#How To Stop A Divorce In Virginia

[juniperskye]

The Story of Us

Sneak Peek: Three years, seven months and twenty-four days. That is how long you had been with Aaron Hotchner. That also happens to be the same amount of time that Aaron had been lying to his team.

Aaron Hotchner x Reader

Fluff/Angst

Word count: 3468

Warnings: Age gap, pregnancy, mention of divorce, mention of Haley and her death, mention of child abduction case (no details), pregnancy complications, mentions of hospitals. Use of y/n (once I think). I think that's everything - let me know if I missed anything else.

Not edited - please be kind.

I do not consent to having my work translated or reposted to any other site. That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story.

Three years, seven months and twenty-four days. That is how long you had been with Aaron Hotchner. That also happens to be the same amount of time that Aaron had been lying to his team.

It really wasn’t that Aaron wanted to hide you from them, he just had to keep you safe. He needed to keep you separated from the horrors the plagued his career.

When he met you, he honestly wasn’t sure what would come of it, you were quite a bit younger than him, only having just begun your ascent into adulthood. It wasn’t until he got to know you that he knew he was hooked. You had him wrapped around your finger and all you had done was be your most authentic self. Something he envied.

On your first official date he’d learned so much about you, you were twenty-five, you owned your own café, you had moved to Virginia just a year prior from Arizona, you were divorced, and you were a single mother. You had explained to Aaron that the pregnancy had been unplanned and ultimately was the beginning of the end of your marriage. Your daughter, Norah, was four and the divorce had been long been finalized when you began dating.

The two of you had agreed to take things slow, seeing as you both had been through so much in your previous relationships. It had taken him some time, but he did eventually explain what had happened to Haley – He had spared you of the more gruesome details, but he explained that his job was dangerous, and it is what had led to their demise, so he gave you an out. Once he had finished his tangent you had caressed his cheek and leaned in and kissed him, explaining to him that you understood and didn’t plan on going anywhere.

You and Aaron have not had it easy over the last three and a half years, after just a year of dating you had moved in together. That hadn’t been easy, you had to adjust to his lifestyle, and he had to adjust to yours. It was hard work finding the balance of your newly blended family, but you had managed – coming out on the other side even stronger than before.

Three months after moving in you had found the ring. It hadn’t been intentional by any means. You were doing the laundry on your day off and while placing his socks in their designated drawer you had noticed the little velvet box. It sat there mocking you as you just gawked at it. You were definitely ready to marry Aaron, but you questioned whether he was truly ready to marry you. You had been together for just over a year and the only family of his you had met was Jack, Sean and Jessica. How could he possibly want to add you and Norah to his family if he was too afraid to introduce you to them.

That night when Aaron got home you confronted him, you had waited until dinner was finished and the kids were tucked into bed, not wanting them to be a part of a conversation of such nature. It started off as you simply explaining to him how you had found the ring – adamant to inform him that you had not been snooping, you had found it purely by accident. That is when the word vomit started, you just couldn’t stop yourself from droning on about how you loved him and you are so excited that he wants to take this step, but you can’t help but feel like maybe you have pressured him into this and that you would stop talking about the future and just take it day by day because you couldn’t live with yourself if you had forced him into this decision and you would never want him to resent you because of it.

Before you could get another word out Aaron had practically shouted your name, it had been the only way to get you to stop talking and listen to him in that moment. He had asked you where on earth you had gotten the idea that he felt forced or pressured from, he was so heartbroken to know that you were feeling this way. This is when you explained your theory about him not being ready to introduce you to his family, let alone add you to it. Aaron’s face fell at your words, everything coming together in his head. He looked into your eyes and the walls he had spent so long building up after Haley’s death, came crumbling down. He reassured you that he wanted nothing more than to make you and Norah a permanent part of the Hotchner family (if you’d let him) and he explained to you why he had continued to keep his personal life so separate from his professional one. This time around he gave you some of the details surrounding Haley’s death and it was your turn to have the pieces fall into place.

Your conversation ended in an engagement as well as an understanding that for his piece of mind and your safety, things would continue to be separate. With the clause that Aaron would at least tell you about his job a little more and he would tell you all about his team (even if they didn’t know about you). You wanted to feel connected to him completely and in order to do so, you needed to know about the other half of his life.

Eight months later you were married, after another six months you had officially adopted Jack and Aaron had officially adopted Norah. The Hotchner family was complete! Or so you had thought. Your family had enjoyed six-ish months of bliss after the adoptions had been finalized before your world had turned upside down. After a night of celebration, (Jack winning his soccer game, Norah’s A+ on her spelling test, your new menu, and Aaron’s completion of his most recent case) the two of you had enjoyed a particularly heated evening which leads to you – three weeks later staring at the stupid digital letters spelling out PREGNANT. Aaron and you had both mentioned wanting a big family, but you had assumed that the four of you were what he meant.

Aaron took the news well, honestly, you’re pretty sure he was more excited than you were. The two of you talked about how you would make the announcement, both to the kids and to your extended family. You also scheduled the first appointment to check and see if this was really happening.

After that first appointment, in which you confirmed that you were in fact pregnant, you and Aaron had begun planning. You talked about potential baby names, and you began looking at houses. At your eight-week appointment (which you’d gone to solo as Aaron had been working) you’d gotten some news that would really change things…you were worried about what this would mean for you and Aaron.

When he finally arrived home five days later, you wasted no time in breaking the news. You were having triplets, and you had officially been labeled as a high-risk pregnancy. Aaron sat stunned for a while, so long that you had started to worry. You knew he needed time to process this, but you really needed him too, truthfully, you were scared. Your pregnancy with Norah had not been easy and that was one baby. Here you were now trying to fathom how difficult this pregnancy and birth would be. When Aaron finally snapped out of the daze he’d fallen into, he reached for you, holding your hands in his own while reassuring you that you guys could do this, and everything would be okay.

Two months later you moved into your new home. Things had been changing faster than you could wrap your head around them and while you were so excited to be in your new home and settled with these babies that were officially four months along, you couldn’t help but succumb to that nagging feeling in the back of your mind. It had been telling you that things would not be this good forever and there was bound to be a bump in this road at some point.

The bump that came was not one you were prepared for.

Three years, seven months and twenty-four days. That is how long you had been with Aaron Hotchner. That also happens to be the same amount of time that Aaron had been lying to his team.

The Hotchner family had been settled in their new home and you were just nearing the end of your pregnancy. Aaron had been called in for a time sensitive local case – child abduction. These cases were always hard on him, having Jack and needing to leave him to work these cases, but now it wasn’t just Jack. It was Jack and Norah and your three unborn babies and you, Aaron had been feeling the pressure of this case and you could see it on his face, in the fleeting moments you’d been able to share since the case had begun three days ago.

It was time and you knew it, that all too familiar feeling, the pain coming in waves every so often. The kids were at school and Jess was out of town. The only person you could call was Aaron, and he wasn’t answering. He had been really good about attending to her calls during the pregnancy but given his current mental state and the pressure he’s under to solve and close this case, you weren’t exactly surprised that he wasn’t responsive.

There was one other person you could call. Aaron had given you his number in case of an emergency. When he gave your number to Dave with little to no explanation, Dave just smiled a nodded his head. The team had noticed the changes in Hotch as your relationship had progressed. He didn’t stay late anymore unless absolutely necessary, he had been happier, smiling more, wearing a ring again. Nobody said anything as they figured Hotch would share when he was ready…they just didn’t expect it to be nearly four years later.

So, when Dave’s phone rang, and it was your contact that had flashed across the screen, he didn’t hesitate to answer.

“Hello?”

“Hi, this is David Rossi, right? Aaron gave me this number in the case of an emergency!” You rushed.

“Yes, this is Dave. You must be Y/N. Is everything alright?” Dave asked, waving off Emily’s look of confusion.

“Umm I’m just trying to get a hold of Aaron and he’s not answering and…I’m not sure how much information he gave you about me or anything, but screw it, now is not the time, I am in labor, and I need Aaron to get here like now.” You were rambling, but at this point you just didn’t care anymore, the contractions were pretty close together at this point and you were in far too much pain.

“Okay, don’t worry, we will get a hold of Aaron. What is your address, I will come and get you and drive you to the hospital. Unless you think you need an ambulance.”

“I don’t think I need an ambulance. If you or Aaron could get here to take me that would be ideal. I’m at our house, the address is 123 West Elm. The kids are both at school, someone will need to pick them up!” You were starting to panic, and Dave could tell.

“Don’t worry about that we will send someone to pick up the kids, I am on my way to you now. Do you want me to stay on the phone with you until I get there?” Dave was being so patient with you, and you couldn’t have been more grateful.

“Um, no that’s okay, I should really get my bag together and ready to go. Have you called Aaron yet?”

“Okay, you go ahead and get your bag, I will come to the door once I arrive. And I have Emily calling Aaron now, okay?”

“Okay, thank you Dave.”

“Of course. I will be there soon.”

Once he hung up the phone, he told Emily to dial Hotch’s number. She didn’t question him but ultimately, she was worried and confused by what was going on. The phone rang four times before Hotch finally answered. When he did, he immediately told Dave that they had a new lead that JJ and Morgan were actively looking into, it had been promising. Dave had to interrupt Aaron’s briefing to let him know that his wife was in labor and that they were currently headed to their house to get her to the hospital.

Aaron felt immediate panic, in more ways than one. First and foremost, his wife was in labor, and she was all alone, second this was a high-risk pregnancy and there was a chance that the four of them might not all make it through this birth, and last, his worlds that he had worked tirelessly to keep apart were officially colliding which meant your safety was now and forever compromised.

Once his brain calmed from the rapid-fire panic, he sprung into action. He’d given clear instructions; Dave was to take you to the hospital in your car while Emily drove the work issued SUV back to Quantico to continue working the case. He told Reid to continue on and if anyone were to ask, inform them that he had a family emergency. While rushing out of work and to his car he called your closest friend/coworker who had been running the café since you’d been on maternity leave, he asked if she could pick up your kids and drop them off with him at the hospital after the shop closes at 2pm. She was quick to agree and wished you a safe birth and claimed she couldn’t wait to meet the 3 peanuts!

Everyone stepped up and went to work on their respective tasks. Dave and you had gotten to the hospital in record time. You were quickly settled in a room and made as comfortable as possible. Aaron arrived with about five seconds to spare. Dave gave him a pat on his shoulder and let him know that he’d be in the waiting room to sit with your kids once they arrived as well as to see his “godchildren”. He claimed it was his right as he was the only one who knew about your relationship. Emily arrived back at Quantico and led the team through the remainder of the case which thankfully was closed within the next hour thanks to that lead JJ and Morgan had been following up on.

The next few hours went by in a flash, the case was closed with families being reunited, Jack and Norah had been dropped off with Dave, Aaron had supported you through what was arguably the most difficult childbirth known to woman (naturally birthing triplets is not recommended nor is it necessarily the safest option – unfortunately you hadn’t had a choice given how far progressed your labor had been when you’d arrived at the hospital), and the BAU team patiently waited for the announcement of your safely completed birth…only that announcement didn’t come. They sat and waited for what felt like hours before Aaron finally came out. He explained that you had hemorrhaged after the babies were delivered, the doctor had told him it had something to do with the placenta having not come out completely. Dave could see how distraught Aaron was…he couldn’t handle not knowing.

Things happened so fast, one minute you were being congratulated on bringing three beautiful babies into the world and the next doctors were scrambling to stop the bleeding. You could feel yourself fading, you had reached out for Aaron, and you were able to hold his hand for a second before he was shooed out of the room. You were taken to surgery so they could effectively stop the bleeding and remove the rest of the placenta. Thankfully surgery hadn’t taken long (to Aaron it had felt like an eternity).

The doctor came out to inform him that you were okay and had been moved to a private room along with your newborns. She explained that you would feel weak for a bit but would make a full recovery. She also let Aaron know that he and the rest of your group could go back to see you as long as they remained at an appropriate volume and that any non-family was gone by 8pm as visiting hours would be over. Aaron looked to his team.

“I know that you are all probably expecting an explanation, and while I do want to give that to you…”

“You want to go see your wife and kids.” Morgan interrupted.

Aaron smiled at how understanding his team was. “Thank you, give us a few minutes alone, then I will come and get everyone.” Aaron said as he reached to pick up Norah with his left arm and grab Jack’s hand with his right.

The team agreed and discussed going to grab snacks and coffee from the cafeteria.

Aaron made his way to your room as quickly as he could with two young children. When he arrived, relief crashed over him in a tidal wave and tears sprung to his eyes. He walked to your bedside, gently placing Norah to sit at your feet. He’d instructed Jack to sit in the chair that was on the opposite side so he would be able to see his new siblings. Aaron leaned in to kiss your forehead all the while he could hear the quiet coo’s coming from the three infants, he walked over to them, and you couldn’t help but smile. As you brushed a hand through Norah’s hair and reached to cup Jack’s cheek, you could hear Aaron whisper to the babies “You just couldn’t wait to meet your family, could you?”.

Aaron and you spent a bit of time just like this, your family, taking turns holding the babies or carefully monitoring your older children while they tried to hold the babies. Norah was elated to have three live baby dolls, while Jack seemed happy that she’d have someone new to bother all the time. Aaron huffed a laugh at their reactions and then looked to you.

“Have you thought about their names anymore?”

“I have…I think after seeing them, and seeing you with them, that they just seem right.”

“Well then, are you ready to meet everyone?”

“Yes!”

With that, Aaron made his way to the waiting room. He could see how antsy his team looked, but he couldn’t delineate if it was from wanting to meet you and the babies or from wanting to hear the story. When he posed the question to them, they had all agreed they wanted to see you and the babies first, then the two of you could explain everything. So that is what led to Aaron leading his six teammates to your room; before entering, he turned to everyone with a finger over his lips signaling for them to enter quietly.

Everyone entered the room, their eyes scanning to see you and the kids chatting quietly. You had looked up and smiled, quietly greeting the group of people you had learned so much about over the last year and a half. Hugs and congratulations were exchanged throughout the room, babies being passed from person to person, chairs being brought in from the hallway. Once everyone was comfortable the room fell silent, you could tell they were waiting for name announcements and more information about you and Aaron. You figured names were an easier start and a much shorter conversation.

“Alright, I suppose it’s time for you all to formally meet these three. Aaron and I have thought long and hard about what to name them and it has proven difficult up until this point. When I saw them for the first time, it all became clear to me. So, without further ado, I’d like to introduce you to David Thomas Hotchner, Millie Joy Hotchner, and Faye Emilia Hotchner.”

There were “ooohs” and “awws” throughout the room and misty eyes (though Dave swears it was an eyelash) There was discussion of who would be the godparents of which baby and plans of baby shopping over the upcoming weekend to make sure they were spoiled by all their new aunts and uncles. The team started to pose some personal questions at you, like if you had siblings or family nearby and what you did for a living and how you met Hotch.

“I guess now’s as good a time as any” you said looking over at Aaron. “The story of us…”

[14buddy22]

Hey if you're looking for Hotch requests, what about Hotch dealing with a crush on a non-bau sunshine reader when he's still sad after the divorce/Foyet but he's so confused by his feelings because it's been so long that he doesn't know what's going on??

Like if it's case related, maybe he thinks reader is a suspect because why else would he be so on edge around her and it's just so painfully obvious to everyone else. Idk if that makes sense but I just think Hotch being so out of touch with his emotions despite being a profiler would be funny lol

Feel free to adapt and make it your own!! Thanks!!

Thanks for your request! I hope it lives up to your expectation!

You were the best damn bartender in Quantico, Virginia. At least, that's what you thought to yourself. You made work fun. You worked in a club environment so if you wore something scandalous, flirted with the customers a bit, you were sure to bring in a hefty tip at the end of the night.

But, you loved the hustle and bustle of it. You loved the interactions, loved singing along to the bands or the good music. You loved having conversations with the locals, loved celebrating parties for kids turning 21, people getting married, or hell, people getting divorced.

Then you met who you swore is your soulmate. Something in you stilled when you were bartending. You never froze up at your job. You were good at what you do. But seeing him walk through that door, looking all handsome in a suit, he took your breath away. You watched how he interracted with the bouncer.

You watched him show his badge to your best friend. FBI. An average Joe wouldn't just waltz into your bar, you knew he was a sophisticated man.

But when he locked eyes with you, you felt like the bar had heated up 100 degrees. Making his way over to you, you were trying to calm down. What had you feeling like this?

"Hi, I'm Agent Hotchner with the Behavioral Analysis Unit for the FBI. It's my understanding from the gentleman at the front that you are the lead bartender?"

You finished making your drink for one of the locals and asked your partner to manage the bar. Luckily it was early evening and the college kids had about another hour before they started flooding in so you knew you'd be okay leaving her by herself.

"Yes, I'm Y/n Y/L/N. It's nice to meet you. How can I help you?"

You shook his hand, and you swore you both held it for longer than you both intended.

All I could think was that she was beautiful. No, no, I can't think like that. My wife, ex-wife was brutally murdered a little over a year ago. Something's different talking to her, to-Y/n. Something I haven't felt in a while but I don't know what it is.

She's a bartender. I hear she's a damn good one. Maybe that's why she's about to be the suspect in a string of murders. Men have been killed shortly after they leave this bar. Traces of posion have come back on the tox screen. Bartenders have access to the drinks and alcohol before they serve, y/n's the perfect suspect.

But she's beautiful, and I haven't seen her stop smiling at all. She has a gorgeous smile. She'd be the sunshine on the rainiest days for the men that have been murdered. Before I know it, my thoughts and feelings consumed me, I'm still holding her hand. I could feel Dave's eyes burning a hole into me.

"Have you heard about the three men murdered around town?"

"Yeah, I have. It's very unfortunate. They were great men. At least to me. They tipped well and always had friendly conversations. They also stood up for me if some men coming in here for the first time were getting a little handsy with me."

Oh how I wished I could be the one to make sure no one got handsy with her. Wait, what am I saying? She's a suspect, she doesn't know it, but she is.

"How were they killed?"

Agent Hotchner's partner spoke up to answer your question.

"They were poisoned."

Ugh, these poor men. Had to die a slow pain, they didn't deserve it. They deserved justice now.

"We just wanted to come in to see if anything unusual has happened lately."

"I've seen a lot of crime shows with my ex-boyfriends before. You're really trying to see if I did it. Which I didn't. I don't think I have the heart to kill anyone. I broke up with my last ex because he hunted and I couldn't bare the thought of killing animals."

Of course you broke up with your ex because of that. But I have a job to do and I have to investigate further. Plenty of killers have lied straight to my face before.

"We'll be in touch Ms. Y/l/n, thank you for your time."

You smiled and shook their hands one last time before you went back to working your shift. Something about Aaron caught my eye. Maybe it's the way he was blushing like a school boy. You're not sure, but he was handsome.

Just when Aaron walked into the bar, you smiled at him, offering him a drink.

"Agent Hotchner, it's good to see you again."

Your smile never waivered. Maybe you would shoot your shot with him.

I can't believe I have to do this. Arrest someone this pretty. Arrest this girl who Rossi thinks I have feelings for. What? Feelings? That's an intense word, but I have to arrest her.

