#Honestly been thinking a lot about the body beyond kink things

[caramel-onions]

Esoteric philosophical horny posting at 10 in the morning, but in thinking about feedist themes, that as a kink feedism inherently has the capacity to normalize body change in a positive manner.

I think there's definitely this sort of horror & whole societal self-hatred placed on weight gain even when it's something your body just kind of does automatically, while you're just living your life.

That you can indeed just let the soft animal of your body love what it loves

And mine loves food

and when not trying to compare myself or fit into certain purviews

I love it

It's softness the curves & folds of it

That being fat & or fatter can be cool sexy and hot.

And I can love so deeply that in others that the bodies they build & have things of true beauty I adore, I literally can't not love it in myself

I'm so excited to live & fully customize the character I got going on!!

because in the end I think feedism is something that lets me me take ownership of the body I have and love it both as it is and what ever it will go on to be!

[xxsabitoxx]

Geto Suguru NSFW A-Z

Part of my 20k follower celebration (past due)

Warnings: if it’s not abundantly clear, this is smut :)

A/N: in honor of hitting 20k followers a while back, I’m going to be posting 10 NSFW alphabets for JJK men — scheduled post 6

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Suguru is so soft and reassuring after sex. He won’t make you lift a finger, going out of his way to clean you up and get you water. If you ask for a snack or a meal, he’ll return with it. If you ask for a hot bath or shower? He’s setting it up for you. Suguru will go above and beyond to make sure you are happy and satisfied because you go out of your way to do the same for him. He’s very much an act of service love language kinda guy. 

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Suguru loves your hips. He loves to hold them, he loves to bite them and kiss them, he loves to feel you squirming while he keeps you in place. His hands are naturally drawn to them. 

On himself, Suguru takes pride in his broad shoulders. He loves the feeling of your hands touching them, nails running down them, the way you cling to them as he fucks you. 

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Suguru really enjoys coming on your face. He loves pulling out of your mouth right before he cums just to jerk off the rest of the way and cover your face and tongue. He’s also very partial to creampies but at this point who isn’t — 

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Suguru really wants to use toys on you in public and even likes the idea of you using them on him. The remote control kind that vibrates, he likes the idea of you being at his mercy but secretly likes the idea of him being at yours. He also really likes the idea of predator/prey play, the idea of chasing you around to get what he wants (so long as you’re consenting). He’s brought it up a little bit, you’ve even had a few instances where it’s “happened” but it’s more so you giggling as he chases you around the house and catches you because you teased him. He wants to play a game of sorts, where you’re being hunted by him, but he’s too embarrassed to really delve into this little kink seriously. So he can settle with the playful chasing for now. 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Suguru has a lot of experience. He’s been with a handful of partners and has had multiple hookups. More so after becoming a cult leader. He certainly had people flocking to him with interest but he didn’t act upon their advances until after his deflection. Suguru is not shy about watching porn and even camgirls/camboys. He’s browsed through hentai mangas and even read a couple of raunchy novels. He knows what he’s doing to say the very least. 

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Suguru loves doggy, he loves watching your ass jiggle with the force of his thrusts. He also enjoys seeing you struggle to keep yourself up, arms and legs feeling weak as he fucks you. Suguru also enjoys having your back pressed flush to his front, angled so his hips can thrust into you while he uses his arm to keep you up. Either around your chest or around your neck… heh

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Suguru leans more on the serious / sensual side of things. It’s rare for him to make comments that are snarky or cause you to laugh while fucking. But if there is a chance you two bump heads or something “funny” occurs, he’ll definitely laugh and tease you about it later even if it wasn’t your fault. 

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Considering the lengths he goes to take care of his luscious long hair, Suguru takes his pubic grooming quite seriously (lmao). Honestly I think he keeps his hair fairly long but not long enough for it to be a turn off. It’s black like the rest of his hair and tbh I totally see him using conditioner on it (giggling at the thought bye)

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Super romantic even when he’s pissed off. Suguru will change his attitude left and right, fucking you stupid and going on and on about your attitude just to shower you in praise and reassure you the moment he sees tears or hesitancy in your eyes. He’ll try his damn hardest to never take things too far, always making sure you know you are loved by him and he isn’t just using you for sex. You mean the world to him and he wants to make sure you know that. 

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Suguru isn’t huge on masturbation after he gets with you. Before meeting you though? He got himself off once a day at least. If he wasn’t hooking up with someone, he was getting himself off using his own fist. It got to the point where he was doing it so frequently that he invested in a pocket pussy. He’s embarrassed about it even though he knows he shouldn't be. He kept it even after meeting you and will let you use it on him just to tease him. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Love it or hate it, I think Suguru has a big ole daddy kink. Accompanying that daddy kink, I think this man has an unrelenting breeding kink. He loves when you’re a brat, giving him the opportunity to put you in your place. He also has a thing for predator/prey play, he likes when you try and get away from him… knowing full and well that you are trapped regardless (consensually of course) 

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Suguru enjoys the challenge the shower brings him, an opportunity to show of his strength by holding you up against the wall and fucking you stupid. Suguru also enjoys fucking you in the backseat of his car… even when his personal driver is driving it f

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Sexy pajamas… like the silky matching sets. That paired with the amount of skin being shown off? Drives him absolutely wild. Suguru also enjoys when you call him “Sir” in front of his followers, bending down a little too far in your “work” attire so his mind runs wild. 

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Suguru is strongly against age play. He likes when you call him daddy, he knows you like it when he calls you baby/baby girl/baby boy. But Suguru does not fuck with the age play idea, if you start acting like a child while he fucks you he’s gonna get very weirded out. He enjoys the pet name aspects of the kink but that’s truly it. 

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Giving. Suguru is so utterly obsessed with pussy eating/dick sucking. He will beg you on his hands and knees, praying for you to say yes and let him go down on you. He dreams of it and would be content being suffocated by your sex. 

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Suguru will adjust his pace to your liking but he will always fall into the rougher, faster pace side of things. He can’t help it when he gets so lost in pleasure, his hips move on their own accord and that typically means fucking you until your entire body is moving with the effort. He also finds a lot of amusement in your moans stuttering due to the force of his hips. 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Suguru loves a good quickie. Especially when he’s in between healing clients. Bending you over his desk and fucking you absolutely stupid clears his head before dealing with more of his insufferable clientele. (Heh sorry?) 

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Suguru is a massive risk taker. He doesn’t care if there is a chance of getting caught, he doesn’t care if people can see. Suguru is willing to try most things at least twice,  if he didn’t enjoy it the first time he’s willing to give it a second go just to make sure. 

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

How long Suguru can last depends on how long it’s been since he last fucked you. Typically he can last up to 8-10 minutes if you’ve been consistent fucking. But if it’s been a week or two apart? He can last 4 minutes tops. But his stamina doesn’t run out after, he can go 3-5 rounds if not more. 

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Suguru isn’t shy about toy use, they aren’t usually his go to items but he’s not one to shy away from him. He’s a bit meh on dildos because why have them when you have his cock… but everything else he’s down to use/try.  

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Suguru has a mean streak in him, if you piss him off he’s gonna be very unfair towards you during his punishment. He’ll go to both extremes: edge you till you’re crying and then make you cum until you’re begging him to stop. He’ll mock you, telling you to make up your mind. His aftercare is always immaculate though, and he makes sure to have safe words with you. 

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

At first Suguru tried so hard to keep his nosies to a minimum. He was unbelievably shy about making anything more than a groan or cursing. It wasn’t until meeting you and getting truly comfortable that he let himself go just a bit. He moans, whines, curses, even gets teary eyed if he’s feeling that good. He doesn’t try and restrain them either, letting them come out however loud they are with no care. 

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Suguru likes to record the two of you fucking when he knows he has to go away on a business trip and you can’t come with him. He likes filming both POV videos and 3rd person videos so he can watch them back and reminisce on your last time together. He’ll get off watching them when he knows he can’t call you because you’re already sleeping.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Suguru is an even 5 inches when soft and just over 6 ½ when hard. While he may not be as long as Satoru, he’s certainly girthier. He’s got a pretty tan color going up his shaft, his tip is a rosy pinkish red and he curves upwards. His dick can be mildly intimidating to some, so he takes care to prep you thoroughly before even thinking of going in. Suguru is also not shy about using lubes and oils, the wetter the better ;) 

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

As shocking as it seems, Suguru has a higher sex drive than Satoru. He arguably has the highest sex drive among jjk men in my opinion. He’s a closeted freak. He can control himself though, especially if you aren’t in the mood. 

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Suguru can get pretty tired after sex but he won’t allow himself to get comfortable and sleep until he assures you’re taken care of. While he can get exhausted from the activities, he knows he worked you out way more. So his priority will always be you. Once you’re content and sleeping, it only takes Suguru like 5 minutes tops to knock out for the night.

[frenchkisstheabyss]

♰ ⱠɆ₲łØ₦ ♰

♰ Pairings: demon!matz x chubby!fem!reader, demon!wooyoung x chubby!fem!reader, a sprinkle of demon!san x chubby!fem!reader, (eventual priest yeosang/jongho/yungi x chubby!fem!reader in the future)

♰ Genre: demon au/horror/smut

♰ Summary: Congratulations, darling! It's your destiny to be impregnated by four demons in an ancient Satanic sex ritual that'll lead to the birth of the Antichrist and bring about the end times. Now hop down into this demons' layer and let's get this thing going. Armageddon awaits.

♰ Word Count: 3.1kish

♰ Warnings: breeding kink, unprotected sex, no pulling out, double vaginal penetration, overstimulation, nipple play, breast play, rough sex, lots of breath play, ritualistic sex, scratching, a lil blood, oral sex (f receiving), sensory play, a lil nibbling, huge huge demon dicks so there's mucho vaginal stretching, the dicks can shapeshift (yes, shapeshift), demons give some dom vibes, reader's for sure subby, a lil possessiveness, demonic powers, religious themes, bondage, a lil choking, telepathy, your body's controlled via powers at some point, pet names (pet, little one, darling, good girl), and that should be it.

♰ A/N: Hold on, hear me out, I can explain. No, I can't. I'm a heathen. I like spooky shit and fucking demons so, ya know, here we are. This is the first part in a series I'm writing and it'll probably only get more unhinged from here honestly so, yeah, hop in babes. It's apocalypse time.

“And he asked him, ‘What is thy name?’And he answered saying, ‘My name is Legion, for we are many’” - Matthew 5:9

♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ Laberinto del Demonio ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰

Tucked away on the tree shrouded grounds of an aging Spanish manor, a labyrinth spirals deep into the earth. Beneath the lush grass and packed dirt, surrounded by the twisted roots of trees that feast upon the decaying corpses of those who attempt to intrude, this labyrinth is home to fearsome creatures who’ve peacefully slumbered here for hundreds of years. But tonight they awaken. For you. 

“Such a beautiful girl. Just let me…��� Wooyoung compliments, fussing with a few flyaway strands of your hair. In the year that’s passed since Wooyoung came into your life all he’s done is fuss over you. You’ve never known a more attentive lover. Never met a man so intent on catering to your every whim.

Wooyoung likes to say that it’s the Fates that brought the two of you together but that’s more than a grave exaggeration on his part, it’s an outright lie. If he’d waited on the Fates it’d have been another 200 years before he stumbled upon a female descendant of your bloodline. Finding you by any means necessary, however brutal, was paramount to fulfill his mission and to soothe the heart that ached for what he lost when his love was stripped from him all those centuries ago.

Your resemblance to her is uncanny but everything else about you is incredibly unique. It stimulates him in endless ways, everyday with you marked by some new, exciting experience. He adores you beyond measure and the others, soaking you in through their collective consciousness, have grown incredibly fond of you too. 

“There. Perfect, as always” he smiles, taking a step back to admire your silk adorned figure glowing under the light of the moon.

Atop the labyrinth, you admire the torch lit staircase that spirals beneath you. It emits a certain energy that hangs heavy in the crisp autumn air, drawing you towards it. You know what awaits you tonight. Wooyoung went over it with you a dozen times in the last 24 hours alone. It’s something you long for, something that has your body flush with heat at the mere thought of. Yet you can’t seem to shake the nerves that have your fingers trembling as the handsomely dressed dark haired man takes your hand.

Wooyoung strokes your cheek and you soften at his touch, “Are you nervous, my pet?” 

“Not nervous. It’s just…” you sigh, nibbling at your inner lip, “What if I’m not who you think I am? What if I can’t handle it?” 

Wooyoung lets out a laugh you’ve come to liken to a jackal. Loud, mischievous, and undeniably his. “Can’t handle it? It’s that all you’re worried about?” 

He steps in closer to you, stealing a quick, passionate kiss from your crimson stained lips. “You were made for this. In every lifetime you have been and in every lifetime you’ll always be. Now come, the others are waiting.” You soak in Wooyoung’s words, forever a sponge ready to absorb his praise, and gift him the faint smile he needs to lead you forward.

Less forward, more down. 

Down past walls built of jagged stone, thick vines weaving between the cracks sprouting tiny emerald flowers you’ve never seen before. Down past ancient symbols carved in meticulously measured increments. It seems to be instructions of some sort. For what you aren’t sure but a tugging in the pit of your stomach tells you that you’ll soon find out. 

At last reaching the bottom of the labyrinth you find yourself in a cavernous room dimly illuminated by a hundred or so candles. At the center you spot a large pool of slithering black silk not unlike that which hugs your body. Wooyoung leads you to the center and, as he does, you feel the material begin to writhe against your skin. It snakes its way around your curves, exposing your plush figure to the warmth of the pit as you sense you’ve become one with it.

A chorus of voices begin whispering in your ear, invisible hands grasping at your most intimate areas. Wooyoung captures your lips in another kiss, already groaning at thoughts of what he has planned for you. His hands wander below your waist, fingernails growing sharper as they sink into the softness of your ass. You throw your arms around him, deepening the kiss, but he indulges you only for a brief moment before he begins to back away.

“Soon, my love” he says without speaking a word, “See you on the other side.” 

“Woo, wait!” you call out to him but a strong wind whips through the room, extinguishing the flames of the outer candles and swallowing him into darkness. The force of the wind knocks you off your feet but you land with no impact at all, the pit catching you in its embrace, thin strips of silk winding around your thighs. The air around you floods with laughter layered upon laughter, Woo’s melded somewhere in between. 

“Aah, finally I see her through my own eyes” a voice breathes out, tickling your spine. 

“Such a precious little human. So cute” another much deeper voice hums, the vibration ringing through your chest. 

“And she looks so, so…” a third voice chimes in, light as a feather, “Soft!” 

In the blink of an eye the silk wrapped around your thigh transforms into a hand, pitch black with razor sharp claws dripping a thick scarlet liquid down your leg. You let out a scream of absolute terror and it transforms back into the harmless material. It’s as if it were all in your head and the hand was never there to begin with.

“Seonghwa, you’re scaring her!” Wooyoung shouts and invisible arms envelope you, comforting you as your fear subsides. 

“Oh, no. I’m so sorry. I got a little carried away” Seonghwa apologizes, emerging from the pit in his human form.

He swims through the pit as if it were a pool, only his torso visible as he comes between your legs, his much gentler hands smoothing their way up your thigh. You don’t recognize the face of this beautifully androgynous creature but you’re positive you’ve felt his energy around you before.

“Is this better for you?” he asks, breath hitching at the sight of the slick, sweet arousal dripping from your core. 

“Seonghwa?” you moan his name for the first time as his tongue extends to flick your bud. “Woo’s told me so much about you.”

A shimmer of gold ripples across the dark pools that sit where his eyes should be, lips curling into a grin that’s both alluring and sinister. “Aah and what did he tell you about me? Good things?” he asks, his tongue whipping down to prod your tight hole. Seonghwa delights in the string of moans you release as he teases you, pushing his moist tongue into you little by little. Your walls eager to grant him entrance, stretching to accommodate the increasing thickness and length of his tongue. 

“Good? Y-yes, good” you breathe out, shocked at the depths his tongue manages to reach. There are no limitations, no bottoming out. He slips his way into every part of you. Tickling the back of your stomach, lapping at your walls in every direction at once. You can taste yourself on the back of your tongue, a sudden fullness in your throat suppressing your desperate moans. Your body’s no longer yours. It does only what he wishes it to. Moves only as he commands. 

“You’re being greedy. Share her. Now” something inhuman growls, breaking through the fog in your mind.

It’s not something you were meant to hear, the shedding of those performative voices existing solely for your comfort, but you’re far from afraid. On the contrary, such brutality laced with so much need has you clenching tighter, juices gushing out of you as Seonghwa’s tongue thrusts harshly into your core.

Seonghwa grunts defiantly, lifting you a few inches above the pit without laying a finger on you. Your arms dangle at your sides, fingertips grasping at nothing as your body arches against air. Droplets of your arousal run down your thigh, landing on the silk below and the creatures around you release a collective sigh of satisfaction. They can taste you, the ghost of your flavor lingering on their tongues. 

“You are like the other women in your bloodline…” the inhuman voice whispers, becoming more human the closer it gets, “Delicious.”

Two hands reach from outside of your field of vision to caress your plump breasts, firmly pinching your sensitive nipples. Your head falls to the side and you're met with another new face. This one more boyish in his handsomeness but more authoritative in his presence. Wooyoung told you that you’d know his leader when you met him. That you’d feel this immense need to gain his approval, to be as obedient to him as you can be.

“This is Hongjoong” you think and the leader smiles in response.

“Delicious and smart, mmm” he hums, leaning into your neck and breathing your scent deep into his lungs. “Let her speak.” 

The fullness vacates your throat at once, leaving you gasping for air, all those suppressed moans echoing off the labyrinth’s walls. Seonghwa’s tongue flutters softly inside of you now, his pace slowing just enough for you to speak. 

“You know what you’re here for, don’t you little one? Our Wooyoung’s explained it to you well?” Hongjoong asks, kissing you on the neck, his canines nicking at your smooth, fragrant flesh.

You let out a whine, adrenaline coursing through your veins, “Yes…he…everything…told me.”

Hongjoong laughs at your incoherence, finding it quite adorable, “And this is what you want? To let us have our way with you?” He releases one of your breasts, twisting the bud one last time before his hand's gliding down your body to grab handfuls of your belly. “To let us fill you with our seed and let it grow so that we’ll be, all of us, a family?” 

You’re fixated on him, a constellation of tears twinkling on your lashes, “I want it. I want this.” 

“Aah, then we shouldn’t waste any more time” Hongjoong sighs, gesturing to Seonghwa, “Let’s take her together, shall we?” 

Seonghwa’s tongue retreats slowly from your core in an S motion that makes the tip lash sharply at your walls on its way out. The space between you and the pit below begins to close, all current information misleading you to believe the arms you fall into will belong to Hongjoong.

“Relax your body and watch the skies” Seonghwa instructs as you fall against his chest and the vines between the stone walls climb their way up the ceiling. They radiate a vibrant amethyst, the sprouting emerald flowers emitting a sparkling dust that mists through the air. A trail of it drifts down the wall, drawing your attention to the shadows cast upon it by the light of the candles.

That’s when you see it. The silhouette of the creature crawling its way up your body. You’ve yet to feel him but he’s there, advancing up your figure, twisted horns brushing your cheek as it’s face meets yours. Hongjoong takes you carefully by the throat, tilting your head to face him in his human form, “The skies not the shadows, pet. Never our shadows.” It isn’t a threat and it need not be. Your obedience is promised, sealed with a kiss richer than any wine.

Hongjoong’s mouth sips hungrily from yours as he spreads your legs, the swollen head of his cock leaking arousal as it stretches your already soaked core. “Mmphmm” you whine between his lips, your lids squeezing shut the further he pushes into you. He grants pleasure to your walls unlike any the earthly realm could bring. He seems to transform inside of you, shifting into whatever he must to perfectly fill every ridge of your delicate pussy.

Your body wants to clench around him, to feel him as completely as it can but, no matter how hard you try, an invisible barrier prevents it. Anatomy 101 dictates that, with the size of what you’ve taken, there should be not a centimeter of free space. By all means you should be screaming in agony, not pouring out such blissful moans. But, as Woo said, you were made for this and so there’s room still when Seonghwa’s palms come to rest behind your knees, hips rising to lift his pulsing length into your warmth.

