#His gaze is cold until it softens with sadness towards the end of the song

[ushsblog]

ALL OF YOU

Imagine Cedric singing to Roland "I'm just your problem" from Adventure Time

[weuschoiceheart]

⋘I-Land (OT9) / Enhypen⋙ Love, I-Land

A special collection of stories, for a special group of boys...Happy anniversary to eggies, it’s been a year since I-Land announced the first batch of trainees, a year since we all dive into this roller coaster ride of a show.

~ Inspired by Taylor Swift’s love songs ~

Tagging: @mari-kigold @akira-star @affectionaterainoflove @enhypenthusiast @periwinkle-ink

Warning: suggestive in K’s part (just a brief makeout session), angsty in some parts BUT there’s fluff to make up for it, cursing (literally all my works have curse words in them, I can’t write without making the characters curse at least once lmao)

Word Count: 6k+

K - Wildest Dreams ; passionate love

You didn’t know how you two ended up like this.

It was just a simple school project, and you’ve told yourself it was going to be nothing more than that. That's what you kept repeating in your head, over and over again as you called him over. Yet in your heart, you knew you just wanted him all over you again, even if it’s just temporary, even though you knew it would tear you apart.  

Nothing lasts forever...but this is gonna take me down.

You shouldn’t be doing this.

You shouldn’t be making out with the school’s enigma, you shouldn’t have invited him to your house in the first place, knowing it would end up like this, with your lips latched onto his. You shouldn’t be reciprocating the kiss, his mouth hot against yours, one hand tangled in your shirt to bring you ever closer, the other wrapped tight around your waist that you knew it would leave bruises. And most of all, you shouldn’t be enjoying this as his lips moved down your neck, his warm breath tickling your sweet spot, tongue flicking over your collarbone.

Because you knew this moment would be your last, before he disappears and leaves you with a gaping hole in your heart.

K finally pulls away, panting slightly as he tilts his head, a cute gesture that doesn’t match the smirk on his face. “Your lips are so red.”

Bringing a hand up to touch them, you knew they were swollen from the amount of times he bit and nipped at them. Your eyes flicked to his, before looking away. “Well, so are yours.”

K studied you for a bit, his gaze searching, making you feel suddenly small under his glare. What is he thinking? After a moment, he lets go of you, standing up and straightening out his shirt. “I’m going to go. See you tomorrow.”

And suddenly, you felt that panicky feeling in your chest again, and the fear came rushing back. You don’t know if you’ll see him tomorrow, or ever again. Those were just casual words, something to say instead of “goodbye,” because some part of you, maybe it was just wishful thinking, hopes he feels the same. But K isn’t like that. He’s like the autumn breeze that comes and goes, before sending your life into winter without his presence. He never abides by the rules, and floats in that gray area in between, where your relationship with him also lies.

You knew what you were getting into when you kissed him on the rooftop that day, knew that it would only cause you pain. You don’t want your time with him, all these passionate moments of love, to disappear until you can only recall them in your wildest dreams.

Your body reacts before you can think, grabbing his arm as he turned to the door. He stiffened in your grasp, but didn’t make an effort to break away.

“Stay, please.” You mentally curse your voice for sounding so weak, the hand on his arm trembling.

K turned around to face you again, his cold, calculating eyes softening as they met your uncertain ones. His arm finally relaxed, and he sat down again.

“Alright.”

Heeseung - Superstar ; idol love

“I swear to god, why aren’t they picking up?” you tapped your phone in frustration, frowning. As if on cue, a message lit up your screen, and you opened it, curious to see the reason behind your friend’s unresponsiveness.

Sorry, I won’t be able to make it to the concert. I’m working on a project with K.

“K, huh?” you shook your head at your friend’s words. “Aren’t they afraid that he’ll break their heart? Project, my ass.”

Sighing, you pocketed your phone. There’s not much you can do to convince them that their relationship with K was only going to hurt them, but you couldn’t stop the two from having their hands all over each other, ever since your friend came to you screeching about their first kiss on the school rooftop. Like some romantic K-drama where a bad boy falls for the good girl.

Well, not like your love life is any better....

You shook your head, deciding to push these thoughts out of your head and go enjoy your school’s spring concert by yourself. At least you’ll be able to stare at Heeseung all you want without your friend teasing you.

A small twinge of sadness echoed in your chest at the thought of Heeseung, but you quickly pushed that out of your mind. You weren’t here just for him, of course. Youngbin and Geonu were doing a duet, Seon had a sexy solo that he’s been bragging about for weeks, and Nicholas, Jaeho, and the rest of their dance team prepared a special stage as well. So no, as much as you like spending most of the time ogling Heeseung, you were there to support your friends, have a good time off from your studies, and ignoring these annoying fangirls that always surround him—

Yeah, right. You knew it all circles back to Heeseung eventually.

Kicking at some pebbles on the ground, you sighed and realized that the guards were about to close the entrance doors soon. Joining the queue of parents and students, you handed your ticket to the theater teacher (who fixed you with a scrutinizing stare, perhaps remembering you as that problematic theater student she took under her wing a few years ago) and entered the auditorium. The lights dimmed, and the show began. 

You screamed yourself hoarse during the performances, cheering on your friends (turns out Seon’s performance did live up to the epic stage he was talking about, you saw the girls—and some boys—practically drooling), and the thought of Heeseung left your mind. Until the final encore, that is, when he and Geonu took center stage to cover “Butterfly” by BTS.

Your eyes widened as he started singing, heart racing a million miles per hour. A smile unconsciously made its way onto your face, and your breath caught in your throat as his eyes flickered over the audience. As if reading your mind, they landed on you, leaving you breathless. Please notice me...oh my god, his eyes are so pretty....

“Did you see that? He made eye contact with me!” the girl beside you squealed, and the moment was gone. The smile wiped off your face, and you turned to her, seeing her beaming at the same boy you were looking at before. Your gaze broke away to scan the masses of people staring at the boys on stage with love-struck expressions on their faces, and suddenly you just feel...alone. Some part of your heart broke, and it was like reality struck you across your face.

You were just another wide-eyed fan desperately in love with a superstar who doesn’t even know your name.

That revelation followed you outside after the concert ended, and as if the weather understands your thoughts, it had started pouring outside. Rummaging around in your bag, only to come up empty, you gulped down your tears and resolved to walk home without an umbrella. Damn it, you should’ve come prepared!

Well, you can’t really prepare for heartbreak, can you?

You hadn’t gone two paces however, when you felt something opening up above you, and turning, you almost had a heart attack upon seeing Heeseung standing beside you. He held an umbrella over you both, his eyes darting from you to the ground, a small blush painted across his cheeks. He seemed fidgety, unlike the confident boy on stage moments ago, and you’re left speechless. An awkward silence passed between you two, before he cleared his throat.

“You’re really cute—I mean, you’re Y/N from my research class, right?” You nodded, internally screaming at the fact that he just called you cute. “I...I, um, I saw you didn’t have an umbrella and it’s really pouring out here, so uh-” he laughed nervously, a small grin forming on his lips as he stared at you expectedly. “Do you want to share?”

Jake - Fearless ; first love

“Bleh, sappy couples,” you shook your head, wrinkling your nose at the scene in front of you. Then again, everyone basically called you and Jake a sappy couple, so you really shouldn’t be saying anything.

Speaking of Jake, you caught him running down the road towards you, his umbrella jostling over his head. Laughing to yourself, you watched as the umbrella caught on another, then got tangled in a whole mess of umbrellas. Jake quickly disentangled his from the rest, apologizing profusely to the party of concert-goers who only shook their heads and motioned for him to go. Giving them a slight nod, he ran up to you, thankfully with no further mishaps, stumbling to a stop in front of you.

“Hi,” he said breathlessly, beaming at you. You swear every time you look at him, it was like falling for him all over again. Despite the cold and the rain, the feeling spread all over you and you felt suddenly warm and fuzzy.

“Let’s go.” You grabbed his hand, and he tucked you under the umbrella, arm wrapped around your waist. The two of you began walking home. “How was the concert?”

“Amazing, though I still wish you got to perform,” you snuggled up to his side, unable to keep a smile off your face. Jake sighed, somewhat regretfully.

“You know I have to work overtime this week, or I won’t be able to pay the rent for the apartment.”

“I know, I know.” You turned to him, eyeing the dark bags under his eyes. “You look exhausted....hey, you should’ve gone home to rest, not come out in the rain to pick me up. You can catch a cold—”

“I don’t want you to walk home by yourself after dark, it’s too dangerous,” Jake interrupted. He grinned at you, and you felt like your heart was gonna melt. Is this what love feels like? Then I’m glad that he’s my first.

The two of you were almost home, when you realized that you were approaching the abandoned parking lot near your house. An idea struck you then, and you suddenly grabbed Jake’s hand, startling him out of his rant about the shitty customer at the cafe.

“Come on, let’s dance in the rain.”

“Huh?” Jake’s eyebrows knit into a frown. “Weren’t you worried about catching a cold a few minutes ago?”

You shook your head, a cheeky grin on your face. Your heartbeat quickened, a shot of adrenaline rushing through you. You weren’t usually like this, but you thought back to the shows you watched, and well, first love means trying something new, right? “The rain is letting up Jake, we’ll be fine. Please?”

A flicker of doubt crossed his face, and you thought he was going to say no, before he nodded and closed the umbrella. You let out a gasp as the cool drops hit your face, and a loud squeal when Jake grabbed your hand and twirled you around the parking lot.

You thought this only existed in movies, but it’s all real. You’re dancing with the love of your life, fearlessly, in the middle of a rain shower. His hands clasped around your waist, a wide smile stretching from ear to ear as you grabbed onto his shoulders and he lifted you off your feet, like the ballroom dances in these old fashioned films. The wind whistled in your ears, the rain splashing on the sidewalk sounds like music. You couldn’t stop laughing, and neither can he, and you knew you were going to remember this moment for the rest of your life.

However, your strength gave out after a while, and the two of you stood there, swaying side to side. At this point, you couldn’t care that your clothes are wet and sticking to your skin, and you lean your forehead against Jake’s. He giggled, small droplets of water trailing down from his soaked hair. And he slowly leans in, the distance between you two shortening, your hands begin to shake as your breath quickens.

Is he going to—?

Sensing your nervousness, he grabbed one of your hands in his, pulling you in. You felt a little more brave as you tugged at the front of his shirt in your other hand, and connected your lips, at last.

It’s a first kiss, it’s flawless, really something, it’s fearless.

Jay - Ours ; long distance love

Lucky Jake, you muttered to yourself, sighing as you rested your head on the counter. He doesn’t have to deal with stupid customers at this time, and at least he has more experience with people yelling at him. Or maybe you’re just jealous that he has someone to hang out with, go on dates with, and laugh by his side.

You smiled sadly to yourself and took out your phone, opening the photo gallery. You felt a pang of nostalgia and wistfulness as you clicked on the first photo of you and Jay. It was from your date at the shopping mall, where Jay had chosen several outfits and forced you to try them on. It was a time where you had let your insecurities get the best of you, and Jay was having none of it. The photo was of him hugging you after you tried on one of the outfits he picked out.

You look beautiful, you can hear him say. Stunning, amazing, don’t ever doubt yourself again.

I won’t, you had murmured back. Thank you, love.

“Seriously, is this some sort of playhouse? Can’t even do their job right....”

Your head quickly shot up, eyes widening at the intimidating businessman in front of you. Fuck, not him again....

He rolled his eyes at you. “Two large cups of mocha latte with a half shot of espresso. And make it quick, I’m in a hurry.”

You purse your lips in disdain. “Yes, sir.”

Putting your phone away, you sighed as you began making his order. If Jay was here, he would’ve made you laugh by making fun of his attitude, or just straight up told the man off. But he’s not here, and he’s not going to help you out, you thought to yourself, gritting your teeth together as you mixed the coffee. He’s working for that fashion company in Paris, so just let him live his dream. C’mon, Y/N, just make this damn coffee, give it to that damn businessman who can’t keep his damn mouth shut—

“Be careful, you idiot! You’re going to spill them!”

You snapped out of your daze, again, by the harsh voice of the customer, who grabbed the two coffees, spilling foam over your hands, causing you to hiss in pain. And he had the audacity to walk away muttering, “Gosh, I’m never coming back to this shitty place again.”

Swallowing the pain, you went to wash your hands at the sink. It’s part of the job, there will always be some people yelling at you, it’s not your fault, you tried to comfort yourself, though you were sick and tired of this. This endless routine, the fake smiles you have to put on, a gaping hole in your heart you can’t cover up. It’s been over a year since Jay has gone, and suddenly, you missed him more than ever. Frustrated, you turned the faucet off, almost yanking it off the sink in the process. Burying your face in your hands, your mind wandered to something Jay had told you, right before he left for the trip.

Don’t you worry your pretty little mind, people throw rocks at things that shine.

You smiled at Jay’s words, and took a deep breath, calming yourself down. You will get through this. Drying your hands off on a towel, you smooth out the wrinkles in your shirt and set your face in a hard line. Just a few more hours, and you’ll finally get off work. You can do this.

Making your way to the counter again, you prepared to put on your custom smile and act like the cheerful barista you were supposed to be. “Hello! How may I—”

“Y/N?”

Your breath caught in your throat, as your eyes met the person you were just thinking about. No, it’s not possible, how— The two of you stared at each other in disbelief, before Jay’s face relaxed into a bright smile, and he opened his arms.

You ran out from behind the counter and wrapped your hands around him. Nuzzling your face into the crook of his neck, you held on tight, and that’s when the tears came, happy and sad at the same time.

Jay didn’t say anything, for there was no need to use words when actions and feelings showed it all. He grasped you in his arms, body shaking slightly as he blinked back the tears from his own eyes. I’m finally back home.

The two of you stood there for who knows how long, but you couldn’t care less. No matter how many annoying customers you have to face, no matter how many times coffee spills all over you, nothing can separate you from what is yours.

You can say what you want, but this love is ours.

Sunoo - Sparks Fly ; pure love

You and Sunoo quietly crept out of the cafe, not wanting to disturb the couple hugging by the counter. Unfortunately for you two though, it had started raining outside, and none of you brought an umbrella.

“Really? And the forecast said it wouldn’t rain,” Sunoo grumbled, pouting. “The weather person needs to get fired.”

You laughed at his words, resisting the urge to pinch his cheeks. “They’re just trying to do their job, Sunoo. I mean, it’s not that bad....should we just make a run for it?”

Sunoo gasped dramatically. “And mess up our hair? How will I take our end-of-the-date selfie with our soggy selves?”

You rolled your eyes, “we can use our school bags to cover us. I mean, it’s either that, or be late to our movie night.”

Sunoo mulled over it for a moment, scrunching his nose in concentration. “Oh, fine. But we’re sticking to the cover until we have to cross the street.”

“Deal.” The two of you shuffled along the awning of the cafe, until you reached the end of the street where the crosswalks are. You two looked at each other, hunching your bookbags over your head. One hand holding onto your bag, you stretched your hand out to Sunoo, a smile crossing both of your faces as he took it.

“One.”

“Two.”

“Three. GO!”

The two of you dashed out into the rain, laughing and screaming like little kids. A wild, childish bliss took over you, and you couldn’t stop giggling as you gripped tightly onto Sunoo’s hand. He looked over at you, and you can see that he was having the time of his life as well, smiling so much that his eyes seemed to disappear. You wish time could stop at that moment, as rain poured down around you two, the happy feeling in your chest expanding with love.

All too soon, your journey ended as you two rushed up, panting, to the door of your house. Letting your bags fall over your shoulders, the two of you turned to each other and laughed. You reached over to part the hair from his eyes, and he playfully flicked his head, spraying water on your face. You let out an indignant yelp, before lightly pushing him, then reaching to catch him again before he slips down the wet steps. Sunoo held onto your arm, trying to contain his laughter, though his bright smile gave it away.

“Gosh, we’re a mess,” you said as you tried to catch your breath. Putting your bag down, you fumbled in your pocket for your keys. “But you know what? Let’s do that again next time.”

“Well, hopefully we’ll actually remember to bring an umbrella next time,” Sunoo said, shaking out his wet bag. He grinned at you, and you swear you can see sparks fly whenever he smiles.

Jungwon - Mine ; enduring love

You trudged down the street, not minding the fact that you’re thoroughly soaked by the rain. Everything felt like a blur around you as your mind kept replaying the scene from moments before, and the tears came streaming down your face again, mingling with the drops from the sky. The sound of laughter pierced through your reverie, and you turned to see a couple giggling together at the front steps of their house, the sight making your heart squeeze.

What went wrong?

We were like them too, so what happened to us?

Sniffing, you wiped your nose with the back of your hand, turning away from the scene. Looking around, you realized that you had walked farther away from the house than you expected, and that it was already dark. Should I go back? As much as you don’t want to confront Jungwon right now, you don’t want him to worry either. Would he even worry though? Maybe this really is the end...

Making up your mind, you resolved to just keep walking, until you finally decided on what to do. Taking out your phone, you texted your friend whether you can stay over at theirs tonight. Slipping the device back into your pocket, you continued plodding along.

Until someone grabbed your arm, and you screamed.

“Y/N, it’s me! It’s me.”

Whirling around, your heart rate slowed as you made eye contact with your boyfriend. The rain had slowed to a drizzle now, and you saw that his eyes were red, like he had been crying too.

“Jungwon...” you extricated your arm from his hold, and took a deep breath. “What are you doing here?”

“I ran after you,” he mumbled, looking down at the ground. “After you left.”

You blinked in surprise, not expecting that answer. “O-oh.”

Not knowing what to say, the two of you stood there, and each passing minute felt like a wall growing bigger and bigger between you two. You didn’t know how the two of you even ended up like this—an offhand comment, which somehow led to yelling and cursing, and then you were running out into the streets alone, crying. And now, to this silence. It felt like hours before Jungwon spoke up.

“I’m sorry.”

Gulping, you forced the words out of your throat too. “I’m sorry too. I should’ve stayed instead of just running away like that.”

He shook his head. “No, this was my fault. I shouldn’t have yelled at you...talked to you in that way.”

You sighed. “Well, let’s just say it’s both of our faults, then. It doesn’t matter.”

Jungwon nodded hesitantly, peering up at you. “Should we go back to the dorms?”

You bit your bottom lip, thinking. Everything felt too much, like a fragile heart broken into a million pieces, each one jagged and misshapen. “I already texted my friend that I’ll stay over at their house tonight. Should we—should we just take a break, Jungwon? These days we’ve just been arguing and fighting with each other, I don’t know how we can continue this, if we can even—”

Your voice cracked, and the whirlpool of tears finally broke free as you sobbed, face in your hands. Your body tenses as you feel Jungwon’s arms wrap around you, relaxing slightly as he patted your back, trying to soothe your sorrows.

“Y/N, do you remember when we first met?”

He was working part-time at a restaurant as a waiter, and you thought he was pretty cute. You found that he was going to the same school as you, and the two of you became best friends. You fell for him a few months later, and ever since then, he was always by your side. Until everything fell apart a few weeks ago, when your tempers ran short and tension climbed high.

“I thought you were so beautiful...and remember our promise? I swore I was going to stay with you, that we won’t make the same mistake as your parents. You are the best thing that’s ever been mine. I know it’s hard to be together right now, when both of us are so busy that we don't have time with each other anymore...but I’ll always have time for you, Y/N. I know this sounds cheesy and all, but I just want to say that I love you and I don’t want to let you go.”

Sniffing, this time the tears flow because of his words. Turning around, you gave him a cheeky grin as you wiped your face. “Didn’t know you were such a romantic, Jungwon.”

His cheeks turned a shade of pink, and he shyly held out his hand. You took it, and the two of you started walking back home.

Niki - Jump Then Fall ; childhood love

Never mind, I’m going home tonight.

You raised your eyebrows at your friend’s message. Probably some couple problems with Jungwon. You were about to text back a reply, before you felt your pants get splashed with water.

You lifted your eyes to the sky, exasperated because you already know who did it. Sometimes I wonder how I even have a crush on him. I waited for him after dance practice and this is what I get? Turning around, you faced your friend, or as you like to call him, your greatest enemy, Nishimura Riki.

He has his usual mischievous grin on his face, jumping from foot to foot as he kicks at another puddle. Thankfully, you jumped out of the way just in time. Narrowing your eyes playfully, you said, “I see how it is...this is war.”

The rain had left numerous puddles on the sidewalk (probably due to the potholes your school refused to spend their money to fix), and you chased Niki down the street, splashing him with water. He laughed loudly and reached up (dangit, why is he so tall?), grabbed one of the branches of a tree, shaking the water from it. Gasping, your eyes widened as you got drenched from the drops. You glared at him, only causing his smile to stretch even wider from ear to ear. “I won,” Niki announced triumphantly.

You pouted, rolling your eyes. “Oh, fine. But it’s not fair, how did you even get this tall?”

Niki shrugged, as if it was no big deal, though you want to wipe the smug grin off his face. “I grew 13 centimeters last year.”

“Impossible,” you huffed. He shoved his hands in his pockets, raising his eyebrows at you as if challenging your statement. Shrugging his dance bag over one shoulder, Niki started walking, and you followed. “You just want to brag about your height.”

“Maybe I do, maybe I don’t,” Niki teased in a sing-song voice. “Either way, I’m still taller than you~”

You smiled grudgingly, stealing a look at him from the corner of your eye. It seems like yesterday when you both were kids, and he was this bouncy little boy who loved to annoy the hell out of you. He still does, but you felt a twinge of nostalgia as you see how tall and mature he had come, and even more good-looking as well. If only he knows how much I like him.

Sensing your stare, Niki wiggled his eyebrows at you, making you laugh at his expression. “What are you looking at?”

“Nothing,” you turned away, embarrassed. You really need to be less obvious, though Niki’s too oblivious to know anything about your feelings for him. 

“No, it’s something,” he leaned closer to you, and suddenly you forgot how to breathe properly. “Is there something on my face?”

You shook your head quickly, gaze wandering anywhere but his eyes. Spying a puddle in the corner of your vision, an idea flashed through your mind. Leaning closer, so that your faces were only inches apart, you noticed that Niki’s cheeks were blushing pink at the close distance. Maybe this isn’t so one-sided after all.

“Actually, there is something.” 

“W-what?” You expected him to pull away, but his eyes were dreamy, getting lost in your own. Or maybe you were the one getting lost in his. Tearing your gaze away, you grabbed his hand and dragged him towards the biggest puddle near the curb of the street. Taking a deep breath, you jumped straight into it, causing a huge splash that doused both you and Niki in water. You wished you could capture this moment on camera: Niki’s flustered face when you took his hand, his eyes widening comically as water sprayed his clothes. You laughed out loud, smirking at him. “I won,” you said, mimicking his voice from earlier. 

Your smile faded when Niki didn’t say anything back, the shocked expression still on his face. Confused, you asked, “what’s wrong?”

Clearing his throat, he motioned his head towards your intertwined hands. “Um, you’re still holding onto my hand.”

Maybe it’s cliche, two childhood friends falling for each other, but what’s wrong with cliches? You tightened your grip on his hand, grinning as his face flared red. “Is there something wrong with it?”

“Nothing,” he looked down, making you giggle. Oh, how the tables have turned. You took a step closer. 

“No, it’s something.”

He glanced up at you, unable to conceal a shy smile. You loved the way his hair falls in his face, slightly damp from jumping into too many puddles.

And all I can say is come closer, take a deep breath and jump then fall into me.

