container abruptly falls JUST A LITTLE MORE.

Okay though this femur fracture is not actually that integral to the storyline, and it's very specific and all I'm saying is that I think the femur is going to have broken again in the fall or something of a similar nature and give him a bad leg. Here's how reduced mobility Tech can win.

Genuinely freaky how he barely made a sound though like tiniest 'agh' ever for 150 kgs slamming onto his leg.

"It's unlikely the thieves who infiltrated the cargo ship survived the crash" Parallels parallels everywhere.

God the way they have to haul Tech over the cliff like fucking cargo. Just hoist him.

Interesting that they've never gone over the plans with Omega before, she doesn't know what Plan Double Zero means, and it's a very basic radio silence code. They set up that Omega hasn't been taught the Plan codes before hinging their finale on a plan code - giving us an excuse potentially in season 3 to have Crosshair explain what it is, because I doubt it's as simple as I'M KILLING MYSELF BYE.

"What are you doing here?" "I LIVE HERE."

They are literally making this man take them home, Romar actually has a ton of reasons to turn them out on their ass but he's being a very good sport about it.

All Omega wants to do is prove that she's worth having around after hearing what Echo said, this is her sole goal in life right now and I need to hug her.

"I'm keeping an eye on you" you are holding an old man hostage in his own home Omega it's not ideal.

KALEIDOSCOPE. "For blast's sake, it's a TOY. It makes you HAPPY."

Tech and Echo's argument oh my god, the way Omega feels like her family is fracturing. BABY.

HEY ACE. I love Romero so much. Explaining that it's not a Separatist archive. It's Serrenian. They existed before the war (they exist now, after the war) and how Tech never thought of it like that because clones existed ONLY FOR WAR aghhhhhh MY HEART.

Wrecker instantly turning the tank gun into a hand held gun is just. So attractive actually, I love that. "I make a pretty good tank" damn right you do."

"She was just here..." "WELL SHE'S NOT NOW!"

God Echo is really having a TIME of it.

Tech literally hobbling out on a fractured femur like that absolutely is going to weaken it further just saying.

I do love the detail that Wrecker is intentionally shooting AROUND the other stormtroopers when using the tank gun, so he has at least a chance of not hurting them too badly.

Captain Wilco having this moment with his helmet off as he kneels by a dead trooper is only a couple seconds but it does SO much for making us feel attached to him before The Events at the end.

They always go SO hard on Tech's music honestly, there's so many moments of him getting fired on and the fight behind the tree and Everything that the music just goes incredibly hard. The way it cuts out for just a second when he finally collapses before swelling up just a little again. Damn the Kiners are good at this.

NO Omega you cannot have even a SMALL amount of treasure.

"You don't have a normal life because of me" god babygirl this is very important but oh my god please have this breakdown ANYWHERE that is not a collapsing container unit.

Telling Omega she has to let it go... with her worry about being the reason they're in danger set to reappear in season three, I feel like that's going to be a thing that comes back. Everyone's a burden bby let's get you some fruit.

Will the kaleidoscope ever come back only time will tell

I'M A SURVIVOR REMEMBER? Refuse to believe that's not related to Tech's plot with the way that it lingers on him. I'm sorry the man's unkillability signals are so heavy.

"We made the right choice, Omega. I'd do it all again." MY HEART

Obsessed still with the fact that the Batch must have been reported dead by Crosshair, just, god there's so much there that's just IMPLIED instead of stated.

Wilco ;_;

Anyway as a premier this one REALLY doesn't actually cover much? Like they are fun episodes but we don't get much new info or anything, but we do get several small things that I think would very possibly come back.

[thessalian]

Thess vs Waiting Out Bugs

There was going to be more Horizon Forbidden West yesterday, but yesterday morphed into an unbelievably bad pain day. I managed to get through the work day - had to; Scruffman and Temp were both out so I had no one to report to and we were already shorthanded. But after that, even sitting in the desk chair was a no. However, I was reasonably okay first thing, so I did try for that stupid drone. I know computer processes are complicated, but yeesh.

Right. Attempt 1. Can I get to that wall without stepping in blight?

I can! Up I go, and ... Ah. In a game where there's a difference between being able to stand on something and Being Able To Stand On Something, those gun turrets are things I am Able To Stand On. Buuuuuuut the drone's still too speedy. Reload.

Attempt 2. Back up the wall, and ... now it's stopping in the wrong place. It's supposed to stop near the turrets, I'm pretty sure. I mean, that is why I am Able To Stand On them. But drone is stopping right above the doors I kerboomed the firegleam on awhile back. Can I climb up there?

Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiii cannot climb up there. Is the turret on the other side close enough to let me leap to the drone?

Nooooooooo it isn't. Fuck. Reload.

...Huh. I am ... at a different campfire - one nearer the gun turret I was balanced on when I tried and failed for the drone. There must have been an autosave.

Attempt 3 - third time's the charm?

