#Honestly any day I get to think and talk about Blanky is a good one

[saints-who-never-existed]

sundogs for the terror ask pretty please <3

Sundogs - Talk about a moment in the show that interests you most

With pleasure!

This is more another specific line reading that I love, rather than a moment that interests me, but I hope you'll indulge me as I talk about it anyway. ;)

I really really love Blanky's choice of words in his final scene with Crozier and I think it speaks perfectly to his character in general.

He's not just going to lead Tuunbaq back out onto the ice. He's not going to coax or lure or trick it somehow. Thomas 'Motherfucker Unlimited' Blanky is going to DRIVE the poor bastarding thing out onto the ice and away from those he cares about.

That word - DRIVE - is so powerful and special to me! It's active and purposeful! I feel like it lets you know right then and there that although Blanky may be going willingly to his death, he sure as shit is not going to go without a fight!

DRIVE, for lack of a better word, has drive!

(I also so wonder how deliberate it is for him to push to return to the ice specifically. So much of his career and life was defined by it. He was passionate about it, perhaps even loved it so it would make painful but perfect sense to me for him to want to experience the ice one last time.)

[daincrediblegg]

Two questions: top 5 things that the Inexperienced Jared Observer should watch him in

Which Terror ep would you rate as Thee best and why?

OOOH HO HO AND I SHALL ANSWER WITH GUSTO Ok. Barring the obvious three choices (i.e. Foundation, The Terror, and Chernobyl, which are really the biggest powerhouses of Jared's acting abilities to date, and then the tier two shows: Carnival Row, Mad Men (it is a very good show overall but if you're there just for jared it takes a while to get to him and it takes a LONG time to get over him), and The Crown), these are my recommendations:

Certain Women His part in this movie is very short, but honestly. it really shows how much this man can do with such a little character, really proving the "no small parts only small actors" adage that folks like to throw around. I still think about him a lot. really showed such a range with so little and it baffles me to this day. Also it's an anthologized narrative and his part and also Lily Gladstone's role in it (her first film role ever btw) as being a horse lesbian with Kristen Stewart really makes it worth the watch a lot more than some of the other bit part things I've seen him in.

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows I genuinely think he's my favorite Moriarty of all time. Full stop. he's just such a wicked delight, and it will forever make me curse Guy Ritchie for only giving him bit parts in some of his other films. absolutely criminal.

The Devil's Violinist @prismatica-the-strange and I absolutely did not go into this film expecting it to be as good as it is. we thought it was gonna be a flop. that Jared Harris was gonna play the devil and we'd have a laugh and that would be that. Incorrect. Turns out the guy playing Paganini is actually a bonafide child prodigy violinist and he blows a LOT of the musician biopic performances out of the water because he REALLY DO BE PLAYING THAT VIOLIN LIKE THAT. Oh and also Jared plays his manager who is literally the devil and he has a pincer beard. and he's a sarcastic little shit and he's just a delight.

Two of Us This was genuinely the first film that made Jared a lifelong stand-out name to me at age fourteen. iykyk. He also fulfilled every McLennon shipper's dreams with this movie by kissing Aidan Quinn full on the lips. So if you want an explanation of why he queer codes a lot of his roles, this is it.

It's really hard to choose between The Beast Must Die, The Quiet Ones, and the 2015 Poltergeist remake, so I suppose I'm gonna go with The Beast Must Die because he's a saucy little asshole and he absolutely looks the prettiest in that. But that's the bitch of it with : this man has made a career of making himself a highlight no matter what kind of bit part you throw at him, so like honestly anything in his filmography is worth watching. But yeah he's so pretty in the beast must die. That's all I got. As for the second question... man why can't I choose all of em? why??? 😭😭😭 I can't pit all these bad bitch episodes against each other at any given moment in time man. I love this show too much. I simply cannot choose. it's all so good. I would like to say it's ep 5 for the way jared acts drunkenly (best drunken performance I've ever seen in my entire life), but then I think about him on the gunwale with blanky talking about the reindeer and laughing and how much Jared literally changed from the script to make that moment so goddamn endearing and human. but then I also remember the moment blanky leaves him like??? DUDE. I can't. I cannot choose. my favorite episode is the whole show.

[daisychainsandbowties]

weirder asks if you please: 1, 23, 29, 42, 44

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

i have Many, unfortunately, but the main ones are 

lilith, because she’s incredible and poetic and tall and she scares me. i’m comforted by her as a character with an aborted destiny, who is not what she was meant to be, but still alive, & dealing with the cost of (still) being alive. 

beatrice. i mean… damn she’s just everything to me. her gentleness and her harshness and the way it feels to write her. i think she’s one of my favourite narrative voices to work with - not even her POV but just what she does to any scene. she’s such a beautiful person & it changes everything, changes the structure of language in some indefinable way. mwah love her. 

obi wan kenobi. HE’S BABY. i just love him & there are too many reasons why but phantom menace obi and his little braid were Gender to me as a kid. profoundly gender. hoping to grow into mullet obi some day, if i am fortunate. 

obvioulsy Mo from wot. like she makes me want to rip up the trees by their roots like i’m an orc doing landscaping for Saruman but she’s!!! talk about a tectonic shift in my psyche at age single-digits when i first read EoTW. i was there with Rand & Mat in the Bad Bird scene going ‘if she asked me to do anything, then that is what i would do.’ but oh i never get tired of reading about her i just love her & she’s kind of a fixture of multiple points in my life bc i kept going back to her (& wot) like a boat into harbour. moiraine is possibly THE comfort character (tragic for me that she’s Like That. so not relaxing to be around) 

Nona from the Book of the Ancestor series. she’s autistic, she’s covered in (her own) blood half the time. she would die for her friends. she’s got a devil in her. she’s just!!!! very soft but also so dangerous & she has something gay going on with at least four of her friends and i think that’s heroic of her. 

Captain Laurence from the His Majesty’s Dragon series. he’s just the softest boi. he has a dragon the size of a small manor house & he calls said dragon ‘my dear’. what else is there to say? 

& this one is obscure but Celestia Stardust from the dnd podcast Flintlocks and Fireballs. i also love Scamp from that because they were the character who helped me figure out my favourite pronouns & also they’re a pink demon-child who once turned into a potted plant and accidentally started the French Revolution. but Celestia is the gay disaster bard, and you know i love a disaster. she’s ridiculously tall, she once rolled a nat 20 to walk through a door. her family are the worst people in the world but her sister is (tragically) kind of sexy. she nearly dies like every episode because she started the campaign with a negative con modifier (like, darling). she also says darling a lot which…. i’m fine. 

ok there are Loads truly but i’ll stop. basically the more autistic and soft and disastrous they are the more i love them. 

23. how do you feel about chilly weather?

ah see it’s a conundrum bc i am smol and therefore have no natural defence from the cold. it will be 12 degrees celsius and i will be featured in the google image results of the word ‘icicle’

BUT i also enjoy being wrapped in blankies and wearing multiple hoodies and fluffy socks (but, to be clear, i am a tough guy) so the cold is generally a good time for me. also i hate fruit flies. cannot even explain my loathing. this is why me & spiders are in alliance, why if no one got me, spiders got me. so cold = no fruit flies. ghdkslkd honestly i’d like hot weather a lot more if i had top surgery because i would be like ‘shirt WHO??’ but alas… 

29. how do you like your shower water?

shower water must be scalding. some of us have Raynaud’s Syndrome. (also yea the urge to respond with 'wet')

42: an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?

oh definitely google docs. me and my 10,000 iterations of ‘untitled document’ have to spend quality time together at least once every five minutes

44: you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?

hmm there are a couple of people i WOULD kill but in most of those cases they’re surrounded by other cunts people who would step up and assume almost exactly the same role, so it’d really have to be someone i felt was uniquely harmful, in a way that’s individual to them in some way. probably i would think maybe some billionaire (and yeah, i am thinking of one in particular but it feels a bit too personal maybe. but def Looking just over the sea) or anyone responsible for an inordinate amount of environmental harm. it’s probably slightly boring, but i think in general not much can be prevented by killing one person (no actual real-world ta’veren & all that)

[tinytinybumblebee]

sometimes Izzy is just.... a naughty baby. sometimes he doesn't feel like being a good boy or like playing with the other kids, he's upset that he can't do his jobs like he usually does and that everyone treats him different and doesn't let him properly help out.

throwing tantrums, of course, doesn't really help with people not taking him seriously, but he's already too upset at that point to really care.

Someone cuts up his food for him? food goes on the floor. Someone suggests nap time? he'll scream loud enough to keep the entire ship awake and distracted. the second someone calls him any pet name he instantly tells them "Fuck off!", which gets him a longer timeout that usual, and he doesn't stop swearing for a good while, which leaves a very unimpressed Stede and Ed.

Awww oh my goodness :^0000

Sometimes he just wants to be baby but also still be treated like a big boy in some senses! So, many tantrums and fits with Izzy when he is in this mindset- which, honestly amuses some of the crew, but the ones that are actually taking care of him, it's certainly,,a time xD

And it's tricky to even talk to him because he becomes defensive and thinks they're baby talking him- lil dude is in this "I want to be naughty" mindset and gentle parenting isn't gonna stop that! Ed probably is like "okay, you want to be a big boy? Then I guess you won't be wanting this," he says as he begins folding up Izzy's blankie that, to be fair, Izzy did just whine about how that's only for babies, "and, since you're such a big boy today, you can help Mr.Button with navigation and help Fang with cleaning up the last raid's items."

Izzy just blinks for a moment before heading out of the cabin.

Stede is like, "Ed, isn't this a bit harsh??? He's just having a bit of a naughty day, this might do more harm than good."

But Ed just leans in a bit and is like, "Nah, just give him a second."

And sure enough, a couple minutes later, Izzy is peeking around the door, with that slightly defeated look.

"Awe whatcha doung back mate? Thought I gave you your orders, that's what you wanted wasn't it? To get your big boy task?"

Izzy just pouts as he goes to Stede and huffs that maybe he's not a big boy, at least, not big enough to steer a ship. Stede coddles Izzy while Ed comes over and hums as he rest his hand on Izzy's shoulder.

"Then maybe we can try to tone down the naughtiness, yeah? 'Least, not trying to bite or swear at the other crewmates when they're just trying to be nice to you, sound fair?"

Izzy just nods and pouts xD Knowing that when Ed-Ed puts his foot down, he can't naughty his way out of it

[dirtykpopsnaps]

End of Year Stress — Han Jisung

Warnings: N/A

Contains: Han’s stressed out boyfriend and some subspace stuff

Requested: yes

Words: 959 (sorry this is so short, darling🥺😖)

————————————————————————

I stare at the laptop screen in front of me, my head spinning with information. In the other room, I can hear my boyfriend, Han, and his group mates talking and laughing. Trying to focus back on the work, I look back at my laptop screen and sigh. The blinking curser on the page is almost hypnotizing. This paper is due in a few days and I still have so much to do for it. Not to mention, I have at least six more assignments to do over the weekend. There’s so much work to do and it doesn’t seem like I’ll ever be able to finish it all.

Groaning in annoyance, I flop my head down on my arms. There is just so much going on. Classes are ending in a couple weeks and all my teachers are dropping work every other day. I feel like I haven’t had a true break in at least a week. There’s so many projects and assignments that are due that I can’t even think straight. My mind is being overloaded with information from all of my different classes and I feel completely exhausted.

Just thinking about all the work I have to do, I feel myself start to get emotional. My eyes start prickling and my breathing becomes shallower. I have so much to do and yet I can’t focus enough to even write another paragraph of this paper. If I try to work on any other assignment, I won’t be able to focus and I’ll just get more upset at myself. The tears slip down onto my arms as I let myself break down. Honestly, with how much work I’ve been doing lately, I’m surprised it took this long. My body shakes slightly as the quiet sobs wrack my body.

From behind me, I suddenly hear someone speak up. “Whoa, Y/N, are you okay?” Seungmin asks, walking into the room and kneeling next to me. I lift up my head, sniffling and wipe away my falling tears.

“I’m just...stressed. There’s a lot of work and I can’t focus,” I explain, my voice shaking slightly. Seungmin nods his head silently then looks over his shoulder.

“I’m...gonna get Han,” he says quietly. I sniffle again and nod my head. Immediately, he turns on his heel and hurries out of the room.

From the other room, I can hear a short conversation. Seconds later, Han runs into the room and kneels next to me. Tears are still running down my face and I’ve started to hiccup slightly. Han lets out a soft sigh and presses the top of my laptop closed. He takes one of my hands in his. “No more work for now. Okay, baby boy? You need to take a break,” he tells me. I nod my head softly, pushing out my bottom lip.

“I...I should’ve been able to do more,” I whine, tears falling again. I can feel myself quickly falling into subspace. Han shakes his head, wiping away my tears.

“No, you’ve done enough for now. You need a break,” he says plainly. I sniffle again, nodding my head and squeeze his hand softly.

“Okay,” I mumble.

Humming softly, Han tugs at my hand. I knit my eyebrows together, but he just tugs at my hand again. Slowly, I get to my feet and, once I’m up, Han positions himself to pick me up. I smile softly, climbing into his arms. This is something that happens fairly often with us. He knows that I like to be carried and held, so whenever I’m having a hard time, he’ll do that. Han picks me up in his arms, carrying me into the room with the other members. Seungmin is sitting on the couch, his eyes trained on me as Han walks over.

“Is he okay?” Hyunjin asks. Han nods his head lightly and sets me down on the opposite couch.

“Yeah, he’s okay. Just stressed out with school,” he explains.

Once I’m positioned on the couch, I wrap my arms around my legs. The tears have stopped, but my face still feels wet and I’m sniffling every few seconds. Han sighs softly and bites his lip, thinking. “Do you want a blankie or your stuffie?” He asks me softly. I nod my head slightly and lean against his shoulder.

“Can I have both?” I mumble. Han smiles softly, pressing a kiss to my head.

“Of course you can, baby boy,” he assures me. Han steps away for a second and comes back with a big blanket, wrapping it around my shoulder. “What stuffie do you want?” He asks.

“I wan’ narwhal,” I mumble, wrapping my hands in my blanket and pulling it up to my chin. Han nods his head and walks back towards his room in the dorm. He keeps a bunch of my stuffies there for when I sleepover.

When he returns, he has my squishy narwhal plush with him. Han gives me the stuffed animal and I hug it to my chest. Calmly, Han climbs onto the couch and positions himself behind me. Once he’s comfortable, he wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me to his chest. I snuggle against his warm chest, hugging my narwhal. “Baby?” Han asks softly. I look up and meet his eyes.

“Hmm?” I hum in response.

“You’re doing really good. I know you’ve been stressed lately. Just rest and take a break for now,” he tells me. I sigh and nod my head softly, resting my head against his chest. Han smiles softly and runs his fingers through my hair, his eyes focusing on the tv show playing.

Taking deep breaths, I close my eyes and let myself fall asleep on his chest. I honestly really needed a break.

[bibbawrites]

Made Your Mark On Me, a Golden Tattoo - Single Dad!Charlie x Owen

THIS IS PART 10 OF THE SINGLE DAD!CHARLIE SERIES, YOU CAN FIND THE OTHER PARTS HERE

Request: none

Word Count: 3760 words

Summary: Part 10 of Single Dad!Charlie, Owen comes to LA to stay with Charlie, Margaux and Meghan, and the boys go on their first date

Warnings: swearing, sexual references, implied sexual content pretty sure everyone knows at this point but this does include romantic chowen, remember this is fictional, if you dont like that just dont read :)

A/N: another day another part lol, i have far too much written for this series considering there is no demand for it but i’m enjoying it so i’m gonna keep writing purely just for @happinessinthedarkesttimes​ and myself lol also! a new nickname for margaux has been unlocked haha she has far too many cause every person keeps giving her their own nickname and ive lost count of how many there are... anyways, enjoy! 

Tag List:  @happinessinthedarkesttimes @molinaroberts @joynersgoatblog @courageous-she​ @littlemissaddict @gloomybrieyxb​ @itsyagorlemmalyn @jatpxmultifan​ @moneybagmgk​ @emeliii1​ @mybradforddream​ (the strike through means it wont let me tag you)

Char sent a message to OPJ

Char owweeeennnnnnnnnnn

Char come to la

OPJ why?

Char i miss you

Char wanna kiss your pretty face

Char and your pretty lips

Char and your pretty 🍆

OPJ charlieeeeeee

Char what? i did nothing wrong

OPJ you just said you wanna suck my dick

Char i never said such a thing

Char read the messages, i only said i would like to kiss your pretty face and your pretty lips and your pretty 🍆

OPJ and we all know what that emoji means

Char get your head out of the gutter honestly

Char maybe i just love eggplant

OPJ ugh whatever

Char so will you?

OPJ will i what?

Char come to la

Char we’ve been officially boyfriends for almost three months and we haven’t even had our first date yet

OPJ when do you want me

Char right now

OPJ that’s not possible bub

Char bub?

OPJ trying something, yes or no?

Char meh i don’t hate it

OPJ i’ll keep looking then

Char anyways, i booked you a flight...

OPJ char you didn’t have to

Char i know i’m just so desperate to see you

OPJ what time and day?

Char ...

Char today 3pm...

OPJ it’s 11am now

Char you better get packing

OPJ already am 

Char oh i know you are ;)

OPJ i didnt mean it like that and you know it

OPJ you’re gonna be the death of me Gillespie

Char i know ❤️

-

The second Charlie spotted Owen exiting the gate he was jumping into the blond’s arms, glad that they both had masks on to prevent him from kissing Owen senseless with hundreds of people around.

“God I missed you.” He muttered, face pressed into Owen’s neck. 

“I missed you more.” Owen replied, pulling back slightly. “Where’s Maggie?”

“With Meghan. She’s visiting for a little bit so she offered to look after her while I came to get you.” Charlie explained, grabbing Owen’s carry on as they headed through the airport to baggage claim. 

“Is she staying with you?” Owen asked. 

“She is, but I may or may not have booked the four of us into a hotel for a few days. She leaves on Thursday so if you wanna stay after that we’ll just go back to my place.” Charlie said. 

“We’re staying in a hotel?” Owen grinned, coming to a stop at the baggage carousel, his eyes focused on looking for his suitcase. 

“Yeah! Mags is pumped, she loves hotels, especially high rise ones. We’re going back to mine to collect the two of them then we’ll head there.” Charlie said

“Does Meghan know about...” Owen trailed off, glancing over at Charlie who shook his head. 