Daniel - Fifteen ; platonic love

“When are they going to confess already?” you snickered, eyeing the two teens playing in the puddles. Daniel followed your stare, shrugging at your words.

“When they finally get in through their heads that their feelings are mutual,” Daniel said. “Who knows how long that’ll take.”

You fold your arms across your chest, turning away and gazing wistfully into the distance. “Maybe one day I’ll find love like that.”

Daniel raised an eyebrow at you. “You got time, you’re still fifteen after all.”

Your hands dropped, and you sighed as your shoulders sagged. “I can’t believe I’m fifteen already...high school is so hard.” 

Daniel laughed at the whine in your voice, reaching over to ruffle your hair. You pushed his hand away, glaring at him. “Hey, don’t laugh. You didn’t get any of the difficult classes this year.”

“That’s because I already know I want to major in art so...there’s no need to take these classes anyway.”

You stopped and turned to him, narrowing your eyes. “What in art, specifically?”

Daniel's eyes flickered to yours, looking away in embarrassment. “Oh, just something in music.”

You grinned slyly, probing further. “What in music, exactly?”

Daniel gulped, hoping you wouldn’t laugh at him this time. “Um...well, I really want to become a rapper…”

Your eyes widened and you gasped. “A rapper? Daniel, that’s amazing!”

Your friend blinked in confusion, surprised at your excitement. “You-you think so?”

Nodding fervently, you started walking again. Around you, the streetlights flared to life. “Yeah, I mean, you seem pretty passionate about it. I remembered how the teacher caught you writing lyrics in the back of the textbook when you’re supposed to be paying attention during class.”

Daniel humphed, his long strides quickly catching up with yours. “Hey, math is boring, alright? You weren’t listening either.”

You decided to concede with him on that point, because math, indeed, is a pain in the ass (also because you were afraid he’ll stop letting you copy his homework right before class). “Fine, but I’m just saying that you shouldn’t be ashamed of your dream. You’re dedicated, I know you can do it.”

Daniel smiled shyly at your words. “Thanks, Y/N.”

You smiled back half-heartedly. “And here I am, with nothing planned out. I still don’t know who I want to be, or even who I am.”

“It’s fine if you haven’t figured yourself out yet, just go with the flow and do things that make you feel happy. Then you’ll discover where your interests and dreams lie,” Daniel said sagely, making your eyes roll at his tone. He bumped your shoulder with his. “I’ll always be here for you, yeah?”

“Thanks, but I just...you know how you’re at that time in your life, when you’re just questioning everything? Like, what is the meaning of life? Why am I here?”

“Just to suffer,” Daniel whispered, flinching away as you whacked him on the arm. “Ok, ok, I didn’t know you were going to get this deep.”

“Maybe I should be an English teacher then,” you said thoughtfully. “Make all the students analyze the meaning of the universe, like how Mr. Kim is forcing us to analyze Romeo and Juliet.”

“Romeo and Juliet…” Daniel stopped suddenly, making you bump into him. “Oh no...I forgot my copy of the book at school!”

You gave him a look. “Seriously? I told you to get it out of your locker!”

Daniel scuffed his shoe on the sidewalk, avoiding your gaze. “Well, you know how loud and chaotic the dismissal was...I couldn’t hear you.”

You shook your head in resignation. “Whatever, I’ll just send you pictures of the pages we have to read.”

Daniel’s head shot up, eyes staring hopefully at you. “Really? Y/N, thank you so much, you know you're my best friend right?”

You rolled your eyes. “Just make sure to remember it next time, or you’re on your own.”

(Jokes on you, Daniel knows you’ll grudgingly share your book with him for the rest of the year if he keeps forgetting it).

Sunghoon - Love Story ; forbidden love

“Sunghoon!” you whisper-shouted, grimacing as your boyfriend stepped on a stick. The sound seemed too loud in the quiet darkness, and you looked around wildly. Grabbing his arm, you dragged him behind a rock, lips pursed in a tense line. Heart pounding, you felt both worried and exhilarated at the same time. 

“Sorry,” Sunghoon said sheepishly, scratching the nape of his neck. “Didn’t see that.”

You frowned at him, turning around. “And I thought princes have stealth training as part of their schooling.”

Sunghoon scoffed. “All they teach us is how to look buff and strong so we can pick fights with your family.”

Stifling a laugh, you took his arm again, pulling him along. “True true, that sounds a lot like what they teach Youngbin too...though Youngbin isn’t the fighting type.”

“Your brother’s too soft,” Sunghoon muttered, “I feel sorry for him sometimes...he’d rather be kind than argue.”

Your lips quirked up in a sad smile. “Yeah, but there’s not much we can do about the feud, right?”

Nodding, Sunghoon carefully stepped over a pile of leaves, hand clutching tight onto yours. As the two of you cautiously stepped around the bend in the country road, Sunghoon let out a light gasp seeing what lay ahead. You grinned at his expression, quickening your pace until you two stopped in front of an enormous garden. Its gates were made up of interlocking flowers and vines, a sweeping archway of overhanging branches from two willow trees, and an open field lined with flowers of every kind laid beyond. Pushing away the branches, Sunghoon watched as you unraveled the flower gate and stepped into the beautiful utopia.

“A secret garden,” Sunghoon commented in awe. “How…”

“Youngbin and I used to go here all the time, whenever our families fight,” you answered. “Now that he’s confined to the training field, I feel too lonely being here all by myself.”

“Are you sure Youngbin wouldn’t mind?” Sunghoon asked, not wanting to intrude in sibling affairs.

You cast a funny look at him. “No, I’m sure he won’t. Besides...you’re the person I’m closest to besides him.”

The comment made Sunghoon blush, and he followed you down the path. On each side of him bloomed hundreds of colorful blossoms, making Sunghoon wonder who lived here long ago to tend to them all. Marigolds, roses, lilies, fuchsias, tulips, flowers of every kind decorated the leaves and vines. He reached out to pluck a red rose from the fray, careful not to prick his fingers. Stopping every now and then to admire the flowers, you tugged him towards the open field. Sitting down on the grass, you leaned your head against his shoulder.

“Look, the sun is rising.”

And indeed it was. Sunghoon smiled as you two relaxed in silence, watching the sunlight streak over the horizon in different shades of pink, yellow, and orange. A new day, a new beginning, he thought. He turned when he felt something being placed on his head, only to meet your grinning face as you adjusted the flower crown in his hair. 

“There,” you said, pushing a stray hair away from his eye. Leaning back proudly, you nodded at how the wreath of white daisies complemented his raven hair. “You look pretty, flower boy.”

Sunghoon took the red rose, breaking off the stem, tucked it behind your ear. “No, you’re prettier.”

“Whatever,” you said, though Sunghoon saw that you were trying hard not to smile. “Do you know what this reminds me of?”

“What?” Sunghoon asked, laying back onto the grass. He took the flower crown off and held it up to the sky, scrutinizing your handiwork. You mirrored his movement, turning on your side to face him.

“There’s this story I read in the library a few days ago, about how two young lovers woke up at dawn so they could watch the sunrise together.”

“Oh?” Raising an eyebrow, Sunghoon motioned for you to continue.

“Mhm,” You gazed off into the distance, a thoughtful look on your face. The sunbeams have gotten brighter, and they cast a glow on your face that Sunghoon couldn’t describe, other than ethereal. “It reminded me of us.”

“Who knows,” Sunghoon shrugged. “Maybe someday someone will write a story about us too.”

“A forbidden love story?” You snickered. “Who would write something like that?”

—— —— —— —— —— —— —— —— —— —— ——

~ Which story is your favorite? ~

[nahoyaglock]

WHEN I STOP BREATHING..

pairings! ushijima x reader

summary! sitting on the beach, so close to each other they can hear each other’s heartbeats. They both smile and they watch the world end right in front of them, reminiscing on all they’ve been through together. Why does the end of the world look so beautiful?

genre! angst

word count! didnt bother actually counting so ill estimate maybe 2000+

warnings! end of the world, death, murder mention, slight ooc ushijima idk its the end of the world so pff

a/n! uh idk i wanna hurt people, sorry if this is bad i havent written in a while :p i feel like the beginning was really good, the middle was ass and the end was okay but hoh im happy enough w this. I also cried writing this ngl lmaoo also did not fix any errors so my bad

You knew it was coming, you both did. New reports, articles, it was trending on all social media platforms. It was unavoidable, what could you do but waste away your last few days, watching old shows you watched as a kid, harsh knocks and cries from your doors from friends and family. You couldnt face them, you just wanted to drown out the thought of what was coming the next few hours of the day.

You had woken up and sluggishly dragged yourself from the comfort of your bed to your dirty kitchen, littered with dirty dishes and some uneaten food that youd try to make, but didn't have the stomach to eat. Your phone rang atleast every hour or two, many unanswered calls and long voicemails you couldnt bother to listen to.

There was a knock on your door, and you sighed, not wanting to bother with facing the person at the door. You turned on your heels, about to head to your room when you heard the voice call out to you.

"y/n."

Out of all the people why did it have to be him. You bit your lip and let out shaky breaths. You took another step, freezing at another set of knocks. The last persom you wanted to see was your boyfriend.

"y/n let me in or ill tear this door down." His voice was stern, laced with seriousness and slight concern. You wanted to open it, let him in and crumble into his arms, but it hurt so bad.

"Go away." You spoke, loud enough to be heard through the door, but not loud enough to be a yell.

"y/n."

You hesitantly walked to the door, unlocking the bottom lock, the top lock remaining unlocked, too bothersome for you to have delt with anyways. At the sound of the click of the locks he opened the door with quick motions, while also being careful not to knock you over.

At the sight of his big frame you felt like the world had just stabbed you through the chest 28 times. You backed up with quick steps are your boyfriend reached out to hug you, scared that his touch would break down your facade. You tripped over your own feet, landing hard on your butt.

"Ush.. Ushijima," you started, not knowing exactly what you were trying to say, "Please dont touch me."

His heart sank when he saw you, lifeless and so frail. He guessed you havent been getting much sleep- or maybe too much sleep, and not eating as he took a quick glance towards the food littered kitchen counter.

It wasnt any better for you, seeing your normally cold and calm boyfriend with a worried expression and eye bags that made it obvious he hasnt got much sleep either.

You pull yourself up, your eyes boring through your boyfriends abdomen as you bit your lip, trying to think of what to say, and to also keep yourself from falling apart. "What do you want?"

"y/n. Dont be cold to me." It wasnt a question, but it wasnt a demand. "Sorry," you mumbled, leaving you two in silence for a while.

"Ushi, you should go home," you said, feeling your heart race, every second you spent in his presence, under his gaze, killed you. "You should call Tendou or something."

"Toshi." He said, making your head shoot up, looking him in his eyes, seeing a tear roll down his cheek, his face remaining mostly emotionless, fear slightly present in his eyes. "Please keep calling me Toshi."

You felt a pang in your heart, suddenly the reality of things hitting you. You were the only one going through this, you knew this but never gave it more than a mere thought. He was scared, he didnt know what he was doing, he just knew to find comfort in you, like youve told him to for many years into your relationship.

"Toshi," you breathed, reaching up to wipe the tear from his cheek, "Toshi lets go somewhere."

You never felt the need to go outside, wanting to be isolated, but being here with your boyfriend, you felt like running away, wanting to escape from the dark pit of your home. "Lets go to the beach"

"y/n–"

"Lets go. Lets go, right.. right now Toshi," you felt as if though youve felt shoked by lightning, like you suddenly got hit with some sugar rush.

"We dont have time–"

"We do Toshi, we do, we do," you saw the corner of his lips raise up into a small smile. He hated seeing you like this but he was glad you were more alive than you were minutes before. You knew this, what he was thinking, and you knew his smile had so much sadness behind it, "we have time, lets go, lets go!"

You grabbed his hand and dragged him out of your apartment, not bothering to change from your days out clothing or close the door behind you. It wouldnt matter in another hour anyways.

The ride there was mostly silent, songs playing quietly on the radio. You watched as you passed through the town, the streets were slightly empty, stores looked run down, some stores even tore up and empty.

"Has it been like this since.. since the announcement?" You mumbled, earning a hum for Ushijima.

"Yeah, yeah it has." He knew that you didnt go out, and he was slightly grateful for it. The world went to shit after the announcement, many lootings, murders and other various crimes being commited.

"Im glad your safe Toshi," you spoke into your palm.

"Im glad your safe too."

The ride went on in silence until you got to the beach. You both climbed out of the car, the beautiful blue sea sparkling under the sunny sky. It was funny how such a depressing day could look so so beautiful.

"Hmm, this is the beach we went to with the team our senior year, remember?" He asked and turned to face you. The fear in his eyes was much more evident in the light, along with signs of personal neglict. He hasnt been taking good care of himself either.

You walk around the front of the car to grab his hand, your small hands tracing light circles on his rough palms before linking your hands together, giving him a comforting squeeze. "I remember."

He let out a shaky breath he didnt know he was holding in, and you two found a nice spot on the beach to sit and watch the sky. "Toshi, do you remember the time goshiki got gummy bears stuck in his nose?"

He looked at you, and his face softened, "yeah. Yeah i do." He let out a small chuckle at the thought of his old teammates. "Do you remember when Tendou took my water bottle and filled it with really sour lemonade?" He asked, you could hear his voice unravel into a more comfortable tone, instead of one holding in so much hurt and fear.

"Ha, i actually helped him with that you know?" You spoke up, a small grin on your lips as your boyfriend grabbed your waist, pulling you closer to him. "We'll its okay, because it was 2 years ago."

It had been 2 years. 2 years since you had become shiratorizawas manager, 2 years since you made the number 1 ace fall head over heels for you, 2 years since you had went on your first date with him.

"2 years, its been so long." You laid your head on Ushijimas arm, feeling tired. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders and placed a kiss atop your head.

"Thats when we first started dating," you spoke, shoulders shaking with a small laugh, "i would've never imagined to have the nations number 1 ace fall so madly in love with me." You laughed and turned to your boyfriend to continue your teasing, but stopped when you saw him looking back at you.

He couldn't respond with anything more than a mere chuckle, tears now streaming down his cheeks. You bit your lip, scooting closer to him so you were in his lap, wrapping your arms around his large stature.

"Toshi, I love you." It was no more than a whisper and he placed a warm, loving kiss to your temple, rubbing your back softly as he let out a shaky laugh.

"y/n god, you make it so hard not to cry." He whispered in an unstable tone, resting his head atop yours. "I love you too."

This was how it was, clinging to the other and sharing old tales of your days spent with Ushijima and the boys, tales of times tendou had snuck out of the dorms and got caught by washijou, or when goshiki cut his bangs too short, or how Ushijima brought your parents a half eaten watermelon as a gift.

Those last moments spent with laughs and tears, kisses and hugs, warmth and comfort, those were your best memories. Despite the fate to cross you, Ushijima and everyone else in the world, you felt like you could smile for the first time.

You would smile alot, but it felt different this time. You convinced yourself that it was just because you had been withering away for the past days, but you knew it was because you felt free.

You had no worries in the moment with your lover, you didnt need to think about getting up for work the next day, or how you would afford next months rent. You felt like the largest weight had been lifted off of you, and you could really smile for the first time.

There was a slightly rumble if the ground that had made you and Ushijima go silent. You pulled away from your spot in the crook of his neck to look at him, fear still in his eyes.

"I dont wanna die," he chuckled out, "but im not sad." He drew small shapes into your hips with his thumbs, looking onto your laps instead of your face, and you just stared at him.

His usually stoic face was calmed, relaxed, his jaw unclenched and his eyes soft. You hadnt seen so many emotions from your boyfriend so much, it was almost scary. But he looked so gorgeous, he was your world.

"Wakatoshi Ushijima, you know," your placed your hands on both sides of his face, "it doesnt matter what happens to this world, because," you placed a passionate kiss to his lips, the tears finally falling from your eyes, "you, you're my world Toshi."

He let out a noise that was similar to a choke, tears rolling down the apple of his cheeks as he placed his forehead to yours, letting his shoulders shake with hard sobs. Loud crashes, screams and car alarms had let you know it was coming, the end of the world.

The last thing you saw was Ushijima, smiling snd crying, mouthing out one last 'I love you'.

Why does the end of the world look so beautiful?

© tomura-heart — all rights reserved. reposting, modifying, or copying is not allowed. do not translate. do not read my writing as asmr. do not plagiarize.

[lulu-zodiac]

Title: Peppermint

Pairing: Castiel/Dean Winchester

Tags: Fluff, Pining, First Kiss

Summary: Dean shares a Christmas tradition with Cas.

If you want to be added to my fic tag list, let me know! <3

.

There’s a little red tin in the glove compartment of the impala, and when Cas picks it up, he can feel the way it’s scratched and dented with age.

“What’s this?”

Dean glances over, and something unreadable passes across his face. It reminds Cas of how he looks when Sam talks about their childhood, nostalgic and complicated – not happiness, but something close. “Where’d you find that?”

“It was just in here with your Dad’s old phone, under the map,” Cas replies, turning it over interestedly in his hands. There’s a faded image on the front he can’t quite make out, worn green and silver and gold. The colours of Dean’s eyes, as he looks at Cas in the half-light of the unfolding road. “What is it?”

“It used to have peppermints in it,” Dean says, looking back to the road. There’s a wistful kind of sadness in his gaze, but a slight smile playing across his mouth. “Sammy begged Dad to buy it at some gas station when he was, I don’t know, maybe four. He didn’t even like peppermints, he just liked the Christmas tree on the front of the tin, wouldn’t shut up about it. It was filled with those red and white striped candy canes, you know the ones?”

Cas nods, watches the moving December colours play across Dean’s features.

“Well, that year we were stuck in here all Christmas day while Dad was wrapping up a hunt. Sammy was old enough to know it was Christmas, so it kind of sucked. But I got Sammy singing Christmas songs and we drew stupid snowmen cartoons on the windows, and it was okay, we passed the time. Dad was gone so long we ended up eating most of the candy canes while we were waiting, but Sammy insisted on saving the last one for Dad. He still hero-worshipped Dad at that point, even though Dad was barely a father to him – was barely even there, to see Sammy growing up” Dean breaks off momentarily, shakes his head like he’s trying to surface from deep water. Cas notes the set of Dean’s jaw, the way his knuckles are white around the wheel, resists the urge to reach out, soften them.

“Sam knows how much you did now, Dean,” he says, instead, into the quiet.

Dean makes a dismissive sound, carries on as though Cas hasn’t spoken at all, but the tension in his hands is less strained; “Anyway, when Dad finally came back that night he was only a little beat up, in a good mood for once. He tried to take us for some real food, but everywhere was closed by that time so we just sat in here together and Dad broke the last candy cane into three for us to share,” Dean glances at the box Cas is still holding. It feels warm in Cas’s hands now, the mental heating up in his palms as he listens to the story, as though it’s slowly coming alive. “It was one of the better Christmases, actually. Dad refilled the box with them each December, handed them out to me and Sammy when we’d been driving all night. It was one of the few traditions we ever had,” he shrugs, adjusts his grip self-consciously on the wheel, “Stupid, really,” he adds, in that way he has of diminishing anything personal he says, “It’s probably empty now.”

Obligingly, Cas opens the box. It is empty, save a couple of crumpled silver wrappers, but it smells of ghostly peppermint. Cas sniffs, imagines little Dean and Sam sitting in the impala alone on Christmas day. His chest aches at the thought of Dean trying to distract Sam, keep him happy and amused while Dean was probably afraid. “I’ve never tried peppermint,” he tells Dean, inhaling again and trying to figure out the scent. It’s sharp, clean, a little powdery. Like dusty snow. “What’s it like?” he asks, curiously.

“Hard to describe to anyone who hasn’t tasted it,” Dean says, “Like most things. It’s – sweet. Kind of makes the inside of your mouth feel cold when you inhale.”

Cas looks at him, watches the lights of the road reflect in his green gaze.

“Hey, we can get some, if you want,” Dean says, nodding towards the road, “There’s a gas station just up ahead, I wouldn’t mind stopping to stretch my legs anyway.”

“I would like that,” Cas smiles at the thought of getting to taste a little piece of Dean’s history, watches as the lights get brighter and the car slows, pulling into the empty gas station.

Outside, it’s cold, the dark biting at Cas’s skin as he waits for Dean to return from the kiosk. He leans against the cool, smooth metal of the impala, stares skywards for a while. It’s cloudy, the sky is swollen with snow. Cas likes not being able to see the heavens, sometimes. On days like this, earth is full enough of wonder all by itself. The greasy spill of gas station lights on frozen concrete, a little metal box of memories in his pocket, Dean’s footsteps echoing through the quiet towards him. The lights of heaven could never compare.

“Here,” Dean’s nose is pink from the cold, eyes bright as he leans back against the car beside Cas, hands him a paper packet. “Peppermint candy canes. Go on, knock yourself out.” He sticks his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket and stares up at the sky, like Cas had been moments before. Cas wonders whether Dean is comforted by the blankness too, or if he aches for the far-distant twinkling lights and their warmth, so long absent from his own life.

“Will you have one too?” Cas asks, peering into the bag and tentatively drawing out one of the striped candies before handing it back to Dean.

“Why not?” Dean’s fingers are warm against Cas’s for a moment, rough with calluses, and then there’s nothing again. He pulls out a candy and stuffs the paper bag into his pocket, begins unwrapping the little umbrella-shaped stick. “I can’t remember the last time I had one of these, you know. Probably the Christmas before Sam went off to college.” He puts the candy between his lips, sucks. Cas suddenly has to catch his breath, cold and startling in his lungs. “Hey, what are you waiting for?” Dean is looking at Cas, lips red and plump around the candy, eyes bright in the cold air.

“Oh,” Cas looks down at his own untouched candy, brings it up to his mouth and sucks experimentally. “It’s like… toothpaste,” he frowns at Dean, letting the cool, clean taste fill his mouth. He sucks again, slower, trying to get a sense of the flavour. “It’s quite nice.”

Dean’s cheeks are pink with the cold now too. “Uh – yeah, it is, I guess.” He’s looking at Cas intently in the muted lights of the deserted gas station, with an expression that is familiar yet unreadable and makes Cas feel warm even in the cold.

“This is what Christmas tasted like to you?” Cas sucks the candy again, looks at Dean.

“Once, I suppose so,” Dean sounds distracted, but his tone doesn’t match the intent focus in his gaze as he looks at Cas. The cold has made his cheeks flush darker still, and the light is muted enough that only an arc of green is visible around the black of his pupils.

“It does make my mouth feel cold,” Cas observes, with interest. He sucks the candy further into his mouth and pulls it out with a pop, feeling the cool cleanness of the air being pulled between his lips. Dean clears his throat slightly. “I haven’t encountered any other food that has this effect,” Cas licks slowly at the tip of the candy, and is aware of Dean inhaling sharply, “Do you know what causes it?”

“I don’t,” Dean’s voice is slightly hoarser than usual.

“Very interesting,” Cas contemplates, licking the tip of the candy again with a swirl of his tongue. Dean makes a stifled sound, and Cas looks up with a frown. “Don’t you want yours?” he asks, eyeing Dean’s uneaten candy, “Or do you only enjoy them when you can eat them with Sam? I’m sorry, I know I can’t provide that part of the tradition for you.”

“Sam isn’t the only person I can have good memories with, Cas. This can be a new tradition, okay?” Dean says, and he’s glowing, so beautiful here in the cold all lit up. “But,” he pauses, swallowing, “You’re right, I’m not sure I want mine.”

“You don’t?” Cas frowns, worriedly. He pulls his own candy away from his mouth.