Your eyes fall open and Hongjoong breaks from the kiss, freeing you to gurgle and moan as you at last watch the skies. There’s no need for clenching now, no possible way for you to do so. Buried deep within you, they exist both as one and as two. As one when they thrust into you, their demonic growls contrasting the lightness of your moans. As two when they split at the head, charting their own courses to punish your tender nerve endings. 

Seonghwa nuzzles against your neck, licking beads of sweat from your shoulder before it extends down to trace your collarbone. Hongjoong cups one of your breasts, fingertips digging into its plushness as he purses his lips around your nipple, suckling at the bud. Seonghwa’s tongue envelopes your other breast, the tip of his tongue circling your nipple.

Your body’s overcome with an unnatural heat that ravages you like a wildfire. Your mind’s whirling as you think of everything and nothing at once. Your teary eyes remain glued to the skies—always the skies, never their shadows—and your senses begin to shift. No longer are you smelling the honeyed scent of the flowers, you’re tasting it. And what you smell are colors, amethyst and emerald now aromatic as if they were herbs. 

“You are such a beauty to behold” Hongjoong’s voice praises, breaking through the fractured barriers of your mind. 

Seonghwa’s voice coasts in after his. “We haven’t felt this alive in centuries” it says, tickling your consciousness as does the breath at the back of your neck. “Maybe we could keep her like this. Whining and quivering between us. Forever our plaything. Would you like that, darling?” 

Hongjoong dips a hand between your legs, gathering your slick and dragging his drenched fingers across your lips. His laughter rings out in your head, “I think she likes the idea of it. Maybe…”

“Aaah!” you let out a scream that cracks to pieces in your throat. You’re hit with a rush that makes you feel absolutely feral, your nails thrashing at Hongjoong’s back as it overtakes you. 

“Good girl” he coos, unphased by the blood trickling from his wounds, “Come your pretty little brains out for us.” 

Seonghwa allows your legs to drop, strips of silk reaching up to coil around your ankles. His arms come around your waist, keeping you in place to fuck into you harder and faster. Thrusting. Pulsing. Claiming you. Flooding you with their seed until it’s spilling from your core and you’re coming all over their cocks, soaking them in your juices. Never in your life have you felt this perfect. This complete.

It’s impossible to differentiate between the labored breathing shared between the three of you. Even as you drift down from your high your breaths all sound as if they’ve left the same body. You arrived at this place a human but maybe now not as much. A part of you has been given away and, if it means feeling this way forever, you don’t want it back. 

Seonghwa softly brushes your hair away from your cheek, showering it in kisses, “You’ll rest with us now.” 

“Don’t be afraid” Hongjoong says, kissing his way down your tummy, “It can get a bit dark down here.”

“Down where?” you ask weakly before you’re snatched beneath the surface of the pit. Instinctively you begin flailing your limbs in a desperate attempt to keep yourself from drowning but your panic’s soothed by the two sets of arms cuddling up to you.

Surrounded by their warmth, you let the darkness swallow you and drift off to sleep. 

♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ 2. Despertar ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰ ♰

“Woo!” you scream, shooting upright, your heart pounding in your ears. You can’t fathom how long you’ve been asleep, the finer details of the previous events lost in the haze of sleep. You look around for Woo, for any of them, but you’re met only with the light, sparkling mist that hung from the ceiling above the pit.

Stretching your aching legs you feel something slink across them. “Wh…what is this?” you gasp, watching the fluorescent vines curiously explore your figure. Flower buds bloom as the vines reach between your legs, curving to ride your thighs up and around your torso. 

“Pretty aren’t they?” Woo asks, appearing behind you without a sound. 

“Woo, you scared me!” you pout, tempted to elbow him in the shin for frightening you so terribly. 

Woo crouches down to loop his arms around you from behind. “I’m sorry. I didn’t expect you to be so easily frightened all things considered” he teases, resting his chin on your shoulder. A graceful wave of his hand and he’s plucked a flower from the vine, twirling it before your eyes. You marvel at its beauty, the emerald glow creating a halo around your irises.

“Where do these come from?” you ask, brimming with wonder.

There’s a rustling in a nearby corner, the silhouette of a broad shouldered man emerging from the darkness. He smiles at you as he steps into the light of the mist, striking you with his features. Woo tucks the flower behind your ear, pointing to the approaching man. “They come from the mountain.” 

The man kneels before you, his dimpled cheeks inches from your face, and the vines tighten around you at his will. “But you can call me San” he says, obviously as smitten with you as you are with him. “Are you ready for us, love?”

You swallow hard and take your last full breath of air before the vine’s snug around your neck. “Yes, mmm, ready” you moan softly, surrendering to the strength of the vines. 

San takes you by the chin, his thumb tracing your jawline, “Hmm, breaking you will be fun. Just try not to look down too much. Might get lightheaded.” 

“Down?” you ask, glancing around at the bed of vines. You put all of your focus into watching them, searching for something you might’ve missed. But they’re as they were before, humming and glowing, doing their master’s bidding.

San guides your head in the opposite direction, revealing the pit of writhing black silk and the room illuminated with candles. 

“Oh, darling, haven’t you figured it out yet? You aren't down there anymore” Wooyoung laughs, tossing a flower into the air and watching it drift down into the pit, “You’re up here.” 

[wri0thesley]

business dealings - sampo x reader (3.5k)

sampo's line of work has given him a lot of experience in getting what he wants.

cw: corruption kink, naive virgin reader, sampo is manipulative n kinda sleazy. reader is afab but no gendered terms/language are used. reader is chubby, shorter than sampo. loss of virginity, blowjobs, coming inside.

not sfw, minors dni.

At heart, Sampo is a businessman.

He knows what he wants - generally, as much shield as possible - and he's willing to do almost anything in order to get it. Bartering, trading, a little bit of illegality (it's only illegal if he gets caught, after all) - talking his way both out of and into things. 

So when you'd looked at him, with your eyes all pretty and big and doe-like, admiration leaking into your tone as you asked him about what the underworld was really like . . . he'd decided that what he wanted next was . . . well. You. 

It’s surprisingly easy. 

Easy, because you’re malleable and naive to the ways of the more . . . nefarious sides of society. You’ve never had to worry about stepping foot out of your comfortable life, beyond the vague threat of the Fragmentum and the Eternal Freeze that bothers every citizen of Belobog. But your life within the city isn’t threatened; you look at the Silvermane Guards with respect and awe, but you don’t honestly believe yourself in any danger. And because of that certainty that bad things will not happen to you, you’ve developed quite a cute interest in those other things - like Sampo, and his trips to the underworld, his easy way of slipping between things, his adventures and the embellished stories he tells you. And you’ve become quite easy to get information out of, on top of all of that - anything to help Sampo out, after all. 

Oh, you’re adorable. 

He thinks about you a lot, when he’s embroiled in another danger he brought upon himself - imagines how to spin it so he’s the hero, and you look at him with those wide eyes and your mouth open, lips soft and kissable in the glow of the heat lamps, and you breathlessly say; “Oh, Mr Koski!” in that awestruck little tone he cannot get enough of. 

He thinks about you a lot, too, alone in his bed at night with one hand wrapped around his cock and his back arching. He thinks about the shape of your body beneath your clothes; the ample curve of your chest, the wide contour of your hips and how perfectly they would fit in his grip if you were beneath him. The fullness of your cheeks and lips, and how they would look wrapped around his length - the soft noises you’d make as he pushed it in just a little further than you could handle. 

He thinks, perhaps, he should feel guilty about it. The thing in your eyes when you look at him is almost hero worship. But Sampo Koski did not get to where he is by way of self-reproach, and surely one wants to help out their heroes when they can? 

So he does what he always does. He sets his plan in motion. 

And if this plan does not end in shield, but in someone sweet wrapped around his finger, thighs wrapped around his hips, mouth wrapped around his cock? Well. It’s a plan nonetheless, and Sampo has never been a man who says no to the spoils of his own schemes. 

He starts only small. 

Bends his head closer to yours when the two of you talk, making sure that you’re made entirely aware of the breadth of his shoulders and his biceps, the peek of his bare chest beneath his complicated (but fashionable--) outfit. Allows the sharp emerald of his eyes to wander, just enough to be appreciative - just enough that he can sense how your cheeks heat, how you twist your fingers shyly into the fabric of your garments. 

Lets his hand wander to a place that skirts the edge of being respectable; your waist, but almost your hip. The dip of your lower back, but so close to the tantalising curve of your rear. Your cheek, but so so close to the delicate pulse beating in your throat that he sees how it speeds up at his touch. 

Pays you compliments, thrown out as casually as a breath but aimed to strike at the heart. How pretty you look today. How much he appreciates your time together. How you’re always the highlight of his time on the surface - how he simply couldn’t imagine not coming to see you. You respond, as he knew you would, with eager little soft-voiced entreaties about how you feel the same, how much you appreciate him, how you’re always so happy to see him. How you just love having the chance to help him.  He knows that the time is ripe when he catches your chin in gloved fingers and smiles down at you and says, his voice carefully pitched like affable velvet;

“And what if I asked you for your help with something else, sweetheart?”

Your eyes go all big and wide. Even through the fabric of his gloves, he can feel the heat that has risen to your face. There was never any doubt about it, but he’s glad to have the confirmation even so - you’ve been nursing an innocent crush on him. 

It won’t be so innocent when he’s done with you. 

“Mr Koski,” you say to him, your voice squeaking with nerves. He can see, again, the quick beating of your pulse - the eager-to-please nature that makes you such a thrillingly delicious prospect to have in his bed. That hopeful look that you can be of use to him. He wants to ruin you. He loves the way you say his name. “Of course, I’d do anything you asked me to!” 

He chuckles at you affectionately and leans in so close he can feel your breath against his lips. You tremble under his touch even now - he can’t wait to see how you’ll tremble under his clever fingers later on, when he has you somewhere more private. You look into his eyes with the breathless delight of someone having a fantasy come true. Naive little thing. Still. It wouldn’t hurt for him to play the gentleman just a tiny bit longer. 

“Can I kiss you?” He asks, chivalrous as he wants you to think he is. Your lips part, and he thinks about choking you on his cock even as you go giddy inside over the concept of your first kiss.

“Yes,” you breathe - and Sampo’s lips meet yours. They curve into a smile as you kiss back - unsure, prim, pure as the driven snow. 

Sampo’s plan has been a great success. 

He’s going to get what he wants. 

He takes you somewhere that he knows will not ask questions. The Goethe Hotel is not an option, but a man like Sampo doesn’t get where he is by not having connections - connections who will not ask about the pretty, wide-eyed Overworld denizen who’s clinging to his hand so tightly, looking around like they’ve found themselves in a storybook. You don’t even have the sense to ask him where he’s taking you - you’re all caught up in the romance of his kiss, the sweetness of his compliments, and the fact that your daydreams are coming true. 

“You wanna make me happy, don’t you?” He asks you, thumb skating over your cheek, and you nod at him with a sweetness that makes his teeth ache. “Come here, sweetheart. Pretty thing.” 

You shiver under his touch like a shy flower blooming, petals soft and untouched by human hands. You whisper out his name when his fingers find the buttons of your outfit, your skin going hot and nervous - but he makes soft little noises of comfort, reassuring you even as you’re bared before his eyes. He can barely stop himself throwing you onto the bed and having his way with you. 

“Look at you,” he says instead, as you stand before him all shivering and hopeful and naked. “You’re gorgeous.” You press your thighs together at the compliment, teeth biting into the plumpness of your bottom lip. His hands slide over you appreciatively, pulling you closer to where he sits on the bed. He maps out those same places that have haunted his wet dreams; all of those curves, the plumpness of your thighs and your stomach, the weight of your chest in his hands as he swipes his thumb over your nipples and you make a sweet little noise of surprised desire that makes his cock throb in his trousers. 

“C’mon,” he says, with that crooked smile that makes fireworks go off in your stomach. “Would Sampo hurt you, sweet thing?” You shake your head, immediately - even now, you’re unwilling to think the worst of him. You’re perfect. “Get on your knees. I’m gonna teach you somethin’.” 

It’s a scene right out of his nighttime fantasies when you hesitantly sink to your knees. Your desire to please warring with your desire to hide. But oh, do you look lovely down there. 

“That’s right,” he practically purrs, stroking your cheek. He feels giddy with the power of it all as he looks down at you - and as he unzips himself, you stifle a gasp and he feels his cock twitch in his grip. He’s proud enough of what he’s packing, but he sees it through your eyes and wishes he could take a photograph of you right there and then. Hesitant and eager and shy all at once. “Open your mouth for me, hmm?”

Obediently, you do exactly as he asks. One of his hands fastens about the back of your head, keeping you in place - you start but do not fight it, looking up at him with your expression utterly open and guileless. You trust him, and the thought makes a ripple of pleasure go down his spine. Your tongue is pink and wet in the lamplight. 

“Good,” Sampo praises, and your skin heats again. He guides himself into your mouth - you make a soft noise of surprise, but don’t pull away - your eyes stay locked on him, an unspoken question in your eyes. Am I doing this right? Is this good? Are you happy with me, Mr Koski? “Use your tongue for me, sweetheart. That’s right. You’re doing great.”

You look up at him from between his thighs and he lets out a muffled groan of pleasure as your tongue swipes unsurely over the head of his cock. You’re so cute down there. Even better than he imagined. There’s no satisfaction like a plan that’s going off without a hitch - and as you manage to swallow down even more of his cock, as a trickle of drool escapes from the corner of your mouth and your eyes go watery with the effort, he can’t help but cant his hips into you.

“Shh, shh,” he says, as your eyes widen in surprise and you almost try and pull back. His hand stays in place on the back of your head. That look on your face is going to keep him company through some very lonely nights. “I’m only doin’ that because you feel so good, sweetheart. Don’t stop, okay? You’re so good for me. Perfect.”

The last comes as you bob your head, tongue tracing the veins of his shaft - he relaxes his grip just enough for you to carry on the movement. Sampo lets a sigh fall from his lips as he enjoys the wet tightness of your mouth around him, the hesitant licks. It’s not that he doesn’t appreciate someone who knows exactly what they’re doing in a blowjob - but something about you, and this? Something about knowing he’s the first man to have your mouth like this, to guide you through these motions? Nothing could compare. 

He almost doesn’t want to pull out. He almost wants to keep going - to see your surprise when he comes in your mouth, to implore you to swallow and call you such a good little thing, to shower you in praise until you’re dizzy and drunk from it - but . . . ah. Who knows when he’ll have the luxury of this much time with you again? And you keep shifting on your knees, your chest heaving, surprised by your own arousal . . .

It would be a hard heart indeed that didn’t let you have the full experience, and Sampo Koski is a soft touch. 

“D-did I do a bad job?” You babble, as he pulls his cock out of your mouth. It slaps softly and wetly against the plump fullness of your cheek and Sampo swallows back more thoughts of hitting your pretty face with it until you pout and beg him to put it back in, to choke you on it, to ‘please please please let me make you come Mr Koski--’

“Nah,” he says, affectionate and easy. “Not at all, sweetheart. I just . . . have other things I want to show you.” Your face is open and hopeful as he leans down again and takes your jaw in his hand. “Tell me something.”

“Anything,” you breathe to him, and he thinks that he could make you spill every secret in your pretty little head right there and then. 

“Are you wet for me, angel?” 

Your eyes widen, and he chuckles again. Your gaze flutters shyly around the room, away from Sampo’s own - but he doesn’t let go of your chin. He jerks it just so; not too hard, just enough to be playful. He doesn’t really need you to say it - not from the reaction you just had - but . . .

“C’mon,” he says again, smiling crookedly. “Tell me. I’m not gonna think less of you.”

You swallow. He raises one eyebrow.

“Do I need to check for myself?” He asks you, and shoots you a wink. “Stand up.” You follow the order helplessly, breathlessly, still just a little too shy to put word to the feelings that Sampo is pulling forth from you. His hand slides over the fullness of your thighs, and you reflexively push them together and win another laugh from him. “Don’t be shy,” he says. “Spread your legs. C’mon. I’ll be upset if you aren’t, y’know!”

You let out a slow breath as you follow his order and his palm curves around your thigh, as his fingers slide up and tease the seam of your sex - and Sampo follows suit, a satisfied exhale as he finds you hot and slick. He lets his fingers slip between the plump lips of your sex and wins a soft little ‘oh!’ of surprise, a flutter of your lashes. His cock twitches again. 

He fondles you for a few moments; lets his middle finger slide to your entrance, tease it and draw circles around it. You bite your lip again, but you spread your thighs further apart to allow him better access, breath hitching as he slides just the tip of one finger inside of you. His smile doesn’t falter as he looks at you. 

“Sweetheart,” he says to you, voice like smooth silk. He sinks his finger in further, to his knuckle - you’re tight but wet, and you take it easily. “You’re soaking.”

“I--I--” You falter, almost ashamed, and Sampo lets his eyes go half-lidded. There’s a whine to your voice that Sampo knows well. “Mr Koski--”

“Sampo,” he corrects you. His smile is rakish. “Mr Koski’s cute and all, but . . . not when I’ve got my fingers buried inside of you, yeah?”

“Sampo,” you breathe out, and he gently moves his finger; pumps it in and out of you a few times and enjoys the sight of your thighs flexing, of your body shivering. Your nipples are hard in the cool air, the tremble of your body a siren’s call to throw you onto the thin little mattress. He lets his thumb ghost across the swollen nub of your clit and you let out a strangled noise of pleasure, a whimper that’s so close to a moan he can taste it. 

“That’s right,” he says. “Let’s get you on the bed.”

You’re pliable to all of his pushing, all of his touching - obedient to a fault, as he kisses your cheeks and props your hips with pillows and lets his hands stroke all over your body, learning the most sensitive places. The soft noise of surprise when he digs his thumbs into the indent of your waist, the inhale when he grasps your hips, the flutter of your lashes when his lips brush across your stomach . . . he commits them to memory. Part of the fun of taking someone as sweet as you is teaching them all the pleasures they didn’t know their body was capable, and Sampo is a thorough man. 

You tremble for him so sweetly, when he finally has you caged beneath him. 

“You’re beautiful,” he says, again, and delights in the way you shiver, the shy way you pull away from his gaze. “Don’t hide.” The rub of the head of his cock through your slit, wetting himself in your slick, makes you squirm hot beneath him and gasp in surprise. He repeats the motion, swirling the tip of him against your clit, until you whine and your thighs twitch and he wonders if he could make you come just like this.

Right now, though . . . he doesn’t have the patience. 

Your hands curl into the broad muscle of his shoulders as he splits you open on his cock. You cry out, but it’s a noise that’s a culmination of pleasure and surprise as well as just a little sting, and Sampo commits it to memory the same way he tries to commit the velvet cling of your walls and the tight heat and the feeling of you, letting him take you in every way possible. 

“Sweetheart,” he says to you, his own words getting lost as months of fantasies and pining and imagining you come rushing to the forefront of his mind. “You feel incredible--”

He might say more. It’s hard to keep track of anything when he gets lost so quickly in the pounding of his cock against your walls and the way you gasp and cling to him as he fucks into you more desperately than he realised he was going to. You’re vice-tight about him, utterly willing to give yourself up and let him show you what to do. He has the sense to slip one hand between you both to play with your clit as he fucks you - Sampo Koski is a gentleman, thank you very much, he might be taking advantage of your naivety but obviously he’s going to make you come, dammit - and you respond to him with helpless, brainless whines and little thrusts of your hips. 

You’ve never felt like this before. You’ve touched yourself a few times - thought of Mr Koski a few times, if you’re honest with yourself - but this is new. The feeling of something thick stretching you out, of a handsome man above you sighing and whispering out your name . . . The delicious feeling, too, of doing something you’re not supposed to be doing. 

Your orgasm hits first, your body unused to the touches of someone who knows what they’re doing. Sampo is ruthless as you gasp out his name--

(“Mr Ko-- S-Sampo--!” - somehow, the way you trip over the title and replace it is even better than just hearing his name issue forth from your pretty mouth). 