“I didn’t tell her, I wanted to find out what you wanted to do first.” Charlie replied. Owen smiled. 

“I’m okay with telling her.” He said. 

“Or maybe we just act like a couple around her and see how long it takes her to notice.” Charlie suggested and Owen shook his head. 

“You’re evil.” He spotted his bag, leaving Charlie’s side for a few moments before coming back over, his suitcase trailing behind him. 

“Don’t think it will take long, cause the second that front door shuts behind us I’m gonna be all over you.” Charlie grinned, taking Owen’s free hand once the younger boy was back by his side, leading him out of the airport. Owen blushed slightly. 

“Can’t wait.”

-

True to his word, the second that the door was shut Charlie was shoving Owen against the wall and kissing him with so much force that he thought his lips might bleed.

“Fuck, missed you so much.” Charlie mumbled against Owen’s lips, groaning when Owen’s fingers dug into his hips.

“Char...” Owen gasped out and Charlie just kissed him harder, wanting to make up for lost time.

“When you’re done trying to swallow each other, we’re in the kitchen.” Meghan’s voice called and Charlie groaned, stepping back from Owen. He didn’t want to stop, but he knew if they kept going they wouldn’t be able to.

“We should go to them.” He said, and Owen nodded, still slightly stunned from the aggression of the kiss.

“Probably.” He agreed, but neither of them made any attempt to move, so Charlie nuzzled his face into Owen’s neck, just taking in the familiar scent of his boyfriend. 

“This hotel, how is the room situation going?” Owen asked, his hand trailing through Charlie’s hair. Charlie lifted his head up.

“I booked a two bedroom suite. Margaux and Meghan can share one room and we’ll take the other.” He said. Owen smiled. 

“Okay good.” He replied. Charlie raised an eyebrow. 

“Why?” He asked. 

“Remember your texts?” Owen smirked, and Charlie’s eyes widened at the realisation. 

“Don’t be so horny.” He muttered, hitting at Owen’s arm. Owen grinned. 

“Says the guy who just had me pressed up against a wall.” He retaliated. 

“We can hear you, you know that right?” Meghan called, and both Charlie and Owen froze. 

“We did not.” Charlie called back, and both boys decided that was their cue to head into the kitchen, where Meghan and Margaux were waiting.  

“Papa!” Margaux exclaimed the second they entered the room, jumping down off her chair and rushing over to Owen, jumping into his arms. Meghan gave Charlie a look, eyebrows raised. 

“So, finally got your shit together then?” She questioned. Charlie glanced towards Owen and Margaux, a smile appearing on his face when he saw the way the four year old was clinging to the blond boy. 

This was how things were supposed to be. 

- 

Less than an hour later the family of four had checked into their home for the next few days and travelled up to the fourteenth floor to find their room. 

Once they found it Charlie tapped the keycard against the door and pushed on the handle when the light changed to green. Margaux pushed past him, running into the room and heading straight towards the door to the balcony, pressing her face into the glass. 

“Woah!” She exclaimed, standing on her toes to try to see the road below. 

“Good view?” Charlie asked, placing the bags he was carrying down on the couch, before opening the door and letting Margaux out onto the balcony, trailing closely behind her as Margaux rushed over to the railing. 

“Look Daddy.” She grinned as Charlie squatted down behind her, placing a hand on her back gently. 

“Wow look how tiny those people are.” Charlie said, and Margaux giggled. 

“They’re ants!” She replied, leaning back into Charlie. 

“For someone who travels as much as she does you’d think she’d be used to it by now.” Meghan joked quietly to Owen as the two of them stood and watched the interaction.

“Especially since we lived in an apartment building in Vancouver while we filmed.” Owen replied. 

“Kids.” Meghan shook her head in amusement.

“You wanna see your room baby?” Charlie questioned, and Margaux nodded excitedly. 

“Okay let’s figure it out.” Charlie stood back up, taking Margaux’s hand and leading her back into the main room. 

“Am I gonna stay with you Daddy?” Margaux asked, and Charlie shook his head. 

“No you’re gonna stay with Meggy.” He said, motioning towards his younger sister. 

“It’s gonna be like a sleepover.” Meghan grinned. Margaux pouted. 

“But I wanna stay with Daddy.” She whined. 

“You’ll be with Daddy until you have to go to sleep, okay?” Charlie told her, pushing open the door, revealing the room with the two double beds.

“And look at this nice big bed you get to stay in all by yourself. You can fit all of your toys around you.” He added, and Margaux frowned but didn’t protest. 

“Which bed do you want Mini? The window one?” Meghan questioned. 

Margaux glanced at the beds before nodding. Charlie placed her bag onto the bed, unzipping it to reveal the several stuffed toys and dolls they had packed.

“Look, we’ll put all your friends on your bed.” He said as he placed the toys out onto the bed, pulling out Margaux’s blanket last. “And your blankie, and look how nice this looks. You’ll have so much fun sleeping here.”

“And we can even sing with each other at night, or gossip about secret girl stuff.” Meghan added, sitting on the edge of her own bed. 

“What girl stuff?” Margaux questioned, climbing up next to her aunt and snuggling into her arms. 

“Butterflies and glitter.” Charlie joked, and Owen rolled his eyes at the reference, turning and leaving the room as a response.

“We’ll stay up all night talking about boys.” Meghan grinned and Charlie’s smile instantly turned into a frown. 

“Hey! No.” He reprimanded.

“I’m joking Charlie, don’t be a party pooper.” Meghan rolled her eyes. 

“You joke, but we had a full conversation a month ago about how someone wants a boyfriend.” Charlie said, and Margaux looked up. 

“I want a boyfriend.” She chimed in. Meghan laughed. 

“You’re four, why do you need a boyfriend?” She asked. Margaux frowned. 

“Daddy has a boyfriend.” She stated. Meghan smirked, looking up at Charlie. 

“Does he now?” She teased. 

“Shut the fuck up, you knew that. You literally just asked if I had gotten my shit together.” Charlie said, and Meghan rolled her eyes at him. 

“You didn’t confirm it.” She retorted. Charlie shook his head. 

“Hey Meghan, Owen’s my boyfriend.” He stated, ignoring the flutter in his chest at those words. 

“Wow! Thank you so much for telling me, that’s so nice of you!” Meghan replied, her tone thick with sarcasm. 

“Don’t be sarcastic.” Charlie retaliated. 

“What’s that Taylor Swift lyric? The one about looking at him like the stars, that’s you and him. It’s honestly about time that you got your shit together.” Meghan said, flopping backwards onto her bed, giggling when Margaux climbed on top of her. 

“Tay’s my boyfriend.” The tiny blonde stated and Charlie sighed.

“Who?” Meghan shot him a confused look. 

“Taylor Kare. Who played the young version of Bobby in the show. For some reason she’s decided she wants him to be her boyfriend.” Charlie explained. Meghan grinned. 

“I don’t blame her, he’s cute.” She said. Charlie shot her a look and she rolled her eyes before sitting up, Margaux clinging to her like a koala. 

“Hey Mini, why don’t we go get some food and bring it back while your Daddy unpacks all of your stuff.” Meghan suggested. Margaux smiled. 

“Yeah! Can we get KFC?” She asked. 

“Of course we can.” Meghan grinned, before turning to Charlie. “Want anything?”

“Just get one of those big buckets of chicken and we’ll figure it out.” He said as Meghan stood up, grabbing her mask. 

“Okay. I’m stealing your wallet.” She told him. 

“Of course you are.” Charlie rolled his eyes, but handed his wallet over to his younger sister nonetheless, before leaning in to kiss Margaux gently on the side of her head. 

“Bye baby, have fun and be good for Meggy, okay?” He said. Margaux nodded. 

“Bye Daddy, love you.” She replied. 

“Love you too.” Charlie smiled. 

Meghan and Margaux left, the four year old chattering away in her aunty’s arms about something she had seen in Bluey, and Charlie waited until he couldn’t hear their voices anymore to move. 

“Owen?” He called, starting to head across the suite to the room he and Owen were sharing. 

“Yeah?” Owen called back. Charlie pushed open the door, finding a much larger room with a large king size bed in the middle of the room, and a flat screen tv hung on the wall. Owen was unpacking his bag, hanging clothes in the wardrobe, when Charlie entered. 

“Meg and Mags went to get food.” Charlie told him. 

“Okay cool.” Owen replied, looking up after a few moments and frowning when he saw the look on Charlie’s face. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Remember the texts?” Charlie raised an eyebrow and Owen’s eyes lit up. 

“Come here.” He said, but Charlie didn’t move. 

“We’ve gotta be quick.” Charlie informed him and Owen nodded. 

“Got it.”

And with that Charlie rushed over to Owen, kicking the door shut behind him.

-

They were a naked mess of sweaty bodies and tangled limbs when Charlie decided to bring up their plans for the night. 

“Oh by the way, I have our date planned.” He said as Owen played with his hair. 

“Am I allowed to know what it is? Or when?” Owen questioned. Charlie nodded slightly. 

“Tonight. At 10:30pm.” He informed the blonde. “And it’s a surprise.” 

“10:30?” Owen repeated. Charlie hummed in response. Owen sighed. 

“That’s all I’m getting?”

“Yep.” Charlie murmured. 

“We’re back!” Meghan’s voice called through the suite and both Charlie and Owen jumped up in fear. 

“Fuck, get dressed.” Charlie instructed, tossing clothes towards Owen, before calling back to Meghan. “Coming!”

In record time they were both dressed and came out of the bedroom, trying to look as casual as possible as they walked over to the table where Meghan had placed all the food. 

“Daddy, you didn’t unpack my stuff.” Margaux pouted, and Charlie placed a soft kiss on the top of her head as an apology. 

“Sorry baby, Daddy got distracted.” He told her as he grabbed some food for her and put it on one of the plates Owen had brought over to the table. 

“Oh gross, you didn’t.” Meghan groaned, glancing between Charlie and Owen, who had turned a bright red in embarrassment. Charlie just shrugged, a guilty smile on his face. Meghan fake gagged. 

“That’s disgusting Char.” She reprimanded. Charlie shook his head. 

“It’s natural.” He retaliated. Meghan hit him. 

“Shut up, I don’t want to know anything else.” She said. The table fell silent for a moment, before Margaux decided to speak up. 

“Daddy we saw a puppy when we were walking.” She grinned, and Charlie pulled a shocked face. 

“Oh my gosh, really? Tell me all about it.” He replied, and for the entire meal Margaux rambled, telling them story after story. 

-

Just before 10:30, Charlie and Owen arrived at their date destination. Owen looked up at the sign, frowning slightly when he saw it. 

“A tattoo parlour?” He questioned. Charlie smiled, despite the fact that Owen couldn’t see it through his mask. 

“You’ve been talking about getting a new tattoo, so I figured we could get a new one together.” He suggested. Owen’s frown melted, a soft look replacing it. 

“Why is that oddly sweet?” He teased, leaning his head into Charlie’s shoulder. Charlie grinned. 

“Cause I’m oddly sweet?” He replied. Owen laughed. 

“That you are.” 

“Do you have any ideas of what you wanna get?” Charlie questioned as he held the door open. Owen gave him a small smile, walking through the door as he answered. 

“I have a couple of ideas.” He said. “Things that I think would look cool.” 

“Oh yeah? Like what?” Charlie’s eyes lit up with curiosity. Owen shook his head. 

“Secret. Want it to be a surprise.” He grinned. Charlie chuckled. 

“Fair enough.” 

After going through the basics and signing some paperwork, it was time for them to get their tattoos. The tattoo artist led them through to the backroom and for the whole time they were there Charlie and Owen didn’t once let go of each other’s hands. 

- 

The two boys left the tattoo parlour a few hours later, hand in hand and new tattoos covered in a protective cling film. 

“Do you wanna head back?” Charlie questioned, swinging their hands between them. Owen sighed. 

“Not really, but we probably should. It’s late.” He answered. Charlie nodded in agreement. 

“True. Plus the date doesn’t have to end just because we go back to the hotel... There’s a nice comfy bed and some red wine with our names on it.” He raised an eyebrow and Owen smiled. 

“Fancy.” 

“Only the best for you.” Charlie grinned, and Owen pulled him close, pulling down their masks so that their lips could meet in a rough kiss. 

And if it took them almost an hour to make the 15 minute walk back to the hotel then that was just between them. 

-

Charlie unlocked the door to the hotel room and pushed it open, frowning when he spotted Margaux sat on the ground, staring out the window at the city lights.  

“Why are you still awake Mags?” He asked as he pulled off his mask, drawing the four year old’s attention to them. 

“Missed you.” She said softly, her voice wobbling. 

“Oh baby, come here.” Charlie squatted down and the four year old ran into his arms, burying her face in his neck. Owen nodded towards their bedroom and Charlie gave him a small smile to let the younger boy know he understood. 

“You were gone but you said you wouldn’t go.” Margaux mumbled. 

“You knew I was gonna go out with Papa for a little bit, remember? It’s okay, I’m back, and I promise I’m not going anywhere. Okay?” He tangled his hand through her curls and the four year old hummed in response. 

“Okay.” She agreed, her voice no louder than a whisper. Thinking quickly, Charlie decided the best course of action would be distraction. 

“Hey, you wanna see Daddy’s new tattoos?” He asked, and Margaux nodded, moving back slightly. Charlie smiled at her. 

“First I got this one here.” He lifted his arm to show her the heart tattoo on his ribcage, the plastic mostly obscuring it. 

“And I got this one here for my favourite person in the whole entire world.” He finished, showing her the tiny cursive M inked into his wrist.

“An M for Margaux, so I always have you with me.” He said, and she peered at the tiny ink on his wrist, a small smile appearing on her face. 

“I like it.” She told him. “Can I have one?” Charlie laughed.

“When you’re all grown up, okay?” He replied, ruffling her hair. 

“Okay.” She agreed. They fell silent, and Charlie was just about to suggest that it was time for Margaux to hop into her bed when she spoke up again. 

“Daddy?” Her voice sounded small. 

“Yeah baby?” Charlie replied. 

“Can I sleep with you tonight?” Margaux questioned, already leaning back into his arms. 

“Of course baby. You got Mr Penguin?” He asked. 

She held the penguin up and Charlie grinned.

“Great, let’s go.” 

He stood up, taking her spare hand to lead her towards the bedroom, pushing the door open to where Owen was sat, already in bed with Netflix loaded on the TV. 

“Papa! I’m gonna sleep here with you.” Margaux exclaimed, diving onto the bed as Owen raised an eyebrow, looking towards Charlie with a knowing look.

“Oh really? What about your bed?” He asked.

“She was sad.” Charlie pouted, and Owen just shook his head. 

“Come on baby, in you get.” Charlie said, letting the four year old climb into the bed before climbing in after her, grinning when she settled into his arms, her head on his chest. 

It didn’t take long for her to fall asleep, and once she did, Owen spoke up, his voice soft. 

“You know one day you gotta stop letting her climb into bed with you.” He whispered. Charlie made a noise in response, his eyes never once leaving Margaux. 

“One day... just not today.” He replied. 

“The longer you give in the harder it’s gonna be for you. Cause I know it’s as much you as it is her.” Owen said, and Charlie sighed, his fingers tangled through Margaux’s curls as the four year old slept peacefully in his arms. 

“I know.” He started. “I just...” 

Owen reached out, linking his hand through one of Charlie’s and giving it a light squeeze. 

“It’s stupid.” Charlie mumbled. Owen moved slightly, placing a kiss on the side of Charlie’s head. 

“I’m sure it’s not.” He assured the older boy. Charlie was silent for a moment before talking. 

“She’s just always been with me and has always needed me to do everything for her, and now she’s getting older and she can do all of these things on her own, and I just get worried that she’s not gonna need me any more, or she’ll decide that she doesn’t want these nights where she asks to sleep with me.” He rambled. 

“You’re her dad. She’s always gonna need you Char.” Owen assured him. Charlie hummed in response, and Owen took that as a sign to change the topic, a small smile appearing on his face. 

“So I’m guessing no post date make out session or red wine.” He joked, and Charlie sighed. 

“Sorry.” He muttered. Owen rolled his eyes, snuggling as close to Charlie as he could get without disturbing Margaux. 

“I was joking Char.” He said, and Charlie moved to place a soft kiss on Owen’s lips. 

“I had a really good time tonight.” Owen whispered against Charlie’s lips and Charlie smiled. 

“Me too.” He agreed. 

“Do we have any plans tomorrow?” Owen inquired, and Charlie paused for a moment. 

“Not that I know of. Why? Have something in mind?” He moved back slightly so that he could look at Owen’s face. 

“I thought maybe the four of us could go play mini golf or something like that?” Owen suggested. Charlie smiled. 

“That sounds like a lot of fun.” He answered. They fell into a comfortable silence, both boys closing their eyes, but there was something that Charlie knew he had to say. He opened his eyes and took a deep breath before speaking.  

“Hey Owen?” He whispered. Owen opened his eyes, focusing on Charlie instantly. 

“Yeah?” He questioned. Charlie smiled. 

“I love you.” He murmured. Owen smiled, rubbing his nose against Charlie’s. 

“Love you too Char.” He replied. Charlie shook his head. 

“No... I’m in love with you.” He clarified. Owen’s jaw dropped slightly, but he recovered quickly. 

“I’m in love with you too.” He returned, and Charlie lent in to kiss him gently. 

“It scares me.” Owen whispered once they pulled apart. “How much I love you.” 

“Honestly, me too. But we’re in this together. And I love you as much as you love me, so don’t overthink it, okay?” Charlie replied.

“Okay.” Owen agreed. 

“We should get some sleep.” Charlie said after a moment and Owen nodded, placing once last kiss to Charlie’s lips. 

“Sounds good. I love you.” He whispered, and Charlie could already feel himself drifting off as he whispered a response. 

“I love you too Owen.” 

[slow-burn-sally]

Why I ship it so hard. A completely unasked for breakdown of my deep and abiding love for Thomas Jopson and his deep and abiding love for Captain Francis Crozier

I am lonely on this little rarepair ship and have been left with no alternative than to scream into the void about all my feelings. And my feelings are that Captain’s steward Thomas Jopson is deeply in love with Francis Crozier.

Crozier: “Not only must you draw the tightest possible curtain around what is happening, but you must also care for me, as I will not be able to care for myself.” 

The camera focuses in immediately on Jopson’s face. His eyes are trained steadily on his Captain. He’s already completely, 100% dedicated to doing whatever Crozier needs. 

