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skania · 5 months ago

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OnK Chapter 151

Me two weeks ago:

Me reading this chapter:

The fact that Aka did parallel Chapter 30 makes me feel like we're definitely going to see some Tokyo Blade & Private parallels as the anime covers those arcs. For the better or for the worse.

But we'll get there in due time. For now, time to laugh at the writing again 😂

I have to hand it to Aka. I mentioned that last chapter highlighted like half the reasons why I find romantic Aqua/Kana so poorly written, and this chapter right here did a fine job at highlighting the rest 😂

I want to be an actress! Well... Aqua wants me to be an idol and it may not be so bad actually, I want to be Aqua's Oshi no Ko! Aqua is ignoring me! Being an idol sucks, I quit! I'm going to be a great actress! I may have a chance with Aqua actually. I just want to be his Oshi no Ko!

It's wild to me that Aka had Kana say that her current dream is just to be Aqua's Oshi no Ko. Absolutely wild. This girl was so desperate to become a well-known actress that she was willing to be casting-couched for it, yet suddenly now it's actually it's fine that I peaked when I was five tee hee!

She's obviously lying to herself and settling for the level she is in now because she thinks that reaching that level of notoriety is out of her reach, but...

Not gonna lie, as someone who has seen Akane be called everything from obsessed to emotionally dependant to simp, it is hilarious to witness Kana's writing right now.

But I guess it couldn't have been any other way, because what Kana asks out of Aqua this chapter is a reflection of what she has wanted all along:

I mentioned it before that Kana started fixating on Aqua as being that person for her, and this chapter shows that's still the case. There's nothing inherently wrong with that IMO, in fact it could be empowering to know that as long as this one person is in your corner, you can take on the world.

The problem is that so far, Aka hasn't quite written it that way. The secret behind Kana's acting is that she wants people to look at her, she wants people to acknowledge her, to love her. But when that desire is centered on Aqua and Aqua alone, she gets so hung-up on him that it's debilitating. She literally became a shell of herself during that year Aqua was no longer a part of her life.

Last time I felt Kana was acting pathetic, Aka confirmed that she was indeed meant to be perceived that way, and Kana gave herself a reality-check:

I thought Kana's moment of self-awareness was going to lead her to be emotionally independent from Aqua, but it seems that the fact that Aqua wound up saving her either way undid that progress. Now that she has hope that he may date her if she makes a move, she's taking it so far that she's ranking her romance with him over her lifelong dreams.

All this to say that since Aka once deliberately wrote Kana being overly dependant on Aqua to show that it's not how she is meant to be, I can't help but hope we may see something similar later.

Granted, Kana being written like a shounen love-interest whose entire purpose is just to get with the MC has always been a risk, so I guess this is par for that course lol

As for Aqua, I mentioned before that I believe Kana is everything he liked about both, Ai and Sarina and thus, the perfect Oshi... and this chapter has Kana declaring out-loud that she wants to be his one true Oshi No Ko.

Moreover, this is happening right after Ruby told Aqua this:

And while Sarina is undoubtedly Goro's Oshi, Kana wants to be Aqua's. The issue with that however... is that Kana wants to be the only person Aqua looks at, his Number One.

Meanwhile, Aqua kind of has his hand full in that regard already, so it's no wonder that through his shock, he isn't able to "catch" the ball symbolizing that particular part of Kana's dream 😂

There's his eyes, too. Last chapter I said that Aka seems to want us to compare the Aqua-Ruby chapters we got in this volume with Kana's, and the way Kana's confession was structured seems to confirm this is the case. So following that comparison, it stands out to me that Ruby's words brought out Aqua's white star and Kana's didn't. Especially because just a few chapters ago we saw Kana bring out Aqua's white star just by being Kana:

In this chapter Kana praises him, validates him, confirms that she is into him (which he has likely known since, coincidentally, at least Chapter 30), yet Aqua’s star remains black all throughout.

Why is that? Is it just his self-hatred and his guilt-complex keeping him from accepting that he’s the object of Kana’s straight gaze?

Or could Aka be hinting at something else?

Aqua has a lot of issues. Some have been with him since he was Goro, and others he has developed during his current life. We saw that Ruby's words pacified the "Goro" within him, but Aqua dismissed Ruby's affection as being aimed at him because he once was Goro. It's not something he feels he has earned in his current life. Kana is the other side of that complex equation. Everything she knows about him are things he has been willing to show her, but what about everything else? What about his trauma and his dark impulses? What about his past? Aqua likely thinks her view of him is skewed, and he is not wrong in that regard. But I'll stop there before I bring Akane into the mess lmao

All in all, for the time being, I feel like what we saw this chapter tracks with my thoughts here:

Aqua, Kana, Ai and Aka's concept of Oshi

Kana is the Ultimate Oshi (parallels to Sarina and Ai) + 1

Even more parallels and a theory about their purpose

Considering how lousy Aka's writing has been lately, I feel like this is still the most interesting route he could take. After all, if we abide by the values he preached in Kaguya, then Oshi is meant to be a platonic concept. So following Aka's logic, for Aqua and Kana to end up together, Aqua would need to tell her that he doesn't want her to be his Oshi, but his lover.

Of course, it's entirely possible that Aka is going to walk back on all of that. Oshi no Ko is supposed to be its own manga, after all. Maybe it's his attempt at writing tropes in the most straight-forward way possible and Aka's new idea of a big love declaration is Aqua finally waving the white lightstick at Kana's graduation concert.

If the curtains truly are just blue, I hope the writing will remain as hilarious as it has been these past few chapters 😂

In the meantime, the other thing that stood out to me this chapter was Aqua himself. We all know that being a surgeon was Goro's dream, so it makes sense for Goro to chase that dream in this new life as Aqua. I was even happy for him when he first brought it up because this life is his chance to do everything he wanted but couldn't in his first life!

But last chapter we had a big showing of "Goro" telling "Aqua" that he is free to live his own life now. In other words, instead of trying to do what Goro would have done if he had a second chance, he can focus on doing the things that he wants to do as the individual he has become during his life as Aqua Hoshino.

So, I feel like this begs the question: is being a surgeon truly Aqua Hoshino's dream? Like not even something he wants to do alongside other things, but his outright dream?

I can't help but wonder. Particularly because, in my opinion, the TB arc did a good job at foreshadowing that Aqua Hoshino is made to be an actor.

In this chapter Kana seems to be fooling herself into giving up on her childhood dream because she thinks it's out of her reach. It would fit, then, for the Aqua in this chapter to be fooling himself as well.

If we entertain the thought of wanting to be a surgeon being a vestige of his old life rather than something Aqua truly dreams of in his current life, then his reaction in these pages becomes more interesting:

Kana assumes Aqua is just embarrassed, but these panels to me read like something more than that - for more reasons than one.

Just like Goro guided him to Kana last chapter possibly based on his own wants, in this chapter Kana unknowingly guides him to Goro's.

She is completely right. Every word she says rings true.

But I'd argue that everything she said was already accomplished by Goro in his previous life. He did save lives (although not as many as he would've wanted, and not the ones that counted the most for him), he was a light to Sarina, etc. etc. He was a good doctor.

Everything Kana says about Aqua was already true of Goro. On the other hand, Kana's description of Aqua paints nothing but virtues, and we know for a fact Aqua isn't only just light. More than that, we know for a fact that Aqua doesn't see himself that way.

Much like how in Chapter 149 we got Kana giving a very positive but very one-sided description of Akane that leaves out her negative traits, Kana more or less does the same thing with Aqua here.

In Chapter 149, Akane first got flustered (her idol Kana-chan was praising her, after all) and then sobered up; possibly because for her it's the opposite (she isn't a goody-two-shoes nor normal nor decent, and men would prefer women who are - like Kana).

I feel like in this Chapter, we may or may not have seen a repeat of this with Aqua. It's his Oshi no Kana praising him, but does he really believe the things she's saying of him? Or are they just a reminder of what he is not (according to himself)?

I can't help but wonder, because last time we saw Aqua blushing to the point that he had to hide his face, Mengo and Aka made sure we could see his blush.

The way he is drawn here is very obviously meant to be paralleled to this chapter, he shields his face in the same way and all. So why not simply show his blush, just like they did in Chapter 29?

Granted, this is just me naturally going for the most interesting possibility lol It is entirely possible and even likely that this is all as simple as it seems. But to be fair, in Chapter 30 he throws the ball at Kana in the same way and it wasn't because Kana was right. At the contrary: it was because he was having a moment and Kana drew the most basic conclusion out of it, one that embarrassed him lmao

Geez it's kind of sad how this manga lends itself to two completely different readings and the most basic one is the one with the highest chances of being true 😂

#fandom: onk #me: aqua and kana #I'd looooove to just focus on the in-your-face-read of all this #but I can't help myself lmao the alternative reading is so much more interesting #granted it could all lead to the same destination either way #but at least the road to get there would be more interesting than just kana living out her shoujo romance 😂

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nessjo · 4 months ago

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Team Black: Maegor with Teats

Not that long ago a made a post that talked about how I see myself as neither Team Black or Team Green since both sides have their pros and cons, but today I saw a video from 'Valaritas' titled "Why Rhaenyra Targaryen Would Never Make A Good Queen" and it not only strengthened some of my points but it also showed me new ones.

The basic point that it proves is, that the show is very Team Black coded and that for the show, the actions from Fire and Blood were town down. So in this talking about Book Rhaenyra and NOT Show Rhaenyra.

So let's summan up the video (more like quoting it, but hey!):

What makes a good ruler? Wisdom, Courage or something else and which one of these qualities did she possess and would she truly be a good queen?

Rhaenyra was a spiteful, jealous and lustful woman and her only basis for succession was her father's words, she lacked a strong sense of duty and her personal desires led her to make a lot of poor choices.

Yes, she was in a disadvantaged position in Westeros because she was the chosen Heir and a Woman, however despite this circumstances she struggled to embrace her role and fulfill her responsibilities.

Being King or Queen is a grave responsibility and requires them to possess a developed sense of Duty so that they can act in the best interests of the realm.

The problem with Rhaenyra is that she has no sense of Duty and often flouts her responsibilities. She wants power, unfettered power without realising that such a thing doesn't exist. She never tried to make herself more suitable for the throne, instead she just expected everyone to obey her as their Queen.

Firstly the books make it clear, that Rhaenyra became the chosen Heir, just so that the throne doesn't get passed down to Daemon, she was the last chance after the death of her brother for her father to make sure that the throne doesn't goes to his brother. Up until the Rhaenyra was treated simply as a princess and hadn't learned much about being a Queen. Despite knowing her father only became the King because he was a man, she didn't learn anything from history and didn't take any action to demonstrate that she was fit to be a Queen.

