#How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back Podcast

[pitchsidestories]

treat you better (2) II Ingrid Engen x Mapi León x Reader

part 1 I masterlist I word count: 1438

a/n: Hi, we hope you'll love part two as much as part 1 and thanks to @briggtea for sending us the idea for the oneshot.

You stumbled upon that podcast snippet accidentally while scrolling bored through Instagram while your girlfriends were getting ready for bed in the bathroom of the hotel room you were staying in. Nights before big Champions League games always made you feel a bit restless.  It was a queer podcast about sports you enjoyed, that’s why you clicked on it, but you couldn’t stop watching it when you noticed the guest was your ex-girlfriend.

In the scene the host asked her grinning:” How would you rate y/n on a scale from 1 to 10?”

“Maybe a two if I’m being nice.”, your former lover replied with a smug smile on her lips, you wished you could take away from the fellow footballer.

“Oh wow, seems like you got an unpopular opinion here, the internet goes crazy for her.”, the interviewer whistled impressed by the reply of your ex-girlfriend.

“The internet’s falling for her looks. She’s not that great to be with.”, she shrugged.

“So, the rumours are true, you two were together?”, the host curiously lifted an eyebrow at her.

“Maybe. All I can say is that she wasn’t very committed.”, the football player answered laughing which was obviously a blatant lie. After all she was the one who cheated around in London not the other way around.

“That’s bullshit!”, Mapi yelled furiously before ripping the phone out of her hands to throw it on to the bed.

“Babe.”, Ingrid tried soothing your Spanish girlfriend with her calm voice.

“She’s basically gaslighting her!”, the defender protested enraged, shaking off the hand the Norwegian had laid on her shoulder.

“Maria, relax. I know she does, and we’ll prove her wrong on the pitch tomorrow.”, you told her calmly.

 “On the pitch? She’s going around spreading rumours about you when she was the one who cheated on you!”, Mapi snorted angrily.

“No, you don’t understand, amor. She’ll hate losing against us.”, you pointed out.

“I believe you that, but I’d like to hurt her in in more ways than just that.”, she hissed, sounding almost like Bagheera when he was ready to fight whatever caught the cat’s eyes.

“I appreciate it, but trust me, she’s not worth it. Come on we should go to bed.”, you assured her in a soft tone.

“Fine.”, the Spanish player sighed, exhaustion was catching up with her. Quickly she and Ingrid laid down, you were in their middle.

“Sleep well, my loves.”, Ingrid gave each of you a good night kiss.

“Good night, girls.”, you whispered, once again feeling very lucky to have them in your life.

“Night.”, Mapi mumbled, already half-asleep. Sleep took the three of you in quick succession.

You tried to focus on yourself as best as you could while you got ready for the game. Ignore the noise, forget about your ex. There was just you and the game in front of you.

Even the chatter of your teammates faded into the background until something touched your elbow.

“Y/n?“

You looked up to Alexia studying your face.

“Yes, Capi?“

“Do you feel ready?“, she asked.

You watched a small line between her eyebrows as she frowned.

Nodding once, you replied: “Ready and focused.“

“Good.“

“Don’t worry.“, you assured her and forced yourself to a smile.

Alexia shook her head, considering you: “I just don’t want you to do anything stupid out there.“

“I won’t. You know I’m not the type such behaviour.“

“I’m just saying…“

You sighed, locking eyes with her: “Promise.“

This seemed to relax your captain. She nodded slowly and then clapped her hands: “Alright, let’s win this then.“

“Please.“, you agreed. You refused to imagine your ex cheering with her teammates.

Ingrid squeezed your hand as she passed you: “Come on.“

“Coming.“, you smiled back at her.

Mapi appeared on your side right as you were about to walk out on the pitch. She nodded into the direction of a very familiar ponytail: “There she is.“

Apparently, she had felt your gaze on her because in that exact moment, she turned around and flashed you a bright smile.

You swallowed hard as she walked towards you, all innocence: “Hi.“

“Hi, good luck.“, you answered plainly.

“You’ll need it more.“, she smirked.

It took you a lot not to roll your eyes about her arrogance. Instead you shrugged: “I think you’re wrong about this.“

You jogged onto the field to warm up, leaving her behind to watch.

The first half of the game remained calm as you had expected. Both teams testing the waters, not risking too much that early in the game. Barcelona had more chances but had not used them yet. You know you had to be more clinical in the next fourty-five minutes.

In the second half, the whole game changed. It got rougher, more aggressive and you had your problems with that.

It was more than frustration, it was pure anger. Your exes smug grin, the unnecessary fouls by the other team, the unsuccessful attacks. You just wanted to scream.

You took a deep breath and gathered yourself, there was no use. You had to stay focused.

It worked until the seventieth minute. Chelsea was on attack but Mapi won the ball easily. She hesitated for a half a second before passing it to Lucy.

Your ex saw this moment of hesitation as an opportunity. She wanted to win the ball back with a slide tackle but her timing was off. She crashed into Mapi, her studs colliding with your girlfriends ankle.

Mapi was on the grass, screaming in pain while your ex got up, unfazed by the incident. There was not even an apology.

Ingrid was already kneeling beside your girlfriend when you ran over to them.

“Shit.“, the Spanish defender cursed under her breath.

“Mapi, are you okay?!”, you asked her deeply worried.

“Yeah.”, she answered through gritted teeth.

“I swear she did it intentionally. I’m going to.”, you begun.

But a firm, big hand prevented you from walking up to your former girlfriend.

“No, you’re not doing anything.”, Alexia interrupted you, her voice dripping with determination.

“Stay calm and carry on, y/n.”, Marta added.

“But.”, you started.

“Score the winning goal for us.”, Aitana suggested with a wink, hoping it would stop you from doing something stupid.

“It doesn’t work like that, Aitana.”, you reminded her.

“Maybe it does.”, she replied encouragingly. While your gaze followed a hurt Mapi who got subbed off. A spark of extra motivation hit you when you saw that. Maybe the Catalan midfielder was right about that.

It was the last minute of the game when your chance arrived to turn the draw into a win, Caroline played a cross to you which you only had to head in with your head. It was a goal, Barcelona has won once more against the English team.

Aitana jumped into your opened arms.” See? I told you so.”, she cheered.

“There’s no fucking way.”, you could hear your ex-girlfriend scolding, shooting mad glances at you from afar, but you couldn’t care less.

As the referee blew the final whistle you sprinted to the bench where Ingrid and Mapi were the first to pull you into a group hug.

“We won girls!”, you laughed happily.

“You were amazing.”, the Spanish defender whispered proudly into your ear.

“And your goal was amazing.”, the tall dark-haired woman beamed at you.

“Thank you. Have you seen her face after I scored?”, you wanted to know from them with a hint of malicious joy.

“She deserved that.”, Mapi noted.

“How are you feeling? Her foul looked bad.”, you suddenly remembered, looking concerned at your girlfriend.

“I’m okay. She went right for the ankle, but it’s not too bad.” she calmed you.

“At least that.”, you let out a sigh of relief.

“Don’t worry about me.”, the heavily tattooed woman said.

“Come on, girls, time to celebrate that win properly.”, Ingrid intervened smiling.

“Yes, y/n deserves it.”, Mapi agreed smirking.

“And we make sure she gets her reward for her great game and her bravery.”, the Norwegian continued delighted.

“Oh, we’ll.”, your other girlfriend shared a knowing glance with her.

“Girls.”, you blushed listening to their words.

“We’re just proud of you.”, Ingrid declared.

“And we’ll show you how proud later tonight.”, the defender winked.

“We can’t just leave now.”, you protested, pointing to the rest of their teammates who were still celebrating.

“No one will notice trust us.”, the Scandinavian argued.

“Alright, let’s go.”, you give in, knowing fully well that your girlfriends would always treat you better than your former lover. And the night had just begun, it was set to be unforgettable.

[cvpidzcvrse]

Nah, I'm Better.

divider by @cafekitsune

✦A/N: OK! this took longer than expected but LISTEN! I'm here now and probably will be dropping more frequently (hopefully). Reader is also a slut I mean she could talk me through it and I'd let her. But I tried to eat down as much as possible for this fic so the girlies and the gays wouldn't starve. Gojo is driving my dream car, a girl can only imagine.

⋆.ೃ࿔*･Synopsis: You and Satoru have been best friends since elementary school. By the time you both made it to college he’s hated every single partner you’ve ever had. Your recent ex isn’t any different, but he’s doing something about it this time.

⋆.ೃ࿔*･wc: 2,887

⋆.ೃ࿔*Warnings: best friends to lovers, praise, car sex, arguments (ish), cowgirl, choking, handjob, p in v, no protection, finishing inside (practice safe sex)

(the reader is black)

If you had a dollar for every time you and Satoru got mistaken for a couple you’d be rich, not richer than him. He loves it when people mistake him for your boyfriend. It’s the ego boost he doesn’t need. He’s liked you for a while but you always shut him down. Either for another guy or because you see him as just a “friend”. You knew that was a lie, you didn’t want to ruin the friendship between you guys. So to buried your feelings for Satoru and used other men as a distraction. Fuck buddies, friends with benefits, sugar daddies, you name it. Nothing was ever successful; it always ended in heartbreak or fights. Satoru hated that you went for men who were lower than your standard.

He hated that you didn’t go for him. That’s part of the reason why he’s parked outside a fancy restaurant waiting for you to walk out.  

You thought this guy was the one, you’d been talking for a couple weeks, going on dates, even fucked a few times. But no people always have to ruin it, it was fun while it lasted. Mahito was a guy you met off of Tinder. He was nice, sweet, and probably the realest guy you’ve ever met. That was until date number four when he brought up his love for podcasts. Specifically a podcast by the name ‘Fresh and Fit’, you know the podcast that goes around and hates on women for a check. 

What a loser…

After learning that information you left the date immediately. Leaving him with a “Get a life, nigga.” before quickly walking out of the restaurant. The cold drizzle of rain calms your nerves as you heave out a soft sigh. Your eyes meet a familiar and sleek all-black Ford Bronco. An air of comfort travels throughout your body. You haven’t been this excited to see Satoru since…ever. He’s already looking in your direction with his cheeky smile, flashing you his pearly white teeth. He’s always been handsome, your whole life was spent watching girls and even guys swoon over him. You can’t even remember if he accepted any of the advances, you don’t even think he’s had a girlfriend that you know of.

His jagged blue eyes met your dark brown ones and it’s like a firework went off in front of you. Your waist-length knotless braids, glossy plump lips, and warm brown skin have him in a chokehold. The way your honey-glazed skin complimented your outfit made him want to rip it off right there. Luckily his windows are tinted enough to hide his very noticeable lustful gaze, but you felt his eyes burning holes into your head. With a visible frown on your face, you swiftly open the car door. You come face to face with Satoru’s fuck boy grin, you almost melt on the spot.

“When I said ‘call me for emergencies.’ It didn’t include shitty dates.”

You roll your eyes before playfully punching his arm. Satoru speeds out of the parking lot before you can even put your seatbelt on. Your back hits the seat roughly before you send a glare Satoru’s way.

“Chill out, nigga damn. You didn’t even hear how the date went and you’re already mad.”

“I’m mad because you didn’t listen to me. I told you not to trust that fucking loser, now look at where we are.”

You could hear his eyes rolling before you saw it. He’s the leader of the sassy man apocalypse and he never denies it. You grimaced at the undeniable truth that he was right, and you knew it. You cross your arms over your chest and gaze out at the widow districting yourself with the scenery. 

“Hey…look at me.”

His light-hearted voice quickly melted in your ears like honey. He softly gripped your chin and turned your face to his. He analyzed your expression for a moment. Admiring your features, planning your future, imagining his cock inside of you. He’s quickly brought out of his thoughts when you playfully push his hand away. 

“Hands off, this makeup took time.”

He scuffs at your statement before looking back at the busy road. You analyze him for a while, taking in his features. Your thoughts are more innocent than his, and you hope it stays that way. 

“Listen…I’m sorry I didn’t listen. But, niggas man you don’t understand. They’re all so annoying.”

The more you think about your past rendezvous the more it turned into torture. Satoru knew about every failed date. He was always there to be a shoulder to cry on and a dick to ride if you asked him. He knows very well about your tragic love life, he doesn’t remember a successful relationship you’ve been in. He lectured you every time he picked you up from a bad date or situationship ending in ‘So, what are we?’. He wasn’t upset with you, he was more upset that you refused to see his obvious feelings for you. 

“This is just starting to get repetitive. (✧), This is just...nevermind”

He smacked his lips at the end of his statement. A habit he picked up from you after all of the years you two have spent together. His mouth opens to say something else but nothing comes out. He huffs and runs his hand through his hair, he’s frustrated by the current events.

“Don’t get an attitude with me. You think I want to date guys like this?”