The other officers are looking at Crozier with confusion, worry, discomfort. Not Jopson though. The very next thing out of his mouth is:

This was actually the first time I really noticed Jopson. Yes, you see him helping the Captain dress, snipping that thread on Crozier’s sleeve with his teeth (a very good example of the level of intimacy between them). And you see Jopson in the background, serving the officers their dinner. Fetching chairs for people to sit in. He’s sort of a muted character until this moment. His only real standout quality is that he’s astoundingly pretty.

Then we get a front row seat for how completely dedicated he is to his Captain’s well being during this scene at the end of ep 5, and the convalescing scene in ep 6. How he gently and carefully combs Crozier’s hair. How he puts a cold cloth on his forehead. He scolds him for wanting to drink more than his small allotment of water, and basically acts the doting nursemaid. 

When Crozier tells Jopson to just let him lie in his own filth, that it will teach him a lesson, Jopson gently replies:

Every word he says to Crozier is full of fondness and kindness and respect. He isn’t just cleaning Crozier up and keeping him alive. He’s bolstering his self esteem and ensuring that the other men see his Captain at his best, even when he’s been brought low. 

When Blanky asks if Fitzjames wants to speak to him about Crozier, earlier in the episode, he says “If this is about Crozier, Jopson’s a regular mongoose. Keeps us all out most of the day.”

We can see that Jopson is highly protective of his Captain’s time. He wants him to recover, so he actively shoos men away from Crozier’s door. He isn’t just cleaning and feeding Crozier and combing his hair. He’s actively deterring officers (who outrank him) from entering the Captain’s quarters so that Crozier gets the rest he needs. This man is dedicated. 

During the carnival, when one of the men thoughtlessly spills alcohol onto Crozier, Jopson is there to push the man away. Crozier’s own, personal body guard. We see none of this protectiveness from any of the other stewards. It’s not to say that they aren’t protective of their officers. Only that the camera is always focused on Jopson’s dedication to Crozier in particular. 

While the Captain stands on a platform and addresses the men, Jopson gazes up at him lovingly

Later, in ep 7, when he thinks Crozier doesn’t need him any longer, he’s miserable, and says Crozier should have fetched him to help him dress, and for his trouble sleeping. Again, none of the other stewards are showcased as being this tirelessly dedicated to their officers. It’s a repeated thing in the show. And yes, you could argue that he sees Crozier as a father figure, and most people do, but honestly, I think it’s a bit much. There is something going on here that goes beyond that. 

At the end of Jopson’s life, (which I will NOT be providing screenshots for, because I find it deeply upsetting), he thinks that Crozier has abandoned him. He crawls from his tent, reaching for his Captain and calling for him. He is clearly delusional from pain and lead poisoning, and sees Crozier at the end of a long table, set with sumptuous food, and he crawls along it, swiping dishes of food away with sweeps of his arms in his desperation to reach his Captain. This is a man who hasn’t eaten properly in probably weeks, if not months. He’s starving and mad with pain and he is symbolically pushing away food in an attempt to reach for the man he loves. 

There are more subtle ways to portray a father/son dynamic. And Jopson never once mentions his own relationship with his father. He talks about his mother, and the absence of any mention of his father could mean that he sees Crozier in that light. But then why not just state that? 

Nope. This is the devotion of a man who is deeply in love with his Captain. Crozier’s feelings for Jopson may stop at a fond regard for a man he sees as a son figure, but Jopson’s feelings for Crozier? Off the charts romantic dedication. 

That is all. I’ll go back to writing fic now. 

[mysterytickingegos]

Ouija Board

Pairing: Ghost!Blank x Reader (Ambiguous)

Genre: Paranormal

Word Count: 1,512

Summary: Sequel to Blank’s Winter Ficlet. After months of Blank poking at your sanity out of boredom, you bring your friends home to get their help, and someone brings a Ouija board into the mix. The day ends with you being left with more questions than answers. (There will probably be another part to this later.)

Anonymous Request: 1. Blankgameplays 2. she/her 3. Platonic/ambiguous 4. Fluff (meet cute, like Blanky Boi is 'haunting' {would you call it haunting? is he even a ghost?} reader's house) Prompt: 63 - Reader: “I don’t believe in ghosts.” Blank: *about to ruin this mans whole career* Please and thank you with extra sprinkles on top ♥ ☆ﾟ.*♥･｡ﾟ♥

Authors Note: First off, to get it out of the way, I was originally using a gif from the tumblr search option, and I removed it when asked. Even though I’ve done so, I can’t remove the reply because they blocked me before I even saw the notification. The gif you should be seeing (if it matches the image description) is one I made myself. Now, onto the important stuff- Oh my god, it is about time I got this done! I’m so sorry it took this long for me to get to it! If it helps in any way I finished this fic with idea’s on continuing it later so...you’ll probably be getting more out of your request than most!

Want to Read More?

[Image Description: A gif of Ethan (Crankgameplays) edited to be spooky with multicolored layers. He leans towards the camera and speaks ominously.]

You’d started out with nerves of steel.

Ghosts weren’t real. You knew that.

It’s an old house, and you have an overactive imagination. That’s what you told yourself, over and over again, even once it stopped making sense. But there’s only so many times you can catch things moving on their own, or you could hear that distant voice, before you started to get a little tense. So when you finally hit your limit, you turned to your friends, bringing them to the house in the hopes that they could confirm what you’d been seeing. Or not.

“Okay, before we go in, here’s the plan. We don’t talk about it.” You started, keeping Vi and Eric on the stairs. “Because I think if it knows that I told you about it, it won’t do anything. Like, try to make me look crazy.”

“You do look a little crazy right now.” Violet quipped, nudging you further up the stairs. “Come on, we get it. Act normal, pay attention, let’s get ghost hunting.”

“Ugh, please don’t call it that.” You unlocked the front door, stepping in with your friends following right behind you.

You tossed your keys onto the counter, and the sudden noise was all it took to make Eric yelp. You and Violet both turned to look at him, seeing him cover his face with his hand. “Sorry...”

You sighed, already close to giving up on this plan. You were pretty sure the so-called ghost didn’t even have to do anything. Eric was so nervous and Violet was so excited about this whole thing that they’d probably make up their own ghost story by the time you finished painting the office.

But you trudged forward, bringing them upstairs and getting to work.

You dug your speaker out of the closet, putting some decent music on and leaving it in the corner of the room. Eric pried the paint can open and Violet started lining the room with painting tape. For the first time in a long time, you were all stuck in an uncomfortable silence. waiting for something to happen.

But the day went off without a hitch. It was late in the evening when you finished painting the walls and your friends got ready to leave. “You know, if this was your way of trying to get free labor out of us, fair play to you.” Vi joked, slinging her bag over her shoulders at the door. “But honestly, I’m kind of bummed.”

You shook your head. “I swear I wasn’t, guys. I’m sorry. God, I feel like I’m losing my mind.”

Eric came up behind you, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. “Hey it’s alright, you can- well I mean if you want you can stay with us for-”

Before he could finish, he was interrupted by a small thud and a clattering sound coming from the room right above you, the office. All three of you looked up at the ceiling, then at each other, before making a quick pace back upstairs. You flicked the light back on to see that the half-empty bucket of paint you’d left was now on it’s side, and the color of the floor now matched the walls.

“...Dude, this thing is an asshole.” Vi said bluntly, earning a quiet plea from Eric not to make it mad.

“I knew it! I told you! There’s no way this shit just happens, right?” Despite the fact your floor was ruined, you couldn’t help but get excited. “I mean it’s ridiculous but this happens all the time.”

“Okay, this is going to get even cooler, beeecause...” Vi grinned, pulling her bag back around and digging through it until she found what she was looking for, something wrapped in a beige cloth. “Guess what I brought.”

You watched her unwrap what turned out to be a planchette, which had been wrapped in what turned out to be a cloth Ouija board. Eric coughed nervously, taking a small step back towards the stairs, “I actually uh..I can’t stay, I sort of have a-a doctors appointment! Yeah, that. That’s what I have to get to.”

“It’s seven at night.”

“Yeah, um...it’s therapy. You know, they stay open late and...yeah.” And with that Eric excused himself from any further ‘ghost hunting,’ fleeing out the front door. Before you could also object to the idea of talking to the ghost, Vi grabbed your hand and pulled you along to the living room.

“Do you have any candles?” She asked, kneeling down on the floor and spreading out the Ouija board.

“I have a couple scented candles we could light, I guess...” You shrugged and went around collecting them. You started to say something more but stopped to rethink it. This was ridiculous. Lighting candles for a ouijia board? Acknowledging any of this ghost nonsense felt silly enough to you, just a couple months ago stuff like this was all a big joke to you. But what other explanation could there be for everything you had experienced? Maybe you should have done a bit more research, set up a camera or-

“Y/n?” Vi called out from the floor, pulling you out of your thoughts.

Swallowing your pride, you brought the candles and a matchbox over and kneeled across from her. “So since when are you interested in all this, anyway?”

“What, ghosts and stuff?” She stayed quiet for a moment as she helped you set the candles up on either side of the two of you. “I dunno, I guess I’m just starting to notice that maybe...things aren’t as they seem. Kind of like you. But I actually find it fun. So, are you ready to do this?”

You nodded. “I guess so...” Placing your fingers on the planchette, you took a deep breathe before you started. “Hello?”

“Hello? That’s all you’ve got?”

“Shush.”

“I’m just saying, maybe-” “It’s my house that’s haunted so-”

HELLO

You both fell silent again, glancing up at each other. She looked like she might explode from excitement and you had to fight the urge to roll your eyes. Then, you kept going. “My name is Y/n, this is my friend Violet.”

I  K N O W

“What’s your name?”

The planchette began to move again, but this time rather than settle on any letters or even move towards ‘No,’ it moved to a blank patch of the cloth.

Furrowing your eyebrows, you waited for any movement, but it didn’t come. “Do you have a name?”

D O  N O T  R E M E M B E R

‘Oh.’ You felt a pang in your heart at that.

Vi pouted a little, her head tilting to the side. She was the next to ask something. “What are you?”

G H O S T

“Alright-”

M A Y B E

“...Maybe?”

D O  N O T  R E M E M B E R

Chills ran down your spine. That was not a comforting thought. “Is there anything else in the house with us?”

NO

“You’ve really been scaring my friend, you know.” Vi said, looking cautiously around the room as she spoke.

I  K N O W

It took everything you had to keep your shaking hands on the planchette. “Do you want me to leave?”

Nothing happened. You waited, your heart pounding out of your chest. The sun had officially set, making the house pitch black aside from your little pocket of candlelight. You could almost make out a shadow over the board, it’s source seemingly coming from behind you. You didn’t dare mention it. “Do you want to be alone here again? Because I’d understand that.”

Even more dead silence.

Violet let out a sharp sigh, taking one hand off the planchette, despite your objection, to rub her temple. “Are you still there?”

YES

“I just want to understand why you’re doing this.” You said, much quieter than you meant.

S O R R Y

“You’re sorry?”

S T A Y

“But...what?”

You and Violet sat there for another thirty minutes, asking questions and waiting for answers that never came. The spirit was apparently done talking. “Alright, well...” Violet stood up, putting her bag back on.

“What? Wait, I don’t get any of this. What do I do?” You began to panic, not entirely sure if you should be leaving the board yet.

“You can have the board, keep trying tomorrow, I don’t know. Look-” Her tone was coming off uncharacteristically harsh now, as she avoided your eyes. “My head is splitting, think it’s all the candle fumes. I’m gonna breeze off, good luck though.”

You squinted at the door when it hit you what she said. "Breeze off?” Shaking it off, you turned your attention back to your unusual roommate. “Okay, I’m going to call it a night I guess. I have paint to clean up so,” You moved the planchette to ‘Goodbye,’ taking your hands off and being seconds away from blowing out the candles when it moved all on it’s own.

G O O D N I G H T

[funkymeihem-fiction]

Operation: Miracle Prawn - Part 5

(The final chapter in the Miracle Prawn meihem series! Thank you all for reading!)

“Are you sure we have everything?” Mei pushed her glasses back up her nose, brows knitted fretfully as she began clicking rapidly at her tablet once more. “Powders, lotions, meds…What about diapers? What if she gets sick and you run out of diapers? I’ll order more diapers. And formula? Once the stuff in the refrigerator is gone, what if she doesn’t take to the formula? Or maybe she doesn’t like that brand? What if she gets hungry and she won’t eat and I’m not here? She’s not old enough, I’m not supposed to leave her alone yet! Should I cancel? Here, I’ll call Winston. I’m canceling—”

Junkrat shot her an irritable look. “She won’t be alone. Fuck’s sake, darl, you got any confidence in me at all?”

“No! I mean, yes! I mean, I didn’t mean it like that! But it’s just such a long time and she’s just getting over her first cold, and why does it have to be now?” She reached up to where the baby’s tufted blond head lay slumped against her father’s chest, asleep and blissfully ignorant to her mother’s ongoing tempest. “Can’t they find someone else for this stupid summit? I should be here…”

Junkrat had replaced his usual bomb-holding harness with a baby-holding type instead. It was a lot bulkier than what he was used to, more used to the weight of a RIP-Tire on his back than an infant on his chest, and instead of loose wires or jagged metal scraping against his ribs he had to worry about curious little hands or the occasional foot to the gut. Also the prawn tended to explode even more randomly than his old bombs and it usually smelled a lot worse. But for now she was snoring and breathing very gently against his collar bone, where she’d apparently inherited her mother’s ability to sleep through anything short of a nuclear blast, as Junkrat had to pry Mei’s hands off her as gently as he could.

“S’only a week and you’re a bloody guest of honor and whatnot. The suits are gonna be expecting you to talk about the climate-whatevers. Come on now, you’ve been just as cramped as I’ve been for the past few months. You think I can’t handle my girl on my own for a few days? She and I are gonna have a blast!”

“That’s what I’m worried about!” Mei protested again. “No blasts while I’m gone.”

“You’re no fun at all. Your mum’s no fun, is she? Here I was, planning on showing her how to build a bomb-wheelie, throw ourselves a baby kegger, have a few beers, rob a few banks… Oh come on! Don’t give me that look, you’re doing the look again! Listen, you can call every single day or send Nan to check up on things if that’ll calm you down. Everything’s gonna be fine. I keep telling you I can do this. I’m her da, after all. You go take care of things there, and I’ll take care of things here, yeah?”

“Ana will want to check in on Thursday. And I said I’d only call once, halfway through the conference. I promised. Are you sure you’ll be okay, though? I-it’s not that I don’t think you can do it. It’s just…I won’t be here for her. This conference is all the way in America. I’ll be so far away from you both, and I’ve never been away this long. What if something happens, and I can’t…? I can’t lose anyone else…I can’t lose her…She’s got to be okay. You both have to be okay.”

Junkrat’s scowl softened, snatching up her hand and placing it to his jaw. “Lookit me. D’you honestly think I’d let anything happen to my own prawn? This one, snoring away right here without a care in the world? You’ll be back before you know it and she’ll be none the wiser. And blimey, it’s not like I don’t have the whole damn population of Overwatch on the other side of the door. Nan’s going to be buzzing around, Angelface is back in two days, and Roadie’s…” His expression went dark again. “Well, guess we’re not counting Roadie anymore.”

Her palm cradled his cheek, soft and cool as he leaned down into it. “I know it bothers you,” she said. “But you just have to give him time. I keep saying he must have his own reasons? We can’t press him.”

“You know the only time he saw her? You know the only damn time he’s bothered to show up, is when you were popping her out. And after that he fucked right off! Surprised he’s still even around at all. Just goes to show, doesn’t it? I try to employ the man, give him a better life and new opportunities and whatnot, and this is how he repays me! S’only through the kindness of my tender heart that I haven’t fired him already! It’s pink slips all the way down, that’s what it should be!”

Mei sighed, eyes rolling upward briefly. “Okay, now we are both acting a little irrational. Just, please be careful while I’m gone, okay? Call anyone if you need to, even if you don’t think you need to. If you need help, it’s okay to need help.” Her tablet beeped and she tapped it again, tucking it away and patting herself down. “Oh no, my flight’s here! That’s so soon! Just…be good, both of you. Promise?”

“Yeah, promise and all. C’mere.” He turned awkwardly to the side, opening one arm and leaning down to plant his lips to hers…and then needing to practically pry her off the baby again, when Mei’s kisses were making her make little noises and threatening to wake her up. “We’re both gonna be fine, you’ll see! You go do the thing, and these days are gonna fly right by. We’ll see you in a week.”

“Are you sure?”

“Mei!”

“N-no, no, I’m sorry! Sorry. I’ll see you in a week. Take care of things while I’m gone. Bye bye, zài jiàn!” She hefted her suitcases and hurried off down the ramp towards the base’s docking area. She paused at the bottom, offering a wave. For a moment Junkrat was afraid that she was going to turn around and try to come back again for the third time, but after a dangerously long moment of hesitation she finally grabbed her luggage and bustled out of sight.

Junkrat exhaled after making sure she was actually gone this time, twisting his neck to look down at the slumbering package still strapped onto him. “Bloody hell, you’d think it was a year away. Guess she’s just fretful over you still, d’you think? Well we’re going to show her that everything’s all shine, just the two of us. We can handle it, ay?” He tweaked at her bootied foot and felt it flop limply. “Huh. Unless you’re just asleep for the whole thing, I guess. Come on, let’s get you down in bed proper. And then just think, a whole week with your da! Aren’t you the luckiest prawn in the world!”

***

The prawn had taken her nap like a champion, not waking up no matter how hard he hammered and banged in the next room, disassembling a broken cleaner bot that he’d found in the garbage. Even if Overwatch offered him new parts and all the latest up-to-date technology, he still felt at his best when he was elbows-deep in oil and scrap. And afterward he’d even remembered to wash his hands just how Mei wanted. Or at least enough that it wouldn’t leave black fingerprints on the little animal blankies, which was good enough.

But eventually she’d had her fill of naptime and decided to announce her awakening with a racket as usual. No doubt she was hungry, since her main states thus far had been sleeping, shitting, or eating. Junkrat was a good and responsible father who followed the instructions he’d been taught repeatedly, heating up the milk to just the correct temperature and holding her just how she liked before nudging the bottle’s nipple at her squawling mouth.