"Unfortunately I'm here to place you under arrest."

I watched all the color drain from her face. I watched her smile fall so fast. But it had to be her. Rossi and the team wasn't so sure, but I have a gut feeling it's her. Of course with it being my team, they weren't going to stop me. I took her sunshine away.

"Agent Hotchner, I, I didn't do anything."

Your manager saw what was going on, he was like your work dad. He took care of you like his daughter, despite him having sons, he treated you like his princess. You heard him say say, "Y/n, I'm getting you a lawyer, do not speak. I know you didn't do this. But I'll meet you where they're taking you."

You smiled back at him, tears filling your eyes. You wanted to make everyone happy, you never wanted to hurt anyone. How are you being arrested? You didn't do anything wrong.

Your ride back in Aaron's SUV was silent. How could you think he was your soulmate? Your soulmate would never arrest you. But you were still feeling something, you couldn't explain it.

I keep looking in the rearview mirror at her. I had to trust my gut. She poisioned those men. But why do I feel so guilty arresting her. From the time we had met her, been surveillencing her, up until I placed the handcuffs on her, she had smiled. Everyone spoke highly of her. I took away her sunshine. I did that.

As you walked into an interrogation room, Aaron sat you down in the seat, then took off your hand cuffs, handcuffing one hand to the table instead.

"We'll wait for your lawyer, do you need anything?"

"No."

You couldn't even look at him. How could her. You told him you didn't do it.

As I walked out, I was greeted with Penelope. "Sir, she has nothing on her record, not even a speeding ticket. I've looked through her social media posts and everyone spoke so highly of her. Friends were making special post to thank her for being a great friend. She took care of everyone. Sir, I-I know I'm not an agent, but I just can't believe it's her."

Penelope was cut off by my phone ringing, picking it up after viewing the caller I.D.

Morgan said, "Hotch, we got the wrong girl. It's Y/n's bartending partner. I just watcher her slip something into this guy's drink. I'm bringing her in, we can cut Y/n loose. You can be happy now. Y/n's not a killer. What that gut feeling is, is your feelings that you like her Hotch. You haven't felt that since Haley. I know it's been 20 years, but trust me man. Y/n is something special, according to the track record she has. She's the opposite of a killer. She's just the type of sunshine that you and Jack need in your life."

Aaron walked in and said, "I'm sorry, there has been a huge mistake. You are free to go. It was the other bartender you worked with.

"What? There's no way. She's amazing at what she does."

Aaron shook her head and said, "One of my agents was in the bar watching the entire time, he was undercover. He watched her slip something in another man's drink."

"Oh. Well, I'm glad you got the right killer. If, if you don't mind, can one of your agents give me a ride home? I don't have my car, obviously."

You didn't know how to feel. You knew you didn't do anything, but was Agent Hotchner always going to have a doubt in his mind that you were a killer?

You got in his car, this time sitting in the front seat. A storm was coming in, you enjoyed the rain and thunder, it calmed you. You two rode in silence, when he dropped you of at your apartment, he walked you up.

When you opened your door, you turned around to thank him, instead that didn't come out.

"I told you I didn't do it, ya know?"

"I know. I know. I'm sorry. I. There's something about you, y/n. I thought you were a suspect, but you should've never been one."

As your eyes were red and filled with tears, you looked at the man who you thought was your soulmate, instead, he had ruined you. Yes, you two didn't date, yes, you didn't hook up, but there was something there.

"Well then why the hell did you do this, Aaron? Why arrest me?"

"My ex-wife passed away a year ago. I haven't had feelings for anyone in nearly 20 years. My feelings for you confused me. I didn't know what I was feeling. I didn't know what these feelings were because I've been so out of touch with them. And it took me a minute to realize that these feelings are because I didn't think you were a killer, I thought you were beautiful. I think you're beautiful. But that gut feeling was that I think. I think I've found my soulmate."

As she stepped closer to me, I watched the sunshine fill her eyes again, her smile creeping up her face. God, was she beautiful and amazing, and from her friend's testimonies who I interviewed, she was a down right amazing person. Just the absolute sunshine to be around.

You were going to kiss Aaron. You were glad he figured out his feelings. This was going to be the start of something new. You didn't know what happened to his ex, you'd find out someday. You took the chance. You placed your hands on Aaron's hips and leaned in to kiss him. You were so happy that Aaron felt the same way. How did you know this? He placed his hands on your face and kissed you back like you were the only sunshine he'd ever see again.

[fortheloveofwonderland]

Me & You & Everyone We Know | Chapter 15 | SR

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Chapter Summary - As the summer begins, Spencer unexpectedly hits it off with a single mom he meets at the pool. The two of you separately try to navigate dating new people.

A/N - we’re just gonna let Spencer have a pseudo happy relationship for like a hot minute and let him realise he misses reader. This will not last forever, I promise.

Pairing - Single Dad! Spencer Reid / Fem! Reader

Category - hurt/comfort, angst with happy ending, smut minors DNI.

Warnings - moody teenager, Spencer and reader both trying to move on, Spencer trying to flirt, mentions of past abusive relationship, divorce, drunk driving and prison time (none of which pertain to Spencer or reader), mentions of age gap between consenting adults, out of control kids, overwhelmed Luke and Garcia, dog vomit, use of the word “bitch” quite a lot, making out.

WC - 5.9k

Chapter 15 - Happier

Ain't nobody hurt you like I hurt you,

But ain't nobody love you like I do.

Promise that I will not take it personal, baby,

If you're movin' on with someone new.

The BAU returned home from their case four days later and Luke called Spencer in regards to helping train his wayward dog. 

In those four days Spencer threw himself into summer activities with his daughters to stem his need for alcohol. 

On Monday the temperature skyrocketed suddenly, over ninety degrees which was unusual for Virginia. Even with the AC cranked up the house was like a sauna. So somewhat reluctantly he’d taken them to the local pool. 

And he got a whole lot more than he bargained for. 

Unsurprisingly the pool had been packed and he only managed to secure one deck chair but Lily and Daisy didn’t intend to sit with him anyway. 

He’d already slathered them in sunblock before they left the house but insisted on putting more on them when they arrived. 

Lily didn’t mind so much but Daisy fussed, uttering things like “god dad you’re so embarrassing” while he simply tried to stop her from burning in the sun. 

As soon as he was finished with them, they ran off towards the pool, leaving him alone on his sole deck chair. 

He rubbed some more sunblock on his face, arms and shins, the only skin exposed to the elements. He left his t-shirt on, not particularly enjoying the idea of being half naked around a packed pool full of strangers. 

He brought a bag full of books, given his reading speed he’d need them to stay entertained while his kids played in the pool. 

He settled back in the chair, laying his head back and swinging his legs up, plucking out the first book. 

It was noisy and busy, patrons packed in like sardines in a tin. It wasn’t exactly the relaxing summer vacation he’d had planned. 

The sun was hot and heavy in the sky and he already felt the sweat gathering at his temples.  

Kids ran rampant screaming and yelling at one another while fathers bellowed to their children to behave. With the exception of the beach, this was probably the last place he ever wanted to be. 

He opened the book to the first page while glancing out at the pool. Lily and Daisy were together in the shallow end, Daisy holding her little sister's hand. 

It made his heart swell. The girls had their problems from time to time but on the whole they got on really well. Daisy was always protective of her younger sibling, even if Lily annoyed her sometimes. 

He looked back at his book and started to read, glancing up at the girls every few minutes to ensure they were still ok. 

About twenty minutes passed before he felt like he was being watched. 

He frowned to himself, those old FBI instincts never leaving him. He closed his book and turned to his left. Low and behold there was someone on the chair beside him watching him intently.

“Sorry,” she blushed a little as Spencer regarded her. “I was amazed how deep in concentration you were given everything going on.” 

“Right,” he smiled, nodding his head. “Guess I’m good at switching off outside stimuli.” 

She smiled at him, a really pretty smile in Spencer’s opinion. She had dark, almost black hair which was tied up off of her face and dazzling blue eyes. 

“Lucky you, I wish I could do that.” She sat up, swinging her legs over the edge of her chair and Spencer found himself doing the same. “I’m Blair.” 

She held out her hand and Spencer shook it.

“Spencer.” He replied. 

“Which one is yours?” Blair nodded towards the pool. 

Spencer glanced around to see Daisy floating on her back in the water while her little sister spun herself around in circles, sending small waves crashing about. 

“The brunette in the red bathing suit and the little one with the curly hair spinning about.” He smiled at his girls. “Yours?” 

“Sitting on the edge, hasn’t taken his eyes off of your eldest.” She laughed. 

Spencer’s eyes gravitated towards a boy around Daisy’s age on the edge of the pool. His eyes, that looked just like his mothers, were staring directly at his daughter. 

He had a head of floppy dark hair, he looked to be tall even though he was sitting down. He awkwardly played with his hands in his lap whilst watching Daisy gracefully drift in the pool. 

“Maybe we’ll have to make an introduction.” Spencer laughed as he looked back at Blair. 

He did not miss the way her eyes glanced down to his left hand and he couldn’t help the way he returned the favour. 

“Single dad?” She asked with a slightly melancholy smile. 

“Yeah, me and their mom split up.” He nodded. “You?” 

“Cameron’s dad was…not a nice man.” She replied, pulling a face. 

Spencer could read between the lines. 

“Oh gosh, I’m so sorry.” Spencer rolled his lip between his teeth. 

“It’s ok. He’s not around anymore, hasn’t been for a long time.” She forced a smile and even if it wasn't genuine it was still so pretty. “We were going to go for ice cream after this. Maybe you and your girls want to join us? We could introduce Cameron and…”

“Daisy. And the little one is Lily.” 

“Cute names.” Blair smiled again and this time it was genuine. 

“Not my choice, but thanks.” He laughed dryly. “And yes to ice cream. I think it’s safe to say we would all really enjoy that.” 

“Great.” 

“Great.” Spencer repeated dumbly, getting a little lost in Blair's eyes. 

For the first time in a long time, Spencer felt something akin to decent. 

***

He and Blair spent the next hour talking about anything and everything, his bag of books long forgotten. 

She was the manager of an art gallery near DuPont circle, born and raised in the district. Her and her husband were high school sweethearts, marrying when they were just twenty two and having Cameron two years later. 

She explained as much as her ex having a temper which didn’t manifest until after Cameron was born. She described him as controlling and intimidating but Spencer could tell by the way she shrunk a little as she spoke about him that he’d been abusive. 

She said the last time she saw him was around the time Cameron turned ten, when he was being sentenced to prison time after a drunk driving incident where he’d killed two people. 

She’d sent divorce papers to his lawyer a month later. 

At thirty eight she was six years Spencer’s junior, but he’d always had a bit of a thing for a younger woman. It was certainly a pattern, both you and Maeve were younger than him which probably said all it needed to.

After a while, during a conversation about literature, Spencer felt a wet body suddenly wrapping around him from behind. 

“Daddy, I’m bored.” Lily threw her arms around his neck, cuddling into his back. 

“Hey pumpkin, where’s your sister?” He pulled her out from behind him and into his lap. 

Lily pointed over his shoulder to where Daisy was strolling towards them, a lanky young man at her side. 

He looked at Blair and they smiled at each other. 

“You make a friend, Daisy?” Spencer looked back at her. 

“Uh, yeah. This is Cam. This is my dad.” She rolled her eyes. 

“Daisy, Lily, this is Blair. Cameron’s mom. We were going to go for ice cream with them, how does that sound?” 

“Ice cream!” Lily screeched, wriggling in Spencer’s lap. 

He grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his giggling daughter. 

“Sure, why not?” Daisy shrugged like she couldn’t care less as did Cameron.

Typical teenagers, Spencer thought. 

He dried off Lily and had Daisy take her to the restrooms so they could both get changed. Cameron stayed as he hadn’t gone in the pool and didn’t have his wet clothes to change out of. 

Spencer and Blair packed up their things and once the girls were back they left their respective cars at the pool and walked the two blocks to the ice cream place. 

Daisy refused to sit with the adults and she and Cameron got their own table. Lily tried to sit with them too but her sister shooed her away. 

Pouting due to be shot down by Daisy, she grew clingy and snuggled right up to Spencer while she ate her ice cream. 

“Looks like they’re hitting it off.” Blair spoke between mouthfuls of her scoop, nodding towards the two teens. 

“Looks that way.” Spencer nodded, feeling Lily’s ice cream dripping onto his shorts. “Lil, sweetheart, be careful please.” 

“Sorry daddy.” She pouted. 

Spencer and Blair continued to chat while Lily sulked by her dads side and the teens kept to themselves. 

After a while Daisy appeared by their table, arms folded across her chest. 

“Can we go to the pool again tomorrow?” She asked him. 

“Can I assume Cameron is going to the pool tomorrow?” He teased her. 

“Dad shut up!” She huffed. “You’re so embarrassing.” 

“Was I going to be consulted?” Blair asked her son as he joined them. 

Cameron shrugged, looking equally the part of moody teenager as Daisy did. 

“I thought we were going to the Smithsonian tomorrow? There was that exhibit you wanted to look at.” Spencer asked his daughter. 

“No, that sounds lame.” She shook her head. 

“I don’t think it sounds lame.” Cameron nudged her arm gently. 

“No?” She smiled at him, practically giving him heart eyes. 

“Can we go too mom?” Cameron turned to Blair. 

“As long as they don’t mind the company, I don’t see why not.” Blair’s eyes sparkled as she looked at Spencer and Spencer smiled a little bashfully. 

“That would be great.” He nodded. 

“Gross, get a room.” Daisy scoffed, turning and skulking off again, Cameron close behind. 

“Please never grow up.” He whispered to Lily, placing a kiss on her head. 

“Ok daddy.” She nodded, mouth smeared with her mint choc chip. 

***

Spencer and Blair exchanged numbers before going their separate ways. On Tuesday the five of them met up at the Smithsonian. 

As was expected, Daisy and Cameron went on ahead while Spencer, Blair and Lily strolled behind them. 

Conversation with Blair flowed easily, as if he’d known her his whole life. They had a lot in common, including being single parents with issues towards their exes. 

Maybe she was exactly what Spencer needed. It was nice to talk to someone who understood him, who understood where he’d been. Blair took his mind off everything going on in his life, eased his troubles with her smile. 

They ended up spending the whole day together, it seemed to go by in the blink of an eye. As the kids were getting into their cars, Spencer and Blair hung back. 

“I had a really nice time today.” She smiled that easy smile at him and he reciprocated. 

“So did I.” He agreed.

“I wondered if maybe you’d be interested in doing something again. Maybe without the kids?” She shrugged shyly. 

“I would like that a lot.” He nodded. “The girls only go to their moms every other weekend but I can get a sitter.” 

“When were you thinking?” 

“As soon as humanly possible?” He confessed which made her laugh. 

“Eager?” She chuckled lightly, a sound Spencer really enjoyed. 

“Maybe a little.” He laughed too. “My friends have pretty demanding jobs though and they're out of state at the moment. The minute they’re back I can get one of them to sit the girls and I’d love to take you to dinner.” 

“Sounds perfect.” Blair nodded, stepping a little closer and placing a gentle kiss on Spencer’s cheek. “See you soon, Spencer.”

“You most certainly will.” He swallowed, watching her get into her car before he moved towards his own. 

He smiled the whole drive home. 

***

On Wednesday he and the girls stayed home. The temperature dropped a few degrees and they mostly played in the yard with Taco. 

On Thursday Daisy went to the mall with Meredith and Meredith’s mother so Spencer took Lily and Taco to the park. 

In the evening Luke called to tell him they’d arrived back from their case and arranged to come over on Friday to help with his dog problems. 

“One more thing,” Spencer said before Luke had a chance to hang up. 

“Shoot,” Luke replied. 

“I don’t suppose you and Garcia want some quality time with the girls tomorrow night do you?” 

“Sick of them already? Man, it's gonna be a long summer.” Luke laughed. 

“It’s not that.” Spencer chewed his lip. 

“Oh,” Luke read between the lines. “You and Y/N make up?” 

Spencer hated the way his chest tightened hearing your name and tried to ignore it. 

“Uh, not exactly.” He sighed. “I might have met someone else.” 

“Jeez, you’re like a woman magnet recently.” Luke laughed. “How are you finding these women?”

“I met her at the pool. She’s a single mom and she’s great, really great. We’ve hung out with the kids but I want to take her dinner.” 

“Sure, Garcia and I can come by and look after the girls.” 

“Or…” Spencer chewed his lip again. “They could come to your place?” 

There were a few moments of silence in which Luke was once again reading between the lines. 

“Right,” the older man started to laugh again. “Can’t bring a date home when you’ve got kids there. Got it.” 

“That makes me sound like an ass.” Spencer sighed. “But you know, on the off chance that’s on the cards…”

“They can come to my place. I’ve got the guest room so I’d they don’t mind sharing then it’s no issue for me.” 

“Have I told you that you are the best?” 

“Not lately, no.” Luke rolled his eyes. 

“Well, you are. Oh and please don’t tell anyone.” 

Luke chuckled to himself, shaking his head before he responded. 

“See you tomorrow, lover boy.” 

***

You stood on the curb outside of the restaurant, hugging your arms around your waist whilst thinking, not for the first time tonight, why am I doing this? 

It was your first official date with Sam, your old college friend and now you were here you didn’t know why. 

The two of you had been close in college and you’d always had a little crush on him. He was smart and handsome and charming but you’d always remained just friends. After college you’d lost touch. 

When you’d bumped into each other a few weeks ago you’d picked back up like no time had passed. You’d had dinner as friends, gotten coffee a few times but then he’d asked you out on a date. 

If you’d never met Spencer, going on a date with your college crush would have been like all your wildest dreams come true. But you had met Spencer, and along the way forgotten all about Sam. 

And now you were outside of the restaurant, looking in on him through the window, this was the last place in the world you wanted to be.

You liked Sam, there was still a spark between you. But he wasn’t Spencer. 

As you were considering turning and leaving, calling him and telling him you’d come down with something, he spotted you through the window. 

He waved at you and offered you that devilishly attractive smile and you waved back, trying to push down all thoughts of Spencer as you forced yourself inside. 

He stood as soon as you neared the table and pulled you into his strong arms. His musky cologne smelt delicious and for a moment you were able to cast Spencer Reid from your mind. 

“You look absolutely beautiful.” Sam beamed at you as he pulled away. 

“Thank you.” You blushed a little, smoothing down the front of your sunflower yellow sundress. 

Sam held your chair out for you and you slid into it, making yourself comfortable while he made his way to his own seat. 

“I ordered a bottle of Merlot, I hope that’s ok? I remember it being your favourite.” 

“Wow, good memory.” You smiled a little nervously. 

“I never forgot a single thing about you.” He confessed, placing his napkin in his lap. “I had the biggest crush on you in college.” 

“You did?” Your mouth fell open. 

“Oh come on, I wasn’t exactly subtle.” He chuckled. 

“I honestly had no idea. I wish I had, because I also had a huge crush on you.” You felt your cheeks burning. 

“Well damn,” Sam laughed, shaking his head. “I guess we have a lot of lost time to make up for.” 

“I guess so.” You nodded as your wine was brought over. 