The colour is high on Dean’s cheeks as he shakes his head, “No. I think I’d rather have yours, actually.” And before Cas can say anything, Dean’s lips are suddenly on his, soft and warm, so warm in the cold air. Cas feels as though he’s been holding his breath for years and is suddenly able to breathe. It’s wonderful, the heat of Dean’s mouth against his, the slick of his tongue twining with Cas’s, tasting of peppermint and making something hot curl deep in Cas’s stomach. His hands are cupping Cas’s face, rough skin, tender touch. Cas is breathing hard when Dean pulls back, both of their breath clouding the December air between them. “Tastes better on you,” Dean grins, and it’s a beautiful thing, tentative and free here in the cold without heaven watching.

Cas reaches out and grabs the lapels of Dean’s leather jacket, pulls him in again. This time it’s harder, urgent, Dean’s breath coming in stifled gasps into Cas’s mouth as Cas presses him back against the impala, sinks into the heat of Dean’s mouth, the warm, hard line of Dean’s body, pliant under him. He can taste the desperation on Dean’s tongue along with the peppermint, and he chases it, deepening the kiss until Dean is groaning against him, clutching at Cas’s coat. Cas thinks he might be making noises too, but he can’t think about anything except Dean, here at last in all the ways he should be, warm and real. Oblivion.

In his coat pocket, he can feel the outline of the little peppermint tin where their heartbeats edge closer to each other. He smiles against Dean’s mouth, loves that he’ll never be able to taste peppermint without remembering this; the shine of Dean’s eyes in the muted December lights, the heat of their bodies pressed together, the sky frozen and empty overhead, a blank canvas for their own stars.

[chokemeanakin]

idk if you do like song request sorta things, but could you do a fic based on the song "night bus" by gabrielle alpin? especially the "suddenly i know that i'm on my way home to you for the last time" part--maybe an angsty sort of thing where the reader and anakin's relationship gets discovered and she gets sent away or smth? idk i couldn't stop thinking ab it last night and i have no motivation to write it myself and i love your writing so maybe?? tysm!

Oh sis this was so much fun to write. Even though it is sad... idk i liked getting in the feels. Anyway I hope it meets your expectations. If it didn’t, well, pls write it yourself and tag me! I’d love to see what your vision was ❤️🤗

Masterlist

Read it on ao3

WC: 1.8k

Night Bus - Anakin x gn Reader angst

You swore this would never be you. You promised yourself it would last. If two people love each other, there should be no reason you couldn’t be together.

That’s childish thinking, you tugged your jacket tighter around you. Your boots dragged through the grey sludge of the sidewalk, remnants from a lazy downpour of wet snow a few hours before. Your mind whirled and stomach churned as the streetlights began blinking on one by one, the markets closing up for the night. 

It should have been a peaceful thing, but you felt sick. With each step closer to your destination, you felt as though a current was dragging you back, the darkness closing in around you. You knew as soon as you reached him, it would be for the last time. Your fairytale would come to an end, and as you walked through the bitter streets of Coruscant on your way to the Jedi temple, you prepared yourself to say goodbye to your prince charming. 

“It’s selfish, what you’re doing,” Master Windu had hissed at you. You were still reeling from his admittance that he knew about your and Anakin’s relationship. You had been so careful to keep it a secret, you had no idea how he found out. 

“Obi-Wan told you,” your lips felt like rubber.

“He did not,” Mace leveled his gaze at you. “He knows, I’m sure of it. But he respects Anakin too much to give him away like that. A flaw on his part, which will be dealt with later.”

Your head was swimming. What did this mean for you? For Anakin? For the both of you together? Obviously you knew what was next, but your mind couldn’t wrap around it, couldn’t accept it.

“You need to let him go,” Mace declared, not a hint of mercy detected. 

“I can’t.”

“Then he needs to let you go.”

“He won’t.”

“Then you will be the fall of the Jedi!” His sudden outburst made you flinch. Your heart beat fast, blood swishing in your ears. His body was still as a statue, but his eyes were wide and his chest was heaving with an anger that was barely under control. Master Windu was of the more… pessimistic Jedi, but you had never really seen him lose control so completely. Now, you could see he was overwhelmingly stressed. No, not stressed-- panicked. 

“He needs me,” you replied shakily, unwilling to stand down. Anakin had made it clear over and over again that if you just said the word, he would leave the Order for you. The only reason he was still here was because you wouldn’t let him abandon his purpose for you. Windu may think you would be the downfall of the Jedi, but you were the reason it hadn’t completely fallen yet.

“You’re a poison to him.”

It looked like neither of you would be backing down. Windu saw this, and took a deep breath. He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. When he opened them, he strolled to his seat, and then motioned for you to take the one beside him.

“Let me explain myself,” his voice was much calmer now, but the hard look in his eyes remained. “Anakin is important. Not just to the Jedi, but to the balance of life itself.”

“He never asked for any of that.”

“But he still is,” Windu argued. “There’s no changing that fact. He is powerful. He has potential. And he’s unstable. He was before he met you, and he is now-- even more so.”

“Because of me?”

“Because of how he feels about you.”

You clenched your fists and glared at Windu. “How could being in love ever be a bad thing?”

“Love is an attachment. When one is attached to something, it can be taken away. When it is taken away, it breeds anger and hate and resentment, a path to the dar--”

“Oh, spare me the lecture,” you spit. “I know of your Jedi laws and morals. Now tell me why our love is so forbidden if all it’s bringing him is happiness and peace?”

“For now. It’s happiness and peace for now, because it’s new. I should have stepped in sooner, should have stopped it before it was too late. But with the start of the war, I lost sight of it, got too distracted…” Windu shook his head. “If you end it now, he’ll be able to move on. The damage won’t be permanent.”

“I don’t understand,” your chest stung. 

“He loves you. Any Jedi can sense that. And you love him, too.” You couldn’t meet Windu’s gaze. “If something happens to you, and you are taken away from him, or-- Force forbid-- you die, it will break him. He will be consumed by anger and hatred and he will fall to the dark side. His emotions are strong, far too strong to be handled easily. If Anakin goes to the darkside, the Jedi will be no match for the Sith. We will perish, and the war will be lost, and so will any semblance of peace that exists in this life.”

Mace’s tone softened as he saw the tears build up in your eyes. “This path is inevitable, and it needs to be prevented. The only way we can be sure is to remove you from his life. It was a mistake letting you two get so close, and the Council takes full responsibility. But now, you must let him go.”

“How certain are you,” you forced the words from your aching throat. “How certain are you of this future?”

“Yoda had a vision.”

Your breath left you like a balloon deflating. You were glad you were sitting now, because you didn’t think your legs could handle the weight as you felt your world crumble around you. Anakin’s smiling face flashed through your mind, and a tear trailed down your face.

“You have until sunrise to leave Coruscant,” Mace’s tone was back to authoritative, formal and commanding, leaving no room for argument. “You can never return. Not as long as Anakin is here. You may never come in contact with him ever again.”

“And who’s going to stop me if I do? Who’s going to stop him?”

“If you have any respect for every innocent living being in this galaxy, you will do what needs to be done. Now go. You have a job to do.”

You swore you could hear your heart drop and shatter to the ground in a million tiny pieces as you stood from that chair and walked out of the council room. You spent the day mulling over your conversation, crying, pacing, and pulling at your hair. You tried to think of anything you could do to be with Anakin-- pretend to leave him and be even more secretive, get a different identity so you could stay on Coruscant, run away together. You knew he would if you asked.

But deep down, you knew Windu was right. The Jedi needed Anakin, and you were his weakness. If Anakin left, or fell to the dark side because of you, it would be the end of the galaxy. Just because it wasn’t a possibility now, doesn’t mean it wasn’t one in the future. Yoda had a vision, after all, and the fear in Windu’s eyes told you it was serious. 

Now here you were, walking to Anakin’s place to spend one last night with him before you had to leave him. Forever. Your body ached from the cold, the grief, and from packing your belongings all afternoon. You could barely form words as you booked a ship off the planet for early next morning. Then, you had numbly pulled on your jacket and boots, and began your trek to Anakin one last time. 

Cars whizzed overhead, the honking distant in your hollow ears. You were shaking, but not from the cold, as you caught sight of the Jedi temple ahead. The entrance was only a few feet away. You just had to walk through the door, sneak down the hallway, and you’d be there. He’d open the door, offer you a blinding smile, pull you inside, and warm you up with a drink and a kiss. You would put something on the holonet like you always did, just for background noise, and lay down on the bed and just be together. Talk, or kiss, or hold each other. Feel his laugh vibrate through your body because he was pressed so close to you, watch his curls bounce as he shook his head, listen to the soft sounds of him sleeping. The moonlight always made him look like some sort of space prince as it glistened off his cheekbones, painting him in a pale blue. You would trace your fingertips along his face, and he would pretend to still be asleep as he smiled and kissed your fingertips. So happy, so at peace, so in love--

You stopped in your tracks.

I can’t do this.

The pain was building up again. You thought your heart had already shattered, but the ghost of it kept cracking. Something awful was breaking in your chest with each breath, each second, each step toward your goodbye. There was no way you could face him and be okay tonight. The tears were already making an appearance.

“You need to let him go,” Windu’s voice battled your sorrow. “You will be the fall of the Jedi.”

The breath you took was like swallowing razor blades as the cold air filled your lungs. Steadying yourself on the wall of the temple, you pushed your way past the entrance and entered the main hall. The familiar smell worsened your nausea, and you kept your hood up and head down as you walked the familiar path down the hall, taking the elevator up, and then crossing the last hallway before you found his door.

You schooled your features and shoved down the swirling tempest threatening to spill out of you. Once your hands stopped trembling, you brought a fist up and knocked on the door.

Anakin opened the door. He was smiling brilliantly, blue eyes sparkling in the light. The image of his face falling, eyes clouding over in confusion and hurt as he searched for you the next morning and found you gone flashed through your mind. You knew he would never stop searching for you. This is not what he would have wanted. But Mace was right-- he would heal, in time, and he could live the life he was supposed to live; as a Jedi, a General, and the Chosen One. 

“Anakin,” you forced yourself to smile. “Hi.”

His smile turned from charming to soft, hands immediately moving to pull you into his room for the last time. “You’re freezing, my love. Let’s get you warmed up, I already made you something to drink.”

[ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa]

Footprints in the Sand

Part 10: Start a War

Summary/Author's Note: TWO MONTHS. Two fucking months Oberyn was silent in my head and y’all suffered for it. I just knew everyone would stop caring about this fic because I let you all down but I posted that it was coming back and my inbox and DMs have been BLOWING UP all fucking night. I love you guys and I am very emotional. Enjoy. 

We had to have just a little drama but of course I would never keep our main three from going to Dorne. Oberyn knows perfectly well that there will be consequences to his actions--he does not care. We are officially in double digits people?? This is unreal. Also, please listen to this song to get the feeeeeeel of what’s going on. 

Pairing: Oberyn x Ellaria x Lannister!Reader Word Count: 4.1k Warnings/ratings: 18+/R - Distress, Sad!Oberyn (this was hard to write but I fixed it), murder, throat slashing, Oberyn is angry and reckless.

[Parts] [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9]  [MASTERLIST]

The waves crashed against the rocks with as much gentleness as was possible for the crags of King’s Landing. The air was cold, but the sky a crisp blue as the sun started to peak over the water. It was a good day for sailing, a good day for travel, and most importantly a good day for going home. Oberyn leaned on one of the posts on the boardwalk leading out into the waters as he watched his soldiers ready the ship. He held the slip of parchment in his fist, torn between crumpling it, re-reading it for the hundredth time, or throwing it into the ocean. 

‘I’m sorry. I can’t do this.’

Six words. After this week was that all they meant to you? The note was signed at the bottom with your name but he couldn’t believe it. His guts churned with the idea that what the three of you had shared in the brothel could be summed up in such a small note. He crushed it in his fist again and swallowed the lump in his throat as he tossed it into the sea. He watched it float down to the surface before getting swallowed by a wave and wished it was the sorrow he felt instead.

“My love?”

Oberyn looked over his shoulder as Ellaria came to stand behind him and put her hand on his sleeve, the other gripped his bicep as she bowed her head to kiss his shoulder. Her eyes were red and despite the stern, stoic way she held her body he knew she had spent most of the morning with silent tears rolling down her cheeks. She had put most of her energy into ignoring their existence, and he didn’t dare bring attention to them.

“I thought she’d come,” Oberyn said flatly as he looked back out onto the horizon.

“So did I,” she whispered against his cloak.

He knew it had been quick, a passion spurred on by spite and excitement, but he thought despite the amount of time, there was a certain kinship between you. The idea of not belonging in one place, of wanting to see what wonders the world held--they could give that to you. That and so much more. All it required of you was a leap of faith and yet you were choosing to stay with the Lannisters.

Looking back to the city, looming in the twilight of the morning, it was as if he was waiting for you to come running over the hill. If it was possible, he would stand here and wait as long as he had to.

"I vow to worship your body with my mouth, hands, and cock, every night once we're in Dorne." “Promise?”

He had made you that promise against that table in the library with his cock buried inside of you and you had called him your prince. Had it all been for nothing? Was it just a pretty sentiment said in the height of ecstasy? The thought made a twinge of pain blossom in his chest and he pushed it deep into the background of his subconscious. If you truly didn’t want to go to Dorne, if you didn’t want Ellaria, if you didn’t want..him--he wanted to hear it come from your own lips.

“It doesn’t make sense,” he rubbed his beard in thought. “Who did you say brought the note?”

“I don’t know,” Ellaria answered honestly. “Your men said the messenger was wearing Lannister colors.”

“Something doesn’t feel right,” Oberyn stood up straight and walked towards the plank ramp that was leading up to his ship. He stopped the captain of his guard with a gesture of his hand and the man stood at attention with his hand on his scimitar. “Change of plans.”

“But, my prince--” the man looked startled as he faced him. “We’re almost ready to set sail.”

“Then you’ll be ready when I return.” Oberyn held up his hand and stopped another of the guards from walking one of the horses up the ramp.

“Return?” Ellaria spoke up and turned Oberyn to face her instead. “What are you doing?”

“She didn’t write that, Ellaria--”  

“Oberyn--”

“Someone else did.”

“Listen to yourself--”

“My gut is never wrong. She’s in trouble--”

“Oberyn!” Ellaria grabbed both of his upper arms tightly, digging her fingers into the fabric of his yellow sleeves as she fought the urge to shake him. “I thought she would come, as well. I’m heartbroken that she--” She shook her head and swallowed hard. “That she doesn’t want us. But what are you going to do? Storm the Red Keep with a handful of men? And what if you’re wrong--what then?”

“I’m not wrong. And I don’t need a handful of men--I have me.” He gave her waist a squeeze in return and leaned forward to capture her lips and kiss her hard. It was brief, but it caught her off guard just enough to release her hold on him as he walked around her to the horse.

“Don’t do this,” Ellaria pleaded once she recovered, but it fell on deaf ears. Oberyn was many things, but with his fearlessness often came a stupidity that Ellaria knew was going to put her in an early grave.

“Captain,” Oberyn addressed the man from before as he undid his traveling cloak and tossed it to one of the other soldiers.

“Your grace?” The stoic man stood up straighter and gave a nod of attention.

“No one, except myself, is allowed on this ship. You are to stay with my paramour and keep her safe at all costs, do you understand?” Oberyn gave him a very serious gaze and the other man nodded.

“I’m coming with you,” Ellaria protested, but Oberyn shook his head as he grabbed the horn of the saddle and hoisted himself up onto the animal with a swing of his leg.

“No,” He said curtly, rubbing his hand along hers on his knee to soften the sting of his words. “You are correct in saying I will not be able to take the Keep by force. I’m going to go get her, and come back unseen--I need you ready to sail the moment our feet touch the deck.”

“This will have consequences.”

“Everything we do always does.”

She bit her lip and lowered her dark eyes at him. There was no arguing with him. He had clearly made up his mind. “Be careful.”

He grinned and gave her a nod. “I always am.”

“If that were true, I would worry less,” She said. He chuckled before clicking his tongue and spurring the horse forward back across the dock and back into the city.

--

It was early enough in the city square that barely anyone was in the streets. The shops and carts were still closed and the morning air was the cold, crisp kind that seemed to permeate one’s lungs and make them feel clean. The metal shoes of the horse clopped softly as Oberyn turned the reins and clicked his tongue again leading the animal down an alleyway.

The shadows swallowed him as he moved along the wall and pulled the animal up short, dismounting gracefully. He moved the reins up over the animal’s head and tied the leather straps to a beam that was protruding from the stone walls.

He knew the tower that held the servants quarters and the one that had held the bedchambers for the Lannisters when Elia had been queen. Ellaria would have skinned him alive if she had known that was what he was basing his entire plan off of--a memory of the castle layout that was the better part of a decade old.

He ran his hand along the damp stones of the wall that led down the alley and around the larger part of the tower. There were no guards to be seen, as they were no doubt guarding the doors, but he wasn’t looking for a door--he was looking for a window. He looked up, carefully pulling a bit of the mortar that held the stones in place from the wall and crumbled it between his fingers. Humming his approval, he pulled his dagger from the sheath on his side and reached up as high as he would and started digging one of the bricks loose.

He put his dagger away and grabbed the self-made foothold tightly before hoisting himself up to the metal sconce that held one of the Lannister banners on the side of the wall. With careful, meticulous planning, he found something to hold onto, one right after the other, up the side of the tower. A gap in the bricks, a stone that was slightly larger than the rest, it all served the same purpose. His arms and shoulders ached with the repeated motion of pulling his weight up but he pressed on.

He climbed to where the tower met one of the breezeways of the garden and used it as an opportunity to take a break and reassess. His boots dropped down on the roof of the apex of the tower and movement caught his eye. 

The window directly above him, where he was betting your bedroom was was open. But what was odd was the rope that was hanging down from it, blowing gently in the breeze. No, that wasn’t a rope, that was a long line of bed linens knotted together. The realization made him smirk as he searched the courtyard below for signs of movement.

“Clever woman,” he chuckled quietly to himself.

Staying low, he walked the spine of the roof along the perimeter of the courtyard until he got to the end and looked over into another dark alley. Whatever gods were looking down on him that day, were doing so favorably because just like he had hoped, there you were. You hugged the wall of the alley much like he had, sticking to the shadows as much as possible. Not only were you not wearing a dress, leather riding breeches took the place of lacy skirts, but your hair was tucked carefully under the dark hood of your cloak. To the average person walking by, you looked ordinary, easy to miss, unless someone was really looking.

He turned his back to the alley and gripped the edge of the roof, lowering his body down as far as it would go before releasing his grip. His boots made a firm thud on the cobblestone behind you and he moved swiftly, putting one arm around your waist and the other over your mouth. Just as he expected, you tried to scream against his hand but he was quick to speak against your hair.

“It’s me, it’s me--”

You turned in his arms and he loosened his grip enough to let you. The look of utter relief on your face was enough to make his chest tight. He grinned and tucked a strand of your hair back into the safety of your hood.

“Oberyn..”

He let out a grunt and braced his knees as you threw your arms around his neck and put your face against his shoulder. His arms wrapped tightly around your back and he dipped his head to kiss you softly.

“It’s alright. You’re alright,” he said, quietly.

"How did you know to come? I thought you were supposed to sail this morning before dawn. I was worried I would be too late."

“We are--but I knew something was wrong. I knew you didn’t send that note.” he rubbed his hands up and down your arms as if to keep you warm and convince himself that you were indeed real.

“What note?” You asked, a flash of fear crossing through your eyes followed quickly by realization. “Cersei--she said that she was going to send word to you and Ellaria that I had changed my mind.”

“She did,” he nodded. “But it wasn’t very convincing.” He winked and you gave a sigh of relief and hugged him again. "If you don't wish to go to Dorne, I expect to hear it from your own lips."

"No--" you blurted out and put your hand to your mouth, looking around the alleyway for any signs of another person. "No, I want to go--I want you, and Ellaria."

He smiled then and let his large hand cup the side of your face, allowing you to lean into his touch as he backed you up against the stone wall and kissed you deeply. "I was hoping that's what you would say." He whispered against your lips and you put your hands on his chest, gripping his tunic. He allowed himself to indulge for only a moment before he pulled back and said to the space between you, "We need to go. Ellaria is waiting and I fear the longer we wait, our odds of getting caught only increase."

You nodded quickly. "Cersei gave the order that if anyone wearing Martell colors came to the castle, they were to be killed on sight--especially you and Ellaria."

"Did she now? Well, that might make things interesting." He chuckled, but it held no joy, it was a noise of spiteful entertainment. "Come on," he grabbed your hand and walked ahead of you, keeping the majority of your body behind him.

The two of you hurried along the wall and you let Oberyn guide you down the alley and around the corner as he clearly retraced his steps. He stopped abruptly, almost causing you to collide with his back as he spotted his horse, now being inquisitively observed by two of the king's guard. They carefully untied the beast from its tether to the wall and looked at one another in confusion. Two against one? Those were favorable odds in his eyes.  

"Stay here," he said, planting you against the bricks with a firm hand on each of your arms.

"Oberyn--Obr--fuck." You tried to protest but he was already gone.

He moved like his nickname implied, swift and silent, like a snake in the sand. He grabbed the hilt of his dagger and pulled it from his belt, his hand wrapped securely around it as he reached the two guards. They never stood a chance as the prince grabbed the taller one by the back of the helmet, jerked his head backwards, and wrapped his arm around the front of him to run the blade across his throat in a dramatic display of red. The horse whinnied and reared back, taking a few steps away from the group of men.

“Stop!” The other guard yelled, as his comrade fell to his knees and then face down, unmoving on the stone.

The command didn’t do any of good, as Oberyn rushed him before he could pull his long sword. The Prince raised his knee and kickied the long sword from his hand with a clang. Oberyn used the momentum and slammed him up against the brick stones, the man tried to scream and he drove the blade of his dagger into his open mouth, through the back of his head, pinning him against the bricks. Your hand flew to your mouth, muffling an involuntary noise of shock as you watched the man’s body twitch, resembling a butterfly pinned to a board in a Maester’s laboratory.

Oberyn leaned in, gripping the man’s hair as blood poured down his chin and he fought his body’s urge to close his mouth around the blade. Any screams he may have made were strangled around the steel as he looked at his attacker with horrified eyes.

“You can keep the dagger,” Oberyn said quietly, close to the man’s face, as he traced his finger down the detailed snake on the hilt. “I want Jaime and the queen to know I was here.”

He looked back at you, expecting to see horror on your face, disgust, regret, anything that would have you second guessing your decision to go with him now that you had seen such a thing. But you were a Lannister, and when he extended his hand to you, you took it willingly. He pulled you behind him only dropping your hand long enough to hoist himself up onto the horse and reach back down to lift you up as well.

You put your hands in the mane of the animal as one of his arms came around the front of your body and held your back tightly against his chest. He dug the heels of his boots into the haunches of the horse and it bolted, thundering hooves against the stone. It was no longer about being quiet. It was about being quick, and putting as much distance between the you and King’s landing as possible.

The two of you rode hard and fast through the streets of the city. People waking up for the day and starting to open up their homes and shops looked at you with curious speculation but you moved too swiftly for much else. Oberyn’s arm was a comforting weight along your stomach and you put one of your hands over it, leaning back into his chest to ground yourself against the jerking of the horse as it galloped.

The minute the docks came into view you felt like you could breathe again. Your chest ached from the anticipation of being unable to see your destination but it was the image of Ellaria standing tall at the edge of the ship that made you want to burst into tears. She looked absolutely stunning, in her burnt orange robes, soft dark leather bodice and matching riding trousers. She was a siren on the water, and she was waiting to call both of you home.