Your accusatory tone makes his attention shift slightly from the road. He scans his brain for what to say. He doesn’t want to upset you anymore but he also didn’t want to sugarcoat anything. As a wannabe lover, he wants nothing but the best for you even if it means telling you a harsh reality. 

Your taste in men is shit. 

He doesn’t have enough fingers or toes to list off the amount of guys that hurt you in the past. Nanami was too formal for you, Toji was a bum that leeched off of you, Sukuna was an asshole, and Satoru would’ve killed Suguru if he even attempted to flirt with you. 

“No, you know what I mean. You deserve better than these dumbasses you go after.”

The venom in his voice is very noticeable. Satoru’s carefree nature is cracking under the stress of your love life. Your stubborn nature refuses to let you back down to him, especially when he’s like this. 

“Toru’ I can date and fuck who I want! I don’t need to be lectured by you. I understand that you care, but let me live my life.”

Your response almost sent Satoru out of the car. His eyes twitched in annoyance and his knuckles turned white from gripping the steering wheel. You watch the way his jaw tightened and his muscles flexed. It turned you on, a lot. As much as you hate to admit it, you looove making him mad. It was just the way his relaxed facade melted away when you threw careless sentences at him. His foot softly pressed on the brake when coming to a red light. He slowly shifted his body to face you, if looks could fuck he’d be fucking you right now. Just the thought of him bending you over the center console had your clit aching. 

“Do not say that, I will crash this car right now and kill us both.”

He glanced at you with a smirk trying to lighten the melancholy-stricken mood. You scuff at his childish antics.

“Oh my god, be for real-”

Ring…

Your phone buzzed in your purse, and your soon-to-be lecture got cut short. Your eyes widened when you saw the caller I.D. read ‘Mahito’. You let it ring for a few seconds before finally answering it. 

“Why are you calling me? I told you we were over.”

Satoru's ears perked when he heard the hostility in your voice. There was a snarky voice on the other end and they were loudly throwing a fit. His eyes analyzed your expression and the way your calmness was replaced with annoyance. 

“You don’t think I can do better than you?…You’re one goofy ass nigga, you know that?…Whatever, fuck you!”

You harshly shoved your phone into your purse and groaned. The awkward silence was almost tangible; you would have to cut it with a chainsaw. Mahito’s words circled in your head and it pissed you off more and more. Who does he think he is? You hum slightly when a very filthy idea comes to your mind. 

“Satoru, I need you to take me somewhere.”

｡.｡:∞��*

“Why the fuck are we here? Please don’t tell me you’re about to do something stupid.”

Satoru’s tone is laced with worry and confusion. He has no clue why he was parked outside of Mahito’s house right now and he didn’t know why you wanted to come here. You give him a cheeky smile before unbuckling your seatbelt and slowly leaning over the center console. You’re incredibly close to Satoru’s face, your nose practically touching his. All you can do is stare sensually into his ice-blue eyes, but the sense of longing is undeniably visible. 

“What are you doing?”

His voice spills out lowly like silk touching your ears. You take in a breath before crashing your lips into his. He’s caught by surprise but that’s quickly replaced with lust. His veiny hands quickly trace every curve on your body and tangle his fingers in your braids. You pull away taking in the wonderful scenery that Satoru was turned into. His cheeks are flushed and his hair is messy. You both stare at each other in awe and affection. It’s like something was unlocked in the middle of this little plan of revenge. 

“Get in the back.”

You nod before watching him walk out and around as you climb in the back. He opens the back door and stares at you for a moment, taking in the way your skirt is hiked up and your shirt tousled around. He quickly gets in and closes the door, basically pouncing on you. His mouth attacks your neck quickly, leaving several bite marks and hickeys. Without breaking the kiss you roughly pushed him onto the car door behind him. He lets out a low groan and rests his hands on your waist. You reach down and fumble with his belt buckle before finally breaking the kiss and using your hands. 

“If you need help you could’ve just asked.”

“Shut up.”

He chokes out a gasp when you take his cock out of his boxers. You wrap your manicured hand around his big cock and slowly massage the length. You trace circles around his tip with your thumb. A low groan settles at the bottom of his throat as silence sighs escape his lips. He unscrewed his eyes to meet the brazen expression on your face. His chuckles and mixed moans are sending you over the edge. You reach down and caress your clit through your panties. Satoru doesn’t fall ignorant of this and quickly grabs your hand to stop the satisfying motion.

“Suck it, I want your mouth.”

He let out a low chuckle as you took his full length into your mouth. You let out a whine as the tip of his cock touched the back of your throat. Satoru’s head flew back in pleasure as his hand rested comfortably on top of your head. He can sense your greed from the way your tongue moves along his tip. He sighed out a moan and softly pushed your head down further. 

“F-fuck…you’re doing so well.”

He stifles a throaty moan with his free hand and laces his hands in your hair. You were quick to grab his wrist and yank his hand away. You trailed soft kisses up the length of his cock, from base to tip. 

“I wanna hear you, pretty boy. Let me hear you.”

Your voice was soothing and soft it probably could’ve put him to sleep if it weren’t for the current circumstances. He melted at your command and quickly left his hand to the side. You tease his leaking tip with your tongue before putting it all in your mouth again. His mouth goes agape as slutty moans spill out and his hands grip your hair tightly. The way your head is bobbing up and down on his cock has his mind going blank. His cock twitches in your mouth before he quickly shoves your head away.

“I don’t want to cum yet. C’mon get on top, ride what’s yours.”

You swiftly straddle his lap and he pushes your panties to the side. You wrap your arms around him as he slowly pushes you on his hard cock. You let a soft moan and tug at Satoru’s hair. He moans in response and pushes you down deeper.

“Shit…fuck me, c’mon.”

His mouth is hovering over your ear and his voice is low and seductive. You slowly start to rock your hips and grind on his cock. After adjusting to his size you messily start bouncing on his cock. Strings of curses spew out of his mouth and his grip on your waist gets tighter. 

“Like this baby? Mmph…you’re so big.”

The constant praise is making the blood rush to his face. He hides his blushing face in your shoulder and leaves several bite marks. The car windows turn foggy and the only thing illuminating the car is the moonlight. Satoru’s moans can probably be heard from blocks away. His hands are under your sweater groping and squeezing your plush breast. His fingers pull and twist at your nipples as your pace gets messy. 

“Give me your hand…”

His voice is carnal and vibrating in your ear. It makes your clit twitch and your tempo stagger. You untangle your hand from his hair and place your hand in his. He takes two of your fingers and places them in his mouth. He doesn’t break eye contact, he’s just looking at you like a meal waiting to be devoured. He slowly sucks them and swirls his tongue around them. The scene in front of you is so sensual and slow, you’ve never experienced something so intimate before. He slowly pulls your fingers out of his as a saliva trail is the only thing left behind.

“Play with your clit for me. I wanna watch while you bounce on my cock.”

His voice moves like velvet through your body. It’s like he’s talking right to your pussy and she’s answering very loudly. The moment your hand reaches your clit Satoru plunges his cock into you. His thrust gets more violent and his large cock attacks your cervix. Your head dips back in pleasure in the constant assault on your insides. 

He’s starting to unravel like a present. His strokes get messier, sweet liquid spilling everywhere, his moans getting louder and more frequent. His nail prints are embedded on your love handles and your thighs are a wet mess. 

“Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me, fuck me. C’mon baby you can do it.”

His pleading sends shivers down your spine. You’ve never seen him so desperate before, it was empowering that your pussy brought him down a few notches. His pussy drunk stare is intoxicating to look at. The way he’s looking at you with his eyes half-lidded with nothing but lust in them. There was something about the way he looked at you; it wasn't just lust. It was like you were a necessity to him, he needed you.

“Mmph…baby I’m ‘bouta cum!”

“Cum for me, you’d make me so proud. Cum on my cock princess.”

Satoru replaced your hand with his and traced circles on your clit. With his hand working its magic and his cock peppering kisses on your cervix sends you crazy. The car is rocking very noticeably but you could care less. Your climax crashes onto you like a ton of bricks. Your juices spill all over his thick cock and coat his length in a slippery mess. His warm and sticky ropes decorate your insides, leaving his pants soaked and a wet ring around the base of his cock.

“That’s it, I’m so proud of you baby.”

 He tenderly pulls out and holds you tight to him, taking in the moment. You rest your forehead on his shoulder, you both desperately trying to catch whatever air is left in your lungs. You hear Satoru chuckle slowly while tracing kisses on your neck. 

“What’s so funny? Did my pussy make you delirious or what?” 

He shakes his head and lifts your head softly and turns it towards the window. While swallowed by lust you didn’t notice Satoru rolled the window down. Mahito is staring in awe and anger; he looks like he is about to explode. Satoru’s chuckle turns into a full-blown cackle as he glances at Mahito, sending him that cheeky smile that you love so much. You join Satoru in his joyous laughter before reaching over and rolling up the window.

“At least my plan worked. Let’s do it again but this time with handcuffs.” 

[leahsgf]

SECRET LOVE - katie mccabe

katie mccabe x fem!reader

vaguely inspired by secret love song by little mix!

underneath the fluorescent glow of the lights beaming across the emirates stadium, you stood on the sidelines, your usual spot - as you watched your girlfriend shine and showcase her talent on the pitch. the chants of her name echoed around you when she won the ball through one of her famous tackles, and you couldn’t help but feel a swell of pride in your chest, knowing that you were surrounded by thousands of people equally as captivated by the irish woman as you were.

well, maybe not in the exact same way that you were, but they didn’t know that. nobody did. here, you were merely an addition to the blur of red and white shirts and scarves in the stands.

just another voice, merging with all of the others belting the chorus of ‘the angel’.

nothing special.

and with that thought, the cheers and applause surrounding you quickly became almost taunting, leaving a sense of unease lingering in the depths of your soul. behind the facade of her fame and success, and you being simply a fan, another face in the crowd making up a sold out stadium, lay a hidden truth. a truth that threatened to tear apart the already incredibly fragile fabric of your relationship.

you and katie had fallen in love against all odds and expectations, drawn together by what you would call fate - and a passion that transcended all possible boundaries. however, in a world, her world, where public image and professionalism was everything, especially with the way social media was changing - the revealing of your love would jeopardise not only katie’s career and standing within the football community, but your life too.

especially as you weren’t used to the madness of being a public figure.

katie had been in very public relationships in the past, and was determined this time to not give strangers, or to even her own ex a reason to merely look in your direction or attempt to ruin what the two of you had. you deserved more than being reduced to a gossip topic or stupid joke on a so called ‘podcast’ and your girlfriend insisted on not allowing this to happen to you. every move she made was plastered online and analysed to no end, and with that came walls and boundaries that she put up - and an even fiercer protectiveness over her loved ones. you particularly.

you had known this from the get go, and you knew more than anything that she loved you. but there were moments where your resolve cracked, and insecurities slipped through your one innocent, almost naive bubble of love.

as the final whistle blew, signifying a well earned arsenal win, you hung back - allowing the crowds around you to eventually disperse, with their signs begging for katie’s attention trailing by their feet, before finding your way to her, a well practiced routine that now didn’t even need to be said.

you hated that you felt envious of the fans around you, able to literally plaster their love for the girl, your girl, for everyone to see, without even an ounce of hesitation.

your usual car ride was oddly quiet on the way home, with you lost in your own thoughts and your girlfriend still winding down from the adrenaline rush of the game, and quickly sensing that something was up with you.

she knew that you had been struggling more and more with being almost like her little secret as time went on, and it killed her to watch you fade away before her eyes. but her desire to protect you was stronger than her ability to see just how much the tiniest action would affect you.

you knew it was playing on her mind too as she slipped her hand into yours when you were walking from the car up to her house. a short lived moment of happiness and almost relief, that you cut short when you noticed her head constantly turning - making sure nobody was watching, even in the darkness of the night enveloping you.

tears formed in your eyes at a speed in any other moment you would find embarrassing, as you dropped her hand and rushed ahead, ignoring her calls of your name trailing behind you.

and in an instant, her house, your usual refuge from the prying eyes of the outside world, turned from an escape to the place you were trying to hide from as you entered it, with katie not even a step behind you.

“baby please. talk to me.” her voice made you shiver, her being much closer to you than you had realised, and the scratch of her accent almost made you crumble entirely. it didn’t - but it did force your sudden guard down slightly, and allowed her to guide you towards the sofa with a hand on your back.

you sank into the plush of the cushions pathetically, a perfect match to the way you threw your head in your hands a second later. your thoughts were racing around your mind, and not showing signs of letting up for even a second. you’d gone from having one moment of vulnerability at a game to being convinced that your world was ending.

that you weren’t worth it, you never had been - and that she was going to leave you.

“sweetheart, look at me.” katie almost begged, now on her knees crouched on the floor in front of you, looking the most concerned you’d ever seen her, which made you feel beyond stupid.

you knew she loved you. any idiot could look at her now, notice the look in her eyes as she took in you and know that she loved you more than anything. so why was it so hard for you to see that?

why could you not just appreciate what you had and be happy?

any one of those fans sat around you tonight would kill to be you if they knew. and yet you’re near crying and refusing to look at her.