Usually she was a ravenous little thing with an appetite to match his errant bodyguard, always eager for tits just like he was. But on their very first damn night alone, of course she decided to be a real wombat about the whole thing. No matter how he tried, she refused to take it. It wasn’t the first time she’d gotten fussy about dinnertime, but her mum had always been around to provide her with the source she preferred. But Mei wasn’t here this time. And no matter how he tried to explain it to her, she just wasn’t getting the picture.

He tried again, easing it at her mouth and cursing aloud when she turned away. “Noooo no no, c’mon now. Your mum’s off doing big science-type things. Now I might not have precisely the tits you like, but this is gonna have to do. Now just oooopen up and— Fuck! I mean, not fuck! Not fuck!” He grabbed a nearby rag and wiped at her face as milk slid down her cheek, which only made her cry more. “Okay, you’re making this harder than it’s gotta be. Work with me here.”

Eventually she did work with him, seemingly deciding at complete random to turn her head and latch onto the bottle like nothing had been wrong at all. What the hell? Normally he enjoyed the work of a fellow agent of chaos, but not when those chaotic whims were aimed at him. It had taken over a half hour just for one feeding, with her fussing and wailing the whole time. But he calmed his jittering and held her steady while she eagerly drained the bottle. Finally.

At least she belched easily enough, when he held her on his bony shoulder and patted the air out of her. She smiled when he pulled her back down, and he liked to imagine that it was a real smile aimed at him, even though he knew better and that she mostly smiled when she was farting, which was…yep, that was exactly what she was doing. He sniffed, then coughed and held her out at arms’ length. “Aawugh! Right outta both ends on that one! That’s definitely from your mum’s side. Now secret between you and me, lovey, your mum’s got some rank ones, real bonzers. Think it’s from all the vegetarian slop she insists on eating. That adorable sweetie pie exterior she’s got, it’s all just cloak and dagger to hide it when she rips gas, so you don’t suspect the source. I’m onto her, though, you’ll see.”

“Nnhg!” the prawn protested, starting to fuss again before he popped a rubber dummy into her mouth. She calmed somewhat, so focused on the pacifier that she didn’t seem to notice that she was socking herself in the cheek. Attagirl. He waved away the smell and carried her off back towards her chair, strapping her in and adjusting her blanket so she’d be comfy while she sucked the dummy and watched the proceedings.

“Your mum also seems to think I can’t do this. Imagine,” he said, diving back into the guts of the cleaner bot with both hands. “I know I ain’t—  I know I can’t always remember things exactly. But still! Bit shit, really, thinking I can’t look after you. You’re just as much mine as hers! Half junker, after all. Of course I can handle you.”

She punched herself in the face again and crossed her eyes.

“Exactly! Memorized everything, wrote it all down, put reminders up, even agreed to let Nan come check in halfway through. It’s all a bit thick for my liking, but what else can I do? Can’t get mad at Mei for it. Just worries for ya, all the time. Worries for me too. Says she can’t lose us no matter what. I dunno, makes my ribs hurt when she says it.” He reached in and tore out a connecting rod, beginning the delicate process of dismantling its smaller bits. “D’you think that’s weird, how something can physically ache like that? Is that what heartbreak feels like? Or is it maybe just the nerve pains again?”

She snuffled and made a wet noise that sounded almost Hog-like.

“Good point. Guess we just gotta prove we can both do this no problem, ay? I’m not gonna forget anything and you’re probably just going to sleep for most of the week anyway. You just gotta eat, shit, and maybe grow a few kilos. Maybe take it easy on the shitting part, though? Not to offend, love, but between the gas and the nappies, you’re basically a biological weapon in a onesie. But no worries! Me and you, right? Who’s gonna be my good girl while mum’s away!”

She coughed and the dummy clattered onto the ground with the sound of hollow plastic. Without even looking, he paused where he was screwing the panels apart on the cleaner bot to sweep it up, wiping it down before he distractedly replaced it in her tiny mouth. He went to sort through the big screws again, when he suddenly sat up very straight and his yellow eyes widened.

“Wait, I—”

“Mmmmnn!” The prawn uttered a whimper behind him, and something was wrong.

Rat whirled around from where he had started to prod the rubber dummy at the opening of the bot’s panels, still holding it in his hand. A large metal bolt screw was resting on his little girl’s bib, where it had just rolled down her chin. He’d been holding the wrong fucking thing. He’d just stuffed a fucking bolt screw into his daughter’s mouth. Thank fuck she’d had more sense than him and had spat it back out.

“SHIT! Fuckshitno! No no no no!” He threw everything aside, metal clattering in all directions, snatching up and hurling the offending screw across the room like a grenade. The prawn’s eyes widened at the noise and she promptly started wailing again, a smear of black on her smiling yellow duckie bib. He wiped at it desperately, fumbling to unstrap her from her chair as he ran her to the kitchen sink, scooping up water to try and clean her chin. “No no no! It’s fine! I got you, you’re fine, it’s all fine!”

She began screaming harder at the sensation of icy water, and his metal hand all but tore the handles of the sink off as he tried to warm it, trying to stick his flesh hand under the faucet since it was the only one able to feel temperature, but then the water went from too cold to too damn boiling hot for prawns. He yanked her back away from the sink, holding her up to the light and inspecting her open mouth for grease while she wailed right into his face.

Small emergency, but she looked clean. And at least she hadn’t swallowed the fucking thing… Mei would’ve had his head on a goddamn platter, and that was only if he didn’t do it himself for hurting his own little girl. That had been too fucking close. But hardly unusual for someone like him, a colossal fuck-up of a junker who should never have had a kid in the first place. No wonder Mei didn’t believe in him being able to—

He shook his head clear, nerves rattled even as he tried to paste his grin back on. Pulling her up against his chest, he rocked and patted her and crooned her little nonsense songs, her cries going muffled as she scowled and flailed a tiny little clenched fist at him. What a scrapper. He probably deserved those tiny punches.

“Shhh shhh shhh, was just one little mistake! Everyone makes mistakes! It was just…one teeny one, right? And you’re a canny one, you knew better. Smarter than your da, aren’t you?” He patted at her fluffy yellow head, trying to rock her. “We’re not gonna tell Mei about this. I’ll be more careful, swear it. Just gotta get me head on straight, sort through me thoughts. Won’t happen again. Come on, there’s a good girl, she’ll be apples, ssshh shhh!”

She seemed less than convinced, and the rocking only seemed to upset her more. Her sobbing continued, only getting louder in pitch and ferocity. Somewhere in the other room, a timer chimed and began playing a happy tune, indicating it was time to try and feed her yet again. He limped for the fridge, and the prawn stopped crying and abruptly smiled up at him. It was an evil smile, just like his but without any teeth. An extremely foul smell began to emanate from her diaper, even worse than before. This time it smelled…solid.

With that business done, she promptly started crying again.

Junkrat started to have his doubts.

***

Roadhog sat slumped in the depths of his sofa, surrounded by cushions and pachimari toys scattered around him. Licking one broad thumb, he separated the paper pages of his book. It was going a little dog-eared, but that’s how he preferred them. Mei had tried giving him one of the computer books, which she said could hold thousands upon thousands of books at one time, or even read them to him if he liked. But he had always declined. He was usually forced to listen to Junkrat talk for hours at a time and found the silence an escape. And he liked old books— real books. He liked the smell and the feel of the paper. He liked the tactile nature of them and their visual presence. And he especially liked their covers: usually with swooning figures falling all over each other, set in exotic places.

This cover was a good one, too. There was a model-looking woman with curly brown hair and dressed in a brocade dress of some old more-romantic time period, her hands raised to her face in mock-alarm at the appearance of her lover in the window of her castle, his face cast into shadow. Judging by the blurb, Roadhog had already surmised that the secret lover was probably a vampire or some such. Vikings, bodices, and time travel were possibly involved too, he wasn’t sure yet.

He’d been doing a lot of reading, lately. With Junkrat now indisposed with Mei and their girl, most of Overwatch had seemed to forget his presence. There had been an occasional mission where he’d been tasked with extra muscle, but he was still ‘the bodyguard’ in their minds. Only now he had no body to guard. Junkrat was technically safe, or at least as safe as someone like him could get. Mei was safe. And their little girl… Everybody was safe. Without him, even safer.

He stayed away from family affairs. They weren’t meant for him. Simple as.

It was getting late in the afternoon, sunlight streaming in through the high window of his garage. It fell across him and warmed his old bones, bathing him in yellow light that was nothing at all like the scorching UV rays of the Outback, but just a pleasant glow for him to read his romance novels to. The dehumidifier rumbled and churned in its comforting mechanical way, drying the air to how he preferred it. The smell of drier sheets still emanated from the basket of fresh laundry that the cleaning crew had left that morning. Everything was pleasant…almost too pleasant.

The distant and muffled wail of a child cut through his drowsy contentment like a hot knife through skin and fat. The sound of a baby’s cry soon drowned out everything else in his mind, hardwired into primal instinct like nothing else. It agitated him on a level he could not describe, and it was getting closer. Closer and closer, and louder and louder, until it was right outside his abode.

Fuck. No.

He pulled on the comforting confines of his swine mask, inhaling a rasping breath of calming hogdrogen from one of the canisters nearby, and he listened in silence. The crying stopped its journey in front of his door and set up shop on the stoop, and he heard a faint rustle and curse before a series of rapidfire poundings rattled the door like gunfire. It was high up, metal against metal, and without any rythym or pattern. That was Junkrat then. That was Junkrat and his baby girl, trying to hail him. The baby, especially, was trying to hail him, with the racket she was putting up that could even drown out her own father. They were here and they bayed for blood and answers outside his door.

“Hog! Haaaaawg! I know you’re in there, Pigface!”

Roadhog remained silent and still and did not respond, waiting for them to leave again.

The pounding and crying continued. “Hog! Roadhog! Get out here! Fine, if that’s how it’s gonna be, we’re… No, no, I’m not yelling at you. Da’s just going to take care of a few things here.” The junker’s shrill voice went low again, or at least as low as Junkrat was capable.

Roadhog waited, even though he knew it was fruitless. And sure enough, there was soon a bang and a puff of smoke from his door’s control panels, as it blew the module from the mechanical interior. It slid open a moment later, and an extremely irate-looking Rat was squatting a distance away from the explosion, holding both hands over the ears of the little girl squirming in the carrier strapped to his front.

He straightened, and even at a glance at a distance, Hog could tell that he was more out of sorts than usual. He was twitching maniacally, his grin was of the stressed gritted sort, his eyes were rimmed in red veins and dark shadows, and every movement was weighted down with the poisonous mixture of exhaustion and caffeine that was uniquely his own. He threw himself forward, hauling a duffel bag along with him that was overflowing with diapers, rags, and bottles instead of bombs and mines. With a snarl, he came limping into the garage home, looking so indignant that it made even Hog almost forget that Rat was the one doing the trespassing.

“Not even gonna answer the bloody door for me!” he said. “As if I couldn’t knock it down in ten secs flat! Would’ve saved me a lot of bother, and now you’ve gone and upset the prawn even more! No no no, da’s not mad at you, darl. Shhh shh shh. Shhh! F-fuck’s sake!”

Roadhog grumbled and set his book down. The peace of the afternoon was now shattered with a baby crying and her father yelling. The smell of soot, ash, and baby powder was noticeable through his filtered mask, replacing the new laundry smell. Even his sunbeam retreated as a cloud passed overhead and blotted out the light, as if to shield itself from the scene down below.

“Hmmn.”

“Don’t you ‘Hrmmm’ at me, mate! Some standover man you’ve turned out to be! Went and scarpered first chance you got, that’s what you did. What’s all that? Left me and Mei and the tot to our lonesomes, barely surviving!”

The little girl hiccuped and waved her limbs weakly from her carrier, still crying.

Hog eyed them both. “Hmm.”

“It’s shit, that’s what it is! That’s what you are! 50% of my hard-earned living expenses, going for what? You’re s’posed to help me! What is it you want, mate?! Is it money? How much do I gotta pay? How much do you want? Uh, pay by the hourly? How much is that? How about your packimacki toy things! What if I got you some of those! Credits? Omnic botcoin investment? What is it you want to be mates again?!”

“Hnnh…It’s not—”

“It’s not enough?! You think now’s the time to drive a hard bargain?!” Rat dropped the bulging diaper bag onto Hog’s coffee table, on top of the papers and books and everything else, leaning down to rifle through it. Toys and pacifiers and a stray bottle came spilling out, rolling across the cement floors. “Here, help me find the thing. I’ll get you a payment right now.”

“…Hrrngh. No. Listen—”

“Just one hour! Just…just one fucking hour!” Rat pulled out one of Mei’s tablets, and Hog saw how his hands were shaking and how much trouble he seemed to be having just navigating through the intro panels, pausing only to swipe a gloved hand across his baby girl’s face when she drooled onto the display.

Hog watched him try at it for a few moments before he finally rumbled his question. “Rat.”

“Yeah?!”

“When did you sleep last.”

“Huh?”

“Sleep.”

“Uh. How long’s Mei been gone? What day is it? Uh…three? Yeah, probably about three days ago.”

“Hmm.”

Rat turned on him, nearly frothing with rage again. “Which is fine! Who really needs sleep, when I’ve got to keep things going so great with my girl! Don’t give me those disapproving piggy eyes behind that mask, I’m wise to you! Three days is fine! …Or has it been four? What’s today? Shit, is this when Nan’s checking in?!” He spun in a lost circle. “You got to tell Nan I got this under control. I…I might’ve made a few mistakes here and there, with the prawn. But look at her, Hog! She’s still in one piece! The miracle prawn that you don’t give one toss about! But she’s doing great and she’s right here if you just look at her! See? SEE?!”

“…Yeah.”

“Just give me one hour, that’s all. If you’re still my mate at all, you gotta help me with this. Help me bathe her and whatnot, get that bow onto her head, you know, all picture-worthy to send to Mei. Then I gotta clean things up in the room. Had a little incident with the blender. So I took apart the pump for Mei’s tits, using the parts but only temporarily. Cut my fingers up pretty bad, but cleaned it all up and bandaged it good. Then the prawn sort of exploded on the changin’ table, got to bleach that. Not the clothes bleach, but the one in the white bottle: one’s for clothes and one’s for shit, one’s going to burn her if I wash the onesies in it and gets on her skin, and what if I hurt her?! What if I keep fucking it up and she gets hurt?! Does she look thin to you? I can barely get her to eat like she’s supposed to, just refuses it outright. Takes ages just for me to get her to eat even a little. What if we put on the fluffy outfit to hide how thin she’s getting? Here, help me get her squared away before Nan calls in her report—”

“Rat. Tell Ana you need help—”

“Fuck! No! Are you out of your gourd?! She’ll tell Mei, she’ll tell Mei everything that I’ve done wrong, that I’m a shit dad who never should have been a dad. And Mei can’t think that, not after everything!” He paced from one end of the room to the other, peg leg clacking, offering another rubber dummy to his still-wailing baby and helplessly tossing it aside when she refused it yet again. “D’you know how long I spent convincing Mei that I could do this? That she could leave me with the prawn without me fucking it up? She…She’s got to know I can do this. She’s got to at least think I can do this. E-even if I can’t…do this…” He slumped down onto the overstuffed armchair, lanky body practically melting under the ever-growing weight still strapped onto his front, latching both hands over his bloodshot eyes. “Hog…What if I can’t do this?”

Roadhog was silent for a very long time, breath rasping through his filters, audible over the hiccuping and burbling of his impromptu guests. Behind the mask’s lenses, his eyes swerved downward to the little bundle in her carrier. He’d seen glimpses of it from far away, usually attached to Mei, but even when she caught his gaze, she never approached him with it. Even if he hadn’t told her all of it, he had a feeling that Mei knew why he hadn’t visited them. Not visited her…

This was the first time he’d seen her up close since the day of her birth. She’d been fresh as a newly-laid egg when he’d seen her, barely cleaned and still green around the gills when Junkrat had shown her off from behind the glass. She’d grown a little since then, the ‘prawn’, and was no longer the shrunken and misshapen thing from before. She had more wisps of yellow, hair, soft and thin as goose down, and eyes to match her father’s. But the cheeks and nose and the stern frown was definitely Mei’s, especially when she finally noticed the big blob that was his presence and she hiccuped and stared up at him in a very accusatory way.

“Bbbwaaaa,” she said.

She didn’t look anything like the one he’d known. That one had been larger, darker-eyed, and with dark hair that had grown in thick right away. That one had been more quiet and more solemn, with a strangely thoughtful gaze for something so small and so new. That one would have had deep thoughts as she observed the world around her, would probably have chronicled it all with the crayons and paper he’d put aside for her for her one day. That one would have sung the song about bumblebees together with him, had already started to try gurgling along with his crooning. That one had only just learned to smile, really smile at his face, and reach for him, and those dark eyes always lit up in recognition with a spark that burned brighter than the white light on the horizon that had scorched her to ashes.

This one was flailing her legs like a kickboxer, snotting and drooling onto her bib, and still trying to focus on the big masked blur that took up her entire vision. He saw the way she squinted, trying to control her eyes and the lids that covered them without knowing how or why. And though she likely couldn’t even see exactly who he was or the danger he presented, she reached out one tiny little hand and flailed blindly in his direction.

“Aaanngh,” she said.

Hog didn’t respond to the gesture, making himself look away as he grunted and leaned down to pick up a rattling toy that had rolled against his boot. Placing it back on the table, he finally went to set aside his novel, placing his bookmark between the pages. “Hm. Can just call Ana. She’ll sort you out. She knows about—”

Junkrat suddenly uttered a snore from where he had collapsed in the armchair, his hands still over his face in exhausted despair. Hog grumbled aloud, eyes rolling skyward behind his lenses. It wasn’t the first time that Rat’s poor sleeping habits had led to narcoleptic tendencies, but this time he couldn’t truly be irritated at him. This wasn’t from too many nights of shitty coffee and crumpled plans, but from desperately trying to attend an apparently-capricious infant on his very first foray being left alone.

It had been many decades ago, but Hog could still remember how fucking terrifying that had been, to be left alone with something so precious but so fucking fragile. There had been no sleep to be had then, either, when the baby had gotten sick while her mother was so far away, and he’d been Mako. Every cough or whimper she made had been like ice in his veins, barely able to grab an hour or two of sleep in as many days. He could remember being so tired that he’d fallen asleep rocking her, with the formula heating up on the stove, and had later awoken to the smell of burning milk in the kitchen and her coughing vomit into his lap.