You perused your menus and soon ordered, and the two of you fell into comfortable conversation. That is until the topic of your dating history was brought up. 

Sam admitted he’d dated a lot but never managed to settle down. When he turned the question back to you, you took a large sip of wine as Spencer reentered your brain. 

“Honestly I haven’t really dated all that much. I was busy I guess. There was one guy, more recently, but it didn’t work out.” You chewed awkwardly on the inside of your cheek. 

“The professor?” 

“Huh?”

“You mentioned the professor you were working for, Reid? I noticed you got a little uncomfortable when you spoke about him and I wondered if there was a history.” Sam was smiling at you but you couldn’t return it. 

“Yeah that was him.” You took another sip of wine. “He was…complicated. Two kids, an ex-wife who he was most certainly still in love with even though he would pretend otherwise.” 

“Jeez,” Sam pulled a face. “That is complicated.” 

“Tell me about it.” You sighed.

“Well, I’m just about as uncomplicated as they come.” He shot you one of those smiles that always made your knees a little weak. 

“I like uncomplicated.” You smiled back. 

“And I like you.” He slid his hand across the table and threaded his fingers with your own. 

And when he touched you like that, Spencer was once again the furthest thing from your mind. 

***

Luke made some progress with Taco which was more than Spencer expected. After a few gruelling hours the dog was responding to the commands of sit and stay which was impressive if you asked Spencer. 

Luke told him it wouldn’t be easy, Taco wasn’t a puppy and therefore wouldn’t be as easy to train but Luke was certainly up to the challenge. 

When the evening rolled around Spencer got ready for his date and Luke took the girls and Taco back to his place where Penelope was meeting them. 

Spencer was strangely nervous as he got ready, but not necessarily in a good way. He remembered the excitement he felt on his first date with you and this was nothing like that. 

Perhaps he knew this wasn’t right. Deep down something was telling him he shouldn’t go ahead with this. His own mental health and his kids needed to be his priority, he needed to focus on bettering himself for the girls. 

But you’d made him realise just how lonely he was. And now he remembered what it was like to have someone he couldn’t stand the thought of being alone again. Even if it wasn’t you keeping him company. 

He pushed down his nerves and thoughts of you, it wasn’t conducive and therefore he didn’t need to be plagued by it. 

He finished getting ready, fighting his daily battle with his perpetually messy hair, before jumping in his car and heading out to meet Blair. 

***

The first stumbling block happened within a few minutes of sitting down in the restaurant when Blair asked him if he wanted to get a bottle of wine. 

He couldn’t very well admit to a woman whose husband was arrested for drunk driving that he was recovering from alcohol abuse. Instead he tried to talk his way out of it. 

“I’m driving so it’s probably best I don’t drink.” He chewed the inside of his cheek. 

“Ok, just a glass then?” She smiled at him and he melted a little, almost agreeing because a glass of wine really would help take the edge off. 

But he couldn’t, he wouldn’t. 

“You know, I’ve not been feeling a hundred percent today so I think I’m going to just stick to water. Please have whatever you want though.” He insisted, trying to deflect.

“Oh, we could have rescheduled.” She pulled a face. 

“It’s ok, I’m fine. I just don’t think alcohol would be a good idea.” That wasn’t a lie, alcohol would not be a good idea.

He felt like he dodged a bullet when she didn’t mention it any further. But the second stumbling block came after they had ordered their food.

“So I told you about my ex, you didn’t really tell me about yours.” She smiled sweetly, no idea the can of worms she was opening with that statement.

Spencer sipped his water, trying to pretend it was scotch but failed and was left disappointed.

“Uh, well, let’s see,” he took another sip. “We were married for thirteen years but for the last three of those, she was cheating on me.” He thought it best to just rip it off like a bandaid.

“Oh gosh,” Blair frowned around her wine glass. “That’s horrible.”

“I mean, it's nothing in comparison to what you’ve been through but yeah, it certainly wasn’t great.” 

“I figured something must have happened because you said the girls only see her every two weeks.”

“I tried to fight for full custody if I’m honest.” He shrugged with a sigh. “But she is still their mom.” 

“When did you split up, if you don’t mind me asking?” She swirled her wine around in her glass. 

“A little over a year ago. It’s been tough but my girls are resilient.” 

“And you?” Her eyes sparkled a little. 

Was he going to make the same mistake with you and lie about his feelings? He didn’t see the point if he was honest. He’d lied to you because he didn’t want to freak you out, to cause you to end things before they’d really begun. But if he scared off Blair he wasn’t sure it would be the end of the world. 

“Honestly, I’m still working through some stuff. It took me a long time to admit even to myself that I was hurt by what she did. I’m still processing my feelings, and if that’s not what you want to hear I’m sorry. But we were married for a long time and it is still kinda fresh.” He exhaled, took another sip of water.

“People think because they’re the ones who did the terrible thing that you should be glad to be rid of them.” She half-smiled. “As you’ve probably figured out, my ex was abusive and all my friends told me I should be happy to finally be out of that relationship. But they didn’t get it. No one does.

We had so many good times in the early years, he was so wonderful to me and I loved him so much. But then his job started getting on top of him and he started drinking and the alcohol made him angry. For the most part I was relieved that it was over but there’s still a part of me even now that misses him, misses…” she trailed off and swallowed but Spencer knew exactly what she wanted to say.

“You miss what you used to have.” He filled in the blanks. “I understand. Me and my ex had some really good times too and it’s hard to just forget all of that and hate her completely for what she did. She gave me Daisy and Lily and a part of me will always love her for that. People don’t understand though, not unless they’ve been there.” 

“Wow,” she smiled a little shakily. “It’s so nice to meet someone who gets it.” 

“It really is.” He agreed with his own smile. 

Spencer had in one capacity or another felt misunderstood his entire life. But the way Blair was looking at him made him feel seen for the first time. 

It allowed him to loosen up, to relax enough to enjoy his evening. He’d only ever wanted someone to understand and he felt like he finally found that in Blair. 

***

Luke Alvez leant against the kitchen counter, pinching the bridge of his nose with his eyes closed. 

The sound of the two girls was more than enough, he didn’t need to witness what was going on as well. 

Penelope had been gone for twenty minutes to shower and in that time, all hell seemed to have broken loose. 

When she emerged from the bedroom, dressed in her brightly coloured pyjama bottoms and matching tank top, she froze in the doorway at the scene in front of her. 

Roxy was hiding away in the corner whilst Taco was being held rather precariously under Lily’s arm. She was spinning the poor dog around in circles, jumping up and down on Luke’s couch and scream-singing at the top of her lungs.

Daisy had her head in her phone, narrowly avoiding Lily jumping on her and Garcia could see the anger rising on the older girl's face. 

She looked over at Luke in the open plan kitchen and his closed eyes before storming towards him.

“I was gone for twenty minutes!” She slapped his bicep. “What did you do?”

“Me?” He opened his eyes and looked at his girlfriend. “I did nothing!” 

“Uncle Luke made hot cocoa!” Lily screeched. 

“Did he now?” Penelope frowned at him. “And how much sugar exactly did you put in it?” 

“Lots of sugar!” Lily squealed again. 

“I swear to god Lily if you hit me one more time!” Daisy spat her at her sister, looking up from her phone. 

“Daisy’s texting a boy!” Lily giggled.

Honestly, Taco had the patience of a saint because he didn’t seem at all disturbed by being bounced around the way he was. 

“I am not! Shut up!” Daisy growled. 

“Are too!” Lily replied, jumping off the couch and landing on the floor. “Daisy and Cameron sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G!” 

“Shut up you brat!” Daisy tossed her phone aside and got up, advancing on her sister. 

Luke suddenly jumped into action and crossed the room in barely three strides.

“Whoa!” He lightly placed his hand on Daisy’s shoulder. “Please don’t hurt your sister.” 

“She’s being a bitch!” Daisy huffed. 

“Hey now,” Penelope hurried over. “You do not use language like that.” 

“All my friends say it.” She rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest. 

“Daddy says it too!” Lily chimed in, thankfully putting Taco down and he scurried over to Roxy. “I heard him call mommy a bitch. What does it mean?” 

“It means-”

“Nothing.” Luke cut Daisy off. “It doesn’t mean anything. But we shouldn’t be saying it ok? It’s an adult word.” 

“Ok!” Lily shrugged, going back to jumping up and down. “I’m a rabbit!” 

“No you’re not you’re a bit-”

“Do not finish that sentence young lady.” Penelope snapped. She hated being strict but Luke was such a softy she often had to be the bad guy. “Girls enough of this. Daisy, you will not call your sister that word. In fact you will not call anyone that word. And Lily, if your sister is texting a boy leave her to it. She’s fourteen, she’s allowed to text a boy. I think. Does your dad know you’re texting a boy?” 

“Dads met him.” She shrugged, not exactly answering the question. “And he’s on a date with Blair, Cam’s mom right now.” 

“He’s…he’s…” she turned to Luke who was trying to shrink away. “You said he was out with JJ and Will?” 

“Uh…” Luke grabbed her hand and led her towards the kitchen. “He told me not to tell anyone.” 

“Even me?” She tried to keep her tone quiet. “How does Daisy know and I didn’t?” 

“She’s Reid’s kid, she’s as smart as a whip.” Luke whispered. 

“I thought he was…is he incapable of being single?” 

“I don’t know what’s going on with him to be honest. I’m kinda worried about him.” Luke admitted. 

“Me too.” Penelope pouted. 

“Give it back, you bitch!” Daisy yelled, garnering their attention.

“Daisy and Cameron sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N…OW!” Lily screamed.

Penelope and Luke ran back into the room to find Lily on the floor, violently sobbing and Daisy standing over her with a slightly smug look on her face.

“What did you do?” Garcia asked the older girl while Luke picked Lily up in his arms and cradled her. 

“She took my phone!” Daisy stamped her foot. 

“She pushed me!” Lily wailed. 

“It’s ok sweetheart, it’s ok. Let’s lie down.” Luke cooed as he carried her through to his guest room. 

“You do not push your sister, Daisy. You know that.” Penelope sighed. 

“She’s just such a bitch!” 

“For the love of all that is sparkly you have to stop saying that word.” Garcia groaned. “You get a time out, come on.” 

She took Daisy’s wrist in her hand and led her to Luke’s bedroom. She opened the door and motioned her inside.

“Phone,” she held out her hand. 

“No way.” Daisy scoffed. 

“Daisy Diana Reid, give me your phone right now before I call your father.” Penelope growled at the young girl. 

Daisy pulled a face, similar to her dad when he was upset. She let out a breath and placed the device in Penelope’s hand. 

“Thank you. Now go sit down and think about what you did.” Garcia closed the door on Daisy and padded back to the couch where she flopped down.

Luke emerged from the guest room a few minutes later alone and joined her. 

“I know we’ve only just started dating but can I say I don’t think I ever want kids.” He ran his fingers through his hair. 

“Right now I’m gonna have to agree with you.” Penelope nodded. 

Luke closed his eyes and took a moment to relish the quiet. But it was very short lived as soon there was a gagging sound coming from the corner of the room. 

Both of them looked over just in time to see Taco, the previous activities having caught up on him, vomit all over the carpet. 

“I’ll get the cleaning supplies.” Penelope sighed loudly, getting back to her feet. 

“I’ll call Reid.” 

***

“I had a really great time tonight.” Sam glanced at you with a smile as you walked side by side down the street towards your apartment. 

“I did too.” You nodded.

And it was true, you really did have a wonderful time with Sam. Conversation had flowed easily between the two of you, like it had back in college. 

So you didn’t have quite the same level of intellectual debate as you did with Spencer. At least Sam was your own age, even if that didn’t necessarily mean you had more in common. 

He walked you to your door like a gentleman and you turned to face him on the street. He was smiling down at you, eyes sparkling. 

“Would I completely blow my chances of a second date if I kissed you?” He asked somewhat shyly. 

“I’d say it would greatly increase your chances of a second date if you were to kiss me.” You smiled. 

“Oh thank god.” He chuckled, his nerves melting away. 

He stepped closer to you and cupped your face before drawing you in for a tender kiss. It was nice. But it was missing the kind of passion you had with Spencer. 

It wasn’t frantic and demanding like Spencer's kisses. It didn’t make your knees buckle or the air leave your lungs. 

It was nice. But it wasn’t the same. 

Sam pulled back and he was smiling brightly at you, you tried your best to return it. 

“I have waited so long to do that.” He laughed. 

“I hope it was worth the wait.” 

“Most definitely.” 

You looked over your shoulder at your building before looking back at him, knowing what you were about to say was an utterly stupid idea. But you said it nonetheless.

“My roommates are out. Do you wanna come inside?” 

It didn’t take someone with Spencer’s IQ to figure out what you meant and judging by the look on Sam’s face he knew exactly what you were getting at. 

“I would love that. But are you sure?” 

In response you simply took hold of his hand and led him up the stairs of your building. You were determined to get Spencer out of your head no matter the cost. 

***

After dinner, Spencer held the door of the restaurant open for Blair to exit first and she thanked him with a smile. 

They stepped out onto the street and she turned to him. 

“I never do this.” She laughed lightly. “I never go on dates.” 

“Yeah,” he rolled his lips between his teeth, remembering telling you the same. 

“Say, I don’t want to be too forward but I’ve been single a long time so I’m just going to go for it. I would really like to kiss you.” She blushed at her own words and Spencer thought it was incredibly endearing. 

“I would also very much like to kiss you.” He agreed, moving closer and cupping her face. 

He kissed her and she melted against him, gasping a little at the sensation in which Spencer took the initiative to guide his tongue into her mouth. 

She wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him close while he deepened the kiss. And he tried not to think about you. 

By the time the kiss broke they were both panting slightly and she was smiling at him, eyes sparkling. 

“My kids are staying with their uncle tonight,” he blurted out. “So I have a free house. If it’s not too bold of me to say.” 

“It is kind of bold.” She laughed. “But I like it.” 

He smiled and kissed her again, hoping if he took her home he would banish all thoughts of you aside. But as he kissed her, his phone started to ring. 

He pulled back reluctantly and offered Blair an apologetic smile, pulling the device from his pocket and seeing Luke’s name on the screen. 

“Sorry I should get this, it could be about my girls.” 

“Of course, go ahead.” She nodded and Spencer took a few steps away before answering the phone. 

“Is everything ok?” He instantly went into panic mode. 

“Uh, not exactly.” Luke sighed. “Lily was hopped up on sugar and annoying Daisy. Daisy kept calling her a…b-i-t-c-h and then she pushed Lily and now Lily won’t stop crying. And your dog was sick everywhere.” 

Spencer exhaled sharply, closing his eyes as he let the information wash over him. 

“I’ll be right there.” He grumbled. 

“Sorry man. We tried.” 

“See you soon.” Spencer sighed again, hanging up the phone, moving back towards Blair. “I’m so sorry, my kids have gone rogue. Can we have a rain check?” 

“Sure and don’t worry about it. One’s hard enough as a single parent, I can’t imagine having two.” 

“It’s like having one, only ten times as hard.” He laughed dryly. “I’ll call you.”

He leaned in and placed a chaste kiss on her cheek and watched as she headed down the street to hail a cab. Soon he was turning in the opposite direction and speed walking towards his car. 

Was it too much to ask just to have one night to himself? He loved his girls, more than anything else in the world, but sometimes they made his life harder than he ever could have prepared for. 

@andiebeaword @muffin-cup @measure-in-pain @takeyourleap-of-faith @ssa-uglywhore27 @dreatine @thebloomingeagle @this-is-doctor-and-its-calm @matthew-gray-gubler-lover @justreadingficsdontmindme @spencer-reid-wonderland @foxy-eva @kbakery @simxican @aysixdy @givemeth @loonalockley @shamelessfangirl-3 @derekm24 @pinkiceee-prose @werewolfbansheelove @mindbelova @angelicasworld

[aclaywrites]

Elated, excited, thrilled, overjoyed. My friends got married. I got married. Then I got gay divorced but that’s ok too because we had legal protections for ourselves and each other and our child.

How will you feel when same sex marriage is made illegal? Like when Roe v Wade was overturned? When Loving v Virginia is overturned? When women stop being able to vote and people with disabilities are asked to stay home to keep others from being uncomfortable? How will you feel if you know you were part of that?

Vote. Vote blue. Vote local. If you actually care about people then vote.

[compacflt]

Watched Marriage Story today, for the very first time, and had a lotta thoughts about EDTS Ice and Mav, especially their divorce-era. Wondered whether they would’ve genuinely gotten a divorce, if they’d somehow been married at that point. Charlie kinda reminded me of Ice: the benign belief in his own intellectual superiority, the self-pity, the willful blindness towards the reality of his relationship, the selfishness—not in the sense that Ice wasn’t kind or warm or loving, but in the sense that he really needed things to go his way (for them to not talk about anything). Of course Mav was no Nicole, he definitely shared his half of the blame, but I could totally imagine the two of ‘em having a huge fight that devolved into: “I can’t believe I have to know you … forever!” ‘Cause they kinda did: being in the Navy, moving around in the same circles, sharing an estranged kid they were both hoping to make-up with…

ok so part one of this ask not having seen marriage story: yeah i am 100% sure if they’d codified their relationship in words they would’ve broken up. like forever. letting all that anger simmer instead of boiling over is sometimes a blessing in disguise—if you say you’re together, you’re together. if you say you’re over, you’re over. no take-backsies on something like that. whereas if you don’t talk about any of it, the boundaries are a lot less definite. a blessing in disguise. i did (for mental torture purposes, and also for a prompt fill i [sorry to whomever sent it in] didnt hate myself enough to write) brainstorm that Bad Ending—if, say, Mav HAD been reckless and decisive and told ice “get the fuck out of my house obviously this isn’t gonna work you betrayed my trust & bailed on me at the second lowest moment of my life & conspired with a dying woman who is in love with you to ruin our son’s life in the exact same way MY life was once ruined and you blame me for turning you gay but you were already gay to begin with and You Fucking Killed My Best Friend And We Never Talk About It so fuck you we’re done” and went no-contact and threw ices shit out into the street and never went back to the hangar and changed all the locks and his phone number etc. and… say ice is like decimated for a few years straight, like numbingly and crushingly depressed, & then he meets not-his-sister-sarah and tells her the truth (that now he can realize with the benefit of hindsight & grief & loss—funny how loss always makes everything real clear all of a sudden): that he was in a long term relationship with a man with whom he was raising a child & with whom he was probably in love, and she marries him anyway, and obviously she’s not maverick and she doesn’t make him as happy as he did and she knows that but at least she stops him from being actively su*cidal and at least they can be open about their relationship in public and maybe they have a kid or two, and maybe he completely shifts his strategy and relocates to Virginia and moves his AOR to the atlantic instead of the pacific so he can get as far away from San Diego and maverick and home as possible, and maybe it works, and maybe there are some days he doesn’t even think about maverick or Bradley or goose, and when people mention the 1990s he grimaces and tries to forget, and he’s not ashamed of it so much as he is hurt by the memory of his own carelessness, and maybe he cries often and very very quietly, and maybe he gets his life back on track and before he knows it he has four stars on the opposite coast from the one he’d originally planned, and of course he’s not happy, but he’s never happy, so whatever.