“it’s silly, i’m sorry, you had such a good game i shouldn’t be ruining it.” your words were no more than a mumble, spoken into the palms of your hands.

“no it’s not. nothing you feel is ever silly, i promise. talk to me.” she clasped your hands in hers, causing the now slowing tears to kick start again.

“i just- i’m just so tired of not being able to show the world how much i love you. i don’t want to be a secret anymore, all of the hiding is suffocating me and i don’t want that. i don’t want us to deny ourselves the chance to be truly happy. so many couples are out freely, why can’t we be like that? am i not enough? or do you not want to be with me? i- i just can’t do it anymore. i’m so sorry, katie.”

you closed your eyes when your ramblings trailed off into sniffles, not wanting to witness her reaction. she wanted this to be a secret - she was dead set on it. you weren’t prepared for this life. you didn’t know what it was like. all you thought would come from this conversation was her leaving you.

that surely was the only outcome here.

she didn’t reply for a few seconds. seconds that felt like hours as an unnerving, almost cold silence fell between the short distance between you.

“look at me.”

and for the first time since your emotions had taken over you - you made eye contact with her, staring into her eyes that you were convinced contained some kind of magic, holding the ability to completely bring down your walls just from a glance, every time.

“okay.” she spoke, so softly that you were almost convinced you’d misheard.

“okay what?” you looked at her, confusion visibly plastered all her your face - that in any other circumstance would’ve had her laughing and teasing you.

“we can do this.” her voice was so soft, so vulnerable that it made guilt seep into your veins.

“really, i don’t want you to feel forced i understand you don’t want-”

“baby. no. i want more than anything to show the world how much i love you. i just want to protect you from all of the negativity out there, but the last thing i wanted to do was push you away. if you’re ready, then so am i, kay?” she cut you off before you’d even had a chance to let your insecurities consume any more of you.

“and you are my absolute world. i’m sorry i let you doubt that for even a second. i love you so much it physically hurts - everything i do is for you, and i’m so beyond lucky to have you.”

and with her words, your tears returned once more - but instead for a completely different cause.

her lips were on yours in an instant, joining in a kiss that whilst mixed with salty tears - said everything that months worth of words could never.

you settled instantly in her arms, letting her hold you and literally kiss all of your troubles away.

-

“i’m gonna have to start training more then i guess!” she broke the first peaceful, happy silence of the evening abruptly, and confusing you even more than she had before at the randomness of her words.

“wait what? why?”

“because you are all mine. and look at ye! i’m going to have to fight off my competition now they’re going to know who you are!”

“there’s no competition, never has been.”

-

this is not proof read and is most likely the worst thing i’ve ever written but i was determined to actually get it out of my drafts

[estellan0vella]

Don't Look Her In The Eyes Older Brother Sukuna AU HFBU

You’re sitting at the front desk of the tattoo parlour, playing a lively game of Monopoly with Yuji and Megumi. The boys are engrossed in the game, laughing and teasing each other as they buy properties and collect rent. You’re enjoying the rare moment of downtime in the otherwise bustling shop.

Suddenly, the door swings open, and an unfamiliar yet irritatingly familiar figure strides in. It’s Yorozu, Sukuna’s ex-girlfriend. She has a haughty expression, and her eyes scan the room with disdain. You immediately feel a tension in the air as she approaches.

“I’m Yorozu,” she announces, her voice dripping with arrogance. “Heard of me?”

You glance up from the game, giving her a once-over. “I’d tell you what I’ve been told, but I don’t want you to start crying. Sukuna said your crying face was awful to look at.”

Sukuna, who’s been tattooing a client nearby, looks over with a smirk and pulls an exaggeratedly ugly crying face, making everyone in the room chuckle.

Yorozu’s face reddens with anger, but before she can retort, Gojo steps in with a mischievous grin. “Remember, guys, don’t look her in the eyes.”

Toji raises an eyebrow. “Why? Because we’ll turn to stone?”

Gojo shakes his head, still grinning. “No, her eyes are just really ugly.”

Geto snorts, unable to hide his laughter, while you bite back a smile. The atmosphere in the room shifts to one of amusement, the tension dissipating with each joke.

Yorozu tries to maintain her composure, but her irritation is evident. “He’ll come crawling back to me, you know.”

Toji lets out a loud laugh. “No, he won’t. You ain’t got tits like Y/N.”

Gojo jumps in, winking at you. “They’re the shop’s mascots, so they’re not going anywhere.”

Yorozu glares at you, her fists clenched at her sides. “You think you’re so special, don’t you?”

Sukuna, finishing up with his client, saunters over and wraps an arm around your shoulders. “Special? Y/N's got you beat in every department. Especially in the bedroom. You should see how she looks bent over—”

You quickly cover Yuji’s ears while Gojo covers Megumi’s, both of you laughing despite the situation. “Kuna!” you exclaim, playfully scolding him.

Yuji pulls away from your hand, wrinkling his nose. “Your perfume smells bad,” he tells Yorozu bluntly, pinching his nose for emphasis.

Megumi nods in agreement. “Yeah, you’re stinky.”

Gojo doubles over with laughter. “Looks like even the kids know what’s up.”

Yuji reaches into the Monopoly bank and hands Yorozu some fake money. “Here, for new perfume,” he says, his innocence making the gesture even funnier.

The room erupts in laughter, the adults barely able to contain themselves. Yorozu’s face twists with rage and embarrassment as she watches you laugh in her face. “You—”

Before she can finish, Toji steps forward, his expression serious. “I’d be careful. I’ve had to restrain Y/N when she hopped a counter and started beating up a man three times her size.”

You nod, crossing your arms with a grin. “And I don’t think you’d fare any better.”

Geto grins, leaning back in his chair. “Honestly, Yorozu, you’re just not worth the trouble.”

Yorozu’s eyes narrow, and she sneers at you. “You’re nothing special. Just another pretty face. Sukuna will get bored of you eventually.”

You roll your eyes, smirking. “You keep telling yourself that. Meanwhile, I’m the one he’s coming home to every night.”

“And coming in,” Sukuna adds with a wicked grin. The parlour erupts into raucous laughter at Sukuna’s comment, and even you can’t help but blush a little, nudging him playfully.

“Kuna!” you exclaim, trying to hide your embarrassment while covering Yuji’s ears. “You’re terrible!”

Gojo laughs uproariously, leaning against the counter for support. “Seriously, it’s like a soundtrack to our workday. At this rate, we should start charging admission.”

Toji, not wanting to be left out, chimes in. “Yeah, I mean, who needs a podcast when we've got live audio porn next door?”

You groan, covering your face with one hand while keeping Yuji's ears covered with the other, pressing his left ear against your leg as your hand covers his right ear. "Can we not?"

Toji shakes his head, chuckling. "I've walked in on them so many times, I might as well be part of the relationship."

Sukuna grins wickedly. "We could always use an extra set of hands, Toji."

Toji smirks, looking Sukuna up and down. “I might consider it.”

Gojo turns to Yorozu, who looks utterly flabbergasted. “We're all really close here,” he says with a grin that’s anything but innocent.

The room erupts in another round of laughter. Yorozu, clearly flustered and defeated, huffs and turns to leave. "You’re all disgusting," she snaps over her shoulder.

"Don’t let the door hit you on the way out!" Toji calls after her, still laughing.

As the door swings shut behind her, the laughter slowly subsides. Sukuna pulls you into a warm embrace, kissing the top of your head. “You handled that well, babe.”

You lean into him, smiling. “Couldn’t have done it without all of you.”

Yuji, now free from your hands, looks up at you with a grin. “We won, Y/N/N!”

Megumi nods enthusiastically. “Yeah, we beat the bad lady!”

You laugh, ruffling both boys’ hair. “Yes, we did. And we’ll always stick together, no matter what.”

Sukuna tightens his hold on you, his voice low and affectionate. “Always, baby.”

Gojo, never one to miss a beat, winks at you. “So, who’s up for another round of Monopoly?”

You shake your head, smiling. “Only if you promise to keep the jokes PG this time.”

“To be fair, they’re always PG,” Gojo says with a wink. “Pretty Good.”

Everyone groans at the bad pun, but the laughter and warmth in the room are undeniable. In the end, it’s clear that no matter what challenges come your way, you have an unbreakable bond with the people who matter most.

[barcameowski]

𝐂𝐔𝐏𝐈𝐃𝐎 ⁻ gavi/ruben dias part2

pairing: gavi x (ex) singer!argentinian!reader , ruben dias x singer!argentinian!reader

warnings: none

face claim: tini stoessel

𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽

liked by pablogavi , pedri , rubendias and 561,000 others

yourusername: love comes and goes ❤️‍🩹

view comments

rubendias: 😍

⇝ liked by creator

user1: LETS GOO COMMENTS ARE OPENNN

user2: she posted !!!

user3: siempre guapisima

⇝ liked by creator

user5: ruben ? mi amor what are you doing here?

user6: is my husband cheating?

user7: I highly doubt that they’re dating, a lot of celebrities like her posts and comment

user8: she’s so gorgeous

user9: revenge era?

user10: she’s better than me bc if I got cheated on I would’ve blocked him and never show my face ever ever again

user11: I just got arrested but I can never miss a yn post

⇝ yourusername: …do you need some bail money?

user12: can’t wait for revenge music

user13: bestie please drop an album

user14: I wanna know the full story

⇝ user15: apparently she grew up with cecilia and it was a “oh no I fell in love with my best friends longterm boyfriend!” situation

⇝ user16: someone get her on a podcast

user17: she always spoke so highly on gavi and their relationship and this is how he treats her

_ferminlopez: ❤️

⇝ liked by creator

liked by ceciliaramirez and 33,000 others

ynupdates: yn seen at manchester city match!! hate to admit this but this is fueling the rumors of her and manchester city player ruben dias.

view comments

author: I tried my best to edit the photo of tini in the argentina de paul jersey but it doesn’t look good so just ignore it

user1: the girl gavi cheated on her with liked this post wtf

user2: she moved on so fast from the breakup ☹️☹️☹️

⇝ user3: please gavi moved on before the break up

user4: she’s so beautiful

user5: you already know ruben wouldn’t cheat on her

user6: ugh her and haaland would be an iconic couple

⇝ user7: haaland has a girl and he’s expecting a baby sooooo

user8: ruben and her r both so fineee

user9: she really likes footballers I guess

user10: she’s so supportive

user11: I have hope her and gavi will get back together !!

ceciliaramirez: 🥰🥰

⇝ user12: get this thing away from me

⇝ user13: lmaooo

user14: this is the first thing I saw when I woke up and I’m NOT happy about it

user15: calling my therapist

user16: lindaaaa

user17: I love her energy

user18: I felt the aura from scrolls away

user19: she got cheated on a month ago and is so positive

user20: -1000 aura for getting cheated on +10000 for moving on and +10000 for moving on with ruben dias

liked by rubendias , pablogavi , duki and 612,000 others

yourusername: manchester 🩵

view comments

rubendias: pretty 😍

⇝ yourusername: ur prettier

⇝ rubendias: take the compliment

user1: she said “here damn”

user2: she skipped soft launch went straight to hard launch

user3: it can’t beeeeeeeeeeeeeee

user4: the second photo 😭😭

user5: side profile never fails to make me feel insecure

user6: said no to the revenge era and just fell in love

user7: how did she find another boyfriend in a month when I haven’t had once since I got married in kindergarten

user8: she’s so pookie

user9: ruben listening to frank ocean is all i ever wanted

pablogavi: hermosa

⇝ user10: you’re here because cecilia broke up with you when she realized you aren’t relevant anymore, I’m guessing. but hey that’s just a guess

user11: can we all roast gavi or is that disrespectful?

⇝ user12: can’t be as disrespectful as cheating on your girlfriend

user13: it’s a shame her and gavi are broken up cause she was close to his family 💔

⇝ user14: if anyone wants to complain, complain to gavi, yn had no part in him cheating whatsoever

⇝ liked by creator

user15: can I have one day where I don’t find out my favorite footballers started dating yn?

user16: aaaa how I love gossip

user17: watch cecilia propose to gavi

user18: te amo más que nada porfa cásate conmigo

@htpssgavi

[jokeroutsubs]

ENG translation: If we believed that we were "kings", that wouldn't be us

An interview with Bojan Cvjetićanin for Slovenian newspaper Delo, originally published on 24.12.2023. Audio version by IG GBoleyn123

Original article is available here for Delo subscribers. Original article written by Lucijan Zalokar for Delo; photos by Jože Suhadolnik; English translation by a member of Joker Out Subs, native proof reading by IG GBoleyn123.

If you repost quotes from the interview, please link back to this post! And if you repost the photos, do not crop out the photographer credit.