One of the most significant criticism of Rhaenyra's irresponsibility is undoubtedly her having three Bastard Sons. The Fact that the future Queen gave birth to illegitimate children is scandalous enough but what makes it worse is that she tried to pretend the were legitimate (which worked in the book better than in the show) and threatened everyone who questioned her and her sons.

In many respects her actions bear a striking resemblance to those of Cersei. Much like Cersei she consistently sought to suppress the truth by silencing those against her, for example she ordered Daemon to behead Vaemond and then to fed his corpse to her dragon, before that she wanted Aemond to be harshly questioned when he made similar claims. She went as far as to endorse murder and torture to perpetuate the lie and failed to recognize that illegitimate children on the iron throne would inevitably lead to a war.

At this point we should also criticise Viserys, because similar to Rhaenyra he failed in his responsibilities as the King. He made her path to the iron throne more difficult rather than easier. He did not educate her in a manner befitting an heir and furthermore he sowed the seeds of Civil War by having three legitimate sons.

In a world like Westeros you can't just throw away centuries old laws of agnetic primogeniture, you can't declare that your daughter will me the next Queen and you can't expect it to happen peacefully. He thought by just saying it, the people would expect it but no matter what anyone says, history is written by the victors and if Rhaenyra would have one the war, it would have paved the way for a woman to become the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms. That wasn't the case, you can't convince anyone by saying that your father wanted you to be Queen, when the eldest son has been on the throne for years.

It actually shows their inability to understand the world around them. They both failed to make tough but essential decisions. When Alicent gradually took over the small council, Rhaenyra should have thought about taking decisive action to protect her claim, instead she decided to stay in Dragonstone (a major mistake by her). While there is nothing wrong for the rightful Heir to reside there, she wasn't a typical Heir. She should have been by her father's side from the beginning, engaging in political maneuvers but instead she allowed the Greens to gain more influence in the council and the capital.

She was either naive or some might say foolish and to some extent overly self-absorbed for thinking that the realm would accept and love her just because she was the chosen Heir of King Viserys Targaryen.

Some might argue that if the Greens would have done nothing and had Rhaenyra become Queen that there wouldn't have been a War, which might be true in some extent, as King, Viserys and Rhaenyra had a responsibility to prevent succession crises that could tarnish the heir's claim.

Many of Rhaenyra's problems stemmed from her assumption that she wouldn't encounter resistance for the throne or her disregard for how her actions could be used against her. If she had been more strategic she could have consolidate her power, but she created problems for herself by believing she had an unquestionable right to the throne.

If the event of the Dance of the Dragons didn't happen or didn't play as they did, she would have been at least a mediocre Queen, but it's important to note that it's easy to be a good ruler when your playing on easy mode in a peaceful and prosperous realm with no opposition and all you have to do is not screw it up (this goes for both Rhaenyra and Aegon).

When we look at Rhaenyra we can she an entitled woman who often prioritizes her own desires and interests over the wellbeing of the realm. She had three obvious bastards, displayed unnecessary cruelty to her enemies and married Daemon during a politically tumultuous time without regard of her recently deceased husband (in the book he really was killed).

Above all else she consistently avoids putting herself in harms way to advance her cause, leading to disastrous consequences such as Rhaenys's (and may more) death. Moreover she doesn't know how to please and get along with those around her, often appearing stubborn and spiteful. She lacks skills in navigating political situations, she's not adept at fighting or commanding and she fails to effectively utilise people who could support her.

She doesn't seem to have a clear plan in her mind and when her carelessness combined with her growing paranoia following the loss of her children, it became evident that she no longer could be a good Queen. In her short time in King's Landing she began to see enemies all around her and couldn't handle the pressures of being a Queen.

Her attempt to imprison Addam Velaryon solely based on insanity and paranoia is a clear example of her unsuitability for the throne. She is a woman that sought power for its own sake, believing it was her rightful claim, a similar sensebof entitlement can be seen in Daenerys as well (Valaritas has another whole video about that, so feel free to check that one out).

At the end of the day the books may have a bunch of rumours that sometimes exaggerated a lot but still there is a reason why she's called MAEGOR WITH TEATS.

While King's Landing was suffering from starvation, she hosted an extravagant part for her son Joffrey's birthday. She increased taxes and earned the nickname "Maegor with Teats", reflecting her all harsh actions without remorse. She never cared enough about the realm and it's people and she always prioritised her own desires.

This is why Valaritas and I think that (Book) Rhaenyra could never be a good Queen.

P.S.: I wrote this not the minor the work of Valaritas, especially because I basically wrote word for word what he said. His summary is just to perfect to phrase it any different and I for myself am a person that overall enjoys reading something like this more that just clicking on a YouTube link in a post. Non the less I'm putting the video down here for those that rather watch the video then read my text version (with slightly different words here and there)

youtube

#hotd #house of the dragon #rhaenyra targaryen #viserys targaryen #aegon ii targaryen #vaemond velaryon #daemon targaryen #alicent hightower #maegor with teats #maegor the cruel #maegor targaryen #video to text #jacaerys targaryen #jacaerys velaryon #Youtube

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clanwarrior-tumbly · 2 years ago

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NWhile you're doing pokemon, might i ask, for a platonic headcanons ofseeiven, Penny and Nemona x reader,

where reader's showing them the snowy cat weasel legendary pokemon that was sealed away(i forget names atm-), i can picture arven at least being concerned seeing the dex's entry for it as reader's just all "oh but it's a sweetheart! Don't be so worried!" as theyre giving the pokemon that no doubt would absolutely cause a devastating avalanche if the reader wasnt there scritches and pats/lh

feel free to ignore just thought it could be amusing!/lh

-salt anon(stay safe btw!)

This is perfect timing bc I caught Chien-Pao today (and also Ting-Lu, my fav) after struggling and restarting the game a lot

............

After Ms. Raifort piqued your interest in the "Treasures of Ruin", you set out to free them from their confinements, knowing these poor things were taken advantage of centuries ago.

You believe they could still be helped. It wasn't too late! All they needed was love and friendship, things you were more than happy to provide.

Of course, pulling the stakes that sealed the Icerend Shrine and challenging Chien-Pao afterwards was no cakewalk, but you caught it after convincing it to come with you, promising to give it a better life.

The feline ice-type was surprisingly quick to warm up to you after you gave it a bath during a picnic, figuratively melting its icy heart.

You took great care in shining its sword fangs, smiling when it purred in thanks before taking a nap in the grass, curled up.

It becomes harder to believe this sweet creature had a hand in destroying an entire kingdom.

Soon after, you decided to call your friends so they could see it for themselves.

As expected, Nemona was the first to arrive, psyched to see a Pokémon she's only heard about in books.

She could immediately tell it was quite strong (despite it being cuddled up to you when she got there).

"..and you're gonna let me fight it one day, right?" She dares to ask, taken aback when Chien-Pao wakes up and looks at her in disdain.

You just laugh and shake your head, giving the Ruinous Pokémon chin scritches. "Unless you wanna be swept away by an avalanche..I don't think so. Besides, I think it's been through enough fights in its life."

Not long after her arrival, Penny and Arven show up, completely shook(tm) at the existence of this bizarre Pokémon.

Penny’s surprised it was just stuck in its own little cave all these years, while Arven’s curious about what the Pokedex says about it.

But when he finds out..well...to say he’s just “concerned” is a huge understatement.

He’s downright scared for you, having no clue how you tamed it and fearing the repercussions of freeing it.

“...[y/n], this thing is more than just a Pokémon..it’s...it’s got a bunch of souls in it--angry souls of people who hated that “king”. It also causes terrible avalanches and-”

“Oh give it a rest, Arven...does this look like the face of someone who’d cause terrible avalanches?” You pouted, holding either side of Chien-Pao’s face as you stared at him. “Do you see any hatred here? Because I don’t.”

When he has no answer, you resume patting its head, treating it like a big ol’ kitty that was simply misunderstood.

Even Penny becomes brave enough to pet its back, only to freeze when it sends an icy gaze at her. “Uh....sorry...?”

She thinks she did something wrong and is about to invoke the wrath of this ancient beast....

Until Chien-Pao purrs and nuzzles her cheek, invading her personal space just like Koraidon/Miraidon did all those times, causing you to chuckle and shake your head.

You could only hope to nurture the other three in the quartet into sweet and cuddly creatures like this one.

#no kidding tho #i was suffering trying to catch this one #but it was worth it ^w^#clanask #salt anon #pokemon x reader #pokemon scarlet x reader #pokemon violet x reader #pokemon penny #pokemon arven #pokemon nemona #pokemon treasures of ruin #chien pao #platonic #headcanons

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tellthemeerkatsitsfine · 3 months ago

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Follow-up to this post, which I'm not reblogging because it was too long to put all that all over people's feeds again. That post was a follow-up to two earlier posts, one of which I linked from it and one of which I copy-pasted into the text. So there's your context, if you'd like any, for me posting the following audio clip, followed by a transcription of the audio in it:

Chris Skinner: This is a really weird question, Andy. It’s from [my first and last name], I don’t fully understand it myself but couldn’t resist it. Andy Zaltzman: Right. Chris Skinner: Um. Hello. In July 2004, a BBC questionnaire asked Andy Zaltzman and John Oliver what they most wanted in the world, and they both said a head like an orange. Andy Zaltzman: Right. Chris Skinner: In July 2024, Andy Zaltzman listed his top pipe dreams on The Bugle, and included a head like an orange. No one gave context on either occasion, and I cannot for the life of me recall any time in the intervening twenty years where Andy has referenced this. Please tell us, Andy. Why do you want a head like an orange?

Andy Zaltzman: Right. Uh, it’s a good question, Sarah. Um… well, I don’t know if I actively want a head like an orange, although I have said, clearly, on at least two occasions, that I would like a head like an orange. The, uh… I don’t remember the BBC questionnaire, uh, from 2004. To be honest, I don’t even remember saying it on The Bugle in July, one month ago, in 2024. But I’m nearly fifty now. These things just slip out of my mind, because my head is like a sieve. So an orange would be better, it would store information better, I think, than my current brain. Um, well this goes back to, uh, a favourite joke from my childhood – the joke about the man with a head like an orange. Have you not – are you aware of this joke, Chris?