His fingers don’t stop working over your clit even as you come, your channel pulsing around him wildly, your spine arching and a cry that’s pure pleasure working itself loose from your throat. All that your peak does is drive Sampo on, teeth grit, hips hungrily fucking into you until he feels himself twitch and his balls draw in tight and hot. 

He should pull out. The thought tickles the edges of his consciousness; that he should let his release splatter all over your thighs instead of filling you up with it, letting himself keep fucking it shallowly into your tight little cunt with the weak aftershocks pushing him to carry on thrusting--

But . . . oh. The thought of you beneath him, fucked out and leaking his come. Your virgin sex full to the brim with him, claimed and taken and filled . . . 

Sampo groans out your name and shoots rope after rope of his own release inside of you, losing track of anything but the feel of your body and the feeling of conquering something uncharted. 

You lie there beneath him, big pretty eyes blinking up at him, cheeks wet with tears of pleasure and surprise and over-stimulation. Your chest heaves against his, your heart rabbiting. Both of your skins sweat-slick where they press against one another. 

You look up at him like a hero who’s hung the moon and shown them a brand new world, and Sampo looks down at you like you’re just the cutest damn thing you’ve ever seen, committing the sight of you - fucked for the first time, ruined for the first time, claimed for the first time, and all by him - to memory. 

“You did great,” he says to you, and kisses you softly on the forehead. “Thanks for the help, sweetheart.”

He knew what he wanted, and he got it. But looking at you beneath him, remembering all the things he’s fantasised about, taking in how your hero worship doesn’t seem to have ebbed even the slightest bit . . . 

Business deals don’t have to be a one-time thing. 

[cassiusfen]

This isn't my art, (it's made by @ TheHearthFox over on Twitter) but I wanted to make a long post about why this work in particular speaks to me so goddamn much. I think such a massive part of the queer experience -- and also the furry experience -- is about the abstract. This can be seen in so many different aspects of furry "culture," from the concept of fursonas to kink and and other fetish content. You and I will never know what it's like to be a werewolf and transform under the full moon into the form of a big hulking furry beast. However, us furries create art and other works about the idea of it anyway. We never will be able to be our fursonas -- our often idealized and "perfect" versions of ourselves -- and part of that really hurts. It hurts so bad honestly, to the point where I can't quite put it into words. In terms of queer culture, I will never know what it is like to be a cis woman, and that also messes with me a lot. Yet, I'm still trans, my identity can change, I can perceive myself as whatever I damn well please. Identity allows you to shape yourself and the world around you in your own image, even if not everyone can see its beauty.

We have ways to get at least somewhat close to how we feel in our abstraction. VRChat allows you to make an avatar of what ever you want, whether it's your fursona or just an ideal version of you. Hell, it doesn't even have to be you, it could be anyone or anything really. We have a whole industry based around creating big ass costumes that allow people to at least look something like their desired character. But it's not enough. It's never enough. I ain't religious, but sometimes I feel like I've bitten the apple, been kicked out of the garden, and now I'm left to fend for myself with an identity that my physicality will never match. When I made my fursona using an avatar base in vrchat and configured it to match my real world body scales and looked down, I honestly started crying. I take the headset off, and I'm still me. Everyone takes the headset or fursuit off and they're still the body they were given, not what they would choose. Our reality is objective, and there's no way to really change that. We can act like animal people online all day, but the moment that screen shuts off, the moment we walk away, that warm, fuzzy feeling (hehe) fades.

To think abstract is to think beyond what you can normally sense. You will never get to brush the knots out of your fur in the morning, or play with your antennae while anxious (I see you bug people). We can still have those ideas, however. I know I'm on the third goddamn paragraph and I'm just now talking about the artwork I linked but this is an important concept to me. Usually, when I think of the abstract, it feels unreal, "fuzzy" so to speak. However, in HearthFox's piece, the objective reality appears out of focus and pixelated. It feels like even if we are unable to fully embrace the abstract, we can still embrace what we can of it, and bring some sort of color to a world that doesn't feel like it is made for us. The colors being outside of the lines could suggest that our abstract perception is maybe just "painted on" to the world around us, but is that a bad thing? Is it bad to take things in from the world around you, but still look at it all in your own unique way? I think not. This also isn't only about therian identity, or furry identity, or even queer identity -- it's also about neurodivergence. You are never in the wrong for thinking about the world in a way that is viewed as "non-standard" by the rest of the world. If you see yourself as a wolf, bee, fox, bear, raccoon, a fucking plane, it's not a bad thing. We can still identify however we want, and this modern way of looking at identity is the best way for us to embrace the abstract.

Go wild, go fucking stupid. Love yourself, if you're a fox, be a fox, there are ways you can feel that way, even if it's not all of the time. We can fight, we can love, we can still find ways to elation, even if sometimes existence itself feels wrong to you. This work is but one side of abstract thinking. Look at the color the fox has compared to the objective. Look how the fur drapes, how it runs down the body, or how the snout expresses emotion. Sometimes it feels melancholic, but you cannot tell me that trying your absolute damnedest to live your identity doesn't at least bring some color to your otherwise dreary and unfocused world.

Stay safe, love yourself no matter what.

[edgy-ella]

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice thoughts

Overall I really liked it! This is definitely Burton’s best outing in years. His signature quirky sense of humor is back, and it’s got some fun performances and a nice blend of practical effects and CGI. Go see it if you can.

From here on out I’m gonna get into spoiler territory so proceed with caution.

This movie along with the original Beetlejuice have made me realize that one of Burton’s unsung strengths as a director is his strong pacing. Both movies are very zippy, never lingering on one shot or scene for too long. That’s a good thing, too, because I don’t think this movie would’ve worked otherwise. The script juggles a lot of characters, old and new, and subplots that don’t tie in very well to each other, leading to a climax that feels like everyone lining up to get a slap in the face before exiting stage left. Burton’s directorial touches—snappy pacing and cartoony German Expressionism visuals—are what make the movie work.

There’s some sequel gap syndrome at play here but it’s not very distracting. I think it helps that there is a huge time skip between the two movies rather than something like Psychonauts 2 which takes place literally the next day after the first game ends. You don’t really question how Beetlejuice unshrunk his head or how he has a bunch of other shrunken head people working for him now; so much time has passed that you can just sort of infer it on your own. That being said, the movie seems to have abandoned the concept of afterlife social workers all being suicide victims.

There is meta humor but it’s all very subtle. It’s never a big punchline where the actors pause for the audience to laugh, it’s always incorporated into the dialogue fairly naturally and there for people in the know to chuckle at. One character says that she’s “never doing Disney again” while talking about Halloween costumes. Neither of my friends picked up on this bit, but I got a nice giggle out of that one. Like you go Tim you’re finally out of your abusive relationship with the mouse.

For those of you that have seen the musical, it is a little distracting early on in the movie because it seems like Lydia and Astrid’s character arc is the exact same one that Charles and Lydia go through in the musical. The kid’s got a dead parent and living parent won’t talk about them, which becomes a source of tension. Astrid doesn’t go running into the Netherworld to find her dad like Lydia does for her mom in the musical, but strangely enough, she just…kinda bumps into him? It’s very strange. He’s working for customs in the afterlife and they just so happen to pass by each other as Astrid is nearly sent to the great beyond. I’m too tired right now to go into what this kind of thing means thematically.

Jenna Ortega gives a good performance as Astrid, but I wasn’t really sold on her character. I appreciate that she’s not just Lydia 2.0, but the Snarky Politically Active Teen Who’s Above All Of The Superficial Blonde Girls™ has been done to death already. I don’t see her having the same cultural impact that Lydia had when the first movie came out.

Monica Bellucci’s character, Beetlejuice’s ex-wife Delores, honestly feels like trailer fodder. She suffers the most from the movie’s lack of focus, especially for how much she’s hyped up at the beginning. Once again, she gives a good performance, but the script isn’t doing her any favors. Bizarrely enough, they didn’t really keep the gag of Beetlejuice keeping her chopped off finger/wedding ring? She’s still missing a finger, but she doesn’t get it back from Beetlejuice. It’s just there with the rest of her. She staples it back onto her body the same time she does her torso and legs.

One of the writers definitely has a pregnancy kink. There’s a couple of those “the writer’s poorly disguised fetish” moments in the movie, which honestly got a laugh out of me for how blatant they were. Congrats guys, you got to see Winona Ryder and Jenna Ortega give birth. There’s also an inflation scene, but that only happened once, not twice.

Lydia is shown taking either antidepressants or schizophrenia meds, which her fiancé throws in the trash in like the first scene of the movie which just made me think of that scene in the Fnaf movie where Vanessa throws Mike’s sleeping pills in the lake.

On a similar note, there’s a shot that is more or less frame for frame that scene from the Casper movie where Kat and Casper start levitating while they’re dancing. It even serves basically the same narrative purpose. Seeing it gave me whiplash. You can’t do this to me Tim.

Kind of related to the meta humor, but I got a kick out of how they wrote Jeffery Jones (the actor that played Charles) out of the movie. I mean, they definitely had to, but still. We see Charles’ death through a pretty goofy stop motion segment, and in the afterlife he’s walking around without a head (presumably played/voiced by a different actor). Conversely, the Maitlands (Alec Baldwin and Geena Davis) don’t show up at all. Lydia says that they “found a loophole and were able to pass on” and that’s it. I wish they got a stop motion segment the same way Charles did.

Bob is my goat. He’s very Sir Dan-coded. He did not deserve the fate this movie gave him.

I wouldn’t say I prefer this movie over the original, but my god, it’s leaps and bounds better than all the remakes, reboots, and gap-sequels we’ve been getting for the last ten years. It could’ve benefitted from a tighter script, but in a movie like this that’s not really what matters. It’s dark, it’s funny, it’s charming, it’s memorable. It doesn’t feel forced or corporate the same way that movies like Hocus Pocus 2 or that new Indiana Jones movie do. It’s worth a watch.

[royalsunshinehotel]

may i request nsfw alphabet with napoleon usher?

Napoleon 'Leo' Usher (NSFW Alphabet, 18+)

A/N: I’m writing this after watching Episode Four with @hecuba-of-troy. It’s such a slay, and I love Rahul Kohli so much. This being said, Leo is the worst and I hate him, and I want him. Please enjoy this NSFW alphabet for the worst character ever. 

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex) It’s minimal, if not nonexistent. Leo, after coming in to the Usher family at age 18, was certified at the ‘fuck-and-run’ 

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

I don't think he likes to look close enough at his partners to have a favorite body part. For him, he likes his hands and his hair

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically) He hasn’t got a preference beyond: as much as possible, and everywhere. Cleaning up after is usually a multi-step process. 

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) There was definitely a time in his life when he had a spreadsheet of everyone he’d done sexual activities with. Yes, it is now deleted because he’s become more confident in himself in his thirties. Is it always warranted? Who’s to say. Is the spreadsheet now deleted? Yeah, and he’ll deny it ever existed. 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?) Oh he’s a certified slut. He knows what he needs to do to ‘maintain his reputation’, and he’s probably going to do it. 

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying) He’s a big fan of his partners either being on top, or being on all fours. He’s pretty tall, so whatever’s best for his upper back that day is usually what makes the choice. 

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.) I think he tries to keep it minimal, because goofiness can lead to Intimacy and he can't have that. If he cracks a joke, you’ll laugh and then what !!! chaos (See I) 

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) I seriously think it matches his fuck ass haircut. Like short on the sides long on the middle. I don’t know hair growth patterns down there, but you get the idea. 

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect) I feel like he’s capable of it, but he’ll have to dump you immediately after. It’s something he actively has to tamp down in the name of getting off. 

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon) A whole lot. 3x daily I fear. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks) There's no way he’s having a fucking ass stupid ass haircut like that if you’re not the one pulling on it. Fucking fuck ass shaved sides fuckboy. Like I don’t know what that style is called, but it’s right there next to ‘fuck ass bob’. 

Next after that, I think he’s really into lite bondage. Just being tied up and used by you, which you’re happy to do. 

L = Location (favorite places to do the do) Typically at home, but if it’s been a to of family drama, he’ll fuck you in his car on the way to/from the family event. Next after that, the two of you get nasty in the shower, and then the bedroom. 

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going) A gust of air? Typically I feel like Leo gets a little bit stuck in his own head, typically in a negative train of thought. That usually does it, but he’ll never let it on. He’ll literally use you to feel Anything, but not That much. Sorry!! He needs therapy!!

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) I feel like choking/ anything to do with pain really, it’s off the table. If there’s one thing about Leo, he would never hurt you on purpose. 

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) Receiving. I’m not gonna say any more than that. 

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) It depends on the mood honestly, fast and rough if he’s had a hard time with his family, but it’s slow and sensual and lazy most other times. 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) IDK why I feel this way, but I don’t think Leo is very into quickies, just because he doesn’t strike me as a man who is good at multitasking. Like if a partner were to initiate sex, it would suddenly be sex-time for sex havers. Whatever he was doing before, would have to be put on hold. 

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) Oh he’s all about it, anything to feel something. I see a lot of fucking on his balcony, perhaps in the bathroom at a cool restaurant. 

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) I think he’s been blessed with a whole lot of stamina, almost alarmingly so. Just picture his partner, exhausted, and Leo just cheesing like :D need a break? 

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) I think he’s got a substantial collection, because he’s a lazy lover and if he can’t pawn the work off on his partner, he’ll pawn it off on a toy. 

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) I think it’s up to his partners to tease. Leo is a bit of a glutton, so I can’t see him knowing how to tease, or tease well. 

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) I know this man’s loud as hell. In canon, he’s a slut who hooks up with his instagram followers. I truly believe he doesn’t care who hears ever, and he’s probably smug and selfish, regardless of his minimal effort. 

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character) I feel like Leo has his hair like that by mistake. It looks kind of like a mistake, like he went on a bender, and woke up with his hair like that. This being the case, he’s big into wearing hats in the winter, because the sides of his head like that.  

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes) He’s a stallion, in his fucking prime. Thank you, god bless. 

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?) As we see on the show, it’s pretty darn high. The two of you are definitely NOT monogamous because I’m betting this man drowns his low self-esteem with a high sex drive. He picks up anything that moves and has sex with it. He’s very much the type to say “i don’t know” when you ask about people in his apartment. 

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) 

I think regardless of him being on his “best behavior” he knocks out almost immediately after. He’s very much the type to just roll over and fall asleep, for better or worse.

[likebreadandwine]

Glad it was worded respectfully enough to warrant such an informative response, lol. It's just one of those cases where another person's experience is so different from my own that I honestly can't help but inquire about it and compare notes, so to speak

The way you described flirting is particularly interesting because, on the one hand, I feel like that's an approach that a lot of us take on the internet. There's a general, mutual understanding that we're all going to be more openly flirty and teasing with each other in kink spaces than we otherwise may be in other contexts, with the added footnote that it probably won't go anywhere beyond that most of the time unless there's mutual interest and actual effort involved (some of us understanding/respecting that more/less than others). And, I think a lot of us do tend to enjoy 'performing' to varying degrees, enjoying "the audience's reaction", as you put it. It's fun to feel a little thrill yourself, but it's just as fun to know you've pushed someone else's buttons too

On the other hand, flirting is often understood as the lead-in to more intimate activities, be they sexual or sensual. Though, in my book, it's hard to find satisfaction in one without the other. Sexual intimacy works for me when there's an understanding that it's supported by sensual and emotional intimacy, otherwise it feels...cheap? Not that sex is cheap or that people who just wanna fuck are lesser creatures in any way, it's just rarely something that I crave on its own because it's not the only thing I crave (even when I'm browsing kinks, I almost always gravitate towards things where two people/characters are really into each other). Likewise, while sensual/emotional intimacy is incredibly important to me, I'm wired in such a way that having no sexual intimacy behind it would be like biting into a burger and finding out that it's only buns with nothing in between. Those buns could be some 10/10 bread, but it's just not a burger without everything in between

So, hearing that a lot of this sort of stays 'surface level' for you is certainly interesting. I'm sorry that the one situation you mentioned ended so poorly (especially since feelings are definitely a lot harder to understand and communicate at that age), but that example does beg the question, have you ever looked into what demisexuality entails and do you think you relate to it in any way?

you're totally spot on re: online kink talk/flirting. we're all a bit more open and teasing here than we might be in other contexts. the confidence I've built here has also translated to my encounters offline—I've become kind of a bold flirt lol.

it sounds like sexual, sensual, and emotional intimacy are all tied together for you, which makes sense! (excellent burger analogy.) they're not linked like that for me.

to address your question: I don't identify with demisexuality, because on those rare occasions I've felt some kind of physical attraction to someone, it was immediate. I felt it the day we met, not after developing an emotional bond.

I used to identify as grey-ace, and I think that label makes a lot of sense for me: I experience some kind of physical attraction, albeit rarely, and I'm clearly pretty involved in this sexual kink space, including actively teasing and encouraging folks. I would say I'm sex-neutral: I'm not really interested but I'm not repulsed either.

so why don't I use it anymore? well, that person I mentioned—that was the most I'd ever been attracted to someone. if we were in the same room, I wanted them to be touching me (and when they did touch me, it was like warmth spreading across my whole body and sparking fireworks under my skin). plus, I was totally in love. we shared hobbies and friends and interests, we had deep conversations, we had good banter. and I still had no interest in having sex with them. not even in fantasy did I want it.

which, to me, suggests I straightforwardly do not experience sexual attraction, and the fastest way to communicate that is just to say that I'm ace. are my feelings nuanced and complicated? totally. but a more specific label isn't going to capture those nuances.

[greatbigbellies]

2023 PREGNANCY KINK ADVENT CALENDAR (DAY 13)

Secret Surrogate: 2nd Trimester.

So today was our last day in the office before we all started working from home, and I cannot tell you how close I have skirted the line hiding this pregnancy. Due to my below average height, I’ve started showing much more than I initially expected to, since the baby has nowhere to grow but out front. I will admit, I may have been playing it a little fast and loose with my diet, and maybe giving into my cravings a little more than I should but… I AM eating for two so I deserve some leniency. It’s predominantly baby weight anyway, it should melt off after I’ve popped…

Regardless, I am rounder, mostly in my tummy but noticeably all over. One of the most inconvenient parts of that is the weather is warming up, and it’s becoming increasingly difficult to justify wearing loose hoodies and sweaters. They have a nice shapelessness to them that makes them invaluable for hiding a pregnant gut but… I mean beyond looking just a little strange still wearing a sweater when its nearly 70 fahrenheit out, I’M starting to feel uncomfortably warm. I can’t articulate how important it is that we all moved to work from home, cause there wasn’t any way I could keep that up.

I’m 25 weeks now, but even going back to about 18 weeks, things started getting harder to keep tucked away. My tummy wasn’t just a convenient little fat pouch but was firm enough and sticking forward enough that it was getting a little too hard to hand wave away. I learned the hard way that loose, big sweaters have to be LONG enough too, which you wouldn’t think would be an issue for me considering how short I am. But, alas, a big yawn and stretch leaves a sliver of tummy skin exposed, and that is VERY risky for me. I haven't developed stretchmarks yet but, I have no doubt they’re on their way. This baby is weighing in slightly heavier than average for being 25 weeks, and a little bigger too. Nothing to worry about health wise, but the doctor says that it can be “indicative of more prominent growth later in the pregnancy”. I may be cautiously safe since we don’t return to the office until AFTER my due date, but every inch I gain now is one I have to whittle off later.

Still, things have been pretty good otherwise. My friend has been so supportive and doting. She’s adamant that my involvement warrants special treatment, since, in her words, I’m “going above and beyond to help her start her family”. Sometimes I wonder if she forgets how long we’ve been friends and how ride or die I am for her. I know she’d do the same for me. Still, she insists on taking me to regular lunches, and she’s bought me some VERY high end cocoa butter to rub on my tummy (It smells amazing I might use this stuff even when I’m NOT pregnant). She’s even offered to take me maternity clothes shopping when the time comes, and I might take her up on it because that day is rapidly approaching.