Until. some event he can’t get out of. A mutual friend’s change of command ceremony or retirement ceremony or funeral. first thing he sees (like always) is captain Mitchell shining in his dress blues (like always). they avoid each other all evening, why bother trying? until someone forces them together, “weren’t you two at TOPGUN together? didn’t you guys kill all those soviets together?” and on and on, yes, we were, this is very very uncomfortable, until eventually they’re alone, and maverick asks, “can i buy you a drink sir?” but he’s staring at ice’s left hand and staring and staring, and it’s been over a decade but still ice doesn’t know how to say no to him, so they leave this joint and get a drink somewhere else, and maverick says, “how long have you been married,” and ice says, “eight years next march,” and you can see maverick doing the math in his head 2016-8=2008 okay, “what’s her name,” “sarah,” maverick laughs but feels bad for laughing, ice says, “we have a couple kids,” maverick stops laughing. “shit,” maverick says. ice says, “it was very difficult for me for a very long time;” maverick says, “what did you tell her;” ice says, “the truth;” maverick waits a second to respond and then says, “and what was the truth?” ice tells him the truth which is “well that i was in a long-term relationship with another man and we were raising a kid together and most likely we were in love with each other but it didn’t work out.” maverick takes a long time to respond to that and is blinking a lot and if you put your ear to his chest you’d hear that he is struggling to breathe. he says “and she married you anyway.” “she did.” he says “and You married Her anyway.” “i did.” Ice pauses then says “it was very difficult for me for a very long time.” he pauses some more and drinks and watches disinterestedly as maverick blinks and blinks. then ice says “so uh are you…?” maverick says “ive had a couple… a couple flings… nothing. nothing like.” and ice understands. maverick says, “why didn’t you tell me?” “tell you what?” “that you. that you and i were. that you felt that way about me.” ice says, “i did. i tried. i left you voicemails & sent you postcards & tried for half a decade to get in touch with the kid. did you not get my—did you not get my voicemails or my letters?” maverick blinks and blinks and says “i did get them but i didn’t open them;” ice says “well that’s that then.” and drinks. maverick says “how long after me did you meet her;” ice says “a couple years, i was deployed for O.I.F.” maverick says, “yeah, me too.” and he almost starts crying. he says “ice I’m sorry but you’re telling me ive completely wasted the last decade of my life and i don’t know what to do. do you love her? does she make you happy?” ice says “yes” and “yes.” maverick says “does she make you as happy as you were with me?” ice doesn’t care enough anymore to be dishonest and says “no. Of course not. but she made life easier when it was very difficult for me for a very long time.” maverick says, “run away with me. fuck it. let’s try again. let’s start over. no one else understands. come on. you and me. we always come back to each other. let’s try again.” and it is very very tempting. One of those watershed moments when life goes crystal clear and you can see through it. but only for a moment. ice is so tired and too old for that kind of adventure anymore. he says, i have kids, and i have a wife, and i have the navy and my four stars to think of, and i— he can be honest about this: “i want to. you know i do.” he pauses. doesn’t think he wants maverick to touch him. that can’t possibly end well and historically has not ended well. flinches away when maverick reaches out. he says “but i can’t.” maverick says, “i miss you more than anything. i want—even still!—i—please…I can’t…” another pause. ice says, “Let me get the bill, Mav.” so ice pays mavericks tab and they go their separate ways.

and maverick goes out to the desert to fly the sr-72 darkstar and pushes it beyond its limits on purpose and he doesn’t intend to survive but it’s his stupid too-good instincts that have him popping the cockpit escape pod ejection handle, and he lives by accident, like always, and destroys several billion taxpayer dollars in an instant, and without admiral Kazansky on his six backing him up admiral Cain has everything he needs to dishonorably discharge captain mitchell from the navy, so after 33 years of service to his country and 3 air to air kills maverick is unceremoniously dishonorably discharged and they kick him out without a second thought, and the Dagger special mission command goes to someone else and Bradley gets team leader and probably fails and probably dies, and atlantic fleet commander Tom Kazansky is offered the promotion to chief of naval operations and takes it, and doesn’t live long enough to meet his grandchildren, and that’s about all i have to say about that.

Now im going to go watch marriage story to answer this ask educatedly so hold on.

ok coming back the next day post marriage story and yeah you’re right i think it would look like that

[missmcspooks]

SURVIVING ABDUCTION: Lisa McVey

Lisa McVey was a 17 year old girl who was abducted and raped by a serial killer in 1984. This woman is one of the smartest survivors I’ve ever learned about, as she was able to manipulate her captor into setting her free. I strongly recommend watching the movie based on this case, called “Believe Me.” 

Who Is Lisa McVey?

Lisa was born in March of 1967, in Tampa, Florida. She had a really hard time growing up, as her mother, who was addicted to drugs and alcohol, forced her to move in with her grandmother and grandmother's boyfriend at 14. Prior to this, she was in and out of foster homes. Her grandmother’s boyfriend would molest her often for three years straight, while holding a gun to her head, and her grandmother never did anything to stop it. It’s because of this abuse that helped aid in her survival when she met serial killer and rapist, Bobby Joe Young. She knew how to handle herself in those situations, and she knew how to keep herself alive. Due to her abuse at home, she had planned to commit suicide after work that very same night she was abducted. Ironically, once she was in that life or death situation, she suddenly had the will to live, and decided it wasn’t time for her to die. 

Who Was Bobby Joe Long?

Bobby was born on October 14th, 1953, in Kenova, West Virginia, and moved to Tampa in 1983. He was a serial killer and rapist who targeted women in the Tampa Bay area, and killed at least 10 women. He was born with an extra X chromosome, also known as 47,XXY, a specific variant of Klinefelter syndrome. This condition results in excessive estrogen production, causing some female traits such as breast development. Due to this condition, he was teased as a child for his large breasts and underwent breast reduction surgery when he was a teenager. He had also suffered multiple head injuries as a child resulting from diverse accidents. He married his high school girlfriend in 1974 and had two kids with her before she filed for divorce in 1980. Bobby Joe committed at least 50 rapes in Miami. Whenever he was with a woman alone, he’d go to the bathroom to take out his “rape kit,” come back, and rape and rob the woman. He was convicted of rape in 1981 but requested a new trial and somehow the charges were dropped. After moving to Tampa in 1984, he spent eight months on a murder spree. 

Lisa McVey’s Abduction

On November 3rd, 1984, Lisa was riding home from work on her bicycle when she was found and snatched by Bobby Joe. She was thrown into the backseat of his car, held at gunpoint, blindfolded, bound, and raped. She was then brought to his apartment and repeatedly raped and tortured for the next 26 hours. Due to her experience with abuse, Bobby noticed that she wasn’t like the others. She didn’t try to run, she didn’t scream, she didn’t cry, and she obeyed. Later he would say that Lisa was “different.” Lisa relied on her memory and her ability to keep an eye out on specific details. How many turns were made from her abduction point, what she was able to see under her blindfold, the kind of car, the color of the cars interior, how many steps were taken up to his apartment, how his face felt, what his dominant hand was, that he was extremely clean (he made her shower once she was in his apartment), where his boots were placed, etc. Additionally, as part of her manipulation tactic, she tried to sympathize with him by telling him that he wasn’t really such a bad person, that she saw good in him and that he deserved to be loved, and even offered to be his secret girlfriend. Then, she tried to gain sympathy from him by telling him that she really needed to survive, as she is her fathers sole caregiver, and he was very sick and needed her. This was the final straw that persuaded him to let her go. He drove her to a remote location while blindfolded and told her to keep the blindfold on for 5 minutes so he could get away. 

When she returned home, she was scolded and beaten by her grandmother's boyfriend, and neither of them initially believed her story. It took them 5 hours before finally calling the police. What makes matters worse, most of the officers didn’t believe her story either for some reason, besides one officer in particular. She told the police all the information she had, and even made sure she left fingerprints in multiple areas of the bathroom to prove that she was really there. Through her description of the man and the details of the route they took, they were able to find Bobby Joe’s apartment, and went to hunt him down. He was found on November 16th, 1984, at a movie theater looking for a sex worker. He killed two more women before he was caught. He said that the police never would’ve found him if he didn’t let her live. On September 23rd, 1985, he pleaded guilty to his kidnapping and assault of Lisa McVey, and to an additional eight counts of first degree murder, eight counts of kidnapping, and seven counts of sexual battery. He received life sentences on every count in Hillsborough County. Additionally, he received two death sentences for the murders of Michelle Denise Simms and Virginia Johnson. 

He was executed by lethal injection on May 23rd, 2019, and Lisa and the one other survivor were present at his execution. Lisa later became a sheriff, and also works at a middle school as a resource officer, teaching students how to handle potentially dangerous situations. 

THE KNOWN VICTIMS

Artiss "Ann" Wick, 20 – killed on March 27, 1984

Nguyen Thi Long, 19 – killed on May 13, 1984

Michelle Denise Simms, 22 – killed on May 27, 1984

Linda Nuttall, 33 – assaulted in May 1984; survived

Elizabeth Loudenback, 22 – killed on June 8, 1984

Vicky Marie Elliott, 21 – killed on September 7, 1984

Chanel Devoun Williams, 18 – killed on October 7, 1984

Karen Beth Dinsfriend, 28 – killed on October 14, 1984

Kimberly Kyle Hopps, 22 – killed on October 31, 1984

Lisa McVey, 17 – assaulted, raped on November 3, 1984; survived

Virginia Lee Johnson, 18 – killed on November 6, 1984

Kim Marie Swann, 21 – killed on November 11, 1984

[roseofdarkness0]

Just snippets and random incorrect quotes that been stuck in my head and I had to take them out Sooooooo enjoy? I will have small snippet explain au as a context clue bc I'm not that evil yet.

Edit: Forgot to link it earlier but Poly Ship Au incorrect quotes Au

Married au: Gov and Cali are secretly married and no one knows but them.

~•~

Cali: I want a divorce

Gov: And I want those meetings to not derail into chaos but here we are

Utah: the only one who heard them and questioning his life rn

~•~

Cali: Have you seen our marriage certificate I nee-WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!

Gov: currently setting the certificate on fire GOOD LUCK RETURNING ME WITHOUT A RECEIPT

Cali: YOU SETTING THE LAWN ON FIRE YOU IDIOT

Utah, who just wanted to go out to his car:

Utah: shuffles back inside

~•~

Gov: casually taking four stairs at a time

Cali: falling behind, taking two stairs at a time Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fu-

~•~

after their old rings either get lost or damaged

Cali: I made this wedding band for you.

Gov: You know, I’m not really a jewelry person.

Cali: You don’t have to wear it...

Gov: No, I’m gonna wear it forever. Back off.

~•~

Cali: If you don't stop talking, I'm going to jump out of that window.

Gov: ...We're on the ground floor.

Cali: I know but I want a dramatic exit.

Utah, who just wanted to finish the meeting with gov and go to his wife:

~•~

Cali: Don’t worry, I know exactly what I’m doing. Everything is going to be fine!

Gov: How can you still say that?

Cali: Because sometimes, when things get tough, denial is all we have.

~•~

After Penn and Virginia accidentally find the two making out in gov office

Cali: Are you mad?

Gov: No.

Cali: So sharpening your knives at 3 in the morning is just a hobby?

~•~

Cali: You saved me! Why?

Gov: People would think I murdered you if I didn't.

~•~

Gov: holds a gun out to Cali

Cali: I-I don't believe in guns.

Gov: Well, trust me, they're very real. Now take it.

~•~

Gov: Who hurt you?

Cali: snorting What, do you want a list?

Gov: ...Yes, actually.

~•~

Second a meeting with all the states finishes

Cali: I’m going to hell.

Gov: Probably.

Cali: I'll pick you up?

Gov: nodding Carpool.

States: ????????

Utah: I fReAkinG KnEw IT

~•~

Nevada blinked and watched with increasingly worried expression as Utah muttered to himself, staring at the wall in his office that was covered with scribbled on pages, some photos and a lot of red string.

"Utah??? You good there?"

"Whole week!"

"...w-whole week what?" Nevada flinched as dishevelled and frankly crazy looking Utah turned towards him, pinning him to the spot with just his crazied gaze alone.

"I had to suffer through two of them setting lawns on fire, flirting right in front of me instead of finishing the meetings and Gov mysteriously coming back covered in red substance back to the statehouse in the middle of the night. Heck!!!! WE ALL HEARD THEM FLIRT AN HOUR AGO IN THE MEETING ROOM!" Utah turned back to his conspiracy wall, shaking with what seemed to be explosive cocktail of tiredness and anger "AND YET EVERYONE DISMISSED IT?!"

"W-well to be fair it's hard to imagine-"

"PENNSYLVANIA AND VIRGINIA WERE COMPLAINING ABOUT THEM MAKING OUT JUST FEW DAYS AGO"

"They could have been joking?"

"WHY THE F U C K WOULD THEY JOKE ABOUT THAT?!" Utah look ready to commit murder and Nevada didn't really want to give him ideas on who to murder considering there was only two of them in the room right now.

"Right, you may be right but look at it that way, you are sleep deprived and twitchy enough your wife would replace you wit-" he stopped the joke seeing Utah eyelids twitch violently"-nevermind, point is how about I drive you back to your houses you can relax and nap there instead of being stuck here going a bit cray cray?"

Utah seemed to be considering Nevada offer for a bit before stiffly nodding. Without another word he shoved most of his stuff into his bag and approached Nevada jerkily nodding at him to lead the way.

Cheering oh the inside for the small victory. Nevada confidently strolled out of Utah office just to stop in his track and blink rapidly at

"California? What the fuck are you wearing?"

"Hm? Oh this old thing? I thought the red dress may go well with those shoes and because it's a dinner I matched it with that fancy-"

"Not what I meant-but good pairing, I would have went with different eyeliner but it does work for you-I meant more like why?"

"Oh that's easy, diner with husband"

Nevada didn't need to turn around to be able to know that Utah looks 5 seconds away from either murder or complete break down.

"Uh huh like husband as in friend and their husband or?"

".. I mean like my husband, I haven't spent half my salary on making our rings for nothing you know?"

Nevada blinked as he finally spotted the wedding ring adoring California finger. Before he could question California or himself further there was loud honk coming from outside.

"That must be Gov! I see you two tomorrow!" California winked and went off downstairs, not one to miss the drama Nevada dragged poor Utah after him with one hand whilst in the other he brandished his phone just in time to film Florida do a spit take at Texas face who didn't even acknowledge the scalding coffee as he seemed to have several personal revelations about himself at once.

Louisiana was halfway through drinking to avoid responsibility but choked on his daiquiri when the door opened to reveal handsomely dressed Gov who just looked unimpressed by the chaos happening in front of him. He looked ready to reprimand them but was successfully distracted by California planting a kiss on his cheek which seemed to set of another round of chocked noises, wheezes and rapid slams to the back.

"Cmon we have reservation to get to and I'm not wasting the hours I spend putting the outfit together" Cali tugged on Gov tie to get him back outside.

"If we miss it I will pull few strings-"

"Nope, no string pulling cmon off we go, bye guys!" with a quick wink and a wave California managed to drag Gov outside and towards the car.

"...."

". . ."

Louisiana coughs again, clearing his throat and wincing at the daiquiri he had wasted, patting Florida when he came over and buried his flaming red face into Louisiana shoulder.

Utah just looked very smug and vindicated. Without another word he went to his car to finally get back to his home.

[lilac-hecox]

hello world by the front bottoms absolutely slapped me in the face with how ianthony-coded it is like..

“Well, the sun was made for people who are never gonna touch it

But keep their heads up, anyway”

^ anthony who tried reaching out to ian but felt that he failed every time :(

“My phone calls with a stranger

We have nothing in common

And I have nothing to say”

^ anthony feeling like he didn’t truly know ian anymore and how they stopped talking about things outside of smosh, failed reconnections

“It used to go question and then answer

But we were younger and it was easy

Now it goes question and then question

Question, answers don't come so easy”

^ the way they avoided confrontation more and more to keep things from falling apart and lost their childhood easiness

“But I am a grown up, I should grow up

Find something to occupy my time

Instead of notebooks filled with nonsense

Looking for answers I'll never find”

^ GODDD. it’s just So anthony. his very literal notebook with questions for ian that he never imagined would be answered..

verse 2 feels more like ian’s pov and maybe even an AU angle in there? i don’t know. just love this <3 would love to hear ur favorite songs for them !!

ANON!!! THIS IS MAKING ME GO CRAZY.

Hello World is absolutely Ianthony coded. I also absolutely love The Front Bottoms so you're getting a specifically The Front Bottoms themed post!

You touched on the second verse of Hello World in your ask but the line that absolutely screams Ianthony to me (like you said from Ian's POV) is:

And now you show me new tattoos And my fingers touch your skin You say they all have so much meaning as colored ink is sinkin' in

--

West Virginia

Okay! For starters, I made a post about their song West Virginia and how that is probably the number one Ianthony coded Front Bottoms song for me about their split and the divorce and all the stuff that hurts so badly.

“Is it raining where you are?” The only thing I could think to ask But nothing ever hurt so bad As the “no” that you said back

and

The farther you go from where you start The harder it is to get back

and

And I have learned that the direction I was walking was so wrong And I just need a little help here, man To find the path I should be on

Like, I think this song flips between the two of them but can also paint a picture of Anthony really struggling with leaving, if it was the right thing to do. He's so aware that he and Ian aren't what they were anymore, and he's got all of these feelings and issues inside of him that is going to tear him up if he doesn't get the fuck away, but he also is hurting himself by leaving Ian.

--

Rhode Island

Everything you're feeling is coming Even though you've never felt so alone I could probably catch a ride to your house Borrow a bike to get back home

Again I see this from Anthony where he gets these desperate feelings during the split where all he wants is to see Ian but it feels impossible at the same time.

--

Swimming Pool

There's comfort in the bottom of a swimming pool I'm holding my breath for you There's no doubt in my mind that if you could, then you would try Crack my ribcage open and pull my heart right through

This one is from Ian's POV. He knows Anthony wants him to open up and he knows he can't, and Anthony would push to hurt him to get him to open up.

But I'm a creature of a culture that I create I'm the last one on the dance floor as the chandelier gives way And I am permanently preoccupied with your past I've been around long enough now to know That the good things never last, they never last

This is Anthony's POV. He's stuck in Smosh when owned by Defy and he can't escape his own creation even if it is killing him. He's obsessed with how much better it was before and he is saddened that he and Ian have lost what they had.

I will stop cutting my pants into shorts I will address the issues I cannot ignore And I will do the things I think you might like And I will be alone, probably the rest of my life

I really think this is both of them. Picture it like a movie, the song plays over parts of both of them struggling post split, trying to work separately and move on. This especially speaks to Ian sort of sadly resigning himself to have losing Anthony.

--

Looking Like You Just Woke Up

So I'm swinging like a fist fight, concrete colored basement Alright, alright, let's keep this clean As clean as you like And it probably won't get easier, just easier to hide Prepare for an aching the rest of your life

Ian and Anthony fighting and being passive aggressive towards one another and that deep and painful ache that will reside in both of them once it's all over and they split apart.