Chris Skinner: I don’t think I am. Please tell me the joke. Andy Zaltzman: Well, the joke, uh, fundamentally, is, uh… and, John – I think John was, and, Chris Addison, who we worked with on The Department – I think we all liked the head like an orange joke. The joke is fundamentally a guy – you know, a guy is in a bar, and someone comes in, um, and, just looks like a normal person, but he’s got a head like an orange. And, uh, the guy goes up and said, sorry, I don’t want to intrude, but do you mind telling me why you’ve got a head like an orange? And he said, “Oh yeah, it’s quite an interesting story. I went to an antique shop, bought, uh, bought an old lamp, and then, I was just polishing it at home, and this genie came out. He said you can have three wishes, so for my first wish, I wished that I could have – you know, fifty million pounds. So, you know, enough so I’d never have to worry about money again, but not so much that I become an asshole. For my second wish, uh, I wish that I could become the world’s greatest table tennis player, because I’ve always loved table tennis, but I’ve always been rubbish at it. I went out and played – basically unbeatable. And for my third wish, I wished that I had a head like an orange.” Um. So that’s the – that’s the joke. I mean, it’s… you know, is that a joke? Is it an anti-joke? Is it an exploration into the meaning of futility? Is it, uh – does it, does it really get to the very heart of what human ambition is? What are we striving for in life? You know, the, the, the ephemeralities that we cling to, um, and the absurd wishes that humanity has? Who knows? Or is it just, um, a stupid, uh – a stupid joke? Who knows? I mean, that’s not for me to judge. But anyway, we both loved that joke. Obviously, it came up in an interview in 2004, and obviously it was still there in my head twenty years – twenty years later. So… and, you know, it’s clearly a joke that, you know, some people like more than others. And evidently, um, John and I were on the… more. Um, than the others. Um. So anyway, so that’s – it think that’s – that’s as simple as it gets. But again, you know. You look at how the world could be improved – if Donald Trump did not have Donald Trump’s head, but had an orange for a head, he would be instantly a far more likeable person, and much less likely to win the American election, because they’ve never voted for anyone with, uh, a piece of citrus fruit as a head. Uh, if you discount, um, Grover Cleveland. Um. So, uh – so there you go. Um, so that’s, that’s, that’s – that’s the reason, fundamentally. But, you know, I haven’t actually –

Chris Skinner: I mean, it’s a little bit clearer now. Just a little. Andy Zaltzman: I haven’t – you know, to be honest, Sarah, I haven’t… you know, actually sat down and thought, would I like a head – do I really, really want this? But – because, I mean, there are occasions, um, without wishing to break the secrets of the trade, where as comedians, we do say things we don’t entirely, literally mean. But, you know, on this occasion, I – maybe I do. Maybe I do, subconsciously, literally, metaphorically, mean it. Chris Skinner: Well, good luck on your quest. Andy Zaltzman: Thanks.

They say my full name early in that clip, which I considered bleeping out before sharing it, because I don't want to have my full name on here. But I didn't bother, because... I mean, it's on the podcast. It's on the freely available podcast (the subscriber-only podcast, but still). Seems a bit silly to cut that out of a clip when if someone really wanted to dox me with my full name, they could go listen to it quite easily. I'm pretty sure no one wants to do that. My concerns about privacy are not because I'm worried about the strangers on Tumblr knowing my real name, it's because I don't want the people in my real life to know what I'm doing on the internet. So I censored my full name when I wrote out the transcript, because occasionally friends tell me they were Googling me to watch my old match videos, and I don't need this coming up. But it's on the tape, how fucking weird is that? My real-life name.

I guess I could have thought that through and sent it from an account that didn't have my real name in the signature. But if I'd thought that far, I would have also done things like, not written that question like a fucking Tumblr post. Oh my God, it went on for so long. That thing I do on Tumblr, where I open by listing pieces of context ("in July 2004, a BBC questionnaire", and then "in July 2024, this other thing...") before getting to my point - I know that's not how you're supposed to communicate in real life! I do know that! I do it on Tumblr because I'm a massive fan of context and no one here is captive to my ramblings. I try not to talk like that when I have a direct audience.

I assumed they'd cut the question down, if they did address it, which I did not think they would. I clearly didn't think it through very well at all, but as far as I made any assumptions, I guess I assumed that they get in lots of questions that are a mess written by someone who does not do media for a living, and then they condense it into an appropriately concise statement for a podcast. But nope. Chris Skinner read out every fucking word of my email. Because obviously Andy Zaltzman needed to know that I have catalogued the exact month of his interviews from 2004.

On the subject of editing things into an acceptably media-ready format - I used to do some work as a transcriber, and I learned the different types of transcription. Normally, if I quote from some audio on Tumblr, I'll do intelligent verbatim transcription, which means typing all the words that were said except the filler words (um, uh), filler phrases (I mean, you know), and unnecessary word repetitions. But with Andy Zaltzman, I tend to go pure verbatim transcription, which means typing exactly what he said, leaving all that stuff in. Because with Andy Zaltzman, the filler words tend to seem like an important part of it. It's part of his charm, the extent to which he sounds like he has never done public speaking before, despite having made a career of it for nearly his entire adult life. This isn't a Kitson-like stutter or anything, he's just very socially awkward. And I typed pure verbatim in the above transcription to show that I'm pretty sure my question got him stumbling over his words even more than usual. Andy was so unprepared to be asked to answer for some shit in he said on a BBC questionnaire in 2004, which is absolutely fair enough. You cannot hold people to everything they said in 2004.

I also love how for a professional comedian, Andy Zaltzman is so good at taking anything vaguely surreal and driving it into straight-up anti-humour. He told that joke in such a weird way, in a way that made it seem like classic Zaltzman humour, and I immediately understand why he liked it so much.

He didn't have to ramble for that long; He could have answered my question far more concisely. I didn't ask for half that information. But he gave it to us anyway, and I am so incredibly pleased. I mean, I don't have to ramble for ages in my Tumblr posts either, but I do it, because I respect the art of rambling. And I fucking love listening to other people ramble, especially if they're 1,000 times better than I am at making their ramblings intelligent and funny. Yet, somehow, just as awkward. Fucking brilliant.

So now I come to the even less coherent part of my post, which is to say - Jesus Fucking Christ Andy Zaltzman said my name. Twice. Count them, he said it twice. And I will be saving those audio clips specifically. On one occasion, he specifically addressed me by name, before carefully informing me that sometimes comedians don't mean everything they say, which feels like a genuinely useful thing for Andy Zaltzman to break to me. Thank you, Andy. The next time I'm down a rabbit hole of trying to untangle a comedy mystery, I will keep your helpful words in mind. Good thing to listen to on the anniversary of Cowgate.

On the other hand, I love how literally he took my question. I asked him why he wanted a head like an orange, and he took a fair bit of time to explain to me that actually, he was just making a joke, he doesn't really want a head like an orange, and I should know that sometimes comedians don't mean things literally. To which I would sort of like to tell him... when I said "Why do you want a head like an orange?", I was trying to ask "What joke you were referencing when you talk about that?", and not literally asking why you actually want that in real life. Is it possible that Andy Zaltzman, like me, might have some occasional tendency toward taking things a bit literally? I guess we'll never know.

Anyway, holy hell it turns out that if you have a question for a comedian, you're allowed to just fucking ask them? I truly didn't think that would work. I've been wondering for like two years what Andy Zaltzman and John Oliver were talking about in that BBC questionnaire - it was the repetition in the recent Bugle episode that prompted me to actually email them, but I'd been wondering personally for far longer. It turns out, the whole time, I was allowed to just send a fucking email and get my question answered. Are you allowed to do that with everything? Because that would be far more power than anyone should be allowed to have. You can't do that, that doesn't feel like it should be allowed. If you're confused about something said by a comedian, you're supposed to just do hours and years of internet research into potential explanations, and write long rambling Tumblr posts speculating about it. What kind of world would it be if instead, we could just ask? Or maybe even just assume that, in the words of Andy Zaltzman, "there are occasions, um, without wishing to break the secrets of the trade, where as comedians, [they] do say things [they] don’t entirely, literally mean."

More than that, I inspired a fucking Zaltzman riff! He went off on some stuff about Donald Trump, even avoided the obvious joke about how Trump does have an orange-coloured head, because Andy is better than that. And I even inspired a classic Zaltzman lie! I said this in another recent post, about a radio show the Zaltzman did with Daniel Kitson in 2007, where it was a rare chance to hear how Andy talks when he has no prepared material, and his jokes became almost entirely just telling lies. His prepared material jokes also consist of a lot of lies, but they have a bit of structure and purpose. While when Andy Zaltzman is free-wheeling, showing us there first place his sense of humour goes before he has time to refine any ideas, it's just pure, unadulterated lies. Like in this podcast, where he was in the middle of answering an unexpected question, and just stopped to pluck a lie out of the air for no reason, about a former American president having citrus fruit for a head. A classic Zaltzman lie, because of something I said! I haven't been this proud of myself since I made Nish Kumar laugh by my reaction to his joke at his gig. Inspiring a Zaltzman lie seems similar to inspiring the trademark Kumar laugh, getting USPs out of my favourite comedians.

Also, I'm pleased to see I was at least slightly correct to read significance into Andy Zaltzman referencing the "head like an orange" thing in a Bugle episode where Chris Addison was a guest, and Chris Addison laughed at that and commented "That is a very old, and very in joke." I'd thought at the time that Chris was saying it was an in-joke, as in an "inside joke", probably one that originated around The Department or Political Animal, which were things Chris Addison did with Andy Zaltzman and John Oliver back around 2004, when I originally saw John and Andy reference the "head like an orange". I now think I misunderstood, and Chris Addison sarcastically calling it an "in-joke", meaning "in style", implying that the joke is actually old and out of style. That's my guess, anyway. But Andy Zaltzman mentioned in his reply that Chris Addison also liked that joke, so I was correct to notice that Chris recognized it when Andy made that joke again in 2024.

Well, that was pretty good. He didn't tell me to stop asking stupid questions and never listen to his podcast again. But I definitely am going to stop asking stupid questions now. Good God. Can't believe that happened. Thanks for being unable to resist my weird question, Producer Chris.