With Bojan Cvjetićanin about the international breakthrough of Joker Out, the movie Kaj pa Ester?, about life on the road, football, sociology…

I met up with Bojan Cvjetićanin in Ljubljana's Stegne industrial zone, where the members of the popular pop rock (in their jargon: shagadelic rock'n'roll) group Joker Out created a rehearsal space for themselves two years ago. "Lately we've been on the road a lot, but this is still a great second home. If only you knew about the parties that happened here. There were fifty people dancing downstairs," he proudly looked from a small gallery towards the space that measures approximately thirty square metres. Even though the clock had just struck three in the afternoon, the 24-year-old Ljubljana resident had a long day behind him, which had been entirely dedicated to media obligations.

In journalistic circles, we often hear indignation about how modern day influencers - especially those who had gained their influence on social media - have no books on their shelves. Joker Out are first and foremost musicians, of course, but with 150,000 followers (Bojan's personal profile has 190,000) on Instagram, we can count them among the big Slovenian influencers. And there are plenty of books on their shelves.

I don't want to falsely portray the popular fivesome as enlightened donors to the Slovenian literary market: most of the books resemble those you can buy for little money in second-hand bookshops, or even get for free at library write-offs, but they still deserve praise for both the aesthetic sense and the content.

I also don't want to falsely portray the books as the only notable objects in the rehearsal space. There are also the golden plate for the Eurovision single Carpe Diem, which got over two million streams in Finland, a transfusion bag (Rh-) that Tomi Meglič¹, Cvjetićanin's biggest teenage idol, personally brought to them, and a small shop's worth of props given to them by fans: pillows with hand-embroidered patterns, plushies, bras with Instagram accounts written on them, various sweets, you could even find a vinyl from a Soviet cover band of The Beatles. If things continue like that, they soon won't have any space left for instruments, but those are just sweet worries. Joker Out, who were formed in 2016, are currently conquering Europe in a way that the Slovenian music scene has never seen before.

¹frontman of Siddharta, whose third album was called Rh-

I've heard that you approach your job with the utmost professionalism and that you wake up at five in the morning for media obligations.

That's true, today we started early in the morning in Maribor. The first few hours were the most tiring because we were constantly changing locations and driving around the city. After the third or fourth activity, we relaxed a little because we got to the studio. After that, everyone started coming to us instead of the other way around.

Slovenian cinemas have started playing the movie Kaj pa Ester? in which you play a boy who enrolled in high school just to get close to his ex girlfriend again. Did you have any problems with trying to get into the high school mentality?

We filmed the movie two years ago, when my memories of high school were much more fresh than they are today. But on the other hand, I played a boy who had just finished the ninth grade of primary school, so I had to put myself into the shoes of a primary school kid, which is much harder. We're also pretty different personality-wise. But almost the entire cast was around the same age, so too old. We joked about that a lot during filming.

Still, that's nothing unusual in the movie world.

Of course, there are 35-year-olds starring in High School Musical and no one is complaining.

Could you draw any parallels between a musical stage performance and filming a movie? You have to play a kind of role during a concert too...

I have to admit that it's completely different. On stage, I never feel like I'm performing. Of course I am actually performing, but I'm still in the role of myself, Bojan, whereas in the movie, I'm someone completely different. It might be easier to compare filming a movie with recording music in the studio, but there are big differences there as well. The biggest one is that for a movie, the director has the main and the final say. You have to trust him. When you film a scene, you don't even see what you've filmed for a long time. The movie in which I play one of the main roles will be played in cinemas, and I don't even know what I will look like on the big screen. It's different with music, because us authors listen to the songs a hundred times, a thousand times; we're the ones who make all the final decisions. That's quite a mental leap, but I didn't have too many problems with it, because I knew the previous projects of that team. V dvoje ('In a tandem') is my favourite Slovenian TV series. On the other hand, I needed time to get used to this new method of working. If I asked to see the scene we'd filmed one more time, but the director said it was good, we kept filming without hesitation.

You said that on stage, you are always in the role of yourself. Does the nature of that role change from concert to concert? And what influences it? The audience, the outfit…

The outfit has an influence for sure. More than I initially thought. Lately we've been playing with our stage look a lot and looking for the right combination. I currently find that the outfit suits me very well, it's just the shoes that bother me because they're too rigid. I have to change them. They're huge and massive, which makes me feel like I'm clumsily marching around the stage, whereas during rehearsals I wear sneakers and I'm therefore a lot more in the mood for dancing.

What about the language you sing in? Many people say that they feel as if by switching between different languages, they are also switching between their personalities.

I agree. When you change the language, your voice has a different colour and register, you come up with different jokes than in your mother tongue. If I lead a concert in Slovenian, Serbian, or English, I'm a different dude every time. This is also influenced by my notion that each time, I'm performing for a different group of people who are connected by a certain mentality. In Slovenia, I'm performing as a local for locals, and I feel like there are different "game rules" than for example in Croatia or Serbia. Elsewhere, I feel like I don't even think about this.

How did you get the idea to start creating and singing in English? You already broke through internationally with Slovenian.

Us creating in foreign languages isn't so much a result of wanting to break through internationally and the mentality that only English ensures global success. If we thought that way, we wouldn't have gone to Eurovision with a Slovenian song. We're primarily driven by a desire to learn new things, to push the boundaries... In the studio, it's similar to being on the stage. If you change the language, you're not only a different person on stage, but also inside your head. Your creativity is different. Playing with languages is actually also playing with your own creativity, because you enter a different space, a different mentality. The song Sunny Side of London could not have been made if we hadn't mentally transported ourselves to an English-speaking space. We want many more projects like that, not necessarily in English.

Can you be more specific? What kind of mentality do you associate Sunny Side of London with?

That song is a sort of homage to all the people who have suddenly become part of our story. Sunny Side of London has nothing to do with London as such. I was looking for a name of a well-known place with which to name all our concerts, and I decided on London.

The first time I said the words Are you guys real? – Is this really happening, are you really here and singing our songs? – on the stage, certain English phrases snuck into my mind. What the hell is going on? and so on. We also experienced, for the first time, foreigners coming up to us and talking about their own experiences connected to our music. That was something completely new for us. We listened to all those stories in English, as our fans of course can't speak Slovenian, even though they can sing our Slovenian lyrics. Sunny Side of London therefore emerged as a collection of all the experiences and stories that fans told us after gigs.

You've already touched on fans who sing your lyrics by heart from Finland to Spain. Could you highlight the nation with the best ear for the Slovenian language?

On the latest tour, when we visited Lithuania, Poland, Czechia and Croatia, there were moments when I felt like I was singing in Slovenia. In Prague, I filmed the audience singing Umazane misli without me. As if I were in Križanke, for example. But it's even more fascinating that people sing well in England and Nordic countries too. It's understandable that our Slavic brothers have the best ear for Slovenian, but northerners aren't far off either.

How much of your international success do you attribute to the Eurovision performance?

A huge amount.

If you had to express it in a percentage?

99.9.

Really?

Definitely. It was an incredible catapult. Whenever I ask the audience at our international concerts if anyone was already with us before Eurovision, a few hands shoot up every time, but those are rare exceptions.

How do you explain the fact that you finished in the relatively humble 21st place in Liverpool, but your visibility still grew in leaps and bounds?

We were very, very, very dedicated to the Eurovision project. We put a lot of time and energy into demonstrating to the people who were open to it that we weren't just a three-minute performance, but very much an existing band that has made many songs and that lives on stage. With time, and of course in connection with the Eurovision performance, more and more listeners got to know that. We clearly showed them: we are here, we are real, try it, connect with us.

Because they had so much different content available, this actually happened. I think it was also because they saw that Joker Out really was made out of five completely regular dudes from Slovenia who live a totally normal life, and at the same time we make music and have a great time doing it. That is already a slight deviation from what's been happening recently, when we're being bombarded from all sides by messages that we need to distance ourselves from each other, that we have to hate each other...

That was the sociologist in you talking.

That's true. The atmosphere in society nowadays is such that it emphasises individuality more than building a team. Young people, however, need and want to be part of a community. And we offered them that chance.

Where does your interest in social sciences come from? Your father is a gynecologist, your mother a pediatrician, and you have a degree in sociology.

I had a very good professor in high school. If you wanted to listen to him, he offered a lot of knowledge. Even though sociologists often think about society in an abstract way, the subject always felt tangible to me. I recognised it in very concrete life situations that I was trying to understand. At my final exams, I did a great job with sociology with very little effort – and then made a mistake and enrolled in economics. I wavered between those two options from the start, and in the end, what tipped the scales were the warnings of many people I knew that sociology doesn't have good employment prospects. I gave in to the pressure and very quickly realised I had made the wrong decision. I gave up on economics after the first semester. That was when I seriously threw myself into the band, we made Gola, and then I transferred to sociology and there was happiness all around.

You clearly won't work as a sociologist for a while yet, if ever...

But I am a sociologist.

In your soul?

No, as my profession. Us musicians are sociologists. A lot of sociological terms could easily be transferred into our environment. Locale, for example. In third year, the professor asked me several times: Well, Cvjetićanin, if you have a concert, is that locale or something else? And then I said it was locale and started rambling on. (laughter)

So you are a singing sociologist?

Exactly.

How do you explain the success of Joker Out from a sociological point of view? How do your songs address the zeitgeist?

I write the lyrics exclusively based on stories that really happened. Not necessarily to me, but to people I love. Therefore, I have a strong emotional relationship with the subject matter. My opinion is that there will always be people who will connect with the story if it's real. Because it's easiest for us to connect with real emotions. Our songs are love songs, they talk about finding yourself and personal growth, some are socially critical... I think that I have managed to find the right balance between being direct and being poetic.

I'll word it differently. The Beatles already sang about love and personal growth. And they weren't the first ones by far. Later on, those same themes were covered by hundreds of successful bands and an infinite number of slightly less successful ones.

I think that nowadays, we most often associate societal changes with technological development. Technological advances largely dictate the rhythm of our life. But those advances are mostly just a substitute for something that already existed in the past. The basic emotions have therefore certainly stayed the same. Love, fear, hatred... I think that the use of language is very important here. Even though the emotions don't change, the way we put them into words does. In music, too. I don't sing about a topic the same way my peers would have in the 1970s. Consequentially, our relationship with emotions is changing and evolving as well. As if our entire society is gravitating towards the point of holding the belief that it's better for an individual to feel less and less, and in a more and more censored way.

On the one hand, excessive use of social media and other media causes us to feel like distinct individuals. On the other hand, it connects us to the world and places us into a very wide picture. In every moment, we are only a click away from becoming cosmopolitan and being able to access all the information, events, and people, but at the same time, that's exactly what reminds us that we are a small and actually not very important dot on this planet. The magnitude of everything that's constantly available to us makes us feel small. I think that we mostly listen to, watch, and use those who manage to poke the spot that unnerves people the most in this context. If performers manage to break through the firewall of someone's VPN, then those people will also show their interest in an analogue way. Otherwise, they will only be a swipe away.

And now a question that's more psychological than sociological: do you ever try to get into the heads of the people who time and again show their interest in very analogue ways?

I have an infinite appreciation for their dedication, because for myself, I don't see the chance of a phenomenon exciting me so much that I would be ready to dedicate so much time and love to it.

So you've never been a very hardcore fan?

If, at twelve years old, I had to highlight one musicians that I would've wanted to meet more than anyone in the world, that would definitely have been Tomi Meglič. That hasn't changed to this day. The only difference is that we meet up with Tomi and we're friends. I still feel the highest possible level of respect for him. Every time he calls me, I am extremely proud of myself. But I still cannot imagine going to, say, Berlin tomorrow if Siddharta were playing there and I had a free day. I'd go to Maribor or Zagreb, but absolutely not across all of Europe the way the biggest fans do. Not even at twelve. I could sooner imagine that at that age, a football match rather than a concert would be the thing that excited me beyond all reason.

We're probably talking about two groups of celebrities that get worshipped as deities by the masses in Western society: footballers and pop and rock musicians. And this is probably linked to emotions again.

True. The thing that wakes up a person's sense of smell, sight, and all other emotions that overcame them as a child, is what has the best possibility of succeeding.

Now please explain how this is connected to football.

If I go to a concert by Siddharta, Big Foot Mama, Magnifico, I turn into a ten-year-old kid who will explode from happiness. There's no Bojan anymore. He gets lost. It's the same with football. When I watch it, I dream about how I played for Slovan² as a kid and what I wanted more than anything was to score a goal and for everyone in the stands to yell: Yeeeees!

²ND Slovan is a football club from Ljubljana

You don't score goals, but you are in a similar position that Tomi Meglič used to be in.