--

Twin Sized Mattress

With tears in my eyes, I begged you to stay You said, "Hey man, I love you, but no fucking way!"

ABSOLUTE PAIN. THE MOMENT THAT ANTHONY ASKED IAN TO COME WITH HIM WHEN HE LEFT DEFY ERA AND IAN SAID NO.

--

Jim Bogart

I would sleep better on your floor than I would ever in my bed And if your carpet makes my face itch, it'd still be heaven in my head

Teenage Ianthony! Unrequited sleep over crushes!!!

Sometimes things just don't work out The way you want them to

Self-explanatory of them splitting apart.

--

Flashlight

You are still here, you are still happy You are still smiling and laughing You are still the only thing and everything I need in my life

Nostalgia from one for the other!! Intense longing!!

And it goes in, in, out through the mouth Breathing exercises I will never figure out

The 'inhale' and 'exhale' tattoos

And I can hear your dog whistle from my bedroom Yeah, yeah And I can see a flashlight cutting up the trees behind my house (I can see a flashlight)

Picture teenaged Ianthony and Anthony walking to Ian's place at night, and he can always see the dumb flashlight Anthony carries during the walk. The dog whistle is the intense draw the one has to the other.

And I will read the flashing like a morse code explanation That will mean nothing, but take all night to figure out, out, out

Anthony watching Ian's solo Smosh videos for ideas of where he is mentally.

When I am sad, I am sad But when I am happy, oh, God, I'm happy And there's just no place in between for us to meet (so when I wake up, be like, "Yeah, everything's alright")

MY SAD BABY BOYS.

--

Skeleton

Reunited and it feels so good It's so much better than I thought it would 'Cause I feel fucked, but in a good way

Ianthony reunited!

I got miles to go 'Til I ever get home But the sound of your laugh And your voice on the phone Makes me feel like I am already there

The Prague trip.

--

Cough It Out

All the branches on the tree That we carved our initials in, seem to bend and take the shape of them And, oh, can't you see? I am delusional with love

Again, like a younger love Ianthony being very hopeful for the future and in retrospect almost delusional.

I don't care if you're not sorry, I forgive you And with or without your support, I will continue

Anthony saying "I don't care if you're not sorry, I forgive you."

And Ian feeling like 'with or without his (Anthony's) support, I will continue.

But whatever I did for you last year, I cannot do again It's getting harder and harder, and harder and harder, for me to call you a friend No matter how many times I say I won't, I defend you if I can But whatever I did for you last year, I cannot do again

The cusp of Anthony leaving and knowing that he loves Ian but he can't do it anymore.

[theretirementstory]

Oh the delightful colours of autumn! I think the red leaves are Virginia Creeper.

So this week I feel as if I have been “the white tornado”! I had a lovely walk down to the river, obviously taking photos as I always do. I did miss the opportunity of photographing the train as it made its way from the last stop, Chaumont, to the next stop, Bar-sur-Aube, it’s final destination being Paris. I was too busy trying to take the above photo.

I took delivery of the new printer 😁, amongst all the blurb was a CD for installing onto the computer……. Oh I wanted to cry! However another bag of blurb contained information on how to install online. Well it took about three attempts but somehow (I know not how) it actually worked and I was able to print papers to my hearts content!

A visit to the doctors was on the cards too as I told the nurse about my swollen, red hot ankles and she said the dreaded word “phlebitis”. Typically, my ankles were still a little swollen but had no signs of redness or heat when I arrived at the doctors and he concluded that it could be water retention. So I was given tablets (yes more!) and he hoped that I would expel the water by the usual channel.

We had very, very heavy rain on Tuesday and as I had anticipated (by placing a bucket in the appropriate spot) the water started coming through the dining room ceiling yet again! I decided to ring the man who had been out to view it the year before, but had never let me have the estimate as he was going through a divorce! When he answered, I just gave my name and he said he would be with me “tout de suite”, which to be honest he was. He remembered my address, all about the problem and he asked if I would be in all day as he would bring the estimate later that same day. He kept his word, I was happy with the price (as last year he had been up on the roof investigating the problem) I signed the estimate making it a binding contract and he will come and do the work when we have a dry day. Hallelujah!

I had a phone call from the hospital changing the date of my CT scan from Thursday to Friday. Of course I was in panic mode! Taxi to be cancelled and booked for the next day but everything was fine. So off I went with a very polite taxi driver. Having attained 60+ years without any real marks on my skin ( a caesarean scar but that’s not noticeable) I have now had not one but two tattoos! 😂😂these will also not be visible as they are the tattoos for my radiotherapy. I am under the impression that the treatment will start in two weeks, but who knows I may get a phone call to go in earlier or later!

I decided to clear the wardrobe of all the items which are just too big for me now. There were five pairs of trousers which just hung on me, a skirt which may have wiggled it’s way down 😳, there were t-shirts and tops which I would have worn but would have hung on me again! I took it all to the charity shop. Then I started clearing out other areas, and then filled the car with “stuff”for the decheterie (tip). Holy smoke, I had things I had brought over from England which were still wrapped in bubble wrap, well I have been here over 6 years so I reckon it is safe to say I won’t be needing them. I have a lot of English books which I have read and I am going to meet up with a friend on Tuesday and she is going to take me to a charity shop, in deepest darkest Haute Marne, where she has seen English books. So as you can guess I am sorting out more bits and pieces to take. Plus I am going to check out the garage for more stuff to go to the decheterie.

After clearing the clothes, I was looking for some new jumpers. I saw a couple on the “sale rail” bought them and brought them home to try on, they were a perfect fit. Yesterday, I went out looking for other items and I got the bargain of the day, a skirt with 70% off the original price! I tried it on and it too fitted very well. I have had a productive week.

I have been “knitting Nora” working on the babies blanket. As I would like all the knitting sorted up earlier than the 24 November so that it is all ready for the Christmas Fayre.

Of course my week wouldn’t be complete without messages to French and English friends plus telephone calls to the UK too. I really don’t know how I fit all of these in as phone calls usually run for an hour (or more). As the old BT advert used to say “ it’s good to talk”.

Now it’s time for the records spot! This weeks offerings are “My Cherie Amour” by Stevie Wonder from back in 1969. I remember at school in the playground we used to listen to the charts on a Tuesday, on a little transistor radio. I loved this song and would sing along any time it was played.

The second song is “Question” by The Moody Blues. My first “real” boyfriend liked the band as well as Wishbone Ash, Led Zeppelin and others of their ilk. I got into the Moody Blues after “Nights in White Satin” was in the charts again in 1972 and strangely was seeing the same guy for the second time. He was still into Wishbone Ash etc whereas I was into Slade, T Rex, Bowie (for Mick Ronson) and Mott thé Hoople. 😂😂.

Let’s just give a quick mention to “The Daddy” who has been on “elderly relative duties” again this weekend. It will be the last weekend for a while. “The Trainee Solicitor” has had another busy week too, I hope he managed to take advantage of the extra hour in bed. “The Ex-Graduate” has had a couple of “rest days” this week but that was just to get her ready for a very busy week at work this coming week.

Jusqu’à la semaine prochaine.

[clunelover]

Lol I’ve also been contemplating midlife crises now! I’m glad I did that weaving weekend and learned how physically demanding it is to warp the loom, or else I might have wasted thousands on getting one to start crisis-ing it up with weaving.

I am kind of in a constant state of wanting to Do Something to shake things up and make something happen. I kind of miss those earlier days when more doors were open - like, when I had gotten into a few grad programs and didn’t know if we’d move to Louisiana or Virginia or California. And then looking at jobs post grad school…granted we ended up just moving right back home, but I also interviewed for stuff in other places. And now, we have these kids who have already been moved once for a bigger house, and I don’t want to move them again. I have money, and with more remote work opportunities, I could in theory go anywhere…except for these kids! Idk, why couldn’t I have had money back when I was free to do anything! Lol.

So, I find new hobbies and obsessions, I try to make time for them, all the while feeling harried and like there’s not enough time to do anything that would meaningfully cause something to change.

I don’t quite feel like I lost my identity by having kids, it’s more just like…feeling the full impact of how much it forces you to settle down, and how long that lasts. Chafing at the mandatory settledness even though my life is awesome and I like where we live and I love my husband and kids. I’m bored, but not in a bad way, other than sometimes the idea of being bored scares me- like what if I get so bored I become compelled to do something really drastic like get a divorce (even though I don’t want a divorce!) Okay I’m rambling now so I’ll just stop here.

[addisongallo]

In Character:

Full Name: Addison Gallo

Faceclaim: Monica Barbaro

Pronouns/Gender: she/her

Age & Birthday: 34, January 5th, 1990

Birth Place: Alexandria, Virginia

How long have they been in town?: 2 years

Living Situation: Apartment above Lilac Lane

Occupation: Gallerist at Artful Aura

Family: Mother in Alexandria, father in New Bellevoux, and three older brothers

Biography:

Addison was born in Alexandria, the youngest of four siblings. With three older brothers, Addison was the unexpected girl her father never saw coming. He was a military man, a general and someone important in Washington D.C. With three boys before her, he had been planning the dynasty of Gallo leading military men. And then Addison was born. He wasn't interested in a babbling little girl, so he left her to her mother's care.  She spent her whole life trying to impress her dad, to gain his attention and approval. Instead of always pushing her aside to whatever womanly pursuits he imagined she got up to. So she learned how to fight. She learned to play sports. How to hunt. All of the same things that her brothers learned.  Addison entered the military after school. She went to West Point and started on the process to become a pilot. But after six years when her father finally visited her, after she graduated from West Point, and after well on her way to fly fighter jets it all ended. Addison fought with her father and she learned the hard truth: he would never approve of her. She would never be good enough for him. So, Addison stopped caring. She left the air force that day. She quit the military and anything her father would have expected as a Gallo child. Withdrawing all the money from her trust fund that she had never touched, Addison left and moved to London. She got into college and studied art. When she left she got a job in an art gallery and started selling. Addison even lived in Paris for two years.  All those years wasted trying to mold herself into the person she thought her father would approve of for nothing. Addison was angry, and only in the art world did she find some solace. Though that bitterness and anger still stuck with her.  Two years ago, it all changed again. Her father had been diagnosed with Alzheimer's a year earlier but it had been kept under wraps. However, he was getting worse. He had finally retired from the military but he could no longer stay in D.C. by himself. Her parents had gotten divorced ten years before and her mother had her own new family still in the D.C. area. Her three brothers all had their own military careers. So, she was the only one left. They moved her father back to his hometown of New Bellevoux away from everything in Washington and the high stress that came with his name. Addison had to move to New Bellevoux Louisiana to look after him and be there for him. Ironic that maybe if he wasn't losing his memory he might have finally given his approval for her actions. But it never came. She has been working at Artful Aura for two years now, visiting her father at the home when she can and rages against herself for being the little girl bending to her father's will once more. 

[intriguingpeoplebyangelafloyd]

SANDRA BULLOCK

SANDRA BULLOCK

26 July 1964

            Sandra Bullock is an American actress. She has appeared in: The Vanishing (1993), Wrestling Ernest Hemingway (1993), Speed (1994), The Net (1995), Practical Magic (1998), The Prince of Egypt (1998), Crash (2004), The Lake House (2006), Infamous (2006, Harper Lee), the Prime Ministers: The Pioneers (2013) and Minions (2015).

            Bullock was born in Washington DC, Arlington, Virginia, US. Her mother was from Germany and her father was an Army worker who oversaw the Army’s Postal Service in Europe. He was stationed in Nuremberg when he met her mother, and they married in Germany. She was raised in Nuremberg, Germany and Vienna and Salzburg, Austria and knows how to speak German. As a child she learned ballet and took part in opera productions. Her family moved to the US and during high school she became a cheerleader and theatre actress. After school she worked as a bartender, waitress and coat checkers whilst auditioning for roles.

            Bullock was married to Monster Garage TV host Jesse James, and she has two children. Bullock and James married in 2005, in 2010 several women claimed that he had affairs with him. He denied the rumours at first, but eventually issued a public apology to Bullock. James - a liar, cheater, and isn’t a person that can be trusted. Bullock made the right move by divorcing his ass in 2010. Bullock has also been linked to Matthew McConaughey and Ryan Gosling.

            In 2000, Bullock was in a plane crash on a runway, she and two crew members escaped uninjured. In 2008, she and James were in a car crash and was hit head-on by a drunk driver but the two survived uninjured.

            Bullock has been a victim of stalking and harassment, in 2002 she was hounded by Thomas James Weldon and had to get an AVO against him 2003 and 2006. When he was released from a mental institution he travelled to find her. In 2007, another stalker of Bullocks, Marcia Diana Valentine was found lying outside her and James’s home in Orange County, California. James went to confront her, Valentine ran to her vehicle and attempted to run him over. Another problematic person was Joshua James Corbett who broke into her Los Angels home in 2014, Bullock had to lock herself into a room and contact emergency. He missed his court date and police went to his parents’ home in 2018 to arrest him. He refused to leave and threatened the officers. A SWAT team was called and after a standoff they entered the house and found he had taken his own life.

            To everyone STOP stalking and harassing Sandra Bullock! People need to respect other people’s boundaries. It’s never okay to stalk or harass someone, even if they’re a celebrity.

#sandrabullock #infamous #infamous2006 #nelleharperlee #harperlee

[gryfflepuffinthetardis]

Valentía: Compulsion

Season One Masterlist

Previous: Extreme Aggressor

Next: Won’t Get Fooled

Summary: The BAU is called to an Arizona college after an arsonist kills a student in a fire that's different from most serial arsonists.

Warning: Death by fire; Descriptions of disorders; Likelihood of disorders in firesetting and arsonists; Hints at BPD (Migraines in the heat but I did some Spencer Reid research and people with ADHD are more likely to experience migraines that those without ADHD); Zoe making fun of Rossi; Mentions of Rossi's divorces; Zoe making fun of Gideon's obsession with birds; Reid and Zoe hating salad; OCD; Possible unrealistic OCD; Zoe rebelling; Comparing ADHD to OCD; Possibly incorrect Mexican and Aztec culture

(I am ADHD and at times, I've done things because I felt like I had to, sudden urges, but this is more impulsivity than an actual compulsion and I've learned to resist, to mask my symptoms because then people get upset with me, I acknowledge that and I'm not trying to insult anyone with OCD.)

“I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me.” — Joshua Graham

Late February to Early March, 2005

Dumfries, Virginia

The Footpath killer held a gun at Gideon's head, "The gun." He started to stutter again, "T-T... take out the gun." Gideon obeyed, removing his handgun from his hip, "Th... th... throw it."

"Any particular direction?" Gideon asked and he started to turn to look at him when the Unsub hit Gideon in the back of the legs with his shotgun. Gideon shouted out in pain, falling down and dropping his gun.

The unsub took Gideon back inside and threw him against a wall with Gideon still on his knees and the unsub still aiming his gun at him, breathing heavily.

"Who... who are y-y-y... who are you?" He stammered and Gideon didn't respond at first, "Who are you?!"

"FBI." Gideon responded calmly.

"T-T-T... T-T... take out your W... your w-wallet." The unsub stuttered, still breathing heavily.

Gideon removed his wallet from his back pocket and held it behind his back for the man; he took it, seeing the

GIDEON reaches for his wallet with his left hand, removes it from his pocket and holds it behind his back toward the man. The unsub angrily threw it on the floor and moved to the other side of Gideon so he could see Gideon's face.

"Wh-wh... wh...wh-wh-what...what do you kn-kn... what do you know?" He demanded.

"About you? Or about the people who you've murdered? I know a lot about you. I know how you do it. I know you can't stop. And I know something that no one's ever been able to tell you. I know why you stutter."

———————————————————————————

FBI, Behavioral Analysis Unit

Quantico, Virginia

September 27, 2005

Gideon was talking to three agent trainees, one female and two male.

"Weren't you a little bit worried he might just shoot you??" The female trainee asked.

"I was a lot worried." Gideon confessed.

"But how did you find him?" One of the male trainees asked.

"I was just stopping for gas. I walked into that store, and I saw pieces of a profile that I'd given to Virginia P.D. almost a year ago and I had just been talking to one of the agents out there who was hired soon after about this very profile. Truck in disrepair, a disheveled young man, severe stutter. James Reese once said, 'There are certain clues at a crime scene which, by their very nature, do not lend themselves to being collected or examined. How does one collect love, rage, hatred, fear?' These are things that we're trained to look for."

"So anyone else would have just seen a guy who stutters, but you saw the Footpath Killer." The first trainee realized.

Elle, the newest hire, arrived at the door and listened in.

"Right. But sometimes these guys are still found by just dumb luck." Gideon pointed out. "Berkowitz was caught because of a parking ticket."

"Except the cop who caught him wasn't staring down a shotgun like you were." Elle spoke up.

"This is true." Gideon admitted and he turned to the trainees, "This is also a good time to stop."

Exchanging "thank you"s, the trainees left past Elle who smiled politely as she moved past and entered and she sat down.

"Okay, I'm curious. Why'd he stutter?" She asked.

"You're on your way to becoming part of the behavior analysis team now, Elle. You tell me."

——————————————————————————

At his desk, Spencer removed a black piece from a chessboard and Gideon moved a white piece and said, "Check. Checkmate three moves." Then he walked off.

Spencer looked down at the board, incredulously, "What...?"

"You know you'll beat him when you start learning." Morgan said.

"Learning what?" Spencer asked.

"To think outside the box." Zoe replied, moving her office chair to Spencer's desk.

"I do."

"You and Gideon play chess differently. You memorize every move you can make but Gideon does it a different way. Once you realize that, then you'll be able to beat him. Here. I learned to play when I was a baby." Zoe said, moving the chess pieces off the board to play a game with Spencer.

"A baby?" Morgan asked as Zoe and reset the board.

"By the time I was one I had the cognitive understanding of an eight-year-old." She said, blankly. It wasn't a brag. It was a simple statement.

Spencer was looking at Zoe with a slight smile tugging at his lips.

"By the time I was three, I could beat fully grown men in chess matches."

Spencer loved to learn about Zoe's past. Oh, if he only knew. But he found her past interesting.

"I always play black." She said and Spencer made the first move."

"You know statistics say that white tends to win more often then black at a winning percentage between fifty-two to fifty-six percent." Spencer provided.

Zoe was unlike all the other members of the team with Spencer. They always interrupted him during his rambles and sometimes even fully walked away. Zoe never did. She listened and sometimes even added her own facts.

"Really? Well, we'll see." She said and moved her chess piece as Elle walked down the stairs towards them.

"Question for you." Elle said to Morgan.

"Shoot."

"The Footpath Killer, why did he stutter?"

"Come on, Elle, we've all asked him, and he won't say." Morgan said, as Spencer made his move.

"You guys don't know why the Footpath Killer stuttered?" Zoe asked, sounding genuinely confused that they didn't.

"You do? Tell us." Elle said.

Zoe smirked and simply looked back at the chessboard and made her move.

"She also wants us to figure it out. She's evil." Morgan said and then Zoe laughed at the insult.

"They want us to figure it out." Spencer said, looking at Zoe study the chessboard rather than the chessboard itself.