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stitchwraith-stingers · 2 months ago

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(some-what of) an analysis on patty possom(?)

inspired by this post on the PE-AZ yes this episode is my fave yes i unironically love patty yes i was a fnaf kid yes i am utterly deranged

some of these r incoherent because its midnight and i wanna post this as fast as possible before i go to bed and wake up at the crack at dawn

yayyy patty ^_^

one of the first things ive noticed post becoming alive like the next frankeinstine is that her eye wasnt fixed by the mechanics, which as ill discuss later imply a sort of negligence (? i think) to the properly, i however dgaf and like to interperate this as her having a lazy eye <3

she seems to be a genuially nice person!!!! um . i dont know how to continue this paragrapth pretend theres something here thats interesting

imagine being born into the world and already having a dreadful fear of being abandoned. crazy, mustve impacted her very hard

though this probably means it gave her fake memories or she was already sorta vaugely away of whats happening?? like psudo sentient?? if that makes sense, how the hell do you know this girl, you havent BEEN to the devils sacrament

the way she goes about it and the ending shows that she has no clue on how to socialize or their cues at all, or just cuz of the pov its intentionally shown as more creepy (which it probably is, you could hear her go "where r u going :(" in a sad tone), shes a massive werido and i love her for that

point is, shes nice but has no idea how to say "nooo dont leave me haha" normally cuz she just appeared 2 seconds ago with no idea of proper communication, does that make sense..... help

heres the thing i love about this the most, shes at the end of the ep shes seen dragging background character #47 in the same tone of voice and hes seen uncomfortable. PAN TO THE NEXT SLIDE IN WHICH THEY SEEM OK IN THEIR PRESENCE

LIKE . THE GUY JUST ACCEPTS HER HAND TO HOLD WHEN SHES SHOCKED..... THEY R BESTIES AND IM TIRED OF PPL OVERLOOKING IT, and the fact that i dont think we get to see him again (cuz they couldnt fit him anywhere in the background? i think) makes it better for me, balding old guy notices furry twice his size scared of being left alone so he decides to stay here just for her.... MANNN

the general area

lets see, were right off the bat were introduced to a good few places, the fun tunnels, the game zone, a claw machine thats rigged, the place with the signature snack which i wont go over because thats kinda of its own gag but its sticky and probably unhealthy, and the main stage

i assume the fun tunnels are made with a holograpthic effect inuniverse, and i think theres some LED lights in there to make it glow, i was going to say its polyethylene plastic but i dont think that exists google stock photos lied to me, also not related but it looks like a horrible spray paint job was done on this thing lol

also acording to the lyrics theres supposed to be 3 more members, a raccoon, cat and turtle . i dont think we see craggle in photo though rip (if theyre not a sphyinx ill be dissapointed), tyrone seems to have a 60's? aesthetic going on, rascal has a punk aesthetic going on and patty has a more modern aesthetic ? i think, the spiked collar is throwing me off

from winns dialouge in the start implying that they havent been here in a good while ("when i was little" ur in 5th grade) and the fact that their instruments are still there, then this was probably a recent desicion, or atleast long enough for a 10 y/o that hasnt been here in awhile to be upset by this and for patty to be immediatly spawned in with abandonment issues

along with a rigged claw machine and the snack i think it implies that the people over there who own this establishment are probably really cheap, and the fact that the PRAMBY snack is really sticky is definatly going to cause some health issues down the line, something something fazbear entertainment

oh and also, theres like a split second frame where this shows up, obviously its just there as a morbid joke but atleast it shows us this establishment is atleast old enough to have someones decaying body be bone by now, which after writing that makes me sound stupid because skeletonization might not take as long as i thought it would ("3 weeks to several years" depending on the surroundings)

whoever was there seemed to have been stuck for 25 days at least and has gone undetected, which means this place is linked to one unsolved missing persons case and they dont have a clue (most likely), also theres ballpit balls inside this thing i fucking guess?? theres no actual ballpit in the place idk what this kid was doing

i have tried to make up a map of how the place looks but im always bad with rooms ? and i had to take a fewwww small creative liberties with this cuz i couldnt figure out where theyd be but close enough👍👍

#calico.exe #long post #not under a cut fuck you #I HATE THE WAY I WORD THIS BUT RHARNHARHRNHNARHRNAHNRHAN #IM SO EMBERASSEDDDDD BUT ITS LIKE.......... IDC IT MAKES ME HAPPY FUCK YOU LOOK AT MY POSSOM #fop #fairly oddparents #fop a new wish #fairly oddparents a new wish #patty possom

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romchat · 1 year ago

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Story of Kunning Palace Ep. 14: Redemption in life

Jian Xuening: Between my past self and present self, who do you think is better? Xie Wei: Be it the past or the present, it is all you. You're the one and only Miss Ning'er. Besides, the present exists because of the past. Just face it as is. But if we have to make it clear, I think if the present Ning'er knows what she wants, she will be well. And she'll be even better in the future.

Kyaaaa, the scream that just came out of me. This scene from Episode 14 solidified for me why Xie Wei is Jiang Xuening's endgame. Although Zhang Zhe is dreamy and represents the virtuous life Xuening regrets not pursuing as empress, it is ultimately Xie Wei who complements her character. Xuening's story arc isn't just about becoming a better person but also about recognizing that she has always had goodness in her and that goodness makes her life worth just as much as someone like Zhang Zhe. And it is Xie Wei who reminds her of this. She is an "unrefined jade", someone who can choose a more righteous path than the one she started on.

Xuening gave up her life for Zhang Zhe to make amends but also because she idolizes him. In a way, she sees him as more than just a man; he's the embodiment of what is good in the world--the opposite of how she sees her past self.

What I find interesting about their interactions are the small ways she tries to mold herself to fit Zhang Zhe's preferences. (I laughed when her voiceover at the antique shop admitted she didn't know anything about antiques but she would learn for him. Girl, same.) They don't have the fragile but freeing honesty Xie Wei and her have slowly cultivated, and I have a feeling her approach will become exhausting in the long run.

In contrast, Xie Wei argues that she has always had a choice to be a better person because she fundamentally is a good person. Despite being brash and cunning, Xuening is also tenacious, brave, and even kind (all of which Xie Wei recognized when they first met years ago). It is only in life not death that there is the possibility of redemption; she just needs to seek it.

And he sees her.

Truly sees her.

(I have to hand it to Zhang Linghe. These scenes are some of the best acting he's done in years.)

In every timeline, he has watched (over) her and recognized her for her, whether that was by

Calling her Ning'er because of the three words in her name, only "Ning" is her name alone. I think this is particularly poignant given his own estrangement from his family. When they first met, she was still a normal village girl who hadn't officially joined the Jiang family while he had long forsaken his father's name. "Ning'er" is intimate, thoughtful, and honors that shared history;

Apologizing for his anger after assuming the worst of her scheming (e.g., when she was supposedly endangering Yan Lin);

Bringing her sweets when he saw her other study mates had ignored her, even baking them according to her preferences; or

Appreciating her strategic thinking and offering her guidance despite how her plans might complicate his own.

Both Xuening and Xie Wei are people readers (but completely blind to each other's growing feelings, of course), but Xie Wei also uses those skills to care for Xuening in ways that are meaningful to her. He's not changing himself like Xuening wants to do for Zhang Zhe (i.e., how can I fit myself into his world) but instead offering relief (i.e., how can I make her world better).

I can't wait for her to truly see him back so he can redeem himself.

#story of kunning palace #宁安如梦 #ning an ru meng #cdrama #meta #zhang ling he #bai lu #wang xingyue

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joandfriedrich · 4 months ago

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Hope you don’t mind me ranting a little, I was looking for fanfics of Amy and Laurie and I’m kinda sad that a lot of them have him cheating physically or emotionally cheating on Amy with Jo. It’s like people just can’t accept that Laurie grew up (with a little help from Amy) and fell in love with someone else. Jo herself says she isn’t in love with him. And she found a beautiful love with Friedrich, I wish people could let it go. And maybe I’m wrong but with how Laurie was written in the book, I don’t ever see him cheating on Amy whatsoever with anyone. And Jo wouldn’t cheat on Friedrich with Laurie because she was never in love with Laurie!!! It feels so incredibly out of character for the both of them.

There is a way in Archive of Our Own to look for main ship tags. That is what I always do when looking out for Little Women fics. It filters out all the unwanted ones.

For your question, it is what I have been saying in the LW podcast since the beginning, I think the biggest problem is the lack of Laurie's characterization in Little Women adaptations and romanticizing his and Laurie's relationship.

Long loving looks

1949

youtube

1994 the non-required kiss

youtube

2019 Jo wanting Laurie back out of nowhere, and people even saying that "Gerwig" fixed Jo, for wanting Laurie back. Also Timothee Chalamet and Gerwig both saying the promotional tour that Jo and Laurie should be together.

Those are of course just a few examples, but then there is the actual story in the book. No I don't think Laurie would ever cheat on Amy and Jo would certainly not cheat on Fritz.

youtube

I personally believe that LMA planned both marriages years before she wrote the novel. There is a book from Goethe called "Wilhelm Meister's apprenticeship" one of Alcott's favorite books. Wilhelm is very much a Laurie type of character. During the novel he grows as a person. We see, this in the terms of character. He moves on from unhealthy relationship to Marianne to one with Natalia. In LMA's notes, she calls the relationship with Natalia "beautiful". This is both mental and spiritual transformation, it also happens when Jo moves on from Laurie to Fritz.

youtube

I think that is one of those things that people miss on Louisa May Alcott's writings. Person "transcends" in this next relationship, and becomes a better person.

In general I think, most of Laurie's characterization is missing from the adaptations. i know I sometimes critizise him, the way he behaves as a young man, but I think that is the point because he grows out of that behavior when he is with Amy. Had she stayed with Jo he would have remained as a man-child, and they would have both been unhappy.

-Niina/Little Women Podcast

-----------------------------------------

I totally understand your pain, because a few years ago I read a fanfic where Jo gave birth to her son Teddy, and pretty much everyone knows that Jo and Laurie had affair that resulted Teddy, and Friedrich was just fine with it even if a little sad. It is one of the worst fanfictions I have ever read, and I wish I never seen it.

I just have a hard time believing that either Jo or Laurie would cheat on their respective partners, or be the lover to someone married, it is just not in their personalities. Laurie had a crisis when he realized that he wasn't in love with Jo anymore, do people really think he'd just be ok with having affair with someone? The guy would be so racked with guilt that he'd confess to it immediately, he'd even tell Amy about how another woman hit on him and he'd apologize.

Jo clearly had no interest in any man until Friedrich (Jo, and even Friedrich, can be read heavily as being demisexuals), and she has made it incredibly clear that she has no romantic or even sexual feelings for Laurie, constantly calling him her "brother", even trying to set him up with her sisters at different points.

It's crazy how desperate the Jo and Laurie shippers are to try and make them work when Alcott is rolling in her grave to think that people didn't get the obvious that Jo and Laurie do not belong together! Thankfully, there is more than enough good fanfics out there to wash the awful taste in your mouth.

-Christina

#answered asks #fan fiction #amy x laurie #little women #amy and laurie #amy march #theodore laurence #jo march #friedrich bhaer #jo and friedrich #jo x friedrich #anti jo x laurie

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cadaverdolls · 11 months ago

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Plushie gun time!!!

This person is who got me interested in Kylar. I chose to do Gore, an oc of @yogurtpop

Oc or pc it’s all fair game to be hit with a plushie gun! As long it’s the DOL universe.

Gore covers up almost his entire body. Long bangs, face mask, gloves, hoodie, and sweat pants. I decided that to take some cute hair clips and pin that hair up so I could see that little face!

Version with and without clips.

I chose Gore because he has the same little top hair shape that I like giving my OCs. I just can’t resist the heart shape. It’s alway fun making shapes with the top hair piece! Ahoga? Apogee? I can’t remember the name of it. I’ll look it up later!

Now!