Rat’s exhaustion was from a different source, but Hog knew what it could do to a man. Could drive someone crazy, or at least crazier than normal. Could you make you desperate to try so hard that you only made it even more difficult than before. Could have you run on fumes until you finally could fall apart and break down in the presence of someone you thought you could trust..even though he’d abandoned you weeks ago…

The little yellow-haired girl, the prawn, remained blissfully unaware of the turmoil. Her father had literally collapsed with her still attached to his chest, but that was hardly something she seemed worried about now. She’d become so distracted by the big blurry Hog sitting a few feet away that she’d forgotten to keep crying, and she reached for him again. He watched her. She was trying so hard to control those unwieldy little things that were her own limbs, impossibly small fingers curling and uncurling, trying to grasp and not understanding why nothing was there.

Hog remained very still, still watching her. Her arm lengthened, pushed out as far as she could get it from the confines of her carry-bag. Her cheerful little cartoon-printed onesie had been washed recently, still had little specks of lint and fuzz attached to the elastic around her wrist. She seemed baffled by the very concept of her own hand, her yellow eyes suddenly going into focus as she flexed her brittle little digits again, watching them move because she had wanted them to move. Undeterred by her lack of coordination, she reached out to try and touch the world around her.

The big blurry thing shifted in the far distance and rose upward, and Roadhog very slowly loomed closer. The lenses of his swine mask remained cold and blank, until they were caught in the sunbeam that dared to peek from behind the cloud cover, glowing white and yellow. His ‘face’, the one he had adopted in the wake of the apocalypse, was lit with terrifying clarity. An enormous hand, adorned with metal spikes and scars and chipped black nails, a hand that had crushed skulls and spattered blood and wrung the life out of so many, lifted up in front of her. One by one, his fingers curled, until there was only one thick and crooked index, held forth in front of her.

She smiled, and her tiny hand found his offered finger and closed upon it, gripping onto him.

It destroyed him more than the nuclear apocalypse ever had. Instead of scorching fire and bleached rock and bone, it was soft flesh and gentle warmth and potential, and everything else that had ever been stolen from out of the godforsaken desert he’d loved. It was all the ashes that had once poured out of the little blanket he’d tried to hold in his arms, when he’d found her in the wreckage and ruin of their home. Far greater than the treasure that Junkrat had dug out of the wastes all those fateful years ago, it was everything he’d tried to forget, and the one thing in existence that he’d truly fled from… And here she was, again. Even if it wasn’t her…

Mako sighed, lowering his head briefly and breathing deep.

He reached his other hand to awkwardly undo the straps that attached her to Rat’s chest. The ripping of velcro barely roused him at all, but when Hog started to lift the weight of the baby off of him, he launched out one skinny arm that immediately grappled onto his former partner-in-crime’s vest, the other covetously grasping his little girl back to him. Red-rimmed eyes shot open, teeth bared, and Rat was immediately in Hog’s face and ready to fight to the death.

“I’LL CRACK YA! YA WOT, MATE? YA WOT?!”

The girl started crying again.

Hog grumbled at the ruckus, but relented his grip and slowly lifted both hands in an extremely rare gesture of peace. “Rat. Wake up.”

There was a pause as Rat blinked strangely, his eyes not quite in sync. He wasn’t even truly awake, his reaction born of years of rough living and parental paranoia. Shuddering, the aggression evaporated from his stance, furrowed brows easing. He looked around them blearily, then placed a hand on the baby’s fluffy head and eased back into the chair again as he realized where he was. ���Oh, s’just you. Were we doin’ something? Uh, what’s the time, I got to feed—”

Hog upnodded to the protesting prawn. “I’ll take her.”

“You?” Rat sneered in indignant disbelief. “You don’t know anything about sprog-rearin’. Dunno why I even came here. Didn’t know where else to go. There was nowhere else to go. I couldn’t… S’just…”

“I know a little. Give her here.”

Junkrat seemed understandably torn, eying his erstwhile partner with a look that Hog knew well, and knew better than to protest. Down beneath all the exhaustion and madness and radiation, all the scattered pieces of calculating genius scraped together in ways that nobody truly understood— least of all Rat himself. The cogs of his mind were clearly grinding, weighing pros and cons and sorting through delusions and realities. There was too much at stake to make the decision lightly.

Hog couldn’t be sure what led him to finally relent, as metal fingers loosened around the velcro straps of the carrier and his grasp uncoiled from around his precious onesie-wrapped bundle. The way he was looking at Hog was still very far from kind, but still he opened his arms and allowed her to be taken from him. Moving cautiously and slowly, Hog lifted the little girl off her father’s chest and deposited her into the crook of his elbow, folding one massive hand over top of her.

“You got her?” Rat fretted.

“I got her.”

“Hrnnghh! Well…! Huh. Actually handlin’ her all right, I guess. Surprised you’d know anything at all about handling babies.”

“…Used to know someone. He had a little girl.”

“Oh yeh? Is it anyone I know?”

“Not really.”

“You should give ‘em a ring, make introductions. Give my lil’ prawn a new playmate and whatnot! Gal pals!”

“Hm. Don’t think so. Not around anymore…And he wasn’t any good for her in the end.”

“Oh. Well then fuck him, I s’pose.”

“…Yeah.”

“Shame, I guess, about the girl. Probably she and my prawn might’ve been best mates!”

Hog looked down to where the baby was gurgling and mouthing at his knuckle. “Yeah. Think they woulda gotten along.”

Rat watched him like a hawk, not looking down even when he leaned to start undoing the wraps and clamps of his prosthetic limbs. There was a faint buzz as the old nerve receptors powered down and went dead, and Rat gingerly went to ease limbs off the stumps of his leg and arm. They looked red and chafed and raw, a far-too-familiar sight from where he’d worn them for too long without a break. He rubbed at what was left of his forearm, brows lowering.

“Going to explain why you bailed on me and mine, then? It’s been yonks since I spied hair or hair of ya. Mei kept on saying you’d come around in your own damn time…but you didn’t. And she kept saying to wait, I just gotta wait. And I thought maybe Mei was right because Mei’s fair dinkum and she’s right a lot, so I waited…and still you never showed. You never fucking did. And at first I was right cross about it all, but then…I started wondering why.”

Hog glanced up at him but said nothing.

Rat’s eerie gaze remained fixated, pupils narrowed to little pricks of black on yellow. “We’ve bashed around for years, mate— years! And we’ve seen some shit together. How many people have I seen you kill? I watched you face down two of the top brass from Junkertown on your land when they came for me, and you didn’t even flinch. Never seen you scared of anything. So I thought it was something I’d done. But wasn’t that either, was it? Fockin’ hell, how many bullets have I had to pluck from the meat of your arse or run to get them gas cans when you couldn’t breathe? And you changed my sheets and even cleaned out the thunderbucket from that time I got dead-real sick in that shack outside of Dooniwop. Not too many blokes would do that. Probably lots of other times I’ve forgotten, too. We’ve been true blue up until now.”

“…Hmm.”

“So what makes someone like you…” He lifted his remaining hand to point at Hog. “Scared of someone like her?” It tilted down to the little bundle in the cartoon onesie.

Hog looked back down to the girl, still quiet. For a long time he simply didn’t answer, unwilling or unable to put it into the right words. He lifted one meaty shoulder in a rather helpless shrug that did not at all suit someone like the one-man apocalypse. “Hmmmh…”

“It’s not me or Mei, is it? It’s my prawn. You’ve been running scared of my prawn for over two months now, and it’s not because of the crying or the nappies or the spitting up or the baby things. It’s somethin’ else about her…It’s somethin’ that’s happened before her…”

Junkrat eyed him again, in the same way as before. Whatever might have been going on in that strange head of his, this time he wasn’t telling. And when the prawn started fussing and whimpering again from Hog’s arm, there wasn’t time to confront the matter further. At least, not for now.

There was simply no time. Rat was already stressed back into action, sliding onto the floor and rummaging through the diaper bag until he came up with a smaller pack, digging a bottle out of it. “Put a pin in that for now, Roadie, we’re in the shit. Still got to get her ready before Nan suspects anything or tells Mei I can’t do this. Fuck, she’s cryin’ again, they can’t hear her cryin’…”

“Give it here. I’ll heat it up.” Hog was glad to be distracted from the conversation and held out his free hand, the bottle plonked into his palm.

“Right, right, right. Okay. Go heat that up, I’ll feed her. Not too hot! Then I’ll get her in a bath, wash her arse, put her up in one of those fancy baby dresses Mei likes. Pose her for some slick photography with her favorite roo stuffie, ya know, for proof of life…” He dug his arm about in the bag, growing more and more frantic. “Wait, where’s her roo? Where the hell is the roo! Mei’s gonna see her without the roo and she’ll know I’ve forgotten it and then she’ll start questioning all the other things I forgot and then she’ll think I’ve somehow faked the pictures, like I got a fake baby that I may or may not have made out of some of her extra clothes and some pillowcases just in case anything happened, not that I’m saying anything happened—!”

“Rat.”

“What!”

“Sit down. Gonna go heat this up. I’ll be back.”

“Will ya be back this time?!”

“Yeah.”

“…Will ya?”

“Yeah. I will.”

Rat made a strange noise, pulling the diaper bag into his lap and continuing his search as he collapsed back onto the sofa. Roadhog sighed and trundled off into the kitchen, filling a pot with water and setting it to warm. He’d done it a thousand times, too many years ago, but still remembered the order. He tested the water, dropped in the bottle, and rocked the little girl that was now bicycle-kicking her legs against his chest and not-quite-laughing.

Hog snorted down at her. “Guess we know which side you got that from,” he said, heading back into the den. “Your girl’s going to be a terror one day—”

Junkrat was asleep again, both arms locked around the bag, his face smushed into a pile of baby clothes and the zipper already pressing indents into his cheek, the missing toy kangaroo wedged into the sofa down by his remaining leg. Roadhog stared down at him for a moment, then placed the kangaroo by his pillow and meandered off again, shutting the door behind him. He waited for the milk to heat, watching the timer and only becoming distracted when he noticed a very small hand reaching up for him again.

The prawn was focused on his face, or what had become his face. Adjusting her up along his arm, he allowed chubby little fingers to clumsily grasp at the rim of the mask’s filter, though he felt nothing from their touch. He rasped in a breath, which seemed to startle her for the first time, and he saw how her eyes widened and she looked suddenly offended.

“Don’t think much of that?” he asked.

“Mmmmnn!” she said, still flailing.

He reached up and very gently took hold of her hand, lowering it away. “Hmm. Guess not. Don’t think she would’ve liked it much either. Didn’t like loud noises. Got scared easier than you do…”

He leaned his head down, undoing the buckles and straps that held the mask onto his head. Its filters hissed as it depressurized and the burn of real air returned with the smell of milk and talcum powder, the scratches and fogged glass of the lenses giving way to almost-clearer vision, looking down at her. Again her eyes tried to focus as she peered back, squinting and furrowing, unfamiliar with the leathery swine-monster above her becoming someone entirely different.

When she reached for him again, he didn’t stop her. Unwieldy little fingers touched the white bristles around his chin, the deep scars and the burns, and the chapped flesh of what was left of his lower lip. This one was still so young, even younger than she had been. He could still remember every moment of it; when she had first learned how to work her hands, how to look between faces, how to smile and laugh, and how to bring her hands together and squeal happily when she heard him singing her favorite songs…like the one about the baby bumblebees…

The timer chimed and he reached to take the milk bottle from the water, wiping it off and testing it on his wrist before transferring her back down into the crook of his elbow. Rat had said that she was being fussy lately, somewhere during his ranting, and Hog wasn’t surprised when she tried to turn her nose up at the offering.

“Hey,” Hog said, the baritone of his voice thrumming deep as she looked up at him again.

He tried to hum, the same tune that his own girl had loved so much— that tune about the baby bumblebees. But he could barely manage a few notes before something old and tired and long-buried lurched in the darkness of his chest and he swallowed the song back down until it hurt, like those bumblebees were stinging him in the throat. He cleared them away with a rumbling cough, briefly placing a hand over his mouth. It had been too many years since he’d sung it, or not enough.

“…Maybe a different one,” he told her. “Know one about the kookaburra.”

Maybe it was the thunder of his voice or the tune about the kookaburra itself, but she seemed entranced when he began to hum. When he offered the bottle again, she stilled her fussing and took it with no more trouble, yellow eyes drifting shut. The bottle steadily drained until she belched against the cloth on his shoulder and yawned with a high squeaking noise like a snared rabbit. He replaced her in the crook of his elbow, and she opened her eyes long enough to smile up at him. Hog almost smiled back.

But then her smile turned into toothless grin, and she promptly passed gas at him before immediately falling asleep, just as abruptly as her father had in the next room over.

He stifled a chuckle, leaning his face away. “Eugh…Yeah, that’s from Mei all right. Might need the mask after all.” He tossed the empty bottle aside and stood, heading back into the den for his armchair and his book, and to keep watch while they rested.

***

Mei trotted up the ramp with her suitcase, and spotted the extremely unmistakable beanpole frame of Junkrat waiting for her. She brightened and waved, hurrying her step with the hovers on her case struggling to rattle after her. “Jamie, zhè biān! Over here!”

One extremely frazzled-looking junker turned at the sound of her voice, his customary grin only able to make it halfway across his face as he opened both long arms. She enthusiastically threw herself into them, and his grip coiled and tightened as he buried his nose into her hair, sighing aloud before he began to plaster her face with irritating kisses while she squealed and batted him away just how he liked. Only then did he rear back up to his full height, keeping one arm draped over her shoulder. “How are ya, darl?”

“It’s good to be back. That was such a long week! Um, n-not that I was worried or anything, I know you said things were fine. I got the little video you and Ana sent of her with her little zebra sweater, so cute! And she took the bottles okay? Was she—”

“Aaah-haha-ha! Nope! Everything was fiiiiine! It’s just…ya know. Prawn’s a vivacious girl and it was…uh. Ya know, she’s kinda got a stubborn streak and I— Uh, maybe you could just not leave again? Ever? Just a joke! But really!” He rubbed nervously at his neck, then blinked when there was a pull at his arm, leaning down to where Mei could plant another kiss on his cheek. Some of the tiredness melted away, his shaky smile steadying. “Ah, heh!”

“I know it must have been hard. It was hard with two of us. I hope you weren’t being too hard on yourself? Like I said, you can always ask for help when you get tired. I know I ended up crying in the bathroom more than once because I was so tired.”

“Mighta been a little more difficult than I’d been crowing. Only a little, though!”

“But…it’s easier with help? I heard you had help?” She lowered her voice scandalously as they walked, looking around as if expecting someone to interrupt them at any moment. “Really? I guess I’m a little surprised that it was Mr. Roadhog. Is everything okay between you two? Was everything okay with her?”

“Honestly, love, I got no idear how it went. Apparently I passed out on his lounger for about six hours straight before he woke me up so I could go get more bottles for her. Was acting all weird about her at first, all…squirrely-like. But when I wake up, she’s fed, burped, changed, and absolutely smitten with the big lug. Ya know, you’d almost think ol’ Pigface has got more experience than he’s let on!”

“W-well, it’s not really our place to… But he was okay with her, is the main thing? She didn’t bother him? And you were able to sleep? It sounds like you might have needed a little break.”

Junkrat turned upon her, wild-eyed. “N-no! No, it was all fine! Didn’t even need to sleep! Who told you that!”

“You did?”

“Well fuck me, then! Yeah nah, I had everything under control! Well, me and maybe a bit of help on the down-low from Uncle Roadie. And the prawn was sheer perfection, not a misstep, absolute angel, definitely didn’t explode a tornado of shit that somehow managed to miss her entire fucking diaper or anything! Speaking of!” He leaned down to snatch up her bag, pushing her in front of him as they rounded the corner. “Think I ain’t the only one what’s happy to see you back.”

Mei’s entire person lit up, even prettier than when his bombs went off. She dropped the handle of her suitcase and broke into a jog, then into a run, right up to the enormous figure of Roadhog, and the cushioned carrier he held in one hand. He upnodded and grunted a little greeting sound, but she only managed a very distracted semi-response before she set upon the carrier with both hands, pulling at straps and plastic buckles until she was finally able to lift the little girl back into her embrace after so long away.

She laughed to herself as she rocked her, covering the little wisps of blond hair with kisses. “Oh no! Nǐ zěn gǎn! You were asleep when I left and you’re asleep when I come back too! Terrible, terrible manners. You could at least say hello.” She pressed another kiss to her forehead, holding her tightly, voice entirely without malice as she scolded her.

The prawn mumbled to herself and stirred but remained asleep through the torrent, sucking on the rubber pacifier, as Mei shook her head and turned up to where Roadhog was peering down at them in his usual silent menace. A quick glance backward saw Junkrat still struggling with the handle to her case, so she took a moment to lean up towards him. “I promised I won’t pry, Mr. Roadhog, honestly I won’t. But I guess I was surprised to see you in those photos with her. I know Jamie won’t admit he was having some trouble with her but… I’m glad he went to find you. I just want to know if you’re okay with her? With everything?”

“Wasn’t in the plan. Was hard. Thought those days were long gone. But Rat needed help. And she’s…” Hog shrugged, rumbling a low sigh before lifting the empty carrier. “She’s all right.”

“Then, thank you. From both of us. Thank you so much.”

There was a loud clatter from behind them. “Ow! Where’s the latch for the hovers! Fuckin’ thing!”

“Oh, here! I’ll get it, sometimes it sticks!” Mei placed one last kiss to the prawn’s head before very carefully placing her back into the carrier, moving to help him where the hover pad had gotten stuck and the entire case now trying to roll around in circles. “No, no, it’s going left, hold it still!”

“Head it off at the pass, darl! It’s goin’ rogue!”

Hog watched them laugh and dissolve into more arguments while their daughter slept through it all, leaning down to strap the little girl back in and cover her snoring body with her blanket again. She might not have been awake for Mei’s reunion, but there would be time later. And Rat was perking up back into his old self again, where he had thrown himself bodily onto Mei’s suitcase and was trying to wrestle the hover port closed again while Mei pulled at his leg and yelled for him ‘not to hurt it’.

They were both looking a little flushed by the time they had straightened it out, and Mei retrieved her suitcase while Rat had firmly wrapped one arm about her once more. When they returned, Hog caught the little glances towards one another, and where Mei was subtly trying to shoo his hand away from her rear. She cleared her throat and adjusted her glasses as her gaze darted to the little sleeper in the carrier, sighing aloud when the prawn only fussed a little at the noise, turned her head the other way, and went right back to sleep.