It’s honestly really sweet though, how much she’ll dote on me… it kind of takes me back to when we were sweet on each other in college. We ended up mutually rolling it back after a few months. We loved each other a lot but, we worked better as friends. Still, having her buy me food and gifts and rub my pregnant tummy now, reminds me of when she’d take me on dates and do little surprises for me, and give me back rubs when we were together. She’s just always been very sweet. It’s cute the way she praises how much her baby is growing but almost immediately rolls it back for fear of offending me, because if her baby is bigger, so am I. I appreciate her concern but my body image is honestly the best it’s been in years.

I can’t say I strictly dislike the changes I’m experiencing, actually… if it wasn’t for the work drama, I think I’d honestly lean into it a bit? My hips are widening, tummy is bigger, I can definitely feel my thighs have MORE to them. Once I’m done, I might not even stress too much about taking the weight off. Being out of the office for almost 5 months is a reasonable time to gain weight, who is to say the sedentary lifestyle of working out of a bedroom office didn’t have its effects? I guess what I’m saying is, if it wasn’t for outside pressures, I’d have no shame showing off this pregnancy. I’m doing something amazing helping someone I love, and it’s something I should be proud of.

That has easily been my biggest struggle with everything, the tension between feeling proud of my pregnancy and what I’m doing, and the forced hesitation I need to have at the idea of showing it off. Or, honestly, not even showing it off so much as existing with is as a visible factor. We’ve had pregnant coworkers around the office before, hell, one of the ladies in HR pops out a kid every other year for crying out loud… but she’s MARRIED. If you’re hitched you’re fine, no one bats an eye… but god forbid someone have a baby outside of marriage.

Ugh, I’m ranting too much. Or maybe I’m not ranting enough? Either way, I’m out of the office now. If I have a zoom meeting I’ll just keep the camera tilted up so I’m only in the frame chest up, the hard part of keeping it covert is over. Now’s just… the hard part of carrying a baby.

[algolagniaa]

random thoughts about spirituality and sadomasochism

I’ve always been drawn towards hippie dippie new age peace and love and light and unity and we’re all connected and communing with nature type of spirituality, but I’ve never fully been able to embody that energy in large part because whenever i try it has felt like I’m faking it. reasons it feels like I’m faking it are 1) lack of empathy 2) wanting to kill people/liking hurting people sometimes and 3) EXTREME MASOCHISM, to the point where it’s actually gotten in the way of relationships even when I was actively trying to “heal” my sexuality. and I’ve always felt like those 3 things were keeping me from being the spiritual being I wanted to be. a few weeks ago I went to a meditation retreat where I did some healing around that (basically realized faeries are very far from beings of pure goodness so there’s no reason I need to be) however it wasn’t until my experience on Monday that it clicked for me how these things - and sadomasochism specifically - actually fit with the whole connection thing very well.

my view on spirituality/magic/the nature of the universe has always been: everything is part of a larger whole. studying biology rn is REALLY backing me up on this honestly. even atoms have a structure where lots of smaller parts come together to make a whole, cells have a structure where lots of smaller parts come together, the human body has this, society has this, the ecosystem, the solar system….. no matter how much you zoom in or out you will see lots of beings, both living and not, working together (consciously or not) for a collective purpose. problems with human society nonwithstanding, we are all meant to fill a role in the larger universe that involves connection with the rest of the world. if you’ve read any tumblr posts I’ve made ever you know that this is something I have always found very difficult. however I HAVE always found connection through sadomasochism, as much as people wanna tell me that it’s only hurting me (and I do see their point) it’s always been something beyond PURELY sexual for me. I mean it is still very sexual obviously. but I also experience it as like….. an opening up and giving all of myself to someone. complete surrender, dropping all acts and putting all walls down, just existing in the moment and feeling and hurting and allowing myself to be vulnerable with someone else and knowing that this person WILL hurt me and inviting it and delighting in it (more on this later) instead of trying to prevent it. that’s not to say that every sadist receives it this way (one of the reasons I have trouble dating) but it is why I have found it impossible to just stop having a kink.

when I first astral projected I told many people (really only 3 plus all of tumblr which doesn’t count, but whatever) that I was God. and that wasn’t wrong exactly but having some time to think about it (and not being on mushrooms anymore lmao) it wasn’t exactly right either. what I experienced was a perfect union with God. a knowledge that we are made of the same stuff and that she (I very much experienced God as a she) loves me deeply. my soul left my body and joined God in another dimension that I will not be trying to describe here because it’s absolutely indescribable, I’ve already tried and words fail me, but first I very much experienced God “cracking” me open and letting my soul out, and honestly in the moment I thought about the girl I’ve been excited about lately and I thought about vivisection and torture. and it all clicked together that actually my longing for that and my longing for spiritual experience are one and the same, or at least not so far apart as I had thought.

then the experience of being in that dimension was so much. I can’t even tell it in a linear way because so much up there was not linear. I don’t think time really existed? but one thing that happened is I SAW how the cycle of life and death works in a way I’d never seen it before. without a living body I got a new appreciation for everything living bodies do, is the best I can say it, and that appreciation extended to every part of life - even the gross shit. and I came to understand death, too, as not an end but simply another part of a living creature’s life cycle. this is something I already thought intellectually but never understood in the same way. and I could’ve stayed in this dimension forever but I realized I didn’t want to. it is where I belong and I’m going to go back there at some point. but I’m human right now and I want to keep being human. and I think the reason im even here is to experience exactly what it is to be human, and to live life and experience pleasure and pain and eventually die. I am here to get the entire human experience and I want all of it, including the parts that suck or are gross or intense or painful or scary for other people, because when I’m not human anymore I won’t get to have any of it. pain IS a pleasurable sensation for me because it means that I’m feeling, and I want to feel everything.

the lack of empathy makes more sense now too but I’m not going to go into that too deeply because it sounds cuckoo bananas even compared to the rest of this essay. but I will say that I think wanting to know what it is to be human is the same reason behind wanting to hurt people. it’s the same reason I like psychological experiments, on both me and others. I want to see what makes people tick. I want to see who they are with all pretenses dropped, same as I want to experience the same myself. the other reason is ofc the libran desire to make things even but I’ve actually felt so much less of that since coming back into my body. I think I did actually genuinely gain empathy or at least a lot more understanding for the people who have hurt me in my life.

also not quite related but everything is so much less boring now. I still feel detached and disconnected from everything but it is FAR less, and much easier to make myself connect when I want to.

[gurugirl]

okay... let's dissect chapter 3 of a balancing act.

harry is pushy but he is in love. he's gonna go and get the girl and make her his and he did. problematic? nahhh... ha ha! i actually love that he interrupted the date (in the last chapter) and wants her with him on tour.

then there's the fact that yn's husband died. she must have so much trauma from that and it made me feel so upset for her. she's been dealing with it for a while and the first man that catches her interest after all this time is harry styles as she deserves.

i love how harry took the news. it felts so realistic. like they were gonna go and bang but then he was like.. whoa, let's let this info settle for a bit and take it from there. He needed a minute to wrap his mind around it.

but then the smut once things calmed and he still couldn't resist her. the way he showed her everything and talked her through it.

I'll admit, i've never heard of bondage tape, nor did I know clamps could be adjusted but I so much appreciate your details there and feels like harry was giving her all these little pieces of what was to come. slowly introducing her to the rougher stuff. letting her choose how tight the clamps were and using tape that wouldn't stick to her skin and hair.

and i'm such a big fan of anal sex. my husband and I get around to doing it about once a month and the feeling of it is just as you describe. my mouth was watering when I read that and I'm gonna ask him to fuck my ass tonight because that got me so hot. sorry if that's tmi, but I'm not kidding you 😂

but i especially loved that way you described how she felt when he was doing these things to her and using the clamps. your style of writing is so engaging and I can almost feel what you're explaining. now I want to try having my nipples clamped. because I so relate to yn's nipples being sensitive and sore so it gives me pause when I see things like that but the way she began to enjoy it and feel the arousal from that was so hot.

also huge massive fan of daddy kink stuff and I really can appreciate how these two go about it. harry is pretty straightforward in telling yn what he likes and she's trying to just remember to call him daddy because she's never done it before. i love that! i love that she isn't just simply suddenly calling him daddy with ease. you make it so real, guru.

so then of course he has to punish her when she keeps forgetting to "address him properly" 🤣 and that is just so up my ally. i fucking love that part. and I love how they are together.

i also love that she's plus-sized and Harry loves her body and all the praise he gives her.

I can't wait to see what happens in the final chapter. i feel like we still have so much to explore with these two so it feels like it's going to be packed with some interesting details. I'm so excited! But also bummed that it's going to be the end.

thank you for your phenomenal writing!

I waited a bit to post this because of all the spoilers but I think it's time now to release to the public 🤣

First of all, thank you for taking the time to write all of this. You've gone above and beyond here and I very much appreciate your thoughts.

I'm so happy you liked this and that you're excited about what's to come. Yes, the final chapter is going to be packed with lots of emotions but I think you'll enjoy it if you've gotten this far in the story.

Your feedback is amazing. Thank you so much for this and I love that you've been paying attention to the story (that means the most to me honestly).

xoxo

[dyhayc]

A Polaroid Is Worth A Thousand Words

Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!Reader (Fluff, Humour, Smut)

Summary: It’s summer break! You, your boyfriend, and your friends go on a road trip to meet with the Byers in California. Chaos ensues

Word Count: 7.9k

Warnings: Self-esteem issues/previous negative body image, MDNI 18+, explicit consent, protected sex, innocence kink, corruption kink, praise kink, a little dumbification, a little hand kink, a little oral fixation, a hint of temperature play, a hint of a choking kink, fingering, piv penetration, semi-public sex, virgin!reader, blatant misuse of a popsicle

A/N: I was inspired to write this because I had to pack for my vacation to a beach area. I know this is pretty divergent from my regular stuff. I try to write fluff only (and honestly this is my first time writing anything nsfw) but I’ve been thinking about this specific scenario a lot and I had a long plane ride so… yea. The intrusive horny thoughts won today

Also most of this was written pre-part 2 so I’m just gonna ignore cannon lmao. I actually haven’t watched it yet (I made the mistake of opening Tumblr because I forgot it was July 1st and instantly saw a spoiler, so I’m aware of… things). This can be considered an AU because I know that it doesn’t match up with s4 pt2 at all

The last sentence is a gift for all the people who miss Eddie

Light wash or dark wash? A dilemma that has taken twenty precious minutes from your life. Space in your luggage is limited, and you’re too indecisive to make a choice. Which pair of jeans to bring isn’t the first tough fashion decision you’ve had to make tonight. Over half of your closet is scattered around you. Clothes on hangers struggle to grip onto every ledge available in your room.

Typically, you’d pick the most comfortable clothes from your closet and call it a day, but you and Eddie made a deal. He’d told you that if ‘86 was his year, it would be yours too. At first, you pretended not to know what he was talking about, but he’d just raised his eyebrow, and you knew he knew.

High school had caused a lot of insecurities about your body, mainly because of your “friends” who were catty at best and downright rude at worst. Every day, they’d rate each other’s outfits. However, when it came to you, they always commented about your body rather than your clothes. There had never been a day where you’d felt comfortable in your skin. Getting together with Eddie was one of the best things to happen to you. He helped you to gain your confidence back after years of suppression. He’d always gone out of his way to help you; it was how you’d met.

It was dark that night. The grey storm clouds looming over Hawkins threatened to release a torrent of rain at a moment's notice. They’d been around for days, intimidating but never actually storming. Unfortunately, luck was not on your side. The rain was predicted to pour the night of your graduation.

Even though graduating is a momentous occasion, the ceremony was boring beyond belief. The school had been too cheap to rent a venue, so the entire class of ‘85 and the accompanying families were squeezed into the gym. The speeches were shallow, it smelled like homecoming, Tammy Thompson performed a horrendous rendition of your class song, and to top it all off: you didn’t even get your diploma, just the holder. Everyone had to return with an ID the next day to get the real thing.

Afterward, you were dying to get home, but your friends wanted to attend some grad party. And by “grad party,” they meant going to an abandoned barn and getting shitfaced with half the class. Parties had never been your thing, much less one where everyone would be so fucked up. Maybe you were naive and wanted to believe your friends cared about you, but you didn’t expect them to be so upset that you didn’t want to go.

Thinking you would be hanging out with your friends, your family had left. To make matters worse, it was sprinkling meaning the storm had finally started. If you walked home, the rain would only fall harder, meaning you would get soaked. You asked your friends to drop you off at home, but they said, “The only place we’re going is the party. You’re either coming with, or you’re walking.”

You walked.

Down the jagged streets, you trekked for a few blocks. It was miserable. Your heels hurt your feet, but there was no way you’d walk through the muck and debris barefooted. Your robes were massive, inconvenient, and so thin the wind blew right through you. You were right about the rain. Effectively soaked, you were sure you’d be sick the next day. The disappointment got to you. What was supposed to be a happy day felt impossibly terrible. Sniffling, you weren’t sure if the water on your face was tears or raindrops.

A pair of headlights blinded you, so you raised your arm over your eyes to block the brightness. Brakes screech as the vehicle comes to a stop. Lowering your arm, you see the driver’s side window roll down. Inside is someone you never expected: Eddie Munson.

He seems as confused as you but leans out the window to shout over the wind, “Need a ride?” Considering your options, walk home and potentially get frostbite or ride in a van safe from the rain, you chose the van. Thinking back, it was stupid to trust a man in a van offering to drive you home in the middle of the night, but in the moment, the thought that he may be dangerous hadn’t even crossed your mind.

Running across the street, you open the door and put your soaked cap and holder into the van. Thank goodness they hadn’t given you your actual diploma; it would’ve been ruined in the storm. You unzip the gown, shimmy out of the thin, itchy fabric, and then sit in his passenger seat and shut the door. Embarrassed about the massive wet spot you’re going to leave, you mutter shyly, “Sorry about your seats, Eddie.”

You realize too late you’ve used his name, despite never talking to him before, but he didn’t seem to notice. Instead, he was distracted by the beautiful and, quite frankly, fancy dress you wore underneath your gown. So distracted, he took a second too long to respond, “It’s fine. This van has seen worse.” Unsure of what he means, you don’t reply and buckle your seat belt. He continues, “So, where are you headed? The party is the other way, y’know.”

You wrinkle your nose as tears gather in your eyes again. Vigorously shaking your head, you declare, “I wanna go home.” His eyes soften when you tack on a weak “please,” to your request.

He nods, “Of course. Where do you live?” You notice how his tone becomes gentler, his energy lowering to match your mood. He accommodates you effortlessly, but the thought only hurts your heart, knowing your friends would never do that for you. Hearing your address, he pulls a u-turn and drives toward your house.

You’re both silent, but he keeps glancing at you. Finally, he voices the words he’d been holding back, “Are you okay?” There’s hesitance in his voice as if he doesn’t know whether or not the question will break the relatively calm air of the ride. You genuinely consider ignoring him for a moment before deciding that would be incredibly rude.

Fidgeting with your fingers, you attempt to summarize your night, “I just- Well, after graduating, my friends wanted to go to the party, but I didn’t. I don’t know why they got mad. I guess they didn’t want to drive over to my house cause it’s out of the way. I live far from school, so I kinda get it, I guess.” You couldn’t help but make excuses for them. You didn’t know any better.

Though you couldn’t, Eddie recognized how toxic your friends were and pointed it out, “Sounds like you have shitty friends. A real friend would’ve driven you anywhere you wanted.” You stare at your feet. Deep down, you’ve always known your friends weren’t good for you, but they were comfortable, familiar. He just voices the thoughts you’ve been too scared to acknowledge yourself.

Internally, you rewatch every moment they’d treated you poorly, every time they’d disregarded your feelings, every time they’d been… shitty. “You’re right,” you say softly before laughing in disbelief and repeating louder, “you’re right. They are shitty friends. I can’t believe I didn’t know.” Turning to look at him, you smile, “Thank you.”

He seems baffled at your sudden realization, unsure if you’re being serious, but he still smiles back. “Y’know,” he offers, “Since you’re now friendless, you’re gonna need new friends.” Your eyes widen in alarm. How could you forget? Seeing your panic, he quickly adds, “Maybe I could be your friend?”

Insecurities bubble in your chest, and you question, “But what if you don’t like me? Like, when you get to know me?” Right as you voice your concerns, he pulls up to your house. Parking in front of your home, he unbuckles his seatbelt and turns in his seat.

“Why don’t we get to know each other right now? I have nowhere else to be.” Almost six months later, you’d found out that he had somewhere else to be: the party. He was planning on making bank from the drunk graduates who wanted to party hard. The funds he could’ve gotten probably would’ve paid for two or three months’ rent.

You agreed to chat, excited he wanted to talk to you. Both of you had stayed up for hours talking about anything and everything. You’d only left because you got so tired your eyelids wouldn’t stay open. For the next few months, you saw Eddie around a lot. You also met your new best friends, Steve and Robin, during that time. Working at Scoops-Ahoy was a fun, positive experience. It was even more exciting when Eddie would visit you, though Steve and Robin teased you endlessly for it. At least, it was fun until the “mall fire,” when you experienced the horrors of the Upside Down for the first time.

When news spread about the disaster, Eddie spent hours searching for you. When you’d finally been reunited, he’d confessed that the experience made him realize he couldn’t deal with the idea of losing you. At first, you were confused and thought he was trying to break off your friendship, but he realized you didn’t understand and told you point-blank he wanted to be your boyfriend. You were ecstatic and rushed to let your friends know about your new relationship. They had been excited for you, though Robin and Steve told Eddie privately that if he hurt you, he’d be in deep shit.

Your first date had been perfect. He took you to a park for a picnic. His cooking skills were… subpar, but it’s the thought that counts, and he had obviously tried very hard to please you. And, if that wasn’t enough, he gave you a polaroid camera. He said it was because he wanted to capture every beautiful moment with you. Your teasing about his cheesiness was to cover the way your heart swooned at how sweet he was.

Smiling at the memory, you search through your things to get the camera. Finding it in your dresser drawer, you grab a bunch of extra film and some colourful markers to shove in your backpack. Even though you’ve successfully packed a few items, there’s still the wardrobe dilemma left. With a groan, you return to your jeans and begin the internal debate again.

It takes a few hours of sorting and a break to eat dinner, but you’ve finally chosen all the clothes you want to bring. Now, all that’s left is your swimsuits. You grab a one-piece to be conservative, though it’s not your style. Going back in, you pull out a few mismatched high-waisted bottoms and bikini tops. Putting those away, you move to shut your drawer but hesitate.

Last summer, you were heading to work when you saw the cutest bikini set in the window of a store. It had a strawberry print and frilly detailing with ties on the top and bottom to adjust the size. That swimsuit haunted your thoughts your entire shift, so when you headed home for the day, you bought it. You were at the peak of your negative self-image then, so you never wore the bikini out. It was pretty, but it drew attention to insecurities you hadn’t felt comfortable showing in public.

You’re still not sure if you have the confidence to wear it, but your promise to Eddie makes you bring it anyway. If this is supposed to be your year, you want to wear your favourite bikini. And, if you have doubts, you can probably ask Robin what she thinks? She wouldn’t lie to you.

Content with everything in your luggage, you head to bed and mentally prepare to be stuck in a car with Dustin for hours. You love him like a little brother, but he does not do well when he can’t move around.

You slept in a little that morning, getting up at ten. Sitting in a car is oddly tiring, so you’ll definitely need that extra rest. Gathering up your luggage, you move it to your door. Everyone agreed to meet at your house, so you can chill in the kitchen until noon. You know they’re not going to arrive when they said they would.

Though you love him, Eddie is a hot mess who arrives at least fifteen minutes late to every event. He calls it “fashionably late,” and you agree, but for different reasons: he can’t decide what accessories to wear, so he’s never on time. Steve always wakes up late but still insists on doing his perfect hairstyle. Robin is just a disaster who can’t stick to a schedule to save her life. You adore your friends, but you also tell them to come an hour before you expect them to arrive. That way, they’re on time even if they’re running behind (and all of them always are). It doesn’t help that they’re picking up people today, which adds even more time to their arrivals.