☁️ Poof! ☁️

Reason why there is no shoes? I’m be honest I started this one like a week ago and kept dropping it because I got angry. Why angry? I couldn’t get the teeth right for the life of me. So in the end the shoes never got added. Took away the shoe privileges 😤

Now for the doll break down!!

Hair won’t be an issue but the face embroidery will be. Hair can be just fabric (front hair would be separate piece from the face) using medium to long fur fabric, if you want the ability to pin the hair then doll hair would be better (unfortunately doll hair is usually very straight so it need styling to give it some fluffy feel). The scars and asymmetrical mouth would pose a problem. Too much embroidery can cause the face to become stiff. Not an issue if you don’t mind that but it can be an issue if you want a squish-able face. Second issue with it, companies from what I’ve seen want the mouth and eyes to be mostly symmetrical. Different colored eyes or the mouth being a smirk aren’t a huge deal but this is a different case. For something like this you’d probably need to ask a couple different makers. Unless you’re luck and find someone who can do this on your first look.

Body embroidery to give Gore the rest of his scars is possible but the scars would probably need to be simplified. Embroidered over seems is something I’m unsure of so you’d have to limit it to basically front and back (no wrap around).

Drawing wise I gave the corners of the mouth a slight up turn. Not an all out smile. Wanted him to seem inconspicuous? Like he large muscle and covered head to toe. That should be intimidating right? But I feel like it more makes him blend in. Idk if blend in is the right word. You’d turn around and he’d suddenly just be there. That’s the vibe a get. Light footed?

I need to improve with deep scars and wounds. Maybe I’ll try picking more PCs and OCs with scars to practice?

#plushie gun

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banannabethchase · 7 months ago

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Burn Me Down - also on AO3

After Mania XL, Seth runs into Roman. And then into Cody.

Seth and Cody, this is on you for being so womantic together. Title from Smoke by PVRIS.

Seth is alone, limping his way back from medical, when he sees the hunched figure. It’s a shape he memorized years ago, one that still feels a little wrong without a third slouching, smiling, fidgety shape next to him.

“Roman,” he says. It’s the first time in years that name has left his lips without the taste of malice and revenge on his tongue left behind.

He stops in his tracks. Seth prepares for backlash. For rage. For anger. He’ll deserve it.

Instead, Roman looks broken. “What?” he asks. “What could you possibly want?”

“I –” Seth knows what he wants. He wants to be 10 years ago, knowing what he knows now. He wants to be the person Roman deserved back then. He stumbles, a little, ache spinning up his spine.

“You’re hurt.” There’s no concern behind the words. It’s an observation. An obvious one, if Seth can editorialize.

Seth shrugs. “Have been for a while now.”

“Not this hurt.” Roman stares him down. In the past, Seth would have said something to cover the fact that he’ll blink first, he always would. Now, he closes his eyes. “Why’d you do it?”

“Do what?” Seth asks, opening his eyes to see Roman closer.

“You know what you did.” The accusation doesn’t sting like he expected. It aches, though, somewhere deep inside him, somewhere he knows may never heal.

“Say it,” Seth says. Because he doesn’t know what Roman considers the crime. There was too much in this night that could have been the catalyst for that hurt in Roman’s eyes.

“You manipulated me,” Roman says through gritted teeth. His voice is as hard as his eyes. But with the right flame, even steel can melt.

Seth shrugs, because there’s nothing more he can do. “You know who I am,” he says, and he wishes he could be louder.

“You manipulated me,” Roman snarls, “to save him. That’s not you.” He steps closer, until Seth bumps into a table. “That’s never been you.”

Seth swallows. “It is me,” he says, and he’s not sure where Roman is going with this. “I’m always looking out for my own interests. You know that.”

“That isn’t – you took a chair shot, from me – you knew…” He stops, hands clenched at his sides. Seth knows in a second it could be his throat under those fingers. Roman steps in closer, his arms closer to Seth than they’ve been since they almost choked him out. “You knew what I would do.”

Seth shrugs. He won’t balk. But he will fight back. “I did.”

“You gave yourself up, knowing what I’d do.” Roman’s face is too close for Seth to remember how to breathe. “You gave yourself up for somebody else. For him. Twice, two nights in a row.” He’s breathing heavily. Seth hopes whatever he does is at least quick.

He waits. He braces.

“You never did that for me.”

Seth looks at Roman, to see something shattered. Roman looks almost old, the grief of the night stealing years away from the edges of his eyes. “All this,” he says, and he’s crying. Roman Reigns is crying. “All this for him.”

Seth fears for a split second that this is the moment he dies. And then Roman steps away.

“I hope he gives you what you never found in me.”

Seth opens his mouth, a decade’s worth of words caught behind his teeth, but he doesn’t get the chance to say them. Roman offers him what, in other contexts, could be mistaken for a smile. But Seth knows better. Three steps, lacking the swagger that’s become his trademark, and then Roman turns around.

He doesn’t know how long he stands there. He doesn’t know how much time has passed when Cody, smiling, turns the corner.

“Oh, hey!” he says. His grin fades quickly, and he hands Pharaoh’s leash to Ricky who nods. “Rick, I, uh.”

“Later, man,” Ricky says, quietly. He nods at Seth, and it feels, somehow, like approval.

Cody’s hand, bumping against his, feels hesitant. “Seth,” he whispers.

“I did it wrong.” It’s all Seth can say. He doesn’t even know what it means. He only knows that they’re the only words that will come out of his mouth. “I did it wrong.”

“Whoa,” Cody says, steadying him by the shoulders. “Seth, no. You were perfect. You did everything right.”

“Then why does it hurt?” Seth collapses, expecting to hit the hard floor, but Cody catches him, lowering them slowly in a heap. His entire body shakes with sobs, with ten years of memories and regrets wreaking havoc through his already ruined body. He feels Cody collect all of his flailing limbs and pull him into his lap. They’re rocking slowly as Cody holds him close.

Seth’s never told him, is the thing. He never told Cody why he was so willing to sacrifice everything he had to give Cody what he needed. He never told Cody why he was so hell bound to make sure he did right by him.

He never told Cody what all this meant to him.

Cody’s whispering something to him, over and over.

“You’re not bad, Seth,” he says, “I promise, you’re not bad.”

“I did it wrong,” Seth says again. “It shouldn’t hurt anymore if I did it right.”

“What hurts?” Cody asks. “Where? Did medical miss something?”

Seth shakes his head, taking a shaky breath. “Not – not medical.”

“Did the ref miss something?” Cody pulls back, steadies Seth’s face with his hands. “Is there something internal?”

Seth laughs, because technically, yeah. It is internal.

“Okay, do we need to do a concussion protocol here?”

“No,” Seth says, trying to reign in the cackle. “No, no. I –” The laughter cuts off, abruptly, before Seth can get himself under control. “I don’t need that.”

Cody’s eyes are warm but concerned. “I’m getting you back to the hotel,” he says. “Up.”

Seth obeys before he realizes he’s doing it, scrambling to his feat at Cody’s behest like it’s normal.

He would do anything for Cody, he realizes. He doesn’t know when it became true. Only that it is.

“We’ll talk there,” Cody assures Seth. He sets hands on Seth’s shoulders and steers him toward the door.

“Don’t – wait.”

Cody stops, but keeps his hands on Seth’s shoulders. “Wait?”

“You have to celebrate,” Seth says, and he can’t make himself turn to see Cody. He can’t see the relief in his eyes when Cody realizes that Seth is letting him off the hook. “With your friends.”

“Seth,” Cody says gently, his hands smoothing down Seth’s shoulders and down to his arms. “I want to be with you right now.”

Seth turns. “What?”

“If you want to,” and Cody looks so sincere it feels impossible, “I want to celebrate with you.”

Seth has enough wherewithal to check up and down the hallway before he leans in. Cody meets him halfway, pulling him in with strong arms. The belt around his waist presses against Seth’s stomach, but it’s worth it. Cody kisses sure and strong, intentional, and Seth pulls him in close enough to really feel the belt dig in.

Cody pulls back after god knows how much time.

“Hotel,” Seth says, breathless.

They separate to gather their bags, and Seth is in a whirlwind. The kiss didn’t seem to clear anything up; if anything, he’s more confused. The guilt and rejection still hurts, and the memory of Roman’s shattered eyes sticks in his vision. It hovers over him as he packs, as he walks to the hotel, as he rides the elevator to his room, as he drops his bags.

He sinks into the night’s events, feeling the sting of losing his belt, the clawing misery of watching his fair fight with Drew fall to Damian’s cash in, the slice to the heart of hearing the Shield music, the radiating pain of the Superman punch, the lightning strike of the chair to his back.

He helped Cody win.

And it all still hurts.

He’s jolted back to reality when a text buzzes from his phone.

Come by when you’re ready. They put me in the penthouse. Code 2639.

Seth swallows. He shouldn’t go. It’s not fair to Cody, to make him deal with Seth when he’s like this.

Stop freaking out.

Seth blinks at the text. And he does as Cody says.

Five minutes later, when he’s dressed in sweats and a hoodie and his hair in a bun, Seth knocks on the door to the suite. He fiddles with his phone, with his wallet. He expects others to be there, expects noise and expectation and chaos.

Instead, there’s a soft light and Cody. “You’re here,” Cody says. “Come in.”

Seth steps inside and looks around. They really do shell out the big money for that universal title – Seth’s room, though a suite, is nothing like this. “Nice place you got here.”

Cody laughs, dipping his head, and Seth thinks it’s unfair how handsome he looks in pajama pants and a tee shirt. “It’s a lot,” he sighs. He looks up, leveling Seth with piercing blue eyes. “Tonight’s been a lot.”

Seth can’t hold the gaze and looks away, only for Cody to catch his chin and turn him back, face to face. “Seth,” he murmurs. “Talk to me.”

Seth presses his lips together, fighting for words. “I did it wrong,” comes out again, and he wants to kick himself for it. That’s not what he means, it doesn’t even make sense, but he keeps saying it anyway.

“You did everything right,” Cody says, reassuring even though there’s no way he has a clue what Seth is saying. “You hear me?” Seth has no choice but to look up into Cody’s eyes again. “You went above and beyond tonight. You didn’t have to do any of it. But you did. It was incredible.”

“Then why does it hurt so much?” Seth whispers.

Cody guides him to the bed and sits him down gently, and Seth falls against his shoulders. He doesn’t know if he’s crying, exactly, but whatever it is wracks his body, tears out of him. “Why does it hurt?” he gasps, gripping at the soft, worn fabric of Cody’s old Bullet Club tee shirt. “I thought I did the right thing.”

“You did do the right thing,” Cody says. He wraps strong arms around Seths shoulders and holds him.

“Then why did Roman look so miserable?” Seth sighs. He presses his face into Cody’s shoulder, breathing in. He somehow found the time to shower and smells like sandalwood and warmth, maybe a little bit of vanilla. Seth doesn’t know how comforting he’s allowed to find it. “Why did Roman look like I broke his heart all over again?”