"Okay. I'm up for a challenge." Elle said.

Jennifer Jareau or as all her friends called her “JJ”, communications liaison who had actually been off when they had met Elle approached, "Good, because these go to you." She dropped a stack of files on Elle's desk. JJ was blonde and skinny with blue eyes, she was third-youngest person on the team being a year older than Spencer. She introduced herself to Elle as Spencer and Zoe continued their chess match until Hotch called them, "BAU team, can you meet me in the conference room, please? I need to show you something."

They entered the conference room with a paused video on the screen, "This is from the Phoenix office. Bradshaw College in Tempe. six fires in seven months."

"Who recorded it?" Gideon asked.

"A student with a digital camcorder. He was watching a fire in the building across from their dorm. The other person you'll see is his roommate, twenty-year-old Matthew Rowland." JJ replied and she used the remote to begin the video, showing a clearly handheld camera filming a window glowing with fire and smoke from a neighboring window.

"This is crazy. Hey, Matt, get over here. You gotta see this. The building's on fire."

A young man between Zoe and Spencer's ages leaned into frame, saying, "Bro, you getting this?"

"Is that the kid?" Gideon asked.

"Yeah, that's him." Hotch said.

"Relax, man. There's always fires during rush week." Matthew was saying.

"Yeah, but that's pretty big." The student behind the camera said. "What building is that?"

But Matthew had seen something and was walking to the dorm room door.

"Dude, over here. Check this out."

"What is it?" His friend asked and Zoe vaguely heard a doorknob sound but didn't think much of it.

"I don't know, but it's coming underneath the door."

"Is someone in the hallway?"

"Hey, someone's trying to get in."

Then a clear liquid splashed under the door and into the room.

"WHOA!" Matthew shouted.

"Hey, man, you should get in there." His friend warned.

"Oh, my god! It smells like gas." Matthew said and then the liquid on the floor was set on fire and so was Matthew.

"Oh, god! God! Oh, my god! Oh, my god!" Matthew started to scream and he dropped the floor. His friend dropped the camera and grabbed a blanket, trying to use it to put Matthew out as he continued to scream. "Aah! Put me out! Oh, my god! Oh, god! Help!"

"Zoe, this is your area of expertise." Gideon said.

"Yeah."

"Your specialty is arson?" Elle asked Zoe.

"I have a lot of specialties." Zoe said, casually and then left.

———————————————————————————

Einstein once said: "Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world."

In the jet, Zoe and Spencer were restarting their chess game.

"There are two common stressors for a serial arsonist." Spencer said.

"Loss of job, loss of love." Elle said.

"Not just that, there are many common stressors that could cause serial arson including childhood trauma, mental illness,

"What disorders?"

"Many different ones. In childhood, firesetting is associated with depression. But in adults, its most usually schizophrenia," Zoe explained and Spencer's hazel-brown eyes darted up and he examined her, "ten percent of convicted arsonists had schizophrenia and the likelihoodthat arson offenders have schizophrenia has been estimated to be more than twenty times greater than that of the general public. But it's not limited to that. Remember schizophrenic people are not as often to be violent as you may think. Only ten to fifteen percent exhibit violent behavior while eighty-five to ninety percent have no violent behavior."

A thankful smile pulled at Spencer's lips and his eyes softened. None of the team knew that his mom had schizophrenia or that he feared he may one day be at risk for it.

"We got another Doctor Reid here." Morgan teased.

"I'm a medical doctor with twenty-four degrees and ADHD and I'm not even twenty yet; I got my medical degree when I was seventeen, do you think I don't know my statistics when it comes to mental health as well as physical health?

Spencer could listen to her talk about statistics all day.

"Substance abuse is also a large factor..."

"According to a study of two-hundred-and eighty-three arsonists, sixty-four percent were abusing alcohol or drugs at the time of their firesetting." Spencer said.

"Exactly right. But other disorders that could be linked to firesetting include conduct disorders, antisocial personality disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder also known as OCD, psychotic disorder, and schizoid disorder. But other non-disorder-related factors may motivate arsonists to commit arson such as delusions which are a symptom of a disorder but not the disorder all together, revenge, desire for attention, stress and/or conflict at home such as violence or abuse or poverty or anger. Those are just a few." Zoe explained.

Hotch observed her, Zoe was remarkably good with disorders which wasn't surprised since she herself had a few and she has described her Valdez family as being law enforcement, criminals, or mentally ill and her father was Bipolar.

"When was the first fire set?" Morgan asked.

"March. Uh, the next one was in May," Hotch flipped the paper in his file to read on, "and the third one wasn't 'til September. Then two weeks later there were three in one night."

"He's speeding up. Fires are closer together." Gideon asked.

"Hey, Reid, you got a statistic on arsonists?" Morgan asked.

"Eighty-two percent are white males between seventeen and twenty-seven. Female arsonists are far less likely, their motive typically being revenge."

"Sounds like our boy's a student." Morgan suggested.

"Don't be so sure." Gideon advised. "You rely too much on precedent, you never allow for the unexpected." He had told Zoe this a lot in her childhood, not that he had needed to much. She had always prepared for the unexpected. "If he went from setting one fire to three in two weeks' time..."

"Rapid escalation." Zoe said.

"He's gone from the power to damage a building to something far more satisfying." Gideon said, he had everyone's attention, "The power over life and death." That was a bit dramatic but arsonists weren't exactly known for subtlety. "Who we talking to first?"

"Dean of Students, Ellen Turner." Hotch said.

———————————————————————————

Bradshaw, College

Tempe, Arizona

They got out of the van with Gideon taking the lead rather than Hotch for some reason... old habits die hard, Zoe guessed. He was still adjusting, she predicted that if David Rossi were to come out of retirement which both she and Alexander deemed extremely likely, he would have a little trouble adjusting to how the BAU has changed.

"No badges. I don't want to satisfy the UnSub's need for attention by letting him know he got the FBI here. Try not to look official."

"Yeah, because people dressed this formally often walk with this posture and these black sunglasses that detectives and FBI agents have. Spencer and I kind of look like students." Zoe quipped, sarcastically.

Zoe was determined to disobey the dress code when she could to Hotch's annoyance and disapproval but knew disciplining her would only make her rebel against the dress code even more so. She was also the most unpredictable member while simultaneously being one of the less threatening ones, so her wardrobe further made people underestimate her. She wore leather jackets, flannel, graphic tees, jeans, boots, with dyed streaks in her hair.

"Try to look less official." Gideon corrected, having had helped Alexander raise Zoe (along with Rossi) and considered her as a daughter and was more than used to her relentless sarcasm. 

It ran in both the Noble and Valdez family.

———————————————————————————

They walked across the campus with Dean Turner and a fire officer.

"Obviously, I'd rather be meeting you under different circumstances." She said and then introduced the fire officer to them, "This is Fire Inspector Zhang."

"This morning the chemistry department reported several bottles of highly flammable chemicals missing." Zhang said.

"I'm prepared to evacuate this campus." Turner said.

Hotch and Gideon opened double doors for the rest of the team to walk through.

"Thank you." Turn said.

"Evacuation brings with it its own problems." Zoe explained, popping up beside Turner with her being the shortest of the team.

"You might evacuate the arsonist as well." Gideon agreed.

"Then the case goes unsolved, the campus is reopened, but the fires start up again." Zoe continued.

"Hotch, Gideon, hold on a second." Morgan said and they stopped walking to see what he had to say.

"You said the chemicals were missing today." Morgan asked for clarification.

"Uh-huh."

"It says here that one of the previous fires was set with diesel fuel that disappeared from the grounds keeping facility. How long after it disappeared was the fire set?"

"One day." Turner said.

Hotch and Gideon moved to the side to talk privately.

———————————————————————————

Zoe ducked under the police tape into Matthew's room while Spencer moved it out of the way, followed by Hotch.

"Door was locked." Hotch said, looking at the doorknob.

"Matthew Rowland and his roommate watched as the doorknob turned against the lock." Spencer recalled.

"But the unsub couldn't get in." Zoe added.

"So he pours the accelerant into the room from the hallway." Spencer said.

"Which means he couldn't see the fire." Hotch pointed out.

"But he could hear Matthew Rowland screaming." Spencer said.

"Yeah, but not for long. He would have left quickly."

"Yeah, to avoid being spotted." Spencer agreed.

"It doesn't make sense." Hotch stated, entering the room.

"Pyromania as a mental disorder may just be a simple myth, but we do know from precedent that serial arsonists derive pleasure from pathological fire-setting." Spencer said.

"Sex and power."

"But a serial arsonist wouldn't just set a fire and walk away." Spencer frowned.

"He needs to experience it." Hotch agreed.

"So why would he set a fire he couldn't watch?" Spencer asked.

"Depends on the motive." Zoe said.

———————————————————————————

In Turner's office, Zhang showed them something in a box, Zoe recognized them as burned up ignition devices.

"He turned the water off just before the fire. The last three were set with these. Two devices, simultaneous ignition."

"There was no device used on Matthew Rowland. Unsub set that one manually?" Gideon asked.

"He wanted to be there to enjoy the kid's death." Morgan suggested.

"Not necessarily."

"The arson would've had to leave too soon to enjoy Matthew's death." Zoe pointed out. "Or else they would've been spotted."

From what she seen, the unsub was intelligent, they clearly intended for fires to be set.

"Well, if the target was Matthew Rowland, then why set the other two fires?" Elle asked.

"The motives for arson are relatively simple. There's vandalism, crime concealment, political statement... Profit..."

"And revenge." Hotch said.

"Mmm." Zoe hummed, absent-mindedly. That was only for neurotypical arsonists.

"We interviewed Matthew Rowland's roommate. He said Matthew was very well-liked." Zhang said, "No reason for revenge."

"What about vandalism?" Turner asked.

"No. The fires are too sophisticated, and if he's trying to make a political statement, he's not being too clear about it." Elle explained.

"There's an underlying strategy in this case. Matthew, firefighters, injured victims. To the unsub, they're not people. They're..." Gideon said.

"They're objects." Hotch finished.

"More like, uh..." Gideon said as he examined one of the devices.

"Chess pieces." Spencer piped up.

"Exactly." Gideon said and tossed the device back into the box.

———————————————————————————

They were still in Turner's office, Elle was drinking coffee while Zoe had a Mexican Hot Chocolate that was highly caffeinated.

"The timer sets the road flare, which then lights the chemical mixture inside the canister." Zoe explained to Spencer and Elle and then she shrugged, "Simple."

"Yet sophisticated in its simplicity. I mean, there's a meticulous construction to it." Spencer added.

Elle looked between the two prodigies.

"See why we got to join the FBI younger than people usually do?" Zoe asked, she wasn't bragging, she was just stating a fact. 

She had been impressing people with her intelligence since she was a baby. Hitting milestones before other babies, even progressing just ahead Zarah. She was a problem solver since forever despite her inability to focus. She wasn't sure if he was telling her the truth but according to Alexander, she solved a case of his when she was three. She always tended to enjoy and prefer solitude and since she could talk in full sentences (at age one; granted not in grammatically correct sentences but sentences nonetheless) she had been prone to continually questioning things, and she was incredibly alert for a baby (which Alexander sometimes wondered if it was trauma from the kidnapping), all of which Alexander insisted meant she would be a genius and he was right.

"Chemical accelerant could mean chemistry student." Elle theorized, standing up to walk around.

"It could also mean chemistry professor." Spencer suggested

"Mmm. I say student." Zoe agreed with Elle, "You need self-confidence to lecture in front of a classroom full of thirty college kids."

Spencer nodded and started to study one of the electronic devices. Zoe sat next to him and Spencer gulped as she examined the device too.

"Yeah, arsonists are socially incompetent. This guy doesn’t go on dates, doesn’t go to parties, doesn’t feel comfortable in front of groups." Elle said when she noticed both Zoe and Reid staring at her as she had just profiled the both of them and there was an awkward silence as Elle realized this. “And of course he’s a total psychopath.”

Of course.” Spencer said.

"Still fits me." Zoe said. And half of my family. Maze, espeically. "But you know..." She trailed off deliberately and didn't elaborate any further.

Elle looked at Spencer who waved his hand like, 'don't bother asking. She'll just confuse and/or horrify you even more'.

Zoe’s tendency for violence was far from secret, her own fashion sense of cool and/or dark colors and leather jackets, dyed hair, and resting face gave off a message of do not fuck with me or I will rip your whole life to shreds,

Zoe was subconscious thumbing at silver moon necklace around her neck. Zoe had a few necklaces and Spencer had noticed that a lot of them were of the moon.

This made total sense for him as Zoe was not only half-Mexican but from Aztec descent. A case a few months in, an UnSub from very distant Native Amercia tribe ansestory using Native American traditions, she had shocked everyone by translating genuine Nahuatl, the lanauge of the Aztecs, before explaining that she was from Aztec descent. According to Morgan, Spencer had had a face that said "marry me." It was one of the few languages she could fluently read and write as well as speak along with Spanish and English.

In Aztec culture, the moon was the representation of a goddess named Mētztli known for her darkness and fear of the sun and fire, her morality wasn't explicitly stated as the masculine side of the moon, Tecciztécatl who was considered to be evil. In Mexican culture, the moon has many meaning that Spencer thinks apply to Zoe as well. Calmness, beauty, nurturing, cooling, instinct, reflection, mystery, emotion, and the world of the dead, which Zoe had a deep belief in, she had calavera tattoos, a tattoo of Santa Muerte, and a wolf alebrije.

Of course, this was some info Spencer had mentally gathered but hadn’t said aloud.

Zoe was looking intensely in a random direction. "Fire."

“Do you hear that?” She asked.

“Hear what?”

Zoe suddenly got up and opened the window, bringing in the sounds of screams from nearby people.

"Another fire." She said and took off running.

Zoe had been running all her life, she was trained by her cousin since she was like six years old, she had higher stamina than the average person, it was how she managed to finish her FBI training early, she knew how to push her body to the limit and keep on going.

She arrived to the building that people were running out of and staring in horror at and as always she differed from the crowd by running inside. She heard a voice screaming came upon Gideon smashing an office door window with a fire extinguisher. The sign next to the door said: 3 — Professor Ralph Wallace.

Professor Ralph Wallace had stopped screaming by now.

“Gideon, I think he’s dead!” She shouted.

Suddenly she heard running descending footsteps. “Someone’s running!” She shouted and ran off.

“Zoe!” Gideon shouted after her.

Zoe didn’t catch them, she had come across a student just younger than who had fallen down due to an asthma attack from a combination of stress and smoke inhalation. Based on the name written in Sharpie on his name was Scott. He was half-conscious but the symptoms were so bad he couldn’t manage on his own.

“Hey, don’t worry. I’m going to get you out of here.” She reassured him.

Morgan had pulled Gideon out and he was fighting against him.

“Get off of me!” Gideon bellowed. “There was a teacher!”

“Let it go! He’s already dead!” Morgan shouted back. “Let it go.”

Spencer and Alexander came upon them.

“Hey, where’s Zoe?” Spencer asked.

“She’s still inside!” Gideon said. “She thought she heard someone running.”

A look of pure terror came upon Alexander’s face for a few moments before his daughter’s voice called, “Help! Help me with him! He has asthma.”

She was struggling with a door as she was supporting a boy who was half-collapsed and wheezing.

Morgan and Alexander ran over and helped Zoe pick him up and she was able to get through the door much easier.

“Put him on the ground.” She ordered once they were away from the building. “The combination of stress and fire inhalation must’ve triggered an asthma attack.” She pulled the boy’s bag off of him and half-shoved but just about threw it in Morgan’s chest, “Find the inhaler! Scott?” She snapped her fingers and placed a hand on his shoulder. He didn’t respond and his chest wasn’t moving. “He’s stopped breathing.” She turned to Morgan. FIND THE INHALER!”

She checked for a pulse, it was weak but it was there. She placed one hand over the other in the middle of Scott’s chest and pressed firmly. She’s known how to do CPR since she was a child but she still went over it in her head. Two compressions per second using the heel of the palm. Fifteen seconds past and she pinched his nose and blew into his mouth. Again. Again. Scott’s chest stuttered with a breath, he wheezed quietly, still in need of his inhaler.

Finally, Morgan found the inhaler. Zoe took it and shook it for a good few seconds and tilted back Scott’s head and she inserted the inhaler into Scott’s mouth, “breath in.” She said and she pressed down on the top of the inhaler. “Hold your breath, Scott.” She pulled the inhaler out. Scott held his breathe for a few second, allowing the medicine to reach his lungs and then breathed out.

Scott’s breathing became more normal and he struggled to sit up.

“Do you need another puff?” She asked, gently.

He nodded and took the inhaler, soon after the medics took him, stating Zoe had saved his life.

———————————————————————————

Later that day, a boy ran after Zoe, calling, "Excuse me!?"

Zoe turned to see a boy around her age with brown hair in a graphic t-shirt.

"Hey, you're-you're with the FBI, right?"

"Yes, um..."

"My name's Jeremy. I'm one of the research assistants at the science department."

Zoe politely smiled, "Hi, Doctor Zoe Valdez."

"We were talking, and, uh, we'd like to help."

"We're telling the students that the best thing you can do right now is just stay—"

"We know how he did it." He cut her off.

———————————————————————————

Zoe had joined the team after they determined that they didn't have enough to make a profile and she informed them of her conversation with Jeremy and later they went to the chemistry lab where Jeremy and three female students were working.

Hotch approached Spencer and Zoe, "Reid, Valdez," Hotch said to the college-aged agents/doctors, "since you're more their age. Why don't you do the talking."

"No." Zoe said, blankly, shaking her head.

Spencer nervously cleared his throat and proved Elle's profile of him to be quite true as he spoke.

"Ahem. Hi—hi, guys. Uh, my name's, S—uh, Doctor Spencer Reid. I'm a, uh, agent with the—the B.A.U., the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the F.B.I., which, um, it used to be called the B.S.U., the Behavioral Science Unit, but not anymore. They changed it to the B.A.U. Um, it's part of the N.C.A.V.C., the National Center for the Analysis of Violent Crime which is also part of this thing called the C.I.R.G., the Critical Incident Response Group, and—"

This was painful. Oh, the poor boy. The poor socially awkward adorkable boy.

"What he's trying to say is we'd love to know how you can help us." Zoe cut in, holding a lightbulb.

 Jeremy stood up and stepped to Zoe, "May I please?" She handed him the lightbulb. "Thank you. See this?" He put his pointer finger to the bulb, "Drill a hole in the side, fill it with gasoline or whatever's good and flammable. Turn the light on. Boom. That is what went down, didn't it?"

"This stuff's all over the net." Said a female student with blondish-brown hair. "Wanna know how to make a Molotov cocktail that sets itself on fire?"

"Right, um, potassium, sulfur, and normal sugar." Zoe recalled as the girl counted each ingredient on her fingers. 

"Sugar—Sugar—Sugar, which is..." She said, chuckling in disbelief as Zoe tilted her head slightly at her. She had deduced a deep anxiousness in her chuckle but it could just be social awkwardness.

"Not exactly plutonium." Jeremy finished.

"Yeah, you can get this stuff anywhere." Zoe said.