It’s 12:26 when you hear Eddie’s favourite band faintly through your walls. Walking to the door to greet him, you lean against the pillar on your porch to watch his van pull up. You can hear Eddie bickering with Lucas and Max from your spot fifteen feet away. The second the van stops, Mike jumps out and walks towards you. “Hey,” you greet, “Fighting already?”

He rolls his eyes and replies ‘yea’ in an annoyed tone but doesn’t elaborate on the issue further. He makes a beeline for your kitchen, leaving you outside alone. Eddie is the next to go, and you watch him slam the car door aggressively before lighting up when he notices you on the porch. He throws his arms up into the air and exclaims, “My angel!” as he comes closer. He moves his outstretched hands to cup your face and whispers, “How did I get so lucky?”

You giggle, flustered, and mumble, “I think I’m the lucky one.”

He shakes his head and responds, “Wrong!” Before you can refute him, he leans in to kiss you. You reciprocate the kiss and wrap your arms around his waist to draw him closer. Both of you are too preoccupied to notice the other two kids, Lucas and Max, getting out of the van too.

Max passes you both without a word, but Lucas wrinkles his nose and makes it a point to comment, “Gross. Get a room,” as he goes into your home.

Eddie pulls away and yells after Lucas, “Be careful what you wish for. She lives here y’know!” Lucas groans, and you can hear him complaining to Mike and Max in your kitchen. You’ve never had sex before, mainly because you wanted to feel more confident in your body before doing something so intimate, but regardless, the threat is meaningless. Though, Lucas doesn’t know that. You laugh at your boyfriend, and he looks at you with his pretty doe eyes, currently filled with mischief, “What?”

Amused, you just shake your head and slip out of his grasp. Walking inside, you remember your luggage and turn around. Moving it all to the doorway, you clasp your hands and give him a little pout, “Will you help me?”

He laughs at your antics and starts grabbing your bags, “You didn’t have to pout to get my help, baby.”

Kissing his cheek, you thank him with a grin. While he’s stuffing your things in the back of his van, Steve pulls up. Robin rolls down the side window when you walk up. You greet them and get a chorus of hellos in return. Leaning your forearms on the car door, you tell Dustin the others are inside, so he runs off to talk to his friends. “Hi, Nance! I haven’t seen you in a while.”

Moving her head so she can see you, she smiles and replies, “Yea, it has been a while.” In high school, you ran in parallel social circles. Occasionally, you’d talk, but it wasn’t typical. After everything that happened with the Upside Down, you got closer. Last night, she’d slept over at Robin’s place, where you would’ve been too if you hadn’t procrastinated on packing.

Robin points out, “You’ll be stuck in a car together for a few hours. There’s plenty of time to catch up.”

Dramatically, you sigh and pout, “I wish you could be with us too, Rob.” Reaching into the car, you rest your hand on her shoulder and give Steve puppy eyes.

He cuts in, unamused, “No. I am not gonna be stuck babysitting again.” He points his finger at you, “If you wanna talk to Robin, you’ll have to sit in my car.”

Though you knew he was gonna say that, you still sigh and pat Robin’s shoulder, “Sorry, best friend.” Moving out of their way, they all get out of Steve’s car and disperse. You watch them go inside as Eddie comes up next to you. Grabbing his hand, you tug him towards your house, “C’mon, we gotta call Ms. Byers.”

When planning your trip, you agreed to call Joyce before you left. She wanted to make sure she’d have space ready for all of you to sleep. You’d tried to tell her you’d get rooms at a motel or hotel, but she’d insisted on letting you stay. She’d said it would be too expensive, and, honestly? She was right.

Everyone is in the kitchen area hanging out and chatting, so you go straight to the phone and call your friends in California. Jonathan picks up the line and slurs, “Uh, hello?” It’s obvious he had been asleep moments before. You tell him it’s you, and he responds, “Are you guys heading out now?”

You’re about to reply when Dustin comes up and asks to say something. You tell him it’s not Will on the phone, but all the teens have crowded around, expecting to speak to him. Relinquishing control, you let them do whatever it is they do. You learned early on that it’s best to just get out of the way.

Checking in with the rest of the group, you offer snacks and water if they forgot to pack anything. Everyone seems to be content with their things, though, so you just get water for yourself and Eddie. You know he’ll forget them if you put them on the counter, so you hand him both bottles. He radiates warmth that draws you in, you can’t resist leaning against his side. Glancing up, you see him softly smiling down at you, so you return it in kind.

Mike hangs up the receiver loudly, getting everyone’s attention. “They know we’re coming,” he announces, “We should leave now.” Desperation bleeds through his voice, obviously eager to get to El. You agree and usher everyone out of your kitchen. Heading out to the cars, the group splits into two. Going with Eddie is you, Dustin, and Nancy. Following Steve is Robin, Mike, Lucas, and Max. Ironically, Steve is taking more people even though he has the smaller car, but it had taken a long fight to get to these positions in the first place.

There had been quite a few rules put in place that limited the placements of people:

1. You’re riding with Eddie (that was non-negotiable)

2. Nancy didn’t want to be in the same car as Mike

3. Dustin insisted he be put with you and Eddie

4. Steve threatened not to come if he was put in a car with only younger teens

5. Lucas and Max requested to sit next to each other

The battle had been brutal, taking over two hours. Luckily, you’d been able to make seating arrangements that pleased everyone. People disperse to their respective rides as you slide into Eddie’s passenger seat, putting your backpack between your feet on the floor. The second he turns on the van, you lower the volume. Dustin leans forward with his walkie in hand, “We’re Eagle One. Steve’s car is Eagle Two.”

“When did we decide that?” you ask, confused.

He responds, “In the kitchen,” before turning on the walkie to talk to the other car, “Eagle Two, this is Eagle One, come in.”

Mike’s filtered voice comes through, sounding agitated, “No way. We’re Eagle One, you’re Eagle Two.”

Recognizing the beginning of a fight, you snatch the walkie out of his hand to break it up, “Dustin used Eagle One first, we call dibs.” You turn down the volume and toss it back to Dustin, who leans back in his seat and listens to what Lucas and Mike are saying.

Eddie glances over and chuckles, “Didn’t expect you to side with Henderson, babe.”

You stick your tongue out at him and jokingly say, “I have to throw him a bone sometimes, Eds.” Dustin exclaims indignantly in the background, but you ignore him. Nancy finally makes her way to the van, so you ask, “Everybody here? Are we ready to go?”

Eddie does a head count, though you only have four people, while Dustin calls over to the other car to check they have all their passengers. Confident you won’t leave anyone behind, Eddie pulls out, and Steve follows. Earlier in the week, your friends gathered any relevant maps they had for the trip. You volunteered to be the navigator, so they were all given to you. The route is pretty simple, though. The hardest part of your trip will be finding places to sleep.

The Hawkins scenery passes by for the first fifteen minutes until you merge onto I-80 West. From there, just follow the highway until you arrive in California. The drive should take about 35 hours, split into three to four days, depending on how much driving is done each day.

Watching grass and trees out your window gets old quickly, so you catch up with Nancy. She rests her elbows on the center console while you’re turned in your seat so you can talk closer together. After a while, you’re both gossiping instead, giggling at stupid rumours about Steve. Eddie seems to enjoy them and says he’ll remember to tease Steve about them later.

Both cars need gas, so you take a pit stop. Hopping out, you walk in circles to stretch your legs. Robin joins you and complains about Steve’s music choices. Teasing her, you laugh, “You’re in the loser car. What did you expect?” She glares and jokingly pushes you out of the way to walk inside the store.

Trailing behind Robin, you beg her to buy you an Icee. To your surprise, she does. You thank her endlessly, excited to drink it. Taking it back to the van, you show the slushie off and tell Eddie that Robin bought it for you. He jokes, “Is Robin your sugar mommy now?”

You stick your Icee-stained tongue out at him, and he takes a picture. You’re thrown off for a moment. You didn’t know he took the polaroid camera out of your bag. Huffing, you set down your Icee and try to steal the photo from his hands. He has much longer arms than you, so it doesn’t work out. Sitting back, you whine, “Why do you even want it, Eddie? I brought my camera to take exciting pictures.”

He laughs at your desperation to get the polaroid back and hits your forehead with it, “Every moment with you is exciting, sweetheart.”

The moment is ruined abruptly. “Why are you two being so lovey-dovey?” Mike questions as he settles in where Nancy had been sitting.

You counter, “Why are you being so dumb?” as you snatch the polaroid from Eddie’s hands. The developed picture turned out surprisingly well, so you decide to keep it.

“You’re not the Wheeler I expected,” Eddie comments dryly, also annoyed at the ruined atmosphere. Mike explains that Nancy asked to switch until the next pit stop; you all leave it at that. The last one to arrive, Dustin hops in with a bag of chips, and you’re on the road again.

Instead of listening to Eddie’s mixtapes, you turn on the radio this time. Flipping through channels, you settle on a random choice. There isn’t much of a selection out in rural Indiana. It gets warm in the car, but the breeze feels fantastic when you lower the windows. You all sit in silence as the smell of dry grass and humidity fills your lungs. The wind is so loud it drowns out the radio, but you don’t mind.

A new song starts, and from what you can hear, it sounds familiar. Turning it up, you realize it’s Mamma Mia, and you crank the volume higher. Laughing in delight, you sing along loudly to the lyrics. To your surprise, Eddie sings too. Dustin says something, but you can’t hear it, and you're definitely not gonna stop singing just to hear his most-likely cynical remark.

He gives up trying to convey what he was saying, instead turning up the volume on the walkie. To your surprise, you can hear Robin and Nancy singing along with you from the other car. The song is over, but everyone’s energy is still high. Rolling up your window, you listen to the group singing along with the radio, occasionally joining in when you recognize a song.

The time passes quickly with the new distraction, and soon enough, you’re at the second pit stop. Steve needed to go to the bathroom, so you found the nearest rest stop. Even though it’s going to be quick, you ask Eddie to photograph you underneath a huge tree. He gets one polaroid before Nancy notices and asks if you want her to take a photo of you both. Posing together, she snaps a picture of you and hands back the camera.

When Steve comes out of the restroom, you get an idea and have Eddie ask a stranger to take a photo of your entire group together. Corralling everyone together is a difficult task, only matched by trying to get them to pose for the camera. The end result is worth it, though, the picture is cute, and everyone looks great.

When you return to the cars, Dustin and Mike switch out for Robin and Nancy. Dustin makes it a point for you to be cautious with his walkie as he passes it, claiming, “with great power comes great responsibility.” You promise him you’ll keep it safe as you take it.

Steve is pissed that he’s “stuck babysitting” even though he threatened to ditch if that happened, but Eddie reminds him he’s too far to go back. Aggravated, Steve hisses at the teens to get in the car as he grumbles under his breath. Part of you feels bad, but another part is happy to finally hang out with Robin.

The ensuing conversation is chaotic. Most of your time is spent arguing about stupid things that don’t matter, but you’re grateful because they fill the time. Robin tried to walkie Steve once, wanting to include him in the conversation, but he was still mad, so he ghosted her.

It’s around 9:30 when you stop at a motel for the night. Anyone who has an income helps to pay for the two rooms. Sorting out luggage, Eddie takes both of yours to the room. You two get a bed, Nancy and Robin get the second, and Steve gets the couch. There’s a line for the shower, so you check up on the younger teens. They’re just watching some stupid horror movie, sprawled out randomly on the two beds. Deciding they’re fine, you tease them, “Don’t get nightmares,” before returning to your room.

The water is freezing, so you shower and brush your teeth quickly. You dress in your typical pajamas, one of Eddie’s t-shirts and a pair of shorts. Your movements are sluggish, the tiredness hitting you suddenly. Reaching your bed, you flop down onto the mattress. Eddie’s the last to shower, so you warn him the water’s cold as he walks away. The alarm clock next to the bed glares 10:13 in bright red lettering.

Huffing, you sit up and crawl under the sheets to try and get comfortable. Steve and Robin are already knocked out, but Nancy is still awake. She has the lamp on as she reads a book, but you’re glad for the light. After everything in Hawkins, you have to admit you’re afraid of the dark.

Eddie finishes his shower fast, dumping his towel in a random spot on the floor. You struggle to keep your eyes open as he lies down on his back next to you. Wiggling around, you find a comfortable position resting your face in the crook of his neck. He smells like the cheap bar soap the motel provides, but you still detect a hint of his usual scent underneath. He kisses the side of your head and mumbles, “Good night, sleepyhead,” into your hair. You fumble some words out that vaguely sound like ‘g’night.’

The following two days go relatively the same. The seating arrangements shuffle around slightly, you drive for about three hours, stop at a rest stop, sight-seeing spot, or gas station, take a few pictures, then repeat. When you get bored, you label and decorate your polaroids. You bought a photo album a few weeks ago to hold all the polaroids from the trip.

On the fourth day, you finally make it to the Byers house. It’s almost three am, so everyone just sleeps and agrees to talk tomorrow. You’re the first to wake up, apart from Joyce. The smell of pancakes leads you to the kitchen, where she’s making breakfast. “Good morning,” you say, rubbing your eyes.

She jumps, not realizing you were there, “Oh! Good morning.” Embarrassed, you apologize before asking if there’s anything you can help with. Food is scattered around the counters, and she appears to be having trouble making a meal for so many people. She motions to a cupboard full of pots and pans, “Can you cook some bacon, please? Thank you so much.”

Together, you make bacon, fried eggs, scrambled eggs, pancakes, Eggo waffles (for El), toast, and apple slices. While cooking, the topic of conversation is grim. You’re both recounting your experiences with the Upside Down and all the other terrible shit that happens in Hawkins. You’re grateful for her insight. She has a lot more experience with murderous monsters than you.

The more people that come in, the more chaotic the kitchen becomes. People snatch items from plates and fight to get food first. You’re surprised, but Joyce looks resigned, like she expected it. When El comes down, you give her the dish of Eggos made specifically for her, and she smiles at you. Observing the scramble for food, you decide to wait until everyone’s done before getting some yourself.

“So, what are you guys planning to do today?” Joyce asks, eating some toast. She has to work since it’s Friday, but tomorrow she’ll be able to hang out with you guys too.

“We’re gonna go to the beach for a few hours,” Jonathan informs her.

Lucas admits he’s never been to the beach before, and Max says, “It’s nothing special. Just sand, water, and trash.” That statement sparks an argument about beaches that you’re desperate to get away from. Pulling Robin out of her chair, you bring her to the spare bedroom where everyone’s luggage is. You pull out the bikini, change into it, and ask her if it’s too much.

She laughs in shock and says, “Too much? It’s perfect. Eddie will love it.” Then, she mischievously nudges your side and adds, “It’s sexy. He’ll love it. If you know what I mean.” She raises her eyebrows to emphasize her point and you push her out the door. Her words still give you confidence, so you put a sundress over your bikini and leave the room.

Once everyone gets dressed, you all head to the beach. For convenience, you park next to each other and open the trunks. Grabbing canopies, towels, bags, and coolers, each person brings something down to the sand. You help Steve set up an umbrella so Robin and Eddie can sit with you.

The sun is burning hot on your back so you peel off the sundress and leave it in your bag. Though you don’t notice, Eddie’s eyes are glued to you. His breath hitches at the view of your ass when you bend down. He’s never seen you wear such a revealing bikini before. The simple sight of your exposed skin makes his heart pound.

Jonathan has a cooler of drinks and popsicles that he’s offering to the kids. You ask for a coconut popsicle, and Lucas tosses one to you. Right after you start to eat it, you realize you left your sunscreen in the van. Letting Robin and Steve know where you’re going, you head towards the parking lot.

Eddie showed you a trick to open his van’s door without the key. There’s a dent in the door that will release the lock if hit hard enough. You’re about to attempt it when two hands rest on your hips. Scared, you jump and whip around, only to find Eddie behind you. He laughs as you angrily glare at him. “Sorry baby,” he says softly, kissing your cheek. His hair tickles your nose and you giggle, accepting his apology.

He holds up his keys and opens the door for you. Or at least, that’s what you assumed he was doing. Instead, he reaches inside, himself, and grabs the camera. You know he’s going to ask for a photo, so you whine, “I need my sunscreen, Eddie!” Still, he smoothly talks his way into just one picture.

Resigned, you pose for the camera, holding your popsicle out in front of you. There’s drops of melted ice cream gathering at the bottom, near your hands, but you wait until the camera clicks to do anything about it. Cupping your tongue, you gather the liquid then lick a long stripe up the entire length of the popsicle.

Eddie groans, “Jesus fucking christ,” before placing his free hand on your chest and pushing until your back hits the van. He crowds your space, hand remaining firm on you. His eyes are hooded as he looks into your wide, confused gaze. You hold your popsicle in front of his face and remind him, “it’s gonna melt.”

He pushes the popsicle away using the hand holding your camera. With the other hand, he can feel your heart racing underneath his palm. Your breath comes out in shaky pants as he slowly inches his hand upwards to rest on your neck. Leaning forward, he whispers in your ear, “God, you have no fuckin’ idea, do you?” An involuntary whine slips out, but it’s quickly silenced by a light squeeze to your neck.

“So innocent you can’t even see that I want you, huh? My sweet angel, so good you can’t recognize you’re being bad.” The way he speaks about you is reverant, like he worships the ground under feet. His big brown eyes shine with love and lust. You stare into them until your lips meet, then your eyelids flutter shut.

The kiss is intense, like nothing you’ve ever experienced before. He takes the lead and you let him, unsure of what to do. The tip of his tongue runs against the seam of your lips and you gasp, unintentionally letting him in. He explores until you have to part to breathe. A string of saliva connects your lips as you both gasp for air. He grabs your free hand and tugs you into the back of the van.

Shutting the door and setting the camera to the side, he grips your hips and pulls you onto his lap, your back fit snugly to his front. You feel his lips kissing the crook of your neck. “Do you want to continue?” The words are spoken into your skin. You nod, but he doesn’t move, “No, use your words. I need to hear it.”

“Yes, I wanna continue,” you speak quickly, adding, “please.” You can feel his smile on your skin, apparently pleased with your words. He presses wet open-mouthed kisses down your neck, starting behind your ear. Sliding his hands up from your hips, he slips them underneath the sides of your bikini cups. He massages your flesh before pinching your nipples. The sudden action makes you jolt. He chuckles at your surprise and moves his hands lower.

Fiddling around with the strings on your bottoms, a harsh tug pulls the ties undone. The light taps on your thigh signal you to lift your hips, and he throws the piece to the side. His right hand splays across your stomach and slowly heads downward. Leading with his middle finger, he continues until his entire hand cups you. His finger swirls around your hole, gathering the wetness there. The movement makes his palm lightly brush against your clit, but any stimulation is enough to send you reeling.

You’ve completely forgotten about your popsicle until he reminds you, “Don’t want it to melt, do you?” Stopping all movement, he waits for you to act. Shakily, you bring it to your lips and take a lick. Pleased, he slides his middle finger inside you with one fluid stroke. Forgetting all about your popsicle again, you let out a loud whine and focus on the feeling of his finger against your walls. He thrusts a few times, before deciding you can handle a second.

He runs the pads of his fingers up and down trying to find the spongy spot that’s guaranteed to make your toes curl. You gasp when his fingers brush against it, so he massages that area, purposefully rubbing the heel of his palm into your clit. You try to breathe, but you can’t. It feels like all the air has left your body, like your lungs have decided to stop working.

The popsicle stick is sliding out of your hand and you don’t even notice it, but Eddie does. Snatching it up with his left hand, he coos, “Do you need help, baby?” Unsure of what he’s gonna do, you nod cautiously. Bringing the popsicle to your lips, he tells you to open up. You obey, and he slowly presses it in until you can feel the freezing tip against the back of your throat. Pulling the popsicle stick back, you whimper at the loss. Confident you can handle it, he pushes it in and out matching the tempo of his hand.

The cold constantly grabs your attention as he thrusts it in all the way, every time. Now in the wet heat of your mouth, the popsicle is melting at an alarming rate. You’re trying to swallow it all, but there’s so much it drips down your chin and spills onto your chest. “So messy,” he teases, but you barely hear him, the pleasure from both ends is entirely too distracting. Attempting to ground yourself, you grip onto his right arm with both hands.