Hog half-lifted the carrier and made his offer, lifting his head very subtly to Rat. “…She’s asleep. Just ate. Probably going to nap for a while. Could keep her for a bit.” Just as he thought, Mei looked a little disappointed, but he knew she wouldn’t have time to mope for long. He wasn’t entirely sure if Rat had caught his signal or if the younger junker was just being as lecherous as normal, but Rat was quick to seize the opportunity.

“Y’hear that, darl? Prawn’s a champion napper, might be a while. We uh…we got some time? Ya know, I ain’t seen you for a week.” He promptly returned to trying to squeezing at her side and lowered his voice into a hoarse ‘whisper’ that was still audible to everyone around them. “Prawn’s not the only one who’s been looking forward to those tits again…”

“Jamison!” She hissed, before coughing sheepishly and hugging her suitcase like a shield. Likely she would never get used to the junkers’ ‘open’ style of approach. “I-I mean, we shouldn’t inconvenience Mr. Roadhog, and I haven’t seen her—”

“She’ll wake up later on, can get right back on track. But I mean, uh…ya know, if we got time.”

She looked torn. “No, we shouldn’t, we shouldn’t impose…”

Hog snorted and glanced down at her. “Offering. She’s asleep. You got a good sleeper. You got time. Take it.”

Junkrat nosed at her hair, practically salivating. “Oh, she’s gonna take it…”

“JAMISON!” Her face lit up pink. “O-oh! Well I guess…I guess if she’s going to be napping for a while and you don’t mind taking her? Just for a little bit! Um, I guess if…Will you message me the moment she wakes up, though?”

“Yeah. I will.”

Mei offered him a grateful but embarrassed smile, and Junkrat gave him a much more grateful and much less embarrassed smile as well. Mumbling words of both apologies and thanks, she grasped onto Rat’s hand and let him drag her away. Their arms looped around each other in that awkward manner, too tall and too short and determined to make it work despite. Even while Hog watched them go, Rat goosed at her bottom and she slapped his arm, then leaned her head up against him while he laughed uproariously at some joke or other. They turned another corner and were gone, headed back to their home together.

Hog was left alone once more… Or, not alone. Not this time.

The prawn squeaked out another yawn from her carrier and he glanced down at where she shifted in the throes of brand-new dreams. He placed his finger in her open palm, and her fist curled and closed and held on as she stilled once more. He waited until she was pacified, patiently tucking in the blanket again before lifting up her carrier and heading off back to his own home. It was likely she’d be asleep for a while longer yet, and they had time before everything devolved back into chaos.

“Come on,” he told her. “Gonna stay with Uncle Roadhog a while longer.”

Best to enjoy those moments while they could. They were moments you’d never get back, no matter how much he’d give to have them back again. But he had this, at least for now. And it was all right.

It was all right.

[xxjust-tiredxx]

Chapter Two: Preparations

Class 1A's energy was second to none in U.A. Along with a certain One For All user when he was told Eri was allowed to come to the School Festival. He had to make her smile. Overhaul might have been defeated but his shadow still loomed over her. "We gotta decide what song we should do first. Anyone got any ideas?" Toru asked turning to everyone else in Class 1A. "I honestly don't know about stuff like that, so I'll be going along with your ideas." Ojiro said as Kaminari held his tail. "Yeah same here." Shoji said as Kaminari let go so he could speak. "Well it should be a song most know." Everyone began giving idea's while Jiro held her chin in thought. When Mina's idea of 'something everyone can dance do.' she turned to the group. "If I were to put together your ideas, we should be playing a EDM." The class looked at her confused so Midoriya decided to explain "As In a dance clubs with a repetitive beat and scythed backtrack." "Still don't get it." Kaminari and Mina said blanky. "Anyways." Jiro spoke catching everyone's attention. "Has any of you played drums or anything?" She got her answer when nobody replied. "Well we need the backbone of the band, the drums. I'm more of a guitar player so I'm still learning for drums." Midoriya took a glance at Katsuki making him shake his head. They solved some of childhood problems during their fight trying to understand each other first by fists. Then durning house lockdown they manged to hold an actual conversation for once. It took some time but Katsuki finally stopped making death threats or any meaningful threats at Midoriya so he went back to calling him 'Kacchan'. Even if he still wasn't completely over the torment he had faced for years. Katsuki still called him 'Deku' but meant it in respect of his his hero name, and also as his rival. "Well Kacchan has some skill on the drums." "Damnit Deku!" "Wait, you do Baku-bro?" Kirishima questioned being just as surprising as everyone else- excluding Midoriya-at the news. "My old hag made me take music classes as a kid." Katsuki answered. "Yet another surprise from an unexpected person!" Mina exclaimed. Sero grinned motioning to the drums. "Come on Bakugou! Give the drums a try!" "Like hell I would." "I heard It's pretty hard..." His grinned getting wider knowing it would provoke his explosive friend. And yet sure enough, Bakugou grabbed the drums sticks and sat himself down.  They were surprised when he rejected being on the drums. "Bakugou, please!" Jiro pleaded. "If your the one on the drums it's definitely going to turn out good!" "Bullshit!" He yelled catching everyone off guard. "All of this is just for some empty promise. So students can blow off some steam? What steam? What did we do to piss them off? If it's not self-satisfaction, then what the hell is it!? I'm not going to sit they quite from people who that are mad at us!" "Y-you didn't have to say it like that!" Toru puffed but instantly took a step back at Bakugou's glare. "That's exactly the damn problem!"  Iida turn to Yaoyorozu in thought. "Maybe we haven't been considerate enough?" "Doesn't it piss you off?" Bakugou continued. "Did we ask to be attacked by villains. Why should we care about how they feel?" The question shocked them for the third time today. "If your doing this to make them feel better I don't want to have anything to do with it! And neither should you! Let's kill everyone in U.A. with sound!" He finished making a line with his thumb starting from the left side of his neck to his right. "Alright!" Everyone cheered. "Let's do this!!!" ✦✧✦✧✦✧✦ "It's finally decided!" Iida yelled with bags under his eyes. "The band team! Bakugou! Yaoyorozu! Kaminari! Tokoyami! And Jiro! Effects team! Koda! Kirishima! Sero! Todoroki! And Ayoma! Then finally the dance team! Midoriya! Tsu! Sato! Ojiro! Ochako! Mineta! Shoji! Mina! Toru! and I! We're going to be super busy tomorrow!" "Hai!" The class cheered. Midoriya let out a breath of exhaustion sitting down on the couch. "All that planning took a lot out of me." While most of his class went to their rooms to sleep and call it a day, Yaoyorozu once again stayed behind. "You need something Yaoyorozu?" "Well first off, please call me Momo." Midoriya nodded his head and she continued. "And second, you seemed pretty excited for tomorrow. I mean really excited." Midoriya smiled gesturing to the spot beside him. She sat down and comfortably rested her head on the couch. "Aizawa-sensei allowed Eri into the school festival today. And because of Overhaul, she forgot how to smile." He whinched remembering Eri's question. "How do you smile?" "I'm hoping if I give it all I have, she'll be able to smile again. So she'll never have to be afraid of Overhaul again." A smile spread across Yaoyorozu's face. "I hope so too. But remember-" "-Your here too. All of us" Midoriya finished.  "Good to hear..." Then right after that, she fell asleep on his shoulder. He panicked because he had no idea what to do in the situation. Just the fact someone reached out for him felt like a miracle itself. But now the most beautiful woman was fast asleep on his shoulder. Taking a few deep breaths to calm his racing heart, he tried move but instantly failed when Yaoyorozu moved closer wrapping an arm over his waist and moved her face to the crook of his neck. "She probably thinks I'm her pillow!" His theory was confirmed in Yaoyorozu's sleep talking. "Bad pillow...your not allowed...to run from me..." He thought about moving again however it most likely meant being held tighter. Then he thought about waking her but she looked so peaceful in her sleep. She had undone her ponytail so her black hair was pushed behind her ear allowing it to rest on her back. Her dark red nightgown while her breath tickled his neck.  "Alright Midoriya, you got two choices. One, you could leave Yaoyorozu be and risk the chance of failing to fake up before everyone else reaching a huge misunderstanding. Or two, I take Yaoyorozu to her room risking her waking up or being caught by my friend reaching another misunderstanding." After a five minute debate inside his head, he decided it would be best to take her to her room. The couch isn't a good place to sleep and planning took us to 1 am in the morning. In a sift motion he takes Yaoyorozu's legs and placed it on his lap. No response. So he moved on to the next step moving an arm around her waist and stood up successfully carrying her bridal style. She moved her hands up from his stomach and to his back interlocking them. "HOW IS SHE DOING THIS ASLEEP!?"  He questioned becoming more red faced than he already was. His heart felt like Full Cowling 20%, just without the creaking. Slowly and carefully he made his way to Yaoyorozu's room making sure not to run into anyone. The number one person he wanted to avoid was Mina.  "I'll be watching you..." He shivered remembering her words at yesterday's breakfast. Lucky he made it to her room without any problems. Her room was unlocked saving him a whole lot of trouble and entered the room making sure to close and lock it behind him. The last thing he needed was Jiro or Mina to walk in on the scene. Now it was time for the final step, gettin Yaoyorozu inside the bed and never speak of this accident again. Midoriya set her down on her bed and was about to make his get away when he was suddenly pulled onto the bed. Now he had a new problem. He had to somehow slip out of Yaoyorozu's rather tight grasp and get out from under the covers so he could leave to room. But it was impossible now. Any wrong movement could mean the awaken her along with the fact the bed could creek at any time. "Okay new plan..." Midoriya whispered to himself feeling his eyelids get heavy. "...wake up before Yaoyorozu...and....and...fall right to sleep in this comfortable bed..." He finished already being half asleep until he was completely unconscious. Midoriya's Pov... I groaned feeling rays of light make contact with my closed my eye lids. I tired moving my left arm but it was...stuck? I tired moving again but heard a groan...It wasn't from me. I immediately open my eyes seeing an asleep Momo. "Yup. I'm gonna die." That's when Momo began to shift around pulling herself closer an tightening her grip. I didn't dare move from my place, but she was definitely going to make up soon. I nodded my head seeing her eyes flutter open. "I lived a decent life." "Izuku..? What are you doing in my bed...?" My face alone couldn't express the joy my heart felt when my name escaped her lips. However remembering the situation I was in left no time to think straight. "I-I can explain-" "It's fine." Momo said plainly rubbing her eyes and untangling her legs and arms from mine. "Just wondering." I stared at her in shock. "A-are you still half asleep?" "No, I perfectly aware of what happened." "So...your not going to kill me?" Momo laughed before getting serious. "If you have a good reason to explain yourself. It would be ashamed to have a student go missing." I shivered and wasted no time telling her the events of last night. Her face got red and she quickly began apologizing. "Gomenasai. G-" I cut her off before she could apologize again. "It's fine Momo. It's understandable why you would act that way." "Still...I know your not that type of guy so I should have trusted you more. You even told me your secret." "Like I said before it's understandable." She finally stopped apologizing so I decided to change the topic. "So...did I bother you while asleep?" Her face flushed red and she pushed back a strain behind her ear. "Actually...I think it was one of the best nights of sleep I had in my life." "Yeah...me too." I sheepishly agreed getting up from the bed. "I should head back to my room now." "R-right." Momo nodded and I escaped through the window with 'Full Cowling' before anything became too awkward and embarrassing.  Luckily I made it to my room without any trouble and anyone else spotting me. I changed into a plain green shirt and black shorts walking into the living room to be greeted by my classmates. "Ohaiyou."  "Ohaiyou Midoriya!" They called back. "You all ready for today's preparations?" "Hai! ( Yes! )" They answered in unison. "Young Midoriya!" My eyes widen at the voice calling my name from outside. I haven't heard from him since the death of Nighteye. I rushed to the front door and opened it to a smiling Toshinori Yagi. "All Might?" The name brought the attention of the class towards the front door including Yaoyorozu who had just entered the room. "Ohaiyou students! I heard your class was doing a dance? I can't wait to see it!" The class cheered in response before turning his attention back to me. "Did you need something All Might?" He waved his hand. "Please call me Yagi. I'm retired." I looked at the ground with downcasted eyes remembering the fight with All For One. But a hand landed on my shoulder so I looked at Yagi smiling. "Don't be sad young Midoriya. After all, a young hero will soon become a bright flame." My downcasted eyes turned to determination as I nodded my head. "Right." So I followed Yagi outside and into a far forest unaware of a certain Bi colored teen glancing at the scene. "Dad might strikes again..." After a while of walking, Yagi finally stopped and turn towards me. "Use Full Cowling at 20%." I was confused at his demand but decided against questioning it. With one foot in front and moving my left behind I crouched feeling One For All spread through my veins turning into green lightning. But of course there was the reback as I felt creecking echo throughout my body. "Now jump into the air and give a powerful kick." Once again I follow his instructions leaping into the air reeling back my leg. When I gave a powerful kick, immense winds blew a line of trees completely away. I landed so Yagi explained what was the purpose of the action I just took. "When you punched the Nomu you subconsciously changed from 100% on your arm to around 5%, effectively not breaking your arm." My eyes widen in relizingtion. "And you said you can't move at 20% right? So all you would need to do-" "-Is change perengate power at the moment of impact!" I exclaimed finishing -more like cutting off- what Yagi tried to say.  "That's right. During your fight with Todoroki what did you do to aim your smashes increasing precision?" I moved my middle finger back as my thumb held it down in a flicking motion. This was the answer he was asking for. "Right again. For training you should practice changing from 8% to 20%." I decided to test it out aiming my hand at a nearby tree. "From 8%..." I moved my thumb allowing my middle to flick outwards. "...To 20%!" The result of the impact was almost exactly the same from the kick I'd done a minute ago. However the timing was a bit off so I felt the strain of 20% throughout my body. "I'm surprised you were able to do it on the first try. I'm proud." Yagi praised getting me to smile. "Here's a tip. When using that techupe you should change back to the perenage after releasing. It's definitely going to take much practice but I'm sure you'll succeed." Deactivating Full Cowling, I faced towards him nodded my head. "Thank you Yagi. I can see an open path now." No Ones Pov... The day flew by an Saturday rolled in. Todoroki and Bakugou not having provisional licence training joined the rest of Class 1A for practice. "Come on Midoriya! You're as stiff as Iida's arms!" Mina shook her head in disapproval. "You need to relax!" She jumped criss crossing her legs in and out before doing a 360 spin and snap. Midoriya did as he was told while Iida, Ojiro, Shoji, Toru, and Asui followed the advice and completed the 4-step dance. "Nice! Now let's try this!" Mina began moving on to a 6-step dance meanwhile a certain blond third year hid behind the bushes. "Nobody has noticed me yet...That means I can make a joke stealing a laugh-" But Unfortunately his plans were foiled when Midoriya noticed his Senpai. "Togata!" However he refused to give up disappearing behind the bush until his rear poked through. "Here's a peach!" But alas his plans were once again foiled by a small white-haired girl. "Eri!" Midoriya once again cheered completely missing his Senpai's joke. Eri didn't waste any time jumping into her other heroes arms while Midoriya hugged her securely in his arms. It was the second time she never wanted to part from his grasp. "Eri, what are you doing here?" The rest of the class arrived just in time for Totags explanation. "Nezu didn't want Eri to be overwhelmed being suddenly thrown into an extremely sociable setting like the festival. So he letting her take a tour before it actually begins." "She's so cute!~" Ochako squiled stepping forward a bit behind Midoriya. "I agree, Kero~" When Iida arrived Midoriya stood up next to Togata facing his classmates. "I'm Tenya Iida! Good to meet you." Mineta ran forward. "I can't wait to see how you look in 10 years. I'm M-" He never finished when Midoriya activated full Cowling 15% to send the graped haired boy flying away. "Your name is censored for a reason!" When he deactivated 'Full Cowling,' everyone else tried to introduce themselves but Eri grabbed the hem of Midoriya's shorts hiding behind his leg. Her other hand grabbed the hem of Togata's shirt hiding in between the two. "It's official." Kirishima nodded. "That's right." Sero added. "The captains of Eri's protection squad." Kaminari finished holding his chin. Midoriya rolled his eyes at his friends antics. "Well in that case let's have a break!" Mina decided clapping her hands. ✦✧✦✧✦✧✦ So there Midoriya was. Showing Eri around with Momo Yaoyorozu. Originally Yaoyorozu just tagged along to know Eri better and nobody else came along because it might put pressure on Eri. A certain brutte wanted to be the one but once again the onyx-eyed teen beat her to the punch. Along the way Togata was suddenly dragged away by his friends saying it was an 'urgent matter.' So he entrusted Yaoyorozu and Midoriya to watch over Eri. "Everyone's really busy." Midoriya spoke starting the conversation. Yaoyorozu nodded her head watching someone hammer down a nail. "That's U.A. for you. Always hard working." "Sugoi... ( Amazing... )" Eri said under her breath watching everyone at work. "It really is huh?" Midoriya smiled feeling Eri squeeze his hand. Suddenly, the head of a white dragon appeared in front of them. "Gomenasai! Oh? You two from Class A!" Said Tetsutetsu. "What's this!?" Midoriya and Yaoyorozu eternally sigh at the voice. They would recolize it from a mile away. Sure enough, it was Monoma. However what he said caught the two completely off guard. "Two students having an affair! And have a kid no less!" Internal sighing turned into internal embarrassment making the faces of 'Creati' and 'Deku' go beet red. Eri being the innocent precious child she was had absolutely no clue what was wrong. "Papa and Moma?" This...almost ended the career of two heroes in training. Midoriya decided to explain before things got out of hand. "A-Actually t-this is E-Eri." "Oh! The girl heroes saved! I heard some students got involved so you must be some of them." Tetsutetsu said saving Midoriya and Yaoyorozu the explanation. "Still!" The blond spoke again. "Your slacking off! Don't you have anything better to do! I heard you were doing some concert! Well your going to be blown away by our play! HAHAHAH-" He was cut short when teen wearing a blue and white lined bandana held up a bat knocking him out. "Sorry about him." He said holding the bridge of his nose at the sight of his name 'Awase' written in his friend's blood. "I'm pretty sure he has something wrong up here." Pointing to his own head. Yaoyorozu's eyes widen and she bowed her head. "Arigatou ( Thank you )." Awase was confused at first but then remembered the camp incident when he protected her from the Nomu. "I-It's was no problem honestly!" He quickly stated waving his hands over his embarrassed face. "I didn't get your name before. But I'm guess it's Awase." She said pointing over to his name in blood. He smiled picking up the unconess Monoma. "T-That's right." "You saved me back there so I owe you one." Yaoyorozu thanked once again while Midoriya felt someone he never felt before. Being totally ignored was something he was familiar with even though he knew she didn't to it tenulaly. But Midoriya actually...disliked someone. Bakugou didn't count since he actually gave him a reason to dislike him. But this was the first time Midoriya disliked someone at first sight. Unknown to him, Awase was thinking the same thing about him. "Well we should go now." Yaoyorozu spoke snapping Awase and Midoriya out of their thoughts. "We're currently showing Eri around. We shouldn't waste any more of your guy's time through, keep working hard. Let's go Izuku." Midoriya was amused at the sight of shock on Awase's face when she called him by his first name. In fact he was so ashamed that he grabbed Yaoyorozu's hand making her blush while walking off. "That's right Momo." Awase's shock only increased along with Midoriya's rather happy tone. "Keep working hard! Ja ne! ( See ya! )" Awse recovered from his shock when the three left. "Guess I'll have to ask her out a day before the festival. Zettai! ( Absolutely! )" He took a final glance before sighing aloud.  "Good luck man." Tetsutetsu said before walking off with the head of the dragon. Awase went red dragging Monoma along the floor. "Wait!" He called going after his steel-hearted friend. "How much do you know!?" A few minutes later the two blushing teens let go of each others hand. "S-sorry about that." "I-It's fine..." It was a whisper but Midoriya was able to hear it. Eri still clueless about what was wrong tugged at Midoriya's arm. "Is there something wrong Papa?" He was still embarrassed about the title but nonetheless gave a comforting smile. "Everything's fine." Yaoyorozu looked over at Midoriya and he looked up making eye-contact. They didn't move at first falling into a trance in each other's gaze. His emerald eyes felt like a maze trying to figure out more about him while her onyx eyes felt like a bottomless pit, making him question just how much he really knew behind the name Momo Yaoyorozu. They quickly realized what they were doing become red red for what seemed like the hundredth time that day. He cleared his throat not wanting for the situation to become more awkward. "S-so Yaoyorozu. Have any ideas on where to go next?" She took a breath steadying her racing heart. "Y-yeah. I heard Kendo entered something called a beauty pageant." "Beauty pageant?" Midoriya repeated as the three began to make their way. "In that case why didn't you join?" He asked not realizing what he had just said. "I-I'm flattered. But I want to give 100% for our dance. I don't think I would have time anyway." "Guess that makes sense." He looked down at Eri who just looked at him in curiously with her red eyes. Smiling he gives her hand a squeeze. "I hope you and Togata watch our dance. It's gonna be fun!" She nodded grabbing Yaoyorozu's hand surprising her. Attempting to smile, she squeezes both hands. "I'd love to watch Papa's and Mama's dance." "Kawaki! ( Cute! )" A voice called out. They looked up and saw none other than Nejire Hado floating down to their level. "Did you two adopt? Why are you here?" The greenie nervously chuckles at the blue haired woman's natural exciting energy. "Answer to the first one is no. As for the second, we're showing Eri around." "Eri!" Another voice called, it was from Togata who just entered the room. "Where were you?" Midoriya asked referring on what was so 'urgent.' "Thanks for taking care of Eri!" "He completely dodged the question..." Midoriya and Yaoyorozu thought in unison. "Well we should get going. Our break is almost over." Yaoyorozu informed slipped out from Eri's grip but not before giving a smile. "We should go Izuku." He nodded in understanding and patted  Eri's hand. "Well Momo and I gotta go. You think you can finish your tour with Togata?" Eri nodded her head and walked towards Togata. Just when the two first years were about to leave the room the white-haired girl called after her. "Bye Papa and Mama!"  Anyone within hearing distant instantly turned towards the embassrssed teens. "The embarrassment never stops..." Yaoyorozu just nodded her head as they made their way to Class 1A. The day was just filled embarrassing moments so who knew what was going to happen next? A week later his question was answered when Mina dressed like a member of the F.B.I placed a hand on his shoulder looking up at him since he was 5'9. "Midoriya Izuku...you fired."