“Ah,” Cody says. “That’s it.”

Seth sits up, and wipes tears he hadn’t known were falling off his face. “If it was the right thing,” he says, voice almost a whisper, “why doesn’t it feel good?”

“Sometimes, you do the right thing because it’s the right thing.” He says. Seth feels him sigh. “Not because it’s easy. Not because it feels good. Not because everybody’s gonna like it.” He nudges Seth up. “You put yourself in between me and the firing squad, Seth. If nothing else, it was the kind thing.” He leans his forehead in, hands resting on Seth’s thighs. “To me, though. To me it’s everything.”

Seth fidgets, unsure where to put his hands. He settles for on the bed, outside of Cody’s arms. “I feel guilty,” Seth says. “For – for making him do that to me. For turning him into me.”

“Oh, no,” Cody says. “Not that again. Who you were isn’t who you are. And if anything, you made up for that. Tonight.” He smiles, and Seth feels parts of his body rearranging to fit Cody inside of him. “Thank you, Seth.”

He manages a smile, eager to get anything back from Cody that feels like praise. The way Cody cups his face is more than he could have dreamed of. “It felt right,” Seth says. “Roman couldn’t keep doing that.”

Cody nods. “You really dug deep, though. Back can’t be feeling good right now.”

“It’s been worse,” Seth lies. “Really.”

Cody studies his face. “Have you gotten a chance to shower yet?”

Seth shakes his head. “No. Do I stink or something?”

Cody laughs. “No. There’s this jacuzzi tub in this suite, giant thing. Wanna take a bath?”

Seth feels flaming hot all of a sudden. He’s seen a lot of Cody tonight, given parts of himself to Cody that he never thought he had. And yet, the two of them naked together in a bath seems more intense than anything else they’ve done.

“Yes,” Seth breathes. “I like that idea.”

Cody is incredibly gentle as he pulls Seth’s clothing off. He hadn’t expected this part – Cody trails searching fingertips along Seth’s skin, like he’s checking him for injuries. Seth can’t help but jump as Cody grazes his lower back.

“Sensitive, huh,” Cody murmurs. “Maybe I can give you a little massage?”

“Sure,” Seth says, but he’s pretty sure he’d agree to anything if Cody kept touching him. Cody smiles and takes Seth’s hand, leading him toward the suite bathroom.

It’s huge. Almost as huge as Seth’s bedroom at home. A shower with a waterfall showerhead, a large jacuzzi tub with jets, a two person vanity with lights. There are two thick, cozy robes hanging on the back of the door as Cody closes it.

“Two robes, huh?” Seth asks.

Cody shrugs. “Guess I got lucky.”

Seth knows it’s not the time to say, “you might, if you keep talking like this,” but he thinks it and smiles. “Let’s get in that bathtub.”

“More like a hot tub, if you ask me.”

Cody turns on the faucet and it fills quickly, but not quickly enough to keep Seth from getting in Cody’s space.

“Oh, I see,” Cody laughs, settling his hands on Seth’s hips, “now you’re not using your words to get in my head, are you?”

Seth shrugs. “Figure I should kiss you a few more times before you get me naked in a tub with you.”

Cody leans in, and this time the kiss is more demanding. Seth gives what Cody asks for, opening his mouth, whimpering as Cody’s tongue slides into his mouth. It’s too much talent in one man, he thinks, as he almost loses his steadiness in his knees as Cody grips his hips. They’re almost exactly the same height, and he finds it to be the best angle he’s ever gotten in a kiss.

“Tub,” Cody murmurs, pulling back just far enough to speak. He presses a few more kisses to Seth’s lips, not letting him pull away.

“Can’t get in the tub if you keep kissing me,” Seth giggles. He feels light, effervescent, and he doesn’t know how it’s allowed to be this excited and happy after how much ache the night has caused him.

“Come back,” Cody commands. “Whatever you were thinking about, put it away. It doesn’t matter right now.” He reaches out and tugs the tie from Seth’s hair. “Focus on now. Right here. This.”

“Not allowed to think of how I lost my belt?” Seth asks.

“Nope,” Cody says, and he finally steps out of his boxers, the last barrier between the two of them. Seth forces himself not to look down. It feels too greedy. Cody grins at Seth as he lowers himself into the water, mouth dropping open as his eyes flutter shut. Seth looks now.

“Jesus,” he mutters.

“Come on in,” Cody says. He spreads his legs under the water. “Here.”

Seth presses his lips together and pulls his boxers off and steps the first foot into the water. He worries, briefly, if it’ll be too much, if it’ll be too much for the tub to handle, but the water level barely rises. He slowly lowers himself. When he sits, the water is at the perfect level. He leans forward and turns off the faucet.

“Come here,” Cody murmurs. “Come lean against me.”

He doesn’t know why he’s hesitating. He doesn’t know why it doesn’t feel okay.

“You don’t have to,” Cody says. He expects the words to have a hint of hurt behind them, but instead they’re reassuring, sweet.

Seth leans back.

“Hi,” Cody says, and Seth would swear he feels lips against his hair. “Better?”

“Gravity sucks,” Seth says, settling in. “I like water so much better. Should have been a swimmer.”

“You could have pulled it off,” Cody says. Seth’s mind swims as Cody wraps his arms around his waist. “You have the body for it.”

“Forward,” Seth jokes.

“You’re in my lap in my bathtub,” Cody retorts. “Not sure how much more forward I could be. Oh!” He pulls Seth back by the hips. “How’s that for forward?”

Seth’s mind sets off alarm bells. And he’s not sure what they’re saying. He feels Cody’s dick nudge up against his ass, and it takes a second before he realizes that it’s exactly what he wants right now.

“You, um,” Seth says, unsure of what he wants but sure it’s Cody’s hands on him, “you said something about a massage earlier?”

“I did,” Cody says. “Where at?”

Seth fights a smile. “Lower back, would be nice.”

He feels Cody’s hands slide from his hips to his back. “Here?” Cody murmurs in his ear.

Seth nods, dropping his head forward. “Gentle, though. Chairs fucking suck.”

“They do,” Cody says. His fingertips gently knead into Seth’s sore muscles, soft but intentional, like he’s done this dozens of times before. He probably has, Seth thinks. Hands this talented have to be used for good. And they’re really talented. Seth thinks he’s moaning more than strictly necessary for a simple massage, but it’s worth it.

“Scalp?” Seth slurs, tilting his head back as Cody’s hands travel up to the base of his skull.

“Want me to wash your hair?”

Seth nods, head lolling to the side with any guide from Cody’s hands. “Yeah. Yeah, please.”

“Do you need any special shampoo?”

Seth pauses. “Special shampoo?”

“For the blonde,” Cody explains. “I have my purple shampoo, if you want, but it’s in my bag.”

Seth shakes his head. “Normal shampoo. Don’t wanna move.”

“Comfy?” Cody asks, and his voice is addictive, almost a purr in Seth’s ear.

All Seth can do is nod.

The shampoo smells overly floral, like roses steeped in perfume, but Seth doesn’t mind. He barely notices. Cody’s fingers massage his scalp even better than his lower back, fingers in his hair and creating lather that somehow feels filthy as Cody drops his hands in the water to rinse it off. He rinses out the shampoo slowly, languidly, and it lights Seth’s body on fire.

“God,” Seth moans. “I could do this forever.”

“Yeah?” Cody says. “Don’t want anything else?”

Seth cackles. “I mean –” Cody tugs, gently, and Seth can’t stop himself before letting out what could quite possibly be a wail.

“If you’re this loud when it’s just my hands,” Cody says, directly into Seth’s ear, “I can’t wait to hear what it sounds like when you’re taking my dick.”

It is very likely a yelp, what comes out of Seth’s mouth. But it’s a good yelp. An intrigued yelp. A yelp that leads to an even more insistent boner.

“Yeah?” Cody murmurs. He presses a little harder and Seth fights back another, louder moan. “I love the sounds you make. Get loud, baby.”

Seth is not usually very good at following directions. But this is one he’s happy to follow. He babbles, moans, asks for more, and then suddenly Cody’s hands have moved around to rest on his stomach, low, and promising.

“You like my hands, yeah?” Cody murmurs. His hands slide between Seth’s legs, but they don’t go near Seth’s cock. Instead, Cody presses Seth’s legs open so his thighs spread across Cody’s legs. “There. Show me how pretty you are.”

Seth swallows. “I – yeah. How?”

“Any way you want,” Cody murmurs, and then there are lips on Seth’s neck, hot and branding. “I just wanna get in you, if you want.”

“Of course I do,” Seth scoffs. “Not everybody gets the champion on the night they won.”

“Not everybody gets you,” Cody says, and he sucks at Seth’s neck.

Seth whines. “Okay. I – okay. Soap outta my hair?”

“All rinsed out, baby.”

Seth shifts and his ass slides against Cody’s cock. “Oh, my god.”

Cody’s exhale tells Seth he’s not the only one on the edge. “No kidding.”

Seth shows off as he stands, making sure his ass is on display.

“A work of fucking art,” Cody says, reverently. “And I am going to destroy it.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, pretty boy,” Seth says, over his shoulder.

Cody’s grin is predatory, and Seth fights a shiver.

Seth reaches for the robe, but Cody’s on him before he can reach it. Seth is flattened against the door. There’s definitely some sort of retort in the back of his mind, something he wants to say in response, but Cody’s hands are on his ass, spreading his cheeks, and all words fail him.

“I was wondering when your attitude would come back,” Cody growls, and his thumbs knead into Seth’s ass. “This is more the guy who stabbed me with a kendo stick.”

“I think you’re the one doing the stabbing tonight, champ.”

Cody turns Seth around and shoves him against the door. He leans in and kisses Seth, deep and possessive and unyielding. There’s teeth involved, but even with all the aggression, Seth can tell he’s being careful of his back.

And suddenly, Seth knows. He knows why it hurt to hurt Roman for Cody. Because he was always aching for Roman to appreciate him, to know him, to care about him, even after anything. And he was willing to sacrifice that, forever, all to help Cody.

Seth turns his head to suck in air, drowning under the realization.

Cody pauses his hands. “Seth,” he says, voice soothing, “are you okay?”

“You care,” Seth says. “You care about me.”

“Of course I do,” Cody says, and it’s simple, like it’s obvious.

“I stabbed you with a kendo stick,” Seth says. “I did everything I could, recently, to hurt you.”

“And you did everything you could, even more recently, to protect me.” Cody reaches up and brushes wet hair from Seth’s face. “People change, Seth. You changed.”

“I changed,” Seth says, and he lets it wash over himself. “I changed.”

“You did,” Cody says. “You grew.”