You’re getting close when he pauses to pull the popsicle out of your mouth. There’s only a little left on each side of the stick, so he eats it and throws the wood away. He praises you for being so obedient, “Good girl, you did so well for me.” You clench hard at his words and he mentally notes your response before moving his fingers again. You don’t know how he knows, but he asks, “Does my angel need to cum?”

Nodding, you squeeze your eyes shut, hard. Shaking his head, he continues, “You can, if you ask nicely.”

“Eddie!” you whine when he pushes particularly hard with his palm, “Can I please cum?” He hums in thought, pretending to consider your request. Meanwhile, his fingers are moving even faster than before, pushing you closer and closer to the edge. Your grip is like iron, now, fingernails digging into his skin.

He concedes, “Well, how can I say no when you ask so nicely? Go ahead.” You see stars behind your closed eyes, leaning your head back onto his shoulder. He presses soothing kisses to your neck and continues his hand motions until you try and squirm away, overstimulated.

You accidentally push back hard against his bulge and you both groan. Helping you off his lap, he gently lays you on your back. Brushing sweat-slicked hair off your forehead, he takes in all the mess on your chest. He licks all the white residue from the popsicle off of you, and you hope silently that he can’t hear your heart pounding hard under his tongue.

“Do you still wanna continue?” he inquires, chin resting on your sternum. You say yes, so he rucks up the top of your bikini. Mischievously, he sucks small marks on the sides of your breasts where the bikini will cover. He notices you watching with impatient eyes and shimmies out of his boxers, sitting on his knees. Lifting up your hips, he rests them over his thighs and gently runs his hands up and down your bare skin.

For a second he appears to be thinking, before he leans over and reaches under one of the seats. You watch, perplexed as he blindly searches, before pulling out a condom. In disbelief, you ask, “Really?”

He shrugs, “You never know when you’re gonna get laid in the back of a van.” You gawk at him, but say nothing more. Watching him put it on is mesmerizing, his hands are so nimble and big. You’re still fascinated as he grips the base of his dick and runs the tip through your folds. “I’m not gonna lie, it might hurt,” he admits, “I’ll go slow, okay?”

You just nod, the anticipation makes you feel afraid to say anything, in fear he’ll turn around and realize this isn’t what he wants. He pushes in entirely in one long movement, kissing your neck because he knows it will help distract you. The stretch burns, you scrunch your eyes at the feeling. Focusing on the crook of your neck, he bites down and sucks to make a mark.

You moan out and clench hard around him. Knowing he’s marking you is so indescribably hot that you can’t control yourself. The rational part of your brain takes over for a few seconds, and you complain, “you’re gonna leave a mark, everyone’s gonna see.”

Eddie laughs, “Well, it feels like you enjoyed it, sweetheart.” Effortlessly, he calls you out on your lie. Flustered, you stutter some lame excuse, but he continues to laugh at you.

Deciding to test the waters, he pulls out partially and pushes back in slowly. When you respond positively, he begins to speed up. The pleasure builds up and you cry out, digging into his shoulders with your nails. “Be a good girl and be quiet for me. Someone might hear you, angel,” he commands, reminding you that you’re in a beach parking lot.

“‘M sorry, I’ll try, promise,” you whimper, wanting to please him. All your energy is dedicated to keeping quiet, but it doesn’t work. With each thrust, you get louder and louder. It’s almost embarrassing how fast your second orgasm builds up, but he just feels so good.

His knuckles brush against your cheek as he coos, “Do you need more help?” You make a noise of agreement, so he slides two fingers into your mouth. They taste slightly like you. Moaning around them, you suck, which makes him groan. He rolls his hips harder, knowing you won’t be able to make noise. Every single time he hits the right spot to make you see stars. Dropping his other hand down, he rubs your clit in tight circles, increasing your bliss. It’s too hard to keep your eyes open now, so you allow them to flutter shut. The loss of sight only adds to the pleasure and you can feel your second orgasm rapidly approaching.

Eddie can feel the way your walls flutter around him. He demands your attention by pushing roughly on your tongue. Your eyes shoot open, and you look at him, vision blurred by tears. “Are you close?” he asks, his tone indicating that he’s expecting something from you. Knowing what he wants, you beg for your release around his fingers. Grinning widely, he commands, “Cum around my cock, I know you can do it. Be a good girl, cum for me.” He says more, but you can’t hear it, all senses consumed by your release. Your orgasm triggers his, and he finishes inside the condom.

Pulling out, he takes off the condom and ties the end, throwing it in the direction of the popsicle stick. You’d chastise him for being so gross if your mind wasn’t so hazy. In a daze, you watch him pick up the camera and take a photo. He takes the nearest marker, a neon pink one, and writes in shaky letters “my angel,” adding a heart to the right.

Finished, he pours some water from a bottle onto his beach towel and wipes the mess off your legs. You flinch when he presses too hard on a sensitive spot. He apologizes, cleaning you with a gentler touch. Eddie pulls your top to its proper place before finding your bikini bottoms and tying them for you. He slips on his swim trunks and nudges your leg, “C’mon, you need to rinse off.” You try to stay on the floor, but he forces you up and takes you to the beach showers outside.

With shaky legs, you struggle to stand so you opt to lean on Eddie, who wraps his arm around your waist. He turns on the water and helps wash the sticky coconut residue off your face and torso. His touch is soothing, and you lean into his hand, closing your eyes. You realize that you’re going to have to go back to the beach, so you mutter, “I don’t think I can walk.”

Turning off the water, he offers a piggyback ride. You perk up, “Really?”

He chuckles at your enthusiasm, “Yes, really.” Kneeling down, he lets you climb onto his back. Before going back to the beach, he stops by the car and hands you his leather jacket, “For the mark,” he says, tapping his neck to show you where your hickey is. You slip it on and wrap your hands around his neck, squeezing tighter and begging him not to drop you when he begins to run. “Special delivery!” he exclaims, setting you down between Steve and Robin.

You instantly drop back, “I’ve never been so glad to be on solid ground.” Dustin calls Eddie away, leaving just the three of you.

Steve has a stupid smirk on his face, which makes you squint at him. After a tense second, he asks, “Yea? You’re not glad about other things?” Realizing he’s pointing to the hickey, you pull the jacket higher on your neck, embarrassed.

Steve laughs, but Robin defends you, “Leave her alone, you knew they were gonna go make out.” She turns to you, “Next time you two are gonna run off somewhere, think of better excuses. Sunscreen and the bathroom are too generic.” You completely forgot about your sunscreen! You groan and drop your head back, covering your face with your hands. At least they think you were only making out.

Continuing the conversation, Steve starts bragging about the craziest places he’s made out. You tune out the conversation in favour of watching Eddie. He looks so genuinely happy here, with his friends, having fun. He catches your eyes and smiles wide. You grin back, content to watch him living happy and healthy.

[bugeater101]

귀여워요...

Synopsis: You’ve been dating Hyunjin for a while and you haven’t let your insecurities intrude upon your relationship yet. But, with Hyunjin’s idolization of you, it seemed like only a matter of time before they crept in. All you want to do is take care of him, but you think you can never live up to what he deserves. However, when Hyunjin finally hears about how discouraged you feel, he will make sure you know how precious you are to him. 

Content: insecurities related to weight and body image, a bit of fluff and angst but mostly smut, fem!reader x Hyunjin, insecure!reader, dom!hyunjin, sub!reader, reader is described as being chubby/fat/plus size, perv!Hyunjin (like a lot ohmygod), innocent!reader, virigin!reader, corruption kink, pet names, impact play, punishment, degradation, man handling, praise kink, no use of condom (wrap it before you tap it guys !!!), mentions of oral

Word Count: 6.5k (oh jeez)

Author’s Notes: okay so this is my first time publishing something I wrote, so please be patient with me ! I’m hoping to put more content out in the future :) Also, the title means “cute” in Korean. 

Hyunjin was stuck in the dorms, the rain cancelling his plans to go on a midnight picnic with you by the Han river. He didn’t care though: he still got to see you later tonight and that was all that mattered. On days like this, when his muscles ached from the early morning dance practices and his throat was sore from the late-night vocal sessions, you were the only thing that could recharge him.

When you cuddled him, pampered him, and called him “baby” after he had been straining himself all day, he felt as if all the pain was worth it. Sometimes, he was happy when his feet burned from dancing too hard because he knew that you would be at home, waiting for him. To cook for him, hug him, twirl his hair, kiss him, press him into your figure... 

Days like these seemed to come few and far between. Pain would absorb him and he would be weary beyond belief, but you would be there to treat him so nicely and call him your baby. So, he loved days like these, especially today since you were stuck in his mind all throughout practice. He even messed up during dance practice (earning a burning glare from Leeknow) because he was stuck thinking about you. More specifically, you and that fucking skirt you wore last night.

Yesterday, you came to the dorm and you just had to show up wearing that damn black skirt. Because of your ample size and the skirt’s already scandalous length, it managed to hang just enough to cover you somewhat decently. And, since you were obviously well-endowed, the skirt was even shorter in the back, too. Hyunjin could barely contain himself the entire movie while you cuddled into him, pressing your ass against his crotch like you didn’t know what you were doing. Honestly, Hyunjin thought you probably didn’t know, given as your smile was sweet and innocent and cute, like it always was.

God, how could she do this, he thought to himself as he felt his face heat up. He snaked his arm around you, giving you seemingly pure and comforting rubs on your thighs. However, there was no good nature in his touch: he wanted to rile you up. And it worked. Every time he rubbed your thighs, you pushed them together or toyed with the hem of your skirt. By the time you had established a deep blush, Hyunjin already had a smirk plastered on his face. He loved, even adored his effect on you. 

Hyunjin knew you weren’t ready to do anything beyond heavy makeout sessions, that you needed more time to be comfortable with him. Yet, he couldn’t help but tease you. How could he when it was just too easy? He found his pants unbearably tight that night, but they constrained him completely when you bent over in front of him to gather your things before you left. It was almost as if you were purposefully displaying yourself for him (although Hyunjin did have to lean forward from his position on the couch to get a better look). You were just wearing simple white cotton panties, but Hyunjin still stared at them like they were art. Squinting his eyes, he used the little concentration he could muster to focus on the garment, so lewd yet all on display just for him. 

Staring at your damp panties, Hyunjin realized how much you had lied to him. How could you act so clueless, so innocent when you were practically soaked just from a few lingering touches and ruts? You were so wet, your panties clung to you and were practically transparent. If he tried, Hyunjin could almost, just almost, see right through them. Fuck he just wanted to press his face into your heat, keep you bent over, and eat you out right then and there with your panties still on; have you begging to let you cum all over his tongue, even for him to just touch you directly. The thought alone was making him audibly gulp, but thank God that you were blissfully unaware of the effect you had on him and his throbbing cock. You simply snapped up and stared at him with your wide eyes, responding with an ignorant, “Oh, baby, are you thirsty?” to which he chuckled. Of course he was.

Hyunjin knew you weren’t ready for any of the stuff he wanted to do, but he was of course happy to wait. You needed time, and you didn’t need to explain it to him. However, he couldn’t help but wonder why you refrained from engaging in anything beyond rutting into him, despite his obvious desires to be with you beyond that. You were a goddess, and it wasn’t just him who thought you were the epitome of beauty. Even his members were jealous of him when he announced that you two had started dating, with Changbin even commenting “lucky bastard” with a snide but proud expression. So, Hyunjin knew you needed time, but the thought that he would be your first, accompanied by the fact that so many others would just love to fuck you, made him go crazy.

With a clatter from the kitchen, Hyunjin was brought back to reality. He looked around and saw Felix swearing as he had dropped a pan, spilling egg all over the floor. Hyunjin laughed and teased him before helping out, but his mind was elsewhere. He was heading over to your house today, and couldn’t wait to see you.

---

“Baby!” You shouted when you opened the door to see Hyunjin’s tall frame at the threshold of your apartment. Jumping into Hyunjin’s arms, you caused him to stumble a bit and earned a laugh from him. He smiled as you clung to him, kissing your forehead and swaying together momentarily. The hug immediately eased all his worries from the day, making for the perfect beginning to your evening together. Even with his muscles aching from practice, he still felt like he could stand like this forever, especially with your chest pressing into his like that.

“How have you been today, y/n, my lovely girlfriend?” He asked, looking down at you. 

Suddenly, his heart dropped. Your expression said it all: you had obviously been crying, tears having stained your cheeks red. You adorned black sweat pants and his hoodie that swallowed you whole, making you look formless. Hyunjin’s mind immediately flooded with worry for you, even if his perverted self couldn’t be contained. 

Though he tried to focus on the here and now, the thought of you wearing his hoodie with tears streaming down your face made his mind wander. He wondered if you would look the same while he railed you, tears brimming your eyes as you begged him to slow down. 

Fuck, get it together, he mentally yelled at himself.

“Y/n, what’s wrong?” Distress layered his voice as he bent down to cup your face in his hands, but you blinked and darted your eyes away from his. 

“Nothing.... nothing’s the matter, baby,” you responded as you grabbed his wrists and pushed them away from your face. You held on to one of his wrists and pulled him into your apartment, shutting the door behind you. “Just tired is all.”

Hyunjin obliged and followed you in, dropping his bag on the ground near the door. However, when you tried to lead him further in, he immediately pulled you back to get a good look at you. Weariness washed over your face with a tone behind your eyes hinting at the true sadness you were hiding. 

Worst of all, you looked embarrassed, and—with Hyunjin being Hyunjin—that just made him think of all the things he could do to make you embarrassed. 

You asshole, stop using your dick to think and be with her. He shook his head. 

“No, you’re not ‘just tired,’” he said softly, grabbing your hands in his own. “Y/n, tell me now, what is wrong?” Biting your lip, your eyes moved away from his steady gaze and looked at your intertwined hands again, trying to make him avoid seeing your tears. Your tears make you look so cute like that, his mind wanted to say, making him want to slap himself as he tried to be a good boyfriend despite his dirty thoughts. 

“Oh, Y/n” Hyunjin sighed, taking a hand to wipe away your tear and rub your cheek. “Come on, let’s go to your room.” 

Pulling you towards your bedroom, Hyunjin sat down at the foot of your bed as he held your hand. “Sweetie, come here,” he pulled you towards him, rubbing his thigh to indicate you to sit on him, but you wouldn’t budge. You shook your head.

“Jinnie... no... I can’t,” you whimpered. You finally looked up at Hyunjin, fresh tears prickling your eyes. “I can’t...” you mumbled again, fiddling with the sleeve of his hoodie that you wore. “You... I’m... it won’t work....” You tugged more at the hoodie and sweatpants you wore, constantly readjusting the clothing to better hug or pull away from your body. Studying you, Hyunjin looked at you with a certain peculiarity. You weren’t normally like this, so self-conscious, so aware of him looking at you—

Hyunjin felt like he was hit with a bag of bricks. Thank god his mind finally decided to think straight for a second. Still, the moment of clarity was not met with celebration. If what he was thinking was correct, it made his heart ache. 

“Y/N, don’t tell me you think you’re too heavy to sit on my lap?” He asked with sadness layering his voice. The pain he felt was insurmountable; he couldn’t imagine feeling worse. That is, until you started quickly nodding your head.

“Not just that,” you responded with a quick pace. “But everything: too heavy to sit on your lap, for you to pick up, to fit into your sweats, to do... you know... anything.... especially the stuff I’ve never done before....” the last part made your cheeks and ears heat up, turning more visibly red, and Hyunjin had to mentally (and almost physically) slap himself to keep himself in line. He couldn’t get caught up in how flustered you got just from the thought of fucking him when you were sobbing right in front of him. Be a good boyfriend, he yelled at himself internally. 

But, when he heard what you said next, he was done for.

“Really, the only thing that’s holding me back now from... that...” you mumbled with embarrassment, “is that I am worried you won’t like what you see.” 

Hyunjin’s pulse dropped. The world around him seeming hollow. 

How could you say that? How could you even think that you shouldn’t fuck him, or that he wouldn’t fuck you, because you thought he wouldn’t like your body? That he wouldn’t think you were pretty, sexy, or hot enough for him? Even now, as you were confessing these horrible thoughts to him, all he could think about was burying his cock in you. It pissed him off. Goddammit, his mind yelled at him while he attempted to keep himself poised on the outside.

“Y/n...” Hyunjin sighed, making you look up at him with beautiful, tear-filled eyes. He softly grabbed both of your hands in his, and stroked them gently. You thought you would stay like this, the silence engulfing you. That would have been enough: to be ensconced with him, letting the light movements of his hands and his worried eyes tell you that all of his love is yours. That would have been enough. Hyunjin, however, had different plans. 

With a sudden movement and the tightening of his grip, Hyunjin swiftly pulled you into him. You yelped, the sound making you somehow even more embarrassed. You were already humiliated, and now that little scream made you feel like a blushing mess. This situation could not become more mortifying. That is, until you noticed the position Hyunjin had maneuvered you into. With each leg on either side of him, your full weight was pressing into your boyfriend. Your intertwined hands pressed between your chests, squished between your torsos and offering some separation between your bodies. His boldness made your eyes go wide, and you truly almost gasped. However, Hyunjin shut you up by pressing your lips into his, smiling into the kiss with a content grin. Slowly, his smile faded as the kiss became more passionate. It was still romantic, but almost became needy if not for the delicateness of it all. His actions were borderline carnal, the movement of his tongue telling you to accept his love. If not, he would surely go mad. 

Breaking the kiss, Hyunjin’s eyes looked at you up and down, enjoying the surprised look on your face. With your lips red from abuse and parted slightly, Hyunjin was relieved that your clasped hands had separated your bodies. If he hadn’t kept some space between you two, your entire body would be pressing into his cock. If that was the case, then he wouldn’t have taken his mouth off of you for even a second.

“Bold of you to say that I wouldn’t like you crushing me, Y/n,” he said, making you giggle through your tears. “You aren’t ‘too heavy’, or ‘too big’, or ‘too anything’ for me, okay?” you smiled in response, your silence speaking for itself. 

“Tell me honey,” your boyfriend continued, situating his hands on your lower back while you moved yours to his shoulders, maintaining what little space there was between you two. His eyes were steady, and his face kind. “What has you thinking like this? What happened that made my cute little y/n think so negatively of herself?” You toyed with the collar of his shirt, breaking away from his contemplative eyes.

“Just... when I wore that skirt yesterday...” 

Oh fuck, Hyunjin thought to himself.

“... I just looked and felt so disgusting in it. You could see everything.... and... never mind...” new tears pricked at your eyes. Hyunjin, on the other hand, was infuriated. His eyes were wide, and his fingers on your lower back had ceased rubbing. His anger stemmed from one thing: the thought that you found yourself... “disgusting” in that delectable fucking skirt. He wanted to scream,  but most of all he wanted to change your mind.

“Y/N,” you looked up at him again, trying to stifle your tears, but failing. “Y/N, please cry if it will make you feel better, okay?” You nodded along, using your sleeves to pat your eyes dry. Hyunjin continued, “You should know that there is nothing you could ever, ever do that would make me think of you as... ‘disgusting.’” The last word rolled off of his tongue with such hatred, such complete distaste that his endearing words before were almost tainted by the flavour it left on his tongue. 

“You are so stunning, so utterly gorgeous... honestly, I wish you saw yourself the way I did, y/n. I think you, your figure... are perfect for me.” Hyunjin hoped his words got to you as he continued his reassuring back rubs. You were hard to decipher as you simply nodded along. You placed your damp hands back on his shoulders, staring into his eyes. Then, you slowly started to smile and Hyunjin’s heart swelled.

“Thank you, Hyunjin,” you said with love layering your voice. 

“Y/N, you’re the most beautiful person, you know that, yeah?” 

You nodded along. “Yes, I do honey, I do.” 

“Say it then, okay?” He asked.

“What!?"

“Say that you are perfect, okay?” Embarrassment immediately washed over you while your face turned crimson. God she’s so perfect and adorable like this, Hyunjin thought. 