"Sugar from the supermarket." The girl exclaimed.

"How do you know all that?" Spencer asked Zoe.

"That's irrelevant." Zoe dismissed, turning and making brief eye contact with Alexander with a side look.

"But you don't need to be a chem major to know that." Hotch said.

"Do you think it's a chem student?"

"Doesn't have to be a chem student, when I was a kid there was always that weird girl who mixed together chemicals so they exploded." Zoe explained.

Alexander rolled his eyes. That "weird girl" had been Zoe.

"You wanna know what I think?" Jeremy asked, "I... think..." He pressed the lightbulb to his forehead, "it would be a good time to take the semester off." 

———————————————————————————

In the elevator, the button wasn't working.

"Hold on." Jeremy said, taking out a key and inserting it into the elevator control panel. "You need a key to get it movin' after 10:00 P.M."

"So what are you still doin' here?" Zoe asked.

"I can't leave. We've all got projects."

“I came in to work on other projects. You know how to solve the three-body problem?" Jeremy asked and behind Jeremy's back, Spencer nodded in affirmation. "Computing the mutual gravitational interaction between the earth, sun and moon?"

"Yes. I do." Zoe said and Jeremy frowned at her in confusion,

———————————————————————————

Garcia had found a recording of a call, "Karen. I do this for Karen." It seemed like "Karen" was pronounced as "Kar-on".

"Play it again." Gideon requested

"The call came from the office right next to Wallace's 5 minutes before the fire was started." Morgan said.

"Play it again." Gideon repeated.

"Karen. I do this for Karen."

"Again, louder." He requested.

Morgan turned up the speaker and then faced it towards Gideon and replayed it.

"Karen. I do this for Karen."

Zoe was leaning towards it, squinting at it.

"What is it?" Hotch asked.

"I'm not sure. Somethin' about it." Gideon said.

"Are you sure they're saying 'Karen'? The pronunciation sounds a bit off." Zoe said.

———————————————————————————

Later that day, Gideon, Spencer, and Zoe were outside.

Zoe was wearing sunglasses and she groaned.

"What's wrong?"

"I get migraines in the heat." She said, massaging the side of her head.

"Well, maybe you should do something about that." Gideon said, somewhat passive-aggressively. Zoe was refusing to do it. Rossi's first ex-wife (of many) had suggested something, but Zoe was refusing to acknowledge it.

Spencer didn't pick up on it. Students were all around them and Spencer asked, "What if the unsub is one of the students leaving?"

"No, he's not done yet. He's not goin' anywhere. Keep thinkin'."

"Yeah, we'll try that. We definitely haven't been doing that." Zoe deadpanned.

"You mean, out-outside the box?  That's what Morgan and Zoe are always telling me. Zoe says that's why I can never beat you at chess."

"Well, she's probably right. It was smart of whoever approved of her interview to Hotch." Gideon said. It was him.

"But, I mean, in this situation, what exactly is the box?" Spencer asked.

"The standard profile of a serial arsonist. If everything you know goes in the box, what's left?"

"What you don't know. The unknown." Spencer said.

"What's left is everything else. Possibilities you haven't considered yet. Possibilities that need extrapolating, determination... no matter how unlikely. Statistics can only get you so far. They only tell you the likelihood of things, not what will be." Zoe said.

"Exactly." Gideon agreed. "Sometimes you have to get creative. Even if you think it's utterly unlikely, you have to think of things nobody else thought of."

"Like a stutter."

"Yeah, exactly."

Spencer turned to Zoe. "Hey, where'd you learn chess?"

"I have two honorary uncles who helped raised me. More like fathers, really. They certainly tried to boss me around like one. One is very grumpy, very Italian, very snarky, very, very divorced. Like a million times divorced, rich, kind of arrogant who doesn't know how to retire in the slightest as much as he knows how to keep a marriage from not being divorced and likes to shoot birds and thinks he is the best cook on the planet. He used to do the crossword with me until I got better at it than him by the time I was three... in pen... which infuriated him."

Gideon chuckled. She always did this, she went into deep lengths to describe Rossi and even him while not mentioning them directly, like an inside joke. Even though she had yet mentioned chess or even gotten to Gideon yet, Spencer hung onto Zoe's every word. She rarely talked about her past and everything about her seemed to fascinate him. She was by far the co-worker who interested him the most.

Spencer frowned, "Is there any other way to do crosswords than not in pen?"

Zoe let out a breathy laugh before starting on Gideon, "And the other honorary uncle is very patient, gentle, undoubtably the most stable father figure I ever had," She got that right—Rossi had gotten impatient and bored with reading Zoe bedtime stories so he started talking about his active cases which terrified Zarah and fascinated Zoe and Alexander gave into Zoe's pleas; Gideon had always refused. "Calm, pays an infuriating amount of attention, can't cook" Gideon was actually a good cook when he wasn't distracted by cases and children who were way too smart for their own good constantly berating him with questions, "—took me a while to figure out how to get away with stuff around him" Gideon looked at her like, excuse me? "Curious, also quite sarcastic who has an inordinate interest in an animal so boring as birds." Gideon rolled his eyes. "He taught me how to play chess."

———————————————————————————

"Okay, gorgeous, I've put this thing through every audio filter I've got. There's only one thing I can tell you for sure. This guy isn't saying 'Karen'. It's more like 'Ka-rone'." Garcia told Morgan.

"Garcia, what the hell is Ka-rone?"

"If I figure it out, does it earn me a night of passionate lovemaking?"

"Most definitely, sweetness... with Reid.”

Spencer looked at him in confusion.

"Bye." And he hung up.

"Hey, Chicago, you learn anything or you too busy prostituting Reid?" Zoe called to him.

"Hey, Reid.. Garcia says it's not 'Karen'. It's actually somethin' more like—"

Gideon then rushed facing Spencer and Zoe, out of breathe, "Charown!"

"Charown?" Spencer questioned.

"Are you having a stroke right now?" Zoe asked.

"Charown. ‘I do it because of Charown’." Gideon said.

"That's Hebrew." Spencer said.

"It's God's word in anger."

"Yeah."

Elle entered carrying food in plastic containers as she asked, "The motive is now religious?"

"Well, you know, in a lot of religions, god is related to fire." Spencer said as Gideon erased the whiteboard to write on it.

"Well, Brahman is fire in Hinduism, and the Jewish see God as a pillar of fire, and Christians worship God as a consuming fire." Zoe said.

"Okay, so we're lookin' for a theology major." Morgan suggested as Elle tossed Spencer a container of salad and he stared it for a moment. "Maybe he's punishing the other students for their sins."

"I don't want this." Spencer stated, referring to the salad, and handed it to Zoe.

"What? Salad? Gross." She said and set it down.

"What—what's the most sinful place on campus?

"Come on, Elle. When I was in college, that was everywhere." Morgan said.

"Gross. You are aware you were just flirting with Garcia two minutes ago?" Zoe deadpanned, "I don't think that's changed, in your mind at least."

"A fraternity?" Hotch suggested.

"A campus bar?" Elle suggested.

"No, 'cause that's not consistent with the previous targets." Zoe pointed out.

"What about the idea of baptism by fire? Aren't we all supposed to be tested through fire in Revelations?" Morgan asked.

Gideon stopped writing on the board, "Look, it's good, it's good, but let's please do not jump to conclusions. Religion might be a part of it, but it's not necessarily the prime compulsion.”

"Gideon, rush to conclusions, jump to conclusions. Who cares?" Morgan shouted.

“We are running out of time." Elle argued.

Zoe looked down at her spinner ring covered in the evil eye. ADHD didn't usually involve compulsions or obsessions—well, Zoe called them "hyper fixations" but to those without ADHD, it could seem like compulsions because they may also develop repetitive self-soothing behaviors called "stimming" when help those with ADHD focused when they're bored, stressed, or excited.

"Compulsion." She repeated and she recalled how on the plane she had listed a bunch of disorders that were associated with firesetting, and she recalled a repetitive tapping sound.

Compulsions. That narrowed the list of possible disorders down.

———————————————————————————

Spencer and Zoe rewatched the video of Matthew Rowland that night.

Zoe was spinning in her chair, groaning as Spencer shifted in his. He played it again. Then Spencer got up and went to the board Gideon had written on earlier, uncapping the blue marker.

"Outside the box." He muttered and he erased the board.

Then Gideon poked his head in, "Keep thinkin'. It's like chess. Don't look at just the next move. Try to look three moves ahead." Then he left. His usual goodbye.

Zoe was biting her lip, tapping her foot when she suddenly stopped.

She moved to the laptop, replaying the video and she stopped and replayed the part where Matthew heads over the door and the door handle turned. Again. And again.

"Spence..."

Spencer moved to her, leaning down, looking over her shoulder, inadvertently breathing in Zoe's scent—eucalyptus and vanilla with a hint of spice—which nearly made him feel light-headed and he had to remind himself to stop being creepy. She rewinded it to when Matthew was heading over to the door again and paused it. She tapped a few keyboards and zoomed in on the doorknob and pushed play.

The locked doorknob turned thrice.

"Three times." Spencer said.

"Alright, so the disorders I had listed before, not all of them have compulsions. Schizophrenics have frequently been observed to possess obsessive-compulsive symptoms..."

"Thirty percent." Spencer nodded.

"Right, antisocial personality disorder and psychotic disorder have specific compulsions but not all that related to this case."

"Which leads one obvious suspect." Spencer finished. "What room was Professor Wallace in again?" And he went to go look.

"Wait, wait, Spence, I can just hack into the blueprints.

"You can do that?" Spencer asked, coming back.

"I don't want to brag but…" She had been typing and brought up the blueprints and the assigned professors to what rooms. Professor Ralph Wallance — Room 3.

"Why Matthew Roland though?" She muttered.

"Can you bring up Matthew Roland's schedule?" He asked.

Zoe did so and Spencer with his quick reading skills quickly found, "Professor Wallace, Wednesday, three o'clock."

———————————————————————————

Spencer and Zoe went to Alexander, Gideon, and Hotch who were looking at files.

"We know why the profiles never fit. You were right to tell Morgan not to rely on precedent. And Zoe was right, statistics don't tell what will be. The fires thus far have been completely task oriented." Spencer explained

"So once they're set, the unsub is done?" Hotch asked.

"Exactly. The unsub is not a classical serial arsonist. He's someone who uses fire because of a completely different disorder. Zoe was right." Spencer said.

"Which is?"

"An extreme manifestation of OCD, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. They do everything in threes," Zoe explained

"And if we're right, he'll have to kill again." Spencer said.

Zoe was taking out the laptop and bringing up the Matthew Roland video as she said, "Scrupulosity is a subtype of OCD involving religious obsession, compulsions, and moral obsessions. These individuals are overly concerned and sometimes even have an obsessive fear of creating a sin which creates so much anxiety that they are compelled to do something to ease that anxiety."

"Like setting fires." Alexander said.

"Where's the behavioral evidence?" Gideon asked, rubbing his eyes.

"Right here." Spencer reached for the keyboard but he pulled back and turned the laptop to Zoe. She started tapping the keyboard to bring up the zoomed-in footage of the doorknob as Spencer continued to speak, "All right. Remember the night of the three fires? We saw the doorknob turning against the lock." Zoe played the doorknob turning three times. "But he's not trying to get in. He's compelled to turn the doorknob three times."

"Well, what about the fires? The first ones were single fires. If the unsub was OCD, shouldn't they have all been in threes?" Gideon asked.

"They were in threes. A trinity of threes. The first fire occurred on March third.” Spencer explained.

"3:00 P.M. Third day, third month." Gideon said.

"It's that convergence of threes that causes the overwhelming anxiety. Obsessive compulsives ease the anxiety by performing the compulsion." Zoe explained.

"What about the other fires? Professor Wallace?

"Office number three. Zoe checked what room he was in and his schedule. His class was on Wednesdays." Spencer said.

"Third day of the week."

"Matthew Rowland was in that class. It was his third class of the day. If we looked into each of the fires we'd find a lot of patterns having to do with threes because our minds are incredibly adept at seeking out patterns. But to the unsub, once that pattern hits—" Spencer snapped his fingers, "Bam—he sets a fire.

"But if the target was always people, why did no one die in the first few fires?" Gideon asked.

"They were failures. Up until Matthew Rowland." Spencer said.

"I think I know who the unsub is." Zoe said. "And it's not a he but a she. That chemistry student, the blonde one."

They called Turner and had her find the records for the student.

"Clara Hayes. A chemistry student. I'll get you her records now.

"First get campus security out and find her. She could set her next fire within hours." Gideon said into the phone.

"Zoe, how do you know she's the Unsub?" Spencer asked.

"When we were talking to her and her classmates, I noticed something—a ring on her finger. And she kept turning it at intervals of three. And when I listed the ingredients of a light bulb bomb, she counted them and she repeated the word 'sugar' three times. Once she started, she couldn't stop."

"Yeah, it's palilia. It's the involuntary repetition of words. Howard Hughes had it when his OCD worsened." Spencer said.

"Clara and her classmates were working on a project about gravitational pull." Hotch said.

"The three body problem." Gideon recalled.

Morgan called asking about something they found on Clara's wall which was apparently covered in religious writing including Charon, the ferryman who crossed the souls of the recently deceased across the Rivers Styx and Acheron in Greek Mythology.

"Moloch was the demon sun god of the Canaanites. In order to keep from incurring his wrath, the people would sacrifice their children to him by burning them alive."

Alexander took a freshly printed page from the printer and read it, "'sixteen-year-old survives inferno. The mother Ellen Hayes called it a miracle. 'My daughter was tested by God. He tested my child and she came through blessed'.' Look at the house number." It was marked 333.

Hotch continued on the phone with Morgan as they tried to determine where Clara would be.

"Security's checking the science building." Turner said.

"Well, where else would she be?" Alexander questioned.

"We need to find the next pattern of threes." Spencer said.

Morgan had hung up on Hotch and then called him back to say something and then Hotch responded with, "Morgan, seal the building get everybody out of there and walk away."

"We need to send our people into every building and have them start pulling fire alarms. Please, go." Gideon said, snapping his fingers to emphasize his haste and the security guards exited the room to obey. "Mead, a map of the campus. We need to find anything and everything having to do with the number three. Where's the blueprint?"

Zoe and Gideon were on their way out.

"Jason, Zoe, wait, wait, wait, wait." Hotch stopped the two who he knew would risk their life just to reason with a psychotic. "Clara Hayes is very likely a good person; someone who never wanted to do anyone any harm. Like any other rational person. But there's nothing rational about obsessive-compulsive disorder."

Spencer had come up behind Gideon and Zoe, "Research suggests OCD involves problems in communication between the frontal part of the brain and the orbital cortex. Plus deeper structures. The basal ganglia."

"Yes, I know, Spencer." Zoe gritted out but she wasn't bad at him.

"You can't reason with her because you can't reason with a physiological problem.

“OCD’s not physiological! It’s neurodivergent and psychological. There’s even evidence that OCD is a biological disorder!” Zoe snapped, furiously.

Hotch continued to speak as if she hadn’t spoken, “She's not setting these fires because she wants to but because she has to." Hotch said as Zoe's eyes hardened with ice-cold rage as she dealt with physiological symptoms due to her ADHD and ADHD was often associated with OCD, her childhood was filled with near uncontrollable urges that had her convinced she had to act upon her impulses, even more so when she was fifteen and escaped.

"What are you trying to say?" Gideon asked, becoming appalled and hoping Hotch had a different meaning to his words. He was appalled Hotch would say this in front of Zoe who right from the start of her life had to deal with defects and disorders like the UnSubs they hunted but she still managed not to break. Gideon was one of those who didn’t believe it was only CPTSD that Zoe had developed from the trauma of those eight months but it was difficult to see it because it was high-functioning.

"Don't try to convince her to stop because you won't be able to."

"What if your unborn son ends up having her type of OCD?" Zoe asked and she saw a flicker of emotion in Hotch's eyes which meant he was taken aback by her words, "What if he couldn't control it so he was shot in his head? Jack, that's what you're going to name him right.”

"That's not fair.” Hotch muttered.

"Is that the kind of father you're going to be? The hypocrite who claims that psychotics are people too but kills ones he deems to be out of control!? Are you going to be the kind of father your dad was."

Hotch's eyes snapped to hers as she noted his worst fear again.

"I know what it's like to be afraid of your own mind. I do things I have a hard time controlling and people yell at me about them all the time and because of that I had to force myself to curb my impulses and while it may not seem like it but I do have some control and so does she. She just needs to realize that nothing bad is going to happen if she doesn't do this."

“OCD’s not the same as ADHD.”

“True but OCD is highly comorbid with ADHD. Anxiety, deficits in executive functioning, emotional dysregulation, hyper focus, difficult regulating one’s attention, cognitive rigidy, and impulsivity, to name a few.”

“You don’t understand the compulsions, Zoe.”

“I understand them better than you think, Hotch.” She growled and ran off.

“Zoe, you can’t reason with her compulsions!” Hotch shouted.

“Watch me!” She shouted back.

“Gideon.” Hotch turned to Gideon.

“I think this is an area where Zoe knows more than we ever could.” Gideon said.

Zoe remembered what Jeremy had said about the elevator, the key and she knew the third floor was under construction.

———————————————————————————

Hotch had had the same idea as Zoe. Zoe appeared on one side of Clara and Hotch on the other.

"Clara." Hotch said.

"Don't." Zoe pleaded.

Clara looked between the two agents.

"I have to do this." She said, softly.

"You know this isn't rational." Zoe reasoned, slowly approached her.

"You were trying to tell me." Hotch said.

"God chose me to be tested and now he's testing them."

"Yeah but God can't bend the rules of logic and science. You dumped gasoline on them. One spark and they will die." Zoe pleaded. “‘Thou shall not kill’. God’s against killing."

"If I don't do this something terrible will happen." Clara believed.

"What's going to happen, Clara? A flood? An earthquake?" Hotch asked, "You know this isn't rational."

"I know. I know. I know." She said in thrice.

"Then resist." Zoe said.

"I can't!" She cried.

“Yes, you can. I know it feels like you can’t but you can.” Zoe pleaded.

"Clara? Clara? Listen to me." Jeremy pleaded.

"Oh my God!" One of the unnamed girls said. "Clara, don't!"

"They must be tested!" She cried, "God's wrath..."

"Clara, you told us it was a chemistry student. You left the message about Charown. You want to stop. You know this is wrong." Zoe pleaded as Hotch took out his gun.

"Charown. Charon. Moloch. Father, son..." Clara chanted, rocking.

"Clara!" Zoe shouted, kneeling beside Clara and grabbing her wrists loosely to show that she wasn't going to take the flare from her or hurt her. She was just trying to convince her to stop and Clara knew this, she looked at Zoe with big pleading brown eyes. "I know what it's like. The impulses. They've always been there. Making you different. You feel if you resist then something bad will happen. But that's just the anxiety!"

"No! It's not."

"Shut up!" Zoe shouted when the students started screaming their protests again with a sharp look at them like, shut up and let me handle this. She looked back at Clara, "yes, it is. You want to stop, you want to try and be normal, you truly do, but no matter how hard you try those urges are still there but you can get help. Curb those impulses so you never hurt another person again. Giving into them will only make it worse.”