“Sails!” She yelled, over her shoulder to the men behind her and Oberyn’s captain nodded in agreement before moving to make sure everyone within earshot followed her orders.

Your body jerked as Oberyn steered the stallion up the ramp to the ship and jumped it over the edge onto the deck with a loud thud. He let the animal slow to a trot as its chest heaved from the exertion and it blew loud breaths through its nostrils. He pulled up on the leather reins and came to a stop just as the ship shoved off from the port and Ellaria picked up her robes and came running down off of the quarterdeck.

No sooner had Oberyn released you to slip from the saddle and to the ground did she have you gathered in her arms. Your hood fell and she put her hands in your hair and kissed you. “Thank the gods,” she breathed against your mouth and you smiled, a few tears of relief forming in the corners of your eyes.

Oberyn swung his leg and jumped down, handing the beast off to one of his men before turning a fond grin upon the two of you. “I do believe I told you so.”

“Not now,” she chastised him with a smile and a shake of her head but she kept her gaze on you. “Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine. Ellaria--” you swallowed hard and took her hands in yours and gripped them tightly. “I didn’t--I would never have left..”

“I know, I know, sweet girl,” she brushed your hair back from her face and nodded. “Oberyn knew. You’re safe.” She kissed you again and drew you into her body, resting her chin on your shoulder and looking at Oberyn standing behind you. “What have we done?” she asked with a smile, her tone saying full well that the consequences didn’t matter.

“With any luck,” he shrugged and rubbed his chin as a smirk overtook his face. “We started a war.”

--

You had no idea just how long you had been on the open water, the days all seemed to run together. The sun rose, the sun set, and as far as the eye could see was just blue water that blended with blue skies. Your fingers twisted idly in the chain of your mother’s necklace that sat nestled between your breasts inside of your bodice--the only worldly possession you had made sure to grab when fleeing the Red Keep. Your lovers had assured you that their first task in Dorne would be to buy you everything you needed, but none of that seemed to matter that much.

The whole feeling of getting further and further away from your old life in King’s Landing seemed surreal. The idea that you didn’t have to return to Casterly Rock didn’t feel like it could possibly be true, but it was. As you stood on the bow of the ship with your hands on the railing and the wind in your hair, you knew that it was true--there was no going back.

Solidly strong arms slid around your waist as sun kissed skin nosed your neck and you leaned back against the solid chest of Oberyn Martell. You had been so caught up in your thoughts, that you hadn’t heard his boots on the planks behind you.

“How is she?” you asked quietly and he spoke as he rested his chin on your shoulder.

“She’s fine,” he heaved a sigh when you reached back to put your hand in his hair. “Finally asleep--hopefully she stays that way for a while.”

True to what she had told you in the brothel, as soon as the ship broke the waters of the open ocean, Ellaria had become almost violently sea sick. She had spent the majority of the trip with her entire body over the wooden rails, Oberyn and you taking turns holding her long, dark curls out of the way as she emptied her stomach until there was nothing left. She refused to eat, and when she finally caved and allowed even the smallest morsel to pass her lips, it wound up back in the water a few hours later.

“I feel awful for her.”

“It happens every time,” he said, trying to ease your concerns. “It is a small price to pay to see the world--her words, my dear, not mine.”

You nod and keep your eyes on the horizon as he moves your hair to the side. The action bares your neck to him and your eyes close slowly as you feel his lips start a trail at your shoulder.

“Did you ever send word to your family?” You asked finally, putting your hands over his on your abdomen.

“No,” he answered flatly. “I thought I’d let it be a surprise.”

“I don’t think that’s the best idea.” Your voice was chastising and it made him nip your neck and chuckle when you jumped.

“I’m a Prince of Dorne,” he continued. “You need to get used to that. You don’t need to ask permission anymore.” He kissed up to the shell of your ear and whispered. “What’s our rule?”

The action caused you to shiver and you squeezed his hand. “Don’t apologize.”

“Exactly. Most people spend their entire lives making excuses and apologies for the things they truly desire--we are not most people.” One of his hands slid up from your waist to cup your breast through your bodice as he licked a slow, wet line down the side of your throat.

“Oberyn…” you bit your lip and let out a shaky breath before briefly glancing over your shoulder to make sure none of his men had their attention on the two of you. “Stop--” you moved his hand from your breasts and back to your waist.

“As you wish,” he grinned against your skin and went back to resting his chin on your shoulder and looking out at the water. “But the second we get settled in our chambers in the palace--you and Ellaria are both mine.”

“Our chambers?” you asked, turning your head to smile at him and he hummed in agreement.

“Of course. Unless you’d rather sleep elsewhere?” he teased and chuckled as you shook your head. He was quiet for a few moments before he squeezed you gently, moving one of his arms to point across the horizon. “Look, my love.”

Your gaze followed his arm and your heart raced as the horizon broke to show that there was indeed land on the other side of the world. The smile that broke across your face was so wide that it almost hurt. Unlike the shore of King’s landing and Casterly Rock, there were no cliffs, no crags, no ragged edges to dull the beauty of the waves and darken the landscape. No, this was very different. The sandy beaches were warm and inviting, the foam from each crest of the waves broke against the shoreline and rolled back to let the sunlight sparkle off of the surface. You wanted to jump into the water, to feel the sand against your skin, to immerse yourself in what was to be your new home.

As if sensing your thoughts, Oberyn lowered his voice and spoke against your hair, “Welcome to Dorne, Lioness.”

--

[Next Chapter]

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[taetaespeaches]

“Yeah, I’m drunk. And you’re wearing my t-shirt and I fucking love you.”

jimin x reader (or oc) genre: angst word count: 3.2K

a/n: Hi lovelies, this was requested a while back. It’s Jimin angst based on Childish Gambino’s ‘Sober’. I went a little overboard with this, but I didn’t know where to stop lmao. It’s not really fluffy at all, but it’s not just pure angst. Like I gave Jimin and reader some hope, but my goal was to show the complexity of emotions between people who love each other. I hope you all enjoy and thanks for reading :))

SATURDAY nights used to be a lot more interesting. Not that you ever did much, but you never had to do anything when you were with him. Just existing in each other’s presence was always more than enough.

If he was with you this particular night, if nothing went wrong a month ago, you’d probably be a bottle of wine in, slow dancing together in the living room.

But he wasn’t there, and this Saturday night was much like every Saturday night you’d been experiencing over the last month. You were sat on your couch, Glee playing on the tv in the background, a glass of wine in one hand and your phone in the other. You scrolled through Facebook, judging most of your friend list and the stupid cheesy posts they shared. You hated the fucking app, but you were sad and lonely, and you needed a distraction from the tears that came in response to Klaine’s first kiss. You needed a distraction from the man that swirled around your mind constantly. He never left. Always there, reminding you of how much you missed him.

If it was just Saturday nights, though, you could probably live without him a little easier. It was all the other nights without him that really hurt. Saturday night was just the night you could finally sit down and feel it.

However, as much as you missed him, he’s the one who ended things. He had tried texting and calling a few times, but you never answered, partially out of hurt, partially out of stubbornness. You had a lot of pent up anger toward him, and though you still loved him, you weren’t sure if love was enough anymore.

Without putting too much thought into it, you tossed your phone onto the coffee table and set your glass of wine down next to it before you stood up and walked toward your bedroom. Digging in one of your dresser drawers, you pulled random shirts out until you located the old black one that he had left at your place when you first started dating. You wore it often, especially when he was away on tour. After the breakup, you shoved the t-shirt in the drawer, and though you wanted to take it out nearly every night before bed, you never did.

But now with the shirt in your hands, you found yourself setting it on the bed for a moment as you stripped off your own top, replacing it with your ex’s. It didn’t smell like him anymore, but it still made you feel a sort of comfort. The kind of comfort you used to feel being in his embrace.

As you looked down at your body, wrapping your arms around yourself, you were startled by a sudden knock on your door.

“Jesus,” you breathed out in surprise. Your eyes bounced to the alarm clock across the room to see it was 1:03 a.m. Who the fuck—

The person knocked again, your heart rate speeding up as you slowly walked out of your bedroom. You scanned the room quickly, searching for a weapon, not sure what you would even do if it was someone dangerous. But then, the person spoke, and you realized no weapon could protect you.  

“Dear,” the voice called out, muffled through the wooden door. His voice.

You quickly made your way to the door, placing your hand on the knob, but you couldn’t bring yourself to open it.

“Are you here?” he asked, and you could hear the sadness seeping into his tone.

You took a deep breath, resting your forehead against the cold painted wood. Twisting the knob, you cracked the door, peeking through it to see Jimin’s stature, his arms held up where they rested on each side of the door frame, his head hung as he stared at his feet.

He slowly looked up, his fringe falling into his eyes. Standing up straight, he pushed his hand through his hair, allowing you to see his blood shot eyes when his gaze met yours. His bottom lip quivered as he breathed out, “Hi.” The word was simple. One syllable. But it left his lips like a muted crescendo, quiet in volume but deafening in unsaid confessions, apologies, and regrets.

You couldn’t do this right now. But could you really send him away? “What are you doing here?”

“I—” he started before swiping his tongue across his lips as you opened the door a bit wider. “I mi—I don’t know,” he told you, his eyes drifting down your frame, his eyes softening as he realized you were wearing his t-shirt.

“You’re drunk.”

“Yeah,” he said simply.

“How did you get here?” You asked, crossing your arms across your chest.

“I took a cab,” he told you. “Can I come in?”

“Jimin,” you warned, shaking your head.

Your ex-boyfriend shot you a desperate look, tears filling his gorgeous eyes. “Please,” he whispered out, the tone shattering your heart.

You blinked your eyes as tears began forming, opening the door wider and walking away, leaving it open for him to enter.

Jimin stumbled into your apartment and tried to shut the door quietly but wasn’t able to control his motor skills well enough, closing it with a loud bang.

“Jesus,” you cringed at the sound. “Jimin, it’s one in the morning.”

“Sorry,” he apologized.

You stared at him as his eyes peered into yours. When neither of you spoke, you shrugged, and he cracked a small smile. “What?” He asked through his slightly upturned lips.

“Why are you here?” You asked him sternly.

Jimin looked around the apartment for a moment as he gathered his thoughts, his mind severely clouded at the moment. Seeing him inside your home again brought back too many painful memories. “I know it can be hard between us, but what if we just gave it some time?”

A lump immediately formed in your throat as he spoke his thoughts to you, his diction slurred, the words blending slightly together but unmistakable in their meaning.

“I know we had our problems, but we can solve them,” he told you as a tear rolled down his cheek, Jimin quickly reaching up to wipe it away.

“It’s not that easy,” you softly spoke back, not trusting your voice to speak too loudly. “You said that, those are your words.”

“I was fucking dumb,” he beat himself up. “I still love you and if you still love me then why can’t it be easy?”

“Jimin,” you whimpered. “You’re drunk.”

“Yeah, I’m drunk,” he said frustratedly. “And you’re wearing my t-shirt and I fucking love you.”

You looked down at your shirt, mentally cursing yourself for even putting it on. “This isn’t a conversation for when you’re drunk, you know that,” you told him, looking around the room for something to distract you with.

“I’m always drunk,” he spat out through tears. The sight of Jimin crying always broke you and seeing him in this state under the circumstances was nearly unbearable. But it also made you angry.

“I’m not doing this with you right now, it’s not the time,” you told him dropping your arms to your sides.

“When is the time for you?” He asked, his voice raised in response to his frustration.

“When you’re not fucking drunk and showing up here at one in the morning,” you shouted back. “This isn’t fair, you broke up with me over text, Jimin. That hurt, and this hurts—”

“Just give me one night,” he begged, moving closer to you but stopping himself as he stumbled a bit, catching himself with the sofa. You instinctively stepped toward him as if you were going to stop him from falling. “One night,” he sobbed. “I can show you how much I love you.”

“Oh, so fucking me is the answer? That’s your plan?” You asked angrily.

“No,” he protested. “That’s not my plan, my plan is to—” he paused as he looked at the couch and the tv, the Warblers currently performing their regional setlist, Blaine front and center as he belted Pink’s ‘Raise Your Glass’. “Hold you,” he sniffled as tears dropped onto his cheeks. “And watch Glee with you, and dance around to the songs and,” sniffle, “finish that bottle off with you like we used to do.”

“You don’t need to finish the bottle, you’ve had enough,” you pointed out, halfheartedly teasing him. You and Jimin both cracked the tiniest of smiles before you sighed. “Now is not the time.”

He stared at you as he waited for you to explain your comment.

“It’s not fair to show up like this. You’re drunk so I can’t just send you away without worrying but having you here is killing me,” you explained in one breath, tears pouring from your eyes.

“Why is it killing you?”

“What?”

“Why is it killing you? Having me here?”

“You know I still love you,” you said just loud enough for him to hear. “I’m wearing your shirt for fucksake.” Jimin’s eyes widened at your confession, but you held your hand up to him, signaling for him to stay across the room from you. “I don’t think that getting back together is a good idea. I’m still hurt and mad and this is making me angrier and that’s why it’s not fair because I want to yell at you but seeing you cry—” your voice cracked, making you pause. “I can’t handle seeing you cry. You’re breaking my heart all over again, Jimin.”

Realizing the position he had put you in, he directed his broken gaze to his feet. “I’m s—I’m so sorry.” A sob racked through his body, his shoulders shaking, and you stepped toward him, unable to keep your distance any longer.

You placed a hand on his back but Jimin just gently pushed it away as he stood up straight and prepared to leave. “I shouldn’t have come here, I’m so sorry.” He tried to push past you, but you held your hands to his chest to halt him.

“Where are you going?” You asked him, your tone showing him how ridiculous you found him to be.

“Back to the dorm,” he gestured to your door, his eyes red and swollen from his tears.

“There’s no way I’m letting you leave in this condition and you know that,” you told him, guiding him to the couch. “You can sleep here.”

“Dear,” he whispered, only for you to shush him.

“You’ll leave in the morning.”  

It didn’t take long to get Jimin tucked in once you grabbed some blankets and a pillow from the linen closet. He easily plopped onto the couch, letting you gently toss the blanket over him. “You want Glee on or off?”

“On, please,” he mumbled, his cheek smushed against the couch cushion making his lips pout adorably. You couldn’t help the single breathy laugh that slipped out. He suddenly started digging in his pocket, pulling out his phone and holding it out to you. “This is dead.”

“I’ll charge it for you.” Taking the phone from him, you started to walk away, however, you momentarily stalled when he called out your name.

“What?” You asked gently.

“Goodnight.”

“Night, Jimin.”

“I love you.”

Fuck. You knew he didn’t mean to say it, but you also knew he did still love you. Hearing him say it so casually, even under the clouded veil of exhaustion and alcohol, was too normal for the situation. That simple mistaken I love you unlocked the door inside your heart where you had attempted to bury him. You couldn’t deny it anymore, you missed him, and you were mad at yourself for giving up so easily. Now you were afraid you two could never overcome the pain you both put each other through.

You tried to distract yourself from your own thoughts as you plugged Jimin’s phone in to charge. Any random observation of your surroundings- the refrigerator filter needed replaced, the coffee pot clock needed reset- you tried to hold onto, but nothing could overcome Jimin’s presence in your mind. Especially with him sleeping on your couch just a few feet away.

Looking down at the phone, you realized it wasn’t quite dead yet, and Jimin had to have had about 50 texts from Taehyung and Hoseok, and about 17 more calls.

“Shit,” you sighed. Suddenly, the phone started vibrating, Taehyung’s name across the screen. You thought about ignoring it, but you understood that they had to be worried. Answering the phone, before you could even greet your ex-boyfriend’s best friend, he was yelling through the speaker.

“Where the hell are you? Are you safe?” He shouted in one breath.

You sighed before answering. “Hey Tae.”

There was a moment of silence before Taehyung spoke again. “Oh god,” he breathed out. “Are you ok?”

“Define ok,” you dryly laughed.

“I’m so sorry,” he apologized on behalf of his friend. “I thought for like a split second he might show up at your place, but I didn’t think he actually would for real.”

“No it’s ok,” you tried to relieve Taehyung of his unnecessary guilt.

“Not it’s not.”

“Well,” you scoffed. “No, it’s not. But it’s better than him wandering around the street. Instead, he’s passed out on my sofa with Glee on the tv.”

“Oh my god,” Tae chuckled. “We’ll come get him.”

“Where is he?” You heard a panicked Hoseok ask. Taehyung must have given him a look that said everything, because the next thing you heard was Hoseok saying, “oh no.”

“Guys, it’s late. Just go home, you can get him in the morning. He’s already asleep, just leave him.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, go home.” When you heard no response, you knew they were still considering coming and collecting their drunken runaway friend. “Guys, please. I just want you two home safe.”

Taehyung sighed before agreeing. “Fine. I’m really sorry—”

“Tae, it’s not your fault. I’ll see you tomorrow. Get some rest.” With that, you ended the call.

Sighing, you looked back at the sofa, hearing light snores come from Jimin that only really emerged when he was really tired or drunk, in this case both. Tears forming in your eyes once again, you went to get ready for bed. You considered changing your shirt but decided against it. You didn’t want to take it off.

Your night was restless, mostly tossing and turning as your anxiety grew over the fact that your ex was in your living room.

A little after 7 a.m., you decided to give up on the idea of sleep and crawled out of bed, eyes swollen from unrest. Leaving your room, you went straight to the coffee pot, starting a pot in hopes that it would keep you alive through the morning. You avoided looking at the couch. Part of you was afraid he’d still be there. A bigger part of you was terrified he wouldn’t be.

However, a groan from Jimin not even three seconds later told you he was very much still there. Looking toward him, you watched as he sat up, holding his head in pain from the very obvious hangover that was settling in already.

“Morning,” you called out, purposely loud and abruptly, Jimin shuttering at the sound. Now, in the light of morning, the anger was overtaking the sadness, probably due to a sleepless night and the anxious feeling in your gut.

“Fuck,” he mumbled, looking toward you with a guilty look.

“Don’t get used to the hospitality,” you bitterly told him. “This isn’t a hotel and it’s not a rehab center.”

“Jesus,” he groaned. “I’m sorry I showed up, it won’t happen again.” His hangover and your attitude was causing him to react in anger as well.

“It shouldn’t have happened in the first place, what a shitty position to put me in,” you kept on, Jimin trying to look stoic and unaffected, though he never was good at hiding his emotions.

“I know, I get it, I said I’m sorry. I’ll leave,” he said as he stood up. “Where’s my phone?”

Unplugging his phone, you walked toward him, holding it out for him. “Your friends were worried,” you said as he took the phone with a small ‘thank you’. “I talked to them last night and told them to come get you this morning. You might as well wait for them.”

Going through his phone, he sighed at all the messages from Tae and Hobi. The latest message said they’d be there at 7:30 to get him.

“They’ll be here in ten minutes,” he told you, tucking his phone into his pocket. “Can we talk? Please?”

Staring at him for a moment before nodding, you turned around to go to the kitchen. On instinct, you grabbed two coffee mugs and poured him a cup. “Here,” you said, setting the cup across the island for him. He slowly appeared, taking the mug and taking a sip.

“Thank you,” he mumbled.

“You broke up with me over a text while you were away on tour. Couldn’t even spare me a facetime.” The memory hurt, and you knew you would never be able to give your relationship another shot if you couldn’t move past it.

“I know,” he nodded. “It was selfish.”

“It wasn’t just selfish, it was stupid and—” you paused, trying to collect yourself before you gave away how heartbroken you still were.

However, as the tears formed in your eyes, Jimin set his coffee down, peering at your face. “Dear,” he whispered.

“It felt like you didn’t deem me worthy enough for a discussion. Or that I wasn’t important enough to keep trying. You could just get rid of me and things would be easier for you,” you said through a broken voice, tears threatening to fall.

Instead of responding right away, Jimin let out a sniffle as a tear fell from his cheek to the countertop. “Chim,” you barely spoke as tears rolled down your own face. “Don’t cry.”

“I’m not,” he sniffled again, wiping his face as he started crying more. The action was so Jimin, falling into more tears when told not to cry but insisting he wasn’t crying. You couldn’t help but let out a weak giggle as you cried. “Can we just try again?” He pleaded, looking up at you with puffy wet glossy eyes.

“I want to,” you told him as you set your hands around your coffee mug. “But I’m so hurt and mad still and I can’t be with you with these feelings lingering.”

“What if we take it slow? Start over? I could win you back,” he assured you, reaching across the island and wrapping his hands overtop yours on your mug. “Let me open up your mind to us. I promise your heart will follow.”

You bit back a grin at his speech, appreciating the words but finding them humorous in their poetic nature. “Are you a poet now?”

“If you want me to be,” he told you as his lips quirked up.

You allowed yourself to smile, just a little bit, pointing your gaze down to his hands that were still cradling yours. “You have your work cut out for you, Park Jimin,” you told him as you lifted your right pointer finger, letting it sooth over Jimin’s digit.

His eyes glanced at your finger before they bounced back to your face, taking in every feature he had missed for the past month. Grinning, he curled his finger over yours, your gaze finding Jimin’s in response to the small gesture. “I guess I better get to work then.”

“Can I tell you something?” You asked him, Jimin’s eyes widening as he nodded. “I’m rooting for you.”

[peakyswritings]

Another Love

Tommy Shelby x female!reader

A/N: hi! This is my first fic and I don’t actually know how I feel about it. I’ve been inspired by the song “Another Love” by Tom Odell and I used #13 and #40 from the angst prompt list. Please keep in mind that English is not my first language, so forgive me if you find any mistake

Warnings: angst, smoking, drinking, slight self-hate

The gif is not mine, credits to the owner

All my tears have been used up on another love

The first time you met Tomas Shelby was at the Garrison. You where new in town and you had just started working there as a barmaid, he was in the private room with his brothers, smoking and drinking whiskey. Harry had warned you about them, he had told you that every order was on the house and to be sure that they always had their glasses refilled in the shortest amount of time. You didn’t know exactly what kind of business the Peaky Blinders were in, but you were not blind. Three things caught your attention in the first week. First, they had blades in their caps. The second thing you noticed was the respect and fear people showed towards them. Last but not least, they always carried guns. You tried to follow Harry’s advice, trying to avoid any kind of personal contact with them and only getting close to them to take their orders and refill their glasses.

That was until that night.

You and Tommy had never talked much before- just some small talk, but nothing serious- and he never paid particular attention to you, but that night something changed. It was closing time, Harry had already headed home because it was your turn to close the Garrison. The customers were gone and you were cleaning up the last glasses, when he entered the pub. He was drenched by the rain and he looked exhausted. He didn’t say a word as he let himself fall on a chair and he lit himself a cigarette.

“Do you need something, Mr Shelby?” you asked politely. You surely didn’t expect him to show up at that hour of the night.

“Just pour me some whiskey, Y/N” he said taking a drag from his cigarette.

You did as he said, then you turned your back to him to keep cleaning the counter. You both stayed silent for a while and for the whole time you could feel his eyes on you. After a couple glasses of whiskey and what seemed a tremendous amount of time, he finally talked.

“You know, there was a woman...”

That night he told you about his previous girlfriend, Grace. Apparently, she was a spy for the Crown and he fell in love with her. She had left for America a couple months before your arrival in Small Heath and he had just been told that she got married with some rich man. You didn’t know what made him open up to you, maybe it was the whiskey, maybe his tiredness or maybe it was the fact that customers always talked about their problems with the barmaids. However, you could feel that he needed to take something off his chest, so you just listened to him.