All the band members come from very loving families that have always provided us with a very good support system and instilled basic values in us that we internalised deeply. That is why everything that's currently happening around us hasn't gone to our heads in a way that would make us think that we're bigger or more important than anyone else. If we started believing that we were "kings" because everyone was clapping for us and singing our songs, that would probably be a very strong feeling, but that simply wouldn't be us. We mostly love to see all the people, because we know how much we mean to them and how much they mean to us. Without them, we wouldn't be able to focus on what's most important to us – our music. On the other hand, I can say with a thousand percent certainty that I would easily and happily do my job if I was performing at venues like Cankarjev dom. So, in front of a calmer audience, without unreal hype.

But what I would like most in the world is to turn into a footballer for ten seconds and score a goal at an important match. You know why? Because that is the biggest adrenaline hit that exists. When we perform on various stages, there's mayhem around us for two hours straight. But in football, when a goal is scored, that happens in a millisecond. You go from nothing into total chaos. Everyone loses their minds. I'd love to experience that. Well, I did – much like everyone who played football in primary school. When I scored a goal for Slovan and a hundred people in the stands clapped for me, I felt like I was on Maracanã. Imagine what it would be like to experience that on the real Maracanã.

It's interesting that you highlighted a loving and stable family background. Many of the biggest pop and rock stars in the world grew up in a diametrally opposite environment. From John Lennon and Janis Joplin to Prince and Rihanna. There are actually so many of them that we can talk about a pattern.

I know, because I love to read their (auto)biographies, and I agree with your assessment that their family circumstances are fundamentally different than ours. That is always my answer to the question when someone wants to know how debauched our tours are. When I tell them that we mostly drink water and tea on the road, they just can't believe it. But it's the truth, because we've realised three things. First, we enjoy what we do immensely, and from the experiences of many musicians, we know that you can almost definitely forget about a long career if you start doing everything that we perceive as the proverbial rock'n'roll lifestyle. A band like that breaks up sooner or later, either because of frayed nerves, or exploding egos, or because of money. Second, we've all had to go to work hungover and we know very well that it's unbearable. I especially can't imagine how we could stay healthy and keep our strength and our voice if we were constantly hungover on the road. In that case, the only short-term solution is drugs, which we fortunately [knocks on wood] don't do. And third: I'm sure that you have a much better time on stage if you're aware that you are on it.

Your international breakthrough doesn't have a precedent among Slovenian musicians. Would you dare to point out where the difference is, why you made it and not for example Siddharta, who had filled Bežigrad stadium and later did not hide their international ambitions?

We have to understand that Siddharta didn't have the chance to perform at a festival like Eurovision. It's hard to understand what it means for 160 million people to watch you. That is a bizzarely huge number. All this happened in the time of social media, and we had set up a pretty good mechanism in that area even before Eurovision, and then also used it, whereas Siddharta established itself as a band in the time of analogue media. I can't even imagine how it would've been possible to break through abroad from Slovenia at that time. Because even we are already – even though some things have opened up for us very nicely and we've been joined by the right people – finding out how much of an investment going international demands. Dreams of megalomanical earnings and a luxurious life brought on by a European tour shatter quickly. Even when you start filling up venues, you stay in a kind of hustle mode. You fight. Unfortunately, the costs in the music business are so high that performing abroad is more or less just for promotion for a long time.

You're probably thinking of logistical costs?

Yes. Some of my colleagues have total misconceptions about our earnings. They think that we're literally swimming in money, while we actually earn what amounts to a normal salary.

In March next year you will have eighteen concerts. You will start in Helsinki and end in Milan. How will you travel?

With a tour bus. We've rented it twice so far: for the UK tour and for the tour around Lithuania, Poland, and Czechia. There are beds on it, so we can sleep while driving from one concert to the next. The tourbus is prohibitively expensive, you pay almost half of your royalties for it, but it's the only way for a musician with such a packed schedule to survive in the long run. Sometimes people ask me why we don't travel with a van instead, but you have to understand that we sometimes have concerts two days in a row and the venues are 800 kilometres apart. If we spent all night in an uncomfortable van, then looked for a hotel in the morning and so on, we might be able to endure it for a week, but definitely not all month.

Do you ever sleep in a hotel?

Only on free days.

Will the March tour be your most exhausting one so far?

It will definitely be one of the more exhausting ones, but I am definitely happy that we will be able to sleep on a tour bus. We haven't been on a month-long tour yet, so it's hard to predict anything, but on the Nordic tour this year we played six concerts in five days, because we had two concerts in one day in Helsinki. We didn't have a tour bus there, we flew instead. That meant that after the concert, we got to the hotel at midnight, then we had to be at the airport at three in the morning, a few hours later we were already at the new location, we napped for two hours on a couch, had a soundcheck – rinse and repeat for five days in a row.

Let's not talk only about the negative sides of tours…

Of course. I love sleeping on the bus! I fall asleep like a baby who's being taken for a walk in a stroller. I can't sleep more than nine or ten hours in my bed at home, on a tour bus I easily get twelve hours. Maybe it's because it's constantly shaking a little. The other guys also sleep very well on the road.

But the most magical thing on tours is when I visit a city for the first time just because we have a gig there. That seems unimaginable to me. To meet new people, wonderful fans, to bond as a band, experience new, funny situations, to bring home a bunch of new inside jokes and incredible gifts that fans have made themselves. [Points towards a hand-embroidered pillow in the part of the studio where they keep the gifts.]

Elite athletes often lament that it's true that they compete all over the world, but they often only see the airport, the hotel, and the sports venue.

It's similar for us. When we travel with a bus, we only see the venue. If we happen to have a free day, we walk around the city, but we definitely don't visit all kinds of tourist attractions as some people might wrongly imagine. When we go to Paris, we definitely won't go to the Louvre, and we will see the Eiffel tower through the bus window if everything goes well.

But you meet a lot of interesting people.

That's true. I find it the most fascinating if we meet fans when we don't expect them at all. In a restaurant, on a plane… When we were flying to Poland, it turned out that one of the flight attendants was a big fan of ours. She told us that she was going to three of our concerts and brought us champagne and a model of a Lot Polish Airlines plane.

I was even more surprised in Helsinki. I went to some kind of dark club that had a techno music party. Suddenly I was approached by three people, two guys and one girl, and they told me that they were our fans and that they couldn't believe that they met me in that club. I also couldn't believe that people recognised me in the middle of Helsinki. What's going on?!

In the summer, you took a step back from Instagram for a while. What brought you to that decision?

Many things. I felt creatively empty. I also, for the first time in my life, experienced the internet – not just Slovenian, but global – being completely oversaturated with me. That started negatively pressuring me and eating me up. I thought about it a lot, and the first time I asked myself whether I'd be less Bojan Cvjetićanin if I didn't have an Instagram profile, I turned it off. Immediately after that, I wrote three songs; I felt as if I had cleaned up some of the mess that had built up recently. I returned to social media some time ago; with much healthier habits than before, I think.

How do you see social media? As a space for playfulness, for promotion, part of the job, part of private life?

I think that at the time when they started killing me, I perceived them too professionally. I had a feeling that Instagram was a platform through which I had to achieve all sorts of things. Lately, I prefer to joke around more.

If you repost quotes from the interview, please link back to this post! And if you repost the photos, do not crop out the photographer credit.

[zegrasdrysdale]

Hi! I wanted to ask if you could write a request for cole caufield! So him and reader are like newly public but have been dating for a couple months, but she’s getting hate on the internet bc her ex is someone who’s famous (idk who lol) but anyways she goes onto like a podcast and talks about how much better of a boyfriend cole was to her than her ex and when she gets home he’s just so in awe of her and the way she feels and speaks about him (I’m so sorry if this didn’t make sense) 😭

[ to love and to be loved ] c. caufield

paring : Cole Caufield x influencer!fem!reader

summary : tired of the hate she's been getting, (Y/N) goes on a podcast to talk about her life, her past relationship, and her new public relationship with Canadians star Cole Caufield

warning(s) : language, mentions of cheating

author’s note : my first time ever writing for cole so pls tell me if i did okay :)

༺═──────────────═༻

She didn't know what she thought would happen when she and Cole went public with their relationship a few months after they started dating. There were a few hours where all she saw was support, until her TikToker ex decided to say something about the announcement she and Cole made.

All she sees right now is hate from thousands of people after her ex's comments on his Instagram story. He called her a bitch and said she used him to gain fame and use his money to get what she wanted. He even tagged Cole in a second Instagram story to warn him about her "manipulative ways". His millions of fans agreed with him and have started to flood her feed with hate and negative messages.

She can't even imagine what Cole's comments and DMs look like.

It's been a week since that day, and she's only grown tired of seeing all the hate. She's hasn't spoken out about her ex's accusations about her despite her having more serious accusations about him and his own girlfriend.

As soon as she was invited to go on one of her friends' podcasts, she jumped at the opportunity to speak out about what's been going on. It's time to speak out, and that's the reason her friend invited her on to the podcast.

The set is comfortable. She sits on the couch next to her friend and her friend's podcast partner. A microphone sits in front of her on a stand. A table sits at her feet that holds cups of coffee for the three of them. It's a cozy set up.

"Thank you for inviting me," (Y/N) says to her friend. "I'm sorry Cole wasn't available to come on with me. He flew in this morning from his road trip and has practice today. He didn't want to risk being late to the rink."

Her friend Demi says, "It's not a problem. I understand that he has a busy schedule. Thank you for agreeing to come on."

"It's time I spoke up about this," she tells her friend. "Don't be afraid to ask the hard questions. I'll happily answer any of them."

One of the crew members tells them they're going live in less than a minute. (Y/N) throws her curls behind her shoulder and sits back to get comfortable on the couch.

The same crew member counts down from five before pointing at Demi and her podcast partner. Demi is the one that gives this episode's greeting.

"Welcome back to TikTok Stuff You Should Know," she says into her own microphone. "To my left is Payton, which is not surprising at all because she's glued to my side. Today we have a very special guest joining us. She is a very close friend of mine who has been dealing with a lot of hate recently after launching her relationship online last week. Please welcome (Y/N) (L/N) to the podcast."

Payton looks over at (Y/N) and speaks. "Welcome, (Y/N). We're very happy you're able to join us today."

"Happy to be here."

Demi smiles at her and says, "So, we're all dying to know. How is your relationship with Cole Caufield? How have the two of you been dealing with the past week?"

There it is. Starting out strong.

"Cole has been super supportive of me," she replies. "He's been doing his best in trying to distract me over the past week. I think we've both been trying to stay off social media this week and focus on making sure we're both okay. He's been playing really well recently too, which makes it very easy to distract myself from everything that's been happening on social media. I think he's been using hockey as his own distraction."

Payton nods along as (Y/N) speaks. Demi's eyes are on her. They're both listening to everything she's been saying.

That's only a fraction of what's been happening.

(Y/N) has been in tears almost every night, especially since Cole has been on a roadie for the past four days. The first three days after all hell broke loose were perfect. She laid in Cole's arms every night and woke up next to him every morning. It made the days a lot easier.

Since he left, she's been in tears on FaceTime with him. It hasn't been as easy without him near her. It actually kind of sucks. She didn't even get to see him before she left.

"What made you want to come out about your seemingly new relationship with him?" Payton asks. "Did you think that Ethan would say something about it when you and Cole posted about it?"

She shakes her head. "I always thought Ethan was a really nice guy," she explains. "I certainly didn't expect this out of him. Especially after everything he did throughout our relationship. Cole and I really love each other and we both got tired of hiding that from the public. It was his idea to make out "

"That's an interesting comment," Demi slowly says like she doesn't know what her ex did. "What did Ethan do during your relationship?"

(Y/N) bites her bottom lip for a second. "He cheated on me," she tells the two of them. "All the time at the end of our relationship. Actually, his new girlfriend is just one of the girls he fucked while we were in a relationship. He would have a new girl every weekend and I would look the other way because I loved him."

"It wasn't because you didn't want to lose your constant source of followers and money?" Payton asks. "I'm not taking a shot, by the way. He accused you of using him for fame and money so I just want you to be able to clear the air."

"No, I understand," she replies after being caught off guard by the way the question was worded. "Um, no. I never once used him for followers or money. I made my own money by posting my own content across social media. I stayed with him because I wanted to believe he was a better person and that he could change. I truly loved him and I wanted a future with him. After nearly three months of this, I couldn't do it anymore and I ended things with him."

She notes that Payton looks genuinely surprised by her words. Demi looks annoyed because she and (Y/N) are actually very close friends so she was one of the first people that she told what was going on. She was one of the people that told (Y/N) to end the relationship when Ethan started cheating on her.

"That's crazy," Payton drawls. "Holy shit." She looks over at Demi. "Did you know about all of this?"

"(Y/N) is one of the most genuine people I have ever known," Demi says. "I hated seeing her in that relationship at the end, and I hate that she's being accused of using someone for followers and money. There was a reason she rarely ever posted Ethan on any of her social media. She didn't want to constantly post him because she was afraid to be labeled as a user. She loves creating content and videos. She's so much happier now."

A small smile forms on her lips as she thinks about Cole. She thinks about how he actually loves her and isn't afraid to show it.