Seth leans in again, kissing Cody softer this time. Cody knows. Cody knows he’s different now. Cody’s forgiven him.

He doesn’t have to beg Cody to accept his apology. He already has it. He doesn’t have to grovel, or hurt, or manipulate when all else fails.

“After everything,” Seth murmurs, lips pressed against Cody’s, “you want me.”

Cody smiles. “Of course I do.”

Seth feels a flame as Cody pulls him in, something cleansing and definitive. He feels the worst parts of himself, the parts that stick to him like grit and grim, burn away.

A phoenix comes to mind, but it doesn’t last as Cody’s hands smooth over him and guide him out of the bathroom. Seth leans into the feeling, to the offering up of control to someone who will do right by him.

“On the bed, baby, that’s it.”

Seth lowers himself down on the bed, smiling up at Cody without much awareness of why. It feels right.

“What do you want?” Cody asks, trailing fingertips up and down Seth’s thighs. He looks like a god, standing over Seth. He belongs in a painting, in a museum. “Talk to me, Seth.”

“Hmm?” Seth mumbles. “I – I want you.”

“I know that,” Cody says, hands sliding up higher. “I want specifics, though. I need to know what you’re looking for.”

Seth doesn’t mean to pointedly look down at Cody’s hard cock, but Cody’s chuckle tells him he does a bad job of masking it.

“Yeah?” Cody asks. “How do you want it?”

The image of Roman, the last time, looming over him, flipping him over, the memory of “So I don’t have to see that face,” said in a growl, strikes Seth.

“Like this,” Seth whispers. “I – I want you to fuck me when you can see me.”

“Good,” Cody says. “I want to see you, too.”

Seth feels tension fall away from him, like the last of Roman’s curse has been burned off of him by Cody’s touch. “Okay.”

Cody is incredibly gentle as he moves one of Seth’s legs. “I, um,” he says, and the blush is utterly charming. “I may have hoped for something like this.” He reaches into the slightly ajar bedside table and pulls out an impressively large bottle of lube. “Call it wishful thinking.”

“I think I will,” Seth says, back only slightly aching as Cody shifts back. He’s kneeling between Seth’s spread legs, looking at home there. Seth shivers, wanting to be closer. Knowing they will be closer. “You had no guarantee I’d come to your hotel suite, champ.”

“No,” Cody says, and he moves one of Seth’s legs over his shoulder. “I didn’t. But I had my hopes.” He looks at Seth. “Okay?”

Seth nods. He shuffles a little so he’s a bit more exposed, giving Cody better access. “I think this is the part where you get me all whiny with just your fingers.”

“Oh, you’re calling the shots now, huh?” Cody laughs. He pours a generous amount of lube on his fingers. “We’ll see how long that lasts.”

Seth doesn’t, like, whine or anything. No one could prove it.

“Tell me if anything hurts on your back or knee, okay?”

Seth nods. “I will.”

Eyes locked onto his, Cody slides his fingers between Seth’s cheeks and cautiously finds his hole. “Okay?” Cody murmurs, turning his head to press a kiss to Seth’s calf. Seth isn’t used to gentle. He hasn’t had gentle since – since his best friend had a different name, and since Roman was a different man.

He rolls his hips as Cody slowly coaxes his open, pressing for more until Cody presses in. Seth wants more, wants it fast, but Cody insists on taking his time, pumping in and out with concentrated motions that feel like riding a wave.

“More,” Seth pleads. “I want more.”

“I’ll give you more,” Cody promises. “But in a moment. I want to see you enjoy this.”

Seth whines. “I am enjoying it,” he says, huffy, “but I want more.”

“And you’ll get it,” Cody says, a little more firm this time. “But let yourself love this. Let yourself love the moment.”

So Seth does. He begs and pleads, holds on to Cody’s biceps, smiles through desperation and need. Cody laughs as Seth smiles, like it’s just as good for him to watch as it is for Seth to get it, and isn’t that something.

“Are you ready?” Cody asks, scissoring his fingers and brushing just the right spot for Seth to wail. “That sounds like a yes.”

“Yes,” Seth gasps. “Yes, now, I want you cock, Cody.” He lifts his head, ready to level him with his secret weapon. “Please, give me your cock, Champion.”

Cody groans. “You be careful with that one.”

“Don’t wanna be,” Seth says, and he meets Cody’s burning gaze. “Champ.”

Cody’s careful as he pulls his fingers out, at some point reaching three deep in Seth, and Seth feels tugged toward him as he tries to follow.

“Shh,” Cody says, adjusting himself. “I promise I’ll take care of you. I’m right here.”

And Seth believes him.

The first nudge of Cody’s cock against his rim sends Seth singing. He’s slow with it, focused, but doesn’t stop until he’s pushed flush against Seth’s ass. Seth’s mind is ringing with it. It’s happening. Cody’s inside of him, sharing his body, and he looks so blissed out as he bottoms out that Seth feels tears prick at the corners of his eyes.

“Are you okay?” Cody asks. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Seth says, and his voice sounds different, wrong, not his own. “I – it matters.”

“Of course it matters,” and Cody leans in to kiss him, shifting the angle. It’s glaring, how real it feels. Cody doesn’t even put on the belt or look at it, eyes on Seth’s face or body the whole time he slowly fucks into him. It’s been a long time since Seth has felt the romance in sex. Recently, it’s been a means to an end. Most of the time, to ensure a connection. Sometimes, to close a deal.

More than he’d like to admit, an apology.

This feels like a promise.

“Cody,” he whispers. “Kiss me?”

Without words, Cody obliges, and Seth tries to pour what he’s feeling through his lips. He tangle himself around Cody, and Cody takes his hands to link their fingers. Strong arms press him to the mattress, and Seth feels like he doesn’t need any control. He’s not out of control. He has put it into careful hands.

The world melts around them, blending into the moment and into Cody’s eyes. Cody is warm and real and present, lips creating magic with words and kisses.

And Seth wishes he had found this before.

“I –” He probably doesn’t need to ask to come. He probably could right now, and Cody wouldn’t mind. But it’s habit. “Cody, can I?”

“Can you what, baby?” Cody asks. His brow, furrowed in concentration, beads with sweat. Seth untangles his fingers to reach up and brush it off.

“Can I come?” he whispers.

Cody nods. “Anything you want,” he says, and it’s as much a demand as it is a promise. “Anything.”

Seth’s heart shifts, clenches, turns into molten lava, and he looks into Cody’s eyes as he wraps a hand around his cock and strokes.

“There you go,” Cody says. “All over me, baby. I want you all over me.”

Seth does as he’s told, because he wants to, because it will make Cody happy, because it feels good, and watches as he paints the two of them with his own come.

“Can – can I?” Cody asks. “Inside you, I mean?”

“Yeah,” Seth says, and he forgets the last time it wasn’t a given. “Please. I want you to.”

Cody laughs. “God, the idea of you asking – fuck.” It’s two more stuttering thrusts before Cody is buried into Seth, spilling into him. He hopes it stays forever. Cody drops his forehead to Seth’s. “What a night.”

“No shit,” Seth mumbles, but already he feels reality coming back, along with the feeling in his toes.

“How are you – doesn’t your leg hurt?” Cody asks, moving it back down to the bed as he shifts backward and pulls out.

Seth shrugs. “Crossfit Jesus, maybe, but I’m also pretty good at keeping flexible.”

“We’ll have to test that more,” Cody says, almost off hand.

“That mean this isn’t a one time thing?” Seth asks before he can stop himself.

Cody tilts his head, and Seth immediately thinks of a German shepherd. “I sure hope not.”

“Oh,” Seth says, and tension he hadn’t realized built releases. “Me too.”

They’re quiet as Cody falls beside him, and Seth’s heart does the twist thing again as Cody snuggles in and rests his head on his chest.

“A cuddler,” Seth says, interrupting himself with a yawn. “Should have seen that coming.”

“What?” Cody asks, shifting so he can throw big blue eyes at Seth in a sneak attack. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You big sappy crybaby,” Seth says, grinning. “All your emotions all out there, huh?”

“You were crying during sex,” Cody says.

“I – only during sex!” Seth says. “Never in the ring!” He decides not to mention his tears ringside. Hopefully nobody got video of it.

“Good to know.” Cody shifts so they’re eye to eye. “Are you staying here tonight?”

“Can I?”

Cody nods. “Of course. I got the big shower and tub, and all.”

“Planning on wooing me with good bathroom appliances?”

Cody chuckles. “Among other things.”

They shuffle their way to the shower, big enough for two. By the time they’re clean, they’re both yawning impossibly wide and wrapped up in the cozy robes.

“Bet you’re little spoon, too,” Seth says, curling into the big bed.

“Yup,” Cody mumbles. “Get over here.”

Seth wraps his arms around Cody’s waist and Cody pulls him in tighter, snuggling back against him.

“Goodnight, Champ,” he whispers into Cody’s hair.

Cody squeezes his hand. “Goodnight, Seth.”

Seth sleeps.

Mini Playlist: Rerun - Honey Revenge Smoke - PVRIS Take My Pain Away - Anarbor Look After You - The Fray

#CodySeth #LOOK I DIDN'T MEAN TO #THIS IS THEIR FAULT #THEM WITH THE TEARS AND THE BOOBOO EYES AND THE LOVE #wtf i like wrestling now???#in which sara writes #Also this is unofficially for Sarah but in a rage way #Why do they always make me write angst?!

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pluralthey · 1 year ago

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does shiloh… like jessie? it seems like jessie is head over heels for her, and they have a lot of good times, but does shiloh actually like jessie? or are they exclusively interested in seeing what a relationship with god is like? jessie is a jerk but it makes me sad to think their relationship could be so one-sided. but besides that, can you please tell us more about jessie's parents? i really like them :)

Good question. I do think she likes jessie — for her energy and ensuing chaos, but also for her angry, antisocial nature. I don't think Shiloh likes most people, and having someone else express it is cathartic. She likes seeing someone who's an asshole in general melt or become flustered in a more intimate setting, she thinks it's cute.

That's kinda why I think they'd still work in a more normal world where Jessie has no powers, buuutttt in the context of idletry I think it's impossible to untangle how much of the things she likes in Jessie aren't related to her being God, in her eyes.

Shiloh definitely doesn't feel attraction or fondness for Jessie as intensely as vice versa, but I don't think Shiloh feels ANY emotion as intensely as Jessie... For a variety of reasons, like the fact that she is better able to predict likely outcomes while Jessie is dense enough to feel blindsided by anything outside of her normal.

Jessie's dad, Adam, is a very chill guy similar in personality to Shiloh with a lot more love in his heart. He's agreeable to a fault, has more patience than a busy doctor, loves to teach and garden, retired several years prior to the start of the story, and spends a lot of time napping. His back was fucked a decade or two ago and it's gotten worse with age, but it was at its worst after surgery a long time ago. For his career I'm thinking high school math teacher, but it's up in the air rn.