You were surprised to see him like that. He always seemed emotionless and controlled, but that night he seemed...beaten. His usually neat suit was drenched and wrinkled, his hair was wet and he smoked cigarette after cigarette. In his worn out state he seemed more human and you felt something that you couldn’t recognise.

There was something about him that attracted you like a moth to a flame.

You didn’t talk about that again after that night and he acted like nothing happened. You thought that he probably regretted the way he opened up to you in his drunken state, but you decided not to bring it up. Actually, something did change from that night. You talked more, sometimes he would sit on a stool in front of you instead of staying in the private room just to keep you company. The more time passed, the more you found yourself catching feelings for that broken man.

I wanna take you somewhere so you know I care, but it’s so cold and I don’t know where

I brought you daffodils in a pretty string, but they won’t flower like they did last spring

Soon your friendship became something more. At the beginning things where amazing and you discovered that behind that hard exterior there was a caring and kind man. He always cared for you, making sure you where alright and he walked you home every night. Most nights you invited him in, you sat on the couch and you spent the night talking. However, as time passed by, you noticed that something was off, as if he was restrained and still deciding if he could trust you. He started to pull away, he sat in the private room of the Garrison more often, when he walked you home he didn’t come inside anymore.

Little did you know, that the cause of his detachment was his previous relationship. When Grace decided to go away, some part of him went away with her. He had feelings for you, but he was scared, he didn’t want to be hurt like that again. He knew that by pulling away from you he was hurting your feelings, he just couldn’t help it. He tried to make an effort to fix that, despite his fear and insecurity.

One morning he came to your house. The first thing you noticed when you opened the door was a beautiful bouquet of yellow daffodils surrounded by a pretty pink string.

“They say gifting a bouquet of daffodils ensures happiness” he said, handing you the flowers.

You gave him a big smile and thanked him as you took the flowers to put them in a vase, moving away from the doorstep to let him in.

“Do you want a cup of tea? I was preparing it” you said as you walked towards the teapot.

“Sure”

He sat at the table and you poured you both a cup of tea, before sitting in front of him. He was silent and he was trying to find the right words to say. He wanted to tell you that he was sorry, that he didn’t mean to push you away, that what he felt for you was real and that he was just scared. You were slowly becoming an essential part of his life and he was terrified. He ended up going away without saying a word about his feelings. Actually, he barely said a word at all, leaving you sad and confused.

And I wanna kiss you, make you feel alright

I’m just so tired to share my nights

I wanna cry and I wanna love

But all my tears have been used up

On another love

He didn’t want to lose you, nevertheless he kept on pushing you away, too scared to open up and to let you see the deepest parts of him, too scared to let you in only for you to walk away afraid of what you’d see. He knew that if he let you in, you would have noticed how broken and hopeless he was and you would have walked away. Just like Grace had.

He wanted to spend the night with you again, he wanted to kiss you, he wanted to make you laugh and to keep you safe, but he was restrained. He just couldn’t bring himself to do that.

Eventually you got tired of the situation. You had waited for months, given him the space he needed, but at some point it was just too much. A week after the day he left your house without an explanation you decided to confront him. It was late at night, you had just closed the Garrison and he was walking you home. As usual you invited him in and, just like every other time you had asked him in the past two months, he told you he was tired.

“Please, Tommy. I need to talk to you. If you don’t want to come inside, then we can talk here. But we can’t avoid this conversation anymore”

He knew it was a matter of time before you got tired and confronted him. He thought he had prepared himself for this, that he would have been able to face the situation when the right moment came, but he was wrong. Nothing could prepare him to let you go. You went inside and you hung your coat, then you turned to face him. He looked you in the eyes, waiting for you to talk.

“Tommy I can’t do this anymore. I’ve tried to give you some space, I waited for you, but now it’s just too much...” you said hoping to provoke something in him, something that could make him understand that he was losing you for good.

He looked hurt for a moment, but then he put on his usual mask of indifference, looking away from you.

“It’s fine, if that’s what you want” he said in a emotionless voice.

“So you basically don’t care” you crossed your arms and you kept on looking at him.

“No.”

Just one word. It was all se said before lighting up a cigarette. It would have hurt you, if you didn’t know he was lying. In the past months you had learned to read him and you could always tell when he wasn’t telling the truth.

“You’re lying”

He didn’t say a word and he kept on looking away from you. You knew he was acting like that because he didn’t want you to see that he was hurt. He did that because if he didn’t show any emotion, maybe it would have been easier to convince himself that he was not hurt. That he was alright.

“Stop running from your feelings!”

He took a last drag from his cigarette before putting it out in the ashtray and only then he looked at you.

“I want to stay with you, I want to be here for you, but I can’t if you don’t let me!”

His gaze softened when your voice cracked, but still, he didn’t say a word.

“Talk to me for God’s sake!” you snapped, exhausted.

After a few moments, he finally talked and, for the first time in a long time, he opened up to you. It was the only thing he could do if he wanted you to stay.

“I’m scared, Y/N. I’m scared to let you in because I know that you will walk away too. I’m afraid you’ll end up seeing me the way that I see myself” he looked away from you again.

You took some steps towards him and you put a hand on his cheek and stroking it gently, to make him look at you.

“There’s nothing to be scared of. I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere. I promise. Nothing would make me walk away from you”

You said those words looking at him in the eyes, hoping to make him understand that you were telling the truth.

“I love you, Tommy. Nothing could make me love you less”

It was the first time you said it and you meant it. He looked at you speechless. You loved him.

You loved him.

He he moved closer, and he gently put his lips on yours. It was a sweet kiss, full of love and things unsaid.

“I love you too, Y/N. And I’m sorry. Please give me another chance. I want to make this right. I will make this right. I promise.” he said with his husky voice, looking at you with his piercing blue eyes. He meant that. You didn’t answer, you just pulled him in for a kiss.

You knew it wouldn’t be easy, that there would have been ups and downs, that his wounds wouldn’t heal so easily. Nevertheless, you knew that all of that was worth it, as long as you had each other.

[rattyoakenbitch]

the hobbit: “love sick” ₊˚ ⸝ thorin x reader

❝they all think I have it all i’m nothing without you all my dreams and all the lights mean nothing without you..❞ gif credit: n/a song: lana del rey - without you 

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥

pairings: thorin oakenshield x reader

warnings: angst, insecurity, language

summary: i’m unoriginal as fuck. thorin goes yandere mode in this one sakjdskfhsf

Thorin tossed and turned in his chambers, unable to sleep. His mind was currently occupied with thoughts of you. Each time you crossed his mind, (which was like, all the time) it made his heart flutter. Until his mind kept going back to the thought of you being serenaded by the Dwarves of his Company. He furrowed his brows in frustration. During the journey which happened a little while ago, you had formed strong and close bonds with each member of Thorin’s Company. Although Thorin knew you were just being friendly, deep down, he was jealous of all the affection you showed to the other Dwarves, excluding him. You never seemed to notice the way Thorin looked at you, and how he still looks at you. How his eyes begged for a piece of your love. In truth, you’ve always felt the same. But you weren’t a dwarrowdam or royalty, so you figured Thorin wouldn’t be interested in you. You tried to keep your distance and forget about it. Plus, he was a king. He had all the riches and he got his happy ending. Why would he need you? 

One particular day, the bustle of Erebor seemed to settle down. Considering it wasn’t such a busy day, Thorin got off his duties early. After finishing a rather short meeting, he walked around the halls of Erebor absentmindedly. The sound of laughter and chatter pulled him from his thoughts. He looked ahead and saw Kili, Fili, Ori, and you, walking towards him. You looked up and noticed Thorin, but quickly diverted your gaze.

“What are you doing this morning?” 

You looked back at Thorin, your eyes instantly locking with his. His question was directed to the four of you, but you felt him ask you especially. Tension filled the air and you bit your lip nervously, waiting for someone else to answer.

“Nothing, Uncle. We were just--”

“Should you not be attending to your duties like responsible princes?”

“We finished them, Uncle.”

“I won’t hear it. Get busy.” With that, Fili & Kili mumbled a ‘bye’ and began to walk off. You gave them a sad smile and waved.

“Bye, boys! We’ll talk later!”

Hearing your voice lightened their mood. They looked back and waved.

“Until later, Y/N!”

Ori stood by your side awkwardly. Thorin sent him a sharp glare. 

“Why are you not with Dori?”

Ori stuttered before following in the princes’ direction, looking down with a defeated expression. 

“Bye bye, Ori! We’ll all meet up later,” you chirped happily, despite Thorin’s cold stares. Ori sent you a light smile before turning the corner. Now, it was just you and Thorin. Your eyes met with his, and you noticed his expression soften. But you scoffed, still angry at his harsh treatment with the Dwarves. Guess Thorin never got over himself.

“So, are we going to have a staring contest or would you like to scold me, too?”

“Why do you do that? Do you like the attention from the other Dwarves?” You were taken aback by the question. Thorin didn’t sound very angry. His voice displayed hurt, and.. jealousy?

“Excuse me? Why do I do what?”

Thorin took a step closer.

“I see the way you talk to them. I see the way you look at them. “

You looked at Thorin with a bewildered expression. This was so unlike him. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you crossed your arms, your facial expression hardened. You tried your best to look and sound confident, yet the shakiness in your voice betrayed you. “Am I not allowed to have friends? The world doesn’t revolve around you, Thorin. I have no idea what’s gotten into you.”

“Why can’t you do the same to me? Do you really hate me?”

“I don’t hate you! But you’re a king, Thorin,” you admitted. “I didn’t think you would make such a big deal out of it.. You’re always busy and I never get to see you anymore. If you really wanted my company that badly, you could have told me.” 

“I’m telling you now.” Thorin came closer until he was just inches away from you, his breath fanning your face. Without giving you the chance to say another word, Thorin’s lips met with yours, his kisses rough and intense. Although, you weren’t complaining. You had been waiting for his moment for way too long. For him to finally claim you as his. You broke the kiss briefly, resting your forehead against Thorin’s.

You joked, smirking, “You don’t have dragon-sickness, do you?” 

“Just love-sick, ghivashel.”

[milky-pillow]

Song: Then (B.I) / DEMO.1 (131) Characters: Yamada Ichiro, Yamada Jiro, Yamada Saburo, Reader Relationship(s): Yamada Ichiro/Reader

originally posted on ao3 // song lyrics used: here

“I guess I must live on even though you aren’t by my side. Or was it me who wasn’t by your side first?”

You can’t remember the last time you truly smiled. The sunlight beams through the windows, hitting your face. Since you’ve parted with Ichiro, you have filled your life with distractions. Anything that can get your mind off of him worked. You roll off your bed and stretch, letting the sun warm your body. To block any sadness from entering your soul, you decide to go out to eat breakfast.

“A cafe… pancakes maybe? Ooo, and a cup of coffee or something,” you murmur to yourself, feeling your hunger grow by the minute.

Though it’s early, the streets of Ikebukuro are bustling with people. Most people seem to be going to work, their formal clothing making you stick out like a sore thumb.

Quickly ordering your food, you take a seat near a window-- your usual seat. People-watching is calming to you. Their lives seem to be so different from yours and it is the only thing that makes you feel unique. You like to guess what kind of jobs people were making their way towards as they pass. Judging their outfits and comparing it to your own is also another pastime.

“Here’s your order,” a worker comes by and places your drink and food on your table with a smile. Your stomach growls at your thought at finally eating.

You nod to them, “thank you.”

Leaving you be, you spend your time between scrolling your phone, eating, and observing people. Before you know it, an hour passed. Already having paid for your food, you bring your empty plate and glass by the counter and leave to continue your day.

“And I know my words must seem like excuses, but it was never my intention to hurt you.”

“Ichiro, I have my own life to live! Don’t you have your brothers to look out for?” you lashed at Ichiro.

His eyes seemed to flash with anger-- a look you’ve never seen before, “am I not allowed to care for you?”

A pang in your heart. Misunderstanding, yet you couldn’t get yourself to say anything. He could care, but you felt it was getting out of hand. Were you overthinking it? No way. You couldn’t be.

“I never said you couldn’t. Don’t twist my words,” you folded your arms with a huff, “plus, why do you care about me so much now? I thought you were too busy ‘preparing for rap battles’ or whatever. Sometimes it seems like you care more about that stupid hypnosis mic of yours than you care about me!”

“That’s not true Y/n, and you know it! If you had a problem with that, why did you just tell me?”

“You know that’s not what this is about. Don’t change the subject like that.”

You couldn’t believe you were arguing in his home. Not wanting his brothers to see, you made your way towards the door, hoping Ichiro would follow.

“Where are you going now? The bar? Someone else?” His questions made you stop all movement.

Tears filled your eyes as you dropped your head to the ground, “so that’s how you see me? Ichiro, I don’t want to argue here. We can’t have your brothers hearing this; they don’t deserve to hear this.”

As if someone flipped a switch, his tone softened, “look, Y/n… you know I didn’t mean it like that.”

“It definitely seemed like it though. You know what? Just leave me alone. I can’t handle this right now,” the cracking in your voice gave away your sadness. Ichiro took a step towards you, but you stopped him, “if you cared, you’d give me time. Time: that’s all I ask of you.”

Unable to look at him, you could only listen to his response, “okay, if that’s what you want. Just… know that I’ll be waiting for you.”

“Even if I never learn to love for the rest of my life, if we ever meet again for as long as I live, I promise to keep my loyalty then.”

Looking at your watch, you wait by the gate for Jiro. Compared to Saburo, Jiro sometimes has you tutor him. Every Wednesday is what you both agreed on. Since then, you dread Wednesdays. It means you have to go into their home. The same home that you and Ichiro argued in. You are lucky enough that Ichiro is usually out, but when he’s around you do your best to avoid talking to him at all costs.

“Did I make you wait long?” Jiro runs over to you, clearly out of breath.

You shake your head, “no. I just got here a few minutes ago, and waiting doesn’t hurt.”

Jiro makes small talk while you head over to his house, boasting about something amazing Ichiro has done earlier that week. While it tends to go in one ear and out the other, he says something interesting: “he doesn’t want me to tell you, but he saw you while you were shopping over the day. He told Saburo and I that he was too nervous to talk to you. Nervous! Brother Ichiro is never like that!”

You are taken aback by what Jiro said, “he was? He shouldn’t have to feel that way, that’s so unlike him.”

Jiro laughs, agreeing with your statement as you both enter his living room and get started on tutoring.

“How did you get that?” Jiro will ask every once in a while on a math problem. As usual, you’ll walk him through each step until he understands the concept.

Every once in a while Saburo will pop in to pick on his older brother, or you’ll take breaks for snacks, but for the most part, you were incredibly focused on helping Jiro.

“I woke up from a deep dream, but was never able to tell you that you were the reason I felt like I was living.”

The day after your dispute with Ichiro, you woke up in a cold sweat. Unable to recall anything that happened the previous night, you check your phone for the time.

12:45 pm. You overslept. You were lucky to not have any plans that day or you would’ve been screwed.

You sat up in disbelief when remembering your argument with Ichiro. “That really happened,” you told yourself. Part of you wanted to reach out to him, but you couldn’t get yourself to. While you remembered the hurtful words exchanged, you weren’t able to figure out what started the situation in the first place.

“He really thought I had another destination when leaving,” you feel your cheeks flare. Were you angry? Or maybe embarrassed? What made him think that in the first place?

You fall back onto your bed, covering your face with a pillow, tears slowly spreading and soiling your clean rectangular mold of fluff. What to do now? The person you deemed your other half seems to have turned into something else.

“Time?” you wept, “Is that really what I need?” Maybe reconciliation is what you needed, but you couldn’t dare to face him properly. If anything, you believed he needed to apologize and face the problem first. But how could he if he obeyed your wish for time apart? You didn’t dare think aloud, fearing that the worst would only come out of it.

It didn’t help that you would still have to see him every now and then. While twice or three times a week wasn’t harmful, you felt yourself becoming uneasy at the thought of seeing him. Either way, you had to get over it, there’s no avoiding it. You knew this, but you found it hard to accept it.

For the next hour, you reminded yourself of the happy memories the two of you had made together: the theme park visits, the cafe dates, the rap practices. Even the bittersweet memories of your winter walks and deep eye-opening discussions had you yearning for him.

It’s only been a day, it’s felt like a lifetime.

“I’m hoping this isn’t the end‒ I must see you soon.”

“I’m back!” Ichiro announces, entering the Ikebukuro home, unaware of your presence.

The two younger brothers run to the door to greet him while you sit in silence. Usually you’re able to fully avoid him, but there are times like this where he comes home earlier than expected.

“Ichiro! I got a one-hundred on my exam today!” Saburo beams to his eldest brother.

Jiro gets in front of Ichiro and excitedly announces, “I’m finally passing one of my classes thanks to Y/n!”

Pointing to you, his eyes immediately make their way to you. You avoid his gaze, sheepishly rubbing your neck.

“It’s nothing really,” you let out a nervous laugh, “Jiro just needed a push in the right direction is all.”

Ichiro makes his way over to you to eye you better, “thank you, Y/n. But have you been taking care of yourself? You look… tired. Have you been getting enough rest? You know you have to look after yourself.”

You look up at him, revealing your eye bags. He didn’t even have to see your face to recognize your exhaustion? A warm feeling spread through your body at the thought of him caring, but you didn’t let it get to your head.

“I- I do. It was just one of those nights where I didn’t get enough rest, I guess,” you lie with a tired smile. Sweat rolls down the side of your face and you’re unsure whether it’s from feeling unwell or from anxiousness.

“Y/n, are you sure?” Ichiro turns to his younger siblings, “Did you guys notice this?” They look at each other before shaking their heads.

“Look, Ichiro, I’m fine. I am taking care of myself. I even took a walk today!”

“Was that really it? Or was it because you picked up my brother from school?”

“No, really! I walked to that one cafe in the city that I go to all the time for breakfast today. Again, Ichiro, don’t worry about me.”

As much as you wanted to tell him to hop off you, you couldn’t get yourself to, so you let him continue to interrogate you and your well-being. Though, it wasn’t like you’d tell him the truth anyways.

“We left the memory of time losing its breath on the other side; But we brought back to reality the cherished memories we made so sadly, yet beautifully and now we must rewrite our story that we never wanted to bring to an end.”

There was a specific time that you recalled that day where you have never felt happier by Ichiro’s side. You two made a spontaneous trip to the seaside for the weekend. While you claimed it was to get away from the city, it was really to spend more time together. Luckily Jiro and Saburo were okay with being without Ichiro for those two days or you would’ve had to take them with you guys.

When you both arrived at the hotel, you raced each other to the hotel room. The winner got to decide what to do first and with so much to do, both of you wanted the upper hand on how to start the weekend that awaited the both of you.

Much to your surprise, you won with Ichiro being a few steps behind you. Letting out a victorious cheer, you open the door to the room you will be staying in. While you and Ichuro had organized your belongings, you decided to take a stroll by the beach first.

“The beach? Did you want to get a tan or build a sandcastle or something?” Ichiro laughed.

You shook your head, “not really, I just wanted to relax with a walk before we get into the heavy stuff, you know? Take it as a warm up for all the moving we’ll be doing later.” In all honesty, you just wanted to walk along the foreshore and mess around with him, but you didn’t want to sound like a kid. Building a sandcastle did pique your interest as his mentioning of it, so maybe you’ll consider it.

You took your bathing suit out from your suitcase along with some light clothing, going to the bathroom to change into them. When you came out, Ichiro had decided to change while waiting, wearing a different outfit than he was previously.

“Ready for the best trip ever?” Ichiro extended his hand for you to take. From the moment you took his hand till the end of the weekend, you had experienced such happiness that you knew you’d never get such an experience again.

“I dream a sad dream every night. I dance within the loss. Who will become my light? Will you ever extend your hand to me?”

“Y/n, you’re gonna stay for dinner, right?” Saburo gives you an innocent smile, but you know he’s doing it on purpose.

You hesitate, and before you can decline, Jiro pipes in, “take it as a thanks for all the tutoring!”

Reluctantly agreeing, you end up sitting with them to eat dinner. Jiro and Saburo brag to Ichiro about random things they did recently. All you do is listen and eat silently. The warmth of the food adds to the flavor of the food. You begin to list random ingredients that could be in the meal to busy yourself.

“So,” Saburo changes the subject, “how come you and Ichiro don’t hang out as much anymore?”

You look up at him in surprise, nearly choking on your food, “well, uh…”

“Saburo, don’t just ask questions like that,” Ichiro scolds him.

“No, it’s okay. I owe an explanation anyways,” you take another bite of the dinner before explaining, “I just needed some time alone. I thought it would help me to do something like that. I mean, I’ve seen loads of people do it and they come back a new and improved person, you know? Well, clearly that didn’t work out so well.”

The air seems to have thickened, but you laugh it off and wave your hands to dismiss your statement.

“Um, Y/n,” Ichiro whispers your name so his brothers don’t take notice, “could we talk after dinner?”

You nod, growing nervous. Because of that, you rush to eat your food before it gets to a point where you can’t eat anymore. The two younger brothers watch in both astonishment and confusion, but don’t ask any questions.

After dinner, Saburo and Jiro go back to their rooms to prepare for bed. With you and Ichiro sitting together, alone, Ichiro struggles to find where to start.

“How much longer do you plan on making yourself suffer?”

Out of anything he could have said, you weren’t expecting that.

“What? I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you shrug and attempt to play it off.

“I know you, Y/n. Why are you trying so hard to avoid me anyways? Was it because of that argument from before? That was months ago!”

“I- look. I didn’t want you babying me like you do with your brothers, okay? I’m not your sibling. I’m my own person. You pestered me so much about taking care of myself that I was overwhelmed I guess. I don’t even know. But after that night everything went downhill.”

“I didn’t know,” Ichiro looks down at his feet, “but was it really just that? It seemed like there was more bothering you that night.”

“Well,” you debate on whether or not to tell him, but decide it’s for the best that he knows, “you kind of assumed I was going to mess around when I was about to leave.”

“But I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Maybe you didn’t, but it sticks. Either way, I guess I was being too sensitive that night,” you cover your face with your hands in embarrassment, “I’m sorry Ichiro. I’m so sorry.”

“Y/n, it’s okay,” he pulls your hands away and looks into your eyes with a soft expression. He pulls you into a hug as you begin to cry, “I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have pestered you too much. I’ll be sure to not annoy you like that, but it just happens sometimes.”

You laugh, “that’s fine, as long as it’s not about every little thing I do. I forgive you.”

After the end of that conversation, you both decide to catch up on what happened over the past few months. The night ended up being full of laughter and happiness-- something you weren’t expecting to experience so soon.

END.

[midnightmagicx]

Happy Birthday @pon-ee​ ! I know we’re giving you your gift a whole day early but... LOL shenenagians. Here’s to another year of discord friendship. @soraofskye and I collaborated to put this together- I’m sure you can figure out who did what... and if you can’t, then it’s a mystery.

In celebration of your birthday and the birth of Ume, please enjoy the drawing and story of Siren Ume and Sea Monster Levi. ------

“I told you not to touch Ruri-Chan!” Leviathan exclaimed, his anger clearly showing as his second brother’s hand ran across his display of figurines. “Don’t touch anything on the shelf! I don’t want your filthy hands on it.”

Mammon rolled his eyes, “It’s just a toy, Levi. You can get another one.”

Leviathan stamped his foot in frustration. These normies just did not understand, “This is a limited edition figurine that I waited 5 hours in line for. DO. NOT. TOUCH.” 