"I am so much happier now," she echoes. "I mean, Cole is the best thing that has ever happened to me. He was so patient with me at the beginning of our relationship because I was still healing from my last relationship. He spent so long trying to show me that it's okay to love and be loved by someone that I gave my heart to him. I trust him with my everything, which is not something I would've said this time last year."

Demi smiles at her and Payton mirrors it. "That's so good to hear," Payton says. "Sounds like you caught a good one, (Y/N)."

"I absolutely did," she replies with a smile on her own face. "He is the best boyfriend. I've been so emotional this past week and he has made sure to be there for me the entire time. He checked in on me while he was on the road for the past few games. I am so in love with him, and he helped me believe in love again. I am so grateful for him."

One of the crew members tells them to begin wrapping up. Payton takes over. "Well, thank you for talking with us, (Y/N)," she says. "Where can we find you and Cole?"

"You can find Cole on the ice tomorrow night at seven when he and the Canadians take on the Calgary Flames," she says. "You can find him on social media at colecaufield. You can find me on social media as well at yourusername. Or you can find me somewhere in the stands at Cole's home hockey games."

༺═──────────────═༻

It feels like an eternity since she's been home when she walks into her apartment in downtown Montreal. She shuts the door behind her with a sigh and leans against it.

When she throws her keys in the bowl by the door, she sees Cole's car keys. "Coley?" she calls. "Are you here?"

She walks into the living room to see Cole sitting on the couch. He looks back at her and smiles. "You are freaking amazing, baby," he tells her. "I listened to the podcast on the way home and holy shit. I have never heard anyone talk about me the way you do. I swear I fall in love with you more every single day."

"You listened?" she asks.

Cole stands up with a nod. "To the whole thing," he replies. "I helped you believe in love again?"

"Yeah," (Y/N) breathes out. "You did. You showed me that it's okay to love someone without being afraid they're going to hurt you. I thought that for a long time, Cole. You helped me realize that it's okay to love someone again."

Without realizing it, tears begin to roll down her cheeks. She tries to wipe them away quickly but Cole notices them before she can wipe them away. He walks around the couch to get to her and he envelopes him in a hug. "I'm so proud of you, baby," he whispers in her ear.

She lets out a quiet sob and buries her face in his chest. "I'm so grateful for you," she replies.

"You're so brave for talking about the whole situation," Cole tells her. "I can't believe how well you're handling it. I'm in awe, (Y/N). I wish I had your strength. I wish I could've been there to witness the whole podcast."

"I'm only brave because you're here," she admits as she pulls her face out of his chest. Cole moves his hands to her jaw and his thumbs wipe away more tears that escaped. "I don't know where I'd be if you weren't here. I don't know if I'd even be here if you weren't, Cole."

Cole presses a kiss to her forehead and mumbles, "I love you. More than you'll ever know. You're so strong."

She closes her eyes and whispers, "I love you too."

(Y/N) isn't afraid to say those three words anymore. Not like she was last year. Cole has showed her that she doesn't need to be afraid anymore.

༺═──────────────═༻

MASTERLIST

have a request ? check out the guidelines !

[heystephen]

wait im so curious whats happening rn w liam payne? he was always default the worst 1d guy and ik he like shills nfts but i need the tea on what he did to get twitter to snap

it’s been a wild 24 hours in 1Dville so let me summarize everything the best i can

the beginning of this debacle was that liam flew out to niall’s show in argentina and just really made a spectacle of himself. this drew comparisons to other times the boys (excluding liam) have gone to support each other and been sure to avoid stealing the spotlight from the other one, specifically a time that harry went to see niall as well and left when he realized fans were watching him and not niall on stage. he also made some weird comments on snapchat about him and niall having things to ‘clear up’ which was probably just him trying to stir up drama and attention.. it’s worth noting that liam himself has specifically said that niall has told him more than once to stop talking about him. anyway after the show, liam went to nialls hotel to stand outside and meet NIALLS fans and take pictures with them. this entire thing just put a bad taste in a lot of people’s mouths but as far as criticisms liam’s getting right now, this is very tip of the iceberg. like weird but not necessarily bad

THEN we are brought back to when he went on logan paul’s podcast a few years ago and mentioned having a fight with a member of 1D who threw him into a wall. he didn’t say who it was and there was a lot of speculation as to which member it was. his ex girlfriend, maya henry, confirmed via tiktok that it was zayn and joked that she has heard the story an insufferable amount of times. his fans essentially jumped her in the comments and she hit back at them saying that they didn’t know him in the same context that she did as his ex. she has a book out where she talks about the abuse she endured with him, and in her tiktok she talked about how the day she released her book, liam went to see louis in concert for damage control because he knew that two 1D members in the same room always gets attention. she also mentioned that he still stalks her, and still calls her, her mom, her grandmother, her friends, and frequently creates new icloud accounts to harass her. there’s a lot more that can be said for his treatment of maya and the specific things she went through but i think the fact that she says he would openly tell her that he can do anything he wants because one direction fans will defend him says it all..

a fan came forward via tiktok as well and shared that she had been coerced and manipulated into sharing nudes with him through instagram. while she was of legal age, the power imbalance between a fan and a celebrity cannot be overlooked. she was also told by liam that he can get away with anything because he has 1D fans. maya confirmed in the comment section that other women have told her that he did this to them as well.

do with all of this as you will and form your opinion about him and his actions as you will! personally, i find him not just skeezy and weird, but abusive and highly resentful of the success of his former band mates because he knows he will never be remembered as an integral member of one direction and formidable solo artist the way the others are 🫡

[blamemma]

miss blamemma, please could you detail what you think happened between michael and daniel for the rest of us that are obsessed with the drama?!

i truly wish i could just upload the voicenotes i've sent to the besties today about this because that would be SO much easier but ok here we go....

i don't think there is one cataclysmic event that led them to fall out, i think it's an amalgamation of a couple of things.

privacy and money; michael loves popularity, loves money, loves business, loves social media, montesises his drivers (he's doing that now with his reels of yuki as well). there has to come a point, for me, where that crosses the boundaries of your role as a trainer. as a trainer, you have to be there for your driver, your driver is your number one priority. if that driver no longer feels they can trust you, then you are not doing your job. michael going on multiple podcasts and dropping tidbits about daniel's life and training and difficulties here and there is not a good look, and i think of the most telling is that testosterone article. michael worked with daniel for the last 5 years so people are going to presume that it is about daniel and on the back of that i saw multiple articles that were headlined something along the fucked up lines of "daniel ricciardo's trainer reveals he broke sex ban with hot young girlfriend heidi berger" (here & here and there are definitely more examples!) and daniel is a relatively private guy about his relationship so having that blasted everywhere cause ur ex-trainer talked about male hormones?? and then yeah u have that podcast thing today....

i have no proof, but i truly believe that michael wanted daniel to take the haas or williams seat so that he (michael) could stay in f1 because again, being in this prestigious sports gets him followers and engagement = money. therefore, when daniel went to him for advice michael may not have been open and willing to daniel's idea of a sabbatical, because it didn't really mean employment for michael (to caveat here, not having job security is a very daunting thing, and i am not saying michael is wrong for worrying about this, however, michael is paid and contracted by daniel and i dont think daniel would have been paying him a cheap wage these past 5 years)

i think daniel has had the time to step away from mclaren, process what happened there, enter red bull again and see how they manage their drivers, move to alpha tauri and see how they manage and speak about their drivers and then truly assess and process the year that last year was. whether you believe michael was foundational in daniel's issues last year or not, he was in control of his diet and exercise regime and his general health and we can all clearly see that deteriorated over the mclaren period and it may be daniel has now stepped away, assessed, talked to some fellow drivers like max (who then stuck up for him in that press conference when michael was brought up, hence why i think he spoke to max about) and how they get on with their trainers and thought hmmmm michael wasn't like that

other factors include michael being very close and friendly with mclaren engineers and social media people (again, valid, you want to get on with the people you work with, but again, your priority should be daniel especially in a tumultuous team like that!) & michael constantly saying he wanted to bigger than daniel, even to the point he started training his neck so that he could say he had a bigger neck than daniel....weird behaviour when you're meant to be motivating ur driver, not ultimately trying to beat them when they're already down in the dumps???

this is genuinely all conjecture and theories and i have no evidence for any of the shit i am spouting here but i am just going on the info we have and the things we have seen and trying to connect dots....

[cee-grice]

WIP INTRO - NOTE TO SELF: MURDER COMPLICATES THINGS

(working title lol)

GENRE - romcom x murder mystery

STATUS - first draft

PITCH -

If you'd told Adrian joining a chess club in his freshman year of university would lead to him getting roped into solving the murder of his crush's ex, he probably would have believed you, because nothing would delight the gods more than making his life into a proper joke. He didn't even like chess.

THEMES/FEATURING - lgbtq+, autism rep, best friends to ???, humorous narration, dealing with grief, unrequited (?) love, complicated family dynamics, self-discovery (and self-denial), love expressed through domesticity

SYNOPSIS -

When Adrian first enrolled in university, he had a plan to drop out three months in. Enter Cillian, and there went the plan. Was it a little pathetic all it took was a single charming boy to smile his way for him to fold? No. It was a lot pathetic. Cillian was everything Adrian was not - smart, most obviously. Terribly unfunny (which almost circled back to being funny). Reserved, but weirdly unrestrained. And so completely unaware of his effect on people (Adrian) that it was genuinely painful at times. Ah, and of course - extraordinarily private. Now, Adrian had no problem with that. Or, he hadn't, until Cecile, Cillian's girlfriend, showed up on their apartment's doorstep. Well, that's one way to get fucking friend-zoned. Life went on, Adrian convinced himself he was completely and entirely fine with being just friends, and all was well until-- Until Cillian and Cecile broke up. Until, days later, she went hiking and fell. Death always seems so far away until it's not, and although Adrian is as unprepared to be the emotional support as a door might be, he's nothing if not determined to give it his best shot. Only, he quickly finds out Cillian needs a whole different kind of support. He's convinced Cecile's death wasn't an accident and is set on finding the (potentially non-existent) culprit. And although Adrian is less prepared to be a detective than a fucking door, he's nothing if not absurdly devoted to his completely casual best friend and all his needs.

EXCERPT -

“Vera she first met online,” Cillian said, tapping on the first girl’s, a pretty blonde's, picture. “And Eline is her podcast’s co-host, and she… uh… I don’t remember,” he murmured, and his face twisted with a sudden dismay. “How can I not remember that?” “I barely remember where I met my own friends,” Adrian rushed to say. He opted to not comment on Cillian’s use of the present tense there. “It definitely doesn’t matter here, anyway. She had a podcast, you said?” “Yes,” Cillian said slowly, as if his voice struggled against him. He swallowed. “About true crime. She was… quite passionate about it.” “Oh, huh. She probably would’ve loved all this, then,” Adrian said with a vague gesture at the wall, and, as it’d become too common lately, immediately regretted speaking. Instead of snapping at him, however, Cillian let out a choked sort of laugh. “Oh, yes.” He rested his forehead against the wall, closing his eyes. He breathed, once, twice, until it caught in his throat. “She would never forgive me if I didn’t solve her own case.” When he looked at Adrian, such rawness and desperation swam in his eyes it momentarily paralyzed Adrian. “Do you understand?” Yeah. He thought he did. And the realization only invited forth a whole new wave of dread. Cillian wouldn’t just give up. He wouldn’t just grieve through it, until the ache receded enough for him to think clearly again. To be himself again. He wouldn’t let go until he figured this puzzle out. But if the puzzle didn’t have an answer…

Notes: this is so entirely different from the rest of my works lol. I'm a fantasy girlie, that's what I'm most comfortable with, and yet, this idea has rotted through my brain, and thus I must entertain it. sometimes, you need to give your brain a break from all the worldbuilding and politics, and just write about something domestic (or, as domestic as solving a potential murder can be lol). I haven't ever written a story with the purpose of exploring my own experiences, so that's also new for me x)) anyway, I'm unsure where this will take me still, but ya know. it's the journey that matters anyway:D

if we're still doing taglists, I may make one if someone wanted to be on it lol

[99pansy]

Can you explain Eliza Cuts lore, please? I know she was apparently very unwell and creepy (?). Ive been an MCR fan since 2014 but never knew much about her other than she was a weirdo--probably was much more common knowledge back in the late 00's.

hii sorry im so late to these I was gna answer yesterday but I hurt my back like the old lady I am

i can give you a rundown and also some links to look at so you can do your own research <3 I like to provide a mostly unbiased opinion cos I don't like telling people what to think or whatever. any links I post will also be included at the bottom

eliza cuts background

eliza cuts (legal name eliza siep, also known as eliza bleu in recent year) is the ex-fiance of gerard

eliza was a hairdresser for many different bands in the scene, and apparently was a longtime fan of mcr. after meeting gerard at the merch table after shows a few times, they exchanged contact information and she managed to cut his hair as well.