“Say you are the cutest, most gorgeous person, okay? Please? I know it will help.” You looked down and mumbled into your chest, to which Hyunjin laughed at. “No, y/n, say it right,” he encouraged. You took a deep breath and began again. 

“I’m-m.... the prettiest, most gorgeous and... and...” you struggled with the words, overwhelmed and self-conscious of yourself.

“... and perfect,” Hyunjin finished with a smile, placing his hand on your cheek and returning your eyes to his. 

“... and p-perfect person,” you repeated as your face remained flushed. “And I’m all yours,” he smiled wider at that, his eyes almost disappearing behind his endearing gaze. 

You sniffled and smiled again, laughing at how good you felt, at how good he made you feel. To thank him, you leaned in and placed a light peck on his full lips. You placed your head on his shoulder as he held you close, cuddling as you sat on his lap while you toyed with his hoodie strings. “Thanks.. you always know what to say, baby.”  

...Baby... 

That word... the name hung in the air around Hyunjin. Suddenly, it’s like every perverted thought he’s ever had came rushing to him. He couldn’t help himself. A small smile appeared on Hyunjin’s lips. 

“Lastly,” he said softly, making you perk up and stare into his charming eyes. Truly, you believed he would encourage you to sing more praises about yourself. You thought it was a good mental exercise, and was happy to oblige if it was his wish. 

But, then, his grip moved downwards onto your ass, tightened, and shoved you forward into his chest and onto his cock. 

“You should know how much I really, really, liked that skirt.”

“Hyun....Hyunjin...” you whimpered out, feeling his full cock underneath you. You were already so warm, so tingly, and such a fucking mess, and fuck you were so flustered on top of him. 

“What, y/n?” he teased. Leisurely, he started pushing your ass back and forth on his cock, earning a whimper from you that only made his dick throb harder. 

“Take over love, I know you can,” Hyunjin chuckled. And so you did, keeping your hands steady on his shoulders as you guided your clothed core over the firm bulge in Hyunjin’s pants. He leaned forward and kept kissing you as you whimpered into him before moving down to your neck. 

“Y/n,” he breathed into you.

“Mmhm, what is it baby?” With a groan, he started to guide your hips harsher and push you down harder onto his tent, earning a moan from you that made him bite down on your neck. 

Before Hyunjin could go further, however, he pulled away to look into your longing eyes. 

“We can stop whenever you want, okay? You said that you were hesitant before, but let me know if-”

“No! No,” you replied quickly, “Baby, I want to! Please!” 

Hyunjin’s cock ached and his mouth hung open at your eagerness. You hadn’t even stopped rutting against him like the horny bitch you were. 

“‘Please’?” Hyunjin mocked, teasing you and making you blush all the more harder. 

“Please...”, you restated, burying your face in his shoulder trying to hide from your boyfriend’s taunts. However, before you could wallow in humiliation, you were thrown aside with a swift toss. You bounced on your bed as you landed, Hyunjin hovering over you and caging you in his arms. 

“That’s all you had to say, y/n.” His lips viciously attacked your neck while his hands ran up and down your sides, slowly pushing his hoodie that you wore up your body to expose your breasts. Before he could stare at your bare chest, however, you grabbed his wrists, restraining him. He glanced up to your eyes, only to see a worried face.

“How about this,” he spoke calmly, “I take off some clothes also, and that will make you more comfortable, yeah? How about we level the playing field?” He proposed, to which you nodded contently to. He rose up and stripped himself of his hoodie and pants, revealing his slim, muscular, borderline God-like body. However, your eyes were immediately drawn down his toned torso to the growing tent in his black boxers. Hyunjin chuckled at your expression, almost seeing the saliva building up in your mouth at the sight of his clothed cock.

“You like what you see?” He joked as his hands slowly rubbed the bulge. He hissed at the touch, and you almost (almost) did drool at the sight. Before he could indulge himself further, Hyunjin clamoured back on top of you, snuggling between your legs. “Because I do.” 

Kissing into you, Hyunjin pushed your sweater up to your shoulders as you whimpered into him. Pulling away, he was finally able to look at you fully. He sharply inhaled at the sight of your breasts and his mouth immediately attached to them, making you release a moan that only encouraged him suck harder, hands flying to his hair. With every tug to his head, his eagerness increased. It took over as his teeth started preceded every kiss and nibble to your chest, slightly nipping at your bud while his hand toyed with the other. 

“Baby, fuck please keep going!” you breathed out. You were shocked by how fast things were progressing, yet still responded to his every move. It didn’t matter how harsh he was fondling or playing with you, or how soft his reassuring rubs and kisses were. You gasped and convulsed at every little thing, and Hyunjin loved it.  

“Fuck, y/n,” he mumbled into your chest as he groped you harshly. “Princess, you fucking love it when I play with you like this, my little cute plaything, huh?” 

You whimpered at his degrading words but the persistent throbbing between your legs kept you going. Since Hyunjin was seated between your legs, you couldn’t even rub your thighs together for relief. To receive some satisfaction, you unconsciously snaked your legs around your boyfriend’s hips and pushed his bulge further into you, trying to rub your clit through the layers of fabric

Fuck, what is this girl doing to me? Hyunjin thought, formulating the first coherent sentence in his mind since he started to devour you. What made it worse was when you quickly started rutting into him, outpacing him. 

“Y/n, we can go slow, I-”

“No! Baby, please,” you protested, slowing your movements to calm yourself. “I-I want your cock! Please!” 

Hyunjin was surprised—shocked, even—at your desperation. Nevertheless, he was more pleased by the fact that he had turned you into such a slut.

“Y/n,” Hyunjin chuckled as he pulled away from your chest to look into your eyes, still unhurriedly rubbing his cock against your clothed heat to keep you whimpering. “You’re such a needy girl, huh?” You nodded quickly to his statement, broadening his taunting smile. 

“Well, say it then.”

“What?”

Hyunjin growled, “Say you’re so fucking needy, that you want my cock so badly that you can’t fucking wait for me to put it in you and wreck you. That all you think about is my cock destroying your cute, little pussy. Okay?” 

“I-I.... Jinnie,” despite your efforts to object to Hyunjin’s ask, you were lost in how he slowly traced along your waist band. “Baby, I-I don’t know if I- aah!” Slipping his hand further into your pants, Hyunjin began to rub your pussy over your panties. 

“What’s that, Y/N?” he asked nonchalantly as he pushed the fabric to the side so he could run his fingers through your slit, only to then push one into you. You moaned loudly and Hyunjin kept up his efforts, toying your clit with his thumb as he pumped you with his finger. 

“If you don’t say it, then I can assure you that you won’t be getting any relief tonight, love,” he said before returning to your chest, sucking on your tits while he finger-fucked you. 

Everything he did was perfect, it was like he was reading your fucking mind. You were barely speaking coherently, and beyond that you were barely even touching him, only tugging on his hair occasionally for relief. Yet, he knew exactly what you wanted. You wanted to scream out that you wanted his cock, his lips on you, to eat you out, to suck his dick, to fuck you from behind, to ride him... everything. You wanted him. And fuck, you would do anything to get him. 

As Hyunjin played with you, he could tell that you were about to burst. There was no point in trying to out-smart him. Hell, you could barely think with the way your pussy gushed at every push of his index and, now, his added middle finger, or with every grope or kiss to your chest or rub to your thighs. He wanted to fuck you too, but he wanted you to work for it. And, fuck, you had to do it.

“I’m so fucking needy, Hyunjin- I can’t help it,” You confessed, letting your pride slip away. “Only you do this to me! I get so fucking wet thinking about you and my fingers can’t fuck me the way I want you to. Please, Hyunjin, please please, I’ve been so good! Please, baby, I-”

The slip of the pet name sent Hyunjin over the edge. Instantly, he ripped your sweatpants and panties completely off of you, exposing your glistening cunt to him. So fucking badly he wanted to lap you up, to press his tongue into you and drink all your juices just like he thought about last night, but right now the pain under his boxers was too intense for him to ignore. Next time though, he thought to himself, I’ll eat her out the entire fucking night. 

With a growl, he dove on top of you again and attached his lips to yours hungrily, driving his clothed cock against your core. He had pinned your hands above you, leaving you a whining mess underneath him that did nothing but helplessly rut into him, moaning with every rub of his bulge against your clit. You couldn’t help it.

“Baby, please don’t tease,” you begged quietly. Hyunjin was taken aback, surprised by your demands. He almost wanted to tease you further, but he couldn’t help it. Looking into your puppy dog eyes, he just had to give in (not to mention that your pussy was soaking his boxers). Hyunjin obliged, pulling himself away so he could take off his boxers. When he pulled them down, his cock slapped against his abs and you almost gasped at its size. It was so long that his large hands seemed minuscule in comparison. He pumped it leisurely, and you let your mind wander at the sight. You and him secretly both fantasized about how your (noticeably smaller) hands would look around his leaking, blushing dick. 

“I’m being a tease, y/n?” he interrogated, “I could have sworn that you were the one who began to rut against me, huh?” he groaned out and you almost could cry at how empty you felt, how you longed for his dick in you and to finally get to cum. 

“I’m s-sorry, Hyunnie,” you murmured. “Please, I’ll be good, please, baby.”

Fuck that fucking name.

Hyunjin towered over you and hiked up your legs, placing his hands behind your knees and pressing them down to into your chest. You were spread for him, completely ready to take him. With his hands pinning your knees up to your chest, forcing your arms down into the bed and your smushing your exposed breasts together, you had no choice but to let yourself be revealed to him. 

“I’ll go easy y/n,” He said as he slid his dick back and forth through your heat, making you plead for him.

“Go as hard as you want, baby,” you responded. 

You second guessed your words as pain washed over you. Hyunjin’s mind was lost in how good your pussy surrounded him, your whines music to his ears. He sank into you slowly, every inch making you silently gasp, and he pushed his eyes together and fought every urge not to cum right then and there. Soon, he completely bottomed out in you, rocking slightly to allow your tightness to adjust to his size. You sat there, his cock in you as you tried to get out an audible moan. The pain soon turned into pleasure and you began to roll your hips into him, Hyunjin taking this as a sign to pull out slowly and push in again at a quicker pace.

“So precious and adorable, drooling for me,” Hyunjin mumbled out in a hush breath as he composed himself, trying not to immediately fuck into you at an unforgiving pace.

Every pump into you made you yelp slightly as Hyunjin kept singing sweet praises to you. “My pretty, cute girl,” hyunjin worshiped, “such a good girl for her sweet baby, rewarding me so nicely.” The words rolled off of his lips as they brushed yours, which were left stuttering with every stroke of his cock. A few moments later Hyunjin began to speed up as you became adjusted to his size. Well, as "adjusted” as you could be. He was big but, still, the stretch was fucking heavenly. Delicious, sweet pleasure began to run through your body as Hyunjin groped you with every thrust, your juices mixing together and the sounds of your moans filling the room.

You couldn’t take it anymore. “Please, baby, faster,” you pleaded. 

She’s too good to me. Hyunjin thought as he picked up the pace upon request, his aggressive action showing his eagerness. 

“Fuck, Hyunjin- I-”, you managed to get out. At first, he had peacefully rocked into you. Now, his speed was almost relentless. You moaned as his girth filling you, him bottoming out with every push back into your cunt. Tingling began to fill you and Hyunjin noticed as your pussy clenched harder, encouraging him to quicken his pace and keep going. It felt like you were almost fucking him as you ricocheted from his force.

“Hyun-jin-ie,” you whined out the syllables between the snaps of his hips. Despite the building pressure in the pit of your stomach—and Hyunjin’s beautiful groans mixed with the occasional laugh at your feeble state—you couldn’t help but feel self-concious. His eyes were fixated on you when he wasn’t holding them shut from pleasure, staring at you body with a hungry gaze: your tits bouncing with every shove of his cock into your pussy, how he disappeared into you, the blush on your cheeks— he loved it all, and god forbid he look away. Not to mention the sounds of your whines and moans that filled the room and somehow managed to cover the sound of his cock pistoning into you. But, he still wanted more. 

“I- pl-please Hyunjin I c-c-can’t I-” you hiccuped.

“Baby you’re doing so good,” he panted back, reassuring you. “You’re so- fuck- so fucking cute like this, oh fuck...” As he got lost in the feel of your plush walls, you found yourself turning into an even bigger blushing mess at his admiration. You were almost about to cry, not only from the defenceless state you were in, but from the fact that he liked you like this. But, pressing your eyes shut only amplified the sensation of his cock viciously dragging against your walls and the sounds of him fucking you. You were getting lost in the pleasure, your nipples perking up as they dragged across your pinned legs, your body jostling with each thrust of his cock into you. 

“I’m your baby, right?” Hyunjin asked, snapping you back into reality. You looked at him with the biggest, most confused eyes, amplifying your helpless state and, in turn, making him groan louder. “I’m your precious little baby right? Your cute little baby that you always make feel so good, right- oh fuck!”  His words were almost said teasingly, with a pout on his lips and a cute inflection in his voice. He was mocking you, and it felt degrading in the best way. 

“Hyunjinie, ah- oh fuck,” you gasped. “It’s not like that it’s- Ah!” You yelped as you felt Hyunjin get deeper into you. With the switch of his arm placements, he was now holding your legs down behind your knees with a single arm while his other arm roamed free, making him press closer and deeper into yo,. “Hyunjinie I- ah!” You felt a sharp slap to your thigh. The lingering sensation made the tears start streaming prickling your eyes. You looked up at your boyfriend’s glistening face with doe eyes, but his were almost cold if not for the hint of pleasure lingering in them from the hit.

“That’s not my name,” he growled. You looked back, confused, fuelling his aggression. “What’s that name you always call me, hmm? C’mon, y/n, I know you know it. Say it, say it.” Somehow, though he slowed his pace, it only made the pleasure more noticeable, his thrusts becoming more controlled, more precise, harder. 

oh fuck, you thought, the name?

You could barely think as his cock dragged all coherent thoughts out of you. You whined and groaned, searching your mind before you became completely lost. Another slap broke you from your trance.

“Say it.” Hyunjin demanded. With the raise of his hand again to your reddening, soft thigh, you finally brought yourself out of the hypnotizing thrusts of his dick.

“Baby!” You whimpered, finally coming back to your sense. “Please, I’ll be good! Just wanna cum, just for my baby” you hiccuped. Suddenly, his eyes went wide, blinking and becoming softer with the lowering of his hand, his hips still keeping a steady pace. 

“That’s right, I’m your precious baby, huh?” He teased, picking up the pace of his motions and allowing you to calm down momentarily before you became lost in his rhythms. 

“You’re so cute like that. So cute like this. And I’m your baby, so you gotta take care of me, hmm?” he teased, “Take care of me, yeah, take care of your precious ‘Hyunjinnie.’” He still mocked and teased you, but every praise, every sting of mockery, you loved. With sweat pouring out of him, he still managed to pick up his pace, you pressing your eyes shut in response. 

“Fuck, but you’re my baby now, huh? You like being like this, don’t you? You like my cock turning you into my own little slut, my own little cocksleeve, hmm?”

“N-no! I’m a good girl! I’m-” you shut up as you felt Hyunjin slap your thigh again .

“No.... Y/n... you’re my little toy. Fuck, you’re almost as cute as when I made you admit it: that you’re perfect, that your pussy is the only one for me. Now, I want you to say that you love my cock, that you love the way your pussy feels around me, that you love me, that you think you’re so fucking cute like this, huh?” Hyunjin’s tone was almost maniacal as he used his spare hand to aggressively rub your clit, making you moan out as your tears poured down your face from the over stimulation. 

“Baby, please,” you hiccuped out as your pussy throbbed in pain from the constant pressure Hyunjin was making you endure. Suddenly, you heard a growl erupt from Hyunjin’s lips, so you opened your teary eyes to see the man above you, towering over your crushed form with nothing but desire in his eyes, a carnal nature consuming him.

“Say it.” 

Overwhelming neediness overtook you, and you lost all composure.

“Fuck yes, then baby, fuck, yes!” you moaned out, finally responding to him. “I’m perfect! I’m your perfect little pocket pussy who makes you feel so goddamn good. I loved being used by you and being your little slut! Now please, Hyunjin— baby, please let me cum!” 

Lost in your words, Hyunjin groaned out as his unbearable place somehow managed to quicken again. Nimble fingers returned to your sensitive, aching clit to viciously rub you as he passionately kissed you. Your moans were lost against his lips, and the building in you became obvious.

“Then come, baby, come all over me,” Hyunjin breathed out, breaking the kiss. With his permission, you finally release yourself as you hit your climax. Relief mixed with overstimulation hit you as your back arched, his dick diving even deeper than before. Hyunjin moan’s out and you feel his cum coat your walls, you juices and his mixing together. 

His arms quiver and with a shaky breath he carefully lets himself collapse on you, slipping his dick out so the liquids leak out onto your bed. Panting heavily together, you lay not speaking to one another, your minds trying to catch up with what just happened.

“... baby?” You asked between hot gulps for air. 

“Yeah?” Hyunjin responded, face planted in the crevice of your neck and shoulder, barely moving as he tries to compose himself.

“Thank you,” you tell him, slowly rubbing his back while he rubs your trembling, sore legs. Gathering his strength and sitting up on his arms, he looks into your drowsy eyes and pecks your lips.

“No, thank you, y/n,” he mumbles with adoration coating his words. “C’mon, let’s clean you up.”

---

Hyunjin stared at your sleeping form, your chest slowly rising underneath his oversized shirt. Despite the darkness of the room, the lights from the city illuminated your figure, acting as a sort of night-light for Hyunjin. He stared at you, pride and love filling his chest, but also a rising feeling of what could come. Even though he dreaded the possibility of you doubting your beauty or despising your figure again, he did long for the time to show you how much he loved you. To show you that every inch of you was desired, but that only he was allowed to have you. 

Hyunjin couldn’t help but to think of all the things he wanted to do with you now that your sex life had begun. He wanted you begging for his cum down your throat, for you to crush his face, to lap up your juices, to fuck yourself with toys all day so you were ready for him as soon as he got home. It sounded so fucking nice, and Hyunjin almost grew hard at the thought but stopped at the ache of his cock. As the wincing pain went away, he glanced back to your peaceful face and smiled. 

The idea of “next time” sounded so good. 

[erin-bo-berin]

I LOVE your writing it's so amazing! Can I request a steve harrington smut?

Steve x fem: reader share an intimate night together before going into the upside down? Them just taking their time with each other. They have sweet romantic sex telling each other how much they love one one another and after they make it through they are gonna get married and start a family so maybe a breeding kink in there? This idea has been in my head for awhile now:)

Omg my heart 🥺 I love how this has feelings like “one last time before we go” type thing but also makes them stronger and willing to fight so they make it out.

I have been wanting to use this gif for so long and I’m so happy to finally use it LOOK AT HOW GENTLE AND LOVING HE IS WHEW

Whatever Happens

Steve Harrington x Reader

Warnings: Smut

You sat with your knees pulled to your chest, arms wrapped around your legs.

You stared out the window near the bed, able to see the bright stars of the night beyond it, even though the curtains were pulled closed.

You heard the sound of a faucet running in the bathroom before being turned off. The pad of footsteps walking from the bedroom, then the bed dipping alerted you that Steve had returned to the room.

He touched your arm gently and you turned your head to look at him.

“You’re overthinking again, aren’t you?” he asked, softly.

“I’m scared, Steve,” you admitted in a whisper.

“I know. I am too,” he replied, honestly.

Tomorrow, you, Steve and some of your group of friends—Lucas, Max, Erica, Dustin, Eddie, Nancy and Robin were going into the Upside Down to stop Vecna for good. You knew he needed to be stopped, you knew if anyone could do it, it was your group of friends, but you were still riddled with anxiety.

“But you know what?” he asked, threading his fingers through yours.

“What?” you whispered.

“We’re going to fight our asses off and beat this asshole. Okay?”

You nodded, smiling a tiny bit.

“But there’s something even more important about getting through tomorrow.”

“Yeah?”

“Whatever happens tomorrow, afterwards, I want to marry you, Y/N,” he smiled, bringing his other hand up to your face, thumb stroking your cheek.