Of course, Mammon, The Avatar of Greed did not want to listen. No one tells THE Mammon what he can or cannot do. Grabbing the figurine off of the shelf, Mammon dangled it in front of Leviathan’s face, “Whoops, my hand slipped.”

And that was all that it took for a fight to break out. In a quick flash, the other brothers were in Leviathan’s room, holding Mammon and Leviathan apart from each other. Lucifer sighed and shook his head, “One day of peace… that’s all I ask.” Then he looked up at the both of them, “Both of you, OUT. Until you’ve cooled yourselves down, do not come back.”

Now Leviathan found himself walking towards the outskirts of Devildom without a destination in sight. The quiet night did nothing to calm the anger that was buzzing through his mind. Leviathan sighed and shoved his hands into his pocket. Stupid Mammon. It was all his fault, why was Leviathan blamed in this? If Mammon had only listened, he would’ve still been at home playing his newest game.

Walking around aimlessly, Leviathan found himself staring into the depths of the ocean when the cold water hit his feet, shaking him out of his thoughts. “Maybe a swim will help me calm down,” Leviathan murmured, mostly to himself. He closed his eyes and summoned his demon self, a sense of relief flooded through him as he felt his horns and tail emerge. 

Leviathan sunk into the cold water, stretching himself out, allowing the water to flow seamlessly along his scales on his body. Yes, this was what he needed. Diving deeper, Leviathan allowed his eyes to adjust to the dark waters. In his true form his amber eyes seemed to glow along with the purple scales on his tail. The other fish in the sea started swimming in the opposite direction, as if they sensed a stronger presence around them. That didn’t bother Leviathan. He usually enjoyed swimming alone; it allowed him to clear his mind. 

Diving deeper into the ocean, Leviathan started swimming towards the forest to his favorite spot. It was a secluded spot a few miles away from the shore. Not many demons knew about that area. Leviathan swam slow, humming his favorite song while gliding through the ocean. A few moments later, Leviathan emerged to the surface, moving towards the rocks on the shallow end of the shore that started to come into focus. The lower half of his body rested in the water, as he propped himself up against the rocks. Leaning back and looking up at the night sky, Leviathan was already in a much better mood.

Leviathan sighed. Eventually he was going to have to go back home. It was still so unfair. He groaned, sinking his face back into the water in frustration. Leviathan pouted underwater. He folded his arms across his chest and took a deep breath and began counting. 1… 2… 3… 4…

His meditation was cut off when he heard a soft voice in the distance. Opening his eyes curiously, Leviathan’s head turned the direction of the sound that was coming from deep within the forest. Who was out there? No one knew about this place but him. 

The words he heard sounded foreign. Gliding closer to the sound, he focused on the lyrics on the words.

Follow the siren’s song To face this empty cycle Searching the darkest nights Searching the silence

Leviathan’s eyes widened as he slid behind the tree trunk. Sitting on a rock ahead was a siren. The moonlight shining down on her body. Beautiful green eyes staring up at the moon, with pink hair flowing down to her waist. Her tail was a magnificent dark blue, with long fins, that swayed under the waters. As she continued singing, Leviathan found himself entranced with her voice. Unable to look away, he stayed; mesmerized by her beauty and drawn in by her voice. No wonder why they say sirens are dangerous creatures. 

Leviathan shifted himself, causing the water to ripple through. Noticing the movement the singing stopped. The siren glanced over at Leviathan’s direction, “W-Who’s there?” She asked hesitantly, slowly moving her body back into the waters.

“Sorry,” Leviathan grumbled, turning a slight red from being caught, “I didn’t know someone else was here. I just heard you singing.” He moved from his hiding spot and swam out where the siren would be able to see him. 

The siren blushed, “Well, this is embarrassing,” she let out what sounded like a frustrated laugh. “My name is Ume.” She offered, looking at Leviathan. 

“Leviathan, but you can call me Levi.”

Ume gave a small smile, “So… do you come here often?”

Unable to look away from Ume, Leviathan shrugged, “Sometimes, when I need to get away from my brothers. They can be annoying.” 

Ume chuckled, but it sounded bitter, “I know what that’s like.” She sighed, “I needed to get away from my sisters,” she confessed, “And when I stumbled upon this place I thought it would be perfect.”

Leviathan nodded, unsure of what to say next. An awkward silence filled the air between them. Think of something to say! Leviathan cursed silently at himself.

“I’m supposed to be working right now,” Ume spoke again after the moment of silence, “But… I’m nervous and I ended up coming here instead.” Her voice trailed away with a twinge of regret. 

Curiously, Leviathan looked at her, completely mesmerized by the beautiful green eyes that looked back at him, “What’s your job supposed to be?”

Ume giggled, she found him endearing. A little awkward, but very endearing. “I’m a siren,” she said thoughtfully, “So I should be in the human realm with my sisters right now, seducing men and dragging them into the depths of the ocean.”

“Somehow you don’t sound excited to do that,” Leviathan countered, noticing the sadness on her face.

Ume sighed, “I’ve never done it before,” she said quietly. “What if my voice isn’t good enough to draw in attention? What if I let the person get away?” She blinked quickly, almost as if she was forcing her tears back. “My sisters… They’re all good at being sirens. They’re seductive, enchanting… and they get the job done. What if I... can’t?” 

“You managed to seduce a sea monster and you’re doubting that you could seduce a human?” Leviathan muttered under his breath. His face turned a bright red when he realized he spoke loudly enough for her to hear. 

Ume blushed, holding her hands up to cover the small smile on her face, “... D-Do you really mean that?”

Leviathan nodded, his eyes gazing around at anything but her. Ume smiled, her gaze at Leviathan softened, “Maybe… You can come and help me practice.” She said quietly.

“Help?” Leviathan asked quizzically. “How would I help you?”

“I wouldn’t mind having more practice singing… and maybe we could role play what could possibly happen if I went out to the human realm.” Ume suggested, “Maybe that would help me out.”

Did he just manage to score a date with a siren? Leviathan nodded, not trusting his words. Ume smiled brightly at him, “Great! I’ll see you back here tomorrow, same time! Thanks Levi!”

Waving at him, Ume dipped down below the waters and began swimming the other way. Leviathan watched her leave, his heart pounding loudly in his chest. 

—-

And this was how Leviathan found himself anxiously waiting for the days to end so he could leave the house at the same time every night, swimming over to the secluded forest where he would find Ume.

Every night she would be there, greeting him with the biggest smile on her face, “Hi Levi!” And he would listen to her singing. She never failed to capture his attention, her voice, her smile, her movements underwater… Leviathan found himself looking forward to these meetings every night. 

“Levi, if you were a human… would you come during my song?” Ume asked one night. She was laying down on the rock, playing with some seaweed that was tangled up on her tail.

Leviathan nodded, “Absolutely.” He swam around, folding his hands and resting his chin on the space next to her. He gazed up at her, a soft smile playing on his lips, “It would be like one of the anime’s that I have watched… a human hears a siren sing and he just can’t help but go towards her. And when the siren pulls him down the ocean with her, he leaves with no regrets.”

Ume beamed, reaching over to tuck a strand of his hair away from his eyes, “Thanks Levi. Practicing with you makes me feel like I could actually do this.”

Leviathan blushed, “Want to practice again?” He quickly asked, wanting to avoid the embarrassing feelings that were threatening to spill from his heart.

Ume nodded enthusiastically. Leviathan swam over to the other side of the lake. Aside from listening to her sing, they practiced every night. They would role play a scenario where Leviathan would pretend he was a human taking a swim in the ocean and would eventually be secluded by the siren he came across.

Ume began to sing, her voice steadily filling in the quiet night. It’s strange, Leviathan thought to himself. No matter how many times he heard her song, it always felt like the first time. He was mesmerized, enchanted, addicted to her voice. Maybe even addicted to her; her voice was like a drug that kept drawing him in. He felt his body flow naturally, swimming over towards her gently. It took no effort at all. It seemed as if her voice called for him and his body had no choice but to respond.

As Leviathan approached Ume, she leaned over to him, reaching a hand up to caress his face. His heart thumped wildly as his head leaned into her touch. Leviathan allowed her siren spell to take over him. Gazing into her green eyes he felt like he was in a trance. One that he never wanted to leave. Maybe this was why the victims of sirens left with no regrets. The feeling was euphoric; Ume could sing to him everyday and he would never tire of it.

Ume caressed his face, noticing how soft he felt against her hands. Her eyes interlocked with his amber ones as she noticed a passion burning in them. Ume felt her cheeks grow hot, but continued her song. She leaned in closer, drawing his face closer to hers. Their foreheads touched, and without breaking eye contact, Ume continued to venture, pulling him closer and closer. Both of them moved in so slowly, Ume gasped, realizing how close their lips were before pulling away. She blushed, unable to look at Leviathan who was conveniently looking the other way.

“T-That was good,” Leviathan broke the silence. “Y-You’d definitely be able to seduce a human.” 

“Thanks,” Ume murmured back quietly. She snuck a glance at him, heart beating quickly at the sight of his flushed face and the sincerity she felt from him. “Do you think… you could come with me to the human realm tomorrow?” She mumbled..

Leviathan finally looked up at her, “What do you mean?”

Ume took a deep breath, “I think… I’m ready to give it a try…” Then she turned and looked at him, “But I was hoping you could be there with me. After practicing with you… It’s made me more comfortable. I was hoping that you could kinda be there as… support?”

Leviathan nodded. Of course he would be there for her.

“You are the best,” Ume gushed with relief lacing her voice. “I’ll see you back here tomorrow and we can swim over together.” Gathering up the courage, Ume swam over and gave Leviathan a soft kiss on his cheek, “Thank you,” she murmured, before diving down and swimming away.

Instinctively, Leviathan reached up and touched the cheek she had kissed. A little dazed by what just happened, Leviathan stayed in place, watching her swim away. A wide smile began to form on his face as the heat began to spread. 

He couldn’t wait for tomorrow to come. 

[mistaeq]

can I request for a josuke x reader oneshot? fluff & angst, it was raining and both of them are in sentimental mode; reminiscing their good times (when they’re both in a relationship) to the end of their break up.. i hope you may blend it with the rain theme (actually inspired by the song “rains again” by solji) thank you🤍☔️

Higashikata Josuke: Rains Again

TW // none

Thank you, thank you and thank you again for this request. I loved writing it, and the song inspired me even more. I suggest y'all read this while listening to the song written in the request, "Rains Again" by EXID's Solji, if you want to get in the right mood to fully appreciate it. Also. It's long. Get ready to cry.

Where Josuke and his s/o meet during a rainy day. Loss of virginity is mentioned, but no worries, there's no nsfw. Fluff and angst, kinda hurt/comfort.

WORD COUNT: 4k

Rain, rain. A rain filled day. I think it'll always be like this for a while. Blankly.

You were all curled up in the bench under the bus stop. You went outside without an umbrella, and all of a sudden, it started raining. The sky started crying again. And again. You knew this feeling. And you hated rain. You hated...

"Shit! This fucking rain... I hate it so much..." a tall figure joined you under that bus stop. He didn't even look at you, he was just focusing on getting the water out of his hair. His precious hair you hated so much. His precious hair you loved so much. "Rain only brought bad stuff into my life... fuck it, fuck it all." he let his bag onto the ground. Then kicked it out of anger.

"It was raining, when I broke up with you." that voice. He'd recognize it between a thousand voices. "Remember, Josuke?" he turned around. His gaze met yours. Your little body all curled up because of the cold wind rain brought with her. He didn't know how to feel about you. Angry? Sad? Maybe sorry? Did he miss you?

"You." he just said. He fetched the bag he had let on the ground, and quietly sat next to you.

"Are you stuck here because the rain, too?" as soon as he approached you that much, you felt nostalgia kicking in. Just stop, you thought. He's been an asshole. Not your fault.

"Yes... well... no, to be precise." he looked like he was about to panic, too. "I just need to wait for my bus back home." was he trying to play it cool or something? His home was pretty close, and it's not that many people in Morioh Cho used the bus. He really hadn't changed, huh. The almighty I-never-make-mistakes Josuke.

Pouring down the rain in my memories of you, maybe i think it also contains good things.

"So... how've you been doing?" you really didn't want to answer that question. You just shrugged, leaning your head against the giant megapixel screen on your right. "Are you gonna ignore me, is that it?" the atmosphere was heart wrenching. You had no guts to face him and meet his gaze twice. You would have cried.

Getting nervous, Josuke accidentally dropped his bag again, this time, his wallet fell off. Right in front of you. You would have stayed still, if you hadn't seen what was in there. You've been fast and picked it up right before he could do that. That receipt. Was he still carrying it around with him?

The day you and Josuke met, the weather forecast said it was meant to be rainy. And it had been. But right before lunchtime, the sun decided to shine over the rain for some minutes. In those minutes, a handsome, kind boy walked in, in your grandma's bakery.

"I'm here because..." he stuttered for a second, when he first saw you, behind the counter. "...b-because my mom ordered some bread... I'm here on her behalf to take it..." you couldn't do or say anything. His gaze had latched onto yours. You stood there, smiling.

"Y/n, what are you... ooh, Josuke! It's you!" hearing you weren't answering to the customer, your grandma came from the back of the bakery, to help. She brought a huge bag of fresh bread, and handed it to him. Josuke, huh?

"Y/n, you know who he is?" despite your grandma talking, your gazes really didn't want to separate. You shook your head. "He's Tomoko Higashikata's son! Josuke!" he had to look somewhere else for a little, he had to pay for the bread. But he smiled, when your grandma introduced him to you. Then finally, he talked again.

"I might want to come here on my mom's behalf some other time..." he then thanked for the bread, took that damned receipt, and winked at you, before leaving.

You breathed. When the sun disappeared after a few minutes and the rain came back, you ran by the bakery's window.

"Grandma..."

"What is it, y/n, dear?"

"Josuke... when he came in, the rain had no power against the sun... maybe... maybe he's my one..."

"Are you in love already, dear?"

"The sky told me..." you believed in the sky.

I think it's raining today, I didn't want to poke you. I'm not really missing you, I just feel a little blue.

"Give it back, what the hell are you thinking about?" he snatched his wallet from your hands. Then took a close look at it and understood. He heard your muffled sniffles, and tried to touch you. "O-Oi, y/n..." you flinched, when he touched your shoulder, and Josuke withdrew his hand.

"You don't have to make me think you care..." you just said. "But if you're still interested in how have I been doing..." you turned right towards him, but your teary eyes still not meeting his. "Bad. I've been doing the worst ever." The look on his face was a mixture of shocked and melancholic. Almost mortified.

You would have never thought the love between you and Josuke could end up to being something like this. Everytime Josuke was with you, the sky was also clear and beautiful. Except when your love was rainy, along with the sky. When you broke up, it was rainy. It was stormy. When you met again, right there on that bench, it was rainy. Because you weren't together.

"Something bad happened?" you just looked at him, at a loss for words. You couldn't understand if he was being an asshole or just too stupid to understand how bad you had felt since your break up. But you knew what he wanted.

He had always acted like this. When he perfectly knew something, but he wanted to hear it from you directly, he'd feign ignorance. That's how you got your first kiss. He was bringing you home, walking right next to you, after a date. You two stopped right in front of your door.

You started swinging a little on your own feet. But you weren't entering that door, standing there smiling like a kid who's just broken something precious and has to soften her parents.

"What is it, y/n?" he smiled back, playing along with you.

"Come on... you know it..." you got closer. "Josuke..."

"I have no clue, what do you mean?" he giggled.

"Are you doing it on purpose? So I have to directly tell you?" you got close enough to get wrapped in his embrace.

"Maybe..." he teased you, moving a stray lock of hair behind your ear. You just needed to take it all off your chest.

"It's been a while since we started dating, and... I feel like I fell in true love with you, Josuke." he was lovingly staring at you, smiling, the same way he did that day at the bakery. "And this was a desperate request for a first kiss."

You stood on tiptoe, when he leaned down, your lips meeting his for a sweet peck. Then two, three, until they turned into a real kiss. His hands cupping your cheeks, and your arms wrapped around his warm torso. You felt so loved and safe. That night the Moon was shining so much you could get blinded by it. Not even a cloud in the sky.

"I love you, Josuke, I love you so much..."

How can I explain this feeling? It's because we were so good back then. That's why I'm feeling a little sad.

"Are you doing it on purpose? So I have to directly tell you?" Josuke looked back, just on the concrete between his feet, as if it became the most interesting thing to watch to avoid your gaze.

"I'm just worrying about how you've been doing."

"No, you're not." your hands were freezing because of the cold wind, so you hid them under your armpits and closed on yourself again. "You're just waiting to hear me cry about how breaking up with you made me feel terribly miserable, just for you to feel a little more relevant."

Josuke couldn't just say anything. Because deep down he knew that maybe he just wanted to hear you say you missed him, that you were lost without him and shit. Because he knew it was true. But he couldn't just accept it. He had to hear it. But also... he really cared about how you had been doing.

He had messed up a lot of stuff with you, and he knew. But it never affected his love. He'd been able to hide it well, but when you left, he was just as desperate as you. He felt miserable and guilty. Terribly guilty.

"Maybe I do want to hear it directly from you." he admitted, swallowing. "But what I've caused doesn't make me feel proud of myself or more relevant someway." he tried to touch you again. You didn't flinch, this time. He was gentle. So gentle. He'd always been. Even when you had bad arguments, even when you broke up, he had never raised or thought to raise a single hand on you.

You got a way to prove his inner and physical tenderness when you felt ready. Yes. You were by your home. You never were by Josuke's house. It was three in the morning, after a date. You were watching a movie, cuddling on the sofa, and then you would have slept together. But that night, you had other plans for him.

"Josuke..." you caught his attention, cupping his cheek with your hand and turning his head towards you.

"I'm here..." he held you closer, and you smiled. He did that for you. He knew you needed him to guarantee you he loved you, every now and then during your date. But it was your turn, to tell him you loved him.

"I feel ready to make love with you."

When I open my eyes with an unpleasant feeling, I know it's gonna be cloudy today, and it'll rain so much.

He gave you the best first time you could ever dream of. You felt pain. Josuke told you it could happen. But it wasn't his fault. He'd been so gentle, you couldn't believe it. Right after that, you had never felt your boyfriend closer than that. He took great care of you, after you finished. Josuke let you sleep on his bare chest, and you could perfectly hear his heartbeat. You loved listening to it.

You couldn't understand why people always talked about sex as something which dirties and ruins you. You felt the complete opposite. As you and Josuke started falling quietly asleep after your first lovemaking, the first ray of sun of the sunrise reminded you how pure your love was. Josuke was the sun that lit up your life. You felt like you did the right thing.

But you should have listened to your grandma, when she told you that nothing could be perfect forever.

In my opened photo album, there's us smiling brightly. It's a little awkward for us.

"Apparently you weren't so proud of being my boyfriend, too..." you commented. Josuke inhaled, to say something, but then he stopped. "Does Tomoko know anything now or did you hide our break up from her too?"

"Come on..." he huffed, but you were irremovable.

"Josuke, does she know?" you saw him pushing his tongue against your right cheek, inside his mouth.

"...No."

"Obviously."

You started doubting of Josuke during a cloudy day. His mom had ordered some fresh bread from the bakery, and you thought he would have appreciated it, if you chose to bring it to him yourself. Morioh Cho wasn't so big, and you quickly found your boyfriend's house thanks to your grandma's directions.

You rang the bell that said "Higashikata", and waited a couple of seconds, before the door opened. Josuke blinked twice. Then went feral.

"What do you think you're doing here?" you got scared, for a second. You did nothing wrong, you just wanted to do him a favor.

"I wanted to see you, so I brought you myself the bread Tomoko ordered..."

"No. Just no." he gently pushed you away from the door. One thing you had to admit. Even when he was angry, he never physically hurt you. "Don't ever do this again. My mom might..."

"Josukeee... who's this cute girl?" A woman's voice caught your attention from inside the house. Tomoko Higashikata was standing right in front of you. You panicked. You felt like you did something wrong, and saw Josuke's forehead wrinkle.

"S-sorry." you managed to say. You gave Josuke the bag full of fresh bread you were holding, and didn't even look Tomoko in her eyes. "I'm just the granddaughter of the bakery's owner. I saw it was about to rain and I thought it would have been kind of me to help the customers with their orders." Josuke was staring at you, taken aback from your words. "Have a good day."

Why would Josuke be ashamed of introducing you to his mom? You tried to think about it in a different way. Maybe he didn't want Tomoko to ask questions about your relationship and wasn't ready yet to introduce you to her? Your boyfriend called you, that night. You asked for forgiveness, and he made you promise you wouldn't have done it again unless you weren't sure his mom wasn't home. The whole day, the sky had been cloudy.

I think it's raining today, I didn't want to poke you. I'm not really missing you, I just feel a little blue.

"Y/n, I would kick myself in my own ass, for what I've done." you giggled a little, for what he said. You sneezed, though. The cold wind the rain brought was about to get you catch a cold. Josuke took off his uniform's big jacket, and wrapped it around your shoulders. "You're gonna catch a cold, y/n."

"Thank you..." you just mumbled. Despite the rain, that jacket still had Josuke's smell on it. You missed it like air. You were about to say something, when your phone rang. It was right next to you leg, on the bench, so Josuke saw it pretty well.

"Okuyasu?" he asked. "Are you friends with my best friend?" you had no intention to answer the phone. Not now, at least. Okuyasu was a sweetheart, and he helped you a lot after your break up. You would have called him back later.

"After that night he got worried and helped me. Or helped us both, I guess... if you cared enough about me to be at least a little sad after our break up." Okuyasu wasn't there, when you two fought and broke up. But you found the courage to confront Josuke thanks to him.

How can I explain this feeling? It's because we were so good back then. That's why I'm feeling a little sad.

You met Okuyasu while you were working in the bakery. You had seen him before, but he had never seen you. Sometimes it seemed to you that Josuke didn't want you two to meet. Or at least he didn't want Okuyasu to see you. But you could totally imagine him being curious about who could Josuke's girlfriend be. And giggled a little with yourself, when you saw him in the bakery.

"What are you up to, Okuyasu?" your grandma seemed to know everyone in Morioh Cho. She was so friendly with every customer. "You don't come here often." The guy smiled.

"I'm going to Josuke's house tonight." you opened your ears. "I'd like to bring something, he's always inviting me by his house and I don't want to seem rude and go there without something for him."

"Also" Okuyasu continued. "Maybe tonight he'll finally tell me who's this special friend of his... you know... he always talks about her, and I'm eager to know more. I hope she's hot, maybe I'll have a chance if she's single." you felt a storm in your chest. Your grandma looked at you, worried. It was happening again. Josuke was hiding your love from other people again.

You soon understood he wasn't afraid his mother would ask questions about you. He was straight up ashamed of you. An awkward silence fell in the bakery.

"Did.... Did I say something wrong?" Okuyasu blushed. You were grateful he was such a chatterbox. He had just told you everything you needed to know about Josuke.

"You won't need to buy anything here, Okuyasu." he looked perplexed. "I'm the friend Josuke talks about. And I've never been so angry in my whole life." he felt his cheeks burn up.

"Is it about what I said about hoping you were hot? S-Sorry, I-..."

"No. It's not about you." you took off the apron you had to wear at work, angrily. "He keeps on telling everyone I'm a good friend of his. Or that I'm just a telemarketer..." you clenched your fists. "As he did when I called him while he was playing dice with Rohan."