one thing led to another, and eliza ended up joining the band on tour as a makeup and hair stylist.

gerard had JUST ended things with his then longtime girlfriend kat (apparently 2 days before), and there are some unsubstantiated rumors there was some overlap in these relationships

many fans believe she inserted/forced herself into gerard's life. I'm not sure what to think about this. I will say gerard is/was a grown adult and he can make his own choices. it takes two people to start a relationship. i also believe eliza suffered from mental illness, which would describe some of her erratic behavior.

anyway, she quickly becomes a polarizing figure in the fandom and eventually, everyone figures out she and gerard are dating. they become engaged on may 22, 2007

obviously they would never get married because gerard and lindsey got married just 4 months later on sept 3, 2007

frank's post about eliza

it is highly speculated that frank made this post about eliza after he became fed up with her behavior. i won't paste the whole thing here since its sorta long. i go over this more in my ss/mayo post if you haven't read it.

world's most hated crew

fans gave eliza's group of friends the nickname "world's most hated crew" because of how disgraced they apparently were at the time. this group also included heychris and alicia simmons/way.

they decided to reclaim this title and made a website which was intended to feature q+a, journals, and message boards for fans

eliza's fanfiction

eliza wrote some fanfic that is totally not about mcr as the main characters are named "emma" and "paul" and the band featured is called "the black pajama party"

this fanfic was pretty crazy for a few reasons. she implies she was abused by gerard and that he cheated on her with kat (his ex)

eliza's fake accounts

after gerard left eliza, she began spreading private info about mcr using burner accounts according to this comment:

pregnancy rumor

i'll just answer this ask here--

according to this comment, the rumor about Gerard having paid for eliza to have an abortion is false. she says she was never pregnant in this interview:

i'm not sure why she would lie about something so serious.

where is eliza today?

eliza has done a few podcasts since 2021. in her most recent one, she discusses her alleged experiences as a victim of sex trafficking. she did this interview in 2019 (same one from before). this page attempts to debunk this claim. I'm not sure what to think. she does have a history of telling lies... I don't like to discredit victims though.

click for sauces

blog on the full eliza story (2023)

reddit post about eliza (2022)

unbiased post about eliza (2009)

eliza's fanfic (2008)

frank's post about eliza on imnotokay.net (2007)

interview with eliza (2019)

world's most hated crew (archive 2007)

youtube video (2023, haven't watched this one tbh lmk if I should)

eliza's IMDB

[vintageaustin]

lotta true crime part 4

pairing: serial killer Austin x reader

summary: serial killer Austin kidnaps reader who has a podcast about true crime with her friends cus she saw something she shouldn't

trigger warnings: mentions of murder and well death kidnapping Stockholm syndrome.. mentions of various serial killers talk of blood and knifes psychotic thinking... and smut in the next chapters last but not least my shitty writing

authors note: sorry it took so long to write art 4 i kept re writing it. might be a part 5,6

special tag: @asshlyyyy

*couple of years earlier *

“I might…” Austin said as he took another swing of his drink. “I might kill my ex…” he laughed as he looked at his best friend.

“Not the best idea….  Her new boyfriends next.” He said and stared daggers at his so called best friend Jordan, but Jordan should’ve known better he should’ve know better then fuck Austin’s girlfriend.

Did he really love her no? Did that matter no. It wasn’t a if I can’t have her no one will kind of case, but tsk he thought Jordan knew better then touch what’s his 

*present time*

Now how did he get here…in downtown Los Angeles.

He slit the girls neck, but little did he know he was getting sloppy sure he wore gloves but there was a witness .. and he dropped the knife.

Little did he know that person saw his face. Maybe not clearly but certain details they’ll remember 

*pov switch* 

Meanwhile It’s been a couple of months since Austin kidnapped you.

Your friends and family have been looking for you every night and day, while you were happily playing house with your serial killer boyfriend. And the worst part was it didn’t even bother you one bit.

You were happy and sure Austin wasn’t perfect but who was you were blinded by love. And you weren’t exactly perfect either. You cleaned the stains out of his blood stained clothes and made him dinner.

If you were being honest Austin was insane and you handled it beautifully. You never saw yourself as a house wife at all you hated when people wanted that 1950s shit they asked from you.

But here you were willing to be a bride love really did make blind and you’d be damned if you’d let it slip by. 

When Austin came home from work you were laying on the couch as you scrolled though Netflix. Watching that new Dahmer show, because at the end of the day you were still a true crime student taking online courses. 

He smiled softly as he put his keys down after he  locked the door back up. He walked over to the couch and bend down kissing you. “Hi” he said in between the kiss “baby”. You smiled softly and kissed back holding his cheek. “Hm hi how was work?” You asked and sat up a bit.

Austin sat down on the couch and put your legs on his lap. He let out a dry chuckle and started kissing up your neck. “Chilled a bit” he mumbled. Getting closer and closer to your ear “killed a bit” he whispered in your ear. And started to tickle you.

You laughed softly, this man had all of you, he owned you and he…. He would be lost without you. It’s crazy really how fast two people can fall in love, how fast they can bond over being insane… and then end up insanely in love with one another. You remember your friends, they were talking about you on the podcast it was kinda sad. A part of you felt guilty but then again they never treated you good did they. At the end of the day you knew that in a few months they wouldn’t even notice you were gone.

You got snapped out of your thoughts. As the door bell ring you looked over at Austin and he frowned as he checked the camera on his phone. “Cops…?” He mumbled to himself as he looked at you. “Listen honey I want you to go hide in room underneath our bed okay?” He said and cupped your face kissing you.

After the kiss you ran off and hid underneath your bed. Austin on the other hand went out to the door and opened it. “Good afternoon officer,how can I help you today?” He asked ever do polite. “ good afternoon mr butler just wondering why you got all these… bars up your window and doors…?” The police officer asked suspicious.

Austin chuckles and  let out a small sigh “yeah well officer I do live in a nasty neighborhood rather be safe then sorry” he said and rubbed the back of his neck. 

The officer nodded and scanned all over him still suspicious. “What happened to your hand..? If I may ask” the officer asked and looked at the bandage around his hand. “Oh I burned it while taking something out of the oven.” Austin said and looked down at his hand.

The Other officer nodded and spoke up. “You haven’t heard anything about the murders in the neighborhood have you, the missing girl?” He said as he showed him a. Picture of you, Austin looked at the picture and shook his head “no sir sorry I haven’t seen her around” was all he said. The officer nodded and spoke up for the last time “just uh stay in town we might have some more questions, if you see anything call us” he said before walking of.

Austin nodded and closed the door “good day officer”. He said and waited for them to to get in their car and drive of as soon as they did. He kicked the door “FUCK”. He said and rubbed his face you came running out of the room and looked at him.

“What’s happening ..?” You asked nervous. Austin walked over and wrapped his arms around your waist. 

“Well baby better start packing, we’re going to Vegas “

love, jessica

[bharv]

I don’t know if you’re still playing the public ask game but I have to know:

Who ARE you? Like, I don’t need a name, but you’re always alluding to this ‘rubbing shoulders with Hollywood’ past. What did you do? Who did you meet? And why stop?

Who AM I lmao cool ask anon honestly I am nobody.

I just trained in theatre and went to a prestigious drama school. I stopped working in theatre way back in 2014 full time, and I now only dabble in a few select projects. I stopped because I developed a limiting disability which means I don’t have the energy levels required for the gruelling level of work needed to make a living in that sector.

And like. I didn’t know famous people back then particularly! It’s a cliche but it’s true that you just never know who is going to make it in your peers. There were people I just met at some parties who had an idea that went on to become one of the most successful narrative podcasts of all time, and another who was a fellow “girlfriend of a comedian” who made another insanely popular podcast, another struggling writer who went on to show run a marvel show.

I also dated. A lot. In London lmao and if you’re arty dating arty and you’re queer you tend to stay pals with your exes or failed dates on the whole.

It’s a relatively small world and eventually when you get old enough some of your peers will make it! There were only 700 people at my drama school when I was there across all undergrad and masters students, you get to know most of them, and odds are some are gonna make it big!

Equally there are people who are wildly talented who didn’t. And that’s just how the industry is sadly. One of the famous people I know definitely doesn’t deserve his fame…

[scarisd3ad]

Superstar | football player!Joel Miller x popstar!Reader

Prologue - you belong with me

>> next

Masterlist

Taglist

Warnings - cursing, fake dating? Age gap based off of Taylor swift and Travis Kelce kinda hard launching their relationship last night, Joel has his both his daughters but they are way younger in this (Sarah being 9, and Ellie being 5), Joel is 37 and reader is 26, no outbreak au, and modern au (its around 2022 or 2023)

Summary - when you find out about a certain football player showing up at your tour you decide to reach out just because of all the dating rumors, but what if thoughs rumors turn into reality?

‘Can’t you see? You belong with me’

I let out a sigh as I throw myself onto my couch. I've been spending the last 3 months touring around the US and to say I was tired was an understatement. I pull my phone out of my pocket and begin scrolling through Instagram. my cat ollie hops up in my lap chirping in delight and rubbing his face against my arm. "Hi ollie" I coo as I drag my hand down his head and back. "Hi handsome how are you baby?" I coo as he curls up on my lap.

bringggg bringgg bringgg.

my phone that I had discarded next to me begins to vibrate and display a picture of my best friend Kailey. I pick it up and answer the call. "Yes?" she begins to talk "didyouknowthatjoelfuckingmillerwasatyourconcertlastnight?!!!" my brows furrow in confusion "k I did not understand a word you just said" she lets out an annoyed sigh "Joel miller the football player was at your concert last night" my brows stay in their contorted state because why the fuck would I care? a lot of celebrity's come to my concerts. "Okay?"

"Ugh y/n he said on some podcast that he wanted to give you his number" Joel miller was a name I've heard before, he was a popular football player one that all girl fawn over. "But he couldn't because you weren't doing a meet and greet" I have a feeling that this was all for some type of pr, to get in articles and shit. I've had an influx of popularity recently and a lot of men have claimed they went out with me or hooked up with me just for attention. "Do you really think he's telling the truth?" I can almost hear her eyeroll through the phone. "Just maybe you should dm him. maybe it will be good for you y'know after what happened with Andy." Andrew or Andy was my boyfriend, well now ex-boyfriend. we broke up after almost 6 years together, it was heart breaking to not only me but my fans too. I just haven't been up to date since because I thought he was it for me. "Okay, okay maybe alright?"

once we hang up, I go on twitter to see that Joel miller is trending. I push on the hashtag to see millions of screen recordings of the podcast. it's a podcast that he has with his brother tommy miller who also happens to be a football player. "So, I heard you went to y/n's tour" tommy says with a tiny smirk on his lips. "Yeah, I wanted to give her a bracelet with my number on it, but I couldn't" Joel says with a chuckle, tommy raises his brows "your jersey number or your number?"

"You know which one."

he was cute, I can't deny that he has dark brown hair and dark brown eyes, just my type, but I think he's a little too old for me. I'm 26 he's 37 I think he'd get a bunch of hate online if we got together, right? maybe I should dm him, even if it didn't end up in a relationship I could end up with a cool new friend. I type his name into Instagram and push on the first verified account I see. the account is really just full of pictures with his daughters, his brother, and teammates. no girlfriend in sight. I push on the message button and begin to type.

'Hey, saw the podcast. thought we could may-' no too straight forward. 'Hey, wanna go out?' I decide to settle on just 'hey' because everything else I typed felt cringy.

joelmilleroffical

Me - hey

I let out a sigh as I drop my phone beside me and lean my head back against the couch cushions. "mreow" I look down to see ollies eyes wide open as he looks up at me. I place my hand on his head and begin to pet him.

ping

ollie begins to purr as I pick up my phone. it's a notification from Instagram. I push on it, and it takes me to Joels chat. butterfly's form in my stomach, I shouldn't feel this excited right? I don't even know if he was serious about wanting to give me his number.

joelmillerofficial

Me - hey! - 12:30pm

Joelmillerofficial - holy shit hey

Me - saw your podcast lol...was wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime?

Joelmillerofficial- yeah, yeah that sounds cool whenever you're up for it lol.

Me - how bout tomorrow? you could come over swim in my pool. you can bring your kids if you want

Joelmillerofficial - sure I have to see if my mom can watch my girls.

the conversation is a little awkward, I just hoped that it wouldn't be like that in real life. I don't really expect anything from this I still don't think I'm really ready to date, Andy and I broke up 3 months ago. I think it's alright for me to be single for a while after a 6-year long relationship. the press was just starting to think that Andy proposed 2 months before the breakup, I was already thinking about rings, so was Andy's mom. the breakup was a total surprise, I didn't expect it, nobody did. I thought he was in love with me, he was nothing but loving towards me. yeah, he didn't like to call attention to our relationship, or talk about me in interviews, or post me but I just thought he want our relationship to be private, he didn't want everyone to know about every aspect of our relationship. maybe I deserved a man who would scream at the top of his lungs that I was his girl.

ping.

joelmillerofficial

Joelmillerofficial - my oldest want to come with me but my mom will watch my youngest.