[ceejay1163]

The Teal* Bronco (*Turquoise)

First off I want to tag the amazing @aquadolan whose hilariously accurate reaction videos make me laugh cry every time I see them and makes me feel like we are experiencing the video together and having a laugh like a couple of mates despite being in opposite sides of the world.

Now for my reactions to 'Tricking my brother into thinking his car was flipped'

The ring mmhmmm just yes

The clapping tho? Not about it

Ethan has a shorter attention span then me and that's impressive

I did not pick the boys to like roller skating although they ice skate so it makes sense

Little bitch haha

I like the jumper. It looks fuzzy and cozy

How long did this take to plan? Honestly it seems like it would be taken forever

Roasting the matchingness to the car

He seems to actually be jealous that Gray's favourite car isn't the one he bought. That's adorable. Fuck I'm not even 2 mins into the video

And now the car is broken

Wait did I fuck up? Am I recording?

The gum Ethan. Eww for fuck sake mate don't be a pig.

'I have really bad attentional problems' yeah.. your English might need some work too

When's the last time I ate? -literally something I say most days

Roast him for dropping out of school and not remembering common phrases and sayings

Why do all Ethans pranks involve Graysons cars?

Also not wanting to say what time you wake up. Same

Laughing at yourself

I'm cool, I'm cool actually no I'm not

Groggy or drunk?

Slap. Pain kink anyone?

That damn projector

Air quotes

Did anyone understand the car mumbo jumbo? Like at all? Did anyone care?

Good job keeping a straight face Ethan. He won't suspect a thing.

Fun-ny

Why do boys turn everything into challenges? My nephews do it all the time

Full actor mode

Too many words in Google mate. Google doesn't care why you need a Photoshop artist

More air quotes. Except out of sync.

It's just a prank bro.

Bitter he can't go skating. Poor bubba

Morning voice half an octave lower. Yes please

Groaning. Thank you

I always end up falling asleep at least twice after waking up the first time before getting up. V relatable

Him jumping into bed to pretend to be asleep reminds me of being a kid and bolting through the house in the middle of the night after getting up to get a drink or something, trying to avoid monsters or waking up the parents

Jumpers with shorts?

He's got slippers. Awww

Realising a flaw in his plan when the car doesn't work.

Too many cars in the driveway

CRINGEY PHOTOS. WOO.

Fucking drama queen

That stupid photoshopped photo

Real us. Not actor mode us haha

Mr Dolan 😏

Doesn't analyze it too much. Good idea

He has such bloke-ish child like writing

The calf tattoo 🥺

Socks and slides Grayson? That's almost as bad as socks and sandals. Fucking hell

Love a man in light grey sweats

Run Ethan go back to bed. You're so grounded (idk)

He pulled Ethans hip so hard. Jesus

What is that bike thingy in the background?

WHO DOESN'T LOCK THEIR FUCKING CAR??? YOU FUCKING IMBECILE

Now Gray let's put on our big boy thinking caps. It's not Ethans fault. Entirely. You also didn't lock the fucking car

Booty 👀

Not knowing if you have insurance. Mate you should look into that. (Also a very me thing to not know)

Gray is loosing it. Like actually looks like he's gonna do the frustrated crying thing

"That's not chill you need to fix that." Pretty sure sleeping is pretty chill. Also how does one fix being a heavy sleeper (other then by having kids)

"You need to be able to wake up in the morning and get shit done" no need to call me out like that

Let me call the *mumble mumble mumble*

It's fucking turquoise- whelp fuck have to change the title

Who steals a turquoise car at 9am? He's loosing it

Awe he doesn't want people to get hurt. Cutie

Seriously why hasn't he called the police yet? When I got home from my nanas funeral to find my house broken into the first thing I did was call the cops. And then cry cos it was like 10pm and I'd just driven like 12 hrs so I was hella tired

He's V loud. And then V quiet.

You motherfucker. Ok rude but understandable

That sigh of relief and the laughter

All of the adrenaline just left Gray immediately. Also hiding under a blankie? adorable

"Where did you put it?" Immediately forgets haha

Did you ruin it and turn it pink or something? You're getting a rep E and why does Gray assume it would be painted pink?

The sound effect over Gray pulling up his pants to hide his plumbers crack 😂

You need to rub it out. I mean ok sure

"I kinked up bro" just why 😂

Slap. SPINNING. It's a theme park ride

You stole my car- Dude where's my car movie anyone?

Car upside down you say? Forshadowing

Grayson gives up on life.

Nope never mind he's dramatically throwing himself onto the bed and screaming into the blankets like a teenage girl

Also booty

FROG

Don't dance Grayson

It's all in the puff bro

Mr Dillon, not Dolan, Dillion

Grayson has left the building look

Nose boop

The eye movement. Wait you what?

Beard pulling

Give me the phone. No you are having the phone. Ok fine.

Intense eye contact for real tho

That dumbass look on his face. Grayson is shooketh to hell

Do they even understand any of this car mumbo jumbo? Does it even make any sense?

I don't know shit about insurance. Seriously dude that's not smart

MY CAR

That's not chill bro that's not chill at all. Putting them on a ban for the words chill and bro. More to be added. They use those words more then I use the word mate and that's impressive

I'm taking the phone and subtly suggesting human error (negligence) and a potential law suit

Oh you have footage? Talk to my older brother

I don't know much about cars. Dude

More stupid looks from Gray

I don't wanna see it

More screaming

More yelling Grayson

We can move your car but it's gonna cost you more money

Not falling for that pic

Just put it on the next one. Gray it's not a fucking bus. There's no schedule to have the next one come out. Use your head darlin'

More yelling in the car and swearing

How did he organise the street thing? Like actually.

Also surely it's illegal to pretend to have roadworks and fuck up traffic

VROOM. You go lil blue car

BULGE 👀 this is when I stopped paying attention the first time I watched it.

What is the camera guy (kyle?) wearing? Who said that be one were allowed to be a thing again? I'm not impressed

Grayson is v frustrated

DON'T LITTER

Neither of you should be allowed to dance. Its not good

That's the wrong question to ask about the camera guy's clothes

Fist clap

Wait where's the car? Is it safe? Poor Gray his brain is malfunctioning

Camera goes to Grayson. Ooh look bulge. Pans away. Move back ooh bulge.

If they keep upping the ante someone's gonna get hurt

I don't know what's inside of me. Never a good thing to say

Still allergic to dogs 🥺

HOLY SHIT THAT HAPPENED

I haven't heard you scream that much for that long 👀

Grayson's pretty loud. I would like to test that. Please and thank you.

Deep breathing

SOOOO HARD. (I volunteer)

I am going to prank the actual s out of Ethan. Really taking the not swearing thing seriously huh

Sure whatever you say. He doesn't believe you'll get him back Gray. Kick his ass

Bruh

Eric deserves a medal for his phone acting. Well done faceless dude named Eric

I give up. I give up on everything. If that's not a fucking mood

Double bitched sounds like it should mean something else. Just saying

Boob caress

My guard's up. No your guard can't be up. Pretty sure that's not how it works Grayson

Just don't hurt me. Grayson is so not listening to him. He's still mad

No rules

It was fake There's no rules

Ethan being hurt Gray doesn't love his present

Still mad.

Rubs sweat all over comfy jumper. Childish

HE STILL LOOKS FUCKING LIVID.

Alrighty take three of finishing this thing. Tumblr crashed yesterday after I spent like 2 hours writing this and deleted half my comments. I couldn't finish it then cos it was almost 2am and I had work today so I redid it from like the 20 minute mark of the video. Then I saved it to my drafts And published it but it deleted the last like 5 minutes of comments so I had to redo them again. Here's hoping Tumblr sorts it's shit out cos it's late and I have work again tomorrow. 🐨

[conspiracieys-archive]

21?’s Tag

I was tagged by the very lovely @cthulhuwithtea

Rules: Answer 21 questions and then tag 21 people who you want to get to know better.

Nickname: Mercy !

Zodiac: Gemini binch!

Height: iunno. like 5′6?

Last Movie I Saw: uhh.... might have been Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales ?

Last Thing I Googled: ................................... ahegao

Favourite Musician: the ever lovely Ms. Ella Fitzgerald!!!!!

Song Stuck In My Head: Seaside Rendezvous by Queen!

Other Blogs: i mean i have them but i’m such a depressed slacker that i don’t rly use them anymore :( i wanna get back into my mag7 blog but it’s difficult by myself cause i need ppl to bounce ideas off of... cries

Do I Get Asks: YA ... i’m The Dusan Nemec Bitch or something :///// i love him and i love talking about him

Following: i follow a mismatch of blogs? who knows what content i’ll see when i log into this hellscape

Amount Of Sleep: anywhere from 2 to 18 hours lmao

Lucky Number: 2!!

What Am I Wearing: got on some leggings, a tank top, my Rockies hoodie, and a blanky. (bonus: got my fucken space heater pointed right at me) 

Dream Trip: i wanna go back to Vegas! also i am gonna eventually haul my ass up to Canada, also eventually i wanna study cooking in Mexico

Dream Job: i want to own my own small restaurant one day! not a big stressful one, but a small, only moderately stressful one. that presents a good challenge!

Play Any Instrument: i WISH. not anyMORE. i used to play violin when i was 10, but the classes were not going at the pace i was learning, and when i don’t learn fast enough i tend to get bored and quit... so ;__; we are trying to learn again.

Languages: like.. mild Spanish. i can ask where the bathroom is :/ i am DESPERATE to become fluent in Spanish but i have no motivation to do anything so... yeehaw

Favourite Songs: Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off by Ella&Louis, Love of My Life by Queen, Lollipop by MIKA

Random Fact: walter white gazes at me every single day................... he protecc.........

Describe Yourself As Aesthetic Things: honestly i can’t think about myself in a positive way right now

First Fandom: .... Naruto ://

Tagging: @bikuai ... platinum please. @lcorrasami cindy my LOVE !!!, @pastelnuva pwease..., idk... anyone else ?? i guess ? omg

[firecrackerwrites]

It’s 3 :45am and I’m just thinking about Christy and Rhett taking the kids on a trip. Link finally falls deep into headspace after fighting it for awhile but this causes him to be super clingy and clumsy and NEEDY. Rhett tried to keep him on a routine but it’s hard they are on vacation and his bed is different and he wasn’t allowed to bring all of his stuffed friends and it’s just hard.

wtf friend, you neeD SLEEP OMG!! I hope you���ve slept since you sent me this! OHHHHH goodness that vacation is not much of a vacation at first for poor Rhett, though. Like, the girls have a nice time, they go down to the beach or whatever and go to the spa and have a good time getting makeovers or whatever but poor Link....is not doing good. He tries so hard not to drop but when they get to the hotel room/suite he’s had enough, he’s not trying to drop but his mind just decides he’s had ENOUGH thank you! he just drops SO HARD and he’s so clumsy his hands don’t work right and his dexterity is completely gone which makes him cry MORE in addition to being tired from airports and stuff and he doesn’t have his stuffed animals he only has his blanket and one of his pacis because he had to ration room for little stuff in his suitcase. Link didn’t even want to bring any of his stuff because he was fighting so hard, but Christy put her foot down and made him bring stuff anyway which honestly little Link is glad for because really he doesn’t know why he fought so hard, it’s kinda nice laying there on the sofa with the tv playing and he’s got his blankie and Bubba is talking to him all soft and it’s just so nice??? why would big Link be upset about this??? but anyway basically the first like day or two is Rhett staying in with Link because Link has decided that nobody else gets to see Rhett but him and he’s going to become essentially a clingy baby koala and cry whenever Rhett isn’t in the room RIGHT THERE with him or cuddling with him. Rhett tries to keep to their usual routine to help him get used to the drop better but the bed doesn’t have bumper rails on it so he stays in bed and they don’t have his nightlight or his white noise machine so Link pretty much won’t sleep or nap unless he’s cuddled up with Rhett in Rhett’s bed (which kinda makes Jessie a little jealous because she wasn’t supposed to drop but she does just a little because SHE was supposed to share a bed with Rhett but now the BABY won’t let her??? but she eventually cools off because Christy is a top notch cuddler and gives amazing hugs) 

[donewithjeon]

MICHELLEEE

OH OH P.S: I’M SORRY FOR NOT SENDING A MESSAGE SOONER I REALLY REALLY REALLY WANTED TO LIKE EVERY DAY I WAS THINKING I WANT TO SEND MICHELLE A MESSAGE BUT THEN LIFE GOT IN THE WAY >\\\

TODAY IS JANUARY 18 2018 AND I COUNTED DOWN THE DAYS UNTIL YOU WERE TO ARRIVE BACK HOME WOOOOOOOOOO WELCOME HOME YAAAAAAYYY IM GLAD YOURE SAFE AND OMGOMG DO TELL US THE ADVENTURES YOU HAVE HAD !! WE SHALL LISTEN TO IT ALL !!!! IM DOING WELL TOO I HAD A CO-OP INTERVIEW YESTERDAY TO HELP OUT AT A VETERINARY CLINIC AND TECHNICALLY IT WAS MORE INFORMATIVE SO I THINK I GOT THE POSITION (it sounds super big but i’m gonna be like a little observer there ahahahahah) ALSO MY EXAMS ARE STARTING NEXT WEEK—

— UNTIL THE END OF THE MONTH AND IM NERVOUS I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO EXPECT AHHH I SHALL JUST STUDY MY HARDEST !!! OKAY BYE BYE I TALKED FOR TOO LONG AHAHAHA ~ one of your biggest fans P.S.: TUMBLR SHOULD INCREASE THEIR CHARACTER COUNT BECAUSE IM SCARED ITLL EAT MY MESSAGES AND THEN YOU ONLY GET HALF THE MESSAGE AND THATLL JUST SOUND FUNNY ://// OKAY NOW BYE BYEEEEE AND WELCOME BACK AGAIN YAAAAAAAAAY

I feel absolutely horrible for taking so long to get back to your wonderful messages. I hope you can forgive me. ;__; It has been a hectic couple of months, and while they were amazingly fun, I have to say I’m happy to be reverting back to my regular schedule and pace. And of course, I’m happy to finally have time to reply back to you. ♥

Thank you so much for the well wishes before the trip! I did have a chance to see it on my phone when I was abroad, and although I couldn’t respond at the time, I want to tell you that I really appreciated it. It was definitely freezing in Korea, but surprisingly (and thankfully) I didn’t get sick during my trip! I’m sure that you helped with that by sending me your good vibes hehe. :>

Please don’t be sorry about not messaging me sooner! I’m the biggest culprit of that right now. ): I hope you’re still doing well and that you were able to rest a bit during your winter break. Oh god, I don’t even want to think about catching up with Bangtan. I missed so much in the time I wasn’t on social media. I hope your endeavors were more successful than I know mine will be haha.