You and Steve had discussed marriage many times before and you had been adamant that you didn’t need an extravaganza, you just wanted to spend your life with him. In fact, you weren’t even really engaged, but that didn’t bother you. He’d always said he was going to marry you one day and his intentions were clear.

“I want to marry you, too,” you smiled.

“Yeah?” he said, “Start our family. With lots of kids?”

“You having these kids, Steve?” you laughed, pulling his hand from your face into your free one and kissing it.

“Well, I was thinking six kids.”

“Six?!” you squawked.

Although you were teasing, it was fun to see his reaction.

“Aw come on babe, wouldn’t you love to see six little Steves running around?” he pouted.

You groaned playfully, falling backwards on the bed dramatically.

“Some days you are handful enough.”

“Hey, I resent that,” he chuckled, peering down at you from where he remained.

“That does sound nice though,” you smiled, “I want to make that happen.”

He leaned down, kissing you softly.

“Me too. You know what else I want to make happen?”

He crawled over you so his face and body were now hovering over you, the warmth of it radiating into you.

“What’s that?”

“For tonight to be about us,” he said, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

His hand slid up your leg, a small groan coming from him. You’d freshly lotioned them earlier and he marveled at the silky softness of your skin.

“I’m all for that,” you smiled, arms wrapping around his neck.

His hand came up to your hair, stroking it softly with his fingers before leaning down and connecting your lips.

He kissed you sweetly, softly, mouth parting just the slightest for you to slip your tongue in. You moan softly as the kiss progressed, his teeth sinking gently into your bottom lip, tugging it.

His hands traveled up from your thighs, pushing your night shirt up with them, wasting no time. He was already shirtless, preferring to sleep with you pressed against his bare chest, so he was eager to get the fabric that covered your beautiful frame, off you.

His hips pressed into yours as you kissed him, a soft whine leaving your throat at the feeling of the thickening cock hidden by his pants rubbing against your throbbing core. His mouth didn’t bother leaving yours as he pulled your underwear down your hips, your legs naturally widening for you.

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he murmured in awe when he pulled away to sit back and look down at you.

His eyes were lidded, lips already swollen from your kisses as he raked his gaze over your body. You laid out for him, smiling shyly. It’s not like you hadn’t been in this same position a million times before, but he always made you feel like he was seeing your body for the first time—each and every time.

“You know, if tonight is about us, then it should really be about us,” you smirked, watching him.

“I’m not sure I follow,” he said quizzically.

“Lay back,” you whispered, pushing his shoulder so he’d follow your instruction.

He obeyed, laying against the sheets, watching as you climbed over him.

“You always spend so much time worshipping my body,” you bit your lip.

One finger ran over his lips, then down his chin and neck. You flattened your hand until it ran down his chest and to his stomach.

“I want to spend some time on yours,” you uttered.

Sure, you left your fair share of kisses and hickeys on him, but you’d never had the opportunity to take your time with his body and you so desperately wanted to.

“Okay,” he breathed shakily.

You started at his lips, naturally. They were addicting. The way they could part yours, tongue swirling with yours, bringing moans from your throat was almost downright sinful.

His hands rub your sides as you move on from his mouth. You nibble at his jaw then lower to his neck. You place a kiss to the more prominent moles on his neck.

His body is covered in them and you absolutely love it. It’s as if he’d been splattered with a paint brush, moles and freckles of all sizes littering every part of him body—face, chest, back, arms.

Your tongue flicks out, licking over the smooth expanse of skin at his collarbone then sucking on it hard enough to bruise. This was your time to shine and you were marking his body in any way you wished.

A lone kiss was placed against his throat and you felt his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed thickly, your hands gliding over his chest, fingers slipping through his chest hair.

It wasn’t everyone’s taste, but you happened to love and be turned on his chest hair, especially when he wore a polo unbuttoned enough for the top of it to peek out tauntingly. Another single kiss was dropped at the center of his chest.

You kissed each of his pecs, hands sliding up his toned biceps, giving them an appreciative squeeze. He inhaled sharply when he felt your tongue against one nipple, flicking it, but you didn’t stay long.

“You’re perfect,” you mumbled, leaving sweet kisses down his stomach.

“That,” he moaned, your hand brushing teasingly against his bulge, “That would be you, sweetheart.”

His hips lifted as you pulled down his pants and underwear in one go. Your fingers wrapped around his hardened cock, not wasting any time.

“Fuck,” he breathed, “Y/N, you don’t have to-”

But you’d cut him off as your hand glided along his shaft as your tongue ran around his head. Then you peered up at him.

“No one ever takes care of you. Let me.”

A low groan echoed from his chest and he chuckled, breathlessly.

“How can I say no when you’re looking at me like that, beautiful?”

“You can’t,” you smiled wickedly.

The groan that fell from his lips when you wrapped your own around the head of his cock was pure orgasmic. The sound practically traveled from your ears straight south to your clit.

You sucked it lightly, tongue swirling it again before taking more of him in your mouth. Your hand pumped the rest of his velvety length, humming around his cock when you felt his hand tangled in your hair.

“Baby,” came him strangled moan, “Yes, baby.”

Your cheeks hollowed as you increased your suction on him, gliding your mouth along him.

You felt a tug on your hair, but one that was alerting you he wanted your attention. You pulled back looking up at him.

“Tonight’s not the night for me to cum in that pretty little mouth of yours,” he chucked a bit, chest heaving, “C’mere.”

He’d sat up and he pulled you back up to his lap, where you situated yourself. His cock teased your folds, just barely at your entrance, making you whimper.

“If I’m gonna cum,” he whispered, mouth close to yours, “I wanna cum inside you. Maybe put a baby in you.”

You moaned into the kiss as he situated you until you were fully filled with him. You weren’t sure which made you react more, the action or his words. Probably both.

He held you close, hands gliding up your back while your legs rested on the bed on either side of him. You could feel him so deeply, but it was also so incredibly intimate.

You rolled your hips, making him groan.

“Do that again,” he moaned, guiding your hips with a hand.

“Fuck, Steve, you’re incredible,” you sighed, in complete bliss at his tight fit, rubbing against the inside of you in all the right ways.

“Mm, think that’s you,” he argued as he left sweet kisses along your jaw and neck.

You moved your hips forward slowly, just enjoying the closeness on of him, wanting to enjoy the sensation. His forehead dropped to yours as he thrust up into you at the same lackadaisical rhythm.

Hands explored and kisses were shared as you rocked together, only caring for the intimacy in the moment. It felt like more than just your bodies were connected. It felt like your bare souls had connected, entwining in one another just like your limbs. It was an amazing and rewarding feeling, that sense of togetherness.

“Y/N,” he moaned against your mouth, your bodies making the decision for you, picking up the pace.

“I’m right here,” you breathed, a breathy moan leaving your throat as he hit an angle that was spectacularly pleasing.

“I love you,” he mumbled, lips sucking harshly at the base of your neck.

“I love you more,” you answered.

The mutual need for the finishing ecstasy was starting to win as you moved together, trying to reach the destination. Your hands were threaded in his hair, chest pressed as close to his as you could get, head bent back from the overwhelming passion.

“Look at me, baby.”

He was getting close, you could tell by the way he was tensing, his breath starting to become uneven, moans turning more guttural. His biggest give away was the glazed look in his eyes. He was so close to giving in and loosing all control.

Your eyes opened and you looked down in his face. You saw sincerity, you saw passion, but most importantly, you saw love.

“We’re gonna make it,” he whispered to you.

Even if you hadn’t before, you believed him now. Saying it at your most vulnerable moments, close to surrendering yourselves to one another, he believed it. He would make it happen.

And you believed in him, with all your heart.

His hands pressed into your lower back, holding you to him as he repeatedly thrust into you, meeting your hips as they came down on him. Your thighs were trembling and the building cord of pleasure in the pit of your stomach was being stretched so taut, it was going to snap at any time.

“What if I put a baby in you tonight?” came his husky question in your ear, “Fill you up and get you pregnant right now?”

“Steve,” you cried, your inner muscles clamping down on him subconsciously at his words.

He groaned, feeling you squeeze him, your vise like grip just becoming that much tighter.

“Take that as a yes,” he murmured, hand snaking to your clit, rubbing gentle circles that greatly contrasted with his current thrusts.

“Yes,” you moaned, “Yes, Steve, yes.”

Your nails scratched down his back, breathy heavy, so close to tasting that moment of jubilation.

“I love you, baby.”

“Fuck!”

With his words, you came with a cry, face contorted by the insanely strong sensation he’d invoked from you. His moan was just as loud, long and appreciative, the tingling at the base of his spine finally taking over as he spilled into you.

Whether tonight affected your future or not, didn’t matter because right now you and Steve were together and you still would be after tomorrow.

“I love you, too,” you finally answered him, feeling like you could finally speak again.

You remained where you were, him still nestled inside of you and kissed his forehead, his nose, both of his cheeks before kissing him lightly. You felt his smile against your mouth as one hand came to cup your jaw.

You were both recovering from post-coital bliss and he looked as dazed as you felt, but when he parted from your lips, he stroked your cheek with his thumb. His eyes didn’t leave yours as he spoke.

“Whatever happens, Y/N, no matter what, I’ll always be yours.”

[pillow-anime-talk]

his hands.

request: hiii, 1st things first: i love your blog and your writings and i’m currently binging them hahaha. could you write something smutty (hc or scenario; whatever you think fits better) for kakashi or kankuro. can it be a nsfw friends to lovers? like- the reader doesn’t mean to turn them on but they do multiple times and they just snap? (and maybe, you don’t have to but he notices how obsessed the reader is with their hands?) i hope this is not confusing because i don’t even know how to articulate myself. please ignore this if it made you uncomfortable. thank you so much, i hope you’re doing well and take care of yourself :)

# tags: headcanon; friends to lovers / fwb to lovers; romance; smut; jounin!reader; nsfw

warnings: mention of sex and sexual activities, slow sex, fingering, hands kink, a bit of hair pulling

includes: gender neutral reader ft. kakashi hatake {naruto}

author’s note: my, my. kakashi...

↘ You and Kakashi have known each other for many, many years. You have also been working together for many years in higher rank missions, and you often go out for food or walks together when time and place allow it. You are known in the village and beyond as the Two Dragons of Fire and Water. You also compete often, but nevertheless complement each other well, as friends and... definitely someone else.

↘ You have always felt a strange attraction towards a man. You’ve never denied to yourself that he’s handsome, intelligent, funny, and just plain good in his heart. When you needed advice, he always gave it to you. When you needed help, Kakashi would appear next to you within moments. When you were sick, fair-haired always brought you hot ramen soup with your favorite toppings and medicine. And when you felt sad he would always send you letters or jump in through your window asking why you look so strange.

↘ You really, really liked each other, as evidenced by your eternal concentration while talking together and not taking your eyes off each other. Just like now.

↘ You spent time in your apartment that day. After a long mission that lasted three days, you were finally able to rest. So you offered dinner and some wine; Kakashi really liked your simple snacks, and you took pleasure in receiving compliments and valuable comments from him.

↘ You talked a lot that night and dreamed about the future. You talked about your students, plans, families, and you cried a lot about the past. The wine was sweet, yet very strong.

↘ You don’t even remember when the first clothes fell from your body, and the couch became not only a place to eat cold dishes, but also a place for your heavy and hot kisses. Kakashi was definitely a good kisser, and his lips, always hidden behind the material, were extremely soft, sweet and downright pleasant. Especially when his kisses changed their place. Suddenly his lips began to form tender peck against your collarbones, neck and chest.

↘ “You always wear clothes that have strange effects on me. You shouldn’t be doing this.” He said honestly, slowly taking your kimono off you. His cold hands touched your warm body, making you sigh. You always reacted positively to everything about his fingers; after all, they were so slim and neat despite years of work or hard training... You were delighted with them.

↘ You closed your eyes when Kakashi gently placed your body on the sofa and then squeezed one of your thighs with his hands. Then his right hand moved lower and you bit your lip.

↘ As befits a Konoha’s most talented ninja, his fingers and pace were perfect, calm, confident. With blissful peace you gave yourself fully to your lover, and he only watched your facial expressions with a slight smile.

↘ “We’re doing it again, you know?” At one point the man said, and you just opened one of your eyelids, nodding your head slightly in confirmation of his words. “Maybe we’ll just start dating like a normal couple?”

↘ “If that’s what you want... It’ll be fun and interesting.” You smirked slightly, and the blonde one immediately bent over your face, giving you a gentle, sweet kiss right on your lips. Then his hands moved away from your wet spot and he took his own manhood in one hand. He entered you without much trouble, while grasping your hips tightly with his fingers. You groaned  again.

↘ Kakashi’s fingers touched your face, your neck, your both arms. He gently caressed your sensitive areas, and you responded by pulling his hair or leaving visible marks on his back. Sex was lovable, long and incredibly tender. Definitely different from all the previous ones; more intimate.

↘ Your eyes met every few short moments and your breaths merged into one. You tasted wine, you smelled sweat, you felt just good.

↘ It was the first time you felt so close to each other. It was magical and intriguing.

[a-slut-for-smut]

One Big Slutty Fuckoff List of Gloriously Smutty Alutegra fanfics :D

Greetings, fellow Alutegra sluts out there! I am but a humble whore for Alutegra for well over a decade, but finally decided it was high time to curate some of the finest, most exquisite smut of our OG girl boss/malewife ship. What spurred this on, you ask? Welp, I am guilty of sluttily luring in some of my moots aboard this ship and been promising to deliver this for AGES, so here we are years later (sorry i operate on grandma speeds!!!)

A couple things to know regarding this rec list (which may be particularly helpful for curious newcomers, horny vets feel free to scroll on down):

1.) As the title suggests, this is a smutravaganza so mostly is rated E, some M. Sorry folks, im sure there is a ton of amazing non-explicit fics but this is all i read! Also, given the very nature of the series (iirc it originally has hentai roots) it doesnt shy away from sexually kinky themes. Honestly name a kink and its probably not only been explored but likely grounded as far as canon goes. What do i mean by this? I'm only going to name a few but if any of the following get your juices flowin then Alutegra is the ship for you:

Dom/Sub BDSM (emphasis on consent)/Power play vibes- Integra is master, Alucard is her servant. As my boy Oscar Wilde said “Everything in the world is about sex — except sex. Sex is about power.” Honest to God, I don't know any ship that embodies this quote any better.

Bondage- Alucard is first discovered by Integra in a strait jacket/chains etc, and if memory serves me correctly makes several appearances throughout the series

Genderbending/fluidity- well im not sure this is the right term, but in canon Alucard can shapeshift/says he doesn't identify with a specific form/body (whether this applies to gender is up to interpretation i guess?). His "Girlycard" form is generally seen as his female form in the fandom.

Monster porn- Well, Alucard is a vampire and can shapeshift. Including a wolf/dog beast. Sky's the limit folks

Tentacle/cosmic horror porn- Alucard can conjure these shadowy tentacle thingys and a million extra eyes which serves as some sort of relevant symbolism that ive completely forgotten. Shit's hot tho (i got a cosmic horror kink shutup)

Non-penetrative sex & forbidden/taboo vibes- in canon, its established that only virgins can be turned into true vampires, everyone else turns into inhuman mindless ghouls. That said, the authors who write within the bounds of canon find very, VERY creative loopholes. Also the sheer level of pining (for penetration especially) might drive you insane no joke (proof: me). Mad respect to these authors- trust me this is sayin a lot coming from someone who actively prefers full-on penetration smut XD

2.) I am by no means a resource for canon- I watched both series YEARS ago, so my memory of the plot is shaky at best. What truly gripped me about this series is the Alutegra relationship, the true struggle in how to define their bond (or if it even can be, kudos to the fic authors that try). They are both utterly compelling characters in their own right within canon (truthfully I crush harder on Integra than Alucard) and i think the fandom absolutely recognizes that. Much of the gravitas of their bond is tied to canon, so most fics seem to understand/reflect this. No warm fuzzy coffee shop/high school AUs here folks, prepare yourselves for a truly smutty angst fest.

OK enough of that, to the smut! I'm really just commenting on the porn vs the plot so no summaries here. Oh and if any of you know the tumblr URLs of any of these authors lmk so i can tag them. Also im sure ive missed some gems, feel free to share and i'll look to add later

Welp, im going to hell and im taking you all with me- get sinning and enjoy the feast you horny hoes

One-shot porn

What It Wants and Where It Goes - by @crystallinee-waters

Femdom but goddamn its written in a way that made me ache. Alucard's sheer level of contrition, desperation for forgiveness goes beyond your standard simp energy. Top tier, i fucking LOVE how their relationship is depicted. and fun fact, i may have helped the author brainstorm some of the smuttier details <3<3

Mine - by @crystallinee-waters

Goddess at femdom and pining, but holy hell the way how explicit sexual content is approached is just *chefs kiss* I needn't remind you folks- consent is sexy as fuck and this authors fics are proof of that *sidenote - im keeping this list to smut but do yourself a favor and read ALL these authors fics, im a whore for her interpretation of their relationship

In This Darkness, I Have You by @goblins-riddles-or-frocks

What is the point of a vampire/human porn-rec list if you don't include menstrual cunnilingus smut? Also feels. Lots of feels.

Girls & Wolves by Calesvol

mmm hate-sex at its finest folks. Gotta fuck em into obedience yallwhatimsayin??

Homeostasis by Calesvol

A semi-sequel to Girls & Wolves. Very kinky smut but laced with hurt/comfort.

Kingdom of Heaven by Iggy_Lovechild

more hate-sex basically, yay. Also has a shit-ton of smutty one-shots, far too many to list- enjoy

A Queen's Throne by Anilucard

a smutty ode to Alucard's wicked, wicked tongue :D

With the Thorns Underneath by wllw

Holy femdom batman!

Loopholes by @and-i-write-sins

eyyy remember when i mentioned creative loopholes? LOL

you'd make a dead man come by valenstyne

LORD HAVE MERCY! i'll let the fic summary speak for itself: There’s more than one way to stake a vampire. Metaphorically speaking.

Pain by hypnonaut

lol this one just gets progressively kinky as it goes, but Alucard's adoration of Integra is both sweet & sexy

Tentacles of the Night by LaviniaLavender

eyyy remember when i mentioned tentacle porn? LOL

Simple Motions by @ironcladvalkyr

eyyy remember when i mentioned genderbending? but to expand on this this is probably one of the hottest things ive ever read and top tier aftercare/pillow talk

To be watched, in such silence by @ironcladvalkyr

short but smutty, the way Alucard goes on about how Integra turns him on is yums

darling, I wish you were red by @lunarcrystal

yay for cunnilingus and pining!

These fics from Cardinal_Daughter - you have to be logged in to see

Clingy - Timeline of their relationship via Integra POV.

Adore - post-canon angsty smut

Remembered - no smut but this was so achingly angsty i had to shout out

Multi chapter porn

And Though You Turn From Me - by @when-rivers-run-red

THE PINING, THE NOTICE ME SENPAI FEELS, THE TENTACLE PORN AUGHHHHHHHHH this one is a recent favorite folks, do not skip!!!

Eternal Sin by @therustycage

This post-canon multi-fic is one of my favs. Love the Alutegra interactions on how to tackle the obstacles presented in the finale, the pining, and the plot is definitely something to chew on. Slow-burn but tis a good burn

Embracing Sin by @therustycage

Sequel to Eternal Sin. Basically fluffy-porn and time travel. Delicious.

Satis by @lesmismignon

A heavy weight champ of Alutegra post-canon fics. Integra's POV on how she wrestles her feelings for Alucard- just INJECT that shit straight into my veins MMMM! Alucard's pining is top notch/the slow burn makes the smutty bits that much more exquisite. Honestly just read all her fics (one-shots) they're great

The Return by ButifulDeath

Post-canon porn with interesting plot, and fuckin hell dat smut is just *chefs kiss*

Samhain by ButifulDeath

fluffy porn one-shot sequel to The Return and it is hothothot

Like Real People Do by @my-mild-ginger

ahhh so i actually havent read this one yet as its a chonky 40 chapters (currently), seems much more fluff vs smut for those that prefer that balance