"You-you-you know what it's like?"

"Yes, I do. I have ADHD and a form of Bipolar called Cyclothymia, and… I developed a disorder from an extended period of trauma when I was fifteen. I had always had impulses but then… they were compulsions, but I learned to resist. I had to for the sake of my dad. My entire life people have been screaming at me to stay still, to pay attention, to listen, to try harder, to focus, that I'm just lazy, that I'm just selfish because I'm oblivious to other people's feelings, that I'm not paying attention to see the obvious, that I'm too slow, that I'm too dramatic, that I'm too sensitive, that I have no commitment, or that I’m not trying when I am! And it's infuriating because they won't listen to you when you try to explain it to them because they refuse to admit that they're in the wrong. Ever! It makes you wanna scream or do something drastic 'cause maybe then they'll listen. Believe me, I understand that so much better than you think. I bet people have told you things that frustrate you to no end because you can’t stop it."

Clara looked at her and nodded. 

"Why won't they understand?" Her voice trembled slightly.

"You have a mental illness. It's not your fault. You just can't help it. You don't know how to live with the urges yet."

"What is it? What's wrong with me?" She asked.

"There's nothing wrong with you. It's just more severe than most cases are."

"What is it?" She pleaded, tearfully.

"We think it's OCD. Most likely a subtype of OCD called Scrupulosity OCD. You survived that fire and your mom claimed it was God, you were young and this claim imprinted on you; you became hyper-vigilant towards religion. You pray multiple times a day, right? The obsessions can range from harmless to destructive. Perfection to anarchy. Irrational thoughts of anxiety. You’re failing this semester triggered this right? You became deeply stressed which made it so much worse. The urges aren't just in your head but the irrationality is. God is not going to do something bad if you do something bad or if you don't give in. The only bad thing that will happen is the death of your chemistry friends. Just give me the flare."

"What if..."

"It's just a 'what if'. Nothing bad will happen. I promise you. Tell me you believe me."

"Will I be okay?"

"Yes, you will. We'll get you some help and no jury or judge is going to go against the mental disorder defense when this goes to court and hears what you have to say. You're not evil; you’re not a bad person. You're just confused and sick, but that's not your fault. There's—there's no one really at fault here. No one knows what causes Scrupulosity OCD. As far as we know OCD brains may have an imbalance of the neurotransmitter serotonin; the best we can guess is that it's due to genetic factors, environmental factors from either your family environment, your-your social environment, or by your rural or urban environment, depending on where you grew up, or a combination of the two. Maybe you had dysfunctional family life or you felt lonely, you felt unworthy, or maybe you have a history of mental health in your family but no one knew about it. Please, just give me the flare. Do you believe me?"

"Nothing bad will happen?"

"No. Everything will be just fine." Zoe reassured her.

"You'll make me better?” Clara asked.

"Yes and I know some people who specialize in Scrupulosity and OCD and both. They're really good and they have OCD themselves. They can help you." Zoe promised.

"Promise?"

"I promise. Cross my heart and hope to die." Zoe said and she let go of Clara's wrists and held her hand out. 

Her hands trembling and tears running down her cheeks, Clara handed her the stick, muttering apologies in threes before taking a pause before repeating as she cried.

Zoe tapped the flare against the floor, firmly as if separating ash from a cigar until it broke apart.

Clara flung herself at Zoe, hugging her and sobbing, still muttering in intervals of three.

Zoe hugged her back, resting her chin on Clara’s head that was buried into her chest before she looked at Hotch like, can't reason with an Obsessive-Compulsive, huh.

Gideon and Alexander made it to the hall behind Zoe as Zoe comforted Clara.

———————————————————————————

Zoe hadn't just been trying to stall Clara, she had been serious, she made some calls and stayed with Clara. She would be institutionalized, obviously kept away from flammable substances. Clara had clung to her sobbing as Zoe stroked her hair, whispering to her but eventually she had to be arrested. Zoe promised she see her at the station.

"I thought you said not to reason with her?" Zoe said, turning away from the car once it had taken off towards the station, she was now facing Hotch.

"I was trying to stall."

"I wasn't." She said.

"I know. How'd you know that work?"

"Hotch, I've had ADHD since forever. I'm Cyclothmic and we both know the problems from... these disorders can alienate you from others, make you feel totally alone in the world, like there's something wrong with you more so than just a mental disorder. Being told you're not alone can do so much more than you think. Since she's highly religious, it was unlikely she even knew she had a disorder, she chalked it up to the power of God but she was scientific and rational so hearing there was a rational conclusion got her attention and someone empathizing with something she thought she was totally alone with living with... she believed me and I wasn't lying, I'm going to make some calls. I told you I know what I'm doing."

"I am... I am sorry. I should've believed you. You can relate to Clara's neurodivergent disorder because you also have a neurodivergent disorder. I thought there was no getting through to her but you did."

"Yeah, well, we're all a little mad here. Remember my interview. I told you that it would save lives to employ someone with a disorder that affects their behavior and you didn't say anything but I knew you didn't believe me." Zoe said.

"I think after a few more cases like this in a year or so, you deserve a promotion." Hotch said.

"Promotion? To what? I like where I am now." She frowned.

"You'll still have your job, just some extra responsibility."

"Nooooo." She whined like this was the worst thing possible.

"It's mostly just a title and you'll be in charge of cases with mentally ill UnSubs." 

"What's the title? I don't think there's a job in the BAU with that job description?"

"Well, your dad is the mentally ill semi-widowed co-founder of the BAU with one of his daughter’s still missing and he does whatever he wants and would do anything for you so if he wants to make up a job title for you, he can." Hotch said. “Forensic Psychiatrist.”

Zoe mocked gasped, "Are you not an emotionless robot, Hotch?" 

"Okay." Hotch said and walked off.

"What!? Come on! Sarcasm's my thing! Everyone knows that! Hotch!" Zoe called after him with a huge grin on her face. Then she got on her motorcycle and drove for the station.

———————————————————————————

On the jet the next day, Elle told Gideon, "You know, I figured it out. The stutter." And she sat down.

"You know why the Footpath Killer stuttered?" Gideon asked as Zoe was getting on the plane, on her phone talking about Clara's institutionalization.

"When you and Hotch were talking earlier, that's when I got it. He said he was just trying to stall Clara." Elle said.

"Right." Gideon nodded.

"Well, that's it, isn't it? The Footpath Killer.  You were just trying to stall him. You said, 'I know why you stutter' because you were buying time. You were stalling. But you don't really know why he stuttered."  Elle explained.

"I don't?"

"I looked it up. No one does." Elle said.

"There are some theories about a neurological basis." Gideon said, putting down his bag.

"But they're just theories." Elle pointed out and leaned forwards, "What really happened in the convenience store?"

"Do you know how Zoe's first case with the BAU?" Gideon asked.

Elle frowned, not sure how that was related and shook her head.

"They were dealing with a narcissistic cab driver, Ian Keller, with a high IQ, killing smart people who had what he never could get but he didn't kill Zoe. Why?"

"She was smarter?"

"Yes but not how she did it. Zoe has a way of getting control in situations, she points out flaws and makes the killers listen to her and she even snarks at them."

"Yes, I've noticed that." Elle deadpanned.

"She consistently insulted his intelligence, she provoked him so he wouldn't want to kill her in order to prove her wrong." Gideon said; Zoe had always done this. "I'll tell you what I do know about a stutter. I know how to provoke one."

———————————————————————————

The Footpath Killer had the shotgun to Gideon's back, walking him down the corridor. He pointed above Gideon's head to the top of the door frame belonging to a door that Gideon was facing.

"The key." He said and Gideon reached for the key and unlocked the door, opening it. Gideon recoiled, presumably from the smell. He was walked to a refrigerator with thirteen pictures of men all killed with bullets to the head, some were labeled with various notes to some but they didn't make too much sense without context. Except for the last. There were seven more victims that they never knew about.

The Footpath killer moved around, still pointing the shotgun at Gideon's face.

"Thirteen."  The Footpath killer said

"We only found six." Gideon said.

"Are you impressed?" He asked.

"Yeah. I didn't know you could count." Gideon provoked, "Our profile said you'd be too stupid. We also said you're be a chronic bed-wetter."

The Footpath Killer cocked his gun , pointing it closer to Gideon's face and started to stutter, "You-y-y-yo-Y..."

"What?" Gideon asked.

"Th-th-th-the cam—"

I don't know what you're trying to say." Gideon continued.

The Footpath Killer glanced where a Polaroid camera was sitting as he continued to stutter, getting more and more agitated. "You take th-the cam—the cam—the cam—"

Gideon smiled and continued to taunt the killer, "I'm sorry, I have no idea what you're trying to say."

"You take—you take the cam—the cam—the cam—"

"Say it." Gideon said.

"The ca—"

"Say it." Gideon repeated.

"The ca—"

"Just spit it out. Just..."

"The cam—"

Gideon grabbed the gun and they both wrestled for it until Gideon used the side of the shotgun to knock the killer to the floor.

Looks like Zoe's profile had been right.

———————————————————————————

Faulkner once said, "Don't bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than yourself."

Gideon was looking the chessboard that he was playing against Spencer who was turning a chess piece in his hands, then he smiled and cleared his throat.

"Check in three." He said; Zoe having finished her calls about Clara sat next to him.

"Not bad." Gideon said as Spencer suddenly shifted in his seat, straightening his posture.

Spencer smiled at Gideon.

Gideon looked back down at the chess, imagining the next three moves and he looked back at Zoe who was looking at him, knowing Gideon had check next.

Gideon took Spencer's white bishop with his black rook and said, "Checkmate." And he started to reset the board. "Don't worry, you're gettin' there." He turned to Zoe, "How's Clara?"

"I got her set up at a clinic that specializes with that particular kind of OCD. It... it wasn't her fault. She didn't ask for what happened to her to happen. Some things are just beyond our control."

*Thinking something bad will happen isn't necessarily a symptom of ADHD, I know that, I've had ADHD since I was three years old, but I do have terrible anxiety from being screamed most of the examples Zoe gave by someone who knew I had ADHD but seemed to think I didn't have the symptoms or that I was doing what I was doing because I wanted to which led to me being perpetually scared that verbal abuse may turn to physical abuse so much so that I once went out of my room to check if the stove was off twenty times because I don't trust my own mind anymore because I sometimes just do things absentmindedly out of habit and have no memory of doing them and I was blamed for things so often that I started blaming myself for everything, now I likely have a guilt complex (it didn't help that they once shouted at me that they had put their whole life on hold for me when I didn't ask for that or for them to interact with me at all) It got to the point, it was like I expected the person shouting at me to just melt out of the shadows which I knew was irrational, even when they were in Europe! So, it's not so much an ADHD thing as an anxiety and a paranoia thing.

Zoe having it, you'll see more into her past and why she's so closed off and where Zarah is.

This episode really shows how empathetic Zoe really is, how similar she is to Spencer despite her personality being nearly the opposite. Rather than do the most effective thing and use force, Zoe empathizes even though the chances of her getting through to Clara are unlikely but she persists, she uses her experiences in mental health to sympathize and empathize. That's the core of Zoe Noble-Valdez.*

*Let me know if I got anything wrong*

[occupyhades]

God’s Whistleblower

The eyes of the LORD are in every place, keeping watch on the evil and the good. Proverbs 15:3 (ESV)

You snakes! You brood of vipers! How will you escape being condemned to hell? Matthew 23:33 (NIV) 

When Jesus saw what was happening, he was angry with his disciples. He said to them, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children." Mark 10:14 (NLT)

We know that anyone who has been born of God does not keep on sinning. 1 John 5:18 (ESV)

You have heard that our ancestors were told, ‘You must not murder. If you commit murder, you are subject to judgment.’ Matthew 5:21 (NLT)

Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. Ephesians 5:11 (ESV)

Wake up! Strengthen what remains and is about to die, for I have found your deeds unfinished in the sight of my God. Apocalypse 3:2 (NIV)

Remember, therefore, what you have received and heard; hold it fast, and repent. But if you do not wake up, I will come like a thief, and you will not know at what time I will come to you. Apocalypse 3:3 (NIV)

[bisexual-problem]

I have a story about my family that I want to share, but it's so sad, and I live in the shadow of it and will for the rest of my life. All of these facts are true. Putting it under a cut, as it's long and contains child rape, incest, and domestic violence.

My grandfather was an exceptional person. The youngest child of 12 kids, he was thrown in the fireplace by his father when he was born and his mother had to jump out of her bed after giving birth to save him. This was 1932 in West Virginia. After 6th grade, he stopped going to school and became a mason, specializing in laying brick. I remember his thumbs were flat and his hands were rock hard from it.

When he was 14, he knew a 12 year old girl that was being passed around by patrons at a local bar, her parents would sell her to customers for extra cash, very hush hush. He told my mom years later that he once saw her skipping stones on the river and they looked at each other and fell in love. He burned that bar down to the ground and they ran away together some years later. But she wasn't a princess or a lady, she would jump at touching, sleep in corners on the dirt floor, and scream herself awake at night. She was my grandfathers first wife, and last love.

I don't know if that experience with that poor woman made him desire children, I don't know if it was nature or nurture, but when he was 27, he began a physical relationship with my grandma who was 16. Very shortly after, my mom was born even after my grear-grandmother pushed my grandmother down the stairs and beat her to try to abort my mom. My grandmother was a rejecting, emotionally immature parent, and it permanently harmed all five of her children for life. And while my mom, aunts and uncles were begging for love from her, my grandfather was physically and psychologically abusive as well. I'm glad I didn't know him then, he was said to have a switch that I only saw flipped a few times when he would shoot guns in the house at my uncles or aunts. Thinking about it, several of the homes I grew up in had bullet holes in them.

He molested my mom the second she started her first period. I think she was maybe 9 or 10 at the most. My mom is so short and so small as a person, even as an adult she's barely 5 feet tall, and wears a shoe size 5 and a half. I have cried myself to sleep thinking of how terrorized my mom was for years and years. She told me that she accepted it and martyred herself for her younger sisters.

'I thought that if it was just me, it was okay, as long as he didn't touch them, but he did and I only found out about it 2 or 3 months after I got married. I got a call from [one of them] crying and sobbing because I had abandoned them in that house and our collected pain. I drove over there and started a screaming match with your Grandma over it. I sceamed and screamed that she let this happen and never protected us or even loved us and she said we were never molested and that she could never love any of us and then shortly after [the youngest of us] turned 18 some two or three years later, she ran away and never came back."

My mom graduate high school in 1983. She married that year at 18 to a 17 year old mommas boy who raped her in her sleep and forced himself on her. For years and years of extreme child rape, my mom became victim again by a man who was supposed to love her. He said her night terrors were "annoying" and (to this day this hurts mom) he married a gorgeous girl and that's all he cared about her. He didn't want her to get a job despite them meeting at a mutual high school job, and when she asked to go to counseling for their marriage, he said no. So she went for the years of sexual abuse, and when they divorced due to my mothers affair (he was cheating too, but since I was born, it was Her Fault), HIS LAWYER brought up that she was in therapy and got records of her sessions and she lost all custody of my sister and brother. It broke my brother and my sisters heart, my mother was and is such a fantastic, kind, gentle person who has never deserved any of the pain she has gone through. She is the light of my life, and it's only just within the past few years of my mother being free of manipulative, horrible, abusive partners that she can finally work to have them in her life again.

I love my grandpa, and though I didn't really know my grandma, I feel so sad for her life and that they both died incomplete people. Some years ago, when I was in 1st or second grade, my mom and my grandfather had a discussion about the incest. I don't remember much of it, but I remember him crying and begging for forgiveness and mom forgiving him and them both moving past it. The sadistic, horrible person he was in some way was reformed by the freedom he himself sought in breeding fancy fish and farming and building contraptions. He taught me how to shoot a gun at 6, he taught me how electricity worked at 5, he never touched me and loved me like he should have his own daughter. I'm glad my mom got to see that and be a part of it. She is the strongest person I know ans I love her so much.

[sharksa-shivers]

Lil ramblin bout Kristy's family cuz why not tho?

I mean...You didn't think that wouldn't come up in the series did you lmaooooo??? Cuz it absolutely does lol... OH does kidnap Kristy/hires somebody to do it for her. But OH DOES NOT bar Kristy from contacting her family or anything...Kristy is even able to go home at some points... Soooooooo that will be a thing that happens...It doesn't happen INSTANTLY in the show but after a small bit, Kristy's able to get back in contact with her family... Kristy's family consists of her mom, her brother and her dad. The one we see the most of is Josh, her older brother/og best friend. Josh is 17 andddddd he was pretty fucked up by the whole uhhhh Kristy getting kidnapped thing (like everybody else in his family) But Josh seems to be the most understanding and supportive in her family of everything going on. Probably helps too that Josh is also autistic andddddd his hyperfixation is ghosts/paranormal stuff/supernatural stuff so while he's terrified his little sis is having to deal with this crazyass shit...He's pretty goddamn interested himself honestly lol...Sometimes he'll even visit the Campsite for a small bit to catch up with his sister...(Josh is very weary though of her 2 new friends...One's a literal shark and this dog guy seems like he's got some screws loose...) Kristy's mom and dad i'll talk about kinda together... They both are divorced and Kristy's mom has full custody while her dad moved out of state to Texas while Kristy, Josh and their mom live in Virginia before uhhhhh everything happens lmaooooo... Their parents do not get along really at all but both care a ton about their kids despite everything...They both shittalk each other pretty constantly but they seem to set it aside...Somewhat whenever Kristy literally gets fucking kidnapped...Josh and Kristy both admit they hate whenever their parents do that shit or try to get them to play favorites or other shit like that... Alsoooooo, the big question i am sure you're wondering... How tf does Kristy's family take her dating Sharky? ...If you guessed not well lmao, you'd be correct...Both of her parents are scared absolutely shitless of Sharky and the thought of Sharky being with their daughter but uhhhhhh...Yknow how i mentioned that whole thing about Kristy trying to assert her autonomy and whatnot? Yeah, this is one of those things she tries to do that for. She'll argue and argue in favor of Sharky and will talk about how it's her life, not theirs soooooo they'll need to get over it yeah that doesn't go very well with them lmaooooo

Josh is more understanding here and...By the time Sharksty happens, Josh has met Sharky a few times so...He's at least moreon board with it then their mom and dad are lol...Josh is...Still udderly befuddled by the relationship though and does worry still... --- Bonus lil thing lol: Thinking about how earlier on Josh sees Sharky and Sharky's more average sized and him and Kristy are friends and then just like…One of the next times Josh sees Sharky, he's fat and him and Kristy are dating then lmao, like damn Idk but thinkin bout a scene where Josh sees Sharky again and he's with Kristy and Josh is like "Your friendo seems to have put on some weight lmao." And Kristy's like "Boyfriend and also no, don't, he's sensitive about that, Don't be a rudeass -_-" and then Josh just stops dead and he's like "…….Boyfriend? Wait, did i hear you right??" (Don't know if above will be cannon butttttt i like the idea lmao, idk, just like...That bit is amusing to me but also sweet Kristy's so caring about Sharkyboi...)