"You aren't a friend of his? You hate him?" Okuyasu was so confused.

"I am his girlfriend. And this makes me mad." his jaw fell.

"Woah, is he nuts? If I had a girlfriend like you, I'd tell the whole Morioh Cho in less that five seconds!"

"Please, Okuyasu. Don't show up at Josuke's house today. I will. Tomoko isn't home tonight, is she?" Okuyasu shook his head. "Perfect. And sorry about this."

"No, it's better for you to confront Josuke as soon as possible on this... it's disrespectful of him to behave this way." he gave you his phone number, just in case you needed to talk with someone afterwards, and your grandma let you go home, to get a rest.

Maybe on a rainy day I'll think of you for a long time. The memories of us crying and laughing, really are so beautiful.

Josuke was sitting on the sofa, waiting for Okuyasu. He had already turned the videogames on, and was ready to play with his best friend. Finally, someone knocked at the door. He opened it with a huge smile, but it disappeared as soon as he saw you and your angered expression.

"Y/n? What are you doing here? Okuyasu's gonna be here any minute..." he tried to - gently - push you outside, but you, a little less gently, pushed him aside and entered his house.

"Okuyasu won't show up. I met him in the bakery. Obliviously, he told me everything I needed to know. And I told him not to come here." Josuke closed the door and turned around to face you.

"You're mad."

"I am the mad one? Will you stop telling the people you care about that I'm nobody? All of this is so fucked up..." he sat on the same sofa he was on before, and rested his elbows on his knees, hiding his face on his hands. "Your mom thinks I'm just the girl of the bakery, Okuyasu thought I was a good friend of yours, and even worse, Rohan thinks I'm a telemarketer... are you ashamed of me, Josuke?"

"It's not it..."

"Why else should you be hiding our love from others?" your voice broke, you were about to cry. He felt powerless. Not even Josuke knew what the matter was with himself. He felt coward. But the fact that he was afraid of telling people he had a girlfriend wasn't affecting his love for you. He couldn't find the words to explain it. "Because you do love me... don't you, Josuke..."

It was on his tongue's tip. Yes, I do. Yes, I do, he was thinking. But words won't come out. He did. He did love you. He was truly in love with you. But in that moment, he couldn't connect two neurons and answer.

"Y-Y/n... I..." right in that moment, the loudest thunder you ever heard, was accompanied by a horrible lightning which struck the closest tree to Josuke's house.

You hated rain. You hated storms. Josuke knew. He hadn't been able to clear the sky to you, this time.

"I've seen enough." you let a tear wet your cheek.

Tell her you love her, fucking bastard, just tell her, Josuke was thinking. But it looked like he had lost his voice. You couldn't believe he could let you go without saying anything. His eyes were shocked, his mouth stuck opened, his hands trembling.

"Thank you for the great days you gave me. No one's ever gonna give me such a bright sun again. I love you, Josuke. But I guess I only bring storms into your life." you turned around, and in less than five seconds, Josuke's house's door slammed behind you.

I just feel a little blue, it's not that I want to go back to those times, I'm just feeling out of it and sad the whole day.

"I wish I could have been able to talk to you, that night." Josuke said. "I've been sad, I've been desperate, after you left. I wanted to get over it immediately, because I thought you would have been better, without me... but I found out Crazy Diamond cannot repair a broken heart." the rain began to decrease.

"I still don't know what was up with you..." you answered. "You think you can explain it to me now?"

"The truth is I was just being a coward." he had become a little more talkative. Josuke ran a hand through his hair. They were almost dry. "I was afraid people would have judged me. Or you. And I didn't want this. But the result was the opposite of what I wanted." this was it? He could have just told you everything that night and it would have been okay by now.

You couldn't imagine Josuke had such a mess in his mind. If someone talked shit behind you and him, you wouldn't have cared. But he was afraid this could happen. And you found out after you broke up more than two months ago.

"Josuke..." you were interrupted by a familiar sound. A bus was coming. You felt sad. Did Josuke have to go?

"It looks like my bus is coming." he stood up, then looked at you. "Keep my jacket, or else you'll catch a cold. You'll give it back tomorrow." A sudden ray of sun blinded your left eye, as you widened your eyes.

"Tomorrow...?"

"I'll come to the bakery to take the bread on my mom's behalf. I missed you." you felt your eyes tear up.

"Josuke..." you whispered, again. You approached him, quickly, right before the bus stopped in front of you, and you got wrapped in a tight and warm embrace. You inhaled his sweet smell, enjoyed his strong arms and listened, once again, to his racing heart. "Will I really see you tomorrow?"

"You will. I promise." he gently kissed your forehead, then got on the bus.

I wanna follow this rain and go back to those good days. Once my heart gets there, will you please stay with me?

Once alone, you realized the rain had stopped. A warm, bright sun was shining on you, and you could go back to the bakery. You took off Josuke's jacket from your shoulders, and folded it, walking towards the bakery. You sometimes smelled it, and felt like crying out of happiness.

When you opened the door, your grandma smiled.

"I knew something happened. This sun doesn't come out without a reason." she told you, seeing how desperately happy you looked. "Was it the young Josuke?" you nodded, holding his uniform tighter.

You couldn't see it, because you spent the rest of the afternoon working in the bakery.

But outside, the sky had gifted you the most beautiful rainbow Morioh Cho had ever seen.

[lulu-zodiac]

Peppermint

Summary: Dean shares a Christmas tradition with Cas.

My second piece for @galaxycastiel and @jellydeans Destiel December 2020 challenge, written for day 7′s prompt: “Peppermint”. I had so much fun writing this, and would love to know any thoughts on it as I’m still quite nervous about posting! <3 (Also, if you want to be added to my tag list for fics, pls let me know! If you prefer to read on ao3, you can find it here)

There’s a little red tin in the glove compartment of the impala, and when Cas picks it up, he can feel the way it’s scratched and dented with age.

“What’s this?”

Dean glances over, and something unreadable passes across his face. It reminds Cas of how he looks when Sam talks about their childhood, nostalgic and complicated – not happiness, but something close. “Where’d you find that?”

“It was just in here with your Dad’s old phone, under the map,” Cas replies, turning it over interestedly in his hands. There’s a faded image on the front he can’t quite make out, worn green and silver and gold. The colours of Dean’s eyes, as he looks at Cas in the half-light of the unfolding road. “What is it?”

“It used to have peppermints in it,” Dean says, looking back to the road. There’s a wistful kind of sadness in his gaze, but a slight smile playing across his mouth. “Sammy begged Dad to buy it at some gas station when he was, I don’t know, maybe four. He didn’t even like peppermints, he just liked the Christmas tree on the front of the tin, wouldn’t shut up about it. It was filled with those red and white striped candy canes, you know the ones?”

Cas nods, watches the moving December colours play across Dean’s features.

“Well, that year we were stuck in here all Christmas day while Dad was wrapping up a hunt. Sammy was old enough to know it was Christmas, so it kind of sucked. But I got Sammy singing Christmas songs and we drew stupid snowmen cartoons on the windows, and it was okay, we passed the time. Dad was gone so long we ended up eating most of the candy canes while we were waiting, but Sammy insisted on saving the last one for Dad. He still hero-worshipped Dad at that point, even though Dad was barely a father to him – was barely even there, to see Sammy growing up” Dean breaks off momentarily, shakes his head like he’s trying to surface from deep water. Cas notes the set of Dean’s jaw, the way his knuckles are white around the wheel, resists the urge to reach out, soften them.

“Sam knows how much you did now, Dean,” he says, instead, into the quiet.  

Dean makes a dismissive sound, carries on as though Cas hasn’t spoken at all, but the tension in his hands is less strained; “Anyway, when Dad finally came back that night he was only a little beat up, in a good mood for once. He tried to take us for some real food, but everywhere was closed by that time so we just sat in here together and Dad broke the last candy cane into three for us to share,” Dean glances at the box Cas is still holding. It feels warm in Cas’s hands now, the mental heating up in his palms as he listens to the story, as though it’s slowly coming alive. “It was one of the better Christmases, actually. Dad refilled the box with them each December, handed them out to me and Sammy when we’d been driving all night. It was one of the few traditions we ever had,” he shrugs, adjusts his grip self-consciously on the wheel, “Stupid, really,” he adds, in that way he has of diminishing anything personal he says, “It’s probably empty now.”

Obligingly, Cas opens the box. It is empty, save a couple of crumpled silver wrappers, but it smells of ghostly peppermint. Cas sniffs, imagines little Dean and Sam sitting in the impala alone on Christmas day. His chest aches at the thought of Dean trying to distract Sam, keep him happy and amused while Dean was probably afraid. “I’ve never tried peppermint,” he tells Dean, inhaling again and trying to figure out the scent. It’s sharp, clean, a little powdery. Like dusty snow. “What’s it like?” he asks, curiously.

“Hard to describe to anyone who hasn’t tasted it,” Dean says, “Like most things. It’s – sweet. Kind of makes the inside of your mouth feel cold when you inhale.”

Cas looks at him, watches the lights of the road reflect in his green gaze.

“Hey, we can get some, if you want,” Dean says, nodding towards the road, “There’s a gas station just up ahead, I wouldn’t mind stopping to stretch my legs anyway.”

“I would like that,” Cas smiles at the thought of getting to taste a little piece of Dean’s history, watches as the lights get brighter and the car slows, pulling into the empty gas station.

Outside, it’s cold, the dark biting at Cas’s skin as he waits for Dean to return from the kiosk. He leans against the cool, smooth metal of the impala, stares skywards for a while. It’s cloudy, the sky is swollen with snow. Cas likes not being able to see the heavens, sometimes. On days like this, earth is full enough of wonder all by itself. The greasy spill of gas station lights on frozen concrete, a little metal box of memories in his pocket, Dean’s footsteps echoing through the quiet towards him. The lights of heaven could never compare.

“Here,” Dean’s nose is pink from the cold, eyes bright as he leans back against the car beside Cas, hands him a paper packet. “Peppermint candy canes. Go on, knock yourself out.” He sticks his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket and stares up at the sky, like Cas had been moments before. Cas wonders whether Dean is comforted by the blankness too, or if he aches for the far-distant twinkling lights and their warmth, so long absent from his own life.

“Will you have one too?” Cas asks, peering into the bag and tentatively drawing out one of the striped candies before handing it back to Dean.

“Why not?” Dean’s fingers are warm against Cas’s for a moment, rough with calluses, and then there’s nothing again. He pulls out a candy and stuffs the paper bag into his pocket, begins unwrapping the little umbrella-shaped stick. “I can’t remember the last time I had one of these, you know. Probably the Christmas before Sam went off to college.” He puts the candy between his lips, sucks. Cas suddenly has to catch his breath, cold and startling in his lungs. “Hey, what are you waiting for?” Dean is looking at Cas, lips red and plump around the candy, eyes bright in the cold air.

“Oh,” Cas looks down at his own untouched candy, brings it up to his mouth and sucks experimentally. “It’s like… toothpaste,” he frowns at Dean, letting the cool, clean taste fill his mouth. He sucks again, slower, trying to get a sense of the flavour. “It’s quite nice.”

Dean’s cheeks are pink with the cold now too. “Uh – yeah, it is, I guess.” He’s looking at Cas intently in the muted lights of the deserted gas station, with an expression that is familiar yet unreadable and makes Cas feel warm even in the cold.

“This is what Christmas tasted like to you?” Cas sucks the candy again, looks at Dean.

“Once, I suppose so,” Dean sounds distracted, but his tone doesn’t match the intent focus in his gaze as he looks at Cas. The cold has made his cheeks flush darker still, and the light is muted enough that only an arc of green is visible around the black of his pupils.

“It does make my mouth feel cold,” Cas observes, with interest. He sucks the candy further into his mouth and pulls it out with a pop, feeling the cool cleanness of the air being pulled between his lips. Dean clears his throat slightly. “I haven’t encountered any other food that has this effect,” Cas licks slowly at the tip of the candy, and is aware of Dean inhaling sharply, “Do you know what causes it?”

“I don’t,” Dean’s voice is slightly hoarser than usual.

“Very interesting,” Cas contemplates, licking the tip of the candy again with a swirl of his tongue. Dean makes a stifled sound, and Cas looks up with a frown. “Don’t you want yours?” he asks, eyeing Dean’s uneaten candy, “Or do you only enjoy them when you can eat them with Sam? I’m sorry, I know I can’t provide that part of the tradition for you.”

“Sam isn’t the only person I can have good memories with, Cas. This can be a new tradition, okay?” Dean says, and he’s glowing, so beautiful here in the cold all lit up. “But,” he pauses, swallowing, “You’re right, I’m not sure I want mine.”

“You don’t?” Cas frowns, worriedly. He pulls his own candy away from his mouth.

The colour is high on Dean’s cheeks as he shakes his head, “No. I think I’d rather have yours, actually.” And before Cas can say anything, Dean’s lips are suddenly on his, soft and warm, so warm in the cold air. Cas feels as though he’s been holding his breath for years and is suddenly able to breathe. It’s wonderful, the heat of Dean’s mouth against his, the slick of his tongue twining with Cas’s, tasting of peppermint and making something hot curl deep in Cas’s stomach. His hands are cupping Cas’s face, rough skin, tender touch. Cas is breathing hard when Dean pulls back, both of their breath clouding the December air between them. “Tastes better on you,” Dean grins, and it’s a beautiful thing, tentative and free here in the cold without heaven watching.

Cas reaches out and grabs the lapels of Dean’s leather jacket, pulls him in again. This time it’s harder, urgent, Dean’s breath coming in stifled gasps into Cas’s mouth as Cas presses him back against the impala, sinks into the heat of Dean’s mouth, the warm, hard line of Dean’s body, pliant under him. He can taste the desperation on Dean’s tongue along with the peppermint, and he chases it, deepening the kiss until Dean is groaning against him, clutching at Cas’s coat. Cas thinks he might be making noises too, but he can’t think about anything except Dean, here at last in all the ways he should be, warm and real. Oblivion.

In his coat pocket, he can feel the outline of the little peppermint tin where their heartbeats edge closer to each other. He smiles against Dean’s mouth, loves that he’ll never be able to taste peppermint without remembering this; the shine of Dean’s eyes in the muted December lights, the heat of their bodies pressed together, the sky frozen and empty overhead, a blank canvas for their own stars.

[dirt-cup-draco]

Fred Weasley x Reader- Better To Have Loved and Lost Part 2/2

Previously:

I really do love you Fred. You thought and hoped some part of him would feel comforted as you prayed he came to understand what he meant to you.

It was better to have loved and lost Fred Weasley than to have continued to love him and been the cause for his misery.

The war had been won and it was cause for much relief but as you wiped the tables at the Leaky Cauldron you pondered over why you still couldn’t smile right, why the laughs that spilled past your lips were cold and haughty, why when you went home to Ian, it still didn’t feel like home. 

You knew the answer but refused to see it, refused to let yourself feel the fury and the loss that came from following your parents’ every wish. They’d been delighted when your sister had introduced you to Ian once the war ended. Turns out the both of you had been helping rebuild Hogwarts and you just hadn’t been lucky enough to run into each other. 

He was sweet and you didn’t mind his attention but it all felt wrong even if there was hardly a bad thing you could say about him. Your sister could have, and you were surprised she hadnt, picked far worse for you. You only wished that she didn’t feel the need to. You’d been happy with what you had, four months of bliss with the redhead who still had your heart, and now you were forced to live a life you resented. 

Ian was much like you, his family ruled his life. You were both the worst sort of coward. In some ways, it made you feel close to him. You had found a friend, at the very least. You told yourself to just be happy with that. 

Working in Diagon Alley made it very hard to be happy with that. 

You saw Fred and George Weasley in their shop but thankfully hadn’t run into them yet at the pub in which you worked, the very entrance to Diagon Alley. It was a godsend their home was above the shop and you wouldn’t have to see them come and go past your door. Despite being removed from their lives, you kept what tabs you could, especially after the war. 

You’d seen Fred with a white sheet tucked over him, the sheet bloodied over his leg and dried blood at his temple. He’d been gone for a moment, George had said. They thought they’d lost him, they almost had. You were lucky to see him only sleeping and healing from his wounds. You’d made George promise that he’d never seen you there. One look at the pain in your eyes and George had nodded and let you go.

Now, you wished you would’ve stayed. You wanted to have held Fred’s hand until he woke and then you wanted to apologize for every lie you’d ever told him. Even now you found it hard to restrain yourself from heading to number 93 diagon alley and running into their shop only to fall to your knees and beg he understood why you lied and left him. 

“Your shift ended ten minutes ago,” A gruff voice came from behind you and you shook yourself from you thoughts, looked to your boss, took your pay for the day, and then exited into the cool air of night. You could just as easily apparate home but you much preferred to walk. You liked to give yourself time to just be you. You didn’t have to pretend you and Ian were in love, you didn’t have to pretend you were happy with your life, you didn’t have to pretend that you weren’t in love with Fred Weasley. 

You let a few tears fall but not enough to cause your eyes to grow puffy or your cheeks to become red. Ian had seen you cry enough as you both lamented on how you didn’t know how to leave one another when both of your families expected marriage, kids, happiness with each other. You didn’t want to make him feel like it was his fault, because you knew you made him just as miserable. 

He wouldn’t expect you until late. 

As you walked past the shop, you noticed that the main lights had been turned out but a few stayed lit on the inside as the twins walked around to catalog their product, clean up whatever mess had been made under the feet of children and adults alike, and then retire to their apartment upstairs. Only a small amount of shame burned in your veins as you took a seat that was cloaked in the shadow of night to watch the boys get to work. George was wearing an orange blazer and Fred had on a purple vest that fit him perfectly. 

“She’s out there again,” George sing-songed to his twin as he looked from the corner of his eye to see your familiar profile leaning sitting on the curb across from their shop. It was cute that you thought the night alone was enough to hide you. 

“Doesn’t matter,” Fred grunted, frown etched deeply into this features as George tried to get a rise from him. “She never comes in, don’t even know why she-” 

“You know why Y/N sits out there,” George stated and Fred wanted to believe that George was right but it was hard to with those four words constantly bouncing around in his head. I don’t love you. 

“She-” 

“Bloody hell, you can say her name at least,” George scolded and Fred whirled around to meet his brother’s eye, stomping the ground with his cane. 

“No! She made her choice and if she wants to right it then she has to take the first step. I wont say her blasted name until she gets the guts to tell me why she did it. I can’t love her if she’s always going to be under her family’s thumb and I’m sure I’ll hear about wedding invitations for her and that skinny bloke before I hear an explanation,” 

“I think she wanted to when you were hurt- apologize and explain I mean,” 

George was a good man and so for your sake he hadn’t told Fred immediately but Fred was his other half and neither of them kept the habit of keeping things from one another. Fred had been sulking in his bed one evening after finding an old necklace of yours mixed in with his things and he wasn’t even sure how the damn thing had managed to come with him from Hogwarts and stay tucked out of sight until he’d stumbled upon it. 

It had thrown Fred for a loop and he’d silently cried into his firewhisky for nearly an hour before George had taken the thin chain from his brother’s hands and told him that you had never stopped loving him. Of course, you hadn’t told George that, but he could tell from the way you went pale at the sight of Fred unmoving. Fred had only been sleeping but the fear on your face had been palpable and heartbreaking. 

It had helped ease the pain then but George knew now that Fred was waiting for something to prove that it wasn’t a lie, that you did still love him, that you’d been made somehow to leave him heartbroken. 

“She’s leaving,” George sighed, nodding his head towards your back as you began to move towards your home which was another twenty minutes walk away. 

“Good,” Fred hissed but as he looked after you he saw the heavy slump of your shoulders and the way your hair was falling loose from your ponytail and George say his twin’s gaze soften and melt. 

“If you dont go and talk to her I’m going to bring her in here,” 

“What? Hey!” Fred began to argue as George decided to take matters into his own hands if neither of you would. Fred had gotten quick enough with the use of his cane and he grabbed George’s arm to stop him from pushing open the door but his younger twin used this to his advantage and opened the door after pushing Fred against it.

“You git!” Fred hollered at the door, George now safely tucked inside with a smug grin. Fred went to grab his wand to unlock the door but George’s grin only grew wider as he waved Fred’s wand at him from behind the locked glass doors. “Let me in!” 

Fred’s voice ricocheted off the buildings and you weren’t so far that you couldn’t hear the voice that you had missed dearly. It was a bit deeper now but you could still tell that it was his. You were frozen, feet paused on the cobblestone as Fred yelled at George. Why had George locked him out? You turned to watch as Fred shoved his shoulder against the door but with a sigh and a swing of his cane that did nothing to change George’s mind, Fred stopped yelling and stopped trying to get back in.

Fred looked down the street and found you were watching. 

“He won’t let me in until I talk to you, you know,” Fred raised his voice just so you could hear him. You weren’t far but he couldn’t see the details of your face, couldn’t see what color shirt you had on under your jacket. Far enough that his voice didn’t quiver like he feared it would as he spoke his first words to you in years. 

Your cheeks grew hot with embarrassment. Of course the both of them had seen you all the nights you’d spent as they’d closed up their shop. You hadn’t tried to stay hidden but you had hoped that a stranger on the street would escape their notice. 

Your voice was caught in your throat but you took a step towards Fred, then two. Then you were arms length away from him and you felt like you couldn’t breathe. “He’s a git,” You finally achieved in speaking and Fred let out a bark of laughter. 

“Years we haven’t talked and the first thing you say is an insult to my favorite person on the planet,” Fred chuckled, shaking his head good-naturedly when a sudden look of worry flashed on your face. “No, I suppose you’re right he is a bit of a git,” 

“Didn’t mean to get you kicked out of the shop,” 

“He was tired of me never saying anything when you....visit.” Fred decided on. Were you visiting? Watching? He wasn’t quite sure what your intentions were when you sat outside but he hoped it meant you missed him like he missed you. 

“Fred I-” 

“Did you know I found a necklace of yours a couple months ago? Somehow it’d gotten tangled on the thread of an old shirt of mine and I just stumbled upon it looking through my closet... Was a bit of a wreck after that. Must’ve been so pitiful because Georgie told me something I don’t think he was supposed to,” 

“O-oh?” You squeaked, eyes growing wide with curiosity and a bit of fear. You still couldn’t read Fred. Was he upset? Was he sad? Or was he completely over it all? You weren’t sure how you’d feel if he had moved on completely. You prayed that what he had felt months ago finding your necklace was still present within his heart. 

“Told me when I was sleeping after I’d been hurt that you’d come ‘round and just sat with me for a second before he’d come over. Said you didn’t want me knowing you’d been there. Why didn’t you want me knowing?” 

His voice had become strained and his honey brown eyes followed your every move as you fidgeted in place, all the color vanished from your face. 

“Didn’t think it would matter to you if I had been there or not, so why confuse you with the news that I had been there and scared to death that you were gone?” You choked out, thinking of Fred no longer being here to live and laugh and bring those things to other people was impossible to bear. 

“I’ve been confused since the day you left me, Y/N,” Fred winced as your name rolled past his lips and you hated that you could see heartbreak in every line of his face and the slope of his lips. 