Even though I might not be able to go on Tumblr when I have other events happening in my life, I hope that you still know that I am always rooting for you as well. Don’t ever forget that I will support you and everything you aim to do! (ღ˘⌣˘ღ) I hope that you will continue to talk to me, because I will continue to be here for you if you ever want to tell me anything~

Now onto the more recent asks, THANK YOU AGAIN. Now that I have some time, I will try to go through the photos that I took and make a couple posts about my trip. I have to keep adding to my adventure tag, after all!

Ooh! That sounds so interesting to work at a veterinary clinic. Do you have any updates on that? Even if it’s not super big, it’s still a step forward! Being an observer will help you gain experience if that’s the path you want to take in the future. I honestly wish I did more things like that when I was in high school haha. I was such a lazy student back then. Also, I hope all your exams went well! Whether they did or not, I think you deserve a round of applause just for working so hard and trying your best. (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Ahaha, Tumblr really needs to figure out a better inbox system. Or maybe just fix the whole thing with parts of messages being eaten, because I always am wary of that as well. None of your asks seems to have been eaten this time around though, so yay! I’d call this exchange a success haha. :D

[shark-from-the-park]

FIC: The Fitzier of It, Episode Four

A Fitzier The Thick of It AU in several parts. You can find Episode One here , Episode Two here and Episode Three here. With sincere thanks to @casperthefriendlylittlefan and @coffeesugarcream for their cheerleading and encouragement and to everyone else who has read and enjoyed so far. I love you all, your comments/tags/asks/PM’s make my heart swell.

In this installment, James really does go for broke in his attempts to get hired as Francis’s spin doctor. This certainly won’t awaken anything in him... will it?

Warnings for very bad language, NSFW themes, endlessly snacking LeVesconte and a wild Blanky.

@litttlesilkworm @boisinberryjamarama @thegreenmeridian @cinemaocd @the-jewish-marxist @hereliesnils @nashilena @itisa-profoundbond-sarandom @idlesuperstar @what-a-terrorific-mess @kahootqueen69 @jaredharrisankles @shit-in-silk-stocking @bobbole @fellowshipofthegay @aconfusedwriter @uncannybrightside @glorioustidalwavedefendor @zaphodbeeblebro @sasheenka @intrepid-inkweaver @full-of-terrors @anadequatesir

Contact me via semiphore (or some more convenient method) to be tagged/untagged, or just to say hello/hurl abuse. xXx.

Episode Four

When James strode into Baffin House the next day, his confidence was based on more than just his usual bluster and self-assurance.  

He struck it lucky as soon as he reached the second floor.

Ed Little and Thomas Jopson were sat at a desk together near the elevators, heads bent, chatting and laughing. The sideburn brothers didn’t even notice James as he passed them.  

That just left Blanky.  

Who was, of course, perched on the desk outside Francis’s office door like a guard dog, exchanging friendly banter with two women a few desks over (the term ‘duck’ was being thrown about with bewildering regularity).

James steeled himself and approached the Yorkshireman with his palms up in a gesture of peace.  

He also kept his mouth firmly shut.  

Blanky regarded him with crinkly, laughing eyes, almost fondly.  

“Go on then, Fitzjames, lad. Yer’ve caught me in a good mood.”

James reached into his leather satchel, and with the bare minimum of theatricality (that he was physically capable of), brought out his gifts. One by one he placed them on the desk next to Blanky.  

First came a box of colourful Paperchase paper-clips in the shapes of whales and anchors.

Second, and this one was an educated guess really, a grab bag of steak flavoured McCoy’s.  

Thirdly, a folded slip of notepaper with the words ‘Shadow Cabinet’ written on it in James’s neat handwriting.  

Blanky regarded each gift thoughtfully, picking up and unfolding the slip of paper, reading the contents, then meeting James’s eye.  

Blanky refolded the notepaper and handed it back, the beginnings of a grin on his face.  

He rapped on Francis’s office door three times, then held it open.  

“Go on then, lad. Yer’ve earned it.”

With a tiny sigh of relief, James darted through the door before Blanky could change his mind.  

Francis, elbow deep in some report or other, looked up at James from behind his desk in surprise.  

“Thomas Blanky you useless, traitorous gimp, I should have you flogged!” He bellowed after a moment of silence.  

“He brought me crisps, Frank.  And fancy paper-clips.  I’m not made of stone.”  Blanky closed the office door behind James, effectively trapping him and Francis inside together.  

“Class traitor!” Francis yelled at Blanky before sneering at James across the expanse of his desk and saying; “To what do I owe this pleasure, James?” acidly.  

Realising that he had placed both hands up in a peace gesture again, James swiftly dropped them to his sides, feeling like a twat.  

“I just wanted to talk, Francis. I, uh, I brought you this.” He laid the folded piece of notepaper on Francis’s desk and then took a step back.  

Francis unfolded the paper, read it, peered up at James to give him a quick glare, then read it again.  

“Do you honestly think I don’t already know who I want working with me?  You arrogant, snot-nosed little public school wanker...”  He managed to grind out at last.  

James breathed out slowly through his nose.  

Humility. Humility.  

“The thing is, Francis, it’s not just the list. I, uh, talked to them. All of them. I mean, I vetted them all first, of course. Official and unofficial channels. Did some research into their stances on your key issues. And they’ve all, er, agreed. To back you. To serve on your shadow cabinet and toe the line on your fundamentals. All would be willing to meet with you about it. All committed. I mean, I made it clear that it was all speculative, of course. I made it clear that I was doing it off my own back. And then I found out that you’d already spoken to some of them…  It’s just… I’d really like to work with you, Francis. For you.”  James stopped, feeling light-headed.  

Francis’s mouth kept opening and shutting silently.  His face had gone the colour of cooked lobster.  

James chewed on the inside of his bottom lip and waited.  

Eventually, Francis managed;

“Fucking hell James. Why? Why the fuck… I’m no Sir John. I’m not in this for a fucking seat in the House of Lords. You won’t get me to schmooze with any of the great and good. There’ll be no champagne dinners. No golf. No parties with Richard fucking Branson. Have you lost your mind, James? I’m a backwards, Stalinist potato-fucker with bad dress sense, remember?”

“I’ve never said potato-fucker, Francis. About anyone.”

“I just don’t know what your game is here, James.”

“There is no game. I want to work for you. I think I can help you win.”

“You, Mister privately educated, Oxbridge, gap-year-in-South-East-Asia, Paul Smith ties and expensive haircuts, want to work for this ex-alcoholic, Bangor University graduate, backbench, cardigan-wearing Irish...”

“Look!” James interjected desperately. “Francis... Somewhere along the line, I think you might have gotten the idea that I don’t respect you...”

“Whatever could possibly have given me that impression, James.”  Francis said, steely-eyed.  

“But the thing is, you see, that actually, I -”  James’ larynx tried to seize up over the words and he was forced to clear his throat loudly, feeling colour rise to his face.  “I admire you.” He managed at last in a rushed voice that didn’t sound at all like his own.  

Somehow, he felt as if he’d just said something else.

Utterly exposed.  

Francis looked completely astonished. It didn’t suit him.  

They stared at each other from opposite sides of the room, evidently having run off some sort of conversational cliff.  

James chafed under Francis’s intense blue gaze, but having said his piece he found himself unwilling to back down or look away.  

Seconds ticked by, lengthening into minutes and they just breathed in and out and looked at one another.  

The office door opened and Blanky stuck his head in.

“I’m not sorry for interrupting.” He said. “Yers have been quiet for so long I thought one of you must have killed the other.  Now I see it’s just some sort of homoerotic staring contest. My mistake.” He retreated and shut the door on them again.  

“Alright.” Francis finally ground out from between clenched teeth. “I’ll consider it.”

James, whose brain had snagged on the words ‘homoerotic staring contest’, blinked at him in confusion.  

“You’ll...”

“I’ll consider bringing you and Le Vesconte on board. I’ll meet with the names on your bloody list.”

“Oh. Well. Good. Good.”  James felt as though he were having an out of body experience.  

“Just… liaise with Blanky. Set up the meetings.”

“Alright Francis. And… Thank you...”

James exited Francis’s office as quickly as was humanly possible, only to find Blanky, Ed Little, Jopson and half a dozen others crowded around the door, peering at him with rapt curiosity.  

*****

“Fucking hell, Fitz. It sounds about as nerve-wracking as asking him to a school disco.”

“No, it was worse than that.” Muttered James, strangely subdued. “It was like one of those dreams where you…  No, it was like… Like I accidentally took off my face and showed him the horrific writhing mass of gore that is the real me, for a second...”

“Fuck. That’s deep, Fitz. I’ve known you going on thirty years and I don’t think I’ve ever seen the real you.” Dundy managed around a mouthful of treacle scone.

“Exactly, Dundy. It wasn’t like I meant to do it.” James rubbed a hand over the back of his neck uncomfortably.

“It worked though, didn’t it?  We’ve actually got a shot at being in government!”

“Mmmm? Yeah.”

Dundy looked both worried and worryingly thoughtful for a moment.  

“James?” He spoke gently, as though trying not to spook a horse. “You do realise that you’re in-”

“Shut up.”  James snapped back into gear all at once.  “Come on, we’ve got a lot of work to do.”  

*****

Episode Five here...

[yourjughead]

Wrong side of the tracks pt.4

Pairing: Jughead x reader, Bughead, reader x plot twist hopefully Warnings: Swearing, light smut, issues of abandonment. A/N: Sorry didn't get time to edit this is wrote it straight out of work to get it up for you guys, excuse mistakes I think in irish. I really hope you guys get a little shook from this one or otherwise I'd be sad 😂 definitely more excitement in this one than the other 3 but not as much as part 5....oh the suspense. Also low key regret not calling this series "mentally cursing yourself" because honestly, mood. REQUESTS OPEN. ------------------------------------ 3rd Person. Once again you find yourself jumping at the realisation Jughead is behind you. “Jughead! Stop sneaking up on me! Do that one too many times on the Southside and you'll get yourself stab for fucksake” you said as you playfully shoved him. He smiled back at you sweetly. “Sorry sorry y/n” “and for christ sake stop apologising to me!” you laughed “you're right I'm sor...not sorry”. He smiled down to you, totally captivated by your eyes. “So, how was your first day Kitten” he smiled once again but stopped once he saw your eyes darken. “Don't ever call me that again.” you say bitterly. Jugheads smile faded into confusion “what? I thought it was endearing?” “there is nothing endearing about it” “Okay I'm sor….okay” he turned slightly from you and looked for the bus. You closed your eyes and regretted your words. “Okay it's my turn to apologise now. it's just...its just Ryan calls me that and I'm not exactly his number one fan and he's not mine so if you could...could not” you were expecting to be chewed out of it for some reason but then again Jughead was different and maybe he'd react softer and not push further for more answers. And he did just that.  “Oh yeah I had forgotten that..it's alright, really my mistake anyway...but umm how was your first day” his smile grew again and you both loved and hated him in that moment for being so understanding. If he had been horrible he would have been easier to push and shove away from getting too close. “it was good I suppose except this weird antisocial dude in a beanie is like stalking me” you teased “oh really? Well this girl I ran into once, pardon the pun, literally showed up at my school unannounced and is now in all my classes, weirdo” and you both laughed. Jughead enjoyed the playfulness between you two but still he wondered what happened between you and Ryan. The bus came. “aren't you going to get on” Jughead offered seeing you still fixed to the spot “nah my uncle will bring me home” “can your brother not drive?” “what brother?” you looked at him all kinds of confused. “you said today in your lie to Veronica that your brother had the same hat as me...I was just assuming the brother part of that wasn't a lie” “nope. No brother.” “ahhh...and the enigma that is Y/N Y/L/N is further explored” he smiled with a wave stepping onto the bus. The rest of December had flown by until Christmas had been and gone. Your days were spent much like your first, in the comfortable silence with Jughead while his friends rambled on. Betty had become more cautious of you however and tried to get space between you where possible, which wasn't easy by any means. Jughead and you shared a lot of things in common that they did not. You two had almost every class together and were just simply naturally pulled together and every day you grew closer and closer. This drove Betty mad. You were in fact a little shocked to learn that Jughead and Betty were a thing, which Kevin had divulged one day on the way to Geography when Jughead was sick. You thought she seemed far more into it than he did and Kevin agreed with you but in total confidence.   When you asked Jughead about it he seemed shaken and hesitant to talk about her whereas she was ready and open to discuss him. You wondered why he hadn't mentioned it and you had already been 1 week into your new life at Riverdale High. She had insisted that Jughead spend the whole holiday period with herself and her family which, after careful vetting from social care, went okay enough. If a bit tedious and boring for Jughead. Betty didn't allow Jughead to leave her side. Which drove his spirit wild. It also meant that you and Jughead didn't see each other all holiday. Which you guessed was the idea of the set up. Betty refused to go to the Southside for reasons that Jughead couldn't understand and you couldn't go to Riverdale as your uncle didn't let you unless it was for school or you were supervised. You had decided it would be better to just not see him than have 1000 questions asked about him on the way home and Jughead agreed. It was 2 more sleeps till school started and you missed Jughead terribly. *sms: Jug: hey Juliet, nurse off?, do you wanna go for a walk. I can protect you from all the scary things -5:56am *sms: Y/N/N: Ha.ha Y/N. Yeah sure I'll meet you at pops? I have your Christmas present -5:58am. The Xx had caught you off. Maybe it was a reflex left over from texting Betty. He had gotten to Pops first as you pulled up on your motorbike and parked under the neon red lights.   You had only heard of this place from Jughead and had never been as you liced a little in fear of having to deal with a snappy Betty. The sun was attempting to break through the clouds as you dismounted your bike and walked to the entrance where you met Jug. “are we going to go inside or is there some sort of a forcefield around the place that I can't see” you laugjed “I just thought we could go for a walk and then pops? Besides it's his son manning the place and he doesn't like me very much, thinks I'm a waster” “oh so he's a good judge of character” you smirk and bump into Jughead playfully. You two continue messing about along a path in the woods. He told you more about his book and the other history of the woods before the murder. You stopped at a cliffs edge and looked down at the cascading waterfall as the sun continued to fight and win it's battle with the clouds. You two walked down a little bit further and then sat at the waterfront and enjoyed the sunrise. Jughead POV This is perfect. She is so perfect. I rustled around a little bit in my gear bag before I found her present badly wrapped in newspaper. I gave it to her and once again apologised to her for which she hit me and told me shed do that every time I apologised from now on. The sun is hitting her so perfectly. I watch as she cautiously opened the wrapping and revealed the new vintage Metallica tee and a can of pasta sauce. She burst into laughter but not in a horrible or rude way, in an appreciative, you're an idiot, Y/N kind of way. “thank you Juggy”. Did she just call me Juggy? Are we at that point now where she can call me that...God I hope so. It was her turn to give me a present and although i hadn't expected one I was glad I hadn't overstepped a boundary by buying her something. It was wrapped beautifully and carefully, much nicer than mine. Idiot Jughead idiot. She must have noticed me mentally giving out to myself on seeing the wrapping as she offered “i especially love the wrapping, very Jughead Jones”. What did she mean by love...WHAT DID SHE MEAN. I opened the package and there inside was a metallica tee and a jar of pasta sauce. I looked at her with wide eyes and she at I with a wide smile. Our laughter must have been heard throughout the woods. Idiots, we're both idiots in the best way. We spoke for another hour before we walked back. We decided not go to pops his time as if we stayed out longer we risked getting caught. She drove off on a bike she had said her uncles bought her for Christmas. I wonder where her parents are…. I got back to Betty's around 7.30 am and quietly slipped in the backdoor and took off my boots. I wandered to the couch closing my eyes as I sat down on the edge. I held my new tee tight in my hand like a baby holding their blankie. Just as my head was about to touch the pillow, the light flashed on. Shit. “So juggy..” it didn't sound right coming from her lips after I hearing Y/N say it. No Jughead! no! You like Betty! You know, Betty, the blonde girl next door who is standing in the doorway looking like she was to bury you under the house next door. “you left your phone after you….meeting y/n at this time are we?” she seethed. Wow she was mad. “Umm yeah she needed to talk about some stuff” “and what is that” she hissed pointing at the tee in my grip. “Oh Y/Ns Christmas present to me” i stood and held it to my body modeling it hoping to lighten the mood by tenfold. It didn't..  Betty stepped in and closed the door. She took steps towards me until we were less than arms length apart. “she's not your girlfriend juggy” there it is again, my name but not my name the way I hear it from Y/N. “give it to me. Now.” she practically growled. “ehhh no” i scoffed in return. Mistake. She snatched it from my tight grasp causing it's vintage-ness to catch up with it. It was ripped down the seam at the side. “Betty! What the hell!” it was my turn to be angry. “It was an accident Juggy I swear!” she genuinely sounded sorry. She grabbed hold of me into a hug and I was victim again to her char.m. Her arms were around my shoulders and my arms around her waist. She swayed us gently calming us both down. She kissed me so sweetly at first but soon it turned hungry and lustful. Pushing me back to the couch she was on top of me . She moved from my mouth to my neck causing a slight groan to leave my lips. God I hated how she was in control but I couldn't flip her on the couch or we'd fall. She put a finger to her lips to be quiet as her family were still asleep upstairs. She straddled me and pulled my shirt over my head and began to kiss down my torso. I pulled her back up to my lips wanting to have at least a small bit of control. “Ohh Juggy” she purred in my ear. “ohhh Y/N” I goaned. Shit. 3rd POV Y/N got back to the apartment where she lived alone. Her father was tragically killed when she was younger and her mother ran far away not able to cope with life on the southside any longer. Her care had fallen to her dad's three closest friends. More so like uncles to her now than dad's old friends from “work”. She opened the door of the apartment. She hummed happily as she entered but soon stopped dead in her tracks. She took her pocket knife from her jacket and stepped further into the living room. There the chair was spun around facing a glowing fire. “Well what the fuck are you doing here Ryan” Ryan spun slowly in the chair mimicking that of a Bond villain. “now now Kitten, that's no way to talk to your brother now is it?” -------------------------------- Teehee. Well? Let me what you think!