Jessie and Emily both like him more than their mother because he isn't as strict, and this isn't subtle — for jessie in particular, as she isn't a subtle person in general, and a father figure validates her more masculine identity more than a mother figure does. she seems to just like more laid back personalities in general because she butts heads with them less.

Jessie's mom, Evelyn, is more high-strung, anxious, and very opinionated. She is still a relatively calm person, but compared to Adam, she's incurably neurotic. She used to be sportier to expend some of her energy, but she was eventually too busy, and struggled to jump back into it when she had more time. She is an introvert and needs a lot of alone time; she likes to pass time solving puzzles, reading, reorganizing things that don't need to be organized, and so on. She's most comfortable when she feels like she's fixing something, and she can sometimes look for something wrong where everything is fine to achieve that state. I feel like she changed jobs several times over her lifetime without a consistent career. Her side of the family was probably the one to help with financial struggles.

She is similarly no longer working, but doesn't have as many physical impediments as Adam. Initially, she stopped working to help Adam more when he was less mobile. Emily wasn't so available, and Jessie was on some intense medications, so there were just not enough hands on deck.

Evelyn is the one who reeled in Jessie and Emily as kids and set hard boundaries. This dynamic makes her relationship with them more strained in some ways (especially Jessie, who clashes more as another high-strung person), but dealing with the harder issues and emotions also gave her a more nuanced connection to them than Adam has. Emily understands the nuance more than Jessie, but both of them feel the intense sense of comfort people typically feel from their mothers.

Hope that was interesting enough. It's hard explaining her parents honestly.

#idletry #ask #asks #not art

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m00nz-artpad · 5 months ago

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The demonization of a traumatized woman

People were obsessed with the fictionalized tales of that of "Iron Man", "The Hulk", "Spider-Man", and more. What people were just learning was that those stories were all true. Those mutants, mutates, and even humans with special abilities existed. One of them was a woman now only known as "The Badger".

Olivia hated that name. She abandoned it long ago after she gave up the life of crime and finally joined society. She wasn't "Badger, the Outlaw" anymore, she was just Olivia. So when she saw her old nickname in comic book stands in the streets, she was disgusted and furious. Peter had act gotten the first issue because he was interested in finding out if it was even close to her true life story.

Instead, it was fictionalized. Made just to get money and in the process demonizing a real person who had to deal with the repercussions. Gone were the days of "Olivia, the woman who wanted to see the good in people". Now it was "Olivia, the whore who killed for fun and hated everybody". Peter had tried to console Olivia through the stress of being made out to be a monster and whore who only wanted to seduce men and murder without care, but she knew nothing would change people's minds. She was now the monster they wanted her to be.

If you think Olivia's appearance if different, you are 100% correct. I purposefully changed her appearance for the fictional comic in this fic. It's kind of funny how "The Badger" the comic is like fanfiction of my fanfic.

I wanted to make it obvious that the people in this fic don't understand Olivia while also criticizing a lot of "tough comic book femme fatale" tropes at the same time. Due to knowing her story, the reader (once the fic is finished at least) will understand her and understand she's not a brainless monster, instead she's an extremely complicated and traumatized woman. But everybody only sees her as crass, brainless, and hypersexual for fun. That's what the comic is all about; demonizing her and making her out to be a proper monster.

However, as mentioned in "The Clash of Worlds", at some point by 2014 or so there's a plotline where she has a "redemption arc" based around the time that Olivia and Peter met and started to form a relationship. This even is a critical look at the trope of a character changing because of someone else, especially a "tough" woman becoming "softer" for a man. Which is the complete opposite of Olivia.

I'm not saying that those kind of tropes are bad. Some of my favorite comics, stories, shows, and even movies have the femme fatale falling in love and changing for the better trope in it. What I don't like is when it's done wrong, which is exactly what the comic "The Badger" has done.

The writers of the comic completely bastardized Olivia and her story, breaking her down as nothing more than just a sexy caricature of who "The Badger" is. Also the comic has nothing to do with her past as a former outlaw, only mentioning Arthur and Javier in passing once or twice throughout the comic.

(Also anothing funfact about the comic is that before she gets with Peter in the storyline, she was actually with Kurt. Because in the storyline of the first X-Men animated series + X-Men '97 she's romantically involved with him. But not in this timeline, because she and Kurt are simply just very good friends who have a very familial relationship.)

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charlieslowartsies · 1 year ago

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Hey, so I'm not sure if someone has asked you yet, but I'm fascinated by how you use the Cybertronian language in your transformers fics. How does it work exactly?

This got long, and I’m sorry as always. Thank Primus for read mores.

For starters when I FIRST began working on Resonance and realized I wanted to try putting Cybertronian into it, I read the wiki page, more specifically the opening paragraph:

It should be little surprise, given a moment's thought, that distinct Cybertronian languages exist. The Transformers did not go about speaking English or any other known Earth language long ages ago on their distant metal world. Though the records of such conversations are frequently translated for us, we should not forget that these conversations originally flowed in odd electronic syllables past strange metallic lips, or were etched by alien hands long eons before the first humans painted muddy shapes upon dark cave stone.

‘Fuck.’ Was my first thought. ‘I’m about to try and work an ancient language into this damn fic about a human and an alien robot boning/becoming soul mates…and I want it to be believable.’

‘College linguistics comes back to haunt me.’ Was my second.

So I’ve mashed several continuities together, from the comics to the tv show to the Bay/Knight movies. That sort of gave me a big door way to wedge information through, winding it around plot, and Cade and Prime’s interactions. There’s also more than one alphabet, because of course there is.

I wanted Cade and the Reader to bond as much as Cade and Prime did learning, and Prime teaching him/us. While Cade’s spent a handful of years with the 2.0 team, any lessons would be sort of like Cybertronian 101, rough and dirty. I didn’t want him fluent, (because how?) and reliant on the bots to explain more than they assumed. (Taken shamelessly from my own background. My mom and Uncle speak fluent Spanish but I know broken bits and pieces. I can swear like a sailor though.)

I also leaned into sticking to verbal lessons and displays of the language in action, instead of ‘Cade read a book’ which I think helped make it more…interesting? Hopefully!

Things, phrases, and manners of speaking Cade would be interested in just to help him survive among the bots. The word for ‘I’m a medic, don’t shoot my ass, I can help you!’ is kinda more important than names for Cybertron’s dead Primes or famous landscapes/battles.

Cade can speak Cybertronian better than he can read it, and indeed in Resonance the language is dying among its own kind, sort of like in Atlantis: The Lost Empire. (Not as degraded/gone though.) A younger mech that hatched off Cybertron and grew up amongst the stars only knows what they’ve heard/read or if an older mech transferred the language to them.

I decided to lean into Transformer’s physiology and history and create a few rules to stick to. Here’s a few from my notes, subject to have changed but I don’t think I contradicted them??

1. Transformers do not have a word or specific phrase for ‘please’ in Cybertronian. Instead of ‘Please do/give/take/etc X’ it would simply be removed from the vernacular. You don’t really ask a lot, you demand/take/coerce/threaten.

2. Yes is ‘Affirmative’ and no is ‘Negative’ and used more frequently than yes/no in reply to someone.

4. Short, stilted, and cutting phrases should make up the language when being translated into English. Blunt, but inseparable.

5. Delicate, kind, or sweet terms when being soft or gentle with a treasured person, such as an offspring, friend or mate. Long, lyrical, almost poetic??

6. Repetition to increase intention. “This is very good!” becomes “Good-good-good!” and perhaps engines might be made to purr a little to indicate pleasure/enjoyment/contentment, or optics would be squeezed shut for trust blinks like cats lol!

7. Nonverbal vocalizations slip in and out around Cybertronian as much as English. Static might come across grating to us, but static to a Transformer could mean confusion, alarm, or merely mumbling to oneself. It might not indicate stress—humans hear static and would be troubled, but a mech might be confused if a human heard their staticy sounds and assumed something was wrong. (Reversal, soft and wet sounds are jarring and foreign to Transformers, or usually mean something malfunctioning to them. Whistling from our lips is a great trick, they would think.) Steam whistles, and metal whistles but organic creatures making the noise? Woah!

8. There ARE other dialects but not gunna parse into them deeply or I’ll go nuts and the fic will derail. EX: Vosian (Vos) Vilocitronian (Vilocitron), Kaonic (Kaon) etc. Combatron is a colony thank god,can get away with it dominantly Cybertronian if I need it.

9. Look into Dragon Langauge/Thu’um and study.

10. Cade and Prime are ‘You-and-I’ when talking to one another, their special designation for each other. ‘They-Who-Are-One’ means the same but used by third parties. Prime also uses ‘Light-of-my-Spark’ or Sparklight, and ‘Cade-Beloved’

Those are old notes, dating back from Res’ early chapters in 2019.

Part of what helped me picture how I wanted the language to work was translating bot’s names into what I imagined their ‘true’ designations would be. It became kind of fun, actually. Especially seeing how short names could turn into long, almost lyrical titles. I wanted Cybertronian to sound harsh, heavy, and grating to humans in the fic, but also at its heart be flowing, connected and ever changing like the bot’s themselves.

Some were self explanatory to their ‘English’ version, some more esoteric. Starscream became ‘Screams-Like-Dying-Starlight.’ Terrifying but it paints a picture of what he does, what kind of fight he will give you, etc. As did ‘In-His-Crosshairs’ or ‘Drifts-Through-Darkest-Skies.’ Saying that 'Crosshairs and 'Drift' were what they were called on English seemed like a good way to show that we, as humans, are the aliens to them as much as they're alien to us?

Optimus Prime had other titles that both worked as nicknames or insults, depending on who said it their inflection. ‘He-Who-Reigns-War’ was meant to be heartbreaking as it was, well, kinda true. He doesn’t like it, Cade doesn’t like it. Many Autobots won’t use it.

Because I don’t study linguistics/zero time to study as much as I’d like, I have to absolutely work on rules and tweak them on the fly. I try to stick their speech being present, more than temporary.

‘Did you get hurt?’ would become ‘Hurting?’ and ‘I don’t like this at all, this is scary!’ becomes ‘Do-Not-Like! Scared!’

I wanted the Cybertronian dialect in Resonance to be emotive and rich in gestures, and firm statements. Abstract but ‘in the moment’ and very much still reliant on body language and tone versus tons of explanations or verbal hypothetical’s. There are noises and sounds humans cannot pronounce in this language, but there are work arounds within reason and, of course, a Cybertronian listening a human speak any Earth language can engage almost within minutes through learning and copying.

I hope this answered your question DX Sorry for the rambling!! If you read this far 200 cookies for youuuu

#resonance #barn husbands #cybertronian #tf #optimus prime

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