#Hunter Hearst Helmsley

[could-they-be-a-pro-wrestler]

Wrestling lore is really funny to explain to non-wrestling people, mainly because you have to suspend your disbelief much more than you would do for stuff like anime or superhero fiction. Think of it like this; it’s normal for a shonen anime protagonist or a superhero to demonstrate they have superpowers usually because it’s established early on. That also goes for other parts of the lore, such as the world-building, the MacGuffins, and the history of that world.

But in wrestling, characters and storylines change all the time and are ongoing (I’ve seen the term “longform storytelling” used). So you end up with HUGE leaps in logic, such as:

1) There’s a supernatural being from hell who temporarily became a biker gang member, and then went back to being a supernatural being from hell

2) There’s a male model who gave out grooming tips who eventually evolved into Captain America/Homelander.

3) Triple H committed burglary on camera. He invaded Randy Orton’s home, beat him up, destroyed some of his property, and then threw Orton out the window. But it’s all fine because he’s the good guy, so he’s still employed by the WWE.

4) Dominik Mysterio is beefing with his dad, who literally fought for child custody of him in a wrestling match. Keep that in mind anytime you see Dominik not getting along with Rey.

5) Edge got sent to hell, but is okay now.

6) CM Punk was once a cult leader, but stopped doing that after he lost his hair. Then he became the opposite, as in he turned into an anti-authority rebel.

7) A lot of wrestlers, such as Sheamus and Shawn Spears, apparently used to work at WWE as background staff/security guards.

8) Real life famous music artist Bad Bunny is part of the lore and he actually beat a world champion (Damian Priest) in a match. And I don’t mean Bad Bunny is playing a character. In the WWE lore, Bad Bunny is playing himself.

(Feel free to add on any other leaps in logic from pro-wrestling)

[salemshotspot]

Homophobic wrestling fans are so funny to me, fans who say 'they're making wrestling gay' because Punk had a trans shirt on or Cody said queer people should be allowed to enjoy wrestling, fans who say they miss the attitude era 'when it wasn't gay' then you put any wrestling show on that was during the attitude era and it's just Shawn and Hunter having unprotected sex live for an hour

[mr-wrestlemania]

"I wanna ruin our friendship

I dont how to say this-

Because you're really my dearest friend"

[pepsidogonline]

[ughdoir]

꣑ৎ triple h ! fucking the authority

contains black female reader, lowercase intended, pet names, fingering, spit, dom, praise, minors don’t interact

thinking about ceo! hunter catching you masterbating in his office. he’s so crude wanting you to show him how you play with yourself.

“will you ever behave?” he knew the answer was no ,and you wasted no time sliding your panties to the side. wetness coating the fabric as he sat in front of you eyes low, and balancing on the balls of his feet.

you could feel his breath against your pussy a low wine escaping once the pad of your fingers came into contact with your clit finding a rhythm.

“pretty doll.” he grips the phone tightly wanting the camera to capture how good you made yourself feel. the bitter chill in his office perking your pretty nipples and kissing your leaking core.

with shaky hands you slide a finger into your pussy not long before you add another the fullness sending your head back and clenching your chubby thighs together.

“atta girl, you’re so wet for me. go on let everyone hear you.” you moaned at his words both digits working faster inside of your gummy walls as your cream pooled on the oak table.

“hunter.” his name fell from your pouty lips desperately wanting to feel him in any capacity. the lewd sounds of your cunt and calling his name perks his interest coming to wrap his free hand around your throat.

with a blurry vision the camera captures the glob of spit that lands on your clit glistening your folds as you fucked yourself into your hand. cheeks flushed and falsies damped with tears as the man above you smirked.

“gonna cum for daddy?” hunter knew you were close that ditzy expression and bubbly feeling in the pit of your stomach on the verge. all you could do was whimper hunter placing his forehead against yours as he strums your clit.

white toes resting on his shoulders watching three digits slick with arousal slam in and out of your needy cunt opening your mouth to catch his spit and swallow gingerly.

“i’m cu-m-ming” you could barely finish your sentence wetness slipping out of you and splashing his expensive cufflinks as expletives spat from the man. fingers working towards overstimulating his pretty girl and kissing your plump lips drowning out your cries.

with a gasp you came again body trembling and head resting into his chest as hunter kissed your temple a sweet gesture before the real fun began.

[okayymj]

Credits to @nikoexxtra1 on Instagram.

[the-fact-of-the-matter]

#SNME is live NATIONWIDE at 8/7c on @nbc & @peacock…and @ShawnMichaels, you need a bigger hat…

[fangin-n-bangin]

dumb thing i made for my gf of mine and her fave wrestlers but it is too funny to not share

this came to me in a shroom-induced fever dream (/hj. it's a long story) and i just had to make it

so behold: wwf femme-butch scale. i can't explain my rankings. they are just like that.

[dilanmoodboards]

I Need to share my agenda

[not-ur-boy-toy]

Your honour, they're all guilty of stealing my heart...

[nightmarishwaltz]

Quite possibly the blurriest photo I’ve ever seen but I haven’t seen this one before

[rpfshippingpolls]

⚠️ DON’T START DISCOURSE ABOUT RPF IN THE NOTES!! YOU WILL BE BLOCKED IF YOU DO SO ⚠️

Do you ship it?

Reason:

“pro wrestlers are already very touchy around each other in the first place but theyre sooo much worse. there's so many photos of shawn clinging and climbing all over hunter. early attitude era is known for them doing provocative things that often includes homoerotic hijinks. they've took photos naked together. hunter accidentally joked he's bisexual. they're so close that hunter's wife thought he's fucking shawn michaels once. they now retired from wrestling and now just managed the new wrestler together like a pair of gay old dads. triple h once hugged shawn michaels like they're in brokeback mountain, literally. even straight men on wresting forums noticed that hunter only seems delighted around shawn. i heard theyre ROAD WIVES”

[salemshotspot]

IM SO UPSET /j

I wanted to just make a silly video like ‘haha guys look wrestling is sooo gay’ but this has turned out to unironically be the best thing I’ve ever made and I’m so upset about it /j

TAGS: @outsiderswolfpac

[mr-wrestlemania]

[pepsidogonline]

They matched each others 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂👅👀 energy

[hbklvr]