THIRD TIME IS THE CHARM. It's stopping at gun turrets. UP I GO.

And yaaaaaaaay! Don't like having to land in blight with it, but at least I don't have to "Hold E To Grab Data" for very long.

Right. I have some time. Now what?

I wanted to check out some stuff around Plainsong. I can splash out on using one of my fast-travel packs. Man, I know we used to be able to craft fast-travel packs but I don't remember if or how we can on this game, so--

...And just as I think that, the game gives me a tool tip on how to do that. HUZZAH! Normally I just go to the nearest campfire and fast travel from there, but crafting my own fast-travel packs is probably good for when I'm doing morning gaming.

Right. There should be a codex entry in this area. Fields full of blight, satellite dish array ... should be around the base of this dish somewhere.

...Or up. It could be up.

Look, I know that's a grapple point; let me grapple without potentially stepping in blight, okay?

Right. I can scan it from here. No more jumping.

Well. Maybe let's just see what's through this gap.

Ah. I could have just walked over to it from here. Ah well. Lesson learned. I could go check for green shiny elsewhere but I probably don't really have time for that. So ... hi-ho, hi-ho, it's off to work I go.

Today is going to be a take-it-easy day. It's going to have to be; I'm feeling better but dear gods yesterday was awful. Lots of rest breaks, maybe a nap, not leaving the house if I don't absolutely have to.

Nice thing is that we're starting to have the kind of weather where I can have the windows open during the day without worrying that the heater's going to kick on. We're supposed to get to 20 Celcius today. Currently at 16-ish, and I can get some fresh air. I mean, yeah, it's apparently a high pollen day, but it's a high pollen day for me either way, 'cos my petunias.

On the subject of the garden, most of my stuff has sprouted and many have even started growing adult leaves. A few still haven't sprouted, but I'll give them some time before I panic. Chamomile in particular has a reputation for just taking its own sweet time. But the dill and particularly the coriander are growing incredibly fast and I'm probably going to have to repot them soon. Good thing I already bought my Big Bag of Soil for the year.

Yeah, this is me being Plant Parent - pondering the loss of baby leaves instead of baby teeth and thinking about how fast some of them outgrow their pots rather than their onesies. The reason why I own a t-shirt from TeeTurtle that reads "My Plants Are My Babies". It's a little twee, but I guess it's true enough anyway.

(...oh fuck I need to take out the garbage later...)

[remyfire]

Bj/Sidney

Do I Ship It? ALL RIGHT, back in it again after a breakfast break, please forgive me for the delay!!

Yes, I Ship It!!

What made you ship it? —Truly I cannot articulate properly how potent they are to me, but I'm gonna damn well try. I talked a little bit in my Sidney/BJ/Hawk ask about how interesting it is to me that Sidney and BJ very rarely have a moment alone on screen together, and how it got my brain buzzing about if BJ is in fact actively choosing to avoid Sidney. I love to play on that with them, BJ who has so much buried under the surface, Sidney who has almost a sixth sense for where to apply pressure to receive a response. I write them both as needing to be in control every second of every day, which compelled me also—one of them has to give in a little for them to get anywhere at all, and that takes a lot of negotiation, a lot of growing trust. And then frankly I was compelled by the idea of giving BJ daddy issues. I'm so so sorry, BJ, but you are ripe for it. Specifically I wanted to play on the concept of BJ having a buried distrust toward men in Sidney's age range because that was around the age his father was when BJ received the majority of his neglect and emotional abuse, the age he was right when BJ cut his parents off and never went back. There's distrust but there's also a desperation for approval, for praise. The moment I made that connection, I was fucking gone for them.

What are your favorite things about the ship? —I love how BJ brings out the more playful energy of Sidney in Dear Sigmund. I love how even when BJ missteps and violates Sidney's trust, Sidney already has such a deep fondness for him that he doesn't come down nearly as harshly as he could. I love the idea of Sidney catching sight of how often BJ ends up in Hawkeye's shadow as this baby surgeon barely out of residency put up beside this revered god of life, and Sidney getting to nourish that part of BJ before Beej ever starts getting buried in his flashes of self-doubt that drive him to do incredibly unwise things. I love BJ getting the opportunity to be unabashedly angry in a setting with a person who can absorb it and bring him to a sense of closure. I love how protective we see BJ get over Sidney from time to time. I love the webs of secrets that both BJ and Sidney have getting to unravel a little at a time with each other when they don't trust anyone else to look at them the same way as it all starts coming out. And frankly I love them getting to lean on each other during the absolute mess of a man they both care very, very much for beginning to deteriorate. I need these two cuddled up tight, stat.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? —I'm trying to think if there's anything particularly unpopular about them that I have when they're a ship barely anybody else sails haha. Many of the things I change are more character-specific—I write Sidney as a gay man who does not actually have a child, for example—and I'm not sure if any of those things count as unpopular.