“Was for your own good Freddie,” You said and you still believed it. “Still is, I know things are different after the war but my family is still- Well my mum and sister are still in control and I can’t-” 

“Yeah, right,” Fred scoffed bitterly but let his eyes soften as he realized your father must have passed in the battle. “You can’t do anything without their permission. How's that going by the way? Does that poor guy you got strapped with realize you don’t love him? Does he even love you? Great way to live, Y/N,” 

“You’ve got a lot of nerve Fred Weasley,” You sniffled, the venom in his words bringing tears to your eyes. “If I didn’t leave you, Emily would’ve destroyed your reputation, destroyed any chance of the two of you and George ever having this shop and destroyed you and I in the process. She’s not the most powerful witch but she’s got my mom’s money lining her pockets and enough of it to convince other people to listen to what she says. I left so you could live out your dream,” 

“What about now? I’ve got the life I want and I’m not scared of your family, so why are you? Don’t you realize we could have figured something out together?” 

“I just...things can’t be different,” 

Fred watched you and he felt his stomach turn to steel. You truly believed nothing could ever change. He shook his head sadly, grounding his cane against the pebbles beneath his feet when his leg grew tired. His knuckles were white and hands cold. How long had you two been out here? Nothing had been solved and when Fred looked at you he felt like nothing ever could be. You’d given up. 

“I want to love you Y/N, I do love you,” Fred admitted, watching your breath catch in your throat. “But when I look at you, I don’t see the girl I fell in love with. I-If I thought that you could leave what-his-name-”

“Ian,” You supplied for no reason other than to keep your tears at bay. 

“If I thought that you could leave Ian and defy your mum, I’d ask you to be mine right away.” 

“Why do you think that I can’t?” You wanted to reach out to him, to tell him you could figure out something, but the pit in the bottom of your gut was telling you otherwise. Even now you were scared of your family. 

“You know why. Or should I ask you to be mine?” 

“I am yours,” You chewed on your lip, unable to meet his eyes as you spoke the truth. “Never stopped being yours, but-” 

Fred scoffed. “Exactly... It’s always going to be something Y/N. I miss you and trust me I do love you but if you can’t promise that you aren’t going to spook at the first sign of trouble from your family then I don’t think we can be together again,” 

“What if I lied to them?” You begged, finally getting enough courage to grab Fred’s arm and you felt your stomach flip as you caught scent of his cologne. He hadn’t changed it since school. 

“I deserve more than that,” Fred sighed. “I can’t be a secret, Y/N. And I know it wouldn’t be everyone but what does that lie mean? Does that lie mean you’ll stay with Ian and I’ll just be a late night call after you’re done with work? Does it mean I’ll only go to your place when he’s gone? I can’t be that for you,” 

“Y-you’re right,” You sighed and Fred felt his heart break all over again. You wouldn’t change, not even for him. 

“Goodbye Y/N,” 

And with that, he was shuffling back into his shop, the door having been unlocked the second Fred had turned away from it. 

Not trying to hide your tears this time, you apparated home and when Ian caught your eye, he didn’t ask. You locked yourself in your bedroom and didn’t come out. 

--

 “It’s too bloody early for this,” Fred grumbled, head pounding and eyes burning as he shuffled from his bed to his apartment’s door. Neither of the twins usually got visitors past the lobby of the shop so he was surprised when a rapid knocking had rung out while he’d been sulking in his arm chair. 

George had awarded him the day off with a, “Get back in bed, you’ll scare off a;; the customers today and I don’t feel like losing the money.” Fred was thankful for it after he’d spent the previous day in bed after he’d spoken with you. Why hadn’t he been enough for you? 

His scowl was ready on his face when he flung the door open. You stood there with a bashful smile and without a second thought, Fred slammed the door closed.

“Haven’t you done enough damage?” Fred asked through the wood. 

“George let me up,” You called back. 

“Doesn’t mean I want to see you,” He shot back and your heart lurched uncomfortably. 

“What if I told you you wouldnt be a secret? That I spent the last two days removing myself from my family and moving to a different flat? That I’m a coward and a fool but I know better now and I don’t ever want to let you go again, if you’ll have me....” 

“I’d say that’s a bit quick,” Fred mumbled, eyebrows knit together as he opened the door back and you let out a breath of relief. He was listening at least. 

“Been wanting to leave them for ages, been ready to just vanish at the drop of a hat but I never had the courage and I didn’t think I had it but you’re right and I’m not living much of a life. I’m tired of being their puppet and I’m tired of breaking the heart of someone I only want to make happy,” 

“Don’t say it if you don’t mean it,” 

You hated seeing Fred so guarded but you knew he had more than enough reasons to be. You’d been terrible to him and made him believe that he couldn’t believe a word you said. The lies were over now. 

“I love you Fred Weasley and I left once to protect your future but now I’m back and asking you to let me protect your heart,” 

When Fred wrapped his arms around you and held tight, you squeezed back just as ferociously. Never again would you make him feel like you didn’t love him with everything within you. If your mother and sister tried to ruin your happiness, you would have him by your side to fight back. 

You finally felt at home.

[crepuscularqueens]

am i going to make another playlist breakdown that no one asked for... yes :) for samsteve :)

now - paramore (boy i could talk about this one forever it’s so on the nose of the whole them of it all! their energy is truly captured here!) feels like i'm waking from the dead and everyone's been waiting on me, least now i'll never have to wonder what it's like to sleep a year away / instead, i'd have some memories for the days i don't feel anything, at the least they will remind me not to make the same mistakes again / there's a time and a place to die and this ain't it

glory - bastille (oh god oh GOD. these two could have really had it all couldn’t they?? every single line could make me go bonkers from it) as we fell and hit our heads upon the curb, you make me laugh until i die, can you think of any better way to choke? / not everything had gone to plan but we made the best of what we had, you know? / and then you put your hand in mine and pulled me back from things divine, stop looking up for heaven waiting to be buried

homemade dynamite - lorde (you may know my thoughts on this one already! ah! but when they first meet and they both kinda lose it a bit for each other! steve needing to pass sam like 3 times then go and make his point again! sam harboring steve as a known fugitive when he just met the guy! wow okay!) a couple rebel top gun pilots flying with nowhere to be, don't know you super well but i think that you might be the same as me, behave abnormally / know i think you're awesome, right?

kindred - rationale (what can i say i have a giant weak spot for the bittersweet!)  we are kindred, tugging on the tether, like we'll live forever but one day we'll have to leave. i give thanks for each day of solid ground beneath our feet, but there are no promises for tomorrow for you and me / baby we risk it all just to fall like dominoes, baby all we have is good intentions, fine line in your memories, you’re not alone and you’ll never be, remember that we're both in this together

under the table - fiona apple (okay this pick is somewhat tongue in cheek because they are both insufferable smartasses who sometimes say things they shouldn’t. im thinking... “so you like cats” “sam.” “what?!?!?!?!”. like, this is just for fun) you know i don't go for those ones that you bother about, so when they say something that makes me start to simmer, that fancy wine won't put this fire out, oh kick me under the table all you want i won't shut up, i won't shut up

sudden desire - hayley williams (for the... well... you know) take the elephant by the hand and hold it, it's cruel to tame a thing that don't know its strength. but better to walk beside it than underneath. my kind companion, softened stone, my gentle giant, painful reminder

black moon rising - black pumas (we have to introduce a little heartbreak eventually. i know i did but yeah. we unfortunately know how this ends!) shoot me down and break my heart, it's the black moon rising. you brave the sight, i paint the picture of the black moon rising

lose my mind - kaye (okay but “i might just burn up my whole life”??? yeah that’s them alright. that’s them.) you're trouble, aren't you? i can see it, know you're gonna leave me bleeding, but you set alive every inch of my spine / i might just burn up my whole life, we don't have to be civilized / forget your loyalties to float in my gaze, we look good in destruction, couldn't we trust it? (all of that just SCREAMS them!)

fly me to the moon - frank sinatra (okay, so maybe i added this to my playlist for them immediately after watching ep 1 of tfatws. you have no proof.) you are all i long for, all I worship and adore. in other words, please be true. in other words, in other words, i love you

black sun - death cab for cutie (sometimes we just get very very bitter towards endgame steve. i don’t know that man.) how could something so fair be so cruel, when this black sun revolved around you? / there is a role of a lifetime, and there's a song yet to be sung, and there's a dumpster in the driveway of all the plans that came undone

demons - the national (you know how it is with me and the national. image of me violently shoving this song at steve rogers and glaring at him.) when i think of you in the city, the sight of you among the sights, i get the sudden sinking feeling of a man about to fly / can i stay here? i can sleep on the floor, paint the blood and hang the palms on the door, i do not think i'm going places anymore, i wanna see the sun come up above new york / i do not know what's wrong with me, the sour is in the cut. when i walk into a room, i do not light it up, fuck

the living - san fermin (trying to put into words why this song is so perfect for them is... hm. life’s for the living, you know?) i hear it coming, it’s coming this way, it’s digging me up, the dead have been raised / and it’s hard to quite describe it, like we're part of, part of something bigger

drive desperate - cold war kids (asking someone to follow you... desperately needing their approval) follow me will you? follow me will you? follow me down until, i will admire, oh i need someone who will / to find the words that lift me high i’d tear a hole up in the sky, i’d beg for your approval just to know i’m on the right course

estate sale sign - the mountain goats (okay! bitterly remembering when you shared a path with someone! when everything you had gone through and everyone you lost along the way meant everything in the world and then you feel so all alone in all those memories because they made their choice to give it all up!) some guy in an impala shakes his head when he rides by, but i remember when we shared a vision, you and i / the sacrificial stains all spreading out and soaking through, but i remember when we kept it pretty, me and you / try to see if secrets burn when you hold them up into the light, i remember when we loved each other day and night / every martyr in this jungle is gonna get his wish

end of the earth - marina (i got in my damn feelings for this one boys) love can never be what you want it to be, but i'd still follow you down / if we're torn apart, then i won't let go, cause wherever we are, it feels like home

heat waves - glass animals (furiously shaking endg*me by the shoulders screaming “make it make sense”) usually i put somethin' on tv so we never think about you and me, but today i see our reflections clearly in hollywood, layin on the screen. you just need a better life than this, you need somethin i can never give / i just wish that i could give you that, that look that's perfectly un-sad

deliverance - rationale (im aware this is getting repetitive) you sold me a dream, now i'm hanging on for my life, out of sight, out of mind / it's hard to believe that i don't mean nothing to you and i'll never back in your favor and back in your arms

emergence exit - freelance whales you would've been better alone without my love, you would've been safe from storms

[lemonietrinket]

Jigsaw Puzzle ||| Ending Five - Xiaojun

Summary: Xiaojun x Reader Genre: Fluff basically Warning(s): A big nail, no one is put in danger but vague inferences to what damage a crooked unattended nail could do, some foul language (1x f**k) Word Count: 2701 Theme Song: Home - JBJ95 AN: Xiaojunnie’s ending for my masterpiece Love—I recommend reading it first (it’s worth it, even if it is a bit sad the cuddling is great and so is the emotional support and just. hell yeah)

~~~

Skipping into the kitchen, a grin immediately rose to your face as you caught sight of the hunched figure outside in the garden. Even with his back turned on the window it was clear who it was, and after your encounter last week, you knew exactly what he was doing. 

Letting temptation win you decided to ignore the task you’d been sent to complete (it didn’t matter much, Ten had legs and could totally get up and fetch his own food) and join Xiaojun outside. And so you grabbed the first jacket you could find—there was no doubt it was Kun’s going by the fresh scent upon the collar—slipped on your shoes and headed outside.  

It was a grey day, the wind whipping up wildly one second to then disappearing into silence the next. It had an iciness to it that plunged into your skin where the jacket didn’t protect, and you shivered a hum as you pushed through the gate into the garden.

Xiaojun heard the creak of the iron lock and threw a glance over his shoulder. Seeing it was you he got to his feet. “Oh, Y/N, hi!”

“Hey,” you chirped over the sudden buffer of the wind, “are you... doing what I think you’re doing?” 

He chuckled sheepishly before taking a step to the side, revealing a plastic pet bowl. “Yeah, you got me. Red handed.” He put his hands up in faux surrender.

Reaching the grass and coming to his side you bent down, mimicking what he’d been doing earlier. “So, what we got here, sonny boy.”

You heard him scoff and blinking up into the bright grey of the clouds you eventually caught sight of his dark eyes staring off at the fence at the bottom of the garden. Enraptured by his beauty that shone like the moon in the night no matter the angle, you very nearly forgot to breathe. The way his lips pursed into a coy smile was so distracting, and you only managed to save yourself when he rubbed his nose to combat the cold, the tip blushed as if smudged with light lipstick. That gave you ideas no less. 

He crouched down beside you, shuffling away slightly to give you space from him—as if that was what you wanted at all—and thumbed the rim of the blue plastic. “Well, Officer, we got a bad case of broken plastic here.” He indicated to the clear jagged edge that was extremely hard to miss.

“Yikes,” you mumbled, “what happened?”

“You know the storm last night?”

You nodded, before your eyes widened when Xiaojun retrieved a large crooked nail from the grass by his foot. “Yo what the fuck?”

“Found it sticking out of the woodwork of the fence down there,” he gestured vaguely, his gaze focused intently on the rusty iron, “you’ve got to give it to Mother Nature, it was a bullseye.”

Mouth agape in disbelief at how the wind had managed to achieve that feat you frowned at the cut plastic. It looked old so you supposed it was no surprise it would splinter so easily. Nevertheless it seemed so freak. Unnerved by how long and wide the nail was, with its etched sharp point, your voice wavered. “How long had that been down there?”

He shrugged, finally raising his eyes to meet yours. You watched as they softened and he placed the nail on the patio concrete where it could be easily spotted. “It’s ok, I’ll get rid of it today.”

You nodded a thank you. “So... what were you trying to do to the bowl? It’s clearly a goner.”

“Trying to fix it,” Xiaojun answered simply. When you offered him a quizzical look, he procured a roll of sellotape. There was a twisted strand that hung over the side, sticky side folded over on itself and encasing several shards of plastic. When your face didn’t change a single bit he chuckled sheepishly. “The wind isn’t... quite on my side.”

“Couldn’t you have done that inside?”

He stared at you silently. “Yes, that would be the smart way of doing it b-but...” he scrambled for the words, “I thought it was going to be a quick job!” he exhaled while pulling his coat collar closer to his neck. “I was just wrong.”

“Clearly the brain cell wasn’t bestowed to you today,” you muttered through a stifled snicker, just loud enough for him to hear.

“Hey!”

You met his gaze then, a small smirk on your lips that flickering out as soon as you took him in once again. His pout left your heart racing and heat ros ot your cheeks to greet the caress of his dancing eyes. You quickly changed the subject, clearing your throat and ducking your head back down to the grass, fingers picking at the blades. “So... what are you going to do about it?”

You felt his stare flutter across your cheeks before quickly darting away to where the nail rested. He spoke while he scooped it up, “Guess I’d better go buy a new one.”

“Well, I’ll come with you!” you chirped, perhaps a little too quickly for your own good. “Keep you company and make sure you don’t get lost, you know.”

“That brain cell is missing after all isn’t it,” he said, soft smile sending your heart reeling before he stood up, gaze back to avoiding yours. Perhaps he hadn’t noticed after all. Perhaps that too wasn’t for your own good either. 

᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃

Hands tucked in your pockets to protect them against the brash wind, you found yourself stumbling over an uneven slab in the pavement that you were walking down towards the pet store. 

Eight times, you had counted, that your elbow had brushed his. 

And unlike you, he hadn’t faltered in his step nor words once as he gently rambled to you, the words spilling from his lips bitten by the cold and his own tension. He often did this, on the rare occasions that it was just the two of you. He never spoke with an urgency, but it always dawned upon you afterwards just how far his thoughts went when he was with you—the topic he began on was never anywhere near the one that he finished with. You figured he just needed to vent, as maybe the others didn’t help him come to terms with some of his problems as much as he needed, or they were the problems (which seldom surprised you), and so you never interrupted him. You instead found yourself just silently listening to him, not thinking ill of it once, because you were spending time with him and that was enough. Also his voice had a knack for helping you just relax, it was so soft and peaceful, you were pretty sure you could fall asleep to it.

However, this time was like no other, as you discovered when you could barely listen to him at all. Dipping in and out of the sun-dappled mist of daydreams, called by his voice and his small glances to you, tipped with the crests of smiles, it was no surprise you found it extremely difficult to focus, even as the crowds increased as you reached the main road. 

“It’s not far now,” Xiaojun announced once his ramblings had met a natural pause.

You didn’t respond, not grounded enough to get your vocal chords working in time. Besides, the chatter of the throngs of people was likely enough to swallow anything you said whole.

Forced by the sudden onslaught of strangers heading towards you, Xiaojun shuffled close to you so to allow more pavement for them.

Nine.

He came to walk slightly behind you, his presence offering a surprising sense of comfort as you continued on, the shining sign of the shop peaking through the swathes of silhouettes. Focusing on its retro-inspired neon cursive, you found the weightlessness subside. 

Thanks to the lack of a constant reminder of the man you had fallen ever so hopelessly for being right at your side, by the time you reached the store, you had managed to get your voice working once again.

Warm air washing over you harshly, you quickly shed your coat at the discomfort as soon as you entered. Xiaojun only then stood beside you once again, coaxing the two of you to begin searching for the bowls. 

“Should probably get a heavier one,” he mused, so quiet you could convince yourself he wasn’t talking to anyone at all, even you.

“Sounds good.”

He led the way, sharp eyes narrowed as he scoured the aisles for the distinctive bright colours he was after. The shop itself was pretty quiet, since it was so small and people were beginning to head home for dinner.  Regarding the endless walls of biscuits, treats, toys, scratching posts, beds and whatnot you were baffled by how the food bowls were nowhere to be found. That was, until you turned the corner into the leftmost aisle and spotted them instantly.

“Junnie!” you called, bobbing down to get a closer look at the plastic on the bottom shelf. You were pretty sure they were dog bowls, but you didn’t see the harm in using it for a tiny hedgehog—especially since these looked much more robust and less likely to crack when thrown into a nail.

Picking up a red one you were surprised about how light it was, and at the word ‘DOG’ written bluntly in a rather aggressive font along its side. Grimacing you put it back and began turning the others along the shelf to see what they had written along it.

PUPPY.

ROVER.

#1 DOG.

You sighed, dismayed. It wasn’t the end of the world, giving a hedgehog a bowl with ‘dog’ emblazoned on the plastic of course, but it did feel a bit wrong. Especially when there was a high chance you could do better. Unless Xiaojun had miraculously named the hedgehog something dog-related. 

That was when it hit you. You had no idea what he had called her. 

Standing with a frown it was as if you had summoned him from the earth, as Xiaojun popped up from round the corner. His eyes brightened as soon as they rested upon you, though you wrote it off as being relieved to have finally found what you’d come all this way for. “Ah! Anything good?”

You barely registered his question, instead entirely leading with your own. “Junnie, what did you call the hedgehog?”

It was a seemingly innocuous question. And yet as soon as you looked back fro glancing at the shelves again, you watched as his voice got stuck in his throat.

“Xiaojun?” you enquired carefully.

Before you could enquire if he was ok, he coughed rather awkwardly as if he were a cartoon clearing his throat. “Sorry,” he managed, “I called her... Hedgehog?” 

He was quite unlucky in that sense—the questioning intonation was slight but you caught in nonetheless, a consequence of your habit of hanging off his every word (when you weren’t too overwhelmed by his gorgeous features).

Bemused, you chuckled. “Hedgehog? You called her Hedgehog? How imaginative...”

“Why do you ask?”

Mildly startled by his sudden enquiry, your eyes widened before you could stop them. “Oh, the bowls... they have like dog-related stuff on them. Like ‘Rover,’” you pointed vaguely before focusing entirely on him once again, “but you didn’t call the hedgehog Rover, which would’ve been kinda funny because irony. Nope, you called her Hedgehog—honestly, Xiaojunnn,” you whined, turning to skim over the china bowls instead, “I thought you were more imaginative than that...!”

Meanwhile, Xiaojun was sweating internally. And externally too, most likely, not that he was really in the state to check. Truth be told he had been a little bit more imaginative than that, but there was also no way to tell you that, without admitting every little thing that he had hidden from you. All those gazes, accidental touches, rogue thoughts and near confessions, all out in one go. A board of jigsaw pieces so unclear, yet only needing one final piece to reveal the finished, Schrödinger’s image. He was one move away from perhaps achieving his dreams or unveiling heartbreak. 

And that terrified him. Despite being confronted with a thousand pieces of evidence as to why it would be the former, he would never quite believe it with his whole heart. He’d entertained the possibility for too long in his head for it to ever wholly sink into his mind that it could be real.  But he didn’t want to lie to you anymore. They may have only been small but he didn’t like how they hung over him, like the crystals of a chandelier strung too low and seconds from snapping. And he certainly didn’t want to make any more.  But that meant confessing.

“—Do you think of Cactus, Xiaojun? Prickles? No that’s bad... Zen?”

Catching your eyes peering over your shoulder expectantly at him, he took a deep breath. “You know what is a good name?”

You hummed, shuffling back along the aisle to hear his answer. 

“Y/N,” he finally continued, voice very nearly wavering.

“Yeah?” 

He swallowed. “No, I mean... Y/N is a good name.”

He could see the cogs of thought twisting behind your eyes, before the cute smile he had come to know well and love appeared, highlighted. “Thank you, b-but you can’t name the hedgehog after me.”

“Uhh, yeah, it’s...” he sighed, gathering his strength, “it’s a bit late for that.”

Your voice was dead serious. “What.”

The whole situation had caught you off guard. Never in your wildest dreams had you thought he had named the spiky little creature after you. You figured that if he had been hiding something, it was that he had named her something embarrassing like ‘Sugar-Plum’ or ‘Marshmallow’. But you? He took one look at the prickly animal, that was known for being loud and far from cuddly, and named it after you? You had to admit you weren’t exactly endeared.

However, in a seconds he changed your mind. 

“Y/N, listen,” he began, panic etched across his face as he ran his hand through his hair, “I... named her after you because I... I love hedgehogs. A lot. I think they’re adorable and want to hold them even if they look spiky on the outside. So when I found that one visiting regularly and I couldn’t think of a name, I just... named her after you because it made sense at the time. I didn’t think that far ahead, after all I never thought I had a chance with you anyway, so I figured it would be...”

Once he had trailed off you didn’t speak up to fill the silence, and ended up just staring at him. He was nervous, and you had been so swept up in your own thoughts that putting his together as they tumbled from him had become a nightmare but you were almost certain that he had in essence, said what you had long hoped to hear in some shape or form.

“Was that... a confession?” you gradually eased.

He looked around dazedly. “I think so, yeah.”

A smile teased at the corner of your lips. “You named her after me because you love hedgehogs, and you love... me...?”

After a moment of coming to terms with the simpler version, he nodded.

If he had tried to backtrack out of fear, he wouldn’t have had the chance to, because as soon as the relief washed across your shoulders and the excitement burst in your heart, he found you in his arms. You fit together perfectly, as the weight of reality settled in to encompass you both.

Your hair was soft at his neck even after being blustered by the wind and the sound of your elated laughter lit his skin ablaze. He found himself smiling uncontrollably at what he finally had in the palms of his hands—the coalescence of his love and dreams and future all in one. Cradling you against his chest he finally felt that jigsaw finally come together, to reveal the final image. One of tender care and affection, and a longing now fulfilled. 

~~~

AN: I got another one done! after all this stalling again, again, im sorry !!!!

i love hedgehogs. we had one near our house at the beginning of the quarantine and it was so cute. i fed it dry cat biscuits and it snuffled so loud and then ate all of it and im just happy knowing my life is not completely worthless bc i fed the good boi

pls do not question me on where they live. its a house, yes they all live together and yn lives with them. yup theyve got a garden. its not an overly big house. why? bc why not 

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