Joelmillerofficial- what time should I come over?

Me - is 1 alright for you?

Joelmillerofficial- yup

I've never even met this man in real life and him and his oldest daughter are coming over to my house tomorrow. this is good branching out most of my friends are people in the same industry as me or people I met during childhood so meeting someone who has nothing to do with the music industry is cool. I know nothing about the NFL, and he knows nothing about the music industry, a match made in heaven. twitter is blowing up about Joel, every other TikTok or tweet is 'Joel x y/n???' or 'do you think they'll be the new it couple?'. whenever a new man enters my life it's like this, even if the guy is just a friend every article is speculating if we're dating or hooking up. I decide not to tell Kailey because I don't want her to freak out until something is official. knowing her she'd insist on being here, and then embarrass the fuck out of me. this is just going to be a cool getting to know each other thing that'll probably just end up in a friendship.

Taglist

@taylarxse @none-of-this-makes-any-sense @ktheunready @camixkami @skysmiller @mars743 @romeestrvjds @lightxzhan @alyhull @jenna-mcgraw19 @rainyblizzardgiver

[spaceorphan18]

I have to be honest. I don't like the podcast but it's also very easy to say "you don't like what they say, don't listen to it" Truth is, it's the only podcast for Glee that is done by someone who was in the cast and as I'm only human, I do hope every time that I can hear something akin to what I expect from an official podcast. Also, the frustration comes from one thing you said and that I see happening. They might be not aware of it but by glossing over (this message is going to be split)

some things they are in fact giving certain pairings/characters haters a reason to hate. And they polarize the opinion of the audience, ex, the winner for the contest of the best episode in S2 was, what a coincidence, the episode that Kevin said it was his favourite. Why? Because he said it was his favourite. This is not how it's supposed to be. And since I'm never going there to write them about it the only thing I can do is getting upset on my own hoping to see something change. P.S. Personal opinion take it by what it is, although I never bashed her, I do think Santana was a lot of times a terrible person. In no way someone should be allowed to be so mean to other people (hello?S6 speech to Kurt). She has been terrible from S1 with every possible character, including Brittany when she went to school with her new girlfriend and kissed her after her performance. Naya was amazing in portraying her but Santana bullied a lot of people and was def not an example of goodness.

Hi Nonny! Phew, a lot of things going on here. First of all, though, thank you for being polite in my in box. In general, don't bring wank into my in box because I will go off on you (or delete it). Also, I've had sleep now, so I'm in a much better mind set. You guys get me before bed and I will not be as eloquent.

***

I do hear your guys' frustrations. I do. And it's not like I'm not disappointed, too. I keep going back to The Office Ladies and Pod Meets World podcasts -- where the hosts do a thorough recap and break all the things down. It leads to a very satisfying listening experience. And PMW specifically - the cast breaks down what it was like to be a child actor and the ups and downs of that -- which is honest but really, really open. The thing is, too, they're aware of their audience and how it effects them.

One key difference though -- is while no set is perfect, the experience on The Office and Boy Meets World was, on a whole, much more positive than the set of Glee. The Glee set was a hot mess -- not only were working conditions incredibly rough, but it was run by an egomaniac who didn't know how to handle a bunch of early 20-somethings and things got out of hand. Not to mention - there are three young deaths that tie into the show that does make it more complicated to talk about.

So, while I do think it's a disappointment that Kevin and Jenna are not more (maybe for a lack of better word) professional in how they're coming at this podcast -- I also don't fault them for having a hard time with things because I'm pretty sure there are a lot of hard memories that go along with it. (I'm still unsure, more so Jenna than Kevin, wanted to do the podcast -- but it is what it is I suppose.)

I think it is completely valid to have those frustrations -- especially when there isn't anywhere to direct it. Believe me - when they did Born This Way and did not even mention that Kurt sang As If We Never Said Goodbye -- his best solo and one of his climaxes of his Seasons 1 and 2 stories, it was incredibly frustrating.

But I think downward spiraling (as others have done) into conspiracies and accusations isn't the right way to go. Kevin and Jenna have heard us - and their response is to be mostly indifference about it. Unfortunately, I don't see them planning to change, so I feel like expectations should be adjusted accordingly.

Though - I do think there are polite ways to reach out. Sending an email to their podcast that is kind and explanatory is fine. Screaming that they hate Darren in their mentions is not.

***

I want to highlight one thing you said -- about their influence on things...

As I said before, it is unfortunate that anyone is using Kevin and Jenna's opinions to trash on other fans. That is not cool, and while I really hasn't seen much of it (that is directed from what they say on the podcast and not what people were doing in the first place) I think there's a difference between people being asshats and people being influenced to vote for a fav episode based on what Kevin thinks.

If being in fandom this long -- and if being in sales and selling things to people for so long -- one thing I've learned is that the power of suggestion is a real thing that happens. People are going to go, a lot of times, with group mentality. This person thinks its cool? Okay, I gotta think its cool, too.

I don't expect an audience -- especially the majority of people who are not like me and don't do media analysis on the show -- to really look at what is actually "good" or "bad" artistically (which is somewhat subjective anyway) and come to a "proper" conclusion. They're going to vote on -- oooh Santana sang a song I really like in this episode or -- oohh Klaine makes out whoo! -- or hey, Kevin really likes this episode it must be good. That's just kinda how people are.

These polls really shouldn't invalidate your own feelings on things.

Nor should they give anyone reason to feel they're superior.

They're opinions, and we're all only human. So, in general, let's all not be asshats on the internet. ;)

***

As for Santana -- you know, I was thinking about it as I got up this morning -- I think I want to do a character study on her. Just to kind of explore what I think about the character.

But yes - maybe something that is forgotten a little bit, especially in the tragedy of Naya's passing - is that Santana was originally coded as a villain. And villains don't do very nice things. I mean, she herself said the only straight she is is straight up bitch.

But also -- there is a difference between saying - hey, this character is not doing nice things and -- hey you suck for liking this character. I wish the nature of fandom wasn't this way. You don't have to trash one thing to like another. And you can even say you don't like the thing - that's fine. But attacking people personally is never okay. And as long as I've been in fandoms, it's always been a problem.

Be better guys. And keep on keeping on.

<3 <3 <3

[waywordhearts]

hey! i’m talia (25, pst) and i’m slowly getting myself back into writing following the break that life forced me to take. i’ve mostly roleplayed in groups but in wanting less restrictions and the hope to be able to write more varying stories i’ve decided to jump back into 1x1 and indie rp. i do write on discord but i honestly prefer tumblr. i’m a creature of habit, what can i say? 

here are my favorite fcs to use: 

priscilla quintana, melisa pamuk, nathalie kelley, ana de armas, yara shahidi, julia dalavia, melissa barrera, kylie bunbury, phoebe tonkin, im jinah, rachel mcadams, jessica chastain, ozge yagiz, alicia vikander, and rebecca rittenhouse

casey deidrick, ryan gosling, kendrick sampson, manny montana, can yaman, chris evans, henry golding, jesse williams, jon bernthal, jamie dornan, paul mescal, lewis tan, and theo james

note: there are more fcs to love this is just the short list and tend to be my go-tos!

when it comes to wanted opposites i am fairly open. i much prefer you use an fc that you have the most muse for. that said, i will happily take any of the fcs listed above as opposites!

if you’d like to interact, please like or comment on this post or shoot me a message! continue reading below the cut for more information including my rules!

writing style: i do use legacy editor and prefer it. however, i am all good with using beta editor should you need to as i understand that not everyone has access to legacy editor. my writing range tends to go from a small paragraph to multiple and i do love the utilization of gifs. i would prefer replies not be excessively formatted and if possible please use small/medium gifs — accessibility!

plotting style: i love to set up a plot and release the muses lol. it’s much more fun to just let the muses figure things out and see where the writing takes us and how things develop and progress naturally. that said, i love tossing around headcanons and setting up backstories and all that good stuff. i prefer not to overly plot. i think random starters and tossing whomever you’re musing in is great fun! its great to see what we can come up with!

characters: i do have a roster of muses that are ready to go and love your muses down. but i am also more than happy and willing to create muses specific to plots!

Adria Arjona as Milena Solis, a 30 yr old vertex cinema owner

Alicia Vikander as Beate Hellström, a 34 yr old clinical psychologist

Ana de Armas as Benita Montero, a 34 yr old lounge singer & amateur art dealer

Can Yaman as Taner Dursun, a 33 yr old former bodyguard & security company owner

Casey Deidrick as Cash Henley, a 34 yr old musician

Casey Deidrick as Greyson Hendrix, a 35 yr old construction contractor

Casey Deidrick as Matthew Sullivan, a 34 yr old beer maker & owner of Sully’s Tavern (looking for baby mama & longterm ex-girlfriend plots)

Chris Evans as Samuel Harrison, a 38 yr old novelist

Henry Golding as Sean Lim, a 36yr old art restoration specialist

Im Jinah as Nari Moon, a 30 yr old hacker and hotelier heir

Jamie Dornan as Conway Dowling, a 42 yr old restauranteur

Jesse Williams as Ezra Maverick, a 41 yr old professional poker player

Jessica Alba as Kassandra Solano, a 42 yr old real estate agent

Jessica Chasten as Shay Westwood, a 45 yr old ATF agent

Jon Bernthal as Nathan Ford, a 44 yr old former cop, trust fund baby, and now barista

Julia Dalavia as Noa Santana Teixeira, a 28 yr old podcast host & creator

Kendrick Sampson as Nolan Kingston, a 34 yr old investigative journalist

Kylie Bunbury as Simone Burke, a 34 yr old medical examiner

Lewis Tan as Alexander Hou, a 38 yr old real estate developer

Lucas Bravo as Jonas Ernshaw, a 38 yr old private investigator with a new identity and dark past

Manny Montana as Romo Beltran, a 40 yr old tattoo artist

Melisa Asli Pamuk as Ela Aydin, a 31 yr old author

Melisa Asli Pamuk as Serra Kavas, a 32 yr old actress & artist

Melisa Pamuk as Halide Demirci, a 31 yr old publisher

Melissa Barrera as Mia Franco, a 32 yr old private investigator

Nathalie Kelley as Angelia Paredes, a 35 yr old book cover artist & voice actor

Özge Yağız as Reyhan Saylak, a 28 yr old disgraced ballet dancer

Paul Mescal as Keith Buckley, a 28 yr old coder

Phoebe Tonkin as Cheyenne O’Hara, a 32 yr old theology professor

Phoebe Tonkin as Genevieve Bardot, a 31 yr old professional photographer

Priscilla Quintana as Andrea Romero, a 30 yr old drug manufacturer & bartender

Priscilla Quintana as Antonella Ibarra, a 30 yr old chef

Priscilla Quintana as Lucía Socarras, a 30 yr old heir to a horse racing farm/business & bloodstock agent

Rachel McAdams as Selina Vale, a 43 yr old spy / mercenary

Rebecca Rittenhouse as Shay Howard, a 34 yr old real estate attorney

Ryan Gosling as Joshua Lincoln, a 33 yr old MotoX racer & Flat track racer & bank robber

Theo James as Ethan Elmore, a 40 yr old thief

Yara Shahidi as Nima Sanaz Abbasi, a 25 yr old aspiring filmmaker

themes: town/city, slice of life, crime/gang, espionage, mature

these are my rules for interacting/writing:

please be 21+

all muses must be 25+

please be patient. i work a full-time job and have my family to take care of so i will be slow to do replies during the week. most of my activity will be on the weekends. 

extension of #3 — i tend to do replies in the order i receive them unless i have insane muse for a particular thread and i need to get it done and out of the way because it’s all i can think about. please please please do not assume this means disinterest if i do not do your thread first or if i do replies out of order. muse is weird and these actions do not mean i do not enjoy or love our threads.

communicate! i cannot read your mind and you cannot read mine so i appreciate communication if something is off or wrong or if you have questions or would like to chat and plot about threads. i love talking headcanons too btw so feel free to hit me up any time! 

if ever you’re not feeling a thread, muse, connection you have all the right to drop the thread/connection. again, i would appreciate communication or a heads up but i also understand. 

i do not chase down replies. if your reply doesn’t show up in my activity or if i’ve missed it on my dash then it will not end up in my drafts. please don’t take this personally. i do not have the time to go hunting for things usually. if you feel a reply was missed i’d appreciate a nudge or a link. that said, i will do my best to stay on top of things!

i have adhd. concentrating and focus is a challenge for me. i can also be forgetful. just a heads up is all. 

basically, i love long replies and writing novels back and forth but at the same time they can also overwhelm me fairly easily. i do tend to write long replies but never ever feel the need to match me. write what works for you and your muse. 

discord is available upon request!